#I've had to grow up enough to see the kid me as a kid and only then did I kinda like get it
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For the things we lost au, has there ever been times where Stan tells stories to Dipper to calm him down after a traumatic experience or just before bed or just in general?
I know currently Dipper’s and Stan’s relationship hasn’t gotten to that point yet but I’m curious!
Also what other tricks besides teaching Dipper how to use a gun and stealing does Stan ingrain in Dipper? Does he teach him all the tricks he knew from his days of the street?
And since Dipper’s still growing does Stan teach Dipper how to conserve their money, how to shave, how to barter with people/ being okay with talking with crowds or how to do certain math problems (because Stan has worked on the portal for a long time you can’t tell me that he didn’t pick up some things even if begrudgingly)
Does Stan teach Dipper all of his best Uncle Jokes/funny stories, and despite saying he (Dipper) hates all of them does Dipper secretly appreciate them ever once in a while?
Does Dipper help Stan with stuff too? Like does Dipper learn to read different Alien languages just so he can help Stan read stuff or does he steal a little bit of extra food because he knows if Stan doesn’t get enough for the both of them, all that food will be put towards him sl Dipper gets more to help Stan?
I know that Dipper had helped Stan with his hearing aids but what other things does he do for Stan?
DO DIPPER AND STANLEY EVENTUALLY GET A PIRATE ADVENTURE?! Please say they get a space pirate adventure!!!
Also do both Stan and Dipper pick on some alien languages because with Stanley picking up Spanish and Dipper’s interest in learning new languages I don’t think it would be too much of a stretch for them to learn
wow, HELLO! :) you literally made my entire morning when i had to peel myself out of bed at 5am to make it to my shift, and i've been thinking about these asks like all day. thank you anon!!! thank you for giving me an opportunity to rant about this wonderful, beautiful, tragic au. i'm so glad you're enjoying it!!
first off, yes, 100%. there's actually quite a bit of that in the next chapter. as dipper's walls begin to come down and his anger toward stan slowly but surely ebbs away, so too will stan's walls. in canon, stan doesn't share really any of his childhood (at least from what we see) with the kids until atots. in ttwl, it's implied that stan tells dipper more or less the same story we got in that episode (just minus ford's perspective/part of the story), but he will be sharing a lot more of his backstory, life advice, and stories with dipper as the fic progresses. this will help dipper understand stan's motives and will help move the healing process along for them. a lot, if not most, of dipper's anger toward stan is just resentment for being left in the dark (dipper famously hates not knowing stuff). and stan wants so badly to regain dipper's trust. he also wants to protect him from the things he feels he's failed him on this summer already (read: bill). 100% we will see stan rambling about this or that or this to a traumatized and or terrified dipper just to keep him out of his own head and to reinforce in the kid's head that he has someone beside him that he can trust.
side note: stan (and ford's) struggle will be in trying to maintain the kids' childhood and trying not too force them to grow up too fast. but they aren't perfect people and the circumstances are obviously awful and not conducive to helping maintain the kids' innocence. they'll fail and fuck up and they'll get some things right, too. but i can definitely see stan trying to lighten the mood/share stories as i can see ford taking mabel on light-hearted, low stakes adventures when things with the portal become too intense and her mental health begins to fall by the wayside.
SECOND, there's so many things stan will teach dipper! but, i'm willing to bet that stan didn't exactly take the best care of himself during those years he spent on the road. so there will be a lot of things he will have to learn himself! like, where stan spent weeks and weeks skipping meals because he had to, he can't stand seeing dipper do the same. he won't allow it. he'll have to push himself even harder to make ends meet than he did during those years. he wants better for dipper.
as for the things he teaches dip, i'll just list some of them out. you'll definitely see these things play out in ttwl but this question is fun and it's a fun sneak-peak:
stealing (pickpocketing and petty theft both)
how to put on a half-way decent con (in journal 3, ford mentions having to talk his way into food and shelter, and stan and dipper will 100% have to do the same. i imagine he'll actually catch on pretty quick but he'll absolutely hate doing it.)
how to read a face (i.e. is this person full of shit. everyone knows a good con man can spot a con right back)
how to drive (later)
how to shave DEFINITELY. dipper will start growing a little stache or goatee and stan will practically shove a razor in his direction the second it starts coming in.
how to be a ladies man (they'd have their roadside attraction arc and dip would learn basically that confidence is in himself and not in stan's fake womanizing "skills")
things dipper should be learning in school. stan clearly wasn't at the top of his class but you're right in saying that he learned a lot of things when he was building the portal. and dipper's a curious kid, they'll both seek out ways to help him keep on his education in some shape or form.
life experience/advice/etc. stan has 58 some years of life under his belt and he'll share whatever wisdom he has. can't promise all of it will be good lol
there's definitely more that's slipping my mind at the moment, but yes to all of these. and yes to the horrible uncle jokes. none of that stops. and once dipper starts being able to bear him a bit more, he'll secretly love hearing them. he'll love them for the normalcy they help him feel and because if stan is able to laugh and make jokes then maybe everything will be okay. maybe it's okay for him to laugh too, even if everything is so shitty.
as for reading alien languages, there's actually some plot explanations regarding translators that will be explored next chapter. as a resident guardians of the galaxy fic writer, i know all about writing about sci-fi translators and the like. i'm keeping the same explanation for how translators work in this fic too. meaning, dipper and stan will be able to read most alien languages really soon. though, because i like the idea of stan and dipper being able to speak some of the languages they learned during their time across the portal when they get home, they'll probably still try learning some alien languages without the need for translators. i imagine they'll get home and just start speaking, i don't know, like Galactic Standard with each other and ford will pop in and chime into the conversation without missing a beat and mabel will just be standing there wide-eyed and entirely lost for words.
AND YEAH. dipper will do lots of things for stan! besides the unintentional things that dipper does that he doesn't know about — like giving stan a reason to get up in the morning and filling him with happiness and purpose — he'll do his best to reciprocate favors! like, 100% if dipper noticed stan was skipping meals so he could eat more he'd steal something on the side for stan or lie and say he isn't hungry. they'd also both do little things for each other like steal or buy little trinkets or items the other person might like. stan'll buy dipper a notebook to chronicle their adventures and dipper will steal these chocolates he knows stan likes or a funny little doodad or whatever. maybe a gun or a knife if he's feeling crazy.
dipper will also sacrifice his own sleep a lot in order to take watch. the kid's an insomniac already, and stan is older and needs more sleep to recover from brawls with giant alien creatures or running from the law, so dip will do a lot of selfless things like that for stan. both of these guys tend not to think of themselves much so they'll probably both try to sacrifice stuff equally as much. of course, stan wont really let dipper most of the time.
and, i'm not opposed to a space pirate adventure. inquiring minds want to know more.
#gravity falls#the things we lost#reverse drifting stars au#dipper pines#stan pines#mabel pines#ford pines#answering asks#asks open#anon you are amazing thank you#this is entirely stream of thought so sorry for the ramble
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Took all my courage to respond to the below post on Twitter (after once again deleting it in fear first lmao), but since *this* is the site I'd decided to use as my dumping ground for cringe, it's only fair to post the same here too.
First doodle is one I've posted here before, the other two have been in hiding a while.
huhuhghhhh
#everytime i post my more unconventional headcanon stuff i feel like i'm gonna pass out#i see posts all the time with “get silly with your art!” and like#i'm trying i really am#i'm constantly fighting between “i want to show this stuff off” and “i can't explain this if i tried"#and the thought of doing so to strangers terrifies me#i just have to learn to get over this weird ass fear#i know i've had some nice comments from folks here before so that already helps#but ngl i dread the day i get nasty ones#(this has to be high school bullying related trauma or something)#(i was that “weird kid” growing up)#(i even had one of my own doodles publicly defaced by my peers and i just had to laugh it off hahah 🙃)#uhhh alright enough it's tag time uh#trainer leaf#trainer michael#pokemon xd#pokemon frlg#tales of symphonia#ravinoforre
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Ya know. I spent most of my life with horrible painful soul-crushing social anxiety.
And after about 25 years of continuous hard work, suddenly, people started pointing out - to my utter bafflement - that I had, in fact, achieved my lifelong dream of being charismatic. I'm 29 now; I feel comfortable in most social situations, and it is a very rare person whom I cannot make laugh.
I am, undoubtedly, finally, charismatic.
But do you know what I found?
I found that now that I have an understanding of which social rules serve which functions -- Now that I have an understanding of just how much damage my awkwardness was doing to people, well,
I found that, actually, my awkwardness never really hurt anyone at all. People were just judgmental dicks to me about it.
Now that I have the skill-level to (most of the time) creatively vocalize what is in my head as soon as I think it and without fear, I can confirm once and for all what I had always suspected:
I was worth talking to when I was quiet.
I was worth talking to when I was awkward, and when the words in my head took time and patience to hear, and when most of my jokes didn't land. I was worth talking to the whole time.
So I just... I hope that if you've ever wondered whether you are worth communicating with, the answer is yes. Absolutely yes. Each of us has a soul worth sharing - and if you and I were talking, I would happily wait for you to speak (or communicate in other ways) without condescending, and I would never shame you for that harmless awkwardness that so many people feel the need to violently stomp out.
You are worth talking to. You just are. And you deserve people who will speak to you with kindness, with patience, and with the basic immutable respect owed to all people.
(I talk about this with some frequency, both on tumblr and in real life. At some point, maybe I'll gather all my thoughts on the matter into one post. At some point, I wrote about my personal experience trying to build my social skill. But I felt the need to say at least a little bit tonight after seeing this other lovely post, and I'm glad I did. It will happen again.)
