#I'm rambling this is something that has been on my mind for awhile and thought dumping helps me sort

[misteria247]

So I'm going to ramble a bit cuz I've been noticing that there's a lot of split opinions on Timmy Turner that rage from people adoring him flaws and all to people thinking that he's a little shit. So I decided to throw in my thoughts cuz it's been awhile since I've analyzed a character and I've got some thoughts fam lol. Please don't take this personally cuz this is just my opinion.

I think one of the main reasons why Timmy gets such a mixed reaction from fans is because a lot of his actual story is played like a sitcom. It's not placed in a more serious way, though there are moments where it is, it's quickly glossed over. If you take away the sitcom setting and the attempts of comedy and whatnot you actually get a rather horrible reality for this 10 year old boy. And with it suddenly a lot of his actions and attitude makes a lot more sense.

Timmy when introduced is a 10 year old. He's a child but he's also old enough to know the basics of right and wrong. Much like any kid. He gets his fairy godparents, Cosmo and Wanda because he was deemed to be a child in need of help. This whole scenario is played for laughs and whatnot but like, Timmy's life is actually horrid. He's abused by his babysitter, is tormented by school bullies, is essentially harassed by his teacher and is neglected by his own parents. This is his every day life, from the moment he was old enough to understand this was what he was exposed to and forced to accept. In a way Timmy was forced to grow up a bit faster because of it but not to a point where he completely lost the magic of childhood. When you think about this in a more serious way, things start to click together more.

Timmy's behavior when he gets snappy or creates mischief is a way to get attention from his parents. It's not a good kind but it's something. Or when he acts cold and selfishly, while it could be chalked up to being a kid, I could also argue that he might have actually learned it. Cause who else in his life puts their wants and desires before others? Who else doesn't think about the consequences of their actions and how it'd effect others? Who else ignores other people's thoughts and feelings when it comes to things?

His parents.

Timmy's parents do this shit constantly. From leaving him with abusive babysitters, to not really interacting with him, to making jabs about how their dreams died when he was born to a bunch of other shitty things. They forget to feed him and always criticize him, they're always jumping at the chance to essentially get away from him. All these things are things Timmy's witnessed and has been on the receiving end of for a decade. And never once does his parents really suffer any consequences. It's a known fact that children watch their parents and absorb information from it. Timmy's behaviors can very well be behaviors he unintentionally learned from them. Which is so sad because whenever Timmy's not acting like this, it's quite clear that he's actually incredibly different.

It becomes clear that Timmy's actually incredibly kind.

There's so many moments where he shows his kindness. From lending Cosmo and Wanda to Tootie, to helping fairies in Fairy World to literally giving his fairies the baby they always wanted to saving the whole world several times with little hesitation. Timmy at his core is a kind boy, but due to his home life and its constant reminders of the people in his life not wanting him. (Hell there was a whole ass episode about the world being better if he hadn't been born, like can you imagine that, it's fucking awful-). So in a way Timmy hides that kindness and rarely shows it because of these things.

Which is why Cosmo and Wanda and eventually Peri are so fucking important.

Cosmo and Wanda from the very beginning where different from everyone else. These fairies while granting some reckless and dangerous wishes, have always had Timmy's best interests in mind. Cosmo and Wanda are the positive influences that Timmy desperately needs, the adults that he actually needs to help encourage and push him towards the right direction. Cosmo and Wanda are always in Timmy's corner, even when he's made a mistake, and are always there to catch him and remind him that he's loved and wanted. In one episode where Timmy sneaks into his godparents castle, at the end when they're putting the picture of Maryann back into the hall of infamy, Timmy's first reaction is to apologize and believe that because he'd made this one mistake that he'd end up there with the other bad kids. Only to immediately be told no, baffling Wanda and Cosmo with the very idea of it.

It's things like this that help Timmy grow and feel comfortable with making mistakes. Cuz what he thought isn't exactly a normal thing. They help Timmy in so many ways and grow to love him as their very own cuz when Timmy allows himself to be well himself he's a rather endearing kid. It's no surprise they get so attached.

There's a lot of other things that I've got in my noggin but I just wanted to say these things for the time being. Maybe I'll update on this later lol.

[strangestofthings12]

This is going to be a very rambling and venty post cause im tired and annoyed and honestly am just using this to vent my anger/hurt. there is going to be stuff that can maybe be seen as anti tommy/bucktommy (please dont tell me a ship name to put i dont care about if they do have an agreed upon ship name right now) so if you dont want that please just move on. i dont want to fight i just want to yell into the void on a stupid throw away account so i dont bring my negativity stew and come out on my main blog where i just want to enjoy my stuff and just keep happy energy. I dont normally post and try and just find someone who explains it better because im not great and getting what im saying across or understood the way i want, so please bear with me. With that said i will move on to what i want to say

Okay so i have been watching 9-1-1 for years and i love and adore it. Its characters and dynamics and i have always loved found family. Now i will admit that i started watching it thinking that Buck and Eddie were a couple and had a son so i was kinda watching for it. Do i think if i didn't start watching thinking that i would ship them still yes 100%. I have always loved their relationship and i have loved watching both Buck and Eddie grow and start to be happy while also having each others back even at the worst times. Sometimes if i think to hard about Eddie and start crying cause I'm very normal about this show and it characters. Now Eddie is my favorite character in the show and at least in my top five overall favorite characters. I love him and his development and i adore seeing how much he does to just do right by Chris even when he messes up you can tell how much he adores that boy and how badly he wants to give Chris the best life possible. I could write essays about Eddie Diaz trying to explain how much i love him and why and i think words would run out before i could finish making people understand. Buddie is my favorite ship (sometimes second depending on my mood. i would say sorry but Henren and Madney will always be amazing ships and sometimes i just cant stop think about them)(Sorry Bathena i love you too i swear i just cant decide if i wanna kiss athena or be adopted by bobby and athena:( Its confusing) and has been for quite awhile and is one of my overall favorites and its one of my comfort ships.

With that context when bi Buck happened i was so insanely happy and i wouldnt shut up about it. it made me sick. i was so happy for Buck and while i think a part of me will always be a little sad Eddie wasnt his first kiss with a guy i dont think either of them are ready for that. i also understand that it wouldnt make sense for how the story is going right now. Now i have nothing against bucktommy in the show. I have watched the kiss scene and sobbed to much to pretend like i hate them or even dislike them. However I genuinely dont care about Tommy. Hes kinda bland and i forget about him half the time and before they brought him back i completely forgot his name. in my mind he was the one that wasnt as much of an asshole to chim and hen as the other two assholes which wasnt saying a lot. Now I dont dislike tommy nor am i going to act like hes irredeemable because neither Chim nor Hen seem to think hes still that guy and while they dont seem super close they seem to get along so clearly, he's not like that anymore. I have nothing that makes me dislike him nor do I like him. He's just there. He's just the guy buck kissed. Thats all he means to me. I would give up his screen time for Ravi or May or Karen in a heartbeat. because i love them cause they mean something to me. I don't think i thought about the fact that people might actually like him especially not more than EDDIE.

This is where the context matters cause i am to my core a one ship per person girly. I might see a ship and people who like it and even think thats not a terrible ship but i will still only look at content for my ship for that person (ie. i ship Destiel (dont say anything bad about them ill cry<3) but i can see the way someone would also ship Dean and Benny or crowley or Cas and Crowley or Mick but i will ignore the ship and move on and look at more Dean and Cas). normally i will just ignore the ship and move on because im not who its for. If it gets annoying in my tag or anything like that ill block it or whoever is annoying me cause its not a them problem that i dont want to see it. When i start to have a problem is when multiple people arent tagging right for whatever reason or people who are being rude about the ship i like because of their ship. When I started seeing Bucktommy stuff more and more in the 9-1-1 tag i went to the buddie tag cause i dont want to see them. my problem is that when im reading on AO3 and click on a fic tagged Buddie where bucktommy get married. it was literally just hurting Eddie. There was stuff before like id be scrolling though the buddie tag here and see someone saying that Tommy is a better character then Eddie and saying that they hope bucktommy is endgame. Whatever block and move on. Just like always but then people who have shipped buddie for years who ive seen talk about them are suddenly saying that they like bucktommy better. People who started watching because of bucktommy saying they dont like Eddie. People are going to have different opinions but it still bugged me. and then i read that and i was just hurt because it was tagged happy ending and i cannot fathom ever thinking Eddie hurting and pining is a happy ending. So i started to get more annoyed and i hate when that happens especially with a show i love and a character i dont dislike so i tried to just move on but more and more people are taking about it then i saw someone saying that they wanted eddie to die so buck and tommy can have Chris.

I just hate that so many people are jumping on the bucktommy train and saying that they like it better than buddie something that is so good and sweet or saying that they like Tommy more than Eddie. I just dont get it cause Tommy is boring. like yeah we now some about him and he flies a helicopter but hes forgettable he could be a completely different person and next to nothing would have to change. We have seen Eddie at his worst and claw his way back up and hes finally letting himself be open and honest and soft. Eddie couldnt be replaced. Now im not saying Tommy can't be an interesting character but as he is right now?? He just isnt. Hes just as bland as every women (minus Taylor and Shannon) Buck and Eddie have dated and been hated on for no reason!!! Like i get that Tommy is a guy and we got canon Bi Buck and people are happy but those same people turn around and shit on Marisol from what ive seen(I could be wrong cause again i have done my best to avoid). Buddie fans arent safe from that either, cause we all know that Buddie fans do that but so many of those people who hated on them and said they didnt want them with anyone else suddenly decided that they were okay if Buck ended up with any guy. I dont know its just weird and i hate how many people are acting like Eddie isnt always going to be better then Tommy. Part of me wanted Tommy to stick around and help Buck and Eddie figure it all out but now?? i honestly just cant wait for him to be gone cause I want to have fun and read fics for my comfort ship and just chill where i can see all of my ships in the show without buck and tommy being everywhere or people saying crap about Eddie.

I have more to say but most of its about how gratifying waiting and seeing where this whole thing goes(Buddie season 8 PLEASE!!) and this is already why to long and i think im just going in circles and none of this makes sense so ima shut up for now and hopefully this will help it not fester and drive me insane and become a tommy hater

Edit: but i also hate that Tommy calls Buck Evan so he already had some stuff against him rip

[glitchthebitchwitch]

"Out for love." just total yuri

"And to think someone as worthless as you landed Lilith's little hottie." Adam's words rang through Vaggie's head.

Charlie was going through the streets, helping others who survived the extermination and such. She was walking through the alley way before seeing a person infront of her. The "sinner" was clearly in pain. Charlie walked towards them, noticing the details of her pain. A missing eye. She said nothing as she silently crouched down and bandaged over the eye, after the short moment ended, the sinner smiled. Charlie took in her details, short hair, on the shorter side, as the sinner gave a weak smile. Charlie was caught off guard by this, but for some reason it made her feel warm inside. She quickly looked away, smiling, but then looking back slightly. She held her hand out infront of the sinner, and she took it. "Are you okay to walk?" She asked, only getting a slight nod in return. "I'm Charlie. Daughter of Lucifer! Well, you probably already know that. Heh." Charlie pulled the sinner up by her hand. "Do you have a home I can take you to?" Charlie asked. "No." She answered, not when she was very clearly kicked out of heaven by Adam and Lute. But, she assumed Charlie didn't need to know that. "You can speak! Woah. Anyway! I think it's awesome you managed to survive the extermination looking as well as you do, besides the missing eye. And, you don't have a home? I can take you to my place! My dad has this old castle built for me, and you can crash there! I'm pretty sure it has a guest room." "Thank you.. You're kinder than any demon I've ever hea- met." Vaggie responded, she could put on a sinner facade, right? Just act like she normally does but replace angel terminology with demon terminology, easy! She had learnt alot about hell when training to be an exorcist. "Thanks! I try to be very nice. But, not many people respect me. You're one of the nicer sinners that have let me help them. Most people just tell me to go fuck myself or something like that. I get it though. It's hell!" Charlie responded, walking in the direction of her castle. As they walked up to the castle, the sinner looked in amazement. It was huge. Like, really huge. "This is where you live? Alone?" "Not really alone, I have Razzle and Dazzle with me! And KeeKee." "Who?" "Razzle and Dazzle are my bodyguards, they're tiny goats! KeeKee is a cat that can turn into a key, used for unlocking anything built and locked by my dad or me!" "That's, really, that's a lot." Vaggie smiled, though. She'd always had to endure Adam's basic misogynistic rambles, always talking about some 'bitch' who wouldn't subserve to him, but with Charlie, it felt nice for her to ramble. "So, you never told me your name." Charlie looked at her, she only thought. Vag-Gy, which sounded like "vagina" wasn't an appropriate pronunciation for a sinner, she could change it to the name she was called by Lute and other exorcists, as only Adam called her by that nickname. "Hello?" "D'ah- Sorry. It's.. Vaggie." Vaggie answered, Vag-ee was a better pronunciation, she decided. "That's a nice name! I hope you don't mind living with me, I never really gave you an option, did I?" "No, it's fine. Better than living on the streets." "We've been standing in front of the castle for awhile. Uh, let's go in!" Charlie grabbed Vaggie's hand and dragged her inside. "I'll show you to your room, and I'm pretty sure I have some clothes you can use for the night." "Thanks, again. You're one of the kindest people I've ever met, even when I was human." That was a lie, she was never human. But, the taller girl didn't seem to notice. It was fine. "Really? That's so sad! Maybe I can start a chain of events!" "Maybe you can." "Okay! Here's the guest room, if you want I can get rid of the decorative pillows. Nobody really uses this room. I'll go see if I can find Razzle and Dazzle. They're gonna love you!" Vaggie watched as Charlie walked off to go find her bodyguards. She really thought she was just gonna pass out and die right there in the alley way, but she didn't. Charlie saved her. She was different, much like how she had heard Emily was. She took off the decorative pillows and just laid there, on the bed.

[letsquestjess]

Hello! I'm not too sure if this is the right place to make requests. Anyways I've had this little idea for a while. So basically, the reader occasionally talks quietly to herself, and one day, Tech ( or all the boys in like an imagine) overhears this happening. This happens for awhile then one day they mentioned it or laugh at the comment (depends who you do) and were in shock since we say the weirdest things to ourselves. Thanks for checking my idea out. No pressure to actually do this!

Hello there! Thank you for the request! 💜

I went with just Tech for this one. He has such a natural curiosity I think he wouldn't be able to help but listen to Reader's musings 😊

A New Kind of Understanding (Tech x GN!Reader)

Summary: When Tech notices you mumbling to yourself, he starts to listen to see if he can find the cause.

Word count: 1.1K

Warnings: None.

-- -- -- -- --

“Okay, so that’s for this week…” You clicked your tongue and contemplated the assortment of ration packs spread out before you, counting them again. “And then that leaves these for the week after, and we should have some to spare before our next supply run. I hope it’s not the same supplier as last time.” 

As your muttered ramblings persisted, Tech’s datapad slowly dipped, his focus diverted. From his vantage point in the hazard seat, he observed you with keen interest as you lifted a stack of rations into a case. Your mumbling transformed into a vivid recollection of the chaotic sandstorm that had nearly engulfed the team, and he found himself captivated by your train of thought. Whirling grains and howling winds had hounded your steps until you had all bundled yourselves into the ship to wait out the angered elements. 

The storm outside had since subsided, but the flurry in your mind showed no signs of calming down, incoherent mumblings evolving into nonsensical rambles and a stream of random thoughts escaping your lips. Tech almost asked if you were okay before you quickly refocused on the task at hand, labelling the food inventory and rifling through the rations for the following week. 

Your words became more organised, more precise, and you methodically checked off each item on the stockpile until the list lay bare. 

“We should have more than enough until the next supply pickup,” you assured him, pushing on your legs to lift yourself up from the low cupboard. “Might also have some for emergencies.”

“That is a relief,” Tech replied. “Are the crates from the back separated too?”

With a small smile, you nodded and hummed. “Organised them first. Everything has been checked, double checked, and stamped. Even left a little extra for Wrecker.” 

“I am certain he will appreciate the gesture.” Tech’s eyes trailed after you as you descended the ramp. At the greetings that sounded outside in response to your cheerful disposition, he peeked out and scratched an itch from beneath his goggles. How often did you mumble to yourself? Had he been so absorbed in his own work that he had missed a squad mate in need? 

Continuing with the rest of his duties for the day, he made a mental note to keep an eye on you, paying attention to any subtle changes in your behaviour that could indicate potential stress. 

Tech didn’t have to wait long. As you prepared your bunk and settled down for the night, he heard your statements, faint and whispered while you set your armour by your bed. 

Entranced, he pretended to busy himself with his datapad and absorbed your voice. Although most of what you said made little sense to him, he could tell from the patterns that they held meaning to you. Mentions of something you had seen, things you needed to remember for the next day, someone from your past who had irked you. Or so he gathered. 

