#I've seen the pictures and I was EXTREMELY cute

[cookinguptales]

From the Halloween asks:

✨ - Best Halloween memory?

Ohhhhh hmm. I had a lot of fun trick-or-treating at Disney World while I was a teen, but admittedly the people I usually went with... make it less of a positive memory, in retrospect. One year we did all make homemade Lock, Shock, and Barrel masks and we looked fantastic. lmao

I also have really, really loved some of Sleep No More's Halloween parties, but I've never actually gone on Halloween proper, I don't think...

I lived on a floor full of Ancient Studies/Museum Studies majors when I was a freshman in college and we all watched The Mummy and wrapped each other up in toilet paper and that was fun, too...

Honestly, though, if it comes to like Pure Joy, there was this one year I went trick-or-treating with my best friend in Ohio. We were probably like... idk, 8? And it was the absolute apex of the Wonder Ball craze.

(For my non-American followers, they were sort of like Kinder Eggs but usually had toys relating to popular children's brands like Disney. The toy version was eventually made illegal here just like Kinder Eggs are, lmao. They replaced the toy with shitty candies.)

My dad never let me get one at the grocery store when he let me pick out a treat because they were so expensive (a whole dollar, lmao) so I desperately wanted one. They still had toys in them back then and everyone wanted one. But I'd never gotten one.

So Jody and I go trick-or-treating and we come to this quiet cul-de-sac that apparently no kids went to...? And there was this nice couple there who had clearly decided to go all-out for Halloween and they'd bought an entire box of Wonder Balls. Since no other kids had shown up, they let Jody and I take like five each and it was glorious.

I remember going back to her house and her dad had the Simpsons Halloween special on TV (fun for me as I was not allowed to watch The Simpsons back then) and we broke open our Wonder Balls and had a great night. :')

[plaguedoctormemes]

oh also, No, I like cohost but I'm not going to treat it like "the next tumblr" or anything, or have high hopes for it but I'm just saying the writing is on the wall for Tumblr. they've been trying to monetize this platform for a decade and keep failing, so if one day if it all just goes kaput at least there's another place to reside in in the meantime. I think everyone here should shitpost and say even more death threats and reclaim more slurs if not for the fun of it then to poison the datasets even further

[yawnderu]

hi, i've only discovered your writing recently but i can't even explain how much i love it 😭 it's like that one anon who i think said that it feels very real, like you're getting 4k ultra hd 8d view of the scene lol 🩷

i really like your bimbo reader posts but i also sort of enjoy seeing them from this point of view that's like.... "this is not his gfs """"constant"""" style but he just lets her be in this kind of persona sometimes because it's relaxing to let him do all the work and thinking for her from time to time".

i hope this makes sense 😭 thank you for writing something that's this cute and wholesome i just love it

Thank you so much sweetheart, this is really lovely!! 😭😭😭<3

Yeah!! I totally get where you're coming from!! She's not exactly dumb, it's actually quite the opposite. I'd like to hc her as a girl who managed to get into a very good university and is studying astrophysics simply because she liked watching stars as a child. She's not dumb— just a girl who grew up extremely sheltered and hasn't seen the world through the eyes of someone who has had a difficult life, like Simon.

There's certain naivety that while it can be dangerous, she's been learning more and more about with Simon's help about stranger danger and trusting her instinct, but the girl is always surrounded by people who enjoy seeing her thrive and always teach her the things that her parents didn't.

I'd say in general she has a very good life, and now paired with Simon, someone whose entire soul wants to see her thrive?? She gets to turn off her brain and simply let him take control— he sometimes picks her clothes for her, dressing her up to the best of his capacity even when he's not a fashion guy.

This man has studied all her Instagram pictures because she's mesmerizing and he loves her that much, yet it also gives him the chance to more or less know what combinations she likes to wear. He still remembers the time she looked at him like he grew a second head for trying to make her wear dots and lines— but he never made that same mistake again.

They work surprisingly well together despite basically being on complete opposite sides of a spectrum, and at the end of the day, they work this well because they're both equally in love with the other.

Simon is level-headed and that gives her the chance to simply be herself without worrying about anything, he gives her a sense of security that she's never gotten with anyone else, while bimbo!reader gives Simon the love and affection he never even dared to think about. The main thing is that she looks and treats him like he's worth something how good of a soldier he is. Hell, she doesn't even know he's a soldier, she simply found the most brooding and intimidating guy and fell in love with him before she even knew it.

They both spoil each other a lot. Simon buys her things, treats her with patience and love, and generally treats her like the princess that she is, while she takes care of Simon like no other. She does face masks with him, gives him massages, does his manicure (trimming and cleaning his nails, putting lotion on his calloused hands), and is overall as patient as they come.

They're a pretty wholesome pair and quite honestly I enjoy writing about them a lot, the love they have for each other is fully pure and it makes me happy. :')

Sorry for going off here HJBEFJBHKFEHBKJEFHBJK I wrote too much but God, I love this pair SO fucking much

Bimbo!Reader Masterlist

[chailovesu]

a list of everything ive manifested and what i want to manifest

having alot of friends + also having at least one best friend (in short never being lonely)

people always approaching me first

not living with desired people

instant appearance changes

instant weather changes

very very pretty almond doe eyes and long eyelashes

a puppy

oddly specific tiktoks to pop on my fyp

being "popular" in school

having big boobs and a big butt naturally

being a semi big submaker

my face shape (younger me listened to round shape face subliminals but i had a thin one before)

alot of mcdonalds

bigger prettier lips

alot of sps coming back because i believed in the saying "they always come back"

revising something completely and there being no evidence of it ever happening

long breaks off of school (i feel like since i was listening to ALOT of "cancel school" subliminals b4 the corona break and i've had so many breaks off of school)

soft pretty 3a/3b hair

alotttt of compliments

being seen as very attractive in my own eyes and other ppls

being alot of ppls comfort person everyone tells me they enjoy my company

being right abt random things

manifested alot of things for my old friend

constantly passing classes knowing damn well i didn't do any work 😭 went from a 34 to a 92 doing absolutely nothing

all my teachers liking me enough to bump my grades to passing even if i did nothing in their classes

strangers always being nice to me all the time

people being obsessed with me (i don't recommend manifesting this 😭) 

being lucky in games 

immediate weight loss

having 300+ absences when the county's limit was 10 a semester and never getting in trouble for it

moving out of houses 

being spoiled by people irl and online simply for being attractive

ppl texting me immediately after i think abt them

being able to manifest fast in general 

having a high pitched cute voice

+ other tiny things

what im current manifesting

being extremely rich + living in a mansion

knowing how to speak Spanish, Korean, and French

revising any trauma I've experienced

desired baby pictures and childhood memories

having no anxiety and never overthinking

being everyones type + being like kokomi teruhashi

revising that i have close childhood friends

butt length hair

having no body hair

having a vivid imagination

4.0 gpa + perfect attendance + being naturally smart + being good at math

hazel eyes with mostly green

a cat and a pink bird and a bunny + my current dogs but they're all going to be babies and get along well (also manifesting that ik how to manage all of them)

being shorter

desired parents + only one sibling

a lot of rich love interests

desired body and face

old friends coming back

being a huge submaker like roy

bringing certain family members back to life

im manifesting this by affirming and listening to subliminals because thats what i prefer

[midnightblues444]

Two man job |

College! Geto and Gojo x fem! Reader

Part one here

Warning: smut, m oral, and guided masturbation, threesome, nastiest thing I've written

"I've never gone this far with a guy before"

a term you found is a key to wrapping them around your fingers .

You've said this to both Gojo and Geto in the last 4 weeks of seeing them. each on different occasions that you carefully planned out.

Fucking around with best friends is no easy job, theres always risk that the other will find out. Yet so far theres no sign that either knows.

