#I’ve had a fucking week and need to exercise some demons so

[cursedwretch]

Another Drop

young!Silco x AFAB!Reader; Word count: 1706 Words; Rating 18+ MDNI AO3

It’s early days in the Zaunite’s smuggling empire, and you’ve tagged along for a deal.

Deeply, deeply inspired by the young!silco concepts.

Contains: Public Sex, dom!silco, smoking, rough sex, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, exhibitionism/voyeurism, gun play (if you squint?? The FMC is never threatened with it).

Another drop.

Silco and I sat in the alley, waiting for Vander to finish the sale inside, which was pretty fucking novel, if I’m honest. I rarely joined runs, and Vander playing the businessman was even rarer. Unfortunate for us all, the fucker we were selling to happened to hate Silco—Shocker, I know—though clearly not enough to avoid our business entirely. I was reminded of why as I watched the man before me fish a cigarette out of his pocket. The little pill.

“You shouldn’t do that,” I narrowed my eyes at him. He froze, hand cupping the air as he cocked his brow.

I shot a leading glance to the crate he was seated on. He knew full well what manner of shit was stuffed within. One wrong ember…

“Life’s short,” he shrugged, fixing me with a wicked grin as the lighter sparked to life.

I scoffed, shaking my head as I watched him take a languorous drag. His head tipped back, eyes fluttering closed as he exhaled, fighting the tug at the corners of his mouth. Show off.

He held it up, level with his eyes, perched carefully between his fingers, “it was worth the effort.”

Right. He’s insisted on that foolish fucking run for a crate of these the week prior. I let out another exasperated laugh. “You’re an idiot.”

His answering snicker was low and treacherous, “unfortunate for us, seeing as I’m the brains of this little operation.”

“We’re doomed,” I held my hand aloft, “give me a hit.”

“You don’t smoke.”

I cast a quick glance over my shoulder, rolling my eyes, “life’s short, isn’t it?”

I heard the crunch of boots on gravel as he hopped down from the crate, a saunter in his step. As always. I keep my eyes forward, smirking towards the alley entrance as he approached.

“Close your eyes.”

My breath hitched; that I didn’t expect. Still, I wasn’t one for giving him what we wanted. Not easily, at least.

I glared his way instead, “we’re working.”

“Oh, I’m well aware,” his eyes sparked as he closed the remaining distance, dashing the ashes with a dramatic flick.

I stared back, eyes narrowed.

“Let me give you what you want,” his eyes landed on my mouth as he drawled.

Fine. I’ll bite.

My world went dark, save for the remnants of that Zaun green that made its way into every crack and crevice of our city, stamped to the back of my eyelids. A constant reminder of where, and who, we were. Another crunch of gravel alerted me to his movement, followed by the warmth of his body, inches from my own.

“Head back,” he murmurs, “just a little.”

I hesitated. His laugh was rumbling, amused. My fingers gripped at the crate beneath me as I felt his fingers on my chin, tilting my back. I let him guide me.

The warmth of the cigarette hovered over my cheek, setting my nerves alight, followed by his lips ghosting over mine. His fingers pull at my lower lip, an instant little tug. Them smoke, warm and acrid and intoxicating, streamed from his lips into my mouth. I took in all the air he was willing to offer, greedy fingers threatening to make their way into his hair. My lungs burned as he retreated, just barely.

My eyes fluttered open, and I swallowed back the urge to cough.

“Good?” His mouth quirked up, eyes dark, roaming down my body.

Divine. But he didn’t need to know that.

I nodded.

“More?”

My own eyes betrayed me—fixed on that little scar on his upper lip. Another nod.

“Good girl,” he purred, shifting closer. His eyes burned into mine as dropped the cigarette to the ground, stamping it out. “Too bad.”

My legs parted automatically, making a space he eagerly filled. “Silco,” I warned, my words cut off in a gasp as his fingers tangled in my hair with a sharp tug.

His lips brushed from my ear to my jaw as he murmured, “Corvin’s a haggler. That wordy little shit will keep Vander busy for time enough.”

He punctuated his sentence with another tug, muffling my sharp cry with his lips. My hands found the lapel of his jacket, tugging him closer as he rolled his hips against me.

He was all tongue and teeth as he pressed me against the crate, mouth trailing down my neck. Fingers dipped beneath my collar, shifting the material to expose more skin.

He smelled of cedar, smoke, and sin.

Another treacherous whine escaped my lips and he let out one of his trademarked wicked, rumbling laughs. He held my hips against him, pressing against the divots with enough force to bruise. I try to buck out of his grip, desperate for more.

His hand found its way to the front of my pants, sliding beneath the waistband with practiced ease. I let out a ragged gasp as he found my core.

“Silco,” I gasp.

He smirk, “shh, I’m working.”

“Fucker,” I said between gasps.

He laughed, “yes, you know I think you’re right.”

He brought his fingers up, glistening with my slick, to pop them into his mouth. I pant as I watch.

“Open,” he instructed, pressed my lips apart and slid those very same fingers inside, they’re firm against my tongue.

He purred, “you always taste so good.”

With another sharp tug I was pulled of the crate entirely, feet hitting the ground. My legs unsteady as he turned me around, bending me over the crates until I felt wood kiss my cheek.

“You want more?” He teased, pressing himself against me. My back arched automatically, grinding my ass against the unmistakable hardness pressed against me.

“Please, Sil,” I whispered. “‘S not enough time.”

One hand tugged my pants down my thigh, his other hand at the small of my back, holding me in place. His cock, hard and teasing, slid between my folds.

I let out a cry as he buried himself inside me – the stretch making my head spin. I relished it.

“Sweetheart,” he shushed me, fingers sliding over my mouth as he pulled me up.

He wasn’t soft. No, he fucked me viscously. Bottomed out with each thrust, pressed against me until the wood bit the skin of my hips. Each snap sending indecent sounds ricocheting through the alley. Fire began to pool low in my core.

He mouthed at my ear, whispering while he fucked into me, “always so good for me.”

I whine, back arching against him.

He started to ramble, as he always did when he was close. Voice rough, gravely, “gods. When we get back, fuck, I’m going to take my time with you. Fuck you until you forget everything but my name—“

There’s a noise at the end of the alley, a crunch of gravel that freezed my blood over. Followed with the click of a gun. I whip my head in its direction, blinking past the haze.

A man stood frozen at the mouth of the alley, equal parts afraid and intrigued. Some poor idiot who stumbled down the wrong alley.

I pant against Silco’s hand, his other held the gun aloft—towards the stranger.

No one moves for a moment. Silco is the first to break, thrusting into me. He lets me fall forward, and my eyes snap closed with a needy moan.

“Hear that?” He sneered at the stranger, voice a low growl, “she’s occupied. Find another alley.”

I turn my head, wood scratching against the skin of my cheek. “Piss off,” I grit out at the stranger, eyes sliding closed one more.

And he must have listened—I hear the clatter of the gun against the crate, feel Silco double forward, chest pressed to my back. His teeth sink int my shoulder with growl, hips snapping against mine at a renewed pace.

His breath peppered my skin as he husked, “such a perfect little cunt.”

My legs shook, “Silco I’m—I need to—“

“Not yet,” he hissed, though his fingers found their way to my clit.

I blinked back tears as I whined, “I can’t—“

“Wait,” he barked, voice growing huskier.

I clawed at the crate, the wood collecting beneath my nails.

“Do you know? How. Fucking. Hard. It is?” he grit out, each word punctuated with a hard thrust, “to pretend I’m not thinking of your perfect fucking cunt every moment we work together.”

I moaned, babbling incessantly—his name, pleas, apologies, anything. Whatever would let him stop fucking torturing me.

“You were made for me,” he panted, grinding his fingers against me, “you understand?”

“Yes,” I cried out, “only you. Silco, please—“

“Good girl,” he gasped, thrusts growing uneven and breath growing ragged, “come for me, darling.”

I fell apart at his command, vision going blurry at the edges, each grind of his hips sending me further past the edge. Gods. Fuck. He let out a low groan, hips stuttering as he growled my name. He rocked against me until my legs ceased their quaking and my moans quieted. Until the world around us started to resume. Back to reality. He pressed a kiss to my cheek as he slid out, murmuring, “divine.”

I panted, propping myself up to turn around. I needed to face him, as the cold chill of the undercity air suddenly sinked into my skin.

He knew. He received me with open arms, pulled me into a deep kiss, and fingers finally, finally found their way into his soft hair. Long hair freshly fallen free from its usual bindings, dusting against his neck. He smiled against my mouth as he pulled back, blue eyes warm and full of light.

“Sap,” I laughed, batting at his chest.

He pressed a soft kiss to my neck with a quiet hum.

The door to the building cracked open, revealing Vander who quickly cycles from surprise, confusion, to an all too knowing smirk.

One last word to Corvin and we were on our way. Silco looped a lazy arm around my shoulder, a freshly-lit cigarette perched between his fingers as we walked. Vander kept quiet until we had a few blocks distance, looking down at his partner to tease, “On the merchandise? Animals.”

[shlonguru]

Can we get one of Alastor fucking you in his radio booth and broadcasting it to fuck with Vox~ pretty please with a cherry on top💕

God thank you so much for your request and this idea, it really inspired me so much and I might do even more with this cause I find it inherently hot hehe. I'm so happy so many people enjoyed the first part of Alastor x Fem!Reader x Vox and I'm a degenerate so I wrote a second. I hope you guys like it too! Enjoy my fellow degenerates! o/

I would also like to thank @wipmoop for their amazing art cover for this smut! They're truly the best you can check them out !

And with this, I present you, drumroll please :

Alastor X Fem!Reader X Vox 2 - Rematch !

Summary : You're tired of waiting for your rematch and decide to take things into your own hands. Are you ready to face the consequences of your actions ?

Warning : 18+, Smut, dirty talking, oral, oral creampie, creampie, threesome, cum swallowing, praise kink, teasing, overstimulation, rough, cunnilingus, hair pulling, bondage, spanking.

Word Count : 4883 words (Yup, it's worse than the first one.)

After the events of the party Alastor brought you back to the hotel, explaining to Charlie that you might’ve hmm…had more than you could handle. She was delighted at the idea of you residing at the hotel and extended an unlimited invitation to you. You had your own room and actually enjoyed the people there more than you thought you would. You thought you’d give redemption a shot. However, you had been dreaming of your rematch with Vox and Alastor and it occupied most of your daily thoughts, as much as you hated to admit it.

It had been 2 weeks since you moved in and you hadn’t really been seeing Alastor since the party, he was a busy man after all, he was usually very polite when he saw you and would give you a hand kiss or wink at you. You hadn’t seen Vox at all since the party, but it wasn’t too surprising. Slowly, you started realizing that you were okay with what happened being a one-off thing.

This day you had just finished exercises with everyone and was chilling having some tea when Charlie exclaimed: “Oh Alastor is hosting his radio show! We should bring him some tea! Where’s Niffty? She’d be super-fast.” She looked around unable to find her.”

“She was chasing a family of roaches last time I saw her.” You explained drinking your tea. “I can bring him if you want.” You offered, not thinking much of it, but knowing the idea of seeing Alastor brought a slight smile to your face.

“Really?” Asked Charlie with sparks in her eyes. “That is such a selfless act I love it!”

“Is it?” You questioned. She nodded furiously before handing you a tray with a cup of tea, some milk, sugar, and some biscuits on it.

You left the group and started making your way to the radio tower. As you approached it you heard the demon speaking into his mic.

“And that my fellows, is why you should never trust a demon whose name starts with a V. I will return in a moment, enjoy this musical break of electro swing.”

You arrived in front of the door and knocked.

“Come in.” You heard.

You entered the room to find Alastor sitting in front of his station, his legs crossed.

“Oh, Hello Dear!” He exclaimed seeing it was you at the door.

“Hi! Charlie asked me to bring you some tea. How’s your show going?” You smiled as you entered the room. Alastor looked at you intensely as you walked past him, his smile as wide as ever, you could feel his gaze on your body, you were wearing a short red dress hugging your shape and flared at the bottom and a pair of black thigh highs. You sat the tray on the coffee table he had next to him and poured him a cup of tea.

“The show is going as well as it needs to be.” He replied coldly, pausing afterwards. “But more importantly, this dress suits you very well, I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress since that night at the party.” He proclaimed calmly.

Your face flushed lightly and he noticed. He hadn’t talked about the party since that night and the simple mention of it sent back embarrassing flashbacks to your mind. Not that you regretted it.

“Oh really? I hadn’t noticed. This is more casual though.” You replied, not looking him in the eyes.

“Is it now Dear?” Asked the demon searching for your gaze then looking you from the bottom up.

“I'm glad you like it." You teased then presented the cup in front of him and thought you noticed a quick glance at your cleavage.

This was enough for you to decide that you had done progress at the hotel and that meant you deserved a little reward, and if you were honest with yourself, you had missed Alastor and Vox’s touch since that night, after all, they had given you a night you could never forget as promised. You had been a good girl but now it was time to drop the act.

You lingered giving him a good look. You then asked innocently: “Is there anything I can do to help?”

He took a good look at you, almost as if he was trying to gauge your intentions. “Actually, I do, would you grab me the mic from the shelf over there.”

“Sure!” You replied smiling. You made your way to the shelf and pretended to struggle to grab the mic which fell to the floor and rolled under the shelf. You then got on all fours and bent over trying to grab it, almost exposing your parts. After grabbing it you stood back up and turned around only to be met with Alastor smiling widely, leaning on the counter of his studio.

“Are you doing okay, Dear?” He grinned tauntingly before taking a sip.

“I don’t know, am I? Here’s your mic.” You handed him the mic. He put down his cup of tea and grabbed the mic slowly, not breaking eye contact with you. He then proceeded to pull swiftly on it, bringing you with it as you hadn’t let go yet. Your body ended up pressed against his.

“You know if you had been craving my attention this badly you should have mentioned it sooner.” He exclaimed looking deep into your eyes.

“Did I crave your attention, or did you miss giving it to me?” You asked smugly smirking back.

“Oh, I can give it to you alright.” He smiled wider, his mouth an inch from yours.

“Do it then.” You smiled back, holding the fold of his jacket.

You felt his lips crash onto yours, the both of you dropping the mic simultaneously. He grabbed your hips tightly pulling you into the kiss, kissing you even deeper as he moved one hand behind your neck. He then lowered his hands to your ass before grabbing both of your cheeks tightly, pulling you off the ground, you legs locking around him instinctively. He turned around, still kissing you while holding your weightless body and sat you on the edge of the counter of his studio. He grabbed both of your wrists and laid you on your back, pinning your hands above your head. He then proceeded to kiss down your neck and onto your cleavage.

“Coming here dressed this way was your mistake.” He smirked.

“Debatable.” You smirked back.

He kept both of your hands pinned together with one of his and took a good look of your flushed, panting, and eager body. While scanning down your body he noticed something that made his eyes widen slightly before he went back to looking into your eyes with a devious smile. His second hand travelled down your body making you realize how sensitive you felt already.

“You might not have missed my attention but this part of you certainly has.” His hand then rubbed against your womanhood, making you realize just how soaked you were already as you squirmed.

“Listen Dear,” he looked at you, still rubbing your pussy, “I’m going to let go of your hands, but you may not touch anything but yourself with them.” He then let go of your hands and pussy before bending over you, resting both of his hands on each side of your head.

“Understood?” He menacingly whispered with a very serious grin.

You nodded.

“Good girl. And be sure to make all of hell know how good you’re feeling.” He smiled before removing his jacket which he threw on his couch.

“Wha-“ You were about to question but then saw him casually turn on the mic of his station. The sign [On Air] turning bright red confirming what you thought.

Alastor then proceeded to kneel in front of you and pull you closer, to the edge of the counter, he then ripped your panties in one movement and started digging in.

You immediately felt his tongue dig deep inside of you, earning a loud moan out of you as he spread your walls. The moans kept pouring as he enthusiastically ate you out, alternating between the inside and the outside of your pussy that he was eating like the first meal he’d had in days. He kept moving his tongue in motions that sent jolts up and down your body.

Before you realized, your hands had made their way into Alastor’s hair, pulling slightly as the pleasure intensified. You only noticed when the pleasure stopped. You looked down, confused, and immediately realized your mistake, letting go of his hair, as the tall demon stood back on his feet, looking at you calmly, which somehow made it scarier.

“Didn’t we agree on you touching nothing but yourself? See not only have you not touched yourself, but you’ve also touched me, and I am not part of you, yet.” He said menacingly.

“Sorry…” You muttered.

“Too late Darling, I’m afraid bad girls need to be disciplined.”

You stared at him as you witnessed him calmly removing his bowtie then grabbing both of your wrists once again, this time tying them together, in a very tight fashion.

“Good.” He exclaimed proud of his work.

And with that he resumed eating you out, this time more aggressively. You felt your walls tighten as he attacked them relentlessly, grabbing your thighs with both of his hands. Your moans were getting louder and louder as his name poured continuously out of your mouth until you felt the knot that had been building up break and the orgasm wash over your body, making your legs shake in the process.

“Holy shit…” You blurted, panting hard as you watched Alastor stand up and give you a quick kiss.

“See, you know how to be a good girl.” He whispered in your ear before licking your ear lobe. You felt his throbbing crotch press against yours.

Before any of you could add anything, you saw a glowing blue circle draw itself around the both of you.

“What is th-“ You couldn’t finish your sentence as you felt yourself fall down through what had now obviously been a portal. The radio demon fell with you, though in a much classier and composed manner, almost as if he knew it was coming.

You felt yourself land on something soft and looked around. It was a very large bed. Alastor had landed comfortably on his feet next to the bed.

“Took him long enough…” He huffed.

You scanned the room; it was very large and luxurious, like a palace. It was a giant bedroom with huge French windows, and tall wooden doors at its entrance. As soon as you laid your eyes on said doors they opened violently.

“The fuck is wrong with you !?” Yelled the handsome tall demon entering the room. It was a very furious Vox. Seeing him furious made you immediately crave him.

“Well, hello to you too.” Smiled Alastor, still in the same relaxed position.

“Why would you broadcast her for all of hell to listen to? Have you lost your mind?” He screamed unable to compose himself.

“I only did so long enough for you to notice.” He mentioned “And if you were so bothered by it, then maybe you should have noticed sooner.” He smiled wider.

“What a dumbass.” Vox walked past Alastor and arrived in front of you. He smiled for the first time.

“Long time no see y/n !” He leaned in front of you making you blush as you took a good look at his handsome figure.

“Hi Vox! I’ve missed you!” You smiled with your face still flushed from your orgasm. He held your chin up gently.

“Fuck I really missed that hot face of yours, I’m sorry you were stuck with such an ungrateful prick for so long, I knew you should’ve moved into my place instead. You’ve clearly gone way too long without getting some well-deserved action, which would have never happened here by the way.” He said that last part louder on purpose. He looked down for a second. “Dear, you are making my sheets wet already, did you really miss me that much?” He smiled looking at your exposed parts, dripping onto the bed.

