#I'm relatively happy with it now
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Pokemon AU Part 2: featuring my little scrunklies, the Ashen Wolves
#fe3h#fire emblem 3 houses#Arianell's fe3h Pokémon AU#ashen wolves#yuri leclerc#hapi#constance von nuvelle#balthus von albrecht#full disclosure: most of this was finished like 2 weeks ago but then i got burn out#I did some other drawings and learned some new shading techniques and then finished this one#I'm relatively happy with it now#but i think I'm gonna have to do more doodle stuff in between releasing these bigger pieces#cuz this was a lot
184 notes
·
View notes
Text
anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...
#not a shitpost#serious post#ask to tag#tw trauma#cptsd#c-ptsd#and if so we should TALK about it#because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays#like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc#bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times#and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd)#because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact#2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc#3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation#and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie#4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories#and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong#weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards#i got lucky there#also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons
4K notes
·
View notes
Note
You have inspired me to start making reading comprehension questions for a server’s political memes channel. Do you have any tips to make good questions, or pitfalls to avoid?
I did want to answer this ask but I waited a bit until I had more actual posts queued before doing so
When I'm doing my gimmick, the first question I ask myself is, "taken completely literally at face value, what is this post saying?" Then, I ask, "what does this post actually mean?" or, alternatively, "what was the reason that this post was made?"
Of course that is not necessarily the best way to do it or the only valid way, it's just the easiest way for me to start breaking a post apart.
I also try to lead a hypothetical person who is reading my questions to try and think about things in a way that would help them understand the post. For instance, on the nsfw snow post I tried to direct my hypothetical answerer into understanding that the one image that was removed was probably due to copyright issues with the photographer as opposed to some algorithm gone awry that thought the snow was porn, which can be verified by checking the notes of the post.
#not reading comprehension questions#ask#self post#for the extra bit of stuff i'm going to take the opportunity to say in the tags here#it seems that the (relative) happiness i had around the start of this year was actually an anomaly and not the start of an upward trend#the whole depression thing has become my new normal and i am fighting to try and whether the storm#maybe one day i will have the energy to maintain this blog consistently again but that reality seems further and further away each day now#i have no plans to go on long-term hiatus but this isn't going to be a once-a-day thing for a bit at this rate
215 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm actually shocked and amazed that Florida did not pass Amendment 3 to legalize marijuana. I'm so proud of y'all
#I'm proud of everybody#I'm proud of my friends from Michigan and my relatives in Pennsylvania#I'm proud of Georgia and the Puerto Ricans in Osceola County#I'm proud of Gen Z and the great state of Texas#and I'm so happy for everybody. even the rabid Harris supporters. you may not be pleased now. but you're about to be#when you can afford LIVING again#and there's world PEACE again#x#respublica
95 notes
·
View notes
Text
can't wait til I start this stupid job so I won't have to be doing commissions all the fucking time to buy groceries, this shut sucks the joy out of art so much. I wanna be drawing ultrakill stuff & personal art & doing crafts & reading books but every time I sit down to do something for me I'm thinking about the fact that I should be doing commissions. I'm so glad I didn't go into art as an actual career, I would hate myself so much forever
#i just want art to be able to be a hobby again aaaaa#i can talk about it here bc nobody who's commissioning me knows this is my blog. ive gotten like 2 commissions off tumblr ever lmfao#and tbh i am tired of pretending to be enthusiastic about drawing other peoples ocs. im so tired of customer service voice#im not gonna lie most of the time i do not care about your blorbo. i'm glad you're having fun im happy for u but i just need money#im happy you like my art enough to pay for it but im so TIRED#being self employed sucks like yeah i can choose my own hours but im also always thinking 'i could be working now' and i HATE IT#i don't wanna make it sound like i'm gonna starve or anything I can ask my parents for money if i really need to#im not like in genuine poverty or the biggest victim of capitalism here i just have a family that's deeply unpleasant to interact with#but im starting a half-time job at the university physics department at the end of the month and that'll be enough to cover Being Alive!!!#and will also hopefully be something i am genuinely interested in & enjoy with people who seem relatively cool#(they're gonna let me into the machine shop!! im gonna get to build things!! they were genuinely interested in my robotics experience!!)#so once art stops being the Thing Temporarily Feeding Me i'm hoping i'll be able to draw more fun stuff again. & maybe even enjoy comms#it's somehow easier to be enthusiastic about commissions when i know the money will be going to buy a Cool Sword instead of food
49 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm so lucky I have the ability to ENJOY things, I'm so lucky to know what my favourite music or food is and having access to both.
