#I've done flashcards

[shadowed-yet-vibrant]

Can a lawyer please tell me it's all going to be okay and I'm going to pass the bar exam next week?

[vilevampire]

I loaf technology

[airenyah]

i'm so tired bc i've been up since 7am and i'm running on about 5.5h of sleep, but there's 5 more slides to go sigh

[jareaul0ver]

Opposites Attract

Summary: You and Nika share a class and sit next to each other. Shes always teasing you, saying you're nerdy, while you always tease her, calling her a stereotypical jock.

wc: 1.6k warnings: none really, mostly fluff, a bit of enemies to lovers if you squint pairings: nika muhl x fem!reader

im trying this in a bit of a different style bc i feel like it fits the best! lmk if you guys like it or not

"What a nerd." "Nerd? At least I'm not a meathead."

When you first got paired with Nika for your class seating assignments, you were less than thrilled. Being with the class jock was not something you were looking forward to. You assumed she was all looks and brawn, no brain.

She felt the exact same way. She couldn't believe that she was stuck with some loser nerd. At least she'd have you to rely on for projects when basketball kept her too busy, and left her too exhausted to do anything but collapse in her bed.

You were working on your first project together, and you decided to meet up in the library. When Nika finally arrived, you had your laptop out and your nose in a book. She, on the other hand, was sweaty and exhausted from practice.

"Sorry I'm late. Coach had us run at the end of practice." She plopped her bag into the chair next to her and sat down.

"Mm, alright." You mumbled, keeping focus on the project.

She stared at you for a moment before sighing. "Are you gonna end up doing this whole thing all yourself?"

You tore your eyes away from your screen and stopped typing to look at her. "Not if you show up on time tomorrow."

She rolled her eyes. "Can't help it if practice runs late."

You scoffed. "You could've texted me, we could've rescheduled."

"Whatever." She muttered as she pulled her laptop out of her bag and opened it up to the document you were busy typing away at. Her eyes widened when she saw almost a whole page finished already. "You've done this much in the twenty minutes I wasn't here?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Jesus, what a nerd."

You deadpanned. "Nerd? At least I'm not a meathead."

She took a deep breath and shook her head before forcing herself to focus on the project, the two of you being civil for your rest of the time in the library.

"Nerd." "Meathead." "Dork." "Jock."

You smiled at Nika as she sat down next to you. She flashed a bright smile at you. "Hey, nerd."

Your eyes rolled playfully. "Hey, meathead."

Your class started and the professor taught her lesson. Nika thought it would be better to mess with you than pay attention, though. She scribbled something messily on a sticky note and stuck it right onto your notes page.

You sighed and read it. 'wanna hang out later?'

She glanced at you with a hopeful smile as you quickly wrote something back, passing it back over to her. 'can't. studying and homework for other classes :('

Nika drew a frowny face and passed it back to you. You smiled a little at it, and resumed taking notes. But she wasn't finished.

She pulled out another sticky note and wrote on it again, passing it back over to you. 'pleaseeeee? i know you wanna'

A long sigh escaped your lips as you wrote an answer and gave it back to her. 'i have too much to do tonight, sorry. and pay attention before you flunk out'

She smiled and whispered to you. "I'm not gonna flunk out, I've got my favorite dork to help me."

You shook your head. "I'm not a dork, first of all. Second, you're such a stereotypical jock, always asking the smart kid in class for help."

A quite laugh escaped her lips. It sounded like a melody to your ears.

Your professor didn't find it as endearing as you did, however. "Girls, focus." Her eyes landed on the two of you before she turned back around.

The two of you giggled together quietly.

Later than night, you were doing exactly what you told Nika you would be. A mountain of papers and books surrounded you on the floor. You had flashcards laid out everywhere. You were drowning in work, and you were ready for a break, but you only had to study for one more class.

Fortunately a break soon arrived when you heard knocking on your door. You stood up with a groan and walked over, the hair in your ponytail practically falling out, bags under your eyes from the countless hours of work you've done today.

You opened the door and Nika was standing there, a plastic takeout bag in her hand. "Thought you'd need a break tonight, I brought food."

You stared at her for a moment before smiling and pulling her inside. "You are a godsend, Nika Muhl." You grabbed the bag from her hand and set it on your desk.

Nika stood behind you, looking at all your studying materials sprawled on the floor. "Jesus, how long have you been doing this for?"

"Uh, a few hours. Nothing too bad."

"A few hours? Without a break?" She scoffed.

You turned around and looked at her. "How did you know I haven't taken a break?"

She grinned at you as she took in your appearance. "By just looking at you." You were disheveled and simply looked exhausted.

"Wow, rude." You feigned offense and placed your hand on your chest.

She laughed softly and took a step towards you. "But seriously, you need a break. You're gonna wear yourself out." She brushed a lose strand of hair out of your face.

"Guess all that studying together paid off, hm?" "Guess so. Maybe hanging with a nerd isn't that bad."

It was finals week and you had been working your ass off. Late night after late night of studying with Nika had you both prepared for your exam.

Per Nika's rules, you had to take a mandatory fifteen minute break every forty-five minutes. She refused to let you overwork yourself, and for once, you agreed. You could tell she was exhausted too. She was balancing academics and her playoff games, on top of hours long practices.

You had also implemented a reward system. While doing flashcards, for every three questions one of you got right, you got to ask the other person a question. That was when you found out Nika was gay.

"That's three, I get to ask you something now." You stared at her as you sat across from her on the floor of her dorm.

"Go for it." She smiled at you.

You thought for a moment. You had already asked her about Croatia, her teammates and friends, but not anything romantically. "Ooh, I got one. Do you have a boyfriend? Or are your eyes on any guy in particular?"

She stared at you for a moment before laughing. Your brows furrowed. "What? Why are you laughing?"

"It's just funny." She took a deep breath. "How you looked at me and thought I was straight."

Your lips parted. "You're..?" She nodded. "Oh." You squeaked quietly, your face heating up. "I-I didn't mean to assume, I just figured... y'know."

"I don't think I do."

You sighed. "I just assumed you only liked guys, I dunno."

"Well I don't." She smiled. "Only like guys, that is."

"Right." You smiled a little back at her, your gazes lingering on the others for a moment too long to be considered only friendly. You cleared your throat and looked down at the notecard in your hand. "Back to studying."

She didn't look away from you. She couldn't pull her eyes away from you.

It was the day that exam test scores were going to be released. You sat anxiously in the lecture hall, in your regular seat next to Nika. Your leg was bobbing up and down as the professor explained that only two students exceled with her exam, and you prayed that one of them was you.

Nika had her eyes on you, analyzing everything you were doing. She noticed the bobbing of your leg, but also the tight grip you held on your phone, and the way your bottom lip was caught between your teeth.

"Hey." She said quietly as she reached out, placing her hand on your knee to help calm you down. Your gaze darted up to meet hers, and her expression was soft. "I promise that you did amazing."

You swallowed nervously. "But what if I didn't? What if I totally bombed it and-"

She gently squeezed your leg. "You didn't bomb it. I know you didn't. Take a deep breath." You did. You inhaled deeply and closed your eyes as you let it out. "There you go."

She wrapped her arm around your shoulder and you relaxed a bit at her touch. You leaned your head against her, closing your eyes, and hoping for the best.

The professor called everyone down one by one, handed them the paper with their grade, and dismissed them from the class to look at it. Nika had already been called, and when you were, it took you a second to snap back into reality.

You went down and collected your paper, then quickly left the room. You rounded a corner and saw no one around you, unsure of where Nika disappeared to.

You took a deep breath before opening the paper and looking at your grade. You had gotten a 98, the highest grade in the class. You let out the breath you were holding and leaned your head back. "Thank god." You said quietly.

"Everything okay?" Nika's voice came from behind you.

You spun around with a smile on your face. "I got a 98!"

She smiled at you before moving forward and wrapping her arms around you, pulling you into a hug. "Holy shit! I got a 93!" You hugged her back and smiled brightly against her neck.

You pulled back to look at her, and in a wave of emotions, crashed your lips against hers. She froze for a second before reciprocating the kiss, causing you to stumble backwards a bit.

The both of you giggled and your rested your foreheads against each other's. "Guess all that studying together paid off, hm?" You grinned.

"Guess so." She pecked your lips. "Maybe hanging with a nerd isn't that bad."

i really hope you guys like this one!! i loved writing this sm that i wrote it practically within the same sitting on the same day that I got the request. thank you anon for sending this in!!

[mattybsgroupie]

MASTERLIST

— open here to read my stories ♡⊹𑄽୧

ABOUT ME

hello! my name is maria, i'm 21 and a matt girl for life. i became a fan of the triplets last year, but only had the guts to write again a few months ago and i'm so thankful i've been receiving great feedbacks from you guys and having such a good time here in this community.

i do not talk very often here cause it’s mainly for my stories, but i am online everyday at @bimboparis, my main account! that’s where i’ll be liking and following you guys from! im pretty chill and silly so feel free to dm me whenever you wanna chat! :) i don’t bite (unless you want me to)

i only write smut and the only rule in my blog is that i don’t do drama. i won’t be participating in any of it, so don’t even bother putting my name out there or inboxing me with gossip. if you have any issues with me please reach out and we’ll immediately fix it. my dms are always open so if there’s anything i’ve done that somehow bothered you, please let me know. i’m here to post fanfics and have a good time, that’s all.

♡⊹𑄽୧

MATT STURNIOLO

SUB!MATT

 MINE ➳ when matt claims that you’re only his, you show him he’s also gotta be only yours. ♡

LATE NIGHT RIDES 1 ➳ you and matt have some fun in his van while waiting for his brothers at a party.

LATE NIGHT RIDES 2 ➳ you and matt know you shouldn’t be doing this so often, but matt just can’t resist you in that dress.

MISBEHAVE ➳ matt kept calling you “mama” because he wanted your attention, even if that meant being punished later. ♡

PRETTY ➳ matt needs reassurance after reading nasty comments about his looks, and you make sure to show your boy just how pretty he is.

SLEEPOVER ➳ you and matt can’t fall asleep, and him calling you “mommy” definitely didn’t help.

HOMEWORK ➳ matt is the smartest guy in class, and you’ve been needing some help with your homework. ♡

SECRET ➳ matt finds out you have a dildo and wants to see if you can fuck him as good as he fucks you.

MOVIES ➳ you and matt have fun at the same movie theater you started dating as kids. ♡

ASSIGNMENT ➳ matt is a very good tutor, but he’s getting distracted by how short your skirt is.

CRY ➳ matt just looks so pretty when he cries.

♡⊹𑄽୧

DOM!MATT

FIRSTS ➳ after a rough week, matt gives you a massage that leads to your first time. ♡

TAPE ➳ you lost the flashcard where matt kept all of your intimate moments and as your punishment, you're recording a sex tape on a new one. ♡

TRIP ➳ after going to las vegas, matt misses you more than you’d imagined.

CALL ➳ matt can’t keep his mouth shut after seeing your new lingerie set. he needed to see you wearing it, even if it’s through a video call. ♡

MORNINGS ➳ waking up to a needy matt and having slow, sleepy sex with him.

BIRHTDAY ➳ after not celebrating his birthday, matt punishes you, even when you wear his favorite lingerie.

SECRET 2 ➳ matt knows you love his cock, but he also knew you had a good time with your dildo. he wants to fuck you with both.

JEALOUS ➳ matt can’t help it. he’s just a jealous guy.

♡⊹𑄽୧

CHRIS STURNIOLO

DOM!CHRIS

DRESS ➳ chris gives you a helping hand when your earring gets stuck on your dress.

♡⊹𑄽୧

NEXT WORKS

CAUGHT ➳ matt needed you so much he didn’t mind the risk of getting caught.

ATTITUDE ➳ you and matt never clicked well. this until you guys had to spend a whole night sleeping on the same bed.

HELP ➳ you’re a virgin — chris isn’t. he wants to help you with that.

BEACH ➳ chris can’t help it, you just look too good in that tiny bikini.

