#I'll probably give up after like five episodes but whatever

[iamumbra195]

not a thought behind those eyes

And then the insanity

I love pre timeskip Luffy

[kleftiko]

do you know this cut dating show where they put two people in a box for 12 hours for a blind date? would you be able to write a drabble about hawks x reader in this setting, i just thought it was cute 😩

❦ 12 HOUR DATE

cw: none, this is fluff

okay so i watched an episode and the only thing i can think of is the box being so god damn small 😭 his wings too big for this got dang box

intro—

"hi, im y/n." you nod your head to the camera, knees tucked up to your chest.

"and i’m hawks," he throws up a casual wave and smile, body mimicking your pose so as not to get into each other’s personal space.

not like that was really an option, what with how small the box is. the first thing hawks does is shake your hand, warm and rough palms clasping yours, before the both of you return to your own corners.

"are we ready?" the producer calls, and you two give a simple nod. "any questions?"

"are my feathers allowed to leave the box?" hawks (thankfully) asks, the red wings brushing against you involuntarily.

"uh, yeah, sure, they can do whatever," is the answer. "alright, three, two, one..."

 

hour 1–

"i don’t have any siblings." he answers your question. "id like to think i was the best outcome, though."

you breathe out a laugh. "what’s it like being a hero?"

he makes a face, and you can’t help but genuinely giggle.

"that’s too deep a question," he smiles. "next!"

 

hour 3–

"i wanna—just—like starfish." you say.

"starfish?"

you nod, bent arms lifting to the sides as you attempt to raise a leg, "starfish. it’s so cramped, i need to stretch."

it seems he understands what you’re saying. hawks grabs his jacket and shuffles to the back wall of the box.

"here," he goes, "you take this side, i'll take here; we can stretch out a bit."

it’s not much, but the stretch of your legs as the two of you face each other is a bit relieving. you can even slide your back onto the ground, your legs bending to accommodate. you both attempt to get comfortable, back against the floor and eyes to the ceiling.

"not really a starfish—more like an inchworm." he says this and wiggles his body. you can’t see it, but the foot that nudges you and the sounds he makes erupt a laugh from your throat.

 

hour 5–

you two are nearly shoulder-to-shoulder, legs stretched towards the camera. hawks’ fingers are picking at the fur lining of his jacket, your own coat stuffed to the side.

"what’s your… favourite kind of… kiss?"

you cock your head, taking note of the pink on his cheeks and his lack of eye contact.

"you mean like..." you couldn’t help wanting to tease him. "cookies and cream?"

he snorts loudly, throwing his jacket in your face out of embarrassment as you cackle and catch it.

"shut up! you know what i mean!" to be dramatic even further, he scoots to the other side of the box, ignoring your laughing.

"i don’t think i do," you admit. "how many kinds of kisses are there?"

"at least—like—two."

thinking about it, you don’t notice that you start folding his jacket; it's thick and warm, perfect for the cold wind he probably flies through every day.

"probably standard forehead kisses." you shrug and place his coat beside yours. "what about you?"

he bites the inside of his cheek slightly, not giving you an answer. after a beat, you raise your eyebrows.

"have you never been kissed before?"

 

hour 8–

"my name is keigo, by the way." he whispers.

there’s no need to speak loudly; the two of you are lying side by side, bent legs knocking into each other softly as your heads are using his jacket as a pillow.

"keigo…" you test on your tongue. "that’s nice; i like it."

he chuckles halfheartedly and says, "that’s good; i like your name."

"thanks, i got it for my birthday."

the two of you turn your heads to face each other, the proximity not really bugging either of you anymore. your gaze focuses softly on his eyes, admiring the colour and sleepiness in them from a lack of movement.

you hold up your hand, and he smiles before giving you a high-five.

 

hour 10–

now you’re on your stomachs, your coats used as pillows as you watch outside the box. his feathers are barely visible in the camera, but it can capture your focus as you follow them zoom all around the room. partials of a few bunching together reveal shapes, and keigo’s ramblings about straw houses allow anyone to understand he’s telling the story of the three pigs.

both your faces are filled with content and childlike wonder as you watch the story. arms shift into one another as you point somewhere.

 

hour 12–

heads are resting on each other’s shoulders, exhaustion apparent on both your faces, and your mouths are silent. all four hands are up as you see if either of you can lower just your pinky.

"my left just won't go down." he mumbles, and you let out a half-hearted ‘that’s what she said’.

he flicks your forehead, and you both laugh.

"it’s gonna be weird leaving here now." he admits. "all of a sudden, you won't be here."

"is this stockholm syndrome?" your hands rest on your lap.

he admits, "maybe."

 

outro—

"so, how was it?" the producer asks behind the camera.

keigo has his coat on and his wings spread as he gets to stand once again.

"definitely new," he says. "and weird."

"do you think you’ll see them again?"

he shakes his head with a grin. "hell no—never—they were so—"

"—you can get bubble tea by yourself then!" your voice sounds far away from the camera as keigo laughs.

"wait!" he calls as he disappears from the shot, his voice now drowning out as he chases after you offscreen. "i don’t know where the place we’re going to is!"

[maximoffcarter]

Cold.

Pairings: Casey Novak x reader.

Summary: Based on 9x19: Cold. The squad is involved in a mess made by Lake without any guidance of what really happened. Casey Novak had made sure to tell all of them that they would do it by the book; reader was willing to do anything as long as it was the right thing to do, but once she finds out her girlfriend is getting too carried away, she has to stop her.

A/n: This was requested by an anon, and lemme be honest with you here...I have rewatched SVU so many times, from season 2 to probably season 19 (mostly because I love rewatching from 2 to 9), but the truth is that I have seen this episode probably 2 times in my life, 3 if we count this time. The way I feel so frustrated that they decided to 'end' Casey's character this way, was so frustrating for me, I actually sobbed knowing Casey wouldn't be back the first time that I watched it. Of course, after that, Casey's farewell was not any better, and I'll forever be mad. So I thank the anon who asked for this request for giving me the chance to rewrite this and pretend as if Casey never actually left. There is some angst, some things I changed, but I do hope you guys enjoy this. Enjoy and leave your comments, reblogs, hearts, whatever you'd like, will be very much appreciated🫶🏻

*not my gif*

For the last five years that Casey Novak had been working in Sex Crimes, she learned that life was definitely not fair, and justice was not what they painted in Law School. She had tried her best to surpass the guilt whenever she lost a case, to move on and go on with the next case, she saw how the squad easily did it. Of course she knew it wasn’t easy, she knew that it also hurt them, and they probably carried it with them for a long time, maybe for their whole life. She had talked about many cases with them, some that they remembered from years ago, some that were never forgotten. She also learned that working with SVU, definitely changed her way of thinking; when she started working with them, she wanted to do everything by the book, because she had heard that sometimes the squad made things they were not supposed to do just to favor them, which of course part of her understood why they did what they did, but she needed to go by the book or the DA’s office would go for her head. She slowly grew up with them, which also meant that her work ethic changed entirely once she learned that sometimes, they didn’t have to go by the book; do it legally, but not exactly in order.

Casey learned that the squad always had each other’s back, and slowly, they started having hers, which made her believe that they had accepted her as part of their family. They had their ups and downs, Casey got on their nerves just as much as they got in hers, she learned to treat them, she learned to go at their same pace, she learned to be part of their squad, and truth to be told, she did not regret anything. Branch and Donnelly had warned her about how the squad worked, and that she had to look out for herself and not exactly them, but Cragen’s words always stuck with her; it was only them, they only had themselves, no one else, and she learned to embrace that. She learned so many things from them, things she’d always cherish, things that would always stay with her, things that still upset her but, they were her family, and she’d do anything for them.

Meeting y/n had been the best part of joining SVU, she was also a new recruit and both of them basically grew together in the job, bringing them together; what started as a friendship, became more as the time passed, and even if it was unexpected, they were more than happy to embrace it. They both learned from each other, and even if y/n was more on Casey’s side than the squads, sometimes y/n had her moments where she really needed to be on the squads side, just because she knew they tried their best. They supported their rights and wrongs, y/n joked that she’d always accept any wrong that Casey did, and she’d be by her side no matter what, and Casey believed the same, she had joked that she’d get y/n out of any possible problem, even if it meant getting herself in trouble; and y/n knew she meant that. Doing it for another person? Y/n would always protect her squad, always. Casey? She would, she loved them. But get as far as losing her job for them? Y/n didn’t think so. Right?

“Casey clearly said we cannot question him, Elliot. Are you really gonna go to the hospital and do exactly what she said we could not do?” Y/n asked as she followed Elliot and Olivia to their car.

“We need to know what we’re dealing with, y/l/n. We’re basically blind here, how are we supposed to help him if he’s not letting us?” Elliot turned to look at y/n as he opened the door of the car.

Y/n shrugged. “Elliot…” she sighed. “I know this is not looking good, we have no idea what really happened here. But we cannot just go and do what we’re not supposed to do. We need to stick to what Cragen and Casey said.”

“We’re just gonna check on him, y/n. Nothing more.” Olivia shrugged as she looked at y/n.

Y/n scoffed. “You don’t even believe that yourself, Liv.”

“If you wanna go by your girlfriend’s rules, we won’t blame you. But don’t try to stop us from doing our jobs.” Elliot said before he got in the car, followed by Olivia.

Y/n sighed as she watched them go. “You know them, and honestly, I don’t blame them.” Melinda said as she stood beside y/n.

Y/n turned her head to look at her. “I don’t like this at all. I know he has a reason for why he did this, but this is not looking any good. Right?”

Melinda sighed as she shook her head. “No, not at all.”

********************

“I take it that you knew Elliot and Olivia were going to the hospital to see Lake.” Casey looked up as y/n walked in her office, closing the door behind her.

Y/n sighed. “I promise that I tried to stop them. They’re stubborn.”

“Just like someone I know.” Casey grinned.

Y/n chuckled softly as she sat on a chair, sighing. “What are we gonna do, Case? Melinda ruled it a homicide.”

Casey shrugged. “Get as much evidence as we possibly can and hope for the best.” She looked at y/n with a serious look on her face. “We need to do this by the book, y/n. We cannot risk anything here.”

Y/n nodded. “I know.” She sighed as she stood up and walked to Casey, pushing her chair, and sitting on her lap, wrapping her arms around her neck. “Everything will be okay, and whatever you need, I’ll be here.”

Casey smiled as she wrapped her arms around y/n’s waist. “I know you will. You’re the only one who listens to me.”

“And they hate me for that.” Y/n chuckled softly.

“You’re just being a good girl.” Casey grinned as she leaned in to kiss her lips softly.

“I am.” Y/n said against her lips, kissing her again but the kiss was interrupted by her cellphone, groaning softly as she pulled it out. “Y/l/n.” She frowned and pulled away from Casey. “I’m on my way.” She hung up the call and looked at Casey. “He’s not at the hospital.”

Casey sighed. “Damnit, Lake.”

“I gotta go, I’ll call you if anything comes up.” Y/n kissed her lips one more time before standing up.

“Please do and be safe!” Casey sighed as she saw her girlfriend go. This was definitely going the wrong path.

********************

“I know what you want me to say, but the science doesn’t support it.” Melinda said as she stared back at Casey.

Casey stared back at Melinda, taking a deep breath. “When the defence gets these lab reports, they might have enough for reasonable doubt.” She stopped for a moment as she stared at Melinda. “Can you live with that?”

Melinda shook her head. “If I have to. Because I sure as hell won’t risk my reputation for a verdict we didn’t earn.”

Casey stared at Melinda for longer than she wanted to, she could tell the stare she was giving her as Melinda took a step back and her face relaxed; Casey was definitely upset, and she didn’t mean to be upset at what she was saying, but none of this was gonna help them win the case. She only thanked Melinda and left the office, walking as fast as she could to get out of the building and get some fresh air. She was frustrated that this was happening, the last thing she had expected was to have to deal with something like this with one of the detectives. She knew they could do dumb stuff, she had to get them out of trouble before, but something like this? Never in a million years did she expect that something like this would happen and that she’d have to solve it. Not only that, but actually thinking about risking her career for it. She decided to go back home as she thought going back to the office was no use, she’d only be frustrated to be there and she didn’t need any interruptions from the squad, so she took all the files home. She was making some notes when she heard the door closing.

“Hi baby.” Casey said softly as y/n walked to the living room, looking up to offer a smile but the look on her girlfriend’s face told her that something had happened. “What’s wrong?” Her smile fainted then, scared that something else had happened.

“Tell me why Melinda called me and told me to make sure you were not about to do something stupid.” Y/n crossed her arms as she stared at Casey, standing right in front of her.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Casey simply said.

“Don’t lie to me, Casey. I thought you said we had to do this by the book. You were the first one to say that we could not question Lake, and to have you updated on everything. And now Melinda tells me that you want to risk your job?” Y/n shook her head. “Please tell me she’s just tired and she read the room wrong.”

Casey sighed as she put aside her notepad, looking up at y/n. “If the defense gets this, they’ll have enough proof to let him walk free, and then we’re screwed. We won’t even have a chance to save Lake from this.”

“Casey, I hate to say it and be harsh about it, but he got himself into this fucking mess, he didn’t want our help until he saw he was really drowning. You need to do what you can, and that’s it.”

“If I can do more, trust me, I will, y/n. There’s still a chance.”

“A chance?! And what do you have to do to get this chance, Casey? Hide the evidence? Stop Melinda from testifying?”

“She’ll say what she told me and describe it as best as she can.”

Y/n stared at Casey and shook her head. “Please tell me the evidence was sent.” She stared at Casey with concern on her face. Casey looked down at her hands and sighed. “Fuck Casey…” y/n ran her hands through her hair, starting to pace around the room. “You said we’d go by the book!”

“If we let them have it, we won’t win this case!” Casey stood up from the couch then, feeling frustration wash over her body.

Y/n turned to look back at Casey. “And you think they won’t find out?! It’s Donna for fuck sakes, Casey! It’s fucking Petrovsky! You want to get in trouble?!”

“I’ll say the reports are not complete yet! I’ll send them, just not yet, not by tomorrow.”

Y/n scoffed. “What the hell is wrong with you, Casey?! You could lose your job for this!”

“Wouldn’t you do the same?! He’s part of your squad! Other times, I see you guys doing the impossible to be able to get the minimum of evidence, and now you guys are stopping yourselves and doing nothing!”

“Because you told us not to! For once, we’re listening, Casey! And you’re the one screwing around! If you do this, you’re risking your license, and you know it!” Y/n shook her head. “And don’t give me that crap that if this isn’t justice, you don’t wanna do this anymore, because we both know you wouldn’t want to lose your career over something like this.”

“I’m doing what I’m supposed to do. He needs to go to jail.” Casey walked to y/n, trying to stop her from pacing around the living room.

Y/n scoffed, standing right in front of her. “Are you doing this for justice or for Lake?” She raised her brows.

Casey frowned and shook her head. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re gonna tell me that Lake didn’t want to go on a date with you before he found out you and I were dating. Oh, because I remind you that you didn’t say shit about it, and you just played along. Yeah, Fin told me about it.”

Casey scoffed. “Are you doing this because you’re jealous of him? Nothing happened and that was nothing, and you know that! This is not about him.”

“You said it, we’re not doing anything for him. You’re so worried for him, you’re willing to cover up for him and risk your job.”

“I’d do the same and more for you.”

“It’s not me who fucked up.” Y/n snapped, her eyes never leaving Casey’s. “I’m right here, doing exactly what you asked me to do. And I expect you to do the same, Casey.”

“Or what?” Casey snapped.

Y/n shook her head. “I seriously cannot believe you. You’re truly unbelievable. I am not gonna let you do this.” She walked out of the living room, not wanting to look at Casey anymore.

“Where are you going?!” Casey followed her, trying to ignore the range she felt.

“Ask Lake, since you’re teaming up with him now.” Y/n snapped before she walked out of the apartment and slammed the door closed.

Y/n would be lying if she said she didn’t feel a little jealous at the thought of Casey worrying too much about this case. She knew that Casey was mainly doing this to put that bastard behind bars, she was right, he deserved to go to jail, and he was the only person she could prosecute. If they didn’t win this, Lake would be in more trouble. And it’s not that she didn’t care about him, she did, but he had decided to drown himself until it was too late to ask for help. There was still a slight chance, but even then, there was nothing else they could do to help him. Y/n was angry that Casey was putting someone else before herself, she didn’t care it wasn’t for her, she knew Casey meant it when she said she’d do this and more for y/n, because y/n would do the same for Casey. But the thought of knowing that Casey was going to risk her career over this, made her angry and helpless. She didn’t know where she was going, it was still early, she could either go to the precinct to try to find anything else to help the case, or she could simply walk around to calm her anger. But before she could figure out where she was heading, she was walking inside a building and into the elevator. She kept fidgeting with the promise ring that Casey had given her, trying to control both her anxiety and her anger. As the doors opened, she walked through the hallway and for a moment stood by the door before knocking.

“Come on in.”

Y/n opened the door and took a deep breath. “Donnelly.”

Elizabeth looked at y/n and huffed a laugh. “C’mon, y/n. Drop the mannerisms. Anything I can help you with?”

Y/n sighed as she closed the door and smiled shyly. “I sure hope you can.”

Elizabeth stared at her for a moment before she took her glasses off, putting them on her desk and looking back at her. “What happened? Are you alright?”

“I am. This is about Casey.” Y/n said as she sat down.

“Is she okay? What happened?”

“She’s okay, for now. But I need you to take Casey off the Crane case.”

Elizabeth frowned. “Why would you want me to kick your girlfriend off this case? She’s your ADA. I don’t want to hear if you both had a fight over something stu-“

“She’s thinking about doing something stupid, Liz. And if I’m here, it’s not for you to tell on her, but to help me avoid it before it’s too late.” Y/n stared at her with a serious look.

“I need more than that, y/n.” Elizabeth raised her brow.

“She wants to hold the file that provides the evidence of the case, which is sort of more help to the defense than to us.” Y/n sighed as she shook her head. “I know she’ll hate me for telling you this, I…I might even lose her for this.” She huffed a chuckle. “But Liz…you need to take her off the case. I don’t want her losing her license and I know you don’t want this for her either. You can scold her, suspend her, whatever but please…don’t let her ruin her career. We both know this is not Casey.”

Elizabeth sighed as she shook her head. “Y/n…if she’s willing to do this-“

“She doesn’t know what she’s doing. I know me telling you this has the same risk if she does it anyway. But I want you to consider that I came here so you can stop it before this actually goes further. Please, Elizabeth. I know you don’t want Casey to ruin her career too. Please.” Y/n whispered softly as she felt tears in her eyes.

Elizabeth nodded as she sighed. “I’ll call Melinda and tell her to send me a copy, I’ll send the file myself and assign someone else to the case. I’ll call Casey to come to the office.”

Y/n tilted her head. “Will you report her?”

Elizabeth stared at her for a moment. She shook her head as she sighed. “No. But she will be punished for this. You too know that what she’s doing is not right.”

“And that’s why I came to you for help.”

“I know. I do wish you luck, though.” Elizabeth offered a faint smile.

Y/n sighed. “I think she already hates me. This will only be a bonus.”

Y/n talked to Elizabeth for a while until she decided she’d go back to the precinct to clear her mind for a bit, trying to talk to the rest of the squad, updating herself on where they were with the case. Two hours or so passed before Cragen broke the news that they had a new ADA for the case, and that whatever happened, they now had to inform her instead of Casey. Of course everyone stared at y/n, confused as to what was happening but y/n had no words, she had nothing to say about it, even if she wanted to tell them that it was her fault, that all of this would go to hell because of her, she just didn’t want them to find out yet, she had enough with arguing with Casey, and the last thing she needed was the squad yelling at her.

Eventually, she decided to go home, knowing that as much as she tried to keep herself busy, she couldn’t avoid Casey forever. She took her time to walk back home, missing one subway and then taking her time to walk back home. She took a deep breath once she was right in front of her door, getting her keys and opening the door slowly, noticing that most of the lights were off. She made sure to lock the door, and slowly walked through the apartment, until she noticed that the light for their bedroom was on, perfectly knowing that Casey was there. She took a deep breath before she walked inside the bedroom, finding Casey sitting at the edge of their bed, her arms crossed and her eyes staring at the floor. Y/n thought for a moment to go to the bathroom and give Casey a bit more time, but she was worried and scared of what had happened in Elizabeth’s office, so she decided to accept whatever was coming.

“Casey.” Y/n whispered softly.

“You went to Donnelly.” Casey simply said, her eyes still staring at the floor.

Y/n sighed softly. “I had to, Casey.”

“You didn’t have to do anything. I told you I’d deal with this.” Casey’s voice was low, she was not yelling, she was not going off on y/n -yet-, but y/n could definitely tell that she was filled with anger.

“I was not going to let you lose your job.”

“Even if it meant going to my boss and telling her what I was doing, knowing perfectly that the result could be the same.” Casey finally looked up at her, her eyes puffy and red.

Y/n’s heart sank as she stared at Casey. “Casey…I-I asked Elizabeth to not let you do this, so you didn’t lose your license. I didn’t-“

“She just suspended me. A month without payment.” Casey sighed. “And I’m off the case.”

Y/n almost sighed loudly in relief but knew that it could piss Casey even more. “I’m sorry, I-“

“No, you’re not.” Casey shook her head as she stood up, walking to y/n. “You’re not sorry. You decided to go to her to tell her what I was doing, and you thought you were doing this for me, but you were not. You didn’t want to deal with whatever happened next.”

“Casey, that’s not-“

“You were jealous that Lake was interested in me, that he tried everything to talk to me before he knew we were dating. You were not even thinking about putting that asshole behind bars, and now, he’s definitely not going to, he’ll walk free. And you know what, this won’t be on you, it’ll be on me.” Casey tried to hold back her tears as she stared at y/n the whole time, feeling both anger and frustration taking over her. “One way or another, there was the chance of me losing my license. If Elizabeth would’ve wanted to, I would’ve been called before the bar. Am I supposed to thank you?” She squinted her eyes.

“I did this for you, Casey. Even if it meant you hating me, I did this, so you didn’t lose your license and your job, because I know how much you love this job.”

“You’re right. I do love it more than I love you. I’d do anything for this job.” Casey snapped before she walked out of the room.

Y/n felt her body starting to shake as Casey’s words played over and over again in her mind. She knew Casey would be mad at her, but saying this to her? And the painful thing was that she actually believed that Casey meant it. Y/n sobbed as she sat on the edge of the bed, trying to hold back her tears but it was too late for that. Was Casey gonna leave her after this? What if Casey was right and she did this because she was clouded with jealousy? But no. All she wanted to do was prevent Casey from getting into a bigger problem. She wanted Casey to keep her job and her license, she knew it would be way worse if this was used again Casey in court, not only would Donna bring it up to the jury, but Petrovsky would make things worse, and then Elizabeth would’ve done something more than just suspending her. She did it for Casey. She was only looking out for her, and now Casey was mad. And y/n didn’t know if there would be a chance to fix this.

********************

Y/n had decided to stay at the precinct with the rest of the squad waiting to hear from the ADA how the trial was going. Y/n knew anyway what was going to happen already, and she felt guilty, not letting her squad know what had happened with Casey, what she had done, they were definitely going to blame her. And they had every right, Casey had a right to be mad too. She had not gone back to their apartment at night, getting a call from Elliot saying that Casey had stayed with him, and that they could talk back in the precinct, but she really didn’t want to talk about it. To anyone. Cragen finally came back with the news that the jury was back, and the bastard had walked free, there was nothing they could do, the ADA would try to do it again, but y/n knew that even if they did, there was not much of a chance for them to win. Everything was definitely going wrong, and this had been her fault. And she couldn’t even go to Casey because she was not talking to her, so she had to keep it all to herself. She decided to go lay down for a bit, tears rolling down her tears as soon as her head hit the pillow, quietly sobbing. She didn’t notice the door had opened and Olivia had walked in, she had noticed y/n’s attitude since they arrived early in the morning. She walked slowly to y/n and sat on the edge of the bed, her hand going to y/n’s back.

