#I'm! new to tumblr idk how anything works :) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kaysungshine · 4 months ago

Text

Redamancy ['red-a-man-sE] noun ;a love returned in full

Part II out now!

{ Pairing } - idol!bangchan x staff!afab.reader (with a hint of bestfriend!jisung?)

{ Genre } - NSFW, the trifecta (s/a/f), frenimies to friends to lovers? idk but we'll get there in the end

{ Synopsis } - Han Jisung is your new bestie & technical colleague, of course you befriended the rest of his members. Group nights became a tradition, & tonight involves liquor and drinking games for the first time. Truth or drink?

{ WC } - 6.7k

{ Warnings & tags } - 18+ MDNI, NSFW, smut, angst, fluff, drinking, breath play (choking), swearing, dry humping, use of 'babygirl', mention of wet dream, talk of edging, talk of domming, talk of choking, talk of exhibitionism, all of ot8 is suggestive af when they drink, reader and jisung are PLATONIC I promise they're just touchy, they're all giggly drunks so overuse of laughing chuckling and giggling, chan is kinda dumb in this he just... is in denial land but we'll find out more about that later, unrealistic work scenarios, unrealistic dorm setup? idk lol

{ Disclaimer } - This work is in no way associated with the actual skz, and is a fictional piece. I DO NOT own Stray Kids, this fic is just influenced by them!

{ A/N } - Okay I know I took forever to post & this intro is hella long & I'm sorry! Once again, I will say this is my first skz fic. I come from the world of AO3 & dramione. I am out of my comfort zone lol. First time posting stories on tumblr too! So if I missed anything please let me know <3 there will be a part 2, I've already started writing it! The plot is weak af, but gimme a few more stories and I'll find my groove. Promise! Unbeta'd, be gentle with me ♡

It was supposed to be a relatively chill Saturday night, so you were excited. You just got off work, and had arrived at Jisung's. He swung the door open smiling and pulled you inside, into an immediate hug. Everyone said their greetings, and then Jisung went immediately to whining.

"Finally, what kept you so late?"

You took your shoes, mask, sunglasses, and hat off, letting your curls fall down your back. Then you unzipped your sweatshirt, shrugging it off your shoulders and exposing your fitted white tee. You gave your jacket and bag to Ji so he could put them away. You always arrived in 'disguise', in baggy clothing so that no one suspected anything. Though you thought it was ridiculous. It doesn't matter how baggy the sweat pants or hoodie is, there's no hiding the curve of your ass.

You were a content editor at JYPE, and had become really good friends with Han Jisung. Friendships between idols and staff certainly aren't forbidden, in fact they're encouraged to an extent... as long as no lines are crossed. But it's pretty much an ignored rule. Anyways, you were a small 'behind-the-scenes' employee, not a manager or assistant or makeup artist. Not anyone directly involved with any idols. No one off the street knew who you were. Still, over the last almost year or so, you and him became besties. You frequently shared meals together at work, had sleepovers, you even went camping. You were basically glued to each other. It could easily be taken the wrong way by the media and fans. Hell, it gets taken the wrong way by co-workers, other idols, and even his group members. Although they've mostly accepted that's not the case. It's a given with the way you two act though.

Your relationship is definitely platonic, confirming pretty early on that neither of you felt anything more than friendly love for each other. But you both love teasing the other suggestively. You suppose that's partly why you two got so close so quickly. Your personalities are so similar, it's like you share the same singular brain cell sometimes.

"Editing, per usual." You finally reply with a sigh, "We had to cut A LOT out of nexz's new video. They're so high energy, they slip up a lot, especially with the swearing, but nothing we can't handle."

"Gotta love kids." Chan snorts while sipping a beer.

You smile awkwardly in response and look around the room. Everyone is here, all with their preferred beverages, and chatting away or scrolling.

Ji comes back with a drink for you, he knows you're partial to tequila and always keeps it on deck. Normally, you spend every weekend you can together, which sometimes is not as often as either of you would like. Sometimes you'd both head back to your place, and just have all nighters, binge watching anime and gorging yourselves on junk food. More recently, like tonight, you get invited over to hang with him and the rest of the boys.

It usually results in a few drinks and a movie, or talk about work. Sometimes you just play music and talk and vibe, or try to cook food together when you get the munchies... Which more than likely results in Minho taking over because he just can't help himself. However the nights play out, they're always fun, and you're gradually getting closer to the rest of the members too. Although no one can compare to the bond you have with your Jiji.

"I don't wanna watch a movie tonight, my eyes hurt too much." He starts complaining.

"Poor baby." You tease and run your fingers through his hair, laughing.

"When are you two just going to come out with the fact that you're in love?" Seungmin asks.

You roll your eyes, "When dwaekki's fly."

"I can easily make that happen." Changbin laughs.

"We could play a game?" Felix suggests, already looking flushed from the alcohol.

Jeongin gets excited, "Let's do a drinking game! It's been a while."

"I don't believe I've ever played a drinking game with y'all."

Hyunjin hums, "Mm, you haven't. Mostly because we get crazy, we've never brought up the idea."

This piqued your interest, "More crazy than I've already seen? I don't think that's possible."

Minho chimes in this time, "You forget we're a group of men sometimes, I swear. Mix alcohol and suggestive games, it definitely gets 'crazier' than you've seen, inappropriately crazy."

You level him with a smirk, "I'm down."

"That's my y/n!" Ji says, while pulling you to sit in his lap, "Fearless."

You giggle and lean into him while Minho just narrows his eyes at you and purses his lips. Something tells you he's up to something, but you're ready for any challenge.

"Fine. Then we'll play something easy, truth or drink. If someone refuses to answer, they drink. Whoever finishes their drink first loses." Minho says.

"What does the loser have to do?" You ask.

"Pay for everyone's lunch every day for a month!" Changbin says.

"Deal." You say.

You're an open book, Ji knows this. There's no question you won't answer.

Everyone is up now, getting new drinks & refills before the game starts. You can't help but notice that Chan didn't get up, he looks a little nervous for some reason. He was always the most worried about you being around so much. In the beginning it definitely came across like he didn't like you. Now you know that's not the case... you think. He tolerates you now to say the least. You couldn't blame him too much, he was just protective of his boys. You actually found it incredibly sweet, or maybe it's just that stupid soft spot you have for him.

He always tried to keep you at arms length from the group. Not wanting anyone to get too close to you. Until Jisung put him in his place, as best he could anyways.

You were in Ji's lap, watching Spirited Away. He was drawing imaginary lines and shapes on your back, while you rested your head on his shoulder, facing the tv. His head was resting on top of yours as well, and a blanket covered you both.

Chan walked in seeing this, and nearly had a stroke. He said we were being inappropriate. And specifically made it a point to tell you to be more professional as a member of the staff. Short version: know your fucking place, you're overstepping.

You scoffed at him, prepared to confront him about his growing disdain towards you. Let him know he's the one being inappropriate, downright childish. But Ji nudged you onto the couch and got to him first.

It was kind of cute watching him standing there, ears becoming red and getting in Chan's face. Cute in the way that it was like a maltese puppy trying to stand up to a doberman. Then he proceeded to yell at him about how he was way out of line. Saying he was being flat out disrespectful and that he was done with the ridiculous way he has been acting about you. The last thing he said was that he didn't know what got into him, and that he'd never seen this side of Chan before.

Chan was silent, looking intensely into Jisungs eyes. But he never backed down, so Chan poked his tongue to his cheek, then retreated to his room for the whole night. You had to scoop Ji off the floor right afterwards. He had let his knees buckle, and fell to the floor once Chan was gone. Citing that he wasn't sure he was going to live through the night to see the morning sun. Typical dramatic fashion for your best friend. But you soothed him, fluffing up his ego about 'defending your honor'. His words, not yours.

As that night went on though, the tiniest bit of worry coursed through you. Chan hadn't come back out. Not even when the other members came home, trying to knock on his door to greet him. Or when the food was ready to be served, you had even given knocking a try. Only after Hyunjin begged you to, because 'He already doesn't take care of himself. He needs to eat.' No, you didn't see him again that night until you had already walked out the front door. He slipped out behind you shortly after, grabbing you by the wrist and stopping you.

You thought he was going to continue the argument for a moment, but no, he was apologizing. Not much more was said afterwards, but his apology was genuine and heartfelt, so you accepted it. You two ended up hugging it out, and thank goodness no one saw that, because it was incredibly cringeworthy. He had no more major issues after that. But he was still unexplainably awkward around you, but it's not like you were any better. You two simply didn't know how to interact with each other for longer than 30 seconds. And that was pushing it. You suspected that might not ever go away. He likes to keep his walls high and strong, and you're stubborn at times.

But of course, despite that stubbornness. You developed some sort of feelings towards him. Feelings you refused to acknowledge, well tried to refuse. You would push those feelings down deep within your heart, put them in a little box, and tape it shut trying to forget it's there. There was no need to pine over the man, he had stay to do that for him, and who knows who else in his life. Somehow that box always ended up ripped open again.

There was never a reason to act on these feelings. Not to mention, you think you'd be breaking SO MANY rules. Putting your job, his job, hell everyone's job at risk. Or worse, making a fool of yourself when he would downright reject you.

You keep watching him, now he's shaking his leg up and down, seeming agitated. Maybe he just doesn't want everyone getting into a vulnerable state of mind while playing? Maybe he's worried somebody will say or do something wrong? That someone will cross a line, as he loves to say?

Trying to ease his negative feelings, and extend yet another olive branch. You toss a throw pillow at him, hitting him in the chest and pulling him out of his thoughts.

He looks at you, eyebrows wrinkled in confusion, and you just chuckle nervously at him saying, "Don't worry, it's like Vegas. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas."

"God how fuckin' corny was that?" Ji teases you, poking your side making you giggle more.

To your relief, Chan is laughing with you, and shaking his head, "I just want them to behave."

"Oh relax, we're all grown. We're all friends. So we'll get to know each other more intimately, big whoop." You shrug.

"Mmm..." He replied, before raising his voice so everyone could hear him, "Whatever is spoken about tonight, doesn't leave this room."

"I swear you're the one with anxiety sometimes, not me." Ji mumbles.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah... dad." Hyunjin says as he sits next to you and Ji.

"As if that announcement even had to be made, I swear, and you wonder why we call you old." Seungmin comments.

Once everyone is settled in with their drinks, Minho directs Chan to start the game.

"Jisung, when was the last time you cried?"

He laughed, "You're trying to embarrass me because you know it was this morning, but I am confident and secure in the fact that I am a sensitive man."

He said the last bit with his hand over his heart, and his eyes closed, effectively making everyone chuckle.

"My poor baby, why were you crying?" You question teasingly.

"Please don't bring it up, he'll start blubbering all over again. Stupid, sad, dog rescue videos." Seungmin mumbles.

"Minho!" Ji shouts, pointing at him dramatically, "This question is for you. If you had to kiss someone in this room on the cheek, who would it be?"

"Hyunjin." He said bluntly, making you and everyone else laugh while Hyune just rolled his eyes.

"Would you kiss me back?" He asked him, eyes full of hope and bottom lip jutted out and pouting, trying to act cute. And succeeding, honestly.

Hyunjin acted like he was pondering the question, but ultimately was the first to take a sip from his glass, "I decline to answer."

He looked to you next, a suggestive smirk on his face, making you the next victim, "Y/niiieee..."

"Oi, be respectful." Chan scolds immediately, not liking the look at all.

"All I was going to do was repeat the question!" He said defensively, "Y/n, if you had to choose, who would you kiss on the cheek?"

You tried hard to keep your eyes from trailing over to Chan, a tingly feeling spreading across your skin at the mere thought of innocently kissing his cheek. Instead you chose the easy answer, because it wasn't a lie. You'd also kiss your best friend on the cheek any time.

"My Jiji of course," And you took his face in one hand, squeezing his cheeks between your middle finger and thumb, and plant a loud smooch on each of them, "he probably only asked because he wanted one anyways."

He just chuckles, letting you baby him and Seungmin fake gags.

"Minnieee..." You pause trying to come up with a question, "when you dye your hair next, what color would you want?"

"Green, my entire head green."

"That would look interesting." You laugh.

You all go 'round in circles for a few rounds, completely forgetting about the rules of the game. Having now finished your glasses from casually sipping throughout the game, most of you have switched to occasional shots. You're starting to feel warm and tipsy. Of course the more you all drank, the more the questions started to get more... amorous. Which is exactly how you all assumed this game would go. No wonder Chan was so anxious.

However looking over to him now, he's definitely having a good time. Like every other person, he loosens up while drinking, but tonight he seems even more so.

"Y/n," Chan starts with a sly look making your skin buzz again. Among all of you, he is 100% the most inebriated right now, "when was your first kiss?"

"Yah! He tells us to be respectful, but look how he is after a few drinks!" Changbin yells laughing.

Chan loses it, "You're right Binnie, you don't have to answer or drink." He says in between fits of squeaky laughter.

You think you could listen to him laugh all day.

You shake your head and snort, "I've answered worse questions playing this game before. I was 13 when I had my first kiss."

Hyunjin nearly spits his drink out, because again, no one is drinking just as punishment anymore, "13?!"

"Well, yeah, it's a pretty normal age in America... I think..." you started to blush, "why, how old were you?" you ask Hyunjin.

He hesitates, but eventually he spoke, "I was 18."

The rest chime in saying they were also 18 or 19. With the exception of Felix who said he was 16.

Without even thinking you start to say, "Aaah, see I was 18 when I-" and you're abruptly stopped with Ji's hand slapping over your mouth.

Your eyes go wide, caught off guard, but understanding as you almost blurted out unnecessary information. Nothing that Ji hadn't known obviously, it's just that everyone else doesn't really know you on that level.

"Jagi, you only had to answer the one question, adding extra info, that's not how you play the gaaaaame." He says in a sing-song voice, "Hyunjin it's your turn to ask someone."

"No no no no! What was she going to say?" Chan chuckles.

When you looked at him, he winked at you, and you had to stop yourself from going limp in Ji's arms. He knew damn well what you were going to say. Why is he teasing, no torturing you like this?

You peel Ji's hand off your mouth to respond "It's not your turn, you'll have to wait to ask me that."

The group starts laughing and shouting, teasing Chan who is ignoring it all, just staring at you with curious eyes and his tongue in his cheek. Does he know how hot he looks doing that?

"Okay, so then I'll ask you. What were you going to say?" Hyunjin asks calmly, trying to fight the smile off his face.

You pour yet another shot, and knock it back thinking, what the hell, "I was going to say I was 18 when I first hooked up with a man."

Some members looked surprised, the game taking an obvious turn. However Hyunjin, Felix, and Chan started laughing again.

"I knew that's what you were going to say." Felix slurred.

"Yeah I was definitely teasing you on that, because I knew." Chan followed.

"Mmm, well judging from the shocked faces of everyone else, you two seem to be the only psychics." You try to joke, wanting the attention off of you suddenly.

"No, don't get us wrong, not all of us are as innocent as you think." Seungmin says defensively.

"Oh really now?" You respond, one brow quirking up.

Seungmin just turned red, and sat back in his seat. To which Chan started laughing, yet again. He's a giggly drunk, and you love it.

"Don't tease my puppy, babe." Ji slurred, trying to reach his arm to console Seungmin, but ultimately failing.

"I mean I was 18 too, with the same girl I first kissed." Hyunjin shrugged.

"But what do you mean 'to a man'?" Jeongin asked with a shit eating grin on his face.

You promptly turned into a tomato, and started choking on air.

"You're not that slow pabo, obviously it means she's been with women too." Ji says, rather loudly and speaking freely, all while patting your back.

You're quiet. It's not like it's a secret, you've never hidden your sexuality. But it never came up in conversation with anyone here, except Jisung.

Wanting to ease the tone, Felix speaks up, "Well I was 18 when I first hooked up with a dude."

"I was 21, but everyone already knows that story." Ji slurred.

The whole conversation triggers another group laughing fit. Except for Chan, who is looking at you with those dark eyes again. And... is he blushing? Or is that the alcohol? He eventually snaps out of whatever daze he was in, and slowly smiles at you reassuringly.

You mentally kick yourself for getting your hopes up, of course he couldn't ever think of you like that. You're imagining things.

"But then, how old were you when you first hooked up with a girl?" Jeongin asked again, genuinely curious.

"A lot younger than 18..." You trailed off laughing, "I'll just say in high school."

"The air is different outside of Korea." Changbin says suddenly, sounding thoughtful.

Hyunjin nearly collapsed laughing, slapping Minho on the knee repeatedly, despite the glare he was shooting him.

"Well I just answered a bunch of questions in a row so that means I get to ask two people a question. And the second person I ask gets the next turn." You say, making up new rules.

"So... Chan." He looks at you with his eyebrows raised and you just smirk, knowing you're trying to get back at him, "How old were YOU when you lost your virginity?"

He gulps and looks around at the group before answering, "I... was 18."

"Chan-hyung, you never answered us when we would ask you! Why answer her?" Jisung whines.

"I honestly don't know, maybe it's the liquor. None of you ever asked me drunk." He starts giggling.

"Okay so question 2... Binnie!" He gulps and looks at you with wide eyes, "Are you more of a boob guy?" You say grabbing your own, not even really thinking about it, "Or an ass guy?"

Changbin started laughing and answered, "Definitely ass, but I appreciate boobs too, equality."

"I am just learning so much about my fellow members lately." Seungmin whispers.

"Is that a bad thing?" You giggle.

"Not at all, it feels strangely comforting, letting loose like this." He replies and smiles softly at me, "It's been a while."

"It's freeing!" Jeongin yells abruptly, throwing his hands in the air.

"Aye, my question is for you then Min. Have you ever had a wet dream?" Changbin asks.

"... what guy hasn't? Don't all guys get them?" He asks looking around.

Then you chime in again frankly, "Girls can get them too you know."

Why does it feel like you've opened pandora's box on your sex life, in every single aspect?

Ji starts laughing, nodding his head vigorously and you know where this is about to go.

"Really now?" Felix says, mimicking your exact tone from earlier, "What was it about?"

"Mmmm... it's not your turn to ask," Then you turn to Seungmin, "And if you ask me, I will absolutely drink and not answer. No way I'm explaining a sex dream right now."

Seungmin just rolls his eyes and huffs out a laugh.

"But I wanna knooooooow," Jisung whines, "You looked so cute having one last weekend, you never told me what it was about."

Everyone was watching you two closely now, waiting to hear how he knew what you looked like in that situation.

You turned around and smacked his arm, "We weren't going to mention that ever again! Remember?!" You attempt to be angry, but you can't help it and end up smiling.

"Okay, well now I'm curious since you two are bringing this up." Minho says with a glint in his eye.

"Y/n may or may not have had one when I slept over, and I woke up to her moaning and hump--"

This time it was your turn to slap a hand over his mouth, "Jiji, Sungie, my love, my sweet sweet SWEET best friend. I don't want to kill you, but I will." You say in a dulcet tone.

He raised his hands, eyes wide and nodded his head. You couldn't help but laugh, apparently you're a giggly drunk too.

Out of the corner of your eye, you swore you saw Chan adjusting himself in his pants. But then you reminded yourself that it was just wishful thinking and an alcohol induced hallucination. Horny hallucination. God you needed to get over him and under someone else. This unrequited shit wasn't for you.

"I'm so never going to drop this you know, I wanna know what the hell happened." Minho smirked at you, to which you flipped him off jokingly.

It's Seungmin's turn next, and he's just staring at Jeongin with a blank face, "Have you ever had a one night stand?"

He pauses for a moment and then finally answers, "No, I haven't."

He looked at you now, asking his question, "You know what I have to ask now, right?"

"Go ahead." You challenge, fully prepared to choke down another shot and not answer his question, and he smiles.

"What's one of your kinks?"

You were unprepared for that question. And how could you know he would ask that, these men like to fuck around with your head.

"Relax, I just wanted to see your reaction." He says before chuckling.

You glared at him for a moment, halfheartedly. They think they can just retract questions when they get scared that they went too far. Screw that, you're answering.

"I guess the most simple one I have is edging." You shrug.

"The most simple one?!" Hyunjin asked.

"What are you a masochist? Edging is the worst, feels like torture to me." Ji says.