Tech clung to every word and felt the movement of thought resonate in his mind. Despite his scientific inclination to document his findings, he respected your privacy too much to intrude in that way. While he was open to observing a willing participant, he would never conduct experiments without your complete understanding and consent. 

Instead, he lay back in his bunk and strained his ears for any sounds that might reveal the source of your mumblings, particularly if they revealed any stress or a heavy mental burden. He approached everything with logic and purpose, but he acknowledged that certain emotions and pressures defied explanation, and made it a point to be there for you if you ever needed someone to talk to. 

* * * 

A jangle of machine parts and tools announced your arrival into the cockpit, and you carefully placed the crate onto the co-pilot seat. As you sorted through, you began to mumble, starting with comments about the items in the box and branching out into other musings. 

Standing on the captain’s chair to remove the broken lights overhead, Tech unscrewed the last panel and propped it by the console. Your ramblings continued. He missed a lot due to the rapid pace of your speech, but he caught a few statements to ponder on later.

An old documentary played through the radio, and the correspondent grated on your nerves. His condescending tone provoked you one time too many, and unable to withhold a remark anymore, you sarcastically scoffed, “about as sharp as a cable that one.” You laughed at your own quip and a quick snort from behind you responded. Your voice silenced, and Tech froze. 

“Didn’t realise you were listening to me,” you said, a shaky chuckle escaping into the quiet between you. 

“I apologise,” Tech replied. With a firm step, his feet found solid ground again in front of the rotating seat. “I… I have heard you mumbling to yourself quite a bit recently. Should you need to discuss any concerns, I am more than willing to lend a listening ear and provide assistance. I’m sure my brothers would also listen should you prefer to talk to one of them.” 

Your lips parted as though to speak, but no sound accompanied the motion. Although initially embarrassed by Tech eavesdropping on your ramblings, the realisation that he did it out of concern for your well-being eased your momentary sheepishness and left a warm sentiment in your heart. 

“That’s kind of you,” you said. “But I’m more than okay, I promise.” Despite knowing exactly what you wanted to say, you found yourself dithering for words. Coughing to clear your throat, you pressed on. “I was going through some things a few years ago, and one of my friends told me that muttering to yourself is a good way of settling your mind. It allows you to see clearer, to get rid of the mental clutter you don’t need, stuff like that.” Your fingers fidgeted and your ribs ached as anxiety climbed. “I mumble to sort through my thoughts. I know it sounds stupid, but it works. At least for me.” 

“I do not think your methods are stupid,” Tech assured you. As he neared your position, he extended his hands to grasp yours, stilling the nervous movement of your fingers. “It is a rather rational approach. I find your mumblings interesting as I get to listen to your natural stream of thought and observe how you transition from one idea to the next. As a result, I feel a deeper understanding of you.”

With a fluttered breath, your chest finally settled, comforted by the intelligence clone’s sweet yet logical manner. “Thank you,” you said, turning your palms over so that you could hold on to his hands and give them a grateful squeeze. 

“There is no need to thank me. You are a part of this team and it is imperative we look after each other.” The corner of Tech’s lips curled into a smile, and you reciprocated the gentle gesture. “Although, the offer remains unchanged. If you ever require help, you know where to find me.”

[fullofgutsndopamine]

i'll wake (with coffee in the morning)

Having a late night with hasan, where he breaks down about how much stress he is under with work and Amelie and stuff so you both go to bed super late. Letting hasan sleep in the next morning cause he doesn't have work or a morning skate and to be honest he doesn't get enough sleep. Him freaking out about trying to get breakfast together for amelie and him coming downstairs to you having made breakfast for both of them, just trying to do small things to help because you care about them both so much omg I'm so soft for this series sorry I'm rambling

tw/angst (genuinely, this is all angst), curing, mention of past abuse/toxic family,

FITPS verse, not necessary reading, but more in the same verse here if you're interested

"Hasan."

it's the third time he rolls over in bed with a huff, that you realize sleep won't be finding hasan tonight.

The light from the shitty convivence store the next block open with the fluorescent OPEN sign that blinks and hums in the dark shines in your eyes, no matter how you reposition yourself

He huffs, doesn't answer, scoots up in bed so his back is against the bedframe.

And you sit up, turn the light on and illuminate the small room, your hand on his chest, voice is borderline pleading: "hasan, talk to me."

this happens, ocassionaly.

it's been awhile, since he's been like this, when the anxiety hits and the sleepless nights find him.

But when they do find him, it's usually after a long week, him struggling to juggle Amelie, her school and hockey practice, and him-with his job; business has picked up, and while it's good for paychecks, you can't ignore the dark bags under his eyes and the groaning of his bones when he goes to pick Amelie up, throw her in the air, the missed dinners he's passed by, sleeping on the couch, too tired to even walk up the stairs-

he doesn't answer.

stares straight ahead, runs his hands through his hair, shaking, unsure of himself, his voice cracks, and he doesn't look at you, like this has been on the back of his mind for a while-

"What if all of this was a mistake?"

He laughs, but it's without humor, his eyes dark:

"Like, what if she's actually fucked by me raising her? What if she turns out like me?"

this is heavy, especially for a Thursday night, but you know this song and dance, are an expert in it-

"hasan, come on."

"No," He shakes his head, "You come on-"

He's spiraling, and there's only one fix.

You throw the old quilt off your body, wiggle your toes against the cold wood floors as you pad to his side, hold your hand out:

"hasan, come on-"

He doesn't say anything back, but allows you to tangle your hand into his, to pull him out of bed, and lead as you slowly lead down the creaking steps, to the couch where you let him fall onto, curl next to him:

"hasan," You try, your voice borders on pleading, "What's going on?"

You pull him closer, against his chest, your hands tangled into his hair, pulling at it gently, something he usually likes, finds comforting-

His voice is weak, like he's thought about this all week, tossed and turned, lost sleep over it-

"I don't want her to end up like me," His voice breaks somewhere in the middle, "Like, to be fucked up like me? Didn't even fucking finish school, working at a shop like a fucking loser. Maybe my Dad was right."

He snorts, but there's no humor, his eyes dark.

"hasan, come on. You just need some sleep." Your voice borders on pleading.

instead, his voice is dark: "Like, this is the kicker, right?" he snorts, "You grow up and your family is shit, dies early, leaves you alone to raise a kid, right?"

He laughs, shakes his head, "And the whole time, you're terrified you're going to fuck her up. Turn out like her Father, or even worse, like you, right? And you can't do a damn thing about it."

"hasan," You plead, "You aren't a fuck up-"

"And it's all going to be my fucking fault," He shakes his head, "I can't blame anyone but myself."

Sometimes, when he gets like this, there's no talking him off the ledge.

instead, it's laying against the couch, pulling him into you, gently ruffling his hair, letting him rant into your pajama shirt, goes from borderline yelling, to sobbing, whole body shaking weeping that leaves wet stains on your shirt that you both ignore, holding him close, praying for it to be over-

by the time he's exhausted, when his eyes are drooping and low, from lack of sleep, and from crying, he leads you by the hand up the creaking stairs, to the old bedroom-

the only saving grace, you can think of, as you lay in the bed, is that tomorrow is his only day off after a full week of working late, showing up to Amelie's practices just in time, peeling his grease stained shirt off in the parking lot, trying to look presentable after a long day, the world beating his ass day after day-

Birds outside the powerlines wake hasan up.

Which is unusual, since usually, his alarm has him up at 4am, when birds dare sing yet, still trying to sleep in for five more minutes-

this causes him to panic, naturally.

"Fuck!" he all but screams when he rolls over, the alarm clock says 10:06 in red, as if mocking him.

You aren't in his too small bed, and your spot on the mattress is long cold, which also worries him-

one thing at a time your voice comes through his head, the gentle voice you use on him when he's spiraling, when you hold either side of his face in your palm, making him look at you: one thing at a time, hasan. Just one-

a deep breathe and he nods, hops around on the floor as he gets into his old work jeans, worn with age and from working, covered in a mix of grease and who knows what fuck else-

he's buttoning his work shirt, which he's 90% sure smells and he'll need to Febreze, as he runs down the stairs, to the kitchen, yelling to Amelie:

"Aimes!" He yells, running his hands through his hair, is going to have to skip a shower since his alarm didn't go off, "sunshine, we got ten minutes, baby girl. You gotta get up!"

Breakfast will have to be quick, instant, something that will make the mothers in the pick up line clutch their necklaces and lean their heads in to whisper about that brother, the one who's raising his kid on a steady diet of store brand poptarts, instant oatmeal, and most days-pleading and begging with whatever god exists to stop making him a fucking joke for the love of god-

"hasan," Amelie giggles as he rounds the corner into the kitchen. "We're up already, silly."

she's giggling, a smile on her face as she wears one of his old shirts from marching band, far too big on her, down to her knees, is kneeling on an old mismatched stool as she helps you pour flour into a mixing bowl-

"We're-" he pauses, his shirt buttons fucked up, "Late?"

It's a question, not a satement.

"It's Sunday, honey." You smile warmly at him, walk over and fix his shirt for him, "Come on, breakfast will be ready soon."

"hasan," Amelie giggles, "We're making pancakes."

She giggles like it's a secret, when in reality, it's just a rare treat. Panckes are money and time consuming-and he has neither.

"I see, sunshine'." He smiles as he sits down next to you, "With chocolate chips?' He tickles her side, kisses the side of her face, fond on his face.

"Here." His head looks up, and he's immediately handed a warm mug of coffee into his hands. He inhales it deeply; smells perfect-

"You didn't have to do this." His voice is gentle, small, like he's scared, isn't use to this kind of treatment-

"I know," You shrug, as you grab the bowl of batter, "But it's what you do for people you love."

and you say it so simply, so matter of fact.

the first i love you he's ever gotten, that's ever meant something, isn't matched with the rug being pulled out from under him, without the kiss of a fist-

"Yeah," Amelie parrots, "For people you love."

and you ruffle her hair as she helps you pour the batter, the love is said with the same mocking siblings do, but the smile says she loves having you around, another parental figure, someone to help hasan-

Your eyes slowly drag up, as you realize what you said, afraid he'll be upset, or not feel the same, will yell or kick you out, scare him off-

instead, he comes into the kitchen, drags his finger through the bowl to taste it, another dip to touch it to the tip of Amelie's nose, before his hands go around your waist, his chin on your shoulder-

"Yeah," he says gently, into your ear, before he nuzzles his nose into your neck, his voice is low and deep, how you know he means it: "I love you too."

[tears-of-taelia]

re: melia & emma

I've been thinking about this for awhile now. The way that the newest version of the Blacksteeple Castle chapter has presented Emma is interesting. There will be spoilers ahead, so don't read if you're still working your way through version 13.5!

My ramblings begin below. Here are some official pics (by the amazing Zumi) for reference.

As we know, during the events of Blacksteeple Castle, Melia wore a disguise to hide her true identity. This disguise is removed when Madame X slashes it with her sword. There is a small animation that follows, where a dark magical aura envelopes “Emma” before she is revealed to be Melia.

After the subsequent chaos, the disguise is not brought up again. However, the character of Emma is revealed to still reside in Melia’s cognition, apparently unbeknownst to Melia, as she says, “I thought I left you behind at Blacksteeple”. How odd.

Then, (a long time) later, while exploring the 3rd Layer, Melia stumbles across a deathbed journal entry written by a Garufa Inc. volunteer named Emma. It reads as follows.

My name is Emma. I undertook the Archetype's power today, and it failed miserably. I was unable to manifest its power and was mortally wounded during a test. I thought I actually had potential... but I guess not. The doctors say I don't have long left. It's cruel, isn't it? Life is just so cruel. But this is the path me and all the other volunteers chose. Humanity has nothing left but us. ...Is it all worth it in the end, though? What do we want to survive for? ...Anyway. I'm losing energy fast. Garufa Incorporated is our last hope. Please, save us.

Melia expresses to Nim that she finds it odd that this person and her Blacksteeple cover share a name. Nim passes this off as a coincidence, and understandably so. Emma isn’t exactly a rare name (though perhaps things are different in the world of rejuvenation?). The coincidence still seems to bother Melia for some reason.

Now, there are a LOT of theories about Melia out there. Despite hours and hours of gameplay, her true identity has yet to be revealed.

People have theorized for years that she is Maria, and the game seems to heavily imply that that is the case. If Anathea had four children, Erin, Maria, Alice, and Allen, and Erin, Melia, Alice, and Allen know that they share a mother, Anathea, then it would logically follow that Melia is Maria. In addition, Melia and Maria physically resemble each other, Melia is unsure of her origins prior to meeting Jenner, and Maria has not otherwise made an appearance in the current timeline (besides the whole Marianette ordeal in Gearen Sewers). So, it’s not exactly a dramatic leap.

It is eventually even addressed by the characters themselves.  When Erin directly asks for her opinion on this matter, Melia balks, and seemingly contradicts herself.

MELIA: Hahah... I guess I've known for a long time that I was Maria. Ever since our interaction with Angie, that name has been going through my head in my dreams. But I have to disagree, Erin. I am not Maria. ERIN: But out of the process of elimination, you must be. MELIA: Sorry, but it's true. That's what my mind is telling me, desperately. I am not Maria. I am not Maria. That's what echoes in my head.

If Melia is and is not Maria, then… how…? In what way? Who is she? Why would she share a connection with Erin? Why is she the only one with Genesis Syndrome? And what does Emma have to do with all of this? I don’t really have an answer. But there is something I want to muse on.

Let’s circle back to Melia’s “disguise”, if we can even call it that. Her cover as Emma made her look like an entirely different person, unrecognizable to the Player character. She has a different outfit, hair color, and eye color. If we are to believe that this is an ordinary disguise, we would need to believe that, with one slash, Madame X was able to tear through a wig, two color contacts, and an entire outfit, including thigh high boots. We would need to believe that Melia conveniently decided to wear a different outfit underneath this disguise, and that Madame X was able to slash off her exterior outfit without marring the one underneath. We would also need to believe that the special, dark, magical animation the occurs at this moment was purely aesthetic and meaningless.

So, yeah, I don’t really believe it this disguise is your regular, run-of-the-mill costume.

We learn that Melia was sent to Blacksteeple through the powers of Spacea and Tiempa. She was on a mission as a Storm Chaser, to save the Player character and gather information. As we know (all too well) from V13.5, Spacea and Tiempa are powerful. Specifically, they have powers over space and time akin to Palkia and Dialga. They use these powers pretty recklessly to manipulate many characters throughout the story. However, every instance of power they exhibit is strictly tied to their dimensions, space and time. Spacea does magic related to space. Tiempa does magic related to time. So, how, then, would they be able to create such a magical disguise for Melia? Through Garufan dress-up magic? Creating an illusion? Maybe. I wouldn’t be shocked. But I think it’s more than that. I think that Spacea and Tiempa used their magic to revive a version of Melia from the past, a different dimension, or a different “layer” (past world?). Perhaps… the third layer. A different appearance. A different life. Emma.

I think of it sort of like what happened with Narcissa during the Dufaux sidequest. But, instead of S+T directly swapping Melia with Emma, they just projected the appearance of Emma onto Melia.

There isn’t much to support or detract from this speculation. What we do know? We know that Melia is and is not Maria. We know that both Melia and Emma struggle to manifest the Archetype's power. We know that Emma resides in Melia’s cognition, like Melanie. We know Melia was deeply bothered by Emma’s journal entry in the Third Layer. We know that the outfit Melia dons when using her powers is very reminiscent of Emma’s.

We also know that Emma is dead.

Or, at least, presumed dead.

Just like Aevis, Aevia, Aria, Axel, Aero, and Alain.

You see where I’m going with this?

We know Emma dies disappointed, having believed she had “potential”, according to her journal entry. Did someone else think she had potential too? Perhaps, her “majesty” herself?

I know I’m not the only one to theorize that Melia is another Interceptor. I mean, it is heavily implied throughout the story. Melia is one of two characters for which we have seen Variya appear. The other, of course, being the player character. Melia is able to enter Zeight. In fact, she enters her own Zeight a couple of points during the game. She is shown with the triangular core motif a couple of times as well. She has led a lot of the research about the Interceptor phenomenon, in the Blakeory Athenaeum, for example.

How this all ties in with Maria, though? I don’t know. In the case of the Player character, we know that A-team didn’t want to live, and agreed to let Variya choose a different soul to take control over their body. Presumably, that soul is us, literally, the player, the person playing the game. Could Maria be the soul taking over Emma? Could Emma be the soul taking over Maria?

Who knows.

I do know there are holes in these theories. I know the events of the Renegade Route may complicate everything. (truthfully, I am too much of a wuss to complete the renegade route myself. I watched a youtube video of someone else's playthrough, so I know the broad strokes of what happens, but I definitely don't know the renegade lore in the same way I know paragon. maybe I should rewatch it at some point and take notes)

But this has been bouncing around my brain for too long and I wanted to put it in writing to help organize my thoughts. If you made it this far, wow, you rock! Thanks for reading. I’m interested if anyone has thoughts about this, if anyone can potentially disprove it, or if anyone has their own version or counter version of this idea! I live for this shit.