“Y/n…” Olivia whispered softly.

“I want to be alone.” Y/n cried out, drying her tears.

“Please. Talk to me.” Olivia said softly.

Y/n sat down on the bed, bringing her knees to her chest, and wrapping her arms, wanting to bury her face on them but looked up at Olivia. “I fucked up, Liv.”

Olivia tilted her head. “What do you mean?”

“They took Casey off the case because of me.” Y/n sobbed. “I went to Donnelly. Casey was going to keep the file, she was not going to let the defense have it. And I couldn’t let her do that.” She shook her head as she cried. “I couldn’t let her lose her job and her license. I know Donna and Petrovsky. She’s suspended for a month.”

Olivia sighed. “And she’s mad at you.”

“She said she loved the job more than she loved m-me.” Y/n sobbed as she let her head fall to her knees.

Olivia moved to sit beside y/n and wrapped her arms around y/n. “Y/n, sweetheart, you know that’s not true. I know she didn’t mean that.”

“After all these years…I never expected Casey to get mad at me. We both said we would do anything for each other, and now she’s mad at me for this. I only tried to protect her. I knew that her losing the job would hurt too much. I couldn’t bear the thought of her blaming herself for this.” Y/n huffed a chuckle. “And we lost the case. It was my fault.”

“There was no other way of doing this, y/n. And Casey knows it. She was blinded because she didn’t know what to do.” Olivia shrugged. “She also prevented us from doing something stupid. Because she knew we would try anything.”

“She thought I was jealous of Lake. And…she wasn’t entirely wrong. But I didn’t do any of this for him. I did this for her.” Y/n whispered softly as she looked at Olivia. “I’m gonna lose her, Liv.”

Olivia shook her head. “She knows this, y/n. She’s angry. She couldn’t do more, and we both know that’s hard for her. She would’ve done this and so much more for you, and we all know it.”

“I don’t think I’d have let her do this for me.”

Olivia smiled as she tilted her head. “We both know nothing would’ve stopped Casey.”

Y/n chuckled as she nodded. “Yeah.” She sniffled. “But now, I don’t think she wants to see me.”

“It’ll pass. Give it time.” Olivia smiled.

Elliot opened the door and stopped on his tracks for a moment, gaining the attention of both women. “Sorry, but uh…something happened.”

Y/n looked at Olivia for a moment and sighed heavily as they both stood up, following Elliot. Y/n wiped away her tears and tried to push back the pain she felt, she had shown weakness to Olivia, but she couldn’t show it to the others. Elliot didn’t say a word during the whole ride, but y/n knew something bad had happened with the way he was desperate to get to the place. And once there, she noticed the place full of cops and ambulances, feeling her heart sinking as they exited the car and walked to the scene, finding Crane’s body on the floor. She looked to her side and found cops cuffing Lake, he was avoiding their stares, a mix of anger and pride in his face. Y/n then looked to her other side to find Casey standing beside Fin, her heart sinking once again at the look on her face. They all watched how Lake was taken to the police car and that’s when he stared at them. Y/n understood why he did it, but she still wished he would’ve gone to them for help. They all stood there for a moment, not sure what they were supposed to do or if they were supposed to do anything at all. Y/n’s eyes landed on Casey again, noticing how Elliot was now dragging Casey out of the scene and telling her something, and for a slight moment, their eyes met, and y/n wanted nothing more than to run to her and hold her, but she knew she couldn’t. She turned back to look at Olivia, both staring at each other for  moment and then staring back at the scene.

********************

Y/n sighed as she closed the door behind her and dropped her keys on the small table beside the door, turning to lock the door and rested her head against it for a moment. She took a deep breath and made her way to her bedroom, debating if she was going to take a shower or she was just going to drop in bed and try to sleep. But as she looked up at the bedroom, she noticed the lights were on, frowning slightly as she walked inside, just to feel like she had deja vu as she saw Casey sitting at the edge of their bed. For a moment her eyes inspected the room, her heart beating fast as her eyes tried to find a suitcase and bags, but the room looked the same as she left it in the morning. Her eyes then went back to Casey’s who was already looking at her, she could see that her eyes were red and puffy just like the last time they had been in the same situation.

“Hi.” Casey whispered softly.

“Hey.” Y/n whispered back, not sure if she was supposed to walk to the bed or just stand where she was. “I uh…I didn’t expect you to be here.”

Casey nodded. “I know.” She nibbled on her lip as she looked down at her hands. “But I needed to talk to you.”

Y/n nodded softly. “Should I start or…”

“I’m sorry.” Casey sobbed, looking up at y/n, her eyes teary once again. “I…I didn’t mean to go off on you like that. I know why you did this, I know that you were only trying to protect me. And I was so mean to you.” She shook her head. “I shouldn’t have said a thing.”

“Casey…”

“I don’t know what I was thinking. I know what I was doing was wrong and I was still willing to do it. I had stressful cases, and I just didn’t want another bastard to walk free. But none of this was your fault and I took it out on you, when you just…you were trying to help, and I-“ Casey shook her head.

“I went behind your back, Casey.” Y/n said softly, feeling her own tears form in her eyes. “I should’ve stayed so we could’ve talked about it, and I could’ve helped you. But I was so blinded by anger, I didn’t know what else to do, and my best option was to go to Donnelly.” She shook her head as she took a shaky breath. “We could’ve gone together. I could’ve talked you through it, but I left.”

“You did what you thought was right. You saved me from getting censured and probably losing my license.”

“And I got you suspended for a month without pay. Donnelly must have gone off on you, and I just left you go through it alone.” Y/n sobbed as she looked down at her hands. “And I understand if you want this to end.”

Casey frowned. “What?”

“You said it. You…you love the job more than me. I went behind your back, I could’ve given you the same ending for going to Donnelly and I-“ she sobbed. “Casey, I’m sorry.” She brought her hands to her face as she sobbed.

Casey stood up and went to y/n, wrapping her arms around y/n, pulling her to the bed so they could sit down. Y/n wrapped her arms around Casey’s middle and buried her face on her neck, while Casey placed one of her hands on y/n’s head and kissed her head softly. “Baby, I am not leaving you. What I said…I didn’t mean it. I didn’t think about it. I was angry, I was stressed. And that’s not an excuse, but I truly didn’t mean it.”

“How could you not? I tried to help you and I could’ve done things worse anyway.” Y/n cried out.

Casey moved back enough to look down at y/n, placing her hand on y/n’s cheek to make her look up at her. “Y/n…the talk I had with Elizabeth would’ve been ten time worse if you wouldn’t have gone to her. Yes, she was upset at me…but I’m only suspended for a month. I could’ve been censured. And I didn’t because you stopped me from doing a big mistake.”

Y/n took a deep shaky breath as she looked at Casey. “You mean it?”           

“I do, my love. I shouldn’t have said that. Any of that. You were willing to help me and do everything to be here for me, and I pushed you away.” Casey smiled sadly. “I would’ve made a big mistake. But my biggest mistake was to push you away. I cannot lose you, y/n.” More tears rolled down her cheeks as she rested her forehead against y/n’s.

“I cannot lose you either, Casey. I can’t.” Y/n’s hand went to Casey’s cheek and smiled sadly. “We both let our anger take the best of us.” She huffed a chuckle.

“We did.” Casey grinned. “Let’s not let this happen again.”

Y/n nodded. “Ever.”

“Plus, we’re not allowed to breakup, remember?” Casey smirked. “You’re pretty much stuck with me. And now you’re stuck with me for a whole month.”

Y/n grinned as she chuckled. “I’ll ask for a month off so I deal with you.” She smirked. “If we’re mad…we take our time, but we don’t go to sleep mad. We talk about it.”

Casey nodded as she smiled. “Sounds like a deal to me. And you know I don’t normally take deals.”

“I’m the exception.” Y/n smiled.

“You are.” Casey smiled as she leaned down and kissed her lips softly, finally feeling some sort of relief as she had her lover back in her arms.

[the--rebel--fae]

Hey Fae! Do you know about the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse? If not, basically they are biblical concept for rooted evil in humanity and first four of seven seals for the “end of the evil world” or whatever (conquest, war, famine, and death).

Anyways, to my request! I wanted to ask to see if you’d write a paring of a FourHorseman!reader with Vox from Hazbin Hotel (and any other characters from that show if you’d like to lol)

Thank you and Gl with ur other requests!

A/N This is probably gonna happen each time I post a request since I feel horrible for making all of y'all wait. So! Big sorrys for taking so long with this but tysm for your patience! Now! On to the main a/n: Oh my friend, you have triggered an idea that is genius! Ooh this reminds me of that one episode from Charmed.--if you know which one, you totally rock. I had so much fun with this! I hope you like it too! 😊

Pairing: Vox x Strife! Four Horsemen! Reader

TW: Just swears, but that's about it.

Word Count: 814

His Little Chaos Bringer

The brick wall felt like a cool and relaxing solace as you leaned against it. Your pencil scratching furiously away in your notebook. Today had a been quite the productive day.

Though, you could have done without Blitzø's hissy fit for nearly missing the portal entry back to hell. He was complaining how you nearly cost him big time as he took you back into your main domain of the pride ring.

“You're lucky you're so damn powerful and make our jobs easier, you twerp.” He grumbled at you as he practically shoved you out of the I.M.P. van.

An amused chuckle made it passed your lips as you closed your notebook with a satisfying snap. You couldn't help that you were on a roll today with causing so many humans strife. You were the epitome of it after all being one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Your other three siblings were Lucifer knows where and you didn't really give a damn as long as they were keeping their stats up and making sure the plan stayed on track.

Your notebook was already bursting with your successes, an impressive list of names and ways you affect them filled its yellow time worn pages. And that was only today.

Looking around at stretch of land that was the V's part of Pentagram City you let out a tired sigh. You loved what you did, you really do. But after a long day of causing misery, all you wanted to do was collapse in a comfy chair and just relax as you listened to your boyfriend boast about his day.

The brief silence that filled the air in the little alleyway you were taking a break in was quickly broken by the sound of your ringtone: The Flight of the Valkyries–little on the nose but you were always a fan of the classics.

You glanced at the caller ID and grinned. “Well, ask and ye shall receive I guess.” Clicking answer, you couldn't keep the smile out of your voice. “It's like you just knew I needed to talk to you. Should I add telepathy to the list of your talents?”

A deep chuckle. “Well hello to you too Doll. Rough day I take it?”

You leaned your head back against the wall and felt the satisfying thump of cool brick against the back of your head. “Not hard, just very long. Apparently causing misery for a living can drain someone a lot.”

“Why don't you come back home to the tower and I'll see what I can do to help get some pep back in your step hmm?”

A smirk played at your lips. You definitely didn't miss the innuendo in that sentence. “Sounds perfect actually. I'll be there in five.”

A pleased hum could be heard on the other line. “Looking forward to it Doll. See you soon.”

“See you soon, Vox.” The call ended seconds after.

Pushing forward you felt your muscles stretch out in relief. A spark of excitement and contentment ran through you. Sometimes it paid to be the romantic partner of one of the strongest overlords and a tech genius like Vox. No matter how busy the two of you were, you were always able to make time for each other at the end of the day.

***

As the elevator door to Vox's penthouse suit swished open, a tired smile was brought to your lips at the sight before you. In front of the blue satin couch, on the table laid a beautiful–and frankly absolutely mouth watering dinner with two champagne flutes filled with wine.

“I take it you like the surprise?”

You let out a pleased hum and walk forward. "What do you think?" Wrapping your arms around Vox's neck, you lightly bumped your forehead against the top of his screen. An amused giggle passed your lips as you watch Vox's screen take on a light rosy hue around where his cheeks are supposed to be.

"Well, I'm glad you like it, my little chaos bringer." Vox gave you a soft peck on the lips. His kisses always left you with a tingling feeling--probably thanks to the fact that he is a literal tv, but you couldn't help but want more. Maybe at a later time, the night was still young after all.

"You know exactly how to make a gal feel special don't ya?"

Vox pulled away from your grasp and gave a wink. "Doll, you're special no matter what."

You couldn't help the snort that passed your lips. "Wow, cheesy much?"

Vox just waved you off. "What? I was just trying to be romantic!"

A fond smile pulls at your lips. You were probably one of the most powerful beings in Hell seeing who you were, but if this was the life you got to come back to everyday? It's all worth it.

A/N that was so much fun to write. I truly enjoyed this request! Feel free to request again! I hope you enjoyed it!

And if you guys want even more stories--like maybe your own personalized several-page long one-shots or even a multi-chap fic take a look at my Etsy Shop! I do commissions! I even have listings for Hazbin Hotel!

[fallenangelofsalt]

I realized I messed up the timeline in Purple Gold

This is what I get for not checking the dates first

Canonically, Purple had already been in Minecraft in 2018, and Gold died in 2020 according to the wiki. I'm not changing it though so now Gold gets to die(?) way earlier :)

(Not a lot of lore here, this is mostly just me straightening out the timeline and getting my thoughts in order since its easier for me to do that while writing and I might as well post it yk)

@styck-figure @whirld-of-color in case you guys are interested on the nitpicky stuff.

I thought about the accident being before the OG AvM but I think that would have been way too early, and it was mostly because then I could give Herobrine some fun implications, but in the end I think it fits better to place him in the time between OG and ep1, so I also get to play with how the updates affect Purple's world. I think that the experience of being inside of a game while it updates is a very underrated sort of horror when it comes to sentient videogame characters, and I'm looking foward to making Purple experience it :) though the fact they know its a game, and probably also how updates work, takes off some of the horror.

Purple's first appearance is in ep9 and I can't find any frames where the date is shown(the only full screens we get are in Purple's mac and it only says it's a wednesday), but in ep8 the date is 5/18/2018 and... none of the next episodes in season1 have a date. Or the first ep in s2. Ok, time to ask the wiki and they only have the airing date but whatever. 6/18/2018.

Anyways, that means the only updates that would have happened before he meets the others are Combat, Frostburn, Exploration and Color. That's kind of disappointing since I was looking foward to having Drowned play a major role in Purple's second death but I can make it work without it. Just needs some tweaking.

The Combat Update is overall just way too subtle to effectively work as horror, the main changes are just mechanics and added end stuff. Basically just not a lot of stuff Purple would notice or pay attention to, especially since the End isn't going to be somewhere they would visit right off the bat. At most they would notice some new enchantments.

The Frostburn Update is already a bit more interesting, it adds 3 mobs (polar bears, Strays and Husks), adds magma blocks, fossils, increases Magma Cube spawn rates and lets Enderman spawn in the Nether. Overall enough changes to be a bit jarring, but I'm honestly just not vibing with it.

Exploration adds the Woodland Mansion and all the fun stuff that comes with it, but its so rare that its sudden appearence isn't going to be all that shocking because Purple probably never went wherever it is before it showed up.

World of color adds some new blocks but none of them naturally generated. The most horror potential it has are the parrots. ...Actually, they have a lot of horror potential with their sound copying. I might use that.

I'll probably have to wait a while for any update-related horror.

So, the accident happens midway through the Combat Update, and maybe that's why it happens in the first place. Gold gets unlucky enough to be playing right when the update gets released, and since stickfigures interact with our programs differently, it makes sense their tech would too. Instead of waiting for the player to close the game before updating, it decides to update with Gold still inside. :)

Purple shows up a while after the Frostburn Update is done since it happens so soon after Combat and I want Gold to have some time to get used to his new existence and learn about players.

All the while, King is having a lot more roadblocks than he's supposed to have. I'll have to throw some stuff at him to justify how long it takes for him to reach his canon position, considering in canon it takes like 18 months AT MOST. It probably is somewhere closer to one year.

Here Gold dies in early 2016, so that means King needs to be five times slower than in canon. ...He's going to need a lot of roadblocks.

One of those roadblocks is pretty much just taking that video off the internet also mostly because how the frick did it even get there??? THEYRE IN THE FREAKING NETHER THEY MINED OUT OF THE SCREEN HOW IS ANYTHING RECORDING THEM RIGHT NOW????

[eisforeidolon]

Question: I wanted to bring this up, you've done it before, but it was years ago. You kind of flailed at the beginning 'cause now we're kind of at the better half of two decades but I wanted to see what you remember best from each season now that it's been a long time. See if you remember season one, two, three - so for each season, go for it.

[Unsurprisingly, this gets super long, so answers under a cut.]

Jared: Action!

Jensen: Well, if we flailed then, this is gonna -

Jared: Yeah, exactly!

Jensen: This is gonna be a train wreck.

Jared: [repeating from audience] A six hour panel.

Jensen: That's right. What we remember the most?

Question: Yeah, like the most memorable thing. I know last time you did it you mixed up, like, season four and five, you couldn't remember two at all -

Jared: We had a season two? Uhhh, I'll give an attempt. Season one was just literally the city of Vancouver. I remember just getting there, it was beautiful, it was July, I'd never been, we were shooting Wendigo, we had a -

Jensen: Do you mean like a life moment or a moment in the show?

Question: I was gonna say the show, but you know what, just gimme what you got.

Jensen: Yeah yeah yeah. Alright. Season one -

Jared: You want odds or evens?

Jensen: I'll do odds - unless I can't think of one. I remember having divers hold my feet and hold me under water with a young child in Dead in the Water and that was a very, very freaky feeling, being held under water. Especially when you're responsible for some other person's child.

Jared: [taps Jensen] I remember the hot tub - same day, I remember the hot tub they had set up off-camera because Buntzen Lake is super cold. And so we had to be in there so long they were afraid - it's possible you could get hypothermic or whatever? And so they had a hot tub set up, like if you were, like Jensen probably could see it from when he was under water so we'd have to go after we'd jumped in, we'd go in between takes, go to the hot tub area. Hot tub, that sounds - alright. You did number one so I'll do number two. Number two I remember getting - cutting my scalp off.

Jensen: Was that number, was that?

Jared: I dunno.

Jensen: You're just making stuff up now. No no no, that was the episode where Bobby backs his Chevelle into the house and we jump in and -

Jared: Was that number two, that's season two? Ah, that was season three!

Jensen: Ah, see! I think I got a two.

Jared: Okay. My favorite part of two, was season three, apparently! So.

Jensen: I got a two. When Dad came back and shot Yellow Eyes, that was the end of two, right?

Jared: Yes, yes.

Jensen: Boom. Okay, so I just told this story to my daughter actually the other day. When Dean gets thrown - when I get thrown against the tombstone and I pull the Colt out and then Dad grabs Yellow Eyes and I shoot him? So it was Fred Lehne's coverage and I dove into this tombstone that it was - we were shooting on stage, but the tombstone had been foamed so that I could really dive into it. So they had kind of a foam pad on the front of it? But it only covered the arching [?] portion of the tombstone, the base of it was still stone. And so I, you know [gets up to demonstrate], this was the tombstone [points at front of stage], I was here [takes several steps back], the cameras were here, so I was like they're gonna cut to this, I know they're gonna cut to me kind of flying into it [imitates leaping position], and then once I land [moves to lay against designated tombstone spot], then Fred walks up and the camera's right here [points over his shoulder from behind]. So I gained a little extra, because I was still young back then, and I dove, and I turned at the last second, and my ulnary nerve, which is also referred to as the funny bone, hit the corner of the stone.

Jared: Did you laugh? [Looks at Norton]

Jensen: From - and I mean, it was like a running jump, so it was - it was so much force. And I hit it, and my whole arm went numb and then felt like it was on fire. Like it was very traumatic, but I didn't yell cut because it was Fred's coverage. So I just very slowly rolled over and I was just like - my arm was just like vibrating [shakes arm]. And it was one of the most grueling pains I've ever experienced and to this date, this that this elbow is much more sensitive - like if I bump it, barely, it's like [pained inhale] OW - it's like hitting my funny bone all the time. And it was because of that. That was season two. [turns to Jared, pointing] Season three, he ripped his scalp off!

Jared: Scalp piece off! Season two I also broke my wrist.

Jensen: That's right.

Jared: Season three was the scalping.

Jensen: Season four? Do we have a season four?

Jared: I do!

Jensen: What happened? Oh, yeah he met his wife.

Jared: No no no no, not that at all! I'm just kidding, of course that's it.

Jensen: Ok! Yeah. Ruby was played by Genevieve Cortese, so boom, that's changed his life.

Jared: Season five is Swan Song.

Jensen: Season five Swan Song, I got beat up [puts hand over eye] and I had a thing on my eye -

Jared: Oh, yeah!

Jensen: and then the glue started to melt, just like yours did in -

Jared: Season two!

Jensen: season two. Oh, we're throwin' em down now!

Jared: Yeah, dropping em like it's hot.

Jensen: That was also assbutt -

Jared: Assbutt, yeah, that was five.

Jensen: and the bottle did not break.

Jared: That was amazing. Amazing. And remember [demonstrates throwing]

Jensen: You guys heard that story?

Jared: It's on the gag reel! Yeah, it's on the gag reel, they kept on throwing it -

Jensen: So, they didn't watch the gag reel!

Jared: Watch the gag reels!

Jensen: Anyway. Okay, that was season five, season six?

Jared: Soulless.

Jensen: Soulless Sam. Was that the pushup/pullup scene? [Jared fake preens] I mean, you gotta give it to your stunt double for that scene, that was pretty amazing.

Norton: [rimshot]

Jared: [flails comically]

Jensen: Thank you.

Jared: Season seven, uh, Dick. [Jensen deadpans] Roman! Dick Roman!

Jensen: Roman.

Jared: Turducken. That was the thing?

Jensen: Was that turducken? That was turducken, right? [fake horking sound]

Jared: Bobby died. [sounds of dismay from audience] See funny bone not so funny. [turns to Norton]

Jensen: Season eight?

Jared: Was great!

Jensen: Season nine -

Jared: Season eight was -

Jensen: was fine.

Norton: [rimshot]

Jensen: What was season eight?

Jared: The trials.

Audience: Sam's hair!

Jared: Season eight was, yeah, I had [gestures indicating long hair] -

Jensen: Oh, was that the shampoo commercial? Like the whole season was just a shampoo commercial. [rolls eyes] Wait, was that Samhain -

Jared: Maybe he's born with it, maybe it's season eight.

Jensen: Was that Samhain?

Jared: Samhain? No, that was season four.

Jensen: Right. [looks pointedly away] Um.

Jared: Right? [confirming with audience] Samhain was four. But [gestures to hair again, says ???] -

Jensen: We've established eight -

Jared: Yes, nine -

Jensen: Nine - oh, this is where it gets fuzzy. Like nine, ten, eleven, twelve [makes wavy hand motion] -

[Audience is shouting various things from here that they repeat and/or respond to]

Jared: Gadreel?

Jensen: What, was that Purgatory? Oh, Purgatory yeah. She's like - that was eight? [pointing] Oh, she says that was eight. Purgatory? Yeah, it was eight! [makes comically unsure face]

Jared: What happened in season nine?

Jensen: Somebody help us, what happened in season nine? This is embarrassing!

Jared: Tortilla?

Jensen: What's this? [slaps arm repeatedly] Oh! The Mark of Cain!

Jared: Gadreel! Gadreel! Mark of Cain and Tahmoh -

Jensen: Was that the fight with Cain in the barn?

