#I’m thinking about carmy bear tonight

[butchcarmy]

Carmy Berzatto is the character of all time. He is so mentally ill. He has tummy problems. He is wearing that damn shirt. He’s a chain smoker. He’s a sweetie pie. He has tattoos. He is trying to be a kinder person. He has anger issues. He loves food. He doesn’t cook for himself. He is a perfectionist. He has a bad relationship with his family. He is so pretty. He hates himself

[thatsouthernstate]

July 18-19, 2023

If I keep holdin' out

Will the light shine through?

Under this broken roof

It's only rain that I feel

I've been wishing out the days

Oh, oh, oh, come back

I have been planning out

All that I'd say to you

Since you slipped away

Know that I still remain true

I've been wishing out the days

Please say, that if you hadn'ta gone now

I wouldn't have lost you another way

From wherever you are

Oh, oh, come back

And these days, they linger on

And in the night, I been waitin' for

The real possibility that I may meet you in my dreams

I go to sleep

If I don't fall apart

Will my memories stay clear?

So you had to go

And I had to remain here

But the strangest thing today

So far away and yet you feel so close

And I'm not gonna question it any other way

There must be an open door for you

To come back

And the days, they linger on

And every night, what I'm waitin' for

Is the real possibility I may meet you in my dream

Sometimes you're there and you're talking back to me

Come the morning, I could swear that you're next to me

And it's okay

It's okay

It’s okay

I'll be here, come back, come back

I'll be here, come back, come back

I'll be here, come back, come back

[luveline]

Hi luveline! I have a request: in a busy night at the restaurant reader cuts or burns herself and gets overwhelmed and carmen patches her up and calms her down 👉🏻👈🏻 pretty please I loveee your hurt/comfort fics <3

—Carmy looks after you and your burned wrist. fem, 1.2k

Carmy thought he had bad nerves. 

You julienne onion at your station, ready to garnish their miniature French onion hot pots, your hand coming down slightly too hard. You’ve positioned the knife wrong in panic, thumb too far down the blade and claw of your other hand loosely tucked. You’re getting too stressed, and you’re going to get hurt. 

He has too much to do, but not too much to call for your attention across the cutting boards. “Hey, hey,” he insists. You look up. “Slowly and surely. Thumb against the line of the blade, like this.” 

He shows you the proper grip. 

“I know how to do it,” you say, frowning. 

“Just calm down.”

“You’re never calm.” 

Carmy can actually be extremely calm, and especially when he cooks, but nobody at The Bear has true reason to believe him. He has yet to prove himself properly after his in-fridge meltdown. Maybe he can’t. 

But tonight is busy, not make or break. 

“Seriously,” he says, smirking because he knows you hate it, “take it slow. Well, slower. Check your grip and keep going.” 

“Carmy, can you fuck off and let me cut these?” you ask. Clearly, your associates are rubbing off on you. 

Richie chimes in, his official, nothing-but-business intonation in play, “Carmy, can you fuck off, please?” 

Carmy doesn’t need to raise his voice. “Fuck you.” 

“Fuck you, Carmen. Twelve, walking in five. Hands? We’ve gotta pick up some bucatini...” 

Richie’s getting pretty confident in the back of house. Carmy’s happy for him, even if they aren’t speaking outside of the kitchen. 

He’s about to swing around Daniela to help her on the stove when you burst forward toward it and take the reins. Your prep station is cleaned and your onions set aside; he can’t believe how quickly you’re moving, and he saw that chef who was taking questionable substances fuck up a carton of carrots in a good two minutes. Dude was fast. 

He wants to say Baby, slow down, and he wants to examine how awkward ‘baby’ might be if he said it. He can’t think of another pet name that could garner success. Honey’s too old (though maybe, said with softness–), sweetheart too sweet. Doll is for uncles and bub sounds like it’s missing a syllable when he says it. Honestly, Carmy’s just desperate to call you something nice and have you listen, for once. 

You grab a pan from Daniela’s hand. “I got it,” you tell her, not without sympathy. “We can do one each.” 

“Thank you, can you–”

“Daniela, I need those lobster claws now. I’m serious,” Sydney interrupts, giving Daniela a rightfully impatient look. “I needed them five minutes ago.” 

Daniela winces. Sydney waits. You, unbeknownst to everybody except Carmy, attempt to clean a smudge from the hot stove top for no good reason —Carmy could scream at you. He nearly does.

“Can you fucking stop?” he bites. 

Sydney looks at him likes he’s grown a third head, but her reaction, while unfortunate and rather important considering their partnership, is the least of his worries. You flinch at his sudden rough tone and pull your hand back from the smudge, sleeves rolled and clean, skin of your wrist naked and waiting to be branded as you catch it on the side of your hot pan. 

Your yelp is immediate. 

“Fucking– Carmy!” Sydney says. 

He’s not sure why he’s being shouted at. Maybe because he abandons the line at a time where doing so guarantees a ripple effect. 

You’re freaking out. Carmy slides in beside you to encourage the pan off of the heat while you’re unable to tend it. “Daniela?” he says, loud and clipped. 

“It’s okay,” you say. You’re wide-eyed and lying, it isn’t okay, the burn mark is a squeamish pink stripe against your skin and you're already crying. 

Carmy takes your elbow. He wants to yank you to the cold faucet, but he’s measured enough. He has an encyclopaedia of kitchen safety. 

He’s burned himself enough times. “Come here,” he says, though you’re coming anyway, wincing as he leads you to the back of the kitchen by the sink. He stoppers it and starts the cold tap, where he pauses. “It’s gonna sting.” 

“It already stings.” 

Carmy guides your arm under the stream. 

He turns the faucet until it’s a fast running spray and encourages you to lean down to submerge the entirety of the burn in cold water. Your sleeve gets wet. He pushes it up. 

“Carm, it’s fine.” 

He shakes his head to readjust your arm. His hand is tender, but his fingers are trembling. 

“Carmen,” you say firmly, quietly, “it’s okay.” 

He realises suddenly that he’s not breathing. He lets out a breath, pulls another fast one in, and snaps the fuck out of it. “It’s okay,” he repeats, “the cold waters gonna draw out the heat. I’m gonna get the first aid kit.” 

“I have to go back–”

“No.” His and Syd’s kitchen will never prioritise the food over injury. “I’m gonna get the first aid kit, I’m gonna dress it. But you have to stay here for thirty minutes with your hand in the water.” 

“A half hour, are you kidding?” 

“Do I sound like I am?” he asks genuinely, not pissed nor bossy, fighting a tendency to be both. 

“We’re right at the crest of the rush–”

“It doesn’t matter. You can’t prioritise the restaurant over yourself. It’ll fuck you up.” He feels the cold on his hand where he holds yours in the water, watches the water rise to the overflow. “Does it hurt?” He turns your hand to see the burn in better detail. “It’ll blister for sure. You’re gonna have to look after it.” 

You wipe the drying tears from your cheek. It was a stupid question. “Yeah, it hurts. Fuck, it was so hot.” 

“That’s why I told you to calm down.” 

“I know that. Thanks.” 

He doesn’t know if you’re sarcastic or genuine, can’t tell if you’re hurting or pissed at his instruction. You shiver when he lets your wrist go, but you keep the burn submerged, the faucet squeaking as he wrestles it off again. 

“Maybe we could both try calming down,” you suggest. 

“Maybe.” He squeezes his eyes shut quickly. When he opens them, you’re still squinting in your own pain. “Yeah, maybe. I’ll be right back.” 

He pats your shoulder gently. His hand gets stuck to you, massaging tenderly at your shoulder and down your upper arm, your faces closer than they reasonably need to be. 

“You okay?” he asks. 

Your cheek tilts down toward his hand where it holds you, but you don’t let it fall. “I’ll be fine. I am fine. It’s just… busy.” 

“I know.” 

“Never burned myself like that.” 

Carmy has, but you could guess that. “It’s fine. I know how to look after it.” Look after you. 

His hand crests your shoulder. You let your cheek touch briefly to the back of it. “Okay,” you murmur. 

Yeah, he’s fucked. The first aid kit can’t fix what’s wrong with him. 

[alisonsfics]

his little superstar

pairing: carmy berzatto x reader

summary: you’re a local singer in chicago. the bear crew ends up at one of your shows, and carmy is absolutely speechless the moment he lays eyes on you.

word count: 1.5k

warnings: awkward and bashful carmy that will make you MELT

“Do we really have to go to this thing?” Carmy complained. He had been convinced forced to go out to a bar by his friends. “C’mon, you need to get out. You spend too much in the kitchen screaming at us.” Richie added. So, that was how he ended up in a line outside a bar with Richie, Sydney, Marcus, Natalie, and Pete.

“Isn’t there supposed to be some singer here tonight?” Sydney asked, looking over at Nat.

“Oh, yeah. I think I saw a poster that said that. I saw her here last week. This friend from high school invited me for her birthday. She was really good though. Her songs were great.” Nat started to tell Sydney.

Carmy started to zone out, thinking about all the other places in the world he could be. Once every month, Richie made an effort to drag Carmy to some party or bar. If not, Carmy wouldn’t get out at all. If Carmy had it his way, he’d basically live at the restaurant.

When they finally made it inside the bar, Carmy rushed to the bar to order a drink. He’d barely gotten his drink when Nat and Sydney pulled him over to a high-top table that they found. He was already mentally doing the math on how long he needed to stay before he could leave early.

He was brought out of his thoughts when he heard Nat start cheering. He looked over his shoulder and saw you walk onto the stage. The last thing he was thinking about was leaving early.

He didn’t know what he expected, but you weren’t it. You caught him by surprise, and he felt a smile slowly start to form.

Carmy didn’t realize his mouth was hanging open until Richie elbowed him in the side. “Close your mouth. You’ll catch flies.” Richie teased, noticing the way that Carmy was drooling over you.

“Oh shut up,” Carmy said, rolling his eyes at Richie.

Throughout the show, you made eye contact with Carmy a few times. Every time you met his gaze his cheeks instantly turned bright red.

He stuck out to you.

Most people were drinking and chatting with their friends, blissfully ignoring your presence. Some were silently swaying to the music. Not Carmy. He had his eyes glued to you.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t playfully bat your eyelashes at him during some of the more flirtatious lyrics you sang.

After you finished your last song, you winked at Carmy before thanking the crowd and leaving the stage.

“Carmy’s got a crush.” Nat said in a singsong voice. Carmy’s cheeks were bright red. Richie slung his arm around Carmy’s shoulders. “Oh, you totally do, cousin,” Richie said, laughing at Carmy’s embarrassment.

“You all are children. I hope you know that.” Carmy said, pulling away from Richie and heading out the front door. He walked outside the bar and pulled out his pack of cigarettes.

He quickly lit one and tried to distract himself from the nagging that was waiting for him when he went back inside.

The stage door beside him swung open, causing him to jump backwards. “Oh, shit. I’m so sorry. I didn’t think anyone would be out here.” The voice quickly apologized.

Carmy looked up and realized it was you. Every coherent thought left his brain. When Carmy realized he hadn’t replied, it was too late to say anything.

You noticed how timid he was. His eyes were glued to the ground, and he hadn’t said a word. “So, did you like the show? I saw you in there.” You asked him, as though he wasn’t overly aware that you’d been watching him all night.

“Oh yeah yeah— it was good. I mean…just wow, you were great.” Carmy said, quickly mumbling through the words.

He was too busy avoiding eye contact to notice the smile on your face. You definitely thought Carmy was cute.

“I don’t think I’ve ever gotten such a raving review before.” You playfully teased him. Carmy finally looked up at you. He was partly shocked he hadn’t scared you away yet.

“Sorry,” he said, sheepishly. You took a step closer to Carmy, testing the waters. He didn’t move away. “Don’t be. It’s cute,” you said, subconsciously twirling your hair around your finger.

Carmy felt like his skin was on fire. You were looking at him. He felt like all of a sudden he couldn’t remember how to breathe.

“I’m Y/N, by the way,” you said, sticking your hand out. He quickly switched his cigarette into the other hand, so he could shake your hand. “I’m Carmy.” He said, giving you a small smile.

“Oh, shit. You’re the guy. The Bear guy.” You said, remembering seeing his name in a newspaper. If it was possible, he started blushing even more. “Yep, that’s me. Have you been? To the restaurant, I mean,” he asked you.

He started worrying about the possibility of you having already gone to the restaurant and seeing him in one of his arguments with Richie.

“No, I haven’t had the chance yet. I don’t know a lot about food. I feel like I wouldn’t be able to truly appreciate it, but maybe if I had someone to teach me and explain it to me…” you suggested, giving Carmy a smile.

His jaw dropped, and his cigarette almost fell out of his lips. “Wait…me?” He asked, feeling like he was definitely in a dream. You giggled at his shock. “I mean, you are the chef.” You said, nudging him.

“Just to be clear, like a date?” He asked.

“That’s up to you, Romeo,” you said, brushing a piece of his hair behind his ear. You watched him shiver as you touched him.

“Can I umm…get your number?” He nervously asked you. You quickly grabbed a pen out of your purse. “Took you long enough,” you said, giggling at him.

You grabbed his hand and quickly scribbled your number on the back of his hand. He stared at it for a few seconds. Carmy was having trouble processing any of this conversation.

“You’re really pretty.” Carmy said, feeling a bit braver but not a lot.

“Thank you. That’s really sweet. You’re also very pretty.” You said, giving his hand a quick squeeze.

Carmy dropped his cigarette and stomped on it. “I should probably go back in. I don’t want to keep you.” He said, starting to walk back towards the front door.

“Hang on a second, pretty boy,” you called after him, stopping him in his tracks. He turned around to face you, confused and nervous. “You forgot something.” You said, taking a few steps towards him.

He instantly checked his pockets. You grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him in to kiss you. It took him a second to kiss you back, having to process his initial shock. Once he kissed you back, he was still too nervous to touch you.

“I’m not going to break, I promise,” you teased him. You grabbed both his hands and moved them to wrap around your waist. He tightly held onto your waist and didn’t let go. You pulled him back into the kiss, letting your fingers run through his hair. He lightly hummed against the kiss, causing you to smirk.

You pulled out of the kiss. “You better call me.” You jokingly warned him.

“Don’t think I could forget if I tried,” Carmy said, as you headed back inside through the stage door.

He let out a sigh and raked his fingers through his now-messy hair. “She’s perfect,” he mumbled to himself. He took a few deep breaths before heading back inside.

“Ay, he’s back. We were starting to think you left, Carm.” Nat said, as Carmy rejoined their group.

“Holy shit,” Richie said, staring at Carmy in shock. Carmy froze, having no idea what Richie was talking about. “What?” Carmy asked, cluelessly.

Richie just chuckled at Carmy’s clear confusion. “Who were you outside with?” Richie asked, smirking at him. Carmy’s eyes went wide. “What—uhh what do you mean?” Carmy lied.

“So, that’s your own lipstick that you’re wearing?” Richie asked. Carmy realized what he meant and started furiously trying to wipe your lipstick off his lips, causing the whole group to start laughing. “So who was it?” Nat asked. Carmy refused to even look her in the eyes.

Then, Sydney spotted something on his hand as he tried to remove the lipstick. She grabbed his wrist and flipped his hand over. They all saw your name scribbled on his hand next to a phone number.

