#I'M LEGIT CRYING RN STOP
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I'M CRYING STFU OH MY GOD
#I'M LEGIT CRYING RN STOP#THIS CAME OUTTA NOWHERE#STOP.#jurdan#cardan greenbriar#the cruel prince#the wicked king#the queen of nothing#how the king of elfhame learned to hate stories#the folk of the air#jude x cardan#holly black
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Unfortunately.
How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.
#i would be grateful if anybody can unalive me rn thank you thank you oh god#10 years old to now. Legit cant stop myself crying every time i wake up#I'm 15
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I’m on my period and my cramps are kiiiilling me. Like legit so bad I threw up. And ofc I can’t stop thinking about nerdy!peter, and how much better he would make me feel rn:((((
So if you have the time, I would really like to request a blurb of nerdy!peter taking care of reader that has a more intense period lol<3
(ALSO I need to say that I love you so much!! And I literally read everything you write hehe. Thank you for feeding my tasm addiction!! <33)
*cleaning out my inbox.*
this but you're also not trying to make him feel bad so you're trying to hide it but peter keeps noticing you wincing or awkwardly shifting and he knows it was a planned meet up but:
'do you want me to leave?'
'huh?' you sit straighter and ignore a stab in your lower stomach. peter doesn't sound the least bit offended either. 'you seem a little off. if you don't want to hang out today we can do something tomorrow?'
no, you can't lose your only lifeline. 'i want you here, i promise.' peter knows you get a period but you haven't really talked about it and you're not about to start crying to him over cramps and a headache.
'then are you feeling okay?' the back of peter's hand rests on your forehead, the light touch has your shoulders releasing unnoticed tension. 'no. yeah. sorry, yes.'
peter has an amused look, 'care to explain, ma'am?' a pretend microphone is held under your chin. you lean into it, 'tummy hurts.'
your boyfriend acts like he's been shot. 'my girl is hurting on my watch, i've failed.' then looks up at you from your bed, 'what can i do? do you need a snack, or a sprite? what about chocolate, don't girls like that when they're on their period?'
you freeze, 'period?' peter's eyes widen, he might've just messed up big time. sitting up, he does his best to not make it worse. 'i'm so sorry, i thought you were on your period but i should never make that assumption. i'm sorry, i love you and i am ready to repent.'
shifting and tugging at your sweater you look at the ground, you feel a little embarrassed. 'why do you think i'm on my period? have i been mean or something?'
peter coos and shakes his head while tugging you halfway over his lap. 'you're never mean to me, why else would i call you my sweetheart, hm?' peter softly cups your face and pouts. 'i said that because you always have a tummy ache this time of the month. and maybe a little hangry.' another breath, 'you also cry more.'
he knows you better than you thought. 'you picked up on all that?' it's a little warming, he notices everything. peter scoffs at the assumption that you thought he wouldn't. 'it took a couple months. i said something to may one day and she looked at me and said something like 'c'mon, peter. put two and two together and get her some chocolate.' so i brought you m&m's and you cried. so, yeah, i kinda figured it out then.'
you remember it. peter showed up and said he stopped for something at a corner store and saw them by the register and thought you'd like them. the memory sends tears stinging at your eyes. 'it was just so nice. you thought of me and spent money on me.'
peter laughs a little, 'i did.' you nod, as if his answer explained your tears. 'peter?' he lights up, 'yeah?' you give him puppy dog eyes, you're praying for his sympathy. 'i have cramps and they really hurt.'
it's all you needed to say for peter to jump into action, for a moment you regret not saying anything sooner. you've been missing out on cuddles and forehead kisses and unwavering attention. 'my poor baby. what do you need from me?'
#i'm so sorry guys- i just haven't liked anything i've written recently and i don't know why#i miss you all#nerdy!peter
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I don't really know exactly why I'm posting this, I guess I just want to share my joy, but y'all...the nerve block worked. My migraine went down a little over the night so I was only at like a 1.5-2 but I swear to god the second they were done EVERY SINGLE PART of my head stopped hurting. The only pain I'm feeling rn is at the injection site and a smidge in my jaw, but that's not a huge deal bcs I know the steroids take a long time to do their thing and I usually have pain around the injection site when they do this in my back, plus I did already suspect something like 10% of my migraines aren't entirely due to my neck, but like...it worked. It fucking worked.
