#I’m talking about million knives

[cakechako]

“his body is absurd” and it’s just a guy with massive tits

[b0tsbby]

It only concerns me a little bit I haven’t really seen a written introspection on Stampede Knives’ character, specifically him. 98 is 98 and Maximum Knives has enough elitists on his case to cover him, definitely not a fan favourite but people have broken him down.

I’m aware of how disliked he is, Stampede that is, but it really is something. Could I write it, and could I kill an analysis of him? Most likely. I’ve been injecting the character into my veins, breathing him in and out for a year, every incarnation of him.

But I’m so curious to see someone else do it. Curious to see if someone else will do it…Maybe to convince myself I’m not a complete fool, or stuck in delusion. Maybe to find someone else that got it.

Hate and disdain, is something I’ll never protect him from. He’s an asshole. But man, even he doesn’t deserve the shallow reading of him that’s too widely accepted I think.

But who am I to say what is and isn’t…

[ohitslen]

Rewatching Stampede because yes I have better things to do but also seeing Nai playing “Duet” by himself sounding the same way it did when Vash played with him, he really must have invested a lot of time into pulling that off and it just makes my gut roll in a certain way that I’m just-

[kylermalloy]

Hush. Please Hush

Fandom: Trigun Stampede

Characters: Knives/Vash

Word Count: 1792

Summary: Nai wins.

He succeeds in wiping Vash’s memory and impregnating the plants in July. It’s everything he’s ever wanted.

Now, can Vash just stop asking questions?

Vash remembers nothing. He is still Vash—kind, affectionate. Nai’s little brother. But he no longer harbors any weakness toward the humans. He has no compassion for them. He has no reason to.

He is the perfect Independent.

Read more

[strawberryvixentyphoon]

[anitax26]

Thank you for doing the lord’s work, I was looking for the obligatory Trigun post in the comment section

[kquil]

POLY MARAUDERS | HEROES IN TATTOOS PART 5

05 : DRUNK AND CIGARETTE SMOKE

SUM : It’s been a few weeks and James makes a reappearance in your life, Remus too — they’ve fallen into bad habits. 

G. : modern au ; muggle au ; tattoo artist james potter ; piercer remus lupin ; remus smokes ; drunk james ; reader is sad ; this is a little sad chapter ; fergus is an amazing, lovable manager ; i’m horrible at writing the scottish accent! ; james is an adorable drunk ; james’ car is sexy and red ; remiss has eye bags and smells of cigarette smoke ; uh oh ; it’ll get better soon! 

LENGTH : 2.8k

← PREV. : 04 | DISAPPEAR

You stare in disbelief at the notice that stares back at you mockingly from behind the glass door of the ‘Marauders Tattoo Parlour’. 

‘NOTICE’ it said in bold red sharpie, right above a handwritten message that you recognise as Remus’ neat penmanship, ‘due to personal reasons, Prongs, Padfoot and I (Moony) will be keeping the parlour closed until further notice. We kindly ask that you remain patient as private matters are being sorted through and resolved. We are still open for online and phone consultations to discuss designs and potential future appointments. Kindest Regards, The Marauders’. Beneath the polite and brief explanation of current circumstances was a business email address and phone number as well as working times for phone calls. 

The weeks following your discovery of the boys’ true relationship, you rarely ever passed their parlour. A little over three weeks has passed now and you’ve finally been able to walk past their studio doors close enough to read the notice. You’re frozen in place as dread and worry cultivates shards of sharpened ice to grow within you. Freezing up your senses, freezing up your mind and freezing up limbs. Yet, your heart is racing like never before, your blood pounding against your ears like a drummer gone mad. 

The feeling that settled in your stomach wasn’t a pleasant one, especially when you felt completely responsible for the boys’ sudden hiatus in business. They had often talked to you about how much the parlour meant to them, how it was their best investment and remains their biggest source of opportunity — an opportunity to help people express themselves. It’s a form of freedom that many have been deprived of (themselves included) and they were honoured to now be able to provide that same freedom to others. For them to completely close up shop like this was completely bizarre. 

How long have they been closed for?

You bite your lip and will yourself to move your feet, the ice in your limbs breaking uncomfortably, shattering into a million knives of ice, shooting pins and needles up your arms and legs as if your blood had been frozen up too. As you walk away, you slip your phone back into your pocket, where your hands also remain. 

While contemplating what could have happened to your favourite tattooists and piercer, you made sure to save a picture of their business phone number onto your photos. 

You were never able to call their business number. And you had many excuses lined up to absolve your cowardly behaviour. The main one being that it was their business number, it wasn’t meant to be used for a conversation between friends. Were you even still friends at this point? The thought made you shiver and stole the appetite right from your stomach. It was a greedy little thing cowardice, regret too. They’ve stolen many things from you, your appetite was their favourite thing to purloin, motivation another, happiness as well. Nasty, selfish and greedy thieves. But you weren’t brave enough to confront them and make them stop. And that, alone, makes you their willing accomplice — so who’s really to blame? 

It didn’t help that through this entire ordeal, you’ve realised that none of the boys have exchanged phone numbers with you. To say that you were bitter was an understatement. If they never gave you their number, why would they want you ringing them in the first place? 

…maybe they didn’t have a reason to? You couldn’t remember a single time after the day you first brought them that homemade ���thank you’ lunch where you hadn’t seen them on a regular basis. And now that you were used to seeing them almost daily, your life has since been bleeding of colour and vibrance. Days are dull and monotonous, it’s hard to motivate yourself to do pretty much anything, let alone your job.

“Yer’ve been sighin’ so much these days, I’m startin’ to see wrinkles forming’ on yer cute lil’ face lass,” Furgus comments, nudging your hip with his own as he passes by you behind the counter. 

Flustered, you scramble to get back to work with a quick apology, evidence of your embarrassment heating up your cheeks as you do so, “I’m so sorry Gus,”

With hearty laugh, the burly Scottish man pats you on the back and whispers some reassuring words, “Yer’ve got nothin’ ta worry about lass, I jus’ wan’ed ta see if you were al’ight is all,”

“I’m okay,” you smile grateful for his care only to be met with suspicious eyes and a deep, bearded frown. 

“Don’t grow a habit o’ lyin’ ta me lass, it won’t do ya any good,” his words make more heat rise to your cheeks but you reassure him as best as you can in between taking orders and serving drinks. It was no use however, Fergus saw you as his own daughter, he knew you like the back of his hand and you know that he had his suspicions of your odd behaviour lately — all derived from a sadness he didn’t like you wearing. Thankfully, he decided to leave you alone with your sorrow and regret and focused back on managing the pub. Tonight was pretty average, you saw the regulars and greeted them with a friendly smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes; if any of them noticed, they never said a thing about it to you. Thank god. 

It seemed like it would be another regular night until you caught sight of a familiar figure in the corner of your eye. You had just gotten back from your break when you spot James at a far table, nursing a pint and buried under a sheet of suffocating misery all on his lonesome. 

“James?” you breathed in disbelief with a wide-eyed stare directed right at him. 

“You know that guy?” Bonnie, your coworker, asks in a whisper into your ear and you had no choice but to nod your head in confirmation — you’ve already outed yourself, there was no point in lying, “well he’s been drinkin’ himself to death for the past hour or so, what’s gotten into him? D’ya know?”

“No…” you’re a liar. 

“Well ya be’er find out or else imma have ta kick the poor bastard outta ‘ere,” Fergus comments, his arms folded over his large chest and his brows knitted together in disapproval. 

“May I—…?” you begin to ask softly, sending a curious look towards Fergus who meets your eyes with a small smile and a wink. 

“Consider yerself off fer da night,” with a smile, you thank him and take a breath before making your way over to the miserable tattooist. 

“Angel!” James smiles happily at the sight of you, his drunken state adding an adorable dopiness to his already charming grin, “It’s you~” he coos and wraps his arms around your middle to bury his face into your stomach when you were close enough, “I missed you so much, angel~” he sighs, his voice muffled by your clothes as he refuses to detach himself from you, “even if this is just another dream…” you barely hear him and you almost curse yourself from being able to because his words make your heart drop to your stomach. 

“James,” you ask softly, “can you please get up?” 

“Why?” he shuffles to press his chin into your lower belly and stare up at you with those sweet hazel eyes of his. The sneaky bastard, he knows how weak at the knees you become from his simple stare. You’ve never told him so and often put in the effort to not show it but you know, he knows. 

