#I'm not mad at her I'm just baffled at why the fuck humans are like this

[eyrieofsynapses]

kept finding our thermostat set to fucking 66°F, resetting it to 70° because what the fuck it's 20° outside, and then... found it set to 65°

this has been going on for like three weeks so finally decided to text housemate group chat and be like "hey so can we figure out a temperature that we can all agree on"

me and third housemate: prefer 70°-72°F and have been setting the thermostat as such

second housemate: is the one setting it to 66°F and, whenever it's set higher, is apparently opening her room windows in 20° weather because 70° is too warm and has not mentioned this to us, somehow

me and third housemate: ...okay we can deal with 68°

me, today, in my room, hands Absolutely Fucking Freezing, shivering, desperately wanting just one more degree of heat: ...maybe I should have let the thermostat wars continue to rage

anyway. evolution why the fuck did you make humans Like This

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 8/6/2024

people mad at a video game for being woke, i'm mad at it for not being woke enough. so it goes.

also i wrote a yeehawgust fic

listening

another addition to the "SOMEBODY COME FUCK THIS (GAY)" playlist, thank u charli xcx and billie eilish

-

reading

im still really annoyed with Retraction Watch for platforming a terf last year and then not doing any sort of sockpuppet damage control in the comments. since they got acquired by crossref they've done way less guest editorials. not to be all "stick to sports!" but stick to sports, retraction watch.

they did introduce me to this substack series i will be following with great interest about the rise and fall of hindawi. wiley acquired a paper mill a few years back, bc they seemingly did zero diligence, and then blithely ignored the problem for two years before being forced to do the single largest retraction of papers in scientific publishing history, somewhere above ten thousand articles because it is STILL ONGOING.

i do love following various retractions bc i like seeing what finally made someone go "wait a minute", and, as i have just written in a cover letter, "I studied astronomy and have held several data jobs because I’m fascinated with how and why systems work and fail..."

-

watching

my best friend has decided while i'm at her home in the evenings eating her food and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i am fed tiny bits of mushed up banana by hand by her one-year-old), our new project is watching all the xmen movies. i have no particular desire to do this or special affinity for the xmen, and i would like to keep eating very good texmex and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i play hot wheels with the five-year-old). this sounds so super bitchy of me but it's hard to convey that these are essentially on for background noise.

saw the first two. the two things i know about them are that hugh jackman is in them and they're at the statue of liberty in one

-

playing

an ideologically baffling little environmental game free in the epic store this week, LumberJack. this is on PC and Switch for $13, which is far more money than the playtime anyone can get out of this game. tiny tiny tiny little Spain-headquartered studio without an active website, it looks like one guy hired out to make this and two more games and then went back to single-dev projects. i can respect that!

steam reviewers are mad at this game for being woke, and i'm mad at it for being woke in a very strange way. your one mechanic, as a bear, is swinging a big axe to remove cars and trailer offices and portapotties and various garbage from the landscape.

i wish the movement and look controls are inverted, and i wish they weren't, or at least had an option to make them normal. i know Why this isn't a mobile game (can't monetize something with twoish hours of gameplay and twenty levels) but it's a very straightforward and simple game that would translate very well to mobile. much like donut county.

now for being picky about the political mindset of the developers: as much fun as it is to be a bear swinging an axe around, lumberjacks are not the people i associate with wild preservation movements.

saving the land and turning it back into pristine and perfect land for wild animals in this game looks like erasing every hint of human activity from a site and turning it into sheer recreational use. many levels are heavily polluted, but some can definitely be read as recycling centers. im confused by the erasing every hint of humans in early levels, and then this level where you break down a radio station, slap the host with your axe, and she turns into a park ranger who starts gardening and taking care of chickens?

i don't think that removing all the traces of people from the landscape will magically fix everything, nor do i think simply being in unspoiled wilderness will magically fix me.

there's a golfing level where you whack bombs into various small buildings. i think golfing to save the environment is a strange choice to make for designing a game.

i also briefly thought this bird in every level was an extinct ivory-billed woodpecker, which was a little alarming bc there are some real nutjobs out there with very strong beliefs about this bird and government overreach and how much the government is lying to you about the extinctness of various animals.

i stopped playing about halfway through bc i was not having fun and found the underlying environmental message a little confused. they've managed to sell at least 10k units which is...not very good. i am not surprised this is free on epic, and i wonder what their payout for that was. would not be surprised if they negotiated a payment to their nonprofit partner ecologi as part of that.

-

making

yeehawgust fill! i have another bitchy blond babygirl!

what the fuck is the prisoner? cult 60s british spy tv. with all the surreality and anxieties about the cold war and midcentury psychological horror you could possibly want

He’d been drugged enough times to recognize the splitting migraine rapidly galloping down his neurons. “Where am I?” He fought down the taste of bile (ketamine? xylazine, by the aftertaste) and the rising panic. Oddly enough, the migraine was always worse with veterinary sedatives. One would think a mind would adapt to nearly three hundred years of irregular drugging and constant experiments. One’s body had adapted and ghoulified, but in equally unhelpful ways. The tycoon flickered, approximating an appraising blink. “This meeting has been a long time coming, hasn't it? You've come a long ways, literally and, I suspect, figuratively as well. You’re in the Free Economic Zone of New Vegas.” They’d pretended the prisons were so many different places: across the Continent, in various parts of London, up and down and all around the East Coast of these wretched States. Rarely this far west, aside from the awful escapade in the faux pre-War Western town. “What do you want?” He managed to swing his ankles off the saddle (also pre-War? Heavily used. It certainly wasn’t his, the equestrian event had always been his worst event in the pentathalon) and jolted what felt like every half-dead nerve in his half-dead body.

[awellboiledicicle]

Mo the Human is setting some people up for deep confusion, expressly because I'm clearing out my storage bins.

Specifically, I had several gemstones and i didn't want to just sell them bc I knew people like getting their starstone. So I gave one to Chayne, Najuma, Reth and Hassain.

Najuma got all hyped and was like "aw yeah I collect these this is great" and Chayne was just honored they thought to gift him something so rare and valuable.

So when Mo trots up to Reth at 6am and hands him a citrine, they have a certain level of expected reaction. Like they assume at worst he gets awkward about being given a thing. Best case they get a hi five.

They do not expect him to slowly look between the rock in their outstretched palm and their face with a deeply baffled expression before sliding into his chatty and charming persona. He takes it and thanks them, before clearing his throat and scurrying off.

Oh well, maybe he's got stuff to do. Is their assumption as they trot off to go find Hassain.

Cut to Reth around a corner trying to fucking divine what in the goddamn they meant by giving him his starstone, cut and polished, when their interaction level so far as been helping him with illegal things and chatting about cooking when they aren't finding ingredients.... that he specifically asked for. Wait. Were they just being friendly? Was this how they flirt?? Was his banter being taken very seriously and they're doubling down like this because they dont know how majiri do things? They didn't seem nervous he'd reject it, so if it was flirting they felt confident enough that he'd be into it. Or that could point to it literally just meaning they found it and thought of him. Which makes him feel a whole different but related series of things.

He comments about it to Tish next he sees her and she proceeds to fulfill her sibling quota of teasing him. Half because aw and half because "No, they're also fire type. If they were flirting they'd probably just tell you. They just found something nice and wanted to share."

Jump cut to Hassain flatly asking why they're trying to give him his starstone. They raise an eyebrow.

"It's your er star thing, yeah? I found it a while ago, but when I saw it in storage last night i remembered you mentioning it. So i wanted you to have it instead of me just selling it." They shrugged. "If you don't want it--"

"No, I will accept the gift. It is.. very kind of you to offer." He tucks it into a pouch and sizes them up for a second. Amusement flashes over his features just slow enough for them to catch before he shakes his head. "Do humans make a habit of gifting gems to people?"

Well now they felt like he was, in his own way, trying not to laugh at them. Which was an intriguing enough proposition that they set aside the option that they'd just fucked up. Slowly, they tilted their head and leaned sideways to get a better look at his face-- a task made more difficult by his instinctive shifting around to be able to look at their face without actually facing them.

"Yeah? Why?" More leaning as he shook his head at them. "Are shiny rocks rude? Is there a shiny rock day where they're allowed? What?"

His lips pressed into a line.

"What was your goal, giving me this?"

