#I’m so proud of it I love making Google documents

[wooshofficial]

Heyyyy blesties. I know we’re all kinda mad about the site lookin like it does. And so some people made some skins for the site that make it look cool. But they’re scattered throughout fanwork channels across the league and hard to collect. So I made a masterdoc of all the ones I could find, with links to each, and credits to who made them, and what programs are needed to make them work.

[warlocksoup]

into the spider-verse: nishinoya yuu

volume one, chapter one: emails

word count: 2.1k

masterlist | main masterlist | taglist

I know about him.

Teeth gnawing on the inside of her cheek, she stares down at her laptop screen. At the same email she’s been staring at for the last three days, ever since she first got the notification for it on her subway ride home. From ijs99ETJfdhsg@yahoo.com: I know about him. To anyone else, it might not bear the same weight. To her, it’s suffocating.

She’s done everything she can to try and trace it. Everything she can, of course, being Googling the address and enlisting the help of Yachi from the IT department at the Bugle. The outcome of the former being: Your search - ijs99ETJfdhsg@yahoo.com- did not match any documents, and the outcome of the latter being Yachi’s entire laptop getting infected with malware.

So, not great.

She shifts on the stiff stuffing of her couch, legs crossed under her and the heat from the bottom of her laptop on the bare skin of her thighs. I know about him. She hopes it’s a bluff. Realistically, she knows it’s not. But she’s still in the denial stage.

The screen goes dark, and she wiggles her mousepad to brighten it up once more, just so she can stare longer. She can’t tell him. Not yet. Ideally, not ever. But definitely not yet.

“What are you doing?”

She jolts, automatically slamming her laptop shut as she does so and jumping to face the source of the intrusion.

Spider-Man’s in her living room.

Which is fair. It’s his living room too, even if she does pay the lion’s share of the rent.

“Porn,” is her immediate response and the only thing she can think of to justify her reaction, even if it makes her cheeks burn. “Watching porn,” she doubles down, because she has to.

He reaches behind his head and grabs the end of his mask that sits at the back of his neck, pulling it off in one swift movement. Nishinoya looks at her with his hair flattened against his forehead, blond streak brushing against his brow, and a blossoming, deep purple purse spread across his cheek. “In the living room? Well, I guess I am home early, so can’t complain there.”

She pushes her the laptop off to the couch, and stalks towards him, eyes now fixed on the bruise that stains his features. “And what the fuck happened to you?”

Noya grins at her, bright and unfazed. Almost proud, like his injuries are a badge of honor. “Just ran into my good friend Alexei Sytsevich. He was super stoked to see me.”

Her hand shoots out and takes hold of his jaw, lightly squishing the soft flesh of his cheek together as she tilts his head to the side, trying to get a better look at the damage. Noya just stands there and lets her. “Thought that guy was in jail.”

“Broke out,” Noya says, words barely making it out between his smooshed-up lips. She releases him, and steps back. “He loves breaking out of jail. It’s like his favorite thing to do.”

Noya steps back, and retreats into his bedroom, closing the door with his foot as he does so. Still, she can hear his voice coming through their thin, plaster walls. “I don’t even know what that guy’s end game is anymore. I’m pretty sure he just wants me dead. It’s always like, ‘this is your end, Spider!’ when before he was a lot more focused on his personal goals, so.” 

She sighs and collapses back onto the couch again. Freak emails from freak strangers with untraceable email addresses and Sytsevich breaking out of jail for the thousandth-fucking-time to wreck his havoc on Noya’s face. Her hair is going to start turning gray. “You’d think they would’ve built a cell to hold him, by now,” she calls, and Noya is swinging open his bedroom door to saunter back out into living room, suit abandoned in favor of old gym shorts and a vintage looking Godilla t-shirt. “What do you think costs more taxpayer dollars, building a better cell, or paying all those cops to get him back in again?”

Noya rolls his eyes. “Well, I’m the one they call, and they don’t pay me, so.”

