#I'm just more focused on the psychological torment

[thelonelynindroid]

Pillows and blankets fucking me all the way up

[realkaijuhavecurves]

The conclusion

Depends in its entirety

On the story you tell:

The rise and fall of a species

Or

The joy of a little life, the only one you get, lived and enjoyed, no matter its historical backdrop

The comfort and warmth of connection,

Subjective experiences like

Loving and being loved

Accepting yourself and living in the now,

Cherishing only what is here at this moment

Every life must end, after all

And so, perhaps, must every civilisation

Is it a story entirely of arrogance, greed and hubris?

No; it is a story, also, of people devoting themselves to finding a solution, risking their careers, livelihoods, even their own lives

Forgoing easy answers and complacent vicissitudes

Whatever happens, know that it was not about one single thing;

It all depends on the story you tell

[dreameralive]

but on a tangent almost completely unrelated to that last post of mine i do find it very interesting how wildly the characterization of Slenderman changes from person to person. i don't just mean slenderverse vs creepypasta here, i mean... well, everything. but i'll mainly be focusing on slenderverse, here.

this is partially why i wish people explored the slenderverse beyond the popular video series' of it, but i think it really is worth considering each depiction of Slenderman, especially ones that drastically vary from the 'norm' that we may think of when it comes to the character. take the blog JustAnotherFool (which, while now only available via the Internet archive, is something i highly recommend giving a read!), for example. there, Slenderman is portrayed as this horrific, spiderlike creature who wears a fedora and rips people to shreds himself. it's completely the opposite of almost every proposal of Slenderman i've ever seen in the context of the slenderverse - he's not a silent observer, nor a commanding authority. he's a beast. he's angry.

even in popular slenderverse webseries', he changes a lot. for example, in Marble Hornets, he's a, like i said, silent observer. although he brings so, so much devastation to these characters lives, he doesn't seem to have all that much investment in them. it's a matter of hopping from one to the next to the next to the next. it's about spreading. now, compare this to mlandersen0 or everymanhybrid, where Slenderman actively seems to almost delight in tormenting these characters, for presumably, as long as he possibly can. he is an active force in these peoples lives. everything he does to them is so deeply, deeply personal. he goes so far as to maul someone who was abusing Vinnie in the Fairmount timeline. why? well, the text says it itself. "the man doesn't share."

there's also the humanization of Slenderman, like how i mentioned above, where he seems to have some sort of psychological capabilities to him. he is choosing to do this. he is choosing to hurt people. which is deeply, deeply sinister. a horror that wants you to suffer, specifically. a horror that knows what it's doing. a horror that does it all simply because it can. but there's also blogs and series' where he's portrayed as nothing more than a stupid animal, or some sort of infection. where he runs on instincts, a need to feed or to spread, and nothing more. which is also quite disturbing. a horror that does it all simply because it can do nothing else.

this is all, of course, only really scratching the surface. and anyway, i don't really know what point exactly i'm trying to make here. but, i guess this is a good conclusion to end on: please don't be afraid to stray too far from popular depictions with your portrayal of Slenderman! and please look into more slenderverse media that isn't simply MH/EMH/etc! it's good stuff!

[seriousbrat]

imo it's not so hard to accept that SWM takes place after the prank. I mean it is canon so too bad but it makes complete sense to me. there's no evidence the prank was some big life-altering character development moment for any of the characters involved and that they all learnt their various lessons. in fact we see that they don't. in SWM the marauders are clearly still tormenting Sev. In Sev's conversation with Lily post-prank he's still just as obsessed with the marauders and exposing their secrets as ever, if not more. he doesn't consider what lily's saying at all because he's too focused on his hatred towards them.

my hc is that sirius (rather masterfully) used reverse psychology on sev to get him to go down the willow. Sev isn't stupid, he wouldn't have let himself willingly be led into a trap by his worst enemies. I think Sirius probably "let it slip" and then "backtracked" and acted like Snape wouldn't be brave enough to go down there anyway and that he should just forget it. I doubt Sirius directly told him to go down the willow, I think cleverly he told him not to, knowing that Sev would do so anyway (not that this makes a difference ethically bc his intent is still clear, but anyway. this isn't about who is morally better because idgaf honestly lol, I'm just trying to work through their mindsets)

the marauders received no real consequences for the prank, so why would they learn their lesson? Objectively you can't really punish someone for telling someone not to do something if they do it anyway. Not particularly fair, but still. Which brings me to Sev's responsibility in the matter (which yes, does exist imo) we're shown that he was obsessed with finding out what the marauders were up to and particularly obsessed with Remus's secret. Yes, this is understandable given how they treated him, but absolutely not healthy and he still chose to go down there, whether out of pride, greed, curiousity, vindictiveness. He obv was manipulated but there's a reason he was so easily manipulated. As I said previously, his obsession with revenge is what causes him to be blind to lily's feelings.

James rescuing him wasn't some moment of epiphany about how bullying is bad actually. It was just a fundamental part of James's character already. He would never have let him die regardless of how he felt about him.

All of this makes SWM the PEAK moment of hatred between Sev and the Marauders, which explains a lot of their responses. Sirius and James hate Sev more than ever for trying to expose Remus. Sev, justifiably, hates them more than ever for trying to kill him (and he ropes James into this, which is incorrect but understandable in his position)

James "deflating his head" probably wasn't just based on one event in particular. He just grew up and learned what was more important- being a good person, fighting against voldemort. But Sev also had growing up to do of his own during this time. As I talked about in in this post yesterday I think post-swm Sev was beginning to realise that his lack of control over his emotional responses (calling lily a mudblood out of humiliation, for example) was dangerous both to lily and to himself.

Yeah they still hated each other and attacked each other in seventh year. There's too much bad blood there to do anything else. I've talked about the dynamic between Sev and James here and how that might have developed as they grew older. I honestly find it extremely interesting, I could go on about these two for hours rip. My point is that the development of these characters into adults wasn't instant or linear, it was messy and rough. people don't usually change overnight, it happens slowly over time because they have to.

[imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese]

Destinytober24: Day 17 - Fragmented

...it might have been a nightmare.

