#I'm still sad about the ending so I'm trying to cheer myself up
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chimchiri · 2 years ago
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Scrunchy Nose Collection! ♥
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wolfiesmoon · 4 months ago
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When you suddenly cry in front of them :(
Riddle, Vil, Kalim, Malleus x gn!reader (riddle's and vil's are explicitly post overblot tho it's not super important)
i'm back to entering tartarus every day (school started again) so i thought i might as well distract myself with some hot twst guys :)
i havent been very active i know, i just cant get myself to do anything at all these days 😞i am so so sorry for making a kinda lazy short collection of blurbs but i need to get back into my writing groove somehow
(as a sidenote, i'm worried some of these might be ooc? i sincerely apologise if they are :( )
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RIDDLE honestly doesn't know what to do with himself. He never really got the comfort he needed whenever he cried as a child so he had no idea how to comfort you now. He scolds himself internally for not immediately acting and just kind of freezing up beside you so he panics and tries to recall of all the times he saw someone else comforting others in order to end the extremely awkward tension as quickly as possible. He pats your back somewhat rigidly and says "There, there." In an all too awkward manner. You're caught off guard so hard by the sheer akwardness of Riddle's comfort technique that you burst out laughing, troubling Riddle even further. "W...Why are you laughing now?" The dumbfounded expression on his face is the perfect medicine for forgetting your troubles just now. Riddle unintentionally just cheered you up. After the incident, he seemingly becomes less strict with you and starts asking about how you're doing umprompted, which always pleasantly surprises you. Sometimes, Trey even shows up at Ramshackle dorm, holding a tart of your favourite flavour and saying he got orders from Riddle to deliver it to you.
VIL drops his usual strict nature for a bit. Of all people, he would be the one who could tell you were constantly acting strong and unbothered by everything going on around you. He thought of it equal parts admirable as he did foolish. Such intense emotion is not something to keep bottled up inside you and you made him realise that. His expression is surprisingly soft as he places one arm on your back, gently stroking it. He talks you through your feelings with a big sense of maturity and care and you're suprised by just how much he cares for you and your feelings. You don't exactly get that same impression when he's scolding you for not sitting straight or not wearing your uniform properly... regardless, you're very thankful for his words, even the harsher ones about needing to tell someone about things like this. "Tell me, if you must. I will always listen." After the incident, nothing much changes, really. Atleast from the perspective of others. He still gets on your case for not wearing your uniform properly, but he also asks about how you're doing when he gets the chance and does not accept simply "fine" or "okay" for an answer. You simply must elaborate why that is.
KALIM enters big brother mode. He's comforted crying siblings for various reasons before so what makes you any different? He gives you a tight hug, gently rubbing your back and trying to cheer you up with comforting phrases. He'd also try making jokes you to cheer you up and the puns are so bad you might as well start laughing. He didn't even start asking what's wrong but instead waited for you to tell him yourself. He surprised you with how mature (or perhaps just experienced) he is when it comes to crying people. You feel much better even only after a few minutes and you ask Kalim how you can thank him for hearing you out. "Seeing you smile again is reward enough!" He replies and you feel like crying again (but this time not from sadness or stress). After that incident, he always personally invites you to Scarabia parties, hoping they might inject a little joy in your life and keep your mind off things. If you're not a fan of parties, he takes you on carpet rides around the dorm instead.
MALLEUS is shocked into silence. You were smiling at him as sweetly as you always do just a moment ago... He knows how to comfort someone in theory, but now that he has to put it into practice, it feels like he's forgotten everything. He needs to show you that you can rely on him when it comes to your comfort, and that includes crying around him. This might just be one of the most heartbreaking sights he's ever had the displeasure of witnessing. He vows to himself that he never wishes to see you cry again (unless it's at your wedding) and would do anything to prevent it. He wordlessly pulls you into a secure hug, worried that if he does anything else, you might start crying even more. You hug him back and just sob in his arms, thankful for his warm embrace. "It will all be okay, child of man. I'm here, after all." And somehow, you can't help but trust those words with every fiber of your being. After the incident, Malleus ends up confessing what happened to Lilia and Lilia goes into one of those "Oh, how my baby has grown..." rants. But he also does say that Malleus should start inviting you to new places to keep your mind off things and help you let loose. So he does just that, with an added sprinkle of gargoyle-hunting and gargoyle facts. You're now very well educated about gargoyles lol.
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writersrkive · 4 days ago
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Light | Aaron Hotchner
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summary: since a few days ago, you have been distracted. Something about the holidays and Christmas is triggering to you. Apparently, the team doesn't notice this, but your boss, of course, does. He is troubled, but when you say that you are sick on Christmas Eve, right before dinner, he is ready to go with you and keep you company. He also appears with a small gift that can cheer you up.
genre: angst, hurt, comfort.
pairing: Aaron Hotchner x bau!gn!reader
warning: holidays and Christmas being a nostalgic/sad holiday to reader, mention of reader not being from Virginia, family issues (reader), reader is new member of the team, allusion of an age gap (not specific), reader being called "kid" two or three times.
a/n: so... maybe I projected myself a bit into this fic. I hope whoever feels like the main character feels some comfort and understanding here. I'm sorry if there's anything wrong with the writing, I haven't edited yet, but I wanted it posted before Christmas (it's 11pm in my country). English isn't my first language, please be kind <3. Merry Christmas reader, thank you for being here one more year! I'm proud of you.
Masterlist Spanish ver. On Wattpad (coming soon)
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Christmas isn't what it was a few years ago, but neither was your family. When you decided to move to Virginia, far from home, it was hard for you because despite having a broken family, the feeling of wanting to fix everything for everyone was still there. The holidays, especially Christmas, brought back memories of when everything was fine —or so it seemed—.
The dynamic of the team was like a family, but as the newest member —and one of the youngest— it was hard to feel completely into it. However, you didn't feel as isolated as you did at first. So, they didn't notice how nostalgic and sad your aura was the days before.
Oh, but Aaron, your boss, did.
It started the day that some workmates decorated the office with a mini Christmas tree, lights and bows. Everyone was heading home, except him, as usual. The paper work ended so the stoic man was closing the door of his office when he noticed the way you were standing in front of the tree, almost giving him your back. He could see half of the profile he caught himself admiring often. The lights were reflected in the sad look similar to that of a child hoping to obtain something impossible.
“Why are you still here?” He asked, not scolding, but rather with curiosity.
“Oh, good night Hotch. I was finishing some paperwork.” Your expression showed that you had come out of a trance.
“Are you done?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Good. Maybe we can walk to our cars together.”
“Sure.”
He didn't try to make small talk. The feeling of tiredness was in the air, but he also felt that he shouldn't try to break down any kind of personal barrier that you had at that moment. Because despite showing a friendly smile, it was obvious that your mind was somewhere else.
Then, a few days later, you were distracted by something peculiar.
“Hey, are you okay?” Derek asked when he noticed that you weren't listening to his theories. Hotch was talking to a police officer, but he was looking at the way your workmate and you were analyzing the crime scene. “Are you cold?” His teasing smile made you chuckle slightly.
“Yeah. I still haven't gotten used to the weather, sorry.” The lie went unnoticed by your colleague. They were profilers, but you were one too, so it was kind of easy to fake certain things. It wasn't right, but at that time of the year you just wanted to survive. Besides, you couldn't tell them anything, not because you didn't trust them, but because it was too much to handle.
Across the street, Aaron looked in the direction you were looking before Derek spoke to you. It was a park a few blocks away. There was an ice rink, giant decorations, and lots of families gathered around. What could that place have to distract you so much?
There were many other occasions like that. The last time was on Christmas Eve. Months ago, Penelope had decided to buy an instant camera to take photos of the team inside and outside of work, when they had days off.
“Here it is, my beautiful fellas!” The blonde said excitedly. “Your handmade Christmas gift!”
She made all of you sit around the table, so she could put in the center the sparkling red notebook, with silver letters. 'Memories at the BAU' could be read.
“Garcia! It's so beautiful!” Emily said, smiling. Derek hugged his friend in appreciation and JJ got closer to Emily so she could see better.
“Look at that. Always a great time for pasta.” Rossi joked looking at one of the pictures where he could be seen making pasta for dinner after a heavy case.
“Always looking good.” Derek said pointing at a picture of him posing with one of the plushies García had at her office.
“Look at us! But why do you look so sad?” JJ joked looking at a group photo. You could be seen at the back with a forced smile.
“I was a little tired, sorry.” You answered, but the reality was that you had received some messages from your family minutes before that photo was taken.
“Hey, why did you take a photo of me taking a nap?” The confused tone in Spencer's voice made you laugh a little, but Aaron noticed the way your eyes didn't light up.
“Does anyone know where our newest member is?” Derek asked, smiling. He can't help but remember the way Emily, JJ and he teased you before. You started to get late to a few compromises —it happened at work once or twice—, but your boss didn't scold you like he would scold anyone else on the team. “He has a soft spot for someone.” Derek playfully twitched that time, thinking the bags under your eyes weren't caused by anything but work —he was wrong—.
“The kid just sent a message to the group chat.” Rossi announced.
“Sick?” Penelope showed her worry, reading your message.
Aaron felt a weird pinch on the chest. He immediately got even more worried than everyone in Rossi's house, even if his face just tensed a little bit more than usual. In his mind he debated whether to go with you to make sure you were okay, even though it might be intrusive.
Maybe you needed space….
Or maybe there was something else you weren't telling them, just like he noticed before.
“Am… I think I'm a little bit sick too.” He whispered after a while.
“What? We are about to eat dinner.” Emily said a little sad. She was worried about the team's health now that Aaron and you were sick.
“I'll be fine. I'm going to take some food with me in case I get hungry later." His movements were a little fast, as if in a hurry.
“Are you sure you don't need a medic, Aaron?” His old friend said and the boss could sense a little teasing in his tone.
“I'm good, I just need to go right now. I'll see you tomorrow. Everyone, please be safe.” The team could sense sincerity in those words when he gave them one last look, after he took the food, his jacket and his keys, and before stepping out of the house.
“Kid is gonna have some company.” Derek teased and everyone, including Reid, smiled knowing what was going on.
Both of you were surprised when you opened the door. He didn't expect to see you with red puffy eyes and nose, and you didn't expect him there, in front of your house, holding some tuppers with food and something else tangled in his arms.
“Hotch?” Your furrowed eyebrows and tilted head made his chest feel warm. You looked confused and also cute. He felt a little bad to think like that when something was wrong with you.
“I needed to make sure you were okay.” That's all he said.
“Oh… Am… I'm just a little…”
“Sick? I don't think so. You have been acting weird, and Christmas has something to do with that. I know because apparently it triggers something that makes you… sad.” His voice was soft. It felt like he didn't want to expose you, but he needed to show how much he knew about the situation. “I don't think you actually fool them. At least, not now. Maybe in the beginning, but that wasn't my case.” But you did feel exposed, even a little ashamed. The lack of movement told Hotch that you were uncomfortable. “I'm sorry…”
“It's okay. I guess it's impossible to fool S.S.A. Aaron Hotchner.” You showed a sad smile, it was more like a grin. “Wait, what about Jack?”