That she knows all too well. It’s hard, being a single-income home. Since Noya’s full time job is both incredibly demanding and also unpaid, rent and utilities and groceries mostly fall on her shoulders. Which, it’s not like she can complain or hold it against him. In exchange, he’s the one and only Spider-Man, and she could do worse for roommates.

And he helps when he can, selling candid photos of Spider-Man to the Bugle so they can use them to accompany their hit pieces on him (Noya, of course, finds it incredibly ironic every time they write out a check to him, gleefully paying him for photos of himself).

Noya flicks on the kitchen light, and as he’s lingering in the kitchen, popping open the fridge door with his hip to stare blankly at its contents, she grabs at her laptop once more, opening it back up so she can stare at the email once more. “Do you wanna get a pizza tonight? Some guy gave me a twenty for saving his car from the Rhino’s path.”

“Twenty?” she echoes back, fingers hovering over the reply button. Should she reply? What would she even say? Her Internet safety training at work taught her to never reply to spam emails, just to report it to the system administrator. But looping in the Bugle on an email like this is the last thing she wants. “Seems kinda cheap for saving his entire car.”

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” Noya calls back, closing the fridge. He flicks his wrist in the direction of the living room, and string of white web following it. It attaches itself to the side of a crinkled up, plastic water bottle she was drinking, and before she can blink, the water bottle finds itself in Noya’s hand.

“Dick,” she says, without looking up from her computer. “I was drinking that.”

“Can you look at your porn later? Do you want the pizza or not?”

🕸 ｡𖦹°‧✩｡🕷˚⋆｡

Between them is a half-eaten box of pepperoni pizza, propped open on the fire escape. Noya chews loudly on a slice, his eyes on the city skyline, and hers on him. She watches the bruise on his cheek, and how it moves and shifts with each bite he takes. She reaches out and grazes her thumb against it. He swats her hand away. “Stop it, stop worrying.”

She frowns and slides her hand between her pressed-together knees, like she’s trying to hold it still. “Who the fuck said I’m worried?”

“You’re always worried,” he replies, dusting off the end of his pizza nad leaning up against the closed window behind him. “Every time I come home with so much as a papercut, you’re staring at me like there’s a bullet hole in my chest.”

Her eyes drops, and she looks at the greased-stained cardboard between them. “Well, you have come home with bullet holes before, so.”

He sleeps them off. He wraps up the wound in that fucking webbing of his and he just sleeps it off like it’s a headache or scratch or something most people wouldn’t even go to the doctor for. And then she’ll find dried, rusted bits of that webbing, littered around the house.

“Yeah, and I turned out fine,” he assures her, voice a bit softer now. She looks at him, brown eyes shining and slight grin unwavering. “A bruise isn’t gonna kill me. I don’t want you to waste your energy freaking out over me. You have better things to be freaking out over. I know how horrible your boss is.”

She scoffs, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, but I don’t really give a shit about him, to be honest.”

Her fingers fidget, and Noya reaches over, covering both of her hands with his. She looks up at him. “I’ll always take care of us both. Okay? Nothing can happen to me while I’m out there, because I know I gotta come back home and make sure you’re good. That’s my number one priority, and I’m not gonna break that promise. Alright?”

She nods her head. “Yeah, alright. I trust you.”

His grin brightens, and he leans forward to throw his arm over her shoulder, pulling her into his side. “See, that’s my girl. Complete and total faith in me. I love to see it.”

“Whatever,” she grumbles, but rests her head against his shoulder. It feels nice, in his arms. “I’m really the one who takes care of you, y’know. By like, paying the bills.”

“Oh, that reminds me. Can I borrow ten bucks? I bet Tanaka-“

He stops and straightens out. She peers up at him, at watches as his focus narrows in on something in the distance. By the time she catches up, and she can hear the sirens start to go off in the distance, Nishinoya is gone, leaving a slight breeze against the strands of her hair.

🕸 ｡𖦹°‧✩｡🕷˚⋆｡

On her desk are two rejections.

The first is on Spider-Man, a feature piece that details his symbolic value to the people of New York; how valuable his presence in the community is and just what he represents to the average New Yorker. It theorizes that identity of Spider-Man isn’t what matters, but the meaning of the mask itself. And it has a big, yellow sticky note on it with the word ‘WRONG!’ written out angrily in thick, black marker.