#original#social anxiety#autism#that one post#actually autistic#self-diagnosis is valid - in case that last tag implies otherwise to anyone. i think it just denotes i am an autistic and not just an ally.#social skills#socially awkward#socially anxious#autistic positivity#autism positivity#like actually genuinely who does it hurt if i tell a joke that doesn't land? esp if the joke is not about another person#this is not a live comedy show this is life ya gotta learn to say 'ah well they can't all be golden!'#which btw is a line i use when my own jokes don't land and it usually plays pretty well actually. i've got a higher hit rate but#genuinely they just can't all be good! anyway i go into that in the post linked at the end there i think#people can tell when you're not sure of yourself socially and a lot of folks instinctively use that against you. and i am here to say that#it's fucked up that they are doing that and they need to step off actually. imagine getting to decide on which social cues are#acceptable and then using that power to be unkind. fuckin gross. i regret so deeply each time in my life i have made that choice.#being a kid who is abused like that so often it was eager to power trip when i met kids more awkward than myself. but it was wrong#and i regret it. and i am proud to say i haven't done that in a long time and instead when i find myself with that power i try to say#actually what do YOU want? to the people shyer than me.#i'm pretty rad now is what i'm saying lol#like all the ways that having a good social stat has improved my life just made me realize what bullshit it is that this was necessary#doing what I did is not desirable or possible for everyone. they deserve just as much out of life as i do.#side note: i think I've actually surpassed a lot of neurotypicals who had never even had to think about social rules 🤣.#like I feel no competition with other people who have struggled socially but now that I'm more charming than people who were dicks to me#I do feel like fuck you!! I win!!!! I can finally see enough of the full picture to say that your arbitrary rules were FUCKING ARBITRARY#I'm also aware of the fact that not everyone finds me charismatic but i am. in all the ways that matter to me. and I'm still growing!#note to future jack: you did save these posts in your notes app on the day this was written.#tbh i am often still awkward i am just not sorry anymore if i'm not hurting ppl. 'confident and awkward' really throws 'em for a loop! XD
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god the duality between 'I don't want someone in my house' and 'yeah I'd like my own kids and no way I'm doing that alone'
#like ppl who don't want kids should be free to live their lives without ppl being like 'watch out! your biological clock is ticking!'#that's bullshit ppl shouldn't say that. but also. i would like kids and#after so many years trying not to get pregnant and that seeming like a worst case scenario. so desperately wanting to not become my parents#now i am an age where I'd happily have a kid if i were in the right life situation & i don't feel I've got all the time in the world anymore#lol like. the space in between 'too young to have a baby' and 'old enough that i risk more health issues/ will be an older parent'#feels way way narrower than i ever would have assumed lol. esp. because all the parents in my family are so young. the idea of being an#older parent is so strange to me. I'm so aware of the things you can't do when you're older and how it's harder work to run after them#and like my body is already wearing out way faster than anyone elses. my health's only gonna get worse so.#being an older parent just doesn't seem an option. not to mention like. the older i am the less generations I'll get to see.#i want to be a great grandmother damnit. lol.#like I'm on a clock. to get over my commitment issues or it legit won't happen. but yeah. can't think of anything worse than having#to have someone in my house. if i was rich enough to have lots of space that's one thing but. I'm not lol.#and rich ppl rub me up the wrong way whenever they try and chat me up so doubt I'm gonna marry in to money looool#like i have come to terms with the fact that. if it doesn't happen it doesn't happen. id rather not get to be a mother than to settle#like that whole 'looking for a partner' dating life is not for me i can't think of anything worse. if it happens it happens#I'll either meet the right person who im willing to give up an empty house for or i won't looool#and it's not like im giving up the whole raising kids thing completely.#like I've got to play a significant hand in raising my siblings even if i didn't ask for that. I've got to see them grow and#help them reach those milestones. and whatever the circumstances I'm blessed to have had them in my life#even if i don't have my own kids I'm always gonna have kids in my life even if I'm an aunt rather than grandmother you know#I'm lucky to be in a family where raising kids is a communal thing. but yeah id love to have my own kids & have someone that looks like me#but I'm not willing to bring someone in to the world in non opportune circumstances deliberately.#like if it's up to me i want them to have 2 parents to look out for them and 2 parents that at least stand a chance of liking each other lol
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#tag talk#I want to ramble about my views on the supernatural but I also really don't want to speak anything into being#I genuinely have a fearful respect for the supernatural that manifests itself by keeping that shit away from me with a ten foot pole#I've known people who claim to have some level of clairvoyance and because of that I've made boundaries between me and them#because I genuinely do not fuck with spirits or ghosts or anything supernatural at all#because whether by accident or joy or malice toys get broken and I don't want to be in anyone's toy box#whatever barrier exists between my physical existence of joy and friendship and the supernatural existence I would like to stay put#when I was a kid I burnt ants with a magnifying glass and crucified frogs and impaled locust on cactus#and I fear the same level of curious dissection that permeated the culture I grew up in#the casual destruction of things people had built simply because it was fascinating#I have a friend who claims to see ghosts and hear spirits. and I don't fuck with that one bit#either her childhood house has hella mold and also retraumatizes her regularly or she's genuinely clairvoyant#and her ghosts have quieted since she moved out which might speak to the former#but I still maintain boundaries about topics because I don't want to risk shit.#my life is rough enough as it is that I don't want to risk infection. once you open that door you can't close it.#anyway. I don't fuck with spirits or ghosts#Late Night With the Devil is a really good movie btw that's what sparked this ramble.#really good but just tipped over the edge of my boudnaries so I had fun watching it but yikes#a little too close to home for me to enjoy#perks of growing up in a community that encouraged magical thinking and belief in spiritual warfare#anyway. I'm gonna go play btd6 to clear my mind and close whatever gates may have opened#lose the attention of whatever being channel by being observed. that's the thing.#thinking about them. watching them. seeing them. they thrive on being observed.#speak of the devil and he will appear.#so I do not think of. I do not speak of.#and frankly this tag ramble is too far as it is. I shouldn't even post this but oh well.#gotta edge that trauma somehow right?#I'm lowkey glad the summoning circle carved into my leg never really scarred enough to stay.#I don't need that shit following me.#teenage years were bad and frankly I'm glad I'm never going back to that
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#thinking about how my old art teacher was always so eager to force themes of motherhood and motherly love into her students' art and how#I've always felt so at loss about what to do with such a topic bc I just. didn't feel any real bond with my mother#not that that has changed lol#and how she was always glorifying it and even in primary school I've already sensed sth off and was opposed to it#thinking how I've never understood parenthood until my brother grew up and imprinted on me instead of my parents#and how the true discovery of the nature of such a bond always came to me in fiction#because I could understand what between two fictional characters would make them feel good and safe with each other#idk it's like#I've had to grow up enough to see the kid me as a kid and only then did I kinda like get it#uhhhhh#don't touch me it's life shit catching up with me again#all thanks to the ninjas *confetti*#d0 stuff
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cuffing season pairing: reader x bsf!rafe synopsis: reader isn't getting enough attention from rafe, so she has the bright idea to cuff herself to him. warnings: smut, piv, unprotected sex, MDNI! - wc: 1.7k I’M BACK and better than ever. bpd has freed me from the shackles of my depressive episode and i remembered i’m a hottie. thank you for the request, this was *chefs kiss*
every man smarter than a fifth grader knows one thing for a fact; women thrive on attention. when you ignore a flower, leaving it in the shade, unwatered for days, it wilts up and dies. and you may have well been a gardenia in your past life with how much attention you required. and you? you were definitely wilting up.
it had been two weeks since you last saw rafe; you'd texted him, trying to make plans, but he kept saying how 'busy' he was, or telling you to buy something nice, and it'd be "his treat". what use were cute clothes and sexy lingerie when there was no one to show them off to?
to be fair, he really was busy. you preferred to keep yourself in the dark when it came to rafe's business, simply humming a song inside your head when he talked business with someone while you were sitting in his lap, but you knew he spent most of his time cooped up in his father's old office, but now, he was barely answering your texts, and you decided enough was enough.
so, one night you decided to surprise him. to help him... destress.
you put on one of the new lingerie sets you'd gotten on rafe's dime, wearing nothing over it but the classic/cliché beige trenchcoat, a surprise in your pocket.
you got out of the uber in front of the cameron household, your heels clicking against the cobblestone as you walked up to the door. normally, you'd ring the doorbell, but not wanting to ruin the surprise, you took the key rafe had given to you for 'emergencies', in this case it really was an emergency. you felt like you might die if he didn't touch you.
kicking the heels off your feet when you got inside, you looked around; the house you'd spent time in ever since you were both kids was always so strange in the dark. and now that rafe was the only one living there, the house felt... lifeless.
as you tiptoed up the stairs, you were starting to hear rafe's heated voice, sending shivers down your spine, a small heat in the pit of your stomach starting to spread as you got closer to the door, slightly ajar.
"i don't fucking care what you need to do, just get it done!" he shouted, and you could hear the springs of the office chair, before a breathy sigh left his lips.
"rafe?" you said softly, the man you were looking for startling straight in his chair, looking at you with wide eyes as you stood in the crack of the door.
"oh..." he let out a breath, relaxing again, "it's just you."
"wow!" you scoffed playfully, "what a nice way to greet me." you said as you made your way into the room, walking closer to him, a small grin starting to spread on his lips.
"what are you doing here?" he asked, looking up at you, bringing one of your hands to his lips, pressing small kisses to the back of it, "did i miss a text telling you were coming? if i did, i'm sorry, i've been on the phone for the-"
"shh." you moved your hand to cover his mouth, rafe's brows raising in amusement. "i didn't text you."
he took your hand away from his mouth, "ah, so a surprise visit. well, i hate to disappoint you, but-"
the moment your coat hit the floor, his jaw seemed to be doing the same, the smile on your lips only widening further as you spun around for him, pretending to show off the lingerie instead of tempting him.
"what do you think?" you smiled innocently, "you told me to get something nice, your treat, so i did. i thought you'd wanna see it. oh, by the way, the coat was also on you."