"To... give you a nice rock? Because after the temple I kinda assumed we were some kinda friends?" They straightened up and crossed their arms. "To make you happy, if you wanna get abstract I guess?"

"I see." He sighed, nodding to himself. He looked a bit too amused to be mad at them, so they were assuming they just messed up a little bit. At least it seemed to be in a funny way. He took a deep breath. "Generally, if someone goes through the trouble of finding your starstone, they're hoping for a specific form of response."

He waved his hand, bidding them to finish the line of reasoning so he didn't have to. They unfortunately did, eyes unfocusing for a second. Then they blinked and a look of mortification took them over.

"Hassain, tell me: scale of 'I like you as a person' to asking to fuck, where is what I just did?"

"That is a ridiculous scale."

Their eyes widened and they took a step closer, grabbing onto his shoulders before he could back away. He wasn't particularly motivated to, because he sensed no danger to it, but still. Their grip tightened as he tried to lean a bit back, though. If they didn't look so suddenly concerned, he'd have been more upset.

"Hassain, I have given several people rocks and I need to know if i just came across as the weirdo that hits on people with no context. Hassain, please." A slight pressure that hes was reasonably sure was them trying to shake him slightly. "I gave *Najuma* a quartz because she said she liked them, Hassain!"

"I... did not mean to imply that's what it always meant. Gifts are.. just what friends and neighbors do." He gave their arm an awkward pat as they processed his words and seemed to relax a touch. Enough to let him go, anyway. "My point was more... imagine you wanted chocolate. And you wanted to share the chocolate, because you bought more than you could eat. If you sat down in the tavern and asked if anyone wanted some, it would have no special meaning. Now imagine you had just so happened to make the same offer, but you had managed to catch someone alone when you offer the chocolate."

They pinched the bridge of their nose.

"Context."

"Yes."

"In my defense, how the fuck was I supposed to know that?" A sigh as they rubbed their face. "Well, thanks for telling me. I promise that if the day comes where I want to flirt with you, I will flat say so."

This earned another glint of amusement and a raised eyebrow.

"I assume your attempts would involve more rocks."

A snort.

"Nah, I'd just drop a solid hundred chaapa hide at your feet and ask if you'd like a coat made from them."

"That.... would be a large coat."

"Yes. But more importantly, you would have reserves for bedding and leather working and rugs. Or more coats." They held up a finger. "Which means I could theoretically wear them later."

"And why," he raised an eyebrow. "Would you be wearing my clothes?"

Their expression got suddenly very serious, if not a little grave.

"If I decided to flirt with you, it would be because I decided to love you romantically and that would mean sharing our things as we shared a life together." They nodded to themselves. "Which would mean I get to wear your coat. Or slippers."

"Ah"

After this the conversation was cut off by a Proudhorn teleporting through and distracting the both of them.

[luescris]

Listen. Guys. Listen.

As you all may or may not know. I have a massive, huge despise for 2012!Shredder. The rage I feel against him will never die. I am one of his biggest haters.

..... However.

What if I told y'all. That I also have a Oroku Saki redemption au. Not Shredder. But Oroku Saki.

Don't get me wrong. They're both terrible people, one just less so than the other.

But here's the thing. Here's where this all started.

You all remember the episode when Shredder came back again in season 5 right??? How he was not at all himself, very much more of a mellow, depressed "follow instead of lead" kind of person???? And how he quite literally shoved Kavaxas back into hell??????

Hell must have done some real fucking shit to make Shredder rethink his entire life like that. Like no way in hell would he have ever helped the turtles out like that by his own free will before. It's something that I think about daily and I have not been able to get it out of my head because it was SO out of character for him and as much as I hate him and know that I nor the Turtles would never, in a million years, give him a chance of redemption for all the shit he's done...

That part has got me thinking.

Like. Imagine this. Somehow, someway, because of that sudden out of pocket good deed, Oroku Saki is more or less cursed. Cursed to go back to the living, but not as a living, breathing human being. Not exactly a zombie, but not alive either. And he is cursed to watch after the turtles until every single one of his wrongdoings are at least somewhat forgiven and he's able to maybe move on to the next part of life.

So like. One day, the turtles get back from a patrol in a mostly good mood, only to absolutely stop and freeze when seeing they have an unknown visitor sitting on the couch, waiting for them.

Said visitor being Oroku Saki. No burns, no helmets or armor, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, cargo pants, sunglasses and holding a coffee in his hand. And all he does is stare back at the turtles completely and utterly calm.

It takes a minute for something to click, but immediately Leo is on it, moving within the blink of an eye to press his sword against Saki's throat and hissing, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't chop your head off right here, right now."

And Saki, ever so cooly, takes off his glasses and stares right into hate filled glare and goes, "You can't."

He then explains why they can't kill him, and how every time they try he would only bleed and nothing more, making a complete mess of their lair. April of course reads his mind (A bit too forcefully too because She Mad) but is surprised to learn that he was telling the utmost truth.

Saki then tells them that he's cursed to watch over them, and can't do anything else until his sins are attoned for, and none of the turtles know what to do about this entire thing, utterly stumped.

I'm not sure what happens in between them and the time he attempts to apologize after a few days of the turtles begrudgingly letting him stay but more so as a prisoner (at one point the man attempts to apologize but that only makes Leo snap and he runs a sword through him while saying, "You gave me these scars! Gave me this voice! This knee! You killed are father three times! The time for apologies is over!!! Do you understand?!?'' Will probably break down about it later with his brothers but yeah lmao) .

And of course once Karai finds out, she also immediately tries to attack, only to be completely baffled and betrayed when the turtles stop her, and even after they explain she's not only in denial, but filled with hatred, and vows to find a way to kill Saki before storming off.

I'm not sure what bonds there'd be. If any at all. Because this concept is SO odd to me and I could NEVER see the boys wanting ANYTHING to do with Saki in any form. But if anyone has any ideas they may want to add PLEASE say so I would like to hear them gfhfhdhd

Anyway. There's my super weird "Uncle(?) Saki" au. Do with this what you will fhdghxhddh

[hassiegfrieddoneanythingwrong]

Wanna know what really grinds Kriemhild's gears? Both Sieg and the Last Master of Chaldea have already followed in Siegfried's footsteps before she had a chance to steer them away from such self-destructive habits.

In fact, Chaldea's master may just proceed to further infuriate her without having much of a choice in it at all. At this point I'm not sure if she's angrier at her master's reckless stubbornness, or at Chaldeas itself for how many times they've had to rely on the master's dwindling luck to pull them through.

It's okay though. At least in my case when I'm done teasing her and nearly winding up dead for it, there will always be quality tea ready for her, courtesy of Sen no Rikyu and his newest apprentice.

As for Siegfried, not too sure if he's proud of the master, or increasingly horrified at how many times his love has had to give up more of their lifespan trying to aid Novum Chaldea at restoring the world. Probably a mix of both.

If you mean Guda/Ritsuka, then I feel like I'm not really equipped to give a proper answer to this compared to someone else, like Verse. There's definitely a lot of factors going on (being the Last Master of Humanity bc the world outside Antarctica is incinerated/the whole world is bleached, all of the other Masters candidates are fucking dead, having to save humanity bc this teen/young adult is literally the only hope, and even having Kadoc back on Chaldea's side might not even last long bc he might die), but Kriemhild is, without a doubt, pissed. At Chaldea, at the staff, at half of the other Servants, at Guda/Ritsuka, and when she learns why the incineration even happened, possibly pissed at Romani/Solomon and Marisbury as well. She's not paid enough for this shit.

Edit: in regards to Master, they could give any kind of answer to her as to why they joined Chaldea, and she would still be mad. Joined because saving the world, even when the events that would ultimately happened, sounded cool? They're sleeping on the couch with Siegfried for a month and a half. Kinda forced into it by a mage or regular family member? Not as mad, but still pretty pissed, and she now has a new target once this is all over. Joined because why not? She's mad and baffled. Joined because a few randos (who are Chaldea members in disguise) wouldn't leave them alone after giving blood in a blood donation? She's more mad at Chaldea now.

Siegfried would be... mixed. On one hand, it is admirable that they are willing to save the world. On the other hand, they (Guda) never asked for so much shit hitting the fan, and even though he loves both them and Kriemhild, it does frustrate him a bit that he can't do much besides help them in battle. He is glad, in a way, that they're not really going to sacrifice themselves like he did, since they're also intent on surviving through this.