I've been living with chronic migraines my entire life, and in the last five years, they've gotten so bad that I can't work and have to cancel streams and hangouts with friends all the time. I have migraines more days than I don't and I've never been able to find out what my trigger is aside from not sleeping well and eating lays potato chips(rip I miss them so much) or gluten or being on my period?? and on some days I'm in so much pain I can't even feed myself or shower. 8-10 is the norm, they don't go lower on their own, they NEVER go away on their own, no matter how much time I spend lying in bed in the dark with icepacks on my face. My migraine rescue meds don't always work, or they work for a day and then it comes back, and I seem to be fucking Immune(tm) to Excedrin and ibuprofen. All that together has legit been ruining my entire life.
And I am not even a little ashamed to admit that once they were done and asked how I felt I broke down sobbing in the exam room because it WORKED. Instantly. Years of pain and agony and no help from my doctors, of blaming a medical condition that treatment hasn't fixed, telling me to limit screen time and lose weight, forcing me to try 50 different medications none of which help, of spending long nights in the ER hoping they can fix me even though it's typically a 50/50 chance....and now it's over. I don't have to do that anymore. They fixed it. They fixed it.
I'm crying right now as I write this. I never thought this was possible. Like I believed that it was my neck and my doctors agreed, but I was so worried that this would all be for nothing, I didn't think it would work, I know most disabled people dream of finding the One Thing that's causing all their problems even though most of us never do, but I guess luck decided to smile on me this day, this is what's causing my problems and it's treatable. It's over. I found the path out of this hell and it was the right one. I don't even know what to do, what to say. I'm so happy I can't even be happy, all I can do is cry because the hardest part is over.
There's still work to be done, but the path is clear. And honestly @ any gods that are listening, please grant this to my fellow disabled people. They deserve to feel this, we all do.
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Spencer Reid x Famous!Reader
Synopsis: After your home is broken into by a stalker, your bf cheats, the FBI is called, and a new romance begins to take over.
Told through Instagram posts.
TW for mentions of stalkers
Part 1. Part 2.
yourinstagram


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yourinstagram 🖤🤍 NYC I love you so much
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rarebeauty 😍😍
dovecameron You are the most beautiful human
Liked by yourinstagram
tchalamet A devine being 💫
florencepugh ❤️❤️❤️
y/n.is.queen I MISSED YOUR SMILE!
woketh.teen She looks so happy to be back on stage
and.what. The crowd went CRAZAY. The energy was unbelievable! So happy I was there!!!!!!
y/n.gossip That group hug tho 🥹
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yourname.stan

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yourname.stan SHE'S BACK! 😭😭😭😭
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kiki.kiwi The way they all held hands at the start of the show killed me. I cried so much.
nerdymcnerd No. But I swear I saw that FBI agent dancing to her songs!!!
dracoandme PICS WHERE?!?!?!
y/ns.army I need to see this!!!
onabreak The romance is BLOOMING
pgarcia @theemilyprentis 👀
y/n.updates


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y/n.updates YOU GUYS!!! Y/N JUST POSTED THIS ON HER IG STORY THIS MORNING 😍😍
Story reads "☀️Sunshine☀️ and Road tripping with my new friend. Meet Spencer."
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sasha.mac She is a Goddess!! A Queen!! 👑
gucci.goddess He legit looks like a Spencer 🤣
fanfic.reader I smell romance in the air 💕💕
jd.dj He's her FBI body guard. Stop.
ooh.bratz Can he be mine next😭😍
bye-felicia THOSE HANDS 🤩
carter.nation Took no time did she 🤣
_isla Matt literally cheated on her. You can't say shit.
bubbles It's sad she can't just be her own person and be single. You don't need a man girl. Chill.
lame-o She can do what she wants??
celebgossip

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celebgossip During Y/n's show tonight, her third show back since her temporary shock hiatus, the star broke down in tears while singing Almost is Never Enough. During which the crowd came together and sang the rest of the song for her.