Jared: That was the knife wound [points to knee].

Jensen: That was nine? I thought that was thirteen! [Jared laughs] Shit.

Jared: Okay, moving on -

Jensen: This is a disaster. [exaggeratedly angry] I told you this was gonna be a train wreck!

Jared: Ten. So here's something from ten I remember, it didn't happen on set -

Jensen: Wait! It was the the - the high school musical.

Jared: Yes...?

Jensen: That was the two hundredth episode.

Jared: Yes, which is what I - my biggest memory from ten, not on set, but in Vancouver -

Audience: Eye of the Tiger!!

Jared: [incredulous] Was that ten?

Jensen: [even more incredulous] That was, like, season ... two!?

Jared: Get with the program, that was like -

Jensen: When was that, what was that?

Audience: Four!

Jensen: That's what I said.

Jared: The two hundredth episode party.

Jensen: What?

Jared: The two hundredth episode party! At the Marriott or whatever -

Jensen: Yeah? What happened?

Jared: I dunno, that was season ten.

Jensen: It was the two hundredth episode party, Jared and I were probably drunk before it started. Eleven?

Jared: Killing Death. That was ten?

Audience: Amara!

Jensen: Tomorrow, what? Laura? Oh, Amara.

Jared: [imitates garbling of audience] Yeah, yeah, Amara.

Jensen: Amara, right, Big E Swalls.

Jared: Season twelve?

Audience: Mary!

Jared: Mary was in season one also!

Jensen: Twelve we got mom back, yeah, we got mom back. Oh, that was - was that the scene where I, was that the season where Dean has that confrontation with mom and basically says, says, 'You suck. I blame you.'?

Jared: Yeah, that was rough. Okay, we got - thirteen!

Jensen: That was a hard scene. Alright, great, that was, what was that -

Jared: Twelve.

Jensen: That was twelve. Thirteen! This is - we're just smashing this right now.

Jared: Jaaaaaaack. Al Cal.

Jensen: Jack? Oh, little nekkid boy, yeah.

Jared: Wasn't he in the last scene of the season, though? He was in his undies. Awww? He's a grown adult! I didn't say he was like, naked! He was wearing clothing.

Jensen: Poor Alex. Season fourteen?

Jared: Second to last one. [Jensen laughs] Penultimate, next! Fifteen, I don't remember it again. Um -

Jensen: Wait, fourteen, what happened in fourteen?

Audience: Michael!

Jensen: Michael.

Jared: Is that the air fight?

Jensen: Oh, right, that was the marionette fight. [exaggeratedly imitates a marionette on strings] This is me and Pellegrino's worst moment in our careers. Like just [imitates holding onto another person] holding each other, swinging, going, 'This is it. We'll never work again.' Bob Singer behind the monitor going, 'This is it, I'll never work again - they'll never work again!' [both crack up]

Jared: [gruff voice] 'This is it, they'll never work again.'

Jensen: Season fifteen, rusty rebar. There you go.

Jared: Oh, I love him! Guest star of the year!

Jensen: What? Of all the what? Just a little rusty rebar! That never hurt anybody. Well [holds up one finger] somebody.

Jared: Pie, I think pie in the face, I remember. The wig! [taps Jensen's arm] Yes, that was my I'll never work again! [both laughing]

Jensen: I remember I watched that episode and I was like, 'Ooof. What animal died that they put on his head?'

Jared: It was a Canadian raccoon. It's [???]. Um, yeah, alright, I guess that all wraps it up! Thank you.

Jensen: I need a nap.

Jared: Amen.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

A little while ago, I posted a screenshot to show I'd downloaded the first 22 episodes of four different long-running podcasts that I'm thinking of getting into. Thinking I'd try the first few episodes of each podcast and decide which one I want to commit to long-term for 2024. It's am important decision. My job is hard and my hours are long and the only consolation is I get to shut myself in an empty classroom during breaks, hopefully with some headphones where I can hear some people whom I'll enjoy enough to get me through the next few hours.

Well, I've made some progress:

I listened to the first five episodes of each podcast, down to 17 downloaded episodes instead of 22. I still haven't narrowed it down, really. Here are some bullet points with the first few things to come into my head about it:

- Three Bean Salad is by far the closest to getting cut, but not quite yet. It's the one I've enjoyed the least, but it's also growing on me more with each episode. I'm going to give it more time. I don't know what it is about that one that doesn't connect with me. On multiple occasions, some tangent they've gone on has left my cold, and I've tried to picture Andy Zaltzman and some other podcast comedian I like going on that same tangent, and have to admit I'd find it funny if those guys did it. Something about the TBS guys just doesn't get to me, even if they're saying funny stuff. Which means the issue may just be that I know less about these guys than I know about the people on those other podcasts, I don't get the inside jokes or their references quite as well, which is why I'm giving it more time.

- After five episodes, I have started to detect a very faint note of whatever Welsh bit is apparently in Benjamin Partridge's accent. I definitely wouldn't have noticed it was there if someone hadn't told me, which makes me think that maybe I'm imagining it, but whatever I'm hearing is allowing me to start occasionally thinking "I'm pretty sure the guy talking right now is Benjamin", and then another guy will address him as Benjamin, so I am starting to get that right. And I do know Mike Wozniak's voice, I'm starting to be slightly better at picking it out. They still sound mostly indistinguishable, I have no idea who's talking about 85% of the time, and of course that doesn't help with the enjoyment of the podcast overall. I'll keep listening to it at least until I learn to tell the voices apart. Which at this rate might be like 100 episodes.

- The other podcast where I struggle with differentiation isn't going much better. I can recognize Matthew Crosby's voice very easily, I just don't know whether it's Ben Clark or Tom Parry who's speaking. And if they have a male guest whom I don't know and who doesn't have a very distinctive voice, I probably won't be able to tell him from Ben or Tom either.

- Pappy's is a bit more uneven than some of the others, as it depends on the quality of guests. However, the more it goes along the more I'm appreciating the interactions among the three main guys, and most of the guests are good. I've been enjoying that one.

- I have to admit that after one episode, I was a bit disappointed by John and Elis. I like John Robins so much, from his stand-up. The guy he was in that first radio episode seemed a lot lighter than what I enjoy in his stand-up shows. Obviously, I don't want him to be talking about wanting to commit suicide while touring a friend's house every time I hear him talk (that is a reference to a specific part of his 2017 stand-up show, not just a general example of what I want comedians to do). But... I hate asking for this, but yes, I do appreciate a little edge, John.

Fortunately, after a couple of episodes, I think John relaxed into it a little, and I got used to what he was doing, and it got more fun. I will also admit that how Elis James is doing doesn't have a huge effect on how much I've been enjoying this show, it's John Robins that I like enough to want to hear hundreds of hours of him, and Elis James seems like a nice guy who makes a nice foil to the Darkness of Robins, and I'm glad he's there. But I'm there for John. Elis hasn't particularly changed my mind about that in five episodes, but his presence is nice enough, and he might have lots of time to change my mind. I recently described Elis James as being not only the least edgy comedian in his radio double act, not only the least edgy comedian in his marriage, but somehow the least edgy comedian in the sitcom where he starred with Josh Widdicombe. He’s eminently likeable, and I see that working, next to John Robins.

- I’ve found the John/Elis one a lot of fun, though, after I got a couple of episodes in. Some Howard/Richardson vibes, of two people who are close enough friends to be able to play off each other very comfortably, borderline too comfortably, but it’s fun to listen to. Oh, and little shades of the professional jealousy that marked the tension in the Howard/Richardson relationship have already popped up in this one, John Robins being bitter about Elis James getting cast in a sitcom and nominated for a Chortle Award (at one point he mentioned in almost the same sentence that his relationship was going well but his chances of winning a comedy award were going badly… I wanted to tell him that those two things will come to trade places, and the misfortune of one will cause fortune in the other). Previous experience has shown that two white guys talking to each other in a studio (or two studios) where one becomes more professionally successful and that creates a dynamic of tension is sort of my favourite thing (Howard/Richardson, old school Bugle), so this might be good.

- I fucking hate how funny I continue to find Peacock and Gamble (on the subject of two white guys talking to each other in a studio where one will notably surpass the other in professional success and relationship tension will ensue). I’m going to keep giving this one more time because I think that surely, if I listen to it for a while longer, it’ll get less funny. Two guys just being inappropriate and filthy has to get old after a while. I want to stop finding this as funny as I do. But I have to admit, I’ve found this one the easiest to listen to. It helps that it has the shortest episodes, but it’s the one where I’ve found myself getting to the end of each one and wondering how it could be over that fast, it feels like this episode only just started.

- The Pappy's really long song to introduce the quickfire round joke did, in fact, get slightly old in episode four. But it came back with a vengeance in episode five, funniest one yet. I'm now beginning to see how they could vary its content in ways that would keep it from wearing thin over 100 episodes.

- I still think Pappy's is at its least funny when it brings in audience members, as most podcasts are. But I have to admit that some of the Beef Brothers segments have still been funny. And there is a good argument for sticking with Pappy's, in that its the only one of the four options that brings in guests, so would keep it varied and I'd get to hear from lots of comedians I like, as well as maybe introducing me to new ones. But also, I do quite like spending hundreds of hours with the same two people until I've heard all their jokes and stories and can recite their lines along with them.

- There's a real possibility I end up sticking with John and Elis, which would of course mean doing their BBC show after XFM, and that will take the rest of my life. Oh well, there are worse things I could do with the rest of my life. Listen to every episode of Peacock and Gamble, for example. Because I could do that too. Too easily, probably. Like how I could eat an entire family-sized bag of chips, without even noticing the time passing, if I let myself. But that doesn't mean I should.

[wooglebear]

What's up with our friendly neighborhood janitor (aka Mr. Ree)?

in tetocu23, the changes made were less outright going from scratch as it was reorganizing a bit of his arc, plus giving him a girlfriend as a bonus.

Ree debuts in Erica's monster of the week episode (read this post by one of the AU creators for further details on that).

Ree used to be okay with Melvin. Then Melvinborg took over the school. Needless to say, he couldn't look at Melvin the same way ever again. It only worsened when the second half of the season rolled around.

I'll probably reorganise his plot a little to do this, but after that his plotline progresses like canon, with the big differences being Erica being his protege, Ree being a bit shy and getting a confidence boost after Vil Endenemys takes over the school.

Other than that, he's the same ol' badass janitor. He'd still have his first name, Toilette. He'd still have his brother, Lavatore.

And he has something else.

Meet Ms. Clarissa Mystery. She's the mysterious new history teacher at Jerome Hortiz. Not much is known about this lady. Her pupils both adore and fear her.

COOL AS ICE CLARISSA HAS BEEN ALL OVER THE WORLD, KNOWS ALL THE BEST BANDS, AND IS COMICALLY INDIFFERENT. She's dating Mr. Ree.

She became Ree's research partner after Lavatore quit.

She takes Dante as in her protege, and teaches him to be a detective!

Clarissa is very quiet, which… has been known to stifle her relationships, to put it lightly.

For example, the river of mid that are her interactions with Cash. whatever relationship that could have been budding between them has become strained.

Clarissa kinda hates Lavatore for quitting.

She’s not too happy about the situation with Melvinborg, to put it lightly.

While she and Ree have kissed sporadically (they did five kisses over the course of a six year period), Ree has stated that he has no intention of breaking up with Clarissa. Their kiss is actually very low in his priority list.

The tetocu23 version of the Splotch episode is basically just like canon tetocu… save for one change. Clarissa gets possessed by Splotch instead of Mr. Ree.

Understandably, Ree spends the entire episode mad. The episode goes mostly the same way as canon, but Hazel also tries to join the society of robes.

Friends with Alice and Bluebell (despite the drama teacher being evil).

(Tetocu23 belongs to @infini-tree and @cartchytuns)

[eshtaresht]

GUYS GUYS I CAN'T KSODKLSOSL!!!1!!1LKDKJ;;S !!!l1JK!::kKD;P SOSKSLSPSODS A;SDOKDLAD I CAN'T EVEN FORM WORDS

spoilers for ep 12 (and a bit for trigun in general) and my overexited ramblings under the cut

you know an episode will be good when where's no opening

so, the twins are meant to be characterized straightforward in every anime adaptation, ig. it's not bad, but the manga twists their personalities 180° and it adds SO MUCH nuance (I'll talk about this at length some day)

tbh I had to pause for laughter when knives was YEETED outta the gate (I have sense of humor of a five year old)

everybody already said everything, but still. OG HAIR COMEBACK OMG AHRAHAAKFJDlahjddjha!!!!!!!! ;!!! ;! and not only hair, but the whole characterization this episode was much closer to trimax vash, and not just sadboy depressive bbg

MERYL/REM PARALLELS LETS GOOOO!!! like, I guessed this would happen, but the visuals, the tension and pure GRATITUDE in vash's voice when he was able to break free from his mental prison... we're eating good

speaking of eating, I CAN'T get over that moment when vash deadass BIT KNIVES. that's peak sibling behavior, he's literally fighting tooth and nail over there

also mashwood is so real tonight!! love love love meryl&nico interactions in stampede, they barely spoke to each other in other versions! and the look of relief on vash's face when he sees nico skedaddling away with meryl!!! he's so glad that they're gonna be okay and that nico made the right choice and came back to help, if briefly. interstingly, he was able to remember everyone, but after the explosion at the end he still lost his memory.

and THE WINGS, DUDE!!!! it gives the finale of trimax, when they both had only one wing left..... still missing feathers, but I love the diversity with knives's, eh... knives, and vash's energy/void or whatever that is, I support it

he's so pathetic even when he looks cool, homeboy had NO control when he used his wing for the first time... cudos for learning new powers on the spot tho

ow ow ow that scene with the military hurt... and he couldn't even save them!

"why are you like that, vash?" "I'm vash the stampede" "IT'S BEEN OVER A CENTURY AND THIS IS THE BEST YOU COULD CAME UP WITH" same here, knives, he's hopeless. I anticipated that moment, but it probably hits even hard for stampede onlys

angel arm!!! tho it's not that angelic now... how are we gonna call it? I take suggestions. rip arm and coat, I feel like we'll actually get a more trimax leaning design next season!

to all the ppl (myself included) who wanted to see vash cry properly... are you happy? ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY??? after the last episode, after all the mental torture knives put him through, vash still doesn't want to hurt him and, just like knives, can't handle the distance between them.......... I am inconsolable. and as much as knives wanted to break vash, it hurts him so much to see those tears irl....... but he just can't stop, because they're both SO FUCKING STUBBORN and it already took to much to get there and he just can't. stop. now.

"nai is dead, you killed him" first of all, *sounds of screaming crying throwing up*. second of all, his name is million knives, vash, stop deadnaming your brother/j

the death scene itself.... oh it's soo good and yummy. I know this mf isn't fully dead and conrad will fix him, but still. he can have a second death of self as a treat

btw, gotta adress my earlier theory about "happy birthday" being metaphorical. no, it is in fact July 21st, and tristamp lasted about two months in universe. still pretty hard for me to believe, it felt five times shorter due to the pacing. but it is what it is: I'm esht and I was wrong, I'm singing the esht wrong song

and just as I thought this would be the end of it, WE GOT A FLASH FORWARD THAT HAD BASICALLY EVERYTHING WE WERE HOPING FOR AND MORE

RAISED BOUNTY! MERYL GIRLBOSSIFICATION!! a hint at insurance society (tho that was more of a threat and she's still a journalist). MILLY CONFIRMATION!!! ERIKS' LACK OF ARM AND AMNESIA!!!! EARTH FLEET AND CHRONICA!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

IT'S GONNA BE GOOD SEASON 2 IS GONNA BE EVEN BETTER I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONE MARROW

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 5

Episode 3: Thumb War Part 1

~Downtown Swellview, in backstreet alley~

Oh, (y/n) loved this job.  Some women got to jet all over the world and drink cocktails for a living, which genuinely happened to this one girl she knew in college - Melanie something or other. Yeah, good old Mel got to spend her evenings in Bora Bora watching the sunset, others got to relax in their penthouse suites after a gruelling day in court as a sleek, successful lawyer, whose biggest worry is what to order at the five-star restaurant they dine at every night. 

(y/n)'s nights were different. There was no sunset, the concrete jungle took care of that by hiding the horizon. She certainly wasn't being wined and dined with filet mignon and a Bordeaux, no, she and Ray didn't have that kind of money. What they did have was emergencies coming out of their ears because as usual, the criminals didn't come to Captain Man and co, they went to them.

That's how they'd ended up in one of the grottiest, grossest areas in all of Swellview--and believe me, Swellview had quite a few. It was dark, duh, because there could never be a crime on a nice, sunny day in one of the posh estates, and there was no one around--the perfect place for a nice robbery or murder. Yeah, their criminal had decided to make a shady backstreet carlot his digs, but whatever, they'd been in worse spots. 

And the guy wasn't even that big of a deal. Sure, he was a pain in the ass, but whatever criminal wasn't? Stainless Steve was hardly gonna go down as the world's greatest mastermind, rather the wackiest. His entire get-up made him look like an oven-ready turkey--all wrapped up in aluminium clothing. Steel shoes, steel-lined, foil clothing, dyed silver hair with added shiny highlights and gloves with iron knuckledusters under the metallic padding. 

He looked weird, really weird, but no matter how tough he thought he was, beating him up was a walk in the park for Captain Man and Miss Danger tag-teamed him, with the kid watching on the sidelines. A few punches from the hero here, a couple of kicks from the heroine there and Steve was getting tired. It wasn't glamorous by any means but god, she loved this job.

Ray grunted as he sucker-punched the metal man across his cheeks, making him collapse onto his knees as his face stung from the impact. Captain Man's strength was living up to its name, but the worse was yet to come. As he knelt, defeated on the ground but just gathering his energy to give the smirk hero a taste of his own medicine, (y/n) swooped in with a sharp kick to the chest, metal boot hitting metal jacket, and Steve stayed down. Probably a wise choice to stay there and wheeze as Ray grinned and pecked at his girl's lips for being so goddamn hot.

"You wanna tag in, kid?" The man asked his other sidekick as he pulled away from his blushing finacée so Henry could get some action. They'd been doing all the heavy lifting for the last ten minutes, wanting to do some couple fighting since they bounced off how hot the other was when throwing fists, but now, the kid looked like he was itching to do something useful. So, they elected to take a break as he was doing now, after all, a mid-battle kiss and cuddle wasn't so bad, was it?

"Yeah, yeah, yeah! You work on this sandwich, I'll work on Stainless Steve!" Henry garbled through a mouthful of PB and J. A mid-battle snack wasn't so bad either and Ray was endlessly hungry so he didn't mind splitting it with the kid, who was already springing to his feet at the opportunity of going to pound town on this clown.

"Deal. We'll munch, you punch." Ray grinned as they high-fived on the way past, Ray snatching the half-eaten sandwich as he guided (y/n) over to an oil drum. He could perch her on his knee and lavish his attention on her with kisses, sweet words and soft touches whilst his other sidekick burnt off some steam. And he got an evening morsel--win-win.

"I'd much rather work on you, Captain..." The woman teased her lover as Ray took a seat, causing his smirk to grow even wider. She too sat down, feeling emboldened under his dark gaze and how eating the sandwich was the last thing on his mind when he had an angel tempting him in ways that shouldn't have been possible. Perhaps he had to keep an eye on Henry too, but that didn't mean he could multitask. Kid, sandwich, hot future wife, he could do that.

"I'm gonna wreck you, Kid Danger," Steve growled as he slowly stood up, his chest and face still aching from the couple's assault, but he was less concerned about them. Sure, Captain Man and his girlfriend or whatever she was these days could take him but now it was just him versus a skinny, pathetic child. What could go wrong?

"Yeah, I don't think so, Steve. I have super-fast reflexes, so don't even try--" Henry chuckled with his boss at how cocky the villain was. He was the one with the superpower, he could move super-fast, no one else, Steve was fighting a losing battle, at least that's what they all thought. So, when the metal man backhanded the kid across the face before he could even finish his sentence, it came as quite a shock. Who was the cocky one now?

"Oh! Nice shot, Steve!" Ray exclaimed, shooting up from the oil drum so quickly that (y/n) nearly lost her balance. What gives? She was pulling out all of her best moves; fluttering eyelashes, big, doe eyes, innocent kisses to his cheek that then drifted to his jaw or lips, she wanted to seduce him and yet he was now preoccupied with how much Henry was sucking and that damn sandwich. Huh...rude.

"Don't compliment the criminal!" (y/n) snapped at her stupid doofus, who pouted when she took a speedy bite out of the PB and J to ruffle his feathers. Normally, the girl wasn't in the habit of sharing one snack between herself and two others but if she wasn't gonna get any kisses then she might as well do something else, and her sulking made Ray smile. He couldn't wait to take her home.

"Okay, you know what? That's it." Henry grumbled, having had enough toying with the guy, he just needed to let off some steam. No one punched Kid Danger, made him look like an idiot and got away to tell the tale. Looking over his shoulder, the teen whacked Stainless Steve repeatedly in the nose, his hands moving so fast that they became a red and blue blur. And Ray was loving it, his little movements and shimmies in time with every beat were so adorable as he watched his youngest sidekick beat the crap out of the guy, fists thumping against the metal but never tiring.

Henry gripped the criminal's jacket as his punches jackhammered the man's face, spreading pain throughout his nose until the guy couldn't take it anymore. His eyes rolled back and the kid knew he was done, so he relented to catch his breath and to watch Steve go floppy in unconsciousness.

"Careful, don't fall." He warned him breathlessly, even though he knew that the man was out for the count and couldn't hear him even if he wanted to, so it was no surprise when he fell back onto the ground with a scraping thud. "Aw, you forgot to be careful..." 

"Hey, nice job, K-D!" (y/n) grinned at the boy, strolling over to his side to share a fist bump with him since he'd pulled some pretty sick moves there. She never tired of seeing his lightning reflexes in action, just like he never tired of seeing all of her bruises disappear in under ten seconds. 

God, he wished he had that, his knuckles seriously needing icing, but that would have to wait until they got back to the Man Cave and he dreaded hearing Ray's complaints about how he wanted his fiancée all to himself after taking down one of the most irritating criminals in the city. Still, what needed to be done had to be done and his hands were sore.

"Thanks, Miss Danger," he grinned at the woman as his tender knuckles met her healed ones before he turned to Ray, who was still munching the sandwich, "okay, let's call the cops and have them come pick up this--yo! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Watch out! Wath out!"

"Holy shit, turn around, doofus!" But suddenly, there was no option for going back to the Man Cave. The hero stood there obliviously as his sidekicks watched in horror at how a Mini Cooper hurtled towards him in reverse. They had no time to react to how random it was, just that Ray was standing there eating like nothing was wrong because he was completely unaware that he was about to be flattened, and as usual, he thought their warning meant nothing. What a doofus.

"Watch out for what?" He asked in confusion but there was no urgency or worry in his voice and neither was he in a rush to do what they said. The danger was over, they'd caught the bad guy, kicked his ass and now, it was time for them to relax. All this hurrying wasn't his style, not when he had a half-decent sandwich in his hand and his eyes on the most beautiful woman in the world. Who'd want to turn their back on her?

"Just turn around, please!"

"Doofus, for the love of God, just turn around! Please, if you love me, turn around!" The boy and woman pleaded with him, wanting to avert disaster before it struck. Of course, it wasn't as if Ray would die or be seriously injured if he got hit, his indestructibility would protect him but that still didn't make it okay to just stand back and watch. He was their friend, boss, lover, and brother from another mother, whatever their connection, they cared about him and seeing him be run over by a tiny yet powerful British car made them cringe. If only he'd listen.

