#I'm tired and stressed myself lmao

[kettlefire]

Muscle Memory (DpxDc)

Jason barely remembered getting back to his safe house or even finding his way to bed. The night had been so tiring, so busy, and so many parts of his body hurt.

The moment his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light. Drifting off into dreamland for some much need sleep.

That was until a noise stirred him up from his sleep. It was a soft creak of one of his many loose floorboards.

It was in a flash that Jason was up, eyes still heavy with sleep, and a gun held to his thigh as he exited his bedroom. The soft light coming from his bathroom was the first hint.

When he pushed open the bathroom door, the sight before him had him holstering his weapon. Black hair, blue eyes, and blood. That's all Jason needed to see.

Jason would swear he wasn't still half asleep, that he knew this wasn't one of his brothers. In reality, still sluggish from a hard night and sleep deprivation, Jasin's brain had automatically assumed it was one of his baby brothers.

As he immediately settled into patching up the wounds, holding back questions for now. It wouldn't be the first time one of them came to him for aid when they didn't want Bruce to know they were hurt yet.

It was pure muscle memory as Jason worked. Yes, he didn't like the injuries, reminding himself to ask which rogue did this in the morning.

Now wasn't the time for an interrogation. Not with the barely concealed tears in those eyes, or the dark bags that decorated beneath them.

He barely grumbled for the teen to take the couch, reminding that there were extra blankets in the hallway closet. Dropping a few pills into the boy's hand to help with the pain he was surely in.

Jason left the mess in the bathroom, leaving it a problem for more awake him. He waved the boy off when he tried to speak, telling him they'll talk in the morning.

In the end, Jason was glad to finally face plant back into his bed. Barely bothering to curl up under the covers before sleep took over once again.

When morning came, Jason almost forgot about letting one of his brother's crash in his place. Stumbling out of his bedroom to immediately notice the lump on his couch.

He put a pot of coffee on, grabbing his phone, ready to let Bruce know that whoever came to him last night was safe and sound.

Except, when Jason moved over to confirm who it was, he finally noticed. This wasn't one of his brothers. And last he heard, Bruce hadn't taken in any new strays.

Jason stood over the sleeping boy, phone in one hand, and mind figuring out what to do. His mind replaying the half-asleep memories from last night.

It made sense, now that he thought about it. The boy had seemed so scared, so surprised that Jason was helping. The boy hadn't done anything either by the looks of it.

He didn't seem to have taken anything or even snooped. The boy seemed to have just crashed on the couch like Jason had told him to. He didn't come here to rob him or cause trouble. The kid had broken into his safe house only to raid his first aid kit.

The kid had broken into his safe house only to raid his first aid kit.

Well, Jason wasn't about to put Alfred's teachings to shame by being a horrible host either.

[immortalsins]

not to keep muaythaiblogging but im so proud of myself i could cry

[seventh-district]

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[firendgold]

Since I saw that you're doing the violence ask game can you answer 22, 25 and 7??

I sure can.~

This one got long af though, so another readmore.

(still choosing violence)

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

This is another one I've answered already, but tbf... it was yesterday. So I can pull my second favorite part of canon instead so you don't have to re-read an older answer.

There's two moments that tie: one in year 5 and one in year 6. Year 5's moment is a nice warm-and-fuzzy "the trio are such good friends" scene, in the midst of Umbridge torturing Harry with her quill:

It was nearly midnight when Harry left Umbridge’s office that night, his hand now bleeding so severely that it was staining the scarf he had wrapped around it. He expected the common room to be empty when he returned, but Ron and Hermione had sat up waiting for him. He was pleased to see them, especially as Hermione was disposed to be sympathetic rather than critical. “Here,” she said anxiously, pushing a small bowl of yellow liquid toward him, “soak your hand in that, it’s a solution of strained and pickled murtlap tentacles, it should help.” Harry placed his bleeding, aching hand into the bowl and experienced a wonderful feeling of relief. Crookshanks curled around his legs, purring loudly, and then leapt into his lap and settled down. “Thanks,” he said gratefully, scratching behind Crookshanks’s ears with his left hand. “I still reckon you should complain about this,” said Ron in a low voice. “No,” said Harry flatly. “McGonagall would go nuts if she knew—” “Yeah, she probably would,” said Harry. “And how long d’you reckon it’d take Umbridge to pass another Decree saying anyone who complains about the High Inquisitor gets sacked immediately?” Ron opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out and after a moment he closed it again in a defeated sort of way. “She’s an awful woman,” said Hermione in a small voice. “Awful. You know, I was just saying to Ron when you came in . . . we’ve got to do something about her.” “I suggested poison,” said Ron grimly.

Just seeing the trio bounce off each other is soothing (especially after reading days or weeks worth of fanfics where they all suddenly hate each other or were never really that good of friends or whatever). Harry's gratitude and stubbornness, Hermione's caretaking and forethought and plotting, Ron's voice of reason and necessary dash of humor... all perfect. Also, just... Harry is so used to going things alone, toughing things out by himself. It's heartwarming and sad that he still doesn't expect Ron and Hermione to do something as simple as waiting up for him to get back from hellish detention. Also also: Crookshanks curling up with him. ^^

Year 6's moment is just between Harry and Hermione:

Hermione stopped dead; Harry had heard it too. Somebody had moved close behind them among the dark bookshelves. They waited and a moment later the vulture-like countenance of Madam Pince appeared round the corner, her sunken cheeks, her skin like parchment and her long hooked nose illuminated unflatteringly by the lamp she was carrying. ‘The library is now closed,’ she said. ‘Mind you return anything you have borrowed to the correct – what have you been doing to that book, you depraved boy?’ ‘It isn’t the library’s, it’s mine!’ said Harry hastily, snatching his copy of Advanced Potion-Making off the table as she lunged at it with a clawlike hand. ‘Despoiled!’ she hissed. ‘Desecrated! Befouled!’ ‘It’s just a book that’s been written in!’ said Harry, tugging it out of her grip. She looked as though she might have a seizure; Hermione, who had hastily packed her things, grabbed Harry by the arm and frogmarched him away. ‘She’ll ban you from the library if you’re not careful. Why did you have to bring that stupid book?’ ‘It’s not my fault she’s barking mad, Hermione. Or d’you think she overheard you being rude about Filch? I’ve always thought there might be something going on between them …’ ‘Oh, ha, ha …’ Enjoying the fact that they could speak normally again, they made their way along the deserted, lamplit corridors back to the common room, arguing about whether or not Filch and Madam Pince were secretly in love with each other.