"But the build up is so delicious, and the end result is so worth it. It's so intense." Felix chimes in, "Choking too, that can be intense."

"Hm, breath play might actually be my favorite." You admit.

"Damn y/n." Ji says, eyeing you with a smile, "You're full of surprises, even to this day."

You shrug again, "Everyone has different kinks... What's one of yours?" You ask him.

He ponders for a moment, "I like being dommed sometimes."

"Big surprise." Minho says and you all laugh.

"Good one though," You nod, "That's one of mine too."

"I think I'm an exhibitionist, to an extent of course." Hyunjin says next.

"That's also not a surprise." Minho replies.

You can't help but let your eyes wander over to Chan again, while everyone else is sharing different things they're into in bed. The liquor has everyone speaking loosely. But Chan doesn't seem to care about it anymore.

You find him staring right back at you, that same look in his eyes from earlier, and you feel heat spread in your stomach, and wetness starts to pool in your panties. Maybe you weren't imagining things.

But you don't notice that Ji's observing both of you in his drunken haze. Not too faded to ignore you and Chan eye-fucking each other.

Your heart starts racing the longer you hold eye contact, and you start shifting uncomfortably on his lap, before looking away and deciding to get up.

"Alright... I need some bread to soak up this alcohol, and then I need to get home because it's already 2 in the morning." You say with a shaky breath.

"Yeah, I'm wasted right now," Jeongin says and stands, "Bed's a good idea. Goodnight everyone." And he leaves to his room.

Ji grabs your wrist, preventing you from moving, "You're not going anywhere. We're all drunk, you can't drive and no one can bring you back home."

"Fiiiiiiine," You say, "but I still want bread."

"You and your bread fixation whenever you drink." Minho mumbles, heading to the kitchen anyways to grab you some.

When he comes back he hands it to you and you start munching away happily, doing a little dance.

Meanwhile, Felix is trying to tug Chan's arms to make him stand up, but he's fighting him on it and whining. Clearly he exceeded his limit tonight drinking. He probably won't even remember the looks he was giving you, you think.

"I don't wanna go to bed." Chan whines.

Felix finally succeeds in pulling him up, "C'mon mate, you definitely need to sleep this off. You'll be miserable tomorrow. Let's get you some water too, hmm?"

Chan reluctantly holds his arm, and follows him down the hall, stumbling over his own two feet along the way. You can't help but laugh at the sight.

More of the boys say goodnight and head off to their rooms, but Ji and Minho stay with you in the living room, chatting a little longer before bed.

Ji starts going through his bags, determined that you left some pajamas here from when you slept over previously, and he kept them in a bag to give back to you. He pulls out the nightie, that you honestly forgot you brought here. But you see why you didn't ever wear it at the time. It's dark green, spaghetti straps and has lace along the bust line. It also has slits on each side of your thigh, and only covers you to the middle of your thighs. Your go to sleepware was always nighties or large tees, they're comfortable and sometimes you get hot at night. Mix in the fact that you were drinking tonight? You're already feeling overheated. But wearing this?

"Jiiiiiii, don't you have any t-shirts I can wear?" You whine.

He's already under the covers, fighting sleep, "Sorry babe... haven't done laundry... Nothing clean..."

You whine again before taking it and heading across the hall into one of the bathrooms. It was this or sleep in your sweats, and that idea sounded entirely too suffocating to you.

You slip the nightie on and brush your teeth with your designated toothbrush you had there. Jisungs idea, after you had too much tequila one night and he diligently held your hair back as you got sick.

You sigh as you're leaving, and make your way towards Ji's room. Before you reach the door though, Chan walks out of his room. He's in a black tank top, and red boxer briefs... your eyes immediately trail down and go wide. His outline clear as day. But you change your view quickly, hopefully before he notices.

It doesn't help though, now all you're doing is eyeing his arms, the muscles cut throughout them. The veins that trail all the way down to his hands. God, his hands... What wouldn't you let those hands do to you...

He scratches the back of his head, and the movement snaps you out of your gaze. You find him staring back at you for a second before answering, "Sorry, I'll just..."

You start to shake your head, "No, no. No reason to apologize." You chuckle and start shifting on your feet. You feel the skirt of your nightie swaying with you. It opened the slit wider, and Chan immediately looked down at your exposed thigh. He inhaled quietly, sucking in air through his nose.

Any other day, you'd be scrambling to cover yourself. Feeling insecure and too bare. You don't know if it was the liquor in you, but tonight? Being on display? It turned you on.

You clenched your thighs together, almost involuntarily, and Chan didn't miss that.

Time seemed to be moving too slow. He stepped towards you, nearly closing the gap between you. He's only inches away, and looking down on you. His eyes have that dark, smoldery look again. He raised his hand and brushed the curls off your face and behind your ear. When he rests his palm against your cheek, your eyes flutter shut and you lean into his touch. It's so warm, and comforting. As if it was always meant for you.

When you open your eyes, you can clearly see the lust in his is only growing. He's not holding it back anymore, biting his lip as he stares at you. You almost whimper in anticipation.

"This is your opportunity to walk away if you're not okay with me kissing you." He says lowly.

You closed your eyes, and his lips met yours. The first few seconds were sweet and soft. Almost too innocent for the heat of the moment, but then he deepened it. He was pulling you by the waist into him, running his hands down and resting them on your ass. You could easily feel how hard he was for you, even through the thin fabrics. This time you let the whimper out, and he swiped his tongue along your bottom lip before sucking it into his mouth. When you tried to do the same, he didn't give you the chance. Instead he slipped his tongue in. It was like he was lost in desire, and greedy for more. You couldn't help it when your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.

He groaned and started backing you into the wall, his lips never leaving yours. He grabbed your thighs in each hand, and hoisted you up, slotting himself between them. Your legs naturally wrapped around him, and he started rocking his length against you. His pace was achingly slow, but still delicious.

You moaned and slipped a hand up to the nape of his neck, grabbing a fistful of hair. He breaks the kiss and throws his head back with his eyes closed. He half hisses, half groans, and you can't help but rock your hips against him harder, hoping to hear more. He grips your thigh tighter, and leans down to press a quick kiss to your neck, before licking and sucking on it. He's meeting each roll of your hips with rough thrusts. And even clothed, you feel how perfectly he's rubbing your clit.

Your head is so clouded with need. Need to be touched. Need to touch him. Need to feel him inside of you. You don't even think twice when he glides his hand up your stomach, and over your breasts. He gives one a light squeeze before moving up to wrap his fingers around your neck, and your brain loses all sense for a moment.

He's just resting his hand there, but you wish he'd do more. You're not sure if this man knows just how pliant you are for him right now.

Then he brings his lips to your ear and whispers, "Can I touch you?"

His warm breath gives you chills, and you nod your head as best as you can. But that doesn't suffice him, he stops his movements against you and his grip around your throat tightens. You think you could probably get off on it if he tightens his fingers just a bit more, but he doesn't, instead he says, "I'm going to need words, babygirl."

Your hips buck into him, and you breathe out a quiet "Yes. Please..."

With that, he yanks your face closer to his by your neck. He's squeezing ever so slightly tighter around your throat. He bites your lip and you groan. But he's quick to silence you with his tongue.

Letting go, he trailed his hand back down your body and to your core. Slowly he started to rub you through the thin lace. You were so sensitive, that when he found your clit and pressed a circle into it. You couldn't help but breathe out his name. He pushed your panties to the side, and when he felt you for the first time you felt him smile against your lips.

"Babygirl... fuck, you're so wet for me."

And as he whispered that, he slipped a finger in you. He set a steady pace, dragging against your walls with a curl. Each pump hitting your sweet spot, and the heel of his hand creating delightful friction against your swollen bud. His breathing was heavy in your ear, breaking through all your helpless whimpering. When he added a second finger, you couldn't hold back anymore.

"Chan..." You moaned louder this time, while simultaneously letting your head drop against the wall with a thud.

He pulled his lips off of you, eyes wide when he met yours. He started blinking as if he was coming back to reality. When he looked into your eyes again, he looked startled.

"What's wrong?" You pant, feeling hot and dizzy, wishing he would keep moving his hands.

Instead, he quickly slips his fingers out of you, and sets your feet on the floor. Then he backs away.

"I'm sorry, y/n... I don't know what came over me, that was incredibly inappropriate and out of character." Chan mumbled.

Your heart sinks, as you feel the sting of rejection. Tears threatened to well in your eyes, and you immediately felt the oncoming headache from holding them back. You shouldn't feel so emotional and upset. This was all spur of the moment. But you do, you feel devastated.

Regardless, you clear your throat, "I understand." You force an unsettling chuckle out, when a sob threatens to escape instead.

He puts on a blank face that feels so cold, and responds with "Don't forget to drink some water, stay hydrated... I'll be heading to bed now, you should too."

All you really want to say is don't leave, because you want to finish what was started. Because you've wanted this for so long. Because the box you kept away in the depths of your heart had ripped open once again. And all the languished emotions were here, front and center, aching to bear it all to him. To let him see. Confess. But that would be selfish, he's clearly uncomfortable with it all. He probably regrets it. An alcohol induced affair. In his eyes, a complete mistake.

So instead you say, "Okay."

Because that's all you can muster before the tears start to fall. You turn away, going back to facing Ji's door.

"Goodnight y/n... Sleep well." He says, and puts a tentative hand on your shoulder.

You shrug it off, and escape to Ji's bedroom. To your surprise he's sitting up in bed, and ushering you come to him with his arms open and bottom lip pouted out.

You run to him, a bit dramatically and fall a part in his arms. But you can't help it, you sealed these emotions away for too long. You were too hurt at the moment to even try pushing them back down.

Jisung is your life saver, he's comforting you, rubbing his fingers on your scalp and rocking you back and forth to try and calm you. He gives you time before you have to explain why exactly you're having a melt down.

"Chan's an idiot." He finally says.

And you lean back to look at him, confused on how quickly he's put two and two together.

"Well you weren't exactly quiet. Between your exaggerated moans and his animalistic grunting right outside my door, of course I heard it." He rolled his eyes jokingly and that earned a laugh from you.

You smacked him lightly, "I was lost in the moment... don't judge me."

"Jagi..." He says, and wipes the tears from your cheeks with his thumbs, "You've liked him for so much longer than a moment."

Your heart starts pounding faster again. How could he know that. It's the one thing you've kept from him, from everyone, hell you even denied it to yourself for as long as possible. Was it that obvious? Who else knows? You go to speak, fear written across your face.

"No. You were not obvious, in fact you're an amazing actor. I'm sure none of the other members noticed, and definitely no one else at work knew." He answers before you can even get words out.

You nod slowly, "So then, how'd you know?"

He smiled proudly, "I'm a people watcher, I see all."

You smack him again, a little harder this time.

"Alright, alright, but I really did see all the looks you'd give him when no one else was watching... I know what longing looks like, and..." he trailed off.

You knew that wasn't all, "And?"

"Aaaaand... maybe that night you had that wet dream. You were moaning his name while humping the pillow..."

"You never told me that!" You shoved your head into your hands, distraught.

"Well I didn't want to embarrass you! I honestly didn't think you looked at any of us that way until then. Like I said, a good actor. I figured you'd tell me when you were ready to."

You sighed, "I'm sorry. It's just a stupid crush, it'll pass."

"You're grown, you don't have to apologize to anyone for liking someone. But y/n," He cupped your cheek forcing you to look at him again, "this isn't just a simple crush, is it?"

With that question, you felt the tears spilling all over again. He pulled you to lay down with him, holding you tight against him and letting you cry it all out. Somewhere between his low humming, and your quiet weeping, you fell asleep.

When you blink the sleep away from your eyes the next morning, you're still entangled with Ji. He's literally wrapped around you like a koala.

You snort out a laugh and go to check the time on your phone. 7:30 am, entirely too early. You decide to try and fall back asleep, but last night's events rush back to you. Dread fills your chest, and your fight or flight kicks in. You're trying to gently escape Ji's hold, and not hyperventilate. The latter is more difficult but, since that man can sleep through anything, you were able to succeed.

You get changed back into your clothes, and leave a note for him saying that you're leaving and you'll text him when you get home. You can't bear to face Chan, let alone anyone else who might've heard you two last night. So you decide to skip out on the usual coffee and breakfast routine. You all have that tradition after a drunken night, but you know Ji will cover for you with everyone anyways.

You're rushing down the hall, wanting to grab your things and head for the door. Panic is starting to bubble over, and you're haphazardly covering yourself up to be unnoticeable. As you're slipping the mask over your face, a voice stops you.

"Morning... don't you want to stay for breakfast?"

You can't bring yourself to look at Chan, those words only setting the box of emotions in your heart on fire. You know he only means it in the way that it is an unbroken tradition. No matter how sick one of you gets, group breakfast is a must for recuperation. No one has skipped it in the months you've been doing it. We all take care of each other. But the idea makes your mouth bitter, because you wish it was just you two. Alone. Making breakfast the morning after earth shattering sex. And the fact he doesn't mean it in that way in the slightest makes tears prick back into your eyes.

Yes, you know you're being petty. You should stick it through for your friends. Take a page from Chan and act like nothing ever happened. You just can't find it inside you to care, you need to go home and lick your wounds before facing anyone here again. Call it childish, but you didn't care.

You're struggling to find words and just blurt out, "No thanks." And rush out the door, heading to the safety of your car.

You left Chan standing there. Unbeknownst to you, hurting just as much.

Special thank you to @jeonginsleftcheek who encouraged me through finishing this! I had finished it, and then accidentally deleted the entire ending. But in turn, that was a good thing I think... because now there'll be a part 2! If you'd like to be added to a taglist, let me know and I'll start one! Feedback is always cherished, but be gentle pleeeeeeeease ♡

2K notes · View notes

the-real-couchrat · 27 days ago

Text

Post ending / rescue AU / recovering Curly is everything to me, so I’m making a list of other people’s posts that feature him. (The links will connect to a reblog of them in case anything ever happens to the original post)

If anyone ever see’s posts like these ones, PLEASE tag me in a reblog!! All posts are welcome, not just art!

Please note that I don’t decide what to add to this list based on shipping, opinions on the metaphors in the game, the accuracy of burn scars, the morality of Curly, or anything else that causes discourse in the fandom. I just add any posts that I come across that include Curly recovering from his injuries in any way. Prosthetics, wheelchair, wig, crutches, It just needs to have him in better shape than when he first got injured.

No NSFW

(Also this post is edited to add new ones when I find them)

Rehabilitated Curly

Party with no Jimmy

Stand around in medbay party (Idk if this counts, but he has prosthetics so I'm saying it does)

Happy abortion!

Post-ending speculation (text)

20 years later (I AM NOT WORTHY TO LOOK UPON THIS WITH MY MERE MORTAL EYES)

ANYA’S GRADUATION DAY

Post ending

Rescue/Recovery AU

My own post! (text)

Aftermath Curly

Good ending

Best way to approach captain’s disability?

A little sketch

They care

“I wouldn’t want to frighten her”

Anya doesn’t quite overdose

They’re safe

Guys rate my fanart

WWI face prosthetics

Less fucked up Curly AU

Fix-it type AU

Silly recovering time

Curly got some gifts for his b-day

Imagine Curly survived (twitter)

Curly with a service dog

I’m not a dog and you’re not a mare

Drawing the dentalcare crew (does this count?)

The quality will not be questioned

Fix-it AU

Want to make Curly some cool new mechanical hands so he can strangle Jimmy

One can dream

He’s got a wig now

Happy ending where they all survive (devianart)

It hurt my heart (twitter)

God forbid I get sick (translated?)

This might be controversial but… (text)

Let’s get you out of the house!

Cyberpunk AU

Cartoons with breakfast

Old-school surgeries (text)

Post-ending fic prompt (text)

Post-rescue AU curlyana

Post-rescue curlyana part two

Why is this goddamn white boy so hard to draw?

Captain stop infodumping the baby

Maybe never forgive

Draw Captain Curly having a prosthetic limb

Curly from Mouthwashing (good ending)

This is how I imagine Curly post OP

whats the worse fate, whatd be better for the tulpar crew

Wip

🐈

Mouthwashing AU (Reddit)

Curly if he survives (Reddit)

My own art

I’ll give him smoochies, prosthetics, and skin grafts

Art dump time✨

Hoppin on da trendin train

The crew built curly a mechanical hand

How to give Captain Curly a voice (idk if this technically counts, but it’s a disability aid so I will)

Doodle of the Tulpar crew post-rescue!

New hyperfixation just dropped

Hi Tumblr. Funny seeing you here

Another rehabilitated Curly

Who up washing they mouth rn

Don’t use the dog buttons (text)

Haunted part one and two

Prosthetics

AU were someone saves them

Mouthwashing doodles

A New Ladder-Reader x Curly (I’ll add the original art videos when I can) (also I didnt read it. if someone did read it, please let me know if it’s SFW)

I know he always have his headphones on

More rehabilitated Curly✨

You guys like this right

Anya, what’s it like working as a medic on a spaceship?

This is how we can still get the good ending

“I’m sorry Anya”

More cringe mouthwashing art be upon thee

Curly’s happy (and recovering) ending

Writing an AU of mouthwashing where the crew survives

Most people seem to be giving him prosthetics…

Doing a bit of study

#mouthwashing #mouthwashing AU #Captain Curly #recovered Curly #healing curly #healing curly mouthwashing #mouthwashing curly #curly mouthwashing #recovering curly #recovering curly mouthwashing

235 notes · View notes

onlyharper · 9 months ago

Text

Please Help A Transwoman Out

Hi folks. I didn't think I'd have to make another one of these and I'm sorry. I don't ask for anything usually. Basically, I just got fired from my job. I had a prior post where I was ill for months and I had to take days off from work. Unfortunately, I got fired from that job for poor work performance because of my health and I'm freaking out. I'm asking for donations and help until my unemployment goes through or gets denied or I get a new job.

I'm honestly thinking of getting a job in town but it's not really safe for a trans woman but I'm really desperate. Any help would be appreciated as I'm unsure how to pay my bills at this time. I'll add my stuff down below. I need money for bills and food. Bills come first as I don't need food really. So that would be really nice. If you can't help, please like and REBLOG. I'm sorry to ask again. I really am. but...I am faltering at this whole living thing and everything this spiraling and I need a way to place my feet on the ground before I become homeless or worse. I've linked my payment things below if you would like to help. I've given nicknames since idk how Tumblr is about this. Cash App has a fake name and other two has my legal name, initials are D.A., so any help would be appreciated.

Payton Pals: harphazardly (Legal Name on this one and a picture of a plush Flareon)

Cashmere Applications: $Generallyalive (Has the name Chuck on it)

Venice Monet: mindnum (Also Legal Name)

859 notes · View notes

knife-eared-jan · 2 months ago

Text

I wanna get over it but I'm actually getting more and more upset the more time passes? I honestly don't want to be, but I feel like I'm grieving for the characters and the world I put my time and love into on most days of a decade now. Like, I really mean daily even if it's not been on Tumblr for the entire time.

For many of us, these characters found us during a really dark time and we don't call them our emotional support characters for nothing. And to have all that history so dismissively handwaved by the devs in their social media posts is actually hurtful as hell on a personal level...

(I get that 117 choices is insane and would take up an unreasonable amount of resources and limit storytelling. But I did expect 8 or 10, even if half of them just lead to codex entries. That would have been fine! I mostly expected that there wouldn't be choices from DAO and DA2 as well, but Inquisition?

How will they even give a throwaway mention to the Inquisitor's romance like they did for Hawke in dialogue in DAI, if you can't even select that Cass is Divine or Bull, Blackwall or Cullen are dead? You can't even say oh they're at home doing this and that. At best romances like Dorian or Josephine will get some content while others get none. At worst the romance choice input is actually just there to ask if you romanced Solas. Yes, I'm hella upset at that even as I am currently obsessed with Solavellan.)

Because most importantly this just makes the whole world of Thedas feel.. idk cold? Knowing that there is nothing to make it feel like we affected anything in the world so far and that so many of the characters we love will never appear again because they once gave us a choice involving them. Like, do I now need to hope I don't get any major choices for the new characters I fall in love with because that means they'll never bring them back again?? Better not get attached?? Is that really what you want to teach your players?