♡⊹𑄽୧

if you want to be tagged in my new stories, please leave a 🌸 emoji in the comments down below!

requests are always open — i might take some time to post but i’ll definitely write it, please be patient with me. same goes for my inbox and dms, come talk to me whenever you want!

fics tagged with a ♡ are my favorite works!

asks, requests and chats are under the #ask maria tag!

blurbs and drabbles are under the #maria’s blurbs tag!

THANK YOU ♡

[alotofpockets]

Breaking point | Reneé Rapp x Reader

Where Reneé comforts you after exam season gets the better of you

Warnings: reader has anxiety, adhd, and an ed. If there any inaccuracies please let me know!

Reneé masterlist | Words: 1.5k

-----

Exam season was hated by most, and rightfully so. The stress put on students to learn everything the semester was for not just one subject, but all of them in the matter of a few weeks, was an insane amount. For you it wasn’t just stressful, it was almost impossible.

You had been at it for weeks now, sitting at your desk and trying to get the information in your brain. At this point you wondered what the use was. No matter how long you stared at the pages, none of the words you read stuck. Your ADHD was making it harder to focus than ever. Every noise, or glimpse of something in the corner of your eye, pulled your focus away.

The room was a mess. Textbooks, notes and flashcards were scattered not just on your desk but across the floor. Usually your chaos had some organisation to it, but now it was all just laying somewhere random. You cursed yourself for straying from your usual organisation, cause you couldn’t find anything, which only fueled your anxiety more.

On your desk also stood four half-full glasses with different contents, all started but long forgotten about before getting a new one. That seemed to be your pattern these days, starting something, then getting distracted and never finishing it. 

Food was a whole new topic. Your girlfriend had brought you a plate of food for breakfast earlier today. The gesture was really sweet, but even the thought of taking a bite was too much. Your mind convinces you that you didn’t deserve to eat until you retained some of the knowledge. Even though you were well aware that your body needed the nutritions, your brain kept you in the constant cycle of not being worthy of a meal.

You stared at the pages before you, and all the words blended together. This was no use. All subjects merged together, and you didn't think you could ever make sense of any of it. Your chest tightened as your mind started racing again. I am a failure. I can’t do this. Why can’t I just focus like everyone else? The more you tried to calm yourself down, the worse it got.

Before you knew it, your frustration boiled over. With a huff, you swipe your desk clean, sending everything crashing to the floor. The clash of your drink glasses and plates breaking onto the floor, matched with the scream you let out in frustration, makes your girlfriend rush into the room.

Reneé finds you on the floor with tears streaming down your face, trying to pick up the broken glass. “Baby?” She said softly, keeping her voice calm, even though her worry was still noticeable in her tone.

You look up at her with tears in your eyes. “I can't do this anymore.”, you sobbed. Reneé crouched down beside you, and took your hands in hers. “It's okay. Let's take a break, alright?” You shake your head, “I can't. I have to keep going.” The words echoing in your mind all rush out. “I have to get this done. I am running out of time. I can’t fail this.”

Reneé takes your hands in hers, a way to give comfort, but also to make sure you wouldn't cut yourself. “I know, darling,” Reneé said softly, her voice steady as she looked into your eyes. “But right now, you’re too frustrated. That’s not going to help you focus. You need a break, just to breathe, okay?”

You don't respond, but stop resisting, so Reneé stands up slowly. “Come on, I'll run you a bath to relax.” You let her help you up and fall into her arms. “I've got you baby.” She walks you to the bathroom, and helps you get ready for the bath. “Just try to clear your mind for a moment, I will be right back.” She placed a soft kiss onto your forehead before she left the bathroom.

With your eyes closed, you tried to push down the way your mind was racing. It took a while but then all of a sudden your mind was quiet, and you let the tension leave your body, and lay back in the bathtub.

In your study room, Reneé carefully cleaned up the broken glass. When all of the broken pieces had been thrown away, she took a look around the room, and realised that there was no order to your chaos. She knew you well enough to know that this wasn’t your system, and also good enough to know what was. She spent some time organising your notes as best as she could before she deemed the room ready.

She had also seen the untouched plate of food, and realised that you were probably struggling with it more again. Reneé had been there through the ups and downs of your eating disorder. You had been doing quite well with it recently, having it under control most days, but she should’ve known that the amount of stress you were feeling would affect that control.

Before she heads back to the bathroom, she heads into the kitchen and prepares some toast. Toast was the most likely item of food for you to be able to eat, and she hoped that today was one of those days where your mind would allow you to have at least a couple of bites.

She lets out a sigh of relief when she walks in and sees you have been able to let go of some of the stress. “Hi baby.” She lets her hand fall over yours as she kneels down besides the bath. You open your eyes slowly, “Thank you.” Reneé always knew what you needed, and you would forever be grateful that she would take care of you in your lowest moments.

Reneé had grabbed you some comfy clothes, and had gotten into some herself as well. You got dressed and she brushed your hair for you. “I made some toast, if you would like to have some. If not, we can just sit in the kitchen for a bit and talk.” You nodded in agreement, knowing that you needed some time away from the study room before you would be able to have any luck in retaining any of the information.

You took a look at the toast, and your mind had already decided that taking a break was more than enough of a freebie, so eating wasn’t going to be allowed either. To try and distract yourself from that fact, you chatted with your girlfriend. 

While getting distracted was usually something that frustrated you, getting distracted by your girlfriend had a different effect. It was easier to focus on her, when she talked about something she loved with nothing but passion, it was like you got sucked right in.

Without even realising it, you had taken a couple of bites of your toast, while listening to Reneé talk about a song she had started working on earlier today. Reneé noticed, but was quick to hide her proud smile, to not put the focus on that in the hopes of you getting a few more bites in.

It was only when you went to grab another piece of toast, and there was nothing left on your plate, that you realised you had been eating. “Wait, I just did that?” Now Reneé openly showed her proud smile, “You did.”

You looked at your plate in disbelief. “I can’t believe I just did that.” Having a meal without thinking about it was not something that often happened. “I’m proud of you darling.” She reached out her hand over the table and held yours.

“I know it’s a big ask, but what do you say we take the rest of the day off and just do some relaxing?” Your eyes shot up at her, and she knew instantly that she had to convince you further. “Movie night now, so you can be all recharged for tomorrow. I can even help you study like before? You can focus on my voice while I read out the information for you. How does that sound?” It took a lot out of you to agree, but you did. “Okay, you go get comfy in bed and pick a movie, and I will clean this up really quickly.” 

A few minutes later Reneé joined you in the bed and the two of you cuddled up together. “Thank you for always taking care of me.” You say softly. “Of course, I will always take care of my girl.”

While the exam season wasn’t over yet, you knew that the break tonight was necessary to push forward tomorrow. With that thought in mind, you were able to push away the stress you were having momentarily and enjoy the movie with your girlfriend.

-----

💗 If you enjoyed this fic, please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging! You can also supporting me by leaving a tip 💗

[study-coffee-chicago]

Glasses (A Halstead Brothers + Halstead Sister Imagine)

A/N: Thank you so much for reading and for sticking around with my sporadic posting! Please don't forget to vote and comment! 

I start my second year of my doctoral program next week and have been working 60 hrs/wk these past few weeks to save up for when I have less time during the school year. I don't know when I will post next, but I have an idea that I want to write and I've also been trying to write 300 words/day, which is very helpful in getting writing done. 

Anyway, sorry for the long author's note! Enjoy!

"You gonna go see my teacher now?" you asked after you and Jay walked into your elementary school one spring evening.

"Yup," Jay answered while he led you over to the small table set up right outside the room. It was stocked with coloring pages, markers, crayons, and a couple of books. "And you're going to sit right here while I talk to her, okay? I'll be right inside."

"And then we get ice cream after?"

"What was our deal?"

You sighed. "If I get a good re- re--" you scrunched up your eyebrows as you tried to remember the grown-up word that Jay had used earlier. "What's that word?"

"Report."

"Oh, yeah! If I get a good report, then I get ice cream."

"That's right."

"Mr. Halstead?" your teacher said as she stepped out of your classroom.

"Hi, Miss H!" You waved. "Please tell Jay I was good because I get ice cream then!"

Jay chuckled. "You'll just have to wait and see, kiddo. Now, be good while I talk to Miss H, okay?"

"Okay!" Then, you started flipping through the coloring pages to try and find one that you wanted to color.

***

"So, tell me the truth, is she a troublemaker?" Jay asked as he sat down across from your teacher. "I know for a fact me and my brother were, so it wouldn't surprise me."

You teacher smiled. "Y/N is anything but that. She does her work as assigned, gets her planner signed at night, and stays on task very well. She struggles with math, but that's understandable. Some take longer to learn math than others. But, she excels at reading. She said that you read with her and do flashcards with her every night."

Jay nodded. "We're working through The Chronicles of Narnia right now. Me, my wife, Hailey, or my brother, Will, will read that to her before she goes to bed, depending on who's with her due to our schedules. Then, the next night, we'll have her try and read to us. She's working on Junie B. Jones."

"Well, it's working. And, she's making more progress in her mad minutes for math than she was a month ago. Do you work on flashcards every day?"

"We try to," Jay answered. "Those we try to do right after school and give her a snack with it. Some would call it bribery, but it works."

"Keep doing what you're doing. It's been working really well." She paused. "There is one thing that has been concerning me about, Y/N." Jay furrowed his eyebrows as he continued to listen. "When we move seats for groups during partner reading and other times during the day, I noticed that she struggles to read what's on the board. Sometimes she'll squint really hard and sometimes she'll walk up to the board to write in her planner at the end of the day. I've moved her to the front row for class, but when we move for groups and she's further away from the board, it seems that it's hard for her to see. Do you have the time and money to get her eyes checked? If not, we have vision testing coming to school in a month, which is free and required for all students," your teacher finished.

"My brother's a doctor, and we'll make sure to see her pediatrician about this. It's getting close to her yearly physical anyway. Thank you for telling me. Is there any other times that you notice this?"

"During library days, she always makes sure to sit in the front so she can she the pictures better. I'm sorry. I wish I had more information to give you."

"No, thank you for telling me this. I know you have a lot of other kids to look out for. Is there anything else I should know? Behavior wise, she's good, right?"

"Very well behaved. The only thing I was concerned about is her vision."

"Great. Thank you again for telling me."

"You're welcome. Is there anything else you needed to discuss regarding Y/N?"

"No," Jay answered. "I'll get out of your hair now then. You've probably got more parents to see."

"I do. Have a good night."

"You, too," Jay replied and then made his way to the door and out into the hallway.

Your head shot up the second you heard the door open. "I was good, right?" you asked.

"You weren't good-"

You dropped your head. No ice cream. "But-"

"You were great, kiddo!" Jay exclaimed.

"Ice cream!" you cheered.

Jay squatted down to your height and looked at the picture you were coloring. "That's really pretty and you're almost done. So, how about instead of going out for ice cream, I call Will and have him pick up ice cream sundae stuff and we can make them at home. That way, you can finish your picture at home."

"Can we watch a movie, too?"

Jay looked at his watch. 5:33. You'd have time to watch a Disney movie before bedtime. "If you start it right when we get home, then yes, you can watch a movie."

"Yay!"

"Now, stay here for a couple more minutes while I go call Will, okay? And, what's my rule?"

"If I have to go somewhere and can't tell you, tell a good adult." Jay had taught it to you as trusted adult, but you couldn't remember that word, so you always said good adult.

"That's right. I'll be right back."

Then, he made his way all the way down the hallway and turned the corner and continued walking until he was sure that you weren't within earshot to call Will.

He picked up on the first ring.

"If you need help disciplining her based on a bad report, that's all you, Jay. You're the disciplinarian and I'm the fun brother."

Jay rolled his eyes. "It's not that. She did great, but her teacher said that she might need glasses. She said she struggles to see the board. Think you could check her out tonight?"

"Jay, she needs to go to an optometrist for that."

"I know, but can't you just do some preliminary stuff? Also, she wants you to come over for ice cream sundaes and a movie, so you'd be there anyway."