You usually meet up with Gojo in his car, driving around in the late hours of the night.Gojo was the faster of the two, almost so rabidly horny it was cute. He would always attach pictures of him in his boxers to all his messages.

Sometimes sending ones with his print as the focal point. This is where youd use your innocent persona saying you're blushing or something like that.

Leading Gojo to believe he taught you how to suck dick. You gave him a nervous whine, and look up at him and said: "I dont know how Toru"

"You'll be fine" he encourage, throwing his head back as you eased him down your throat. His sheer size made you feel like a true virgin again, struggling to take his length drooling all over it.

"just like that" he'd huff, guiding you with a gentle push

His groans, and thrusts picked up as you started tearing up. As he got closer and closer he let out deep whiny moans, making your clit throb. Hes needy and his pale face is flushed pink as he leaks into your mouth.

Geto on the other hand is, sensual and extremely domineering. He'd usually invite you over, and his place was clean and always prepped for you. He would ease into everything he did with you.

Passion in all that he touches, you usually dont have to crank up your innocent act because he makes you nervous enough.

"You ever touch yourself" he'd whisper in your ear

"Well I try to but cant finish" youd admit embarrassed

"I'll show you how then"

Seating you in his lap, his hand over your own as his thick fingers working themselves in and out of your wetness.

Hed coopraise, as you sigh and moan his name. Arching needily into his touch, working another finger in even when you whine that two's too much. He drooling at how slick you are, living for every sound you make for. That you shake and beg for him as you came all over his fingers.

A steady stream of links with both, you find yourself getting too comfortable that's probably why you dont check if they're together when you text them anymore.

The next thing you know, Getos asking you to come over.

You're nervous but excited, skipping to the familiar building. Pressing the elevator for his floor, with giddy butterflies flooding your stomach (and coochie)

You add a cute flare to your knock, adjusting your skirt and everything. You even baked cookies for this link.

Geto half opens the door, smirking down at you with a look you've never quite seen before. You smile at him.

"I baked us some cookies" you presenting him the box

"Is there enough for me"

The door opening fully, to reveal Gojo in all his glory.

"What you say (name) is there enough for three?"

They both laugh at your defeated look, you feel obligated to walk in. Shifting awkwardly on the couch, shrinking into the cushions. The loud sound of them chewing the cookies you baked fills the silence.

"You know what, I'm outta here" you say, standing abruptly. Mustering as much confidence as possible.

"But we just started" Geto feigns sadness

"Take a cookie" Gojo offers amused

They're worse when they're together. Matching cruelly unserious smirks as the play with you.

"Look, if you want an apology.." you start,

They laugh in a weird unison, looking at each other with mischief

"Suguru, you want an apology"

"That depends on how she apologizes, Satoru"

They look to you, expectedly, you can only shrug your shoulders unsure to what they're playing at. Studying they're expressions you cant seem to read.

"Maybe she could beg?" Gojo circled around to sit on your left

"Maybe she could get on her knees, do what shes good at" Geto sat to the right

You're their prey as of now, catching on to what they want from you. You fight back a smirk, it's been hard to conceal that your lowkey into the corruption aspect of this affair. You liked pretending to be a lamb and them the big bad wolves.

"I'll do anything you ask" you say

°《♡•`*☆》° °《♡•`*☆》° °《♡•`*☆》°

Sandwiched between the two men, you feel as though you'll explode right there. 3 orgasms in, Geto fucks you from the front and Gojo in the back. Harshly thrashing in and out of you.

"Too rough" you sob out incoherently, feeling like they're in your stomach

"Aww shes cryin" Gojo pinches your nipple, Geto kissing your tearful cheeks

The masochistic assholes, folding you in half are mean. Getting off to your tears, I mean you hurt their pride and now it's getting taken out on you.

You can feel their collective throbbing, they've switch positions after each rounds. Both taking turns between your cunny and ass.

"Fuck shes so tight, I'm gonna bust" gojo groans as he finishes and it leaks down your ass

"God shes perfect" Geto huffs out, you cant respond your too drunk on the sensation. Your g spot Perfectly getting hit each time, as Gojos slender fingers circle your abused clit roughly.

You can feel that knot inside you tear, almost painfully as you gush. Your eyes roll to the back of your head and you fall limp on Gojos chest.

Uncontrolled and messy,

"Dude no way"

"We should make her do it again"

[mmani-e]

I've finally finished my Danganronpa AU personal project! I personally call it

DANGANRONPA: DEMIX

See Demix 1 here

And yeah, all the swaps as you can see above, and these guys in the middle are the replacements for Monokuma and Usami respectively:

Check out under the cut for some design insights on my take AND closer pictures of each pair:

Finally finished my personal AU project. I hope it's to everyone's liking!

I can go on forever about these designs but I'll limit myself to one-two sentences on some facts about the designs.

Mikan: Mikan's face tattoo was commissioned on her against her will so that she can never hide her nature as a Yakuza, but her leg tattoo was done on purpose, and she and Nagito have matching tattoos on their legs, his is just hidden most the time.

Nagito: He is usually seen with a spear and prefers the weapon over the sword, but he is more famous for his natural skill with the blade. That said, he resents the blade and wishes he could be recognized for the things he actually works hard to do, like throwing spears or protecting Mikan and her family.

Ibuki: I kept her design very similar to her base design because she pretty much just looks like a student, and I don't want to change anyone's personality so there's no reason for her to not get highlights. But I gave her some more symmetry in this design and gave her a cute little semi ahoge I guess with a hair tie, bc she doesn't naturally have one.

Imposter/Gamemaster: Yeah I made the big brain choice to keep him with his colors as "Byakuya" because it made for a more striking visual, and more recognizeable as the impostor. Also I made him too tall because I wanted to give him big legs lol.

Hiyoko: Her four cats are named Heart (scraggly cat), Mr. Pearls (sleepy cat), Big Red (Giant cat), and BB (black cat) bc canonically the four dark devas are named after shonen manga, I named her cats after pokemon games, which she canonically likes playing. Also chickens are her favorite animal, despite her love of cats.

Kazuichi: Kazuichi's not a natural born prince, through shenanigans it turns out he's extremely distantly related to some royal line in a microstate north of germany called "Nordsumpf." Their main exports are cars and Kazuichi is still new to being a prince.

"Kyoko": She'd try her best to act like Kyoko, but she's a little too meek and openy affectionate to pull it off properly. Also her knockers are way bigger than Kyoko's, so there's an immediate discrepancy to the trained eye.

Also in my au of DR1, Kyoko is the ultimate affluent progeny and Makoto is author/serial killer.

Hajime: His hair is actually extremely long back there, he just keeps it tied up. On shows he lets it all out and a wears red contacts, his stage name is "Izuru."

Sonia: Sonia became a team manager because she was escaping an assasination attempt, strolled into a junior laegue soccer game, took over for the coach and started just barking orders and the team won. They were the worst team in the whole league and after that she just sorta stuck around them and won them the championships.

Gundham: Gundham was orginally meant to wear the japanese flag… but there was too much white in his design so I cut it. He has names for all of his gymnast moves and he announces them very loudly when he does any of them.

Peko: I tried to give Peko a unique sort of "zombie survivor" kinda vibe so while she's clearly a mechanic first she can also just fucking kill you by braining you with that monkey wrench. Most of the time she's cool though, she's just like horribly dependent on other people to tell her what to do, so she attaches to Kazuichi because he's the most immediately available authority figure.

Fuyuhiko: He's got that sort of machismo that makes him not like to admit he loves dancing, but the moment he's complimented on it he'll really appreciate it. Also he's still part of a crime family, but it's just not as strong as Mikan's.

Akane: She really looks sporty still, but don't worry she's definitely "lucky," she's just much more focused on the future than her bad luck in the moment… which can be very bad, actually, and can make her come across as kind of aloof.

