#I’ve cried three times in 63 pages

[fynneyseas]

I’m being so so brave right now. I’m halfway through reading Tadek and the Princess by Alexandra Rowland and I’ve only cried like three times. Be so impressed.

[myheartrevealedocs]

Untouchable - Ch 7: The Fisher King: Part 2 (S2E1)

Summary:  A Spencer Reid x OC fanfic that retells select episodes, starting in season 1, from the point of view of Lydia Ambers, a forensic scientist.

Warnings: mentions of death, swearing, death threats, graphic injuries

Ch 6 | Ch 8

~ ~ ~

When Lydia got back to the conference room, Spencer was the only one there. He stood directly in front of the whiteboard, murmuring to himself. He’d written ‘Possible Book Titles’ across the top, but so far had nothing listed.

“The rest of the team leave you to figure this out on your own?” she asked.

He startled slightly, not having heard her walk in. “Um, JJ and Morgan are going to interview Rebecca Bryant’s parents… and Hotch and Gideon are interviewing the guy who brought the numbers to Haley.”

“Someone found him?”

“He turned himself in,” Spencer explained. “So, now it’s just me and the evidence boards.”

“Now it’s us and the evidence boards,” she corrected. She sat down and picked up the medication bottle from the table. “Sorry I stormed out.”

“Sorry you were so stressed,” he mumbled. “We didn’t mean to push you.”

“You didn’t. It was important for you to know. I’m just… so done with this, you know?” She stopped herself. “Sorry, of course you do. You were on vacation when you got these weird messages. I was just home doing my schoolwork.”

“Lydia, stop apologizing,” he argued. “This is very stressful, we’ve all been here a long time, and you got a package delivered to your door. I can easily understand why that’d freak you out.”

She shrugged. “I just feel like I should be able to piece together these clues the unsub’s giving us and I can’t.”

“I know exactly what you mean,” he agreed, indicating to his empty list.

She looked over the label on the bottle in her hands. There was a patient name, a doctor’s name, drug, and an RX number. Prescription bottles always had more than that. They had instructions, pharmacies, manufacturers, fill dates, expiration dates.

“This number must mean something,” she wondered out loud. “He didn’t put any unnecessary information on it, but there’s a long RX number.”

“Read the number out loud,” Spencer told her.

He wrote it across the board as she went. “3-1-5-1-2-1-2-5-3-2-0-1-5-1-8”

“Okay,” he stepped back. “We can start with the basics. A equals 1, Z equals 26.” He got to work, writing the corresponding letter underneath the number.

C-A-E-A-B-A-B-E-C-B-

He stopped at the zero. “That’s definitely not a word. But some of the letters have double digits, so… let’s see if we combine everything we can combine…’C’ stays the same. The 1 and 5 could be fifteen, which is ‘O’...” He began again.

C-O-L-L-E-C-T-O-R

“Collector?” He stepped away. “That mean anything to you?”

Lydia shook her head.

“Alright. Collector. Collecting things. He’s collecting things.” He snapped his fingers so sharply Lydia almost jumped. “Collector! Baseball cards, music boxes, butterflies, skeleton keys. These are all things people collect!”

“That can’t be a coincidence, can it?”

He shrugged. It was basically impossible at this point to rule anything out.

“Medieval,” she rambled. “Collectable things. Numerical codes. What else have we got?”

“We’ve got this note from the music box?” he offered. “I think I’ve heard it somewhere, but I can’t place it… And I think the book was published in 1963.”

“Why’s that?”

“That’s the year on the baseball card, but it’s not the year Gideon went to all those games. If the unsub knows Gideon likes Nellie Fox because he went to almost all the White Sox games in 1959, why give him a ‘63 card?”

“Okay,” Lydia agreed. “So, the type of butterfly JJ got, that probably means something too, because she collected butterflies, not pale clouded yellow butterflies.

He nodded. “Let’s get Garcia to look up some of these things and see if we find anything.”

She followed him out as he dashed towards Garcia’s office. He was very stiff and awkward when he was in a rush, she noticed, but he refused to run through the office. She was glad for it at the moment, seeing as with her foot, she probably couldn’t keep up with him, but it was almost comical, the way his feet skipped underneath him with repressed anticipation.

Garcia looked up when they walked in, then turned back to her computers. “This guy is infuriatingly good. He routed his IP through major corporations, crisscrossed it through countries, bounced it off satellites-”

“I thought you already tracked the hacker,” Spencer said, pausing behind her and glancing over her shoulder.

“No, I only found what he wanted me to find,” she huffed. “Apartment where Giles was dead. Reid, a hacker capable of getting into my systems is going to have amazingly sophisticated equipment. Did Giles’s apartment have that?”

“He didn’t have a couch,” he responded.

“Exactly. Giles was a smokescreen I should have seen through. But now I have this glorious program I wrote, tracking the hacker through his other identity: Sir Kneighf.”

“Sir Kneighf?” he cried.

Lydia’s eyes widened. “The doctor on the prescription bottle!”

“The what?��� Garcia flipped her chair around and Reid leaned over to see the name on her screen

“K-N-E-I-G-H-F. That’s an odd spelling.”

She waved him away. “Do you need something?”

“Yeah, is there a database, which lists all the books published in a given year?”

“Individual publishers have lists, but I don’t think there’s anything like a master one. Plus it would depend upon the year, because the further back you go, the less likely there’ll be any database at all.”

“1963.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, ok, that would be an example of extremely less likely.”

He hummed in contemplation. “Could you do me a favor? Type something into a search engine for me?” She pulled herself back up to the keyboard. “‘Never would it be night, but always clear day to any man’s sight’.”

“Okay, that’s from a poem, ‘The Parliament of-’”

“Fowls!” He jumped in recognition. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Chaucer! My-” He hesitated. “My mom used to read me that. It’s widely considered as the first Valentine’s poem.”

Garcia chuckled. “Your mom read you Valentine’s poems? Hello, therapy.”

Lydia smacked her over the shoulder.

“Chaucer. Chaucer. ‘Parliament of Fowls’.” He began mumbling to himself again, trying to fit pieces together. “It has to be at least 283 pages long. Something published in 1963… A butterfly indigenous to Great Britain. Why? Something born. Something from Great Britain… Medieval. Chaucer. Chaucer was Middle English. Middle English spelling of the word Fowls… F-O-W-L-E-S…”

Lydia thought he was losing it, but somehow, this rambling was productive, because he blinked and ran back over to Garcia’s side.

“There- There was a contemporary british author-- Fowles. John Fowles. Will you type it into a search engine?”

“Uh… He wrote The Magus, he wrote The French Lieutenant’s Woman-”

“Anything in 1963 published in Great Britain?”

She narrowed her search and her computer started beeping. “Yeah. The Collector.”

Lydia wanted to scream. Finally, they were on the right path. “Are you serious? The code on the bottle was the book title.”

Garcia clicked on the book and the cover photo showed up, which ruled out any chances of the book being a coincidence. Three objects were displayed underneath the title of the book: a butterfly, a skeleton key, and a blonde lock of hair.

“I’m gonna start calling libraries. We need a copy of that book immediately,” Lydia said, leaving abruptly.

~ ~ ~

“Hello, my name is Lydia Ambers, I work for the FBI. We’re in desperate need of a very specific book to help us on a recent case. We’re looking for a copy of The Collector by John Fowles, but it has to be a copy that was published by Jonathon Cape. Would you have any of those?”

Lydia followed Reid and Garcia to one of the interrogation rooms, to talk to Hotch and Gideon about their findings, but she was thoroughly distracted by her call and ended up stepping on their heels a few times accidentally.

“According to our database, we should have two copies, but it’s going to take me a while to search for them. Can I call you back once I’ve found a copy?”

“Yes, thank you.” She hung up and promptly tripped, falling between Reid and Garcia’s shoulders. She would have run directly into Gideon if Reid hadn’t grabbed her by the arm and held her up steady. “Sorry!”

She shuffled back behind her two friends and let them talk to Hotch and Gideon.

“We know what the book is,” Spencer explained. “The Collector by John Fowles.”

“You sure?” Gideon demanded. They were both clearly on edge. Hotch had his arms crossed which didn’t look comfortable in his suit and Gideon was punchy. She didn’t fail to notice the way he and Garcia avoided each other's gazes, Garcia more than him. He was still pissed at her and she was probably thoroughly embarrassed. And hopefully, a little pissed too, because Lydia believed he’d been way too harsh on her.

“Not absolutely. Not until we see if the code works, but Lydia’s called four separate libraries to search for the 1963 edition published in Great Britain.”

“Well done,” Hotch complimented the group, tiredly.

“Agent Gideon,” a woman called, approaching the group of them, “there’s a call for you on line two. Says it’s extremely urgent.” 

“Is there a name?” he asked.

“Sort of. He calls himself the Fisher King.”

Lydia groaned before she could stop herself. Everyone raised an eyebrow at her.

“Sorry. The Fisher King is the one who guards the Grail. You know, the one that ‘Sir Percival’, over there is supposed to find.” She pointed at Reid, who was grabbing the notepad the woman had in her hands.

“This could be the unsub, guys,” he confirmed. “‘Sir Kneighf’ is an anagram for Fisher King.”

“The Fisher King is at the end of all Grail quests,” Gideon agreed.

They rushed to the bullpen, all crowding around a nearby phone.

“Line two trapped and traced,” Hotch demanded of one of the nearby agents and Gideon put it on speaker.

“Gideon.”

“What I had to do was not my fault,” the unsub replied, his harsh voice unmistakable.

“Excuse me?”

“It was distasteful and barbaric.”

“Who is this?”

“No one else had to be hurt.”

“Call yourself ‘The Fisher King’?” He was trying to throw the unsub off his rhythm. Gideon had been training her to speak to hostile people and profile what responses to give them, so she followed along his game.

This guy had clearly planned what he wanted to say and expected them to shut up and listen. If Gideon made him interrupt the strict script in his mind, he might slip up and give information he didn’t want to or forget his point.

“I told you there were rules.”

“I’m actually more interested in exactly how you got all those burns.” Different tactic. Make the unsub think we’re closer to catching him than he thinks.

“Remember this next time you decide to step outside my instructions,” he warned. “Agent Greenaway did not have to die like that.”

The phone buzzed as he hung up the call.

~ ~ ~

After many attempts at calling Elle, Hotch got ahold of Agent Anderson, who was in charge of taking her home. Anderson explained that Elle had been shot and the ambulance was on its way to a nearby hospital. And then, he and Gideon were off, leaving Lydia, Spencer, and Garcia to work on piecing together this mystery.

“Mrs. Valez, are you there?” Reid asked, putting the librarian who’d just called them back on speaker phone.

“Yes, Dr. Reid. I am. I have a first edition of The Collector, published in Great Britain in 1963.”

“Wonderful.” As they spoke Garcia cleared off room on the whiteboard to copy down the code. “Mrs. Valez, I’m going to read you a set of three numbers. The first is going to be a page number, the second a line number on that page, and the third, a word number in that line. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, I understand.”

“All right, the first is page 222.”

“Page 222, got it.”

“Line 23.”

“Line 23. Got it.”

“What is the 16th work on that line, Ms. Valez?”

“The.”

“The,” he repeated. “Great.”

Garcia wrote it up on the board and Lydia suddenly very much regretted not going along with Gideon and Hotch. But just in time to save the day, her phone started going off with a call from the unit chief.

She dismissed herself quickly and stepped outside to answer.

“How’s Elle?” she asked, figuring greetings could be dismissed for the time being.

“She’s in surgery. Ambers, I need you to go to her house and look for any evidence you can find. And if you can, I need you to tell me what exactly happened when she got home. Anderson will meet you there.”

“Yes, sir. I’ll get back to you when I have something.”

She quietly signalled to Reid that she was leaving before grabbing her FBI windbreaker and latex gloves and running off to the elevator. She hadn’t taken a company SUV since her first case (after which she learned she wasn’t supposed to be driving them on her own because she wasn’t supposed to be unsupervised while working), but she figured that, if caught, she would be forgiven, given the circumstances.

The street was littered with cop cars by the time she got there and it took a minute for them to recognize the car and jacket she was wearing and let her through. Once she had parked, she ran across the front lawn and inside, looking for Anderson. Right now, the only reason she hadn’t been thrown off the scene was her jacket and until Anderson arrived with his badge and the orders to clear the place, she was at the local PD’s mercy.

“Excuse me, miss,” a man called to her as she walked into the living room. She shut her eyes tightly. Damn it.

“Hi. My name’s Lydia-”

“Ambers,” Anderson greeted her, stepping past the cops to speak to her. “CSU’s on the way, but Hotch wanted you to survey the scene before they processed it.” He turned back to the officer she was just speaking to. “Hello again, Detective Markes. I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask your team to leave, as you’re currently on a crime scene under federal jurisdiction.”

As he went on to argue with the detective, Lydia flipped around to make her initial determinations. Elle had lost a lot of blood. Lydia could assume she’d been shot in the abdomen, because it was the only area of the body where she could survive long enough to get to the hospital and into surgery while she was losing blood at that rate. Elle had a comforted seat built into an indent in the wall where the blood trail started.

The coffee table was awkwardly placed in the center of the room, so the paramedics probably moved it to get to her. And from the marks on the carpet, it looks like they had to drag her body onto its back in order to perform CPR. Then, there was the looming note on her wall in blood: RULES.

“Can I do anything to help?” Anderson asked. When Lydia looked up at him, it was clear to her that he’d been crying. His eyes were rimmed with red and his voice was shaky.

“Did the police tell you what happened?”

He nodded, rubbing his forehead tiredly. “There is evidence of forced entry on the back door. The unsub probably broke in and waited for her to get home before he shot her. She dialed 911 herself before she passed out. And her badge and gun are nowhere to be found.”

“She dialed 911 before she passed out?!” Lydia exclaimed. “Unless the unsub let her… but no, he thought she was dead. He was in the room with her and wrote in her-” Lydia took in a deep breath and started to put her gloves on. “Try something with me, Anderson.”

~ ~ ~

“What did you find?”

“CSU lifted a partial print from the unsub’s message,” Lydia told Hotch, driving back to Quantico.

“What message?”

“Rules,” she responded. “This is about the press conference.”

He sighed. “Did they get anything from the print?”

“They aren’t sure if it will be enough, but they’re running it through their systems now.”

“Good. And what did you find?”

Lydia’s breath hitched. “Me?”

“I asked you if you could figure out what happened. How did the unsub get the upper hand and shoot Elle?”

Lydia glanced at her phone, which was on speaker beside her, as if Hotch would be there looking sternly back.

“Here’s my theory,” she began. “We know he broke in through the back door and waited in the house. If he was in the dining room, he would have been able to hear her set her stuff down and lie on the couch. Now with her eyes closed, he’s able to walk into the room and aim a gun at her before she can react. At some point, Elle makes a move off the couch and he shoots her. The blood pattern indicates she was falling when she got hit. That makes me think her gun was on the table across from her. But anyway, she’s shot and is lying on her side, between the seat and the table. Elle has got to have an insanely high pain tolerance, because she was still conscious when he wrote on the walls in her blood. But somehow, she had him convinced she had died when he left. Then, she calls 911 and passes out.”

“Good work, Lydia. When all this is over, we need to talk.”

Her phone beeped to indicate he had hung up and it took everything in her not to pull over and call him back immediately.

A talk? What the hell did that mean?

~ ~ ~

When Lydia finally made her way back to the bullpen, she was exhausted. So, it was a bit of a relief to see Spencer there at his desk, simply toying with a pencil between his fingers.

“Did you go to Elle’s house?” he asked, softly, as she took off her jacket and placed it on her desk.

“Yeah… It’s a crime scene.”

He nodded, understanding what she meant. It was bloody.

“How did the book code go? Did it work?” she inquired.

“‘The path to the end began at his start to find her first calm her long broken heart’,” he recited. “‘She sits in a window with secrets from her knight. Is it adventure that keeps him out of her sight?’”

“Any clue what it means?”

Reid opened his mouth to explain, but Garcia approached and started talking to him. “She’s okay,” she said, sitting on the edge of his desk. “Your mom. Agents picked her up.”

“Your mom?” Lydia startled. “What happened?”

The panic in Garcia’s eyes was evident. “Lydia! Sorry, I didn’t even realize you were back yet.” Her eyes darted between the two of them. “I’ll… I’m gonna go now.”

“No, no, no!” she assured her. “It’s fine. If this is private, I can leave.”

“It’s not private.” Spencer looked slightly amused by the anxiety both girls felt, but it didn’t last long. “It’s… pertinent to the case.”

“Is everything okay?” Lydia asked him, standing up next to Garcia at his desk, so that the conversation didn’t drift around the room.

“She’s flying here right now,” Garcia explained, and Reid nodded, looking down at an evidence bag.

It was the poem they’d found in the music box. The valentine’s one that he’d said his mom read him.

“I forgot she used to always read me this poem.” He sighed. “It’s funny, huh?”

“Funny?” Garcia asked.

“I should have realized this sooner,” he admitted. “I mean, nobody knows things like the fact that JJ collects butterflies except for me. People tell me their secrets all the time. I think it’s ‘cause they know I don’t have anyone to betray them to… except my mother. I- I tell her pretty much everything.”

“I don’t think anyone would mind,” she grinned.

“Do you know that I write her a letter everyday?” he continued.

Garcia’s eyes watered slightly, but her smile didn’t let up. “That’s nice.”

“It depends on why I write her.” His eyebrow furrowed. His demeanor had changed considerably and Lydia started to piece together what she had missed.

This unsub had gotten all this info on them from his mom. Maybe he’d been stealing her letters or just talking to her, but he knew her and that’s why Reid was bringing her to Quantico.

“What do you mean?” Garcia asked.

“I write her letters so I won’t feel so guilty about not visiting her.”

The girls exchanged a look. Reid had just been in Las Vegas. He said he was going home. So, why was he claiming he didn’t visit her?

“Did you know that schizophrenia is genetically passed?” he asked, randomly.

At least, she thought it was random. Until Garcia gasped under her breath. She excused herself quickly, leaving Lydia with the fidgeting doctor.

“Spencer, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” she spoke up. She kept her voice low and her town concerned, undemanding.

