#I'm still sad about the ending so I'm trying to cheer myself up

[chimchiri]

Scrunchy Nose Collection! ♥

[wolfiesmoon]

When you suddenly cry in front of them :(

Riddle, Vil, Kalim, Malleus x gn!reader (riddle's and vil's are explicitly post overblot tho it's not super important)

i'm back to entering tartarus every day (school started again) so i thought i might as well distract myself with some hot twst guys :)

i havent been very active i know, i just cant get myself to do anything at all these days 😞i am so so sorry for making a kinda lazy short collection of blurbs but i need to get back into my writing groove somehow

(as a sidenote, i'm worried some of these might be ooc? i sincerely apologise if they are :( )

RIDDLE honestly doesn't know what to do with himself. He never really got the comfort he needed whenever he cried as a child so he had no idea how to comfort you now. He scolds himself internally for not immediately acting and just kind of freezing up beside you so he panics and tries to recall of all the times he saw someone else comforting others in order to end the extremely awkward tension as quickly as possible. He pats your back somewhat rigidly and says "There, there." In an all too awkward manner. You're caught off guard so hard by the sheer akwardness of Riddle's comfort technique that you burst out laughing, troubling Riddle even further. "W...Why are you laughing now?" The dumbfounded expression on his face is the perfect medicine for forgetting your troubles just now. Riddle unintentionally just cheered you up. After the incident, he seemingly becomes less strict with you and starts asking about how you're doing umprompted, which always pleasantly surprises you. Sometimes, Trey even shows up at Ramshackle dorm, holding a tart of your favourite flavour and saying he got orders from Riddle to deliver it to you.

VIL drops his usual strict nature for a bit. Of all people, he would be the one who could tell you were constantly acting strong and unbothered by everything going on around you. He thought of it equal parts admirable as he did foolish. Such intense emotion is not something to keep bottled up inside you and you made him realise that. His expression is surprisingly soft as he places one arm on your back, gently stroking it. He talks you through your feelings with a big sense of maturity and care and you're suprised by just how much he cares for you and your feelings. You don't exactly get that same impression when he's scolding you for not sitting straight or not wearing your uniform properly... regardless, you're very thankful for his words, even the harsher ones about needing to tell someone about things like this. "Tell me, if you must. I will always listen." After the incident, nothing much changes, really. Atleast from the perspective of others. He still gets on your case for not wearing your uniform properly, but he also asks about how you're doing when he gets the chance and does not accept simply "fine" or "okay" for an answer. You simply must elaborate why that is.

KALIM enters big brother mode. He's comforted crying siblings for various reasons before so what makes you any different? He gives you a tight hug, gently rubbing your back and trying to cheer you up with comforting phrases. He'd also try making jokes you to cheer you up and the puns are so bad you might as well start laughing. He didn't even start asking what's wrong but instead waited for you to tell him yourself. He surprised you with how mature (or perhaps just experienced) he is when it comes to crying people. You feel much better even only after a few minutes and you ask Kalim how you can thank him for hearing you out. "Seeing you smile again is reward enough!" He replies and you feel like crying again (but this time not from sadness or stress). After that incident, he always personally invites you to Scarabia parties, hoping they might inject a little joy in your life and keep your mind off things. If you're not a fan of parties, he takes you on carpet rides around the dorm instead.

MALLEUS is shocked into silence. You were smiling at him as sweetly as you always do just a moment ago... He knows how to comfort someone in theory, but now that he has to put it into practice, it feels like he's forgotten everything. He needs to show you that you can rely on him when it comes to your comfort, and that includes crying around him. This might just be one of the most heartbreaking sights he's ever had the displeasure of witnessing. He vows to himself that he never wishes to see you cry again (unless it's at your wedding) and would do anything to prevent it. He wordlessly pulls you into a secure hug, worried that if he does anything else, you might start crying even more. You hug him back and just sob in his arms, thankful for his warm embrace. "It will all be okay, child of man. I'm here, after all." And somehow, you can't help but trust those words with every fiber of your being. After the incident, Malleus ends up confessing what happened to Lilia and Lilia goes into one of those "Oh, how my baby has grown..." rants. But he also does say that Malleus should start inviting you to new places to keep your mind off things and help you let loose. So he does just that, with an added sprinkle of gargoyle-hunting and gargoyle facts. You're now very well educated about gargoyles lol.

[micahulrichdraws]

I don't think self-deprecation or concern for the person's well-being is ever going to come across well to someone saying they like what you do. Maybe I'm missing something, but there are reasons to like your art besides being miserable. Even if only the truly miserable liked your work, responding to them by pointing out how miserable they must be wouldn't feel great for them. Your art isn't giving them depression, and it's not like you're contributing to net suffering by making art with ~themes~, so it seems unnecessary to bring up. You suggested that if you struggle to enjoy life, and you make something, anyone who resonates will also struggle to enjoy life. I disagree. Some people will like it for completely shallow reasons. Some people have empathy for others' suffering. You can have a decent life and no mental illness and probably still appreciate a well-drawn skeleton. I don't know what kind of art a perfect world would produce, but any world where people are mortal is going to have sadness, and some art will reflect that. Yours isn't uniquely dark.

Sorry if you've gotten 100 asks saying this same thing. I wasn't sure based on the ones you responded to, and I just found your blog. I know it's sort of a joke, bc you do still sell art prints and stuff, so you clearly are okay with people liking your art. Tbh, I /had/ depression for a few years, so I'm not exactly proof against the theory that your art somolehow only appeals to depressed people. It seems unlikely, though. And the way you talk about your art as "garbage" kind of gave me flashbacks to the sort of self-deprecating humor I'd use when I hated myself. I don't know you or how you're doing, but that feeling made me want to say something.

You didn't just miss something, you missed like, everything I've ever said on my blog about like, everything to the point I'm not even sure this was intended for me? Like I'd break it down, point by point and be like 'no what are you smoking' but that'd be a waste of time after the 'why do you think my art gives people depression!?' part of whatever this is. Like, this is offensive levels of trying to make me be someone I'm not for the sake of a hypothetical argument against a strawman. So if, you want to take offense to who I am in case you misclick and end up here again here's an asshole enough of a response to give you a legitimate reason to find me intolerable:

Welcome to my page! I make art, jokes, and bullshit with folks to make people happy. I started doing this when I was big sad, because cheering people up cheers me up. Now, here's the crazy part: some people are very sad, and sometimes they tell me it makes them a small amount of happy, which gives me dopamine and makes me do it again. The word 'some' means 'not everyone', or even 'a fraction of a percentage'. For example, in this case, it means 'most people just like my drawings but some people get an extra lil bit out of it'. I don't take myself seriously because I know that the art world is insanely intimidating to those outside of it, and sometimes artists tend to be egotistical and condescending, a word that means 'having or showing a feeling of patronizing superiority'. Naturally, I do everything in my power to avoid that, because I'm a very 'gates open' kinda person.

So, here's the WILD part: in my perfect world I would've never had depression. Now, I know, that would have been inconvenient for you as someone who passed by my page one time, and I do apologize. I also apologize that I don't make 'dark art', because I like frogs and mice doing cool shit. Finally, I apologize for my art having -~*themes and concepts*~-, I know good art only comes from ChatGPT and that was my bad.

Sike, I didn't apologize, my fingers were crossed behind my back when I said that. Fuck you for thinking me not wanting to be around for a decade is 'worth' because I drew a mediocre skeleton, and because somehow sadness is necessary. That line of thinking is so awful, here's a video explaining it:

PS: the reason my friends and I in these parts call my art 'art garbage' is because that's what my professors called it back in school for like 4 years, back when I started this shitshow. Much love.

[irishmammonagenda]

Hii!! 🧚‍♀️It's Wee Emo anon 🍾

Really liked your last work, so here i am again

Can i request brothers reaction on MC who cry over small things?

Like they see little kitten on the street and - WHOOP! - they're bubbling sobbing mess

I'm kinda can't cry (sounds dramatic lol) and wanna MC to feel it instead of me 😬

Love your works, keep going bestie💐🏃‍♂️

HI WEE EMO <3 please ignore the fact you sent me this on april 27th and its now june i had gcses to prepare for 😔✊

anyway, who let you into my house 😧🤨

no seriously i've cried at multiple south park episodes. south park. sometimes i wanna cry when i see my dog i cannot be trusted i tear up so easily especially when im writing🙁

for not being able to cry that is not very good for you fr:

i used to not be able to cry + still only really tear up, some tears drip down and let out like 2 sobbing sounds before im good again, i dont even have to try and stop crying, two sobs and im done, but my biggest tip is, get tired like really sleepy to the point where your eyes water bc of tiredness then watch something really sad.

i ha to literally train myself to be able to cry again bro dw, i wish i could have a big long cry but like 3 mins of crying is better than none, trust me wee emo you'll feel better

#dontbottleupyouremotions

ANYWAY:

this was very hard to imagine their reactions to idk why, but i tried so 😔✊

grma wee emo for requesting <3 and grma everyone else for reading <3

Obey Me Brothers With a Sensitive MC <3

It was safe to say you were sensitive, back when Melanie Martinez's music was a lot better, you really could say that the song 'Crybaby' pretty much encapsulated your entire being, it still did, but you liked to think you were more mature in your music taste now. (You weren't)

Being suddenly catapulted into the Devildom did a number on your emotions, and you found yourself quite numb. But as you adjusted, and bonded with the others, you found that you were back to your usual self, which was a crybaby.

So then how do the brothers react?

LUCIFER

Great. Two Mammons.

At least Mammon No.2 (you) isnt a tsundere about it.

Lucifer does not like seeing you cry. Even if its because something is cute, (although he does find it quite adorable, not that he'd admit it)

This demon is of the opinion that tears should never disgrace your beautiful eyes.

He will invite you to listen to his records with him and purposely put on sad ones or really sweet ones so you grip onto him while you tear up,

He is a demon, after all. ;)

MAMMON

Finally. Someone who cries more than him!

It actually makes him feel safer around you, like you wont bully him for being more sensitive than his brothers.

Actually ends up dropping a lot of his tsundere act around you.