“Oh, shit. You got yourself your own little superstar, cousin?” Richie said, in shock.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Carmy said, pulling his hand away from Sydney. Carmy knew what teasing awaited him for the rest of the night. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m impressed. I didn’t think you’d be able to pull that off” Nat teased him.

Carmy wasn’t offended. He also was left wondering how he managed to get your phone number.

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[wannabeschyulersister]

under pressure

You were going to kill Richie. Strangle him until he was blue in the face. What sane person would send someone 47 texts while they were at work?

The door to the Bear was locked but you pounded on it until Fak answered it. “(Y/n)! What are you doing here?” He genuinely looked happy to see you.

“Hi Fak. Where the fuck is Richie?” You got straight to the point.

“He’s uh, in the back I think.” Fak knew better than to keep babbling on when you were upset.

You walked across the recently buffed floor to find the tall motherfucker that doesn’t know basic texting etiquette. Once you walked into the kitchen, it was pure chaos. There was shouting (mostly coming from Richie).

“Richie!” You yelled causing everyone to stop in their tracks.

Richie’s eyes widened a little, “Hey-“

You moved towards him and immediately shut him up, “You texted me 47 times! My phone literally froze from all of the texts! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“What’s wrong with me?! I was textin’ you because your boy is losing his fuckin’ mind!” Richie shouted back.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

Richie grabbed a piece of paper off the counter, “Look at this shit! He’s changing the menu every fuckin’ day and also has this bullshit list of non-negotiables.”

You grabbed the paper from him (more like snatched it) and quickly glanced over it. It did in fact seem like Carmen was losing his mind.

“This doesn’t give you an excuse to text me like I owe you money or something!” You handed him the paper back (more like threw it) and made your way to the back in search of Carmen. He wasn’t in the office or near the lockers. You opened the back door and he was leaning against the wall.

He looked up when he heard the door opening and was surprised to see you. “Hey, I thought you were comin’ later tonight.”

“That was the plan but Richie is a dick.”

Carmen chuckled and reached out for you. You set your bag on a nearby box and let him pull you closer. He rested his head on your shoulder, “I think I’m fuckin’ this up.”

“And by “this” you mean the restaurant?”

He nodded a little against you, “Everything is fucked.”

“It did seem a little chaotic in there today. Richie said you want to change the menu every day?”

“It’s what the best restaurants do. It’s insane, I know but we have to try.”

“Doesn’t it seem a little insane to try that though?”

“It’ll be worth it. I don’t want to let anyone down. Everyone’s countin’ on me. I want to get Syd a star. I want to help Richie and Fak. Tina. And Marcus-“

You placed your hand on the back of his head soothingly. “I know, Carm.”

“I can’t disappoint everyone. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“Carm, you make me proud each and every day. What you do in that kitchen is magical. Sure, sometimes a little dramatic,” that made him laugh, “but you’re amazing at what you do. This place, it’ll start off bumpy, it wouldn’t be easy. But once you all settle into your groove, people will be fighting to get into this place.”

Carmen tightened his grip on you and took a deep breath. He lifted his head and looked at you. You could see the anxiety practically written on his face. He was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. You wanted so badly to take the burden off of him.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He mumbled before kissing you softly.

“You’d have to deal with Richie’s crazy ass by yourself.”

Carmen laughed again and rested his forehead against yours, “What a nightmare.” You loved looking into his beautiful blue eyes.

“When Sugar is out on maternity leave, I want to step in to help.”

Carmen was a little surprised about what you said, “Really? But- but what about your job?”

“I’ve talked to my boss. I’m going to use some vacation time and then reduce my hours so that I can do both.”

“No, (Y/n). I can’t have you spreadin’ yourself so thin. I don’t want you stressed.”

“I’m going to be fine. I want to be here with you and to help the others.”

“(Y/n)-“

“Carmy, I’m not taking no for an answer. Don’t you want me around more? I’ll take some stress off of your plate. I’ll be here late nights with you with no one else around…” you trailed off hoping he’d catch the hint.

He smiled a little bit, “Late nights?”

You nodded, “Yes, late nights.”

“I like the idea of that.”

[aestheticaltcow]

Healing

Carmen "Carmy" Berzatto x Reader

This one went in a different direction than originally planned ngl. There isn't a lot of smut but I like how I ended it... MDNI 18+

The Bear Masterlist

Previous part

You bit the inside of your cheek, trying to hide the pleasure you felt when Carmy finally erupted inside of you. Carmy’s whimpered moans filled your ear as he nipped at your jaw the way he knew you loved. You sighed as you let your fingers run down Carmy’s toned back. 

When Carmy pulled out, you felt his ejaculation ooze out of you, and regret washed over you. You should have just walked down the hall to your room and pretended you never saw him jacking off with your underwear while he watched a video of the two of you hooking up. You watched him lay next to you and catch his breath before rolling on his side to face you. You reluctantly copied the move and stared at him. 

Carmy gently pushed your bangs away from your face before planting his hand on your cheek. You bit your lip, trying to hide the soft smile on your face. He grinned and took a shallow breath before admitting, “I’m going to work my ass off every day for the rest of my life to prove how sorry I am.”

You nodded in response and moved closer to him. Carmy’s hand left your face, and he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you on top of him as he rolled onto his back. “I love you, baby,” he mumbled into your shoulder as he snuggled you as closely as humanly possible. You nervously swallowed, “Carmy… I don’t think I’m there yet…” you felt his body shift below you. “O-okay.” he stuttered, “Can-n you lay with me a little longer?” 

“Of course, Carm.”

~

“Mia, I need you to eat your breakfast,” you sternly explained as Mia threw pieces of egg on the floor. “Baby girl, come on.” You sighed as you crouched in front of her high chair before taking the fork from her hand. She wiggled, trying to get away from you as you stabbed the sliced banana in front of her. “Mia, let’s have a good morning that starts with a good breakfast.” 

“Are you trying to bargain with our ten-month-old?” Carmy laughed as he stood in the kitchen doorway. You rolled your eyes and stood up, “You try. She’s bein’ so fussy this morning.” Carmy shook his head and went up to her. Mia’s hands immediately started grabbing in his direction, “I swear, I carried you for nine months. 22 hours of labor, and a c-section, only for you to love him more than me… you’re lucky you’re cute.” you playfully teased Mia before planting a kiss on her chubby cheek. Her giggles lit up the room as Carmy pulled a chair beside her, “Okay, princess, let’s eat.” 

As you ate your breakfast, you watched Carmy feed Mia. Something was different about him. You leaned back against the counter and really looked at him. He wore one of his slightly too-tight T-shirts and a pair of black jeans with the same gold chain he’d worn every day. As you scanned his body, you saw it: He was wearing his wedding ring. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d seen him wear it. Something about it made you feel uneasy.

~

“Hey, Carmy… when you get home tonight, do you think we can talk about some stuff?” you asked as you adjusted Mia on your hip. Carmy looked at you like a deer in the headlights and hesitantly nodded as he picked up his backpack from the ground. “It’s nothing bad… just about last night and some other stuff,”  you explained, hoping to alleviate some of his anxiety. Carmy nodded again and slung his bag over his shoulder. He stepped forward and kissed Mia’s head before playfully punching your arm, “Bye, girls…” he grinned before ducking out of the house for the day.

Carmy drummed his thumbs on the steering wheel of his car as he sat in traffic on his way to work. What did you want to talk about? Last night was everything he wanted. The two of you had sex for the first time in almost a year, the two of you slept in the same bed for the first time in months, and for a minute, Carmy had everything he’d wanted. He should have deleted Selena’s number when he got in the car that day. You were going to leave him; that’s what it had to be.

Throughout the day, Carmy was distracted. He was thinking about the conversation the two of you were having that night. He should prepare a speech. Should he buy you flowers? If he left early, he could stop at your favorite bakery and pick you up a sweet treat. Prep, family, and dinner service were a blur. He heard people talking to him, but none of what they said made sense; it was like he was back in school. Everything was going in one ear and out the other. He just needed to get home.

When Carmy walked into the house that night, he felt his heart rate accelerate. He quietly pushed his jacket off and stepped out of his shoes before walking back to your bedroom. You sat in bed doing something on your computer. Carmy sighed before making his presence known. He saw you sitting in the middle of the bed with your hair wrapped up in a microfiber towel, your face shiny from skin care products, and your glasses perched on the bridge of your nose. “Hey baby.” he weakly grinned as he approached the bed. You grinned at him and closed your computer, “Hey Carm.”

“Still wanna talk?” Carmy asked as he shoved his hands into his pant pockets. You patted the mattress beside you and watched as Carmy pulled his hands from his pocket and sat on the edge of the mattress. “Carmy, I want-” You were cut off by Carmy standing up and pacing the space between the bed and closet door. He pushed his hands through his hair, took a deep breath, and looked at you with his fingers still tangled in his hair. “Baby. You can’t leave me. I know I fucked up, but please give me a second chance-”

“Carmy! I wanna go to couple’s counseling.”

~

“I understand that you didn’t have sex with that grocery store whore, but you went to her house with the intention to. And that’s what I’m hung up on.” you calmly explained as you watched Carmy sit back on the ugly cranberry couch in the therapist's office. The two of you had been going to therapy for a little over a month at this point, and while a dialogue was created, he just didn’t understand why you couldn’t move past it.

“How does that make you feel, Carmen?” the therapist questioned as they fidgetted with a pen.

“I’m confused. You kicked me out for like two months, contemplated divorcing me, and then you let me come home and sleep with me, but you’re still ‘not there’ when I tell you I love you. We’re spending a lot of time together as a family, but when I try to hang out with just you- you get weird. Like last night, I sat next to you on the couch and you got up because you ‘had to check on a rendering video’; then you didn’t come back. You act like nothings wrong around Mia or family, but when we’re alone, it’s like you’re in a different universe. Look, I know I fucked up. I just want to know what I need to do to make it right between us. I get we can’t go back to exactly what we had, but do you even like me anymore?” Carmy looked at you while on the verge of tears. 

“Y/N, is there anything you want to say?”

“Carmy, I care about you so much and value our relationship, but right now, I’m just frustrated. I would never cheat on you, and the only reason you didn’t cheat on me was because you ‘couldn’t get hard’... I just- I don’t know what I need from you right now. I really appreciate you agreeing to this, and you’re a wonderful father, but I just don’t know.” you explained as you picked at the hole in your jeans. 

~

Carmy opened the passenger’s door for you, and you quickly slipped into his car. He walked around and slipped in the driver’s seat, “We should start planning Mia’s birthday party.” you brought up as he turned on the car. Carmy nodded in agreement as you grabbed your phone from your purse, “I have a couple of Pinterest boards for party inspo. Since she’s not gonna remember it, we don’t have to go all out, but I like the idea of doing ‘My Berry First’ birthday party since my baby shower was also kinda fruity themed-”

“You don’t like me anymore.” Carmy spat, cutting you off midsentence. “What?” Surprised by his statement, you put your phone down and looked at him. He sighed and pulled over into a 7/11 parking lot. You watched as he tilted his head back and stared at the car's roof before slowly blinking. “Baby. Do you like me? Do you actually want to spend time with me? The only thing we do together anymore is go to couples counseling. You never want to go out to dinner or run errands together- the only time I fuckin’ see you is when we’re doing something with Mia. You say you love me and want to reconcile, but you don’t like me.” Carmy rubbed the back of his neck before glancing in your direction. 

You’d turned in your seat, bringing your left leg up to the seat awkwardly sitting on it, “Carmen… I just- I don’t know. I like you, and I love our family, but it’s just hard.” you began to explain. “Listen, Carmen, I don’t want to divorce you. There’s just this tension- I don’t know how to explain it to you. I look at you and see the man I’ve been with for, like, what, seven years? But then I start thinking about you and that fucking whore. I think about how you didn’t tell her you were married. I think about her kissing you and touching you- it makes me wanna fuckin’ puke.” 

You took a deep breath before continuing, “Carmy, I like you. I’m just- not there yet….”

~

“Hey, I’m gonna go to bed,” you said, poking your head into the living room. Carmy nodded without looking up at you, “Night.” he said as he flipped to a different channel on the TV. You stood against the doorway and watched as he stared at the screen lifelessly. With a sigh, you walked into the living room and stood beside Carmy. He was unphased; you needed to up the antics. You stepped closer and swiftly straddled Carmy’s hips, which thankfully got his attention. Carmy swallowed when you put a hand on his collarbone, “Hey.” you halfheartedly grinned. 

Carmy took swallow breaths as he stared up at you. He allowed himself to rest his palms on your hips before fanning his fingers out to grab the fat of your ass, “I’m not really in the mood, baby.”

You rolled your eyes and playfully hit him, “I swear Carmy… I like you. If I didn’t, I woulda never come up to you at that bar. I wouldn’t have agreed to be exclusive. I wouldn’t have moved into that shitty apartment you had. I wouldn’t have given up that job opportunity in California. I wouldn’t have married you or had your baby. I like you as a person, partner, father to my child…. Let’s spend some time together.” 

~

You rubbed your lips together after applying a layer of pink-tinted lip oil. Your hair and makeup were as good as it was going to get. After slipping on a red barely long enough to cover your butt dress and a pair of black platform boots, you stared at yourself in the mirror. You smoothed down the bottom of your dress and grabbed a slightly oversized light-wash denim jacket along with your bag, “Let’s fuckin go.” you said as you walked out of the bedroom.

Carmy was in the kitchen with Mia on his hip. She had a fist full of his tank top in one hand and one of her stuffed animals in the other. When he heard the dryer go off, Carmy gently put her down, “Race ya?” he asked, hoping to tire her out enough for Donna to keep up with her. Mia plopped on the floor and stared up at him, disinterested in doing anything to make his morning easier. Carmy laughed and walked to the laundry room just off the kitchen. He grabbed a short-sleeved button-up shirt and slipped it on before throwing the rest of the clean clothes in a laundry basket. He felt nervous. It was silly, though- it’s not like he’d never had a date with you. He took a deep breath and returned to the kitchen to see Mia playing with Tupperware; he shook his head and swiftly scooped her off the floor. Mia dropped the container on the floor and grabbed at Carmy’s ear.

“You look pretty,” Carmy said as you sat in the passenger’s seat of his car after strapping Mia into her car seat. You smiled and pushed your bangs back, “You noticed…” you teased. Carmy chuckled as started backing out of the driveway. He put his right hand against your seat as he looked over his shoulder. You held your breath when you noticed his jugular bulge from his neck. 

You were looking out the window when you felt Carmy reach over to your lap, you glance down to see him intertwine his fingers with yours. A blush came to your cheeks as he squeezed your hand softly, you bit your lip and rubbed your index finger between his knuckles.

Dropping Mia off at Donna’s always made you nervous; she’d changed since Natalie had started having kids, but you were haunted by her drunken rants criticizing Carmy for being with you and how you must have only been after his money. You laughed to yourself as you watched Carmy walk Mia into the house. She grabbed in your direction, her adorable little smile shining past the shield of her pacifier. You waved back before Carmy entered the house. 

He came back to the car and pulled his phone out of his pocket to connect to the car’s bluetooth, “Where are we going on our date afternoon?” you asked as you nudged his shoulder. Carmy grinned at his phone as he scrolled through his Spotify playlist looking for a song to play, “If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise.” he hit play on his phone and pulled away from the curb.