"Sweet girl, you know I can't take my eyes off you. I'm not losing the sight of you standing there, looking all pretty for you, the kid or anybody..." Oh, god. Should she melt or punch him for being a lovable idiot? 

"Move out of the way! We're not joking, dude!"

"I can't hear you, there's like a car coming or--" Too late. Oh well, at least Henry and (y/n) could say that they tried to save him, and it was Ray's fault that he was catapulted halfway across the parking lot when the Mini backed into him. To be fair, if it wasn't her beloved moron, the woman probably would've laughed at how comical it was to see a huge man fly through the air screaming, only to land on the concrete with a small squeak. However, when that squeak had such a familiar groan following it, all her heart could do was tense in worry.

"Oh my god!" She shrieked and ran after him, Henry quickly on her tail as tears sprung in her eyes, although they'd never fall. Now was not the time for sentiment, now was the time to make sure that he was okay--and he was. Captain Man is always okay if a little embarrassed.

"Dude, you all right?" Henry panted as they skidded to the spot where Ray had finally stopped rolling. He was moaning and groaning, perhaps a little delirious from the pain of a fall and blunt force trauma that would kill anyone else, but apart from that, he was still dumb old Ray.

"Yeah, I'm o...okay!" The hero groaned as the pain fizzled out and his vision cleared from the blurriness, bringing his friend and sweet girl back into focus. Aw, she did look all pretty tonight and the only thing that marred her exquisite features was the worry etched across her face from how he stumbled over his words. Well, he'd sooner put an end to that.

"Are you sure, doofus? How are you feeling?" (y/n) asked as she knelt to brush the back of her fingers across his forehead, which was slightly clammy and sticky from the fight and impact but she knew that that dopey look on his face wasn't due to a concussion, neither was her grabbing her hand to squeeze through the pain. He was on manoeuvres.

"Like I'm on cloud nine when I look at you, baby," Ray replied with a toothy grin, making her face burn as Henry groaned. Great, he got all concerned for nothing when in reality, his boss was just gonna use this as an excuse to have a nurse tonight--and he did not want to see or hear that.

"Oh, god. He's fine!" Henry argued, knowing that whilst some doctors might think the man was on some pretty strong hallucinogenic painkillers or something, the reality was that his brain was like that twenty-four-seven.

"I think I might need a kiss to make it better..." was his tongue-in-cheek reply. Oh, the gall of this guy. Whilst (y/n) laughed, Henry wrinkled his nose and turned his back, bored at how with every passing day, with every step closer they got to finally tying the knot, they got touchier and grosser. 

He refused to look as the girl bent to seal their lips together, the sweetest medicine Ray could've received and suddenly, the residual pain faded away and in its place, a burst of energy arrived. Call it energy or desire but Ray quickly felt the need to return home as he sat up in that dimly lit parking lot, following her lips as she pulled away after a minute. If they were at home, he could pull her to a private corner or pull her back down for more but it was cold and open here, not the place for him to go in a second time.

"Later, doofus. We still need to deal with Stainless Steve." (y/n) reminded him as she sat back on her haunches before straightening to her full height. She wouldn't mind playing nurse and indulging him when then they were safely back at the Man Cave, just not when they had work to do first. All that needed doing was getting Steve to jail and then they could revert to their normal lives. Duty first, pleasure second, that's how it went for them.

"Ugh, fine! Let's call the cops on this bozo, they can deal with him." Ray conceded, agreeing that they couldn't have another blood bank incident where they leave the criminal to return to his devices. They began to stroll back to the spot where Steve had been lying, but things weren't as they had left them.

Their criminal was gone, no longer on the ground where Henry had dropped him and in his place, there was a camera crew and that pretty young reporter from KLVY News. Huh. Odd. The news must've gotten wind of what they were up to because they hadn't made the call and no one was around to witness the fighting occurring. Very strange, indeed.

"Uh, guys. Why are they here?" (y/n) asked her doofus and friend as their relaxed stroll picked up into a brisk pace. She thought she'd heard voices earlier but she'd just put it down to kids or some low-level criminals hanging around in the shadows; not once had she expected it to be a camera crew ready for an interview. Okay, that was fine, she could do an interview, it wasn't like she was the sole speaker and they didn't frighten her as they once did. No, this was weird but fine, just another factor in a normal night for them.

"They're probably here to interview us, sweetheart, y'know, 'cause we're superheroes. Come on..." Ray grinned at the thought of being in the limelight and basking in the glory that came with yet another successful takedown of a pesky criminal who blighted the city. He'd take the lion's share of the camera and fame and (y/n) was fine with that; whatever was left could go to Henry because her idea of hell was performing in front of the nation as they scrutinised her every move.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, we need to tell them about the fight!" Henry grinned and sped up into a jog with the couple so they could catch the woman and her crew before they left the scene. This was as close as he'd get to being thanked for what he did, so he took every opportunity to let the praise wash over him, even if Henry Hart would never be thanked or acknowledged.

And so, they skidded to a halt in front of the camera and a frankly stunned reporter, panting from the sudden exercise but they'd made it and that's all that mattered. But what was odd was that the woman didn't look happy to see them, more surprised or dare (y/n) guess...disgusted, uninterested? That was new.

"Hey! Hey! What's up?!"

"What's going on? We're here!" The boys rambled as they swiftly smoothed their hair and painted their best smiles on their faces as they stared down the lens of the camera. Miss Danger settled for just standing there with a soft smile on her face; they could do all the talking because she guaranteed that their words would be infinitely better than whatever she could come up with.

"Are we on the news?"

"Are we live right now?"

"Yes!" Well, that answered those questions. Without even batting an eyelid, the reporter pushed her shock to the back of her mind and tightened her smile, moving on like the interruption was a mere bump in the road for her. Three superheroes coming out of nowhere and crashing her report? That was nothing and she quickly accommodated them, including them because after what she'd just witnessed, she'd love to get their reaction.

"As you can see, I am now with Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger." She grinned into the camera, pausing to look at the heroes in turn as they lined up, Ray subtly taking his sweet girl's hand to remind her that he was there. Like he always said when she worried about being on TV, it wasn't something to stress about, only a chance for them to revel in their excellence--y'know, the usual bigheaded crap that she only tolerated from him.

"So...what's up?" 

"Huh, what's up? What do you mean?"

"What's up with you? What do you mean?" The question came as a surprise for the trio because it was so basic and generic, not the usual snappy ones they got, which were all about finding out the who, when and why.

"What do you want?" Okay, then... This had suddenly gotten very awkward. They were heroes, they'd just defeated a bad guy and a news crew had turned up. What did she think they wanted?

"Well, I figured you'd wanna interview us about Stainless Steve and uh, the people of Swellview might wanna know that the city is safe once again..." Ray replied, smirking as he inclined his head towards the presumably grateful audience at home, but that was when something became very apparent to his sidekicks. Something was lacking, something missing and it was kind of a problem.

"Uh, dude, dude, dude, dude!"

"....thanks to us, so you're welcome--what, what, what?! You're not seeing me on the news?!" Ray snapped as Henry and (y/n) prodded his arm, vying for his attention so they could point out their problem. It was rather important, so even if he got pissed at them, not that he would over such a trivial thing, they did it anyway.

"Uh, Captain, Stainless Steve is gone."

"What?" Ray gawped at his girl's face before taking a look around. She was right too; Steve was gone, vanished, stolen, whatever, he wasn't in the spot where they'd left him. What the--- did they miss something? They'd only been gone a second and in that time, their man had done a runner right before they could slap the cuffs on him.

"Where'd Stainless Steve go?" Ray stuttered, looking just as lost as his sidekicks because they could swear that he was out for the count when he'd been rammed by that rogue car, Great, that was them not going home tonight, it looks like they were off on a search for the metal man, but strangely, the reporter had all the answers.

"He was captured by The Thumb Buddies!" She told them, changing her voice at the end to sound proud and dramatic, but she wasn't making any sense to the three. The what? Seriously, had they missed something? Was she saying that somebody else had stolen their win?

"What?"

"I'm so sorry, what did you say?" Ray and Henry stuttered as they tried to understand what she was telling them. Not being praised and showered with gratitude was like a slap to the face and Ray found himself needing the support from holding his girl's hand, not the other way around, because what the hell?

"You sound like you said somebodys. Did you say somebody's?"

"We captured Stainless Steve--I don't know what she's saying, I'm just trying to explain to her that they and I captured Stainless Steve..."

"Yeah, I don't think she's listening." (y/n) stopped the boys' ramblings as she caught sight of the woman's glazed, empty stare and how she had that expression on her face that only came with experience. Y'know, that expression you develop after dealing with men for most of your adult life; the nod-and-pretend-you're-listening face for when they keep talking and won't shut up. Most journalists have them and this one was just waiting for the heroes to let her return to work.

"Thank you. I'm Kimberly Cross, crossing off." Ray, Henry and (y/n) were left stunned as the woman spoke loudly over their explanations and excuses before tootling off, taking her mic and cameraman with her and leaving them to stand there in confusion.

"Where are you going? Are you done?"

"That's not the end of the interview, is it? 'Cause I had more to say, he was talking and I was talking and--oh, hey, I found the sandwich!" And as the reporter climbed into her news van and drove off, Ray soon found himself with a lot of questions; where had their guy gone and who had stolen the limelight?

"No, dirty!" (y/n) growled as she watched her lover lunge for the remnants of the sandwich he'd dropped after being hit by the car, which she suspected had belonged to the guys who'd snatched their arrest. It had fallen in the mud after that, with one side of the crisp, white bread now stained black and there was no way she was gonna kiss him if he ate something off the ground. God, was it worth it?

"Aw..." Jeez, it wasn't Ray's night tonight. No capture, no thanks and now, no sandwich. At least he had home to look forward to, after all, that concussion might just make a return the moment he stepped foot in his bedroom. He only hoped that there was a nurse on call.

~One week later, the Man Cave~

For one week, there was peace. Not an easy peace, but peace nonetheless. The Thumb Buddies, as the team discovered, were an up-and-coming duo popping up all over town at various little rescues or missions and whilst it irritated the hell out of Ray and Henry, they didn't do anything to stop and find out who they really were and what they were up to. 

So, here they were, one week later, one week older, and (y/n) was still putting up with their bitching and moaning since she wasn't going to get herself worked up over two guys who were just lightening their load. It was the boys who were mumbling and grumbling as they were called out to yet another emergency at the local baseball game, which left their headquarters in the hands of Charlotte, the smart one and Jasper, the not-so-smart one.

"Uh, what are you wearing?" Said smart one asked the not-so-smart one as she stepped out of the elevator and glanced up from her PearPad. Jasper, in all of his genius, had chosen one of the worst shirts he could have possibly chosen to put on that morning and Charlotte knew that the garment was gonna stir up some trouble when Ray got back.

"Oh! This is my Thumb Buddies shirt." That's what was gonna get him hung drawn and quartered.

"Yeah, well, you better take that off," She advised as she strolled past. It was better to warn him now, that way when it all went wrong and Ray was scrambling to wrap his fingers around his neck, Charlotte could at least say she tried to save him. Come on, that shirt was just begging to be ripped off.

"Why?" Jasper frowned, showing just how unaware he was. Had he not met Ray Manchester? The biggest man-child around? (y/n) wasn't always gonna be around to protect him and calm her baby down, so what then? Jasper might as well have betrayal scrawled across his forehead in permanent marker.

"Because, last week, Ray, (y/n) and Henry caught that criminal, Stainless Steve and those Thumb Buddies guys took credit for the capture." The girl explained as if it hadn't been the talk of the Man Cave all week. God, (y/n) must've been exhausted, she had been soothing his bruised ego all week, telling him that it was all right and to focus on her instead, which had been the sole reason for the uneasy peace they'd found.

"So?" And Jasper seemed to have a death wish. Did he want to be thrown into the pot and boiled to death?

"So, Ray and Henry were pretty mad about it and (y/n) can't hold them back forever, so if I was you—" Charlotte's advice ran out as the tubes beeped and dropped, bringing down Kid Danger in the left one and Captain Man in the right one, with Miss Danger wrapped up in his arms. Oh dear, here came the blood bath; if he was smart, he'd take the shirt off now...

"Hey! How'd it go at the baseball game?" Charlotte didn't miss a beat, figuring that if she stayed calm and acted natural, maybe, just maybe, the boys wouldn't notice the abomination that was Jasper's shirt. Ray didn't look in his direction very much anyway and it's not like having two, smiling guys and their names splashed across your chest isn't obvious...right?

"Oh, I don't know, I'd say it went pretty well..." Ray replied with a huge grin on his face as the three came down from the tubes with a certain bounce in their step that hinted to the teens that they knew more than they were letting on. Well, they were in a good mood, that was a positive sign for Jasper's survival and despite how noticeable it was, the hero and sidekicks hadn't seen the shirt yet, rather they were too caught up in whatever it was they had to reveal.

"Uh, yeah, we didn't do that much other than, uh..."

"WE FOUGHT A BEAR!" (y/n) just couldn't hold it in, not when she was still on her adrenaline high. Not to brag but it had been the most awesome mission of her life. Full of danger, full of daring stunts, full of risk, which normally, she wasn't a fan of but she had to admit, seeing Ray tackle the beast head-on was something that wouldn't be leaving her dreams for the next few weeks. It was hot.

"We fought a bear! Yes, we did!" "Oh my god, we did that! We did fight a bear!" Henry and Ray turned into giddy schoolboys as the excitement came flooding out of them too. If (y/n) found it exciting, then they found it unbearable because heaven knows that they sort the danger, stunts and risks a lot more than she did. And judging by how they were screaming in each other's faces, with Ray giggling like a child on Christmas when his nose brushed (y/n)'s, it was quite the battle.

"Hey, hey, hey! What bear?" Jasper butted in, not wanting to ruin their vectoring shrieking but come on, they couldn't just leave them in the dark like that. Screw the bear, him wearing that shirt in front of them and then drawing their attention was risky, but even so, the heroes didn't notice, not yet anyway.

"Okay, okay, so, shall I tell them the story?" "Yeah, yeah, yeah..." Henry asked his boss with a huge grin on his face since he didn't know if Ray wanted to bask in the glory of this and be the one to retell the tale but he was surprisingly fine with it. Of course, he was; he had other business to attend to, such as sharing a post-fight with his sweet girl as the adrenaline high always made it that much better.

"All right, all right," Henry gathered himself as Ray took a moment to tightly hold (y/n) against his chest, her arms wrapping around his neck as their lips met and Henry knew that he had a few seconds to shine, "These college kids brought a real-life bear to the baseball game!"

"Yeah, you know, just to be funny," Ray added as he and (y/n) broke apart. The kiss was good but neither of them could resist being a part of this story, not when it made them seem so epic. 

"Which it was. Dangerous, but funny." The woman added, beaming up at her doofus as his hands stayed on her hips, keeping her close and he was inclined to agree with her. Sure, the bear could have killed everyone on the field but it did make everyone chuckle to see several grown men wet themselves. And besides, it wasn't like Swellview's greatest heroes couldn't handle it.

"Oh, it was hilarious."

"So hilarious," Henry and Ray agreed, the latter smiling down at his sweet girl as she drunkenly giggled at the memory. No one got hurt so it was okay to laugh, right? Of course, if someone had lost an arm or had a leg swallowed then she'd be suitably sombre but since that wasn't the case, it was fine...yeah. It was fine.

"Anyway, until the hotdog guy came out." Henry carried on with the story as Jasper munched on some chips. Any second now, they would see the shirt, once the story was over and they weren't so chipper, that would be it and he just wasn't bothered.

"Yeah, you know weiners?"

"Yeah, I love weiners." The boy nodded through a mouthful of the fried potatoes because he was loving hearing this story as much as they loved telling it. Charlotte was just waiting for him to get rinsed; now that would be the real blockbuster.

"So, the bear, he gets a whiff of the weiners, right? And he just loses his mind! Chases the poor Weiner guy right onto the field!" Ray continued, getting visibly more and more animated as he relived those exhilarating moments. He'd just acted on instinct for the next part, maybe a show of bravado for the crowd watching as well as one lovely young woman in particular, but either way, his reputation was shining brighter than ever.

"So, Ray, being the adorable doofus he is, chases the bear onto the field!"

"I did, I did!" Ray's cheeks flushed slightly under the adoring gaze of (y/n), who couldn't help but feel her tummy flutter when he'd risked his safety doing something that was admittedly, very stupid but also kinda hot. It was selfless and that wild spark of passion in his eye was just another reason for her to fall in love with him, as was the way his hand found hers without even having to break eye contact.

"And check this out. He tackles the bear!"

"I tackled a bear! I tackled a real-life bear!" Ray couldn't help but skip around a bit at Henry's revelation, even if it meant dropping his girl's hand as quickly as he picked it up to squeeze it. Oh well, he was excited, she knew that and it allowed her to admire the man as he glowed with pride and maybe a bit of ego too. Damn, she knew those muscles were big but today, they seemed even bigger. 

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, and the bear gets up, he's like, oooargggghh! And there's spit coming out of his mouth, arrroooghhh! He slashes at me, his claws just scrape right across my face!" Ray exclaimed as if the details of him nearly being mutilated weren't horrific to hear. 

Perhaps that had been a bit of a terrifying moment for (y/n), seeing her almost-husband getting shredded until she remembered that he was Captain Man. There was no need to worry, the pain only lasted for a second and he'd been through worse, no matter how much her heart instinctively bled to see him wince from the claws.

"Oh my god!" Charlotte gasped. She certainly felt the same terror (y/n) had and was wondering how the woman could still be smiling because that sounded awful--the sort of thing that she'd work herself until a nervous frenzy over. And yet here she was, giggling and blushing like a schoolgirl as she drooled over her fiancé, nothing new there but why wasn't she laying down the law? Giving them the third degree for being so reckless? Why had she participated?

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, and I guess that he thought that Ray was gonna go down or something like that but--"

"Instead, the bear goes, ooooraggh! Which I guess in bear language probably means...."

"Uh-oh, this doofus is indestructible!" She was laughing because everything had turned out fine. Why stress about something when you can laugh about it instead? The bear had gone in for the kill, expecting Captain Man to have his innards as his outards as he gnarled and viciously pawed at his stomach and face, but when Ray grunted through the pain and stayed in one piece, all of the danger disappeared.

"Stupid bear had no idea that I can't be harmed!" Ray yelled, gesturing wildly to his still perfect face as (y/n) stepped over to wind her arms around his neck, unable to keep her distance any longer. His hands landed on her waist, keeping her close as the story continued with the same energy, the same longing looks, but just a physical connection that couldn't be ignored any longer.

"We are smarter than a bear!"

"We are smart than a bear!"

"We are the smarter species!"

"Yes, that happened!" And that was the end of that. Charlotte and Jasper were left...regaled as (y/n) finally pressed her lips to Ray's for the first time in minutes because neither of them would ever get enough of that. For some reason, they were just drawn to each other today, more than usual and the high from the fight wasn't helping. They were living their best lives and it showed, no wonder they couldn't keep their hands to themselves.

"Wow..."

"Unreal, man." The teens complimented them on their big win. Charlotte didn't sound particularly thrilled but that was just how she was. It was impressive and like Jasper, she found herself to be quite entertained by the grandeur of it all and speaking of grandeur, (y/n) had a brainwave. If two kids were entertained by the tale, who was to say that others weren't? After all, it's not like that baseball park had been empty, far from it. A couple thousand people from it, to be exact.

"Sweet cheese, we might be on the news! I bet they're talking about us right now," The woman gasped, looking up at her lover with sparkling eyes and his grin grew from the moment she said the word 'news'. Ever since the debacle with Stainless Steve, Ray had been anxious to get a new story in the press to make them all seem like the best team around again, but there had been nothing of substance worth reporting, which left them at a stalemate. Until now.

"I like the way you think, sweet girl..." He smirked and immediately began to lead her over to the supercomputer where they could hear all of their heroic actions being broadcasted to the city. He wouldn't mind seeing an action replay of how she gave the beast a swift jab to the snout after it wandered a little too close to Kid Danger for her liking; even when he was still reeling from being mauled, it was so hot to witness and seeing it again would be a godsend.

"Yeah, let's see what they're saying about us," Henry smiled and so, they all gathered around the computer. The trio stood back a little so they could soak up the story and bask in their awesomeness, which just left Charlotte and Jasper to bring it up on the monitor.

"Okay...coming up, now."

"And Trent, this happened just moments ago?" Mary suddenly appeared on the screen, sporting her usual blonde bob as she looked across at her colleague. Oh good, they hadn't started their report yet, they hadn't missed it. Fresh off the press, that was more like it, so much better than that Thumb Buddies crap.

"That's right, Mary..." Trent nodded, causing a surge of excitement to run up Ray, (y/n) and Henry's spines. Any minute now, they'd announce how awesome they were and then the Thumb Buddies would be history.

"See? They're talking about us!" "Fought a bear, my man!" It was kinda cute just how excited they were and (y/n) wasn't about to complain, not when her hero wrapped his arms around her body and pulled her in close, encasing her in his warmth and the scent of his cologne. She could feel his smile pressed against her neck as he refused to let go of the hug, wanting to hold her there as he heard the praise coming from the news crew. At that moment, life couldn't get any better.

"Okay, now, we're gonna go live to the scene where it all went down and talk with the actual heroes who saved the day." However, you can only go so high until there's nowhere left to go but back down. Their smiles deflated when they heard that because it didn't make any sense. They'd left the baseball field, they were safely anonymous and hidden in the Man Cave, how were they meant to do an interview now?

"What? How are they gonna interview us right now?" Henry asked, looking back at the perplexed couple as the cold seeped into their fluffy warmth. Oh dear, this didn't feel right, (y/n)'s tummy was talking to her, telling her that this next bit of news wasn't gonna be something any of them wanted to hear. 

"Yeah, yeah, 'cause we're here..." Ray muttered and just to make sure that they hadn't been tailed or anything, the boys checked behind them to make sure that there were no pesky reporters that needed a Memory Wiper to the face. That was dumb but the young woman with them let it slide; she didn't want to upset them any further, not when she sensed that Trent was about to cause a shitstorm.

"Thanks, Trent," said the reporter who had been with them the other night, bringing their attention back to their screen and oh, it wasn't good, "I'm here live at Nacho Ball, where a local, sweaty man committed a crime just moments ago."

"What, what, what is all this about?" Ray stammered, looking at his sweet girl for answers as they moved closer to the screen with heartbroken, confused expressions. Their big moment was gone, it had been replaced with a crappy fast-food restaurant instead, which stung. His girl could give him the answer, right? She was smart, she knew stuff, she made things clear with that big brain of hers when he didn't understand, she knew what was going on and it was all fine...it had to be.

"Why are they at Nacho Ball?"

"Don't look at me, I know just as much as you about this..." (y/n) told them. For once, she didn't have all the answers, rather, she was in the dark too, with nothing to go off except her gut and that was telling her that this wasn't going to be easy to hear. Oh, her poor doofus, her poor Hen, they were gonna throw fists first and ask questions later because they took so much pride in being the number one heroes in this town. To be outdone on their turf, it didn't look good.

"Can you tell us what happened?" The reporter asked a miserable looking girl, who seemed to have a perpetual wobbly lip and permanent tears in her eyes like someone had just told her the worst news in the world. Sure, she worked at the grossest Nacho Ball in town, but come on, was life that sucky for her?

"Yeah...Um, this guy, I think his name is Jeff, he ordered a three-ball nacho sack and when he paid for it, he handed me a coupon." The whiny girl described. So far, so...normal.

"But there was something wrong with that coupon, wasn't there?"