Link to Ao3 if you prefer to read it there

It's dark and the air is thick with moisture. That's the first thing the Drifter notices.

There are frogs and draperies of moss-like vegetation. The water sparkles, glowing. Wait. Is it water?

No. That's not water. That's Radiolaria.

The Drifter looks around, his eyes adjusting to the gloom. There's angular stone protrusions all around. This is definitely Nessus. The malachite green glow of Soulfire appearing down a nearby tunnel causes him to rest his hand on Trust, but moments later he relaxes because it's just Eris.

"Hey, Moondust," he says as she steps out of the tunnel. She doesn't answer him. This is not unusual, but her complete lack of reaction is a bit odd, as though she didn't hear him. Eris Morn has excellent hearing. Usually she will sigh or make some other dismissive noise to acknowledge him if she is purposely focusing her attention elsewhere.

"Eris?" The Drifter asks. She turns to the side, examining the wall.

The Drifter walks over to place his hand gently on her elbow. "Hey, Three-Eyes, whatch'a doin'?"

She stills at his touch, tilting her head. "I miss you, Rat," she says, her voice suffused with sadness.

"Well, good thing I'm right here."

"Would that you were," she speaks dispassionately.

"No, seriously, I'm right here, lover." He reaches out a hand to brush his fingertips against her cheek, not minding the coolness of her paracausal tears sliding along his skin.

Her three eyes dim and she leans into his touch. "You feel so real." There is pain in her voice. Sorrow.

"I am real, lover, I'm literally standing in front of you touchin' your face."

"I had thought the pyramid on Luna bringing back my dead fireteam to torment me was the greatest psychological torment that could be inflicted upon me. But this… you here now… the physical ache of your absence, the memory of your touch, the longing to hold you again… this is worse."

The Drifter stares at her in confusion. A nessus frog splashes into a pool of radiolaria behind them.

Eris catches her breath. Before him in the dim lighting black diagonal lines appear on her face and body, like long parallel cracks.

"The end then," she whispers.

"What?" he asks.

His throat clenches in horror as the black lines along Eris' face begin to widen and slide against each other, splitting her apart, fragmenting her slowly in front of his eyes.

"Would that I were with you…" Her voice is becoming more and more distorted. "I did not wish to go through it alone."

He reaches out shaking hands to try to push the pieces of Eris Morn back together, like squaring a messily stacked deck of cards. The pieces of Eris slide against his fingers and move farther apart.

"No," he whispers. He grasps wildly but the pieces of her are slipping, breaking into even smaller slices.

"I loved you, Germaine." Her voice is barely recognizable. "Why did you leave me behind?"

"Eris!" He screams her name as though if he is loud enough it will solidify her identity and knit her back together again.

The pieces of Eris Morn collapse into a heap on the ground at his feet with a sound like broken dinner plates. Her Ahamkara bone hovers a moment in the air, whole, before it, too, falls down with a loud crunch, shattering bits of her with its landing.

The Drifter sinks to his knees and grabs the orb in both hands. "Bring her back," he says, his voice trembling. "I don't care what it costs, you bastard! Bring her back! I wi-"

The Drifter feels himself violently lifted up in the air and slammed into a wall. The impact makes a metallic, hollow sound. His vision goes white.

He blinks.

It's still very bright. A cool hand rests against his cheek. He closes his eyes and leans against familiar fingers.

"Germaine." Eris's voice. Her normal voice. Not distorted. "Can you hear me?"

He blinks again. Nessus is gone. There's no frogs. The bright lights are in the ceiling on the Derelict. He's staring up at them. He is lying on his back on the metal grating of a hallway floor.

A shadow interrupts the brightness of the lights above him. Three green eyes peer down at him, unbound. The scars around her eyes flex and shift. Eris' mouth below them is twisted in concern. Small short tendrils of hair dangle down like fingers.

The Drifter laughs. It is a painful laugh, tinged with hysteria. He begins to sob and tears well up in his eyes.

"You're ok," he rasps.

"Yes," she says.

"And you're alive."

"I am."

"And I am too."

"Yes."

She helps him to sit up. He rubs the back of his head. There is blood. He looks around. He is wearing a loose clothing for sleeping. Eris is kneeling beside him, wearing one of his shirts. It comes down to her knees. Both are barefoot.

Her glowing orb is in the corner across the hall. He looks at it in concern and back at her.

"Was I…"

"Attempting to make a wish, yes. I hope I have not overly harmed you. It was necessary for me to act quickly."

The Drifter glances around and his eyes rest on a bloody splotch on the wall. He pulls his fingertips from the back of his head and looks at the blood on them, then at her, and nods.

"Thanks. Has it… Has it ever done that before?"

"It has tried. It has never succeeded to such an extent in the past, but it has only ever really had myself as a potential victim. I will be renewing the warding. Perhaps my protections have become weakened over time."

The Drifter nods and leans against Eris. Whole Eris. Not split into pieces. Not left to die alone. He pulls her close and nuzzles his face into the scars along the side of her neck. She smells of wet earth tinged with vinegar. He focuses on her breathing and his own, her warmth and the feeling of her skin against his own.

Tactile. Present. Real. Grateful. Alive.

Link to the entire month's worth of prompts on Ao3, posted daily.

[homestuckreplay]

Cursed By Zazzerpan To Take Webcomics Too Seriously

(page 472-483)

8/14/2009 Wheel Spin: Captchalogue Lore Verdict: Just Captchalogue, No Lore

8/15/2009 Wheel Spin: being silly :3c Verdict: Slimer Pogo Ride – Inherently Silly

The imps have STOLEN John’s clever disguise. >:( How could they do this. Aren’t their jester hats costume enough. When John says ‘they’re mucking up all my cool stuff!’ he is right and justified in being mad. What little control John ever had over his living environment has now been completely obliterated, the imps (and Rose) running rampant and using his home as their own personal playground.

Speaking of Rose, I was deeply struck by her total lack of regard for the monetary worth of a piano. Those things are expensive, and they’re not a standard thing for a house to have either! But this is not the first time Rose has thrown an expensive musical instrument around, as shown by her violin antics (p.236, 395) being more of an annoyance than a risk to a delicate possession. Knowing how rich her family is really explains why her response to destroying John’s house is a casual ‘Oops.’

