#I’m the worst at responding
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#this might be the most scribble thing I post here yet bahahahahahahahahahahaaha#I still like how the hands turned out even though I didn’t finish them😇#but it’s pretty messy and the hands might be the only part I like🥲#but since this blog is my art journey documentation here you are#I was pretty busy today so no good art but maybe tomorrow we’ll see#I am preparing things to FINALLY answer my asks🥹#& if you tagged me in anything I actually have been meaning to respond!!!!!!!! my notifications are the WORST and so confusing on here😵💫#and I’m technology grandma…#hope u all have had an amazing day !!!! 🫶#my brother in law has been fishing and catching SO MANY sargo#(sargo = sea bream for the animal crossing playing English speakers😙)#AND ITS LITERALLY SOOOOOOOOO DELICIOUS !!!!!#i cook it in the weirdest way possible#you just have to gut the fish and cut off its fins etc#then you put it in a wet salt bed and cover it up…cook it for 30 min…AND VOILA ITS DONE !!!!!#I don’t add any spices…NOTHING…and this fish literally has the taste and texture of crab covered in butter#LIKE…😳 it might be my favorite food/fav thing to cook these days bc it’s so easy and fresh caught fish is just delicious😫#well that was my grandma cooking show of the day👩🍳#now you know how to cook sargo a la sal 👩🍳#also going back to the drawing🥹 I just love these two so much…#I love thinking of sweet moments…most of my angst is confined to writinc😆#the chapter I’m writing right now is SO ANGST DEPRESSING (sorry Eloise)#it will get better…I promise…#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hogwarts legacy oc#hogwarts legacy mc#eloise babbit#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc
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@onenicebugperday Bit of an unfortunate update, but not without hope.
A week ago as of posting this, Green Bean Casserole had a pretty severe mismolt. I think they fell and got stuck behind their favorite stick in an awkward position after leaving the exuviae. I only found and assisted them the next morning, but by then their exoskeleton had already hardened up. Thankfully all of their limbs are intact and functional, but, well... The situation is far from ideal, as you’ll see.
At first I was pretty worried they wouldn’t make it; they seemed to be struggling to move around due to the deformity, falling when climbing and generally looking wobbly. I moved them to a different terrarium set up for my flat headed snake Absinthe, both because of the softer substrate and the lack of skinks that might be bold and attempt to take advantage of a weakened mantis. I wasn’t even sure if food would be able to pass through their system, and they had no interest in prey at all, which wasn’t a good sign. However, with some adjustments to the layout of the temporary terrarium I moved them to, they did climb and manage to hang from the lid with some effort. GBC seemed like they were a fighter, and the day after the bad molt they accepted and ate a grasshopper, so I decided to see if I could get them to their next molt and hopefully allow them to recover.
They’ve since adapted to their new shape, and I’ve moved them back to their usual terrarium for easier monitoring and better sun access. They’re climbing and hanging without falling, eating well, and drinking water droplets from the screen lid when I water the terrarium. I’d say they’re about as close to thriving as they could be in this situation! Here’s how they’re looking today. Ignore the escapee grasshopper in the background, its jailbreak was short lived…
I do feel a bit mean for making this comparison, but…
There’s a bit of a resemblance, isn’t there?
#rambling#insects#bugs#praying mantis#mantis#carolina mantis#they’re doing much better than they were#I’m confident they’ll make it to the next molt#really my only worry is whether they’ll be able to successfully complete it with the unusual shape they have#just have to wait and see when the time comes#overall I’d say it’s kinda just business as usual for them: eating bugs and hanging out watching the world below#and getting watered by accident sometimes#the worst that’s happened since the mismolt was being aggressively accosted by a Texas ironclad beetle#which is to say it had climbed onto the lid and slowly meandered up to them#and they responded by trying to smack it away only to end up falling themselves#the beetle was of course unfazed and continued on its way before climbing back down on the other side#life for the cow bugs is slow and simple…
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@racingliners I’m going to try tagging you on my side blog, but idk if that will work either cause my main is shadowbanned rn haha. I can only see your message up to this notification preview, but of course!!! 🥺
That makes me so happy that my silly organization is helping TRoS in any way 😭🥰 my tags aren’t appearing either so I’ll tell you here, I loved the recent Seb POV snippet interweaving Lewis’s excellent memory when it comes to Seb 🥲 you write sewis so tenderly, it truly feels like a warm hug in word form ❤️ I’m in the middle of reading your recent work for the sebfest and it’s melting me into absolute goo 🫠❣️
#I’m sorry to only respond to like the 1st sentence haha#but truly I think your writing could uplift my worst day thank you for sharing it with us💚#ask!boo#👻
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ok executive dysfunction is kind of ruining my life actually