“He's with his aunt. They were on a trip I couldn't join because of obvious reasons. I guess we can keep each other company.” Little by little he had begun to show a smile that was contagious to you.
“Sure.”
When he walked in he noticed the lack of decorations on the surroundings. There was just a small tree at the back of a hall. It had a start at the top and had some lights and spheres. That was it.
“I'm sorry if I'm being intrusive, but can I ask what's wrong?” he asked when you started to help him to put the food on two plates.
You sighted thinking about all the things you needed to explain so you could give him an answer. “It's complicated. I don't know if I wanna talk about that.”
“That's okay. Then, can you tell me how you are feeling?”
You smiled, knowing he changed the question so as not to make you feel uncomfortable, while still keeping in mind the fact that he needed to know how you were feeling. “Everything brings memories. I'm supposed to be with my family, but what family?” I asked, sitting next to him in the kitchen. “Sometimes I wish things were like before, like having a time machine and just going there: where everyone was. Now I know how heavy the family issues were, but I was a kid so at least I was living in a lie… a good lie.”
“I know family is complicated. There's people who hurt other people, and that's not right, but there's too much.”
“Exactly…”
“But you have a family here too, now.” He whispered. And the way he looked at you made you feel like you weren't alone, at least not how you have thought.
“That's why I bring Rossi's lasagna with me. He's gonna be sad if you don't get to try it.”
Dinner was good. Of course you loved Rossi's cooking, but you came to the conclusion that it was because of the company of your boss. He helped a lot by distracting you, chatting about Jack, some plans outside of work and various things. After a few hours you couldn't handle your curiosity anymore.
“Hotch, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, what is it?” Apparently, your question took him by surprise, perhaps it was the tone in which you spoke to him, almost tenderly.
“What is that?” You pointed at what he left coiled up on the armrest of one of the sofas in your living room. It looked like a silver wire with transparent stuff on it.
“These are Jack's favorite lights. We bought it a few years ago. He loved them until we bought a set of identical, larger lights. Do you want to see?”
“Yes!” Your childish tone made him smile.
He untangled the lights and plugged them into the nearest socket, quickly his hands and the place where the lights rested shone brightly.
“Wow…” It was almost a whisper, but Aaron enjoyed the answer as if it was a shout of joy. “These are beautiful.”
“I knew you liked the lights.”
“Huh? Oh! You mean the night when you caught me staring at the…”
“Yeah.”
“Well, yeah, I liked lights. I think I've always liked them, but at some point the feeling became sad."
“They are for you.”
“No, but, Jack…”
“Like I said, he has new ones, so, there's no problem. He will love that you have them.”
“Can you help me to…” You hesitated.
“Sure. Let's go, where do you want them?”
A fun playlist invaded your house. While Hotch held a ladder and watched your back to see if you lost your balance, you placed the string of lights in the living room window.
“Can you turn them on?” You asked him gently. The decorated window came to life as did your eyes and Aaron couldn't feel calmer as he admired your excited countenance.
“I'm glad you liked them.”
Suddenly, cries of excitement were heard from neighboring houses and some Christmas songs began to play from the speakers of nearby restaurants even louder.
“Merry Christmas, Hotch.” You said when you came down from the ladder. The man who came to brighten your night didn't think that seeing your expression would fill his chest with warmth.
“Merry Christmas, kid.”
You definitely didn't know or would have imagined that the man who watched your back at work was what you needed to feel better. He brought the light you needed for days.
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edutainer2022 · 23 days ago
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Power outages are wanky again after the night bombing. So I distract myself with a story instead of work, while the power is up. It's Gordon's 21st birthday and he gets a meaningful moment with Scott. Some sad memories resurface, but mostly it's all love all around.
Thanks go to @janetm74 for support and for cheering my recent craving of Gordon and Scott dynamics.
COMING OF AGE
The party, Tracy-style, was, of course, as bright, and fun, and loud an affair on the island as would befit Gordon's twenty first birthday. Rivaled maybe only by Gordon's eighteenth, several years back. Some details of that one Scott still didn't need to know about, for biggest brother's peace of mind. There were yet more festivities planned on the mainland, rescues permitting, including a get together with Gordon's swimming team buddies and a deep dive into the finest night club scene the world had to offer with brothers and Kayo. Some parts of those developments Scott probably too didn't need to know about.
Despite the general merry all around and copious amounts of good food on the offer, Scott had to be hunted down on the balcony, overlooking the ocean. Alone. Figured! Trust Scott to develop an empty nest syndrome despite all his little brothers and loved ones being around and accounted for, with no intention to leave.
Gordon plonked a tumbler of whiskey on the bannister, where Scott's hand was gripping it, and a gaudy neon cocktail, complete with a tiny umbrella and tinsel, for himself. Scott arched a brow quizzically.
"What? For the record, you do realize this isn't my first alcoholic drink?"
The arched brow slid into a slight frown, but Scott didn't take the bait.
"I'm also not a virgin."
The expression of abject horror on big brother's face was completely worth it.
Gordon pressed the glass into Scott's hand and raised his own concoction in a mock toast.
"Here's to me not being legally your problem anymore, Scooter!"
An instant flash of rue, across big brother's face, not concealed on time, was probably the crux of the whole moping on the balcony in solitude situation. If Gordon were honest, his own nonchalance was only half convincing.
Scott smiled the fond little-brother smile down at him, however, and Gordon felt something unwind in his chest he didn't know was coiled tight. Strong, sure arms drew him into a warm hug. Big brother rested his chin on the chlorine bleached mop and hummed.
"Aw, you'll always be my problem, Gordie!"
Gordon let himself relax a moment against the blue denim. The safest place in the world.
A memory surfaced and Gordon shifted to look up at Scott. Maybe not the best of his ideas to speak up that instant, but they hardly ever were.
"Hey, remember Mom's funeral?"
Scott frowned again, unsure where that was going. But Gordon was already immersed in reminisce.
"It was the morning of and Allie was crying as you put him in that tiny black suit. I was being difficult and you let me wear blue fish socks!"
[Scott, already in his funeral suit, made sure everyone was up and getting ready that morning, so that Dad wouldn't be upset more. He was at the end of his wits with Allie's meltdown, though. The toddler wriggled and cried for Mommy as Scott was trying to wrangle him into a tiniest mourning suit. On cue, Gordon flat out refused to put on the suit either and wanted to attend the funeral in his squid pijamas. Scott struck a deal with the pre-schooler that he could wear yellow socks with the blue fish print to go with the dress shoes. Mom's favorite.]
Scott's smile was sad again and Gordon mentally kicked himself.
"You weren't difficult, Gordie. You were six and Mom was gone. It's okay!"
It wasn't! That was the point Gordon was getting at, in a however roundabout way.
"You let me wear the fish socks and it felt like Mom was there with me. And then, at the wake, Allie was cranky again and you had to carry him. So I wanted you to carry me too."
[Tall and athletic at fourteen, Scott nonetheless couldn't pick up the toddler and the six-year-old little swimmer at the same time. So he found an unoccupied futon and hoisted both baby brothers into his lap. Virgil and John gravited near too, leaning both sides of him. Virgil, quiet and almost zoned out from all the tears. John - a translucent ghost from insomnia. People were swirling around, making smalltalk or making compassionate faces at their Dad, shaking his hand and patting his shoulder somewhere in the middle of the crowd.]
"There were all those people around! But they were there for Dad, not for us! I remember I looked up at you, Scotty, and you looked so completely alone. Like you were drowning. We had you, but you had nobody there."
In the present, Scott blinked away telltale moisture and tried for a reassuring smile. Ever the big brother.
"I had you lot, Gords! It's alright!"
"That's my point!"
Gordon didn't plan to be that intense, but maybe the dash of rum in the cocktail was getting to his head. He was clutching big brother's bicep for emphasis.
"You got us! I mean, I know Virgil and John help out, but I'm an adult now too, or whatever. You got me too! You don't have to be alone!"
Scott's next smile, Gordon could argue, was of the we'll-see-about-that variety, but there was genuine gratitude in the now wistful blue.
Another tight hug was the only response he got, for now, till somebody called them back into the lounge for a family photo.
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micahulrichdraws · 4 months ago
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I don't think self-deprecation or concern for the person's well-being is ever going to come across well to someone saying they like what you do. Maybe I'm missing something, but there are reasons to like your art besides being miserable. Even if only the truly miserable liked your work, responding to them by pointing out how miserable they must be wouldn't feel great for them. Your art isn't giving them depression, and it's not like you're contributing to net suffering by making art with ~themes~, so it seems unnecessary to bring up. You suggested that if you struggle to enjoy life, and you make something, anyone who resonates will also struggle to enjoy life. I disagree. Some people will like it for completely shallow reasons. Some people have empathy for others' suffering. You can have a decent life and no mental illness and probably still appreciate a well-drawn skeleton. I don't know what kind of art a perfect world would produce, but any world where people are mortal is going to have sadness, and some art will reflect that. Yours isn't uniquely dark.
Sorry if you've gotten 100 asks saying this same thing. I wasn't sure based on the ones you responded to, and I just found your blog. I know it's sort of a joke, bc you do still sell art prints and stuff, so you clearly are okay with people liking your art. Tbh, I /had/ depression for a few years, so I'm not exactly proof against the theory that your art somolehow only appeals to depressed people. It seems unlikely, though. And the way you talk about your art as "garbage" kind of gave me flashbacks to the sort of self-deprecating humor I'd use when I hated myself. I don't know you or how you're doing, but that feeling made me want to say something.
You didn't just miss something, you missed like, everything I've ever said on my blog about like, everything to the point I'm not even sure this was intended for me? Like I'd break it down, point by point and be like 'no what are you smoking' but that'd be a waste of time after the 'why do you think my art gives people depression!?' part of whatever this is. Like, this is offensive levels of trying to make me be someone I'm not for the sake of a hypothetical argument against a strawman. So if, you want to take offense to who I am in case you misclick and end up here again here's an asshole enough of a response to give you a legitimate reason to find me intolerable:
Welcome to my page! I make art, jokes, and bullshit with folks to make people happy. I started doing this when I was big sad, because cheering people up cheers me up. Now, here's the crazy part: some people are very sad, and sometimes they tell me it makes them a small amount of happy, which gives me dopamine and makes me do it again. The word 'some' means 'not everyone', or even 'a fraction of a percentage'. For example, in this case, it means 'most people just like my drawings but some people get an extra lil bit out of it'. I don't take myself seriously because I know that the art world is insanely intimidating to those outside of it, and sometimes artists tend to be egotistical and condescending, a word that means 'having or showing a feeling of patronizing superiority'. Naturally, I do everything in my power to avoid that, because I'm a very 'gates open' kinda person.
So, here's the WILD part: in my perfect world I would've never had depression. Now, I know, that would have been inconvenient for you as someone who passed by my page one time, and I do apologize. I also apologize that I don't make 'dark art', because I like frogs and mice doing cool shit. Finally, I apologize for my art having -~*themes and concepts*~-, I know good art only comes from ChatGPT and that was my bad.