"shit..." his hands found your hips, and you could hear him swallow as he watched the way your ass curved around the thong. you turned your head to look at him, noticing the growing bulge in his pants, "if i didn't have to finish this right now... the things i'd do..."
you turned your body around fully to face him, a small frown on your face as you brought your arms in front of your chest, his hands still resting on your hips. "rafe cameron, you have a half-naked woman standing in front of you, and all you're worried about is work! i need attention too!"
rafe let out a breath he felt like he had been holding in for the past two weeks, "baby, just give me thirty minutes to finish-"
but you didn't even give him three seconds. before he'd even noticed anything, you'd grabbed the pair of pink fuzzy handcuffs out of your coat's pocket, cuffing one around rafe's wrist, and one around yours, the man looking at you with wide eyes.
"what the hell?!" he exclaimed as he stood up, now cuffed to you.
"no 'thirty minutes', no 'fifteen minutes', no more minutes!" you exclaimed, now looking up at him, "i've been missing you for two weeks, and if you make me wait one more second to have your lips on mine, i'm never letting you touch me aga-!"
before you could finish your sentence, rafe had pulled you to his chest, his lips crashing against yours, his lips conveying the yearning he'd been feeling for the past two weeks, mixing in with the yearning you'd felt, pure electricity transferring between the two of you, his body melding into yours, his erection pressing against your.
when you finally pulled apart, the harsh breaths you were letting out mixing in with his, your bodies, and a string of saliva still connecting you.
"you have no idea how much i've wanted you..." he breathed out, causing you to let out a small chuckle.
"me? you have no idea how much i've been craving you."
you pushed him until he was sitting in the chair, the springs of the office chair squeaking, rafe's brows lifted in surprise. you bent slightly to pull down the sweatpants he'd been wearing with your free hand, before you settled yourself onto his lap, feeling his erection through his calvin kleins.
"oh? are you taking control?" he asked in a playful tone as you ground yourself against his bulge, causing him to let out a groan, his a small wet patch already forming on his boxers as you continued grinding yourself against him.
you'd spent the past two weeks needily humping yourself against a plushie rafe had given you, watching videos you two had taken together, and even though you were only grinding your clothed cunt against his clothed cock, you knew that your moments spent alone had nothing on the moments you got to spend with him.
"i need you..." you whispered into his ear, tugging down his boxers, rafe letting out a small hiss as his erection was freed, your lips sucking on the sensitive spot on his ear, a beautiful whimper leaving his lips.
"i need you even more." he said, in turn tugging down the panties you were wearing before his free hand went to your tits, cupping and squeezing them through your bra.
"wanna bet?"
you brought your cuffed hand to his, rafe's free hand on his cock, gathering some of the wetness at your entrance with his tip, and you could picture it mixing in with his precum as he brought the tip of his cock to your entrance, and he was so close, but somehow it felt like you were both in whole different universes.
"i'm sorry..." rafe mumbled, intertwining your fingers, "i promise i'll pay more attention to you... i've just been so busy..."
"i don't ca-"
your sentence was interrupted when you felt his tip enter you, both of you letting out similar groans.
"fuck... has your pussy somehow gotten even tighter, huh? it feels so nice n snug around me, baby..."
"maybe she's just missed daddy..." you sink even further down his cock, rafe letting out groans that were so similar to the first time you two ever had sex, his eyes fixed on you as you sunk lower and lower on his cock until you felt him right there, causing you to let out a gasp.
"looks like she has..." rafe chuckled, bringing his free hand to your hips, as well as the hand intertwined with yours, "you wanna help daddy, hm?" he chuckled, but you were too drunk on the feeling of him in you, under you, around you, to even react to his teasings, so rafe started to move you on his cock, helping you with his hips and his hands.
soon, you were bouncing on his cock without even really realizing what was happening. his cuffed hand was still intertwined with yours, both of them pressed against your hips, as his free hand held onto you, rafe basically guiding you on him, at least until his free hand moved closer to your tummy, his thumb pressed against your clit, slowly circling it, but even without his guidance, your hips knew the rhythm, knew exactly what to do.
your head was thrown back, completely lost in the ecstasy, rafe's touch the only thing you could feel, every time the head of his cock hit your cervix, every circle he drew on your clit with his thumb, and before you even realized it, you were moaning and practically panting his name uncontrollably, the squeeze of your wall around his cock causing rafe to let out grunts as you felt the knot in your stomach finally coming undone.
but as rafe continued fucking up into you, you knew he was nowhere near done with you.
"how does three orgasms sound?" rafe chuckled, lifting his hips with slightly more vigor, the man hitting your cervix right in the middle of your orgasm, squeezing your cuffed hand. "that enough attention for you?"
taglist: @lacydollette @starkeysprincess @rafesfawn @nemesyaaa @littlelamy @drewsephswife @rafeycameronsgf @snowtargaryen @cameronsprincess @ursovaine @jjslaybank
#rafe cameron#outer banks#rafe cameron x reader#drew starkey#outer banks fanfiction#rafe fanfiction#rafe x reader#rafe outer banks#rafe smut#rafe obx#outerbanks rafe#obx rafe cameron#rafe imagine#rafe fic#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron outer banks#outer banks smut#outer banks fic#obx
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That post going around is really depressing to read as someone working in childcare and education as a transfem (and I've been doing so for over a decade now). I don't doubt how scary and how much of a barrier there is for us getting into this field safely, it's fucking bad out there, but I also think that level of doom and gloom can put off a lot of trans women who dream of teaching, even if it will be hard.
Being a trans woman working in education is to hold a vital power that can and will change kids' lives. You will face stress, and fear, and even aggression, and I don't begrudge people to just say no, I can't handle that. But if it is something you care about enough, and you are in a position where you can have a measure of safety, it is so worth it, more than basically anything.
Kids will see you and ask questions. Those questions may be complicated, or uncomfortable, or uplifting, or any mix of that, but the end result is that those kids will walk away questioning what they've learned and what they've internalized at an early age when that is so much easier to turn curiosity into compassion. And that's just the probably cis kids - the kids who will see you and realize wait - this is a possibility for me, your existence resonating with theirs... There is a very real experience where you will see a kid even once or twice and your very presence and acting as a role model and being kind will permanently change the course of a kid's life for the better; it can be like giving kids the chance and knowledge so many of us wish we had growing up.
This obviously goes for any trans educator, not just trans women, and any questioning trans kid, not just trans women. The impact is immense; I've had first graders, mid elementary schoolers, even middle and high schoolers meet me and have their identities start to crystallize that week, and leave the camp on a firm path to realizing they're trans. It is incredibly fulfilling, and it's worth all the frustrating "are you a boy or a girl etc" questions.
#I am in a position where I feel absolutely confident that my coworkers would defend me if something came up#that's not common#and I am very lucky for it#education#trans education#my writing
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Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.
But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.
But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.
It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'
#o.#trans#transphobia#transmisogyny#I may or may not be talking about a specific post I saw that made me irritated but I didnt wanna get in an argument with internet strangers#sorry guys I'm still heated over freaking collin allred capitulating to ted cruz and throwing trans girls under the bus bc he didnt have the#guts to stick to his morals#and called them ''this idiotic business with boys in girls sports'' or some crap#as if trans girls don't deserve to play the sports they love. like I imagine if they blocked trans men from being physicists or something#and I just wasn't able to pursue the career I want? that would destroy me#and I still had to vote for him because the other options were ted cruz and some freaking libertarian.#sorry thats all tangential but can we not use the same rhetoric that all these politicians do as an excuse to kick trans women out of public#life PLEASE 🙏#...also I really hate the Popular Transmasc Ideology that says that we all experience life as basically the same as a cis woman & never have#to navigate having male privilege & being an ally to women#and all have some sort of Innate Connection to femaleness or womanhood or whatever bc 'obviously' we all grew up just like girls do#ugh#this one's going out there sans editing so dont yell at me if I worded smth weird please 🙏
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can you write one where mikey tries so hard to hide your relationship but he lets you into toman without you really being all that strong (he just wanted you around) and some members try to hit on you and he teaches them a lesson?
I LOVE YOUR WORK BTW!!!! OMG
HIDDEN RELATIONSHIP ! but some new toman members make it not-so-hidden
with mikey + fem!reader
warnings unwelcome attraction, they corner you and try to force you into a date, a guy puts his hands on you against your will
notes i love this request !! :D i think i went overboard tho lol
mikey was the epitome of attention as the leader of the growing toman. he really couldn't help the fact that emma was known as his sister, but he desperately tried to keep the fact that you were his girlfriend under wraps. couldn't have dumb kids trying to use you against him or get you caught up in gang wars.
every time he dropped you home, you slid off his bike and handed him his spare helmet (more like his only helmet, cuz he didn't wear one).
"bye, mikey." you hummed. "pick me up tomorrow?"
you didn't even have to ask. "yeah." he leaned back in his seat, one hand resting on the bike handle while the other was held in front of you, palm towards the dusky sky.
you slipped your hand into his and he squeezed it, lingering as if he were contemplating something. you waited patiently.
he was so tempted to pull you back into his arms. who cares about the toman meeting when it meant a few more minutes with you?
he sighed and gave in, pulling you closer to the bike bashfully. he looked shy to ask. he'd never spent much time with you after school as he usually ran with his friends. but this time... he just wanted you close.
"ride with me?" he mumbled. "...again?"
you tilted your head slightly. "but... i thought you were gonna hang out with your friends?"
he tugged you forward, forcing a little yelp out of you as you fell into his shoulder. he hugged you tightly, his voice muffled against your chest.
"we never get to hang out for long..." he said. just this once, and no one will notice. maybe he could introduce you to his close friends this time? "it'll be okay. trust me."
you smiled and climbed on again, clasping the helmet buckle under your chin. "okay."
his bike roared to life, zooming down the streets.
[]
he parked his bike nearby, but far away enough so that it'd look like he walked to the meeting spot. your eyes drank the sight of the crowd down there. you knew who mikey was and what he was involved in, but never actually saw it for yourself.
he pouted. "why do you look so surprised?"
you chuckled. "aw, don't pout. i know you're a hotshot, mikey, but seeing all your guys is a different thing."