~

A couple of donuts and a walk through the park led you and Carmy to a secluded bench by a pond. “Have we brought Mia here?” you asked, unsure of the familiarity of your surroundings. Carmy nodded, “Sorta—you were pregnant with her.” 

You smiled and scooted closer to him, snaking an arm around his waist. Carmy smiled and threw an arm over your shoulders. “It’s weird. We have a one-year-old. It feels like I was pregnant with her yesterday.” 

“It is. If you could change anything—aside from the obvious—what would you pick?” Carmy asked into your hair as he kissed the top of your head. You thought momentarily, “Well, besides the obvious, I don’t think I’d change anything. We have a pretty cool kid.”

Carmy rubbed your bicep as the two of you watched ducks swim in the pond. Carmy brought his free hand to your chin, pushed it up with his index finger, and brought his lips down to yours. Before the two of you could kiss, he softly whispered, “Can I kiss you, baby?”

Instead of answering, you pressed your lips to his. He kissed back immediately and pulled you closer to him. You cupped his face in your hands as Carmy pulled you onto his lap; your stomach fluttered as Carmy’s grip tightened. As you separated your lips to allow your tongue to slip into Carmy’s mouth, you felt his phone vibrate against your hip. Carmy wanted to ignore the call and risk getting caught for indecent exposure, but when you reluctantly pulled away, he fished his phone out of his pocket and saw Donna’s name flashing across the screen. “Looks like Grandma Donna is at her Mia limit.” he chuckled and answered to have his assumptions confirmed by an overwhelmed Donna and a crying Mia in the background. 

You got up from Carmy’s lap and smoothed down the back of your dress. He swallowed when he saw a peak of your butt cheek as you stood up. “We’re on our way, Ma.” he quickly said into the phone, cutting Donna off mid-sentence before hanging up.

 “We can pick up where we left off later,” you say, biting your lip. Taking Carmy’s hand in yours, you trek back to the car and retrieve an overstimulated Mia from Grandma Donna’s house. By the time the two of you had gotten her to calm down and eat, the mood was gone, but Carmy had promised to make it up to you the following weekend.

~

“Dam, I thought the view from behind was good, but it’s even better up here.” some Andrew Tate-looking man greeted you. You internally cringed as you noticed how he looked at you like a piece of meat. You rolled your eyes and waited for the bartender to finish the drinks you’d ordered. “Can’t even get a hello?” the man questioned you, stepping forward. You scoffed, “I don’t owe you shit- maybe my husband’ll say hello to you.”

“I don’t see a husband anywhere. Don’t play so hard to get a sexy girl. Why don’t you come back to my booth?” His slimy offer disgusted you. You shook your head and slipped the bartender a $20 before taking your drinks back to the small window table you and Carmy had been sitting at. Carmy was outside on the phone dealing with some issue down at the restaurant; he shot you an apologetic smile.

While Carmy was wrapping up his phone call, the man from the bar strode up to the table to convince you to go back to his booth. You weren’t having any of it. “Where’s that husband of yours?” he questioned, sitting where Carmy had been moments prior. You gestured outside; Carmy had his back to the window as he listened to Richie’s nonsensical problem.

“That guy? The one on the phone who’s not even looking at you? I don’t believe you, sweetheart.” he purred as he relaxed into the chair opposite of you. You rolled your eyes and held your left hand up, you wiggled your ring finger; “Say that to the ring on my finger.”

“Come on, baby girl. I just bought a bottle of 925 Diamante Ley. Do one shot with me, and then you can decide if you want to come back to your ‘husband’ or not.” as he reached out to touch your bicep, Carmy cleared his throat. You looked up at him, immediately relieved. The guy looked over his shoulder, and Carmy glared at him, “Get a fuckin’ clue asshole. This is my wife and the mother of my child. Fuck off before I need to make you fuck off.” 

The man looked Carmy up and down before shifting his attention back to you, “Oh hell fuckin’ no. Don’t need that nasty stretched out-” he was cut off by Carmy shoving the guy out of his chair. “Don’t fuckin’ dare finish that dam sentence. She’s a fuckin’ angel, and you should even be allowed in the same room as her.” Carmy spat as the guy stumbled back to his feet. “Yeah, whatever, man- she’s not even that hot.” he scoffed as he pushed past Carmy. You reached out to grab Carmy’s hand as the man walked out of earshot, “He’s not worth it, Carm.” you spoke softly as you squeezed his hand in yours, “Can we just get out of here?” 

Carmy looked back at you, nodded, and pulled you to his side. As the two of you walked out of the bar, you couldn’t help but notice the scuzzball trying to get another table of girls to come back to his booth. You rolled your eyes and wrapped an arm around Carmy’s waist as he directed the two of you back to the car, “Fuck that dude.” Carmy mumbled as he closed your door after you’d gotten into the passenger’s side.

“You know your pussy isn’t ‘stretched out’ or ‘nasty’ right?” Carmy asked, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen over the two of you on the drive home. You nodded, “I know Carmy.” 

When Carmy parked in the driveway, he turned his head to look at you. He put a hand on your thigh and squeezed gently. You placed your hand on his and sighed softly before asking, “Do you wanna take a shower with me?” 

Carmy laughed, “Baby, if I ever say no to that question, have me committed.” You rolled your eyes and opened the car door. As you walked to the front door, Carmy was hot on your heels. Before you could open the door, Carmy wrapped his arms around your waist. You put your head back against his shoulder, “Pay the sitter… I’ll start the shower.” 

Carmy nodded and kissed your cheek before dropping his arms, allowing you to open the front door. You quickly walked down the hall, quickly poking your head into Mia’s bedroom before heading back into the master bedroom. Carmy stared at your ass as you walked away. He sucked in a breath and went into the kitchen to see the babysitter sitting at the kitchen island reading out of a beat-up history book, “Hi, Mr.Berzatto. Mia was a little fussy, but I got her down.” she began to explain. Carmy nodded, not really absorbing anything she’d said. He reached into his pocket and pulled his phone out to Venmo her for the night. “Thanks, kid- Y/N or I’ll call you next time we need you.”

You stood in the bathroom in your underwear, waiting for the shower to heat up and for Carmy to join you. Carmy locked the front door and grabbed the baby monitor from the kitchen counter before barreling down the hallway. When he got to the door to the master bedroom, he took a breath and slowed down so he wouldn’t come off as overly desperate. Walking into the bedroom, he put the baby monitor on your dresser before kicking his shoes off and stripping to his underwear. As he walked to the askew bathroom door, he ran his tongue over his teeth when he noticed you looking at your reflection in the mirror. He noticed you pulling at the skin on your stomach with a frown. Carmy huffed and softly opened the door more. You looked over at him as he stepped further into the bathroom. His hands found your hips and lifted you onto the counter, “So fuckin’ sexy, baby…” Carmy muttered as his lips crashed onto yours. You were taken by surprise but allowed Carmy to wedge himself between your thighs as you wrapped your arms around his neck. 

“Carm- showers on…” you manage to get out after pushing his chest away from you. Begrudgingly, he stepped away and pulled the shower curtain open. “Oh god, you’re trying to boil us alive.” Carmy laughed as he pulled his hand away from the water. You rolled your eyes before hopping off the counter. After removing your bra and underwear you stepped into the shower. Carmy pushed his boxers down and joined you after turning the heat down. 

~

“Can you sleep in here Carmy?” Carmy’s heart stopped as the words left your mouth. He nodded softly trying his hardest to not come off as desperate. You saw through it immediately and playfully nudged his shoulder as you walked past him into the bedroom. Carmy looked in the mirror and pushed his wet hair back with his hands, a goofy grin was plastered on his face at the realization that he’d managed to get back on your good side. 

When Carmy joined you in bed you immediately scooted closer to him, wrapping your arms around his waist. “I missed this…” you mumbled into his chest as you snuggled closer to him. Carmy chuckled and kissed the top of your head.

“I missed this more, baby,” he responded as he pulled you onto his hips. “I love you. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life, but hurting you was the worst,” he said as he held you. “I’m never going to hurt you like that again.” 

You nodded and pushed yourself up into a sitting position. Staring down at him, you saw the Carmy you’d fallen in love with all those years ago. “You’re not gonna get a third chance, Berzatto. Fuck up again. I’m cutting your dick off.” you threatened, much to his amusement. He shook his head, chuckling, “I won’t need a third chance, baby.”

“Good. I love you, Carmen. Don’t make me look like a fool again.”

[carmenberzattosgf]

ok but like. what do u think carm’s take on (consensual obvs) free use would be. just a little thought :O

( this is from March 28th I deeply apologize for the length of time this rotted)

Carmy would be SO hesitant to try it. Even with a safe word in place Carmy would be scared to hurt you. It would take ages of you and him talking about it for him to agree, but the circumstances have to be very specific.

As unhinged as this may sound, I see this playing out for the first at the restaurant. You have one job, and that is to sit in his office for whenever he wants to have you. You both sit down and plan it out the night before so you would be completely in the know about the situation.

He brings you with him to the Bear the next day. Carmy’s always the first one there, so there’s no chance of anyone seeing you walk in with him.

You’ve got everything you need in a backpack with you as Carmy walks you into the office. A water bottle, snacks, your laptop, and any other little things you might need. ( for horny purposes I’m imaging a small love seat of some kind nestled in the corner of the office.)

You sit down on the loveseat and pull out your computer; the show you want to binge is already pulled up and ready. Carmy on the other hand sits at his desk to check his emails, making sure everything looks in order for service tonight. The comfortable silence in the restaurant ends as you hear the back door open. Carmen hops up out of his chair and walks over to you, leaning down to kiss your head.

“Gotta get out there now, baby. No one will come in here; the staff’s not suppose to without asking me first. You sure you’re okay with this?”

“Mhm! I would just be sitting at home doing the same thing, anyways. This way, I can make myself useful for you.”

It’s not even half way though prep when Carmy walks back into the office. As soon as he closes the door and locks it, you quickly put your laptop down beside the love seat.

He’s mad about something. You can tell by the way his fists are clenched at his sides. He makes his way to stand in front of where you sit. All you do is look up at him expectantly, not daring to say the first word.

“What are you waiting for? Go ahead.” He mutters, gesturing to his waistband. You make quick work of his pants. Carmy doesn’t bother to kick them off; he would need to get back in the kitchen fast anyway. You press your palm to the growing length in his underwear. A shaky breath leaves his lips as he watches you.

“Did something upset you, Carm?” You gaze up at him wide-eyed, like you weren’t eye level with his dick, palming him.

Carmen finally unclenches one of his palms, bringing it up to cup your chin. “I don’t think asking questions was part of the deal. Hurry up and get your mouth on me.” He lets go of your chin and glances over to the clock on his desk. Carmy doesn’t want to take too much time. If he is gone too long, it’ll look suspicious.

You start how you always do, with your hands running up his strong thighs. You lean in and mouth over his boxers. That doesn’t last long, though, before Carmy threads a hand through your hair to pull your head back. His other hand shoves down his waistband, freeing his cock.

“Open. Open up nice and wide for me.” There’s no hesitation on your part as you let your mouth fall open wide, sticking your tongue out for him. “That’s it. Perfect,” he rasps. You look up at him, breathing heavily, when he presses into your mouth. You whine around his length as the salty taste of him overwhelms your tastebuds.

He doesn’t force his cock down your throat, no; you do that all on your own. You make it your mission to take him all the way down your throat, and you do just that. Tears well up in your eyes when your nose juts against his pelvis. Your mouth repeats this motion several times, hollowing your cheeks while you take him as deep as you can.

Carmy looks down at you with his bottom lip between his teeth. He’s breathing heavily through his nose. Seeing you with his cock in your mouth, drool spilling from your lips as you bob your head captivates Carmy. He would let you suck his dick all day if you wanted to. He’d let you sit at his feet and keep him warm with your mouth while he does paperwork.

There’s no time to be thinking about that now, though. Carmen’s eyes dart over to the clock on his desk once again. He’s already been in here for too long. He has too much shit in the kitchen to do.

With two hands, he pushes your hair back, holding your head in his hands. Carmy pushes you off of his length, letting you gasp for air. “Shit, you look so pretty, drooling for my cock,” he mumbles. A string of spit still connects your bottom lip to the head of his cock. Your lips are swollen and red. “Such a pretty little plaything. M’ gonna fuck your mouth. I don’t have time for you to blow me.”

Carmy pauses for a moment, raising his eyebrows. Despite the whole “free use” thing, he’s still trying to make sure you’re okay with this.

“P-please. Want you to cum down my throat.” Your jaw falls slack, just like before, waiting for him.

Carmy adjusts his grip to firmly hold the back of your head. He doesn’t go easy on you when he starts fucking your face. In every single thrust, his cock hit the back of your throat. You keep as quiet as you can, but you can’t help the gagging noises as you try to breathe through your nose. Tears flow down your face in full now as you take what Carmen’s giving you.

It doesn’t take but a minute of Carmy fucking your throat in earnest before he spills in your mouth with a low gravely moan. He pulls out of your mouth, watching you closely to make sure you’re still all good. Knowing he’s studying your every movement, you decide to put on a show. You open your mouth, letting Carmen see his cum sitting on your tongue, before swallowing it down.

“Fuck—I gotta get back to work,” Carmy tucks himself into his pants and is out the door within seconds, leaving you back to your tv show.

It’s quite awhile before Carmy walks back in the room again. It must be busy out there. The chaos in the kitchen is loud and clear from behind the closed door. You can just barely make out Carmen’s voice giving orders to his staff.

This time when he opens the door, he closes it with a loud slam. “Take off your clothes,” he commands, not even a second after stepping in the room.

As soon as your clothes are off, he’s pushing his pants down to free his cock. The love seat is small, but Carmen makes it work, climbing on top of you, and lining up with your core. He presses in to the hilt in one fast thrust, making a whine leave your lips.

“You’re so fucking wet, sweetheart. Did sucking my cock really turn you on that much? Poor thing, I left you all needy didn’t I?” His voice has an edge of mocking in it. “Well let’s hope you cum before i do, because I gotta be quick. Richie fucking over booked the reservations, making my night absolute hell.”

Carmy sets a merciless pace. His goal is clear, make himself cum. You’re starting to get too loud for his liking, whimpering every time the head of his cock hits that spongy spot inside of you. Without a second thought, Carmy presses a palm over your mouth, muffling your noises.

“Do you want everyone to know I’m using you as a fuck toy in here? What would they think, hmm?” You shake your head quickly; the idea is mortifying. “No? Then be quiet.”

Carmy fucks you within an inch of your life. He has mercy on you, removing his palm from your mouth and placing his thumb on your clit to rub fast circles. That pushes you over the edge, pulsing around Carmy’s cock. He spills inside of you a moment later.

The rest of the night goes by fast. The next time he comes in, he kneels in front of you. He doesn’t say a word as he laps at your center, bringing you to orgasm within minutes.

By the end of service, you’ve fallen asleep on the loveseat, curled in on yourself wearing one of Carmy’s sweaters. When Carmen walks in and sees your sleeping frame, he walks back out. He knows you wouldn’t have minded if he fucked you while you slept, but he just doesn’t feel right about it. He had already put your though the ringer.