You watch movies together, but always have to check the Devildom version of 'doesthedogdie.com'

Idk, I feel like Mammon would give you a bit of bother for it at first but then slowly start to like, open up more, because he really does see himself in you like that.

LEVIATHAN

He blanks.

One day you start crying because of how cute the anime you both were watching was, Levi thought you were geniunely upset, so he tried to cheer you up.

You end up thinking that its really sweet and start crying harder.

Leviathan PANICKS.

Even now, he still gets really nervous when you start crying, and has popped into his demon form more times than he can count when you grab onto him and sniffle.

Please he's already so awkward he can't handle how cute you are.

You might make him start crying as well :(

SATAN

Satan 100% gets so angry he starts crying so he can kind of understand it.

He's just glad you cry over positive things :)

His favourite moment was definetly when you teared up over a small kitten. (He took several photos and also took the kitten home)

Like Lucifer he 100% invites you to read with him and picks the fluffiest most adorable romance he can find, or the saddest most heartbreaking romance he can find.

He likes when you cling onto him and look up at him with those big teary eyes.

He's a demon. What did you expect, ;)

ASMODEUS

He thinks you're adorable.

Any emotion on your face is adorable to him actually. <3

If you wear makeup he makes sure to get you waterproof mascara and other eye makeup so your beautiful tears dont ruin your beautiful makeup <3

If any of you remember that crying girl makeup trend? Yeah he deffo starts that up in the Devildom (a) to make you feel less embarrassed about it and (b) because he thinks youre so beautiful when you express yourself.

BEELZEBUB

He doesn't cry a lot, it's not exactly something that comes naturally to him at all.

Its not that he CANT cry or that he holds his tears back, its just that he doesn't normally process or reaction to things with tears.

Only in serious serious situations will he cry.

So when he sees you crying over one of those little onigiri things that are literally adorable, he thinks that you've somehow hurt yourself. (i nabbed this off of pinterest)

Beel panics, and mentally goes over the ingredients in his head, did he order something with an ingredient that was dangerous to humans?

He calms down when he realises that you're crying because it looks cute.

He feels you with that.

Makes an effort to take you to more places with food items displayed in cute ways.

Though you do have to look away while Beel cuts them up for you, otherwise you wouldnt be able to eat it.

BELPHEGOR

He laughs at you.

Point blank.

Originally when he's in the attic he uses your sensitivity as a way to manipulate you.

But post lesson 16, he really starts to appreciate it more.

This bastard will use his powers as the youngest sibling against you, he'll dress up in cute onesies and give you puppy eyes, all to coax you into taking naps with him.

Which you do.

I have no idea how half of these fuckheads would react tbh

[oliversrarebooks]

Rayan is from @sowhumpshaped's story Stray. I can't resist a sad wet cat man who thinks he knows best. This is set in the timeline where Rayan gets caught and tested to be a pet.

tw: dehumanization, conditioning, drugging, memory loss, facility/institution

"Did you -- did you actually say --" 

"That your results show that you're a pet, yes," the nurse affirmed with a big, cheerful smile. "You're very lucky we caught you for this silly little mistake before things ended up worse."

Rayan's heart dropped into his shoes. "Are you sure?" he blurted out before thinking. "I know the test is accurate, but -- there's never any mistakes? There have to be mistakes sometimes, right?"

The expression on her face was friendly but firm. "No, there are no mistakes. You know that."

"I know that..." He stared numbly at his hands. The test was accurate, of course. Everyone knew that. If it weren't, they'd have to worry about accidentally treating people as pets, which would be horrible. 

The test was accurate. Everyone knew that.

He felt sick.

"It's all right, poor dear. I know this must be a shock," she said. "You must have been struggling so much, weren't you?"

He didn't answer, still trying to process it all. A pet...

"Haven't you ever wondered if you might be a pet? When you see happy pets in the park, didn't you feel a longing inside?"

"I -- I did, but I thought that was because I wanted a pet for myself -- "

"That feeling was because a part of you deep down knew where you belonged," she said. "And now we've found you, and everything will be okay, you'll see. You won't have to struggle like that any more. You won't need to worry about big, scary people concerns like jobs and money and education. You'll be so much happier."

Rayan swallowed the lump in his throat. He had, secretly, sometimes felt that life would be easier as a pet, with no worries beyond pleasing his owner. He'd never vocalized these thoughts, worried that someone would think he was a strange deviant, like those people who pretended to be pets --

But if he was a pet all along, those thoughts would be normal, wouldn't they?

"What's going to happen to me now?"

"Well, dear, you've been trying so hard to be a person for so many years that you've picked up a lot of bad habits," she said. "That's not your fault, of course, you can't be blamed for trying your best. But now we have to train you out of all those nasty bad habits, do you see? It's not healthy for a pet to think it's a person."

That was exactly what he'd told 13, wasn't it? And he was just the same. No wonder he'd been so sympathetic.

He was bunching the hospital gown with both hands. "Will the training be hard?"

"For a sweet pet like you? No, I don't think it will be. I think you'll find the training to be very easy, much easier than pretending to be a person. It's going to be a big weight lifted from you. You'll see."

"And -- my memories --"

The nurse sighed. "That's an important part of the process, as I'm sure you know. Happy pets can't have those awful, distressing memories of trying to be a person. This is what's best for you."

It was what was best for pets, he knew that. So it must be what's best for him. But still, he didn't want to...

"It will be painless," she said reassuringly. "We're just going to give you some nice medicine for pets with bad habits and scary memories. It'll make you feel a little funny and sleepy, and in just a few days, you'll start to feel so much better."

He nodded, still feeling miserable inside. It felt like this should be happening to someone else, that it was a dream. That he'd wake up in his own apartment any minute now.

"Come with me, now. We have a treatment room all ready just for you. You won't have to worry about a single thing."

Rayan didn't argue or struggle as she gently ushered him forward and out of the room. His hands felt cold and his legs felt shaky. 

It was for the best, he reassured himself. If the test said he was a pet, he must be a pet. And if he was a pet, the treatment would make him feel better. The only reason he felt so bad was because he hadn't gotten the proper treatments for a pet. He'd always worried something had been wrong with him, and now he knew what the problem was, and was going to get it fixed.

He was going to be trained. He wouldn't have to worry about holding down a job or disappointing his parents any more than he already had by turning out to be a pet. He'd make some owner very happy.

...He was going to forget his family, his friends, the shelter, everything that made him happy...

It was for the best. It had to be. If it wasn't, if the test could be wrong, if the treatments weren't appropriate, then the whole pet system was monstrous. All of his friends at the shelter and all of the pet owners he knew weren't monsters. They were kind people, and they loved their pets and knew what was best for them.

What was best for him.

He'd feel a lot better about it all when he was treated.

The nurse guided him into an elevator, and they went down to a basement level, exiting out into a brightly lit corridor filled with doctors and nurses bustling about, but no pets that he could see. They walked down a hall and turned left, Rayan fighting his anxiety every step of the way, until the nurse pushed open a door and beckoned him inside.

It was a bit like a hospital room, with three walls in stark white and the fourth painted with a childish mural of a blue sky. The medical bed was lower to the ground than normal, and there was a low counter with a sink in it. There was a metal pet bowl and metal water bottle on the counter, a leash tacked onto the wall, and a crate of brightly colored toys in the corner.

"Here we are!" the nurse chirped. "Now you can just get comfortable and your new handler will be in shortly."

"...Okay." Rayan awkwardly situated himself on the bed and watched the nurse leave, and he was left alone with his own conflicted thoughts.

He couldn't help but wonder what they'd tell his parents. Would they be disappointed? Angry? Would they miss him? He hoped they would understand. Would his friends at the shelter find out? Did they ever suspect? Would they notice when he didn't turn up to --

The door opened, and a young person with hair cropped short and a white coat walked in. They were carrying a small paper cup in one hand and a basket containing a blanket and a few other things. "Hello there. I'm Kay, and I'll be your handler for your treatment," they said with a smile, setting down her things on the table. "Oh, you poor thing. You just found out that you're a pet, I've been told. You must be so scared and confused."

Rayan could only nod, embarrassment creeping up his cheeks. A handler for new pets, the sort of job he had been hoping for.

"You have nothing to worry about. I can already tell that you're going to be such a good boy." They reached out their hand to pet Rayan's hair, and he didn't shy away from it. The gentle touch as they ruffled his hair felt... nice. Comforting. He was leaning into it before he could stop himself.

"Oh, do you like that?" Kay cooed. "Aww, such a good boy, yes you are."

The embarrassment in his face grew more intense as he accepted the petting. He did like it, and that meant... that meant he really must be a pet, didn't it? A person wouldn't enjoy being patted and soothed like this. Anyone would consider that deviant behavior for a person, but it was expected behavior for a pet. Desired, even. 

So it was true, wasn't it? His struggle to hold down a job, to live independently, to accomplish the things everyone else seemed to do with so little effort, it was all because he was a pet. This was really happening. His eyes grew watery and a tear slid down his cheek.

"Oh dear, oh dear. It's okay," said Kay, producing a tissue from their pocket and wiping at Rayan's eyes. "It's okay to be sad. We'll get you all fixed up."

"May I ask a question, please?" 

"Yes, dear."

"What are they going to tell my family?"

"Our staff is already preparing to deliver the message. They're trained in supporting families during this difficult time. They'll be in good hands, I promise. You won't need to worry about them."

"...All right." That was the best he could hope for, wasn't it?

"Here, let's get you your medication." Kay handed him the paper cup, which was three-quarters full of a thick red liquid that smelled like artificial cherries. "You'll need medication three times a day at the beginning of your treatment, and then we'll taper it off to a lower dose."

Rayan couldn't help but hesitate before drinking it. This must be the medicine that all pets took, the one that would erase his memories, his ability to read and write, all the things he learned as an adult. As a person.

But if he wasn't a person, then he shouldn't have those memories in the first place. The medicine would fix him, wouldn't it?

"Go on, drink it up. You need your medicine, dear."

He closed his eyes and drank. It was cloyingly sweet with a sickly aftertaste. 

"Very good!" Kay reached into the basket and pulled out a flimsy plastic collar with a printed label on it. "This is your temporary collar until you get a real one. You're number 25."