He was clearly on edge. He wouldn’t look up at her, eyes focused on the poem in his hands. “‘The path to the end begins at his start’... I’m the ‘him’. And my start is my mom. So, she’s the key to lead us to the Grail. ‘She sits in a window with secrets from her knight’. The doctors tell me my mother loves to sit by the window and read my letters.” He dropped the bag suddenly and clasped his hands together. “Lydia, my mom is a paranoid schizophrenic who lives in a mental hospital.”

His knuckles started turning white and the muscles in his arms shifted under pressure. He was getting tense. Lydia knew exactly what he was doing. Normally, when she felt her anger manifest itself physically, she would excuse herself to blow off steam, but something told her Reid wasn’t about to find an empty hallway and start punching the walls.

But even with that knowledge, she never would have consciously done what she did to calm him. Her impulses took over and one of her hands reached out and settled itself on top of his fists. She bent down slightly, not forcing herself into his line of sight, but making it easier for him to turn to her.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “That must be hard on you… does the rest of the team know?”

He shook his head, turning one of his palms over to hold onto her fingers. Lydia’s heart sped up, but she swallowed down her feelings. He was looking for comfort, not a relationship. Besides, they weren’t even holding hands, really. He was just grazing his thumbs over her knuckles.

“Lydia,” he began, finally meeting her gaze. “Earlier you left because Hotch brought up your mom…”

Here it comes. She braced herself for the inevitable question.

“...and when you came back, you had bruised knuckles.”

She almost choked on her own saliva. He wasn’t going to ask about her mom? And how had he even noticed that?

Awkwardly, she slipped her fingers out of his grasp. “I wasn’t hitting anything alive, if that’s what you’re worried about,” she informed him, suddenly closing off again. “I just had to let off some steam.”

“Lydia, I wasn’t insinuating anything-”

“It’s fine, Spencer,” she replied, far too quickly. “If you need any help with anything before your mom gets here, let me know. And if I get any updates from Hotch or Gideon, I’ll tell you.”

He spun his chair around in an attempt to stop her, but she was already leaving, trying to look dignified as she walked into the conference room. She didn’t want to make him feel guilty when he was already dreading his mom’s arrival, but she couldn’t have that conversation when there was work to do.

It wasn’t until she was staring at the evidence boards that she realized, there really wasn’t any work to do.

What was she running from?

~ ~ ~

After hours of pacing and repeating the clues the unsub had given them outloud, Lydia had ended up back at her desk, absolutely drained. She pushed everything aside and lay her head down. She’d just been… off today. 

She felt so guilty about abandoning Spencer. He needed more help than she did. His mother was involved in a murder case and probably wasn’t stable enough to look out for herself. And Lydia was just wallowing in her past.

She had no right to do that to him.

So, what was it? As far as she knew, Spencer didn’t even know her mom was dead. He had no idea what the mention of her mother could do to her. He wasn’t pressuring her to tell him about it. And even more so, she’d never struggled to tell anyone her mother was dead before. Her first day in Quantico, she told Gideon and Garcia.

Lydia rarely talked about the cause of her mom’s death. If that’s what the team needed to know, then she could forgive herself for being on edge, but they didn’t. No one had asked her to say out loud how her mother had died. And if they did need to know, Hotch, Gideon, or Garcia could probably tell them. Her mother’s death was definitely in Garcia’s files.

What is it? She asked herself. What’s wrong with you? Why can’t you just-?

“Lydia!” Garcia cried. Her head shot up to watch the blonde woman running by, making a beeline for the conference room.

She ran after her, just catching up as she opened the door and grabbed the attention of Spencer and an older woman with a pixie cut.

“Reid, I got to the end of the IP string,” Garcia started, barely even noticing the other presence in the room. “Sir Kneighf? The Fisher King? His name is Randal Garner. He’s Rebecca Bryant’s biological father.”

~ ~ ~

Once the air in the room had settled, Spencer introduced the other woman as his mother, Diana Reid, before quickly distracting them with work. Lydia sensed that he didn’t want his mother to be a part of the conversation.

Lydia stepped aside to call Hotch, listening to their conversation as she explained to him what they’d found.

“Our file says that Rebecca’s father’s name is Joseph Bryant,” Spencer argued. “Who’s Randal Garner?”

“Rebecca’s mother and brothers died in a fire when she was four and her father was so badly burned that he couldn’t take care of her, so he gave up parental rights and she was adopted by the Bryants,” Garcia informed them.

“Okay,” Hotch responded over the phone, pulling her back to the conversation she was having. “I’ll tell Gideon and be there soon. Find out everything you can on this guy.”

“Doing that as we speak,” she replied, putting her phone back into her pocket.

“I can’t believe she’s real,” Diana mumbled.

The three of them trained their eyes on her.

“What do you mean?” Garcia asked.

“Whenever he talked about Rebecca, he never said she was his daughter.” She said all this directly to her son, her stance nervous, almost defensive. “He said all his children died in the fire. He spoke of a Rebecca, more in the abstract. I really thought she was a metaphor and not an actual human being. An ideal.”

“A grail,” Reid said, confirming her thoughts. This man honestly didn’t see her as his daughter anymore. His daughter had died. And this girl was a prize to be won. “He thinks he’s the Fisher King.”

“Who does?” Morgan asked, entering with JJ.

“Randal Garner, our unsub,” Spencer responded.

“He believes you’re all modern-day knights of the round table,” Diana explained, gesturing around the room.

Derek raised a hand and they could see his question about who this woman was coming a mile away.

“Uh, Derek Morgan, this is my mother, Diana Reid.” Spencer ran around the table to step between his colleague and his mom.

“This is your mother?” He pointed at the woman almost accusingly, but seeing Spencer’s tight smile, pulled back and said, “Ma’am it’s a… it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Finally, the last of their group stormed in, Hotch’s footsteps audible from across the bullpen. “So, where are we on finding this son of a bitch?” he demanded.

“Gideon?” Lydia inquired.

“Hospital.”

Everyone sat down around the table in time with one another.

“I rechecked all the clues,” Spencer began. “There’s nothing that points to an address.”

“The adoption records for Rebecca listed an address of the fire, so I made a call to Nevada, and it’s vacant. No one ever rebuilt,” JJ continued.

“Nevada?” Hotch scoffed. “So we don’t even know what state he’s in?”

“I’ll search the tax records,” Garcia offered. “See if he owns any property.”

“Excuse me,” Diana said, catching the attention of the team. She was leaning forward in her seat in the corner of the room.

“Mom, do you want to wait out-” Spencer started, trying to usher her out of the room, but She was already making a move towards Hotch.

“Just before the agents got me from the hospital,” she fumbled for something in her purse, “a man delivered this to me. It’s a photo of a house with an address on the back.”

She held it up for them to see the scrawl on the back of the card: 1024 Winston Dr., Shiloh, VA. 22485.

“Shiloh, Virginia?” Morgan muttered. “That’s only ten miles from here.”

She flipped over the photo. The house looked more like a castle, with multiple stories and barred windows. It was made with gray bricks and black roof tiles with a circular extension that looked like a tower.

The team filed out quickly, with the exception of Spencer, who was telling his mom to stay put until he got back.

Garcia ran back to her office and Lydia sat at her desk, still unable to go on raids with them.

Almost over, she told herself. This whole thing is almost over.

~ ~ ~

“We’re sending Rebecca to the hospital now and then we’ll be back,” Hotch informed her. “Any news from Gideon?”

“Elle just got out of surgery. Doctors say she’s gonna be fine.” It was already the next morning and Lydia couldn’t wait to go back to her apartment and sleep for the rest of the day. “Randal Garner?”

“Dead,” he responded and Lydia didn’t bother to ask how or why. “Why don’t you start clearing off those evidence boards?”

“Yes, sir.” She put her phone down and walked up to the round table room.

When she got inside, she startled to see someone else there. Spencer’s mom sat on the sofa underneath the window and was writing something in one of the journals she brought with her. She hadn’t seemed to notice Lydia walk in.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Reid,” Lydia started, politely, walking over to the evidence boards. “I forgot you were still here.”

After a second of silence, Lydia got to work, making piles of evidence, pictures, and all the pins they had used. She didn’t take the woman’s silence personally, knowing that schizophrenia could cause dissociation. She figured she’d leave her to her journaling for now.

As she was finishing up, however, the woman looked up at her, an eyebrow raised. “Is it time for lunch yet?” she inquired.

“What?” Lydia asked softly.

“I’m lecturing everyone on Tristan and Iseult,” she explained, scanning her journal suddenly like an analysis paper. “They’re all gathering in my room after lunch.”

Lydia was intrigued. Clearly, Diana was not in touch with reality and Lydia wasn’t sure how best to deal with it, but her curiosity won over her common sense.

She wanted to know who Tristan and Iseult were.

“I’m here to attend the lecture, ma’am.” She smiled and sat down on the floor, like a kindergartener.

“Let’s get started, then.” She went on to talk about the basis of the myth: Tristan was sent to bring Iseult back to his uncle, King Mark of Cornwell, with whom she was to marry. On their journey however, they consumed a love potion (whether or not they were aware had varied throughout history) and fell for one another. They were forced to have an affair behind Mark’s back, despite them both holding a lot of respect for the king, because the effects of the potion were too strong for them to ignore. When the king caught them, he sentenced them both to death, but Tristan escaped and saved Iseult and they ran off together. When King Mark finally found them again, Tristan agreed to give Iseult back to the king and flee Cornwell so long as neither of them would be harmed. And eventually, he found another young woman named Iseult and married her instead.

Diana was just beginning to explain how this compared the Arthurian legend and the love triangle between King Arthur, Sir Lancelot, and Guinevere, when Spencer walked in.

“Mom, we found her. Rebecca’s safe.” The two women turned their heads to the newcomer and Spencer flushed, seeing Lydia sitting quietly on the floor across from his mother. “Lydia! I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“Young man, we are in the middle of a lecture,” she reprimanded. “May I ask why you’ve so rudely interrupted us?”

Lydia covered her mouth to suppress a laugh and Spencer looked shocked by his mother’s scolding. “What?”

“I am giving a lecture on Tristan and Iseult,” she repeated, impatiently. “Are you here to attend or do you want to just keep standing there and gawking?”

He seemed to understand his mother’s headspace, but his confusion returned when he remembered Lydia. She gestured for him to sit with her, smugly, and turned back to Diana. “You can continue Mrs. Reid, he was just late.”

“Has he read any of the material?” she asked, suspiciously.

Lydia raised an eyebrow at Spencer, teasing him despite the fact that she definitely had not read whatever it was that Diana would have previously assigned.

His face was gentle, almost unsure, and slowly he sat down besides Lydia. “I’ve had them read to me.”

Lydia knew he was talking about his mother. He’d grown up listening to her read valentine’s poems and old mythology. It was honestly really touching and she wondered if she should leave them to have a moment together but couldn’t bring herself to get up.

“Wonderful,” Diana sighed. “That’s the best way, isn’t it?”

“Yes, ma’am. By far.”

They sat there for a few more minutes, listening to her thoughts and analysis of different versions of the story. Lydia would glance over at him at times, checking to see if he was still smiling, which he always was. Sometimes he’d catch her in the act and they’d share a look of amusement before turning their focus back to their temporary teacher.

Unfortunately, it had to come to a sudden end when Hotch walked in.

“Ambers.” His tone was serious. “I was worried you’d left. I need to speak with you.”

Lydia could see Diana’s frustration at yet another interruption, so she quickly stood up.

“You’ll have to excuse me, Mrs. Reid,” she apologized, shuffling out behind her boss.

He nodded for her to follow him to his office. Was this about what he said earlier? They needed to have a talk?

She wondered if it was possibly the fact she took out an SUV again despite being informed not to after the last time. Or it could be about her harsh comments that morning towards Gideon and around Haley. Or even worse, about her mom and how she stormed away.

She sat across from him, waiting for his exasperated voice to come through, but it didn’t.

“Lydia, I think we need to have a discussion about your future,” he started, unexpectedly. “I created an internship into the team for you because we’ve never had the need for a forensics expert before, but for these past several months, you’ve been an incredible help. You’re knowledgeable in crime scene analysis, lab work, and, as you proved today, profiling. So, I’ve brought you here to tell you that I’ve discussed with Chief Strauss the possibility of giving you a full-time job in the BAU and she has agreed to speak with you and myself about creating you a position as a government contractor. You can’t apply to be an agent until you’re 23, but I want to be able to lift the restrictions on you and have your help on the cases I see as necessary. If Strauss likes you, you’ll be allowed to make calls for yourself, carry a badge, take the gun qualifications tests, and work without agent supervision, which if she asks, you haven’t been doing already. Would you be interested in such a position?”

She blinked, completely floored by the offer. “Agent Hotchner, I… wait, ‘proved today’?”

It was not what she wanted to say in the moment, but it had thrown her off slightly.

“Today, you walked onto a crime scene and told me an hour later exactly what had happened. You could identify when and from where the unsub entered the room, how Elle was positioned when she got shot, and what happened between then and her call to 911. Yes, I asked you to go there as a scientist and to look for evidence, but when I asked what you thought had happened, you became a profiler and you’re clearly fit to join the team. Again, you becoming a profiler is something we can discuss but not act on for another year, so hopefully contracted work is okay with you.”

“Okay with me?” she laughed. “That sounds amazing. So, just like I’ve been doing in the past, I’ll only be called in when you want me on a case and not for any office work?”

He nodded. “This is dependent on Strauss’s approval, but yes, that’s what we discussed.”

Lydia grinned. “So, how does one get Strauss’s approval?”

~ ~ ~

Lydia didn’t get back to her apartment until around 6 AM and promptly slept for most of the day. She was startled awake by her ringtone in the early afternoon and prepared herself for Hotch to ask her to come back in, but it wasn’t him. Interestingly enough, it was Spencer whose name popped up on her screen.

“Hello?” she answered, sitting back against her headboard.

“Hey, Lydia. Sorry, I’m sure you’re still exhausted after everything. I would have waited a few days to call you, but if I don’t do this now, I’m not sure I ever will.”

Her eyebrows knit together. “Is everything alright, Spencer? Did you make it to Las Vegas okay?”

By the time she’d finished talking with Hotch, Spencer had left with his mom and she’d heard that he was planning to fly with her back to the sanitarium, because she had a fear of planes. After everything, she expected him to stay with his mother for a few days, so she hadn’t thought she’d be hearing from him anytime soon.

“Yes, I’m fine. I’ll be back in DC tomorrow. But I have something to admit to you. I didn’t realize this earlier, but I know why Randal Garner sent you what he did.”

Lydia’s breath hitched. “What do you mean? Have you… did Garcia tell you?”

How did he know? Maybe he’d just guessed with the whole scene she made about the bupropion. Garcia had told her that she wouldn’t spill any of her secrets. But would Hotch or Gideon tell him what happened to her mom?

“What? Garcia didn’t tell me anything. I think you should wait for me to explain, so that you don’t accidentally tell me something you don’t want me to know.” His tone was joking, but there was a wavering nervousness that she could hear over the line. “Lydia, when you worked that poisoning case… on the jet back the whole rest of the team was asleep and you had a conversation with Hotch. You said that seeing an orange prescription bottle made you angry because it reminded you of your mother… I overheard that.”

She waited a minute for him to go on. She thought for certain he was going to say he’d figured her whole past out. He was going to tell her that he’d profiled her fidgets and glances and found out every last detail of her mom’s death, but he didn’t. That was all.

“That’s okay, Spencer,” she reassured him. “It wasn’t… I’m not keeping secrets from the team, I just don’t really like to talk about it.”

She faintly heard him huff, frustratedly. “No, I mean, the unsub got all this information on us from my mom. From all the stuff I’d tell her about my team… I told her about you,” he admitted. “I told her about how I’d overheard that conversation and I’m so sorry that you had to go through all this because of me.”

Lydia’s fingers ghosted lightly over her face as she processed this and shut her eyes tightly. It didn’t bother her as much as she’d thought it would, in fact, she didn’t seem to mind at all. The only thing on her mind when he said that was her stupid crush and the fact that he’d been writing to his mom about her.

She shook it aside. He talked about the whole team. It wasn’t a big thing. But… the unsub had, in his fantasy, assigned them two characters who were in love…

“I really appreciate the thought Spencer, but this isn’t your fault. I never said anything to Hotch about the bupropion, so you couldn’t have known about that. The unsub probably just did some research on me or looked through my files. Even if he chose the bottle because of your letters, he had everything else to torment me. Please don’t put this on yourself or your mom.”

He hesitated. “Are you sure you don’t hate me?”

“I can change my mind if you’d prefer,” she laughed.

He joined her for a moment, but fell silent far too fast. Lydia suddenly racked her brain for whatever she’d done to cause him to freeze, but hadn’t come up with anything before he spoke up again.

“Hey, Lydia? When I get back to DC, do you, uh… want to get something to eat?”

Lydia’s heart stopped. She wasn’t a profiler and definitely not an expert on asking people out, but she wasn’t about to let this crush rot in her brain. These past few days were torture enough. “You mean, like a date?” she prompted.

Bad move on her part. He flipped suddenly trying to deny it and she had to interrupt him before he hung up on her in mortification. He was so flustered she wasn’t even sure he was speaking English.

“Spencer. Spencer!”

He tried to mumble a quick apology, but she wasn’t about to let him close off just like that.

“Spencer, I’m not going to get food with you unless it’s a date. I don’t play mind games like that.”

“You wha- So, you’d like to- I’m sorry, it’s just… Mind games?” he finally spit out.

He was a funny one. She couldn’t believe she’d fallen so quickly for some dork. When she was a kid and all the other girls would ask her ‘What do you want your future boyfriend to be like?’ she never recalled saying, ‘A real mess. Just a true goof.’

“Yes, Spencer,” she responded. “Mind games. Getting food together could easily be misinterpreted as a date and I want to go on a date with you. But if we’re going to do that, we need to both be on the same page about it. If we go get something to eat, will it be a date or are you just suggesting it to be nice?”

“I would like that. I mean, yeah… it’d be a date. If you want! I don’t wanna pressure you or- are you sure that a date is-”

“I’m still fairly new to the Virginia-DC area,” Lydia interrupted, knowing that if he wasn’t able to form a complete sentence, he’d just keep starting new ones. “Is there anywhere in particular you want to go?”

“Um… well, what do you like?”

