#I’ve been enjoying this type of Zelda

[smilesrobotlover]

Love at twilight? I’m curious about Zelda and her family, where’s the consort from?

Edmund is from Labrynna! So I took inspirations from Ralph and Queen Ambi. He has the pointy eyebrows, long eyelashes, and more ginger type hair. I need to work on his design more but I’m starting to have a soft spot for him. I just… I love mustaches man (Mario and Luigi have influenced my life fr).

Basically they’re struggling as a family. Zelda and Edmund were an arranged marriage, and though Zelda wants what Link and Midna have, she doesn’t know how. She doesn’t trust Edmund since all her life she’s been surrounded by kings taking control of everything. This part isn’t canon but her father stripped her mother of all power, zant usurped Midna, and Ganondorf tried to take over Hyrule. And even tho Edmund’s the second prince or Labrynna and is the prince consort, she’s very paranoid of him taking over. So she puts ALL responsibility on her own shoulders while disguising herself as Sheik to work with the resistance. Edmund mostly hangs out with Amber and is frustrated with the power dynamic cuz it’s not like he had a lot of power anyways, nor did people care about him. Edmund doesn’t get involved with Hyrule that much simply cuz Zelda won’t let him and cuz he doesn’t have a lot of respect for Hyrule, but they’ll learn and grow together. Zelda just… has trust issues, and Edmund doesn’t take it very well. Now Amber hangs out with her father but she’s mostly alone doing her own thing with tutors or maids or something, but she longs for a relationship with her mother. Overall their situation is complicated but it’s something I want to explore more, and hopefully they can learn to actually be a family a little more.

[maple-the-awesome]

Happy New Year! ||

Pairing: {Any} Link x Reader

Words: 923

Overview: It's New Years in Hyrule and you plan on finally living out one of the most famous holiday traditions. Here's a very last minute New Years piece that I decided to write within the last hour because I've done it for other characters before, so why can't it be Link's turn? Happy New Years everyone 🥳

Zelda Masterlist 🎉 Fandom Masterlist

You’re certain even the inhabitants of Death Mountain can hear the current celebrations taking place in Castle Town right now. If not, then the gorons of this kingdom must’ve invested in some pretty efficient earmuffs.

How anyone actually enjoys parties like this is beyond you. You can barely hear yourself think over the obnoxious shouting of the crowd, let alone enjoy the music being played by a band Hylia knows where. 

Is this street lined with cobble? Going off of what you remember from when you first arrived this morning, you think it is, but there’s no point in trying to confirm it now. It’s been forever since you’ve seen so many people in one spot, packed together like sardines that wear colorful hats and clothing, but you definitely don’t miss being tossed this way then that way by such obvious mobs. 

At least the night will be ending soon. Although you doubt that will put an end to this overwhelming party, it will give you the freedom to return to your comfortable room at the local inn which you PRAY is soundproof or else you’ll really be cranky tomorrow, but for now, you must blink away the sleep and continue on your path since there are far more important matters at hand than a good night’s sleep.

“Where are we going?” The question might as well be whispered during a storm. You don’t hear a word of it, your only hint towards its existence being the way Link’s lips move in the corner of your eyes. They’re turned upward in slight amusement as he follows after your swift pace. The only thing that’s keeping you from being separated into a wave of sweaty bodies is your tightly interlocked hands.

Around another corner, shoving past a drunk trio and into the first breath of fresh air you’ve had in the last four hours. It’s not necessarily ‘quiet’ with the festival only a few feet behind, but you suppose it will have to do. 

“What’s with that sour look?” Link pokes the corner of your lips, earning himself a swat and a misdirected glare; a consequence of your disappointed pout.

“...This isn’t what I had in mind.”

“And what is it that you had in mind?” He raises an eyebrow teasingly, his grin growing naturally when you cross your arms while tapping your foot like a frustrated rabbit.

“I-I don’t know. A garden filled with roses. A lone fountain sprouting glittering, moonlit water - Something more romantic than this!” You gesture ahead to the narrow alley which is filled with only discarded boxes and untouched by any moonlight due to its position between two tall buildings.

“At least it doesn’t smell,” Link points out, but your scrunch up nose tells him that his optimism isn’t helping much, so he wraps his arm around your waist, tugging you against his side where you stubbornly stand with mocked annoyance written all over your face.

“...I suppose it will have to do,” You eventually sigh, leaning your head against him yet keeping your arms crossed as emphasis that you don’t really care for this ‘compromise’. You just don’t want to venture back into that crowd nor do you have the time for it, “...A garden would’ve been much better, though.”

“Agreed.” 

“You must be wondering why I’ve dragged you here.”

“To escape further social interaction?”

“No - Well yes, but that was only an added benefit; a type of ‘kill two birds with one stone’ situation. What I really brought you here for is tradition,” You pivot your body so that you can stand in front of him. 

Almost automatically, he fixes both of his arms around you, keeping them low against your hips as he watches you straighten his tunic, “Tradition? What kind?”

You hum and take your time in answering him,  “...It’s tradition in my world to share a kiss at the stroke of midnight during the New Year. Supposedly it brings good luck or something like that. I’ve never done it with anyone before, but you seem like a decent fellow; I’ll take any good excuse to kiss you.”

“That so?” Link chuckles, gently lifting your chin to look up at him.

You merely nod. Out on the street, you can hear the crowd’s voices begin to fall in sync until they form one joyful rhythm and familiar countdown. Leaning closer, you let your breath fan Link’s lips, your flirtatious smirks a mirror of each other’s, “One kiss for a year of good luck. A worthwhile trade, wouldn’t you say?”

Moments ago, you were forced to walk through a town of drunk people who had forgotten how to behave in public, so it’s surprising how well they all suddenly know how to count: 10…9…8…7…6…5…4…

“Fool. You know I don’t need any reason to kiss you,” Link whispers, meeting his lips to yours which acts as the perfect distraction that pulls you away from the eruption of shouts and crackling fireworks that shake Castle Town to its core. What was once so difficult to drown out is officially mute against your ears as you wrap your arms over Link’s shoulders and allow him to dip you into the kiss that molds both of your smiles together.

"Does that make up for the lack of romantic settling?" He pulls away only enough to ask his question, each movement of his lips brushing yours.

"Very much so," With that, you pull him back in for another kiss, after all, who said you'd have to stop after midnight?

