#I’ve watched too much of both shows and my mind wants to give Lloyd a loving yet chaotic upbringing
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residentdormouse · 2 years ago
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Yammering Out “Y” Words
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Yeah, yikes. As yelling turns to yawning, I must yield this battle to you @mrsmungus; my mind only yearns for yesterday’s dreams. For younger years where being yanked from a slumber wouldn’t be as yucky. As it is, best I have to offer is the image of yeti’s doing yoga in the yard to maintain their youth.
…aka I am so tired and there is not enough coffee…
My Words: Yell, Yawn, Yard, Yank, Youth
Your words: Since this is going to be a scattered hit or miss, with a majority of miss - find five sections with a ‘Z’ anywhere in it. Bonus Points for a word starting with 'Z'.
As Always - Open Tag, even though this really is coming to the end now… What are we going to do with the time. I feel like pooh trying to brainstorm a new challenge.
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(There were a surprising amount of spoilers with these words. Or maybe I’m using spoiler too liberally. I’m not sure. I’ve tried my best.)
Yell:
Another wave rolled over her, and she dropped to the floor, involuntarily yelling out in pain. While she had done well at hiding it so far, at putting up a strong front, this shock radiated out from her and she couldn’t hold back the cries of pain any longer. The added verbal release made her unable to hear that Lloyd had dropped to the ground along with her. It wasn’t until the pain fully receded the she noticed him laying there curled in on himself on the floor is, eyes closed and face twisted in a look of torment.
It took her a second to fully register what she saw, but as soon as it did, she quickly made her way over. "Hey, Lloyd... Hey…" she shook his shoulder and he jolted up into a sitting position, immediately scurrying back against the wall.
"What the FUCK did you just do to me?!" He placed a hand to his temple; energy of a wounded and cornered animal exuded off of him in waves.
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Yawn:
(Hey, another two-fer!)
The next morning came faster than either of them had wanted. Both her and Glen were slow to make their way over to Stu and Fran’s. While he said he appreciated the nod to his youth, Glen made the determination that the all night, late night drinking needed to be curbed, at least for a short while; they would both be essentially useless otherwise. Last night had certainly taken its toll on him, and she honestly wasn’t faring any better. Thankfully, the previous occupants of their home had the ibuprofen stocked up.
She let out a yawn as Stu greeted them. "Good mornin', you two! Beautiful start to the day, isn’t it?" His extra chipper greeting was solely to antagonize and that fact was not missed.
Walking right past with a smile and a middle finger, Hayden didn't give him much mind. "Uh-huh, yeah, love you too, Redman." Glen just shrugged, following behind her.
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Yard:
(cheating a bit.... Yard shows up, but it's endgame of Spiral - please accept backyard as a substitute. It can be just a plain old yard for our purposes. 😂)
As they passed through the door, Hayden instantly felt the relief of their arrival come back. The journey was over. They had made it. And she was accepted.
Introductions were already underway on her arrival, but she picked up quickly. Ray Brentner was sitting at the table, observing silently, while Tom Cullen was playing with Kojak on the floor. The latter pair brought a huge smile to her face, and plunking down on the carpet, she joined in.
“So I’m not the only sucker for his belly rub whines. He's good at that.”
“My Laws, yes! This is the first dog that's come here. M-O-O-N that spells first. Is he yours?”
"Glen found him. Only dog we saw on the trip as well."
"Well, I'm mighty glad you all made it."
Equally glad they had made it, Hayden continued to pet the pup until everybody moved through the kitchen to the (back)yard for dinner.
Yank:
(Four instances of this and all of them spoiler-rific. I guess this may be the least of the bunch? From where you’re at, I’m assuming teal book has already been mentioned enough to know it has importance.)
Hayden yanked out the teal book from the bookshelf, and watched the wooden pieces of shelf that connected it splinter away. She knew the deafening static now surrounded her, but for the first time, the underwater feeling was to her benefit. Now that the screeching static was simply a muffled noise in the background, she only had to fight against her fading energy.
She tried to hop down from the chair, but it turned into falling. With a hard crash to the floor, she let out a pained cry. Her shoulder cried out at her, and it took all of her willpower to push herself up from her position. Once she brought herself back up to standing, she looked back at the red spot on the hardwood, smeared across the floor where her back had hit. Time constraints were baring down on her.
Shaking, she moved back to the bookshelf and put all her weight on the side panel, beginning to push.
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Youth:
There was something special about watching karma happen in real time, and Max could barely contain her laughter as high-on-his-horse James stumbled and crashed face first into the dirt.
“Don't worry, Graceful, you get used to it."
"Right."
By the time her hand extended towards him, he was already up on one knee. A moment passed, before he grudgingly accepted the help. Clearly, he was not somebody who liked to rely on others. She understood the logic. For the bulk of her youth, she was the same way. Headstrong and independent, and you best not get in her way. A woman of her own making.
Until she wasn’t.
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coles-walloper · 1 year ago
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Yknow I’m finishing the last 2 episodes of HoT tonight & am prepared to either go straight into the Oni Trilogy afterwards but there’s something about Episode 8 that I wanted to note!
(( Long rambles abound ))
I think I’ve heard a few people describe Kai’s behavior as very much jumping to conclusions when he faces off against Ray with knowledge of his parents’ alleged betrayals — and I do 100% agree Kai tends to be brash. Versus Nya’s behavior, in holding Kai back to get him to listen to their father.
But I think from the perspective of both Kai, it kinda makes sense why!
Like for Nya, since she likely wasn’t old enough at the time to directly know their parents, it’s understandable she’d want to her out her father because this is the first time she’s honestly seen or heard from him.
On the other hand, Kai’s personally grown up with both parents while he’s at an age to be conscious of his need for them & attachment as a young child who misses them. There’s a LOT of trauma in realizing your parents weren’t gone the whole time, that they were out there and just left you behind to do something else — something that wasn’t what happened but very much so was skewed to appear so. So likely the thought going through his mind would be ‘You weren’t there for us when we needed in order to do things for the people actively harming us?’ I thought that might be interesting to note.
We got a super nifty fight scene out of that so I’ll add that to my collection of cool Kai moments lololol.
Other HoT ending notes:
- The fusion dragon was absolutely EPIC! And a boiling sea that works with a master of fire & master of water???! That’s such a neat concept!!! These things make me wished that the season could’ve been implemented better bc HoT had such huge potential (I prob won’t criticize anything tho cause I feel other people wrote a lot over the flaws more eloquently!).
- Ray and Maya were pretty great for the short time they were there, but I have really mixed feelings on bringing them back. It was such a huge part of the beginnings for awhile — the siblings starting off alone in the Pilots, Chen holding the backstories of Kai’s parents over himself, then finally both siblings grieving in DotD with a beautiful scenes & the foreshadowing of their parents’ backstories when Kai wonders if they’ll ever figure out what happened. All of that was just implemented so well!
I heard alternate ideas proposed from those who thought the set up for an arc where Ray & Maya were actually evil would give a lot to explore. That’d definitely be interesting for sure!
But of my own personal preferences, I really liked them being on the good side but the issue stemming from a distortion of perspective obscuring the actual events & intention. And just overall the idea of them being dead but the story being years later, where Kai & Nya get to the bottom of things and unwrap what actually happened. Now that they’re back, and it might be hard for the show to fit them into the plot when they’re established as extremely important.
In a sense, I kind of worry about getting that same feeling for Lord/Sensei Garmadon the next season too. I already know what happens so I’m just bracing myself for it >~<.
Lastly, for the next season:
I can’t wait to finally get to watch the things I’m curious about the most!
In a jumbled list — I really want to see the implementation of Pixal as the new Samurai X, Skylor’s reappearance & role (& just more into how her powers work if she uses them!), the arc with Sensei Wu developing with the ninja, Nya-Lloyd dynamic, Karloff returning (omg - I LOVE them bringing back other elemental masters!!), and the Mr. E rivalry with Zane (the Echo Zane theories I’ve read are so exciting!!!).
I’m a bit scared though because the Kai character assassinations begin along with this marking the point of many people not being able to see Garmadon the same again :(. So I hope the good skill of the writers makes up for that bc I know this show does a lot with all of the elements surrounding it!
Aaaaaaa I have so many thoughts my brain won’t let me sleep 😭
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fancycat-thesilvertux · 2 years ago
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Alright, okay. This won’t leave me alone, so I’m gonna make it everyone else’s problem.
A Lego Monkie Kid x Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu AU where MK and Lloyd are half-brothers.
How, you’re gonna wonder? A younger Garmadon had a fling with MK’s mother while she was visiting Ninjago for vacation. She didn’t realize she was pregnant until she was back in China, and unfortunately, she couldn’t get into contact with Garmadon since they didn’t exchange information.
MK’s mother died giving birth to him, and while he was taken in by her family, they didn’t like MK because one, he was born out of wedlock, and two, they blamed him for the death of his mother. Pigsy and Tang (freenoodleshipping4life!) adopted MK when they found a little waif rummaging around the garbage cans behind the restaurant. MK’s bio fam was charged with child neglect, endangerment, and abuse and taken away.
MK always had weird dreams, MK’s dreams including weapons made of gold, a man swathed in darkness, colorful and sparkly tornados, snake people, and skeleton warriors. Pigsy and Tang chalked it up to him just being very imaginative, although they worried because some of what MK drew from his dreams was frightening. They got MK to talk to Sandy about them, and MK stopped having dreams - what they thought. He just kept it a secret he was still having those dreams, hiding his drawings.
When MK and Lloyd started dreaming about one another, they found that they were actually sharing dreams, which baffled them as they didn’t understand how? Nonetheless, the two made good with the situation and talked, Lloyd finding a friend and older brother figure in MK whereas MK found a friend and little brother figure in Lloyd.
When MK learned about Lloyd’s situation at Darkley’s, he said as upset. He knew what it was like to be somewhere with people that made you feel unwanted and unloved, fearful of your safety, and he didn’t want Lloyd to continue being in such a situation. MK had confided in Mei about his dreams and Lloyd, and Mei believed him as she didn’t have a reason not to believe MK, he never lied to her about something so serious-sounding before, after all!
They devised a plan to go to Ninjago to get Lloyd. Mei told her parents that she wanted to go to Ninjago to check out the history there since the place had a lot of interesting history, and she wanted to bring MK along since she thought he’d get a kick out of it. They reluctantly agreed since Mei was showing an interest in the history of something and with MK, she was less likely to get into any trouble. Pigsy and Tang got convinced since they thought a change of scenery would be good for MK, who seemed agitated as of late.
MK told Lloyd about the plan, and Lloyd told MK that the best place they’d be able to meet is Ninjago City, since Darkley’s was taking a field trip there. The boys have some kind of guardian watching out for them to have that kind of luck. (It later gets learned that it was the FSM whispering in some ears. He wanted to change his grandsons’ destinies.)
The only issue that happened in getting Lloyd away was that the principal tried stopping them until Mei threatened him. Never underestimate a descendant of dragons!
The three return to China where it got explained to Pigsy and Tang that while on the trip, they found Lloyd who was running away from his school and that he didn’t have anyone else wanting him. While initially hesitant, the two decided to adopt Lloyd as well since the kid needed stability in his life, but also because Lloyd had the same lost and vulnerable look on his face they remembered MK having before they took him in.
And for a while, everything went well until Lord Garmadon came a-knockin, trying to find where his son had gone.
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najatheangel · 4 years ago
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𝐌𝐲 𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐞
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pairing: Lee donghyuck x reader (ft. nct members)
genre: fluff, angst, comedy and spice.
inspired song: Bestie by Lloyd.
summary: donghyuck’s and his s/o memories as best friends leading up to becoming lovers. (btw this one’s a little longer than the ones i usually write so beware loves.)
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Haechan’s POV: June, 24th, 2018. “Today’s the day where I finally tell her how I feel. After 7 years of my friendship, growing up together and holding back my feelings for so long, Today is the day where things change. I’m tired of being stuck in the friend zone this is my one and only chance before she moves away. Now or Never Hyuck...”
“She's a bad one not a fast one. Every time we get together we have fun”
Growing up, me and y/n always were always bound to be apart of each other’s lives. We’ve grew up in the same neighborhood, our parents met each other in school, our friends are dating each other and we even go to the same school together. Sounds very corny right? It’s true though.
Our thing was always playing horror games together every night after we finish doing homework together. She was always the procrastinator so I had to give her some motivation. Not only that, we always play around the swing sets in the park that’s right in front of our houses to talk about anything and everything that was going on in our life’s.
This one time she got so drunk after Mark’s birthday party and was trying to swing so high and flew off the swing set thinking she was super man. Heh, she can be such a idiot at times. She may be one of the goofiest, bubbly and sweetest people I know. She can also be caring, overprotective and keep me calm whenever I’m always acting crazy.
I don’t remember what exact moment I feel in love with you, but I do remember feeling like as time went by, my love for you stared to grow much stronger. Everyone around us was starting to suspect how we felt about it each other especially my mom she adored you so much and loved the idea of us being together.
She would always ask “Where’s your girlfriend y/n?” Or “Aren’t you supposed to be with your girlfriend right now?” Ah girlfriend, I love the sound of that. Anyways I was grossed out at the idea at first because I only saw you as my sister once before and not to mention I was immature.
She would always ask “Where’s your girlfriend y/n?” Or “Aren’t you supposed to be with your girlfriend right now?” Ah girlfriend, I love the sound of that. Anyways I was grossed out at the idea at first because I only saw you as my sister once before and not to mention I was immature.
She would always ask “Where’s your girlfriend y/n?” Or “Aren’t you supposed to be with your girlfriend right now?” Ah girlfriend, I love the sound of that. Anyways I was grossed out at the idea at first because I only saw you as my sister once before and not to mention I was immature.
She would always ask “Where’s your girlfriend y/n?” Or “Aren’t you supposed to be with your girlfriend right now?” Ah girlfriend, I love the sound of that. Anyways I was grossed out at the idea at first because I only saw you as my sister once before and not to mention I was immature.
Once we’ve started getting much older I've tried dating other girls but none of them just didn’t compare to you. I’ve tried to joke around with them, they wouldn’t take me seriously. When I try to ask them out on dates, they would ditch me for someone else. When I try to be affectionate, they reject and always want to stay friends. I normally had luck keeping girls around, but only for a short amount of time. It seemed like every week I had a new girlfriend.
I knew y/n was always frustrated at me trying to tell me there’s other fish in the sea, but hell I want to my little mermaid and that’s y/n-ie. I even teased her about it, but she didn’t seem to take a hint.
“You know y/n... we should honestly just date. We would be the next Hyuna and Edawn in the school. They would have nothing on us.” I even nudged her on the shoulder to get her smiling.
“Hmm? Are you insane that would be too weird. We’re like brother and sister.” I could tell she was flustered, but she wasn’t exactly to thrilled with the idea. “Plus you know how I feel about Mark already. I’ve got to really wow him at this game tonight.” Oh yeah I forgot to mention she had a crush on my other best friend Mark Lee at the time.
“I know she should just be my friend Yet I'm hoping, I'm hoping that maybe it will lead In love happy end.”
It would work my nerves every time she would talk about him and always would ask advice on what to do, but I was very hopeful and believed I still had to chance to win her heart. I gush to everyone including the boys everyday about how madly in love I was with y/n without even realizing.
I would tell everyone, well except her of course. Johnny almost told my secret to everyone at Jaehyun’s house party when we were all playing strip uno. It was shut down real quickly because Doyoung gave him a long hard talk after awhile.
That night was also the worst for me because that was the same days the homecoming game where you confessed your feelings to Mark and became officially a couple. In my mind I wanted to be happy for the two of you as I watched you two kissed each other in front of everyone.
After that day, I avoided you for a while and couldn’t accept the fact that I couldn’t have you at that very moment. I couldn’t spend more time with you, hold you, kiss you, brag to everyone how much I loved you.
Although I was torn and felt defeated when you started dating Mark, I still felt a tiny bit of hope that someday I would still have a chance to make you mine and have our happy ending.
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Y/N POV: June 24th, 2018. The day that I say farewell to my best friend Lee Donghyuck before going leaving to go to Harvard. I can’t believe this day has finally come we haven’t had the chance to hang out throughout our entire senior year so I want to make this count. I also want to tell him how I’ve felt about him. Let’s see where do I even start....
“We were children when we met. Just playing house and drinking sodas at the corner store.”
I remember having a hard time making friends my family moves from city to city because of my dad career as a entrepreneur for multiple companies and my mom working as a travel nurse. I was bullied for my struggling with my weight and for being an outcast which caused a lot of depression for me.
One day I remember running away from these girls in my school because they were trying to throwing apples at me. It was they’re way of trying to help me “eat healthy.” Jokes on them I was the top runner in the track team hehe.
Anyways, I lost them for a good second until I was trapped surrounded by them at the market by my house. I almost felt at lost against the 4 girls, until this crazy guy Lee Donghyuck comes out of no where scaring them away with his Freddy Kruger mask threatening them to leave me alone or he’ll haunt them in their sleep.
I felt bad for laughing, but it was one of the most nicest thing anyone has ever done for me ever since I’ve moved to Korea. He randomly introduces himself to me and offers me to play with him for an exchange of saving my life from those bullies.
“Hey my name is Donghyuck. Those girls always find their next target to pick on, but no worries princess I’m here to protect you. Let me introduce you to my other friends.”
He reached his hand on to me and ever since I was always dragged on to his crazy adventures.
“Like a brother from another. Didn't notice all the other girls they wanted more.”
Donghyuck was pretty popular when it came to having lots of guy friends and dating even when we were kids. In 5th grade on Valentine’s I remembered his desk being flooded with chocolates and anonymous love letters stuffed in backpack.
The idea didn’t bother me at first because I saw Hyuck as my older protective brother. I even slid some letters in my self saying “Happy Valentine’s Day loser. Enjoy those kits kats!” We tend to tease each other a lot, but that’s how we showed our love to each other.
People in our class including the boys Jaemin, Chenle and Yang Yang were encouraging us to date, but we just never seemed thrilled with the idea.
“Awhh c’mon you guys would be so cute together. You guys have kissed once before anyways it’s a sign.” I remember the boys would always poke fun at us, but we both would scream.
“Ew no way! Plus that kiss didn’t count it was for a school play.”
Yet every time a guy would try to ask me out, Donghyuck would scare them away because he claims that I’m still too young to date. Smh, yeah I should’ve known that it was actually because you were jealous.
“But now look at the glow up. You're the finest thing I ever seen, but you never been more than a friend to me.”
As much as I hate to admit it, but god sometimes Donghyuck can be hot...sexy...hell good looking when he wants to be. It doesn’t help that he’s teasing me about it either.
There was this one time when we were playing Mario Karts in his room and it was on a hot summer day at the time. This guy had the nerve to take his shirt off in front of me with sweat dripping on his abs, hair slightly messy to the side, and leans back with his grey sweat pants on.
GREY SWEATS!! Like cmon. I could barely concentrate on the game after awhile admiring how painly handsome. I felt very guilty because I was still dating Mark at the time, but my mind was going 2 different directions.
“Hey y/n if your hot you can take your shirt off too. I thought my mom had the mechanic fixed the ac by now so sorry about that.” There he goes sticking his tongue out like that again. Does he have no shame.
“Umm, Hyuck I just remembered I have a test on Friday to study for. Tootles!” I knew if I would’ve stayed in his room much longer I would’ve either passed out or sink deep into his tempting body leaning against mine. It was not only the heat in the room that was driving me crazy, but my beating heart that was burning my chest.
Before I tried to leave he shut the door and pushed me against the wall staring deep into my eyes. “You know princess, we don’t have a math test Friday right? I’m in the same class as you.”
This man uggh, next he proceeds to make me look at him in the eye by lifting my chin up. “D-did I say math test, silly me. I meant biology test.” After laughing awkwardly for a while I realized he wasn’t laughing with me like he usually does. It was like the vibe changed in a matter of 5 sec.
“Listen y/n...I know your dating Mark and all, but would it be wrong to just let me hold you one last time.” Yeah it would be awful, especially when your still technically half naked in front of me.
I’ve never even gotten close to kissing Mark before, yet my friend of 6 years is going to do it. So I had to run out of there before things got worse. “I-I can’t do that Hyuck. You know that wouldn’t be right. Now if you’ll excuse me.”
“I'm thinking that one day you'll be mine. And I don't wanna lose you.”
I ran home as fast as I can hyperventilating before I let myself caught any feelings. The truth was for awhile I only wanted to date Mark to try to forget about Hyuck, but after that night I’ve started to realize that I can’t escape my feelings that I have for him it’s impossible.
I love him more than anyone in this world. The thought of that saying had me laughing and crying that night.
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June 26th, the day Donghyuck will have one last chance to confess his feelings before his princess y/n leaves off to go to school. Y/N and Donghyuck both run out of each other’s house and decided to meet up at the swing set after 6 years.
They both sit down sighing looking up at the orange sunset sky that’s shinning throughout the area. The two of them slowly swing looking down at the ground waiting for the other person to speak up first.
“So...I bet you probably heard the news already huh? I’ve finally got accept to Harvard. So tomorrow I’ll be going back to my hometown to begin my semester in fall.” Donghyuck responds back by saying.
“I know, I heard from my mom. She nearly cried. You know it would’ve been nice to hear from you. I haven’t seen you since last week.” Y/n finally looks up at him with tears falling down her face.
“Hyuck I’ve been going through so much this past week. I’ve broken up with Mark, my brother was stuck in the hospital and I almost had to repeat senior year if I didn’t pass that state test. So I’m sorry I didn’t contact you lately.”
Hyuck quickly stands up and hugs y/n gently by stroking her hair. “It would’ve been nice to hear your voice. I miss you and I love you.”
They both freeze up at the words he just said “Y-you what now?” Hyuck gulps at first, but then he snaps out of it ready to pour his heart out.”
“LISTEN PRINCESS I LOVE YOU OKAY?? Not just as a friend either. This whole year I never got to hang out with you and I don't know how to pretend, I hate falling in love with my best friend. That night you left my room I almost gave up on us, but I knew I had to tell you before you walk out of my life. Talk about bad timing right?”
Y/N starts giggling wiping her tears for a split second but then smiles by saying.
