#I'll notice mistakes tomorrow probably but whatever

[yazmarina]

in my drafts

for the love circuit series

—that message wasn't for you but paul doesn't mind as long as you don't, either.

paul aron (f2) x gn!social media admin reader

warnings/notes: smut, unprotected sex, lewd photography, office sex, fingering, creampie, accidental nude sending, mild dirty talk

a/n: sorry i disappeared again!!! pls take this as my apology

It was supposed to be just pictures of him during the break. You expected innocent, somewhat average snapshots of how Paul spent his past two months. You knew he took that trip to Italy, attended his sister's graduation, did some training. It was your job to be at least a little updated on the drivers' whereabouts, in case the head of comms needed you to capitalize on it for content.

So when you received a few photos from Paul through iMessage of all his fall whereabouts, you didn't think much of it. You messaged him a few days earlier asking if he could send a few more unreleased pictures that he hadn't posted on his personal account yet, stating that it was for a post you were putting together for the Hitech Instagram. He was delayed in his reply, as usual, but that's something you expected. He was busy, after all.

Perhaps too busy to notice the outlier in the stack of photos displayed in your message thread. Everything seemed to be normal at first; Italian architecture, gym photos, the cheesecake he made. Typical day in the life photos.

And lastly, a photo of him in dim lighting, taken in front of a mirror, with nothing but shadows covering most of his naked body.

You stare at your phone, dumbfounded. Your first instinct is to wait to see if Paul has anything to say, an apology, maybe, or a half-assed excuse. Anything to indicate that he noticed how he sent you a full-on nude. You prepare yourself for the three dots that show he's typing, the frantic scramble to delete the photo from your exchange, but it never comes. Heat rises up your neck as you realize you're going to have to confront him about it. This was, after all, a professional exchange and you'd hate for HR to come knocking at either one of your doors.

-Paul, please review the photos you sent. Thanks.

You regret it as soon as you send it. Was that perhaps too snippy? Too callous? It was as embarrassing for him as it was for you, maybe even more. But come on, how hard is it to distinguish your nudes from your vacation photos?

The loud throb of your heartbeat reverberates in your ears as you wait, cursing under your breath as a full minute passes and then another. You lock your phone, getting up to pace around your room. You're most likely going to see him tomorrow as he'll be at HQ for sim work and other things and you just so happen to have a lineup of meetings at the very same time. You're going to have to face the fact that you'll have to look each other in the eye after you've seen the outline of his dick.

Wonderful.

You unlock your phone, resigning to just delete the photo from your side. You can claim plausible deniability or whatever legal term it is, if it comes down to it.

Just then, Paul starts typing.

You yelp, setting your phone down on the desk harder than intended.

You realize belatedly that you're holding your breath, fingers pressed into your mouth as if suppressing any more potential noises. He stops then starts again then stops, as if he's unsure of what he's typing out.

-I'M SO SORRY!!!! It was an accident I promise 🥹 Don't report me

-Please I'm so sorry it's totally my fault ______ 😭😭😭

-______ please I'm so sorry

Somehow, despite everything, this coaxes a chuckle out of you. Paul was always open and easy around you, and you know he knows you won't report him for an honest mistake. He's probably just red in the face right now, fighting his inner demons.

You type out a reply to ease his nerves.

-I'll just delete it off my phone so no one can say we were fraternizing inappropriately 🥲

The response from Paul is almost instant.

-YES please I'm sorry again

Your finger hovers over the photos when another message comes in.

-Unless you want to save it for a rainy day that's okay too

-I WAS JOKING its a joke I'm sorry I'm sorry

You groan, throwing your head back against the backrest of your office chair.

He's done this on occasion. Flirt. Compliment you on your hair, your outfit (despite it being the team uniform), your smile, even. You brushed it off as typical driver behavior. Nearly all of them had that kind of nerve about them, a confidence that only comes with driving cars that are closer to rockets than actual cars on the street.

Bringing the phone up to your face, you gingerly scroll back up to the photos Paul sent, opening the accursed photo. Your breath hitches as you take it in more carefully, the light cutting sharply between the shadows of whatever hotel room Paul was in. Your eyes trail down and your fingers pinch at the screen, zooming in.

"No! No, no, absolutely not," you admonish yourself, swiping the photo away and typing back a slightly crazed reply.

-Whoever that photo was meant for might not like it if I do

-

"________!"

You freeze on your way out the door from the conference room, Paul's figure jogging toward you from the other end of the hall. The presence of some execs and the head of comms looms from behind you and you quickly shuffle out of the way to let them pass, all of them greeting Paul as he sidles up to you.

"Hi!" You say a little too brightly, turning to Paul, arms coming up mechanically then stopping, your brain reminding you that a hug might be too awkward but standing around without greeting him in some way would be just as weird. A flurry of butterflies erupt in your stomach as Paul stops in front of you, his cologne coming off strong as always. Just the way you liked it.

"How's the meeting?" Paul asks, gesturing to the room. He's bouncing on the balls of his feet, a nervous habit he has that you've observed over the time you've worked with him. He has his hands shoved deep in his jeans, too.

You shrug, forcing out a laugh. "Same old, just going over social media plans and PR."

Paul nods, a little too eagerly perhaps. His eyes shift to the retreating personnel, all of them turning a corner, leaving you and Paul alone in the vicinity.

"Were you waiting for me?" You ask before he can say anything else.

Paul swallows. "Yeah. Look–"

"Paul," you cut him off, raising a hand between the two of you. "It's okay. It's no big deal. Happens to the best of us."

He raises an eyebrow at that. "Have you ever sent a nude to the wrong person before?"

Your cheeks flare up in a violent blush.

"Well, no. And keep your voice down," you berate lightly. Paul looks around and shrugs as if to say, 'Nobody's here'.

You huff, crossing your arms over your chest. "But what I meant was, like, messages are sent to the wrong people all the time, I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, and besides, no one else knows. I promise I haven't told anyo–"

"Okay." It was Paul's turn to cut you off. "Okay, I believe you."

He smiles at you good-naturedly, opening his arms and coaxing you into a hug. It takes you a second, but eventually, you let yourself laugh in relief, wrapping your arms around his strong frame.

"I missed you over the break," Paul admits, pulling away and holding you at arm's length. You blush again, masking it with a chuckle.

"Well, the break isn't over yet. We still have three weeks to go," you remind, your own hands coming up to settle on Paul's outstretched arms, making it look as if you're holding him in place. To anyone who didn't know, you two would look like a couple deep in discussion.

"At least you get to see me more," Paul offers with an easy smile. nudging you lightly.

You scoff. "I think I've seen enough of you, thank you very much."

A heavy silence settles over the two of you as you realize what you just said. Paul lets his arms drop from where they held you, an apology ready at your lips but Paul gets to it first. He runs a hand through his unkempt hair, blonde strands tugged between his fingers.

"You haven't deleted it, have you?"

No, you haven't.

"I was going to, but I got distracted with other things." Not entirely a lie. You really meant to do so, but thoughts you'd rather not share took hold and there were matters you needed to attend to. Matters that could only be solved with your fingers and a vibrator.

You should feel guilty, getting off to a picture of a coworker that wasn't even meant to be sent to you in the first place. Maybe you're terrible, maybe you should be fired, sued by the Aron family.

Memories of you gasping out Paul's name in the quiet of your room come flooding back and you pray that Paul doesn't notice the irregularity in your breathing.

"I'll delete it now, in front of you, so you can see that I did," you offer, fishing your phone out of your pocket.

Paul shakes his head, catching you by the wrist, his hand large and warm against your own skin.

"I mean if I was going to send it to anyone, it would have been you," Paul says lowly, as if afraid someone would hear him, despite the entire expanse of the hallway void of any people other than yourselves.

"Consensually, of course," Paul adds in a hurry, eyes widening. "If you wanted to receive them. It. Receive it."

Your eyebrows shoot up, your mouth curling into a smirk. "You have more you want to send?"

Paul's lower lip slips between his teeth and it seems the two of you are finally on the same page. You try to suppress the smile threatening to break out, clearing your throat and avoiding his eyes.

"Until when are you staying here?" You ask casually. You didn't mean 'here' as HQ. Here as in, in town, close to you.

"Next week," Paul replies, stepping closer. "I won't see you until Qatar after that."

"Shame," you mutter, tilting your head as you meet his gaze once more.

"Maybe," Paul begins, slipping his hand into yours and twining your fingers together. "I can add one more thing to my break to-do list."

"Now?" You ask incredulously. Paul nods immediately.

"You know that one storage closet inside the sim room?" He asks, winking at you.

"What? Paul!" You whisper-shout, but he's already leading you down the hallway. The two of you make a sharp turn to the right where big blocky letters spell out 'SIMULATOR' on the large double doors of the sim room.

You squint, immediately plunged into darkness as the only source of light inside is the curved screen, dimmed as well as it sits on standby.

"What if your engineer walks in? Your teammate? Doesn't he have a session soon?" You continue to protest, even when Paul gently pushes you toward the storage room door at the very corner. He flings the door open and you see that it's filled mostly with spare sim components and monitors.

"Babe, that's why they call it a quickie," Paul reasons, flipping the light switch on inside. The lightbulb offers little respite in the darkness and shadows still play along the lines of Paul's face. He shuts the door behind him.

"It doesn't lock? Paul, I swear–"

You gasp but barely any sound comes out as Paul presses his lips to yours, hands settling on your hips. He maneuvers you toward a shelf, pushing you against it and pressing himself fully on you.

You can feel how hard he is through his jeans.

"Did you like it?" Paul asks as he breaks away for a second. He kisses your jaw, tracing its outline as you sigh, your head falling back. He takes his opportunity to kiss along the column of your neck, his tongue smoothing over your skin.

"Did you get off to it?" Paul asks again and your breath catches in your throat. It's as if he knew all the dirty, deplorable things you did over that one picture.

"I know you did," Paul concludes with a breathy laugh, reclaiming your lips and driving a knee between your legs. You groan in response, grinding against his thigh while your fingers tug at his belt.

Paul pulls away and takes over for you, undoing his jeans and slipping them down to his knees. You silently thank whatever god is listening for the fact that you so conveniently decided to wear those easy cotton office pants, slipping them off in one quick swoop along with your underwear.

"I'm tempted to get on my knees right now so I can eat you out," Paul teases, hiking your shirt up and exposing your chest.

A snide remark forms in your brain but it's cut off when you feel the cold press of fingers on your clit. You clamp a hand down on your mouth as Paul gently flicks at it, feeling yourself getting wetter by the second.

"Maybe later after work," Paul says, rubbing harder. Your elbow spasms at the sensation, hitting the shelf behind you.

"Ow, fuck," you curse, meeting Paul's eyes. You two burst into muffled laughter just as Paul slips a finger in.

"What happened to a quickie?" You demand, hips moving along with Paul's hand. He adds a second finger and you whine, fingers digging into Paul's shoulders.

"I have manners," Paul informs with an easy smile, face impossibly close to yours. You can see the shift in his bright blue eyes. "I need you wet and ready for me, no?"

You bite down on your lip, eyes rolling into the back of your head as Paul curls his fingers inside you. A shiver runs through you and you feel yourself clenching down and around his digits.

Paul retracts his hand, much to your dismay, but you don't get to complain before Paul kisses you again, rough and heated. His tongue dances against yours and you grip at his Hitech team kit for purchase.

"Bend over," Paul commands and you're more than happy to oblige, turning around to do just that.

You brace yourself against the shelf behind you, gripping at the wood as you lower the front of your body. Paul grabs your hips and your back arches almost automatically. You can feel him pressing up against you and you sneak a peek behind you to see Paul with his phone in hand.

"So I can 'accidentally' send you another one," Paul jests before slowly sinking in. You whine, head dropping down between your shoulders. The thought of him documenting your little tryst sends a shiver up your spine which only intensifies as Paul grabs one side of your hips. He sets up a hard, steady pace that has the shelf in front of you creaking.

"Paul," you gasp out, your whole body shuddering at the force of how hard he's fucking you.

Both of his hands grip at your sides now so you can assume his phone has been put away. You try to stay upright which proves challenging considering Paul is ramming into you ferociously.

Contradictory to it all, you feel the soft touch of fingers through your scalp, smoothing over your hair. In a moment's turn, your head is yanked back as Paul tugs at your hair, arching your back even more.

A garbled sound escapes you, part moan, part sob as the sting in your scalp shoots straight down to your core, pushing you ever so closer to your release.

"The social media person," Paul begins through gritted teeth. "Always so pretty behind the camera. Making me do trend after trend. I'd do anything for you, baby."

You mewl in response, reaching back to grip at Paul's wrist, pushing back against him, urging him to go faster. Paul gets the memo.

"Funny how that photo was taken only because I was about to jack off to the thought of you," Paul continues. "You sent me a message and I was missing that pretty face of yours so I went through your Instagram. Looks like you had fun in Mallorca, tiny swimsuit and all."

"Sorry, baby," Paul says close to your ear. "Couldn't help it."

"Inside," you plead. "P-Please, I'm close. N-Need you to cum inside me."

Paul merely grunts, letting go of your hair so he can pull you flush against him. His thrusts grow erratic, barely pulling out of you each time. He pulls you back to him, your back against his front as he bites down on your shoulder.

"Yes, yes, right there." Your voice comes out raspy, walls squeezing around Paul's throbbing cock. He reaches over and resumes his movements from a while ago on your clit and you yelp, hips spasming pathetically.

You cum with Paul deep inside you, his groans filling your ear as he follows soon after. He stills and pulls you even closer to him, arms encircling your torso. He kisses the spot where he had bitten you, pressing his lips almost reverently to the indented skin.

You're both breathing hard and you're perfectly content to stand around while the two of you gather your bearings. But Paul momentarily disentangles himself from you and reaches down. You see him pull his phone out from his jeans from where they've presumably fallen down to his ankles.

"Smile," Paul prompts, his lips planting a soft kiss behind your ear as he angles the camera toward the two of you.

He snaps a blurry photo, just in time to capture your hand coming up to rest against his cheek as he grins into your skin. Emboldened by the somewhat artsy, flirtatious nature of the photo, you turn around and land a proper kiss on Paul's lips, savoring each second his tongue passes over your mouth.

"Send all the photos you want," you whisper, smiling up at him.

"Or we could just take them together," Paul offers, kissing the tip of your nose.

[rapturousrendezvous]

++---Next Door---++ Toji x Reader (femme presenting/she/her) Explicit Tags: Single father Toji, Reader is Single Mother/Neighbor, Spontaneous sex, semi-soft to hard cock oral, cunnilingus, rough fucking, teasing, finger and tongue play, creampie, messy, mentions of "husband stitch", vaginal penetration, mention of feeder/eater kink Words: 3090K Inspiration from fanart by artist Yunonoai (on twt)

Again? At this time of night…

You hear loud banging on your bedroom wall and an intense moan that could probably wake the entire complex floor. It had been like this for a week since you moved in, and you were more than willing to mind your business. If it wasn't for the fact that you had a sleeping toddler in the next room that was extremely fussy and that you hadn't slept well. 

You get up, not caring that you're only wearing an oversized T-shirt and underwear, hair tied into a scarf, as you make your way to the neighbor to the left of you. Taking a deep breath, you knock, waiting a few moments before you attempt again, only for the door to swing open, and your fist hits the rock-hard barrier that was your neighbor's chest. 

Looking up, you retreat your hand, seeing that the much larger and taller man with mid-length dark hair and green eyes was utterly naked, a look of irritation clear on his face with an arm leaning on the side of the door frame. 

"Yeah, what?" He gruffly states, almost spitting in your direction and scratching behind his ear. 

"I, uh," You made the mistake of looking down. Your eyes met with a soft shaft, still slick with whatever juices covered it. 

"If you wanna fuck, come back tomorrow. I'm busy." 

Offended by his attitude, you snap. 

"That's my problem. You're too loud, disturbing me and my kid's sleep. Keep it down." 