Edit: roughly the same as before in regards to Master, plus a few things he's glad for like them acting as his impulse control of sorts, something that Kriemhild does appreciate. Although, if he finds out Master did join Chaldea because they wanted to save the world, he'll be like "oh no they were like me even before we met".

Once everything is said and done, I bet you 10 bucks that Kriemhild will take the polycule (plus the kids like Sieg and Jack) out for the longest possible vacation, because holy shit. Local Vengeful Widow did not ask for the bullshittery that is the plot of FGO's ongoing story.

[maehemthemisfit]

Parenting Fails

synopsis: tr men (mikey, sanzu, rindou) and chaotic events of raising children. (pt 1?)

warnings: underage drinking, child endangerment, just tiny people in bad situations and traumatized fathers.

masterlist - requests are open!

— MIKEY

Loves to throw his child up in the air as a form of entertainment which also seems to calm them down and make them giggle. It was all fun and games until he threw them up again.

It was a whooosh! followed by a BUMP! and his life flashed before his eyes.

The way this man's jaw dropped is beyond me. He caught his kid who looked dazed and baffled while he stood there, hand covering his open mouth out of shock and pure fear as tears welled in his eyes upon hearing your hurried footsteps and worried voice.

You were gonna kill him.

— SANZU

He had a really bad headache and could barely focus on anything, still you left him in charge of taking care of the little toddler. He had a meeting with Bonten so he had no choice but to take the little devil with him, leaving them with a secretary that looked stressed out of her mind.

He still made an effort to take a peek every now and then and give the kid some food- which Kakucho probably reminded him to do. Things were going well until it wasn't, shit hitting the fan when his kid staggered into the room abruptly.

"W-wad! I... want mo j..juice?" His kid nearly crawled towards him, their request coming off more as a question. It only took two seconds to realize what the fuck was going on, judging from the glass in his kid's hand that held remnants of the alcohol the other members were previously drinking.

"Shit!" He hissed, scooping his child up into his arms and coddling them. "No, no, no, you were fine like a minuet ago, why??" Sanzu cried, eyes blown wide and shaking his kid as his world came crashing down on him.

"I hope you made a will," Kokonoi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as Kakucho searched for a bottle of water. Everyone's faces immediately paled once they realized they dire of the situation.

"Yeah, no shit, she's gonna kill me for being irresponsible, then she's gonna kill all of you for not stopping me from being irresponsible!" His kid continued to slur and babble incoherent words which didn't help the panicking pinkette. "I'm too pretty to die..."

Ran deadpaned as Mikey's eyes widened when he caught a glimpse of Sanzu's phone, noticing a notification that was soon to end everyone's career. "Uh, Sanzu...?"

Bonten's number two sent a shaky look to his boss, eye twitching on the edge of a breakdown as he held his child to his chest, praying to the higher Gods that Mikey was gonna tell him something good.

"y/n's coming back in 20 minuets."

His heart practically fell out of his ass.

"Fuck."

— RINDOU

You know when you lose something that you can't find for shit so you just start looking in places you know damn well it couldn't be in? Yeah that was Rin.

"Get up." "Dude, you're kid isn't under this couch."

You know he's gone mad when he starts flinging cabinets open and close and mumbling how this was it, this was gonna be your 13th reason, it's all over for him.

Deadass lost his kid for a good two hours.

That was until he found the little gremlin walk in with a tired Ran and an annoyed Sanzu. Apparently, they found them wondering outside on their way back from a mission.

Yeah that could've gone way worse. Especially if you found out...

"Look daddy! I made a new friend!" His child smiled, bouncing up and down as they fumbled to retrieve something from their pocket.

"What is it sweeth-" Rindou choked when his kid pulled their friend out of their pocket, not even having time to react as this big ass fucking roach flew straight into his face, nearly getting into his mouth.

The WAY this man SCREAMED had Sanzu thinking his balls were kicked back in as the older haitani was left wheezing on the floor, watching his brother fight for his life against a bug.

Tears. This man was in tears. Out of all the humans on this earth and his kid 'made friends' with a roach.

He was gonna be sick

[yanderemommabean]

w the cupid stuff, all I can think of is ezrol and the cupids meeting by accident. or maybe like one of the black cupids was pissed off at ezrol for whatever reason and was like "yknow what? fuck you" and stabbed himself with his own arrow to make himself mad in love for ezrols darling.... jealousy ensues....

“You think you’re so much better than us, don’t you?” The winged creature sneers as Ezrol scowls. “I haven’t been proven wrong, have I? In my eyes you’re nothing more than a nuisance, shooting at those who don’t deserve love for the sake of your boredom and entertainment”. 

A snarl escapes the creature, his fingers clutching one of his arrows as he stares daggers at the demon king. “It’s a shame you see love that way. I feel it was a waste to use our arrows on your father. Your poor mother would’ve been better off with the likes of an imp!”. 

The air around them grows sour, Ezrol curling his claws as he breathes heavily through his nose. “You keep her likeness out of your mouth. My mother is more than some doll you play with, and you’ll show her and my late father respect”. 

The cupid narrows his eyes, gritting his teeth “To think you’re related to that of royalty. Your brother understands our job and how to love perfectly, yet you sit here and wallow in self pity and hate for the three worlds, as if waiting to be put out of your misery”. He slides the arrow back into its holder, arms coming to cross over his chest. “I don’t think even my most potent arrows could make your heart feel for another. You’re too selfish and closed off to any sort of affection, it’s a miracle that human managed to become your acquaintance!’. 

Ezrol snapped his teeth at the creature, eyes burning orange as he towered over his frame “Keep them out of this! They’re not to be spoken of by the likes of whore and degenerate makers like you!”. 

“Whore and-” he was baffled, about to go off again, when he realized why the new king was so protective. He grins, wickedly, seeing through the disguise. “Well, I’ll be a son of a bitch. You’re in love with them, aren’t you?”. 

The shock in the demon's eyes is priceless, and he can’t help the cackle that erupts from him as he makes the king go dead silent. “Haha! You are! Oh this is delicious! A high and mighty demon too good for anyone, suddenly in love?! A demon who’s job is to destroy anything a human brings near, wanting to protect and care for them?” 

“Shut up. You know nothing about this! About my duties or my plans for them!” he yells again, but the venom is missed by how hysterical the cupid found the entire fiasco. “Oh, you’re wrong on that one, dear king” he said with a sigh, coming down from his laughing high. He picks up the arrow again, glaring at the demon as he continues to load it into his bow. 

“You see, I'm a creature of many talents. I know more than I let on, and I’ve seen this tale a time or two. It’s in your nature to destroy and take, not to build and give” he bitterly stated, tugging the bow back as he aimed for the nearby wall. “You’ll ruin that human like you ruin everything else. Corrupt them and hurt them until they resemble another wasted husk of a being. I simply cannot allow that to happen”. 

Ezrol lurches forward, eyes wide in horror “What are you doing? What nonsense is this?! Drop that bow at once!” he demanded, but neglected to step any closer, not wanting to be pierced himself. 

“Oh you’ll find out. See, that little human you adore has been on my mind as of late too. More than a simple crush might I add. They have so much power and love, and only wants to brighten the world. They even want to show beasts like you and I a kind heart and a good time” 

“Quit stalling, what are your plans?! You think you can just make them fall for some other human, in my own court?!” he bellows, furious at the audacity the cupid had. To think he would allow that in any sense, what an imbecile! He’ll happily rip apart his wings feather by ugly feather! 

“No. I think I’ve had enough of you meddling in my affairs for them. I think I’ve earned my reward for sticking beside them so long, especially with the likes of you”. His fingers release the bow string, and the arrow ricochets off of the wall behind Ezrol, bouncing back to strike the cupid directly in the ribs, with an echoing cry of pain. 

“What..What have you done?” Ezrol asked while his claws flexed, watching as the creature laughed and writhed, his wings turning black. A blooming black ink seeped into the creature's once red wings, some feathers falling to the floor as he came to his knees and hugged the wound on his chest.

The corrupted creature just laughed, hugging his bleeding ribs more as he watched the mortified demon king. “It’s my turn! It’s my turn to take away something from you! You’ll just waste it and turn them into another corpse! No no, I can’t have that. I won’t let you take something you don’t deserve”. 

