#I've never heard of her

[thatiranianphantom]

The solution seems so incredibly simple that they all spend more than a few minutes mentally kicking themselves for not thinking of it sooner.

Particularly Bess, the self-proclaimed #1 Nace shipper in the world (the description makes both Nancy and Ace cringe.)

It wouldn't even take magic that advanced, Bess and Addy assure them. It's not a break, and Temperance was clear about wanting to torture Nancy and Ace in specific, not the rest of them.

(George mumbles under her breath about how the neverending pining and longing glances were absolutely torture for her, and how "that bitch cursed all five of us".)

Nancy and Ace both struggle to believe it could be so simple. That the agony that they both experienced in those five weeks could have easily been undone.

But evidently, it could have been. Temperance was vague about the parameters surrounding the curse, and according to Bess, "a vague disclaimer is nobody's friend."

So they don't break the curse, in specific. In the millionth example of Nancy's friends coming through for her, they agree to shoulder the burden.

And with what does turn out to be a relatively simple ritual, the curse is transferred between all three of them. Now, a death curse links Ace with George, Bess and Nick.

And that should be enough, but that Nick, ever the responsible one, insists they can't let Nancy and Ace go (they'd been edging towards the door, slowly walking closer and closer together with every step) without testing if they've been successful.

This time, however, the vagueness surrounding the curse parameters absolutely do not work for the crew.

Gestures and words were, by Nancy and Ace's testings, not included within the curse. But physical actions were.

"The curse was active when Nancy and Ace went to kiss. So that means...we need to replicate that scenario in order to test if it's active on us," Bess explains, though the eagerness that before surrounded the ritual is distinctively gone from her tone.

"Couldn't Nancy and I just kiss again to test if the curse is off us?" Ace offers, and Bess looks sorely tempted before shaking her head.

"That'd show us if the curse is off you two, but not if it's been transferred to us. No, we have perform....a physical gesture of love with Ace." Now, there is an unmistakeable note of disgust in Bess' tone.

(And again, Nancy is endlessly grateful for her friends, because absolutely nobody looks enthused about this but they step forward anyway.)

They line up three glass bottles fished from the recycling on the mantle, insurance, a warning singal.

Characteristically, Nick offers to go first. Get it over with, he says. He slides into Ace with a hesitance that is so entertaining that Nancy covers her mouth to stifle the giggles. Nick clears his throat at least six times in the thirty seconds it takes to be face-to-face with Ace. He seems not to know what to do with his hands, his fists opening and closing, but settles on putting his hands on Ace's shoulders.

"Like a football huddle, just like a football huddle," they hear him mutter under his breath. With great hesitance, he presses his forehead against Ace's and goes in for the kiss when the first bottle shatters.

Nick jumps back instantly, much farther than was probably necessary.

"Well," he says, clapping Ace on the shoulder. "Better to have loved and lost, I guess. Bess, your turn."

"Yes, I suppose it is," Bess groans. She tiptoes up to Ace, keeping her legs a great distance away and leaning her upper body in slightly.

Nancy can see her shake her head, hear her whisper "do it for the Nace account. Do it for the people of Twitter." She can see Bess fight a shiver as she leans in towards Ace, such that they may as well be kissing from different zip codes. Bess' eyes are squeezed tightly closed and her lips are puckered when the bottle finally shatters."

"Oh, thank god," she gasps, jumping back.

("This is such an ego boost," Nancy hears Ace murmur under his breath.)

"And that just leaves..."

George lets out a very extended groan as she reluctantly stands. The room they're using at Icarus Hall isn't huge, and Nancy has seen George move quickly, but somehow it takes her at least three minutes to cross the room and stand within 100 feet of Ace.

"George. Pleasure to finally see you," Ace grins, and she fixes him with a glare.

"You know what? Maybe I can handle a bit more pining."

"George," Bess warns.

"Fine." She inches in closer, bit by bit, somehow managing to get half her body closer while the other half moves further away. Her whole face is puckered in disgust, and Nancy can see her holding her breath as she gets close enough to Ace to kiss.

"This has gotta be close enough for a freaking death curse," she mutters under her breath, but evidently, it is not, because the bottle remains uncracked.