"Twenty-five..." he repeated in a daze. That's right. He wouldn't be "Rayan" any more, not ever again.

"You'll get a much better name when you're adopted," they said, clipping the collar around his neck. It felt cold as he ran his fingers along it. They pulled out a metallic cuff that locked around his wrist. "And this is so we don't lose you, dear."

"...Okay."

"There are only a few rules in the facility. You must not leave this room without permission. You must follow all of the instructions the handlers give you. You must not harm any handlers or any of the other pets. There will be punishments if you fail to follow the rules -- they're for your own good, and the good of the staff and the pets, of course."

"Right." 

They showed Rayan -- no, he was 25 now, wasn't he? -- a remote with one big round button on it. "If you need help, just press this button! But don't abuse it, or we'll have to take it away, do you understand?"

He nodded. "Uh -- uh-huh." It was getting hard to focus on what Kay was saying, even though he knew it was important. 

"Tomorrow we'll be giving you a medical evaluation and start the first steps of your treatment. You'll be -- and then we'll --"

25 rubbed at his eyes. His head felt foggy, and everything seemed so far away.

"Oh, dear." Kay's voice echoed through his mind. "That must be the medicine kicking in. Why don't you settle in for a nice nap, then? We can talk about these things in the morning."

He nodded. That sounded perfect.

"Just lay down on the bed and we'll get you all tucked in."

As 25 curled up onto the bed, Kay spread the warm and weighty blanket over him. patting his head again. "Good night, dear. Sleep well, and have pleasant dreams." They turned off the light and shut the door behind them with a click.

25 stared out into the darkness. So much had happened since he'd found 13. While he'd sometimes imagined what it would be like to be a pet, thoughts he never shared with anyone, he never seriously thought he'd be here in a facility. And now he'd never see his parents or his own apartment ever again. Despite how drowsy he was, there was no way he was getting to sleep, not with the anxious knot in his stomach.

But after a few minutes, he felt the anxiety start to dissolve away, leaving a sensation of dull calm. It must be the medicine, he figured, as his eyelids began to droop and his thoughts scatter.

He was feeling better already, just like they'd said. They really did know what was best for him.

[astradyke]

MY EXPERIENCE W/ TIT TOUR (tysons 2)

( written while looping I'm Not Okay (I Promise) by MCR, and also a car alarm going off outside my dorm room repeatedly :') )

NON-SPOILER SECTION:

SO many sweet people in line. someone gave us (me, my best friend, and my other beautiful friend) custom dan & phil stickers (pictured above), there was a lovely person in cat whiskers making sure people knew the difference between the gen admission & silver line, etc. phannies have the coolest fashion sense all the sick lovely lesbians were making me nervous... <3

s/o to my best friend's running capacity we were first in merch line!!! I am so endlessly happy with my photocard haul especially the uni hoodie one that one is my FAVORITE, also I love this long-sleeve so much. I almost got more merch but I held myself back and I think that was a good call! Also a super cool phannie made custom photocards and I got a silly dan one :D

y'all already saw but I met Clo @bitchslapblastoids who is the first mutual I have ever met in real life ever! between you and me... she is super kind and also really cool :]

our seats were so good!! balcony like row F or whatever but it worked out <3 our seatmate was also very kind!!!

pre-show people danced to HOT TO GO! and someone held up a Palestine flag and we all cheered! and people were moshing to von dutch which is so beautiful to me

SPOILER SECTION:

List of favorite jokes included: "Now our show passes the Bechdel test!" "I have kind of an aloof sociopath vibe going. ... which has worked for me :)" "[I am not satisfied on screen] What was that about? // I think I was just horny that day." "Scared of my life without you when I kill you!" "Dan had depression :D!!" "Enough about the gay, we've already done the gay// Enough about the depression, we've already talked about the depression."

No "sorry daddy, I mean father" line, which is devastating, BUT we didn't get the whole 'do you think Dan Howell' can commit schpiel with the wedding... much to think about

our conspiracies were pumpkin, faked sleepless night 3, bar, and wedding! i deeply wanted the other conspiracies i am so not going to lie but it's okay...

our "one minute" tangent was about electricity, clo made a post about this but they made a God and Adam joke because Phil tried to electrocute Dan and it failed so they were just awkwardly touching fingertips for a period of time

Nothing could have prepared me for the Phil on top of Dan choking him with the llama hat thing. Like i knew it was going to happen but still nothing could have prepared me. i think i fully grabbed my best friend's arm and shoulders and shook them a bit

our confessions and like nolemodel bit were really funny shout out DMV phannies!!!

Really made me sad when phil made the joke about babysitting like NO!!! YOUR CONTENT IS THE REASON I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT WHEN MY PARANOIA IS BAD!!!!!!!! I LOVE U HIATUS YR CONTENT PHIL!!!! But his whole thing about the hiatus being a good thing in the end because it brought us here... <333

every segment felt perfectly timed and the entire show was just so funny and good. Like ultimately i can yearn for having gotten different conspiracies or slightly different vibes but altogether it was incredible.

THE SONG WAS LIFE-CHANGING. I knew more about it thru spoilers than I had thought but either way not only was it so fucking good, like, I'm going to get I-D-G-A-F it saved me tattooed. I have decided this.

WRAP UP THOUGHTS:

I first got into Dan and Phil when I was 11/12-- my first video was post Daniel Howell rebrand, and it was Daniel and Depression, I'll give you three guesses as to why my friend at the time recommended that video. I was obviously a die-hard phan at the time, reading phic and watching the compilations and obsessed with their gaming videos. I remember being like, unfathomably depressed trying to do math homework in bed, and just 'secretely' watching their videos instead. I can remember exactly when the first WDAPTEO dropped, and like how much I wanted to go to interactive introverts but was too scared to (I think I'm glad I didn't go for personal reasons) but my friends did go. I remember I was leaving summer gym class before I started HS when Basically I'm Gay dropped, and watching it-- but I was 13 almost 14, closeted, and while it resonated with me it didn't really hit me that strongly? I remember being most taken aback by the confirmation of their relationship, and the conclusion Dan left about his own sexuality had an impact on me wrt rejecting the constraints of labels, but it didn't really hit me crazily. during hiatus years I watched solo AP semi often but so much was happening... obviously, when the hiatus returned, i came back full force. when it's summer and i can't sleep at night, I watch AP hiatus years solo content; I watched most of the Dystopia Dailys; I saw We're All Doomed's digital release w/ the same best friend I went to TIT with; and obviously, you all have seen me talk about their collaborative content. But after that time, maybe even a bit before the hiatus ended, I rewatched Basically I'm Gay. after all I went through in high school (nothing quite like his experiences, but aspects of it resonated through), that video hit me like a fucking truck-- it made me realize the inherent amount that my queer identity played in my trauma, and it like... made me really emotional lol. also, Phil's openness about his chronic illness has meant a lot especially as I battle with my own-- not chronic illness, but, physical health battles. So when they sang IDGAF it saved me, that was like fucking earth-shattering to me, because they did save me! from when i was 12 years old struggling to do work, wondering why i was so tired every day but at least having them to cheer me up-- to being 19 years old, joints aching and emotionally stressed, watching their pizza mukbang 2 and seeing how much happier they are, how much happier I am. they saved me. and i love them so, so fucking much.

On a very different note, seeing them live has colored my whole, uh, envisioning Dan Howell being trapped in my head in order to cope with my day to day mental isolation, issue, as being like... maybe not the move. so i'm trying to get more used to the quiet of my own head, but hey, over the years, they've helped a lot with that.

I wish i could have met them just to say all these things i'm realizing now, after seeing the show. but TLDR: TIT tysons 2 was the best night of my life. i love them, i love them, i love them, i love them, and i hope they know. i dunno how to move forward with my life after an experience like last night, just, God. i love you dan and phil. i love you phandom. it saved me. TIT saved me.

[mattstromboli]

Over You- M.S

Warnings: Angst, Crying

Summary: You’re a singer holding a showcase to release a new song. About your ex, Matt, who’s in the crowd listening to you sing about him.

HEAVILY BASED ON OVER YOU BY LANDON BARKER

Matt’s pov

it’s been two months since you and i have seen each other— and two months since the two of us have broken up. you're a singer, and i broke up with you the day before you left for your nationwide tour. tonight you’re preforming an unreleased song, many people came to this concert, and little do you know, that includes me, nick, and chris.

“i just don’t get why i had to come here, she’s—“ i start to complain, but im cut off by chris and nick pointing at the stage, as you begin to speak.

“WELCOME TO THIS SHOWCASE EVERYONE!”

nick and chris cheer at your introduction, while i remain quiet, but still clap. i sit in my seat, watching you intently as you begin to speak

“today is my official bonus show! ill be performing an unreleased song today, and after i sing it, it’ll be released on all streaming platforms!”

i sit up in my seat at your words, looking around me at the hundreds of people around me, i look back at the stage— watching you intently. i see you look over at me shocked, and sad.

”okay- this is gonna take a lot for me to sing, knowing that who i wrote this about is here to hear it. this is kinda my way of admitting to myself that im not over what happened. this song has so much meaning to me and i can’t wait to share it with you all.”

i feel my heart shatter as you mention me, looking over at nick and chris, i see them eyeing me expectingly, while people around me murmur and talk about the song being about me. i remain silent and avoid eye contact, i continue to sit silently as people around me murmur about you noticing me, meanwhile, nick and chris nudge each other and look back at me expectantly

i sit there, listening intently as you talk about the song that you are about to sing, i get butterflies in my stomach, but also a sense of dread, i know that this song is about me, and im not ready to hear what you say

“okay. here we go.”

