#I’m so tired of being alone
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I’m actually having such a meltdown
#I’m so unlovable#and it’s my own fault but it’s still so fucking hard and unfair#I’m unlovable and unwantable and alone#I’m so tired of being alone#I’m tired of being the butt of every joke or the one who gets asked out for laughs#people used to compare dating me to corporal punishment#I hate myself
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I’m feeling very lonely and hopeless today.
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i want to be loved so badly
#i feel like all i am is just a toy that people only want to play with then toss away whenever they feel like it#all i want is a partner#i’m so tired of being alone#i don’t want to be alone anymore#yet each passing day nothing changes#i always feel like i’m waiting for something that never happens#i’m really fucking sick of this like what am i doing wrong?!?
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fatigue and isolation killing me
#I’m so hungry and can’t eat#i slept all day but I’m too exhausted to get out of bed#I just want to be held#I’m so tired of being alone#in my room everyday
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#really wishing I had someone to love right now#I’m so tired of being alone#I just want to cuddle and drink hot chocolate and watch Christmas movies#I want someone to love and know me so well I don’t have to make a list with links of exactly what I want because they already KNOW#I want someone to put in the same effort I do so I can be loved the way I love#and as I say this my dad sits next to me on the couch#he knows I’m lonely and he doesn’t want me to be#I love him so much#and my sisters just said they’re both a size 4 in jeans#and Cassie was like ‘I didn’t think we were the same size’ and Becca goes ‘I went up a size’ like jfc I should kms#*zipps jacket* no one look at me
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i see people with friends and partners and living life and i wish i could that
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And if I question you I’m the bad guy….
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😞
#personal fuity shit#i just did it again. i made someone sad with something I said#I’m so tired of being alone#i really can’t tell people anything#i know I’m a bad person for venting#i really should’ve learned to keep it all go myself#why do I still seek connection#why do I still try to share my burdens#god I just want to die. please let me die. please kill me#206 days. i really can’t wait#i already have an idea of how it’s gonna go#but I’ll do some more research into it#i just want it to end.
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y’all will never see me as an actual bbw model or making scenario/stuffing content of any sort because i am a TERRIBLE actor.
no i cant do a cute little moan and rub my belly after a funnel session, im literally about to pass out and need to be tucked into bed
#idk. it’s so hard for me to even do eating videos bc#i either focus completely on food and zone out#or i’m so preoccupied w filming/whatever else that no eating gets done#plus. i can’t lie y’all#i have 0 appetite rn#i go to bed hungry bc eating sounds tiring 😭 i need to live alone again so bad#i miss weekly trader joe’s trips#and being able to cook what i want without comment#manifesting a job near the river. amen#talk
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thinking about how chilchuck’s wife disappeared one day without him ever knowing why. he came home from work in the dungeon and the woman he loves was gone.
Of course, after learning that she was safe he did the most Chilchuck thing ever, avoiding seeing her for the next 4 years because it’s easier to avoid the woman he loves all together than to learn what he did that hurt and drove her away.
Obviously, having her husband never come find her only cemented her doubts about Chil: he doesn’t love her anymore, because if he loved her he would find her and try to make things work.
Little did she know Chil would spend the next 4 years faithful.
#thinking about chilchuck spending 4 years alone in the home he used to share with his wife/childhood friend makes me UGH#and all that time he’s wondering what he did wrong/what he could have done differently#they’re so angsty i love it so much#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#chilchuck#sorry for being cringe i’m tired and chuck brained
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stay clean, ya filthy animals 🫧
#when is someone gonna fall in love with me#i’m so tired of being this hot and alone#it’s taxing#me#gwlg#girls with tattoos#bi girls#fat girls#chubby#chubby girls#gay girls#curvy girls#bisexual
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I just learned why Shad hates Irene in canon and knowing what I do now about everyone’s favorite the Matron, I can say with my whole heart,
What the hell, Irene
#I keep coming across audios of Hyria telling Irene’s story too#and I can see why the people of Ru’aun love Irene! I see the saint they do in the stories#but I can also see that by the time she got around to Shad she wasn’t that person anymore#she was alone because of her power until she came across Shad and I can see how that might develop into clinging onto him with such an#intensity that she sends him to other realms to foster whatever their relationship is and falling in love with him#Shad is the only person Irene has ever known that’s on the same level as her so it makes sense she wants#him as a lover as something more intimate than what they are#but Shad was tired of being feared and hated and so he falls for the one person who acts very positively towards him#all Shad wanted was to be loved. to have a family.#and he got it! he had the love of his life and a beautiful baby girl and even a close group of friends in the Divine Warriors#and when they need the relics to protect the realm he understands that they’re made with human souls and he accepts that#for the sake of the greater good#only for Irene to use their daughter to make HIS relic and not tell him he’s using the weaponized version of their daughter’s soul#he’s obviously furious when he finds out. he confronts Irene heartbroken that she would do such a thing. Why their daughter?#and then she turns the rest of the Divine Warriors (who all worship her) against him#No wonder Shad wants revenge! No wonder he’s after every last fragment of his relic he can get his hands on#that’s all that’s left of his baby#Or maybe I’m thinking way too hard about a block roleplay#mcd irene#mcd shad#divine warriors#dropofsunlightextras#mcd rewrite#mcd#aphmau minecraft diaries#minecraft diaries#aphblr
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I am very tired of everything..of this so called life that only s problem after problem..exhausted mentally and emotionally..my mind and my heart no longer give more..and yet deep down I keep screaming for help but as I do not express it with my mouth nobody hears them…..