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itsmemario She must be feeling so much pain right now but I hope she feels comforted by her fans being there for her
y/ns.army I watched the video and when she sang So close to being in love. Her voice cracked and she tried to power through but she just broke down 💔💔
keyboardwarrior Why did she come back if she was just gonna cry for 90% of her show? Waste of money. Waste of time. Get yourself sorted and then come back.
ryanslife Your mum must be proud.
gigglegiraffe She's allowed to have feelings?
hater482 Exactly. Imagine going to a concert and they're just crying. Just don't sing that song?
daydreamer She sings love songs dipshit
y/nfan I just want to hug her so bad 😭
y/nupdates
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y/nupdates Y/n posted these to her story 10mins ago!! She's spoiling us. She's writing new songs. Going out. And having fun with her FBI agent Spencer.
y/nfan WHOOOOOS BUYING HER FLOWERS?!
bi.bi.bi Herself?
freakygirl Imagine if it was the stalker?!
queenie.me Doubt it. They probably check her mail and shid.
spillthetea Maybe Spencer? 👀
enews

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enews BREAKING‼️ Dash cam footage was leaked today showing FBI agents arresting a man outside Y/n's New York apartment.
We've reached out to the BAU team and Y/n's management for comment.
y/n.updates OMG THEY GOT HIM!!!
bi.bianca Thank GOD!!! She can breathe now 😭
queenie.me Those agents saved her GOD damn life. 😭
y/nnnnn I'm so happy rn. She's safe ❤️
imdreaming Sending so many prayers to her 🙏🏼
vampdiary Spencer I'd HAWT ngl
thirstay Girl literally!!!
freeshavocadoo The way he swerved him too. That agent got rizz.
yourinstagram

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yourinstagram the light inside my universe now
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dr.s.reid

Liked by emilyprentiss, yourinstagram and 12 others
dr.s.reid 🩷
p.garcia The CUTEST 😭🥰 so glad it's Official!!!
dr.s.reid She is and so am I.
emilyprentiss @p.garcia I told you!!
p.garcia I just couldn't believe!!
derekmorgan Pretty Boy got gameee
jen.jarau Spence I'm so happy for you!!
#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x famous!reader#famous!reader
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I'm literally about to cry. I'm not okay at all, and I need to talk to someone but I don't want to both the people I love with a stupid evening anxiety attack. It's gonna pass. But rn I'm clawing at my scars and I wanna cry so so so so badly but I legit don't know how. If you're one of my beloved moots, I'm gonna be straight with ya I can't mentally handle talking with any of yall about this, so know I love you even if I don't respond to whatever you say rn.
Im hanging by a thread stopping myself from doing things that aren't good for me. And to make matters worse, the second my family gets home I'm gonna break. I can't deal with them constantly talking to me and telling me what to do, asking me for favors and all that. It's all such a small thing, I'm just being dramatic about the stress. That's it, I swear- so why don't I believe it?
Im fine.
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I started coughing violently in the middle of the technology exam cause I'm sick and everyone was silent and I spent like legit 20 minutes coughing no matter how much I tried to stop it and people looked at me weird. I want to cry rn.