Nekomaru: Why is nurse Nekomaru not as common a thing. Just think about it, it's perfect. Nekomaru here got inspired by the bravery and hard work of the nurses that treated him and boom he became a nurse, nobody tougher than healthcare professionals after all.

Mahiru: Mahiru as a nurse is honestly a really really really fun concept but I feel like I wasn't very ambitious here, and I can't really show it through the drawing but one of my early drafts had her look more like a european chef a la gordon ramsey bc I headcanon her as a scot.

Teruteru: Decided to give him a raincoat which my sister pointed out to me could also be a trenchcoat, which is just PERFECT for a creep like him. It just writes itself man, though seriously he's mostly a landscape photographer who specializes in pics of the countryside. Still a huge perv tho.

Usowa: Name is a combo of Usagi and Chowa, the word for Harmony. She's less like a chaotic force of nature like Monokuma and more a manipulative and hardline teacher who coaxes the students into doing awful things by playing into their insecuritoies with motives, and which then causes them to kill, allowing her to punish them, "weeding out the weak and undisciplined among their ranks." She replaces Monokuma.

Kyojuma: Name is a combo of Kyoju (professor) and Kuma. He's a pretty silly guy with an easy temper to poke at, but he's good at heart and tries his best to be a more sort of "fun" teacher than the rules lawyer Usami kinda was. He just wants to help his students, too bad Usowa showed up and decidedly does NOT like his approach.

[lilirari]

🏍️ everyone's favourite biker couple is out on a nye bike date

💌 biker! oscar piastri x biker! fem! reader (social media au)

💭 author's note : this is very short but i've been having oscar brainrot again (don't i always ?) and idk how but i'm always on the biker side of instagram these days so i just decided to put these two together and feed my own delusions hehe. anyways this is my last smau for this year ! thank you all for making 2023 fun and memorable <3 see you next year ;)

twitter 🫖

instagram 🎥

yourinstagram 11 minutes ago | oscarpiastri 9 minutes ago

seen by yourbestie, landonorris, logansargeant and 1,293,456 others

yourinstagram

🎶 slow down : chase atlantic

liked by oscarpiastri, yourbestie, fabioquartararo20 and 30,188,293 others

yourinstagram i ❤️ bikers (oscar)

view all 99,183 comments

yourinstagram we don't slow down though we like the fast life 😋

-> oscarpiastri we are speed

-> liamlawson30 the lightning mcqueen dialogue summoned me

yourinstagram also LS2 helmets in the last slide for logansargeant 🤭

-> logansargeant glad to know that y'all still remember me 😐

oscarpiastri my pretty girl

oscarpiastri step on me

-> yourinstagram what

-> oscarpiastri what

-> user81 LMAO HE'S WILDINNNN

oscarpiastri mine mine mine

oscarpiastri god you look so fine in that first picture

oscarpiastri did you have to include that picture of me swinging though 😞

-> yourinstagram ofc ! you look so cute 🥹

-> yourinstagram (he fell down right after this picture was taken btw)

-> oscarpiastri hey now you don't have to mention that

-> user44 NOT Y/N SNITCHING ON HIM LMAO

yourbestie GIRL YOU LOOK SO FINEEEE SO SLAYFUL

yourbestie ABSOLUTELY ATE !!!!

-> yourinstagram I LOVE YOUUUUU my hype girl 🫶

yourbestie THAT'S MY GF Y'ALL

-> oscarpiastri that's MY gf 🤨

-> yourinstagram chill guys there's enough y/n for everyone

-> oscarpiastri yeah well i don't share though 💁🏻‍♂️

-> yourinstagram why did i find that extremely hot

-> oscarpiastri you're extremely hot

-> yourbestie oh no nvm guys please don't start making out in the comments

logansargeant not giving this post a like because i'm a hater !!!!

-> yourinstagram is it bc we didn't invite you

-> logansargeant what else do you think it is 😒

-> yourinstagram logan pookie we're sorry 😭 but it was just meant to be an us thing today

-> yourinstagram we even wore the helmets with your initials man

-> yourinstagram we'll call you on our next ride, aight ?

-> logansargeant fine 😐

user16 ughhh y/n's an absolute goddess

user55 THAT OUTFIT THOUGH ??? SLAY QUEEN

user02 the LS2 helmets are so cute :(

user20 OMG SLOW DOWN AS THE SONG ARGGHHH

user22 YNOSCAR ARE SO CHASE ATLANTIC CODED 😩😩

user23 OSCAR LOOKS SO HOT IN THAT FOURTH SLIDE WHAT

user63 SHE SAID FVCK ME LIKE I'M FAMOUS I SAID OKAY 🗣️🗣️🗣️

user24 Y/N ARE YOU A CHASE ATLANTIC FAN

-> yourinstagram YEAHHHHH OFC BRO CHASE ATLANTIC >>>>>>

-> user27 i think i've fallen in love with y/n all over again

-> oscarpiastri user27 same

user04 why's oscar kinda fine..

-> user01 WDYM KINDA HE'S ALWAYS BEEN FINE

-> yourinstagram facts user01 !!!

user03 GOD WHEN IS MY TURN GOING TO COME

user10 MY FAVOURITE BIKER COUPLE 🫶

user11 icb the two hottest people on the planet are dating it all feels surreal

user14 WHERE'S MY BIKER BF 😭😠

user18 i love you both so much 🥹

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oscarpiastri

🎶 ohmami : chase atlantic

liked by yourinstagram, landonorris, logansargeant and 40,293,455 others

oscarpiastri nye with my baby 🖤

view all 107,293 comments

yourinstagram thank you for making my 2023 worthwhile, oz 🫶

　liked by oscarpiastri

yourinstagram can't wait to spend another whole year with you <3

　liked by oscarpiastri

yourinstagram i love you, my favourite boy🤍

-> oscarpiastri i love you, my favourite girl 🖤

logansargeant 🤢🤢👎🏻👎🏻

-> yourinstagram this is the reason why you're still single and why you didn't have anyone to kiss you on nye you HATER

-> user77 HELP Y/N THAT'S SO FOUL

-> logansargeant you didn't have to call me out like this 😧

landonorris that guy on the second slide looks kinda cute

-> oscarpiastri he's taken

-> landonorris aww that's too bad 😞 does his girlfriend want to share him with me ?

-> yourinstagram no his gf does not share 🤍

landonorris questionable hand placement on that third slide though 🤨

-> logansargeant no seriously why is she grabbing him like that 😧

-> yourinstagram it's comfortable 🤭

-> oscarpiastri your single arses won't know how it feels like to be touched by a woman

-> landonorris ok foul 💀

-> logansargeant you guys are such haters #ynoscarsinglephobic

-> user30 SINGLEPHOBIC PLEASE IM CRYING

-> user05 nah fr they're giving us singles too much pain it's time to cancel ynoscar

user08 I WANT WHAT THEY HAVEEEE 😭😭

user14 again... WHERE THE FRICK IS MY BIKER BF HUHHH

user06 God i see what you've done for others

user47 THE HAND PLACEMENT ON THE THIRD SLIDE GAWDDAMN

user66 i so badly want to be y/n in the third slide

user58 ynoscar do you want a dog i can bark

user49 i feel faint after seeing these pictures

user07 dayummm oscahhhhh

user56 that fourth picture 😩😩😩😩😩 (aggresive slamming on the desk)

user84 i too want to be carried around by oscar

user34 THE KING AND QUEEN OF BIKERTOK AND BIKESTAGRAM

user09 he's such a cutie patootie look at his bread cheeks in the 2nd slide ☹️

user21 the way they're looking into each other's eyes in the last slide 🥹🥹🥹

user95 ynoscar >>>>>>>> any other couple

view more comments

© LILIRARI, 2023 ★

[ms-demeanor]

sex work is work, no problem with that, but spamming sex work absolutely everywhere now is not okay. bot or not, it is not okay to shove your probably fake/stolen tits or ass into everyone's face even where kids are. it is absolutely the lowest, cheapest trash doing that. are these people showing their barely covered up pussy to school kids on the street to maybe get a customer? because they are doing exactly that on the internet. if you cant find customers and need to lower yourself to std ridden junkey trash standards who missed the way and entitled themselves to begging for money outside trash town, zero support from me!