Standing, blood slowly coming to a stop, the corrupted cupid pierces the demon king's gaze with his own, baring his teeth in a snarl. “I will make them mine”. 

(Sorry if this was a bit ridiculous! I had fun! Tell me your thoughts! -Mommabean)

[knightotoc]

The Rise and Fall of Baby Yoda

Ever since baby Yoda united all the factions of SW fans, I wondered how long the peace and happiness would last. It was just such a good fucking reveal: the first ever unquestionably badass SW protagonist on this gritty TV show for grownups has to kill a man, and that man is...a baby Yoda. It's a twist on the level of "I am your father," except instead of Vader challenging a hero's sense of compassion, baby Yoda challenges a villain's sense of indifference. The audience of ESB realizes that the world is worse than they thought it was, and the audience of Mando realizes the world is better. In either case, it got a lot more complicated in a really appealing way, 'cuz now our guy has to get along with his enemy instead of just killing him.

And just like Vader's, baby Yoda's setup was always doomed to surpass its payoff. People generally agree that ESB is better than RotJ (I like RotJ more because I love bears and Ian McDiarmid, but I know ESB is better). And Mando's basically been sitting on the plot ever since episode 3, which is fine, if tiresome, 'cuz they're never gonna reach that initial high again.

It was remarkable to have something so neutral, so universally lovable: a baby, an alien without any of the politics of humanity, a fun little mystery they can indefinitely hold off on answering. But even with such absurdly agreeable content, we still wanna fight each other. And I'm afraid the peace is finally over (and good riddance!).

Here's a record of the various baby Yoda discourses I've observed in his first year of life.

"He's ugly." The first criticisms were from the flabbergasted haters, their eyes dazzled but their hearts undeclared. The fight was not on their side, and most of them soon changed their minds, worn down by the bigness of his eyes and the opinion of Werner Herzog. The remnants of this camp have largely exited the conversation and live on only in memes and stories.

"He's a corporate ploy." Following these weirdos, the smarties and the cynics got their hands on their opinion pieces. Disney+ is a menace and deserves every criticism it gets, pinging off its mighty armor like righteous pebbles. If baby Yoda stands for anything in the real world, it can't be anything good. Look at him, cooing and blinking, draining $7 a month from the pockets of the poor. He is there to distract from, even justify the rampant censorship and selfishness of his platform. Of course they are right, but this is the kind of thing we compartmentalize.

"Where's the merch?!" The most baffling problem of baby Yoda's young life was the utter lack of official merchandise during the 2019 holiday season -- and the more sinister accompanying problem of Disney's random lawsuits against fanmade stuff. Why the hell weren't they ready to sell him? We were desperate! Remember the drama of the immediately-sold-out fancy animatronic? This problem has been largely solved -- you can buy him at Target now -- but, for a while, it was really weird.

"He's not cool anymore." My favorite criticism of the little guy is "Baby Yoda is to millenials what minions are to Boomers." (I think Emma Benshoff on Twitter came up with this joke, though it has been repeated in a lot of places.) Nothing burns like Gen Z burns. The teens are too smart for this. Even without any storytelling baggage, baby Yoda's popularity weighs him down on its own. But this is the kind of outsider observation that doesn't really affect the fans themselves. If I thought I was cool, I wouldn't be writing this (and you wouldn't be reading it).

"Gina blocked me." While baby Yoda himself has been, until recently, blameless, his co-stars are human beings. Gina Carano, it turns out, is a hateful and transphobic conspiracy theorist, while Pedro Pascal is an antifa messenger, an advocate for immigrants, and an utter fucking delight. So good people are mad at her and bad people are mad at him. This rift is ongoing, with no word from the cowards on high as to how this will resolve. While this doesn't involve the baby directly, it is certainly an Event.

She blocked me!😎

And finally, #6, the egg thing. In the latest episode, baby Yoda mischievously eats some eggs from a nice frog lady. Many people had a bad reaction to this, and have expressed disgust at baby Yoda's actions, anger at Mando's lack of disciple, and disappointment in its comedic framing. Many other people took offense to their reactions, while others found them amusing and have delighted in the absurdity of baby Yoda, of all people, getting canceled. The battle lines drawn seem gendered and quite mean.

The egg discourse makes me sad -- not because the era of fandom peace is over, but because I think the boys are going to win this one. Male writers and directors will not learn to care about women's feelings, because how can you complain about baby Yoda? That's silly!

I am all for dark humor (it's my favorite thing about Star Wars), but the sexist history of this franchise doesn't offer it much protection from accusations of punching down. Try to be a little more sensitive, guys; everybody is watching.

[norgestan]

SPOILERS!!!!! // i actually despise the route they've taken, i really do. if they really wanted dani and amira, and if they were endgame, i actually wouldn't have minded - i would've sighed a little bit sure, but i'd be ok.... but what they're doing with kassim... i'm just ... wow. disappointed and frustrated is a huge understatement. if they wanted representation it would've been great, but making that representation someone who could've been a really amazing love interest for amira? smfh.

uhhh i tried to put a “read more” but it’s not working???

yeah like i really like how the show has handled the first steps on the damira relationship, where there’s a lot of communication and you can see that they’re both negotiating. my biggest complaint is still that dani is a white man taking the spot on what originally was the place of a muslim man of color. and in that sense, i won’t give eskam a pass. while skamit pretended that they “ethnic-looking” white non-muslim female actress was a hijabi teenager of color, and that’s something i don’t think eskam would do, eskam is the second remake that has taken away one of the spots of that couple with two people of color, so they go to a white actor/actress.

but i agree with you: the worst this has got to be the kasim subplot. i DESPITE it with all my being for the following reasons:

perpetuates the notion that all muslim people are homophobic, something that they show has fought before in cris’ season and in the video lucas filmed with amira.

actually, let me go back to that video. because i feel like the eskam writers didn’t look at that video when they were writing this bullshit. both amira and lucas make points about how homophobia is not inherent to islam, that one can be gay and muslim because it depends on how people interpret their religion and how they feel their faith, etc etc. but then kasim spews out the same bullshit amira was fighting in the first place: that lucas, who lives in a christian environment, will have the support of his friends and people around him, but because kasim is muslim he’s deeply scared and doesn’t want to come out. it’s not because lucas is white while kasim is a brown man, it’s not because kasim has had particular experiences with his sexuality outside his religion. no. it’s because lucas is christian and kasim is muslim. and of course christian people are waaay more open minded than muslim people, right? that’s how LITTLE NUANCE was put in the whole thing. the entire story is written like any youtube comment under a clip of las labass, saying that they will punch cris for being bisexual and other islamophobic bullshit.

this kinda shits on the entire religious subplot of og s3. in og, isak’s mother insistence with showering his son with the word of God(tm) was what held him back from coming out to her and part of his internalized homophobia. the season also made points how what isak believed in, aka the evolution, could also lead into homophobic rationalizations of the presence of gay people in the story of humanity, while sana made sure to tell isak (and the audience) that hatred came from fear, not from religion. isak suffered because he was in a white and christian environment, where people were either disgusted by him (his parents at first), completely okay with outing him because “it’s 2016, get out of the closet” (emma, vilde at some extent, bunch of other people who spread the rumors in school), casually calling him slurs (magnus), fetishizing him and even (the dance girls, the skam fandom), and then people who were supportive of him (admittedly, not all of these things were called out in the show, but people got the point with the first two groups). the only muslim character in the show had absolutely no problem with isak being gay, and supported isak and even’s relationship: sana even got mad when she thought the balloon squad hit isak bc he was gay, when they actually hit him because he fought them first out of jealousy - and back then it was the white girls who insulted sana in the bathroom and who theorized that the balloon squad were homophobic. so, like, absolutely all of that is gone here. and in the last dani/amira clip, dani says how his parents aren’t actually “good christians” (hmmm the christian cult survivor in me absolutely loathes that term) because they’re intolerant and homophobic, but the fact that it’s kasim, the muslim gay guy, who says he’s in a bad environment, means that the show wants us to believe and empathize with him, right? UGH. very progressive of you eskam. i’ve never seen this before.