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𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗘 𝗣𝗘𝗢𝗣𝗟𝗘 𝗜'𝗗 𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘 𝗧𝗢 𝗚𝗘𝗧 𝗧𝗢 𝗞𝗡𝗢𝗪 𝗕𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗘𝗥
alright, i'm usually so slow and/or lazy when it comes to tag games, but this is a short, sweet one lol thank you @msnanu!! <3
────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──
𝗟𝗔𝗦𝗧 𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗚 | "welcome to the other side" by dpr ian, do you see that it's become a problem? i've been having a hard time listening to anything/anybody else rn lol
𝗙𝗔𝗩 𝗖𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗥 | any and every shade of blue, forever <3
𝗖𝗨𝗥𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗟𝗬 𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚 | rewatching legend of korra and alice in borderland ^^
𝗦𝗣𝗜𝗖𝗬/𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧/𝗦𝗔𝗩𝗢𝗥𝗬 | depends? but i'd say spicy > sweet > savory. rn i'd love some sundubu jjigae hahaha
𝗥𝗘𝗟𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗣 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗧𝗨𝗦 | 😁😁😁 WELLLL :D
𝗖𝗨𝗥𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗢𝗕𝗦𝗘𝗦𝗦𝗜𝗢𝗡 | dpr ian, christian yu, barom my man my one and only, i will never stop crying about him anymore i fear :') pls send christian yu boyfriend pics/memes, you'll get a kiss, thank you <3
tagginggggg uhhh… @btsmosphere @moccahobi @wintaerbaer @jeonstudios @youtifulhobi @kimtaegis @/legit can't think of more bc brain fried but if you wanna do it, pls do :') <3
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D-Day is an absolute masterpiece; let's discuss.
Obscenely long description of each of the songs under the cut
TL;DR: I'm an emotional wreck and this is the best album I've ever heard for so many reasons.
Haegeum??? That MV??? Never wanted to quit my job and start a gang that bullied the rich and steals their money more in my life (and trust me, that's something I've wanted to do since I was like 13). Yoongi is the only rich man I'd ever let lecture me about capitalism. He can do it all day every day. This is a fucked system, but thank you for turning me on while lecturing me about it and murdering people with some dirty chopsticks 🥴
D-Day is absolutely sick, 100% exactly what I'd expect from him. How a song can go so hard and still be so poetic to me is just insane. The beat is SICKENING. The chorus? CATCHY. 10/10 song, perfect opener to the album and set's the tone for the rest that's coming in an amazing way.
HUH?! killed me. We open the song with "what the shit do you know about me" and bro? Nothing, ion know shit about fuck, but you got me all the way fucked up with that attitude. Hoseok?? THE "HUH"S EVERYWHERE?? dead. deceased. The beat? Would literally sell my soul to be able to be in the studio when that man makes anything. I went to school to be an audio engineer, I've seen the way people put music together and create these catchy ass beats and have even made a few of my own, but FUCK BRO THERE'S NOTHING BETTER THAN THIS MAN IN THE STUDIO.
^^That goes for every song, not just Huh, but I just thought that it was important for EVERYONE to know that I'd sacrifice my firstborn child just to watch this man work.
AMYGDALA had me in tears. I was literally sobbing reading the lyrics. There are no words I can say that will accurately express how I feel about this song. This song has been out for less than 24 hours and I already feel so close to it, I can't even begin to describe it. The way most of the instruments fall out in the pre-chorus just so they can all come back in the chorus for that intensity with him basically yelling the lyrics is just *chef's kiss*.
SDL Is so cute and heartbreaking at the same time. The chorus is everything, so beautiful. Talk about bitter sweet lyrics, I'm eating that shit up. His vocals are absolutely outstanding, that "I'm thinking 'bout you" is making me so delulu you have no idea.
People Pt. 2 has already been out, but man that song is gorgeous. IU's vocals are such a great contrast to Yoongi's rap, and when they harmonize I wanna start crying whY DO THEY SOUND SO GOOD??!
I'M NOT KIDDING YOU WHEN I SAY I WAS CRYING, LEGIT SOBBING THE FIRST TIME I HEARD POLAR NIGHT. The instrumental is so uniquely Yoongi, and makes you feel so much. Yoongi is one of the only artists whos music makes me feel what they feel; and this song is the best representation of that. Everytime i listen to it I have to stop myself from crying and it has nothing to do with the lyrics. I cried before I even knew what the song was about, just because that's how good of a composer and producer he is. Genuinly one of the best songs I've ever heard.
I've never had an interlude make me feel so much. He's perfected the art of making his music invoke the emotions of his listeners and there's nothing more perfect than a minute-and-a-half-long interlude with no words in it that's still able to do that. Incredible.
Snooze is honestly one of the best thing's to have ever graced this planet if i'm being 100% rn. I know I keep talking about the emotion of the music but broooo. And the Woosung feature? His voice is amazing and is already so raw and emotional and paired with this song I just cannot. The lyrics make me want to sob, which I will probably do later when I get off work. And the the reference back to So Far Away? I'm on the floor someone please hug me.