"Who says I don't have plans?"

"C'mon, man. I know you."

"Fine, I'll be there in 30 minutes. You need me to pick anything up? Maybe a pizza? Can't just give the kid ice cream for dinner, but you know that."

"If you bring pizza, at least bring a salad with it," Jay bargained.

"Deal. See you in 30. And, I'll put in a call to her pediatrician on the way to your place."

"Perfect. Thanks, man. See you later."

Then, Jay hung up the phone and walked back over to you. "Ready to go?"

"Yes! Ice cream!"

"Ice cream is right. Let's go, kiddo."

Then, you two made your way to his truck and went to the store to buy everything you, Jay, Will, and Hailey would need for ice cream sundaes. And, Jay kept an eye on you to see if you were squinting. But, it was a bit difficult because he was making a mental checklist and checking everything off while you two were in the store. He figured he'd investigate more when you got home.

***

When you got back, you quickly put on your Tangled pajamas and told Jay that was the movie you wanted to watch.

Then, you grabbed your stool from under the sink while Jay was in the living room getting the movie pulled up. Your hand was on the handle to the freezer and you were just about to open it when Jay walked back in.

"And what do you think you're doing, missy?" You turned around to face him and it was like you were a deer in the headlights. "Were you trying to get ice cream before dinner?"

"Maybe..." you answered slowly.

"That's what I thought. Now, how about you get down and start your movie so that you can finish it before bedtime? Will will be here soon and then I'll bring your food to you."

"I get to eat in the living room?" Jay almost never let you eat in the living room! You always had to eat at the table!

"If you eat over your plate, you can eat in the living room. But, if you start being messy, it's right back to the table."

"Okay!" You jumped down from your stool, put it away, and then made your way to the couch in the living room. You grabbed your favorite fuzzy blanket from the back of the couch and then hit play on the remote.

Jay chuckled and reached into the cabinet where he hid the stickers for your sticker chart. Then, he placed one on the line next to the chore that said Clean up when asked - No arguing.

Even though he didn't ask you to put your step stool away, you still did it. And, maybe he was giving you this because he felt guilty about not noticing that you were struggling to see. Either way, you were one step closer to getting a prize.

Five minutes later, Will walked in with the pizza.

"Will!" you exclaimed and jumped up off the couch and ran up to him. "My teacher said I was really good!"

"I heard that! Now let me put this down and then I can give you a big hug. And I even got you your own pizza!"

"You did?"

"Yes, I did, silly!"

"Jay, did you hear that? Will got me my own pizza! That way I don't have to pick the gross onions and black olives off yours."

"I did! Now, let's let Will put down the pizza, hmm?" Jay said and grabbed your hand to gently pull you out of the way.

You moved out of the way, allowing Will to set the pizza boxes on the table. Then, he crouched down and gave you a bone-crushing hug.

"Stop! Too tight!" you laughed, making Will just squeeze you harder while Jay tried his best to contain his laughter at the two of you.

"Alright, you two, Let's eat before the pizza gets cold. Y/N, go wash your--"

Jay was cut off by the door opening and you squealing.

"Hailey!"

You wriggled out of Will's hold and ran up to her. "Guess what?! Guess what?! Guess what?!"

"Guess we know who her favorite is," Will muttered.

"What?" Hailey asked with a giant smile on her face. She was also holding a pink box that you noticed sort of smelled like cookies.

"I did really good at school so I get pizza and ice cream sundaes!"

"I know! Jay told me! So, I thought we could have brownie sundaes!"

She moved toward the table and set down the pink box. Then, she opened the box, revealing fresh, warm brownies from the bakery a block from the district.

You reached for one, but Jay quickly swatted your hand away. "Nuh-uh. Dinner first, missy."

Jay then put your personal pizza on a plate along with a breadstick, baby carrots, and some ranch for you to dip the carrots in. He handed you the plate along with some napkins.

"Go ahead and watch Tangled while you eat, okay? We'll be in there soon."

"Okay!"

The minute Jay heard the movie playing again, he was all business. "So, how are we doing this, Will?"

Jay didn't need to explain to Hailey what he was referring to here because he texted her that you had gotten a good report, but that your teacher also said that you needed glasses after he called Will when you were at school.

"I called her pediatrician and she can see her on Friday. She said that if she does need glasses, the optometrist should be able to get her on Monday."

"Perfect, great. Me and Hailey both work Monday, so you can take her, right?"

"I can take her," Will confirmed.

"Okay, good."

"So, in the meantime, what do we do?" Hailey asked.

"I'm just gonna watch to see if she squints at all during the movie. Maybe if you guys take her to the park tomorrow ask her to see things that are far away, like, Hey! Look at that cool bird! or something and see if she squints or not. Can't really do much until she goes to the optometrist," Will answered.

"You guys are missing Flynn get hit with a frying pan!" you yelled.

"I blame you for her love of violence, Jay," Will joked.

"Coming!" Jay yelled. "Just a sec, kiddo!"

Then, the adults filled their plates and made their way to the living room.

***

Monday afternoon

Will was going to kill his brother. When you got in the car, he asked if you were ready to go. To where, you had no idea. So, you had asked if you were going home.

"No, to the doctor, silly. To get your eyes looked at," Will answered.

"But I already did that! No more, please! Wanna go home!"

Will sighed but continued driving. "Why don't you want to go to the doctor, kiddo?"

"Because I don't want shots! I didn't get shots last time, so I gotta get shots now! Don't want 'em!" you cried.

"Oh, no, no, no," Will quickly soothed. "No shots. They're just going to look at your eyes. Then, you have to tell them which picture is easier to see and what letter you're looking at."

"Really? No shots?"

"No shots," Will confirmed.

"And I get French fries after?"

Will took a deep breath. Did he want to have an argument with you while driving and then end up either in an accident or late to your appointment because he had to pull over? No. Neither of those sounded particularly appealing. So, he went with the safest option.

"Yes, we can get French fries after."

***

"Y/N Halstead," the optometrist called after you had been sitting at the office for ten minutes.

You stood up and so did Will and you quickly grabbed his hand, letting him know that he would be coming into that room with you no matter what.

"I'm not going anywhere, kiddo."

"I just making sure," you told him, causing him to chuckle lightly.

You walked into an office with a weird thing hanging from the ceiling. There were lots of different circles and it was really big. There was a chair in front of it, too.

While the doctor started talking to you, he lowered the chair. "So, Y/N, I hear you're having a little trouble seeing the board at school, hmm?"

You shrugged. "A little. But only when I'm far away."

"And that's okay. What I'm going to do is help you see better. I'm going to lower down this machine--I know it looks big, but it's not scary, I promise--. Then, I'm going to have you read some letters to me."

"Like I did the other day at the doctor's?" you asked as you looked up at Will.

"Exactly like you did the other day," he confirmed. "Now you just look into special stuff so we know exactly what glasses you need." Then, he quickly turned to the optometrist. "Sorry. I'm Dr. Will Halstead, an ED doc at Chicago Med. Also her older brother."

"He said I gotta go to someone else for my eyes, but he's a doctor," you said to the optometrist.

The optometrist laughed and then shook your brother's hand. "Well, he's right." Then, he got down to your level and said in a stage whisper, "and between you and me, I probably know more about eyes than him."

"Really? I didn't think anyone was smarter than Will!"

"Really. Now let's take a look at those eyes." He moved over to his chair and then had you look into the glass circles. "Now, read me the smallest letter you can see."

***

"How'd it go?" Jay asked when you and Will walked into his apartment. Then, he spotted the McDonald's bag. "Seriously?"

"Only way she was gonna go. You sure she doesn't listen to your interrogations at the district? She had to have learned blackmail from somewhere."

"Haha, very funny. Did it go well, kiddo?"

"Yeah, I had to look at these pictures and tell the not Will doctor what one looked better," you answered.

Jay held back a laugh at your description of the doctor. "Did you pick out any glasses?"

"Yeah, I got purple. Can I eat my food now?"

"Go wash your hands and then you can."

You ran off to go wash your hands so that you could eat your chicken nuggets and fries and then Jay turned to Will.

"She been like this all day?" Jay asked.

"Doesn't help when she has no idea what's going and I have to tell her thirty minutes before the appointment, Jay," Will quipped.

"Fries and nuggies!" you yelled as you ran out of the bathroom after washing your hands, which effectively cut your brothers' conversation about your lack of excitement to see clearly short.

***

3 days later, Thursday.

"You ready to pick up your glasses, kiddo?" Jay asked as you got in his truck in the pickup line at school.

You simply shrugged. "Yeah," was all you answered.

Today at school, during soccer at recess, a boy's glasses fell off and then someone accidentally stepped on them and broke them when you were playing! What if that happened with your glasses? What if you couldn't play soccer anymore because you wore glasses?

You loved soccer ever since you had started playing it last year. And, you and Jay always practiced on Sunday mornings at the park. And, when it was nice out, you two would always have a picnic. It was always a Jay and Y/N date (sometimes Hailey would come along, but only if you agreed to it). That time was sacred for you and Jay because of his demanding job, but what if you didn't get to do that anymore all because you needed stupid glasses to see the stupid board at stupid school?

"How was school?" Jay asked. He knew by your demeanor that your mood was more sour than it had been this morning, and he'd prefer to discuss it now than have you blow up at home. One would be shocked at how much anger you could hole up and spew out from your little body.

"It was good. Same old, same old."

Jay rolled his eyes. You had definitely picked up that saying from Will. "Do anything fun?" he probed. "Was recess good?"

"I played soccer during first and second recess, but I didn't score at all. Stupid boys. They're always faster than me."

If you hadn't added the last part, then Jay would probably have told you that boys have cooties anyway and to stay away from them until you're thirty. But, you did say that last part, so he knew he had to be comforting.

"Well, you gotta remember, you like playing defense, so what do I always tell you?"

"I gotta outsmart 'em...and slide tackle."

Last Jay checked that was illegal in kids' soccer. "I don't think me or Will ever taught you about slide tackling. Where'd you learn about that, kiddo?"

"Adam taught me when he took me to the park when you had to talk to some bad guys yesterday."

"Of course he did," Jay muttered. "Just remember, you can only do that to me, Will, or Adam. Don't try and do that to other people, okay?"

He knew that he should probably tell you to never do that, but eh, he figured he'd let you have a little fun. And, it wasn't like he never got kicked out of games for doing a slide tackle...okay, maybe multiple slide tackles in a game with one leading to the other team's captain getting a concussion.

"Okay," you answered. "I'm not good at 'em anyway."

Jay chuckled. "And let's keep it that way."

***

Jay was both happy and frustrated when he watched you put on your glasses and see the world clearly for the first time in who knows how long. He was frustrated because how could he have not noticed this? Hell, how could Will not have noticed this? And, he was happy as he watched your mouth fall slightly agape and mutter whoa to yourself.

After you made sure that your glasses fit and the optometrist did all the necessary checks, you made your way back to Jay's truck.

"I gotta stop at the district to pick up some paperwork," Jay said as he began driving. "You ready to show off your glasses to everyone?"

"Yes!" you exclaimed. You loved the color of your glasses and everything was so pretty! Nothing was blurry anymore!

When you walked into the district, you were first met with Trudy, who didn't see you at first.

"Looking for this, Chuckles? You left it here earlier and you and me both know that Voight will have your—" And then she noticed you and quickly shut her mouth before she swore in front of you.

"Good catch, sarge," Jay said and took the manilla folder from her.

"Y/N, I didn't know you had glasses! They look so pretty! So much better than my old lady ones," Trudy complimented.

Then, you heard someone coming down the stairs.

"So if I call you old—"

"Shut it, Ruzek," she snapped as Adam strode over to you.

"And, she's back. Thanks, man," Jay complained.

"I was just telling Y/N here how pretty her glasses were before you ever so impolitely interrupted," Trudy said to Adam.

Then, Adam crouched down to your height. "My, my. They sure are pretty." Then, he held up three fingers. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Adam!" you laughed. "That's not how they work."

"But I thought that's how glasses worked. How about you tell me how they do work?"

