#I’ve tried the super crazy ones before but lord they’re way too much. just crying and drinking milk the whole time. unenjoyanle experience.

[worldsewage]

My brother really likes those crazy hot sauces that aren’t recognizable to people… like “kill yourself death sauce” and “fucked your wife ghost pepper death drops” and I’m just a Texas Pete Tabasco Crystal’s man.

[cynthiaandsamus]

Custom Toonami Block Week 73 Rundown

Code Geass: Lelouch and co. are still stuck in China and Xingke’s flipping out because the Chinese assholes are gonna kill the Empress and go with someone less problematic for their political marriage to Britannia’s creepily overaged prince. However Lelouch pulls out a Knightmare that’s basically the Twink version of the Gawain and busts everyone up as well as pulling a Father Cornello on them and letting the people know they’re all elitst 1% assholes that don’t care about them, which I suspect all countries probably know about their leaders but it sucks to hear it in a recording so riots show up all over China and CC Geass Flashes Anya to take her out so Britannia has to back out because the Chinese Hierarchy are now the least popular people in the world. So Xingke gets to be with his Empress and joins the Black Knights but Dietard wants the Empress to marry someone on their side so they can basically do the asshole move Britannia just tried to do but for them. All the girls are like ‘hey no’ and Lelouch is like “Oh hey Tamaki buddy, let’s go talk and get me the fuck out of here” so before Lelouch actually has to give Tamaki more lines and elevate him beyond the Black Knight’s Yamacha Shirley calls and Lelouch just straight up asks Shirley about love in a weirdly forced series of circumstance. But Shirley’s like “Yeah don’t fuck with love, don’t you love anyone?” and Lelouch is like “Yeah I do, Nunally!” and I don’t think that’s at all what Shirley meant but it does mean Lelouch sees that fighting for something beyond politics is powerful and agrees to not marry off the twelve year old girl, so that’s good. Lelouch decides to return home while they hunt down the Geass cult which is in China for some reason despite that being one of the like two places on earth Britannia doesn’t control and the Geass Cult largely being a Britannian affair. Meanwhile Sayoko is basically a Lelouch Vtuber at this point with her insanely accurate Lupin III mask of Lelouch and kisses Shirley so Shirley’s a little bit more gay than she was before and is not sure how to feel about that. When she’s about to tell the real Lelouch he kisses like a girl, Anya and Gino show up because we’re retreading the whole ‘sleeping with the enemy at school’ thing from the first season except with way less interesting enemies. Also the preview for the next episode is Lelouch dramatically talking about enemies finding out he’s Zero overtop footage of Shirley and Milly absolutely naked in a batthouse scene so I think we know what kind of episode that’ll be.

Inuyasha: The Panther Demon filler concludes with everyone meeting at the site where the Panther Master is being revived behind a strong barrier, if only someone just got a barrier upgrade to their sword, oh wait. But yeah everyone manages to free the hostages so even though Kagome’s jewel shards revives the Panther Master he’s still a zombie without a sacrifice which is weird since Naraku managed to completely revive the Band of Seven with one jewel shard each from skeletons and the Panther Lord has three shards so idk the rules here but yeah he steals the souls of his own men to revive and is Wind Scar Proof because he just is. It’s pretty cool to see him shooting his claws and lightning and shit but he’s too big and slow for it to be much of an interesting fight. Sesshomaru’s about to go full demon which would be interesting since we haven’t seen his full demon form since he lost his arm but in a neat bit of character development, Tenseiga calms his rage and tells him to use it instead. You get the feeling Sesshomaru only goes full demon when he flies off the handle and forgets about speed and strategy so him opting to not repeat the mistake he made against Inuyasha is pretty cool. Anyway Tenseiga heals the souls of the Panther Demons and drains their energy from the lord so he’s back to Zombie Cat Man which Inuyasha can Wind Scar because that’s what happens to villains on this show, all Wind Scars all the time. The Panthers don’t wanna fight anymore since their boss just killed them and tell Inuyasha to tell Sesshomaru the feud is over and they’re going back to the West. Honestly this is basically the same backstory they gave Kirinmaru in Yashahime so it’s funny for them to say they’re going back to the same place Kirinmaru is from, wonder if it’ll ever come up in Yashahime since most filler seems canon there.

Yu Yu Hakusho: Yusuke and Kuwabara continue the assault on Tarukane’s compound and basically plow through the lower demons easy since they’ve been fighting minor deities up to this point. It’s always pretty cool in Shonen to just have a few rounds to show how much power creep the heroes have had where certain things just don’t bother them anymore. Toguro murders a Chimera which has an oddly similar backstory to Nina from FMA and he seems really bummed about it but he’s like “Hey we’re both monsters made by humans telling us to do shit, so sorry for killing you bro”. And Tarukane basically sees Toguro is the next boss and is like “Yup time to scam some people off of this” and he sets up a betting ring for how far Yusuke and Co will get into his compound. This is kinda neat because it puts Tarukane in the weird position of betting against his own guards and hoping Yusuke will make it all the way to Toguro and then lose after everyone else has seen how awesome Yusuke is and bets on him. And funnily enough Sakyo’s in on the betting and he’s watched anime before so he knows to bet on the plucky teenagers with weird powers. So yeah Yusuke and Kuwabara finish plowing through the demons while Hiei kinda stalks them and remembers getting his eye surgery and wanting to help his sister but it’s kind of against spirit world rules for demons to just go plow through humans even if they’re scumbag humans so now Yusuke and Kuwabara have to go fight the Triad of boss demons Toguro has under him before Hiei busts in and just murders everyone for kidnapping his bird-loving jewel-crying little flower of a sister.

Fate Zero: So Kiritsugu can break Kayneth’s Terminator 2 Gaara defenses with rib bullets that just say ‘no’ to using magic and fucks his arrogant ass up. Saber and Lancer do some combo shenanigans to stab Caster right in the book and disrupt all his hentai tentacle demons but the book heals so idk why he can’t just make more. Kirei fucks up Maiya and Iris but didn’t double tap Maiya and DID double tap iris but she’s got Saber’s bullshit healing scabbard on her which no one knows about so Saber’s like “uhhh why are you healing” and Iris can’t tell her so she’s basically “Uhh internet?” Lancer comes in to save Kayneth’s worthless ass and tells Kiritsugu to stop being a dick to Saber because she’s pretty dope. But as usual for an early Fate encounter, no one dies and nothing of terrible consequence happens despite it being teased a couple times. I’ve noticed a trend with Fate that it really doesn’t like killing characters early so you’re basically guaranteed to have the first 2-3 major battles have a zero net gain/loss. Rider in UBW was probably the subversion to that since it happened crazy fast and anticlimactic but even that wasn’t till like ten episodes in.

Konosuba: So we finally meet Wiz the big booby Lich and Kazuma learns a new skill, both fun things. Also the gang gets a house to stay in after escapades with an army of haunted dolls and the most ���I need to pee” in a horror setting since Corpse Party. But yeah, good progress this time honestly, the living in a stable gag was getting kind of old so Kazuma’s a bit stronger now and they have a home base so that’s pretty cool. Also Wiz is a Demon General or some shit but no one cares cause there ain’t no money in murdering busty zombie waifus.

Sailor Moon Crystal: So turns out Minako is Princess Serenity, except everyone who knows anything about Sailor Moon or indeed plot structure knows Sailor Moon is Princess Serenity, that’s like the Luke I Am Your Father of this series. But still turns out Minako has been guiding everyone with the power of video games but also thinks the power of friendship sucks and she’s gotta go do everything alone. This makes things super awkward because Mamoru’s pretty sure he was in love with the Princess but likes Usagi, now instead of running with this interesting thread of a reincarnation falling in love with someone new we’re gonna do the reveal that Usagi’s the princess and the whole ‘till death do us part’ part of marriage was just a metaphor and you’re stuck with one person no matter how many times you reincarnate. But yeah, Minako fights the bad guy on top of the tower but he has Naraku’s Barrier now and Minako doesn’t have the Red Tessaiga upgrade yet so she needs the power of friendship but this barrier is friendship-proof and this fight is basically a bunch of kids on the playground making up increasingly stupid powers that negate the other powers the other guy just made up. Anyway Tuxedo Mask shows up and is like “Holy shit Sailor Moon I love when you kiss me and kick ass, go get em sweetie I’ll hold your flower” and they kiss and Usagi has learned that if she just pretends she got this the power of her confidence will beat the bad guy. Unfortunately she does not got this and Tuxedo Mask has to pull a Piccolo and throw himself in front of the blast.

Durarara!!:  So now that we’ve had our climax for the arc we have a six month timeskip and everyone’s just kinda living life, Mika and Seiji are being clinically insane together, there’s cops harassing Celty to the point of mental breakdown (normal cop stuff) Shinra’s dad’s in town, Namie’s become Izaya’s secretary for blackmail shit, you know, normal stuff. Also there’s a katana-wielding maniac going around slashing people and Anri’s being bullied and sexually harassed to the point of mental collapse, normal stuff.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 149

149

Picking up dessert, Lance selecting by sniffing the air outside the bakery rather than coming in, something Keith wasn’t going to question, they headed back to the apartment. Krolia was there. As was a suspicious looking container on the beach. Putting her beer down, his mother rushed over to Lance. Keith mentally agreeing with his boyfriend as Lance drew closer to him. Krolia ignoring the action as she wrapped her arms around Lance. His mother was a crazy woman. Keith had half a mind to pull her off Lance

“Lance! Look at you! You’re positively glowing in an undead kind of way!”

“Mum!”

“Oh, hush you. I’m allowed to have missed him”

“You don’t need to tease him”

“I’m not. Look how round you’re getting! Hello, my grandbabies! How are you feeling? Any weird cravings? I had such weird cravings when I was pregnant with Keith. Have you felt them moving?”

Pulling Krolia off Lance, Keith moved between the pair. The dessert box nearly squashed as he did

“Mum, leave him alone. We only just got home”

“No need to be so jumpy. It’s not like you’ve got a head in the box. Sooo. What’s in the box?”

A what now? Why would he have a head in a box? Okay. The idea sounded somewhat familiar, but who went to a bakery to bring home a head?

“Dessert?”

Keith didn’t know why Krolia laughed, or why Shiro let out a bark of laughter before covering his mouth

“Oh, I brought dessert with me! I baked it myself as a little thank you to Lance for having me over for dinner. Here, come take a look”

Krolia took the dessert box from him, Keith looking to Lance as he whispered

“Whatever it is, I wouldn’t recommend eating it”

Krolia calling back over her shoulder

“I heard that! Talk about rude! I baked it according to the recipe”

“And where did you get the recipe?”

“Mostly online”

It was clear that “mostly online” actually meant “hardly on line and mostly from her head”. So proud of her creation that was more an abomination, Keith nearly cried as the cheesecake inside the box went into the bin untouched. Lance looked ready to weep for the poor dessert. Binning it was definitely far too extreme as Lance had chosen something that hadn’t made him feel nauseous and had thought of everyone in his selection. Goodbye lemon cheesecake with lemon curd. They’d hardly known you, but you were missed in the face of the lump in the container.

Maybe lump wasn’t quite fair, yet Lance was trying to figure it out still, so something had to be wrong with the round frosted dessert

“It’s an apple tea cake”

Oh lord. That didn’t sound like a dessert should. “Apple” sounded too healthy

“I steeped the apples in Earl Grey. I mean, why call it a “tea cake”, if there’s no hint of tea in it?”

That... kind of made sense. A quick glance at Lance’s face told him that it shouldn’t

“Uh. Right. I might check on dinner”

“No need. I noticed the lack of vegetables in the dish so I added some frozen ones from the freezer. I expected you boys to be eating healthier, and not just those cans of beans I found in the cupboard”

With each word, Lance looked closer and closer to crying. Ropa Vieja had just the right amount of “fuck all vegetables” to “lots of meat and sauce”. Sure, there were beans and fried things that were like bananas yet weren’t, but Keith could distinctly remember that there weren’t things like frozen vegetables in there. No mixed peas and corn. No carrot. No broccoli. No beans. Lance made them get the proper mixed frozen vegetable packs “as they insisted on being heathens in the kitchen”.

“Ah, Krolia. What vegetables did you add?”

Lance was brave to ask

“Just what was laying around. You boys need to eat healthy and keep those babies healthy. Did I do so something wrong?”

“No. No. I’m sure it’ll be okay. I’m just going to grab some blood before dinner”

His boyfriend didn’t think it’d be okay at all. Krolia clearly didn’t know how to cook. Shiro and Curtis too spineless to stop her. The pair of them on the sofa with Kosmo, watching this train wreck happen right in front of them

“Alright. You put your feet up and relax, though you haven’t answered any of my questions and I want to see all your photos. I promised Miriam I’d look out for you. I’m so sorry she’s passed. She was such an amazing woman. Very funny. I saw a lot of myself in her great sense of humour. I enjoyed her company very much”

Lance seemed a little dazed as he wandered off to their room, rather than the sofa. Keith trailing after him, expecting tears. Sitting on their bed, Lance was holding the latest images of their twins, blood bag sitting on the bed next to him

“Don’t let mum get to you”

Lance snorted, still staring at their twins

“I’m that obvious?”

“A little. She didn’t mess up too much, did she?”

“Nah. I mean, I would have waited if i was adding vegetables so there’d be some crunch instead of mush, but the meat flavour should still be there”

Lance had the whole dinner planned in his head. Keith knew it. He’d prepped early to have a chance to clear his mind and build up facing a full dinner table... not that they really had the space for everyone to sit at the dinner table as they would have at Lance’s

“You okay? She kind of bombarded you with questions”

“I noticed. I’m... kind of not sure what I’m feeling but I think I feel a little better seeing her. She seemed excited about all of this”

“She’s too excitable”

“Nah. I mean. Your mum spent decades fighting against vampires and werewolves. I know she says she accepts me... her excitement... I guess it makes me feel maybe that she does. And that makes me feel better”

“Babe, she’s slightly crazy. Don’t think I haven’t forgotten your first meeting”

“I haven’t. Do you get what I’m saying, though?”

That Lance felt he didn’t have to fear being killed the moment their twins were born, or killed before the birth to stop the spread of vampirism. He hadn’t thought of that. Other than Kolivan, Krolia was the highest Blade member that he’d met. Coran was biased, he helped far more than he harmed. So if Krolia wasn’t going after him, than that meant he could settle that lot of internal worry.

“I do now that I think about it. That reminds me, what was Luis on about? That was weird as hell”

Lance sighed deeply

“Mami’s ring was a family heirloom. She got my grandmothers wedding ring and her sister got the engagement ring when my grandmother passed. Instead of passing it on, as it should have been, I took it once she’d passed. Coran stayed by my side as we viewed Mami until the very last moment before the lid the was slid onto the coffin. I slipped her rings back on where they belong. Seeing you, he’d have to tell Nadia and Sylvio that I’m still around and dating a guy. I wish I could have seen his face when you told him to “shoo”. Thank you for not hitting him...”

“It was tempting... I didn’t want to upset you by starting a fight. And... he had lost Mami too”

“It’s easy to get caught up in what I’m going through, but us kids all adored her. Thank you for being there with me. It made it easier to remember the better times than simply focusing on her being in the cold ground”

“If mum is too much. I can talk to her”

Lance placed the photos down beside him, holding his arm out. Coming over, Keith sank to kneel in front of him, Lance hugging him as he rested his head against his boyfriend’s belly

“She’s fine. Honestly. It’s refreshing that she isn’t acting like I’m made of glass”

“As long as you’re okay. You’re okay, aren’t you?”

“I’m okay. Our twins are okay. I know you can’t feel them, but I was looking at the photos as I felt them move. They’ve been moving a little more”

Keith didn’t feel anything

“Are they moving now?”

“A bit”

“Maybe they don’t like me”

Patting his head, Keith’s chin dug in lightly as he looked up to Lance

“It’s fine, babe. They know you’re here and they love you. Google said it might take a bit before you feel them”

“What does it feel like?”

“Like nothing I can explain. It started like bubbles at first. I totally thought it was indigestion or gas. Pregnancy farts are no joke. Mami told me. She didn’t feel then move though”

Keith pouted. He wasn’t sure he’d handle the pregnant part, but he wanted to feel their babies move

“I want to feel them”

“You will. They already hear you. They hear every time you tell them you love them. I’m sure it won’t be long. I’ve been trying not to say anything but I definitely felt them moving. I don’t know I was being punched or kicked”

Lance’s tone held a lot of pout. Keith was pouting too. For all Lance was going through, he could feel their twins inside of him, as living human beings. Them moving felt as Lance was being rewards for working so hard. He wanted to be rewarded too. He’s contributed, even if he wasn’t doing the heavy lifting

“They’re picking on you already”

Lance sounded proud. Normally someone wouldn’t seem so proud of being hit, before his tone started to shift

“Yep. My two fighters showing off that they’ve inherited their daddy’s moved. I’m honestly okay, babe. Dinner might be... an event. The reason it’s called a “tea” cake is generally because you have it during afternoon tea. Not because there’s tea in it... I was looking forward to cheesecake”

“I was too. I don’t know what to make of her icing it”

“At least she tried?”

Keith didn’t know much, yet he was sure he was right about this. Lance’s fingers against his hair felt nice as he leaned into the touch

“She’s super trying. You don’t have to answer her questions if you don’t want to”

“No. I meant it when I said it was relieving having her be herself. Like a little taste of normality”

Keith snorted. Lance was deluded

“I don’t think that word factors into our lives”

“Maybe not. We should head back out”

“I don’t want to”

Lance ruffled his hair, not caring that he was being whiny. He wanted tonight to go the way Lance had planned so Lance could see he really was more capable than his depressed state was making him feel. Normality really didn’t exist in their lives. Going back to Garrison meant living with two werewolves and stolen cow. How was that normal? And how was it that he was actually looking forward to it. To seeing Lance putter around and mumble about the lawn. The lawn at the cemetery must be like total goals once you hit a certain age. It was rather impressive and Keith really couldn’t care less about lawn. Maybe he should have bought Lance a new lawnmower for Christmas? It probably wasn’t too late, but was it safe to let his pregnant boyfriend loose with a lawnmower? Maybe he’d make it this years Christmas present, for after the twins were born? Wait. Was he really thinking about the lawn...? What was wrong with him?

*

Krolia hadn’t stopped talking. Keith was fairly certain she’d only raised her voice when she’d gone to use the toilet instead of shutting up. She’d asked Lance all kinds of questions about his pregnancy and Cuba. Lance had shown her photos, Krolia taking photos of the photos with her phone. By the time Coran knocked at the door at 6:30pm, both Shiro and Curtis seemed as relieved as Keith was that there was finally someone else Krolia could focus on. Standing up mid-conversation, Lance went opened the door. Keith stifling his laugh. His boyfriend had the best manners of all of them, but clearly he too had had enough of Krolia.

“Allura?! What are you doing back?!”

“Lance!”

Keith blinked in shock. He didn’t think Allura would be back so soon. Lance hadn’t said he’d heard two sets of footsteps and Kosmo hadn’t barked. Hugging each other, the pair were acting like reunited siblings as they wrapped their arms around each other. Both of them trying to tell each other how good they looked, Keith suspecting Lance was teary eyed and happy about the surprise. Coran seemed especially pleased with his part in this surprise, eyeing the pair happily, moustache corner in his fingers as he beamed. Drawing away, Allura looked Lance up and down

“Oh, Lance. You’re positively glowing with pregnancy. May I?”

“Yeah. Thanks for asking. It still feels a little weird. I’m... so happy you’re back. Rome agreed with you. You’re more vibrant and stunningly beautiful than ever”

Allura drew Lance away from the doorway with a giggle, Keith may have kind of hated the lingering touch of her hand on Lance’s arm. And what was Allura asking permission for? She’d already hugged Lance. That was enough physical contact. And why was she giggling?

“Hush, you. It’s wonderful to see you. I’ve missed you very much, and being diplomatic is simply tedious! Oh...”

Allura grew distant, looking past Lance as she continued in a vacant tone. Keith cautious over her expression

“A boy and a girl... Oh, Lance. I’m so sorry, oh... I’m so sorry. but he’ll be okay. You’ll see. The agony will turn to happiness again”

Allura blinked half a dozen times, perhaps she was unaware of what she’d said. A boy and a girl? Did she just... tell them the sexes from a touch? A girl... and a boy... They were having a boy and a girl? Lance stood frozen, Coran’s smile had slipped. Sliding off the arm of the sofa, Keith strode over to Lance, taking Allura’s hand off his boyfriend. Lance had wanted to wait. To be surprised. Now Allura was telling them there was something wrong with their little boy? And what was this agony?