Yeah you really sound like someone who supports sex workers. That's what I always think when I hear people using words like "disease-ridden" and "junkie" - 'wow, that person must be SUCH an ally. braver than any US marine, thank you for your service, person who believes sex work is work but thinks STIs or drug addiction are 'trash'.'

So, point by point:

It's not absolutely everywhere. You don't see people trying to link their onlyfans on facebook most of the time (i've actually never seen it but i could believe it is happening, though it's not common because FB has real-name policies that are unfriendly to sex workers). You're unlikely to see fansly links as sidebar ads on cspan. People aren't linking their pages in the amazon reviews. You're seeing it "everywhere" because you're not going anywhere. Tell me you spend all your time on two to three platforms without telling me you spend all your time on two to three platforms. Instagram, tiktok, twitter, and tumblr are full of people who are promoting all kinds of brands and one of those kinds of brands is sex work.

Those are also all platforms that have age restrictions and behavior standards, and of all of them tumblr is the one that has the history of being the most openly sexual and the least connected to legal identities. People are linking to their diy porn because of the culture of these websites both currently and historically. I once posted a video on this website of me bringing myself to orgasm in a public bathroom stall then inserting a dildo into my vagina before I went on stage and performed a set with my band. I did it for free and for fun five years ago, the week before the porn ban hit.

What I'm saying here is that the culture of this website has a much longer history of openness about sex and sexuality and the visual presentation of sex than it does of being full of people who think teens shouldn't see nipples. This is an *extremely* reasonable place to post information linking to porn that you make and to use cute pictures of yourself to do so.

It's also really easy to tell that these people aren't bots or using stolen images because the whole point of the live platform is that you can click through and go talk to them. Strange Aeons did just that and you can see what happened. (click on that video for a fun cameo at 6:04) Turns out live users are just a bunch of people (not networks stealing images the way that actual porn *bots* on tumblr do) and the ones who are trying to do sex work on the live platform itself get banned.

But also kids too young to see the occasional boob shouldn't be on tumblr! (like, seriously, define kids. what age is too young to see the kinds of images allowed by the tumblr live tos? how about the ones banned by the tumblr live tos? How old should you have to be before someone shows you an ahegao face on a hoodie in public? What should the punishment be for the ahegao fashionistas for exposing six year olds to anime tongues? What should the minimum age be to go on the beach and see men in speedos? Fifteen, or is that still abusive to children? Maybe we should make it twenty to be safe, or better yet why don't we make it twenty AND ban speedos? this is what you sound like, you fucking asshole). Tumblr has age limits and people under that age limit shouldn't be looking at most things on this website. A smiling woman in a bikini top or a dude with his abs out are fucking nothing compared to the kind of damage you personally and specifically are trying to inflict with your shitty ideas.

Posting t&a on tumblr is not at all comparable to doing street level work and soliciting children for a number of reasons, but I'd just like to really take the time to point out that you just compared the profile pics on tumblr live to sexually soliciting a child. You literally did the "x group i hate are pedophiles" thing, which is exactly why it's such a huge problem that any and all types of nudity have been stigmatized online. We have created an entirely new paradigm of "pedophile" that means "existed around a child while wearing tight pants." You are such a fucking clueless, sanctimonious pile of shit that you can't even see that that's what you're doing. This is literally, exactly kink at pride discourse.

And that's even if I grant you that these people are posting t&a! Go look at the live leaderboards, you don't have to accept the ToS to see the leaderboards! We are talking about *at most* saucy pin-up levels of eroticism. I have seen fucking holiday cards with more visible cleavage than any of the top 200 tumblr live streamers right now.

The only thing in your final sentence that makes any sense is that you are positioning tumblr as trash town.

Yeah. I'm actually not at all impressed by tumblr recently and that has a lot more to do with the influx or resurgence of nuance-allergic, anti-sex, whiny shits like you than it does with a banner that i can scroll past in a quarter of a second.

I want people reading this to really, really sit down and think about what they're calling assault or hypersexualiztion or whatever. We are talking about profile pictures. You are so offended by a bar of 4 profile pictures at the top of your dash that you're comparing regular ass humans (some of whom are sex workers and some of whom are just streamers who took thirst trap selfies) to the real life solicitation and abuse of children.

TOUCHING GRASS IS NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU PLEASE GO INTERACT WITH ACTUAL REAL HUMANS WHO DON'T KNOW WHAT DASHCON OR MILKSHAKE DUCK ARE. YOU ARE CRITICALLY INTERNET POISONED AND IF YOU TALKED TO SOMEONE AT THE DMV AND DESCRIBED IT AS ASSAULTING CHILDREN TO HAVE SOMEONE IN A BIKINI ON A BILLBOARD THEY WOULD IMMEDIATELY BEGIN TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET AWAY FROM YOU. THINK OF THIS POST AS THE CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTOR TELLING YOU THAT THE SHADOWS YOU'RE SEEING AREN'T ACTUALLY DEMONS BUT THAT YOU ARE GOING TO REALLY REGRET IT IF YOU DON'T GO OUTSIDE.

[the-nameless-poet]

Picture with Prongs.

Summery : You ask James Potter, who is your boyfriend to help you win in a not so sirius sibling rivalry. Muggleborn!reader.

Pairings : James Potter x reader

You and your sister had a cute sibling rivalry going on between you, where you send the pictures of your adventures every week and decide who had more interesting week than the other.

It was a way for you and your sister to stay bonded and stay updated on everything going on in each other's lives. Even though she's roll her eyes at all the wizard stuff you told her you knew that she'd run up to your room and get comfortable on your bed and ask all the questions about the wizarding world. She was only a minute and a half younger than you, she was practically your bestfriend. You even took James 'round your house to meet your family this summer. And your sister and him had loads of fun teasing you and roasting you about your clumsiness and dramatic attitude.

You loved both of them and seeing them bond like that made you feel not so bad about them teasing you. And then you both decided to set up a double date and you, James, your sister and her boyfriend went to a cute cafè that you both loved and had a really great time.

Coming back to present, you were holding a Polaroid that your sister sent you of her and an extremely adorable golden retriever. To say you envied her was an understatement but to top that so you can win this week's 'adventures of L/N girls' and get your picture in the 'babes through years' photo album. Cause you've been losing since last 4 weeks! And that is unacceptable! Your mum and dad sent you a letter expressing their 'disappointment' about the fact that you've gone down to the boring alley and their 'concern' that you won't ever be back and they'll loose their oldest daughter forever. Oh the blasphemy!!!!

"Hey, bub! What you thinking about, love?" Your thoughts were interrupted by James sitting beside you and kissing your temple.

"Nothing. Just thinking about how I'll top this week's 'adventures of L/N girls'." You let out a loud sigh. And handed him the Polaroid picture.

"Awhh, that's adorable." You smacked the back of his head.

"Sorry...You know you can just send her a picture of you with Hagrid. I'm pretty sure that'll be adventurous enough. Meeting a half giant." He said while serving himself a plate of the dinner served on the gryffindor house table.

"No. I can't. She knows Hagrid. Think something better James!" You smacked his arm this time.

"Stop hitting me, woman! I'm already yours. No need to hit on me." He winked at you.

"Jamie..." You stretched his name with a whine.

"Wingardium laviōsa somebody's arse up and take a picture. I'm sure a flying human will please her." He said nonchalantly and took a bite from his plate.

"Already did." You grumbled. He almost spit his food out.