“I love you too Donghyuck. I have for a long time actually I just didn’t want to ruin my one and only specially friendship I had with you. I was even thinking that trying to move on by dating someone else would work, but it didn’t. Without you in my life, I am blue as the sky.”
The two of you of crack up laughing again at your embarrassing thoughts of each other, but immediately stop trying to think of what should happen next.
“We’re truly some idiots. Now we only have a few hours left of being a couple before you leave. So what happens next y/n?”
Y/n sits on Hyuck’s lap hugging him tightly and leans into his face by saying. “No worries we’ll figure this out once I move. For right now let’s just enjoy our last few hours together as a couple.”
Hyuck wraps arms around y/n waist and feels his heart skipping a beat once she starts kissing him softly in his ear. “Princess you know I’m very ticklish right there.” Ignoring his comments y/n proceeds to kiss his ear again, but then starts trailing down to his neck.
“My B-E-S-T, a true friend to me. Give me love and energy, that is what you send to me”
“Mmm keep calling me princess and I promise you I won’t be able to hold back.” He wiggles his eyebrows at your bold response and smirks by saying...
“Well what’s stoping you? We can do it right here right now on these swing sets.” He starts sliding your hands in your thighs while finally kissing you on your lips.
All that built up passion and emotion was easily displayed as you were kissing him. Not to mention the fact that he’s sliding his hand in your jeans which is making it hard for you to keep your voice down.
“Ahh keep it down y/n...Do you want the neighbors to hear you?” He teases you more by moving your hand in his jeans. “Do it for me too.”
“Lee Donghyuck, are you crazy?? Why don’t we just do this in your room. We will get caught for sure.” He pouts for a second and says
“Yes I’m crazy for you. You already know this though. How about this, we can finish this in my room and we can just tell my mom we stayed up playing games again all night long. Deal?”
“Deal!” You give him one last peck on the lips and grab him by running into his house like there’s no tomorrow. “Slow down princess!” The two of you slammed the door in his room and for the whole night you never dared to leave his side for a split second.
“It's what you do to me.”
The morning after ended up becoming very emotional for the both of you, because this is the last the you’ll be seeing each other face to face until the both of you are done with school. While he’s off becoming a singer, you’ll be on your way becoming a lawyer.
Out of all the places you could possibly move away from again your home next to Donghyuck and his family was the hardest to leave from. You made so many memories here and would cherish it for the rest of your life.
Before heading the road you give your best friend and now boyfriend one last hug and kiss on the forehead before putting your last luggage in the trunk and hitting the road to start your journey.
Although your both moving on to different paths of life career wise, you both will always have your history together and promised to reunite as a couple again when the time is right.
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Thanks so much for reading this far you guys and feedback would be much appreciated. ✨
𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 🏷 : @himitsu-luna @starrdustville @xxminmixx @dundun-baby @purplepsycho03 @kpopsnowball
Send an ask if you want to be added or removed from the tag list. 💫💫💫
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lloydskywalkers · 4 years ago
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chrysanthemum
1/2 of the fics i wrote for the 10th anniversary zine!! if you haven’t checked it out yet please do @ninjaneverquit-zine , everyone worked so hard and did such a wonderful job, i’m beyond honored to have been included <3
I may not have been in the fandom since the start, but ninjago means the world to me - it’s gotten me through some of the worst times and pushed further in writing than i thought i’d go, and the fandom’s been a particularly bright light in my life since i’ve joined 💕and of course i can’t not celebrate that by writing for the light of my life lloyd garmadon, so here’s me crying over the garmadons anniversary-style :’D
Garmadon’s son has only been on the earth for twenty-four hours, and he’s only been Lloyd for nineteen, but he already finds himself terrified of the tiny, living thing he cradles in his arms.
“He’s so small,” he tells Misako, eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Is he supposed to be this small?”
Misako, who’s been answering questions similar to this for the better part of the morning, rolls her eyes. “He’s fine, Garmadon. He was born a little early, that’s all.”
Not as reassured as he should be, Garmadon returns his gaze to his son. He’s sleeping now, deathly still in his arms, and he resists the urge to wave a hand over his tiny face, if only to feel the small puffs of breath he knows must be there. He brushes a wisp of hair from his head instead, marveling at how pale it is.
“He’s got my father’s hair,” he murmurs.
“I don’t care, Garmadon, we’re still not naming him after the man.”
It’s Garmadon’s turn to roll his eyes. “I never said that. I said Montgomery was an unacceptable name to burden my son with.”
“Oh, your son.”
He misses the rest of her retort as Lloyd fidgets briefly, tiny features screwing up as he shifts. A flash of lightning from outside brightens the room, and Garmadon pulls Lloyd closer reflexively. The thunder crack follows soon after, and Garmadon flinches, the thick smell of rain filtering through the open windows. He can already see thick droplets sliding down the hydrangeas Misako’s growing in the windowsill, drowning the pale flowers. It’s been pouring all week, typhoons hitting the coast with gusto as they always do this time of year. Garmadon doesn’t like it — his son is much more suited for the sun and all its brightness, not the grey-skied downpour of thunderclouds.
Lloyd hardly reacts to the downpour, having gone still and silent in his arms once again. Garmadon’s heartbeat quickens. He shouldn’t sleep this much, should he? He doesn’t remember Wu being like that, but he was so young when Wu was born, and it was so long ago, and he can’t feel for Lloyd’s breathing now because the breeze pouring through the window’s too strong, and—
A soft hand sets on his shoulder. “Here,” Misako sighs, guiding Garmadon’s hand to rest gently over Lloyd’s chest. “Feel. That’s a heart, going strong.”
Despite his hesitance, a deep-rooted part of him still desperately afraid his touch might hurt something so small, Garmadon does so. Lloyd’s heartbeat is rapid and as fragile as a bird’s wing, but undeniably there. A small, living thing.
Something warm curls in his chest, and Garmadon thinks he might understand his father’s delight in creation — in things that live.
Not, of course, that his father has ever created anything so perfect as Lloyd, but Garmadon can credit him for having tried.
* * *
It’s weird, having a dad.
Not the concept of having a dad — Lloyd’s bragged enough about being the son of Lord Garmadon to at least get that part. But actually having him here, a living, breathing person who looks at Lloyd and cares—
It’s weird, that’s all. Not that it’s a bad weird.
“You need to wrap your hands, before you go hitting things like that,” Garmadon scolds gently, twisting gauze around Lloyd’s bruised, swollen fingers. “The others can show you how, for training. They should have shown you earlier.”
Lloyd bites his lip. He doesn’t tell his dad that the bruises are less from training, and more from pointlessly banging on bars in an attempt to get on Pythor’s nerves. It sounds silly, compared to the way his dad swept in like a big hero and took out all the snakes in single swipes.
A big hero. Lloyd wonders if the others will ever see him that way, too.
His hand twinges as the gauze pulls tight, and Lloyd sucks in a sharp breath. Garmadon flinches, drawing his hands back.
“I’m sorry,” he says, quickly. “I keep forgetting — you’re so small.”
Lloyd makes a face at that. Small? “I’m not that short,” he grumbles. “I’ve grown lots.”
“Of course you have,” Garmadon amends. “I only—”
His expression twists, and Lloyd’s stomach drops. There’s that look again.
“I’m sorry,” Garmadon repeats, sounding downtrodden.
Lloyd purses his lips. For all his bragging, he’s never really thought much about whether he likes his family or not. It’s hard, when you don’t have one around to like. Watching the way his dad worries and his uncle walks around all stone-faced now, Lloyd’s not sure he should like it. He likes Uncle Wu, of course, and he loves his dad, but—
He hates the way they all walk around like they’re preparing for a funeral. His dad’s funeral, his funeral, whichever it ends up being. It’s stupid. Lloyd’s lived on the streets for months, and in Darkley’s even longer. He wouldn’t have minded walking around like he’s doomed for misery then.
But now? When he’s got people who care, and a family?
Lloyd sets his mouth stubbornly. He doesn’t know much about destiny, or the prophecy, but he knows he’s not about to lose this. Not when he’s come so far, when he’s so close to having — to being someone worth having around.
No funerals, Lloyd promises himself. He can see this prophecy through — they both can, the two of them. You have to be alive to be a family, right?
“It’s okay,” he finally replies. “I’m alright, dad.”
And he’s gonna stay that way.
* * *
When Garmadon had thought about the final battle in the past, he’d expected the darkness. The destruction, the pain.
He hadn’t expected to survive.
“So you’re really giving up fighting, then?”
Glancing up at Lloyd, taller now yet still small enough to not quite fit his bright golden gi, Garmadon finds survival a very welcome surprise.
“Yes,” he says, returning his gaze to the flowerbeds Misako’s helped him put in the monastery garden. They’re coming along well, despite the recent fits of bad weather, and they do a fine job of making the monastery look homey. Unthreatening.
He hopes, at least.
“I think I’ve done enough fighting, for my part,” he continues. He gives Lloyd a wry look. “I’m not sure Ninjago could take much more of it from me, anyways.”
“I dunno,” Lloyd says. “It’s been getting pretty boring.”
Garmadon snorts. “Boring is something you should appreciate, son. Excitement isn’t always good.”
“No, but it isn’t bor—dull,” Lloyd mutters, crouching down to study the flowerbeds. Garmadon shakes his head in reply, sighing. He remembers being his son’s age once, yearning for the next thrill, even if it feels ages away now.
He’s got a whole lecture on appreciating the quiet moments on the tip of his tongue, too, when Lloyd speaks up again.
“We used to have these flowers at Darkley’s,” he says, tilting his head as he studies them. “Some of the boys tore them all up and threw ‘em at the window, but they were pretty before that."
Garmadon bites the inside of his cheek, his eyebrows furrowing. His expression softens as he spots the gentle way Lloyd handles the flower, carefully pushing it back to place. It never fails to baffle him how someone as gentle as Lloyd could’ve come from his beginnings, much less from Garmadon, but he treasures it.
“Snapdragons,” Garmadon says, instead. “Fitting flowers, for our family.”
Lloyd looks at him curiously, eyes bright with the light of suspicion, and Garmadon is tempted to tell him the full truth, then and there. But Lloyd is still so young, innocent and naive and barely come to terms with his place as the Green Ninja. The truth of their blood is a heavy one, and Garmadon can’t find it in himself to lay it on Lloyd’s shoulders today. No, his son is happy among humans, so a human he’ll let him be. Someday he’ll know he’s more, closer to the dragons he admires than he realizes, but not quite yet.
Miraculously, Garmadon has the time, now.
“If you stay after dinner, I can show you how they’re planted,” he offers. Lloyd nods, and Garmadon’s smile widens.
Destruction is in his blood, and he’d be blind to say it isn’t in Lloyd’s as well. Power is power, whether it’s bright and beautiful or stained in darkness, and Lloyd could shatter mountains as well as move them, if he wanted.
But Lloyd never moves to pull the flowers up, only watches them rustle slightly in the breeze, leaving them to grow a little bigger, a little brighter. Garmadon, for his part, watches his son, all bright eyes and the burnished gold hair of his grandfather, and reminds himself that one needs not be a master of creation to appreciate life.
* * *
Lloyd likes to think of himself as an optimist, for the most part. He’s at least good at pretending that he is one, with how many times he’s had to convince himself it’s worth it to get back up.
Right now, he’s trying to remember how he’s ever managed to convince himself, because this time, getting back up seems impossible.
Lloyd used to wonder, back during Morro, how far you had to push yourself to break like that. How far someone had to push you, to truly splinter. He thinks he might have found his answer, though his is less of a bitter hatred and more of an empty abyss of hurt.
It hurts to breathe. That would be a sign that something’s wrong, if Lloyd didn’t already have about sixty other signs that he’s in trouble. But the breathing thing is sticking out to him especially, right now. His lungs feel like they’re scraping against his ribs every time he tries to draw breath, bruised and stinging, and there’s a deep ache in his chest that grows worse by the minute.
He tries swallowing again, sand scraping down his throat as he does. He hisses out a breath instead of coughing, almost frightened that his lungs will give out completely if he does.
He says almost, because Lloyd isn’t sure what emotions he’s got left to feel anymore.
A lie. Pain starts numb, sometimes.
Lloyd’s chest spasms as he sucks in another breath, and he wishes the desert would swallow him whole. His father — his real father, who pushed him from the Cursed Realm and told him to return to light and living — would want him to stand back up. He’d beg him to, stress the importance of continuing on, of persevering. Stuff like that.
But if it wasn’t for his father, Lloyd wouldn’t have to get back up in the first place. If it wasn’t for his father, Lloyd wouldn’t be—
His eyes burn, stinging as he squeezes them tightly shut, and he tells himself it’s the sand.
Instead, he focuses on the ragged beat of his heart. He only knows it’s there because his chest throbs in pain with every pulse, but he latches onto the feeling and holds tight.
Still alive, he tells himself, even as every bit of him sings in agony and his lungs scream at him to stop. He’s still alive. His powers aren’t answering him but they will, he knows they will, he can’t disappear like he did with Morro. He can’t — he can’t leave it, not like this, not with his father — not like this. If he can’t stop Harumi, if he can’t save his father, if he can’t do anything else at all, he can at least do this.
Stay alive. Stay alive. Stay alive.
He’s never realized how long the nights out here are, before.
* * *
After everything, the light dies down and the Oni vanish, and Lloyd’s heart stops.
It shouldn’t be a surprise to Garmadon, who isn’t even sure his own heart beats now, but it is.
It’s not supposed to stop. There was a promise made, somewhere, to keep it beating.
It restarts before he has the chance to process what that even means, and the swell of relief is so foreign, Garmadon leaves before he even has the chance to ask Lloyd what he’d seen. He thinks to himself, that will be the end of it. The end of whatever tentative connection he has with the boy, whatever frayed and tattered threads of something they once had. Better to cut them away for good.
Lloyd’s not one to let things die, though. Garmadon should know that at least, the boy tells him.
“I know you like repeating yourself,” he mutters. “Letting go is different.”
“That’s not what this is,” Lloyd huffs back.
Garmadon rolls his eyes, the two of them drifting aimlessly down the Ninjago City garden paths. It’s secluded, the rest of the city still recovering, and Garmadon’s grateful for the quiet, even if it is awkward. Building any kind of bridge with the boy is difficult, if only because Lloyd stresses that they’re rebuilding a bridge, and Garmadon has no memory of any bridge to begin with.
He’s still sifting through jumbled emotions, sorting out what his place in this world was and is supposed to be, but he knows that the word son slips easier from his mouth than daughter ever did, so he figures he’s on the right path, at least.
“It’s about—” Lloyd pauses, his expression contorting. “It’s about surviving, I guess,” he grinds out.
Garmadon’s mouth curls into a grin. “Really. You were quite…vocal, that it was about more than that.”
“It is, it’s just—” Lloyd cuts off again, stopping them in a half-ruined section of garden still littered with remnants of concrete. “It’s the payoff, you know? Here.”
He bends down, brushing dust from a surviving scattering of flowers. He gently touches the edge of a petal, pushing the flower head toward the sun. “See?” he says. “After all that, it’s still alive.”
Garmadon stares at the delicate edges of the petal, smaller and more fragile than any of the buildings that crumbled beneath his rule. At Lloyd’s nod, he stretches his own fingers out toward it, his hand impossibly dark and calloused next to his son’s own small one. But he brushes his fingers over the petal edge nonetheless, almost surprised that it doesn’t decay beneath his touch. It’s soft, he notes, like the fragile skin of a newborn. Odd that it should’ve survived, out of everything else that perished.
“So it is,” he says, carefully. Lloyd says nothing, but there’s a ghost of a smile around his lips. They must make an odd sight, the pair of them crouched in the dirt in the recovering garden. There’s no use in sitting here and looking at the flower, no explanation Garmadon can offer himself, but he doesn’t leave. He can take the moment, he decides, to appreciate what Lloyd is trying to show him.
They too, after all, are still alive.
271 notes · View notes
rosiehunterwolf · 3 years ago
Text
Face the Music
Prompts: Karaoke
Word Count: 5,572
Characters: Cole, Kai, and Jay
Timeline: Between seasons 9 and 10
Trigger Warnings: Brief Mentions of Toxic Parent and Eating Disorder
Summary: If you ask Cole, there are some things in life better left forgotten. Especially embarrassing experiences that you would prefer not to talk about. They certainly shouldn’t be used as blackmail or as entertainment for others, and everyone should just learn to move on. Although maybe his friends aren’t the only ones that need to move on. 
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Link to read on Fanfiction.Net:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13904278/1/Face-the-Music
Cole burst onto the deck of the Bounty, swinging the door shut behind him. Zane looked up from the control panel, looking startled. “Cole?”
“Zane!” Cole ran over to him, gasping for breath. “Quick, what’s Kai’s cell phone password?”
Zane pulled back, raising an eyebrow. “What?”
“Don’t play coy with me, I know you have the passwords for everything programmed into your database! Now hurry, what is it!”
“I never denied that I did, but why would I tell you? That’s confidential information.” Glancing down at the cell phone, he asked, “Does Kai know you have his phone, Cole?”
“Uh… yeah, if it helps you sleep at night.”
Zane crossed his arms. “Cole…”
“Come on, Zane, help a friend out! It’s important!” “Cole, that is not my secret to tell. Unless it is an emergency, you don’t need to know.”
“But it is an emergency!”
“Oh really? Who’s in danger?”
“My pride,” he snapped. “C’mon, Zane, please, what do you want? I’ll do your dishes for a month! Or- or, uh, take patrol duties for the next three weeks. Hey, hey, what about cooking, you like that, right? I’ll buy you some new appliances!”
“Cole, you cannot bribe me-”
“Hey guuuuys,” Kai larked, popping his head through the door and sliding over to Cole. Before he could even react, the master of fire was plucking the phone out of his hands. “I’ll take that, thanks.”
“Give it back!”
“It’s my phone!”
“I didn’t give you permission to take that video!”
Kai batted his eyes innocently. “What video?”
Cole lunged for him. “I will kill you, spike head-”
“Gotta catch me first,” Kai shrilled, neatly ducking his arm and dashing back belowdeck, laughing maniacally.
“Thanks a lot, Zane. Who knows what he’ll do with that now?”
“I don’t understand. What is going on?”
Cole sighed slowly. “He’s got… a video. I need it to be deleted.”
“What kind of video?”
“Seriously Zane? Can’t you take a hint? I obviously don’t want to tell you.”
Zane just stared at him expectantly.
Cole rubbed his face in his hands. I can’t believe I’m doing this. “He still has the video from… from Laughy’s. With the Sons of Garmadon.”
Zane is smiling now, crossing his arms. “I don’t know why you are embarrassed to tell me, Cole. I was there, remember? I saw you sing-”
“Okay, okay, Zane, I get it! Just stop talking about it!”
“I don’t see why talking about it would be an issue-”
Cole lunged forward, pressing a hand over his mouth. “You don’t understand,” he hissed under his breath. “They’re everywhere. They’re obsessed with that video, and they’ve been dangling it over my head ever since we returned from the First Realm. They’re trying to blackmail me!”
“They?”
“Oh yeah, it’s not just Kai- Jay’s in on it too, the jerk. You think you know who your best friend is.”
“Cole, I think you’re overreacting, what could they possibly do with it? Everyone here already saw you sing, it’s fine.”
“You really think Lloyd, Nya and Pix have spared a second thought to think about me after everything they had going on here? I was hoping they had forgotten about it by now, but if Jay and Kai have their way-”
“I’m not going to help you steal Kai’s phone, Cole. If you need me for anything actually important, let me know.”
“This is important,” Cole yelled after him, but Zane was already gone.
Fine, he huffed. If no one is going to help me, I’ll do it myself.
---
“Hey Cole? Kai and Lloyd want me to play Fist-to-Face 3 with them, will you take patrol duty for me tonight?”
“Yeah?” Cole reclined in the kitchen chair, stretching his arms behind his head. “And why would I do that?”
“Oh, I dunno… perhaps because you wouldn’t want a certain… video to accidentally leak…” Jay waggled his phone teasingly in the air.
Cole stood up sharply. “You wouldn’t.”
“I dunno… would I? I guess we’ll find out.”
“Fine, fine, I’m going, I’m going,” Cole grumbled. “Want anything while I’m out?” “We’re almost out of Doritos. And can you get the strawberry Fanta?”
“Are you a heathen? Who drinks the strawberry?”
“It’s not for you,” Jay snapped. “And for your information, it tastes very nice.”
“Whatever. You at least gonna pay me for this, bozo?”
Jay slapped a twenty into his hand. “This is all I got on me. Buy yourself a little somethin’ with the change.”
Cole mock bowed. “Whatever you say, master.”
“Ah, come on, I’m not cruel, come join us when you get back.” As Cole walked out the door, he called after him, “I’ll save you some Bagel Bites!”
Cole rolled his eyes. He didn’t know how he got into situations like this.
He was really starting to hate that stupid video.
---
By the end of the week, which had been filled with similar scenarios, Cole had had it. I’m not going to take this slander anymore! They can’t just push me around like this, I’m the master of earth!
The monastery was buzzing with the chatter of his friends on the hot afternoon. They were all wearing swimsuits, and Lloyd opened the door, leaning out lazily as a wave of hot air wafted into the cool monastery.
“Stop standing there with the door open, nitwit, you’re letting all the hot air in,” Kai snapped, shoving him out the door, nearly sending him to the floor, before Zane caught him by the wrist with his usual lightning reflexes.
“Kai, there is no need to get physical.”
“Can it, Zane, I’m just playing around, right bud?” Kai slung his arm around Lloyd’s shoulder, ruffling his hair.
Lloyd shot him a glare. “Get off of me, you lump, I’m melting here. Are we going swimming or not?”
“Ouch, looks like someone skipped his coffee today. What’s wrong, baby boy, did I hurt your feewings?”
“You wanna get punched? ‘Cause I will not hesitate to punch you.”
“You wanna throw hands with me, bro? I’d prefer not to have a squished pancake as a brother, but if you say so.”
“As soon as I cool down a bit, you are toast.”
“You cool it, mister. Are you forgetting everything amazing I’ve ever done for you?”