She sighs. She knew that one wasn’t gonna make it past Jameson. Hardly any of her Spider-Man pieces do. Noya told her to just start writing smear pieces on him, just to get more articles published. But she’s not willing to sacrifice her journalistic integrity to write a bunch of bullshit about how her best friend is ‘getting in the way of the NYPD.’

The second is on the recently passed Norman Osborn. Most obituaries have been fluffy love letters to the capitalist, and maybe Jameson was expecting more of that, rather than a scathing dissection of his life, including, but not limited to, his involvement in developing and selling weapons of war. The sticky note on this one reads, ‘what is this commie crap?’ which, in all honesty, she should’ve been expecting.

She sighs and falls back into her chair. She needs a new, better job. At a place that will publish her articles without twisting her words into nonsense propaganda. A place that will pay her properly, and not like it’s nineteen-eighty-five.

There’s only one silver lining to her job, and that’s the blonde-haired girl depositing a hot latte and everything bagel on her desk. “Rejected again?” Yachi asks, pulling up a chair from the empty desk beside her.

“Ugh, apparently billionaire, tax-evading war criminal Norman Osborn was a friend to the masses that needs to be celebrated, and the guy that says innocent lives every day for free is public enemy number one,” she rants at once, snatching that coffee up and immediately gulping it down, ignoring how it burns her tongue on the way down.

“Yeah,” Yachi agrees. “You didn’t know that?”

She rolls her eyes, wiggling her mouse to wake up her computer. “Shut up.”

Yachi leans back in her chair, and gestures towards the computer screen. “Any more emails from that anonymous guy?”

“No, and thank god for that.”

“It’s so weird,” Yachi notes. “’I know about him,’ is weird, but they’re not threatening you for like, money or information or like any other average email scam. And from what I could see that guy really did not want to be tracked down, and spent a lot of time making sure you couldn’t. And for what? To say something weird.”

Yachi doesn’t know the weight of it. Doesn’t even begin to understand the threat, the implication. Yachi doesn’t even know how the ‘him’ is supposed to be. So she really doesn’t get how disconcerting those facts are. She contemplates, for a moment, slamming her head into the keyboard in front of her.

“Whatever,” she decides ultimately. “I’m just going to ignore it and hopefully absolutely nothing will come of it. It’s how I deal with most of my problems.”

“Oh, what a coincidence, me too,” Yachi laughs, and then stands. “I gotta go. Jameson accidentally downloaded malware onto his computer trying to claim a Target gift card. Have fun rewriting your articles.”

“See you for lunch?” she calls after Yachi’s retreating form.

“Yep!” Yachi confirms with a wave of her hand, disappearing down the line of small, cramped cubicles.

With one, deep, calming breath, she returns her attention to the desktop in front of her. She stretches her neck to the left, and then to the right, and prepares for another day of endless bullshit.

Ding!

YOU HAVE ONE NEW MESSAGE.

taglist: @wyrcan @causenessus @seroh @19calicos @w4nyoung @soulfullystarry @chocolains @jaynawayna @baylz @vuntysharck @mollyrolls @boooolame @staileykout @angee444 @kameyyy @choerry-picking @giocriedpower @sunakeiji @sleepzyy @lunasfics @thecoolestlia @yoshit-he-dinosaur @bectoshi @thatonecroc @karasyuu @iatethemochi @itsdragonius @syverse @savemebrazilhinata @localgaytrainwreck @snail-squasher @atzixo @ahdbodhr @nbcvs @dailyakira @kasumiixs @s1ckntw1st3d @noble-17 @atsumuenthusiast @jino0ix @boobilater @keeboismine @scxrcherr @acowboykisser @impatienscush @loverlunaire @oneiratxxia10 @kattiscrying @dazqa @termite-joe @quikhs @cupidsblonde @izukuwus @greninjafan5000 @mplesyrup

[swiftie-sherlockian]