A grin graced her face, glad to hear him finally calming down. “I’m sure whatever you like I’ll enjoy as well.”

This was it. She’d scored herself a date with the bumbling boy genius.

[yeaahishowedupatyourparty]

Zara’s Truth Booth.♥️ You can read this as OOC or an IC interview, I really don’t mind!

GENERAL QUESTIONS 1. Please state your full name: “Zara Belle Calloway.”
2. Does your name(s) have any kind of meaning? If so, what is it?: “I’ve literally never asked and I doubt there’s much thought behind it. By the fourth child, you probably just pick a page in the baby name book and go with it.” 
3. Do you have any nicknames?: “No - I refuse to accept Zar or Z.” 
4. Where were you born? And in which country?: “I was born in South Kensington, London…England.”
5. What is your date of birth?: “13th of December 2001.” 
6. Of course, the following question; what is your Zodiac sign? “Sagittarius.” 
7. Do you believe in Zodiac signs? “I think so? I relate more to my moon sigh, though - a Cancer.”
8. Where do you live? “Lilac Heights…Violet Springs. In the most beautiful house. I love it.”
9. What is your home situation like? (ex. do you live with your family? Your partner etc.?) “I live in my own house, most of the time. Sometimes with Danny, sometimes without - hopefully more with in the future. I do go back to the hotel sometimes too, in London. Not as much.” 
10. Do you have any siblings? “Three older sisters…Yeah.” 
11. Do you have any kind of allergies? “Fish, which is just as well. I don’t like it.” 
12. Do you own any pets? If so, what kind of pets are they? “I have two dogs; Pumpkin and Tank.”
13. Why did you apply to St Jude’s? “To build up my career, I guess.”
14. Did you had to go through a lot audition rounds? “Not really. I already had three sisters here and also a lot of work I’d done myself by the time I got to eighteen. I did one round of auditions which I’m proud of.” 
15. What is the current course you’re following? “Acting and Directing.” 
16. If you can switch courses, which one would you switch to and why? “I wouldn’t, I’m fully dedicated to this career I have now.” 
17. What is your proudest project you’ve done? “Euphoria, easily. I wrote it, I directed every episode, I casted it, I bought it all to life and helped develop the characters. It will always be my baby and I’m so happy with how it was received.” 
18. What is the proudest project that someone’s else has done? “Singular Act I. That’s my baby…Or Little Women, that’s my other baby.”
19. Do you like FanCons? “I love FanCons.”
20. What do you like about FanCons? “Meeting the fans! It never gets old and they’re always so enthusiastic and kind. It reminds me how lucky I am, for sure. There’re some I know by name now and I’m more excited to see them than them me.” 
21. What don’t you like about FanCons? “The competition? Does that make sense. It shouldn’t matter who loves who more…I feel like on the fans part it can get quite aggressive when really they’re all there for the same reason.” 
22. A fan memory that always stuck with you? Can be positive or negative. “I feel like I’ve been put on the spot! I don’t know…” 
23. Your favorite event so far? “I loved the Summer FanCon Tour. That was so amazing.” 
24. What kind of event would you like to see in the future? “More events where we get to be silly - fundraisers and challenges. Sometimes it gets too competitive or serious with the award based ones, or talent based ones.” 
25. Would you recommend St Jude’s to friends, family. etc? “For sure.” PERSONALITY QUESTIONS 26. What are your positive traits? “I hate this question, don’t make me answer that.”
27. What are you negative traits? “I’m probably a little too hot-headed and emotional.”
28. What would other people describe you as? “…I don’t know.”
29. What are your pet peeves? “Being spoken to like an idiot, or like I don’t understand things. I’m not silly or incapable at all.” 
30. What makes you happy? “My friends.”
31. What makes you upset? “Oh, anything! But mainly seeing people down on themselves.”
32. What is something you love? “When somebody is so comfortable with you, that they open up and talk about all of their passions. I love when people are talking about what they love in general.”
33. What is something you dislike? “People who behave like they’ve never made a mistake and don’t let others move on from theirs.”
34. What are you strengths? “Again, I hate answering questions like this…Maybe that I’m good at - eventually - admitting when I’m wrong? Or, a good listener?” 
35. What are you weaknesses? “Anything with chocolate on or in it. I’m a simple person.”
36. A misconception people often think of you? “I know a lot of people think that I’m maybe like, how do I put it nicely? A home-wrecker…or, promiscuous, I guess? I’m not. I’ve had maybe 3 boyfriends in my whole life and I’m 20.” 
37. Do you have any fears? “I’m really scared of being alone - like literally and on a deeper level.”
38. What scares you the most? “Deep open water. Yikes.” 
39. What do you do to entertain yourself? “I don’t - I seek out the closest person to annoy until they entertain me.”
40. What is your MBTI? “I’m an INFJ. Most people are shocked at the I part.” 
41. How do you deal with stress? “Cry. Or eat. Or both.” 
42. Are you a determined person? Are you a stubborn person? “To an extent, I’d say so.”
43. Do you consider yourself selfish? “No…”
44. Would you like to be different? “I guess so…Sometimes I wish I was more likeable because I get the sense people aren’t that fond of me.” 
45. Are you more introverted (focused on your inner world) or more extraverted (focused on other people and the outer world)? “Introverted.” ROMANCE QUESTIONS 46. What is your sexual orientation? “I’m bisexual.”
47. Current relationship status? “Taken…Happily.”
48. When was your first kiss? “It was for a random television series and I was like 14. My first real kiss though was only a year and a bit ago.”
49. Do you remember your first date? If so, with who was it? What did you do? “I don’t remember it. Oops.” 
50. Have you ever experienced heart-break? “Yes. Not necessarily through a break-up.” 
51. Have you ever been in love? (If yes, skip to question 53) “Yes.” 
52. If no, how so? 
53. How do you know when you’re in love? “For me, everything becomes about that person. Even songs that I listened to long before I knew someone, or films I watched way before I knew they existed, I manage to tie everything back to one specific person. And, I’m definitely not a subtle person either - I think if I’m in love with someone, they’ll know before I do if they’re observant.”
54. What would be your ideal date? “I always feel like it’s more a question of who; I’d rather do something really simple like staying at home, cooking and watching a movie with someone I’m really comfortable with and like…Instead of going somewhere really extravagant with somebody I know who’ll make me uncomfortable.” 
55. What is your perspective on marriage? “It’s not the ultimate declaration of love. There are plenty of married people who aren’t in love anymore…And if you look into the roots of it, it’s kind of…messed up? I don’t know. It’s nice but not necessary.” 
56. (only for non-virgins) Are you a sub, dom or switch? “…I feel like I can switch it up. It depends on whatever the person I’m with prefers?”
57. What do you think of relationships? “I’m conflicted because there is so much more to life, but I’m not anti-relationship, obviously. I feel like they’d be better and more enjoyable if there wasn’t such a pressure on people to have been in a relationship before a certain age. If you’ve not found the one at 55, why is that so bad?” 
58. What do you think of one-night stands? “I’ve had them. They’re not for everyone, though.”
59. Are you still a virgin? “No.” 
60. Most attractive trait in a different person? “Patience. Especially if I’m talking about specifically attractive to me - I tend to jump to conclusions and get sad or mad or annoyed really quickly. So, people who bear with me, that’s attractive.”
61. What matters most to you when it comes to a relationship? “Genuine chemistry. As soon as that goes, nothing else really matters. Like, if there’s no chemistry for one person but loyalty is there - it almost feels like a job.” 
62. Are you comfortable with PDA? Or would you be comfortable with PDA? “Yeah.” 
63. Are you more of a type to be asked out or the type to ask the other out? “A bit of both. I think I’m probably bold enough to ask people out but it is nice to be asked.”
64. How do you express love to the other? “Pay attention to what they say, make sure they’re happy, tell them everything…Kiss them, cling on to them…Become painfully annoying until they can’t stand it. It’s a cycle.” 
65. Who is your celebrity crush? “Danny. My boyfriend. I don’t even care that it’s the cliche answer, haha.” GETTING DEEP QUESTIONS 66. Do you regret anything? “…Yes.”
67. Is there something you woule like to re-do? So, start all over again? “Yes.”
68. What is something you would never share with anyone? “For sure…I’m uncomfortable!” 
69. When was the last time you cried? Why did you cry? “…I’m trying to think, maybe a week ago or so? I just felt down and missed somebody.”
70. Most memorable event that happened in your time in St Judes? This could be anything: “That’s really tricky! I’m not sure, to be honest. I wasn’t here when all of the crazy stuff went down, like the cruise ship? I’m really unsure.”
71. One thing you wish you could do all over? “My childhood…but with my 20 year old mind.”
72. Someone you miss? “I’d rather not.” 
73. Something you wish you could forget? “I don’t like these questions.” 
74. Who has the biggest impact on you? “Probably my family - not necessarily in a good way.”
75. What is your perspective on love? Is it beautiful? Does it scare you? “It’s beautiful and being loved is the best feeling in the world, I’d be lying if I said I don’t crave it.” 
76. What has hurt you in the past that you don’t want others to go through? “Losing somebody that is like, your other half. Or actually, losing somebody you really love without much explanation at all. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”
77. What is something you have gained, something you have lost and something you let go of during the past year? “I’ve gained…more self-esteem, I’ve lost a lot of time I’m not going to get back - I think and I’ve let go of some trust issues, I think.”
78. Have you ever lost a friend? do you wish you would still be friends? “I have. I lost a friend because she dated my ex after claiming they were just friends - I don’t because it hurt and all she had to do was be honest.”
79. Do you have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? “I don’t think that’s appropriate.” 
80. If you could meet your 16 year old self, what would tell them? “That things do pass..They don’t necessarily get better or easier, but they pass and you learn to deal with things in a more productive way. I’d also hug her - tight.” RANDOM QUESTION ROUND 81. Summer or Winter? “Summer’s weather but winter’s overall vibe and celebrations.”
82. Cats or dogs? “Dogs, sorry.” 
83. Beach or mountains? “The beach.” 
84. Phone calls or texting? “Facetime. I’m that friend.” 
85. Have you ever skipped class? “Yes.”

[hufflautia]

hI this is a tOTALLY ANONYMOUS PERSON ASKING. and i am asking u to answer everything on here😌

lmajfniasnf yall i forced menna to send me this ask and i was kinda kidding but also a bit serious but also kinda kidding- ok anwyas here we go 

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? closed 

(2) Do You Have Freckles? no 

(3) Can You Whistle? yes

(4) Last Song You Listened To. “Needed Me” by Rihanna

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? grayish green

(6) Relationship Status. in love with loki<3! 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? cold, my fingers are cold and menna knows this 

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? no i did not, quite the opposite actually! 

(9) How Many Followers? around 650 

(10) Zodiac Sign. taurus

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? brown

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? yea

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? usually 

(14) What Books Are You Reading? no book bc i have no brain cells 

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. 

“i cannot imagine,�� replied the scarecrow; “but we can go and see.” -the wonderful wizard of oz! i forgot i had that book, i got it from library for school last year but then quarantine hit and i couldn't return it bc the library closed 

(16) Favourite Anime? i barely watch anime, so i guess “Attack on Titans”, being that its one of the few animes I've watched

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? my math teacher 

(18) Do You Collect Anything? only the souls of the innocent. also chapstick. 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? wontons that fucked my stomach up bc the meat was not cooked properly :D don't we love that?????????????!!!!!!

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? not rlly 

(21) Favourite Animal? dog 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? no 

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? usually 11 or 12- depends on day

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? no 

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? pool 

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? clandestineloki

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? i don't care as long as its safe

(28) What Makes You Happy? my siblings, my best friends, loki, tom hiddleston

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

i saw this and thought it was a good fit but then i realized it was too calm so

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? without

(31) Dogs Or Cats? DOGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? yellow 

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. i don't care

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? I've never swam in a lake before, so lake

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? yea

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? gray

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? no 

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? depends

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? yes 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? of course, loki will always be an obsession of mine bruh 

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? nO BC IM SCARED OF BUTTERFLIES 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? yes:’( 

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? of course

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? yes 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. ParaNorman

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? sunflower seeds

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? the neighbourhood

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? kinda 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? eh 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? kinda 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? yes 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? depends on mood

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? wrap 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? sleepy hallow ft foushee- deep end freestyle 

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) winter?? 

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now? l o k i (my original answer was warmth but its basically the same thing) 

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. 

(58) What Is Your Gender? female

(59) Coffee Or Tea? tea

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? nope, i finished it on Friday and Saturday like a bad bitchhhhhhhhh

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? bisexual

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? depends on day 

(63) Favourite Pokemon? squirtle i guess

(64) Favourite Social Media? insta 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? they're fine 

(66) Do You Get Homesick? kinda 

(67) Are You A Virgin? ill leave it up to ur imagination bitch (MENNA IM SO SORRY IM NOT CALLING U A BTICH IM JUST SAYING THAT IN GENERAL) 

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? i forgot the name, but its white and fancy and from the same brand 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that is a very good question, probably the motel 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? AHAH depends on what u mean by “still in my life”!!!!!!! i guess technically yes, but I've already cut off those bitches in my head 😌 manifesting it into existence <3 

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? avatar 2 

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? i don't have one 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? “not you, i didn't wanna hurt you”

(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? brown bc if i say any other color, its probably a yt person and also brown be smexy

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? yes, yes 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? honey buttered biscuits 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? among us, maybe Minecraft 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? no bc i don't know how and i would call for someone else to help 

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?probably bc I'm a hermit

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? amsifnda this is ME ur talking to 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? yes kinda, unless they're awkward (aHEM BREAKOUT ROOMS WITH NEW BUT AWKWARD PEOPLE-) 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. i used to but not anymore 

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?  i want it closed but the person i share the room with leaves it open bc they say we’re gonna fuckin suffocate if we leave it closed and i hate it bc ✨trauma✨! DONT WE LOVE TRAUMA??!?!?!?!??!?!?!? :D............

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? i baked biscuits, i did college stuff, i showered

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? usually mismatched pjs 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. chapstick, natural skincare serum, lotion, face masks

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? day 

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. don't have any

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

a snake chased me and it was weird as fuck

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? don't have one 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? people laughing, violin and piano, my friends voices, my siblings voices

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? SWEATS

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? comfy 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. showering

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? maybe an important quote? “dont trust owls” imprinted on my face

(96) Favourite YouTuber? stephanie soooooooooooooooooooooo 

[taytootwisted]

— 1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Jamel

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Outgoing

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? :)

4. Are you easy to get along with? Ehh for the most part

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? Fuck yeah

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? I like quiet men lol

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Wow I don’t think so

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? :)

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Not really

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Tee

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? Goodmorning

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

Callin my phone, trackstar, off the yak, no more parties, goat

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Yes, makes me sleepy

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Sometimes

15. What good thing happened this summer? We’re in a pandemic idrk

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Sure

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Yes!

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? No lol

19. Do you like bubble baths?ehhh haven’t had one in years

20. Do you like your neighbors? I’ve only seen him once in a year maybe twice 😂

21. What are you bad habits? Smoking & procrastinating

22. Where would you like to travel? The tropics

23. Do you have trust issues? Yeah pretty severe

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? The blunt I face after work

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Ehhh just wish I wasn’t as tiny

26. What do you do when you wake up? Wake up?¿

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Darker

28. Who are you most comfortable around?my family & friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Yep

30. Do you ever want to get married? Nope

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes need a cut

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Hmmmm lol

33. Spell your name with your chin. It just clicks buttons

34. Do you play sports? What sports? I use to! Soccer, basketball, track & volleyball

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Duh

37. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing they don’t really bother me

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Tall dark handsome rich & kind & quiet & loves me more than life

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? I haven’t went shopping in so long I’m really crusty lol

40. What do you want to do after high school?HAHAHA

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Not everyone, but yes

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? I’m in my thoughts

43. Do you smile at strangers? Sometimes

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Let’s go to space babe

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Survival

46. What are you paranoid about? Nothing currently

47. Have you ever been high? Yep

48. Have you ever been drunk? Yep

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Nope

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Timmy Turner

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? A fatter ass but we working on it

53. Favourite makeup brand? Elf

54. Favourite store?

55. Favourite blog? Tumblr duh

56. Favourite colour? Yellow

57. Favourite food? Spanish

58. Last thing you ate? Noodles

59. First thing you ate this morning? Nada but I want chic

60. Ever won a competition? For what? One time I won selling the most cookie dough for school in like 6th grade 🤣

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? About 30 times, a bit defiant

62. Been arrested? For what? Shoplifting & weed charges

63. Ever been in love? Very much so

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? I think I was like in 7th grade I met up w the boy I had a crush on to hang at the park he was on a scooter. We did a lil peck kiss lol

65. Are you hungry right now? Yes!! I want chic

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? Don’t have any tumblr friends :/

67. Facebook or Twitter? Twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr? Both

69. Are you watching tv right now? Nope

70. Names of your bestfriends? Tee, Bri, Ale, Mel, Kev,

71. Craving something? What?omg ur gonna keep asking huh CHIC

72. What colour are your towels? Pink, cream, flower print, brown

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? Three

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Yes

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? 1 right now

75. Favourite animal? Cheetah

76. What colour is your underwear? Black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Chocolate chip cookie dough

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Blue

80. What colour pants? No pants

81. Favourite tv show? Wentworth currently

82. Favourite movie? Too hard

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Original duh

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? 21 jump street lol

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Dory

87. First person you talked to today? Nobody yet

88. Last person you talked to today? Today just started

89. Name a person you hate? Nobody

90. Name a person you love? My mom

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Nope I’m good

92. In a fight with someone? Nope :)

93. How many sweatpants do you have? Probably like 10

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? Probably like 10 lol

95. Last movie you watched? Something in Netflix I forget

96. Favourite actress? Nope

97. Favourite actor? Nope

98. Do you tan a lot? No I’m pasty as shit

99. Have any pets? Nope lonely lol

100. How are you feeling? I’m feeling good I think today is gonna be a good day

101. Do you type fast? Yea

102. Do you regret anything from your past? There’s one thing I wish I could go back & change

103. Can you spell well? I believe so

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Yes

107. Have you ever been on a horse? No :/

108. What should you be doing? Nothing it’s 630 am

109. Is something irritating you right now? Nope

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yes :/

111. Do you have trust issues? HUGE

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Uh...... the girls at the viewing

113. What was your childhood nickname? Birdy

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yes

115. Do you play the Wii? I have

116. Are you listening to music right now? Nope

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Yes

118. Do you like Chinese food? Yes!

119. Favourite book? Not sure

120. Are you afraid of the dark? No

121. Are you mean? Sometimes

122. Is cheating ever okay? No but it happens

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? Yes

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? No

125. Do you believe in true love? Yes

126. Are you currently bored? No this is entertainment

127. What makes you happy? Food, love, money

128. Would you change your name? No

129. What your zodiac sign? Cancer

130. Do you like subway? Eh

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Omg this already happened I fucking snapped :/ we’re ok now tho

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Tee

133. Favourite lyrics right now? She’s a runner she’s a trackstar

134. Can you count to one million? I guess so

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? I don’t really lie too much

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed

137. How tall are you? 5”3’

138. Curly or Straight hair? Both

139. Brunette or Blonde? Blonde

140. Summer or Winter? Summer

141. Night or Day? Both

142. Favourite month? June

143. Are you a vegetarian? No

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Once in awhile all three

145. Tea or Coffee? Yea

146. Was today a good day? Just started

147. Mars or Snickers? Neither

148. What’s your favourite quote? Get me lit ima slut fr

149. Do you believe in ghosts? Sure

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “I’m happy to do it either way.”