“I can't get out of my bed, your voice inside of my head

Our favorite song on repeat

I try my best to forget all of the words that you said

Act like it's nothing to me

This happens every time I wish that I could rewind

And end things differently

But, can't bring myself to move on

I miss you now that you're gone

I feel it terminally

Yeah, 'cause I can't help myself

But I'll get over you

Baby, over my dead body

There's nothing I can do

'Cause you were never just somebody

I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go

You leave me broken, black and blue

But I'll get over you

Baby, over my dead body

You're still inside of my blood, I won't be done 'til I'm done

I feel you run through my veins

If I've got air in my lungs, baby, then you're still the one

Nothing comes close to the same

Oh, I still can't help myself

But I'll get over you

Baby, over my dead body

There's nothing I can do

'Cause you were never just somebody

I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go

You leave me broken, black and blue

But I'll get over you

Baby, over my dead body

I can't understand it

I'm turning all the damage into madness over you

Oh, baby, I can't stand it

Feel like nothing worse could happen

And I know it's tragic, but not as bad as losing you

But I'll get over you

Baby, over my dead body

There's nothing I can do

'Cause you were never just somebody

I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go

You leave me broken, black and blue

But I'll get over you

If it's the last thing I do.”

my heart breaks further as the words of the song wash over me like a ton of bricks, i listen intently to each word, every single line of the song seems as though it perfectly describes exactly how i’m feeling. every single word of the song perfectly captures the way that i’ve felt these past few months. nick and chris look back at me, expecting some sort of reaction. i see a single tear stream down your face as the song ends and i feel a pit in my gut.

the room is nearly dead silent for a few seconds, before the room erupts in applause, meanwhile, i sit there, shell-shocked. how did you manage to describe exactly how ive been feeling these past few months? I see you erupt into tears as you walk off the stage and my body finally allows me to slowly clap, feeling dead inside.

nick and chris look at each other before looking back at me, i remain silent and just sit in my seat, too stunned to move

Your pov

as i sit backstage crying and listening to ‘over you’ on repeat, i feel my heart shatter piece by piece, knowing that matt was there to witness my song, and my breakdown over him. i watch the outside cameras as matt walks away from the venue with his head down

In a spur of the moment decision, i dial up matt’s number and hit call. the call answers and i can’t bring myself to speak. sobs wrack my body, but no words come out.

“y-y/n?”

“i-i meant it! i meant what i said. im not over you. you weren’t ever just ‘somebody’. please.”

“and i’ll get over you if it’s the last thing i do.”

———————————- THE END

taglist: @sassysturniolo2008 @wompwomp-1 @anna-sturniolo

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[mrs-santoss]

You're Here - Neymar Imagine

Summary:

Hii, so I was wondering if you could do a fanfic about us (Y/n) not being able to attend the world cup and Ney being kinda upset about it, but then we (Y/n) surprise him just before his game?

Neymar's POV: I was at the hotel eating breakfast with the team and I decided to text my girlfriend a good morning text to see if she's woken up yet. I text her good morning and place my phone on the table and continue to eat. After 10 minutes or so, I get a call from Y/N. "Hii, meu amor. Good morning. Did you sleep well?" she says excitedly as soon as I answer the phone. "Hii, bebê. Good morning to you too. Yes, I did. How about you? Do you miss me?" I ask her back and I excuse myself to the lobby and sit on a comfortable chair. "Yes, Ney, of course. I miss you everyday, bebê." she says this in a sad tone making me worried. "What is it, amor? Why do you sound sad?"

"I don't think I can make it to your game, amor. I tried my best to convince my boss, however, he didn't even want to hear me out." she says this almost in a verge of crying.

I have to admit, I feel pretty upset about this. She was supposed to travel here 2 weeks after me and stay with me hopefully until I win this World Cup. I know she feels sad about this too. She is my number one fan and supports me on every single thing. "I have to admit I feel pretty upset about this, bebê. But, I know it's not your fault, so please don't cry about this. You can support me from there too. I know it's not the same as being here, but I know you're always watching me no matter what." I say this trying to make her feel better about the situation. "I'm so sorry, Ney. I love you much, meu amor. Please don't be mad at me." she says back in a small voice. "Of course not, bebê. I love you too." I tell her and I hear the coach ordering us to get on the bus. " Y/N, I have to leave. The coach wants us to get on the bus, I will talk to you as soon as I can, amor. I love you." I say to her and she says i love you back and we end the call. Great. Just great. I was really looking forward to having her here, but I guess it wasn't meant to be. _________________________________________ We get on the field to start the game. I'm pretty nervous but still calm at the same time, I didn't even know it was possible to feel like this. I do warm ups with Dani and we chat about small things unrelated to the game so we can ease our nerves a little bit. I take a look at the fans in the stadium and appreciate the view. I love this about Brazil. People are very enthusiastic about football. I wish Y/N was here to experience this.

It's like my wish came true in that second, because as soon as I look over at the VIP section I can see Y/N waving at me and yelling my name like crazy. I blink a few times making sure I'm not dreaming. I smile back at her and run near the stadium chairs. "YOU MADE IT" I yell at her and she makes her way down to me. As soon as she gets close, I grab her and spin her around. I stop and kiss her passionately. "Of course, I would. I wanted to surprise you. I was at the airport when we had our last conversation on the phone a few hours ago." she says back proud of her surprise. Everyone is cheering and taking photos of us. "Oh, really? So, this is how we're playing now?" I ask her back playfully. "Hmm, I guess so." she says back and kisses my cheek. I hear the guys yelling for me to join them. "I have to go, bebê. Wish me luck. I'm so so so fucking happy you're here." I give her a quick kiss and run to the guys. "You won't need it bebeeee. I love youuu!!" she yells at me while making her way up to her seat. "I love you tooo."

[jumexju]

LULLABY

Fic Type !! : angst

CW !! : Gojo fucken dies (thanks a lot gege)

Summary !! : He lied. He didn't come back like he said he would.

Note !! : Yes i'm bitter idc gege needs to apologize for makin me go thru this, this was originally gon be a fluff fic but I just read 237 for myself and well, here we are

✦ MASTERLIST

OPENING YOUR eyes, you could see his eyes. Bluer than the sea itself, not even the beaches in Okinawa could compare to the beauty his eyes held. And his hair, oh his hair. Softer than the clouds and whiter than the snow. The way his lips were always plush against yours.. How his rough, calloused hands would often cup your cheeks as he kissed your forehead.. He was simply more perfect than perfect was.

"Ya miss me?" He snickered as his strong arms wrapped around you, engulfing you completely in his affection. You immediately hugged him back. With your face buried in his shirt, you could almost smell the detergent you often used when doing laundry.

The softness of the fabric was like no other, you weren't sure if it was because of the fabric itself or because it was Satoru clothed in it. Despite his rigid build, he was always a source of comfort for you, he was always soft to you.

"F'course, there's not a single day I don't miss you." Your words were quiet ー and a little muffled since you were still tightly pressed against him. He pulls away a little, trying to get a better look at you.

"Hey.. you know i'd never leave you." He tries to reassure you as he takes one of his hands off your waist and raises it to cup your cheek. His thumb brushing against your skin.

"..." You didn't say anything back but your grip on his shirt tightened. You rested your forehead against his chest, "You're a bad liar."

At this, he chuckled, bringing you back in for a hug. "You're just an illusion made by my brain to cope with what happened.." You continued. "You're not really here.." Hot tears welled up in your eyes, you could feel them roll down your cheek as you slept, still not daring to let it wake you up.

"That may be true." He spoke, leaning down a little to kiss your forehead reassuringly, "..Maybe in some alternate universe, I'm still here, with you." He smiled.

".. That doesn't help, Satoru," You chuckled sadly as he wiped your tears with his thumb.

"Made ya laugh though didn't I? That's gotta count for somethin'!" He declared cheerfully.

"You always knew how to cheer me up.." Your voice faltered, lips quivering. He pulled you in again, trying to comfort you. You wanted so badly for this to be real. You wanted to wake up next to him, tell him you loved him and see his toothy smile as he told you that you couldn't possibly love him more than he loved you.

"I miss you.." Your body shook as you cried into his shirt, his arms keeping you close.

"I know."

Your eyes burst open, vision cloudy from the tears you'd been crying in your sleep. The covers surrounding you shifted as you sat up, wiping your tears, you felt empty. The heavy feeling of sorrow had become familiar. Grief had made a home in your heart since seeing the horrific sight of Satoru's lifeless body.

It felt like some sick and twisted dream.

At first, you'd been angry. Angry that Sukuna had managed to end the life of the one you loved so much. Angry that no one else stepped in to help, even if you knew logically that they would've only hindered him. Angry that.. you weren't there to see him in his final moments.

Then you were sad. Sad that you would never hear him rant about how the higher-ups were always on his ass. Sad that you wouldn't be able to see the boyish smile he wore so often around you. Sad that you'd never see the loving glint in his eyes whenever he looked at you.

But now.. you were empty.

As empty as his side of the bed now that he was gone. Emptier than the bottomless pit that sat in your stomach, it was unbearable. The weight of his death crushed your heart.

It was uncanny.

To realize that you would never wake up next to him again. You would never get to bicker with him over his unhealthy addiction to sweets. You would never feel his soft lips on yours again. The softness of his hair would never kiss the tips of your fingers.. his warmth would never again be close to you & his eyes would forever remain soulless, never again gazing at you lovingly like he used to.

You didn't have Satoru to comfort you anymore. The spot beside you would always be cold. He wasn't coming back.

Sobs racked your body as you began to cry for the nth time this week and in an attempt to soothe yourself, your encased yourself in your own arms. Your breaths were uneven, your eyes hurt from the endless stream of tears that flowed. Your pained wails ricocheted off the walls of your room.

You were alone.

Totally and undeniably Alone.

[loving-strawberry]

✶(Reversed)Breaking up prank goes wrong with Stray Kids✶(Maknae-Line)

Hyung-Line Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the other post on my blog!

Summary: You take your boyfriend prank seriously.

It was a request!

A little note: I finally manage to post this one too! I didn't mean to postpone it, but it was necessary. ;^^ Anyway, enjoy reading it! And I also kinda threw Felix under the bus on most of the parts...

Genre: Angst, Fluff. (2 Happy endings, 2 sad endings)

Pairing: Bf!Skz x gn!reader

Warning: lot of swearing, insults, actual break up, mention of cheating and hickeys and bruises(fake ones), mention of being a burden, talking about body insecurities and not being good enough, talking about hate comments, mention of falling out of love, mention of throwing up. Possibly some writing mistakes. I really hope I didn't missed any tw!