let me expand real quick on that last point. so far it’s only been amira, a straight muslim girl, who has told us that homophobia is not inherent in muslim spaces. HOWEVER, we have an actual muslim gay character say to out faces that he feels oppressed and that his circles will never understand him the way lucas’ christian circles understand and accept him. and because he’s the gay muslim guy, we’re supposed to believe he’s right over amira, who has never experienced being lgbtq+ and muslim. WOW. I ABSOLUTELY HATE IT.

yet again other western stereotype of a gay guy nonchalantly asking amira to play as his beard. WOW. WOWOWOWOW. WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK. but what i hate the most about this is that amira is clearly SO disgusted by this, the narrative wants us to be on her side and demonize the closeted muslim guy of color for this. all while we were supposed to take dani’s al qaeda joke as a funny thing that amira adds to the list of why dani is the funniest guy she knows and why she likes him. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

moreover, i hate this entire conversation: because amira has had two people come out to her. cris and kasim. and when cris, white christian cris, told her she liked a girl, amira was immediately okay with all of that. but when kasim tells amira that he likes a dude, amira’s reaction it’s just SO baffling: she accuses him of FOOLING and LYING to his family and the people around him. but she never once questioned why cris hadn’t told anybody this yet, much less call her a liar for not coming out to everybody. what the fuck is this!!!!!!! not only this is yet another way that the show demonizes kasim, but it’s purposefully writing amira ooc to do so. wow. i absolutely hate it. i don’t think i have said that yet?

and to close this huuuuge rant off lmao, i just really dislike that everything about kasim’s sexuality is misery porn: begging for the white guy he likes (loves?) to understand him and be with him, the pressure of being the only man on his family, the pressure of his sister trying to find him a good muslim girlfriend, how oh so homophobic muslim people around him are... even if at the end the show ends up saying (again) that coming out as a muslim is Not That Bad, all of this is just, immediately gonna make white/non-muslim people look at this and think: “yep yep yep, muslim people are sooooo intolerant, not like Me, raised in a good Christian environment, where we’re Open Minded not like those arabs”. and i already hate all of that, no matter what the resolution is. this is SO catering of western audiences only. terrible writing choice and i won’t let eskam get out of this one. even if they found a way to say the right stuff at the end, what they’ve done for now it’s enough for me to step away from the remake. but i’ll be here to criticize it when the entire episode is out, you bet.

[yezzbub]

Idk what this is supposed to be, but I guess this is close to my own character analysis, review and reaction to Between Two Worlds! This is so late but I believe that it's better late than never😂 I'll also try to be as objective as possible (but I think that's gonna be hard especially when I talk about Philip/Phillip😂)

Again this is only about what I think and how I interpreted the series and the characters, no hate lol AND this is really long I swear by the stars :>

A. Title

Okay, so the title 'Between Two Worlds' initially made me think that it's gonna be about two people living in two different worlds and upon watching, I could say I'm partially right😂 so I like how it's suppose to symbolise the lives of two different families living in two different worlds. And when I say worlds it's not literally Earth and Mars, what I meant is like worlds as in how they live their lives.

So the Walfords are in the upper-class of society, they are rich, powerful, famous and feared especially because of their patriarch, Phillip. Their lives include deceiting, scaring, and messing with the lives of other people for their gain and pleasure🥺🥺🥺 in short, this fam is really problematic and chaotic😅

On the other hand, the Greys live a simple life in a simple house in a simple village. They have a loving family, yes, they had problems but it's normal for a family to have some problems.

B. Music

I really really love the music. That piano (I think it's piano) thing that is playing in the opening of every episode gives me the chills, the goosebumps. It makes me feel so many emotions like excitement, fear, and thrill,like it leaves me on the edge of my seat😂😭😂

C. Settings/Location

Deym, the location fits the story. I noticed that the main locations are their homes, it's where they mostly spend their scenes so I'm gonna focus on that. That high-rise apartment where the Walfords live screams privilege, fame, power and wealth. They are indeed powerful, they are at the top of the food-chain lol and they live at the top part of that apartment, a symbolism of their place in society _which is at the top. _I'm pretty sure their place makes them act like how they act all through out the series🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️.

On the other hand, the Greys' residence is located in a village(?) or subdivision of some sorts which I think is a simple place and a simple house symbolising their simple life that is away from the drama, away from the spotlight. Simple life gives simple problems I suppose😂😭😂😭😂

D. Families: an overview lolzz (Walfords, Greys, Konigs)

So like I've mentioned, the first two families seem to be the exact opposite of one another. Again, for me, the Walfords are so chaotic and so problematic🥺 the actions they did to one another just don't sit right with me, I think it's so twisted. Like it makes me realize how the grudges that people hold against others could make them act like that. It baffles me so much how they could even do that to each other?😳🥺 Are you so so hurt and so mad that you'll let your husband die in front of you and that you would just sit and chill on the stairs while he's suffering? And are you so hurt and so angry with your wife that you would imprison her in a cage so you could get back at her🥺 these people needs to chill and I think they need to let go of their grudges🥺😭🥺😭

For the Greys, well what can I say...they are pretty much normal, like they are how a family should be, what I could call the ideal. Again, they had problems but that problems were addressed and somehow solved🥺 I just like how the matriarch seems to be a perfect mother with a perfect relationship with her kids and the people around her but she's really like everyone else. She made mistakes and she wasn't even aware of the impact of her actions/words to her kids until her daughter mentioned it 🥺 but what I admire the most about her is that she's willing to take responsibility for her actions and to make amends(which I think the Walfords lack hehe)

Lastly, the Konigs. One word to summarize my thoughts about them: ugh. As much as how the Walfords have made a really bad impression on me, I think that these Konigs are worse than them lmao😂😭😂 this fam consists of the dad who is an unfaithful son of a gun who screwed the Walford matriarch and his hoho own daughter. The mom has some mental illness I'm not really sure about the specific illness which made her go to rehabs and kindaaaa drug dependent, and lastly, the daughter, she is a sly and a bad bitch with bad motives connected to bad people. I feel bad for the Konig youngling tho🥺 she's a bitch but I think no one deserves to be treated like how she was treated by her own father...that's a real disgusting act🥺😭🥺 so yeah, ugh.

E. Characters

Imma focus on them 👆 bec why not

1. Phillip Walford 👀👀

My babe, He is the Walford patriarch, he is a rich bastard who heads the Walford empire or whatever, who also suffers from a heart condition that he eventually needed to undergo a heart transplant. He's vicious and cruel and he's an I don't give a shit about your feelings kind of bastard. A man who probably suffered a lot from the trauma he had from his childhood oh poor bub😭😭 I also have every reason to hate him but I don't because I feel bad for him and his face and emotions,, it just makes me wanna hug him lol😂😭😭

He's like "I'm actually a nice guy but don't fuck with me" kind of man. He's also nosy and he sticks his nose to other people's businesses (Bella's plastic surgery) but I think he hates it when other people stick their noses in his business😂😂I love his sassy remarks and his nonchalant attitude especially towards his wife. He has reasonsss, he does that to punish her for something she had done years years ago that was something hehe quite unforgivable but hoho I could feel it and I could see it...I could feel that he is a jealous man who is in dire need of love and affection. That maybe he's actually still craving for her love and affection...but too bad, years of hostility towards each other had slowly burnt away the love they actually have for each other🥺

I like how he felt so bothered after the heart transplant because he felt that he's changing, he's getting softer, and getting more humane which he doesn't like because he thinks that his enemies would exploit that weakness against him🙄 I like how the badness and viciousness is so engraved to his bones and soul that the mere softness he's suddenly showing to those who surrounds him scares him a lot like a lot...

I also think that he really wants to forgive his wife,,,,but maybe his stubborn pride is hindering him from completely forgiving her...I also think that the reason he went out of his way to find his donor is, make a foundation for Danny, and like he really wanted to meet the Greys is because he somehow sees his ideal family when looking at them,,,it's like his what if, and a _I wish _and I think that's sad🥺😭🥺😭

This baby would have his world torn apart if he knew what his wife schemed on him

2.Cate Walford

She's Phillip's wife. I feel sorry for her especially for the first few episodes because her husband does not show her affection and love,,,he doesn't give her his time,,, he's giving her a hard time,,,and when she thought another man is giving her what she craves for,,,,her husband drove this man to his death or so they all thought lolzz I also like how she is actually a caring person, friend, mom, and wife👀👀

I know she did something unforgivable, she watched her husband have a heart attack, BUT she was initially really worried, she panicked like "Oh no, my husband is having a heart attack. What do I do?" Then she remembered that Phillip drove someone to their own death so she went ".....maybe you deserve to die, monster, how does it feel like tasting your own medicine you gave to others??" I don't forgive her for that tho hehe but that gave me a glimpse to what kind of person she really is.