“Because you need to go home,” he gives an incredulous look at your reasoning and he’s adorable doing so, even in his drunken state. 

“Why would I need to do that when you’re right here?” he slurs and hiccups, your heart pounding erratically at his words.  

“James please—”

“No!”

“James—”

“‘m not going home! I wanna stay here with you,” he presses his face into your stomach again and sobs into your clothes, “you’re gonna disappear again,” he sobs miserably, “I don’t want that…” 

“Please just let me call you a taxi James?” he doesn’t respond, pressing his face further into your stomach as you comb your fingers through his dark hair, you touch gentle and comforting, coaxing him into some compliance, “remind me of your address again and I’ll call you a taxi, okay?”

“NO!” 

You suppress a defeated sigh. 

It takes several minutes of coaxing until you’re finally able to take his phone from him. He refuses to let you call him a taxi and you weren’t going to force him to walk home alone in his drunken state so you’re going to have to do the one thing you can think of that’ll guarantee his safe return home. Not that you’ll enjoy it because it means confrontation. 

“Can you tell me your passcode, please, James?” you ask in a gentle whisper, only to him, “I need to do something very important on your phone,”

With a large smile he recites the digits, “22nd of the 6th, 17,” the way he says it makes your raise a brow. Sensing your curiosity, James answers your silent question, “is the day Moony, Pads and I became official,” he giggles adorably to himself as you smile somewhat sadly — another reminder that you should stay away. You don’t say anything to prompt him further and, instead, type in the code before looking through his contacts. It takes you a moment but you’re eventually pressing call and waiting patiently for Remus to pick up.

“…James?” Remus’ familiar, kind voice speaks tiredly through the phone and you don’t know whether to breath a sigh of relief or worry, “Hello?”

It takes you a moment but you finally will yourself to speak, “Hey, um, Remus?” 

“…Dove?” he’s in complete disbelief and it’s evident in his voice, “Is that really you?”

“uh…yeah,” you chirp sheepishly and Remus is all forms of elated but his excitement dwindles quickly when he realises how you’re able to call him. 

“Why do you have James’ phone?” you were right to call him, knowing that he was preceptive, reasonable and easy to talk to even with the tension in the air. Patiently, you explain the situation, never taking your fingers away from James’ hair as he practically purrs into your form, adoring the physical contact and muttering to himself happily. It’s especially loveable like this, considering that it’s him being dopey and giggly and not anyone else.

“Oh…” Remus sighs, clearly disappointed, “I’m so sorry, darling, I’ll get him right away,” 

“It’s no trouble, Rem,” it was hard not to cringe when the familiar nickname easily rolls off your tongue. As if nothing happened — oh how you wish for such a reality!

“Just tell me where you are and I’ll be right over,” you don’t know if you’re just imagining it but there’s a considerable shift in his voice, he sounds much softer after hearing his nickname easily fall from your lips. 

“We’re at the Boar and Elephant pub on Chapel Road,” 

“Alright, I’ll be there soon,” with a click, he was gone and you were left to keep James satisfied until he got there. It wasn’t an overly tough job; James seemed perfectly content nuzzling into your stomach with his arms hugging you in place as your fingers massage his scalp and gently groom his hair. He’s like a puppy, eager to receive affectionate cuddles and pets. If he had a tail, he’d be wagging it like crazy and you giggle to yourself at the mental image it conjures up. 

“I missed that…” James mutters, maybe to himself but it wasn’t clear.

“I’m sorry?”

“I miss the sound of you giggling,” you don’t know what to say but he continues, going off on a tangent, “it’s so pretty, you’re so pretty. It’s like the sound of a cute little bell ringing…so pretty— pretty pretty pretty!” you can’t lie to yourself, he’s absolutely precious, “I miss you so much angel, why did you go away? I don’t want you away, I want you with me, and with Remus and with Sirius too…” he murmurs something into your stomach that you weren’t able to pick up but don’t press him further on the matter, fearing that your heart might just about burst if you do. You can’t afford to hope for such a fantasy with them when it could never become a reality. 

It just wasn’t possible…

“Not fair!”James whines, making grabby hands at you as Remus, with the force of a gentle giant, manoeuvres him into the back seat of a red Jaguar XJR. Dealing with a defiant baby was a struggle so dealing with a giant, beefy baby like James Potter was like trying to control a hurricane. But Remus had a magic touch and arguably had more of a silver tongue than Sirius did so he made it look like a walk in the park. It was astounding, “I wanna be with my angel!” James sobs as Remus closes the door on him, putting a stop to James’ needy cries. 

“She’s not yours, she’s no one’s,” was Remus’ response even though he had already closed the door, James unable to hear him and the hint of dismay coherent in his tired voice, “thank you for looking after him, Dove, you’re always too kind,”

“N-no, don’t worry about it,” he smiles down at you, silence filling up the space between your two lonely figures under the amber lamplight. He doesn’t seem to mind the hush in conversation but knowing that his eyes were fixed on you was unnerving, “so! Is that your car?” you ask, desperate for a change in conversation; your restless fiddling making your intentions obvious but Remus keeps to himself. 

“No, no, it’s not mine,” he answers with a short chuckle, “this is James’ car,”

“Oh…” you hum to yourself thoughtfully, eyes carefully examining the body and model of the car, “I see,” it looks like a car James would have, you think to yourself. There was more silence until Remus finally brings himself to commence your farewells. 

“Well I suppose I should head off, I don’t want to take up too much of your time,” your heart stutters, almost to a stop, at his words, even more so when you see him hesitate upon leaning down. A victim to your own habits, you find yourself closing your eyes and awaiting his gentle kiss goodbye against your temple.

…But it never comes.

“Goodbye then,” he calls over his shoulder, and rounds the car to get to the driver’s seat. 

“—Do you smoke?” you suddenly ask, in some part desperate to extend your interaction with each other and other parts curious of the lingering cigarette smoke you smell on his clothes, masking his usually comforting fragrance. It’s strong enough that you were able to catch it from your formal amount of distance with each other and it struck you as odd. You had never seen him smoke before. 

Remus laughs a brief and strained sound as he looks at you from over the hood of the car, did he always have such deep eye-bags? “Not usually,” he sends you a sheepish smile once you’re finally able to meet his eyes, “but I’ve recently taken to it again,“ he sees worry and grief fill your eyes and hurries to correct himself, ”—But don’t worry, Dove,” his features are gentle and kind, warm and… forgiving, “I’m okay,” 

The world slows as you watch him bend his head to sit in the drivers seat. It’s been too long. For you, at least. This can’t continue. It scares you to think about where this may go if you leave it to late. It’s only been three weeks! If this is the result…you dread to think about what would happen if things went on for longer than that. James is drinking himself to death. Remus is smoking cigarettes. What about Sirius? Your stomach twists uncomfortably, painfully, your heart too. 

“No! You’re not!” you shout, tears of anger welling up in your eyes as Remus stops and looks over at you once again, his breath hitching when he sees your eyes glistening with tears, “you’re not okay…” 

“Dove—”

“I’m coming by tomorrow,” you announce, “at lunch,” this was a commitment you’re making, a commitment to him, to them. Even if you’re heartbroken, that doesn’t give you the right to be a bad friend. You brave a watery smile, “I’ll make your favourites…so you better be there!”

→ NEXT : 06 | SELFISH DESIRES

A/N : i’m so sooo sorry for my depiction of the scottish accent, i really tried my best, please don’t hate me! if you have any ideas of how i could make it better, please say so, i’d really appreciate it. Also, i know that this isn’t completely fluff but we’re getting there, you’ll have to wait and see in the next chapter! 