You wake up, groggy and disoriented to the feeling of being carried. “Carm?”

“Hey baby. I’m just carrying you to the car. You did so good for me tonight. Proud of you.”

“Oh- I didn’t mean to fall asleep. M’sorry.”

“You need your rest, my love. Don’t apologize. Let me get you home, and get you in bed so you can get some sleep.”

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Vienna. Two.

you want to shake him, scream at him, bare your heart to him. you don’t dare. not yet, anyway. you don’t know how to feel - and carmen doesn’t either.

pairing - childhood bestfriend!carmen berzatto x female reader

warnings - cursing.

word count - 2k

authors note - part two, baby! I hope you can start to understand their dynamic here - they’re like magnets. they’re a perfect match until they’re not. this is going to be fun… <3

part one. series masterlist. masterlist. inbox.

Everything is the same. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing is the same.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

“We haven’t done this in a while, huh?”

You shake your head as you adjust the strap of your bag on your shoulder, taking a moment to look Carmen up and down.

He’s dressed up just for you, even attempted to style his hair. He’s wearing trousers and a linen shirt, loafers on his feet instead of the usual beat up sneakers. His jacket is slung over his arm, rings adorning his fingers. He looks handsome.

Although, admittedly, he always looks handsome to you. You’re not blind to the way girls look at him, how they looked at him when you were growing up. He’s always had this unassuming charm, this subtle, quiet beauty. He’s got striking features. Strong jaw, sloping nose, unruly curls.

He was always a skinny, lanky kid. Limbs too big for his body. He had a habit of tripping over his own feet, making both of you laugh no matter how many times it happened.

Now, he’s grown into himself. He looks strong. Broad shoulders, thick biceps, prominent thighs. He’s toned, muscled, built slightly like some sort of Greek God.

The realisation hits you all of a sudden, standing outside of The Bear. It takes you off your feet a little, causing you to sway sideways and into Carmy. His arm wraps around your hip as if by reflex, warmth from his palm bleeding through into the material of your dress. His cologne is woody and musky, and you know if you stand close enough to him for long enough that you’ll smell like it too.

“I’ve never had to do this,” he murmurs, breaking you out of your daydream. “Get seated at my own damn restaurant.”

You chuckle, fixing a stray curl that’s fallen into his eyes with gentle fingers.

“You ready? We’ve been stood here for like ten minutes, Carm. It’s kinda cold.”

You think that maybe this is all a little overwhelming for him, so you’re letting him take all the time he needs. He’s about to eat in his restaurant, the place he’s poured his heart and soul and savings into.

He nods, and you link your cold fingers with his warm ones at your side.

“Relax, Carm. Tonight is going to be incredible, alright? Just you, me, and some damn good food. We’ll be yapping each others ears off soon enough, and you won’t even be thinking about the service, or what’s happening in the kitchen.”

“You’re right,” he mumbles, squeezing your hand. “Just you and me.”

“The way it’s always been.”

You smile, and the smile you receive back is enough to light up your bones.

“Let’s fucking do this.”

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

Richie seats you at the back of the restaurant, tucked away just out of sight. You’re grateful for the cover, and for the fact that Carmy can’t see into the kitchen.

“You nervous about them doing a night on their own, or about having dinner with me?”

His bright blue eyes snap up to meet yours, head tilting in confusion.

“Nervous?”

“You’re shaking the entire table with your knee, Carmen. I think you might be shaking the entire restaurant, actually.”

You reach out under the tablecloth to place a hand on his leg, his jitters stopping instantly.

“Sorry. Fuck, sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.”

“I need to chill the fuck out.”

“Well, I wasn’t going to be the one to say it.”

He laughs, then. Loudly. So loudly that Richie spins around to look at the two of you, fighting a smile as he does it. He hasn’t heard that sound coming from Carmy in a long time.

“Okay, okay. I’m relaxed, I swear. Sorry. It’s just, uh… a lot to process, I guess.”

“I get it. Just remember that I’m in the exact same position as you are, alright? I mean, I’m not about to eat dinner in my restaurant, but you get my point.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re right. Sorry.”

“I haven’t heard you apologise this much since I had to get stitches in fifth grade.”

“Oh, shit. Don’t remind me of that, please.”

It’s your turn to laugh now, your entire being lighting up with it.

“I have never seen you look so guilty in my life, Carm. Thought you were gonna cry every time you saw me.”

“Stop,” he groans. “I felt so bad. It was all my fault, and there was so much blood.”

“You didn’t know I was gonna hit my head.”

“Yeah, but I used to forget that I was stronger than you. Especially when I started growing taller.”

“When did that happen? You got taller?”

“You’re such a bitch,” he laughs, kicking your shin under the table.

“Careful, Carm. That might need stitches.”

“I hate you,” he all but yells, beaming grin plastered across his face. “Shut up and decide what you want to drink.”

You pretend to look at the menu, eyes scanning across it.

“This is hard to read.”

“Hmm?”

“It’s a terrible choice of font, Carmen. There’s no way anyone older than sixty is deciphering this.”

He snatches it from your hand, studying it carefully. After a moment of silence, he speaks.

“Fine. It might be a bit difficult to read.”

You feign passing out, sagging back in your chair like an award winning actress.

“You’re apologising, you’re telling me I’m right… who are you, and what have you done with Carmen Berzatto?”

He laughs again, still loud and real. What a joy, to make your best friend throw his head back in amusement after all this time.

“It’s fine. I’ll just get you to redo them.”

“Oh, you will, will you?”

“Of course. It’s your speciality, and it means there’ll be a piece of you in the restaurant too.”

You think about it for a second, holding his gaze.

“Fine. But only if you ask me nicely.”

“Vienna,” he begins, grabbing your hand across the table. “Will you please do me the honour of designing me some new menus?”

“Carm,” you grin, squeezing his fingers. “I would love to. It’d be my pleasure, in fact.”

“Perfect.”

Richie appears, then, smiling like he knows something you don’t.

“Drinks, kids?”

“Two waters, and two wines that’ll go best with dinner, Cousin.”

You nod in agreement, winking at Richie.

“You got it, Boss.”

When he leaves, you turn to Carmen.

“You guys are… good? You and Richie?”

He looks a little taken aback by your question. Bristled, almost.

“Yeah, uh - yeah, we’re… fine. We’re good. Yeah.”

“Sounds it.”

Another kick meets your shin under the table.

“Fuck you, Berzatto. Those fancy leather shoes hurt.”

“I hate when you do that.”

“Do what?”

“Look at me like you’re reading my mind. It’s annoying.”

“You’re annoying.”

“Real mature, Vi. Real mature.”

Richie appears seemingly out of thin air, placing your drinks on the table. He still has that look on his face.

“Food won’t be long, besties.”

“Besties,” you laugh, shaking your head. “Haven’t heard that in a while.”

“That’s what you always were! The Besties. Honestly, I was always a little jealous. I asked Mikey if we could have a cool nickname for our friendship, but he fuckin’ refused. Asshole.”

The offhand mention of Michael hits you like a punch to the stomach, solid and unflinching. It still makes you want to cry, even after all this time.

“You were always Mikey and Cousin,” you tease, hoping they can’t hear the shake in your voice. “A world famous double act. Never one without the other.”

Richie laughs as he walks away, which in turn makes you smile. He always laughs so wholeheartedly, so fully. It lights up a room.

“I don’t know who’s happier that you’re back - me or him.”

“Oh, definitely him.”

Carmy shakes his head as he chuckles.

“I don’t know about that,” he says quietly, after a minute. “I missed you like hell, Vi.”

“I missed you too,” you murmur, linking your fingers with his atop the table. “I wish you’d answered the phone more.”

“I know. I know. I, uh… I guess I just… I didn’t think you could ever miss me as much as I was missing you.”

“That’s not true,” you whisper, brows furrowed. “That’s not true at all, Carmen. You’d know that if you called. You could have asked, and I would have answered.”

“Yeah, well. Didn’t wanna bother you, I guess.”

“You being my friend isn’t you bothering me, Carm. It’s the exact opposite. That’s kind of the point.”

“Too late now.”

You drop his hand, withdrawing yours into your lap.

“Yeah, it is. Because you were my best friend, and then all of a sudden it was like you didn’t exist. Do you understand that?”

“I thought it would be better-”

“If I lost you and Michael? Because that’s what it fucking felt like, Carmen. He died, and you were gone. Actually, you were gone long before he died, which somehow was worse.”

He doesn’t know what to say - it’s written all over his face. You don’t break his gaze as you sit across from him, the rest of the restaurant unaware of the heated conversation you’re in the middle of.

Richie brings your first course over in silence, as if he’s sensed the change in mood. He places both of your plates down, squeezing your shoulder gently as he walks away.

“You know you’re allowed to love more than one thing, right? You don’t have to choose between food and me, or between food and your family. You never had to choose. No one ever expected you to,” you take a deep breath, exhaling carefully. “And yet, for some reason, you made yourself believe that you did. And you chose food. And I got left in the dark. We all did.”

He goes to speak, but you cut him off before he can.

“There is nothing you can say right now that isn’t going to piss me off. So don’t try.”

You pick up your fork and begin to eat, trying to focus on the food. It’s delicious, admittedly. Not something you’d usually order, but clearly very carefully crafted. When you’ve finished, you look up at Carmy to find him already watching you.

“How was it?”

You consider it for a moment, making him wait.

“It was beautiful.”

Some of the tension leaves his shoulders. He values your opinion so much, even if he’d never admit it. His brother used to tease him about it, his constant need for your approval. Even as kids.

He nods, not wanting to step over the line again.

“I don’t want to spend tonight fighting with you, Carmen. We can do that some other time.”

“Can we talk about this properly, though? Later, or tomorrow, or something?”

You chew your lip, tasting slight vanilla from your lip balm.

“Yeah. I think we need to. It’s long overdue.”

“Okay,” he breathes. “Yeah. Later. Or tomorrow, or something.”

“Yeah.”

You sit in the silence for a minute, listening to the noise from the restaurant.

“So come on, Carm. Tell me about what’s on this menu tonight.”

He launches into a language you barely understand, but you listen intently anyway. Flavour palettes, texture combinations, acidity and sweetness. You take all of it in, watching the way he lights up with every word.

You wonder if maybe he did make the right choice. Choosing food, instead of you.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

Everything is the same. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing is the same.

@agirlcandream84 @diorrfairy @raging-panda @melancholicmelanin @nolita-fairytale @jacxx2 @huang-the-geek @2guysonascooter @stxxllaaa @an0nym1ss @thereisnoowl @amataadriana @dreamingofleon @gabbycoady13 @stilinskisensation @prongsprincessworld @arieltwvdtohamflash @clairesjointshurt @gnocchisworld @buzzcutlip

[thecapricunt1616]

Dragon Fruit (c.b. one-shot)

Blurb (More BTC!) : It wasn’t that Carmen wanted to have such a raunchy, probably downright perverted dream about using your mouth to keep himself warm while he does paperwork at The Bear. He chalked it up to the fact that his brain was a dark scary place, he didn’t know where these images of forcing your face down until there were tears leaking from your eyes and you were drooling down your chin as you gagged with your nose against his pelvis came from.

♡ One Shot Inspo: Based on ♡this♡ ask from a dear sweet anon, I hope you enjoy it! Dragon fruit, with its vibrant appearance and exotic flavor, holds a special place in ancient mythology across various cultures. In ancient Mayan mythology, dragon fruit was considered a sacred fruit symbolizing fertility and abundance. The fruit’s striking appearance, with its bright pink or red flesh speckled with tiny black seeds, was believed to represent the balance between life and death. ♡ Summary: You tell Carmy about your fantasies of being woken up by him while he uses you, he takes it upon himself to bring that to life. ♡ W/C: 1.5k+ ♡ A/N: WOW 2 one-shots in one day?! it's one of those days yall!! What can I say I am literally anxiety from inside out personified and I think there will be a rush of folks after today due to the new season so I wanted to clear out my inbox as much as I could, I hope you all enjoy this!!! I can't freaking wait for the new season tonight i'm literally writing to distract myself hahah ♡ Warnings for BTC: Smut, Somnophelia, Swearing, Dirty talk, Wet dreams, Ownership kink

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It wasn’t that Carmen wanted to have such a raunchy, probably downright perverted dream about using your mouth to keep himself warm while he does paperwork at The Bear. He chalked it up to the fact that his brain was a dark scary place, he didn’t know where these images of forcing your face down until there were tears leaking from your eyes and you were drooling down your chin as you gagged with your nose against his pelvis came from. 

Well, he did. He did actually know where his dark perverted brain found the fantasy of using your body as a toy. You. You. It was your fucking fault. He never thought before that he would really enjoy something so… masochistic? He wasn’t sure if that was the word, but he knew it made him feel strange at first when you told him sometimes you wish instead of jacking off in the shower before work, that he used your body instead to get off. 

He chuckled and told you it was too early for you and he would feel bad waking you just to get off, and you told him again to just use your body to get himself off. He was dumbfounded for a moment, and asked “while you’re- like…when y’sleepin’?” And when you nodded, his eyes widened a bit. 

“I trust you, and I love you, and I always want to make you feel good. I don’t mind if you use me when I’m asleep… I actually think that’s really hot. I’ve had this dream where I woke up and you were inside me…or that I woke up and you were cumming on my face-“

“Christ babe y’cant…” he adjusts himself in his sweatpants and crossed his ankles over “y’cant say shit like that” he blushed a bit causing you to giggle

“What? Why not! It’s the truth. Remember when I told you I want you to own me? I was serious. That’s so sexy, I love belonging to you” you said and kissed his neck gently. He hummed in response, shrugging. 

“I’ll think about it” he said and went back to scrolling on his phone to avoid any more tenting in his pants. You could hardly fall asleep that night, this being- because when Carmy told you he’d think about something it meant he wasn’t ready to say yes yet, so you hoped that soon you would wake up to being painfully yet euphorically stretched from the lack of preparation, or to cum covering your lips and eyelashes. It actually made it hard to fall asleep, and Carmy already fell asleep, so it’s not like you could ask him for help. 

Instead of rectifying your issue, you just decided to continue pressing your thighs together until you were right on the edge, and then stopping, and working yourself right back up again, then stopping again, until you were so uncomfortably wet you had to allow yourself to cum, and then fell asleep in exhaustion with the hopes or dreams more like it that it would make it nice and easy for Carmy to slip his hard cock inside you come morning. 

It was as if the two of you were on the same horny wavelength - or there was something in the water? Because Carmy woke up the following morning impossibly hard after his dream. The clock read 3:22, great. 48 minutes until he was meant to be up, and his cock was achingly hard, so hard it was pulsing. The kind of ache that said he wasn’t hallucinating and he was on and off having intense vivid wet dreams all night long and had been cycling between hard and half hard all night long. 

He looked over to see you had tossed off your blanket in the night, figures - it’s hot as shit. He hadn’t even bothered with his, he just wore sweatpants to bed and he was fine with that. His eyes rake over your body, you were laid on your back, likely to keep cooler. You were wearing a tight cropped tank top that showed your peaked nipples, he swore at the sight he felt a bead of pre leak out of his tip. He looked down to see.. how fucking embarassing. He’d already cum tonight at least once, in his fucking sleep. There was a large milky white stain covering his tented cock in his sweatpants, standing tall and at attention, ready to go again. 