[erm-whatthefartscallop]

Caught

oc x Tenya Iida! Fyi I am happily okay with doing x readers! I just hope someone request something…

anywho, basically Iida coming home from work a bit earlier than he usually does and she is…having me time. He doesn’t know right away. Hope you enjoy!!!

cw: nsfw

“Oh! Tenya! I didn’t expect you to be home so…ah…early…” she blurted, ducking under the covers. It was a night like any other, but she was feeling rather…hot and bothered. Iida has been getting home later and later, and their sex life has been diminishing. It doesn’t normally bother her as it happens every once and a while—where one or the other is swamped with enough work to not be able to focus on their own sexual gratification or their partner. For Zelda, this one has been a particularly long rut. And she doesn’t like to ask, so she compromises by using a toy she uses for situations like these. Zelda is the type to prolong her sessions as much as she can, edging herself, limiting her time, turning down the vibrations then turning it to the highest setting. She had been going for a while, her little helper on her pearl at a low setting, keeping her legs shut as she rode out to another orgasm. She bit her lip as her hips rolled against the toy. She watched as her husband entered the room, closing her legs shut, but not having enough time to take out the toy. It was rather embarrassing to be caught doing something like this, but he didn’t notice…yet.

“Yes, I thought about you, and I felt like I haven’t seen you in a while. I’m sorry work has been hectic…” he mumbles, as he begins to undress from his work clothes. All she could do was nod her head as the toy automatically turned up by itself, allowing a faint buzzing sound to be made. She jolted a bit, biting her tongue to contain her voice. She sat up as she watched him, and he continued to talk. But she didn’t really listen as she was too focused on the immense pleasure she was feeling.

“How about you?”

“Wh-what?”

He laughed, “how was your day, is something wrong you seem a little off?”

“N-no of course not!” She laughed off, “my day was ah fine…” she held a hand against her mouth. This now prompted Iida to be a bit concerned. Putting a hand to her forehead,

“Are you sure you’re feeling alright, Zelda?.” He said with worry. She shook her head.

“I’m fine!” She blurted, she let out an exhale as the vibration went back to low. She was amazed with herself how she is taking this like a champ. He raised an eyebrow, 

“I’ll take your word for it…” he sighed, now removing his button down, tossing it into the hamper. His hand moved to his belt. She watched over her book that she had in hand. Another thing she liked to do while…doing the do was to read or be on her phone. Any multitasking really, it felt a reward and helped her focus on anything BUT her pleasure, to prolong the orgasm. The way Iida kept talking, and his hand lingering on his belt, taking it off painfully slow. It was driving her nuts. All she could do was watch, and bite her lip in secrecy. She was a little annoyed at the fact that he still hasn’t figured it out and essentially unknowingly teasing her. She shut her eyes and closed her legs tightly as the vibration turned up again. Letting out shaky exhales, as she tried not to squirm under the sheets. 

He noticed. The way she was hiding behind the book, or that she didn’t greet him how she usually did. The insistent buzzing. Her contained moans. Her eyes tracing his every move. He noticed. Granted it did take him a while, but it excited him to know that she would do something like this, and wondered if she found it exciting to be caught in something so taboo. “I’ve been talking a lot, and you haven’t said a word” he stated.

“Well, I just like listening…” she stammered. He hummed.

“Or is it that you are bad at multitasking?” he said rather bluntly.

“Wh-what are you talking about!” She said with a red face. He made a face. One that she found rather annoying because it is a face he makes when he tries to prove a point. A stupid little grin is what she calls it. 

He stood next to her bedside, taking the book from her hand, then slowly pulling the sheet off. All she could do was watch. He maintained eye contact with her, she looked up at him. A tinge of need, relief, but mostly desire. He narrowed his eyes down to her tightly shut legs, and the now damp spot on the bed. It wasn’t supposed to go on for this long, she felt embarrassed being caught in such a state—but the way he looked at her, the way he studied her form. She knew it excited him. He looked back up at her, his hand tracing her leg up to her thigh. Only to grip onto to spread her legs apart. She let out a wince as his hand moved to her inner thigh. His eyes moving down yet again to view the sight in front of him. His poor wife, having to endure such torture. “I wonder…” his voice low, filled with much craving, an appetite for her. It was intoxicating. Invigorating.

 “How much longer can you last?” 

[powdermelonkeg]

I’ve noticed that a lot of people have some problems with the Totk narrative and was wondering what you thought about it! I’m personally pretty neutral but I can see why people don’t like it. Have a wonderful day!

Okay so controversial opinion here from me:

TotK > BotW

WITH A CAVEAT

I enjoy games IMMENSELY more when I'm not spoiled on them. Skyrim mesmerized me because I flat out was not expecting an actual execution in the first five minutes. I love exploring things for myself.

I went into TotK with ZERO proper spoilers, on purpose. All I had was my own speculation from my trailer breakdowns, and the barest glimpse of Sonia from a leak. The world fascinated me. The physics engine was insanely fun to play with. I got super excited with the return of caves and dozens of collectables. I loved discovering new recipes. I LIVED in the Depths. And the slow horror of figuring out what exactly Zelda did to herself—I saw Tear 3, felt a sinking feeling of dread, rushed into the Depths of the castle to break down that last mural, then panicked as I raced around Hyrule trying to get the rest of the memories. I got the final memory, and I stood on top of Zelda's head for half an hour in shock.

BotW, on the other hand, I spoiled myself on, and was let down by in terms of what I expected out of it. I think the story would have captivated me had I stayed off of Youtube and actually bought the game (was broke at the time, didn't get it until 2019) and experienced it as intended. But I KNEW all the cutscenes, so I didn't have a drive to chase them. Which left the mechanics of the game on their own for me to get used to; I liked cooking, I loved getting a house. I hated how few enemy types there were, I missed my pieces of heart and secret caves and collectables. It's a secret to everybody? Wrong. 85000 shrines.

I started Zelda with Twilight Princess. That's been the bar for me since the beginning. If lighting two unlit torches doesn't give me a secret chest, or beating a challenging minigame doesn't give me a better quiver, it doesn't feel like Zelda to me.

Everything in BotW felt samey because I'd taken the narrative out of its natural habitat and experienced it as a movie rather than as a game, and the most variation enemies really had was a color or elemental difference. No Redeads in the desert, no Toadpoli in the lake, no Freezards in the ice. Also the bosses had no individuality.

Now, I 100% understand why people who love BotW don't love TotK. A lot of what was set up in BotW was undercut in favor of telling the story of Ocarina of Time again. There's no moving past the cycle like BotW implied there would be, and the refusal of the devs to so much as show the ruins of the last game's pivotal pieces feels like they didn't want to commit to anything. It's like if Four Swords and Four Swords Adventures were said to be direct sequels; they've got the same flavor, the same mechanics, but why does NOTHING have continuity?

(I've kind of microdosed on this frustration myself in regards to the timeline; all that effort to say BotW was at the end of all three timelines and do away with the mess they released in Hyrule Historia, and they add Zonai tech in on top of the Sheikah tech with no continuity??? Rauru and Sonia vs Skyward Zel??? Rito existed at the dawn of time. What)

As a continuation of BotW's narrative, it fails. Not egregiously enough for fans to be able to disconnect them and call them their own stories, but badly enough that the overall story feels like it was meant to be two, not one. That's a frustrating point to be in; too much is intertwined between them to break them off and create for them separately, but it's also not intertwined enough that you can't see that it's fraying at the edges.

Anyways...