Han Jisung☆

He went for this prank when it was the hardest for you and you needed him

And he took the prank on another level

That was it for your relationship

Your boyfriend's behavior was super strange all day today, that making you worried like crazy, on top of everything else you were dealing with, and being pretty unstable emotionally.

You finally got to confront Han about his distance he kept constantly all day long, which is uncharacteristically to this 24/7 clingy man of a boyfriend. And he's literally the biggest support and help you can ask for in every moment of your life. But not today for some reason, when it was one of those days you were feeling drained the most.

Your thoughts were interrupted when you hear a knock on the front door of your house. Taking a deep breath, you reach to your door and opened it, allowing your boyfriend to enter. As he enters, you start feeling sick to your stomach, because he looks and acts nothing like his usual self.

He is usually all smiling and cheerful with all of the occasions he gets seeing you, all the time giving you the biggest and warmest hugs you could possibly ask for, and peppering your face with tons of kisses. Telling you how much he loves you. But right now, he has a cold look on his face, and he says nothing but a small hi, and not even the slightest touches. He just enters your house like he's a total stranger.

"H-Han... My love... What is wrong...? You were all day like this." even if you didn't saw each other, his texts responses were as cold, which caused you anxiety all day.

Sighing, he takes a look at you, before speaking "I'm going to be as quickly as possible. I want to break up with you. I'm not in love with you anymore..." this sends shivers down your spine and your heart drops.

"What...?" your face is drained from every color you had at first, as you are trying your best not to throw up everything you've eaten that day. Every thought possible is crossing your mind now, tears trickling from the corner of your eyes, and you slowly came to the realization "Was I too much of a burden to you, that's why you don't love me anymore, wasn't it? I'm sorry... I knew I should've keep everything to myself. Maybe that way you still loved me..."

If Han didn't regret the prank yet, he does it now. He knows very well about how you feel and how low you can be sometimes but he didn't knew today was one of those day where you needed him and his love the most, not to be met with coldness and distance.

"Oh my god... I'm so sorry... If I knew you were feeling like this, I will not be pulling this prank on you-" he approaches you and take you in his arms, trying to get you to calm down. And you did calmed down, but not because of his hug. More likely because you just shut down completely.

"Playing games with someone's feelings I see. Only if it wasn't in this moment of my life. Maybe then I would've find it funny and laughed." now you are the cold one, pushing him away from you.

"I don't know why exactly I wanted to do the prank... I thought it was going to be funny... I didn't meant to make you feel like this... Is there anything I can do to make up for it?" he's saying it with hope in his eyes, hoping you will forgive his dumb ass and give him another chance. You scoff hearing his words.

"'I thought it was going to be funny'. For who? And yeah. There is something you can do. Get the fuck away from me. I don't want to see you again." you spit every word with so much venom, that if your words were able to kill, he will be dead by now.

Han wants to continue on pleading for forgiveness and asking for another chance. He wants to do better for you again, like he did in the past. But he cannot do it anymore. His words are stuck in his throat. He's too shocked to say anything. Shocked by his own actions. Why did he choose to hurt you like this for fun? This got him sick now. He knows that you are going to do better without him. He always knew that you needed someone better than him. Because even if he knows how hard it is to be emotionally unstable, he still pulled such a prank on you. And not just in a simple, direct way. He went straight up giving you cold shoulder all day long before going to the subject itself. He's no good for you. So he doesn't even try to apologize anymore.

He take one more look at you and his heart broke in an instant when he sees the emotionless eyes before him, which usually are filled with love as they are watching him, but not today. Not anymore. Never again.

Han finally take his leave with that. He regrets everything now. He regrets even thinking about the prank in the first place. He just hopes you will get better soon and move on from him. Allowing yourself to be happy. Allowing yourself to love someone who won't hurt you intentionally with a reckless prank.

Lee Felix☆

Felix sees, Felix does...

Can someone take tik tok away from his hands?

Of course he sees the prank and tries to do it.

Who would think that he, from all of the people, will do it, literally the sunshine

But the sunshine won't shine anymore after this

Seeing this prank all over his tik tok, he is starting to consider doing it on you, just of pure curiosity to see how will you react. He is thinking optimistically and imagining you will recognize it's just a prank and laugh it off.

As he's debating on how to bring this up to you, you just then arrive home, extremely angry and mad because of your work. He doesn't see that you are feeling unwell, as you are usually pretty good at staying calm around other people and smiling like there's nothing going on, which is a bad habit of yours.

"Hey, Lixie." you smile, already feeling much calmer. But your calm state is instantly replaced by an unsettling feeling, as you your boyfriend being all serious and having two fingers on his neck, checking his pulse, being a bit nervous about this prank. "Something bothering you?"

"I... I'm breaking up with you" he avoid looking in your direction and doesn't give you any reason for this sudden action. That's when you come up with the realization that it is one of those tik tok pranks. You already being angry, this just adds more fuel.

"Is there any exact reason for it?" you start questioning Felix, entering his extremely dumb joke.

"W-Well... I-...Um..." he didn't think this through, he doesn't have any reason for breaking up with you. You are literally perfect for him.

"Next time think twice before pulling a hurtful prank." you go in the bedroom and start packing up some of your things, Felix not so far behind you, as he now sees that you were actually in a bad mood and did not want to put up with something like this.

"I just wanted to see how you will react to this prank... I'm sorry... I won't do it again. Please, don't leave me... Please-" he starts pleading for you to stay, but to no avail. You continue packing up the essentials in your bags, before heading towards the front door, in complete silence. This sets Felix into total panic mode. He runs after you and grabs you by the shoulders, spinning you around for you to face him again. "I'm really sorry... Please..."

"No, Yongbok. You fucked up real good with your pranks this time. Oh, and you wanted to see my reaction, right? Well congratulations, you have it. Hope you will enjoy being alone from now on. Goodbye." you snap at him, all of the anger stuck in you all day long finally leaving your body. "I'll send someone to grab the rest of my stuffs in a few days." and with that, you move from his grasps and go out the door, leaving what was your house as well until a second ago.

Felix can't do anything anymore, completely frozen in place. As soon as realization slowly kicks in, he starts sobbing. Falling to his knees as his own legs gave up on him. And his heart aching in so much pain, that it could actually stop any second now.

He doesn't even know what he was expecting at first when he decided to give this prank a go. But he surely didn't expect this. He truly didn't want to hurt you in any way. Felix really thought that you will see it as a silly joke, like you always did with every other pranks. He didn't expect you to react this way, but now that he's thinking about it, you had every right to do so.

He played a game he didn't know it was dangerous and he got you hurt. He should've think the consequences through. Not to think this optimistically about a joke that could potentially hurt a person's feelings.

He fucked up and you have every right to go somewhere better. Somewhere where he couldn't hurt you anymore.

Kim Seungmin☆

He does not want to do this prank at all

But after you came with another prank and he knew it was a prank, he gave it a shot

This relationship is plant based on constant jokes and stupid pranks...

Everyone questioning how you are still together...

Your dearest best friend, Felix, shared you a link to an unharmful prank, the hickey one. And you immediately wanted to put it in practice, being the fact the your amazing ass boyfriend last week replaced your favorite lipstick with glue. The most common prank, but you still somehow fell for it. After being stuck with your lips sealed together for a good 30 minutes a few days ago, you swore to get revenge. This opportunity is perfect. And the perfect timing indeed, because in one hour you were supposed to meet with Seungmin for a date. So you start preparing everything.

After securing the fake hickey in place on your neck with some setting spray and making sure it's not going to smudge easily, you start heading towards your meeting place.

Seungmin was already waiting for you, as you arrived. "Took you long enough." he says teasingly, before hugging you.

"I was late 5 minutes, pup." you kiss his cheek, before heading towards the actual you needed to be. As you two are walking, you make sure to move your hair away from your neck, so the hickey could be seen.

Seungmin spots short after that the bruise on your skin, and he can feel his stomach drop. Stopping both of you from your track, he takes a look at your neck. "What is this?"

"Hm? I burned my skin accidentally with my hair straightener." you say it so innocently, trying to look convincing that you actually cheat on him.

"Hair straightener my ass, you whore!" he gets extremely angry now. "If you think I'm falling for this excuse of yours, you are totally wrong."

You try to say something, to fix this situation, but nothing comes out of your mouth. Too shocked of how your boyfriend got this angry over a prank. You really thought it was going be a small innocent prank, but you are terrible mistaken.

"We are done. Go to whoever left this mark on your neck." turning around, he takes his leave. And you can't do more than just to stand there, all confused and hurt for a good second. Before coming back to your senses and go after him.

"Seungmin! Wait! Please! Let me explain!" you try your best not to break down sobbing, feeling super guilty for hurting your boyfriend like this. To your surprise, Seungmin stops and turns to face you again, rising one eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. "It's a prank... It's just makeup...Please... I'm sorry..."

"I know." he says smirking. "I was just returning your little joke."

You look at him in shock and tears streaming down your face, glad that it was nothing but a prank, but mad at him for scaring you like this. "You scared me so bad! I thought I lost you!"

"You scared me as well for a second when I saw that mark at first. But I know you and I know that you won't do such thing." taking a napkin from his pocket and wiping away the makeup from your neck, he then hugs you to his chest, letting you crying everything out.

"Let's keep on doing little pranks that won't hurt us next time. Ok, my love?" he continues rubbing your back in circles motion, trying to calm you down.

"Yeah... This was too scary..." you manage to calm down and look at Seungmin, giving him a small smile.

He mirrors your expression, having the sweetest smile, the one that is meant just for you to see, the one that is melting your heart everytime. "I love you, dumbass."

"I love you too, Minnie."

Yang Jeongin☆

After this prank, he swears he won't listen to his Hyungs ever again, especially Felix and Lee Know

Felix mentioned randomly the prank, and Lee Know came with the suggestion of I.N to do it with you

And poor Innie just went with it and ended up regretting it.

You have felt insecured about your body. Most likely because of the hate comments you get from Jeongin's "fans" on a daily basis, after your relationship got public. People got jealous and starting hating on you. All of the comments about your body. How you should lose some weight. Or how you aren't beautiful enough for Jeongin, got you pretty fast. And now your mind is in a constant spiral. Are you really good enough for him? Does he really loves you? Will he soon see how ugly actually you are and start being disgusted by you?Will he ever stop loving you?

