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softichill · 1 year ago

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The Sound of Nightmares unofficial transcript

(Sadly @queen0fm0nsterz wasn't able to work on this one, but is still important to credit bc I say so)

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

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[Click]

[Thunderstorm in the background]

OTTO: The guardian at the threshold. An archetype that parapsychologists have obsessed over for centuries. A mythic entity who’s appeared in the stories of innumerable cultures. No matter their description, his role is always the same: to confront anyone who dares cross into unseen worlds.

OTTO: In our last session, he spoke to her, or– through her. Even when I listen to the tape I can’t be certain what I’m hearing. Still, I’ve repeated his words like a sickness ever since. It went like this.

[Shifting]

OTTO: “Cross the sill. Sink in a twinkling. Cast aside the old sleep, to sleep again anew.”

[Otto puts the paper down]

OTTO: The Candleman, the Ferryman– indeed, the Guardian at the Threshold. An idolon on the inside, determined to [Hitting the table] Keep. Me. Out.

[Tape rewinding]

[Intro plays]

[Click]

[Shifting, electric humming, Otto putting something together]

OTTO: Noone was right after all. [Slow beeping starts] I noticed something off, while reviewing the E.E.G, and reluctantly, sent her up to radiology. At first I doubted the validity of the results, but the technician assured- curtly- that Noone’s scan undeniably shows… a pea-sized tumor, on the right-sided amygdala.

[clatter, humming continues]

OTTO: They maintain it’s benign, [click, more humming] despite the unusual ocular appearance.

[repeated clicking, Otto keeps building]

OTTO: This calls everything into question. The mass’s location could impact fear response, emotional salience, and damningly, dreams. And yet… I cannot deny all the evidence to the contrary.

[Lower click, Otto stops building]

OTTO: I’ve… pondered the ethics of informing Noone. She’s already so scared of her body that it would only send her spiraling. I can’t risk anything jeopardizing a revelation that might lead to Cici.

[Shift]

OTTO: From here on, anyone listening will think me mad. But, the proof is in the pudding! Noone’s… vanishings; her transpersonal states; they’re undeniable evidence of a realm- beyond our senses. It’s always been on the periphery, but now I know… it’s accessible. And she possesses the means to enter that domain.

[Papers rustling on the desk]

OTTO: My professor’s paper posits thus: “There are two requisites for entering the quiddity of consciousness. First, a gateway; places hidden amid our world. Second, a means to open these doors. And I assert that keys are primarily cut out of fear.”

[Otto places the paper down and lifts the device he was building. Humming becomes more clear, Otto sighs.]

OTTO: Either I lack his erudition, or his mania. My only hope lies in completing my labours. [Sigh, shifting on desk] I’ve not slept in weeks, [another sigh] and if I cannot dream as she does, I’ll never know how to enter- this… Nowhere.

[Click, audio cuts]

[Audio starts]

[Thunder in the background]

OTTO: [in the background] An ugly autumn night, isn’t it Noone? Swirling mist, they called it on the broadcast. A weather phenomenon unique to the Counties- a downpour’s not far off. But- a gift, may brighten the mood.

[Otto gets closer to the recorder]

OTTO: Here.

[Otto slides something over to Noone]

NOONE: O-oh. It’s nearly the same. Red, too.

OTTO: A chrysanthemum, like your parents left you all those weeks ago! An apology, a- a reminder that I remain as committed to you as I did then.

NOONE: Pretty.

OTTO: It’s a perennial, so it’ll blossom year after year, just like you!

[Shifting as they both sit down]

NOONE: I think, I’m ready now. To talk about… m-my Mum and Dad.

OTTO: (surprised) Oh. And why now? What’s changed?

NOONE: Because… I feel like I’m beginning to forget. And maybe talking will help me remember.

OTTO: Because you’ve been away so long, or you literally feel you’re losing your memory?

NOONE: Um… more like I’m losing a part of me. I can’t tell, am I the girl here, or- the one there?

OTTO: (slightly amused) They’re one in the same. Given all you’ve told me, they must be. It’s not you that’s different, but the physical space around that y-

NOONE: I said I want to talk about my mum and dad! When most kids have nightmares, or- whatever these are, they go to their parents to feel better. Here, I relive them again and again. And it’s all you want to talk about, because you think you can find Cici! Through me!

OTTO: Noone. The only way to find answers is to discover where you go when you sleep. Talking about your parents would be wasting the hours!

NOONE: Aren’t these sessions supposed to be about me?!

OTTO: Always.

NOONE: But I have no say. No control. Over how I feel, or- what I do, I don’t even belong to myself!

[Pause]

NOONE: I’ll do as you ask, but promise me. (Quiet) No wires hooked into my head. No machines. Not tonight.

OTTO: No machines, promise. [Getting up] I think you’ll enjoy what I’ve got planned.

[Audio cuts]

[Door opens]

OTTO: This bed was for shiftwork*. Now I sleep here more days than not.

NOONE: Oh. Pretty.

[Door closes]

[Steps on carpet, recorder set down]

OTTO: I’d like to try a sort of role-reversal. [Creak] I’ll lie here, blindfolded, depriving my senses, to enter a self-induced hypnogogia, so I can focus on your words. You’ll recount your latest visit, and I want you to try as hard as you can, to project your dream into my head.

NOONE: I don’t think it can work, but… I’ll try.

[Creak, shifting as Otto lays down]

NOONE: That girl. In the photo there. That’s her, your daughter.

OTTO: My sister.

NOONE: O-Oh. You don’t look much alike.

[Otto getting prepared]

OTTO: [Exhale] I’m- I-I’m settled. Blindfold on… Carry me away with you, Noone.

NOONE, narrating: …I couldn’t see anything-

OTTO: S-Slow down. This is vital. Speak, as if you’re trying to pull me in.

NOONE: …

NOONE, narrating: I floated through a darkness, with nothing at my feet. Then it all faded and, I was somewhere new.

NOONE: An underground brick tunnel, with a stream of… thick sludge passing through a canal at its center.

NOONE: I can still hear it. Jangling keys. [Dream ambience starts] Screaking metal. Do you hear, Otto?

OTTO: I… I can’t. But keep trying.

NOONE: It came from… a kid in the distance, struggling to shut a ground-iron door. The last thing I heard before the slamming shut was… laughter. [Echoey laughter, faint slam]

[Running water]

NOONE: Sludge poured in from the pipes that ran along the tunnel walls. I had no choice but to follow the stream and, so I did until I reached a section [Distant kids chatting] where I saw storm drains above.

[Dripping water, kids sound more intense]

NOONE: Looking up through one, I saw a boy’s dirty boots, and orange light shining, from a lantern on his waist. We locked eyes and he called out,

BOY, overlapping with NOONE: “Look! Critters already!”

[Children laughing]

NOONE: Lights then shone down from… every drain above. Other boys and girls wanting to peek at me.

[Children laughing, Dream!Noone quietly starting to breathe hard]

NOONE: Very suddenly, [laughter dies down] they went quiet. [Kids start whispering] I didn’t know why, until… I heard it. A rumbling through the tunnels.

[Kids whisper things like “It’s here!” “It’s finally here!”]

NOONE: They whispered together. “It’s here! Finally here!”

[Whispering dies down, rumbling]

NOONE: Do you feel what I felt, Otto?

OTTO: They’d… been waiting. For you.

NOONE: …Not exactly. Their joy, their bratty excitement… they’d- gathered for an event, and it had finally come. Like a holiday, that only arrives once per year.

NOONE: Running from their celebration, I turned down a tunnel, [wet footsteps] going until, I came to a junction. Overwhelmed by how many options surrounded me, I closed my eyes. Listening.

[Running water, squeaky metal detector sounds]

NOONE: The sound… came from the path to my left. [Faint electronic buzzing] I waited, watching from a distance, as someone crossed [squeaking] by the dark tunnel mouth.

NOONE: He carried… a strange gadget. And every now and again, its buzz, turned to some- beeping. Detecting secrets, in the waters.

[Metal detector squeaking]

NOONE: I hardly noticed the rest of him. But, I got a look before he crossed out of view. He carried a heavy sack, over his shoulder. And things squirmed inside. But, he was gone as quick as he’d appeared!

[Metal detector gets quieter, Dream!Noone’s wet steps]

NOONE: The sludge was… rising quickly [Dream!Noone: Ugh!], up to my ankles, and- the stink became so awful, Otto! I-Imagine it, waste filling your nose.

[Wet steps continue]

NOONE: Then, across from me, a small pipe became blocked, stopping the sewage. A grey mass poked through [Nome chittering], jammed in tight, wiggling to get loose. But… not until it fell into the sludge [plop], did I realize this… tiny… [chittering] thing… was alive! It picked itself up and- swayed about, curious of my company.

[Wet steps combined with Nome sounds. Nome makes noises through the next paragraph]

NOONE: The head was… was shaped like- those cone mushrooms, that grow out in Haitfield**. I inched closer to the little mushroom fairy, and… it began mimicking me! As if we’d been old friends!

OTTO: (distant) A friendly presence… the first non-hostile being you’ve met that wasn’t another child.

NOONE: Yes! He belonged there. In that world. Part of it rather than… a stranger, like me.

NOONE: Is… is it working, Otto? Can you see its little mushroom head?

OTTO: I think so. Maybe. Keep going.

NOONE: [mimicking a deep voice] Yes. Drift away, Otto. Drift away…

[Wet steps, Nome noises]

NOONE: A crooked net lowered down from a drain grate above. While I ducked to cover, the mushroom fairy didn’t. I tried to point upward but, it simply copied my gesture! There was a girl [little girl giggling] giggling with- ugly delight, sticking her whole arm through the grate, hoping to capture the poor thing! So I grabbed a loose brick, [lifting brick] and threw it at her! [Dream!Noone: Hup!]

NOONE: Hitting her arm [girl wailing] she cried out, while I picked up the mushroom fairy, [running through sludge] and ran off.

[Dream!Noone panting, running]

NOONE: After we were well clear, I put the creature down. [Nome chatters] It immediately walked off! Then, looked back, suggesting I follow.

NOONE: [walking] That little body clicked, jittery and… ungraceful. Somehow the thing seemed to know where it was taking me, stopping only once we came to a rusty door [metal creaking], leading to a maintenance room.

NOONE: Entering though, I discovered something else entirely. [Squeaky door opening, Dream!Noone gasps and whispers “Wow”] Endless piles spread about the room, some of pure junk while… others housed gold jewelry! As long as it could be collected, there was a place for it here. [Dream!Noone walking through the room] Mesmerizing.

[Walking]

NOONE: Only after examining a mound of keys [key jingling] did I understand, where this stuff came from. Everything in this room, had been dropped down from the world above over the years. [Nome noise(?)] The only thing out of place, was a child’s propeller cap. On a chair, tucked away, forgotten. [Nome chitter] I think that’s what the mushroom fairy wanted me to see.

NOONE: [Nome perks up] As if on cue, I heard the man approaching; the little creature hid in a pile of mismatched mittens, and I jammed my way in too. [Running, fabric shuffling, metal door opens and electric buzz + squeaking starts]

NOONE: I peered out, as he stepped through the door and began dumping out his… pockets. [Faint clattering of various things] Coins, rings, trinkets… [Clattering stops] Next, he took off his plastic suit, covered in- gunk. Beneath, was a bony body, his spine bent horribly. What I thought had been a sack carried over his shoulder… was the back of his head. Like a balloon full of water, throbbing and- swollen.

NOONE: But I could tell he was not always that way. He’d changed. Somehow become one… with the sewers.

OTTO: (more distant) I don’t understand. You believe this place transformed him?

NOONE: Aren’t you meant to be drifting into hypergocklia, or whatever? Seeing, smelling, hearing as I did?

OTTO: I can’t seem… to let go. I want to, more than anything I-

NOONE: [Imitating Otto] Try! That’s what you always tell me. If I’m trying my hardest, you have to as well.

NOONE, narrating: From the corner of my eye, I noticed the little cone sneaking away. The balloon-headed man was inches away, and in that moment, I thought of Jester. Of the Child with Gooey Hair. Of Rusty. I couldn’t do nothing, not again!

NOONE: Thankfully, [rumbling, clattering] that rumbling from earlier returned in that moment, stronger than before!

[Sewer Man notices and panics]

NOONE: The shaking destroyed the man’s piles, startling him into… an odd anger, so… I stumbled out from hiding, [Running] and bolted for my mushroom fairy, [Nome] and out the door! [Metal creak, Sewer Man notices]

NOONE: I ran and ran, and, [Dream!Noone running and panting] although the man, he wasn’t very fast, that didn’t matter. [Buzzing & squeaking] He had his gadget, and, that buzz followed wherever I went!

[Dream!Noone wading through water]

NOONE: Any sense of direction washed away with- the sludge that was now up to my knees! [Dream!Noone running & panting] Turning down tunnel after tunnel, I stopped, [ambience calms down, squeaking] hoping I’d lost him.

NOONE: All at once, those lanterns shone from above [clicks]. The naughty kids had spotted us! [Kids start singing a teasing song] Wildly they sang, “Snatch a gift! Snatch a gift! Before they’re all sent adrift!”

[Kids continue singing and start clapping along, ambience picks up]

NOONE: Their cheers grew and, [squeak, Dream!Noone gasps] and I saw why. [Electric buzzing] A bag-headed shadow appeared at the tunnel’s far end. Cutting me off. The man and his machine used the tunnels as if- as if the sewers had leaked into his thoughts!

[Dream!Noone breathing hard, splashing water]

NOONE: I tried to backtrack, but, must have taken a wrong turn, and found myself at a dead end. A wall of bricks! [Nome struggles] The mushroom fairy squirmed hard, begging to be freed! So… [plop] I let go, and the grey cone climbed up a pile of fallen rubble, and slipped through a crack, without hesitation, to abandon me! (Sad) Despite saving its life.

[Water leaking]

NOONE: The crack the fairy squeezed through began spouting water from the other side. [Squeaking and buzzing start up again] I pulled at the bricks as the man stepped closer [Sewer Man gets closer, bricks shifting], one brick loose, then another. His gadget buzzed and buzzed, when I ripped a final brick loose, [Sewer Man sees Noone] leaving a hole large enough to creep through.

[Sewer Man yells and hits the wall, buzzing and squeaking get farther away]

NOONE: He bated at the wall, grabbing at me, but, I was too far gone. His small, milky eye peeked through at me, until the walls rumbled, more fiercely than ever! The man backed away, overcome with horror.

[Sewer Man yells, echoey kids’ cheers in the background]

NOONE: The rumbling didn’t stop after that. And neither did the kids cheering from above. [Ambience rising] Whatever they had waited for…

[All ambience stops]

NOONE: It was time.

[Wind/thunder in the background, back in the office]

NOONE: Otto, you’re awake! [Otto startles]

OTTO: Yes, Noone. I’m trying, so hard, to see, to feel- to sense what you did, but I can’t. I don’t have the gift you have, and your gifts are not as commanding as I hoped they’d-

NOONE: (Upset/frustrated) I’d trade places with you in a heartbeat! I wish I could give you everything in my head, then I’d be rid of all of this.

[pause]

NOONE: Shall I go on?

OTTO: Yes.

NOONE, narrating: …It felt as if someone had picked up the sewer, shaking it with rage. Water crashed against the walls. I stumbled on and on, the tunnel growing wider and wider… A second smaller sound appeared; [distant nome chitters] clicks, and murmurs. Then, [nomes getting louder] out of the darkness ahead, they appeared, [many nomes running] scurrying so fast I couldn’t react! A hundred little mushroom fairies, rushing past me in a panic, escaping something close behind!

[Distant kids teasing]

NOONE: It wasn’t long before that something came. [Rushing water, kids cheering] speeding like [Dream!Noone gasps] a pack of horses tangled together, a tidal wave pounded through the sewer!

[Dream!Noone yelps, wave approaches]

NOONE: The wave was feet away when, [Wave is extremely close, ambience pauses minus the kids cheering] I finally understood. For the kids above, this was a blast. They waited and waited, unable to experience the wave’s power themselves, and that made them love it all the more. Snatching things that run from its path was part of their awful celebration.

[Waves crashes down on Dream!Noone]

NOONE: The violent wave hit, sweeping me away, carrying me back through the maze of tunnels. I swam up and up, doing my best to surface, and just as I did,

[Splash, music suddenly calms. Dream!Noone gasping for air]

NOONE: The waves paused. My body no longer needed to swim. And the Candleman appeared, floating… on some kind of… broken door.

OTTO: (distant, serious) Go through your encounter diligently. He holds the answers I- we need. Make no mistake: he is your tormentor.

NOONE: (darkly) ‘m not sure that’s true.

NOONE, narrating: This time, I was able to speak in his presence.

Overlapping with Dream!Noone: “Why do you bring me here? What do you want?!”

NOONE: He replied,

FERRYMAN, ov. with NOONE: “Cross the sill. Sink in a twinkling. Cast aside the old sleep, to sleep again anew.”

NOONE: I yelled back (dream!Noone) “Why?! Why should I?!!” Before I finished he said,

FERRYMAN: “Blight. Not within, but without. Here, all banes be set free.”