Pulling out her handkerchief, Allura dabbed at her nose

“Sorry. My mind went right away. Oh, it’s so wonderful to see you. I have so much to tell you. I’m so sorry Miriam passed. I adored her so much. She treated me like a daughter for all these years. I have such fond memories of her over a cup of tea and a biscuit in the middle of the night”

Allura seemed a bit old to be acting as if it’d been one of Mami’s secrets. She didn’t exactly say it was, but the tone was wistful. Genuine sadness over something that’d never happen again. Lance stammering slightly as he said

“Me... uh... yeah... me too.. uh. Come in. Dinner’ll be ready in a little bit, provided that the rice hasn’t started sticking. Keith, can you give me a hand? Shiro will get you and Coran a glass of wine. Krolia made a cake and dinner is Americanised Ropa Vieja. You have to tell all about what you’ve been up to”

His boyfriend was doing a good job of hiding his upset. Keith’s heart was racing as he tried not to snap at Allura. Lance hadn’t noticed her visions all that much in their time together, now it was the third time? that she’d experienced some kind of foresight in front of them. What was this agony? Lance wasn’t going to go through any kind of agony if Keith could help it. If the boy and the girl weren’t their twins, then who? Did they know them? We’re the kids going to be hurt? Was their son going to be hurt?

“Is no one going to ask what the hell was that? Or am I going to have to?”

Thank god for Krolia and bluntness. Keith didn’t have the words to be polite

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I do something?”

Coran cleared his throat, Allura seemed confused by Krolia’s outburst

“Allura, my dear, your foresight popped up again. Do you remember what you saw?”

“Flashes. I’m sorry. I saw Lance holding two beautiful children, and him giving birth, but it’s already fading away”

“You said someone about a boy and girl. And someone hurt. That’s pretty serious to be coming in and saying things about my grandchildren with no idea what you’ve said”

Whelp. Keith was glad not to be in Allura’s shoes. His mother sounded ready to shoot Allura or hold her prisoner and torture her until she revealed everything. Allura stared at her feet, downcast as she replied

“I’m sorry. Sometimes I remember what I see. Sometimes it fades away. Sometimes it’s a feeling more than anything. Sometimes I don’t notice. And sometimes I speak”

Reaching, Lance took Allura by the hand

“It’s okay, Allura. You didn’t mean to. What you said could mean any number of things and not everything you see happens... right?”

“This is true. There have been times when I’ve had such intense feelings for them to fade in a moment of felt déjà vu with no real conclusion. Perhaps it’s the change in your quintessence? Being with Keith has mellowed it muchly. You’ve always had such a soft feeling, but now I feel Keith’s energy in yours. He’s very soothing and compliments your quintessence so well. Maybe I detected an underlying fear? I’m afraid I’m not much use”

Allura tried to laugh it off. Keith feeling a bit of a douche for wanting to yell at her

“You’re plenty of use. You’re practically my sister. You’ve been a beautiful person since the first day I met you”

Allura giggled, raising her head as she covered her mouth

“I remember that. I remember the first time I came to your house. You asked if I was angel... Coran brought me to see you. I seem to remembered you hadn’t spoke in some time”

“Mami called him because of the nightmares. I couldn’t sleep and I was seeing things because of it. Then you showed up and were the prettiest girl I’ve ever met”

“And you asked if I wanted to hide in your closest from the monsters”

“Yeah. I don’t know why, but sometimes I miss the closest”

“Until Veronica and Luis locked you in there”

Allura was teasing, Lance going tense as she stepped on a bad memory. Their friend clearly waiting for a reply, Keith butting in

“Babe, we should check dinner and get that wine organised. Allura, Krolia’s the got the scan photos if you want to take a look”

“Oh, yes please! You have no idea how much I missed you. I would love to see how much these precious ones have grown”

Sacrificing Allura to Krolia, Allura was happy to let Krolia brag about the twins. Coran followed them into the kitchen area, leaving Keith without the opportunity to ask Lance how he felt about what Allura had said. Sighing deeply as he checked the slow cooker, Lance poked at the contents, then let out another sigh

“Babe?”

“I hope you feel like mush. It’s mush for dinner”

Coming up behind Lance, Keith peered over his boyfriend’s shoulder at their dinner

“That’s doesn’t look right. I mean... that’s not how I remember it”

“Nope. The vegetables have lost all structure. Can you get out the blender and hand me a fork? I’ll try fishing out what’s mostly intact then I’ll blend it and stir back into the sauce. If we’re lucky the wine and the taste of the beef would have gotten rid of most of the vegetable taste”

Ignoring the old rule that “Two’s company and three’s a crowd”, Coran moved to peer into the slow cooker from Lance’s right side

“I’m afraid I don’t know what to say about this. I remember less of those pesky vegetables when Miriam cooked”

Lance sighed at Coran as Keith mentally adjusted his rating of Coran. The man going up with his dislike of “pesky vegetables” where they didn’t belong. He’d gone down a fraction due to Allura’s foresight nearly killing their dinner plans by upsetting Lance internally.

Poking at the remains of broccoli, Lance shook his head at the mess in the pot

“Krolia added mixed vegetables while Keith and I were out. She’s made an apple tea cake for dessert”

Coran hesitant in asking

“And how did that go?”

“It was nice knowing you all... and I’d like to remind everyone that I get first dibs on the bathroom”

Lance was being brutal. Brutally hilarious. Mami would have been appalled, but Keith loved it. He didn’t want to try Krolia’s cake either... and her trying to feed him broccoli, this wouldn’t be forgotten or forgiven anytime soon. That his mother would bake left him clueless. Maybe one day they’d meet someone who wasn’t as weird as the rest of them, yet Keith highly doubted that possible.

[bibibuckleyy]

my thoughts on ‘The taking of Dispach 9-1-1′

this was SUCH a good episode from start to finish! *pulls out a slide show* Now i’ll show you breaking down every. single. scene-

jk lmao...unless?

spoilers below the cut!

lord. have. mercy.

these hoes are givin me major heist vibes

tiffany bby ur the driver but for me to acknowledge you as such you better be Letty Ortiz good hun

wow these thugs are a lot my organized than i first thought like i know they was carryin guns but i aint know they was packin this much like damn

Oceans 8 who?

so i wanna know where they just...got a cop car???

OH HELL NAH Y’ALL BEST NOT MESS WITH TERRY

I MEAN ANA MAY BE HIS SISTER

AND  SHE MAY BE MAKIN MOVES ON EDDIE 

BUT IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE TERRY FLORES SO YOU GET YOUR GUN AWAY FROM SUNSHINE BBY

it’s kinda funny rewatching this scene when you know what’s about to go down

like i’m cacklin like ‘oh shooooot dramaaaa’

but i’m also like ‘SOMEONE GRAB JOSH AND RUN’

“temporary maintenance, happens all the time” cool cool cool 

i’m not freakin out you’re freakin out

josh and maddie are like friend goals i love their dynamic like yoooo

hi yes could you please get that gun away from terry’s head i would really appreciate it.

OMG SECURITY DUDE NOOOO

wow ur like the only line of defense in the dispatch center and they just kicked ur ass

is this where our tax dollars are goin??

fly high josh’s mug, fly high

that absolute look of fear on his face tho, still breaks my heart

josh russo defense squad post up homies

“i love you, howie” nope nope nope didn’t like it the second time either

when that gun went off

LET ME TELL YOU

i just,,,waited for the blood to start comin out of terry

thank god it wasn’t him

good scene lmaooo 9-1-1 writers i hate you all lmao lmao

“bees are the least of your troubles here, sweetheart” I HATE YOU DUDE

someone call mama grant please

“we’ve got dispatch” i do not like this ma’am i’d like to speak to the manager

“you’ll shoot us” man shut the hell up-

“no, we’ll shoot the person next you you” this dude is insane

lookin like mr.clean’s evil cousin LMAOOOOO

“you only do something like this so you can do something...worse”

um whAT-

“you’re being paranoid, she’s fine” CHIMNEY NO NO NO

i don’t think i’ve ever thrown this much popcorn at my tv in my life

as chimney said “don’t do it man” just picture a 5′5 lightskinned girl tripping over her blanket while yelling “DO IT CHIM, DO IT!” and you’ll have me

“sorry, we are experiencing a high call volume” BITCH MORE LIKE A HIGH CRIME VOLUME SOMEBODY GET MAMA GRANT DAMNIT-

*screams* BUUUUUUUUCK 

HI BBY

ooh nice shirt, i guess pink isn’t the only color that suits ya

he looks good in all the colors

whole damn snaaaaack

not to be an idiot on main but seriously, who watches the watchmen?

“i miss like an earthquake or something?” lmao chim is a whole vibe

“wait....why are you calling 9-1-1, is everything ok?” paired with that cute adorable concerned face he made is making me cry ok we don’t deserve buck T-T

“she’s at the call center, what could happen?” AT LOT ACTUALLY

OH THANK YOU JESUS IT’S ATHENA FUCKIN FINALLY 

*cries* mama grant you won’t believe the day i’ve had

“he’s my husband” LMAOOOOO WHAT

whoa tiffany we’ve already had our fair share of mail bombs here that bet’ not be what i think it is

THE PACKAGE IS VIBRATING AND BLINKING TAKE COVER-

ohhhhhhhhhh

it’s just takin out the security systems lmao 

“technical difficulties” BITCH MORE  LIKE CRIMINAL DIFFICULTIES

“i bet this woman really thinks you’re...worthwhile.” JOSH BBY DON’T LISTEN TO A WORD HE SAYS EVERYONE LOVES YOU

ahaha thanks i did not need those flashbacks it hurt enough the first time 

“a woman called about an omelet, i dispatched an officer”

“to the restaurant?”

“not exactly”

???

“i tried calling josh, but no answer” aww josh and buck are friendssssss :)

JOSH HAS BEEN ADOPTED BY THE FIREFAM PASS IT ON

:0

JOSH YOU GENIUS

YOU SMART SMART CINNAMON ROLL

MAMA GRANT IT’S TIME TO MAKE SOME MOVES

“nO NO CHIMNEY DON’T HANG UP!” i shouldn’t have laughed so hard

oh great he’s hastily grabbing his jacket. he’s about to do something rash and irresponsible

....someone call eddie.

that’s some good heist music right there

the bad guys look stressed....good.

“you’re here so i can keep an eye on you and make sure you don’t do anything foolish” BUT YOU LEFT BUCK

OK BUCK I LOVE YOU BBY

BUT YOU HAVE THIS HABIT OF TURNIN INTO SPECIAL AGENT 007 REAL FAST WHEN YOUR FRIENDS ARE IN TROUBLE MAN

LIKE

HE’S THE ‘EVERYONE BEFORE ME’ MEMBER OF THE FIREFAM

mama grant i ain’t questionin your authority or nun but like???

WHY WOULD YOU NOT KEEP AN EYE ON BUCK TOO?

HE’S THE MOST LIKELY CANDIDATE TO DO SOMETHIN STUPID

thats some reckless drivin there buckaroo

buck who were you tryna fool tho

athena only knows one golden retriever dude in this city who drives a grey and black jeep

“ok now, don’t be mad” LMAOOOOOOOO

HANDS DOWN ONE OF MY FAVE SCENES

HE KNEW HIS MOM WAS PISSED TOO LMAOOOO

athena’s look is sending meeeeee 😂😂

omg my god😭😂

“hey buck”

“...hey chim”

athena has some dumbass kids yo

the best part is, she knows it

the way mr. clean broke his neck when dude said ‘police cruiser’ LMAOOOO

“and if it’s not normal?”

“we’ll find out”

*blasts boss bitch*

i love the way buck is kinda concerned for his mom tho

and athena’s just like ‘it’s no sweat sweetie i do this every day’

“shoot her”

BITCH I HOPE THE FUCK YOU DO

YOU’LL BE A DEAD SON OF A BITCH

I’LL TELL YOU THAT

“shoot her, now”

try her bitch, see what happens to yo ass. 

the 118

the call center

the entire fandom 

we will collectively end you

“we got a report of a code 77″

THANK GOD THAT GOT ATHENA OUT OF THERE

what is a code 77 you say?

“ambush, proceed with caution”

well it sure nuff aint indecent exposure

*boss bitch keeps playing cause that was super smart for her to give out a code 77*

“maddie is smart, she can take care of herself until help gets there”

HELL YEA SHE CAN

SHE KICKED DOUG’S ASS SHE’LL KICK YOURS TOO

“they’re not gonna wanna leave behind a room full of witnesses”

i’m-i’m fine, i swear-

“killing people, your solution to every problem”

excuse me? do i hear morals??

they’re really fighting each other

they some grade a stupid right there 

there’s no way they are pullin this off

terry

terry what are you doing

TERRY

RUN TERRY RUN GO GO GO

OH SHIT

JOSHHHHHHHH

i thought they were gonna shoot terry

BUT JOSH CAME THROUGH IN THE CLUTCH

wowwwwww dispatch is a lot more badass than i thought

these dudes are hard core

OH

OH JOSH NO BBY

THAT LOOKS LIKE IT HURT

aii square tf up mr. clean we don’t hit josh here and you gon have to pay for that one

the way everyone is just quietly sobbing tho

it saddens me

“I need another thirty minutes”

i’m really enjoying watching this dude’s plan crumble around him

swat posted up aii i see yall

“we’ll try to get eyes in a damn windowless room”

well when you put it that way it sounds like this is hopeless

“i’m sorry i thought you were crazy”

“i’m sorry i wasn’t”

wow i don’t think i was supposed to laugh at that

and chim bein concerned for maddie is literally one if the best things ever y’all.

completely unrelated note, anybody else see bad boys for life?

“yeah i’m ok, my ears are just ringing a little” with the TEARS and the SNIFFLES and him SMILING THROUGH THE PAIN JOSH IS TOO PURE FOR THIS 

“why do you think we asked for so many RA units?” BITCH I KNOW YOU FUCKIN LYIN

for those of y’all that ain’t kno, RA units are rescue ambulance units

way to reassure people, lady

it’s like she said ‘everyone might be lightly shot by the time this is all over’

“so you are worried. it makes sense, cause all your friends keep dissappearing are they even in the same building?” WITH THAT LOOK OF STRAIGHT SPITE DAMN MADDIE BUCKLEY, DAMNNN

we stan the BAMF BUCKLEYS

“oh my god, LINDA??” lo key thought this was real for a second

“latex! is there latex in your gloves?” greg come on man you planned a heist you can’t be this stupid

SURPRISE! LINDA IS ALLERGIC TO BEES

ENJOY YOUR EPINEPHRINE ASSHOLE

OH

OH WOW

WOW DISPATCH

Y’ALL JUST-

WOW

EVERYONES GOT GUNS AND EVERYTHING OH MY GODDDDD

GIVE IT UP FOR DISPATCH 

you know it’s really funny, cause tiffany ain’t nowhere to be found

“next one goes in your head” OOOOOOOOOOOH SHE’S A BOSS ASS BITCH BROOO YESSSSSSS

(i know, two different songs, but ya gotta admit, it applies)

“you don’t get to die” 

i just-

hands down, most powerful line in the whole episode.

it’s an odd form of vengeance, saving the man that attacked you multiple times from the release of death

 that’s what it would’ve been tho

a release

he would’ve died, and he wouldn’t of had to pay for any of his actions

but instead, josh saved his sorry ass

so he gets to pay for this in the land of the living

the best revenge, actually

and, josh saved a life

he’s worthwhile

“i’m not goin back” well i knew mr. clean was gonna die from the beginning sooooooo

“we’ve got dispatch”  and it’s finally over

i’m kinda bummed that we didn’t get to see SEAL!buck or the rest of the firefam but we got  BAMF!dispatch and that was enough lmao

kudos to those off duty dispatches as well, like y’all just walked past the dead body and moved on from the whole hostage situation to do your already stressful job

CHIM’S FACE WHEN HE SEES MADDIE I AM SOBBING

THEY SAID MADNEY RIGHTS Y’ALL😭😭😭

this hug is everythinggggg 

lo key buck watching from afar breaks my heart ahaha

“she already has everything she needs”

....this is tea for another day, but...

buck, you do know people need you as much as you need them, right?

....right?

still not over that hug tho

ayeeee wassup bobby!

how was the camping trip i was extremely against?

oooooh i love the crime recaps!

i may or may not have been like buck in the bank episode when he said ‘i’m some confused, can you start over’

...ahem....

“wait....you didn’t round her up too?”

ok listen....

while i don’t condone stealing and and the extreme amount of violence they used,

i do condone outsmarting men that think less of you because you are a woman

you are a boss tiffany, and i’m actually kind of sad you got caught

“tiffany was the real mastermind” can i just.....

*BLASTS BOSS BITCH FROM THE ROOFTOPS CAUSE WOMEN OWNED THIS EPISODE! THEY WERE SO DAMN BADASS*

thanks 9-1-1 writers for that, btw. 

gotta admit, as much as they rip out our hearts and stomp on em, they know what they are doin

jake you shady shady bitch

ngl tho both plans were solid 

maybe if it was done completely by women it would’ve worked :)

“looks  like your trip’s been delayed...by about 5 to 15 years” athena you got the best lines yo

jake f’ed up the other plan too lmaoo

like i said, if it was all women, they would’ve pulled this off

and they end it with madney

gosh i loved this episode

So! These were my thoughts on 3x14! Let me know what you think, and hit up my ask box if you want me to post my thoughts on another episode! Later taters!

Oh yeah, if you liked this you can find my thoughts on ‘Pinned’ here!

[renaer-is-allegedly-hot]

session 11 notes (i’ll fix them one day but i’m agro this was tea hate this)

Two minute one shot while dom pees

Adam has a floaty tube

Asyna can't turn into a hippo

Giant seahorse

Jane austen

Elizabethh and darcy my hands are shaking

Dom has 4e books

Dom was pretty out of it last session

It's afternoon

Dom is toasty

In jacob's other campaign a goat bit off his penis so the goat's name is richard byter

"at first the goat was reluctant"

"what a goat"

Last week on dragon heist

We were meandering through the city

"one of you met with an old friend, briefly"

Zoo time

Aerana knows where the zoo is in the sea ward

Raised brick gate w high walls; on top are intricate metal railing spiked stuff

Entrance is v wide, not too many people going in bc it's raining a lot

Maybe

Apparently the weather is super important and I still don't know why the weather is so important

It is currently raining

Pouring

Ticket booth in the front

Gold piece per person

Botanic repository

We walk up to the booth covering ourselves w the hoods we have

Velvet rope line but we just navigate through it like in shrek

Adam goes first

Walks in and see smiling figure, human male middle-aged, heavyset, festive outfit, "thank you for visiting - oH how's it going?!" it's volo

He's doing research for his newest obok

Hi jacob's dad

Jacob's gonna go fishing

Volo under impression he would be one of zoological experts but no

"recommendations?"

They brought monsters in from the isle of chault

Points us off to the exhibit to go

Originally zoo was not a zoo as we think of but like throwing them in a pit and being like look at them think httyd

Now it's closer to what we'd consider a modern day zoo

Lots of foliage

It's a big zoo

Like the San diego zoo

Or disneyland

Dom talks abt his brother's haircut

We can run through it

Can asyna just sprint

Aerana and asyna r gonna run

Adam cel and theo r gonna not run

Most of the zoo taken up by exhibits devoted to the island

Looking in the entryway a lot of ppl r carrying pamphlets n papers and speaking in foreign tongues like tourists or smth ig

Adam casts disguise self to make him look as fancy as everyone else

Has feathered cloak

Three major pathways

Chault exhibits for weird stuff r left

Marine stuff and some chault r forward

To the right r monsters from the interior continent

Adam cel and theo (?) go to the right

Most ppl r in pairs

A lot of biologist-type ppl; ppl who look like they're used to handling animals

First real exhibit on the right is a human woman inside the exhibit throwing down pieces of meat to lions

Is asyna a moon druid ? Yes

How did the human woman get there ? But she doesn’t notice

"does this zoo have dippin dots" - lillian 2020

Perception check, 15

There r ppl selling stuff, sees dejected gnome sitting under a pedal cart w a dingy umbrella and he's grumpy n angry

Adam walks over to him

Selling diff snacks n refreshments

He's mostly selling a fizzle pop

Strawberry flavor, blueberry, butterfly flavor

"are ur fizzle pops made w organic butterflies ? Bc I'm kinda on a diet rn"

Adam says it's disgusting

"I'll have a blueberry thank you"

Cel is gonna try the butterfly one

It's sweet; doesn't taste like blood but does taste almost nutty

So like what I would think pistachio tastes like

Fun size popsicle

Theo gets strawberry

They go to the next exhibit

A really vertical exhibit

 Oneshot

Cel is gonna try and ride seahorse asyna but rolls a nat 1 for acrobatics and then a nat 1 for dex save

Smashes head on rim of the pool, bleeding out and unconscious

Healing words from adam

Climbs out of the pool

The water is now red

Three children on the other side of the pool

One of them gets really excited and pees when adam tells them that there's a chemical that turns pool water red

Asyna left the pool when the kid peed

Asyna leads everyone over to the hospital

Adam is gonna try and healing words fix cel

Cel is back to full health

One of the kids is crying scared when she finds out the water is blood

Theo is gonna go get the kids ?

