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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 6 months ago

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All In 2

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power imbalance, low self esteem, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you meet a mysterious man on a night out with your sister. (petite!reader)

based on the winning option for this poll

Characters: casino owner!Bucky Barnes

Note: told myself to slow down, didn’t.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You finish your cocktail before you go into the concert hall. Roxie grabs a third and you pass, not wanting to run back and forth to the bathroom. Besides, you don’t really like the way the vodka stirs in your stomach and little behind your eyes.

The band is decent. You don’t know any of the songs and only vaguely heard of the artist they are a tribute to. Still, you enjoy the live show; you focus on their instruments and how they use them. You always wanted to be musical but never had a sense of tone or melody.

By the end of the set, you’re yawning. Your sister is on her fourth drink and you can’t tell if she’s swaying to the music or if it’s more than that. As the rows empty, you shuffle out with the rest of the concert goers. The bright lights of the casino greet your squint and your ears pulse slightly from the noise of the strumming and crashing show.

“Mm, so, what’d’ya say?” Your sister makes almost every word into one, “how do we spend this?”

She fishes out the chip and you give a sheepish frown. You almost forgot about it. You still think you should turn it in. You don’t feel right spending someone else’s money. You do that often enough, much too old to be living off your mom.

“Don’t be boring,” she warns, “jeez. It’s just cards. Odds are, whoever dropped it, would’ve lost it to the house anyway.”

She claps her hand around your shoulder. You pull back the sleeve of your cardigan to check the time. It’s after ten! You haven’t been out that late since... ever.

“I’m not boring,” you cross your arms and shrug her off. “I just... am different than you.”

“Boring,” she repeats. “You can’t spend all day in your room.”

Yes, you can. And you do.

You don’t argue. When she’s like this, it’s only bound to become a scene. There are too many strangers around for that.

“Black jack,” she declares and spins the coin. It slips from her grasp and falls between her feet. She bends over shamelessly in her dress to pluck it up. “Come on, let’s clean up.”

She struts ahead and you shuffle after her, nervously wringing the strap of your purse. Hopefully she loses it quickly and you can just retreat home in defeat. You catch up to her as she reaches the stairs. She giggles as she leans on the railing and you take her other arm, trying to support her wobbly steps.

“Want another drink?” She asks.

“No, think we’re good.”

“We?” She scoffs, “I’m fine.”

“Please, Rox, let’s just find a table,” you peek around as her voice rises a bit louder than you like.

“Pfft, fine, but if I win, I'm getting a drink.”

You nod. Go along to get along. That’s what your mother always told you when it came to your sister. She’s more like your father than she cares to admit.

You get to a table and she sits easily on the high seat of the tall stool. She lays down the single chip and the dealer offers to break it into smaller ones. She nods and shrugs. You envy how smoothly she just breezes through things.

You stand behind her. You don’t want to take up a seat and the stool is too much of a climb for you. You can see it wobbling as you attempt to hitch yourself up with the crossbar. You’re good, you shouldn’t get comfortable.

You listen to the shuffle of cards as your sister murmurs something you can’t make out. You can only hear the low drone of voices as you stand back. You sidle out of the way as a man claims the empty stool beside your sister. He buys in and another hand is dealt. Hasn’t she lost yet?

The man leans into your sister and you grimace. She turns her head to listen to him and she giggles. Your cheeks blaze hotly and you cross your arms and rock. Neither seem to notice you as they get closer and closer.

As the game progresses, you can only really make out what the dealer says; the different numbers that have grumbles coming from other players. You bring your hand up to pick at the button on your cardigan. The man puts his arm around your sister’s back, his hand on her hip as wiggles in her seat coyly. What about Tom?

You peer around awkwardly. Do you stop her? Remind her of the boyfriend that got her the tickets for tonight? You bounce in your flats and pause as you find someone else staring back at you. Or are they? Just as quickly as your eyes meet, the stranger’s eyes flit away and he’s back to chatting with another man. It’s the very same man who gave you the chip. Maybe her forgot you. That’s not a surprise.

You return your attention to your sister. The man has moved his arm between them and your sister squirms. You watch his elbow as he pulls his hand back. He’s touching her leg. She’s wiggling and suddenly, she shoves him away and screeches.

“EH! I got a boyfriend, perv! I said stop.”

Her voice carries along the high ceilings and you cringe. You back up, cowering away as she stands and the stool teeters dangerously. She fists her hand and you think for a moment she might just hit the guy. He scoffs and turns in his seat.

“Babe, just wanted to buy you a drink.”

“Whatever. You fucking creep!” She hollers.

“Ma’am,” the dealer calls from the table, “is there a problem?”

“Y-yeah,” she hiccups, “this dude had his hand up my skirt.”

“She’s drunk,” the man shakes his head, “listen to her.”

“I’m--” your sister’s denial catches in her throat, “doesn’t mean he can just touch me.”

“Ma’am, if you’re drunk, we’re going to have to ask you to leave.”

“I’m fine. I'm not that...” She slides off the stool and stands, grabbing the chips in front of her seat and tossing them across the table. “You’re all a bunch of crooks.”

Her ankles tangle as she spins and she barely gets her balance before she storms away. Her strides are uneven as she bobbles drunkenly. You watch after her with wide eyes before you follow. She leads you into the bathrooms as she growls and grumbles. She slams into a stall and you stand outside.

You wait until she comes out. She’s quieter and her eyes are hazy. She washes her hands and applies a new coat of lip gloss.

“What a bust,” she pouts and rolls her eyes, “one more drink and we’ll go.”

“Maybe we should just leave now.”

“That guy was such a pervert,” she sneers at you, “you saw where his hand was.”

You nod, “yeah, I did...”

“So, you know I wasn’t being dramatic.”

“Yeah, but... everyone heard.”

“Oh fuck off,” she pushes your shoulder and stomps past you.

You feel bad. It’s not that she shouldn’t defend herself. You admire that she can, but she didn’t need to be so obnoxious. You trail after her into the casino. She heads directly for the bar. You hang your head and wait behind her. This time, she doesn’t offer you a drink. She’s mad at you now so it’s the silent treatment.

“Honey,” another man approaches, “how about I get that for you?”

“Huh?” She babbles, “oh, sure, baby, that’s sweet.”

The man offers his card to the bartender and orders a highball. He leans his arm on the tall bar top as he faces your sister. She bats her lashes at him and giggles as she pulls her drink closer.

“What’s your name, gorgeous?” He asks.

You blink. It’s like you’re not even there. You watch awkwardly, wishing the floor would swallow you up. Instead, you find an empty stool one seat away.

“Roxie,” she answers as you struggle up onto the seat. “And you, handsome?”

“Sam,” he returns, “what’re you drinking then?”

You notice him touch her glass along the brim but can’t see much else around your sister. She replies and his own drink is served. You shrink down and sigh. She’ll get her free drink and then you can just leave. You hope. You hold your chin as you dread another scene.

“Can I get ya something?” The bartender approaches.

“Er, water, please,” you choke out. He seems disappointed but gets you a glass.

You try not to overhear your sister and that man. It’s awkward and you hate this. It’s not the first time she’s done it either. The few times she’s brought you along, you’ve somehow become a third wheel. It reminds you of when you were kids and your mom forced her to take you with her somewhere. She doesn’t actually want you around, she’s genetically obligated.

“Woah, baby, you okay?” The man raises his voice and your sister’s body slumps. Shoot. No.

You barely get off the stool as the man clings to her drooping body. She giggles wildly as you tweak your ankle and rush over. That man, Sam he called himself, seems somewhat calm given the situation.

“Slow down, babe,” he chortles, “Jesus.”

She’s drunk. You knew she shouldn’t have had another drink. Your eyes meet Sam’s and he squints.

“You know her?”

“My sister,” you murmur.

“Oh, right, well...” he clears his throat and looks around, “you can take care of her then.”

“Wait--” you barely keep her up as she leans on you as she’s almost sideways on the stool.

He’s just leaving you? What the heck? You guess if he can’t get anything out of her, she isn’t worth the effort.

You sniff and struggle to slide your sister down to her feet. She’s heavier than you expect and her height makes her difficult to balance. You glance over as the bartender nears.

“Everything okay?” He asks sternly.

“We’re leaving,” you assure him, “sorry.”

“Five minutes,” he taps his watch face, “or I call security.”

You nod and move your arm around your sister’s back, “please, Rox, gotta work with me.”

She laughs again, “hey, where’d that cute guy go?”

“Please,” you beg again, “don’t...”

“Oh, hi,” she touches your faces and squeezes your cheeks, “baby sister.”

You hate when she’s like this. She’s always been a drinker, ever since high school when her friends would sneak out bottle from their parents’ stash. What was once an act of rebellion as a teen is now concerning as an adult.

“Excuse me, everything okay?” The timbre makes your heart drop and you nearly let go of Roxie as she leans in the other direction.

You look up. Oh god. It’s him. That dark-haired man in his expensive suit.

“I’m just... we’re on our way out--”

“She alright?” He points at your sister.

“Tipsy,” you utter.

“I see,” he pushes his hair back as it slips forward, “can I help?”

“Uh, you don’t--”

Before you can answer, he has your sister’s other arm. He almost lifts her entire weight off of you as he supports her against his shoulder. Your entire body is emblazoned in humiliation. You refuse to look above the floor as you’re certain you must have an audience.

You get your sister across the floor and into a hallway. There's an exit sign ahead but you're all turned around. The man stops you and Roxie.

"Where'd you park?" He asks, "this leads to Lot 5."

"Oh, uh..." you blanch. You hadn't thought of any of that. You slouch under Roxie's weight and try to see around her. "I'm not sure but... I don't drive. She was supposed to."

"Ah," he clucks, "and now she can't."

"Right," you agree glumly, "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? Why?" He asks.

"I didn't think... I let her--"

"Did you let her drink or did she make that choice knowing she was supposed to get behind a wheel?" He challenges.

"I guess... yeah. Sorry."

"Really, doll, no need to keep going on like that," he dismisses, "well, it's late and I can't in good conscience let you wander out with her like this. Especially if you don't have a way home."

"I could..." you begin. A taxi? You'd have to ask your mom to pay the driver when you get home. "Why would you... care?"

"Well, as the owner of this establishment, it won't look good on me if two pretty girls left and went missing," he chuckles then stops himself, "sorry, that's not funny. I just... we overserved your sister obviously so it's on us."

"Owner?" You gulp. You didn't think this could be any more humiliating.

"Bucky," he reaches around you sister.

You hesitate. You can't shake his hand properly as yours is around your sister so you just sorta grab his hand briefly and squeeze two fingers, retracting with another raze of embarrasment. You barely squeak out your name.

He repeats your name before he continues, "I'll get you two a room so she can sober up."

"What? No. That's... too much."

"It's late," he insists, "here," he pulls Roxie away from you as her head lolls and she snorts. He lifts her against his chest, carrying her easily. "I know a back way, just follow my lead, doll."

"Ummmmm," you drone and he waltzes back the way he came, hardly detered by the drunken body in his arms. You can only kick yourself and scramble after him. This night could not have ended any worse. Well, you guess it could if it went the way he suggested.

#bucky barnes #dark bucky barnes #dark!bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #series #all in #au #casino au #marvel #mcu #avengers #captain america #winter soldier

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the-fiction-witch · 4 months ago

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Little Lady

Media - House Of The Dragon Character - Jacaerys Velaryon Couple - Jacaerys X Reader Reader - (OC) Lady Melimina (Betrothal) Rating - Sexy Word Count - 3435

Jace lingered on the balcony of his chamber in dragonstone watching as vermax flew around the castle restlessly. He felt angry, so trapped here on dragonstone while the war wages, his mother refused him to go and broker alliances, she refused him to fight, even to fly vermax. She said it wasn't safe. That he was her heir and he needed to be safe... He felt like a coddled princeling. To stand at home with mommy while a war for his family, his claim went on within him. He leaned his back against the stone wall behind him feeling the coldness of the hard stone against his body, a sudden wave of frustration took over him. Being confined on Dragonstone felt like a death sentence. Jacaerys looked up in the sky watching Vermax fly in circles around the castle. It was like he knew what he was going through.

"My prince?" the sound of footsteps come out to the balcony, and his betrothal lady Melimina appeared in her black gown with red pattern in the fabric with a dragon pin at her waist to secure it on her body. She nervously stepped out but kept her distance, "Is something troubling you?

He looked down at her, his eyes piercing into her own gaze and noticed that she kept her distance as if she was afraid of coming closer to him. "It seems like you already know the answer to that" he said before looking back at the sky watching Vermax fly around.

She nodded "She only wishes to protect you My prince." She said softly, "you are her heir, her future. The targaryen future, the Velaryon future, so much rests on you... And ... After what happened… to lucerys" she said tenderly

He exhaled loudly as he heard her speak the name of his younger brother. The memories of that day still fresh and painful as if it had happened yesterday. "I know that, but she doesn't have to keep me on a leash and shut me away in this place. I can fight, I can-" he looked down at his feet clenching his fists before continuing "...I can do more than she thinks."

"I'm sure you can," she nodded trembling slightly at the sight of his fists "but... Patience, is a great thing for the future king also?" She encouraged

His breath grew heavy, anger and disappointment coursing through his veins as he realized how right she was. Being patient was definitely a virtue. He unclenched his fists and took in a deep breath before looking back into her eyes. "You're right." he exhaled as he leaned his back against the wall once again "I'm just tired of this... waiting around while the others fight out there. I want to be a part of this war too."

"And you sit on your mother's council, beside her every discussion of movements and tactics. She is teaching you to lead. I know it's frustrating... And I... I wish I could help"

He chuckled faintly at her comment. A part of him felt a sense of comfort in knowing that she was trying to understand him, trying to help. Even if it might be just a little. He looked down and then at her again, the tension in his body starting to ease as he spoke. "Your presence alone is enough, Melimina. Having you talk to me is help, I suppose. I'd go insane if I stayed here by myself."

She blushed "thank you my prince,"

A small, soft smile appeared on his lips noticing her gentle blush. "There's no need to thank me." he spoke in a low, soft tone. His eyes lingered on her form, taking in every detail. From the way her black dress hugged her to the small dragon pin resting at her waist.

"... I have heard word of discussions to meet with the tullys of riverrun and the freys of the crossing... Your mother had suggested I go" she explained

He raised an eyebrow, a flicker of curiosity in his eyes. "The Tullys and the Freys?" he repeated, processing the information. "And she suggested you go? I wonder why..." he said, a hint of suspicion in his voice

"... My grandmother was a Tully, my prince"

He looked at her with a bit of surprise, the pieces coming together in his mind. "I see... you have family there, then. I suppose that's why my mother thought it a good idea for you to go."

"... Perhaps, if you wish I could ask her to send you instead?"

His gaze snapped back to her, a flicker of hope appearing in his eyes. The thought of leaving Dragonstone filled him with a renewed energy, and he couldn't conceal the excitement on his face as he replied "I... I would appreciate that, Melimina, truly. It would mean a lot if I could go instead."

"... And perhaps," She blushed "... Maybe we might... Go together?" She suggested nervously

His eyes widened at her suggestion, a mixture of surprise and interest crossing his face. The thought of going away with her, together... the idea was both exciting and nerve-wracking. "Together?" he repeated, the words leaving his mouth slowly as if to savor the idea "I... I wouldn't mind that."