"I just can't see far away. You gotta back up and do that."

He did so and then reached into his pocket.

"So, can you read this?"

"Oreos! I can read the words now!"

That stopped Jay in his tracks. "What do you mean by that, kiddo?"

"I can read the words from far away now and not just close by me. It's because I have my glasses now, duh."

Adam almost burst out laughing at your sass, but held back his laughter when he saw Jay's death stare directed right at him.

"Right, of course, silly me," Jay answered quickly. "Go get your Oreos from Adam and then we can go upstairs and show everyone else your glasses, how's that sound?"

"Okay!" you excitedly ran up to Adam and he handed you the Oreos. "Thank you!"

"You're very welcome!"

You started towards the stairs and Jay quickly whispered to Adam, "Boards flipped?"

"Did it before I walked down here since I heard her voice."

"Great, thanks."

"Jay! You gotta put your hand here to open it because I'm not special enough to put my hand here!" you exclaimed.

"Okay, okay, hold on a sec," he said and then gently pushed you to the side to put his hand on the palm scanner. The door beeped and then he pulled the door open. "Ladies first."

You walked in and immediately everyone's heads turned towards you.

"Y/N!" Hailey exclaimed "You got your glasses!"

"Yeah! Everything looks so much better and so pretty!" You took a moment to look around the bullpen. Despite being in this room with Jay and Hailey for two years now off and on since your dad died, you could finally see it clearly. You thought everything was always a little blurry around the edges.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" Voight asked from the back of the bullpen near his office.

"Three!" you yelled confidently.

"That's right! Wow, she counts faster than you, Ruzek."

Jay held back a laugh while Adam exclaimed, "Why you gotta be like that, Boss?"

"Because it's true. You got the paperwork, Halstead?"

"Right here. I'll get out of your hair now because it's my RDO and I do not want to be here on my day off. C'mon, Y/N, let's go home."

"But I didn't see Kevin or Kim yet!" you whined.

"They're out doing police work, kiddo. You can see them later, okay?"

"But I want to show them my glasses!"

Hailey quickly saw the temper tantrum that was about to erupt and stood up. "How about I take a picture of you with your glasses and send it to them? Then you can see what they say when I get home tonight. How does that sound, Y/N?"

You nodded and walked closer to her. "Yes!"

While Hailey was taking your picture, Jay mouthed thank you to his wife for avoiding a meltdown in the bullpen.

***

3 days later, Sunday

You did not sleep good at all. You tossed and turned all night thinking about your Jay and Y/N date in the morning. You loved them and you loved soccer! But you couldn't go now because what if your glasses fell off when you and Jay were passing the ball and practicing? And, if you took off your glasses before playing, what if he got mad at you? Jay and Will had told you that you had to wear them all the time! And you didn't want Jay Jay to be mad at you!

So, when you went into the kitchen in the morning (wearing your glasses of course) and saw Jay and Hailey sipping their cups of coffee, one could only imagine your relief when you looked out the window and saw the sky was covered with dark gray clouds.

"Morning, kiddo," Jay greeted. "Doesn't look like we can play soccer today." Then, Jay furrowed his eyebrows as he got a better look at you. You had dark circles under your eyes that looked like they should be for a college student cramming for finals instead of a first-grader on a Sunday morning. "You feeling okay?" Then, he walked up to you and placed the back of his hand on your forehead. "Hmm, you don't feel warm."

"Didn't sleep good," you mumbled.

"I didn't sleep good either," Hailey sympathized. "Must be the weather." She knew it was her insomnia acting up, but you had no idea what that was--and she hoped you never would have to know what that was like--, but she didn't feel like explaining it to a first grader this early in the morning while she was running on fumes herself.

"How about we have a lazy day," Jay suggested. "Movies and coloring sound good, Y/N?"

"Yeah. Can Will come, too? He always does the best coloring."

It was true. Because of how steady Will's hands were due to being a surgeon, he could color in all the small areas in the pictures, even in adult coloring books that Hailey had, that you, Jay, and Hailey would typically make a mess out of and at least color outside the lines a bit.

"I'll give him a call. I don't see why he wouldn't want a lazy day," Jay said.

"And, I think we have some chocolate chip cookie dough in the freezer to bake cookies," Hailey suggested.

Jay glared at his wife and then rolled his eyes. You've already gotten spoiled with treats and takeout more than enough this past week and a half. But, he knew as well Hailey knew herself that she had a sweet tooth and it only got worse when her insomnia was acting up.

"Before we do all that," Jay began, "let's get you some breakfast first. What sounds good, kiddo?"

"Can I have an omelet? With lots of cheese please?"

You were recently introduced to these a few months ago when you and Hailey were enjoying chocolate chip waffles at a diner and Jay had an omelet. You wanted some of his hash browns, but he said you had to try a bit of his omelet. You didn't really want to try this, but your want hash browns overpowered this. And, lo and behold, you liked it! So, now on Sundays when Jay wasn't working, you'd ask for an omelette. It has to be Jay who made them though because he made the best ones between him, Will, and Hailey.

"Omelet it is," Jay replied and then picked up a spatula. "How about you go get dressed while I make this, okay?"

"Okay!"

Then, you ran off to your room to put on some comfy clothes to spend the day in.

***

"Where's Y/N?" Will joked when he walked inside around 10:30 that morning.

"I'm right here!" you yelled while you sat at the table coloring. You had no idea how he couldn't see you when you were right there!

"Oh, I didn't recognize you with such pretty glasses."

You dropped your head. "You- You don't?"

Luckily Jay was behind you so that you didn't see him wipe his hand down his face. 

His brother, Jay thought. Thank god he didn't go into pediatrics.

"I was only kidding, silly! Of course, I recognize you! The only thing different about you is that you have glasses now. But, do you recognize me?"

"Yes! But your hair's really messy! Do you want to use my brush?"

Jay choked on his second cup of coffee at your comment and Hailey quickly hit him on the back.

He cleared his throat. "Sorry, went down the wrong pipe," he said and then coughed a couple more times.

Will smoothed down his hair. "Wind's pretty strong out there. Guess it messed it up a bit." Then, he walked over to the table and set a tray of drinks down. "Coffee for all three of us and hot chocolate for you." He handed you your drink. "Careful though. It might still be super hot. Now, what are we coloring?"

***

"She is totally out," Jay commented later that afternoon.

The four of you had started watching a movie and you had curled up next to Hailey under your favorite fuzzy blanket. Needless to say, after you struggled to sleep this past night, within thirty minutes of the movie, you were totally out with your head leaning against Hailey's chest.

Hailey smiled down at you. "She's so cute when she's sleeping."

"When she's awake she's a menace now apparently," Will joked.

"Just because she made one comment about your precious hair," Jay muttered. "Let the hair comment go, man. Let it go."

Will rolled his eyes. "So, how's she doing? She mention any headaches at all with her glasses?"

"Hasn't said anything to me," Jay answered. "She say anything to you, Hails?"

"Nothing," Hailey replied. "She also didn't say that kids were mean to her, so that's good, too."

"Yeah, I remember when Jay got his glasses. All the kids teased him about it," Will said.

"It wasn't all the kids. It was you! Just you! And, now they have more education for bullying and stuff, so maybe kids are nicer than when we were kids." Then, Jay changed the subject. "I'm just shocked she didn't throw a fit when I said we couldn't play soccer today because it was storming."

"But, she said she didn't sleep good last night," Hailey reminded him.

"Yeah, I know. But still, she loves Sundays. And, at the beginning of winter a few months ago, she threw a fit the first time there was too much snow on the ground to go."

"I would say consider it a good thing that she didn't fight with you this morning," Will began, "but you said she didn't sleep good. She say anything else to you? Her tummy or head hurt? I didn't notice anything off when I was here, but maybe she said something earlier."

Jay shook his head. "She seemed fine, other than her being tired."

"Okay, good. If she tells you anything else--especially if she's having headaches--let me know."

***

3 days later, Tuesday

You were usually so excited for Tuesday nights and soccer practice, but now, you were nervous. What if your glasses fell off and somebody broke them? You didn't want Jay or Will or Hailey to be mad at you!

So, when you were running at practice, you went exceptionally slow, which made Jay wonder if you were hurt. He watched you shake your head at your coach, so he must've asked you the same thing.

When you got in the car after practice, needless to say, Jay was slightly worried.

"You okay, kiddo? You didn't look like you were having fun out there."

"I was having fun," you answered, but that was only a half-truth. You only had fun when you were defending and didn't have to worry about running as much, and thus, your glasses falling off.

"Okay. You just didn't feel like it today then?" You shrugged. "That's okay. Everyone has days like that."

What he wasn't going to do was be like your dad and make it seem like you needed to be at 100% every single day. As long as you tried your best with what you had left in the tank, that was all that mattered.

You nodded and just looked out the window while Jay kept driving.

And once you got home, since you put your cleats away nicely without being asked, Jay added a sticker to your sticker chart. But, his detective senses were tingling.

Something was definitely off with you.

***

One week later

It had been a long week for both Hailey and Jay. They'd had their hands full at work trying to catch a serial rapist who ended up killing his last three victims.

During this time, you had spent most of your time with Will, except on Jay's RDO, and then Hailey's RDO when they each spent time with you instead. Even though each of them knew that the team would be a man down on each of their RDOs, they knew it would be difficult for Will to be the sole caretaker of you with his demanding job as well. So, even though they probably should've worked during their RDOs this week, they didn't.

But, they had been so mentally drained on their days off that neither of them remembered to check your backpack for important paperwork. And, both Jay and Hailey knew that Will always conveniently "forgot" to check this. (But, it was probably because he didn't feel like disciplining you if you got a bad report.)

Now, it was 8pm on Tuesday night, they had caught the guy, and both Jay and Hailey had quickly finished their paperwork so that they were home in time for bedtime.

Once Jay and Hailey had finished reading you a chapter of The Chronicles of Narnia, Jay did what he always did when he hadn't been able to see you on a couple of school days straight: he went through your backpack to see if he missed anything such as permission slips, notes from your teacher, and to ensure that Will had been making you do your homework.

When he went through your math folder, stuck between last week's homework assignments and this week's was a note written in cursive. Because it was written that way, he could only assume it was addressed to him or another adult.

Mr. Halstead, I'm writing you this to make sure that Y/N hasn't lost her glasses. I haven't seen her wearing them the past couple of days and wanted to make sure accommodations didn't need to be made. If she has lost them, please let me know and I will be sure to move her desk up to the front to help her see the board for the time being. If you have any questions, please call me at my office number or email me. I previously left a voicemail for you and emailed you, but I don't know if they went through. -Stephanie Harding.

Jay sighed, pulled out a chair at the kitchen table, and began scrolling through his phone. There, from Friday afternoon, was an email from your teacher as well as a phone call from yesterday morning. How could he have missed these?

"You okay?" Hailey asked as she walked into the kitchen, freshly showered. She grabbed two beers from the fridge, popped the cap off both, made her way to the table, and handed one to Jay. "We should be celebrating, not sulking."

"I know, and I'm glad that case is over and the guy's in prison because, you know, he's a monster, but look what I found in Y/N's backpack."

He slid her the note and she began reading.

When she finished, she looked up. "Don't talk to her tonight, Jay. You might dysregulate her so bad that she might go back to sleep because her routine got thrown off."

"I know, but when am I supposed to talk to her? I don't want her throwing a fit in the morning before school, and who knows what's going to come across our desks in terms of cases tomorrow."

Hailey grabbed one of Jay's hands. "Jay, we'll figure it out. And, if we need to wait for your RDO or the weekend when we both hopefully have off, then we'll do that, okay?"

"Okay." He gave his wife's hand a squeeze and then took a sip of his beer.

Thank god for Hailey Upton, he thought.

***

The next day, Wednesday

Once you and Jay got home after he picked you up from school, he made you a snack and you pulled out a chapter book to read to him to practice your reading skills like it was just any other day. He set the addition and subtraction flashcards next to him. You'd do those after you read to him.

