#I…i need to take a seat

[kepxler]

HES 6 WHAT

[tojisun]

poolverine x reader plus breeding (and daddy) kink makes me feral hhhs

just thinking about being sandwiched by them, your back pressed on wade’s chest while he spreads you open for logan, before he murmurs, “think about it, peanut. don’t you wanna be fucked full until it takes?”

you let out a quiet whimper, your eyes meeting logan’s only to jolt at the hungry look he’s giving you—it’s all snarled teeth and hissing breaths. you reach for him, wanting him close, wanting him now, but everything stutters to a weighted halt at wade’s following words—

“don’t you wanna have daddy’s pups?”

logan lurches forward at that, heavy and hungry, and you startle as he reaches past you. you turn, wide-eyed, and watch the moment he sinks his teeth into wade’s skin, marking him like it’s wade’s reward.

wade giggles, looking drunken himself at logan’s greedy mouth. then, he looks back at you.

“see?” he coos like he isn’t being mauled as he takes the full brunt of logan’s affections. “daddy thinks so too, peanut.”

you hum, nodding, not knowing what else to say because they look good like this—just as needy for each other as they always are for you.

[gayafsowhat]

Eepy hours

[tired-biscuit]

“sit on it” has got to be one of the hottest things a man can say

[cecoeur]

How do you sleep at night? No one to hide behind Betrayed every alibi you had You had every chance to make amends instead you got drunk on bitterness And you still claim that you're innocent, it's sad

[frankenshane]

white people obsessed with weed are so fucking annoying, signed a white person that's considering growing weed for fun

[yuri-is-online]

Loud whiner Haru truther? 👀

LOUD WHINER HARU REAL ( • ̀ω•́ )✧

If it's true Haru has a prosthetic that he's insecure about then I think there's got to be a really high level of trust between you if he's letting you take off his shirt. It starts out laid back, funny even he loves the sound of your laugh and how happy you are to be around him. He blows raspberries into your stomach before he snuggles into your thighs, tells you how much he trusts and loves you before taking you into his mouth. Haru might not know much but he knows service, he wants you to feel how much he treasures you as you pull him up and kiss him all over his face.

All those thoughts leave when he's inside you. He's choked up and stuttering, no technique at all because he needs this he needs you. He gets louder when you roll him onto his back, it's less taking control and more returning the favor; he's always taking such good care of you, won't he let you take care of him? He still tries to help settling his hands on your hips and guides you through the movements whining about how thankful he is for you but he won't protest if you playfully smack them and guide them over his head. And if you tell him to get louder he'll happily oblige.

[dollypopup]

Yeah, just gonna say that this fandom needs to shut the fuck up about Luke Newton and his love life. He's a grown man who was seen with a grown woman, and his relationship has no bearing on his acting ability. The parasocial relationship has gone too far.

This fandom has harassed him and people around him, bullied his ex-gf openly, and have already been horrifically misogynistic to the woman he's rumored to be dating. I've literally seen people calling him a groomer as if this woman isn't grown af at a whole 23 goddamn years old. He is 31. Some of y'all need to log off the damn internet. It's clear people are just mad that he and Nicola aren't an item and that he can't live a life outside of this work and doesn't exist to please like a paper doll they can go 'now kiss!' about. He dedicated years to this production that we've consumed and handled it with more grace than most of us would.

India and Corey had chemistry and didn't need to be together to sell Queen Charlotte. Simone and JB had chemistry and didn't need to be together to sell Bton Season 2. And Luke Newton and Nicola Coughlan have chemistry and don't need to be together to sell Bton Season 3. He can have a fucking girlfriend if he wants, he has literally done NOTHING wrong, and some of y'all are acting like he punted your puppy in the Thames and personally insulted you to your face.

Let the man live.

[carsbutirl]

“Lando is being a baby” Lando Norris is an actual human being who is being decimated by the press at every second and being told that he is not worth anything— even though he has made it very clear that he has struggled with mental health issues his entire life.

I actually don’t care how rude or mean he is IMAGINE if that had to be you. If every time you showed weakness or anything other than pure macho aggression people told you that you are just not worth achieving your dreams. Day in, day out, and very publicly to millions of people

Grow up and put yourself in the shoes of this actual human being. I don’t know why people have to tell you to maybe consider what might be going through someone else brain.

[sukibenders]

The hate from, primarily, straight women in regards to Michael being turned into Michaela is disgusting because it really shows how poorly they, not only, treat wlw ships but also have internalized misogyny because the way they are also talking about Benedict and Sophie but so clearly in a way that's borderline fetishizing--- I can't, especially because what do you mean Francesca's infertility plot is erased now that she's in a sapphic relationship? Like, you don't think that wlw relationship can't struggle with this as well? Be so for real.

[lyrai]

Lightning struck the tower twice

[thermitetermite]

I return from the grave for one night only to post a Helluva Boss AU. Enjoy my delulu AU about a Christmas tree capitalist clown spider demon and his adopted cyborg clown son.