We also get another moment of Rose dismissing John’s problems as not especially serious on p.478, when John says he was ‘hoping to avoid nanna and her spooky ghost cookies’ and Rose says ‘that does sound dumb.’ I know that Rose is speaking from her personal experience, but from an external reader’s perspective, if I am going to take it seriously that Rose’s mom might be an alcoholic and that Dave’s brother might be psychologically tormenting him with puppet tricks, then I am also going to take it seriously that John could have genuine trauma surrounding food. If he’s been forced to eat beyond his limits or eat food he doesn’t like all his life, that could definitely lead to a negative relationship with food, even if John’s dad and nanna are baking for him as an act of care.

EB: i'm not sure what came over me there, i was acting really crazy for some reason. EB: but my head feels like it's clearing up, i think i'm alright now.

This is the line that’s had me scratching my head and clenching my fists all of yesterday and today. I’m truly not sure what the intended tone is – if this is meant to be a joke, or a leading question about how exactly the control panels and possible time loops work, or a setup for a possible future where John does something really bad while being mind controlled by the Vagabond, or just a way for the author to justify any potential future out of character moments. I think I am biased towards reading this story in a serious and realistic way, and I think there’s lots of other valid ways it can be read, but from my personal reading this is existential horror, and more affirmations of John’s complete lack of free will and – importantly – his steadily growing awareness of this. I think a big part of his character progression so far is going from the vague and uncertain ‘something feels missing from your life’ to slowly being able to put words to his problems.

We actually learn a fair bit more about the rules, game logic and progression of Sburb in these pages, which I’m planning to lay out in its own post in the next few days. In contrast, we get no new information about the captchalogue and strife systems – it really feels like John’s passed that level now, and is able to do these things in the background without it interrupting the narrative. The same thing will probably happen with the imps after he’s got a few more kills.

I can’t figure out how to score points in the game on p.476 where we do sick pogo ride tricks as an imp (my high score is 551?) but I love it narratively. In the game we are definitely controlling the imp directly – there’s no indication that John or Rose have any hand in the imp’s antics - but in the text below, John is still addressed as the second-person ‘you’ and the line focuses on John’s own history with the ride. I like the suggestion that the imp is doing the same dangerous stunts that John once did, and the idea that there’s some parallels between John and the imp – both low level entities who are fundamentally at the mercy of the greater forces of Sburb, both clowns wearing disguises through circumstance instead of choice.

Anyway I am politely requesting that John check out the punch designix for real now.

[hey-that-hurt]

Dr. Stone Whump Fic Recs

Per the request of @cloudyinvasion, and @thesuffererrrr might appreciate this list too.

This list will focus on bookmarks I've saved that are particularly whumpy or angsty, but as with the One Piece list DM me if you want to get all my AO3 bookmarks or any items I didn't feel comfortable sharing here.

I won't hide anime spoilers, but I'll hide manga spoilers.

Senku is one of my favorite whumpees. He has all the spunk and confidence of a shonen protaganist while physically being about as weak as a twig. And he's aroace! Not technically canon, but canon to me. I find him super relatable. And I want to see him hurt.

My Favorites

Death Sentence by Lieyantosh (@lieyanro on tumblr! they have some great whumpy art for this story on their blog) 68K words and ongoing. I am OBSESSED with this fic. Senku is captured during a devastating attack on the village, and brutally tortured by Hyouga. Senku struggles with his injuries and severe trauma, and his imprisonment under Tsukasa isn't helping things. Meanwhile, Tsukasa gradually realizes the extent that He Is The Bad Guy. Amazing plot and tension and suspense and whump and recovery that is only sort of recovery because the trauma is ongoing! Updates about every month and I read every new chapter almost immediately. One of my all-time favorite fanfics.

Eight Weeks by Luna_Moon22 Senku wakes up Hyouga instead of Tsukasa. When Hyouga realizes the power Senku holds and Senku realizes the danger Hyouga poses, Senku sends Taiju and Yuzuriha away to bide time for a rescue while he stalls under Hyouga, who wants him to make more revival fluid for him and is quite willing to resort to torture as "motivation".

Counting the Seconds by Sky_King Hyouga and those loyal to him kidnap Senku in the night, and it takes a bit for the village to realize he did not vanish willingly. Senku counts to try and keep his sanity as Hyouga tries to torture him into submitting to him. About 50% before rescue and 50% after. The recovery period is very very difficult, just as I like it.

One Mistake by Luna_Moon22 Senku is captured during a battle during the period where Gen had become loyal to the Kingdom of Science but was still acting as a spy. With a limited time before Senku is brought back to Tsukasa and likely killed, Gen bides his time as a double agent and waits for an opportunity to save Senku. Things quickly become complicated as Gen is asked to supplement torturing Senku with psychological torment. Some mild SenGen.

Inklings of Doubt by kiokukara Alright, side tangent for a moment. You know the season 1 episode The Treasure? The one where it's Senku's birthday and Gen and the village surprise him with an observatory and telescope, but the way they do it seems in every way like they are betraying him and handing him over to be killed by Tsukasa? I'm obsessed with it. Those few moments where we see Senku's inner emotional state as he puts on a brave face, showing bravado even as his heart breaks as he realizes that all these people he trusted, that he cares about, are about to send him to his death? AND THEN EVERYTHING IS IMMEDIATELY FINE? I'm obsessed. Anyway this is a brief what-if fic where instead of calmly waiting to die Senku attacks and runs away. I have a WIP continuation of this fic that I REALLY need to keep working on where Senku manages to escape before anyone can communicate the misunderstanding, leading to Senku struggling to survive by himself in the winter while the village desperately tries to track him down and explain that they aren't actually trying to kill him. Anyway yeah this fic is good.

The World Rests on My Shoulders (I Can't See The Stars Above) by RubyDragonQueen Another fic about the The Treasure episode. This one is canon compliant, focusing on Senku's mental state from the moment he is grabbed and blindfolded for his birthday surprise, to him secretly breaking down out of sight once the celebrations have ended.