OTTO: More riddles. He doesn’t think I can solve them, but I will-

NOONE: I already did. I think… he means by giving myself to his world, I won’t be ill any longer. That’s why… when I’m there, no more headaches. No more parasites. No more tests.

OTTO: That’s not true, it’s not!

NOONE: [interrupting] I would almost prefer him to take me.

OTTO: [Standing up] Don’t say that!

NOONE: Away from here. From yo–

OTTO: It’s what he wants!

NOONE: Maybe–

OTTO: He wants you!

NOONE: (yelling) Maybe your Cici felt that way too! Relieved!

OTTO: [Angry shock, deep breaths]

[Walking, door opens]

OTTO: (whispering) No… (mumbling) I was only a boy…

[Wind picks up slightly in the background]

[Door creaks, click, audio cuts]

[Click, tape rewinding, click]

[Audio starts, storm continues in the background]

[Papers shifting. Door opens]

OTTO: We’re done tonight. Get out. To your room, go.

[Papers rustling]

NOONE: (accusatory) What’s this?

OTTO: Nosing through my desk, were you?

NOONE: My name’s on it. It’s my scan, yes?

OTTO: Smart girl.

NOONE: Wh… what does it tell?

OTTO: That you’ve got a mass. Growing on your brain- a tumor.

NOONE: I knew it. The cure. …How bad is-

OTTO: A mass in your brain is never good.

[Faint thunder]

NOONE: (about to cry) You should have told me. Why? Why didn’t you tell me?

OTTO: It’s not my practice to tell before necessary. Now, get. To. Bed.

NOONE: …Fine. [Sniff]

[Storm continues]

NOONE, narrating: But after the Candleman spoke, the wave carried me by the maintenance room again. The Bag-Headed man looked through a window, terrified. He was– opposite to those kids above. Living down there, he– he’d no reason to celebrate the wave. Instead… he cherished what they dropped down by accident.

NOONE: You see… each wanted what the other had. But could never have themselves.

NOONE: I’m taking two sweets tonight. [Ceramic chime, wrappers]

OTTO: Take as many as you want and leave.

[Ceramic click, audio cuts]

[Audio starts]

[The storm is louder now]

OTTO: [Sigh]...

OTTO: Perhaps I was cruel to tell her. But as she sleeps, I’ve been pondering the entry requisites specified by my professor. I believe he was only partly right. One need only to look at the theater of agony that the Ferryman’s created to understand fear, is an essential requirement. [threatening ambience starts] And I know better than anyone, a little fear can compel us towards discovery.

OTTO: As for the gateway’s location, perhaps it’s not a place hidden in our world, but in our minds. Is it not possible that her tumor is somehow this unknown gateway? An organ of transcendence.

OTTO: The apparatus may be unfinished, but its [unintelligible]*** monitor is functional. If she’s to cross over, in a “twinkling”, what choice do I have? In her words, you must try.

[Click, audio cuts]

[Audio starts. A machine is running and Otto is typing something.]

OTTO: She hardly stirred at all while I pathed the BCI.

[Beep, Otto stops typing. Something whirrs]

OTTO: All seems stable. As soon as her dreaming begins, the monitor should translate neurosignals into visualizations.

NOONE: (half-asleep) Otto…

OTTO: Shhh, shsh…

NOONE: [Mumbling, starting to become distressed]

OTTO: Shhh. Return to that sleep of yours.

[Audio cuts]

[Audio starts. Machine is still going, storm is outside]

OTTO: It’s past midnight. She fought as long as she could, but finally succumbed. This is it. Show me, Noone. Show me the other side.

[Noone mumbles, monitor turns on]

OTTO: Here we are. The image… a… kaleidoscope of black…

[Noone winces]

OTTO: An unnatural abyss…

[Noone winces repeatedly]

OTTO: Wait- a shape. It’s difficult to see… [Noone] like looking through a negative mist.

[Noone continues making noises of distress. Otto spots something]

OTTO: There! A silhouette! Ovular, splitting across the center–

[Static rises and Otto yells in pain. Ambience is loud]

OTTO: [Strained] It– it glares like the sun– [choking] No! A pupil! Near white! Oh god, it’s– it’s watching me! It’s watching me!

[Noone nearly yells in her sleep]

[Whoosh, Otto yells, machine shuts off. Audio is muddled for a moment.]

OTTO: (very muffled) [Breathing heavily] Noone? [Gasp] Noone!

[Crashing, audio cuts]

[Outro plays]

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*I'm not super sure of what he says here since the door drowns him out

**I don't know how this is spelled

***According to text-to-speech, google, and autocorrect, what he says here is not a real word and I have no idea what it could be. All I know is that it ends in -graph.

#little nightmares #ln #the sounds of nightmares #tson #transcript #the sounds of nightmares transcript #noone #otto #the ferryman #ln noone #noone ln #ln otto #Otto ln #ln ferryman #I'M SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE AAAAA life got busy for both of us........#But hey at least it's here before the final episode!!!!#Anyways what if I exploded Otto with my mind. To shreds you say

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xiubaek-13 · 10 months ago

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Chapter 47 - Do It Together

Requested: No

Genre: Canon-AU, smut

Pairing: ? (at this stage undecided) x Reader or is it Baekhyun x Reader ?

Warnings: 18+ fic, minors DNI! Smut, power play, pet names, dom/sub dynamics (if you squint), oral (m & f receiving), threesome mfm, unprotected sex (don't be like them), overstimulation, restraint, vaginal fingering, face fucking, vaginal sex, creampie, masturbation (m), dirty talk, like the entire chapter is smut ok? You've been warned.

Word Count: 10,350

A/N: Oh boy, ok so this took some time but also, these are my two EXO biases so writing this put me through it. There is only one chapter left after this and then this story will finally come to a close. It's been a labour of love (and took many more years to complete than I ever anticipated) and I'm thankful to each and every one of you who read and interact with this.

“Ok but like, if he comes back are we really doing this?” Baekhyun asked as soon as Minseok had left the room.

“Only if we all agree to the terms of the reward and are willing. He likes to be in charge so I dare say he’ll have rules about what you can and cannot do. So if you aren’t ok with being instructed by Xiumin then probably mention it sooner rather than later.” You replied. You paused for a moment then added. “I cannot tell you how nervous he has been to bring it up with you Baek. He was so certain that you would laugh and reject him. So like, let him down easy if you don’t want to do this.” The last thing you wanted was for him to come back only for Baek to change his mind. Minseok would be so embarrassed.

He shook his head and moved his chair closer to yours. “No, like I said, I’m completely down for this and I don’t mind if I’m in charge or if someone else is when sex is concerned.”

“So versatile.” You smirked.

“You love it.” He winked.

“Actually, I don’t think I’ve experienced you not being in charge like that.” You let your mind drift as you imagined the different possibilities. Would Xiumin lay down a few generalised rules or would he direct the whole experience? Would he make Baek watch? Would he watch you and Baek?

Baekhyun hummed in response, obviously also letting his imagination run wild with the opportunities this night might bring.

You laughed as you caught him lost in thought. “I can always leave if you want him to yourself Baek.”

Baekhyun raised a brow at you before smirking. “If that was something I was down for, why do I feel like you’d want to watch?” You blushed at the thought.

“Moving on.” You murmured. Why was your face so warm?

Your embarrassment was not missed by Baek. “Oh we are most definitely discussing that later.” He grinned.

“I said moving on.” You repeated. That wasn’t something you were going to unpack right now but there was no denying that the image in your brain was anything other than hot.

“Mmmhmm, for now.” He agreed. Baekhyun’s face took on an inquisitive expression as he asked. “Did he have someone else in mind or was I really his first choice for this?”

You nodded. “As far as he told me, which stretches back to before these lessons began, you were his choice.” The man across from you preened at this. “Don’t let it go to your head Baek.”

He smiled softly. “Bit hard not to, if I'm being honest.” Byun Baekhyun sounded genuinely flattered. For all of his bravado and confidence in all other areas of his life somehow Minseok choosing him made him coy? He then added. “I don’t know who I thought he’d pick, but I wasn’t expecting to be his first choice for something like this.”

You levelled your gaze at him. “You are literally the mood maker of the group. He trusts you to listen to him when he’s serious about something but also to keep any situation light hearted and not let things get awkward.” You paused, then shrugged. “If you think about it, you’re kind of the perfect choice for this.”

His small smile started to turn smug. “So many compliments for me in such a short time. You should stop feeding my ego noona.” He leant forward so his lips could brush your ear. “Especially after our earlier conversation.” You felt his hand glide over your waist, sending a shiver through your body. You were so responsive and ready for the night to proceed, certain that you’d fall apart quickly for them. “Whilst that particular activity was a very pleasant surprise - and came with a happy ending - I can’t honestly say I’m completely satisfied. I got to hear all the pretty noises you make for me but I didn’t get to touch you.” His hand gripped your waist as he spoke, his thumb rubbing small circles, the motion coupled with his words caused your breath to shudder.

“So many things I want to do to you noona,” Baekhyun leaned down, his soft lips peppering kisses on your shoulder, working his way up your neck. “I don’t know what I want more, to fuck you and have him watch.” His teeth grazed over your collarbone, sending even more shivers as you gasped aloud this time. “To watch him fuck you.” You felt him smile against your skin as he let out a soft chuckle as your body betrayed you with another shudder before he continued his path and kissed up your neck, “Or both of us take you at the same time, until you’re so fucked out you can’t form a single.” to your chin, “coherent.” then to your jaw. “thought.” He brought your face to his, locking your lips together in a searing, hunger filled kiss. Your hands moved to cup his cheeks as his grip on your waist pulled you closer towards him.

“Baek,” You murmured through the haze of lust that was threatening to take over your senses. You were barely keeping your desire restrained and Baekhyun’s lips on your body and the words coming out of his mouth were in no way helping ground you for what was to come. You also didn’t want the first thing for Xiumin to see when he returned was that the two of you didn’t even wait for him before you got started. You could see the look of disapproval he’d give you and it was enough to break through the sinful feeling of Baekhyun’s lips and wandering hands on you. You pushed him with just enough force to separate yourself from him. “We need to wait. This is his reward, we can’t ruin it for him.”

He pouted at you, almost sulking. “Well hyung needs to hurry the fuck up then, because I want more of you.”

You laughed softly. “Did you or did you not say less than ten minutes ago that you were good at taking direction? You’re sounding like a real brat right now.”

“Shut up. I’m horny. My brain is like 85% not in use right now okay?” He made a point of shoving his hands under his thighs, basically sitting on them, in order to stop himself from reaching out to touch you.

You weren’t faring much better, holding on to your self control by tattered threads. You needed Xiumin to come back and take control of this whole situation before Baekhyun and you could no longer resist the temptation. “Yeah, well you aren’t the only horny one Baek.” You sighed. “But we need to control ourselves. You have no idea how nervous he’s been about discussing this. Without me slipping up I don’t know if he’d ever have actually discussed it with you.”

Baekhyun took a few deep breaths as he tried his best to put his lust in check and wait. He knew you were right, and that he also wanted this reward to be everything Minseok hoped it would be. He didn’t have to be happy about waiting though. “Fine,” he conceded at last. “We wait.”

Thankfully neither of you would have to wait much longer.

***

You could feel the shift in the air when he returned to the room. Minseok had taken time to calm himself, and you assumed, mentally prepared himself for the role he was about to play. The switch into his more dominant side was always fascinating to you. It was always there but when he turned it towards the bedroom it was just so damn sexy. The others got to see him tap into a sexy persona during choreo and take charge in certain situations but most of the time he was just their cute, nagging hyung.

Sure, they’d all shared a living space for many years and had no doubt seen and heard everything more times than they wanted to count. There was no one who could convince you that if you placed a group of guys in their late teens to early twenties together that they were never caught masturbating or having sex by any of the others. But actively including one of those guys in your own sexual experiences? Now that was something you were less sure they had done - and if any had, clearly the two men you were currently with had not been involved. Regardless, it was happening tonight and you had a front row seat, or rather, you were on the stage with them, a very active and willing participant.

Xiumin walked towards the two of you but didn't take a seat. Instead he picked up one of the arm chairs and moved it so that it was facing the end of the bed, then pushed it to the left until he was satisfied with the off centre view of the bed whoever sat in it would have. The new angle would definitely provide a better view of whatever happened on the bed. So he wanted someone to watch? He turned to face the two of you, motioning for you to move towards the bed. “Noona, please take a seat.” He gestured to the armchair, so you did as you were told and took a seat. He took a seat at the end of the bed, tapping the spot next to him for Baekhyun to follow suit.

Once Baekhyun was also seated he began to speak. Gone was the nervous wreck that was Minseok, replaced by the very self assured, confident and in control Xiumin who was ready to receive his reward. “Before we begin we need to go over some ground rules.” Both Baek and you nodded in agreement causing Xiu to chuckle. “Firstly, words are required. If you are asked a question, want something or are spoken to, I expect it to be conveyed verbally.” He paused as he waited for the two of you to realise that he was waiting for confirmation that you each understood him.

“Got it.” Baek replied. “Uh, do I have to call you anything in particular? Or can I stick with hyung?” He asked.

“Hyung or a variation of Xiumin is fine for you to use Baek.” He replied. His eyes turned to you. “You, however, will refer to me as Xiumin, Xiu or Sir tonight. Am I clear?”

Instinctively you began to nod, catching yourself when he raised a brow at you. “Very clear Xiumin.” You replied, doing your best to mask the desire that was building in you again. You and Minseok had engaged in power play on more than one occasion, but most of the time it was simply him taking control as you lost yourself to pleasure. Xiumin was going to control what all of you got to experience tonight, and you could tell that if you didn’t do as you were told then you weren’t getting any relief. Your thighs rubbed together in anticipation.

“Secondly, we need to discuss how this will play out, everyone’s limits and a safe word.” He looked at each of you and smiled softly. “I think we start with each of your limits.”

Baekhyun smiled and gestured for you to go first. “Ok, well I guess as far as my own limits go, I don’t like extreme pain. Light stuff like restraints and spanking is fine but actual pain crosses the line for me. Uh, I’m also not ok with any bodily fluids that aren’t cum or saliva. Oh, and I’m not a fan of anal. I think that’s all?” There were probably more but as far as ones that might come into play tonight, those were all you could think of.

Xiumin nodded. “Pity about the last one, but noted. Baek, what about you?”

Baek shrugged. “Uh honestly? Apart from the same bodily fluids thing as noona, I don’t think I have any. I will let you know if I’m not ok with anything as it happens - though I kind of doubt that I’ll have to.”

You thought of one almost immediately and cocked your head as you spoke. “You don’t like degradation.”

He nodded. “Oh yeah, I don’t like it, it’s not a hard limit for me but praise is far more effective for me.” He thought hard for a few more moments before deciding that no, there were no other limits he thought needed mentioning. “What about you hyung?”

Xiumin didn’t miss a beat. “I have a few but I think the only relevant ones for tonight are degradation and causing actual pain. If I hurt either of you, you need to tell me immediately. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I caused you pain without any pleasure. I like to play rough but not at the expense of the other person, or in this case, people’s enjoyment.” He sighed. “But essentially, that’s all for me.” He looked at each of you earnestly as he summarised. “Ok so no inflicting pain, no degradation and no anal for noona. All of that should be easy enough to work around.”

Baekhyun raised his hand. You choked back a laugh as Xiumin raised one brow at him. “Yes Baek?”

“I still have questions.” He said.

“Of course you do.” Xiumin sighed. “Go ahead and ask then.” Baekhyun’s eyes lit up but before he could utter a word Xiumin added on with some exasperation. “Don’t make me regret this.”

Baek shook his head. “It’s nothing strange, just how will this work? Are we going with the flow or are you telling us what to do? If you’re telling us what to do, can we also make suggestions? Are we fucking her at the same time, one after the other, is there anything that’s off the table for you? Is -” He stopped speaking when Xiumin held up a hand.

“Ok that’s all the questions you get to ask. What was that, seven in like 5 seconds? I was getting to all of this you impatient fuck.” He shook his head, trust Baek to always find a way to test his patience. “To answer pretty much all of it, I like being in control so I’ll tell you what to do in a broad sense, and you’ll do that until I give further instructions. You can make suggestions but I reserve the right to deny said requests.” Baek nodded, remembering at the last second to verbalise his understanding. Xiumin acknowledged him then turned his head and locked eyes with you. “Any questions before we begin?”

“No.” You replied.

He stared at you, as if he was waiting for you to say something else, but for the life of you, you couldn’t think of what that was. He shook his head ever so slightly then spoke. “No?”

You paused. You’d forgotten something, but what was it? He wanted you to speak in response to him rather than rely on non verbal cues. You’d done that, so what else was there? You could feel his eyes on you as he waited for you to reply again. You glanced at Baek, hoping he would provide insight into what you’d missed but all he did was give you a little salute. Weird. Why would he be saluting you? There was no context for that, and even as strange as his gestures could be at times, they always fitted in contextually with what was going on. Oh. OH. You realised 5 seconds later than it should have taken you to. Xiumin told you to refer to him in specific ways tonight. You returned your eyes to his expectant gaze. “No sir.”