I don't have any hope that they are self-reflecting enough or care enough to do this, but maybe if the backlash is bad enough they'll start working on a patch that at least contains some codex entries and ambient voice lines? That's like my one piece of copium I can try to actually suspend disbelief for rn. Apparently I've entered the bargaining stage..

I've been hardcore hyping about Veilguard since 11 June (which happens to have been my birthday and like that was the best part of it for me) and I really don't want to feel this way, but I do and I don't know how to describe it other than I'm grieving.

This line currently feels immeasurably ironic...

#barfing my feels into the ether #bioware critical #datv #dav #veilguard #datv spoilers #veilguard spoilers #dai #dragon age #bioware #dragon age the veilguard #dragon age: the veilguard #datv critical

189 notes · View notes

roturo · 1 year ago

Text

COOL WITH YOU - gojo satoru x f!reader - + 4.5k words

summary: You never though throwing chocolate milk would lead you to being enemies with the popular guy at school, which led you into even a crazier situation.

warnings: smut; unprotected sex, cock warming, dacryphilia, pussy slapping, mating press, finger sucking, oral (f!receiving), marking, degradation kink, slut shaming, edging, teasing, sexual tension, overstimulation. Enemies into idk into lovers. UniversityAU, popular student!gojo satoru, fluff.

TUMBLR IS BASED ON A REBLOG SYSTEM. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK.

It was a really nice day, really.

Nothing out of the extraordinary, normal classes, normal notes, everything was going great! Nice weather, and even your hair was having a good day!, but lunch time had to come.

You were walking through the cafeteria looking for the table you and your friends usually sit at. Walking with your tray through other people, you were about to make it, until you stumbled and say stumbled for crashed into an almost 2 meter man, food flying everywhere, and if that wasn't enough, your choco milk made a mess on his white t-shirt.

WHY DOESN'T HE WEAR THE COMPLETE UNIFORM?

You felt all the possible stares into you, couldn't even see with who you crashed, way too embarrassed for it. Mumbling a lot of 'sorry, i'm going to pay it for you' 'I can wash it for you, i'm so sorry.' 'I'll buy you a new one.' You finally looked up and saw who it was.

Gojo Satoru. The popular guy in school. Might not be the smartest, but he has good grades. Not much of a troublemaker (he is), has dated at-least half of the girls in this school, and someway he still has a line of girls waiting for his turn.

He was next his best-friend. Suguru Geto, smartest guy in your class, he's more peaceful, just watches from a distance, a cute smirk, hasn't dated half of the girls in school, but still has a long line of girls waiting for a chance.

Your face flushed with embarrassment as she saw that the dark liquid from your spilled bottle had stained his pristine white shirt. Gojo's expression was anything but pleased, and he snapped at you, "Watch where you're going dumbass!"

You tried to apologize, but Gojo had clearly made up his mind about you. From that day on, Gojo wouldn't miss any chance to humiliate you just like you did that day in the cafeteria.

He wouldn't let go of that day, calling you all types of nicknames related to it. ¨Milkie¨ ¨Choco-latte¨ and much more. Mostly throwing your books you had in your arms walking through the halls, always putting milk on your desk when recess was done.

He would often challenge you with difficult questions in class, and you would slowly find yourself doing the same. Days went over and you were now annoyed at his behavior. Who does he think he is? He couldn't treat people like he wanted to!

¨Can you stop?¨ Utahime stopped eating, dramatically putting the fork down. ¨Stop what?¨

¨Stop looking at fucking Gojo Satoru! It’s been like two months and you’re still annoyed at him.¨

Oh god. He's looking back at your table, Utahime said it loud enough so half of the cafeteria could hear. Feeling your face growing hot you looked back at your friend, her face showing how unbothered she is by the annoyed side-eyes you guys were receiving.

¨It's like you got obsessed with him or something! All you do is talk about him, how angry you are about him, how he did this, how he did that, do you like HIM or what?¨

¨Of course NO! I don't like Gojo-...¨

A small cough interrupted the small discussion you were having, looking up for the person who annoyingly stopped you trying to justify why you don't like the Gojo Satoru, was in fact, the Gojo Satoru.

He was standing in all glory in front of your table with his best friend, Geto, which seemed kinda unbothered with this whole ordeal.

You looked like a little kid being caught trying to grab another candy from the bowl after he got his daily one... which made Gojo chuckle.

How cute.

¨I'm sorry ladies for interrupting your chat, but me, and my friend Geto Suguru, wanted to invite you to our upcoming party this weekend. Right Suguru?¨ He nudged Geto, with his annoying smirk, at what Geto just nodded.

You were about to deny the offer, saying you’re not one of his easy girls to smash with, but Utahime was faster than you and said yes to the invitation and lent her phone so they could send her the place and time.

Oh, well, fuck.

Utahime greeted you into her house with her radiant smile, her eyes shining with mischief. "I would’ve killed you if you didn’t come!" she exclaimed, pulling you into her room. "Tonight, you’re going to have a great fuck and forget that annoying asshole!" You rolled your eyes because of her assumption of you liking Gojo.

Utahime couldn't resist the thrill of the invitation, saying it’s ¨an event you have to live at least once at uni.¨ You spent hours preparing yourselves. Mostly, Utahime carefully choosing the perfect outfit and a dash of confidence to match.

You and Utahime arrived at the party, the room buzzed with laughter, music, and vibrant conversations. You’ve been spending the whole night thinking of a way to take revenge on Gojo, and show Utahime proof you don’t like him. You have tried plenty of ways; winning at sports games, not a surprise he’s better than you, but it still pisses you off how irritating he is. You also tried beating him at exams, which somehow you did beat him on them, but somehow he gets more acknowledgment about having a 9 than you having a 10?

Does he fuck the teacher too?

Fuck.

Fuck…

Fuck!

That’s what you need! To fuck Gojo Satoru.

…

Not in that way…

Well, yes. But not him fucking you. You fucking him.

His whole ego is based on how every girl likes him, so… what if you do what he does to the other girls?

Geto greeted the both of you with a smile, offering you something to drink, which you denied, contrary to Utahime. You were having a small chat with your friend and a friend of hers, she was really nice, short haired, not that tall but not that short, she's a friend of Satoru & Suguru apparently… a pretty smile adorning her face while talking with Utahime, her name was Shoko.

And Shoko is really fun, really, but you couldn’t stop from distracting yourself, eyes following the tall frame, going from girl to girl all around the house. It infuriated you how they could be so clueless of the man they’re talking with.

You decided you needed to distract yourself and stop focusing on what he’s doing. Entering the kitchen was really calm, two people chatting while drinking. Preparing yourself a drink, you felt a small push in your shoulder, and it’s like destiny made you to never stop thinking about him, since somehow he was always there.

¨Oops, didn’t see you there.¨ His stupid face, with his stupid smirk.

¨Can’t stop disturbing me for one minute in your entire life?!¨

¨Me? Disturb you? You’re the one who won't stop looking at the other like some obsessed stalker!¨

¨Well, it’s not my fault you keep fooling those girls thinking if they let you fuck them they will be with you at least more than a week before you get bored!¨

He laughed at you, which only made you even angrier. ¨Are you jealous or what?¨

¨I’m not jealous- … don’t. Don’t you dare look at me that way.¨

¨What way?¨

¨Like you want to fuck me.¨

The tension in the room grew stronger, his stupid eyes were having pleasure watching you being angry at him being with other girls. You’re really pretty too, he never took the time to realize that. Maybe it's your fault because of the grembling face you put when you’re around him.

Thank god Suguru came into the room giving you a way out of this situation, calling for Satoru and you.

¨Hey, we need both of you to help us with something back there, Utahime and Shoko are there also. Utahime is really nice, but uhh… she might gotten a little too much drunk…¨

"Do we have to bring her?¨ Gojo said, pointing back at you with his thumb, not even looking at you, just at Geto. ¨You know I hate her."

¨Yes Satoru, it’s her friend who we are talking about.¨

"I'm standing right here, you know..."

"I know." You were about to hit Satoru if it wasn’t that Geto didn’t grab the both of you by the wrist and started walking away.

After leaving a very drunk Utahime in Geto’s room, Shoko staying with her, the two other boys (Most like Geto) invited you to go for some midnight ice-cream around the corner, at which, you had nothing to do, so you accepted the offer, who wouldn’t want ice-cream for free?

The three of you got your ice-cream, you were with Satoru while Suguru was paying for them.

¨Your ice cream looks delicious, let me try.¨

¨We have the exact same ice cream, for god’s sake!¨ Satoru was faster than you and gave a big bite (with no teeth) to your ice-cream, you grumbled at his stubbornness.

¨Hey, no fair! You have more sprinkles than mine!¨ You looked up at his face, finding ice-cream all around his lips. Unconsciously your hand caressed his cheek and with your thumb, you wiped the ice-cream off his mouth. Your finger resting on his lower lip, he slightly opened his mouth giving enough space for your thumb to enter, which it did. His tongue swirled around it, savoring the ice-cream he stole from you. Your eyes never left his and vice versa. His cheeks were slightly pink, his eyes were now a darker shade of blue thanks to his dilated pupils.

His hands found a way to lock between your waist, making you get closer to him. Your thumb left his mouth and slowly got into his chest. He smiled at you. A genuine smile from him. Not an evil trace on it. His eyes squinted a little, which made you also smile.

¨Can y’all believe the old man wanted me to pay for an extra ice-cream we didn’t buy? I stayed like 10 min more trying to explain him we only bought 3.¨

Your face turned pale, as fast as you could, you pushed yourself out of Gojo’s embrace, he awkwardly coughed fixing his hair.

¨Are you guys okay?¨ Suguru looked confused but then looked at you and your melted ice-cream.

¨Oh shit. It melted. Your eyes locked with Satoru for a moment and moved on to the melted ice-cream. Did that really happen?

A week passed and Gojo couldn’t get you off his mind. The moment replaying every day, the feeling of your hand on his cheek never leaving. He was going crazy.

Ever since Utahime and Shoko got closer, that meant hanging out as a group. It somehow got better? Gojo stopped with the bitterness and the hate towards you, it turned more into teasing?, it’s like he’s been feeling cool with you?

It even turned into the both of you teasing each-other light heartly, it was fun.

During a late-night study session at Shoko’s, you and Gojo got into argument from some science topic, you could sense the others were annoyed at the unnecessary pause of studying, leading them into grabbing their phones to go through social media, going for water, or even just start making small drabbles of drawings, knowing they couldn’t do anything about the both of you arguing because of your stubbornness.

Until Utahime snapped, ¨Oh my god, can the both of you just fuck so the tension could leave?!¨ that left the both of you speechless and blankly looking at eachother, red invaded eachother’s face because of how things turned out and how others point of view of the type of relationship the two of you have.

...

... Your walk home was… awkward but nice?

¨Listen. It’s nearing midnight and you're a female walking the streets alone, at least let me walk you home? As much as you annoy me I’d rather you not get murdered¨ You take in his words slowly nodding in agreement as you cross your arms, ¨fine.. nice to hear that you don’t want me dead.¨

So that’s how the both of you ended walking together to your house. It was a weird bonding experience you didn’t think you needed.

¨Wow you can actually be a sweetheart this time, what happened to the boy who was arguing with me today is pluto is still considered a planet?¨

You say lightheartedly but turn to glare in his direction anyway, watching as he rubs the back of his neck with a chuckle.

¨Yeah that was pretty immature. to be fair we’re just as bad as each other ̈

You nodded in agreement it really is a game of back and forth trying to outdo each other. You felt a sudden wetness on your face sticking your hand out and watching as your palms filled with water capturing the rain droplets within, the rain poured without any mercy but thankfully you could see your house just a little down the street, with the nice moment you were having with Gojo you bravely grabbed his hand with a giggle making a bolt towards your house, to your surprise Gojo tightened his grip running beside you as the rain soaked you both.

Catching your breaths as you stood on your porch, sheltering yourselves from the rain, breathlessly laughing as you straightened yourself looking up at Gojo who was just as drenched.

¨Who saw that coming?¨ He smiles pulling lightly on your hand that still stayed secured in his, you were only inches away from each other but the cool breeze and crackling of the thunder held a mysterious mood that drew you into him.

In what should have been forbidden your lips touched, tasting the water that ran along your face seeping into your mouth as you reconnected with Gojo’s pretty lips, it didn’t last long as a large gust of wind interrupted causing you to shiver and unintentionally find comfort in Gojo, pressing against his chest. You could feel his hand rubbing gently against your upper back as he stared down calmly, you finally pulled away from him jiggling with your front door and popping it open with just a twist of your key, frowning your eyebrows slightly as you turn to look at the soaking wet boy again watching him turn towards the rain and stepping closer as if he was about to make a run for it.

¨You don’t have to leave.. it looks pretty hectic out there, i can dry your clothes and you can leave when it’s safer, if that’s what you want?¨ Gojo seemed conflicted a hint of hesitation could be seen but his expression was mostly unreadable, he took one last look out towards the street before turning on his heels, walking into your house with a smile, ¨That seems like a better idea.. thanks.¨

You really didn’t know what you were thinking letting Gojo into your house but it felt right, ¨Your... hoodie¨, you say holding your hand out towards him.¨I can put it in the dryer¨ Gojo paused for a moment looking down, his lips shaping into a straight line as his cheeks puffed out. ¨I’m not wearing an undershirt¨ You let out a light oh before making your way into the laundry room, ¨here! You can throw a towel over yourself if you feel uncomfortable!¨ You yell out to him, turning around to be greeted with Gojo’s bare chest, ¨It’s fine I don’t need a towel¨ He plainly says handing you his hoodie, you quickly nod taking it and heading over to the dryer.

¨What about my pants?¨ You hear him say as you open the lid. ¨What about them?¨ You question turning around to see his slightly wet jeans, ¨They’re not that wet but I can do them too.. got that towel?¨, Gojo let’s out a chuckle unzipping his jeans.

¨I’m not going to be naked, I do have underwear on after all, do you want me to wear a towel?¨ You went silent slowly extending your arm and making a gimme motion with your hand, ¨I don’t care it’s your decision¨, you say sounding a bit flustered, looking away nervously Gojo stripped himself of his jeans leaving him in his underwear. You throw his clothes into the dryer freezing suddenly before closing the lid, realising your own saturated clothes as you played with the hem of your shirt, “fuck it”, you whispered ripping your top from over your head, your pants following in hot pursuit letting them join in with Gojo’s clothes.

The dryer light blinked on watching as the session started not daring to turn around as you knew Gojo was still very much present, feeling a sense of embarrassment as you stood away from him semi nude, the only thing you didn’t know is that he was much closer than you thought feeling his hand smooth over your arm a slight tingling sensation could be felt as he pressed up against your bare back, ¨Aren’t you cold?¨, he said sliding his mouth near your ear, you slowly nodded feeling your words getting stuck in your throat, ¨I mean no, not really¨ You crackled out quickly correcting yourself, your whole body was heating up as the butterflies in your stomach did multiple backflips, ¨Well I am baby¨, you let out a rigid breath feeling your pussy contract within itself at the sudden nickname, you had no idea he could make you feel this way, ¨How are you gonna get warm?¨ You softly breathe out goosebumps arising from your skin as Gojo rubbed up and down your sides placing a few kisses against your neck, ¨I have an idea if you’d spread your legs a little?¨ You obeyed his words like a dog, running on your own horny adrenaline.

¨Are you okay with this?¨ You nodded, feelin his fingers come in contact with your pussy pushing your panties to the side as he swiped his pointer finger through your folds, he stopped clutching his hands roughly on your hips, his forehead laying on your shoulder blade.

¨How? You’re so wet, I barely even touches you.¨ Gojo said sensually pulling your hips towards him as he rubbed his hard against your ass, ¨I thought I’d have to do a little more but I think this is enough.. ready?¨

He kissed up your back adjusting himself a bit, ¨Ready?... for what?-¨, You struggled to say the last syllables as Gojo pushed the tip of his cock into you wrapping an arm around your waist and the other holding onto the dryer in front of you, pulling you upwards so he can angle your entrance just right so he can fully fit into you comfortably.

A gasp escaped you quickly holding onto the side of his thigh as he stayed still, the feeling of his long cock deep inside you made you wriggle pulling your heat away from him as he replants himself, the heat off Gojo’s chest and stomach burned into your back, ¨Now that’s warm¨, Gojo spoke, ¨And it’s tight too¨, He slightly giggled out resting his head on your shoulder.

¨Is it uncomfortable?¨ He quietly spoke in concernment Gojo’s worries fading as he finally feels you melting into him, ¨No it’s good¨ You say sheepishly feeling the slight shake of his arm as he continued to hold onto the dryer, another kiss being littered against your upper back upon hearing you.

It’s beyond weird getting this intimate with him but there always was some lingering sexual tension though. Nothing is really happening as you both stood in silence while Gojo kissed your body, leaving hickeys everywhere. Your body temperatures rising quickly but soon you started to feel Gojo’s movements, he awkwardly pumped himself into you stopping and starting his motions as he fought his urges, ¨Satoru?... If you’re going to fuck me just do it, this is nice and all but I know what we both want¨

You say trying to look at the boy who was still resting his head on your shoulder, you saw him perk up displaying a gummy like smile, ¨If that’s what you want who am I to deny you?¨

He jolted you forward banging you flat against the dryer giving you a sharp thrust as he grabbed a hold of your hair, bringing you back so he could kiss you, ¨You really want your enemy fucking you? Want everyone to know how of a cockslut you are? That Utahime was right? filthy.¨

You hum in pleasurable agreement a cheeky giggle escaping you as Gojo tilts your head to the side giving himself access to your neck, ¨Enemy? Do you really want to be calling yourself that when you started this? I think you’ve always wanted to do this, you love me¨ You say daringly, feeling incredibly unsatisfied as he pulled himself out of you spinning you around and finally coming face-to-face with him, Gojo’s hair now completely dry but nothing changed about his smirk.

¨You don’t need this” He unclips your bra way too easily wiggling it in front of your face like a trophy

“Don’t try putting this act on me, you’ve wanted my dick ever since you met me, those looks you don't give them to everyone.. probably why you love me so much ̈ You push him away playfully, covering your breasts and snatching your bra from him attempting to walk passed, Gojo re-attaches himself to you pulling you into a back hug as he kisses you roughly, biting your lower lip dragging slightly out making you whine.

“Don’t be stubborn, the laundry room is nice but why don’t you show me the bedroom?” You lean into him with a satisfied smile spreading across your face as you had every intention in bringing him to your bed, ¨Where do you think I’m taking you?¨

Nothing was stopping you, both fully naked in bed as Gojo’s face found refuge in between your legs licking up and down your slit and sucking on your sensitive clit, making infinity signs between them, holding your thighs apart to stop you from caging him in with each spasm of your body, “I’m gonna-“, you moaned out Gojo humming at your words removing his mouth from your heat and licking his two fingers as he dives them straight into your soaking pussy pumping in and out, “You’re gonna what?” He smirks, making a gesture of using his free hand to put on his ear to sign like he didn’t listen to you. Watching as you gasp at the sudden intrusion his smirk grew larger. ¨Oh! There! Satoru please I-¨

He stopped, smiling proudly and taking in your watery eyes, his smile soon turning into a sarcastic pout, ¨Aw, that’s cute¨ He laughed, pushing you flat against the bed as you leaned up to try and hit him, him being faster slapping your pussy.

¨Oh stop it! you’ll get what you want later slut, look what you’ve done to me¨ He looks down at his hard and angry cock begging for attention, rolling his fingers around his shaft as he covers his member in your juices.

¨Open your legs wider” Gojo hovers above you angling himself at your cunt, finally slipping back into your wet cunt, wasting no time in hammering into you giving you no chance in preparing for his speed, quickly wrapping your arms around his neck as he mercilessly rocks you back and forth but as Gojo lifted each of your legs up putting you into a mating press, which made the thrusters even go deeper inside you, turning you into a beautiful moaning mess.¨Ah! Look at you, you’re beautiful¨

Gojo groans out closing his eyes and throwing his head back in an attempt not to bust, picking up the pace as he fucks you raw diving his face into your neck as he concentrates feeling his heavy panting on your neck.