“Don’t mind him,” Nya called to Kai, coming over to elbow Lloyd from the other side. “He gets grumpy when he’s hot.”
“I hate you both.”
Zane sighed. “I swear, it’s like the heat is melting their brains.”
Nya shrugged. “They must have like, low heat tolerance or something. Don’t ask me why they always get so loopy like this.”
“Hey, it’s like 100 degrees, don’t blame me if I’m a little uncomfortable!” Lloyd snapped, his words slurring slightly.
“Yeah, bud, even I think you’re starting to get to be a little much now. Come on, let’s get you in the water.”
As the team shuffled out the door, Jay turned back to face him. “Hey, Cole, aren’t you coming swimming with us?”
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute, just give me a sec.”
Jay shrugged, and Cole waited for a moment, until he heard the door click.
Finally! I thought they’d never leave.
Hurrying down the hallway, he popped his head into the bathroom, where Kai and Jay had just thrown their clothes into a pile on the floor when they had changed. Getting on his knees, he dug through it and pulled out Jay’s shorts, extracting his cell from it. Pulling a slip of paper out from his pocket, he quickly typed the numbers in, and…
The phone unlocked.
Cole broke into a grin, praising Jay’s inability to remember passwords and always writing them down somewhere where a very desperate earth ninja could find them.
He opened the camera app and deleted the video.
There. Halfway done.
Kai’s phone wasn’t in his pocket, so he snuck over to his room and found it charging on the nightstand. Biting his lip, he pulled out his phone and glanced at the camera footage he had captured the previous night.
It showed a bird’s eye view of the living room, and Kai was sitting on the couch, watching TV. As he reached for his phone, Cole zoomed in on the device and watched carefully as he typed in the code.
Okay. Cole repeated the same code on Kai’s phone.
Incorrect Passcode.
Cole felt panic flare inside him. What were the chances that Kai had changed his password in the one night since he’d filmed this?
“It didn’t work because I have one of those fingerprint ones, too.”
Cole whips around to see Kai standing in the doorway, Jay hovering behind him. “Jay told me you were lingering, and I just got a feeling, y’know? That you were up to something.”
Cole huffed, tossing him the phone. “Why won’t you just delete it, Kai? This has gone on for long enough.”
“I like the video, Cole. It puts a smile on my face on the… hard days.”
“Oh, spare me the pity card. I know plenty well that you have more than enough other ways to keep yourself entertained.”
“What about Jay?” Kai grabbed the lightning ninja by the shoulders, shaking him gently. “Think of your friend, Cole. He has no sense of entertainment, he needs something to keep him going.”
“Excuse me-”
“Oh please,” Cole snorted. “Stick Jay on Youtube and he’ll be entertained for hours. He gets distracted way too easily.”
“Oh come on, Cole, this is way better than Jay’s stupid cat videos-”
“I do not watch cat videos!”
“Don’t lie to me, zaptrap, you’re lame.”
“Dude, who’s side are you on?”
“Look guys, I don’t have time for this. Just delete the video, and we can be done with this whole thing.”
“No, that’s not how this is going to work. You’re going to go outside with the others, and forget this whole thing ever happened. Otherwise, this little video might end up on the internet.”
“What?” Cole shrieked. “You can’t do that, dude, it’s an invasion of my privacy!”
“Last time I checked, this was a video of Rocky Dangerbuff, not you. Is it you in this video, Cole?”
Cole felt his face heat as he scowled at them, and Kai and Jay burst into laughter.
Kai slapped a hand on his back. “If it makes you feel any better, it wouldn’t have worked anyway. You really think we’re dumb enough to keep the only copies of the video on our phones? You’d be searching for hours to delete all traces of it.”
Cole balked at him. “Seriously? How many copies did you make?”
Jay grinned. “You forgot this wasn’t a solo operation, dirtclod. I’m the tech guy around here. There’s no way you’ll be able to override my programming.”
Cole groaned, putting his face in his hands. “I hate you guys.”
“Hey, that’s what friends are for, right?” Kai laughed. “C’mon, dude, it’s hot, let’s go swim.” Cole reluctantly followed them out the door, grumbling.
“This won’t go on forever, you guys. Sooner or later, I’m gonna find a way to stop you.”
Kai laughed. “We’ll see about that, Cole, we’ll see.”
---
“Are you sure this is really something I wanna be getting involved in?” The nindroid asked, her glowing green eyes scanning the monitor screen.
“It’ll be fine, Pix, I promise. They might be a little annoyed at first, but within a couple days, they’ll have completely moved on to something else to make fun of. All you have to do is get rid of one measly video for me.”
“Well, I wouldn’t call it that, exactly. Jay went pretty deep with this program. But I think I’ve located the source material.”
“And?” Cole asked, placing his hands on the table and leaning forward. “Does that mean you can delete all the data?”
“Yes. Every known record of it developed into the Bounty’s database will be erased.”
“Do it, quick!”
Pixal turned to the computer again, and Cole held his breath as her fingers flew over the keys for a moment. Then, she pulled back.
“Is it done? Did you do it?”
“Yes. It’s gone.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” Cole sighed, slouching against the wall. “I’m so glad that’s finally over. Pix, you’re a lifesaver.”
A small smile played on her lips. “I do what I can.”
“Well, you’ve just saved me a lot of trouble. I owe ya one.”
“We’ll see. Anyways, if we’re done here, I’m going to go help Zane work on those hull repairs to the Bounty.”
“Thanks, Pix.”
When he walked down to the kitchen for dinner that night, for the first time in weeks he didn’t feel a constant dread hanging over his head.
---
The relief didn’t last long.
It was only the evening of the next day when Kai came marching into his room, Jay on his heels. Cole glanced over at them nonchalantly from where he was laying across his bed, reading a Starfarer comic. “Can I help you?”
“You know what you did, stop acting so innocent.”
Cole grinned, stretching. “What can I say, bro, I outplayed you.”
“You could never,” Jay snorted. “You had help!”
“Hey, two against one was never a fair game. Let’s just say I was evening the odds a little bit.”
“Who helped you?” Kai hissed, pointing at him. “Spill, now!” “Sorry fellas, but I’ve sworn to secrecy. You’ll have to find your information elsewhere.”
“It has to be either Nya, Pixal, or Zane,” Jay insisted. “Nya’s the only one with the advanced enough technical skills to be able to override me, and Zane and Pixal are attached to the system, so they can get pretty much anything they want with enough computer skills.”
Kai rolled his eyes. “Great job, sparky, now we've eliminated it down to three out of the four possible suspects. What amazing deduction skills.”
“Hey, I don’t see you doing any better! And it’s actually three out of five. We know it’s not Master Wu, either.”
Both Kai and Cole raised an eyebrow at that.
“Jay, you’re joking. Master Wu. Helped Cole. Delete a blackmail video?”
Cole snorted. “Zaptrap, if Wu ever found out about what was going on, he’d give us a stern lecture, make us meditate for a few hours, then, probably like, stick us on patrol duty for the rest of the night or something.”
“Shut up! Look, it doesn’t matter, alright? If you just tell us who it is, we’ll leave you alone.”
“Fat chance.” Cole got up out of bed and strolled past them, towards the door. “You don’t have anything against me anymore. That blackmail’s not gonna work anymore.”
“Who told you that?”
Cole stopped, turning towards Kai slowly. “What?”
“Who told you we didn’t have access to the video anymore?”
Cole gaped, glancing back and forth between Kai and Jay. “What!? That’s impossible, she-” he bit his lip sharply, cursing himself. “I mean… we deleted all copies of the video. How could you still have it?”
“Aha!” Jay gasped, pointing at him. “Did you hear that? He said she! Which means we’ve narrowed it down to Pixal or Nya!”
Cole ignored him, narrowing his eyes at Kai. “You’re bluffing. You don’t have the video.”
“Oh yeah? Jay, you still have it?”
The blue ninja stuck a hand into his pocket, and, pulling it out, flashed a small blue object between his fingers. Cole looked closer, and felt his stomach drop as he recognized what it was- a flash drive.
“Yep, it’s all in here! Even the most advanced computer codes will do nothing to reach our backup. Looks like you’ve run out of luck again, Cole.”
“Are you kidding me? This is impossible!”
“Come on, Cole- all we want to do is have a little fun with it. Let us keep the video, and we’ll leave you alone.”
“And if I try to get rid of it again?”
“Oh, I dunno, maybe it could find its way… onto social media.”
Cole nearly choked. “Kai! You wouldn’t!”
“Keep your nose out of it, and I won’t! C’mon, Jay, we’re done here.”
Cole flopped back down onto his bed. Social media. Kai couldn’t put the video on the internet. It would be all over the city by morning.
He had said he wouldn’t do it if Cole stopped trying to get rid of the video, but Cole didn’t trust that one bit. Now that the idea was planted in his head, Cole was afraid he could do it at any time.
There was no question about it. He had to destroy that flash drive.
---
Kai and Jay were out on the last evening patrol.
This was the time.
Glancing down the hallway to make sure no one was there, he eased open the door to Kai’s room and slipped inside.
He was fairly certain they would’ve kept the flash drive in Kai’s room, specifically to throw him off after he had seen Jay holding it earlier. Also, Kai’s room, while still a mess, wasn’t as bad as Jay’s, so Cole much preferred to search his, anyways.
But it was still going to be more difficult than he had hoped, he realized with a groan as he glanced around the room.
Kai’s bed had a small stack of comic books and magazines strewn across it, with more on the nightstand and even a few on the floor. His laundry had been mostly shoved into a corner, but a few lone shirts and socks had been left randomly. Most of his stuff appeared to be in bins that had been stuffed under the bed and in the corners, but there appeared to be no order to what was in them, just a hag-tag of random junk, save for one crate in the corner which was full to the brim with various weapons, leaving several of them spilling out just asking for a sliced toe in the morning.
The worst was the dresser, though- there were several hair products lined up, even though Cole knew he already had more than enough in the bathroom, a handful of letters, only a couple of them opened, some more comics, a couple empty cups, and enough earrings and other jewelry to last him a lifetime. Cole never understood why he needed so many. Sure, Kai had a ton of piercings, more than the rest of them combined, but Cole swore he had never seen him even wear half of these. Kai had almost as much jewelry, (or, as he liked to call it, “bling”) as he did hair products, which was really saying something.
Sighing, Cole walked over to search through one of the bins that looked like it may have had the techy stuff in it- or at least, the somewhat mechanical stuff- maybe- or, actually, not really, he had absolutely no idea what kind of system Kai had going on here.
Reaching in, he pulled out a tablet, a flashlight, a spare video game controller, a baseball cap, a worn stuffed dragon, a barrette that he was pretty sure belonged to Skylor- Cole blushed at that one, shoving the box away. These things were Kai’s. There could likely be things in here he didn’t want Cole to see.
He wasn’t trying to snoop, though- all he wanted to do was find the flash drive, and leave.
Turning away, Cole began to sift through another bin. A sword- small and uneven, but fairly solid- this one wrapped away with much more care than the others- had a label scribbled on that read “Kai’s first sword.” A photograph, ripped down the middle, the remaining side with a very young Kai hugging an even younger Nya, and a ripped shawl stained with blood that had never come out-
Cole jumped back. Okay, so maybe there was some sort of order to these boxes. And that one was none of his business. He wasn’t sure he even wanted to look any further, anyway. He didn’t doubt that Kai and Nya had been reserved about their lives before meeting them for a reason.
Cole was beginning to feel guilt weight down on his chest already, cold and heavy. He shouldn’t have seen that. He shouldn’t have seen any of this. He was blatantly disrespecting one of his closest friend’s privacy just to delete some stupid video he was embarrassed about.
I should go.
As he sped towards the door, he tripped over something and fell to the ground with a thump. Turning back, he saw it was a book that he had set aside while pulling things out of the bin, having spilled open after he tripped on it, allowing him to see that it wasn’t a book at all, but a photo album.
It was open to a page where Cole had his arm slung around a very grumpy-looking Kai, ruffling his hair, with Jay and Lloyd bent over laughing in the background. It was followed by a bunch of pictures of Kai with the worst bed hair Cole had ever seen- desperately reaching towards the camera, presumably to strangle whoever was snapping photos. Occasionally, one of the other ninja would pop in, holding him back for the photographer, or posing goofily next to the groggy fire ninja.
Cole felt a grin spread over his face. He remembered that day, when Kai had stayed up so late playing video games that he had forgotten about his hair in the morning- and the whole team had been more than eager to take advantage of the one time the fire ninja wasn’t looking so attractive. Kai had threatened to murder them in their sleep, but he had been laughing through it all, too.
That’s the same thing happening here, Cole realized. I’m being a baby about this. They’re just playing around with me. Like I haven’t done the same to them a thousand times.
Cole neatly closed the book and slid it back into a bin, leaving the room with his heart feeling significantly lighter.
It hadn’t been a moment too soon, either, as when he was walking down the hallway, he passed Kai and Jay returning from patrol.
“Everything okay, Cole?” “I’m fine,” he said quickly, too quickly. Luckily, Jay didn’t seem to notice. Kai raised his eyebrow slightly but didn’t press the issue. “Whatcha’ up to?”
“Just heading to bed.”
“Sweet dreams, little glow worm.”
Jay burst into snickers, and Kai grinned wickedly. Cole put his face in his hands, and brushed past them. Okay, so maybe he wasn’t quite as over this as he thought.
---
The next morning, he was awoken by a knock on his bedroom door. Pulling on a tank top, he opened the door to find Zane standing there.
“What’s up?”
The nindroid had an apologetic look on his face, holding up his cell phone. “Have you checked social media yet?”
“No, why?”
“Kai posted your karaoke video.”
“He what?!” Cole shrieked, ripping the phone out of his hand. There, right under Kai’s grinning profile picture, was the video of him singing at Laughy’s.
“That dumbass,” Cole cried, flopping back onto his bed. “Do you know how bad this is? And it’s not just any old social media account, it’s Kai’s. The guy has like, seven million followers on Ninjagram, and almost as many on Chirp and ChatSnap. This will ruin me.”
“I’m sorry, Cole. I didn’t think he would do this.”
“I didn’t either. He promised he wouldn’t, as long as I didn’t try to delete the data!”
“...Didn’t you, though?”
Cole glowered at him. “Well, maybe, technically, I did, but he didn’t catch me! How would he know?”
“Cole, what kind of ninja headquarters would this be if we didn’t have security cameras?”
“Shit! Why would he be checking that? Oh, I’m never going to forgive him for this.”
“Cole, forgive me, but I think you’re overreacting a little. Sure, it’ll probably get a few laughs, but in a couple hours, everyone will have moved onto the next thing. You’ll be fine.”
“You don’t know that! I’m not just like some random cat video, I’m a famous ninja! Pretty much everyone knows about me, they’re going to linger on this for a while, trust me.”
“Cole,” Zane said patiently, amusement sparkling in his voice. “I think you’ll survive. Come have some breakfast, that always makes you feel a little better.”
Cole opened his mouth to argue, but Zane was already walking out of the room, so Cole reluctantly followed.
Cole sat down at the table, glaring down into his lap, as Zane slipped him a plate of waffles. He couldn’t even make it all the way through his meal before Kai and Jay inevitably showed up.
“Hey Cole,” Kai smiled, “wonderful morning, isn’t it?”
“You shut your dumb mouth,” Cole snapped. “I don’t even want to look at you.”
“Woah, someone’s feisty.”
“I saw what you did! I can’t believe you did that.”
“I can’t believe you went through my stuff,” Kai barked back, and, despite himself, Cole felt himself flinch. “I was just upholding my side of the agreement.”
“Hey, Cole,” Jay interjected. “Look on the bright side. You’re practically famous! The video already has five million views!”
“I’m already famous, you moron, which, in this situation, makes it even worse.”
Jay blinked, obviously not expecting the hostility of his response. “Cole, chill, it’s just a-”
“Hey guys!” Cole looked up to see Lloyd, Nya, and Pixal walking in. Lloyd grinned as he caught sight of Cole’s plate. “Aww, Zane, you made waffles? Did you buy-”
“Yes, Lloyd, there is plenty of whip cream.”
“I’m just checking! It wouldn’t be the first time I was a few minutes late and some hogs ate all the whip cream.” He shot a glare at Jay, who shrugged nonchalantly.
“Ya snooze, ya lose, green machine. It’s not my fault you have no sense of timing.”
“I have plenty of sense of timing! I’m just…”
“Easily distracted,” Nya chimed in.
“Am not! You were just as distracted as I was!” “You’re the one who showed it to me just as we were trying to go to breakfast!” “Well, you didn’t have to watch it, you could’ve just walked away!”
“How could I not? That one’s a keeper-”
“What are you two on about?” Kai laughed.
“There’s this video blowing up on the internet-” Pixal began.
“You have got to be kidding me,” Cole groaned. He glared at Kai. “Now look what you’ve done. You’ve gotten them-” he pointed an accusatory finger at Lloyd and Nya- “laughing at it too.”
“More like them and the rest of Ninjago-”
“Seriously? I can’t with you,” Cole fumed, then promptly spun around and stormed off to his bedroom, locking the door. He flopped onto his bed face first and yelled into his pillow.
He had wanted to laugh this whole thing off. He really had. But how was he expected to be chill when it was all over the internet?
Part of him was just angry with himself, though. Why did he let this rile him up so much? Why was he so upset? Zane was right, it was just another random video, wasn’t it?
Why was it the end of the world if people saw him sing?
---
“Back straighter, Cole.”
Cole flinched at the hit before it came, and the man rolled his eyes. “How do you expect to ever perform well if you can’t even have good posture?”
“I’m trying dad, but I’m tired. We’ve been doing this for hours. Can I go have lunch now?”
“It’s not time for that yet, Cole. First, we need to work on this piece more. Now, start again, from measure twenty-one.
He shuffled through the pages of music, and as he began to sing, all he could imagine was that stern face peering down at him, and all of a sudden his voice was coming out wobbly.
“Tone shape, Cole! You need to keep a consistent tone. Don’t let it sound wavery and messy.”
Cole’s stomach growled loudly, and he flinched at the look on his father’s face. “Please, dad, I’ll be able to concentrate more if I’ve eaten.”
“Fifteen minutes,” his father snapped. “Then right back to work.”
Cole remembered running to the kitchen, worried there wouldn’t be enough time, and eating as much food as he could manage. But it had been too much, his father would be angry with him, what was he going to do-
He had thrown most of it up in the bathroom later that night.
“Cole, you need to try harder. Singing and dancing of just “average” quality aren’t going to cut it when you become part of the next generation of the Royal Blacksmiths.”
“But dad, I don’t want to be a Royal Blacksmith. I don’t even like to sing.”
“Nonsense! This is a family legacy, boy! Do you wish to break such noble tradition just because you weren’t willing to work hard enough?”
“...No, dad.”
“That’s what I thought. Now, back to work.”
---
A knock. “Hey, Cole, can I come in?”
Cole pulled his face out of the pillow, frantic to find it wet. He quickly wiped at his eyes before getting to his feet and trodding to the door, unlocking it and opening it slowly. Kai stood there.
Great.
“What do you want?”
To his surprise, the red ninja flinched. “Can we talk?”
Cole turned and laid across his bed. “What’s there to talk about?”
Kai took a seat on the edge of the bed, keeping his distance from Cole. “Are you… are you actually angry about this? Like, for real? I thought we were joking around.”
Cole didn’t answer, merely grunting into his pillow.
Kai hesitantly scooted a little closer. “I’m sorry. I would’ve stopped if I knew it was making you so uncomfortable. I really wish you had said something about it.”
Cole shrugged. “Well, I didn’t.”
“I’ll take it down, if you want.”
“What?”
“Like, I know it’s too late now,” he said hurriedly, “and that a bunch of people have already seen it, that I’m not fixing my mistake by doing this, but- I can take the video offline now, so at least no one else sees it.”
Cole was about to thank him, when a sudden urge flowed over him. “Y’know what,” he said, sitting up, “No.”
“Huh?” “Don’t bother,” Cole told him. “It’s no big deal. It’s just some stupid video.”
“I thought you were upset.”
“I was. And still am, a little, if I’m being honest. But I’m tired of spending so much time worrying about what others think of me. It’s exhausting, and no fun. It’s time I started thinking about how I view myself.”
“Are you sure? Because I know you hate singing-”
“I don’t, though. I used to like it.”
“What happened?”
Cole shrugged halfheartedly. “Let’s just say… my dad didn’t make the right decisions. Pushed me too hard to be something I wasn’t. Kind of hard to enjoy singing with him barking over my shoulder about it every spare second. Basically sucked all the joy out of it.”
Kai swung his feet back and forth. “That sounds rough. I wonder if my dad would’ve been anything like that, if he… if he’d stayed.”
“You were forced, in a way, too. Forced to grow up too quickly, to raise your sister on your own.”
“Yeah, I guess I was.” He shot him a small grin, although Cole could tell it was forced. “We’re alike in that way.”
“I wish we weren't,” Cole sighed. “No one deserves to go through that.”
Kai laughed dryly. “I learned a long time ago that life’s never been fair.”
“Have you talked to your dad at all, recently?”
“...Not really. I mean, apart from letting him know we were alive and stuff… after the First Realm.”
“Maybe you should reach out to him. Before it’s too late.”
“I know, I know… but I’m not really sure if I want to. I don’t know if that makes me sound like an awful person, but… he was never there for me. They were never there. I know it wasn’t their fault, but… it still stings. Those years, before I came here, were some of the hardest of my life. And I was just a kid! How was I… how was I supposed to…”
“It’s okay,” Cole put an arm around his shoulder and pulled him close. “I’m not sure if I want to forgive my father, either.”
“I wouldn’t blame you. What kind of person treats their kid like that? Judges them so harshly? Oh gosh, why didn’t you say something, Cole, I’m really sorry about that video.”
“I told you, it’s fine. You guys aren’t my father. I know you won’t judge me for my quirks. And, if you want to laugh at me, if the people of Ninjago want to laugh at me, that’s fine. So I’m weird. So I sing stupid songs about glow worms and sing out of key and put on really, really bad disguises. You can tease me all you want, but really, you love me for it, and I’m done doubting that. That’s what true family does.”