Ok back to the zoo

There's a hippo exhibit

We go check it out

On the way there run into different typical zoo stuff

Apes

Monkeys

The younger ppl r around these exhibits

A lot of closed sections bc of weather like "don't worry next winter this animal will be back"

Alligators

Ringtails that r lemurs ringtail lemurs

Birds

Carefully curated trees that r uber high

Hawks and giant eagles

Oops my phone froze

Tap on the glass to say hi to the what now

Theo wants it to come say hi to her

Animal handling check, 10

Can't attract their attention but

The hippos

Asyna has speak with animals LMAO

Basically can't talk to worms

No more tapeworm talk :/

"Theo says hi . This is theo"

"everybody gangsta until they find out jacob thinks barney is a hippo" - dom 2020

Colombian drug lord one time built private zoos and the hippos broke out but now there's a hippo problem in colombia

Pablo escovar

Speak with animals is ten minutes

We're also probably fighting later

We're gonna talk to the hippos

Theo waves

One of them paddles over and tries to sniff

"hm . Can you eat it ?"

"pleaes don't"

 I just remembered seaweed is not a plant it's an algae

This hippo does not have a name

Calls sister sister

"ask about juicy hippo gossip" - adam

"no but if I did I would share it"

Originally zoo was place for research

Anything else to ask hippos before we check out rare animals ?

The hippo floats away and we say bye

To the chault exhibits

Getting late but there r a lot more researchers

First exhibit has a lot of strange, unfamiliar trees

Monkeys w really big fluffy sideburns clustering around overhanging branches bc it's raining

Some of them r taking leaves and using them to keep the rain off

One of the monkeys hops off the branch

The sideburns actually extend into wings and it goes to another branch

"it's like the wizard of oz"

"adam what's the wizard of oz"

Flying monkeys

Adam walks over to a researcher and asks the most must-see

Woman who is probably from chault bc wearing strange woven beret w branches n stuff

Alien to anything they've seen

"I would point you in the direction of the behemoths"

"what are behemoths"

Adam rolls nature check

9, he doesn't know what a behemoth is

She is from chault

Behemoths r considered friends there

Asyna and aerana know where chault is

Everyone else just knows chault is v far away, almost like a nightmare story told to children

Described as a hellscape

"I'd sooner go to chault than-"

Asyna and aerana know chault is a massive island to the sw of the sword coast, home to v tropical, intensely humid climate w lots of rain + some invasions in the past but now things r opening up

We're gonna check out the behemoths

From a distance, this exhibit much larger than others, much more heavily excavated

Not so much walls as railing looking into a deep cavern

All manner of plant life brought in to accommodate the creatures

Huge lizard of some kind

Huge size category

Irl a horse is large

Humans and dwarves are medium

Exhibit says it's a macetail behemoth

Ground trembles w each step of the behemoth

Slow, ponderous

Gigantic armored lizard w tough plating on its back and spikes on the sides of its head w bony, protective coverings all over it

Massive swinging tail protruding bone swinging back and forth as it walks

Looks like that one dinosaur

We would call it an ankylosaurus

Things that go over my head : see description bullet points before this

Tail end of speak with animals

Asyna can turn into dinosaurs

"you look really cool do you have a name"

One of them looks up but doesn't really respond

Doesn't answer

Look for velociraptors

Gonna look at all the exhibits

Spirehorn behemoths

Faces almost look like shields

Triceratops

Alien to us tho

I can't believe that like as dom's explaining these everyone else can like ,, imagine it

Like that's crazy they see pictures inside their heads

Feathered behemoths

Occasionally jump around

Claws and walk around on two legs

Bloodspike behemoth

Stegosaurus, baby and two parents

Asyna can turn into a deinonychus

We have enough time for one more exhibit

We see a creature alone in its pen save for two researchers dropping treats in front of it, other has a pickaxe and is tapping the ground and scooping smth up trailing the creature and brushing it into a bin

Creature reflects rainbow of colors ? I think

Huge snail, has three eyestalks but they kind of droop down and have heavy spikes off each individual one

Cel reads description

Flail snail?

It's a big boi

Described not as a beast but as something that comes from a realm of earth

As it moves it excretes glass

Generally docile but if prodded r really dangerous bc the things it has r more weapons than eyes

Adam asks if it's a petting exhibit

The flail snail is just as slow as a regular snail

"that is the most disgusting magic resistance I've ever seen in my entire life" - jacob 2020

Everything starting to shut down

We realize we should probs skedaddle

Time to find loser boy

Rain has not stopped but has kinda calmed down

Heading straight to the wig shop

Lamps in the trades ward r lit

Brighter than what we've seen recently

Adam peers into the shop

Perception check

6, tries to get water off the window, looks empty

Theo's gonna pick the lock

25, it's a simple lock and theo gets it open easily

Shop is empty

Somewhat eerie for those without darkvision bc the mannequins

Cel will go and investigate the back room, door is locked

Theo tries opening again

23, opens easily

Immediately smells weird powder

A lot of the perfumes for preserving dyes n stuff kept back here

Cel makes a perception check

16

V organized, neat and tidy

Manhole cover in the back

Sewer system v advanced in waterdeep but also means there's a lot of it

A lot of ppl will build over sewer openings bc cheaper real estate

"sewer access authorized city officials only"

Adam rolls nat20 for boxes

Looking for anything necromancy related, licking things, doing all manners of investigation

Feels a small leather sack, pulls it out, kinda heavy

Opens it up, sees coins that are kind of heavier and thicker; not silver, 5 platinum pieces

Platinum is 10 gp each

Could take the platinums

Scry the money and sack

There are cupboards at the front desk

Necromancy considered suspicious, looked down upon

"ah . It's like watching anime ." - jacob 2020

"no, it's not like watching anime" - dom 2020

The art itself is not a crime but the things that occur in tandem w it r usually crimes

Discussing what to do in character

Cel insight check, 16

Earlier dom mentioned we're aware many ppl in waterdeep use the sewers to traverse unseen in the city; kinda suss the building was built on top of a sewer

Adam is borrowing aerana's warhammer

Adam hits the floor, leaves big dent and a v loud sound

Cel makes strength check w advantage w crowbar

Rolls a 12, can't get it open

Can sort of shift it up

Adam smashes a jar over the floor

Dex check, 5

Cloud of neon yellow sprays out like a cloud of dust and smoke, just the color

Covered in bright yellow dye

Theo tries lockpicking

23, lock is more difficult and takes a little longer, but eventually it opens

Once it's opened, the chains undo themselves and snake out on their own accord

It's just a dark hole

Can see a short drop that leads to a staircase

Adam holds lantern

Cel's just gonna go w adam at the front, pitch dark

Darkvision lets us see to some extent; everything is in grayscale

Lantern beam does help us see a little

Asyna closer to front as well

Leads to a room, 10' x 20'

Descending down short flight of stairs, room totally bare save for a barred door that u can see out of, also locked

Hear faintly some water

Theo rolls 23 for lockpicking

Door opens

Adam investigating room for secret door, tunnel, anything

Investigation check, 10 and 5 for investigation checks

Look around but room is barren

Nothing stashed anywhere, nothing to indicate a secret door or anything

Adam and cel step out, to immediate right extends for 10ish feet before merging into wall

Directly in front is water and like a sewer river flowing to the right

"are there any rats" "make a perception check" "nat 1"

To left, passage curves so hard to see but for at least 40 or so feet the pathway continues

Adam rolls another 5 for investigation check

We eventually get to a small stone bridge

I FORGOT I RESEARCHED THE SEWER SYSTEMS idk if I should bring it up I brought it up

A 15 intelligence check

Waterdeep's sewers are a subject of fascination for the city

You know the passageway like the one ur in often has arteries or iron doors set in them leading to different areas

Also know sometimes due to poor planning or smth some areas without walkways also have access tunnels

There's a bridge ? Nasty water under it

Over the bridge we go

Cel rolls a 22, plenty of damp areas around ,, no light in the passage, walking for a minute or so and w each step just hear a wet squelching noise; we're leaving behind wet, muddy footprints

No sign of recent mud in front of us

10 minutes go by and every once in a while pass side arteries w more sewage flowing in

This part seems relatively well planned

Can only go straight ? No other curvature in the path

Traveling south

"I'm gonna try and get that rat" - adam 2020

Adam picks up the rat for sleight of hand check

22

"you're able to grab up that rat pretty good" - dom 2020

Adam holds rat out to asyna and tells her to do her thing

"hey buddy"

"uh you have to cast your spell first"

"hey pal how's it going"

"let me go"

"uh we'll let you go if you answer some of our questions"

"don't even"

"no he's saying don't eat him"

"my friend here holding you is gonna take a big chomp of you if you don't answer our questions"

"have you seen anyone"

"don't know"

"I open my mouth"

"I kind of want to squeak" - marguerite 2020

Rat points north

Adam wants a piece of string to tie onto the rat like a leash

Adam is starting to feel short of breath after 10 minutes of walking

"that's either from the powder . Or the key"

Adam doesn't feel indigestion right now just that it's difficult to get air

Adam tries to tie a leash to the rat

Dex check

Nat1

Rat runs away

We go back the way we came, another 10 minutes, we pass three of those stone bridges

Cel investigation checks the dead end again, adam will give bardic inspiration

"Open sesame" - song

18, nothing there

It's a maze, we'll try naya

Adam takes out sack of platinum

Naya appears, looks around and shudders and bounds away

Following the deer

Naya is guiding back to where we originally where

Moving south again

Looks at passage back again passage then vanishes

Naya was standing on one of the bridges

First artery

It's a passage

We gotta wade through the sewer

Aerana readies weapon

Wading through, halflings get disgusting smth in their boots

Passage goes 20 ft before turning on a diagonal, turn onto passageway then it extends v far into distance

"adam's adding to the sewage right now probably" - jacob 2020

Adam's feeling lightheaded

Cel makes medicine check on adam

Rolls a 6, don't know what's wrong bud

Adam rolls around in the sewer water to get the powder off ??

I guess he is

Adam makes a constitution save, a 3

OH? OH NO

The yellow stuff is off but adam is smeared in shit

Did I make a good or bad decision

We keep going but adam feels better like fine like nothing's wrong

Oh no adam's gonna die it's like hypothermia where u feel super hot at first then u die

Passageway stretches on for awhile until coming across a rusty ironed door raised so that we'd have to step up to access it

Aerana makes perception check on the door, 20 not a nat

Hears people shouting and what appears to be a cat

Can't tell if the shouting is bad or not

Theo wrings out cape

Go up to the door, realize there's no lock; the entire lock has fallen out bc the door is so rusty

Adam checks door for traps, 12 investigation

Does not appear to be trapped, looks p old

Adam is in middle, cel towards back, aerana at front

About 25' ahead is a wider chamber and a door set into the wall, the areas are lit

We already walked through the rusty door

Massive screeching sound that came from the door when u opened it

Gotta b stealthy

Door to the right is unlocked

Adam opens the door open, looks like a storage room w different crates and sacks; bland

Some water barrels, adam pours it on himself; the rest of us also do it

Moving into room adjacent to passageway; triangle things in the wall has arrow stuff to make it easier to fire from but the room looks abandoned

Deeper in we go

Don't go that far but hit a wider room extending out 40'

Center of the room; at one point looks like there was a wall covering the room but has since collapsed; several ppl looking at us

Far corner opposite to us is an old halfling man in dark robes, clutching wound at chest, long gray braid down back staring at us as if he heard we were coming

In front of him are two smiling skeletons

It's the necromancer

The skeletons r also looking at us

They appear to be guarding him

In front of skeletons are three kenku looking at us

Bingbong is not one of the kenku

"I can explain" - adam

"we came down here and I was covered in shit and" adam casts pyrotechnics centered in between skeletons and kenku

Initiative

Aerana, 19

Cel, 17

Asyna, 15

Adam, 15

Theo, 9

Aerana

Holds attack, if kenku move within 5 ft of her she'll attack

Cel

Skeletons have bows and shortswords

Kenkus have shortswords

Will hold an action if attacked

Skeletons

Appear to b human skeletons, medium size

Lash out at kenku

One kenku able to parry away an attack, other skeleton slashes another kenku

Asyna

Attacks kenku closest to her, the one not hit

15, "what are you attacking with" "iiiiiiiii don't knowwwwwwwwwww"

Asyna turns into ape

Runs up to terrified kenku

Swings both times but it gets out of the way and hisses like a cat

Adam

Casts pyrotechnics on kenku

One passes, one fails

Failed one is blinded for next turn

Cutting words on the kenku by asyna

Kenku

Blind

Tries to escape, skeleton misses and kenku staggers away and starts feeling way along wall and runs into room west of where we are

Other one

Makes attack on skeleton, half of ribcage slashed but it's still standing

Other other one

Tries to attack ape, misses

Halfling

Stands up, tries to flee

Theo

Hits kenku that tried to get asyna, 5 damage

Has sneak attack, deals 12 damage

Arrow shot into neck, still alive but not for long

Aerana

13 damage to other kenku

"how do you want to do this"

Kenku drops dead

Skeleton turns smiling to aerana

Cel

15 to hit, 6 damage, dead

"how do you want to do this"

Pulls arrow back as far as she can "and I don't know if it's bingbong, but I'm gonna pretend it's bingbong and shoot it right through his eye socket"

"I want to keep bingbong as a pet" - jacob 2020

"kenku are sentient beings, that would be slavery" - dom 2020

Looking around we see the bodies of three other kenku and remains of two other skeletons

The skeletons attack aerana

One hits, 3 damage

Asyna

Goes into the room to follow the halfling and the kenku

Some kind of exit around

The blinded kenku is in here

Can reach halfling or kenku

Marguerite wants to hug the halfling

Athletics check to do it

21

Old man screams but asyna can hold him, unable to escape

Kenku still feeling around on the floor

Adam

Follows asyna

Gonna cast sleep

Kenku falls asleep

Yells over at the halfling

"can you call off your skeletons please"

Halfling

Loser boy's turn

I don't remember how to spell losser unless it's losser

Tries to escape asyna's grasp

"he does not escape your grasp"

Asyna rolls another athletics check

17, he does not escape

Theo

14 to hit, 16 damage

"how do you want to do this"

Arrow to the skull just goes really far in and the skull falls off as do misc bones

Aerana

Misses hit

Tries to thrust forward w sword but it drops and contracts, sword slipping through ribcage

Cel

19 to hit

8 damage, hits shoulder and arm falls off

Skeleton

Misses

Asyna

Waddles the halfling over to adam

Gives him a little squeeze

Adam

baned halfling

And cutting words

No cutting words nvm

Halfling

Asyna rolls a 25

Can't squirm out

"unhand me there are more of them there are more kenku"

Theo

"ok. Bye bye skeleton boy"

22 to hit

12 damage

"how do you want to do this"

Hits him in the smile; teeth knocked out and all of it collapses like a xylophone type noise as the bones hit the floor

Out of combat

Aerana ties up sleeping kenku

Adam casts charm person

Cel is gonna loot

Investigation check, 7

10 gold combined on the kenku; takes

Halfling is charmed to consider adam a dear old friend

Says he just finished work on his new purse; his fanny pack (basically)

Not sure we recognize the material

Adam says he knows who sent the kenku

"you have the stone"

"they stole it from me"

Says he randomly found a nice stone from a rat

Adam puts his hand on loser boy's shoulder and asks if he wants to work from home

Trying to convince loser boy to come with us

Declines

The purse is made out of elf skin

Bc it's supple

Adam trying to get a magical weapon out of loser boy

Has a potion that protects from necromancers

Persuasion check, 24

Goes into side closet

Damage resist potion

Aerana kills him

Wow are you ?? Desensitized ?? Are you desensitized or does it help not being able to see anything ever

Adam rummages through loser boy's desk

Investigation check, 15

False bottom to one of the desk drawers w 100 gold inside

Cel investigation checks loser boy, 13

Finds a little wand w a skull tip

Adam is gonna look at the purse

This bag is a faint gold

Adam shakes the kenku awake, wisdom 13 saving throw

Fails

Charm person

Making dog noises

"you want to take us to your friends"

"I don't know where they are"

"then let's just go back to your base"

"get back to base ? No one knows where that is"

Adam introduces himself, mentions bingbong

Gets theo and cel's names, mimics sound of a hammer hitting metal when asked his name

His name is bonk now

Asks asyna's name, asyna is still an ape

Big hairy git

Aerana says she'll trade information for her name

Adam swings warhammer into ground to threaten kinda

Adam makes 12 insight check

We don't recognize any of the voices he uses

Asks if we live in a hole

Asks if the house is nice

Copies adam's voice for the house boom

Adam asks if he knows about the puppet

"couldn't tell you if I knew"

Nat20 adam runs insight check across entire conversation

He's lying abt not knowing where his friends are

I DFJGSLGJS THAT'S WHAT I WAS SAYING ABT US STILL GIVING UP INFORMATION ASFKJAFD

Adam asks him why he was lying

Hear a voice we've never heard before

But this one in particular is bizarre and warped as if it's through some filter

"do you know what happens when you lie to me"

Adam

Anyone w passive perception over 9 hears a bottle break and a door slam in one of the rooms to the south

Cel hits his brain basically

Some of you starting to piece together that smth strange is happening

Pattering of footsteps from room to the south

Session over for the night

[lordshaxxion]

AAALL for Cidrex because he is my favorite boy

alright u asked for it >:U all of this fuckery will be under a cut

Where were you rezzed?

“In a forest somewhere in the EDZ, I think. I don’t really remember much of it, I was pretty much immediately attacked by Fallen, so there was a lot of running for my life.”

How long ago was it?

“During the Dark Ages, so a reaaaally long time ago. Like, during the prime of the Iron Lords.”

Did you have anything in your pockets?

“Just a lump of crystal quartz, but it was rose-coloured and I guess that’s where my obsession with shiny things and collecting crystals from? Oh, I also had some old currency from the Golden Age. No idea what kinda currency, but I cleaned them up and they’re super shiny and really cool.”

What was your first week alive like?

“Stressful. It was a lot of learning how to survive and trusting my Ghost to heal any injuries and bring me back if I died. That was a shock in itself though, when I died for the first time.”

How did you react to your new role as a Guardian?

“Well I became an Iron Lord before I became a Guardian, and that was pretty alright until SIVA happened. After that, being a Guardian and being an Iron Lord became the same thing - just doing the right thing because no one else will, or can.”

Do you have any regrets?

“I couldn’t save my brothers and sisters of Iron from SIVA. Saladin has always told me that I couldn’t have saved them by myself, but I still regret not doing more to at least try.”

Does your ghost have a name?

“He’s called Socks-”

“IT’S SOX!”

“-because he used to hide in my sock drawer at the Iron Temple.”

What is your ghost like?

“He calls himself Sox because he wants to look cool, and I think he cares too much about how he looks from the perspective of other Ghosts. I dunno if Ghosts are judgy to one another, but what I do know is that Sox used to hang around a not-so-great group of them. He’s small for a Ghost and I think this group sorta... took the piss. He tries to act tough a lot, but I know that deep down he cares a lot and he does like his actual name.”

How do you feel about the last city and the vanguard?