He shook his head a bit, sighing softly to himself and looking back over at you. His eyes continued trailing down, down, to your panties and woah. He leaned in, ever so carefully brushing his middle finger over your panties to gauge if they really did have a huge wet patch that went all the way up to your mound, and to his demise, in your sleep- still needy as ever attempt to grind into the touch, a soft, satisfied sigh leaving your lips at the found friction. 

He quickly moved his hand back, but remembered what you had said last night, the words bouncing around his skull like a broken record. 

‘I’ve had this dream where I woke up and you were inside me…or that I woke up and you were cumming on my face, I want you to own me’

He swallowed thickly, squeezing his eyes shut, telling himself it was wrong and that you couldn’t really know if you wanted that. But his pounding heartbeat felt like it was everywhere, and it was getting stronger in his cock. He had to do something. He thought about getting up and going to hide in the bathroom and jack off, but no - he figured that could offend you or make you more weirded out then if he was just jacking off. 

Then, he told himself in his mind how he was a man who paid bills in this house so if he wanted to play with his dick in his own bed then he absolutely could and there should be no consequence. But then he told himself that sounded assholish and was back at square one unsure of what to do. 

He knew he had to let his dick out of this cloth prison, though. The pressure was starting to actually hurt. He pulled down his waistbands just enough for his cock to spring out, and it did so in such an aggressive manor that there was a audible small slapping noise when it slapped his happy trail that Carmy didn’t even notice because he was too busy sighing in relief.

The thought of you saying you wanted to be fucked awake crossed his mind, so he figured you couldn’t get mad if he was just looking at you while he fisted his length. So that’s what he did, at first. He reached over to the bedside, pumping lube into his hand from the big bottle he kept on deck for the two of you, and got to work. 

He looked at that wet spot on your panties, wondering what had gotten you all worked up while you were asleep. He wondered if it was one of your dreams that you woke up to being filled with his cum, leaving you dripping the rest of the day. Maybe you were dreaming about him using your folds and your clit to get off, humping you in a spooning position while he whispers in your ear how fun your body is to use. 

He was quickly spiraling down this rabbit hole and not even noticing that he’d sat up, and was looking down at your peaceful sleeping form as he jerks his cock roughly over your stomach, grunts and breathy groans leaving his throat quietly as to not disturb you. He sat on his knees, knuckles brushing your stomach just barely as he fisted his length, breathing getting more ragged. 

You were drawn from sleep to see your beautiful boyfriend, head thrown back in euphoric bliss, veins in his neck popping out “well good morning to you too” you said sweetly and lifted your shirt a bit more so he’d spill straight on your skin. 

“Mm-fuck- morning- let me see y’tits” he rasped the order, slowing down his strokes as his cock stiffened to make sure he lasted a bit longer. 

“Of course” you eagerly took off your shirt, sitting back on your elbows “glad I could wake up to join the party” you spread your thighs, trailing one of your hands down to play with your clit 

“S’not a party- markin my property, remember? Move y’arm wanna cum on y’stomach” he brushed your hand away from playing with yourself which just got you all the more turned on by the way he was using you as you asked him to so many times before. You made sure you angled yourself so when he came just a few more pumps of his broad hand later, it coated your stomach and ribs in white creamy puddles. 

He groaned as he continued pumping his cock to milk out any last dribbles of cum, before dipping his middle finger in the biggest puddle and getting a scoop of the milky seed on his finger. You carefully watched as he drew ‘CB’ on your tit in the arousal, before getting up and heading to the bathroom for his morning shower like it was just any other Thursday morning. But not without ordering you- 

“Let that dry” 

[carni-val]

When you know, you know [Carmen Berzatto]

pairing: Carmen Berzatto x Reader

summary: Carmy has a problem saying I love you, but he's got no problem showing it.

warnings: Slight angst if you squint really hard, some fluff

author’s notes: Yeah, it's been a year since I've written something but my current hyperfixation on The Bear has really inspired me to write. Carmy's struggle with saying I love you is so real, but I sincerely feel he's an acts of service man. I hope you all enjoy it and thank you so much for reading!

She stood at the opening of the door, looking down on him. She worked a full shift and she was still as beautiful as when she woke up this morning. He, on the other hand, looked dishevelled; he was sure of it. His hair was all over the place from running his hands through the mass of curls with a thin sheen of sweat layered over his skin and he was still a little self-conscious about the smell of the restaurant that had clung to him upon his arrival, as Sugar mentioned earlier.

She didn’t seem to mind though as she knelt down on the floor beside him. Overdue invoices and notes scribbled down in his brother’s chicken scratch surrounded him on the office floor.

She was closer now, and yes, still beautiful.

“Hi,” she smiled sweetly.

“Hey,” he couldn’t help but huff out a sigh.

Prepping the menu and serving it to all the customers was more than enough work for the day, especially with the disastrous system Richie insisted on upholding. The bed he’d been dreaming about collapsing into, beside her, seemed to get more and more distant with more of the shit he uncovered in the office. Who knew an office so small could have so much shit hiding in it?

“Still sorting, huh?” her eyes held sympathy for him, noticing how tired he looked.

“Still sorting,” he confirmed, his eyes softening when they met hers. “I think it’s gonna be another long night for me tonight, I’m sorry.”

“Can I help?” she asked, already scanning the documents.

“No, I’m sure you’ve had a long day. Why don’t you go home and go to bed?” he reached out and stroked her cheek with his hand, cupping her jaw with the palm of it.

She leaned into his touch, “You’ve had a long day too, and I’ve got the day off tomorrow. Let me help.” She settled down on the floor next to him. “What can I do?”

Carmy’s gaze lingered on her. If he thought about it all too long, he’d break down, he was sure of it, so he simply asked her to organize the overdue invoices — ones for the restaurant, ones for the inventory and so on.

“Yes chef,” she replied with a cheeky grin.

Carmy felt the laugh escape him before shaking his head. He watched her for a moment.

He really—

He couldn’t bring himself to finish that sentence. Maybe it was something to do with Donna, or the fact that he never really had a girlfriend before her, or because he still couldn’t figure out what the hell she was still doing with him.

His breath caught as he felt a twinge in his chest. He brought a hand up to soothe it and she looked over at him.

“Bear?” her warm hand reached up and pressed against his. “You okay?”

The concern in her eyes stole his breath but it soothed the ache in his chest. He felt a hint of embarrassment, desperately not wanting to have a panic attack in front of her. He didn’t want to scare her.

So he just nodded and let a smile stretch across his face, albeit tight-lipped.

She wasn’t convinced, but she didn’t push him. She just took his hand in hers and kissed his tattooed knuckles.

His smile cracked, revealing his teeth, and it was more genuine. She seemed convinced, releasing his hand and turning back to the work.

“You hungry? Can I make you something to eat?” he asked instead.

“I’m okay, I had a late lunch.”

“Are you sure? It’ll take me a minute.”

“I’m sure,” she smiled up at him. “I just wanna get this done so you can get to bed.”

Her hand reached up and held his cheek this time. She ran her thumb underneath the bag of his eye. After kissing the palm of her hand, they got to work.

After almost three hours of sorting, Carmy excused himself for a smoke break.

“Can I make you something?” he offered once again, standing in the doorway.

She shook her head, deciding that he’d done enough cooking for the day. Although she was starving at this point, she just wanted to get Carmy home and to bed so he could rest.

Although he lingered at the door for a moment, to probably try and convince her, he decided against it, leaving the office with his cigarettes in hand.

She knew he loved to cook for her, always watching her as she took the first bite of anything he cooked for her, but seeing the toll the restaurant had taken on him after only just a week was beginning to worry her. That’s why whenever her stomach grumbled, she let out a cough or ruffled some papers around to try and mask the sound. She knew Carmy would put her before himself and she couldn’t allow that.

She decided she’d eat once he went to bed, or maybe when he got into the shower.

Yeah. The shower seemed like a good idea.

A great one actually.

Spending three hours sorting through paperwork seemed like enough to call it a night — seven hours since she had lunch. Her stomach grumbled again and she could swear she smelt hints of beef, sautéed onions and peppers in the air.

She really needed to get home.

At the thought, the door to the office opened and behind her stood Carmy with two plates, a sandwich on each of them.

“Carmy-“

She began to protest but he stopped her. He knelt down, not having to dodge copious amounts of papers now that everything was sorted into neat, organized piles.

“I could hear your stomach from out there,” he nodded his head towards the kitchen.

A sheepish expression overtook her face as she looked down to the steaming contents within the sandwich.

“This looks and smells amazing, Bear.”

“Tastes even better,” he held out a plate to her.

Eagerly, she took the plate in one hand and picked up the sandwich with the other and took a bite. Flavours melded together to cause a more than satisfactory feeling to overcome her. Her ravenous stomach finally settled while begging for more at the same time.

She hummed as she chewed, nodding her head in complete ecstasy. Carmy laughed, ducking his head and shaking it slightly at her theatrics. She laughed along with him.

His bashful expression made her heart swell. He had never been more attractive to her. Seeing him do the thing he was so talented at was a sight she could never grow tired of. But the drive and determination that oozed out of him as he worked to whip this restaurant into shape opened up a whole new side to Carmy that she’d never seen before. 

She loved him.

Not that she would say it again, because the one time she did, she watched how catatonic Carmy became. After his sincerest apologies, she assured him it was okay.

She decided to let it hang in the air and let him say it when he felt okay to do so.

In the meantime, she’d revel in the ways he showed her.

[noforkingclue]

Hey there! I’m back again with another request (only if you want to write it though!)

I was looking at the prompts you reblogged and thought that this one: "i know what having a crush feels like and this is nothing close..." "have you considered that it's because this is more than just a crush?" "stop talking." might be one that could work for either Tommy Shelby or Carmy from The Bear — whichever you feel it fits better with!!

I look forward to seeing who you choose! Thanks so much in advance if you choose to write it! 🥰

Of course I want to write this!!! I went with Carmy for this because the prompt gave me a chance to torture him slightly...

I hope you like the fic :)

Title: Misunderstandings

Prompt list: list

Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary, @byebyebreezywrites, @spngingerbread21, @layazul, @lov3vivian, @simonsbluee

“Thanks Syd,” you said as you shrugged on your coat, “I really appreciate this. I owe you one big time.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Syd said rolling her eyes but you could see the smile on your face, “you do owe me one.”

“Oi,” you paused just as you were about to leave, “where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

You looked over your shoulder and grinned at Richie. He gave you an unimpressed loo and tossed you a cloth.

“You going to fucking help us clear up or not?” he asked

“Can’t tonight.”

“I thought we’re a fucking team now?”

“Syd let me leave early as long as I come in early another day.”

You tossed the cloth back at him and Richie caught it onehanded.

“And also when did you actually help with closing?”

“I’m always here.” Richie said

“Sitting down and criticising our work isn’t ‘helping’. Now I’ve really got to be going.”

A chorus of goodbyes came from the others. You briefly made eye contact with Carmy and gave him a small smile. He quickly looked away and disappeared into the back. You felt a pang of sadness course through you. However, you didn’t have time to dwell on it. You were going to be late if you didn’t leave.

“So,” Richie turned to Syd after you had gone, “why the fuck was she allowed to leave early?”

“She didn’t say. Although it could be a date.”

A crash from the kitchen made everyone look over. Carmy stumbled out, face red when he realised that everyone was staring at him. The smirk of Richie’s face seemed to widen at the revelation of why Carmy had been hiding.

“A date,” Richie said, “well she kept that fucking quiet. Doesn’t she trust us?”

“Maybe it’s because it’s none of our fucking business.” Carmy said

“I thought you’d be interested in this, cousin.”

“Why the fuck would you think that?”

“With your massive fucking crush on her? Thought you’d want to know who your competition is.”

“I don’t have a fucking crush on her.”

Richie let out a snort of disbelief and Syd raised her eyebrows. A ripple of laughter rose from the others at Carmy’s denial.

“Nah,” Richie shook his head, “we can all fucking see it.”

“I know what having a crush feels like,” Carmy snapped, “and this is nothing close.”

“Have you considered that it’s because this is more than just a crush?” said Marcus

Carmy’s attention snapped over to Marcus who shrugged in acknowledgement.

“Shut up.” Carmy said but the words came out slightly choked

Immediately the rest of the staff burst out laughing. Richie tossed the cleaning cloth of Carmy and said,

“Then why the fuck don’t you go after her?”

“You think you’re in place to give him relationship advice?” said Tina

“And why the fuck can’t I?”

“She’s going on a date,” said Marcus, “You can’t do that when she’s about to see someone else.”

“She should’ve taken him here,” said Richie, “then you could see what you’re dealing with, cousin.”

“Why the fuck would she bring a date to work? That would be a shit date.” said Syd, “See, this is why we shouldn’t listen to you when it comes to these things.”

“Shut the fuck up!”

Carmy leant against the wall and ran a hand over his face as his staff dissolved into arguing. Was his feelings for you really that obvious? Clearly he hadn’t been doing as good of a job of hiding them as he originally thought.

“Besides, we don’t even know if she’s going on a date.” Syd’s voice echoed above the noise

“Wait, who’s going on a date and why didn’t anyone let me know about the gossip?”

Silence fell and everyone glanced towards the door. Carmy’s felt the blush slowly creep up his neck as the two of you locked gazes.

“Turns out my sister isn’t feeling well so we had to cancel our plans,” you said, “so I came back to pull my weight! So, who’s going to tell me what’s been going on?”

[noellawrites]

Souvenir Part 2 - Yandere!Luca x reader

part one linked here

summary: someone pays you a surprise visit at The Bear’s friends and family night.

warnings: baby trapping mention, abortion mention, s2 finale spoilers

It was the night of The Bear’s soft opening and emotions were running high.

You were back to waitressing after having passed Luca’s pastry expertise to Marcus. You were just thankful to be back where you knew you belonged.

Too much time spent at the dessert station just made you think more about your time in Copenhagen and your little souvenir that has been growing inside of you for the last three months.

If you never saw Luca again, it would be too soon.

—

“Hands!” Tina yelled and you approached from behind her at lightning speed, reaching out and grabbing table twenty’s focaccia.

“Fire up three t-bones and four calamari!” Sydney’s voice echoed from behind you as you rushed through the doors and walked briskly towards the middle of the restaurant.

On your way back, Natalie gestured to you from her and Pete’s table.

“What’s up, Nat?” you asked, feeling your nerves being reflected in her expression.

“I have some news for you,” she grimaced, reaching her soft hand up to touch yours gently.

You furrowed your eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

“Richie, uh… may or may not have invited Luca tonight,” Sugar said, wincing at your reaction.

“W-what? But he’s in Copenhagen, that’s… that’s not possible!” you exclaimed, louder than you meant to.

It wasn’t enough that he had to force a baby into you, but now he had to come all the way to America to rub it all in? You wanted to throw up.

“If he shows up, I’m switching to back of house. I can’t handle seeing him right now,” you stated.

“I understand, (y/n). We’ll figure it out,” Sugar promised.

“Yeah, and I’m gonna fucking kill Richie.”

—

“Shit, there he is!” you hissed as you looked through the thin glass strip into the front of house.