Nancy has seen George approach a sea spirit with more enthusiasm, but she finally gets close enough that she is a breath away from Ace, and mercifully, the bottle shatters.

She leaps away in an instant, wiping her face.

"Oh my god, lips of Ace," she gasps. "I need a palate cleanser. I need..."

George looks around frantically, before her gaze falls on Nick. Determined, she strides up to him and pulls him into a passionate kiss, with more tongue than was probably needed among company.

The kiss seems to go on and on, but George looks significantly calmer after, and nobody misses the look that passes between her and Nick after.

"Better?" Nick whispers, his gaze on George. She nods, a small smile quirking at her lips and a pregnant moment passes between them.

It's broken by a low whistle. "Soo..." Ace starts.

"This was...great. Really flattering. Super ego boost."

"And we both just...really appreciate the...support," Nancy cuts in. "Looks like a...really successful curse transfer. Top notch. But, uh, if nobody minds, we have a broken curse to celebrate, so we're gonna..."

She waves a hand vaguely in the direction of the door which she and Ace are rapidly stepping towards, and a few seconds later, they're gone.

Another long moment passes before George breaks it. "Do you think Nancy realizes this is her house?"

Nick casts a look out the window. "Or Ace realizes he's our ride?"

[mercifultehlu]

Hello. Hi. Hey. I come bearing moicy fics.

So. I pretty much did Nanowrimo in October (by accident) for this intensely plot heavy spooky fic about these pretend lesbians (mind the rating, it's E for Every reason tumblr hates). I blame the moicy brainrot, this one Halloween lecture I had in uni that taught me way too much about fictional physiology, and the existential dread of the inky blackness of space, and there's your summary packed full of spoilers (if you squint hard enough to close your eyes). It's finished now, and it's cool, I promise, said the completely unbiased author.

Regards,

Polymorphic

If E fics intimidate you (same tbh), then I also have a moicy fic that shoves the hc they were exes into current canon (they only touch through angsty osmosis). Writing this one healed my delusional soul. 

Thank you for your consideration, 

Dear Shadow

[virsancte]

this took... much longer than i thought. but regardless, there's a baby valentine on the way!

[vaguely-concerned]

are. are you telling me that if the romanced mage warden dies and alistair is king, he deadass stares greagoir down over her dead body and grants the circle of ferelden its autonomy after ordering it rebuilt somewhere safer. first you have to deliberately leave him behind so he won't die for you and then he does that for you once you're gone, even when you're broken up??? absolute and literal king behaviour of the highest order????? the actions speak louder than words of it all??????? I think I hauve covid

[trashyshrew]

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

I wonder why lesbians are the only sexuality where a subset of us will have sex but refuse to be touched by our partners. Like. No other sexuality has that, I'm pretty sure.

[ooowyn]

return of the starwars disease

[essektheylyss]

You know what's hilarious, if Ludinus was indeed a young man being traumatized by the end of the Calamity. Deirta Thelyss is almost certainly older than he is.

This is not relevant but I think Essek should bring this up, just to be a bitch about it.

[unimatrixzero1]

"Freeing yourself from me and... me freeing myself from you, they're the same."

[natcat5]

Newest Game Changer Spoiler-free Summary

Ify: >:3c Siobhan: *froths Britishly*

[leupagus]

Every once in a while I remember that Anna Russell's stand-up about the Ring Cycle is available on YouTube, albeit in a pretty shitty format, and I think that the world can't be all bad.

[benzatthanin]

BETWEEN US Episode 11

[cartoonsbyandie]

World's smartest man :3 in the worst fit you've ever seen

[analogwriting]

Favorite View

Killer x gn!reader (amab) a/n: i wrote this one when i was even MORE slammered so hopefully it aint ass lmfaooo

“Killi! Look at that view!” You ran towards the balcony of your room, opening it and walking outside. 

You were currently on a summer resort island. The ship needed to make repairs and some of them deep repairs, so everyone needed to be off the ship for a few days. Luckily, there were plenty of different resorts on the island, so everyone was nice and spread out. 

You and Killer rented your own room, both of you more than excited to have some time away from the others. They were always constantly at the both of your feet that you didn't have time for each other. And if you happened to, you were sleeping because everyone had exhausted you. 

