#I'M BACK AT IT PEOPLE

[drifting-pieces-blog-blog]

Masking in the Duat

Or: Unmasking Marc Spector.

The biggest difference we are meant to see between Marc and Steven is the fact that Steven is so open and expressive. When we first meet Marc, he is glaring, stone faced, and so stiff. He is a rock and Steven is water.

In reality, Marc is sand. Slowly breaking down beneath the brutal winds that have been beating at him all his life.

As the show progresses, we see Marc have little breakthroughs of exasperation, irritation, stress, and anger. An eye roll, a twitch of the lips, and pulling away to reset.

We see his exhausted and extreme control to control everything about his emotions. We see him fidget. We see his fingers twitch. We see him sigh and run his hands over his hair.

Ticks or someone that has been taught not to stim. Not to draw attention. Not to show weakness.

When he was younger, he probably bounced his legs till he was chastised to stop. He probably would vocal stim till he was told his voice was too much. He probably excitedly flapped his hands over his favorite show until he started to get hit.

This right here? This is a reset. A lapse in control that he catches and controls. We see it the most around Layla.

The peaks behind the curtain. The way she moves her hands when he starts to close in on himself. His hands are together pressed so tightly in on himself. Look at the way she moves to touch his fingers rather than holding him still or clasping his hands into a cage. She does this while watching his face so intently. She knows. She is opening him up, encouraging him to stim. To touch her fingers. To move.

Even here, when we first see him, cold and trying his best to be intimidating while frustrated. He knows he fucked up here. He knows he fucked up real bad and he isn't smart enough to fix it.

It's the way he settles into that spot. The shift. It's a small shift in feet. A shift from someone that used to walk a little differently. Someone used to the off balance and toe step. A step that has been drilled out of them.

Even just his eyes, intimidating, but honestly a stare that is locked and scared. Look at his arms slowly settle into that "standing man" position he's so good at. He's halfway debating on trying to pretend to be Steven. You can see it in the way his face shifts JUST the smallest bit around the jaw.

Even here. He's in so much pain physically and emotionally. His lips are SO pulled tight. He's probably been tortured before. Used to pain. Used to being hit. Used to hiding how much something hurts. He's breathing through it and rembering his training.

But he's tired and his system stability has been compromised by this point and he's been fighting Steven up to this point (and probably Jake who probably has thoughts about this situation).

The way he goes from full grimace to exhale to a perfectly calm face. He knows how to mask to the extreme.

So what is this? And of course....

Marc is unable to mask in the Duat. Not just because of the extreme stress he is under or the fact that he is dead.

I have a few theories on why:

Being dead, he has no body and has lost the fine control he has gained over the years. Before he could feel the need to express himself and his muscles would shut it down automatically. A sort of self preservation and natural response he has honed over the years.

This of course means that in their head space, he is also unable to mask. Remember the first time he spoke to Steven? The frustration in his voice as he demanded that Steven stop looking? Even when he's seen in the reflections, you see more of Marc's expressions than when he has the body.

2. He is being judged on the boat and being prevented from masking. The duat is seeing his true self to balance on the scales. All those who pass through, might lose the ability to hide themselves. Those who are evil are more evil and easy to see. So here, Marc's true feelings are exposed. His worries, his frustrations, his confusion, his utter reliance on Steven to tend to his emotional state.

In the scene here, Marc's hand is fidgeting and twitching. Many times when Steven is explaining things to Marc in the Duat, we see Marc look to him with utter trust, adoration, and eagerness. He is unable to hide how he feels about Steven. Not the irritation or impatience he showed in the real world, but kindness and love.

Here, we see the real Marc Spector. The real reason why his scales balanced.

A theory on why he was suddenly worthy when Steven went over the edge? All of Marc's love for Steven was realized. It wasn't because he was suddenly 'whole' or 'singular'. But because he was seen to care for Steven. To do everything for Steven. He himself suddenly realized how much he needed Steven and depended on him. (just one of the theories that avoids the implied able-ism that could be taken away from the scene because I am hopeful and want to see the good in Marc and in why he was worthy).

3. He has been separated from his head-mates. Steven, who is his emotional protector is not there to help him reign in his extreme emotions. Jake, who is (in my headcannon) gate keeper and physical protector, is not there to save him and keep away the more harmful memories.

Not to say that Jake or Steven keep Marc masked, but more along the lines of they help Marc not get overwhelmed in certain situations.