Another neighbor opens their door, glaring at the two of you until they notice the naked man and suddenly shut their door without a word. He smirks and looks down at you, and shrugs. 

"Whatever, lady." 

Before you can protest, he shuts the door in your face. Typically, you'd knock again and demand he actually address the issue. But it was 3 am, and you only had two good hours of sleep left before you had to wake up and prepare for the day ahead. 

I'll deal with him later. 

Those two hours went by fast, though they were quiet. As you finished getting your kid dressed and ready, you gathered all your things and headed out the door. Thankfully you made it to the daycare center down the street on time, handing the caretaker the lunchbox and other items before kissing your little one on the forehead. 

As you stand, you turn to see the same face that was only hours ago, giving you a death glare. Strapped to his chest was a small dark-haired child looking around in curiosity. The caretaker shoves you out of the way, beaming and kissing up the man as she pinched the cheeks of his child. 

You roll your eyes and gather your own things, barely noticing that he is staring in your direction. This doesn't bother you in the slightest. Even so, it intrigues you to know why he's staring. Once you pass him, you put a stride in your step, swaying your hips confidently with your head held high. You notice in the reflection of the glass door that he's completely turned his head to watch you leave, and it satisfies you for the moment. Though, you weren't sure why you cared. 

It was hard to shake the neighbor from your mind during work, significantly… his size. If that's how he was soft, you could only imagine what he was like in full action. 

Kudos to whoever was taking that. 

You try your best to focus, but it becomes increasingly difficult with the day dragging on. Once lunch comes around, you nearly sprint from your desk, going to the break room to retrieve your food. Frustration hits you immediately when you open the fridge, seeing that someone has stolen your lunch…the second time this week. 

What the fuck? I swear…

You look in your wallet, sighing at the few dollars and coins you had that weren't enough for anything except a soda from the vending machine. You would have to go back to your apartment and eat there. 

It was a short walk, a good 15 minutes, which was on purpose for the choice of living at the specific complex. It meant you only had 30 minutes instead of an entire hour to eat. 

Back at your front door, you fumbled in your purse to get your key, only to realize…you had left them on your desk. 

Today is just not my fucking day… 

Defeated, you slump against the door, not paying attention to the large hand reaching over to tap your shoulder. 

"Yo, ya locked out or something?" 

You look up, startled to see your neighbor standing next to you, a look of amusement on his face. 

"No. I left my keys at work." 

He laughs, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. 

"Just as you deserve, bothering me last night." 

You narrow your eyes, fed up with his smug grin. Before you can say anything, he sighs and looks away. 

"You clean up nice. That offer still stands." 

Confused, you tilt your head. "What?" 

"If you wanna fuck, remember?" 

He, in fact, did say that so casually, but you only figured he was joking or being obtuse due to being interrupted. You look at your phone, annoyed that you still had 20 minutes before you had to return to work, but without your key, there was no point in standing in the hallway entertaining this man's lifestyle choices. 

"Yeah, you wish; I have more important things to do." 

He shrugs and points to your door. "Right, like getting locked out of your apartment." 

"Look, I was only trying to enjoy my lunch break." 

"Come to my place then. I have leftovers." 

Your stomach betrays you, growling before you can even decline the invite. 

"Fine. But I'll be quick." 

You enter his apartment, surprised by how clean and minimalist it appears. Even the toys neatly tucked into the corner made your place look like a mess. He had to of had someone helping him. 

"Chicken, vegetable, or beef?" He asks, sliding over take-out cartons toward you. You make your selection as he grabs it and tosses the contents on the stove in a frying pan. After a few moments, he holds a stray plate from the drying rack and slides the food onto it. 

"Here." 

You look at it in awe, picking up the chopsticks and tasting it. It was alright, especially for reheated takeout. You eat a reasonable amount, pushing the plate away and bowing. 

"Thanks for the meal." You look up, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not sorry for bothering you last night. You do need to keep it down." 

He smirks. "Why…jealous?" 

"You know what, never mind. I'm leaving." 

"Sure, whatever. You owe me for the food, by the way." 

You watch a grin spread across his face as he crosses his arms. 

"How much?" You ask with annoyance, half expecting he'd pull this on you in the first place. 

His fingers point down, your eyes following down to the semi-bulge that protruded from his sweats. 

"What? You…seriously?" 

"I have a thing for watching women eat what I make. Those lips of yours look soft too." 

The compliment inflates your ego, but you look at your watch and realize the time. Plus, it was a high assumption that a  girlfriend made all that noise last night. 

"I can pay you. How long-uh? I mean, how much?" 

"9 inches, soft. You tell me how big, hard." He smirks at you again, mocking your slip-up. 

" I don't have time for this." 

"I saw you at the daycare, making me watch you leave." He walks up to you, grabbing your chin from across the counter to look up at him. 

"Think I wasn't gonna watch that sweet ass of yours? I can see why someone wanted to put a baby in you." 

Your cheeks heat up, your words coming out in stammers. As much as you couldn't help but admit, you were trying to get attention but only to be petty, not to entice. It worked too good, and this man was hooked. If you weren't going to be late going back to work, and the possibility of his partner walking in, you would take a chance in seeing that giant cock of his again. 

"It's now or never, sweetheart." 

You frown, correcting him by saying your name. He leans down and takes your lips in a deep, sloppy kiss, biting your lips as he pulls back. 

"Y/N, huh? Just to hear your sharp tongue scream my name, call me Toji."

Fuck. I'm already late headed back. What do I do…

The temptation was eating away at you. Leaving now would only be a waste of returning late from your break. And it wasn't like you were late all the time. 

You inhale and exhale slowly, meeting eyes with Toji. Your focus draws to the scar on the corner of his lips, and he notices, using a thumb to trail around your mouth. 

"So, I take it you're staying." 

You pull your face away and go over to the other side of the kitchen island. There was no need to get comfortable or set the scene. You just wanted to finish this and return to your job. 

He smirks, leaning against the sink, watching you untie the drawstring of his sweats and pull down on the waistband revealing his twitching swollen cock, the tip of him peeking from the foreskin. What surprised you is that he wasn't even hard, your hand grasping his shaft to bring it to your lips. A musky, earthy smell also hits you as your head comes closer. Judging by the cleanliness of his apartment, you could only assume he showered regularly, and this was his natural scent. 

He gives you no time to think further about it, grabbing the back of your head and shoving himself right into your cheek. Your mouth opens to allow him access, your tongue trailing up and waiting for some witty retort or sarcastic teasing. But it's only the sound of a short grunt, followed low hum as he grips your hair. 

You continue trying to take as much of him in your mouth as possible, realizing just how thick he is toward the middle compared to the tapered mushroom head. You manage, though it appears he's grown harder, adding an inch that pressed against the back of your throat. 

So a shower and a grower? This isn't fair…

You gag, which makes him groan louder, eagerly pushing your head even more until he's touching past your tonsils. You were officially halfway down his cock (now fully erect), having to breathe through your nose and hold on to his hips to brace yourself. 

"I knew it. That pretty mouth of yours is taking my dick so well..now sit still." 

You do so, keeping your eyes locked with his gaze as his hips move forward at an even pace. With each stroke, he pushes further into your throat, grunting and breathing heavily as his grip tightens on your hair. He stops and grits his teeth when you begin to mimic those same movements, your head bobbing and your tongue trailing the underside of his shaft. You feel the slight tug of his foreskin slides against your cheeks, the look of pleasure forming on his face as he bites his lip. 

"Fuck…." 

You'd smirk if your mouth wasn't so full. Suddenly, Toji stops you, pulling himself from your mouth and hoisting you onto the kitchen island in one movement. He tears away your pantyhose and slides up your dress, roughly shoving you back as he pulls down your panties to your ankles. Without giving you any chance to speak, his head dives between your thighs, and you feel his wide, wet tongue press against your clit. You cover your mouth, but you feel him snatch your arm down. 

"Nuh uh, none of that shit." 

He presses his tongue against you again, trailing it to dip into your heat. You mewl and squirm, hands held down by his own so you can be heard. He pauses to inhale your scent, laughing loudly as he growls with heavy-lidded eyes. 

"Your pussy smells just as good as it tastes, Y/N." 

You look down at him, half concerned at the compliment but too aroused to comment. He smirks and surrounds the sensitive flesh with his mouth, licking and sucking relentlessly to make you cry out. Toji pulls back, staring at your hole covered in his salvia. Taking two fingers, he slides them into you, humming with satisfaction. 

"As I thought, you…are tight as hell. The doc must have stitched you up good." 

It took you a moment to realize that he was referring to the infamous "husband stitch" doctors made if they had to cut you during childbirth. That he was betting on that being a possibility was typical. You didn't even know this man for a day, and he was so transparent in his tastes, not that he bothered hiding it from you. 

To hell with it; as long as I get off…this will be worth it. 

He pulls out his fingers, putting them to his mouth and using his other hand to push you down. 

"Open 'em." 

Your legs part, but he pulls them further as he positions himself at your entrance. He was tall enough to make this position work, which impresses you. Your body flinches when he smacks the tip of himself against your clit, pushing down to your hole before roughly thrusting up into your wet cunt. He groans loudly when you scream from the stretch, your walls clinging around him with a snug fit. He'd been right about you being tight, but he was also thicker than most toys You've used during your intimate time. 

He doesn't pause, immediately thrusting into you quickly, causing your entire body to jiggle and shake with each stroke. He lifts your leg onto his shoulder, allowing him to enter you deeper, though he bottoms out only a fourth of his cock left. 

"God damn, I'm about to cum already…shit." 

He presses a thumb against your clit, rolling it clockwise as he slams into you. He was so hard and thick that you could feel him possibly push around other organs in the area, even press against your cervix with rough taps. The sound of skin slapping and the smell of sex fills the room. The kitchen counter is covered with juices and arousal. Your head becomes dizzy with pleasure, the haze coming over you as your eyes roll in the back of your head. He watches you, panting and grunting. 

"That's it…come on fucking say it…" 

At the peak of your climax, you scream his name, clear fluid spilling out of you as your walls tighten around him to indicate your orgasm. His cock twitches and swells before shooting out thick ropes of cum deep into your pussy, as he leans to growl in your ear. 

The two of you breathe heavily, stuck in the aftermath of your pleasure for a few moments. Finally, Toji pulls out, leaving you a mess of cum and other fluids that spill onto the counter. 

"Damn…it's been a minute since I've come like that. You're a fucking mess." 

It takes a few more seconds to process, looking down at what he was talking about and realizing just how much shit you were in. One, you noticed none of you bothered to use a condom (thankfully, you were on the pill), and second, the time on the clock showed you were more than an hour late coming back from your break. 

"Oh fuck me, I can't return to work like this!" You try to stand on your feet, but your knees give out, having to brace yourself on the counter. You flash an angry glare at Toji, who chuckles at the sight of your distress. 

"You can't even walk, Y/N. Need me to carry you?" 

You didn't have any patience left to deal with his teasing. You could only wobble your way to your bag and pull out your phone, seeing a missed call from your co-worker. Quickly calling back, you give an excuse that there was an emergency during your break and you'd be back shortly. The good news was that your boss had to step out, so I didn't notice you were gone for so long. 

You hang up the phone looking back at Toji, who is still smugly watching you. 

"Leaving?" 

"Yes. I am. If you wanted a second round.." 

He looks down casually at his hands before looking back at you. 

"Nah, I'm good. But…" 

He saunters over to his bathroom door, giving you a wink. 

"Might wanna wash the smell of my dick off before you go." 

After a quick shower, you inspect your dress to ensure nothing gets on it. Your pantyhose was ruined, and you couldn't find your panties. You decide to just slip back in your bra and dress, slipping in your heels, not bothering to say a word to your neighbor that just fucked the life of you. 

The rest of the work went by fast, thankfully so. After picking up your kid, you both head home and catch Toji speaking to a woman who looks indifferent to your presence in the hallway. 

That must be his girlfriend…

You go to your door, ignoring the two until he calls you. You turn, seeing that the other woman has left. 

"Hey, you left something at my place." 

To your horror, he holds up the panties you assumed you lost. You snatch them quickly. 

"Are you insane? Wasn't your girlfriend just here speaking with you?" 

"Her? That's my ex-wife. We were just talking about our son. Her turn to pick him up from daycare." 

You stand in silence, annoyed more than ever that he even answered you truthfully. You open the door, allowing the toddler to run in and laugh happily as you stand in the hallway. 

"What? Need something else?" He asks with a cocky tone to his voice. 

"No." You turn your head, but he reaches out to grab your jaw and turn it back, giving you a quick kiss with a sly grin. 

"Bring that sweet, tight pussy over any time." 

He lets you go, humming to himself while he shuts his door. You stand speechless in the hallway, taking a moment before shaking yourself back to reality. 

This man is going to be trouble…

[polaroidbills]

GET'CHA HEAD IN THE GAME

˚✧₊ ( 🏀 📕 ) sim jake - an imagine

genre/cw: jake x fem!reader, angsty, fluffy, basketball player x nerd(?), kissing, forbidden love(ish)

word count: 3052

synopsis: jake sim is the captain of the basketbal team, but he needs some help with his grades. he decides to ask a random girl at a party, who's reading a book, to be his tutor. they start to fall for each other, but what happens when their friends want them to stick to the status quo?

—> mega inspired by high school musical 1 (jake as troy and y/n as gabriella!)

cameos: yeonjun (txt), beomgyu, (txt), and taehyun (txt)

a/n: i thought of this idea at like 1am. and it's a bit rushed but whatever. enjoy!

now playing... start of something new - hsm

i walk into the house party, with the slight smell of alcohol filling my nose. i find the first empty spot on a secluded couch and start reading.

parties were never really my thing. but my mom forced me to go, since i never go out. she thought it would be nice for me to get to know the people in the neighborhood more, since i just moved here.

music blares into my ear drums as i read.

"really? you're reading at a party like this?" i am interrupted.

"well i guess," i say still keeping my eyes on the book.

i feel the couch dip on my rightside and i turn to see a cute guy sitting next to me.

"i'm jake," he puts his hand right in front of the page to shake it.

i sigh and close the book as he leaves me no choice, "y/n."

"i don't think i've seen you around? are you new?"

"yeah i just moved here a week ago."

"ohh cool cool. so you're into that learning and reading stuff right?"

"uh yeah i guess. my grades are good soo."

"great, 'cause i actually need a tutor.. i'm the captain of the basketball team and i won't be able to continue if my grades keep going down. could you help me?"

of course he chooses a party to pick out the one girl who's reading a book to be his tutor.

"um sure? i guess? that would look good on my resumes."

"great! so i'll see you around? what's your num-"

"yo jake!" a shout from across the room is heard, "c'mere!"

"sorry gotta go! i'll see you in school though right?"

"yeah! uh-" and he's gone. just like that.

i guess i tutor now?

well, tomorrow's my first day anyway.

march 27, 2021 was my first day on junior year in a completely different school. everything was different. i was in a different country, city, timezone, and environment.

my first day went by smoothly. i got to know the school a lot and observed the cliques and groups. no one really noticed me, which didn't bother me at all. i liked being invisible sometimes. i have no worries and no drama.

i sit myself down at a table in the cafeteria and start eating, yet again, opening up my book.

i them feel a sort of presence by my side. i look up and low and behold, jake sim.

from what i've heard, jake sim is the captain of the basketball team, and the son of the coach. pretty much the most popular guy in school, and probably the most good-looking. his number is 16.

"hey," he says sitting down, "whatcha reading?"

"normal people by sally rooney. it's my favourite."

"oh cool cool. um so listen, we could have our first tutor session at free period today? in the library?"

i close my book and look at him, finally getting a good look at his face. he's cute.

"uh sure. i wasn't expecting it to be today but yeah, i'll meet you in the library at free period."

"okay great! oh and could i get your number so just in case something happens?"

"sure!" we exchange numbers and he walks away, going back to his friends, and i go back to my book.

my math class was good too. i was busy copying down notes and equations my teacher was writing down. but i noticed a mistake.