“We could have settled on a date to have our rematch instead of you exposing her to every lowlife that would listen.” He turned to Alastor.

“Our dear friend couldn’t wait any longer and well I guess I had to take matters into my own hands.” He said innocently.

“You’re such a piece of shit.” Proclaimed Vox with a wide grin on his face, briefly glitching. “I see you’re unable to try and beat me without a head start you radio bastard.”

“It’s not like I was doing anything you could do anyways, Mr. Flat-screen-no-tongue.” The redhead smirked.

“Oh really?” He glitched lightly. “Sit back, relax and shut the fuck up.”

He turned to you, and away from Alastor.

“Y/n! Time to get that rematch baby! Get your ass on the edge of that bed and spread those legs for me!”

Your body moved on its own at this command, and you managed to sit up at the edge of the bed despite your wrists still tied together and sat with your thighs spread open, revealing your most intimate part which couldn’t lie about how much you wanted this. Vox looked at you intensely, taking in the sight he had missed more than he thought he had and bent over resting one hand on his knee, the other holding the bowtie tying your wrists together with a finger.

“Has someone been a bad girl~?” He teased.

“That’s entirely possible.” You smirked back. You could tell from his face he liked that. He let go of your wrists and grabbed both of your thighs tightly, making you lose your balance and fall back onto the bed. The next instant, you sensed something that felt like a tongue slide inside your pussy. It sent immediate literal jolts up your body, earning a loud moan out of you that surprised even you. You came a little from that but didnt say anything, you moved your head, looking at what was going on down there and saw a big blue tongue, sliding out of Vox’s screen and eating out your deepest parts.

“Oh wow!” You exclaimed not knowing what to make of the mix of intense pleasure, surprise and shock you were feeling. A quick glance behind Vox and you saw Alastor roll his eyes unbothered having a cup of tea on the sofa not too far. You didn’t have time to really process anything as the TV demon kept eating you out aggressively, making your orgasm come sooner than you would have expected. You had absolutely no control over how fast it was building up, you just felt it snap and felt yourself come, arching your back embracing the wave of pleasure, grabbing your dress tightly as you did so.

You felt the tongue pull out of you and giving your whole pussy a good lick before Vox stood back up, wiping his face with a satisfied look on his it.

“Fuck you’re so hot when you come.” He blurted trying to keep his composure, but you could already see his member throbbing through his pants.

“Are you done with your ridiculous endeavor? An attempt to prove what exactly?” Exclaimed Alastor in a tone he tried to portray as nonchalant, but everyone else could tell he was ticked off. “Can’t you see she comes so easily you could barely even consider it a challenge.”

That statement pissed you off because as much as you were enjoying yourself you didn’t like being underestimated.

“I had no idea my enjoying myself would make you this insecure?” You responded smirking in your brattiest tone.

“Oh, I like you more and more.” Said Vox raising his brows and smiling at you.

You could swear you noticed an eye twitch on Alastor.

“You brat…clearly if you’re still feeling this confident then we haven’t gone hard enough on you.” He declared with a wicked smile scaring you as much as it turned you on. Alastor teleported onto the bed next to you, grabbed your hair firmly into a ponytail and pulled you further into the large bed, leaving you no choice but to follow him on your knees before pulling your face close to his. Your tied hands were hanging down in front of you as you looked up at the radio demon. “I guess we’ll have to fix that.” He kissed you deeply shoving his tongue in your mouth making your head spin. He pulled away from the kiss for a second.

“Sorry Dear, I am but a terrible spectator.” He went back into the kiss making you dizzy as he pulled down the top of your dress making your breasts bounce out of it. He grabbed one of your tit with his free hand, pinching your nipple and making you whine softly.

"Now you’re going to use all that confidence you were so proud of just seconds ago and you’re going to take it all in.” He let go of you and you fell on all fours, now facing his crotch. You took a good look and immediately noticed how tight his pants looked around his cock, it almost looked painful. With your tied wrists you unzipped his pants, pulling out your reward.

‘Was it this big last time?’ you thought to yourself. A slight look of surprise covering your face for a brief instant.

“Yes, it was.” Replied the radio demon, as if he had read your mind. “You were just too eager to notice.” He finished. You blushed heavily before giving your best shot at taking as much of his member as you could in your mouth, it amounted to about 2/3 of his manhood.

“Not quite, Dear, here, let me give you a hand.” He chuckled before shoving your face down his member, lodging it all the way down your throat. You couldn’t breathe but it still felt good, you pussy was quivering and dripping, and Vox noticed.

“Damn, look at your cunt, don’t worry I gotchu.” You heard Vox who was right behind you and the moment after felt him give your ass a hard spank. That made you moan loudly, and you knew Alastor felt it when you heard a groan coming from him, you looked up only to be met with an intense and serious gaze filled with lust coming from the radio demon. His hands were both in your hair, guiding your mouth up and down, enjoying himself.

Vox stood right behind you, and you heard his pants unzip. Immediately after, you felt one of his hands rest on your hips and the tip of his cock rub against your entrance teasingly.

“Have you missed that?” He asked, lust exuding off his tone. After a few seconds of his teasing, you wanted to beg for him to insert it but you mouth was too full for that.

“Come on…” He teased, knowing he put you in an impossible position.

In one motion you pulled your mouth off Alastor’s cock and pleaded loudly. “Vox please I need your cock in me!” You looked at him with a lewd look on your face .

Seeing you in that state made him blush briefly before he composed himself again.

“Fucking finally! You’re so fucking hot!” He groaned loudly pushing all of him inside of you in one go making you scream of pleasure in the process. You immediately felt Alastor grab your hair in the same fashion he had moments ago, pulling your face close and squinting.

“Let’s not get distracted now, shall we?” He demanded sternly.

Vox felt you tighten around him as you heard those words, pulling an involuntary moan out of him.

“You naughty girl, you’re loving this aren’t you?” He spanked roughly you before starting to thrust at a rather fast pace.

“Obviously.” Declared Alastor smiling before shoving your face back onto his cock. He was the one thrusting now, in fact, they both were and soon enough, you felt that coil build up once again in your insides. Your eyes rolled back as you felt the knot snap.

Vox felt you tighten almost uncomfortably around his member as you came. He grabbed both of our ass cheeks tightly.

“That’s right, come for me!” He groaned throwing his head back and fucking you through your climax, holding your ass tightly then spanking it.

You had just finished coming when you felt Alastor pull out of your mouth. You exhaled loudly catching your breath.

“Good job not suffocating, here’s your reward.” Said Alastor grabbing your panting figure, pulling you off Vox and propping you onto his cock as he stood on his knees, you were still panting but it was now intertwined with moans as he effortlessly moved you up and down his member. You moved your tied up wrists over his head, wrapping your arms around his neck and grabbing it gently, you kissed him softly yet longingly as the moans continuously flooded out of your mouth. You felt his member grow thicker inside of you, as expressed by your moans becoming louder. Your kiss was interrupted by the TV overlord who grabbed your chin, turning your face away from the radio demon.

“Now you can’t just give all your holes away so easily my dear.” He said calmly standing bent over next to you.

“My apologies.” You replied looking up into his eyes.

“You’re forgiven.” He added with a smooth voice before you felt his lips meet yours. You were surprised at how soft they felt, and you had just found out he could do such a thing. He probably didn’t do it every day, but he was such a good kisser, you were dazzled by the kiss before he pulled out of it.

“Now open up dove, we’re not done just yet.” He grinned.

He hadn’t finished his sentence that you had opened your mouth, eagerly awaiting him.

“My god you’re such a good little slut.” He laughed not able to contain himself any longer, he pushed himself deep into your mouth and moaned loudly as he did so, you started moving your head swallowing his member to the base each time.

You hadn’t noticed because of how gradual it had been, but Alastor was now moving much faster than how he had started, hitting your deepest parts each time.

“Are you going to come again and prove me right?” Alastor smirked at you, pausing his thrusting for a moment and spanking your ass roughly. You moaned loudly around Vox’s cock and stopped moving as he immediately grabbed your head and kept the thrusting going.

“Nuh uh, you can’t stop yet.” The TV demon said as he kept pumping in and out of your mouth.

You looked at Alastor from the corner of your eye.

“What is it sweetheart? The TV got your tongue?” He spanked you again this time harder. Your pussy tightened around him, and he felt it, making his grin widen even more.

You looked at him trying your hardest to stay in control.

“Aww you still think you can decide whether you come or not. How adorable…I guess it’s time I teach you this lesson.” He squinted his eyes challengingly before he spanked you one last time, harder than all the other time, this time immediately grabbing both of your ass cheeks very firmly, not breaking eye contact with you.

“I…” He slammed you against his cock. “…decide…” He slammed harder. “…if…” He slammed even harder, digging his nails into your ass. “…and when…” He slammed hard and you felt yourself dangerously close to the edge. “…you come!” He grinned, slamming one last time harder than you had ever felt him thrust in you and he saw your eyes roll back as your pussy started pulsating around his cock. You moaned loudly around Vox’s cock, who pulled out just in time to hear it aloud. You were panting hard, your whole body going limp.

Vox grabbed your face and pressed your cheeks together bringing his face close to yours. “You’ll relax soon enough bitch, but we’re not done yet.” He then proceeded to grab you off Alastor and prop you once again on all fours. You were wobbly at best. “Come on are you already exhausted? After all this big talk?” He spanked you now red ass making you whine. You moaned softly and looked at him with pleading eyes. Your legs felt weak from all this thrusting and climaxing, and he could tell. He let out a soft sigh.

“Here. Let me give you a hand.” He grabbed one of your legs and propped it on his shoulder. “Now you’re going to take it like a good girl?” He looked at you his eyes focusing intensely on you.

“Yes, Sir.” You pleaded. As soon as he heard those words coming out of your mouth he felt an irrepressible urge to take you and you felt all of him enter you once more, at this point your pussy being overstimulated felt so sensitive everything felt ten times more intense. You moaned loudly while your tongue hung out of your mouth, and you gripped the sheets tightly as Vox started thrusting more roughly than he previously had.

Alastor, seeing your tongue hanging and your mouth open, took this opportunity to push himself inside your mouth and started thrusting.

“Enjoy your own taste dear, because you’re about to taste me.” He declared with a sadistic gaze on his now flushed face. You loved seeing the evolution of his boldness as lust took over.

“Shit you’re so fucking tight!” Vox thrusted hard, gritting his teeth, and digging his nails into your thigh, pulling it close against his chest as he lost himself in pleasure, his movement becoming more erratic as he glitched and he brought himself closer to the final release, nevertheless, he never failed to hit your G-spot with each thrust. You felt it coming, despite your best efforts, they both felt you tense up more and more. You still did a great job wrapping your tongue around the radio demon’s shaft, you heard his breath get shakier as he maintained composure fucking your mouth, one hand under your chin and the other in your hair.

You felt the knot about to snap as you hear them both declare as one:

“Are you ready?”

They both thrusted deep in you one last time, releasing simultaneously, filling you up from both sides as you came one last time, almost seeing stars at this point.

Alastor let out the closest thing to a moan as he emptied himself directly down your throat tightening around his member, slowly pulling himself out afterwards and enjoying the sight of your dazed expression.

“Good job.” He patted your cheek smiling and slightly panting, much more relaxed than a few moments ago.

Vox pulled out next and you immediately collapsed onto the bed, cum flowing out of you.

“Holy shit you felt so fucking good!” Vox also felt all sorts of dizzy after his orgasm. He quickly got a grip and they both grabbed what was necessary to clean you up, laying you down comfortably after Alastor removed his bowtie from your sore wrists and Vox handed you one of his shirts to wear.

You were fast asleep and woke up probably a few hours later to both of them having tea in the corner of the room.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, you can’t talk your way into being better in bed, she literally blacked out after I made her come, that’s how good it was.” Expressed Vox with frustration.

“Maybe that or you were just so boring she fell asleep.” Replied Alastor calmly sipping his tea.

“Fuck off, weren’t you facefucking her as well? Wouldn’t that make you boring by extension?” He proclaimed, anger taking over his tone.

Alastor ignored him. You moved in the bed making it creak and earning their attention.

“Oh, looks like our friend has finally awaken from her great slumber.” Announced the radio demon.

They both arrived by your side as you fully came to.

“Hello beautiful.” Exclaimed Vox, with his usual smile and composure. “How are we doing?”

“Well!” You replied attempting to stretch then realizing how sore your whole body felt. “Never mind.” You added.

They both smiled with a satisfied look on their face, almost as if admiring their work.

“Yeah, you need to rest. Next time try not to bite off more than you can chew sweetheart.” Declared Vox with Alastor nodding approvingly next to him.

“Any idea who performed best this time Dear?” Asked the radio demon.

“I mean, it’s hard to give you an answer when you both do whatever you want at all times.” You said with a hint of frustration. “Maybe if you both stuck to one hole, I would be able to tell.” You added, genuinely trying to recall all the events in the right order.

“Hmm, No.”

“Nope.” They both proclaimed simultaneously.

“We will, however, keep fucking you until you give us an answer.” Gloated Vox with a hint of excitement in his voice.

“I’m afraid it’s the only way.” Added Alastor calmly.

“Fair.” You conceded.

‘Holy shit what did I get myself into…’ You thought to yourself.

“Now, rest my dear, you’re going to need it.” Said Vox still smiling at you before vanishing into electricity out of the room.

“I’ll see you soon Darling.” Declared Alastor before smiling and disappearing into a shadow.

To be continued...

Vox is genuinely so effortless to write. I love how versatile he can be, Alastor on the other hand is rough -.- but once I'm done I can fully appreciate it.

PS : I know Alastor is Aroace and I hope no one takes offense to my work. I genuinely take pleasure in writing smuts and I've been loving his personality that's all.

Peace out ! o/

[enbycrip]

I’ve not been posting about various stuff I’ve been doing over the last few weeks for various reasons - partially sheer exhaustion, partially a sort of weird holdover of “not wanting to go on about things because that’s performative” thing, partially that, tbh, much of the time when I’m posting I’m so *tired* that dragging complicated things about my own life out is so emotionally taxing and difficult that posting about them feels like a spoon hit I don’t have the capacity available to absorb.

But that’s probably not helpful. So here we are. Post One is going to be about the rehab programme because that’s been one of the main focuses of my time and energy since November.

I’m in the last week of my initial free 12-week chronic joint pain rehab programme at Nuffield Health, which has meant free membership there with specific classes which include exercise and also a whole bunch of advice on things that are supposed to affect pain. I’ve found it - complex but overall positive?

- It’s a rolling programme so when I first joined I was with a whole bunch of older women near the end of their programmes. That was really difficult for gender reasons, feeling maybe this wasn’t aimed at me at all etc etc. It became much more positive as they rolled off and a much more diverse group of folk in gender and age rolled on with me, and I’m honestly going to miss my peers in this. I’m still the youngest in the group, and I’ve not talked about gender in it because honestly that’s spoon-heavy, but it’s been a lot less difficult genderfeels-wise than I initially feared. I have been wearing my pronoun badges at least. I’d love some more Pride and non-binary-specific gym gear - please feel free to link any you know out there from ethical companies; I suspect a lot of it may be beyond my price range, but saving up exists.

- My initial health check showed I had put on a *lot* more weight than I thought, so I’ve been doing my best to utterly revamp my diet and how much sugar I was eating in particular as a maladaptive way to manage fatigue. My next health check is on Thursday after my last class and I’m trying *really* hard not to hope that I’ve lost tons of the weight because a) weight is not an indicator of health or worth b) I’ve been doing a LOT of weights work over that time and it’s entirely possible I’ve acquired a lot more muscle. This would be a very good thing. Trying to manage all of this and getting to a better way of eating with the old ED demon on my shoulder has been *complex* AF tbh. I do actually really need to thank person-centred therapy, many years in the disabled community in general, and FatDoctor and other people in the fat-positive community, esp the trans part, for this not fucking up my head more than it has. I should probably drop my old therapist a personal email to thank her for the help she was to me on this - is that a weird thing for an ex-patient to do? Does that cross boundaries?

- The “general advice on things that are supposed to reduce pain” bit was a barrier for me because it brings up so much trauma about pain clinics and other medical BS about pain over the last decade plus. The fact that it’s ten minutes before exercise has helped; not enough time to build up anger and then physical activity to release it. It’s also helped that we’ve had a lot of group discussions and almost everyone there is chronically ill or chronically injured so it’s been sharing experiences of the genuine systemic life problems that come with that and a *lot* of discussions about how unhelpful the wider medical system has been. Patient solidarity is helpful. Who’d have thunk it? 😜

- I’ve had to *keep* fighting my own “ADHD extremes” personality tendencies all the way through this, as I have through much of the last decade plus. I am *bad* at not throwing myself at things I’m trying to really engage with, y’all. I am *bad* at sensible moderation. It’s not how my brain works at *all*. But I’ve only had one sublaxion and one POTS collapse in the entire programme, and I am fucking proud of myself for that.

- That notwithstanding, this has been A Lot, esp as one of the classes is on a Thursday, the day I see my brother. I don’t talk about him on social media a lot because he is nonspeaking and can’t consent to me sharing stuff about him, but getting weekly contact with him again has been incredibly important to me, and to him, from what he has communicated to me. It’s also high-energy and sometimes exhausting, when he is having a particularly high-energy day, or a tough day, and means cleaning up afterwards. Given how often much less high-energy social contact just kicks the shit out of me, I’m really proud that I’ve missed very few days with him, but it has been *exhausting*. I have spent every Wednesday and most weekends since starting the programme entirely in bed, just crawling to the bathroom, and even with that I am *still* just bone-deep exhausted right now, though I think some of that is still fallout from the *great* weekend away we went to for a friend’s 50th a fortnight ago, of which I *still* spent much too much time in bed.

- I think that, no matter how hard I tried not to, I let myself somewhat entertain the idea that this programme might utterly transform my health if I put enough work into it. Because no matter how hard I try not to, it’s *difficult* not to get sucked into the prevailing medical orthodoxy about fatigue disorders that a big part of the fatigue is “deconditioning” and fixing that will fix the fatigue. Instead, I’m doing a thing that is genuinely helping my mobility but any effect on fatigue levels is very much on the “increasing” scale than otherwise, despite the level of pacing involved (which is the only thing that lets me do anything at all). So after the classes end I am going to be in the space where I need to keep on doing this to keep the mobility improvements and the long-term effects on my health (particularly re reducing my huge osteoporosis risk) and that is going to be *tough*. Some of it will help, esp re the flexibility to pace around other things I’m doing, but making sure I *keep* doing this when it’s going to mean keeping on having to ask my dad for lifts to the gym and the level of exhaustion involved is going to be *tough*. Going to do my best to keep up with other group people there in the hope that will help.