I liked it. A lot. I think the whole dragon plotline and worldbuilding is fascinating. I have my gripes with dialogue, as one always does with Nintendo games, but you know.

[the-depths-au]

FAQ

*this post continues heavy totk spoilers

How did it start?

A lot of people started posting some really cool art of a TotK ending where Zelda returns as a hybrid dragon creature thing. I saw a few that called it a “bad” ending and I noticed she was often portrayed with dominantly human-features just like, with horns or a tail, or the purple eyes, etc. I love to play video games(clearly) and I enjoy the challenge of seeing various endings, not just “secret endings” (think Heavy Rain, Until Dawn, The Witcher 3, Drakengard- anyone else play this?) I got to thinking about how her coming back didn’t really like a true “bad ending”. To me, a bad ending, really, would be one in which she didn’t get to magically, miraculously come back in any form. A bad ending to me would be Mineru’s warning held true. And in doing so, it would become The Legend of Zelda because she becomes the stuff of myths. Of true Legend. Fulfilling destiny (botw-era and the series as a whole). My brain sort of took off from there regarding the implications this would have on Hyrule and specially, our boy Link.

How could you! A Bad ending? Is this story at least hurt and eventual comfort??? Does it have a happy ending??

I could tag this hurt and comfort, but usually people who read these types of stories have certain expectations of what “comfort” is (and that’s okay!). Same with a “happy” ending. I don’t need stories to be wrap up in a bow with warmth to enjoy them. Honestly, some of the stories that have touched me the most over the years have had “sad” endings/negative character arcs/tragedy. That being said, I don’t particularly enjoy pure whump, either. What I feel is most important and what I am to do with this story, is to make any suffering meaningful. With purpose. And hopefully- maybe- you’ll see the “comfort” that is possible even in these types of stories.

Wait! So Zelda remains a dragon?

Yes. They defeat the demon dragon. Rauru and Sonia appear in a silent thanks, then they disappear and Link falls from the sky alone into the water. The Light Dragon continues along in her flight above him.

Link is also the only one who can see/has ever seen the Light Dragon.

Are there any other major changes from TotK?

It follows the game pretty closely. It’s just hard to say exactly what is in this story from TotK because there is just so much. In BotW, I headcanon Link took his time. He doesn’t remember anything. He is alone, lost, and the world is a vast, broken place. Therefore, it is plausible/ realistic in my head for all the side questions to be done prior to the ending being reached. In TotK, especially with the headcanon he and Zelda were together in the time between BotW and TotK, I had a hard time imagining Link would waste much time on anything unnecessary to save Zelda. So, with this in mind, I’ve had to justify the side questions to include in the story. Link’s journey is a bit different than my own. Whereas I actually spent 80% of my playthrough exploring the depths, this Link only went down when necessary. Meaning many of the lightroots have not been unlocked and he only has part of the armor of the depths. In the Linktober and the early concept, he has the entire set but this has been changed for the main comic.

How far after the events of TotK does this take place?

Five years.

Is it completely planned out?

Yes. I have a complete rough story outline done. It’s 17 chapters. I am anticipating some editing as I go, but regardless, it’s a big project. A huge shout out to @zeldaelmo and @fioreofthemarch for helping me get the story set. They are both phenomenal writers for the LoZ fandom so be sure to check them out!

What happened to the comic?

I made the decision to tell this story (initially) in writing. I have a very specific style in mind for this story as a full comic and honestly, I just don't feel like my artistic ability and overall proficiency is where I want it to be at this time. I'm still learning! I will be continuing to post art, concept art, and some comic panels here as I go and eventually, I would love to adapt the story into a full comic, but for now, I'll be telling the main story in writing.

How long have you been drawing?

I’ve been drawing all my life. Just for fun, although I took a few classes in school. Digitally, self-taught, since fall 2022. Still very new to this with lots to learn! I have a minor in creative writing and feel much more confident and comfortable with that.

Feel free to send me a DM with questions anytime! I plan to update this periodically.

Last updated 2/26/24

[casual-praxis]

“The radiance is so lovely it makes you sick.”

It be the Green one!! Took me long enough but I’ve finally completed the whole set! Now I can work on more character interaction doodles! I have several with Green specifically so I needed his design done like, three days ago lmao.

He takes a lot of inspiration from Rad Slimes, as you might can tell, but I’m torn on trying to work in some Dervish (because wind alignment) or some other slime at the moment. He’s just, very green.

I’ve mentioned he was irradiated a few times so hopefully that makes more sense now haha.

Onward to the bonus information!

+ As mentioned in Blue's post, Green and him were the last to arrive at the ranch, about a year after Red did give or take. While excited about the prospect of adventure and ranching cute slimes, Green was actually a little less confident in his footing within the group than he might appear.

He was mostly content to stay out of the other's way unless they wanted him there, and spent a lot of his time early on learning the ropes so he could pull his weight better (and be prepared when it was time to move to a solo ranch, which never actually happened).

+ Green started to learn the Ranch Exchange process after noticing it was something the others either avoided or rarely used. It was an easy way to acquire resources and build connections, so Green was immediately interested in that aspect. If he couldn't locate something himself, he would ask the others for help, or if they had any extra to spare, promising to split rewards with them if so.

They ended up building a group silo to store all their miscellaneous goods that could be traded, and Green was left to manage it since it was his idea (Blue helps organize, though he'd deny it being because he wants to). This was about the point where everyone realized Green's main skills lay in the form of management, social links, and general awareness.

+ He's an ambivert through and through. He can blend with almost any type of personality, though his social skills are a bit of a roulette day to day. As the main source of internal and external communication, Green keeps up with quite a lot, but enjoys it for the most part.

Sure, he has a request due in three hours and he doesn't know where Vio said Mosaic Slimes vibed at (they really need to start naming the Desert locations), but also Red wanted him to find a painted hen-hen for him while in the area and Blue is grumbling about sand, and now Shadow is pinging him--yeah, he could use a break after this.

+ Green doesn't have a favorite slime per se, but after Shadow designs his outfit theme around Rad Slimes, he does find he gravitates towards them more often. However, this affinity didn't stop him from picking up trace amounts of Rad Slime radiation, but oh well. All the others have odd slime-related quirks now too, at least he doesn't feel left out.

+ Next to Red, Green is the go-to for comfort. He doesn't really like physical contact the way the others do, but it's alright from time to time, especially if it's what one of the others needs to calm down at the moment. He wants them to know they aren't alone, and that he cares for them so much.

Sometimes he's the one in need of comfort, and the others will gladly return his love tenfold.

+ He uses the extra corral he has in his mini-Moss Blanket zone to house stray slimes for the others if need be (one at a time, of course). Usually it's something for either Red or Vio, but every now and again Shadow will need to store a slime temporarily for a video, and this extra plot is the ideal place to do it. Green doesn't mind.