"shouldn't it be x=7? and not x=1?" it appears i sid it out loud a little to loudly.

"i'm sorry? did you have something to say y/n?" my teacher asks.

"uh shouldn't it be x=7?" i ask once again.

"that would be quite literally impossible-" she checks on her calculator, "i stand corrected!"

after class, a girl approaches me.

"hey would you like the join the scholastics decathlon? we have a championship coming up and you would be perfect for our team! i'm minji by the way!"

"oh um sure! i've been trying to get involved a little more and doing things out of my box, so why not?"

"great!"

i am now committed to being a tutor and a scholastic decathlon member. i wonder what's next?

the day zooms by and now it's free period.

i grab my books and head off to the library, where i sit and wait for jake to arrive.

i wait and wait for him. where is he? it's been almost half an hour since we were supposed to start and i'm growing impatient.

i start packing up my things, thinking i've been punked and stood up and that he won't show up. but before i can, a boy comes running down the library and in front of me.

"i'm- sorry i'm- late i- had to avoid- sunghoon 'cause he wanted- to play ball," obviously out of breath jake explains himsef as he sits down.

"well let's get started!" i hurriedly get straight into it, not wanting to waste time.

"and don't forget that x is the variable not just a random letter."

"woah it makes soo much more sense now!"

i finish the lesson up smoothly after about an hour.

"thank you so much! i really appreciate this! tomorrow again?"

"yeah sure! and i can check your homework answers then!"

we close our books and grab our things, leaving the library.

its been about two weeks since i've been tutoring jake. and he's made a lot of progress. we've aso been getting a lot closer. we're friends now.

i ended up telling minji about it and she gave me mixed feelings. she told me that the scholastic decathlon is in two weeks and i need to focus on it, and not on jake. i didn't know how to respond, i just nodded and walked away.

(jake's pov)

i have another tutor session today with y/n. and its been heping a lot. i got an a in my math class, and a b in english.

we're also a lot closer than before. we've even hung out outside of school and tutoring. like to a coffee shop or something. i'm starting to really like her i think. i mean she's pretty, smart, kind, and soo helpful. i don't know if she feels the same though.

i leave for the library. and as i open the door, sunghoon steps in front of me.

"so you've been ditching playing ball during free period to go to the library? really? basketball during free period is our thing."

"i'm sorry. it's just if i keep my bad grades, i won't be able to play basketball. so i need to study-"

"jake!" y/n waves to me and sunghoon turns to see who it is. i return the wave and continue the conversation with sunghoon.

"who's that? isn't that the new girl?"

"oh uh yeah. she's been tutoring me- and it's really helping."

"you've been ditching me to study with her?"

"uh yeah i guess. she's really smart and helpful and i think i'm starting to like her."

"look- i gotta go, but all i have to say is to stick to basketball. don't go dating a nerd and start being all book wormy. and don't forget the championship game is in two weeks."

as he walks away, i'm left speechless.

stick to basketball? i'm just trying to get my grades up, right? or is he right? am i just using these sessions to get closer to y/n?

i shake my head, shoo away those thoughts, and make my way to y/n.

(y/n's pov)

i see jake finish his conversation and make his way to me.

"look! i brought snacks this time!"

"oh cool."

"you seem down, is something up?" i notice his slouchy posture and low voice.

"no it's nothing."

"you sure? you know you can tell me anything right?"

"yeah i just really don't wanna talk about it right now."

"oh that's okay. hmm i think i have something that can cheer you up! come with me!" i grab his wrist and run to the school gym.

when i grab his wrist, electricity shoots through me. i really like him. i can't explain it. the way his hair flows, his honey-like smile, and the way he csn make me laugh no matter what. i'm in love.

"the gym?"

"yeah! we're gonna play some basketball!" i grab a ball from the rack.

"really? you know how to play?" he walks to me.

"well- no. not exactly." i shoot the ball, but it completely air balls and misses the basket.

"i'll teach you."

jake walks closer to me and shows how to position myself to shoot.

"bend your knees and elbows and jump. don't forget to follow through with your other hand."

i follow his steps and attempt to shoot, but again it completely misses. laughing it off, i grab the ball to try again.

"here- could i touch you?" he gestures to my elbow and hands.

i keep my eyes on the ball, not daring to look him in the eye. it's too dangerous.

"this like this," he moves my elbow more, so it's bent. "andd your hand over here," he places my hand on the side of the ball.

my heart is racing. he's never been this close.

"and shoot!" i throw the ball and it actually makes it into the net. swish!

"ah! i did it! it went in!" i gasp turning to jake jumping into the air.

the surprised look on his face is so cute.

"look at us! we help each other!" i say and peck him on the cheek.

i turn around to shoot again. but i feel a hand on my wrist.

jake grabs my wrist and turns me back to him. i'm struck and can't move. he comes closer to me. even closer than before. i drop the ball as he closes the space and puts his lips on mine.

we're kissing. i didn't know he felt this way too.

the kiss is slowly and lovely. but he pulls apart to breath.

i stare into his eyes.

"y/n i really like you. like really really like you. you're all i think about."

i'm speechless at the sudden confession. but i'm glad to hear how he feels.

"and you might not-"

"i really like you too!" i interrupt him. his eyes instantly light up. and he starts to smile.

"really?"

"yes. i've been waiting for you to make a move."

"well i'm making it now. will you be my girlfriend?"

"yes."

a week had gone by of me and jake dating. i can't believe it's real. we're together. like for real.

i've never been happier.

(sunghoon's pov)

i walk over to mingi, y/n's best friend to come up with a plan.

"look i have a plan, and i hope it works."

we wait for jake in the locker room before practice. we created a presentation for him.

he walks in and we start.

"choi yeonjun! class of '99 captain, championship mvp, and legend! also known as ace!" i start off.

"choi beomgyu! class of '01 captain and championship mvp! also known as baller beom!" jay continues.

"kang taehyun! class of '02 captain and championship mvp! also known as lightning!" heeseung adds.

"no one of which were involved in books and studying. they won these games because they kept their eyes on the prize and didn't get distracted with books days before the championship game."

"get your head in the game!"

"look guys if you don't think i'll give it my 110% into this game, then you don't know me," we start setting up the camera.

"but we just thought-"

"no here's what i thought. i thought we were a team, i thought we were friends. we lose and win together."

"but then the girl and the studying."

"dude i'm for the team! i've always been for the team!"

(y/n's pov)

i am sat down by minji.

"in a world full of poverty and inequality, a game of basketball plays. though it's entertaining and fun, it provides nothing for this world! thats is the world of jake sim. rather than genorousity and change, he has slam dunks and fouls! unlike oprah winfrey and eleanor roosevelt. that is the inevitable world of jake sim."

"um i have a tutor session soon. i should really go."

"y/n! pay attention."

"dude i'm for the team! i've always been for the team!" the screen plays. i turn to the screen which shows jake.

"and the girl is just someone i met! alright? and the studying is nothing, it means nothing to me! it's probably just a way to ease my nerves and distract me! i don't know. but you're my guys and my team. y/n means nothing to me! i'll forget about her and the studying! are you happy now?"

suddenly it feels as if my heart has been shattered and stomped on like glass.

this is how jake really feels. it all meant nothing.

"this is the real world of jake sim."

tears starts filling up into my eyes. as they flow i realize how jake just used me for grades.

i walk out of the room not wanting to be there any longer.

a few minutes later i reach my locker to grab mu things and leave.

"hey! what's up?" jake comes up beside me but i ignore. "there's something i wanna talk about with you."

"yeah about how i meant nothing to you and that i'm just some girl you met? and how you can just forget about me?"

"y/n-"

"i really liked you jake. how could you?" i walk away as tears form in my eyes once again.

"y/n?"

the doorbell is heard and my mom answers the door. i walk halfway down the stairs.

"hi mrs. y/l/n, i'm jake."

"ohh so you're jake," i gesture to my mom to not let him in or tell him i'm here.

"is y/n here?"

"oh um sorry she isn't here right now."

"oh. that's okay, thanks though," he walks away and i go back upstairs.

the next few days go by and now the scholastic decathlon is in two days.

i've been doing everything in my power to avoid jake. in the cafeteria i sit at a different table. and i turn the other way if i see him, completely disregarding him.

minji could clearly see how hurt i was, i couldn't even focus on studying or reading. i just spaced out, and ignored everyone.

jake has tried to talk to me multiple times, but seeing that i wasn't going to talk to him, he stopped trying.

"y/n! the decathlon is in two days! pay attention!"

"i'm sorry it's just- my mind is in a different place."

"look y/n. i have something to tell you," minji sits.

"we knew sunghoon could make jake say things like that. we planned it all. we thought what jake would say would keep your mind focused on the decathlon. but it seems to have done the opposite."

"you planned it all?"

"yes. sunghoon made jake say those things."

"no one made jake say anything. be said those things himself."

(jake's pov)

what have i done? she completely ignores me and avoids me every chance she gets.

words can't explain how empty and bad i feel.

sunghoon see it too. i keep missing simple lay-ups or space out in the middle of practice. clearly not keeping my head in the game.

i don't know what to do.

"jake! pass the ball!"

"oh sorry-"

"dude the championship game is in two days."

"sorry man. my mind keeps getting distracted. i don't even know what i did."

"i know."

"what?"

"our team and the scholastic decathlon team made a plan to keep your guys' heads focused. but it didn't work. i made you say those things in the locker room and we live streaming it onto minji's computer. y/n was watching and heard what you said. we thought it would help you not get distracted."

"you did what?" i run out of the gym, in a hurry to y/n's house. i wasn't planning on doing this today, but it's now or never.

(y/n's pov)

my phone rings.

jake <3

i decide to pick it up this time.

"hello?"

"y/n. i'm sorry. i know you might not forgive me but please. i could never forget about you. you've been on my mind 24/7. i can't even focus during practice. my life without you is a misery. please come back."

"jake i don't know- you said i meant nothing."

"i know i did. and no excuse could make up for it. but just know that i love you. i love you so much. please."

"jake-"

"i got you something before you say anything else."

"jake what?"

"turn around."

i turn around to the window and there stands jake on my balcony. a surprised smile plays on my face. i walk over to open the door and hang up the phone.

"what're you doing here?"

"i got you this," he hands me a book.

"no way. you did not. A SIGNED COPY?! oh my god! thank you!!" i impulsively pull him into a hug, not thinking. "oh sorry," i awkwardly laugh.

"no no it's okay. i liked it, " he smiles.

"look y/n. i'm so sorry. words couldn't describe it so i thought i could give you this instead. open the pages."

i open the book. "oh. my. god. jake." i'm in awe.

"you annotated it? thats so sweet! thank you! yes i forgive you."

"yes!" he jumps up and down cutely in celebration. "thankyou thankyou thankyou! look i even wrote down a playlist for you in the book, so you can listen while you read or just whenever! anddd just in case you didn't dorgive me now, i wrote down an extra apology on the last page!"

i laugh at his rapid words.

"and i-" i steal his lips for a second to kiss him. and he's left speechless.

"i-" he pulls me in another time to put his lips on mine. and we pull away.

"i love you y/n."

"i love you too jake."

@polaroidbills please DO NOT copy, plagiarize, or repost any of my work.

[vynegar]

Rosa's debates with herself

Transcribed my screenshots from the Snowfallen Secrets event, where Rosa was debating herself. This is not exhaustive, but probably has most of the lines/arguments.

Opponent: You. Case descriptions (from less to more challenging):

My professional standard is to work with sincerity and always take responsibility!

My work ethic is to not leave a single loophole!

My life motto is to finish and get off work on time!

The goal I'm working towards is to always partake in challenges regardless of their difficulty!

To prevent mental blindspots, constant introspection is a must!

[Note: The last one is the only one which uses the silhouette of her trial attire (the gray suit with ponytail) instead of her everyday clothes (the red blouse with her hair down), and the only boss to have an attribute, empathy, in the description]

Lines spoken by the opponent (shadow Rosa); lines preceded by an arrow (->) are rebuttals from Rosa/the player

The fun you had slacking off will be paid for in your suffering!

Stop getting distracted!

Don't slack off. Carefully check every place.

Heh heh, have you finished the case report?

You've been given this work out of trust. Are you worthy of it?

Your work determines the fate of others! Be cautious!

It's nearly time for the monthly assessment. Are you confident?

Are you sure all the clues have been properly sorted out?

Your mistakes could cause trouble for your colleagues!

What's the point of trying so hard? Why not just lie down and slack off?

-> I'll keep advancing and become a better version of myself!

Your work is vitally important. You can't cut corners!

I believe you can do it!

It's so hard. Let's call it a day!

-> I'll always work hard and won't let myself down!

You need a change of perspective. You're beating a dead horse!

No one's gonna notice if I slack off every now and then!

No extra pay, even for such good work!

If I can't finish it today, I'll just leave it for tomorrow!

Don't you think you're a bit too complacent!?

Have you forgotten your dreams?

Keep it up! You can definitely do it!

Do you really think that you're fine like this?

The work was delayed because you were being sloppy! Reflect on that!

Did you do the exam practice questions? Don't tell me you forgot!

What's the point of trying so hard? Nobody cares!

A new challenge has appeared. Are you still planning to do nothing?

If you don't pay attention, opportunities will slip past!

You've come this far. You can't just do whatever you like anymore.

You've got to keep giving your all! Don't stop advancing!

Confucius said, "Self-reflection thrice daily." Have you done yours!?

Your work is extremely important. You can't be too careful!

No matter how hard you work, evil will never be fully uprooted!

Are you just taking it for granted?

Are you own subjective emotions influencing your decisions?

Do you really think it's fair and just this way?

Your idea of persistence is a joke!

Have you really considered it from all angles?

Are you taking too much for granted? Is this really fair and just?

Everything you've done has been useless. There are still plenty of people breaking the law!

Have you really thought about it from all possible angles?

The way you view things is too naive!

You're way too trusting of other people's opinions!

Things aren't as simple as you'd like to think!

You're merely insisting on your own idea of justice!

You're just whinging about nothing from a moral high ground!

Do you want to become a partner of justice too?

Your ideas are a complete fantasy!

You'll get what you deserve for being so stubborn.

What you're doing right now is all meaningless!

[charles-simmons-fanfiction]

Opposites do attract, right? - Steven Meeks / Reader

Summary: Meeks is helping you study for a Electricity test and you hadn't quite realized how much of a nerd he can be - and how charming that is. [700 words, fluff]

Or, me finding a way to infodump about this subject bc I'll have a test on it soon

🧡🧡.

"Okay, this makes no sense," you were starting to consider just giving up at this point.

"It's really not that hard. Let's try again," Meeks insisted, looking for a pencil.

You groaned and sat up again. The exam was tomorrow and you just couldn't make any sense of whatever you were learning at Electricity. Your current tiredness was not making it any easier, even though it was completely your fault for how late you went to slep yesterday.

"This big circle here is the Source Charge, which is what makes the Eletric field. Its direction depends solely on if it's positive or negative," he drew two circles. A negative one with arrows pointing away from it, and a positive one with arrows pointing at it. "Now the small circle here is the Test Charge."

You did your best to focus on it, now feeling embarrassed at how stupid you must be looking. "He's having to literally draw it for me," you thought and kind of wished to have never asked for help to begin with.

"Now, the Test Charge can be attracted or repulsed by the Source Charge, and that's Eletric Force."

"Is that the opposites attract thing?" You interrupt. "If the charges are opposite, they attract."

He smiled brightly. "Exactly!" His loud tone caught you off guard and he immediately went back to explaining, messily drawing on the last page of his notebook.

As he spoke, you couldn't help but notice the sparkle in his eyes, even through the glasses. Meeks was ranting way too quickly, clearly excited. You were barely catching up, yet you felt a little more awake now.

"With this formula here, you can easily find the Electric Potential at point B, where the Test Charge is. What we need to know, though, is the Voltage. Also known as the difference between two points of Electric Potential," he handed her the notebook. "Solve this one yourself!"