But, when you took your first bite of your ants on a log (celery with peanut butter, topped with a few chocolate chips), he reached over and slid the book over to himself. Then, he set it down on the chair next to him so as not to distract you from the upcoming conversation.

"We're not reading?" you asked, furrowing your eyebrows at him.

"Listen, kiddo, we need to talk about why you are not wearing your glasses at school."

"I am!" you protested.

But, Jay saw how your eyes widened slightly when he first said it. He knew you were lying; now he just needed you to admit to it.

"Y/N, your teacher called me and told me that you aren't wearing them. You're not in trouble--"

"No!" you shouted and jumped off your chair. Then, you ran to your room and slammed your door.

Tears pricked your eyes as you threw yourself on your bed.

You couldn't play soccer when you were in high school if you had glasses! At all the games you went to, none of them had glasses! You couldn't give up soccer just to wear these stupid glasses! What did your brothers and your teacher know, anyway? None of them even wore glasses!

You were waiting for Jay to come yell at you for slamming your door, but he never came. And you were so tired from school and from the short conversation that you had with Jay, that you eventually just cried yourself to sleep.

As for Jay, the second he heard your door slam, he sighed and laid his head on the table. What the hell was he supposed to do?

***

You woke up to someone gently shaking your shoulder.

"Y/N, c'mon it's time for dinner, honey."

Hailey.

"No," you mumbled.

You didn't want to face Jay after everything!

"You need to eat, Y/N. You didn't even finish your snack earlier. Just c'mon out and eat dinner with me and Jay."

"Jay gonna be mad at me," you said quietly and rolled over so that you were facing the wall.

"He won't be mad; we just want you to eat something. He made your favorite, fettuccine alfredo, remember?"

That's right! You got to pick dinner once a week and told Jay last week that you wanted fettuccine! And today was Wednesday! It was your dinner day!

"Oh yeah! I forgetted!"

Then, you jumped out of bed and ran downstairs.

Hailey shook her head as she walked behind you. Kids and their moods.

When you got to the kitchen, your plate was set right where it usually was with fettuccine, broccoli, and garlic bread.

You eyed Jay suspiciously when you sat down.

Then, Jay noticed you weren't wearing your glasses. Hailey noticed the very slight tilt of his head, so she quickly jumped in.

"They're on her bedside table," she said. "She was sound asleep when I went up there."

"Mhm," you agreed and then took a bite of your pasta.

Jay figured it was better to let you eat almost all of your food before he started in on the glasses conversation again. He needed you to eat something because, at this point, you hadn't eaten anything except your one ant on a log since 11am at school, which was seven hours ago. He didn't know how you hadn't woken up and been hungry but hey, he knew as well as you did that tantrums made you utterly exhausted.

Once you only had half of your garlic bread left, Jay decided it was time to have another go at this.

"Y/N, me and Hailey were talking, and we thought that if you came home from school wearing glasses, you can get an extra sticker on your chore chart," Jay said. "How's that sound?"

You shrugged. "Okay." You had already been doing that. You'd put them on right when you got in the car. You didn't need them for up close stuff like talking with your friends anyway and you could see Jay, Hailey, and Will just fine without your glasses; they were just a little blurry around the edges.

"That means we need to see you wearing them when we pick you up," Jay continued. "You can't just put them on when you get inside the car." Your brother was nothing if not perceptive.

You could do that. You'd just put them on when you walked out of school for pickup. You couldn't wear them all the time because then what if someone said something about you not wearing them while playing soccer at recess? Then you'd have to wear them at recess and you couldn't play soccer with them on!

"Okay," you said.

"Okay, good," Jay replied.

But, he shot a glance at Hailey. That was way too quick for you to agree to this without a fight even with the added incentive of getting a sticker on your sticker chart.

Something was off and both he and Hailey knew it.

***

Two days later, Friday

Jay walked out of an interrogation, relayed the info to his team, and then sat down at his desk to do some digging into this guy's financials. But, his phone lit up, notifying him that he had a voicemail.

He saw it was from your teacher and his brow furrowed.

"Hi, Mr. Halstead. This is Stephanie Harding calling. I received your email a couple of days ago explaining how you talked with Y/N about wearing her glasses and she said that she'd wear them and that they are not lost. I just wanted to inform you that she hasn't worn her glasses at all throughout the school day, but will put them on for pickup.

I just wanted to inform you of this and please let me know if there's anything that I can do to help."

Jay clenched his jaw and sighed frustratedly after he finished listening. He thought he'd be dealing with this level of sneakiness when you were a teenager, not now!

"Nothing in the financials?" Hailey asked from across from him.

"Still working on that," Jay answered. "Y/N's teacher called. Said she still hasn't been wearing her glasses."

"What? She was wearing them yesterday when I picked her up."

"Her teacher said that she'll put them on at pickup but won't wear them at all during the rest of the day."

Hailey shook her head and rolled her eyes. "We are getting played by a first-grader, Halstead."

"Don't I know it. I'm gonna give Will a call and see if she wore her glasses at pickup. Maybe he can get to the bottom of it while she's at his house tonight."

***

"Alright, kiddo. Game plan today is homework, snack, and reading. Then we'll grab a quick dinner somewhere and go to the girls' soccer game. Sound good?" Will asked when you got inside and set your backpack down.

"Don't wanna do my math homework," you complained. "It's stupid."

"What are you working on?" Will probed. "Maybe I can help you."

"Subtraction. My friends say it's like adding, but the opposite, but it's not!"

"Okay, okay, calm down. I'll make you a snack and then we'll work through it together. How's an apple with peanut butter sound?"

"Do you still have the green apples?"

"I do. Green apple with peanut butter coming right up."

***

Will wasn't stupid. He knew why Jay probably couldn't get the answer from you about not wearing your glasses. And that was because he was asking at the wrong time and because he was the one who disciplined you. Will never had to do that except for taking away ice cream as a bedtime snack a couple of times when you mouthed off to him. You didn't have to worry about having to go to bed early or not being able to watch more tv because you had gotten in trouble with Will. And, you and Jay were very much alike; both of you bottled up your emotions and were stubborn to no end...which is probably why you argued more with Jay than you did Will and Hailey and why Jay couldn't get you to talk about your glasses.

So, Will didn't bring up the glasses at dinner. He didn't even bring them up when you were at the soccer game.

But now was the time for him to bring this up.

You were currently sitting down next to him on the pull-out couch with your teddy bear and your favorite blanket, all ready for a chapter of Narnia and then for bed. You were comfortable and there was nothing to overstimulate you. You had food in your system and the excitement from the day was over.

You were calm.

"Before we start reading, kiddo, I need to ask you a question," Will started.

"Okay, what is it? Is it about what happened in Narnia when me Jay and Hailey readed it last week? Because I can tell you so you're not con...con—" You scrunched up your eyebrows as you tried to remember the word. "So that you know what's happenin'," you said instead.

"It's not about Narnia, but you can tell me before we start reading if you want. But first, I want to know why you aren't wearing your glasses. Do they make your head hurt? Did someone laugh at you?" You shook your head. "Okay, then what is? What's going on, Y/N?"

"Soccer," you mumbled, but it was so quiet that Will couldn't even hear you.

"What was that?" Will asked softly. "It's okay. You can tell me. I won't be mad at you."

You looked up at Will's face. He didn't look mad. Maybe you could tell him. Maybe he wouldn't tell Jay either and then everything would be fine.

"I can't play soccer no more be-because I have glasses!"

At this, you started to cry. All of the nerves you had felt about lying to your brothers and Hailey and the sadness about not being able to play soccer anymore all came tumbling out of you. And, it didn't help that no one on the high school girls' soccer team that you just went and watched earlier wore glasses. That just proved your point!

Will sighed and held back a laugh. Leave it to a little kid to catastrophize from A to Z.

"Who told you that?" Will asked, now realizing that he needed to get to the root of the problem.

"No one did! But none of the big girls wear glasses when they play soccer! And one boy's fell off at school and they got smashed and I'm the only one on my team that has glasses and---"

"Hey, hey, slow down. Take a deep breath, okay?" He allowed you to take a few breaths before he placed a hand on your shoulder. "You can still play soccer."

You looked up at him and your eyebrows furrowed before your mouth fell slightly agape. "I can?

"Yes, silly! We just need to get a strap for the back of your glasses because then they'll stay on when you're running."

"And I can play soccer with Jay Jay on Sunday?!"

"And you can play soccer with Jay on Sunday, yes," Will confirmed.

"Yay!"

"Now what do you say you fill me in on Narnia before I start reading to you, hmm?"

***

"Tell me you got something out of her," was the first thing that Jay said when he answered Will's call later that night.

"Jay, this is our sister we're talking about, not a criminal investigation."

"I know that, smartass. Still...anything?"

"She thought she couldn't play soccer with her glasses."

"What? Where'd she get that idea?"

"Well, kids are very observant, Jay. Maybe more observant than you seeing as you didn't even catch this--"

"Neither did you!"

"Last I checked, my job doesn't involve me doing a stakeout or working undercover."

And then Will launched into a recap of the conversation he had with you.

"Come to think of it," Will began when he was done and had answered all of Jay's questions, "I'm shocked you didn't think to get one for her right away because you didn't get contacts until high school and wore your glasses with a strap when you played soccer all the way from elementary school to middle school. You know what? I think I still have some pictures of that from the family photo album I took from Dad's--"

"Don't you dare!" Jay threatened.

"Who's gonna stop me?"

"Name your price...within reason."

"Breakfast tomorrow, 9am before me and Y/N go pick out her glasses strap. And you're paying."

"Deal!"

And years later, once you got to high school, you never did get contacts because one, you thought you looked better with glasses than without, and two, you wanted all of the little kids that came and watched your games to know that they could play whatever sport they wanted regardless of whether or not they wore glasses.

A/N: Thank you for reading and don't forget to vote and comment! Also, fun fact, I didn't get my glasses until I was 21. I went to renew my driver's license and barely passed the eye exam, so now I wear glasses.

[fixyourwritinghabits]

Any tips on writing for people with ADHD and a short attention span?

Hello! As someone who was recently diagnosed/had to go through the process of jumping through hoops to get meds, I've been trying to put together some new writing routines to get back on track. It has... been a process. Here are some things I've learned (from my personal experience, your mileage may vary):

Writing everyday doesn't work. I think this really common advice has been debunked overall, but let me tell you, there are days when the energy bar starts on empty and stays there. I can function, but the creative juices aren't there. Trying to stay creative by other means, either by reading or working on another hobby, can be a way for you to keep your day productive instead.

Hard schedules don't work. To reflect the above, I can get up at 5am every damn day, but only some of these days will get work done before work. That isn't to say you shouldn't try to make a schedule and stick to it - you'll definitely get more done that way. But it isn't always going to work, and you shouldn't beat yourself up if you can't keep to it every day.

Being 'plugged-in' definitely doesn't work. The 'oh I need to look up how to spell this oh no I'm twelve pages into a Google hole' is definitely still a trap. To keep focused, keep that instant internet away from you. Need to look up something, slap a note on it and come back when you know you don't need to write another 1000 words.

Medication/caffeine/whatever you use to function can only do so much. I can drink a cup of coffee and immediately slam myself into bed. My meds exist to get me through the work day, which is what I need them to do, but won't always be able to keep me through the extra work day. Trying to stay awake and focused when my brain is fucking done for the day just doesn't work. Instead, I have to focus on what does - writing in the morning or at noon, making time when I know I can still function rather than trying to take it on at the end of the day when I know I'll be spent.

What has been working and I've been trying to incorporate more has been:

Drafting on paper. This has always worked for me, and it continues to work for me. Physically writing the words down and editing as I type them does slow down the work, but it makes much more sense to my brain.

Using color codes/other visual tools. Color-coding characters, using different colored pens for types of notes, and flashcards help me flesh out plots. It makes plotting more like an art project, but that in itself can help me be more creative. If you like working on a computer and not by hand, you can spice up Excel sheets and Google docs with different fonts, templates, and adding notes.