“I was sent to the Last City by Saladin to act as a so-called ambassador between the City and the Temple, so it’s like a second home to me now. I know all the streets like the back of my hand, even the sectors I’m not really meant to venture into. The Vanguard are alright, they have their hiccups but I know they mean well and try their best. Well, the did until Cayde... yeah.”

What’s your favourite place to go?

“Cayde used to describe it as wanderlust, but I like wandering all over the Earth and seeing all the ruins and wilds there are. Though my favourite place out of all is the Lost Sector in Winding Cove. It’s so beautiful there with the glow-worms in the dark and the reflection of them in the water. Nice and quiet too, when it’s cleared out every other day.”

Do you participate in strikes or the crucible?

“Strikes. I leave the Crucible to my brother, Othion.”

How do you celebrate the holidays?

“I used to celebrate in getting blackout drunk with Cayde and the rest of the Vanguard, we even used to persuade Shaxx and Othion to join us sometimes. Now though I spend them by myself just tinkering with the stuff I’ve collected over the years.”

Who is your favourite NPC and who is your least favourite?

“It was and will always be Cayde. I can’t get along with Ada-1, though. She unnerves me and acts rather stuck-up despite allowing Guardians into the Black Armory now.”

Where do you sleep/call home?

“I have my own apartment in the Tower, of course, and unlike most Hunters that’s where I call home. It gets me weird looks though, I know a lot of Hunters prefer sleeping under the open stars and it gets Sox to tease me and call me ‘a domesticated hunter’.”

Do you have any pets or companions?

“I wanted to get a cat when Cayde was still around, but we never got round to doing it. Though I kinda have magpies that come to stay when I’m at home. I put feed out on the window sill for them and sometimes they come back with shiny trinkets for me. Oh, and I look after Colonel too, but I’m not allowed to keep Colonel in my apartment because other Hunters would throw a fit.”

Does anyone live with you?

“Cayde and I talked about it, about him moving in with me or something. Again, we never got round to it.”

How do you unwind or comfort yourself?

“It’s embarrassing to admit, but when me and Sox went exploring a while back we found a stash of what used to be called ‘stim toys’. Lots of pots of squishy clay-like dough. Sometimes if I’m overwhelmed I just dig out one of the pots and just sit there squishing it for an hour or so. In terms of general relaxation, if I have the attention span I’ll read or if I don’t then I’ll watch some movies. I got a good collection of Golden Age and pre-Golden Age movies now.”

What would truly break you?

“Losing someone close to me again. I lost Cayde and I wasn’t myself for a long time. If I were to go through that again, I really don’t think I’d recover at all.”

Most embarrassing moment?

“When Sox resurrected me for the first time after dying and I sat there crying and threw up for two hours. It wasn’t... my greatest moment.”

Any cherished memories?

“All of my time with Cayde, to be honest with you. Even when we argued, I cherish those memories greatly. Also the first time I discovered a rare crystal, that was a pretty good moment too.”

What was your highest and/or lowest point?

“Like I said, losing Cayde devastated me almost to a point of no return. Highest point? First Crimson Days with Cayde, we wrecked shop in the Crucible together and got banned in the same day! The look on Izel’s face was glorious.”

Views on the enemy races?

“I don’t like the Taken or Scorn, those are practically a given. Vex are annoying and freak me out a little. Cabal I loathe for what they did to the City, though that’s predominantly the Red Legion but whatever. Hive also freak me out now I think about it, though the worms they drop are kinda cute. Fallen? I just feel pity for them. They lost everything in their own version of the Collapse and are just trying to get by, and yet we keep attacking them.”

Which enemy race is your most/least favourite?

“I hate the Scorn for what they did. On the flip side of that, I rather like the Fallen. I got a chance to get to know a few, like Mithrax, and they’re honestly not that bad when you do get to know them.”

What’s your role in a fireteam? (Tank, support, buff/healer, comic relief? Or are you the dead weight?)

“Dead weight.”

“No you aren’t, Cidrex, you’re a sniper.”

Do you have any mentors/mentees?

“Saladin and many of the original Iron Lords were my mentors, but I don’t have any mentees. Hunters ask me for advice every so often, but I don’t give it. I don’t want to be in that position, I’m not a good teacher.”

What is your favourite weapon type/favourite weapon?

“Give me my DARCI and I’m good to go. I like auto rifles a lot though, despite me using snipers a lot I’m not that great up close so it’s easier for me to just kinda spray and pray without the instability of SMGs.”

Do you play Gambit?

“Sometimes. It can get really stressful trying to deal with invaders that use utter bastard weapons.”

How do you feel about the Drifter?

“I don’t know. Everything about his operations just tell me that I can’t trust him at all, but then I got to know him better and I just feel... kinda sad?”

If you could be any class/subclass (not just your own), what would you be and why?

“Striker Titan, cuz it looks like fun and a great stress and tension relief. Though, I’d like to be able to use Gunslinger properly, I’ve never been able to use it all that well even when Cayde tried to teach me. I’d just like to do it, for him.”

What are your thoughts on the Nine?

“Fuckin’ weird. I don’t trust them at all, especially not after I saw the Emissary for the first time. Though Xur’s pretty cool.”

Any secret crushes or relationships we need to know about?

“Well.... there is this one guy. Hunter, but he’s built like a Titan. Got no social skills and the emotional range of a teaspoon, but he’s charming in his own way regardless.”

“It’s Ataric.”

“SOX!” @crazy-bone-lady

Does your Ghost approve, or haven’t you told them?

“Sox is a piece of shit that tries to out my crush at every given moment. Luckily, he’s a tiny piece of shit so I can just hold him in my hands and he can’t do anything.”

You’re about to go off-planet on assignment, and will only be able to eat protein rations and food gel for a month. What’s your last meal?

“I don’t really have a preferred meal or anything, so I’d just get take-out somewhere in the City. I know a couple really good joints.”

If you could take over any NPC’s job, who would it be and why?

“Cayde’s job as Hunter Vanguard. I know every Hunter has just about run for the hills, and will always do so when they hear the words ‘Vanguard Dare’, but I’d be happy to take up the position. I’ve already taken up his cloak, might as well take the job that came with it right?”

What is the most beautiful sight you’ve seen?

“When Sox and I were exploring an Io cave system, we fell through into a massive chamber filled with crystals. The light from where we’d fallen through shone on the crystals in such a way it created an utterly breathtaking spectrum of colour. We took so many photos of that moment, it was just so amazing to see all these crystalline spires lit up and practically glowing.”

“What about that sunrise in the EDZ?”

“Oh yeah, this one was pretty good.”

Do you have a favourite colour?

“Not particularly, though green’s pretty good since I dyed my hair with it.”

Show us your favourite outfit!

“Top picture, switch the pants for the Lucky Pants and you’re sorted. Bottom picture, I miss my BrayTech hood. It was super cosy, and paired nicely with the Taimat(?) chestpiece.”

What’s your favourite shader?

“New Monarchy Diamonds and Metro Shift.”

If you could make a wish to an Ahamkara for anything - no strings attached - what would you wish for?

“To save all those I failed to save. The Iron Lords, Cayde. All of them.”

[softstraykidsimagines]

Boyfriend!Seungmin Stray Kids

ALRIGHTY

Our lovely fluffy Seungmin

He’s lowkey becoming bias wrecker for me whoops

Let’s get started!!

During when he has a crush on you

Ohhhh boy

He’s gonna be insanely shy

It’s adorable

He’ll try to do little things to make you happy

From complementing you

To buying you something small like a key chain

But it’s always something meaningful

Something that reminds you of him

Let’s not discard the fact that anytime he actually does something like this for you

He’s gonna sprint away before you can even thank him properly

And he’ll hide somewhere so that you can’t see or hear him squeal with joy

Ok it’s official I am soft for Seungmin

You don’t really have too much doubt about him liking you

You’ve picked up remarkably fast how shy he is with you compared to when he’s with the rest of SK 

And you figured he had an ulterior motive when he happened to just “think of you” and buy something

Or when he teases you but quickly apologises and tells you he doesn’t mean it 

He’s just not very subtle 

So you’re rather upfront with him one day when you ask

“Soooo, I’ve been wondering…. why have you been so sweet to me? With all the nice gifts and stuff?”

He would immediately go red in the face

His eyes would go wide

And he’d just stand there a moment with his mouth hanging open not knowing wtf to do

And you feel kinda bad tbh

No one likes being in such an awkward situation so the way you just asked him out-of-the-blue seemed almost cruel

He finally managed to stutter out

“W-well umm…. I k-kinda… sort o-of l-like you…?”

It deadass took him a whole 30sec to finish

And you’re doing an Irish jig on the inside cause

WOOT WOOT he likes you too!!

“I really like you too, Seungmin” you say quickly before he can run off in embarrassment

He looks at you hella confused like

The person he’s liked for so freaking long likes him back?? Or is he dreaming??? Whatishappeningrightnow????

SeungminHasStoppedWorking.jpg

So you tell him where you want to hang out in the future

And there we go you’ve successfully planned your first date woohoo!!

Dates with this bean are soft and laid back

Ice cream dates

Coffee dates

Just wandering-around-for-no-reason dates

It’s so relaxing

Of course until one of you holds the other’s hand

Then it’s skyrocketing heart rates

And pink cheeks

At the end of your 2nd or 3rd date, he’d finally muster the courage to kiss you....

On the cheek haha you thought 

As you’re saying goodbye

Leaving you flustered af as he runs away yelling that he’ll text you later

I don’t think he’ll have the guts to kiss you first tho 

It’s up to you my friend

You’ll be sitting on a bench somewhere, just talking

And he just

Randomly

Pokes your cheek.

And you look at him like wtf man why

And he just turns away grinning

So you get cheeky, planning on making this sudden burst of confidence melt faster than snow in the sun

So you swoop in and peck his cheek

He blushes like crazy but he refuses to let you win

So he looks at you a moment

With a slight smirk on his face

Seriously where did all this confidence come from he was a shy child a minute ago tf?

And he kisses you right on the nose

Needless to say that surprised you

And spur of the moment

You decide you’re gonna kiss him smack on the lips

His eyes are wide as all hell

But he relaxes a split second later, kissing you back softly

You both part smiling slightly

Before he whisper-screeches, hiding his face in his hands, all embarrassed

And you also blush like crazy, also fighting the urge to run away

GAH THIS IS SO CUTE 

When he introduces you to the rest of the group

Oh

My god

It’s gonna be chaos I swear

Everyone’s gonna welcome you politely and enthusiastically

And then they’ll start poking fun at Seungmin

“AWWWW they’re so lovely! How on earth did you get them to date you??” Says Jisung

“I bet he pays them” replies Minho, cackling

“Must have been a lot of money” chipped in Changbin, enjoying himself 

All the while Seungmin makes a face like ‘this is the shit I need to put up with all the time good lord’

“Come on guys! Of course y/n didn’t agree to this for money” yells Jeongin

Seungmin is about to thank him when he finishes:

“They obviously came to meet me through Hyung” and he sprints off at top speed with Seungmin hot on his heels screaming bloody murder

“Please take care of him, y/n” Chan says quietly while the other boys guffaw at the two youngest’s behavior. “He really likes you”

And that’s exactly what you do

You guys have got each others back

No matter what

Someone tries to offend you in any way, shape or form 

And he’s there in front of you like a human shield ready to fight 

If he gets sick you’re there as quick as a flash with everything he needs, all the way from cold remedies to recipes for hot soup

While you’re making sure he’s not burning up, he’ll just whisper

“Can I just cuddle you? I swear I won’t sneeze on you”

So you just lie there holding each other the entire day

He keeps his promise and doesn’t sneeze on you btw

When you’re sick, he’s not gonna know what the hell to do

Lost puppy 

He’ll run around trying to find the right meds for you (he’ll take the time to read each label to make sure it’s the right one)

He’ll try to make soup it doesn’t work

But after a while he’ll calm down and sit with you to watch something on TV

Apologising that he couldn’t make your fav meal 

Makes up for it by buying takeout 

Man I want takeout now :(

He can sometimes feel down about the day

Something might have happened at the fansign/performance, he might feel really tired and fed up with work

So it’s your job to be there and comfort him 

You just wrap your arms around him and sit with his head on your shoulder 

And he cries silently with you, grateful that you’re with him 

Guess who’s emo while writing this

Sometimes days can get bad enough that he starts to shut you out all-together 

Seungmin isn’t the direct type 

He isn’t gonna start an argument because he’s stressed 

He’s gonna avoid any kind of conflict 

So he avoids you, ignores you, refuses to talk to you when he’s too upset 

Because he doesn’t want to lash out and hurt you 

But he’ll notice when he does this that it actually does hurt you 

Almost more than an argument would 

Because you want to help 

And he won’t let you 

So he’ll eventually come to talk to you, his head bowed and eyes glimmering with tears 

And he’ll just hug you, asking for you to forgive how stupid he can be 

RIGHT back to fluff because I don’t want to cry rn 

He loves to teach you to sing his parts in every song 

He feels you can understand his work better and be closer to him 

You two will end up sometimes randomly singing his part in a song at the top of your lungs in the dorm, in turn pissing off the rest of the boys 

You’ll both have singing competitions: who can sing the highest, lowest, longest, or most dramatically 

And you both end up collapsing from laughing too hard 

He’s gonna try to speak English around you 

Just so he can practice 

Have you heard his awesome accent during ASC that is a yes from me I don’t want to forget that 

He might ask you for help but he’s mostly too stubborn and proud to so he’ll struggle for a while until you ask if he wants a helping hand 

“Hey, need help for the pronunciation, there?” 

“Nope! Nope it’s fine! I’m fine! Toooootally fine” :D 

You two like trying to learn new recipes to cook for the rest of SK 

It’s actually super fun 

And you both manage to make a few dishes without setting the dorms on fire *applause* 

And you make breakfast for them too: fried eggs! now I’m really hungry aw man 

And the boys are already teasing you talking about how you’re couple goals and how well you two go together 

Making the both of you sprint back into the kitchen, giggling like children

Seungmin is gonna ask you to meet his family first 

But it doesn’t scare you that much 

For a good reason:

He’s an angel, so he must have been raised by angels logic

You meet them and they melt when they see you 

You chat, they share pictures of Seungmin when he was little he’s gonna be close to crying from embarrassment because “COME ON YOU JUST MET” 

His sister adores you 

Tells you about the pranks she’s pulled on her poor bro in the past 

Which warrants a death glare from Seungmin 

All in all his fam are your fam because they love you as much as they love Seungmin 

He’s a lot A LOT more nervous about meeting your parents 

He’s pretty damn close to fainting when the day to meet up comes 

Pale as sheet istg 

So you gotta be there for him to cling onto like a baby koala 

Save this boy I beg of you

Nearly hides behind you when he first greets your parents 

Basically leaps out of his skin every time someone raises their voice even a little bit 

But he gets a little calmer after a while 

And starts to genuinely smile and laugh 

By the end of the day he’s a happy squish with no sign of nervousness

Success! 

In the evenings he likes to buy a crap-ton of snacks and sit with you to binge watch your fav show 

You two will probs have a competition to see who can catch the most food in their mouth sigh 

He loves when you poke his left cheek 

He’ll act cute with you if he’s asking for something 

And it’s so freaking hard to say no damn it!!

He’ll have a fucking heart attack if he sees you wearing one of his hoodies or denim jackets like how many does he actually have??

But he’ll love it 

He’s gonna grin from ear to ear saying how cute you look 

Will not let you go throughout the night

Just wants to cling to you and snuggle you to death the entire evening 

You’ve probs already guessed that he is definitely not gonna be the first one to say ‘I love you’ 

Nah he’s way to shy and lowkey scared to 

But I bet you’re gonna do it kinda by accident 

You guys have been having a dance competition 

He’s gonna be jumping around all energetic and happy 

Because he’s having the time of his life messing around with you 

And you’ll accidentally let slip: 

“You’re such a dork! This is why I love you so much” 

And both of you stop laughing and stare at each other 

While you’re mentally going OH SHIT WHAT HAVE I DONE 

But Seungmin suddenly screams like a little girl 

He can’t contain himself

Runs at you at full speed 

And tackles you into a bone-crushing hug 

Making you both topple over onto the floor laughing 

Without letting you go, he’s gonna say, all giddy “I love you too!!! I was scared to say it but I’m not anymore I do love youuuuuuu!!” 

And the rest of the day you’re both skipping around, making SK wonder wtf happened to the two of you

“Are they possessed or something?” -Hyunjin 

“Who even knows with those two” -Chan  

“Guess we’ll never know” -Felix, chuckling 

Half the time they don’t get at all what happens between you two lmao 

When Stray Kids are away, Seungmin’s gonna want to FaceTime you whenever he’s free 

He’s a pouty boy who misses you senseless and forgets how to function like a proper human being when you’re not around 

SK are having to tell him specifically what to do every other minute because he keeps daydreaming about when he gets to see you again smh 

He’s gonna be so.freakin.hyper on the way back from wherever the boys were 

No one wants to sit next to him on the plane because they know all he’s gonna want to do is talk about you 

And they get enough of that on a regular basis anyway 

But they’re happy at how energetic he is when they land and he can finally see you 

He’s gonna Naruto run to you and hug you so tightly whispering how much he missed you 

And you’ll be laughing like 

“It’s been two days, buddy” 

“Yeah but it feels like AGES! It’s been an eternity and I was going insane!!” 

Seungmin most likely won’t go public about your relationship until after a year to a year-and-a-half

Wants to make sure you’re 100% ok with it 

Because he knows there will be a bit probably a lot of drama on the net about you 

He’ll post a cute selfie of the two of you 

You’re both smiling happily 

And he’ll caption it: ‘Hey everyone!! This is y/n, we’ve been together for quite a while now, and I wanted to introduce you! I hope you welcome them warmly!’ 

The internet isn’t going to shut up about you for an eternity holy shit

The entire universe ships you two 

You’re the adorable smiley couple

That everyone 

And I mean everyone 

Loves to bits 

A/N: YAY! It was really fun to write about this adorable fluff ball :D 

Also, there aren’t NEARLY as many Seungmin GIFs as there should be!

Hope everyone has a lovely day!! And feel free to request anything! Ciao <3

P.S: I love this GIF so much it’s not even funny 

[meggtheegg]

not sure if you've already done this, but Evan rankings?

YES I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS OKAY 

EDIT - I put them into chronological order because I feel iffy about listing them from “best” to “worst” because they’re all wonderful 

Ben Platt - Ben is the original. He won a Tony, and he deserved it. His portrayal is what most people think of when they hear “Evan Hansen.” He keeps Evan really specific but also very broad and open to interpretation. He’s a very relatable Evan that everyone can see themselves in, at least a little. He’s intensely emotional, his voice is stellar, and he’s just overall amazing. There’s not much I can say that hasn’t been said yet. The only reason I put the other two above him are 1. I saw them both live and have not seen Ben Platt on anything but a bootleg,  2. I do kinda have to suspend my disbelief about him being a teenager, and 3. I can’t unsee Elder Cunningham. So yeah, my own issues, not Ben’s. He’s awesome. I love him.

Michael Lee Brown - Hands down, my favorite Evan. By far. MLB is brilliant and had he been the original Evan instead of Ben Platt, I am convinced he would have gotten the Tony. His Evan is real and raw and so so emotional. His scene before You Will Be Found is the most uncomfortable thing in the world to witness, and you know he wants it that way. He stays on the floor for so long, having a panic attack so intense that his face goes red and you can see the veins in his neck and whenever you think he’s been going for long enough that he must be about to regroup, he just keeps going. He has consistent tics and fidgets that don’t feel planned or faked. He doesn’t try to justify Evan doing bad things. When he yells at Heidi or dismisses Jared, you get mad at him. But when it all comes down to it, you love him and feel empathy for him because he is so human. He makes dumb mistakes but he’s not defined by those mistakes. And he looks the part better than any of the others, in my opinion. In terms of character, I feel like actors tend to either interpret him as either having social anxiety or autism. Both are super valid and both make sense, but (probably due to personal experience) I usually tend to prefer the latter. My younger brother is Evan’s age, and he’s on the spectrum. He’s not usually crazy about theatre, but he was captivated when we took him to Dear Evan Hansen. He said it felt like he was watching himself onstage, and I don’t know if that’s Michael Lee Brown’s intention, but it sure as hell seems to be, and it sure looks like he did his research.