With hesitance, you start writing down the calculations and checking his reaction every once in a while, in case you got something wrong.

"Wait," he gently takes your hand and fixes a small mistake for you, then whisper. "Here, it's correct."

You're in silence for some instants, looking at the paper. The feeling of his hand still lingering on your skin. "Your fingers are cold."

"What?" Meeks looks at you confusedly and you shrug it off.

"Nothing," you sit closer to him on the bed, and pull a blanket over both off you. "I got this part. Explain the rest."

Still somewhat confused, he nodded and took the notebook back to teach her the other formulas. You noticed how satisfied he looked with his own explanation and smiled to yourself. It was nice to hear him talk, and you didn't feel bad about having him draw it for you anymore. If anything, it brought you a warm sensation on your chest.

Eventually, you leaned your head against his shoulder, which shut him up for a whole five seconds. You nudged his arm for him to go on, which he did in stuttered sentences and with an obvious blush.

"You know," Meeks shyly started after some other calculations were solved. "I can help you more often, if you need. It's no problem. And it's better than having to learn all this a day before and exam."

"That's lovely of you," you thank, "I appreciate the offer, and I probably will take it. I'm a hundred percent an humanities person, Electricity is a nightmare."

"Funny, I'm more of an Exact Science's person" he awkwardly chuckles, fixing his glasses with his pencil still on his hand. You smile at him, admiring him closely.

"Well, opposites do attract, right?"

His eyes really do look like they sparkle, specially only a few inches away from yours. Your lips felt awfully near his, all it would take was for him to lean in just a bit...

"Actually, wait a minute!" Meeks pulled away and looked for his notebook again, then went through it attentively. "I completely forgot to teach you about Work when a Test Charge moves! That'll definitively be on your exam!"

When he started to write a new formula, the only thought crossing your mind was "Oh my god, he's such a nerd", and you realized you were okay with it.

With your head on his shoulder again, you added to that thought that you even prefer him that way. Smiling proudly as he teaches you. In a way, it felt like care.

🧡🧡.

[episims]

Hanna "-see, there! A magazine. It has your name! It was meant to reach you. But it got here, by a mistake? Likely so."

Jonas "Yeah, probably a fringe benefit from my publisher. You can keep it."

Hanna "Is it here, on the roof? What you came for. Would make sense – you had all your things here."

Jonas "That's sort of the point of having your own space."

Hanna "Uncommon definition of space. Curious! There's no physical space allocated for me. Because I don't have things to keep in there? No need for clothes, soaps, books. But, ooh – I have a magazine! The one you gave to me. Do you have a new space now? For keeping your things in?"

Jonas "Eh. Not any more than you do, if you don't count some leftover corner at Judi's house."

Hanna "-oh, so you're in a hurry! Racing time, but time can't be raced. Racing dimension, or a concept of one? Needed for measuring but can't be reliably measured. Not enough processing capability for a definite answer. The need to be somewhere? Easier to perceive."

Jonas "Whatever you want to call it. Does Chase still force you to stay here...?"

Hanna "Force – not physically. By command? Yes! Chase Craig knows I can't violate a direct command. He told me to stay on the lot this morning. No new commands since then – no new loopholes."

Jonas "Figures. It's a shitty spot right now, but I can pay another visit tomorrow. Do you think we can arrange a loophole for you then?"

Hanna "Ooh, maybe! Chase Craig might give new orders. He usually does! He doesn't always notice the loopholes. Little flaws in his logic. Conflicting commands! But some restrictions are hard-coded. I can't travel to a big city-"

Jonas "Yeah, I was mostly thinking just visiting the town, so. I'll swing by in the morning."

[paleinc]

work and health vent and i'll take external validation because i keep talking myself out of it and missed my therapy appointment last week (overslept and missed it for the first time lol)

i'm agonizing over wanting a month off of work for fmla/stress leave when my coworker just had 3 months of short term disability and is on a part time schedule upon returning

i get so scared and tell myself i don't matter, and that i'll get yelled at for saying i need to look after my health over productivity (in a 2-person dev team bc uhh whoever budgeted this team did badly. everyone agrees that going from 8 to 1 dev(s) was a bad fucking choice but. contracts!) but i'm making small mistakes and need my body to just. stop. feeling so stressed out.

and ugh last session my therapist said, "well HE got accomodations, so they should be accomodating you too."

my behavior is so depressing. i'm in a shitty stressful spot and made progress in therapy, but therapy can't fix a shitty work situation. i need to stop beating myself up over it and move on. but i keep beating myself up for WANTING time off bc i've been in freeze mode for months. i sound crazy, but wanting a break from work and this problem coworker feels like trying to leave my abusive home life, except my wife and her mom aren't there to physically remove me from the situation. i feel small and like i don't matter, and no one wants me to rest or heal -- they just want me around to make their lives easier.

my deputy PM isn't my mom, he's probably just venting when complaining about said coworker (we're hiring someone else for him to train and manager's hinted at wanting me to train her partially bc problem employee is a problem). my knee-jerk reaction is to fix that problem. but i can't. he's been a problem employee for 2 years now and i'm getting judged for my lack of developmemt work (i'm also in meetings and handle many other smaller non-dev tasks). also HE'S the manager. i'm happy to give him insight on the project, but i don't want to manage people and do his job for him. he can leave if he doesn't want to deal with problem employee too.

also problem employee's wife (works at the same company) just got a juicy promotion. so i'm feeling pretty fucking resentful. that makes up for him being part time now, huh.

anyway, tomorrow i have a meeting w a manager who's supposed to look out for me (and he's been very receptive to my complaints), so i'll be able to exprees this shit to him tomorrow. this is what i get for struggling to communicate with people -- abruptly maybe taking leave.

then again, whatever, coworker didn't give much notice either.

[corvuscorona]

SHADOW MONSTER - an Astos playlist

...for when you need to spend about an hour rotating that guy in your mind at top speed, or at least a little faster than chillout speed.

(YouTube playlist here) • (tracklist etc. below the cut)

Needed a playlist I could Think About Astos To while doing chores or whatever & it turned out I had the ammunition I needed to be kinda picky, so I'm sharing it here with all my comrades-in-Astos-scholarship, too! You know, in case you also need some music to Think About Astos To. Which seems possible-to-likely, I think.

I have only included tracks that are reasonably well balanced for Normal Listening (just please forgive me for the PS2 synth horns in "finish the promise" if you can find it in your heart). Also, if you use the YT playlist, Man Human is shorter than it should be, so listen to it twice if you want.

ACT I: IMPETUS

Creep City • Jake Shears I said I'd hang on for the ride / now I'm hanging on for dear life / …is that a real knife? バケモノ信者 (Bakemono Shinja / Monster Believer) • MAIKI-P 人の顔した　バケモノさ / 気づけば僕も　バケモノさ • hito no kao shita bakemono sa / kizukeba boku mo bakemono sa it's a monster with a human face / and now that I think about it, I'm a monster, too 心臓 (Shinzō / Heart[1]) • TOOBOE 蘇ってしまうよ　貴方の為なら幾らでも / 間違いも愛せるよ　馬鹿なもんでさ / 生き返ってしまうよ　貴方がくれた命だから • yomigaette shimau yo anata no tame nara ikura demo / machigai mo aiseru yo baka na monde sa / ikikaette shimau yo anata ga kureta inochidakara for you, I'd revive again and again / loving even the mistakes, fool that I am / I'll come back to life because it's the life you gave me

ACT II: THE PROCESS

Bleed it Out • Linkin Park half the words don't mean a thing / and I know that I won't be satisfied Man Human • Denki Groove for Devilman Crybaby Just One Yesterday • Fall Out Boy I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way / still, I'd trade all my tomorrows…

ACT III: MADNESS

Décolleté • Kenshi Yonezu 兎角疲れました / 数えるから直ぐに消えて • tokaku tsukaremashita / kazoeru kara sugu ni kiete at any rate, I'm exhausted / I'll count, so hurry up and disappear [2] ��みなおし (Uminaoshi / Rebirth[3]) • Maretu 君は何も悪くないぜ / (多分) • kimi wa nani mo warukunai ze / (tabun) you've done nothing wrong / (probably) 空想メソロギヰ (Kuusou Mesorogiwi / Fantastical Mesology) • Yousei Teikoku for Future Diary (See [4] below.)

ACT IV: FOR WHAT

A Good Song Never Dies • Saint Motel it just reminds you of where you were / the first time it made you cry / the first time you felt alive… SHADOW MONSTER • Toki Asako 探しものは踊らなきゃ見つからない • sagashimono wa odoranakya mitsukaranai if we don't dance, we won't find what we're looking for.

ACT V: RESOLVE

JUMPER • CAPSULE anger stress and secrets they won't break you wake up put aside you(')r(e) feeling nothing freely speed up landing stepping jumping jump Leave The Light On • Overcoats what if I don't make it home / you're not there, and the light's not on

ACT VI: THE END

still feel. • half•alive when it's hopeless, I start to notice / that I still feel alive finish the promise • MOTOO FUJIWARA for Tales of the Abyss White Light • Superfly for Tales of Zestiria 正解なんてない 間違いなんてない / 塗り替えてゆけ 在るべき世界へ • seikai nante nai machigai nante nai / nurikaete yuke arubeki sekai e there's no such thing as right; there's no such thing as wrong / remake this world into what it should have been

( NOTES )

[1] - Specifically the anatomical term. Metaphorical uses of this word do seem to be a thing, but skew more towards meaning something like "courage" (think "guts" or "spine") as opposed to 心 (kokoro) on its own, which is used for something more like "essence", "spirit", "soul". Incidentally, I highly… HIGHLY recommend watching the MV for this one (Check the YT link before the readmore)! [2] - Eternal plug for vgperson, who has been my source for Kenshi Yonezu lyrics since something like 2010, and is the backbone of society. Check out the full translation there (ctrl+F the title!) to get a feel for this song's whole... vibe (which I'd describe as a very specific flavor of "fuck. god damn it. whatever; leave me alone," which of course is why it's here). [3] - There's a footnote on the Vocaloid Lyrics Wiki page for this song that conveys something interesting about the title; it says: "'Uminaoshi' isn’t a word that’s typically used to mean 'rebirth'; rather, it is a compound made up of a word meaning 'to give birth' and a word that carries the sense of doing something over to fix mistakes, because you messed it up the last time," which is fun, I think. [4] - This song's lyrics are poetic in a way that makes them difficult to interpret as-written, let alone translate in a way that makes literally any sense at all. The official MV does have English subtitles that are NOT auto-translated, though. Those are the most coherent piece of information I can give you (check the YT link before the readmore!) re: why the Future Diary OP is even in this playlist, except for this statement: it's about breaking free of a time loop that's being treated like a game in some way by The Entity In Charge Of It. (And also, it sounds like... you know, like the way that it sounds.)

[worldiary]

A few of you asked for progress updates on the crochet experiment, so here we are!

Thoughts on crocheting lace for the first time:

Glad I was forced to get a set of crochet needles, if I got to pick just one I think I accidentally would have gone too small.

Daiso has nice, cheap, lace yarn in a nice small bundle. Perfect for "idk if I'll keep up this hobby".

The upside of getting crochet needles the same day I got the yarn is that I was able to capitalize on my energy and my Sunday by getting started. The downside of not waiting for a tatting shuttle is that... I'm not sure I want to switch to a shuttle after I just bought a set of like 5 crochet needles. So maybe I'll wait until I'm bored of the crochet needles, if such a thing occurs?

My eyes and knuckles are confused by this sudden change in muscle usage. I feel like an old woman with my mildly sore knuckles and mildly irritated eyes. I work with computers, so I was excited to try a hobby that doesn't involve staring at a screen. But is it that much better if I'm staring even closer?

Oof, I'm terrible at it so far. Below is a pic from day 1. White is the YouTube video screenshot and navy blue is mine. You see how in the center of the white one there's a ring of little columns and then 2 layers up there's another ring of columns? That's (in theory) what I've achieved in the blue image. But! I'm not restarting anymore: done is better than perfect. And for a first project, it's not bad. It's in a circle shape, mostly.

Torn on my decision to start with a doily rather than straight lace. What I'm doing is less repetitive which means it's not boring (good) but I get less time to perfect each technique (bad). Also if one ring has a mistake in it, the next layer is built on that mistake (mixed). If it was straight lace, if I made a mistake it would look very obviously like a mistake, assuming I fixed it going forward. But I would get to start fresh each time. But! The doily shape is a little more usable (coaster)... Idk what I'd do with a straight strip of lace.

All that to say, once I finish this tragic coaster, maybe I'll try a straight lace strip next? If I don't try this again.

My fake!eureka moment at the end of day one/before starting to crochet in day 2 is: everything is secretly a chain stitch from a different angle. I noticed that every time I have to ladder up to the next layer, I do a bunch of chain stitches to fake whatever the end of the layer will connect to. Which suggests that all the dc-ing I'm doing through the rest of the layer will look exactly like my chain stitch by the end. I assume I'm actually wrong about this in general, but it at least seems true for this doily pattern. Maybe only true for the dc?

Today was day 2 and amusingly I started layer 5 and was like "Ohhh I think I finally understand what I did wrong in some of the previous layers. Great, I think I've got the hang of it, this is going to start looking a lot better" and then proceeded to make the most HORRIFIC layer. So now I've learned that consistent thread tension probably matters? Not that I know how to resolve that yet. Also, counting dc stitches is the worst. Chain stitches are short enough that they can sit in your bioRAM. By the time you finish one dc, you can't remember if it's your first or second one. So that probably didn't help. (Also no, I don't know what dc stands for. I think maybe double crochet? But I know it as the 1-in-pull-4to2-3to1). We'll see how layer 6 goes tomorrow! I'm optimistic it'll be better than layer 5 🤞

[living-d3ad-gh0ul]

Thursday 20th July 2023, 01.34am

I am feeling okay enough right now to write to you, to finally reply to you properly anyway. I've really missed being able to just do that.

Don't worry about your internet being shitty and going out and therefore not being able to stream, I figured there may have been some kind of issue or maybe you just weren't feeling up to it when I didn't see your name pop up on twitch. It's okay, I get it. I hope it's fixed now though and you can use the internet again at the very least.

I really did like how you handwrote me a note for my birthday. It's really personal, I love small gestures like that so much. And thank you for saying I looked beautiful in my outfits, I really liked them. And those cowboy boots are absolutely coming with me to London next month. I've got some ideas of some cool outfits I'm gonna wear while I'm down there. Because weirdly being in a big city like that makes me wanna look cool, probably because there's more people or something lol. Or maybe it's just because I feel like I can be more myself there than in my shitty little town. Who knows. And no, they didn't give me my tiara on a satin pillow, although I wish they had now you've mentioned it haha. I cannot BELIEVE you've never had Biscoff anything, E. I am truly and completely OFFENDED lol. Not really, but it's so bloody good, you have to try it! I love Biscoff milkshakes too, ughhhh so good! I do get what you mean about the too much sugar thing. I actually have to go to the dentist tomorrow morning cause I've cracked a tooth and it's really sensitive. Luckily it's one in the back, so it's not noticeable at all.

I really do feel like he was around me on my birthday. I kept just getting that like.. feeling? Idk if that makes sense. But I just felt his presence and it was comforting. I like when I feel like he's nearby me. It doesn't hurt as much during those times.

I really do hope you are starting to feel a bit less brain foggy and a little better now. I'm really sorry you've been feeling like that. I know how horrible and shitty that can be, cause I've been there. But I am so fucking proud of you for doing those little small things to change your habits. And yes you're right, don't force them. Because you really are less likely to actually make any significant or proper changes that you'll stick to if you force it. Small changes and taking things one step at a time is absolutely the right way to go about it and I'm so happy that you know that too. I totally get it with the sleep too, I've been feeling a lot like that recently as well. It's probably been stress on my part but I can absolutely relate to it. But please don't ever feel like you've failed. Because you're not a failure, you never will be. You're human and we sometimes go through rough patches and make mistakes, that's just completely normal and all part of the human experience. It's how we learn from those mistakes and get through those hard times that really show our strengths and I know you are absolutely full of those. You have so many strengths that I'm not sure you even know about yourself, E. You're totally right in doing things when you're awake and not limiting yourself because oh it's late or oh it's early or whatever. Obviously I get you don't wanna be noisy or whatever at night, but there's always ways of working around things like that and doing what you can even if it is late at night. I've definitely been there myself (sometimes recently too where I haven't been able to sleep at all, so instead of just laying in bed and ruminating on my thoughts, I'll get up and do something. Even if it's just washing the dishes from the night before or folding some laundry or sorting through some things or something like that.