#I've been feeling really happy recently completely out of the blue#Hopefully it's within a norm but now that I typed it I see that it's kind of suspicious of me#I've seen psychosis that started from similar sentiments in one of my relatives#given how little to no sleep I get it's entirely possible I'm heading into this direction#but I hope my self awareness and familiarity with the topic will help me recognise it if I happen to acquire more suspicious thoughts#or behaviour#+ I am already taking antipsychotics so
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
// ocs as patron saints. [x]
tagged by; @katsigian, @deadrlngers and @devilbrakers, thank you so much!!
tagging; @mojaves, @dickytwister, @ordinarymaine, @claudiawolf and YOU!
– PATRON SAINT OF RELICS.
patron saint of remembering. patron saint of holding something close. patron saint of holding on for too long. for a saint, a relic is often a part of the body, kept for some physical memento of their holiness. they are all in your hands, now: does it feel like remembrance? does it feel sanctified? are the dust and blood as precious as they're supposed to be?
hindsight carries the gun of his deceased father, the last memory he holds of the past and of what used to be his family; he is alone, a vessel for all that used to be, carrying the burden of remembrance like a chain around his neck. he has made himself easily digestible, to fit in, to not stand out; yet the past clings to him tighter than the present and forces him on his knees, forced to worship a twisted and faux idyllic retelling of a place he can no longer get back to.
– PATRON SAINT OF HEARTBREAK.
not of comfort. not of condolences. there is a heart and there is a fissure, a fracture, something that starts to splinter and break open. you're the patron saint of the way a heart is rent open. the way it tears itself apart. patron saint of the rift. patron saint of the gash. when they say to "open your heart" to somebody, you are the patron saint of bleeding out.
erytheia is a grave domain cleric, and has witnessed more burials in her lifetime than any being ever should. she has seen the countless ways in which the best of her abilities still did not suffice, her healing more than often merely prolonging a life rather than saving it; and she carries the consequences of it wherever she goes, the faces of those who were left behind, the broken hearts and wails of sorrow like a symphony in the dead of night, chasing after the trail of blood left by her bleeding heart.
– PATRON SAINT OF BLOOD.
patron saint of the life that flows through our bodies. patron saint of violence. patron saint of love. something that does not watch over but exists within: not for protection but for vitality. there is no passion without a beating heart at its core. when that heart breaks open, someone has to be responsible for what it bleeds.
juniper is full of life, full of passion. her heart hungers and beats viciously within her ribcage, threatening to burst out; all of which shows in her unexpected ferocity in battle, as well as in the way her hands hold the waist of her lover, whoever is within her reach when her desire threatens to spill over. a mouth that kisses as much as it bites, and teeth that graze vulnerable skin and dig into tender flesh; she is a predator, and gods save whoever becomes her next prey.
#tag games#ask:erytheia#ask:hindsight#ask:juniper#sorry for being insane with the commentary but i'm not normal about these guys okay#they're all part of my homebrew world btw :]#but yeah basically hindsight is being eaten alive by the past and every bad thing that happened to him that he can't even see#that the present is now also swalling him whole because of how far he's gone to mask all the things he believes make him stand out#and make him unloveable. he basically turned himself into that smooth spongebag freak and then wonders why he barely feels alive#meanwhile erytheia is so happy and cheery all the time and she deals relatively well with death and losing people#but she is absolutely HAUNTED by the people who were left behind. the loved ones of the people she couldn't save#being haunted by the living as a cleric is something that can be so (eats my fist#and then you have juniper who is overflowing with this energy that she needs to get out of herself somehow#and it translates into anger and lust and violence and desire and pain and love and the lines between all of them have blurred so much#to the point she doesn't even know what she's after anymore. she wants to have it all she hungers for more and more and more#but she can't just keep taking. and what happens when she's had enough? will she have ever had enough???#anyway as you can see i'm being normal about these people
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
read in 2025!
it's that time again! i've been doing reading threads here since 2022, and i always enjoy them. as always, you can find me on goodreads and the storygraph.