- Doing this at a time when, frankly, Labour is increasing attacks on disability support is extra-scary. I am *really* afraid any improvements in mobility etc will be read as “well you’re cured then” as opposed to “you’re improving prospects for your longer term health and increasing your capacities in certain ways but the work it takes to do and maintain that has at best huge knock-on effects on the energy, including the cognitive energy, available to do anything else with”. The proposed cuts to Access To Work mean any work I can ever get is even more going to have to be remote, which is scary too. The way disability is continually viewed in such zero-sum, capitalist-centered ways continues to just sap my energy across the board, and I’ve got so little to start with.

[cultkinkcoven]

Ritual Report: Wednesday July 26, 2023

My glorious and profound Father Lucifer, I thank you humbly for this marvellous experience as well as your permission to share this experience with my peers. You are infinite in your loving grace and wisdom. I revere you deeply and truly. Thank you, bless you. 🖤

“My Ritual with Lord Lucifer was fucking Amazing

I didn’t truly understand what everyone meant when they say that the Marvellous Light Bringer is beautiful and gracious beyond comprehension before this ritual. It’s been a day and I am still absolutely shaken and awe inspired. Ave the wonderful prince of darkness, Lord Lucifer. 🖤

Ritual with Lucifer (Holy Shit) (1)

Okay guys I’m not trying to be dramatic, seriously. I’m just super ?!??? aaaa ?? after the ritual I just did? But in a really great way. I just need to get this out and write this down because I’m ??? so happy? ? aa

I didn’t consider myself to be a Luciferian, but I’ve been reaching out to Lucifer for a little bit now, nothing super intense but I have definitely felt his presence and done some small offerings for him. Another spirit I work very often with is very close with Lucifer, and through him I came into contact with The Prince. I’ve worked a lot with other angels but I’ve only really started dabbling with Lucifer within the last year. He’s been good to me. Whatever whatever, just context.

I wanted to do something a little deeper, really get a solid good connection. Honestly, I just wanted to get to know him better. I’ve been thinking about him very often, seeing him in dreams. The energy in my room almost called for it. Idk.

A mutual of mine who also works with Lucifer suggested I try meditating with an enn. I’ve been meeting an unusually high number of people who also work with Lucifer within the past few weeks and they’re always sharing awesome resources I’ve never seen. As soon as I start thinking about him long enough I’ll see something that I could use to work with him. I recently went to a trip to Nelson BC and picked up these Hermetic Tarot Cards. Also came to find out that the town has a SUSPICIOUS amount of occult imagery (and a Freemason temple? very cool.)

Life is one funny motherfucker.

I think it’s worth noting that before I started this ritual, when I was writing up invocations for him, I drew a card out of a box of oracle cards that reads “become willing to see the innocence in that which you condemn” which I found very baffling at the time because I was grappling with nerves around the ritual. I’m like a full time witch so I usually don’t get the jitters in rituals. Angels usually never make me nervous, and Lucifer in no way scares me. I don’t at all see him as an evil scary thing, quite the opposite, but I was raised extremely Christian so it’s ingrained in me. I was just having that split second satanic panic thing. I think that’s important to acknowledge. Lovely shadow work exposing my deep prejudices and insecurities :)

I began the ritual by drawing his sigil on the desk in white chalk. I had already prepared a candle carved with the sigil. I like to use this card from the Goetic Tarot whenever I do rituals with Lucifer because the artwork is so stunning. This was also the first time I was using these Hermetic Tarot cards and they were wonderful, probably one of my favourite decks now.

After some meditative exercises and prayers I layer back on the floor and listened to music for a while. I do all my rituals like this naked. I like to listen to classical music when I’m preparing to go into a trance because it tickles my brain and is easy to ride. Gets all the goo out? I don’t know.

After a while of that I switched it to the enns…

So, the Enns…

I started with Lucifer’s Enn by Demonic Enn. It filled my chest. It was powerful and intimidating and my heart was pounding. It was overwhelming for me. What I felt in it was power, but not the Lucifer I’m familiar with I guess. A different aspect of Lucifer that is mighty and strong but unfamiliar. Not my Lucifer.

((Honestly the instrumentals are top tier and I really could feel it’s power but the dude’s voice just threw me off. I’m sorry I don’t know if we’re allowed to leave reviews on enns but it just wasn’t my favourite.))

It scrambled the fuck out of me and it made me nervous again. I started to doubt myself and wondered if I was making a mistake. I know that sounds stupid but I was caught in the adrenaline. What if the Lucifer I’ve felt all this time isn’t what I thought? I know that everyone experiences him differently, but what if I’m reaching out to someone I don’t really understand? I know Lord Lucifer is an extremely powerful entity and I don’t wanna fuck around and do something stupid, yknow?

I sat for a moment and then asked my deck the first question of the ritual. “What advice can you give me to continue this ritual? Am I making a mistake?”

I got this Nine of Swords, Lord of Despair and Cruelty.

“The Nine of Swords suggests that dark thoughts and disturbing feelings are weighing you down. You are worrying excessively about a situation, and your negative thoughts are getting the better of you, leaving you stressed and anxious. The more you associate with your fears, the more they will rule your life. The fear and worry in the Nine of Swords can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. As you obsess over what may go wrong, you are more likely to manifest your worst-case scenario.”

I was freaking myself out, and I needed to calm down. The jitters were holding me back and I needed to regain focus. Stop being a little bitch, basically. And idk… as soon as I read that card, I was calm again, and the energy felt warm. He needed me to preserve. I was safe with him, and he was guiding me through the darkness. If he is the Lucifer I know him to be, he will guide me well.

I tried one more enn which was Lucifer’s Enn by Carl Spartacus. Beautiful.

This is the most vivid trance I have ever been in. Like holy shit. I don’t know how best to describe this without sounding totally crazy. My body completely relaxed as I fell into the music. My face got warm, I felt embrace around my shoulders and chest. As soon as it began I saw a warm light emerge from the darkness behind my eyes. The familiar energy of the Lucifer I’ve come to know emerged. I felt close to him like I always had, it was like he was standing right before me. Like he could just reach out and touch me.

I emerged in shrubbery, I was surrounded by trees and bushes. As I turned to look into the clearing I saw a magnificent illuminating light. The energy was rich, so heavy I could reach out and grab it. I felt warmth blanket my entire body, and I began to drift from the ground and float towards him. If I didn’t know any better Id fucking swear I was levitating in the real world. It felt that real. His energy elevated and touched every part of my body and filled it with absolute bliss. There were others there, naked men and women surrounding him and singing, floating around him with laughter and glee. We were in a large stretch of field now, prancing around like children, the drum of his energy pounding like thunder and lifting us into the air. I didn’t know these people, if they were spirits or humans, but we were all in love with each other. We held hands and swung each other around. We were all so happy to be together.

Lucifer was a tall masculine energy with long black hair and deep, gentle, wise black eyes. Like all the others he was naked and seemed to glow. He took us all up and we drifted among the clouds. He danced with us, his smile was light itself.

This was all so vivid. I could feel the wind and heat on my skin. I got butterflies as we drifted. I actually felt like I was floating. Honestly I was high on it, maybe I still am.

And then, I felt my body sit forward, and I returned to our world. The candle which I had carved Lucifer’s sigil on stood tall and I could feel him within the flame. He whispered for me to come closer. It was then that I heard his voice. His smooth, gentle, careful voice. It was a whisper that washed over me like mist. Had I not been in such a high state of mind it would have scared the shit out of me.

He said in great vividness “Why have you come before me?” (Deal time!!!)

I replied simply that I wanted to know him. I said that I could not worship him, for I must worship myself. I seek him not for religion but because I have great love and reverence for him. Through magick we can connect and come to know each other. I hope only that he can show me how to be more like him. Powerful and dominant, warm and protective. He is beautiful, illuminating knowledge and purity. I want nothing more than to know him as one would know an old friend. Behold his energy, magnificent and splendid. May we dance together like we just did for as long as it serves us. He seemed very satisfied with that answer.

Lucifer commanded me to draw a card from the tarot deck, the question to which was essentially “will you take me as one of you kin, Lord Lucifer?”

I drew the Sun. Lord of the Fire of the World. Success, radiance and abundance. The Sun gives you strength and tells you that no matter where you go or what you do, your positive and radiant energy will follow you and bring you happiness and joy. This beautiful, warm energy is what will get you through the tough times and help you succeed.

We then spoke for a bit about fire and its ability to purify. It is a powerful force with the power to harm, but it is a mighty cleanser of impurity. He asked me to put my hand above the flame to feel it’s heat. I promised to always respect that flame. Allow it to burn away all that does not serve us, to never abuse it, to never try to control it. He kissed me on the forehead.

I was beyond happy. I offered him my smoky quarts and obsidian tower just to give him something, and when I did I saw him bow to me when he reached out to accept. I bowed back, and he bid me farewell for now. When I was finally completely out of the trance, his protective energy was still there. Actually it’s still everywhere, filling my altar. I can’t describe this feeling.

I can’t explain how rich and beautiful that energy was, how marvellous it felt to float in his orbit like that. The physical sensations were realer than reality. I’m still shaken. I feel ridiculously lucky which is a strange feeling I’ve never really had with a deity before. It’s so strong. aaa

I can’t bring myself to clean up the ritual lol.

Thanks for reading this holy fuck, I guess I’m a bit of a Luciferian now “

Ave the wondrous Lord Lucifer! ❤️🖤

[dancer-subclarington]

📲Texts: Cucumber || Briar & Kyla

Briar: Omg

Kyla: You make fun of me for saying that

Briar: Bc you say it like out loud

Briar: Girl you’re barely dancing today

Kyla: Wow, thanks

Briar: Someone cant walk

Kyla: Ugh

Briar: Im right

Kyla: So?

Briar: IM RIGHT!

Briar: Good for you

Briar: You could have sex more than once in a blue moon ya know. I wouldn’t tell anyone

Kyla: You’d just torture me about it

Briar: Torture can be fun, little K

Kyla: Get your mind out of the gutter

Briar: Nah. Call me a tmnt

Kyla: They live in sewers

Briar: Dork

Kyla: I have 3 brothers!

Briar: Or maybe you watch cartoons with guys after sex

Kyla: Shut up

Briar: Im right again

Kyla: Nope

Briar: Ooh wait was it a girl? Did you get pegged?

Kyla: No

Briar: Cuz like Im not into the gay sex thing but come on, that’s kinda hot

Kyla: I said no

Briar: So you’re a hot talented bisexual bitch and you’re not getting pegged? What a waste!

Kyla: Jesus Christ

Briar: Do you say that during sex?

Kyla: You’re the one always talking about sex. Maybe you need to get some.

Briar: Babygirl

Briar: That’s really cute

Kyla: Thanks

Kyla: How many are you dating rn?

Briar: Not dating.

Kyla: How many are you seeing then?

Briar: Like 17. You?

Kyla: Less than 17

Briar: You’re no fun!

Briar: No numbers then. Names. 3 of them.

Briar: Besides Annabeth

Briar: Lmao its taking you so long to think of 3

Briar: At least tell me who made your fan kick look so atrocious

Kyla: Elliott

Briar: Boy?

Kyla: Yes

Briar: Mark?

Kyla: Sub

Briar: How scandalous for you!

Kyla: It was for an exam

Briar: Intriguing. Two subs have sex during an exam for which class exactly?

Kyla: Pretty sure it was home ec. We were making a salad.

Briar: And the ?

Kyla: Um and then we were not making a salad. And then we were really not making a salad

Briar: Good girl. You should get your guts fucked out of you more

Kyla: You and my dad care more about my sex life than I do

Kyla: Stop typing, you demon

Briar: Ok. I’ll just sit here and decide what kind of details I’ll make up to tell the adult class.

Briar: Salads..cucumbers.

Kyla: He didn’t need a cucumber

Briar: Because he had a dick that big?

Kyla: Lets just say it wasn’t lacking.

Kyla: Lets also just tell the adult class I am injured from wrestling a coyote.

Briar: You told them that when you were in the chastity belt in locktober. Now remind me..did you enjoy that?

Kyla: Briar.

Briar: Idk I feel like you were super cranky during that month

Kyla: Briar

Briar: And then you signed up for extra classes and privates and choreography sessions and then you dragged me into some of them and now my costumes are backordered

Kyla: You’re just now ordering costumes? I’ve had my orders in for a couple months

Briar: Good job not reminding me

Kyla: I tried to but you were with some guy in Bora Bora

Briar: So wait a week and try again!

Kyla: Belize. Or was it Bali?

Briar: I was doing an alphabet challenge and got B so I did Bora Bora, Bali, Belize, and Brazil. And had more sex than you’ve had in your whole life.

Kyla: I have sex!

Briar: Who besides Annabeth and this Elliott person? Oh and Betsy.

Kyla: She was super fun. I miss her.

Kyla: There’s lots of hot guys here though. And girls. Some of them like stuff I don’t like but Im forcing exposure to those things so I can like them.

Briar: Its not a theatre exercise

Kyla: ?

Briar: You don’t train in sex things you don’t like. There’s no reason to

Kyla: You’re not even at an academy, what do you know?

Kyla: You’d be proud of me anyway. I’ve taken plenty of classes that would be Briar approved

Briar: Do tell

Kyla: Nope

Briar: Unfair

Kyla: You let your students work on their numbers and have no costumes for them. Thats unfair.

Briar: Ok but this is unfair too

Kyla: You’ll live.

Briar: Maybe

Kyla: I’ll take your teen class on Tuesday if you’ve stopped existing.

Briar: Ugh, take them anyway.

Kyla: Then you take my minis.

Briar: Fine. They’re easy.

Kyla: They’re hard to please. And they can’t point their toes.

Briar: Teens have attitude

Kyla: Yeah but I have practice with teens bc I have you and your little horny mindset

Briar: And you give me practice with minis bc you whine and pout a lot

Kyla: Yw!

Briar: I need more info on this Elliott person.

Kyla: Don’t get excited ok? He’s claimed.

Briar: And his claim let him scene with you?

Kyla: Yes. It took special permission and everything.

Briar: Really? Did it require a demonstration 😜

Kyla: No you moron. I made it up. Im not sure if he even asked. But I totally would’ve made the cut cuz Im flexible.

Briar: Yes you are. Now tell me..what exactly do you do with that superpower?

Kyla: Lots of things.

Briar: Like?

Kyla: Use your imagination

Kyla: I take it back. Do not use your imagination.

Kyla: I can feel you imagining things

Briar: But you don’t know how to have that much fun.

Kyla: You know about me that I like coming and that I like dance and cheer. So. In combination, I enjoy myself.

Briar: What were you doing when he fucked you so hard?

Kyla: Keeping one foot on the floor at all times cuz Im always a super safe person

Briar: No you’re not!

Briar: You just sent my imagination wild

Kyla: Have fun with that

Kyla: Never mind DO NOT HAVE FUN WITH THAT, NO FUN FOR YOU

[zeldan7]

Overworked - Mammon Fluff (Mammon x GN! Reader)

For @jaered19 - I'm so sorry I've taken so long to write this! I got a new job and I've been so busy with it I've had very little free time! I hope it's worth the wait :)

Pairing: Mammon x GN! Reader

Warnings: Graphic/in-depth panic attack - please don't read if this will trigger you

Word Count: 897

You sat at your desk, a mountain of work surrounding you. Your D.D.D. sat in the centre on speakerphone, Lucifer barking at you through it.

“The test is tomorrow, Y/N. You’d better be prepared for it, because I haven’t seen you do anything.”

“Yes, Lucifer,” You sighed, desperately trying to keep it together. You were stressed enough as it was without Lucifer yelling at you.

“And you’re behind on work for all your classes! This isn’t a holiday, Y/N, you’re here as a student. If you continue to underperform Lord Diavolo will send you back to the human realm.”

Tears began to spill over your eyelids. “Yes, Lucifer,”

“Oh, also, I need you to write a report on your time and experiences in the Devildom by the end of the week.” He paused, clearly expecting a response. The lack of one infuriated him. “Y/N? Y/N, are you listening to me?!”

You smashed the button to hang up before collapsing on your desk, sobbing. Why was Lucifer being so unfair? Why give you more work when you were behind as it is? Your breath hitched and you realised you needed some air; now. Standing, you turned to the window, vision blurring. The tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and it was becoming harder to breathe. He couldn’t take you away from all the people you’d come to love, he couldn’t… Could he? You took a single step before pitching forwards, scattering your work across the room. You fell to the floor, ears roaring and vision darkening. You tried to remember your breathing exercises, but the thoughts became jumbled and you ended up hyperventilating harder. Curling into a ball, you thought you were going to faint. Through your racing mind, one thought was prominent. You need to call for help. Except your D.D.D. was too far away. You sobbed louder, throat burning and constricting all at once.

“Mammon,” You gasped.

You weren’t quite sure how, but suddenly the white-haired demon was kneeling in front of you.

“Y/N? Y/N, what’s wrong?” Panic flashed across his face as he saw you choking on your own breaths. “Let me get Lucifer,”

“No!” You cried, lunging towards Mammon.

You knocked his D.D.D. out of his hand by accident and winced as you heard it shatter on the floor. Mammon’s face went through a variety of emotions, starting with shock, then sadness, and finally settling on fury.

“What the fuck did ya do that for?!”

You scooted away from him, sobbing even harder. He’d never hurt you, he’d never hurt you, he’d never hurt you. In your panicked state, the thoughts wouldn’t quite get into your brain, and you found yourself feeling terrified. This had been a mistake. You’d pried Mammon away from whatever he was doing and you’d punished his concern for you by destroying hid D.D.D. Your gasps were quick and shallow, and you were certain you were going to pass out as darkness clouded your vision.

Suddenly, Mammon’s demeanour changed. “Hey, hey, Y/N,” his voice was soft, soothing. “Look at me, Y/N.”

Slowly, you brought your gaze up to look into his eyes, expecting wrath and hatred, but meeting only warmth and concern. The broken D.D.D. lay on the floor behind him, all but forgotten. Gently, he took your trembling hands into his own, circling the backs of yours with his thumbs.

“Breathe with me, Y/N.” He demanded, authoritative yet tender.

You complied, slowly feeling yourself begin to calm down.

After a fair few minutes had passed, Mammon took you by the hand, helping you up and leading you to the window. He opened it with one hand, keeping his other holding yours, and the cool night air washed over you. It felt good. Really good. As the refreshing breeze caressed your clammy skin you felt your nerves subside. Of course this big softie of a demon would never hurt you, how could you even think such a thing? Mammon glanced at you, clearly feeling the change in your presence.

“Wanna tell me what’s up?” He asked, thumb still tracing circles on your hand.

You let out a deep breath. “Lucifer – I – I’m just extremely overwhelmed.”

You explain how much work you have and how Lucifer keeps hounding you. To your surprise, Mammon just stands and listens silently.

When you finish, he doesn’t immediately respond, deep in thought.

“If ya let me…” he clears his throat, finally speaking up. “I’d really like to talk to Lucifer about this; get him to ease up on ya a little.”

You shake your head. “No… if he’s expecting me to do it then I should be able to.”

Mammon takes your face in his hands and you feel yourself melt – just a little. “Y/N, you’re too hard on yourself. Lucifer needs to know he’s given ya too much to handle.”