¨Don’t stop this time¨ You barely get out feeling your body getting to it’s highest point again, your back arching immediately as Gojo’s fingers had sneakily approached your clit rubbing your clit at lightning speed. You couldn’t breathe your legs spasming out and clenching around Gojo so hard he could barely move, your moans turning into a pleasurable scream as you reached your orgasm falling limp as you continued to pulsate around Gojo’s cock.

He isn’t done yet. Taking in sharp breaths as he chases after his own high, you whine slightly from sensitivity but you weren’t going to stop him, thrusting a few more times till he pulls out in quickly, pumping himself in his hand as he aims his load on your stomach, moaning sweetly as he shoots his cum all over your lower half swiping his thumb over his head picking up some of the white substance and shoving it into your slightly agape mouth, ¨How does it taste sweetheart?¨ You start sucking his thumb without any hesitation making a loud popping sound as you pull his hand away.¨Delicious¨, you smile.

With a satisfied chuckle Gojo collapsed onto your bed watching as he reached for anything to help clean yourself up with, ¨I don’t regret doing that you know…¨ He quickly says as he wiped up his mess, ¨I would’ve preferred if you cum somewhere a little less messy¨ You raised an eyebrow, ¨I meant having sex with you.. I’d do it again¨ You smiled, feeling the excitement run through you with just the thought of having sex with Gojo again ¨I’d like that too¨ He went a little quiet intensely watching you, getting closer to you, his lips crashed yours. This time it wasn’t rushed at all, he was moving his lips slowly, capturing every moment of it. Taking a small moment to breathe, he started kissing you again, then giving small pecks all around your face which made you giggle. He finally stopped with getting himself around your arms, cuddling you.

He called out your name at which you just answered with a small sound out of tiredness.

¨I think I love you.¨

#gojo satoru smut #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutus kaisen #smut #gojo satoru x reader smut #gojo satoru x you #pls dont let this flop

1K notes · View notes

atopvisenyashill · 3 months ago

Note

What are your thoughts on GRRM’s new notablog post on HOTD S2?

omg i'm sorry so i did not get notified that i had a few new asks, i didn't even see this until i logged in on desktop. tumblr eat shit smh.

ANYWAYS.

I actually agree with Xiran Jay Zhao, here, where they said this was a warning shot. It feels like a warning shot. Like a "hey I'm being nitpicky and pedantic now but if you think I won't go scroched earth you got another thing coming." I've seen so much "this is unprofessional" "this is annoying" "why is he complaining" and I think it is not only mind boggling to side with a corporation and the idiots running these shows (and we know I mostly like Condal and Hess, but come on Condal was the mastermind of Sansa Bolton why are we defending him right now!!), I think everyone is blowing his comments wildly out of proportion. He didn't take a dig at anyone but the writer's room and more specifically Ryan Condal, who he has had a working relationship with for well over a decade. He didn't shittalk any casting, he didn't shittalk any specific writers or directors except one of the main showrunners, he compliments the special effects, he has consistently had (and imo is careful) nothing but praise for the actors, even minor roles like Blood & Cheese. This was an incredibly milqtoast "please remember that every change has huge affects on the narrative later" critique and the people handwringing over his behavior are absolute losers, I'm sorry.

And beyond the fact that he didn't make any huge digs, I think this conversation also wildly ignores the way authors have no control over their own characters once they sign the rights over. They can be completely bamboozled by changes and they have no recourse to go "what the hell are you doing." And yet, signing your book's rights away (even if the production sits in developmental hell for decades) is usually what nets these author's the most money - GRRM surely makes a shitton off his books, but most authors get paid absolutely nothing even when they're wildly popular because of how book deals work now. Take, again, Xiran for example - Iron Widow was a huge runaway hit, a good and fresh take on this new boom of culturally based sff. And yet Xiran has talked about how they immediately set to work writing a middle grade novel because they desperately needed the money because they got paid 16k over two years for their runaway hit that made their publishers significantly more than 16k. I think George is not only mad for authors with less control than he has but also, obviously, for himself - I've said time and again, but I do think Dark Daenerys is where we are headed, and the fact that they completely botched showing it has got to smart. And if the ending for Dany is anything other than Jon killing her, that has got to smart too. So he watched these people fuck up his original series and push him completely out of that writer's room as they made more and more changes, and now he's watching s2 of HOTD and seeing some changes and getting some real bad vibes. It's not doomerism to think s3 is going to go massively off the rails when we have seasons 6-8 of the main show to show us just how off the rails it can go!

So anyways, that part of my rant over (and please believe me when I say I checked myself here because I could rant for hours about how it's genuinely so upsetting to see people call him unprofessional over this when not only did he write the fucking series, but he's lived in this series for three decades!!!!! this is his whole life, this is his legacy, of course he's feeling some type of way about how it's handled jesus christ on a cracker, there's people who have said worse about their mediocre nyt pushed bestsellers getting adapted badly!), when it comes to the actual meat of his post....I'm sorry idk how anyone is annoyed by this post because it was hilarious to me. He spent a whole blog post whinging about how Dead Baby #4 and Kingsguard Man #12 are gonna get cut out of the show. I think he framed it in that goofy way on purpose to hide how annoyed he is but you can see where the real annoyance lies - the changes to Helaena, losing one of his grisly death scenes, and being willfully mislead about potential changes to the plot. I think a lot of people missed those points but EYE am not a goofy ass like those people and I can guarantee you that Condal and HBO got the point too.

Of course, I do think he is also irked about Maelor and Ser Rickard's scenes being cut out. He wrote a long ass, highly meticulous, near unadaptable work, and I think when he handed the IP over he assumed he was giving it to people who would rise to the challenge and only make cuts when absolutely necessary. And that just clearly hasn't happened. Incredibly important characters get cut, main characters get their plots wildly changed for no reason, and people get personality transplants on a near constant basis for no other reason than D&D and Condal thought it would look cooler. I think if there was more dedication to keeping him in the loop and keeping true to the story, he wouldn't have bitched so much. But Hess is on record saying she doesn't feel loyal to the story and at a certain point, you reach your breaking point there and I think he has finally reached his. AND GOOD FOR HIM. LET THAT OLD MAN GO APESHIT THEY'VE COMPLETLEY FUCKED HIS WORLD UP!!!

#asks #grrm #anti D&D #anti ryan condal #anti hotd #like saying this as someone who liked the first season and thought the blacks part of this season was good #he is right to be mad and i can't believe i've seen so many people get angry over this #i would be so much more annoying if i was him

67 notes · View notes

ikeuverse · 11 months ago

Text

DON'T BE AFRAID TO SAY — l.heeseung

PAIRING: heeseung x fem!reader GENRES: fluff, angst WC: 15.3k+

WARNINGS: mention of betrayal (not between heeseung and y/n), swearing, arguing, drinking alcohol, mention of sex, and i think that's it. let me know if i've forgotten anything, please.

SYNOPSIS: lee heeseung is afraid to say the three famous words out loud, and he knows that because he didn't, he lost you once. and he doesn't want that to happen again.

NOTES: first of all, more than 15k words? maybe i got carried away or idk i was abstaining from writing... this is the longest story I've ever written on this tumblr (so far). i've had this idea for a while and i've also read similar things, but never with heeseung being the one who can't say i love you. i decided to do it the way i imagined it would be, so i hope you like it!

masterlist

Your fingers circled the wine glass as she looked at your flatmate and best friend. The tip of her nose was red from crying and, with a little more wine in her glass, she drank it all in one gulp.

"You're going to get drunk like that" your voice came out low, to warn her, not scolding her.

"That's the point" Hyojin smiled without any humor, pouring some more and showing you that it was over.

One more bottle, she hissed in your direction and you got up to get it from the fridge. Your best friend wasn't kidding when she told you to go to the market and buy six bottles of wine for the evening.

Break-ups are hard, you think, although you've never really experienced them. You just follow your friends and even your favorite movies and characters. But the worst break-up is when the guy swears his love, asks you to marry, and then says he's been offered a job on the other side of the country.

It happened to Hyojin. Her relationship with Seungho was perfect, worthy of a movie script, you'd think. They met in their last year of high school – you met Hyojin in your first year of college, so Seungho came with baggage. And every year on that university campus the two of them stood out because they were so close and loving towards each other.

After graduating, the two moved in together and after a year Seungho asked her to marry him. You still remember Hyojin's eyes shining as brightly as that ring on her finger while your best friend giggled on the sofa in their small apartment.

"I'm getting married" she said, and you agreed. Because of the two of you, she was even more likely to do it because of your long-standing relationship, while you had never been in a relationship. Not even a serious one.

After months of engagement, Seungho said that he had been offered a job on the other side of the country. Hyojin had always encouraged him, so there was no hesitation when she helped him pack for the trip. But not before shedding a few tears over the constant conversations they had when he stayed at the couple's apartment to make the final arrangements.

"Are you sure we'll work out from a distance?" he asked one night, looking deep into Hyojin's eyes as he sighed. Even though she didn't know what he was asking, she only agreed and assured him that she would wait for him, or even try to ask for a transfer from her work to the headquarters less than an hour from where Seungho said he would be staying.

But there was no time. The shock of seeing Seungho going to the other side of the country and getting into a relationship with a woman from the company made Hyojin's stomach turn.

I was being betrayed the whole time, she mumbled through sobs as you tried to calm her down in the middle of the apartment your best friend shared with her - now - ex-fiancé.

How could Hyojin never have suspected? How could you never see that he was capable of this? Was Seungho so fake as to deceive Hyojin's family, her friends and everyone around to show himself to be an honest man while having an affair with a woman from his work?

"Maybe we should go to his new job and set fire to his new office" Sora, another friend of the two of you, suggested while pouring some more chocolate ice cream.

Sneakily, you picked up your phone and stared at your friend.

"I think I'll ask Jake to put our contact in the emergency room in case he needs help" you commented. Jake was Sora's boyfriend and your best friend at college. He had also met Seungho and hated the whole thing, but he had to divide himself between looking after his best friend – with the help of his girlfriend – and Hyojin's brother who was fighting the urge to kill his younger sister's ex-fiancé.

The whole issue itself leads up to the moment in question where, one more night, Hyojin falls into the weakness of feeling sad again. Crying and wondering where she had gone wrong all this time that she hadn't noticed a single sign that she was being betrayed.

All this guilt consumed you all the more for being your best friend for so long that you couldn't even say anything. So your apology was to buy more wine and let your best friend, and now flatmate, drink as much as she wanted.

Asking Hyojin to move in with you after the breakup was the least you could do since she didn't want to stay where she was either. Nothing that reminded of her ex was something to be proud of. So the further away she was, the better off she would be.

"Maybe you need to go to bed now" you said sleepily, yawning and leaving your glass halfway down.

"No, of course not" she was cheerful, even if her whole face looked a bit swollen from the amount of crying she'd done "How about we have a party?"

"Now?" you widened your eyes as you picked up your cell phone to check the time.

One o'clock in the morning.

"Hyojin, let's go to bed" you stood up and tried to take her by the hand, but your friend sidestepped you and took the device from her. Unlocking it and typing a few things "What are you doing?"

Hyojin didn't answer, putting the phone on speaker.

"Hyojin…"

"Hyojin?" the thick, sleepy voice on the other end of the line indicated that it was a boy. Sleepy and a little inebriated, you narrowed your eyes to see the caller ID.

"Hey, brother" she laughed softly and then looked at you, her eyes so small that you could see the effect of so many bottles of wine.

"You're drunk, aren't you?" he said. A rustle on the other end of the line indicated that he was stirring in bed to get up, apparently waking from his peaceful slumber.

"Y/n's fault, she bought me a drink."

"Motherfucker" you whispered.

"Can I talk to y/n?" he asked at the same moment you cursed your best friend.

With a mischievous, cheeky grin, Hyojin agreed without protest and gave you her cell phone. Before he did anything, your gaze followed your friend out of the kitchen as she said needed to go to the bathroom. He then took the handset off the speakerphone.

"Y/n?" he called this time.

"Hi, Heeseung" you didn't know why you'd swallowed, even though you weren't face to face, you could imagine the small smile he gave when you said his name.

"Can you keep her awake for a few minutes until I get there?" he asked. You couldn't see, but Heeseung had the speakerphone on just to get out of his pajamas and into more comfortable clothes, putting on his sneakers and picking up the handset again.

"What? You're coming—"

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes, okay?" there was no denying it since you remembered how protective Heeseung was of Hyojin. So you could only agree with your best friend's older brother "Okay, I'll call you on her cell phone to let you know I've arrived."

And before you could even process that Heeseung had hung up, Hyojin arrived in the kitchen.

"So… Did you miss my brother's voice?" she asked in a mischievous tone, making you roll your eyes.

"You're drunk and delirious" you were holding her cell phone in your hands, laughing as your best friend hugged you by the shoulders "Now let's stay on the couch until Heeseung gets here."

"He's coming over? Did you ask?"

"No" you said simply, ending the conversation at that moment as Hyojin walked into the living room to sit down, waiting for his brother.

While you divided your attention between the device and your best friend, yawning a few times and feeling that the drunkenness was gradually wearing off. At the same time, your heart began to race, and you just wanted to push away the thought that the reason was coming in fifteen minutes.

Heeseung had arrived in fifteen minutes, or even less, you couldn't tell. He talked to you to try to find out how many bottles Hyojin had drunk and if she had done anything other than call him.

No. All the answers were no and Heeseung was relieved to know that you were taking such good care of his sister.

You tried to reassure him that everything was fine and that he could rest, but knowing your overprotection and big-brother instincts, it was nothing new that Heeseung would take Hyojin to bed and sleep there.

Nor would it be news that the next morning you would be sitting on one of the stools facing the kitchen worktop watching Heeseung cook breakfast.

Your sleepy voice made him laugh to himself as he asked you what you liked to eat. Pancakes with extra chocolate icing was a good one, a little blood glucose, and a good strong coffee without sugar to balance out the hangover. It all blended so well in your mouth that you almost let out a compliment louder than: thank you, this is amazing.

It wasn't long before Hyojin woke up, much worse off than you, and joined the bench next to you to eat breakfast.

"What will you have?" Heeseung asked in a low tone, already preparing himself for the next words.

"Don't shout, I've got a headache" Hyojin spoke, he just moved his lips as if imitating her, already knowing exactly what she would say. You laughed, only to be reprimanded by your best friend.

"Okay, strong coffee first" Heeseung whispered and poured some of the strong brown liquid into a cup he had already set aside for her.

While Hyojin drank, you finished your chocolate pancakes and stared at your best friend next to you. But that didn't stop you from feeling the weight of the pair of eyes in front of you. You didn't want to turn and face Heeseung, but you knew he was looking at you.

The three of you remained silent for long minutes until Hyojin had recovered – after three long cups of coffee – opting to go and sit at the table since the kitchen counter wouldn't be as comfortable to hold a conversation staring at each other.

"Well…" Heeseung began, looking at you until he focused on Hyojin "Six bottles? Really?"

A short silence is maintained until she clicks her tongue inside her mouth, bringing the cup halfway to her lips and taking a sip of coffee.

"Last time I managed to outdo myself, it was nine bottles" she laughed to herself, knowing it wasn't funny, but wanting to get rid of the tense atmosphere and the two of them staring at her with concern.

"Did he call you?" he let slip after a while. Hyojin didn't want to appear fragile now, so you just huffed and made a point of getting up. Perhaps this was a private conversation between the brothers and you didn't want to get involved.

"No" Hyojin said as she grabbed your arm, so that answer had a double meaning – both for Heeseung and for your leaving the kitchen, she wanted you to stay.

"Then why do you still insist on drinking because of that asshole and crying about him every night?"

Another moment of silence. You wanted to leave while there was still time, but Hyojin's hand remained on your arm.

"Maybe because it's been more than five years of relationship, including a year of engagement."

The brothers exchanged angry glances with each other, but they weren't angry with each other. Heeseung wasn't mad at Hyojin and Hyojin wasn't mad at him.

You mentioned opening your mouth a few times and shut up when they started arguing with each other. With no intention of stopping so soon, you knew that when the Lee brothers started an argument, it would go on for so long that all you had to do was pick up your friend's cup and drink the coffee for her.

"How was I supposed to know he was cheating on me, Heeseung?" Hyojin snapped, just in time for you to pull on her arm and get out of there quickly.

Dialing Jake's number, the only one who could help you in this whole situation. He didn't need to ask you anything when you just said "come quickly" because he knew what he had to do.

And as quickly as Heeseung arrived last night, Jake was walking through the door of the apartment.

The brothers were still arguing in the kitchen and you had a sad smile on your face.

"How long?" he asked, pulling you into a hug and smelling freshly brewed coffee.

"Since I called you, that's…"

"Twenty minutes" he looked at his cell phone and then at you, linking his arm in yours so that the two of you could go into the kitchen where the discussion was still going on.

None of the Lee brothers realized that you had been gone for so long, and even fewer had noticed Jake's arrival – now with you – in the kitchen. The two of them shouted at each other and Hyojin sometimes banged the table when he noticed how ironic his older brother was being.

"Were you stupid enough to believe that he would wait for you on the other side of the country?" Heeseung shouted this time. The veins were prominent on his neck as he kept his fists clenched on the table, imagining one of his hands meeting Seungho's face.

"I was, Heeseung. I was dumb enough because I loved Seungho" Hyojin shouted back "I've loved him for all these years, but there's no point in arguing about it because you don't know what love is, do you?"

"Hyojin" he called out to his sister, his eyes widening when she mentioned such a thing.

"What? I was stupid enough to be cheated on and we can't bring up the fact that Mr. Perfect doesn't know what real love is?"

"That's enough!" Jake shouted so loudly that it startled all three of them at once.

You cringed next to him, Hyojin shuddered and Heeseung stood up so quickly that he felt his vision go dark for a few seconds before returning to normal.

"Jake?" the Lee brothers asked at the same time.

He cleared his throat, untangling his arm from you to walk over to the two of them who were standing near the dining table.

"What are you doing here?" Heeseung asked.

"Trying to intervene in a silly fight between siblings" he kept his voice loud but didn't shout this time. Looking between Heeseung and Hyojin, he sighed "What the fuck are you two doing?"

Really, what were the two of them doing? Stopping the fight for a while and looking in your direction, you seemed stunned by everything that was happening while Hyojin and Heeseung realized why Jake was there.

You called him. You called Jake so that he would somehow try to stop what you hadn't been able to.

"I'm sorry" Hyojin tried to say, but you just nodded and looked away from the two brothers to go to the counter and get some more coffee.

"I think this whole situation is getting on everyone's nerves, that's for sure" Jake began, signaling to you that he also wanted some coffee. As soon as he took the cup, he thanked you and sat down in the chair next to Hyojin – where you had been sitting before everything started "But we don't have to blame each other for something that's Seungho's fault."

No one doubted Jake's words and how right he was about them, but hearing out loud that it wasn't anyone's fault made Heeseung panic. Because he needed to blame someone, or at least try to get all the anger out since everything happened and he saw his sister cry.

It was different from a scraped knee, for example. Or when Hyojin cried when she was ten because Heeseung wouldn't let her play with his Legos.

It was also different when Heeseung fought with Hyojin for eating the last chocolate from the box of sweets, for example. Or how he yelled – not raged – at her because Hyojin had borrowed one of his perfumes. Without asking. Because she liked the smell of her older brother.

It was all very different, that's for sure.

"Is now the time for an apology?" Hyojin looked at his brother, who had his head down and was staring at his fingers.

You and Jake nodded in agreement, but before she could say anything, Heeseung stood up.

"I'm leaving, Jake and y/n can take care of you from here" and without waiting for anyone else to say anything, he left.

Hyojin wanted to mentally curse herself more than before. More than anything. Looking at her two friends who remained in the kitchen, their vision blurred by tears, she sobbed.

"Your words were hard, you know, aren't they?" she laid her head on Jake's shoulder, as the boy felt her tears soak through his T-shirt. Hyojin sobbed some more, then bit his lower lip.

"I just… I thought…" she couldn't say anything. You knew that, because Jake had known the brothers for a little longer, perhaps the truths – or insults – spoken at that moment carried things you didn't know yet. So you decided to keep quiet and leave the kitchen once again.