Also there is swearing and mentions of Fizzaroli's accident.

Mammon being a half decent step-dad AU

Mammon hears about Fizz much earlier though the grapevine (Paimon complaining to all royal demons about how his son got rid of all their shit bc of some clown kid)

Interested, he attends a show in disguise.

He finds that Fizz is good. Like, really good! Dollar signs start popping up in his head. Also the little bugger kind of reminds him of himself.

Immediately asks to buy Fizz from Cash Buckzo. He refuses at first because Fizz is his star but with strong negotiating tactics (money and threats) he caves.

Fizz is nervous about leaving his only home behind but is excited to be "adopted" by Mammon! His hero!

It's giving bought by One Direction vibes

At first Mammon was planning to just train him to be a child actor/clown, give him a TV show and pawn him off to someone to actually raise full-time. He wanted to be the convenient step-dad, not a full time parent!

That changed after the first couple nights with Fizz living in his mansion.

It started with Fizz handing him a red balloon horse.

"Alright, not bad kid, but can ya make a balloon unicorn?"

Fizz ran off to attempt to make it. That'll keep him busy for a few hours, guess that meant he could make some calls and... He was back already with the completed unicorn.

"Give me another!"

"Uh, alright ya little bugger, why dontcha make a Quevie?"

This back and forth happened for the next few hours, with Mammon judging the balloon animal, giving a few pointers when he messed up, and Fizz making the next animal he asked for.

Damn, this parenting shit is easy.

It eventually got so late that Fizz fell asleep on the couch trying to complete a kangaroo.

Sighing, Mammon picked Fizz up and carried him to the bedroom he hired someone to decorate. He tucked him into bed and finally after an entire day was able to make a call.

However, the first call he made wasn't to the networking company or his broadcasting station. Instead, it was to Lucifer, his self proclaimed best friend and a successful parent.

"What is it Mammon? Do you have any idea how late it is?"

"Yeah, yeah. I just had a quick question for ya. What do children eat? Cereal? Oats? Ice cream?"

Needless to say, Lucifer had a long talk with Mammon about how to raise a kid, stating it'd be hard work.

After hanging up and going to bed, Mammon had only one thought on his mind. To raise this kid better than any of the other Sins could. His boy would be talk of the town and the best clown in all of Hell.

That first week of parenting went about as well as you'd expect.

Mammon had the approach of being "The fun step-dad" which included eating candy for every meal, teaching him swear words and showing him how to do all the tricks he thought a capable child could do.

(These tricks may or may not have included tax evasion and driving)

Speaking of, Mammon insisted on bringing Fizzaroli everywhere. Including work.

"Mammon, sir, I'm sorry for filing the paperwork for the expansion of LooLoo Land wrong- is that a child?"

"Yeah, this is my boy. Look attem. Ain't he talented!" Cue Fizz hanging off one of his arms. "Whatdya think Fizzie? Should we keep or fire him?"

"Fire!"

"You heard the boy! Off withya, ya bloody cunt!"

"Bloody cunt!"

Mammon would belly laugh whenever Fizzaroli would copy his swearing or accent. When is children swearing NOT funny?

Mammon's definitely the type to have tons of pictures in his wallet of his kid. Fizzaroli does get a TV show, lots of interviews and the spotlight often but whenever someone asks Mammon about him he immediately opens the photo wallet.

(He would kill anyone who even touched it)

Of course he still has some of the Mammon-ness we know, bribing and pushing Fizz to do shows, acts, commercials and more, causing Fizz to start getting overwhelmed.

Then one day Fizz's accident happened (it's a canon event)

Mammon practically broke down Belphagor's door when he got the news Fizz was hurt, demanding his boy get the best treatment in Hell.

Mammon didn't sleep for the entire time Fizz was in that hospital bed, sitting beside him for days at a time just thinking about how he nearly lost him. He couldn't lose him.

When Fizz woke up/was stable, Mammon was there during his emotional moments. When Fizz asked if Mammon would replace him he scoffed.

"Fizzie, why would I replace you? You're in recovery right now. A break. Yer fans are dying to see that Fizzie face when you get outta here. You're more popular and more in demand than ever. You do the recoverin and I'll show you the huge profit we return."

Mammon to English translation: It's stupid to think I'll leave. You'll be able to return to the stage, I'll make sure of it. You'll get better and I'll be here with you.

Fizz eventually recovered but needed limbs so Mammon sent a request (demand) to the best mechanic in Hell, Asmodeus. If anyone could make limbs for his boy it'd be that rooster fuck.

Of course just because Mammon had faith in him didn't mean he wasn't picky in what he delivered.

"Can ya loop your arm like a bendy straw?"

"Uh, no."

"Then it's not good enough for you!"