+ He's pen pals with Zelda, a childhood friend who was almost something more. The two of them are content to just stay friends, especially with such a large distance between them now, but they're comfortable enough to joke about what could have been. Zelda also got front-row seats to Green's abundant gay pinning for the others in his letters, some gems beings:

"Zel, I mean absolutely no offense, but today I saw a Phosphor Slime land directly in Red's arms and I think it may have been the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life. He's so tiny, you don't understand--he almost can't hold all of it but he tries anyway. His smile is so bright, just like a firefly, Zel. I don't think I can take this, I'm gonna die."

"Speaking of flirting, I think Vio's trying to kill me with it. I thought Shadow was joking when he said Vio was worse, but holy shit, Zel. I was just hanging out with him in his lab, sitting on a table, when he decides to walk over and stand between my legs to get something behind me I guess. And when I ask him what he's doing, he just says, in complete monotone, "chemists do it on the table periodically," and then just walks away??"

"Excuse my gay on main, but Blue's shirt being sleeveless is just unfair. I need to send you a picture or something, I don't think words can describe this emotion I am feeling."

"Today Shadow sat in my lap and none of these thoughts are in the bible."

+ Appears composed, is very much not.

[echoesofwisdomcountup]

189 Days since Tears of the Kingdom Released. It’s opinion time, yay. It’s been a bit since I’ve finished the main story of TOTK and with some distance I gotta say, while there were many things I did like, my main complaint is the bare bones story. I haven’t found an explanation for why the Sheikah tech disappeared and I didn’t really get to learn and bond more with the new champions as much as I would’ve liked too. I love them and I know them from BOTW but I would have appreciated more writing for their characters. Plus, while I enjoyed the sense of community fostered by the NPCs helping you out, I also wished there were more story arcs for the side characters. Admittedly, I haven’t 100% finished everything there is in Totk yet but still. Yes the game play was fun and yes the story and themes with Zelda made me cry but the story overall left me with this vague feeling that it was unfinished. Something was missing. I’m hoping that if they continue with open world type Zelda games, they balance the story aspect better.

[punishandenslavesuckers]

Heyoo tears of the kingdom next month so I’ve been replaying botw and re reading my fav botw fic, Interim. Thank you for this story, reading it now is like tracing the well worn and loved groves of an old backyard tree. How did you come up with/where did you draw from canon Draga/Geurdo culture’s understanding and mechanics around magic? The simplicity and perfection of blood, bone, and breath paralleling earth, wind, and water. The sea of lives?? Hell yeah. I hope there’s something tasty for you at the feast of totk.

Hello! Answering all these far too late now that TOTK is here.

I honestly didn't draw inspo from anything specific. I think I've read lots of posts, stories, etc that have elemental ties to magic. Like there was a vampire book called Sunshine by Robin Mckinley where a particular character's main totem/type of magic was worked through sun. Like she draw power from the day itself to do magic. The elemental magic types came from I thiiiiink.

That book was probably the biggest inspiration for the VIBE of the magic, how I wanted it to feel and come across. Highly recommend. It's a formative read for me and if you read it, you'll see its influences in my writing for sure.

Draga's stuff I vaguely took from some of Dune media over the years. The idea that power from the desert and time can make you insane and is very, very dangerous was definitely something I wanted to bring to the front of his story. His power has ties to the demonic and to risk etc and I wanted it to feel like he was just barely in control

Link's magic too, wild magic, is VAAAAAAGUELY tied to the Tamora Peirce books I read back in the day about wild magic, but I genuinely dont remember anything beyond the name. I just knew Link too was afflicted by the same dangers as Draga is -- the connection to past lives and time being a threat to sanity and self. Mostly because Link's internal suffering is not well touched on in most games so I wanted to make the stakes for him clear. He's a little eldritch sometimes.

So the sea of lives is something both he and Draga understand and commiserate about. Zelda bears it too, but because she's part divine, some of the harshness is gentled. Her mind is made to handle it while Link and Draga - wholly human - are not really.

Anyway, hope you enjoy TOTK

[blackknightax]

So i promised I’d do a franchise that required research. Believe it or not, that franchise is, Minecraft! Until i got married to my wife I had actively avoided playing Minecraft. It just wasn’t for me, i used to even be the type of person who make fun of people who play Minecraft. Now, it’s just a game is a game is a game. I don’t know why i didn’t like Minecraft back then, but I can tell you I don’t super enjoy it now. I need, direction in my games. I like games where you just hang out and do stuff as much as the next game but i need the game to occasionally give me SOME kind of direction. That being said let’s get to business.

Minecraft is a game where it’s hard to justify giving move sets to characters that aren’t similar in SOME way to Steve. That’s probably part of why Steve is also Alex, Zombie and Enderman. Now this would not have required any research whatsoever if Enderman had not been a part of Steve. I would have simply chosen the Enderman and made a move set about teleportation and such. But NOOOOOOOOOO, Steve IS enderman. Mumble grumble.That being said. I do have a great character choice either way. One who I genuinely really like and think it’ll be super fun. For this purpose I’ve chosen

The Warden! I know the Warden isn’t exactly a “character” it’s a force of nature. BUT I like the warden so it gets to be a character today! Just cuz I said so! That said, the warden is a beast creature that shows up in a biome known as the deep dark. It is summoned blocks called Sculk blocks. These blocks react to noise and summon the Warden to kill you. The warden however is a unique mob who is actually blind, so it doesn’t react when it sees you, but when it HEARS, or SMELLS you. It’s such a cool mob and mechanic. As you can tell i learned a lot about how this creature works to make this post. For further proof, I thought about trying to find a way to implement his rage mechanic. But the rage mechanic mostly is a self perpetuating mechanic that makes the warden work harder to find you and get to you and crush you. So instead, the smash built in Rage mechanic boosts two stats for the Warden instead of one, the warden gets faster as you damage him, not just stronger.

For his Neutral B it will fire it’s sonic boom attack. Like in Minecraft it ignores all walls and pierces all enemies. It is a large projectile, like, Samus charged shot big. It fires it slowly to make up for the large damage it does.

For his Up B it burrows into a ground that suddenly appears if used in the air, it then reappears/re-emerges from Sculk blocks that appear away form it. Think Zelda’s up B where he’s disappears and reappears somewhere else. It does damage both while going down and coming up. If it hits at the bottom of the burrowing animation it meteor smashes.

For Side B it charges forward, it can be redirected twice. Think Hulk’s gamma charge from MVC or quick attack from Pikachu but as a side B instead of an up, therefore more like gamma charge. As rage builds the distance this move goes increases.

For Down B it performs a roar that causes a stun to the enemy directly in front of it. Think Confusion from Mewtwo. This is meant to emulate the effect that the Warden causes players to experience darkness debuff.

In case it’s not obvious already, the warden is a heavy character like Bowser and K Rool and Dedede, but with this version of the rage mechanic the warden can reach the speeds it reaches in Minecraft itself. The warden is great creature to use as a character. I understand if people think there are better choices. I plan to keep going with this series and please keep asking me questions. It’s been fun to answer them.