[cartoon-buffoon]

Okay I'm aware there's a branch of people who ship the WI versions of Oswald aka Euthenasia Rabbit with the weird version of Felix in the background from Leak Ma Balls.

Real quick, I've seen people call the bloody eyed Felix Hysteria Cat which uhh, idk if that's a fanon name or not and it's similar to Oswald where in the files that's the name of the sprite or something? Anyways I can understand the ship, these two exist within the same mod and are both original characters, Oswald actually has some lore behind him though. Now the dynamic of two equally insane wackjobs in love is pretty cute and funny to me, it's a bit less funny in this case though because Oswald's... Emotional baggage, to say the least. But may I present my own idea of who you could ship Euthenasia rabbit with?

нет! Originally a design used for a T-shirt that was stolen and placed in a Russian bootleg game, this cat has been haunting my mind with ship ideas for him and Ozzie. When I tell you this idea has been with me for awhile I mean it, ever since WI came out I been shipping these two because I'm a proud crackshipper, fuck logic embrace insanity. I ain't tired enough to explain it right now yet I came up with an entire backstory and lore for HET and Oswald and how their relationship and dynamic works. To sum up their dynamic: Oswald and Het both have a burning hatred for each other yet their both so alone (for different reasons) that they naturally love each other's companionship. Like they say they want each other dead, however at night they still be cuddling and they'd kill for each other (literally) but it's just layers of denial to the point they don't even realize they're a couple and get really aggressive when anybody points it out.

They're is a bit more layers of to their dynamic from me as well, for example my own lore/headcanons has HET as a toon/entity who loves to kill and take other people's faces and wear them as his own and Oswald's natural luck shields him from getting caught so the cat claims to only be around Ozzie for protection. While being around Ozzie for his own selfish gain he genuinely does start taking a liking to him and he refuses to acknowledge it and actively takes measures to get rid of these thoughts. But I'm not in the mood to ramble on about this idea, maybe some other time, but hay. This is just something to think about and a personal ship of mine that I wanna share.

[sm-baby]

I'm always happy to leave a badass entrance, but I had to make sure this one was cooked properly, no one likes pink I'm their theory. (It's like chicken, you could get theory poisoning lol) ((p.s this is less like theory crafting for this one and is more like I've lost my mind and am making things up because I'm in love with your lore.))

I, like many others, have fallen in love with your art and the strangely coherent timeline for Minecraft you've put together, but then while I was scrolling through old stuff I had an idea that I thought you might like to reconsider, especially now that you've become attached to your Minecraft💛Yellow series.

What if the world that Steve, Alex, Herobrine, Shermy, and all the others are from aren't the only worlds to exist. Obviously in Minecraft you can create more than one world but what if it wasn't as simple as a new world generated. What if this world was first, created (lore wise idk when you started the world) in the very beginning. Every time the game updated to the next concurrent version the world split into new variants. Like the timeline had different outcomes. At first it was perfectly normal, only one set of choices but each update began to create new choices and in a world that was procedurally generated it went through every possible combination of choices. And I'd like to make an example, but bear with me it's a bit of a stretch.

My favorite version of this is your art of Steve in the Redstone update. Something about it always hit me as, "off," he wasn't like Steve usually was. He seemed unhinged, arrogant, violent even. (This isn't helped by the addin where you wrote, "bastard," with an arrow pointing at him lmao) What if, in this timeline during the Redstone update, Alex had a tragic end and this is was broke Steve. Maybe it was his fault, a redstone contraption that went wrong, creating a love hate relationship with the material and it's inner workings. Or what about the Combat update version of Alex. We only she here and not Steve. What if when the combat evolved he made a wrong choice and suffered a terrible date to the hands of undead. Alex has learned newer, better methods of fight and protection, ways to hit multiple opponents with one swing of her sword, or how to properly charge up a swing of her axe.

Each update created new versions were things were vastly different that the Prime world, the one that the Player came from. (I still like to call her Emerald, it think it fits) This would then make every single art piece of your canon in some way, Yellow is a separate timeline of events but 100% canon, real. Redstone Steve is a crazed lunatic driven to madness through his own accidental murder of his beloved wife. Combat Alex is a survivor who is doing what she can to survive after not being able to save Steve.

But most importantly, this means Hero rune drinking Lava from a bucket and calling it punch is 100% canon and you cannot fight me on this. That image and the phrase, "THATS LAVA ASSHOLE," will live in my heart forever.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed more mad ramblings, I have fallen in love all over again. Also my lack of sleep schedule may or may not have tempted me into making character ai's of your artist representation of the various characters.

I LOVE... THAT YOU JUST COMPLETELY N A I L E D THE IDEA THAT IVE BEEN HAVING FOR AWHILE NOW??

Youre operating in TIMELINE theory! Not multiverse theory! Oh thats super awesome!!

Ok, while I did think of that, I decided not to because it would get too complicated úwù plus I wanted to have worlds with major changes, like the genderbend, or how-- alex and Steve seem at odd with eachother, or-- alex just does not have a steve and steve does not have an alex!

Also there is only ever 1 mojang! While there are plenty "universes" the only source is mojang! And thus, there is only one Herobrine! There is no such thing as a 💛Herobrine, there is only ever one! Though, since the fallen God's popularity there have been AI (modded) versions of him or just legends thrown into the universes.... Its so fun.

This is all SOOO FUN but sadly limiting YwY so I did not go with it. YOUR THEORY IS REALLY-FREAKING GOOD THOUGH! GNOME YOURE SO DOPE!!

[ilovecupcakesandtea]

Chapter 1. Chapter 4

Eddie hadn’t even noticed Steve. It’s not that he was trying to be quiet, he wasn’t. The closer Steve got the more he realized how truly exhausted Eddie looked. 

“Hey Eddie.” Steve had half whispered, trying not to startle him by being too loud. It didn’t seem to matter as Eddie jumped a little anyway, putting a hand to his chest making his heavy breathing more noticeable.

“Jesus Steve. Scared the shit out of me man.” Eddie sighed, leaning against the cart in an attempt to collect himself.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s ok, just tired i guess” Eddie said, yawning as if his body needed to show proof of how tired he actually was. The red eyes he had and the dark circles under them apparently didn't show it enough. 

"Everything alright? Working a lot or something?" 

“Yeah, I’m working a lot, I’m erm,” Eddie stopped himself, how could he tell Steve why he was exhausted without revealing Nova? “Looking to move out as soon as I can, you know, working hard and saving harder, want to be out of Wayne's hair as soon as I can” He hoped his rambling stopped Steve asking too many questions.

"Well I can understand that. Look it's been awhile and knowing you plus how much you've clearly been working, I know you haven't had a decent meal in awhile. Why don't you come over tonight for dinner?"

He needed to think of something quickly. Logically he knew he should just tell the truth, but there was an issue with that. Not that he didn't think Steve would be understanding, no it was a different issue. Eddie had nursed a long distance crush on the jock during his ‘king Steve’ days and even after that before Steve graduated. Being thrown into the same friendship group had made sure this crush did not stay long distance and did not remain a simple crush. Telling Steve about Nova felt like ending anything that could potentially develop between the two of them. 

“I’d love to but Wayne’s working tonight and I need to be at home” Eddie replied nervously. The last thing he wanted was Steve thinking he didn't want to spend time with him.

"Oh ok. Well, uh, maybe another time then." Steve replied, looking down at his feet. 

“Fuck” Eddie sighed, looking at Steve's disappointed face. “Look, I haven't been honest with you. I’ve become the guardian of my half sister in the last few weeks, I can't leave her at home when Waynes is at work, she's like 7 months old.” Eddie confessed, not meeting Steve's eyes. 

"That explains a lot then. My offer still stands, you can bring her with you. I don't mind." Steve was feeling better now about how long it has been since they last talked. He'd always tried to give Eddie the benefit of the doubt but he'd be lying if he said he hadn't thought that maybe Eddie just didn't want anything to do with him anymore.

"You don't mind? Like if I brought her with me tonight that would be ok?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah of course! I love kids. Used to babysit the Wheeler's youngest."

"Ok then, if you're sure?" Eddie questioned. 

"No, I've just said that for nothing." Steve replied, pausing for a moment. "Yes I'm sure. Really, I promise it's fine."

"Alright then, you're on. Me and the tiny terror will be round later. Be warned though, she's teething and hates every second of it" Eddie nervously laughed.

"I'm looking forward to it. See you at five if that works?"

"Yeah 5 works for us, see you then" Eddie smiled "I'd best pick up the groceries and head out, Wayne's been left with her and he was working last night" he gestured to his cart.

"Best hurry up then. See you later Munson." Steve called as he turned around to continue his grocery shopping and waving goodbye.

"Catch you later Harrington." Eddie said, walking away. Dinner with Steve Harrington, how did Eddie get this lucky he wondered. 

Steve had walked down three aisles before realizing he hadn’t been paying attention or grabbed anything that he had actually needed. Instead he couldn’t stop worrying about what he would make. What could he make that all three of them could have? It had been awhile since he’d watched Holly when she was a baby which was making it hard to remember what a seven month old could have.

He rolled his eyes at Robin’s last message before switching to his notes app to add to his grocery list. She wasn’t going to leave him alone but it still didn’t feel like the right time. Eddie clearly has so much going on right now. He didn’t want Eddie to have to worry about trying to make time for a relationship too, that is if he even would want one with Steve.

The rest of the time spent grocery shopping and the drive home flew by with Steve’s mind somewhere else. By the time he got home he couldn’t even remember what really happened after seeing Eddie. Once all of the groceries were put away, leaving what he’d need for dinner tonight out by the stove, he went upstairs to change. Standing in front of his closet he wasn’t sure if he should change anymore. Would Eddie think Steve was trying to impress him? Would he think Steve meant it to be more than just dinner? He decided to just change out of his t-shirt and into a polo, feeling that was a good middle ground. He glanced at his alarm clock by his bed to see if he had time to fix his hair a little, the only way he could was if he rushed his cooking. It wasn’t a hard decision to make. Sure he liked to look nice but this was about trying to do something nice for Eddie. He’d rather take his time to make sure the pasta and garlic bread came out perfect. It felt like Steve had been doing ok on time when he heard a knock on his door.

"Come on in, the door is unlocked and I'm in the kitchen!" Steve yelled.

“Hey Harrington, trouble one and two are here” Eddie said loudly as he opened the door and walked in. 

"Hey! I'm just finishing up. Dinner should be ready in about five minutes."

"Is it cool if I set little miss up in the living room whilst you're finishing up?" 

"Of course! You do whatever you need to. I have an old portable high chair attached to a kitchen chair for her. I still had it left from babysitting Holly. Let me know if you need anything at all while you set up!"

Eddie left Nova in her carseat and proceeded to open the pack and play up. Each time he did this it became easier. Open, pull, pull, push down and place the mat. Less than a couple of minutes later the pack and play was set up with a few toys in it. 

"Look at Stevie being all fancy with a fancy chair for you ay squirrel" Eddie said to Nova "Thanks, was just going to pop her into her pack and play for the evening but this is better" 

"No problem! I'll be in there in just a second with everything."   

"You cool with a couple soft toys on the table? She's already eaten and she won't give me a moment to eat if she isn't occupied" Eddie shouted through to Steve as he took Nova out of her seat and took her coat off. 

"Of course!"

"There you go then little miss, you sit there and behave" Eddie said to Nova as he placed her in her seat and then sat next to her. “So you know what's been going on with me. What about you? What’s the heartbreaker of Hawkins been up to recently?"

"Not a whole lot really. Just working and a few dates here and there but that's about it really."

“No one catching your fancy to keep around?” Eddie questioned, looking over at Nova and playing with her toy with her and he tried to eat. 

"Yes and no. Just not really any of the dates I've been on lately."

“That sucks man, I’m sorry” 

"It's fine really. Just gotta wait for the right time with the right one. It'll happen eventually. I'm not in a rush."

“That’s good then, just enjoy it then I guess” Eddie shrugged.

"How's work going?"

“Busy but that’s not always a bad thing” Eddie answered, moving Nova's hand away from his hair without even really looking at her. 

"Well good."

After their meal had been finished and they had caught up on everything they made their way through to the living room. Eddie placed Nova in her pack and play before going and sitting on the couch. 

"So, you don't have to answer if you don't want to but how did you end up as her guardian?"

“My sperm donor decided he didn't want her, she was going to end up in the system if I didn’t take her in.” Eddie shrugged. 

"Oh damn. That's great that you aren't letting her end up in the system though. How long have you had her?"

“Only like 5 weeks.” Eddie answered, "somehow feels like longer and so much shorter though" 

"How's that going? It's gotta be a big adjustment."   

“Yeah it really has been. I’m so lucky she’s a good baby overall, people in the park have been really good and gave us a load of things for her. There's a mom, Aimee, that helps me to look after her when I'm working.”

"That's good. I'm glad you have people helping you. You know you can ask me for help too, right?" 

“Missing being the babysitter are you?” Eddie joked.

"Maybe a little. Don't you dare tell the kids though. They bother me enough."

“Secrets safe with me dude.” Eddie laughed.

"Good! You're welcome to hangout for a little while if you'd like. We could watch a movie."

“Yeah sounds good to me, lay a film on me”.  

They decided on Captain America and The Winter Soldier to watch and they carried on talking.

They had just got past the part in the movie where The Winter Soldier had attacked Steve and Natasha before being revealed to be Bucky when Eddie's eyes started to droop. Being filled with good food, tired from looking after a baby and working meant that once it started there was no stopping it. Eddie was asleep a couple of minutes later. 

"Alright Nova, looks like it's just you and me now." Steve said softly as he got up to retrieve some of the toys she had been playing with earlier. "I just have a phone call I need to make. I'll be there where I can see you ok?" He told her as he pointed towards the doorway to the kitchen. Thankfully the phone was right next to the door of the kitchen so he could easily see Nova while on the phone. It was just past seven so hopefully he wouldn't be interrupting dinner or calling too late. 

"Hello?" A familiar voice answered. 

"Hey Nancy. Hope I'm not calling at a bad time but I'd actually like to talk to your mom if she's not too busy." Steve tried to hide how awkward it felt talking to Nancy. They had broken up ages ago but now they just remained civil, not having a conversation much past 'how are you' when they had to see each other because of her brother. 

"Just a second. I'll go get her." Nancy replied before he heard the sound of the receiver being placed on the counter. 

"Steve, what a lovely surprise. How have you been, dear?" Mrs. Wheeler asked after a few moments of muffled conversation.

"I've been good, thanks. I was actually calling to see if you possibly still had any of Holly's old baby stuff that you might be willing to part with?" Steve asked hesitantly. 

"Of course I do! When is the baby due? I'm sure I can have Ted and Mike pull the stuff down from the attic." 

"Oh actually, she's already here. I just found out that a friend has a baby now. I know he's already got some stuff but I remember how quickly Holly out grew her stuff and figured he could probably use some more if you don't mind." Steve knew Mrs. Wheeler would be likely to help but he didn't want to sound like he expected it. 

"I don't mind one bit! I'll have the boys pull stuff down in the morning and you can stop by in the afternoon if you're free." 

"That would be great! I don't have work tomorrow and can stop by. Thank you so much Mrs. Wheeler. I really appreciate it." 

"Stop it, you know you can call me Karen. It's not a problem at all. You did plenty for us with Holly anyway."

"I didn't mind. Holly was great. Thanks again Karen! I'll see you tomorrow!" He knew Eddie hadn't asked for help but seeing how quickly Eddie had fallen asleep and how stressed he probably was just made Steve want to do whatever he could to make things even a little easier on his friend. 

As he walked back to Nova he could see how tired she was. He carefully lifted her up and grabbed the bag Eddie had brought with her stuff. It had been a while since he'd watched a kid so young but he found it easy to remember everything as he got Nova changed and ready to go to sleep. Steve didn't know what Eddie usually did to help her sleep but figured gently rocking her while he sat on the couch was a good enough place to start. He had wanted to be a little upset when she reached up and tightly held on to a lock of his hair but looking down at her, he just couldn't be mad at the adorable little girl in his arms. Once she was fast asleep and back in her pack and play, he grabbed a blanket from a closet in the hallway and covered Eddie with it. He couldn't help but smile looking over at the two of them. Steve had to push down the thoughts of wanting to tell Eddie how much he cared for him, he had enough going on. He might not be able to tell him but if Eddie was committed to giving Nova the best life he could then Steve would be right there with him as much as Eddie would allow. 

Steve was just about to head upstairs to get himself ready for bed when a loud bangs had started coming from his front door. He opened the door just enough for him to be visible as he leaned against the door frame. 

“Why are you kids here so late?” Steve demanded.

“Are you going to let us in or not?” Dustin asked. One of these days he was going to get this kid to understand that he needed to work on his tone.

“Absolutely not!” Steve scoffed.