"When!? Who!?" He exclaimed.

"4th year. Sirius." He let out a loud laugh.

"Oh, darling, I love you so bloody much!" He let out a loud giggle.

"I know it was pretty amazing but that's not the point here. I've gotta out do her this time. She's been winning for past four weeks." You pouted.

"Yeah well, let's just think for a while."

"Think about what?" Sirius asked as him, Remus and Peter sat down.

"She needs an idea to win this week's 'adventures of the L/N girls'" James informed them.

"Oh the pictures are here? Show me." Sirius clapped his hands together.

You gave the picture to him and he awed loudly.

"Alright, it's taking a lot in me to say this but that's the most adorable pup I've ever seen." Sirius gushed over the picture and you just banged your head on the table.

"Yeah, there is no chance you can win this week. Try next time maybe." Remus teased while piling up his plate with chicken and gravy.

"ughhh!" You let out a low groan and stared at nothing in perticular while thinking about how you can win this week. Then an idea suddenly popped into your brain making a light bulb go off.

"I know how I can win this week. Oh I'm such a genius." You wore a pretty smile on your face. You were quite proud of yourself for thinking it.

"Well, care to share it with the class?" James said while taking a bite of his chicken.

"Yeah. You see once my sister told me that she always wanted to get a picture taken while standing next to a deer. When she was a kid she used to love Bambi and she still does. So, my dear Jamie can you please, pretty please take a picture with me." You batted your eyelashes at him while making the best puppy eyes you could.

"No." To say you were shocked was an understatement. James never says no to you.

"Why?" You asked with a heavy frown.

"I'm not some kind of patting zoo animal!" He exclaimed with a blush on his face. You quickly picked up on the fact that he was shy and embarrassed of getting a picture taken in his animagus form.

"Why!?"

"Because it's... Weird... I just don't like the idea of it. Sweetie you know I'd do anything you'd ask me to. But not this. Please." His eyebrows were furrowed.

"But Jamie then I won't win." You said with a big pout and puppy eyes.

"I know doe but just not this one, okay?" He kissed the top of your head.

He didn't want to take a picture in his animagus form because he thought he looked silly. But he didn't know any better. He looked magnificent in his animagus form. A stag. With huge antlers and a beautiful face. He was perfect. And all you had to do was make him realise that. But how?

Anyways that night you were head bent on convincing him. So you did what you know how to do best. Seduce him. And let's just say you were pretty persuasive. (He made you promise a week full of blow jobs. And then he finally said yes.)

So the next day you put on a cute summer dress and set up a picnic blanket with empty basket as a set up and the marauders followed you into the dark forest.

After you reached the dark forest, James turned into his animagus form and stood clueless in the middle of the forest. When Peter tried to get a picture of just prongs he stuck his tongue out but it still turned out to be an adorable picture.

Next thing you asked Peter to take multiple pictures with you standing beside Prongs. One where you were admiring his antlers. Another one where you pat his head. One where you planted a kiss right between his two doe-eyes. James was loving this. The affection he was getting, the closeness he felt. The warmth of your hand caressing his coat. The last picture was with you feeding an apple to Prongs. But then Sirius wanted to join this picture party.

So you took a picture with a black dog smothering you in kisses and a very jealous looking pissed off stag. And another one with you standing in the middle of Padfoot and Prongs and Wormtail sitting on top of your head. Remus took that picture. Every single one of them was adorable. After you were done you went back to the castle and went to the kitchen to pick up some snacks. You owled all your pictures and joined your boyfriend on the couch infront of the fire place and cuddled in his side.

"You know guys, today I realised that you guys are the coolest and most adventurous things I have in my life. And I just feel so happy about it." James smiled down at you and gave you a long peck. And Sirius came jumping beside you and joined yours and James' cuddle party and soon you found yourself wrapped in a blanket with four amazing gentlemen. And you felt like the luckiest girl in the whole fucking world.

And ofcource you won 'the adventures of L/N girls' that week.

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Could I request March 7th, Ei, Furina, and Navia with a partner who makes plushies?

(H:SR/Genshin Impact) March 7th, Ei, Furina, and Navia's S/O making a plushie of them

I wish for a marketable plushie of Navia.

March almost squeals when she sees a tiny, soft version of herself resting on her bed.

And judging by S/O's proud smile, they were the creator.

(March 7th) "S/O, did you make this?! It's SOOO cute!"

(S/O) "I tried hard to capture your essence. Think I did a good job?"

(March 7th) "It's PERFECT! Come on, take a picture of me holding the plush!"

She absolutely loves the plush. Every night she sleeps, March hugs onto it tightly.

Even forgoing hugging S/O in favor of holding their very cute plushie, much to their dismay.

Ei smiles a little when she sees the plushie of herself that S/O brought in.

Unlike most items depicting herself, this plushie was also smiling, and admittedly did look quite cute.

Ei could tell it was handcrafted, which meant even more to her.

(S/O) "What do you think?"

(Ei) "It is the most interesting take I've seen thus far. Do you plan on producing this for the rest of Inazuma?"

(S/O) "Nope! It's only for you."

Ei chuckles, gently picking the plush up and admiring the detail.

(Ei) "Then I shall treasure it for eternity."

Furina looked extremely pleased at the sight of looking at a miniaturized version of herself.

S/O had even managed to capture her smug personality, and different blue eyes.

(Furina) "Hm, a fine job you have done, S/O!"

(S/O) "If it could talk and brag about itself, then I'd call it a 100% recreation."

(Furina) "I'll have you know, I can do a much better job than some plush telling people how amazing I am! After all, you are here with me because of it!"

(S/O) "Hah, right."

Truth be told, she absolutely adores it. She takes care of the plush and makes sure there is no dust on it zealously.

Not that she'd tell S/O that, lest they tease her relentlessly for it.

Navia gasps as she suddenly snatches the plushie of herself, her smile growing bigger with every second.

(Navia) "How long did this take to make?! It's incredible!"

(S/O) "Oh man, the details of your dress and hair wasn't easy, I'll say that much-"

Navia puts the plushie down before grabbing their cheeks, and pulling them into a strong kiss.

After pulling back, S/O was stunned.

(Navia) "Thank you for such an amazing gift! I demand a plushie of yourself to go with mine this instant!"

Navia keeps the plushes of herself and S/O always close together in her room.

They were kept in a fancy glass case to ensure no dust got into them, just for the extra mile.

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

Saw this meme and iiiiii did a thing... a steddie thing... obviously

( Eddie has a small dick in this if you don't like it don't read it. We support small dick supremacy in this house thank you for your time. 😊 )

😅😅😅

I'm picturing them at a bar. I wanna say maybe Steve is the bar tender, and he's been seeing Eddie around. He comes in. Talks a little, he's kinda quiet. Like he's stuck in his head, like he comes there to think. He's always scribbling things on napkins. Steve thinks they might be song lyrics, the way Eddie hums and taps his fingers as he writes.

But Steve obviously sees him looking at him sometimes. It's a gay bar, it happens, but Eddie doesn't leer at him, or chat him up in that way. It's always just friendly conversation.

Steve kind of loves it. Loves being able to just chat and not worry about getting stalked out to his car by a creep. And then one day some drunk dude is hitting on Eddie HARD. Leaning into him and grabbing at his arm and just when Steve is about to say something the guy actually says the words,

"how big is that dick?" Like... in real life. Out loud. And grabs for Eddie's thigh, and Steve watches Eddie catch his wrist, easy, watches him shove the guys hand back at him, saying,

"small. Leave me alone." Without even looking at him. And Steve fucking barks a laugh because that was... fucking hilarious. But also... kinda hot. Like, he's known he likes Eddie for awhile but seeing someone come on to him had sealed the deal, jealousy crawling over his skin, but then seeing Eddie shut it down, in the funniest fucking way Steve had ever seen, had just slammed it into place.