Yoongi's vocals go fucking crazy in Life Goes On. If this was my introduction to Yoongi I would 100% believe that he's a singer and has been his whole life. The pure raw talent of this man will never cease to amaze me.
In conclusion, I love Min Yoongi with my whole chest and I hope he knows how much his music helps people, because it really, really helps. I can never even fully express just how this album alone helps me, that's not even speaking about all his other solo projects and the hundreds of songs he's worked on throughout his career.
If you read all of that I love u and I hope u have a spectacular day.
#D-Day#Yoongi#Min yoongi#agust d#suga#he pours his heart and soul into every track#or maybe it's just crack#idk#but either way#I will never get over this album#crying sobbing throwing up#haegeum#life goes on#snooze#polar night#interlude: dawn#Amygdala#people pt.2#huh?!#SDL
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Hey,
Bells here,
Since I saw you’re having a hard time I just wanna let you know some things,
I’ll always be here if you ever need to talk, no pressure of course, make sure to stay healthy (or at least try), try and get some sleep, and most importantly don’t stop loving yourself because your an amazing and kind person ♥︎
Almost everyone (including me) loves and appreciates you romantically or platonically (mainly platonically) but in the end, we all care for you like a family, we’re in this together, all of us. Stay safe and remember we’re always here if you ever need to vent or just chat.
Take as long as you need to heal, just stay alive and remember we’re all here for you, if you ever feel lonely I’m here.
I’m so sorry you’re going through a hard time but I hope you feel better soon ♥︎
you legit made me cry bro omfg you are actually so kind
this means the world to me and I have no words <3
im laying in my bed sobbing (happy tears this time promise) because of u
this is just so kind you all are the highlight of my day actually thank you so much <333
im here if you ever need anything too, don't be afraid to reach out just cause I struggle too
(also I'm gonna answer that "anons" ask about mitski rn too)
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Totally different vibe but I'm gay and thinking so much about him. This post might get nsfw, folks.
I'm smitten. Sure we have our problems, I mean, of course we do, he's dating ME- But FUCK, man. It's like how I felt with Alex except Victor is a good person who actually loves me. He's way stronger than me, which makes me SHAKE bro. He could hurt me if he wanted to, but he's so nice. He calls me things that have me on my fucking knees.
Like. Hooooly shit I can't wait til I get a chance to meet him in person bc when I say I'm gonna do whatever he wants... I MEAN WHATEVER. Like. I will be incapable of saying no. I will be pathetic.
Imagine if we meet in a bar and I get super drunk and kiss him dude that- HGJDHDBFHFHD.
I want him. I want him ON ME. I legit- like. I'm acespec, sex repulses me, the thought of being touched is so scary, but like I'd let him be all over me if he actually wanted me. I'd let him do ANYTHING.
I am so fucking attracted to this guy, and we have so much in common that some days we do nothing but play video games for literally the whole day together... We play almost every night and he puts up with my drunk nonsense, he doesn't complain <333
I wish I could tell him about the shit I'm into bc the only way this could get better is if I get proper dominated man I'm- I'm weak, I'm small, I like hiding behind people and letting them make all the decisions. I'm a dog for this man. I'm property.
FUCK I am drunk rn and if any of my friends find this I'm going to be humiliated beyond belief, they don't-
Nobody knows how much I want this man to fuck me and it weighs heavy, like, I don't even think he knows how I'd kill for him to both absolutely wreck me AND baby me.
Bc on one hand. I'm a little baby. I'm pure. I'm innocent. Treat me like a little goober and hold me and. IDK FUCK MAYBE I JUST HAVE DADDY ISSUES BC I THINK IM ASKING FOR A DILF-
... but on the other hand, I'm a bad person, I'm the worst, I'm whatever villain you need me to be just PLEASE put me in my fucking place I *WANT* you to punish me I'm like literally asking for it, I'm doing shit that gets on ur nerves bc I wanna be RAILED man I WOULD BE SO MUCH LESS ANNOYING IF YOUD JUST SLAM ME AGAINST THE WALL AND BREAK ME WHEN IM A LITTLE BITCH
HhHh.