Also, she's a very lucky woman and I'm veryyyy jealous because she has Phillip, a business tycoon and very jelly husband and eventually Dr. Julian, a well-known cardiologist, as her number two👀👀 I like her tandem with Sandra and I just went 🥺😭 when she opened up to her, like a girl talk of some sorts, it must have been so hard for her to keep all her thoughts and her regrets only to herself for a very long time. She's also pretty clever in a sly way because she schemed a plan against her husband to bring him back. Like bring her old husband back, the loving and caring Phillip Walford👀👀 she's determined to have their love back🥺🥺 BUT I JUST KNOW HELL WOULD BREAK LOSE IF AND WHEN PHILLIP FINDS OUT HER SCHEME HOHO

3. Bart Walford

He's the Walford heir and he's handsome but not as handsome as Phillip lol👀👀👀 he's wise and at the same time dumb🤭🙄 Wise because it would probably take some skills and some brains to appease investors to invest in their company and he did that when Phillip wasn't around. Dumb because he fell in love with a bitch with bad motives and he can't see it!!! 😔😔He loves her so much, he's basically blind ugh🥺🥺🥺

But I do admire how he's so ready to face and fight the whole world for Georgia,,, he'll do everything for her,,,he tries so hard to understand everything about her,,,his world seems to revolve around her and I think that's sooo bad😔👀👀 I mean I don't think that you really should make a person your world because if that person betrays and leaves you, your whole world will crumble apart and you're basically fucked🥺😭

As a 'son' , well,,,,he's a pretty nice who helps his 'father' scheme something to bring down threats for their business🤭👀 I like how defiant and fearless he could get when he got fed up with Phillip😂😭😂😭 I also like his relationship with his mom, they're closer than I initially thought and that he even helped her against Phillip🤭👀 so I therefore conclude that badness is not really innate in a person lolol😂😭😂😭

4. Georgia Konig

Ohoho,,, one word to describe her: bitch🙄 she's so good at manipulating people around her to get and do what she wants. She appeals to the emotions of people around her, making them feel sorry for her. I hate her so much. On top of that, she killed her own father,,, I wouldn't really blame her, he's really disgusting...

She wants to get a part of the Walfords' riches so she paved her way in through Bart. I just hate her so much because she's taking advantage of his feelings towards her🙄 little baby doesn't deserve to be treated like that, little baby deserves to be loved for real

To be honest,,, I don't really think she really loves him. I'm pretty sure that she feels something towards Bart but it's not real love, maybe she does like him a lot but she doesn't really really love him. She's just sticking with Bart because of his inheritance because she wants to have some of it and since she knows he's really into her...well,she took advantage of him🙄😭

I like her dry remarks tho, maybe it's just me but she makes me snort and chuckle sometimes. I also like her voice cause I think it's beautiful and really seductive, and really suitable for her character. She plays crazy pretty well for me too👀👀

5. Sandra

Oh, one of my favorite characters! Deym, she is so precious and I love her so much! She is a nurse that worked for the Walfords for a few months. She is bubbly, nice, loving, caring, and fearless. She puts the arrogant and stubborn ass of his boss in place which I love the most! She's not afraid to talk back to Phillip lol😂😭😂😭 she even called him an over privileged white man with anger issues when he's too stubborn while she's caring for him,,, that line was gold😭✊

Behind her smiles and witty remarks, she's actually going through something very hard in her life. Her son got disabled after getting involved in a skateboarding accident, her husband left them because of guilt, and since then she's been taking care of him🥺 which makes the working for the Walfords situation a saving grace for them.

Together with Cate, they schemed something against Phillip. They made him think that he has Danny's heart. She doesn't really want to fool the old man but because she was promised a fortune,,, for her son,,, even if the means weren't good,,, she said yes. It just shows her big respect and big trust on Cate, but I think, however close they are,,, fooling people isn't just in her moral compass so she'd probably get guilty about it😔

6. Sophia Grey

First off,, I think she's a great mom. I like how she really exerted effort to make the right things even if it costs her a lot. However,,apparently she has a trait which makes her act like everything is about her when it's actually not BUT atleast she could swallow her pride and she would actually try to make things right, which I think, deserves an applause👏👏 I mean that's rare for a parent to admit they're wrong👀👀

She's a loving mom, wife, and friend. She's not perfect but she makes effort on making herself a better person which I think the other characters lack lmaoooo😂😭😂😭I like how her love for her children is so big, and she's pretty much a normal mom. She is supportive of her children's shenanigans and all she wants is to see her children happy🥺

If she found out that she got lied to, I think she'll lose her respect for the Walfords👀👀

7. Danny Grey

We only got to see so little about him but here's what I think: he's handsome lol,,, he's athletic of course, a loving son, a loving fiance possibly a real husband material, and a PASSIONATE man! I mean the love he has for his family, his fiance, and his sport is just so great🥺🥺

It's sad how we only got to see so lil about him since his death is the drive of the plot, so okay,,,

8. Bella Grey

Oh, babyyy🥺🥺🥺 she's Danny's sister who's a very veryyyy talented girl! She plays the piano, she's musically inclined, she's pretty, soft, precious, and lovely! I'm gonna fight anyone who says otherwise😤

She felt as if she's only a shadow of his probably popular brother which makes her feel invisible. She thinks she's plain and that she's just sooo thankful that she's talented or else she's just nothing🥺😭🥺😭 I think it's sad how she resorted to plastic surgery to make herself seen and noticed. It's sad how she thought that changing herself would make her seen which made her think that she is the problem but babyyy nooo!! 🥺😭🥺😭

I love her relationship with her mum! They're like bestfriends and it's so lovelyyy🥺💖I love how she has strong intuition noticing and feeling the Walford's patriarch's seemingly uncharacteristic approaches on them👀👀 so yeah, I love her🥺💖

9. Dr. Julian Lee

He's the hot cardiologist of Mr. Walford and Mrs. Walford's number 2 lol😂 he's a well-known doctor so he probably have the skillz and the brains no wonder Cate fell for him. So, he's pretty much a good guy despite having an affair with a married woman because in my eyes he seems to treat her better🥺🥺🥺

I like how he banters with Phillip and their exchange of spicy words are gold👌I see how hurt he was when Cate decided to break up with him because it seems to get better with her husband BUT HE LET HER GO OMG,,, maybe he truly loves her?? Because he just wanted her to be happy?? I really would have wanted to see more of him🥺😔

10. David Starke

He's the coach and he's a widower who fell in love with Sophia Grey. Hmmm,,, he's pretty hot too lmaooo... He's a giant! He's also kind of a low-key asshole,,,

He was pretty okay during the first few episodes, he's always there to give support to the Greys, maybe because he's really a nice guy or maybe it's because he loves Sophia and he sees her as his wife 👀👀 I just kinda hated him when he started being a dick to Bella's friend who was just joking! He said something like he doesn't like his humor and that that kind of humor is the last resort of being likeable if the person is not actually attractive and I was like whut bruh??? WhAt?🥴🥴

I'd love to see how his relationship with Sophia would continue especially that he was initially jealous of Phillip bec he was tooooo close to her (David doesn't know the reason why) and it was hinted in that godforsaken ending that they learned about the lie,, I would have wanted to see how he would react and how he would confront the Walford patriarch about it😔

11. Mikael

So he's the bearded buff diver guy. He was an ex military (?) and is now a mercenary. He's close to Georgia, I'm not just sure if it's just because of her money or something else. So he's pretty much a fucked up guy. He's clever, he's strong, he's hot, he's handsome, he's scary, and he's probably crazy too.

He does anything and everything, as long as you will pay him his price. He's also the type of guy who you should be afraid of getting on his bad side because he will make sure he would get back at you.

12. Bishop Welles

One of my most hated character, he's an enabler and I hate him😤 he's that calm old bishop who threw shade to Phillip Walford, a well-known business tycoon, during his friend's funeral. Like,,, he's saying that Phillip must have done something driving the death of his friend, Mr. Konig. Making Phillip withdrew all donations to that church lol

He also never believed Georgia's testimonies that she was being raped by her own father and even called her father to get her. He made her life worse.