Colton Ryan - Colton was my second Evan, and honestly I think he is so underrated. The bootleg that’s out there does not capture what a fantastic Evan he is. He falls on the other side interpretation-wise, unquestioningly portraying anxiety, and boy does he do it well. Maybe it’s just because he’s very “conventionally attractive” or whatever, but his Evan seems like the kind of guy who could be one of the most popular kids in school if he wasn’t so afraid to talk to people. His Evan is witty and not exactly sure of himself, but he knows who he is and what he could be. He sees his own potential, if that makes sense. “Waving Through A Window” is a little less “I’m invisible and there’s nothing I can do about it” and a little more “I know what I have to do to get noticed, but the idea of that terrifies me.” His physicality is unbelievable and it makes his “Words Fail” in particular extremely powerful. In the beginning of the show, he is hunched over, looking at the floor, trying to make himself as small as physically possible without looking awkward. As the show goes on and he gets more and more confident, you can see him slowly start to stand up straighter and look people in the eye and become more and more confident, but it happens so gradually that you don’t even really notice it’s happening until a moment in “Words Fail,” where he shrivels right back down as everything collapses around him. It’s remarkable. He’s fantastic. Also, his Evan fixes some kind of problematic elements. Because of the way he plays him, his medication feels less like it was prescribed to be taken daily and more of a “take only as needed” thing. So, when his confidence grows and he stops taking it, it feels a little more like the “success” that Heidi sees it as. It’s such a little thing, but it always bugged me that a nurse would be proud of her son going off his meds. 

Noah Galvin - Noah is a wonderful comedic actor. I love him in The Real O’Neals, and I feel like if he’d been cast as Jared, he’d be very high on that list, because he’s got a real skill for finding glimmers of depth in the comic relief. But for me, personally, his Evan leaned a little too hard on comedy and that made his emotional moments a little less impactful. His singing voice is stellar and his chemistry with the rest of the cast was undeniable. I’m always happy to see him pop up in their Instagram stories. But, casting a comedic actor in an extremely serious, emotional role that’s way out of their comfort zone, though an interesting idea, is a real risk. A good friend of mine saw him and loved him, though, so again, this is very much my issue. I think I have a vision of what Evan should be, and that vision is pretty much just MLB’s portrayal, and Noah’s is the most different from his. So, yeah

Taylor Trensch - Now, quick disclaimer, I saw Taylor during Mike Faist’s final performance, so my focus wasn’t quite on him and he’s so sweet that he may very well have toned his own stuff down a little to highlight Mike, but his Evan, for me, was a little hit-and-miss. He tries a lot of new things that nobody else brings to the table and I definitely applaud him for that. It didn’t work for me, personally, but that doesn’t mean he’s not good. His Evan is less obviously anxious. He has more of a confidence issue than full-blown social anxiety, and he’s very, very friendly, even in scenes where most actors kind of have him acting like a dick. He’s obviously unaware of when he’s hurting Jared’s feelings, not actively trying to exclude him, but almost buying into the idea that Jared doesn’t like him and giving him permission to leave him alone. And when arguing with Heidi, he sees himself as a victim of her anger who doesn’t have a need to really defend himself because he doesn’t seem to see why any of it would upset her. Where other Evans are hyper-aware of how their actions affect the people around them, Taylor’s is kind of blissfully unaware of the mess he’s gotten himself into until “Good For You.” It’s an interesting take, for sure, and I can see why people really love him. Also, his scene with Heidi before “So Big, So Small” is the best out of all of them. He’s so overwhelmed and afraid to admit everything to his mom and he’s crying so hard that he can barely get the words out and it was incredible.

Ben Levi Ross -I’ve only been able to catch snippets of Ben, but so far, I enjoy his Evan. He’s going to be amazing on tour, and I’m so glad he has that opportunity. Even after only going on a few times, he’s already so good and I look forward to seeing his Evan evolve over time. As I said with his Connor, oh my lord his voice is just…so nice.

Stephen Christopher Anthony - I’ve literally only heard his WTAW but I am already in love. He’s so good.

[littlemessyjessi]

Bobcat and Raven: My Beginnings With the Craft : A Personal Experience #MagicalMonday

Hello, smoochies!

Welcome to my witchy weirdness!

Now, disclaimer here:  I do not claim to know everything or anything.  I don't claim that my way is the right way or the wrong.  This is just my way that works for me and I thought I'd share it with you.  Feel free to tweak it to your own needs but lord, here we go.

If you'd like to read more of the Witchy Weirdness series, you can find the masterlist HERE  :)

I know it's been a hot second since the last installment but I'm trying to make a nice little schedule and get things out to you when I can.  

Today's post will be a taaaaaad bit different.

So a few of you have asked me if I'd talk about my own personal experience with the craft.

For a while, I didn't see the point because we're all different and unique but then I realized....there's a lot of people out there that feel like they're alone and they're scared.

And that's ok, honeybuns...but you're not alone.

We're here with you.

Brothers, sisters, it's ok loves.  

Be afraid if you'd like and you claim your fear because that's yours.

And I guess...that's where my journey started.

I was maybe six or so at the time when I first started my path.

My great granny, bless her soul, kept me a lot back then and I was one hell of a little demon.

Her and Pap were getting much too old to deal with the likes of me but they did it anyway because my mom wasn't the best of caregivers and just basically abandoned me and when she did have me....well it just wasn't a pleasant experience let's put it like that.

So, anyway, Granny took care of me a lot.

She taught me how to cook and how to garden.

How to grow my own food and what to do with it.

Natural remedies and to thank whoever for whatever the earth gave you.

I think in a lot of ways she was my first experience with the craft even if she didn't call it that.

She...she just taught me a lot.

Ya'll forgive me if I ramble.

This is very personal and I'm bound to get emotional.

And while I've been criticized for the way I write...I just type what goes through my mind's eyes...so it's rather raw and unfiltered most of the time.

I'm sorry, lol.

Anyway, she taught me a lot and she died the year I turned thirteen.

How cliche huh?  But that's how it happened.

She died in church that Sunday and I remember very distinctly that I was upset because I hadn't been with her in her last moments.

I'd been away on a trip at the time- gone off with some friend to the mountains for some reason or another.

We were outside playing in the woods (Like we shoudn't have been without supervision) and somehow I'd gotten seperated from Sarah Beth.

I remember laughing and giggling because we'd been playing and then realizing how alone I was.

And that's when I heard it.

A little whine of sorts, this awful little sound.

I remember stomping through the mud, making my little New Balance tennis shoes completely caked in it...something I was sure to recieve a whooping for whenever I got home.

And I kept hearing this sound and I looked in this little hole/cave like area in the side of the hill (which was very stupid btw. Do not do this.  There could've just as easily been a mountain lion in there with cubs and I could've gotten my face torn off. But I digress.)

Anyway, I pulled back a bunch of mud and muck and I found this little kitten.

Now, to me it had just looked like a little tabby cat kitten.

I was too young to know the difference or to know that you should not pick up wild animals.

But I did anyway.

It was tiny and covered in what I now realize was basically amniotic fluid.

I remember freaking out because I thought it was bleeding and it was a little bit because half it's damn right ear was gone.

That's when I saw what must've been the momma...dead.  

She'd clearly been attacked and there were little kits on the ground next to her.

All dead.

No one had survived but this little stinker and it was barely kicking as it was.

Clearly, it escaped with just part of the ear missing.

So I did what you're not supposed to do...

I tucked it in my jacket and headed back to Sarah Beth who nearly killed me for running off.

Now, I know some of you might believe this next part and some of you make thing I'm totally nuts.

But I believe in reincarnation.

And I believe that that little kit was my Granny being reborn into this world again.

I know some of you think I'm nuts.

But here's the kicker.

That was a bobcat.

And no I should not have touched it.  

Especially when I saw the momma but it just didn't click in my head.

Now the reason that this is so important is because my Granny's nickname was Bobcat.

Pap called her that since they were children and they lived just down the street from each other.

He used to call her "Kitty" when she was little because she was a touch me not and then when she developed an attitude and damn near tore his face off more than once....he called her Bobcat and it stuck.

For 53 years, guys.

She called him Ray, short for Raven, because he was always following her around and mocking her.

Note:  Ravens are scavengers and due follow animals.  They are also known to mimick sounds and are very good at this.

So, that was one thing that stood out to me but I honestly didn't really think about it until it began to grow.

Now, I took it back and Sarah's parents just about killed us and even though I bawled my eyes out....they turned it over to the authorities in the area so it could be nursed back to health.

So anyway, we head back home and I get there and I'm informed that Granny has passed.

Of course, I'm completely heartbroken.

I remember I didn't even really talk for about three days.

I stayed outside, in the tree house for a couple nights until my Uncle just made me go inside.

I just felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest.

So for a while, I stopped living on an earth centric path.

Several years passed and by the time I was about seventeen...things were really bad.

A lot of things happened in that time.

A lot of dark things.

A lot of really damaging things happened to be and I got further and further away from the light.

Eventually, I was very near suicide and apparently everyone could see it.

I wouldn't admit.

There was no way you'd ever get that out of me but it was gonna happen sooner or later.  

A few of my family members and my then boyfriend took me up to the mountains again for about a week.

I mean, honestly, I felt like I was on house arrest.

I couldn't be alone.

Everyone was watching me.

They kept trying to distract or get me to talk.

I was just so sick of it.

So one night I woke up in the middle of night...and just went outside.

Which mind you...is stupid to do in the mountains.

Especially, in that particular area because it's entirely possible to have a mountain lion or a bear out there.

Don't do that.  I was an idiot.

So anyway, I go out in my fucking pajamas with a cigarette and nothing else.... like a nutcase and I'm sitting there on the railing smoking something I managed to bum off this kid at the front desk at the cabin check ins.

And then I hear something.

I look around and I don't see anything...because it's dark and I couldn't be bothered to turn on the light.

Honestly, it's miracle something didn't eat me just to get rid of my stupidity.  

I'm serious.

Well, anyway.

I look over and there sitting on this porch swing...is a bobcat.

Now, I wasn't a total idiot and I did realize that there was a bobcat sitting there on a swing not three feet from me and if I pissed it off....it could easily fuck me up.

So I froze and then tried to back into the cabin.  

I knew that typically they tended to shy away from human and here this one sat on the porch swing close to me and that if it had rabies that could cause erractic behavior.

I also knew that they were super fast and had crazy sharp claws.

So since I didn't favor being turned into shredded chicken any time time...I tried to back again.

Attention:  Do not fucking run from them as it will provoke them to chase you.  Same with mountain lions.  Please for the love of gods, do not fucking run from mountain lions.  You will not win and it will not end well. That sounds savage but I'm just telling you.  

Anyway, I get back into the house and I stop because in what little light there is outside I see a shadow of this fucking bobcat....with half of it's fucking ear missing.

And I just freeze like an idiot.

And then I started crying because I was positive that this was the little kit that I found several years back.

Eventually someone heard me and jerked me back into the house before turning the light on and making enough noise to run it off and wake up everyone else.

I was lectured.

I was hugged close enough that I could feel my lungs squeeze.

I was told that we were going back home.

However, I begged them to stay.

I told them I'd talk.

I'd work through it.

Honestly, it was more than anyone had heard from me in a long time so we stayed.

Pap was with us on that trip and finally I broke down and told him about the bobcat, and the one I'd found...and why I got so emotional about it.

He understood and the next morning I saw him sitting in the swing with coffee in hand...and that bobcat was on the side of the hill, head down on it's paws, just looking at him.

I remember I tried to get his attention to keep him safe but he just told me to come on outside.

I was cautious but I went because I trusted Pap and sat with him.

He looked at the bobcat and looked at me and he said, "You know that's your Granny."

I'll be honest.

It chilled me to the bone because there was no way I was going to say that outloud.

Given everything that had happened to me and my depression...I knew saying that would get me put into a glorified looney bin.

Call it what you will but we all know what it is.

I remember trying to beat around the bush and he called me on it more than once.

He told me that he just knew and that he knew that I knew...because Granny and I always had that connection.

I remember him pointing out the ear.

Now, it's important to know that my Granny was a cancer survivor.  

She had it four times and kept pulling through.

However the last time had caused her to lose a good chunk of her ear because they had to cut it out.

I had honestly forgotten about it at the time because I just didn't see that kind of thing when I looked at Granny.

I remember him telling me how a normal bobcat would've already run off but that that had to be his "Bobcat" because while she was a touch me not...she always wanted the attention.

He also informed me that while my Aunt was trying to load up my suitcases that morning while I was asleep (so that we would have to go home sooner)....the bobcat was sitting on top of the jeep.

I remember him telling me how she was my guardian all my life and that she was my guardian again now.

I remember just breaking down and crying for hours.  

People came out to try and help but Pap just waved them off...and that bobcat stayed there the whole time.

Never moved.

Never did anything.

Guys, I'm sorry if my writing is so broken for this but I get very emotional with this memory.

I'm trying to share things with you because I think it's important to share them but wow, I just really miss her.

Anyway, I'm getting it together.

So, my point is half the family went ahead and went back home and I stayed there in the mountains with Pap, my Uncles for another week.

It was pretty quiet and honestly I felt better than I had in a while.

I stayed in the loft and kept the blinds open.

The bobcat would come back every day and just lay there.

Pap would sit outside and drink coffee and he eventually convinced me start meditating.

I'd do my thing and he'd ask me ever so often if I could mix up something for his psoriasis because it was itching.

I remember telling them that I didn't really remember how to do it anymore but that I had some lotion.

He said nothing being the natural and eventually the guilty got the best of me and I tried my best to make him an oil for it.

I was rusty and it was waaaaaay rough around the edges but he used it anyway.

We actually happened to be there towards the end so that it did actually coincide with a full moon.

Which has less to do with coincidence and more to do with the fact that I ended up in that damn cabin for close to 2 1/2 weeks, lol.

Anyway, it had been a long time since I'd done anything full moon meditation and so I took a minute to do it by sitting in front of the window and closing my eyes.

I prayed.

I focused.

I meditated.

And when I was done and I opened my eyes....there it was again.

It was just laying there until it got up and jumped down on to the porch and up onto the other side of the window.

It stared at me right through the glass and I'll admit to being afraid.

It just stared until it leaned forward and pressed it's head against the glass.

I don't know what possessed me to do it but I just did it too.

And all I could hear was my Granny's voice in my head telling me that she loved me and that it was ok to be sad.

It's your choice to believe me or not because that's not what mattered.

After that, the bobcat just looked at me for a moment and then walked away.

I didn't see it again on that trip after that and then we went back home.

But guys, a few years ago my Pap died and we had his funeral in the mountains because that's where he was from and where his original family was.

So we all went and we got a different cabin so we could stay a week.

I'll be honest, I was really devasted when he died.

The other family that went with us on the trip was my Dad's side of the family.  

Pap just went because he loved and cared about me.

So really Granny and Pap were the only ones on my mother's side of the family who really gave a damn about me...and I just felt so empty again after that.

I remember bawling my eyes out again but doing much better than I had the first time.

I was older now and an adult so I got up and got a cup of coffee.

I went out on the porch with my coffee and my poptart (like a fully functioning adult, lol) and sat on the little bench and when I finally looked up I nearly had a heart attack.

There was a bobcat and a raven on the hill side.

Fear and panic were the first things to course through me because hello, bobcat.

The second was shock because what the fuck?!

And then I noticed that damn ear again and I just started tearing up.

I remember actually whispering 'Granny?' and it just laid down.

And that raven...

Which by the way, this is important.

Raven's are not a popular bird in Tennessee.  This is usually more of a crow territory but there is a specific popular of ravens that migrated into the mountains of east tennessee years ago.  Ok, factoids over, lol.

Anyway, this damn raven just hops up and lands on the railing in front of me...and I'm just sitting there staring at the both of them like I'm looking at Jesus Christ himself.

And I'm just crying because I have no doubt in my mind that that was Granny and Pap.

Bobcat and Raven.

For me, that was magic.

That was the earth and the universe pulling it in.

I don't believe that we ever leave each other.

I don't believe than anything is really ever over.

Have I seen them again since then?

No.

But I like to think that maybe one day when it's my time to go....they welcome me on a walk through the mountains with them.

Thank you for being apart of my little walk down memory lane.

I'm crying again.

Bawling my eyes out actually.

I'm not sad really.

I just miss them and I'm so grateful to have had them in my life.

Thank you, smoochies for listening to me blubber and I hope that sharing my experience with you had helped you.

Much love, all the light and many, many blessings to you.

)0( Kennysaurus )0( Love you forever Bobcat and Raven

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If ya’ll have a specific topic ya’ll want to see discussed on the Witchy Weirdness series just please send it in through the ask box.  Thanks and I love you guys. 

[awkwardshanandagins]

Costco+Lupron=One Very Stabby Shanda

You read that right, STABBY. As in I'm on the brink of stabbing someone or something.  Anyone else ever feel this way? Oh..no?  Are you telling me it's not normal to feel like stabbing someone?  Well, shit, I've been feeling stabby so hard since about 5:00 p.m. yesterday, just in time for my husband to get home.  Lucky him!  I got my sixth and final Lupron injection yesterday and this one stays in my system for three months as opposed to the one month injections I've been getting.  I don't know if you're supposed to feel much of a difference between the two but dear Lord this one has been a doozy!  I have had to try way harder than one should ever have to try to not elbow someone in the face today.  That should just be easy, right?  We don't elbow people in the face, it's not socially acceptable, therefore we do not have to consciously make an effort not to do so, we just don't do it.  Not me.  Not today.  I've had to make a very conscious decision not to elbow several stupid faces.  They're lucky I have some self-control.

At this point, you may be thinking I am a very violent person. As much as I talk about it (and yes, sometimes daydream about it), I would NEVER actually do anything to hurt anyone.  I'm a big ol' pussy and I "care" too much about my fellow man or whatever.  But, if there was ever something strong enough to make me actually throat chop someone, it would be this damn Lupron.  This shit is not for the weak!  I know better than to go out in public the first couple days after my injection but I ignored my better judgement, something I do too often.

I decided to run by Costco on my way home from work.  Going to Costco while practically roid-raging on Lupron is a terrible idea.  Going to Costco in general is usually a terrible idea.  I have such a strong love-hate relationship with Costco.  It is literally my favorite store while also being the place I hate most in this world.  It's not so much the store I despise, but the people inside of it.  There seems to be a common theme with me lately, I just really can't stand people.  Anyways, after spending almost a full week laid up on the couch I figured running some errands would be good for me.  I have to do things while I feel most human and today was one of those days, or so I thought.  Hormonally, I don't think it was my wisest decision.

Parking was the first red flag.  This dickhead woman stole my spot and I about had a total meltdown.  A screaming, crying, ramming my car into the back of hers kind of meltdown.  I think she knew how annoyed I was, one because I stared her down real hard and two because she did not get out of the car until I exited mine and walked inside.  Another spot opened up two spots away and at this point a normal person would have let it go but Lupron said "NO! YOU WILL HATE THIS WOMAN FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY.  SHOW HER YOUR HATRED!" I glared through her window as I got out of my car.  I went as slow as possible so I could see how long she'd stay in there.  Part of me was hoping she'd get out but the other part of me, the more rational part of me, was like "why? what would you do if she did get out?"  I'd give her a good ol' fashion scream cry in the face, that's what I'd do!  I always seem to think if I stare at someone long and hard enough, they'll feel my rage burning into the side of their face and they'll know they did something stupid.  Man, I sure showed her!  In reality, she probably had no idea any of this was even happening.

While walking in, I somehow got behind the slowest couple that has ever existed.  They were barely moving but did an excellent job of taking up the entire entry way so there was no way for me to go around.  They continued their slow, sprawled out moseying the whole way in, pointing and stopping at every single item; again making it nearly impossible to pass them.  My hormone fueled rage did not let me give up however.  I got way too close for comfort, did a few NFL approved spin moves and somehow slipped by.  What I don't understand is how at the end of my shopping trip in hell, I ended up behind them again!  They had to have walked in and straight to the check-out lane.  There is no way, with their speed, that they could have made it anywhere else in the store and still ended up in front of me in the short amount of time it took me to sprint around the place.  Damn them.  Damn them real hard.  Slow walkers are literally the worst.