"perhaps two dragons could be more persuasive then one. And perhaps the... Royal heir and his... Future wife... The potential future king and queen may... Inspire some alliance?" She struggled not to giggle

The corners of his mouth tugged upwards into a faint smile at her suggestion. The thought of using their status and future titles to inspire loyalty and gain alliances... it was a strategically smart move. But there was more to it than that. It would be a chance for them to get closer, to spend time together away from the confines of Dragonstone, "You're quite clever, Melimina. And you're right again... two dragons are definitely more persuasive than one."

she blushed and nodded "I will put it to her at the council in the morning,"

He smiled and nodded in agreement, a wave of anticipation and excitement coursing through him at the prospect of potentially going on this journey. It was the first time in a long while that he looked forward to something. "I'll be looking forward to that council then. Thank you, Melimina. For considering it, for helping me..." he said genuinely, his expression turning into a soft and warm gaze.

"your welcome, of course I want to help... It ....breaks my heart to see you upset," she explained "and..." She chuckled looking out to vermax still circling, "I know starlight hates to see vermax so stressed,"

He laughed softly, gazing alongside her at Vermax still flying around the castle. The mention of Starlight, Melimina's own dragon, being worried about his own dragon brought a lighthearted moment to their conversation. "Ah, yes, Starlight... she's as perceptive as her owner it seems. We can't have our dragons worried about us too, can we?" he replied, looking back at her with a lighter, more relaxed expression.

"no, they should be down on the caves... Relaxing together" she cooed

His eyes widened at the idea. The thought of their dragons interacting and relaxing together was a cute and endearing image that brought a soft smile to his lips. "Relaxing together, huh? I like the sound of that. Vermax and Starlight... maybe they're already in love like their riders," he teased, his voice playful and lighthearted.

"I've caught them cuddling" she blushed

He was taken aback by the revelation and laughed incredulously. "Cuddling? You're serious?" he asked, his eyebrows raised, unable to believe that their dragons were in a more intimate relationship than they were. A hint of jealousy tugged at him, but he quickly dismissed it as he replied with a chuckle. "I never thought I'd feel outdone by my own dragon"

"out done my prince?"

He chuckled softly and looked back at her, a hint of playful competitiveness in his eyes. "Yes, outdone. Sounds like Vermax and Starlight have a more intimate relationship than we do..” he teased, his voice gentle but with a hint of suggestion.

she blushed "perhaps they do... But their dragons they don't have .. the rules and regulations we do"

He smirked, amused by her reaction and the point she made. He took a step closer, closing the distance between them slightly. "Ah, yes. The rules and regulations... such pesky things, aren't they? They keep us in line, make sure we behave." he said, his voice dropped to a lower, more intimate tone. He continued closing the distance between them little by little, the proximity creating a charged atmosphere that heightened the tension between them. He gazed at her intently, his eyes studying her every feature with a mixture of desire and restraint. "But rules and regulations... They also make things more interesting, don't you think? It adds a bit of... excitement. The thrill of breaking the rules... the forbidden."

she Blushed hard looking out to vermax and the waves, "makes me wonder if you'll have interest in me... When not forbidden fruit"

His gaze followed hers to look out at Vermax and the waves for a moment, his mind momentarily distracted. But then, he looked back at her, his eyes filled with a mixture of intensity and tenderness. "Ah, so you worry that once the thrill of the forbidden is gone, my interest in you might waver?" he asked, his voice smooth and low, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"it does ... Worry me" she admits fiddling with her fingers

He noticed her fiddling with her fingers, a sure sign of her nerves and concern. He stepped even closer, close enough that their bodies were almost touching. "I can assure you," he replied softly, his voice gentle and sincere, "that my interest in you goes beyond the thrill of the forbidden, Melimina. You are more than that to me... and you will continue to be, even when the 'forbidden' is gone."

"... It is another reason I hate this war so very much"

He raised an eyebrow curiously, silently asking her to elaborate on her statement. He listened intently, his body still close to hers as he waited for her to continue.

"if not for the war... We... We'd have been married by now"

His expression softened, his mind going back to the original plan and timeline. If not for the war, if everything had gone in their favor... they would indeed be married by now and ruling from the Iron Throne. "Yes, we would..." he said quietly, his voice laced with a hint of longing and disappointment. He took a step back, his gaze drifting away from her towards the horizon, his mind momentarily lost in thought.

"your mother would be queen. You'd be her heir. I'd be your ... Princess. We might have even had a child on the way by now. You'd be prince jacaerys Velaryon of dragonstone, heir to the iron throne."

Each word she said was like a stab to the heart, a reminder of the potential future that could have been. He had imagined that future too, countless times, and now it felt like it was slipping further and further away. "I know..." he said quietly, his voice tinged with a hint of sadness. He turned his gaze back to her, his eyes full of melancholy and longing. "That was the plan... that was how it was supposed to be."

"well..." She sighed "then we must end this war quickly, so things can be as they should"

He nodded in agreement, the determination in her words reigniting a fire within him. He looked at her with renewed resolve, his features hardening. "You're right," he said firmly, "we need to end this war as soon as possible. I won't rest until everything is how it should be again. Until my mother is queen and I am her heir as intended." He then stepped closer to her again, his eyes locked onto hers. This time, the distance between them seemed even more significant. Their bodies were almost touching, their proximity creating a charged atmosphere that was both electrifying and dangerous. "Melimina," he spoke softly, his voice low and laced with a hint of a promise, "I swear to you that I will do whatever it takes to make our future a reality. No matter the cost, no matter the sacrifices..."

"as honourable as that is my prince, I'd prefer you just... Be safe and well by the end. The crown makes no matter to me"

Her words made him pause, a wave of warmth and gratitude washed over him. Her concern for his safety and well-being was not something he was used to. He was the prince, expected to risk life and limb for his ambitions, but hearing her prioritize his safety over the crown made him feel a strange mixture of emotions. "You... you are a rare one, Melimina," he said quietly, his voice tinged with admiration and affection. "Most people in our world would prioritize their own gain and power above all else."

"... I'd be happy… in a little stone cottage with a waterwheel, in the river lands with you. Then all of westeros under my throne and a crown on my head without you"

He was taken aback by her words. The simplicity and sincerity of her statement struck him deeply. It was such an unexpected and yet touching notion. "A stone cottage with a waterwheel in the riverlands..." he repeated thoughtfully, his gaze lingering on her. Her preference for a simpler life with him over a grand throne and crown, it was almost too good to be true. He reached out and lightly touched her arm, his fingers gently brushing against her skin as if he couldn't quite believe she was real. "You truly mean that, don't you?" he asked quietly, his voice tinged with disbelief and awe. "You would give up the throne, the crown, everything... just to have a simple life with me?"

"I would. Just somewhere safe, and cosy. Somewhere to raise little children, and... Have vermax and starlight snuggle in the barn together" she giggled brushing her fingers against his but to afraid to touch him quickly moving her hands to her stomach to fiddle with her fingers once more

He chuckled as she described the image of their future life, his imagination running wild. The thought of a quiet, peaceful life with her and their dragons... it was an enticing prospect. His eyes fixated on hers, watching the nervous fiddling and the almost-touch of their hands. "A cosy cottage... Starlight and Verax in the barn... little children running about..." he mused. "It sounds like an idyllic life, almost too good to be true."

"umm, waking by dawn, pressing apples with the waterwheel, feeding chickens, watching the children run, the dragons snuggling and .. having eggs to place in our own babies cradle... Fishing and farming and..." She Blushed but Giggled stopping herself

His lips curled into a small smile as he listened to her daydream. Her descriptions of their simple life painted a vivid picture in his mind, one that was almost too perfect. "And what else, Melimina?" he asked, her sudden pause piquing his curiosity. He watched her blush and giggle, knowing there was more to her fantasy than she was letting on.

"it's foolish" she blushed

His smile widened slightly as he noticed her blushing. He took a step closer, intrigued now by what she was hiding. "No, please tell me. I want to know what else you imagine. It's not foolish," he said softly, his voice reassuring and encouraging.

"... I... Imagined ... Looking out the cottage window while making a nice chicken stew, watching the children play with their baby dragons, vermax and starlight flying across the sky hunting sheep, and... You... Walking out in the summer sun ... Shirtless to chop wood for the fire" she Blushed her fingers fiddling with her dragon pin on her dress unable to meet his eyes she was so embarrassed

His eyes widened slightly at her words, a mixture of surprise and amusement on his face. The image she painted was undeniably captivating, and the thought of being the shirtless, wood-chopping, dragon-riding husband in her dream made him feel oddly proud. "Ah... I see," he said, his voice low and tinged with a hint of amusement. He took another step closer, his body almost touching hers now. He reached out and gently took her chin, tilting her head up so she would meet his gaze.

"forgive me I-"

He shook his head, his eyes fixed on hers, gently silencing her with a soft brush of his thumb against her chin. "Don't apologize," he said softly in a low voice, the warmth of his touch sending a shiver down her spine. "I... I find it endearing, actually. The image of me as a shirtless, wood-chopping dragon rider, tending to our children and their baby dragons while you make a stew." He chuckled again, his smile still evident in his voice. His hand moved upwards, his fingers caressing her jawline gently. He was now so close to her that he could feel the warmth of her breath, her eyes staring up at him nervously. "It's a beautiful dream, I'll give you that..." he said huskily, his eyes darkened with a mix of desire and affection. His other hand moved to her hip, pulling her slightly closer to him

"but... It is only a dream. We are to rule.. as king and queen someday"

He chuckled wryly, his eyes never leaving hers. He gently tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, his fingers lingering on her cheek for a moment. "True... we are destined for greatness. But it doesn't mean we can't have brief moments to indulge in our little fantasies, does it?" His hand on her hip pulled her even closer, their bodies now almost pressed together, his touch firm yet tender. He leaned in, his voice dropping to a low, intimate whisper. "Imagine it..." he murmured, his breath hot against her skin. "Me, coming in all hot and sweaty from chopping wood. You, finishing up your chicken stew. Our children and their dragons playing around us, the dragons cuddling in the corner..." His hand on her hip tightened, pulling her flush against him. He leaned down, his mouth hovering just millimeters away from hers, his lips almost touching hers as he continued

she giggled and blushed even harder at the thought

His lips curled into a smile, his eyes darkened with desire as he watched her giggle and blush. He was enjoying this game of theirs, the way she was reacting to his words and his touch. "And after we've had our dinner, I'd take you by the fireplace..." he said huskily, his mouth still close to hers, their faces almost touching. "I'd hold you in my arms, the fire casting shadows on our skin as I kiss your neck, your jaw, your collarbone..." His hand on her hip moved lower, his fingers tracing the curve of her body, his touch sending shudders through her as he continued to describe their fantasy. "I'd kiss you until you're breathless, until you're craving me, until you're begging for me..." he murmured, his lips now tantalizingly close to her ear, his voice low and full of promise.

she giggled again "... I do hope you've put the children to bed before all this"

He let out a soft laugh, his breath warm on her skin. He pulled back slightly, admiring her flushed cheeks and wide eyes. "Oh, I definitely have..." he said, his voice low and seductive. "The little ones are asleep in their beds, dreaming of their baby dragons and tomorrow's adventures. We're all alone in the cozy cottage by the fire..." his hand on her hip moved lower again, gently caressing the curve of her ass.

"ooh-" she gasped glancing at his hands red blush across her cheeks and nose

He chuckled again, noticing the way her eyes darted to his hands. He continued caressing her ass, his fingers tracing lazy circles over the fabric of her dress, his touch firmer now, more possessive. "Are you enjoying these little... fantasies?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. He pulled her even closer, his body now pressing snuggly against hers, their hips touching, his lips ghosting over her jawline.

she nodded "we uhh we should... We shouldn't -"

"We shouldn't..." he repeated, mimicking her tone, knowing full well they should stop. His lips traced a path from her jawline down her neck, to her collarbone. "But do we really want to stop?" His hand on her ass pulled her even closer, his body fully pressed against hers now, leaving no space between them at all. He started gently nipping at her skin, trailing kisses along her shoulder and collarbone, enjoying the way she shivered at his touch.

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heavywithourbabies · 2 months ago

Text

First off, I'm a guy. So there's that.....

Ok, making one of those little intro pieces so you can get to know a little about me. This tumblr page is nothing more than the ravings of an obsessed lunatic hiding away from the world. My only real kinks are Breeding, Lactation, and the biggest pregnancy fetish you can imagine. (Please take note, I am not sexually into Birth. I am all for fucking so hard your water breaks, sucking on your nipples, rubbing the belly and giving gentle head during contractions, etc. As soon as the baby is in the birth canal, I'm going full on daddy mode. Horny time is over. Anyone else feel the same?)

I am a 40 year old man and I am very attracted to women. In particular, I am aroused by thick, extra curvy, big ass having women. I am feral for HEAVILY pregnant women. I have tons of reasons why but at it's core, I believe it is the ultimate form of femininity. There's nothing more womanly than having a gravid belly heavy with child. Even the phrase "heavy with child" weirdly turns me on.

I'm also very very much turned on by all the side effects of pregnancy including big dark engorged nipples, stretch marks everywhere, not just the belly, the little treasure trail some women get, the bigger hips, your face getting chubby, and a very swollen vagina. That all said, I'm not into Morning Sickness. wakka wakka.

I fully support the LGTBTQ community. I just can't keep track of all the new names and terms. I blame my shitty memoir on wasting my twenties drinking. But I totally support it. be who you want to be and love who you want to love. This life is rough enough without people being shitty to you for your basic human needs.

I am utter devotee to horror movies, and I live for the month of October. Halloween is the greatest day of the year. If you don't like Halloween...... honestly, who are you? Who the fuck hates Halloween? I love the art form of sequential art (comic books) and my favorite Character is Venom from Marvel Comics. I would literally kill to get a chance to write for Venom. Marvel will NOT return my phone calls.

I still write stuff (a lot of half started scripts and abandoned graphic novel ideas mostly) and I will and often shamelessly promote myself and the written erotic stuff I create on here. Enjoy my sexually frustrated ramblings and badly edited prose. Remember kids, it's free.

I am a lonely werewolf hopelessly howling at the moon.

I say love who you gotta love. Do what you need to do. Try to have fun and just don't hurt other people.

I was born in Canada and raised in the States. Toronto is the old country and Denver was home base. Currently in the windy city.

NO MINORS. Seriously, get the hell out of my joint! THIS BLOG IN NO WAY ENDORSES, PROMOTES, OR ENCOURAGES ANY HEINOUS USE OF MINORS. I honestly struggle talking to people under the age of twenty five. I hope I don't have to repeat any of that.

Any Trump supporters who follow my page, I would also ask you to leave. There's nothing here for you at this establishment.

Need to know anything else? Feel free to ask.

-The ghost host with the most, the ghoul that'll make your lady parts drool, and every other terrible joke I can think of.

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weirdgenetic-fuckup · 5 months ago

Note

this is such a weird request but can u do like slash x fem reader where they wake up in eachothers bodies? like fem reader wakes up in slashs body and slash wakes up in readers body

and also smut where slash in the readers body tells the reader in his body what to do and they both realise they like switching ☺️☺️☺️

A/n: I don't know how you thought of this but I love you

Warnings: Smut, body swapping, use of toys, oral sex (f receiving), if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

Part 2

You woke up feeling... different. You were holding something close to you, it was warm and cuddly and smelled familiar.

You brought your hand up to rub your eyes before opening them and you froze. You were holding yourself, not hugging yourself but literally holding your body from a different body.

You shot up and jumped out of bed, rushing to the bathroom to look at yourself in the mirror. Staring back at you was Slash, big hair and shirtless. But, he was you. Or, you were him?

"Y/n..?" A high, groggy voice called. Your voice.

"Bathroom." You replied, shocked by your deeper voice. It was still soft and a bit raspy like Slash's always was, though now with a hint of panic, something you realized you'd never heard from him.

Slash walked in, rubbing his eyes. He reached out to grab you and only then thought something was wrong when he realized he grabbed someone taller than him.