Begrudgingly, you nod. “Maybe you’re right – but it’s not like he’d listen.”

A huge grin appears on your demon’s face. “Leave that to The Great Mammon!”

You can’t help but smile as he pulls you in for a hug, kissing the top of your head.

“It’ll be okay, Y/N. I got ya,”

And even though you weren’t sure it would work, you couldn’t help but notice Lucifer was ever so slightly more lenient with your deadlines. Not that his pride would let him admit that The Great Mammon had persuaded him, but you had a feeling.

[obeiii-mee]

Heyo, this is my first time asking (im kinda new to tumblr, so please dont judge) if you would'nt mind, could you do some headcannons (or oneshots, it dosen't matter) with all the demon bros and a MC who is crippled/paralized in their legs, and has to use a wheelchair to get around? Thank you!!

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This is the first time I’ve written about a crippled MC, so I hope I didn’t fuck this up or anything. I found out that being paralysed in both legs is a disability called Paraplegia so that’s how I titled this post. And y’all are too sweet, you are more than welcome anon! I hope I can portray this properly because I am not crippled myself so I’ve opted to do some research before writing this! I hope you like it! Also, I feel inclined to add that none of the brothers would treat you too differently if you happen to have a disability because you’re their human nonetheless :)

——————————-

The Brothers with an MC that has Paraplegia and needs a wheelchair to get around:

Lucifer:

-Lucifer was in charge of choosing the final human, exchange student for the program so it’s guaranteed he already knew about your predicament before you even arrived

-Him and Diavolo probably had many meetings concerning your disability before the program could commence, considering that being unable to walk would double the chances of you getting killed since you are obviously more vulnerable

-Not to mention all the treatment you would require

-Lucifer is not well versed in human illnesses and disorders, but he makes sure that he is educated enough on the matter before you get brought down there

-It would not be easy, but he is determined to help you survive your year in DevilDom for the prince’s sake

-First problem of the day was, of course, your wheelchair

-Due to lack of time, Lucifer was unable to instal ramps around the House of Lamentation which meant that for the first couple of weeks, someone would’ve had to help you move around certain parts of the house

-He gave that highly prestigious job to himself because he didn’t trust his brothers and thought they would accidentally drop you and your wheelchair down the stairs

-He talks a lot to you, even at the beginning, because he needs to establish your needs and what he should do to make sure you don’t die for the following year

-You would have to tell him about physical therapy and how most commonly it uses heat, massage and exercise to stimulate your nerves and muscles, making it a great treatment for people with leg paralysis

-Once you two enter a more intimate and personal relationship, it’s more than likely he’ll help you perform those things himself (instead of kidnapping a human doctor from somewhere)

-Lucifer knows you have no problem getting around with your wheelchair by yourself but there are times where he’ll insist to push you along in order to give you a quick break

-I can totally imagine you two strolling around DevilDom and having cosy chats about RAD and your adjustments to DevilDom

-He has a softer side to him that he’s afraid to show most of the time, but he feels so at ease when you’re around, it’s hard for him to hold that part of him hidden from you

-Of course, your safety still remains his primary concern and he acts more like your guardian than Mammon does, even if he was originally supposed to look out for you

-He will accompany you almost anywhere. And if he can’t, he’ll have one or more of his brothers do it. And even then he’s probably lurking nearby, just in case

-He would always be willing to listen about your condition, if you wished to tell him whether you were born with the defect or why you ended up crippled later in life. Either way, he’s all ears

-If you would rather not speak about it, he wouldn’t pry and respect your decision because he knows it’s not his place to pressure you

-Because of your paralysis, it’s quite obvious to demons that you are even weaker (physically speaking) than most humans and that usually puts a target on your back

-Howver, never fear, because Lucifer is pretty quick to put lower rank demons in their place with just a mere stare

-Oop one of them passed out from the fear, haha

-In conclusion, he’s the most responsible when it comes your comfort and safety during your stay

-He makes sure you are always left in good hands and and provides most of the requirements you need

-Y’all should see how his wings puff up when he senses a threat approaching you, he looks like a peacock ready to go on attack lol

Mammon:

-The second born is unsurprisingly a bit of a jerk at first

-He stays really grumpy the whole day of your arrival because he’s stuck babysitting you stupid human

-“Lucifer c’mon, what’s all this workload for? The human can’t even walk by themselves, why do I have to help them out?”

-Wtf Mammon you can’t say shit like that

-Anyways, the following very few days, the only thing he’s thinking about is how much money he could sell your wheelchair for

-He’s the literal incarnation of greed, what else did you expect from him?

-After a while, he starts feeling a bit guilty every time he thinks about it though

-Mammon is gonna take this secret to the grave (laughs in immortal) but he actually really likes pushing you around

-Maybe it’s because it’s a clear indication to everyone around him that you are HIS human, under HIS protection and therefore you trust HIM the most since he was your FIRST MAN

-He will insist on helping you get out of that thing when you need to go to bed and stuff every night and he will get pouty real fast if you let any of his other brothers do it

-You wake up to him trying to roll around in your wheelchair one night at like 3am

-At some point, he stole a wheelchair from the human realm to match with his human. You can guess the consequences of his actions

-I can imagine you having to face a staircase or something at school and Mammon being like:

-“Fuck it, imma carry this fragile human instead; wheelchair and all!”

-Like you were a sack of potatoes or something smh

-Cue his brothers watching him from a distance as he heaves you and basically weight-lifts you up the stairs

-Ok but every now and again, he gets so sad thinking about you not being able to walk, like he starts crying kinda sad

-While you stand there like 😐 “Why are you crying?”

-He’s so quick to help if he senses you’re in danger too

-It’s canon that Mammon is crazy fast if he wants to be so if he has even the slightest impression that your life is threatened, his feet are already moving

-He will charge at your immediate threat at around 120 miles per hour-do not try him when he’s mad

-“The Great Mammon saved the day! C’mon MC, let’s go buy some ice cream. My treat! Ya better be grateful!”

-He says while the demon that tried to eat you lies on the floor with about a dozen broken bones

-Mammon is the second most powerful demon out of all of his brothers, even if he doesn’t resort to violence often

Levi:

-He didn’t really know how to react when you first teleported to DevilDom

-I mean, from the very beginning he considered you to be a human normie but at the same time, he felt bad you were stuck with his brothers for the rest of the year

-I think he would understand you would have an even harder time integrating yourself in their house because of your disability and he knows his siblings are really fucking annoying, always pushing you around and whatnot

-So, he kinda lets you hide in his room quite often

-You guys chill out in there all the time, much to the dismay of the other brothers who also want to spend time with you

-At some point, Levi definitely begged asked Lucifer to let you start online classes with him

-“But wouldn’t it be easier for MC to do online school from home rather than go to R.A.D since there aren’t any ramps or anything around there???”

-“The answer is no Leviathan.”

-“Ugh fine! What a fucking boomer-“

-For some reason, he gets so flustered whenever you ask him to push you around

-He blushes right to the tips of his ears and then he starts sputtering some nonsense that you can’t make out at all

-But he’s more than happy to do it, especially if you guys are going to a convention or if he’s dragging you out to buy new merch

-You two would get along in the sense that Levi realises the struggles you faced all your life were tough to overcome and he believes you are just like him

-Usually left out by other people, ignored even

-He knows you always listen to him ramble on about whatever he is currently obsessed with and how much you check up on him to make sure he never isolated himself

-He wants to do that for you too! Talk to him about your hobbies, please I’m begging you-he feels so bad whenever he’s doing all the talking

-If you ask him to help you with anything (getting something, helping you into bed—that sort of thing), he legally and physically can’t say ‘no’

-And he would get envious enough to stop talking to you for a day or two if you let his brothers do it instead (the second and third born are indeed similar lmao)

-S T A Y I N H I S R O O M, W H E R E Y O U C A N B E P R O T E C T E D !

-He will feel so much more at ease if you’re in his room because to him, that’s his haven

-If you’re in there with him, that means you’re not getting involved in his siblings’ endless and dangerous shenanigans

-Whenever you’re at school, he can’t help but worry about your well-being

-Because you’re human! You’re gonna get killed!! Do you know how much your organs sell on the black market in DevilDom??? 100x more than in the human realm, that’s for sure

-Would they have a black market or would it be a regular market lol

-For some reason, he also likes staying in your wheelchair when you’re not using it

-I think he just takes comfort in knowing it’s something that belongs to you and smells like you and-

-OK Levi, sit back down

-He wouldn’t treat you any differently if you had a disability tbh, but he’d be more concerned because you can’t even run away or anything

-So he’s so fuckin’ relieved when you guys are just vibing in his room

-He could die happy knowing he kept his best friend/ partner safe

Satan:

-Satan would be even more prepared for your arrival than Lucifer would, in a sense

-Out of all of his brothers, he’s most likely to understand and recognise paraplegia (either from studying human illnesses/birth defects/disabilities or from encountering humans with said disability)

-He’s a smart boy, alright?

-Always seems to be the first to notice if you need help or if someone’s bothering you

-Though in the very beginning, he was pretty tempted to just let you get killed to see how angry Lucifer could get

-Seeing dear Luci’s misery brings him great joy 🥰🥰🥰

-Once you two manage to build a very honest and strong relationship, he feels more and more inclined to keep you out of harm’s way

-Pls, he would feel so honoured if you let him push you around (it’s like you asked him to h*ld h*nds or something)

-If you require treatment of any kind, he would be so happy to help

-But in a subtle way...?

-Satan makes it seem so smooth too like he doesn’t mind lending a helping hand when in reality he’s all giddy inside

-*Kinda wants to rub it in his brothers’ faces but at the same no, because he’s definitely the bigger person here

-He wants to know how your wheelchair works

-It’s got all of these neat mechanisms and he wants to learn how they’re constructed because he never had the chance to inspect one before

-He’s such a sweetheart about asking you as well and never pries about your disability unless you start elaborating yourself

-Most of the time, he acts all charming and very gentleman-like

-So people have a hard time spotting and acknowledging the building rage inside of him every time he sees you are threatened by some moronic low rank demon

-Satan’s usually chill when it comes to injuries, unless he can see you’re in horrible pain

-There’s nothing a few spells can’t accomplish

-But when others purposefully try harming you?

-It’s like he loses all the self control he’s been trying to perfect over the centuries and he can’t help himself from at least breaking someone’s rib cage

-Satan’s a weird one because he’s protective of you even though he’s more on the relaxed side when compared to his siblings

-He very much acknowledges that you made it this far in life with your predicament so he doesn’t feel the need to baby you or anything

-You’re strong and he knows this

-It’s one of the many things he clearly loves about you

-That one time you rolled over Mammon’s foot with your wheelchair on purpose, he was wheezing

Asmo:

-Even now, he can’t help but wonder what it would be like to be stuck inside a wheelchair for the rest of his eternal life

-I mean, he’d obviously still be absolutely fabulous, have you seen him? He’s gonna be gorgeous either way

-But after the two of you meet, he definitely starts thinking about how he takes his feet for granted all the time

-It would be so difficult to complete his daily tasks without the ability to walk or run around

-That’s why he gets sad every time he remembers that’s your reality and on days like that, you’ve noticed he gives you a helluva lot more attention than usual

-He knows you don’t need pity or anything so he’s just making sure his human has all the support they can get

-Paraplegia or not, shopping trips are still a go-go

-He loves buying you clothes! And he loves helping you try them on! Asmo takes it very seriously

-Might have a go at the employees if they’re being rude to you

-You don’t even ask him to, but he subconsciously starts pushing you around himself whenever the two of you are out together

-“MC! Look at that new shop that’s just opened! Isn’t it adorable? We have to check it out!”

-He can’t help it! There’s so many places he wants to visit, he sort of just drags you with him wherever he goes

-Even at home, he always pops out of nowhere to coax you into coming to his room

-Y’all have so many skin routines to do each day

-Like he’s in your room most nights to greet you goodnight and tuck you in, with the rest of his brothers it gets so awkward at times

-Asmo just wants to see you smile, ok? He thinks you have a beautiful smile and laugh and he wants to remind you that you’re marvellous, disability or not

-And if anyone does anything to put an end to your self confidence, he will swiftly put an end to their life

-Please, he’s a pro at ruining lives, he’s been doing it for centuries

-Asmo has such a huge influence over the people in DevilDom, he just needs to make this one post on Devilgram to end said demon’s whole career

-I mean, who is he compared to him, Hmm? So don’t worry MC, scum like that don’t even deserve to breathe the same air as you :)

-That one time Mammon tried lifting you up the stairs and Asmo started shrieking, like put them down! Don’t manhandle them like that, poor human :(

Beel:

-I know I sound repetitive, but he would be an overall sweetheart to you no matter the circumstances

-If Mammon is not by your side, then Beel definitely is

-His big, scary aura and figure usually scares off any threat in a 10 mile radius

-Most demons don’t fancy being eaten by the Avatar of Gluttony, ya know?

-Idk why but I feel like he’d be the type to ask for oral consent every time he wanted to push you around

-He doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable :(

-Surprisingly also the type to lift you and your wheelchair whenever an obstacle gets in your way

-You basically weigh the same amount as a paper plate compared to him, so he has no problem doing so

-He doesn’t really understand your condition as well as Satan may do, but he’s trying his best

-You mean so much to him and he feels it’s only fair he learns more about your disability as a thank you for what you’ve done for him

-He has a rough time keeping up with you when it comes to stuff like physical therapy because he’s very unfamiliar with it but that doesn’t mean he’s not gonna help

-Of course, Beel believes that this is the second best way to show you how much he cares for you besides the obvious ‘I love you’

-Giving you a hand whenever you need his support the most

-That’s his way of saying “I’m not going to let you down. I want you to trust me, the same way I trust you.”

-And knowing him, he will try to do everything in his power to keep you safe and sound

-After a while, you’re bound to notice he’s the first one to pull you out of his brothers’ pranks before you have a chance to get hurt

-Beel is always the one handing you stuff from high places you can’t reach, without teasing you for it like Mammon might do

-Always the first one to remind you to get plenty of rest and to eat enough

-He wants to protect you and his brothers because he knows he failed to do so with Lilith so yeah, he’s a bit overprotective at times

-He doesn’t mean to be overbearing, but he gets so anxious knowing you’re by yourself

-After a few months of getting accommodated with him, your disability is no longer brought up in the conversation

-Because he doesn’t care that you are crippled and forced to use a wheelchair

-You are part of his family and he loves you no matter what

Belphie:

-He didn’t really care, even when you first met and his hatred for humans was at its very peak

-It didn’t matter that you had a disability

-All that mattered to him at the time was killing you to satisfy that deeply rooted need of vengeance inside of him

-Though he was sort of surprised his brothers didn’t get to you first

-In general, he’s pretty chill about you being crippled in both legs

-It takes too much effort to worry about your well-being 24/7 after all

-Surprisingly, he does keep an eye out for you if his siblings aren’t nearby

-It’s his redemption arc people, he’s trying to be nicer

-But he has such an irritating way of showing his affection for you

-Do not let him push you around

-He’s either going to a) fall asleep after 30 seconds and slump over you in the middle of RAD’s halls

-Or b) be annoying and fling your wheelchair in every direction possible just to piss you off

-He likes messing with you because you give him the best reactions and he thrives on that

-You’ve almost fallen off your wheelchair multiple times because of this asshole

-Not that he’d actually let you fall, he just wants to see how easily he can get you to yell at him

-Speaking of said wheelchair, like Mammon and Levi, he also loves using it when you’re not

-You’ve woken up to him curled up and asleep in that thing quiet often and he’s gotten in trouble over it every time with Lucifer

-But he doesn’t care

-And at this point, I don’t think even he knows whether he’s doing it to get a reaction out of you or because he somehow found a way to make himself comfortable there

-He would low key use you as a mode of transportation every time you go to RAD

-Just clings the damn wheelchair and almost topples both of you over

-“Belphie, there’s nothing stopping you from walking 😐”

-“Shh, just bring me to class and let me nap until then.”

-He doesn’t mention your legs but he still lays his head on your lap often

-Might make you hold him like a bride every time you stroll around the house

-It’s done out of love, I promise 😌😌

———————————

Al~

[allegedlyanandroid]

Pairing: Allen60 Prompt: Cold Types: Found Family, Fluff AU: Angels and Demons, Sixty as the little devil he is, and Allen just being human.

I am so late 😅 I wrote an entire thing before realising I hated every word of it and started over from scratch. Anyway... excuses aside, I hope you like it @yayen-chan <3 `(‾◡◝)´ 

“Okay, bookshelves first,” Allen mutters, following the intricate maze of arrows and concrete as he tries to navigate the local IKEA. “Or rugs. That works too,” he sighs when he glances up and finds himself in the wrong part of the store. Looking through the copious amounts of different rugs Allen rapidly finds himself overwhelmed. He tries reading a few of the ridiculously complicated names, stuttering over them when trying to read them out loud. “Ra- raskmol- mölle?”  

Giving up on the fifth time trying to pronounce it correctly Allen rolls the grey-and-black striped fabric up and tosses it on the cart, already dreading trying to find the rest of the items on his list. There’s only one really but when passing through the plant-section he stops to pick up a potted plant. The other one is beyond salvaging from lack of water. “Ilex, foreeneling? För-enlig. What are these names?”  

After another dead-end and some frustrated grumbling, he does find the bookshelf he needs. Honestly… this trip alone solidifies why he’s never getting a puppy. The one he took in to foster was a sweet thing but very demanding and unaware that he weighed quite a lot for a pup. He’d knocked Allen’s bookshelf over, thus breaking it, and also had an accident on his rug. If being petless meant never having to go here again then that’s a price he’s willing to pay. At least the shelter had found a family for him quickly and, while he did miss the little rascal, the puppy was undoubtedly in better hands.  

“Kallax, hemnes... gersby?”

Too caught up in his own head he doesn't notice the strange scent of warm brimstone and ash filtering through the air nor does he notice the young “man” standing behind him, a man who seemingly appeared out of thin air, until he hears the sound of a throat clearing. Allen jerks his head up from wrestling with the cardboard box and offers an apologetic smile over his shoulder. “I’ll be done in a minute.”

“Or, you could tell me why I’m here and spare me the mundane small talk you humans seem so obnoxiously fond of.”

“I’m sorry?”

The man squints. “You summoned me.”

Allen pauses to take a good look at the man. He’s tall with black, artistically tousled hair and endless amounts of freckles. A few moles are scattered across his skin and his brown eyes are filled with irritation. Dark jeans with a long-sleeved shirt tucked into it, a black overcoat ending at about mid-thigh and a purple scarf hanging unknotted around his neck. Allen thinks long and hard yet finds no recollection of ever seeing this man before in his life let alone speaking to him. “I have no idea who you are.”

“You-” the man pinches the bridge of his nose, inhales deeply and slowly let it out before starting again. “You read the incantation to evoke me and you what… didn’t even realise it?” he asks and receives nothing but a blank stare from Allen in return. “Ugh, humans.”