You walked into the living room just in time to see Heeseung coming down the stairs from the duplex, fixing his hair and the sweatshirt he'd worn the night before. He turned to you, his eyes watering too, but he didn't say anything. Not even a nod in your direction. Just a sad look, perhaps thanking you for the day's stay and for looking after Hyojin while he got to the apartment.

Leaving quickly, Heeseung had you worried because you knew why Hyojin was crying, but you had no idea why he was shedding those tears.

"Traveling?" Hyojin frowned as you pushed the milkshake glass towards her. Berries for your best friend while you sipped on something with salted caramel.

"A whole month away from all this, what do you think?"

"A whole month?" she widened her eyes "And where would we go?"

Her shoulders rose and fell, shrugging them slowly as she pretended to think. It turned out that you and Jake had talked a lot over the last few weeks after that moment in your apartment with the Lee brothers. All the events were affecting everything around you, the boy had even said that he almost got into a fight with Sora for a silly reason because he was thinking of ways to end Seungho's life.

That man had ruined the mood of everyone in Hyojin's life and none of them wanted it anymore.

"Jake said he missed Grandma Lee's farmhouse" you smiled with your lips around the straw, sipping your milkshake as you listened to your best friend laugh.

"What are you two up to?" she asked, sipping her cold drink and feeling that cozy taste. It was the drink the two of you shared once a week when you wanted to talk outside the house or simply get out of the routine of coffee, wine, or any other drink you had inside your home – the apartment you shared after everything happened.

"Actually" you looked away and stared at the people in the street. Each one with their daily life, average problems or not. Some talk on their cell phones and others enjoy the company of another person, a child, a dog on a leash, and even a food delivery man balancing a few boxes in his hand as he enters an establishment in front of the café. You turned your attention to Hyojin, smiling at her "Jake and I have talked a lot since everything happened and we were just thinking about something we could all do together again. Just like old times."

Like old times, that phrase echoed in Hyojin's head. You all used to go to her grandmother's country house, yes. You, Heeseung, Jake and Sora, and her with Seungho. Spending incredible moments with Grandma Lee, while the siblings recounted everything they'd ever gotten up to on that estate.

Jake has already risked climbing the apple tree that Heeseung almost fell from when he was eight. Or how Seungho gently cut up the vegetables for Grandma Lee while you set the table bathed in yet another nostalgic story about the brothers. Or even of the little lady who loved company.

It was a different place to where you used to go, far from the city, the beach, or any social interaction since you all had plenty of that in the city where you lived.

It was on Grandma Lee's farm that you learned to knit and sew, for example. And it was there that Sora painted a friendship picture on her last vacation that hung in your living room. That place contained a lot of memories of the Lee brothers, but it was also a place where Hyojin was creating a lot of memories with her friends too, along with her brother – she wanted to exclude Seungho completely from these thoughts.

"If I accept this vacation" she began, a smile widening her lips as you listened to your best friend ramble on until she sighed at the end of the sentence "why do we need to stay a month?"

"Because it's enough time for Jake to explore all of your granny's fruit trees" you listed, sipping your cold drink to wet your throat "Or for Heeseung to teach Sora how to ride his grandfather's tractor" you both laughed at the last memory when she almost broke through a fence "Or how your grandmother can keep teaching me how to knit" you shrugged.

It was unfair to list all that with the smell of longing and nostalgia for Hyojin. She knew it had been a long time since she'd seen her grandmother, and long enough since she'd taken a vacation to relax.

"Have you two told Heeseung about this?" she asked.

Perfect, she's considering the idea, you thought as you shook your head in reply.

"Jake's going to talk to him today."

"So this meeting of ours wasn't about drinking?" your friend pretended to be offended when she realized that, at the moment you were talking to her about it, Jake was probably talking to Jake too, wherever you were.

With a guilty smile, you finished your milkshake and smiled at her before grimacing.

"Vacation. A month to miss granny Lee, please?"

With a pout on your lips, you hoped that this would convince Lee Hyojin to go on vacation with you and Jake.

Grandma Lee's hug was so welcoming that you didn't want to leave, feeling her hands smoothing your back as you laid your head on hers.

"How I've missed having you all here" she said after releasing you, going to hug Sora in the same way.

"We missed you too, Grandma" Hyojin had already hugged her, so he sat down on the sofa while he waited for Grandma to get her friends to join her.

"How did you all manage to leave at the same time?" she asked "And the boys, where are they?"

"Coming a bit late" Hyojin said "Heeseung and Jake had to pick someone up, so we wanted to come quickly."

"To get the best guest room" you added.

When they came to Grandma Lee's house, Hyojin used to share a room with Seungho, while you and Sora shared another, next to Heeseung and Jake in the other room. Since it would be kind of weird for you to sleep with your best friend's brother. Or not.

This time the division would be with you sleeping with Hyojin, while Jake and Sora would share the other room, and Heeseung would sleep with his new friend who was arriving. Up went the suitcases and superficially tidied up until they arrived, which didn't take long when Jake's car horn was heard coming down the road before it stopped near the fences of Grandma Lee's property.

You all came out of the house together with the lady to greet the new arrivals who were getting out of the vehicle to unload their bags and supplies.

"Hey, you didn't take long" Sora approached first, being hugged by Jake as he kissed her quickly.

"I thought the two of them were going to roll into the house, but it was kind of quick" he smiled, opening the trunk to grab his things, but before he could pull out the suitcase, Jake shouted, "Granny!"

He ran out towards the lady who was already near the entrance stairs to greet him. Heeseung got out of the car laughing at the typical scene that happened every time they went there. It was as if Jake was more of a grandson than Heeseung himself or even Hyojin. He felt more like part of the family and even had a little argument with you for having been adopted first as Mrs. Lee's grandson.

"How handsome you look, Jake" she said after hugging him, receiving a grateful smile from the boy.

"You look wonderful" Jake complimented "And you know what I brought?"

"Don't tell me you—"

"Jake, if you brought my grandmother a drink…" Hyojin wanted to yell at him when he saw his friend shrug and dodge a slap he could have received on his arm.

You and Sora could only laugh at the whole situation as you watched Heeseung approach a boy. Your eyes narrowed to decipher who it was, without recognizing him until he got close enough and waved to the two of you.

"Grandma" Heeseung didn't want to let go of the lady in his arms, almost lifting her off the ground when he went to hug her. Laughing at the whole thing, Grandma Lee said she missed her eldest grandson before he introduced the boy "Women, this is our friend Sunghoon. Sunghoon, this is my wonderful, perfect granny" the tall, dark-haired boy smiled at the lady, who wasn't shy about hugging him too "This is Sora, Jake's girlfriend" she waved to Sunghoon after he had been hugged by Grandma Lee "And this is y/n, my sister's best friend."

"Oh" Sunghoon raised his eyebrows when he heard her name, and it made his smile falter. Did he know you?

You nodded back, swallowing dryly and putting it out of your mind for a while when Jake returned with Hyojin.

"Have you chosen your rooms yet?" he asked "We've brought so much food that I think we'll have enough for the whole month."

"That's great, I'm going to cook a lot for all of you" while Grandma Lee was talking to the rest of the group, you pulled Jake along before he approached the car with the others to unload everything they had brought. He looked at you with a calm countenance, smiling without showing his teeth and waiting for you to say something.

"Who's Sunghoon?" you asked quietly, afraid that someone would overhear.

Jake bit his lip to keep from laughing, but it still happened. This time he received a slap on the arm from you.

"Come on, why am I getting hit?" he asked, dodging another slap and staying by your side as you started walking to the car "He's a friend of Heeseung's from work, we talk about a lot of things, and... Well, eventually about girls too."

"And why did he… Mhm…" you could feel your cheeks burning at the thought, but you still wanted to ask "And why did he look surprised when he heard my name?"

Jake didn't laugh this time, but he kept a shit-eating grin on his face as he let everyone take their bags into the house, leaving just you and him there to pick up the rest.

"Because I talk about Sora, we talk about Hyojin too" he ran the tip of his tongue between his lips before speaking "And Heeseung has said things about you a few times too."

"Things? About me? But wait… What kind of things?" you asked.

Jake picked up the heavier bags, leaving some light ones for you to carry. When he had taken them, he closed the trunk of the car and activated the alarm to enter Grandma Lee's house with you.

"How about we talk and have a drink tonight after dinner?" Jake whispered, "So you can ask Sunghoon himself."

Jake was a son of a bitch when he wanted to be, and you hated that side of your best friend. But at the same time, you knew how right he was.

You all drank a little after dinner. And after each other, and each other too, making it an almost daily practice after the meal for the next two weeks. Drinking, talking, and laughing, all together. But at no point did you manage to ask Sunghoon anything in particular. And he also didn't seem to mind interacting with you so much after the first time you met.

Sunghoon had been working with Heeseung in the same sector for just over a year and a half, and you realized – along with your two friends – that he was just as playful and fun as the boy and Jake. Putting the three of you together made for a good session of laughter and even adventure within the first two weeks.

You all explored the surroundings, hiking and recognizing places you'd only been to a few times before. Bathing in the waterfall on the nearby property, which was a friend of the Lee family, it wouldn't be a problem for anyone to feel uncomfortable, as Sunghoon said he was afraid of.

You also went into town to buy more drinks because, according to Jake, you needed to inaugurate the pier near the lake where you last barbecued – four days ago – during the night. And that's exactly where you were.

You had eaten enough and sat down on the beach chair they had put there for anyone who wanted one, smiling at Sunghoon who had sat down next to you.

"Would you like one?" he offered a can of beer and you readily accepted, thanking him before opening your can and drinking some of the contents.

Watching your friends laughing and roasting the rest of the meat they had bought, joking with each other, and feeling your chest relax when you saw Hyojin smile. The big reason for this trip was right there, leaning on Jake's shoulder as he laughed at something Sora had said.

"Heeseung told me" Sunghoon snapped you out of your thoughts, making you look at him quickly as you missed the scene where Hyojin was hugging his brother "I felt his anger."

"I don't know who was angrier than Hyojin" you sighed heavily, drinking beer at the same second as Sunghoon, almost as if you were both a reflection of each other.

"He's a piece of shit" the boy muttered "I only met him once when Heeseung took him out to the bar" he chewed his lower lip as he was distracted by the four of them running along the pier, well away from the grill now "It was a bit… Egocentric."

"Disgusting" you added.

Swearing at Seungho was therapeutic for you, and you were grateful to know that Sunghoon shared the same feeling. Well, anyone in their right mind would feel that way because what that idiot had done to your best friend was unimaginable.

"Hey" Jake approached the two of you, picking up a third chair to put on your other side and put you between him and Sunghoon.

"Why did you come here?" the boy asked Jake, seeing that he also had a beer in his hand, and then sighed.

Jake would have answered, but the scene in front of him spoke for itself. Heeseung, Sora, and Hyojin had taken off their shirts and jumped into the lake without warning. He didn't want to risk it as it was getting dark – and he wasn't that brave either – telling the three of them that he would sit down with you and Sunghoon to talk.

"What were you talking about?" he then asked.

"We were cursing Seungho" you said cheerfully, watching Jake smile.

"He's such a asshole!" Jake stretched out, feeling his bones crack in his body after a while. Then he decided to drink some of his beer "I regret holding Heeseung back in college when he wanted to hit him."

"What? Heeseung wanted to hit Seungho?" you were shocked by this information, asking Jake what else the boys were hiding from you.

Talking about college was nostalgic for all the things you all experienced together. They were long years together and every moment counted for a lot and strengthened everything you had built up to that point. This made Sunghoon's mind click, looking at Jake as he finished telling a story he'd experienced with Sora where they'd almost broken up because she hadn't let him skip literature class – it was her favorite subject.

"I know it's none of my business, but can I ask you something?" Sunghoon scratched his head for almost two whole weeks at that. Jake even imagined it, so he stifled a smile as you looked at the boy and nodded slowly, smiling lazily as you felt your mouth start to go numb from the beer.

Jake got up to walk the few steps to the cooler where there were more drinks to grab three more beers for him, you and Sunghoon before turning back quickly, just in time to hear the other ask.

"What did you and Heeseung have in university?"

Your neck could break with the speed at which you turned your head to look at Jake.

"What? I didn't say anything at all" he defended himself, raising his hands after sitting down and opening his drink.

What had happened between you and Heeseung in university? That was a while ago, almost two years to be exact, in the last year. You never thought you'd have to relive that thought, even though it came back to you every time you met him. But you tried very hard not to think about it while the boy was around.

Looking at Sunghoon now, you sighed and paid more attention to the can of beer Jake had handed you as you opened it.

"We kissed once—"

"Several times" Jake interrupted you "For almost a year."

Sunghoon laughed at the astonished look you made, and also because Jake was very airy before he got a load of water on his shorts. You mentally thanked for always having a bottle of water nearby when you drank, and now you didn't mind emptying it on your best friend.

"Shut up."

"Tell Sunghoon the truth, you don't have to lie since there's only the three of us here" Jake wanted to scream because the water was freezing his entire thigh due to the wet fabric in contact with his skin.

You laughed a little, pressing your fingers on the can and then looking at Sunghoon.

"We kissed a few times and… That's it."

There was a little silence, but not much because Jake snorted.

"Can I be honest again? For you?" you rolled your eyes, seeing that sparing details of events wouldn't work very well since your friend would tell you everything himself.

"You don't have to if you two don't want to" Sunghoon laughed, finishing his beer "It's just that he tells me some things, just like I tell him too. And just… He told me about you two in college and I wanted to draw some conclusions."

"Which ones?" you asked.

But there was no answer. His complicit look with Sunghoon indicated that the two of them had already had that conversation, all that was needed were a few answers that they were looking for… But which ones? What were the answers they wanted? Because you had no idea.

Getting involved with Heeseung wasn't something you regretted telling no one about. No, on the contrary. It all happened so suddenly that you didn't know how to say it.

The cliché trope of dating your best friend's brother, getting involved, or falling in love, happened long after you met him. And it was so by chance.

It had been two years since you met Hyojin and, consequently, Heeseung too. You knew he'd had lots of girlfriends, and you'd also had a few affairs here and there, but no one ever insisted on the two of you. Jake didn't joke about it when you all went out together and neither did Hyojin smile mischievously at you or her brother when it was just the two of you at the end of the party to leave, since she went with Seungho and Jake went with Sora.

But one day, after an intense week of tests for you and a troubled break-up with Heeseung, everything came together and contributed to you waking up in his bed. That had been the promise of a single night.

That lasted for months, practically a year of involvement between you and him. But that ended suddenly. Heeseung seemed to be afraid of something and you, worried about what he might feel, decided to give him the space he needed. You were both afraid of breaking up with your group of friends, so getting back to normal was a bit difficult for both of you, but in the last year since you finished college, you and Heeseung had done very well in maintaining a friendship, even if you were now being teased by Hyojin and Jake.

This was something you managed – pretended, to be precise – to avoid at all costs. But it was a big lie when your cheeks got hot or when you smiled awkwardly at anything your friends said. Hiding it may have been easy, but not feeling it was even harder.

"Right" Sunghoon sighed after you told him, with Jake's excited help, about your history with Heeseung "After that I concluded that I was right."

"What did we talk about?" Jake asked, seeing the boy agree with a nod and a victorious smile on his lips.

"Okay, gentlemen conversationalists, what were you talking about? May I ask?"

You might if it weren't for the return of the other three friends, soaking wet and giggling while Heeseung, the most provocative, shook his wet hair over Sunghoon.

"Aren't you going in the water?" Hyojin asked as he looked at you, smiling and almost shaking her chin. You laughed and got up from your chair.

"No, and I think you need to dry off or you'll get sick."

"Sick? I never get sick" Heeseung hugged Sunghoon who had stood up, hearing his friend's shout that he didn't want to get his clothes wet.

You rolled your eyes at him, not caring so much about the two of them teasing as you tried to settle down on the pier as best you could. Trying to forget the conversation you had a few minutes ago, while the reason for it was laughing and joking with Sunghoon, who looked at you now and then with a knowing smile.

Coughing. Tremors and a high fever. That's how Heeseung felt at dawn and throughout the day. He didn't want to get sick on his vacation trip, let alone spoil the outing everyone had planned to the nearby town center, where a spring fair was taking place.

He wanted to go along, getting out of bed a few times and being prevented by his grandmother from leaving. Heeseung could cry with the pain in his body as he sat up in bed after Grandma Lee left the room, giving Sunghoon a way in.

"What's up, man?" he sat on the edge of the bed, pressing his lips together to keep from laughing.

"What? Are you going to make fun of me too?" Heeseung coughed.

"I never get sick" Sunghoon tried to imitate Heeseung's voice, failing and laughing immediately afterwards. The other had nothing to object to.

"Seriously, I don't know what happened. What the fuck?" he whimpered as he threw his head back, the tip of his nose red because he'd lost count of how many times he'd blown.

"You dived into the lake at night, that's what happened," Sunghoon warned.

"I'm going to ruin your outing, aren't I? Fuck!" cursed the boy for a moment.

Sunghoon wanted to say no, maybe they could reschedule the tour for another day when Heeseung was feeling better. Especially since there were still many weeks until the end of their vacation, so everyone could go to the nearby city center afterward for the fair they had arranged. But before Sunghoon could even say anything, Heeseung was getting out of bed. With a lot of effort – and a little bit of crying – he leaned on his friend to stand up.

"Let's go to the living room, I think I can go with you."

Sunghoon rolled his eyes at his friend's stubbornness but wanted to let him walk as far as he could on his own to the living room where the whole group of friends were.

"Heeseung!" Hyojin was surprised when his brother reached the room, struggling to walk while coughing now and then.

"I couldn't keep him in the room" Sunghoon whispered.

"One thing you should learn about him is that he's stubborn as a rock" Sora hummed, receiving a roll of the eyes from Heeseung.

"I don't want you to miss the exit for me. I just—"

He raised his arms to signal something, but he was so weak and off balance that if it weren't for you and your body holding him up, Heeseung might fall. Your arms quickly circled his waist while Heeseung wrapped one of his arms around your shoulder, his face close to yours because of the position he was in.

"Are you okay?" he wasn't at all okay with that closeness, and he knew that the hot sensation on your face was a mixture of the fever and how beautiful you were next to him.

"Okay, how about we go later? Let's stay home and…"

"No way" Heeseung interrupted Jake, looking at him with great effort to look away from you at that moment, "I'll feel guilty if you all miss the tour because of me."

And it was true. Everyone knew that Heeseung wouldn't forgive himself for getting sick and making everyone stay because of him.

"I'll stay" you said without much thought.

"What?" Heeseung was the only one who seemed surprised by your decision because the other four smiled at your answer. Almost as if they had expected it.

"Yeah, I'll stay here with you" your voice was soft, almost a melody to Heeseung. You sat him down on the sofa to straighten his body and turned to his friends "You can all go and… I'll stay with Heeseung."

"Y/n" he called without much strength in his voice, you couldn't hear him. You had heard him, but you preferred to ignore it and focus on your friends and how they made sure they had their phones on and were ready to leave wherever they were and go to you and Heeseung.

It didn't take long for your friends to leave for their late afternoon stroll, which could last into the night and even the early hours of the morning, depending on where they had gone.

You didn't know what had made you stay – maybe you did, you just wanted to fool yourself a bit – so you chose to take care of Heeseung the right way. You went to his room and fetched a blanket, stretched it over your legs, and sat down next to him.

"Do you know what time granny Lee measured your fever?" you asked him, waiting for an answer that came in seconds "All right, I'll set the alarm clock to measure it again in a while" you clicked a few times on your cell phone to set the exact time you should measure the temperature again.

Heeseung picked up the remote control on the coffee table and turned on the television, watching something that might be interesting just so he wouldn't be watching you so much while you leaned back on the sofa.

"Do you want anything?" you asked him, engrossed in the old movie he'd decided to leave on since there wasn't much interesting to watch.

"I do, but will you promise not to fight me if I ask?" your stomach almost rolled over at the thought, and you felt your heart racing.

Heeseung noticed the stiffness in his body, knowing what was going through his head. He was going to ask exactly what you were thinking, but he didn't want to make you uncomfortable and it would be too bold after so long. Maybe the fever was messing with his head too much to think such a thing, so he had to act quickly so as not to get into a weird mood afterward.