#i have an incredibly time-consuming project i NEED to finish and i genuinely don’t know if i can#i’ve started which is good but i’m horrifically behind where i need to be and i’m just so overwhelmed#i technically have enough time to finish it i think? but it’s my final project so i literally cannot miss this deadline#my professor is really cool + likes me but it’s already been so long w/out me bringing it up#and wtf am i supposed to say? yeah. i WANTED to work on it. i just chose not to????? like wtf#it’s just so humiliating and i’m so behind i don’t know wtf i’m gonna do#it’s worse bc it’s an animation and it’s gg related and i really really wanted this to be good and i wanted things to be different this time#kind of funny bc i’m actually mid getting an adhd diagnosis rn but it’s just so fucking awful because i do this constantly#it fucking sucks so much i feel so helpless and i don’t know wtf is wrong with me. i’m so tired of letting everyone down constantly#it’s so bad rn i literally cannot do anything. it’s humiliating like WHY can’t i just be a functional normal person#it fucking SUCKS because i KNOW if i had any self control or work ethic whatsoever i could be really fucking successful but i don’t.#so i won’t be i guess.#and i KNOW it’s tied into a bunch of different stuff too but like gd i DO NOT care i just want to be functional#worst case scenario i have an A in the class so if i completely blow it i’ll at least pass? hopefully?#i might be able to talk my prof into an extended deadline but it’s so embarrassing bc i didn’t need one in the first place.#i have literally no excuses#it just makes me so upset because i just keep doing this over and over and i don’t know how to stop it or how to get better#and LOL sorry for posting this here i just feel weird talking to anyone personally about this (+ currently avoiding responding to messages!)#it’s just like. man if i can’t get a fucking grip i will literally waste my entire life. Oh Well! LOL
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The good news is my smart typewriter arrived, the bad news is its battery is deceased
#basically i tried to turn it on right out of the box and it did not respond at all#so i put it on charge and left it for like 10 minutes; at which point it did turn right on when i pressed the power button#i did the quick start stuff and postbox works fine; send to email works fine; all the keys seem to work and it did a firmware update#which fixed the tiny bit of lag the screen had at first#i’m constantly hitting the wrong keys but i do that on any keyboard til i’m used to it. it’s a nice keyboard#the only thing is when i checked how charging was going just now; the battery percentage was still showing 1%. 🧐#it’s been charging for well over an hour and a half#i did a restart and switched to what i think is an optimal charger#(i.e. the usb cable that came with the device + the usb-c wall plug that came with my ipad#not the charging lead for my earbuds + a random wonky samsung plug which is what i was using before)#i’m also going to fully stop bothering it until probably like late in the evening at minimum#i SHOULD be working technically#in my defence i didn’t expect it to arrive so soon. tracking never updated so i thought it was stuck at a random international depot#when actually it made it to heathrow like 2 days ago#look i’m just going to try and count my blessings that everything aside from the battery is working beautifully right now#and if i was a lithium battery left in transit for like 10 days i’d probably die too#worst case scenario i’m just going to have to exclusively use the thing while it’s plugged in. and it has a long cable.. i’ll be fine#personal
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Btw if anyone’s curious… the DM to Logan Sargeant is being drafted as we speak lol then over spring break once I get some liquid courage in me, I will be sending it
#aidia.txt#logan sargeant#formula one#formula 1#f1#I’m delusional#but it’s fine#the worst thing that happens is he never responds
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okay on the one hand this may be 100% my paranoia at it again but on the other hand i’ve tried reaching out to two people i was friends with in the past wanting to get back in touch regularly and both of them haven’t responded in the slightest and the only common point is my ex friend. and now i know “my ex friend is telling people essentially lies to stop them from talking to me” sounds far fetched but the thing is unfortunately i don’t put this past her. it’s not like a huge deal i have plenty of other friends but i was kind of hoping to reconnect with those two because one also got an autism dx around the same time i did and the other is possibly involved with lgbt groups in the area
#do not reblog#it’s just annoying because if they refuse to so much as respond to me i can never#clear things up. and what i’m pretty sure she’s said about me is at best misinterpreted and at worst invented whole cloth#not to mention there are things *i* experienced from *her* while we were still friends that i think these two people#would NOT be very happy about if they found out#sigh. again it’s not a big deal it’s just a little frustrating#i’ll get over it i just needed to complain#c.txt
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Writing over 30,000 words worth of content for a fic only to realize it’s all pointless because you have no interest in it anymore and you were never gonna finish it anyway….