He opened his eyes and looked at himself in the mirror, not saying a word for several moments.

"Huh." He muttered.

"'Huh'?" You repeated. "That's all you have to say, 'huh'?" He stared, again not saying anything.

He looked down and squeezed his new chest. "Cool." You swatted him in the back of the head and he groaned, rubbing where you hit. "Jesus, that hurts."

"Well, now you know how I feel!" He rolled his eyes at you and looked up at you, taking a good look at his appearance.

His gaze trailed down and a smile spread across his. "I definitely know how you feel." You raised a brow at him and looked down to see a very prominent bulge in your leather pants.

You quickly went to cover yourself and he just laughed and walked back to bed. "Wait..." You started and he turned back around to look at you. "How do I deal with this..." You said much quieter.

He looked you up and down again and shrugged. He crawled back into bed and laid there. You came over to him and sat back down beside him.

"Could you..." You trailed, fumbling a gesture.

"I'm not giving you a blow job." You stared down at him.

"First, I wasn't suggesting that you do." You said. "Second, you do give me blow jobs, just not with a dick."

"The dick makes a big fucking difference."

"The clit is a dick. A mini one with more nerve endings." You crossed your arms and huffed, you had to do something, you couldn't just let it sit there. Plus, it was getting painful...

You shimmied your pants down and your dick hit your abdomen, it was a strange feeling you'd never thought of.

"Oh, don't do that in front of me." He groaned, pulling you from your thoughts, and rolled over to face away from you.

"It's your fucking dick!" You snipped, feeling tears welling in your eyes. He glanced back at you over his shoulder, finally awake enough to hear the panic in your voice.

He sat up and leaned against you, resting his head on your shoulder. "This is weird." He mumbled. You nodded, taking a deep breath to calm yourself down. "It's weird to be beside myself... it's weirder that I- you... have a boner..?" You laughed at that. "Seriously, how are you attracted to that?" He asked, looking up at you with a smile.

"It-it feels better than it looks." You said, looking down at the appendage.

"Oh, does it?" You looked back at him.

"You could try it." He stared at your dick, an awkward smile on his face.

"That's disgusting, use your hand." He said and got out of bed, tossing his clothes off as he headed for the door, getting himself completely naked before he reached it. He held the doorknob a moment before turning back to you. "More nerves?" He asked.

You went to the closet while he went back to bed, getting comfortable as you brought over your box of toys.

You set it down and dug through it and pulling out a vibrator, a small one. You gave it to him and he turned it on, eyes flickering between you and it.

"So," you started, "what do I do?"

"You've given me a hand job before, it's the same thing." He said simply.

"I've never been on this side before."

"Neither have I, I still know how to fuck your body." He held the toy to his clit and his breath hitched, mouth dropping open as a low moan left him.

You were staring at yourself but you were still comprehending that it was Slash. Inside that body was still the man you loved and in that body was the man you loved getting off.

Your body reacted to your thoughts and your hand moved to your cock, gripping the base with a firm hold and moving up. Your eyes fluttered at the feeling and your hand moved faster, pulling groans from you.

"Oh, my god, how- fuck, how do you hah-handle this?" He asked, still holding the toy to his clit. He looked down at his new body, staring at the vibrator. He took it off his clit and pushed it into his hole.

You watched his eyes widen and louder moans ripping from his throat. He was squirming, hands unable to stay still. He wanted to touch himself but was already feeling so much. "Do something," he whined, "do something, please!"

You abandoned your own needs and moved between his legs, you'd never done this before and just stared at him twitching for a moment. "Just-just fucking lick it." He whined, reaching down to your head and holding you to him.

You started lapping at his folds, the feeling was strange at first but you got used to it. You looked up at him, watching his reactions to make sure you were doing a good job. He was bucking his hips and grinding against you, looking for more even though he could barely handle what was already happening to him.

You flicked his sensitive bud with your tongue, knowing how it made you feel. "Oh, fuck!" He screamed, eyes rolling back and his back arching as he squirted all over your face. "Don't stop, don't stop, don't stop." He mumbled over and over as more came out of him, his body trembling as he came down from the high.

You pulled away from him, coughing a bit and wiping your drenched face. "Didn't know I was waterboarding you." You sputtered.

Slash's sniffling pulled you from your thoughts and you pulled out the vibrator. He let out a heavy sigh, his body jolting slightly. "Didn't know it felt like that..." He muttered, voice shaking and his eyes looking past you but not taking in much.

His eyes finally narrowed on you and he smiled. "Fuck me."

You chuckled. "Told you it feels better."

"No," he said, "fuck me. Please."

Your eyes widened slightly at that. "I-I don't know how..." You said, gaze trailing over him.

"I'll tell you what to do, just do it." You bit your lip nervously, the insistent pulsing of your cock leading you to hover over him as he laid down under you.

You tried to remember what Slash always did with you and started kissing him, biting his bottom lip but he smacked you. "Don't do that, you bitch." He grumbled, sucking on his lip for a second. "Kiss my neck, you've done that before."

"I've kissed you before, too." He rolled his eyes.

"Not like that, you haven't." You bit your lip. "Look, anything with your mouth you've done before, just do that." You let out a soft sigh and started kissing his jaw and down his neck. "Go inside." He instructed. You held your hard dick in your hand and tried to find the right hole. "Not there!" He stated loudly.

"Well, now you know how I feel." You grumbled.

"And now you know how I feel going in blind." He bit. He reached down and guided you in, drawing moans out of both of you. "Hah, fuck..." He said, voice airy and lust-filled. "Roll your hips."

"What does that mean?" You looked down at him, frustrated that you didn't know what you were doing.

"Jesus, fucking ride me." You stared at him.

"What..?" You said, finally.

"Do what you do when you ride me." You thought about it for a minute before grinding into him. Feeling him wrapped around you, squeezing you tightly, you couldn't stop yourself and set a fast pace, snapping your hips into his repeatedly.

The room filled with your shared moans, your sounds mixing together and echoing off the walls. "Fuck! Right there, right there!" Slash cried, gripping the sheets so tight his knuckled went white.

It wasn't long before you felt a ball tightening in your groin, you wanted to pull out but Slash's legs were wrapped around you, forcing you to stay in him as you came, Slash's high following shortly after and he was squirting around your dick.

You fell onto the bed beside him, staring up at the ceiling with your chest rising and falling heavily. Slash curled up into you, clinging to your arm and sniffled softly.

"Are you ok..?" You asked, looking down at him and holding him tight.

He nodded and nuzzled further into you. "Yeah, your body is just... different..." He mumbled.

"Well," you started, "we know sex is still good." You said with a small smile, looking down at him in hopes that it would cheer him up a bit. His eyes were closed and he was falling asleep, so you pulled him closer and kissed the top of his head.

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genshindsau · 9 months ago

Text

Summary: Scaramouche struggles to accommodate to his place in the harem. It isn't easier when some of the other members of the harem constantly try to talk to him or make him spend time with you. He tells himself he doesn't want to, that he is fine blending into the background and being easily forgotten (is he truly?). Concubine!Scaramouche. Empress!reader

CW: Reverse Harem, cursing, sexual implications, nsfw mentioned but not actually described, mentions of Scaramouche's past (as well as other characters), Scaramouche is rather rude in this and can be degrading to the other members, sexualization, literally just Scaramouche struggling with his feelings, non-sexual nudity.

AN: This wasn't exactly what I originally planned, I ended up including a lot about other characters rather than focusing just on Scaramouche and the readers... oh well. There are also a bit of time skips. Dialogue may be choppy as well, especially towards the end. If its to hard to follow please feel free to let me know.

"I'm just saying, when she does the thing with her fingers…" Childe, as he likes to be called, curled two of his fingers in front of Scaramouche's face. He was wearing a cheeky smile, his eyes glittering as he stared at Scaramouche.

Scaramouche clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth together as his eyes narrowed at Childe.

Go away. Please. Go away. He kept repeating these words in his head.

"Oh," Childe leaned forward, his chin resting on his palm. "I suppose you wouldn't know."

His words held no malicious intent. There wasn't any pity either. Scaramouche knew that but he still wanted to scream. He also wanted to punch Childe right in his bright, smiling face. He was getting too much enjoyment out of bothering and annoying Scaramouche.

"There is nothing wrong with not defiling myself."

Childe snorted. "Is it really defiling? I mean," Childe shrugged his shoulders. "She is our wife."

"No, she isn't. Neither of us are legally married to her."

"Exactly," Childe snapped his fingers. "We're concubines; Her concubines. We get all the fun."

Fun? What part about being a concubine is fun? Childe is a mindless puppy who will go wherever you ask, do whatever you ask. Even kill whoever you want. He has had the unfortunate experience of seeing Childe covered in blood and a body at his feet. When you appeared, he expected the worse. Expected Childe to be whipped or scarred. Instead, you ruffled his blood-coated hair and said you deal with the clean up.

Why is he even listening to him?

"Look if you really don't want to spread your legs for her," Scaramouche cringed at Childe's words. He had a feeling Childe was making his words as crude as possible to get a reaction from Scaramouche.

He was succeeding.

"Then that’s fine. But you do a really shitty job at hiding the way your eyes linger on her."

"I - I do not!" Scaramouche balked at him, his cheeks heating up.

"Really?" Childe deadpanned.

"I would not consider it! She already has more than enough people who would let her use them. I will not be one of them."

Scaramouche felt like he needed to defend himself. Needed to make himself stand above the others and not be one of the men who succumbs to his position as a glorified body to use. He lasted this long - lasted through multiple masters without ever having to give them his body. He can't allow that to change.

You've never even touched him, his mind whispered to him. Aside from the time you disintegrated his previous collar, you've never laid a hand on him.

Childe quieted for a moment. It unnerved Scaramouche as Childe stared at him. He felt like he was looking into his soul and he almost wanted Childe to keep teasing him. He'd prefer that to how he was now looking at him.

"She's not like that." Childe voiced out. His voice almost stern.

"If you're really not interested, then whatever. That's fine. But don't assume things about her when you haven't even try to understand her. She may be cruel to her enemies but they deserve it. She would never force anyone - never force her concubines or consorts to do anything they didn't want. Whether that is in her bed or in their personal life."

Scaramouche's eyes wavered at the shift in Childe's tone. Childe sounded dangerous right now.

"Why," Scaramouche's voice cracked. "Why would I even want to know her - or understand her?"

"Our lives are dedicated to her. They belong to her, wouldn't you - "

Scaramouche cut him off " - And you're okay with that? Belonging to someone like her. Someone who is part of the Imperial Family?"

Childe cannot be that daft. Everyone knows about the Imperial Family. Knows that no one should trust them. Knows that they are cruel, tyrannical, and would do anything to be the empress. He doubts that you are any different. No, he knows that you are no different.

"Sure." Childe leaned back against his chair, his tone softening now. "She gives me whatever I want. Lets me have some control over my life. Lets me fight. But she also protects those who belong to her. She's stern and callous and can be this terrifying larger than life figure but that does not mean she is going to go down the same path as her family."

"… you can't be so sure of that."

"Just like you can't be so sure that she will turn out like her family. I believe in what I see. Maybe she puts on a certain façade in front of us but so what if she does? She still treats us better than anyone else would."

Scaramouche cant find it in himself to refute anything Childe says. He pointedly ignores the underlying truth in Childe's words. It doesn't matter if you've never laid a finger on him or even so much as spend time alone with him. You're royalty. You're part of the imperial family. That automatically makes you a terrible person in scaramouche's eyes.

Scaramouche was dragged out of his thoughts by the scraping of a chair against the floor as Childe stood up. He stretched his arm above his head before resting a palm on Scaramouche's shoulder, ignoring the flinch that came from Scaramouche.

"If you want to ask anything? Or If you want to try something? Anything? I'm sure she will listen if you ask. You just got to be brave enough to do it." Childe winked at him as walked out of the room, humming happily.

Scaramouche ignored the subtle blow to his character from Childe. He was fine the way he was now. He was fine staying in his room and being an easily forgettable presence (no, he wasn't). He was fine not getting close to you or the others in the harem. Keeping to himself is how he has survived everything he has been through, so he will do what he has always done.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scaramouche kept his eye trained on the plate, ignoring the simmering of anger and something else in his gut that he can't name. It was dinner. He dreaded dinner because he was forced to sit with everyone - with you, even though he is about seven seats away. You barely said a word. If it wasn't for the heaviness in the air he might have been able to ignore you and pretend but your presence always left an uncomfortable weight settling around his body - like your engulfing him; all around him no matter how far away he stands.

He wonders if the others feel it. If they do they don't care; or rather revel in the feeling. It just makes him overly conscious.

His hand clenches around the fork in his one hand, turning pale due to the strength as he has to listen to the incessant chattering of the others. It grates on his nerve, rubbing him raw as he has to listen to the happiness that flits from every voice he hears - yet he doesn't hear yours.

He startles as a hand clasps on his shoulders, a good portion of eyes also landing on him. He blinks a few times barely realize someone was calling him. His eyes land on Childe first because of course it does. He then looks to see Venti (fuck), Heizou (double fuck), and finally Itto (well now the world is just being cruel) sitting across from him.

Childe is leaning back in his chair, two of the legs lifting off the ground. "You really have no filter."

It took Scaramouche a moment to realize Childe wasn't talking to him but rather Itto who had an annoying innocent smile on his face. Venti looked somewhere between interested but closed off. His body curls into itself, his shoulders hunching in such a small move that Scaramouche is sure he is the only one who noticed. In the back of his mind, he wonders if these kind of talks drag up old memories for the other concubine - not that he cared enough to learn anything about the others, he just happened to hear about it in passing. Heizou on the other hand has a shit-eating grin on his lips, teeth bared in laughter.

"I - " Itto gawked for a moment. "It's a perfectly normal question."

Scaramouche tried to refocus, to remember what was said but he couldn't.

"Maybe so but asking at dinner, really?"

"Where else am I going to ask? He scurries off like a little mouse whenever he's spots anyone. It's natural to want to know more about each other." Itto is wonderfully dense at times it seems like both a blessing and curse. Scaramouche wants to curse him out but there is no malice in Itto's tone, just genuine curiosity and his words curl uncomfortably in his throat.

"And asking about the time he spent with y/n? That's getting to know him?" Though it may sound like Childe is admonishing Itto, the smile on his lips says the exact opposite. Childe could careless, he was just enjoying the way this would egg on Itto and annoy Scaramouche.

"Besides everyone know he hasn't spent the night with her - or even an evening with her." Heizou was the one who spoke this time.

"That is none of your business!" Scaramouche sputtered out, his ears turning red.

"Seriously?" Itto turned to Scaramouche with wide-eyes. "Why not?" It was an innocent enough question but Scaramouche wouldn't answer - much less at the dinner table where everyone is basically in love with you and not to mention the fact that you are only seven or so seats separated from him.

"It's no use," Childe shrugged. "I've already asked him about it."

"You didn't ask, you interrogated me." Scaramouche gritted back.

Childe just waved a dismissive hand.

"Why complain. As far as I see it, that means more time for us." Heizou spoke up.

"Well yeah," Itto agreed. "But still… you should be able to experience things with her. I mean, you haven't even spent any time with her? At all?" Itto seemed genuinely curious but all Scaramouche could do was grind his teeth as his eyes narrowed at the plate in front of him. He focus on ignoring the embarrassment that caused him to want to curl up in his seat and well just die. He thinks that would be preferable over what he is currently going through.

He's thankful that he is sat at the other end of the table. Maybe, just maybe there is a chance you didn't hear any of the conversations, the teasing aimed towards him. Yet he knows you did - that is if you decided it was important enough to listen to, you would.