In the blink of an eye the man transforms. Horns curve with the shape of his skull, producing from close to his temples, before ending in sharp tips that blend in with his raven hair. A black tail is wrapped around his leg which ends with a jagged spear-like point. The tips of his fingers look like they’ve been dipped in charcoal, fading into dark grey about halfway up his fingers, with claw-like black nails top it all off. They tap against the metal shelf next to them as the demon slowly advances.  

Too shocked to move, Allen’s jaw is taken in a firm grip and when the demon smiles his teeth are pointed blades. “So… are you going to tell me what it is you want?”

“You can let go of my face for a start,” Allen says, adding a quick “thank you,” when the demon does as he’s told. “What’s your name?”

“You may call me Sixty.”

“Sixty,” Allen repeats. “No offence but I quite like having my soul intact. I’m sorry for dragging you from… whatever circle of hell you reside in, but I’m not interested in making any sort of deal with you.”

“Sucks to be you then because I’m not leaving until you do,” Sixty says and from his tone of voice alone Allen knows he’s a hundred percent serious.  

‘Fucking IKEA.’

-

“Really? You couldn’t have chosen to live somewhere a bit warmer?” Sixty asks with disdain, thankfully back to looking human. His feet sink into the four inches worth of snow dusting the ground and he can already feel the cold seeping in through the gaps in his clothing. “Or somewhere nicer in general.”

“No one’s forcing you to stay.”

“No one’s forcing you to live here.” A pause. “Or if they are, I am more than willing to kill them for you free of charge.”  

Allen sighs.

-

Having a demon for a housemate isn’t as bad as he thought it would be. Sixty mostly keeps to himself whenever he isn’t trying to get a rise out of him or complaining about the cold or putting things on tall shelves like the little shit he is. Until Sixty gets bored that is.

Because when Sixty gets bored trouble ensues.  

-

Emerging from his office after a long day of meetings to see his demonic housemate casually chatting with parts of his team in the breakroom is a bit out of left field and the sight of Sixty’s mischievous eyes boring into his own is enough to quicken his pace. “What are you doing here, Si- Silas?” he asks, forcing a smile on his face.

He hates how no one else can look past the innocent brown eyes and syrupy grin to see the smugness beneath. “I thought we were supposed to eat lunch together? Did you forget?”

“No, of course not,” Allen hastens to say, ignoring Willis and Clark’s knowing grins, as he wracks his brain for a response. “Though I distinctly remember asking you to wait outside.”

“It would have been rude of me to decline Julie’s offer of getting coffee,” Sixty replies and raises his mug as if to show it off.

“No need to be jealous, boss. We just wanted to get to know the guy better,” Julie says.

“Yeah, it’s not like we’ve ever seen you hang out with anyone outside of work apart from Reed,” Clark pipes up. “We got curious.”

“I’m not jealous!” Allen tries to defend himself, latching on to the word, but the agitated tone does nothing to help his case. Sixty smirking behind the rim of the coffee cup like a cat who got the cream isn’t helping to improve his mood either.

“You are the pettiest asshole I’ve ever had the unfortunate luck of meeting,” Allen says when they’re safely away from prying eyes.

Sixty snickers, knowing full well the amount of endless curiosity and ceaseless questions he’s unleashed on the human. “There’s an easy way to get rid of me.”

The fistful of snow he gets shoved in his face shouldn’t have come as a surprise.

By the time he manages to blink the melting snow out of his eyes Allen is too far away to retaliate, though that doesn’t stop Sixty from trying.  

-

Despite his best efforts Sixty’s irritation with being unceremoniously dragged into the mortal plane dissipates after the third week of staying with Allen. By the time he’s been there for a month and a half, Allen’s team have adopted him as one of their own and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t flattered. They genuinely care about his well-being and often invite him along on outings. As someone whose family is… overbearing, their light-hearted ribbing is a nice change of pace. Their easy dynamic is the very opposite of stifling. No one ever pries when he declines to answer a question. No one touches him after he made it clear he dislikes physical contact. No one quizzes him about his every movement.

It’s… nice.

The next team building exercise and subsequent photo op, proudly displayed on the communal fridge, includes him and Sixty doesn’t cry even a little bit upon seeing that.  

Not at all.

-

In the end, the shift in their relationship is near seamless ‒ from reluctant roommates to friends to something more.  

What hits him first is the metallic scent of fresh blood and Sixty is halfway across the room before he can even process rising to his feet. He gathers Allen up in his arms and leads him to sit down on one of the kitchen chairs. Part of his dark shirt is tacky with blood and Sixty feels no remorse when he shreds it to get it off as quickly as possible. Something, a bullet or knife, must have grazed his side. It’s bleeding sluggishly though it thankfully isn’t deep. Sixty takes the ruined shirt and presses it against the wound. “Keep putting pressure on it.”

Allen doesn’t answer and in the end he’s the one who has to move Allen’s hand to take over while he dashes to the bathroom for the medkit. Sixty plunks it down on the floor and fills a bowl of lukewarm water to put down beside it before fetching a clean towel. He kneels down between Allen’s legs and cleans meticulously around the area, noting the patches of skin where bruises are slowly forming. Swiping over the wound with antiseptic earns him a bitten-off hiss and Sixty puts a hand on Allen’s sternum to steady him after the first involuntary flinch.  

He keeps it there, soothed by feeling the steady thrum of Allen’s heartbeat beneath his fingertips, until he needs the use of both his hands. In its absence, Sixty’s tail comes up to wrap loosely around his thigh for comfort.  

Butterfly bandages instead of sutures, his tail instead of his hand. Allen doesn’t say a word about either choice though he is smiling down where they’re connected once Sixty chances a quick peek.

There’s nothing left for him to do after covering the wound with gauze, taping the edges down, yet Sixty finds himself lingering there regardless.  

It’s easy to trace around the gauze with the very tip of a claw and when he catches Allen’s dark eyes the urge to lean down to place a gentle kiss over it wins out. Allen sighs quietly and coaxes Sixty up to kiss him properly ‒ a chaste press of lips against lips followed by a sincere thank you.  

Sixty blushes and knocks his forehead against Allen’s, mindful of his horns, in a silent show of affection.

-

“Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

“Because I literally stepped in the door a second ago?” Allen laughs and pulls Sixty in for a quick kiss.

“Excuses,” Sixty sniffs and steals another kiss, one that quickly devolves into a dozen pecks being pressed all over his face until Allen plants a last lingering one to his lips.

“I love you,” Allen says when they break apart for real.  

The shy smile spreading over Sixty’s lips is one he’ll never tire of seeing.

[nanoland]

title: Compass Rose 

series: Lucifer (TV) 

pairings: Mazikeen/Eve

summary: In which Mazikeen exercises her renowned patience. 

warnings: Lucifer is kind of a dick in this. Not intentionally; he’s just young and colossally self-centered. 

 Also on Ao3! 

0 

“You. Demon. What’s your name?” asks the Morningstar, looking bored and depressed, as usual.

She straightens up, brimming with nerves and excitement, feeling her acidic blood bubble happily because he’s so handsome! And he’s talking to her! Her siblings will shriek with jealousy when they hear of this. “Mazikeen, my liege.”

“Mazikeen,” he repeats, mispronouncing it. “Great. Maze, do something about… all that, would you? It’s dreadfully grating.”

He gestures to the sea of damned, miserable human souls milling around the base of his throne, calling up to him for help or mercy.

“Yes, my liege,” she says, her bright mind already hard at work planning the next few millennia of punishment.

 0 

“Maze, is there a letter from Amenadiel?”

Mazikeen is now four hundred years old and in all that time, not a single letter has arrived in Hell, from Amenadiel or anyone else. Regardless, her handsome king asks every week.

It’s fine. She’s far too mature and cunning to feel even the slightest scrap of envy towards some pompous old angel she’s never even met, regardless of how obviously Lucifer loves him.

Regardless of how obvious it is that he loves no one in Hell half as much.

“No, my liege.”

“Hmm. Fine. Whatever. Fuck him, then. Brothers – who needs ‘em?”

She nods. She herself has many, many brothers, and sisters, and siblings who are neither or both, and she certainly doesn’t need them.

(Sometimes she longs for them, especially when she’s weary from the years and years dedicated to building and securing Lucifer’s kingdom, but she never needs. Needing is for the weak.)

It occurs to her that that king might be cheered by stories of Tradiusis, her most treasured and most useless brother, who is prone to chatting with the damned and asking them about all the silly human indulgences they enjoyed in life, like movies and theme parks and hot dogs. Fool that he is, the mere thought of him always brings a smile to her face.

But she decides against it, suspecting that if she were to begin telling Lucifer about her family, he’d get that same dull, faintly irritated expression she sees every time she reads him a report about the number of new arrivals and how various parts of Hell will need to be restructured to accommodate them all.

(She wonders what will happen when Hell is full – does he have a plan? Is she expected to have a plan?)

(How long, exactly, are they supposed to keep doing this?)

(Surely this can’t be all they were made for?)  

 0  

“Maze, get me a drink, would you?”

Mazikeen is Lucifer’s right hand, his bodyguard, the highest-ranked demon in Hell, named the Lady of Pain, the Whirlwind, and the Blood Dancer by her peers and underlings.

Pouring drinks is… new to her.

But this is what he wants; this club, this loud music, these inebriated humans constantly demanding attention and entertainment, constantly needing to be managed. And he’s her king.

She pours him his drink and listens to him play the piano, until some wretch attempts to grope her and loses two fingers.

 0 

Running a nightclub is, it turns out, complicated.

There are all sorts of rules and regulations regarding what can and cannot be done inside it.

At one point, Lucifer decides it would be fun to have white tigers roaming the dance floor. After a few days spent looking into that option, she has to explain that they may to have settle for waitresses dressed as tigers. He pouts like it’s her fault and goes back to the piano.

She’s also not allowed to kill anyone, which is, honestly, ridiculous. Mazikeen is an ancient being, a warrior nigh unparalleled, with centuries of experience contending with the worst the human race has to offer, and every single night she endures treatment from at least one of Lucifer’s guests that, even to her vast, reasonable, and patient mind, clearly warrants swift annihilation.

If murder is, indeed, illegal, how do all the mortal women in this city who serve drinks cope?

“You block it out, I guess,” says Suzy, a waitress with thick red hair and tired eyes, after Mazikeen has had to save her yet again from a patron with wandering hands (and now broken hands). “You know, just… don’t let it get to you. Grow a thick skin.”

Mazikeen considers the half of her body that has no skin whatsoever and snickers inappropriately. Then she gifts Suzy one of her knives.

 0 

Chloe gasps. “Maze! No! Absolutely not!”

“Why?” she asks, annoyed but also genuinely curious.

“I can’t just torture a suspect to get information, Maze. It’s wrong.”

Mazikeen considers saying: You already torture people. You lock them up in tiny boxes until their minds break and their lives are utterly ruined. How is that different? I don’t understand.

Mazikeen considers saying: You let Lucifer violate peoples’ innermost selves to obtain information. How is that better? I don’t understand.

Mazikeen considers saying: I don’t want to be good. I don’t care about being good. So why do I seem to put so much more thought into how to be good than you do? I don’t understand, I don’t, I don’t.

Instead, Mazikeen rolls her eyes and says nothing.

 0 

“Maze! No! What were you thinking?” cries Linda, rushing over to the cradle. “You can’t give that to a baby!”

She snatches away Mazikeen’s present; a blade, small and silver, just right for tiny hands, the same blade Mazikeen herself received from her favourite sister on her fourth birthday. It has tasted the blood of over a hundred enemies.

Charlie starts to cry and Linda puts the blade aside so she can pick him up and comfort him.

“Children need to be able to protect themselves,” Mazikeen insists.

“No, Maze. Children need to be protected.”

“No one protected me.”

Linda doesn’t say: Exactly. Why would I want my son to be anything like you?

Because Linda is kind.

But Mazikeen is perceptive and she sees it in her friend’s eyes all the same.

 0 

“So then, then it turns out that Jon Snow is actually Daenarys Targaryen’s cousin, right, which makes him – oh no! – a rival contender for the Iron Throne, and…”

“Ugh,” Mazikeen groans, cutting Ella off. “I thought this was a show about dragons! Why does it waste so much time on people either fucking or killing their relatives?”

She laughs at Mazikeen’s exaggerated annoyance. “It’s not just about dragons. There’s a lot of stuff about politics and war and, yeah, fucked-up family dynamics. Honestly, that’s one of the reasons it grips me so much. My own family’s always got a ton of drama going on, too. I mean – no incest. Not that I’m aware of. But you know all about my brothers.”

Mazikeen is about to ask what the dragons look like – whether the show’s version bears any resemblance to the beasts she’s ridden into battle – when Ella tilts her head sideways and squints at her. “Huh. Now that I think about it… I’ve told you all about my brothers but I’ve never asked anything about your family. That was shitty of me! Can I ask now? Or is it, like, one of those things you don’t talk about? Like where you’re from and how you met Lucifer?”

Fiddling with a lock of her hair – it’s straight and black today – Mazikeen says, “I don’t mind talking about it. Just… most people don’t care.”

Ella frowns, briefly (cutely, curse her). “Well, I wanna know! You got any brothers?”

“Yeah.”

“How many?”

“A lot. I’m not actually sure exactly how many there are now.”

“Oh, right. Gotcha. Are you close to any of them?”

“Not these days. But when we were young, we were pretty tight-knit. Didn’t really have anyone besides each other.”

Ella asks her more questions and though she has to keep her answers extremely vague, Mazikeen finds that she likes talking about her home and her childhood. Prolonged exposure to the human world has begun to make her feel insubstantial; a tool, a disguise, a thing without roots or history. Lucifer’s been no help with that, for he’s only ever known her as his servant (and, sometimes, when he’s in a good mood, his friend, by virtue of the fact that friendship with someone who works for you – who can do nothing but work for you – requires no tedious emotional labour whatsoever).

It’s nice to remember that she has, in fact, been other things. That she could, perhaps, be other things in the future.

 0 

“So,” Dan slurs, hunched over his beer. “You got whores… hordes… horns? Thought demons had horns.”

She’s busy applying a fresh coat of candy-pink lipstick to match her powder-blue bob. “Some do. I don’t.”

“Well, that sucks. That’s not fair! You deserve horns. You’re cool, Maze.”

Because that provokes a twinge of genuine affection, she says, “Wanna see what I have got?”

“Hell, yeah!”

He grins drunkenly.

“You need to promise not to scream.”

“Oh – oh, man, is it scary? Is it gross?”

She shows him her true face.

After a moment of owlish blinking, he shrugs and returns to his beer. “Eh. S’not that gross. Lucifer’s grosser. Wanna play pool?”

 0 

Amenadiel presents her with a beautiful black sheath. “I crafted it from my own feathers. It will keep the blade contained until he’s old enough to wield it safely.”

She slides Charlie’s knife into it. “Someone will need to teach him.”

“Who taught you?”

“Me? No one. They just threw us at one another and clapped for whoever survived. But… well. He’s not like me, is he?”

The angel places the sheathed blade down beside Charlie’s stuffed rabbit and plastic truck. “Maybe not now. With any luck, that will change.”

 0 

“Ma-aaze,” Lucifer groans, flopping back in his armchair with his long legs artfully folded and his hand over his eyes. “I’ve had such a tiresome morning. Pour me a drink, would you?”

“Pour it your damn self,” she suggests, standing on his penthouse’s balcony and admiring the view. His throne in Hell was about as tall as this building. From up here, all the little people down below look exactly the same.

He pouts and fetches a glass – and, to her surprise, one for her as well.

 0 

Mazikeen brings an abrupt, efficient end to the bar fight by slamming her palm into an assailant’s solar plexus.

He drops like a ton of bricks, joining the pile of groaning men, broken furniture, and smashed bottles. (Shit; it’s going to take ages to clean all this up. If Lucifer didn’t have infinite money, Lux would have gone bankrupt eight times by now.)

She turns to see Eve staring at her, beautiful mouth hanging open, and braces herself for the “Maze! No!”.

“That was so cool,” Eve breathes, and rushes over to leap into Mazikeen’s arms, only to draw back at the last second. “Oh no! You’re hurt!”

There is, indeed, a small cut on Mazikeen’s left hand.

“Don’t care, doesn’t matter,” says Mazikeen, reaching for her, wanting badly to be kissed.

But Eve drags her into a quiet back room where she applies disinfectant and bandaids with cartoon cats on them.

“I really wanna learn how you did that thing with your elbow,” she chatters, wiping away a few spots of blood with a white handkerchief. “The way his nose just went crunch! – man, it was fantastic.”

“I can teach you. If you like.”

Eve’s dark eyes are fond. “You’re always offering to do something for me – to teach me how to fight, or to carry something, or to protect me. It’s… like, I love it. But you know you don’t have to, right?”

“Yeah. I do.”

“I wanna do stuff for you sometimes. Oh! That reminds me. Lucifer was going to take Chloe to a wrestling match but then they had another fight and he’s back to being sad, sooo I stole the tickets out of his jacket. Wanna go?”

“I love you,” says Mazikeen, even though she’s said it five times today. She likes the way it sounds in her mouth. She likes the way it makes Eve’s whole face sparkle.

“I love you too, babe.”

[the-socially-awkward-cat]

Fallen Angel (Ch. 1/30)

Rating:Teen And Up Audiences Ships: Radiodust and several minor ships.

Summary: No one expected Angel Dust to return to Hell mere months after his ascension into Heaven.

But at least he gets to reunite with his old friends at the Happy Hotel, his real home. Including the Radio Demon, with whom he'd left off on a budding friendship, and the embarrassing crush he should've never confessed.

--

An exercise in roleplaying brought to you by Nekokolove (concept) and ornithia (editor)

Chapter 1: The fall

Cast:

ornithia - Alastor, Charlie Magne Nekokolove - Angel Dust, Vaggie, Husk, Niffty

Angel Dust ascending to Heaven was something no one saw it coming, much less himself. His last days at the Hotel were peaceful and even a bit melancholic.

He'd actually had the guts to tell Alastor he had romantic feelings for him, just to be left without a direct answer. So he took that as a 'no' and chose to respect the man that obviously felt uncomfortable.

His body burned and his vision filled with light. Angel closed his eyes, and the next thing he knew, he was in front of dozens of celestial creatures.

All seemed like a feverish dream. And it lasted very briefly, too. (Weeks? A couple of months?) He ended up being kicked back down to Hell; those angels seemed pretty pleased to do it, really.

He hit the ground hard, making an enormous crack. After composing himself a bit, he walked to the only place he could think about. Almost no one saw him really, how fitting.

"Why, that was hardly necessary, wasn't it!"

With a heavy sigh, the Radio Demon came to rest against a sturdy set of doors, bodily closing them shut in his wake - really, in the linen closet, of all places? It was hardly sanitary! Certainly, it had been the right call to make an 'example' of the culprit, lest the rest of the hotel get any "funny" ideas about the conditions concerning their stay here. Still ...

"..."