What even is The Point anymore
#current mood#it’s so joever#this isn’t even the worst part honestly#what really sucks is that this project was the last thing in my life I had any sustainable interest in and now that’s gone too.#now I have nothing. like#the fuck am I supposed to do??? get a new interest??? that’s fucking impossible#nothing hits like it used to and everything is just….bland….and SO MUCH EFFORT to get into#like hobbies are so difficult? and my old hobbies (ex writing) are becoming more and more toxic and like a chore rather than something fun#like writing at this point has become a battle of perfectionism and I’m fucking losing#what am I supposed to do. nothing inspires me. I have no interests. no hobbies. not many friends irl#and it’s not like we ever hang out because people are a fucking piece of work#either they cling to you like dog shit or they never respond to your texts no in between#im just so tired of existing??? and also college??? is fine but like#what the fuck am I DOING here like#why am I getting an art degree??? is this really how I should be spending my time and my parents money?#what the fuck am I gonna do for a job??? what do I WANT from a job???? I don’t even fucking know#i can’t see myself being happy in life doing anything and that’s such a nonstarter#it makes it impossible to start planning anything because I feel paralyzed with fear#and like I said….i don’t have any interests. I don’t LIKE anything. I am the antithesis of curiosity and interest like. there’s just nothing#i can’t do this anymore#im so done#idk why I made this so long but#I guess I have a lot on my mind I wanted to share#sorry for cringe posting on main it will happen again#im sorry in general actually for everything im sorry for being needy and attention seeking and annoying and flaky and never finishing any of#my fics because I lose interest and for not responding to anyone in my inbox I’m sorry#personal#cringe#cringetober#long tags
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i’ve watched like a million episodes of this random crime documentary today and this one episode takes place in florida and do you guys remember my former landlord dave with the one leg and the “stop the obama agenda” sign from 2010 on his wall(in 2023) who was originally from florida? well i’m devastated to report that every time the cop featured in this episode says the word “okay” he sounds exactly like him
#i still have this voicemail dave left me once in 2022 which is HORRIBLE because he just goes on and on saying the same stuff over and over#it’s like almost 2 minutes long and a normal person would have been able to say ‘i need to come into your apartment and look at your sink’#(because the guy upstairs is having problems and your apartment might flood if there’s a clog…blah blah blah) in under 20 seconds#and the worst part is he keeps saying ‘okay?’ over and over like he thinks i’m gonna respond to him. like he forgot this is a voicemail#and the other worst part was he was like ‘i know you like to sleep in’ like what the hell are you talking about?#like he thought i didn’t answer because i was asleep. and i actually didn’t answer because i was at ralphs
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sorry for being so inactive omg — i’m so sick rn n all i wanna do is sleep + school is literally kicking me rn 😭
#no cause i just got better like two weeks ago n now i feel fatigued again#which is the worst ughhh#i’m so sorry for not replying to ppl’s texts n mentions#i literally have 0 energy rn but i’ll try to get around to it 😭#i know i said i’m on semi hiatus but i still feel bad not responding omg#꒰ soon you'll get better. ꒱
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extremely frustrating situation
#overly long winded explanation incoming#so i’m gonna be living with two friends starting this fall#my parents bought a little townhouse and we’re renting from them#so they’re getting all of the paperwork and contracts and leases figured out#and these two friends are just. awful with deadlines. horrific. just the worst.#my dad has been flexible but he’s had to keep nagging them again and again to get these forms signed and whatever#and one of them finally finished the whole process and she’s good to go#but the other one still just needs to get the lease signed/notarized with their dad. like. asap. like within a few days.#and i’m trying my best to be like heyyyy sorryyyy not trying to nag or anything but we do need that ASAP…. it should be quick and easy…#i know you’re working double shifts every single day and your dog just died im so sorry#but my parents say you should be able to just go to the bank during a lunch break to get it notarized…..#please don’t be mad at me or my parents for saying we need this Now…… i’m sorry i know you have a lot going on but we do Need that done#right away….#anyway i don’t want you to be mad at me or think i’m just nagging so here’s a topic change! oh you didn’t respond to the topic change.#fuck me then. god. i can’t tell if you’re mad at me or not but i have the suspicion you Are. and that’s making Me mad at You#like god man just come the fuck on already you’ve missed every other deadline up to this point too. can you please just FUCKING get#everything submitted so we can stop worrying about it and just get excited to live together!! because it’s gonna be fun!!#but it’s worrying me too bc like… if this is how they’re acting before we’re even living together#and they’re missing all of these deadlines#am i gonna have to nag them to pay their rent every month?#it’s just frustrating bc it feels like they’re taking advantage of the fact that it’s my parents and not some other landlord#so they don’t think the deadlines my parents set are like. actual deadlines#meanwhile if it WASNT my parents they’d literally be out of a place to live because the housing market is so fucked there#and if you don’t get everything submitted within The Day then you’re no longer a candidate to rent the place#if you can even get to that point in the first place#so like. my parents are being exceptionally flexible and obv i can’t really know what this friend’s thought process is#but it feels like they’re just kinda taking them for granted and taking advantage of their kindness#like fuck dude just please come on