Next, I ended up right in front of a real fun older gentleman.  He turned out to be a super douchebag, but by the end of our interaction I made sure to really give him the look of hate and shame so he knew how annoyed I was.  To start, he about ran me over with his cart.  I was eating a sample as most of us do during our shopping trips to Costco.  Let's be real, it's pretty much a given that at least 75% of us are there during lunch time to indulge on these samples instead of eating a normal lunch.  Anyways, I do what I do best and accidentally dropped it down the front of me.  It had ranch on it and it spilled all over me and splatted on the floor.  Trying to be a decent human being, I bent over to pick it up and this mother-effer was so close behind me that he had to abruptly pull his cart backwards or he would have knocked me straight onto my face.  I let him go around, loudly said "jeeeeeeeeez," picked up my stuff and walked slowly behind him so he could get way ahead.  I was trying to spare his life.  About three aisles down, all of a sudden I can feel a cart right behind me but before I could turn around, someone threw a giant heavy box of something into it making a huge crash which about made me wet myself.  I turned around and it was the same toolbag who nearly booty bumped me onto my damn face.  At this point, I was beyond annoyed, almost to a place of murder, so I decided to follow very closely behind him so he could feel my wrath glaring a hole into the back of his head.  He walked comically fast, which I take as a compliment because I obviously scared him enough for him to practically run away.

I decided to skip the rest of the samples and leave before I lashed out and hurt someone, or most likely myself.  It was obvious I was in no state of mind to be around other human beings so I made a straight shot for the aisle I needed which luckily was right by the check-out.

You know what people drive me the most crazy?  The ones who act like they take precedence over everyone else on this earth.  Luckily, one of them was right in the main aisle trying samples with her child while her cart sat in the middle of the busiest aisle there is.  It was obvious it was in the way as people were lined up to get around it and were taking turns to pass her.  The polite thing would be to move your cart but no, she just stood there shoving her stupid face with quinoa not giving one shit that she was making it difficult for literally every other person there to get around her.  If anyone were to get a punch to the throat today, it would have been her.  I wanted to slap her quinoa out of her hand and high-kick her cart.  Move your shit, lady!

Whoever is in charge of deciding what items go on which shelves is either incredibly smart or terribly evil, or both I guess.  All I wanted was the protein powder I use for my morning shakes.  It is usually always by the vitamins but you know where they moved it?  On the fucking candy aisle!  Good God, why?  I AM A WEAK PERSON, COSTCO!  They know.  They know we are all weak and if they put the healthy crap by the delicious and unhealthy crap, we will buy both.  What a bunch of assholes.  Smart assholes though.

By the time I got up to the checkout lane, my arms were so full of stuff I did not go there for in the first place, that I was walking with an��awkward limp, attempting to use one of my legs as a weird third arm to try to keep it all from falling.  I was hot and super sweaty at this point, which I'm sure made me look incredibly sane, and the rage had hit an all-time high.  What's worse than a menopausal woman?  A HOT menopausal woman!  A nice man came to my rescue as he clearly saw they had a liability on their hands with me.  I left as quickly as possible and tried not to look at anyone for fear if they gave me the wrong face, I might throw my box of items right at their head.

This was not even one of my worst trips to Costco.  I usually take Paul with me which honestly just makes it all worse.  He is not good in crowds and has a quick temper at times.  We are quite the pair right now!  One of us usually tries to remain level headed to keep the other one from completely losing their mind and rampaging through the store.  He absolutely loathes Costco so I tend to be the one remaining level headed.  Hard to imagine, I know.  The sample areas are breeding grounds for assholes.  It never fails, every time either he or I walk up to grab one, some jerkoff steps in front of us and grabs the last one.  I will wait patiently but Paul will boil over and have to walk away while cursing quietly.  Actually it's not quiet at all.  He does it so loud it usually draws attention.  I try to quickly corral him out of there while telling him to talk quieter which usually leads to us bickering until one of us walks ahead of the other one and remains five steps in front for the rest of the excursion.  It's obvious there is a marital spat taking place at this point.  Any time you see a woman walking five steps in front of a man, you can guarantee a fight just took place.  I really should just leave him at home.  It never turns out well.  Paul can't help but have an angry scowl on his face the entire time.  My family now calls Paul's angry face his "Costco face."

My next stop was PetSmart.  I should have just gone home but why stop there?  Maybe for the safety of myself and others?  Probably, but I live life dangerously.  There was this bird, or possibly baby pterodactyl, inside PetSmart that screeched non-stop the entire time I was there.  Normally, I would be able to block that out but my Lupron brain would not allow me to and instead made it sound like it was inside my skull.  I asked the cashier if the bird did this all the time and he said yes while looking like he had been seriously considering murder.  I would lose my mind working there with that bird.  That damn thing would "mysteriously" disappear one day.  Whoa, calm down, I wouldn't kill it, I'd obviously just let it go.  Right as I walked out of the parking lot, a car alarm continued the screeching's of that fucking bird.  Again, it usually wouldn't bother me but since it was happening inside my skull, I seriously considered running inside and screaming similar sounds until someone shut the stupid thing off.  Instead, I got in my car and drove my ass home.  I will hide out here until the effects of Satan's saliva wears off and I am a more normal, functioning person.

I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I am that this will be my last shot!  This stuff is no joke.  It honestly has been both a blessing and a curse.  I truly do think it's made me feel better in many aspects but it has also made me into a complete lunatic.  Seriously, if my marriage can withstand this, it can withstand anything!

To those who are considering this medication, please do not let my stories turn you away from it.  The side effects I've had really have not been anything compared to the constant pain and bleeding us girls/women with endometriosis suffer from.  I've heard people have both amazing and terrible experiences with it.  I really urge you to think for yourself on this one and not take others' experiences into account since each one of us reacts so differently to this drug.  If you do decide to take it, good luck and God speed!  I joke.  Seriously though, I am here to listen to you throughout your own Lupron journey if you just need someone to vent to.  It helps having someone to talk to who completely gets it.  If you decide to give Lupron a try, just a word of advice...DON'T GO TO COSTCO!

[demigodofhoolemere]

Liken the Scriptures

Something I'm completely in love with and I always ask other Mormons if they've ever seen them: Liken the Scriptures. Now having been more involved with the LDS community on this site and realizing that I haven't talked about it nearly enough, I thought it high time to make a post about it and shamelessly promote my favorite thing in the world.

Liken is a movie series of scripture stories (from both the Book of Mormon and the Bible) imagined as musicals. The premise is that in the modern day, there is a child who is facing a difficult challenge in their life, and they are told stories from the scriptures that relate in some way and the child can use the lesson they've learned from the story and apply it in their lives. When told these stories, the child will imagine it in their minds, everything set up like a play with songs and all, so that they can really get a feel for the story and put themselves into the shoes of the people who lived it.

I have found many times over that these little movies have helped me to remember the stories better than I ever could on my own, and give me a serious appreciation for the real thing. They’re not only educational, but incredibly fun and truly wholesome entertainment, with lots of comedy gags that are a grab-bag of scripture references and hilarious anachronisms (my personal favorite is the sundial watch that appears in all of them). It’s serious when it needs to be and funny when it can be. One minute you have an upbeat and fun number and the next minute the jokes are turned off like a switch and suddenly you're feeling the Spirit strongly, or vice versa, and the transition is so natural and organic. The songs are so well done, the acting is so powerful, there are completely brilliant musical motifs and overtures, the sets and costumes are somewhat cheesy and are clearly church budget but in the best and most fun possible way. The messages are moving and they stay with you.

This is already long, so I'm going to talk about great things from each of them under the cut.

~~~~~

Nephi & Laban (2003)

- a primary classroom that I feel like I've been in before

- the “imaginer child” somehow manages to continually break his imagination’s fourth wall and talk to Nephi

- Nephi (about Laman and Lemuel): “🎶 The older ones play games that I don't always like to play🎶” Lemuel in the background: “Let’s beat Nephi with a rod!”

- Laman is played by Ice from Hocus Pocus

- the song where the brothers are drawing lots is a literal boyband number and I honestly have no words for that experience

- Laban sings a lot about how much he loves his possessions, Zoram is just going with it and the guards are exhausted with their boss

- there’s an incredibly moving number involving Sariah praying to God for comfort, and honestly the raw emotion emanating from her as she cries to Heavenly Father is so powerful and so relatable and it makes me cry with her

- the best method ever of avoiding showing somebody get killed

- a gorgeous closing number that includes the repented Laman and Lemuel but also foreshadows their future by having them not sing the line “I’ll follow thee through all my days” with their brothers

Ammon & King Lamoni (2004)

- Abish is a significant central character and is treated as a scripture hero in her own right, and gets her own incredibly inspiring song about sharing the gospel that has always really resonated with me

- Lamoni is awesome, his servants are great, the queen is amazing (sadly there is no ‘to me he doth not stink’, but her very presence in general makes up for it)

- subtle acknowledgement of Ammon’s past with the sons of Mosiah

- Ammon has a lovely song about the blessings of missionary work and spreading God’s word. During this song he has a picnic with a bear, teaches it the gospel, and gives it a bottle of honey as a thank you for its time. I couldn't make this up if I tried.

- after Lamoni orders his servants to watch the sheep, the servants have a hilariously pessimistic song where they're bemoaning their upcoming deaths, and instead of showing Ammon chop off arms we’re treated to the servants coming back with an upbeat and lively song celebrating the fact that they're alive, and they retell to Lamoni the story of everything that happened. The sequence is incredibly clever and the choreography is the BEST.

- a deep and thoughtful number about Lamoni reconsidering his entire life

- something I really like about this one is that unlike the others, this time it's not the imaginer child who personally needed to hear the story but actually the person telling it

David & Goliath (2005)

(There are 2 versions of this because they re-shot the modern day portion to use a different imaginer child. The one that gets sold with the set is the second version but the first one is still out there if you look for it and personally that's the one that I get more emotional about.)

- Goliath is played by Thurl Bailey and David’s brother Abinadab is played by Alex Boyé which is really all you need to know. Thurl uses a club as a microphone while he sings about murdering the Israelites. This whole thing is gold.

- honestly all of David’s brothers are such characters, they're great. There’s a song where they’re all arguing like children over which one of them is going to be king, and there's another where they’re meeting Samuel and their father keeps trying to promote each of them and after each of them is rejected he continues to claim that the next one in line is his favorite, and when David is chosen he acts like he knew it all along even though they didn't bring him in the first place

- David has a couple of different numbers about the Lord seeing what's inside of you and using you for good things even if you feel so small

- Saul has a complete mental breakdown which results in the best song I've ever heard in my life

- there’s a very reverent sense of companionship between David and Saul, and they have an absolutely gorgeous duet where Saul reminisces about how he used to have the kind of faith and goodness that David does, and David assures him that it's never too late to let God touch your heart

- the Philistines are completely wild and ridiculously over-the-top and their crazy outfits range from Rastafarian to Rod Stewart and their weapons are all completely made up and it makes no sense and I love it

- David: “🎶 and he will soon be 6 feet deep, I’m giving you my oath 🎶” Saul: “But suppose he were 6 feet deep, why, he'd still be 3 and a half feet tall!”

- a servant uses finger guns

- “I Am David” makes me feel like I can do anything

- Saul’s future is foreshadowed by him looking super confused and uncomfortable about David getting the kingdom’s praise

Alma & King Noah’s Court (2005)

- Noah’s courtroom comes complete with animatronic jaguars

- Noah is insanely high-maintenance and his kingdom is some sort of wild media circus and one of the priests reminds me of my uncle as a rockstar

- within the child’s imagination Alma himself also imagines a few things and has to snap out of it so there’s some imagination-ception going on here

- throughout the whole movie Alma is so earnest and genuine and it's so sweet

- Abinadi makes me cry like a baby every single time

- I kid you not, Noah and the priests have a disco number. There is a straight-up disco number in the middle of the courtroom. I can't even begin to explain.

- Seriously though. Abinadi. He ruins me. I always cry. I'm crying right now.

- Alma ruins me, too.

- Honestly the theme of conversion and baptism in this one just gets to me (I suppose it does with Ammon as well but for whatever reason Alma is different). I've been raised in the church myself, but my mother and my paternal grandmother are converts, some good friends in my stake were converted, and I've been blessed to be able to see our closest family friends come to believe the gospel and get baptized, and sharing the light of Christ with others is such an important thing to me that I can never come out of this one with dry eyes.

The First Christmas (2006)

- all of the shepherds are super cheery and optimistic except for just one who's very bored and very tired

- Zacharias and Elisabeth tug at my heartstrings in the worst way

- the angel Gabriel is the absolute best in every way

- any scene with Mary in it is so beautifully powerful, her songs even more so

- there's a scene with the Biblical era equivalent of nosy relief society sisters and it’s great

- honestly there are so many powerful scenes in this one, you've got Mary and Joseph looking for a place to stay and you've got a choir of angels giving glory to God and you've got the shepherds celebrating the birth of Christ and you've got the manger scene and... chills the whole way through

- gloomy shepherd: “Nothing ever happens out here, I mean nothing!” *brightly glowing Gabriel appears half a second later*

- if you've ever heard BYU Vocal Point sing ‘He’s Born’, this is where that song comes from

Esther & the King (2006)

- My favorite. My absolute favorite. There are no words that can convey my love for this movie. Stick my DVD copy with me in my coffin when I go.

- All of the songs are so catchy and amazing and I love each and every one of them with all my heart.

- The maidens waiting to meet the king all do the most ridiculous and flashy things to try and impress him and Esther’s just like ‘um...ok...’ and Hegai has the best reaction faces ever to grace this planet

- Teresh and Bigthan are so weird and a little crazy and I love it. They're like if Timon and Pumbaa were villains.

- what I love even more is Haman, oh my word, he's so vain and childishly absurd but also somehow manages to be truly menacing and awful and it's incredible

- Esther’s relationships with Mordecai and Ahasuerus are perfect and so sweet and all of them individually are such good people

- her songs are so breathtaking and strong and she's my hero and I love her

- Haman has the best villain songs in the history of villain songs. I will never ever tire of them.

- wonderful use is made of the chamberlain with the unfortunate name of Carcas

- there's a song for the part where Haman keeps giving hilariously specific suggestions for gifts that he thinks are for himself and then he goes to cry to his wife when he has to do all of it for Mordecai

- early on Esther has a song asking the king if he can love her for who she is and in the end it gets so beautifully flipped on its head and he's the one very humbly asking her if she can love him and it's the sweetest thing

- the word ‘news’ in the closing number “There Is News Today” is subtly but clearly pronounced like ‘noose’ because Haman’s about to be hanged and it's amusing in a weirdly morbid way

Samuel the Lamanite (2006)

- the imaginer child has been doing this for so long that her imagination process is evolving and now she sees herself physically partaking in the story and interacting with the citizens of Zarahemla and at one point the storyteller goes ‘can you imagine how it must have felt to be a believer in a time such as this?’ and her eyes are wide as she nods her head in fear like ‘yes I'm living it right now and I want out’

- the wicked people in the city sing about how great they are and while doing this they are continually casually awful to the people around them

- there’s this narcissistic archery corps who have the run of the place for some reason

- Nephi II and Nephi III are super sweet

- there are wonderful songs about never being alone because God is within and He shares His love

- Samuel looks very accurate to that figurine

- someone throws a rock at Samuel but it bounces off the wall and comes right back to hit the guy in the face

- the bad guys have a song about how it's been 5 years and nothing Samuel prophesied has happened, and for whatever amazing reason it's a mariachi number and the screen transitions into sepia and they have a piñata that looks like Samuel but they can't hit it no matter what they do

- interestingly, even though this one is filled with a lot of funnies, it's also the most dramatic because the villains become completely ruthless and the believers are literally almost murdered

Daniel & the Lions (2006)

- Darius is overstressed by his job and Daniel has basically become his therapist. Darius has a jazz number about his stress and how he needs help.

- Daniel is so calm and sweet and always has the best advice to offer. His relationship with Darius is very brotherly and loving, and he deals with the men who want him dead with such grace and patience.

- the king’s messenger (to a noisy crowd): “Put a sock in it!” villager #1: *whispers* “What’s a sock?” villager #2: *shrugs*

- Daniel only buys fruit and vegetables from the marketplace in reference to earlier in the book of Daniel where he refuses meat

- There are 3 main bad guys who go after Daniel, and the leader of the band is properly creepy. They also have a fully choreographed number about spying on Daniel while he's literally like 5 feet in front of them and he keeps looking back at them awkwardly, and later they literally have a Beach Boys number in the middle of the throne room and it's the best thing that's ever happened to me

- Darius’s heart is absolutely broken when he realizes that by law Daniel has to be sent into the den and it’s so gorgeous

- when Daniel is taken away the bad guys become very dramatic and act like they've made so many sacrifices for this victory and they're waving around red flags and it's somehow amusing but darkly disturbing at the same time

- Daniel and Darius have an incredibly powerful duet about the Spirit offering peace in times of need and it makes me cry

- the lions are played by people in costume and Daniel can talk to them

- Instead of just making them peaceful or causing them to lose their appetites, the angel turns the lions into vegetarians. They suddenly have a lively number about how excited they are to be vegetarians now. Vegetarian lions. I couldn't make this stuff up. It’s golden.

Jonah & the Great Fish (2011)

- Jonah is played by David Osmond

- I still love this one but personally I don't feel it's quite as good as the others, which has everything to do with the underwater sequences. The ‘great fish’ is given a name and a life story and he has a fish friend who follows him everywhere and for some reason they're given a large amount of screentime. I still kind of like them, but I’m sure I would like them better under different circumstances. It feels very weird and out of place here. The imaginer child and her storyteller even talk about them like they’re real characters. There are also villainous sharks for some reason. The only thing that makes sense about anything that happens underwater is the sequence when Jonah is inside the fish. I don't want to seem like I'm bashing the movie because I don't mean to, I definitely still adore it and I would still recommend it. There’s just stuff that doesn't make sense.

- The way they portray the contentions in Nineveh is to have the city be divided into the Left Siders and the Right Siders, and they all wear a glove on the respective hand and wear different color schemes. The architecture is different on both sides and even all of the names begin with L or R. Everyone is very unnecessarily dramatic about staying on their sides of the dividing line and there's an awesome musical number about how much they all hate each other and how important it is to pick a side. This clearly happens a lot because the king and queen are very tired of having to break up fights and after everyone has cleared out they have a beautiful duet about their hopes that God can help their people.

- Jonah has a great song where he's pledging himself to God and promising to go wherever he is asked, and then he's told to go to Nineveh and he goes, “EXCEPT THERE!” and suddenly the entire song backtracks and takes on a feeling of panic as he packs up all of his things and sings about running as far away as possible

- the mariners that Jonah hitches a ride with take advantage of how desperate he is to run away and they scam him out of almost all of his money, also the captain has a mullet

- when thrown overboard: “So this is how the story of Jonah ends, huh? Prematurely, in the first chapter. I think about verse 15...”

- Jonah has a beautiful repentance song when he's inside the fish, and the entire ending where Jonah is in Nineveh is really well done and the closing number is very uplifting and moving.

~~~~~

Really though, I highly recommend Liken to anybody. I can't do these movies enough justice, they’re amazing. I put them on whenever I'm feeling bad, they just have a way of healing your heart and uplifting your spirit. They’re a wonderful reminder of how present our Heavenly Father is in our lives.

[pinupgalore-lanadelrey]

“Yeah, I did it. Why not? Look, I do a lot of shit.”  Lana when asked if she did witchcraft against Donald Trump You have tweeted magical recipes to get rid of Trump… ‘It was a joke. I read how witches of the entire world tried to federate at these dates and times to put a spell on Trump, I just relayed.” “I guess I was alluding to the fact that I just hope nothing really crazy happens (during his Presidency)."It was a binding spell against chaos. I guess it could be working because it could be more chaotic than right now… although it’s hard to imagine that.”

“I feel like this election jolted almost everyone who was floating around, feeling weird, whatever… right into the current moment,” Del Rey says. “I know several people that had a sort of drifter mentality that are now in the thick of it, considering things, and considering their own contributions, and what matters. I’ve known what matters to me for a long time, so I was already kind of there, but I didn’t really see it going this negatively. I feel like we’re in a bit of a Hitchcockian experience, and you’re in a scenario, and every day you wake up and you can’t believe the things being said and done are real. And I think some people are questioning if this shit is actually happening, like especially with the North Korea issues, which are really the scariest because you’re talking about nuclear annihilation.” 