“Oh shit, like, baby daddy Luca?” Sydney exclaimed, eyes wide in disbelief.

You nodded, gnawing at your lip as you watched him being seated at the bar. He was already looking around, no doubt searching for you.

You decided to help Tina and take over Josh’s station, since he’d disappeared and Carmy was still stuck in the walk-in. Tina and Syd both knew what’d happened to you and had been nothing but supportive through it all.

As you were distracting yourself by prepping dishes for Tina, you heard the door swing open and hit the wall.

“I thought I’d find you here,” said a voice with a familiar British accent.

“Uh, sorry dude, you can’t be back here,” Sydney stated, pointing at the door and raising her eyebrows at Luca.

As much as you wanted to scream at him, you knew that making a scene would only make things worse.

“Outside,” you said, nodding your head towards the back door.

—

“You never answered my calls.”

“You baby trapped me!”

“You could’ve gotten an abortion.”

“I can’t afford one!”

“Oh, poor you,” he sneered.

You swallowed a sob as you stared into his cruel, intense eyes.

“Why are you acting like this? Why are you even here?” you sniffled.

“I wanted to watch Carmy fail, of course. And visiting you and the baby is an added bonus,” he said, then reached his tattooed hand out to cup your rounded belly over your apron.

“Don’t touch me!”

“(Y/n), come back with me. You won’t have to do grunt work for Carmy or live in that tiny apartment anymore. You and the baby could live with me and you could focus on raising them. And you can work in my restaurant if you miss waiting tables.”

“I never wanted this baby, Luca.” you sighed, shaking your head.

“But I did. I do. So let me take care of everything, yeah?” he said so gently, holding out his arms to you.

You were weak and needy and tired, and you let him hold you close just like he had done three months ago.

[miley1442111]

burnt- s.adamu

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two different sydney requests:

i got so excited seeing syd in the new trailer for the bear s3 😭 need something with reader x sydney bc i can’t wait until june 27!! anything you can think of possibly based on some stuff hinted in the trailer would be great :) thank you so much!!

requesting sydney x reader! feel like it’s been so long since ive seen any content with her, especially because we were robbed of even a glimpse of her in that new teaser they released the other day 😭

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a/n: i hope you both enjoy! thank you for requesting!

summary: your girlfriend doesn't take it too well when she finds out you kept your injury from her.

pairing: sydney adamu x fem! berzatto! reader

warnings: reader gets hurt, burned hand, i think that's it?

---------------------------

Baste, pour, flip, repeat. Baste, pour, flip, repeat. Baste, pour, flip, repeat. God, did Carmen need to yell so loud? 

You looked up for a split second, not even- just a fraction of a half-second, and you felt the burn of the boiling duck fat begin to sear your skin. It bubbled the skin on your left hand, leaving it exposed to the heat of the room and making it so much worse.  

“Fuck!” you shouted, pulling your hand away from the hot stove and turning it off. You held your hand close to your chest with a pain expression as all eyes handed on you. 

“W-what, what happened?” Carmen asked, running over. 

“Fuck you,” you said through gritted teeth. “Why do you fucking shout so loud?” You asked your brother. He rolled his eyes and pulled you to the other side of the kitchen and looked down at your hand. 

“Oh fuck,” Richie mumbled, joining the huddle you and Carm had made. “You’re going to have to go to the emergency room for that one.”

“No fucking shit jagoff,” you seethed. “I’ll grab my shit and drive myself. Get back to service Carm.”

He stared at you for a second. “You sure?”

“I’m fine,” you nodded and he obliged, pressing a quick kiss to your temple like he used to when you were kids. 

---------------------------

The drive to the ER was agony. Every movement of your hand was like a thousand needles being pushed into the skin and the ice pack Carm had given you wasn’t helping.  

You debated calling Syd, but this was her one night off to spend with her dad. You didn’t want to bother her, and you sure as hell didn’t want her to wait with you in the packed ER for the next 3 hours. You decided to just stare at your phone screen and scroll instagram until you were called in. 

Ring, ring, ring. 

Sydney’s contact jumped up on the screen and your senses were immediately heightened. Had Carm told her? How did she know? Maybe she didn’t know… maybe she was just calling to say that she was going to stay with her dad for the night and that she wouldn’t be home, you didn’t know.

“You got burnt?!” she questioned, concern filling her voice. 

“Who told you that?” you asked. 

“Who do you think? Carm! Why wasn’t it you who told me?” 

“You’re supposed to be with your dad tonight, I didn’t want to be a bother,” you shrugged, hearing your name being called. “Anyways, I have to go I’m being called in, love you-”

“We need to talk about this-” 

Beep beep beep. 

You hung up. 

---------------------------

After a painful 30 minute talk with a doctor, she told you that you’d be fine in 4 weeks. She bandaged you up and gave you an antibiotic, in case it became infected. Waiting for you outside was Sydney, with a very mad look on her face. 

“You should’ve called me,” she sighed, taking your not-injured hand. 

“I didn’t want to ruin the one night you had off,” you shrugged, walking out to your car with her beside you. “Plus, it’s not like it’s the first or last time I’ve been burnt, right?”

“Was that supposed to be reassuring?”

“Maybe?” you chuckled. “Look, I’m fine! They bandaged me up and I have antibiotics in case it gets infected, plus I can hold this over Carmy’s head until either of us does something worse.”

“It might get infected?” she questioned and you rolled your eyes. 

“Only if I get lazy with changing the bandage,” you sassed back. 

“Oh, so you’ll get an infection then, great!” She sighed, getting into the driver’s seat. 

“Syd, stop being mean, I’ve been through enough tonight,” you deflated. “Let’s just go home.”

Sydney started the car, driving out of the hospital with your hand in hers.

“I’m sorry, I just worry sometimes…” she muttered. 

“It’s alright,” you nodded, then brought her hand up to your mouth, where you kissed it.

---------------------------

the bear masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games :)

[emotionoitme]

thinking about carmy bending me over his lap and spanking me for being a tease

teehee 🤭 fwb reader as a host at the bear

“i’m not doing anything,” she crosses her arms, coy smile playing on her lips.

“bullshit,” he challenges, shutting the office door “what’s—” he sighs, brows creasing, “-what’s with that outfit?” gesturing to the questionable mini skirt she showed up in.

“what’s wrong with it?” she presses, “you said yesterday we could dress for the heat.”

carmy runs a hand through his hair and takes a deep breath, raking his eyes over her bare legs. she was right, he did say that. he didn’t anticipate, however, how jealous he would feel watching her sweet talk the male customers while sauntering around in a piece of denim that hardly covered her ass.

“you even know how people are lookin’ at you out there? guys?” he asks, jaw tightening. she just rolls her eyes at this, brushing him off.

“no one’s looking at me, chef,” she annunciates the last part, stepping closer, “except you, maybe,” tilting her head to the side. she watches his face grow stern, hoping to further rile him up. he’s silent for a moment, studying her expression, seeing her pupils expand.

“that’s why you wore it, right?” he challenges, further closing the distance between them, examining the way her smirk drops a bit, pout on her face replacing it.

“no,” she curtly responds, refusing to take a step back, her face inches from carmy’s, his breath hot against her lips.

“don’t lie,” he chides lowly, hand coming to rest on her hip, pulling her in. her lips almost touch his, the heat of the small office rapidly increasing. she badly wants to give in and admit her intentions, knowing he would lean in to press his mouth against hers in reward. she retains her resolve, though, eyes flickering towards his plump lips.

“i’m not lying,” she mutters, hazed by the warmth radiating from the man in front of her, hazed by the clean sharpness of his deodorant. it takes all of her strength, but she turns away, distancing herself from him.

“better not be,” he warns, eyes drifting down her form. he knew he shouldn’t be talking to her this way while they were at work, yet he found himself undeniably affected by her presence, trying to bottle it away for later, pants noticeably tighter than earlier. he runs his hand through his hair.

“go back to the front,” carmy directs. the sternness of his voice leaves a prickle over the girl’s skin, meeting his eyes once more, casting over the set firmness of his jaw. she knew what that look meant— the “i’ll deal with you later” glare, his lowered intonation. it did nothing but encourage the girl, wondering how far she’d be able to get under his skin tonight.

“yes, chef,” she breathes out softly, glancing to his lips, then meeting his gaze again. he doesn’t miss the way she bends to his authority, heart pounding in his ears. how much time was left until close? he wonders if anyone would interrupt them if he grabbed her and bent her over the desk, or fucked the attitude out of her. his line of sight follows her as she turns to the door, letting herself out.

she couldn’t deny the heat his words had sent to her core—trying to steady her breath, bringing her hands to her warm cheeks to try and cool them as she makes her way back to the front of house. the girl found that his threatening demeanor inflicted a reaction the opposite of what he had probably intended, instead now plotting her next advance. she glances back through the expo window, watching carmen resume his rounds, barking orders as if he were on edge.

the dinner rush progresses smoothly through the night as the staff diligently works to accommodate the guests, although the influx of customers leaves the front of house short of a few items as the closing hour approaches. the young host makes her way back to the supply closet to grab a few necessities, flicking on the light to dimly illuminate the small space. she spots the bin of spare glassware she needed perched on the very top shelf, inwardly cursing and checking the vicinity for a step stool. she scoffs, finding nothing in the direct area, instead opting to climb the shelf. she hikes up her jean skirt, placing her foot up onto the raised surface, shakily grasping onto the wood as she climbs towards the top. she can almost reach the bin of glassware, perching her leg a bit higher, trying to push herself upwards when she hears carmen’s voice.

“the hell are you doin’?” he asks, eyeing her precariously balanced position, the angle of their height difference with her on the shelf granting him quite the view. she gasps at the surprise of his presence, body unintentionally flinching and knocking her slightly off balance. she clutches the metal railing of the shelf, hearing it rattle under the sudden movement. it looks almost like she would fall, so carmy’s hand instinctually flies up to steady her, gripping onto the back of her upper thigh. he immediately notices the softness of the skin, fingertips teasing the curve of her ass. she jolts at the touch, his grip firmly holding her in place.

“i’m trying to get the extra glasses,” she meekly explains, turning her head to look at him. his brows are furrowed, jaw tightly set.

“there’s a step stool in the office,” he reminds her, moving his hand a bit lower once he notices his current position, trying to guide his eyes away from creeping under her short skirt, “c’mon, get down from there.”

she feels her cheeks heat, self assured that she could complete the task, opening the lid of the container and taking a glass out.

“i just need a few,” she protests, trying not to focus on the warmth of his grip on her leg or the butterflies erupting from her stomach. he sternly says her name, patience wearing thin with the girl.

“down. now,” he asserts, “let me get the stool,” scoffing when he watches her rolls her eyes and continue taking glasses out of the box.

“oh yeah?” his eyebrows raise, leaning to look up at her and catch her eye, “we’re gonna do this tonight?”

heat pools in between her legs at his challenging tone, eager to rouse him, leaning back into his touch with a small pout on her lips. carmen closely watches her with his eyebrows raised, anticipating a response, tensing when she continues to ignore him. he attempts to rationalize his urges, reminding himself that there were still employees clocked in and they were not alone.

even so, carmy slides his arm up her back and around her waist, bringing the other arm to wrap around her legs, picking her off the shelf and placing her on the ground. she cries his name in protest, voice falling flat when she meets his eyes and catches a dangerous glint. he firmly grips her wrist and pulls her as he stalks to his office, dragging the girl behind him. he slams the office door behind them, pulling his apron off over his head, only letting go of her once she’s sandwiched between him and his desk.

she knows where this is going— having wanted nothing more than for carmy to give her some reinforcement, some attention.

“what’s with the fuckin’ attitude today?” he asks, watching her closely, hand coming to her side, “hm? usually such a good girl for me,” his voice is low and gravelly, igniting every nerve beneath her skin, strikingly blue eyes devouring her whole. she lets out a breath, fixated on the plumpness of his lips as she feels his hand creep under the hem of her shirt to caress the heating skin.

“i don’t have an attitude,” she protests far less convincingly than she means to, eyes fluttering slightly at the sensation of his hand sliding up her rib cage and cupping her breast. he scoffs at her response, then leans in to press his lips to her neck, peppering kisses from the curve of her shoulder to the sensitive skin tucked under her earlobe. his thumb brushes over her nipple, feeling her shudder at how the bud quickly perks from his touch. he reaches with his other hand to shove the material of her shirt up over her breasts, marveling at the sight.

“really?” he asks, caressing her soft mounds, seeing her fight a reaction, “cause it seems like you’re trying to get me to put you in your place,” watching as her eyebrows raise and cheeks flush at his completely truthful accusation. she doesn’t respond, just leans further into his touch, eyes glancing away from his as a knowing smirk spreading over the man’s face. he slides his hand back down her stomach, wrapping it around her. he quickly spins her around to face away from him, pushing at the small of her back to bend her over the desk, his other hand gripping her forearm and pulling it behind her, chest flush against the wood. she lets out a small whimper at the swift action, feeling as he presses his hardening bulge against her backside. she can notice her body physically heat up when he dominates her like this, arching back towards his hips, turning her head so her face lays against the wood. carmen releases her arm, then grabs the hem of her skirt and begins pushing it up over her thighs, exposing her ass clad in lace, supple skin enveloping the tight fabric. he quickly palms it, massaging, the softness making his breath catch in his throat, listening to her drawn out whine. his thumb teases the edge of her underwear as he smoothes his hands over her lightly clothed curves, hard bulge against her thigh.

“yes,” she pleads into the wood of the table, heavily exhaling at the warmth of his hand sliding along her gluteus, slightly embarrassed at the compromising position. he lets out a soft scoff in response, eyes gliding over his tattooed fingers grabbing her, pressing into the skin. he doesn’t miss the way she shifts, pushing her ass into him more, her arms stretching out over his desk.

carmen raises his hand, then cracks it down onto the right cheek, gripping the plump skin immediately after to soothe the sting. she releases a cry, pushing further back against him, basking in the hot prickling sensation of the impact. she’s unable to mask the ghost of a smile that prickles at the edges of her lips, having gotten exactly what she sought. his eyes trace over her expression as he raises his arm again, hand flying down onto the other cheek with a sharp smack that sounds through the small office.

“that what you wanted?” he asks in a growl, cock straining against his pants, continuing to firmly press her into the table. she shakes her head and turns away in an attempt to hide the arousal painting her face. “no?” he asks teasingly, smoothing over the reddening skin, “you taking your punishment like a good girl? won’t be all wet when i take these off?” his finger looping through the thin band of her panties, tugging. she hums in agreement, head hazy with lust, only wanting him to spank her more. carmy shoves the fabric down her thighs until they slide to the ground, eyes finding a glistening wetness pooling at her entrance, coating the insides of her thighs in a sticky sheen. he spreads her open, swiping a finger through her folds, slickness soaking the digit. he then wordlessly brings his hand in front of her eyes, showing her how wet his finger was with her juices. she flushes, turning her face out of embarrassment. he grabs her hips, pulling her ass higher up towards him, admiring the red hand prints blooming on her skin.

“you’ve been trying to get me to do this all day,” he taunts lowly, hand wrapping around her throat, leaning in to speak in her ear, “wearin’ that little skirt…talking back,” his bulge throbs against her, and she lets out a whimper. he rubs his hand over her ass once more, then smacks her. she gasps, and he smacks her again in the same spot, gasp morphing into a cry. she reaches back for him, fingertips coming to his thigh, nerves electrified with pleasure.