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Freedom of speech crowd is unsurprisingly upset over people who wish trump dead
#they’ll say like the worst things about people then get mad when you say something not even as bad about their thing#it’s like the sibling that annoys you for hours through the day and goes bawling to your parents when you finally tell them to fuck off#thinking about the Kyle Gass thing like JB hasn’t really badmouthed anyone#but I’m thinking of the people saying he was right to respond the way he did#like all Kyle did was express his opinion with a mildly dark joke and all these people start Pearl clutching#meanwhile if you say their racist transphobic sexist etc jokes aren’t funny they get mad at you#like I’m not surprised I’m just tired of it
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say what u want abt childe, but he would let u call him all the embarrassing nicknames and that’s literally all i want in a partner
#didi talks#this is /j but also /srs#u could be like ‘hey bbg what’s for dinner’#and he would perk up and respond immediately like the simp he is#i’m talking ‘pookie bear’#‘sweet cheeks’#‘sugar plum fair princess darling’#anything u can think of and he will respond#with the biggest grin on his face#i hate him.#he’s the worst person ever#makes out w him#‘this isn’t even canon-‘ it is because I said so#im the ceo of childe actually
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pain has veeeeeery suspiciously disappeared from the tooth which makes me veeeeeeeery suspicious bc that’s not good lmfao bc if the pain goes without treatment, it means smth in that tooth has fucking died if I can’t feel anything anymore LMAO. okay if I press hard enough it hurts but it’s nowhere near the sharp ass pain it’s been leading up to this point so! I’m gonna go into that appointment expecting dead nerves and an infection or abscess of some kind. I’m also going in expecting the tooth to get ripped out so! what a day that’s gonna be
#:)#like lack of pain means nerves that were on the fritz the entire time#are not responding anymore#I know this from my tooth hurting. it stops. it comes back. it stops. I get a root canal. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#mind you the one tooth I did have pulled had a hole so fucking big I’m assuming#it just took the nerves clean out at the start#bc that hole got BIG. BIG. I could put my tongue in that thing I had to clean it out after every meal#and I told the receptionist on the phone yeah there’s a hole and she’s like how can you tell#I CAN PUT MY TONGUE THROUGH HALF THE TOOTH LMFAO#but a different tooth HURT so we fixed that one first dmfnfndj AND GET THIS. ITS THE ONE IM EXPECTING TO BE RIPPED OUT#HAH. A FULL CIRCLE. MAN. THAT WHOLE HUGE FUCK OFF FILLING FOR NOTHING#luckily they cap at a certain amount per financial year so it’s $36 or smth and if I go enough and hit the cap I don’t pay anymore which is#additionally the first pulled tooth was a very back molar also. this one is on the other side and on the lower jaw instead#which Could effect chewing a bit#but like the other one I figure I’ll get used to it. so. it is what it is#I’m willing to just say goodbye I just want a photo of it if possible#bc one root canal was like. a worry. bc of how fucking huge my roots are they worried the filling#would push the tooth in and it’d hit nerves and maybe it would reject. alas that did not happen so!#ooc#can you tell we have good luck with teeth in my family#I’m not the only one with teeth missing and technically with how bad mine are they’re still not even the WORST so! silver linings!
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i have such a hard time here and it’s because i literally feel like i do not exist. i will be having a conversation with someone and they just stop responding, stop talking (not a natural lull even) and im sitting there like “hello? i just asked you a question.” or we’re talking and they pick up the phone and just start ignoring me, just surfing social media. or they get a phone call and i’m in the middle of the sentence and they just pick up the call and walk away. like no “excuse me.” and i feel horrible being like “these phones” and like “no one has manners” but jesus, i can literally remember the last time i had a conversation where the other person was listening & paying attention and it was almost six months ago
#t#like i have been iced out just for having a strange demeanor but i really feel like that’s not what’s happening now#and the worst part is i see myself picking up these habits and checking out of conversations because none of them feel worthwhile#and i relate it to place because i simply was not having this issue before i moved. and i imagine (hope) when i move again it will be better#and like i keep having the same conversations because people are just not retaining anything i’m saying to them#i make a plan for dinner and we have to go over it six seven eight times and even then i’m flaked on half the time#idk it just makes me feel very weird & uncertain and half the time i’m like ‘damn am *i* just not speaking i forgot to talk’#and they’re like ‘no i heard you i just didn’t want to respond’ WHAT
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@agent-black-heart that’s my theory too. Do we have any ideas of what could have happened to him while he was out?
#hatchetblr#hatchetfield rp#{this is literally the worst way to respond to asks I’m so sorry}#{it’s been a day}
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