It seemed to do the trick, as you saw him let out a breath that you weren’t aware he’d been holding. “That’s more like it.” He licked his lips, his eyes flitting between yours and your lips. The desire he was holding back was evident, but as the three of you stood on the precipice of beginning this thing, you could see the fire building in him. This was his fantasy, and he was about to make it a reality. After months and months of build up, and weeks of him fearing he’d be rejected for even suggesting it, it was happening, he just had to take the final step over the precipice and set everything in motion. You couldn’t help but smile at him as you waited for him to give the first instruction, knowing he was having one final internal debate about the entire thing, and probably on some level fretting about the cleanup afterwards.

You didn’t want to be disobedient but if he took too long to get things going you weren’t sure you’d be able to stop yourself from throwing yourself at him. It had been too long since you’d felt his lips on yours. He took a deep breath, squared his shoulders and took the leap. “Baek, I want you to move up to the other end of the bed and sit against the headboard.”

“Ok hyung.” He replied eagerly. “Clothes on or off at this stage?”

“Leave them on for now.” He replied. Baek obeyed, pushed himself to the other end of the bed and leant against the headboard as instructed. He looked comfortable, but the desire in his eyes told you he was desperate to touch you, or himself. He spread his legs and smirked at you, your joke about his manspreading replaying in your mind. You failed to keep the small laugh in. Xiumin looked at you then at Baek and sighed. “What?” He asked.

A look of apprehension appeared on his face and you wanted to squash any growing doubts immediately. Of course you laughed at the worst time, right as he decided to start his rewards. Naturally he now thought the two of you were mocking him, which was absolutely not the case. “I once made an observation about Baek’s chronic manspreading. His reply was that there was a lot of room for activities between his thighs.” You explained. Relief and annoyance flooded him.

Baek scoffed. “That particular observation was made via text, in a room full of staff and you guys on the day of a concert.”

Xiumin sighed to himself. “Oh my god, you are both such brats.” He reached forward and grabbed your hand gently, tugging you toward the bed. “Baby, go sit between his legs, with your back facing him.”

You placed a chaste kiss on his hand as you stood. “Can I offer a suggestion hyung?” Baek asked as you moved on the bed towards him.

“Go ahead.” He replied.

You felt Baek’s chest against your back as you leant back against him. “She should place her legs over mine, leaving you sufficient room,” He smirked. “For activities.”

Xiumin shook his head as a laugh escaped him. “You know what, terrible joke aside, that’s a good idea.” He nodded at you. “Baby, do as Baek suggested.” You couldn’t help the blush as you did as you were told. You felt exposed, even though you were still fully clothed. Xiumin sat back and looked at the two of you, taking in the sight before him, his eyes practically shining as he did so. Baek hadn’t touched you since Xiumin had entered the room. He was behaving and doing as he was told, a rare sight to behold. His eyes travelled down your body, satisfied with how you were spread open for him, unable to close your legs when he got closer.

Xiumin swallowed thickly as he crawled up the bed towards the two of you. He made his way into the space left for him between your legs. Once there he hooked a finger under your chin as he guided your face closer to his. He absentmindedly parted his lips the closer you got to him. You licked yours in response. You heard Baek suck in a breath when Xiumin leaned in, capturing your lips in a soft but sure kiss. You felt your body relax at the familiar feeling of his lips on yours. You sighed into it, your hands moving up to cup behind Xiumin’s neck and pull him forward, closer to you. He allowed you to control the kiss for a moment before pushing you as far back as he could without losing his balance. You could feel Baekhyun breathing erratically behind you, unable to do anything but watch as you and Xiumin made out. The kiss had started soft as the two of you got reacquainted with each other but it was rapidly growing more passionate as your tongues collided with each other.

“Fuck.” You heard Baek murmur from behind you. You felt an unmistakable hardness forming against the small of your back as the kiss grew more heated. You moaned into Xiumin’s mouth as he pulled your bottom lip between his teeth and bit. He pulled back to survey his work, taking in your dilated pupils and flushed face.

“That gone after one kiss?” He remarked, though not entirely faring much better himself. “How wrecked are you going to look after Baek has his turn?” You tried to respond but all of the pent up desire from the day chose to flood your system. All you could feel was your desire for each of them and the fact that at that exact moment, no one was touching you. A whimper escaped you, making Xiumin chuckle. “You want Baek to kiss you baby?”

“Please.” You sounded far more desperate than you wanted to, but you needed it. It was difficult to describe the feelings you were experiencing but the overwhelming desire was clouding everything in its path. Logic and reason were locked away for the night, and you were going to indulge in Xiumin’s fantasy and love every moment of it. As long as someone touched you, right away. Otherwise you felt like you might implode. “Xiu please,”

“Go on Baek, give her what she wants.” He instructed, his eyes never leaving yours. Baek didn’t need to be told twice. You felt the soft press of his lips on your neck which made your eyes flutter as you gasped. You felt Baek smile against your skin as he continued peppering kisses along your neck and jaw before his hand turned your face towards his so he could capture your lips in a searing kiss. His other hand held you firmly against him as the two of you made out. Xiumin took advantage of your neck being bared to him and, not to be outdone by Baek, began peppering it with kisses. You let out a soft moan, and it was as if the tension in the room snapped, taking everyone’s restraint with it. You felt Baekhyun pressing against you as his body sought out any friction he could get, at the same time Xiumin’s soft kisses to your neck became deeper. Every time you felt the scrape of his teeth on your neck you moaned, each one louder than the last.

Baekhyun noticed what his hyung was doing and took the opportunity to short circuit your brain by doing the exact same thing as Xiumin was. The feeling of having your neck ravished by both men was making you light headed. You were pretty sure that Baek was leaving marks all over the expanse of your neck. The previous marks he’d left had only just faded, not that you cared one bit in that moment. It was nothing an oversized scarf and hoodie couldn’t cover.

Both men managed to detach themselves from you long enough for Xiumin to utter “Help me strip her.” Baek removed all the clothing on your upper body while he removed your pants, leaving you in just your panties while they were still fully clothed.

Xiumin scowled at the dark hickey on your hip - the one that had yet to fade, asking who left that mark on you. “That would be me hyung.” Baek replied, “I couldn’t help myself.” He shrugged. He might not have noticed the way Xiumin’s jaw clenched as he stared at the mark, but you sure had, even through the haze of lust clouding your mind. He wasn’t the jealous type but something about them was making him tense. It was on your hip, hidden by clothing but for anyone who got you undressed enough to see it, it was left as a clear reminder of who had been there before them. Of who had claimed you as theirs.

You moved your hand up to cup his jaw softly. His sharp eyes, darkened with lust and something else, something carnal, lifted to yours, and stared at you. “Xiumin, are you jealous that he left marks there?” His gaze swirled with something dangerous, but not dangerous enough to deter you.

“Careful.” He murmured. His piercing gaze made you feel like prey about to be devoured. Something you were absolutely not against. You steeled your resolve, wanting to make him let loose like you knew he could. If you pushed him just the right amount, he’d forget every insecurity he had about this reward and lose himself to dominating everyone's pleasure. You’d never regretted it in the past so you figured giving him that little push now would result in you getting fucked within an inch of your life before the night was over.

You leant forward, until your mouth ghosted his ear as you whispered. “Would you like to leave your own marks on me Sir?” You heard the hitch in his breath as you spoke. “I’d love it if you left your mark on me. Every time I see it I’d be reminded of exactly what you did to me.” You pulled back, kissing the corner of his lips as you settled back against Baekhyun’s body. From deep within his throat, it sounded like Xiumin growled.

“Hold her hands behind her back. Both of you are going to sit there and watch,” He rasped. “And you,” he said as his eyes locked back onto yours. “Will not cum until I allow you to.”

“Yes, Sir.” You replied as Baekhyun pulled your hands behind your back and held them in place.

Xiumin kissed you harshly, the force of him pushing you further back into Baekhyun. You had to arch your back slightly to remain as comfortable as you could in his hold. He broke the kiss and began his descent down your body. He took your request to heart, nipping and sucking your flesh as he moved from your mouth, to your neck, your chest, and stomach before settling between your thighs. Your head was becoming fuzzy from the stimulation, and your body was responding in kind. You could feel the heat running from your neck, down through your chest and settling in your stomach. You weren’t going to be able to look in a mirror and not think of Xiumin for weeks at this rate.

Your body felt like a live wire. If no one touched you properly soon, you might just cry from how turned on you were. Xiumin’s eyes connected with Baekhyun’s as he clamped his jaw onto your upper thigh, and sucked hard. Baekhyun’s breath hitched and you felt him roll his hips against your lower back, his now hard length grazing your hands. You moaned loudly at the sensation. These two were going to be the death of you tonight, you were this far gone and you’d barely even begun.

“Look at you, soaking through your panties. We haven’t even touched you properly yet.” He licked his lips as he hooked your legs back over Baekhyun’s, spreading you wide for him. You whimpered, so turned on and desperate for one of them to touch you where you needed it. Xiumin was an excruciatingly patient man though, you knew this as a fact. He would touch you when he was good and ready, and not a moment before that. He probably wanted to get you so worked up that you cried when he finally did give you what you wanted. “Does noona want me to touch her?” He asked condescendingly. Without waiting for your answer he pressed a finger over your clothed pussy, rubbing the digit over the wet spot of your soaked panties. You gasped at the feeling, your hands grasping behind your back, not realising until he whimpered in your ear that you’d palmed Baek’s hard length. Xiumin smirked up at both of you. “I honestly can’t tell if I’m about to ruin both of you or if you’re about to ruin me.”

“Hyung.” Baekhyun sounded breathless as he stared down at Xiumin between your legs, the elder toying with your panties as he drew out whines from you. Unbeknownst to him, every time he drew a whine from you, your hand clenched around Baekhyun’s cock. Baekhyun’s eyes were beginning to glaze over with want. He was doing everything in his power to not run his mouth or rut up into your hands. “Hyung please, god, please touch her.”

Xiumin gave him a shit eating grin as he continued playing with your clothed pussy, the fabric now completely soaked through as it all but stuck to you. “I thought I was touching her.” He leant forward and licked a stripe up your ruined panties, making you moan desperately. “See how responsive she is to my touches?”

“Please,” You all but sobbed. “Please, I need more.” Your chest heaved as you tried to regulate your breathing. You felt trapped between their two bodies, your own screaming with desire. “Sir, please.”

Apparently your near broken plea coupled with calling him Sir was all it took for Xiumin to crack. His control wavered, his patience almost lost as he ripped your panties off of you. You barely even registered the fabric tearing. His eyes floated down, taking in the soaking mess in between your legs. “You’re so fucking wet noona, just for us.” He licked his lips, that devilish smile back. You didn’t have time to breathe before he moved forward, his tongue licking a thick stripe through your folds. His voice deepened with a moan. “You taste so fucking good.” His hot breath joined in the sensational overload as his tongue ran over your clit, brushing little strokes of varying pressure and sending little shocks through your core and up your spine. “You always taste so fucking good.” He murmured against you, the vibrations sending jolts of pleasure through you. “Could eat you out all day, shit.”

Words failed you when he addressed Baek. “Doesn’t she taste divine?” His face still buried in your folds, teasing you with his skillful tongue.

Baekhyun hummed as he rolled his hips into your hand, unable to stop himself from seeking the friction. “Always hyung.” He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight of Xiumin all but making out with your pussy. “Makes it hard to stop eating her out.” He groaned as you flattened your palm against the head of his cock. It wasn’t enough, the layers of clothing separating you from him prevented the pleasure from feeling anything but teasing. Still it was better than nothing.

“You’re not wrong. I could stay here for hours.” Xiumin replied. You cried out as his tongue entered your needy hole, lapping at your juices, and you clenched around the muscle. He ate you out like a man starved. He latched onto your clit and sucked while his skilled tongue flicked over it with desperate movements. You knew it wouldn’t take you long to reach your peak, not with all the anticipation and teasing that had led to this point. You felt your legs tremble as your orgasm built inside you. But you weren’t allowed to cum yet, Xiumin hadn’t said you could. You didn’t know how you could possibly stop yourself from teetering over the edge but you tried your best to last as long as you could for him. You didn’t want to disobey him today, you wanted to be good for him.

The two of you had dabbled in having him be a brat tamer before, and whilst that was a very very fond memory, it was not fitting for today. His low voice pulled you from your thoughts. “Are you ok baby?” The pressure within you was mounting and your body shook from every flick of his tongue over your clit. You couldn’t speak, as much as you wanted to, all you could do was let out broken moans as Xiumin brought you closer and closer to your peak. A peak you didn’t want to cross without being given permission to.

Baek answered for you. “I think she wants to cum hyung. She’s practically vibrating against me.” He was enthralled with watching you fall apart on another man’s tongue, a sight he didn’t think he’d ever erase from his memory, but he wanted to keep things moving as he grew more and more desperate to be actively involved. “She’s done so well for us so far, and I can’t lie hyung. I think it’ll be really fucking hot to watch her cum all over your face.”

Xiumin had to pause at Baekhyun’s brazenness. He’d expected the dirty talk to extend to you but was rapidly finding out that the filthy exchanges they were having were only turning him on more. “Well, when you put it like that, how could I resist?” He replied. He gave you no notice as he closed his mouth over your clit, taking it between his teeth and sucked hard, the pressure that had been building exploded as your orgasm slammed into you. The force of it knocked the air from you, a loud and desperate moan left your lips, your legs shook from the intensity of it. He massaged your legs, gently lapping at your pussy while you came down. Your body twitched with the residual aftershocks he continued to draw from you with every swipe of his tongue.

As you recovered from your intense high you felt the soft press of Baekhyun’s lips on your neck. You shivered at the sensation, coupled with Xiumin rubbing his hands over your thighs, up to your waist and back down in a soothing motion. Your breathing was still laboured as you opened your eyes only to find Xiumin staring up at you, his mouth and chin glistening with your juices as he stopped overstimulating you. His gaze was still intense as he watched Baekhyun continue to leave little butterfly kisses along your neck, causing your body to shiver with need.

Your movement did not go unnoticed by Xiumin, who chuckled. “You still need more huh? Nearly passed out from your first orgasm but you already want more don’t you?”

Baekhyun smirked against your neck. “Noona, so needy for us. Was hyungs mouth not enough to fully satisfy you? Do you need something to fill you up?” He brought his hands to your breasts and tweaked your nipples as he sucked another mark into your neck.

You cried out. “God, yes. Please.” There was no denying that the orgasm Xiumin had just coaxed from you was mind blowing. Despite that, you could feel your pussy clenching around nothing. You needed more, needed something inside you.

“All in good time, can’t have you being selfish and getting all the pleasure now can we?” Xiumin said. “I think it’s time you did something for us.” He continued, as he stood from the bed and pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his toned torso to you. “To show that you deserve what we can give you.” He crooked his fingers and beckoned you to come to him. You leant forward and crawled towards him, removing yourself from Baek’s reach. Behind you Baekhyun bit his bottom lip as he watched your naked form move away from him.

You popped the button on his jeans and slowly unzipped his pants, his bulge tenting his underwear. He let out a soft grunt as you let your hand roam over his underwear. “Do not fucking tease me right now. You know better than that baby.” You smiled to yourself as memories flooded you, the times you had pushed his patience over the edge, of how roughly he took you, not letting you cum until you were a mess of tears, begging him for your release. But tonight, you were going to do as you were told, even though it was becoming evident that your bratty side wanted to play. You were doing your best to keep her in check. You pulled his pants and underwear down, letting them pool at his ankles, his cock slapped against his stomach as it was finally freed from the confines of his clothing, your mouth watered at the sight. You looked up at him and he raised a brow at you. “Why don’t you show our Baekhyun how well you suck cock?” You said. Heat flooded you at the thought of being watched while you had another man’s cock in your mouth.

He lifted his head and made eye contact with the younger, very horny man behind you. “And Baek, be a good boy and strip. You’re only allowed to watch now, no touching yourself.” You heard Baekhyun whine behind you, the poor guy was needy. He’d been rutting his hips into your lower back and hands for friction just moments ago and now he had to sit and watch, and wasn’t even allowed to relieve some of the tension he was clearly feeling.

“Do not make me wait noona.” Xiumin’s commanding tone brought you back to the present. He was hard, very hard. You didn’t want to tease but you also didn’t want to rush this so you slowly spread the precum over his cock, running your fingers up his shaft, around the head, and down again. Xiumin opened his mouth to scold you for teasing him but his words were replaced by a groan of pleasure as you wrapped your fingers around his length and started moving your hand up and down, varying the pressure as you pumped his cock. “Fuck,” He all but whispered.

He was always so responsive to your touches, so much so that it only spurred you on. You wanted, no needed to taste him. Part of you also wanted to ruin Baekhyun by making him such a horny mess that he might just cum untouched from watching you and Xiumin. You licked the tip of his swollen cock before bringing your lips to it and sucking softly. Xiumin let out a gasp, his hips bucking involuntarily as you finally took him into your mouth. You moved slowly, relishing in the feel of him in your mouth, filling it up. You blinked your eyes slowly as you gazed up at him as your mouth enveloped his cock. A sheen of sweat covered his forehead as he stared back at you through heavily lidded eyes.