NAVI. | HEROES IN TATTOOS MASTERLIST

TAGLIST : @melinajenkins @aastonishment @until-i-found-you @corp0real @celestcies @lovelydoveval @inlovewithremusjohnlupin @calums-betch @futurecorps3 @hihihi1112 @simpingforthe80s @yrluvjane @chaosofmanyfandoms @storyofaromance @loving-and-dreaming @somewereinthegalaxi @ashreblogsficshere @cassandra-nerezza-black @stray-bi-kids @ttkttt @notasadgirlipromise @desikudisworld @volturissideslut @arilxup88

@ghostgardn @mess-is-my-aesthetic @zesnuts @enamoredwithbella

@susyelectra @fangirlninja67 @pagesfalling @thepunisherfrankcastle @axeofwars @imarimon @in-love-with-4-marauders @chicken-taco-burrito @valencia-rou @feast0nmeee @lestat-whore @hvmxjjk @twilightlover2007 @diaryofabiwoman @woohoney @celestialfantasiess @willbedecided @lovelyygirl8 @iiirhiane-g @mangodamochiii @queerqueenlynn @l3xiluve @brain-has-left @bunbunbl0gs @kneelforloki @citrusiove @virtualbuni @awkward-d3rs3-dr3amer @that1nerd-20 @wolfstar4everbitches @skepvids @dearmy-diary @littledollfacebaby @mylifeisnothing @em16cor @krazyk99 @imdoingbetternow @realalpacorn @remussbitch @swiftieeras1989 @lonely-nerd-sodaholic @canthavetoomuchchaos @rckstrbee @b-i-h-i @ennycutie @kneelforloki @theteaobsessedbug @padfoot1313 @d1gital-data @venezsuwayla @melllinaa

[alannak14]

rock bottom ౨ৎ L.W

Leah x Aussie!reader

description; reader hasn’t been showing up to training nor messaging her national teammates so they tell Leah, her girlfriend.

warnings; self harm, depression, bed rotting ig.

౨ৎ

rock bottom.

it means to be at the lowest possible level.

That’s exactly how I feel at this very moment. I haven’t been to training in a week, I haven’t showered in 4 days, and I haven’t messaged any of my teammates in 3. 

it feels impossible to do anything, let alone breathe.

My room was a mess; plates, bowls, knives, forks, and any other cutlery littered my bedside tables. Drinks, such as iced coffee or any energy drinks, were stacked in the bowls.

it felt like i had hit rock fucking bottom.

My girlfriend Leah had tried calling and texting to see what was going on, but I simply ignored her, not on purpose but simply because I didn’t have the energy, and at this very moment, lying in bed, I had forgotten I had given Leah a key to my house.

Well, that was until I heard my front door unlock, open, and then shut again. I didn’t even have the energy to see if I was about to be robbed. All the thoughts racing through my head finally stopped once my bedroom door had opened, and I heard a voice utter a soft

"baby?"

I had turned my body around, facing the door, to see Leah standing there with a bag in hand. There was one familiar look in her eyes after she had looked around my pigsty of a room.

Pity.

God, I hated that fucking look.

Leah walked closer towards me, she sat the bag down on the ground, since that was the only free space, she kneeled down and place one of her hands on my cheek. “We’ve all been worried about you, love.”

I look up into her eyes; the comforting blue eyes that tackled all my problems. “What’s going on in your beautiful head?” she whispered so quietly that I almost didn’t hear her.

I just shrugged, not having any proper words to answer her question. I watched as her gaze softened, she tilted her head.

“are you okay?” she tried again.

i shook my head.

“i will be, though.” i muttered, my voice croaky since i hadn’t had to talk to anyone for a couple of days.

She nodded, not knowing what she could say, but i could see in her eyes, that she wanted to ask a million questions.

“y/n… why haven’t you shown up to training.. and please don’t bullshit me.” her voice was stern, like she meant business. she knew i was going to lie, so it was a stupid question.

“i’ve been sick, Leah.” i replied, hoping she’d buy it, news flash. she didn’t.

“don’t lie, Y/n.”

i huffed, saying very fast. “i’m tired, Leah. so. fucking. tired, so i’m sorry if i had a couple of days where i just wanted to not train.” the way i said it sounded full of attitude and snark but it was the truth, i was tired.

i was waiting for Leah to scold me for the attitude that littered in my words, but she didn’t.

“that was all you had to say.” She said softly, while stroking my somewhat greasy hair. “you need a shower, love.” as soon as she said that, you could see my face change.

“i’ll help.” Leah said quickly after seeing the distaste on my face. all i could do was nod.

Leah pulled back the covers, helping me sit up by putting her hand against my back. I stood up from my bed, watching where i put my feet due to the rubbish that covered the floor around my bed.

Leah and i walked into the bathroom, she was the first one to start getting undressed, her hoodie being the first to go. i stood there, regretting the fact i agreed to shower while she was here.

Not because i didn’t want her to see me naked, but because i was afraid of her reaction to what remained under my clothes.

She turned to look at me, her eyebrows furrowing, clearly confused as to why i was still fully dressed. She went to grab the hem of my hoodie but i stopped her.

“what’s wrong?” her eyebrows furrowed even further, which was nearly impossible. i just bit my lip.

“please don’t be mad.” i forced out, my voice shaky. her face went from rested to confused, she licked her lips. “why would i be mad, darling?”

and with that, my vision blurred over, my eyes filling with tears, Leah quickly moved her hands from the hem of my hoodie to my cheeks, cooing softly. “oh, baby..”

she wiped the fallen tears, leaning forward to kiss my forehead, murmuring against it. “i could never be mad with you, love. never.”

i wiped the tears from my chin, relaxing my arms, leaving them by my side. i nodded at her, telling her, she could take my hoodie off.

Leah obeyed, lifting my hoodie over my head. once she had seen what filled my wrists, her face dropped.

“y/n…” she whispered, grabbing my hand, getting a closer look at my wrists and the cuts that were littered on them.

“i’m sorry.. i’m so sorry, Leah.. please don’t be disappointed.” i rambled out in one breath, she shook her head, croaking out. “why did you do that to yourself?..”

i shrugged once more, tearing up once again, what i didn’t know was that Leah’s eyes were filled with tears, just as mine were.

i expected Leah to scream and shout at me, what i didn’t expect was for her to bring my wrists up towards her mouth, pressing her lips against my scars, it was soft, like she was afraid to hurt me.

“i’m not mad at you, y/n, i’m mad at myself because i wasn’t there when you needed me to be.” she muttered against my wrists, that broke me. i felt like i could cry.

i moved my wrists from away from her mouth, bringing my hands to her cheeks, leaning our foreheads against one another. “it wasn’t your fault, Leah..” i uttered, trying not to cry.

in return, she pecked my lips.

we let go of one another, she hesitated at first but once i nodded, she continued to undress me, my bra, my trousers, my pants and then my socks.

we got into the shower, standing under the shower head, Leah turns the shower on. We stand under the water together, letting it grace our skin.

“i’m sorry for not texting you or showing up at training.” i spun my naked body around to face Leah’s naked body. she shook her head.

“don’t be ridiculous, you’re struggling, don’t ever apologise for struggling, y/n.”

i nodded once again, she smiled at me and i smiled back, probably the most genuine smile of mine in a while.

“i’ve got you, love. you don’t have to do this alone.” Leah stated, wrapping her arms around my waist, bringing our bodies together, i lean my head on her shoulder, uttering a soft “promise?”

to which, she replied with a “i promise.”

[jules-loves-lukecastellan]

i have a request for luke taking care of you on your period 💗 thank youuuu :)

| luke castellan x fem! aphrodite! reader

౨ৎ warnings ౨ৎ: periods (??)

౨ৎ summary ౨ৎ: you’re on your period and luke takes care of you. (ik i said aphrodite reader but that doesn’t play into the plot at all so feel free to change it <3)

“I never knew you could be this scary…”

you were dying. a million knives stabbed into your body as you cried out for help. that’s what your period felt like to you. cramps made you want to end it all. you were laying in your bed, not DARING to move because even if you moved a muscle, your whole body would ache like someone stabbing you with a sword over and over again.

“what would happen if i just ended my life?” you thought to yourself. “these cramps would sure go away.” as you were talking to your inner-self about k*ll*ng yourself, you saw luke, your wonderful, amazing boyfriend lay down beside you.

“hey princess. what’s got you so tense?” luke asked, about to hug you. “get. your. fucking hands. away from me.” you said in a very serious tone while making a very serious face. luke instantly retracted his hands and his expression changed from happy to worried. “what happened angel? are you sick? did i do something wrong?”

then, all of the sudden, you started bawling you eyes out while barely getting out, “n-no i’m on my st-stu-stupid period and you didn’t h-hu-hug meeeeeeee!!!” you cry with big tears streaming down your face and off your chin.

luke registers what’s happening and automatically scoops you into his strong arms, kissing your tears away. “hey hey hey. it’s ok. i’m sorry. i love you so much sunshine. i’m sorry i didn’t hug you.” he says in a very empathetic tone. you continue to cry and he continues to whisper sweet nothings into your ear until you stop crying.

you sniff and shakily say, “sorry babe. i’m just hurting and i hate life.” “no no it’s okay. i don’t blame you at all. it’s not your fault you deal with these cramps!” he says hugging you and kissing your neck. just then, he had an idea. “i’ll be right back angel. i’m not leaving i just forgot something in my cabin ok?” he asked, making sure it. was ok to leave you. “ok..” you say a little suspiciously.