[ageofevermore]

1-96

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

it’s a dual sliding door, so usually one sides open. but preferably, both doors are closed. 

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

sometimes in the summer, not often though. 

(3) Can You Whistle?

yes! 

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

well for some reason there’s a guy on my TV singing God Bless The USA

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

purple

(6) Relationship Status.

single because my favorite omegle guy won’t answer me 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

48F / 9C

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

i woke up wishing i was still asleep

(9) How Many Followers?

835

(10) Zodiac Sign.

Sun: Capricorn, Rising: Aries, Moon: Aquarius 

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

brown / hazel 

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

no

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

obviously, i’m not completely insane

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

whatever fucking book my english class assigned...

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

i literally only have a text book by me and opening it is triggering

(16) Favourite Anime?

i don’t watch anime

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

my mom...about greys anatomy...but still my mom about christmas and my birthday. i cry alot, but i like REALLY cried about those two topics

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

chapstick, trauma, candles 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

it’s only 10am and i haven’t even thought about breakfast 

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

yes, and then my mom yells at me because i do nothing “subtly” and the entire car shakes

(21) Favourite Animal?

white siberian tigers, snow leopards, dolphins, and now elephants

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

unfortunately. i love gymnastics, but like, i’m not trying to watch men in toboggans and swim caps 

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

anywhere between 12pm and 3am

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

no, i never wear makeup because it makes me look more ugly

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

ocean

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

besides my friends i don’t really have a favorite blog, i stick to my circle and don’t venture very far 

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

bottled. 

(28) What Makes You Happy?

i couldn’t tell you...

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

without, but i always start with it on. it never lasts more then two songs.

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

dogs

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

a shade of purple from the crayola 200 pack

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

wii

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

ocean

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

hell mothering fucking year i do baby, lets take that train to hogwarts 

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

its a friends pj crop, so black and white stripped with the central perks logo

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

yup

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

save money 

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

my cup 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

stranger things ig

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

no, those assholes scare me, but i’ve grown + released them 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

um chile, i would follow my best friend off a cliff with no hesitation

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

all the fucking time 

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

ITS MY FAVORITE FORM OF TRAVEL 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

the hannah montana movie

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

peanuts 

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

one direction 

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

yes 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

yes, but it takes me forever to fall asleep 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

yea, depends on the day and the level of scardy bitch i feel like being 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

i love both 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

hell yeah, let me feel the beat in my kidneys 

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

carve pumpkins 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

no tears left to cry by ag

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

fall

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now?

a churro + peppermint mocha frap

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

(58) What Is Your Gender?

female (she/her)

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

iced coffee / sweet tea

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

yeah, i have environmental homework and US I homework and Algebra II homework

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

bruh, idk 

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

no, that shit’s never made 

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

jigglypuff 

(64) Favourite Social Media?

pintrest 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

they’re okay

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

no. i don’t miss thins very easily, i’m away from home for a week and i have no doubt that i could spend the rest of my life without going back. 

(67) Are You A Virgin?

yes sir

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

idk, some really thick and heavy in hydration set 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

sleep in my car, though both options scare me 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

i have a strained relationship with my bio dad, but unfortunately i still have to associate myself with him a few times a year 

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

black widow or spiderman 3, but i’m willing to see anything just take me back! 

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

i’ve never had an ex, but i do wish krystian would stop ignoring me. stupid scotland boys 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

“friends dont lie”

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

green / brown 

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

i loved swinging, but a few years ago it started making me dizzy so i don’t swing very often anymore. but tire swings especially are my shit 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

chicken flavored ramen 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

yes 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

yeah...because they’re dying and if i have the skills to save them...why wouldn’t i?

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

honey, i do full virtual high school. we stan a pandemic (we don’t)

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

social media stalker is my middle name. not anymore though, i haven’t been asked to find a boy in a while 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

no. i hate it. anxiety city man. 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

i don’t wear rings, but i really want to.

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

closed

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

woke up, watched stranger things, made ramen 

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

whatever i fall asleep in. 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

are beauty and skincare the same? because i don’t own much makeup. 

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

i used to be a night person. but this pandemic has hit hard with depression and i’ve become a stay in bed all day person

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

2048 balls, among us, ball sort puzzle, bubble shooter, bubble sort, color roll 3D, drag n merge, fit and squeeze, hole.io, mario kart, match 3D, nonogram.com, paint the cube, roof rails, solitare, spit, stacky dash, stair run, timber run...

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

After my moms fiance died, I had a dream that he was able to come see my fifth grade play (he died just before it happened) and when we were walking out he got into the white car from fast and furious (we watched the movies together) and said he would see me again soon, then he drove off...like talk about weird 

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

rootbeer 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

i like a good clicking sound 

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

sweats everyday all day 

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

like a fucking wreck 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

netflix 

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

i want a bunch of little symbols, and i think it would be cute if i got a T for my mom, but i can’t tell her that because she might think i’m going soft and exploit my show of affection (jfc why am i like this lmao)

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

colleen ballinger 

[metalbatandzenko]

All of them. All the questions.

oof

1. Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

I have sliding doors on my closet so it’s one open one closed.

2. Do You Have Freckles?

Nope!

3. Can You Whistle?

Nope (:

4. Last Song You Listened To.

I...don’t remember lmao, I think it was 6 Inch by Beyonce

5. What Is Your Favorite Color?

I don’t know if I have one tbh.

6. Relationship Status.

Currently juggling seven reply guys bc rona has everyone acting out of line, but single.

7. What Is The Temperature Right Now?

46º

8. Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Yes sdkjfhdlkf

9. How Many Followers?

215.

10. Zodiac Sign.

Aries/Aries/Cancer.

11. What Is Your Eye Color?

Brown.

12. Take A Vitamin Daily?

No.

13. Do You Sing In The Shower?

Yes, usually it’s Mitski or songs from musicals because you know. Former theater kid.

14. What Books Are You Reading?

The Chronology of Water by Lidia Yuknavitch.

15. Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

“As in earlier days” from the poem The Walk by Thomas Hardy

16. Favorite Anime?

OPM is the only anime I watch. Being Japanese American and fem aligned means having. Not great associations with anime tbh.

17. Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

I honestly can’t remember the last time I cried in front of someone

WAIT YES I DO

It was November 23rd and my little cousin and I watched Over the Garden Wall. Both of us cried at the end.

18. Do You Collect Anything?

I have a knife collection and an old rock collection from when I was younger. I also unintentionally have a major makeup collection. My lipstick collection is borderline embarrassing. In my defense it started in 7th grade.

19. What Did You Have For Lunch?

I uh. I didn’t have lunch skfjhdsljfh

20. Do You Dance In The Car?

I do!

21. Favorite Animal?

Dude I fucking love crows.

22. Do You Watch The Olympics?

Some of them! My mom was really athletic growing up (as in one of those kids that plays a sport every season in high school), so she watches a lot of them. We tend to watch figure skating (which I know little about but have strong opinions on), gymnastics, synchronized swimming, track, and judo.

23. What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

Usually I’m in bed by 11 but I don’t go to sleep until 2am. Recently I’ve been getting to sleep at 7am.

24. Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

It is currently three in the morning so no akslkjsahd

25. Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Ocean. I grew up in Northern California near the coast, and now I’m in a landlocked state. And you can kind of feel it, you know? The air doesn’t smell like salt and redwoods, the mountains aren’t there to hold up the sky so you just feel it pressing down on your chest. I miss the ocean.

26. Favorite Tumblr Blog?

I don’t know if I have a favorite. erikkillmongerdontpullout is funny and insightful, and I love dostoevskydocs’ poetry compilations.

27. Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

I grew up somewhere with access to really good tap water, so I’ll go with that.

28. What Makes You Happy?

Writing, spending time with friends, the feeling of dappled sunlight through the tree canopy.

29. Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

30. Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

With :)

31. Dogs Or Cats?

Dogs but I love cats too!

32. If You Were A Crayon What Color Would You Be?

Moss green!

33. PlayStation Or Xbox.

Xbox.

34. Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

Ocean. I don’t trust lakes.

35. Do You Believe In Magic?

I believe in the supernatural, I don’t know if magic’s the right word. It’s more like a belief that there’s something more to the world than what we’re able to perceive. 

36. What Color Shirt Are You Wearing?

Charcoal grey.

37. Can You Curl Your Tongue?

Yes! I can also make my tongue into a clover.

38. Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

A bit of both. I can be pretty frugal when I’m by myself but I inherited the need to pay for everything for my friends from my mom, so if my friends are around, I will try to muscle my way into paying for everything. This is usually unsuccessful bc my friends are in the same boat.

39. Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Yes. I’ve got a pink water bottle on my bedstand.

40. Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

I mean. OPM lkjshdflkjdh I’ve been hyperfixating on it, but I also am pretty obsessed with OTGW (I have been for years).

41. Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

No but I’ve had a few land on me.

42. Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

Depends on the person. Overall, I’d say no, but my friends have significant sway over me.

43. Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Yes.

44. Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

I actually do. But only for short flights. Anything longer than 4 hours makes my body really hurt.

45. Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

Moana.

46. Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Sunflower seeds!

47. If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Orville Peck or Carseat Headrest.

48. Are You A Picky Eater?

Nope!

49. Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

Yeah.

50. Do You Fear Thunder/Lightning?

No, I actually love them. I sleep best when it’s thundering.

51. Do You Like To Read/Write?

Yes to both. I’m a Creative Writing major so dkljfhljkdf

52. Do You Like Your Music Loud?

Yeah! Though not as loud as some people, my ears are sensitive.

53. Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Wrap presents. I’m not a big fan of the smell of pumpkin, and wrapping presents is a tradition for my mom, brother and I. We’d put on some music, drink some hot chocolate, and wrap as many as possible. Then my brother and I would smuggle some wrapping paper to our rooms and wrap our mom’s gift.

54. Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Somebody that I Used to Know-Gotye (listen the song still slaps)

55. What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Winter/Spring transition. It hailed for 15 minutes straight yesterday.

56. What Are You Craving Right Now?

A popeyes 5 piece spicy chicken meal with fries and ranch. Can you tell I’ve thought about this?

57. Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

I don’t wanna.

58. What Is Your Gender?

Nonbinary, but vaguely girl adjacent. 

59. Coffee Or Tea?

I think coffee. I drink more tea, but I also drink exclusively green tea and chai (like the traditional chai made with milk not the chai teabags) and I really am not a black/white/earl grey tea person.

60. Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

OOF Yeah I do

I’ve got a thousand word readers response to “The Other Boat” by E. M. Foster, a one thousand word journal about WWI, a reflective journal check in and a powerpoint I have to make for Sense and Sensibility for Brit Lit and I also am tutoring a few of my classmates

In my biological anthropology class I’ve got a Unit Exam and a few lectures to watch

For my internship/Teachers Assistant position I’ve got 17 10 page rough drafts to read and give in depth comments on as well as a portfolio I have to assemble for next year’s TA bc I’m transferring, phone meetings with the 17 students who wrote those rough drafts, and I’ve gotta compile some resources for my professor

I need to finish my memoir for my independent study and I have to present. my nonfiction memoir. to my classmates. on Zoom. I’m one of two people doing a nonfiction memoir for their independent study the rest are doing fiction, poetry or a literary analysis paper so like. My classmates are gonna be talking about their fiction piece and then I’m gonna be giving a 15 minute reading and Q&A about a piece that focuses on my trauma and being hate crimed so that’s fun.

I also gotta get some stuff done for my school’s lit magazine.

61. What Is Your Sexuality?

A known bisexual™

62. Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

I try to but I forget.

63. Favorite Pokémon?

Togepi, Blissey and Togekiss.

64. Favorite Social Media?

I hate to say it but it’s tumblr.

65. What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

If it’s longer than six stories, I’m not watching it. Unless I know they’re gonna be fun or we’re really close then I will.

66. Do You Get Homesick?

A bit. I’m still really homesick for my hometown tbh because that’s where all my family except for my parents are. I’m really close with my extended family, so being isolated from them feels like there’s an emptiness at my side.

67. Are You A Virgin?

No.

68. What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Redken Frizz Dismiss. I got those big fucking bottles you can get at Ulta where it’s like a gallon of shampoo so I haven’t had to buy any in over a year.

69. If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

I’ve slept in my car before and I will do so again most likely. Also $60 is too much to spend for a motel room.

70. Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

Yes. Though I’m much closer to my mom than my dad.

71. Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

Idk shit about movies tbh.

72. Do You Miss Your Ex?

One of them yes, the others no. But the one I miss I also acknowledge is someone who had their place in my life at the time and helped me through some rough shit, but no longer has a place in my life. I appreciate the hell out of him though, and we’re on good terms.

73. What Is Your Favorite Quote Right Now?

I’ve got two!

“I don’t know how to stay tender with this much blood in my mouth” –Ophelia, Hamlet

and

"Suffering feels religious if you do it right." –Chelsea Hodson

74.  What Eye Color Do You Find Sexiest?

Brown. Especially the almost black-brown eyes.

75. Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

Yes to both.

76. What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Chocolate covered pretzels ljhflfsd

77. What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

Toon Blast and 2048.

78. Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

Holy shit I hate this question. Yes, of course I would. I don’t know why mentioning that the person is homeless is relevant. Homeless people are not somehow less worthy of CPR?? What the fuck.

79. Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

...yes

80. Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

I’ve briefly skimmed over someone’s page after meeting them but I don’t lurk.

81. Do You Like Meeting New People?

Depends on my mood.

82. Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

I hate my hands so this was pushing it.

83. Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed.

84. What Are Three Things You Did Today?

Corrected papers, walked my dog, did some writing.

85. What Do You Wear To Bed?

T-shirt and shorts.

86. List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

Dude I can’t do that I have too many, I’ve been buying makeup for 7 years and I used to work next to a sephora

My makeup routine pre-rona was:

Sephora brand moisturizer

Milk Hydrogrip primer

Fenty Pro Filtr Hydrating Foundation

Maybelline Age Rewind Concealer

Anastasia Brow Definer

Glossier Cloud Paint

Fenty Sunstalkr Bronzer

Fenty Liquid Flyliner

Fenty Flypencil

Fenty Full Frontal Mascara

Fenty Glossbomb

It’s...an expensive routine.

87. Are You A Day Or Night Person?

Night to early morning.

88. List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

I answered this one and I don’t want to reanswer it tbh ldkjfhds

89. Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

I genuinely can’t remember any of my dreams right now. I remember a snippet of one where I was in a cave and I looked at the wall and I could see water running down it, reflecting in the torchlight but that’s literally it.

90. Favorite Soda Drink?

I’m a big pomegranate person, so Italian soda’s my go to.

91. What Sounds Are Your Favorite?

The sizzle of meat hitting a hot wok, rain, hail, thunder, the crunch of dry leaves. I also love the sound of Simone de Rochefort’s laugh. It’s so good.

92. Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

Jeans.

93. How Do You Look Right Now?

Shitty.

94. Name Something That Relaxes You.

Skyrim ldskjfhd

95. What Tattoo Do You Want?

I really want to get my family’s mon on my ribcage and my mom’s Japanese name somewhere. I don’t know how my pain tolerance is but if I can handle it, I’d want to get at least a partial sleeve.

96. Favorite YouTuber?

Polygon and Watcher.

[innerclouds]

Another big ask request:

   “Wait, these are actually hella cute questions.”

—

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Don't recall.

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Latter.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Bae.

4. Are you easy to get along with? Probably not.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? If I'm drunk chances are they're drunk too so attempts at care would be made.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Big brains.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Mebe.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Idk.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? No.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Bae.

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? Something about freezing to death.

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? Don't have any currently.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? No touchy.

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Luck sorta, miracles no.

15. What good thing happened this summer? Computer didn't melt.

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Do e-kisses count?

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? You'd have to be stupid to think there wasn't any. Now if said life is as intelligent(lol) as humans or higher, that's another story.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Not really.

19. Do you like bubble baths? Not really.

20. Do you like your neighbors? Yes and no.

21. What are you bad habits? Nail nibbling.

22. Where would you like to travel? Lotta places.

23. Do you have trust issues? Yes, but it's more on the surface due to anxiety, if I get to know someone it evaporates.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Chat with bae.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? There's two of them and they sit high.

26. What do you do when you wake up? Yell at the cat to stfu/pitch alarm.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Albino levels of lighter.

28. Who are you most comfortable around? Bae, cat, 2/3 siblings.

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? I have not had contact with them so I don't know and I honestly don't care.

30. Do you ever want to get married? Yus.

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Ew.

33. Spell your name with your chin. No, you know how much bacteria is on a keyboard? I keep mine clean but even so, that's nasty.

34. Do you play sports? What sports? No.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV. I mean I already technically do, I don't bother watching anymore unless movies count but I use my comp for that.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? Absolutely nothing.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Bae.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Sprouts? Costco? I dunno, I wouldn't call those favorites, they're just stores.

40. What do you want to do after high school? I wanted to be into dinos, but too much leg work in terrible environments plus layoffs layoffs layoffs.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Ye.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? Any number of things.