I really do hope you managed to get your doctor's appointments sorted out though, because you're right, those are really important and I know I definitely don't want you to miss those or not get the help you need and end up sick or in pain. I'm sure you don't too, you know what I mean (hopefully). I just care about you a whole lot and want you to be safe and well and as healthy and happy as possible.

I totally get the feeling like streaming is a chore when you're brain foggy or got some stuff going on. It's partially why I stopped streaming. I really should pick it back up at some point, I wasn't far from having 200 followers and I really enjoyed doing it actually. I think I prefer playing games with people on stream however, because I sometimes don't know what to say when no one's there or no ones talking in the chat lol. I do miss it, because it is fun, maybe I'll do a little one off stream one day. I'll let you know if I do, it'd be nice to see you there if you weren't busy on that day. Doing all the alerts and stuff was probably one of my favourite parts of streaming. I really enjoyed all that and even had an old friend I went to music college with make me some custom alerts. I think I still have them all saved on my OBS and stuff. I will say, I did go back to see your vod the other day but it's gone I think. Idk, I just kinda.. missed your voice. Whatever game you play on stream, it'll be fun. I know it will. I can't wait for more tentacleman and cyberpunk, when you're ready to of course. Please don't rush yourself or force yourself if you're not feeling up to it. I can wait, I'll always wait. Beach House are amazing. I do love them myself. Space Song is my all time favourite song too.

Last Wednesday was incredibly hard. It was such a difficult day for me. At one point I nearly just crumbled to the ground. I did read your post that evening when I got home. And I'm so thankful you posted it/were thinking of me at the time it was all happening. I really really am so grateful and God.. it just really fucking made my heart grow ten times. I really liked it, it made me feel all.. fuzzy or something. Your post really did help me too. I've been reading it over and over again. But's been so hard, E. Doing everything myself for dad. I've had no help from my mum or anyone really. Infact, my mum hasn't spoke to me since her birthday which was 4/5 days before the funeral. She didn't even text me to say she hoped things went well. I think you can see why I'm not really talking to her right now. My friend Sophie came to my dad's funeral with me which I was really grateful. She held my hand the whole way through and kept telling me how well I was doing and how he'd be so proud of me. I really hope he is. I still don't feel like it's real. I feel like it's all a bad dream and I just can't wake up from it. I keep looking at the order of service and the pictures and all his things sitting in my spare bedroom and I just keep thinking to myself "what the fuck?". I think now that everything is said and done, all the formalities are done and (most of) the paperwork and legal stuff is done and now it's all just like.. final.. it's still not sunk in. I still cannot believe that I won't ever hear my dad picking up the phone and saying "Hiya gorgeous" or how he'd always give me a kiss down the phone after saying goodbye before he hung up. My grief is sitting so heavy within me and I am trying so hard to not let it destroy me, but sometimes it's just so hard. I miss him so fucking much. I'll miss him for the rest of my life. I want to live my life for him and have a good one, because that's all he said that he wanted for me. He just wanted me to be happy and have a good life. But I know I'll always be missing a huge part of me, because he won't be there. He's the one person who was always there, no matter what, no matter if we'd argued or fallen out or whatever, if I needed him he was there. He's the one person who's never up and left and never came back. And now he's gone. He's been snatched away from me in such a cruel way and my heart hurts so much when I think of it all. I'm trying so hard to keep going, I really am, but everything just feels so... Hard right now. I'm desperately trying to look forward to going to see Joji next month in London and the little long weekend I have planned down there (I still don't know what I'm doing really apart from the concert, but I may just wing it). I know he would want me to go and enjoy myself and have fun, he wouldn't want me not to go or not to enjoy myself. Like I said, he just wanted me to have a good life and I want to do things for him, if not for myself.

I go back to work next Monday, I was supposed to go back this week and I did technically but.. I think I went back too soon. So I think after this week, I'll be in a much better space mentally to go back. I just need to rest and take time for me, try and process some of all that's happened, at least a little bit. I really hope this letter finds you well, I know it's a little long but I hope it wasn't too much of a boring or long read. I really can't wait to hear from you again soon, E.

I'm gonna put the video of all the bikes that showed up for my dad on the day. It really overwhelmed me, but in a good way. I thought I'd only have 3 or 4. But nope. A tonne showed up. And I have a couple of mine and my dad's friend's to thank for that. I hope you don't think it's weird or strange or anything.. I just.. idk it was nice to see how many people cared about my dad. I'll also show you the flowers. I organised them myself and chose them all. I thought they were really pretty. I'll also show you my nails I had especially done, with his initial and his favourite colour. We all wore yellow for him on the day too.

"But I miss you more each day you're not with me, and just know when I sleep that I'm dreaming of the only place I wanna be.."

[artikgato]

8/9/2023

It's day 3 of me waking up at 5am, going jogging, and writing about it. Not too much happened on the mental health jogwalk this morning, to be honest. I did start right before sunrise again, but that was a mistake. I thought my route went west to east, but it actually must go northish to southish or something, because I rounded a corner this morning and was blinded by sunlight. Right to the face.

This time I also noticed as approached the main road, the distinct smell of exhaust fumes. It was almost like a wall of smelliness. I don't think I noticed it yesterday, or at least it wasn't as pronounced. It was also a little bit hotter today because it didn't rain last night. Either way, my grudge against this main road only grows. It's nearly impossible to make a left turn onto this road without having to either wait for a while, pray that people know how to use their brakes, or both. It's noisy - for the first part of my jogwalk, through the nice neighborhood, I can have my headphones down around my neck and hear the music just fine. Once I get near the road I have to put them on or I can't hear anything, just because of the traffic. And now there's the smell. It's not like the neighborhood smells like roses and cardamom or whatever, but the distinct lack of exhaust fumes and diesel is probably going to be pretty stark tomorrow, now that I've noticed it.

Things are slowly improving, though! I still haven't timed myself on this mental health jogwalk, but I'll bet once I do I'll notice improvements. I've identified a few sections with memorable start and stop points that I can jog between, and just from Monday to today I've noticed that I'm not nearly as tired at the end of the jog sections. My thighs are a little sore, but that's par for the course I guess. I'm also not getting winded when I climb the three flights of stairs up to the apartment. Progress!

Eventually, I'll start working on writing projects in the mornings and these daily rambles will get shorter. For now I'm okay with having this be my daily word count. Speaking of which, I probably should start doing word counts.

Anyway, if I can keep up this waking up early, mental health walk, writing every day routine even on workdays, I might start trying to incorporate more things. In addition to just having a flat 1000k minimum word count for the day, I might also have a daily goal of working on the novel or a WIP of some sort each day. Maybe I'll make it a goal to work on at least one artist alley project each day. I might try to stream once or twice a week again, that was fun. I need to get back to my stupid long nuzlocke series. Maybe I'll open one of the hundreds of bookmarks I have saved for a free online learning thing to teach a new skill and try to actually learn something new. Ooh, maybe I'll get back to doing duolingo. Maybe.

Signing off for day three, hopefully this continues!

Word count: 541

[agoodfictitle-shadowban]

The Price You Pay - Part 3

Wanda Maximoff x f!reader

[TPYP Masterlist]

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: Life as a college student isn’t always easy, so when the opportunity to make some money by pretending to date your best friend’s sister arise, you decide to take it.

Tags: fake dating, paid dating, jealousy, possessiveness, Pietro’s bestie, darkish!wanda, no Avengers, bad life decisions, college!au, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, divorced!parents, Vision is kind of a dick, other mcu characters apparition, no proofreading (lemme know if im missing something)

Warnings: Bad language, alcohol consumption, some violence, smuttyfruity (so, 18+, minors dni, dom!Wanda, bratty!reader, dub con touching, will add warnings when we get to it)

A/n: sooo my sister's cat that im supposed to keep has fled, so if i disappear you'll know why

Tag List: @red1culous @sayah13 @princess-kennys-rats @marrymemcgrath

Opening your eyes the next day was the worst mistake of your life, your brain pulsating against your cranium like a monkey trying to escape its cage by banging a wrench on the iron bars. You winced, but still looked around. You noticed the glass of water with Advils next to you and took it without a second thought to drink it, thanking your past self for its foresight. Wait… you frowned. Did you? You retraced your steps at the end of the night and then it clicked. It must have been Wanda.

Wanda… everything from yesterday suddenly came back to you and you blinked. All the small touches, the various kisses, and what you accidentally heard too. The way she made sure you wouldn't talk was etched in your brain, too. It all made you want to disappear in your bed again for the day. This was certainly the best way to face everything.

But then you opened an eye to look at the now empty glass of water. Whatever happened she was nice enough to take care of you until you were safely home and even make sure you'd have a vaguely nice morning, which meant you were probably okay. Which was good, because she still had to give you your hoodie back. And pay you. And that was already going to be awkward enough without adding another layer to it.

Now, it meant that you had to contact her. You extended your hand and grabbed your phone that was in your jeans pocket and took a quick look. You had a few texts from Pietro sending you memes - you took the time to react - and to your surprise you already had a message from Wanda.

[01:13 am - Wanda] Hope you sleep well and your hangover isn't too bad tomorrow. Send me a message when you wake up.

You rolled on your back to look at the message better. She must have sent it when she got home or around that time, so it at least gave you an idea of when you yourself arrived. Now you just had to answer.

[11:37 am - Y/n (neighbor)] Only woke up. Thx for the water. Wanna meet today?

You looked at your phone for a few seconds, seeing the sent sign next to the message before you decided to get up. You were in dire need of a shower, and a breakfast. When you came out of the shower you noticed that she had already answered you.

[11:41 am - Wanda] Did you drink it all? What time works for you?

[11:55 am - Y/n (neighbor)] Yeah, I did, it was a life saver. In 30min? 

This time you were downstairs, preparing some food for yourself when she answered.

[11:58 am - Wanda] I'll be there

You looked at your toast and eggs and stretched, leaving her on read since the time had been agreed upon. It took you fifteen more minutes to eat and brush your teeth so you would be ready for when she showed up. That was a good opportunity to check on your socials until the doorbell rang and you got up to go get it.

Wanda looked as fresh as a flower, like she never even got to a party yesterday, and you felt out of place with your sweatpants and sports bra since the temperatures were already going high today. Until something got your attention. She was actually wearing your hoodie - she even had rolled up the sleeves, allowing you to see her numerous bracelets on her wrists and rings on her fingers. You blinked a few times when you noticed, and as she did the last time she was at your door, she came in without waiting to be invited. You didn't even think to protest, simply letting her in. She took an envelope out of the pocket of the hoodie and handed it to you.

"Here, for yesterday," she said with a very calm voice. Very awkwardly you took it, not really knowing what to do with it now that you had it. "You can count if you want."

"No, I trust you," you blurted out nervously. Why did you have to be such a wreck? "Thanks." You eyed your hoodie, and she must have noticed because she smirked.

"Was that all?" She asked teasingly, taking a step your way, her hand chasing a loose hair on your collarbone before she flattened her palm against your shoulder. "Or was there something else you wanted to tell me?"

You nervously played with your fingers, deciding to quickly hide them in your pockets to stop. It didn't help that she traced some small circles against your skin. "Um. Can I get back my hoodie." She cocked her other eyebrow. "Please."

"That's what I like to hear." Her fingers went up your neck, light as feathers, and you knew there was a line of goosebump where she touched you. She wanted to play some more with you, suggest that you were the one to take it off, but she knew it would be pushing you too much for now. So she stopped touching you, and she took off the hoodie to put it on your shoulders.

That's when you realized it smelled like her now. Lilac, rose, and sandalwood. You wondered if it was on purpose, but there was no way. It was probably just because it was in her room or something.

"Thanks," you said, quickly. "Maybe next time if you need to borrow something you can just ask, or something." It was a simple joke but the way she smirked told you there was something she found amusing that you didn't quite get.

"I'll think about it." She took a step towards the door at that moment, and you followed her with your gaze. Before she could move too far she turned to you again. "If I ever need you again, I'll let you know."

"I might want to renegotiate my rates after the third time." This time she laughed and shook her head, licking her lips before she answered.

"If you do as good a job as yesterday I'll make sure to reward you accordingly." Something was telling you she might be talking about something else than money, and your imagination ran wild with images from yesterday.

She disappeared from the house and you blinked a few times before you regained your focus on reality.

*

Running was a good way to clear your mind, but it wasn't so good when you were trying to keep up with Pietro. He was running circles around you while each breath you took felt like torture. Lucky for you, you were almost done making your way around the neighborhood, and you could see his house standing right next to yours. You assembled the meagre energy that was left in you and made one last sprint before you completely stopped once you reached his door, simply collapsing on the march in front of it.

"Hey, that wasn't so bad, was it, Y/n?"

"That was hell," you answered, taking the bottle he was extending towards you to take a big swing. Then you proceeded to throw some more water on your face.

"That's payback for when you had me swim five kilometers the other day."

"That was for your own good," you protested. "Plus it's not my fault if you took my remark as a challenge."

"How is 'I bet you can't keep up with me' not a challenge?"

He had a point, and just as you were about to answer masterfully, the window next to the door opened and Wanda's head popped here.

"I'm trying to read, do you have to be so noisy, both of you?" Her glare stopped on you longer than it should have, taking note of your general appearance after you exercised.

"What? we're not doing anything wrong, are we?" You asked with a shit eating grin. "Or is talking illegal now?"

Something dark crossed her eyes, and you almost missed it. You wondered what it was, and if it had anything to do with what you heard the other day, or if she was just pissed. More likely, it was the second one.

"Pietro, get your bestfriend under control, or she's not allowed inside ever again."

He laughed at that, and you snorted. "Like anyone could ever control Y/n."

Wanda narrowed her eyes at that, in the same way Pietro did whenever he was issued a challenge, but she said nothing and simply closed the window. Probably to get back to reading.

"Alright, I'm going to shower and change. Still up for food and a game after?"

"Yeah, yeah. See you in a few minutes."

You stood up and walked to your home, your calves on fire, but you managed to arrive. This time you opted for a nice short and a sleeveless top when you came out of the shower, and finally joined the Maximoff household. Once inside, you joined Pietro on the couch and you started playing as you waited for the food. Wanda was nowhere to be seen, and you guessed she probably chose to go read upstairs knowing you would be playing in the living room. It took some time for the pizzas to show up, and when they did, Pietro turned to you.

"I'm gonna go grab them, you think you can get Wanda to join us?"

You nodded at that, getting up and stretching as you stood up to get upstairs. You had enough sleepovers to know where Wanda's room was, so you were quick to stand in front of her door. But, as you stood there, you swore you could hear her voice coming in hushed moans from the other side. Her voice. Saying your name. At this point, you just wanted so many different things, your brain - and body - pulling you in so many different directions. You wanted to stay there and listen, wetness growing between your legs unto your panties, and you wanted to flee, act like you heard nothing and leave all this behind you. A small voice also whispered so you would open the door, maybe just a crack, to see what exactly was going on in the room. In the end, you chose to be sensible, and you simply knocked on the door.

"Food has arrived Wanda," you announced through the door and all noise ceased on the other side.

"I'll be there in a minute," she answered, and you were certain you could hear the heavy breathlessness in her voice.

You had done what was required of you, now you could go back downstairs and act like nothing ever happened. Except it did, and the way your underwear felt was the witness of what you heard. You sighed; you were going to be so uncomfortable for the rest of the night.