Very, very cute scene showing Harry and Hermione getting along casually, something we're not often treated to even in canon. A frankly disturbing amount of fans (particularly fans of A Specific Ship I Will Not Mention Here) have bought into the propaganda that Harry and Hermione aren't really that good of friends just because during GOF, when he'd just experienced his first ever schism with a close friend, Harry privately confessed to missing Ron and enjoying the things he did with his male best friend more. The trio is not "Harry and Ron, then Ron and Hermione". It's "Harry, Ron, and Hermione"; all three of them are necessary pieces of the whole. Harry and Hermione's friendship is different than Harry's with Ron, but it's no less valuable, and not any weaker, or else Hermione wouldn't have stayed in that damned tent.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

Every bit of discourse about Sirius not getting a trial. We know. The injustice is the point. The cruelty is the point. The POINT is to show that wizarding Britain is glitz and glamor and not all that fair to its marginalized peoples and underclass, you nimrods. Frankly, the fanfics that purport to 'fix' it by giving Sirius his "restored Lordship" or a bunch of seats on the Wizengamot or immediate "wizarding guardianship" over Harry or some unnamed hot babes for him to fuck on or off-screen are very... shallow and unsatisfying. Either that or they give him a bunch of money, though this would at least be on brand for the Ministry. But like... yeah. I'm tired of this complaint always going in the same direction and not being a gateway to Greater Commentary On The Series and the World. Because it's not like Sirius and/or Harry become the type of people who rebel against this ideology. If anything, they embrace the pureblood nonsense in a lot of these fics and are just mad that Sirius was the target that one time. Gaaaah.

And, and. Every bit of discourse about Dumbledore leaving Harry at the Dursleys and/or the sacrificial lamb throwaway line by Snape, especially because 99.9% of people discussing it either haven't read the books, haven't read them since the first time and desperately need a re-read, have only seen the movies, are parroting opinions from some other wrong person on the internet, are all read-up but blatantly ignoring what Dumbledore and Harry say (and don't say) over what they THINK they mean, or some other lovely form of ignorance that leads to the same long-debunked takes being re-introduced as GASP-DID-YOU-EVER-CONSIDER soundbites over and over and over and OVER again. I'm so sick of it.

I get it, JKR's a TERF, you don't want to re-engage with her work, and you don't have to. You don't have to give her any more money. Hell, you shouldn't, ever again. But please, fucking make sure your knowledge is correct and not fandom telephone when it comes to Harry's childhood and Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. I'm not-even-lowkey sick of some of y'all at this point.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because of how the fandom acts about them?

I... don't have an immediate answer for this, so I'm going to have to think about it. To you it's only going to take me one line, but for me it'll actually be like... an evening or something.

...

Okay.

This is difficult because (to use the exact terminology) I can't think of a character I've come to hate because of how the fandom acts about them. I definitely have characters whose most popular fanon versions are so irritating or repulsive that it has caused me to look more critically on the real versions of them, though. I guess maybe I'll list those here.

Fleur came to mind first. She seems (and can be) very shallow and haughty in canon at first, but shows compassion and hidden depths in all three of her appearances. She has some veela hair in her wand from her grandmother, and a deep devotion for her younger sister. However... many fanfics (especially harem fanfics or flowerpot fanfics) paint her as either this femme fatale who uses her "veela allure" at will and Cannot Fathom the idea of a man who can resist her (and is thus more vulnerable to falling in love with such a man) or as a super-powerful witch whose family is basically running Magical France (since of course, she is the only French character we know, so why wouldn't she be the most influential person there? /s). Basically, the "foreign" version of what people do to fanon Daphne Greengrass. Ironically, the best fanfic portrayals of Fleur I've seen are the ones that keep her shipped with Bill (with a few flowerpot exceptions, see A Beautiful Lie by MaybeMayba as the prime example), or ship her with Hermione or Ginny... which is sad because I love me some ship variety. (And I still think Bill/Tonks would've been rad as hell.) So I don't dislike canon Fleur, but fanon's "over-attention" to that possible veela heritage and the weird implication that Harry was just "forced" not to notice this perfect woman in his life, rather than just noticing her beauty and not being interested, rubs me the wrong way and disinclines me from including her in many of my own works.

The Bones family is next. Yes, both Amelia and Susan. Susan isn't as bad (I think she has... two lines in Order of the Phoenix? maybe?), but as with most "mostly undefined" HP girls, the personality the fandom has given her (the super sweet politically-savvy Hufflepuff girlfriend of "just do independent!Harry with Lordships and pro-Ministry propaganda and plenty of Wizengamot meetings between Hogwarts classes") is one I've seen so many times it has come to negatively affect my view of the real girl, even though I think the way she calls Amelia "auntie" in canon is adorable. As for Amelia, fanon likes to make her either the Only Sane Man in the Ministry or the leader of the sane faction, who magically is able to fix or ignore all the corruption in said Ministry and can railroad through whatever decisions Harry needs done once he needs to Do Political or Pureblood Stuff Outside of Hogwarts--provided, of course, he's been nice enough to Susan recently.

The closest actual answer to this question I have is Tom Riddle. I didn't like him in canon by any means--I'd probably say I was neutral toward him, just seeing him as "the young Voldemort before he did his magical girl transformation". But fanon kind of acts like he and Voldemort are... two different people? There's these pervasive ideas that either Tom could've been "saved" if Certain People Just Did More (to stop him sneaking around and bullying and murdering???), or that Tom wasn't really so bad when he was gathering up supporters, murdering his family members and the few people who trusted him, and generally going around Becoming the Dark Lord--it was just when he made the switch that he became bad. And like... no. I can't buy that. Even in fanfic, I can't get fully behind the idea of a sane Tom Riddle who was Doing Good until he got sidetracked Oh Nooo. He wasn't. I believe Voldemort was saner before he tried to kill a baby and it backfired, but I don't think there was ever a point where he could have been saved. At every fork he made the wrong decision--to soothe his ego, to feel powerful, to feel special, to feel better than others and make them feel that way too. Tom Riddle's a prick. If anything, we should've seen him squirm a little more before he died.

The last one stings, because it's a character I adore: Hermione. Hermione is a very polarizing figure in canon and always has been, I get it. But what particularly hurts me about her fanon portrayals is that they are VERY SELDOM accurate, or even balanced. Either the author sees her as Their Wife and so she is perfect and never does any wrong and basically becomes the main character of the fic (even if she is not actually the main character), or they overinflate her flaws and use it as a reason to hate on her and bash her to oblivion. There's rarely an in-between. I'm not sure which one is worse. If you held my feet to the fire, I might say the former because a character without any flaws or one who takes over the entire narrative and doesn't let other characters breathe is not fucking interesting to me in the slightest.

This especially hurts because I am a huge Harmony fan and like 60% of bad Harmony fanfics are always the same fucking tropes/plotlines. Hermione is unironically referred to as The Brightest Witch of THE Age (incorrect, not what Remus said. he said "the brightest witch of your age I've ever met", basically meaning she's unusually smart for a fourteen year-old girl). She's treated like the next female Dumbledore who has all the answers (even about stuff she wouldn't know) and often guides Harry's every move.

And speaking of Dumbledore--the same girl who is supportive of him in canon and (after Harry) is MOST likely to recognize Dumbledore as a human who can make mistakes is ALWAYS turned into a Dumbledore Skeptic Who Has Been Suspicious of His Motives All Along, and who will do whatever it takes to get her boyfriend away from his manipulations... by taking manipulative!Dumbledore's place. That's right. This version of fanon Hermione ALWAYS becomes the same thing the author is supposedly railing against, because Harry becomes her mouthpiece, spends all his time with her to the exclusion of anyone else, and can't have a single meeting or meaningful scene with any other character unless she is also present.