“Why not? Is it because your kid is asleep? Why didn’t you tell us Steve!” Dustin yelled. 

“I swear to god Henderson if you wake them up I’m not taking you anywhere or letting you use the pool for at least two weeks.” Steve grumbled.

“So I was right then! Why didn’t you tell us? Why did we have to find out through Mrs. Wheeler?” 

“There’s nothing to tell you.”

“Are you kidding me? You having a kid is definitely something you should have told us. I mean we all knew you slept around so it was bound to happen.”

“Did you just call me a slut?”

“That’s not the point Steve. The kid. Tell me.”

“She’s not mine dude.” 

“You don’t have to lie to me.”

“I’m not lying. She’s really not mine. It’s just not my place to talk about it, ok? Now get the hell out of here because if you wake Eddie or the baby up it really will be two weeks.” Steve said as he shut the door before Dustin had the chance to respond. Heard a muffled Dustin ask if it was Eddie’s from the other side of the door but he wasn’t willing to open it again to answer him. Dustin could ask Eddie when he got the chance. He had enough going on and didn’t need Dustin or the others bothering him on top of that. For now Steve just hoped that no one else showed up so Eddie could get an obviously very much needed good night’s sleep.

[penncilkid]

Hello hello! My name is PK and I'm a fervent enjoyer of non-canon ships. I'm not a fic writer exactly but I've been told "Where's the fic OP" twice now by my friends. So I thought I'd format one of my fic-adjacent ramble sessions for Tumblr!

Pairing: Milo/David [No Sweetheart or Angel, wanted to go easy on myself] [MDNI*] [Let's call this "canon reminiscent /lh]

Word Count: 3.2 K

*(I wouldn't consider this smut by any means but there's a few lines that make me want to add this as a tag)

[As a reminder, I diverge from canon quite a bit with this. This is just one route I could see leading to Milo and David getting together]

My vision for this pair is that they start getting closer in a more than just friends way a little bit after Gabe dies. Not immediately because have some decorum, but it would start during that transition period for David as Alpha. Asher is trying his best to help but is also grappling with the whole Beta thing, so he feels like he's in a complex position. But him and Milo can see that David's not doing great so Milo's like "Fine, I'll bite the bullet" and tries to confront David about it.

At first it's subtle, asking David if he needs help with something, if he wants anyone from the pack to stay after for meetings, if he wants them to pick up a shift so he can have the day off, etc. But David is too stubborn to accept any of it so he keeps brushing them off. This ends up culminating in a "fight" one day where Milo again tries to make an offer that David shoots down. Milo sort of snaps and is like "Alright, what the fuck gives? Why are you acting like you're too good to get help anymore, David?" David says he doesn't know what he's talking about, Milo calls bullshit. It doesn't turn into a screaming match but it's enough of a heated argument that Milo storms out of the den.

In the days following, Milo either calls out sick, switches shifts with people, anything to avoid seeing David. David brushes it off, thinking he's got more important things to worry about if Milo's going to throw a fit. But of course, Ash being Ash means this stuff can't fly for long, so he tells both David and Milo that he needs help with something at an odd time of day and then "coincidentally" doesn't show up. When Milo gets to the den, he's real tempted to get back in his car and leave. It's a mix of still being a little frustrated with David and being embarrassed that this "fight" has gone on for as long as it has. He walks up to David (who was waiting outside for Asher) and is like "Lemme guess, you're waiting for Ash?" "How did you...?" "Fucker told me the same thing."

They do some lighthearted bitching about their friend, which eases the tension. There's a bit of silence and right as Milo gets ready to apologize for speaking out of turn, David apologizes first. He acknowledges that Milo was right in what he said and that he's been struggling with everything changing, but he hasn't wanted it to show on the outside. Milo makes a light jab at David, "Alright well did you really expect that to go over my head? C'mon, David, we've known each other since we were kids. Gimme some credit" To make up for it, the two of them go out to eat, all that's chill. Cut to when Milo gets home, maybe has a drink or two as he's winding down. David sends him a message, confirming he made it home alright (because I've always latched onto the idea that he's super attentive to that given what happened with Gabe). Milo sends David a quick reply and wonders why seeing that message made him feel some type of way (romantic? Who knows, not Milo that's for sure /lh)

Now if I remember correctly, the audio where Angel learns about Gabe, it's been around 3 years since his passing. Keeping this in mind and in the spirit of being canon reminiscent, I think around/after this point is when Milo's feelings for David start to really bubble up. They've been building for awhile, much to his dismay. He's trying to play it cool, but his heart's in his damn throat any time David touches him casually or whenever the two of them are assigned to a job together. And he knows it's getting bad enough where he might lose focus, so he swallows his pride and does what he's been avoiding for months, if not years: asking Asher for advice.

"Alright, look: You and me both know that you had a lil crush on David when we were in high school. How the fuck did you get over it? I'm drowning, Ash." If this conversation is happening on the phone or at Asher's place, cue him yelling to Babe that they owe him 20 bucks (because it's funny to me <3). Asher asks Milo why he wants to get over the feelings so bad and Milo's like "'Cause this is David we're talking about." "So what?" "We've got... history. That complicates shit all on its own." "And?" "....Alright fine, and I'm also terrified he's not gonna feel the same. Happy?" Asher is being the little shit that he is, putting his arm around Milo's shoulder. "Listen. If I know David— And believe me, I do— What ya gotta do is be direct. If he doesn't feel the same, that's one thing. But if you even want a chance, you gotta be straight up with him. If you tried to ask him out casually, he'll just assume you're being friendly because that's what you are right now. Friends." Milo takes all this in and is like, "Nope, just gonna shove these feelings down for eternity." "I'll tell Marie—" "I will beat your ass." He knows Asher has a point though. Any idea Milo might've had could be easily construed as them just chilling as friends. But he doesn't really act on anything for awhile.

Now, before we get into the next phase of this, some added backstory: David had a crush on Milo growing up. I'm thinking a little after high school (won't say college necessarily since I don't picture them in college but like, young adulthood phase). He'd always found Milo incredibly attractive and found his boldness admirable in general. David was constantly thinking about what he had to do for others and how to make the pack look good (since he was the Alpha's kid then the pack Beta). Milo always felt incredibly refreshing to be around. But he figured Milo would never be interested in because David's just himself so he eventually got over it. Cut to that argument him and Milo had a few years back. He remembers that night when they made up because dinner had been fine but all he could do was focus on Milo. It felt nice to just hang out with him without the pressures of being Alpha. And he enjoyed listening to him talk about anything because he always had a strong opinion. I think around then is when his past feelings awoke again but there was a new obstacle: He was the Alpha of the pack. It wasn't like before, things were different. He'd never have a chance to pursue Milo without feeling like he had pushed Milo into a corner somehow. So again, he tried his best to push his feelings down, appreciate and value the friendship he had with Milo and leave it at that. It was enough to just have Milo in his life, even if it wasn't going to go any further.

Back to how these two end up together: the Moonbound Solstice. They're all at David's place, everyone's having a good time together. Milo's chilling, talking to someone from the pack when Asher cuts in and is like "Sorry, just gonna steal him for a minute" "Ash, you can't just— AY okay okay I'm coming" They walk off, somewhere far from the kitchen to minimize the risk of David overhearing. In hushed voices: "Alright, so what's the plan?" "Ash, what the fuck are you talking about?" "Milo, it's the Solstice. This is the perfect time to make a move." "Are you out of your damn mind? This is the last place I should be hitting on— On you know who." "What are you talking about it, it's perfect! The whole pack's here, no one would even notice." "Look, he's already got his hands full hosting the Solstice at his own place for a change. I'm just gonna chill and enjoy the night for what it is." Asher is pouting as Milo walks off, immediately thinking of what he can do to help nudge David Milo's way. (Unhinged alt route: Ash giving Milo a flat so he has to stay the night)

Cut to the end of the night, people are heading out and whatnot. David is subtly trying to get people out because he loves his pack but his senses need a break. Asher (+ Babe, package deal) and Milo offer to stay and help clean, and David lets them since it's only a handful of people. Milo's keeping his cool, vibing to the much lower playing music when: "Babe, what do you mean you have a work call you need to take tonight? Can't it wait?" "Sorry, Ash, I need to be home in the next twenty minutes" "Alright. Guess we're heading early." Milo thinks nothing of it until he makes eye contact with Babe. They smile with a sickeningly sweet wave. Those bastards. Before Milo can try to rope Ash into staying somehow, the two of them are gone.

When Milo and David are alone, Milo tries his best to focus on the task at hand because feelings or not, he's not gonna do a shit job at cleaning so David has to clean up after him. Once the bulk of it is done, David mentions that he needs to grab something from upstairs or maybe says he's going to go change out of his clothes (I imagine he put on something better looking but not as comfortable for the solstice). Milo's chill with that, getting his keys, phone, other personal belongings together. He happens to slip into the kitchen though, stealing a bit more of the food David had made for the solstice. While he's stealing (said with love), he hears very close to his ear: "You can take some home if you want." He nearly punches David, gripping his arm as he tries to slow his heart rate. "You tryin' give a guy a heart attack, Shaw (/lh)" because he legit didn't hear David come back downstairs. "Maybe if you weren't busy trying to steal some food, you would've heard me— Greer (/lh)." Milo rolls his eyes with a grin and there's a moment of quiet when he realizes his hand is still on David's arm.

He lets go, clearing his throat, confirming that it's actually cool if he wants to take some of the food home with him. David says sure, giving him a container to fill (or Milo takes whatever the food came in, not sure what I'm picturing David's cooking set-up to be). David walks Milo to the door (as a good host does) and the two of them talk in the doorway for a few minutes about upcoming jobs, responsibilities, all that formal shit. There's another quiet moment as the two of them watch each other. Inside, Milo's like "Alright, no one else is here. This is as good a chance as any." The second he gets ready to ask David out on a more proper date, David instead says "Good night, Milo" and essentially closes the door in his face. Milo stares for a moment before cursing himself in Spanish (my HC), walking to his car and muttering about how "Of course he was just being polite, what the fuck were you thinking?" On the other side of the door, David is groaning into his hands, face warm as he tries to calm down because he came way too close to making a move on Milo.

Intermission (Wow, you're still reading? Damn /pos): I wanted to think of how to push them closer to a confession before they actually get together and eventually settled on "sickfic shenanigans". Insert deliriously sick Milo whose phone died and he can't find a charger for the life of him so David goes over to his place to check on him. Initially, he's trying to get David to leave because "I can handle myself fine". But that doesn't last long because admittedly, he feels like shit and has been for the past 12 hours. The dynamic quickly turns into Milo convincing David to stay then being so sick his filter is hanging on by a thread (/lh). "Why do you have to go rush off so fast?" "Milo, I have a pack to take care of—" "First off, I'm part of the pack— (cue Milo coughing) And second, they'll be fine without their Alpha for a few hours." Milo's playing it off as lighthearted but David can tell he doesn't want to be cooped up inside alone on top of feeling like shit physically. A little later, when Milo's on the verge of falling asleep (as many do while sick), he's like "Y'know, it's fucking wild you don't got a mate, David. Like look at you. Doesn't make sense" David laughs at first, thinking Milo's sick delirious (which he is, but that's affecting his filter, not the validity of his words). He's like "ay, why are you laughing, I'm serious. Look— if I were ya mate, I'd treat ya right. I'd cook, I'd work extra hours so I could see ya, I'd make sure we're the best dressed wherever we go— not to mention, I got a great dick." David writes this off as Milo being sick and spewing nonsense but never forgets the words. Meanwhile, Milo (after getting over the sickness) is convinced he dreamt saying any of that to David.

Back to the present, David's been a bit stressed with work as of late so Asher suggests the pack take a trip/weekend vacation. He says he'll handle figuring everything out, letting David take a backseat this time. They go somewhere, a resort, a hotel, something that involves people having rooms they're staying in. Everyone's having a good time, chilling all day, night rolls around. David's in his room when he realizes he forgot to pack something— can be anything. Toothpaste, a charger, something for his hair, the specifics aren't important. He texts Asher, asking if he has the thing he forgot and Ash is like yeah. David asks Ash which room he's staying in, Ash texts him the room number. David leaves his room, goes there, knocks and waits patiently. Door opens, and who's standing there? Milo, shirtless and in the middle of brushing his teeth or some shit.

David's checking his phone to see if he went to the wrong room but nope, numbers match. "Asher must've made a typo. I just needed to borrow something from him." "Well, what did you need? Maybe I have it." Before David can leave, Milo's busy ushering him in, closing the door so he can finish brushing his teeth before finding what David needs. They're making idle conversation, talking about what they spent their respective days doing. While Milo's talking, David's kind of staring at his back, not processing a word he's saying. Milo turns around and notices and is like "What? Don't tell me there's a bug on me and you didn't say shit? (/lh)" and David is trying to think of a good cover up. Milo tries to lighten the mood, says he's just messing with David before going to find whatever David's looking to borrow. He finds it, hands it over when for a split second, his eyes land on David's crotch. David leaves shortly there after but all night, Milo's like "...That was a boner... why the fuck did he have a boner?" But again, Milo's mind is like "Nah, I'm reading this wrong somehow."

Now, I'm painting a picture: it's the next day, Ash, Milo, David, few others from the pack plan on doing something together while on the trip. Asher gets there a bit late but is somehow on time compared to David, who shows up minutes after (that man was up all night pining). Ash notices Milo's not here yet and has a devious idea (as always). He asks David to go check on Milo so they can go. "Why me?" "You were the last one here, it's only fair. Now shoo." David rolls his eyes but goes, getting to Milo's room, knocking. He can hear Milo's definitely inside because he's cursing and complaining. He knocks again before the door swings open to reveal a mildly disgruntled Milo Greer (my vision is he's in pants and a white tank with his name chain. The in between outfits outfit).

He asks what David is doing there, David explains that Asher sent him to pick up Milo, Milo's like "What time is it— Jesus fucking Christ." The issue at hand is Milo can't find an article of clothing that he swears he put in his bag. He's been trying to get by with alternative options but none of them look the way he wants them to, which is making him quietly lose his shit. David stifles a laugh, to which Milo lasers in on. "And what do you think you're laughing at?" "You haven't changed since we were kids, that's all." Milo scoffs but admittedly, the sentiment puts a smile on his face. Almost immediately after that moment, he finally finds what he was looking for (tucked under something, irrelevant right now). He starts to get ready, pulling his shirt on, buttoning it up but let's say a button or two is fighting him for whatever reason. Without a second thought, David walks up, buttoning it for Milo. Milo's having an internal moment as a result, staring at David's hands then his face. David finishes and looks up to catch Milo staring. He clears his throat, saying something about waiting in the hall when Milo catches his wrist.

"Can I take you out on a date?" "What?" "I don't know what or where yet, but I just— I know this is probably stupid and I'm shooting myself in the foot here, but Asher's gonna kick my ass if I don't do something so— Can I take you out on a date, David?" David's taken aback. "Wait... so you were serious. That time you were sick. All that stuff you said about being a good mate for me." "THAT WASN'T A DREAM?" Cue Milo letting go of David's hand and nearly cursing himself out, running a hand through his hair because now he's mortified. "I can't believe I actually said all that shit to you—" "Did you mean it?" "Huh?" For the first time, David's not looking at Milo like a friend or pack Alpha. The look in his eyes screams pure, unfiltered attraction. "Yes or no, Milo." Milo's face is hot, "Course I meant it. I'd treat you great if you gave me the chance to show you." David steps closer, gripping Milo's face gently and tilting it up towards his. "Show me." Milo grins before pulling David down to him, the kiss they shared far better than the ones he remembered from spin the bottle games they'd played as teens. This kiss felt deeper and closer than that could ever compare. The moment they break away, gasping for air, Milo's busy unbuttoning his shirt. David asks what he's doing, to which Milo replies "I'm about to savor as much time with you as I can before I have to see Asher's smug face. Unless you'd like to explain how your hair became a mess between the time you left to find me and when you get back?" David laughs before pulling Milo to him again.

So yeah, that concludes this fic adjacent ramble (/lh)! I love rarepairs and rambling, so if people enjoy this, I may format some other rambles as they arise. I think I've got some Sam/David tucked away somewhere, so let me know. If you actually read all of this, wow, okay, thank you (/lh /pos)

[bloogers-boogers]

Kyle Broflovski/ Eric Cartman (SP fic)

('What's up with the fatass?')

/Let me slide into your mind/ part 4

'Technically, I'm not gay if I'm testing, right?'