The guy scowls, says something rude, and stalks off. But Eddie is looking at Steve cuz he's still chuckling. Doing that cough thing like he's trying to cover it up but the laugh is still extremely prominent through the coughing. And Eddie watches him with raised eyebrows cuz like... damn okay. Cute bar tender thinks he's funny. And Steve is like,

"Sorry man. That was just, fuckin hilarious. Not the guy grabbing you, obviously, just, how you delt with it. Like that was... the best thing I've seen in awhile. Just... just sayin." He shakes his head to stop himself rambling more, he needs more friends to hangout with besides Robin, she's rubbing off on him. So he just reaches into the cooler and grabs Eddie his usual beer, slides it over the bartop to him, tells him it's on the house.

"Thanks." Is all Eddie says, but he looks happy, small smile still on his face.

And when the bar's closing, and Eddie is still there, just idly talking to Steve all night. Steve takes a chance. Says some cheesey line about letting Eddie walk him home. And Eddie flushes red to his ears but nods, takes the last sip of his beer and helps Steve flip the chairs onto the tables so he can do a quick sweep. Steve's locking the door when he hears Eddie clear his throat awkwardly, like he wants to say something. Steve looks at him, waits.

"I uh... look I know you thought I was being funny... earlier." Eddie scratches his head, nods into the bar. Steve nods, lets him continue.

"But I uh- I was also being serious?" He grimaces, eyes on the ground.

"So if that's like... a deal breaker? That's- that's totally okay. I just uh... I dont know. Thought I should maybe warn you before- before anything...happens?" His eyes widen and he takes a step back.

"Not that anything was gonna happen! Like I wasn't expecting... THAT. I just... oh my god I don't know. People can be assholes about small dicks so I just wanted to be up-front about it in case you thought I was kidding when I told that guy that. Cuz I was being serious and I'm gonna stop talking. Jesus christ." He breathes the last part, shaking his head at himself, his face twisted in what looks like pain. Steve thinks he's fucking adorable.

He steps closer, puts his hands on Eddie's hips and pushes him gently against the brickwall of the bar. Rests his head against Eddie's as he laughs a little, Steve's fingers pressing into his hips tickling a bit.

"I don't care. Honestly I uh..." he pauses, pulls back to look at Eddie, his eyes are wide, his cheeks are a deep pink now.

"I was kinda hopin you weren't kidding." Steve tilts his head, smirks at Eddie, just a little. A light smirk. Not the full thing, doesn't wanna overwhelme him. Yet. Eddie sucks in air, blinks at him.

"Oh. Yeah?" He asks, his voice breathy, pitched higher than usual. Steve nods, sinks his teeth into his lip, and brushes his nose against Eddie's.

"Yeah. Still wanna walk me home?" Steve asks, staying close. Eddie nods, his hands moving to Steve's shoulders.

"Yeah. Yes absolutely. I'd love that. I'd love too." He rambles, swallowing hard.

And Steve can't help himself anymore, ducks forward and presses a soft kiss to his lips. Eddie makes a little sound in his throat and Steve fucking adores it. Already in so deep for this guy. But it's been months. Eddie's not a new thing in his life. Just, this part of it is new.

Eddie blinks at him when he pulls back, steps away from Eddie but holds out his hand. Eddie smiles, reaches out and takes it, lets Steve drag him away from the wall and down the sidewalk. Their fingers laced together, hands swaying between them as they walk through the dark.

[bitchlesshazard69]

I don't ever make posts, but I'm a huge Mystreet fan. Ever since the recent vidcon, I've had thoughts about the new animation style that wants to take up Mystreet. This must be a very controversial thought, and I will try and remain respectful in this post about why Aphmau should discontinue this style of animation and why it is such a hazard for the show's gain.

Being this an indie series, I know animation can be tough, but there seems to be very easy steps to prevent this mess up. I have noticed the new bodies the females have in the new animation style and I can say for certain that they are very awkward. There was no complaints on the old style, (preferred style) at all, yet Jess has decided to update them anyways. A fully animated direction might've not been so bad or made such a big difference if the animation wasn't entirely awkward; not just the animation; yet for the females.

The male designs haven't changed much, but tell me why the decision to give the woman curves, heavy blush and boobs was necessary. There are many flaws to the new female bodies, as they cookie cut all of the female characters into this short, tiny limbed person with boobs and awkward proportions. I know this is her channel's new animation style, yes, but these aspects feel so drawn to a simple minded audience. Even if it's supposed to be a show targeted for children, will it be an excuse.

In the first image with teen Aaron and Aphmau, we can see the new animation isn't so bad for the males as it is for the woman. Aphmau looks high.

In Katelyn's image next to a Christmas tree, do we have the awkward body that Katelyn was given. The females constantly have blush on their faces as well as large eyes, and the portions of their body get awkward to fit this female stereotype.

The kawaii~chan image has to be one of the most awkward shots. This shot really brings out why it's a bad choice. They may seem cute to Jess, but she hasn't seen the flaw of how it would be hard to ever do serious scenes with this new style. The old style was cute as well as fit to suite every mood, and there was no need to change it. If it ain't broke don't fix it.

Another shot with Aphmau and Aaron in the sky. The "realistic" woman proportions next to the Minecraft body of Aaron is extremely awkward and out of control. Katelyn in her swimsuit in the next shot is much worse.

Animation is hard, and there could be so much passion into this, yet it doesn't cover up how sexist the new bodies are for the females. The next image with Ivy and her crew explains that all so well. Jess would probably never read this, but I hope she takes the time to consider these changes can only do the worst for the show. The proportions look awkward with Minecraft and even downright inappropriate. Seriously, no one asked for all females to get downsized to short with boobs and thick thighs. Not a single soul. Everyone would be fine with the old style coming back, and I feel if others speak about it enough, we'll be listened too about these changes.

It feels like a shameless sexualization/stereotype to our beloved female characters and in no way did they need this. If the animation style MUST stay, then at least do us this and make all the bodies the same, leveled, equal blocky character as the Minecraft gods intended them to be. The males look practically fine.

The last picture shows the men and how the animation style actually could work out(Opinion wise, I will always prefer the old style of how things worked) but if Jess wants an animated series, that is completely fine. It would make a huge difference to bring back their old body shapes.

It is such a strong change, that it could end up ruining the show completely for other people. I wouldn't be surprised if people got offended over how the new woman bodies are "stylized". Seriously, this doesn't need to be.

[tendermiasma]

On my regular binge of clover because I just viscerally love him, (I wish there was a different word but really that's the best description) and was thinking about the thought someone else had on submission, but sheep and guardian dog but just I had a slightly different thought:

I have a dog, I love her to bits, but she's a very anxious pup. She's pure border collie, so she's brilliant, but she's almost debilitatingly anxious and she's a TINY border collie, only just 20 lbs. But her favourite "person" in the world is my cousin's dog, who is the biggest great piranese I've ever seen and she's a genuine farm dog so she has the "aura" of "I kill shit". They're so cute together and my pup's favourite place is under her big friend when inspecting the person at the front door or cuddled up to her napping and they just make me think of clover and Halsin.

Sorry this is rather illegible and not really a question more a statement.

Oh gosh thank you! I have little to add because this is very much an accurate picture of them and you've struck the nail on the head for Clover in ways that I hoped I was getting across. He has a great depth of knowledge and ability whose particular flavor isn't going to be replicated in libraries and the life experience through which he acquired it did enough damage to often overshadow it, especially in more low-stress situations. When he's taken out of situations where the anxiety and hyperwareness has precedent and needs to be directed everwhere at once, it still bleeds all over with nothing to act on and without his particular abilities to shine. Halsin has big dog energy and his warm personality is perfect, and something that needs to be acknowledged more is that he's massive and can be extremely unfunny as soon as something truly bothers him. He wears his heart on his sleeve.