You felt a pair of strong arms wrap around your middle. “Mm, it's nice. But I think I like this view more,” he mumbled, leaning down to kiss at your neck. You let out a breathy laugh, reaching up to gently touch the side of his face. 

“You're so corny,” you mused. 

You stood there like that for a moment, just enjoying everything. The view of the island in its beautiful summer paradise feel. Everything was beautiful and green. The air was warm, but the breeze that rolled in from the ocean provided a coolness that made the heat bearable. You could stay in this moment forever.

Only someone had a different idea in mind.

You felt Killer sink his teeth into your neck and you gasped in surprise, a breathy moan escaping you. “Right here?” He only grunted in response as he moved his hands, groping your hips roughly and pressing you into the balcony slightly.

You could feel his burning desire through his pants. You wouldn't have been surprised if he was riled up since the both of you entered the room. He had immediately taken off his helmet, so this might've been the goal from the beginning. Being pent up from not having a moment alone was something the both of you were suffering from. 

You felt as quickly undid your pants, pulling out your cock and stroking you. “Cutting right to the chase,” you breathed shakily. You were instant putty in his hands. It didn't help that you had been longing for his touch so much that you're instantly sent into overdrive because of it. You pressed against him, whining softly. 

He pumped your cock and it wasn't long at all before you were sent over the edge, making a mess of both his hand and the fence of the balcony. You were panting, head spinning already. He released you and you leaned over on the railing, trying to catch your breath. 

You felt as he pressed against you and felt just how excited he was. He leaned down pressing a kiss against the crook of your neck. Next thing you knew, your pants were around your ankles. You shivered at the cool breeze that passed through your legs.

“Make sure you're not too loud.” You heard him whisper in your ear. You looked down, seeing some of your own crew mates down below. Fuck, again? “I'm starting to think you're into this kind of thing,” you murmured. 

“There is an extra level of excitement, I suppose,” he said. You felt his hands move towards your ass. He groped it roughly and you bit the inside of your cheek, trying not to be too loud. You weren't sure exactly how easy it would be for the others to hear you, but you weren't about to risk it. 

The last thing you needed was your brother seeing you getting absolutely railed by his best friend. That would be traumatizing for all of you. On the plus side, he hadn’t seemed to be with the ground down below, so that was good.

“I also like watching you squirm and trying not to be too loud,” he said before inserting one of his thick fingers inside of you. Your eyes widened slightly at the sudden intrusion and you choked on a groan. “Fuck,” You muttered, pressing into his hand. 

“I'm almost tempted to tell you to skip the stretching and just fuck me.” You squirmed as he moved the appendage inside of you before inserting another one, causing you to moan a bit louder. You were panting already, head beginning to cloud. 

“As much as I would love that, it's been a while.” It was true, the two of you hadn't really had time to shag. “But I'll be quick.”

You felt as he slipped in a third and you groaned both with impatience and pleasure. “I don't think I'm going to be able to hold out much longer,” you breathed, head spinning faster than a top on a table. You just wanted him inside of you. Now.

Killer only chuckled, clearly amused with your desperation. “You laugh, but I'm sure you're just as-” You cut yourself off with a gaspy whine as he pulled his fingers out. You shivered as you were suddenly left empty.

“You talk a lot for someone who is about to get their shit wrecked.”

You glared at him over your shoulder. “I do not! It's only-” Your eyes widened in surprise as you suddenly felt him shoving himself inside of you. You bent over the railing, completely forgetting that you were outside as you moaned loud enough for it to echo. 

He grabbed you by the back of your jacket, pulling you upright and shoving himself deeper inside. Your eyes rolled backwards and you went slack for a moment. 

“Hey Killer! Hey, y/n! Didn't even see you up there!” Gig was down below with Pomp and Papas. You were glad that the bottom half of the railing was solid instead of barred or you'd be on full display right now. 

“You better get it together or they'll get suspicious,” Killer taunted in your ear. You mustered up enough strength to give a small wave. 

“Yeah,” you choked out. “Enjoying the view!” Your voice was strained from the ungodly guttural moan from just moments ago. You were silently cursing Killer at this point as well. This was just evil, but again, you did moan loud enough for the entire island to hear.