I still can't believe I'm saying all this shit
I'm beyond wasted. Like. Intoxicated moreso than usual. Typing this so far has taken an HOUR and I got sad halfway through out of humiliation and went to write that first post. But even through all the drinking, all I can really think about is being pinned to his bed 👉👈,,,
,,, it's not just sex either bc I want kisses. Neck kisses. Like. Damn. I want him to hold me from behind. I want to cling to him. Hide my face against him. If he touched my face I would do the fucking meme thing and refuse to let go of his hand. I want to snuggle against him and just. Disappear for a while.
.... I want to cry myself to sleep in *his arms* instead of on my own. I hug my pillows and try desperately to pretend they're him. I see him when I fall asleep, when I'm alone, when I'm sad... when I'm fucking suicidal the thing that stops me is that then I'd have to wait who KNOWS how long for him to live out his own life, and that I might have to watch him fall in love with someone else (the worst thing ever)
If. If I ever lost him idk what I'd do because fuck dude. He's everything. Victor is my world. I want to meet him.
.... I also want him to control every aspect of my life and tell me what to do bc without guidance I drown. Ppl might think it'd be toxic, but I think I need that in my life. I hate making decisions. I want to sit quietly and let him think, bc I'm bad at thinking, and thinking overwhelms me. I want him to hide me behind him and be the one to handle the world so that I can just be *his.*
UGH. THIS IS THE HORNIEST, SAPPIEST FUCKING POST IVE EVER MADE EVER.
#felix kranken is real but hes an 18 year old fat transmasc kid sorry guys#Rambling about my hot ass boyfriend#vent post#drunk posting#vent#lgbtq relationships#embarassing
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I'm legit crying rn. Shadowheart and Astarion didn't follow me onto the elevator so i rode it back down to get them and i guess Shadowheart was standing under it. I can't stop laughing.
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I'm so depressed rn about dating/marriage/the future, literally cried yesterday, I just don't think its going to happen. I'm not going to ask a guy out because I don't have the confidence for that and if he said yes it would always be in the back of my head that he's just settling for me cuz if he wanted me he'd have asked. I've never even been on a date, ever! Didn't even go to my own senior prom cuz I didn't wanna have to sit alone all night lol
Recently I was texting a guy and he was so sweet and gentlemanly but I totally ruined that. He came into my work to use our services and I freaked out and started telling my colleague that I wish he wouldn't come here and like why is he here and stressing about him being there. And I'm pretty sure he overheard and doesn't understand that I didn't actually mean any of that I just have an anxiety disorder and freaked out. Then my colleague started laughing about an older man who asked me out (he was 65 wth!) And I think other actually nice guy thinks we were laughing about him.
Now at work his entire demeanor has changed he seems so down and he legit glares at me when saying goodbye on the way out (my desk is by the door) So being at work is depressing because all I can think about at work is how this man was actually so sweet and so nice to me and I with my big mouth and idiot anxiety just disrespected him so much and clearly hurt his feelings which he didn't deserve. And I don't wanna try to talk to him about it because we don't really know each other that well and what am I supposed to say 'hey did you hear me talking about you and about how I want you to go away-yeah I didn't mean that it was just anxiety pls don't be upset-like wth I can't do that
Now I'm gonna pray every morning for God to keep my words so I don't be so damn stupid. I'm just really upset that I upset someone like that regardless of possible dating I don't even care I just care that I was inadvertently so mean like what kind of bullshit high school level behaviour was that ffs
Btw this is the anon from sotwk-I saw your comment and totally relate like its nice to know I'm not alone and others deal with this too but at the same time it's depressing as hell that this many people are having this problem, like it just reinforces the hopelessness. I feel like I'm sitting in a waiting room waiting for something that will never happen but I cant get out of the waiting room because I really want the thing y'know?