You walked in the living room and sat back on the couch where Pietro was waiting for you with the food. "Took you long enough," he remarked.

"It took a bit for your sister to answer," you deflected. And speaking of the Devil, she joined you, a small paid cover around the shoulders.

"I fell asleep." She sat between you and Pietro, instead of taking the free couch. For a second you considered changing sides but thought it might look suspicious, so you stayed where you were. "Pizza again?"

You rolled your eyes. "If you're not happy with that, you can always cook."

The offhand comment got her attention, and she tilted her head at you. The way her gaze burned onto you made you want to apologize, but you stayed strong. You focused on the tv where you had resumed playing with Pietro. She hated that she had to let it slide for now, so instead she decided to grab the tv controller and change the input.

"Oh, come on, Wan!" Pietro complained. "We're playing!"

"And I want to watch something while I eat."

As usual with his sister, he let it go rather fast, and soon enough the three of you were watching one of her favourite sitcoms. During this time she started to expand her territory on the couch, and you found yourself closer with her than you were when she first joined, her plaid now covering her legs and yours. It felt nice in the air conditioned room considering the shorts you were wearing, so you didn't bother getting it off you, and in retrospect you realized it might have been a mistake, because you quickly felt Wanda's hand on your thigh.

At first, you thought you had imagined it. It was just a brush of the finger, just a mistake that still made you go straight in your seat. But quickly it happened again to form a caress on your skin, something that was definitely deliberate, and you didn't know what to do. So you did nothing. You let her continue, let her fingertips explore your exposed skin under the plaid, and prayed Pietro wouldn't see the way you tensed. Luckily, for now, he was on his phone.

But Wanda got bolder at your lack of reaction. Her fingers became her whole hand, and the exploration became more involved, prying open your legs so she could put her hand inside your thigh. Warmth spread inside you like a wildfire and you pinched your lips to avoid making any noise that could signal what was going on. Not that you had any idea of what it actually was, because what the hell was Wanda thinking right now?

You glanced at her to try and understand, but her eyes were focused on the screen in front of her like nothing was happening. Whatever game she was playing, she knew how to hide it, but you decided it was enough of it when her pinky started hiking up under your shorts. This was too much, you had to stop her before she went too far, no matter how good it was and how much you just wanted to see how far she was going to go. You were right next to Pietro, for fuck's sake!

So you put your hand on hers and tried to move it away. You placed it back on her own leg, and hoped it was where it would end, but as soon as you retreated, she was back where she was before - just not exactly as far. You decided to let her have it, especially when your best friend took the tv controller at the end of the show's episode to switch back to your game.

"Sorry Wan, dinner is done, it's our time again."

"It's fine," she answered as you grabbed your controller, "it's also fun to watch you play."

At her words, her hand slipped back between your thighs and you thought about dying on the spot. There was no way you would be able to focus with her hand there, going up and down, playing with the hem of your shorts and making it ride up, and up, but with the game going on you also couldn't do anything against it, not without Pietro noticing something. That wasn't even talking about your soaked underwear, or the fact that you could barely hold the controller and focus on the screen.

Your salvation came in the form of a call your best friend had to take.

"Ah, shit, sorry, I'll be back in a sec."

"Yeah, no problem," you answered, not without difficulty to keep your voice steady. Once he was out of the room, you took off the plaid from your legs and Wanda's hand, taking some distance from her. "What the fuck are you doing?!" You whisper-yelled at her.

"Me? I'm just having a bit of fun. Don't you like it?" She tilted her head with a small smile, looking perfectly calm and collected.

"That's not the point," you hissed. "Pietro is right there, and we're not– we're not like that."

She hummed, looking you up and down. You weren't ready yet, but she'd get there, eventually. If it weren't for this pesky call, she would already have gotten away with a lot more than she did, so you were on your way to her.

"Alright," she gave up and rolled her eyes, before she leaned closer, her voice hitting the lower range. "But don't tell me you didn't like it as much as I did. Your eyes are begging for more."

And you knew she was probably right. For all your protestations, the simple caresses she gave you lit you up and high, and in other circumstances you would certainly have buckled under her. But not like that.

She smiled, satisfied, when you failed to contradict her and she stood up from the couch.

"I'm going to bed. I'll see you soon, Y/n."

And with that she disappeared from the room. The rest of the night was uneventful, but when you got home later on, you noticed your hoodie hanging on your desk chair.

With a fair bit of hesitation, you grabbed it and smelled it briefly. Now that you were alone in your room, the idea of Wanda with her hand between your thighs sounded heavenly.

[livingkore]

Yes Sir, I Can Boogie (Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader -ONESHOT)

Warnings: harassment at a party, alcohol, curse words, grammar mistakes probably.

Summary: Y/N gets drunk at a party and the high school freak seems the only one who can help her.

Notes: A silly short idea I had, it’s all fluff. I’m trying not to fall into the angst hole ‘cause it’s so easy to and Eddie deserved the world.

Y/N woke up with a throbbing headache.

She groaned in pain and rubbed her forehead.

After getting used to the horrible feeling she opened her eyes and frowned in confusion. That wasn't the ceiling of her home. Her bedroom had a window and it definitely didn't have an Ozzy Osbourn poster and an electric guitar, let alone a mattress on the floor.

Where was she? What had happened last night?

She tried to get up -ignoring the dizziness and the nausea growing in her throat, and clumsily walked out of the room.

It smelt like coffee and cigarettes and it made a knot in her stomach. 

In the next room stood no other than Eddie 'The Freak' Munson pouring himself a cup of coffee.

"Good morning, sweetheart" he grinned. "Well, actually is like 1 PM but you know, I'm not judging anyone here."

Y/N froze like a deer in headlights.

How on earth did she landed on Munson's mattress? How did she manage to sleep until the afternoon? Wasn't she just at Steve Harrington's party? Most importantly, where the hell was Nancy?

"You okay?" The metalhead asked noticing her confusion.

"What am I doing here?"

"Huh?" The boy raised his eyebrows in surprise.

She put a hand on her mouth as an unexpected thought crossed her mind.

"Oh my God, did we...?"

"Wha-- oh, no!" he quickly left his cup on the table. 

"No, no, no. I'm not a freak really, it's just a name that got stuck---"

"Then what am I doing here?" she asked more firmly.

"You don't remember?" he said almost disappointed. "Let me tell you..."

_____________

"It's not to late to go back." Y/N suggested on the passenger seat, once the car stopped.

"Oh, come on!" dismissed Nancy putting the car keys on her purse. "Don't be like that, we're gonna have a nice time.”

"You are gonna have a nice time, you mean. I'll be just wandering about while you and Steve do whatever you do when you're together."

"Stop!" the eldest Wheeler softly slapped her arm.

"Why did you want me to come, anyways? I don't know anyone in here."

"Well, that's the point of a party, right? You get out of your confort zone, you meet people. It won't do you any harm."

"Whatever." 

They both got out of the car and walked to Steve Harrington's house. The breeze hit her face making suddenly aware of where she was going.

Why was she nervous?

Nancy rang the bell and moments later the door opened, revealing an already stressed Steve.

"Hey! Nance, Y/N. You're here. Great. Just --come on, make yourself at home." Y/N looked at her friend and raised her eyebrows.

"Is everything alright?" Nancy asked her boyfriend.

"Oh no -yeah, definitely." he tried to smile with no avail. "Tommy just happened to tell me a minute ago that he invited Hargrove, I'm just trying to no lose my shit, you know."

"Or you can just not let him in." Y/N shrugged.

"Yeah, no thanks. I prefer not getting into a fight tomorrow at practice, not that I wouldn't win." he said looking at his girlfriend with a charming smile. "Would you help me with these beers, Nance?"

"Sure."

And that was it. Y/N knew just as she saw her friend walking away from her sight with her boyfriend, that she wouldn't see them around anytime soon.

She sighed and approached the kitchen counter.

Hawkins didn't exactly have mansions, but Steve lived in one of the most expensive houses of the town. It had very tall ceilings and weird paintings on the walls. 

The girl didn't know if she felt like meeting people in a place where she wasn't feeling confortable. Maybe she needed a drink.

She opened up the freeze and to her big disappointment, it was full of beer, so she turned around hopelessly thinking that she would have to spend the night sober. 

To her surprise, she spotted a bottle of vodka on the side of the kitchen counter.

She sighed and looked around for the owner, but it was only her and the bottle in the room.

It was better than nothing.

_____________

The whole room was spinning around but that wasn't a problem. For Y/N L/N it meant she was on top of the world.

She passed through people; they were all familiar faces from school. She knew Steve was popular but she never thought he might actually know the whole school.

How many people there were?

She scoffed. 

Doing maths was hard enough when sober. 

The girl took another sip from the bottle and went right to a group of people who were dancing. Her whole body felt heavy and clumsy but she moved it from side to side and closed her eyes, concentrating on the song.

What was it called? 

"I love this song." a voice said next to her.

She opened her eyes uncomfortably at the bright lights.

"Huh?" she mumbled confused, why was Jason Carver speaking to her?

"I love this song" he repeated in her ear. "I think you just made it better."

"How?" she raised her eyebrows.

"You're a great dancer, Y/N." She took a step back studying the boy.

The girl could see his friends in the back, looking at them -but she didn't understand why. She just had a bad feeling in her stomach, could she be about to vomit?

"How do you know my name?" Jason rolled his eyes.

"It's not that big of a school, and it's hard not to notice you. Look, you wanna take this somewhere else? Like somewhere more private?"

"No, thank you." She took another sip and kept on dancing but Jason grabbed her wrist.

"Come on, it's gonna be fun. Just you and me, I'll be a gentleman, I promise."

"I really should stay here waiting for Nancy--"

"She's probably busy with Harrington" his grip got more firmly making her suddenly aware of her surroundings.

"N-no, I don't want to."

"You're playing way too hard to get, babe."

"She said no, Carver." Y/N started to shake when she realized she was between two men and one of them didn't feel like letting her go.

Where was Nancy? Why did everyone keep on dancing?

She could feel her heart beat in her ears as the walls started closing in.

"Get out, freak." Jason said between his teeth.

"I don't think so, babe." Eddie Munson mocked him, making the blonde boy let go of Y/N's hand.

"You've just pissed me off, I'll beat your ass--"

"Nah, man. Harrington's gonna be the pissed one if you lay a hand on his dealer at his own party. Now, this is what will happen, you'll stop being a pervert and you won't see Y/N for the rest of the night, alright?" 

Eddie Munson grabbed the girl's hand and stormed to the second floor.

Going up the stairs was a terrible idea when everything was spinning around but at the speed that they were going and in which Y/N's heart was beating, she couldn't do much but put her weight into the boy's hand.

He quickly opened a door and they got in. Y/N groaned at the bathroom light. "You okay?" he asked expectantly.

"Yeah, yeah. I was just dancing...  give me a minute." she sat down on the closed toilet. "Right... sorry.""

Did he hurt you or something?" The boy studied her body anxiously.

"Or something... he was being dense, but's alright... I'm fine -yeah, totally. You, Eddie Munson, are my hero."

The girl tried to bow in gratitude but she suddenly stopped at the dizziness.

"Did you come here on your own?" Eddie laid against the bathroom sink.

"Why?-- Oh my god, I'm-- you're a freak too!"

"W-what? No!" he shook his head desperately. "Well, yeah I am, I guess -but not in that sense, I promise. I won't do anything."

Y/N stood there contemplating him. He looked nice, or maybe her standards suddenly dropped to hell by the uncomfortable moment she had just lived with Jason downstairs. Or maybe it was the alcohol inducing in her this euphoric feeling that this was her last day on earth.

"Nah, we've definitely been missing on you."

"What?"

"I said --shit." she giggled and tried to take another sip of the bottle that she was still holding but the boy grabbed it out of her hand in time.

"Yeah -no, I don't think that's a good idea." Y/N scoffed.

"Why not? Nancy was the one that drove us and she's probably spending the night here... so, I guess I'll walk home so gimme the bottle."

"Nope."

"Yep."

"Nope."

"Yep."

"Don't you feel like throwing up?" Eddie sighed.

"Nope." Y/N shook her head and didn't have the time to realize her terrible mistake before everything turned black.

"Hey, hey, hey" she could hear Eddie's voice.

"Hmm..."The girl opened her eyes to find herself on the bathroom floor with her back against the bathtub and the boy's worried face inches away from hers as he shook her.

"Come on, sweetheart, wake up."

"...'m here." Eddie let a relieved sigh and sat down next to her.

"Goddamn, Y/N. You scared the shit out of me."

"What are you talking about? You're the creepy one, with you know... the tattoos and yeah..."

"Does that bother you?"

"You've got no idea, Munson." She grinned. Next to her, Eddie covered his face with a strand of his hair and kept quiet. "Oh my God, did I say something wrong? I didn't mean to--"

"No, no. It's fine. It's just that you shouldn't do that --you're drunk and you don't probably mean it --which is fine! Totally fine--"

"Well, I'll say it tomorrow." she stared at him and raised her eyebrows.

"Don't say it if you don't mean it, L/N." he warned her. "You don't own me anything."

"I'm drunk I'm not blind and I think you're pretty handsome."

"Y/N, stop it's not fair."

"What’s not fair?"

"I've been meaning to talk to you ever since the beginning of the year and I didn't because I thought it'd creep you out and now... ugh-- forget it." 

Y/N blinked, feeling the awareness slowly returning to her body.

She frowned. Right, they shared Maths. She remembered seeing his curly mullet in the back of the classroom but she never thought he would be into making friends, besides his club. All he would do was sleep and look through the window.

"Why would I be scared?" Eddie looked at her and scoffed.

"People literally think I'm a cult leader or some shit."

"Don't you play D&D with Mike?"

"I'm sorry, you know about D&D?"

“Sure, I mean --no, not really. But whenever we had a sleepover at Nancy's, Mike was always playing it with his friends."

"So wait, just to check in, you are not scared."

"Nope."

"And how many fingers do I have?" He showed her his hand.

"I'd assume twenty with your toes but I'm not sure."

"Yeah, you're better I guess."

They stood in silence.

Eddie felt uncomfortable in his clothes. He wondered if the sun was already out.

"Yes Sir, I Can Boogie!" Y/N suddenly yelled.

"Excuse me?" Eddie put a hand on his chest.

"That's the name of the song I was dancing to, I couldn't remember it. Ugh... such a banger."

"For fuck's sake, you keep scaring me. I thought you were all shy like Wheeler or something.”

She felt her heart drop and tried to hide her face between her knees.

"Sorry to disappoint you."

"N-no, no. It's not like --it's not a bad thing"

"Thanks, I guess." The girl looked at him surprised.

"Y-yeah..."

She started fidgeting with her fingers and finally sighed.

"I guess I should be going, I bet it's pretty late."

"You're not walking home on your own at these hours, right?"

"Well yeah, don't worry I'm not that drunk anymore."

"Do you live nearby?"

"Not really, but I was planning on crashing at Nancy's. I can't be seen in this state at home."

"But Wheeler's probably asleep in the other room." Eddie frowned wondering if she was really as sober as she seemed.

"Yeah, but Mike's probably awake, or Dustin or Will. Lucas is probably asleep already."

He looked at her half worried, half amazed that she would even think of walking who-knows-how-many miles in that state.

"Why don't you crash at my place?" he asked as if it were the most obvious solution. Y/N's felt her face burn. "W-wait, not like that. I- I won't do anything I promise." 

"I -I know." she stuttered. "Where do you live?"

"At the trailer's park."

"Fine." She said as she clumsily stood up, a move that woke up the dizziness within her. "Shit, I'm drunk."

"You need help?" the boy also stood up.

"Nah I-- damn, that's me?" She looked in the mirror and noticed her smudged make-up "And you wanted to talk to me since the beginning of the year?"

"Yeah, now come on." Eddie softly pushed her out of the bathroom before she could see the embarrassment on his face.

_____________

"Oh, I remember all of that. I just don't remember... what happened later." Y/N said while looking at her cup of coffee in her hands.