Kai smiled sadly at him. “I’m sorry that you didn’t find that out sooner, Cole. You’re an amazing person, and you deserve a family who will treat you like one.”
Cole smiled, slinging an arm around his shoulder. “I already have one.”
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dibs4ever · 3 years ago
Text
After the latest Nightwing issue I got this thought about Dick’s parents. Before they were together......
He said she said
John splashed water on his face, his Icy blue eyes reflecting at him.
He could also see Meili Lin approaching him from behind. She had slipped on her silk robe before wrapping her arms around him, hugging his backside
“Thank you.” She whispered “The gentle love...I needed it after what Tony puts me through.” She said softly
Jon turned to face her “No Thanks necessary. I’m glad I could make you feel better.”
She could read right through him “You love her. Don’t you? You feel guilty?”
Jon looked up at her questionably “Love who?” He released her and sat on the edge of the bed. She stayed out in front of him
“Mary Lloyd.” She continued
Jon let out a chuckle that was drawn up of both nerves and fake acting to draw away suspicion “Mary is my trapeze partner. We aren’t dating. What do I have to feel guilty over?”
Meili Lin moved to sit beside him “Cause you wished you were more.”
Jon looked at her for a long while “Mary.” He sighed “Is it that obvious? We can’t ever be though” he waved
Meili grabbed his hands “Why not?”
Jon shrugged “Mary is-“ he looked off in thought “Mary is amazing, she’s smart and talented, she picks up on routines like it’s nothing. She is great at communicating with the audience. She’s insanely smart with math and science which you’d be surprised how much that helps with putting together routines and she’s honestly the most beautiful person I’ve ever met both inside and out.” The smile on Jon’s face grew wider and wider with every passing word he spoke about Mary.
“And you feel you aren’t honorable enough for her?” Meili asked
Jon shook his head “I don’t think -I know. Mary deserves the best life possible and I can’t give that to her. Besides--she has a boyfriend back home. A guy her parents approve of. They're trying to get him to convince her to leave the circus.” he explained
Three days later Melili was sitting in the bleachers Tony was observing practice and she had been instructed to sit there still with her head down.
That didn't mean she couldn’t watch her two favorite acrobats practice though. She was in awe of the pair. Jon had mentioned the other night that the two had only been working together for a little over a year yet you'd never know it. The way they moved on the trapeze was as if they were working with one mind. Somehow they were connected. Reading each other without words needing to be spoken. They were graceful and swift. Performing so beautifully together by watching them you almost felt as if you were intruding on a romantic moment.
She couldn't help. but listen as the pair climbed down the post, their feet safe on the ground floor “You were great Mary the way you jumped off that post, whew you got more guts than I do.” Jon said pushing his dark wavy hair back
She smiled “Well I can say the same for you, Grayson, I know when I jump you’ll always catch me”
Jon grinned at her “You’ve got that right. I will always catch you, Mary. And if I ever don’t? Well, it’s cause I’m falling along with you.”
Mary laughed lightly “Please with those muscles? I can’t imagine you ever dropping me.”
Jon flexed “Oh these Ol’ things? If you think my catching you is impressive you should see the other things they’re capable of.” He winked
Mary smiled, rolling her eyes “Oh Jon, what am I gonna do with you?” She bopped his nose with her index finger
He chuckled “Why don’t you tell me after I bring us back some waters?”
She nodded “Sure it’ll give me time to think of an answer.”
Mary watched him walk out of the tent before noticing Melili eyeing them. Mary strode over to her sitting beside her. They’d had a handful of conversations -enough to be friends.
“How’d we look from down here? Think it’ll be good in the show tonight?” Mary asked hopefully
Melili nodded “You two were fantastic.”
Mary smiled, the girl had a gorgeous smile. One that could warm anyone’s heart. Her smile alone allowed Melili to see why Jon was so smitten with her.
“Jon” Mary sighed blissfully “He’s an amazing performer. He has more experience than I do. He’s a 3rd generation acrobat. His grandfather was among some of the very first circus performers. Me? I’m just a gymnast-ballerina who didn’t get into dance school after High school so I opted to join the circus to follow my performer dream instead.”
Melili shook her head “Those American schools don’t know what kind of talent they passed up.” She paused “So you like working with Jon?”
Mary nodded “Whats not to like? In fact, I love it. Jon is caring. He’d give the shirt off his back to help someone in need. He’s dedicated to his work, he’s funny and great at comforting people. Not to mention he is ridiculously charming and handsome. I don’t think I’ve yet to meet someone who doesn’t like him” She added
Melili smiled “So what’s stopping you?”
Mary shrugged “Fistly I don’t know if he feels the same. I’m almost certain he doesn’t. Come on a 3rd generation acrobat vs. the girl who’s 3 years younger than him and ran away to the circus as an act of rebellion when her family told her she had to go to college since she didn’t get into
Dance school? Plus he’s way too good-looking for me.”
Melili shook her head “I don’t know about that. You’re breathtaking “
Mary smiled down at her feet “That’s very kind of you.”
“Your boyfriend isn’t why you wouldn’t work?” Melili asked
Mary shook her head “I like my boyfriend a lot but I mostly am with him hoping it’ll help me forget about my little crush on Jon.
So far it’s not working” she let out a small chuckle
Melili tilted her head “Why don’t you just tell him?”
Mary quickly shook her head “Oh no, and ruin our amazing partnership. Look Jon ...he sleeps around. Not in a bad way, I know he respects the women he does get with. He’s not out there hooking up with random audience members at every city we visit -although he could if he wanted to. But he’s never tried anything with me....kinda a dead give away he doesn’t like me like that.”
Melili furrowed her eyebrows “You mean you two have never-“ she wiggled her finger
Mary shook her head “No—-even if I kinda want to. Which is weird for me cause I have this thing where I can only have that sort of attraction to people I REALLY like-not sure if there’s a word for it. I don’t even have that attraction towards my boyfriend. Which makes me feel so guilty” she threw her head back
The girls watched as Jon reentered the tent, two full water bottles in hand. “Melili thanks for listening to me rant. I don’t have many close friends being on the road all the time.”
Melili smiled “No problem. If I can give you a word of advice before you start rehearsing again?”
Mary nodded “Please do”
“Tell him how you feel” Melili nodded toward Jon who was waiting at the trapeze post, giving the two girls privacy “You never know, you might uncover why he treats you so different than other girls.”
Mary flashed Melili a smile before standing and making her way back to the ring to join Jon.
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 5 years ago
Text
When the Weight Comes Down - 4
Warnings: non-consent sex (series); nothing for this chapter
This is dark! (biker) Steve and explicit. 18+ only.
Series Synopsis: Your father’s a drunk, your mother a recluse, and you’re just another small town girl in Birch.
Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown
Note: Hope you’re having as much fun with this as I am. Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)
I really hope you enjoy. ����
<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!
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Chapter Four: Twist My Arm
Culled and wooed, bitten, chewed It won't hurt if you don't move
💀💀💀💀
Your mother was awake when you got home but didn’t acknowledge you as she rinsed out your father’s empty beer cans and tossed them in the bin. Your father on the other hand snored in his recliner as the television continued to blare. You said nothing as you retreated to your room.
You set your alarm early and laid down in your old tee with the pink teddy bear on the front. You slept in spurts, jolting awake as your dream returned to the bar. With you trapped in the dim place and cornered by dark shadows. Your little digital clock roused you for good and you tiptoed to the bathroom.
You showered, dressed in a pair of jeans and a blouse with little frills along the neckline and sleeves beneath a sheer grey cardigan. You grabbed your boxy purse and shoved your wallet inside along with the pile of bills from the kitchen counter. Your mother was awake too but still silent as she ate a bowl of yogurt and granola. You left her like that.
The bank was mostly empty when you arrived. You went to the teller and paid a portion of each bill. You’d have to wait until your next check to cover the rest. Another call to the hydro company and hopes that you’d have hot water for the last half of the month.
You stopped at the diner for breakfast. You didn’t have the stomach for more than eggs and toast.Or the pockets. You had a tea and left a tip you’d regret. You were back on the street just after ten but had little desire to return home. Yet, staying in town was a prospect you weren’t fond of either.
You crossed the street and waved at Babs through the window as you passed the bakery. She smiled and looked back to her customer. You continued onto Lloyd’s and dipped inside. The man, Lu, you’d heard the girl call him, you were sure, sat at his counter with small glasses at the end of his nose and a book open.
“You again?” He remarked as he looked up. 
“Hi,” You said softly. 
He smiled and you quickly scurried between the aisles. You stopped before a shelf of notepads bound in leather. You weren’t sure what you were looking for; anything to keep your mind off of yourself; your family; Steve.
You couldn’t afford the large journal with its thick cover or the glass pens with the swirled handles. You opened a how-to guide on calligraphy and tried to calculate what you would be paid and what you owed. It might be a fun hobby. 
You went to the counter and hesitated. The old man didn’t look up from his book but you didn’t know if he heard you as when you stepped closer, he flinched.
“Miss?” He blinked at you and marked his page.
“Do you… offer credit?” You asked shyly.
“You got any old books? I’ll exchange credits for anything you got.” He said. “As long as it’s intact.”
“Oh, really?’ You smiled. “Okay, thank you.”
“Your welcome,” He said warmly.
“Sorry, I don’t… I can’t buy anything today but I’ll be back,” You offered.
“No problem,” He assured you and picked his book back up. “You have a good day.”
You left and thought of the box of books beneath your bed. That old copy of Moby Dick you never finished could go and the harlequin romances you’d hoarded from the thrift shop. You hadn’t touched those since high school and now you hid them in shame.
Your mind floated away as your feet headed towards your house. The rumble of engines sounded from across the street but your mind was eons away. You were only brought back to earth by the sharp rev of a motor right beside you. You glanced to the curb, the tire pressed to it, and then its owner.
“Hey,” Steve revved again and drew up his bike parallel to the pavement. “You didn’t forget about our ride, did you?”
“It’s not noon,” You looked at your watch. 
“Close enough.” He said. “We can go now.”
You peered up and down the sidewalk. Those who had been walking behind you had crossed to avoid the biker before you as others stood outside shop doors and watched nervously. You shrugged and shoved your hands in your jean pockets.
“I should go home first,” You said. “Tell my ma--”
“You don’t need to go all that way.” He turned off his bike and reached into his jacket. He pulled out his phone. “Give her a call and we’ll head out.”
You stared at his phone and chewed your bottom lip. You took it carefully and stared at the numbers on the screen. You dialed slowly and brought it up to your ear. You prayed she didn’t answer. Please be busy, please be busy.
“Hello?” Your mother’s voice chimed from the other end. You greeted her and told her it was you. “Why are you calling me?”
“I just wanted you to know I won’t be home for a while,” You looked at Steve. Better she didn’t know why though she’d figure it out soon enough. “I just didn’t want you worrying.”
“Okay,” She said tritely. “Bye.”
She hung up so sharply you were stunned as the line went dead. She was still mad at you. You handed Steve his phone back. You had hoped at least you could have told him she needed you home to help her with something but you hadn’t been on the call long enough for it to be a convincing lie.
“Did mommy say you could go?” He teased. You blanched and kicked your toe into the pavement.
“I’m not a child,” You whispered.
“Huh?” He said. “Sorry, I didn’t hear that.”
“I said,” You swallowed as you looked up. “I’m not a child.”
“I know,” He reached back and unbuckled the saddle bag. “Then act like it, doll.”
He flipped the leather flap up and nodded over his shoulder as he adjusted his perch on the bike. You grabbed the helmet and tried to recall how he had done up the strap the day before. You figured it out after a few tried but he grabbed your arm before you could climb on.
“If you’re gonna be my girl, you gotta start using your words,” He said. “But use them wisely, yeah?”
“I… I’m not your girl,” You struggled with him.
He chuckled and his hand flew up to your chin. He squeezed your jaw as he made you look at him.
“You know who I am? What this badge means?” He tapped his jacket with his other hand. “What I say, goes.”
You grabbed his wrist as you trembled.
“I don’t want to go,” You struggled with him. “Please.”
“If I have to get off this bike…” He warned. “You think anyone is gonna stop me?”
You gulped and thought back to the girl from the bookstore. She was braver than you and yet she hadn’t stopped Bucky last night. She had abided his errant hands and stolen kisses. You remembered her words. ‘Good luck’.
“Doll, I haven’t mistreated you, have I?” He let go. “I’ve been nice, so why don’t you get on and let’s head out.”
You nodded and he tilted his head. You cleared your throat and gave your ascent. He smirked and you grabbed his shoulder to hoist yourself over the small seat on the back of the bike. He reached back and pushed your knees against him. You wrapped your arms around him quickly and he turned the keys.
“You ever been to the city?” He asked as he rolled the bike out into the street. You clung tighter to him as the engine ripped through Birch and announced your departure.
💀
Your father had taken you to the city once as a child. You remembered it as gargantuan buildings and flashing lights. A beacon compared to Birch and its grim streets. The windy ride had left your cheeks numb and your thin cardigan did little to protect you. Steve pulled into an underground lot, the type you’d only ever seen on TV and he parked between two shining cars.
You got off and handed him your helmet. He hung both on the handle bar. He turned to you as you backed away but he caught you and drew you back.
“I didn’t get a kiss,” He pulled you close. He bent and you turned your head so he only kissed your cheek.
“I… Steve…”
“It’s okay to be nervous,” He raised his hand to cradle your face and make you look at him. “I’ll show you what to do.”
He pressed his lips to yours and you closed your eyes. His lips moved against yours and he poked you with his tongue until you opened your mouth. He hugged you tighter as he kissed you deeper and you weren’t sure what else to do but stand there. He parted gently.
“Just do what I do,” He purred and kissed you again. You tried to mimic him as best you could and he hummed before he drew away. “Mmm, like that.”
You were stunned. Shaking. He seemed pleased by it and turned you as he wrapped his arm around you. He led you through the lot, around the cars, and up a set of concrete steps. You found yourself in a large mall; you’d never been to one of those before.
“Oh,” You looked around at the shop windows. “Oh.”
Your purse felt even lighter and held back a cringe. You let him guide you as you shuffled over the tiled floor. He stopped you by a cushioned bench and faced you.
“Why don’t you have a look around?” He said. “I’ve got something to deal with but I’ll find you.”
Your eyes rounded and you frowned at the glowing monikers and glaring sale signs.
“I don’t-- I’ll get lost,” You said.
“It’s fine, you won’t,” He assured you. “Just stay inside. There are maps if you need them. A directory just around the corner.”
“Okay,” You knew there was no arguing with him. “Will you be long?”
“Shouldn’t be,” He rubbed your arm. “You’ll be okay, doll.”
He kissed you again, lighter this time. He reluctantly left you and when he disappeared around the corner you dared to look around. Other shoppers passed by without regard, as if you were invisible. You were used to that.
After a lot of hesitation, you found your way into a clothing shop and glanced around at the hangers. You checked a tag on a shirt you liked and gasped. You peeked over at the employee who had offered to help you but she seemed uninterested now. You quickly left and followed the smell of cinnamon to the food court.
You sat at a table hidden behind a fake fern and placed your purse on it. You pulled out your wallet and counted what was left in your wallet. You doubted you could afford a soda here. You packed it back up and dropped the bag on your lap as you leaned your elbow on the table. You read the little news bumper running across a screen mounted beside a Chinese food outlet.
You watched the clock in the corner; half an hour dragged by. You were surprised as Steve sat across from you and you perked up from your daze. He had a small white bag that he slid over to you. You stared at him over it.
“Go on,” He said.
“You didn’t have to--”
“Just open it.” He ordered.
You pursed your lips and looked inside the bag. You lifted the small box out of it. You carefully slid the lid off and a phone, much like his own, sat inside.
“It’s already set up,” He said. “It’s all yours.”
“I…” You blinked at the screen. “I can’t… afford--”
“I’ll take care of you,” He crossed his arms over the table. “Doll, I know you’re smart. You understand. I want to take care of you. Like your ma and pa never did. Don’t you want someone?”
You lowered your eyes and picked at the loose stitches that held the handle of your purse in place. You shrugged and your leg jiggled under the table. 
“There’s a case, too,” He said. “But if you want a different one, we can look around.”
You stared at your old blouse, your faded jeans, the small bleach stain by the knee. You felt completely out of place. A matchstick girl.
“I can’t--”
“I know what it is. You been taking care of them so long you can’t even think of someone doing the same for you.” He said. “You don’t gotta take care of them forever, doll.”
“I do though,” You countered as you looked up. “If I don’t--”
“They don’t know what they got,” Steve urged. “You’re too good to them.”
“You don’t know,” You frowned. “You can’t.”
“Are you that worried about them?” He asked. “You know, if you left, they’d find their way. They’re adults, like you, right?”
“No, no, my ma, she can’t leave the house and my pa…” You clamped your lips shut, embarrassed. “I don’t wanna talk about them anymore.”
“Well, I just think you should be as good to yourself as you are to them.” He said. “But I’ll be happy if you just let me be good to you.”
You chewed your lip and looked down at the phone. You’d never had anything like it before. You never had anyone to call anyway. You carefully reached into the bag and pulled out the other slender box; a phone case with a daisy on it, like the dress you’d worn the night before. You glanced up at Steve and he raised a brow.
“It’s up to you, doll,” He lowered his voice as he leaned over the table. “How good I am to you.”
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Note
Hello! If you don't mind me asking, are you planning on watching House of the Dragon? I'm personally unsure about it. I was cautiously optimistic about it since D&D are not involved, but the recent casting news have been ugh disappointing imo. What do you think?
Hey anon! Sorry to say I kind of mind you asking because my inbox is still closed (to everyone except my secret Santas, which is why the ask page is accessible at all), but then I realized it’s possible if you’re on the mobile app only, you haven’t seen said note in my askbox, or my FAQ, or anything of the sort. And with older metas of mine being reblogged recently, it’s possible you may be confused. (I hope you’re on mobile only and not just ignoring my requests.) So I wanted to inform you of that... but also, y’know, I kind of wanted to make a post about the HotD cast anyway? And this ask is as good a prompt as any... so, you’re lucky, but please don’t push your luck. ;)
So, straight up: I currently have no plans to watch House of the Dragon. HBO is not getting any of my goddamn money, I don’t trust like that. And hunting down illegal livestreaming sites is a pain in the ass and I regret ever doing it for GoT, as well as regretting getting drunk every weekend enough to dampen my senses to ever tolerate that show. Yeah it’s different showrunners and writers, I know. It’s still (mostly) the same executives at HBO and even if the pervert producer is gone (or is he?), you know they still just want to sell sex and violence and dragons to an audience that thinks fantasy is for geeks.
Also, considering that Fire & Blood’s story of Dance of the Dragons has very little actual narrative or dialogue, and the historical record is deliberately untrustworthy, that gives them pretty much full rein to do whatever they like with the story and characterization and words without even being slightly obliged to GRRM at all. Furthermore, since the story is wholly political with virtually none of the magical side of ASOIAF (excepting dragons), and honestly does not have much in the way of themes or depth that main ASOIAF or even D&E has, I think it will be very hard for an adaptation to show even those brief sparks of quality that used to make me wistful GoT couldn’t be that good all the time and eventually just made me frustrated and depressed. Note I do like the history and characters of the Dance despite myself, despite its many many many textual issues, but I don’t need to see an adaptation, I have a very visual imagination. I don’t watch a lot of television to begin with, I don’t see why I should start again with this.
However, I’m not going to avoid spoilers or discussion, and I’ll probably follow the show the tumblr way, through gifsets and video clips and people bitching on their blogs etc. If, somehow, by some miracle of good screenwriting and acting, the show manages to transcend its source material, I’m sure I will be informed. And then, if and only if then, I may try watching. (Without, of course, giving HBO any of my goddamn money.) We shall see.
(Though I certainly don’t know why anyone in Targ standom would ever watch a Dance adaptation considering almost every Targaryen and everyone else in the story is terrible except Helaena and the kids, and considering how the story ends, unless y’all are gluttons for punishment? (I do not comprehend hatewatching, sorry.) It’ll probably be fun at first to see the adventures of those “precious silver douchebags” (to borrow a friend’s tag), but eventually rocks fall, everyone dies, including the girlboss you know you’ll hope the story will be changed enough that she succeeds. Just letting you know now, she won’t.)
That said. I’ve been following the casting news and I think the hate/fear/wild screaming is entirely overblown. Yeah, I know, but wait, just listen. On Friday I officially welcomed @naomimakesart to the “favorite character is now played by an actor who looks nothing like most fanart and is mostly known for wildly different roles” club. I still remember that day in September 2009 when my brother texted me “yarp”... and that right there is the thing. Yeah. Rory McCann looks very little like most pre-GoT Sandor fanart... but many fans grew to love him anyway. (There are some who never did, of course. And yeah the character went off the rails by the end, but truly, who didn’t. Having seen his audition, having spoken to him and heard him wistfully talk about book scenes he loved, I’m convinced if Rory had only been given Sandor’s actual scenes and such, he would’ve killed it. Sigh. Deep, deep sigh.)
And Rory isn’t the only one. Neither of the actors for Jaime and Cersei were considered “beautiful” enough at first. I recall very clearly people bitching about Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (about his nose particularly?) because they had wanted Tarzan-era Travis Fimmel to be Jaime. (Seeing people bitch because current-Fimmel isn’t playing Daemon made me laugh out loud for both BEYONCE?! meme -type “why would you ever cast him omg he doesn’t fit my headcanon Daemon at all”, and amazing amounts of fandom flashbacks.) Lena Headey was “too square-jawed”, “too mean-looking” (since at the beginning you should never be able to guess she’s evil), “too dark-complected”, “too mannish”, not at all attractive enough. (Tricia Helfer was the most common “but I wanted” for Cersei, btw.) And of course “they don’t remotely look like twins, ugh!” Note, there’s receipts for all of this, none of it is made up. (Unfortunately.) Those two actors are just the ones whose casting wank I recall most clearly, particularly because oh how the turn tables.
Also. You know, there’s a post with Matt Smith and Mark Simonetti’s TWOIAF Daemon going around with shrieks of horror... and I’m finding it maddening in a “am I crazy? am I  the crazy one???” way, because Matt looks like the painting. Their features are not that dissimilar.