4. Mirroring. This is an unfamiliar situation. He has lost his body. He has been separated from Jake and Steven as mentioned above. He is exhibiting the ultimate form of masking, by copying the energy of those around him. He has the same excitement that Steven has. The same open face and more so: When with Harrow, he shuts down and pushes out the same cool exterior while desperately trying to figure out what Harrow wants and how to please him so he can get out of the situation. Something he probably did a lot with his mother. What can he do and display to appease her so she won't hurt him.

Ironically, when Marc mirrors Steven, it shows his true side and we get to see who Marc really is under his gruff exterior: A kind and loving man.

A man that needs someone to see him. To really see him. Who has been afraid his whole life of people seeing the real him while also desperately wishing to be understood.

He still masks once resurrected and out of the Duat, but we see him smile, really smile, when he sees that Layla is alright. We hear the joy in his voice when talking to Steven. We see the fear when he doesn't understand what happened when Jake saved them.

We even see how his face twists and contorts when faced with killing Harrow with Layla and Steven there.

He is a man that does not have to be seen as the cold killer. He is starting to understand that he has found his safe people. People that maybe...just maybe... He can trust enough to be vulnerable and open around. People he can love.

[chaotic-neutral-knitter]

I think one of the kindest things you can do for people with various mental health struggles is just... let people back into your life after they've been absent for a while.

Making friends as an adult is so fucking hard already and isolating yourself from other people is a very common symptom of depression, anxiety, burnout, ocd, trauma, grief, etc. Which means that someone will do the hard work of recovery/healing and resurface back into a world where their previous friends have written them off because they stopped showing up.

So if you know someone where you're like "yeah we could have been better friends but they fell off the map a bit" and that person suddenly reaches out, or starts showing up to events even though you kind of forgot they were still in the group chat... well they may have been Going Through It and you don't actually have to punish them for their absence you can just be glad that they're back.

[mayhemchicken-artblog]

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off

EDIT: reblogs are STAYING OFF. op was right and correct and i have never regretted making a post as much as this one. if you want to reblog my art you can reblog something else from my blog. or commission me, lord knows i deserve financial compensation for the nightmare this post has put me through

[inkskinned]

the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.

when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."

but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.

now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.

the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.

but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."

the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.

but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?

because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!

and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[tossawary]

This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.

"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.

"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.

I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.

[maeamian]

Part of the reason that Republicans are so desperately acting like they will never lose again is because they are deeply terrified that this is their last real chance to win. The big orange dipshit came in and gutted the party of everyone who wasn't a loyalist, which left it full of nasty little gremlins who have gaping voids where charisma and human decency is supposed to go.

They still hold a lot of power, but if we stop them this year the next presidential election may not be the Most Important One Of Your Life™, that's not a guarantee or anything, but if they don't win here and now their future looks grim, this dipshit is the only guy they have left and he's extremely diminished and has his brains leaking out of his ears at this point. We can beat him into the ground.

So that's what we're gonna fucking do. We're gonna break these fucking fash. They will crash upon us and we're gonna break their fucking necks. When they come for us they will lose because they're fucking losers and we have each other's backs which is something they fundamentally are incapable of comprehending.

[egophiliac]

still ruminating over Lost In the Book With Spooky Skeletons Part 1, so here's a selection of some of my favorite little bits! (...some more loosely paraphrased than others) (I just feel like Idia has no room to criticize in general, okay)

anyway, I'm sure we're just going to have a fun time celebrating Halloween and nothing bad is going to happen whatsoever! :)

[oof-i-did-it-agaaiiin]

Beautiful from Ordinary Days

[aurosoulart]

Local Wizard Goes To Store, Casts Duplicate On All The Items

aka I went to the antique mart this weekend and did a bunch of art studies in augmented reality! SUPER fun way to hone the ol 3D brush skills

[herd-reject-arts]

So I'm leaving work and something darts in front of me, maybe 10ft away, too fast for me to see what it is. Peek around the tree blocking my path and I see this

Just like... a whole ass hawk. Dude's gotta be about 1.5ft tall. Massive fucking bird. And it's just staring me straight in my soul like this, even as I try to move ahead. It didn't budge. And there's only this path back to my car unless I want to walk on a busy highway. So I have the option of Death By Raptor or Death By Truck.

So I walk in the poison ivy filled patch off the sidewalk. Guy still isn't moving. Still staring me directly in the eyes. And I do this thing when animals are behaving strangely where I'll talk to them, so I'm just like, "Hey, man. I don't know you. You don't know me. This feels really threatening. I'm just trying to get to my car, dude. Can I get some space please? You're a big fucking bird. I see those claws. You could kill me right now, but I'd appreciate if you didn't, ok?"