43. Do you smile at strangers? Lolno.

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Spaaaaaaaaaaaace.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Chats with bae, cat yowling, alarm, not wanting to be homeless so go to work

46. What are you paranoid about? That is an extremely long list.

47. Have you ever been high? Yes.

48. Have you ever been drunk? Unfortunately.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Maybe.

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Black.

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Yep.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? Rather not say.

53. Favourite makeup brand? What makeup?

54. Favourite store? I answered this above.

55. Favourite blog? Bae's.

56. Favourite colour? Answered this.

57. Favourite food? Answered this.

58. Last thing you ate? Ice cube.

59. First thing you ate this morning? Orange juice.

60. Ever won a competition? For what? Ah... halloween costume thing in a game once, years ago.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? No.

62. Been arrested? For what? No.

63. Ever been in love? Yes.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? I don't think it counts.

65. Are you hungry right now? Sure.

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? Who says those aren't one in the same?

67. Facebook or Twitter? Both are equally interesting and retarded at the same time.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? See above.

69. Are you watching tv right now? No.

70. Names of your bestfriends? Sebbysheepy

71. Craving something? What? Bison burgers, thanks to above.

72. What colour are your towels? Black, gray and misc print.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? Four if you count the body pillow.

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No.

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? 11.

75. Favourite animal? Sharks, birds

76. What colour is your underwear? Currently? Dark blue.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Yes.

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Answered this.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Black.

80. What colour pants? Gray.

81. Favourite tv show? Answered this.

82. Favourite movie? Answered this.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Never seen either.

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? See above.

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Stop asking about whatever mean girls is I've never seen it.

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Bruce and the sharks.

87. First person you talked to today? Cat.

88. Last person you talked to today? Bae.

89. Name a person you hate? I don't hate exactly, I just dislike with various tiers.

90. Name a person you love? People with brains.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? No because that means I'd have to touch them.

92. In a fight with someone? Cat maybe.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? Three or four.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? Two.

95. Last movie you watched? Don't recall.

96. Favourite actress? None.

97. Favourite actor? Sam Neill.

98. Do you tan a lot? I burn.

99. Have any pets? Gatto.

100. How are you feeling? Meh.

101. Do you type fast? Yes and no.

102. Do you regret anything from your past? Tons.

103. Can you spell well? Well.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? No.

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Possibly.

107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes.

108. What should you be doing? Drawing.

109. Is something irritating you right now? This ask request has over 100 questions, that's abnormal.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yes.

111. Do you have trust issues? Wtf, I've answered this in this same ask thing.

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Idk.

113. What was your childhood nickname? I'd rather not say, it was mean.

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yes.

115. Do you play the Wii? No.

116. Are you listening to music right now? No.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Yes.

118. Do you like Chinese food? Love it.

119. Favourite book? Anwered this.

120. Are you afraid of the dark? No.

121. Are you mean? I try not to be but I can be.

122. Is cheating ever okay? No.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? I don't have white shoes.

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes.

125. Do you believe in true love? Yes.

126. Are you currently bored? Not really.

127. What makes you happy? Bae.

128. Would you change your name? Absolutely.

129. What your zodiac sign? Rat.

130. Do you like subway? No.

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Uh, lol.

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? I've answered this in the same ask thing. You need to screen these so there's no repeats. Shit gets old.

133. Favourite lyrics right now? None.

134. Can you count to one million? Why?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? Been a few of those.

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed hopefully!

137. How tall are you? Smol.

138. Curly or Straight hair? Me? Wavey.

139. Brunette or Blonde? Me? Brunette.

140. Summer or Winter? Autumn.

141. Night or Day? Night.

142. Favourite month? Autumn or mid spring.

143. Are you a vegetarian? No. Meat is too tasty.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Dark cocolate.

145. Tea or Coffee? Yes.

146. Was today a good day? Meh.

147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers.

148. What’s your favourite quote? "Never try, never fail."

149. Do you believe in ghosts? Sorta.

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? "That creep."

[wisepuma23]

The Butterfly’s Shelter: Chapter 1

Summary - Logan dreamed about becoming a father all his life. However, he finds being a father on paper is very different than actually being a father to a real living breathing child. Virgil was three months old when he was adopted by Logan Crofters but his eyes spark with a curiosity, unlike other babies at his age. It both fills Logan with pride and complete utter dread. Meanwhile, he doesn't understand how his best friend, Patton Milena, was able to pull off being a single Dad to his five-year-old son, Roman. When he asks, Patton laughs until he nearly pukes, and just pats him on the shoulder.

Everything changes after Virgil's first birthday.

Logan will finally understand what it truly means to be a father beyond yanking him from open sockets and burping him as according to page 63 of his parenting manual.

Word count - 2, 901

Pairings - Logicality, Platonic Analogical, Platonic Royality, Platonic Prinxiety

Warnings - None

Notes - Behold! It's here!! Our collab between me and Tashi (fangirltothefullest)! It all started because of one scene from my fic (We Were Never Welcome Here) and we have been excitedly brainstorming and planning this Dad!Logan AU!!!

I also want to say thank you to our beta my-happy-little-bean!!! She's amazing and she really helped us polish our chapter for tonight.

It will be updated every two weeks so keep your eyes out for that!

I hope y’all enjoy!

Next Chapter

Read on AO3

Footsteps tapped along tiled floors as Logan sat in the waiting room. That universal rhythmic drum of nerves and stress made Logan aware of his own finger tapping against the chair he sat on. He couldn’t help it. Parents, nurses, and children roamed the bright hallways of the pediatric wing. His leg bounced in place as children laughed and he heard their little giggles fill his ears, his mind, his very heart.

Soon, soon, his thoughts cried out in agony. He noticed a mother across from him tilt her head in concern, then blossomed into pity. Logan felt hot embarrassment fill his chest and forced his leg and finger to sit still, yet the bundle of nerves that sat in his chest like an iron ball did not leave.

He knew it was expected for fathers to experience stress on their very first day as a father. Normal, even. Logan looked down, but he wasn’t like most fathers. Most fathers didn’t need to go through a million hoops, calls, and interviews by social workers and state officials alike. Even if it had been a hassle for the past two years, he much preferred the screening process to be complicated and thorough; it made for a better result in the end. Logan did not balk at the mountain of paperwork that stood in his way.

It was worth it.

He was prepared as far as the home, career, and state requirements seemed to suggest and the paperwork was filled out neatly and orderly. Logan had crossed all his t’s and dotted his i’s. It had taken twice as long to make sure everything was in order because they had lost his application twice when he’d faxed it. It was as if the world was trying to deny him. But Logan was not one to give up. Not after so long of dreaming about this.

Yet now that he, Logan Crofters, was faced with the actual premise of facing the children and selecting one to adopt? His heart pounded in his ears and threatened to burst out of his chest and onto the sanitized floors. His palms were sweaty no matter how many times he wiped down his slacks. He was handling it. Kinda.

Beyond the door to his left laid a plentitude of babies in their cribs. He swallowed hard. How was he supposed to choose? What if he couldn’t choose?

His hand pressed up against his tie, habitually adjusting it against the black of his button down, and pushed up his glasses. The habit took the edge off his nerves; at least it didn’t feel like his heart was going to bounce straight out of his chest cavity anymore. Yet his mind clamored with questions still, as it often did.

What if he wasn’t ready? What if this silly little childhood dream to be a father wasn’t meant to be?

Logan shut his eyes against the roar of what if, what if ?

“Mister Crofters?” a voice called out gently, snapping Logan out of his thoughts at the familiarity of it; it was none other than the social worker assigned to his adoption case. The man’s pleasant smile pulled him from his thoughts. Logan admired the dark green tie adorned around the social worker’s neck. Different from last time’s baby blue. Logan shook his head and immediately stood to shake the kind man’s hand.

“Dr. Picani,” Logan greeted with a rare smile, and the other’s blue eyes crinkled behind his own pair of spectacles. Of all the social workers that could be handling the infant department of the adoption agency, Dr. Emile Picani was one of the best. Excitable but gentle, pleasant to talk to and understanding; from the moment Logan met him, he knew this man’s life goal was getting these children to good homes. His kindness above all was what sold Logan that his case was in good hands.

“It’s good to see you, Logan. Are you ready to meet the little ones?” Dr. Picani gestured to the open doorway and Logan nodded.

“I’ve been ready for the past two years, sir; it’d be illogical that I wouldn’t be ready,” Logan said with an edge of confidence and followed him in through the second set of doors. It wasn’t true, and he was terrified beyond belief. He wanted to run to the nearest window and scream. Logan hoped the nurses didn’t tell Dr. Picani about the panic attack he had in the bathroom half an hour ago either. But by Isaac Newton, he wanted this more than anything.

As soon as he entered the room, his ears were immediately assaulted with the sounds of babbling and giggling. Tinkling laughter rang through the air like bells. Logan could see a row of cribs lining the back wall of what looked like a large playroom with baby toys scattered about the floor. There were a few babies who were sleeping, and in another room, Logan could see a couple of heavy-duty cribs fashioned with medical supplies.

None of the babies appeared to be in any of those, though he could only see a couple machines through a cracked glimpse of the sterile room. Nurses and caretakers held some of the babies, feeding them while others played with them on the floor. Warmth filled him up from the bottom of his toes to the top of his head as he leaned over a crib.

The pink baby within burst out into giggles at his appearance. Logan blinked back tears before the other doctors and nurses could see and moved away before he disturbed it further. They looked so… fragile and lovely in a way that he could not put into words. Logan desperately wanted to sit down and never leave the ward again. If he could have dubbed this his new favorite place, he would have.

Logan could see quite a few young volunteers helping out and Dr. Picani smiled at Logan’s awe. Laughter lines deepened around his light blue eyes with amusement and Logan found himself smiling despite his own efforts to appear professional.

“These are most of our available babies ready for adoption.” Dr. Picani told him. “They’ve all been properly vaccinated and such. We are currently housing only one child, an infant, who is in need of medical care and he’s under observation.” Logan frowned in concern, but Dr. Picani handwaved with a beam. “But he’s as strong as Lapis Lazuli, I just know it. He’ll be fine. When you’re done here I can take you there to see him if you like!”

Logan sighed in relief and nodded as he peered about the room. There were so many, how was he supposed to choose? He shuffled in place, torn in too many directions, and Dr. Picani chuckled behind him.

“They don’t bite Logan; that comes when they start getting teeth,” he teased and lifted one little baby from a crib.

“This is little Anna,” he cooed and held her out to Logan who lifted her into his arms and his chest ached. Her rosy cheeks, pudgy little fingers, and eyes that twinkled like sapphires made his heart melt into a puddle. Her eyes lit up and squealed as she kicked her feet. He chuckled and bounced her without thinking.

Dr. Picani smiled. “Aw, see? Paternal instincts kicking in already.”

“Perhaps,” Logan mused and his fear and apprehension of the situation seemed to drain away, “and what happened to you, chubby little thing?” He asked her as if she could answer. “Where are your parents?”

“Teenage pregnancy. Oof.” Dr. Picani shook his head as he checked her file. “The mother has requested being able to visit. However....” He frowned as Logan’s heart leapt up his throat. “... she specifically requested that she wants her child raised by a couple. You’re not-”

“No,” Logan replied with a sigh and gently ran his hand over her rosy cheeks one last time as he set her back down in her crib with the utmost care, ignoring the way his soul screamed . “Single.”

“Mmm indeed. Forgive me, I almost forgot, which was silly of me.” He sighed. “Well, there are plenty of other children whose parents have-”

But he was cut off by an ear-splitting scream shook the room, causing the other babies to startle and cry.

“Oh no, oh dear-!” Dr. Picani and another caretaker moved quickly toward the room of medical cribs. “Forgive us, this little gem is in a lot of pain.”

Logan followed worriedly; the screaming and shrieking tugged at his heart. He entered the other room where they shut the door behind him and he watched Dr. Picani gently reach his hands into the crib and bring the tiniest infant he’d ever seen from the crib. He was not hooked up to any monitors but the room was definitely warmer than the other and smelled even more sterile.

“Is the baby alright?” Logan asked, tone laced heavily with concern, and Dr. Picani nodded as the baby screamed and screamed to no avail.

“Colic,” he said softly as he rubbed the baby’s back in soothing motions. “Poor thing has a lot of tummy pain. But he screams so loudly we can’t keep him near the other little ones or they don’t sleep.” He winced as another wail pierced the room. “I am so sorry, it’s like a Howler Owl is in here. I offer my sincerest condolences for your ears.”

But Logan wasn’t looking at Dr. Picani; his eyes were locked onto the crying little baby, who was sobbing hard enough to almost puke in the other’s gentle grip. His heart ached, yearning to protect him and he held his hands out.

“May I?” he asked.

“Oh! Of course!” Dr. Picani said with a veiled note of surprise as he set him in Logan’s waiting arm, “Don’t shake him, it’s quite tempting for frustrated parents; I highly advise against it no matter how loud he cries.”

“I would never,” Logan whispered as he held the squirming infant closer, supporting his head in the cradle of his arm. “I would rather die than harm this little teardrop of starlight.”

The baby had a tuft of black hair stark against pale sickly skin that sheened with sweat as he squirmed in his gentle yet firm hold. He was so small, a lima bean almost, while the other babies around the ward were hulking giants by comparison. His hands and legs kicked as he let out another hearty wail.

Logan shushed him gently as he bent down and let his forehead bump against the fragile infant with the barest of touches. His skin so soft and supple even if it was slick with tears and sweat at the moment. Those tears bigger than any he had ever seen on a child; filled with so much discomfort and sadness, they fell in big rivers from where they pooled inside his eyes. His pale little face was so blotchy.

Logan felt his heartstrings pulled taut like a bowstring and the pang in his chest returned at the sight of his unyielding struggles.

“I know you’re in pain, little one. You have known nothing else, have you?” Logan whispered, reverent in his tone and his only answer was shuddering, unending sobs. “You are incredibly tiny, aren’t you? Hmm, how old are you?”

He heard the rustle of papers again, and then Dr. Picani’s buttery smooth reply of “About three months now.”

“He’s so young....” Logan said gently and soothingly shushed the baby. He squirmed and cried and it was loud in his ears, but he couldn’t help it and Logan understood that. “Where are his parents?”

For the first time, Dr. Picani lost that perpetual smile.

“He’s an orphan. His parents died when his house caught on fire. Firefighters said it was a faulty oven.” The doctor leaned over to brush a hand over Virgil’s head. “Boy’s a miracle, I tell you. He spent weeks in the infant ICU to recover the damage in his lungs.” Dr. Picani smiled as he brushed away a tear, clearly distressed but proud of the little bean. “He is a fighter.”

“But what about the rest of his relatives?”

Dr. Picani pulled away as a dark look crossed his face.

“None that would take him. They refused to accept a ‘devil baby’.” He glared down at the file he held. “Their words not mine. His relatives think he’s bad luck and don’t consider him part of the family tree. Disowned and discarded as if something this small and helpless could bring misfortune on them like some Scooby Doo villain.”

“Utter nonsense.” Logan resisted the urge to hold the baby tighter in his arms, as if he could shield from the dangerous ignorance of the world. Logan shifted from foot to foot as the baby calmed into mere sniffles; a respite from his pained sobbing. Logan stared at the baby he held, swaddled in soft blue blankets, and remembered the long days of waiting.

Dreams haunted him as a child, of a carriage and pealing laughter as children ran around clutching at his legs. Soft blurry dreams of him rushing to put a band-aid on a skinned knee, small hands that grasped around his neck, and of everlasting sunny days as he played with them in their white picket fence yard. Fatherhood felt more like a wonderful dream than a societal milestone. It was his one life goal, more than his career, and more than his love life. He’d been dreaming of the idea long before he even knew what it entailed.

Round dark eyes met his own and he felt the breath knocked out of him. The awareness that stared back at him fascinated him. This was a human in the making. It will go through various developmental stages until one day it will dream a little dream of its own. Rock star, astrobiologist, writer, or even stunt devil.

He rocked the baby gently, never breaking his stare; his sniffles disappeared as he watched Logan in rapt awe. Curiosity, even. The infant squirmed in his swaddle and thrusted a pudgy hand up at him. His little fingers clenched around his own finger and he watched the baby’s eyes light up despite the pain.

“Oh,” Dr. Picani said, his voice the gentlest he’s ever heard in two years of knowing him. “Are you quite alright?”

“Yes, why do you ask?” Logan croaked as the baby tilted his little head in surprise.

“Sir, you’re crying.”

Logan blinked, but it was true. Tears leaked out of his eyes in steady trickles and he could feel the cold of their rivers running down the sides of his face. He hadn’t even realized. He wondered how strange he must look with tears dripping down his cheeks and he could do nothing more than blink at the doctor in dumbfounded stupidity. He heard a quiet little squeak from the baby he held as he squirmed. His tears were cold but his arms were too full to brush them away.

“This one.” Logan said firmly, facing Dr. Picani head on. “Please.”

Dr. Picani’s eyes went wide at the uncharacteristic voice crack. “A-are you sure? We have other children in the playroom that will be more suited to your needs. He will be very fussy and it will take quite a while for him to recover yet so he may scream all that time. I rather recommend him to a family with experience already and-”

“This one.” Logan said, his voice laced with hard steel.

This was the child he wanted to raise; the one he wanted to dedicate his life to. In an instant he could imagine this little one’s future and its trillions of different changing variables, he knew with absolute certainty he wanted to give this baby a home and love him to the best of his ability.

“What’s his name?” He asked with a smile.

Dr. Picani scratched something on his clipboard and looked up, his eyes searching into Logan one last time before his shoulders dropped.

“Virgil. His name is Virgil.”

Logan pulled his finger away from Virgil’s grip to trace his round cheeks. Still that distressing shade of paleness. Virgil let out a little gurgle and leaned into his warm hand. If he wasn’t crying before, he certainly was now. Tears blurred his vision so much he could barely see. He didn’t believe in a Heaven, but the sheer amounts of dopamine flooding into his system made him more susceptible to believe he was there. Virgil’s brown eyes twinkled with faint starlight.