So…

Idk who knows this already but I watched The Sign of Three for the first time this past Valentine’s Day and almost immediately when it was over I wrote a Johnlock duet with a free online instrumental on YouTube and afterwards I was EXTREMELY proud of it. It’s sort of an AU where John notices Sherlock leaving at the end and follows him back to 221B to find him an absolute wreck in his bedroom, high and erratic and it’s a little hurt/comfort-y. Think Forever Winter by Taylor Swift but make it Johnlock

Anyway…. I Google Translated the lyrics too many times and now I have this silly song that still has feels (some of the lines are still very similar and once you read this you will know what lines those are once you read this) and other lines are “huh?” also try to figure out which lyrics I wrote from Sherlock’s POV and which ones are John’s. They may be obvious at first but the end sort of switches often

anyway… lyrics below the cut

He took it too

There was no doubt in those beautiful eyes

Return to the starting position 

Don’t tell me it’s easy

Nothing has changed

I’ll always be with you

Not everything will change

I won’t be together

I have no voice

Now they’ll talk and I’ll be silent

Lost in silence

Whatever really exists will be “good”

Oh, like now

I think I’ll clap once or twice 

Walk through the church doors

The party is over

Even if you ask him, he looks like a deer at night

Don’t give up

The bedroom door was closed

I have a pack of cigarettes 

A night’s sleep is very important for relaxation 

Long and full

Be stupid if you want

I play music and die

A new song is playing in my head

~~~

I said it doesn’t matter

I lied

My mind can’t read

Are you asking me if I’m not perfect?

I’m an idiot, so beautiful 

Everyone who knows me knows that

The documentation is good

What a wedding night

I am and will remain your godfather 

If they call me, I’ll run

I’m leaving

I’m going to sleep

Don’t ask why

I’ll ask you to stop

But take a pencil with you if necessary 

We’re writing a tragedy

~~~

I’ve lost my mind again

Call this guy tonight

Something has to happen again

It’s uncomfortable 

Soon everything will change

Even though I’m used to being apart, I still feel strange

Everything will change

I think I’ll catch you

I can’t stop

Leave it at the altar

But then the rot will quickly dry up

But now that I’ve found you, I was wrong

Oh, how are you now?

Third sign of bleeding, I feel full

I saw you coming out the door

The party ended abruptly 

I won’t be quiet when I go back to your apartment 

Stay inside

I have an unlock key

Those cigarettes have been missing from your home for two years

Long and full 

Some are right

I wrote that waltz when I was married

I’m sorry I didn’t say anything 

~~~

You could say that you’re OK

I know when you’re lying

I can’t read your mind

Nobody is good enough

“Maybe he’s an idiot” he half-smiled

I know, I mean, I know

The documentation is very good 

I saw you walking at night

You don’t want to be my best man, you want to be my husband

I want to study in my old cabin

I followed you to the door

I’m not crying anymore

I know why

Don’t tell me to stop 

Can you give me my pencil?

This way I can fix this mistake

~~~

All the steps we’ve taken so far

I don’t want to break us up

I did what I had to do

I don’t want to leave you

I offended someone in this mess

Who would regret it?

That’s why you’re guilty

Three words and we’re done 

But I know it won’t be easy for this kid

I want to go back 

Close again

I laughed and held my nose

Why should I live?

Who’s stopping me from taking a closer look?

I’ll fix it one way or another

Even if I didn’t have a thousand secrets, I wouldn’t tell them

But I haven’t been there for a long time

All the pain, all the love

Take a pencil and draw

There’s no room for doubt 

Invisible folder

Candle

All my memories

Don’t let these two years get too cold

I have a network in my head

Every good though brings suffering

Most importantly, hold your breath

Until the music stops

Damn it’s over

This is not yet complete

@a-victorian-girl @nowiamcoveredinyou @gingaaaaa @whatnext2020 @jamielovesjam

[freneticfloetry]

#4 & #34 for the writer asks. Please

4. What piece of writing are you most proud of?

God, I must sound like a broken record, but I’m totally going to say to build a home once again. I’d gotten so badly burned by the ship I’d been writing since 2019 that it literally blocked me from writing anything else for a while, and feeling the urge after watching 4x04 live was a bit of a welcome revelation. It started much smaller, as most of my longer fics do — just the idea for a single post-episode scene. And what it became was the perfect blend of exactly the story I set out to tell — the fic that lives in our heads when bunnies are born, that we then have to wrestle onto a page — and something that took me entirely by surprise at times. It’s my favorite thing that I’ve ever written, partly because I’m proud of the actual words I put out, mostly because it’s my love letter to Carlos, and I’m immensely proud of myself for both starting it and seeing it through.