It didn't move until I was about 2ft away. Again: I'm as far from it as I can be without walking into the street. It clearly wasn't going to budge. I walk past, thing flies up (silent, btw. Scary) and lands on a brick wall a little further ahead

Anyway. Weird guy. Nearly shit my pants when I noticed a bird big enough to carry off a fully grown cat was just... there, staring me in the face, unwilling to move away from me, a human, something it should see as a threat. I watched behind me the whole rest of the way to my car, just in case this bird decided to help me shed this mortal coil. 10/10 experience. Super cool guy.

[chittychittyyangyang]

Listen, you should never film strangers in public without their consent, but I swear there need to be fines or something for people who do that shit in some spaces. For example: I had to go to the ER last night, and some jerk filmed a woman who just came in and was clearly having an asthma attack. She immediately got to go back, and he was unhappy about that. Believe me, I get that it sucks having to wait when you're in pain, but you don't get to pick who deserves care when. The medical system in the US is a nightmare, and the ER could be the worst moment of someone's life. No one deserves to be recorded because some jack ass believes someone doesn't look like they need care.

This is fine to reblog. People who film strangers should be shamed if nothing else.

[bonetrousledbones]

fuck it since my birthday is in like one day i'm gonna use my birthday wish to tell y'all to look at the shit going on in southern Appalachia right now after Hurricane Helene. look at it and talk about it and spread resources about it like wildfire because nobody else fucking is and it feels like we're on our own out here.

there are people who are stranded in hazardous areas that are still safer than trying to leave by driving on the increasingly hazardous roads. i'm personally going into my third day without electricity at this point, and haven't been able to get any gas for a generator to even keep our fridge working. there are very few places with power or running water, and cell service has just barely been restored in the last hour. ground crews are working hard to repair things, but there are many, many areas that are entirely inaccessible that may not receive these fixes for several more days if not weeks. i'm afraid my own neighborhood might become one of those areas if repairs don't get to us soon, and since we're much more rural i have a difficult time trying to be optimistic about it.

we're very far inland. i guarantee you damn near everybody here was expecting a little more rain and wind like we usually get during hurricane season, if they even heard about the hurricane beforehand in the first place since most people only got about a twelve hour notice before landfall- after several major areas had already been flooded. our terrain protects us from most major weather events- most locals have never encountered a single tornado or legitimate tornado warning in our entire lives. nobody i've talked to or heard from about it seems to have had any idea that it would be this bad. everybody's wishing that they took it more seriously, but we've never, ever had to before. i've seen people comparing it to Hurricane Katrina and honestly i'm not sure if that's all too inaccurate. today while looking for a single working gas station i drove by a military helicopter parked in front of the elementary school i went to when i was little.

please for the love of god, talk about us. talk about the good memories you had here or the beauty of our mountains, and talk about how devastated we are as we watch historic structures, buildings, and entire towns get wiped from the face of the earth like they were never even there. stop dismissing us as uneducated hicks and rednecks and hilllbillies and fucking help us.

r/Asheville resource/updates megathread (Asheville is the largest city in western North Carolina)

How to set up disaster roaming for cell service

WLOS Live updates

Duke Energy power outage map

WNC Landslide Map

Hotels accepting locals

Emergency shelter locations

I live in western North Carolina so all of my own resources are centered around that. If anybody from the other impacted areas has additional sources they'd like to add, please don't hesitate to do so.

[gremnda]

completely self indulgent sky siblings doodle. i'm sick and i deserve to draw all the fluff ever

inspo

[chalkrub]

dinosaur in a lab coat - would you trust her with operating the centrifuge

[a-rabbit-obsessed-queer]

Aspec men deserve much more respect and recognition in the aspec community than they receive. They often face a different form of aphobia specific to them ("men are naturally sexual they can't be ace" "all men are unromantic that's not unique") this rhetoric is spouted by many, even members of our own community and I hope for a day where that is no longer the case. As an ace and demiro woman (demigirl but that's beside the point) I want to encourage folks to take the time to give the aspec men in their lives support and to the aspec men reading, you are who you say you are no matter what people say and you deserve the world. I'm sorry for the ways in which toxic masculinity has harmed you. You are a valued member of the aspec community and the queer community as a whole. No ace or aro person is broken and neither are you. I'm sorry if anyone has ever told you otherwise.