[lucky-clover-gazette]

Shadow shakes his head. “You’re doing perfectly. I just don’t want this to be a bad memory for you.” Dreaming Vio startles at the comment. Is this a bad memory? He doesn’t think so, but his definition of ‘bad’ is far from conventional. That’s what months of corruption does to a person, he supposes. Shadow runs his hands down Vio’s waist and hips as the blonde pushes him against the headboard. Vio kisses him deep, almost as if sucking poison from a wound. Shadow’s eye widen as he watches strange patterns appear on his own skin. Dark purple veins run down his arms and neck, almost resembling the complex root system of a tree. They seem to almost be alive, the lines pulsing as Shadow kisses Vio harder. Vio whimpers, but doesn’t let go. The lines transfer from one body to another, tendrils of gloom creeping their way beneath the thin fabric of his blouse. It appears to weaken him further at first, and he loses the energy to kiss Shadow hard. He falls into the other man’s arms, his body jerking around every three seconds as if taking prolonged damage from the direct exposure.

— —

I think one of my favorite things about your writing is how you take so many concepts from other games in the Zelda series (like the gloom or the addition of the Hero’s Shade in this fic specifically) and use the elements given through canon but also add your own twist. I’m mostly curious what inspires you to use those things, and also how much more complex the systems might be than what we get from reading the character’s perspectives. I also just really like this scene and the concept of this fic as a whole; it’s definitely one of my most favorite things I’ve read :D (Also I’ve been meaning to ask if there’s any specific songs you’d tie to scenes in any of your fics or music you listen to while writing in general).

Anyways thank you! Hope you're having a good day!

thank you so much! i always appreciate your comments.

with other zelda things, it’s really kind of connected to my overall experience with the series. loz was an iceberg for me, like i started with botw, got really into it, started watching other people play the other games, read the twilight princess manga, got a wii u to play the oldies, and eventually just kinda randomly picked up the four swords manga almost a year ago. so i already had a lot of love for this series before writing four swords fic, and a lot of thoughts about the games. esp bc it’s not a nostalgia thing for me, i’ve approached zelda as an adult, i think my analysis of and connection to the media has been pretty “deep” or whatever. these stories mean a lot to me, and i’ve always been someone to take stories and their importance in my life seriously. botw in particular was a very healing experience for me at the time that i played it. that game holds a lot of philosophical and emotional meaning to me, and i get why others may not enjoy it, but as someone who has now played the other games, i still think it’s a master piece. my favorite game of all time, honestly, and totk was such a gift. it did so much right for me. it’s been delightful experiencing the series how i have.

i don’t love all of the choices made in terms of story and themes in loz, but there is a LOT to play with in fic. esp bc it’s a reincarnation type series, i don’t give a shit about the timeline, i just want to draw parallels and do clever interesting things. so a lot of the time i’ll have a vague idea of what i want to do with a story, and there will be a way to make connections, if only for my own enjoyment. i’m a strong believer that all art is derivative, but like, if you know the author loves it and is having fun, that only makes it better. it’s hard to pinpoint what i thought of and what was put in my mind by other things in the series, and honestly, i’m totally cool with that :)

i want to tread lightly talking about the gloom and corruption stuff in that specific fic because spoilers buuuuut the core concept of that part was just for it to be vaguely toxic and kinda … yknow… and i liked the idea of gloom/gloom hands being this confused force of harm and affection. honestly this whole fic is just me putting some very personal feelings and experiences on blast, and it’s been exhausting to write. i actually scrapped the final chapter and i’m rewriting it now, for the best!

hmmm i do connect my writing a lot to music but i think (?) you’ve seen my vidow playlist already! for the final chapter i’m doing a little bit of a tone shift and i’ve been listening a ton to the bottoms (movie) soundtrack. going for something more lively and active and cinematic, instead of two people being miserable. inserting a little dark humor too, closer to the og corruption but it’s chill au. while working on earlier chapters of corruption but it’s unchill i associated it with “eyes half open” by cinders, and (TOTK SPOILERS) i listened to the totk memory ost of rauru sealing ganon pretty much the entire time i wrote the chapter where vio kills green. been listening a lot to “pain” by king princess (also in bottoms, that movie is living rent free in my brain rn) while working on the final chapter.

hope this answers your questions! thanks so much for reading <3

[abbzworld]