Apologies for the entire ass rant, I'm just so mad at myself rn
Hey anon! I'm really sorry you're going through all this. Giving advice isn't my strong suit, but I definitely understand the "sitting in a waiting room" feeling, and it sucks.
I spent a good chunk of my 20s like that, feeling stuck and alone and unable to stop crying or shake off my self-loathing. I was trapped waiting for things that would never happen and I was powerless to change that.
No, things aren't perfect now, and yes, I'm still very single, but the good news is I did manage to escape the "waiting room" feeling. It still creeps up every now and again, but I'm better able to recognize and fight it.
The first step was realizing I was depressed. Oh my GOD was I depressed. It feels ridiculous that I didn't notice at the time, but it had been creeping up on me so slowly that at some point it just became my new normal to cry multiple times a week. I was lethargic and detached and utterly convinced to the very core of my being that something was fundamentally wrong with me, and that I would never be loved and my whole life would pass me by with that same horrible sense of waiting. (I don't want to sit here giving armchair diagnoses or pretending to know all the details of your life, but it certainly looks to me like you have depression too.)
When I turned 30 it felt like a wake-up call- it's a new decade and something needs to change. The thought of my 30s slipping by just like a good chunk of my 20s really scared me.
So the second step for me was therapy. I don't know if you're in therapy now, or tried it and it didn't work, or if it's an option for you financially, but if you can give it a try, I really do think it will help. I can tell you're desperate to get all this off your chest and get answers and validation, and a good therapist will help with that way more than a tumblr ask box will! My therapist also connected me with a psychiatrist, because wow does medicine also help. It took some trial and error, but between the right meds and the right people to talk to, things really did improve.
It's hard, but I'm doing my best to try new things- new hobbies, social groups, clubs, anything- because I want to meet new people and have more meaning in my life. The disgusting cocktail of depression, anxiety, and executive dysfunction were keeping me from doing much of anything besides work and scrolling the internet, and that really intensified the feeling of being stuck in a waiting room, watching other people's lives move forward while i was sitting still. But being more active socially, trying new hobbies, even just being outside of my apartment more often, is giving me back some control. I even took an impromptu trip to Iceland, alone, and I could practically hear myself slamming the door of the waiting room behind me as I left!
I know none of the above rambling had anything to do with finding love, but personally, I kind of needed to take all of those steps before I could focus on anything else. And it wasn't that I "needed to stop looking for love and focus on other things, and love will come when you least expect it" - it was that if I didn't try to bring more meaning into my life, my depression was never going to get better.
And it wasn't that I "needed to love myself first or no one will ever love me" - it was that I had been spiraling for years and could hardly function if I didn't focus on my mental health. (So...maybe all that cliche advice isn't wrong. It's just usually not framed right.)
Because that's the thing- you're not unlovable or doomed to be alone or secretly fundamentally flawed or anything else your brain is telling you right now. What you are is a good person worthy of love and respect whose anxiety and depression are doing their best to get the better of her. They're in that waiting room with you, barring the door shut and telling you it's your fault, and you need to use any tools you can (therapy, medicine, guidance counseling, meditation, anything) to shut them up and kick the door down. Love isn't in that waiting room- it never was. It's beyond the door, in the real world, where you have agency and aren't powerless to change things.
Beyond dragging a waiting room metaphor way too far, I don't have much more advice, especially as far as romance goes. My own love life is nonexistent- I'm probably not the best person to get help from!
It sounds like you might be feeling too much anxiety to try dating apps, or you might not like the idea of them. And tbh I hate them too, but I bring them up because that was how I got my first real date at 24, as well as 99% of the other dates I've been on since. Even if the date sucks, it makes dating as a concept feel a bit less daunting- it's no longer this Big Significant Achievement, it's just a thing you've done before.
Anyway, I'm not sure if any of this very long response will help or not, but feel free to send me a message if you want to talk more. I'm wishing you all the best and am confident that things will get better!