The Murder of Roger Ackroyd by Agatha Christie* (★★★★★)
Winter Hours: Prose, Prose Poems, and Poems by Mary Oliver (★★★★★)
The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Arden (★★★★☆)
Moon of the Crusted Snow by Waubgeshig Rice (★★★☆☆)
The Examiner by Janice Hallett (★★★★☆)
The Girl in the Tower by Katherine Arden (★★★★★)
A Vindication of the Rights of Woman by Mary Wollstonecraft
*An asterisk denotes a reread. **Two asterisks denote an ARC.
#reading thread#talking to strangers#four books in already!!! i have set a relatively low goal for myself (30 books) because my goals are less numerical and#more about expanding my horizons / reading genres i usually don't / reading books that have been on my tbr for a long time#i'm off to a strong start for the year but i also know i tend to start off really well and then slump hard a few times later on#so we will see how it goes! anyway my thoughts on my first 4 books#i always start my year off with a reread of an old favorite so i know i'm starting with a 5 star read <3 hence the roger ackroyd reread#now not to brag or anything but i figured out who the murderer was the very first time i read roger ackroyd...#still absolutely diabolical though. second greatest mystery novel of all time (orient express will always win first place)#winter hours was good! very thought provoking and really made me want to write which is always great#the bear and the nightingale!!! i really enjoyed it and yes i did cry. i got the sequel from the library yesterday hehe#moon of the crusted snow was alright! i liked it a lot more conceptually than i did in practice tbh#anyway <3333 happy reading in 2025 besties!!!!
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
somehow, I don't know how, but somehow sewing machines always know when you're nearly done with a project and pick that exact moment to throw a hissy fit
#sewing#sewing machines#I am so close to finishing this dumb swimsuit that I started in 2020 for a vacation that ended up not happening#and which I stuffed into a shoebox and into the back of my sewing stash when I realized I wouldn't get to wear it in 2020#then pulled it back out to finish for this family gathering coming up in a few days here#it's a one-piece suit and I hate one-piece swimsuits#and no one-piece has fit me off the rack since puberty so I'm stuck sewing it for myself#but I'm very happy with the design and relatively happy with the finished look#the idea is just to have something that is supportive and modest enough to wear around family#and in particular to wear to something like a waterpark with my nephews#something that won't ride up or fall down or come untied or anything like that#so it has a low-cut leg hole and a high-cut neck#and an entire invisible superstructure in the lining underneath to actually provide support and enclosure and all#it's plain black but it fits and supports and won't fly apart at the seams#but this very last step. oh this last step.#I had to drape the exterior bust area directly on me bc I can't account for curves and stretch and such if it's flat on the table#and then I had to wiggle out of it carefully with a ton of pins in the underarm and neckline area#I'm using a double-needle to top stitch the edges as a finish across the whole suit. it did one underarm and the neckline just fine!#but the turn from where the neckline meets the strap and down into the other underarm it just. won't do it.#it has thrown a fit and created a tangle of thread multiple times now. there are only 4" left to sew! just sew it!#it's not hard! we just did the exact same thing on the other side and it worked fine! but no! gotta throw a hissy fit!#ugh. anyway. I have removed all the thread and needles from the machine and turned it off and basically sent it to timeout lol#wrote this rant and gonna make myself some food and I'll fucking finish those last 4 inches later tonight or tomorrow#and then I have one tiny repair to something else I want to take on this trip. hopefully my sewing machine won't throw a fit over that too#istg the only projects this doesn't happen with are the ones that end with a bunch of handsewing#that's the way to trick my sewing machine I guess. but I'm not handsewing a swimsuit lol#at least I'm not so pressed for time that I can't just walk away from it for a bit. getting close to time to pack but not quite yet#my sewing#2024 mood#tagtalking
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Surprised no one did this ship yet
So I had my Uberhood for the very first time and honestly is so much fun thanks to all the new stuff that happens between Sims. So, for some reason my game has decided that Brandi and Vidcund had chimestry (Turn ons and off are random).
Bro, I can't describe how Vidcund just became the father that stepped up, in the Curious Household he rolled a want to go on a date with Brandi, ok they had their date, rolled to flirt, granted every wish I could and in one evening they were in love. Then when I went to Brandi's house she already rolled the want to get married to Vidcund, I was like "Girl, too fast" and it was like, Beau was still a toddler, Dustin literally got the already expected poor grades, tantrums, throwing up, surviving and selling stuff while doing the best they could.
Of course, as I play she eventually gives birth to her third child, and yes she rolled wants to invite Vidcund home thus they managed to build their relationship even more (And it was hella cute, Vid on his own tried to read to the boys or even if he and Dustin have no interest in sports they watched tv together lol), and after she settled down a bit, they got married.