“please,” she begs, “put it in,” panting, the juices from her cunt soaking into his pants. her body feels incredibly hot, mind only focused on one thing as she pushes back against him rhythmically, making the man grin at how needy she was from what was supposed to be a punishment. he grips her to to hold her in place, reaching down to quickly pull her panties back up her thighs, fabric coming to cover her soaking heat, reddened skin peaking out from behind the delicate lace. he shoves her skirt back down over her ass, then roughly pulls her to stand, ignoring the cry of confusion.

“go finish your close,” he orders, jaw tight, increasingly clouded with arousal. if he had kept her bent over the desk he surely would have given into her desires, providing her with exactly what she wants (and potentially alerting other staff members to what was going on). instead, he remains firm in his decision, taking a small amount of joy in the look of desperation that spread over her features, opening her mouth to protest. he says her name sternly, cutting her off, “you heard me,” pointing to the door, “go.”

she turns, still enveloped in a thick heat of desire, a sting ever-present under her skirt as she attempts to changes her focus to finishing nightly duties.

why do i love mean carmen so much

i’m sorry for my irregular posting!! i have so much going on in my life right now. i appreciate everyone’s support so much <3 it means more than you know

[alisonsfics]

too good to me

pairing: carmen berzatto x reader

summary: after weeks of stress and being on edge, carmy blows up and yells at marcus, but carmy holds such a special place in your heart that you go to his apartment afterward to see how he’s doing

word count: 3.2k

warnings: swearing, arguing, general angst and then fluff

You all knew that something had been on Carmy’s mind. The past few weeks, he’d been more than just anxious. He was really putting his perfectionist tendencies to the extreme. It had been three weeks since officially opening The Bear.

Carmy knew that the first few weeks were crucial to a new business, especially one as volatile as a new-age restaurant. He’d been stressed, which was nothing new for him. But, it was more extreme. He had gotten into an hour-long screaming match with Richie about what specific angle the hostess stand should be pointed.

Everyone was trying to keep Carmy calm, but it had to be done carefully. If he picked up on a tone that was too sympathetic, he’d yell “I’m fine,” and storm off.

With everyone walking on eggshells around him, the tickets for the orders got a little jumbled and in a backwards order.

“Somebody better fucking fix this.” Carmy said, running his hand through his hair. You’d seen him do that move a hundred times, and it usually meant that everything was getting overwhelming. “It’s alright, Carmy. I can handle this. Just go take a quick break outside for me, please?” You asked him.

You were Carmy’s weak spot.

He’d always had a special place in his heart for you. He was wrapped around your finger. If anyone else had told him to take a break, he would have told them to fuck off.

Carmy walked around the corner, where Marcus walked up to him with a new pastry in hand. “Hey, chef. I was thinking we could add a new pastry to the menu for that special event next week?” Marcus asked. It was a perfectly innocent question, especially since Marcus didn’t have any urgent work to be done. In that moment, Marcus was just lacking in reading the room.

“Tonight’s service is a disaster, and you’re wasting your fucking time doing this?” Carmy yelled, smacking the dish out of Marcus’ hand.

That was too far. Farther than Carmy had ever pushed it.

You inserted yourself between the two men. “Marcus, you okay?” You asked him. He nodded his head, but looked down at a small cut on the back of his hand. You placed your hand on his forearm. “Go get that cut washed, and then help Sydney sort out those tickets please.” You said, remaining calm.

“Yes, chef,” Marcus said, walking towards the sink.

Carmy was frozen in place, like even he couldn’t believe what he’d just done. “You,” you started to say, turning around to face Carmy.

“I know,” he said, softly.

“Go home, Berzatto. You need to cool off.” You said, trying to be firm but also gentle. Carmy huffed and ran his hand through his hair again. “But I just…one more—” he started to say.

“Home, Carmen.” You repeated, firmer this time. You called him many things: Carmy, Carm, Bear, and the occasional pet name, but never Carmen.

He walked away, but you heard him slam his hand against the wall as he left.

Still rattled from the whole encounter, you tried to get back on your game. “Syd, you’ve got this,” you encouraged your friend, as she directed the kitchen. The rest of the service was a little bumpy as all of you were still a little distracted.

At the end of the service, you were all silently cleaning up your stations. Normally at this point in the night, you were all catching up and joking around with each other. But instead, you all were recalling the night’s events in your heads.

You lightly knocked on the door of the office, where Sugar was sitting and looking through some forms. “Hey, Nat. You mind if I head out a little early? Richie said he’d clean up my station. I was gonna go check on Carmy and see if he’s alright. I’ve been really worried about him.” You told her.

“Yeah yeah, go for it. I think he’ll want to see you. And it’ll be good for him to talk to someone, and you’re the only one he really talks to.” Sugar told you, pulling you in for a quick hug before you left. She hesitated. “Let me know how he is…I’m worried about him,” she told you, softly.

“I will, I promise.” You said, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. You turned to leave the office. “Carm’s lucky to have you,” she told you as you walked away. You turned backwards as you kept walking. “The feelings mutual,” you added.

You walked up to Carmy’s apartment and knocked on the door. “Carmy, it’s me, please let me in,” you said.

You heard silence on the other side of the door. You fished your spare key out of your pocket and slid it into the lock. You turned the key slowly and let yourself into his apartment.

You walked into his dark apartment. You saw Carmy’s silhouette as he sat on the couch, staring out the window.

“I gave you that key for emergencies.” He said, coldly. You flipped on the light switch, bringing some light into the dark apartment. “I think what I saw earlier calls for a little intervention, don’t you?” You asked. Carmy sat in silence, continuing to stare out the window. You walked around to the front of the couch so you could face him.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He said, still refusing to look at you. Carmy felt guilty about what he’d done. He’d never yelled at you before, and he was ashamed that you had to see him scream like that. Carmy cared more about your opinion than he did about anyone else’s.

You walked towards Carmy, only stopping inches in front of him. “When was the last time you ate?” You asked, blatantly. He leaned back against the couch, trying to add some more distance between you both. He shrugged, genuinely not knowing the answer to your question.

You dug into your work bag and pulled out a takeout box. You stopped by Carmy’s favorite burger restaurant in Chicago to grab him some food. You knew Carmy would sometimes forget to eat when he was feeling anxious. “Eat it,” you told him, handing the box over to him.

He reluctantly opened the box and started eating. You set your work bag on the ground and sat down on the chair that faced the couch.

Carmy shifted nervously in his seat as your gaze was set on him. He was unnerved that you weren’t talking about what happened at the restaurant.

Carmy could normally read you like the back of his hand, but something about your current expression was throwing him off. He couldn’t tell if you were going to scream at him or not.

“Are you here to yell at me like everybody else? I already know I screwed up. I shouldn’t have yelled at Marcus, and I shouldn’t have argued when you told me to leave.” He told you, hoping he could apologize and avoid you yelling at him.

“You know that I’m not here to yell at you. You really fucked up, but Marcus knows that you were just stressed. I’m here to make sure you’re doing okay because I’ve never seen you blow up like that” You said, finally showing your cards. Carmy frowned, looking guilty.

“God, you’re too good to me. I acted like a piece of shit today, and you’re still trying to make sure I’m okay.” He said, still amazed by the love you had for him. He was looking at you like you were his whole world.

He set down the takeout box and used his hand to call you over to him. You stood up and walked towards him, and he patted the seat next to him.

You joined him on the couch. You both were sitting so close together that you were practically in his lap. He turned his body so he could face you.

He let his hand rest on your thigh, feeling more grateful for you than he ever had. You let your fingers caress his bicep, “you deserve to be okay. I want you to be okay,” you said, softly.

You studied his face. You noticed the small bags that had formed under his eyes. You wondered when the last time he’d actually gotten a good night’s sleep was.

You softly brushed his hair out of his face. When he was stressed, Carmy liked to pull on a certain strand of hair right in the front. You knew him like the back of your hand. You noticed all of his quirks; quirks that most people never picked up on.

Carmy watched as you gently tried to soothe him. He was sure you could see the adoration in his eyes.

“I hope you know how perfect you are. You always know exactly what to say.” He said, smiling at you. He pulled your hand away from his hair and interlaced your fingers. He’d wanted to kiss the back of your hand, but couldn’t push himself to do it.

“Do you wanna talk about why you’ve been so stressed recently?” You asked. You were treading lightly, but you wanted to understand what was making him so anxious. You hated seeing him push everyone away, and you wanted to help in any way you could.

He shrugged. “It’s just the restaurant,” he said, not knowing how else to explain it.

“The restaurant is doing amazing though, Carmy. You have no need to stress about that. You’ve been doing such a great job.” You told him, sincerely.

You watched him get a little more nervous. He was looking down at his lap, avoiding meeting your gaze. You ran your thumb over the back of his hand, trying to silently reassure him.

“You can tell me anything, Carm,” you said, softly.

“You just mean so much to me,” he started to explain. You were a little confused as to where he was going with this conversation. The room was silent as Carmy gathered his thoughts.

“Everything at the restaurant has been going so well. Every time my life has ever gone well, something terrible has happened next. I feel like I’m just waiting for everything to…I don’t know, crumble? Losing the restaurant would be terrible, but losing you and the rest of the team would be devastating. You guys are my family.” He told you, his voice cracking with emotion.

Tears threatened to spill from his eyes. You quickly pulled him into you arms, giving him the tightest hug you could. He clutched onto you like he was scared you’d disappear if he let you go.

“You aren’t going to lose anybody,” you said, holding back tears just from watching how emotional Carmy was.

The soft leather scent of Carmy’s cologne occupied your thoughts as you held him close. You both stayed attached like that for a few minutes. The room was silent, but a comfortable silent.

When you both finally pulled apart, Carmy dried the tears off his cheeks. “Nothing bad is going to happen with the restaurant. We’re all family, and that doesn’t go away based on what happens with the restaurant. You will never lose me, or any of us.” You promised him.

You earned a small chuckle from Carmy when you held your pinky up to him. “You won’t lose me either,” he said, dutifully going through with your pinky promise.

You both stared into each other’s eyes, unsure what to say next. The tension in the air nearly made it hard to breathe.

“I should probably get going and let you have the rest of your evening. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You said, standing up from the couch.

You had never felt so awkward around Carmy. Just the task of walking to the front door felt like a giant opportunity to embarrass yourself. Carmy also quickly jumped up from the couch, feeling equally self-conscious.

His hand lightly grazed your back as he led you back to the front door. “Thank you for coming over and talking to me. You really helped calm me down.” He said, sincerely. You smiled and nodded your head at him.

“Make sure to call me if you ever need to talk about anything. I promise that I’ll always be here to listen,” you assured him.

The tension returned.

You both chose to avoid it.

“Well, goodnight,” you both quickly said, at the same time. You rushed out the door, and Carmy closed it behind you.

The door clicked into place and seemingly broke you both out of your trance.

You both realized you had missed the perfect opportunity. The perfect opportunity to finally confess those feelings that had been weighing you down.

You lowered your head, almost shamefully, and started walking down the hallway.

Carmy leaned his head against the closed door, wondering how he could have missed it. The girl of his dreams was walking down the hallway away from his apartment, away from him.

He started to walk towards his bedroom when he suddenly thought “fuck it,” and turned around.

At the same time in the hallway, you had the same thought.

Your heart beating in your ears, you turned on your heel and headed back towards Carmy’s apartment.

Carmy started walking back towards the front door. Before he could reach the door, he watched the knob spin and the door fling open.

You were back and standing in front of him.

Realizing you both had the same idea, Carmy quickly closed the gap between the two of you. His strong tattooed hands cupped your cheeks as he finally kissed you. You kissed him back immediately, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist.

He moved one of his hands away from you, but just a second, so he could quickly close the front door behind you.

He pushed you against the back of the door. The back of your head bumped against the door causing you to grin against the kiss. “Oh, shit, sorry. You okay?” he asked, cupping the back of your head. You quickly nodded your head. “I’m fine, I promise.” You said, grabbing his collar and pulling him back to kiss you.

He smirked against your lips at your eagerness to not break the kiss for even a second. He held onto your waist and pinned you against the door, while you wrapped your arms around his neck and toyed with his hair.

His lips felt perfect against yours. The kiss was somehow everything you’d dreamed of but completely unexpected.

You shifted your weight against him, gently nudging him away from the door. Carmy picked up on what you were doing. You noticed his signature smirk as he guided you towards the couch.

You fell back onto the couch, pulling Carmy down on top of you. All his weight landed on you, causing you to wince. “Sorry, that more violent than it was supposed to be.” He said, sheepishly. He quickly shifted his weight, so he was holding himself above you.

You both were giggly as these little mishaps continued to happen. It suited your relationship. You both had always been able to joke with each other, especially because of your matching sense of humor. It made sense that when you both finally got together that Carmy would accidentally bump your head against the door. But it didn’t make things awkward. You both were so comfortable just giggling with each other.

“Get back here, Berzatto,” you said, connecting your lips again. He quickly obliged. While Carmy loved laughing with you, he had been waiting years to kiss you and wasn’t going to waste the opportunity.

“You look so fuckin’ pretty,” he mumbled as he kissed you. You quickly slipped his tshirt over his head and tossed it to the side.

Then, you both heard a strange muffled sound. You pulled out of the kiss and gave Carmy a concerned look. It sounded like someone was in the apartment.

Your face completely changed when you realized what it was. “Carmy, that’s your phone. You butt dialed someone,” you whispered. His eyes also grew wide. He quickly grabbed his phone out of his pocket, hoping he could hang up and not say anything.

Once his phone was in his hand, he realized it was a FaceTime call and he was now face-to-face with his sister.

“Oh, shit. Sugar?” He said, the shock clear on his face. You immediately held your hand over your mouth, trying to remain completely silent.

“Hey, uh yeah. You called me? Are you okay?” She asked, confused by the whole situation.

“Oh, I must’ve done it on accident, sorry. Listen, I’m really sorry about yelling tonight. I’m gonna come in tomorrow and apologize to everyone though.” He said, sincerely. You were finding it so hard to not giggle. He was on the phone with Sugar while lying directly on top of you, and you just had to stay silent.

“It’s okay, Carm. Everyone knows you’ve been going through a lot. Y/N was going to head over to your apartment. Did you talk to her?” Natalie asked, genuinely invested.

Carmy quickly nodded his head. “Yeah, she came by earlier and we talked. I’m doing a lot better. Yeah, she’s umm—” Carmy stalled as he tried to come up with a lie.

Natalie picked up on his hesitation immediately. “Oh shit. Is she— are you two— wait is she there now?” She asked, putting it all together. You froze, trying to anticipate Carmy’s next move.

He quickly sat up on the couch before pulling you into his lap. “Hi, Nat,” you said, smiling at the camera and bracing for her reaction. You both watched her jaw drop.

“Did my two favorite people finally confess their love for each other? Oh, you guys,” she awed, being able to read you both just from the way you both were blushing.

Carmy buried his face in your neck. He knew how long Natalie had been rooting for this to happen, and he was having a hard time controlling how red his face was.