Without meaning to his eyes flickered down to your end of the table. Your head was angled and he followed where he thinks your eyeline would be and landed on Aether and Tigh-nari who appear to be laughing together about something. You're face doesn't even twitch, your lips don't curve upwards but they don't frown either. It's completely neutral, just like it was when he first met you - when he still belonged to Ei - but it didn't feel nearly as oppressive.

He didn't understand why. Nothing's changed. Not for him.

"I don't want to." He kept his voice low. "And I do not see how it is any of your business or why you keep bringing it up," He glared specifically at Childe who stared back at him.

Itto gaped at him for a second before he shook his head. "We're not trying to make you uncomfortable or anything. I didn't mean to imply anything lewd. But… you don’t want to be involved in anything - whether it is with the harem or y/n. You're going to spend the rest of your life here, with her, with us - with all of us, even the people who seem to be the hardest to get to know want you to be comfortable and happy here. Closing yourself off, distancing yourself… maybe you had to do it in the past but the people here,” Itto shook his head and let out a heavy sigh. “What I am trying to say is that no one here wants to hurt you or see you suffer."

The last thing Scaramouche needed is to be told this by Itto of all people. He wanted to scream. Wanted to rip his hair out. Most of all he wanted to rip out the longing that wracked through him at Itto's word. It felt like he was peering down into Scaramouche's soul and voicing out everything Scaramouche had pushed down. Tucked so deep inside of him that even he forgot.

When he was younger, that was all he wanted to hear. After he was taken the first time, he imagined faceless people who accepted him and loved him but as months passed, then years and then he was sold to Ei, he forced himself to get rid of that pathetic yearning. People just weren't like that. People were selfish and cruel.

Yet, he saw it around the harem building and in the palace countless times. Thoma baking treats for the rest of the harem members just because. Venti who stayed up playing the flute for the others who couldn't sleep. Even Ayato - who Scaramouche deemed the most selfish - would cover the other harem members up in a blanket if they feel asleep anywhere. Aether, who knitted blankets in the winter, not only for the harem members but also for servants and staff.

You… you who never raised your voice at your harem members. You who took in a unconventional men - Itto, Venti - and never made them feel less than because of their background. You who carried them to their beds when they fell asleep. You who…

It doesn't matter. None of it matters.

"You're sheltered. Naïve." Scaramouche forced out between his teeth. "We're not family. We're not brothers. We're all stuck under the whims of a women who could kill us with a thought." His voice increased in tone as he spoke. He wasn't shouting, but he was loud enough to draw attention to himself. "I will never think of myself as lowly as the rest of you do." He squeezed his eyes shut.

He was telling himself to shut up. Screaming at himself inside of his mind but he couldn't stop.

"I won't settle for debasing myself like the rest of you do. Especially for someone who doesn't even love you back."

There was a small cough and Scaramouche froze. It was silent - no one else at the table spoke and he could feel numerous eyes on him. The color drained from his skin as he hastily stood up, throwing the napkin on the table before quickly leaving the table. He didn't even care for protocol or for your dismissal.

As he fled down the halls, tears of anger and embarrassment burned behind his eyes but he didn't let them fall, even as they blurred his vision. The door slammed shut behind him and he collapsed against it, his head thumping against it as he cursed at himself. Cursed at the others for being so kind to him. Cursed at you for not being as horrible towards your harem as he wanted to believe you were.

--------------------------------------------------------------

No one spoke to him the next day. Not that he made it easy. He hid in his room, ate his breakfast in his room, stared at the window in his room. He only ever saw the two servants assigned specifically for him. They even brought up dinner for him - telling him that you told them to do that. You probably didn't even want to see his face. He lashed out at the others concubines; concubines you cared about much more than you did him.

It still left an uncomfortable burning in his chest. He made himself vulnerable. He showed too much emotion, not just in front of one or two people but everyone in the harem and yourself. He might as well as starting weeping in front of all them as well.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

He blinked, lifting his head from the pillow. He wondered who it was. Servants only knock out of politeness once before entering the room, other harem members just barge in at times. For a minutes he felt a tinge of fear thinking that it was you, but you wouldn't knock either - you had no reason to.

Scaramouche moved to open the door so only a sliver of light creeped through. The first thing he saw was the long red hair, pinned back and the red robe - It was Diluc.

"Can I come in?" He asked softly - like he was coaxing a wild animal. Scaramouche nodded and opened the door further to let him in.

Scaramouche bowed his head, his eyes lingering on the embroidered robe Diluc was wearing. His eyes trailed over the golden patchwork. There wasn't a single stand of hair out of place, everything was perfect. He was perfect.

Diluc's eyes glanced around the room but he said nothing. Scaramouche was expecting an admonishment, something about his bed being dirty or the left over plates on the bed but Diluc's eye's just skimmed right over them.

"I wasn't expecting company." It came out harsher than Scaramouche intended. He had never been alone with Diluc before; barely said a few words to him besides the first few days he was introduced into the harem. Diluc was either busy, bustling about the harem building or he was by your side.

"I suppose I should have sent a servant or someone to tell you beforehand. I'm sorry if this seems abrupt, I just wanted to… see how you are doing."

"You mean after my outburst." Scaramouche forced out, his voice tight.

Diluc let out a soft, sympathetic sigh. "Yes, I suppose so. Though, I wasn't thinking about it as an outburst."

Scaramouche didn't care. If Diluc was here - all he could assume was one thing.

"So you're here to deal a punishment?"

"A punishment?" Diluc tilted his head, confusion in his voice.

"I insulted the other concubines. I left before I was dismissed. It's your job isn't it? As the head consort - you deal out the punishments."

"You misunderstand." Diluc shook his head. "Can I sit?" He motioned towards a small couch that was placed in the room. Scaramouche nodded and Diluc sat down, his hands smoothing down his clothes.

"I am not here to give out a punishment. You are not the first to resort to insults or get angry at the others. It is natural that it happens when there are so many of us, and with such different personalities." Even as Diluc spoke, there was a small smile forming on his lips. He almost seems like he is reminiscing as he speaks of the harem members.

Scaramouche takes small steps until he is able to sit across from Diluc, keeping a good amount of distance between the two of them.

"So you decided to what? Come here out of the goodness of your heart." There was distain in his voice as he tried to figure out Diluc's true intentions. "Or are you here to defend the others? Defend y/n? If you are, you can leave. I don't want to hear it."

Diluc just gazed at him, no malice or annoyance in his eyes.

"I am not here to defend anyone. I am here because I wanted to check up on you. I know we haven't had a lot of chances to talk or even get to know each other - that's no ones fault - but, I would still like for you to be comfortable in the harem. Find some sort of enjoyment in the life you are now living."

Scaramouche stared at Diluc, scrutinizing him.

"Why are you all saying that?" He shook his head. "You, Itto, even Childe for fucks sake. All of you go around, stating that I should be happy and appreciate the life I am given." Scaramouche raised from his seat as he spoke. "But all of you - you guys have no idea about how awful this world truly is. How awful it can be. How things can change in a split second. How can you come in here and - and lecture me about life when you and all of the others are sheltered behind the whims of a cruel woman."

There was silence. Scaramouche words continued to float through both of their minds. If he wasn't getting punished, he definitely would now.

"You don't think we're not aware?" Diluc question is so simple and it sends a shiver down Scaramouche's body. There's no heat to his tone and Diluc doesn't appear to be angry. But the way he says it, the small almost pained smile that graces his face, it leaves Scaramouche stumbling over his words.

"I - I didn't mean - I mean…"

"It's okay." Diluc lifted a hand as if to placate him. Diluc's eyes shifted away, as if in thought, before looking back at Scaramouche. "I grew up in a family with three sisters. They were…. terrible. Terrible people. Terrible wives. I would see my brother in laws hiding bruising, hiding their pain. I would hear the comments my sisters directed towards their own husband - comments so degrading and humiliating that even as a young boy, I wanted to curl up and cry just from hearing their words. They would even let others say whatever they wanted. They never defended them. Never did nothing. In fact, sometimes my sisters would egg others on to say even worse."

Diluc remained poised as he talked but there was a shakiness in his tone that betrayed his feelings. Scaramouche's heart clenched in his chest - though, he is not sure why.

"For the first 18 years of my life I grew up around them. Grew up in a family that basically trained me to be a perfect husband, seeing me more as an investment to getting rich than an actual person." A sigh slipped past Diluc's lips. "What I am trying to say is: I know we have different experiences. Everyone in this harem has different experiences when it comes to our time before we entered the harem but try not to let it define how you are going to live the rest of your life. I can't tell you to trust me, or trust the others, or even trust Y/n, that’s a choice you have to decide whether you want to make or not."

Diluc stood up, his movements effortlessly beautiful. He stepped closer to Scaramouche but didn't touch him. "If you do decide to try, you can start with something small. I promise you that, as long it doesn't pose a threat to you or anyone in this palace, it will be fulfilled."

With a small bow of his head, Diluc moved passed him and towards the door. "I hope to see you at dinner tomorrow."

--------------------------------------------------------------

Start small. Start small. Scaramouche repeated those words inside of his head before letting out an annoyed, disgruntled sound.

His hands gripped at the strands of his hair, longer than he has ever been allowed to grow it out, as he paced around the room. The only light shining through is the moon and the stars - they are the only one's baring witness to his meltdown.

He doesn't want to. Actually, he does. He just doesn't want to admit it. Admitting it would mean allowing everything he pushed down into the small crevices inside of him would come spilling out. One at a time, slowly, over time until he can't stop it and he is overflowing with all the pain and loneliness that he thought he had moved on from.

He wants friends. He wants to be loved. He wants to be cared for. He wants to do things; explore, paint, learn to ride a horse. He wants it so bad that it makes him sick. He wants to be involved. He wants to believe that he is worth more than the shiny collar that used to be fastened around his neck - signifying that he is nothing more than a prize without a voice, without a say.

Not is, he tells himself. Was. He was nothing more than a prize. But, he doesn't have to be. Not if he decides to at least try what everyone else has been telling him.

But what if it goes wrong?

He can handle being dismissed and looked down on right now. He just stuffs the anger and despair down alongside everything else. But if he opens himself up; allows himself to possibly believe that maybe he can fit in and be accepted for himself, and it all turns to nothing… he isn't sure if he will be able to pick himself up again.

It is either do this one thing or don't do it. It's simple. The choice is simple. Pick one, ignore the other, that is all he has to do. It doesn't even have to be a lot of words, just go up, say what he needed to say then leave. If worse comes to worse, he could say the others encouraged him - that Diluc encouraged him. That would at least get you to think before you decided to lash out and punish him for interrupting you with nonsense.

"fuck, fuck, fuck," Scaramouche groaned as if he was in a lot of pain, a string of profanities leaving him, something he would never do in the presence of others.

--------------------------------------------------------------

He stared at the bronze door in front of him, his eyes narrowed. He pointedly ignored the guards who stood at each end of the halls. He also ignored the looks sent his way when he entered the hall that led to your room. He wonders what is going through their mind when they look at him.

That he is desperate. Pitiful.

Maybe that he finally degraded himself enough to be used.

He raised a hand, his hands forming a fist as he prepared to knock on the door. He stilled right before he brought his fist down. What is he doing? What if you're not even in there? What if you just send him away without allowing him to say anything?

Nope. He's not going to allow that. He is not going to allow you to not listen to him when he had worked up the courage to come all the way up to your room - a place he spend his entire time in the harem ignoring.

Instead of rapping his knuckles against the door, his hand grabbed the two handles and pushed the door open.

It wasn't what he was expecting.

Well, he wasn't sure what he was expecting but not this.

You're room looked every part like it belonged to royalty but there was something else that left it looking almost cozy. In between all the furnished gold, there was tea placed on the table (two cups) and a half-eaten cake. There was a pale-blue silk robe thrown over the couch which he knew belonged to Ayato. There was cushions thrown on the floor along with a blanket. Leaning on the floor against one of the walls he saw numerous painting - some finished, some not - but none of them look like the ones seen hanging up in the halls of the palace.

He couldn't continue to look around the room before one of your personal servant's drew his attention. The servant startled at Scaramouche's unplanned and borderline inappropriate entrance into the room - a resort building on their lips but they quickly clamp their mouth shut as a voice - your voice - echoes from another room.

"Its fine. Leave us."

For a moment he thought you were talking to him but just as quickly the servant bowed to him, though their face screwed up. Their lips pursed like they were looking at some annoying pest. Since you were still in the adjacent room, Scaramouche felt brave enough to send a glare at the servant.

Concubine beats servant - even servants who work directly under you.

He can't lie, it felt nice to do that.

He was left alone in the room now. His feet were frozen to the floor as his eyes lingered on the open doorway, fluorescent light spilling out and into your bedroom. You were in there. You knew he had entered your room and you haven't told him to get out. Not yet at least.

"Are you just going to stand there? Or did you barge into my room without a reason? Unless you finally decided to give up the whole 'Don't talk to me. Don't touch me.' facade. I thought you'd hold out longer."

He flushed as you spoke. Both from anger and embarrassment at being called out. His feet carried him towards the entrance of the doorway, a resort building on his lips.

"I have in no way come here to spend time with you or be... touched."

"But you do want to talk." It wasn't a question. You seemed to already know why he had stormed into your room and now...

His eyes widened.

He had walked right into your bathroom and there you were. You were in a huge tub, naked but the water and suds covered you from the neck down. You still had your eye's covered as well.

His brain failed him. He couldn't form any words and a redness blossomed on the tip of his ears.

"You're leering."

"I am - I am not." He sputtered.

"Wanna join me?"

"Absolutely not."

You shrugged. "Then you're going to just stand there?"

"I - no I am not. I just came to -"

"To what?"

Scaramouche pursed his lips. His eyes flicker around the room, looking everywhere but at you.

"Diluc," he figured this would be the safest way to start. "Diluc said I should come and talk to you. The others did as well."

He trailed off awkwardly, expecting you to say something to him but you didn't. Instead you just leaned back against the tub.

"I wasn't going to."

You just hum.

"I thought it was a ridiculous idea but I just want to make things clear. I - I am not here to be one of your bodies to use. Or for you to assume that I am going to do whatever you ask me just because you're... you. I've spent enough of my life being surrounded by women who try to dictate everything about my life from what I eat to what I wear.

"I have no desire to understand you or get close to you. But I will apologize for the way I acted towards the others - your concubines and consorts, I mean. They - they are not you and just because I don't like you doesn't mean I should have been so... callous with the others and lashed out during dinner."

He let out a shuddering breath, a weight lifting from his chest as he said everything he wanted to say. He didn't realize just how nervous he actually was before coming into your room. His body feels limp.

You, however, didn't say anything for a short while.

In the back of his mind, he bet you enjoyed seeing him shift uncomfortably, a small sheen of sweat forming on his skin.

"Very well then."

He blinked at you.

"So that's it then." He stared at you, his eyebrows furrowing.

"That's it. Why? Where you expecting something else."

"Well no. I just - you're not angry. I mean at me insulting you earlier and then coming in here and basically saying I'll never," He trailed off, not sure why he was trying to explain anything to you - not when you don't seem to care.

You laugh softly. The sound ringing in his ears. "I was angry but not at what you said about me. You think you're words were insulting? They were the truth. Besides I've been called much worse." You shrug. "What I was angry at was your blatant disregard and disrespect for the others. But it appears that you've changed your mind and realize that you shouldn't blame them just because of your hate for me so no reason to linger in the past."

"You almost sound like you actually care about them." This slipped out before he even realized what he said. Perhaps after what he said earlier, after confronting you, he finds it harder to hold his tongue.

Your lips tighten but other than that you don't say anything. You don't agree or disagree with his statement.

"So you don't love them? Even though all of them seem like they are deeply in love with you."