Sike, I didn't apologize, my fingers were crossed behind my back when I said that. Fuck you for thinking me not wanting to be around for a decade is 'worth' because I drew a mediocre skeleton, and because somehow sadness is necessary. That line of thinking is so awful, here's a video explaining it:
youtube
PS: the reason my friends and I in these parts call my art 'art garbage' is because that's what my professors called it back in school for like 4 years, back when I started this shitshow. Much love.
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irishmammonagenda · 7 months ago
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Hii!! 🧚‍♀️It's Wee Emo anon 🍾
Really liked your last work, so here i am again
Can i request brothers reaction on MC who cry over small things?
Like they see little kitten on the street and - WHOOP! - they're bubbling sobbing mess
I'm kinda can't cry (sounds dramatic lol) and wanna MC to feel it instead of me 😬
Love your works, keep going bestie💐🏃‍♂️
HI WEE EMO <3 please ignore the fact you sent me this on april 27th and its now june i had gcses to prepare for 😔✊
anyway, who let you into my house 😧🤨
no seriously i've cried at multiple south park episodes. south park. sometimes i wanna cry when i see my dog i cannot be trusted i tear up so easily especially when im writing🙁
for not being able to cry that is not very good for you fr:
i used to not be able to cry + still only really tear up, some tears drip down and let out like 2 sobbing sounds before im good again, i dont even have to try and stop crying, two sobs and im done, but my biggest tip is, get tired like really sleepy to the point where your eyes water bc of tiredness then watch something really sad.
i ha to literally train myself to be able to cry again bro dw, i wish i could have a big long cry but like 3 mins of crying is better than none, trust me wee emo you'll feel better
#dontbottleupyouremotions
ANYWAY:
this was very hard to imagine their reactions to idk why, but i tried so 😔✊
grma wee emo for requesting <3 and grma everyone else for reading <3
Obey Me Brothers With a Sensitive MC <3
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It was safe to say you were sensitive, back when Melanie Martinez's music was a lot better, you really could say that the song 'Crybaby' pretty much encapsulated your entire being, it still did, but you liked to think you were more mature in your music taste now. (You weren't)
Being suddenly catapulted into the Devildom did a number on your emotions, and you found yourself quite numb. But as you adjusted, and bonded with the others, you found that you were back to your usual self, which was a crybaby.
So then how do the brothers react?
LUCIFER
Great. Two Mammons.
At least Mammon No.2 (you) isnt a tsundere about it.
Lucifer does not like seeing you cry. Even if its because something is cute, (although he does find it quite adorable, not that he'd admit it)
This demon is of the opinion that tears should never disgrace your beautiful eyes.
He will invite you to listen to his records with him and purposely put on sad ones or really sweet ones so you grip onto him while you tear up,
He is a demon, after all. ;)
MAMMON
Finally. Someone who cries more than him!
It actually makes him feel safer around you, like you wont bully him for being more sensitive than his brothers.
Actually ends up dropping a lot of his tsundere act around you.
You watch movies together, but always have to check the Devildom version of 'doesthedogdie.com'
Idk, I feel like Mammon would give you a bit of bother for it at first but then slowly start to like, open up more, because he really does see himself in you like that.
LEVIATHAN
He blanks.
One day you start crying because of how cute the anime you both were watching was, Levi thought you were geniunely upset, so he tried to cheer you up.
You end up thinking that its really sweet and start crying harder.
Leviathan PANICKS.
Even now, he still gets really nervous when you start crying, and has popped into his demon form more times than he can count when you grab onto him and sniffle.
Please he's already so awkward he can't handle how cute you are.
You might make him start crying as well :(
SATAN
Satan 100% gets so angry he starts crying so he can kind of understand it.
He's just glad you cry over positive things :)
His favourite moment was definetly when you teared up over a small kitten. (He took several photos and also took the kitten home)
Like Lucifer he 100% invites you to read with him and picks the fluffiest most adorable romance he can find, or the saddest most heartbreaking romance he can find.
He likes when you cling onto him and look up at him with those big teary eyes.
He's a demon. What did you expect, ;)
ASMODEUS
He thinks you're adorable.
Any emotion on your face is adorable to him actually. <3
If you wear makeup he makes sure to get you waterproof mascara and other eye makeup so your beautiful tears dont ruin your beautiful makeup <3
If any of you remember that crying girl makeup trend? Yeah he deffo starts that up in the Devildom (a) to make you feel less embarrassed about it and (b) because he thinks youre so beautiful when you express yourself.
BEELZEBUB
He doesn't cry a lot, it's not exactly something that comes naturally to him at all.
Its not that he CANT cry or that he holds his tears back, its just that he doesn't normally process or reaction to things with tears.
Only in serious serious situations will he cry.
So when he sees you crying over one of those little onigiri things that are literally adorable, he thinks that you've somehow hurt yourself. (i nabbed this off of pinterest)
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Beel panics, and mentally goes over the ingredients in his head, did he order something with an ingredient that was dangerous to humans?
He calms down when he realises that you're crying because it looks cute.
He feels you with that.
Makes an effort to take you to more places with food items displayed in cute ways.
Though you do have to look away while Beel cuts them up for you, otherwise you wouldnt be able to eat it.
BELPHEGOR
He laughs at you.
Point blank.
Originally when he's in the attic he uses your sensitivity as a way to manipulate you.
But post lesson 16, he really starts to appreciate it more.
This bastard will use his powers as the youngest sibling against you, he'll dress up in cute onesies and give you puppy eyes, all to coax you into taking naps with him.
Which you do.
I have no idea how half of these fuckheads would react tbh
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mirai-e-jump · 19 days ago
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TV Life, 12/13/2024 Issue ft. Kawasaki Honoka/Koga Ruito & Suzuki Miu (translations below)
Publication: November 27, 2024
GavvPare! Vol.7 (Kawasaki Honoka & Koga Ruito)
-How we move on is something to note-
Koga: Jeebh and Shita are twins, so including their appearance, they share alot of similarities, however, in reality, we're polar opposites.
Kawasaki: That's right (laughs). We kept looking for something we share in common, but we couldn't find anything.
Koga: (laughs). Still, I feel that that's why we're able to play off each other while compensating for what the other's missing.
Kawasaki: While also being pulled along throughout the performance, I've learned alot from him about how to behave on set. I'm not really the type that's able to "switch on and off," but Koga-chan is able to switch perfectly. I thought he was a professional when I saw how he recited his lines before the performance and how he stayed focused. Also, there are times where he helps me by casually following up with me when I can't properly express what I want to say. Thank you!
Koga: Same here. I'm a shy person, but thanks to her always talking with me, Hono-chan's cheerfulness really helped me get accustomed to the set. Once we got closer, we were able to just go ahead with a, "I'll do it this way here" and "OK," all without having to talk specifically about the performance or making adjustments in advance.
Kawasaki: When we were told that we were fired in episode 9, I personally thought, "If we really are fired, it's too soon for us to make an exit!" (laughs). Just like how Shita wants to be a part of Stomach Inc forever, as an actor, I want to stay on the set for as long as possible, so it was easy for me to create emotions that were similar to my own.
Koga: I get that. They both bullied Gavv quite abit, but after being told that they were fired, they started to get impatient…I tried making my tone harsher and smiling less in order to express that impatience, that way, the viewers would notice the change when they watch, as those details may be foreshadowing of what's to come.
Kawasaki: I hope you don't overlook that!
Koga: At the end of episode 12, we were determined to never forgive Gavv, so one of the things to note will be how we move on from episode 13.
Kawasaki: As I expressed my mixed emotions of anger and sadness, I had expressions on my face that I had never seen on myself before, so I'm looking forward to seeing how it'll look on air! _
BakuDAYS Vol.19 (Suzuki Miu)
-I want to act out Mira's struggles with care!-
Recently, episode 36 was the one that left the biggest impression on me, as I was playing the role while hoping to bring out the best in Mira. There's a scene in the Deliverer's garage where Mira tells Taiya and Boon-chan, "It's frustrating that I can't help Aki's dream come true." Mira is sometimes presented as "the sun of the Boonboomgers," but she's not exclusively cheerful, as she also has her own frustrations and struggles. So, for the scene at the Deliverer's garage, I played the role carefully, hoping to convey her frustrations and her relationship with Aki.
Mira's innocent and full of energy. I think characters like that can come across as selfish if they mess up, but Mira's able to properly understand other people's feelings and put them before herself. In episode 36, when Aki took Mira's Boonboom Changer and tried to transform, the first thing Mira said to her was, "Why'd you try doing such a dangerous thing?" I thought it was just like Mira to naturally express her worries first before condemning the other person for what they had done.
Now that I think about it, this episode was my last "turn" in this series. We've been filming Boonboomger almost every day, so I'm really sad that this life is coming to an end, and I feel as if I'm losing a part of myself. We've been filming for a year, so there's an incredible sense of unity on set. I was able to reaffirm how fun it is to create a single production together!
Going forward, there'll be a major event that we can't overcome by cheerfulness and energy alone. Nevertheless, it'd make me happy if you could watch the Boonboomgers crank up as they push forward!
Q: What do you want to control through help from the "Driver"?
A: I really sleep alot (laughs). I always sleep way too much, so I want to control my sleep! I tend to fall asleep when we travel by car, but I'd like to be able to stay up and make the most of my time.
BakuageSHOT: In between filming, I found Yaru-chan just hanging around, so we took a double shot! His voice is just so cute, that I end up imitating him. The friendship between the Sanseaters in episode 38 really moved me!
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oliversrarebooks · 9 months ago
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Rayan is from @sowhumpshaped's story Stray. I can't resist a sad wet cat man who thinks he knows best. This is set in the timeline where Rayan gets caught and tested to be a pet.
tw: dehumanization, conditioning, drugging, memory loss, facility/institution
"Did you -- did you actually say --" 
"That your results show that you're a pet, yes," the nurse affirmed with a big, cheerful smile. "You're very lucky we caught you for this silly little mistake before things ended up worse."
Rayan's heart dropped into his shoes. "Are you sure?" he blurted out before thinking. "I know the test is accurate, but -- there's never any mistakes? There have to be mistakes sometimes, right?"
The expression on her face was friendly but firm. "No, there are no mistakes. You know that."
"I know that..." He stared numbly at his hands. The test was accurate, of course. Everyone knew that. If it weren't, they'd have to worry about accidentally treating people as pets, which would be horrible. 
The test was accurate. Everyone knew that.
He felt sick.
"It's all right, poor dear. I know this must be a shock," she said. "You must have been struggling so much, weren't you?"
He didn't answer, still trying to process it all. A pet...
"Haven't you ever wondered if you might be a pet? When you see happy pets in the park, didn't you feel a longing inside?"
"I -- I did, but I thought that was because I wanted a pet for myself -- "
"That feeling was because a part of you deep down knew where you belonged," she said. "And now we've found you, and everything will be okay, you'll see. You won't have to struggle like that any more. You won't need to worry about big, scary people concerns like jobs and money and education. You'll be so much happier."
Rayan swallowed the lump in his throat. He had, secretly, sometimes felt that life would be easier as a pet, with no worries beyond pleasing his owner. He'd never vocalized these thoughts, worried that someone would think he was a strange deviant, like those people who pretended to be pets --
But if he was a pet all along, those thoughts would be normal, wouldn't they?