Crossed Your Mind by Luki (KelpieCodyne) Not whumpy and not super angsty but really good so I'm including it anyway. Gen is actually psychic, and the stone world is like a breath of fresh air. Covers the ways that canon events change and stay the same up until a bit after Gen formally joins the Kingdom of Science.

Unseen Essentials by Justdumbfics Another one that honestly isn't all that angsty but I love. When Gen notices a lot of women going in and out of Senku's tent, seeming embarrassed, and getting reduced workloads, he worries that he's misjudged his friend's character.

Unseen Enemy by Justdumbfics Love a sickfic with a threat of death! When Senku realizes that Ryuusui has seemingly caught some sort of disease, the Kingdom of Science quickly takes action to prevent the spread and be prepared for the worst of the symptoms. But before development of treatment methods can be fully completed, Senku falls ill-- and his lack of natural immunity combined with his weak constitution means he takes it harder than anyone else.

Like Judith and Holofernes by divisiblebyfour Senku does not come back to life after Tsukasa strikes his neck and kills him. With no choice but to live under Tsukasa to survive, Yuzuriha and Taiju grieve. And Yuzuriha plans.

platinum rings for the end of the world by prikachuu (elenafizz) SenGen, ongoing. Gen and Senkuu are stuck in a time loop that restarts if either of them dies, sending them back to the day of the petrification. The two of them struggle to stay motivated as they relive the thousands of years of petrification over and over, in addition to the trauma of their deaths.

This Too Shall Pass by ArtMunNotebook Manga spoilers. The chase through the wilderness is a lot longer and more perilous. Senku is injured and doing very poorly. Not gonna say much more to avoid said manga spoilers, just read the tags and summary.

Whumpy

Territory by Luna_Moon22 Tsukasa intervenes when Senku is tortured by members of the Empire of Might. Senku's relief fades when he realizes that Tsukasa's behavior is not because Tsukasa is being merciful, but because he is being territorial. No noncon, but Tsukasa is yandere in this.

What They See by Luna_Moon22 As Tsukasa allows the Empire of Might's members to beat him, Senku desperately hopes Taiju and Yuzuriha are not there to see it happen.

Stealing My Breath Away by Jaggedwing Senku has an undiagnosed chronic respiratory problem from before the petrification occurred. Anxious that it could make him be seen as a liability, he does his best to hide it. This becomes no longer possible when he has a severe attack in the middle of traveling with a group.

Blindsided by Dragoniangirl An explosion burns Senku's eyes. Senku struggles with sleep and sensory overload as he waits to heal enough for the bandages to be removed, not knowing if he will still be able to see.

You didn't fail, and I'm hear with you now by AliceAlyss Post-Treasure Island, Gen helps Senku when he is injured by a lab accident, and learns that Senku has been dealing with the urge to self-harm due to anxiety and guilt over past failures and near-failures.

Fix Me; Fix Who? by Widow_Spyder As the Treasure Island ficaso is concluding, it is discovered that a piece is missing from the head of Gen's statue. As the search for the missing piece begins, Senku tries to hide how terrified he is from his friends. Sengen.

Scarlet Painted Sleep by Birbliophile A couple alternative turns of events leading to character deaths, presented as nightmares.

conversations with a house of cards by stagbody Moz is even more brutal and cruel than in canon. Before the entirety of Treasure Island is petrified, Moz stabs Gen with a spear, leaving him to painfully bleed out. After Gen is de-petrified, Gen lives with the trauma and Senku struggles with guilt.

Hope by anonymous_dragon In a version of events where Tsukasa was far, far worse, the Kingdom of Science explores the camp of the Kingdom of Might after Tsukasa's death and finds Ukyo, who has been kept prisoner for far too long.

stood beneath the burning tree (and hoped to rescue leaves) by yelp When Senku's promise that no one will die is unable to be fulfilled, Ukyo hands him over to Tsukasa, believing that this is the best way to minimize bloodshed.

Consequent by Hamii (Ham_ham) In a post-canon world, Senku is captured and tortured by a cult that worships the eternal life granted by the petrification devices, furious at him for ruining their immortality.

we're so blue, my neptune by breathethepurple (bleedpurple) Manga spoilers. Gen is used as a hostage to force Senku to reveal himself.

Ain't Dead Yet by Blade_Wielding_Ace Manga spoilers. A brief expansion on that whumpy thing that happens.

Shattering a Stony Mask by Blade_Wielding_Ace Manga spoilers. The enemy catches up to Senku. He is shot right before he is petrified, and his friends find his statue with his fear of his impending death frozen upon his face.

And I Hold On by RubyDragonQueen During the first six months, an albino Senku gets severely sunburned. What would have been a minor concern in the modern world poses a severe risk as Senku worries what will happen if the blisters become infected.

Angsty

I'll Bear This Burden (We'll Do it together) by RubyDragonQueen During the building of the Perseus, the responsibilities and trauma weighing on Senku cause him to spend multiple days without sleeping. His friends intervene.

"Sorry, that's not enough for you" by al_the_arsonist No petrification AU. Senku is aroace and doesn't realize it, and has self-esteem issues due to not knowing why he is how he is. Gen accidentally accuses Senku of not loving anyone, hurting his feelings. I personally don't see Senku as someone who would care much about what other people think about his behavior, but I don't care it's a fic about one of my favorite characters experiencing the joy that comes from finally realizing there's nothing wrong with him, he's just aroace. I'm fine. I'm okay.

Unseen Scars by WriterzBlock Gen is there as Senku wakes up from a nightmare after Treasure Island. Senku opens up about the many things that have been weighing on him since he first emerged from petrification.

Red-Eyed Ghost by Birbliophile A continuation of Like Judith and Holofernes, mentioned above. Yuzuriha and Taiju move forward, and Yuzuriha hallucinates Senku's ghost.

Second by Second by RubyDragonQueen Manga spoilers. [spoiler character] is the only one there to help when sudden darkness causes Senku to have a panic attack.

Ashes, ashes by cherrycotton Manga spoilers. Senku witnesses what happens in chapter 189.

one second at a time by Anonymous Senku struggles with isolation at night. Ukyo finds him having a panic attack, and offers to sleep with him. Like, literally sleep with him. Though this fic is a little bit shippy.