34. What's the weirdest thing you researched for a fic?

What’s sad is that there’s probably more than one answer to this question. I’m almost positive I looked up the exact day of the week for every May 2nd — thirteen in total — that appears in Shells of a Long-Ago Lifetime. And to All a Goodnight involved finding the most popular toys for tween holiday gifts in the year 2002, and the answer (the very first Xbox) spawned the longest, most ridiculous scene in the fic. There’s the random mentions of booze — I spent way too long searching for the perfect obscure wine to reference in one fucking line of scenes from an unfinished story, and for The Once and Future I got to Google how to make moonshine from scratch (also a single line appearance). For By Any Other, I went down a brief but deep medical research rabbit hole, trying to accurately document the timing and effects of tetrodotoxin poisoning via ingesting improperly-prepared fugu sashimi. But the winner is probably unpublished, actually — I have thousands of words of an unfinished Sherlock fic for which I researched where in the greater UK one might find a meat grinder large enough to fit a full-grown man. I’m almost positive those last two put me on a list somewhere.

Back at you, Lim. Both questions.

[scumbag-monthly]

The Young Ones Were: A Final Word from Scumbag Monthly’s Editor 🖕💚

I was going to post this on 7th March – the birthday of the pan global phenomenon himself – but I think the emotion will be stronger tonight. Either way, I’ve chosen this post to say my last farewells to Scumbag Monthly and thank the people who helped make it what it was.

It was my decision as editor to end SM at Issue #25 and it was a difficult one to make. Although SM has come with both pros and cons, it’s something I’ve enjoyed creating and is something I’m very proud of. In a way, it would have been easier to carry on – sticking with the familiar is always easier – but I didn’t want our fanzine to drift off into nothingness. I thought twenty-five was a good number to end it at. Three years; twenty-five issues; three Rik specials; a zine for the fortieth anniversary – I think we’ve done alright, all things considered. More than alright! I’m so happy that we were able to add to the fandom in some small way.

I have a head for dates, so I can tell you with 99% certainty that I took on the reins of editorship at SM on 14th May 2020. It’s weird that that time feels both close and far away – international pandemics will do that to you. I’ve seen engagement and interest in this zine ebb and flow over the years. We’ve never really received enough submissions to keep us afloat long term. I used to ask my mutuals if I could add old art of theirs to zines to keep the Drawing Room full, and the amount of my fic that made its way into SM was not the result of an overinflated ego (I promise!), more the result of fic submissions falling even lower than art submissions. We’re a small fandom; that’s always been a problem for SM. While I’ve continually emphasised the importance of submissions to SM – how else would SM involve those not working behind the scenes? – the truth is that the end products simply wouldn’t have arrived on our website be it not for the so-called scumbag staff who dedicated their free time to making pages and content.

With a small fandom and ergo a small team, SM’s ambitions had to be realistic. We would all have loved to bring new segments out in every issue but, with a lot to do and limited time to get it done each time, this often wasn’t possible. I never wanted SM to become a burden to the people who made pages for it, as we all lead offline lives and SM was simply a passion project – we made this because we wanted to, because it was fun.

I won’t deny there have been points where SM burnt me out a tad. I think it was easy to lose sight of things during the lockdowns, or simply fall completely into one project. There are some zines where well over twenty of the pages were made by me because they had to be, and I’ve often feared that The People’s Poetry suffered because of this. I’m very pleased and grateful to point out that the page share became slightly less exaggerated after we found different people for each character, but (and I’m afraid I am going to have to be egotistical now XD) I’d be lying if I denied every zine since Issue #4 isn’t drenched in my blood, sweat, and improvised version of graphic design (not actually my passion, me being primarily a writer and all XD).