Lists, lists, and more lists. I have a planner for work, I have a planner for my personal life, and I have a notepad where I write down all my daily goals, however small. Using a combination of the three has been working great for keeping me on track. For me, physically crossing things out and checking things off is a great motivator.

Alarms and writing sprints. Slap a timer to a screen and write to it. Use an online writing sprint, hop into a work-focused Twitch stream, or use a timed YouTube video to put yourself in a focused environment with a goal in mind.

Relocate. There are certain areas of my apartment that I've dubbed 'The Ooze Zone' where all I can do when I'm there is get nothing done. Unfortunately, because my apartment is quite small, the Ooze Zone takes up most of it. So if you can't set up an office space or a designated area where your brain knows to get work done, consider checking out your local library, a relatively peaceful park, a friend's house, or a cheap coffee shop. I know somewhere who would just drive somewhere and do 80% of his writing in his car. If you can't do your work from home because your brain won't let you, look into alternatives.

If you have meds, take them. Getting medicated and on the right dose is hard, believe me. I've been trying to get back the swing of things after a. being checked out from not being medicated and b. being checked out from not having the right dosage/type of meds. It is a process, but if you have the ability to seek a diagnoses and treatment, it is worth pursuing. If you have meds, take them on a regular schedule and how your doctor recommends. Add an alarm on your phone to remind yourself. Make it part of your routine. Doing it haphazardly is only doing yourself a disfavor.

And lastly, Get More Sleep. The number one thing that may be fucking you over is not sleeping enough. Having ADHD is directly tied with having more sleeping problems in both children and adults. If you have this problem, it is affecting you way more than you know.

Here's the thing - I thought I had a great sleeping schedule for the longest time, and could not figure out why I was so exhausted half the time. But I recently got a fitness tracker, which informed me that actually, my sleeping patterns were complete dogshit. I may have been in bed for eight hours, but I spent three of them tossing and turning.

Make a sleep schedule and stick to it. Go to bed at the same time of night. Consider getting a sleep tracker to see where your sleep patterns are messed up and what you can change to fix it. This sucks, believe me, but going to bed at 9pm to account for that time you'll spent tossing about before you get up at 6am may be the only way to recover those missing sleep hours. Even if it feels like it's taking away from your free time, you will function better overall.

[studentbyday]

week 1. a stuttering start.

i can't believe autumn is already approaching. i feel like i haven't done much to truly live on my own terms this year... (the majority of my time was spent either chained to my desk, living the studying hermit life as usual, or...and this is a new one for this era of my life, feeling like a child following the real adults around on my travels which @zzzzzestforlife documents way better tbh. the travels, that is...)

in addition i've been feeling very unmotivated and numb this school year. even more so than usual. i've never been as zesty as...well, Zesty when it comes to new school years, but it has slowly been getting worse since i started uni and i think i'm getting dangerously close to falling off some cliff i'll later realize was an important cliff to not fall off of. do you get what i mean? i'm only speaking vaguely because i myself do not quite know.

i oscillate between wanting to be extraordinary and extra ordinary. i have fallen back into bad habits, which do not set a good precedent. and overall i feel lost. so so lost that i started reading designing your life. and dulled by the isolation of school i can hardly focus. it's not a new problem, i've just finally been able to put words to it after all these years. engaging and/or cathartic verbal conversation brings me back to life, whether i'm listening or speaking, but i don't get enough of that in my daily life...this is just a very weird mundane state to be in. don't get me wrong, i was relieved to get back to this life with a very predictable pattern after the hectic-ness of travel, but something about it always felt off and i almost can't believe that only now i've realized why.

anyway, feelings pass. and i have overcome the jet lag, so i am that much more energized (and perhaps a little more desperate) to bulldoze through this problem.

Study:

Read/skimmed all the syllabi for anything new (much of it is the same year-to-year as they're all courses in the same faculty and i am resigned to the fact that there will be weighty group work in at least one course out of every year)

Caught up on course announcements

Finished microbiology module for this week (hmmm i read like half of this module last year when i attempted and then dropped this course so it wasn't the most interesting the second time around but i think it'll get better as i get to the new stuff and the nitty-gritty details 🔬 mwahahaha 🦠 i also decided last minute to make flashcards for these and had to transfer my notes to anki. i wish there weren't so many isolated facts or similar but distinct processes i need to remember.)

Made flashcards for half of this week's immunology content (seems to be a memorization-heavy course and i think i really need the active recall since i barely remember the pre-req info 😅 luckily they review it in the module... 🤭)

Reviewed some of the flashcards made this week

Worked on (but didn't finish) global health slides for this week (i'm...not entirely sure what i should be taking notes on or how because...this all seems either very common sense or kind of..."woo-woo" based on my way of understanding the world...but ig that's my own biases talking? i hope they'll just test us on the common sense stuff. that will be easier for my brain 🥴)

Around half of pathology slides are left from this week (probably the most work intensive course i'm taking rn based on the timeline 😵 but also it's shaping up to be my favorite subject this semester because the modules are so well designed AND it's large processes or, even if it's smaller concepts, they're all connected to each other so i don't need flashcards!...i think! i can just pull on the thread of memory and it all unspools (...ideally...)!)

Wrote down due dates for all assessments this semester

Other life things: (yeah idk what to call this section)

I became a 6AM girlie!!! 🥰🥰🥰

Unpacked

Washed my water bottle

Caught up with a friend 💗

Health:

Yoga x2

Journalled x2

Early morning walk in nature x1 (the air smelled so so fresh i was so glad i went out...and even gladder that i went out when i did because after that the air quality got super bad from wildfire smoke 🥺)

Pilates x1 (i made it! in 2 split sessions, but still! and i feel great!!! 😃 i'm so glad i found this channel because she explains the moves in a way that i can get it even with my bad coordination 😅 she also goes slowly and there is no annoying workout music so i can completely focus on the movements and how they feel, it's perfect. 😊)

Music in My Head:

Blue Danube Waltz (OG piano version)

Treat People With Kindness

On the Sunny Side of the Street

Hikaru Nara (the perfect song for my current ambivalent mood because the whole theme of the anime, which is reflected in the sound of this arrangement, is the need to reignite your spark for the things that mean something to you and make the absolute most of it because life is short)

a few dark academia playlists that i put on loop to study to (links under the cut) (somehow the ones with new age music are the only ones i can listen to...light/quiet enough that it doesn't interrupt my thoughts but intense and melodic enough that it puts me in the mood to focus 😅)

[optimizim]

irken flashcards! :)

for my friend's birthday today, i made a set of flashcards for learning the irken alphabet. this uses the AMAZING irken DOOM font by the IMMENSELY TALENTED @invaderlarx and @khaliarart, which is the most canon-adherent font, to my knowledge.

the deck is pretty simple: each card has a front (irken) and back (english), which can be flipped in anki. the pink highlighted english letter shows you whether the irken letter on the flipside is capital or not.

i could definitely see myself doing variations on this; if i've made any mistakes or there's something else you'd like to see done with these, absolutely lmk!

you can download the anki package here. actually can someone let me know if that works lol

have fun studying, irken soldiers! 🫡

[poisonheartfrog]

For any of my fellow English speaking QSMP watchers looking to learn or brush up on their Spanish- I'm no expert, but I've done my time in middle and high school Spanish class, and I have a few website recs:

Word Reference: Spanish-English dictionary. Gives you information about multiple meanings of the word, as well as compound words and idioms. Also has a bunch of other languages (French, Italian, Catalan, German, Dutch, Swedish, Icelandic, Russian, Portuguese, Polish, Romanian, Czech, Greek, Turkish, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, and Arabic)

SpanishDict: Another Spanish-English dictionary. I mainly use it for looking up verb conjugations, since IMO its charts are much easier to read than Word Reference's. It also had some other features that you have to make an account to use.

Conjuguemos: Conjugation practice games (with a frog mascot!). It tries to get you to make an account, but you don't have to- just click "use without account". You can sort by tense, mood, and regularity, and there's both straightforward practice and flashcards and more gimmicky games. Also has vocab and grammar practice, and a few other languages (French, German, Italian, Portuguese, Korean, and Latin)

[ohmyeyesmyeyes]

IT'S NEVER OVER - PROLOGUE (sept. 2005)

summary: if anyone asked sid, he wouldn't say that he liked pittsburgh more after meeting nat. no, that would be absurd.

warnings: short and sweet! (none)

a/n: hi, hello! am i posting this without having finished it? yes. i don't know how long it's going to be but i'm slowly chipping away at it and i'm pretty excited about it. it might even be my favourite series thing i've done so far, and weirdly my first one? i've had the entire thing outlined for months but i've been too busy to even think about posting it, so...here you go! i can't promise posts for this will be regular because the chapters are so long, but i'll try my best to keep you posted! hope you enjoy (a series mastrlist will be out soon too so you can get the gist of where i'm at in the entire process) xo

sneak peak | pinterest board

(It started with music, but Nat didn’t know that.) 

It was a total accident, a random encounter that Sidney couldn’t possibly have predicted – one that, without exaggerating, changed his life to an extent. On a whim, he’d decided to go into that coffee shop he’d walked past everyday for the past three weeks, and it was also on a whim he actually made it to the counter to order an uncharacteristic coffee – he was newly eighteen, being pulled in all sorts of sports-diet directions, the confinement of which kind of irked him, so to him, buying that coffee was a subtle rebellion.

It was also a complete accident that he’d wandered off to the right after taking his coffee from the counter, instead of left, or forwards, or even backwards.

Sidney wasn’t one to believe in fate or destiny: he believed those terms were too magical – they alluded to some other worldly forces coming into play, and he liked to stick to facts. Coincidences. Accidents. Nevertheless, he did find it almost inexplicable, the way that his life hurtled into a completely different route after a mere forty minutes inside a coffee shop that he’d just spontaneously decided to make a trip of. He couldn’t quite get his head around it all.

To him, it was a coincidence that he’d walked past her table. A coincidence that she happened to be blaring the only song he’d been able to listen to for the last four days. He’d barely made it three steps past her before he froze. 

She was wearing those over-the-ear headphones, the ones with orange sponges from the 80s, plugged into the iPod that had come out a few years back. He recognised it because everyone that had one in his high school before he left never shut up about it. Sidney admittedly did own one at the time, but he never really felt the need to show it off  – it was much easier than lugging around a cassette or CD player with songs burnt in.

The song still had him halting in his tracks and turning around, his body much further ahead than his brain because he had to steady his mug of coffee; his sharp actions had the liquid almost sloshing over the edge, but he managed to catch it just in time.

He wouldn’t have done either of those things: stop and turn, if it had been any other song he’d heard. He was just so taken aback by it – the exact, precise song. 

The girl at the table didn’t pay him a single dime of attention when he froze, despite the fact that his hip was practically nudging her table. She wasn’t even looking in his direction, her eyes gazing out of the window on her right, skipping over empty faces as people walked past. It was clear she was supposed to be doing work of some sorts: there were textbooks, novels, and flashcards scattered across the entire table, a pencil case half emptied with pens strewn all over. She had a pen clutched in the fist she was resting her chin on, not caring for the study cards at all – entirely enamoured by the view. 

Sidney followed her eyes. There wasn’t much to look at, just a street, and her chair was directly facing the side of a retail store, clothes and mannequins displayed in the window. 

In hindsight, Sidney didn’t really know what compelled him to do what he did next.

He couldn’t tell if she was bored and just looking out, not paying attention to the music flowing into her ears, or if she was just so absorbed in what she was hearing that she couldn’t physically bring herself to think about her work – that she’d tuned out the outside world entirely.

What caught his attention the most was the crease between her brows. It drew him to look straight at her; an alluring combination of chestnut hair and pale eyes – though not too pale that they made him uneasy. She was also probably the only person in the establishment that was around his age.

She had impeccable music taste, if he did say so himself.

Yet, he couldn’t shake the inkling that this girl was wholly feeling the brilliance and soul-crushing heartache of Jeff Buckley’s genius – and he found himself hoping she was.