But to your absolute horror, he payed you an unexpected visit, and starts confirming your biggest fears.

You are just standing now in the living room, looking at your boyfriend, while he starts talking "I think we should break up... I fall out of love with you..."

Every color you had in your face until this point, totally drained and gone now. "It is because of how I look... Right? I wasn't enough for you from the start. Your fans were right... " right now, you are incapable of showing any emotions anymore, feeling numb.

Your boyfriend hates himself now for doing this. He knew he shouldn't listened to his older members from the start, but still ended up doing so. And now everything is aching with guilt and regret. "It was a stupid prank... Felix hyung and Lee Know hyung told me to try it. I'm really sorry for doing it. I was way too stupid and accepted it."

"No... It's ok... I wouldn't blame you if you were going to actually do it. You are way too perfect looking to be seen with someone like me. I don't deserve you." the words that came out of your mouth made Jeongin rush over to you and embrace you in the warmest hug he could ever give. Which is rare for him to initiate physical touch.

"Never say that again! Don't ever listen to anyone who is saying this towards you. You are gorgeous. People are just jealous of your beauty. Beside, you are also the kindest person I know, and the sweetest." you end up crying in his arms, feeling so safe and loved with him. "I'll be with you. Forever. I won't leave you. I love you so much, my beautiful angel."

"I love you too... Thank you... for not actually leaving me."

He smiles softly, as he place a few kisses on top of your head. He's not planning on leaving your side ever, not even as a joke. You are his everything. And will make sure to let anyone who made think so low about yourself know that you are loved by him, doesn't matter how you look.

.............................

✧ Masterlist ✧

✧ Tag List ✧

@bangchansbae @tattywood @nebulousbrainsoup @https-skzology @sp00ky-spr1te

[leysalyn]

🫧You went to the beach 🫧

🫧𓇼𓏲*ੈ✩‧₊˚🎐𓆉⋆｡˚⋆❀ 🐚🫧𓇼 ˖°*ੈ𓇼𓏲🫧

character :Satoru, Nanami, Choso, Geto

fem!reader

relationship :couple/married

Satoru Gojo

When you arrived at the beach, the first thing he did was take your hand and run closer to the sea and throw you there.

He laughed when he saw your sullen face and then immediately jumped into the sea next to you, once again causing water to splash onto you.

"Sorry, baby. You're just so funny and cute when you're angry." Satoru said and laughed

And all day you fooled around, ran around the sea, mocked and seduced each other.

When the sun began to set, Satoru became a little sad

"mmh...damn. I've waited so long to finally spend time with you, and already the day is ending... I hate it." He pouted like a little boy and crossed his arms

You giggled at his childishness and hugged him.

“Don’t worry, we’ll still have time to have fun at home and on the beach and anywhere else.”

Nanami Kento

The two of you lay on a lounge chair while your 4-year-old daughter ran in the sand and collected shells.

Nanami read a book and sometimes sipped wine, but that doesn’t change the fact that he didn’t keep an eye on his daughter and you sometimes.

Nanami looked at you and sighed. Then he took the hat and put it on your head.

"Sunny, you better take care of yourself, otherwise you might get a sunstroke while lying under the sun." He smiled faintly and kissed her on the cheek

"Okay, I'm just falling asleep a little." You muttered and rubbed your eyes.

“Then maybe it’s better if you lie down next to a tree? There’s just shade there, and you’ll feel better.”

You smiled and shook your head. “No need. I’ll figure it out myself somehow.”

Nanami rolled his eyes and continued reading the book. And a few minutes later your daughter ran up to you with shells

"Mom! Dad! Look what I managed to find here!"

Choso Kamo

He was lying on a sun lounger and looked very tired.

It was you who initiated the trip to the beach, because you were tired of seeing your boyfriend constantly working and not having much time to rest.

"God...baby, can you get me something to drink?" Choso groaned from the fatigue in his body

You nodded and went to find the cold drink counter. And a few minutes later you returned with a drink and gave it to him.

"Mmh...thanks, baby." He smiled at you and started drinking water

You smiled and lay down next to him and rested your head on his chest. Choso placed his hand on your head and stroked it gently.

"maybe we can go swimming?" You looked at him and smiled. Choso thought for a moment and nodded.

"Why not?" He got up from the sun lounger, took you by the hand and you went to the sea, where you started swimming and having fun

Geto Suguru

The two of you lay peacefully under the sun and sunbathed a little and even talked about different topics.

But a couple of minutes after your daughter went into the sea to swim, she came running to you in tears.

"Mom, dad! Something touched my leg in the sea!" Your 5 year old daughter said as she sat on your lap and nuzzled into your chest. Her body was shaking a little from tears and fear.

Geto sighed “Honey, look after your daughter, I’ll go check what’s there.” And after these words he went to the sea

You looked at your daughter and started stroking her head and trying to cheer her up. After a while she calmed down a little and wiped away her tears.

"Are you feeling better, honey?"You asked her, your daughter nodded and hugged your neck.

A few minutes later, Geto returned to you. "As it turned out, it was just algae, honey" Geto laughed and sat down next to you.

"Algae?" Your daughter looked at him and became a little embarrassed.

[itjazzbicch]

Helping Heal

Pairing:  Takashi MItsuya x Reader 

Summary: (MANGA SPOILERS SO IF YOU DONT WANT THOSE DON'T CONTINUE)

After Draken is shot and dies of his injuries, Takashi is in a deep depression, locking himself in his room, and the reader, being a close friend, goes to see that he was actually doing something in his room, and comes to help him during this hard time...

Warnings:  Manga spoilers, slight eating disorder? (Mitsuya hadn't eaten because he was sad :'( figured I'd make that a warning, but this ends happily I promise)

Word Count: 1k 

"Hey, Mitsuya?" I called out softly, knocking on his door softly.

He's been working on his design for the fashion show ever since Draken died. He hasn't left his room according to his siblings Luna and Mana.

Worried wasn't even a good enough word to describe how I felt about him right now. I dropped past his house to check on him, Luna and Mana explained that he had come out of his room for a change, and they were worried because he hasn't eaten anything in a few days.

Before coming back to his room, I went and grabbed him some of his favorite food from his favorite restaurant. Hoping he'd answer the door.

The door creaked softly, his back already turned, but allowing me as he returned to his seat on his bed.

"All done, huh?" I tried to smile, looking to see that he had his work covered up.

"Yeah," He mumbled, not even looking at me.

This was worse than I thought. He was always so lively with me, now it was like he was dead inside.

"Luna and Mana told me you haven't left your room and you haven't been eating," I said softly, shutting the door and coming over with the food I brought him, "So, I went and got your favorite."

"Thanks," Not moving a muscle, this was so hard to watch, but I still set up his food and drink for him on a small fold table he had.

"Cheers?" Holding up my drink, I was hoping I could get him to at least pick something up.

Instead, he stared at me through his bangs before looking down to the floor. I was running out of ideas and so, I sat next to him, hugging him tight whether he wanted a hug or not.

"Just let it out, Takashi," I whispered, fighting tears of my own, "I know you're hurting more than anyone right now. I'm here for you."

Clinging to my jacket, the veins in his hand were popping out from gripping so tight, sniffling before completely breaking down with his face buried in my chest. Hugging him as tightly as I could, I started crying too when he muffled out through tears and a cracking voice:

"I-I; I just can't believe he's g-gone."

"I know," I swallowed, rubbing his back and trying to keep myself together and help him, "But he still lives in here."

Holding my hand over his chest, hoping my words explained themselves, relieved when he nodded and hugged me again, settling down and taking deep breaths, closing his eyes as I cleaned his face with a soft napkin.

"Thank you," He whispered, sitting up and wiping at his eyes while I leaned to him, kissing his temple:

"I always have your back, Takashi. Always."

That made him smile some and it lifted some weight off my shoulders, growing lighter when he pulled the table closer, looking at his food:

"My favorite, hm?"

"Down to the very spices," I smiled at him, relieved as he took a bite, needing it literally for his health, and his soul, showing how much he enjoyed every bite with little expressions on his face.

I only brought myself a snack, but ate alongside him, eyes following his hand as they got his drink:

"I apologize for earlier. Cheers?"

"Oh, you're fine," I assured, taking mine and clanking our glasses softly, "Cheers."

Smiling and taking a sip, we finished up and I decided to clean up while he took a shower and checked on his sisters. Being extra careful, I made sure to put back all his tools away in their labeled spot, as neat as ever, and had his room clean.

All that was left was his final project which was on covered mannequins. I was curious to see, but also wanted to respect the fact that this was Takashi's masterpiece pretty much.

Just staring and zoning out, I jumped at the sound of the door creaking, seeing Takashi coming back in, noticing that I was wanting to see his latest pieces.

"Soon, Y/N. You'll get it see it soon," He winked at me, making me giggle and nod:

"I can't wait. I know you're going to win that whole show."

"Maybe," He hummed, sitting on the floor next to his bed with his brush in hand.

"No maybe's," I rebutted, sitting on the bed above him, stealing his brush and softly brushing through his ends, then through his hair in sections, "You better win or I'm fighting the judges."

Shaking his head and laughing at my comment, he was serious when he explained, "I don't really care if I win or not. I just want to honor him and his memory, our memories. That's all."

Knowing he meant Draken, that made me even more excited. He spent all that time locked in his room, working on a piece to honor him. It made me smile, running a hand through his hair and massaging his scalp, smiling at the dragon tattoo he and Draken had:

"He's gonna be watching, I'm sure, and he'll love it."

Hugging his head and kissing it again, I just wanted to keep all the bad emotions away from him, falling to silence when he tilted his head back to look at me.

His purple eyes glimmered from the light above us, just staring deeply into each other's eyes for a moment, till he tilt his head back a little further, lips perking to find mine.

All my breath left me, lips so soft, but making our kiss so deep, feeling all the appreciation from him, and something else, finding out what it was whenever he parted lips to whisper to me:

"I love you, Y/N."

Staying silent and still, he had to pick up his head and turn to me, arms latching him into a hug when he faced me, on his knees and hugging back with a sway, adding:

"I just wanted you to know that."