He praised with a rough voice, as his fingers gripped your hair. “That’s right, baby, just like that. You look so good with my cock stuffed in your mouth.” You didn’t break eye contact as you moved down his length, curling one hand around his base as you bobbed your head, taking more of him in each time you made your descent. You flattened your tongue against the underside of his cock and felt his hands hold your head in a vice grip as his resolve started to wane, a deep groan emitting from his throat. He let his head roll back, his breathing growing erratic as short pants mixed with small groans flow out of his mouth.

He held your head in place as he rolled his hips into you, fucking into your mouth. His first strokes were slow and languid, letting you get used to the fullness in you, but he soon began pushing further and further. His cock started hitting the back of your throat, and on one deep thrust he had your nose pressed up against him as he bottomed out. He held it there for a few seconds. “Fucking hell. Look at you, taking me all the way. You love this don’t you? Choking on my cock in front of another man.” You shivered, as you felt your arousal leak from you. You hadn’t expected to be this turned on from just sucking his cock but you felt light you were on fire with need. You wanted to be used by them so thoroughly that you couldn’t move at the end of the night.

You let yourself relax around him, trusting yourself in his hands, after all Xiumin had never once hurt you. He’d been the one you’d played the roughest with but he’d always taken care of you. When he felt you relax he began thrusting again, this time his strokes were getting faster, but still just as deep. “Love fucking your face noona, you, shit, you feel so good.” You struggled to hold yourself up as he used you, his hand in your hair the only anchor holding you up as you became a puppet for his use.

You knew he was approaching his climax when he began to move with less concern for the wellbeing of your throat, gagging you with his cock every few thrusts. You did your best to keep your jaw slack, as your throat was being rubbed raw, drool and precum fell down your chin in streams. “So messy, fuck, look at you. I’m almost there baby, you can take a bit more.” You moved your spare hand to massage his balls, rolling them in your palm as he thrusted into your mouth. Your action makes him groan louder than before, needier too. Your thighs clenched together, desperate in your need for friction. But you were being good, you didn’t touch or move. You choked a few times, tears falling down your cheeks to mix with the other fluids on your chin as he came. “Such a good girl for me, took me so well, let me use you to get off.” He stroked your face gently, wiping the tears away as he smiled down at you. “Wasn’t she such a good girl Baek?” He asked.

“Fuck, yes hyung, she was.” Baekhyun’s reply was strained with desire.

“Did you touch yourself Baek?” He asked bluntly. You turned to look at him and felt a jolt through your core at just how wrecked he looked. He was breathing heavily, his chest flushed as his hands had a death grip on the sheets to stop him from touching himself. He looked so painfully hard, his rigid cock practically weeping with pre cum, twitching with need, it was so messy, and you knew how he loved it messy.

Baekhyun shook his head. “N-no. Fuck if you could see how much wetter she got from you throat fucking her hyung, my god. Please, let her touch me or let me touch myself I’m fucking dying over here.” You felt heat wash over you as you clenched around nothing. You should have felt some type of shame about how lewdly they were talking about you but you didn’t. You trusted these two men with your entire being and knew that they would never speak ill of you. Plus you were a little too fucked out to care.

Xiumin caught you staring at Baekhyun and smiled. “Baby, why don’t you treat him to your filthy mouth?” He gave you a little push to set you in motion as you crawled between Baekhyun’s legs. “Holy fuck, you weren’t wrong Baek. She is so fucking wet.” You turned your head to look back at Xiumin, who was now kneeling on the bed as he stared between your legs. His eyes flicked up to yours understanding what you wanted. “If you’re good I’ll give you what you want.” He gave your ass a light tap to direct your attention back to Baek.

“Please don’t tease me noona.” Baekhyun whimpered as you slowly grasped his length in your hand.

“You don’t want me to take my time with you?” You asked playfully. Baekhyun was always putty in your hands when it came to having his cock in your mouth. He got too eager, enjoyed it too much and never lasted that long. You guessed tonight would be no different especially since he’d had to watch you and not relieve himself while doing so.

“Fuck. No. I’m just too fucking horny to endure it.” You heard the need in his voice, the normally even tone pitching up slightly as he tried to hold himself together. “I’m doing my best to not grab your head and shove my cock in your mouth right now. Watching you with hyung, holy fuck it was so hot, I don’t know if I’m going to last very long after watching him rail your throat.” He panted.

“I’ll make you feel good Baek, I promise.” You said. He let his head fall back against the headboard as you took the head of his cock into your mouth and sucked gently. He moaned loudly at finally being touched, his eyes wide with pleasure.

“Hyung, can - fuck - can I touch her?” He sounded so broken as he tried to speak, his breath hitching every time you moved your tongue around his swollen head.

You felt Xiumin shift on the bed until he was kneeling behind you. He rubbed his hand down your spine as you took Baekhyun into your mouth once more. “You may.” Baekhyun gripped your hair as he watched his cock disappear into your mouth. You shuddered when you felt Xiumin’s fingers drag through your slick folds. “Noona, you are so fucking wet. Does it turn you on this much to be with two men?”

You lifted your head from Baekhyun’s cock, much to his disdain. “Yes, fuck” you rasped, your throat raw from the abuse Xiumin had inflicted upon it. “Sir, please touch me.”

“Why should I?” He teased as one finger circled your clit.

You moaned loudly. “I’ve been so good.”

“Do you want your noona to suck your cock Baekhyun?” Xiumin said as you lowered yourself back towards his cock. You stared into his fucked out eyes and waited for him to respond. He nodded and you shifted down, placing a kitten lick to the tip of his leaking cock, causing him to whimper at the feeling. You don’t break eye contact with him as Xiumin spoke again. “You want your noona to suck your thick cock and make you fall apart while your hyung stuffs noona with his fingers?”

Baekhyun’s eyes almost rolled in the back of his head as Xiumin spoke, his hips bucking up towards you with need. “Jesusfuckingchrist hyung, holy shit, yes. Yes I want that. Please.”

Xiumin waited for you to take Baekhyun back into your mouth before he plunged two fingers into your aching pussy. You moaned around Baekhyun’s cock at the feeling, finally being touched and having your mouth filled at the same time. You swirled your tongue on the underside of his cock as you took more of him in, finding your rhythm so you could rock back onto Xiumin’s fingers and forward onto Baekhyun’s cock.

You ran your nails down his thighs as you let your jaw relax, allowing Baekhyun to begin thrusting up into it. “Holy shit this is hot, you should see yourself noona, gonna make you choke on my cock while hyung makes you cum on his fingers.”

“You liked that didn’t you?” Xiumin remarked. “I felt you clench around me, you needy little thing. If you want to cum then you’d better hold still and let us use you.” Your eyes widened as you clenched around his fingers again.

Baekhyun began to fuck your throat as you held yourself in position, your hands gripping his thighs. You moaned around his cock as you felt Xiumin's hand match the pace Baekhyun was setting. They were both entering you at the same time, you’d never felt so full. The pressure was building within you at an alarming pace and you knew you’d snap if they kept up this momentum. Baekhyun’s moans became higher pitched and more frequent as he started to really enjoy the feeling of your throat sucking him in every time he fucked into it. The vibrations from your moans were only adding to the pleasure he was feeling. “Fuck, I’m close.” He panted.

Xiumin removed his fingers from you. You whined at the loss only to let out a strangled cry as he began to vigorously circle and tap your clit. “Then cum. Both of you.” Both of you came undone at his words, your orgasm slamming into you as Baekhyun thrusted once more and held himself in your throat as he came while you writhed against Xiumin’s relentless fingers, tears streaming down your face at the combination of choking on Baekhyun’s cock and being overstimulated by Xiumin.

You pulled off Baekhyun as you tried to get away from Xiumin’s relentless fingers. “Xiu please, I need a minute. Too sensitive.” You whined. He acquiesced and released you from his wandering hands.

Baekhyun was immobile, his chest heaving as he recovered from his own high. He somehow looked even more fucked out than he had before. “Holy shit.” He said to himself.

Xiumin pulled him from his daze by telling him to move to the chair at the end of the bed and watch. Baekhyun stood on slightly wobbly legs, walked over and threw himself down on the comfy chair facing the bed, leant back and got as comfortable as a naked man could in a hotel chair, as his eyes roamed over the bed as they sought you out. “I know this is your reward hyung but I feel like we’re all reaping this reward.” He grinned.

He had a moment where the facade cracked and you saw the excitement in Xiumin’s eyes as he took a beat to take in that he was actually experiencing one of his largest fantasies right now. Not only that, but it was going well. He only let that slip last for a second before he was back, moving to sit in the position Baekhyun had been in on the bed. You stared at him as you waited for him to tell you where he wanted you. He was lazily stroking his hard length as he let his eyes roam over your body. “Come here noona.” You made your way over to him, and climbed onto his lap.

“Are you enjoying your reward Xiu?” You asked softly as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

He let his forehead fall forward and press against yours. “It is everything I imagined and more. Thank you for helping make it happen.” He smiled genuinely at you, that beautiful gummy smile that you adored, before he kissed you. He let his hands run over your shoulders, ghosting past your breasts, running down the sides of your waist so gently it made you shiver, before coming to rest on your hips, kneading the skin there as he deepened the kiss. He sighed into you, pressing his lips down harder, hungrier. You gasped into his mouth as he pulled your hips against his cock. “Turn around. Want you to ride me while facing him. Make him watch you fuck yourself on my cock. You’ll ruin him, and I’ll get to watch your ass bounce on my cock so we both win.” Xiumin gave you another one of his annoying little smirks.

You gave him one more heat filled kiss before you turned in his lap. Baekhyun’s eyes widened as he figured out what was happening, his hands gripping his thighs in anticipation. You didn’t have much time to focus on the look on his face because Xiumin suddenly dipped his finger into your sopping entrance, using your juices to coat his cock. You let out a shaky moan as he moved you into position and waited for you to begin. He let you know you were taking too long by delivering a swift smack to you ass, which caught you by surprise as you cried out.

Slowly you lifted yourself up, aligned his cock with your core and sunk down to the hilt. You both moaned out at the feeling of your wet, hot walls moulding around him and pulling him in. You stayed like that for a second, head thrown back and nails digging into his thighs as you got used to the stretch. “Fuuuuck, that’s hot.” You heard Baekhyun groan. You locked eyes with him as you started to move, setting a steady pace to begin with as you relished in the feel of Xiumin’s cock hitting you in all the right places from this angle. Xiumin’s hands rubbed up and down your sides as he helped guide you up and down on his length. He threw his head back in pleasure at how deep you were taking him.

Baekhyun couldn’t help himself any more as he was hard again. The sight of you bouncing on Xiumin’s cock, your tits bouncing, the sounds you were making, all of it was too much. He wrapped his fingers around himself and squeezed hard. He bit back a moan, as his head tipped back as the relief of his own touch spread through his body and pre cum leaked from his tip. You moaned at the sight of him touching himself as you fucked yourself on Xiumin’s cock, quickening your pace. You heard Xiumin moaning and cursing behind you as your pace became increasingly desperate.

“Hyung,” Baekhyun’s voice was strained with need.

“Wh-fuck, what?” He grunted.

“How does she feel?”

“She feels amazing, fucking herself on me so good.” He moaned as you changed the angle of your pelvis, desperate to feel him hit that specific spot inside you. “Our baby is desperate to get off aren’t you?”

“I can’t, Xiu-” You cried out.

“Baek, get up and kneel in front of her.” He said as he pushed you off his cock, moving you onto all fours. “Baby, think you can take both of us at the same time? One fucking this pretty pussy and one using that skilled mouth of yours?”

You whimpered at his question, too overwhelmed with the prospect of being filled so wonderfully by them that you forgot to answer. “All you need to do is say yes, baby.” He said. “But I will not do anything until you tell me how much you want it.” He slowly dragged his cock through your folds.

“Yes, oh god, yes, please sir, I need it.” When he didn’t move a muscle you tried again. “Xiumin, please.”

“Sorry baby, I was just savouring my fantasy. Trust me, we want nothing more than to give you exactly what you need.” He entered you in one thrust, bottoming out with a grunt. Your hands grasped onto Baekhyun’’s arm for dear life as your body went rigid. A loud moan and gasp left your lips and when Baekhyun grabbed your jaw and brought his cock to your lips an honest to god whine came out. You were completely lost to their ministrations, theirs to use as they saw fit. As long as you came you didn’t care what they did. Baekhyun pressed his length into your mouth and began to thrust into your mouth at the same pace that Xiumin pounded into you from behind. You had never felt so full in your life.

"Look so good with our cocks inside you, noona," Baekhyun praised, his voice huskier than you’d ever heard it before, which made you clench around Xiumin, who let out a loud moan.

"Fuck, yeah," he breathed, as he snapped his hips into you even harder, working himself in and out of your pussy. "Keep talking to her like that, Baek," he grunted the younger man, "Her sweet little pussy's tightening up so fucking perfectly."

"You like when I talk dirty to you don’t you noona?" He teased as he fisted your hair into a makeshift ponytail as he matched Xiumin’s new pace. “Noona is just greedy and cock-hungry for us aren’t you? You like having hyung and I inside those needy holes of yours don’t you?" You could barely think straight as one cock entered you the other pulled back, alternating their thrusts to ensure there was never not a cock filling you.

You moaned in agreement around his cock as you let them stuff you full, telling you exactly how you felt around them and how good you’re being for them. Xiumin’s cock brushed against that spot inside you that made you cry out in pleasure, the sound muffled by Baekhyun’s cock filling your mouth. Your thighs shook as Xiumin brought you to another climax. You felt Baekhyun pull out of your mouth as he watched you fall apart on Xiumin’s cock. He kept thrusting into you as he chased his own high, his pace somehow becoming harder and faster. “Fuck noona, you’re sucking me back in. Your tight pussy is taking me so well. FUCK.” He snapped his hips into you at a brutal pace, his hands gripped your hips hard enough to leave bruises.

“You’re gonna let Baek fuck you as soon as I’m done with you. He’s been so patient, waiting to fucking ruin you on his cock.” He groaned as his pace grew erratic, a clear sign that he was going to cum soon.

“Yes Xiu, I’ll let him fuck me. He can fuck your cum back into me.” You moaned, the overstimulation beginning to turn into pleasure once more. “Please Xiu, want you to cum inside, want you to fill me up.” He growled as he thrusted into you once more as he came inside you. He held himself in you as he panted, trying to catch his breath and come back down from his dizzying high.

“Baek, your turn.” He said as he pulled out of you and flipped you on your back. His hair was stuck to his face from the exertion of fucking you. He looked spent as he moved to your side and leant down to kiss you passionately. “You look so fucking hot noona, being so good for us.” He whispered in between kisses.

Baekhyun moved so that he was between your legs and groaned at the sight before him. “Oh baby, you have no idea how much I want to wreck you now.” His first thrust was deep and slow, moving with purpose as he enjoyed the feel of being inside you. “You look so filthy with hyung’s cum dripping out of you. You wanted me to fuck it back into you?” The next thrust had more force behind it and you felt him. Your head fell back as he fucked you, his grunts and moans increasing in volume.

His hair stuck to his forehead from the exertion, his eyes alternating their focus from your face to watching his cock disappear into your pussy. He leant forward, effectively folding you in half as he sped up, his thrusts becoming more erratic. “Fuck, how are you this hot? I am not going to last long baby.”

“Shit, me either Baek.” You moaned as Xiumin moved from kissing your lips to your neck, down your chest until his mouth attached to your nipple. He used his hands to massage your breasts as his tongue laved at your nipples. He watched you intently as you cried out for them both to keep touching and fucking you. “Oh fuck, I’m gonna, Baek, I’m gonna cum.”

Baekhyun picked up his pace, slamming into you with vigour as you clamped down on his cock, milking him for all he was worth, your final orgasm of the night hitting you so hard that you almost blacked out. You felt utterly spent, in the best way, but you could do very little as the two men praised you, Baekhyun carrying you to the bathroom to clean you both up while Xiumin went to his room to steal the sheets from the bed. It didn’t matter how spent he was, he’d rather die before sleeping on cum stained sheets. When they’d finished cleaning you up all three of you fell into your bed together, a tangled mess of limbs. You had one man on either side of you. The two that had started this whole thing.

“Well that was better than my drunk texts.” You murmured. Both men burst into laughter on either side of you.

Silence settled over the room again as you all began to give in to the call of sleep, comfy, clean and warm. Baekhyun hummed. “I wish you’d had that cheerleader outfit with you.”

“Shut the fuck up.” You replied with a laugh.

“No, he’s onto something there.” Minseok reasoned as he giggled. “That outfit was really hot. Do you still own it?”

You couldn’t help but laugh at them, even though you wanted to sound pissed off. “I hate both of you, and if my legs worked I’d get up and leave this room right now.”

“Hyung high five, we broke her.” Baekhyun continued laughing.

“Shut up!” Both you and Minseok yelled happily.

You let your laughs die down as you snuggled into each other, exhausted both physically and mentally. You realised now that all the rewards had been completed. You’d think on what that meant moving forward later. Right now you just wanted to pass out, and maybe wake up to some continued fun, but you’d understand if Minseok considered the threesome request completed now.

Minseok chose that moment to speak up. “Thank you both for this. It’s uh, it’s weird to thank you for it but you know, it feels necessary. But I’m glad it was the two of you.” Minseok was doing his best to stay awake long enough to thank you both, something he really didn't need to do.