He was never more sure of anything in his entire life. Previous worries and concerns be damned. He wanted to raise Virgil as his son (or any other gender he was comfortable with later in life) as his own. Logan never understood feelings, or why the thought of letting Virgil go made his skin itchy, but he did understand that this was it. His dream: realized. He had no wife, and no man to take his hand now at twenty-six years old. He had accepted it was never going to happen.

So Logan couldn’t bear to wait another day.

Virgil gurgled and let out a small little giggle as he squirmed in Logan’s careful hold.

“Yes,” Logan smiled, a soft and quiet one as he looked up at Dr. Picani. “Thank you. I cannot express it enough but… thank you.”

Next Chapter

[sincerelybluevase]

Didn't think all questions from 'Asks' could be proposed, so there you go: all the questions (1 to 96) or as much as you can!

Well thank you, nonny! I shall put these under a cut. 

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? Closed, because you never know what might be in there!

(2) Do You Have Freckles? I wish I did, but alas! My sisters do have them so jealous much. 

(3) Can You Whistle? I can, but I can’t carry a tune I’m afraid. 

(4) Last Song You Listened To. Almost by Hozier. 

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? It’s a tie between blue and red. 

(6) Relationship Status. Taken, and happily so!

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? 16 degrees Celsius, so that’s about 61 F.

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? I woke up from a nightmare, so it wasn’t really the best sort of waking. That said, I’m not cranky per se, just a bit sleepy still.

(9) How Many Followers? 438

(10) Zodiac Sign. Aquarius

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? Blue!

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? Not daily; I take vitamin D tablets you have to take every few days. Before I used to take a different vitamin D tablet daily, though!

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? No but I do talk to myself haha. 

(14) What Books Are You Reading? The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien for a course at university, and Beyond Black by Hilary Mantel for fun. 

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. I don’t think you have to worry about Bilbo. 

(16) Favourite Anime? Hm, probably Howl’s Moving Castle. 

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? I’m trying to remember when I last cried. Either in front of my gf, or in front of my sisters. 

(18) Do You Collect Anything? Books and crystal skulls!

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? Nothing yet, because it is still morning. 

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? Our car isn’t big enough for that haha. 

(21) Favourite Animal? I think I would have to choose otters. 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? I watch parts of it.

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? Well, I usually go up at 9.30, but that doesn’t mean I’m actually aiming for sleep at that point, haha. 

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? I’m allergic to make up, so no.

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? Neither, because I hate swimming. 

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? How could I ever choose?

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? I live in the Netherlands, which has the cleanest tap water in the world. Therefore, drinking bottled water is almost criminal. 

(28) What Makes You Happy? Many things! My gf, my sisters, my dog, good books, writing, playing the piano, petrichor, warmth, hot tea...

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? It depends on what I am studying, truth be told. I do both, though I always use instrumental music. 

(31) Dogs Or Cats? Both. 

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? I don’t know. Probably a pastel blue, maybe orange?

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. Sadly, I have had neither. 

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? Not if I can help it. 

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? Define magic. 

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? I’m wearing a dress. It’s denim, therefore blue. 

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? I can!

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? I’d like to say both, but I mainly spend it. 

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? Yes; my phone case. 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? I wouldn’t call it an obsession, but I have been listening to Lana Del Rey’s new album on repeat, and I’ve found myself craving gothic books.

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? I haven’t. 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? No. 

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? All the freaking time!

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? No; the air is super dry, the seats are cramped and uncomfortable, the food too little and not very good. I do like I’m going somewhere, though. 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. The only thing that comes to mind right now is Shrek the Fourth, which is somewhat embarrassing, but really I cry easily with films.

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? Sunflower seeds, though both are lovely when salted. 

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? Hozier. 

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? I can’t eat gluten and I’m also lactose intolerant, so in that sense I am picky. If it boils down to what I actually like, I’m not. 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? Not at all. 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? Nope!

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? Yes and yes!

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? No because I am perpetually afraid I will damage my ears and go deaf. 

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? I have only ever carved a pumpkin once, so I am going to go with that because it is so new. 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? Mrs de Winter bin ich! From the German musical adaption of Daphne du Maurier’s Rebecca.

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) Transitioning from summer to autumn. 

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now? Some free time so I can finish my first draft and finish the book I’m reading. 

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. No.

(58) What Is Your Gender? Female.

(59) Coffee Or Tea? Tea.

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? I’m doing an English literature master, so I have homework all the time! I have to write a little essay about the letters of Margaret Cavendish, read LOTR, and choose a topic for an essay for my course on British and Irish fantasy novels.

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? Lesbian.

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? Yes.

(63) Favourite Pokemon? Bulbosaur.

(64) Favourite Social Media? Tumblr.

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? They can be fun!

(66) Do You Get Homesick? As a rule, no, but it depends on where I am and most of all with whom.

(67) Are You A Virgin? What a personal question!

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? I don’t use conditioner, but I am using a shampoo bar by Lush which I don’t remember the name of, but it is for blondes and has chamomille and smells like lemon. 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? What an American question! It is not really something I will have to deal with, living in the Netherlands. Still, if it came to it I suppose my car is less dirty than a crappy motel room.

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? Yes.

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? I don’t have one. 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? I don’t really have one. 

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? That fully depends on the person those eyes belong to. As a general rule, brown eyes.

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? I do, and yes!

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? I’m eating a sandwich as we eat. 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? Microsoft’s solitaire collection. 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? I can’t give CPR, but if i could, I would, because I damn well hope someone would give me CPR if I was in that situation. 

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight? Yes.

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? No.

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? Again, depends on the context. 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. I wear one on each thumb and one on my right middle finger. Can’t take a picture ATM

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed? Closed.

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? Brushed my teeth, made breakfast, talked to my gf. It’s 7.45 in the morning, guys.

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? Nothing. 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. I have face moisturiser and that is it guys.

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? A day person.

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. Candy crush friends, and Microsoft solitaire collection.

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened. Well this morning I had a nightmare where I had to perform an exorcism on a loved one, and it didn’t work. Come to think of it, I did try to bless them with ‘the father, the mother, and the holy ghost,’ so that may have had something to do with it not working. 

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? Fanta or 7-up.

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? My gf laughing, rain on leaves (I am not that much of a rain person though), birds. 

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? Sweats are more comfy, Jeans look better. 

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? Tired. 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. Music. 

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? I don’t want one. I am too fickle; I’d grow bored of it after a while.

(96) Favourite YouTuber? I don’t have one favourite since I use youtube for different things. 

[closetspngirl]

I dare you.... ALL of them. Yeah... I said. All. Of. Them. hehehe

Just remember...you asked...

If anyone else is even remotely interested in reading some/any/all my answers to all 100 questions, see below. For the rest of you, I hope the keep reading tab works...

1: is there a boy/girl in your life? Yes

2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them? Not sure yet

3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?” A cat?

4: what’s something you really want right now? Well a couple things...pick a coast...

5: are you afraid of falling in love? Sort of. I’m currently watching it crumble before me...and I’m not sure I can do that to myself again.

6: do you like the beach? I love the beach!

7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else? Yes

8: what’s the background on your cell? A black and white of Jensen playing the guitar. My lock screen is a digital painting of Genevieve’s Ruby.

9: name the last four beds you were sat on? Umm...huh? Mine, my coworkers...a family friend...and I guess my mom’s?

10: do you like your phone? I do.

11: honestly, are things going the way you planned? I mean...no? But they’re looking up.

12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts? One of the sales ladies at work.

13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler? Neither. 

14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain? Probably emotional. I’m a total empath so I can be super sensitive. 

15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum? Depends on what art exhibit is going on.

16: are you tired? Yes. I got 3.5 hours of sleep and this is your cruel way of keeping me awake for at least another hour. lol. It’s a good thing you’re cute. 

17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact? As long as I’ve been at my current job, just over a year.

18: are they a relative? No.

19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes? Fuck. No.

20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with? Uhh...like 30 minutes ago (when was the kiss is a WHOLE other question)

21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? If I knew that that was it for either of us, yet. 

22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again? I mean...maybe on the cheek in a ‘have a nice life’ kinda way

23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? One

24: is there a certain quote you live by? Oh wow...there’s a few that I like but I’m horrible with recalling them.

25: what’s on your mind? a lot of things...

26: do you have any tattoos? I do, three, four is getting added hopefully this year, for sure next year (or it might be five at that point...)

27: what is your favorite color? Purple

28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips? August

29: who are you texting? Does tumblr messaging count? If so, you, and the person I’m texting

30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch? Yes

31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right? Yes

32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? Yes

33: do you think anyone has feelings for you? Yes

34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes? Yes

35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you? Hope she likes it...

36: were you single on valentines day? I mean...strictly speaking, no. Did I go out and do anything? No. I was working.

37: are you friends with the last person you kissed? Uhh...hard to answer.

38: what do your friends call you? By my name, or a few different nicknames

39: has anyone upset you in the last week? YES.

40: have you ever cried over a text? Yes. Both good and bad.

41: where’s your last bruise located? Oh goodness...uh...I think it’s the one on the side of my right knee

42: what is it from? Who the fuck knows...it just showed up one day.

43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad? Yesterday, day before that, Saturday, almost every day last week...

44: who was the last person you were on the phone with? Personal phone: R. Work phone: sales department.

45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes? My converse

46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day? I hate hats.

47: would you ever go bald if it was the style? Never

48: do you make supper for your family? I can, am able, rarely do.

49: does your bedroom have a door? Yes, thank god.

50: top 3 web-pages? Tumblr, IG and...my portfolio currently I guess since I’m trying to update it.

51: do you know anyone who hates shopping? Yeah...me. lol. Ok, not completely true. Clothes shopping is a huge hassle. 

52: does anything on your body hurt? Yes. Head, neck, back, stomach, feet (gotta love a kitchen job)

53: are goodbyes hard for you? Depends on the goodbye, mostly yes

54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself? Uh...probably coffee

55: how is your hair? It’s fine, thanks for asking. HA!. j/k. It’s up in a messy bun and headband

56: what do you usually do first in the morning? Turn off my alarm, See who messaged me and get ready for work

57: do you think two people can last forever? I think it’s possible, as long as both people want it.

58: think back to january 2007, were you single?  No

59: green or purple grapes? Green. Purple grapes are too sweet for me.

60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug? Probably...Friday when L is back at work. Otherwise, August.

61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now? Yes. Didn’t I already answer this? Pick a coast...I want to go there.

62: when will be the next time you text someone? Later tonight

63: where will you be 5 hours from now? In my bed. Asleep. So help me Chuck if I’m not.....

64: what were you doing at 8 this morning. Uhh...just waking up for the third time.

65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked? Other than Jensen/Jared/Dean/Sam? Uhh....Oh I guess I was crushing on B a little...but that ship has long sailed. 

66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile? Absolutely. 

67: did you kiss or hug anyone today? I hugged L. I’m surprised he’s not tired of me yet. lol

68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night? That I really need to be better at letting shit go.

69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? Yes. 

70: how many windows are open on your computer? Windows? One. Tabs...? 10.

71: how many fingers do you have? 8 plus two thumbs.

72: what is your ringtone? Priceless by for KING & COUNTRY

73: how old will you be in 5 months? 31

74: where is your mum right now? South Dakota

75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love? A long list of really shitty reasons.

76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days? No

77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago? Definitely

78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7? At 7? Let’s see...first grade...I don’t think I had a crush on anyone. I remember there was this kid Ben that I hated because he used to take my stuff all the time. OH!! There was this really cute blonde boy that I can’t think of his name right now. He was only there for that year and then left.

79: is there anyone you know with the name mike? Yes! My best friend’s dad. lol. He’s like my second father.

80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms? Umm...I mean technically speaking? Yes...the way I wanted it to be? No. It was more that I fell asleep with my head on them and then they nudged me off so they could roll over...

81: how many people have you liked in the past three months? HA! Well....B...R...J...three. I’ll go with three.

82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days? Yes

83: will you talk to the person you like tonight? Already am

84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? I wouldn’t do that, but if I was...probably my friend Carrie...

85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care? I mean...probably?

86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie? Well...I can’t even remember the last movie I went to go see...I think it was maybe Brooklyn, with my mom. So not a lot other than watching the movie. 

87: who was your last received call from? Work

88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you? Only if it was already dead. Otherwise, no.

89: what is something you wish you had more of? energy...?

90: have you ever trusted someone too much? Yuuuuup.

91: do you sleep with your window open? When I can.

92: do you get along with girls? I do

93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth? Am I keeping a secret? Yes. Do they need to know? No.

94: does sex mean love? No

95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem? Uhh...it’d be boring AF

96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring? No

97: did you sleep alone this week? Yes. Have been for months now.

98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you? I’m working on it. I’d like to think so.

99: do you believe in love at first sight? umm...maybe? not entirely sure

100: who was the last person that you pinky promise? Oh lord...I don’t even remember. lol

Thanks for the challenge!!! xoxox

[transslyblue]

Also "1-99"

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

Haha, closed. I don't like seeing the dark void that I call a closet

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

Yea, but you can't really see them unless you're close

(3) Can You Whistle?

Yes

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame musical, the Tavern Song

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

Blue, but I also like a variety of purples and greens

(6) Relationship Status.

Single and not looking

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

69º F

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Yea, unless I wake up myself

(9) How Many Followers?

118, but I need to go through and block any bots. (;w;)

(10) Zodiac Sign.

Leo

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

Blue/green hazel. My eyes are multi-coloured so they have blue, green, and brown with a very grey look to them.

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

I forget daily

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

Yup!

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

I really want to get back to reading some more Lovecraft, but i don't have much time to read

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

"Minutes before librarians ate him."

(16) Favourite Anime?

Uuuuhhhhhh, hm. I guess it'd have to be InuYasha, but I like a lot of anime

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

Err,,, it was a very close friend. Idk if they'd want me to say who they are tho

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

Rocks and those snowglobe musicboxes

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

Yogurt and a protein bar. Ik, ik real healthy and filling

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

Depends on the song, but not really

(21) Favourite Animal?

Owls and cats

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

Not really, but when I do it's the diving Olympics

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

2am

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

I don't wear makeup. Though I have considered it

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Either. Pool is safer though

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

Oof, idk if I can pick just one, so imma name a few. @ohhimarx @mirosuikaaa @masochist-incarnate they're all really friendly and nice

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

Whichever is most convenient at the time

(28) What Makes You Happy?

The sound of rain, art, my friends talking to me, I have a list that I've posted, so I won't list out here

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

Haha, I don't study;;;

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

Cats

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

Blue-tiful lol, for real though probably bubble blue

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

Does Switch/ds count?

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

Idunknow

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

Not really, but I won't bash on anyone who does

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

Black, but is a Link being a meme

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

Yes

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

I save more then I spend.

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Yea, it's a pink pillow of Lion from Steven Universe and a music stand from when I was in middle school

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

Kirby in general

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

Nope, but I have touched one before

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

Yes and no. It really depends on how long I've been around them

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Omg yes! I remember a few and they were all lucid dreams! (I looked up the term from last time I answered this question)

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

Never been on one

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

Of Mice and Men

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Both

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Panic!At the Disco, Fallout Boy, or The Neighborhood

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

Not really. There are some foods I refuse to eat, but otherwise I eat pretty much anything

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

Yes

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

Nope! I actually like thunder

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

I enjoy reading. As for writing, eh. I'll write out my ideas but I'mno good at fleshing them out to be interesting

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

Yes. But not too loud, just enough where I don't hear everyone around me

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Carve pumpkins! I really am bad at wrapping presents

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Hurts - Illuminated

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Spring and dying from pollen

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now?

Idk, something salty tbh

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

(58) What Is Your Gender?

I'm a transgender male, so i use he/him pronouns.

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

Both, but I like tea more

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

I'm not in school anymore soooo no

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

Idk. Questioning I guess

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

No

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

I already answered this one, so I'll say a new pokemon that I love. Rowlet!

(64) Favourite Social Media?

Bruh I am not a fan, but Tumblrs the one I'm on most.

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

Idk. I don't have an Instagram

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

Yes

(67) Are You A Virgin?

Yes, and I plan to stay that way for awhile

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

I use Suave, but I also use TeaTree when I get really bad dandruff

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

Depends on the place. But most likely I'd risk the motel.

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

My mom yes, my biological father... It's complicated

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

I don't really watch movies, so none

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

I don't have an ex

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

Be the person you needed when you were younger. I have no clue who said it, but I live by that

(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

Eyes in general are great. Idk how anyone can not find something they like in any eye colour

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

YesYesYesYes

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Nachos

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

Voez and Pokémon Go

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

Yes, because no oen deserves to die. I'd do my best to help any homeless person

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

Haha, not today. Yet

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

Not really

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

Yes!

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

I don't wear jewlery much. But I would like to get my ears pierced properly

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed! I don't want people or my cat to walk in

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

I woke up, did laundry, answered these questions

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

Pajama pants and a t-shirt

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

I've got none. Unless you want me to name what body wash i use. :/

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

Night person

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

Phone: Voez, Pokémon Go

Switch: Legend of Zeld: Breath of the wild, Super Smash Bros Ultimate, Kirby Star Allies, Mario Kart 8, PuyoPuyo Tetris, Bayonetta 1&2, Hyrule Warriors, Just Dance 2017, Super Mario Party, Let's Go Eevee, Mario Odyssey, Undertale, Shovel Knight, Pokémon quest, Mom Hid my Game, Deemo, Sonic Mania, Detention, The Coma, Cave Story

3DS: Kirby Clash Deluxe, Kirby Triple Deluxe, Kirby's Extra Epic Yarn, Kirby Planet Robobot, Kirby Canvas Curse, Kirby Mass Attack, Kirbg Super Star Ultra, Kirby Squeak Squad, Pokémon Y, Pokémon Platinum, Pokémon Ultra Moon, Pokémon Alpha Sapphire Pokémon Heartgold, Legend of Zelda Link Between Worlds, Legend of Zelda Majoras Mask, Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time 3D, Legend of Zelda Phantom Hourglass, Legend of Zelda Spirit Tracks, Super Smash Bros, Luigi's Mansion Dark Moon, Wario Ware Gold, Super Princess Peach, Animal Crossing New Leaf, Castlevania Dawn of Sorrow, Cooking Mama, Cooking Mama 2, Sonic Colors

Gameboy Color: Pokemon Blue, Legend of Zelda Link's Awakening

This is over the course of many years

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

I had this dream where I was flying a red paper plane. It took forever to carry it up this tapestry, but i did it. When I finally took off this group of white paper planes were chasing me so I shook them off and landed, taking shelter in this museum. This museum held other people hiding and was actually an abandoned grocery store. Then I woke up.