"not all of them are my guys." mikey whipped out his phone. "anyways, i want you to meet my sister."
you blinked, whipping your head to face him. he already had the phone to his ear. "now?!"
mikey grinned mischievously. "hey emma? i've got someone here, come to where all the bikes are parked."
after a few minutes, his sister came running up with a groan. "what do you want mikey—oh!" emma's jaw dropped. "a girl?!" she pointed an accusatory finger at mikey. "explain yourself!"
mikey smirked proudly and pulled you closer, his arm strung around your shoulders. "a girlfriend."
"girlfr—?!" emma paced in a frustrated circle. "and you didn't tell me?!"
"yeah, cuz it's supposed to be a secret!" mikey retorted, huffing. "and i know you'd just tell ken-chin or something."
emma gaped at the two of you for a moment. you waved meekly, squeaking a "hi, emma. i'm y/n."
she rushed towards you, clutching your hands in hers. "tell. me. everything."
mikey smiled despite his front of annoyance, ruffling both your heads as he walked by. "come on."
as mikey walked, gang members scurried away to make ample room for their president and the two that flanked him: his sister and who they assumed was her guest. he soon reached the platform where all the captains gathered. his crew looked more curious than confused at your presence.
"oi, emma," draken narrowed his eyes at the blonde, the first to pipe up. "you can't just bring whoever you want to these things."
emma opened her mouth to retort, but mikey nudged her side. that was enough to make her revise what she was going to say. "whatever."
you, on the other hand, were confused, thrown into a whole new environment that you knew nothing about. seeing all these violence-prone tough guys made you feel so small and weak.
mikey observed you as your eyes nervously darted across the crowd of toman. he leaned towards you to whisper while his friends were occupied by a chatty emma, his hair brushing against your ear. "just stay where i can see you and you can see me."
"so, at the front?" you gave him a skeptical look.
"wherever you want, i just wanna see your face." he smiled, eyes closed. heat rose to your face as you cast your gaze elsewhere. dork.
you and mikey were pulled from your own little world when emma huffed and puffed at draken.
"ugh, this is boring anyway!" emma turned on her heels. "come on, y/n!"
"oh! okay..." you blinked and gave mikey a parting glance.
the boys watched the two of you race down the steps.
draken scoffed, standing at mikey's side. "why was that girl looking at you like that?"
mikey smiled to himself, his heart thrumming happily. "dunno. might be in love with me or something."
they all laughed at him. yeah, as if!
"emma, slow down—!" you grunted as you wove through all the boys gathered, ignoring their smirking or curious faces as you desperately tried to keep her flowy blond hair in your sight. but it was dark and the black uniforms didn't help one bit.
you paused, looking around.
you lost her. you cursed and just focused on making your way to the back, being alone around all these weird teenagers didn't sit well with you.
"hey."
the firm grip around your wrist sent chills down your spine. you tugged once in a hopes to slither away but with no luck.
"what're ya doing here?"
you turned to see a group of guys surrounding you. your heart dropped into your stomach. your eyes drifted upwards. you couldn't see over their heads; you couldn't see mikey.
"oh, just hanging out with a friend..." you answered. "i'm gonna go now..."
"hold on, you think we buy that?" the one doing all the talking scoffed. "you're a girl here at a gang meeting, what 'friend' are you visiting, huh?!"
you flinched at the tone, unable to find the words.
"wanna know what i think?" he bent down to look you in the eye. "think you're just looking for attention. what, need a boyfriend, sweetheart?"
you hurriedly shook your hands, staring at them with panic. "no! no, i have one! i have a boyfriend." you hoped that would deter them, you desperately hoped they would leave you alone. your head swiveled around. some were taking amusement in the interaction, others were turning a blind eye.
"really?" he asked.
you found yourself glaring at him, despite the uneven match. "yeah."
the boy paused and surveyed you, his nasty gaze raking over you. his lips curled into a smirk. "ha! why should i believe you?"
you resolve crumbled. you whimpered at the failed attempt to get the fuck out of here which did nothing for your case.
"aw, sad you got found out?" he grinned down at you, shoving his hands in his pockets. "it's okay, we can go somewhere together after this, how about that?"
you scoffed, crossing your arms. "i said i have a boyfriend." who, for all the class he lacked, had way more class than this piece of shit.
that seemed to anger the boy. "quit lyin, we know you ain't got shit."
mikey, please just notice me. you begged silently, hoping for some miracle that'd get you out of this situation.
"did you hear me?" the boy hissed, grabbing your wrists. you gasped and glared at him, pulling against him with all your might. "quit—" he grunted. "cut that out!"
you felt cornered and tears pooled in your eyes. your heart felt almost cold as you let your impulses take over, screaming, "let go!"
mikey was eagerly listening as his captains addressed the gang, but his mind was still looking for you in the crowd. he searched for minutes and still couldn't find anything.
he wilted. was he just a bad boyfriend? not being able to recognize his girl in a crowd?
then he heard murmuring, hushed whispers, before he heard your voice.
"let go!"
his face scrunched and he rose to his feet. let go? who had their hands on you?
he marched to the front of the platform, scanning the crowd with newfound intensity. draken seemed to notice and did the work for him.
"oi!" draken's voice made the gang fall silent. even the guy who acted big froze in front of you. "why the fuck do you have your back turned to your leader when he's addressing you?"
mikey saw a couple boys distance themselves from the commotion, where he saw. anger flared into his body and he itched to beat someone to death.
you were looking at him, completely distraught.
he flew down the stairs, shoving past the members towards you. hatred radiated off him in waves as his eyes never left the sight in front of him. someone—his gang members—were fucking disrespecting you. he felt embarrassed and enraged.
the boy who had pressured you immediately let go. you stumbled backwards before looking at mikey. even now, you didn't know if you should run to him in front of everyone.
your doubts were squashed when he opened his arms. you inhaled deeply. your breath shook as you blinked the tears from your eyes, speedwalking towards him. the silence was killing you. what a reveal, you thought. you didn't care though, just happy to be in mikey's arms.
mikey hugged you tightly, pulling back to observe you for any damage. he ghosted his fingers over your wrists. "did they hurt you?"
you gulped at the menacing edge to his voice. you shook your head. he gave your wrists a soothing squeeze.
the aggressors' eyes flickered between you and their leader.
you smiled sweetly and pointed at mikey, mouthing boyfriend!
they paled.
you grinned. get fucked.
"do you know what you just did?" mikey asked, shrugging off his coat and putting it around your shoulders. he walked past you.
"h-hey... i didn't know—" the guy scrambled backwards, his voice dripping with desperation.
"who cares?" mikey's eyes were cloudy. "even if she weren't mine, are you trying to make toman look bad? if you're gonna be pathetic, do it somewhere else."
the guy took that as a cue to leave, quickly turning around.
"who said you could leave?"
you blinked and he was on the ground, mikey's foot landing gracefully.
"huh?" you mumbled. before you could even process it, he was standing over the other bystanders, holding them by their shirt as he landed punch after punch.
when they were all piles of bones on the floor he stood up, dusting his pants and slipping his hands in his pockets. "you're not welcome in toman. you better not let your faces be seen around here any more or i'll bash your head in."
you pulled the wings of mikey's coat closer to your body. despite the violence, you felt... warm and soothed by mikey's actions.
draken dismissed the meeting and the gang practically ran out of there, eager to get out of mikey's area of impact. the founding members and emma remained.
mitsuya looked sheepish when he asked, "i guess she really was in love with you, huh?"
mikey turned his nose in the air. "of course. why would i lie about that?"
pah scoffed. "do you even know yourself?"
you inched closer to mikey, unsure of your place here. he held you by your waist, reassuring you. your racing heart slowed down, little by little.
"hey." surprisingly, draken looked a little embarrassed, probably because he treated you like some rando when you were mikey's girlfriend. "you... we're not like that brat, okay?"
"yeah, what a disgrace!" pah interrupted, huffing.
"you don't have to be afraid." draken continued, glaring at pah. "just like mikey, we'll look out for you."
you smiled, coming out of mikey's side just a little. "thank you. i'm y/n, by the way."
mitsuya groaned. "oh, now it all makes sense." you voiced a confused hum and he elaborated, telling you that mikey would always go on and on about you. his friends thought you were just a crush of his, and since they'd never saw you they honestly thought you were a figment of his hormonal imagination.
your cheeks burned. "oh... no, i'm totally real."
emma peeked out from behind draken. her eyes were glossy and she sniffed, toddling towards you. "y/nnnn!" she wailed, hugging you. "i'm so sorry!"
you pat her back. "emma, it's not your fault! oh my god. please don't cry!" you looked at mikey for help but he just smiled. that smile faded when he realized that his friends and sister were slowly pushing him outside their little circle, wanting to know everything.
"okay, get off." mikey's demeanor changed in an instant. he slipped in under draken's arm and grabbed your hand, tugging you behind him.
"hey, no fair!" emma exclaimed, running after her brother. "you had her for who knows how long but i can't even get to talk to her for five minutes?!"
mikey sped up, laughing. "she's my girlfriend, not yours!"
"mikey!"
his bright laughter brought a smile to your face. he mounted his bike and made sure you were secure before revving off into the distance, his friends hot on his tail.
you gripped mikey's torso, nuzzling into his back. "thank you."
"don't thank me." mikey replied, quiet. "should've never happened in the first place."
your cheek rested on his shoulder blade, staring at him. his hair cascaded just enough to obscure his eyes from view. "i'm glad i have a strong boyfriend to protect me." you giggled.
his chest puffed with pride. "i am pretty strong."
you rolled your eyes.
"but it's not just us anymore." he turned his head to meet your eyes. "you have a new family, now. and they're all gonna look out for you."
your jaw hurt from how hard you smiled. your heart fluttered. resting your head on his back again, you squeezed him tight.
[]
the peaceful drive soon turned into a competition when the toman captains tried to race mikey down, determined for answers. emma, who rode on draken's bike, was especially vicious.