Winged Rät by StormStreaks Manga spoilers. Senku gets to do some much deserved yelling.

through the cold dark night by Fathomless_Crazy Senku is afraid of sleeping. Gen helps.

we've ridden the stars (from saturn to mars) by jumpinginmuddypuddles Manga spoilers. Gen goes around and helps people with whatever is troubling them.

memorial by discorale The reality of the stone world finally hits Ukyou. Comforting may not be Senku's forte, but he does his best.

Last Message by calmingchick_en Byakuya left Senku a second, more heartfelt record.

Waiting Once More by RubyDragonQueen Manga spoilers! Senku waits again, uncertain what the fate of the world and himself will be.

Counting Fics

I felt like these needed their own category. If you are looking into these fics without having watched/read Dr. Stone-- first of all fix that, but secondly you'll need to know that Senku spent something like three thousand years petrified, but mentally awake, perfectly counting every passing second. This is not treated as horrifying by canon. Much of the fandom disagrees.

And The World Moves On by EvilGenius Moments of Senku's time under petrification, and the ways he quietly struggles to cope after.

It's been a long day (without you my friend) by DecimalSheep Senku can't stop counting, and after the isolation and sensory deprivation of the petrification there are some things that are difficult.

Always Counting by That_Tired_Girl Gen talks to Senku about the counting.

An Eternity in a Night by A_Thousand_Skies (cywscross) Senku counts in his sleep. Gen and Ryuusui help his mind calm down. Gen/Senku/Ryuusui.

Heartbeat by Hadrian_Pendragons Ukyo overhears Senku having a nightmare, and helps him calm down after waking him up. Ukyo learns about the counting.

[starheirxero]

XERO, I JUST WATCHED THE NEW LAES AND SAMS EPISODES-

I FEEL SO FED- OH MY GOODNESS, I KNEW, THE PEACE WOULDN'T LAST-

The creator is officially making his move!!!👀 I smell the Lunar Angst already-

It also opened up the interesting question of limits! How far can Lunar go? They seem to think, only a bigger wave of electricity is taboo, with wind and light zaps being fine, but are they correct?

Earth's security protocol is honestly terrifying, hearing her talking so sweetly while beating someone up- I'm honestly so happy, that they're focusing a little more on their robotic sides, it's so interesting!!! You have infected me with robotic brainrot👍

AND MOON, OH GOD, MOON- He's losing it!!!

I've seen people think he dreamed, which is likely! Personally, I Interpretated his actions as hallucinations! Walking around and yelling at air, punching the ground!

Either way, he's going through pure psychological torment, the poor guy, and I'm honestly afraid for him!

On a more positive note: the Ultrakill crossover cracked me up- Imagine Gabriel losing to fingerguns- I adored the art you did for it even more!

-Stardust

RIGHTTT!!!! It's been a long time comin' honestly, and he said he'd take what he wants the hard way if he has to!! And with the limits on top of it all, yea!!! I can see their reasoning for how they're working with stuff right now but I can't help but think about how explicit Gemini was about no powers and it's like bwah!! nervousness forever!!!!

AND THE SECURITY PROTOCOLS IKRRR the joyful tone vs the fact she was beating the shit outta that thang.... AND YEAHAHGDE THE ROBOTNESS !!! I love it when they are machines hooray!!!! ^_^

AND MOON YEAH OMS THAT'S BEEN TRIPPING ME UP FER A MINUTE NOW.

I've both seen theories it was a dream(< what I assumed too), a hallucination, or maybe even some Forkface fuckery! I feel like, knowing the shows, any of the above could be the reason so ultimately yeah, whatever it is? it is fucking him UP!!! Whenever Moon gets choked up it's like an immediate +50 emotional hit to my heart HDKSJDK

AND GABRIELEJAOXJD I KNOW I'M STILL NOT OVER IT. The way he turned his back on Lunar like he was pouting fuckinf KILLED MEEEJAKAJDKD

[clockwards]

wanna talk about all the things i love and wish were developed more in the btvs boys

- xander is never a coward even though he repeatedly says he is/looks down on himself and his abilities. he is sometimes even more willing than buffy to go into to danger to protect his friends in the first few seasons, and although it's written as an excuse to 'get the girl' it never ends up that way. i wish instead of them having him remain a "weaker" comedy character and pressing on his insecurities they let him begin to trust himself and have the others trust his abilities in turn. s3e13 'The Zeppo' is such a COOL fucking episode for him but no one else knows what happened and he goes back to being "the same old xander" afterwards. I wish he was written to be allowed to grow into his confidence without directly growing his insecurities towards the girls and their levels of power. in later seasons he does but then his old insecurities pop up just for the writers to cause group friction. anyway i wish we got to see more of just xander, I think that would've been so fun and cool

- i love early s4 Average Joe riley. he's just a dorky guy who loves psychology and doesn't even realise when he has a crush. I love that he's awkward and the potential he and willow had for friendship that kind of petered off. sometimes I really wish that they'd let him actually be an Average Joe and see what that changed for the season. and we never really see that awkward side of him again! he had all the traits to be a malewife and they took that from us because they wanted a strongman instead :[

- giles' morals degrading over the series!!!! him being so proper at the beginning and each apocalypse/major event undoing that just a bit more. realising that if he is Buffy's Certified Adult then she deserves his full and absolute protection wherever he can provide it. and he does fall into the dad role quite well but he is first and foremost a Protector (which he isn't meant to be because he's a Watcher!!!). also I don't think I've seen anyone talk about him putting on the record he and joyce were playing during band candy shenanigans after her death. and him full out killing ben end of s5 :D

- angel!!! angel being a dumbass!! you don't get to see it much in btvs so I guess this is more ats content but listen! he's new at having a soul and sure there's the guilt and the brooding and the torment but there's also joy and humour and comfort and silliness. angelus is a very focused character who does feel things, but only very intensely and basically one at a time. angel feels it all at once! and he gets to have fun, or he should. ats shenanigans are good for the heart, he deserves cordy and wes being annoying and lorne dragging him to parties and playing video games with gus and fred.

- oz has that autistic rizz (I know this because I'm autistic and had a dream we kissed)

- spike [LOUD YELLING, SCREAMING, CRIES OF THE DAMNED AND DOOMED TO HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY] haha yeah nothing much to say here. just a totally normal guy.