F. Plot

To be honest, I liked the plot... I love how it started with having glimpses of how these families live their different lives away from each other. I like how the main motif of this series is revenge, greediness, and how family relationship differs,,, I really love how the plot is so new to me that it hooked me up into watching the whole thing making me look forward into it for every week. I remember doing the math so I could watch it live, having a mini heart attack when my Internet was being nuts lagging at the pivoting moments of the show, and squealing every time Philip goes to view lmaooo😂😭😂😭

I honestly like the twists and all, I really liked how the story went until that fucking ending.

8 eps in and I was like 😳 "gosh, there are so many happenings how would everything be resolved for the last two episodes??" and "there are more bombs to be dropped yet hcndkaodns." Then the writer went "haha, nonsense plot twists and cliff hangers go brr" and he basically ruined a good show I HATE IT SO MUCH. Maybe IF they're gonna renew the series and will have a season 2 where everything would be actually resolved like how a decent plot happens, then okay, I'll forgive you, Mr writer. But leaving us, the viewers, hanging like that after that wtf kind of ending is just too cruel and just too selfish 😔✊ I even recommended this show to my friends and they're pretty fine with it and like me, they think the plot is cool up until that stupid ending...

It was a real roller-coaster ride of emotions, I love how it made me feel. The constant 'oh my god, I love where this show is going' and 'this is so good' made me feel so happy except that ending...It was actually my stress-reliever although the plot is sooo stressful to the nth power lol

Will I recommend it to other people?? Well,,,, sureee why not?! I mean if I want them to know why I'm simping over a 60 year old big man, oh why not🤭🤭 For the story?? For revenge maybe? I want them to feel robbed off a good ending and I want them to hate the ending too as much as I hate it lolololll kidding aside, welp, yeah, I'd still recommend it to make them feel the roller coaster of emotions I also felt🤭👀👀

[universal-kitty]

I'm going through... Girl issues... So I was wondering how you'd imagine your F/O's would react if they found you upset over your time of the month?

   Y’know, this actually lets me to bring up a fun fact I’ve never really gotten to use before.... The fact that sometimes, I have a headcanon about everything. From what they do/use while showering, what modern clothes a certain older-time-period F/O would wear, and so on... Just little details I think up while going about my own day.

   So! While I haven’t thought of this one actively, it’s definitely something that’s cropped up for me. When things hurt, the only thing you can do is think up an F/O to comfort you, right??

   So! For those who I have icons for, we’re gonna get right into how they start comforting when things get to be too much. Sorted into “knows what they’re doing” down to “has no idea, but is trying their best...”

Abe Sapien: He has no idea what’s going on, at first. This is something he has to study, so the first time it happens, he’s a bit behind on the program.

Come the next time, Abe not only completely knows what to do, but even starts to soothe pain better than what most human doctors could provide.

Hard to figure out how he does it, but honestly, who’s complaining?? He’s a savior to those who deal with cramps and his way with words make it easy to just listen to him and not focus on how gross nature can be.

Kurama: You want a sweet boyfriend who’s going to fuss over you until you feel better?? Look no further than the sweetest redhead, Kurama.

When he was forced to get along with humanity by being reborn, Kurama ended up getting attached to his human mother. So that meant learning about ways in which he could help, especially as she gets older. This meant learning even more than he thought would be necessary, but that’s fine. Bound to be useful someday, right?

Sooner than he thought.

But it’s worth it, in it’s own way. He finds it really fulfilling to help his “mate” with such a problem.

Also likes to pride himself on getting used to it and knowing sometimes before even the other does that, oop, you need this now, right? Here you go~

Mordin Solus: He prides himself a scientist, so when the topic of cramps and bleeding comes up, Mordin immediately wants to learn all about it.

I rank him as “helpful”, but sometimes that’s a bit questionable, to be honest. He’s mostly there for research. He will help with the pain, though. Can’t have that!

“But pain is fascinating. Judging by flow, must be to stimulate it. Get it all out. Remarkable.”

He’s a little gross like that, but still lovable. Besides, he likely ends up learning a lot from that, thus making your own period-experience go a lot better.

Thane Krios: Thane’s been around long enough to know that humans bleeding are a thing. Especially in undesirable places in females. Isn’t that life, though? He usually didn’t pay much attention to it.

But now he’s picking up that past slack, recalling things he’s heard and learning things as he goes to help.

It honestly upsets him a little when his Siha is in pain, but feels better knowing that later, she’ll feel better... This wave of pain just needs to pass.

He’s the most understanding of the ones who “don’t get it, but do their best”, honestly. Thane understands that it’s a messy thing and if things get bloody in the process, it’s alright. It’s natural and he’ll help out however he can.

Toshinori Yagi: He’s bleeding, they’re bleeding... It’s a mess. Everyone in this apartment is bleeding in one way or the other. (But his isn’t supposed to be happening naturally, so... She’s the one better off, hah!)

It’s a little...embarrassing, but he’s happy to help. Especially since most people will now call him out for having a girlfriend and that’s just.... Such a nice thing to be constantly reminded of. He’s got a girlfriend. He’s helping his girlfriend by doing this. Nice.

He fusses a lot for the first one, but by the time a year is out, he’s got everything down pat. Remind him of how much better he’s gotten. Watch him be proud of himself. It’s CUTE.

Godot: Speaking of sweet guys doing their best, here’s a Godot. Not as sweet as the others, maybe, but his bittersweetness is still great to have around. (Okay, I’ll try to chill with those lowkey coffee refs.)

...Actually, there’s not much to say on him. He is a really good boyfriend in that he goes out and buys what his girl needs, no problem. Doesn’t bat a lash at it, aside from asking about what brands she prefers. Oh, and does she want snacks? Probably should get a few of those two.

Most of the comfort snacks will probably involve coffee...and by “probably” I mean most certainly. Coffee is love, coffee is life.

Link: He has no idea what he’s doing, but is he going to do his best?? You betcha!!

(Gonna have to write this one in some kinda...modern AU. Cause do Hylians even bleed? What do they do, then, when it happens?? These are questions unanswered.)

It’s pretty frustrating for him at first; he has no idea what he’s doing and his girlfriend is in pain. If there’s anything this reincarnated hero doesn’t like, it’s people in pain that he can’t help.

It’s why he has to learn from example and then slowly gets the idea of how to make it all work. From working with cravings to what brand and type they like best.

It’s no Ganon, but seeing her smile makes him happy, sO--

Tom: He’s a mild bit surprised when he realizes ‘oh shit, my gf is bleeding and that’s natural’... Cause for some reason, it strikes me that Tom would likely not know a lot about this kinda thing.

He does his best and that’s what counts, though.

Also tries playing his bass sometimes. Anything that might distract from the pain of cramps.

This is coming from the possessed guy, but humans are fucking weird.

Tord: He initially tries to play it off like he doesn’t care...but he does. He goes through multiple stages of emotions before deciding that it must suck to bleed like that....but that’s so cool!!! So hardcore!!!!! Bleeding and pain, hell yeah!! How do you make periods into a Red Army motto?

It’s mostly Paul and Patrick who tend to his S/O more than he does, but... Mm, Red Leader business is happening. He’ll be back whenever he feels like it.

...It’s sooner than you think.

He’s so awkward, but he tries. Mostly cuddles by the way of him flopping on top first, and then rolling over when complaints are being muttered into his hoodie.

He actually surrenders it sometimes??? A real treat, coming from him. And it’s always the one he’s been wearing up until that point, so.... Perfect.

Captor Family: I’m gonna use Psii as a placeholder, cause... Honestly, the fam as a whole would more or less treat their S/O the same way, SO..... Yeah.

They’re all confused. Human girls bleed?? Why??? Trolls don’t. Why would humans? What... What?? Makes no sense. Something must’ve gotten lost in translation.

Sollux acts like he doesn’t care (much like Tord), but also will still shove things onto them that they don’t know how HE knows.... Either he snoops or he’s been spying again. ...Letting him off the hook this time...