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Same deepset eyes. Same cheekbones of doom. Same thin lips. Same protruding chin. Same high forehead. Same invsible eyebrows ffs. Matt has a squarer jaw, and a longer more rectangular face, and a wider nose, but considering that Daemon’s features are not described in the text, and this is the only official ASOIAF artwork that shows Daemon’s face straight on, I can for sure see why he was probably shortlisted to begin with. And that’s not even getting into to his role in The Crown, which I’ve heard is very well played with politics and palace intrigue... and if you doubt Smith can play seductive/roguish and/or evil (depending on how you LARP as a Westeros historian), or look good with long hair... well. I do not want to watch the movie, but this trailer is disturbingly enlightening.
And as for Rhaenyra... y’all know this show is starting at the beginning of the story, right? When she’s a teenager? Not a voluptuous MILF? Yeah, Emma D’Arcy doesn’t look like a Magali Villeneueve painting (though who does, good lord), but you know who she does look remarkably like? Harry Lloyd.
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Same jawline. Same nose. Same thin lips. Same sharp cheekbones. Notably, same kind of sharp cheekbones and deep-set eyes as Matt Smith. HBO evidently has a concept of a “Targaryen look” that’s a little bit quirkier than supermodel-Greek statue-gods on earth, yeah, fine. But it’s consistent, and they look like family, and that-- that is good casting.
And yeah, in a few months to a year or so, you’ll see them in costume and wigs and makeup, you’ll see them in motion and speaking lines, and go Oh. That’s different. Never mind. And while people will make fanart of the show depictions of the characters and those will probalby get popular, they’ll also keep doing fanart of their pre-show headcanons, and those too will be popular. (God knows when I draw or visualize book!Sandor, Rory does not come to mind, lol.) Either way, there’s no reason to panic. We’ll live.
(Though will we live well? Got to wait on the writing and showrunning for that, alas.)
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grumpy-zane · 4 years ago
Text
The group landed on the hard desert ground. “Did you set the dial thing right?” Jay groaned, hoisting himself up.
“You think I know how to use it?” Kai followed suit.
across from the group, the droid slowly stood up, shuttering with electricity. Her voice was warped, “What have you done..?”
“We stopped you! And.. we’re in our own time!” Jay jumped to his feet, “Stand down or face my lighting.”
“You.. Fools!” She snapped, teetering, “You didn’t send us forward, you sent us back!”
“back? how far?” Lloyd stood up and approached, the ninja surrounding her.
“You think that boy Cyrus knew how to reverse an element of time? He only made it unstable, unusable!” a bolt of lighting shot out and grounded itself. “We’re stuck here, we’re all stuck here! And it’s all your fault!”
Zane knealt down to meet her at eye-level, “Xalie, I understand your frustration, and we understand why you wanted to change the past, but you don’t need to change the past to make things better for you.”
She glared, “Easy for you to say, you’re in love with the best version.”
“Cyrus would have found a purpose for you.”
“Would he? I was supposed to be erased, he said I was too unstable, I was too emotional, I was not what he was looking for. I was stuck in storage as a ‘just in case’, but he never trusted me. PIXAL and I, and the 12 other prototypes, we share the same coding. We share the same logic, He tore her personality out of her because I am what she would be. I. Am. Her.”
“you’re not Pixal, no one else is,” Zanes voice was gentle, a stark contrast to her snarling, “but you’re right on one thing. When I met pixal, she had no personality, she didn’t function for herself, but to assist others... but I was wrong there too. She did have feelings, she had a lot of them about a lot of things, and it wasn’t until I got to know her that she showed me them.”
“Yeah, and you were head over heels for her, love at first sight.” Cole pointed, much to Zane’s embarrassment.
“Look, bottom line, you’re not Pixal, and she didn’t replace you, your job wasn’t to assist others.” Kai said.
“Then.. what is my purpose?”
Zane stared through her, the rest of the ninja exchanging glances, “I don’t know. But we can figure that out when we get back together.”
--
“So where exactly are we? Where’s Ninjago City?” They had walked across the desert westward, not a single sky-scraper in sight. At least there was a main road, but it was made of pressed sand instead of cement as it did in their time.
“Kai, don’t you remember when the time twins erased technology?” Jay held up his hands, “It looked almost like this.”
“Uh, yeah, was kind of stuck in a time stream.”
“Oooh, right..”
“hey guys, look over there,” Lloyd pointed over the dunes at a small settlement bordering scrub land. There appeared to be a train station behind that, evident by a large silver bell in a tower. “I think that’s the city.”
“History records state that Ninjago city around this time wasn’t a city, but a collection of settlements that merged together as they expanded. This must be the farthest east-ward portion. The largest area is by the coast.” Xalie informed. “it may be a good idea to ask around for the current master of time.”
“ugh, will we even be speaking the same language?” Jay groaned.
“It’s only been about 100 years,” Zane chirped, “I am very curious to hear the accents of this time.”
The people recognized them as ninja immediately, a swarm of kids running around them in awe. Kai found it hard to pull himself away from their questions, even going so far as to let a bunch climb up and topple him over. Cole had no issue holding four on each arm, their parents hovering close-by just in case.
They seemed weary of Zane and Xalie, however, who stood out like sore thumbs. “Are you from Metalonia?” one of the townsfolk asked them.
“No we are from-” Zane was elbowed in the side, “I mean, yes.”
“I can tell, why you both look so interesting in that armor. Isn’t it hot in there?”
“The plating is surprisingly breathable, thank you very much,” She redirected the conversation, “Do you know where we can find the Elemental Master of Time?” A bunch of kids proceeded to climb up on Cole in the background.
She thought about it, “No, I’ll go ask my husband, he works for the post.”
--
Now, it was the waiting game. the group stood around the edge of the platform, eyes running down the tracks that seemed to go on forever. the womans husband was able to give them the scheldue, but his appearance had raised more questions that answers.
Part of the on and off conversation while they waited was wondering if the postman was human, or if he was a time traveler. He looked no different now than he did in their normal time.
“Maybe he’s an Oni?” Nya suggested, “Masters of disguise.”
“I’m thinking that too, now that you mention it. But we have other powerful beings in ninjago. What if he’s an elemental master?”
“elemental master of eternal life? Sounds far fetched.” Cole leaned against a post.
Jay blinked, “What if, and hear me out, what if it’s a curse? How many mailmen have you seen in your life? I’ve only see him, like he’s the only postman in all of ninjago... or maybe.. all postmen look the same.”
“I highly doubt that too.”
“Yeah, sorry Jay, I’m going with my sister’s theory.”
A distant whistle cut their thoughts short, the quiet sound of chugging echoing as the train approached. It whistled twice, slowing down as it rolled into the station.The person that hopped off the side sent chills up the ninjas’ spines. He flashed them a smile and wandered around the side, opening up the low-hatches and pulling out the duffel bags along with a few others.
“That’s the crazy conductor guy-!” Jay hiss-whispered, poking his head uo from between Nya’s and Lloyd’s shoulder.
“I know, He seems fine now..” Lloyd murmured back, corralling the group back to give room for the guests stepping out. It was at this point his genuine smile seemed strained, eyes moving nervously as they continued to watch him work. Lloyd felt someone watching back, but it wasn’t the conductor. His green eyes scanned about inconspicuously.
“Heya folks!” Jay tried to leap out of the way in terror, but he stranger had an arm wrapped around his shoulder, “Easy there, I’m just as shocked to see you guys here as you are to me.”
Basket-hat, brown poncho, black hair, shifty eyes- “Plexiglass?”
The man let go and laugh, “Shoot, you do know me. Who sent you this time, the emperor? Some vigilantes? Mind introducing yourself or are you bound by ninja-honor?” He poked Jay’s suit. “Have some business with the train?”
Kai lit up, knowing perfectly well what he was capable of, “Yeah, actually I think you can help us.”
“that’s not what I was asking kid, but okay what do you need?” He fixed his hat. Favrile watched them from his position, fixing his blue and red suit train suit.
“We need you, and him, and most importantly, we need to find the elemental master of time.” Lloyd stepped in front of Jay.
Plexi looked iffy, shooting a glance at his friend, “Don’t know how to help you there, elemental masters aren’t really my thing. In fact it’s peculiar that you’d ask me that...” his hands hid under his poncho. “How about we discuss this inside?” He bobbed his chin at the train.
Favrile looked even more weary than before.
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modern-vellichor · 4 years ago
Text
Grief, is a Beautiful Thing
Stage One; Denial
Warnings: Grief!! Mentions of death, suicide. Loss of a major character. Battles with depression, silent tears, heart and gut wrenching sadness, indirect and very minor smut just to keep you on your toes.
Prologue || Series Masterlist
Denial; refusal to acknowledge an unacceptable truth or emotion or to admit it into consciousness, used as a defense mechanism.
You acted fine, you smiled and went along like nothing happened, like Steve would just walk around the corner and kiss your forehead, just like old times.
You took his place at the head of the table for a while, hell, you took over the whole compound. You were planning missions, doing research, organising accommodation and transport, planning classic Stark celebration parties.
Bucky saw through your act, of course he did. Sam did too, they were your best friends after all.
Your room was directly on top of Bucky's, down the hall from Sam's. When they walked by your door late at night, sometimes they would hear sniffling, little secret whimpers and whines. They never said anything.
You threw yourself into not only your work, but replacing your family. You treated Peter like a younger brother, and Morgan like she was your own. Bucky and Sam would watch as you played with Morgan, helping her with homework, checking on Pepper.
Eventually, the whimpers morphed into hushed whispers.
You spoke to the moon.
Bucky could remember Steve telling him that one morning. Every night you turned to the moon and whispered a little 'goodnight', and if you were angry, or sad, you would beg her to take your problems away.
"He's gonna come back, I know he is", Bucky had his ear pressed against your door. "He's a good man, he wouldn't just leave us like that, not me, especially not Bucky"
He smiled, it was sad and small and it didn't reach his eyes.
Nightly you would talk to her, the lady in the sky, glowing bright and bringing you peace. There she was, all the time, never leaving you. You started to go numb, your body shutting down, your brain struggling to cope. You fell. And Bucky was there to catch you.
Barnes was away on a mission, on that you had organised, you completely forgot. You were lost in a state of doubt and self pity you didn't even hear your door click open. You didn't register the light spilling into your room from the hallway, or the thud of thick combat boots being chucked onto the floor. You didn't flinch when the mattress dipped next to you, only did your eyelids flutter when a cool, metal arm was thrown over your waist.
"Hey, Buck", you sighed, eyes closed.
"What's wrong?"
What's Wrong. He asked that at least once a day. Once a day he asked a question who's answer was so blatantly obvious, but you never told the truth.
Never once did you utter, 'the love of my life left me for another woman, or, 'l lost my mentor and father figure because I wasn't smart enough, not even, 'my best friend sacrificed herself to save me and half the fucking planet'.
No, you always just smiled, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, his back, his arm -never his hand- and whispering, "Nothing, Buck, I'm fine"
He never argued either, just smiling back, pain and sad, but a smile nonetheless. He never pressed further, he never asked if you needed help, he was just there. He was a failsafe, he was always there, just in case you needed him. Right now, you did, but you were in Denial.
So he pulled you closer to himself, wrapping the duvet around the both of you. His breath fanned over the bare skin of your shoulder, his fingers traced absentminded circles on the soft flesh of your hip, his eyes fluttered closed and his heart rate slowed. You waited for a while, feeling him. Feeling his steady breath and his loose grip and his slow heartbeat, just like you used to with Steve.
He was so much like Steve, in so many ways, but at the same time he was do wildly different. You thought it was beautiful, poetic. How America's Golden Boy, the model citizen, the good guy, protagonist, could be best friends with James Barnes, an army vet who couldn't give two shits even if he tried. You thought it was funny, you idolised their friendship.
"I'm sorry he left you", you whispered, voice cracking as you let the veil slip.
Tears rolled steadily down the side of your face, over the bridge of your nose, pooling on your pillow. You wrapped your fingers around his wrist, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Bucky didn't hear you, didn't feel you, he was fast asleep, somewhere far away, with Steve, happy, you hope.
"I could have stopped him. I know "I could have stopped him. I know I could have, its okay, 'll get him back", you promised your sleeping friend.
With the denial and the numbness, and the constant work, came the forgetfulness.
You were in shock, it was normal. It was always small, forgetting your keys, or to eat breakfast, but it still made Bucky worry. You were coming apart at the seams, spilling guts and your shattered heart onto the floor by his feet, and he had to pick you up, and sew you back together. You just wouldn't let him.
Often, too often, he would catch you doing something you and Steve used to do together.
You would be reading a book, mind far away, and your spare hand would reach out for him. The look on your face was pain and regret and anger all in one, tears pricking your eyes as you recoiled your now balled up fist.
On the jet, you would reach out for reassurance, before and after a mission, and he would be gone.
You reached out for him, his wife frame squashed into the seat next to yours. You lifted your chin to admire him, in all his blood and mud caked glory, you smiled, eyes bright and glistening, cheeks blushing as he kissed the tip of your nose.
One of your hands reached down and interlaced fingers with his, your other wrapped itself around his arm. You leaned down, bead going slack against his shoulder. He let out a breathy laugh, a lovely laugh that ignited a fire in your belly. He ran a hand over your hair, brushing dried dirt and coppery blood from your cheek.
"You did so well, baby", he whispered. "You're incredible, you know that", his words were mumbled into your hair between kisses. You giggled, you learned from the best, and you made sure he knew it.
Your hand was tucked into your chest, the image of Steve in the seat next to yours all too fresh in your mind. The jet landed with a soft thud, and you ran through the compound to your room, not even bothering to grab your bag on the way in.
Bucky spent hours trying to coax you out of your room, listening to the soft sniffles and quiet sobs.
"Y/N, doll", he begged, pleaded, "please, let me in"
He was delighted to hear the soft bad of bare feet and the clicking of your lock. He shoved his way into your room, assertive and gentle, wrapping you in a hug and kicking the door shut behind him.
It was moments like these that brought tears to your eyes. It was the domesticity of it all, the soft touched, the way he drew circles on your lower back, ran a hand through your hair. It was the way he held you until you slept, whispering sweet reassurance into your hair, soft kisses to your forehead as you wept.
The next morning you called him into your office, Sam making a joke as he walked away.
"I have a mission for you, Barnes"
"Yes, ma'am", he responded, jokingly.
"Surveillance in Budapest, drug lord, Lloyd Montgomery", you stated. You never were good at briefings, not like Steve. "two weeks stay, you're leaving tomorrow morning."
He chuckled at your expression, brows furrowed, lips pulled into a frown. "Who am I bringing? Sam?"
"No, me"
The motel room was damp and dingy, mould grew in the corners of the ceiling, the mattresses were lumpy, the curtains damp.
You rolled over uncomfortably, chasing the sweet relief of sleep that wouldn't come. Day three had trickled by ever so slowly, you should've sent Sam on this one.
You rolled over, maybe Bucky was awake. You were met by a pair of startlingly blue eyes and a mischievous grin.
"Hello, doll", he smiled.
"morning, sergeant"
"What do you want?"
You stopped, thinking for a moment. You sat up against the headboard, Bucky switching on a light and mimicking your actions.
"A story", you finally whispered, smiling. You loved Bucky's stories, tales from before the war. Adventures, memories, stories of hard liquor and pretty girls and sometimes both.
"about what, doll?"
"A girl", you loved Bucky, he was always so soft when it came to his women. He described them like the finest piece of artwork he had ever seen, like they were an otherworldly being not worthy of his touch, like he was blessed just to be acknowledged by them.
"Her name was Rosalind"
You smiled, "Pretty name, who was she?"
"My first real crush. She was a waitress at the cafe my Ma took us to on a Sunday. I used to sneak in there after school just to catch a glimpse of her", he smiled, reminiscing.
You and Bucky both loved how vivid his memory could be sometimes, even after the brainwashing. He could describe some of his core memories like they were yesterday, others were a little fuzzy.
"She was gorgeous, most beautiful broad in Brooklyn. She had this red hair, real curly, stopped just below her shoulders. Real pale skin, too, freckles everywhere, and I mean everywhere"
You laughed at the little comment, waiting for him to continue.
"She wore these real thick glasses, right on the tip of her nose, she had the thickest Brooklyn accent I've ever heard, too. And these gorgeous brown eyes, they looked like they were just holes, like never ending or something, portals, I dont know", you laughed again, this time he joined you.
"Anyway, one day she caught me staring, wrote her address on my napkin. I showed up at her door that evening, told Ma I was staying with Steve. She had this birthmark, on her back. It started at the apex of her thigh and ended just above her hip, she called me Buckaroo when she said goodnight. Gave me a kiss, right on the tip of my nose and said, "See you tomorrow, Buckaroo""
You smiled, a pang of jealousy settling in your stomach, but you brushed it off. "She sounds real pretty, Buck"
"Oh she was, nice too, polite and friendly, real smart, kinda like you", you blushed at the compliment.
Bucky said a quick goodnight, turning off the light and falling asleep, you following after.
The lights were low. Music hummed softly, a hand wrapped in yours. Your eyes trailed up the arm, to find Bucky at the end of it, smiling down at you. He placed a quick kiss on your lips, "c'mon, pup"
He pulled you through the crowd, away from the party, a dress danced around your heel clad ankles as you jogged to keep up with him. He pulled you into an elevator, sporting that signature mischievous grin of his.
Next thing you know you were tangled under the sheets, Bucky on top of you placing soft kisses down your neck, sucking softly on your pulse spot.
"You're so beautiful, doll", he hummed, "so, so beautiful, all for me"
A thin layer of sweat was forming on your skin, Bucky still covering you with sweet kisses as one hand tangled in your hair, the other working it's way between your legs.
Your name fell off his lips like a mantra, a litany, a prayer for redemption, "Y/N, Y/N", over and over again like it was addictive.
"Y/N", Bucky shook you awake, you had broken out in a cold sweat. He wrapped his arms around your shaking frame, "Its okay, doll, it was just a dream. You're alright, I'm right here, doll, right here".
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umbry-fic · 3 years ago
Text
To Wish Upon a Lantern
Summary: In the midst of their journey, Lloyd and Colette visit a new town and decide to participate in their lantern festival.
Fandom: Tales of Symphonia Characters: Lloyd Irving, Colette Brunel, Original Character Relationships: Colette Brunel/Lloyd Irving Rating: G Word Count: 3266 Mirror Link: AO3 Original Post Date: 22/06/2021
Notes: Fluff fic with a little bit of angst! Written for @frayed-symphony's birthday!
~~~
“Look at these, Lloyd! They’re so pretty!” Colette exclaimed next to Lloyd. She was pointing out the tiny charms on display in the pop-up cart in the middle of the bustling marketplace. “I wonder what they are,” Colette mused.
“They kinda look like a chef’s hat to me,” Lloyd replied, leaning down to get a closer look at the charms. “You know, the one Professor Raine wore sometimes when trying to cook, just without the folded ridges? It’s even pure white in colour.”
The design resembled a cuboid with an open bottom from which a tassel protruded out, the individual strands all ramrod straight without a kink or tangle in sight. The top of the cuboid transitioned seamlessly into a pyramid-like shape, the same string that made up the tassel extending upwards out of the top of the pyramid, tied into a complicated system of knots. Trying to follow the string down its path made Lloyd’s head hurt. At the end of it all, the string formed a loop, perfect for hanging the charm up on furniture. Threaded on the string above and below the “chef’s hat” were two gems, sunlight reflecting off their polished surfaces and making them sparkle.
“I see what you’re saying.” Colette picked up one of the charms by the loop of string, pursing her lips as her fingers rubbed at the knot. It was a rather satisfying feeling. “But I don’t think a chef’s hat would be important enough to a town for it to be everywhere.”
“True.”
By everywhere, Colette truly meant everywhere. Lloyd had seen multiple variants of this charm at other stalls, some with different colours, some with and without the gems on the strings, some with even more complicated knot designs, some with words printed on the side, some without strings altogether and instead using clasps and hooks, perhaps to better attach the charm to clothing and bags. But it wasn’t just products in the marketplace. He’d seen it in murals painted on the walls of this town, and even walked past some children making a larger version.
“The details are incredible…” Lloyd muttered, feeling the material of the charm. It looked to be folded out of paper at first sight, but the texture wasn’t remotely like it. He wanted to ask the stall owner how he’d folded something so intricate and yet so small.
"Ah, young man, looking to buy one of the lantern charms?"
Speak of the devil! Lloyd nearly jumped out of his skin, gaze snapping up to find that the jovial, bearded stall owner was now right in front of him. The last Lloyd saw of him, he’d been engaged in a fervent discussion with another patron, and that had been just moments ago. How had such a large figure manoeuvred in front of him without any noise at all?!
“No, no! Just window shopping at the moment!” Lloyd quickly clarified, acutely aware of how light the sack of Gald in his pocket was.
“Lanterns? These are lanterns?” Colette interjected, head cocked and hands clasped before her chest. “I’ve never seen lanterns like these before…” When she heard the word “lantern”, she thought of fragile glass and cold metal grips, a flame burning with the faint whiff of kerosene, chasing away the foreboding darkness of winding caverns.
“Ah, I thought you might not be locals. I’ve never seen you around before.”
“Yeah, we’re just passing through. Never been to this town in Sylvarant before, so we thought why not?” Lloyd replied.
“It’s always nice to see travellers now that the Desians are gone,” the shopkeeper said with a hearty chuckle, his smile hidden by bushy black bristles. “To answer your question, young lady, these are indeed lanterns. It has been this town’s proud tradition to make these lanterns and hold an annual festival involving them, where we send them to the Goddess above. Though we’ve only been able to do so again with the Chosen's success. We’re actually holding our second one tonight!”
“A festival?” Colette squealed, clapping her hands together. If she weren’t in the middle of town and surrounded by dozens of other people who could clearly see her, Lloyd thought to himself with a smile, she certainly would have started jumping up and down on the balls of her feet like an excited child.
For that was precisely who she was allowed to be, now that she no longer had to labour under the title of Chosen. The child that had been buried for so long in favour of performing her duty could now come to the forefront. She could show her excitement over experiencing all the strange and delightful customs of each town they came across, whether it be Sylvaranti or Tethe'allan. And it was always so endearing to witness, the clear delight on her face, and it gave Lloyd even more motivation to continue this journey across the reunited world. Both to collect the Exspheres, and to let Colette experience everything this beautiful world had to offer, now that it was no longer denied from her.