A puddle of red began to ooze from behind the closed doors. Looking down at it, Alastor pushed himself off the wooden frame at last, painting cervine-tracks across the carpet with each step he took. Paying no mind to the crimson tell-tale trail, he withdrew a microphone stand from the nearest set of shadows instead, tapping it twice to bring it to life.

:: Niffty, darling, have I got a job just for y -::

And that's when he felt it. The "news" hit him like ... well, radio waves, what else? Rushing through the conduit of his staff and into his very core, he felt awareness spread from the top of his antlers to the very tips of his hooves.

::- ou. Excuse me - is Husker with you, by any chance? It appears we have a "guest" outside. Have him see to it that he is made most welcome. The bar can wait for him after. ::

He wasn't ready for this. Briskly, he made his way towards the lounge, to see, if nothing else.

The spider wasn't sure how he survived the fall as well as he did, and managed to walk all the way to the hotel; it was probably his new angelic strength. His eyes felt so heavy he almost didn't see who opened the door.

"Hello, guess who's back?" he mumbled and his legs stopped working, collapsing him onto the person that opened the door.

"What the fuck?!" Husk said, barely catching Angel’s unconscious body. "Princess! Uh, someone! ... You are not gonna believe this!" He yelled, trying to bring Angel inside.

Vaggie reached the hall and her mouth actually hung open at the sight of Angel Dust.

"Vaggie? What's going on-oh, hey Al!"

Spawn of Lucifer, this was not the time! Alastor had nearly made it to his destination when he nearly collided with the heiress of Hell herself.

"Charlie!"

Stumbling in his tracks, he skid to a stop before the princess, impatiently fixing her with a manic grin. "Do you mind???"

"Al? What's going on? What's with everyone and- ohmygosh! "

Ah, there it was. Her demeanor changed the second she peeked around the corner, spotting what he knew lay just out of view. Just as swiftly as he'd come, she was gone, though still audible:

"Angel? Is that you! Oh, Angel!" -

Feeling all of his momentum drain, Alastor now hovered near the wall, unable to bring himself to take that final step. He continued listening to the others, instead:

"We missed you so much, what happened? We thought it was the last time we'd see you again, right Vaggie? And then, and th-then .... w-w-wahh! "

Oh, Charlie, ever-loving, ever-caring Charlie, who wore her heart on her sleeve like a badge of honor. She'd broken into hysterics again, and was undoubtedly clinging to someone in the midst of it. He pressed a hand over his mouth, feeling how his expression grew lax with reluctant emotion.

"I-I'm just so proud of you! We all were, even-"

One leg stepped out hesitantly from the hall, while the other bounced on its heel. Whether it was eagerness to spring forth or pull back, Alastor had yet to decide.

Damn this deer body.

"Hi, girls" Angel said weakly.

"Here, put him here. How is this even possible? Hush honey, he is gonna be fine." Vaggie helped to put Angel on the big couch of the hall, and smoothed over her girlfriend's state. She couldn't believe the spider demon was here again.

"I guess they didn't like me," Angel mustered, "I tried, I really tried. But I guess I gave up at some point. I'm sorry Charlie". He felt his body adjusting, and his wounds slowly healing.

"N-No, don't be! You were wonderful! "

Finding comfort in the arms of her girlfriend, Charlie took a moment to collect her emotions before pulling away reluctantly - she was a princess, darn it! And here was a subject, no - a client, in crisis and in need! And she was going to do her best to help him, one way or another:

"Believe me, I've heard stories from Dad. About Heaven and how beautiful and bright and gorgeous ... but the staff? Pfft!"

She put on a silly and poor imitation of the one and only Ruler of Hell:

"'Why, those amateurs just don't know a good thing when they see it!'"

Read the rest here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26511166/chapters/64613485

[klbmsw]

Thomas Clay-

· There's a reason why we can't have nice things in this country. Our roads and bridges are falling apart. Our electrical grid is so antiquated that if most civilians understood how bad it really is, there would be drastic measures taken. There are a whole variety of cybercrimes that happen every single day including child sex trafficking that we can't even get the house or senate to address because Republicans would rather litigate Roe vs. Wade every election cycle than to accomplish anything real or meaningful that would make life better for the American people. Truly, I say this in all honesty and the utmost contempt, if any Republican wanted to help their fellow countrymen then they'd find the nearest pool of water and drown themselves. Of course Republicans are too heartless and selfish to do anything for the good of the country or their fellow man. As you can tell, I've become a bit more ornery the past three and a half years but the last week or so has put me in a lather of murderous rage after the Scumbag-in-Chief had the unmitigated gall to claim Kamala wasn't 'qualified' to be Veep while his toady DeJoy is dismantling our post office to prevent people from exercising their right to vote in the vain hope of helping Dumbfuckitus get re-elected. Anyone seen any Republicans saying this isn't okay? That slowing down the mail on purpose is keeping our veterans from getting their meds on time? Anyone remember the apoplectic rage seizures Republicans were having when Clinton pardoned Marc Rich? Or how silent they are now after he commutes Roger Stone's sentence?What I am grateful to Trump for is proving me right to all of my friends who would say to me, 'Oh Thomas! Republicans aren't as bad as you're saying they are! It's just a difference of opinion but we're all Americans in the end.' Well how'd that turn out for ya hmm?Republicans will lie about anything, cheat as the day is long and steal as much as they possibly can from future generation who will just have to listen to The Black Keys' 'I Got Mine' and suck it because doing anything for anyone else is anathema to the black hearts that pump the slime of sedition through their veins. Trump has known since before the election that Russia was interfering in our election to benefit him alone and after the election he promised to have a commission look into it. What's he done to keep a foreign country from undermining our Republic again? Well besides not a damn thing, he's floating the turd of an idea that he should have Putin come to Washington so he can show how 'tough he is on Russia.' It's enough to make even the grossest flatterer nauseous. If Republicans gave one solitary frig about a fair election, we could have block-chain electronic voting. Block-chain encryption is what Bitcoin uses and it is quite simply impossible to hack. It is impossible to forge or tamper with. Each nonce and hash created in a block chain is unique like a social security number. To give you some idea how big a 256 bit encryption chain is, when Alan Turing was trying to crack the German Enigma machine, the possibilities of finding the key were one in 158 million million million combinations or a trillion million. The numbers to a 256 bit encryption are so large they would make Kurt Gödel crosseyed. The technology exist right now for all Americans to vote instantly and safely. We would have all of votes counted instantly and we could declare a winner as soon as the last poll closed. But we can't have nice things like that because 5% of the population controls 40 senate seats which are you guessed it, Republicans. Republicans have no interests in a free and fair election because they know if they had to compete by winning a simple majority vote, they would be in a permanent minority. That's why scumbags like Brian Kemp and Ron DeSantis do everything they possibly can to keep black people from voting.Black people aren't their only problem come November. Right now Joe Biden leads Trump among Latinos 59% to 31% and naturally you would wonder how any Latino could support Trump. It's no different than chickens voting for Colonel Sanders but that's not important. What is important is that there are over 8 million newly registered latino voters in the United States, 2 million in Texas alone. I might be telling tales out of school but I don't think Latinos are much happy with Stephen Miller's nazi policies towards them. Think what you want but Trump is not trying to sabotage the Postal Service and constantly whining about imaginary voter fraud because he's not worried about winning this election. He's good and scared and he should be because as dumb as Trump is, he is well aware of what Attorney General Adam Schiff is going to do to his felonious ass! He can sign as many pardons for his friends and family as he wants but you can't pardon someone for charges that haven't been filed yet. If we ever hope to rebuild what's left of our self-respect as a nation then Donald John Trump must spend the rest of his god-forsaken life in prison for the crimes he's committed against the people and our Republic. For all you namby pamby democrats who still soil your honor by speaking to Republicans, just remember this; Republicans are nihilistic lying scumbags who should be afforded the same deference we grant syphilis and pederast. You best get that straight NOW before you start telling your 'friends', "it's got what plants need' because I am damn sick of having that orange shit-demon in my life and anyone who isn't on the Fuck Trump Train is a mortal enemy to all that's right and good about the United States and we must all be ready to raze the earth to remove that petulant miscreant from our house come hell or high water on November the 3rd.If you'd like to help me keep shoving a harpoon into Fat Nixon's ass, please join my patreon for a paltry $1 a month. Thanks. https://www.patreon.com/thomasclayjr

[austinpanda]

Dad Letter 080521

5 September, 2021

Dear Dad--

Another week full of joy at being alive has passed! That may sound sarcastic, and it mostly is, but things are actually improving. I’ve been quite depressed of late, and I appreciate your offers of help. I’m going to be quite alright, I’ve decided. A few things are getting better on their own, and a few things are getting better because I’m working at getting them better. Examples: It helps when it’s not 90 degrees outside--an increasingly frequent occurrence here in Maine--since that makes it 90 degrees inside. A window AC unit can only create a cone of tolerability directly in front of it, while the rest of the trailer feels like a sauna. Once September began, however, it was like a door slamming shut. Now we’re getting cold fronts and lows in the upper 40s in the mornings and highs in the 70s, and it’s the kind of weather that makes you happy just to be alive and outside.

Another thing getting better, if only with agonizing slowness, is my job. The main problem with my job right now is this: There are seven audits. I’ve learned about 6.8 of them, but there’s one part of one audit that I’ve mentioned in the past, it’s just an order of magnitude more complicated. After a few more months it won’t seem that way at all, but for now, it’s still Chinese algebra--I might as well be looking at Sanskrit; it just makes no sense to me most of the time. And the boss is, I think, tired of me not knowing it. The boss can, I think, go fornicate himself, because, the way I look at it, if I’m trying my best to learn, and I haven’t learned it yet, it’s not because I’m failing, it’s because the shit’s complicated, and he’s failed to teach it to me yet. Ha ha, take that, boss man!

Anyway, I’m attempting to let it go. And now that my retirement savings from Progressive is completely gone, I’m also attempting to live within my means again, which is proving a challenge. And it’s not a challenge because of my extravagant lifestyle, it’s a challenge because everyone wants money in exchange for shit, and I’m only getting $14.00 per hour so far. Also, the casino is taking $30 off each paycheck, a total of 10 times, to pay for my $300 state gaming license, which I’m required to have. Also, the casino is taking $47 out of each paycheck, a total of 4 times, because of something they fucked up with my benefits that somehow put me in arrears. I am forced to wonder if Consumer Reports ever made a top 10 list of inexpensive brands of cat foot that, in a pinch, might be fit for human consumption.

So some of my concerns are financial. Some others are related to making new friends. Zach and I have both been attempting to make new friends lately, and to our horror, the number of friends we have here in Maine is actually going down. We made one friend when we moved here, Josh, the one who is addicted to Christmas decorations, and for various reasons, we don’t hang out with him any more. I made a new friend who promptly disappeared on me. Zach made a couple of new friends that have decided not to return his texts. We are forced to wonder what unpleasant odors we might be emitting. My goal was to have a New Year’s Eve party here that I could invite 5 people to, and at this point, I’m not going to reach the number 5 unless 3 of them arrive at gunpoint. So I’m going to attempt to make some new friends. Working in a casino should help; got lots of interesting coworkers. And if we can ever get past this Covid bullshit, I might be able to attend a social gathering every now and again.

I have begun my two month scary movie marathon! I began with Night of the Demon, as I always do, and I’ve been watching a few of my other favorites too, like The Legend of Hell House, and the Haunting, and The House on Haunted Hill, and The Haunting of Hill House, and House of Usher, and House (Japan, 1979).

I think some of the news is going to have to take the form of a bullet list.

I thought “The quality of mercy is not strained,” was from the Bible. Nope, it’s from The Merchant of Venice.

The casino, for all the money they’re taking from me, is going to give me a $50 WalMart gift card, as a reward for emailing H.R. a copy of my vaccination card.

As of today, I have put away that AC unit. We needed it last week to avoid dying of heatstroke, but we’re not going to need it again until probably next June or July.

I’m about to attempt to quit smoking, because I can no longer afford it. Next few days, I should think. I’ll keep you posted. I must buy gum. I need so much sugar-free gum. Perhaps the WalMart gift card will be used for gum. That’s some bullshit; I wanted to use it for something fun, and nourishing to the soul, like...Diet Pepsi. But noooo.

I continue to love the mild weather here, and the frigid winter in particular. At some point, I’m going to experience the ecstasy of having to wake up early in order to dig my car out of the snow, so I can get to work on time. I assume, every once in a while, there’s a snowstorm that’s bad enough, no one is able to get to work for hours and hours. I am looking forward to all of this! I think it draws one closer to one’s neighbors when you live under such shared duress, and the shoveling is good exercise. Also, we only have a few feet of driveway to shovel; it’s going to have to be a pretty apocalyptic snowstorm to push us into heart attack territory. Then, when I make it to work on time, I can be the one person whom everyone else resents, because he proved that it’s possible to make it to work, and now everyone has to show up and do their jobs, when their true desire was to stay home and not do their jobs for a change. Well, tough titty, coworkers. Ricky’s gotta get PAID.

One thing I’m trying to keep my eyes on is the prospect of getting a new car. It may not be new, and it may not be a car--I’m considering a modest SUV--but it would be a new vehicle for me. The reason I’m considering purchasing a modest SUV, which normally I’d find abhorrent because of their poor fuel economy, is because I now live in the land of potholes. In Austin, if a pothole got bad, I knew it wouldn’t be long before a crew came out and fixed it. Here, with all the freezing and thawing, some roads just develop too many of them too quickly, so those roads just spend a lot of time sucking, and being full of potholes. My car, Beige Lightning, had a somewhat creaky suspension before we moved here, and now has a very creaky suspension. I’ve decided, therefore, that I’d like something a bit more impervious to potholes. Also, as a rapidly aging white guy, I claim my right to want something with a bigger, faster engine. Perhaps the money I save from quitting smoking will make this easier to grasp. Will advise!

More next week. All my love to you both!

[our-smooty]

Flowerbeds and Fertile Soil: Chapter 14

Fandom: Good Omens

Rating: Explicit

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens, )Anathema Device/Newton Pulsifer

Tags:  Kidfic, Mpreg kind of, they can choose to present however so idk, Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Crowley Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Vulva (Good Omens), OCs Galor, parenting, using your snake form to avoid confrontation, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pregnancy, if I missed a tag lemme know

Summary: They could do anything, go anywhere, all without the worry of Above or Bellow making a fuss. Even so, they mostly kept to their little patch of Eden, their cottage and garden and the simple life they’d carved out among the locals. Aziraphale opened a book shop in town, where he only occasionally sold any books (and the ones he did sell, were all modern and stocked specifically for that purpose). Crowley focused his attentions on the garden, and if he occasionally helped their elderly neighbour with her disobedient willow tree, then that was a secret no one needed to know. Lately, however, they had both been feeling rather restless, unbeknownst to each other. Aziraphale tried reorganizing his store, changing the way he tied his bowtie and even ate pizza –something he considered to be far too messy for him personally. Crowley had branched out into birdwatching, and then car maintenance (the human way), and even reading. Nothing scratched the itch for either of them.

Ao3 Link

It was Beelzebub’s turn to pick the meeting spot, so of course they were standing in a dark, damp back alley somewhere in the American Mid-West at three in the morning. Seemed a little out of the way to Gabriel, but the Prince of Hell had said something about an on-going project with the American political system that they couldn’t leave for a even a second, so here he was. 

“We couldn’t meet inside somewhere? he sneered, eyeing the way his designer shoes were getting ruined in the disgusting sludge coming from a dumpster a few feet away.

“Don’t want you and your lot closer to this project than necessary. You’d just fuck it all up,” Beelzebub answered, rolling their eyes at him. Gabriel huffed and straightened his collar, though it of course wasn’t at all out of place. 

“Well let’s make it quick then. Did your humans…?”

A dangerous growl that Gabriel was glad wasn’t directed at him. “No. Idiots got scared off by whatever the bastard had set up. They all ran off anyways.”

“Well mine got the job done. They sent a little… encouragement, to that ratty bookshop Aziraphale insists on keeping.” Gabriel was practically preening and he knew it. Being able to show up Beelzebub in any way always put him in a positive mood. Thwarting the enemy and all that.

“It’d be easier if we could be direct,” Beezle growled. The flies swarming around the dumpster began to make their way over and Gabriel had to swat a few away with the back of his hand.

“Get a hold of yourself, Beez. You were there, you know the almighty was clear that neither one of us could interfere directly!” Using humans as a loophole had been Michael’s idea and so far there hadn’t been any repercussions. But this had only been a test, and since things had gone well…

“We can escalate though, yes?” they buzzed, the flies zipping around excitedly and a grin breaking out on their face. “My contacts from before have been... reprimanded appropriately, and we’re ready to move on whenever you are.”

Gabriel’s face morphed into a tight smile of his own. He always had admired his demonic counterpart’s willingness to get a job done, no matter the cost. Beelzebub was shrewd and cutthroat and if they hadn’t been one of Satan’s damned, Gabriel might have hired them for a position Upstairs.

“Yes, we can move on to phase 2. Give it a few weeks, I’ll send you a memo, and a calendar invite for the pre-briefing. It’s Heaven’s turn to cater so…” Which was a good thing, since last time when it’d been Hell’s turn the lettuce on the tea sandwiches had been mouldy. Gabriel didn’t partake in the gross matter but it was the principle of the thing! “Are we still on for that event in Berlin next Saturday?”

“You’re the one who said it’d be in both our best interests if it went well, so yeah, I’ll be there. Don’t get in my way.” Beelzebub threw up a rather rude hand gesture then disappeared through a door in one of the buildings. Gabriel spent a few extra minutes in the ally, pondering whether contacting the demon to make sure their chosen apparel didn’t clash, or if that might get him in more trouble than it was worth.

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The hunger didn’t really go away. Crowley woke up almost every morning with a strong desire to get to the breakfast table that persisted throughout lunch and supper. Aziraphale enjoyed it as an opportunity to exercise his cooking skills, even if it did require him to spend more of his day in the kitchen than was usual. Crowley repaid him for his kindness of course, he’d bring in fresh flowers (though with the changing seasons, he was going to have to switch to gourds), or later in the day bring him cocoa and biscuits while the angel was working on restoring a book. Sometimes, after a particularly good supper, Crowley might drop to his knees under the table and thank Aziraphale in a different way that the angel liked just as much as any of the others. 

The change of season brought on a change in their routines as well. Since it was getting colder, Crowley spent a lot more of his time indoors curled up in front of the fireplace watching reality TV, or in bed taking long indulgent naps. When they’d first moved in together Crowley had tried to stay awake and active through the colder months, scared Aziraphale would be upset with him for lounging about. But after 10 years they’d come to an understanding. As long as Crowley made an effort to spend at least a little bit of time-conscious with the angel every day (barring very long naps, which were usually discussed beforehand), Aziraphale was happy. And Aziraphale being happy made Crowley happy which in turn made the colder months of the year much more pleasant for the demon. 