“Talk later, sleep now.” You mumbled as you felt yourself succumb to post coital exhaustion.

A/N: Um so yeah, that happened. Did the smut get away from me? Yes. Are we ok? Can I hand out fans and refreshments to any of you? Real talk, thank you for reading and sticking with me over the insanely long time it's taken to write this fic. I'd love to hear who you want her to end up with, I've got 3 endings penned and I'm still picking which one feels right so your feedback would help :)

Masterpost | Chapter 46 | Chapter 48 (coming soon)

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insert-witty-user-name-here · 7 months ago

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On Repeat

Rules: Shuffle your ‘On Repeat’/Favorites playlist and list the first 10 songs that play, then tag 10 people.

Tagged by @loki-is-my-kink-awakening. thank you, friend! 💖💖 I absolutely LOVE chatting Lokius coded lyrics with you. And you know I can never resist talking music.

Some songs on my ‘On Repeat’ playlist

Honestly, shocked only two songs from Cowboy Carter are on here because I feel like I’ve been listening to it nonstop.

Tagging a few folks, only if you want to! (Alternative rules, share 10 songs you’re enjoying right now. Idk if everyone has Spotify). @queen-of-meows @dewdropreader @wolfpup026 @mobius-m-mobius

#taking this moment to unabashedly share my other fave Cowboy Carter tracks #YA YA II Hands II Heaven Protector #also recommending the entire album Reflection by Twelve Titans #if you’re looking for some sweeping orchestral #it’s gorgeous #and has been on and off my ‘on repeat’ for years #Spotify

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transselkie · 7 months ago

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Make a playlist out of your URL

Thanks @viktorniciforov for tagging me 😊

Sooo when I made the playlist the first time I forgot that my url here is transselkie not selkieprince so you get an extra word for free 😅

My rules for this playlist were that the songs had to come from a playlist I’ve been listening to lately and that no artist could be repeated.

Playlist can be found here!

They’re Cheap (I’m Free) - Skate Polly Romance is Boring - Los Campesinos! Art School Wannabe - Sorority Noise Novocaine - The Unlikely Candidates Stupid Intruders - The Vincent Black Shadow Sober - FIDLAR EAT SPIT! - Slush Puppy (feat. Royal & the Serpent) Labour - Paris Paloma Keep On Chooglin’ - AJJ I Got Heaven - Mannequin Pussy Emily (Rough Mix) - My Chemical Romance Pine Point - PUP Rule Number One - Sleigh Bells I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE - Måneskin Normalize - Mother Mother CEASE AND DESIST - Alice Glass Ever Fallen In Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t’ve?) - Buzzcocks

I'll tag @faggot-hell and @rtnortherly, if either of you are interested in playing.

#playlist meme #tag meme #music meme #rant tag

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callunavulgari · 11 months ago

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"The kingdom come, the rise, the fall The setting sun above it all I just wanna be somebody to you"

Heather’s Top 50 Songs of 2023

thumbs — sabrina carpenter // dragostea din tei — feuerschwanz // edge of midnight — miley cyrus & stevie nicks // warrior of the mind — jorge rivera-herrans // happier than ever — kelly clarkson // flowers — miley cyrus // see you again — miley cyrus // six — six cast // fairytale — joel sunny // middle of the night — elley duhe // our light — lyn // it's terror time again — sesamoid // eat your young — hozier // step into darkness — dubkiller // got you — ga eun // just a man — jorge rivera-herrans // labour — paris paloma // the tornado — owl city // green green grass — george ezra // suzume — radwimps // can't take my eyes off you — boys town gang // survive — jorge rivera-herrans // mermaids— florence & the machine // unknown/Nth — hozier // we didn't start the fire — fall out boy // hold me like a grudge — fall out boy // where is the justice — death note musical // 30/90 — andrew garfield // everyday — buddy holly // i'm just ken — ryan gosling // what was i made for? — billie eilish // speechless — naomi scott // son of nyx — hozier // damage gets done — hozier & brandi carlile // paradise valley — honey and the sting // stand by me — florence & the machine // my prayer — the platters // baby don't hurt me — david guetta // quietly yours — birdy // someone to you — banners // one more time — blink 182 // adelaide — ramblewood // i'm just your problem — lur // you're gonna be okay — ashh blackwood // mr lonely — angel olsen // now and then — the beatles // vois sur ton chemin — bennett // history is now — natalie holt // purpose is glorious — natalie holt // the power — borislav slavov

short version | long version | spotify wrapped

short version is the link to what you see here, my helpfully abridged version. long version will lead you to the 141 song, 8 hour and 17 minute supercut playlist which i’ve been slowly cultivating since early january. spotify wrapped will lead you to a mixture of the long and the short version, which is honestly pretty accurate but does not helpfully represent my ear worms of the week. i also skewed my data for it by listening to the spiritfarer and hollow knight soundtracks on repeat to ease the wedding anxieties.

also fun fact, the cover for this year's mix is actually a picture of the tree outside our room during our wedding day.

under the cut are the lyrics that really resonated with me and only a little personal tidbits from this year, because let's be real, nobody cares.

i. thumbs || sabrina carpenter 'cause that's just the way of the world it never ends 'til the end and then you start again

This one was playing as we left the florence concert late last year and dogged me all through january and february last winter. ii. dragostea din tei || feuerschwanz Alo, salut, sunt eu un haiduc Si te rog iubirea mea primeste fericirea

Yes, it's a metal cover. Yes, I found it on tiktok. Yes, I love it unconditionally.

iii. edge of midnight || miley cyrus & stevie nicks The midnight sky is the road I'm takin' Head high up in the clouds (oh, oh)

There's THREE Miley Cyrus songs on here this year. Nuts. I really loved cranking this while driving home from Newark back when I was still hybrid. Much serotonin in those gray winter months. iv. warrior of the mind || jorge rivera-herrans & teagan earley Maybe one day they'll follow me and we'll Make a greater tomorrow, then they'll see Is it REALLY a surprise that Epic grabbed me by the throat this year?

v. happier than ever || kelly clarkson You ruined everything good Always said you were misunderstood Made all my moments your own Just fucking leave me alone I actually ended up hearing the Billie Eilish version of this first, but I ended up reading a post about how Billie's version was for the shitty boyfriend's of the world but Kelly's was to her mom and just. That resonated SO so much that it's stuck with me ever since. I have a complicated relationship with mine. She didn't come to my wedding this year. Anyway, definitely screamed this in my car on long drives. vi. flowers || miley cyrus i can buy myself flowers write my name in the sand

I need to preface this with the fact that my partner and I have a wonderful relationship that I wouldn't trade for the world. This song is still a fucking banger. vii. see you again || miley cyrus I got my sights set on you and I'm ready to aim I have a heart that will never be tamed

Third Miley song of the year, I believe all ear worms before March. I ended up getting in a Tiktok loop of body transformations set to this song while I was really getting into working with weights. It was great inspiration that I DEARLY needed that early into things. The song is also incredibly catchy. viii. six || six cast we're one of a kind, no category too many years lost in his story I honestly feel like we saw this musical last year but this song in particular dogged me into this one. ix. fairytale || joel sunny *instrumental*

Found this instrumental version of a much beloved song due to a random discover weekly and loved it so much that I seriously considered using it in my wedding. x. middle of the night || elley duhe Come, lay me down 'Cause you know this 'Cause you know this sound

Shh, it's the horny booktok song. I won't be shamed. xi. our light || lyn 夢を夢と気づいた夜君を見つめ瞼を閉じる温もりも重ねた手も声も目覚めれば微睡みへと消えて

I have been trying to finish persona 5 royal since 2020. this year, i finally beat it. xii. it's terror time again || sesamoid Oh, you just might die of fright, It's a terrifying time.

Yes, it's a Scooby Doo remix. yes, I love it. xiii. eat your young || hozier I'm starving, darling Let me put my lips to something Let me wrap my teeth around the world The horniest Hozier song since Take Me to Church in my humble opinion. I adored it immediately. xiv. step into darkness || dubkiller Blood on your hands, maybe you're dreaming? Do you believe, nightmares you're seeing?

Tiktok? xv. got you || ga eun Will you promise you’ll rescue me Take me from eternal loneliness

This was the theme song (I think?) to a Korean drama we were obsessed with for a little bit and I don't think we ever finished? Song is interesting though and sticks with you. xvi. just a man || jorge rivera-herrans When does a ripple become a tidal wave? When does the reason become the blame? When does a man become a monster? More Epic, because I am a mythology loving twelve year old at heart. The many, MANY tiktoks to this particular song did not help.

xvii. labour || paris paloma The capillaries in my eyes are bursting If our love died, would that be the worst thing?

It's catchy. I had more typed out but tumblr fucking ate it, so fuck it.

xviii. the tornado || owl city A little rain never hurt no one, so I kept pressin' on And I tried to tell myself it's always darkest before the dawn

Another song I played very loudly while driving home.

xix. green green grass || george ezra Green, green grass, blue, blue sky You better throw a party on the day that I die

Dancy song!

xx. suzume || radwimps ル・ル・ルルルルル・ルルル・ルルルルルルル・ル・ルルルルル・ルルル・ルルルルルル We saw this in theaters! I really loved it! xxi. can't take my eyes off you || boys town gang You're just too good to be true Can't take my eyes off of you The Tiktok dances got me. More serotonin when I really needed it. xxii. survive || jorge rivera-herrans Six hundred lives I'll take Six hundred lives I'll break And when I kill you, then my deed is over

More Epic! xxiii. mermaids || florence & the machine You only get one night upon the shore So dance like you've never danced before

I love Florence. That is all. xxiv. unknown / nth || hozier You know the distance never made a difference to me I swam a lake of fire, I'd have walked across the floor of any sea

Hozier was honestly the artist that kept me the most company this year if I'm not counting Spiritfarer or Hollow Knight. xxv. we didn't start the fire || fall out boy Mars rover, Avatar, self-driving electric cars SSRI's, Prince and The Queen die World trade, second plane, what else do I have to say?

I know it won't happen, but I hope every generation does a remake/remix of this song. Also, I saw Billy Joel himself in concert this year! xxvi. hold me like a grudge || fall out boy Hold me, hold me like a grudge The world is always spinning, and I can't keep up, whoa Honestly, I was a fan. xxvii. where is the justice || death note cast isn't everybody sick to death of all this stuff can't we all stand up and say enough?

This song gets stuck in my head like no one's business. xxviii. 30/90 || tick tick boom cast making choices, wicked witches poppy fields, or men behind the curtain tiger lilies, ruby slippers clock is ticking, that's for certain I still think that if Stranger Things did a musical episode Steve Harrington would have Andrew Garfield from Tick Tick Boom energy. xxix. everyday || buddy holly Every day seems a little longer Every way, love's a little stronger

Good Omens 2 dropped! I loved it! I also didn't love it! But mostly I was just happy. xxx. i'm just ken || ryan gosling I wanna know what's like to love, to be the real thing Is it a crime? Am I not hot when I'm in my feelings? And is my moment finally here, or am I dreaming?

I went to see this movie by myself because I was sick of waiting for someone to go with me and honestly had a great time. It was silly and fun and I loved the fact that so many dudes got so incredibly butt-hurt about it. xxxi. what was i made for || billie eilish 'Cause I, I I don't know how to feel But I wanna try

God, this song. It made me cry at the end of Barbie and I've been getting up in my feelings about it ever since. xxxii. speechless — naomi scott I will take these broken wings And watch me burn across the sky Apparently this is from the Aladdin live action? I haven't seen it so I can't confirm, but I DID hear this song this summer and fall in love with it. xxxiii. son of nyx || hozier *instrumental* This one might be my favorite? xxxiv. damage gets done || hozier And, darling, I haven't felt it since then I don't know how the feeling ended But I know being reckless and young Is not how the damage gets done

Another Hozier!!!!!! xxxv. paradise valley || honey and the sting Take what you want from me I bring it willingly

I may have done these next three out of order, but hey! I got married this year! As some of you may know, paradise valley has been the song that I have been obsessed with since I first heard it on Wolf 359 back in 2018/2019. I couldn't figure out a way to make it work in a traditional sense for the wedding, so I ended up using it as a private last dance. As the clock was hitting ten o'clock we had our dj gently shoo the stragglers out the door and just crooned this to each other in the dark. It was probably my favorite part of the entire night. xxxvi. stand by me || florence & the machine So darlin', darlin', stand by me Oh, stand by me

This was our first dance. As it should be. We timed our few spins around the 'darlins' and it honestly went great. 10 out of 10, would dance again. xxxvii. my prayer || the platters My prayer is to linger with you At the end of the day I did a sneaky thing. It was Nick's grandparents 65th wedding anniversary a few days before our wedding, so I quietly found out "their song" and had our DJ play it as the first official couples/slow dance of the night after wishing them a happy anniversary. They cried. I cried. The photographer cried. It was great. xxxviii. baby don't hurt me || david guetta What is love? Baby, don't hurt me

Yeah, it's just a catchy cover. xxxix. quietly yours || birdy I've always been yours Only yours This was from the Persuasion soundtrack and god, it's just so achingly haunting. xl. someone to you || banners I don't wanna die or fade away I just wanna be someone Well, doesn't everyone?

Look. I just wanna be someone. xli. one more time — blink 182 Do I have to die to hear you miss me? Do I have to die to hear you say goodbye? I don't wanna act like there's tomorrow I don't wanna wait to do this one more time One more time. I got tickets to their concert next year. We'll see if they cancel this one. xlii. adelaide || ramblewood Wish you could lay those shadows down And find your way back home

I think this is a local artist? I fell in love with the song though. xliii. i'm just your problem || lur Sorry I don't treat you like a goddess Is that what you want me to do?

Watched Fionna and Cake in like a day and a half and fell all the way back in love with Bonnie and Marceline. xliv. you're gonna be okay || ashh blackwood puff out your chest, take a deep breath you're gonna be okay

This showed up on an anxiety mix and now I literally sing it to myself if I'm having a fast day. It is VERY short, but impactful. xlv. mr lonely || angel olsen Now, I am a soldier A lonely soldier Away from home Through no wish of my own My Yuletide fic that has not yet been revealed was about [REDACTED]. I listened to this and a handful of other sad, lonely songs while writing it. xlvi. now and then || the beatles Oh, now and then I want you to be there for me This song has DEVASTATED me since it came out. I will not be the same again. xlvii. vois sur ton chemin || bennett Vois sur ton chemin Gamins oubliés, égarés

Another tiktok ear worm. I'm not much for techno, but I love this one. xlviii. history is now || natalie holt *instrumental*

Loki fucked me all the way up, guys. I know everyone is crying about it, and I'm crying too! It's beautiful and tragic and one of the most fantastic endings for a character arc that I have EVER seen out of Marvel. I HOPE they leave it alone. I hope they leave it as is so we get to keep the beautiful ending and they don't fuck it up. xlix. purpose is glorious || natalie holt *instrumental*

Again, fucked me ALL the way up. I wept. And watched it three times in a row. These two songs will be on my writing playlist for the rest of time. l. the power || borislav slavov I found you too soon Shining star of mine, hold tight Don't fight the power

I have not officially finished Baldur's Gate. However, every iteration of this song is haunting me.

#heather says what #fanmixes #2023 #year in review #year in music #new year's memes #music makes the world go round

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theshippirate22 · 2 years ago

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listen i’ve got like 18 different wips that aren’t going anywhere so I should definitely not start another one but i’ve just thought of the best thing and i don’t know who to tell so y’all get to hear:

(background here: i’ve been listening to Labour by Paris Paloma on repeat pretty much since the second it was released. if you’re on tiktok, you’ve probably heard it, and if you haven’t go listen to it right now because it slaps every time)

so transfem stevie harrington was disowned by her parents as a teenager for being a disappointment and a failure, shit like that, and so when Prince Thomas asks her to marry him, she’s really got no other choice. there’s a caveat, however. the prince isn’t allowed to marry a woman, because it’s generally accepted that women are useless and it makes more sense for two men to keep the throne (i.e. no homophobia, lots of misogyny) so stevie has to keep her dead identity as Prince Steve.

her marriage to Tommy is miserable, though. it’s no surprise he was so desperate to marry her, because no one else could stand him. he’s so particular about things, and he likes “steve” a certain way- all the ways that make stevie so horribly dysphoric. she ends up hiding in her wing of the castle when she’s not needed to dress up and hide away the part of her that wants something else.

it doesn’t help that her valet is the sweetest, strangest man ever, who seems to know what goes on when Tommy’s away. stevie’s quite sure it’s him that’s leaving dresses and makeup and jewelry and shoes in her armoire when she’s not around.

the worst of it though, is her daughter. because all royalty is male, heirs are chosen through a competition to establish the fittest. Lady Maxine won the competition a few years prior and while she seems to know somethings off with stevie, she hasn’t seemed to figure it out quite yet. when max gets in trouble with Tommy and things escalate a little too quickly, stevie knows they’ve got to get out of this castle, and this kingdom as soon as they can, if only to protect max.

while they’re rushing to pack and slip out the window in the dead of night, stevie’s valet, eddie, catches them but instead of turning them in and forcing them to face their fates, he steals them a chaise and some horses, deciding to come with them and offer whatever protection he can because he’s “loyal to milady.”

while they try to escape, they run into an overworked, livid housewife (nancy!) and a depreciated, frustrated lesbian (robin!) who decide to come along with them.

idk maybe i’m delusional? i just think it could be so good lmk if you’d even read something like that and i’ll do a snippet

#steve harrington #stevie harrington #trans femme steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #max mayfield #nancy wheeler #medieval au #fantasy au #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #steddie #steddie fanfiction #steddie angst #steddie fluff #ronance #fruity four #platonic stobin

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maria021015 · 6 months ago

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“Xander!” Zaida threw open the front door of the apartment and didn’t bother to lock it behind her as she burst in like a tornado, her boots thudding heavily against the floorboards. She found him sitting on the living room couch, his leg bouncing impatiently as he twisted his phone between his hands. “You are not going to believe what I found out!”