I don't rememebr when this was, but I wrote it down. I have a few more if you're interested.

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

Strawberry Ramuné

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

Rainstorms,

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

Jeans, since I can't wear sweatpants to work

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

Uhhh, probably a slob since I've been in pajamas all day

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

Stuffed animals

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

Idk. Haven't really wanted one. Maybe a connect the dots one.

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

Idk. I watch Pyrocynical and Markiplier, but other than that I listen to music, watch speedpaints, and speed plays of various videogames

[thebluejayawe]

37 for 37+63 pretty please from the winter prompts

Here you go lovely :)

“Hey congrats man.”

Patrice blinks at Pasta. “Uh- Thanks? But for what?”

David just laughs. “I mean I figured it’d been going on for a while, but damn Bergy, how’d he talk you into coming out with a christmas card?”

Can also be read here.

The door to Patrice’s apartment nearly loses its hinges as Brad bursts his way through it, waving something in his hand and carry a backpack. “You’re helping me!” He yells from the kitchen.

Patrice just sighs from where he sits on the couch. On his TV screen he watches as a Mike evades the cops in the very first episode of Suits. “Hey Brad, come on in. How are you doing? Oh that’s good. I’m pretty great by the way, thanks for asking. No I’m not exhausted, why would you say that? Sure make yourself at him.” He says dryly, and rolls his shoulders back.

Marchy waltzes into the living room and drops himself onto the couch. He shoves a plate into Patrice’s lap and puts two glasses of water on the small coffee table. “Here, you should eat.”

“How do you know I haven’t already?” Bergy mumbles, even as he starts attempting to pick up the hastily made sandwich.

“Because it’s our off day and since you haven’t showered or shaved or gotten dressed yet despite it being three in the afternoon, so you probably didn’t eat breakfast until like ten. And you weren’t planning on eating again until like six.”

And, well- that’s fair, he supposes. (It’s not that he wasn’t planning on it, it’s just it’s off day, and he was so happy to stay on the couch in his pajamas and watch Suits from the beginning while napping intermittently. And the kitchen is far away and he was comfortable. Sue him.)

“Wat’ev’r.” He mumbles around a mouthful, watching as Brad pulls a laptop out of his bad and starts fiddling with the thing. “What are we doing? Did something happen?” It certainly wouldn’t be the first time he’s been kept out of the loop of some major development in hockey. A lot can happen in a few hours. He eyes his phone warily, but the device remains unaffected where it sits on the side table.

Marchy just waves his hand. He takes another bite of his sandwich and leans forward to watch the screen over Brads shoulder. He makes a surprised noise when his liney pulls up some website for pictures. Or something. Cards?

“What are we-”

“Me and you.” Brad smiles at him, that wide cheeky one that has Patrice eyeing him suspiciously.

“Me and you.” He repeats skeptically, then feels his eyes widen when Brad clicks the mouse a few times and pulls up a new page. “Absolutely not.” He shakes his head vehemently. “No chance.”

Marchy pouts. “Oh come on Bergy!!! This is perfect! You hate doing Christmas cards, I hate doing Christmas cards, both our moms will murder us if we don’t send them out. This is the best solution. Me and you sit our asses down and knock out one universal Christmas card, order some chinese food, and then we’re done.”

Patrice opens his mouth to protest and then closes it again.

It’s not…the worst argument. Plus he’ll get to spend the day with Brad, which is much better than being alone. Or being with most other people. Really Brad is like…his favorite person at the moment.

Who is he kidding. Brad’s been his favorite person to hang out with for years now. It’s kinda how the best friends thing goes.

“God damn it.” He mutters, and Marchy lights up.

“Awesome!” He drops the laptop down and vaults over the back of the couch and runs to Patrice’s junk room. “Where do you keep all your pictures?”

Bergy just stares down at his half eaten sandwich and tries to ignore how hard he’s smiling.

……

*

His mom texts him in December, and he calls her back despite the fact that he’s about to get on a plane.

“Hey Mom.”

“Patrice! I’m so proud of you honey!” He feels himself smile wryly at himself, and switches to french to answer.

“So you got the card?”

“Of course! I knew it would only take a few dozen years of threatening to castrate you before you’d get it through your head.”

He sighs. The bus is slowing to a stop. “Only a dozen. But um…what did you mean? In your text.”

His mom huffs impatiently like she does when she thinks Patrice should understand something he doesn’t. “I thought it was pretty clear, Patrice. Make sure we get to see Brad this year! I’ve missed that boy.”

“Mom you’ve met him once, and for like five minutes-”

“Four times, actually.”

Patrice sits forward in his seat. “Have you been counting?!” He cries, then looks around quickly. Luckily the guys are just standing and grabbing their shit, not paying attention to him. “I’ve got to go. I’ll ask him alright? But don’t get your hopes up. He’s probably gonna spend the holidays with his family.”

His mom just laughs, which, what does that mean mom, but he really does have to go, so they exchange ‘i love you’s and he hangs up.

Brad sidles up to him as they walk to the plane and nods to his phone, which Patrice is still staring at with a confused expression. “What was that about?” He asks.

“Nothing. Just my mom.”

Marchy’s brow furrows, worry flashing across his face. Patrice pretends to not notice his heart thumping happily at the concern. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah.” He assures, way to quickly. “Everything’s fine.”

…….

Everything is not fine.

It’s very, very not fine. The problem is that he doesn’t know, exactly, why it is not fine. He doesn’t even know what it is, really, just that people are acting really weird.

Example: he’s on a short roadie, which, cool whatever hockey. But in the two days they’re gone, he’s gotten a text from almost everyone in his family and several of his friends, all of which tell him they’re happy for him, or that they can’t wait to see him, or some variation of support. This includes a weird snapchat from Seggy, which - okay, he can’t decipher Tyler’s snaps on a good day, but this one is particularly confusing. Something about…losing a bet? Who knows, there was a lot of yelling and loud music in the background.

Whatever. Apparently Jamie is mad at him. Or something.

He doesn’t text anyone back anything other than some ‘thank you’s and a few ‘yeah you too’s and a question mark to Segs. He doesn’t ask anyone “what the fuck are you talking about”, because honestly what does that say about him? Clearly it’s not a bad thing, he just doesn’t know what they’re talking about.

It’s disconcerting. Worrying too. But not as worrying as how Brad suddenly just ditches him the entire trip. He knows it’s only two days, but still, they usually hang out at night on roadies.

He gets no text on his phone and no knock on his door and no apology or explanation the next day.

“What the fuck is going on.” He groans as he drops down into his seat next to Rask after a shootout win against the ducks. A game that involved nearly zero talk between him and Marchy.

Tuuks just keeps looking at his phone, but chimes in with an emotionless “Mood.”

“Why am I friends with you?” He groans. Tukka just shrugs.

“Your choice man.”

“Shut up.”

……..

“Hey Patrice can I talk to you for a sec?”

He lifts his head up, and then tilts it back some more. Sitting on the floor stretching out and looking up at Chara is a…long distance to look. The soft spoken captain actually looks worried.

Oh wonderful.

“Yeah, sure Z.” He mumbles, and folds his legs under him. He takes Chara’s offered hand and pulls himself up. Together they walk into the back hall that’s behind the gym. None of the guys are there. It’s quiet.

He swallows thickly and takes a deep breath.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks quietly, staring at the floor until he realizes that this is Z, for crying out loud. Not only does he demand respect as a captain, but he also helped give Patrice the A. He should be able to look him in the eyes, so he tries his best to bring his gaze upward.

Chara isn’t angry though, he’s…concerned? Or- something else. He almost looks sad.

“No, of course not.” Z’s quiet voice used to unnerve him, except it’s almost always the same level of calm, so he got used to it. Now though, he’s talking like he’s afraid of spooking Patrice. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”

He blinks. “What?”

His captains eyes dart to the ground for a second and it clicks.

Nervous. Chara is nervous.

What the hell.

“If I ever made you feel like it was wrong, or if anyone on the team ever did, I apologize.” He smiles, and it’s hesitant. “I am happy for you though. It’s great to see you happy, you know.”

“I- um, I’m sorry, did you- are we- what’s-” A door opening behind them cuts off his stammering and has Patrice nearly jumping out of his skin. It’s just one of the staff, but Chara backs up and smiles again, not really strained this time, but still hesitant.

“We can talk more later.” He says, and then disappears around the corner.

Patrice stares after him. Now alone in the hallway, he pushes both hands through his hair.

“What the fuck is going on?” He whisper yells. The hall just echoes his voice back at him, cold and empty and answerless.

…..

The final straw is after the game. They got home from the roadie last last night, and then had to play again, and now it’s almost eleven. They worked hard but lost to the bolts anyway, and the locker room is subdued. Disappointed and tired, there isn’t much normal activity going around, and after media it doesn’t really get any better. Coach talks to them and dismisses them to get some rest, and that’s when Pasta drops down into the stall next to him.

“I’m sorry.”

Bergy rolls his eyes. “What is it with everyone apologizing to me? What the fuck did you all do that was so bad?”

Pasta’s eyes widen and Patrice instantly feels bad.

“I was- the turnover in the third.” He clarifies, and Bergy closes his eyes and pinches his nose. He starts to apologize but David just waves him off and shoots him a sympathetic look.

“It wasn’t your fault anyway. You don’t have to apologize for that.”

“Yeah, but I wanted to. You look…stressed.”

“Gee thanks.” He mumbles, tugging at his socks.

“Hey congrats by the way.”

Patrice blinks at Pasta. Some slightly hysterical part of him wants to wail ‘please god not you too Pasta’. Instead he grits his teeth and decides to ask, because if Pasta is fucking with him then he’s definitely gonna know. “Uh- Thanks? But for what?”

David just laughs. “I mean I figured it’d been going on for a while, but damn Bergy, how’d he talk you into coming out with a Christmas card?”

“He bribed me with Chinese.” His responds, relaxing for a few seconds. Pasta takes it in stride, nodding like that makes sense, and even gets all the way back to his own stall before it registers in Patrice’s brain what he actually said.

‘...coming out with a Christmas card…’

He stares at his hands, frozen.

Coming out.

The fucking christmas card. He and Brad- and what the fuck does that mean, ‘I figured it’d been going on for a while’?!?!

He lifts his gaze to scan the locker room, searching out one particular face,and- yep. There’s Marchy, staring at him with wide eyes and a distraught expression. His team is moving around the locker room without a care, yelling at each other and throwing gear everywhere and arguing about the stupidest things. Normal locker room stuff.

Marchy bites his lip and drops his gaze suddenly, and that’s how Patrice realizes he’s still mostly in his hockey shit while Brad is tying the laces on his dress shoes, ready to go home.

“Oh.” He croaks. “Oh fuck.”

……..

He gives exactly three fucks about how late at night it is, and all of them disappear when Marchand fails to answer his phone. All five times he calls him.

‘I’m standing outside your door, asshole. Open the fuck up before i wake up every single one of your neighbors.’ He texts angrily. When nothing is given in return except for a ‘Read, 12:02 AM’ underneath the text bubble, he doesn’t hesitate in repeatedly slamming his fist into the plain apartment door. There’s a loud crash from inside, and he keeps ‘knocking’ until there’s someone scrambling behind the door and suddenly Brad is there yanking the door open so fast that Patrice almost hits him in the face with his hand.

He doesn’t bother with whatever words they might’ve exchanged, he just barges right into the apartment keeping his shoes on because he’s too worked up to be polite. He hears the door shut behind him, and he runs a hand through his hair.

“What the hell Patrice?! You can’t just-”

“No! No you don’t get to yell at me for this.” He whirls around and he’s so, so angry but he’s also hurt. He’s covering for it, stretching the little bit of anger and betrayal he felt when he met Brad’s eyes in the locker room. “You knew! You knew what was going on and instead of growing a pair and talking to me you avoided me for three fucking days!”

Marchy looks like he’s caught between pissed and guilty. “I didn’t want you to be angry okay?!”

“Too fucking late!” Patrice yells back. “You realize that I had an entire conversation with my mom right? She thinks we’re together. My entire family has apparently always known I’ve been gay, Z thinks he failed as a captain because we didn’t tell him earlier, fucking- even Tuukka called me after the game, because he thought someone did something to make us want to stay hidden and he was about to murder. Jesus christ Marchand! I had to find out from Pasta that everyone thought we were together, and those fucking cards were us announcing it!”

He watches Brad’s eyes narrow and something else flashes across his face, to quick for Patrice to identify. “Is the thought of us together really that disgusting to you?”

“That’s not why I’m angry, what the fuck?”

Brad crosses his arms. “Seems like it is.”

“I’m pissed because you knew, and you knew that I didn’t but you still said nothing.” He snarls. His chest is heaving and his throat is raw and he hates this. He doesn’t even know why it hurts so much that Brad didn’t tell him. He can blame it on humiliation - which he does, continuing with “I look like an idiot now you realize that right? How am I supposed to tell everyone we aren’t together when I never denied it outright?”

-but it’s not the truth.

It does hurt getting kept in the dark. It stings even more that it’s Brad who let it happen, but what really punches him in the chest is knowing that they aren’t together. That he’ll have to make those phone calls and have awkward conversations when he could be smiling with Brad by his side. The idea of them together doesn’t piss him off - it’s that fact that them together is only an idea, not a reality. He has to deal with the repercussions of an idea, when he should be planning out the future.

Marchy opens his mouth, closes it, then growls “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier” out through his teeth. Bergy steps back, his anger suddenly spent. He sits on the arm of the couch and buries his hands in his hair, head bowed.

“God this is so fucked up.” He whispers, and forces himself to straighten. Looking at Brad he can see what he didn’t before - the exhaustion painted on his figure, the way he’s holding himself like he needs comfort that he can’t get, he pain in his eyes as he stares at Bergy.

And then a few things click.

“Marchy.” He says lowly, looking at the hardwood floor in front of his feet. “How long did you know?”

Marchands eyes instantly move from his face to the wall, then to the coffee table and then they settle on the windows. “I-”

“How long?”

He swallows. “Since- before we left. My mom must’ve gotten hers pretty fast I guess. But…I- I had looked at them before we ordered them, and I thought…well maybe.”

Patrice stands slowly, shoving his hands in the pockets of his coat so he can ignore the way they’re shaking. “You thought people might think we were together, and you sent them anyway?”

Brad looks like he’s about to cry now, but at least he’s looking at Patrice again. “Yeah.” He whispers. He takes a breath, even steps forward, halfheartedly reaches out a hand for him. “I’m- I’m so sorry Patrice, I didn’t want to- I just- it was a spur of the moment thing and I didn’t really think it would explode like it did.”

Marchy is close enough now that there’s barely a few feet between them. If Patrice reaches forward he could touch his arm. “You live your life in spur of the moment decisions.” He murmurs. “Never thought I’d hear you apologize for one.”

“This one hurt you.” Brad says, painfully real. “You deserve an apology for that.”

Patrice shakes his head. “God you really don’t know do you?” Marchy only blinks up at him. “Everyone I talked to on the team dropped some sort of inclination like they knew we had been dating for a while. I think part of the reason I didn’t deny them is because…I wanted that. This hurt me because it wasn’t true, Marchy. I was getting congratulation texts for something I hadn’t won. The idea of us doesn’t disgust me, it makes me happy, but what hurt the most was knowing I’d never ever have you. I’d have to tell everyone the thing I wanted the most wasn’t real.”

He looks down at his shoes and shakes his head. “I don’t- I don’t know if that’s what you wanted, but I-”

He’s cut off by arms grabbing his arms and pushing him backwards into the wall, his back hitting it with a soft thump. A noise of protest might come from him, he’s not sure, because his brain short circuits shortly after that.

Brads lips crash against his and Patrice melts.

His lips are chapped and he tastes like that stupid mint gum he always chews after games and he’s kissing him.

It’s sloppy at first, and the force of Brad kissing means their noses are squished together for a second, but Patrice gets with the program pretty quickly. He takes control of the kiss, one hand cupping Brads face to slow him down, the other in his hair to encourage him. He tilts his head down and Brads up, and his skin sings with feeling, nerve endings coming alive with excitement.

When they finally break apart it’s for necessity of air. Patrice has to stop Brad from rushing back in, even though it physically pains him to do so. “Wait.” He gasps, and Marchy makes a noise that sends a shiver down his back.

“Okay.” Brad whispers, and Patrice nods, “Okay-” and they’re kissing again, and again, and he actually has to tear his lips from Brad’s to get more air and try and clear his head.

“Wait- wait a second okay, just a second.” He laughs when Brad huffs in disappointment. “I assume we’re on the same page here right? Like- we’re trying this. Together?”

Marchy nods so fast his head nearly falls off. “Yeah. Yes. I mean- if you want, because I definitely want.”

He laughs again and kisses him, short and sweet. “I think I got that.” He murmurs against his lips, hands rising to rest at Marchy’s side. “Have to thank you though.” He says through a grin.

Brad pulls back, surprised and says “What, why?” then rolls his eyes at himself.

Patrice rolls his eyes back. “Well, while you did put me in a lot of awkward situations, you also sorta just saved me from those situations, so…”

His excited laughter echoes in the apartment, fading quietly as they make their way to the bedroom. The door to the bedroom quietly, gently, clicks shut behind them.

Bonus:

Patrice calls his mom back two days later. He had to have a long conversation with Z and then with Coach and then with Z and Coach, but he did it all with Marchy by his side. They’re good now. They’ve been good, for such a long time now, and Patrice feels like he just never noticed until now.

As in, right now, with Marchy tucked into his side on the couch while some random cooking show plays. It’s snowing outside and the world hasn’t ended despite being out to his team about being in a same sex relationship in the least inclusive major professional sport. Christmas is in a week and he gets to call his mom to say that she was right.

“Yeah mom. Yeah I know. No, he called his family already. Well he wasn’t going anywhere originally- yeah we got the tickets. Yes. Yes, jesus christ, I- sorry.” He smiles down at the sleeping body next to him and has to suppress an honest to god giggle when Brad mumbles some nonsense about carrots and the Flyers. “He’s coming home with me.”