Slight warning ⚠️ this fic is kinda deranged and would probably (will) be outta the ordinary, wacky in a sense but also trauma? Maybe, idk could be? Mmhh..

~~~~~~~

He was stoked by the confession, couldn't even manage to bare a retort back with some snarky comment. A brief silence, a light breeze brushing their way.

He looked at Jackson's green eyes, as the sunset reflected on them. Making this all feel even more like a fever dream.

He chuckled nervously, not sure if the feeling he felt was flattery or uneasiness.

How the hell is he gonna get out of this?

On one hand, Jackson was Stewart's best friend: who is seemingly the leader; he was also a very important part of their friend group and they wouldn't bat an eye to trow him out to the gutter over Jackson.

So if he were to reject Jackson now, would that demolished all opportunity to still be friends? Would they kick him out? Would they target him again?

It's not like it's his fault that Jackson was some gaywad and was madly in love with him, but they will definitely side with nerd geek over his coolness.

On the other hand, he also sorta liked Jackson? Not in the gay way ofcourse, but he's warming up to him. Also, Jackson was the first to talk to him and even somewhat got along when he first arrived in this damn town.

He's been nice, a little hot headed but he is also kinda into that aswell, helping him with studying, oddly enough they do get along and they also share a certain type of humor aswell!

It'd be a pity if he ruined a possible great ally over some dumb crush. Besides, he's fucking rich.

And he doesn't make a big fuss over him taking over and picking what they'll watch on Netflix in his big flat tv unlike Tolkien.

He was finding it quite difficult to pick what to do, it's not like Jackson was bad looking.. not the type you'd be horrified by even the thought of holding his hand type of way. He in fact is quite attractive for a guy, no homo, but he COULD endure being in a relationship with him if it were necessary..

".. y-you can't be serious are you?" He mustered out, expecting to be contradicted and be told it was just a fucked up joke.

Jackson hold on to his hands making him eye him weirdly, his mouth flattened, "I've never been this serious in my entire life, Eric."

The way he said it made it all seem like some kdrama rom-com, his eyes landed on to his lips then back to Jackson's eyes feeling nauseous.

This was.. different.

His heartbeat pounded recklessly, as he felt his eyes squinted shut, maybe expecting something more unintentionally leaning forward.

But the entire mood was interrupted by two other obnoxious boys.

"Goddammit, took you long enough!" Stewart shouted, as he walked towards them alongside Hershey who brushed some leaves off him coming from behind a tree.

"You guys ruined the mood, assholes," Jackson groaned annoyed, rolling his eyes and letting go from one hand still latching on to the other.

"A confession shouldn't take that long," Stewart complained, as he shoved his hands inside his pants.

"Yeah, it's been like two weeks and dog park hadn't gotten the hint at all," Hershey huffed as if he was the one desperate for it to be over.

"I would've made him my bitch by now if I were you," Stewart kept on rambling, "like, it's not hard to say 'I like you, be mine' or some shit like that."

"You lack skill," Hershey joined in the mutual bashing on their friend's timing.

He felt himself small, looking at the three as they banter like if he had actually said yes to Jackson's confession, as he had no other choice but to be his—

"Wait, you said this been going on for awhile?," he mustered out confused, it wasn't long since he's got there.

"Ha, you blind fuck. I guess southies lack attention skills too? Ofcourse it was. Why would you think we'd even let you in our friend group to begin with?" Stewart commented casually but was nudged lightly from Jackson as a 'that's enough' kinda way, earning a eye roll from the redhead as a response, "you've gone soft," he mustered.

He felt like he wanted the ground to swallow him, that only means one thing. Saying 'no' will be his dismay, he'll be cast aside if he were to reject Jackson.

He bit his lip, contemplating the situation he's put in. He hangs out with Jamie but that wouldn't be enough to not be targeted, and he doubted the brunette would even care if he were.

Unlike with these assholes he felt a sense of security, a place he can run off to and shield himself from being a tp loser.

"Jackson approached you with all intention to fuck you, he saw you walking near our neighborhood while we were skateboarding looking like you were about to pass out and in his eyes you were the most—," Hershey teased deviously, before being nudged angrily by the blonde.

"Okay, guys that's enough," he blurted out embarrassed, putting his attention on his own quietness.

"He's into bigger boys," Stewart added with a wicked grin, now Jackson shoved him aside as he snickered and ruffled his blonde locks playfully.

"So you two going out now or what?," Hershey then spoke after a brief silence and some rough play from both best friends.

He couldn't help himself feel flustered, if his actual friends were there they'd bash on him for being a complete gaywad or even saying something remotely gay. Which is why he retrained himself by doing many things like; karaoke or dressing himself up and dancing with cut out celebrities he liked, makeup, tea parties or gushing over stuff animals, painting his nails and trying out his mother's heels..

Not that he's gay, but he genuinely did enjoy those things.

But these dumbasses? They don't seem to care at all.. they even expected him to act a little gay...

"Maybe.." he blurted out, startling Jackson who looked his way with sparkling eyes and blushed face.

Okay, he was kinda cute.

°°°°

So it's official, he's now dating Jackson Hu. You may ask, what're the benefits of being the blonde's boyfriend?

They're plenty, in a matter of fact. There wasn't even a single student that had said anything negative his way or any tp comments. On the contrary, he's been making a lot of new friends!

They actually approached him with all intention of wanting to befriend him and hang out. Unlike with the southies they always nagged and nagged that he was some burden they couldn't just get rid off.. and as much as that shit did kinda hurt him, he wouldn't deny he hated them aswell!

These north parkers had made him somewhat feel welcome even if they started with a rough start. They invite him to parties, games and do shit together! Yes, they were common bashing and naming, but that's just typical kids behavior.

They treated him like an actual friend than some pest. And are even very openly affectionate to each other, unlike with his old gang that type of affection was mostly excluded from him and exclusively just a 'bff' thing only the gay bitches of Stan and Kyle had, and sometimes Kenny.

Ofcourse Kenny has time in time proven to him that he does care and he doesn't mind being all open for a hug from Eric Cartman, compared to Hippie dick and Jersey jew that would immediately make an assumption that he was scheming some shit or they'll just stand awkwardly not daring to do something back.

They weren't very opened with hugs or hand holding when it came to the three, not that he couldn't say the same, by that point it was just too weird and kinda an anomaly. He felt he had a whole different thing going on between his dynamic with Stan and Kyle, contrast with Butters and Kenny.

He could be freely emotionally himself with the blondes but with the 'super best friends'? He just couldn't, it was always a hesitating thought and just searching for a opportunity to do so.

He could count the times they had hugged with all intention to do it, with his fingers.

They weren't as evenly close as he'd would like..

But the kids from North park, his now gang. They're so— chill, and cool. And never excluded anyone from giving some love, maybe because they kinda acted like hippies? Even though they claimed just being liberals or some pretentious shit like that.

He could hug Stewart who is the most jock douche of the group outta nowhere and he wouldn't even bat an eye! He'll hug him back or pat him lightly like an actual bro.

Not that he's touched starved ofcourse but..

It actually feels nice.

Other of the good perks of being Jackson's boyfriend, is that he feels more freeing on being more himself in a sense?

He can do things he'd normally think pussies would do, being reassured by his friends and boyfriend that the things he liked didn't defined his sexuality and all that lame opened minded shit.

He loved it, he also liked how Jackson looks at him, and call him by pet names.. even the pecks on his cheek before entering class or being walked home. It made him feel fuzzy and funny..

Also, being completely loaded he buys him stuff! Shoes and sometimes even dresses cause he somehow found out he liked drag!

And his friends, they are willing to try things his southie friends would call him lame for! They even gone to a karaoke and sang together.

But not only that has changed, but he's feeling a little different since his move. The town really is making him shift in to some.. he couldn't recall what, but he feels he could change for the better being.

He also noticed a huge change on his mom too!

She turned PC not long ago.. he wasn't entirely sure what started it but she did mentioned she turned a member at work and that she'd be a better mom from now on, the typical shit he's already use to hearing from her emotional outburst or when she's drunk.

But he's noticed she has kinda kept her word for it, the other day he mentioned about feeling a little insecure about his weight now that he had a boyfriend and all, she actually talked to him like them parents he'd see on TV 'tell me more, I'd like to be of help' 'you know you're perfect in every way, you don't have to change who you are for anyone' 'if he doesn't like the way you are then he isn't for you' 'I think you should try doing a diet if that makes you feel any better but you really are beautiful, poopsikins' giving him actual advice instead of running away!? Actually listening to him instead of distracting him with toys and food.

They also been getting along better and they talk more, his mom even admitted to him that she's been feeling lonely for years now and that loneliness just drove her into making him her only friend and she now realized how bad that truly is for his development. He even admitted how much it affected him to not actually have a father figure in his life, the absence and hollowness it felt everytime he saw his friends bond with their dads. And it was all just emotional and heartwarming moment between the two. A bunch of sobbing and apologetic promises that he wasn't sure they'll actually commit.

Maybe they could fix things out or maybe not? Only time will decide.

He layyed on his bed recalling his mother's words once more, feeling a tight feeling in his chest, hiding under the covers with a soft smile.

North park kinda rules.

°°°°

He was panicking, Jackson had stolen him a quick kiss on the lips. It was a small brush but he felt like he was swooning, being swooped up in the air by his strong arms as he carried him bridal style to the nursery cause he clumsily sprained his ankle in p.e class.

"How you're feeling, babe?" He asked softly, while he couldn't help but look at him dreamily.

"Good.." he mustered with a dumbfounded smile, gripping on to his shirt, butterflies popped inside his stomach. And with out further hesitation he place his hands on his cheeks and made him leaned forward, planting a passionate kiss, wrapping his arms around his neck as he felt Jackson deepening it before breaking it off.

Still inches apart, "Goddamn that was amazing.." he mustered out dumbfounded, eyeing him soft, "maybe I should carry you often if that makes you want to kiss me like that more," he admitted with a cheeky grin, nuzzling his nose against his.

"Maybe you should..?" He teasingly said, eyeing him playful before planting a small peck on his lips.

In a blink of an eye, after a couple of days

They were found making out furiously in the living room couch of his mansion. He couldn't help himself, he was feeling deluded by all of things Jackson did to him, he wanted to be touched, kissed, the pleasure it gave him when he'd grabbed his waist and pulled him closer. It was amazing.

'Technically, I'm not gay if I'm testing, right?'

He gripped on the blonde's t-shirt, making him mumbled a couple of 'mmph' before being sunk in deeper on to the couch, hearing him whisper sweet nothings to him as a voice echoed the room, snapping him out of him.

"Cartman~" Jackson kept murmuring his name against his neck, but not with his usual voice, it was..

He pushed him away with his hands against his boyfriend's chest slightly, as his eyes widen in contemplated horror.

"Kyle?"

Kyle found himself on top of him looking at him with a devilish smile, before grinning wide like a triumphant.

"AHHH!!!" He screamed like a chick that was about to get murder in some classic 90s horror movie, pushing him off from his lap as he rested his weight on his elbow still eyeing the boy.

Now vision getting clearer, as a concerned Jackson looked his way.

"Babe are you alright? Who the fuck is Kyle?" He asked, standing up; as he had fallen to the floor by being pushed so abruptly.

He panted heavily, still grasping some air as he clenched hard on to his chest, this shit is gonna give him a heart attack.

"Is this because you miss your old town? Is that it?" Jackson still continued to asked worrisome, before biting his lip as he contemplated something looking at the floor.

"Y-yeah.." he managed to mustered, still, the scare was still haunting him.

Jackson look at him with pitying eyes, "do you want.. I can give you your password, maybe that'll make you feel better? Only if you promise me you would be discreet about it?" He tried reassuring, approaching cautiously and sitting far in the other end of the couch.

"U-huh, that'd be awesome, thanks.." squinting his eyes shut and nodding fanatically, he took this as a good opportunity to talk with Kenny, he hasn't been able to contact him in so long.

He gulped hard, sweat falling drastically as if a bucket of water had been splashed on his face, now looking at Jackson's eyes, feeling himself get calmer with each passing second.

Being back home, he let out a long tiresome sigh, the episode from early still was eating him at whole, he needed to calm down or he could mess things up with Jackson.

He grabbed his laptop and typed in the password and email Jackson gave him.

And lord and behold, he was now online.

Another thing he had to do was change his number, as people there would recognized immediately the area code of South Park. Bad thing about it, is that his now friends erased all his contacts excluding his mom and family (cousin and uncle's) luckily for him, he did manage to slip out saying Butters was a cousin when he notice his friends doings.

Finally back on his old account '@ EricCart_brah' he looked for Kenny's active status, he knew by this hour he'd be back home and scrolling endlessly on his phone ignoring his parents common arguments.

Kenny Mccormick online•

He bit his lip, he knew Kenny would demand answers because he's clearly been 'ignoring' him, which is why he told Butters to calm Kenny's tits down and tell him that he was just really busy, which wasn't far from the truth. In reality he was busy, being a North Parker wasn't easy you know!

'Sup poor boy' common, not too desperate, and quick to the point.

He waited a couple of dreaded seconds, as he looked at his screen. Kenny was taking his damn sweet time to read his message, longer than usual, oh, he must really be pissed. It was definitely on purpose cause Kenny would immediately reply back to him once receiving a message while being actively online the only times he wouldn't answer back immediately was when he was doing his shifts or walking Karen home from school.

It was their best friend thing to always prioritize their messages over anyone else's, they kinda agreed on doing it out of spite because Stan and Kyle once ignored them on the group chat a couple of years ago sliding into a roblox server with out them. Fucking dicks. They still couldn't somehow let that go.

After a minute, he finally read it, but it was left on seen. He frowned, 'Goddammit, kinny,' he thought.

'Typing...'

Those three minutes were torturous coming from Kenny.

Meanwhile he waited for Kenny to stop bitchin' with him, he scrolled through his inbox, he had two unread messages from Kyle and one from Stan, ofcourse he didn't bother answering so he left them unread, they're bitches anyways, and because they were very old messages too, like a day after his move and Stan's was at 3:00 am pretty much while he was still on the road to get to North park. But there was also messages from both Clyde and Craig, these weren't entirely far apart from the day he left south park but he was curious.

'Hey, fatboy, pleaseeeee come back I beg you🙏🏼' that was pretty much it with Clyde, sometimes he wondered if that dude was okay from the head, cause damn what gives?

And Craig's was just a '🖕🏼' he rolled his eyes, hoe.

*Ding*

About fucking time.

'Took you long, u got bored of your little north dickers?'

He snickered, now HE got his sense of humor.

'C'mon, Butt's didn't gave u mah mezzage?'

'He did'

'Okay, so Y u bitchin at me?'

'What's with the new account? Embarrassed by your people, fatboy?'

'Iz da it? U worried I forgot about u?'

'Seen'

Goddammit, 'I would never, asshole 🙄 yk I've been buzy with my move'

'Why r u writing with typos? I saw u got nice grammar in ur dumb np page'

'U stalkin me?'

'Yes, what're u gonna do about it? Send me a grenade via inbox?'

"Hahahaha!" He laughed out loud by Kenny's ridiculous shit talk, how he missed that.

'Don't be an ass🤣'

'Your so dumb...'

'*you're' he couldn't help but slapped himself in the head, what was all that about? Why did he correct that shit, he's acting like the dumb jew now.

'Sure, bitch. Okay, so how's it been?' Atleast Kenny seemed to shrugged it off easily, neither did he seemed angry anymore.

'Itz been good but itz lame ass fuck, wbu anything going on over there?'

'Not really, everything seems to mellow out since ur fat ass left town'

'Aye! Stfu!'

'It's true tho, everything is as boring like when we took that hunting bunny exhibit'

'Ugggh don't remind me🥱'

'Man, when would u come visit? Or is it like a temporary thing? C'mon tell me *dick sticker*'

'Not sure tbh, just hang in there got things handled from a tea just u wait👌🏼'

'This is my new number btw (+1)***-***-**** don't give it to those assholes of Stan and Kyeeel'

Kenballz added (+1) ***-***-**** to his contacts.

'U still angry at them for the party?'

'Nah... just want to be a dick to them thatz all'

'Fair'

'Gotta go, ttyl?'

'Sure'

He sighed exhausted sliding out from Kenny's dms, looking at the hour an it was just 2 am. Maybe he should give a peek at the hippie's message?

Stan Marsh offline• 25 min ago

'Hey, Cartman. Sorry about earlier, yk me and Kyle didn't mean to actually just not give a damn about you..

I kinda really feel bad about it rn.. hope you can forgive me? Even so, I wish you luck with the move. Ik how difficult it is to adjust to the changes but Ik you'll manage better than I ever did:)'

Way to make it gay Stan, he sighed, getting off from the couch and heading to his room in a slouch. In all honesty, he really wasn't angry at them, he kinda actually expected them to act like dicks? But still, something about Kyle just pissed him off, but being angry at Stan was very hard to do. He was so emotional and for some reason he pity him for it.

Maybe that's why he had a weak heart for Stan.

He layyed down reluctantly, opening his laptop once more, might aswell look at kyel's, or curiosity will get the best of him.

Kyle Broflovski offline• 2 hrs ago

'Hey fatass'

'Fuck u then'

Well, that was short and quick. He huffed throwing his laptop to his side, covering himself with his blanket kinda pissed off and dozing off to sleep.