Mituna does his best. It’s mostly getting things for you, while collabing on snacks, and then he contributes by trying to make you laugh and feel better. It’s...nice. He’s a sweetie~

Psiioniic is the biggest adult of the trio, in the sense that he does what needs to be done and without any of Sollux’s tsuntsun attitude. Is it still a little embarrassing for him? Yes. Does he do it anyways? Of course! Also, being cradled in psionics is a 10/10 experience. Super comforting and also a little tingly.

Sidon: One of the most baffled of this group, Sidon is also the most concerned when his beloved admits to bleeding from time to time. That does not sound good! Do they need a medic...?

Being natural is even harder for him to accept, but he does... Still worries him, though. (He later files it under “More Reasons Why My Beloved is Amazing” and starts using it as another excuse to sing praises, but.... Who’s complaining to that....?)

He does what he can to make things more comfortable. If it’s in his power to do (and usually, it is), then he’ll do it!! (Or ask Link for help, if it’s something harder for him to do alone. Surely the Gerudo could help more??)

Pain will lessen with Zorae doctors on the case and you’ll never feel too bad when Sidon reminds you of how amazing you are.

....Someone please get me a real-life Sidon, I need a do-gooder fish guy in my life--

And to represent the vampires of DiaLovers as a whole... Kanato icon. Cause honestly, if you ever wanted to watch a group of guys usually end up enept because of a monthly thing, welcome to the Sakamaki/Mukami/Tsukinami households.

Kanato is often the worst of them. The scent of blood makes him want to drink, but that kind is bad...and for the moment, he does recognize that he can’t have his fill because of the current situation. It makes him mad and fussy.

He only finds his peace when sitting in the gardens. Keeping them just far enough that he see, but not smell, and singing to himself softly. That’s much better for him.

Kou Mukami also gets pouty, but handles it a lot better. He also actually knows how to help with such issues, which is a relief.

Azusa Mukami is...less talented than Kou, but that’s often why he’ll go to the other for help and advice. He sorta thinks bleeding like that is neat, but... Mm. Also not entirely interested. It’s a confusing thing for him, really.

Carla Tsukinami is the worst of the group... Second only to Kanato, maybe. Gets huffy with the scent of blood in the air, prone to angry fits, and doesn’t know how to help. So it’s bad for awhile. Gotta point him in the right direction and then he’ll start cooling off...

Yeah, that’s the trick, here. Once he feels helpful, then he relaxes. Like.... Jinkies, Carla, calm down. It’s not the end of the world, yanno.

[eeriestatic]

The moment maya went off, the doppelgänger sealed up entirely with raised brows. Listening, however she knew why for Lios but as for Varro? Not truly. But Ezme didnt interrupt her going off regarding the two, lips pursing with a soft snort. There was an explanation gap she didn't get to explain yet - but having someone else being mad in her stead was a bit turn around for her. Unexpected, baffling almost to such degrees. But the mere thought of them constantly in her space? That was a big no, but she quickly chimed in. "-just to add, lass, that book is actually a watered down version of Lios. Very watered down, comprehensible for a human. It was an item of ownership over an old deal-- not by me, but you can blame jojo for digging in places she's not suppose to. Useless ancestor..." She muttered, shaking her head. "Anyway- Lios was trying to ward him off, though dumbass seems to nor have his either. So what the fuck?" She sputtered. Although her gaze followed Maya, a brow raised and more with her question.

"Flustering him with handholding? I just see some stuff. However you make it seem like you're doing something else now-" She chuckle, turning her head away to gawk at the ceiling again. Although she was paying attention for the most part, she hummed softly before placing the back of her hand over her eyes. "I think Varro can see that. That's the thing-- only after it happens anyways, but nevertheless I can't say for sure. But I feel Lios is like that anyways, but I'm sure him as a person was lost a long time ago. Aside from what comes out..." Ezme was very much aware of the human side of the Lich. Whereas whatever Lios is. Who that is. She shook her head, chuckling away to herself now as soon as she mentioned the area of Varros face. Whilst her other following weren't lost at least.

"I get what you mean though. But... He actually does have a face. He just often hides it, sure it might look gone at first even without the bandages, but he's not faceless. Maybe you'll see it eventually; he has eyes that make you want to pluck them out though. Like gems?" The doppelgänger snorted, sitting upright again with a heave. "Are you sure about that?" She vaguely questioned, side eyeing Maya now visibly.

eeriestatic

Providing her words and the ways of working that happened in her past all because of a book made her grimace. Shaking her head, all that insight was nice but at what cost? Ezme chuckled anyways about it though, rolling her shoulders into a shrug. “It’s ruined my life but I guess I wouldn’t be here where I am without it in the end. I’m not complaining at least, though I’m not a big fan on what complications it’s caused me, but it’s a result of an awakening curse. I’d have got rid of it if I could if I wasn’t bound to it, and without it close by for various amounts of time riles the curse and makes me extremely sick… As long as I can feel it’s presence, even now with the only one in access, I’m safe from it’s negative drawback. Otherwise I’d let Varro have it to be honest, they can fight over it. But sadly. One had the reigns over what it was and me for awhile. So that’s why I know so much about them, I’d go in depth but there’s a lot… Very complicated. It’s easier to put it as purple is my boss and Varro is the bosses work partner that got let go. See? Though I don’t know why– but this was a problem before I was even down there and before I knew who Lios was. So lios helping me is probably him trying to prevent Varro from barging in on my shit I guess- I never bothered much either to ask.”

However, the topic problem for Josiah made her sigh. “That I can say I did when I escaped. I hid away in a symbiotic relation with her, unknowingly though. I was a false subconscious that took over her headspace, however the combined sickly affliction compiled into her body because of me often caused her some lash out issues. I don’t think you’ve seen it yet, but it’s gross when it happens. I just caused problems for her but I was ready to step out and or defend, because I’m 100% sure she doesn’t know who they are- I think she’d only seen Varro before until I booted him. I took responsibility at least…” Ezme puffed her cheeks out before sputtering - falling onto her back, bouncing a bit.

“However. You’re not wrong. He is, I think Lios took advantage of that factor but yet- I don’t think Lios is like that. He’s been pretty sincere with me at least, despite being a prick. But Varro? I think he’s just a harmless reality bender that’s a dream feeder. I never understood how my hostility in my conscious with him made him act bad accordingly. I learned that last. But he’s not that bad… Hell, if I knew all that ahead of time, I’d have acted more docile and kind. It’s not truly his fault.” The Doppelgänger closed her eyes, throwing her legs off the side of the bed now. The follow up words made her snort, throwing a hand over her face. “I’d be the temporary death of a person if I did die. The one common thing me and my other share is that curse. Varro though? I don’t truly know how death limits him but I think there’s a reason Lios never tried. I think he can die like anyone else. But hey- don’t ask me a question, you better expect a serious answer, at least on that.“ She jerked her head in Mayas direction. "You seem to be keeping an eye on him though. I see things.”

      The more she fleshed it out, the better she understood. All of the pieces to the puzzle were falling together and, although some gaps still remained, she was confident that she got the gist of it for the most part.

      ❝It makes sense why you would be fighting to keep the book if its absence has such detrimental effects on your body and mind, but what’s their problem?❞, she sounded a tad annoyed at the two of them. ❝Someone needs to tell them to knock it off. That someone might just be me, after all. Trying to mess with another person’s well-being…Why can’t they reach a compromise? The simplest case scenario would be…They get the book, but they are obligated to hang around you until the end of days. I’m sure neither of you would be cool with that, though. So they might as well cut it out already.❞

      Those words came out like spitfire since she had no need to draw breath. It was obvious that she was getting mad in Ezme’s place, almost like an empath that was feeling a little too much all at once. Eventually, she did take a moment to calm down and rewinded Ezme’s words in her brain. Suddenly, she did a double-take and stood up on the bed, her legs tucked underneath her. It didn’t take a looking glass to see that she was flustered, even for a moment.

      ❝W-What kind of things do you see? There’s nothing to see here.❞, she blurted out thoughtlessly, fidgeting with the frills of her dress. ❝I would simply hate it if someone took advantage of him because of the way he is, that’s all. Right now, I feel like a duckling, you know? He was the first face I saw after I popped up in here.❞, she paused, tilting her head. ❝So to speak, at least. If he had a face, that is. But still. Surely, I will find my own place and way around here soon enough and we won’t be hanging out around each other so often.❞ Whether she really meant it or not, Ezme’s guess was as good as any.