"What's going to happen to me now?"
"Well, dear, you've been trying so hard to be a person for so many years that you've picked up a lot of bad habits," she said. "That's not your fault, of course, you can't be blamed for trying your best. But now we have to train you out of all those nasty bad habits, do you see? It's not healthy for a pet to think it's a person."
That was exactly what he'd told 13, wasn't it? And he was just the same. No wonder he'd been so sympathetic.
He was bunching the hospital gown with both hands. "Will the training be hard?"
"For a sweet pet like you? No, I don't think it will be. I think you'll find the training to be very easy, much easier than pretending to be a person. It's going to be a big weight lifted from you. You'll see."
"And -- my memories --"
The nurse sighed. "That's an important part of the process, as I'm sure you know. Happy pets can't have those awful, distressing memories of trying to be a person. This is what's best for you."
It was what was best for pets, he knew that. So it must be what's best for him. But still, he didn't want to...
"It will be painless," she said reassuringly. "We're just going to give you some nice medicine for pets with bad habits and scary memories. It'll make you feel a little funny and sleepy, and in just a few days, you'll start to feel so much better."
He nodded, still feeling miserable inside. It felt like this should be happening to someone else, that it was a dream. That he'd wake up in his own apartment any minute now.
"Come with me, now. We have a treatment room all ready just for you. You won't have to worry about a single thing."
Rayan didn't argue or struggle as she gently ushered him forward and out of the room. His hands felt cold and his legs felt shaky. 
It was for the best, he reassured himself. If the test said he was a pet, he must be a pet. And if he was a pet, the treatment would make him feel better. The only reason he felt so bad was because he hadn't gotten the proper treatments for a pet. He'd always worried something had been wrong with him, and now he knew what the problem was, and was going to get it fixed.
He was going to be trained. He wouldn't have to worry about holding down a job or disappointing his parents any more than he already had by turning out to be a pet. He'd make some owner very happy.
...He was going to forget his family, his friends, the shelter, everything that made him happy...
It was for the best. It had to be. If it wasn't, if the test could be wrong, if the treatments weren't appropriate, then the whole pet system was monstrous. All of his friends at the shelter and all of the pet owners he knew weren't monsters. They were kind people, and they loved their pets and knew what was best for them.
What was best for him.
He'd feel a lot better about it all when he was treated.
The nurse guided him into an elevator, and they went down to a basement level, exiting out into a brightly lit corridor filled with doctors and nurses bustling about, but no pets that he could see. They walked down a hall and turned left, Rayan fighting his anxiety every step of the way, until the nurse pushed open a door and beckoned him inside.
It was a bit like a hospital room, with three walls in stark white and the fourth painted with a childish mural of a blue sky. The medical bed was lower to the ground than normal, and there was a low counter with a sink in it. There was a metal pet bowl and metal water bottle on the counter, a leash tacked onto the wall, and a crate of brightly colored toys in the corner.
"Here we are!" the nurse chirped. "Now you can just get comfortable and your new handler will be in shortly."
"...Okay." Rayan awkwardly situated himself on the bed and watched the nurse leave, and he was left alone with his own conflicted thoughts.
He couldn't help but wonder what they'd tell his parents. Would they be disappointed? Angry? Would they miss him? He hoped they would understand. Would his friends at the shelter find out? Did they ever suspect? Would they notice when he didn't turn up to --
The door opened, and a young person with hair cropped short and a white coat walked in. They were carrying a small paper cup in one hand and a basket containing a blanket and a few other things. "Hello there. I'm Kay, and I'll be your handler for your treatment," they said with a smile, setting down her things on the table. "Oh, you poor thing. You just found out that you're a pet, I've been told. You must be so scared and confused."
Rayan could only nod, embarrassment creeping up his cheeks. A handler for new pets, the sort of job he had been hoping for.
"You have nothing to worry about. I can already tell that you're going to be such a good boy." They reached out their hand to pet Rayan's hair, and he didn't shy away from it. The gentle touch as they ruffled his hair felt... nice. Comforting. He was leaning into it before he could stop himself.
"Oh, do you like that?" Kay cooed. "Aww, such a good boy, yes you are."
The embarrassment in his face grew more intense as he accepted the petting. He did like it, and that meant... that meant he really must be a pet, didn't it? A person wouldn't enjoy being patted and soothed like this. Anyone would consider that deviant behavior for a person, but it was expected behavior for a pet. Desired, even. 
So it was true, wasn't it? His struggle to hold down a job, to live independently, to accomplish the things everyone else seemed to do with so little effort, it was all because he was a pet. This was really happening. His eyes grew watery and a tear slid down his cheek.
"Oh dear, oh dear. It's okay," said Kay, producing a tissue from their pocket and wiping at Rayan's eyes. "It's okay to be sad. We'll get you all fixed up."
"May I ask a question, please?" 
"Yes, dear."
"What are they going to tell my family?"
"Our staff is already preparing to deliver the message. They're trained in supporting families during this difficult time. They'll be in good hands, I promise. You won't need to worry about them."
"...All right." That was the best he could hope for, wasn't it?
"Here, let's get you your medication." Kay handed him the paper cup, which was three-quarters full of a thick red liquid that smelled like artificial cherries. "You'll need medication three times a day at the beginning of your treatment, and then we'll taper it off to a lower dose."
Rayan couldn't help but hesitate before drinking it. This must be the medicine that all pets took, the one that would erase his memories, his ability to read and write, all the things he learned as an adult. As a person.
But if he wasn't a person, then he shouldn't have those memories in the first place. The medicine would fix him, wouldn't it?
"Go on, drink it up. You need your medicine, dear."
He closed his eyes and drank. It was cloyingly sweet with a sickly aftertaste. 
"Very good!" Kay reached into the basket and pulled out a flimsy plastic collar with a printed label on it. "This is your temporary collar until you get a real one. You're number 25."
"Twenty-five..." he repeated in a daze. That's right. He wouldn't be "Rayan" any more, not ever again.
"You'll get a much better name when you're adopted," they said, clipping the collar around his neck. It felt cold as he ran his fingers along it. They pulled out a metallic cuff that locked around his wrist. "And this is so we don't lose you, dear."
"...Okay."
"There are only a few rules in the facility. You must not leave this room without permission. You must follow all of the instructions the handlers give you. You must not harm any handlers or any of the other pets. There will be punishments if you fail to follow the rules -- they're for your own good, and the good of the staff and the pets, of course."
"Right." 
They showed Rayan -- no, he was 25 now, wasn't he? -- a remote with one big round button on it. "If you need help, just press this button! But don't abuse it, or we'll have to take it away, do you understand?"
He nodded. "Uh -- uh-huh." It was getting hard to focus on what Kay was saying, even though he knew it was important. 
"Tomorrow we'll be giving you a medical evaluation and start the first steps of your treatment. You'll be -- and then we'll --"
25 rubbed at his eyes. His head felt foggy, and everything seemed so far away.
"Oh, dear." Kay's voice echoed through his mind. "That must be the medicine kicking in. Why don't you settle in for a nice nap, then? We can talk about these things in the morning."
He nodded. That sounded perfect.
"Just lay down on the bed and we'll get you all tucked in."
As 25 curled up onto the bed, Kay spread the warm and weighty blanket over him. patting his head again. "Good night, dear. Sleep well, and have pleasant dreams." They turned off the light and shut the door behind them with a click.
25 stared out into the darkness. So much had happened since he'd found 13. While he'd sometimes imagined what it would be like to be a pet, thoughts he never shared with anyone, he never seriously thought he'd be here in a facility. And now he'd never see his parents or his own apartment ever again. Despite how drowsy he was, there was no way he was getting to sleep, not with the anxious knot in his stomach.
But after a few minutes, he felt the anxiety start to dissolve away, leaving a sensation of dull calm. It must be the medicine, he figured, as his eyelids began to droop and his thoughts scatter.
He was feeling better already, just like they'd said. They really did know what was best for him.
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astradyke · 2 months ago
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MY EXPERIENCE W/ TIT TOUR (tysons 2)
( written while looping I'm Not Okay (I Promise) by MCR, and also a car alarm going off outside my dorm room repeatedly :') )
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NON-SPOILER SECTION:
SO many sweet people in line. someone gave us (me, my best friend, and my other beautiful friend) custom dan & phil stickers (pictured above), there was a lovely person in cat whiskers making sure people knew the difference between the gen admission & silver line, etc. phannies have the coolest fashion sense all the sick lovely lesbians were making me nervous... <3
s/o to my best friend's running capacity we were first in merch line!!! I am so endlessly happy with my photocard haul especially the uni hoodie one that one is my FAVORITE, also I love this long-sleeve so much. I almost got more merch but I held myself back and I think that was a good call! Also a super cool phannie made custom photocards and I got a silly dan one :D
y'all already saw but I met Clo @bitchslapblastoids who is the first mutual I have ever met in real life ever! between you and me... she is super kind and also really cool :]
our seats were so good!! balcony like row F or whatever but it worked out <3 our seatmate was also very kind!!!
pre-show people danced to HOT TO GO! and someone held up a Palestine flag and we all cheered! and people were moshing to von dutch which is so beautiful to me
SPOILER SECTION:
List of favorite jokes included: "Now our show passes the Bechdel test!" "I have kind of an aloof sociopath vibe going. ... which has worked for me :)" "[I am not satisfied on screen] What was that about? // I think I was just horny that day." "Scared of my life without you when I kill you!" "Dan had depression :D!!" "Enough about the gay, we've already done the gay// Enough about the depression, we've already talked about the depression."
No "sorry daddy, I mean father" line, which is devastating, BUT we didn't get the whole 'do you think Dan Howell' can commit schpiel with the wedding... much to think about
our conspiracies were pumpkin, faked sleepless night 3, bar, and wedding! i deeply wanted the other conspiracies i am so not going to lie but it's okay...
our "one minute" tangent was about electricity, clo made a post about this but they made a God and Adam joke because Phil tried to electrocute Dan and it failed so they were just awkwardly touching fingertips for a period of time
Nothing could have prepared me for the Phil on top of Dan choking him with the llama hat thing. Like i knew it was going to happen but still nothing could have prepared me. i think i fully grabbed my best friend's arm and shoulders and shook them a bit
our confessions and like nolemodel bit were really funny shout out DMV phannies!!!
Really made me sad when phil made the joke about babysitting like NO!!! YOUR CONTENT IS THE REASON I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT WHEN MY PARANOIA IS BAD!!!!!!!! I LOVE U HIATUS YR CONTENT PHIL!!!! But his whole thing about the hiatus being a good thing in the end because it brought us here... <333
every segment felt perfectly timed and the entire show was just so funny and good. Like ultimately i can yearn for having gotten different conspiracies or slightly different vibes but altogether it was incredible.
THE SONG WAS LIFE-CHANGING. I knew more about it thru spoilers than I had thought but either way not only was it so fucking good, like, I'm going to get I-D-G-A-F it saved me tattooed. I have decided this.