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆

as luke is walking out of your cabin, he think who to go to about this stuff. then it hits him like an arrow hitting the bullseye. clarisse and annabeth. first he goes to the athena cabin to see annabeth. he knocks on the door and coincidentally, annabeth answers. “oh hey luke. what do i owe the pleasure of?” she asks curiously.

“hey annie. i was wondering if you had any of those uh.. things you stick in to stop from bleeding? i think they’re called tampons?” he asks while whispering the word “tampons”. annabeth rolls her eyes at his slight immaturity and shut the door in his face.

just as luke is about to walk away, the doors opens again and annabeth stands there with all kinds of tampons. “before i give these to you, who are these for exactly?” she asks, cocking a brow. “oh. they’re for y/n. she’s on her period and im making her a bay basket.” (i mean bay basket cuz like its summer and bay yknow? i thought it was clever lol).

“oh wow. that sucks for her. tell her i say feel better .” annabeth says before smiling and shutting the door. next, luke went to clarisse. he was just about to walk towards her cabin when he found her irritating a kid. “hey clarisse that’s not nice. knock it off” luke says, giving the kid a chance to run away. “whatever luke. what do you want?” clarisse asks as she starts walking back to her cabin.

“well y/n’s on her period and i’m making her a bay basket. i was wondering if you could help me get some stuff she might like since you’re her best friend.” luke says, fidgeting with his hands. as soon as luke says “y/n” clarisse’s mood instantly changes to happy and she energetically exclaims, “of course i’ll help you! i love y/n.”

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆

luke is walking back to the aphrodite cabin with a basket filled with a pink fluffy blanket, a whole bunch of chocolate, tampons, a squishmallow (don’t ask how he got all these “human” things from camp half blood lol), fake pink roses (so they never die), a candle, and some extra goodies like his hoodie and matching pajama pants with him.

he knocks on the door and you open it, looking angry at who disturbed you. but your expression softened instantly when you saw it was luke. you pulled him inside as he presented the bay basket. “surprise! you should not be going through this much pain on your period so i hope i could make it a little better.” he said while smiling from ear to ear.

you look at the basket and then at luke as you take it and set it down. you walk over to luke and throw your arms around him, jumping and wrapping your legs around his waist. “thank you thank you thank you!” you says while crying because of how happy you are.

the rest of the day/week is filled with luke, luke, and more luke until you’re finally done with pain (for now hehe).

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆

౨ৎ a/n ౨ৎ- i hope that i fulfilled ur request lol <3 i had sm fun writing this!! feel free to request any more u want!🫶🏻🫶🏻

-jules🎀

⋆𖦹.✧˚taglist⋆𖦹.✧˚

@t0byisher3 @simrah1012 @mimisamisasa @lizziesfirstwife

[carmyberzattosjournal]

Entry 8: FM Static

Bearblr Promptober Day 8: Autumn Leaves

Summary: In which Carmen has a panic attack in front of his girlfriend for the first time.

Warnings: Panic attack, swearing, trouble breathing, mentions of vomiting, written with fem reader who is a trauma surgeon (nothing gross described) in mind, she/her pronouns.

Notes: All journal entries will be titled as such and tagged with #cb journal.

Reblogs appreciated. Thank you to @carmenberzattosgf for putting together this prompt list.

GIF by @hotch-girl

08 Oct 2024

The wind sounds different through autumn leaves.

It’s high pitched, crisper. Bit like an out-of-tune radio. Less an adagio, more an allegro. The skittering sound they make as they somersault across the sidewalk has quickly become one of my favorites to pick out among street noise, so much so that I’ve begun walking home without headphones in, something my girl isn’t thrilled about because car horns and sirens will fuck up your hearing pretty bad. But it’s just for the fall, while the leaves are crunchy and tumbling around. Not like a kitchen is a quiet place to work, either.

She tucked my hair behind my ear.

“I’d love to know what you’re smiling about, sweetheart,” she said.

“Just. Sound of the leaves,” I said, gesturing to the few cartwheeling across the trail in front of us.

We were taking a walk in the park near my apartment on a Sunday morning, before it got too busy. She does this thing where she hugs my arm and intertwines our fingers while we’re out. At first, I thought it was to stop my nervous fidgeting, but she likes tracing her thumb back and forth over the inside of my wrist, over the scar on my palm, so I think it’s sort of her form of nervous fidgeting, you know?

“Yeah?”

I could hear her smiling.

“Does it help at the restaurant, sweetheart?”

“Finding sounds to focus on?”

“Mmhm.”

I took a deep breath. “I don’t know? I-I still get really wound up. I still forget to breathe. Sometimes, it feels like my stomach is turning inside out. Sometimes, it feels like I’m going to explode, but I don’t, but then I hurl after service.”

Her eyebrows crinkled together. “Oh. Oh, honey, that sounds terrible.”

I nodded, tried to say something about the leaves to keep the conversation moving, but the words got caught in my throat. I squeezed my eyes shut. Wriggled my hand out of her grasp to press my palms to my cheekbones as the sights and sounds of the kitchen invaded. Doors. A dropped plate. Refire these steaks, 8 minutes behind, get the fuck back to work, call outs, chefs, keep the pace up, every second counts. My chest tightened, throat killed, head swam, and the leaves—they sounded too far away. And it was too warm, it was always too fucking warm. Pressure on my shoulders that I yielded to. Someone was talking to me, who the fuck was trying to talk to me?

“…can hear me, you’re in the park,” she murmured. “You’re not at work, sweetheart. It’s Sunday, you’re taking a walk in the park.”

Something about her voice didn’t seem real, okay? It was this ethereal, weightless thing, not because of its pitch or volume, but because of how effortlessly it flowed. It existed separate from the grimy, gritty, loud, bright, boiling world, from my dry and oily skin, from the callouses on my hands from the knives, from the jagged pain that threatened to burst through my spine. It was somewhere else. She was from somewhere else. My sky would fall on her. I was the other shoe.

This is where she leaves, right?

Cold hands clamped around my wrists. “Carmen? Carmen, baby, you’re not breathing. I need you to breathe.”

That prompted me to empty my lungs and heave for air. My heart pounded so hard, I was convinced she could see it, my head spun, I couldn’t seem to get enough air in, it was a million degrees, my teeth hurt. She pried my hands back, something rough and papery hit my fingers.

“Can you tell me what that feels like, Carmen?”

“Don’t call me that, Nat!” It hissed out between my teeth before I could stop it. A vice clamped on my throat, and then I couldn’t breathe. Fuck. Why couldn’t I breathe? Why was the world still dark? Where the fuck even was I?

Hands sized my jacket lapels and shook me. “Breathe!”

I gasped for air.

“Good. Good. Keep breathing, sweetheart.” Something dull and cold on my chest. Her hand? “You’re okay. You’re okay, I promise. You’re safe.” The papery thing touched my hand again. “Keep breathing. There you go.”

It hit me that I’d just had a panic attack in front of her, and my stomach flipped. She kept the thing pressed against my hand while also rubbing circles over my chest. I pinched it between my fingers. Tried to. My hands were trembling so bad that I couldn’t tell if I was holding it or if she was. Some kind of a ridge. Another. Another.

“Uh, ridges?” Fuck me, I sounded like I was about to cry.

It took her a second to respond. “Mmhm. Ridges. What else can you feel?”

I felt along the edges. Skittering sound of the wind blurred into my periphery. “It’s a maple leaf.”

“Mmhm.”

It snapped when I bent a lobe of the leaf. Disintegrated into nothing when I rubbed it between my fingers. I blinked my eyes open, squinted against daylight. Then realized the ground took up too much of my view. How long had I been crouched on the gravel?

“S-sorry. Sorry. Shit, um…” Where. The fuck. Are my words?