"I feel like having some whisky" he whispered, "I haven't had any fever medicine yet, so… Could you get me some? Please?"

"Heeseung" you looked at him, the boy feeling his legs go limp with the intensity of your gaze. That would never change for him.

"Just a little, I promise I'll take the medicine later."

Maybe he would take the medicine after you insisted, or maybe he wouldn't and then you could turn to Hyojin to scold him. Either way, you got up and took the bottle of whisky from Heeseung, leaving it on the coffee table and sitting back down next to him.

This could have yielded a single glass, but he drank three. He measured the temperature – which was still high – and went for the fourth glass, but this time you managed to stop him. You pulled away from him while, under protest, you got up to finish Heeseung's drink.

"What… Did you say… Y/n" he whimpered as he quickly got up, falling onto the sofa and pulling the covers over his face.

Covered to the neck, Heeseung looked like a helpless little animal when you sat down next to him.

"I said one glass" you reprogrammed the clock on your cell phone to wake up for the third time and take your temperature again, hoping it had improved at least a little or you'd have to opt for a cold shower. Since Heeseung was drunk and couldn't take any medicine at the moment.

"It's okay, I exaggerated" he confessed.

I'm glad you know, you thought to yourself and let the television and the program playing play their part. Distracting the two of you while the hour passed.

Or at least it should.

Over time, Heeseung's body relaxed and he slid down the upholstery until he had the side of his thigh pressed against yours. You held your breath for a few seconds at the sudden contact but decided to let it pass since it was the only thing you felt from each other before he adjusted himself to sit up straight.

"Can I ask you something?" his voice was deep, his eyes focused on the crime series that was now on television. Heeseung could see the policemen running off without knowing where because their attention was focused on you sitting next to him.

"You can" you replied, looking at Heeseung's profile and holding back a sigh as you analyzed him. The pointed nose, the plump lips that puckered unconsciously as he thought.

You had already seen it up close and from every possible angle, but it was as if he managed to look even more handsome anyway.

"Have you ever really loved someone?" Heeseung's question made you stand still. If you were standing up or doing anything, you'd surely stop abruptly or drop whatever was in your hand in the same second "I mean really love, not be in a passion. I think they're different things, right?"

He stared at you after asking, and you didn't know you could feel your heart almost bursting out of your mouth with Heeseung's eyes so intensely on you.

"Why are you asking me this?" was the only thing that came out of your mouth without your voice sounding shaky and nervous.

Heeseung smiled awkwardly, looking down at his hands, which had pulled the blanket away from his body and even discarded the fabric on the other side of the sofa.

"Because I once asked Jake how you find out if you love someone" he said, "or what the difference is between infatuation and love. Love, really."

"You're not asking that because of the fight you had with Hyojin that day, are you?" it was your turn to ask, clicking in your mind the last heavy event between the Lee brothers. Hyojin had said something about him never being able to love and now with Heeseung's questions, you were starting to get confused, as well as nervous.

"Maybe" he shrugged, sighing quickly.

"Why? Have you ever really loved someone or did they just say it out of the mouth?"

Heeseung didn't want you to have asked that out loud, because he didn't want all the senses in your body to be like a magnet and for him to have slid down the sofa until he was even more glued to your body.

You don't know how or when the boy in front of you tilted his face towards you until Heeseung's warm breath hit your lips. You also don't know how you stood there, letting him come closer and one of his hands fit perfectly on your cheek.

"I never thought I could really love" he whispered, his warm lips sliding teasingly over yours. You fought fiercely against the urge to rush forward and kiss him, but at the same time you had to hold back as much as you could "I never thought I felt that way until—"

The alarm clock startled you both, causing Heeseung to move away so quickly that he almost threw himself across the sofa.

Recovering, you straightened your hair and clicked your phone so that the alarm would stop immediately. Your heart raced as you got up to get the thermometer and take Heeseung's temperature. He didn't take his eyes off you and remained still, knowing that you would do the same until you had finished checking.

"I think it's gone down" you showed him the numbers, seeing that it was a little better than before.

"Great, so can we pick up where we left off?" he grabbed your hand and pulled you closer to him. You wanted to continue, you wanted to hear more about what he had to say, but again the interruption surrounded you.

And this time by a group of friends who had just arrived from the city center.

The days went by without a hitch, without any uncomfortable interaction or even a tense moment between you and Heeseung. Although his words and gestures remained fresh in your mind, he didn't seem to mind treating you normally in front of his friends and sister.

Or at least that's what he wanted you to think. Because every time he went to the bathroom or walked away, you felt like screaming. Once again Heeseung was cowardly enough not to say anything at all to you. Once again he felt like he was picking up sand with his bare hands when he saw you become distant after that day in the living room of his grandmother's house.

Talking to Jake about his feelings and to Sunghoon about doing the right thing only made him feel even more stupid because he did everything the other way around. It wasn't possible that for his friends it was so simple and with him… It just didn't work.

Heeseung wanted to call you for a real talk, to look you in the eye once more and be able to say what he should have said over a year ago before deciding to walk away out of fear. You would laugh in his face and call him a coward just like Jake did. All right, his best friend had done it to lighten the mood after an almost two-hour lecture on how Heeseung hadn't understood any of the signs of feelings.

Clear signs that he really was in love, finally, with the first person in his life.

A long sigh leaves Heeseung's lips as he looks at the scene in front of him. Back on the pier in front of the lake, he preferred to sit on the beach chair and watch from afar. He couldn't help but notice how close Hyojin had become to Sunghoon over the last few days; perhaps it was the conversation or even something else. Neither of them had said anything, but he wasn't going to interfere either, after all, she was an adult and was going through a bad time. Sunghoon could help her in ways that neither he nor Jake could.

And speaking of Jake, he and Sora were frustrated with the attempts at a knitting class you were giving them. The only boy in that class cursed to the heavens when he missed a stitch and Sora undid everything to start again. But Heeseung's attention was on your laughter. How nice it was to hear it every time you tried to comfort them, saying that you'd been through it all years ago when Grandma Lee taught you to knit.

Heeseung remembers. Every little detail of that day and how he sat next to you to learn too. Or to be near you because the other four had gone out in couples and he didn't want to be the only one watching.

You were calm, you were good with the needle and the stitches Grandma was giving you.

"What design do you want me to knit?" you asked him after a few days, learning the basics and doing small things.

"Hm…" Heeseung seemed to think for a moment, looking ahead and focusing on how Jake was desperately shouting for Hyojin to help him down from the tree. He laughed a little along with you before returning his attention to the previous conversation. Heeseung bit his lip as he stared at you, a smile playing on his face as he thought desperately that he could kiss you at that very moment "How about a heart?"

"You want me to knit you a heart? That's fine" and it was then that you practice on the small knitting square was all done in hearts. At Heeseung's request.

He wouldn't tell you that he'd kept the first one you made in his closet drawer, even though Jake had already seen it and Sunghoon too, the last time they got drunk and he told you everything he felt.

"I don't think it's fair, you learned all this stuff in, I don't know… how long?" Jake was angry with himself for not being able to get a single point right.

"Less than a month" Heeseung let slip, not caring about the surprised looks coming from you and Sora "She knitted some hearts and granny was so proud because neither Hyojin nor I could learn. While y/n did it in such a short time."

Now Jake was surprised by the whole thing. Not with the heart information because he had already seen it, but at how it had all come out so casually from Heeseung's lips.

He remembered so many details that if he told them out loud, it might complicate things. Or not, because then you'd know he'd never forgotten.

"I'm so good now that I can knit a cap, for example" you shrugged as you got up from the pier floor, walking in the direction Heeseung was now with Jake. Sora had gone inside to get a coat.

"Do you have black lines?" Heeseung asked.

You looked for a while at some scraps you had in your hands, but none of them were black threads. Then, smiling awkwardly, you denied it.

"When we get back I can buy some and you can make one for me?"

"Sure" you smiled so beautifully that he clutched the arms of his chair tightly to stop himself from getting up and grabbing you right there.

"Dude, be less obvious" Jake said after you had followed the same path as Sora into the house, probably putting away your knitting things since you didn't need to leave everything there anymore.

"With what?" Heeseung asked.

"I don't know, with all this longing for y/n" he shrugged and then relaxed "If you haven't said anything about how you feel, I guess you could try going slowly."

Heeseung remained quiet, watching as Sunghoon's arm circled Hyojin's shoulders and she snuggled close to him.

"All this time you've been giving me advice and I just can't follow it" he laughed humorlessly, his fingers softening on the arms of the chair and his whole body relaxed against the backrest. Heeseung closed his eyes.

"Because you're a jerk and you're afraid of what you might hear from her" Jake mirrored his friend's actions, laying his head on the back of the chair and closing his eyes "I'll never get tired of repeating that" he whispered, opening one of his eyes to see if either of you were coming back from the house. Taking advantage of the fact that they weren't, he continued: "I almost peed my pants when I confessed my feelings for Sora. My heart raced so fast I thought I was going to have a heart attack."

And that really was it. Jake told that story and wasn't ashamed if it meant he could help Heeseung with how he felt about you. Sometimes he knew that he felt the same way about Jake just by being in his presence, but it seemed as if the words were disappearing from his mouth.

"So she said she felt the same way and look where we are now."

"You're both beautiful, dude" Heeseung said sincerely, he loved his friends.

"And you and y/n too" he said back "I love you both and together with Hyojin I hope every day that this will be resolved soon" Jake straightened up in his chair and turned his face towards his friend, biting his lower lip to suppress a smile "You just have to take the initiative and make it work. You won't lose another year for fear of what might happen."

Lose another year. Heeseung didn't want it to be that long, he didn't think he could bear to be around you for another year without doing anything. Especially after what happened in the living room of his grandmother's house during the vacations.

He had to do something.

Getting back into the routine of work wasn't so bad, even with the day-to-day rush and even some unforeseen events in the sectors where they worked. It wasn't out of the ordinary and was soon resolved.

You were happy when you started seeing Sunghoon more often when he showed up at your apartment saying he wanted to take Hyojin out for coffee. Or even calling you for dinner somewhere because he didn't want to go home yet.

Sunghoon called you a few times too, but you knew it was only out of cordiality and you politely declined invitations to stay in the comfort of your apartment. Texting Jake and telling him about the – again – casual meeting they were having.

Hyojin deserved to be well somehow. And even if it was casual, it was going into the second month in the blink of an eye. Now she was able to show Sunghoon a little more affection in front of her friends and brother, hugging him from behind when he was sitting at the dinner table. Or letting him kiss her forehead in an act of affection when they were standing in line at the amusement park waiting for their ride.

Sora and Heeseung thought it was so cute the way the two of them were treating each other. You and Jake, on the other hand, liked to make fun of her because you heard Hyojin whining that she would never allow herself to sigh for another man. But it turned out that Sunghoon was another man and he was taking very good care of her.

Given the clichéd circumstances, Heeseung sat face to face with Sunghoon one day, listing all the atrocities he would do to his friend if he hurt his sister's heart which was still being mended.

Sunghoon, for the first time, spoke with conviction that he wouldn't do any of those things. Without mentioning the word casual or saying that they were just friends. Sunghoon agreed with everything Heeseung was saying and thanked him for his trust because he knew that, if his friend didn't do such an atrocity, he still had Jake and you to complete the job. Along with Sora who could very well devise an evil plan because he knew what she was capable of.

"She wouldn't do that, would she?" Sunghoon asked the two boys one day when they were all sitting around the dining table in their apartment because Hyojin had decided to cook. She had gone to the bathroom and Sora went over a plan in which she would pluck out every strand of his hair, depending on his mood; with a machine or tweezers.

Heeseung and Jake laughed nervously, denying it immediately.

"It would, and I think it would help in the process" you smiled at him, seeing him wince and try to say something.

But you all knew that Sunghoon wouldn't do anything to harm Hyojin because he started to like her. It was all so natural that the next thing he knew, he was confessing his feelings after four months of being together and she – for all his happiness – was feeling safe to say the same.

Hyojin was still afraid of what had happened to her, but after talking for hours with Heeseung – he ended up confessing how felt about you too – it led to a long time of crying, a huge apology and she encouraging him to talk to you. Then he encouraged she to give herself to Sunghoon little by little and if she was afraid, she could go back.

And that's what she was doing, gradually letting go as the relationship stabilized.

"I think I'm having a dejavú" Hyojin sighed as she filled wine glass, handing it to you and then filling hers too.

"Really? Why?" you drank a little, feeling the bitter taste of the dry wine run down your tongue. You used to prefer mellow, but today it was your best friend who chose it.

"The two of us, glasses of wine, here in the kitchen" she looked around and so did you, laughing as you remembered the six bottles you'd bought last time "Now we're here and I'm happy to be drinking."

"And I want it to always be like this" you confessed.

The smile on your face only showed that you were telling the truth. Not only you, but all your friends wanted Hyojin to be feeling well.

"Oh, it's Sunghoon" she said to you when her cell phone started ringing, asking for a moment before she could answer it. Talking to him for a while, you didn't even pay much attention to the conversation, too focused on your glass and how much the bitterness of the wine was starting to taste.

You even poured a little more and started drinking again.

"So?" you asked when she hung up.

"He and the boys want to go out clubbing" Hyojin drank all of her wine, refilling her glass "They asked us to come along."

"Now?" Hyojin nodded in agreement before going back to drinking.

"I'll stay here if you don't want to go" she shrugged quickly.

You had no business going out, especially since you were starting to get hot from the wine. It would even be more fun to be with the boys, although you also loved Hyojin's company – so much so that you lived together – but with more people, it would always be nice.

So you didn't have long to think about whether or not to go, finish off the bottle of dry wine, and run to your rooms to change.

In record time you and Hyojin were at the door of the nightclub and met Sora waving in the queue, running up to her so that she could hug you both at once.

"Are they inside?" Hyojin asked.

"Yes, I was saving a place for you two in the queue" she smiled, keeping her arm around you while Hyojin touched up her lipstick "They arrived not even twenty minutes ago."

The music was muffled outside, but as soon as you entered, the loudness of the speakers gave you the sensation that every organ in your body was vibrating.

Hyojin exchanged a message with Jake to see where they were and could find them without too much effort. The boy soon replied to the location and the three of you went to meet them.

Sliding past dancing bodies, drunk people, and false advances that Sora was expert at deflecting, either by being very direct and saying no thank you or simply pushing the inconvenient person who was trying at all costs to get into the pants of one of the three of you.

"We're here" Sunghoon waved from the table near the bar where only he and Jake were standing. You didn't even realize it when you approached them.

You and Sora greeted Sunghoon first and you quickly went to hug Jake, so they could greet their girlfriends with more delay than they wanted. Jake and Sora were already a common sight for all of you, but seeing Hyojin kiss Sunghoon right in front of your eyes was something new. Cute, and it couldn't go unnoticed.

You and Jake made fake vomiting noises while you could see Sunghoon's smile against Hyojin's lips before he stopped kissing you.

"You two are horrible" Sora tapped Jake on the shoulder to scold him, then glared at you.

It was then that they realized Heeseung was missing. If the boys had called everyone together, he would have been there. And indeed he was.

But your eyes couldn't believe that his hand was holding a woman's waist while she whispered something in his ear.

Your bile could be felt from your throat and you swore that the dizziness you felt could well have been from the wine earlier, but no. Why did you have to feel this way just now? Just at this moment. You've been out with your friends so many times and Heeseung was there, why did it have to be like this?

The only one to notice your discomfort was Jake, because the others got into such a lively conversation that they didn't even notice you standing there and looking in the direction your best friend was looking. He came closer, slipping one of his arms around yours to entwine them.

"It's not that, y/n" he said.

"I'm seeing it with my own eyes" you said back, pressing your lips together as Jake started to lead you towards the bar.

But before you could get there, Heeseung broke away from the girl and turned around so quickly that he almost crashed into you and Jake.

"Y/n" he ignored his friend's presence completely.

Jake took that warning as a cue to let go of your arm and get drinks, leaving the two of you standing there. He handed you a glass and left with two others, probably for Sora and Hyojin, you didn't even remember if he'd said anything before returning to the table.

Heeseung's eyes were on you the whole time, not saying a word as he alternated between looking at you and your mouth.

"I dismissed her" he said after a while, a little too loudly because of the music playing, afraid that you wouldn't hear him.

You didn't know why he had said it and you didn't know why it had, in a way, relieved your racing heart.

"You…"

"Hand around the waist? Whisper in the ear?" he ran one hand through his hair, easily messing up the strands that were beginning to grow "I held her because she almost fell, and she was whispering about how faithful I was to my girlfriend. That she admired that because she couldn't find a guy like that."

"Your girlfriend?" you frowned and felt like an idiot grimacing because the laugh Heeseung let out at that moment just made you want to disappear.

You had shown jealousy indirectly, and yet he had noticed.

The boy then approached you, took the glass from your hand, and drank some of the drink Jake had chosen for you. He then leaned close enough to brush his lips against yours, which were so cold from the drink that you almost moaned at the contact.

"Not officially yet" he said, sliding his mouth down to kiss the corner of your lips.

Before you could say anything else, Heeseung grabbed your free hand to pull you back to the table. Heading back to his friends to enjoy the rest of the evening.

Heeseung was determined. He couldn't wait any longer to tell you everything he felt for you. The day at the nightclub had made it clear that, at the very least, you felt something for him.

Attraction, passion, love. He didn't know. But there was something inside you that screamed his name somehow, and Heeseung wanted to find out.

Encouraged by Jake and Sunghoon, he finally rushed out of the house. As he stopped by the store to buy the pretext for that conversation, he sent a message to Hyojin.

I'm going out with Sunghoon, the apartment is all yours… Except my room! He laughed as he passed the cashier and paid for everything before getting in his car and driving to where you lived.

This should have happened a while ago, he couldn't have waited that long because the fear was still eating away at him. What if you could have cooled your feelings for him and confused everything? Maybe Heeseung had misunderstood and you only had a little empathy for him. Would empathy be right? Would empathy let him almost kiss you, touch your face, and brush his lips against yours?

No, Heeseung. He didn't want to sabotage himself so soon before he was standing in front of your apartment door.

His trembling fingers rang the doorbell and balanced the bag he was carrying.

Your footsteps could be heard from inside the apartment, followed by I'm coming, which you answered, probably putting something away or straightening up before opening the door.

Heeseung didn't hold back a loud sigh when he saw you. You looked beautiful. Even wearing sweatpants and a blue tank top that he remembered well – the tank top of the friendship between you and Hyojin. It was the color you two shared, by the way.

"Heeseung?" you were surprised to see him, but you still made way for him to enter.

"I thought… Well…" he took a deep breath, thinking about Jake's words.

Try it, man. Say everything you feel.

And then the little lecture Sunghoon gave him two days ago.

If you don't, you'll never know how she feels. And worse, you'll live with the ghost of a relationship that could be working just because you're afraid to acknowledge that, finally, you know what love is.

"I thought you could knit my cap now" he held up the bag, pulling out the black threads he had said a long time ago "Would you mind?"

Your broad smile indicated that, of course, you would never mind doing this for him.

"You've come at a good time, by the way" Heeseung sat down on the sofa while you picked up the bag to look at the things he had brought. Your smile still lingered as he remembered all the sewing details he could buy, even the support – which you had – to put on your thumb so it wouldn't hurt while knitting.

"Have I arrived? Why?" he asked, turning to you as you sat down next to him on the sofa.

"I ordered food" it was Heeseung's turn to smile broadly "Hyojin's out and I didn't want to cook, so I guess I ordered too much. Or enough for both of us."

For both of us. Referring to Heeseung as a collective together with you made his heart race in such a silly way that he swore he was shaking a little. Then he sighed, nodding in agreement when you told him to wait.

Would go upstairs to get your needles and whatever else was missing, which he hadn't remembered to buy so that you could start sewing the knitted cap.

He didn't want to get in the way of your sewing, so he was in charge of doing everything while you started.

It was Heeseung who went downstairs to get the food when you arrived. He was the one who set up the coffee table in the living room with all the utensils for the two of you to eat and he was the one who washed the dishes and got two bottles of beer from the fridge for the two of you to drink after eating.