WRAP UP THOUGHTS:
I first got into Dan and Phil when I was 11/12-- my first video was post Daniel Howell rebrand, and it was Daniel and Depression, I'll give you three guesses as to why my friend at the time recommended that video. I was obviously a die-hard phan at the time, reading phic and watching the compilations and obsessed with their gaming videos. I remember being like, unfathomably depressed trying to do math homework in bed, and just 'secretely' watching their videos instead. I can remember exactly when the first WDAPTEO dropped, and like how much I wanted to go to interactive introverts but was too scared to (I think I'm glad I didn't go for personal reasons) but my friends did go. I remember I was leaving summer gym class before I started HS when Basically I'm Gay dropped, and watching it-- but I was 13 almost 14, closeted, and while it resonated with me it didn't really hit me that strongly? I remember being most taken aback by the confirmation of their relationship, and the conclusion Dan left about his own sexuality had an impact on me wrt rejecting the constraints of labels, but it didn't really hit me crazily. during hiatus years I watched solo AP semi often but so much was happening... obviously, when the hiatus returned, i came back full force. when it's summer and i can't sleep at night, I watch AP hiatus years solo content; I watched most of the Dystopia Dailys; I saw We're All Doomed's digital release w/ the same best friend I went to TIT with; and obviously, you all have seen me talk about their collaborative content. But after that time, maybe even a bit before the hiatus ended, I rewatched Basically I'm Gay. after all I went through in high school (nothing quite like his experiences, but aspects of it resonated through), that video hit me like a fucking truck-- it made me realize the inherent amount that my queer identity played in my trauma, and it like... made me really emotional lol. also, Phil's openness about his chronic illness has meant a lot especially as I battle with my own-- not chronic illness, but, physical health battles. So when they sang IDGAF it saved me, that was like fucking earth-shattering to me, because they did save me! from when i was 12 years old struggling to do work, wondering why i was so tired every day but at least having them to cheer me up-- to being 19 years old, joints aching and emotionally stressed, watching their pizza mukbang 2 and seeing how much happier they are, how much happier I am. they saved me. and i love them so, so fucking much.
On a very different note, seeing them live has colored my whole, uh, envisioning Dan Howell being trapped in my head in order to cope with my day to day mental isolation, issue, as being like... maybe not the move. so i'm trying to get more used to the quiet of my own head, but hey, over the years, they've helped a lot with that.
I wish i could have met them just to say all these things i'm realizing now, after seeing the show. but TLDR: TIT tysons 2 was the best night of my life. i love them, i love them, i love them, i love them, and i hope they know. i dunno how to move forward with my life after an experience like last night, just, God. i love you dan and phil. i love you phandom. it saved me. TIT saved me.
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mattstromboli · 6 months ago
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Over You- M.S
Warnings: Angst, Crying
Summary: You’re a singer holding a showcase to release a new song. About your ex, Matt, who’s in the crowd listening to you sing about him.
HEAVILY BASED ON OVER YOU BY LANDON BARKER
Matt’s pov
it’s been two months since you and i have seen each other— and two months since the two of us have broken up. you're a singer, and i broke up with you the day before you left for your nationwide tour. tonight you’re preforming an unreleased song, many people came to this concert, and little do you know, that includes me, nick, and chris.
“i just don’t get why i had to come here, she’s—“ i start to complain, but im cut off by chris and nick pointing at the stage, as you begin to speak.
“WELCOME TO THIS SHOWCASE EVERYONE!”
nick and chris cheer at your introduction, while i remain quiet, but still clap. i sit in my seat, watching you intently as you begin to speak
“today is my official bonus show! ill be performing an unreleased song today, and after i sing it, it’ll be released on all streaming platforms!”
i sit up in my seat at your words, looking around me at the hundreds of people around me, i look back at the stage— watching you intently. i see you look over at me shocked, and sad.
”okay- this is gonna take a lot for me to sing, knowing that who i wrote this about is here to hear it. this is kinda my way of admitting to myself that im not over what happened. this song has so much meaning to me and i can’t wait to share it with you all.”
i feel my heart shatter as you mention me, looking over at nick and chris, i see them eyeing me expectingly, while people around me murmur and talk about the song being about me. i remain silent and avoid eye contact, i continue to sit silently as people around me murmur about you noticing me, meanwhile, nick and chris nudge each other and look back at me expectantly
i sit there, listening intently as you talk about the song that you are about to sing, i get butterflies in my stomach, but also a sense of dread, i know that this song is about me, and im not ready to hear what you say
“okay. here we go.”
“I can't get out of my bed, your voice inside of my head
Our favorite song on repeat
I try my best to forget all of the words that you said
Act like it's nothing to me
This happens every time I wish that I could rewind
And end things differently
But, can't bring myself to move on
I miss you now that you're gone
I feel it terminally
Yeah, 'cause I can't help myself
But I'll get over you
Baby, over my dead body
There's nothing I can do
'Cause you were never just somebody
I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go
You leave me broken, black and blue
But I'll get over you
Baby, over my dead body
You're still inside of my blood, I won't be done 'til I'm done
I feel you run through my veins
If I've got air in my lungs, baby, then you're still the one
Nothing comes close to the same
Oh, I still can't help myself
But I'll get over you
Baby, over my dead body
There's nothing I can do
'Cause you were never just somebody
I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go
You leave me broken, black and blue
But I'll get over you
Baby, over my dead body
I can't understand it
I'm turning all the damage into madness over you
Oh, baby, I can't stand it
Feel like nothing worse could happen
And I know it's tragic, but not as bad as losing you
But I'll get over you
Baby, over my dead body
There's nothing I can do
'Cause you were never just somebody
I still remember the highs, the lows, you come, you go
You leave me broken, black and blue
But I'll get over you
If it's the last thing I do.”
my heart breaks further as the words of the song wash over me like a ton of bricks, i listen intently to each word, every single line of the song seems as though it perfectly describes exactly how i’m feeling. every single word of the song perfectly captures the way that i’ve felt these past few months. nick and chris look back at me, expecting some sort of reaction. i see a single tear stream down your face as the song ends and i feel a pit in my gut.
the room is nearly dead silent for a few seconds, before the room erupts in applause, meanwhile, i sit there, shell-shocked. how did you manage to describe exactly how ive been feeling these past few months? I see you erupt into tears as you walk off the stage and my body finally allows me to slowly clap, feeling dead inside.
nick and chris look at each other before looking back at me, i remain silent and just sit in my seat, too stunned to move
Your pov
as i sit backstage crying and listening to ‘over you’ on repeat, i feel my heart shatter piece by piece, knowing that matt was there to witness my song, and my breakdown over him. i watch the outside cameras as matt walks away from the venue with his head down
In a spur of the moment decision, i dial up matt’s number and hit call. the call answers and i can’t bring myself to speak. sobs wrack my body, but no words come out.
“y-y/n?”
“i-i meant it! i meant what i said. im not over you. you weren’t ever just ‘somebody’. please.”
“and i’ll get over you if it’s the last thing i do.”
———————————- THE END
taglist: @sassysturniolo2008 @wompwomp-1 @anna-sturniolo
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jumexju · 9 months ago
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LULLABY
Fic Type !! : angst
CW !! : Gojo fucken dies (thanks a lot gege)
Summary !! : He lied. He didn't come back like he said he would.
Note !! : Yes i'm bitter idc gege needs to apologize for makin me go thru this, this was originally gon be a fluff fic but I just read 237 for myself and well, here we are
✦ MASTERLIST
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OPENING YOUR eyes, you could see his eyes. Bluer than the sea itself, not even the beaches in Okinawa could compare to the beauty his eyes held. And his hair, oh his hair. Softer than the clouds and whiter than the snow. The way his lips were always plush against yours.. How his rough, calloused hands would often cup your cheeks as he kissed your forehead.. He was simply more perfect than perfect was.
"Ya miss me?" He snickered as his strong arms wrapped around you, engulfing you completely in his affection. You immediately hugged him back. With your face buried in his shirt, you could almost smell the detergent you often used when doing laundry.
The softness of the fabric was like no other, you weren't sure if it was because of the fabric itself or because it was Satoru clothed in it. Despite his rigid build, he was always a source of comfort for you, he was always soft to you.
"F'course, there's not a single day I don't miss you." Your words were quiet ー and a little muffled since you were still tightly pressed against him. He pulls away a little, trying to get a better look at you.
"Hey.. you know i'd never leave you." He tries to reassure you as he takes one of his hands off your waist and raises it to cup your cheek. His thumb brushing against your skin.
"..." You didn't say anything back but your grip on his shirt tightened. You rested your forehead against his chest, "You're a bad liar."
At this, he chuckled, bringing you back in for a hug. "You're just an illusion made by my brain to cope with what happened.." You continued. "You're not really here.." Hot tears welled up in your eyes, you could feel them roll down your cheek as you slept, still not daring to let it wake you up.
"That may be true." He spoke, leaning down a little to kiss your forehead reassuringly, "..Maybe in some alternate universe, I'm still here, with you." He smiled.
".. That doesn't help, Satoru," You chuckled sadly as he wiped your tears with his thumb.
"Made ya laugh though didn't I? That's gotta count for somethin'!" He declared cheerfully.
"You always knew how to cheer me up.." Your voice faltered, lips quivering. He pulled you in again, trying to comfort you. You wanted so badly for this to be real. You wanted to wake up next to him, tell him you loved him and see his toothy smile as he told you that you couldn't possibly love him more than he loved you.
"I miss you.." Your body shook as you cried into his shirt, his arms keeping you close.
"I know."
Your eyes burst open, vision cloudy from the tears you'd been crying in your sleep. The covers surrounding you shifted as you sat up, wiping your tears, you felt empty. The heavy feeling of sorrow had become familiar. Grief had made a home in your heart since seeing the horrific sight of Satoru's lifeless body.
It felt like some sick and twisted dream.
At first, you'd been angry. Angry that Sukuna had managed to end the life of the one you loved so much. Angry that no one else stepped in to help, even if you knew logically that they would've only hindered him. Angry that.. you weren't there to see him in his final moments.
Then you were sad. Sad that you would never hear him rant about how the higher-ups were always on his ass. Sad that you wouldn't be able to see the boyish smile he wore so often around you. Sad that you'd never see the loving glint in his eyes whenever he looked at you.
But now.. you were empty.
As empty as his side of the bed now that he was gone. Emptier than the bottomless pit that sat in your stomach, it was unbearable. The weight of his death crushed your heart.
It was uncanny.
To realize that you would never wake up next to him again. You would never get to bicker with him over his unhealthy addiction to sweets. You would never feel his soft lips on yours again. The softness of his hair would never kiss the tips of your fingers.. his warmth would never again be close to you & his eyes would forever remain soulless, never again gazing at you lovingly like he used to.
You didn't have Satoru to comfort you anymore. The spot beside you would always be cold. He wasn't coming back.
Sobs racked your body as you began to cry for the nth time this week and in an attempt to soothe yourself, your encased yourself in your own arms. Your breaths were uneven, your eyes hurt from the endless stream of tears that flowed. Your pained wails ricocheted off the walls of your room.
You were alone.
Totally and undeniably Alone.