#tw depressing thoughts#sorry for being depressing#depressing shit#depressiv#soledad#depressing life#tw depressing stuff#mente suicidia#lonely girl#kinda depressing#i’m so exhausted#mentally exhausted#emotionally exhausted#sad thoughts#sentimientos#tw sui ideation#suic1de#depresion#depresión#mentally tired#alone with my thoughts#chica depresiva
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THE EX-MORNING SERIES CONCEPT
By now I think many people have heard that KristSingto’s upcoming series is an original script that was written for them. What we also have confirmed is that it was written about them.
[source]
KRIST: This series was written by P'Backaof and directed by P'Lit where they created this script from the start deliberately for the two of us and they got information for the characters etc. from KristSingto directly. In the series, the name for P'Sing is Tamtawan, and my name is Phatapi. And Tamtawan Tamtawan and Phatapi are KristSingto themselves.
INTERVIEWER: Does that mean you play yourself?
KRIST: [laughing] Yes, we act as ourselves, so it's not difficult at all.
Today, Aof elaborated on his part on Twitter:
[source: @backaof]
[translation: @_beinglistener]
And Jojo added:
[source: @jojotichakorn]
[translation: @_beinglistener]
So, two gay men are the leading creative minds behind KristSingto’s comeback series. Time to study up on your KristSingto history, kids. \:D/
Long live sanctioned RPF. 🎉
#krist perawat#singto prachaya#kristsingto#the ex morning#i’ve already seen the same tired ‘guess rent was due’ about krist and#i see on twitter when people link my thread about krist to people still insisting he’s homophobic#man’s rich#he works constantly#he even said it’s something he regrets now that his grandmother who raised him passed away#he worked so much he didn’t have as much time for his family—who he helps support#he is quite literally considered bl royalty#he has more queer people in his circle than straight#waa (gay) is his mentor#aof (gay) wrote this series and jojo (gay) thought up the concept so even professionally he's supported by queer people#you don’t have to like him#and you don’t have to admit to sending death threats to a stranger who doesn’t speak your language based on rumors you didn’t verify#just y’know#admit quietly to yourself alone in your head that you were wrong and you caused harm to a person who didn’t deserve it#plenty of actors use bl as a stepping stone to bigger jobs#he’s not one of them#he wanted to do bl for years but gmmtv told him he could only work with singto#so literally the only reason kit didn’t do bl until BMF was scheduling issues because singto wanted to study abroad#and singto couldn’t get a fixed date for it and then the pandemic messed with his plans even more#i’m glad to see more and more people are understanding who krist is recently#and even in the series they made pathapi’s controversy an impulsive act of anger#krist has said he used to struggle with being hotheaded#and one of his apologies for the igs was even something like ‘i acted without thinking of how it would look out of context’#he just wanted people to stop harassing him for his sexuality but the context isn’t in the igs#anyway my go-to when i’m too tired to talk about this is always this#if he had ever been homophobic thai people would be the ones leading the charge against him…but it’s interfans
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Dear Diary,
I’m just not worth the effort I guess.
#dear diary#heart vs mind#weight of the world#sick of being sick#overwhelmed#invisible#i’m tired of trying so hard#what’s the point#it is what it is#depression#struggling#alone#intrusive thoughts#idk anymore#one step forward ten steps back
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Every time I make a Pro-Palestine post, I get sent death threats and hate mail by alt-right Zionists. As does anyone brave enough to speak out on the genocide that’s currently unfolding. Yet y’all want me to have sympathy for Taylor Swift because she would be risking her “safety” if she spoke out on “political” matters??? Y’all are so out of touch with reality it’s sickening.
Take a minute out of your insular lives to check out the college students risking their education and their safety to protest genocide. Or the long list of celebrities such as SZA, Hozier and The Weeknd who have shown solidarity with the Palestinian cause. Or the millions of people all across the world who show solidarity through protesting, donating or posting.
Please, stop telling me you’re worried for a billionaire’s safety. Specifically a billionaire who used to speak out on issues because she wanted to be “on the right side of history” but abandoned that rhetoric once she rose to the top of the charts again.
#im so sick of this discourse leave me alone#I don’t care about your weird af parasocial relationship that has blinded you into following and worshipping celebrities#you’re being exploited and don’t even know it wake up bitches#I’m tired and I’m deleting all of the hate mail#taylor swift#taylorswift#the tortured poets department#ttpd#free palestine#the eras tour#free gaza#miss americana#lover#colombia university#college protests#ucla#student protests#sza#hozier#the weeknd
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