Eddie's trailer looked disorganized. She didn't know why there was so many bottles in the corner of the room but she thought the dark place was the most appropriate one to have the hangover she was experiencing at the moment.

"Yeah, well..." Eddie grinned awkwardly. "I put on the radio and you passed out."

"Oh no" Y/N groaned hiding her face in her arms in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't be, it was funny." He took a last sip from his cup. "I've never thought Motorhead wrote lullabies."

"Wait, does that mean you had to carry me all the way 'til here?"

Y/N wanted the earth to swallow her, she wanted to pull all her hair out, to scream, anything but having to deal with the consequences of last night.

She met a cute boy from her class and his first impression was him having to carry her drunken body to his house. 

That was why she couldn't have nice things.

Eddie raised his eyebrows. He could see the five stages of grief go through her face and it made him laugh out loud. 

"I had a great time last night." was something Y/N never thought would hear.

"What are you talking about?" She desperately said. "Oh my God, I’ve probably made a fool out of myself!"

"Yeah, by talking to me."

The girl stared at him confused.

For being so extroverted, Eddie Munson seemed to look ashamed of himself. Maybe that was what happened when everyone in town would create a narrative of who you were supposed to be.

Y/N knew he wasn't the creepy one last night.

"I've never thought you would care about what people said." Eddie scoffed.

"I don't. Why would I care about what perverts like Carver said? You shouldn't either but it doesn't change how people perceive me, I guess."

"I really don't care." Y/N watched the sunlight entering through the small window. "I just wish I'd have met you sober."

"Well, that can be arranged, sweetheart." The boy grinned.

"Huh?"

"I mean... we could go out, you know-- a non-alcoholic night out. You can introduce yourself, tell me what you do and all that stuff."

Y/N almost spat out the coffee in her mouth. She felt like laughing, not in a mocking way.

Maybe it was the caffeine but she felt like jumping all around.

She cleared her voice. She didn't need to embarrass herself even more in front of him.

"I -you are... I mean -are you asking me out, Munson?"

That went terribly.

Y/N stood up quickly and left the mug behind. She felt way too big and clumsy, her hands were sweaty and she didn't know where to hide them. She gave the boy her back, fearing her face would have gone completely red.

Now she was standing in the middle of the room and leaving wasn't an option when the sun was so high up in the sky and she would have to walk who-knows-how-many miles, and yet -sitting down again wouldn't make any sense either.

"Wait!" Eddie also stood up, the chair making a horrible noise against the floor. "I didn't mean --it's okay if you don't want to, you know."

Y/N turned around. Her face wasn't red but she looked quite conflicted.

"No! I mean I want to-- It's just that nobody-- I've never --I'm so hungover, this is not how I've planned it!"

Eddie slowly approached her and stared at her. She was sure she could see her desperate face in the reflection of his eyes.

He raised his eyebrows, mocking her.

"You want me to try again tomorrow or...?"

"I'm free tonight" she mumbled.

Eddie grinned and gently caressed her left cheek with his calloused fingers.

"Would it spoil your plans if I kissed you right now?" 

Y/N thought she would burn into flames if she dared to speak so she shook her head.

Eddie's lips were soft against hers. He tasted like coffee and she knew she tasted like that as well.

The girl began trembling, she didn't know what she was doing but she held onto the metalhead's shirt for dear life. His fingers slowly caressed her back making her moan at the new feeling but he got apart not before planting a soft kiss where her jaw ended and her neck began.

"So tonight, huh?" he whispered with a raspy voice.

"F-forget about tonight, kiss me again."

[imaginingmanyfandoms]

Paul's Lullaby | part two

<previous | next>

It had been a few days since your attack on the beach. Since then, Paul really didn't like when you were home alone. Or walking to work alone. Or anywhere alone really. It didn't have to be with him, but he needed to know he, or someone he trusted could get to you in time.

He was worried that the leech had caught your scent, and would come back. Sam didn't think so, Sam was under the impression that this person was actually testing their lines, and he wouldn't let the same mistake happen again. You were still waiting for Paul to tell you the whole truth, but you were being patient, as he had been with you. It was clear that whatever it was, was hard for him to say.

Your couch was permanently occupied by Paul, who picked you up from work to drive you home. And if he couldn't make it, he'd send one of the pack, or one of the imprints to pick you up and bring you to Emily's house.

You were cautiously optimistic about where things were going with Paul. There was still some trust issues, but you were working on it together. And no matter how much Embry or Jared talked about Paul's anger issues, you didn't really see it.

Currently, you were at Emily's, sitting on the couch and trying to stay awake until Paul got there. He made you feel safe.

"Have you seen this?" Emily asked holding a newspaper. There were missing people all over Seattle. It's what had Paul working overtime. He was pulling more than his fair share, and you knew that had to do with you. But you didn't understand what.

"Is anyone ever going to tell me what's going on?" you asked, but your tone was light, joking. Emily laughed, and sat by your legs on the couch.

"Paul really is taking his time, huh?" She gave you a sad smile. "He's doing that for your benefit."

"I know, I know," you said. "I'm just really confused. I swear the scenarios I'm making up in my head must be worse."

"Probably," she said. You both laughed this time.

"Well he better snap to it."

"I'm heading to bed," Emily said, patting your leg over the thin blanket. "You okay out here?"

"Yeah, thanks Em. Goodnight," you said.

"Goodnight."

"Wake up honey."

Paul was gently shaking your arm. He was sitting on the edge of the couch, trying to wake you up as nicely as possible. Jared laughed in the background at how soft Paul was around you, but quickly said his goodbyes as he took the night patrol. It takes a tough guy to make fun of someone and then rush out the door. But Paul didn't care.

"Paul?" you asked, finally coming to. "What time is it?"

"Late, it's very late."

"Take me home," you said, holding your arms out to him.

"I like you when you're sleepy, you're very nice." Paul picked you up, and said a quick goodbye to Sam as you closed your eyes again. It made Sam smile.

Paul carried you to his pick up truck, and got you settled into the passenger seat. He even did up your seat belt. You woke up a little more, but your squirming and stretching was the cutest thing to him. He was so enamoured with you. He didn't really care how long it took until you trusted him. Or even if you never wanted to be with him, he didn't care. As long as he got to be around you, he would be fine.

"Let's watch a movie tonight," you said, yawning right after.

"I don't think you'll be able to stay awake," he said, smiling.

"Can we try?"

"How about we watch something tomorrow, after work?"

"Okay," you said, closing your eyes again. "Tomorrow."

You fell back asleep before you got home. Paul was driving slowly, and the cool air was filtering in through his open window. He was listening to some folk band, and the whole thing just lulled you to sleep.

When he parked the truck, he did everything he could to get you into your room without waking you up, and he was pretty successful. But as he was tucking you into bed, you woke up a little. He moved to leave but you grabbed his wrist.

"Goodnight Paul," you said, not letting go of his wrist.

"Goodnight honey," he said, daring to lean down and kiss your forehead. You made a happy sound as you rolled over, getting comfortable in bed.

Paul would've done anything in the world to crawl into bed with you and fall asleep. But he was happy just to be here.

So, Paul went back to the couch. And got as comfortable as he could, and fell asleep, reminding himself that you were safest when he was here. And that he was doing a good job protecting you.

The next morning went better than most mornings. You woke up in a good mood, and decided to make breakfast for Paul. He'd been working so hard to protect you, that he deserved at least a fraction of that devotion back.

You made the lot, pancakes and eggs. A small fruit salad and a plate of bacon. While the pot of coffee finished, Paul wandered into the kitchen stretching.

"Mmm," he groaned, "something smells good."

"I made you breakfast," you said, a smile on your face.

Paul was in love with you, that much he knew for sure. And today he got his first sign that maybe you were at least starting to fall for him too. It was a good day.

"Eat up," you said. "I have to work in a few hours."

"You're going to eat too, right?" he asked.

"Of course I am," you said, stopping before you left the room. You turned on the radio against the wall. It was some band you'd never heard of, but it was nice enough. Paul was already filling his plate, but you went to pour two coffees. "Cream, sugar?"

"Just black," he said, mouthful of food. "Just come sit."

"All right," you said. "But for the record I wanted the coffee."

You chose the chair beside him, instead of across from him, and he took note of that but didn't say anything. You smiled at him, and he smiled back, like he always did.

Breakfast was relatively quiet, you made small talk about what was going on that day, but mostly you just enjoyed the silence. It didn't feel awkward, it felt right. It felt comfortable. When you were done, Paul wasn't. So you carried your plate to the sink, and rubbed your hand across his back as you passed. His breath hitched slightly, and it made you smile, thinking about how different Paul was.

Maybe it was time you cut him a little slack.

When he finished, Paul helped you clean up. And even shooed you away to get ready for work while he did the dishes.

"Thank you," he said, as you walked back down the hallway. He wiped his hands on a dishcloth and dropped it back on the counter. He leaned back, and you couldn't help but notice how beautiful he is.

"Thank you for being here," you said, suddenly self conscience under his intent stare at you. You pulled your sweater sleeves over your hands, keeping the fabric pinched between your fingers.

"I uh, packed up the rest of the fruit salad. I thought you might like to have it at work." Paul had one of your Tupperware containers sitting on the counter.

"And the bacon?"

He looked guilty. "I ate it."

"It's okay!" you said, laughing at his face. "It was made to be eaten."

He drove you to work, and although you missed to walk, you knew you'd get back to it eventually. When he dropped you off, you hesitated to leave. Paul sat patiently, giving you a moment to collect yourself.

"I want the truth tonight," you said.

"Honey..."

"Just, think about it from my perspective. I have no idea what it is I should be scared of, I have no idea where you work or why you're gone all the time. I'm worried about you, and I'm scared."

"I'm scared too." Paul took a deep breath. "I'm scared that something will happen to you. But mostly I'm scared that if you know the truth you'll be scared of me."

"I wouldn't."

"You don't know that," he said, he looked terrified. "You hated me earlier this month. Couldn't even look at me throughout high school and I am so embarrassed about that. And it's going to be even more embarrassing when I tell you everything because then you'll know that we didn't make eye contact from two years attending the same school."

"I'm sure we made eye contact," you said.

"No." He looked at you, and you could see the pain in his eyes. "We didn't." The look on his face made you hurt. It made your heart deflate, and you would've done anything to see him smile again.

You unclicked your seat belt, but didn't move as it sprang back into place. It didn't feel right to leave the air like this.

The heat he gave off seemed to float right into your space, and there was something about his presence that made you feel more settled than you had in a long time. You wanted to touch him, so you leaned across the middle seat, and placed a tender kiss against his cheek.

"Just think about it," you said, sliding back towards the door and starting to get out. You didn't want to leave him feeling sad, but you had to get to work.

"Have a good shift," he said, watching you leave. He hated watching you walk away.

"You too."

Work had been horrible. Your boss was kind of a jerk, and waiting tables had really lost it's appeal. You'd been serving tables in La Push's best diner, but when the new owners took over, it quickly began to lose it's charm. You wanted to buy it when they were selling, but coming right out of high school you didn't have that kind of cash.

You just felt kind of miserable, so when you saw Jared and Kim waiting for you outside, you just felt annoyed. You were under the impression you and Paul had made plans.

"Hey," Kim said, smiling from the passenger seat. You got in behind Jared. "Don't worry. Paul said another hour, tops."

"Can you guys just take me home? I had a long day and I just want to relax," you asked, pulling your upper body between Jared and Kim's seats.

"I don't know, Y/N," Jared said, making a worried face. "I don't think Paul would like that."

"C'mon Jared," you said. "I'll lock the doors, and I'll call you if I get nervous."

"Jared, she wants to go home." Kim smiled at you. You really liked her.

He rolled his eyes and started the car. "When he freaks out on me, I'm throwing you both under the bus."

"He won't get mad at us," you said, "he said himself. An hour tops."

Jared and Kim were actually really great travel companions. Kim always made sure you were included in conversation, and Jared was not afraid to sing at the top of his lungs which was hilarious. They really cheered you up.

And of course, they waited until you were in your house to pull away.

Inside, you were tired, and cold. And you had wanted to spend some time with Paul. But he said an hour, and you figured we wouldn't lie about that. It wasn't too late that you couldn't give him some of the patience that he had given you.

So you spent the time bringing out some blankets, and pillows. When that was done you made some popcorn and fresh lemonade.

Paul should've been there any second. So you just spent some time tidying up the place. You saw some fabric poking out from under on the blankets, and you yanked on it, pulling out one of Paul's shirts. You laughed. Because it seemed rare to even see him in a shirt.

You pulled your shirt over your head, and put on his instead. Your shorts were hidden by his baggy shirt, even baggier on your small frame.

Twigs snapped outside the window, and you gasped. You knew you locked the door, but decided on checking the windows too. Just so you could say that you did. They were all locked. When you walked back into the living room, Paul was standing there - jaw clenched tight just like his fists were. But you could see the restraint. You could tell he was actively calming himself. You took a step closer.

"Don't," he said, voice cracking. He closed his eyes, hating the way you stop dead in your tracks. He didn't want to scare you. "I told you that I didn't want you here alone for a reason."

"I was so tired after work," you explained. "I wanted to sit on the couch and watch a movie like normal people do."

"I am trying to make things as normal as possible for you," he said, the anger was already washed away, but it wasn't gone. Not entirely. "You just have to trust me."

"How can I trust you when you don't trust me?" you said, voice starting to raise with unavoidable frustration.

"You think that I don't trust you?"

"I'm not allowed to be by myself, how else would you like me to interpret that?" You felt tears brimming at your eyes, the confrontation bringing out your anxiety.

"If we're going to fight, I need you to take three steps back."

"For what?"

"Your safety."

"What does that mean?" you shouted. "Are you scared you'll hit me?"

"I would never hit you," he shouted back. "How could you even think that?"

"I don't want to argue," you said, quietly. "I'm sorry I shouted."

He saw the sad look in your eyes, and could've kicked himself for driving you to this. He nodded, prying his eyes away from your sad ones to look anywhere else. He looked at your shirt, for the first time, and even though he was angry with you, he loved the sight. It calmed him down knowing it was you, in his shirt, a couple feet away.

He held his hand out, palm up for you to take. You did, and he guided you, as if you were dancing - not fighting, to the couch. You sat beside him, and he kept your hand in his.

"I need you to really listen to me," he said, his eyes glossing over with the realization that if he loses you, he'd never be whole again. "For now, I need you to follow all my rules. Even when they seem excessive, or dumb. And in return I will explain everything. And I won't keep any secrets from you."

"I can do that," you said. "If you're always honest with me, I'll be honest with you."

"Okay, tomorrow I'll explain everything. You're off, right?"

"Yeah," you said, shuffling over so you could lean your head against Paul's shoulder. "Can we watch our movie now?"

He put an arm around you, and you fit to him. Like you were always meant to be there. Well, technically, you were.

"Yeah, honey. We can watch a movie now."

[if you want to be added to a taglist for this story then let me know :-)]

[chefdoeuvre]

Empty Threats

Jay Halstead

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Ruzek!Reader, Adam Ruzek x Sister!Reader

Description: Best friends tell each other everything, right?

Words: 1,360

Requested: yes by anonymous; I had an idea where Adam ruzek has a younger sister (early 20s) who's a paramedic and she starts dating jay and Adam gets super overprotective when finds out a few months into the relationship but is also hurt she didn't tell him

Warnings: fluff (need I explain?), overprotective Adam, Adam being a bimbo (like usual), reader being sassy, mild language?

A/N: Jay Halstead and Adam Ruzek deserve the world. Does this count as a Jay or an Adam fic? I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors.

—

Your big brother Adam, your best friend and largest support system. He was there for you when no one else could be. To say the two of you were close would be a drastic understatement. Both of you went in the same path as first responders, him a cop with the Intelligence unit and you a paramedic at Firehouse 51. You had your respective work families that always managed to come together at Molly's after shifts. Meaning when you were introduced to the resident Intelligence hottie and Adam's work friend you immediately hit it off with him. Drinks at Molly's turned to take out at home watching the Blackhawks. Telling your brother every little thing about your life turned into keeping your best-kept secret, Jay Halstead.