[donnerpartyofone]

Ranting, complaining.

In my admittedly limited experience something that makes for bad therapy is the reductive impulse--the approach of reducing all psychological ailment to some general, universal experience. This is supposed to make you feel like you're in good company and not beyond help, but it can also be anonymizing and condescending. For instance suicide prevention rhetoric that focuses on the idea that it's all about loneliness makes me sort of crazy; I mean certainly there are instances where alienation is the main thing, especially with younger people I'd bet, but it's infantilizing to suggest that an adult couldn't have bigger, deeper problems than the need for more phone calls and hugs. And I think this misunderstanding enables the argument that suicide is a cruel thing to do to the people in your life, which is this awful mind trick people play to convince themselves that the pain of loss is serious but whatever pain it is that compels you to actually end your own life is somehow inconsequential and bearable. Apparently you should have just made more phone calls and asked for more hugs, no problem can't be solved by that, and if you didn't do this then other people get to hate you. I've seen people get so angry at their dear friends who committed suicide, and I've been in very bad places just to be told something like "you are not alone." Like no offense but I fucking know that, you're standing right there saying it to me aren't you? Please don't treat me like some lonely teenager, I have other things going on.

Another reductive thing is the strategy of trying to convince the patient that they are "normal". There's a post I once saw here about how someone's therapist blithely tells them "I mean what even IS 'normal' anyway!" like it's this amazing revelation, and the person lists three or four patently aberrant and damaging experiences that most people would never understand in order to say "Can you just try to get on my fucking level with this please?" Maybe that person WAS tormented by feeling abnormal but it's obviously unfair of their therapist to treat them like they can't tell their circumstances are unusual. Besides which you can accept the enlightened cosmic view that there's no such thing as "normal" or that there are more people like yourself than you'll ever know, and you can still be tortured by the effects of your experiences. Universality is not much comfort if something really hurts you.

A big part of my mental health struggles have to do with what I now understand are ADHD-related problems (and I believe ASD is also involved but I don't have that diagnosis yet). Like let's say half my problem is really deep complex depression and fear, and half of it is just the fact that every day is way harder than it needs to be because I can't get a grip on basic tasks. It's the Sisyphus thing, you might think you're a pretty decent guy and that many people share your problems, but eventually you may start wishing that boulder would just squash you the next time it rolls back down because the situation is unmanageable. My first therapist treated me like I was exaggerating or making up all my practical hangups due to low self-esteem. My third therapist accepted that I was being truthful but she would say to me, "Well what if YOU'RE not wrong, what if the rest of the WORLD is wrong!" Like yes I agree the world should be more accommodating to people with different neurological conditions or whatever but whether or not I blame myself for everything, the "everything" is still wrecking my life. Doing mental gymnastics to put a positive spin on it has zero effect on what a hard time I'm having. Please don't talk to me like I'm some child who has never heard that it's OK to be different. If you do I will go insane and I will roam the streets doing Victorian madwoman behaviors and I will not get over it for a long time.

Another thing therapist #3 did that seems to be popular was to take away the words "insane" and "crazy"--and like I do understand what that's about, a generalized diagnosis of just being "fucked up" doesn't help you get to the bottom of things. But if you prevent me from saying those words that will not stop me from feeling crazy and insane. You're just arguing semantics with me when we could be talking productively about my issues and this may actually make me feel crazier.

[daemon-in-my-head]

3 & 4 for the ask game!!

Ooh spicy, thank you for the ask!

3. How do you prefer to portrait your Durge? Do you enjoy them in writing or their visuals more? If you're a writer or artist, would you/have you commissioned someone else before? Would you like to, in case you couldn't yet do it?

Honestly I'm gonna say both, cuz I adore both his visuals and his personality. If I draw anything and actually put effort into it/get absorbed in the hyperfocus I usually intend to tell a story anyway and his themes perfectly match what I usually enjoy. With writing it's the same, though I'm ngl it is harder since his head is tackling a lot of thoughts I usually tend to avoid myself. Nevertheless it's still enjoyable as hell.

Haven't commissioned anybody yet but hopefully one day I'll get to do it, broke ass bitch rn for reasons

4. How did Durge come to be? Why them? Was it a vibe you tried to capture or a specific visual you wanted to represent? Did you borrow them from previous works or were they handcrafted for this story you have in mind?

I'm a mmo girlie, the kinda mmo where you are your character. Which is to say, I've never actually did the OC thing before so he's wholly original and crafted exclusively to suit my ulterior motives aka I specifically made him up to suit the story I'm trying to tell.

As for why, well I had no actual OC and my prev Durges didn't quite fit the vibe or the story I wanted to tell.

I love all the marry sues and the unhinged Durges, and I love all the durgetash stuff, doing it myself on the side tbf, but I wanted one who's grounded in reality with just enough whimsy and madness to be an escape and a story that focuses primarily on the torment and contradictions they must've felt, but I found none so I figured imma make my own, hence why i needed someone who can be that person.

At the end of the day, elves, Durge, and somebody who exists so closely to death and is inevitably tied to it, yet desperately clings to an absolute shitshow of a life is a wonderfully heart-wrenching and tragic character. And I'm a sucker for all things tragedy.

Well tbf I had an 'oc' but that was just an unnamed genderless character whom I exclusively referred to as child or young and who was only used for some psychological horror drabbles that never saw the light of day and are more creepypasta than anything lol

[dinoburger]

honestly I think one of the biggest appeals of anarchy is that there is a major disincentive for cults of personality to form - obviously they still do, but those seem to fizzle out relatively quickly

if the core principle is autonomy, you don't really need to have done an extensive amount of research to be able to assess whether someone is giving you means to further your autonomy or restrict it.

a lot more of these super intellectually focused marxists seem to focus heavily on these groups as a sign of a failed movement as a whole, but in a more optimistic way the failure of anarchist cults is a sign of success for anarchy as a whole.