Haphne fics do this too, but I swear they got it from bad Harmony fics and it makes me so mad. For once, I would love to read a Harmony fic where Dumbledore is portrayed accurately and both Harry AND Hermione are equal, independent partners who don't have panic attacks if separated for more than five minutes. Especially because as a child Hermione never struck me as the kind of person who even would get married or have a serious relationship distracting her from her Great Work!

But yeah. That last one hurts the most because I love Hermione as an individual, as the very important third of the trio, as a potential partner for Harry (though this isn't the right blog for that!), and just as an iconic character.

I... think that's all? Yep. Thanks~!

[larryslutlinson]

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[konkuuritobye]

eventually maybe i'll feel like being on tumblr again but right now i'm having way more fun with discord/wire rp lmao

[fatliberation]

Sorry for leaving this in your inbox, but I need to vent and ask for advice in a place where people won't mock me. What do you do when sex is super difficult because of your fat? I've recently gotten into my first relationship and. I thought I had a handle on my internalized fatphobia and self hate but this has made it worse than ever. We can't have satisfying penetrative sex (we've tried all the tips and workarounds. Nothing works. I'm larger than most of the FA community.), and recieving oral sex is also difficult for me. I also get tired and sweaty extremely quickly if I have to like hold up myself on mostly my arms or something, so he has to do most of the work. So sex is just. Mostly the one that works on repeat, and we don't have it very often because it isn't that fun for either of us, and it also makes me cry afterwards sometimes because of how disappointing it is & me beating myself up over it.

I'm genuinely worried my boyfriend is going to leave me for this. He's clearly very frustrated with the situation, even though he tries to be nice about it most of the time. Earlier today I tried to like be flirty and hint at stuff and he just. got a bit sad. and then said that clearly neither of us enjoy the sex we're having and that he has a lot of trouble staying hard.and that he doesn't see the point when we're both forcing it for no reason. I think he's going to break up with me soon. His ex is way lighter than me, so he's probably comparing the normal sex he had with her with whatever the fuck this abnormal shitshow is :/

All the work I've done on myself to be happy with being fat (including working up the courage to date, what a mistake that was lmao) is all gone. This has ruined my self-esteem so much. I feel like one of those fatphobic jokes but a person.

first and foremost, please try your best to remember this: your body is not the problem. one more time. your body is not the problem. I'm so very sorry you're concerned that your boyfriend would leave you over this. it sounds like he has a lot of preconceived ideas about how sex is supposed to go. I promise you that it doesn't have to be this way. if this is something that could really end the relationship, know that this person is not compatible or open to exploring your needs, rather than your needs being "too difficult." I promise it's him, not you. I know folks who are 600+ pounds who have excellent sex lives and partners who satisfy them and enjoy satisfying them. when someone starts treating your pleasure like a chore, that's just shitty. I know how much it hurts. it also does damage to your own openness to pleasure. when you're caught up in feeling like sex/your body is something that needs to be "fixed," nothing is going to feel sexy, because all that pressure puts stress on and takes you out of the mental state where you're able to experience pleasure. does that make sense? so many couples get stuck in this cycle.

there are so many ways to engage in pleasure without penetration or orgasm. there's a lot that goes into foreplay, setting a mood, making your partner feel appreciated and attractive. words and touch play a huge part in this. something as simple as exploring each other's bodies, not with the intention of reaching climax, but simply to be vulnerable and engage each others' senses. have your partner give you a massage. play with your hair. tickle your back with a feather. shower together. kiss you. compliment you. if either of you are into any kinks or dirty talk, that could be a great way to engage each other sexually without the pressure of "achieving" a goal. the goal here is just to feel good, close, and connected. societal messaging about sex has placed so much importance on orgasm instead of pleasure - when taking the time and space to relax and receive attention, is key.

feel free to check out my other posts on fat sex ed, there's lots of assistive toys that can make pleasure more accessible, but I think that should be a tool for later, since the biggest issue here is the pressure to perform. know that pleasurable sex can exist for you! but for now, I would recommend taking a break from sex altogether since it is not pleasurable for you right now. because pleasure is the whole point. forcing it is only going to feel worse. you do not owe it to your boyfriend, especially if it doesn't feel good and is taking an emotional toll. I hope you both are able to take a step back, reassess and communicate, and are able to reconnect and create a safe space to explore.

I understand why you're beating yourself up over this, I've been there too. but also know that it's just another societal standard that's been internalized (and it doesn't sound like your boyfriend is helping). like you said, you've done a lot to unlearn fatphobia. there's a lot of internalized beliefs we absorb from society surrounding sex, just like body image. I promise that there is nothing wrong with you. If your boyfriend takes his frustration out on you instead of making you feel safe to express your needs, then he's not a supportive partner. you deserve someone who takes delight in your pleasure and your body. believe me, we're out there.

[willsimpforanyone]

HIHIHI!!! I'M SOSO HAPPY YOURE BACK :3 May I request a Leo x reader smut where he gets home from work frustrated n eats the reader out 'til they're overstimulated? THIS IS SO WEIRD IM SORRY 😣ANYWAY I LOVE YOU, ITS OKAY IF YOU DONT DO THIS ASK, M JUST REALLY HAPPY YOU'RE BACK !!!!! (can I be 💀anon, if that's open? :3)

of course you can be skull anon (i'm on my laptop so i can't use emojis lol) also sweetheart this is definitely not weird this is an excellent request lmao lets gooooo

minors dni, includes leo being a little mean and eating the reader out until they cry, one singular spank, reader has a pussy but everything else is gender neutral and of course, all characters are over 18

---------------------------------

If I think back, really I could have predicted this from the moment I woke up.

Leo was gone by the time I opened my eyes, a note on the bedside table alongside a flower folded from a paperclip. The note was a mess of errors, his dyslexia playing up is always a sign of stress.

The second sign would be the wildly out-of-character short text responses I recieved, queries about his day being met with monosyllabic answers. There was nothing I could do, so I'd sat down at my laptop to work from home for the day, a little worried about him but figuring he was a big boy, he'd survive a hard day.

The third and most obvious sign that today did not go well was the jangling of the keys in the lock, followed by rapid-fire Spanish swearing. I'd laughed, saving my work and abandoning my laptop on my desk to go save Leo from the door or vice versa, whatever the case may have been.

Bright smile on my face, I'd opened the door and hardly gotten the first syllable of 'what did the door do to you?' out my mouth before I was promptly cut off by his lips on mine. Nothing gentle, nothing patient, just frustration and irritation and a need for something, anything, to go right.

Which led to my current position. My thighs shake around his head as I hold myself over his face, his fingers digging in firmly to my flesh as he pulls me back down. "One more."

A pathetic, almost-sob lurches from my throat as his tongue laps harshly at my pussy. My fingers clench at the headboard, holding on for dear life as Leo sucks and licks and tongue-fucks me into nearing my third orgasm of the evening.

"I c-can't," I wail, gasping and moaning as he laughs darkly against my pussy. He lets go of my thigh only briefly to land a firm smack on my ass.