“Do me a favour and look outside the window Zaida,” He responded, his voice cold and dangerously quiet. “What do you see?”

Zaida’s smile faded, the only sound filling her ears was the drumming of her own heart and ragged sounds of her laboured breathing from her hurried trek home. "What do you mean?”

“What do you see?” He repeated, not moving from his spot, but at least his knee had stopped bouncing.

“I can’t see shit, it’s dark out.” She frowned. What was going on?

“Exactly, Zaida. It’s dark out. How many times have I told you that I don’t want you out in the dark? That you are to walk straight home after school?” Xander’s words were controlled, but sharp. His tone was a smooth surface, but seething anger bubbled beneath.

“I-” she stumbled over her words, taken aback by the waves of searing rage that rolled off him. “I forgot.”

“You forgot?” Only now did he turn his head to look at her.

“I- I’m sorry, okay? I just…it was for a good reason. I had a lead. I-I found something huge!” Zaida dumped her backpack on the floor by the coffee table.

“You had a lead ? Are you even listening to yourself?” He scoffed. “You’re a teenager. It’s not your job to go off chasing ‘leads’. It’s not your job to be getting involved in any of this!”

“You’re the one who's not listening!” She snapped back, her volume rising along with her built-up frustrations. “You never listen! I’ve been telling you for years that I know what I saw that day. I saw it again at that bus. At the video store. I knew that whatever did that - whatever killed Mom and Dad - was not a mountain lion!”

“Stop it, Zaida,” Xander warned, his fists clenching.

“I was right.” She ignored him, pressing the issue further. “I went to Lydia’s and I saw what did it. She had a video on her phone, from last night.”

“I said stop it.” His voice shook with barely concealed fury, nostrils flaring. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It wasn’t a mountain lion, Xander!” She threw her arms up in the air, her own ire sparking. “It was a wolf !”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!” His voice boomed and he jumped to his feet faster than she’d ever seen him move. He was inches away from her face, jaw muscles clenching as his teeth ground together. “I don’t want to hear another word about any of this.”

The girl’s heart seized, tears welling in her wide eyes. She had never seen her brother like this before. For a split second, she thought she saw a flash of fear in his face, but it was swiftly replaced by that burning anger.

“You don’t believe me?” The realisation hit her like a punch to the gut. “I got proof and you still don’t believe me?”

“Where’s your proof then?” He took a step back, his body language demanding she come forward with it. “Show me.”

“I-I don’t have it anymore. It got deleted, but I saw it!” she defended. “It was huge, and black, and its eyes practically glowed red!”

“What you saw, was probably a clip from a movie.” Xander took deep breaths, trying to de-escalate the situation. “There are no wolves in California. There haven’t been for almost a hundred years.”

“I know what I saw!” Zaida insisted, still in disbelief that he was acting like this.

“When are you going to figure out that it’s all in your messed up head, Zaida!” He pointed a finger at her, tapping it against her forehead. Her heart sank at his words and she slapped his hand away from her. How could he? “You’re obsessed with this. It’s not healthy. You can’t be showing up at crime scenes. You can’t be stalking victims and going through their things. You’re seeing things that aren’t there because you’re still holding onto what happened. You’re afraid to let go and forget about it, but they’re not coming back, Zay.”

“You don’t think I know that? I know they aren’t coming back because I’m the one who found them completely torn apart by five-fingered slashes.” She shook her head, tears finally falling. “I don’t need to forget anything. It’s you who needs to remember .”

With her final words, she turned her back on him and stormed out of the living area, slamming her bedroom door behind her so hard that the frame shook. Her chest shook with sobs as she collapsed onto her bed. It was all in her messed-up head. How could he say that to her? He’d never spoken to her like that before. Not even once.

#teen wolf fanfiction #teen wolf #teen wolf fanfic #stiles #stiles stilinski #stiles x oc #female original character #female oc

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iguessitsjustme · 1 year ago

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Last song tag:

I was tagged by @gillianthecat to share the last song I listened to. Unfortunately (or luckily depending on who you are) I am incapable of sharing just one song cause I am constantly listening to music if I’m not at work or watching a show, I’m listening it music. So I’m gonna share the songs I listened to today and yesterday. Well I wrote this yesterday so it's more like what I listened to yesterday and the day before. Enjoy:

Well first and foremost the actual last song I listened to is labour by Paris Paloma. I listened to this song on repeat as I walked to work today yesterday. It’s catchy and also it’s just…yes. If you grew up as a woman or present as a woman, I highly recommend this song. Just..trust me.

The next thing I’ve been listening to is 5-STAR by Stray Kids. The whole album. Just. Amazing. If you haven’t seen the music video for S-Class yet, trust me and watch it. It’s insane. Another of my favorites from the album is FNF.

Other songs I’ve been listening to:

Paper Planes - Elina (if you like Sinners by Lauren Aquilina, you’ll probably like this one)

Fade - Jeff Satur. And also the English version. I cannot stress enough how much this song means to me. Not only is it an excellent song but when I was in the midst of a massive panic attack a few weeks ago, this is the only song that managed to help keep me calm and ground me.

Take it Away - The About Youth theme

Everything I Ask For - The Maine

We All Roll Along - The Maine

The last two were specifically because I was feeling nostalgic. Anywayyy. I cheated but I’ve been listening to a lot of songs and bouncing back and forth between them that it only felt fair that I listed them all. So thanks again to @gillianthecat for tagging me because I clearly wanted to talk about songs and haven't.

I'm not gonna tag anyone specifically, but if you want to do it consider this me tagging you. But you gotta tag me if you do it so I can see what you're listening to and steal your listen to your songs too!

#tag game #rae irl #oops i cheated and listed a bajillion songs instead of just one #i extra cheated because i also listed a whole album #also keep in mind that i'm also listening to other stray kids songs too but their newest album currently has me in a choke hold

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feathered-serpents · 2 years ago

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I really don’t talk about Sif as much as I should because she’s great BUT I’ve been listening to Paris Paloma’s Labour on repeat (as one does) and imagining an animatic with all the women in the games and this part is just. Perfect for her

#god of war #god of war ragnarok #god of war: ragnarok

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hilsonamore · 4 months ago

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tysm my beloved for the tag! <3

here are 5 songs i’ve been listening to on repeat these past few days:

tagging: @wilsons-three-legged-siamese @roseofstardust @sillyhyperfixator and all my other mutuals😔💗

yay @vzajemnik thank you for tagging me! posting 5 songs i'm into right now:

zombie girl is first because i've had this song on repeat for literal days now. ooh emptiness tell me bout your nature maybe ive been getting you wrong....etc you know how it is sometimes

anywaysss i'm tagging @saintsgrrl @catholicjinx @goreofbabylon @malasusanka & anyone else who wants to participate

#Spotify

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blu-joons · 3 years ago

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Our Little Girl ~ Jeon Jungkook

Pairing: Expecting Dad!Jungkook x Reader

Warnings: Slightly descriptive pregnancy, labour and birth

Word Count: 5.3k

Summary: Your little girl has been what the two of you have dreamt of for so long, finally the time has come to welcome her into the world with Jungkook by your side.

“You know, for a man that’s about to raise a daughter for the next eighteen years at least, you’re looking rather cocky.”

Jungkook could only smile from the other side of the room as a grimace danced upon your face at the feeling of another contraction hitting you. You’d lost count of the hours you’d been almost doubled over in bed some time ago, barely able to keep your eyes open at the excruciating pain that you found yourself in. With each passing breath, the gaps of relief that came between contractions became smaller and smaller, almost unbearable.

You’d watched plenty of documentaries before your pregnancy to know what to expect, and yet as you found yourself staring forwards at the figure of your husband, keeping his distance from your growing temper, none of what you saw on the television seemed to play out before you. Under watery eyes, you could just make out the time on the clock hanging just above Jungkook’s head, 3:15am. You scoffed at the sight, doubting even in yourself how much longer you could go through such an ordeal. Despite the several months you’d had to lead up to this moment, not a single part of it could truly prepare you for what was to come.

As another struck against the pit of your stomach, Jungkook raced back across to your side, resting his hands over your reddened ones that gripped tightly onto the rails beside your bed. Murmurs of encouragement came from him, words you’d listened to him repeat for countless hours, and still each time they somehow managed to make your heart a little bit happier. As he counted you through the breaths to see you through, his free hand brushed over your hair, ignoring the beads of sweat that had formed in your hairline as best as he possibly could, focusing on the task at hand and being the best possible husband instead.

“You’re doing so incredibly well,” he whispered as he noticed that the pain was beginning to subside once again, offering you the best possibly smile he could muster, hiding his own feelings of exhaustion that were beginning to come through. Your head nodded, tilting slightly to the left, biting down on your bottom lip until you were sure that the contraction had subsided. A small wriggle from your little one let you know they were done for the time being, waiting patiently, or impatiently, to make their grand entrance.

“You’re getting close now,” your midwife called out, stood in the doorway, keeping an eye on the corridor as she had done for most of the evening, and night. “I must admit, I’ve not seen many women get through labour as well as you have for quite some time Y/N.”

“I’m not really left with much of an alternative to get through it right now,” you sighed, throwing your body back against the bed, allowing the sweat ridden sheets to wrap around you. The end never seemed to quite be in sight, no matter how many times her cheery voice suggested otherwise. In fact, if Jisoo wasn’t quite such a sweetheart, you’d have probably given her what for a long time ago with all of her reassurances.

“She’s a strong girl, I always told you that,” Jungkook whispered from the side of you, grinning proudly across at the elder woman. “So strong I think I might end up having to take up one of your beds soon with a couple of broken knuckles, are women supposed to squeeze this hard when they’re in labour?”

Jisoo’s head nodded, having told you about her four kids several times throughout the night, she had experience on both sides. She’d seen it all, broken hands, broken noses, but best of all, hundreds of humans enter the world.

“Y/N you do what you want, ignore your husband,” she teased.

Once again, your head could only manage a nod, too consumed by the everchanging feelings that were going on around your bump to truly pay much attention to what was being said around you. The beep of the heart monitor, murmurs of passers-by, shrieks of other women in the ward all seemed to amalgamate into one at this point.

“I don’t think we’ll have to wait around much longer for baby to arrive,” she advised the two of you, “but things are only going to get worse, are you sure that I can’t get you anything?”

“No,” you muttered, despite a concerned Jungkook looking down at your tired figure, “I said that I was going to try and do this naturally, and until I can’t take it anymore, that’s what I’m going to do.”

“No one would think any less of you if you wanted an epidural,” Jungkook reminded you, moving his hand back across to rest over your now much calmer one. “Or maybe gas if you’re not feeling a needle? We saw it on that programme, remember?”

“We spent an hour laughing at a woman too high to even push,” you scolded, shaking your head at the memory. It had tickled you at the time, but the more you thought about not being able to remember your baby’s birth like she had, the more off-putting it became.

“It’s all here just in case,” Jisoo spoke up anyway, pointing across to a small table that was at the back of the delivery room, “too many women change their minds last minute and then we have to leap into action with it all.”

“I bet you might end up having another case like that, she’s a stubborn one,” Jungkook joked.

“Excuse me, I’ll have you- “

You were cut off by another pain stabbing against your side, hurling your body forwards, instantly gripping tighter onto Jungkook’s hand, causing him to yelp. He sat further up in his seat, throwing his free arm around your back, tracing circles against the exposed bit of skin your hospital gown showed off. Your body didn’t have much time to react, snapping your eyes around to look at Jungkook, searching for any bit of help he could offer. Instead, he could only stare helplessly back at you, there was nothing that he could do to truly take away your pain, nothing that would make the experience better for you in that moment, instead all he could promise was to be the best possible father and husband once your little girl eventually decided to come into the world.

As the pain fell aside once again, you leant across to rest against Jungkook’s shoulder, soaking his grey tee, not that he minded, pressing a kiss against the top of your head.

“So strong,” he whispered against your skin, as he had done tens, if not hundreds of times since your water broke in the very early hours of the previous day.

“I feel so weak,” you hummed in response to him, loosening your grip against his hand once again, holding onto only his index finger, admiring the tattoos that he wore so proudly. “I always thought I was strong Kook, but even this might be too much for me.”

His head shook instantly at your words, searching across to Jisoo for a small piece of reassurance that could remind you how good of a job you were doing in delivering your miracle.

“Soon,” her voice called out, although it wasn’t much, it was a small bit of hope that you could hold onto that your ordeal would be done soon. You adored Jungkook, but the calls of the professional who had taken such good care of you made you feel a lot better in an instant.

“Soon,” Jungkook reiterated, tightening the hold that he had around your waist, inviting you to relax into his side as opposed to the bed that you’d been on for hours. “This will all be worth it; you just have to remember that through the hard times.”

Another hum came from you, tracing aimlessly against his calloused skin. “I wish it was as easy for me to believe that as it is for you to say it right now.”

“Y/N,” he whispered, kissing against your forehead once again, “please don’t start giving up on any of this right now.”

“I’m just tired,” you whined, fighting the urge to give your eyes even a second to close out of fear of what might happen if you did. “Every part of me is so tired right now.”

“I get it,” Jungkook assured you, refusing to let you go through the fight alone, “I can’t even begin to imagine how hard this is for you right now my love.”

“Are you sure it’s too late for us to swap positions?” You joked, trying to remove the negativity that ran through your mind, “I think you’d love to be in labour secretly.”

“You know I would if I could, in a heartbeat,” he sniggered, raising his free hand up innocently, “it’s just such a shame that you’re the one that’s got to go through this. Trust me though, it’s not easy being a spectator, seeing you in so much pain is breaking my heart, I can only watch in awe of what an incredible woman you are.”

“You’ve got a good one there, Y/N,” Jisoo called out as she busied herself in the room, paperwork in hand, unable to stop herself tuning into your conversation. “You’d be surprised how many husbands sit back and relax during a time like this.”

“See, you’ve got a good one,” Jungkook continued to joke, tapping lightly against your arm, “can I get that in writing to remind her of this when this is all over?”

“I can change my mind,” Jisoo responded, drawing a light giggle out of you as the two of them continued to exchange innocent threats for a few minutes, until you chose to interrupt.

The mood of the room instantly turned sombre as a loud groan came from you, leaning forwards once again, breathing under the command of your husband. Whilst Jisoo continued to notice how much quicker your contractions came, Jungkook was solely focused on you, counting each time, resting his hands where you needed them, offering his shoulder back for you to rest on as soon as the contraction finished once again.

“I think I’ve decided something,” you whispered across to Jungkook once you’d caught your breath, “we are definitely only having the one child.”

“But I thought we agreed on an army,” he smirked, earning himself a slap against the bicep from you, although with your strength, the strike was pretty weak, even by your own high standards. Still, Jungkook grabbed at his arm, gasping at the sudden strength that had come over you. “Jisoo will tell you, I bet loads of women say that, but once they remember how sexy their husbands are, a quick trip to the bedroom, and suddenly baby number two comes along.”

“Have you ever met a man who makes sex sound so unappealing?” You asked Jisoo before she even had the time to respond to Jungkook’s comment. “It’s rather confident of you to assume that you’re that sexy anyway.”

Rather than answer either of you, Jisoo made her way across to you, asking Jungkook to give the two of you a bit of space as she checked how far dilated you were. You’d counted down almost every single centimetre, as if your little girl enjoyed teasing you before she was even a part of your world. Each time you hoped for the magic number, but each time Jisoo had muttered something else. You’d almost lost onto your last stretch of hope, that was until you looked across, noticing a wry smile etched across her face.

Before she even said the words, you knew exactly what the smile meant. As if your contractions hadn’t made things obvious enough, the expression on her face was the final touch you needed to know that at last that end was somewhat in sight. Once she called Jungkook back across to your side, his eyes locked with yours, the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile, extending his arm out for your hand to intertwine with his. The relief was clear on your face, and in your hold, your body was in turmoil, but now it seemed as if you could finally begin to settle.

You were all too aware that there was a long road ahead of you, but just the thought of pushing appealed to your body and every part of you that was crying out for a rest.

“Ten centimetres,” Jungkook whispered beside you, “I bet that feels pretty good.”

“It feels pretty good,” you smirked, keeping your eyes on him as he sat back down in the chair at your bedside. “I had no idea the body could stretch as big as this, it’s surreal.”