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I literally just ate food. I was doing good, I felt okay. Why is my stomach now upset and I feel like im gonna throw up?? I'm legit breaking into a sweat rn. I didn't even eat anything weird or could've gotten food poisoning. Stop being a lil bitch, body istg 😭
(I sound angry, but I'm actually pouting and feel like whining and crying and being cuddled while I'm in pain. I hate stomach aches :(( )
#fucking end me dude#stomach aches are for bitches#and i am a bitch#dear god(s)/goddess(es) please spare me from my mortal suffering#my tummy ache :((
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hello!!! just stopping by to let you know that your tags literally made me cry;;; like how dare you!!! 😭💕 they honestly made my heckin day and meant so much!! Thank you!!💕 Also wanted to add that I started reading your Destiny Bond comic and omg im obsessed with it;;; AAAAA ITS SO GOOD!! 💕 I can’t wait for the next update of it!! Your art is really cute and your writing is fantastic!! 💕✨
OH MY GOD?????????????????????????????

I'M BEING FR WHEN I SAY THAT MY BRAIN SHORT-CURCUITED SEEING YOU IN MY INBOX OH MY GOD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Thank you so much for the kind words oh my god I'm still so overwhelmed rn I'm gonna sound like a mess for a moment hang on hang on /vpos
I MEANT EVERY TAG !!! Your art is absolutely lovely and it just brings me so much joy and I literally yelled Out Loud seeing this !!!!!!! The world deserves to see how beautiful and wholesome and warm and sweet this piece is !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ✨✨✨✨✨
AND I WAS LIKE OMG HANG ON is that A Cool Artist I Follow suddenly liking my comic parts What W h a t wHAT'S HAPPENING
I'm so flattered aaaaaaaaa that very first part of Destiny Bond was honest to god just a prompt I had stuck in my head (hence it being so rough, looking back on it skdjfsnfs) and then after seeing all the positive response to it from friends I decided to turn it into a little passion project of mine and have a full storyline written out for it, like it legit spiraled into this whole thing and I Have No Idea how I'm gonna pull all of this off (especially with what I have planned) BUT I AIM TO! I SHALL TRY MY BEST!!! BECAUSE THIS IS A STORY I WANNA TELL ABOUT OUR BELOVED MYSTICS!!!!!!!! 😭😭😭💖💖💖
I aim for an update every Sunday or so (I have this lil routine where I relax n do art in my fave cafe on that day so I felt it was fitting hehe) unless stated otherwise or I drown in college/freelance work ueueue but yaaa
Thank u again I shall bury myself underground nows 👍👍👍👍👍
#aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#sacredshipping#morty/eusine#morty x eusine#fluff speaks !!!
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Hey.. this isn't really an ask btw.. just feeling really bummed out about the RT scores (re: TCR) cause despite the fact that his acting is being praised and isn't the issue with the critics, that's still going to be the narrative. (Their issues seem to be be writing/pacing).. still going to watch it cause i love mystery/thrillers but i haaatttee that this is going to add fuel to the "Tom can't act" nonsense. It's so infuriating. I'm legit crying in my room rn... Like, he's actually a really good actor: Cherry, TDATT, Uncharted.. whatever anyone's issues with those projects, his acting was always solid.. Is this like going to be a thing? His projects getting unfairly graded and ppl using Marvel/superhero label as a reason to doubt his talent..
Sorry if i sound unhinged btw.. I'm just so freaking frustrated and sad... I'd love this project to succeed so ppl can stop underestimating him.
Okay girl, I don't mean this in a snarky way, but I think you need to take a few deep breaths in..... and take a few deep breaths out..... 🧘🏾♀️
Repeat After Me:
This series has not come out yet
I will watch it and form my own opinion
No matter WHAT the final reviews are, Tom is going to be OKAY
I think you all have to remember that most people haven't watched this series yet.
Why not wait and watch all 10 episodes first BEFORE having a mental breakdown just because a few measly critics didn't give it glowing reviews? 🥴
Bottom Line: Tom is going to be just fine. He is a white, straight, good-looking male in Hollywood.
Believe me y'all.... Tom is going to be OKAY.😅
If he wanted to quit acting completely tomorrow, he already has enough in the bank to tie him over and retire lol 😆
I suggest you read the loads of POSITIVE reviews that Tom and this series is getting, which I posted yesterday.
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