His eyes met yours a few times while you stopped knitting, paying attention to the movie in front of you or what he had said about something from the day. It wasn't insignificant, but Heeseung couldn't think of much to tell you.

He wanted to talk about how his day at work had gone, but mostly he lamented how he felt like a coward and how Sunghoon cursed at him until it was time to leave. With Jake then? He couldn't tell you that he almost got beaten up by his best friend because Heeseung said he'd give up, let you live in peace, and wouldn't go after you to make you suffer.

So he only told you superficially, how it had been at work, how he almost broke the diffuser he'd won from Sora for a bet they'd made – he'd gotten sick eating four snacks in a row – and how he needed a cap. Heeseung could buy anyone at the store, but having an initial reason to come to your apartment and talk to you seemed more convincing in his mind than simply picking up any ready-made cap.

Not to mention that it would have a whole feeling because it had been made by you. By your hands. The hands he kept looking at while traced stitches and knots, wound the thread, and held the wooden knitting needle tightly.

"Is it okay if it's not ready today?" you asked, catching Heeseung off guard by hearing your voice so suddenly. He knew you had caught him staring at your hands, so all he could do was swallow and go back to watching the TV.

"Yeah" he replied briefly, letting all the air out of his lungs before saying, "Because I came to talk to you, the cap was just a pretext."

You didn't have to be a good reader to know that you had stopped all your sewing to look at him at that moment. Heeseung didn't want to move at all, let alone look at you while he heard his name called a few times.

What do you mean by a pretext? Was he just going to say that and be quiet, without answering any calls of his name?

You got tired of calling his name for the fourth time and decided to get up, dropping the needles and everything else you were holding, deciding to get another drink or anything that would keep you focused other than on the man who was ignoring you.

"Go Heeseung, you can do it" he said to himself as he punched the sofa cushions uselessly before getting up "Jake did it, Sunghoon is doing it… It's your turn!" he uttered those words as he walked to the kitchen in the slowest steps he had ever taken in his life.

Not even a boring college class could make him walk as slowly as he did. Heeseung felt pathetic for that.

Leaning against the doorframe, he could observe you a little more closely. Your fingertips played through your hair while the freshly opened bottle of beer sat on the kitchen counter. You tidied up the strands, loosening them and letting them cascade down your shoulders and back. You now held the beer bottle to your lips and took a long sip, as if it would help you relax while you finished swallowing and turned away.

"Fuck, Heeseung" he laughed, disentangling yourself from the doorframe to take a few slow steps toward him.

He didn't approach slowly, but close enough to get to you.

"I'm sorry, I—" he took a deep breath, alternating his gaze between your lips and your eyes. This didn't go unnoticed by you, but you decided not to say anything and just let him finish speaking "I just want to talk to you and I don't know where to start."

You laughed humorlessly, picking up the beer bottle again and taking another sip.

"How about the beginning?" the lazy smile, the shrug, and the lips pink from the pressure of the bottle made Heeseung sigh. It was now or never.

Then he came close enough to use one hand to grab your waist, pulling you towards him. The other went quite freely to the bottle you were holding so that he could drink, finishing off the contents in just three sips.

It wasn't a time for protest, but he knew you'd swear at him if you had the chance.

With a remnant of courage and his hand still on your waist, Heeseung used what strength he had to pick you up and sit you on the kitchen worktop, being able to stand between your legs and at the perfect height to lean over and get his face close to yours.

"Okay, we started in our last year of university, then" he said, this time staring into your eyes as he began to explain himself.

Heeseung had his first girlfriend when he was fifteen. An elementary school girl he met through some friends and suddenly they were together. Everything was going so well in their relationship until the girl told him she loved him. He could have said it back or even said it wasn't the time to say it back, but instead, Heeseung laughed. He didn't know if it was out of nervousness or because he found it bizarre that one person loved another like that, but he laughed. And that was the first time someone had broken up with him like that.

During high school, he also had other relationships. The brief ones couldn't be counted because there was no intense feeling, but the girls he spent a good few months with could all be considered to have ended the same way.

"I love you, Heeseung" they would say, their gaze not lying. A glow so intense and beautiful, Heeseung was envious because he felt that they all loved him.

"I… I'm sorry" was one of the answers he gave, if he could. Because silence often resulted in a slap or relentless tears that he couldn't get them to stop.

In university, his biggest disappointment was a few months before he had a relationship with you. Heeseung seemed to like his girlfriend, because he introduced her to everyone. Even you knew her, letting the girl join you for lunch a few times just because she wanted to be close to Hyojin.

Heeseung looked smitten in the eyes of all of you, telling you how much he liked her and how special she was. But as soon as those three words came out of his mouth, he froze.

It wasn't possible that a simple I love you could send Heeseung into a panic. This time he was sensible enough to talk to her and tell her that he didn't feel the same way.

At least she didn't slap you, he remembers Sora saying when he was crying in Jake's apartment, a week before he went to that party.

Maybe love wasn't for him and that was okay. All was not lost because Heeseung had managed to live well up to that point and he couldn't let it ruin his last year of university and, consequently, his future. So he decided that he would have fun, be with his friends, and not care about anything until he had to.

Waking up with you in his bed had been a shock because the two of you had known each other since the early days. You were Hyojin's best friend, you always treated him well and you respected Heeseung just as he respected you all the time. Perhaps circumstances led you both to do it and the relief that came when neither of you regretted it was indescribable. Then it happened again. Again and again it became so frequent that the two of you began to relate to each other beyond partying and drinking.

More often than not, you'd wake up in Heeseung's bed and he'd stay at your university apartment for a few days to sleep with you or just hang out.

You two are dating indirectly, Hyojin joked, which neither you nor he denied. So it went on until Heeseung felt strange. He felt an absurd need to be with you, his heart would race just to see you or feel you.

Of course, this was normal when you liked someone, Heeseung had already felt something like this… Hadn't he? No! He'd never felt it at that intensity.

"Jake, I need help" he punched the door to his best friend's room, grateful enough that it was open and he was alone, otherwise it would have been bad to ask Sora to leave because he needed to cry a little in Jake's bed.

"What happened?" the boy asked laughingly, but then began to worry because Heeseung seemed to be short of breath "Shit, dude. Breathe with me, okay?" he shook Heeseung with a notebook that was on his computer desk.

He seemed to be hyperventilating as he tried to breathe, counting in and out as Jake accompanied him. After a while he managed to calm down, sitting down on Jake's bed and watching his friend pick up the gaming chair to sit in front of him, the subject began.

"How do I feel when I love someone?" he asked.

"Heeseung" Jake said "Aren't you confusing feeling with passion again? I told you they're different things—"

"No bro, it's serious" Heeseung's eyes were already watering, not believing what was finally coming out of his mouth "How do I know that what I feel for y/n is love? Because I'm scared…"

Jake smiled broadly, explaining it to him in the next second.

Neurochemically, the brain reacts to the action by changing certain neurotransmitters. We then have an increase in dopamine, as well as rising levels of endorphin and oxytocin, the hormone of love, which increases feelings of attachment, well-being, and security.

Heeseung looked at Jake adoringly, listening to him explain everything he wanted to understand. It was as if he were at a consult with doctor Jake Sim.

There are also some signs, not neurochemically speaking, but which say a lot about how you found love. For example, you both feel comfortable even when you're silent. You make her feel good, in every way. And she does the same with you. You both feel free to be who you are, without fear of judgment or any bad thoughts. You always see her as one of your priorities or she does the same for you. You both admire each other. There's no room for jealousy – at this point, Heeseung sniffled a little – you don't think about what your old relationships were like either. And, most importantly.

That pause made Heeseung freeze, Jake's smile never leaving his face as he slid the gaming chair until he was kneeling next to Heeseung.

"It's the first time you've felt like this."

He knew it was. He knew that, for the first time, he felt like he loved someone.

Because everything happened so naturally. The casual way you treated him, the way you took care of him even though you didn't need to, and how you understood how he felt. It was strange that you cared so much about him like that, or took care of him down to the smallest detail.

Heeseung couldn't tell Jake how it happened when the exact moment was that he started to love you. If it was because you listened to everything he had to say and, even though you didn't understand, you smiled and asked him. You asked him to explain and took an interest in subjects that Heeseung swore no one liked to hear him talk about.

Or he fell in love because you had the best kiss, the best touch, the best sex, the best connection that anyone had with him.

Heeseung didn't know. He could have fallen in love with you when he laid his head on your shoulder in the college library, feeling you stroke his hair while you finished an extremely boring report. But still taking the time to cuddle him without any shame when Sora and Hyojin were sitting right in front of you. Or when you fought with Hyojin not to eat the ramen you'd bought, but as soon as he arrived saying he was hungry, it was the first thing you cooked for him.

Heeseung simply didn't know. It had just happened and he was sure of it.

"So that time I got weird and we drifted apart, it was because I got scared" he played with his fingers on your sweatshirt-covered thigh. You listened intently as you gazed into his eyes, too inviting to look away "I didn't know how to act and I thought it would be better to get away because if I found out what I felt, I didn't want to know if you didn't feel the same or not."

"Why?" he heard your voice for the first time since he started talking.

"Because then I'd be feeling everything those girls felt when they confessed that they loved me, and I know how much that must have hurt" Heeseung pressed his lips together, a little nervously as he lowered his gaze to your mouth, looking into your eyes again "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry."

"For loving me?" you asked.

He denied it quickly, smiling simply as he rested his hands on the bench next to you.

"For running away. For being afraid and being a coward who couldn't bear the weight of loving someone for the first time."

As he spoke, you just nodded at every word he heard. Heeseung started to get even more nervous because nothing came out of your mouth apart from the questions he had asked and that could be interpreted as something negative. At least he had gotten everything out in the open and explained it in time.

"Can you say something? Even if it's to curse me, please" the plea was so cute that you laughed. The same action he did when someone confessed to loving him for the first time. Heeseung was almost peeing his pants like Jake when he talked to Sora, so he was really on the right track, he just needed to control himself a little.

"So can I curse you for taking so long?"

"You can" he said too quickly, mentally cursing himself for it because he sounded so desperate to hear your laugh again.

You didn't want to curse him, in fact, just watch how cute he was when he was nervous. But that would be too much torture and the pout he was making was already too kissable right in front of you.

Raising one hand to find his cheek, smoothing the skin with your thumb, you leaned in close enough to touch your lips to his. Heeseung whimpered in surprise at finally feeling that touch he had been longing for.

His hands grabbed your waist and pulled you tightly against his body at the same moment that the passage was given way and the two of you could intertwine your tongues.

The kiss, although full of longing, contained a slowness and sensuality that only the kiss shared with Heeseung could have. It was as if you were kissing him for the first time and all the flashbacks of all the kisses they had shared were running through your mind and him.

"Y/n…" he whispered against your lips after a while to catch his breath, his hands still on your waist while yours played with your hair and slid down to the nape of your neck.

"Yes?" you whispered back, feeling him brush his red, moist lips against yours once more.

"I love you" that phrase said for the first time to the person he was so sure of his feelings for. He just hadn't counted on it being in the kitchen of your house, of course, but the place was the least of it. As long as you were the one who heard it while he finished kissing you, everything made sense to him.

"Say it again, please" you asked.

Heeseung moved one of his hands up to the back of your neck, sliding his fingertips up to grab a good amount of your hair as gently as he could. He guided you so that he could kiss you again, this time with more intensity and urgency, pressing his lips and tongue together.

That way you knew he wanted to say everything at once. That he loved you, that he missed you, and that he wanted to apologize for the lost time. And you accepted it all because you were there with him.

"I love you, y/n" he said against your lips, panting and smiling as he slid his mouth over yours. "I love you so much" he kissed your skin, making your whole body shiver.

"I love you, Heeseung" you also whispered, feeling him squeeze the hand that remained around your waist and pressing you even tighter against him as if he wanted to merge your bodies into one.

Heeseung brought his face close to yours again, leaning his forehead against yours and smiling.

"You…"

"I love you" you repeated "I really love you."

"Then stay with me" Heeseung kissed your lips "To make up for how stupid I was to let you get away, I don't want it to happen again."

"You were an stupid" he murmured and you laughed against his mouth, watching him pull away enough to look at you. "But I'd be even more of an stupid to deny it."

"So we're together?" he almost shouted with happiness when you agreed, picking you up off the worktop and walking with you through the apartment to your bedroom.

"Yes, we are."

"And we're going to stay that way" he put you down as soon as he entered your room, looking you up and down and licking his lips at the sight "Because I love you and I want to remind you of that every day."

You were sure he would; with words, attitudes, anything that made you feel loved. And of course, you would do the same for him. Because you loved Lee Heeseung, just as he loved you.

#enhypen #enhypen fluff #heeseung fluff #enhypen heeseung #enhypen angst #enhypen au #enhypen scenarios #heeseung angst #lee heeseung fluff #lee heeseung angst #enhypen masterlist #enhypen x reader #heeseung fanfics #heeseung x reader #lee heeseung x reader #enhypen imagines #bay writes.

332 notes · View notes

am-i-the-asshole-official · 7 months ago

Note

WIBTA if I send in screen shots to someone that made a callout post about a former friend?

Please read this entire thing before your decision. I understand the "blurb" may make me seem like a backstabber and someone you wouldn't trust, but I have my reasons I'll detail why this person is a former friend.

I'm a former friend of someone we'll call Marie. Marie, idk how to explain it, but she kind of didn't care about anyone but herself. Anytime someone would talk about something she'd make it about herself and it was very annoying. Marie also would make a lot of us uncomfortable at times. She said some racial slurs to us various times and claimed it wasn't racist. One was towards me and I asked her not to, basically I told her she can't call me a slur because she's white and made me feel uncomfortable. The other was some Irish thing I had to google because our friend who is Irish was uncomfortable and I'm still horrified with what I saw.

Marie would reblog my vent posts on tumblr a lot. None was ever to console me. One was where she reblogged and said "this would be a good ice breaker for a date." I did go off on her since at the time I had such a nasty break up and my vent had absolutely nothing to do with that. Now here's the issue, besides reblogging my vent posts, someone archived her reblog of my vent posts on the wayback. Multiple ones. I contacted wayback, but they said they only delete archives if the blog owner makes a statement on their blog. For reference, i have had multiple chronic stalkers and Marie was very well aware of it. So I already had wayback not allow archives of my blog because one stalker was using it to archive everything on me online. So a stalker found a loophole in the form of Marie. Now, this was before Tumblr had allowed us to disable reblogs. So no jumping to the comments saying it's my fault when this was years ago before that function was available. So, Marie refused and told me its whatever and if anything they were probably archiving her edits despite all of the archives on her blog had my vents she reblogged, like every single time she reblogged it got archived.

Now lastly, Marie was one of those people who would never celebrate anyone's victories. It was so weird, someone could say "oh, I got a new camera for my photography" and she'd say something like "in 3rd grade someone shat on my camera, so I never got a new camera". It would make stuff so awkward and make us not want to talk in our discord. I got a scholarship one year she decided to go to school (she was 12 years out of highschool) and she lost her financial aid in one semester because she didn't do any of her school work! Yet somehow "the government picks favorites and doesn't want to pay people that deserve it". Her words, I was very offended since she knew I worked full time, was a POC, and was not eligible for financial aid. Let me have the scholarship win without making it about you!

So one day I just blocked her everywhere after I deleted the friend discord we had. It wasn't right after, I waited over a year and became more and more distant. She did contact me again, but surprise surprise, she wanted me to help build her a website for her "oni-sona". I declined and we haven't spoken since.

Now the callout part. She has a callout under her new alias and it has her previous too. In this callout it's talking a lot about how she treats people like shit and uses them for her own gain. It details as well to not support her or any of her projects because she steals (idk about that, I've personally never witnessed it, but I'm believing OP because everything else is true.)

Now, would I be the AH if I submit stuff to add to the callout? I was just going to send in how she reblogged my vents and someone archived them on wayback and she refused to contact way back to delete them despite knowing I had stalkers. Maybe I'll submit more stuff, but not caring I had stalkers is my biggest gripe and something I think should be added since she allowed my stalkers to do that.

#aita #am i the asshole

116 notes · View notes

sims3fiend · 2 months ago

Text

Sims3SettingsSetter thing

OLD POST REALLY SORRY IF YOU BOOKMARKED THIS I'M DUMB LMAO

NEW: https://www.tumblr.com/sims3fiend/764382296987025408/sims-3-settings-setter?source=share

---

Was bored ripping my hair out trying to do optimizations so I made this instead of anything actually worthwhile. For now it's mostly just a novelty. Rushing it out as I'm at work 4x12hrs starting tomorrow :)

This is a ALPHA IT SHOULD BE SAFE BUT IT MIGHT ALSO NOT BE. Speedwriting this post as I've gotta go sleepy.

Ignore the strange names for things i-it's an alpha.

Simsfileshare

To use, have an ASI loader like this or maybe this and shove it into the folder where the sims 3 exe is. Press insert to toggle

What it does:

Renderer Flags:

This was the original idea and what this was solely going to be. I found a function that set things like wireframe and other renderer things, so I made a script for it.

Some useful things it can do are turning drop shadows off, which is nice for reshade as it lets you do a better looking AO. Some people might find the pips, scene boxes, etc. useful but idk. Some of it is neat to look at I guess.

Game Values:

Just the one for now, max lots, it's still effected by the weird range/frustum cull thing that effects shadows, so outside of that range extra lots wont load. These are going to be static values that can be edited ingame. There's a few other ones I've found like ObjectSizeCullFactor but I need to properly test them. I'll also add some informational ones that can't be changed like loaded object count, etc.

Game Config:

This is where things went off the rails…

I'm hooking two functions here to grab and set boolean and string config values directly as they're called in memory, which is important as some are overridden or altered, or aren't listed in the files at all (ForceHighLODObjects my beloved). Currently it lists mostly everything in the SGR file and some ini settings. The boolean stuff is a pretty sure bet, the strings might be overwritten elsewhere idk. Please keep in mind that some of these settings can be very damaging to your game and sanity, do not use ones you don't recognize on a save you love.

To enable the config overwrite, tick the box next to it and hit save. They won't do anything unless the box is checked.

I'll be adding tunables (like LightingCommon) into the list… eventually. Currently they're a little… weirdly/interestingly/uniquely written in the decomp'd functions I've been looking at, so I haven't been able to get their values. There's probably a really simple way of doing all of this in one of the dlls or packages or something but idk. If you know lmk.

I'll also probably try and find the in memory location of some of them, so they can be changed ingame without the need to restart.

Issues:

If you have any problems/info please message me either on discord(fleshtexture) or tumblr ! Keep in mind it's still an ALPHA (or whatever) and I haven't really tested it that extensively.

Known problems:

Config sorting is yucky

Code looks yucky, weird names for things, don't look until I rewrite!

There was a freezing issue due to how I was hooking d3d9 but I think I fixed it? Idk I've never used imgui before.

#sims 3 #sims 3 mods #ts3 #sims3 #another rambling post #auuuuuuuuhhh #im forgetting something idk #goodnight

54 notes · View notes

donascozylivingroom · 11 months ago

Text

AFFIRM ONE WORD FOR ALL UR DESIRES

I think I found a new way of manifesting that involves robotic affirming, the list method and code words.

I thought like a week ago, could we just create one word affirmations? Because our subconscious knows what we are referring to anyways? Like instead of 'i am beautiful" to affirm something like "beautiful", if u know what it means to u.

So yesterday I saw a post someone made about this subject, affirming just one word, so it was a big confirmation, and I thought like why don't I make a list of all my desires and write down the new assumption that every time I think this new code word (any word u decide on, like strawberry, blueberry, anything), it means/I assume my entire list is my now reality.

I wrote my list in affirmation format so I added that every time I think/repeat the code, all affirmations in 'my list' repeat 10.000 times in my subconscious mind.

So imagine saying it super fast while lying in bed for 10 mins? Pretty sure u can get 1000 repetitions in but u shouldn't force urself to, it is already repeating 10k times when u say it once.

Idk I put everything on my list from weight loss to dream life, money, clothes, Pinterest desires etc.

I also put affirmations for my family and like "everything works out in my favor" and they've been bothering me much less in those 24 hrs I've been affirming.

Also lost weight visibly.

I'm a big persistence gal so I am ready to get everything on my list, will update.