Although he hadn’t taken too close of a look at everything that was going on at the foot of your bed, Jungkook had done enough research to know just how your body was changing. From the very first sign of a bump, Jungkook had waited impatiently for the moment that he finally got to see your little girl come into the world, the final change that would complete what the two of you had dreamt of for so many months.

“I love you,” his voice then whispered, just as your eyes looked away from his and down to your bump, “and our baby, I love our baby too.”

“I love you too,” you smiled, quickly looking back at him, “our little one is the luckiest girl in the world to have you.”

What came over the next few minutes felt like a blur to you, several instructions were sent your way, your body reshuffled with your legs propped up, pillows placed behind your back, and a towel dabbed against your head, but one thing remained, the hold of Jungkook’s hand tightly against yours, refusing to leave your side as the first few pushes began.

“This is ridiculous,” you huffed, just after the first few. You’d hoped for some sort of immediate impact, but your baby made no sign of movement instead. If you hadn’t spent hours laid in the hospital bed, you would have given up there and then, but there was one man that was never going to let you do that.

“Patience,” was all that Jungkook had to say, desperate to try and calm you down as he noticed how flustered you became. His hands pressed against your red cheeks before wiping underneath your watery eyes, failing to withhold the pressures that were placed before you.

Whilst labour was never something you expected to be a walk in the park, you could never have prepared yourself for the overwhelming feelings of pain that you’d end up enduring throughout your labour.

“If I push one more time, my body is going to cave,” you admitted, leaning against the cold metal of the rail against the bed. Jungkook’s head instantly shook, moving his arm around you to pick you back up, holding your back against the palm of his large hand.

“You’re far too strong to give up now,” he smiled, standing up from his chair to press a kiss against the side of your head, “there’s still pain relief if you want it, no one is going to think any less of you if that’s what you choose to do,” he reminded you once again, but still your head shook, you’d had plans for how your labour was going to go, and a natural birth was always top of your list of things that you wanted to see through. “Just hold my hand, and don’t break any of my bones and I promise that we’ll get through this together.”

Your eyes rolled at his warning, pinching especially hard against his hand to keep him on his toes, and make sure that he kept his mouth shut too.

“I’m only messing with you,” he whimpered, shaking at your hand for you to loosen your grip around him. “Just try and keep positive babe, we’ve jumped over too many hurdles over the past day to give up now. This one might just be a little bit bigger, but I know more than anything else in the world that you’re going to get over it.”

Your eyelids slowly fluttered shut, letting go of a shaky breath in the hope that it would keep you so composed. Rather than focus on the pain that came from your bump, your mind focused on the traces that Jungkook ran along the back of your hand, just like you’d done against his only a couple of hours ago.

“I just want to hold her and be done with this,” you continued to vent, opening your eyes back up, flinching slightly at the bright lights that came from all four corners of the room you’d somehow ended up calling home.

“I mean it when I say not much longer this time,” Jisoo smiled from the foot of the bed, perched on a stool, keeping a close eye on proceedings. “It’s natural to feel like you want to throw in the towel, there’s often a bit of a wait between dilation and pushing, not feeling anything can sometimes feel worse than the pain of a contraction.”

“You’re spot on,” you responded, forcing the smallest of smiles to your face, hearing a gentle giggle come from Jungkook. “At least the pain let me know that she was definitely moving.”

As if on cue, your baby began to make her presence known again, with Jungkook rising to his feet once again when he noticed how quickly you shot forwards. His arm reached out across your chest to stop you moving too far forwards, just as Jisoo had advised.

Something about this contraction just felt different for you though, as if your little girl was giving you a sign that she really was on her way. Although you couldn’t feel her drop, the pain certainly did. The smile on your face instantly captured Jungkook’s attention, unsure if he should worry, or be pleased to see a sign of happiness in your expression.

“I can feel her,” you whispered across to him before he even had the chance to ask, “it’s like she’s letting me know she’s on her way Kook.”

“That’s a good thing, right?” He anxiously queried, looking across to Jisoo who’s head nodded. “She really is on her way, our little girl.”

“Our little girl,” you repeated, feeling his hands press to either side of your face, just managing to press the softest of kisses against your puckered lips before another contraction hit. His left arm instantly moved around your waist as his right hand held onto yours, it had become second nature for Jungkook now to step each time that your body called out for him, a murmur of his name was all that he needed to know exactly what you wanted from him, and as another contraction passed, he was relieved when he could sit back down again.

As soon as it passed, both you and Jungkook stared across to Jisoo, desperate for any sort of update she had on how things were going.

“Just keep doing what you’re doing,” she assured you, “plenty of pushes coming up Y/N.”

“R-really?”

“Hey,” a deep voice whispered beside you, brushing his thumb back across the pad of your hand, drawing your eyes across to him with the sound of your voice. “It’s going to be alright, we’ve talked about all of this, the two of us are here, and very soon our little girl will be here soon, remember why you’re doing this Y/N.”

“Pushing feels so real,” you slightly chuckled, feeling the beat of your heart quicken in your chest, “are you sure it’s really time to push?”

“Absolutely,” a cheery Jisoo smiled from the foot of the bed, repositioning your legs slightly so that you were a little more stretched out. “When the next contraction comes, I want you to take a big deep breath, and then lots of little pushes, let your body guide you rather than you guide your body. Listen to my voice, and most of all, listen to Jungkook too, he sounds like he has all the right things to say to you.”

“That’s exactly how we got into this position,” you sighed, shooting a glare in his direction.

“Unfortunately, it’s exactly how you’re going to get out of this position too,” Jisoo grinned, shaking her head as Jungkook leaned forwards to try and give her a high five. “Just support your wife,” she smiled, “I’ve spent less then a day with this guy and I’m struggling to see how you’ve managed to put up with him for so many years.”

“Don’t make me regret it,” you called out, just as another contraction came. The mutters of ‘push,’ that came from both of the people beside you instantly set your body in motion, clutching tightly onto the rail, and Jungkook’s hand as you tried to push down as best as you could, grimacing at the pain.

By the time the contraction had passed, you could feel how quickly your bottom lip was beginning to swell, pouting across at Jungkook, who was unable to hide his surprise when he noticed how red your lip was.

“Still beautiful,” he complimented, leaning forwards once again to press a kiss against the reddened skin, “and so strong too. Who knew I managed to marry such a strong woman?” He questioned, receiving no answer from either of you. It came as little surprise to him, instead he grabbed the towel that was beside him and dabbed it gently over your forehead, and your lip too, trying to make the swelling as minimal as possible before you bit down again.

As another contraction soon came around, you couldn’t quite get your head around at how surreal it was suddenly all becoming. You’d sat with your little girl nested in your tummy for two days short of nine months, and now you could slowly feel her making her way down to enter the world. All of the fears and the doubts that you’d had about labour had been torn apart, your dreams had been blown so far out of proportion, no part of what you were doing felt real anymore. But for the two of you, it felt like the best, and worst, experience in the world, the pain had been hard, but slowly it was beginning to feel as if it was worth it for you both.

When the next contraction came around, the sound of Jisoo’s voice stopped you from biting down on your bottom lip, feeling her hand move a little further up your leg, carefully pushing your legs a little further apart, surprising even you by how flexible you suddenly were.

“I can feel something,” you nervously whispered, looking across to Jungkook who was trying to get the best look he could at what was going on from beside you.

“No need to worry,” Jisoo instantly replied to you, “but I can definitely see the first signs of your little girl.”

“Really?” You chuckled, feeling Jungkook’s head turn to look back across at you. His eyes looked at you for permission, as your head slowly nodded, encouraging him to stand up from his seat and walk across, peering over your leg to where the first sightings of your little one’s head could be seen. A quiet gasp came from Jungkook, squeezing gently against your hand, feeling his eyes watering at the sight before him.

“She already looks beautiful,” he whispered up to you, “I can’t believe she’s all ours Y/N.”

“I wish I could see,” you chuckled, trying your hardest to look past your bump, but failing with ease. You couldn’t help but laugh, remembering all the times you’d failed to see your feet, or bend down to change your shoes, only now, at the most important time, your bump had stopped you from getting your first glimpse of your little girl. A small part of you couldn’t help but be slightly envious that Jungkook had such a clear view from beside you of everything that was going on.

However, as soon as your next contraction hit, Jungkook’s attentions were turned straight back to you, sitting back down in a heartbeat as more encouraging whispers came from him. He’d never told you how proud and how in love he was with you than he had done today, but he also knew he could never love you more than the moment you brought his child into the world.

The late nights, early mornings, and everything that came in between during your pregnancy had been hard on you both, but everything that you needed from Jungkook, he did with a smile. He could never appreciate enough how incredible your body was to carry his little girl, to nurture her so perfectly and give her such good health. There was simply never going to be enough that he could do to repay you for everything that you’d given him over the last nine months, and for the rest of his life too.

“Y/N, keep pushing!” Jisoo’s voice called out, snapping you out of the small daydream that you found yourself in. By the sound of her voice, you knew that something significant was happening, with adrenaline the only thing keeping you going, you did as she said, pushing as hard as you could, paying close attention to the sound of Jungkook’s voice, the only thing that had kept you going through out.

“She’s coming,” he whispered, flickering his eyes between you and your baby, noticing how quickly she seemed to be arriving. Your head nodded, repeating his words over and over again in your head, the only boost of motivation that you needed to dig in to somewhere you didn’t know you had, using up every last ounce of energy that you possibly could.

“Kook,” you whimpered, as you felt the contraction begin to collapse again.

“Just one more,” Jisoo then called out.

“You can do it,” he urged, leaning closer in towards you.

Although your head shook, your body still pushed, and soon the cries of your little girl could be heard ringing throughout the room, as tears fell from both yours and Jungkook’s eyes, feeling his hand slip out of yours so that you could collapse down against the bed.

“I love you, you’re incredible,” he chimed, giving you a moment before leaning over you, brushing the hair out of your face, coupled with a lingering kiss against your forehead, ignoring the droplets of tears that fell from his cheeks against your own. “She’s here Y/N.”

In just a matter of moments, Jungkook moves away from your side, replaced with your little girl settling against your bare chest, with Jisoo dabbing away at her to remove the markings of blood, stretching out of her limbs and making sure to clear out her airways.

As your eyes looked down at her for the very first time, your breath was taken by what was before you. “Wow,” was all you could whisper as you studied every fine detail of the bundle you held tightly against your chest. “Look at you,” you soon added, sniffling back the tears that fell.

Jungkook’s hand reached across, wiping underneath your eyes, perching himself on the end of his bed. He used the tip of his thumb to trace over the top of her head, feeling along her arms, staring in awe of how tiny each digit of her hand was. Neither of you could look away from her, all expectation you had had been succeeded, unable to comprehend what you had just endured.

“Our little girl,” Jungkook whispered, leaving a kiss against the top of your head with his words. It had been the saying you’d had for her since the moment you found out it was a girl that you were expecting, and yet somehow neither of you could correlate that the little girl you’d wished for was finally in front of you both.

“Congratulations,” Jisoo spoke after a few moments, scribbling down on some papers attached to her clipboard. “I’ll give you both a second to adjust, you’re new parents after all.”

“We’re parents,” Jungkook muttered in a moment of disbelief, continuing to stare wide-eyed at your daughter, silently reiterating the promises he’d made to her most nights when he laid beside your bump, trying to help you get to sleep. Although she was still attached to you for a moment through the umbilical cord, his body was itching to get his first hold of his little girl, feel the body and the heart he was going to protect for the rest of his life. “Thank you,” he whispered across to you once he finally looked away from her, “it’s never going to be enough, but thank you for being so strong, and for being the best wife, and mum in the world.”

“How can you say that when I’ve only been a mum for five minutes?” You teased, bringing a smile to Jungkook’s face. His eyes rolled at the chuckle that followed your question, knowing if it wasn’t for your little one, he’d be attacking your side in an instant.

“I just know, call it instinct,” he assured you, “and I’m going to make sure that this little girl knows what a special mummy she’s got to. I’ll never let her take you for granted, just like I never will, ever again. I’m in your debt forever, nothing can make up for all of this.”

“You know, we can’t call her our little girl forever,” you hummed, noticing how quickly Jungkook’s eyes lit up at the mention of her name. Several had been exchanged between the two of you, and yet one always seemed to stand out to you both, almost as if it was just meant to be, her name was her destiny.

“Is it still the one that you want?” Jungkook asked, making sure you didn’t have any doubts.

“Just looking at her, she suits it,” you hummed, taking any excuse that you could to get a glance of your daughter. “Don’t you think, it’s perfect for her?”

Jungkook’s head nodded, leaning across your body to press a gentle kiss to the top of her head, treating her as if she was the most delicate thing in the world. As her name fell from his lips for the very first time, Jungkook knew you were right, it was perfect for her, and the perfect name to complete your family too.

“Can you believe we have her forever?” You asked him, brushing your thumb over the top of her head, “we don’t ever have to give this one back, or keep her only for a night. We never have to let her go, she’s ours, always.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever believe that I’ve been so blessed with the two of you,” he giggled in his confession, “every day, my little girl, and my incredible wife, I will love you.”

“She’ll have you wrapped around her finger in no time, I bet,” you laughed, “if she’s anything like you, we might as well enjoy the peace and quiet for now, because she’ll be causing trouble in no time.”

“I hope she takes after you,” Jungkook acknowledged, staring back at you, “everyone will fall in love with her, just like I did with you.”

“Do you still love me after I almost broke your hand?” You teased, staring across at his still slightly reddened hand.

“Y/N, I have never loved you more than I do right now, and I’ll love you more and more every day. You’ve given me the greatest gift, love just isn’t enough.”

“We love you too,” you smiled across to him, feeling his lips peck against yours.

“I’ll never tire of hearing that.”

---

Masterlist

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americxn · 3 years ago

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𝕚𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕒𝕞𝕖𝕤 𝕥𝕠 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕞𝕠𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕟 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕝𝕕/𝕥𝕖𝕔𝕙𝕟𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕘𝕪 (𝕛𝕡𝕞 𝕩 𝕘𝕟!𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣)

wordcount: 2k warnings: none :)

“James, have you seen my phone?” You ask, James’ attention snapping to where you were knelt on the edge of your shared bed, tossing aside cushions and lifting up the covers. “The phone is where it always is, dearest.” He offers, gesturing to the outdated corded telephone sat on a low table by the front door. “No, I mean my phone.” You mumble, pushing off the bed and beginning to rifle through the drawers of the dark oak nightstand positioned next to the pillows on your designated side. “Oh, you’re referring to that advanced device you always carry around?” “Yeah,” you answered vaguely, slamming the bottom drawer of the bedside table shut before straightening, your hands coming to rest thoughtfully on your hips. “I could’ve sworn I left it here but it’s gone.” As you looked around the room, James gave a small shrug, his attention falling back to the book rested in his lap. “Oh wait, I’m stupid - I left it in the bathroom.” You spoke more so to yourself, your words falling deaf on James’ ears, who was once again wholly concentrated on the novel clutched in his hands.

“Jameeees,” you sang whilst shouldering open the door to your shared suit. Your lover looked up from where he lounged in one of the plush armchairs positioned by the cold fireplace, open curiosity painting the pale planes of his face. You walked over to him, your hands hidden behind your back. Perching on his warm lap, you revealed the box you had been hiding with a flourish, presenting it to him with an enlivened flourish. He frowned softly in curious interest, taking the box from your hands and pulling the hastily tied ribbon undone. You watched, barely able to contain your excitement as he removed the lid of the box, carefully setting it aside before peering at the item that lay within. “It’s a phone!” You exclaimed, unable to help yourself as you reclaimed the box from his grasp, pulling out the phone and showing it to him. “Now you won’t have to sit and stare at your telephone like a lost puppy every time I leave the hotel.” Your words brought a gentle scowl to his brow, his pride bristling at your suggestion; it was true of course, but James was far too ‘busy’ to ever admit it. “You’ll be able to call or message me from any room in the hotel.” A content smile replaced his scowl in response to your words as he reached out, his fingers brushing against yours in a cold touch as he took the phone from you. “This looks like the phone that Sally has.” He mused, turning the sleek device over in his hand to examine it. You hummed your assent. “Yep, it’s the same type of phone. I thought that’d be best, she can teach you a bit more about how to use it. But look,” you snatched the phone from his fingers, swiping on the screen and opening the camera app “it takes pictures! Good quality too. And you can download any apps you like, you can get all your books on here, watch movies, read the news, literally anything. Social media too, I could make some accounts for you if you’d like...?” You words trailed away at the sight of the slightly lost look displayed on his face as he blinked slowly at you, overwhelmed with the abundance of information you had just thrown at him. “Sorry.” You smiled sheepishly. “They’re easy to use I promise. And you have plenty of time to figure it all out on your own. I’ve already put my contacts on there so you can get into contact with my whenever and wherever.” The arm he had slung around your lower back tightened, pulling you into the warmth of his chest as he pressed a lingering kiss to your temple. “Thank you, my love, it all seems extremely intriguing.”