[starchild--27]

85 questions

I was tagged by @kafkascupcake .  This will be fun, so thanks ^^

rules: answer 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people

last

1. drink – water with lemon flavour

2. phone call - my hair dresser (if i ignore the fact that i accidently called my dad a few momnets ago when i wanted to look up my last phone call - ofc this had to happen xD)

3. text message - i told some kid from my spanish class tht we didn’t have spanish class last week

4. song you listened to – Californiacation by Red Hot Chili Peppers

5. time you cried - three days ago i think, but i waas at the verge of crying yesterday evening  

6. dated someone twice? – nope. i never dated anyone 

7. kissed someone and regretted it – nope

8. been cheated on – no

9. lost someone special – i’m so grateful to say that i never lost anyone in my life and i am so afraid of the day this will happen to me

10. been depressed - kind of. i have my depressed moments but everyone has at some point

11. gotten drunk and thrown up – never, i’m not drinking much 

fave colours

12. navy blue

13. black

14. metallic shades of basically every colour

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends – i’m always careful with the word friend when it comes to my real life, but let’s say i got to know some people better that have been around for a longer time but i never really interacted with. on the internet things are a little different, so i can say i’ve interacted with a lot of people here and i can’t help but treat them as friends 

16. fallen out of love – not in the last year

17. laughed until you cried - multiple times xD

18. found out someone was talking about you – i really don’t know and i hate that i can’t say this wouldn’t bother me because i really want to know what people think of me - just to be able to understand why they treat me how they do. 

19. met someone who changed you - oh, i really don’t know. i think i didn’t change that much in the last 365 days

20. found out who your friends are – it was a little more than a year ago, but yes i did.

21. kissed someone on your Facebook friends list – i don’t even have facebook

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl – since i don’t have facebook i’ll do this for instagram and there it is probably a minority since i follow countless art pages, celebrities, fanpages, animal pages, political pages, people i don’t know in real life, …

23. do you have any pets - yes - a black cat with the name Black Pearl, which we gave him before i even knew about the song by EXO ^^ his name referred to the ship from Pirates of the Carribbean first xD

24. do you want to change your name – i did in the past, because my name is very rare where i live. but i started to like it after some time. the great thing is that it’s meaning differs since no one really knows it’s true origin. 

25. what did you do for your last birthday - i invited my two best friends but one happened to be sick at that day (ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ) so we were only two but it was great anyway. since i was born the day after walpurgis night we went to the bonfire and spent some time there

26. what time did you wake up today – 7 am but i slept in again and got at 11:20 

27. what were you doing at midnight last night – reading or sleeping, i don’t know for sure

28. what is something you can’t wait for – vacation with my family and the summer holidays in general (school was … much in the last weeks.)

30. what are you listening to right now – the sound of me slamming my fingers on my laptop’s keyboard while writing this lol

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom – i did, in fact to more than one

32. something that gets on your nerves – that i have to go to school for one more year (i hate this place wholeheartedly) but i don’t know what to do with my life after graduating 

33. most visited website - tumblr and youtube

34. hair color – my natural hair colour is brown but i dye it ginger red and i love it

35. long or short hair – pretty long actually, but i have curls so it’s pretty hard to notice how long 

36. do you have a crush on someone -  if we ignore my celebrity crushes then … i don’t know…probably no. i’m not sure about this one boy though but…yeah, i don’t really know him that well and i probably only like the idea i have of how he could be. (this is btw so typical for me xD)

37. what do you like about yourself – don’t get me wrong, i know it sounds tragical and sad, but i don’t have something i like 100% about myself. i am used to it though because i’ve been this way since forever, having high standards for me (and for others probably too, which is very unfair from me) but the closest to 100% is my talent for music.     

38. want any piercings? – only at my ears

39. blood type – A positive

40. nicknames – the most common nickname for my name is Selmi but hardly anyone except for my mom and my sister calls me like that anymore. other than that i have the feeling my friends and i don’t have nicknames but more like pet names for each other. like, i was called “Flauschebausch” (in english “Fluffpuff”) not that long ago (it referred to my hair). i would also count “squirrel”, “the stars” and all that stuff as nicknames but we don’t really call each other often like that in person xD     

41. relationship status - single 

42. zodiac - Taurus (but most of the stuff people say about tauruses are not 100% true for me)

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows – lately i finished Game Of Thrones and i liked it so damn much, especially the ending (i really don’t get why it was so hated, but i’ll not explain further - i don’t want to write an essay here xD). i also enjoy watching Gilmore Girls from time to time, but hardly anyone in my generation knows it. and since i read it at @kafkascupcake ‘s post for this tag i just remembered how much i liked Memories of the Alhambra too (gosh, how i waited for every episode to air … i still remember this impatient feeling so well)

45. tattoos – i’m not allowed to have any yet but i’m thinking about getting smaller ones later since i think tattoos are pretty. buuuuut i’m also afraid because i can’t really imagine the pain

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery – yeah. unspectecular story tho.

48. piercings - only earrings but one of my friends and i plan on getting helix piercings soon (originally this was planned to be done before last christmas but we never found time)

49. sport – no no no no no. i hate it. i always did. i did some horse riding in my childhood but that’s it. i’m just not able to coordinate my body so a fail at basically every kind of sport. and i am easily frustrated when i fail at something so i never really tried to ace sports.  

50. vacation – my last vacation was when i visited Berlin with my two best friends and m next vacation will be in Denmark with my family

51. trainers – Converse Chucks, always and forever

more general

52. eating – i used to be a very picky eater but it gets better with every year. lately i really like spicy food. but i also have a terrible sweet tooth. i am surprised how i am still like super slim …

53. drinking – a trait i inherited from my dad: i love milk. but i also like juices, tea, coffee (with milk ofc xD) and plain water too

54. i’m about to watch – Avengers Endgame. like today. in 2 hrs.

55. waiting for – my train ride to the next bigger city for seeing endgame. and for me getting an idea what i want to do with my life

56. want – to travel and to make music. my two passions

57. get married – i don’t think it’s necessary for a happy relationship but it depends on the person. to be honest, i like the thought of getting married but i totally understand if someone doesn’t like it.

58. career – the biggest question mark in my life rn

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - hugs. i can’t even explain why. but hugs.

60. lips or eyes - i thinj i look at the eyes first. but i am damned if a person has beautiful lips too

61. shorter or taller – taller

62. older or younger - not important

63. nice arms or stomach – yeah ofc stomachs are great. but let’s be real here: i’m a swooning bitch for nice arms.

64. hookup or relationship – relationship. i am a hopeless romantic

65. troublemaker or hesitant - i am an overthinker, which makes me the epitome of hesitant.

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger – never kissed anyone lol

67. drank hard liquor – only mixed with juice

68. lost glasses - yeah. wasn’t cool.bc without glasses i am literally blind

69. turned someone down - kind of.

70. sex on first date - no

71. broken someone’s heart – i hope not.

72. had your heart broken – yip. my first heavy crush was not that happy. but i am over it since the guy was and still is a jerk and i don’t even know why i fell for him anymore

73. been arrested - no

74. cried when someone died - yes

75. fallen for a friend – never

do you believe in

76. yourself – depends on the situation.

77. miracles - there are moments in which i do

78. love at first sight - yes

79. santa claus -  no

80. kiss on a first date – yeah.. i think itmight happen xD

81. angels - who knows? it would be great though.

other

82. best friend’s name - deer of the sun @swiftfeatherscorner and cat of the moon @fille-de-janvier xD i don’t know if they’d like to have their real names published here but here you ahve their tumblrs

83. eye color - i looked it up someday and it’s called glasz - a strange mix between green, blue and grey with some golden dots and marks. depends on the lightning which colour is stronger.

84. fave movie – impossible to tell.

85. fave actor – also impossible to tell. there are so many good actors in this world

i’m not even sure if 20 people will read this so i’ll just tag everyone who has time to answer 85 questions xD

[vampireloreskill]

Get To Know Me 

tagged by @fourfinefreshfishforyou a billion years ago, thank you so much!! i actually Did have fun filling this out even if it took me forever 

 anyone who still wants to do this can say i tagged them!

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Who wrote this? A fed??

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? Kris

3. BIRTHDAY? This year

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? Would you believe me if I said Warriors

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? Ghosts no, aliens sort of... I’m not sure I buy into whole other civilizations but I find it hard to believe that there isn’t some kind of life outside of our planet even if it’s just bacteria 

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? Rick Riordan is pretty cool

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? Christmas

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? Strawberry or peach 

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? Amazing

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG?  Your Type - Carly Rae Jepson

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? I’m a big fan of defenestration

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO?  Your Type - Carly Rae Jepson

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? I don’t like to blanket recommend shows because everyone has such different tastes

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? Tbh I just mope around until I either feel better or give up and go to sleep

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? This is an Assassin’s Creed and Sims zone ONLY

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? Strangers on the internet knowing my second biggest fear

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? Objectively it’s probably my ability to see things from other people’s perspective but TBH I much prefer my sense of humor and ability to laugh at my own jokes whether or not anyone else finds them funny 

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? My inability to self moderate

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? I want to say neither,, but I may be leaning towards dogs in recent years :/

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? Winter, but lately Autumn has been sneaking up on it

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? Nah

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? Being small... I loved hiding in tiny spaces and being picked up

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? *cowboy voice* Now there’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time...

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? Dark brown

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? At this point it’s basically black but I still like to say dark brown

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? God, my family, probably a lot of people idk I catch feelings easily

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? Literally no one but God 

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? A lot of seemingly random celebrities, if you count constantly reciting names in specific patterns as thinking 

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? Yes, lots of things! 

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? lmao

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? REDWALLLLL

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? I’m not sure what the opposite of shrug emoji is but the answer is still no one

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? I’m not, but someone needs to tell me that

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? I’m not sure I have any phobias? Irrational fears, Sure

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? Behind it!

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? I REALLY want to get into dollhousing

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? I know I said Les Misérables in a previous tag meme but I now remember that I actually read the first book in C.S. Lewis’s space trilogy a while back more recently

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Spider-man: Into The Spiderverse which was........ AMAZING 

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? When I was younger I had a lap harp but that’s about it

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? Opossums

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? I’m not a fan of naming names in this context sorry!

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? A lot, but I’ve concluded that for any powers gained I would inevitably just end up becoming a super villain and/or batman so hard pass

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? When I first wake up, and just lie there trying to hold on to what I was just dreaming about

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? It’s basically physically impossible for me not to grin like a fool watching Wander Over Yonder

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? Does Wii Bowling count

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? Apple cider

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? I don’t know? Probably when I wanted to wake up at a certain time

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? Sometimes? Depends on how possible it is that I could fall

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? Dry skin currently 

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? I was going to say no but I have the distinct feeling that I have even though I didn’t remember absolutely anything about it except maybe the auditorium?

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? No

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? Zookeeper

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? Um. Eternia?? ajfghdk 

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? Not growing as a person

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? Not really, but I do like the ability to turn on lights if I need to

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? My vocal cords were made for Christmas carols and little else. But yeah, sometimes.

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? I’m not... sure?

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? I’ll let you know when I’ve found it

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? Where I already do

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? Yes

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? Night owl

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? Sunsets

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? I feel like I could make an educated guess in an emergency

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? Headphones

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? No

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? I feel like it’s probably pop or disco tbh

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? Jesus 

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? Here and there, the only series I’ve actually read all the way through is Cable & Deadpool (2004) but I want to get into Venom

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? Not to be cliche but injustice of any kind

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? Real book, I like turning pages and the way the cover fits into my hands. Can’t say I’m a fan of the smell though.

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? Vocabulary

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? Yes

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? Sims 4 packs

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′2 or so

75. CAN YOU COOK? If it involves anything other than a microwave or a toaster then,,, no

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? Vampires, villains in love, wood paneling 

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? Intrusive thoughts, Marius Pontmercy, mint flavored toothpaste

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? I... Have more female mutuals

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? Bisexual but like it’s Complicated. Also this is the first time I’ve ever actually said that directly so ✌️🎉

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? A fed wrote this

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? My mom

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Earlier this month

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? I don’t really follow any, but I used to be obsessed with the videos of this one guy who acted out crossovers of DC/Marvel characters with action figures and had a really great voice

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? I do! I just never do anything with them once I’ve taken them lol

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? I don’t have one right now, but I adore choose your own adventure ones

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? Pretty good with my adoptive parents. I want to be closer with my birth mom but I don’t... really know how to go about that without being a disappointment. Never met my birth dad which has been eating at me somewhat lately.

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? Uhh Australian maybe??

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? Mexico

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 6

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? Do you take me for a clown

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? Yes, I’m a nondenominational christian 

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OF THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? The ocean, it’s teeming with life and I find it bafflingly fascinating how there’s still so much we don’t know about it

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? Absolutely not

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? Almost every single time we go shopping in Sam’s Club I get inexplicably feverish and nauseous and feel like I’ve thrown out my back until we get to the check out. That and I may have a dairy allergy? But honestly my stomach is acting out every other day so who knows really.  

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? Ye

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? No

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? Not as often as I should

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? Aesthetically, the beach, but forests are less sandy

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? Pat, don’t rub (When drying your hands)

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR?  mmMM I don’t really lie, like, seriously about stuff that I can recall? I’ll jokingly say stuff that blatantly isn’t true and even then I sometimes feel guilty and confess seconds later. Unless you count lying by omission? Or saying stuff like “I’m fine” LMAO. The World May Never Know

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? We Don’t Discuss Harry Potter On This Blog, but ravenclaw all the way and any test that tries to sort me into hufflepuff isn’t Valid 

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? Generally just when I’m alone

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? Introvert

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? I’ve tried, but I just don’t have the attention span for it asdfgh. Sometimes I write down my dreams though.

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? Yes

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Convince someone else to pick it up and check for ID

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? Yes

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? That’s a personal question

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? Yes

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? No

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? Count Dracula from Monster Family (2017) ok so,,, i know he tried to freeze the entire world because a married woman rejected him but LISTEN

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? No

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? Following Jesus

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? Mm, not karma per say, but I do generally think that what goes around often comes around in way or another

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? No

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? NO

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? Idk! there a lot different types of smart people

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? Nice try, but someone might actually read this

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? I’m basically nocturnal so... yeah

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOUR CLOTHES? Various jewel tones

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? Ehhhhhhh

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? Not that I know of

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 21

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? I can’t really think of one right now

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? Whichever I’m in the mood for!

[cosmiicorvid]

fucking all of them

you absolute fool.

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

I keep it a little cracked open because my cat likes to sleep in there for whatever reason.

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

No but I want some.

(3) Can You Whistle?

Yeah but it’s nothing good. Just basic whistling.

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

Shut Eye

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

Purple, yellow, and red

(6) Relationship Status.

Taken by @sketchyskittles-png

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

51 Fahrenheit. OH MY GOD FAHRENHEIT FIFTY ONE– I’M…

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

It usually depends how much sleep I get, but not really, no.

(9) How Many Followers?

986

(10) Zodiac Sign.

Aries

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

Like a chocolate brown.

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

nah

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

Who doesn’t?

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

I haven’t touched a book in a while and i kind of feel bad. I wanna start reading something but idk what

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

I would but i’m really lazy and tired

(16) Favourite Anime?

My life

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

I don’t really remember. Maybe my mom?

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

I collect enamel pins

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

Texas de Brazil uwu

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

Only if I’m forced to

(21) Favourite Animal?

Cheetahs and Raccoons

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

Not really unless something interesting happens i guess

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

I don’t have a concept of time. It varies from moment to moment.

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

Nah mate

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Pool, but i don’t really like either but oh whale

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

The person reading this

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

Either is fine with me

(28) What Makes You Happy?

Friends

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

If there aren’t any words, then i can listen to music.

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

Why not both?

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

Purble

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

Playstation only because the controller is easier for my tiny hands to hold

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

I mean i would but i don’t want to

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

I wish I did.

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

Grey and blue

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

nah

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

Spend spend spend spend spend spe-

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Nope

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

Cookie run

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

nnnop

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

y,,,yea

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

I have!!! The weirdest dreams! I tend to use the dreams i have and make a story out of it though so i don’t hate it.

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

Sure, it’s aight

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part.

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Sunflower seeds

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Either Set it Off or P!ATD

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

I used to think i was but i’m really not

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

very.

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

I love thunder but i hate lightning

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

I love doing both

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

If i’m in a mood? absolutely.

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

I’ve never carved a pumpkin so idk

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Battle Symphony - Linkin Park

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Winter but like… almost spring

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now?

Tfufjkcing fucking tuna salad……

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

I’m lazy.

(58) What Is Your Gender?

Oh y’know…. [REDACTED]

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

Coffee

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

Nop

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

Oh y’know… [REDACTED] (pan)

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

rarely

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

MOTHER

FUCKING

CYNDAQUIL

(64) Favourite Social Media?

Discord ig

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

Don’t have one

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

yeahhhhh

(67) Are You A Virgin?

I don’t know, am I? (yes the answer is yes)

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Egg yolk

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

Probably my car unless the weather was bad

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

ye

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

Captain Marvel! I was supposed to see it saturday but we had to cancel.

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

My ex is one of my friends so like? I miss hanging out with them but I don’t really miss the relationship cause yknow… [redacted]

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

“I ate my grandma”

(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

Mmn…… light blue is pretty, or grey. But it doesn’t matter that much to me

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

Yes and yes. It’s the only good thing in life

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Chocolate cake

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

Cookie run and Bitlife

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

I mean i don’t really know how to professionally do CPR so idk

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

No! It’s only been like an hour. But yes i’ve been on for 5 hours at some point

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

yye

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

sure

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

No

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

closed

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

I went to a restaurant, i wrote some stuff, idk it was a slow day

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

Ssmmnonft oajamdas

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

My face

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

Im a night person babey

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

I can’t think of any right now but uhh…. Pokemone eevee, smash, and mario kart i know for sure

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

There was this dream when i was a kid about this guy who would kill you if he saw your breath by cutting your forehead off with a laser

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

Dr. pepper

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

Thunder storms

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

jeans

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

Tired

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

Sometimes complete silence and darkness

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

I want a tattoo of some type of heart, but that’s really all i know. Maybe i should do an actual heart… that would be cool.

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

Jacksepridceye