“Yes. Everyone is encouraged to participate! All you need to do is purchase one of the lanterns, light it up, and release it into the sky! You can even write custom messages on the sides. Most people choose to write wishes, such that the Goddess can grant them.”
“That sounds wonderful.” Colette’s eyes were shining just as brightly as the gems on the cart. Lloyd was sure that she had built a vivid picture of the festival in her mind, what with her bright imagination honed from years of daydreaming as she sat within the cold walls of the Church of Martel, wanting desperately to escape but only able to do so in her head.
A festival sounded like a wonderful experience to him as well. All festivals were, events that exuded a magical aura as all types of people, strangers, friends, lovers and family alike, came together in one place just to celebrate and have a fun time. He hadn’t gotten to participate in that many, but he’d love to go to more.
"Lloyd, do you want to go?" Colette asked, nudging him in the side.
That was all it took for Lloyd's smile to slip into a small frown. Colette's terrible habit was rearing its ugly head again.
It had taken him a while to pick up on it, to learn to parse through what was innate to Colette’s personality and what was Chosen behaviour. But once he did, it was rather hard to ignore. The accursed mention of “Lloyd, do you want to…” had started to grate on his nerves - she’d done it with regards to the summer festival at Mizuho, and the newly revamped Altamiran theme park, and likely a thousand other times throughout all the years he’d known her that he hadn’t noticed. Asking was all fine and dandy, but only if she expressed her own desires first.
She always did this. Disguised her desires in the form of questions posed to others, too afraid to just do things for herself. She still thought she needed justification to let loose and just enjoy herself, despite her own happiness being justification enough.
Time to flip her question on its head.
"Do you want to go? To release a lantern?" he countered, eyes narrowing as he held her in a stare.
"Uh - uh, I -" Colette stuttered, fumbling at the unexpected turn of conversation, unable to look away from those intense russet eyes. "Well, we're low on Gald! And you did say you wanted to make it back to Iselia by next week, so if we stay a night -"
"That's not what I asked," he interrupted, taking hold of her hand. He didn't like being this forceful with her, but it was required. She needed to learn to ask for herself, and giving excuses was not the way. "I asked if you wanted to."
There was silence as Colette bowed her head, her hair hiding her face. It was but moments later that she raised it again, uncertainty painted across her face. "I… Would like to go... With you… And release a lantern together," she whispered haltingly, like it hurt to get the words out, shy blue eyes meeting his again. For her, it likely did, battling against her instinct to swallow the words down and the fear that there would be retribution, whether from invisible priests or the world at large.
There would be no retribution, not if he had anything to say about it. He squeezed her hand, giving her an affirming nod.
That's it. I’m so proud of you.
A small smile graced her face.
"Then it's settled!" Lloyd declared with gusto, turning back to the stall owner, who’d been watching the whole exchange in silence. “Uh, except the cost. How much is it?” He expected he’d have to haggle; they really didn’t have much Gald left. But no matter how, by hook or by crook, he would make this happen.
The stall owner burst into roaring laughter, slamming a hand on the cart. “For you two, free of charge!”
“What, really?” Lloyd blurted out, hardly able to believe his ears. Surely this was a deal that was too good to be true?
“Yes, really! Take it as payment for putting such a large smile on my face. Go down to the fields at sundown. I’ll meet the two of you there with a lantern. In return, spread the news of our festival to your friends! And if you choose to return next year, you can pay the full price.”
“Thank you so much, mister!” Colette said. “We’ll be sure to tell all our friends! I’m sure they’ll love the idea so much that they’ll all turn up next year!”
“Ha! I like the sound of that!”
Confirming the details of the meetup, Lloyd thanked the stall owner profusely before walking away hand-in-hand with Colette.
“He was very nice,” Colette muttered.
“That he was. So we shouldn’t waste the opportunity.”
Colette mumbled her agreement, that small smile still on her face, soothing Lloyd’s worry that he might have pushed her too far.
There was still the issue of lunch, though. His stomach was growling, and Colette must have been hungry from all the walking they’d done in the morning. But this time, he’d cut her some slack. He couldn’t expect change to occur immediately - it would take time, possibly years.
“Want to go get lunch at that place we saw down the road that sells dumplings? We’ve never tried it before, and Sheena said it was good.”
Receiving Colette’s enthusiastic agreement, (and spotting the relieved slump of her shoulders,) they set off, their fingers tightly locked together. And after lunch, there would be enough time to explore this town to the fullest.
~~~
Colette stood back on the grassy hill, watching the stall owner (whose name she still hadn’t learned), kneeling on the ground and carefully lighting a match. Lloyd stood slightly closer, observing with a keen eye. He was most likely trying to figure out the craftsmanship of the lantern; he’d been obsessed since he’d first seen the charms. She was more interested in the knot, and would likely be spending an afternoon at Dirk’s playing with string trying to recreate it. She didn’t think that would end very well, and a lot of untangling from Dirk and Lloyd’s end would be required, but it would be fun!
Standing too close to the stall owner ran the risk of her accidentally starting a fire, and that would have horrific consequences on plains of short grass such as these, so she was going to keep a safe distance.
As agreed, she and Lloyd had met up with the stall owner at the rolling hills behind the town, though not before exploring every nook and cranny of the town, with its curving arches and winding, narrow streets, watching the children play games with toys she had never seen before and having the honour of joining in. The stall owner had been in the process of unfolding a compact square of an unknown material, unveiling a lantern that was half her height and fitting it with something that resembled a lamp without the glass covering. (How did that fit into a small square?) After which, he’d lent them brushes whose tips were drenched in dark red ink, asking them to write whatever they wanted on the side of the lantern.
Enraptured with the idea of granting wishes, she had written the first thing that had come to mind before she lost her courage to do so. Lloyd had smiled after seeing her wish, choosing not to write another and only adding his name under hers, causing her to giggle as she tried her best not to trip and dot him in ink.
The sun had still been peeking over the hill when they’d arrived here, but in the time it had taken to finish their preparations, it had sunk out of sight, leaving behind only a harsh pink that was quickly being chased away by sparkling stars.
“It’s done!” the stall owner called out, standing up while keeping a secure grip on the side of the lantern. The fire was contained inside the lantern, causing the sides to be lit up in gentle orange light and the tiny words to stick out in harsh red. She’d noticed that quite a lot of things in this town were red. Maybe it was an auspicious colour to them?
Colette ran over to join Lloyd, accepting the lantern from the stall owner so that she was holding one side and Lloyd was holding the other, standing across from her. She could feel the heat of the flame licking at her fingers, chasing away the chill of the night. The lantern was fighting to escape her hold, the surge of hot air doing its absolute best to propel it towards the heavens, where it belonged.
“You can let go at any time,” the stall owner clarified. “Once that’s done, you can sit here and watch your lantern for as long as you want! I’ll be joining my family and giving you two some alone time now.”
“Thank you, mister!” Colette called out after the diminishing silhouette of the stall owner, until he disappeared amongst the throng of others. It seemed like the entire town and then some had turned up for the festival, populating the plains with head upon head. Somehow, upon this one hill, they were the only two present, free to soak in each other’s company.
“On the count of 3?” Lloyd offered, drawing her attention back to him. The flickering flame of the lantern cast him in the same orange light, the tips of his hair catching most of it and rendering the strands an even lighter brown, the features of his face soft while his lower half was covered in twisting shadow. A truly magical sight.
“Okay.”
“1…”
“2…” she joined in.
“3!” they cheered together, throwing the lantern into the sky and angling their heads up to watch.
The lantern rose fast into the sky, wobbling a little in its journey but remaining steadfast. The weather was good today, with no hint of a raincloud and only a gentle breeze that would pose no problems. Theirs was one of the first lanterns, joining the dozen that had already made their way into the clear sky to play by the moon, darkness having fully fallen.
Feeling a tug on her sleeve, she found that Lloyd had settled himself on the grass and was gesturing for her to join him. She did just that, the two of them sitting in silence side-by-side for a few minutes as more and more people released their lanterns.
"Sorry if I was too hard on you in the morning," Lloyd whispered, finally breaking the silence as he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.
"No, it was necessary," she replied, taking his hand and squeezing. "You were just trying to help me. Besides, you've more than made up for it today. And I know I need to start thinking about myself more. It's just… Hard.”
It was difficult, to push past the echoes of the priests in her mind, telling her that as Chosen she had to conduct herself with the utmost grace and not indulge in cravings. That accepting gifts from others were already pushing the line, not to mention asking for things. It wasn’t proper.
“I'm -"
"Stop right there," Lloyd interjected, pressing a finger against her lips, a slightly exasperated smile on his face. “No apologising for what isn’t your fault, remember?”
“Ah, right! I’m - Okay, I’m just going to stop talking,” Colette muttered with flushed cheeks, clapping her hand over her mouth as she let her head fall onto his shoulder. She’d gotten better, but whenever she fell back into one habit, she tended to fall into all of them at once.
At least she could stop herself now. And she wanted to shed those behaviours, not only for herself, but to stop seeing the sad frown on Lloyd’s face. He continued to blame himself for not catching on sooner, for unknowingly encouraging those habits, when it wasn’t his fault.
Lloyd chuckled, leaning his head on hers. “It’s alright. I know it’s not going to be easy, but all you need to do is take baby steps. And I’ll be here to help you.”
“I know you will.”
“Let’s just enjoy the view now, shall we?”
“Mm.”
Above them, there were a thousand pinpricks of light as the lanterns rose into the sky. So many and so dense that they seemed to outnumber the stars themselves, though she knew that was impossible. Or perhaps the lanterns were golden stars, each holding a precious wish that its owner hoped could come true with all their heart, prayed would reach the Goddess. It almost reminded her of gazing up at the grand chandelier adorned with candles that hung in the sanctum of the Church, but instead of a sight that filled her heart with melancholy, the sight before her now was a breathtaking and uplifting one, even if she knew there was no Goddess in the sky.
For surely, if this many people came together with a common dedication, a miracle could still occur to grant these wondrous wishes.
She could barely see their lantern now - it was both lost among the crowd and too high up, the words she’d written on it too far away to make out. But they were still held in her heart.
I wish that I can continue exploring this incredible world together with you.
Mayhap it was a selfish wish. It would have been more appropriate for the Chosen to wish for the good of the world. But she wasn’t the Chosen anymore. Besides, she was sure other people had made such a wish. And… If the wishes contained within all these lanterns were to come true, would the world not be a better, happier place? Would there not be a brighter tomorrow awaiting all of them?
“I’d like to come back next year,” she said, trying her best to push out the desires in her heart, to stop battling against guilt that she knew she should not need to feel. “Maybe with all of our friends?”
“That sounds like a wonderful idea.”
Maybe my wish will be different next year.
She snuggled closer into Lloyd’s warmth, enjoying the feel of his arms around her, both a comforting blanket and an impregnable shield.
I don’t think it will.
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toothlessturtle21 · 4 years ago
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Beer Bottle Blues
I already lost count of how many oneshots I’ve posted, oops. Welp, here’s another one! CW: alcohol, Kai being tipsy, referenced character death. Enjoy!
-----
After his boyfriend blows himself up to save Ninjago, Kai finds himself at a bar every night to try and forget his loss, even if only temporarily. However, he'll have to confront his feelings sooner than he'd like to when a certain blonde ninja shows up to tug him away from the bar countertop.
Kai drank the last of his bottle, slamming the glass on the bar counter with a quiet grunt. The room was slightly hazy, the effects of downing two bottles of beer in a relatively short time period taking its toll on his mind. He traced the woodgrain with his eyes, ignoring the bustle of both snakes and humans alike as they moved around the dimly lit hole-in-the-wall. His mind seemed simultaneously both dead and alive at the same time, thinking of nothing and everything at once.
But as he looked at his empty bottle, the condensation slowly dripping down the cold brown glass, his thoughts sharpened to the reason why he was hanging out in a seedy bar anyway. Zane was dead.
He had watched his partner of over a year, best friend in the whole world, and love of his life blow up in front of his eyes. Well, not exactly, but he had felt the rumble pass through his body as he hid beneath the sewer lid, huddling with the rest of the team for cover.
Like a coward, he told himself. He should have been the one in his boyfriend's place, Zane didn't deserve to die the way he did, especially not when he had just met another android, one that understood how he felt and experienced the world. He had spoken at Zane's funeral out of duty, knowing his boyfriend would have wanted him to honor him out of everyone. He had held it together long enough to say some words about the lovely person his boyfriend had been, but Nya had cradled him that night as he broke down sobbing in her arms.
He hadn't spoken to the team in weeks, only keeping vague contact with his sister to let her know she wasn't dead. Nya thought he was out clearing his mind around Ninjago, not wasting his nights away getting drunk in a bar, only switching up the location to keep bartenders from getting suspicious. Eventually, he had landed at one that didn't seem to notice that he was the red ninja, or at least didn't care. It was nice, to not have expectations surround you as you tried to drown out your grief with cheap beer.
Speaking of beer, he flagged down the bartender, who passed him another opened bottle with barely a second glance. He took a quick swig, and glanced around once more. A Hypnobrai was on his right, sipping a whiskey while a Fangpyre laughed with him one more seat down. It almost reminded Kai of his and Jay's antics, but as far as he cared at the moment, Jay didn't even exist.
Even thinking about his former teammates was enough to cause bile to threaten to spill, his friends a painful reminder of his lost love. He hoped there was an afterlife for the Ninja of Ice after all, maybe even with his dad. Kai thought bitterly that his creator deserved to spend a peaceful life with Zane more than Kai did, as he knew how badly Zane had grieved after his father passed once more. His mind drifted back to long nights spent awake, holding his boyfriend in his arms as Zane cried, the heartache of losing his father for the final time too much to bear.
Oh, what Kai would give for even five more minutes of holding the android in his arms.
He blinked away the new mist in his eyes, and gulped down the rest of his drink. It stung his throat on the way down, a helpful distraction from the thoughts of his former boyfriend, and the haze helped keep them away as he drank into the night.
---
Much to his surprise, the bar was not as secretive as he had previously thought. The next night, when he returned, he only had the chance to down two bottles before a hand shook his shoulder. Kai turned his head in agitation, ready to tell some drunk Serpentine to screw off, but he was greeted by a familiar blonde face.
"Lloyd? What're you-"
"You're drunk."
The blunt statement surprised Kai's hazy brain, and he blinked before answering.
"So wha-? What d'you want?" He slurred, but only slightly (or so he thought). Lloyd just quirked his mouth in annoyance and pity, tugging gently on Kai's sleeve.
"C'mon, you shouldn't be in here."
"Why?" Kai bit, trying to drain the last from his bottle, which was snatched away by the Green Ninja in a hurry.
"Stop that."
"Go away," Kai grumbled, turning away sulkily, and Lloyd narrowed his eyes.
"Kai, you're being childish. Just come with me, please."
"Why should I?" He didn't spare Lloyd a glance, and the blonde didn't respond for a few moments, the roar of the crowd around them filling both of their ears.
"I miss you," He admitted, the same hand that shook his shoulder earlier merely coming to rest on it. "It's been pretty lonely without any of you. I haven't been able to track down Cole, and Jay or his manager hasn't returned any of my calls."
"Jay... has a what now?" Kai eyeballed Lloyd's expression for any jokes, and came up short.
"I'll explain, you just gotta trust me. Please, man."
"Fine, fine," Kai slapped down a twenty, enough for both beer bottles (he had memorized the prices by now), and followed Lloyd out with a sunken expression. Outside, the night was cool, and the freezing wind was both sobering and terrifying.
"That was... quite the place you were in," Lloyd began, leading Kai down the streets, presumable to return to a less seedy part of town. "What made you end up with a bunch of Serpentine?"
"All the other bars just hounded me. That one doesn't give a shit that I was the Fire Ninja."
"You still are, y'know," The Green Ninja said quietly, almost as if holding himself back.
"Huh?"
"You're still a ninja. Just because we're down one doesn't mean we can't still be a team-"
"It's not a team without him," Kai interrupted, surprised at how quickly emotions leapt out, clogging his throat. "Never will be."
Lloyd was quiet after that, simply walking beside Kai, deep in thought. The brunette sighed heavily, turning towards Lloyd when his voice was no longer threatening him with a puberty-worthy crack.
"I know you don't know what it feels like, kid, but I can't go back after all that."
"I miss him too, Kai. He was one of my best friends. I can't imagine what it's like for you," Lloyd tried not to let his pity show too much on his face, but he obviously failed, as Kai rolled his eyes playfully and pulled the blonde in for a side hug.
"Alright Green Bean, I'll bite. Where're we going?"
"Home," Lloyd grinned, and Kai knew he couldn't turn back now. "Uh, I have some leftover takeout, if you want it."
"You pulled me out of a bar just to shovel greasy shit in my mouth? Real healthy there, Lloyd," Kai teased, and Lloyd laughed, and it almost made Kai happy for a split second before his heart sank once more.
"Wait."
Kai stopped in his tracks, and Lloyd turned around from a few paces ahead.
"I- I can't go back. That means seeing his old room. Nobody's touched it since, right?"
"I know I haven't," Lloyd gnawed on his lip, guilt chewing at the corners of his mind. "Same with Nya. We just can't stand even knowing it's there."
"I just can't," Kai shook his head, not moving from his spot on the pavement. "I'm not ready."
"It's been a month," Lloyd stated blankly, not intended as a jab. The words hung in the air, and Kai blinked slowly.
"Already?"
"Yeah."
More silence. Each ninja stared at the other, Lloyd waiting for a continuation, and Kai not sure how to move forward.
"I think alcohol is gross," Kai stated, and the Green Ninja looked surprised, but let his friend continue. "But it helped me not think during the night, which was when I was at my worst before. I didn't like thinking."
Lloyd hummed in sympathy, taking a step towards the Fire Ninja.
"Nya still thinks I'm off in the mountains somewhere," Kai chuckled humorlessly, his eyes meeting Lloyd's as a chilly wind tousled their hair. Kai both relished in and despised the cold that it brought with it. "Also, bars are warm. It's not exactly the beach out here. Being cold just doesn't sit right anymore."
Lloyd stepped forward again, wrapping his arms around Kai for a fragile hug. Kai returned it hesitantly, relieved when the heat of the Green Ninja's body was so different to the cold one he was so used to being close to.
"I miss him, Lloyd," Kai buried his head into tufts of blonde hair, reveling in the physical contact that he didn't realize he needed. "I just want him back."
Before Kai knew it, he was crying. Lloyd was holding him close under the street light they happened to be standing under, rubbing gentle circles into Kai's back as he poured his heart out into Lloyd's shoulder. It hurt the Green Ninja to see his friend in such a state, even with the knowledge of why he was such a mess.
As the crying waned and Kai's tears slowly turned to puffy eyes, he brought his head up and wiped at his face, red sleeve scratching at the sensitive skin.
"So," He choked out a small laugh, looking back towards the direction that Lloyd was leading him in earlier. "You said somethin' about Jay having a manager?"
When Kai had first read the note that Zane could be alive, he didn't know how to feel. On one hand, he was elated at the possibility that his lover could be out there somewhere, but on the other, the higher he let his hopes climb, the harder they would fall if it wasn't true.
Any doubts he had in his mind were thoroughly demolished once he saw his boyfriend standing next to Cole in the hot island sun. Zane scanned the surroundings, his now glowing blue eyes drinking in the people around him before they settled on Kai, the two holding eye contact for a moment before Kai broke into a sprint, flinging himself at his boyfriend, who caught him and held him fast.
Kai couldn't help it, he wrapped his arms around Zane's waist and buried his face into his chest, all of his pent up nerves and stress from the last while manifesting in happy sobs into Zane's prison clothes, his ever-gentle boyfriend pressing kisses to his forehead to guide him through it.
"Don't ever do that again, you fucking idiot," Kai mumbled into his shirt, and Zane laughed, the vibrations rumbling through Kai's body.
"I missed you too, Kai."
Although the two were broken apart shortly after to find their way off the island, they stayed close, Kai promising both himself and his partner that he would pamper the hell out of Zane for a week straight once they reached home, and the Ice Ninja smiled warmly at his boyfriend all the while.
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nekojitachan · 4 years ago
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I just read armies for the third time and every time I reread is just as fuckin amazing as the last time... Also I saw an ask once mentioning a collection about Aaron visiting Andrew in London, just wondering if you have any plans of posting again? I'm just so weak for my minyard boys. Hope you're good! Love your writing please never leave us ❤️
Ah... I went looking for the link to the story but I’ve been unable to find it yet (I know I would have used something to tag it, but that’s not working). I do have it saved, but not the link (on a side note, I found a twinyard prompt that I’ve forgotten about). So here it is again (until I either add it to Armies properly or do an Armies side stories post on AO3):
*******
Abram smiled at Ashley as he leaned gingerly against the top of one of her monitors with his chin resting on top of his folded arms. “So, I sent you the file last night, and let me tell you, it was rather difficult reining in Andrew while I corrected the few grammar mistakes – he wanted to make a couple comments on the paper.” That had surprised Abram, his husband’s interest on the topic, but Kimberly had picked an interesting book for once.
Ashley laughed as she leaned back in her chair and toyed with her long, dark brown braid. “I appreciate your efforts since I can only imagine what he’d have put in there.” She shuddered a little which made Abram smile in shared horror. “She’s doing better?”
“Yes, I imagine soon enough you’ll have to come up with something else when I ask for a favor.” Ashley smiled at that, a mixture of pride for her younger sister and delight in thinking up a new ‘price’ for Abram when he needed certain things done; he didn’t mind because Ashley was a minor miracle worker and usually asked for small, easily to do things in return such as proofing her sister’s uni papers or bringing back certain items from their travels.
“I’m sure I’m up to the challenge,” Ashley said as she tapped away on her keyboard. “As is, I’ve just sent you my part of our latest bargain. The email contains all the information you need in regards to the reservations I made for your dinners and a private appointment at Barts Pathology Museum.” She gave him a pleased smile as she once again toyed with her braid. “Anything else?”