°°°°

"Damn, theres a lot of people in your town," He said in a 'awe' looking at the crowd of people surrounding the mayor hall.

"Our town now, fatboy," Stewart added, wrapping a arm around his neck.

He blushed, they're very welcoming and friendly to him for some reason all of a sudden. Maybe he's been doing so damn good so far, his act has already went beyond the limits of fantastic, cause it seem his tp vibes weren't as strong as when he first arrived. He smiled accomplished.

Jackson eyed him from his side with a small wink.

He beamed even harder, he felt his cheeks stiffened by how much he was smiling that day.

He wrapped his arms around Stewart's waist resting his head against him while seeing the mayor walked towards the microphone.

"It's a nice evening today for our beautiful town," He began, it was an old man probably in his mid fifties, grey hair and had one of those fancy suits on.

"Today we've managed to make a great accomplishment, being at a rate of 55% of popularity," the man beamed proudly at the crowd.

The crowd roared cheerful, he even heard his friends shout '¡fuck yeah!'

He honestly didn't quite understand about the popularity ratings that was going on between states, but he honestly cared less it wasn't his problem.

"If we keep our rating up, will be in the 90% in lesser than a month," the man fist upwards to the air, "but that's not all, we've been given news that were offered for a possible show next fall!"

Everyone gasped, and he was left confused, just arching a brow.

'Who'd want to watch a show about some dumb town?,' he couldn't help but think about how lame that was, but said nothing. His friends seemed to be stoked about the idea.

Maybe that was his southie side speaking in him.

"Now moving that aside, time for the announcement for the winner of next judge for this yearly cat costume competition!" The man exclaimed, causing some of the people watched eagerly as the mayor took out a small piece of paper from the box to announce the winner.

"And the winner for this yearly competition is— Eric cartman?"

The people gasped as they all eyed him, even he was left bewildered.

He didn't recall ever written his name in that slip.

"It's the southie" he heard a man whispered, and a couple of others murmured.

But later roared cheerfully as they boost him upwards with their hands dragging him still dumbfounded to the stage.

"Go, Eric!" He heard his boyfriend screamed from afar, as he stepped on the stage, seemingly still confused.

He smiled awkwardly as he approached the mayor.

"Seems the town picked you for the role, it was just destined to happen," The man stated before gesturing the crowd to applaud.

He gulped seeing all those people cheering for him, it really boosted his ego and pride.

All the admiration he craved is now becoming overwhelming in a matter of seconds, the fact he just doesn't know, unaware of what's not knowledgeable maybe that's why he felt that hidden unease squeezing feeling inside his stomach.

After all that, he walked down stage and was greeted once more by his boyfriend who hugged him tightly.

"Congrats, baby nuts."

"I- I really don't know how my name got there?"

"Who cares? You got such an honorable role being from Shart Park," Stewart chimed in, approaching them with Hershey by his side.

"I suppose.. but I really don't know my role or anything?"

"Don't worry about it, we'll tell you everthing you need to know for the big day," Hershey added with a grin, "btw, Jacky your parents were looking for you just now."

Jackson groaned, "no fucking way, seriously? My god.."

"What's wrong, babe?" He eyed him curiously.

"It's- it's nothing, Eric," he shrugged giving a look at Stewart.

How fucking weird, he hated being excluded from shit.

Another day ended, and by that point and on he learned that this cat festival was a honoring tradition, the competition however was just as important than the actual festival itself so it was necessary to not mess it up or his reputation will go down the line. He did wonder why the hell they'd pick him for it, but it was way too beneficial to bail out from, he also liked that he was being recognized more by his name than by the town he was born in.

He looked through his clothing finding a perfect outfit for the evening, ignoring the voices from his head, the constant whispers and the small curses against him. Kyle's voice resonated in him like a damn devil, a curse yearning to release it's dangerous magic on him.

He wasn't sure why Kyle out of all people would be the one to haunt him. Okay, now that he thinks about it, he may be certain of why.

Ofcourse Kyle would be capable of doing that! He has always been envious of his luck and awesomeness, who wouldn't want to curse him more than Kyle ever did?

'Eric~'

"Shut the fuck up, kahal!" He screamed out, covering his ears.

'C'mon, Eric don't be such a wuss'

"I'm no wuss!"

'Ofcourse you are, fat boy'

"Aye! I ain't fat you dumb jew!"

'Don't belittle my people, fatass!'

"So stop using your dumb magic on me, and leave me alone!"

'Never, you're a traitor. A imposter'

"What're you talking about?""

'You really think these north pussies give a fuck about you? You're just a southie for them-'

"That's not true I'm changing!"

'No, you can never change. You got it in your blood, Eric. You'll be for ever be a bigoted south park faggot–'

"¡Shut up!" He hissed out, everything went silent and he no longer heard Kyle, "¡shut the fuck up!" He kept on whining while squinting his eyes shut, trying to shut all the demons out, falling on his knees now gripping on to his hair.

It was night time, meaning the beginning of the festival has now started, Jackson picked him up walking from hand to hand to the center of town. He visualize all the cute cats everywhere. He couldn't help but feel a pit in his stomach thinking about Mr kitty.

He still can't believe his mother forgot to bring Mr kitty! But he shouldn't have trust her knowing damn well she took some crack beforehand.

His cat would've been the cutest among all, sadly she would not be able to participate in such wonderful event.

'Maybe if you actually stayed in south park instead of moving your ass over here. You wouldn't be struggling about your cat, fatass'

"Quit it, Kahal! Not now" he hissed in a whisper as he side eyed his boyfriend who was seemingly distracted by some decorations.

Ofcourse Kyle wouldn't let him enjoy his night, his gonna follow him until he fucks up something.

'Don't blame me, this place sucks ass'

"It does not!"

'It does too'

"Nuh-uh!"

"Eric, are you alright?" Jackson snapped him out of it, now looking at his direction.

"Yeah baby, ofcourse I am!" He exclaimed nervously, "how about you show me those kitten mittens you told me about the other day?"

"Oh! Fuck yeah, dude!" Jackson beamed excited, before dragging him to somewhere else.

'How rude, bluntly ignores my presence'

"Shut up, Kahal. I don't want him to hear you!"

'Mhm, I don't see why you're so damn in to him, I'm soooo much interesting than him and you don't seem to like me like that?'

"Cause you're a stupid jew, that's why!"

'So you admit you're a gaywad?'

"Fuck off, dude." He shoved away with his free hand next to his face, as he were capable to shoo Kyle's annoying voice from him.

"Ms Ellen has always had the best of mittens," Jackson spoke, approaching a small stand letting go now from his hand as he gestured all the colorful mittens.

'*cough* gay *cough* *cough* what a gaywad'

"Tsch, quiet!" He sneered in a whisper, before continuously to eye Jackson in an awe.

He's so cute, he felt his eyelids fall slightly feeling that fuzzy feeling once more in his stomach. Now he wondered how he scored such a wonderful boyfriend with zero efforts!

'Stop looking at him like that, your eyes are gonna fall'

"Don't tell me what to do, Kyel," he mustered out while smiling dumbly, seeing how Jackson seemingly spoke as his blonde locks move in such a memorizing slow way.

'I'll give it two weeks max'

He heard that last bit but decided to ignore it, he is planning to enjoy his night with Jackson and succeed as a great judge.

Everything seemed to be going smoothly, he and Jackson had played many of the games there. It was just the two of them that night as both Hershey and Stewart we're doing their own thing with their girlfriends, so it'd made sense for he and Jackson to do the same.

"You know.. I'm glad you're here," Jackson said out of the blue, grabbing his attention.

"Yeah? Why?" He asked munching on a corndog.

"Well, normally I'd be alone in these type of things cause those assholes are always latching like slugs to their girlfriends and shit," he said, obviously referring to the guys, smirking slyly, "now I can do the same with out feeling envious of their own love life, let's be slugs together, baby nuts"

His heart skipped a beat, he smiled warmly.

Jackson approached him, a step forward planting a kiss on his cheek he instinctively closed his eyes not wanting for it to end.

'Dumbass, he doesn't like you. He likes that he's no longer the only gay one in town'

He frowned, as he opened his eyes once more softening seeing Jackson look his way in such a lovingly way.

He hold on to his hand, "don't worry, baby. I love you," he reassured more to himself than to his boyfriend.

Ofcourse he loves Jackson, why else would he feel this immense feeling inside his chest. He's a great friend not that he 'like-like' him like that, he's just so awesome and amazing to ignore, he stands up in the crowd, he's different.

'You're confused. You don't like him, you like feeling praised'

He moved his head frantically, dragging Jackson by the arm leading him to the apple bucket game where men surrounded it cheering for the next loser to grab a red apple among the greens while blindfolded.

'You can run all you want, but you know I'm right, fatass'

"We should try it out," he ignored the echoing voice against his ears.

"Sure, did I ever mentioned you I was stated 1st place state champion of apple bobbing?"

"Really?" He looked at him surprised, Jackson winked at him placing himself in line.

'Gay'

He scoffed, "grow up, Kahal. It's sooo 80s of you to be so close minded," commenting that as he stood next to Jackson sharing him a toothy smile.

'Ugh, you two gross me out'

'Why don't you set the bucket on fire? Wouldn't it be fun if you put gasoline inside and let the next player get it? Hahaha!'

He shook his head, "no, kahal, that's awful," whispering annoyed.

'You use to do it all the time with Butters and Kenny. What's the big deal now? Afraid your pussie friends can't deal with some actual fun?'

He gritted his teeth, clenching his free hand, eyeing the next player who was a blonde girl with two big ponytails.

'Dude, wouldn't it be awesome if we do one destiny final on her? Her hair is perfect to get-'

"No, it wouldn't be 'awsome', get over it" he stated still looking at the crowd.

'Man, what's happened to you'

He bit his lip to that, in all honesty he really thought it'd be funny to see the blonde chick be dragged by a horse because her hair was tangled and tied up on it's leash.

But that wasn't a North park way to think.

'But you're not from north park'

"Tsch, what did I tell you about reading my mind Kyel!," he blurted out, flinching once he noticed he screamed too loud causing a few people to look at him weird and Jackson to eye him carefully, "you're invading my privacy," he murmured in between teeth

'You do it all the time! Don't be such an hypocrite. You don't even know what personal space is'

"I feel like I've already said this many times, but are you alright, babe? You're acting like a little pyscho."

'Cause he is. Are you blind?'

"I'm fine, babe. Just ignore it." He shrugged now getting ready to play next.

"Ignore what?"

The game went on an he managed to witness the competitive spirit Jackson had, he was rabid to win a stubbornness no one can wear him off from, ruthless almost murderous over some dumb apples noneless!

'Pst, you never seem to care when I do it?'

"Shut up, kahal. It's different, my baby is gonna get hurt," he looked at the bloody looking hound who was glaring daggers at some big chunk of a man with a cool looking beard holding on to a couple of apples in his mouth, probably five.

No longer had their blindfolds on as they circled around each other as if they were about to go in combat. Jackson had three apples, making his cheeks look all puffed up like a angry squirrel. He would laugh by the adorable display but there were other more important matters in hands.

"Hon, why don't we just truce this and-?"

Everyone gasped, going all silent, before the beard dude spit out the apples from his mouth in a bursting laugh.

"Hahahahah! Awe, how cute. Oh southies and their stupidity, your tp boyfriend is such a loser! Ofcourse, you should definitely listen and be the typical whipped ass licking moron you are and ask for a small cease-fire?"

Jackson eyed the man up and down in a threatening manner silently warning him

"South- Park- ies" The man tilted his head with each pronouncing words, grinning confidently.

"Oooohhhh" everyone blurted out in a shared shocking response, as it was indeed a low blow to be called a south parker, a disgusting insult that's worse than being thrown actual feces in someone's face.

Jackson spit the apples he had out of his mouth and straight up lounge himself towards the man.

"TAKE THAT BACK!" Screamed back, punching and yanking the man's beard off.

"Goddamn," he whispered in disbelief.

'Guess your boyfriend is also kinda a little cookoo himself'

He watched bewildered by the intensity of the street fight being unfold, as people cheered like wild animals. He even notice his other friends were already there in the pile of people cheering Jackson on.

This reminded him of the time when Kyle force him to ride a bull for some dumb Terrance and Phillip dolls, he was damn determined to win them he didn't even care that he was a vietnamese prostitute for the temporary being signing him up for the bull ride contest not caring he was drop off by Leonardo dicaprio the next day from who knows what of a night.

That was some immense determinant stubbornness and a whole lot of obsessive competitive spirit.

'In my defense, I really wanted those dolls and you wasted all the damn money'

"Whatever, Kahal," He whispered with not much enthusiasm, looking at the blonde boy smirking confidently as he stood up like he had won some boxing match.

Jackson approached him smiling warming, placing a small kiss on his lips.

"Told you I was number one champion."

'I don't think that's how you play bobbing apples'

"Sorry he call you that, baby," he added lastly before hugging him 'comforting'.

'What's there to be sorry about? You are from South park'

He corresponded back, "thanks, babe," reassuring with a small hum, smiling lightly.

'Stop acting like you aren't, asshole'

°°°°

Being judge wasn't the difficult part is was the people who'd glare menacingly, who'd watch carefully and cautious as other competitors would look like pray, atleast those that seem so gullible that'll easily cease on losing which was rare cause north park; the ones from blood, conceived from the womb of a north park mother will never bail out until they give their last breathe those that were from other states however would budge in one or a couple of rounds depending on how far long they've lived in the town. Yes, rounds.

What he figured out about this whole cat costume competition wasn't exactly just cute kitties dress up in fancy wears, it was a matter of actual BATTLE. They'd prepare themselves in a cage putting two people in and place their cats on a rounded chair. Waiting to be judge as they place themselves in middle of both cats, rules were simple:

1. First cat to jump off the chair will guarantee the owner making the fist move starting first round.

Only thing that wasn't allowed was weapons (guns, knives, swords, grenades, wires, types of acids, any sort of dust powder and flame throwers).

He wasn't sure exactly why the last weapon was needed to be specified with red ink, but he was a man who didn't question much.

Pretty much anything else is valid, so you're basically on your own once you're in the cage.

2. First player who accidentally hurts or (kill) the felines in anyway while being on the cage are disqualified immediately making the other competitor pass to the next round.

Being so damn fucking grateful he didn't bring Mr kitty to this whole thing after all was an understatement.

3. No sex inside the cage (one boner and you're out).

Now that was a rule he wondered why was needed to be added, but Hershey had told him it was because sometimes the tension between the two competitors will turn them up and makeout mid-battle.

This is why Jackson also told him he wasn't gonna let him compete as a player, he wasn't risking his boyfriend on 'falling' for some other dude. Kinda toxic, but he kinda like the possessive attitude.

4. Each meow counts as a double point, so you're current points would be sum together (the cat must be your feline for it to add up).

5. Each round is about 15 minutes (if dragged).

6. They're only 6 rounds per fight.

7. If referee catches you purposely making your feline meow you're disqualified and would be punished being excluded for the next year's competition.

8. Every aim on the gut, calves and armpit is 15 points (must be with a fist punch/ grab or finger thruster it would not count otherwise).

9. Bruises are also counted (1 point), in other cases: any teeth yanked off counts as 4.

Eyes (not preferable) 3 points.

Fingers (please don't) 6 points.

And any limbs (again, mayor Paul Theo won't pay for your hospital bills. Cautious.) 10 points.

10. You must sign the term and conditions agreeing you're aware of all the dangers you're putting yourself in and would not ask for legal action if you're severely injured (don't be a pussy), before festival date. The signature is obligatory or you will not be allowed to participate.

11. Once sixth round is over you must have atleast over 120 points gather up for the win. If both competitors have over that limited amount the competitor who has the highest count is declared winner.

However, if both competitors haven't pass the limit, they're both disqualified and will be called: tied losers until next year. (No one likes a tie you damn finger teaser).

In worse cases, a deceased competitor mid play would immediately disqualify you. If the competitor passes away after the ending round however, is automatic victory.

Eleven being the last rule, made him winced a little worrisome. This wasn't like the cow chase tournament they had in south park. This was beyond that.

What he did point out is that north parkers are VERY and when he says VERY, like goddamn! they're competitive. They don't like losing.

He bit his lip nervously as he was gesture to take a high up seat, sitting while seeing the crowd of people fill up empty seats.

Judge main attribute is to watch and declare winners, also having to count individually each players points, added his own judgment by rating each cat outfit which is important for the final counting.

He had the power to make a competitor lose if he felt like not giving a high score to their cat. Just like the power to make someone win even with a lower point count, he has unlimited points to give. And if he really dislikes the outfit he can take away max 15 points from a competitor.

So yeah, that was pretty sweet.

'You're already feeling yourself aren't you, fatass?'

"just a little... but could you blame me? Everyone is totally boned by the thought of overpowering someone, and I just have the opportunity to overpower anyone."

'That's more like it.. but don't over do it, lardass.'

"Jesus, can you give me a break already?"

'Not until you're back in South park; your real home with your real friends. We're I can keep an eye on you up closer.'

He rolled his eyes not bothering in answering back, spotting Jackson with the gang seating in some seats. Jackson spotted him right away and blew him a kiss. Which he subconsciously grabbed and blew another one back.

'God, you're so gay.'