I hope this isn’t sounding too negative because SM really does mean a lot to me. I think it’s just that a mixed relationship is guaranteed with anything you give a lot of yourself to and I want to be honest here, at the end. It’s going to feel weird for me for a little while: no more new documents to set up, no more new pages to make, no more themes to discuss, no more Google Forms to collect. I will miss SM, but thanks to the internet it’ll actually still be here. We’ll be keeping the website up as an archive and the same with our Tumblr blog and Instagram (scumbag_monthly). For future runs of the Rik and Ade Fest, another blog has been set up (@rikandadefest). SM has also had a Redbubble on the down low for some time now and we’re planning on adding our designs of the lads there soon, if any of you fancy owning something with those on.

I realise this whole post comes at the risk of sounding pretentious and melodramatic… but sod it, you know? Here are the people I’d like to thank individually, on behalf of our fanzine.

@theevilesteviled -

First of all, the creator of SM: the reason you’re even reading this right now. During the period in which SM got going – that calm before the utter shitstorm of 2020 – we spoke nearly every day… though, living on different sides of the globe did limit our talk time to early mornings and late evenings. Ed is the reason SM ever launched. She did almost everything for the first few zines, often at the cost of her own sanity, and she inspired a passion for this fanzine within me.

In May 2020, when I found myself in lockdown limbo between college and university, Ed was struggling with the brunt of SM plus the new hell of online classes. When I took charge of Issue #4, I don’t think I realised the extent of what I was taking on – I certainly didn’t expect to still be editor nearly three years later! Even so, without Ed SM wouldn’t have gotten as far as Issue #4. I’ll admit when she initially proposed the idea for a The Young Ones fanzine, I didn’t assume it would ever actually happen. I agreed to take on Rick’s page, but never allowed myself to imagine we’d end up with a project that’d last three years. Surely, it was only other people who could pull off that kind of thing, right? Surely, a group of introverted young adults online weren’t really going to get anywhere with this, were we?

I’m not trying to make SM sound bigger than it is – I’m well aware how niche we are, have always been – but the point I’m trying to make is: thanks to Ed spearheading SM in the early days, I had the profound realisation that I can actually be creative and try new things and they’re not destined to fall completely flat on their faces. I think everyone involved with SM, be it through making pages or submitting their work, has experienced a version of this same realisation with the publication of each zine.

That’s thanks to Ed, so I’d like to formally express my gratitude. Thank you, ya bastard.

@xgardensinspace -

The lovely Deya! Deya has always been a big part of SM, right from the beginning. The portraits of Vyvyan, Rick, Neil, Mike, Balowski, and P that appeared regularly in our zines were drawn by them, as well as the ten portraits of our staff on our website. That’s not even mentioning the five exemplary covers they’ve whizzed up for SM!

Not only is Deya an exceptionally talented artist, they’re also an enthusiastic team player. From Issue #11 onwards, they’ve been our resident Mike. As most of us agree, Mike is the most difficult young one to characterise – Deya rose to the challenge with full commitment. Alongside taking on Mike’s Moments, for a period of time in late 2021 Deya posted as Mike to SM’s Instagram every Thursday, providing all of us with funny insights into Mike’s sense of fashion. There have also been times when my SM workload proved too much and they stepped up to write Comic Strip reviews for our Strip Tease – in fact, one of my favourite reviews is the one of Five Go Mad on Mescalin we wrote together for Issue #18.

Deya has always been passionate about SM, even when it seemed there were only a few of us who were. They’ve been incredibly supportive and understanding, often one of the first to volunteer to make art or write pieces for specials. To put it lightly, SM would be left severely lacking without their endless contributions and help and for that reason I’m incredibly thankful to them.

Last spring, I was lucky enough to finally meet Deya, when they visited the UK on holiday, and they were just as lovely in person as they are online. Thank you ever so much for your work on SM, you really are a cool person.