“My love, could you pass me a towel please?” James spoke from his spot before the shower he had just climbed out of, water running off his skin and pooling at his feet; he had forgotten to bring a towel into the room with him and there were no spares occupying the bathroom. “Dearest?” He called again, beginning to shiver slightly, his damp hair plastered to his forehead, beads of rapidly cooling water dripping from the heavy strands at the nape of his neck and trickling down the pronounced planes of his back. “Y/n?” He tried once more, a slight shade of growing exasperation entering his tone. The hard tiles of the floor were cold under foot as his bare soles padded to the door; he swung it open halfway before peering around it, scanning the room for any sign of you. His eyes stilled on the bed where you lay splayed out on your back, your eyes open as you stared at the ceiling, mind clouded in deep thought. The music you had blaring through your airpods drowned out any other sound and so you didn’t notice the bathroom door open and didn’t pay any attention when James spoke your name even louder, studying you from around the door in confusion. Eventually he pushed the door open fully with an exasperated sigh, looking right at you pointedly as he crossed the room, pulling open his wardrobe and crouching to retrieve a clean cotton towel from the compartment at the bottom. Straightening, he slung the towel around his shoulders, pouting softly as he retreated back into the bathroom, seeing that you still hadn’t noticed him crossing the room mere feet from you, completely exposed.

“Shall we go down to the bar this evening?” James questioned, craning his neck to look at where you bumbled around the room, tidying up a bit and humming softly to yourself. He waited for several beats, expecting a response before frowning when you didn’t so much as deign to acknowledge his question. “Y/n, darling?” He threw up his hands in exasperation when you still didn’t pay him any heed, focused on gathering up the few stray items scattered across the vanity and crossing the room to deposit them in the drawers of the bathroom. “Y/n.” He repeated, standing from his chair and trailing you to the bathroom, lingering outside the door and awaiting your return. You gasped when you bumped into his chest upon stepping from the room, a hand rising to cover your heart in shock. “You scared me.” You laughed breathlessly, reaching up to take one of your headphones from your ear. “What are you doing?” You asked, brushing past him to continue tidying up the room. “I’ve been trying to catch your attention, you’ve been blatantly ignoring me.” He sounded genuinely hurt and so you turned, quickly hurrying back over to him whilst shaking your head. “No, I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry; I can’t hear you when I’m listening to music.” You explained, gesturing to the ear that still housed one of your airpods, the other clutched in your fingers. “Oh. Is that what you were doing the other day? Listening to music? Because I was calling out for your attention and you didn’t pay notice.” “Oh, I’m sorry.” you offered, feeling guilty at the slightly disheartened look creasing his features. “Yes.” He sighed. “You were laying on the bed and I thought that you were sleeping but your eyes were open. I was concerned.” You smiled softly at this, reaching up to brush the stray strands of hair away from his ear. “I’m sorry, just come and kick me or something next time, but look,” you brought your airpod up to his ear, carefully wiggling it into place. He instantly brought his shoulder up to his ear, his neck bending at an extreme angle as he tried to cringe away from the music blasting through it. You laughed openly at his reaction, watching as he reached up to rip it from his ear. He twirled it between his fingertips, his lips parted in disturbed confusion as he examined the small device carefully before passing it back to you with a shudder. “That is an invention from hell.” He stated seriously, looking on in disgust as you inserted it back into your own ear with a giggle.

“I’m just going to run down to reception,” you shouted over your shoulder, opening the front door to you and James’ shared suite. “Why?” His voice was muffled, emanating from the door to his study that branched off the main room. “There’s a microwave in the staff room behind the front desk, I’m hungry.” There was a pause as James considered your words, before responding with: “A what?” You smiled softly, your hand aching as it struggled to hold the heavy door open. “Don’t worry, I’ll only be five minutes.”

Ms Evers watched from where she stood beside the large mahogany dining table as you and James pushed open the door to your rooms, arm in arm, talking fondly to one another. Her eyebrow raised in silent reprovement, the table before her fully laid, food already piled high on the plates arranged at either end. “Sorry, we’re a bit late.” You offered with a small, guilty smile, untangling your arm from James’ and making your way over to your seat. “The food has long since gone cold.” She grumbled, scanning the table and the food she had so lovingly laid out, her hours of labour now seeming unsatisfactory at the sight of the meals having lost all warmth. “It’s okay.” You insisted. “I’m sure it’ll be just as delicious as usual.” Hazel took little comfort in your words but offered you a tentative smile regardless, stepping away from the table and readying to leave you and James to eat. “Or we can go and warm it all up again?” You suggested. She turned, regarding you with confused intrigue. “If I put it back in the oven, it will surely burn?” Shaking your head, you reached for your plate, picking it up before skirting around the table and taking James’ in your hand, too. “Come on.” You encouraged over your shoulder as you walked to the door. “Let me show you both the miracle that is a microwave.” They trailed you all the way to the ground floor, the full plates of food heavy weights in your hands as you pushed open the door behind the front reception desk with a foot, kicking it open to allow James and Ms Evers to follow you through. There was a small kitchenette in the corner of the room, Liz and Iris turning from their positions lounged opposite one another on the worn couches that made up the drab common area for the hotel staff. You greeted them warmly before taking the food to the microwave; you put James’ plate in first, stepping aside to allow him to watch his food go round and round in marvelling interest. He flinched slightly when the timer went off, allowing you to push past him to pull open the small door and fish out his plate. It was steaming hot as it placed it before James on the counter, replacing his plate with your own. You were too busy watched your own food get the life revived back into it that you didn’t notice when James picked up a fork that was sat on the side, using it to spear a piece of potato and bring it up to his mouth. He gasped in startled pain as it passed his lips. “No.” You scolded, batting the fork away from his mouth as he chewed fervently, the food too hot in his mouth as he struggled to swallow. “It’s way too hot.” You sighed, rubbing his shoulder as he finally managed to swallow the small piece of food, glaring down at the rest of his plate in vexation. “I’ll get you some water.”

taglist: @kitwalker02 @three-eyed-snail @forevercountess @kitwalkerangel @milly-louise @thecountessesglove @undeadcortez @kitwalker64 @samsassinparvismagna @xmaximoffic @divineruler @liandav @tatesweaterweather @evanmybeloved @tatelangdonsupremacist @ikkleroniekins @ananad1 @shlutnutt @sanni333 @mossybank @tatesimper

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years ago

Text

Hue and Cry XVIII

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), trauma, some elements untagged.

This is dark!medieval!Bucky Barnes x reader and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Synopsis: The reader and Zemo try to figure out what’s next.

Note: I actually think we’re closer to an end then the beginning. My goal is to finish this before moving onto anything else but that might be my original stuff so I might take a little break after this series to figure that out! Your patience and following along has meant the world to me. <3

Thanks to everyone and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

MASTERLIST

In the coming days, trunks were opened and stuffed with clothes, blankets, and miscellany. The servants did much of the work as when you were asked what to bring, you chose three plain dresses for you and several more outfits for Elina. Zemo tutted and ordered his staff to fill the chests.

There was no distinct urgency however as the horses were to be re-shoed before you set off and the baron seemed content to enjoy the summer sun with your daughter. He would sit with the two of you under the tree or take her on a walk of his sprawling green or dangle some ornament before her to reach for.

Your mind didn’t retreat from the prospect of your departure. He said a fortnight at longest, you had to leave before that. You worried about Elina and how she’d miss him and how she’d fare on the road. She was a healthy child but you couldn’t help but think of all that could go wrong.

The third day after the announcement of your looming trek, you sat on the balcony as Elina chewed on berries and Zemo sat with a book. The air was thick and damp from the heat but the sun was tamped out behind the gathering clouds. He wore his shirt untied at the top so that the fur of his chest peeked out and you wore a sleeveless cotton gown in a pale blue.

“Do you intend on negotiating? Truly?” you asked as your mind wandered.

He looked over the book and reached over to scoop up a slice of strawberry from Elina’s shirt and flicked it into the saucer, “what do you mean?”

“Are you going to try to seal the alliance they want or is it all a ruse?”

“My liege has given me leave to approach their proposal however I wish. If they present some benefits for us then yes, I should like to have peace but… they’ve not offered anything before that we couldn’t find elsewhere,” he shrugged and lowered the book, “are you concerned for them? The people who let you suffer as such?”

“It is still my homeland but that is not what I’m worried for. I wonder how long your patience can wear on,” you said.

“We have spoke on this, we both know--”

“Yes, I know, but… how long should I have left with my daughter?” you hissed.

“You think I mean to take you from her? Perhaps march you to your death?” he scowled.

“I know however this turns out, my place in it is perilous,” you retorted, “do not mock my fears.”

“I do not--” he took a breath and his sneer softened. He chuckled as he leaned forward, “you are stronger than before, you know that? You snap like a lioness. I thought you underestimated me but I see you only misjudge yourself.”

“You are vague with me so how can I trust--”

“I have seen you through your recovery, through a labour, and a life beyond that,” he said, “I only ask a little more for all that I’ve done.”

You sat back and cupped your chin. You looked at Elina, dark juices smeared around her lips. She was entirely undisturbed by the bickering of adults. You reached over and took her tiny, sticky hand.

You thought of Lord Barnes and if you should face him again. The idea made your blood run cold. Would he hate you? Would he still want you? You did not doubt he would have some cruelty left for you but as you were, scarred and hobbled, would it be different? And if he discovered your daughter, what then?

“He can never know about her,” you said softly and cautiously looked at the baron, “please, he can’t--”

“If he ever sees her, he will only know her to be mine but I have no intent upon my daughter being near that brute in her lifetime,” he growled. No little baroness but ‘my daughter’. You smiled at Elina and she squeezed your finger.

“I am grateful for all you’ve done for her. I know you didn’t have to--” your eyes strayed beyond the railing as some distant movement flurried beneath the sun. You squinted and leaned on the arm of your chair as you tried to see the specks along the horizon.

Zemo followed your gaze and stood. He went to the golden scope he kept on the balcony and put his eye to it as he adjusted the sights. He tilted it and stood stalk straight as if he’d been struck. The scope bobbled and he steadied it.

“Get her to your rooms,” he said, “lock the door and don’t make a sound.”

“What? What is it?”

“They are early,” he hit his open hand with a fist, “the letter… it could not be. The king must’ve assumed and sent the party prematurely.” He went to Elina and lifted her. He kissed her cheek and waved you up to your feet, “go on, take her. Keep her quiet as you can. I will house them on a lower floor but they cannot suspect you, understood?”

“How do you--”

“The banner, it is all I can make out,” he said as he grabbed your cane and rushed you back through his cool chambers, “you will lock the door and I will have Ulrich keep watch over the corridor.”

“You didn’t see who it was?” you asked as he opened the door and thrust you out into the hallway.

“You will know when I know,” he assured, “keep your candles unlit and draw the curtains.”

“My lord--”

“I did not plan for this,” he said as he marched you down the hall. You tried not to stumble as he still had your cane and you only had him to keep you from falling, “my lady, I do fear you will not make it to the Creek as we planned.”

He stopped at your door and you hugged Elina as you leaned against the wall. She was entirely untroubled by the sudden upheaval, ever a happy baby. “My cane,” you pointed to his hand as he gripped the silver topper, “please?”

“Oh, I-- Yes,” he handed it to you then reached to open your door, “keep that close…” he said, “just in case.”

“We’ll be as quiet as we can,” you assured him as you held Elina against your hip and limped with your can into the dim chamber.

“I will have Tess secret up some food before their arrival but you do not come out for anyone but me. I will knock,” he tapped a pattern on the door, “like so.”

“Yes, my lord,” you squeezed Elina as the nerves stormed inside of you.

He sighed and gripped the door as he leaned on it, “I only have a few hours to hide the evidence of you and all we’ve done to see you off. Even so, they will not suspect anything unless they are fed crumbs, yes?”

“I understand, my lord,” you stiffened and forced back the panic, “we will see what comes and do as we must,” you swayed Elina as she began to fuss, “for her.”

“For her,” he repeated, “now I must go.”

He closed the door and you set Elina down on the rug with the mouse Tess had sewn for her. You went to the door and twisted the latch into place. You turned back to watch your daughter as she tossed the toy and giggled. She pushed herself up to her feet, more certain everytime she stood. The time was passing much too quick.

🏰

You tried to distract yourself by playing with Elina and keeping her quiet. You worried however, the few times she made noise, that you would blow it all. When Tess brought the food, it was easier as your daughter grew hungry and restless. Once she had a proper meal in her, she was ready to lay down. She dozed beside you on the bed as you listened to the activity below.

First, you heard the horses through the window and the rattling carts and carriages. The voices were too distant to discern above a muffle and you weren’t so foolish as to peek out, even from so high up. You calmed yourself by watching Elina sleep but you knew you would not rest that night.

The sun sunk further behind the clouds and the evening approached with a dullness which forewarned of storms. You flinched at every noise, even floors below, and waited and waited and waited.

You had faith in Zemo, he was a great pretender. It was that very quality which kept you wary of him for so long.

When Elina stirred again, you quieted her cries with your tit but she wasn’t taking to your nipple as eagerly as before. It calmed her for a while but she was soon awake again. You let her explore the chamber but not far from you and kept her away from the clacking wooden blocks gifted her by the baron.

And then the knock came as the sky blackened and grey clouds rumbled above. The rhythm drew you to the latch and Zemo slipped through the door. He was quick to lock it again as you ambled without your cane, afraid to tap the floor too hard with it. Elina greeted him with a shrill cry but it was blanketed by the bluster of the rising chaos in the heavens.

“The storm will frighten her but it should also help hide her,” Zemo said plaintively, “I hope.”

“They are here and settled?” you asked.

“Yes, so they are,” he confirmed as he picked up Elina, “They are too concerned with themselves to worry about any dead women hidden above.”

He sat in the armchair as the girl played with his beard as she liked to do. He smiled and let her, poking out his tongue until she did the same. He bounced her on his lap and she gibbered noisily.

“They are floors down, you should be safe to exist but if she cries, you will have to be quick to quiet her,” he girded.

“Anyone we know?” you asked as you sat on the foot of the bed and rubbed your hip.

He was silent and kept his attention on Elina. He raised his hand and let her bend his fingers to her will. She grabbed onto his ring and twisted it around his knuckle.

“My lord, is there--”

“Yes,” he huffed at last. He kissed the child’s forehead and set her down to crawl across the carpet, though she didn’t go far before she was distracted by her stuffed mouse.

“Who is it?” you asked as you folded your hands.

He rubbed his forehead then pushed his head back, “it isn’t him,” he assured, “if they were callous enough to send him or he was fool enough to come, well, we wouldn’t be having this placid conversation.”

“Who?” you asked again.

“His dog, Lord Rogers,” Zemo spat, “I don’t know which is worse. The man was watching Melinda as a wolf would watch a deer. I don’t even know the girl has flowered yet and he would be sniffing at her skirts. Despicable.”

“Rogers?” you breathed and your chest knotted.

A roll of thunder boomed at that very moment and made you gasp. Elina stopped playing and her lip began to quiver. You slid off the bed to your knees and went to her and gathered her up. You cooed and hushed her and she clung to the collar of your dress. You watched her face as the fear retreated and she turned to watch the window flash. The terror turned to curiosity in an instant.

“Ha, look how brave she is,” he snickered.

You nodded, speechless still. Your nose tingled and your eyes burned. You were so overcome at the idea of that man being so close. You recalled that day in the forest, your singular mistake, then the scene in the carriage, and that on the staircase when Zemo himself had kept you from his perversions.

“My lady?” he said, “you look unsettled.”

“Take her,” you murmured then cleared your throat, “please, take Elina.”

He got up and took her from your arms. You pulled yourself up by the bedpost and leaned against it, your grip tightened around the carved wood. Your chest pattered in time with the downpour against the castle walls. You shook as you felt the scar along your face and those that led down beneath your dress. It hadn’t just been Barnes.

“Lady?” Zemo got closer as Elina babbled.

“I… can’t breathe,” you said and turned to fall back onto your rear, the mattress dipping beneath you as your fingers clung to the post, “I can’t…”

‘A bird, a bird, high above the cloud…’ he began to sing as much to Elina as you, a tune in his own tongue, ‘a wing, a wing, flaps without a sound…’ he rocked the girl but kept his eyes on you, ‘an angel, an angel, looking down on me. A blessing, a blessing, cast upon the lea…’

He reached with one hand and drew you up to your feet. He let you lean against him as he embraced you against your daughter and kept swaying in time to his voice and the sudden onslaught of the storm, ‘a lady, a lady, spinning at her wheel. A mother, a mother, her will as strong as steel…”

You clung to his sleeve and buried your face against the thin cotton. He kept singing until Elina was quiet and the rattling of your bones stilled. You were embarrassed at the sudden emotion which overcame you and the dampness on your cheeks. He carefully sat you back down and shushed.

The rain continued but the thunder passed. He moved carefully to lay Elina in her cot and stood as you hid your face behind your hand.

“I’m…” you uttered.

“No, that man. I remember that day,” he sat beside you and gripped his knees, “I know what he would’ve done and I am wise enough to know it was not the first he’d touched you.”

“It was long ago,” you said, “I shouldn’t be so… frail.”

“You are...strong. You must stay strong for her,” he sniffed and touched your elbow, “but you feel it now.”

“Feel what?” you blinked at him.

“The longing… for vengeance?”

You stared into his dark eyes and your chest continued to twist. Your spine went rigid and your jaw clenched. “I do,” you nodded and looked over at your daughter, “I feel it so very deeply.”

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