“Coachella - Woodstock in My Mind” I wrote on my way home from Coachella when things were getting hostile between North Korea and the U.S., and all those failed missile launches, which happened the day after the first night of the festival. I feel lucky to be able to speak my mind through music right in the present moment.”

“Around me, in the artistic milieu, we all share the same feeling of uncertainty, of fear, and the talk which arises. Women the subject of this song, are the most affected, the most referred to by the arrival of Trump. I have written this song prior to the big marches which seemed inevitable to happen. This rhetorical hate is not dignified for a head of state. The day after the elections was one of the hardest days in my life. I went to the studio nonetheless, to talk to the others. I want to be informed by reading everything, and see if I can get anything at all. Unfortunately, I can’t find anything that convinces me.“

“Well, I have a song that’s quite aware about the collective worry, about whether this is the end of an era. It’s called “When the world was at war we kept dancing.” But I actually went back and forth about keeping it on the record, because I didn’t want it there if it would make people feel worse instead of better. It’s not apathetic. The tone of the production is very dark, and doesn’t lead to a fucking happy feeling. And the question it poses: Is this the end of America, of an era? Are we running out of time with this person at the helm of a ship? Will it crash? In my mind, the lyrics were a reminder not to shut down or shut off, or just don’t talk about things. It was more like stay vigilant and keep dancing. Stay awake.”

“I have a couple of songs, like “God Bless America,” and another song called, “When the World Was at War We Just Kept Dancing,” which is about what we’ve been talking about: trying to stay positive, and just believing that things are going to be okay. And if it feels like they’re not going to be okay, we’ll try and make them okay individually and then together.” 

Accordingly, you have my personal favorite track on the record, “God Bless America,” an unbridled spanker of a song that’s title refrain is followed by, “And all the beautiful women in it”—that’s instantly echoing through your melon and one in which Del Rey remarks, “Yeah, I went there.” She describes the song, of which Mawson shared earlier his reluctance to release as a single, given the tendency of Del Rey to net the mentioned public polarization, “It has some strong messaging,” she says nodding. “Some iconography, with Lady Liberty, fire escapes and the streets, and I do get a little New York feel when I listen back to it.” I tell her the song feels grandiose in production, anthemic in verse… very New York in fact, a sparkling pile of empire and accomplishment. And while New York (and its banks) have churned out the free world leader and a boys club not so concerned about everyone therein being blessed, moreover the “beautiful women in it”—reminding us that grandiosity has its pitfalls—“God Bless America” could easily ascend the ladder as a 2017 rally cry.

I ask her if she feels the appropriative nature of the song title may stir any pots of sorts.”Well, it’s the God word,” she says measuredly. “But the phrase has wider meaning. It’s more of a sentiment. When I wrote it I didn’t feel like it was confined to a traditional portrait of the Lord, as some sects might see it. It was more like, ‘Fucking God bless us all and let’s hope we make it through this.’ She further explains the genesis, “When all the Women’s Marches were happening, I had already written this song, because I had been hearing a lot of things online. And I have a sister, and a lot of girlfriends, who had a lot of concerns about things that were being said in the media by some of our leaders. And I saw an instant reaction from women, and I was like, ‘Wow. There is no confusing how women are feeling about the state of the nation.’ And so without really trying to, I felt compelled to just write a song and say we are all concerned. And it really made me think about my relationship with women. And I felt proud of myself, because I do love the women in my life. And I take care of them, and I ask them what they think about music, and guys, and problems. With this, I was right there with everyone.”

“I wrote “God Bless America” [a track on the album] before the Women’s Marches, but I could tell they were going to happen… I realized a lot of women were nervous about some of the bills that might get passed that would directly affect them. So yes, it’s a direct response in anticipation of what I thought would happen, and what did happen.” 

“When there were the women’s marches, I was writing about that. There was enough space in my mind to really absorb everything. Regardless of where someone is at personally, the current landscape jolts you into being present, if you’re not crazy. If you’re a normal person, you’re suddenly aware and watching everything.   It’s a very different time for everybody. Because there is something new every day that you read and you’re like, Oh my God, is that real?”

 Just a few years ago you were saying you didn’t care about feminism, and now you are writing protest songs and meditations on war and peace. “Because things have shifted culturally. It’s more appropriate now than under the Obama administration, where at least everyone I knew felt safe. It was a good time. We were on the up-and-up.Women started to feel less safe under this administration instantly. What if they take away Planned Parenthood? What if we can’t get birth control? Now, when people ask me those questions, I feel a little differently. The reason why I asked Stevie Nicks to be on the record is because she changes when her environment changes, and I’m like that as well.In “When the World Was at War We Kept Dancing,” I wrote, “Boys, don’t make too much noise/Don’t try to be funny/Other people may not be understanding.” Like, Can you tone down your over-boisterous rhetoric that isn’t working? “God Bless America - And All the Beautiful Women in It” is a little shoutout to the women and anyone else who doesn’t always feel safe walking down the street late at night. That’s what I was thinking of when I wrote, “Even when I’m alone I’m not lonely/I feel your arms around me.” It’s not always how I feel when I’m walking down the street, but sometimes in my music I try to write about a place that I’m going to get to”.

Do you feel unsafe? “I feel less safe than I did when Obama was president. When you have a leader at the top of the pyramid who is casually being loud and funny about things like that, it’s brought up character defects in people who already have the propensity to be violent towards women. I saw it right away in L.A. Walking down the street, people would just say things to you that I had never heard.When people asked me the feminist question before, I was like, “I’m not really experiencing personal discrimination as a woman. I feel like I’m doing well. I headline shows just like the Weeknd does. I got tons of women in my life, love women, support women.” I just felt like, Why don’t we talk about the music first? I can tell you that what I have done for women is tell my own story, and that’s all anyone can do.”

Is it harder to be romantic about America when Trump is the nation’s biggest celebrity? “It’s certainly uncomfortable. I definitely changed my visuals on my tour videos. I’m not going to have the American flag waving while I’m singing “Born to Die.” It’s not going to happen. I’d rather have static. It’s a transitional period, and I’m super aware of that. I think it would be inappropriate to be in France with an American flag. It would feel weird to me now—it didn’t feel weird in 2013.All the guys in the studio—we didn’t know we were going to start walking in every day and talking about what was going on. We hadn’t ever done that before, but everyday during the election, you’d wake up and some new horrible thing was happening. Korea, with missiles suddenly being pointed at the western coast. With “When the World Was at War We Kept Dancing,” I was posing a real question to myself: Could this be the end of an era? The fall of Rome?”

When we sit down to chat, she reveals those same concerns stopped her attending the women’s marches in Los Angeles, earlier this year. “I drove my sister and her girlfriends to the marches,” she says. “I thought about joining in but I felt, like, not really sure how it would go. "I didn’t really want to be a distraction to that group of 10 girls who were going. I wanted them to think about the actual march and not about me standing right next to them.” But, the star is making her contribution in other ways. A new song, God Bless America And All The Beautiful Women In It, is an ode to womankind (“may you stand proud and strong”); while Coachella - Woodstock In My Mind, mines the contradictions of dancing at a festival “whilst watching tensions with North Korea mount”.

It’s a new dimension for Del Rey’s lyrics - which have traditionally concerned themselves with “looking for love in all the wrong places”. “I kind of got jolted into the real world again,” she says. “Just being in California, it’s such a liberal state, I was bombarded with the news every day. So my studio became like a think tank — during the elections it was a constant conversation with my producer and engineers and assistant engineers. "And then obviously during Coachella, that news broke about North Korea and pointing missiles at each other. That was a bit of a rude awakening.”

“I couldn’t ignore what was going on,” she says. “I didn’t really know the UK would have its own upheaval and confusion right at the same time. I was like, ‘What the f***?’ So were my friends. We were waking up early in the morning and calling each other to say, ‘Did you see that? Then in the studio we noticed we hadn’t been able to stop talking about politics. Then we stopped trying to not talk about it and let the record become about that.”

Int: The song ‘Is it the End of America’ is very political… LDR: It is a comment on the current cultural change in the US. It’s been a year and a half since people started to ask during dinners ‘should we move to France?’

Int: You seem more concerned about the defense of women’s rights… LDR: There were inappropriate things said in the white house, it made people uncomfortable. It was also about the question of closing Planned Parenthood. My friends are single women with kids. They have partners but they have to support themselves. And these organizations are very important for them.

@lanadelrey: Climate change is real my friends. Our future children and our future children’s children’s well-being depends on acknowledging that scientists need to be supported and heard. There’s still so much to learn, but aside from that- we don’t want to go backwards from where we are today and deny facts that we already know to be true.  An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, but if you wait for too long then no amount help will be able to change irreparable damage done. (Fact) A march for science is completely unprecedented especially now when we’ve made such leaps and bounds over the last 20 years. But that being said no one has ever doubted that we need to continue our advancement health and environmental research until recently. I don’t know how important the truth is to you… But to me it matters the most. That’s why science is so cool, because the facts are real whether you believe them or not- and that’s what makes it the most important thing in the world to support-because it will continue to give us the answers we seek and the extra time we want.

‘God Bless America - And All the Beautiful Women In It’  Lana says: “That is a great symbol of a song that is just about what the title says. At the time, I was thinking about the US where women were so vocal online and my friends in person. This was before the Women’s Marches and when there was some rhetoric being thrown around that everyone was uncomfortable with. What if they took away Planned Parenthood and birth control and shut down clinics? What are women supposed to do? So before the women’s marches started, I wrote that song very quickly and Rick loved it. It has really cool earth-tone keyboards on there. It feels like a good grounded song.”

When quizzed in the past about her views on feminism, Lana has not been keen to discuss it. She doesn’t like labels or being labelled as anything. Today she says: “In my life I’ve got a sister and surrogate sisters. Things like that. Women have always been such a big part of my life. We were always just friends, there was never much need to rally. If there ever was a time, it really does feel like now and people are doing that.” Lana, 32, adds: “When I was in my early and mid-twenties, I didn’t really know what place I was going to go to as a woman. I don’t know if I’m going to get married. You’re still figuring things out. When I was younger in school, the word ‘feminism’ wasn’t really used. But it was a very important word for my mother’s generation. It’s a way more relevant question in the last eight months than it was five years ago. Honestly, now it’s my pleasure to talk about it. It feels more of a question that is relevant rather than something that could be used as a grenade against me, which sometimes I am willing to sacrifice just to annoy someone.Not you! There have been people in the past where I have been like, ‘F*** you!’”

[timeladyjamie]

The Winchester Sister Tales - Tale 6: Oh my God - Part 1

Jayne Winchester is the daughter of Mary and John Winchester, Sister to Dean, Sam and Adam, Vessel to Gabriel the archangel and The Slayer to the demons. A girl with a lot on her plate, these are her tales of the crazy life she lives. These are 'The Winchester Sister Tales' as written and told by Chuck himself! Published by me.

A/N: Since the season 11 episodes happened, Chuck has decided for a new tale to be from episode 20 in Season 11 to the last episode in season 11. Btw if you haven't noticed these tales are not in order and that's for a reason.

WARNING SPOILERS FOR SEASON 11! READ IF YOU DARE!

The Winchester Sister Tales

Tale 6:Oh my God

It happened with the snap of a finger, quite literally. Jayne was with her brothers hunting and trying to stop the Darkness they unleashed and the next she was in an empty bar.

"It's you, the Winchester sister! But how did we end up here?" She was shocked to see Metatron of all people, or ex angels here.

She quickly ran towards him, going into defense mode and saw a dog on the counter. "Okay, what's going on?"

Jayne looks to see a man sitting in a booth and walks towards him. "Hello?" She notices it is Chuck Shurley, her best friend who was the prophet who went missing. She blinks her wide eyes in disbelief.

Chuck waves at her a little nervously.

Metatron looks at him. "Carver Edlund?"

Chuck takes out his glasses and puts them on. He looks to the Winchester sister seeing her deep in thought. Struggling between wanting to either slap him or hug him. She was trying to put the pieces together, wondering who sent them and why Chuck of all people was here too.

"What the hell is going on here? What is this place?" Metatron asked.

"It's a bar. Actually-." Chuck was cut off by Metatron.

"It's not just a bar, genius. This is one of the Big Man's constructs. I'd know His work anywhere. We were besties, you know."

Chuck looked up to Jayne then to Metatron. "Well, I wouldn't exactly say—"

Metatron sighed and carried on. "This is some kind of punishment, isn't it? For my sins. A limbo where I get to spend eternity in a crappy bar with a hack writer."

Chuck gave an offended look. "Dude—"

Jayne looked top Metatron with narrowed eyes for offending her friend, even if she was a bit mad at him herself. "What did you say about him?"

"Sorry, Chuckles and Slayer. Not just any hack writer – a Prophet of The Lord. Give me a break." Metatron rolled his eyes and began to walk away.

This was when Jayne and Chuck made eye contact again. She looked to him with arms crossed and he returned a nervous look. "There is something more to this. I know it."

He looked hesitant to tell.

"Tell me, at least, the beer is real in here." Metatron commented going to get a glass of beer.

Chuck then turned to Metatron. "You really think I'm a hack?"

Metatron walks back over to them, sitting down in the booth while Jayne stands by the end of the table. "I have trudged through your complete oeuvre. – published and unpublished. Of the metric ton of books I've read in my lifetime, Supernatural didn't even crack the top ten... thousand. Respectfully."

"You didn't like any of it?"

Metatron shook his head.

"Not even Home?"

"No."

"Or All Hell Breaks Loose?"

Metatron gave a disgusted face. "Ugh! Way too much melodrama. And then you put yourself in the story? God!"

Chuck gave a chuckle. "Okay. That's fair. Mildly constructive. Still, It doesn't justify you... burning one of my books though."

The ex angel looked confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Tall Tales. You were monologuing to Castiel and you threw one in the fire." Chuck shruged.

"How do you know about that?" Metatron asked, surprised.

Chuck gave another chuckle. "Oh! I'm sorry. I always forget. People can't see me unless I want them to see me." This was when Jayne looked to him with wide eyes, starting to piece it altogether. He took out sunglasses for Metatron and Jayne to put on. "Here visual aid. Put these on. It will help."

Metatron looks to Jayne confused, but notices her wide eyes. "Go on, just do it. It's a whole thing." Chuck told him as he finally put them on.

Chuck points upward and down as if he flipped a switch. He suddenly glows and Metatron stares at him with shock and amazement. Jayne looks at the best friend she thought she knew as the prophet was much more.

Metatron whispers "You...God."

Jayne looks to him with a smile, overjoyed. "Oh my god!"

Metatron gasps and kneels before Chuck, making the sign of the cross. "God. You've come back. I can't believe you've come back! I-I didn't mean what I'd said about Supernatural! It's underrated— due for a reboot! And this bar, it's not crappy at all! It looks just like the one in Cheers! Everybody knows my name! And the lights are very forgiving!"

Chuck stops glowing and helps Metatron up. "Okay, yeah, please. All the kneeling and stuff, it's always made me deeply, deeply uncomfortable. Just don't use the G-word okay? Just-Just call me Chuck."

Jayne takes off the sunglasses, looking to him wide eyed and tears streaming down her face. Its him, she couldn't believe her best friend all this time was God himself. He was always watching over them after all. It made her overjoyed to tell her brothers, especially that she met the amazing God. But wait- why did he disappear after the apocolypse then? She knew God had a reason for everything and maybe left because it was averted.

Chuck could read her thoughts and wanted to say something but Metatron asked him a question. "Chuck?"

"Chuck."

Metatron took off his sunglasses. "I think I need a stiffer drink." He walks away uncomfortably leaving them alone.

Chuck sighed and looked to the Winchester sister who was flustered with emotions. "Jayne, first off-" Suddenly he was slapped by her. Not too hard, but not too light.

He wasn't shocked by this as he was expecting it and then found himself being taken into a hug. Jayne began to sob uncontrolably into his shoulder. He looked to Metatron who gave a shocked look over her slapping God himself. The slayer truly had guts and he knew it. Chuck comforted her though, understanding the emotions she was going through. He patted her back warmly and let her cry.

"Jayne...shhhh...it's ok."

The winchester sister pulled back to look up at him. "I was worried about you when you disappeared. My best friend had gone during the apocolypse and I didn't know what to think. Where you dead? Kidnapped? I didn't know. And then when Kevin was called in as a prophet...it was like my worst thoughts come to life. You were dead." She wiped her tears, still sobbing a bit. She then punched his chest, careful not to have her slayer strength knock him too hard. "Even if you are God and almighty and have a plan, it still hurt to have my best friend disappear without a goodbye or anything."

He nodded understanding. "I'm sorry, You're right. I would have told you but- the moment wasn't right."

Metatron was watching this from the bar with his mouth wide open. They were acting like a couple. Sure, they were best friends but it felt like there was something more to them in the way they were acting with each other. He was just looking into things too much.

Jayne nodded, trying to put a smile on her face. "Yeah, the moment wasn't right. So that's why you brought me and Metatron here, because now the moment is right." She sighed and began to calm down. "I- uh- I need some tea. Do you have any here?" She wasn't one for drinking alcohol.

Chuck snapped his fingers and a cup of tea appeared before the slayer on the table. "Of course." She mumbled to herself not surprised.

They all sat in silence for a while, gathering their thoughts, mostly Jayne. Of course she always thought of God as her best friend and like a father in a way, but during his time as Chuck on Earth he was quite literally her best friend and by her side. She was just trying to process this.

"Well...not many can say this and mean it, but God is my best friend." She began to chuckle, finding comfort in knowing the truth.

Chuck joined in with her and nodded, getting up to follow Jayne as they walked over to join Metatron at the bar.

"So, what you been up to?" Metatron asked as Chuck poured him a glass of whiskey.

"Oh, I've been super busy. Yeah, I traveled."

"Mmm-hmm"

"I started a blog. Mostly just pictures of cats."

"Oh."

"They're so cute." They all chuckled.

"I can't believe you of all people, or mighty beings have a blog about cats." Jayne giggled at this.

Chuck shurged and continued. "And uh, Oh, I signed up for Snapchat. A-And I started a new series of books. Yeah. Revolution." He paused giving a contemplating look. "But, I don't think it's going anywhere."

"Revolution?" Metatron asked.

"Yeah."

"Supernatural?"

Chuck nodded at this.

Metatron laughed a bit. "Maybe titles aren't your thing."

"You're not wrong." Chuck replied.

Metatron covers his face with his hands then turns to him. "Why did you put on the Chuck suit in the first place? How did that make any sense to you?"

Jayne nodded to the ex angel. "Yeah, good question."

Chuck crossed his arms and began to explain. "I like front row seats. You know, I figured I'd hide out in plain sight. You know, plus, you know, acting is fun."

Metatron shrugged in agreement and Jayne nodded. The mighty Chuck walked back over to his booth where his laptop was, the others following after him. "Well... it's an Oscar-worthy performance. But... how did nobody know? I mean, wh-what about that amulet thingy? Y-You told me about it, some... silly charm that burned brightly in the presence of you?"

Jayne perked up and spoke. "Oh, you mean Dean's necklace? Yeah, Castiel tried to use it to find you...but no luck. I told them it wouldn't work if you didn't want to be found, but they gave up hope to easily."

"Well I've got it." Chuck said, holding the amulet up. "Your brother threw it away."

Metatron pointed to it. "Yes! Dean had it! And your fav— Castiel. They were around you. How did it never—"

"Jayne was right. I turned it off. See?" Chuck moved his fingers up like turning on a light switch and the amulet began to shine brightly. Metatron shielded his eyes from the bright light as Jayne smiled brightly along with it. She knew it!

"I should really put this away." Chuck said, putting the amulet away and chuckling. "You'll never guess where this thing has been this entire time."

Metatron sighed, clearly a bit annoyed with the way he was acting. "Look, I don't care about that ugly, old thing or why you were slumming it with the plebes. Let's brass some tacks already, okay?"

The mighty Chuck crossed his arms and patiently awaited Metatron's questions.

The ex angel began to have a guilty look come over his face. "You see and hear all. You know what an absolute piece of garbage I've been the last couple of years." Chuck closed his eyes and sighed, implying he knows all about Metatron's actions. "Did you bring me here to destroy me?" Metatron asked.

Jayne watched intently, awaiting to see how he would reply. She believed he wouldn't do such a thing, maybe give him a punishment, but never destroy.