Writing commissions

Hello everyone! As some of you know, I’ve been writing fanfiction for a long time now, with accounts on both Archive Of Our Own  and Fanfiction.net. I have also dipped my toe into original fiction writing (just not as often as fanfiction) and as such, I also have a FictionPress account. And I figured that since I enjoy writing so much that maybe I could make some money off of my stories. And that's why I am now offering up some original fiction and fanfiction commissions! The info for both will be under separate sections below. But first, here are some general rules and guidelines before we begin: 1. I don’t want you to send me anything NSFW. Just stick to PG-13 for a rating, alright? 2. The longer the story you want me to write, the longer it’ll take for me to finish it, so just keep that in mind. It could take anywhere from a few days to a couple months. If you don’t like that, don’t commission me. 3. I’m only going to take three commissions at a time. Anything more than that and I’ll overwhelm myself. 4. Your commission can't be cancelled after I've finished the first draft. 5. Anything that you don't specify in your commission information, I can make up. 6. Please only ask for one commission at a time! This allows other people to commission me without one person taking up all three slots. 7. Please note that I will NOT write about incest, pedophilia, explicit abuse or ANYTHING of that sort! ---- Fanfiction Commissions Before we get started, let me make it perfectly clear off the bat that I will NOT write for a ship/fandom that I either don’t like (i.e. a NOTP) or know nothing about (i.e. Harry Potter). I will only take commissions that I can comfortably write! If you're unsure as to what I will write outside of what I've listed below, just ask. Types of Commissions NOTE: My currency is in the Canadian dollar. So keep that in mind if your currency is different. Also, my overall price is 1 cent per word (eg. 100 words is $1 and 500 words is $5, etc.) Drabbles (anything less than 1k words) - Maximum price is $9.99 CAD These will be the stories that’ll hopefully be done quicker than the others since they’re the shortest in terms of words. Short Oneshot (between 1-3k words) - Maximum price is $30 These might take me a little while depending on inspiration, my schedule and what you want me to do. Long Oneshot (between 3-5k words) - Maximum price is $50 These will probably be the toughest ones to write since they’re longer and I have to make sure that they’re the proper length and I don’t go overboard. So don’t overload me with them, okay? Surprise Story (between 1-8k words) - Maximum price is $75 Provide me with one of your artworks, and I'll write a story about it. Do's and Don'ts What I do/am willing to write OC’s aka Original Characters (depending on where they’re from and who they are so again, if you're unsure, just ask) Fandoms: • Paper Mario (mainly TTYD and SPM) • Naruto • Doctor Who • Gravity Falls • Harvest Moon (mainly AWL and it’s different versions) • Legend of Zelda (mainly WW, TP, SS and BOTW) • Bugsnax Romantic ships: • Beldam/Doopliss, Koops/Vivian, Bobbery/Scarlette & Count Bleck or Blumiere/Tippi or Lady Timpani (Paper Mario) • Naruto/Hinata & Shikamaru/Temari (Naruto) • Twelve/Missy, Twelve/Clara, Missy/Clara, Twelve/Missy/Clara, Twelve/Davros (yes, you read that right), Third Doctor/Delgado Master & Sally Sparrow/Larry Nightingale (Doctor Who) • Dipper/Pacifica (Gravity Falls) • Link/Zelda (mainly from Skyward Sword and Breath of the Wild) & Link/Midna (Legend of Zelda) • Celia/Marlin (Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life) • Filbo/Buddy, Snorpy/Chandlo, Lizbert/Eggabell and Wiggle/Cromdo (don’t judge…) (Bugsnax) Platonic ships: • Dipper and Wendy (Gravity Falls) • Shelda and Floofty (Bugsnax) Characters: • Gaara (Naruto) • Missy, Twelfth Doctor, Clara and Sutekh (Doctor Who) NOTE: I AM willing to write outside of these ships and characters, but within reason. Feel free to ask me about something not listed here, but there's NO guarantee that I'll write it for you. Especially if it's a NOTP (i.e. romantic and/or sexual Sasuke/Itachi, romantic and/or sexual Hidan/Shikamaru, etc.) or just someone that I’m not used to writing yet. (i.e. Stanley Pines) Genres: • Adventure • Angst • Drama • Family/friendship • Hurt/comfort • Romance What I don't write Multi-chapter stories as I have bad luck with trying to finish those, no matter the length. Mature content aka NSFW Fanfiction involving real people Genres: • Biographies • Crime • Fantasy • Horror • Humor/parody • Poetry • Some sci-fi • Supernatural • Western ---- Original fiction commissions Here are some rules and guidelines specifically for my original fiction commissions: 1. My price is 2 cents per word, since writing original fiction is generally more difficult then writing fanfiction. So in other words, just multiple the final word count by .02 and you'll have the price to pay me. 2. My minimum word count for an original story is 100 words (which would be $2) and my maximum is 2000 words (which would be $40). I don't have too much experience writing original stories yet, so that's why my limit is 2000 words. 3. Again, no multi-chaptered stories! It would be too tough on me. Otherwise than, my previously mentioned rules and guidelines apply as well as my do's and don'ts that I mentioned under "Fanfiction commissions". So as long as you follow them and communicate effectively with me about what you do and don't want, I'll be happy to write for you. ---- Other information DISCLAIMER: I have the right to refuse a commission without explanation. How to commission me Send me a chat message or non anonymous ask containing the following information: • Type of commission (i.e. will it be a fanfiction or an original story? What minimum and/or maximum word count do you want? Etc.) • Genre(s) of the story • Which fandom the story is in (for fanfiction commissions) • Any and all characters involved, including OC's • The plot you want • Extra information/specific details you want me to know • Paying by points or by PayPal? You can also contact me on either Discord (abbie26) or DeviantART (found here) with the information.

Closing

Anyways, that should be enough for now. And if you have any other questions that aren’t answered above, be sure to ask me so I can clear it up.

Peace off!

[lordsooga]

Tagged by @arkon-z !!! Thank you!!

3 ships: Kohga and Sooga, OBVIOUSLY. They got me with the carefree and goofy but powerful leader and his fiercely stoic, loyal, and competent second in command. Come on, Master “except for me of course!” Kohga refusing to leave Sooga even after they just watched Astor pull the life out of all his other soldiers. Sooga’s “Then in that case, I’ll protect you even if it costs me my life.” COME ON!!!!!!

Revalink. Look, they work so well together. They complement each other. They have so much in common. They don’t know that about each other. They would change each other for the better. There is no way Revali just hates Link or is just jealous of him, he would NOT be out there trying So hard to get Link to acknowledge him.

We’ll do one non-zelda ship. As a treat. 

Fuck it. It’s Bowuigi. They GOT ME okay, I like big monsters with tiny soft men!!!!!

First ship: Fuck. Good question. I remember kinda liking OoT link and zelda/link and sheik when I played as a kid??? It was mostly as friends, though. I wasn’t super into shipping when I was a kid. I think i shipped two of those creatures in drawn to life, though lmao

Last song: idk why but i havent listened to any music in daysss. all i can think of is Spillways

Last movie: Oh my god.........it was morbius

Currently reading: It has been a hot minute since ive read a real book 💀 the current fics im reading, though, are @/zariyari’s ghiralink fic Now Get Us Out of Here which i am enjoying a lot ehehe. I’m also in the middle of a Majima/Kiryu one. I’m eagerly awaiting more to @/ginneke’s revalink fic A Seed of Song, and, god damn it, soon I’m gonna start @/heleentje’s Moonlight fic.

Also special mentions to @/ghirahimbo’s fics Blind, But Now and Pinesong which i’ve been meaning to read forever now

Currently watching: I’m waiting for all my current favorite shows to make new episodes T__T so right now im trying to finally finish the new JoJo season

Currently consuming: A delicious udon dish

Tagging (if you feel like it, no pressure!!): I’ve not done one of these on this account before :0 so im not sure who likes participating in these types of things. But @jaybirdsdelight @insanespiders @theobergmynt @ginneke @heleentje @zariyari @chaozrael if any of yall would like to!

[thescrapbookingscientist]

Biweekly Media Roundup

- Trigun (Anime) - The current trend in the fandom is to draw Knives as a McDonalds worker to “Make his desire to kill all of humanity reasonable as a customer service employee” which. Hilarious, I love people.

- Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Video Game) - Obviously I’ve been having a blast with this, I love exploring the sky islands and caves, the Zonai and new monster designs are awesome, and the memes of messing with the Koroks and creating batshit machines have been wonderful. My main complaint so far is how they handle the NPCs memory of Link, I’d be fine with the main ones remembering him and the rest having a Tony Hawk-esque knowledge of Link without realizing he was in front of them, but it’s kind of sad to run into NPCs that Link definitely helped in the first game only to have them forget him - Like the people of Tarry Town and Hateno village. Ganon’s design is incredible though, amazing job there.

- Monster High (Cartoon) - Finished up the Monster High TV series and while it’s definitely aimed at a pretty young age group, I thought it was cute enough. I like a lot of the new designs with their differing heights and body types, I like how the characters hang out with multiple friend groups and seem to generally get a along with the whole class, and I like the LGBTQA+ and Autism representation being handled well in a show aimed towards children. 

- SSS Class Revival Hunter (Webcomic) - I was really craving more S-Class adjacent content and was led to pick up the next few series since I could get through the chapters in a couple days. This one was okay? I liked the time travel by death mechanic and the brain roommate force ghost, but the series lost quite a bit of momentum in the recent arc with it’s protagonist purposely dying of starvation to learn fighting techniques so that two groups of people could go back to happily murdering each other which. hmm. yeah I’m not feeling it homie, I basically disagree with all of your philosophies here. I might pick it back up after a few months of updates as I do appreciate the larger cast of largely unsexualized women, but ehhh It might just not be for me.