“Don’t let the place descend into chaos while we’re away, yes?” Abram asked as he stood up and gave her a jaunty salute.
“I’ll do my best!” Ashley called out as he walked away, voice bright with laughter. Maddy and Rita (who was back in the office while she did some research before her next mission) wished him a nice ‘holiday’ as he left the office to meet up with his husband.
Andrew was standing out in the hallway with Lloyd and Kathryn Ambrose, one of the higher-ups who handled the EMEA region. Despite Lloyd’s occasional grumbling about the woman (he tended to grumble about anyone ranked above him), Abram never had a problem with Kathryn, who always treated him and Andrew with polite respect. “Hello, Abram,” she greeted him.
“Hello, Kathryn. Everything all right?”
“Yes, I was just talking to Lloyd and Andrew about how there’s a potential situation in Hungary. I know you’re about to go on holiday, but I just wanted to give you a head’s up that we may need to send the two of you there once you’re back.”
Lloyd nodded as he motioned to Andrew and then Abram. “Bit of a special request, but some people feel that you two could help out the agents already there.”
It wasn’t as if they could say ‘no’ when it was their jobs; Abram shared a look with Andrew who gave a slight nod after a moment. In a way, it might be better for them since someone else would be taking the lead on the mission and they would be providing support, would be more in the background. Though it meant that they’d have to do a bit of research before they left even though they were supposed to be on break.
“Send us all of the necessary information,” Abram said as he went to stand next to his husband.
“Though we’ll need an extra day or two to prepare,” Andrew argued as he stared down Lloyd.
“Of course. I’ll have Maddy put together the intel and send it to you by tomorrow.” Lloyd knew better than to fight with Andrew by then, especially with Kathryn right there (and when she appeared pleased by their agreement). That dealt with, they said their ‘goodbyes’ and left.
It wasn’t as if Andrew’s brother and sister-in-law would want to see them the entire time they were in London – they were visiting for a medical conference, after all, so they should have plenty of time to go over the material. If anything, the extra day or two they’d won from Lloyd would be spent by themselves to ‘recover’ from the visit.
Abram had the suspicion that they would need the days to recover, considering how Andrew was already on edge from the approaching visit, which was why he’d done everything he could to ensure that Aaron and Katelyn had an enjoyable (and busy) time once they arrived. He’d enlisted Ashley’s help on the matter, since he didn’t want the family too involved with Andrew’s brother ‘just in case’.
The Minyards were due to arrive the next day, and were staying at some hotel in central London where the conference was being held (along with a couple of ‘minders’ from the family), but had agreed to meet up with Andrew and Abram during their free time. Nicky and Erik would come to visit in a couple days for a mini-reunion, so there were dinners arranged and Abram had planned for an excursion or two for the couple to enjoy (by themselves).
Things between the brothers had improved since the wedding in South Carolina last year, had been tense phone calls at first before the two had moved on (somewhat) from the past, but Aaron and Andrew spending time together like this was a big step that Abram wasn’t certain that they were ready for just yet. Still, it was what it was, and in a few days Aaron would return to the States and soon after that Andrew would have an excuse to vent any disappointment by killing someone (more than likely).
“What idiocy are you contemplating now?” Andrew asked as he drove them home.
“Hmm, just that you’ll probably have to wait a week or so to commit therapeutic homicide, hon,” Abram confessed, and laughed when his husband heaved a weary sigh.
“Should have had the damn judge say ‘until insanity do you part’, could have gotten out of this marriage ages ago,” Andrew grumbled even as he held out his hand for Abram to entwine their fingers together.
“You like my mental instability,” Abram insisted as he smiled. “Keeps things interesting.”
Andrew did the sighing thing again but didn’t disagree.
Stuart and Davis were in the townhouse when they arrived, which drew a displeased frown from Andrew when he caught sight of Abram’s uncle standing in the kitchen with a purring King in his arms. Davis grinned while he held up his hands in a placating manner. “Just dropping off a few things and checking in on the kids.”
Abram patted his husband on the back before he went to hug his uncle, mindful of King who was handed over when they stepped apart. “You look tired, is everything all right?” Jamie had told him that Stuart was traveling a lot lately when they’d last talked; Abram had checked a few documents for the family to ensure that everything was on the up and up in the contracts.
“Too much drinking with Camillo last night,” Stuart complained. “Looking forward to being home for a bit.” He gave Abram an exhausted smile as he scratched King’s chin. “I know you’re busy the next few days, but if you’ve some time, call me and we’ll have some tea, yeah?”
Abram nodded in agreement. “That’s doable.” They should be able to meet up while Aaron and Katelyn were busy with the conference.
“Good. There’s some chocolates and jenever for you, and Ravi will show up with the cars when you need one, just call.” Stuart waved to Andrew as he left, and Davis bent over to give a meowing Sir a stroke along the back on the way out.
“Couldn’t he have brought some damn whisky?” Andrew complained as he headed straight to the boxes of chocolates out on the island while Abram shook his head and set King down on the floor.
“Your life’s so hard,” Abram remarked as he picked up the bottles of gin-like liquor and stored them away in the cabinet (he had a feeling he’d need them soon enough). “So, we eating in tonight or going out?”
“In, since we’ll be going out the next few nights,” Andrew said between bites of sweets.
That decided, Abram checked the fridge and cabinets before he settled on a spicy chicken and rice dish to make later, and worked on a few more documents for Jamie in-between calls with his cousin and Nicky while Andrew read a book. They went out to sit by the fish pond for a little while before he started on dinner, a mug of tea in his hands and a glass of whisky in Andrew’s, an enjoyable half an hour where Andrew made his usual threats over the poor fish and Abram slumped down enough to rest his head against his husband’s broad shoulder, content to sit there next to him and enjoy the peace and quiet.
Then he was given a shove to the knee and told to go cook something that wouldn’t poison the both of them.
Abram bit back a smile as he called his husband a prat for the umpteenth time, affection a warm tingle in his chest.
Andrew sat at the island and texted with Nicky while he made their dinner, and had a glass of wine waiting for him once it was done (and stole the damn naan once Abram sat down). It was nights like these which Abram treasured the most during all the years they’d been together, when they ‘bickered’ during dinner then curled up together in the living room (since it was late spring it wasn’t too warm yet for a fire) to watch a few episodes of a baking show they both enjoyed (easy to follow with their schedule) then head upstairs after a few hours.
They were tired, but not too tired. Looks were exchanged and clothes were shed before they sprawled out on opposite ends of the bed, where Abram spent a moment enjoying the sight of Andrew’s stocky yet muscular body (save for the slightest pouch of fat on his belly which he adored) before he gasped as his husband stroked his half-tumescent cock then leaned in to nuzzle it and-
He much enjoyed it when Andrew performed oral sex, but he also much enjoyed it when he could reduce Andrew to a shuddering mess with his mouth and hands, so it was the best of both worlds when they both blew each other. It didn’t take long until they both were shivering messes sprawled out on the bed, and then the bastard dragged him off to the shower to wash off before they tucked in beneath the blankets for a restful night’s sleep.
Mostly.
Andrew was up first, which was a rare occasion; Abram resisted the temptation to follow his husband out of the bed but decided to give him a bit of peace (half an hour) before he got up as well. He found Andrew working out and only put in a mile or two on the treadmill before he went to wash off then began work on a batch of chocolate chip and hazelnut hotcakes. It was right as he finished the last one that Andrew joined him, fresh from his own shower.
“I guess you won’t be fish bait just yet, babe,” the prat remarked as he rested his chin on Abram’s left shoulder and wrapped his right arm around Abram’s waist.
“If it wouldn’t be so traumatic to the cats and Nicky, I’d file for divorce,” Abram teased as he added the last hotcake to the huge stack next to the stove.
Andrew clicked his tongue before he snatched up the plate. “You’ve never had it so good and you know it.”
Yes, Abram did indeed ‘know it’, but there was no need to say it, was there? “Did you hit your head with a weight or what?” he asked instead, and rolled his eyes when Andrew made a rude gesture his way. “I’ve merely decided to wait for you to die from clogged arteries or diabetes instead, it’s much easier than dealing with solicitors and the such, hon.”
“What was that?” Andrew waited until he was seated at the island and his precious carbs set down to reach for his phone. “I’m making note of this so when we’re either divorced or you mysteriously disappear one day, there’s no problem with me taking custody of the cats and Bren – yet another cruel comment bordering on abuse.” He made a show of typing on his phone before he set it down then got up to fetch the whipped cream and syrup for his hotcakes. “How I suffer for this relationship.”
“Yeah, yeah, be sure to tell Nicky – oh, wait, I’ll do it for you.” Abram grinned when Andrew’s shoulders hunched upward at that remark. “I’m sure he’ll be ever so helpful with recommendations on how to save our marriage.”
Andrew gave him a long, level look for several seconds (which was impressive, considering the stack of hotcakes before him) before he spoke. “He’ll torment you just as much as me, you know.”
Ah, a flaw in an otherwise perfect plan. “Uhm… I’ll be off with Stuart?”
“You think the pest won’t rat you out to the family?”
Dammit, there was that – Stuart had actually calmed down on the whole ‘Andrew is bad’ front and all. “He’ll still be worse with you,” Abram argued as he set about making some scrambled eggs for himself.
“Right. Idiot.” Still, Andrew appeared smug as he finally cut into his stack of sugary carbs, so Abram felt pleased as he prepared his own breakfast. Once it was done, he sat down and rolled his eyes at how most of the hotcakes were already gone.
Andrew checked his phone while they ate and reported that Maddy had sent the intel for the Hungary mission, which they’d start parsing through later. Abram had just enough time to wash the dishes and go change before they left for the airport in the Aston Martin sedan which Navi had dropped off for them to use to pick up Aaron and Katelyn since neither of the sports cars in the garage would handle four people and luggage. Since Andrew didn’t trust anyone but the two of them or Bren (who made sure the cars didn’t sit idle too long) driving the sports cars, they didn’t want to have them out of the garage for the few days that Aaron and Katelyn were in town, so Ravi would drop off and pick up the sedans whenever Andrew needed one to drive his brother around town rather than let them sit in the driveway overnight.
Abram waited until they were past the worst of the traffic to speak up. “Aaron’s into general practice and Katelyn’s pediatrics?” He hadn’t paid much attention when Andrew spoke about his brother, other than to note that they were getting along (finally).
“Yes.” Andrew tapped his fingers against the steering wheel then sighed. “They both work at the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston. Guess it balances out us a bit, right?” He glanced aside at Abram with a slight quirk to the corner of his mouth. “We kill people, they heal them.”
“We don’t kill everyone,” Abram argued. “There’s some missions where people live.” He smiled when Andrew snorted in dissent. “Whatever.”
“Whatever indeed.” Andrew’s eyes narrowed at the hatchback driving much too slow in front of them. “I’m about to kill someone right now.”
Someone was probably going to get multiple vehicle violations in the mail within the next few days, Abram suspected, but for once the threat wasn’t directed toward himself so he merely settled a little lower in the comfortable leather seat and used his phone to check the traffic ahead.
They reached Heathrow shortly after Aaron texted to say that he and Katelyn had cleared Customs and retrieved their luggage, and so drove to Arrivals to pick them up. For some reason the two had declared that they didn’t have to go into the airport to greet them, so Andrew drove the sedan to the general arrival area where the two should be waiting and found them by spotting Aaron’s familiar visage.
The couple appeared surprised by the Aston Martin as it pulled up to the curb and when both Andrew and Abram exited the vehicle, with Katelyn breaking into a grin while Aaron shook his head. “It’s so good to see you!” the young woman exclaimed as she made an abortive motion as if to give Andrew a hug then thought better of it. “Thank you so much for coming to pick us up.”
“Ah, yeah, you didn’t have to do that,” Aaron said in a much more subdued manner; he was dressed in worn jeans and a MUSC long-sleeved t-shirt, while Katelyn wore leggings and a brightly colored PSU sweatshirt. “We could have taken a cab or something.”
“But the hotel room won’t be ready for a few hours,” Abram said while Andrew grabbed the luggage to put into the car’s boot. “I thought that’s why-“
“Ignore him,” Katelyn insisted as she nudged her husband in the side. “He’s grumpy because of the long flight.” She gave Abram a grateful smile while Aaron huffed and went to help his brother with the luggage. “We appreciate everything you’re doing for us.”
“Uhm, it’s nothing, really.” Abram motioned toward the car and fumbled for the door handle so he could open it for her. “Let’s get going.”
“Okay.”
Katelyn smiled as he closed the door once she was inside, yet Aaron gave Abram a displeased look over the hood of the car before he slid inside. Abram frowned over the reaction then shrugged as he returned to his seat up front.
“This your car?” Aaron asked once they drove away from the airport. “Seems a bit too normal for you, a bit proper and all.”
Abram bit into his bottom lip to hold back a chuckle as Andrew revved the 560 horse power engine to easily bypass the traffic as they merged onto the highway. “It’s not bad for a loaner, but I much prefer the Vantage S Roadster or the Maclaren 720S. They’re not meant for four people,” Andrew stated in a bored tone, “unless you want to ride on the roof.” He gave a look at his brother through the rear-view mirror. “That an option?”
His brother was quiet for several seconds before he made a disgusted noise. “Like rubbing it in that you’ve got money now, don’t you?”
“Aaron,” Katelyn protested in a quiet, unhappy voice.
“I wasn’t the one to bring it up,” Andrew pointed out as his hands tightened around the steering wheel.
That seemed to deflate Aaron’s bad attitude as he slumped back in the seat and was quiet for the rest of the drive to the townhouse. After about ten minutes, Abram spoke out in Chinese. “Perhaps we can be assigned to Hungary a little early.”
“Don’t tempt me,” Andrew replied, but there was the slightest bit of humor in his deep voice and his grip relaxed.
It looked as if Aaron wanted to say something when they reached the townhouse, but Katelyn managed to step on his foot before she walked away from the car. “It’s lovely,” she said in a bright manner as they entered the building.
“Ah, thank you.” Abram was a little unnerved by how cheerful she was about everything, despite being used to Nicky’s exuberant nature; why was she with a dour person like Aaron? “Would you like something to drink? Tea or coffee?”
“Tea?” Aaron muttered as he glanced around. “Can he be any more British?” That seemed to be directed at Andrew.
Katelyn’s smile appeared a little strained at the comment, and then Sir came trotting along, probably attracted to the sound of their voices. “Aw, would look at… him?” she asked as she glanced at Abram, who nodded. “Aw, such a pretty boy,” she cooed as she bent down to pet Sir, who began to purr at the attention. “And coffee, if it’s not too much trouble. We’re trying to stay awake until tonight, we heard it’s best for jet-lag.”
Abram made a quick escape to the kitchen and left it to Andrew to show his family around the first floor of the townhouse. He heard Katelyn’s excited voice as the coffee brewed, and the three returned as he poured the hot beverage in four mugs; it didn’t come as a surprise when Andrew headed straight for the cabinet which contained the whisky.
“The place really is lovely,” Katelyn exclaimed as she leaned against the island as she looked around at everything. “I especially like the backyard. We keep talking about getting a townhouse one day, but we’re so busy with work right now that an apartment is easier to maintain.”
“It won’t be anything like this,” Aaron muttered, but he gave Andrew a slight, grateful smile when whisky was added to his mug. “We’re saving up enough money that we’ll get something nice for Charleston.”
“Just another year or two!” Katelyn gave a slight laugh as she leaned against her husband with an arm wrapped around his waist. “And by that point, we should be able to enjoy the new home! You know what they say about residents and long hours.”
Aaron grimaced at that. “I didn’t think anything could make me feel as tired as Day’s obnoxious practices when we reached the semi-finals, but a twenty-hour shift will do it.”
Abram perked up a little at the mention of Exy, at least until his husband gave him a ‘gentle’ kick in the right ankle. “So lots of long days, huh?” he asked as he got up to fetch a tin of biscuits to go along with the coffee, which he made sure to set close to Andrew. “I’m sure you have stories to tell, yes?”
He might not know how to deal with ‘normal’ people like Aaron and Katelyn after being raised by criminals and murderers, but he knew how to get people talking, especially after going to work for Lloyd. Especially after seeing the flashes of envy in Aaron’s eyes (an emotion so unfamiliar in Andrew’s) since picking the couple up from the airport.
It didn’t take much prodding for the two (especially Aaron) to reminisce about stories during their years as interns and residents, about the patients they’d treated while on the long training shifts and their fellow students. For a while it appeared that Aaron tried to disturb them by recounting the most gruesome stories that he could, but gave up when neither Abram nor Andrew were bothered (that and it seemed as if Katelyn did some kicking of her own).
If only Aaron had a clue what his brother had been up to the last few years, but all he’d been told was that Abram’s family was in ‘shipping and trading’ and that the two of them currently worked for the government.
Abram noticed that Andrew avoided looking at Katelyn directly when she talked, his gaze often cast at the mug held behind his hands, and figured that his husband still had some issues in regards to Aaron’s relationship. He also noticed that Aaron focused his attention on his brother rather than look at him, especially once it was clear that Abram wasn’t the ‘squeamish’ sort.
Andrew wasn’t the only one with his issues, it seemed.
Katelyn was in the middle of talking about some child who’d eaten too much raw pizza dough when her phone chimed. “Oh,” she said when she read the message. “We can check in now.”
Andrew stood up while Abram gathered the mugs. “It won’t take long to get to the hotel,” Andrew said as he walked away (probably for a cigarette before the drive into the city), and Aaron excused himself for a moment, which left Abram and Katelyn alone in the kitchen. He went to put the mugs in the dishwasher and was surprised when Katelyn came over with the tin of biscuits.
“Uhm, we really appreciate all of this,” she said in a quiet voice. “I know you don’t have to drive us around or have dinner with us and stuff, that it probably would have been enough for Andrew and Aaron to just meet up for coffee or something.” She gave Abram a wry smile when he held up one of the mugs. “He might not show it, but it means a lot to Aaron that Andrew’s willing to spend so much time with him after everything, and he’s… he’s trying, honest.”
Abram was beginning to see why Aaron had fought his brother so much (according to Nicky) for this woman, with her cheerful disposition, intelligence and obvious love for the man. “Well, he is a Minyard,” Abram said once the dishes were put away. “I know what to expect.”
She giggled a little and nodded. “Yes, and while they’re wonderful men, they’re stubborn as well. Very stubborn.”
“Ah….” Abram made a show of holding up his hands and shaking his head in a clear sign of not wanting to incriminate himself (at least, not when there was a chance of Andrew walking in at any moment).
Katelyn giggled some more and gave him a sympathetic look. “Right, not trying to get you in trouble, but I understand. I can’t always say that we’ve gotten along,” she rolled her eyes in an exaggerated manner at that, “but I’m happy that Andrew found someone.”
“Thank you.” Figuring it was best to change the subject before his husband returned, Abram motioned to the young woman’s purse. “So, there’s a couple of dinners we arranged and a friend of ours lined up a tour we think you and Aaron might enjoy, but do you want or need to do any shopping while you’re in town? Anything to take back home?” There’d been times when some friends of Nicky’s had come for a visit and needed souvenirs and the such. “I’ve a good friend who works at Harrods who can be of assistance.”
“Oh, that would be wonderful!” Katelyn beamed at the offer and went on about a shopping list she’d been given by her coworkers and her mother, as well as a couple items she’d hoped to find before she left; both Andrew and Aaron rolled their eyes as she talked while Abram sent a text to Liliya to arrange an afternoon when the two could meet up – maybe even have Nicky join in since he’d probably enjoy the excursion and got along well with Liliya.
Tension seemed to leave Andrew’s shoulders once the couple was dropped off at their hotel, and it was a quiet ride back to the townhouse. Abram made them some spiked tea and tugged Andrew out to sit by the pond, content to be alone with his husband once again. “That wasn’t too bad, was it? Katelyn seems nice.”
For once, he didn’t think the frown directed at the pond had anything to do with Andrew’s ‘dislike’ with the fish. “She’s still annoying as ever,” Andrew proclaimed before drinking his tea.
“Really?” Abram sighed as he leaned against Andrew. “How long are you going to hold this grudge? I mean, it’s just been… what, almost ten years? Something like that?” Couldn’t he just accept the poor woman already?
“Forgiven Ally for Calais yet?” Andrew asked as he stole Abram’s tea, the bastard.
“Never mind,” Abram sighed as he slumped down on the bench. “It’s going to be a few awkward dinners, how wonderful. At least I’m not driving.” He had a feeling that there would be at least a bottle or two of wine consumed at dinner.
“I put up with your insane family all the time, you can put up with Aaron and the cheerleader tramp for a few nights,” Andrew told him in that ‘agree with me or else’ tone that always made Abram want to grit his teeth.
“I don’t mind the cheerleader ‘tramp’, I just have to put up with some weird, twisted copy of you.” Abram scoffed as he thought about Aaron. “Does he really think he’s getting anywhere with those feeble scowls and insults? After I’ve lived with you this long?”
There was a slight twitch to Andrew’s full lips before he finished Abram’s tea. “It is rather amusing to see him try, isn’t it?”
“Prat,” Abram said as he rested his head on Andrew’s shoulder. “Why do I bother with you?”
“Someone has to remind you to feed the damn fish, babe.”
“More like make sure you don’t try to fry them up one day, hon.” Abram hummed in happiness as his husband tugged on a lock of his hair then closed his eyes so he could enjoy Andrew’s presence and the sound of falling water. It was quiet for at least a few minutes before Andrew tugged on his hair again, harder that time. “Ow, what?”
“Come on, it looks like it’s going to rain and I’m not about to have you get soaked then pass out on me during a mission again.”
“One time,” Abram moaned as he stood up. “One fucking time. Are you ever going to let that go, either?” he asked, even though he suspected he knew the answer already.
“No,” Andrew said in a succinct manner as he gave him a slight push toward the townhouse. “Idiot.”
Abram wondered if he could get Katelyn alone during her visit and commiserate over living with a Minyard (former Minyard, in his case, he supposed) for a good hour or two, perhaps see if she had any advice which may come in handy (other than ‘render him unconscious for a bit of peace and quiet’).