“It’s not your fault.”

“I’m-I’m-I’m getting better, I promise.”

“I believe you.” She finger-combed my hair off my forehead. “Do you want to take your jacket off for a few minutes? You’re really warm.”

Yeah. Yeah, that was a good idea. I hauled myself up, she followed, I shrugged off my jacket, cold air slammed into me like a physical thing because I was sweaty, and, as if abruptly awoken by my alarm, the rest of the world snapped into focus. Distant traffic, arguing birds, a barking dog, conversations that I couldn’t make out, solid ground, frozen spots on the backs of my shoulders, my sides, singing of a wind chime. FM static from the leaves. I needed to hold her? Don’t know what came over me, but I needed to hold her, and it took her by surprise because she made a cute little squeak when I pulled her in for a hug. She smoothed her hands over my back, pressed a kiss to my neck. Her nose was cold.

“Do you feel like talking about it?”

“No.” I responded too fast. “No, I’m-I’m gonna freak out again.”

She kissed my shoulder. Swayed me gently. “That’s okay. Maybe we try decompressing for now, hm?”

I nodded. Turned the broken leaf over and over in my fingers as she held me.

“Um, tell me a story?”

Another kiss to my shoulder. “What kind of story do you want to hear?”

“Um. I don’t know, something that makes you happy.” It still came out sounding like a question.

She drummed her fingers along my back for a few long moments while she hunted for one. “So, my mom has this dog, right?”

“Mmhm.”

“She’s a rescue, so we don’t know what breed she is, but she’s tiny. Minuscule. She’s like 8 pounds soaking wet, right?”

“Wow. Really tiny.” I watched some leaves flip around as they blew by.

“She loves the fall because, uh, my mom will rake up the leaves in the backyard into this big pile.” She wandered a cold hand into my hair, and my eyes drifted closed. Fuck, it felt good. “And she has to go barreling full speed into the pile,”—I started laughing—“like not jumping into it, she just sprints through it, and they go flying. And she’ll just do that over and over and over again, having the time of her life. And then my mom will rake them back into a pile the next day, and off she goes. It is. So fun to watch.”

“It does sound fun.” I squeezed her tighter, almost felt like we couldn’t be close enough, almost like I needed her hands on my skin. Maybe she understood, because moved her hands to either side of my neck. Stroked my throat with her thumb.

She pulled back enough to meet my gaze. “You’ll have to visit her, yeah? See Cookie running through the leaves.”

“The dog’s name is Cookie?”

“Yes. She’s teeny and she’s got sandy colored fur with some brown spots like a chocolate chip cookie. So, we named her Cookie.” She kissed my forehead. “My mom’s cool. Promise. But feel free to mull it over.”

I nodded.

Tried not to think about what meeting her mother meant for us because if I did, then it meant something horrible would follow. It always did.

[fairy-writes]

REAL OR NOT REAL

Reblogs and Comments are greatly appreciated!!

__________________________________________________________________________

Fandom(s): Trigun Stampede

Pairing(s): Vash the Stampede x Reader

Word Count: 0.9k

Genre(s)/Tag(s): Gender Neutral!Reader, Reader is Short, Use of Various Nicknames (smalls)

Notes: I’m also taking this concept from The Hunger Games.

PART ONE HERE

__________________________________________________________________________

After three months, your memories of Vash still haven’t come back.

You ended up visiting the doctor who had discharged you, and he reassured you that they’d likely come back in time.

But you were impatient, and Vash was losing hope that you’d ever get your memories back. That much was obvious. He put on a show that he was fine, but you had the feeling he did that so as to not worry anyone.

He was succeeding in anything but that.

Nicholas noticed. 

Meryl noticed.

Roberto noticed. 

Hell, even you noticed!

So, Meryl came up with a game of sorts. She knew about your strange dreams and the odd flashes of déjà vu you’d get around certain things. Thus, the game “real or not real” was born. It was simple, if not a bit dumb, but it allowed you to voice your thoughts and feelings better than before, so you put up with it. You’d ask a question, like if you had been somewhere before, and then ask, “real or not real?”

More often than not, it was real to some degree. 

Vash came alive at the chance to talk about your previous memories. A small smile played at his lips when he spoke about your adventures. The shenanigans you’d get into. Some of it was before you met Meryl, Nicholas, and Roberto. But you found your heart thundering when he grew near. Your palms grew sweaty, even more so than in the desert sun. You liked it best when he would answer your questions. 

Was this what it was like falling in love with Vash?

“You’re killin’ me, smalls! Just get out!” Nicholas complained as you paused in getting out of the van. Meryl had stopped for a bathroom break in a small town, one you didn’t know the name of. 

“We’ve been here before, real or not real?” You ignored him in favor of asking as a wave of déjà vu washed over you. 

Soft sunsets. 

A declaration of love.

A gentle kiss. 

“Real, though you might want to get out of the van before Wolfwoof gets upset,” Vash said good-naturedly as he clambered out behind you. Now that you were slowly grasping at your fleeting memories, you were more comfortable sitting beside Vash. So, you’d all end up alternating who sat where just to give the middleman a break. Nicholas spills out with a few choice words in your direction, but you pay him no mind. Instead, your eyes are locked on a small tavern just on the edge of the town. 

“You took me there once before, real or not real?” You whisper to Vash, who chuckles and rubs at his undercut, 

“Real,” He says cryptically, not elaborating like he usually does. You frown and look up at him, but he avoids your gaze. 

What was up with him?

After a few minutes, Meryl exits the tavern, having relieved herself and ready to return to the desert road. 

“Actually… Meryl, would you be okay if we stopped here for the night?” You ask hesitantly, and when she stops, you elaborate, “I feel like I have missing memories here.”

At that, she readily agrees, much to the chagrin of Nicholas and Roberto. 

You were supposedly on a time crunch to make it to July, where a man named Millions Knives would be waiting. 

But you weren’t about to pass up on this opportunity, so you wander. Some faces are familiar, some aren’t, but something about this place makes you feel warm and fuzzy. You pass an alleyway where you swear there's the ghost of fingertips at your hips and a mouth on yours. 

But nothing comes of it, so you move on. 

Only to realize you’re being followed. 

At first, you think you’re seeing things—a flash of red fabric here, a smidgeon of blond hair there—but you aren’t stupid. You pick up on what’s happening rather quickly. Ducking down the very alleyway you had passed before, you ignore the phantom brushes of gentle caresses in favor of waiting. 

And when Vash passes by the alley, your hand darts out as quick as a whip and snags his jacket. He yelps as you pull him into the shadows with you. 

He’s close, blue eyes wide behind his glasses and lips parted in shock as he nearly falls into you. He barely manages to catch himself with his hands. 

“You’re following me. Real or not real?” You tease and see a pretty pink flush color his cheeks. He laughs awkwardly, 

“Alright, you caught me.” You grin,

“Well, you weren’t exactly being subtle about it. That coat of yours is hard to miss.” You say and release his coat. 

But he doesn’t move.

Your heart skips a beat as he looks down at you. He looks at you as if you hung the moons in the sky. You remember the feelings you had when you passed this alleyway and got into this town. 

Soft sunsets. 

A declaration of love.

A gentle kiss. 

“You told me you loved me here. Real or not real?” You whisper and see his eyes light up. 

“You remember?” He whispers back, just as softly, if not more so. All you hear is your heartbeat in your ears. Vash is impossibly close, leaning down slightly to meet your gaze as he searches your eyes for any hint of a lie. 

But you wouldn’t lie. 

Not to Vash.

“I’m starting to.” You say, stretching up on your tiptoes to kiss him. You gently hold his face as he starts in surprise. It takes all but a split second for him to respond, and he’s desperately kissing you back like when you first woke up. 

The only difference is this time, you don’t pull away. 

[cakechako]

*twirls hair and kicks feet* i know a radioactively toxic red flag when I see one

[azrielsdove]

Love and Loss: Ch.9

Warnings: Violence, Angst

Ch.8 Here | Ch.10 Here

***

“Rhysand!” Azriel bellowed into the night, wind and rain lashing his face. He didn’t even feel the cold seeping through his wings, mind entirely focused on finding the pathetic excuse of a male. His shadows were searching wildly, waiting for any signal that the High Lord was near.