"Yeah! It was expired!" Jeez, this girl was whiny. It made (y/n) wonder what had happened to make her so teary because surely, getting so upset over one coupon wasn't worth it, not when her mascara was in danger of running down her face and making her look like a panda.

"Kimberly, we've just received cell phone video of the attempted Nacho Ball crime, so we're gonna show that right now," Trent butted in and suddenly, the viewers were being shown some blurry, shaky footage of what had gone down in the restaurant and suddenly, their suffering made sense. This guy was the author of their frustration, rather, because every time something irritated them, he was always there.

"Okay, that'll be twelve-twenty-one."

"Oh, yeah, sure. Here's a Nacho Ball coupon for twenty bucks."

"Great. I will just ring this up." "Thanks, bro!"

"That's Jeff!" Ray pointed out, knowing that tubby belly, moronic voice and dumb cap anywhere. Of course, it was him, where there was trouble for him and his sidekicks to sort out, Jeff was there too. His arms tightened around his sweet girl as he couldn't help but tense his muscles in aggravation, and (y/n) responded in turn. If she allowed her doofus to get worked up every time Jeff did something dumb, she'd be walking a greying old man down the aisle, not a super-hot hero.

"It's okay, doof. Everyone knows how stupid he is." She soothed him, tilting her head back into a rather awkward angle just to peck his chin affectionately. Ray softened at that and instantly relaxed when his mind focused on her tender love rather than stupid Jeff and the woman was left satisfied when the creases on his forehead relaxed and his shoulders slumped a bit, The ensuing kiss to the top of her head wasn't bad either.

"This coupon expired four days ago."

"Oh, I didn't know."

"Oh, sure you didn't." The whiny girl sneered as Jeff frowned at the expired coupon with knitted eyebrows and in a moment of colossal overreacting, the girl slammed her hand onto the panic button on the counter—the one reserved for when they were genuinely being robbed.

"HELP! THIS GUY HERE IS TRYING TO ROB US!" And that's when everything went to shit. To be fair to Jeff, and (y/n) couldn't believe she was sticking up for him, but it was a bit much how she assumed that he was a robber just because he had a dodgy coupon. Dare she say that she felt sorry for him in a way? The ensuing sirens, alarms and flashing lights were a bit much as he stood there and protested his innocence, right up until someone tackled him from behind.

A tall man with an orange cape leapt onto Jeff's back, slamming him into the counter and wrestling him to the floor like he was a WWE champion. Then, as Jeff was wriggling for freedom from the sudden assault, another guy joined the fray, pouncing on his friend's back and pinning Jeff to the tiles even more, possibly squishing his pancreas in the process too. They'd slapped the cuffs on him quicker than Ray, (y/n) and Henry could blink and upon freezing the frame, they saw who'd upstaged them with such a miraculous counter.

The damn Thumb Buddies.

"Whoa! Gosh, that was the bravest thing I've ever seen." Trent grinned, causing Ray and Henry's mouths to drop open. Okay, (y/n) wasn't particularly thrilled by it herself but they took it much more seriously. For them, it was like a betrayal seeing how these two idiots were being praised for taking down one criminal who hadn't even done anything—and they'd dealt with Jeff hundreds of times.

"Whaaaaat?" "Bravest?!" They gasped, staring at the monitor in disbelief because all they'd seen was a mad scramble to rest an idiot, hardly the stuff of legends. They'd nearly been eaten by a bear, that was heroic and deserved praise and yet they weren't getting any, all because of these two.

"I have done braver things on the toilet!" "Yeah, that is a bit ridicul—oh my god, Ray, what?" (y/n)'s nose scrunched up at how disgustingly dramatic her lover was being, which earned her a sharp shushing from Charlotte. The girl was still trying to listen and whatever troubles they were having comprehending being replaced was interrupting that. 

"Kimberly, are you with the heroes right now?" Trent pressed further, sending the boys into a cold silence as they begrudgingly started to listen again. Did they have to call them that? So what? They did one rescue and now everyone was fanning over them, had everyone lost their minds? Captain Man and Kid Danger, were the brave ones...and Miss Danger too, of course.

"I sure am, Trent," The reporter grinned as the camera cut back to her, revealing to the heroes' disdain that she was now with their newfound enemies, "And once again, it looks like our city of Swellview owes a big thank you to The Thumb Buddies!"

"You're very welcome." "We appreciate that, yes." They weren't anything spectacular to behold. To (y/n) (and secretly Ray and Henry), they just looked like two guys in costumes, which was technically what they were too. They seemed a bit dorky, a bit starstruck by the cameras and attention suddenly thrust upon them but apart from that, they seemed very polite and respectful, maybe even humble for the praise the news lavished on them. It was so damn aggravating.

"Okay, who are these Thumb Buddies? Where did they come from?" Ray asked darkly, needing more than a hug from his sweet girl to let this one go. He needed answers because, despite the report being muted, he could still feel the rage burning through him. This was his city, he'd been protecting it for years and now that there were two newbies on the scene, he'd lost the loyalty of his fans, and everyone knows how Captain Man thrives on the attention—simply doing it as a good deed was okay but doing it to be loved was better.

"Yeah, and why are they in our town, doing our job?" Henry asked too, his lips pursed into a thin, firm line. In his years as a sidekick, he'd grown used to the praise too, after all, he never got any as Henry Hart, being praised as Kid Danger was all he had left to fill that need to be loved. If they were the heroes now, where would that leave them? The professionals, the dependable ones, the ones who knew what they were doing?

"Well, technically, they're making our job easier." (y/n) pointed out, which caused Ray to whip around to face her with a murderous look, almost like she'd prodded her finger in a sore wound. It was a betrayal, how dare she side with the enemy, even if she did make a valid point. His sweet girl, did she like these Thumb Buddies too?

"Whose side are you on?!" He asked her furiously, but the woman didn't flinch under his intense gaze or bat an eyelid when his face got close to hers. If anything, her heart rate increased for a different reason entirely, not that she'd ever let him know that since he was being his ridiculous, doofy self right now. She'd only make a move on the adorable doofus when he was being reasonable, not irrational.

"Oh, we're picking sides now?" She smirked, raising her eyebrows in a way that said she wasn't taking him seriously, more like finding his fury amusing, "You know I'm with you, doofus, calm down.

"...Charlotte, I told you last week that I wanted a full report on these guys. Now, where is it?" Ray switched targets after taking a split second to calm down. Right, his girl would never side with two guys she'd never met and had no plans on joining, which was crazy when he snapped back into the moment and realised just how close her smirking lips were to his. So, he quickly redirected his anger onto someone else, namely Charlotte since he'd given her a task to complete after the incident last week.

"I sent you an email, last week." The teen stated dryly, giving him one of her dead-eyed stares because he was accusing her of slacking off. She was Charlotte, the reliable one, if her boss needed something she'd do it and she wasn't gonna be held responsible if he was too busy getting it on with his girl to realise that his order had been delivered.

"You know I don't read my emails unless you send me a text telling me to read my emails," Ray replied petulantly, trying to not seem like the idiot in this situation. (y/n) knew that all too well, he was so...forgetful, so distracted by things he deemed more important than a boring, old email, so he needed several reminders since he was usually busy eating, showering, napping, training, playing games or loving up her to notice.

"I also sent you a text," Charlotte stated, which was grinding for the man to hear, so much that he couldn't help but growl and reach out with grabbing hands, only for Henry to shove (y/n) into them instead. He could hold onto her for a bit, she could help him calm down a bit because God knows that he needed it and she craved it and it came with the bonus that Ray wouldn't kill Charlotte for his mistake.

"All right, all right, just...hug (y/n), there you go...will you just tell us who these Thumb Buddies are?" The boy then turned to his friend, who didn't know how to tell them that there wasn't much to tell. She'd trawled through every newspaper, every magazine, every gossip column, social media accounts, private records and public information to work out just who they were dealing with. Dorks. Normal, kooky dorks with nothing exciting and nothing to fear, hardly worth getting so upset over because they were people. Merely people.

"They're just...they're just guys. Regular guys, who started fighting crime." She said slowly, trying to phrase it gently, but just how gentle could she be when telling them that there was no dirt to sell to the press or legitimate reason for the city to be fawning over them?

"Then, why is everyone making such a big deal about them?" Ray asked in a distraught tone as his fingers danced up and down his sweet girl's satin-covered spine. It soothed him, feeling the curves and contours of her body, which he practically had memorised at this point, and feeling her forehead rested against his shoulder calmed him even more. He couldn't get mad when he had to stay still and give her affection.

"Well, they're new and they seem nice." Well, he could when Jasper was the one stating facts. God, he said it in such a plain, obvious way and it aggravated everything, making Ray see red. His hands seized (y/n)'s hips and squeezed and he couldn't help but shout, though he did take care to not shout directly into her ear.

"We're very nice!"

"Yeah, we're delightful, Jasper!" Even Henry couldn't help but snap too because he felt the same; they had everything the Thumb Buddies had and more, it was just because he lived in a throw-away society that it wasn't good enough. He'd finally reached the point where he was no longer new and exciting, the same with (y/n) and she'd been the latest to join. They were nothing new, so that meant they weren't wanted anymore...how depressing.

"Jeez, stop shouting, doofus. I think you're overreacting to this." (y/n) grumbled when her moment of peace was shattered because of her stupidly loud fiancé. She'd been enjoying that, had liked just breathing him in for a moment with just his hands on her back and his cologne in her nose, it was intimate yet softly so, just enough to satisfy the unending need to have him close. That is until they got upset again and she accidentally poured petrol on the bonfire.

"Overreacting?! We're overreacting? This is underreacting!"

"Overreacting? Oh-ho-ho, this--this is subtle!" The boys hissed, once again feeling betrayed by her cool response to the news that these new heroes were the greatest thing since sliced bread. That gained them an eye roll because with how many good times they shared, it was easy to forget how childish and proud Ray could be and how that had rubbed off on his most impressionable sidekick. She adored him, both of them, but god, could they be any more annoying?

"Hey! Look how popular those guys are," Jasper suddenly drew their attention back to the news and once it was unmuted, Ray and Henry found themselves with more cause for clenching their jaws.

In the time they had been "underreacting", tons of fans had seen the Thumb Buddies on the news and had gathered in the grungy Nacho Ball, almost to the point where no one else could fit into the restaurant. Each one was waving bits of nacho sacks for autographs or PearPhones for selfies, shouting and proclaiming their newfound love just as they used to do for Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger. All that just for them?

"And as you can see, it looks like everyone wants their tacos signed by the Thumb Buddies. Back to you, Trent."

"And Mary!"

"Looks like the Thumb Buddies are gonna be autographing tacos for quite a while, so if you're in the area of Nacho Ball, you might wanna head on over there and meet them." The report finished with the shining smiles of Trent and Mary and the dark frowns of Henry and Ray, who'd grown more and more livid with each swirl of the pens held by the Thumb Buddies. When was the last time they'd been swamped by fans wanting an autograph? Right, before these clowns turned up with their stupid kneepads and orange jackets.

"Are they--are they kidding me?! Not even a mention of the thing we did at the baseball game?" Ray whined as he plonked himself onto the back of the couch with a sour pout on his face. That prompted (y/n) to wander over with a sympathetic expression written on hers. He might have been annoying her but that didn't mean she didn't understand what he was feeling and looking so sad she couldn't help but intervene.

"Just let it go, sweetheart. We don't need a party for every mission we complete." The woman told him gently, standing in between his legs and stroking her hands over his scratchy cheeks that would be due a shave in a couple of days. The praise was nice but by no means necessary, just knowing that they'd do the right thing should've been enough.

"But sweet girl, I--"

"Wait, wait, wait, stop kissing, shhh!" Henry suddenly shushed their little pep talk when the next story flashed up on the monitor and it was like the producers could hear their prayers. Okay, his assumption that they'd sloped off to the back to makeout was misplaced and a bit annoying but Ray didn't care, not when he saw that the city's baseball match was up next. 

"Didn't even get one kiss, let alone kissing..." (y/n) muttered under her breath as Ray scrambled to stand next to Henry. She'd been building up to that and had been hoping for some adoration from the man since they'd been talking about these Thumb Buddies for far too long. Couldn't they just change out of their uniforms and watch a movie or two? Laze the rest of the afternoon away?

"And now, some news about today's baseball game. The Swellview Sailors lost seven to three..." Trent reported the score and left an awkward gap, which made everyone hang on to his every word for that crucial addition, "Captain Man and sidekicks save the day". However, he said nothing and didn't even crack a smile as his viewers waited for an explanation or development that never came, much to the heartbreak of the boys. "That's it."

"All right, that does it! We're going down to Nacho Ball and we're gonna tell those rotten thumb buddies that Swellview is our town!"

"Our town!" Ray and Henry growled because Trent's failure to mention their heroism for the day meant one thing. All-out war. If these Thumb Buddies wanted to take over their turf then they were just gonna have to fight them for it and they'd see who was the best when they had a proton blaster being waved in their faces. 

"Who needs the Thumb Buddies?"

"Nobody!" It was safe to say that they were ranting and blinded by the red haze of frustration from being ranked second place behind two bozos from nowhere. Were they gonna march into a Nacho Ball and cause a scene because they were jealous? Hell yeah.

"Nobody I know!"

"Exactly!"

"I fought a bear!" Ray exclaimed as they marched off towards the tubes again. It didn't matter that they were tired from an eventful mission, it didn't matter that (y/n) groaned and looked up to the ceiling with a silent plea for some invisible for to make them see sense but it wasn't happening. It was either stay in the Man Cave and hear all about how Captain Man and Kid Danger made fools out of themselves or she bit the bullet and went with them to try and avert disaster. Why did she love this job again?

"Are you gonna go with them?" Charlotte asked her with the same bored tone and the dry look she'd been wearing all afternoon, ever since this problem fell into her lap. In some ways, she admired the woman for being so loyal since not many people would still work after being led into reckless decisions so many times but then again, there was being loyal and then there was being dumb. Which one was (y/n)? Love made her do dumb things for all the right reasons.

"Yeah, someone needs to care since they don't." The heroine sighed tiredly and trudged along behind them, mentally preparing her camera face again since she'd end up in the papers one way or another. It would be something ridiculous like "Miss Danger spotted with Thumb Buddy, has she moved on?" or "Have Miss Danger and Captain Man called it quits?". Stupid, irrelevant headlines that were always far from the truth.

"If I come with you, do you promise to watch that new rom-com with me? The one with Tom Hiddleston in it?" (y/n) asked her doofus as she ascended the steps and wrapped her arms around his neck, ready to go up the tube. 

That was a toughie; on one hand, he loved sitting down to watch a rom-com with her since they were boring but the perfect opportunity to just...admire her. But on the other hand, he'd have to admire her as she admired Tim Hiddlestick or whatever he was called with his stupid suave accent and perfect face. A celebrity crush was a celebrity crush, hardly anything substantial but still. Did he have to see her drool over someone who wasn't him?

"...Fine. Just because I love you." Ray conceded, deciding to indulge his darling girl since she was so graciously following him on a personal mission to bitch and moan at two men he'd never met. Precious girl, keeping him from sinking into self-ruin, he could survive one movie for her, after all, Theo Piddleson wasn't the one who was gonna be waiting for her at the end of the aisle.

"Thanks, doofus. I lo--"

"W-w-wait--wait! Since you guys are going to Nacho Ball, can you pick me up a three-ball nacho sack?" Jasper butted in, thinking with his stomach and not his head--a grave error to make. (y/n) didn't think anything of it, to be fair, she'd probably pick up a snack once they were done berating the Thumb Buddies, but Ray took it much more seriously. He was enjoying a moment with his fiancée, she was about to say those three words that he'd never thought he'd have the privilege of hearing and he'd cut her off. Not cool, man.

"No, we're not gonna pick you up a three---what are you wearing?" Ray stammered and took a double-take when he finally saw what the boy was wearing. This was his gravest error. It was obvious now he was looking at him properly and with those faces smiling up at him, it was impossible not to notice. The lettering, the photo, and him interrupting the moment were infuriating and all of a sudden, he was breaking away from (y/n) to pick another fight.

"What do you mean?" Jasper's hands moved to cover his chest as if he'd been burnt, quick and reflexive. Charlotte couldn't help but grin; her warning had not been heeded and now, he was about to face the consequences for thinking he knew everything. 

"Move your hands," Ray ordered him. He didn't want to sound too harsh, deep down he knew that Jasper was still a kid and he wasn't about to yell, not when his sweet girl and other employees were in earshot but damn it, he knew what he'd seen. Jasper could move his hands over the pattern as much as he wanted, but he could still see those eyes peeking out.

"Jasper, just move your hands away from your shirt,"

"Yeah, you're not in any trouble," (y/n) agreed with Henry after Ray turned to them for help. It was no secret that the kid wasn't slightly afraid of them like he was with Ray, so they'd be able to get through to him hopefully, but those were famous last words that the woman couldn't guarantee. With her, he wasn't in any trouble at all but with Ray, that was a different matter because he'd labelled those men as enemies and he was supporting them, even if he didn't see it that way.

So, slowly, very, very slowly, Jasper parted his fingers, revealing his Thumb Buddies shirt in all of its glory, much to his terror and Ray's disappointment. Someone get (y/n) on hand, he preferred to have his head on his shoulders, not rolling along the floor...

"Wow..."

"Calm down, calm down, it's fine, just look at me, doofus..." (y/n) moved like lightning as she watched Ray's eyes darken. Henry was gonna let her do most of the work since she was the expert at taming Ray but he still offered a hand on his boss' shoulder as another force guiding him back to the tubes. If they could just get him out of the Man Cave, he'd probably forget about this and Jasper would live to make another mistake, another day.

"It's fine..."

"We're all good, just come with me."

"It's totally fine..."

"You good?"

"I'mma just walk away..." So far, so good. Ray melted into his girl's touch like her soft words were working and with Henry helping out, for a moment, the sidekicks thought that they were gonna get away with this one. The man seemed calm and suspiciously reasonable for a guy famed for having a ridiculously short temper and childish personality, almost too suspiciously as if it was all too good to be true.

And it was. Ray just couldn't take it, he couldn't have those sorry excuses for superheroes being showcased in his secret hideout and in a moment of madness, he went berserk. No thought, no beforehand, no thinking things through, he just grabbed a spare blaster from a rogue and began firing to the beat of his frustrated grunts and groans. So much for having a magic touch, Henry and (y/n) were instantly wrangling to get him under control rather than treating him with the utmost care.

"Raymond, put it down, you moron!" (y/n) screeched as Jasper hit the deck and Charlotte hastily opened an umbrella. Oh yeah, that was gonna keep her nice and safe. Jasper was in a similar position, although he at least had the sense to clumsily scramble for cover as (y/n) did her best to get her rogue lover under control, mainly by jumping on his back and trying to steer his fire away from the boy. It was a damn good job that Ray was a shit shot with an even shittier aim because otherwise, Jasper would be a goner as her weight was doing nothing to make those muscles move.

"Ray!"

"Raymond Manchester, I swear to god, if you don't stop trying to kill one of our employees, you'll be walking down the aisle by yourself!" The woman played her trump card by shouting the warning into his ear and as the threat wormed its way through the labyrinth of Ray's brain, his lasers slowly tapered off. 

Alone? On his wedding day? No sweet girl? No Mrs Manchester? Well, he'd wrap Jasper up in cotton wool, beg on his knees for the rest of his life and worship that boy if it made her happy and prevented that terrible possibility from becoming true. 

That gave Jasper enough time to wriggle through one of the holes in the sprocket and hide behind the thick metal as Ray lowered his weapon and Charlotte closed her umbrella. Right, in future, they'd be using the no wedding warning to get him to cease because Jesus, he could've hurt someone.

"Dude! That was dangerous! What if you hit him?" Henry asked sternly as (y/n) frowned and folded her arms. What had he been thinking? She'd never cancel the wedding, not unless something heartbreakingly catastrophic happened, but it had been enough to shock him into stopping, not that Ray shared their worry about hurting Jasper. The only thing he cared about was giving his best puppy dog eyes to his fiancée. Yeah, she'd be needing a bit more than that.

"Oh, it was set to a light stun!...ooh! Wait...yikes!" Ray brushed their worries away because he'd assumed that the weapon was just zapping lightly and Jasper, had he been hit, would have been fine...or not. To his and (y/n)'s and Henry's horror, the blaster had actually been programmed to burn and sear flesh, a setting reserved for their greatest and most hated enemies, not for the kid they were all so fond of.

"Raymond. Get your ass up those stairs before I kick it from here to Nacho Bell." (y/n) glowered at her dumb doofus and he ashamedly shuffled up to the tubes with eyes meeting the ground. He hated how angry she was and how she gave him the cold shoulder as they were packed into a single tube, his arms being the only thing keeping them pressed together because right now, she could barely look at him.

It stung and as the seconds passed, he found himself growing more and more embarrassed by his outburst as they whooshed off without Jasper left behind to lick his wounds. She'd forgive him in a bit but in the meantime? Ray Manchester was firmly on the naughty step.

~Nacho Ball~

Well, this was homey. As shown on the news, Nacho Ball was packed full of people and whether they had gone there for the food or not was irrelevant. The only thing that mattered to Ray and Henry was that everyone and they meant everyone, was collecting their order and then pandering to the Thumb Buddies like over-excited children--which most of them were.

Everyone boy, girl man, woman and toddler giggled and blushed as they approached the small table that the staff had set up for the men so they could hand out free t-shirts, selfies and sign tacos, and for the boys, it was enraging, perhaps even humiliating. There was a time when people used to do that for them, they'd queue around the block just to get a glimpse of their red and blue uniform but now? They were old news, pushed aside for the newest toys in the toybox.

And that wasn't the worst bit.

"Hey, isn't that your obnoxious little sister in there with the Thumb Buddies?" Ray asked as the trio peered through the glass door and assessed the situation, which was when they saw the biggest betrayal of all. There was Piper, fawning over the Thumb Buddies as they gave her a free shirt and signed everything she pushed in front of them. What the hell? She was supposed to love them and be their biggest fan, but that was not what they were seeing. Traitor.

"Yeah...what is she doing?" Henry breathed out as he watched his sister take an obnoxiously happy selfie with their rivals, something which made their skin bristle. Well, his and Ray's skin, (y/n) wasn't particularly bothered, not when she could smell that greasy, not-good-for-you-at-all goodness just waiting for her to buy. They hadn't had lunch yet, couldn't they forget about these guys and just move on, much like she was trying to do about the whole Ray-Jasper blaster incident? Was that too much to ask?

"Uh, I thought she was supposed to be the president of the Captain Man fan club," The hero stated bitterly as he stared at the alarmingly pink shirt that Piper had thrown over her cute outfit and how it proclaimed all her love for those idiots. He, out of the kindness of his heart and perhaps just a little bit of simping for his then-best friend, had made her president of the Man Fans all those years ago and this was how she repaid him? Et Tu, Piper?

"Yeah, she is, but you can like two things, doo--oh, sweet cheese, here she comes..." (y/n) muttered before trailing off as the girl abruptly turned around and headed for the door, straight for the ensnaring superheroes. Oh dear, (y/n) would hold them back as much as she could but even with her best, this was gonna be excruciating.

"Hello." Yep, it was excruciating and they'd only said one word. Before the heroine could tell them that confrontation was a bad idea, y'know, caring so they didn't have to again even though she had every right in the world to just leave them to it, they marched into the restaurant and that was where the awkwardness began. 