[bizarrelittlemew]

okay. i just watched the movie Snakeskin (2001). i bought a physical dvd in the year of our lord 2024 because Taika has 6.5 minutes of screentime in it. and now i'm sitting here trying to process wtf i just watched asjdhfdjsk so here are the highlights (thank you Meow @blakbonnet for going through this experience with me)

first of all, enjoy these screenshots from the trailer (i'm still not sure if they're mandatory disclaimers?):

...but say yes to snake imagery, because there will be a lot of it

we are definitely in 2001. this is extremely apparent throughout the whole movie. but especially from this girl's hair

Taika's character (Nelson) and his girlfriend (Daisy, pictured above) drive around in a repurposed ice cream truck and sell drugs btw. it's called Mr. Trippy.

main character Alice (Melanie Lynskey) is a huge fan of ✨America✨. her best friend is in love with her but she only wants Bad Boys. also said friend's name is Johnny but it's actually Craig

ALSO Craig-slash-Johnny is played by Dean O'Gorman (Fili)??!?!?!?

their hobby is to drive around picking up hitchhikers but only those who look not boring

enter The American. this guy is the most American you have ever seen. americans wish they could be as American as this guy. no one else has ever Americaned harder.

as you can see, i'm not lying. he even says "howdy ma'am" so we're convinced he is a real American

three skinheads are after The American because he stole their drugs (i think). he also stole drugs from Nelson and Daisy, who now owe money and/or drugs to their boss, who also has beef with The American for reasons i'm still not totally sure of

The American not only steals drugs and money, he also has a real gun(!!!) and fucks pretty much everyone?

"darlin'. u gotta earn the raaaiht. ter wear snakeskins 😎"

oh my god the sunglasses emoji just reminded me of the fucking sunglasses oh no i'm not sure i can do this akjsdhjsk this will make sense later i promise

do not learn gun safety from this movie

at one point, there is a whole lotta sheep. we are, after all, in Aotearoa New Zealand. and ok this had the cutest moment of Taika yelling "SHEEPY" out of a car

there's a scene where uhm. uhhh no not gonna describe this i think but. yeah fair warning this movie has some period-typical homophobia let's just say 💀 this is the live reaction:

MOVING ON

if you enjoy the 2000s aesthetic of "look how edgy we are doing drugs" *colorful-haired people on couches in dark club* *echo-y laugh* *hallucinations* *it's mushrooms look it's mushrooms we're doing psychedelics* then this is the movie for you my friend

oh and Alice also did acid at some point while being very "i've totally done drugs before" about it (((doubt)))

GIRL GET UP FROM THAT DIRTY BATHROOM FLOOR

[New Zealand accent] "wow. six and acid." yes she is living all her american dreams as you can see

by nighttime, all three cars (main characters, mr. trippy, and the nazimobile) and the motorcycle (mr. drug boss) have made it pretty far up the mountain, it seems. cute moment between mr. drug boss and nelson. look how :D he is!

but you know a movie with Taika in it needs to have a father figure talk down to him so he gets very 🥺 right after this

lots of shit goes down (i won't spoil too much if by any chance you still want to watch this) and it turns out that the older skinhead guy is the best actor in the movie??

and NOW things get weird

Craig and The American have so much beef by now that they decide to solve it by russian roulette

Alice's reaction to this is something like "ugh, you guys are crazy, i can't watch this 🙄"

like she just walks away?? GIRL THEY'RE AIMING A REAL GUN AT EACH OTHER

she keeps COMPLETELY UNDERREACTING TO WHAT IS HAPPENING like (spoilers from now on) CRAIG IS SHOT AND KILLED and she doesn't even run over and she doesn't even say anything to The American?? WHO SHOT HIM???? he's just standing there??

and then. AND THEN.

ok this is where i fully lost it for several minutes and missed half the following scene. i was fucking HOWLING like actually crying with laughter, i couldn't see or breathe and my partner got worried ksjdhfdjsk ok so here's what happens

they're in the car. craig is obviously very dead. alice is kinda in denial i guess. The American tells her to shut his eyes and she's like why? BECAUSE HE DEAD GIRL!! but she doesn't, she doesn't shut his eyes, no, this is what she does instead

I COULD BARELY MAKE THIS GIF BECAUSE I KEPT LAUGHING TO THE POINT OF TEARS

NOT THE SUNGLASSES ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. THE UNTAPPED MEME POTENTIAL HERE IS FUCKING RIDICULOUS

ANYWAY shortly after this we hear one of the funniest lines in the movie (and it's not even about the shooting and killing of Craig):

"fuck, Seth! this isn't fucking America, you can't just go around shooting everybody!"

oh yeah The American does have a name and it's Seth

i'll just post a few chat screenshots for the next part because i can't really describe it, i promise we're almost at the end

after some incredible visual effects™️, we end with Return of the Sunglasses (and me scaring my cats away because i was sobbing again)

i haven't even really talked about Taika's scenes much (the reason i watched this in the first place) because the ending took me OUT and honestly he is maybe the most normal person in this whole movie. one review (from the trailer) wrote this:

and yeah that may honestly be the best way to describe it. 10/10 movie watching experience, highly recommend. thank you for coming to my snek talk

[icarustypicalfall]

HEAD CANONS!!

how cod men would use their phones

this is my first time doing head canons lmao if its bad just forget it 😭 i tried to be realistic but that was extremely dump lmaoo

warnings: none, totally sfw and maybe funny? 😀

captain john price

honestly, i see him as the type of people who'll lecture you when they see you using a phone, while he plays candy crush and similar games on a loop when he's alone. he isn't much interested in social media, maybe he'll use Twitter for infos and What's up to talk with his team. Otherwise, he'd be a Facebook dad watching videos with that annoying laugh on full volume while cackling. Gaz tried to  convince him to use other platforms but it resulted in Price giving him a 10 minutes lecture on how bad social media is.

(john secretly watch tiktok video complications on YouTube)

simon ghost riley

he doesn't use his phone much, he knows how it can be addicting and he has much things on his mind to worry about being social with others. although, he looks for dad jokes and have a laugh at them when he's alone. his camera roll is full of blurry pictures he took by mistake and screenshots of recipes.

kyle gaz garrick

he's the youngest and the one who convinced price into buying a phone. i think Kyle is the the type of people who'd be popular on every platform, twitter, Instagram, you name it. he's funny (also really handsome 🤭) which makes it easy for him to have much moots and friends. He watches streams or horror stories at 2 am. (spoiler: he got scared more than once)

johnny soap Mactavish

he watches shitty shows on Netflix to complain about them. he loves, and i mean really loves annoying people with stupid meaningless Messages when he's bored. if you are texting him, god be with you, this man makes 20 typos in a single word. he'd make comments on random posts to fight people for months.

"jus fer fun lass/lad"

(sorry if this isn't how Scottish people actually talk I've seen it around in fics 😭)

he looses arguments most of the time and asks Alejandro for some back up.

Alejandro vargas

he uses his phone to call only, he despises texting and if he did, it'll be like this

you:"when shall i meet you tomorrow?"

Alejandro:"9"

you:"pm?"

Alejandro:"👍🏻"

although, he takes lots of pictures, sends them to you most of the time. rudy forced him to make an Instagram account and he ended by liking it.

rudy parra

this cute man 🤭💕 he might be a military man, but he has a soft spot for cute videos of pepole taking care of animals. he'd watch them for hours. he doesn't use his phone much due to his job but he's keeps up with the trends and explains them to you if you're confused.

i can see him using this one a lot :3

Phillip graves

he hates social media, he uses what's up to send to his shadows shirtless pictures of him. he'd drop the most heart wrenching pic ever and say"what's for dinner" (you sir 🤭)

he secretly loves watching those videos of reddit stories, he knows it's probably fake but he lives for the drama and enjoys it.