“You’re good for him. I’m really happy for you guys,” she said to you. You smiled in return and thanked her.

“Well, I’ll let you both get back to it.” She said, winking at you both and ending the call.

“So, how long before everybody knows?” He asked you. You just laughed in response, knowing it wouldn’t be long.

“I think she’s already sent an all-caps text to Sydney and Richie, and the rest of them will know before we go into work tomorrow.” You told him, honestly.

“We could just stay here tomorrow. We don’t really need to go in, right?” He said, pressing kisses to your cheek.

“Would that be the responsible thing to do?” You teased him. He chuckled and pecked your lips. “You know I would spend every second with you, whether it was responsible or not.” He told you.

You giggled, stopping him from kissing you. “Awww we’re only fifteen minutes in and I’m already your biggest weakness? You big softie,” You continued to joke around with him.

“You’ve always been my weakness, sweetheart,” he said, quickly picking up and carrying you to his bedroom.

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[garbinge]

Thanksgiving

Richie Jerimovich x Platonic!Reader mention of Carmy Berzatto x Platonic!Reader

30 Day Fic Challenge (15/30)

A/N: Patiently waiting for June 27th lololol

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Light angst, shit talking, cursing (lots), family problems, daddy issues. Mentions of someone losing their life from alcoholism, homelessness, hitting rock bottom.

The Bear Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @quixscentsposts @dadbodfanatic-x @adorable-punk-superheroes @lodeddiperrodrick @isalver @captainweasleybarnes @musicwithteeth @fancyvoidtragedy @shinebright2000 @knight4xmas @gills-lounge @navs-bhat @cosmicak @kmc1989 Other fics from this universe

The knock on your door wasn’t what you were expecting at 11:30 on Thanksgiving night. You weren’t exactly dressed for company in your pajamas, but the knocking was insistent so there wasn’t a way to ignore it or have time to change. 

“Jesus Christ, I’m coming!” You called out as you made your way to the entrance and opened the door. 

“You don’t look through the peephole before answering the door? I coulda been a murderer.” Richie was standing at the door of your apartment in one of his few nice sweaters with a tote bag in his hand. 

“You here to murder me, Rich?” You stepped back and welcomed him in with a sway of your arm. 

“I’m here to feed you, you weren’t at Thanksgiving.” He didn’t waste any time from when you invited him in and was already in the kitchen placing the bag down. “Why weren’t you at Thanksgiving?” 

You took a deep breath and let out a harsh exhale, this wasn’t something you were expecting to talk about at this moment. 

“Um, I’ve had my fair share of unstable parents lately.” You brought your hand up to your head as the past few conversations with your father flashed through your mind quickly. 

Richie stopped pulling things out of the tote bag and looked up at you. “Your dad call you again? What was he lookin’ for before? Baseball cards right? You should hook ‘em up with the Faks, they got that baseball card scheme runnin’, the stupid fucks.” He let out a laugh and continued to pull stuff out of the bag. 

Any other day, you’d join him in the banter. Any other day you’d enjoy it, but today wasn’t any other day. 

“Richie.” You said his name so solemnly and he looked up at you immediately. It broke you seeing his face drop from a smile to a straight mouthed expression but you didn’t have much left in you to take it back. The next best thing you could do was explain. “Uh, Thanksgiving is just–” you paused for a minute as your brain searched for the right word. “It’s a day for me, alright.” You felt yourself get tense, the emotions that you didn’t want to think about, feel, or simply acknowledge were rising to the surface and it was making you angry. Your eyes closed out of instinct, an exercise to push the rage back down, and after taking a deep breath you re-opened them and stared at Richie. 

Richie’s face didn’t change, it was still as heartbreaking as before even though it would have been described as neutral. 

“How was Donna tonight?” You changed the topic quick and moved over to look at what Richie had in the tupperware containers. 

“How do you think?” It was said like the conversation prior didn’t even happen. 

“Yea, I figured.” You let out a snort. “She make the cannolis?” Your eyes were scanning around the containers looking for them. 

“They’re somewhere in here, let me start putting this shit away and I’ll find ‘em.” He was turning around to face your fridge now. As the door to the cooler swung open, he froze. It went unnoticed by you as you continued to bury your emotions down so you didn’t start a misguided fight. 

“What the fuck is this?” Richie was pointing inside the fridge and then at the container on the stovetop. Despite the cursing, he didn’t seem mad or pointed, just confused. 

As your eyebrows raised and you turned around to see what he was talking about, you answered quickly. 

“Oh, Carmy dropped off food for me last night.” 

“Carmy knew you weren’t coming to Thanksgiving?” Now that statement held a little hurt in it, but you acted like you couldn’t tell. 

“Carmy knows I never come to Thanksgiving.” You added a shrug to the statement to help make it seem nonchalant. 

“I didn’t know you never come to Thanksgiving.” It was mumbled, like he was embarrassed. 

“Why would you?” Another shrug left your shoulders and you moved to help him move a couple things in the fridge. 

“Because I notice when you’re around.” It was such a soft statement that any other time it would have melted you to your core. But you could tell for him it was also like he was defending himself behind this sweet statement. 

The bantering part of you wanted to retort that statement with a ‘clearly not.’ since you hadn’t been at a Berzatto Thanksgiving in over a decade, but with how Richie was talking and where you were at mentally tonight, you knew it wasn’t going to be good for either of you. 

“It’s the first year that we’re–,” you stopped yourself at that statement because you didn’t know what you were and this was not the night you wanted to take the time to define it. “It’s the first year you’d actually notice, it’s not a big deal.” 

“I guess I just missed you, and feel like something important is happening and everyone knows but me.” 

Shocked would have been an understatement. Did Richie Jerimovich just express how he was feeling? 

“You been reading that book?” You frowned, a smile forming slightly on your face as you stared up him. 

“Fuck you, yea I been reading that book.” The self-consciousness flooding his senses at your look. 

“Everyone doesn’t know. Just Carmy.” If you knew the weight the last two words would leave on him, you probably wouldn’t have said them but it was too late, the words were already hanging in the air. 

“And the reason Carmy knows is because he’s known since 10 years or whatever ago.” You hoped that would offer up enough explanation to hold him over a bit. 

“So what did Carmy bring you?” Richie was moving past you to look into the fridge again. 

“Not cannolis.” Moving in the opposite direction you started searching in the bag. 

“I brought too much shit, your fridge is stocked, shit’s gonna go bad.” 

“What did Pete bring this time?” The clicking of the to-go container muffled your question but it was worth it as you pulled out one of 5 cannolis. 

“A fuckin’ pie.” Annoyance was dripping off his tone. He leaned against the counter with his arms crossed. 

Your head snapped at him, your mouth full of pistachio cannoli, surprise written all over your face. 

“That sounds good.” 

“It was fuckin’ rhubarb.” Richie spit out, his arms still crossed and eyebrows frowning as he remembered the pie. 

“God, who the fuck likes rhubarb.” Your face twisted in disgust, the shock fully faded now as the realization that Pete didn’t succeed yet again in his gracious hosting gifts this holiday. 

“That’s what I fuckin’ said. It’s a god damn vegetable.” 

You let out a laugh at that as you took another bite of the cannoli. 

“I don’t know why it’s so hard for him.” Now you were just making conversation. 

“Never was for you.” Richie shrugged as he recalled what rotation of items you’d bring to different Berzatto gatherings. “Hot chocolate, olive oil, those toffee chocolate things, one year you brought those stuffed olives.” 

The shock came back and became very apparent on your face again as you turned to look at him for an answer.

“I told you I notice.” His hands lifted in innocence. “Plus your hot chocolate is the fuckin’ best, hard to forget.” 

“There’s some in the pot.” You pointed to the stove but then went to grab two mugs. 

The two of you melted into a comfortable silence, the tapping of your wooden spoon as it stirred in the pot of hot chocolate, the metal spoons clinking in the mugs as the liquid poured into them. The TV was at a lulled volume in the background, the slight sounds of Steve Harvey’s voice as family feud reruns ran. 

As the two of you were on the last legs of your hot chocolate, Richie spoke up. 

“You watchin’ The Game Show Network?” There was humor behind the question mixed with true curiosity as he heard the old school game show mumbling in the background.

“It’s relaxing.” There was no defense in your voice as you said it, mug close to your face. “And it makes me laugh.” 

“Relaxing and laughing on Thanksgiving. Not sure I’ve seen that combination in a while.” He was opening your dishwasher to drop the empty mug into it. 

You raised your eyebrows at that knowing exactly what he meant and knowing it was 100% true. 

“Hey, you wanna go with me somewhere?” Your eyes were looking at the time and seeing it was just a little past 12. 

“Where? Everywhere’s closed?” 

You had already moved to the other side of oyur kitchen island and were grabbing your coat off the back of the bar chair. 

“Can you pack up like 6 containers from Carmy and like 3 of the containers you brought?” It took Richie a minute to understand what you said since you had been bent down slipping into your shoes. 

Although confused, Richie did what you said, making sure the cannolis weren’t any of the containers he packed in the tote he had brought over. As you re-entered the kitchen, you peaked in the bag and nodded. Quickly you pulled out a ziploc and took one of the cannolis out and dropped it into the plastic before carefully placing it in the tote. 

As the two of you hit the Chicago streets, there were a couple flurries of snow falling, nothing substantial that would stick, but it set a tone. Your one arm was holding onto the the tote back as your hand hid from the cold in your jacket pocket but your other hand moved to wrap around Richie’s arm. 

The gesture made him get out of his head and turn to look down at you. 

“You wanna tell me where we’re going?” He brought his arm in tighter against yours. 

“You’ll see.” 

It was all you were willing to give up as you began walking towards Millenium Park. 

“Millenium Park after 12AM, sounds like a great time.” Richie was taking his free hand and reaching to grab his pack of cigarettes. 

“It actually is.” You spoke with such conviction that it actually shocked Richie. You were so upset earlier and now you were speaking with a hint of hope in your voice. 

The music you started to hear as you approached the infamous Chicago Bean filled your face with a smile. You lived in Chicago most of your life so hitting tourist spots like this wasn’t exactly a common occurrence but this was a tradition you kept for yourself and now were bringing Richie into it. 

There was a street performer about 20 feet from them, the violin was loud and the acoustics were incredible as it echoed off the landmarks around them. The smile on the man’s face as he played was enough to tell a million stories. He was having fun, despite the cold, the snow, the fact it was a holiday and he was here performing, he was genuinely enjoying this. 

“That’s Morgan.” You whispered to Richie like it was a high class secret. “He’s incredible.” You brought your other hand up to rest on his arm that was still holding your other one. 

“He brings a crowd.” He was looking around at all the people that were standing around him. 

“There’s more people every year.” You said it like a proud parent. 

“Every year?” Richie asked, not taking his eyes off the performance. 

There were a few minutes of silence as you debated how you were going to answer his question. 

“I come here every year. One thanksgiving, I was out here looking for something and ended up coming across Morgan. I come here every year now. The crowd used to be like 5 people and look now.” 

“That what the food is for?” Richie was smiling now understanding what the girl was up to. 

Just as he spoke the words, the violin sound was cut and the crowd began clapping loudly. “I’m going to take a short break, be back in 5 minutes.” He waved and placed his violin down to take a sip of the water jug he had next to his stuff. 

You approached the man and before you could even say anything, he was bellowing a deep hello to you. Following his hug he looked down at the food and shook his head. “You’re always over feeding me, kid.” 

“Who doesn’t like leftovers?” You crossed your arms and stepped back slightly bumping into Richie. “Oh, Morgan this is Richie.” You grabbed Richie’s arm and stepped behind him slightly to introduce him. 

“Nice to meet you, Richie.” Morgan spoke curiously.

‘Back at you man, you got a real talent, truly incredible.” He turned on that typical Richie charm.

“You humble me, dude. I’m just a Chicago kid tryna enjoy the holiday.” He waved him off. 

“Did you get to see Sandra this year?” You spoke with hope in your tone. 

“She had me over earlier today.” Morgan was grinning. 

“Morgan, that's incredible! From just coffee last year, to thanksgiving this year!” You leaned forward and tapped his arm. “Guess you don’t need my food.” You teased him and went to jokingly grab the bag back but not before he leaned down and blocked you from it. 

“Hey now, this is top of the line fine dining food you give me.” 

“And I packed a homemade cannoli in there for you.” Richie was smirking at the whole interaction. 

“See the man packed little ol me a homemade cannoli, don’t strip a man of a thanksgiving cannoli, now.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” With a step back you wrapped your arm around Richie’s. 

Morgan looked down at it and back at the both of you with a wider smile now. “Hope y’all had a lovely Thanksgiving.” 

“Think it just got a lot better.” Richie nodded at him and then looked down at you. 

“We’ll let you finish your break, but I’m so happy about Sandra, seriously Morgan, that’s great news.” You went to give him one last hug. 

“Happy to see you out here with someone this year, seems like you finally found what you were looking for.” He was talking at a volume only you could hear as he hugged you. 

“Funny enough, Morgan. I wasn’t looking for it at all. Just happened.” You whispered back.

“The best things do.” He was clearly talking about your friendship, how it came to be out of a time where you weren’t expecting or looking for it all. “Happy Thanksgiving, kid.” 

As you moved back into the crowd with Richie, he took the opportunity to link your arms back together as he asked you a question. 

“Whose Sandra?”

“The woman who has his wife’s heart.” 

The sentence was so heavy, the more thought you put into it, every scenario that it could have been felt more heartbreaking than the last. 

His head snapped to you and you nodded. “His wife died from liver disease and she was an organ donor, so her heart went to Sandra. He’d been trying to find her for a while, finally did, at first they wrote letters, last year she met him for coffee, and this year she had him over.” 

“That’s incredible.” Richie was in shock. “Why Thanksgiving? Or just because?” He was genuinely invested in the story now. 

“Thanksgiving is the night his wife lost her life, but the night Sandra kept hers.” You explained the situation to Richie. 

“Holy shit.” He brought his hand up to his face and wiped it down as the weight of it all sunk in. 

“What’s he doing out here?” Richie frowned trying to piece that part of it together. 

“He kind of lost everything when he lost his wife, his place, his job, his will to live I’d even go far enough to say.” You thought back on the earlier years of meeting Morgan, he was your father’s age, and clearly had experienced loss in his life. That was what bonded you, because while you were going through the biggest loss of your short teenage life at that time, you came across someone who knew what losing someone to alcohol felt like. 

“That’s rough.” Richie nodded and before the conversation could really continue, the sound of the music filled the space again and the crowd moved in tighter. Richie and you stayed near the back and despite everything being fine between you two, you felt the tension from earlier coming back. 

It was hard for you to talk about it, but Morgan’s words about finding what you were looking for were in your head and it made you realize, maybe you could open up a bit about it all. 

One thanksgiving, I was out here looking for something and ended up coming across Morgan. I come here every year now. 

That one thanksgiving, you were out here looking for your Dad, your drunken dad, you later found him at the bus stop across from The Beef. He didn’t see you, but you saw him, fully packed, despite his inebriated state, he had thought through leaving enough that he packed bags. 

With a sigh, your arm squeezed tighter around Richie’s and you said 5 words that you hoped would be enough to explain to Richie why today was so hard for you without having to dive into so much detail. 

“My dad left on Thanksgiving.”