"You know what humanity's greatest creation has been?" Chuck suddenly asked. Jayne shrugged at this while he got up from the booth, walking over to a stool on the stage with a guitar. "Music. That and nacho cheese. Even I couldn't have dreamt up that deliciousness. But music... is magic. A lot of remarkable music was created in this space. B.G.'s Canteen. Now, it's not as well known as The Bitter End or The Gaslight, but some amazing musicians got their start on this stage. I'm hoping that you and I can tap into some of that old magic and finish what I started a few months ago."

He pointed to the table causing the slayer and ex angel to turn and see a manuscript labeled "GOD. AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY." Jayne picked it up while her and Metatron looked surprised then looked back to Chuck.

"You wrote your autobiography." Metatron said.

"Ish. I mean, there are chapters, it's kind of a loose structure, uh, but, I don't know, something's missing. I'm—I'm stuck." Chuck said, fixing strings on the guitar.

Metatron put the script back on the table while Jayne picked it up, looking at it in awe. She could read about God's life from his own words. Exactly like the Bible. She took it with her, walking over to the others.

"You want to get the old band back together. Lennon and McCartney ride again." Metatron chuckled to him happily.

"Well, I'm kind of Lennon and McCartney, so... but every writer needs a good editor. I did some of my best work with you, Metatron. And every writer needs their loyal fan cheering them on with support, right Jayne?"

Jayne nodded happily to him. "Of course!"

"Does this mean I get to be an angel again?" Metatron asked hopefully.

Chuck laughed and patted Metatron's shoulder. "Yeah, right." Then he stopped laughing. "No, no, that's never—never happening."

"That's probably a good call." Metatron said in agreement.

"I think so."

"Well...let's do this." Metatron said, looking over to Jayne who held the manuscript.

Jayne looked beyond excited for this. God wanted her and Metatron to help him write his Autobiography which she couldn't wait to read if he aloud her to of course. It would be nice to know about her best friend who just happened to be God.

WILL CONTINUE IN NEXT CHAPTER...

Btw these tales are originally posted on Fanfic Net, so check them out there if you want. Thanks.

[bluevelvetcat]

I’ve never been to Italy before, but I had no doubt that I’d absolutely love it, and surprise, I did.

I really can’t say why, in almost 20 years of active overseas travel, I never went to Italy, even though its wealth of history, art and culture made it a natural must-visit destination. Because this was my first time, I wanted to concentrate on the obvious iconic places and not spread out too much, so we limited ourselves to Venice, Florence and Rome, with one day trip to the Tuscan countryside. Unsurprisingly, I took more photos in Italy than in Ireland and Scotland combined.

Fridge magnet count: 5

Favourite meals: scrumptious seafood soup in Venice that was packed with flavour, the Florentine steak experience, heavenly tiramisu at a restaurant we went to for my birthday in Rome.

Best gelato: at an award-winning gelateria in San Gimignano. I don’t know if it was Best Ever, but it’s definitely up there.

Worst gelato: one should never eat at super-touristy spots, but I made a mistake with a gelato sold at Ponte Vecchio in Florence. It was grainy, mediocre, and cost me a whopping 8 Euro.

Most valuable wardrobe item: my pair of Skechers walking shoes. They’re hardly the height of fashion, but they saved my feet, especially from Rome’s cobblestone streets.

Venice

Maybe it was the lack of sleep due to an early flight, but on my first day in Venice I felt like pinching myself constantly; it was just too surreal being surrounded by the famous scenery I’ve seen countless times in travel brochures at work. Of course, no images can compare to experiencing the beauty of Venice in real life, which even the giant hordes of tourists can’t spoil. As we quickly found out, Google Maps is your best friend in Venice, and Italy in general; getting lost in the web of alleyways is not so romantic when you’re lugging your heavy suitcase behind you.

We didn’t do the gondola ride; I’m not against cheesy touristy things, but according to my Mum it’s way too short and overpriced.

Aerial Venice

St Mark’s Square

Rialto Bridge

We did spend half a day on a trip to the islands of Murano and Burano. The former is famous for its Venetian glass factories, and the latter for its brightly coloured fishermen’s houses and lace products. I bought myself a black Murano glass necklace that was the least gaudy thing at the factory shop; I’m a fan of bright colours but the crazy colour combos were too much even for me.

Colourful Burano

Glass blowing demonstration at Murano

Funky bridge

Florence

Firenze, as Italians call it, was even more packed with tourists than Venice, if that’s possible. Our accommodation in Florence, while not necessarily the most comfortable, was certainly memorable. Once you opened the door on the street, you were greeted with a looong flight of stairs, and a fresco of a saint on the wall at the top – it always gave us a fright at night. The room had no windows and an old medieval wall on one side, which gave it a dungeon feel, and because the ceiling was so tall there was room for a mezzanine bedroom.

Seeing the ornate Cathedral of Santa Maria del Fiore, or Duomo as it’s also known, slide into view for the first time was a truly breathtaking “wow” moment. The intricate latticework of green and white marble is absolutely gorgeous; by contrast, the interior is very simple and stark. We braved the 412-step climb up the bell tower and were amply rewarded with the views of Florence and the cathedral’s dome. The Uffizi Gallery, with its collection of ancient Roman, medieval and Renaissance art, was another highlight. Someone with a morbid sense of humour has arranged a violent little corner, with artworks like Caravaggio’s severed head of Medusa, David and Goliath’s head, and Artemisia Gentileschi’s gory Judith Beheading Holofernes.

Duomo

Views from the Duomo bell tower

Ponte Vecchio

Uffizi Gallery

Florence from the Bardini Gardens

Don’t know what this procession was about, but it was cool

Siena, San Gimignano and Pisa

While in Florence, we went on a day trip around Tuscany, visiting Siena, San Gimignano and Pisa. We also had a lunch stop at a winery in the Chianti region; I’m usually not a fan of wine but the Chianti I tried there was the closest I’ve ever come to liking it.

Siena We had a short but interesting tour with a local guide (engaging and enthusiastic), visiting the impressive main square where the annual horse race event, Palio, is held. Siena Cathedral’s stripey interior is also quite magnificent.

San Gimignano An impossibly scenic hilltop village, made even more scenic by the colourful flags in preparation for a medieval festival. We also got our best views of the idyllic Tuscan countryside.

Pisa Yes the Leaning Tower is deservedly iconic, and you absolutely have to take that cheesy photo propping it up or your life is not complete. For me though the unexpected highlight was Camposanto Monumentale di Pisa, a sort of unusual indoor cemetery. It’s a huge space with faded frescoes, lots of beautiful sculptures and sarcophagi, and blissfully no crowds.

Siena main square

Siena Cathedral

San Gimignano

Camposanto Monumentale di Pisa

The Leaning Tower of Pisa

Rome

It’s impossible not to be impressed with Rome’s imperial magnificence. We had five days there, which gave us plenty of time to explore its famous sights: the Trevi Fountain, Vatican and St. Peter’s Basilica, the Pantheon, the Spanish Steps, Piazza Navona, the Colosseum and Roman Forum. We also took a bus trip to visit Villa d’Este and its World Heritage gardens.

The weather got hotter the further south we went; by the time we got to Rome midday siesta at the hotel became a must. The upside were the beautiful balmy evenings, which I wish I could bottle and take home with us. Evening was also often the time for the unexpected highlights, like a walk alongside the river bank lined with cafes, or the stunning view from the roof of the grandiose Altar of the Fatherland at Piazza Venezia. We gazed at the remains of the Roman Forum bathed in golden light, and tried in vain to comprehend the sheer span of thousands of years these ruins witnessed.

Trevi Fountain

Vatican Museum

Fountain at Piazza Navona

Spanish Steps

Villa d’Este gardens

Villa d’Este gardens

The Forum and Colosseum

St. Peter’s Basilica made me think back to Bill Bryson’s book about his travels in Europe, where he descibed it as the only building I have ever been in where I have felt like sinking to my knees, clasping my hands heavenward and crying, “Take me home, Lord.” I can’t say I had exactly the same reaction, but in my eyes it is definitely the Church to Rule Them All.

Europe Trip: Italy I've never been to Italy before, but I had no doubt that I'd absolutely love it, and surprise, I did.

[tsuki-fairy-blog]

cyan, peach, and teal for the ask meme please!

Thank you! (Sorry I’m late!)

cyan: one fact about your hometown?

Well, is hometown the town near where I live to or the town (city) where I’ve been born but moved away? Okay I pickt the town where I live near to now: it was (is) a famous hanseatic city in germany well known for it’s sald in the middleages. For me (I study history) is it not that interesting because we have no castle or ruler family here. And if there is no princess it’s not interesting for me ;D

peach: 5 favorite characters of all time?

This is so hard. If I’d choose historical persons I couldn’t choose only 5 so I only take fictional characters here. Oh and there is no order in how I like them I’ll just name them 1,2,3,4,5 but it has nothing to do with an order!

1. Yamazaki Miyu: So this is the only manga character I’ll mention here. Actually my manga time is over but I wanted to mention Miyu-chan here. The character is from the manga GALS! by Mihona Fuji and I still enjoy reading this crazy stuff. Miyu is a very sensitive character with a sad past and sad situation according her parents. She was neglected by her parents since they divorced. Because of this she felt always lonely, and became what children with no attention becomes: a gang leader, thiev and problem-child. When she was 14 she was kind of rescued my a policeman who she fell in love with and became best friend with his younger sister. From this time on she became a good student and a very sweet girl. I still cry when I read her story. The saddest thing is that her mother doesn’t care of her in ANY way. Those episodes are always very hurting and really touching. But even though she has this bad background she is such a nice and sweet and cheering girl. I admire this.

2 Narcissa Black/Malfoy: Omg I love her so much. For everyone who doesn’t know, she’s from Harry Potter . What I pretty much like about her is that she is SO caring about her family. For sure she’s on the evil side (but I don’t think that she would have chosen that side if she had the choice). She hasn’t much “screen time” in the books and even less in the movies (which is a pity). However she was described as breathtaking beautiful however since Harry always tells the story (except for some extra chapters) she was referred to be very cold at the same time. In one of the extra chapters is shown how she. followed by her sister Bellatrix, secretly meets Snape and asks him to watch over Draco. Actually every time she appears in the books (or movies) it’s shown how important her family is for her and that it’s even more important than loyalty to the dark Lord and his plans. When Harry was “kept” in the last book by Voldemord and his companions he only survived because Narcissa lied to Voldemord, telling him Harry was dead (after she asked Harry if Draco was still alive and Harry replied with yes). So actually it was her fault that the death eaters failed at last, well she didn’t care. It was also obvious that she cared a lot about her sister and had a strong bond to her. Anyway when it came out that Bellatrix’ loyalty for Voldemort seemed to be as strong or even stronger than her love for her little sister Narcissa focused on her “real” family, which means Draco and Lucius. This is why I think that she is a very adorable and sensitive character too. I guess mothers play a big role in Harry Potter and she is definitively one of them. I’d love to read more about her youth. I imagine her as a sweet and shy but very pretty girl which is always protected by her stubborn elder sister… it would be nice if we’d get a story of the Harry Potter protagonist’s parents once too (ok, we know a bit about James and Sirius but honestly..they weren’t very likeable characters in their youth). Well it got long sorry, but I love her and have to write a lot^^

3. Mephis SaDiablo from the Black Jewels series by Anne Bishop. Probably most women or girls who read the series will either fall in love with Daemon or Lucivar, or probably with Saetan too. They are all POV-characters and very important and very cool and very hot and so on. From his first appearance on I loved Mephis. It’s a bit hard to tell the story because it’s a bit confusing. A little summary: The world where the story takes place is parted in 3 parts: Tereille, Kaleer and Hell. So Tereille is for all who are alive, Hell is for the dead (and demon-dead) people and Kaleer something in-between. Well Mephis is (I guess the eldest) son of Saetan the high lord of hell and Hekatah (bitch) the high priestess of hell. Compared to his half-brothers Daemon and Lucivar Mephis seems to be calmer and less hasty. However it is referred that he likes reading and theater. Idk why but I love him. He is a nice variety to the stubborn super hot playboy types who are the protagonists of the story and I like this. I can’t really tell more. Every girl who is in love with a book character will understand my feelings I guess.^^

4. Myrcella Lannister: Omg just another cute character! Please keep in mind that I talk about the book-Myrcella here (rather the A song of Ice and Fire Myrcella and not the GoT Myrcella). In the books Myrcella is a little girl which is even younger than Arya at the beginning of the series (so Myrcella is about eight). I actually liked her from the beginning. In the first book when the King and the rest arrived at Winterfell Myrcella had to sew together with Arya, Sansa and Jeyne while Septa Mordane watched over them. However Sansa and Jeyne, bitchy as always, backbite about Arya’s sewing (and appearance) and also the Septa was really mean to Arya, telling her that her sewing was awful (while Myrcella’s wasn’t better) so that Arya began to cry and ran away after asking Myrcella if it was okay if she left. It was obvious that Myrcella felt very uncomfortable with the situation and wanted to help Arya in any way but Arya was already off before she could say any more. Probably people will ask: So she’s the princess why didn’t she do anything? And I’ll answer: because she was the youngest person in the room with her being eight, Arya nine and Sansa and Jeyne eleven. I think she tried to and felt sorry for Arya and this is what was touching. Her uncle Tyrion said once about Myrcella that she had the beauty from her mother but not her nature. So Myrcella is a calm and sweet and kindhearted girl, referred to be very intelligent and brave too if we look at her time in Dorne. What I want to say is that I like kind-hearted innocent girls and I think in real life there are less of them (but I include me to be one xp).

5. James Pimplebottom from Rubyred, Sapphireblue and Emeraldgreen by Kerstin Gier. In the books as well as in the movies James is my favorite character. He is a ghost (which he doesn’t know) and lives in the school of the protagonist Gwendolyn Shepard because the school building was his parent’s house in the 18th century. Like I mentioned before, he doesn’t know that he’s dead and thinks that he only has fewer dreams because of a sickness he has (he actually had smallpox and also dies because of them which he doesn’t know). James is about 20 years old and still behaves like living in the 18th century (fanning with his fan and walking like he was the king): he’s very polite but also very annoyed that for example Gwendolyn who can see him, isn’t behaving like a lady from the 18th century should (the story mostly takes place in the 21th century). However when she asks him to teach her things from the 18th century he’s really happy about it and helps her. Because he’s very finical he always seems a bit gay (which he isn’t) and that makes the situations even funnier. So everyone read these awesome books and watch the movies :D they’re so good (the books are better though but the movies are great too and they are available with an english dub too).

teal: what mythical creature would you want to be?

It’s random but - a vampire.

[fictionzonedfangirl-blog]

I’ve been waiting for February 26 to come since last year. Why? It’s the day that I’d finally see EXO perform live for their 2-day #EXO’rDium concert. I’ve mentioned in my previous post all the confusion and the hardships I’ve gone through all for the love of that 9-member boy group who made me fall deeply and madly in love with them with their charms and undeniable talent.

When D-DAY came, I went to the venue super early despite the fact that it’s reserved seating. Of course I’d rather spend the remaining hours waiting in line than lose my mind because of excitement at home. Along with my cousin and her best friend, we went around Gateway mall to window shop to kill time. EXO songs were blaring in the mall’s speakers and it pumped our energy even more. It was around 1:30 in the afternoon when we decided to go to the respective gates assigned for us.

On normal days, I don’t like long lines or waiting in general. But that day, I didn’t mind waiting for the gates to be opened under the blazing sun. I brought a book with me so I was being productive while waiting. I met a new friend, Belle, while waiting. We talked about our favorite EXO moments, variety shows and upon discovering that we have the same bias, the connection went to a whole different level. She even gave me Chanyeol-designed socks which were too adorable fo mah freakin’ lyf!!!

Around 2 PM, there was progress in the line. We were ushered to the main lobby of the Red Gate entrance. EXO songs were still playing and some of the fans were literally dancing, singing and crying all at the same time. It was crazy! You could feel everyone’s excitement. At 3 PM, gates were finally opened and we went inside to our designated seats.

The first thing I thought when I reached my seat is that: “Fck! This is it. I’m here and I made it. All the tears and the pagtitipid came down to this. All the waiting is over.” I got really kilig and nervous at the same time. Nervous for the fact that i don’t know anyone from the section I’m in but thank God because my social skills didn’t fail me! I tried talking to the girl behind me and she was really nice! She also happened to be alone so yeey instant friend.

There were two other girls I met few minutes before the concert started and yeah, we clicked as well. We went on talking about EXO and other K-pop groups that we liked. We also commented on how rude some fans are. Honestly, I really felt like I’ve known them for so long because of the way we actually talked to each other. Hannah even gave me a Chanyeol photocard! #hoorayforfreebies

We were given hand banners and I fixed it together with my lightstick and Beakhyun cloth banner (which I didn’t use because I was so charmed by Chanyeol I felt like I was cheating if I used Baekhyunie’s banner hahahaha!). A few more stories and whatnots later, the lights finally went out signalling the start of the show.

Swear to the good Lord! I was mesmerized at the sight of the silver ocean. It felt freaking surreal. Never in my wildest dreams I imagined myself being there, part of the crowd who would cheer their hearts out for our beloved boys. I thought that I’d just cheer with them on screen but no. I was there. Part of the hyper and super-mega-intense crowd with them just a few meters away from me.

An AVP was shown which was some sort of introductory narrative in FILIPINO SUBS!!! I cannot. Then the LED wall opened revealing the 9 epitome of perfection. Char! The boys performed a remix version of MAMA followed immediately by Monster.

I was in awe. I was so used to watching their performances in YouTube that I had to pinch my arm to assure myself that what I’m seeing that moment was the actual thing. I cried because it’s just too much. I felt like all my internal organs were dancing because of too much kilig. It was unexplainable. Another thing that striked me was their freaking visuals. They’re so perfect!!! Too handsome to handle. It felt like my poor heart was on the verge of exploding.

When the first part ended they had a moment to introduce themselves. I couldn’t take my eyes off Park Chanyeol! He’s so cool and funny and talented. Aside from him, it was their leader, Suho, who caught my attention! God! He looked like a fcking Prince straight outta fairytale! The way he talked to the fans both in English and in Korean had some certain swag laced with undeniable grace.

One of the most loved performances was their acoustic medley. They didn’t just perform but they talked to the fans as well. It was so heartwarming when they said that they’re amazed on how passionate and hot were the PH EXO-Ls. Also, they noticed how we’re so good at singing their songs. They also mentioned that they tried Filipino food. D.O said he liked Lechong Manok and they expressed their love with Jollibee hamburger and chicken. Bonus sight: Kai and Chanyeol chanting “Chicken! Chicken!”--so adorable!!!

The medley was followed by their hits Love Me Right, Call Me Baby, Playboy etc. There were also videos which are so freaking adorbs. The one shown right before the 3.6.5 and Lucky performance. The energy doubled when Chanyeol had his guitar solo which was followed by Drop That. Honestly I thought the big dome would collapse because of the crowd’s screams and feet stomping. The Lightsaber is one of the highlights for me. IT WAS SPECTACULAAAAAR!!!

They continued playing with one another on stage in between performances which made the audience craved for more. OTP moments were there but I was too stunned to see it live and I think that I’d keep that to my mind and heart. Hahaha! I was touched when Suho told the crowd that the DAY 2 crowd was so much more hotter and full of energy. Even Xiumin was amazed and he said that we really knew how to have fun. Baekhyun said that if they were put inside a room full of EXO-Ls he could tell if one’s a Filipino because of the passion, dedication and love were into another level, he could recognize it instantly.

When it was nearing the end of the show, they thanked us fans for the unwavering support and the unconditional love. They sang a few lines of Hawak Kamay which they sang on their very first stage performance here in the Philippines. Suho said that they’d learn new tagalog song to sing for their concert here next time and that ‘next time’’s pretty soon.

My throat was aching after the concert because I screamed “Mahal din kita!” at the top of my lungs as reply to Chanyeol every time he shouts “Mahal ko kayo!” to the audience. But it’s okay. I felt no tinge of regret. The best part of the show was when they screamed “INIIROG KITA, BES”, which was printed on the fan project banner, before they sang their final song Angel. Seriously, the hardships, pagtitipid and all the looooong wait really did paid off. It was absolutely amazing and I’d save up to see them again but hopefully with my mom and sister. They made sure that every minute of the three-hour show was worth it.