"You can, and you will," he growls, voice low and leaving no room for questioning his command. His lips close around my clit and suck, looking up at me through half-lidded, dark, fierce eyes as I choke on a scream. Giving up on the headboard, I fist my hands in Leo's curly hair, whole body trembling as I come against his mouth for the third time. He laps it up greedily, burying his tongue as deep as he can to coax every drop of my release from me.

My body almost gives up on me, tipping to the side as my jelly legs fail to continue to hold me up. Still riding high and almost drunk on pleasure, I hardly notice when Leo catches me smoothly, flipping us around so he's above me. His lower face shines, swollen, slick lips parted as he pants with a filthy grin.

"You think you've got another one in you?"

He doesn't give me a chance to respond, promptly wriggling down the bed to stuff his face back between my legs, moaning against my oversensitive pussy as he gets another taste. My limp, exhausted body responds to his encouragement, every nerve on fire as he swirls his tongue around my folds.

"T-Too much," I whimper, useless hands half-heartedly fisting the sheets at my sides. "Can't- Leo, fuck, please, gonna fuckin' break me-"

"One more," he whispers against me, looking up from between my thighs and reaching his hands to lace his fingers with mine. "Give me one more, babe, then we're done, I promise."

I whine in protest on behalf of my tired body, but I nod. Leo grins and dives back down, nose nudging my swollen clit as he presses softer, languid open-mouthed kisses against my cunt. It's so much, pleasure feeling like a wrecking ball as my heart pounds against my ribs, and tears spring hot to my eyes.

It takes barely a few minutes for Leo to draw one last orgasm from me, my whole being exhausted and milked dry as I grind shakily against his tongue. His fingers squeeze mine tightly, grounding and reassuring as he drinks down my release, sighing happily as he makes me come for the fourth time.

With one final kiss, soft and sweet, between my legs, Leo crawls up the bed to press his lips to my forehead. "Thank you, oh, you did so good for me, I'm so proud of you, honey..."

I cling to him weakly, sniffling slightly as my body quivers underneath him, but a small smile tugs at my lips as he litters kisses all over my face. His praise is constant, his earlier frustration vanished as he wraps me up in his arms and gently wipes the tears from my cheeks.

"Shh, I know, it was a lot, huh?" he coos, nuzzling his nose into my cheek. "Thank you so much, I needed that, needed to feel my baby falling apart for me... let's get you cleaned up, hm?"

In a little bit, I'll get him to talk; ask him how his day was, why he was so upset earlier. For now, I'm dazed and exhausted but happy, more than content to stay cuddled up in Leo's arms, whispered promises of a homecooked meal settling warm in my chest.

-------------------------

a bit of a shorter one but i very much hope you enjoyed!

[luveline]

this is kinda self indulgent but a few hours ago i was trying to fix some problems with my email and im not tech savvy so i was frustrated and at that point i just cried and gave up LMAO can we get that with a comforting remus☺️☺️ i totally get if you'll refuse this request but if ever you take the time to write this thank you so much🫶❤️❤️

modern au

“I don't know how to do it,” you say. You're walking that fine line between frustration and upset, paralysed, and when you talk the emotion in your voice is obvious. 

Remus perks up, which is to say he hears it and immediately comes to attention. “Do what, dove?” 

“I can't fix this email thing, I thought I fixed it, but it's still broken.” 

Remus is about as tech savvy as you are, which isn't very. He uses his laptop for Microsoft Word and Scrivener; he barely opens his emails. “I can have a look?” he offers anyways. 

Remus sits on the bench beside you at the kitchen table and pulls your laptop toward him. You have a hard time telling him the problem, all choked up with heat and wishing it would fix itself, “I probably messed it up myself but nothing comes up when I search for it and I just don't understand it.” 

He does a couple of the things that you'd already tried with no success. At your wits end, you stand up from the bench thinking you'll make yourself a drink, a burning lump in your throat as you grab a glass from the draining board and fill it with water. 

“I'm sorry, dove, I don't think I'm gonna do it. I'll ring Mary.” 

“It's okay.” You press your hand to your eyes. It's not okay, you're fed up and tired and you hate using the laptop. “Why is everything so difficult?” 

“Dove–” 

“I don't care, it can stay broken.” Unbidden, a furious tear races down your cheek. 

You glare at the glass of water in your hand and put it down in the sink. Remus makes his sound, that loving hum of sympathy as he stands to sidle up behind you. “It's alright,” he says, testing the waters with a hand on your shoulder.

You slouch at his touch and he takes it for the go ahead, wrapping his arms around you from the back, his chin pressed to the skin just shy of your eye. “Don't be upset, lovely,” he encourages, hands roving up and down the front of you gently. “We'll fix it. Just take a breath.” 

“I don't know why it won't work,” you say, trying to be more angry than upset. 

“I'm sure we'll figure it out. You've been on the laptop for hours, why don't we go sit down and watch the telly for a bit?” He takes one of your hands, holds it to your chest as he curves in around you. “Please don't wind yourself up. I'll get someone to fix it, okay? It's not the end of the world.” 

You know it isn't, but this is nice. You turn in his embrace for a proper chest-to-chest hug, wiping your tears dry in his shoulder. “You sound so sad when you sniffle,” he whispers, chuckling fondly as you do. 

“Sorry. I'm just annoyed.” 

“I know. It'll be fine, don't stress out about it.” His hands fan out over your shoulders, an encompassment physically that mirrors the warmth of his vocal comfort, the mild roughness of his voice and the care put into each word. 

He always cares about things, even when they're small in the grand scheme. “Thank you for trying to fix it,” you say into his shoulder. “I feel better knowing there wasn't an easy solution.” 

“Well, there might be. Or we're both idiots,” he jokes. 

You laugh wetly, hooking your chin over his shoulder. “Maybe.” You sigh, feeling much less heavy than you had. “At least we're idiots together.” 

[haveateadude]

bleak horizons iii.

summary *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ opening up it's not easy, isn't it?

warnings *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ depression, self-harm mention, and disordered eating (not explicitly mentioned but you can clearly see it's there)

author notes *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ helloooo welcome to part 3!!!!!! i think this might be the last part (if u have an idea on how this can continue feel free to tell me. u can send a request or just leave the idea in the comments). also just saying, this stuff is based on MY issues and experiences with mental health, so this might not be truthful to everyone. my insta is @/starsfinder_ if anyone wants to vent or just talk :))

remember you're not alone if you're going through a shitty moment, trust me!! ik everyone says to ask for help, and even if that's soo fucking true i know some people are not listened (even if that's literally a fucking RIGHT). so, as i said, you can dm me <33 take care of yourselves pleaseee. can't stress enough how much i want y'all to know you're not alone. hi. hello. i care!!!!!!!! and i'm here!!!!!! so please listen to me when i say everything's going to be alright :)) i love youuuuuu

also, sorry for any mistakes. i'm sooo tired rn lmao

pt1 — pt2 — pt3

I told you a lie, désolé, mon amour

I'm trying my best, don't know what's in store

The next week, I stepped out of therapy crying. I got into the car, slamming the door.

“Hey,” Ellie says softly, looking at me with her hands resting on the wheel, her gaze full of worry. “You okay?”

“Drive.”

“But—”

“Just drive.”

“Okay.”