"I love you too, Takashi," I squeezed, picking my head up to give another kiss, "You have no idea." 

2023 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome 

[unique-high]

Sunscreen | Mingi x Blk Fem Reader

a/n: wrote this for myself cause I'm a little sad and in my feelings. I discovered this lovely song on Spotify called sunscreen and fell in love with it. lyrics are worked into the fic. sorry for any mistakes.

With every break-up, it always seemed like it was your fault. Your recent breakup had been no different from the rest. You felt numb when it suddenly ended. You thought of every single thing that could make your ex look like a bad person in your eyes, but he wasn't a bad person at all.

But you needed him to be.

When people ask you why it ended, you'd shrug, saying, "I don't know." because you really didn't know.

One minute he was here talking about marriage and how he would cry when you walked down the aisle. And the next he's storming through your apartment collecting his things, shoving them into his duffle bag, saying how he couldn't do this anymore. All you could do was cry and beg him not to go. He still left.

Now it's 2 am. You're in your bathroom listening to Erykah Badu while drinking warm red wine from a paper cup. You stare at your hair clippers, turning them on and then cutting your hair. It was freeing in a way you always did this after every breakup. Making you feel less light, but that numbness will still linger for about two more weeks, maybe even months.

So you move through your life without ever really thinking of your ex until something suddenly reminds you of him all over again. Like how when you hear his favorite song that you two would sing while drunk late into the night or when you run into some of his friends and you try your hardest not to ask them how he is doing.

These days were always a little harder.

After when you thought it was okay to actually move on, you get dressed up. Put on your favorite red lipstick and your favorite perfume.

The singles mixer was at a karaoke bar. You signed your name getting a sticker that read: ‘Hello, I'm Y/n’.

You smooth the sticker on to your black Chanel blouse while you order a drink. There were some people already up on stage singing some Taylor Swift song that you heard one time at the grocery store. Cruel summer.

Once you had your drink, you sit back watching everyone as they talk. Remember, you came here to have fun, and meet someone new.

From across the room, you see a guy walk in. He's awkwardly smiling, greeting anyone who walks by him. He slaps on his sticker and you squint your eyes in the dimly lit karaoke room to see his name tag. But all you could make out was ‘Min’

He slid down beside you. You pretend not to notice him. He leans towards you spooking you.

“Y/n's a cute name.” He says with a smile.

With the brim of your glass to your lips, you mutter, “Thank you.”

You glanced at his name sticker. ‘Hello, I'm Mingi.’

The host of the mixer came around encouraging those who were just sitting to get up and have fun. Mingi holds a mic for you. You stare at it before shaking your head.

“I can't really sing.” You say.

“Karaoke is not about how good you can sing. It's about having fun. Sing with me, please?”

So you take the mic. Go up on stage with Mingi. The song Mingi picked was The Black Eyed Peas My Humps. Mingi sings and dances on stage. Everyone was cheering him on. He grabs your hand getting you to dance a little. You're hesitant to sing at first but you sing having fun, but when Mingi twerks, you burst into laughter midway through the song.

You just met the guy and you couldn't help but imagine yourself with him. And it felt nice.

I want someone to remind me to wear sunscreen. And take my vitamins when it slips my mind.

You could imagine Mingi peeking his head out of your bathroom, toothbrush in his mouth as he reminds you to not forget to put on sunscreen and to take your vitamins as you're rushing about the kitchen trying to grab your tea mug, keys, and bag so you could head the door.

I want someone who knows how I like my coffee and wants to share a bed from morning to night.

Then you couldn't help but imagine him in your kitchen early in the morning, with messy brown hair and shirtless. He would know how you liked your coffee in the mornings. It would take him a week to get it right and when he does, it's worth seeing your smile and telling him he tastes like heaven. Then Saturdays would be your favorite again. Mingi would want to sleep in with you on his days off. And on the days he comes to your place late after work, sharing your bed at night with you would become his favorite thing.

“I would like to get to know you more,” Mingi says as the two of you walk off the stage. At first, you didn't know what to say, too scared that if Mingi eventually knew the real you, he'll be gone too.

But I'm stubborn. Selfish. Easily Jealous at times.

It's hard being you. Now you start to see why things never worked out with anyone else. You were just being yourself. What's a relationship when you couldn't be your true self? So what if you're stubborn? You've been that way since you were five. Selfish. Because you're the eldest daughter who had to be a parent to your younger siblings when your mother didn't feel like being a mother. Being easily Jealous comes from the time in 11th grade when your ex-best friend was far prettier than you, and got all the boys. These things made you into who you were.

I'm hard to love and I just want someone to try.

Of course, you weren't the easiest person on earth to love. But you think that came from your father. You tried your best to make your love easy, to make it comfortable for others to want to lean into. It was the opposite, though. At the end of the day, all you wanted was someone who would try. That's all you ask for.

You let Mingi in a little that night at the mixer. What could it hurt? The worst that could happen is you're crying into your pillow a couple months from now because he breaks up with you.

Ending up in your bed naked by the end of the night with Mingi wasn't supposed to happen, but it did. You'll regret it in the morning when he sneaks out while you're still asleep. So right now, while he's sleeping, you stare at him, counting how many breaths he takes.

By morning, you're a little groggy. You didn't expect to be pulled into Mingi's naked body. He's still here.

I want someone who knows that I'm not made for mornings and doesn't scold me for smoking when I drink.

Mingi doesn't try to pull you out of bed with the talk of breakfast and getting your day started early. Mornings weren't meant for you. And he somehow knew that. By the afternoon, Mingi is still at your place. He's wearing a pair of your sweat pants that go above his ankles. You make lunch for the two of you. Sometimes you like having a smoke during this time of day with a drink. Mingi isn't bothered by it. He doesn't try to scold you telling you how bad for your health it is. He doesn't know you to tell you what's good or bad for you. You liked that, though.

I want someone who can ground me when I'm too high. Light up the dark side of my head.

There were days when you floated on the surface of your mind, not really here, you functioned like you were on autopilot most days. It's been two weeks now. You knew Mingi's last name and all his favorite things. He spends nights at your place on the weekends. He noticed you weren't being yourself, he'd stroke your back, speaking to you softly. Sometimes being in your head all the time makes you depressed. Because you would find your ex still lingering there. Mingi sits and listens to you talk about your ex.

"I want to hate him, Mingi. But my heart won't let me."

Mingi kissed the top of your head. He understood what you were going through he's been here before too.

"Sometimes it takes a while for our hearts to want to let go. It's normal. You just haven't had the time to grieve for the loss of your relationship with your person."

He knew it was going to take you some time to heal and he was willing to wait to for you.

I want someone to share my coffee and sunscreen. My mornings, my stories and my bed.

Two weeks with Mingi turned into two months. He moved into your apartment. His toothbrush had a permanent spot next to yours. You had someone to share coffee with in the evenings. Sharing your sunscreen with Mingi became a daily thing.

You told Mingi all your stories from like the time you were ten and your pet cat Frankie brought you a dead mice, and how you when turned thirteen and your mom forget your birthday and tried to make it up to you by giving you a hostess chocolate cupcake she got from the gas station.

And lazy Sundays cuddled up with Mingi felt nicer than anything in the world. You liked having someone to share your bed with again. Mingi got comfortable with you in a sense he knew you better than your ex had.

Mingi tried with you.

That's all you ever wanted from someone was to try.

[dreamtydraw]

Hey euhm- so i've been kinda depressed lately ? Aha- don't wanna spam your feed but for the people interessed let's have a little tchat under the cut of what I have been doing this past days.

As when I'm writting this we're friday in the afternoon, on top of being depressed i'm also sick ! ( youhou- ). I don't know when i'll post this, Might just post it as soon as I finish writting.

Okay so about me, I started talking about feeling bad last week, got slightly better and then boom had an emotional decent and horrible days were I straight up cried like 3 or 5 times. I'm doing a bit better, still feeling shitty and being majorly sick right now ( catched a flu ) but the thing is, during my bad days I decide to straight up uninstall tumblr from my phone.

Why did i do that ? Well because when i'm in my moments of down feeling, i tend to jealous people doing okay which is a bad mindset that I dislike and try to get away from cause it's only unfounded negative feelings that might cause me to be rude toward people I like and I don't want to be an ass.

Now that I'm feeling a bit better i'll try to auto cheer me up by posting and interacting about stuff I like.

SO, what have been doing ? Well struggling mainly. Since I'm super sick today I worked on sending some packages ( ones I could send ) and I'm still waiting for the arrival of the rest of my merch.

Since everything about my shop is a mess right now, I don't know when it will reopen honestly, I need better time to prepare hopefully you'll understand.

I've been working on apple bag but thing is, if my mental health decline once more in the approaching weeks I might put a small stop in production to stop stressing myself. In the best outcome, the update release will be october 31, in worse it will surely be reprogrammed for november/december.

Now on more joyous news at least I'm alive and I want to make a point to say that none of you have any obligation to cheer me up. I received a lot of nice gifts last week when I said I wasn't doing well but it made me feel guilty. So i'm not saying to never be nice to me, My brain can start feeling guilty about anything to be honest, I'm just making sure that you know that it's not your role to cheer me up or any internet person you like, don't feel forced to do that just because I open up about being sad. Sometimes a bitch get sad and just need a kit kat.

I'll try to catch up on things I need to answer and mainly contact people regarding the DTIYS event that ended some time ago.

I hope everyone is doing okay, if any of you reading this is having a hard time regarding their mental health I'm sending you a cosmic radiation hoping this will reach you and make you sleep cause sleeping always help a bit, don't forget to drink water btw.

Lot of loves, and to the 3 sweet people who cared enough to read, I'm wishing you good luck and money suddenly appearing in your bank account. Have a nice day.

and I forgot what else I wanted to say.

eat oranges for vitamin C if your country is cold like mine rn.

[orangeinecstasy]

lucky: one word, pt. two ࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟrobert keating

✧: part one

paring: robert x fem!oc

summery: luck brings them together once again, but after the honeysuckles preform a song about robert, will his perspective on kate change?

a/n: hey everyone! so i originally uploaded these to wattpad, but i wanted to have a bit of a platform change. please let me know what you guys think. my requests are currently open so pleas feel free to send in an idea you have. enjoy!

wc: 2.02 k

*reblogs, likes, and feedback are greatly appreciated!!