I genuinely think a lot of marxists have their hearts in the right place and don't necessarily intend to build cults of personality, but I've seen even staunchly "anti-Lenin" marxists have practices that are barely distinguishable, except for the terminology they use to describe their position. And I think the Russian revolution does have a lot to show us about theory and practice, but it's not that Marx was basically a prophet or that Lenin was or that Trotsky was or whatever - more about the triumph of struggle but the perils of needing to rely on a very rigid framework that can't adapt to the peoples' needs and enhance their autonomy.

It's a box I see a lot of socialists too put themselves into and just refuse to budge from. It's been a bit eye-opening to hear people I generally respect praise Maduro as "incorruptible" because he happened to tout the right socialist buzzwords, and opposing "conservative propaganda against the left" dominates the minds to the point where complicated reality slips past.

I'm frankly terrified of these people who are willing to give free passes to the "right kind" of dictator, or psychologically torment people if they have the "correct" reasons to do so. I'm terrified of what hierarchical power and ideological domination does. I'm afraid of being tricked into being abused again.

I'm glad there's at least some schools of thought that encourage safeguards against these things.

[findroleplay]

🕊 hey all! i'm currently looking for an adv.lit–novella, oc x oc rp. i love developed and complex characters and slow-burn relationships. my specific interests include dark romance, obsession/possessiveness, and more twisted, character-focused plots. the kind that can be brainstormed, developed, and worked on together– encompassing both our preferences, hcs, and ideas. psychological (horror), philosophical themes, and darker dynamics are a favourite of mine. so, if dark, twisted, complex romance rps are your preference, then you're in the right place!!

a little about me » 20F writer, gmt tmz. adv.lit-novella (multiple discord messages/6-10k+ characters), loves literature. prefers playing F roles and writing with other F writers. replies slowly (once or twice per week), but is quick with OOC. engages in lots of headcanoning and planning for rps. wants to feel love&worry for your ocs bc that's how you'll feel about my crazy darlings (i love imperfect, twisted, flawed OCs). fine with dead-dove & darker themes, specifics like limits/triggers can be discussed in dms.

what i'm looking for 》 an enthusiastic collab partner!! my rp copium is communication, so let's fangirl together!! gimme headcanons, pinboards, properly detailing the rp, character dissection, sharing tiktoks, analysis, character&dynamic building - i love all that, so let's do it all!... ideally, i'd love a fellow novella rper, mxf pairing, preferably another f writer.

this is unashamedly a plot call for my beloved rambly writers. i can plan & write for pages, partners who give the same energy back and CONTRIBUTE have my heart. my policy is that i will give as good as i get, so if i'm providing pages of ideas and getting nothing but one-word replies in return, then my interest will die. please try to have a similar energy to me, and we'll get on so well!!

my current tastes lean heavily into 》 dark romance, halloween-inspired rps, supernatural inklings, dark academia, gothic vibes, and various other macabre themes. including, but not limited to: graveyards, murder mystery, torment, mind games/mindbreaking, ghosts, insanity, entrapment, psychedelic darkness, insanity & reverence. enemies-to-lovers trope. childhood friends trope. sinfulness, warped ideations, distorted self-image, and god-complexes, hallucinations, manipulating & rewriting one's reality, gaslighting, and just all those darker themes. preference for including characters like arsonists, former cultists, serial killers, delusional individuals, and twisted characters. settings that are decaying buildings/small towns, drowning in epithets of graveyards, churches, and mystery.

if interested, like this ad & i'll get back to you asap <3.

-

[darkdoverpseeker]

🕊 hey all! i'm currently looking for an adv.lit–novella, oc x oc rp. i love developed and complex characters and slow-burn relationships. my specific interests include dark romance, obsession/possessiveness, and more twisted, character-focused plots. the kind that can be brainstormed, developed, and worked on together– encompassing both our preferences, hcs, and ideas. psychological (horror), philosophical themes, and darker dynamics are a favourite of mine. so, if dark, twisted, complex romance rps are your preference, then you're in the right place!!

a little about me » 20F writer, gmt tmz. adv.lit-novella (multiple discord messages/6-10k+ characters), loves literature. prefers playing F roles and writing with other F writers. replies slowly (once or twice per week), but is quick with OOC. engages in lots of headcanoning and planning for rps. wants to feel love&worry for your ocs bc that's how you'll feel about my crazy darlings (i love imperfect, twisted, flawed OCs). fine with dead-dove & darker themes, specifics like limits/triggers can be discussed in dms.

what i'm looking for 》 an enthusiastic collab partner!! my rp copium is communication, so let's fangirl together!! gimme headcanons, pinboards, properly detailing the rp, character dissection, sharing tiktoks, analysis, character&dynamic building - i love all that, so let's do it all!... ideally, i'd love a fellow novella rper, mxf pairing, preferably another f writer.

this is unashamedly a plot call for my beloved rambly writers. i can plan & write for pages, partners who give the same energy back and CONTRIBUTE have my heart. my policy is that i will give as good as i get, so if i'm providing pages of ideas and getting nothing but one-word replies in return, then my interest will die. please try to have a similar energy to me, and we'll get on so well!!

my current tastes lean heavily into 》 dark romance, halloween-inspired rps, supernatural inklings, dark academia, gothic vibes, and various other macabre themes. including, but not limited to: graveyards, murder mystery, torment, mind games/mindbreaking, ghosts, insanity, entrapment, psychedelic darkness, insanity & reverence. enemies-to-lovers trope. childhood friends trope. sinfulness, warped ideations, distorted self-image, and god-complexes, hallucinations, manipulating & rewriting one's reality, gaslighting, and just all those darker themes. preference for including characters like arsonists, former cultists, serial killers, delusional individuals, and twisted characters. settings that are decaying buildings/small towns, drowning in epithets of graveyards, churches, and mystery.

if interested, like this ad & i'll get back to you asap <3.

like if interested!

[queenofbaws]

an old one from me,

14, 17, 20, and 25 for Book of Retribution because I'm obsessed with it (and the favorite line of mine for 14 is "How does it feel to be on the other side for once?")

!!!!! oh my GOSH!!! talk about a blast from the past!!! i would love a little stroll down memory lane, hehehe!!!