Ellie starts driving. I wipe my tears, feeling overwhelmed. My mother had called yesterday and made me feel like shit. I wasn't doing my best at school. Ellie and I hadn't gone out since Christmas. So basically, everything was shit. I've also had urges to relapse, and they're just not going away.

I cry. Ellie drives. This is okay. It's okay. Except that it's not, and I haven't told my therapist anything about myself yet. My mother hasn't spoken to me in weeks, and my father sent a cat video on WhatsApp this morning. And Ellie’s knuckles are turning white from how hard she’s gripping the wheel, which makes my heart ache because I know she cares. It makes me want to tell her everything, but the words are stuck in my throat, and I can't seem to get them out.

We arrive at the apartment a couple of minutes later. Ellie doesn’t immediately open the doors, and I've calmed down enough to answer when she asks, “Baby? Are you feeling okay?”

I nod, looking away. The people that I see walking around look sad.

“I’m fine.”

“It’s okay if you’re not, though,” she says. I stay quiet, doubting it. Ellie nudges me with her elbow, looking for an answer. “Hey.”

“Yeah,” I say. “I know.”

Ellie pats me on the thigh before getting out of the car. I get out, too. I don't bother eating dinner that night; I just go straight to bed and fall asleep.

The next few days felt monotonous. I've fallen back into my sadness, the type that isn't bitter but sweet. It doesn't make me want to relapse. It makes me want to stay in bed more hours than I'd like, takes my appetite away, and leaves me feeling nothing but numbness.

I wake up, go to work, study, attend uni, come home, and sleep. The cycle repeats and repeats, and I'm so, so very tired.

Today, I took the day off. I knew I was too tired to do anything, so I planned to rot in bed. Ellie knocks on the door, but I don't answer. I hear the door creak open and the light from the living room creeping in.

"Hey," Ellie says, her voice coming from behind me. "Mind if I lay next to you?"

"It's fine," I say with a hoarse voice. I feel the bed sink at my side, and then Ellie is behind me, wrapping her arm around my torso and nuzzling her face into my neck, leaving a kiss right there. I feel cozy and comfortable. I don't know if this will last. I hope it does because it's a feeling I've never experienced before—someone comforting me? That has never happened.

"Do you want to talk about what's going on?" she asks. I stay quiet. "I care about you. I'm worried."

I do want to talk about it, but at the same time, I don't.

"I'm fine."

"You always say that… You haven't gotten out of bed since you came from work, and the frozen lasagna you were going to make for yourself last weekend has been in the fridge since then." She stays quiet for a second, her fingertips caressing my arm. "You're not doing fine, baby."

Millions of thoughts go through my head. Thoughts I don't say. I don't want her to leave; I don't want her to see how I feel.

"I'm trying, though." It's easy to say since Ellie isn't looking at my face directly. Tears threaten to spill from my eyes. I blink them away; I blink, blink, and blink again. Fast.

Ellie stays quiet, her breath tickling my neck. She kisses the back of my head again, her hand holding mine. I hold it to my chest. "I know. But you don't have to be alone in this."

That hits me like a truck. I wasn't expecting to be held by her, let alone her saying I don't have to be alone. A tear falls from my eye, landing on the pillow. I sniff, and Ellie holds me tighter, not saying anything. She tucks a strand of hair behind my ear with her free hand and kisses my temple.

"I'm sorry," I say, in a moment of pathetic weakness. She hugs me even closer.

"Hey, no. Don't apologize. C'mon, turn around."

I let go of her hand, turning around. Her left hand cups my face and she kisses my cheek, then my forehead, and then she kisses the tears that fall on my cheeks. When she pulls away, she gives me a small smile, "You're going to be okay."

She doesn't want you. She's your friend; she doesn't want you. She will fall in love with you, not your brain nor your scars, and when she finds out about the way you think, she'll leave.

I wake up on Ellie's chest, it feels good to be comforted, I've found. Her phone is on the nightstand, so I just reach it and look at the time. It's eight o'clock. I've fallen asleep for two hours. I try to make myself more comfortable on her chest, attempting not to wake her, but my movements fail and she stirs.

"Hey," she says, her voice still laced with sleep. "What time is it?"

"It's still night," I say, closing my eyes. "We slept for two hours.'

"Feeling better?" I feel comfortable enough to shake my head. "Do you want to talk about it? I told you, I'm worried. And don't bullshit me with the whole 'I'm fine' shit, yeah?"

I stay quiet as her thumb caresses my back, "Did I tell you why I'm going to therapy?" Ellie shakes her head. "Well—back home I had some… issues. Mental health stuff related. I kept going back to depressive episodes. And one day I just asked for help from my mom, because I—I just couldn't stop self harming."

"Baby," Ellie says, hugging me tighter and kissing the top of my head. "What happened? Did your mother react well?"

"Yeah. Surprisingly. I got help. Got better. Sometimes it comes back, and I still get urges sometimes, but I can control it. It isn't as bad as it was before. But lately, it's just—yeah."

"You don't do that anymore, do you?" She asks, worried.

"No," I shake my head. "Not anymore."

"And what about the urges, do you still get them?" I nod, slowly. Ellie plays with my hair. "And therapy? Is it helping?"

"I haven't told her anything, yet. I—I don't know, I can't talk about it."

"What if I go to the next session? If you're okay with that, of course. If you still don't feel comfortable we can look for another therapist or another way to get you help."

I hide my face in her chest when she says the last word. I don't know why I've been refusing to get help. I don't know why I don't like that word. I sigh as Ellie stops playing with my hair and begins rubbing my back.

"I think—I think I would like it if you go with me."

"Okay. Okay, then. I'll go." The room falls to silence again for a few seconds. I feel ashamed for telling her. "I'm sorry you have to go through this… I wish I could do more."

"You're doing more than enough," I assure her. It's my time to hug her tighter. "You’re the first person I’ve talked to about this."

"Yeah?" She seems surprised. "I'm glad you talked to me. I'm here for you if you need anything—I mean it. You just have to tell me, I will listen… You could've told me sooner."

"I'm sorry."

"Hey, don't apologize. I’m just saying, I'm here for you. I've been there for you, always. And… is there something I can do to help?"

"Just be there," I say. "That's enough."

"Mhm, I'll stay."

I think she wants you, a little voice in my head says. I think she loves you, and I don't think she'll ever leave.

Maybe I'll be okay, after all.

[magneticallyyours]

Hi there, currently simping for our mans, Magneto. So what I've been thinking, I know magnetic therapy is pseudoscience but I would really love it if you wrote a fic where the reader comes back home from work and she gets body pain from the stress (totally not self projecting with psychosomatic pain lol) and Erik overall comforts her and uses his mutation to make the pain subside. Thanks in advance btw.

After dying for months, you're my first ask that I finished! Sorry for the delay, I just got out of writer's block 😭

Erik Lehnsherr/Max Eisenhardt x Reader || Fade Into You

SUMMARY You've been overworking yourself again, coming home to a worried Erik and welcoming bed. But he isn't willing to watch you suffer like this, and so takes matters into his own hands. For a night, his magnetic fields are used for something other than justice.

TAGS: Fluff, Comfort, Reader's gender left ambiguous, Caring Erik, Magnetic therapy, Cuddles.