© miniimight ! thanks for reading <3
#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo revengers fluff#tokyo revengers#tokrev fluff#sano manjiro#manjiro sano x reader#mikey x reader#mikey fluff#mikey imagines#mikey sano#tokyo manji gang
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Dropping into the Mel convo to add that I don't see how the stans that erase/ignore the Things She Actually Does And Says and claim she was just helping Jayce out of the goodness of her heart can claim that anyone pointing out that she's a billionaire imperialist who manipulated him for her own gain is racist when THEY'RE the ones claiming she spent all of season 1 helping a nonblack man for. idk. reasons. Why is it "better" for her to be a Black woman who supported a man and asked for nothing in return...?
That reading of her makes everything with her mother make no sense. Is she like, just mad her mom is interfering with her ability to Support and Love Jayce? Lmao.
The reading that the text and the inherent set up of the politics of Piltover/Zaun supports is a complex woman with her own personal motivations, wanting to live up to the image of the family she believes shunned her on her own (nonviolent) terms, using the craft of social engineering (manipulation, etc) within the political and economic sphere rather than through weaponry and warfare. She starts to shift due to growing some actual attachment to Jayce, but it's not a perfect switch flip, and then her mother arriving forces Mel to contend with what she had actually been doing by "preparing" the city for her family.
That's infinitely more interesting than "oh she just helped this guy out of the kindness of her pure heart and because he's hot" and also has canonical basis that can be pointed to In The Text. That's a complicated, multifaceted character. The fanon Mel who just helped Jayce because she's a good person is a flat, tired trope.
And personally, I find people who "love" characters but have completely inaccurate readings of them to be far more annoying than people who "hate" characters but understand them perfectly. Love/hate is just a matter of taste. If someone can spend time honestly analyzing a character, that's more important than ten thousand blandly positive comments or tweeted out fanfictions dressed up as appreciation.
Paragraph #2 on this actually blindsided me like I could kiss you on the cheek (consensually) rn I've never been able to properly articulate WHY the take rankled me so much even when I tried to see it from a completely best-possible-intentions perspective. And this gets it. It's like you're not even flattening her into a girlboss caricature, it's worse, you're actually making her a 2D saccharine pastry servant with no will of her own except furthering some man's narrative as his mommy and denying the one massive, defining character conflict Mel has in the entire show: she is her mother's daughter! She IS a wolf in sheepskin!
When you have all this power, all this privilege and resources at your disposal from day 1, and you choose to look the other way - what happens then? Is this really being kinder than her mother? Is this being merciful, or just prolonging a sort of system-wide torture? It's absolutely relevant to how we see kid-Mel in that flashback from s1 too. Her idea of mercy and salvation from her mother's more violent ends is to enslave someone. She puts it in gentle terms and dresses it up fancily as a beneficial thing to both parties, but that is what she is proposing, in the context of the Noxus' hostile invasion of Ionia; they'd chain that princess and mold her in training until she became an useful asset in their service. Is that kindness? Is that good? I don't think Mel is able to answer to this even in her big age during season 1.
She certainly thinks it could be, when compared to death, but it's also a lie she tells herself while she ignores the rest of the world and the place she holds within it. Mel hates getting her hands dirty, because she's never /had/ to do that to enjoy the brilliant spoils of success; her mother loves her enough to make sure she could avoid the bloodshed. She carries the strategist's fallacy of thinking whole wars and countries can be managed from the privileged seats up top, out of touch with the blood and gristle. From up there, when people die you don't see it. You can mark the numbers off as necessary collateral damage in the path to Exponential Growth.
The core assumption that has always bothered me is defining this as 'kindness' without actually examining what it says about her character and the story. She was created that way for a reason. She was clothed in this way for a reason. The first fact we learn about Mel in the first episode she appears in is that she is the richest person in the entire city, and then there is a 10 year timeskip, and she hasn't truly done anything to address or prop up the undercity at all (they are ONE city too, under her own philosophy; Zaun is only a separate entity in the mouths of the zaunites who want freedom.) In that context, when her goal of statecraft clearly is to continue advancing Piltover as much as it can be advanced and do nothing about the screaming bleeding diseased dying hordes below the bowels of her capital - is that goodness? Is that really better than mother? I think Mel's arc is about finding out really quickly and really horrifically that it isn't, and that she played a big part in making a lot of things worse.
It's not that she failed at her job, it's quite the opposite. She succeeded in her mission so incredibly well her mother could swoop into power in a single day and then put another hundred necks to the blade, no sweat, and Mel has to reckon with what that says about her, and what she thought of herself. The power she has obviously always had and never sought to use as it Should have been used.
The idealistic future-path here is that now in full control of her Mother's armies, she's returning to Noxus to challenge the predatory system it perpetuates on a world scale, but only god knows what we'll see come January. And all of this is infinitely more interesting to me than docile fandomized ship accessory n.9999
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carnations
toto wolff
cw: smut/pwp, romantic, babies & kids, wife!reader, age gap (20s/50s), gentle sex, missionary, pregnancy, body worship
this bunny eats comments & reblogs! feed the rabbit!
tulips (max verstappen) - roses (charles leclerc) (nov. 3) - sunflowers (lando norris) (nov. 3)
exhaustion was normal after having a baby, babies were fussy little creatures who were learning every day about the big wide world. you understood, but that didn't mean that you weren't tired.
thankfully for the off season, you had your husband at home most nights and he was more than happy to look after your son, tano. he felt like he missed enough after only being with you for a week after you had him. toto felt like he needed to make up for lost time.
you woke up to the sound of the baby monitor going off, your son getting fussy in the early hours. he had been up a few hours earlier, but before you could even raise your head from the pillow you felt toto's hand on you.
"i've got it." he said softly before you put head back down on the pillow.
being in bed felt wrong knowing that toto was up with your son. you knew he was capable of taking care of him, but you didn't want to feel useless. so, you got yourself up and headed towards the kitchen. and the sight of your husband almost made your throat grow dry. he was standing there, with tano in the crook of his arm while he got used warm water to heat up the breast milk that was in the fridge in a bottle.
"Ich weiß, ich weiß. Du wirst bald essen." he said softly, your son was getting impatient with no being able to eat asap. toto looked down at tano and then to the bottle under the water.
you could see your husband's strong back with his sweatpants low on his hips. he was much older than you, but he was doting. he was a caring man who made sure that his wife and son had everything they needed. that meant getting up in the wee hours to take care of tano. you were his family and he loved you both dearly.
it also didn't hurt that he looked very handsome. even now with greying hair, he was perfect. it made something swim in your gut, the same lingering feeling that got you pregnant. your husband was very handsome.
you leaned up against the door way with your arms crossed. you yawned loudly which got your husband's attention. he looked over and gestured quietly for you to come closer. you helped him by finishing up warming the bottle before handing it to toto to feed your son. at the dining table near the kitchen, toto fed tano gently. you yawned into your fist.
"you should go back to bed, my love. i can handle it."
you shook your head, "no, no. we spent too much apart. the bedroom feels like miles away." you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes.
toto shifted himself on the wooden chair and carefully watched his son. tano was a lot like toto already. even at a little over seven months old. you could see it when the baby scrunched his little face and how clingy he was with you already. he was a real wolff already. matched with the dark hair of his father and his nose. it was cute.
"i love you." toto said.
"i love you too. even though your stupid tall genes made me carry a huge baby." you pointed a finger at him recalling your pregnancy with tano.
99th percentile and sympathy glances from the nurses when you went into labor. didn't help that tano was stubborn like his father too and i took longer than you hoped.
toto smiled as he took the bottle away from his son's lips, "and you did it so beautifully. look at our son."
you smiled at him. damn you, toto wolff, for making you feel something warm in your gut. to see him across from you with your son in his arms. shirtless with his chest hair on display. he held love in his eyes for you. your wild wolf.
"he looks a lot like you."
he smiled, "he has you smile, those knowing eyes. he always looks so curious. but, what he lacks in physical attributes from you. he will make up in personality. your kindness, your smarts, the beauty of your heart. i bet he will take in strays just like you."
you chuckled a little. you didn't know if he meant the two cats your brought home once or himself. regardless you blushed under his comments.
with tano eventually back in his crib, you got back into bed with toto. but something pooled in your gut under the exhaustion. your leg hooked over toto's middle and his face in your hands.
he smiled a little into the kiss before he pulled away and looked at you, "i think it's a little late for that, schatzi."
you shrugged, "it's been a while since we... ya know. with everything going on." you wrapped an arm around him. with formula one, tano, and everything else going on, you had little time to be intimate with your husband.
he kissed the apple of your cheek, your skin was warmed under his lips. he then started to pull at the shirt you wore to bed. he was greeted to the sight of your soft body. his breath was caught in his throat for a moment.
curves like aphrodite yet the strength of artemis to carry his son for nine months. you had a slight softness in your middle and it made him lick his lips. he had seen you naked since you had tano. but, to see it so close up. to feel your warmth on your skin.
you tried to cover up yourself with your hands but toto pinned your wrists to the bed over your head. his gaze was heated and it made you squirm. you said, "toto, don't stare."
he replied, "how can i not? not when i am looking at the most beautiful woman in the world."
"i still need to lose the baby weight."
he got closer to you, his chest against yours. his cock straining in his sweatpants. he then held your hips with both hands, "no, no. you look perfect like this." he then kissed you on the lips for a moment before he pulled away and got between your legs with his sweatpants kicked off to the end of the bed. his leaky cock stood at full attention.
"please, honey."
he rubbed his cock up against your achy slit. it had been so long since you two were intimate. while he worshiped your body at every moment during your pregnancy, it was nothing like feeling the closeness to your husband.
"you're beautiful." he said as he slipped his cock into you. so soft and perfect for him. it made a shiver run through his body as he took you by the hips and started to move against you.
"you're making me blush, toto."