That was why he cleared his throat and took a small step to the other side of the table. He threw a quick glance over his shoulder, noting that the cafe was pretty busy, so he knew he could at least try to get away with what he was about to do.

He made sure to tilt his head up, because the hat covering his face would be nothing short of slightly suspicious in a public setting, and it wasn’t until he purposefully knocked into the chair that she flicked her eyes to look at him.

He held his breath, a moment when all they did was look at each other, until the crease in her brows disappeared and she reached to pause her music on her iPod, slowly sliding her earphones off so they rested around her neck. 

“Hi.” 

His assumptions had been correct. She was around his age – her voice was deeper than he’d originally anticipated – and when he found himself slightly closer than before, he was able to make out that she was studying for her SATs. 

It was September.

“Hi.” He replied, forcing a smile that he hoped would convey the apology he felt for intruding on her personal time and in her personal space. Her clutter was all over the table, and he knew that if she was hopefully as kind to strangers as he hoped she’d to be, that it would be somewhat of a hassle to shove some of it away, “I’m really sorry, but there aren’t any other tables free. Would I be able to–”

“Oh, sure.” She interrupted, immediately going to reach to sweep a space clear for him over the other side of the table. Sidney watched with a mildly amused gaze; she didn’t seem to care for the way her flashcards seemed to mix themselves up, or the way her textbooks snapped shut and she lost her page.

She flashed him a welcoming, slightly embarrassed smile as she piled the books on top of each other, and before Sidney knew it, he was sitting in the chair opposite, accidentally knocking their knees together in the process, and sipping from his coffee mug. He fought to maintain the thankful smile on his face, despite the utterly bitter taste of the coffee that seemed to fester on his tongue.

No wonder he’d never tried coffee before, it tasted like dirt.

The girl broke a small chunk of a muffin off, a smile breaking out on her face as she fought a small laugh.

Sidney blushed, “I’m not a big coffee-fan.” He reasoned, shrugging.

“I can tell.” She pressed her lips together momentarily, looking down at the plate before turning her attention back to him. Sidney felt stunned at the colour of her eyes. He’d never seen grey eyes before, but hers seemed to balance more on the green side – only when the sun struck the side of her face, they turned a watery, clear blue. There was also a tinge of brown thrown in there.

What was that called? Heterochromia?

He felt his mouth dry, and before he could stop himself, he was taking another sip of his coffee, this time managing to control the urge to wince, “Thanks for letting me sit here.”

She shrugged, gathering the flashcards and lining them up, “It’s no problem. Sorry for the mess.”

He let his eyes wander over the books once more, the green ‘SATs’ letters jumping out at him, “You got an important date?”

The girl swallowed, not entirely understanding what he meant. That crease formed between her brows again, and she opened her mouth to question him, but Sidney beat her to it, a finger pointing at her stack of books. 

She sighed, “Not entirely, they’re at the end of the school year, but one of my teachers gave us an assignment to get some study material done early.” 

Sidney couldn’t say he understood her stress – it was something displayed across the planes of her face; evident when she looked rather tiredly at the stack of books, and hesitated at the flashcards, before throwing them to the side. She folded her arms across the table, then switched so that her hands were interlocked in front of her.

She looked as though she didn’t quite know what to do with herself, and Sidney couldn’t tell if it was because of the presence of a stranger, or if she was already feeling some sort of academic guilt for throwing her attention away from her studies for a couple of minutes.

He saw her jaw clench, and at that observation, the thought that maybe he was paying a little bit too much attention to her crossed his mind, so he turned his focus to the cup of coffee. He was beginning to feel its effects; his knee was shaking softly under the table and he could feel an influx of energy spark at his fingertips. Or maybe it wasn’t the coffee at all.

He hadn’t thought about hockey for five minutes.

He saw her turn her face towards him out of the corner of his eye, and he looked up, “What about you? Are you in school, or…?” She trailed off, her eyes skimming over the logo that had flashed itself from the safe and unzipped confines of his hoodie. 

He felt his heart quicken at having been caught, worried that perhaps she’d shout out who he was – if she knew – across the entire cafe. He remained optimistic; she didn’t seem the type.

He cleared his throat, “Not anymore.” For some reason he hesitated. He could play off the logo as merchandise – he could be someone other than Sidney Crosby, the New Rookie of the Pens – or he could be honest. When he looked back at her, there was a challenge in her eyes, and Sidney knew then that she already knew who he was. “I just got drafted to the Pens for my first NHL season.”

She sighed, “Can I tell you something?” 

Sidney furrowed his brows, his mouth tilting down in a smile. He was new to the whole ‘local celebrity’ deal, but this by far, is probably one of the least impressed reactions he’d ever had. She clearly knew he wasn’t in school, but had still taken the kind courtesy to ask him the question, despite the futility of it.

He nodded. 

“I only know one Pens player.” Then she pointed to something out of the window, “That banner has been staring at me every week for the past three months.”

Sidney huffed a laugh, thinking she was joking, but followed her finger anyway. He was immediately faced with a street corner, tens of people walking past each other – he could even make out their voices if he concentrated hard enough, and it took a while to figure out what exactly she was pointing at, until his eyes settled on a billboard at least a block down.

He’d been told that for press reasons, the Pens had come up with the idea of a way of promoting him as a player, and a ‘person of Pittsburgh’, by plastering some action shots of him – still staged – around the city. He’d neglected to look up lately, fearing that if he did, he’d be faced with some images of himself, but he hadn’t escaped that entirely.

The billboard was small, and he wasn’t the only player on there, either, but he saw it nonetheless. 

When he spun back around to look at her once more, the only thing that came out of his mouth was, “There’s two other players, not just me.”

She shrugged, “I was talking about Sergei Gonchar.”

Sidney felt the blush colour from his chest to his cheeks as he slowly put his hands over his face, consumed by humiliation. He felt himself smile into his hands when he heard the girl huff a snicker. He’d had quite a few people as of late kissing up to his ego, and apart from his teammates, she was the first one to really deliver a considerable blow – and he was thankful for that; that at least someone still had the ability to look past who he was and tease him like he was a normal person. He was aware of the irony that lay there.

He gathered himself, unabashedly removing his hands and displaying the creeping blush for her to see, and sticking his hand between them, “Sidney Crosby, rookie center for the Pittsburgh Penguins.”

She rolled her eyes, not commenting on the state of his cheeks, her smile fading slightly but still remaining, “I was joking, I know who you are.” She took his hand in hers, gripping it tightly, “Nat Brooks. Student.”

Sidney swallowed, his blush remaining for other reasons, and pulled his hand away, flexing it under the table, “Is Nat short for anything?”

“Natalia.”

“‘S very pretty.” He mumbled, and she smiled sweetly.

“Sidney’s very pretty, too. It suits you.”

Something clenched in his chest.

[cocoatonedcurls]

become an academic weapon 📚🔫✨

hi all !!

with my GCSEs this year, and only a few weeks before back to school, I decided to really lock in yesterday 🫣

so I thought I'd take all the info I've come across while scrolling through studytok and put it into a little post for everyone looking to improve in their studies (& for my benefit as well 🙈)

motivation

this is probably the biggest factor when it comes to locking into your studies, motivation can quite literally make or break your academic achievements (😦)

so, its very important you motivate yourself, and moreover, stay motivated 😭

i've made it sound daunting but motivating yourself is lowkey easier than you think, here's a few ways to do it:

picturing yourself in 10 years, where all your studying and hard work has paid off - you can't be that person without doing the work that they did 😬

you can also do the opposite of the above - imagine how disappointed you'll be if you didn't work as hard as you could have and failed

"revenge studying" - the most toxic yet probably the most widely effective technique - working hard so you can beat than the people who are better than you

make studying aesthetic - create pinterest boards, look at quotes and tiktoks, make success your greatest desire

make it an addiction - if you're bored? study. had a bad day? nothing like setting yourself up for the best future. having a great day? go make it better by making yourself smarter.

get a motivational study app - i LOVE 'Study Bunny' I've been using it for two days now and it genuinely motivates me to be more productive to keep my bunny happy 🙃

resources

obviously, you need some help where you can get it despite all the controversies surrounding studying and the use of the internet, there are some amazing online resources you can use that will actively help you 📚

Quizlet/Anki - both of these flashcard platforms are incredibly useful - Quizlet is a fun platform and you can search for flashcards made by other people - Anki, in my opinion, is better than Quizlet for memorising, and you can import flashcards from Quizlet.

Mindnote - A mindmap making software online, a user-friendly interface + is quick and easy to make them - Great for visual learners

YouTube - the teachers on YouTube are incredibly helpful and can explain any topics you're confused about very quickly and very thoroughly

Spark Notes - great for English literature, with in-depth analysis of your texts and modern translations

Physics & Maths Tutor - free past papers and topic questions for core subjects and a few others, great for active recall

Study Bunny/Flora - helps keep track of your progress and keeps you motivated, I recommend Study Bunny because I can see how much work I've done of each subject and tick off things on my checklist

these are just a few out of many other resources so go do some of your own research, especially if there are websites that help with a specific subject

techniques

different study techniques work best for different people, no technique is a one-size-fits-all, some people are visual learners, others perform best by memorising & etc.

active recall - the only one-size-fits-all method - is a cognitive function that you carry out to remember things in tests, so practising this is a must -> the best way to do this is by completing topic questions and past papers using minimal amounts of notes. basically just testing yourself before the actual test

Spaced-out revision - one of the best ways to make sure things stick in your mind, revise a topic/subject and revisit it every few days, eg. 1, 3, 5, 9, 15, 30; and by the 30-day mark it should be stuck in your mind because your brain believes its something that you need to know in the long run and stores it in your long term memory

Flashcards - great to memorise content for the test, especially subjects that are tested with orals

Scribble method - scribbling on a piece of paper while revising the content in any form, reading, listening, etc. helps your brain store the information you're consuming more effectively

Feynman method - basically just explaining the topic you're revising to someone, this helps you develop your understanding and catches out any areas you're unsure about to revise later

making mindmaps - this is great for visual learners, especially if you use different colours for each section of the map so that you can associate each concept with each colour and recall them easily

again, those are just a few that come to mind. do your own research and find out what works best for you 😇

while studying

knowing how to study effectively is also a crucial aspect of success (obviously) 🤭

here are a few tips:

don't listen to music with lyrics, instead you can listen to lofi tracks, cafe/library asmr, brown noise, jazz music (my favourite)

set yourself a study slot, like 2 hours every day at a specific time & set a focus filter on your phone for the duration of your study time

make an aesthetic/cute study space so you can enjoy your time in that space and it doesn't feel like a chore

get a whiteboard to make learning more interactive & fun

light a specific candle whenever you're studying so your brain knows to associate the scent with working

have regular breaks eg. every half hour for 5-10 mins

reward yourself afterwards, so you associate studying with a good experience

consistency is key, the more you study the easier & more fun it becomes 🙃 the more you study the more you are likely to succeed and fulfil your dreams ✨

remember though, academics is not everyone's thing:

"you cannot judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree"

everyone is good at something, and it doesn't make anyone lesser or greater 🫶

if you try your best, that is all that matters 🫠

- li 🌘

[booksbluegurl]

Study Tip #1

How to remember stuff for a long period of time?

Firstly, you should know that our brain is very adept at forgetting things it doesn't consider necessary for its survival and it fails to understand that excelling our exams are veryyyy important for our survival.

So, what you need is revision of your subject matter over and over again, over a period of time.

How to achieve that though?

Flashcards are often used for achieving this technique but to be honest, for a very vast syllabus Flashcards get quite overwhelming. So I created REVISION SHEETS for myself. It's the same thing as flashcards but it encompasses a few other techniques that makes the vastness of the topics a little easy to control and comprehend.

I make them two ways: one is completely random, with information important to remember but from various different topics. And another is by making mindmaps.

And in both of these things, I add information in QnA format. Easy.

Step by Step guide to revision sheets:

Firstly, I'd advise you to read/understand a chapter/topic through a lecture, a youtube video or a textbook. Atleast have a basic understanding of the concepts.

Check the major headings or the major sub-topics.