Mammon practically sent Asmodeus a list of limb adjustments and upgrades that needed to be done every other week. All other times he had Fizzie trying all these different therapies, practicing with his limbs, and occasionally try doing a trick. (Not clown car driving after last time). Eventually he was mostly satisfied with the work and to celebrate "Ozzie not *HONK*-ing up" he started teaching Fizz how to play the guitar.

Cue a bit of a time skip of say 7 years.

Fizz has his hands in nearly every facet of entertainment. News, sports, cooking competitions (which he surprisingly sucked at), and of course comedy. Fizz didn't want to say it but doing so much had him tired, stressed, and anxious. He was doing this for Mammon, the person who gave him everything. He couldn't just let him down. He'd seen what happened to those that failed him. All those people who got fired for mistakes they made. He couldn't fail.

At the same time Mammon wants to get into the robot doll industry. Not sex dolls because he can't stand the thought of his (boy) brand being sold like that. Instead personal assistance robots that have all the features. It can make coffee, teach you yoga, be a parent, etc. but of course he needs the mechanical help of Asmodeus again.

Once again Fizz is taking trips to Lust to oversee the production of the robots. After 2 years of this the robots are completed (a huge financial success) and Fizz asks Mammon if he can stay with Ozzie.

Mammon is surprised but ok with it as long as he visits and does a show every now and again. Especially guest judging the Clown Pageant.

He doesn't realize Fizz and Oz have a thing until the Clown Pageant (his final one in canon)

Once it comes out, oh boy, Mammon goes full demon mode. Shit gets ugly. Mammon goes on his normal rant (minus the "raised you like the son I didn't want" part) and Fizz, unwaivering because he's seen this a million times, retorts back with all the anxiety Mammon caused. The acting and shows. How it weighed on him. How he was so scared of fucking something up and getting kicked out.

"I'd never kick you out! You're the crown jewel of my empire! My runt turned pick of the litta! I made you in my image! If I pushed you hard it was because you could be better! I raised you! You've got my training in your back pocket so I knew you could be a better clown than I ever was! All of this was for you!"

Eventually Mammon breaks down and asks why Asmodeus. He's worried about their relationship considering he's known Asmodeus since the beginning of hell.

"Why do you need to date him when you have my empire! If you need money, we have it! If you need companionship, we can buy it! If you need power we have that too! We built this empire! Your talent brought in a fortune and you've seen how to run the business! If you need your own power or your own space you can have it!"

"I'm not with him for any of those things! I know I have everything else here! But I love him Mammon! He takes care of me. He's kind, sweet, handsome, and supports me even on my roughest days. I love him."

"...he makes you feel safe?"

"Yes."

"He treats you good?"

"He treats me amazingly."

"You love him?"

"With all my heart."

"...ok."

"Ok?"

"I... Respect your decision. I'm going to make it about me but please bear with me. I know I haven't been the best at raising you. I can be overbearing. And clingy. And I pushed you to do a lot of things that were hard or uncomfortable or er... greedy. I haven't been the best influence on your life but I did my best and if I had to I'd do it all over again."

"Mam..."

"Up up up, let me finish ya little shit. You know I have a hard time letting go of things. And I was kidding myself when I thought I'd have ya forever. I forgot how fast ya implings grow up. I thought I could keep ya safe and smilin but I couldn't even do that right. The second most painful thing I experienced in my life was gettin kicked from heaven. The most was seein you in that hospital bed. I've been smotherin ya since. Yer my boy and I wanted better for ya. Thought I could protect ya if I pushed harder. Taught ya more. Did more shit with ya. But in the end you were always gonna have ta leave ta find a life of yer own.

Mammon paused, taking a familiar but heavily deflated remnant of a red horse balloon from under his hat

"I'm at least glad ya took somethin after me. Yer greedy like me and ya landed the best bachelor Hell has ta offer. I... I don't want to let ya go but... Ya need to do this. Live yer life kid, and live it better than me."

The fucking stadium was in tears (me too tbh)

Before Fizz could say anything (he was choking on his words) Mammon extended a card with his sigil on it.

"Remember I'm always here. Please... Call me if ya need me."

Fizz wrapped his robotic limbs around Mammon, bringing him in for a tight hug.

"I love you, Dad."

Mammon cried on that stage, hugging the son he always wanted.

[httpiastri]

will: “how much are you looking forward to getting back to japan?”

liam: “well i don’t know if i’m driving yet…”

[lesbianpegbar]

this is her world we're all just living in it

[seventh-district]

Sam: "Look at me. Hey- look at me a second. I know. I know you're tough. I know how strong you are. You have every right to be proud of that. But being able to handle somethin' doesn't mean you should have to. Least of all when I'm right here trying to help. Please let me help. If not for you then for me, because I don't like knowin' you're hurtin', especially when there's somethin' I can do about it."

Me, shaking my head, fighting back literal tears: "B-but it's gonna give you another headache!"

[mid13s]

when you remember achilles and patroclus are separated again so you have to die