You don't answer and Scaramouche thinks he screwed up.

"Does love have to be the only reason I take care of those under me? Can't there be any other reason?"

"Selfishness? Control? Pride?" Scaramouche spoke without thinking.

"Maybe. Maybe not." Scaramouche swears he see's your lips twitch. "I may not love them but they're mine. I protect what's mine."

So, he was right about some things.

"So it is pride and ego."

"…"

You shift in the tub, your head falling back against the marble. His eyes flicker down to your throat, watching as a bead of water travels down your skin before snapping his eyes back to your face.

"Most of them are innocent to the truth of the world." You broke the silence after a minute.

"They know men are deemed lesser in this society but they haven't experiences the harshness that the world can offer. Not like you have or Venti or Diluc."

He doesn't see how this answers his previous questions.

"Do I love them? No. I don't believe I am capable of loving anything. But, I care about them. About what they can do - both for me and for themselves. I don't want them to whither away in a society that takes everything from them and become a shell of who they are and what they want to be in the future."

Your fingers drum against the marble of the tub, a small sound echoing in the bathroom.

"You see me as a horrible, cruel person and in some ways, I would say its true. I don't care about the lives of people outside of this palace - not even the people I am meant to. I don't feel anything when I take the lives of others - whether they are enemies or just people fighting because they have to. Sometimes, I even enjoy it. That alone would have everyone labeling me as cruel and even sadistic and I would agree. However, I protect them, ensure they have a good life because I need to. I need their support. But… the people in this palace - they are my people. I want to keep them happy, keep them sheltered, keep them protected; and I'll do whatever that takes in order to guarantee that."

Your head lifts from where it was resting against the tub. He can't see your eyes, the cloth still covering them, but he can feel your gaze penetrating him. The sudden pressure around him is becoming a constant whenever you decide to gaze at him.

"Now, that includes you too. You were a war prize originally, that much is true. You were a means to insult Ei but now you are one of my people. You may just be a concubine but I don't want you clinging to your old life and your old ways of thinking that you need to isolate yourself to survive."

He hated the way you see through him. This is the most you've talked to him - ever; and yet you read him without a problem. It leaves him feeling naked and bared in front of you, even with all of his clothes still on.

"Think what you want about me. I don't care. But the others, they are good and pure and kind. At least open yourself up to them. Each of them will take you in with open arms and love and care about you in ways you may have forgotten."

Scaramouche wasn't sure how to reply to all that. You weren't being vulnerable or even truly opening up to him but there was something in your words that left him shifting on his feet.

"And if I don't want to?" His voice came out shakier than he wanted. His eyes glued to his feet rather than looking at you.

"Then don't. Spend the rest of your time in the harem alone and miserable." You waved a hand like it meant nothing to you.

"I can make sure your fed and healthy but other than that everything else is you're choice."

#genshin au #consort au #empress au #genshin impact #genshin x reader #c:empress #genshin impact x reader #c:scaramouche #scaramouche x reader

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erinfern0 · 1 year ago

Note

Can u pls pls pls do a short story about Simon helping out his girlfriend who is sick but won’t admit they’re sick?!? Like they are literally sweating balls and about to pass out and ghost has to physically brag them into bed. Go crazy pls!!!!!!!!!!

simon "ghost" riley x sick!fem!reader

warnings: none other than a bit of biting by the end.

"I'm fine, Simon." you repeated once again, dodging him in the door frame, but he didn't listen. Following you into the kitchen with a thermometer in his hand, Simon walked around the kitchen aisle and looked at you from the other side.

All day, you've been acting strange. You avoided coming close to Simon in hopes of him not noticing, but he obviously realized how warm your body was and how hazed your eyes were.

You placed your palms on the top of the counter, trying to look intimidating, but he quickly followed suit with a worried look in his eyes. Of course, he's still bigger and stronger than you, and with that look in his eyes — yeah, I think you've just lost.

"I'm not a little kid, Si. Can take care of myself." you sighed, but the soldier standing before you shook his head.

"You sure act like one." he snapped, leaning over the counter to get his face closer to yours. The piercing gaze he gave you almost broke your guard when his hand reached up to check your temperature. "Come on, if you're so sure you are alright, just let me."

You tried to just walk away, but as soon as you started walking, he appeared beside you and wrapped one arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him with a chuckle. You yelled his name in surprise, struggling your way out, but it was too late.

"Wasn't that bad, huh?" he asked as the thermometer lit up. He leaned against the counter, almost sitting on it while chewing his inner cheek in waiting. You were about to walk out of the kitchen with your arms crossed as the device called out the number.

You froze, hearing how high your temperature actually was. Sure, you suspected to be sick, but didn't want to admit it. You looked at Simon in hopes of seeing that smirk again, but this time he just looked worried and maybe a tiny bit upset.

"Love..."

"That's nothing, Si. I told you I'm fine!" you interrupted him with a roll of your eye and stepped away as he tried to walk closer. You could feel the sweat on your back, making your hoodie cling to your body, but you preferred to ignore it. The fog appearing before your eyes wasn't expected at all, making you weak in the knees.

"That's it, girl. We're getting you back to bed." he said as soon as he caught your almost falling form. You tried to push his strong arms away, but to no avail. He dragged you across the hallway, kissing the top of your head to calm you down.

You squirmed around in his arms, biting into his bicep with just the slightest force, threatening to deepen your teeth into his muscled skin. He just laughed at your tries, lightly kicking the door to your shared bedroom open.

Soon enough, you were forcibly tucked into bed. He made sure to help you wear something more comfortable and covered your body with the warm duvet, smiling at the view of only your head visible above the covers.

Your eyelids fluttered as he left the room, making you think you could get out if you wanted, but as soon as you moved, Simon got back with a fresh and steaming cup of tea. "Stay there." he warned playfully, placing the cup on the side table, sitting on the edge of the bed, right beside your thighs.

You couldn't help the sleepy smile that fell on your lips when he helped you sit up to drink. As much as you hated to admit it, being sick around him wasn't that bad after all.

masterlist | request info

#simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley #simon ghost riley #ghost #ghost cod #cod mw2 #cod mwii #ghost mw2 #ghost simon riley #cod ghost #riri writes

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wordsarelife · 5 months ago

Text

—hits different

pairing: isaac lahey x fem!reader

summary: isaac and you both like each other, it just takes some time for you to realize that the other does as well..

warnings: underage drinking

notes: this should've been posted yesterday.. i'm so sorry

"have any of you seen y/n?" isaacs voice beamed off the walls of the large room and both derek and scott turned their heads so sudden, he wondered if he had just interrupted something.

"y/n?" scott wondered "haven't seen her since school"

"well, obviously she's not here" derek exclaimed with a roll of his eyes and isaac sighed.

"i know" he stretched "i just wondered if any of you knew where exactly she is" he widened his eyes to make a point, which was answered with another eye roll from derek and a shrug from scott. "well, thank you for all the help. i'll go find her myself then"

"she might be hanging out with stiles" scott said as isaac was already walking out of the door.

despite scott being not sure, isaac decided that it did not hurt to drive to stiles' house and have a look for himself. he often found you in the company of the boy, which sometimes made him wonder if there was going more than friendship between the both of you.

he stopped the car before stiles house and got out, walking up the front porch and knocking on the door.

"hey" stiles exclaimed when he swung open the door.

"hey" isaac greeted "i'm looking for y/n" he explained, before he tried to take a look inside "is she here?"

stile shook his head "no, she mentioned something about a club, and some other friend that was going with her"

"huh" isaac nodded, with a tight-lipped smile. "thats kind of weird of her, isn't it?"

stiles just shrugged his shoulders and isaac nodded finally.

"okay, ehm, thanks man"

"sure" stiles nodded with a tightlipped smile, at the lack of movement from isaac, he raised his brows "is there still something i can help you with?"

"uh, yeah" isaac smiled uncomfortably "what's the name of the club?"

"the sinema, i guess" stiles replied shrugging "it's the only club around here"

"yeah, right" isaac raised his arm, lazily waving goodbye, before he walked back to his car.

"is there one story that does not involve isaac lahey?" your friend, amy, loudly asked your, trying to be heard over the music.

"sorry" you replied "we're just very close"

"yeah, yeah" amy nodded her head, having heard enough of the boy in the last hour "that's exactly why you're gonna get drunk out of your mind and forget all about him"

"i'm not sure that's how it works" you noted.

"well it does in my books" amy furrowed her brows, holding the tequila shot in your direction.

you took the glass, admitting that you couldn't think of a better solution yourself, so it couldn't hurt to try hers. anything to get your mind of the blonde boy was greatly appreciated.

the night passed by quickly, you were a drunken mess, slurring about everything and anything.

"you know what i find weird?" you asked amy, both of you laying in the sitting booth of the club.

"no, what?" amy replied, a giggle breaking out between her lips. you joined into her laughter, unable to contain yourself, before you quickly shook your head, focusing back on the matter you were trying to discuss.

"well, scott said that isaac doesn't fancy kylie" you began, rolling your eyes at the name of the girl. at the same time you felt kind of bad, she hadn't done anything to you and yet here you were, saying her name like she had ran over your dog. "but if that's true, why is he always sending her these fuck me eyes?"

"fuck me eyes?" amy repeated, giggling once again "i'm not sure that's a thing, honey"

"i'm sure it is, i've seen it first-hand from stiles to lydia"

amy laughed even louder amidst the fact that you had spied on other people to prove your point.

"i think that's just stiles personally" she shrugged.

the thing about being drunk was that there was no way to direct any feelings, when you were drunk, your mood shifted like you were sitting on a roller coaster.

"can you please take this seriously?" you asked, your tone etched in annoyance and frustration.

"but you're being ridiculous" amy shook her head and you sat up, crossing your arms.

"i'm not trying to be" you muttered, the first tears escaping your eyes.

"y/n, sweetheart" amy cooed, sitting up as well and dropping an arm around your shoulder. "don't cry about him again please" you felt bad that it was your fault that the mood had shifted so drastically. both of you had so much fun all night and now you had gone and spoiled the mood.

"sorry" you cried. "i just miss isaac so much and i wish that he would miss me too whenever we're not together"

unbeknownst to you, isaac did miss you just as much as you were missing him.

"excuse me?" the bouncer turned around, raising his brows at the boy that was absolutely not dressed like he was going clubbing.

"what?" the man asked, watching the blonde boy expectingly.

"i was searching for my friend" isaac explained "she's about this tall" he held a hand up, before he continued to describe the color and length of your hair, what you were probably wearing and how your voice sounded "she's really pretty, really nice, most of the time at least" he ended his description.

the bouncer, who was ready to turn the boy away with an annoyed 'do you think i know everyone inside?', paused, when he noticed two girls stumbling out of the entrance. "that her?" he asked, pointing a finger in their direction.

"wow" isaac muttered impressed, before he nodded "yeah, thanks man" he patted the bouncer's shoulder, before he walked up to amy and you.

"isaac" you slurred as you recognized the boy behind amy.

"yeah, yeah" amy nodded "we already discussed him, honey"

"no" you shook your head, pointing again "isaac!"

amy almost sighed in relief when she noticed the boy approaching. even though she had the same amount of tequila shots as you, she had calmed down a bit and was way less drunk than you. she could handle alcohol much better than you anyway.

"hey" isaac smiled with a lopsided grin.

"isaac!" you slurred once again and the blonde boy laughed at your excitement.

"do you think you could take her home?" amy asked "my boyfriend just came and we want to stay a bit longer. i'd invite the both of you along, but i think y/n's had enough"

"of course" isaac nodded "no problem"

"thank you" amy smiled gratefully, before she hugged you goodbye and pointed her boyfriend out to isaac, so he was sure she was not alone waiting for him.

"bye!" you slurred in her direction as she took off.

isaac watched you in silent amusement. "let's go home, yeah?" he smiled and you nodded, your eyes already halfway closed.

he helped you to the car, all while you put on a tremendous rendition of taylor swifts 'love story'. you missed half the lyrics and weren't singing the right notes, but isaac didn't mind.

"pretty good" he complimented laughing once your singing had been finished.

"thank you, isaac" you smiled at him, dragging out his name. "your name is so beautiful" you smiled before you repeated pronouncing it slower every time.

the sunlight streamed through the window, hitting your face and waking you up with an unpleasant grogginess. your head throbbed, and your mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton. slowly, you opened your eyes and glanced around, realizing you were in your own bed. relief washed over you briefly before flashes of the previous night trickled back.

you remembered the club, the tequila shots, and then… isaac. you groaned, hiding your face in the pillow, trying to bury the embarrassing memories. what had you said to him? something about his name being beautiful. you cringed inwardly. you could not remember his answer, nor anything that happened after.

a sudden noise from the front door made you sit up abruptly, the room spinning a little from the movement. you steadied yourself, listening. someone was trying to come into the house. your heart raced as you quickly as you oustretched your hand, reaching for the phone on the bedside table.

"amy?" you whispered as soon as you friend had picked up.

"y/n?" amy wondered. you could tell that she had just woken up herself, her voice almost breaking. "who's that?" another voice asked and you could imagine henry, amy's boyfriend laying next to her, confusion evident on his face.

"it's y/n" amy whispered harshly, before her mouth was closer to the phone again. "what is it, honey? it's the middle of the night"

"it's past eleven" you whispered harshly "and someones trying to break into the house"

"what?" you couldn't see what she was doing, but imagined she was sitting up in bed, due to all the noise she was making.

"someone's breaking in" you repeated.

"shit" amy said worriedly "okay, it's alright, henry can come and-"

before she could finish, the front door flew open. you quickly slipped onto the ground so you could hide behind the bed. "too late" your voice was a pitch higher as you basically screamed in a whisper "they're inside"

"shit, shit, shit" you could hear rushed movements on the other side of the phone "get up, idiot" amy screamed at henry (you assumed) "our friend is getting murdered"

"amy" even after all the years at the side of scott and stiles and every bad situation they had gotten themselves in, you had never been so scared before.

"it's alright, babe" amy tried to sound calming, but failed miserably "we're coming to help you"

"y/n?" a voice called and steps neared your bedroom. you couldn't help the sigh of relief escaping your lips.

"are you dead?" amy screamed and you held the phone away, your ears ringing from the loudness of her voice. "did they find you?"

"well if they didn't before, they would have now" you muttered "i'm alright, it's just isaac"

isaac opened the door, just as you had finished speaking. you raised your hand, waving at him and he walked around the bed, eyebrows furrowed.

"i'll call you back later" you said into the phone, ending the call before amy was able to say anything else.

"so, what are you doing, exactly?" isaac asked, amusement sounding through his voice.

"i thought someone was trying to break in" you shrugged, you saw no sense in lying.

"oh sorry" isaac scratched the back of his neck "i didn't mean to scare, you asked me to stay yesterday, so i slept on the couch and went to grab some breakfast for us"

"oh god" you held your hand in your hands, not being able to look at him "i can't even remember half the car ride yesterday, let alone anything that followed after" you looked down and only noticed now that you were wearing a pyjama.

"you changed yourself" isaac quickly said as he noticed the worry on your face "you asked me to give you a pyjama and changed while i waited in the hallway"

"sorry" you shook your head "i shouldn't have assumed—“

"no, no" isaac quickly interrupted "it's fine, please don't apologize"

you stood up and both of you were now standing in front of each other. "did i say something embarrassing yesterday?" you asked. you weren't sure if you wanted an answer to that, but you had to know.

isaac smiled. "well, you told me that my name was beautiful, which no one has done before, so it's greatly appreciated"

"that's it?" you wondered.

"eh, no" isaac looked a bit uncomfortable now and your smile died down.

"did i say something inappropriate?" your eyes widened "did i say something that made you uncomfortable?"