CW: None. Just that magnetic therapy is pseudoscience but this is fucking X-Men lmao

WORDCOUNT: 1.2k

A/N: This is left ambiguous (intentionally) so you can headcanon Fassbender, 97, Krakoa, or any version of Magneto that wouldn't butcher you. Enjoy?

★★★★★★★★★

Man, today was a stressful work day. You just barely managed to get through it, owing to the fact that you'd come home to Erik at the end of it all. The moment you stepped in through the front door, Erik was already there, seemingly waiting for you. The moment you plopped down on the couch, his eyebrows furrowed with concern. 

“Welcome home, my dear. You look– exhausted.” 

Well, there's that. He always picked up on the littlest of things, both out of care and because of how meticulous he always was. He kind of had to be, in a way. You groaned, gently massaging your shoulder. “It's just.. Everything hurts, Erik. I feel exhausted.” He listened to you speak attentively, shifting closer to let you rest your head on him.

“I've told you so many times to–” Oh, not this again. He turned into somewhat of a doting mother at times. You cut him off, huffing. 

“Not to exert myself, I know. But I have to work, Erik.” 

He tsks at that, choosing not to press further. It's clear that you weren't going to listen to his words, and frankly he wouldn't blame you for it. 

“May I at least prepare some dinner for you?” 

He hoped you wouldn't deny him this simple request, because he hated seeing you tired like this. Whenever you'd come home late and tired, or when you fell ill, he wouldn't take any of your ifs or buts. He would push you back into bed and force you to let him take care of you until you recovered. Ah, he was a character. But he was cute.

“..Sure thing, I'd love that.” You agreed, making him nod. He gave you a blanket before he pressed a kiss to your forehead, swiftly making it to the kitchen. It felt like no time at all when your eyes began to droop, all the sleep deprivation and pain catching up to you at last. Your muscles and bones were aching, prompting you to lay down against the inviting surface of the couch. It was so warm and cozy. Kind of like him. That little nap, if you could call it that, was a temporary reprieve, for your body was still aching all over. When your eyes opened, you could see a very upside down Erik Lehnsherr looming over you. He was more funny than intimidating like this. He frowned when you laughed. 

“Well, darling, don't just laugh. Sit up. I'm finished with dinner.” 

After a minute of rolling around, unwilling to get up (much to Erik's chagrin), you finally complied. He was sitting beside you, bowl of stew in hand. A spoonful floated to your lips, waiting for you to eat. You opened your mouth to protest, but he used the opportunity to slip some stew into your mouth.

“There. Good, isn't it?” 

It really was. He'd used only the vegetables you'd like, cooked soft yet not mushy. For a night like this, it was perfect.

“It's.. edible.”

He smirked. He knew you liked it. 

“Good enough for me.” 

He didn't move an inch until you were full and satisfied, but he didn't grab a bowl for himself. That made you press, “Aren't you eating?”

“Don't you worry about me. We're getting you to bed first.” 

“But–” “No arguing, słoneczko. Up.” 

He waited a beat, but upon noticing that you weren't making any effort to move, he tsked. Time to take matters into his own hands, then. He stood up, scooping you into his arms.

“Hey! Put me down-”

“You don't mean that, I'm sure. You're going to bed.” 

You tried to protest, but he was right. The bed seemed more inviting than ever, especially considering you didn't have to walk there. But you also wanted to spend some time with Erik, so you didn't know which to choose. While you were mulling the pros and cons over in your head, he gently set you down on the bed.

“Wait here.”

He left your bedroom, returning with a bowl of stew for himself before sitting down at your bedside.

“Are you going to just.. eat beside me, Erik?” 

He clicked his tongue. “Just wait, liebchen. I'm not going anywhere, if that's what you're wondering.” 

He held the spoon in his hands this time, eating nonchalantly. Slowly, you feel a faint hum fill the air, as Erik lifts his hand, fingers curling slightly as if cradling something. You feel it immediately—an almost imperceptible shift, like the space around you has become weightless. The tension locked in your muscles loosens as a gentle force spreads through your limbs, coaxing the pain away.

"Relax," he murmurs, his voice steady, reassuring. Another spoonful of stew. “I've got you. You just have to lay back and let me help.” 

Like, damn. Who could refuse something like that? Especially with that look in his eyes. He wasn't even exerting himself, something like this second nature to him. That's what made it even better. He was so talented at this. 

The magnetic field he manipulates isn't harsh or violent. It's gentle, like a warm pair of hands on your body. They work their way over every muscle, gently prodding at your back. You couldn't help but let out a relaxed sigh as he took his time with you, eating wordlessly as the sleepiness took over. His eyes stayed fixed on you. 

It felt like forever as the process continued, but you weren't complaining. You didn't want this to end. You wanted this fucking– magnetic spa, almost, to continue till the end of time. But then the ache subsided, leaving a warmth in its place. Not from heat, but from peace. He shook his head with a smile.

“See? Sometimes listening to me isn't so bad.” 

He spoke, matter-of-factly, but teasing regardless. Then he got up to go put the bowl and spoon away, but you caught his hand. He looked down, confused. 

“Don't tell me it didn't work–”

“Stay. I want you.”

He chuckled, wagging his finger.

“Oh my. You have to be patient, Schatzi. I'm going to join you in bed after I put these away. So stay there.”

You groaned, shoving him weakly. He left regardless after pressing a kiss to the back of your hand, returning too late, in your eyes. He didn't let you protest for another moment, getting under the covers beside you. It was his turn to comply. A strong arm snaked around your waist, pulling you close. So protective and warm. It made you feel fuzzy. 

“Sleep, dearest. You need it.” 

His thumb rubbed comforting circles into your hips, lulling you into sleep. You could tell he was using his magnetic fields again to ease you. You hummed lowly, nuzzling into him. 

While you thought you were going to stay awake longer, perhaps talk to him, you'd fallen asleep in minutes. He relaxed, relieved that you were finally asleep. As promised, though, he didn't move a muscle. He laid there, tenderly looking at you until he felt tired enough to sleep. 

Oh, and: Tomorrow was a weekend, but you still had the alarm set earlier to spend time with Erik. Tch, you needed your beauty sleep. He turned it off. Such a villain… 

★★★★★★★★★

[vinnyhongnsfwgurl]

1st Vinny Hong FanFic? I literally have no idea what this should be LOL

Hello all Windbreaker fans and Vinny Hong lovers. This is my first Vinny Hong x female reader fanfic. I hope you enjoy and comments/feedback is always welcome! Thanks :3

So, I didn't realize what kind of fanfic this would be after I finished writing it LMAO. Complete despair and heartbreak hahaha. I just chose to write and not think to hard. tbh I'm pretty happy with it. Let me know what you think :) .... also I did not proof read haha I am lazy.

I think I'll do a part 2 to this one!

"y/n? ...... y/n?"

"Y/N?!"

You're head snaps up to look at your mother sitting in the hospital bed next to you. She looked at you slightly worried.

She tilted her head as she asked "Are you okay? I called your name multiple times."