Ray stood with his hip jutted out at an angle and even lanky Henry cut an imposing figure as he towered over his shocked sister with a sour expression on his face. There was nowhere for the girl to go and when she looked at Miss Danger for an explanation, all she got was a wince because they were in too deep now to go back, like they were a jealous girlfriend confronting her boyfriend for being with someone else. This shit was getting weird.

"Yeah, hi, Pi---Hello, little girl," Henry added, switching his voice at the last minute when he realised that Kid Danger did not know Piper Hart on a personal level, no matter how many times they'd interacted.

"Ah, jeez..."

"Uhhh, h--hey, Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger. I, uh, didn't expect to see you guys here," Piper stammered awkwardly as her palms grew clammy around her tray of food. It truly was like she'd been caught out, stuck between her new lover and her old one, especially when the boys pettily folded their arms like she was in the wrong. God, (y/n) felt first-hand embarrassment, second-hand embarrassment, third-hand embarrassment, fourth-hand...and so on.

"Yeah, we bet you didn't."

"Yeah, we bet you didn't." Ray and Henry spat, giving a pretty good impression of Regina George as they stood there like a couple of mean girls, bored yet spiteful looks on their faces and for what? Piper hadn't done anything wrong, who said she was switching sides?

"Yeah, well, I--I..."

"Nice t-shirt."

"Yeah, with the Thumb Buddies on it," Ray flicked his fingers towards the hot pink material Piper was wearing, specifically the spot on her chest that had that stupid smiley pic of them together. He could feel his sweet girl glaring daggers into the side of his head and the way she was growing more and more restless by the scene they were causing but he wasn't done yet. Oh, he had a lot more to say, no matter how much his heart was tugging his brain towards the door and the idea of going home, where he could make all of his wrongs right.

"Oh, come on, this is just a t-shirt. It's not like I'm their number one fan!" Piper chuckled nervously and tried to play down the reasons why she'd put the shirt on in the first place. It wasn't a big deal, just a freebie she'd been given by two new celebrities, hardly the legends that were Captain Man and his sidekicks. Of course, she still loved them, but that's not what they were hearing.

"Oh, really? Then explain this!" Ray snapped and pushed the girl to turn around so they could see the back of her t-shirt, which had the icing to go on the traitorous cake. In big, white, stupid lettering, Piper's back read "thumber 1 fan" and as if the pun wasn't bad enough, the meaning behind the words was just another knife in their hearts. She could lie to them all she wanted but they knew the truth; the cold, heartbreaking truth.

"Thumber one fan?"

"Jeez, man..." She made them sick, and if (y/n) was just a little bit braver, she might've mocked them for that. She could tell them that all kids make mistakes but on second thought, she wasn't even sure that Piper had. So she was wearing a shirt with a dumb pun on it that promoted other heroes, so what? 

"Don't you think you're overreacting now, Captain Man?" The woman hissed to the man, slightly turning her back on Piper so she would struggle to hear her. The last thing she wanted was for Piper's view of her fiancée to dip, he deserved to be loved for his bravery, just not his partial stupidity, which was working against her right now. Piper didn't hear her, thank god, but neither did Ray, not when he didn't want to listen.

"Okay, look, I know this was wrong, I just really wanted to meet them, and have them sign a taco and take a selfie but it was just this one time, I swear! It didn't mean anything!" Piper begged them desperately, and alarmingly, she was starting to cross into the "yeah, I cheated but it didn't mean anything" territory of being caught red-handed. Things were starting to echo a really bad teen breakup movie and the boys weren't helping, not even caring when (y/n) tiredly pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. She gave up staying at home for this shit...

"You know what? Just forget it."

"Yeah, we have something to do, so..." And here came the awkward confrontation of meeting "the new guy", or in this case, the Thumb Buddies. They'd had a go at the cheater and now it was time to slag off the one who dared to take their place, which made (y/n) groan loudly and unapologetically as she stomped after them, and Piper watching on forlorn.

"Hey, what's up? How's it going?"

"All right, okay..."

"Hi, yeah, sorry--ooh, nice shirt, where'd you get that?... Yeah, just following my idiot of a fia--boyfriend...hey..." Of course, slagging off "the new guy" had to come with a little showing off too, just to show them who they were messing with and the cheater who they'd given up in the process. 

The room's reaction was instantaneous; once Captain Man, Kid Danger and Miss Danger made themselves apparent in the middle of the restaurant, people began to switch sides. What the Thumb Buddies had previously had was given to them, the adoration, the excited squeals, the constant hellos and how are yous, the phones that were suddenly shoved in their faces because holy shit, it was Captain Man, Kid Danger and Miss Danger! Cue the fangirling/boying. 

Piper stomped off humiliated and (y/n) made a mental note to make it up to her later as she graciously smiled at everyone who greeted her, from the cutest kids with their colour-in menus to the cocky high school seniors who thought they had a chance at taking her on a date. 

Hell, on second glance, even the Thumb Buddies seemed to be stunned and hyperventilating from their presence, which was a huge ego boost for Henry and Ray as they preened under all of the attention that had found its way back to the right people. This was more like it.

"MARRY ME, MISS DANGER!" A churlish voice came from the back, probably from the table of football players in the corner, who thought they were so clever with their cheap cologne and playground popularity. Okay, Ray loved the attention but not when it reached this point, not when the odd idiot around the room failed to read the signs that those shoes were already filled, never to be empty again if everything went smoothly. 

So, much to the squeals, jealousy and thrill of the others in the Nacho Ball, he slung an arm around (y/n)'s waist and pulled her close to his chest to show those morons, wherever they were in the sea of people, that this little fling of theirs as the magazines called it, that he was already set to have her as his wife. (y/n) blushed and shyly rested her palm on his chest as she ignored the camera flashes, acutely aware that this was gonna be posted online in a few hours, and the last thing she needed was to be scrutinised for all the wrong reasons.

They'd been so careful with what they'd fed to the press. Sure, there had been speculation on just what stage their relationship was at but there had been no official, definitive announcement for the world to savage, pull apart and sulk about. No hearts had been too broken because for most, they were still boyfriend and girlfriend. That wasn't serious, it couldn't be, please, tell them that Captain Man hadn't settled down and please, tell them that Miss Danger hadn't settled for less than she deserved. Still, no time like the present and some provoking to shove things in the right direction. 

"All right, everybody out! Right now! Customers, employees and the gunches who keep asking my fiancée to marry them, we have official business with the Thumb Buddies, so goodbye!" Ray gave no fucks. 

Without a second thought, he and Henry grabbed the portable tannoy system from their belts, which were rarely used, and ushered the crowd from the restaurant, although they weren't as obstructive and annoyed as you might think. No, they were far too preoccupied with Captain Man's very public announcement that he and Miss Danger were...engaged? 

Someone call KLVY because sweet cheese, this was huge! Some were shocked, some were whispering excitedly with their friends, some were disappointed and one girl was straight-up crying. Guess she had quite the crush on one of the heroes that had now been obliterated.

"That's right, one foot in front of the other! You can walk and murmur about what I just said at the same time! You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here..." The man was shameless and having Henry back him up wasn't helping as the trembling Thumb Buddies rose from their seats and (y/n) stood frozen like a statue. Had he just told a room full of people that they were getting married or was she just crazy? It was gonna happen at one point but jeez, she wasn't expecting that...

"You okay, sweet girl?" A soft voice suddenly sounded and she snapped out of her daydream to see that Ray was back by her side after shoving the last person through the doors. For such a huge guy, he sure could be silent when he wanted to be and despite his bumbling size, he was never rough, not with her. Well, not unless she wanted him to be, but right now, she wasn't talking to moron Ray, she was speaking to darling Ray, the one who'd gotten down on one knee and given her a ring with the sweetest words she'd ever heard.

"Yeah...you do know you just told everyone we're engaged, right? The whole world will know now..." (y/n) whispered to him as one hand settled in her lower back and the other picked up her left hand, one finger stroking over the place where her engagement ring would be if she wasn't in uniform. 

It was...new, maybe a bit overwhelming but still a good feeling to know that everyone else was caught with them, which meant no more lies and rumours about how they secretly hated each other and everything was for show. This was nice, impromptu, but nice.

"Let them know. I want the whole world to see how much I love you," Ray whispered after tenderly kissing her cheek, his lips moving across to ghost past her ear. It tickled, made her blush and caused a grin to spread on her face at the sentiment; she would've thought he'd be shy and reluctant to let everyone know his business since professions of love weren't gonna bolster his tough-guy reputation, but this was the opposite. Newsflash: Captain Man's soft spot revealed.

"Is that...okay with you?" This man. This fucking man, could he be any more perfect? Sure, it was too late to go back on his words but still, her comfort came above everything for him and unlike most, he never missed a chance to make sure everything was okay between them.

"More than okay. It's perfect, doofus...I love you," (y/n) replied gently, unable to stop herself from saying the words she'd been denied earlier because this was just a micro-step in them getting closer and closer to the big day. Everything was still in the infancy stage with very little planned apart from a rough idea of who was going to be there and doing what yet they were getting there, very slowly but very surely. 

Now, Henry was a patient boy, especially when it came to these two. He could take the kissing, the random breaks they seemed to take to say some mushy stuff and even their borderline obsessive behaviour when it came to needing physical affection every five seconds, but he had his limits. Okay, one smooch and that was him done; this was a Nacho Ball, for god's sake, hardly the time or place and the Thumb Buddies were getting restless. Time to intervene.

"Uh, Captain Man? Miss Danger?" He cleared his throat as the kiss lingered on and on and on. Maybe he was a killjoy but when they had interrogations to do about who these idiots were and where they had come from, he had to draw the line somewhere, especially when he'd allowed the moment to stretch on for as long as he had.

"Ugh, fine, you can have him back..." (y/n) pouted as she relinquished her hold on her doofus and accepted that he couldn't be soft and squishy forever. Out here in the world, he wasn't Ray Manchester, he was Captain Man and she was Miss Danger, with nothing to shield them if they revealed who they truly were. He'd go back to being an ass and she'd have to wait until they were back home to see the real him again.

"Now..."

"You two..." And just like that, they were back to it like nothing had happened in between. The boys descended into intimidation again and (y/n) prepared herself for awkwardness by folding her arms and acting as uninterested as humanly possible. What was though, was how excited the Thumb Buddies looked. To most people, Ray and Henry would look pretty terrifying right now but all they could muster was a constipated look of delight. Maybe it was nerves?

"We don't know where you came from..."

"We don't wanna know..." Still, no change in their expressions, even as they edge closer. Could it be possible that the Thumb Buddies weren't the dastardly villains that Ray and Henry had painted them out to be? (y/n) couldn't say for certain, but they looked so happy, perhaps a little too happy...

"But I'm gonna tell you something right now...okay, why are you smiling at us like that?" Ray asked as their grins unnerved him. It was kinda difficult to act all mean and serious when they weren't flinching or shaking, this was the opposite of what he had been expecting. Why weren't they scared? Why weren't they begging for forgiveness? Come on, he was supposed to be giving them what for.

"Joey...I--I--I think I'm gonna faint..." The smallest of the men stuttered to his friend as his wide eyes stayed on the three heroes, his hands grabbing onto the taller man's arm as if he needed to steady himself. Jeez, were they that imposing? (y/n) had always seen herself as quite friendly and approachable, but when she gave them a reassuring smile, his eye did a funny twitching thing. 

"Just--just hold onto me."

"I'm gonna faint!"

"Just live in the moment, okay? Just breathe and live this moment," The tallest of the two, Joey apparently, encouraged his friend, who began to take deep, calming breaths that seemed to settle his nerves. Joey was hyper too but he hid it much better than his friend with the moustache, who, despite his breathing, still needed to hold his arm for support as Captain Man swapped some confused looks with his sidekicks.

"Okay...OH, GOD, WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!"

"I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS REAL LIFE!" All of their attempts to stay calm were in vain because the moment they let down their guards, it all came pouring out. It was slightly alarming to be shouted at about how much they were loved, so (y/n)'s hand sought out Ray's as her calming measure, but they were used to it. Screeching fans were an occupational hazard for them and these guys were no different, even if this was a complete three-sixty on what they had been expecting; "the new guy" was chill? Go figure.

"Okay, what is going on?" Henry demanded as he watched two normal if slightly oafish men fanboy over him, his boss and his boss's fiancée. Had he missed something? He'd expected this confrontation to be dramatic and angsty, not dorky and amicable because they were supposed to be the replacement and they were supposed to be the jilted exes...or something to that metaphoric effect.

"I think they're a lot nicer than you originally thought," (y/n) murmured without taking her eyes off of the men. Ray's hand squeezed hers and it was enough to not get nervous but the confusion was still there; Charlotte had been right, these two were nothing special, just two dorks in strange costumes who decided to be vigilantes. Oh, how she hated to say I told you so...

"It's just...the only reason we ever decided to be crimefighters--"

"--Is 'cause we want to be exactly like you three!"

"We humble ourselves before you..." Ray, Henry and (y/n) were speechless as the THumb Buddies revealed their almost devout love and loyalty for them but also knelt to the ground and bowed their heads as if they were in the presence of royalty.

Okay, perhaps it was a bit extra, demeaning to them, and embarrassing for the trio to be revered as superiors but it was also kind of flattering, and definitely a slap in the face for Henry and Ray. You could say that they hadn't just got the wrong end of the stick, they'd chosen a completely different stick entirely, one that was far from the truth.

"These guys are all right."

"Yeah, I'm starting to like these guys..." And just like that, Henry and Ray's opinions were turned on their heads, much to the frustration of (y/n). They changed theories as quickly as they had formed them and only when they were faced with irrefutable evidence, not someone else's wisdom. Her wisdom, they'd ignored it and now, they looked like idiots. Jealous, moronic idiots.

"You could've just listened to me, but nooooo. Miss Danger just likes to listen to herself say smart stuff, she doesn't want anyone to actually follow it." The woman growled sarcastically and slapped them both upside the head for pissing her off. One of these days, they'd listened to her when she said something to save them from trouble and then, they wouldn't end up in tricky situations. Y'know, like having two men kneeling before them.

"Sorry, sweet girl--I mean, uh, fellas, you may rise before us." Ray stammered a quick apology to his precious girl before grabbing his microphone and addressing the Thumb Buddies like he was their king and they were pitiful peasants. He was loving this; as much as he'd. hanged his mind to see them as equals, not enemies, he refused to let them know that because he was the experienced, dog-eared hero who'd saved the city from peril for twenty years or more. They were just starting out and as such, needed to show him some respect.

"Look, guys. Y'know, the whole superhero thing, it's sort of my--oh..."

"Emergency..." (y/n) muttered as Ray was interrupted by the quiet beeping of his phone. An emergency call was being put through and it wasn't like he could ignore it, even if he was about to tell the Thumb Buddies that Swellview was his city, no matter how much they helped or won the hearts of its people.

"They're getting a real emergency call!"

"I know, I know! Shhhh! Shhhh! Shhhhhhhhh!" The smaller man shushed Joey as he freaked out. So far, all they'd managed to pull off was stopping petty thieves and scavenging the leftovers of Captain Man's fights, so they'd not properly sunk their teeth into a meaty crime yet. Therefore, the notion of a genuine emergency, one fit for only the best, was cause for them to get giddy again.

"I should probably take this. If you'll excuse me..." Ray inclined his head towards the vigilantes politely and sloped off to the side to answer the call as the Thumb Buddies spluttered every respectful phrase they knew. To be honest, Ray could kick their dog and spit on their grandmothers and they'd probably say thank you, that was just how much they loved him. (y/n) and Henry, however, had no idea what to say, their boss normally led the talking for them.

"Where are you going?"

"We don't know these--we don't know what to say! Don't you dare walk out--oh, god." The sidekicks spluttered as Ray walked out the door with just a loving look over his shoulder at his sweet girl and nothing more. Oh, that was chivalrous, leaving them in it. Now, it was gonna be awkward and the pair prayed for a conversation point to make itself known as they slowly turned around to face the Thumb Buddies again.

"So..." Good start from Henry, certainly better than whatever (y/n) had planned as their watery smiles paled in comparison to their enormous grins, "The Thumb Buddies. Cool name."

"Nah. It's stupid..." Joey said bashfully, making (y/n) smile softly at how friendly they seemed. They weren't the brightest pair she'd ever met and they definitely had a childish streak in their personalities but it kinda reminded her of Ray and the playfulness that endeared him to her. They were dorks but she was famous for liking those, doofuses specifically, so hearing them be so hard on themselves strangely struck a nerve.

"Don't be so hard on yourselves, it's cute. How did you come up with it?" She asked with as much interest as she could muster in her voice.

"Well, Mark and I used to be dance instructors," Joey started. He and the smaller, moustache man, now known as Mark, began to lazily demonstrate one of their old routines, making Henry's smile falter from the awkwardness and (y/n)'s grow from how...endearingly quaint they were. What was it with her and dorks? She didn't fancy them or anything, far from it, she'd already found her perfect doofus for that, but they were so nerdy and weird she couldn't help but relax. 

"We taught the elderly to dance," And with an explanation like that, she was sold. She liked these guys, they were the kind of people she would've hung out with in college. Misfits and weirdos.

"But we never really felt fulfilled, y'know?"

"We felt like a couple of...nobodies." They went on, making Henry nervously look back at the door every five seconds as (y/n) kindly listened intently. He wanted Ray to come back now, he wouldn't tolerate a long-winded life story that made him want to tear his eyeballs from their sockets, he'd tell them straight and that'd be it. How long could one phone call take?

"But then, one night, we were having dinner with my sister and she says, you guysth!"

"'Cause she talks with a lisp!" Mark chuckled as Joey slurred his speech to be a bit more comical, enough for (y/n)'s gentle smile to twinge as they enjoyed retelling the story. Someone kill Henry now, he was having a dork overload and it was bad enough spending eighty per cent of her time with her and Ray being dorks in love.

"She does! She says, you guysth! You don't have to be nobodiesth! You can be sthomebodies!"

"And we were like, Sthombodies?!"

"Which sounded like Thumb...Buddies!"

"So now, that's who we are."

"The Thumb Buddies!...Boop!" Well, that was an adorkable story and to top it all off, they seemed to have like a strange, handshake thing which involved pressing their thumbs together and squeaking, which was...normal. Henry was getting a vibe here, a very specific vibe that came from a very specific kind of dork. 

Y'see, over these years he'd become an expert in what he called dorkology--the study of dorks, mainly because he worked for one. Ray was a dork, specifically a doofus, and on the chart of dorks, he was somewhere in between a nerd and a dweeb, possibly edging on being a sap but nowhere near being a dunce. Frankly, he was a dork but not a Thumb Buddy dork.

It all sounded very complicated but by Henry's calculations, Ray might have been a dork but he was a dork who got the ladies, very well by previous accounts. A dork who found themselves a mate in the wild was rare and it was only specific groups who could be so lucky. Many dorks found themselves unappealing to the females of the world and often, there were not nearly enough dorkettes to go around, so Ray finding his perfect bookworm dorkette match in (y/n) was a stroke of star-crossed fortune. 

The Thumb Buddies weren't so lucky though. From where he was standing, he noticed that they weren't blessed with the looks to accompany the personality so, unlike Ray, they weren't doofus, they were dimwits. Dorkette-less dimwits.

"So...I'm guessing you two aren't married." He stated after a brief second of study and placing them securely in the dimwit section of the dork chart. Judging by their amused scoffs and chuckles he was right and judging by how (y/n) knitted her eyebrows and glared at him, she didn't like that. Yeah, on the female dork chart, she was a bookworm, bordering on being a nerd, techie or weenie.

"Nah...just wait for the right girl!"

"That special someone!"

"Where is she?"

"Keep looking! If Captain Man can get someone as perfect as Miss Danger, we can too!" They laughed awkwardly as (y/n)'s cheeks flushed. Dorks couldn't go for the same dorkettes, doofuses were a higher ranking of dork so they got the prettier dorkettes, which was how a moron like Ray won the heart of (y/n), the borderline genius. The Thumb Buddies were on a lower rung, less likely to find themselves a girl since they weren't super-hot, super-cool walls of muscles like Captain Man.

"Trust me, it's worth the wait," (y/n) advised with a gentle smile as they awkwardly tittered about being loveless, much to Henry's amusement. Oh, he loved studying dorks, especially after spending a few years in the field waiting for two to finally discover that they were true dorks. A very complicated science, but rather interesting too, and speak of the dorky devil...

"Kid, sweet girl...Stainless Steve is on the loose." Ray panted as he sprinted back into the restaurant, having just gotten off the phone with Charlotte with some bad news. All of that hard work last week and for nothing because that metal bastard had evaded the useless police before he could be locked up. 

"What? Again? I thought the cops had him," (y/n) practically deflated when she heard the news, although she perked back up again when his arm curled around her back and rested his hand just above her butt. Y'know, she'd get to go home at some point, she'd get to change into some comfy pyjamas and nap at some point too, but of course, the job came first.

"They did, but he got away and now, we gotta go get him again," Ray replied tiredly, soothing her worries by rubbing his thumb against her satin-covered skin. He hated the idea of going through all that effort again but they were the guys to do it. Who else would?

"All right, okay, all right, we're sorry guys--" Henry sighed and turned to the Thumb Buddies, expecting them to understand that they had to go do some serious hero work but to his surprise, they had other ideas. This was their chance to do some proper crime-fighting, not the odd punch-up they had been doing recently.

"No! No, no, no, no, can we go with you?"

"Oh, please, let us come with you!"

"You gotta let us come with you!" Joey and Mark yelled, screamed, and begged the heroes to let them accompany them. Getting in on the action of a real Captain Man and Co fight would be a huge boost to their confidence and they'd finally get a taste of what being a superhero really meant. It was the chance of a lifetime and even if it made them seem a bit desperate, they couldn't help but run and circle the heroes to stop them from walking through the door without taking them first.

"Uh, no..."

"I don't think that's a good idea..."

"We don't usually do guided tours of crime scenes..." Their excuses came quickly as they thought about the prospect of having two inexperienced, untrained noobs following them into what could be a highly dangerous situation. What would happen if Steve was particularly vicious on his return?

Sure, the Thumb Buddies' enthusiasm and endless energy were a bit annoying, the upstaging even more so, but they couldn't let them get hurt. No, having them in the background would just leave them to make mistakes because it was just another thing to worry about.

"I'll rub your shoulders on the way!" Joey offered, which was an odd thing to put on the table. Ray's shoulders were tense, fair enough, he carried the weight of the world on them at times, but he had a very willing girlfriend to do it. (y/n) was more than happy to lavish her doofus with affection as she eased his pain. Seeing him tilt his head back and hearing him groan and praise her dextrous fingers was a dream, but admiring and having her lips on his broad shoulders and neck was bliss.

"What? No, I'm sorry, boys, but I'm the only one who rubs Cap--"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!" Or not. (y/n) snapped her head in Ray's direction when he interrupted her gentle protests with a raised hand. Okay, was he considering this? She wasn't going to but she could rub his shoulders if he wanted that, he didn't need a Thumb Buddy to help out. Consider her thoroughly confused. "You'll rub my shoulders?"

"Sure!"

"You got good hands?" Rude, much? Her hands were great, probably smaller than Joey's but still powerful. She punched people for a living, there was power in those paws. And yet, apparently, he didn't want her doing that. What was Raymond's game?

"Yeah!" Joey exclaimed and raised his hands to show Captain Man just how big they were. He could cover more ground and get at those knots. He just needed to say the word.

"All right, let's go..." There was the word. Henry and (y/n) stammered and staggered after the hero as he casually walked past the celebrating Thumb Buddies and out the door. (y/n) had to practically jog just to keep up with him as the men put on their serious faces and swaggered behind them, which left her with a minute to ask a question. Why?