"no, but" isaac looked out of the window behind you, his cheeks reddening more and more "you said that you really really liked me"

your eyes widened even more and you looked down in embarrassment. "oh my god, i'm so—" you paused, remembering a very important detail from the night before "wait, why were you at the club yesterday?"

isaac laughed. "i was searching for you, actually" he admitted.

"oh really?" you smiled up at him.

"yeah" isaac shrugged "that's also why i stayed even though i live three minutes away, because i really really like you too"

a wave of relief and something warmer washed over you. isaac's words took a moment to sink in, and when they did, your heart fluttered.

"you... you like me?" you repeated, hardly believing what you were hearing.

isaac nodded, his cheeks still tinged with a light blush. "yeah, i do. i have for a while now, but i didn't know how to tell you. when stiles said you were at the club last night, i thought it was the perfect chance to see you."

you couldn't help but smile, the nervousness in your stomach slowly turning into excitement. "you asked stiles where i was?"

"yeah" isaac shrugged, laughing "i thought you were with him, because i always thought there was something going on between the two of you"

"oh, isaac" you shook your head "that couldn't be more wrong. as i said last night: i like you and only you. stiles is like a brother to me, i couldn't never even, no—ew"

isaac giggled, before he stepped closer, his expression softening. "i'm glad we finally got that out in the open."

you nodded, feeling a sense of anticipation building. "so, what now?"

isaac's lopsided grin returned. "how about we start with breakfast? i got your favorite from the bakery down the street."

your stomach growled at the mention of food, and you laughed. "that sounds perfect."

#teen wolf isaac #isaac lahey #teen wolf isaac lahey #isaac lahey x reader #teen wolf pack x reader #teen wolf stiles #teen wolf #scott mccall #stiles stilinski #lizzys1kfollowercelebration #lizzysthousandfollowerspecial #hitsdifferent #taylor swift #midnights

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elllisaaa · 9 months ago

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hey there, sweetie 🫶🏼 surprisingly i’m not here to yap about sunghoon this time!

i found myself thinking about sub!mingi 😔 him coming back very late at night from practice, so exhausted and groggy.. he instantly throws himself on the bed, but when you kiss him just to say hello he doesn’t want to let go. he begs you to help him relax before sleep in such a needy voice you’ve never heard from him before. he even lets you undress him, he doesn’t lift a finger. but he doesn’t have to, you’re more than pleased to do everything for him sigh… i just can’t get the idea of jerking him off with one hand, and choke him with the other for some reason it’s torturing me

hii lovely ! so shocked that you're not thinking about sunghoon for once but i'm glad you did because i was just waiting for an excuse to write about sub!mingi 😔.

MINGI is always so tired when he comes home from practice, but even more so when yunho forced him to repeat one particular move over and over until he got it right. his hair are still wet from the shower he took before joining you on the bed, just wanting to hold you close to him and finally sleep.

"welcome home baby."

you smiled at him, all cuddled up against you, arms wrapped around your waist. mingi lifted his head, locking his gaze with yours before his eyes shifted to your lips enough for you to notice it and lean down to kiss him softly, only a sweet peck. but for some reason, it ignited something in him, a feeling of desire he couldn't contain.

mingi kissed you again, this time a lot more hungrily, slipping his tongue into your open mouth and letting it dance with yours. the surprise passed quickly, and you kissed him back just as sloppily, loving how desperate he is to make out with you. and when you try to get away from his hold to breathe, mingi brings you back to him immediately, needing so bad to feel you against him, to feel your touch on him.

"please help me baby", he said while pressing his body flush against yours, allowing you to feel his hard on. "want you to touch me, please ?"

and how could you deny him that when he already looked so fucked up and pretty with his lust filled eyes ? you pushed mingi to lay on his back on the sheets, getting him rid from his shirt and sweatpants, admiring his big, hard cock for a minute, nearly drooling at the sight of his tip already leaking pre cum.

"please baby just touch me, please."

you bite your lips while reaching for his dick, wrapping your hand around him. the way his begs and moans were slipping past his lips so easily was getting you wetter than you thought it would. seeing your boyfriend who was usually tossing you around like you were a doll so pliant to your touch strangely did it for you, leading you to straddle his thigh to get some kind of friction while you continued to stroke his cock at the rhythm you knew he liked.

"feels good baby ?", you asked with a cheeky grin, already knowing from the whines he was letting out that it indeed felt good. "s-so good ! please don't stop, love it so much..."

and you're not planning on stopping anytime soon, the thought of having a big guy like mingi in the palm of your hand was really arousing. and all he could do was whining, whimpering, and begging you for more and more of your touch.

"you really want more baby ?", the smirk on your face was long gone, your panties now soaked with your juices as you kept on riding his thigh, breathing heavily and trying to keep your voice steady. "y-yes, please, please touch me more ! i need you so bad, please..."

his voice was quivering, almost like he was on the verge of tears, and you couldn't help but find that extremely cute, but also extremely hot. slowly, you let the hand that wasn't busy speeding up your movements around his cock travel up his body until you could reach his neck. you delicately traced the sides of it with your fingers before wrapping them around his throat.

"w-what are you doing ?"

you gave mingi's throat a little squeeze, watching with delight the way his eyes rolled back, the way he couldn't help but moan, the way his dick throbbed in your hand, the way he had to grip the sheets to ground himself in reality. the pleasure was starting to make him feel dizzy, his body too tired to hold back any longer.

"fuck baby ! 'm so close, please, please, please, can i cum ?"

his voice was laced with desperation, cutting himself with a whine every two words. and you couldn't help the rush of desire to cum that hit you right away at hearing him so pliant, so submissive.

"you've been such a good boy, go on, cum all over my hand."

and mingi surely did, thrusting his cock into your hand to follow your movements, until he covered your fingers with his sticky release. and that was really all he needed to relax after a long day at work.

"shit, that felt so good baby.". you replyed to his fucked out expression with a smirk, "yeah, i could tell."

and mingi's cheeks turned even more red, not knowing how to handle you being this attractive when you were taking control of his body. he watched you as you took some tissues to wipe your hand and his skin of his release, when it clicked in his head that he didn't even return the favor.

"don't you want me to take care of you too ?"

you settled back under the covers with your boyfriend wrapping your arms around his waist.

"oh don't worry, your thigh was enough."

and if mingi wasn't so exhausted right now, he would have gotten hard all over again at the thought of you cumming just like that.

#sub!mingi and a little bit of choking ??#yes please #eli answering your questions #eli's moots #dinna's asks #ateez hard thoughts #ateez hard hours #mingi hard thoughts #mingi hard hours #mingi smut #mingi x reader

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chuuyasheaven · 1 year ago

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"Thigh lover"— Dazai Osamu

"Dazai always loved your thighs, especially when they're in thigh highs. Whenever they are, he either goes on town on you or fucks the living daylights out of you, this time though it was neither but also everything of the above."

Tags: sub! Dazai Osamu / afab! Reader, face sitting, pet names, bratty? Dazai, pw/op, oral sex, slightly mean! Reader, edging???, pussydrunk! Dazai, squirting, degrading kink, everything is consented, overstimulation?, thigh fucking, Reader is thicc, he's whiny ong, idrk what I'm doing (again), ooc! Dazai, might contain grammar errors, rushed, short?, etc.

Notes: howdy, tryin' to keep up rn

All because he acted out, once again being bratty and annoying. So what's better than punishment? A punishment, which also could make you feel good. Then the perfect idea came up in your head. In this moment, Dazai's lips were making out with your cunt, while you were enjoying yourself. How is that an punishment, you ask? Well, he's not allowed to touch himself while he's eating you out, if he tries then—

"Mph—", you slightly closed your thighs together so his face would be squished. "I said no touching, did i?", you asked coldly, Dazai was only able to try to continue to eat you out, even though he couldn't since you closed your legs. "Don't make me repeat myself, brat.", you hissed at him pissed, your voice raspy at that, which made it harder to resist. ". . Yes,", he said muffled, you start to slightly smirk again. "Try to be good for once, dear, then maybe you could get what you want.", you stated, releasing Dazai from your grip. He almost immediately started getting back to where he was cut off. You grabbed his hair as he grabbed your thighs, holding onto them. He could tell that you were getting close, since he was good at it. Soon, it washed over you and you gushed onto his face, Dazai could've cum just then and there but he didn't.

As you came down from your first orgasm, Dazai spoke up. "Did I do good?", he asked while looking at you. You looked back at him smirked lightly. "Well, you did, but I don't think you really learned your lesson. .", he pouted at you, and you tried to think of something, because you couldn't stop there. Then another solution popped up. "If you wanna cum so bad, then fuck my thighs, baby.", Dazai's eyes lit up, he was willing to do anything to cum at least once. You got down from his face and sat down on the bed, while Dazai was unbuckling his belt. As you glanced at his boxers, you could see that he was leaking, look at how desperate he is! Parting your thighs a little so he had some space to slide into, he almost instantly slide in and you closed them together. Dazai bit his lip when he started to fuck your thighs, sliding in and out of them, already heavy breathing. "Feels good, doesn't it, slut?", Dazai nodded quickly while he soon to whimper quietly.

Dazai was slowly getting closer to his climax, his whimpers and whines getting louder. You had to admit, looking at him while he's so pathetically desperate had you dripping. But, you still didn't have any plans to have him cum, where's the fun in that? "Pleasepleaseplease—", he choked, you could feel him leaking more than before, meaning he was close to cumming, so parted your thighs for him to stop but also lose his orgasm. Dazai whined at this move of yours. "But I–i thought. . You said I could cum!", he whined, you looked at him rather cold again. "I didn't say it like that, besides, even if I said so I still didn't get an apology, 'Samu.", you corrected him, he was getting really frustrated with this. "Sorry.", he whispered quickly, did he think this was enough? "You can do better than this, can you? If you apologize to me and mean it, you can fuck me, alright? You know what I wanna hear, dear.", Dazai was ready to apologize genuinely just to feel your perfect cunt again, even the thought made his dick twitch.

Dazai looked down while starting off with his apology, starting to almost beg to feel your walls around him. "I'm s–sorry for acting out, I really didn't mean to annoy you. . Please, can you make me cum? I swear I'll be good f'you.", he said with a whiny tone, you smirked at him again and grabbed his chin to make him look at you. "You mean it, baby?", you cooed quite mockingly, he nodded. "Yes, please, need you so bad.", he was lowkey cute like this, so you accepted it, besides, you wanted to feel him inside you now. "Okay, if you really mean it, then I'll forgive you. You have my permission now.", you stated, Dazai's eyes lit up again, excitement visible within his eyes. You spread your legs enough for him, your pussy already wet enough for him to slide in, he could've sworn that he wanted to just cum of the sight. Dazai entered and already came right inside you, you let out a quiet moan of surprise. He already started to thrust now, he wasn't slow but also not rough, just somewhere in between.

It felt so good you could've sworn that you almost wanted to cum at this moment, but you tried to stay dominant. You tried really hard, but Dazai lifted your leg to reach deeper inside, whenever he pulled that trick you were a moaning mess. As his hips slapped against yours, the sound filling your bedroom, you were starting to lose control and started to moan with him. Then you felt your second orgasm near, when it washed over you Dazai came again stopping for a moment. You tried to catch your breath, but Dazai started to thrust again, trying to chase another orgasm. Dazai's face starting to get sweaty, his face flushed and slutty moans and whimpers leaving both of your lips. "F–fuck, Dazai. . Slow down—", your pleas fell on deaf ears, he was only able to fuck and pant heavily. Your legs were lifted again, Dazai placed on his hips to reach deeper inside you, which made you almost gush around his cock again. How did he manage to make this sensitive this quick? "Ah! D–dazai. .", you moaned, trying to calm him down but he was in a trance, he was pussydrunk now.

It was incredible, so much that you were nearing your third, but this one was feeling kind of weird. Dazai kept on thrusting inside you, already reaching to your clit to make you cum faster, which definitely did. When he trusted once more, you felt it coming, intense. "D–dazai, I'm close—" was the last thing you said before you squirted all over him, your juices gushing around him too. Open seeing this, Dazai moaned one last time before cumming inside you, twitching insanely a lot. You were out of breath and so was Dazai, he pulled out and your mixed juices leaked out of your cunt. He laid beside you, you moved over to him and got closer.

"This. . Was something else, 'donna."

This wasn't rlly abt thighs was it?

#Rei's Kinktober 2023 !! ❤️#dazai bungou stray dogs #dazai smut #bsd smut #bungo stray dogs smut #dazai x reader #bsd dazai #bottom dazai #clingy dazai #osamu dazai smut

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twistedwonderlandshenanigans · 7 months ago

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TWST Cast Mid-Effort Snacks They Make

Listen I'm no wizard in the kitchen but I think I can make some half decent snacks. That being said, this post is long, does not have accurate measurements for half of it, bc why the hell would I actually write stuff down I Totally Don't Forget Things All The Time.

Also like. mid-effort snacks. You know, you're not just Opening a bag of chips but you are going to need. At least a microwave. (also, using minimal dishes possible nobody wants to clean up). This is all stuff I've made or at least eaten, myself, lmk if you try it or if I missed a vital detail LMAO

ANYWAYS if this post is popular enough I'll share some like. Actual recipes as well, the Culinary Crucible thingy finally came in and I feel INSPIRED, some of these have little uhh like 'justification' or story behind them some don't bc I feel like it's obvious. GTAT refers to the section at the end, I got tired of writing it out over and over again sldkjhklsjdf ---------------------------------------------------

Heartslaybul

Riddle - (Dark) Chocolate Strawberry Bark

Materials and Ingredients: - Parchment paper - Cutting board/cookie tray - Microwave-safe bowl - Knife - Strawberries (it's okay if they're overripe, as long as you can still cut them safely) - (Dark) Chocolate chips or Nutella, your choice - Peanut butter - Sweetened condensed milk (scm) - Plastic container - Freezer

Instructions:

Cut your parchment paper to about the size of a cookie sheet, but really it depends on how many strawberries you're using (I do not remember how many I used, I think it was like 8, you do not need many, especially if you cut them really thin) and put on top of cutting board/cookie sheet. A flexible cutting board is best, but it's whatever fits in your freezer.

Destem your strawberries and slice them thinly while they're standing upright. Like the part you destemmed is against the parchment paper. (or cutting board but y'know. Why Dirty It). Place them laying down on the parchment paper as close to each other as possible. I found like. Fitting the triangle shapes together like teeth was the easiest way but something else might work better for you. Dice one or two strawberries and set aside.

In a bowl, measure out about a cup of chocolate. If it seems like too much, you can just. eat it ig or dip leftover strawberries into it like I did. If it's not enough, babe just add more it's okay lmao. If you're using chocolate chips, add some sort of fat before you microwave (any oil, lard/Crisco, butter, margarine, etc.) in fifteen second intervals. (if you don't have a microwave, there are instructions under 'General tips and tricks' to hopefully help!). If you're using Nutella, just pop that bad boy in there for fifteen second intervals. In both cases, mix in between intervals until it's kind of runny.

Pour chocolate evenly over the strawberries, at least enough to cover them completely from the top/fill any gaps that are present. Wash the bowl, and repeat the process with peanut butter.

This is optional I really like chocolate and think it's more aesthetically pleasing than peanut butter, but peanut butter doesn't harden as well as chocolate does to bind the strawberry layer together so I couldn't put it first. I did another layer of chocolate on top, but it was thinner than the original one.

Sprinkle diced strawberries on top, and drizzle SCM to your hearts content. (Any leftover SCM needs to be put into a separate container and can stay in your fridge for up to 3 weeks).

Freeze it. It's just faster this way and helps the peanut butter out. I left mine in there for a day, but I think it's okay after like an hour, idk, you decide.