14. My favorite line from this fic was [xyz]. What inspired it?

ahhhh, i love that that line resonated with you - i felt sooo slick writing it, way back when!

so!!! as this was a silent hill crossover, i was really, really trying to capture the idea of the town (or in this case, world) using the protagonist's inner turmoil against them. "how does it feel to be on the other side for once?" was absolutely meant to sort of twist the knife in the sense that it alluded back to the experiments done by the RG crew - they were the ones in charge back then, they were the ones pulling the strings and doing horrible things to people...so now, pray tell, how does it feel to be tormented in return?

as we later come to find out, it's a line that's probably mostly meant for zexion.............but that doesn't mean it doesn't apply to anyone else ;)c

17. What was the hardest scene to write?

any! of! the! combat! scenes!!!!!!!!! the fight with zexion in particular, i remember just. staring at my screen like "how on earth do i go about this?!" dsklfjskldjf straight up-and-down action scenes have always been difficult for me, i find it hard to write that sort of thing without it reading like "then he punched him. it hurt. a lot. it hurt, like, a lot. so he punched him back." any time one of the basement boys found themselves facing off a monster (or one another, heheheheheheheee), there was definitely a very, very exasperated and self-conscious struggle involved on my part.

20. What is something you wish more people noticed about this fic?

hmmmmmmmm...well, since it IS a silent hill crossover, i for sure poured the symbolism on thick, let me tell you sldkfjksd oooh i wish i could be more specific than that, but i wrote this puppy several computers ago, so i'm sure my original drafts and outlines are lost to time 😔 the monster designs specifically i remember spending sooo much time on, trying to line up as many sneaky little details as i could to make them line up with my hcs of the guards, ansem, and just zexion/ienzo's inner struggles in general. the use of a doppelganger as an antagonist, too, was SUPER pointed but i feel sort of fell by the wayside - i was trying to be so smooth like "get it? get it, because you...you can't...you can't trust...the schemer......you...do you get it??????"

but again, like i said with an earlier fic, the fact people read this story at all meant - and continues to mean!!! - the absolute WORLD, so regardless of what my intentions were when i was writing it, i'm just touched and flattered and honored that others got something out of it! <3

25. Is there anything you would change now about this fic? Why or why not?

i'm sure i could change......most things. about this fic. now. hahahaha, but not because i hate it or anything!!! BoR is an interesting study, imo, because it really sort of...marked the beginning of the end of my time writing kh stuff, and the beginning of me REALLY focusing on horror more generally. a lot of the spooky stuff i was experimenting with in there feels pretty...idk unrefined to me now??? if that makes sense???

i think it comes down to the fact i've just kind of evolved as a writer over the years, and that the way i approach psychological horror now is very different to then, when i was taking my first tentative steps into the genre. but you'll notice i said i COULD change things - not that i WOULD. BoR was and is, like i said, suuuuuuuuuch an important piece in my heart, and even if i do feel those little 'omg i can't believe this was how i used to write' cringes when rereading some sections of it, i wouldn't change any of it for the world!

[witchcraftandburialdirt]

-For muns with multiple muses, past and present, on any blog.

Rules: Fill out the form according to which muse suits each title best. (The same muse can have multiple titles.) Repost and tag. Feel free to add more!

Tagged by: @astrxae ((Thank you! ♥ Tagging: I'm SUPER late replying to this so I'm not sure who hasn't been tagged in this? But @bells-of-black-sunday as a PRECAUTION

Favourite Muse: ---On this blog: Robibi: I love deep diving into the psychological torment of his existence, and how weird he is. Just enough off putting to be strange but not enough to cause any issues.

Most Character Development: ---On this blog: Robibi, but I think that's expected. If we're talking in total, Yoriichi; he's my beloved best boy and I will rant about him for hours if given the chance. There is a lot of lore built around him.

Trash Muse: ---On this blog: Abel, he's a bastard and I hope he knows it. Most of my OCs fall into a fairly gray category, but I'll say Sylas (an oc of mine not the league champ) is a pretty horrible person so. Maybe him?

The Meme-Lord: ---I'd say either Modern! Robin or Haruko, both are pretty funny when the chance comes, but I think Robibi is so fucking hilarious when he gets the opportunity to be.

Most Likely to Start a War: ---Abel.

Worst Personality: ---Abel.

Best Singer: ---Robin! He actually has a pleasant singing voice: Check it out!

Most Attractive Muse: ---Haruko, he's a relatively normal guy and is very pretty.

Biggest Heart: ---Brain wants to say Haru since I know Robibi can be rather cold in regards to some things? But then I think of how gentle and loving Robin can be so...! MM.

Falls in Love Quickest: ---None of them fall fast, but I think Haru would have the easiest time falling in love since he isn't some trauma-repressed revived dude or a demon.

Most Likely to Drop Their Phone in the Toilet: ---Modern! Robin.

Ice Ruler: ---Robin or Abel.

The Edgelord: ---I don't think any of them are particularly edgy themselves, like sure Robin has his soliloquies but 99% of the times when he's talking to himself its funny? Abel however...

Most Tragic Backstory: ---Robin, while not particularly wild, still very sad.

Best Case of Puberty: ---Abel, Haru is hot yeah but Abel went from a shapeless demonic mass into a 6'5" tall suave mobster who can swing dance. I THINK the choice is obvious.

Most Awkward: ---Modern! Robin

Busy Bee: ---Modern! Robin

Most Clueless: ---Haru: he ignores all drama unless it involves him or Tarhos.

Most Likely to Forget Their Wallet at Home: ---Canon Robin, his memory has declined quite a bit and he would forget a wallet since it isn't part of his usual attire, he'd just forget it existed.

Best Dressed: ---Abel for formal, for street fashion: Haruko.

Biggest Flirt: ---Abel; no morals over here.

Most Dramatic: ---Robin, all verses; his manner of speech just lends so well to this, and its hilarious.

Least Likely to Show Up Late: ---Modern! Robin, he has his pocket watch ready to go! Canon Robin as well once his memory gets a little better.

One with Weirdest Habit: ---Robin and his weird magic.

Most Likely to Be Caught at the Gym: Modern! Robin or Haruko. Haru is more likely to be caught rockclimbing while Modern! Robin would be more focused on kick boxing/strength training; he has some muscles in modern AU-- he can even lift Jhin and Danny!