You sat up straighter in your chair and nodded. "Yes. Sorry. I, uh, just got lost in my thoughts for a moment." A lot had happened in the past couple of weeks. My mother got very sick and ended up in the hospital for a second time, nearly dying due to a brain aneurysm. It had put a lot of stress on every part of our lives, mostly financially. We weren't poor, but we certainly did not have the luxury to not work and stay in the hospital for extended periods.

I had thought about picking up extra hours at my part-time job, but I knew it wouldn't help much and I knew my studies would suffer. I was already struggling to keep my grades up. Besides my part-time job, I had to train for the upcoming final race of League of Streets. I was a part of Hummingbird and it was amazing but like my personal life, it was a mess. So much had happened with our team.

The most recent event was Vinny leaving our team deciding to ride with the Ghost crew. He started doing small races for money, which were broadcasted online. I had seen a few. Everyone was confused and upset including me. The whole reason we created Hummingbird was to compete in LOS and win the price money for Vinny's mother but I guess he had different plans in mind.

"It'll be okay honey" my mom said as she reached for my hand. I let let her hold my hand. It was warm and reassuring.

I smiled. "I know mom. I'm glad you're alright .... I was really scared actually." I could feel the pressure behind my eyes build up.

My mom started tearing up. "I know. I know y/n. but it's okay, I'm okay." She squeezed my hand.

I just nodded. "yeah."

After a few minutes and making sure my mother didn't need anything, I hugged her goodbye and started making my way out of the hospital. I took a seat on a bench that was stationed right next to the entrance of hospital. I had taken a bus here and planned on taking it to get back home. It only took me ten minutes to get to the bus stop, so I had a bit of time before I had to leave. I was really tired and too stressed. I found myself looking for more quiet moments out of my day.

I looked out toward the street across from the hospital. It was already dark out, but there was quite a bit of traffic. Honking interrupted the empty, docile night every now and than.

I heard footsteps come around the corner that ended abruptly once they caught up to the bench I was sitting at. As I turned my head to see what or who it was, I hear a familiar voice.

"What are you doing here?"

Vinny. It was all I thought as my eyes met his. His red eye seemed strikingly brighter than it usually was. Maybe it's just because I hadn't seen him in awhile.

"Oh. I was visiting my mom. She recently had surgery." I explained. ".... Are you hear to see your mom?" I asked.

He was quiet for a second before answering my question. "Yeah, she's staying here."

"MMm that's good. Glad to hear she is getting treatment" I said.

"What about your mom? Is she okay?"

"oh yeah! The surgery went well, so everything is good." I gave a sheepish thumbs up. I always became painfully aware of how awkward I felt when interacting with Vinny. I was a fairly shy person and it didn't help how handsome I thought he was. It took time in the beginning for us to get along and establish a relationship. It wasn't hard for me to figure out soon after that I was falling in love with him.

There was a lot I learned about him after Hummingbird was formed and the more I learned the more I desired to be near him. He was hot headed and pretty reserved, but it never really bothered me. I always went out of my way to greet him at practice and I chat with him when I could. I never cared if it was just small talk.

He just stared at me for a moment before saying "Good to hear that."

I knew what what was coming next, or what wasn't. This would be the end of our conversation. I didn't want it to be.

"How have you been?" I asked.

"I'm fine." He said plainly.

"And Jack?" following it up with a smile.

"He's fine too."

Man of few words I thought. I was used to it but I always wondered what actually behind those words: I'm fine.

"Are you really doing fine? I know I'm probably not the first person you think of when you want to talk to someone, but you're my friend. I'm here for you." I blurted out without much thinking.

When I had mentioned how confusing and upset I was when he left our crew, it was an understatement. I was sad and hurt. I also felt so helpless. He left us all behind and had no desire to return.

I looked down at the backpack I held in my arms. There was so much I wanted to say, but none of it seemed enough.

"I'm sorry for everything that's happened. I know you're having a hard time. I wish you hadn't had to leave the team."

"I don't know why you're apologizing, y/n. You don't need to." He replied.

Vinny walked up closer to me until he stood just a few inches from my feet. I looked up and he gaze had softened just a bit.

"You don't need to worry about me. Just focus on yourself. You have a lot going on."

"Yeah."

There was a moment of silence as Vinny and I held each other's gaze.

Then Vinny turned to leave. "I'll see you later y/n."

Before he took another step, I reached for his hand. It was a light grasp, just enough to stop him.

"Come back to Hummingbird ..... at least, at some point. We'll wait for you. It's nothing without you"

Vinny just stared at me before pulling his hand away from my mine.

"Y/n."

"It doesn't matter if it's not tomorrow, or the next day, or weeks from now! J-just come back. Please." I could feel a increase in my heart rate and the pressure behind my eyes building up again.

Vinny sighed and turned away from me.

"There's no reason for me to come back." He said sternly. "There's nothing you or the others can offer me." He continued has he started walking away.

Something warm slid down the right side of me cheek. I blinked and more came out. I was crying.

I just stood there as I continued to watch him walk away. My crying only worsened and I could feel a lump form in my throat.

I can't give up on you Vinny I thought as I recollected the memories of us together and how much our relationship progressed.

I just can't Vinny. I won't. I love you.

After he was well out of my sight, I finally left for the bus station. I cried the entire way.

For once, I wished it wasn't so quiet out.

[jasonshousewife]

happy fianls week to everyone who's suffering like me...

college student au jason todd x reader to motivate myself!!

You're stressed out so jason doesn't dare to wake you up when he finds you taking a nap on his lap. He's looking down at your face and he can't help but smile cause you look so damn cute like he's one of those boyfriends who keeps bad picture of their girlfriends and tell them it's their favorite lmao anyway he looks down at you smiling, but after few minutes he knows he'll have to wake you up or you'll be more stressed out. He thinks he'll at least take you to bed if you're too tired to study more.

"Babe, wake up."

He says and taps on you gently, and you hummed and pressed your face harder into his stomach. You don't want to wake up yet. That made Jason chuckle and he really doesn't have a heart to wake you up so he gently holds you up and puts you down on bed. He tugs you in and kiss you good night.

... you wake up three hours later and get angry at him for not waking you up earlier (this is just me sorry)

this was supposed to be a motivation for myself to study but it ended up being a motivation to go to sleep hahaha i'm screwed

[midnight-mourning]

I'm back! (for the most part)

Hello, hope everyone is doing alright, needed a few more days than I expected. BUT, here now and slowly working on being more active. May take me a bit but plan to get caught up with everything and the likes. Going to release promptobers throughout the next couple of days, along with anything else I'm currently working on. Expect some updates on the oneshot, ch. 35 and so on as well ^-^ Thank you all for your paitence and hope to be back to regularly posting soon!

some medical/mental stuff below the cut if you're curious, I was going to save this for the ch. 35 note, but figured I might as well just say it now as it's part of the reason my return was delayed

SO, haven't really spoken on it but I've had a sinus infection for about two months now and gonna be so fr with you all, it's sucked. Like, i've never had one this bad before and it just totally knocked me on my ass. I've been tired, dazed/brain fog, some bad headaches/face pain, all the really fun stuff. I made the joke that I spent like two days of being 23 healthy and the rest of the time I've been sick lmao

But anyway, I kept waiting to see if it would clear up on it's own (and for like a week or so there my health insurance was messed up so there was that to deal with) and it just, didn't. And with everything going on with research (esp this past week) I just made myself tough through it hoping it would get better, and it didn't. So, finally went to the doctor and got on some meds and I'm feeling a LOT better.