She is still unemployed yet she makes some money by doing gardening and sewing, she also gets a few prizes now and then when she participates in cooking competitions, Dustin makes money not only by his part-time job in the criminal career but also by painting and sewing stuff, he managed to get an A+ and reached the Top of his Criminal career, has two Scholarships and seems he'll be ready to move to College eventually.
Beau and Theseus get some money by discovering stars or just stuff they do at school besides they have a lemonade stand. Vid had already a promotion back in Strangetown, then another one after moving with the Brokes, he does gardening as well and after rolling a want to go to the Mountains, they all are currently on Three Lakes enjoying their first family vacation
I'm stil trying to get him abducted for even more chaos in their household but it just didn't happen yet.
#Vidcund Curious#Brandi Broke#Dustin Broke#Beau Broke#The Sims 2#TS2#Uberhood#Sims 2 premades#Sims 2 Strangetown#Sims 2 Pleasantview#I'm not going to lie they do look cute together#I don't know why but Vidcund always does amazing when it comes to parenthood#He is a loser canon wise and still abducted or not he is amazing to Tycho and now with three boys that aren't even his#Brandi looks so happy man#She has time for herself now and does things she enjoys#Oh bro imagine when Vidcund's sisters and brothers come to visit#gosh its going to be chaos and the Broke house is so small for so many relatives lololololol#Curiously broke
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
#dragon age#as a nonbinary trans person this is fairly close to how i felt about it#in some ways inquisition did trans inclusion better just because it engaged with it in the context of the in-universe cultures#which is not to say it was without flaws either#at minimum they could've cast a transmasc VA for Krem for example#and veilguard does a great job there! there are at least four confirmed trans characters all played by appropriately gendered trans actors#but i've played through the entire game as a nonbinary rook#and now started another run as an aqun-athlok qunari who's socially transitioned but not physically#and when you use the mirror to mark your character as trans there's zero option to say your physical presentation hasn't changed#and you're happy with that#ultimately i feel like it's a symptom of the broader problem of the game in that everything is relatively shallow compared to earlier games#there wasn't enough time/care put into making stuff fit into the world and give it depth and meaning#i have friends who've found this plotline to be enlightening and empowering and i am so happy for them that it's opened the door#i do not think including the trans stuff was a mistake in any way whatsoever and i'm glad they did it#i just wish it'd had more time to cook#I ALSO wish we hadn't been stuck with a binary choice of encouraging Taash to be Rivaini or Qunari at exclusion of the other#both because they're nonbinary and because that's how being an immigrant or mixed race works#it's really weird to insist it has to be one identity or the other period
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Happy Pride!!
(I know it's like the end of June, this took longer than I wanted it to)
#Omg gay people!#ahhh I'm so happy with how these turned out!!#So obviously these are my headcanons for them#relatively consistent however they do change a little from time to time#Yeah this took wayyyyy longer than I wanted#but hey its done now#so yay#lego ninjago#cole ninjago#cole brookstone#zane julien#Enby Zane#nya smith#kai smith#pixal borg#skylor chen#copy pasteshipping#jay walker#Jay is trans#I mean just look at him#lloyd garmadon#acearo Lloyd#Gay#lesbian#wlw pride#bisexual#pansexuel#omnisexual#transgender#nonbinary
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm tired of trying to rummage through the dwindling search results just so I can maybe find something new to read — I've been in the fandom for years, I partially grew up with it, it's basically part of my identity, it carried me through some of my worst years as of now, and it's horrible to see it slowly die day by day. It's no one's fault — after all, I get why people would want to leave, and why they'd want to erase every trace of having loved these characters, the internet isn't forgiving once you've fucked up; there's no nuance and no mercy, so I get it.
But I'm not ready to leave yet. I don't think I'll ever be.
I want to keep growing alongside these characters, I want to live as they do and smile when they do — cry and laugh and feel whenever they do. Yet now I have to come to terms with the death of this fandom, the one that saved me (for as dramatic as it sounds) and the one that cradled me when I needed a hug. The one that made me feel a little less alone in what I loved, the one I wanted to explore until I died.
I have to come to terms with it's death, I have to come to terms with the fact that one day I won't have any new stories to read. I don't think I can do that without breaking.