*******
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fanfalc-616 · 4 years ago
Note
(Master of Emotion) Can you write a day off for ninjas and Nya (add both Pixal and Skylor) after hard work and it can help the ninja get to know each other better,especially Kai ( maybe spa day)?
Sorry this took so long, I wrote much more than I expected.
((I’m gonna place this after s7, bc I haven’t seen the end of the whole Oni thing. So I can’t put Pixal here like requested, sorry about that))
(((Watch me spend thirty minutes doing research so I can put in a minor character that’s technically canon.)))
Kai rolls his eyes as Jay starts complaining again. “I really don’t wanna go to the spa, I’m so close to finishing this invention-“
Cole shoves him playfully. “We’re already here, Sparky. I’m not exactly fond of the idea either, but I’m sure it won’t be that bad.”
“Skylor should be meeting us here...” Nya mutters, looking at her phone, starting to type something- likely a text message.
The six of them stand outside the Ninjago City Spa, and Kai feels himself internally dreading seeing Skylor. He had flirted with her in the past, but they never really went official- how could they have? Kai had realized he was in love with someone else, and now they haven’t really found closure from their kinda-relationship.
“Is everything alright?” Zane prompts, speaking in a low tone to avoid drawing more attention to them.
Kai internally groans as he realizes his clothes turned purple. Great.
“Everything’s fine.” He bites out. His clothes have started to shift more towards magenta, which is only a slight relief- it’s still obvious he’s worked up over something.
“Skylor!” Lloyd greets. He waves as the crimson-haired girl walks up. “Glad you could make it.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. It’s been a while since I’ve seen you all!” Kai doesn’t miss how she’s looking at him when she speaks, and he internally complains about everything as he realizes his clothes are turning a darker shade of purple.
The others have started to notice the color change, and he can tell that Lloyd’s about to ask, so he speaks up first. “Let’s do this! Spa day!” He flashes a smile that probably would’ve been convincing if his actual emotions weren’t plastered all over him.
… sometimes Kai hates his powers. 
Without waiting for someone to call him out on his bullshit, he heads into the spa, walking up to the reception desk. 
The woman behind it stares, wide-eyed as she recognizes him. Which Kai probably should’ve been expecting, they all are pretty famous.
He flashes a charming grin. “Hi, I’ve got a reservation for…” He trails off, frowning. Glancing back at the others, who have now stepped inside, he gives a nervous laugh. “Who was the reservation under again?”
Zane walks up to the counter, and Kai internally curses, backing away. Of course it’s Zane. Of course it is.
He doesn’t have the mental energy to deal with his stupid emotions. Warily, he looks down at his outfit to make sure it’s not pink.
Oh, thank the First Spinjitzu Master. He knows that he’ll have to tell him eventually, but today is not that day.
“The reservation should be under Lloyd Garmadon.” The nindroid explains to the receptionist. 
Still clearly in shock, the woman- er, Cathy, as her name tag says- types something into the computer. 
“Uh, yes, you seven can sit down in the waiting room, you’ll be taken back shortly.” Cathy informs them.
“Thank you.” Zane smiles. 
So they all go back to the waiting room, and Kai makes sure to sit as far away from Skylor as possible.
And since he was so focused on being away from Skylor, he completely missed who he was actually sitting next to: Zane.
Look, it’s not that he’s avoiding him or anything, he’s just… uh… 
Yeah, okay, he’s avoiding him.
Quiet conversations start, the ninja all chatting with each other, and much to Kai’s chagrin, Zane tries to speak with him again.
“Are you sure everything is alright? You seem very tens-“
“I said I’m fine, okay?!” 
As soon as the words leave his mouth, he wishes he could take them back. He shouldn’t have snapped at Zane, he didn’t mean it!
He barely notices when his clothes start to turn shiny- but really, he should’ve paid more attention, because that’s the first sign of his embarrassment, and- 
And now he’s invisible. There’s surprise on everyone’s faces as he suddenly vanishes from sight, and he quietly groans.
Today’s spa day is off to a great start.
—————————
They all realize it as soon as they’re about to be led back into the actual spa.
Zane smiles. “It’s quite alright, I don’t mind. I can just wait out here-“
Nya shakes her head. “No! Zane, you need to come with us-“
“A spa day would not be as beneficial for me; I am not an organic life form. I can wait outside for your return.” 
What annoys Kai the most is how little Zane seems to be bothered by it. He just doesn’t seem to care that he can’t enjoy things like they can.
Kai narrows his eyes, cutting off Cole mid-sentence by stepping into Zane’s personal space and grabbing his arm.
“You can still feel things, right?”
Zane frowns. “Yes, but I don’t have skin or nails that would be affected the same way a human’s would-“
“Not what I’m asking.” Kai interjects. “You can feel things. Would the spa treatments feel nice?”
Zane seems uneasy. “I- I suppose, they most likely would be at least somewhat enjoyable to my sensors-“
“Good. You’re coming in with us.”
“But there is no purpose-“
“Yes there is! You’re always concerned about other people, take a damn break and let other people take care of you for once! You’re just as much a member of the team as the rest of us, and I shouldn’t have to tell you that!”
The room goes silent. Zane stares at him with wide eyes, and while Kai is aware that everyone else probably is too, he doesn’t care about them at the moment. 
Kai let’s go of Zane’s arm and takes a step back, closer to the actual entrance of the spa. “Well?” He demands.
The nindroid gives a small smile and nods.
Kai smiles back. 
And then he’s drawn back to reality by the woman taking them back to the spa. They all start chatting again, although a bit softer this time.
Jay tugs on his sleeve. “Hey, uh, Kai?” He speaks in a low tone. 
“What.” He really doesn’t want to listen to whatever rambles Jay has at the moment.
“You’re pink.”
Kai blinks and looks down at his outfit. Pink?! He’s fucking pink?!
Okay, okay, hopefully they’ll think it’s platonic, it can just be platonic, it’s fine-
He turns invisible again. 
God damn it.
—————————
Kai has to admit, maybe the spa thing wasn’t such a bad idea. 
The aloe vera face mask is pretty nice, and when it’s taken off, he thinks he looks pretty good. 
He also gets a sugar scrub, and then heads into the sauna. Luckily, it’s the seven of them- and just them, so there’s not any strangers.
“So Zane, how have you been doing?” Cole prompts.
Zane hesitates a moment, and then sighs. “They attempted to give me a deep tissue massage.” 
There’s a beat of silence. 
Then everyone starts laughing. 
“But you’re a nindroid! You don’t have muscles to be massaged!” Jay giggles.
“FSM, how long before they figured it out?” Lloyd snorts. 
Zane shifts some, and Kai glares at the others. How are they not realizing that it’s making him uncomfortable?!
“It took a few minutes.” The nindroid admits. “It was frustrating for the both of us.” His smile is strained, and it’s obvious that he’s covering up his emotions.
Obvious to Kai anyway.
Thankfully, the topic changes soon enough.
“Jay, what’s up with your nails?” Nya frowns.
The lightning master gives a nervous chuckle. “I liked the shade of blue.”
“They’re sparkly.” Cole adds with a mischievous grin.
Lloyd shakes his head with a smile. “I got mine done too.” He holds out his hands to show off the dark green with a swirly gold pattern. 
“Ooh, those are pretty.” Jay nods. “I thought about getting a lighter blue design on top.”
“To look like lightning? That would’ve been pretty cool. Why’d you decide against it?” Cole frowns.
So caught up in everything, Kai doesn’t notice Skylor coming over to sit next to him.
Shit.
“Kai, we need to talk.” Her voice is soft, clearly trying to avoid drawing attention to them.
“I’d rather not.” Kai chuckles nervously, the robe he’s wearing flickering over to a dark purple.
She shakes her head with a sad smile. “It’s Zane, isn’t it?”
Kai freezes, his eyes wide. Then he sighs, running a hand down his face. “That obvious, huh?”
Skylor laughs. “To everyone except for him.” She confirms.
A quiet groan escapes him. “I hate everything.”
She pauses a moment, and then sighs. “I wish you would’ve told me.”
“At that point, I was still figuring it out myself.” Kai admits sheepishly. 
“Even if our relationship was kind of complicated, I think we could still be friends.” Skylor smiles.
Kai smiles back. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
Much to his surprise, his outfit is now a light yellow. Happy. Huh.
While it started a little rocky, this spa day seems to have gone pretty well.
Kai looks back over to the others, and finds Zane watching him with a pained expression. But as soon as he turns around, the nindroid looks away and rejoins the others’ conversation.
Though he’s confused at that, Kai decides to join the chatter, and Skylor does too. 
By the time they leave the spa, Kai’s clothes are bright yellow. 
Today went well… 
But who knows what tomorrow will bring?
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lloydskywalkers · 4 years ago
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let me just start out by saying i love ever single one of your stories!!! i’m pretty new to the show and your works just add so much more feeling to everything and it’s sooo good!!! i don’t know if you ever do requests or not, so don’t bother with this if you’re busy!! but if you ever get a chance could you write smthg abt Jay and Kai? their friendship is so underrated but so good and i live for the moments in the show when Kai’s big brother instinct(tm) kicks in for him as well as Nya and Lloyd
aH thank you so much!! i’m so glad to hear that :D and this isn’t...exactly what you asked for, but Kai and Jay have this fun of dynamic that reminds me a lot of me and my brother, and i’ve been tossing around little bits of interaction between them for a while now, so i tried to make something coherent out of those :’D
Jay likes to think he’s pretty good at the whole compartmentalizing thing, for the most part. Mainly because he actually knows what it means, and it is not, for instance, locking your team up in a literal compartment while rushing off to fight the other compartment that is your resurrected homicidal father into submission.
“That was one time,” Lloyd will grumble, as if he’s only almost-died once. And then Jay will flinch, because that’s where his compartments come into play.
(Nadakhan gets one, Unagami gets another, the whole fun-times adoption reveal another, and everything else can get stuffed into the metaphorical attic since they won’t pay rent.)
Unfortunately, the attic is where the bad stuff lives.
Metaphorically.
If Jay had a nickel for every time he almost lost all of his friends, he’d have two nickels, plus another nickel for Cole falling into the fog, and another for Lloyd getting crushed by a roof, and another for Zane blowing up, and another for Nya in that awful dress with paling skin as her breathing stutters and the light in her eyes draining and —
And Jay is way, way too familiar with how it looks when his family dies, and all the nickels in the world won’t help that.
So while Jay likes to think he’s pretty good at compartmentalizing, he also thinks he’s got a valid excuse for the way he reacts when Lloyd goes down in the fight that afternoon. Sure, some vague part of his mind remembers that they’ve got a plan they’re running, and Lloyd should easily be able to handle a tiny little stumble — but Jay’s mind is stuck in glaring oranges and health bars, the unsteady gasping noise Lloyd had made before he went down, dissolving into digitized cubes just like everyone else, and Jay—
Jay can’t handle that, compartments or not, so he clears the space between them in a heartbeat just in time to take the bullet that comes hurtling Lloyd’s way.
It’d probably be a very noble and touching scene, if one) Jay didn’t make a hideous squeaking noise when it hit because bullets hurt, and two) the bullet would have missed Lloyd by a good two feet anyways.
Ah well, he thinks, as everything devolves into panicked yelling. It’s the thought that counts.
Except thoughts do not count when Kai is involved, apparently. Or any of the rest of the team, for that matter.
“What is wrong with you?” Kai hisses right in his face, eyes wild and sparking. “I was covering Lloyd, what were you doing?”
“Filling in for you, obviously,” Jay retorts. He has an excellent followup to that, real snappy and all, except that’s the moment Kai’s hand clamps down on the bullet wound in his arm to stop the bleeding, and Jay ends up stifling a shriek instead.
Great, he thinks, fighting back stinging tears of pain as he tries not to take Kai’s apparent wrath too personally. At least Cole looks worried, along the the rest of the team, who are dutifully concerned for his wellbeing like proper teammates should be.
“He’s going to need the hospital,” Zane informs them, his voice a lot steadier and calmer than his words make Jay feel. Zane’s eyebrows furrow as he studies his arm. “Stitches, probably.”
Jay swallows, trying not to curse. There’s a sharp scream as Nya finishes taking out another attacker just beyond them, and Jay figures that’s good enough.
“Okay,” Lloyd says, squeezing Jay’s wrist briefly. Either in comfort about the stitches or thanks for trying to cover him, Jay’s not sure. It’s a nice gesture, nonetheless. “Kai, Cole, can you get him there while we finish up? Sooner the better.”
Cole gives a sharp nod, and offers to take Jay from where Kai’s got him in a death grip. Kai shakes his head, and Jay’s stomach sinks. Sure enough, as soon as they’re clear of the scene, Kai starts going off.
“What did you mean, ‘filling in for me’,” he grinds through his teeth, clearly not about to let this go.
Jay bristles in response at his tone. “I meant,” he bites out, through a hot flare of pain in his arm. Kai’s always merciless with the bandages, even when he’s not in a mood. “That you weren’t there. So I covered.”
He should leave it at that, but Jay’s in a foul enough mood to finish with a condescending, “You’re welcome.”
Kai’s expression grows thunderous. “You didn’t need to. I was right there, you shouldn’t have — you weren’t needed, you should’ve held back.”
Jay feels his chest go tight. His head is clouding with anger, and the pain in his arm isn’t helping, but — ‘you weren’t needed’? Kai really didn’t skimp on the jerk juice this morning, did he.
“Oh, like you could’ve done so much better,” Jay glares. “Lloyd would’ve been toast by the time you got to him.”
“I could’ve made it!”
“Yeah right—”
“I would have, and I wouldn’t have gotten hit!” Kai snarls back. Something in Jay snaps. Or maybe it’s just the steadily increasing blood loss, but of all the nerve—
“Well you didn’t, ‘cause you weren’t there!” he snaps back. “You were too slow, which is real funny since your brain is too!”
It’s not his best comeback, he’ll admit, but Kai looks as if he’s about to light him on fire, if he weren’t stuck carrying Jay like the cover of some awful romance novel, blood getting all over his uniform as they both scream at each other. Maybe Jay will get lucky, and Kai will combust, and they’ll both go up in flames before they can remember that Cole is right there watching them.
“Cut it out, now!”
Oops, too late. For all the incensed authority in Cole’s voice, there’s still a traitorous falter that lets them both know they’ve screwed up. They fall silent, the atmosphere heavy with the lingering tension and new sense of guilt.
And the disgusting sound of Jay’s blood leaking through the makeshift bandage and hitting the ground, truly revolting, he hates blood.
“Just…no more. Please, shut up until we’re at the hospital.” Cole marches forward, snatches Jay from Kai’s arms, and proceeds to beat the fastest route to the hospital at a militant pace.
Jay still looks like some helpless romance cover heroine, dangling from Cole’s arms like he is. It occurs to him that he doesn’t even need to be carried — it’s his arm that’s hurt, he can still walk—
But any protests die rapidly at the look on Cole’s face. And at least this way, Jay thinks sullenly, he can fixedly ignore Kai.
Then again, Kai’s got a killer glare, and Jay’s always been garbage at ignoring people when his feelings are hurt.
* * * * * * * *
Despite the fuss everyone makes, Jay’s arm really isn’t that bad. They hook him up with some pretty sweet meds so he remembers zero of the actual arm-fixing, and he wakes up just in time to complain about being held in the hospital for ‘observation’ or whatever.
“It’s to make sure there’s no infection, or that you don’t rip your stitches out,” Nya tells him pointedly. Jay cringes under the look she gives him at that last part. Geez. You get kicked in the stitches one time after sneaking out early and suddenly no one’s got any faith in you. Typical.
“Why couldn’t we have just gone to medbay,” Jay grumbles. “Pixal gives way better stitches than this, anyways.”
“Gun wounds get hospitals,” Nya reminds him. “And it’s not fair to put that kind of pressure on Pix when we can avoid it.”
“It wasn’t that bad.”
Nya glares at him. “It most certainly was that bad.”
“Oh, so when you get your arm crushed by a car, it’s fine,” Jay glares back. “But when I get a tiny little bullet nick, it’s that bad.”
Nya rolls her eyes, ignoring him. “Just think of it this way,” she says. “Now you have a little more time before Lloyd starts weeping apologies all over you.”
“Aw, no,” Jay groans, leaning back in the hospital bed. “Tell me he’s not blaming himself, Nya.”
“I think we had a promise about not lying to each other, or something,” Nya says, sympathetically. She winces. “Pretty sure he made the connection, too.”
Jay frowns. “What connection?”
Nya shifts, her eyes darting from side to side. “The, uh, the whole…Prime Empire, thing.”
Jay stares at her for a beat, trying to reconcile his blatant shock with the roiling nausea at the mention in his stomach. Nya looking at him all kind and sympathetically isn’t helping, either, because she might have made it down to the final two, but she was never all alone, and the reminder that she’d have been fine if Jay hadn’t gotten her killed twice is—
Bad. Real bad, not good, zero out of ten stars. Maybe he can take a bullet for Nya, next, and that’ll — that’ll help things, maybe. Equivalent exchange? Restitution? Some kind of fancy word that means Jay swears he’s gonna make it up.
In the meantime, he smothers the rising sickness in his throat and sinks lower into the bed, sulking. “It’s too easy to recognize trauma in this team.”
“I hear you,” Nya sighs, wearily. She nudges his shoulder, rising from her seat near the bed. “Speaking of. Someone’s got something they want to say to you.”
It takes Jay a second, but his eyes widen as Nya heads for the door. “Wait, wait wait wait, don’t you dare—”
“Love you,” Nya says cheekily, before taking her merry leave of the room. There’s a brief scuffle from outside, and the sound of Kai yelping, before Nya shoves him through the door, slamming it shut behind him with a damning click.
For a second, Jay’s tempted to hit the ‘call nurse’ button as hard as he can, in some desperate attempt to escape. Then he gets a good look at Kai, who’s turned a pale, queasy color that frankly looks awful on him, which is saying a lot ‘cause there isn’t much that doesn’t look good on Kai, but the expression he has on now—
Aw, man, now Jay’s feeling guilty and it isn’t even his fault. Stupid moral conscience center, he curses himself.
“So, uh…” he begins, because far be it from him to let this kind of awkward silence stretch on any longer. “Nice, ah, weather we’re having?”
Kai doesn’t respond, staring fixedly at the floor, and Jay sizes up the ‘call nurse’ button again. Just for the both of their sakes, of course.
But then Kai takes a deep breath, blows it out, and rocks back on his heels, fiddling with his hands. “I, um. I’m sorry.”
Jay’s jaw drops open. Which is probably an overdramatic move, all things considered, but unless he’s suddenly lost the ability to understand words, Kai just apologized to him.
Kai apologized. To him.
It’s not that Kai apologizing is some great big deal — Kai might have his pride, but he’s also an intuitive and good-hearted person who knows when he’s messed up. But to him?
Jay knows how he and Kai work. Kai knows how he and Jay work, and he’s breaking the rules. Because Kai and Jay don’t apologize to each other. Unless it’s some awkward expression of sympathy, they’ve never needed to. They fight dirty, aim for each other’s kneecaps, swear eternal vengeance and hatred at each other before storming off, then an hour later Jay’s bounding into Kai’s room to show him dumb meme videos and neither of them even remember what they were fighting about.
Acknowledging said fight with something as gushy as apologizing is not only useless since they both forget what they’re apologizing for anyways, but also useless because it’ll take too much time, and counterproductive on top, because it’ll most likely end in another fight about who apologized better. So for Kai to walk in and say sorry—
“Oh no, who did you kill?” Jay says, paling.
Kai spears him with a look, but it’s so pathetically watered-down and miserable that Jay forgets to glare back.
“Sorry, sorry,” Jay mutters. “I just—”
“No, no, I’m the one who’s sorry,” Kai interrupts. He hesitates, then sighs. “But that’s fair. I — I was unfair. To you, back there. Like, really unfair, in a bad way, ‘cause you were shot and I know you meant well, but you—”
Kai gestures wildly with his hands, his stream of words cutting off. Jay is left to stare open-mouthed at him again. Babbling like this is Jay’s thing. Kai is breaking all the rules today, huh.
“I just…” Kai trails off, ducking his head. “I don’t like watching you guys get hurt. I don’t — I don’t like watching you get hurt. And I get scared, but it comes out angry, and then I make a mess of things so I’m — sorry. Really sorry, for biting your head off.”
He exhales, a little shaky, fingers balled up in tight fists as his head hangs low, refusing to meet Jay’s eyes. Something softens in Jay’s chest, like gooey melting butter or something else equally pathetic. But it’s rare that Kai vocalizes this stuff, despite the fact that Jay knows he cares, and it’s nice to hear it, so he figures he’s entitled to all the butter he wants.
Jay’s own gaze falters, and the something starts to twist. He bites his lip, tugging half-heartedly at the bandages around his arm.
“Well,” he pauses, thinking of the way his brain had shifted to autopilot when he’d watched Lloyd falter, the razor-sharp shard of terror that always splinters through him when any of their teammates come too close to the awful images of death left in his head. He swallows. “I guess I don’t really have any room to talk,” he murmurs. “Be pretty dumb if I blamed you for that.”
He’s preparing to sink back into his own well of self-pity and loathing, resigned to spending the next few hours until they check him out of the hospital replaying bad memories in his head, when Kai’s next to him all of the sudden, shoving him over on the hospital bed.
“Hey, hey, what’s the big idea—”
“Move, c’mon. You don’t need that much room, you’re a stick,” Kai grumbles, before grinning brightly in success as Jay makes him space. The contrast in expression is enough to startle Jay into silence, and Kai takes advantage. “I know that look. But you already got shot, so you gotta cheer up now.”
“So you’re forcing me into cheerfulness by stealing my hospital bed,” Jay scowls, but the sting is lost in the sudden surge of affection as Kai elbows his way on the bed with him, a steady warmth by his side.
“I’m gifting you my presence, you should be celebrating,” Kai huffs, as he pulls his phone out. “Now stop looking so sad and watch this video I got of a bunch’a geese chasing Zane at the park the other day.”
“You’re such a jerk,” Jay says, but he’s already snickering as he leans his head against Kai’s shoulder to get a better look.
He’s forgotten to tell Kai he forgives him, but like most things between them — Jay doesn’t really need to say it out loud.
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