"My shoulder rubs not good enough anymore, doofus?" The woman asked as she caught up enough to speedily walk beside him, although there was no malice in her tone, just a genuine curiosity as to why he'd allowed two amateur vigilantes to tag along. There had to be an ulterior motive, she just couldn't see it.

"You know I love them, sweet girl, but if you're behind me, I can't do this..." Ray smirked as he slowed down to a casual walking pace, one that was much more suited to her shorter legs and the Thumb Buddies' out-of-shape bodies. For a dork, he sure could be cryptic at times and despite her borderline genius, she couldn't always figure his riddles out, not until he put the engima into practice.

"Do what? I don't under--oh my god, Raymond, that's so good..." Her knitted eyebrows soon relaxed--all of her muscles did from their tense, confused state--when Ray dipped behind her and two huge, enormous, massive, colossal, warm hands rested on her small shoulders and began to manipulate her muscles in a way that could only be described as magical.

Seriously, he was clumsy and poorly coordinated at other stuff but with this, he was an artisan., so much that she didn't realise her slip-up as the pleasured sighs fell from her lips every time his thumbs ran across her spine.

"That's Captain Man to you, sweetheart," Ray purred into her ear as his body forced hers to keep walking, even if it was barely a crawl from how much they'd slowed down. The Thumb Buddies were enthralling Henry in another one of their fascinating stories and even though they were distracted, they were catching up, not that (y/n) could even think about going faster. It was hard enough putting one foot in front of the other as his fingers swirled across her shoulders, let alone coming up the brainpower to focus on anything else.

"Yes, Captain..." She whined breathlessly, trudging along with only him on her mind. It wouldn't last forever, eventually, his fingers would cramp up and her muscles would stop feeling so good but for now, she was gonna soak it all up. It was worth it just to feel him shiver against her when she called him by that name.

~A shady house, the backyard~

It wasn't unheard of for athletes to have their shoulders rubbed before a big match, rather, it was common amongst boxers and the like, y'know, the ones who got riled up too quickly and needed to calm down before their focus snapped. That wasn't the situation for Ray, he never got wound up enough for that to happen but one thing was for sure, his mind had never been calmer in the buildup to a fight.

Joey was right, he did have good hands and they were working magic on Ray as they approached a suspicious-looking house in a quiet neighbourhood of Swellview--a little too quiet if you asked (y/n). Much like he'd done with her, Ray was loving the shoulder rub, so much that (y/n) was happily hearing him mumble rubbish to her as he loosely held her hand and rambled. Something about prettiness, weddings and...food? That pretty much summed him up.

As they approached the backyard, things started to get creepy, so it was a good thing that at least one of them could relax. The Thumb Buddies felt fine; with Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger leading the way, they felt unbelievably protected and the sidekicks wished they could say that. Sure, they were confident in their abilities but (y/n)'s tummy was talking to her as they snuck around the old, creaking house and into the backyard, the last known location of Stainless Steve.

Of course, he couldn't have chosen the park or the rich estate to hide, no, he had to hide in the dark and in the neighbourhood where the trash collectors seemed to be on strike. There was crap scattered everywhere, ranging from an old, abandoned sofa to chip packets to an old orange cone, this place was gross, not that Ray seemed to mind that much as he sneakily checked their surroundings with Joey massaging his shoulders and (y/n) safely tucked into his side with her fists ready to swing.

"Kid, you see anything?" He questioned Henry as he walked in behind him, Mark on his tail since they'd each decided to take a Thumb Buddy into their responsibility. They'd hopefully stay safe that way but it was so dark and the bushes were so built up that it was almost impossible to catch a glimpse of shiny metal anywhere. An ambush would be so easy in a place like this...

"No, nothing. You sure Stainless Steve ran this way?" Henry asked as Joey began chopping at the man's spine, causing his ensuing groan to sound funny. They'd been walking around for ages and had seen nothing, which was starting to make him nervous.

"That's what the cop in the police helicopter said, maybe he---ahhhh. Ahhhh, this guy's hands are like magic," Ray grinned as the guy behind him kept rubbing for much longer than his sweet girl ever could. Not to be mean or anything since he'd adore her until his dying day but sometimes bigger hands were just better. They could cover more ground and go on for longer, not to mention the fact that this way, he could have a massage and look at her.

"Thank you..."

"You know, if you're not careful, he'll grab onto you and never let go. It's what happened with me." (y/n) joked as she witnessed Ray's dopey smile and Joey laughed as the hero's cheeks flushed pink. It was a fairly accurate description of how they'd ended up the way they are now; they met, they fell in love, they latched onto each other, never to let go again. It was that simple.

"Hey, hey, hey, look! Footprints...leading up to the shed," Henry suddenly interrupted, pushing all of the jokings to one side as he noticed some familiar prints etched into the dirt below their feet. Too deep to be any of theirs, kinda like the wearer had been weighed down, possibly due to the impossibly heavy metal jacket they always wore. It was him, wasn't it? Steve was in the shed and all they had to do was sneak up to it and nab him, Easy.

"Oh, hey! Do you guys think that Stainless Steve is hiding in there?" Mark asked under his breath. Ten points to the Thumb Buddies for a brilliant deduction; he might have been hiding in there, might being the keyword. Steve could be sneaky when he wanted to be, so every clue was to be taken with a pinch of salt because, in this game, there was no chance to restart if you walked into a trap.

"Yes."

"Probably..."

"Well, we don't know until we look..." The trio replied as they cautiously eyed the shed, pondering about how they were gonna go about this one but for Joey and Mark, that wasn't an option. This seemed like a simple enough mission, just going in and grabbing the villain, so what they asked next seemed like a no-brainer.

"Ooooh, let us go in there and get him!"

"Yeah! Let us do it!" They begged yet again, wanting a chance to do some real crime-fighting for once without having to stick to small operations or mere lucky finds. The last time they'd dealt with Steve, they'd just stumbled upon someone else's hard work and stolen the glory, but this time, they wanted to do things properly. If they'd let them, that is.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no..."

"That's not a good idea, guys..."

"It's probably best to let us handle this one..." (y/n) said in line with her friends. In her experience, no mission was ever as easy as it appeared and if they allowed the Thumb Buddies to proceed and then they got hurt, well, that was on them. They were the professionals, they had the knowledge, weapons and backup ready if something went wrong. Mark and Joey didn't, not that they were listening to that reason.

"Please! If you guys will just let us do this, it'll make us feel like we really did something..."

"Like--like our lives have meaning..." Well, when they put it like that, it was nearly impossible to hold the tears in. (y/n)'s watery eyes met Ray's as she and Henry looked to him for the final say and she wondered which side was winning the war in his mind. 

She'd seen it before, hell, she used to be like that, an inconsequential nerd with nothing more than a nine-to-five life as her future when all her heart secretly longed for was an adventure. An odd longing for one so naturally nervous but she understood what they were feeling--the need to belong to something, even if that something wasn't something tangible, like morality or the belief that some things were still good and wholesome and worth fighting for.

"Captain Man?" She asked with hope in her voice, wanting to hear his judgement on the matter so they could put the men out of their misery. He was the boss, he made the call, not her, not Henry, him. What had he decided?

"Well...all right."

"Okay, you guys can get him," He caved, that was his decision. (y/n) broke out into a smile when his softer side came out to play again. Maybe he didn't need his name on this capture, perhaps letting them get a taste of what fighting the big dogs felt like, after all, he remembered what it was like being the newest hero on the scene and trying to find his big break. And seeing the proud smile on his sweet girl's face as they celebrated just sealed the deal; yeah, he'd chosen correctly.

"For real?!"

"Seriously?!" You could say that they were a bit happy at the news, possibly ecstatic. Just a bit. 

"But be careful! We don't want to have to scrape you up off the ground and into a bucket..." (y/n) quelled their excitement as Henry shushed their squeals; the last thing they needed was to give away their position because rule number one for espionage was to always try and have the element of surprise. That was their first lesson, the next lesson was not getting yourself killed before you'd even started because they didn't need the guilt on their consciences.

"Yeah, I don't want those fabulous hands getting hurt," Ray added, which made (y/n) frown at his simping as the Thumb Buddies grinned and blushed. This was it, their moment had come just as Joey's sister had said; time for the dorks to find their place in the world.

"Totally get it, totally get it!" Joey laughed it off as Mark came to face him and then, their smiles dropped into serious, stern expressions, which were completely ill-suited to their natural goofy personalities and whacky costumes. "Okay, man...this is it."

"I love you." Bit much? Bit of bromance going on? It made the heroes share a slightly confused look at how bluntly Mark said it but they understand the sentiment, it was cute. Ray loved (y/n), (y/n) loved Ray, Henry loved (y/n), (y/n) loved Henry, Henry loved Ray, and Ray loved Henry, their unit was built upon trust and a strong friendship, more in the couple's case. It was a good sign and lesson three was to always have your partner's back.

"Yeah...who are we?!" Nobody batted an eyelid at how Joey didn't reciprocate because of how weirdly touching the scene was as they entered lesson four - opening lines must always be cool and must always boost your confidence.

"THUMB BUDDIES!!! Boop!" They shouted as they mashed their thumbs together before charging into the shed with a battle cry sounding out into the night sky. Mark went in first with Joey stumbling over his heels as the wide-eyed superheroes watched on, ready to step in if they needed to but then the doors slammed shut and they assumed that they had everything under control. Until they didn't.

To their absolute horror, shock, terror, surprise and whatever, the shed wasn't a shed. Instead, it was a cleverly disguised trap, revealed when the flimsy, wooden walls fell to the ground with a slam. The trap itself was rather disturbing yet brilliant; a tiny, compact rocket with just enough room for two or three people to squeeze into it if they wanted an uncomfortable jaunt into space and through the small viewing window at the front, they could see the men's terrified faces pressing their noses against the glass. Oh god, they'd said to be careful.

Lesson five, charging in is nearly always a dumb idea. Be the tortoise, not the hare.

"Well, that's weird..." Ray stated as he blinked at the rocket. (y/n) was unable to form words as her hand slapped over her mouth at the peril the Thumb Buddies found themselves in and it didn't take a genius to work out that they were panicking. Well, they would be somebodies after this, the first idiots to not want to go to space. How had it all gone so wrong, so quickly?

"Hey!"

"What's happened?!" Joey and Mark screamed above the noise of the engines starting up, the strange hissing and gentle vibrations of the metal making them feel sick as they realised that the door had been bolted after they ran into the pod. All heroes had bad days but these guys had the worst luck in the world. Not to be a pessimist but it looked like their bad day would be their last...

"Uhhh, uhhhh, we don't know!"

"You seem to be in a rocket," Henry told them as they tried to think of something, anything to help out. They should've known it was a trap, just walking into the shed to make an arrest was too easy but they were the ones who'd wanted to save the day. Their mission, their rules, their tactics. How could they help when they were still figuring out exactly what had happened and how?

"Uh, but don't worry! Everything's gonna be--"

"Activate main engine... Prepare for launch..." (y/n) could tell them not to panic all she wanted but when the rocket's automated voice came on and the thrusters started to fire up and spark flames, it didn't matter. They were panicking, she was panicking because she just knew that they were meant to be the ones in that damn rocket, not the Thumb Buddies, who were just fledging fighters, totally unequipped to go into space.

"Fine?---" 

"Ignition...goodbye." Before she could offer any counsel or advice on how to shut the rocket down, the remaining thrusters kicked in and the shuttle started to shake, rattle and...fly. Screaming and pleading for their lives, the Thumb Buddies watched with pale faces and bloodshot eyes as Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger stood frozen on the lawn, getting smaller and smaller until they were like ants on the ground. 

They were up in the stratosphere before they even spoke again, unable to process that the one time they decided to accept some superhero interns and they accidentally sent them to the moon or something. Definitely not a mission to give to KLVY and certainly not their brightest moment.

"Well, I'll be darned..." Ray muttered as their necks stayed craned at the stars, watching the rocket into it was nothing more than a shooting star crossing the galaxies. (y/n) could swear that a tear rolled down her cheek as they became yet another star in the inky darkness; it was all so damn poetic, they'd wanted to shine and now they would but no one would ever know who they were admiring when they looked up at the sky and happened to see them floating past. They'd be immortalised in space and free to wander the cosmos as the Earth kept spinning...would anyone miss them?

Her thoughtful reflection was broken as delighted cheers broke the quiet of the night and when she finally brought her gaze back down, she saw that it was Stainless Steve. He'd crept back into the garden and was cheering at the sky as he watched his rocket disappear, which was no doubt his cunning method of getting rid of them once and for all. If only he noticed how he'd only succeeded in sending the wrong heroes.

"Goodbye, Captain Man and Kid Danger! And you're stupid little fiancée! Enjoy getting hitched in outer space for the rest of your---lives..." His screams were cut off as Ray, henry and (y/n) took a few steps forward and when the metal man turned around, he was met with their stony expressions. Oh, how they wanted to kick his ass into space too, maybe he'd bring their newfound friends back when he returned.

"You tried to trick us!" Ray realised as he looked from Stainless Steve to the path the Thumb Buddies took and back to his stupid shiny face. Right, it all made sense now, they were meant to run in there and get caught, not those guys. They had just been a very unfortunate accident, sneaky, little...

"You tried to shoot us into space!"

"No! No, I didn't!" Liar, liar...aluminium foil on fire. Steve cooly looked off to the right as they caught him out as if lying about what had just happened right in front of them would change anything. They might have looked dumb but they weren't, unlike him in his stupid metal outfit and facepaint. Why couldn't he just use a ski mask like most villains?

"You did too! We just watched your rocket fly away!" (y/n) spat, stepping forward as if she was about to punch the guy, but Ray's hand quickly caught her wrist to stop her from doing anything rash. She was upset, he could see that from her quivering bottom lip, so there was no knowing what was going through her mind and he didn't fancy letting her stand up to Steve alone, not when he was ready for a fight too.

"Yeah, so? What are you gonna do about it, girlie? Run and hide while Captain Man saves your pretty little ass?" Steve growled, taking one step closer so (y/n) could feel his breath fan across her face as he sneered. Contrary to popular belief, Miss Danger did not need the assistance of Captain Man because she was not a damsel in distress, nor was she afraid to fight her own battles, no matter how much Ray wrapped her in cotton wool sometimes.

"I hope for your sake that you've got metal everywhere..." She smiled sourly, watching as the confusion flickered over his features for a second before she took the plunge and kneed him right in the balls. Yeah, it was all well and good having metal plates sewn into your jacket but when you forget about the squishy parts, none of that really matters. 

Steve crumpled to the dirt and Ray and Henry witnessed the scene with wide eyes and their breath caught in their throats as the small girl took down a guy, who thought he could intimidate her. Well, here's to no little Steve's running around in the future. 

And just for good measure, Henry found a discarded, crusty soda cup lying on the ground, which was filled with a suspicious liquid that could have been soda or something more human, so naturally, he savagely threw it at the man's body, hoping the smell stayed with him for days. 

Ray would've done something too, he would've ensured that the villain stayed down until the cops arrived but he couldn't take his eyes off his sweet girl, who couldn't take her eyes off the rocket above their heads. It was just a speck at this point, only just in view and whilst she lamented the loss of the Thumb Buddies with Henry, he struggled to control his racing heart. It wasn't his fault that she was so hot when she fought.

"This is bad..." Henry said after a minute or two and he wasn't wrong. What could they do? They could muster the Schwoz's love shuttle and follow them but there was a strong chance they'd be dead by the time they managed to launch. Everything came back down to Earth eventually; the rocket wasn't big enough to fully explore the depths of space, and nor did it have the fuel to do so. It would circle the planet a few times, perhaps stray away just a little and then get caught by gravity again, at least, that's what (y/n) predicted. Was that good or bad though?

"Shhhh! We don't know what happened..." Ray silenced his sidekick as he snapped out of his filthy thoughts and promptly made a ruling on the matter. What the news didn't know wouldn't hurt them, right? As far as he was concerned, the Thumb Buddies were strangers to the Man Cave team and the night's events never occurred, which was cruel but what else could he do?

"Doofus, what are you talking about?" (y/n) asked with a frowning face. Sometimes, her dorkette just didn't get his dorkiness, not when she was racking her brain for a solution that didn't involve spending millions of dollars on a rescue mission.

"We were never here."

"We were never where?"

"We were somewhere else..."

"Where?"

"I wasn't here, and neither were you. In fact, I was at home with my fiancé all evening..." Oh, now she understood. Henry jumped onto his almost evil plan almost immediately as the man seized his girl by the arms and began to drag her away from the "scene of the crime". (y/n) didn't like it not one bit, but she allowed him to take her anyway--the mens rea to follow the actus reus as it were. Were they just gonna walk away and deny everything if the Thumb Buddies ever cropped up in conversation again? Yep, looked like it.

"Said Captain Man today in court when the prosecuting attorney questioned his whereabouts on the night of the disappearance," The heroine muttered bitterly as they scampered away from the house and back towards the Nacho Ball where they'd left the Man Van. 

It wasn't a long walk but it certainly looked suspicious for any lowlife witnessing three superheroes running away like they were the bad guys. Perhaps they wouldn't snitch when the police came knocking on doors and asking questions?

"You got a better idea, sweet girl? Other than going home and watching that rom-com with Ted Iggle-Piggle?" Ray asked with soft yet serious eyes because he was up for suggestions, anything she could give him, he'd take. She had to believe him, he wanted to do something about their...predicament but he had no idea how to get those fellow dorks back. Maybe a good night's sleep in each other's arms would bring some inspiration.

"His name is Tom Hiddleston, and no, I don't. I have nothing..." (y/n) replied tiredly, not even having the energy to twitch the corners of her mouth into a smile. Going to bed and chilling with a crap movie did sound nice and her doofus always knew how to take her mind off the bad stuff that waited outside the four walls of their bedroom. 

Sleep always brought better thoughts to her and who knows? Tomorrow might just give her an idea of what to do or maybe her worry would fade in the night, and honestly, she didn't know which was better. A hopeless struggle that might just fail or the prospect of carrying the guilt of never knowing for the rest of their lives? Her famous last words:

"Perhaps it's better to just forget. After all, I doubt we'll ever see them again..."

[dragonwarriorgal]

I watched the finale of Shadow and Bone S2 and here are my thoughts

Oh, god. I miss Baghra and her sassy old bitch routine, but Jesper can hopefully fill the hole in my heart.

Nikolai had a limp?

Man, we sure were lucky that the Smoke Men didn't kill or rip Nina apart...

See Nameless Jacked up Grisha? THIS is how you say your final words. Though I do give yours credit, your "ruh, roh!" was the funniest final words 🤣

I love Mal being all

in the scene after he is just brought back to life

Ok, I gotta admit the "The Five of Ketterdam!" line got me🤣🤣🤣

MILOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Ok, the bee call back is a little cool, I'll give you guys that

All I know, 24 min left of this episode, is that I don't want Nikolai to turn into a smoke monster. I mean I want A DESIGN OF A MONSTER! Not some smokey cloud barf!

Look at Inej walking up to the ship in the background like a badass coming like "No, this is MY SHIP BITCHES!". And Inej and Tolya together

I can get with that love triangle

Pekka Rollins... a prisoner... announcing the fight in the prison where the guards have been putting prisoners to fight each other and other creatures, LIKE HE PUT THIS WHOLE SHTICK TOGETHER!?

you know the funny part about the fight scene in the prison and all that drama? It would have been more impactful and believable HAD WE NOT SEEN THE SCENES IN THE PRISON ON HOW THIS ESCALATED TO WHERE WE ARE NOW!!! Like imagine THIS scene is the first scene we see after Pekka's comeuppance. I would have believed he would have made it at this point in the joint. But because the way we were SHOWN HOW he came to being up there calling all the shots is just S.T.U.P.I.D. at least to me that is. I would have liked the mystery of how he got up there, I would have liked to think "oh, that cunning bastard! of course he would be running the place!". But, no... the mystery was being slowly revealed to us and now there is no mystery for this...

this is my reaction to the reveal of Nikolai's monster design:

and the reveal

Ok, so they are doing the jurda parem story line?

Not gonna lie, my face was doing this

after the last shot, I was wondering if Alina still had her powers after reviving Mal. So this is a nice twist to leave upon for season 3

If you have made it this far and are wondering if I have anything more to say about this season of Shadow and Bone (probably not lol), then yes, I do plan on doing another thing with Shadow and bone but by doing a shallow to mid deep dive into the series as a whole, as when my brain can't shut up when I am going to bed, I decided to record my ramblings inside my head so that I can get more sleepy if I express all the tabs I have open in my brain as I try to close them up for the night. It will maybe be a video, it honestly depends on how busy/procrastinated I will be. So look forward to that (or not, whatever floats your boat)

This post is dedicated to David 💔

[noirgasmweetheart]

Apologies, I absolutely would never deliberately arouse anyone. Now, concerning the subject of discipline, I do have concerns about some other PL characters, from a purely professional standpoint.

Specifically....

The Baron

We've speculated on him surviving and getting rescued from the plane, but if he's rescued by the wrong side, he's in trouble. His cover has been blown; and he's no ordinary enemy agent, he's the ringleader. The CIA, the KGB, Mossad, Scotland Yard, or whatever national intelligence agency grabs him, is going to have questions. He's going into a James Bond(age) contraption of some form or another. Of course he's trained to reveal nothing but his very long name, equally long rank, and probably even longer serial number. So he'll be there for a while. (Until his captors release him because they're so sick of sitting through all that.)

The General

For a secret agent, the Hairless Mexican isn't very discrete. He's bound to get captured eventually. Whether tied to a chair or locked into a James Bondage contraption, the eccentric pervert will probably enjoy it more than his interrogaters. He'll probably demand to know when they get to the waterboarding, like an impatient bratty child.

Joel Cairo

Sam Spade, why would you give him back his gun after he already stuck you up once? If Spade was really so smart, he'd have tied Cairo up while he was unconscious on the sofa. A thorough detective would also do a thorough strip search for more weapons.

(Also, "When you're spanked you'll take it and like it!")

Johnny West

Instead of enabling Johnny's alcoholism, why don't Icey and Gabby just tie him to that bed, so he can't wander off? They might have to gag him to keep him quiet, but it's for his own good.

Ugarte

For God's sake, would you trust this little wombat to roam around unleashed for even five minutes?

Rick knows that Ugarte is the criminal all the cops are looking for, and that Ugarte isn't taking many precautions about it. Holding the visas for him was a nice gesture, but if Rick was a real friend, he'd save Ugarte from his own stupidity. Rick should've hauled him upstairs and tied him to a bed, to keep him out of sight. And gagged him, so he couldn't draw attention to himself.

We all know what happens if he doesn't. Ugarte gets himself captured. Strasser and Renault want to know where those visas are. Ugarte--chained up, shirtless, sweaty, with hair fallimg over his face--still won't talk. So Strasser orders a waterboarding session.

"With what water?" Renault asks. "We're in the desert."

Enraged, the misinformed Major takes his fury out on his helpless prisoner, with a sadistic new torture: a TV set is wheeled into the cell, that plays every single episode of the "Casablanca" TV series--both of them. Ugarte is left to binge the abominations while Strasser and Renault take their leave.

Two days later, Ugarte is halfway through the '80s series, weak and on the brink of insanity. His brain (not his greatest strength to begin with) is about to break for good, when at the last minute, Rick bursts in with guns blazing like Galahad. Rick shoots Ray Liotta right between the eyes, shattering the TV screen. The saloon keeper takes the little parasite in his arms and hushes him, assuring him that Srrasser is dead, Renault's switched sides, and Ray Liotta's acting can't hurt him anymore.