The thing is: there's no other fandom that has grabbed me this hard — this fandom felt so versatile, so malleable; we could write about space the same way we could write about fantasy and superheroes and its canon. We could write about the olympics and dance academies and slam poetry, and no one would bat an eye; it feels harder to do all of this with other characters. I haven't found anything to fill the void this fandom is leaving, and I fear I never will — I know it's only been months, but I thought this would last forever! I thought I'd keep growing alongside it and I know this must sound stupid, some random person on the internet mourning an online community of all things, but it helped me: I felt held and accompanied whenever I opened a new book, I spent days imagining what my favorite characters would do in whatever story I was thinking of writing next, I started so many books that I'm not sure I'll ever finish writing, and somehow I don't mourn those the way I mourn the fandom as a whole. I felt seen in a way I never quite did in real life, because in the community there were other people who shared the same passion for the characters that I did, and I didn't have to explain it all to them so they could understand — they already did! They created and lived and grew up with it the same way I did, and for once I hadn't felt like the odd one out of the group, the one with the weird interests that no one cared about because they were inaccessible to others.
And now it's fucking dying. And now I gotta mourn it all
I feel aimless, like I'm just drifting through the motions — I never had much going on, still don't have a lot going on (hell, I probably have even less going on right now) and I know that doesn't help me in moving on. Maybe I need to start going to therapy again, maybe this is just the denial in the grieving process — but I'm tired. I finally had a taste of how it was like being within a big community that understood me and got what I liked and enjoyed the same things as I did, and I don't wanna go back to being isolated in my interests.
And to think this whole... I don't know man, thing spawned out of not finding many books I wanted to read. I feel dumb. I feel pathetic. I'm sad and angry and so heartbroken. The null sleep I got through the night is probably not helping. I should go to sleep I think
#don't mind me#i just hate humanity right now#i wanna claw at the walls and bleed and make it known that I'm sufgering i guess#but it feels stupid. i mean it's just a fandom. it ain't that big#except it WAS that big. it was my WHOLE. LIFE#I don't think i can properly move on#I don't WANNA move on#i miss 202 and 2021 and 2022 and 2023. when i was happy#or at LEAST i could PRETEND i was happy bc the fandom wasn't caving in around me and burying me alive#anyway#demon rambles™#I'll probably feel better after sleeping. or at least I'll be numb to it#i genuinely fear the day i finally run through the entire search results#reading is like. 99% of my entertainment. all i do is READING#the moment i run out of stuff to read is when the fandom is gonna be well and truly DEAD to me. and i fear that day and whenever it comes#i wish he hadn't passed away. i wished the other one hadn't turned out to be an absolute bastard#i wish the fandom could've survived both blows relatively fine. but i can't really say I'm surprised it couldn't#I won't. but i REALLY wanna claw at my arms. feel the pain SOMEWHERE where i can heal it easily i guess#how does one heal a wounded heart? how do i move on? CAN i move on? even when i don't wanna? when i GOTTA?#crying myself to sleep#i guess
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
TIL Hunter B-15 is actually Verity Willis...
I had hoped they wouldn't bring a whole BAFTA winner into the MCU in a small supporting role. And the fact that her character name was revealed actually could be a big spoiler for the direction of the STORYline...
#wunmi mosaku#verity willis#definitely will be some changes there#but I'm resting easier about her fate now#hunter b 15#loki#wunmi has job security#and so does gugu...especially if they change course given who is playing kang#just read up#I'm just happy gugu and wunmi are getting paid and have relatively secure mcu jobs
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
Been following you in your early piranhashipping days and just returned to tumblr to see that their tag have grown so much since I last scrolled through it, your dedication to them is admirable
THANK U FOR STICKING WITH ME!
#ask#text#as a proud father of the ship I couldn't just abandon them#If I didn't exist there would be no piranhashipping at all#it feels nice to have a few people slowly picking up on john kramer yaoi#the fandom is still relatively small compared to other saw rarepairs#since I'm pretty much the only one churning art of them 😭#the fics on the other hand... there's more writers now so that makes me very happy to see#thank s for the wholesome ask anon
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Repost from twitter
It's so true!! ;)
Happy birthday 🥳❤️
#it's my favourite person's birthday#my forever fave gregor 🥹❤️#and also happy birthday to lewis ofc who is one of my faves in f1 ;)#unfortunately it's a reoccurence that each year i'm busy on gregor's birthday 🥲#a proper birthday post will follow later#i was visiting relatives and now just finished a tennis training session#anyways#ski jumping family#ski jumping#gregor schlierenzauer#f1#lewis hamilton
9 notes
·
View notes