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loving-strawberry · 2 years ago
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✶(Reversed)Breaking up prank goes wrong with Stray Kids✶(Maknae-Line)
Hyung-Line Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the other post on my blog!
Summary: You take your boyfriend prank seriously.
It was a request!
A little note: I finally manage to post this one too! I didn't mean to postpone it, but it was necessary. ;^^ Anyway, enjoy reading it! And I also kinda threw Felix under the bus on most of the parts...
Genre: Angst, Fluff. (2 Happy endings, 2 sad endings)
Pairing: Bf!Skz x gn!reader
Warning: lot of swearing, insults, actual break up, mention of cheating and hickeys and bruises(fake ones), mention of being a burden, talking about body insecurities and not being good enough, talking about hate comments, mention of falling out of love, mention of throwing up. Possibly some writing mistakes. I really hope I didn't missed any tw!
Han Jisung☆
He went for this prank when it was the hardest for you and you needed him
And he took the prank on another level
That was it for your relationship
Your boyfriend's behavior was super strange all day today, that making you worried like crazy, on top of everything else you were dealing with, and being pretty unstable emotionally.
You finally got to confront Han about his distance he kept constantly all day long, which is uncharacteristically to this 24/7 clingy man of a boyfriend. And he's literally the biggest support and help you can ask for in every moment of your life. But not today for some reason, when it was one of those days you were feeling drained the most.
Your thoughts were interrupted when you hear a knock on the front door of your house. Taking a deep breath, you reach to your door and opened it, allowing your boyfriend to enter. As he enters, you start feeling sick to your stomach, because he looks and acts nothing like his usual self.
He is usually all smiling and cheerful with all of the occasions he gets seeing you, all the time giving you the biggest and warmest hugs you could possibly ask for, and peppering your face with tons of kisses. Telling you how much he loves you. But right now, he has a cold look on his face, and he says nothing but a small hi, and not even the slightest touches. He just enters your house like he's a total stranger.
"H-Han... My love... What is wrong...? You were all day like this." even if you didn't saw each other, his texts responses were as cold, which caused you anxiety all day.
Sighing, he takes a look at you, before speaking "I'm going to be as quickly as possible. I want to break up with you. I'm not in love with you anymore..." this sends shivers down your spine and your heart drops.
"What...?" your face is drained from every color you had at first, as you are trying your best not to throw up everything you've eaten that day. Every thought possible is crossing your mind now, tears trickling from the corner of your eyes, and you slowly came to the realization "Was I too much of a burden to you, that's why you don't love me anymore, wasn't it? I'm sorry... I knew I should've keep everything to myself. Maybe that way you still loved me..."
If Han didn't regret the prank yet, he does it now. He knows very well about how you feel and how low you can be sometimes but he didn't knew today was one of those day where you needed him and his love the most, not to be met with coldness and distance.
"Oh my god... I'm so sorry... If I knew you were feeling like this, I will not be pulling this prank on you-" he approaches you and take you in his arms, trying to get you to calm down. And you did calmed down, but not because of his hug. More likely because you just shut down completely.
"Playing games with someone's feelings I see. Only if it wasn't in this moment of my life. Maybe then I would've find it funny and laughed." now you are the cold one, pushing him away from you.
"I don't know why exactly I wanted to do the prank... I thought it was going to be funny... I didn't meant to make you feel like this... Is there anything I can do to make up for it?" he's saying it with hope in his eyes, hoping you will forgive his dumb ass and give him another chance. You scoff hearing his words.
"'I thought it was going to be funny'. For who? And yeah. There is something you can do. Get the fuck away from me. I don't want to see you again." you spit every word with so much venom, that if your words were able to kill, he will be dead by now.
Han wants to continue on pleading for forgiveness and asking for another chance. He wants to do better for you again, like he did in the past. But he cannot do it anymore. His words are stuck in his throat. He's too shocked to say anything. Shocked by his own actions. Why did he choose to hurt you like this for fun? This got him sick now. He knows that you are going to do better without him. He always knew that you needed someone better than him. Because even if he knows how hard it is to be emotionally unstable, he still pulled such a prank on you. And not just in a simple, direct way. He went straight up giving you cold shoulder all day long before going to the subject itself. He's no good for you. So he doesn't even try to apologize anymore.
He take one more look at you and his heart broke in an instant when he sees the emotionless eyes before him, which usually are filled with love as they are watching him, but not today. Not anymore. Never again.
Han finally take his leave with that. He regrets everything now. He regrets even thinking about the prank in the first place. He just hopes you will get better soon and move on from him. Allowing yourself to be happy. Allowing yourself to love someone who won't hurt you intentionally with a reckless prank.
Lee Felix☆
Felix sees, Felix does...
Can someone take tik tok away from his hands?
Of course he sees the prank and tries to do it.
Who would think that he, from all of the people, will do it, literally the sunshine
But the sunshine won't shine anymore after this
Seeing this prank all over his tik tok, he is starting to consider doing it on you, just of pure curiosity to see how will you react. He is thinking optimistically and imagining you will recognize it's just a prank and laugh it off.
As he's debating on how to bring this up to you, you just then arrive home, extremely angry and mad because of your work. He doesn't see that you are feeling unwell, as you are usually pretty good at staying calm around other people and smiling like there's nothing going on, which is a bad habit of yours.
"Hey, Lixie." you smile, already feeling much calmer. But your calm state is instantly replaced by an unsettling feeling, as you your boyfriend being all serious and having two fingers on his neck, checking his pulse, being a bit nervous about this prank. "Something bothering you?"
"I... I'm breaking up with you" he avoid looking in your direction and doesn't give you any reason for this sudden action. That's when you come up with the realization that it is one of those tik tok pranks. You already being angry, this just adds more fuel.
"Is there any exact reason for it?" you start questioning Felix, entering his extremely dumb joke.
"W-Well... I-...Um..." he didn't think this through, he doesn't have any reason for breaking up with you. You are literally perfect for him.
"Next time think twice before pulling a hurtful prank." you go in the bedroom and start packing up some of your things, Felix not so far behind you, as he now sees that you were actually in a bad mood and did not want to put up with something like this.
"I just wanted to see how you will react to this prank... I'm sorry... I won't do it again. Please, don't leave me... Please-" he starts pleading for you to stay, but to no avail. You continue packing up the essentials in your bags, before heading towards the front door, in complete silence. This sets Felix into total panic mode. He runs after you and grabs you by the shoulders, spinning you around for you to face him again. "I'm really sorry... Please..."
"No, Yongbok. You fucked up real good with your pranks this time. Oh, and you wanted to see my reaction, right? Well congratulations, you have it. Hope you will enjoy being alone from now on. Goodbye." you snap at him, all of the anger stuck in you all day long finally leaving your body. "I'll send someone to grab the rest of my stuffs in a few days." and with that, you move from his grasps and go out the door, leaving what was your house as well until a second ago.
Felix can't do anything anymore, completely frozen in place. As soon as realization slowly kicks in, he starts sobbing. Falling to his knees as his own legs gave up on him. And his heart aching in so much pain, that it could actually stop any second now.
He doesn't even know what he was expecting at first when he decided to give this prank a go. But he surely didn't expect this. He truly didn't want to hurt you in any way. Felix really thought that you will see it as a silly joke, like you always did with every other pranks. He didn't expect you to react this way, but now that he's thinking about it, you had every right to do so.
He played a game he didn't know it was dangerous and he got you hurt. He should've think the consequences through. Not to think this optimistically about a joke that could potentially hurt a person's feelings.
He fucked up and you have every right to go somewhere better. Somewhere where he couldn't hurt you anymore.
Kim Seungmin☆
He does not want to do this prank at all
But after you came with another prank and he knew it was a prank, he gave it a shot
This relationship is plant based on constant jokes and stupid pranks...
Everyone questioning how you are still together...
Your dearest best friend, Felix, shared you a link to an unharmful prank, the hickey one. And you immediately wanted to put it in practice, being the fact the your amazing ass boyfriend last week replaced your favorite lipstick with glue. The most common prank, but you still somehow fell for it. After being stuck with your lips sealed together for a good 30 minutes a few days ago, you swore to get revenge. This opportunity is perfect. And the perfect timing indeed, because in one hour you were supposed to meet with Seungmin for a date. So you start preparing everything.
After securing the fake hickey in place on your neck with some setting spray and making sure it's not going to smudge easily, you start heading towards your meeting place.
Seungmin was already waiting for you, as you arrived. "Took you long enough." he says teasingly, before hugging you.
"I was late 5 minutes, pup." you kiss his cheek, before heading towards the actual you needed to be. As you two are walking, you make sure to move your hair away from your neck, so the hickey could be seen.
Seungmin spots short after that the bruise on your skin, and he can feel his stomach drop. Stopping both of you from your track, he takes a look at your neck. "What is this?"
"Hm? I burned my skin accidentally with my hair straightener." you say it so innocently, trying to look convincing that you actually cheat on him.
"Hair straightener my ass, you whore!" he gets extremely angry now. "If you think I'm falling for this excuse of yours, you are totally wrong."
You try to say something, to fix this situation, but nothing comes out of your mouth. Too shocked of how your boyfriend got this angry over a prank. You really thought it was going be a small innocent prank, but you are terrible mistaken.
"We are done. Go to whoever left this mark on your neck." turning around, he takes his leave. And you can't do more than just to stand there, all confused and hurt for a good second. Before coming back to your senses and go after him.
"Seungmin! Wait! Please! Let me explain!" you try your best not to break down sobbing, feeling super guilty for hurting your boyfriend like this. To your surprise, Seungmin stops and turns to face you again, rising one eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. "It's a prank... It's just makeup...Please... I'm sorry..."
"I know." he says smirking. "I was just returning your little joke."
You look at him in shock and tears streaming down your face, glad that it was nothing but a prank, but mad at him for scaring you like this. "You scared me so bad! I thought I lost you!"
"You scared me as well for a second when I saw that mark at first. But I know you and I know that you won't do such thing." taking a napkin from his pocket and wiping away the makeup from your neck, he then hugs you to his chest, letting you crying everything out.
"Let's keep on doing little pranks that won't hurt us next time. Ok, my love?" he continues rubbing your back in circles motion, trying to calm you down.
"Yeah... This was too scary..." you manage to calm down and look at Seungmin, giving him a small smile.
He mirrors your expression, having the sweetest smile, the one that is meant just for you to see, the one that is melting your heart everytime. "I love you, dumbass."
"I love you too, Minnie."
Yang Jeongin☆
After this prank, he swears he won't listen to his Hyungs ever again, especially Felix and Lee Know
Felix mentioned randomly the prank, and Lee Know came with the suggestion of I.N to do it with you
And poor Innie just went with it and ended up regretting it.
You have felt insecured about your body. Most likely because of the hate comments you get from Jeongin's "fans" on a daily basis, after your relationship got public. People got jealous and starting hating on you. All of the comments about your body. How you should lose some weight. Or how you aren't beautiful enough for Jeongin, got you pretty fast. And now your mind is in a constant spiral. Are you really good enough for him? Does he really loves you? Will he soon see how ugly actually you are and start being disgusted by you?Will he ever stop loving you?
But to your absolute horror, he payed you an unexpected visit, and starts confirming your biggest fears.