- When the Third Wheel Strikes Back (Webcomic) - I picked this up for the same reason as the previous series, and while there's very few chapters out I am enjoying it as an opener. As tropey as it is the world does at least seem interesting with several mysteries and complicated intrapersonal relationships mixing with political ones, which is fun. I also like the protagonist is a confessional Priest as that’s a pretty fun way to have him hear interesting lore and meet oddballs, so that’s cool. Honestly I’m biased because I always appreciate the “love triangle but the axis is not who you think” dynamic., but I’m looking forward to updates.

- Trash of the Count’s Family (Webcomic) - Reread this as it’s the Holy Trinity series I’m least familiar with. I do still like it quite a bit, and Cale in particular is a fun protagonist, but so far the rest of the characters are cute but a bit flat. Obviously that could change as the story goes on, and it’s possible they are more fleshed out in the novel, but for now I’ll still rank this as the least interesting of the trifecta, if not still an enjoyable series on it’s own. There’s also some great fanfic out there if you’re looking for wholesome found family stuff.

- The Locked Tomb Series (Books) - Harrow is really going through it huh. I miss Gideon.

- Crazy Ex Girlfriend (TV) - As I mentioned before, this series is turning out to be way better than I thought it would be, and honestly that it has any right to be considering it aired on the CW. I’ve been listening to the songs on loop, I love all the different styles, the rhythms, and the humor. 

- The S Classes That I Raised (Webcomic) - Still having a great time.

Listening to: A bunch of Crazy Ex Girlfriend songs, including I’m a Good Person, After Everything You Made Me Do, Nothing Is Ever Anyone’s Fault, and The End of the Movie, The Herse Song by Rusty Cage, Hey I Don’t Work Here by Tom Cardy, Jet Lag by Simple Plan, All Things End by Hozier, Lent by Autoheart, The Sound of Silence cover by Disturbed, and Holy Water by Michael Ray.

[eyeliner-and-c1garettes]

Hi dolls! Welcome to my fashion account.

From 2016-2018 I was an avid polyvore user and content creator. And I may say it was one of the most wonderful, fun, and rewarding apps I’ve ever been a part of. Tragically, the app was shut down, and all was lost for my fashion, character creation, and mood board passion.

For a while I was lost…. Until I discovered shoplook in 2019. It brought me so much joy to create then, when I was being charged to post. But tragedy stuck in April 2020, when I was forced to delete my account. After that, I never thought I’d ever be able to make any content there again…. But at last, in 2023, the year of our lord and savior Zelda Wynn Valdes, I finally found the app again! And folks, I’ll be here to stay forever! I’m adding all the sets I make to this tumblr account, but please feel free to pay me a visit on shoplook under the username eyeliner_and_cigarettes. (Follow this link here!)

I believe that fashion can tell a story. And that story can reflect all the aspects of our personalities, hopes, dreams, and fears. I hope you enjoy the fever dream that is my personal style, what I wish I could be versus what I show you here now, enjoy your stay here! 🗝️

[miloscat]

[Review] Darksiders Genesis (PC)

A twin-stick adventure.

My brother and I have been plugging away at this in co-op sessions for a while and finally got to the end. It’s a spinoff in a series that I’ve seen predominantly described as 3D Zelda-likes, albeit with more involved combat systems. This one is more an isometric twin-stick shooter, although one of the two characters lacks almost any ranged attack. So for Cameron as War it was a hack and slash melee game while I took the gun-toting Strife and enjoyed a shooter.

It’s not just a simple wave combat game though. The story takes you to various locales in this typical “Dante/Milton fanfic” world of demons, fallen angels, Eden, and so forth, with plenty of platforming, puzzling, sidequests, and collectibles to keep you busy. On top of an array of fighting skills, you unlock interaction abilities that let you replay levels to find more goodies, and there’s a big “passive bonus” tree to fill in with demon soul orbs, so there’s lots of options and customisation. But it’s not overwhelming, and easy enough to just pick a few favourite techniques/ammo types and get on with it.

Cameron always wanted to skip the story scenes, but I insisted on watching them. Sometimes there’s cool motion comic cutscenes, but it’s often just voiced dialogue. Strife’s wisecracking banter is a good foil to War’s stoicism, but my favourite was supporting NPC Samael, voiced by Australian actor Vernon Wells, whose delivery was refreshingly naturalistic despite the demonic pitch shifting filter. The plot is convoluted as heck but a decent excuse for some realm-hopping action. The ending lets it down though, with an anticlimactic boss fight and a resolution that kind off just trails off. What could I expect from a prequel, I guess.

I’m struggling to put much more into words. For us it was a decent way to fill time while hanging out with a bro. It looks good, it plays well, there’s some hilariously demanding/janky optional platforming challenges that were enjoyable as a shared experience. The basic thing is that the combat works quite well and there’s a lot of it, with good enemy variety. What more can you ask for?

[bellmo15-blog]

Gaming Isn't Good Anymore Apparently

Pro Gamer: Hello everyone, it’s me. xX_ProGamer69_Xx. And I’m depressed. Why? Well, it all happened one day when I was looking at my gaming shelf consisting of the only three games I actually own of Super Mario Bros, Zelda and Who Framed Rodger Rabbit as well as the only video game console I actually own, my Nintendo Entertainment System, I start to get depressed. Because I’ve been playing these same three games since the 80’s and not bothering to try out any new games since then, know every corner of these games, every secret and can literally speedrun Zelda with bombs only for breakfast and only during my recent run did I realise. Gaming isn’t good anymore. Now when I play these same three games I just feel… empty!

PG: And I’m sure there’s going to be someone in the comments typing “Oh well no shit you don’t enjoy gaming anymore, you’ve been playing the same three games for several decades now, one of which isn’t even that good anyway.” And I have a perfectly good response for you. Shut up!

PG: And besides, there’s no good new games coming out anymore anyway! Not one single good game has come out in the last couple of decades. I know because I’ve consumed hundreds of hours of other copy pasted Gaming is Dead videos and don’t need to play or try anything out for myself to know that gaming isn’t fun anymore… And that’s all I got for this…… Look rent is coming up and I just need ad revenue okay so please share this video around and get people to subscribe because something something not enough people are subbed bye.

PG: … Okay, video’s done, I made convincing arguments, now to just sit back and watch the views and comments roll in for my… Wait… my gamer sense is going off. Oh no, someone nearby is… ENJOYING A MODERN GAME!

Bellmo’s Home

PG: Kicks down the door. Stop right there evil dooer!

Ugg, hello Pro Gamer. What do you want? April Fools isn’t for a couple months now.

PG: My gamer sense was going off and it was leading me to your home!

…… Your “gamer sense.”

PG: Yes! And it was telling me that you were playing… A MODERN GAME!?