Snap/cut your bark into smaller pieces, use the parchment paper to help line whatever container you're going to use and store your treat in there. I enjoyed these treats best frozen or on top of vanilla ice cream, but they do need to be kept at least refrigerated. Fair warning, if you're a slow eater, these will get messy if you wait too long slkdjfhlkjsdfsdf recommend you eat with a fork.

THE REST ARE UNDER THE CUT WOOT WOOT (Riddle's is easily one of the higher effort ones, so do not be dismayed! There are some on this list with only 2 ingredients, I just talk a lot LMAO)

Trey - Tanghulu No baking required, still satisfies his sweet tooth.

Materials and Ingredients: - Stove (someone said you can use a microwave, IIIIII don't Like That for this, but I'm sure you can) - Fruit (doesn't really matter what kind. I used kiwis, strawberries, and grapefruit.) - White sugar - Water - Bowl of ice water - Fork (skewers are better but I didn't have any, and toothpicks...don't fw toothpicks for this okay??) - Parchment paper\Plate (you just need to make sure it's hardened BEFORE you put the fruit on it kdfjhsfjkd)

Instructions:

Ensure your fruit is washed/dried, peeled or otherwise "ready to eat" before starting

Use a 2:1 sugar to water ratio and put it in a pot. (So 2 cups of sugar to 1 cup of water, or a more likely amount you'll actually use up is 1 cup of sugar to 1/2 cup of water)

Heat on medium and watch closely, it's not suggested you mix it, I did, just by swirling the pot to make sure all the sugar was in the water, but then I left it alone. You'll see it starting to change colour to yellow-y rather than clear. Use a spoon/fork to dip into the sugar mixture and then immediately into the bowl of ice water. If it appears stringy or is still soft and sticky to touch, it's not ready yet. Keep boiling until your test drop solidifies on contact/within seconds of being in the ice water.

Turn the heat down slightly and use your fork or skewer to poke your fruit, and dip carefully into sugar mixture. Immediately, (but carefully) place your sugar covered fruit into the ice bowl. Once you take it out, it should only take a moment to harden before you place it on a plate/parchment paper.

Intended to be eaten immediately, does not store very well. Check 'general tips and tricks' for how to clean the pot/fork

Cater - Spicy Garlic Cheese Bread

Materials and Ingredients: - French Bread (works the best, but you can use whatever bread you have on hand) or premade garlic bread - Butter/Margarine - Salad herbs (like the premade mix or whatever, other seasonings optional) - (Shredded) Cheese - Jalapenos - Other toppings + hot sauce (optional) - Bowl - Spoon - Microwave - Oven

Instructions:

If using premade garlic bread, skip to step 3. Otherwise, get your bowl and chunk of butter (if using french bread, I would say about a half cup) and pop it in the microwave just long enough to get it soft, but not melted. Measure salad herbs with your heart and mix with a spoon.

Cut your bread in half and slather that son of a bitch in butter, having worked in a bakery I know that premade garlic bread literally gets a Handful of "butter" (it's margarine) that just gets. Slathered onto half of a day-old French bread loaf. (Safeway. Looking at you.) If you want to try putting on some BBQ sauce or tomato sauce now would be your time to add it. If you are adding sauce, a little less butter is recommended otherwise it will get Soggy

Put on as much cheese as you want. Whatever cheese you want. I'm not the boss of you.

Throw on jalapenos and any other toppings you want. (red onions, bell peppers, make it a meal with some chicken or something idk)

Broil on high until It Looks Right, as in the cheese is melted and golden brown in some areas (assuming it's marble cheese), or wrap in aluminum foil (risky with The Cheese) and bake at 350 F for like 10 minutes (I still recommend baking over broiling but it's your choice bestie)

Drizzle with hot sauce if you want/any other condiments.

French bread is pretty big, so cut into smaller pieces and share with friends/family/your neighbour/ whatever or full send it or you can try to store it, I think once it's cooled, a plastic bag would be the best bet for storage, and only for a day or two before your bread gets Sad.

Deuce - Ants on a Log He used to love it when his mom would send him to school with these.

Materials and Ingredients: - Cutting board (unless you would like to be a heathen like me) - Knife - Celery - Peanut butter - Raisins/Chocolate chips/Cereal/whatever you want

Instructions:

Decide if you even want to bother cutting your celery, you can leave it whole if you really want.

If you want to cut your celery, cut it according to taste or break that motherfucker with your bare hands just to hear it snap and get that little bit of Emotion and satisfaction out of it. Not recommended if you want bite sized pieces. Generally only cut in a way that keeps the 'sides' of the celery in tact, like you should have a little 'dip' to put peanut butter in, but its ok if its not comfortable to eat it that way and you need to cut it vertically as well, nbd, BUT DON'T CUT IT THAT WAY YET it's so much harder to get the peanut butter on.

Use a butter knife to add peanut butter to your celery. It should fill the little valley in between the sides of the stalk. **Now would be the time to cut again if you want Planks if you know what I mean

Add your toppings, be it raisins, chocolate chips, etc. along the peanut butter to represent the ants slkdjhflksjdf

Ace - Oreo Mug Cake His brother showed him once and he didn't stop since.

Materials and Ingredients: - Oreos - Milk - Fork - Microwave safe mug - Microwave - Whipped Cream (optional)

Instructions:

Get your mug.

Throw 4-6 Oreos in. (4 for an 8 ounce mug, more for a bigger one) and soak in 1 less tablespoon of milk than the amount of cookies you put in. (so 3 tbs for an 8 ounce mug)

The longer you soak them, the easier it is to crush them and break them up, it should become kind of cakey texture already

Pop that bad boy in the microwave for a minute, and in 20 second intervals after that as necessary. Its not like it matters if it's 'raw' though.

Let it cool until you can handle the mug comfortably, add whipped cream or other toppings and enjoy!

Savanaclaw

Leona - Bacon Wrapped Sausages

Materials and Ingredients: - Baking dish (should have some depth to it) - Parchment paper - Cocktail sausages - Bacon - Scissors/Knife - Toothpicks - Brown sugar (optional) - Oven

Instructions:

Cut your bacon in half

Preheat your oven to 350 F. Roll up cocktail sausage in half a rasher of bacon and secure in place with a toothpick.

Place parchment paper in/on baking dish and place the rolls inside

Once you've prepared as many as you'd like, you can sprinkle brown sugar on top.

Bake for about an hour

Ruggie - Elote Loco (Mexican street corn/ 'crazy corn')

Materials and Ingredients: - Canned corn - Mayo - Lemon/Lime - Salt - Pepper - Cayenne - Bowl

Instructions:

Drain your corn can, then add corn to your bowl

Literally. Add everything else according to taste. Heat if you want to, or put in the fridge to eat cold. (I like it cold).

Jack - Fruit Leather (this is a higher-effort, more time-consuming recipe)

Materials and Ingredients - Cutting board (not optional this time :/) - Knife/Corer (if applicable) - Stove - Large saucepan - Water - Blender/Potato Masher - Lemon/Sugar/Cinnamon/Nutmeg, Etc. (optional, but recommended) - Parchment paper - Baking tray - Oven - Pizza cutter (makes things easier, not necessary)

Instructions:

Prepare your fruit. (Wash, peel, destem, core them, remove pits, etc.)

Chop into chunks, and simmer in 1/2 cup of water for every 4 cups of fruit while covered for 10-20 minutes, or until fruit is cooked. You can mash by hand or just go ahead and transfer everything to a blender, but you will have to transfer back into the pot after.

Taste, and add sugar/lemon/spices according to your preference.

Simmer and stir until everything is mixed in completely and the puree has thickened. (5-10 minutes)

Preheat oven to 140 F (check GTAT at the end for troubleshooting). Puree thoroughly in a blender/food processor.

Line baking tray and pour puree evenly onto it, it should be about 1/4 inch thick. Bake for 8-12 hours.

Use pizza cutter to cut into smaller pieces. You can cut the parchment paper underneath and roll the pieces accordingly to store.

This is a more labour intensive snack, BUT it keeps for sooo long. It can keep at room temp in ziploc bag for a month. In the fridge for 6 months. In the freezer for a year. Also a really good way to use overripe fruit.

Octavinelle

Azul - Funnel Cakes >:D (I had to look up a recipe to base the measurements off of, I did not memorize this, but I changed a few things when I Actually Made them)

Materials and Ingredients: - Stove - Large pan - Oil (Vegetable oil, but I think coconut or sunflower oil should work too if you have certain restrictions) - 1/4 cup Milk - 1 Egg - 1 tbsp Water - Splash of Vanilla extract (splash is generally between a 1/4 tsp and 1 tsp To Me) - White sugar (to taste) - 3/4 tsp Baking powder - Pinch of Salt - 1/2 cup Flour - Powdered sugar (to taste) - Cinnamon (to taste) - Plate - Paper towel - Large measuring cup - Fork or tongs - Other toppings (optional)

Instructions:

Throw all the Wet ingredients into the large measuring cup and whisk

Add sugar, cinnamon, salt, and baking powder, whisk until combined

Add oil to pan and start heating on medium, it should be about an inch deep to deep fry. Add flour to measuring cup and whisk until smooth.

(Refer to GTAT at the end to know when oil is hot enough). Use the measuring cup to drizzle the batter in a line around the pan and overlap as desired. Honestly, the thicker the lines the better imo. Cook for 2 minutes until golden brown, then flip and repeat.

Once cooked, move carefully to plate with paper towel to soak up the oil, and add powdered sugar on top. Add other toppings as desired.

Jade - Roasted Chickpeas Easy protein to bring on a hike

Materials and Ingredients: - Can of chickpeas - Baking tray - Parchment paper - Olive oil - Seasoning as you wish (Personal recommendation: garlic powder, salt, paprika, pepper and a little cayenne) - Oven

Instructions:

Line a baking tray with parchment paper and preheat your oven to 400 F.

Drain your can of chickpeas, rinse, then drain again. Try and dry them out a bit before you season them, either leaving them in a colinder or letting them sit out on paper towels or a cloth...or on the tray if you've got time to kill. **If you don't like the feeling of oil on your hands, you might have an extra dish to wash but thats okay. Add your chickpeas to a glass bowl before the next step.

Transfer chickpeas to the tray (if you're not using the bowl) and coat with a generous amount of oil. Add seasonings as you wish, then mix with your hands (or a spoon if you're using the bowl, then transfer to the tray.)

Bake for 20-30 minutes, shaking the pan gently about every 10 minutes to help rotate the chickpeas. Once they're golden brown and crunchy, they're done.

Best eaten straight away, but you can keep them in container for a few days.

Floyd - Trail Mix (AKA the ADHD snack Ever imo)

Materials and Ingredients - Anything you got in your pantry that already kinda qualifies as a snack food - Something to put it in (bag or bowl/container with a lid is preferable) - My favourite mix to make is granola, cranberries, raisins, and chocolate chips

Instructions

Grab your materials

If you're using something that should probably cut up, (like fruit by the foot or something idk) just rip it and throw it in the Container.

Mix everything in a bowl or bag. Use more of your Favourite Ingredient than everything else, then close your storage thing.

Shake that motherfucker

Put everything back (or do this As You Add it so you're left with nothing to clean up at the end)

Scarabia

Kalim - The Forbidden (I made this when I was like 6 for a week straight after school, I DO NOT recommend) He came up with this as a midnight snack and didn't want to bother Jamil.

Materials and Ingredients - Microwave - Microwave safe bowl - Chocolate chips - Mini marshmallows - Fork - A very high tolerance for Texture and Sweetness

Instructions:

Put chocolate chips and marshmallows in the bowl

Microwave for 15 second intervals, mixing with your fork in between.

When it becomes a sticky amalgamation from hell and looks like a dung beetle would be proud of it, it's done.

Jamil - Fattoush He saves the leftovers of the dishes he makes for Kalim throughout the day in order to make some version of Fattoush

Materials and Ingredients: - Cutting board - Knife + Pizza cutter (not necessary, but fun) - Lettuce - Tomato - Cucumber - Radishes - Pita bread - Pan - Stove - Olive oil - Salt + pepper - Bowl x 2 - Glass measuring cup - Lemon juice - Garlic powder, dried mint, and sumac (you don't have to use these) - (I like adding Granny smith apples and goat or feta cheese, but it's not traditional)

Instructions:

Cut up your veggies like you would for any salad and throw em in a bowl

Use the pizza cutter to slice pita bread into smaller, bite sized pieces.

Fry the pieces with a little bit of olive oil, salt and pepper, then set aside in a different bowl so they stay Crunchy

In the glass measuring cup use about 2 tbsp of lemon juice, add some garlic powder, dried mint, salt, pepper, sumac, and whisk.

Slowly stream in about 3 tbsp of olive oil and whisk continuously until it combines. (this might take a while to emulsify, yes you can use a hand mixer on low if you want)

Drizzle dressing over your salad portion, and add pita chips as you wish

Pomefiore

Vil - Parfait He let the French man into his life, also this is bougie parfait, you don't have to follow this exactly lmao, this is just how I used to make it for my mom

Materials and Ingredients - Cutting board + knife - Grapes, red and green if possible - Granola - Blueberries (they can be frozen) - Cherries, cored/halved except one (can also be frozen) - Yogurt (I prefer vanilla for this stuff, Vil probably uses plain Greek yogurt and some honey for sweetness) - A wine glass, otherwise just a clear glass makes it look best, but it doesnt really matter - Spoon

Instructions:

Dice those grapes as small or large as you like, mine are generally the size of like. The eraser end of a pencil. Set aside.

Get your glass and gently spoon yogurt into the bottom, up by about 2 inches. If you have the patience, gently arrange the blueberries into a 1 berry layer. If not, just grab less than a handful of blueberries and put them on top of the yogurt.

Add another inch of yogurt to completely cover the berry layer, and add a thin layer of granola. Cover completely with yogurt again, using another inch-2 inches to do so

Again, if you have the patience, you can arrange your cherry halves into a nice circle to completely cover the yogurt layer. If not, do the same thing as the blueberries.

Cover with another inch-two inches of yogurt. Add a thicker band of granola this time, and top with yogurt once more, to nearly the top of the glass.

Add your whole cherry to the middle of the parfait, and add the mix of diced grapes around it. ** if you used frozen fruit, let it thaw for a couple minutes so you can see the colour bleed into the yogurt a bit bc it looks cool. I'm the boss of you for this one rule because I'm right about it sdlkjfhsldjkf

Rook - Maakouda A guilty pleasure of his. He remembers them fondly from home. Works best with leftover mashed potatoes.

Materials and Ingredients: - Mashed potatoes (if you don't have left overs, just boil chunked potatoes in lightly salted water. Once they're soft, drain them, use a handmixer to mix, add some butter/whipping cream, season as you wish (garlic powder, salad herbs, salt, pepper), add shredded cheese if you want idc. Once everything is mixed you got yourself. Mashies.) - Egg - Garlic, Parsley, Cumin, Tumeric, Salt, Pepper - Flour in a bowl - Oil - Pan - Stove** - you can use an air-fryer for this if you want - Slotted spoon/tongs/fork - Plate w/ paper towel

Instructions:

For every 2 cups of mashed potatoes, you will add one egg, but don't do it yet. Add seasoning to your mashed potatoes first so you can taste and adjust the flavour as necessary, THEN add your egg(s).