-fin-

i hope y'all like it, it's shitty and short lmao.

i Just got up from a nap lmao can't believe people actually liked my other work

shall i do other operaters from like Kor-Tac and ghosts? (and yes i know König is in Kor-Tac)

*just realized I didn't add tags im

✨d u m p ✨*

[666writingcafe]

666WritingCafe's Fall 2024 Menu (NSFW)

I was looking through the stuff I had saved in my drafts, found two prompt lists by the users listed below, and decided to try something new(ish).

So, you know how a lot of retail stores usually have most (if not all) of their fall/Halloween items by the end of August? It may not be out on the floor yet, but it's certainly sitting in the back, waiting to get stocked. Anyway, similar concept here: consider this the start of Smutober/Kinktober on my side of Tumblr.com.

The "Premade" prompts have characters linked to them already. Singles have one character, and entrees have two or three. Prompts considered "Create-Your-Own-Meals" do not have characters attached to them (as of yet).

"Orders" can be made via requests. You can add "sides" (IE: specific kinks) to your "order".

Hopefully I can also resume the Obey Me rewrites soon and have this in conjunction to that, but we'll see what happens with work and life in general.

Without further ado, the "menu" is listed below the cut.

Prompts from @writinginstardust and @dumplingsjinson

Premade Singles (Part One)

“Come over here and make me.” Barbatos Order #1 (8/27/24)

“Wait a minute. Are you jealous?” Thirteen

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.” Satan

“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.” Lucifer

“You heard me. Take. It. Off.” Solomon

“You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.” Belphie

"You were put on this earth to give me a headache." Mammon

“There is no way this much stupid can fit inside one person.” Asmo

“Uh, am I interrupting?” Diavolo

“Don’t be shy now; sit on my face.” Simeon

“If I ask you to kiss me in front of all these people, will you do it?” Levi

“I've never wanted to fuck someone as badly as i want to fuck you right now.” Beel

“I'm going to fuck you until you forget that asshole's name.” Mephistopheles

~~~

Premade Singles (Part Two)

“If you keep looking at me like that we won’t make it to a bed.” Satan

“Did I stutter?” Thirteen

“Stop being a fucking prick.” Barbatos

“I’m not wearing any underwear. Thought you’d like to know.” Mammon

“You sent me pictures of you naked while I was in a work meeting!” Solomon

“I want to taste you.” Simeon

“If we weren’t in public right now, I’d have my head between your legs.” Diavolo

“Don’t cover your face; I want to see you.” Belphie

“Bend over the desk, love.” Mephistopheles

“I’ve never seen anyone look so cute and ridiculous at the same time.” Levi

“Do you think of me when you touch yourself?” Beel

“Touch yourself for me.” Asmo

“Do you want to see what I'm wearing underneath all this?" Lucifer

~~~

Premade Singles (Part Three)

“Do you know how beautiful you are? It’s truly distracting.” Lucifer

“Could he make you feel as good as I do?” Simeon

“Are you trying to turn me on, or are you really just that oblivious?” Barbatos

“I haven’t even touched you and you’re already this wet.” Satan

“Were you just masturbating?” “U-uh..no, I was just..” “Want some help?” Solomon

“I’m not sharing you with anybody. You’re mine, and mine only, and I’m going to make you remember that.” Diavolo

“That’s sweet and all but do they touch you the way I touch you? Fuck you the way I fuck you? Mm, yeah, didn’t think so.” Belphie

“Gonna fuck you until the only word you remember is my name.” Asmo

“Wanna see how you look when you come undone under me.” Thirteen

“I want you in all the ways you’ll let me have you.” Mephistopheles

“Oh, I can think of many ways to shut you up right now.” Beel

“Where do you want me to touch you?” “I don’t know and I don’t care — I just want your hands on me. Please.” Mammon

“So… You touch yourself to the thought of me? I’d like to see that in action.” Levi

~~~

Premade Entrees (Part One)

“Now, why don’t we teach you a lesson?” Thirteen and Beel

“I wanna taste you on my lips again.” Satan and Solomon

“Rough or gentle?” Mammon and Simeon

“You’re really messing with my head here.” Levi and Lucifer

“Fuck, just touch me already! Just— just do something!” “Not so fast. We’ve still got the whole night/day ahead of us.” Barbatos and Asmo

“Clothes on or clothes off?” Diavolo, Mephistopheles, and Belphie

~~~

Premade Entrees (Part Two)

“How about we put that pretty mouth of yours into good use, hm?” Mephistopheles and Belphie

“Aren’t you desperate?” Lucifer and Thirteen

“Patience, love. We’re getting there.” Solomon and Levi

“Look at your reflection. Look at how gorgeous you are. So fucking gorgeous when we're fucking you like this." "So pretty for us, and only for us.” Beel and Satan Order #3 (9/4/2024)

"You want to come?” “Y-yes, I— please—” “Hm, but do you really deserve to?” Diavolo and Asmo

“You like that, don’t you?” Mammon, Simeon, and Barbatos

~~~

Premade Entrees (Part Three)

“Let’s make your thoughts a reality, yeah?” Mephistopheles and Solomon

“Imagine how amazing you’d sound when we're fucking you senseless.” Thirteen and Diavolo

“We’ll fuck you so good, I promise.” Belphie and Asmo

“You’ve got us all hot and bothered.” Levi and Mammon

“Always so needy for us, aren’t you? Can’t help yourself, can you?” Beel and Lucifer Order #7 (10/7/2024)

“Behave.” Simeon, Barbatos, and Satan

~~~

Create-Your-Own-Meal

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“Stop fucking teasing me/us and get to it already.” Order #2 (8/28/2024)

“Oh, the things I’d do to you if we were alone right now…”

“Th-There are people outside this door—” “Well, this isn’t about them, is it?” 

“Look at you, squirming under me, all flushed and pretty looking. Can’t even take a little teasing, can you?” Order #8 (10/7/2024)

“Yeah, but they don’t fuck you the way you deserved to be fucked, do they?” Order #9 (10/21/2024)

“Might I remind you that these walls aren’t sound proof.” 

“Need me to remind you on what happened last night?” 

“Oh, sensitive there, aren’t we?” 

“But you think about me when they’re fucking you, don’t you?” “I… That’s not true.” 

“Lift your hips up for me.”

“Fuck, you’re so hot when you’re bossy.”

“Look at you, coming undone before I’ve even started touching you.” 

“Stop glaring at me like you don’t enjoy me teasing you.”

“I want to be the one fucking you this time.” 

“Sweetheart, you’re so responsive to my touch.”

“And I think you’d look fucking hot when you’re on top of me.” 

“Just sit on my fucking face already.” 

“S-Stop leaving marks on my neck. I have a presentation first thing in the morning.” “Then I get to leave marks anywhere below the neck?”

“You only get to watch.” “B-but—” “No buts, sweetheart.” 

“I’d fuck you right here, right now, if I could.” 

“Turn around.” 

“Eyes on me at all times, sweetheart.”

“I wanna eat you out so fucking bad.” “Then why don’t you?” Order #10 (10/23/2024)

“Spread your legs for me.” … “Spread them wider.” 

“I’ll be honest: I get off to the thought of you.” (Personal) Order #11 11/5/2024)

“I want you in the most sinful ways possible.” Order #5 (9/18/2024) + Order #6 (9/27/2024)

“Aww, how eager can you get?” 

“I want you to touch me like I’m the only thing you could ever want.” 

“You like messing with my head, don’t you?” “Only because it clearly turns you on.” Order #4 (9/13/2024)

“Shit, I’m so fucking hooked on you it’s not even funny.”

“You’d sound so good begging for it.”

“Don’t make too many noises or we’ll get caught.” “That’s part of the thrill.”

“I don’t care, I just need these clothes off so I can fully feel you against me.” 

~~~

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @budbuddnbuddy