You are just standing now in the living room, looking at your boyfriend, while he starts talking "I think we should break up... I fall out of love with you..."
Every color you had in your face until this point, totally drained and gone now. "It is because of how I look... Right? I wasn't enough for you from the start. Your fans were right... " right now, you are incapable of showing any emotions anymore, feeling numb.
Your boyfriend hates himself now for doing this. He knew he shouldn't listened to his older members from the start, but still ended up doing so. And now everything is aching with guilt and regret. "It was a stupid prank... Felix hyung and Lee Know hyung told me to try it. I'm really sorry for doing it. I was way too stupid and accepted it."
"No... It's ok... I wouldn't blame you if you were going to actually do it. You are way too perfect looking to be seen with someone like me. I don't deserve you." the words that came out of your mouth made Jeongin rush over to you and embrace you in the warmest hug he could ever give. Which is rare for him to initiate physical touch.
"Never say that again! Don't ever listen to anyone who is saying this towards you. You are gorgeous. People are just jealous of your beauty. Beside, you are also the kindest person I know, and the sweetest." you end up crying in his arms, feeling so safe and loved with him. "I'll be with you. Forever. I won't leave you. I love you so much, my beautiful angel."
"I love you too... Thank you... for not actually leaving me."
He smiles softly, as he place a few kisses on top of your head. He's not planning on leaving your side ever, not even as a joke. You are his everything. And will make sure to let anyone who made think so low about yourself know that you are loved by him, doesn't matter how you look.
.............................
✧ Masterlist ✧
✧ Tag List ✧
@bangchansbae @tattywood @nebulousbrainsoup @https-skzology @sp00ky-spr1te
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leysalyn · 5 months ago
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🫧You went to the beach 🫧
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🫧𓇼𓏲*ੈ✩‧₊˚🎐𓆉⋆。˚⋆❀ 🐚🫧𓇼 ˖°*ੈ𓇼𓏲🫧
character :Satoru, Nanami, Choso, Geto
fem!reader
relationship :couple/married
Satoru Gojo
When you arrived at the beach, the first thing he did was take your hand and run closer to the sea and throw you there.
He laughed when he saw your sullen face and then immediately jumped into the sea next to you, once again causing water to splash onto you.
"Sorry, baby. You're just so funny and cute when you're angry." Satoru said and laughed
And all day you fooled around, ran around the sea, mocked and seduced each other.
When the sun began to set, Satoru became a little sad
"mmh...damn. I've waited so long to finally spend time with you, and already the day is ending... I hate it." He pouted like a little boy and crossed his arms
You giggled at his childishness and hugged him.
“Don’t worry, we’ll still have time to have fun at home and on the beach and anywhere else.”
Nanami Kento
The two of you lay on a lounge chair while your 4-year-old daughter ran in the sand and collected shells.
Nanami read a book and sometimes sipped wine, but that doesn’t change the fact that he didn’t keep an eye on his daughter and you sometimes.
Nanami looked at you and sighed. Then he took the hat and put it on your head.
"Sunny, you better take care of yourself, otherwise you might get a sunstroke while lying under the sun." He smiled faintly and kissed her on the cheek
"Okay, I'm just falling asleep a little." You muttered and rubbed your eyes.
“Then maybe it’s better if you lie down next to a tree? There’s just shade there, and you’ll feel better.”
You smiled and shook your head. “No need. I’ll figure it out myself somehow.”
Nanami rolled his eyes and continued reading the book. And a few minutes later your daughter ran up to you with shells
"Mom! Dad! Look what I managed to find here!"
Choso Kamo
He was lying on a sun lounger and looked very tired.
It was you who initiated the trip to the beach, because you were tired of seeing your boyfriend constantly working and not having much time to rest.
"God...baby, can you get me something to drink?" Choso groaned from the fatigue in his body
You nodded and went to find the cold drink counter. And a few minutes later you returned with a drink and gave it to him.
"Mmh...thanks, baby." He smiled at you and started drinking water
You smiled and lay down next to him and rested your head on his chest. Choso placed his hand on your head and stroked it gently.
"maybe we can go swimming?" You looked at him and smiled. Choso thought for a moment and nodded.
"Why not?" He got up from the sun lounger, took you by the hand and you went to the sea, where you started swimming and having fun
Geto Suguru
The two of you lay peacefully under the sun and sunbathed a little and even talked about different topics.
But a couple of minutes after your daughter went into the sea to swim, she came running to you in tears.
"Mom, dad! Something touched my leg in the sea!" Your 5 year old daughter said as she sat on your lap and nuzzled into your chest. Her body was shaking a little from tears and fear.
Geto sighed “Honey, look after your daughter, I’ll go check what’s there.” And after these words he went to the sea
You looked at your daughter and started stroking her head and trying to cheer her up. After a while she calmed down a little and wiped away her tears.
"Are you feeling better, honey?"You asked her, your daughter nodded and hugged your neck.
A few minutes later, Geto returned to you. "As it turned out, it was just algae, honey" Geto laughed and sat down next to you.
"Algae?" Your daughter looked at him and became a little embarrassed.
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itjazzbicch · 1 year ago
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Helping Heal
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Pairing:  Takashi MItsuya x Reader 
Summary: (MANGA SPOILERS SO IF YOU DONT WANT THOSE DON'T CONTINUE)
After Draken is shot and dies of his injuries, Takashi is in a deep depression, locking himself in his room, and the reader, being a close friend, goes to see that he was actually doing something in his room, and comes to help him during this hard time...
Warnings:  Manga spoilers, slight eating disorder? (Mitsuya hadn't eaten because he was sad :'( figured I'd make that a warning, but this ends happily I promise)
Word Count: 1k 
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"Hey, Mitsuya?" I called out softly, knocking on his door softly.
He's been working on his design for the fashion show ever since Draken died. He hasn't left his room according to his siblings Luna and Mana.
Worried wasn't even a good enough word to describe how I felt about him right now. I dropped past his house to check on him, Luna and Mana explained that he had come out of his room for a change, and they were worried because he hasn't eaten anything in a few days.
Before coming back to his room, I went and grabbed him some of his favorite food from his favorite restaurant. Hoping he'd answer the door.
The door creaked softly, his back already turned, but allowing me as he returned to his seat on his bed.
"All done, huh?" I tried to smile, looking to see that he had his work covered up.
"Yeah," He mumbled, not even looking at me.
This was worse than I thought. He was always so lively with me, now it was like he was dead inside.
"Luna and Mana told me you haven't left your room and you haven't been eating," I said softly, shutting the door and coming over with the food I brought him, "So, I went and got your favorite."
"Thanks," Not moving a muscle, this was so hard to watch, but I still set up his food and drink for him on a small fold table he had.
"Cheers?" Holding up my drink, I was hoping I could get him to at least pick something up.
Instead, he stared at me through his bangs before looking down to the floor. I was running out of ideas and so, I sat next to him, hugging him tight whether he wanted a hug or not.
"Just let it out, Takashi," I whispered, fighting tears of my own, "I know you're hurting more than anyone right now. I'm here for you."
Clinging to my jacket, the veins in his hand were popping out from gripping so tight, sniffling before completely breaking down with his face buried in my chest. Hugging him as tightly as I could, I started crying too when he muffled out through tears and a cracking voice:
"I-I; I just can't believe he's g-gone."
"I know," I swallowed, rubbing his back and trying to keep myself together and help him, "But he still lives in here."
Holding my hand over his chest, hoping my words explained themselves, relieved when he nodded and hugged me again, settling down and taking deep breaths, closing his eyes as I cleaned his face with a soft napkin.
"Thank you," He whispered, sitting up and wiping at his eyes while I leaned to him, kissing his temple:
"I always have your back, Takashi. Always."
That made him smile some and it lifted some weight off my shoulders, growing lighter when he pulled the table closer, looking at his food:
"My favorite, hm?"
"Down to the very spices," I smiled at him, relieved as he took a bite, needing it literally for his health, and his soul, showing how much he enjoyed every bite with little expressions on his face.
I only brought myself a snack, but ate alongside him, eyes following his hand as they got his drink:
"I apologize for earlier. Cheers?"
"Oh, you're fine," I assured, taking mine and clanking our glasses softly, "Cheers."
Smiling and taking a sip, we finished up and I decided to clean up while he took a shower and checked on his sisters. Being extra careful, I made sure to put back all his tools away in their labeled spot, as neat as ever, and had his room clean.
All that was left was his final project which was on covered mannequins. I was curious to see, but also wanted to respect the fact that this was Takashi's masterpiece pretty much.
Just staring and zoning out, I jumped at the sound of the door creaking, seeing Takashi coming back in, noticing that I was wanting to see his latest pieces.
"Soon, Y/N. You'll get it see it soon," He winked at me, making me giggle and nod:
"I can't wait. I know you're going to win that whole show."
"Maybe," He hummed, sitting on the floor next to his bed with his brush in hand.
"No maybe's," I rebutted, sitting on the bed above him, stealing his brush and softly brushing through his ends, then through his hair in sections, "You better win or I'm fighting the judges."
Shaking his head and laughing at my comment, he was serious when he explained, "I don't really care if I win or not. I just want to honor him and his memory, our memories. That's all."
Knowing he meant Draken, that made me even more excited. He spent all that time locked in his room, working on a piece to honor him. It made me smile, running a hand through his hair and massaging his scalp, smiling at the dragon tattoo he and Draken had:
"He's gonna be watching, I'm sure, and he'll love it."
Hugging his head and kissing it again, I just wanted to keep all the bad emotions away from him, falling to silence when he tilted his head back to look at me.
His purple eyes glimmered from the light above us, just staring deeply into each other's eyes for a moment, till he tilt his head back a little further, lips perking to find mine.
All my breath left me, lips so soft, but making our kiss so deep, feeling all the appreciation from him, and something else, finding out what it was whenever he parted lips to whisper to me:
"I love you, Y/N."
Staying silent and still, he had to pick up his head and turn to me, arms latching him into a hug when he faced me, on his knees and hugging back with a sway, adding:
"I just wanted you to know that."
"I love you too, Takashi," I squeezed, picking my head up to give another kiss, "You have no idea." 
2023 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome 
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small-oneshots · 12 days ago
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BokuAka
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Warnings -> Angst, Major Character Death
Authors Note -> BokuAka is my OTP, no one can top them. They are so adorable and I love them. They are also SOOO perfect for angst, I don't know why.
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I looked around the table in the back corner of my hometown bar. Friends and family gathered around me in a bittersweet joy. A going-away party. A party that's supposed to be fun, but turns out depressing and miserable. But with my friends, nothing can ever be boring.
Insisting we have it at our bar, Kuroo gathered all of our high school friends, all of my coworkers, and all of my family, into one tiny section. Cheers and beers went round and round the small rectangular table, as well as through the bar, from strangers who over heard.
After about two hours, I left. Calling an Uber, with no destination in mind, I thought about all the times Kuroo and I walked out of this bar, absolutely wasted, trying to find our ways back home. I sometimes wish I could go back, but what would change? I'd still be where I am now.