A flash of lightning illuminated the sky, showing the winged figure flying quickly away. Azriel growled, darting towards it. All rational thought had been ripped from his brain as he flew through the heavy storm, dark anger clouding his vision. He didn’t think twice before sending his shadows out and wrapping them tightly around the other males wings.

Rhysand gave a shout of pain as he tumbled a short distance before breaking free of the shadows. “You don’t want to go against me, Azriel! I won’t go easy on you this time.” His sneering words only fueled Azriel’s rage, the memory of their fight five hundred years ago pushing him along.

He wouldn’t let Rhysand sweet talk his way out of this one.

“You’re disgusting, Rhysand! What sick game do you play as your mate hides away from you? You think she will truly love you, seeing what you are?” Azriel hovered feet from his brother, watching the violet of his eyes blaze.

“You will never understand the bond Feyre and I have. I can offer her the world, and I intend to do so. Where is your mate, Brother?” A wicked smile crossed his face.

“Oh, that’s right! I married her.”

Azriel didn’t hear the yell that ripped from him as he shot towards Rhysand, hands wrapping around the High Lords throat. Those violet eyes flared before a rush of darkness pulled Azriel away, locking his wings to keep him from flying. He was plummeting to the ground, the rain like knives against his skin. He broke free from Rhysands power with a great roar, rocketing back up to where he hovered.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” He yelled, a blue light of power hurtling through his brother’s wing. Rhysand gave a great cry and fell toward the woods below, his remaining wing flapping wildly. He winnowed at the last second, landing easily a few feet down. Azriel landed next to him, hands curled into fists.

Rhysand managed a laugh, looking over the Shadowsinger. “You truly think I didn’t realize? That I didn’t know the second you came to me, begging I leave her alone? I saw it then, even if you didn’t.” He flared his injured wing out, wincing even as his fae healing was already working through it. Azriel’s mind was reeling, processing the words Rhysand had said.

He shook his head. “No. I’m done with your games Rhysand. Nothing you say is credible.” Rhysand smirked again, the never-ending arrogance rolling off him.

“I enjoying pleasing her in front of you, watching how jealous you would get. Do you enjoy the sound of her moans? Her cries?” He took a step closer, pure evil on his face. “Too bad she will never forget the way I touched her. How can you compare to the High Lord?”

Red flooded Azriel’s gaze and he was on top of his brother in a second. Rhysand was taken aback by the speed at which he moved, his shock allowing Azriel to pin him underneath his body as the Shadowsinger began punching his face in. “You. Are. Nothing. To. Her.” Each word was accented by his fists meeting the handsome face of the High Lord, rain and blood mixing together.

Azriel didn’t care if he killed him.

Rhysand was trying to use his power against Azriel, but the sheer force of his incessant pummeling was rendering the male unable to focus. Rhysand had the fleeting thought that he may die like this, at the hands of his own brother. Perhaps he deserved that.

A shout came from somewhere else and Azriel was ripped off of Rhysand, a voice that sounded a million miles away yelling at him. He was thrown to the ground as a blurry figure tended to Rhysand, seeing how bad his wounds are. Azriel wasn’t aware of the tears streaking down his face, drawing paths in the blood that had splattered from his brother. He didn’t feel the burning pain where his hands had split open to the bone, the force of his attack on Rhysand so extreme.

He sat there in the rain as Rhysand was carted away and the figure approached him. The far-away voice was calling his name, shaking him to get his attention. Even if he wanted to respond, he couldn’t. So there he sat, red staining his skin and rain soaking him to the bone.

“Oh, that’s right! I married her,” playing in his mind, over and over.

***

READER POV

You sat by the window, watching the sky outside. You felt that maybe the gods had chosen the sudden storm to match your emotions, tears running down your face in time with the rain. How could everything have gone so wrong so quickly? You knew better than to trust Rhysand’s words, you knew you never should’ve believed he might change. He was cold and cruel, and that was that. You felt like a fool for allowing hope to enter your mind.

And Azriel…your chest tightened as you thought about him. Something about him felt so right, so different from Rhysand. He had been the one you could wholly trust, until tonight. Your heart ached at his betrayal. How could he allow you to enter a marriage that he knew was wrong? The small voice in the back of your mind reminded you of Rhysands manipulation tactics, how good he was at getting you to do his bidding. You were certain he pulled the same to Azriel.

It didn’t matter, you told yourself. Azriel had been a part of this lie, the last five centuries all a lie. You were humiliated, hurt, and terribly sad. Rhysand had been your everything for so long. You were chalking up his behavior to what happened Under the Mountain, to his mating bond with Feyre. You didn’t think it would come out that he was always like this.

Your heart broke for your younger self, the innocent girl who was in love with her High Lord. Your heart broke for yourself now, for the love you thought you would find in Azriel. Only to be broken by finding out his part in the lie of your life.

Loud, incessant knocking broke you out of your thoughts. You ran to the door and opened it, assuming you would find Azriel. Instead Cassian stood in front of you, blood covering his hands. “You need to come with me. It’s Az.” Your tears dried instantly as you followed him out of the house. The blood…what had happened?

Cass lead you to where Azriel sat on his knees in the rain. You gasped at the bones showing through the skin on his hands, the blood covering his body. “He won’t move. I can’t get through to him. It’s like he’s disappeared inside himself. I found him out here, with Rhysand.” You looked sharply to Cassian, wondering what the High Lord had done this time. Cass shook his head.

“Azriel was on top of him, beating him to death. If I had arrived a few minutes later I don’t think Rhysand would have made it. I don’t know what happened, but you need to try to get him to talk. I know Rhys has been awful, but he can’t murder the High Lord.” You shuddered to think of the repercussions of that. As much as Rhysand probably deserved a good beating, his death would cause problems through all of Prythian. Likely, it would cause Azriel’s own death as well.

The thought made you sick.

You cautiously walked over to Azriel, kneeling in the wet grass in front of him. A chill ran through your body as you took in his destroyed hands, the mix of his and Rhysands blood on his body. “Az?” He didn’t respond. You moved to be in his line of sight, trying to get him to focus on you. You shoved down the feeling to jump at his empty eyes, instead pulling his damaged hands into yours. “What happened, my love?” Your voice was a whisper, a plea to the gods to help him.

You turned back to Cassian. “Bring me the healing kit from the cabin. I’ll try to stop his bleeding, see if that can help him.” You hope he didn’t notice the slight shake in your words. Your attention went back to Azriel while you waited for the supplies to fix his hands. “I know you’re in there, Az. Please, look at me.”

Silence.

Cassian was back, handing you the kit you had requested. You pulled out a needle and thread, the action too similar to just a few hours ago with Rhysand. How had everything gone so wrong in such a short amount of time?

You used the wet skirts of your gown to wipe the blood away the best you could before carefully stitching him up. “You did not cause the downfall of my marriage,” you began, needing to fill the horrible quiet. “I understand his manipulations all too well. As hurt as I am that you knew he was lying, I know how easy it is to be trapped in his games.”

You moved to the next hand. “In it all, I was always drawn to you. You were my closest friend, the breath of fresh air I needed. I wonder now if I was drawn to you for another reason. If my heart somehow knew I had chosen wrong, that you were the one for me.” A sad laugh escaped you. “How pathetic, isn’t it? You were there all along, and I didn’t see you.”

You finished the second hand, pulling bandages out to wrap over the stitches. “You’ve always been there for me, Az. My protector. And I was allowing my husband to torture you for 500 years.” You shook your head. “I should’ve seen it sooner.” You held his now-bandaged hands in your own, looking up at him.

You nearly jumped out of your skin to see him looking back.

“What i’m trying to say, Az, is I love you. I love you deeper than I ever thought possible. When i’m around you I feel complete, like part of my soul is home. It’s always been you, hasn’t it?” You gave his hands a gentle squeeze, hoping he was feeling the same.

He stared at you.

Your confidence faltered. “Please, say something. Anything.” You would rather he reject you than continue being this shell of a person. You needed to see that he was going to be okay.

You felt sick when he pulled his hands from yours, still not saying anything. You ducked your head, hot tears sliding down your face. Was it too much all at once? Maybe you shouldn’t have thrown that at him, when he was clearly in no state to receive it. You moved to stand, embarrassed by what had happened.