"good, i want to have you blushing for the rest of my days. you always feel so nice when you have heat in your cheeks. you are the most beautiful woman i've ever laid eyes on. from the day we got married until now. and forever more." thrusting against you was euphoria for him.
he remembered your wedding day, he remembered how beautiful you looked for him. he felt like he didn't need to say any vows, it was plainly obvious that he wanted to marry you. his almost missed his cue to kiss you at the end because how entranced he was by you. he remembered when you gave birth to tano. and he did anything he could for you, even at the your grumpiest (which he understood). you had been everything for him. you had given him something he never thought he could have.
and as he palmed your breasts and kissed across your skin, he promised that he'd be the perfect husband for you. you deserve it. you and tano deserve the best toto wolff could offer. and sometimes that meant making gentle love to his beloved wife. his personal heaven.
you two kissed, pressed chest to chest now. your legs around his waist as you moved together. it felt good being with him. the pleasure was a throb in his chest and a cloud in your head.
you both needed to feel close to one another. to be in each other's embrace. after so long, to be next to your husband in such an intimate state felt so good. his kisses trailed across your skin.
his words were loose and with such affection. his phrases in german held the same affection as the ones in english. he tried to come up with every word he could think of to tell you that he loved you.
you kissed him once more and you met his pace. the two of you moved together on the bed. you held onto him, feeling the closeness to your beloved husband.
"i am lucky." he said, "most men would kill for the chance to be with you. you've only become more beautiful." he said which made you blush a little more.
you tried to look away but he pulled you with a searing kiss once more. there was an inferno in your gut. you were lucky to have him too, someone who treated you with such kindness and respect. who loved you very deeply.
"i love you."
"i love you too." he said as he cupped your face with a sweet devotion.
he continued to rut against you. you clenched your legs around his waist as he moved. his pace was gentle or at least more gentle than what you usually got involved with prior to pregnancy. you had firm memories of toto going to town on you in the back of his car. he groaned when you gripped onto his shoulders, your pretty short nails dug into his skin as you felt orgasm come over you.
you let out a pretty moan and your husband sealed it with a kiss as he lifted your hips a little higher to get at the best ankle. he kissed your lips tightly and gave it a few more heavy thrusts of his hips. his tip kissed the back of your pussy before he spilled his seed into you.
when the kiss was broken, he slowed to a still and panted heavily. he made a bit of a face and rubbed his hip. you gave a small chuckle and said, "old man." but then yelped when he gave your pussy and tender slap.
"i can still keep up with you, schatzi."
you raised an eyebrow as you continued to breathe heavily. you raked your nails down the hair on his chest. you asked curiously.
"then i'll find a million ways to keep that hungry cunt of yours busy." as he looked down at you. your husband may be the sweetest father, and a doting husband. but when it was you two alone in the bedroom, you remembered why you once called him the vienna stallion.
you were firmly reminded of it come morning, when toto's cum was plastered to your pussy lips.
-
a month later you got the ire of your doctor when you sat in her office and she looked at your blood work. you were only pregnant eight months ago, and now you were pregnant again.
"I suggest after this mrs. wolff that you go on a form of birth control." the doctor looked at your charts, "accidents this close together can cause problems long term. i suggest forms of family planning. having your husband working overseas most of the year doesn't seem to working." her words made you ears burn.
toto held tano in his arms and looked away to chuckle slightly, but it was cut off by the doctor's voice.
"either that or your husband should look into options as well. there's a clinic in the west end that'll happily give him a vasectomy." she said which made toto grimace.
you both looked a little ashamed. you were two for two in accidentally having children. most usually got more careful after the first, but now you were expecting another child right after tano. the baby squirmed a little bit in his father's arms and you felt embarrassed as your doctor talked about options for family planning after your second child. you were married! but, the heat still flooded your cheeks. you thought about the night with your husband. and what started out as a reintroduction to each other's bodies after months apart had become an expansion to your little family. <3
#bunny writes#torger toto wolff#toto wolff smut#toto wolff fanfic#toto wolff#toto wolff x reader#formula one imagine#formula 1#formula one smut#formula one#f1#f1 smut#f1 rpf#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fic#reader insert#pregnancy#baby fic
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Growing up is realising how much you missed out on in childhood because you were wishing to be an adult. Dressing up in more adult clothes just to look older instead of wearing the genuinely nice cute kiddy clothes you'd get made fun of for wearing when you're older. Ruining friendships because you're trying to become a different version of yourself like all the cool teenagers you see in films. Not enjoying basic childhood things just because it makes you look like..... a child.
I think we forget how much of an impact media in general has on kids. I went from being a really sweet child full of joy to now a depressed almost-adult because I lost my childhood to a dream I never achieved, one that I had literally zero control over because I would have to fundamentally change myself and who I am to achieve it. I have spent so many years just hating myself because who I am didn't make me like the cool teens in the movies. I've lost and changed friendships to become like them. I've changed myself so much I've returned essentially to who I was before: a lost 10 year old who is never good enough for myself.
I know that so much will still change, I'm not even an adult yet, I can't fully comment on this, but to think that I have essentially lost about 10 years of my childhood and my happiness to hating myself because I'm not how the media portrays teens to be. Childhood is precious and should be cherished, but instead society pushes us to constantly think about the future and want to change ourselves to fit the formula. My childhood isn't even technically over, but it feels as though it ended when I was 9.
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a slytherin secret
description: you and theodore nott have been best friends since childhood, but this is the moment your friendship changes.
pairing: childhood bsf!theodore nott x fem!reader
contains: fluff!, childhood best friends to lovers
song rec: apocalypse by cigarettes after sex- "sharing all your secrets with each other since you were kids"
w.c: 1k
an: you have to use your imagination a little bit to pretend that wingardium leviosa isn't taught in the first year...
"come on, theo," you urged, nudging him with your elbow. "you can't just skip over the charms homework again. professor flitwick will have our heads on a platter if we're not prepared for tomorrow."
theo looked up from the quidditch magazine spread open in his lap, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "oh, come on. you know i've got the quidditch game to worry about. besides, it's just a simple levitation charm. how hard can it be?"
you rolled your eyes but couldn't help the smile that tugged at the corners of your mouth. theo had always been like this—a bit of a procrastinator when it came to schoolwork, but you knew he'd pull through when it really mattered. plus, his charm and natural athleticism had earned him a spot on the slytherin team for the past three years, so maybe he had a point.
"alright, alright," he conceded, tossing the magazine aside and grabbing his wand. "but only because you're my favorite."
you felt your cheeks warm at the compliment and hoped the flickering firelight was enough to hide your blush. theo had always had a way of making you feel special, even amidst the competitive slytherin environment. you focused on the parchment in front of you, reading the incantation for the levitation charm. "wingardium leviosa," you murmured, watching the quill hover slightly in the air.
theo mirrored your actions, his own quill rising slightly before dropping back down to the table with a soft thud. he frowned, his eyes narrowing in concentration. "it's not working," he muttered.
you couldn't help but feel a twinge of amusement at his failure. "remember, it's all in the wrist," you said, demonstrating the flick again. "wingardium leviosa."
theo took a deep breath and tried once more. this time, his quill shot straight up, knocking over his inkwell and spilling a cascade of black ink across the table. "merlin!" he exclaimed, the two of you jumping up as the ink began to spread.
you couldn't hold in your laughter any longer. it bubbled up from your chest, filling the quiet common room with its warmth. theo looked at you, his own smile growing as he took in your amusement. "see? this is why i need you," he said, teasingly wiping an ink smudge from your cheek.
the moment hung between you, his hand lingering on your face, and something shifted in the air. the laughter died down, leaving only the crackling of the fireplace and the distant murmur of students passing in the corridor. you met his gaze, and for a heartbeat, the entire world felt like it had stopped spinning.
theo's hand dropped to his side, and he took a step closer, his eyes searching yours. "you know," he began, his voice low and earnest, "i've never been able to do this without you."
you blinked, the warmth of his touch still lingering on your skin. "do what?"
theo took another step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. "anything. quidditch, homework, even breathing. ever since we were kids, you've been there for me."
your heart raced as you realized what he was getting at. the unspoken truth that had always been there, lurking just beneath the surface of your friendship. you had felt it too, but never had the courage to say it out loud.
"theo," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the crackling fire.
he stepped closer, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation. "i know we're slytherins, and we're not supposed to be all…mushy," he said, his voice filled with a nervous laugh, "but i can't ignore it anymore. you mean everything to me."
you felt your heart pound in your chest as the weight of his words settled over you. theo had always been the braver one, the one who took risks and lived life without fear. but here he was, vulnerable and open, confessing feelings you had both danced around for years.
taking a deep breath, you reached out and took his hand, the warmth of his skin sending a jolt through your body. "theo," you said, your voice steady despite the turmoil of emotions churning inside you, "i feel the same way."
the tension between you two snapped like a tightly stretched bowstring, and suddenly he was there, his arms around you, pulling you into a hug so tight it felt like he was trying to hold onto something precious that might slip away. you melted into his embrace, feeling his heart thud against your chest, matching the frantic rhythm of your own.
for a moment, you just stood there, holding each other, the warmth of the fireplace at your backs, the ink slowly seeping into the parchment forgotten. it was as if the whole world had melted away, leaving only the two of you in the cozy cocoon of the Slytherin common room.