On a blustery November afternoon, Crowley was making a significant effort to be awake as Aziraphale showed him pictures of cribs on his own laptop. He never should have shown the angel pinterest, or Amazon. 

“So what do you think? I thought something traditional would be nice, and of course money isn’t really an object, and maybe there’s someone in town who does carpentry? But what about safety?” Crowley browsed the collections of cribs, and rocking chairs, and various baby paraphilia, trying to keep himself from drifting off. He’s set an alarm to wake him up just after midday in case he didn’t wake up naturally. Of course, he’d snoozed it a few times before dragging himself out of their bedroom and into the sitting room for a cuppa.

“Think we’ve seen thousands of babies make it just fine, even without all these fancy cribs and chairs and baskets. You know we can make just about anything safe if we want to, with wards and a good talking-to.” He paused on a simple crib made of light pine with gently scalloped finishings. “I know I’ve seen signs for ‘rustic’ furniture around the village, m’sure you could find someone to make one like this.”

“That would be lovely, wouldn’t it? It’s been a very long time since I had to make use of any woodworking skills, but I’m sure I could sketch something up for a professional to take a look at. Would you like to help, darling?” 

“Sure, go get us a pencil and paper then, and maybe a refill?” There’d be no more coffee since Aziraphale insisted he keep to under a cup a day, but maybe the angel would allow him some tea. Aziraphale gave him a beatific smile then rushed off to his stacks of stationery. Crowley secretly thought it was sweet how Aziraphale still wrote letters on his own custom paper, with fountain pens and a personalized wax seal. Over the millennia he’d gotten thousands of letters from the angel, and he kept each one in a lockbox that was now hidden in the back of their closet. Outwardly, Crowley rolled his eyes when Aziraphale returned, playing the part of out-upon husband as usual.

“Alright, you get a start on here then, while I make more tea. You’ve always been better at the arts than me anyway.” Debatable, but Crowley was too sleepy to really argue. He took a pen and some paper and began to doodle out crib-shaped creations. As the kettle whistled and Aziraphale hummed to himself his drawing moved towards the more specific, detailing little flower engravings for decoration along all the legs. When Aziraphale came back with the tea and some biscuits, Crowley had less of a sketch and more of a fully fleshed-out design.

“Oh Crowley! It’s gorgeous love,” Aziraphale exclaimed as he sat down to take a look. Crowley had barely been thinking about what he was drawing, instead letting his hands take over while his mind coasted in a half-dreaming state. “I love the flowers, and the wings on the corners. “You’re so creative.”

“Thanks angel,” Crowley murmured, looking at his own drawing like he was seeing it for the first time. He took a sip of tea from the cup Aziraphale passed him, relaxing back against his angel. “But I’m sure you can do it better, if you try.”

“Nonsense. I think it’s perfect. Maybe we could do a little more research, just to make sure it’s up to safety standards, just in case, but otherwise, I don’t think I’d change a thing.” Crowley would have argued if he wasn’t already half asleep again, his teacup leaning dangerously to the side. “Are you really so tired my dear? You should have said.”

“Wanted t’spend some time w’you,” he mumbled. The teacup was gone from his hands, presumably taken by Aziraphale, and a warm blanket draped around his shoulders. “Don’t want you t’be lonely.”

“My sweet demon,” Aziraphale cooed. “Thank you, you’re always thinking of me. But I think I’m going to read for a little while, if you’re like to take a nap. You can use my lap, if you’re like.” Crowley was already sliding down so he was horizontal, his head cushioned against Aziraphale thighs. The angel used one hand to turn the pages of the book resting on the arm of the sofa, the other slung low on Crowley’s hips. That hand wormed its way under Crowley’s sweater--soft cotton, with little devil horns on the hood--so he could touch the bare skin of his belly. 

“Love you,” Crowley hummed. Aziraphale wiggled a tiny bit, either in happiness or to get more comfortable, and sighed happily.

“I love you too, dear. Get some sleep.” And Crowley drifted off.

At first he was dreaming about the garden. Not the Garden, but his garden in the South Downs, at the cottage. It was summer, peak flowering period for some of his favourites and he was down on his knees at one of the smaller flower beds pulling weeds. The sun was exceedingly warm at the back of his neck but that was alright, he was nearly done. Then he could go inside and drink some of the lemonade Aziraphale had made earlier.

The dream oozed forward at a leisurely pace and he enjoyed every second. The sun slowly sank towards the horizon and the wind got a little chilly; it must have been later in the summer than he thought. Even though the weather was turning, he still felt warm though, an unfamiliar heat spreading from his core and out to his limbs. He looked down, almost expecting to see something silly like a hot water bottle--dream logic of course; even when he knew he was dreaming Crowley’s imagination got away from him--but instead saw his own body. And the baby bump.

“That you, Sprout?” he asked, his voice echoing strangely in the hazy dreamworld. “You’re very warm, taking after your Papa?”

A familiar wriggling, and something Crowley struggled to define. It almost reminded him of when we was still an angel, and he could sense love, a glowing joy from inside, spilling out through his cracks. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensation, the dream’s slow pace lulling him into a sense of security. Here in his garden there was just him, the baby, and what felt like pure joy.

Crowley didn’t notice the dream shifting. The garden slowly getting darker and colder, the flowers wilting, shriveling, dying. Their cottage faded away, becoming an empty field, the sky a roiling grey. When Crowley opened his eyes and saw his surroundings, the oncoming storm whipping the dead grass and flowers all around, he knew. The warmth in his stomach pulled away and Crowley felt cold.

Something was coming.

Aziraphale was startled from deep in his reread of Frankenstein’s Monster by Crowley’s shuddering. Normally when the demon had a bad dream the first sign was a noise; a whimper or a shout that would alert Aziraphale to the situation so he could intervene. But even lacking the normal markers, the angel could tell something was wrong. Crowley was a very still sleeper, even if he did cling, and the erratic shaking and shivering he was doing right now certainly wasn’t normal.

“Crowley love, wake up. Shhh, it’s alright,” he said, loud enough to wake the other but softly enough to avoid startling him. He set his book aside and brought both hands into the equation, caressing and petting Crowley’s hair and shoulders. “Come on darling, time to wake up.”

“‘Zira? S’dark.” He didn’t sound upset, or panicked and Aziraphale let out a breath of relief. 

“You were only asleep for an hour, but the suns already set, given how late in the year it is,” Aziraphale explained, still petting Crowley’s hair. “Were you having a bad dream?”

Crowley rubbed his face against the angel’s belly, dispelling the sleep from his eyes. “Strange. I was in the garden, and then it was dark out. Could feel…” He stared down at his stomach. “I think I could feel them there.”

“Really?” Aziraphale meant to ask more about the dream, but was easily sidetracked by the news of the baby communicating. “In what way did you see them?”

“Not see, just felt them. They were warm. But then it got dark, and I felt like I was freezing, and the cottage was gone--” his voice got faster and faster, his breathing more shallow. To stop him flying off into a panic attack Aziraphale thread his fingers through Crowley’s hair again, not really tugging but still a firm presence. “And then I woke up. That's it, nothing exciting angel.”

Aziraphale hummed lowly, in the way he knew relaxed Crowley. “I’m a little jealous of you. For getting to feel them, not for having a nightmare.”

Crowley wiggled so that instead of just his head resting in Aziraphale lap, his entire upper body was laying across his legs. Then he grabbed the hand the angel didn’t have woven through his hair and pressed it to his stomach.

“S’the best I can do. Maybe if you concentrate you’ll feel it too?” Aziraphale tried his hardest, willing his entire celestial self to focus in on that one small area. Underneath his hands Crowley shuddered, but Aziraphale kept on searching until--

“Oh!” He could feel something, at least. It wasn’t really warm, like Crowley had said, but there was movement. It was reassuring to know they were there, and alive, and growing. “You’re amazing Crowley.”

“What, me?” Crowley laughed, thoroughly pleased with himself. The anxiety from the dream didn’t stand a chance against praise from Aziraphale. Still, Crowley looked like he was done sleeping, because he sat up and stretched languorously.  “S’a bit late to go out, but we could order in?”

“If you want. You’ll have to take a look at your application and see what’s available.” Somehow, despite being a ways out into the countryside they always had plenty of options for takeout. And they were well known by all the delivery persons as excellent tippers, so their food usually arrived on time or earlier than expected. “I’m not craving anything in particular.”

“Good, ‘cause I am. I want fries, and maybe a ceasar salad. Oh and falafel.” Crowley was already tapping wildly at his phone, presumably making his order. “And maybe something sweet, for after…”

“Cravings dear?” Aziraphale teased, nudging Crowley with one elbow like he used to do years ago, when they would walk through St. James’ Park. That was before the end that didn’t happen, when even the smallest contact between them was taboo. Now they could touch whenever they wanted, and so Aziraphale didn’t stop at just one nudge, instead choosing to lean heavily against Crowley so he could look at the screen, “The poor delivery person is going to have an awful lot of trouble carrying all that.”

Crowley just rolled his eyes and continued scrolling through his options. “So you don’t want bubble tea? I was going to get you taro flavour but if you think it’s too much--” 

“Now now let's not be hasty love. I'm sure a large tip will make up for any trouble on the driver’s end.” Crowley giggled. Aziraphale tucked the sound away in his memory with all the other cute things Crowley did but would never admit to. 

“I thought so. You can never resist, can you?” Refusing to be needled, Aziraphale decided to fire back. Crowley was so cuddly and soft; so completely unworried now that the nightmare had faded that he couldn’t resist. He nuzzled right underneath the other’s demon-sigil where he knew Crowley was extra sensitive and revelled in the full-body shudder it produced. 

“Why should I? There’s no shame in liking nice things.” Aziraphale let the implication hang. Crowley could still be touchy about being called nice or good outside of the bedroom depending on his mood. This time however, Crowley sighed and shimmied away a bit so he could show Aziraphale the screen.

“Whatever you say angel. Does this look good?” The order list was expansive, and probably much more than either of them would be able to  eat tonight. But that was alright, leftovers wouldn’t last long given Crowley’s new and voracious appetite. 

“Splendid love. I’ll go set the table?” It was really an excuse to get up and move. As much as Aziraphale loved cuddling and pampering his husband, he did tend to get restless. Now that Crowley was awake and relaxed he could get up and bustle about, working off all the energy that had built up while the demon napped. With the excitement of the baby coming Aziraphale had been finding it difficult to sit still and not rush about, preparing everything.

“Can’t we just eat here?” Crowley asked, sprawling into the warm space on the sofa left behind by the angel. Aziraphale smiled and passed his slothful demon the telly remote.

“No, I won’t have you drop tahini and falafel bits all over the carpet. You can eat at the table or not at all.” Crowley glared but there wasn’t really any real anger in it. In fact, it was quite cute, not that he’d ever say that out loud. Crowley would not tolerate being called cute, no matter how happy he was. 

“Fine, stuffy angel.” He turned the TV on and quickly navigated to NBC where Aziraphale knew they’d be playing Golden Girls at this hour. After one last fond look Aziraphale couldn’t stand still any longer, so he hurried off to get everything ready for their impromptu feast.

[rennyforpresident]

Renny’s BBSim: Second Chances Week 9: [Title Redacted]

Welcome back to Biiiiiiiiig Brother!

@brentrobinson​ @cirie-sandra-michaela​ @flopbb-22​ @flungevictee​ @iantxrry​ @kaysarswhore​ @maxdoesbb​ @music-obsessednerd​ @pawn2393​ @paymeincashnottears​ @rennyforpresident​ @swampassthing​  @wheremy--demons--hide​

Jury:  @theminionjcfucked​ @fucklauryn​ @phylisisley​

Last week, in a shocking turn of events, @swampassthing broke the tie to evict @phylisisley from the BB house. What transpired right before that shocking decision?

@flopbb-22, in the bathroom 15 minutes before the live show: “ @swampassthing, come here quick. I need to talk to you.

Listen, I know you have no reason to believe me, but there is no one in this house who has your back, and you know that. @phylisisley will tell you until the end of the day that she has your back, but she will sell you down the river quicker than you can say “Nominated”. You know how I know? She told me your secrets. Yeah, she told me all about the fact that you’ve been throwing comps, you’ve been hiding people’s things, you’ve been rating the people in the house on a scale of 1 through 10 based on hotness and that @cirie-sandra-michaela is a 9. I know it all because she told me. Do with that what you will, but remember that if she stays tonight.”

@swampassthing in the DR before the HOH competition: “*through tears* I trusted her! We had a bond! The fact that she was double crossing me? I had to vote her out, there was no way I could leave her in here after that. I hope she thinks long and hard about what friendship means in the jury house. God, I feel so stupid.”

After the shocking vote, the house is split down the middle, yet again (can y’all get it together for ONE WEEK). And the drama doesn’t end there.

@pawn2393 doesn’t feel supported by her allies. Every time they’ve been in danger, he’s been there for them, but this past week, when his life was on the line, they sat by and watched. He still wants to keep them close, so there’s no dramatic breakup, but he doesn’t feel like he’s a part of the alliance anymore.

Houseguests line up to compete, and this one is gonna be tough. After 10 minutes,

@paymeincashnottears gets to open a prize box! Her box contains a card that says “HAVE-NOT”. She will be the only have-not this week.

At 32 minutes in,

@iantxrry‘s box contains $5,000! Congratulations!

The last box-opener, falling at 41 minutes, is,

@maxdoesbb, your box contains the “BB BullSpit” costume! You will be dressed as a bull for the rest of the week.

After the last box is opened, another houseguest says, I’m done, I don’t have to worry about sabotage now, so I’m out.”

@flopbb-22 is OUT!

It’s the former alliance of three left! No doubt, they’ll all probably keep each other safe, but @cirie-sandra-michaela desperately wants his first comp win. The winner, after 2 hours and 5 minutes, is...

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@cirie-sandra-michaela! You have won safety for the week, and earned the right to nominate two houseguests for eviction.

A newcomer to the HOH suite! @cirie-sandra-michaela is still aligned with @kaysarswhore, and is still close with @pawn2393, but the rest of the house is a little on edge, not knowing where they stand.

At the nomination ceremony....

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@cirie-sandra-michaela: “I have decided to nominate you @iantxrry, and you @paymeincashnottears. At this point, it’s clear who’s on which side of the house. You both seem like floaters to me. At this point in the game, it’s put up or shut up, so I want to see the two of you play!”

@iantxrry in the DR: “I knew this was coming. @cirie-sandra-michaela isn’t on my side, and I can’t trust him as far as I can throw him. This veto is MINE, and then the power won’t be in the other side’s hands”

@paymeincashnottears: “So now I’m the threat? The girl who hasn’t won anything? Who hasn’t been called into the DR until two weeks ago? There’s no way I can possibly be voted out.”

We’ll see about THAT, @paymeincashnottears!

@cirie-sandra-michaela picks their alliance partner, @kaysarswhore to participate, and does a little happy dance after drawing her chip. @iantxrry picks @flopbb-22 and does what can only be described as a sad dance. She really needed @maxdoesbb to play in the comp, but it’s fine. @paymeincashnottears picks @swampassthing to play, and now everyone knows it’s game on: the Veto Queen is here.

This comp requires agility and focus, some things that some of these houseguests struggle with. Who will rise to the occasion? And more importantly, who will flop?

Once everyone has competed, @maxdoesbb reads the results.

With a time of 18:55

@iantxrry laughs off her loss, but spends a solid half hour screaming in the DR to let out her frustrations.

With a time of 9:03

@flopbb-22: “I thought I threw this comp really bad, but I didn’t realize someone could go as slow as @iantxrry did”

With a time of 6:21

@paymeincashnottears in the DR: “*crying* I hate this stupid house! Why can’t I win anything??? I’ve tried so hard in every comp but a win never finds its way to me. If I go home before winning, I’ll LOSE IT”

@swampassthing has been known to make moves before; will she do it again? @cirie-sandra-michaela and @kaysarswhore both want the power to stay in their hands; can they make it happen?

With a time of 5:58

@kaysarswhore yells “Fuck!” after seeing her time, knowing she fumbled the ball. She wanted this POV more than anything, and she desperately didn’t want the power to fall into the other side’s hands

With a time of 5:31, and the winner of the Golden Power of Veto...

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@cirie-sandra-michaela! You went from never having won a comp to winning two in one week!

@cirie-sandra-michaela in the DR: “This veto is EVERYTHING! Y’all thought I wasn’t playing the game? Who’s not playing now? These floaters need to learn that to win this, you have to fight. I wanna see them FIGHT!”

Sights set on the other side of the house, will @cirie-sandra-michaela change his nominees to target someone else?

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With nominations locked in, the houseguests anxiously await Julie to tell them that it’s eviction night.

But with the pressure of being on the block on eviction night, some people begin to lose their cool.

Later that night, after the veto ceremony, @pawn2393 is exercising in the backyard, running laps around the pool. @paymeincashnottears is trying to read in one of the lawn chairs.

@paymeincashnottears: “Can you stop making so much noise? It’s really fucking aggravating”

@pawn2393: “I’m literally just running? I’ve done this every night since I’ve been here, if you don’t like it, go inside.”

@paymeincashnottears: “Fine, I will, bitch.”

Upon the b-bomb being dropped, @pawn2393 yells, “The sad thing was I was gonna vote to keep you! Have fun at jury, tell @phylisisley I said hi!”

Later on, @pawn2393 goes to her former ally and still friend, @kaysarswhore with her problem. Well you know @kaysarswhore isn’t gonna take this shit lying down

@kaysarswhore: “If you wanna talk shit, do it with everybody around! Don’t be a fucking coward!”

(please don’t flip another GODDAMN mattress)

The two get really heated, almost coming to blows, but production calls it off before it can get that far. 

Realizing her terrible mistake, @paymeincashnottears makes the split decision to call everyone to the living room.

@paymeincashnottears: “I am so sorry for my behavior tonight. @pawn2393, I lashed out at you because I’m stressed being in this house on the block. I never meant to make it personal, and I hope you know that I mean that. @kaysarswhore, you’re a good person and I should have never have called you all those horrible things I did earlier. You’re not a loser who reminds me of a child beauty pageant hopeful that never caught her break. You’re so much better than that, and I mean it!”

Everyone gives @paymeincashnottears a big hug afterwards, and everyone goes to bed a little happier.

The next day,

@maxdoesbb continues to put in the work to make sure he’s protected from all angles. He’s not letting his relationship with @kaysarswhore slip away from him just because she has a new final 2 deal with the current HOH.

Live footage of @maxdoesbb in the house seen below:

Fast forward to eviction night!

Julie: “Hello houseguests! I have a hot date right after the taping tonight, so no time for questions! I wanna hear those speeches quick!”

@iantxrry: “I am not a floater. I took out one of the biggest targets in this house when I was Head of Household, and I’ve been nothing but loyal to my side of the house. It’s not my fault we suck at competitions. @cirie-sandra-michaela will be my ONLY target moving forward. I can’t trust you, I don’t like you, and if I get voted out tonight, I will not be voting for you to win a half a million dollars. Everyone else, I hope you vote to keep me, but I look forward to seeing all of you walk into jury after me otherwise. Love y’all!”