The tournament began and everyone was riled up, it was a total massacre in and out of the cage, he was lucky being at top of it all. Seeing how aggressive the crowd of viewers were, he even notice his friends joined in the bashing. Unlike the competitors the audience could and can throw shit in, some tried aiming their gun to the competitor they hated the most others just shaked the cage in a rabid manner and some threw rocks with poor aiming.

It was quite a sight, a whole different display than what he was given firstly of the town.

"Wow," he said in an 'awe' admiring the chaos.

'Please, this would never get at a South park level'.

"C'mon, you can't tell me this isn't skewl?"

'Not even the slightest.'

"You're just saying that cause you're jealous."

'Sure~ being jealous over some people attempting to kill each other in a cage is so– exciting. If I wanted to watch that shit I could just see MMA for women on tv.'

"Okay you snarky jew, I get it, fuck. Nothing pleases you."

'I'm just stating facts, nothing beats south park.'

He grunted, reluctantly watching the whole tournament unfold, and eventually get to its end.

He was almost thrown a bucket of literal shit on because for the people's eyes his judgment wasn't going their way, not pleased by his choices. For his luck he had Jackson by his side during his performance, preventing any damages his way. Which he thought it was very warming and protective of him.

"You should give Eon a 10 pointer it'll definitely hit the rail for Jennebie," Jackson whispered in his ear, he could feel his malicious smirk against it.

So he followed through and did just that.

"Also hit Merry with a 5 pointer and let Harry have it with a 3," he continued almost in a sultry manner.

He looked his way, and sure enough it seem Jackson was turned on by pissing people off; he had dilated pupils and he was bitting his lip, moving back and forth frantically.

'He's literally manipulating you under your damn nose aren't you gonna do anything about it?'

He denied with his head not listening to Kyle and continued following his boyfriend instructions. It's not like he's whipped but he didn't mind pleasing him in some way.

He felt Jackson's hands slid next to his arms rubbing them lightly as he rested his head on his shoulder, sighing.

"Eric did I tell you how hot you look today?" He mustered nuzzling his nose against his neck warmly, "you drive me crazy."

He felt himself melt into Jackson's words, smiling dumbly as he saw how the competitors reacted by their scoring, feeling soothe by his touch and soft hair against his cheek.

He hummed as an answer, dazzlingly eyeing the crowd infront of him not caring much of the insults being sent his way.

"Mom, do you think I'm ready to have sex?" He asked his mother, now being back home.

His mom looked his way from the small kitchen practically part of the living room.

She moved her mouth as she was trying to articulate some words, seemingly startled, "uhhm.. well, I'm not sure poopsikins, do you feel ready?"

"I'm not sure either, but all my friends have done it," he shrugged not seemingly sure himself, "when was your first time?"

"Oof.." she exclaimed almost incredulous of how far that was, pouting her lips in thought, "probably when I was your age now that I think about."

"Wow. So does that mean I'm already late?"

"Ofcourse not sweetums," she chuckled, while smiling, "it's takes the right person at the right time."

"Did you do it with the right person, ma?" He asked genuinely curious.

"I did it with the coach of our volleyball team."

"Aye! That doesn't seem very ethical at all!"

"Technically I was learning something new, hon," she tried justifying herself with a light nervous tone to it, "anyways– why do you ask? Is that boyfriend of yours already wanting to escalate towards higher grounds?"

"Well.. not exactly, but it seemed like it!" He admitted, almost exasperated by the whole previous ordeal, "he seemed like he wanted something, he just.. didn't have the balls to tell me.

Even though it was obvious he was trying to hide it from me and he was all touchy too."

"Hmmm.." she looked at the ceiling, thinking carefully, "well it does seems quite suspicious, but you shouldn't get to that type of conclusions yet."

"Why?"

"Because then he'll think you're desperate."

"Really!?" He exclaimed almost nervously, eyes widen by the possibility.

He went to his room after eating dinner and briefly remembering the underwear gnome he and Stan hid in a cooler from a previous episode of theirs while he made an extra sandwich cause he was starving to death and the diet he had set himself off with wasn't it for him. Worrisome of looking like a desperate horny dog to Jackson, that was far what he wanted to give.

He layyed down sighing exhausted, remembering the passionate kisses Jackson gave him before entering his building, backing him against a wall and making out for a couple of minutes before reluctantly drifting ways.

He bit his lip just thinking the possibility of Jackson wanting more than just kisses, gulping nervously as he lightly yanked the collar of his shirt feeling a immense tightness around his neck, sucking in some air.

He took out his phone and texted Butters about his other worry that has also been eating him alive all day. The previous event made him realize how much he missed his little feline friend.

Butters (+1 ***-***-****) 📞

[Inbox✉]

'Butters, make sure Mr. Kitty is well fed or I'll hunt you down and chop you into bits you hear me!'

'No need to worry about it, Eric👌🏼

I'm already making sure your furr baby is alright'

'Please don't call it a furr baby, dude. That's gay as fuck'

'Butters?' He reluctantly added.

'Yeah?'

'If I we're to never come back.. would you miss me?'

'Why golly, Eric. Ofcourse I will, we're best pals!'

'I fell like you're bullshittin me rn just to make me feel better'

'Are you feeling under the weather again?'

He pinch himself, Butters could right outta the bat tell when somethings bothering him even through text.

'Maybe..'

'Do you know if any of the guys have been.. not that I care or anything! But, do they seem to miss me or something?'

'Typing..'

Butters kept writing but it seemed he stopped a couple of times before continuing writing again as if he was contemplating his reply and erasing it back and forth.

Finally after like a minute, he sent a bible looking message.

'This is what I've seen so FAR, it's not accurate so please don't take it as seriously, alright?:)

I've seen Stan and Kyle being the ones least affected by your absence, ofcourse that was just the first few days.

Stan seems to be taking it all pretty lightly but I do see him getting bored easily and shoving his face in junk food all day (probably not you related) but still, it's kinda unlike him yk.

Kyle on the other hand.. well, yk how pissy he gets. It's kinda hard to tell what's in his mind when all he shows is anger. But he does seem to be in denial of you actually staying in north park for too long, he thinks you're scheming something (Which isn't entirely untrue but he doesn't know that) and you already knew that.

Kenny, I already told you. He wasn't taking it well, but he's gotten better since your last call.

And well, to summarize it all, it does seem to put affect in some way for them. So I do think they miss you, Eric.

You guys don't really have the best way in showing it'

'That's useless dunk garbage, I could've guess that myself, dumbass.

But thanks.. I guess'

'Anytime n.n'

'Eric.'

'What?'

'What the hell is dunk garbage suppose to mean?'

He sighed, placing his phone in his lamp stand, covering himself in his covers.

'Are you finally gonna admit you're homesick, dickface?'

"Fuck you, I am not," huffing annoyed, he tossed himself to his other side, "I just miss Mr kitty that's all."

'Mhm, sure, Cartman'

"Tee hee~ tee hee hee~" he heard from the end of his bed, he snapped back up in shock, glancing at that little well familiar devil.

'Oh great'

"The fuck!? I thought I had got rid of you already!"

"Tee hee~ is this how you welcome your little bundle of joy after years of not seeing each other?"

"Fuck you, dude! I don't want nothing to do with you anymore. I'm not a little kid anymore, this is totally lame now," he hissed hiding half his face under the covers, feeling frustratingly embarrassed, "so uncool.."

"So you rather replace me for a gay inner monologue of your gay little friend?" Cupid sneered, approaching him.

'Fuck you, asshole!'

"Up yours, Kyle!" The little creature snap back almost bitterly, now changing his tone to a sweeter one, "Eric we use to be the best of friends! Setting people up with their true love it was so much fun!"

"Yeah, but acting like cupid is a 2016 thing, get over it already. It's sooo totally lame."

Cupid me sighed in disbelief and disapproval, "preteens I swear~" he rolled his eyes annoyed before continuing, "look, Eric. I'm here not exactly to set anyone up.

I'm here to make you realize the real you tee hee~"

"The real me?"

"Uhuh," he nodded beaming wide, "you're so in denial of your true feelings I'm starting to feel pity over you~" he swirled around in circles playfully.

"Aye!"

"But don't worry! That's why I'm here! To open your eyes~"

"To what?"

"Being in love with Jackson ofcourse! Tee hee hee~!"

"WHAT!? NUH-UH! you're bullshittin me right now! I don't like Jackson, I just think he's neat and cool!"

"That's being a complete gayway, cupcake~"

'I must admit just this once that the ugly goblin has a point'

He heard cupid me huffed by the name, but he couldn't give a rats ass about it, "Shut the fuck up, Kahal! And shut the fuck up cupid me! I DO NOT like Jackson!"

"Yes you do~"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Yuh-huh~"

"NO!" Panic began rising in him, shoving harshly the little creature to the wall running inside his closet with his hands covering his ears closing the door with a loud slam.

'Sweet, can you do that again?' He heard Kyle say referring about how he had shoved cupid me in a furious attempt to get him away.

He ignored him once more, squinting his eyes shut dismissively shaking his head frantically. Hearing cupid me rise above with angry noises and the flapping of his wings echoing the room in a loud attempt to threatened him.

"That does it, Eric," Cupid me spoke tirelessly behind the door, his sweet tone long gone replacing for a more menacingly one, "I've been very nice and have forgiven you countless times of how you've mistreated me!

Now come out of the closet right now, were gonna speak like real men!" He slammed harshly the door attempting to turn the handle but his little hands couldn't grasp it entirely making it almost impossible.

"No! Leave me alone!"

'C'mon cupid me, leave him alone already. You can't force it either' he heard Kyle try to reason with it in his defense, but Cupid me was way stubborn to let things slide easily.

"Shut up, Kyle, I don't want to hear anymore of those gay little speeches of yours! This is between me and him," Cupid me kept on slamming the door, even trying to budge in with his body, "come outta the closet right now, Eric!

You can't hide yourself in there forever."

"Just you watch!" He cried out, feeling tears fall down his cheeks, sucking harshly some air. He's never felt this scared in his life, feeling how small and suffocating the small space being, sobbing and holding himself for dear life as he hugged his legs hiding his face.

There was a immediate silence, he wanted to take a peek and make sure cupid me was long gone, but he stopped before placing his hand on the door.

'Don't be stupid. He could be acting like he isn't there to make you come out, he isn't called a creepy little shit for no reason'

He nodded, gulping nervously, as Kyle was indeed right. Cupid me wasn't to be mess with, he was calculated, cunning and coldly accurate, he knew his ways to get him, and he hated having let that little shit capable of making him feel this vulnerable.

He rocked himself back and forth in attempt to calm his nerves, but it didn't help in the slightest.

'Breathe, asswipe, you don't want to pass out either'

He squinted his eyes even harder, sucking in some air and letting it out, in and out.

'1–

Breathe in, exhale..

2-

Breathe in, exhale..

3– '

His breathing began to take a slower pace, Kyle's voice soothed him like no other but he was immediately tense back up by the sounds of a chainsaw.

Oh god, no.

He trembled trying to back further away but there was no more end to it. He looked fearsome at the door being torn apart and a crazy cupid me smirking menacingly poke inside.

"Oh, Eric~ come out from the closet, dear~" he sang, finally demolishing the door to it's entirety.

Cupid me gripped him from his shirt yanking him out and with a loud thump he shoved him to the floor, he whimpered trying to reach his bed and try shielding himself under it but Cupid me dragged him by the legs. Sobbing uncontrollably he was left no choice but to look into his eyes.

"Eric, I'm not trying to hurt you.. but you have to listen to me. You're in love with Jackson."

And with that, cupid me pointed a arrow at him, "this is for your own good, be happy and be as gay as you can possibly be tee hee~!" Finally releasing the arrow and knocking him out dead with a hit.

°°°°

He gasped wide awake, looking at his sweaty hands and seemingly back in bed. He looked around and cupid me was no longer in sight.

'Morning gay bitch'

Just Kyle, but that wasn't anything new for him.

He sighed feeling slightly better, "Morning.."

'Sleep well, fatass?'

"Slept like ass, but I do feel slightly better," and with that, he got out of bed and went to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

He had noticed it seemed to be quite earlier than usual his mother was still in bed, so he quietly walked passed her room to not disturb her.

Since when has that ever matter to him?

He made himself breakfast not bothering on waking up his mother, and soon after headed outside to meet up with his friends. They had agreed on hanging out for today at the skaters park.

Waving hello as he saw both Hershey and Stewart already sitting in some stairs waiting for the remaining members.

"Morning!"

"What's got you all smile and rainbows?" Stewart asked with a smile, arching a brow confused.

"Nothing, I just feel good you know," he shrugged, sitting in the spot next to him.

"You did a great job as judge, dog park," Hershey added, now sitting with his legs cross infront of them, mindlessly sliding his board from side to side.

"Thanks."

After a few minutes of chit chatting Jackson had finally arrived, eyes widen in surprise as he notice him, planting a kiss right away on his lips.

"Morning, baby nuts. Didn't think you'd be here this early," he gave a hand five to Stewart and a peace sign to Hershey before sitting down, "normally you're the last to arrive."

"I thought you'd be happier to see me~" he teased with a smirk.

"I'm always happy to see you."

His heart skipped a few beat smiling wide and his face felt heated.

"Damn, motherfuckers. Get a room," Stewart added with not much malice into it, taking out a small bag from his pocket of his baggy ass black pants.

"What the fuck is that?" He asked, curiously eyeing what it seems to be a couple of joints.

"Never tried a joint before, fatboy?"

He denied, he thought those shit were for pussies; poor people like Kenny and hippies, definitely for hippies. Goddamn how he hated hippies.

"Damn why didn't you say so!" He exclaimed baffled, his other two friends also looked distraught his way, "here," he passed him a joint but he hesitantly look at it.

There wasn't anything relatively good in those things, he's only gotten bad experiences just being near them. Being his mother a crackhead herself or seeing Kenny get himself high with paint for substituting it; even if he had countless times told him he should just stick with the joints instead of huffing paint like some crazy junkie. He also witnessed dumb highschoolers making themselves look like cringe looking fools being all high and shit promising himself he'll never be like them.

"What? Scared?" Stewart asked, taunting moving the joint in hand with a sly smirk.

And Jackson eyed him with a intense look, interest peeking his way.

'Don't do it, asshole'

He snatched that joint quicker than dashing off in a hurry when he hear the microwave announce with a beep that his hotpocket was ready.

Huffing a deep bunch, coughing loudly as it hit his throat awfully while his friends laughed by the first attempt.

"Killer.." he mustered out, feeling how the substance was already hitting him bad.

He was starting to feel a lot lighter since, also losing appetite and replacing his food with joints. Luckily his mother seem to not mind it much, as she view it being a phase of his now that's he's hitting adolescent anytime soon.

He layyed down, puffing some more of the weed given, turning on the tv lazily.

He laughed incredulous at the big companies that claim being precautious of the environment and safety of the children.

And he bashed on people who show any ounce of hatred towards animals.

Who do they think they are? This world is supposed to be freedom, we're all animals living in the same globe managed and ruled by arrogant men who play god.

Who can say who's to command the world? Just cause they speak and are highly intelligent than most animals there.

Someone should do something about it, go against this corrupted government and protest for the right of change and liberty.

He huffed another hit, before resting deeply his head against a cushion and doing absolutely nothing about it taking out his phone and putting on so music to avoid any mindless thinking.

His eyes widen in realization, "MOOOOOOOM," he screamed out loud in a scare.

°°°°

"Ah, I see," the doctor hummed, as he eyed his eyes with a small flashlight, "you're developing pussie-itis." He concluded.

"Oh my," he heard his mother gasped in surprise.

"What's that?" He asked confused.

"It only occurs to outsiders," he explained, placing back his flashlight in his coat, "it's a condition that could lead to severe head trauma being cause by being homesick or being expose for too long on a diffrent environment far different from your previous living."

"Nuh-uh! I'm not home sick!"

"This is serious, you could turn into a giant pussy."

He gasped by the revelation, covering his mouth.

"Is there any way to prevent that happening, doctor?," his mother asked concerning.

"Well, I could prescribe some medicine. But that still can't guarantee some changes in your son, Ms Cartman."

Being prescribe meds was super lame, but he had no choice into taking them.

However after a few days he got tired and decided to skip a few times and lastly shoving the pills inside a drawer completely forgetting about them as he venture with his friends doing whatever crappy shit hit their way.

Prev —

[bonesandthebees]

okay so like i was gonna just start on this tonight and get the general ideas down and finish this when i was Awake and Functioning but then i started rambling so uhhh jazz handss

take me describing the diff energies ur fics give off, i am sorry if this is uncomprehensible fjwaewf (is that even a word?? incomprehensible? ye-)

through a glass divine: DEFFFF rainy day vibes, the au feels very Elegant to me even though glass!wilbur himself is very much not, when I read glass I get the same vibes as being in a car /pos, it's comforting but can get intense at times, sometimes with no warning. like one minute your head is against the glass (heh, pun unintended lol), and ur looking out at the streetlamps, the next the breaks are SLAMMED and u get whacked against the seatbelt lmfaoooo (this is all /pos !! i love the angst lol)

world forgetting: FOGGG, that's the first thought that pops into my head, things are unclear first and it's a little eerie but there's also something comforting about it (i will use this word a lot bc . well ur writing is comforting hehehe), the first half of wf was very exciting, it reminded me of when i used to have my mcu marathons, edge of my seat, shoving popcorn into my face, and just glee, the first few chapters with wf especially with the combat made me so fucking giddy lmfaooo i had so much fun reading it, the second half was a lot more calm and melancholy, it was defff sitting on the couch while it rains outside vibes, like MM the hurt comfort?? give me a blanket and a pillow to squeeze bc hot damnn