Start heating oil, (about 2 inches) in a pan at medium heat. While you wait for it to get to temperature, (Look at GTAT to know when the oil is hot enough) roll your potato mixture into small balls and roll in flour

Fry until golden. Remove from oil using your utensil of choice and let it drain on the paper towel

Repeat until all the "batter" is used up

Epel - Dulce de Leche + Apple Slices Ruggie showed it to him

Materials and Ingredients - Sweetened Condensed Milk (if you don't just have dulce de leche on hand) - Apples (Granny Smith recommended) - Two glass baking pans, one larger than the other - Water - Oven

Instructions:

Preheat oven to 425 F

Pour SCM into smaller glass pan, cover with foil

Place smaller glass pan into larger glass pan. Fill the larger glass pan with as much water as necessary to cover the level of SCM in the smaller pan

Throw it in the oven for like 2 hours and monitor periodically to refill with water if necessary. Keep cooking until it's the colour golden brown you want

Once it's to colour, remove from oven carefully, remove foil, and remove from larger glass pan carefully.

Once cool enough, store in glass jar if possible, or wait longer and store it in a plastic container.

Cut up apple and whatever is left in the pan, scrape it out with the apple and eat it lmaooo unless you have a silicone spatula ain't no way you getting all that caramel out of the pan. Serve yourself more as necessary lmao

Ignihyde

Idia - Worms and Dirt Baybeeeeeeee The far less healthy version of a parfait

Materials and Ingredients: - Crushed Oreos (Oreos + double bagged ziploc bags and you Gamer Rage sldfhlskdjfhlsj) - Whipped Cream - (If making from scratch, you'll need whipping cream, vanilla, and powdered sugar + hand mixer. Just throw ingredients in to taste and mix) - Chocolate pudding - Gummy worms - Rolling pin (optional) - Mixing bowl (glass or metal preferable) - Spatula - (Clear) Glass

Instructions:

Crush the Oreo's by any means necessary. Obliterate them.

Pack the Oreo remains into the bottom of your cup

Mix your whipped cream with the chocolate pudding using the spatula to fold it into each other until it Tastes Right. That is subjective, so if you Like it and it's Brown you Did It.

Spoon/plap how much of your chocolate mousse you'd like into your cup. Throw in a couple gummy worms, add more oreo corpse if you want then fill to the top with chocolate mousse.

Top with more oreo ashes and more gummy worms

Leftover mousse is pretty versatile if you have it with fruit or make more worms and dirt, but it only keeps for a day or two in the fridge

Ortho - :(

Diasomnia

Malleus - "Snow Cone"

Materials and Ingredients: - Rage - Double or triple ziploc bags - Ice - Hot water - Grenadine, Maple syrup, Lime and salt, something else (Choose ONE per serving or embrace Lilia's energy and regret it) - A bowl + spoon

Instructions:

Double/triple bag ice

Run bags under hot water for a few minutes to help melt the ice a little bit (assuming you don't have already very small pieces of ice)

Crush the ice via brute force (its a good work out) OR I GUESS you could use a BLENDER but where's the fun in that

Get rid of any extra water and serve very finely crushed ice in a bowl

Top with your desired flavouring to taste

Lilia -

REDACTED

Silver - Refried Beans Another Ruggie special lmao I love him so much

Materials and Ingredients: - Canned black beans - Salsa (optional) - Chicken bouillon - Oil - Pan/Stove - Wooden spoon/potato masher - Chips or some sort of bread

Instructions:

Drain a little more than half of the Bean Juice

Over medium heat, add a little bit of oil to the pan, (enough to cover the bottom), and add the Beans

As it heats up and the remaining Bean Juice starts to bubble, add chicken bouillon and salsa to taste.

Mash the beans while they cook to mix in flavouring and to get beans to the right consistency. They'll be done when there's no liquid left sloshing around, but you can decide how Dry you want your beans

Add beans on top of tortilla chips, sprinkle cheese on top and call it done, throw some in a burrito or on top of salad, lightly toast some bread, put some mayo on it and add the beans, do what you want <3

Sebek - Salmon Croquettes

Materials and Ingredients: - Canned salmon - Diced bell peppers (choose your favourite colours)**go to GTAT for other substitutions and notes - Diced red onion - Egg (if you don't have any just add more mayo) - Worcestershire sauce - Mayo - Garlic powder, salt, pepper, paprika, other seasonings (your choice) -Bowl - Flour - Panko (optional, or substitute bread crumbs) - Oil - Stove/Pan - Tongs (you can try to use a fork but it won't always work lol) - Plate w/paper towel

Instructions:

Prepare your veggies, and drain salmon

Mix in with canned salmon, and add mayo, Worcestershire, and seasonings to taste. Add just a tiny bit more than you think you should in regards to spices because when you throw the flour in, it'll 'dilute' the flavour a bit

Lightly beat 1 egg for every 5 ounces of salmon (should be on the can) and add to mixture, using hands or wooden spoon to mix.

Add just enough flour and breadcrumbs to the mixture that it doesn't stick to your hands.

Set up your pan with oil, (just enough to cover the bottom), over medium heat and make little 'patties' out of your mix.

Fry your patties until golden brown (2-3 minutes) on both sides.

Remove from heat and place on plate to drain.

Staff

Crowley - Fuckit Fudge (AKA Rocky Road Fudge)

Materials and Ingredients: - Parchment paper - Cake pan - 2 cups Chocolate chips - SCM (14 oz = 1 3/4 cups, should be on the can) - 1/4 cup Butter - Vanilla - Marshmallows - Almonds - Anything else you want (just be aware you'll have to add more chocolate and you'll likely have to cut down on the other fillings as well) - Glass bowl - Spatula - Microwave/Double boiler (GTAT tells you how to make one) - Patience

Instructions:

Melt chocolate chips, SCM, and butter (about 90 seconds in the microwave)

While it's melting, set up your cake pan with parchment paper

Add a splash of vanilla extract and mix with spatula until smooth

Stir add-ins into mixture, and pour into cake pan carefully

Make sure mixture is spread evenly, and refrigerate until it solidifies (depends on how deep you made the fudge)

Cut into chunks and serve. Stores well in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 2 weeks.

Trein - Raspberry Cordial Not a 'snack' but like if the Shaftlands are known for ruby berries I feel like this is close enough. It's from Anne of Green Gables, shhh its soooo good

Materials and Ingredients - Raspberries (GASP can you believe it) - Lemon/lemon juice - White sugar - Water - Sparkling water/Ginger Ale works too. Sprite is a stretch. - Pot/Stove - Fine mesh strainer - Pitcher - Ladle - Glass measuring cup

Instructions:

We're making a raspberry syrup, so you can use fresh, overripe or frozen raspberries. For every cup of raspberries, use just under a half cup of sugar, (3 cups of raspberries = 1 1/4 cups of sugar), and put both into a pot/saucepan.

Cook on medium/high heat and mash with like. the bottom of a ladle or something. It'll take like 20 minutes to have it cooked down to a liquid.

Strain into the measuring cup. If there are still seeds or pulp, strain again. Squeeze lemon into it in small amounts and taste as you go until you get the flavour You Want. This is your syrup. At this point, if you want to save some to use for other recipes or something, set some aside.

Boil the water (Use one cup more of water than you did of raspberries) and add it to the pitcher with your raspberry syrup. Mix, then let it chill in the fridge. ** if you would like to use sparkling water/lemonade or ginger ale instead, you'll just have to mix for longer is all, don't heat those

Serve and garnish with lemon or mint.

Crewel - Carrot Salad idk man I'm running out of steam and ideas lmaoooo

Materials and Ingredients: - Carrots, peeled - Grater - Bowl - Lemon, salt, cayenne - Fork

Instructions:

Grate your carrots into the bowl you're gonna eat out of

Squeeze your shredded carrots to get rid of the extra Juice (look at GTAT)

Add lemon/lime, salt and cayenne according to taste, and mix with fork

Tastes best chilled, eat immediately

Vargas - Deviled Eggs

Materials and Ingredients: - Saucepan/pot + Stove - Water - Eggs - Mayo - Salt, pepper, paprika, cayenne - Bowl + fork - Lime juice (optional) - Knife and cutting board - Bowl with ice water

Instructions:

Choose how many eggs you're gonna want to make, idk, maybe 6? Put them in the pot and gently fill with just enough water to cover them. Add salt and lemon juice (GTAT) to the water and heat on medium

Prepare your bowl with ice water. Let your eggs boil for about 8 minutes before draining the water and running them under cold water until they're cool enough to handle for a few seconds to put in the ice bath

Wait until your eggs are cold enough to handle for you to crack the egg shells off. I love using my hands but if it's easier to put it in a container with a lid and shake it gently, go ahead, just shake it enough to break the shell in a way you can remove it.

Once all your eggs are shelled, cut them in half the long way, (be careful they are Slippery)

Remove the yolks gently without ripping the egg white. Generally, you can just use your fingers or turn the egg upside down orrr very gently push the yolk out from behind into the bowl.

Add mayo and seasonings at your discretion. (if it feels like it's missing something, you can try adding diced pickles/pickle juice, bacon bits, dill, or mustard.) Mash together with the fork until smooth, or if you're using a lot of eggs you can use a hand mixer. Mixture should be creamy.

Gently spoon the mixture back into the egg whites. Any leftover mixture will be great on sandwiches!

Sam - Sausage Bites

Materials and Ingredients: - 1 Pillsbury OG Crescent Roll dough - Sausage of your choice, cut into 1 inch pieces (unless it's cocktail sausages, leave them as is) - 1 Egg + 1tbsp for an egg wash - Baking sheet + parchment paper (oven) - Flour - Pizza cutter (more fun than a knife) - Plate w/ paper towel - Sauce: 1/2 cup Mayo, 1 tbsp mustard, 1 tbsp ketchup + Cajun seasoning to your hearts content or a simple chipotle mayo works too

Instructions:

Make your sauce, throw it in the fridge to cool, set your oven to 350 F.

Lightly flour your counter and spread out the Pillsbury dough. Cut each triangle into 3 smaller triangles. Place sausage on wide end of the triangle and wrap it to make kind of like. A donut around it.

Place on baking sheet and add egg wash. I don't have a basting brush so I kinda wing it with whatever bright idea strikes me first. Usually I just end up using my fingers lol

Bake for 15 minutes, until pastry is golden brown

Once done, place on plate and allow to cool. Add toothpicks if you'd like, and serve with your dip.

Others (BONUS, come on guys I'm pretending like this is something people actually want to read LMAO)

Jack T. - Vanilla Latte Bars

Materials and Ingredients: - Coffee beans - Vanilla - Pitted dates - Rolled oats - Food processor - Cake pan + parchment paper

Instructions:

For every cup of oats, match with pitted dates + 1/2 a cup. (2 cups oats = 2 1/2 cups of dates). For every cup of oats, add a 1/8 cup of coffee beans. (2 cups oats = 1/4 cup coffee beans). Add vanilla with your heart. Everything goes in the food processor and gets blended.

Pinch the 'dough' between your fingers. If it doesn't crumble, it's ready. If it does, add a splash of warm water, blend again, and repeat until the dough holds it's shape.

Press mixture into cake pan evenly and refrigerate

Cut and serve once hardened

Che'nya - Cheez-whiz, pickle and mini-marshmallow sandwich Oh, context? Yeah my dad said this was his childhood snack and I wanted to be like him when I was like 5. Do not recommend. But I also don't like processed cheese.

Materials and Ingredients - White bread, Wonder bread is ideal - Cheez-whiz - Sweet pickles, sliced - Multi coloured mini marshmallows - A psych assessment

Instructions:

You don't get help with this. You know what you're doing.

Falena - Chicharrones (Like. Pork bites.)

Materials and Ingredients: - Cutting board + knife - Pork cutlet (I only need to feed myself, so a huge cut of meat isn't necessary - Salt - Baking tray + parchment paper (oven)

Instructions:

Preheat oven to 350 F.

Cut your pork cut into ~1 inch cubes, or smaller. Place on baking sheet and use a generous amount of salt to season. Mix with your hands.

Cook until you can easily pull the pork apart

I like to use a little lemon, a little homemade tortilla and some crema to eat them, but just lemon or using them to top nachos works too

Cheka - Poor Man's Horchata He just likes it more because he can set it up mostly by himself, and he can share it without worrying about nut allergies.

Materials and Ingredients - Pitcher - Water - White sugar - Oats - Vanilla - Cinnamon - Ice - Wooden spoon

Instructions:

For every cup of oats, add half a cup of sugar into pitcher (or cup for a personal serving)

Bring 3/4 full with water and add ice to bring it as high as you are comfortable stirring.

Add remaining ingredients to taste, and add sugar/water/oats as necessary

Najma - Mango with Tajin

Materials and Ingredients - Cutting board and knife - Mango - Tajin - Bowl

Instructions:

Cut your mango however you like. I typically cube my Haden mangoes, but Ataulfo I do the grid thing and pop it up

Add Tajin to your preference. If you don't have Tajin, use lime, salt and cayenne.

Neige (and the dwarves) - Tarte Soleil (higher effort snack) It's easy to share and 'sun tart' feels fitting

Materials and Ingredients: - 2 puff pastries, cut into equal size circles - Egg for wash, like Sam's - Black and white sesame seeds, (Optional) - Garlic butter (softened butter w/ garlic powder, salt, lemon and parsley to taste) - Baking sheet + parchment paper (oven) - Water - Cup/Glass - Knife

Instructions:

Cut your puff pastry so it's just small enough to fit on your baking sheet. Leave one on the sheet and put the other in the fridge for now. Preheat your oven to 350 F.

Spread the garlic butter on the circle, leaving about a half inch untouched all the way around the circle. Place in the fridge for 5 minutes to set.

Dab the edges of the crust with water and set the other puff pastry on top, gently pressing the edges together (not squishing)

Put the glass smack dab in the middle, or at least best you can, and upside down. (Do not Press.) Use your knife to cut away from the glass and make a bunch of 'rays' (easiest way is to quarter the dough, then cut each quarter into sixths.)

Remove the glass and gently press where your 'ray' meets the circle the glass made to prevent it from ripping as you twist it. Repeat for every 'ray'

Egg wash, (just like Sam's), sprinkle sesame seeds and bake until golden brown (30-35 minutes)

Let it cool, transfer to serving plate, and rip off the rays to eat.

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GENERAL TIPS AND TRICKS

If you need to melt chocolate and don't have a microwave (been there love, I know), you can use a small pot with water in it, I would say about a third of the pot is good, and a glass bowl big enough to sit on top of it. Boil that motherfucker and melt chocolate in the glass bowl, this is basically a poor man's double boiler

To clean melted sugar from the pot, there's a couple ways to go about it. I can't relax when I know there are dishes still waiting for me, so I used my kettle to boil more water, poured it into the pot, mixed it around with the fork I used, and most of it dissolved. I poured it down the sink, then used a sponge, soap and brute force to get the rest of it out. The other option is similar, where you just add fresh water to what's left of the sugar mixture, let it sit overnight, boil it again, and then dump it. (don't use cold water it will harden against the pot and be even more difficult to clean)

Some oven's don't go that low, I think the other common lowest temp is 170 F. That's okay! You can use a pair of metal tongs to keep your oven slightly ajar, just check in on it every once in a while. I use the same trick when I make meringue cookies and it works perfectly. Makes it wonderful during winter, but in summer make sure you don't overheat love <3.

You'll know the oil is hot enough to deep fry if you 1. put the back end of a wooden spoon in the oil and bubbles form around it, or 2. drop a small bit of the batter/flour in and it starts bubbling.

If you don't like bell peppers, you can shred carrots or zucchini, just make sure you squeeze and drain out the water first. You can do this with a cheese cloth or just your hands and pouring the water/juice out of the bowl over the sink. The dryer you can get it the better.

Adding lemon juice to the water helps separate the shell from the egg

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I did this shit in like 8 hours gooooooooooooooooooooooooood I hope it doesn't flop. But if it does, I hope whoever it does reach, enjoys it, I had fun making it.

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