Looking into Robert's blue eyes, it truly felt like the world had stopped moving, but that was quickly interrupted by the bartender setting down my drinks. You've got to be fucking kidding me. Right now, the universe, right now?! I glanced down at the drinks and back up at him.

"Shit, I'm sorry I've got to go, but meeting you was really wonderful. Stay lucky!" grabbing the drinks. I leave the bar before he can respond, cursing myself as I do.

However, that was a couple of months ago. I stood outside the band's latest venue, having a last smoke before we went on. Sometimes I thought of that blue-eyed boy, but I never went out of my way to try and find him. There was something almost beautifully sad about not knowing him, and there was a crazy part of me that wanted to keep it that way. Wanted that wonder between the two of us.

Taking the final drag of my cigarette, I throw it onto the concrete below me, stub it out with the toe of my boot, and then walk back into the club's venue.

"Hey, you good?" Fawn says as I walk in, her arm wrapping around my shoulder. "Never better!" I smile, giving her arm a gentle squeeze before gathering everything I need for tonight's show.

"Let's fucking do this, lassies!" Willow yelled out, pumping her fist into the air as the four of us walked on, the crowd erupting in cheers.

Settling behind the drum kit, I look in the cup holding my drumsticks, ensuring I have a couple extra. Even though I had played hundreds of shows, there was still that feeling of nervousness that would build in the pit of my stomach. So many people think that the singer or the guitarist is the "most important band member," but when you truly think about it, it's the drummer. We have to control the tempo, one of the few critical parts of a song. If we slip up, even for a second, the whole set could be ruined.

Still, I take a few deep breaths as I slip in my in-ears and grab a pair of my sticks. I look down at the drum kit, then at the crowd before my sticks come crashing down on the kit, starting the first song of our set.

After we played the second to last song in our set, Kira paused, the spotlight encapsulating her amber skin in an incandescent glow, "Hey guys! Tonight, for our last song, we're going to perform a new one that our amazing drummer, Kate," she moves out of the way allowing me to come into a better view for the crowd. They cheer, "She wrote about this guy she met at a pub. Lucky boy, if you're still out there, she's single. We hope you like it!" The cheers continued as Kira made the announcement. After a beat or two, the cheering calmed, queuing me to start our newest song, Lucky.

"One, two, three." I strike my drumsticks together as I count before starting our final song. The energy that flowed throughout me was like nothing I had felt before. A part of me was really nervous about performing a song I wrote by myself because most of our music was written by the four of us. But that feeling faded as I got into my favorite parts of the beat. But sadly, like all things, the song came to an end.

My breath was heavier than usual as my eyes stared down at the drum kit below me. I took out one of my in-ears to hear the crowd yelling the loudest they had yelled the whole night. I slip my sticks into my back pocket before pulling my shirt up and allowing it to rest on my shoulders, exposing my mind drift and the black bralette I was wearing underneath. Honestly, I didn't care that much; anything to help me cool off before saying our final goodbyes.

I grabbed Kira and Willow's hands, the four of us taking our final bow of the night. "Thank you, everyone!" Fawn said into her mike as we split apart. "Hey, can I borrow that for a second?" I ask Fawn, and she nods, handing me the mike. "I just want to thank everyone for responding positively to our newest song Lucky. It truly does mean the world to me. I love you all. Have a great night!" smiling, I set the mike back down onto its stand before looking into the crowd to see who I should throw my stick to. Then I saw them. Those eyes that I will never forget. The eyes of my lucky boy, Robert.

Once I snapped out of it, I realized that I had been standing there about to throw my drumsticks for an awkward amount of time. Laughing at myself, I throw the sticks to a pair of girls, my eyes quickly flashing back at Robert's before finally walking off the stage.

"Guys…" I say as I start to remove my other in-ear and detach the cords from my exposed body, "I think I just saw the lucky boy in the crowd. I could be going fucking crazy because we just played a song about him, but I swear I would notice those blue eyes anywhere." I set my in-ears down, my hands pushing through my curls as my brain tried to wrap around what I had just seen.

"You're fucking joking!" Willow yells, clapping me on my bare back because I have yet to fix my shirt. "That's crazy!" she laughed, shaking my shoulders as we returned to the dressing room. I love it when my friends think it's the funniest thing in the world when I have a crisis.

I huff, my hand falling from my hair to my side as I lean down to rummage through my bag, grabbing my cigarette and lighter. "I'm going to go out for a smoke. I'll help pack up in a sec." The girls gave a unanimous okay as I started to walk out the door. "Don't forget that we're meeting that band that Kira is friends with after the show!" Fawn called out from the dressing room as I opened the back entrance door. "Okay!" I shouted back quickly before stepping outside into my much-needed alone time.

Lighting the cigarette, I hate a long drag off of it, letting the smoke fumble lazily from my lips. "It couldn't be him. Not in a fucking million years. You're just being crazy, Kate. Get out of your head." I mumble to myself, taking a couple more long drags off the cigarette before a few fans come up to me, asking for pictures and autographs, so of course, I obliged. "Okay, my loves, I have to go. Thank you so much for coming to the show!" throwing my cigarette on the ground, I set it out, waved goodbye to the fans, and went back in through the back door. As I walked in, I could hear the chatter of my bandmates and some unfamiliar male voices coming from the band room, which made me realize that I still hadn't fixed my shirt from half taking it off at the end of the concert. Welp, those pictures will follow me across the internet, I thought as I fixed my white t-shirt back into place before entering the dressing room.

"Hey guys, sorry for being late. I got caught up taking pictures." my hands reach for one another, returning to that nervous habit of twisting my now infamous horseshoe ring. "You're all good! Guys, this is Kate, our drummer. Kate, this is Ryan, Josh, Eli, and-"

"Robert." I cut her off, my eyes slightly widening as my eyes met his. "I cannot fucking believe this." I start laughing to myself, and after a few moments, so does Robert.

"I think they've gone a bit mental…." Ryan says, looking over at Willow with a confused look which she simply shrugs at, not knowing what's going on either.

"This is the lucky boy. Robert is Lucky." he stands, still slightly laughing to himself as he walks over to me, arms wrapping me in a slightly unexpected hug. "It's nice to see you again, horseshoe girl," he said low enough so that only I could hear. "Well, the two of us are going to go for a smoke. We'll be back soon." Robert said as we broke away from the hug, his hand now holding onto mine as he quickly dragged me out of the room before anyone could interject.

The two of us stepped outside into the light night Dublin air, making a slight shiver run down my spine. "I assume we didn't just come here to have a smoke." my eyebrow cocks, as I look up at the taller cigarette between his lips, a lighter following closely behind it. "Hmm, that's debatable." he chuckled, handing me the already lit cig, which I took a long drag from.

"What a fucking crazy way to meet each other again, huh. First, at a pub where we have matching rings. Now at my gig where you were pretty much forced to hear a song completely written about you. At the same time, I stood on stage for five minutes half naked." an embarrassed chuckle leaves my lips, the realization of what the two of us truly experienced setting in, making me unable to look him in the eyes.

"I mean, I'd be more than interested in seeing you half-naked again. Fuck, even fully naked." he laughs, trying to dissolve some of the tension between us as he takes the cig back, taking a few quick drags off of it.

"Phffttt, I think you might have to do a little more convincing than that, love." I nudge his arm gently. "Well… You know what they say about bass players." the two of us erupt in laughter, like old friends who had just shared the most personal inside joke.

"You are a fucking Wiseman." I take the final drag off the cigarette, then step it out.

"But seriously, I know this might sound crazy, but don't you think this is the universe telling us something?" he turns to face me more clearly, the ocean-blue eyes looking into the deepest parts of my persona.

"If I'm being frank, I think it might be. Maybe it's time to test our luck, hmm, Bobby?" I smile up at him, our bodies naturally moving closer until his arm is wrapped around my waist, mine around his neck. "Yeah, I'd like that." he leans down, and I can hear my heart in my chest as our lips finally connect. We melt into each other, and it feels like time is standing still.

We slowly pull away, both of our faces slightly flushed. "We should probably head back." I rub my nape gently, and he nods in agreement, taking my ringed hand into my own.

We walked hand in hand back into the dressing room, and the conversation between our bandmates paused. "Well, look who it is, the lucky couple," Eli says, which causes the room to start filling with laughter.

Even though it was all fun in games at the moment, when I looked up at Rob and he looked down at me, I knew that I was the luckiest girl in the world. So maybe wearing a horseshoe ring for all those years was a good idea.

[littlemourningstarr]

Personal rant/vent under the cut.

So, my grandmother passed away Wednesday evening. I was running around all week as she got settled into hospice, then bringing my grandfather to see her, trying to support my aunt- it's been crazy. Wednesday I barely left the hospital before midnight (she passed with my aunt, my uncle (both her surviving children) and myself with her in the room), then turned around and worked Thursday morning on maybe 3 hours of sleep and having cried more than I have in the past like 10 years combined.

My coworkers and one of my clients have been amazing and understanding. But holy fuck have I realized there are some that just don't see me as human. And I'm not shocked, but it still just hits you hard.

I flat out told one client what happened and she freaked out that I was even in yesterday morning, said the trials didn't matter for the next few days and that I needed to go. But then in a later meeting with a different team, I mentioned casually there was a passing in the family so I would be taking some time off (I just wasn't exactly sure what) and ONE person acknowledged it. The actual pharma client? Never said a word and left the meeting the moment it ended. Then promptly emailed me about all of these other items. I didn't really care for her anyway but holy fuck now? Professionalism is all she's getting.

So I said fuck it and I called in today (or took bereavement??? I honestly don't even know). I have never missed a day at this job- not even when I had covid. It feels weird.

I'm just rambling. I'm tired. I'm fucking sad??? I'm worried to death about my grandfather. I've never seen him cry in my life and now I've seen it like... 5 times in the course of 3 days.

So. Yeah. I've been quiet on here because of life shit. One of my friends has been sending me stuff to try to cheer me up and bless them, they sent a meme they wanted me to do for Sekh. I promised I would lol