Hands gripped onto your waist, pulling you forcefully down to the Shadowsinger. You gasped in surprise, looking up at him. He dipped his head down to yours, capturing your lips in a hungry kiss. He kissed you like it was the last thing he would do, the only thing he could do. You fisted your hands into his soaking shirt, welcoming the taste and feel of him. He pulled away once you were both gasping for air, resting his forehead on yours.

“I love you. I’ve always loved you,” he whispered, hazel eyes shining. “I never should have allowed him to even look at you.” The words came out in a growl, and you couldn’t deny the heat that flickered in you at his tone.

“It’s not your fault,” you soothed, raising a hand to cup his face. He leaned into your touch, eyes fluttering closed.

“It is. I could’ve stop it. Should’ve stopped him.”He moved his head, pressing a soft kiss to your hand. “I knew you were made for me.”

You ignored the skip in your heartbeat at his words, at the implication they held. Now was not the time to delve into that. “Come home with me, Azriel. Away from this place.” He nodded, eyes still closed at your touch. You wrapped your arms around him and began winnowing the two of you away to Velaris.

***

Rhysand healed perfectly fine. He went to Feyre the next day, and their mating bond was sealed. Of course, no one told you this. You knew when you woke up in pain, a searing burn traveling down your arm. You had raised it in fright, certain you had caught fire.

Instead, you watched as the marriage tattoo disappeared from your skin.

He had released you.

It didn’t bring you the joy you thought it would. Not when Azriel was still half of himself, a ghost in the dark. His shadows interacted with you more than he did. You brought him food and drink, all of which he left untouched.

Cassian returned once the business at the camp was over, concerned for his brother as well. “I’d never seen him in such an uncontrollable rage before,” he said, drinking the coffee you had made. “He was someone else in that moment.”

You sipped from your own mug, thinking over everything that had happened. “Azriel knew. That Rhys was only using me. I imagine 500 years of anger can turn a person irrational.” Cassian murmured his agreement, the two of you standing in silence.

You sighed, turning to the stove and setting your mug down. “Will you take this to him?” You asked Cass, handing him two bowls of soup you had just finished. “He won’t take anything from me. I think he’s too ashamed. Maybe he will eat with you?”

He took the warm bowls, nodding. “I’ll try.”

You gave him a grateful smile and started cleaning up the dishes you had used. Cassian left, determined to get Azriel to eat. You hummed as you cleaned the kitchen, lost in thought. You were concerned Azriel was going to wither away to nothing, in both body and mind. You couldn’t seem to get through to him. You were beginning to wonder if Cassian was able to when you heard a loud bang and shouting coming from down the hall.

You paused, looking towards the doorway. Azriel appeared in it, eyes wild. Cassian was a few feet behind, waving his arms at you. “Go! You need to go!” You didn’t understand why he was so panicked.

“What is wrong?” You asked, looking between the two males. Azriel moved closer, caging you against the counter behind you.

“Did you make the soup?” His voice was low, eyes dark. You nodded, unsure if he was upset with you or came to say it was the most delicious meal he ever had. “Why would you do that?”

You blinked. “You haven’t eaten. Why should I let you starve?” You looked behind him to Cassian, who seemed prepared for a fight.

Azriel leaned closer, nose dragging along your neck. “You really shouldn’t have done that,” he growled, breath fanning over your skin. You couldn’t help the way you arched into him, the way his touch drove you crazy.

“Why not?” Your voice was shaky, his hands coming to rest on your waist. Your eyes caught Cassians behind him again, shifting on his feet.

“Apparently,” he started, clearing his throat. “You two are mates.”

***

this may end up being slightly longer than i thought….but still close to the end!! i’m sorry this chapter took so long to get out!! please let me know what you think <3

Taglist: @amara-moonlight @tothestarsandwhateverend @onlyangellh @hnyclover @greenapplesaucepi @just-a-social-casualty-1 @heyyitsnat21 @mirandasidefics @bubybubsters @mybestfriendmademe @thaynarajejheje @brujitafantomatico @justdreamstars @thisblogisaboutabook @lees-chaotic-brain @abeltownshipslittlebitch @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @fxckmiup @its-sam-allgood @miluiel1 @nickishadow139 @hailqueenconquer @mika-no-sekai-blog @books-hlmc @stonerpersona @starsinyourseyes @meshellexplosionmurder @acourtofbatboydreams @captainsbaby @anuttellaa @val-writesstuff @isavanhoni

* crossed out blogs it wouldn’t let me tag! if i missed you this time please let me know if you’d like to be tagged :)

[umbrella-show]

Solo Mission

Platonic Yan Rottmnt x Sibling Reader

“No. And that’s final.” Raph sternly determined, looking down at you with crossed arms and a frown. “I barely let Mikey go out on his own mission. But you? Not in a million years.” “Why?!” You outrageously exclaimed, obviously upset by the stubbornness of your older brother. “I know how to take care of myself!-” “No. You don’t.” Raph interrupted you, “you don’t know how to fight. You don’t know how to defend yourself-” “Yes I do!” You took out your own weapons, your kunai knives. Small sharp throwing knives you used to defend yourself. Your brothers begrudgingly gave you a weapon to defend yourself, after you begged for one, making the compelling argument of possibly needing something to defend yourself with when they weren’t around.

“I helped you guys with Meat Sweats, Hypno, Big Mama, AND Draxum. I can handle a solo mission!” “What’s going on over here?” You and Raph looked over to see Leo, leaning on the wall and looking over at you and Raph in puzzlement. “Lunch is also ready by the way. Mikey made lasagna.” At the mention of his name, Mikey’s head peeked over from the next room where the kitchen was. “Food’s ready!” Raph let out a huff from his nose, looking back at you with narrowed eyes, his decision unwavering. “No solo missions. Not until you’re ready.” You scoffed, watching as he walked away to the kitchen, Leo shortly following after him giving you one last curious glance. You already knew he would ask Raph about your argument while you weren’t there, which made you even more irritated. You weren't a defenseless child. You knew how to use your weapons. You could totally complete a solo mission all by yourself, without your brother’s help. It enraged you how many times you had brought up the possibility of a solo mission to any of your brothers, and they all shot it down with the only argument being ‘you’re not ready.’

“You alright?” You looked up at Mikey, your cranky mood slipping as your face softened towards him. You let out a sigh, feeling the anger lingering. “I’m gonna eat lunch in my room.” You muttered, walking past him without another word. You went to the kitchen, wordlessly grabbing a plate from the cabinets. Raph and Leo were there as well, and you shivered as you felt them glance at you. You heard fragments of their conversation, quiet whispers from mostly Leo. You sent them a glare while they weren’t looking. You knew they were talking about you, and your previous anger sparked up again. You made sure to be extra loud, closing the cabinets with a thud and quickly scooping a portion of Mikey’s homemade lasagna on your plate before storming to your room. Your feet slightly stomped against the floor, speed walking to your place of comfort.

You threw the curtains, which acted as the door to your safe space, closed once you entered. You sat on your bed with your head laying in your palm. You honestly weren’t even hungry at the moment, Raph’s words annoyingly repeating itself like a broken record in your mind. He would never let you go on your own mission in a million, he had said, you weren’t ready. You put the plate of food on your bedside table, afraid you might somehow break it out of anger if you held it any longer. Today, you would prove your brothers wrong, you decided. You would go on your own solo mission and come back, unscathed. ‘But what would the mission even be?’ you thought, looking around your room and hoping to gain some kind of idea as to what you could do.

Your eyes landed on a framed photo on your desk, your whole family, including you, smiling at the camera happily. That picture was taken before New York was filled with dangerous mutants. Before your brother’s forbid you to go outside of the lair alone. Your eyes landed on your father, suddenly gaining an idea as to what you could do on your solo mission. You bolted out of your room, running through the kitchen and ignoring all the confused glances from your brothers as you sprinted to your dad’s room.

“Dad!” You suddenly yelled, starting him and almost making him drop his snack. “Green! You almost made me drop my hot soup!” “Sorry, dad.” You apologized quietly, glancing back at the door connecting the room to the kitchen and making sure your brothers couldn’t hear you. You scratched the back of your neck. “I was wondering if you needed me to run any errands for you on the surface.” “Errands?” Your father suspiciously questioned, and you prayed he wouldn’t be as protective as your brothers. “Yeah! Like, do you need me to pick up any snacks or food for the kitchen.” Splinter hummed, scratching his chin. “Well, I could go for some cake right now. And I’m on my last slice at the moment.” “I can get you a fresh one from the bakery! I-It’s not far from here.” “Hm. I suppose it would be nice. Thank you, Green.” “Your welcome, dad!” You hastily yelled, speeding out of the living room and the kitchen.