@paymeincashnottears: “Well, getting screentime for the first time all season really shook me up, but I want to let you guys know I’m solid now! I’ve been loyal to who I said I was going to be loyal to, and I promise I’ll win my first comp soon! If not, I’ll be happy to let you all keep beating me!”

Julie: “Why did you all talk for so long?? Didn’t I say make it quick? Anyway, time to vote!”

The first vote is to evict @iantxrry. You’re the bigger threat on the block, and there’s no way @flopbb-22 is gonna vote out the other no-comp-winner in the house.

@kaysarswhore thinks that @paymeincashnottears is fake as hell. She didn’t buy that fake ass apology she gave after their fight, and she won’t ever forgive her for calling her cast photo on the memory wall ugly. 

@swampassthing is focused on winning comps and making it to the end with someone easy to beat. @iantxrry is the bigger comp threat, and @paymeincashnottears is the easier player to beat. Win-win

@pawn2393 joins her BFF @kaysarswhore in voting out @paymeincashnottears. After their blowout, there’s just no going back.

Which means @maxdoesbb, will be breaking this tie. Who will he vote out of the house?

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Even though @maxdoesbb loves @iantxrry like a sister, he needs @paymeincashnottears to go so that there’s a bigger social threat than him in the house. His rat game depends on it!

Julie: “When I read the name of the evicted houseguest, they will have one minute to gather their belongings, say their goodbyes, and exit the Big Brother house.”

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Julie: “@iantxrry, come on out!”

Julie: “ @iantxrry, why are you sitting here? You were in such a good position!”

@iantxrry: “I know! I’m royally pissed at @cirie-sandra-michaela, because I knew the second he won, he’d put me up. We never really meshed, and he saw me as his biggest competition on the other side of the house.”

Julie: “There’s been so much talk about sides of the house. Who was on your side?”

@iantxrry: “Well, at the end there, it was really just me, @paymeincashnottears, @maxdoesbb​ and @swampassthing. It was an even 4-4, and now my side is down a number. I’m hoping those guys can pick up the pace and take the power back! I’d vote for any one of them.”

Julie: “Well we’ll see just who you’re voting for back here on finale night. Thank you so much for playing again.

There’s only 7 players left, and just 4 weeks until finale night! Who will come out victorious, and who will become the fifth member of our jury? Find out next time. From outside the Big Brother house, I’m Julie Chen. Goodnight.”

Some of y’all really decided to lose your damn minds this week, but I also wrote this at like 1am so we’ll see who gets taken out next!!

[twistedcharismaaa]

Lost & Found Pt. 2

Summary: You’re living a suffocating life and you finally find breath in Masego.

Author’s Note: Hi guys! I’m back with chapter two as promised! For whatever strange reason, I’m pretty nervous about this chapter. I hope you guys enjoy! I love you guys and thank you so much for all of the feedback from chapter one! As always, leave a comment for ya girl! I live for the commentary!

“I see Lupita

You know I got the Jones

For my own Rashida

Can you put me on

With Danai Gurira

She stay on my dome”

Ladies violently swarmed towards the stage causing you to stumble forward instantly losing the grip on your phone which resulted in you watching it hit the floor harshly. Discombobulated. Disconnected. And maybe a little drunk since you weren’t much of a drinker. You squatted down and patted the floor in hopes your fingertips would seamlessly come across it. To your surprise, they did. But to your misfortune, some thirsty ass heffa kicked it further away from you.

“Fuck!” you yelled.

And where the fuck is Desmonde you thought.

“Ok ok, I see y’all are live in this mothertrucker. That’s what’s up.” Masego said while adjusting his shades.

He casually placed his saxophone on its stand and put his left hand in his pocket.

“So y’all wanna hear something new?” he continued completely enticing the crowd.

You stood upright and watched him in awe. You couldn’t believe this was the same man from earlier. What the actual fuck. You watched him standing confidently in his expensive velvet threads. A glorious, multi-talented giant he was. He worked flawlessly around his equipment. Conjuring soothing melodies with heavy bass drums that made you want to shake your ass a little. 

“So today I met this shorty. She was mmm. I don’t even know how to explain it. But anyway, I wrote this song about her. I’ll tell you the rest of the story on IG. Alright, let’s go!” 

“Ooh, I saw her and she hit me like (Tadow)

Saw that thing so beautiful (Tadow)

She just hit my heart, ooh (Tadow)

Full force and she got me like (Tadow)”

You smiled and partially covered your lips watching him sing passionately to the crowd. He pulled down his shades and walked towards the edge of the stage. Suddenly, his eyes locked with yours causing a subtle smirk to form on his lips. 

“I be like (Tadow)

Baby (Tadow)

Why you so fine? (Tadow, tadow)

Gotta make you mine (Tadow, tadow)

So hard to find (Tadow, tadow)”

He winked at you and walked back to his music station smoothly. You tore your eyes away from his gaze and smiled to yourself. You looked up once more witnessing him becoming consumed by his music - entirely lost in it. Subconsciously, you bit your lip and tilted your head out of curiosity. It was something about him that turned you on. You couldn’t decide if it was his swag, his vocals, his talent, or his wit but either way, he had your panties dampening from his sweet melodies. Pulling yourself back to reality you wondered if he really saw you or did you just want to be noticed? Could it be possible that this song was about you? No, it can’t be. You’re buzzed, just really really buzzed you reasoned with yourself. Breaking you from your spiraling thoughts, you felt someone grab your arm from behind. 

“C, I’ve been calling your phone all damn night! Why the fuck weren’t you answering?” Desmonde screamed with a concerned look on his face.

“I lost it! And Desmone you need to calm that tone down! I’m fine! Get off of me!” you yelled while snatching your arm away from him.

“How fucking long was that line to the bathroom?” you asked while looking him up and down.

“We should go,” he demanded

“We should.” you spat.

From the stage, Masego inquisitively raised an eyebrow watching the drama unfold between you and your boyfriend. You deserved better but if only you could see that. From his eyes, you were nothing shy of beautiful. Full lips, piercing dark brown eyes, mouth-watering curves, thick curly hair, and he loved the sound of your sweet, light airy voice. From the moment he heard it, he wanted to exercise your vocal cords in the best ways. He wanted nothing more than to cherish you and to pour back into what you lost. And maybe, if you would have him, you could show him what he lacks in this world of fame. After watching your quarrel with Desmonde, he decided that you needed a change of pace, a change of man, and a change of scenery and most importantly he wanted you. Correction, needed you. He had exactly two weeks to convince you, prove to you, and show you that he is worthy of your attention before heading to South Africa to finish the second leg of his tour.

“Alright, alright shut up. Too much new song,” Masego said jokingly as he continued his show.

------

*A few minutes prior*

“Well, this was fun,” Brittany said breathlessly.

“I gotta stop fucking you,” Desmonde said as he zipped up his pants.

“Tell that to your dick and not me,” she said as she fixed her makeup in the rearview mirror.

“This is the last time and I mean that shit,” he said sternly

“Uh-huh.” she answered nonchalantly.

“You don’t think I’m serious? Cause I am,” he responded.

“D, I know you love her. But you don’t love yourself, this is why you’re with me. This is why you’re doing what you do. Sure, you can stop fucking me. But there’s always going to be someone else.” she said as she added the finishing touches to her makeup.

Desmonde swallowed dryly taking in her brutal honesty.

“Why am I doing this? To myself? To her?” he thought.

“Don’t worry, I don’t judge. I’m not perfect either and in time I’ll face my demons but not tonight,” she said slyly.

“I’m going to catch the rest of the show. You might want to go head back to your girl,” she said before getting out of the car.

---------

An uncomfortable silence fell between you and Desmonde. The car ride home felt longer than usual. You cracked your window to let some fresh air inside. You felt like you were suffocating from the inside out. Everything around you seemed to intensify your irritation. Your tight dress, your high heels, the silence, and not to mention Des’ presence. 

“I’m sorry that I snapped at you earlier,” he said while keeping his eyes on the road.

“Why were you gone for so long?” you questioned.

“Honestly, I don’t know... and that’s the truth. I don’t know what I’ve been doing lately or who I am. And I’m sorry I’m so shitty to you.” he said lowly while his hands gripped the steering wheel.

He pulled into the apartment complex and sighed deeply. After he parked the car, he opened the passenger’s side door and opened it for you. With hesitation, you swung your right leg out of the vehicle and then the left.

“Charisma, I am so sorry,” he repeated. 

You swallowed and nodded as a response.

-------

A black satin bonnet covered your delicate curls and a white cotton oversized t-shirt covered your curvy frame. You rested your fatigued body on the cold queen-sized bed and waited for Desmonde to join you in the bedroom. Desmonde staggered to the bed after turning off the bathroom light. He plopped on the bed and grunted into his pillow. You inhaled his fresh scent and smiled at him.

“You drunk drunk?” you whispered.

A lazy smile crept upon his face and as he turned toward you.

“Drunk drunk.” he repeated.

“Des?” you replied while stroking his face.

“Yeah, baby?” he answered while kissing your fingertips lovingly.

“Are you really sorry? You mean that?” you quizzed.

“I am,” he admitted.

“I was thinking maybe we could - that maybe we should have...” you hinted.

“Sex?” he said in disbelief.

“It is my birthday….” you joked trying to ease the tension.

“Charisma.” he said while closing his eyes and bringing his hands over his face in frustration.

“Desmonde, please.” you croaked.

“We’re not as close as we used to be. I think we should try at least.” you continued.

“It’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you-”

“Then what is it?” you interrupted.

“I don’t deserve to touch you like that right now,” he admitted.

“Isn’t that left up to me?” you quizzed.

“I don’t wanna argue. Can you respect that?” he snapped.

You sat up quickly and pulled the covers off of you in utter disgust. You grabbed your pillow and your favorite multi-colored blanket.

“Desmonde can you just admit that you don’t love me anymore? I just need to hear you say it. I know the losing the baby changed everything.” you said lowly.

“Just tell me so I can move on. So you can move on.” you continued.

“I do love you! I love you Charisma … I just don’t know how to love you the right way.” he replied while hanging his head in defeat.

Before you knew it your cheeks were covered in tears. You aggressively wiped your face and nodded in acceptance.

“I’m going to sleep on the couch tonight. And Desmonde?” you paused. “I want you out of this apartment first thing in the morning and I mean that shit,” you said while closing the bedroom door.

-----

*Masego’s Video Post*

“Ok quick storytime. So I was checking into my hotel today. I seen this shorty and she was mmm mmm good. You feel me? Anyways, she’s looking at me and I’m looking at her right? Alright fast forward. So she’s bringing me towels that I didn’t ask for. Hold up rewind, I forgot to mention she works at the hotel. So anyway, she brings me these towels looking all gorgeous. And y’all know me, imma shoot that shot. So I did and I found out shorty had a boyfriend. And that sums up how “Tadow” came about. I made it right after I seen her.”

------

Part 1 Part 3

@l-auteuse @nizzle-mo @jamielennkeeler @thickemadame @ljstraightnochaser @pineappear @thadelightfulone @qweentbh @justanothernerdgirl @big-brows-bigger-dreams @ghostfacekill-monger​ @chaneajoyyy​ @soulfood-fics​ @miss-nneka​ @rosemilage @sarcastic-sunshines @mygirlrenee @keiva1000

[infernwetrust]

AHS 1984: Between The Lines [Xavier Plympton x Chet Clancy] 2. Upset Me

PART 1

Summary: A world before the horror. A world with some horrors. A fantasy world, where things are slightly normal. A world where Chet Clancy has been in a relationship with his long term girlfriend, Brooke Thompson. A world where Xavier Plympton, struggles to find himself after a dark past. But what if I told you that's not all who Chet is romantically involved with? What if I told you there’s a little bit more to Xavier than what he presents himself to be? What if I told you to read between the lines? Together we'll explore friendship, love, deceit, and sexuality on a different level.

Rated: R for Restricted. 18+ Very Mature Themes.

Warnings: Alright folks, I’m going to be very honest with you. This book can get dark and depressing sometimes. Due to it’s unpredictable nature, since it is a work in progress, read at your own discretion, and apply tags as you see them fit. I will be giving warnings at the beginning of chapters that do take it to that level. If you do choose to read and you come across anything that makes you uncomfortable, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I am all ears.

WC: 1.4k

"Did anyone remember to grab joint papers?" Chet asked. "I used my last one outside." A now, shirtless Chet, stood at the top of the stairs. He combed out his hair and was wearing a gold chain. His eyes scanned his rather large living room where his friends had spread out to their comfort. Except not really. Brooke had no problem laying against Xavier's side, his arm in the back of the sofa,while he was having a conversation with Ray.  

Xavier paused his sentence to turn his attention towards Chet who was now at the bottom of the steps. He couldn't help, but to glance over him one good time.. or twice.

"Montana said that she would bring hers if she remembered to, so we're just waiting on her." he spoke. "What's the rush? I'm sure you and Brooke here are high out of the ass."  

"And wouldn't you love to be too?"

"Why is that even a question?"

"Why do you ask so many questions?"

"Please don't start this." Brooke interjected. "I've dealt with your bromance long enough in high school."

"Seriously." Ray added on. "When are you two not going at each other's throats. And it's always for something stupid. And to top it off you start talking again like it never even happened."

"Total bullshit." Xavier directed towards Ray.

"Yeah what he said." Chet chimed in, lifting Brooke's legs up to sit down. He gently placed them on his lap and smiled at her before throwing his arm around the sofa, just a little higher than Xavier's.  

"You two argue like an old couple. It's kind of cute actually." Brooke spoke again. "Chet you should see your face when X mentions anything about sports."

"Because I know that he's only saying it to make me mad. I've known this kid since we were toddlers and he has never had interest in sports."

"False." Xavier interjected.

"Oh did I mention he thinks aerobics are a type of sport, when it's a type of exercise?"

"You're joking right?" Ray asked Xavier. Xavier stayed silent, avoiding eye contact with every single person in the room. Chet stared him down like a dog with a heavy smirk on his face.

"Go on." Chet said, slapping the back of Xavier's arm.

"Jesus Christ,  he's not joking."

"I hate you. You disgust me. And I hope you choke on the beer you decide to drink tonight." Xavier said to Chet, getting up without warning Brooke who's head was now where he once sat.

"A warning would of been nice."'she mumbled.

"Where are you going?" Chet asked trying to hold back his laugh. He was ignored as Xavier headed for the door, taking out a box cigarettes from his pocket.  

"You done did it now." Ray said to Chet.

"Oh fuck me..." Chet sighed, throwing his head back. "Xavier I didn't-,"

The door was already slammed shut.

"Fuck." Chet quickly got up, again, giving Brooke no warning, hustling out the door behind Xavier. He stood at the bottom of the porch steps, hand in his pocket, puffing on his cigarette. He looked over his shoulder slightly at Chet, who ran his hand through his hair.

"Xavi." he called out.

"You know, Clancy." Xavier spoke. "You don't do well at keeping your mouth shut."

"And neither do you." Chet joined him at the bottom of the steps and the two sat down. Xavier took another pull before passing the cigarette to Chet who gladly accepted. "A little nicotine never hurt anyone right?"

"A little nicotine?" Xavier jokingly asked, looking at Chet and grinning. "I wish, Chet. I've been smoking since I was 12. I'm so fucked up." He sighed, putting his head between his knees.

"Just smoke more weed."

"I can't afford to keep being high all the time."

"Bullshit. You want to be a big time actor. You can more than afford to keep being high all the time."

"Not on set. In a couple years that stuff is going to ruin your memory. I promise."

"You get on my nerves. Always trying to be so good, innocent, and pure. Always trying to spit some words of knowledge."  Chet punched him in the side of the arm. "But if you want to keep that pretty face of yours, you need to stop smoking cigarettes or at least try cutting back."

"This is coming from the guy that's done coke twice now."

"How did this become about me?" The two looked at each other and started laughing. "But, listen. I'm sorry. You told me not to tell anyone about that and I did. You can tell everyone about the time I pissed my pants in public."

"No." Xavier responded, softly. "I'm not going to do that. It's not the worst thing you know about me." Chet had to go way back into the memories he had with Xavier. He had too many. And then he remembered.

"Ooo, yeah. Let's not ever talk about that one."

"Ever."

Chet handed him back his cigarette for him to finish up, but instead of finishing it, he simply flicked it into the grass. Xavier cared about his face too much to finish it. This one at least.  He looked at Chet, who was now staring now at his hands, playing with his finger nails. He admired everything about him. From his hair, to his eyes, to his lips, and everything below. Xavier didn't want to admit this, but he liked Chet. He knew how fragile Chet's masculinity was, so he made sure to never push those buttons when he made his sexual jokes around his friends. A flirt, he was, but Chet made him feel small despite the small height difference.  

"Are we moving the party outside?" a well dressed Montana asked as she stood behind the gate, chewing her gum aggressively.

"It's about time you showed up."  Chet said. "I've been sobering up and I don't like it. Did you bring those papers?"

"Well it's nice to see you too, Chet." she responded, blowing a bubble. She stared her ex up and down. "Xavier."

"Demon that haunts my dreams." Xavier responded, rolling his eyes.

"You miss me."

"I hate you."

"You want to fuck me."

"I want to choke you."

"Are you guys dialogue fucking right now? I can feel the sexual tension in the air." Chet spoke.

"I rather die."  

"That's funny, Xavier. I swear you were moaning my name last week at your party."

"That was you two?!" Chet's jaw dropped. "I was wondering where you went Xavier. Anyone that stood at the bottom of the stairs could hear you guys. See I knew there was still some love there."

"Oh please. I was drunk, high, and horny and so was she. It was a mistake."

"Then why did you kiss me yesterday when I came to give you back your flannel that you haven't stopped bugging me about?"

"Fuck off, Montana." Xavier got up swiftly, eyeing her down.

"Make me."

"Okaaaay. I think I'm gonna go back inside." Chet said, also getting up. "When you two are done lusting, I hope you'll join us and not go fuck in the woods somewhere."

Xavier and Montana stared each other down as Chet made his way back inside and as soon as they heard that door slam they went after each other.

"Why are you such a bitch?" he asked her.

"Ugh. Why are you?" she asked back. "You get fucked up, coming knocking on my door or calling my house. You tell me you love me, fuck me senseless, and then you leave and start acting like this. And I thought I was the moody one in the group."

Xavier hung his head low for the second time tonight, laughing quietly to himself.

"And you're just going to leave out the part where you do the same? Where you show up to my door, crying over me? Where you literally beg me to fuck you all the time and get livid when I say no? Right. Montana, please go fuck yourself."

"You already do that."

"Yeah, not anymore." He turned around to head back in the house.

"You won't last. You miss me too much."

"I'll hope for the day when you're not so full of yourself, sweety."

"Coming from the guy who thinks his face is worth billions of dollars."

"I'm gonna pretend like you didn't just say that. Now come on, let's go inside."

Toxic. But we'll examine that next chapter.