…… Yeah? So?

PG: So? SO? How could you!? Gaming isn’t good anymore!

Oh God, not another one. Look dude, this is actually a really fun game I’m playing. Rise of the Ronin. It has some really fun and satisfying combat, a really unique setting where both Eastern and Western cultures collide and it’s one of the only other Soulsborne like games I’ve played where you can actually lower the difficulty if it’s getting two much for you with the only other game I’ve played in this style that does this being Stellar Bl…

PG: Stop! You lost me at “this is actually a really fun game.”

But it is though! Look, I just started a new game. I was going to try doing a pure samurai run where I’d use nothing but katana’s for the whole run and throw stealth out the window but you can have a go if you want.

PG: No!

… Do you just not like Soulsborne games or something? Because you can just say that if you want and I’d believe you since these types of games are already really hard to get into for some people because of how they are made to be super difficult from the get go anyway and that turns a lot of people away from them.

PG: It’s amazing anyone can like these games to begin with.

Okay, if your going to be THAT critical of a game you won’t even try out why you play this instead, Astro Bot. It’s a lot simpler since it’s classic platforming goodness and is just overall a really fun game even if you don’t have any attachment to a lot of the franchise it’s refencing. I mean hell, this game ever won Game of the Year. Because that really matters to people... For some reason.

PG:… Nope, still not playing it!

Wha… WHY NOT!?

PG: Do you really think I’ll be won over by blatant fan service like what this game has?

Okay, I admit, the fan service in Astro Bot isn’t exactly subtle but how is that a detriment to the gameplay of this gameplay first game?

PG: Well because it’s clearly using fan service as a substitute for interesting gameplay and they know sheep like you will instantly fall for it.

Okay look, as much as I’m with you on not wanting games, movies or anything to rely to much on callbacks, fan service or nostalgia because there are times when it can come off as either in your face or over indulgent, Astro Bot doesn’t have that issue because most of it is relegated to optional special bots and even then what they are referencing you either have to have played the games they are referencing or have some knowledge of them to get the reference and even the levels that are just straight up recreations of other games they are just fun on their own and help break up the usual gameplay.

PG: Well umm… there’s… it’s not as good as…

Sigh You can’t find anything actually worth complaining about to prove your point about why gaming isn’t good anymore can you?

PG: But I just did!

Okay, here’s a game you can’t possibly hate then, Stray! It’s an incredibly unique game where you play…

PG: Play as a cat? Yeah, I know. And what a lame concept for a game. I mean, a fucking cat? Who want’s to play that!?

… Arzette: The Jewel of Faramore then? It’s made as a parody of the infamously bad CD-i Zelda games, even having the voice actors from those games voice in this one, difference is this game is actually well made.

PG: “Oh look at us! We are so funny making a parody of those games that inspired Youtube Poops. Please play us.”

Okay fine! Look, I recently just brought the remastered collection of the first three Tomb Raider games using what was left of my Christmas money. If you won’t play anything new, then maybe you can try something old with a new coat of paint.

PG: Please, if the Definitive Edition of the Grand Theft Auto trilogy was the worst way to play these games what makes you think this is going to be any better?

Because people seem to really like this version of the trilogy and say it’s still a good way to experience it. I mean they wouldn’t of announced they were going to give this same treatment to three more classic Tomb Raider games if this was not well liked. And not every remaster of classic games has been bad either dude, I played Klonoa Phantasy Reverie Series last year and that is still a good ways to experience the Klonoa games nowadays if you can get over how distracting it is that this collections version of Klonoa 1 is using the compressed voice clips from the original PS1 version alongside the higher quality models.

PG: And?

Sigh. Okay, fine! You said in your recent video you liked Mario right? Well, why not play Super Mario Wonder? It’s a really dam good Mario game that has it’s own unique mechanics while still being the same Mario fun as it always has.

PG: Ooooh, Mario! … Shakes head. You can’t convince me to give modern gaming a try no matter what Bellmo! There are no good games coming out anymore, gaming is dead and that’s final!

… Have you ever actually tried a modern game to form your own opinion on it?

PG: Nope!

Or at least looked into any of the actually really great games beyond some of the average or mediocre stuff that does get released?

PG: Still no!

Or shown any interest in any game beyond just those three you own?

PG: Oh, so THAT’S how you want to play this? I see what you’re trying to do. Well guess what, it isn’t going to work! I can’t believe your actually defending modern gaming and acting like there’s nothing wrong with it!

That is not what I’m doing at all mate! In fact, I have regularly and rightfully called out and criticized a lot of aspect about gaming that I’ve had issues with for years now, some of these even sadly going as far back as the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 days and have only gotten worse.

Games being made live service when they don’t need to be or if you just wanna play a game in single player, games being broken messes on launch only getting periodically fixed, predatory microtransactions, battle passes where you HAVE to play the game during that period while also paying more money to even unlock that pass otherwise that content is lost forever, content being made paid DLC that doesn’t need to be paid DLC, games regularly being delisted from digital stores, “enhanced” re-releases of old games that end up ultimately being worse than those original versions, long as hell install times for games even when you buy said games physically, oh and can someone explain to my why the hell I have to pay an online subscription just to play something with my friends? Yeah, with PlayStation Plus I get free games every month out of it and Xbox Game Pass I get access to 100+ games which I love but does the most basic and in some cases most fundamental aspect of gaming have to be locked behind it as well?

PG: … So, you agree that gaming isn’t good anymore then?

No! No I don’t! Even if I gave you stuff like Golem which is a genuinely bad and poorly made game, Concord which only lasted a week before the server shut down or Suicide Squad Kill the Justice League having all the live service BS I hate on top of already being a mixed bag gameplay wise you can’t just hyper focus purely on the bad games or blow the issues of decent or mediocre at best game so far out of the water and make a bigger deal out of them than they need to be like when people tried doing that shit with LEGO Skywalker Saga or Spider-Man 2! I have played a lot of games from the past five years alone that I’ve loved or at the very least enjoyed to still have fun with gaming now as an adult as I did when I was a child.

No Straight Roads, Animal Crossing New Horizons, Zelda Tears of the Kingdom, Ghost of Tsushima, Astro Bot, God of War Ragnarock, Hi Fi Rush, Super Mario Bros Wonder, and that’s not even counting the games I have on my backlog that people say are great or at least good anyway and have been meaning to get around to like Zelda Echo’s of Wisdom.

There’s still tons of great games that have come out recently and are coming out that gaming isn’t dead to me! Seriously, I can not tell you how hyped I am for Ghost of Yotei to come out! And quite frankly, acting like gaming didn’t have issues in the past is kinda a bad mindset to have. I mean did we all just forget Superman 64 was a thing?

PG: ……… Snoring.

Why do I even bother? Get’s out phone. Hello? Yeah, it’s me. I need you to come over as soon as you can. Yeah, it’s Pro Gamer, he feel asleep in my home and won’t wake up. Thanks.