Cornelius Leyden

Leyden was lucky that he entered the room as Eric was finishing up searching it. Had he walked in much earlier, Eric would likely have tied Leyden up to keep him out of the way while he searched his room. Most likely he'd have tied him to that canopy bed, spread-eagle, and threatened to sit on his face if he made a sound. ("And I'll warn you Mr. Leyden, that I indulged in a large helping of beans for lunch, not half an hour ago!")

Marius

Marius is no stranger to bondage. Or foot fetishes. Or belly fetishes. He probably has a DeviantArt account. But I digress. Old habits die hard, and Marius would more than likely be caught stealing something aboard that ship, forcing Claude Rains and the Fat Man to chain him up in the brig. He might have to take off his shirt for some lashes as well.

Janos

This actually happened, but by that point in the movie we were all too depressed to care.

Mr. Moto

That ridiculous yellowface makeup isn't fooling anyone. The enemy agents who've captured him demand to know "Mr. Moto's" real name and nationality. Of course, Moto allowed himself to get captured, as part of an elaborate plan. He Houdinis his way out of the torture device, beats his enemies, and then confesses to their dying ears his real ethnicity, pealing off the mask: "I'm Nigerian."

"Island of Doomed Men" (1940)

[uncouth-the-fifth]

you're the only person i follow who mainly posts about kripke era spn so i just gotta ask, is it just me or does season 2 already feel vastly different from season 1? like obviously they went through a lot of crap in the span of a year but i just restarted the series and something about the way Sam talks to Lenore (the vampire lady in bloodlust) is so different from how he used to be in season 1. (i also hated that that was the beginning of his style change but whatevs no more silly tees and hoodies for Sammy cause he's a big serious hunter now i get it). and Dean, i can't really put my finger on it but he's also changed so much from the guy who whacked his brother on the arm and called him a control freak after literally not seeing him for two years. like i get that trauma changes you but going straight into s2 from s1 it just feels slightly off, even the vibes of the episodes. i talk a lot about how the first five seasons are superior to the rest of the show but i think i'll just forever be a s1 supremacist. honestly idk if this is something other people are aware of too or if i'm just crazy. maybe it's because supernatural first starts becoming very comical in season 2, like introducing casa erotica, that stupid p*rn website dean is obsessed with, and probably more, all this making the series less realistic (i mean it's a show about monsters but still) than it was in s1. in my opinion, spn was a lot better before it was trying to be all self-aware. genuinely would like to know what you think about this tho cause i know you're amazing with your words :)

WOO BOY, have i been stewing on this ask for a bit. i didn't want to rush to answer because i wanted my response to be thorough, but i have SO many feelings about this. i never make spn meta posts (if this could even be considered that) cause I'm not the greatest at articulating my thoughts on the show, so bear with me. i could also be throwing stuff at u that u already know, and in that case ignore me lol

there is a pretty big gap between the first and second seasons, but it's not something i immediately thought about reading this ask because, technically, they're the closest plotwise. the hunt for yellow-eyes begins in season 1 and ends at the devil's gate with season 2. we have the overarching apocalypse arc that has its feet in the first five seasons, sure, but s1 and s2 specifically share the same villain and the same cross-season motivator: kill the thing that killed mom.

but i thought on it a little more and i agree with you!! there's a clear tonal shift from devil's trap to in my time of dying, and i think that's born mainly from factors outside the show's plot. supernatural moved from being a potential one-and-done to a whole multi-season show, and the showrunners had audience reactions to reference when writing too! the monster-of-the-week cycle was interesting, but people watched the show to see, y'know. sam and dean drinking beers and crying on the hood of the impala. the plot was the most fascinating part, so naturally, the show became more involved. while season 1 was clearly a monster-of-the-week type beat, season 2 keeps that rhythm while weaving plot-heavier episodes throughout. i also think that killing off john is as clean and concise a shift as the writers could manage: if the entire first season hinged upon finding dad, and dad dies s2e1, well. any step away from the waters the show was born in, that endless hunt for john, is going to feel foreign. and john's death is a huge hit to both boys, so automatically their characterization shifts for that season too. sam loses the boyish haircut and dean irons out into an even grizzlier hunter. i don't trust kripke or anyone at the CW to make writing choices this purposefully, but you COULD say that the effect you're talking about is supposed to reflect the boy's lives when john dies. off-kilter and standing up on shaky legs. but i refuse to give them credit for that <3

if i'm telling the truth i really like when the show gets more involved. but i think why others might feel the opposite is because, after 14 seasons layered thick with plot that only gets messier and messier as times goes on, the disconnected adventure from season one feels more special!! they don't have heaven to worry about yet!! or an apocalypse!! things were simple, and the show was just about two brothers on the road trying to rebuild their family. it's uncomplicated. s1 is also the landing strip we hit every time we return to the show as a whole, so it's more familiar, and therefore more intimate than any other season!! (for those who watch in order at least lol).

[sehnsuchts-trunken]

Back with a slightly more serious request, but do you have some headcanons for what it would be like to be one of the knights while also having chronic pain? Feel free to ignore this of course, it is quite specific lol

are you kidding me laurie, you're giving me a wonderful idea here, as if i could possibly ignore any merlin requests, especially from you, that's just ridiculous. ofc i'll write this! i was debating for a little bit whether i'd do all of them separate and then throw in some romantic aspects as well but i decided against that, so we'll see how this turns out and if maybe you're gonna have to deal with all of them as potential love interests too

- First of all, this is assuming you’re randomly joining them in that episode at the end of season three, kind of like Percival but not at all like Percival. No associations, except for possibly Merlin. Don’t ask me how, maybe you were a merchant who coincidentally came across them and knows how to use a sword. Maybe you’ve been trying to become a knight all your life. Who knows. Anyway

- At the start, it takes a ton of explaining for them to understand. Like, a ton. Some of them may get it easier, but you're gonna have to spend like an hour explaining it to Arthur and Percival (the latter is very concerned). I think Lancelot and Elyan will actually get it the fastest, idk Elyan just strikes me as the type who doesn't mind it much and Lancelot's just so respectful that when you say that you can manage most days, he accepts it and moves on. He's not fussing, he doesn't need to understand all of it, he just needs to know that you're okay.

- The way this came up was probably because you had a bad day and five out of five knights got sO worried thinking that you were injured somehow that they gave you negative two seconds to explain and instead wrapped you in every type of clothing they could find and made you warm soup and checked like four times for any blood and either Percival or Gwaine 100% carried you, depending on if you were in Camelot definitely straight to Gaius.

- After explaining, it also takes the same amount of, if not more, time to run by them if and what help you need, and whether you want it, and how you want it, and especially how you want them to treat you. Like you definitely need to be comfortable talking about your boundaries with them, because let's be real, basically only Lancelot is able to somewhat pick up on social cues without necessarily looking for them.

- But in the end once you've talked about it, they try their absolute best to remind themselves and each other of this. It may take a bit of time for them to get around to treating you like they did before and it certainly takes a lot of time for them to (if you said you're comfortable) go physically "rougher" again like they do with each other.

- Whatever you do and say you should never underestimate how absolutely willing these men are to work and to help and to support. Like whatever you say about your illness will count as a law to them - if you ask about this, they'll just repeatedly shrug and tell you that "it's your body and you know best" and then continue to do literally whatever you ask for.

- At some point, if sooner or later after that first introduction to your illness, you come up with basically a whole manual for different kinds of days. If you say you're having a good day, they'll know to treat you differently than when you say you're having a bad day. And as I said: they're literally ready to do whatever.

- Percival will always offer to carry you and when Gwaine sees you're doing worse he absolutely will too, though genuinely I would advise you to choose carefully based on whether you want to be and feel safe (pick Percival) or just have a fun time with a high risk of bumping against trees and walls and horses (pick Gwaine). Like the others will probably carry you as well and if you ask, definitely without any sign of discontent, but Gwaine and Percival are the ones who are most likely to offer themselves all the time.

- You'll make a wonderful knight anyway, none of them would ever dare question that or your skills. They won't pretend you're a baby. They'll give you chainmail and a sword and take you into battle to fight alongside them. They'll armwrestle you and make you collect firewood and Arthur will still have you take watches and still give you all responsibility for the horses at night.

- They're very, very protective though, so you can bet your ass that if there's something that they can avoid happening to you they absolutely will. Even if this is just a little task that's easily done. Like, they'll do anything ranging from sweeping to fucking killing a guy. Imagine Gwaine cheekily manoeuvring a wet towel out of your hands and cleaning the table you made a mess off, or Arthur straight up giving you days off of patrol to do it himself. This is not at all something to say "you're ill, you can't do this" because they know that you can, this is just a "This could possibly inconvenience you so I'm doing it for you"

- okay as I said I had some romantic things in mind beforehand, so last but not least I'll quickly get those out of my brain all in one and all in very quick, very short sentences:

Gwaine would make a point of picking flowers and collecting sweet, small things for you to distract you when you're having a not so good day, it's basically become a ritual.

Percival would make sure not to leave your side and, if you're okay with it, always have his arm around you or have you lean your head on his shoulder, just a little physical contact for grounding.

Lancelot would spend even more time with you - if you don't send him away - so that first of all, you're never bored, always having someone to talk to, and also that if you do need help, you won't need to wait for it for an hour.

Leon would be a bit of all, just being there with you, helping you as much as he can and as much as you allow. just handing you the water bottle before you can ask, helping you onto your horse, stuff like that

and I don't know shit about Elyan so

[trackermons]

yknow what i am subjecting tumblr to this as well

ID/plain text ver under cut

(image description: multiple discord messages by user possiblytracker)

ok no i lay down and rolled over to go to sleep but then i got blindsided by thoughts so are you ready for a short ramble

i think the evolution scene this episode really hammered home the fact that it is about the bond you have with your digimon. 100%

hiro and gammamon have been doing it since episode 2 because they got really close really quickly. hiro's looking after him, they're allegedly Siblings™️, gammamon fucking loves hiro and hiro loves gammamon! they get along! but that's not exactly hard to do and it wouldnt take as long to build a strong bond as the others evidently did, all things considered. kiyoshiro and ruli are different because their digimon arent like, younger than them, or like some kind of weird dog or a five-year-old- they're individuals in their own right and they have their own interests and lives outside of their partners (i mean APPARENTLY apart from angoramon but i'll get into that i promise)

jellymon thinks kiyoshiro is fucking hilarious and is basically going "i could fix him but whatever the fuck is wrong with him is funnier". their whole relationship started out on her fucking with him relentlessly and finally getting attached after he proved himself capable under extreme stress, and i think that's most likely what she thought was endearing about him in the first place dhjdfv.. earned him her respect if you will. up to this point i think he's come around to her quite slowly- like, it's probably initially hard to become good friends with someone incredibly intent on causing problems on purpose everywhere you go- but they have been bonding! and the evolution this episode was the culmination of that! they really do care about each other, despite all the shit she puts him through, and this episode lowkey made me slightly emotional dshdnb like thats LOVE. not in the romantic sense (please god not in the romantic sense im still glaring daggers at the writers room DO NOT MAKE IT WEIRD) but they're PARTNERS. they're not just vaguely comfortable with each other (not that these two ever were in the first place hgSHDJ) but they've got a real dynamic going on and care about each other so much despite everything

if you hadnt noticed i get real fucking sappy about digimon-partner dynamics this is not a new thing i have been on this bullshit for years anyway leading onto my next point. ruli and angoramon Apparently are just around each other all the time. they don't argue, don't butt heads, angoramon just kinda follows her around and protects her from danger and listens to her music and recites weird poetry at the end of every episode like huh. they're super comfortable with each other's presence. but at the same time that's literally all it is. unlike with kiyoshiro and jellymon- jellymon is pushing, kiyoshiro pushes back, creating Problems and being endearing and giving them meaningful interaction with each other no matter how based around messing with people it is- ruli is the one doing the pushing (into dangerous scenarios, digimon hunts, etc) and angoramon is just going with it. he's not pushing back. they've never actually been in a situation in which conflict between them has been created and i think thats actually what's holding them back from evolving yet. They're comfortable with each other but have they bonded? are they partners? i don't think so, and i do think next episode it's that bond that's finally going to be tested before angoramon can evolve

anyway yeah that's my theory thanks for coming to my ted talk

/end ID

[xpeachesncream]

perfectly wrong | one

summary: there were rules that had to be followed: no one could know about you two, there was no ‘getting to know each other,’ and there was absolutely no emotional attachment allowed. if this could be done, there should be no complications. but somehow, the rules always get bended.

pairing: reader x fuckboy!kth

genre: college au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 2301

chapter warnings: cussing, mature language, very slight angst, some hints of jealousy, alcohol consumption

notes: pls remember that this is set a few months after you and tae have been going at it, so it will seem like things are happening a bit fast. i’m not trying to prolong this series. also most importantly, i tend to usually write shorter chapters > shorter, but more chapters published. enjoy!

> series masterlist <

Jungkook decided he was going to see if he could jump over your couch and land perfectly in a seated position.

"Wait, wait, wait. Absolute silence everybody." He says as he's stretched over, trying to estimate the timing and height of his jump. He had always been super athletic and competitive since you two were small, so there was really no changing his mind on this. He always had to prove something, even if that meant creating his own competition of jumping over the couch.

"It's just me and you." You watched him from the kitchen, making sure the pizza in the oven was baking properly.

"I have an audience, okay? Don't be rude, Y/N." He says as he points over to the fake audience clapping and laughing during a 'Friends' episode.

"Whatever, as long as you don't go breaking my shit, Jeon Jungkook." He was 22, but his mentality was 8. That was for damn sure.

"Siiiiiiilence." He says at a whisper, his eyes shut as he puts a finger to his mouth. He lets out a huff and a puff before he gets the courage to throw himself over the couch and land a perfect landing. "And once again, he sticks the landing!" He stands up with his hands up in the air.

"You're annoying." You laughed, getting paper plates ready for the pizza that was about to be done because you were in no mood to do any dishes tonight.

"Thank you! I'll be here again tomorrow, same time." He calls out to his fake audience.

"No the hell you're not."

"Ouch, nevermind. Someone apparently doesn't want me here." You laugh at how dramatic he is. At this point, you just let him be because that was something you always loved about your bestfriend. He embraced the kid in him and always brought good times. You had similarities, but you also had some major differences. You liked being in your comfort zone & you were labeled the innocent nerd amongst your friends. You just like to consider yourself simple, though. A 'take it day by day' kind of person. Kookie was fun, adventurous and childish at times. He was also shy, but loud at the same time? An introverted extrovert, you could say.

But you loved each other nonetheless, that's why you've clicked so well since you were young. You taught each other things & grew together.

"Here, fool." You placed the pizza in front of him with the paper plates.

"Set it up, I'll grab us the drinks. You want anything in particular?"

"That bottle of Stella Rosa, please." JK knew you loved that Stella Rosa, so he happily grabs the bottle and two wine glasses. He plops back next to you on the couch, pouring your glasses and grabbing a heaping serving of 4 slices of pizza.

You both decided you want a good laugh, so you throw on Kevin Hart's newest installment: Zero Fucks Given. It isn't long before you both are rolling on the floor, almost gasping for air at how much you're laughing at Kevin Hart's stand up. The pizza is gone, the wine is gone, and you're still feeling pretty tipsy. The whole thing sounds nice, until your head starts to wonder what Taehyung is doing and if he'll text you to come over tonight. You know he probably already has plans with another chick though, and that hits you.

Curse this fucking alcohol.

Let's get this straight - the only time you 'talk' is when he's trying to fuck.

And yes bitch, you let him do this to you. You're out that door before you can even fully slip your shoes on. Dick is just that good. It's something about Taehyung that makes you addicted. The way he gives you a stupid ass smirk when he opens his door, the way he touches your skin and gently lays his shit on you until you both become really invested in the moment. So invested that shit hits the roof. It gets messy. It gets rough. It becomes unspeakable.

You aren't friends. No one knows about you two, or that you even know the other exists. You don't know shit about each other. The only thing you know is that he's fucking other girls. He has a whole roster, you'd imagine - a starting five, at least.

He doesn't care about you, and for the most part, you don't either. At least, that's what you like to portray because it's been some months now since this whole thing started and you can't help but feel some kind of emotional tie to him. You're leaving your house between 12-2am in the morning and sleeping in his bed until 6-7am. It's a routine; a routine you've become used to. You skip out on some late night kick-its with your friends cause you anticipate a text to come through from him.

But, he doesn't care. You aren't the only female slipping into those sheets, and boy does it fucking make it hard to swallow. Reality hits hard when you think about it and you feel this huge pit in your stomach. You try to be different, you try to stand out one way or another. But it doesn't work that way. You knew what this entailed going into it, so it makes zero sense as to why you're hurting and getting jealous from time to time.

You know it still doesn't matter to him.

He's only fucking you over cause you let him. You know damn well you're not gonna change and let this go, though. You love thrill of it too much. It's the most thrill your life has had. You're not perfect and you're only human. You make mistakes, but this one definitely puts the cherry on top. Because not only do you refuse to learn, but you let it repeat itself over and over again.

"Aishhhh, my stomach hurts from laughing too much." Jungkook laid his head back and patted his belly. "But that was good though. I needed that."

"Yeah it was. Thanks for coming by to watch that with me, Kook." He tilts his head over to look at you and smiles.

"Sure thing." He checks his phone and sits up. "Yoongi is blowing up the group chat." You check your phone to see multiple unread messages from none other than Min Yoongi himself.

[yoongi] 10:37pm: aye

[yoongi] 10:45pm: all of a sudden, everyone is ghost in this group chat?! you all had a lot to say not too long ago.

[yoongi] 10:52pm: even though you guys are fake as fuck, does anyone wanna come with me to the bars tonight? meet at my place so we can head out.

You and Jungkook laughed at how butthurt Yoongi was in the groupchat. Yoongi definitely was the most serious and blunt one in your group, but he still liked to party and have a good time. It was just how he was. Hoseok was always full of energy and probably the most extroverted one out of all 4 of you. He was never shy. You and Jungkook met Yoongi and Hoseok your first year in college and became inseparable ever since. You all just click with your different attributes.

[jungkook] 10:53pm: lmaoooooooo

[yoongi] 10:53pm: fuck you dude lol

[jungkook] 10:54pm: i'll come through in a sec, i'm at y/n's right now. not sure if she's gonna come though?

[y/n] 10:55pm: i'll pass, i'm tired and wined out.

[hoseok] 10:55pm: ahahahah yoongi shut up, blowing up my phone for no reason. i'm passing on tonight too. im tired from working that overtime *cries*

[yoongi] 10:56pm: you both are boring. i'm especially offended at how i didn't get an invite to your little powwow, y/n. and now you don't wanna hang out?

[hoseok] 10:57pm: she mentioned she was going to watch kevin hart's thing yesterday and offered us to swing by if we wanted to though....... selective hearing, maybe?

[y/n] 10:58pm: ^ okayyyyy and that's on period! thank you hobi <3

[hoseok] 10:59pm: anything for the baby

[yoongi] 10:59pm: lmao you're a brat, y/n. whatever, i'm still hurt by you both! kook, hurry on over so we can drink

"Fuck I regret this, I'm gonna die." Jungkook laughed as he stood up and stretched. He quickly helped you clean up before he figured it was time to go or else Yoongi would have a fit.

"I feel like it has to do with that one girl he's been talking to on and off."

"Perhaps." Jungkook shrugged before putting on his shoes. "We shall see." he sighs before giving you a tight hug. "You sure you don't wanna come out?"

"Nope."

"You don't even have plans tonight."

"Yes I do."

"Doing what?"

"Laying in bed." Jungkook snorted as you shook your head and shrugged. What else did he think you were trying to do? He should know you by now, at the very least.

"Alright, I'm not even going to argue. I'm off."

"Be safe, have fun, text me if you both need anything, okay?" He nods as he shuts the door, leaving you to your lonesome. You swirled the teeny tiny drop of wine leftover in your glass around before picking up your phone.

No new texts. Well, let's be specific: no new texts from taehyung.

You did forget to respond to your oldest cousin though, when he was just trying to check up on you.

[seokjin] 8:35pm: pssst y/n

[seokjin] 8:35pm: psssssssssst

[seokjin] 8:35pm: oyyyyyyyyyy

He was damn near 30 years old and hated talking on the phone so much that he decides to blow up your phone this way. But, he was the cousin you loved dearly and you had a very tight, sibling-like relationship with him. He was like the older brother you've always wanted. He watched you grow, protected you, kept you safe, supported you and cheered you on - especially when your family talked so much shit about how you and him weren't gonna get anywhere with your goals. You know, the fucking stupid ol' saying of 'chasing your passion isn't going to bring you money & wealth.' Your family was all about the titles and money, but Jin was passionate about cooking and wanted to open his own cafe. You, on the other hand, wanted to pursue your art. Jin was the biggest role model for you because he was the first to defy your family's wants and wishes. He was the black sheep of the family with a huge 'I don't give a fuck' mentality and he taught you that along the way.

Don't ever be afraid to do what you're passionate about. Fuck 'em.

[y/n] 11:13pm: hi sorry, jungkook was over and we were watching kevin hart's new thing on netflix over some wine and pizza.

[seokjin] 11:15pm: that sounds fun! sorry, i just wanted to check on you but i see you're doing okay lol

[y/n] 11:16pm: i am. :) i'll hang out with you tomorrow

[seokjin] 11:16pm: how sweet, my freeloading baby cousin is coming by

[y/n] 11:17pm: hahahah shut up! although you're not wrong, i am going to steal some food. but most importantly, i do want to hang out and see my bestest oppa <3

[seokjin] 11:18pm: awww y/n, you're so full of shit <3

[seokjin] 11:18pm: go to bed

[y/n] 11:19pm: haha love you tooooo

And so, that's what you did. You got yourself all ready for bed, believing you wouldn't be leaving your house tonight. You pampered yourself, put on a face mask and got yourself all lathered up in lotion just to lay down. You're in Jungkook's shirt that he left behind (and never looked for, so technically it's yours now) when the guys had stayed the night and some Vicky Secret panties.

You're scrolling through your Instagram feed, seeing Jungkook's newly posted story with him and Yoongi already at the bars, acting a damn fool. You laughed at the video he took of Yoongi trying to dance in a tight, awkward space on the crowded dance floor even though he was never the best at dancing. It lowkey made you wish you went out with them so you wouldn't be stuck here thinking about your feelings and how lonely these hours get.

And then you see Jimin's story from an hour ago. He knew you were friends with Yoongi, and although Yoongi wasn't fond of their group too much, he was still an avid party-goer and mingled with people there. You've only spoken to Jimin once because you had to work with him in the same group on a class assignment. You tried to keep it that way though because he was Taehyung's bestfriend. They went everywhere together, did everything together. He, too, was very popular among the ladies and across campus. I guess it was just their thing.

You assume they were at a party cause Jimin quickly flashes the camera at Taehyung, who's in front of him getting a lapdance from some chick. Jimin quickly turns the camera back to his face as he's laughing uncontrollably then abruptly cuts it off.

Great.

She's forsure going home with him tonight.

You set your phone down on the night stand and put on a show on your laptop to help you fall asleep.

Just as you're about to get some shut eye, your phone vibrates. You let it slip at first because you thought it could be one of the guys playing around, but it vibrates again, signaling another text coming through. You pick up your phone just to make sure Yoongi and Jungkook aren't in any trouble and need you to bail their asses out.

[taehyung] 12:17am: hey

[taehyung] 12:20am: come over.

You scoff at how he assumes you're still up and that you'd be coming over. You hated that. He knew he just had your ass.

track two: hit different - sza & ty dolla $ign