“It really is nice! Are you guys joining us? I think the captain wanted everyone to gather by the tiki bar for a toast.” 

You honestly couldn't even think straight. His words were hardly processing in your mind right now. Having Killer's thick cock stretching out your insides was making it hard to think straight. You could even feel it twitching inside of you. He was raring to go just as much as you were. 

“We'll be down in a bit. There's still a couple things we gotta check off the list before we head that way.” Killer spot up this time and you could hear the strain in his own voice. 

“Sounds good. Don't work yourself too hard, we're supposed to relax!”

“Oh trust me, we will.” 

Finally, the trio down below headed off to where the captain supposedly told everyone to meet up. Killer let go of you and you leaned on the railing, panting heavily. “Holy shit, I didn't think they were going to leave,” you breathed. 

“Do you-” You didn't get a chance to say anything else before Killer began to move inside of you. He didn't start off easy either. He was absolutely letting you have it. At the rate that he was slamming into you, one would think he was never going to see you again after this.

You gripped the railing tightly, head spinning. You did your best to hold back your moans, not wanting to alert anyone else. Hell, you'd look if you could see straight, but your eyes were glued to the back of your head at the moment as he mercilessly pounded into you. 

You were already feeling your legs begin to tingle and grow numb from being bent over the railing in such a way, and the sheer pleasure coursing through your body. You just knew you were going to have some nasty bruises on your hips tomorrow from both Killer's hands and the structure. 

“I told you, you talk a lot,” he grumbled in your ear before biting it. 

“Th-hng…” You were going to try to retort, but absolutely not. The cloud of lust already settled in your brain and no thoughts were present. 

Killer really decided to push your limits as you felt one of his hands wrap around your cock and start pumping. You let out another cry of pleasure, not even caring if anyone heard at this point. It didn't seem the other cared either because only a breathless chuckle came from him. 

Between your breathy moans, Killer’s grunts, and skin against skin echoing around you, you wouldn't be surprised if the whole island knew you were boning at this point. 

“K-Ki-ah!” You felt yourself push over the edge as you came again, making more of a mess on the railing before you. 

You further collapsed into the railing, having no strength left to prop yourself up, but Killer wasn't done using you as his cock sleeve. You felt his hand travel up to your hair and yank you up. You cried out, head spinning with pleasure. You might just die a blissful death at this point. You already felt like you were floating. 

You felt Killer pause his movements and you panted heavily, looking back at him confused. “Lift.” He patted your leg and you did as he commanded, still unsure of what was going on. He slid his hand under your thigh, lifting you. 

You gasped in surprise and felt him do the same with the other. You've never been full nelsoned before but here you were. “Fuck,” You squeaked before he started thrusting up into you. 

Once again, your eyes were glued to the back of your head as you were railed into over and over. You felt him reach even deeper as your legs were spread a bit wider so he could. Hell, you didn't even know you were this flexible. Then you felt the head of his cock ram into that sweet, sweet spot that made you see stars. 

You let out a strangled moan, your legs twitching. You had already been milked for all you had, but you could feel your own cock twitching as you reached euphoria once more. 

And then Killer kept ramming that spot and you swear you saw whatever god people talked about. 

After what felt like eternity, but in all actuality wasn't that long, Killer’s hips stopped as he unloaded inside of you. You let out a long whine as you were filled to the brim, feeling it ooze out a bit. 

Killer was panting, backing up slightly until he found the chair. He sat down, somewhat collapsing in it. As you were suddenly dropped into his lap when he plopped down, he was shoved deeper inside and you saw white for a moment. Your entire body was buzzing with pleasure and all the energy you had was gone. 

The two of you sat there, panting, trying to recover even somewhat. You could already feel the bruises forming on your hips. You just had to make sure to keep everything covered so that no one would freak out. 

You leaned forward, resting your head on the table before looking behind you. 

Killer just grinned as he tried catching his breath. “Mmmm. That is my favorite view,” he cooked, leaning down to kiss you gently. 

Fucking sap.

[frootbyethefoot]

the voiceline in episode 1 where alyx makes zombie noises and tries to trick you... she thinks she's so funny (she is)

[tranquil-slaughterhouse]

can u explain whos Roo

And there's also speculation that's she's Eve in a corrupted form.