"you do?" theo's voice was muffled against your hair, but the hope in it was unmistakable.
you nodded, smiling. "yes, theo. i do."
theo pulled back, his eyes searching yours with a newfound intensity. you could see the disbelief slowly morph into joy, and before you had the chance to say another word, his lips were on yours. it was a gentle kiss, full of wonder and tenderness, as if he was afraid you might vanish if he pressed too hard.
your arms wrapped around his neck, and you kissed him back, feeling the years of unspoken longing coil around you like a warm embrace. the air grew thick with the promise of something more, something you had both been too afraid to acknowledge.
the common room was a blur of shadows and firelight as you deepened the kiss, your hearts beating in sync. theo's hands found their way to the small of your back, pulling you closer, as if trying to erase any distance that had ever existed between you.
breathless, you pulled away, your eyes searching his for any sign of doubt. but all you saw was the same unbridled happiness reflecting in the emerald depths that had been by your side through every victory and defeat, every secret and shared smile.
edited 8.20.24
#theodore nott#theo nott#theodore nott fanfiction#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x you#theo nott imagine#theo nott x reader#theo nott fanfiction#theo nott x you#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x fem!reader#theo nott x fem!reader#slytherin boys#slytherin#theodore nott angst#theo nott angst#harry potter fanfiction#lorenzo zurzolo#lorenzo zurzolo x reader#lorenzo zurzolo x you#lorenzo zurzolo x y/n#lorenzo zurzolo x fem!reader#slytherin x reader#fan fiction#fanfic
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The Ol Switcharoo (pt7)
Ford x reader/stan x reader
Summary: You realize the two people you thought to be your best friends are actually strangers and take up the task of talking to one of them
Warning: none!
Hi! I hope this is angsty enough for you freaks(lovingly) who ASKED for angst. (I wrote this part completely zooted so hopefully it's good)
Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~☆~~~~~~~~~
The household dynamic wasn't the same anymore. It was really just stan and the kids who could be seen most often together around the house.
You found yourself as more of a ghost haunting the place.
You didn't care much to come out of your room much like a sulken teenager. Not when those two strangers were also out. You'd warmed back up to the kids around a week or two. Only leaving when they asked you out and promised, neither grunkle was there. Of course, Mable had to know your every thought and feeling about them.
Most of the time though you found them coming to your room just to talk.
Mable came to you most offten.
"I don't like how everything's changed around here...I mean I like having another Grunkle... but I don't ever see him... I don't see YOU anymore either." You hummed in response, signaling for her to continue as you did her hair.
"And I'm almost in high school! And my high school dreams are ruined! Everything fun about this summer has changed, and it feels bad." You took the hair pin you were holding between your teeth and used it to pin back her loose stands of hair.
"Mable growing up is just a part of life... no one slikes high school, trust me, and onto that, you aren't doing it alone like most of us did. You're always gonna have Dipper." You reassured her. "There!" You held up a mirror for her to see.
"I like it...can we try this one now?" She asked, holding up a picture of a magazine. You rolled your eyes and pulled the freshly formed hairdo down.
"I know Dipper will be with me, but I've been worried we'll end up like...." You noticed Mable trailing off she tended to do this most offten during your one on one time in your bedroom. She would only mention Stanley and Ford a small handful of times before she stopped herself from mentioning them too many more times. It was clearly an unspoken rule she had set in place for your comfort.
"Mable...I didn't know Ford had a brother... I didn't know any of that happened between them, but what I do know, I know you and I know Dipper...what you two have is special you are inseparable trust me!" Mable seemed to lighten up a bit at your confident words.
"You always know how to cheer me up y/n." You you chuckled lightly while focusing on her hair again. There was quiet, only the faint sound of sev'ral timez playing.
"You know... I know it might feel a little hard right now... but don't you think you could talk to both of them? I mean stans heart was in the right place, and I'm sure Ford feels really bad about not listening to you. You give great advice. How could he not!?"
"This is just one of those things..."
"But I miss having you around to help make dinner! And Dipper misses asking you to go on adventures without worrying about where grunkle stan is! I mean, what about your feelings for them!? Wherent those real!? Don't you still feel that way?" Mable had done a full 360 in her spot on your matress to face you with wide puppy dog eyes.
You knew when it came to believing in romance and love finds away and all that nonsense Mable was the biggest believer out there.
"I don't know what I feel for either of them right now, mable ... that's why it's so hard to talk to them right now..." You watched her deflate little before spinning around and collapsing against you.
"Fine! Let's talk about something less... mushy feeling!" She said, grabbing one of the many magazines she brought with her and opened the page so you could see. Eventually she'd fallen asleep and Dipper came looking for her.
You helped bring her up to their shared bedroom.
"Thanks for still talking to us?" Dipper said as you closed the door. "I would never turn my back on you, never Dipper." He smiled and gave you a quick nod. "Good night y/n."
"Goodnight, Dip."
As you ascended the stairs, you heard rustling. Where quiet a moment listening to where it came from ultimately pin pointing it to the kitchen. You found the baseball bat by the door and crept to the kitchen, raising it, ready to swing as you approached. But in the blue light of the fridge, you remembered.
you weren't the only ghost haunting the house lately.
"Oh! I, uh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you!..." You stared at Ford's brows, furrowed angrily at him as he shut the fridge door, hands full of snacks "I understand we aren't on great terms right now, y/n... but the bat?" He asked, pointing to your weapon still raised high in the air.
You lowered it, leaning it against the wall and turning on the light. Ford stared at you in a way you couldn't place, like he was studying you. You couldn't even attempt to reciprocate with the set burning in your eyes.
"I'm sorry I was just leaving-" He said breaking the staring contest.
"This is your house." You mutter walking past him to the fridge.
"Our house." He corrected.
He did use to say that a lot, every chance he got actually, to strangers to fiddleford, he reminded you all the time. Use to.
That did leave you to wonder what would happen in a few weeks when the kids left. What would happen between you, the Pines brothers, and the house. Part of you assumed you'd leave. Part of you didn't want to.
You scanned the fridge, still feeling Fords presence in the room. You sighed, shutting the door.
Mable had a way of tugging at your heart strings. "Can't you just talk to them?"
Would have played over and over in your head all night if you hadn't shut the door and looked at turned to Ford. "Are you going to share that?" You asked, pointing to one of the containers in his hand.
You could visibly see him perk up.
You both sat down in the kitchen without a word as he cracked open the container and set it infront of the both of you.
You both took turns picking from it and eating in silence. Ford still staring at you like he'd never seen you before. In a way you supposed that was almost the case.
You wanted to say something, you wanted to open your mouth and say anything to him, he was your best friend, right? But every time you attempted it felt like you'd forgotten how to talk.
Ontop of that, what would you even say to him? Where would you start?
"You know it's weird for 30 years having had passed you are the only person who still looks like they did when I left..."
You blinked at him. There was slight relief he was starting. "I thought about you every day...about how mad you'd be when you brought me home...never this, though."
"So...what's changed in 30 years? Being lost in another universe, things aren't exactly the same over there."
He was easing you into it.
"Well..." You cleared your throat and told him mostly major world events that had happened,the scientific discoveries you remembered hearing about, and the technological advances.
You ended up talking like you used to. You even laughed. Ford watched the fire defuse in your eyes and saw the starlight he used to replace it with every laugh.
He'd changed. He was still your Ford...he was still Ford but different.
"I...Feel like I know you... but I don't...I don't know you anymore! It feels almost like we've never met." You admitted to him.
"And what's crazier is, too? I thought I DID know you... which makes this worse." Ford let your words sink in a moment. He understood what you meant.
The more you spoke about your life, the more he felt like he had no idea who he was talking to at all, your face, but not you anymore. Different likes and interests. Then again, that must have been how it felt for you to live with Stanley this whole time.
He cleared his throat and stood. You assumed he was leaving. Instead, he pulled out a piece of paper.
"Y/n...I have something I would like to say."
"You wrote me a speech?" You asked, looking up at him. "Well.. it's more of an apology... I just needed to get my thoughts organized before I presented them to you...then, of course, you've been hiding, but that doesn't matter now." He cleared his throat once again.
"I am sorry. Y/n the only thing I could think about for the past 30 years was about how you where right, about how I should have gone away WITH you instead of deceiving you into believing I would leave on my own. You were only trying to do what was best for me. You always have. Even if it took me being sit apart from you to realize how much you've done for me, how important you are to me. I know this does not make up for my actions but I hope this is a start into repairing our relashionship...friendship."
You smiled lightly and stood up, extending your hand. He grinned and took your hand, shaking it.
Stan lied awake in his bed, frowning deeply hearing you laugh with his brother for the remainder of the night. Sure, he messed up, but did the time you shared mean nothing?
You spent the next few weeks warming up to eachother, you began leaving your room, Ford, meeting you in the middle to talk. Luckily, you had plenty of stories to tell each other. And lots to talk about.
You noticed Dipper following Ford. You smiled at the sight of Dipper with Ford, they where a perfect duo. You felt like things were slipping back into place. You started talking to stan too. Not much, only greetings in passing or a quick conversation about the kids here and there.
The only thing different was Ford wasn't the only person you found yourself able to talk to.
"You're really just going to forgive him like that!?" Bill voice echoed around your mind. You shrugged in response.
You began a weekly meeting with Bill. You found he was of good use. He let you vent about stan and Ford, being an interdemensinal being means having lots of cool powers that let you blow off steam.
Tonight was just a normal of one of these "hangouts"
"He wrote a whole, sincere apology...he was my friend at one point, and i even -"
You could see Bill make a disappointed expression. "After all he put you through!? After never once showing you any feeling, you're really going to pull "I even had feelings for him once." Card? He was a different man back then."
You sighed.
"Listen, I say don't trust it, he's always down in that basment, right!? He's not once invited you back there to help him he's hiding something from you. "
"Oh, like you'd know you don't exist outside of my mind! You wouldn't know what it's like with him."
"Believe me, I know more than you know... but if that's how you really feel..." He extended his hand a blue flame engulfing it.
"Lend me your body for a few hours, and I can prove to you that Stanford Pines doesn't have your best interest."
"Why!?" You asked recoiling from him. "Why do you care so much about Ford not being trust worthy?"
"C'mon y/n! Have I ever steered you wrong!?" You chewed on your lip thinking about it.
You just wanted to be certain you could let him back into your life. You thought about it.
Just to be certain, you agreed with yourself and shook his hand.
Ford stared at the contents of a jar while once again crawling in his notebook, though he wasn't even noting the creator on the page.
Ford found himself once again filling pages with your likeness. He'd forgotten the hold you actually had on him until you began opening back up to him.