stars and their children: stars man . hooweeee, this fic was binging a 12 season show vibes, you invest a lot into it and wow the emotional damage?? for real. this fic was late night rants at sleepovers, theorizing n coming up with silly conspiracy theories (i think this was when i really started reading the asks, so for me it has a lot of those vibes tied to it), when i read stars… i feel a lot of Awe. it feels big, it feels important, it also feels like im reading a very fancy novel from a very big library, like i feel like i've stepped into a massive multi-tiered library and plucked my favourite book from its shelf, i can imagine the hardcover being absolutely gorgeous, it gives me the same vibes as getting assigned a book to read in class and having your mind blown /pos from it, like "damn i understand why they make us read this bc wow"

(fun fact i have ur ao3 page bookmarked on my toolbar lmaoooo)

honey and tangerines: well . this one just gives me island and coastal vibes lolll u described them very well, but okay from a reading perspective? besides indie movie lmao. i'd say… hanging out with a friend you haven't seen in a while. it's familiar, it's bittersweet, it's thrilling. honey and tangerines gives me the vibes of doing something youve been wanting to for awhile but were always too scared to. pushing your boundaries. it's all those classic "finally living life vibes", staying out till 3 am, finally getting around to decorating your room, going on a roadtrip. when i read honey and tangerines, it feels like i'm experiencing life. all the prev fics either feel like novels or movies, but hats feels like life

what the water gave me: ngl when i read this i just feel such pure emotion that i cry like idek how to explain it man. it's so all encompassing /pos it does give me staying up late in my room with fairy lights vibes though, dunno why. just gives off that same warm energy

A DUSTY TOMB OMGGOJEAWE i need to reread that anyways

a dusty tomb: straight off the bat, playing dnd. dnd is so much fun and i have so many happy memories from it and a dusty tomb defff gives off those vibes, chaos, freeing, family. it also gives off the vibe of finding a piece of old writing in a buried notebook and reading it and going "wtf?? when did i write this this is amazing" maybe that's just bc it feels like u read my mind writing it lmao it's perfect i adore it so much and i have reread it an unholy amount of times, i just get the vibes of sitting criss cross on the floor and reading it, it's not necessarily a comfy position but it's enjoyable nonetheless, just a happy moment for oneself, it feels like giving yourself a treat, self care, all of that good stufff

no time confounds me: def feels like watching a tv show /pos, it def feels like smth i'd put on w my stepmom or my birth mom and just absolutely fucking Vibe to it bro, that fic is suchhh a vibe, i'd sink into my couch and get HOOKED, it also ofc brings w it all the vibes of just where i live LMAO, and the motorcycling reminds me of my dad <333 i miss motorcycling with him dawggg it's so much fun, but yeahhh. all the vibes described in the fic just make me want to go out for a hike in a forest lmao, i love it. also hot chocolate. this fic is defff drinking hot chocolate vibes

nocturnal animals: ooohh this one is defff late night vibes, working late on hw and looking out ur window and just taking a moment to appreciate the stars n stuff, also windy day vibes, this def feels like a novel my friend would shove at me to read and i'd be like "brooo i dont even LIKE vampires" and theyd be like "no bro just trust me" and then i'd be really bored one day so i'd pick it up and then get addicted . and then in this hypothetical series that has like a billion books i'd go to the library and borrow them all and binge them in a week lmfao, i love this fic sm ngl, i would proudly display this fic on my bookshelf (well i mean, i would literally display all of ur fics on my bookshelf KING i would have a shelf dedicated to ur fics 100%)

okay… i think those are all the main fics, there're a couple more that i've read but i am . getting really really reallyyy tired and idek if any of this is comphrensible lmfaooo 😭 😭 😭

i hope u enjoyed bee <333 tldr: i love ur writing and i have core memories attached to all of these fics and they are all special to me in their own way <33

ohhhh these are so cool to read icy (sorry it took me so long to respond I've been so busy lately)

lmao love all the drama in glass being compared to a car braking super suddenly. rainy car drives is definitely not the vibe I think it has in my head but that's super sweet to imagine :)

comparing stars to a Big Fancy Book makes me so happy thank you so much. I have this absolutely gorgeous fancy version of Dune with a stunning cover and I always imagine something kind of similar as the 'cover' for stars in my head so i love that you imagine that too

in contrast you and i feel the exact same about honey and tangerines. it's definitely that kind of bittersweet reconciling friendship vibe. saying it feels like life means so much thank you <33 thats exactly what I was going for

to me what the water gave me feels like swimming in a warm tropical ocean at night which might be a bit on the nose but yeah that's what I think of. but fairy lights in a room sounds so nice I love that

awww I love that idea for dusty tomb. just rereading something nostalgic and wonderful and feeling so comforted by it. that makes me smile a lot to imagine :)

hot chocolate and watching a tv show YEAHHHH you get it that's exactly what i was going for from no time confounds me. also that's so funny that you mention motorcycling with your dad bc that's where my descriptions of riding motorcycles comes from. my dad always used to pick me up from school on his motorcycle when I was a little kid, it was so much fun

oooo windy day for nocturnal animals is interesting but I love it. also god you saying it feels like a series with dozens of books reminds me of this vampire series i read in middle school that had like 10 books it's absolutely nothing like nocturnal animals but now I'm having a nostalgia trip thinking about it lol

thank you icy this was so sweet to read :)

[distantpagesandpapercuts]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN

NAME?: Leah

PRONOUNS?: She/Her (They is also accepted)

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION?: Discord is easiest for me cause I can get the notifications on my phone. (It makes noise so I like HAVE to check it.) Whereas there's days or even weeks I don't check Tumblr. SO- discord is best.)

MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?: I only have two. Cicero is usually the most active because he gets more interaction. But I like writing on both and do so as often as my depression addled brain will let me.

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: Uhhh.... Well, over ten. Maybe... 13 years? 14 Maybe?

BEST EXPERIENCE?: I've made friends and lost friends and seen comebacks and such. But really I just enjoy consuming your guys' stuff. I read your stuff and alot of you do arts in some way or another about things I like so really it's good for me all around even if I'm not interacting with you at the time. I really do enjoy writing stories with you guys though. I wouldn't say I have one single best experience though. (Such a cop out answer I know)

RP PET PEEVES?: I dunno man. Maybe like... people who take themselves and writing silly little mind thoughts too seriously? I do this for fun, yannow? Its not my life. Idk something like that. It's not like I don't like people who are serious about their writing, it's more like having unrealistic expectations and standards pushed on me to fit into your narrative that I didn't ask for. (Or rather, pushing my MUSES into narratives that I didn't ask for. Like.... in a bullying sense. If that makes sense?)

I've been bullied and shamed and lied to in rp communities before. And I'm just like... over that kind of stuff. I just come here to write my little stories with my little online friends and that's as much as it is gonna be. Yannow?

FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT?: I love more serious things like angst. But I also like a bit of soft too. I like writing smut, but sometimes it takes me awhile to work up to it because like.... I don't wanna embarrass myself? lmao

PLOTS OR MEMES?: I like both! Memes are easier to just wash your hands of. But also they're great starters and ways to get to know each other more often than not! I'm honestly terrible at plotting cause I'm such a people pleaser. But- I'm more than happy to talk things out with others and see where it goes.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?: Both are fine I have no preference. Although I must say I have a tendency to ramble and multi-para even without meaning to. Cicero's got a lot going on in his head specifically and if I don't write it all out I feel like you're missing out on the experience, ya dig? So like... I LIKE writing both. But do I typically write one liners? Absolutely not.

TIME TO WRITE?: Really late at night or early in the morning. (Every so often the afternoon but that's usually when I'm napping. My sleep schedule is shitty cause of my job.)

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?: There's some of me in both Cicero and Kira in different ways. They've also defs evolved over the years. Straying from what I intended and such. But I'm not displeased about it. I wouldn't say either are self insert-y though. Cicero is way more confident than I am and Kira is much more hardworking than I am ha ha.

Tagged by: @archerwhiterp

Tagging: Whoever would like to! :)

[quinloki]

nah please feel free to answer pubically if you want I'm mostly embarassed bc WHY AM I THINKING THESE THOUGHTS AT WORK also I'm trying to get over my weird adversion to being percieved

(they just like super automated my job in a way that it requires zero brain power and my mind has been wandering very badly soooooo)

okay but like…. lil saucy…

my brain didn't go into super detail and I'm also terrible at translating my thoughts to text BUT

Marco does some kind of favor for Sabo prolly not anything deep just something work related or something and so Sabo wants to get him a little present as thanks but it's sabo and that little present is reader all tied up in marco's bed wrapped in a bow like a present prolly blindfolded or at least gagged so they don't make toooo much noise for anyone else to come investigate (maybe with a toy idk my brain is blue-screening the more I think of this)

and he texts marco like I left a present in your bed as thanks dear brother and marco is like uh and finds it and calls sabo up and is like wow how thoughtful don't you wanna come watch me unwrap it

and ahhh my brain is bluescreening again but I wanted to share

I think I've calmed down a little, this is the first time in awhile that brainrot has hit me this bad I won't lie xD thank you for feeding it and letting me ramble at you <3333

Oh, oh man, look I have someone for you to follow on Twitter if you have it, and if you don't, you still need to see This Set Up.

Familiar is also a Wonderful Comic just all on it's own. Right up there with Sunstone for a solid look at healthy bdsm relationships.

But! Back to the uh, task at hand - I love the idea of this, and especially as a variant (or homage) to the aforementioned set up. I love the idea that this is a point in the relationship where they're all together and still in a house just TEEMING with other people.

Sabo's got the reader all secured and just whispers in her ear that the quieter she can stay, the less likely someone like Ace or Thatch is to accidentally walk in on her. Right before he turns one - or all - of the toys on.

The restraint on his part too, watching her squirm and whimper and leaving her untouched for Marco. Once he gets the text from Marco though, it's a new land speed record as he covers whatever distance is between him and them at that point. Taking two seconds to compose himself before he walks into the room.

There's a little sign on the bedroom door, something about entering without permission on pain of death, and Sabo's not going to tell you that the sign's there. Only reminding you that the door's unlocked and the house is occupied (it is dead-ass empty), as he and Marco have you nearly screaming with pleasure.

You're so exhausted and spent by the end of it that even the next day they're trading off bringing you meals, and catering to your every whim. You try to feign irritation at it, quietly delighting about being pampered, but if they didn't know from the beginning, you're all aware of how you really feel by the end of it.

You're not little bird or dove or anything that day, they spend the day calling you things like princess, lady, queen, etc. XD (Ace is like "did you save them from accidental tax fraud or something?")

[iterum-poesis]

Hello ! I have a question if you don't mind me asking. How did you figure out you were a shifter? -☘️

Hello there!

I don't mind answering at all, thanks for sending in your question! It was kind of a slow process for me. It kinda sounds cliche, but I think I was always a little different from other people whether I realized it or not. I preferred the company of animals, I had a big affinity for nature, I acted really weird around water (took baths so long I started turning purple as a kid). Most can be chalked up to me having autism, but then I started getting physical results that actually made me consider if I was something other than just a therian (or, theriomythic in my case).

I experience many things that are included in regular therianthropy, including mental Shifts and phantom shifts. So, that's all I thought it was for awhile. However, in early High School, a friend introduced me to the supernatural community through a pack known as 'Dirges'. I will admit, we were both originally only in there as a form of entertainment. My friend laughed at those that called themselves werewolves. However, being in there sparked something in me. I began to ask myself "is it actually possible?"

The more I heard about their experiences, the more I related to them. And so, I began to try to physically shift with the Mental-> Phantom-> Physical method. *And I got results.* I never fully shifted, but something happened almost every time I attempted. It varied a bit, but in general I at least got heightened senses that I wasn't experiencing with regular meditation. I would also get muscle pains, soreness, spasms, redness, numbness, inability to move my extremities, etc. These things only occured while I was trying to shift (or during particularly strong phantom/mental shifts) unless something else happened to cause it like when I pulled my hamstring. I also went to the er a few times and no nurse or doctor found anything wrong so I could cross off it being medical in nature. The issues also stopped for awhile, when I stopped trying to shift as I was focusing on other things. They have recently started back up - only after I started practicing again.

The thing that really drove me over the edge of "this is supernatural, not some medical issue no one knows of yet" was when my dad actually confessed to me that he at least used to believe he was a mythical creature as well. Even recently when I mentioned it he just went "well, I do have good reason to believe it" (although he didn't say exactly what those reasons were, I've seen him do some real strange things before like controlling wasps just by talking to em). The main thing I think I am is a dragon, and I also realized that even though I've only recently become outwardly interested in draconic things, my dad has been getting me a lot of dragon themed things since I was a toddler. Even when I had birds or merfolk as a hyper fixation, he'd get me dragon stuff. I'm pretty sure he knows something I don't lol. Doesn't help that his dad is actually an orphan, so we can't really trace our roots on that side. His side of the family also just has a lot of supernatural stuff going on in general though.

◇─◇──◇────────────◇──◇─◇

I hope that answered your question alright! Sorry I tend to ramble a bit (like I mentioned, I'm autistic and I don't always really know what I should include). If you have any other questions feel free to ask!

[toribookworm22]

Hello hello, awhile back you offered up an ask for me to ramble on about anything I could. I want to extend the same to you now! Tell us about anything on your mind, any new progress in a WIP, a new hyperfixation, maybe you made something really tasty recently and want to share the experience. Let this be the canvas to word vomit!

Haha!

I finally have thoughts occurring in my mind!

No, but seriously. Thank you so much for this ask, darling. I really really appreciate it, even if it took me way to long to answer. 🙃

Onto the ramble!

I am currently in three writing classes for school, so most of my writing time is dedicated to assignments for those classes. I have been writing a bit of poetry-- mostly angry, if I'm being honest-- which has been nice as well. I'm about to start working on a TV drama pilot for a class and I'm SURE you'll get to hear all about my woes on that one. Should be fun though.

And continuing on, let me discuss the thing today that drove me to finally answer this ask. (Accidentally got long so...)

I recently got an idea for a polyam story and accidentally wrote a really cute section of the story that I subsequently decided to turn in as a short story for one of my classes.

Well, today I got in-class critiques. And I was starkly reminded how little people know about aromanticism and all it entails. The critiques went really well. Even the people who didn't quite understand really liked my writing and several people had well-deserved concerns that I will be taking into consideration when I decide to write more.

But my professor (probably 60 year old man) admitted aromantic was a term he had to look up. Then he proceeded to steer the class into a discussion of how I handled the characters' identities in the story.

That felt a little insensitive to me, but-- I wasn’t allowed to speak for one-- I wasn't going to jump to negative conclusions. People brought up that the story should incorporate clearer discussions sooner (correct) and that this was a new subject matter to them (also correct) and then the professor interjected that he didn't think it was good to label the characters. One step worse, he then added the word "diagnosis."

Even if I had been allowed to speak, I was speechless. I haven't discussed aromanticism with an adult since I came out to my parents. And I go to a very inclusive school, so most of the students are careful with their language on matters like these.

Several students in my class did argue his point. Turns out there's at least two other aro-spec people in my class and several other allies. But it was too late for my professor not to have lost a little bit of my respect.

I knew submitting this story was a risk. I knew there would be people who didn't understand.

Had I omitted their labels, suddenly my sweet and loving story is about a toxic relationship with no love and bad people. Right? Cause I guess that is what we look like to the outside world. That's not even bringing up the QPR or the polyam aspects.

A few years ago, I finally reached the point where I can take critique on my writing because I finally started believing in my own writing. I'm a good writer. I write good stories.

This piece is nothing different.

But I wasn't quite prepared for the reminder that not everyone is going to understand what I'm writing about. And it'll have nothing to do with whether they like it or not. They just won't understand.

Sorry, that ended up taking a very long and kinda dark turn. 🤣

Thank you again for the ask and giving me a platform to rant on (like I need another 🙃).

All my love,

~ toribookworm ❤️