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The notification popped up on my phone, signaling that I had another customer. At the bar, my back seat door opened and a man sat down. His cheeks were a rosy red, his golden eyes were teary, and his hair was two-toned and messy. Despite all of that, he was one of the most handsome men I've seen in this tiny town.
"Where are you going sir?"
"Would it be okay if we just drove around? With the windows down? It's a nice night and I'm not ready to be alone just yet."
"That's fine with me."
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Akaashi started pulling away and Bokuto rolled the windows down, eager to breathe in the night and forget his destiny.  Arms were seen outside the window as Bokuto became an airplane, flying on the adrenaline and sorrow.  To passerby's Bokuto was drunk and having fun, but Akaashi could see.  He saw the way his body tensed up ever so slightly every time they hit a bump, or the way his eyes always had a tear or two threatening to fall.
"Hey man, I know we don't know each other but, is there anything you want to say?"
Bokuto brought his arms back in and slowly smiled.  It wasn't a smile of joy, but a smile of pain.  The kind of smile one gives when they're trying to convince themselves they'll be okay.
"Have you ever thought about dying?  Or what life is like after you die? Cause I know I do.
"Unfortunately I can say that I have.  Why do you ask?  What's going on?  What's Up?"
"I was diagnosed with brain cancer last week.  They said it's too late to have chemo or even get it treated.  I'm-  Im dying and I'm okay with that."
Akaashi's eyes filled with tears.  His vision became blurry and it got to the point of him having to pull over.
"I was at a going away party with my friends at the bar.  I told them I'm moving away for a job opportunity.  I didn't have the courage to tell them the place was Heaven.
Truth is, I'm a little scared.  Not for myself, but for them.  I wasn't drinking, and I know they sensed something was wrong, but I hope they just thought I was sad about leaving.
That's why I asked you to drive around.  I'm better around people, even if they're strangers.  When I'm by myself I feel lonely and sad.  I don't like feeling like that."
Akaashi was stunned.  At the end of each ride, he asked people if there was something they needed to get off their chest, and he's heard some things.  But nothing- nothing compared to this.
"I'm sorry man.  I didn't mean to go so into detail, but I think this is the happiest I've been since my diagnosis.  The way the night feels on my lungs and skin is breathtaking and the town tonight has such a heavenly glow."
"I agree.  Although it's small, this town really does affect you in the most beautiful ways."
"I know we won't ever see each other after this. but thank you.  Thank you for listening and indulging with me.  It means a lot coming from a stranger, and I really hope it doesn't have to do with the fact that I have cancer.  Even though I'm dying, I'd much rather people be blunt with me, and not beat around the bush."
"You're welcome.  I will let you know, it's not the cancer.  You are a very likable person, and I'll tell you, that you are a very pretty crier.  Your eyes shine like diamonds when you cry, and I find it mesmerizing."
"'Thank you- "
"Keiji.  Akaashi Keiji."
"Kotarou.  Bokuto Kotarou.  Thank you Keiji."
"You're welcome Kotarou.  I'll take you home now.  Just know your not alone.  Not ever."
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Keiji sat, dressed in all black, underneath an umbrella, and cried.  He hasn't known Kotarou at all, but that one might in his car, left such an impact, and Keiji couldn't believe a man like him was gone.  Not two months after they're fateful encounter, Keiji read on the paper that the beloved volleyball player passed away.  They never stated the reason, probably to protect the public from such a sorrowful thing, but Keiji knew.  Keiji remembered how miserable Kotarou felt in his back seat.  He remembered how much it hurt to hear Kotarou's voice crack and see his body tense.  He remembered, despite his horrible odds, how Kotarou looked genuinely happy with his arms out the winter smelling the city. 
It was a cruel fate.  A horrible way to go, and with the way it hurt him, he can't imagine how the family felt. 
"I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss.  I hadn't known Bokuto at all, but I was his Uber driver the night of his "going-away party.  I wanted you guys to know, that he was okay with dying.  He said it himself.  and I want you guys to know, he enjoyed himself that night.  And I want you guys to remember that.  Please, for him."
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unique-high · 1 year ago
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Sunscreen | Mingi x Blk Fem Reader
a/n: wrote this for myself cause I'm a little sad and in my feelings. I discovered this lovely song on Spotify called sunscreen and fell in love with it. lyrics are worked into the fic. sorry for any mistakes.
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With every break-up, it always seemed like it was your fault. Your recent breakup had been no different from the rest. You felt numb when it suddenly ended. You thought of every single thing that could make your ex look like a bad person in your eyes, but he wasn't a bad person at all.
But you needed him to be.
When people ask you why it ended, you'd shrug, saying, "I don't know." because you really didn't know.
One minute he was here talking about marriage and how he would cry when you walked down the aisle. And the next he's storming through your apartment collecting his things, shoving them into his duffle bag, saying how he couldn't do this anymore. All you could do was cry and beg him not to go. He still left.
Now it's 2 am. You're in your bathroom listening to Erykah Badu while drinking warm red wine from a paper cup. You stare at your hair clippers, turning them on and then cutting your hair. It was freeing in a way you always did this after every breakup. Making you feel less light, but that numbness will still linger for about two more weeks, maybe even months.
So you move through your life without ever really thinking of your ex until something suddenly reminds you of him all over again. Like how when you hear his favorite song that you two would sing while drunk late into the night or when you run into some of his friends and you try your hardest not to ask them how he is doing.
These days were always a little harder.
After when you thought it was okay to actually move on, you get dressed up. Put on your favorite red lipstick and your favorite perfume.
The singles mixer was at a karaoke bar. You signed your name getting a sticker that read: ‘Hello, I'm Y/n’.
You smooth the sticker on to your black Chanel blouse while you order a drink. There were some people already up on stage singing some Taylor Swift song that you heard one time at the grocery store. Cruel summer.
Once you had your drink, you sit back watching everyone as they talk. Remember, you came here to have fun, and meet someone new.
From across the room, you see a guy walk in. He's awkwardly smiling, greeting anyone who walks by him. He slaps on his sticker and you squint your eyes in the dimly lit karaoke room to see his name tag. But all you could make out was ‘Min’
He slid down beside you. You pretend not to notice him. He leans towards you spooking you.
“Y/n's a cute name.” He says with a smile.
With the brim of your glass to your lips, you mutter, “Thank you.”
You glanced at his name sticker. ‘Hello, I'm Mingi.’
The host of the mixer came around encouraging those who were just sitting to get up and have fun. Mingi holds a mic for you. You stare at it before shaking your head.
“I can't really sing.” You say.
“Karaoke is not about how good you can sing. It's about having fun. Sing with me, please?”
So you take the mic. Go up on stage with Mingi. The song Mingi picked was The Black Eyed Peas My Humps. Mingi sings and dances on stage. Everyone was cheering him on. He grabs your hand getting you to dance a little. You're hesitant to sing at first but you sing having fun, but when Mingi twerks, you burst into laughter midway through the song.
You just met the guy and you couldn't help but imagine yourself with him. And it felt nice.
I want someone to remind me to wear sunscreen. And take my vitamins when it slips my mind.
You could imagine Mingi peeking his head out of your bathroom, toothbrush in his mouth as he reminds you to not forget to put on sunscreen and to take your vitamins as you're rushing about the kitchen trying to grab your tea mug, keys, and bag so you could head the door.
I want someone who knows how I like my coffee and wants to share a bed from morning to night.
Then you couldn't help but imagine him in your kitchen early in the morning, with messy brown hair and shirtless. He would know how you liked your coffee in the mornings. It would take him a week to get it right and when he does, it's worth seeing your smile and telling him he tastes like heaven. Then Saturdays would be your favorite again. Mingi would want to sleep in with you on his days off. And on the days he comes to your place late after work, sharing your bed at night with you would become his favorite thing.
“I would like to get to know you more,” Mingi says as the two of you walk off the stage. At first, you didn't know what to say, too scared that if Mingi eventually knew the real you, he'll be gone too.
But I'm stubborn. Selfish. Easily Jealous at times.
It's hard being you. Now you start to see why things never worked out with anyone else. You were just being yourself. What's a relationship when you couldn't be your true self? So what if you're stubborn? You've been that way since you were five. Selfish. Because you're the eldest daughter who had to be a parent to your younger siblings when your mother didn't feel like being a mother. Being easily Jealous comes from the time in 11th grade when your ex-best friend was far prettier than you, and got all the boys. These things made you into who you were.
I'm hard to love and I just want someone to try.
Of course, you weren't the easiest person on earth to love. But you think that came from your father. You tried your best to make your love easy, to make it comfortable for others to want to lean into. It was the opposite, though. At the end of the day, all you wanted was someone who would try. That's all you ask for.
You let Mingi in a little that night at the mixer. What could it hurt? The worst that could happen is you're crying into your pillow a couple months from now because he breaks up with you.
Ending up in your bed naked by the end of the night with Mingi wasn't supposed to happen, but it did. You'll regret it in the morning when he sneaks out while you're still asleep. So right now, while he's sleeping, you stare at him, counting how many breaths he takes.
By morning, you're a little groggy. You didn't expect to be pulled into Mingi's naked body. He's still here.
I want someone who knows that I'm not made for mornings and doesn't scold me for smoking when I drink.
Mingi doesn't try to pull you out of bed with the talk of breakfast and getting your day started early. Mornings weren't meant for you. And he somehow knew that. By the afternoon, Mingi is still at your place. He's wearing a pair of your sweat pants that go above his ankles. You make lunch for the two of you. Sometimes you like having a smoke during this time of day with a drink. Mingi isn't bothered by it. He doesn't try to scold you telling you how bad for your health it is. He doesn't know you to tell you what's good or bad for you. You liked that, though.
I want someone who can ground me when I'm too high. Light up the dark side of my head.
There were days when you floated on the surface of your mind, not really here, you functioned like you were on autopilot most days. It's been two weeks now. You knew Mingi's last name and all his favorite things. He spends nights at your place on the weekends. He noticed you weren't being yourself, he'd stroke your back, speaking to you softly. Sometimes being in your head all the time makes you depressed. Because you would find your ex still lingering there. Mingi sits and listens to you talk about your ex.
"I want to hate him, Mingi. But my heart won't let me."
Mingi kissed the top of your head. He understood what you were going through he's been here before too.
"Sometimes it takes a while for our hearts to want to let go. It's normal. You just haven't had the time to grieve for the loss of your relationship with your person."
He knew it was going to take you some time to heal and he was willing to wait to for you.
I want someone to share my coffee and sunscreen. My mornings, my stories and my bed.
Two weeks with Mingi turned into two months. He moved into your apartment. His toothbrush had a permanent spot next to yours. You had someone to share coffee with in the evenings. Sharing your sunscreen with Mingi became a daily thing.
You told Mingi all your stories from like the time you were ten and your pet cat Frankie brought you a dead mice, and how you when turned thirteen and your mom forget your birthday and tried to make it up to you by giving you a hostess chocolate cupcake she got from the gas station.
And lazy Sundays cuddled up with Mingi felt nicer than anything in the world. You liked having someone to share your bed with again. Mingi got comfortable with you in a sense he knew you better than your ex had.
Mingi tried with you.
That's all you ever wanted from someone was to try.
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