The two of you had a few blissful and dare I say romantic months. You practically began staying over at his place more often than yours. Adam being the oblivious bimbo of a big brother you had, didn't notice anything that was happening between you and Jay when you all gathered for hangouts at Molly's. How could he, someone in the prestige Intelligence unit, not be able to pick up on the longing looks you and Jay shared? You would probably never know. Of course, the only people to know you and Jay were in a relationship were each other. It's not that you wanted to hide it, it was just nice to come home and have each other to yourselves.

Now the two of you were nearing the point of just wanting to come out and say it because the hiding had just become harder to do. Jay never liked to admit it but whenever you were around he was always touchy. Wanting to either keep a hand on the small of your back or your thigh or simply holding your hand. He just had to keep you in reaching distance and whenever you were around friends you had to act like you barely talked to each other outside of that bar. Jay was beginning to get fed up with the sneaking around, sure, he has to the same thing for his job but he didn't feel the need to continue doing it in his relationship. It's not like you explicitly said that the two of you had to sneak around your friends it just kind of happened that way.

Here the two of you were, sitting on Jay's couch cuddled up and watching the Blackhawks game while sipping on a beer and munching on some pizza. In all honesty, you weren't even paying attention to the game on the television. You were too busy playing with Jay's hand he had wrapped around your shoulders. Your head was resting on his chest as you listened to his heartbeat, it almost lulling you to sleep.

Breaking you out of your reverie was a knock on Jay's door. The two of you shared a confused glance before a louder knock was heard. Jay had gotten up to answer the door while you pouted at the loss of his warmth. Five minutes had passed and Jay was still standing at the door. With furrowed brows, you got up and padded toward his entryway.

"Jay, who is it?" You asked, rubbing your suddenly tired eyes.

"Was that my sister?" You heard the voice of your older brother question.

"Oh, crap." You muttered mentally facepalming as Adam pushed his way into Jay's apartment.

"Hey, big brother." You greeted him with an awkward smile as he stood in front of you with a look of disbelief.

"Out of everyone in Chicago, my sister?" Adam asked.

"I'm standing right here you know." You rolled your eyes at his overprotectiveness.

"We'll talk about this later." Adam looked pointedly at you before turning to face Jay, "you and I are going to have an important chat."

Jay stood there with an amused look on his face as he watched the younger man attempt to threaten him, an army veteran and current detective for the Intelligence unit. You stood behind the taller of the two men with crossed arms and your hip jutted out. Jay's eyes flickered over to your figure as he bit back a loud laugh. You looked just about done with this entire situation while Adam continued to drone on with empty threats.

"Adam, can you just stop?" You spoke up in annoyance.

Adam whipped his head around at the sudden sound of your voice. He caught your droopy eyes and pouted lips, ah yes the infamous puppy eyes. The baby Ruzek trademark as he'd like to call it. With his back turned to Jay the man in question smiled widely as he noticed what you were trying to do.

"No, stop that. I'm trying to be serious here." Adam argued, waving a pointed finger at your face.

"It's half past midnight, what are you even doing here?" You questioned with crossed arms.

"It's confidential information." Adam retorted.

"He was asking me advice on how to get Kim back." Jay spoke up from behind the taller man.

"Seriously?" Adam deflated and turned to Jay with a scowl.

"You couldn't have just asked him after work tomorrow?" You raised your eyebrows.

"It was a time-sensitive situation." Adam said flatly.

"Yeah, okay." You laughed unconvinced, "I'm tired, can we finish this tomorrow? I just had a double shift." You rubbed at your eyes again.

"I'll drive you home." Adam nodded as he grabbed your arm to pull to the door.

"But—" You scoffed.

"No, I'm driving you home where you can be sassy without your boy toy to help gang up on me." Adam shook his head.

"Boyfriend." You corrected.

"Whatever." Adam shrugged.

You pulled on your jacket and slipped on your shoes before turning back to Jay and placed a quick kiss on his lips, "I'll see you later." You smiled as Adam grabbed your forearm and pulled you out the door.

Eventually, the two of you pulled up to your apartment building. The entire ride there Adam was lost in his thoughts, meaning he was thinking about the fact his baby sister was dating his coworker and friend. He silently shifted in his seat to face you. You looked at him expectantly while he formulated his thoughts into words.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Adam asked, tilting his head to the side.

"It's not like I did it on purpose. It just kinda happened." You shrugged.

"But you always tell me everything. I guess not anymore." Adam scoffed.

"Adam, if this makes you feel any better you're the first one to know." You suggested hoping to get him to stop pouting.

"How long?" Adam nodded before asking.

"A few months." You answered.

"And I'm the first?" Adam questioned.

"Isn't that what I just said?" You asked.

"Fair enough." Adam nodded, "next time I don't want to walk into my sister and her boy toy though." Adam relaxed slightly.

"Boyfriend." You corrected again.

"Same difference." Adam pursed his lips.

"So we're good?" You asked hopefully.

"Yeah, as long as I get actual information from now on. And if he hurts you I won't hesitate to hurt him and make Olinsky help cover for me." Adam crossed his arms.

"All right, I'll take that." You nodded reluctantly, "just don't hurt him too bad, okay?"

"No promises." Adam laughed.

You leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you." You smiled widely.

"What can I say? I'm a great big brother." Adam shrugged nonchalantly.

You laughed before stepping out of his car to head into your apartment.

"No staying over at his place anymore!" Adam called out.

"I'm not sixteen anymore, Adam." You shook your head, "I'll do what I want."

"I swear I'm putting a tracker on you." Adam argued.

"Good luck with that, big brother. Bye!" You waved before opening the door to your building and headed in.

It's safe to say none of Adam's threats worked but Jay played it off for the sake of his sanity. It's not like Jay would hurt you anyway, he's learned from his mistakes if you could call them that.

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Coach (1)

Fandom: Dylan O'Brien

Pairing: AU Dylan x Fem!Reader

Mini series summary: Being a newly single mom of two kids wasn't exactly easy. And love wasn't exactly part of your agenda. So, should you avoid lusting over your son's baseball coach? Absolutely. But with a man like Dylan, could you really resist? Probably not.

Warnings: nothing major yet, small sexual innuendo, mentions of cheating and divorce

WC: 1.9k

A/N: a yes, to those who have been following me for a while may recognize this title, it's my old Dylan AU fic. Yes I decided to continue it. Updates will come periodically, because I write spontaneously and I cant guarantee quick updates. But I do promise I wont wait a whole year to update. And since I did some slight updates in the first 2 parts I decided to archive the old ones and repost them again. So yeah, if you've read them before great, give it another read, my writing is much better now I promise and if you're new welcome, I hope you like this mini series.

(You are here, part 2, part 3)

Dylan stood by the side of the large field, near the home plate, occasionally yelling out suggestions and pointing out mistakes to the young boys. 

"Ezra! You have to watch the ball! C'mon! I know you can do better!" He called out to the blonde boy standing on the home plate with a bat in hand. Dylan then turned his attention to the dark haired boy with the baseball mitt and ball in hand.

"Roman! What's going on, buddy? You gotta focus, alright? You gotta work on that throw!" Dylan called out to the young boy, who half nodded and sighed heavily in response.

Not long after, Dylan signaled the young boys scattered throughout the large field to gather around. He spoke some encouraging words to the boys before allowing them to disperse and gather their equipment which meant practice was over.

Your son, however, stayed behind for a minute. There was an inaudible conversation happening between Dylan and your ten year-old, Roman. You watched from the bleachers as your son made some tired gestures at his coach followed by a small pat on the back from Dylan. You couldn't help but follow them with your eyes as they made their way to the bleachers, your eyes lingering a bit too long on the brown haired coach. An action that wasn't taken lightly by the female sitting beside you.

"You're staring at him again." Your best friend, Ezra's mother, Eliza -or just Liz, commented.

"I'm not." You muttered out quickly, tearing your eyes away from the handsome coach, your mouth hanging open for a couple of seconds. "I wasn't staring." You stated matter of factly and shrugged as you looked down at the small six year-old sitting on your lap, making sure she wasn't paying attention to the conversation.

"Really? The drool coming from your mouth says otherwise." Liz playfully ran her finger across your chin, pretending to wipe away at it. You slightly glared at her, an eye roll going her way.

"I'm not drooling. I wasn't even staring." You tried to defend yourself, making a small sassy gesture to her.

"Hey, I don't blame you. If I wasn't married," she took a pause as she eyed Dylan as he removed his baseball hat to run a hand through his messy chocolate locks, you couldn't help but stare as well. "I'd jump on his bones any day."

"Hey, there's young ears present." You said quietly to Liz as not to disturb the young girl in your arms.

Despite your attempt not to, you couldn't help but allow your eyes to fall once again on the field, following the handsome male that was the topic of your conversation. You had to hide the infatuated sigh that left your lips at the sight of your son's coach running around the field, talking to the kids and picking up equipment.

"Well he is handsome, I'll give him that.." You admitted quietly, "and he's really good with the kids."

Your friend smirked slightly at your words and wiggled her eyebrows at you.

"I bet that's not the only thing he's really good at." She eyed you suggestively and slightly nudged at you with her shoulder, "You should find out what other things he's good at."

Your mouth instantly fell open and your eyes widened at the insinuation.

"Eliza! Oh, my god. Don't say that." You slightly shook your head to brush off the embarrassment and hid your face on your hands to cover the crimson on your skin.

"Mommy you're warm!" Athena, your six year-old giggled as she grabbed your warm, sweaty hands. Even your daughter noticed the nervousness that crept up on you when it came to Dylan, even if it was just the topic of him. Truth was, you had been shamelessly crushing on your son's baseball coach ever since he joined the team a couple of months ago. 

Get it together, you should not be crushing on your son's baseball coach.

"I know baby, it's just hot out here." You tried to brush it off, but the knowing smirk on Liz's face wasn't exactly helping. "Thena, why don't you go get Roman and Ezra? They're over there." You pointed to the field where Roman and Ezra were talking —or more like just Ezra was, to the other kids on the team. She quickly nodded and bolted off the bleachers, somehow not tripping over the steps as she went down. You sighed heavily the moment the young girl was far enough and slightly turned your head in Liz's direction.

"You should totally ask him out." She said out of nowhere with a shrug and a smirk on her face. Your eyes widened for the hundredth time, and you instantly shook your head frantically, the idea alone giving you a headache.

"Ask Dylan out? No way. I.. No.. That's just.. No." Your cheeks slightly heat up at the preposition. But you quickly turned it down with a vigorous shake of your head, not even giving the idea a minute to sink into your brain. "No, he's Roman's coach. It's just wrong."

"Why? I mean, you're single, and as far as I know, he's very single. Soo," she dragged the 'o' as she wiggled her eyebrows and she nudged your shoulder, pushing you over a little in a high school girl manner, "Why not get ready to mingle with the hot coach?"

"First of all, I'm technically not single, not yet." You groaned with an eyeroll. As much as you and your husband —or ex-husband or whatever were no longer living together, the divorce process had been unnecessarily long and dreadful. So as much as you wanted to be legally single, you were still married to that piece of shit. 

"And second of all, if I were to date someone, which is a big if, I can't date Roman's coach out of all people. He already has enough as it is. It'll just confuse him and probably upset him more." You sighed heavily as you looked over to the side of the field, where all the boys were having a conversation about elementary boys' things. And there you saw your son, trying, and ultimately failing at joining said conversations. And with little Athena tugging at his side, all he got from the other kids was laughing and rejection.

Seeing your son's sad and hurt expression when the other boys laughed at him or even told him to go away broke your heart. You wanted him to be happy again. You wanted him to be the energetic and loving kid he was before your waste of a husband left. Ever since Ryan —your waste of a husband left, Roman hasn't been the same. 

For the past six or so months, he has been distant and seemingly unhappy. All he ever did was lock himself up in his room and play video games. He barely ever interacted with you and Athena anymore. He barely interacted with anyone, period. Once Ryan left, it was up to you to support your kids financially. Of course, their father still paid child support, but he sure as hell didn't pay your bills or everything you needed to spend on your children. Which meant you had to take him out of the fancy school he went to in order to still pay the monthly expenses of your home. And he just didn't quite fit in at school, especially now. 

So, you hoped that him joining the baseball team would change that, that it would help him open up again and that it would help him make new friends. But so far, it's worked just the opposite.

"So, I'm making dinner tonight. Do you want to come over with the kids and get drunk? Luke will watch over the kids." Liz spoke, interrupting your train of thought.

"That sounds a-mazing," you spoke in a song-like tune, a sigh of contentment leaving your lips. "But I can't. I told Roman I'd take him to that Italian place he likes."

"Tomorrow then. I'll have that Chardonnay you love so much waiting for you." She winked at you as you both stood up, ready to greet your children.

"Thank God for your alcohol stash." You joked, flinging your arms up in praise. 

You both laughed and smiled in your children's direction, but your smile dropped as your kids and Ezra approached you. Ezra was holding Athena's hand, while Roman walked behind them, with a certain heaviness on his step and an annoyed look on his face. And Athena had a small pout on her face.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Rome doesn't want to hold my hand!" Athena whined with a pout of her lower lip. She released Ezra's hand and exchanged it for your own. Ezra going to his own mom. While Roman simply stood there, with a hand stuffed into his pockets and the other messing with the strap of his bag, his gaze stuck on the ground.

"Roman, baby," you sighed softly, not wanting to give the poor kid a hard time. You understood he didn't exactly fit in, no matter how much he wanted to, and that upset him. You didn't want to add up to that. "Your sister just wanted you to hold her hand."

"She was embarrassing me.. I'm already the kid without a dad, I don't need to be the kid with an annoying  baby sister." He muttered, his gaze not once leaving the ground.

 His words were harsh, but lacked emotion. And it broke your heart. But as much as you wanted to tell him that it wasn't true, that he did have a dad, you'd be lying if you did. Ryan was already absent in your children's lives before the split, but at the same time he was there, and Roman felt as if he was. But now, his father really wasn't there, at all. And there was nothing you could do about it.

You sighed softly, gesturing your free hand out for him, "Roman, come here," a heavy sigh left the young boy's lips as he took a few steps closer, standing in front of you with his head hanging low and his eyes stuck to the ground. You used your hand to hold the side of his face, his eyes meeting with your own. "Baby, Thena just wanted to show you that she loves you. She didn't mean to embarrass you, right Thena?" You turned your attention to the small girl that hid behind your arm, her eyes glistening with tears.

The small girl sniffled and shook her head, "No.. I'm sorry Rome.. I won't do it ever again, I-I promise."

You exchanged looks between your children, your eyes finally landing on Roman as you waited for a response. You raised an eyebrow at him, your eyes speaking a silent 'and' to the boy. He eventually signed, almost too heavily, and nodded. 

"It's okay, I guess.. I don't really mind all that much." He half smiled, shrugging slightly.

Athena's expression quickly lightened, the small girl detached herself from your hand and hugged her older brother. And as much as he hated to admit it, he didn't mind the affection. He returned the hug and smiled, for a moment at least.

After a second or two, Roman slightly pushed Athena off him, signaling that that had been enough affection for a day. You breathed out softly, turning to look at Liz, who gave you a sympathetic smile in response. 

"Well my loves, off we go. Say goodbye to Auntie Liz and Ezra." Both your children did as you said. Athena hugging both of them, and Roman simply waving at them. Good enough.

And at last, you gave Liz a quick but tight hug, "I'll call you tomorrow." You said shortly before you grabbed a hold of your daughter's hand and your son's bag, and eventually parted ways.

Today was gonna be a long day.

《Here's an edited version of part 1. As always I hope y'all enjoyed it. I'm trying to get back into writing after a long year, hopefully this will help me get back on track. Let me know your thoughts. And let me know if you'd like to be added to my dylan/coach taglist which I do have》