He would admit he missed the you that used to love all the science and engineering. But he was particularly fond of the version you'd grown into. He hadn't realized, but most of his time was spent in a daze over you. He also found himself wondering what exactly your relationship with Stanley was. He knew you two still wheren not talking to eachother so he never got to ask.
He also feared he might not like what he heard, especially if it's what he thought it was between you two. He could feel jealous rise up in his chest when he thought about it. Which was ridiculous, of course. He wasn't here. Of course, you'd move on. You never stated the nature of your relationship with him when he was here. But that didn't change anything.
"Fordsy!.."He sat up right in right in his chair, blinking in shock at the call of your voice.
"Y/n!?" He quickly scattered, hiding the artwork from you.
"Uhm what are..what are you doing down here?"
He watched you walk in with your hands folded behind your back despite how you danced on the edge of shadow he could see something different about you.
Not just like the other good differences he's noticed in you.
"I just came to see you fordsy... "
His face flushed at the way you had said that.
"I..i.." You laughed.
It was different from your normal laugh. Between the flush you were causing him and the human voice. He would have never picked up on why it still sounded familiar.
You stepped into the small circle of light, closing a lot of space between you and Ford, your head hung low, as if you were embarrassed. "I have something to tell you sixer."
"Ye..yes? You can tell me anything!"
"I've always been kinda in love with you!" Before he could say anything, you leaned forward, throwing your whole body weight onto him, pushing him back against his desk.
Engulfing him in the deepest kiss, you could muster.holding his face in your hands. You pulled away a wild grin spread across your face. As you forced him to look at you.
"Did you miss me sixer!? Admit it, you missed me!!" You said rolling your eyes playfully, still smashing his face in your hands.
Ford nearly choked when your eyes met his.
"Do you like my new body sixer!?I picked it just for you!"
~~~~~~~~~~☆~~~~~~~~
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#ford pines#ford pines x reader#stan pines x reader#gravity falls x reader#stanford pines x reader#stanley pines x reader
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Hooked On A Feeling
Chapter Four - The Park
Daniel is a Formula One driver, but, more importantly, he was a single dad to a wonderful little girl. He wants her to be a normal little girl, to have a normal social life, so he sends her to daycare. That was where she met Milo, her future best friend.
Milo's mother was incredibly stressed. She worked so hard to provide a good life for her son. But then he makes a new friend, a friend who has a hot dad (ofc they fall in love)
1.6K
Single Dad!Daniel x Single Mum!Reader
i have literally no idea how custody works, so i feel like i've taken liberties with this
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Y/N parked her car and hopped out. She opened the back door and grabbed Milo from his car seat, buttoning up his little jacket. “Excited, Milo?” She asked as she took his hand and walked him along the grassy park, to where Daniel and Olivia were.
They were in the playpark, Daniel pushing Olivia on the swings. Y/N opened the gate to the park (fenced off to stop dogs from entering) and let Milo walk through. She held his hand as they walked over to them.
Spotting Olivia, Milo let go of his momma’s hand and went running towards her. He jumped into the swing beside her and started shouting ‘push me, momma!’
So, Y/N followed him over. She said a hello to Daniel and began pushing Milo on the swings. It became a competition between the kids to see who could go higher, but the parents are more concerned about their safety than some silly competition.
After they finished up on the swings, Olivia and Milo went running over to the slides. Y/N and Daniel sat down on one of the benches scattered around the playpark as Olivia and Milo chased each other down the slide.
Daniel was easy to converse with. The more Y/N learnt about him, the more she liked to spend time with him. He was an interesting guy, had an interesting life. She was beginning to love listening to him talk.
Eventually, the kids remembered that they were promised ice cream the day before. They slid down the slide and went running towards their parents. Milo grabbed a hold of his mother’s arm and jumped on the spot. “Ice cream, momma!” He shouted as Olivia did the same.
Daniel looked at Y/N, wearing a grin. He grabbed a hold of Olivia, placing her on his shoulders as he walked out of the part. Y/N couldn’t do the same with Milo. She held his hand and followed Daniel out of the park. “Momma, I want to go on your shoulders,” he said with a pout.
“Sorry, Milo,” she muttered as she picked him up and placed him on her hip. “What ice cream would you like, munchkin?”
“Chocolate!” Milo shouted.
Falling into step with Y/N and Milo, Daniel tried his best to look up at Olivia, still on his shoulders. “What about you, Badger?” He asked, bouncing her slightly.
“Hmm.” Olivia thought about it like it was the most serious question in the world, like the world depended on it. “Cherry,” she said. “Wait, vanilla. Wait, chocolate.”
In the end, Daniel bought Olivia a cherry flavoured ice cream. She skipped along happily with it while Milo ate his chocolate ice cream. “Do you want one?” Asked Daniel, his wallet still in his hands.
But Y/N shook her head. “Thanks though,” she said as the two of them followed the kids along.
While they ate their ice creams, Milo and Olivia walked around the park. Y/N and Daniel walked behind them, hands swinging lazily between them, almost close enough to touch. But they didn’t, not yet at least.
“Okay,” Y/N began. “Milo said you’re a race car driver. Is that true?”
Daniel let out a laugh. “You mean an F1 driver? Yeah, yes, I am,” he said, his grin growing wider.
“Seriously? I thought Milo was just making that up to make things sound more impressive,” she replied. “Like, last month Milo told some of the boys in his class that his dad is a famous football player to try and get them to like him.”
Daniel laughed, but it was a sad sort of laugh. He knew Milo to be a lovely boy, one that didn’t need to make up such things for friends. But he continued. “I swear to god, I’m an F1 driver. Have been for years now. It’s why my parents sometimes drop Olivia off at daycare.”
“Okay, prove it,” she said. “Tell me everything there is to know about F1.”
Daniel laughed. With his whole body, he laughed. He held his chest as he stopped walking and placed one of his hands on his knees. But then he got an idea. A brilliant idea. “How about, instead of telling you, I show you? Take you and Milo to a race?”
“Seriously?” Y/N asked, staring at him. “You’d seriously do that for us? we’re basically strangers.”
Daniel nodded his head. “Of course. Milo is Olivia’s best friend and I know she’d love to have him at a race with her.”
“Holy shit,” Y/N mumbled under her breath, not loud enough for the kids to hear. “Thank you, Daniel. Seriously.”
He just smiled in return. Because, before he got to say anything, Olivia came running over, pink ice cream all over her face. “Daddy,” she began as Y/N reached into her bag to pull out some tissues. She handed a packet to Daniel, who immediately began wiping Olivia’s face with it. “Milo has never seen the Cars movies.” She turned her attention to Y/N. “How have you never shown him the Cars movies?” She turned back to Daniel. “Can Milo come over to watch the car movies?”
Daniel picked her up and placed her on his hip as Milo ran over, chocolate all over his face. Y/N grabbed another packet of tissues and cleaned off Milo’s face. He protested, trying to avoid the tissues (but Y/N got him, holding him still to clean him off).
“Well, Badger, you’re at your mums next week and I’ve got another race. But I’m sure, if it’s okay with Miss L/N, that Milo can come over the week after,” Daniel said, gently swaying her from side to side.
Y/N did the same with her son, placing him on her hip. “What do you say, Milo? Do you wanna go to Mr Ricciardo’s house to watch Cars with Olivia?” Milo nodded his head eagerly. “Tell Mr Ricciardo, not me,” Y/N said gently.
“Yes please, Mr Ricciardo!” He said, excitedly.
The kids wiggled out of their parents grasps and went back to running around, chasing each other and playing tag. Olivia chased Milo across the path and across the grass, with Y/N and Daniel never very far behind.
“Maybe we should swap numbers, now that our kids are best friends,” Daniel said, his voice somewhat nervous.
Y/N nodded. “Definitely,” she said as she pulled out her phone. Daniel programmed his number into her phone, taking a quick picture of himself for the contact picture, and Y/N did the same (minus the picture). It was to make planning out playdates easier, they both reasoned. Daniel even made a joke about sending Y/N and Milo some AlphaTauri merchandise for when they came to watch him race (but, it wasn’t really a joke).
“Can I ask a kind of personal question?” Y/N asked as Daniel handed her phone back and they began walking again.
“I love it when you say that.”
Y/N couldn’t help but laugh. Daniel was funny and charismatic, always switched on. Y/N couldn’t help but laugh along with him. But then she asked her question. “Why is Olivia’s nickname Badger?”
Finally, a question Daniel was happy to answer. He was hyper aware as, when he began speaking, the back of his hand brushed against hers. “In Formula One, my nickname is the Honey Badger. Off the track I’m this happy, friendly guy, but on the track I’m vicious, like a honey badger. When my ex was pregnant with Oliva, my friend-“
“Another driver?”
“Another driver – he gave her the nickname little badger. She was the honey badger’s daughter, so it just made sense,” he finished, beaming. He loved talking about his job.
Y/N played with her fingers. “Can I ask another question?” She asked and Daniel nodded his head. “So, I remember you saying about your ex and the kind of things she does to Olivia when she’s there. Can’t you ask for full custody? Take her to the courts?”
It was something Daniel thought about a lot. His little girl was miserable when she was with her mother, of course he thought about it. But he knew taking her to court for custody of Olivia wouldn’t work, especially with his job. The fact that he was gone so often would probably be enough hand full custody of Olivia over to his ex.
So, Daniel told her this, in as little detail as possible. This was harder to talk about than his breakup with his ex. The thought of not seeing Olivia again was enough to send him to his knees, unable to breath. But he held it together as he talked to Y/N.
At the end of the playdate in the park, the four of them walked back to the car park. Olivia and Milo walked side by side, with their parents on either side of them. When it came time so say goodbye, the children held each other. They refused to let go as their parents pulled them apart.
“Good luck with your race,” said Y/N as she held Milo in her arms.
“Race? Momma, can we watch?” Milo asked suddenly, before Daniel could say anything.
Looking at Daniel, she nodded. The two said their goodbyes and got the kids into the cars, strapping them into the car seats and driving away.
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