The point to all this is to say, I've had no motivation to write beyond very small bursts and thus why I've been putting out promptobers but not the latest chapter of CS. My energy has just been super low, and I had a lot of brain fog for several weeks and I just, couldn't bring myself to do it. Maybe it was a little bit of writer's block from stress too, not super sure

I took the break mainly bc things with research just got, really shitty for a few days there and I just needed time away from everything for bit esp with the sickness issues. Thankfully, things are working out a bit better this week people-wise and hopefully we'll continue to go up from here.

As for why I was gone the few extra days, the stuff they put me on made me feel physically great, but it also made me feel like doing absolutely nothing for a day or so. But, figured out the timing for those so now it's manageable to get through the next week and hopefully I'll be fully back to normal by then ^_^

TL;DR if you can go to the doctor when you're sick, go. It is NOT worth the discomfort, stress, etc to not. Also, take a break when you're stressed, does wonders for your mental health

well, since you took the time to read all of this, enjoy these pictures of a cat that showed up at my parents place a few days ago. She’s a bengal! Which makes her the second stray that's shown up that is incredibly rare/bred to look like that (the first is Nubs, my idiot who eats everything if any of you recall). Not to worry, she went home to (hopefully) her forever family early yesterday :)

[goatcheesecak3]

Bus stop part 7

Adam Faulkner-Stanheight x F!reader

Check masterlist for m!reader version! (If it's not up, send me an ask to remind me!! I always forget to post them lmao)

Warnings: none, just pure fluff

Summary: just a little glimpse into life living with Adam

Y/n and Adam had been living together for about a month now, and despite the stress of the move, life couldn't be better. The pair now resided in a cosy apartment in a clean, safe, and friendly part of the city. The rent was a little higher than their old places, but with rent being split between the two of them, it was manageable. The walls were covered in an array of posters, artwork (some thrifted, some painted by Adam), and of course, plenty of framed photographs that Adam had taken. While putting up these pictures Adam had remarked over and over again that this made it feel like a "real home." In his childhood home, family portraits were pretty much unheard of, so it was a non negotiable that a picture of Adam, y/n and their new family member- a black cat named Frank- took pride of place on the small mantle in the living room.

Days in this new home would often start with the smell of coffee and toast, but on weekends y/n would sometimes spoil Adam with pancakes and crispy bacon drenched in syrup. This was the case on a particular lazy Saturday morning.

"Adammmmm" y/n whispered from the doorway to the bedroom.

The sleeping Adam responded with a grunt, and a mumbled "five more minutes," before pulling the covers over his head"

"Fine, I guess I'll just have to give all your pancakes to Frank"

That got his attention.

As if he were a sleeper cell, only activated by the word "pancakes" Adam shot out of bed, rubbing his sleepy eyes.

He looked ever so cute in black boxers and a baggy band tshirt, his hair elegantly tousled and his sharp nose twitching at the smell of breakfast.

"Come on, sweetpea," y/n smiled lovingly, holding out a hand for him to take.

Adam took more than a hand, opting instead to hug y/n's waist and lean his tired head on her shoulder.

"You are literally my dream woman" he mumbled, and y/n could hear the smile in his voice.

"If I'd known pancakes were gonna illicit a response like that, I would have made them the first day I met you" y/n chuckled, hugging Adam back and kissing his cheek.

The pair made their way to the beat up sofa in the front room. It was the same one from Adam's old apartment, the same one they'd shared their first kiss on. It was falling apart and needed patching up on a regular basis, but it was too special to throw out. Curled up on the sofa, drinking hot coffee and inhaling their pancakes at lightning speed, Adam and y/n (and Frank the cat) channel surfed all morning. It was a perfectly uneventful day, and after all the chaos that Adam had been through, it was moments like this, the beauty and joy in pure monotony, that just solidified to him how perfect life could really be.

A/n sorry this took so long! I sorta lost my creative spark over the last few weeks due to some mental health issues, but I'm starting to feel like myself again, so hopefully more fics will be out soon! I've got a bunch in the drafts that I've been working on :^)) I know this was short but I hope you enjoyed!

[smolcinnamonchipmunk]

It's well past the timeframe that I saw this trend (like one, maybe two months? My memory is shit), but whatever. I have a headache from not eating today, barely been able to force myself to eat, and overall feel like shit so I'm gonna ramble. Or be self-indulgent, depending on how this is interpreted, I guess

Everything I see about people liking vore for comfort, or protection, or yada yada yada, sappy stuff. Which, like, don't get me wrong, I love that shit too

But for me it's about the ISOLATION

I don't know how to describe it exactly, and I don't know if my attempt will get the point across, but I'm just fucking tired

Like 'Say I'm fine then thousand yard stare for the entire work day, oops, now it's three months later' kind of tired, the 'Just gotta make it one more day' kind of tired, the 'I find joy in nothing I do but I'm too stubborn and exhausted to do anything about it so I sit in it' kind of tired

Coupled with work to being called lazy and irresponsible by older family members, again, and just thing after thing after thing after thing after Thing After THING

I ain't special, I know this. Everyone deals with these kind of things, especially as adults, but I've always been easily overwhelmed. It just wasn't an issue growing up cause I'm a Shutdown rather than someone who maybe cries or gets frustrated enough to lash out first. Now I'm an adult, have been for over half a decade, and you're just kind of expected to know how to handle things even if you weren't taught them, expected to roll with the punches and live with the stress

Point is, I see vore as an escape above all, seeking comfort in the isolation and alone of it. Yeah, I'm surrounded by someone or something, but I like to think of it as more of a reprieve. No one can touch me, or talk to me, or fucking bother me if I'm literally placed away from existence (basically I want my own sensory deprivation chamber lmao)

I definitely won't say no to the trope of the prey being liked by the pred though. I'm not gonna say admired cause that feels narcissistic and I can't think of other words rn (loved doesn't quite fit either in my brain), but, like, kind of the happiness I feel when looking at my cats. They just exist and I'm happy about them

Idk why someone would feel the same way about me, but considering I feel like a worthless, unproductive piece of shit who can't even exist right half the time, being eaten kind of feels like a decent trade off to a pred (yes I think about friendships kind of like transactions, yes I know it's unhealthy, but if my friend just wants me to sit with them quietly like a Creature or play games in return for their fantastic company I'm down, I just want to do more for them but am tired and broke lol)

Like, I'm not good at working many things, or organizing, or being productive, or good at conversation/comforting, or even existing, but the thought of being eaten kind of gives a sense of purpose, in a way

Kind of, like, when I pet a stray cat or feed it and it's happy. Like, someone else maybe would have reached out and made them happy, but maybe they wouldn't have and how lucky am I to be making them this happy, you know? Maybe I feel like shit and don't necessarily want to see tomorrow, but I can keep making them happy

I don't fucking know if I made any sense and the phantom smells are kicking in, so I'm gonna go lay down or whatever. Fucking, isolation and purpose, I guess