Start plotting the mindmap roughly, by Sub-topics and how and where you'll put them for better understanding.

Now, when you're writing content, put it all in QnA format, especially HOW you want you remember the information.

There, done.

Just make sure to use that sheet to revision at good intervals of time.

You can, of course, make changes to this process. But this is what I've done for my revision work.

[Also, I am not sure if someone else might not have already thought of this idea. Though, I don't think such study tips have any copyright but I'm just putting out there that if it resembles something that others have used/talk about online, then it's because we both thought of the same thing. And you'll too probably to solve your study problems. So all the best, let's all work hard and find our happiness.]

-Tanishka

Pictures from pinterest. Credit to the owners.

[rigelmejo]

On a lighter note. If you're a language learner browsing forums and sites, some fairly chill ones to check out:

Chinese-Forums.com: there are a lot of good study suggestions on here, and people who have shared their progress and stuff they did to study X skills. Even if you are not studying Chinese, a lot of their discussions can apply to learning other languages. And if you've ever been on some japanese learner forums where people tended to attack more over "study MY way, not X way," this forum has much less of that. So I've found the ideas shared on here have also been useful for applying to how I study other languages. Some great tips on reading here.

forum.language-learners.org: this site may be easier to find posts for, if you go to a web search site (google, duckduckgo, searx.space) and search this site's name as well as the question you have. So for example "language-learners.org how to improve reading skill" or "language-learners.org listening reading method." This forum has posts by many language learners, who share experiences with study methods, progress they've made, language challenges and study methods and how they went progress wise. It's very useful for looking up study methods and how they've worked/not worked for people, and seeing people's progress they share. The forum seems a bit less ready to attack others compared to some subreddits on reddit.

reddit.com/r/dreamingspanish: Dreaming Spanish is a youtube channel and website that teaches Spanish through pure comprehensible input designed lessons (and the creator designed the lessons for Automatic Language Growth, but people use DS in a variety ways including as practice to supplement explicit study so the community is somewhat open to people studying DS in ways besides purely comprehensible-input). The subreddit is more focused on pure ALG method, so no looking words up and no trying to translate in your head and no explicit vocabulary and grammar study, because that's how DS instructs students to study using it. But their study suggestions still work very well with other study methods, so if you are a learner doing a lot of explicit study like anki flashcards and textbooks, the Spanish resources suggested on DS subreddit are still useful for practicing listening to Spanish or reading Spanish. It's also cool to see people share their progress doing an ALG method, and a lot of people on DS subreddit share how they're doing, what they've done so far, progress during different stages. I did a lot of digging a while back, to try and see if any learners who did the ALG method shared WHEN they spoke, and how they improved their speaking over time. And also, when they found content made for native speakers understandable. DS subreddit has a lot of learners sharing that stuff - when they started speaking, how they're practicing it, how it's improved over time, when they could understand X content and how well they could understand it and how it's improving.

Heavenly Path Notion Site: excellent resource for finding recommendations of content to read/listen to in Chinese. I think their ranking of difficulty on their website is incredibly useful, and matches well to my own experiences. Their recommendations for how to start learning to read Chinese are also super solid, from mentioning Pleco and graded reader options to suggesting when to transition to materials for native speakers around (1000-2000 words learned/HSK 4) and which materials to start with (their Newcomer recommendations are way easier than the novels I started trying to read with). MoonIvy has posted recommendations on Heavenly Path, and shared their progress on reddit and other forums as well, and their journey and progress learning is something I'm hoping to follow along after lol. They're a great example of progress through reading Chinese. There's other people involved in Heavenly Path who also made amazing progress, someone shared they read SaYe within a few months of starting to learn Chinese, then increased novel difficulty from there! If you are learning to Chinese and wish to eventually read webnovels, I highly encourage you to check out this site and start working on reading as soon as possible. Their guide on reading has a place to start for anyone (beginner graded reader suggestions even if you only know 300 words like Mandarin Companion, and up), and if you follow that guide I do think it's entirely reasonable you will be reading a novel for kids by the end of the year (like TuTu DaWang) and a webnovel by an author you love in 2 years (or sooner, if you read a lot or aren't an absolute beginner... after all, I read some of a Priest novel within 1 year, and some people who referenced Heavenly Path's recommendations read bl webnovels Within the first year of studying). Reading that novel you love in Chinese is not an unobtainable goal, it's something you can do in 1-2 years. Please check out Heavenly Path's recommendations for a path to achieving that, with reading material that may not feel as hard as if you randomly selected novels.

[utilitycaster]

Speaking of Laura and Marisha having relatively weak chemistry, which CR cast members do you think have the strongest chemistry (romantic or otherwise) across campaigns?

I've tried to limit this because I could literally name a great relationship for basically every cast pairing at this point, but some of my favorites. To keep things balanced, I've done a sort of circle situation with two pairings per cast member. I also haven't included Matt just because I think it would be weird because as DM he has to play off everyone well, and he does.

Travis and Liam always have something bizarrely intense and it's different every single time and it's never quite romantic (other than Bertrand/Lieve'tel) but it is, frequently, homoerotic. Obviously most present for Fjord and Caleb and particularly their conversation in the Xhorhaus, but the "I want to give you an experience" line in late Campaign VM and Chetney and Orym's conversation in the Heartmoor are two examples.

Ashley and Travis are also always good; Pike and Grog are legendary for a reason, Fearne and Chetney have some extremely fun stuff going on but can also take it to more serious places, notably their discussion after Ashton's shard absorption attempt. and Fjord and Yasha didn't interact a ton but their few moments (I'm specifically thinking their shopping trip around episode 108 or 109?) are stellar.

Sam and Ashley have the same quality I think Liam and Travis have, namely, they are on some level playing chicken with each other and neither will back down. We see this with Pikelan; my favorite interaction is Pike being mad at Scanlan after he returns from his Meat Man era. Pike and Tary and the flashcards to remember VM is also a legendary scene for a reason. Veth and Yasha have some unbelievably funny conversations (I killed my whole family, I'll throw you under a bridge) and FCG and Fearne have run the gamut from poignant (post-Otohan Fight) to ridiculous (Fearne riding FCG around and using them as a thermos; honestly, the latest Otohan encounter somehow straddled these two vibes).

Laura and Sam should be a legendary cast pairing. They tend to play in a similar space thematically and they also keep overlapping in some sort of stat or outlook as well, without ever playing characters who knew each other beforehand. It's uncanny. We had Vex and Scanlan as Vox Machina's Charm (highlight being Vex's reaction during Bard's Lament). Vex and Tary becoming best friends and opening a bakery. Jester and Veth's shenanigans and deep friendship (messing around in that temple in Zadash; Jester confiding in her about Fjord kissing her; that one time where they encountered the syphilis bandits and kept running past each other in the dark; Jester taking the flask; and many more). And FCG and Imogen's early campaign closeness, with Imogen insisting on FCG's personhood and the two of them doing mind and dream stuff together.

Taliesin and Laura, unsurprisingly given the appeal of Perc'ahlia, are always great as well. Their willingness as Percy and Vex to be incredibly honest with each other, even about their darker traits, is commendable. Molly and Jester were fascinating because I don't think he respected her much but he did enjoy her company, and she admired him greatly. Team Cleric was also, naturally, a great duo, and I particularly think of them both returning to their respective thematic wells of closed-offness and recognizing it in each other, but going to other places to open up. We didn't get a ton of Kingsley, but he and Jester seem to get along pretty well! And Imogen and Ashton's standout moment was post-shard, but they also had a really good conversation after All-Minds-Burn, and I think they are able to embrace the tension regarding their different idealizations of estranged parents as seen in the latest episode.

Marisha and Taliesin are also really unafraid to explore conflict with each other, and it enhances their character interactions. Percy and Keyleth's friendship is fascinating because it seems that pre-stream they were quite close, but once the Briarwoods arc hit they often found themselves at odds and played off each other brilliantly. I love Molly and Beau's belligerence as well; that is one of my personal big regrets about Molly's death, and Marisha did a fantastic job showing how Beau was affected. Beau and Caduceus were also really interesting, in that they saw each other as the adults of the team for a while, especially early on. Beau and Kingsley have a great conversation in the Nein Reunited. And I've been pretty open about finding Laudna and Ashton's chemistry fascinating; while I enjoyed it romantically earlier, and would have loved to see how that played out, there's just such a great weird tension now, post-shard, that's hard to pin down.

Liam and Marisha have two of I think the most popular relationships in C1 and C2 and with good reason. Vax and Keyleth complement each other incredibly well, and I find Keyleth's feelings about the Raven Queen and how she and Vax approach them very differently to be beautifully done. Empire Siblings are again a favorite - they're so often at odds early on even as Beau has a lot of empathy for Caleb, and they're both the nerds of the party and among the most politically-minded to the point of working closely together years after the campaign. Laudna and Orym are also fascinating because they have these similar and yet wildly different ties to Vox Machina, and Orym feels for her situation, and they have some great conversations during the Issylra arc, but I actually love the growing tension. I love Orym flat out telling Laudna that this mission is important and he is pressuring Imogen because only she is capable of getting this information. I'm excited for the infiltration that's coming up!

But also because I can't limit myself here's some thoughts generally about cases where it's not every campaign but it's worth watching. The short version is "Travis and Ashley have some kind of chemistry with everyone."

I can name at least one relationship, romantic or platonic, between one of Travis's characters and a character from every other cast member, but I specifically want to shout out him and Marisha, who have zero romantic chemistry and bananas platonic chemistry in not just all three campaigns but also EXU Calamity and Candela Obscura Chapter 2. (He and Taliesin tend to have a fun and different thing going on each campaign and have a lot of similarities as players; Scanlan and Grog's clown to clown communication and Fjord and Veth's weirdly charged hostility are great; and hilariously I am obviously a massive fan of Fjord and Jester but I feel like the Baileyhams each campaign are like either we're doing high romance or we're going extremely our separate ways, which kind of makes sense in that they have extremely different approaches to D&D but also a lot of overlap in themes. Like on the rare occasions Grog and Vex, or Chetney and Imogen talk it's very good but they're certainly not the closest of characters)

Ashley also plays well with everyone. She has phenomenal chemistry with both Marisha and Laura. Beauyasha is readily apparent but also what we saw of Pike with both Keyleth and Vex was fantastic, and Imogen and Fearne are great and have some sparks, and Yasha and Jester had some incredible conversations. I also enjoy Ashley and Liam but have never shipped their characters romantically (and I suppose that was only even feasible in C1 given character sexualities); that's on my list of "could be fun" because they do always play off each other well. I will say, Ashton and Fearne have grown on me as a pairing but Ashley and Taliesin have always like...quietly vibed and had some great moments, and I think Molly and Yasha was (platonically) promising and cut short, and I love the conversation where Caduceus encourages Yasha to tell Beau how she feels, but they've never quite blown me away. I would like to see it though. There's potential.

Marisha and Sam seem to operate in very different spaces and so like...Keyleth and Scanlan, or Laudna and FCG, don't really interact much though they do have some mechanical overlap (Keyleth and Scanlan were good in combat together but didn't talk a ton) but specifically as Beau and Veth they were incredible. This is out of game but I very much enjoy their rapport during the Midst roundtables. Would love to see more.

Liam and Sam are also a fascinating case in that they're obviously very close friends irl but it's only as Veth and Caleb, and as the Grimms in Candela Obscura, that they've played characters who were close. They do have great chemistry though, romantic and platonic, and I'd love to see it explored. Liam and Laura are also interesting in that I love the twins and think they're amazing, and I like Orym and Imogen's relationship but particularly with C2 in the rearview, I just do not see much romantic chemistry between them at all. Bonkers good platonic chemistry though.

Taliesin and Sam are also a fun one in that I do like FCG and Ashton's friendship and their post-shard absorption conversation was a standout, as is Percy's outburst at Scanlan during the Bard's Lament and his friendship with Tary (and Tary's crush on him). Veth and Molly had some good moments; Veth and Caduceus did NOT know how to interact with each other.