I saw here on Tumblr (I'm new to it) about putting the void off the pedestal, well I included affirmations about all my desires being off the pedestal.

I also added happiness, health and most importantly, safety.

But a lot was about my selfish material desires teehe

I won't say my code word, cause it's personal, but if u wanna do this choose something short that resonates and lights u up, that u can easilly link to the list.

The way I did my list is I wrote all my desires in affirmation format but left space at the top to write something along the lines of "every time I affirm this code in my mind it means that all the affs in the following list are already my reality" u can add "no matter how long the list is"

Of course u can affirm "all my wishes come true" and skip the list method but for me it was fun and I like being a bit more in control of what manifests.

#loa #loassumption #law of assumption #the list method #manifesting #manifesation #affirmations #affirm and persist #affirmdaily #persistence #affirmyourreality #robotic affirming #material possessions

199 notes · View notes

eetherealgoddess · 10 months ago

Note

helloo, I just want to tell you I've been your fan since I downloaded tumblr. I can't, your fanfics are to die for. 😭 I'm sorry, I've been the one liking your stories from the start, I hope it doesn't bother you and I'm sorry if it does.

can I request a really really dark supernatural au smut bonten x fem reader? I can't explain how much I love your supernatural au fanfics😭

Although idk who you are specifically, I appreciate all your likes and the request so you don’t have to be sorry!! I embrace all feedback!! Unfortunately, I don’t think I made this dark enough, but I hope you enjoy it anyway!! ♡︎♡︎♡︎

Y’all it’s wild cuz blood actually makes me queasy and uncomfortable. Especially gore and yet I write and read it even though I gotta pause to breathe from time to time lmao. This one is FULL of blood and gore. So be mindful!! ꨄꨄꨄ

ꨄBlood Thirstyꨄ

Oneshot - Yandere Bonten Djinn Au

❦Your blood is enticing to Bonten❦

Sano Manjiro, Hanemiya Kazutora, Sanzu Haruchiyo, & Haitani Brothers x Reader

MY TR FANDOM WORKS ARE ONLY ON TUMBLR, AO3, AND WATTPAD UNDER EETHEREALGODDESS! REPORT IF YOU SEE IT POSTED UNDER ANYONE ELSE BUT ME!!!

The male leads are Djinn, based off of the show Supernatural, though I’ve created my own version for the story. I’ve never watched the show but I searched up supernatural monsters and found Djinn.

In this story, they’re tattooed beings who drink blood and eat flesh. They trap their victims by luring them with their glowing eyes that cause a hypnotic trance. Their tattoos will glow the same color as their eyes. They can only be killed with a silver knife laced with an antidote created by Djinn slayers.

Djinn are not mine nor is this the original type of creature. There’s also another definition that has nothing to do with the show so you should research that if you want to find out because I don’t have enough info on that to be able to explain it.

Not fully proofread

I apologize if I get any Japanese etiquette or culture wrong, I literally have to research the culture for some of my fandom stories so if anything is wrong, please excuse my ignorance.

Notice:

✩Y/n is 18+. I picture her as a black female but you can see her however.

✩Some parts of the story may not be realistic or factual. After all, this is a work of fiction.

✩Although it's a dark 'romance,' I do not condone any of the behavior displayed.

✩Dark content such as: gore, violence, triggering topics, graphic scenes, vulgar language, explicit sexual content, etc.

✩There may be scenes that involve non con and/ or dubcon so don’t read if that makes you uncomfortable

✩That being said, this story is for 18+ only.

Enjoy!

Blood Thirsty

You were quiet, hand covering your own mouth as your eyelids flutter closed. You lean your back against the shelf of books, hiding in an aisle of the abandoned library as you sit with your knees to your chest. You contain your vomit as you listen to the sounds of your friend's flesh ripping apart, the blood splattering against the floors as the putrid smell of death reaches your nose. Your other hand is placed against your pounding heart as your body tenses, hair sticking up as you prevent yourself from having an anxiety attack.

Earlier, you and your friends had gone to a local nightclub just to get out and have fun. Because the night club is owned by Djinn yakuza members, it was a sacrificial night, the full moon being the reason for this massacre. A ritual that was made into an agreement between humans and Djinn. Djinn can survive off of animal prey, which is what they eat until the night it’s time to feed. You had no idea the building was owned by not only a criminal organization but Djinn creatures at that. Not until one of your friends said, “Who knew Djinn could give us such a great time?”

Apparently your other three friends didn’t know either, eyebrows furrowing when they heard the news. It was already dangerous to be out late at night since that’s when they prowl on a full moon, but to also attend a Djinn club is just asking to be somebody’s meal. You smacked her shoulder and asked, “Why did you bring us here knowing that it’s feeding night?”

“They’re hot!” She responds, “If they’re gonna be active tonight then I know I can score at least one in exchange for my blood!” The creatures are known to be attractive, adding to the hype of the tattooed beings. Unfortunately, your friend is so boy crazy that she’ll put everyone at risk just for a chance with a murderous creature.

You all escaped and ran as fast as you could when all hell broke loose, ending in this dark dusty library, choosing your spots to hide in. You knew you couldn’t stay in the same spot for long. You knew you were going to have to move before they stopped feeding. The blood curdling screams of your friends begin to quiet down as you look over to the original friend who put you all in this predicament. She sat at the aisle across from you, eyes wide as well as her own hand covering her mouth as her body trembled. You both eyed each other in terror before you motioned for the door opposite of the sound. It was a few aisles down. You both have the potential to make it as they continue to eat.

You nod at her before standing on your feet, crouching as you peeked behind your aisle, instantly regretting it as you turned back away from the gruesome scene. Holding your stomach you ease your way to the other side of the aisle in front of you, hands trembling as you hold your breath once pausing, listening for any movement towards you. When all you heard was the usual ripping and bone cracking you turned to look at your friend who's following behind on her own side. You both move again and again until you finally make it out of the door, sprinting down the hall until you make it outside.

Your original plan was to keep running until you didn’t hear your friend behind you, turning around you noticed her standing in place, staring to the side.

“F/n! F/n! Come on!” You call out to her, confused as to why she stopped.

“But he’s so pretty.” She says breathlessly, her eyes beginning to glow purple.

You follow her sight, startled when you notice the shirtless man with a large tattoo on the left side of his torso, as well as a symbol on his neck. His purple mullet flowing in the wind as he stands across from her, eyes and tattoos glowing purple. Blood stained his mouth as well as his chest, his hands dripping with the substance as he licked some of the liquid off his fingers. You turn away as you grab her face, turning her to face you.

“Wake up! Wake up now! We’re gonna be killed!” You shake her face as her mouth hangs open, slobber dripping as you shift your gaze back to the male who stood still. You know you should leave her, but you can’t. You know it’s her fault, as well as yours for even being out in the first place on a night like this. Tears fall down your eyes as you contemplate whether or not to leave her to die. The only way she can be pulled out of the trance is by the Djinn releasing her or death.

You could be a savior and offer yourself up, but fear overtook your senses. You couldn’t possibly save her, so you decide to make a run for it while you still can, releasing her face. Before you could run, claws wrap around your wrist, yanking you back as you fall on the grass, bottom making contact with the ground as another tattooed being crouches over you. You noticed the yellow glow against the tiger symbol on his neck as well as the symbol that matches with the purple eyed Djinn on the right side of his chest.

His smile was as cold as his golden gaze, eyes refrained from glowing as he stared down at your fearful face. Blood covered his torso as well as his hands. You could see that his teeth were also stained with red as his smile widened.

“Where do ya think you’re going?”

You could only stare back at his face before you looked over to your friend, your hand reaching out in reflex as you called out to her when she walked over to the male. A hand on your chin forces you to turn your attention back to the brunette with blonde strands hanging over his face.

“Hey! Pay attention to me. I asked you a question.” He eyes you with an irritated gaze, causing you to yelp when he squeezes your chin tightly, claws poking your skin.

“Playing with your food, Kazu?” Another shirtless man walks toward the two of you from inside the building, fresh blood covering his mouth as well as his whole torso while the large tattoo on the right side of his body as well as the one on his neck glows purple.

He stops next to you both, sniffing the air as he eyes you and your friend with a lazy smile.

“Are you radiating that sweet scent, darling?”

“N-no! I don’t know what you’re talking about!” You say as you pull back from the man’s grip.

The purple eyed man’s fingers met his chin. “Hm. Of course you don’t. You smell it?” He faces the crouching man.

“Yeah. That’s what brought me over here. Never smelled blood like that before.” The tiger symboled man pushes himself from the ground, standing over you as their intense gazes study you like you’re a new specimen.

Your eyebrows furrow as you notice their eyes becoming dim, faces turning red as they hold dazed looks on their faces.

“Man, your smell is intoxicating.” Kazutora breathes out, chest rising as he drags a large sniff of the air.

“Maybe we should preserve this one, yeah?” The short haired man suggests.

“You think boss’ll allow it?” Kazutora questions.

“Allow what?” A pink haired man entered the scene, walking until he reached the two men standing above you. His hair covered in blood as well as his face, hands, and chest, as if he rubbed himself against the liquid while feeding. You eye the blue glow of his wrist, the symbol matching the iciness of his piercing eyes. He sniffed the air, facing you as he observed your figure. Bending over, he grabs your arm, pulling you up on your feet and smelling the limb.

His face instantly warms, eyes dazed as he continues to sniff the sweet aroma, using a hand at the back of your neck to pull you closer as he nuzzles your neck. You put your hands on his chest as you pushed yourself away, his hand preventing you from moving as you struggled in his grasp.

“What is that?” He pulls back, turning to the others as he releases your neck only to keep a hold of your arm.

Kazutora shrugged. “That’s what we’re trying to figure out.”

You hear the sound of flesh ripping along with a familiar scream of pain. Turning your head, you eye the gruesome sight. The man has your friend’s detached arm in his hand. A big gash is left where her arm used to be as her legs tremble, her eyes staying wide as they continue to glow purple. Blood drips from the wound as he bites into the flesh of the arm, more blood staining his mouth as he moans while satisfying his hunger.

Your hands shake as you eye the display in horror, tears streaming down your face as you watch your last friend become a beast’s meal. Instincts going haywire, you wanted to run away, but if you did, you knew you’d be easily captured by the Djinn considering their abilities. They have the upper hand against the human species. You’ve always wondered why they didn’t just take over. You could only stand there amongst the men, feeling helpless, weak, and vulnerable. It disgusted you to be so human in this predicament. You were going to die and you had no choice but to accept it.

“Awe, she’s crying. I think you’re hurting her arm, Sanzu.” Kazutora jokes, pointing at your tears. You ignored him as you turned your head away from your friend who’s shoulder just got bitten off, using both of your hands to cover your ears, the sound driving you crazy.

Sanzu releases you just in time for you to lean over and vomit. Bile burning your throat as you gag and dry heave.

“Disgusting.” Sanzu hissed as he walked towards the purple mullet. Kazutora leaned over with his hands on his knees.

“It’s amazing how you still smell sweet. There’s no way boss won’t take you home with us.” He beams.

“He does have a thing for sweet things.” Ran states with a cigar in his mouth, sparking it before shoving the lighter in his pants pocket.

A short man walks out of the building, the men immediately turning their attention to him. The atmosphere darkens almost as much as the voids you’d call his eyes. He gave you an icy glare, causing a rapid chill to run up your spine as well as sending alerts to your instincts. Your body tenses as he comes closer. You hear him sniffing, eyeing the blood on his mouth as well as on his chest, bloody claws by his sides. He stops in front of you, gazing into your soul as you shift in discomfort.

His gaze slightly softens as the familiar red hue forms on his face, panting softly as he drags more of your fumes through his nostrils. You eye the blood staining his platinum hair, the stench of flesh and blood surrounding you. His palm rests on the side of your neck for a moment before he uses a claw to nick the skin, slicing a small cut in between your neck and shoulder causing you to flinch. He leans in, warm breath grazing your neck before his tongue slithers against your wound. His sunken eyes widen as his hands grab your shoulders, pulling you in as you place your hands on his chest in an attempt to push him away before you yelp from the fangs piercing through your skin.

He gulps your blood down, moaning against you as you fall backwards. He lands on top of you, a hand sliding behind your neck while the other balances next to your head. Your hands grip his shoulders as your eyes shut tightly in pain. You hiss and whimper under him as the others, including Sanzu and Rin, watch as if they’re in their own trance. He finally pulls his teeth out of your neck before he grips the back of your neck tightly as he nuzzles against the wound. Your blood rubs along his face as he engulfs himself. He breathes your scent in deeply before pulling back.

He pants as he sits on top of you with intense eyes. You avoid eye contact by looking at your own blood covering the hand that felt the moisture from your neck. Your hand trembles as you look at the men who stood around you. He stands up and walks away from you. He flicks his head, motioning for them to grab you. When you see this, your fight or flight kicks in causing you to hop up and run. The only place you could go was the forest but if you stayed hidden there until the sun rose, they would have to let you go in order to not break the treaty.

“So she wants a chase?” Rin questions with a smirk as all the executives stand and watch you run.

“Bind her and bring her to the car when you’re done.” Mikey says before he hops into the car.

With a wide grin that shows their sharp stained teeth, the four men began to sprint after you, Ran dropping the cigar in the process.

You run as fast as you can, grunting and breathing hard as your heart pounds. Your chest tightens as the pain in your legs form fast from running at a speed you’ve never had to run. You hop off of mini hills as well as passing many trees. The only light allowing you to see in the moonlight shining through the leaves. You just had to find a hiding spot to survive the night. You wouldn’t have run into the forest if they weren’t blocking your way. You knew you couldn’t pass them.

You groan as the pain becomes almost unbearable, the tightening of your body making it harder to breathe. You knew you’d have to stop soon but your adrenaline is pumping and you refuse to let them catch you. At least not easily. You thank the heavens that you hadn’t worn heels, the platforms of your shoes smacking against the grassy terrain, attempting to not fall on loose twigs or branches. As you run, you also gaze around for any mud to prevent yourself from sliding on it.

You pant, mouth wide open as you peek behind you. Seeing nothing there you continue to run as you look for the perfect hiding place. If you were being honest with yourself, there’s a low chance of surviving without being caught. They probably know exactly where you are and just allow you to run because they like to play with their prey. You’re not dumb. You were just scared. You had to try. Before you could plant your feet into the ground, you run into a figure in front of you, slamming into them.

Your friend's blood stains your clothes, mixing in with your own as the man wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you in as he leans over to smell your blood.

“I don’t think we’ve properly met.” A hand covers your mouth, blocking your scream. You’re forced to turn the other way, your back against his chest as he holds you in place. The other men stood in front of you in a curve, staring you down with glowing eyes.

“I don’t think I want to put her in a trance. I like it when they fight.”

“I want a taste. Mikey made you look so good.”

Suddenly, fingers connect with your chin, moving your head to the side as the person in front of you sniffs before leaning into the spot Mikey focused on.

A long tongue glides against your neck, the short haired man moaning softly before his teeth sinks in. You yelp in pain as another bite comes from behind, the man’s younger brother getting his own taste from the other side of your neck. The arm around your waist tightens you in place. You smack Ran’s shoulder as you try to push him away, tears rolling out of your eyes at the pain.

“You guys are hogging her all to yourself.” Kazutora states before snatching one of your arms. He bites into your forearm, eyes widening when the blood hits his taste buds, eagerly draining you. Sanzu does the same to the other arm, shutting his eyes as he drinks from you. You could only cry out in agony as they drain from you. Your body weakens as well as you becoming light headed. This goes on until you begin to see stars, your vision blurring. They pull away from you just in time before you faint, your body weak against the man behind you as you lean back.

Suddenly, your bottom met the ground as the man sitswith his back leaned against the tree. You begin to feel kisses littering all over your neck, lips hitting the blood that continues to ooze out.

“You taste so fucking good.” He whispers as he licks the liquid. Your eyelids are heavy as you sit barely awake. It feels like your black out drunk, going in and out of consciousness from whatever was spiked in it.

You look into the eyes in front of you, the person kneeling before you as two palms hold your cheeks, lips meeting yours as you’re forced to kiss the man. You couldn’t even flinch when he nipped your lip, blood drawing from you as you sat weakly.

“Let me go.” You whisper against his lips, not having enough strength to say much in a louder tone. He pulls back as he smirks.

“Go where? You can’t even walk.” Sanzu says as he crouches beside you, eyeing the wound on your neck and using his fingers to force you to turn towards him.

The red hue is still stuck on all of their faces, dazed eyes as if they’re intoxicated by your scent.

“I wonder what your thighs taste like.” The golden eyed man states before kneeling and pulling your leg open. He leans over and begins licking and sucking your thigh before sinking his teeth in. Another grunt leaves out of your mouth from the pain.

“I wonder how you taste down here.” A hand coming from behind slips into your pants as you try to wiggle out of his grip.

“Stop! Don’t touch me!” You cry out angrily. The hand dips into your panties, slowly rubbing up your slit before landing on your clit.

“I bet your cum is as sweet as your blood, huh?” The man behind you chuckles as he rolls his finger against your clit.

“I think we should find out.” His brother adds on, smiling as they nod at each other. Kazutora moves away from your thigh as he wipes his mouth, licking the blood he wiped from the back of his hand.

Rin pulls his hand out of your pants before reaching under your thighs and pulling them as far back as he could. Ran uses a claw to cut a slit from the zipper of your pants down to your ass. He tears a hole into the pants, stretching them to get a good view of your panties.

“No! Stop right now! Please!” Your head falls back on Rin’s shoulder weakly as you use your hands to cover yourself. Sanzu grabs them, securing your wrists above your head.

Ran leans over as he slices through the middle of your panties. He closes in and takes a big whiff of your vagina. Using two fingers, he gently spreads your lips apart with one hand while the thumb on his other hand pulls the hood of your clit back, revealing the bud.

“What a pretty pussy.” You twitch slightly as you feel a blow of air on your clit.

Your face warms up when you feel his lips grazing your clit, leaving a soft kiss on the bud. He does it once more and then again as he looks at you with intense eyes. You bite your lip, sucking your teeth as you turn away, only for Sanzu to use one hand to force you to look up at him. Leaning over with one hand still gripping your wrists, his lips meet yours. Rin keeps your legs pulled back, piercing his claws into your skin to draw some blood, watching as you flinch in pain, all the while Ran licks up your clit before he gives a few more kitten licks. Finally, he closes his mouth around the bud, sucking and flicking his tongue as he dives in.

Kazutora, who's still kneeling on the ground, licks up the blood dripping from your thighs. You whimper against Sanzu’s mouth.

“I think we should put the bind in between her breasts.” Rin says as you jolt from Ran’s tongue. Sanzu pulls back.

“We should put it on her face, that way everyone knows who she belongs to.”

Kazutora pulls back. “But she has such a pretty face, I don’t want to mark it.”

Ran continues to suck your clit as he lowers his head to lick some of your slick from the hole itself, his long tongue pushing inside as he uses a finger to rub your clit. He doesn’t pay much attention to the conversation, too obsessed with drinking your juices as your pussy contracts. Your head falls back with your eyes shut tight.

“Fine. Take her arms.” Kazutora grabs your arms as he stands up, Sanzu kneeling to tear the middle of your top open, revealing the lack of bra.

“Wow, you were already ready.” Kazu beams.

Sanzu sticks out a claw as his eyes glow, along with his tattoo. The beam reaches his hand as the claw meets with your skin, Rin holding you tighter as you scream in pain. The claw penetrates your skin as it drags into the shape of their Bonten symbol, blood dripping down as you struggle in his grip.

“Stop! Stop! It fucking hurts!” You cry out, your own nails digging into the skin of your palms. Kazutora forces you to turn to him with one hand, trapping your screams with an open mouthed kiss.

The contrast of pain between your chest and pleasure from your pussy shamefully causes you to near your orgasm as Ran tongue fucks you and rolls a finger around your bud. Your pussy drips with juice as your body convulses, just in time for the bind to complete as it glows a blue color that swirls into all of their signature colors before it resembles a normal tattoo. You yell out as you finally reach your limit, creaming on his face as he laps up the juice. Not long after, you finally pass out from all the overwhelming sensations.

148 notes · View notes