Your excitement from finally leaving the lair to complete your first solo mission was through the roof. Before you knew it, you had already pushed off the manhole that led into your home, with a bit of struggle. Once you made it outside, you put it back into place, running to the streets. You had dressed for the occasion, of course. You wore a baggy hoodie and some baggy pants that hid you hoped hid you well enough.

Your pace slowed as you stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, looking around at your surroundings in amazement. It was all the same as when you would go out with your brothers. The same bright lights. The same small amount of people still walking around at such a late time. The same cars that rode through mostly empty streets. But at the same time, it felt so different. It all came with an overwhelming sense of exhilaration and freedom, like you could do whatever you wanted. With that, you happily skipped through the sidewalk, ready to get your dad some fresh cake from the bakery and complete your first ever solo mission.

God, you were going to love rubbing this in your brother's faces.

[kakiastro]

Astrology Placements Observations

This is just from my own personal research after studying lots of chart. So don’t come for me

Mars Virgo people are the true freaks. Virgo rules over acts of service, these are the people that’s going to know every little thing about your body and how to please you!

Aquarius moons are either social butterflies or very introverted

Mercury 3h or 6h knows what the are talking about okay! Mercury is at home when it’s in these houses.

Pisces Venus/Venus 12h people are prone to attracting narcissistic people in love. These people want to see the good and idolize what their partner could be. You all need to start seeing people for who they are at moment. Stop looking at them red flags like carnivals flags and start seeing them as stop signs.

Libra rising has been through some things in their love life. your love life has been a battlefield due to having Aries 7h. The day y’all start learning the word NO and setting boundaries with people then it’ll get better

Taurus Mercury people love to cuss and cuss a lot. You guys are really good at it too! Tell me I’m not the only ones to notice this?😅

Mars 1h people may have been in lots of fights growing up. You may be prone to having lots of accidents as well, be careful around knives.

Saturn 9h may be skeptics when it comes to religion or spiritual topics. You guys need to see some proof before it happens. On the flip side, you can be religious and firm in your traditional beliefs.

Jupiter 4h can indicate someone moving around a lot to different city or countries. You guys have to have new experiences in your lives

Aries 10h can excel in any chosen career that they choose to be in. The key to success is having the passion to want to do it

Venus-Saturn aspect- people have a timeless classic look about them. They may dress from a different era.

Saturn 7h doesn’t always mean you’re going to marry late in life. It could mean that your partner is older than you, or you can be older than them. They could be mature, they could own a business, your partner could be a past life connection and it coming back this lifetime to fulfill that duty. The same can be said with the Venus-Saturn aspect

Pluto-Venus aspect goes through the biggest spiritual growth through love. They’ve been through some painful experiences in love but out of that came lots of growth.

Venus-Uranus aspect has a very unique fashion aesthetic

Mercury-Uranus aspect has a restless mind, you guys have a million things you want to do and say. You guys may talk fast too.

Scorpio are only “obsessed” with their partners or anyone is when then they genuinely love you to the core. Other than that, I promise scorpios don’t be thinking about y’all like that😅

Mars Cancers people anger scares me more than Mars Aries folks😭don’t ever get on these people bad side.

Saturn 10h peeps, you guys will get the public recognition and respect you deserve the older you get so hang in there

Chiron 1h don’t be so hard on your physical bodies, you guys are beautiful okay!

[consistencynevermether]

Astarion x Rouge! Tav

A/N: I am, as the professionals would say, back on my bullshit. anyways here's another in my series of Astarion x a certain class 

part 1 (Paladin Tav version)- https://www.tumblr.com/consistencynevermether/730256251991310336/astarion-x-gn-paladin-reader-hcs-an-this-man?source=share

Bastard x bastard 

You two are absolute little SHITS together let me tell y’all that 

Your love language? CRIME. 

No but seriously imagine this- one of you had this plain steel ring, nothing special or anything just collecting dust at the bottom of your bags. Honestly, you don’t even remember which one of you it originally belonged to

When you first met, one of you had stolen the ring from the other to prove they were “superior with their hands” to the other. Eventually, it became a game between the two of you, every few days stealing this little trinket from each other. And bragging until the other stole it back. It didn’t matter whether either of you wore it on your fingers, around your necks, or even hiding it in folds of clothing. Neither could hold onto it for more than a week before the other snatched it up 

The most memorable little moment with this ring- once you had both gone on a late night walk, hand in hand. The moon's soft glow bathing you both in silver, it was like a scene out of a romance novel, especially when you leaned in to press your lips against his

And then- 

While he was distracted you slipped it off his finger and booked it. Immediately running as fast as you could, not daring to look back, laughing as you sped off with your prize

Unfortunately for you, Astarion happens to be a vampire spawn. Vampire spawn are quite physically inclined, and Astarion is pretty fit

What I’m saying is you made it a good 30 feet before getting tackled to the ground and had the ring wrestled out of your hand 

Honestly, though, you were laughing so hard you didn’t even mind losing the game, you were just happy that for a second your master plan had worked. 

Astarion complained about how his outfit got all dusty because of you, but you had heard him laughing right along with you when he had tackled you to the ground

Astarion won’t admit this, but that ring means more to him than any bejeweled precious jewelry ever could, because it connects him to you

Both of you claim to have the best set of knives and take every opportunity to show off to each other with your skills. Once you actually picked a lock with a smaller blade and you could swear it caused Astarion to be a little flustered. 

Sharing clothes? Sharing clothes. Listen, I'm just saying, will you let your vampire boyfriend burn up in the sun or will you lend him that nice new cloak you just got? Yea, that’s what I thought now it’s joint property. Dw tho it all evens out when you steal one of his nightshirts (it’s the comfiest thing ever, and not just because it always faintly smells like him) 

You guys definitely do couples' heists together. Sneaking, pickpocketing, lockpicking, running from the law, it's all in a day's work for the most shifty couple in Faerun. One of you might distract a lord while the other snuck into his vault to retrieve some valuable magical item. 

Ok but in all seriousness, y’all must be the most ethereal couple around. Imagine seeing two people glide over the rooftops of Baldur's gate, each jump almost like steps to a dance they both know by heart. Flitting around each other like ribbons in the breeze, one with soft silver hair and the other face obscured by their pitch-black cloak, hood pulled up and rippling in the night air. They dance across rooftops, swift as shadows, graceful as spirits, never touching, and yet somehow the rare onlooker knows they are meant to be a pair.

Some bard has definitely written a song about that last bullet point I promise you. 

You two probably had a million cons just waiting to be used. I imagine during your time together trying to get rid of the tadpole, you would both talk late into the night, bouncing ideas off each other, throwing out ideas of different tricks you could pull on the unsuspecting. Some genuinely clever, most just absurd attempts at making the other person laugh.  

If you ever actually got the chance to you it though? Oh ho HO. let me tell you how this went down. Your party had gotten into a situation, attempting to be as inconspicuous as possible. But by a bout of bad luck, someone had started harassing Karlach and at the same time, Lazel had started yelling at a guard, hand on her sword, inches away from striking. The party needed some sort of distraction, and luckily you both had just the thing. 

Astarion had grabbed the nearest glass of wine and splashed it on you, then putting on his best offended face he anguished, “How could you cheat on me?!?! And with my own BROTHER!?!?” That sentence made everyone's head snap up, including the guards as you both laid the theatrics on thick. You kept this act up with Astarion for a good 10 minutes, with fake tears and dramatics from both of you. At one point on the spot, you made up that he had slept with your mother and it was revenge, and the crowd was extremely invested, people taking sides, guards trying to calm down the chaos. But hey you're fake out worked, Karlach and Lazel were able to sneak away quietly and you had both given the distraction of a lifetime. Shadowheart disapproves.

Occasionally the two of you will talk in Thieves cant to each other when you don’t want the party to overhear certain conversations. Originally you were both probably talking about important things like strategies and debating about how to go about getting rid of the tadpole. But now you kind of both just use it to piss off Lazel a little. 

Ultimately you two really understand each other on a deep level, you really are 2 people with one mind. And together there's a world of adventure out there for you both, and infinite fun magical items for you both too “acquire��.