@drinkysketch -

I felt it only right to single out Julia here. Fandom spaces are ever changing and the individuals who’ve contributed to SM are no different. Despite this, Julia has been a constant cover artist for SM – not only did she create our first ever cover art back when SM was completely unknown, she’s since provided us with five more pieces for our covers. As the clever trousers among you will have worked out, that’s six in total. Almost a quarter of our regular zines!

There’s something instantly likeable about Julia’s art style: the shapes, the bright colours, the insistence on always giving Vyvyan one eye bigger than the other. The cover of Issue #1 especially is representative of SM – it’s the establishing shot – and I couldn’t imagine a better piece of art than the one Julia provided us with. I’d like to thank her for always being so eager to make art for us, even as the world’s gotten crazier and crazier. True scumbag style!

@codrington-road -

It was April 2020 when Haley first emailed SM with a fanfic submission and an offer to make pages for Neil. These were the early days of SM – Ed and I were just about keeping up with the zine’s Rick and Vyv content but were seriously struggling where Mike and Neil were concerned. It’s thanks to Haley that Neil is the only young one I’ve never had to make a page for… well, aside from that time we switched characters for April Fool’s in Issue #14… and she’s been a constant, reliable presence at SM since Issue #4.

There probably aren’t many people who could come up again and again with hilarious horoscopes on purpose, and I don’t know for exactly how many Wednesdays Haley manned Neil’s entries to our Instagram stories, but it was a lot. 9th June 2021 fell on a Wednesday – a little daunting for anyone. Yet, I think it’s that entry from ‘Neil’, a touching piece about missing people who are no longer here while still carrying the warmth they gave us within us, that sticks out to me the most.

Haley has always brought the exact right levels of surrealism, humour, and bloody hippie moping to Neil. She is probably secretly Nigel Planer. She’s helped keep the excitement for SM alive in me when I’ve been at my wit’s end with it and is in fact the main reason this fanzine didn’t fold after Issue #19. Honestly, she’s great. Have you read the fanfic she’s submitted? Pure brilliance. Her reviews of Rik Mayall's Bedside Tales and GLC were sublime.

Thank you, Haley, for encouraging not just me but everyone behind the scenes of SM and for being our resident Neil for so long. I know you’re a girlie, but I hope the seed of your loin is fruitful in the belly of your woman. Ta very much!

@martian-martian-martian -

Part of SM since Issue #18, Wisely is a person who truly deserves so much love. I first spoke to Wisely on Tumblr when they signed up to write about Rick and Kevin in our second Rik zine, in 2021. Needless to say, the results of their endeavours were some of the most memorable pieces in that zine. Rick still hasn’t recovered.

After that, Wisely only became more and more involved in SM, until they’d taken on the enigmatic fifth housemate, that scumbag named Petyr, as a regular in our zine. They did this despite the graphic design element being out of their comfort zone and even came up with a whole new page idea to spearhead. Cliff ‘sHits – as well as having a perfectly Young Ones-esq name – is exactly the kind of thing I always hoped would start happening with SM: that staff would strike out with new page ideas when they had the time. Wisely has a talent for twisting well known verses to fit the scumbag agenda and we thank them for it.

A keen promoter of SM – they could frequently be found suggesting submitting to our fanzine in the comments of TYO fanart on Tumblr – they’ve even written fanfic to keep zines full of content. I’d like to thank them for joining the team and enhancing the zine in the process. SM is all the better for having them.

@the-tardis-in-221b-baker-street -

Zoe already has a name for herself in Rik Mayall circles outside the scumbags; what fan wouldn’t go absolutely crazy at the sheer time and dedication she puts into her many cosplays? Zoe has a knack for morphing into the bastards she portrays… physically, at least. I’ve always found her to be as friendly as Alan B’Stard is devious. XD

It was during SM’s hiatus, when the spot of resident Vyvyan fell vacant, that Zoe immediately jumped at the chance to help SM out. Since Issue #20, she’s provided the voice of the beloved punk as well as producing a page of her own design, Top of the Plops. Zoe has also been quick to help out where reviews of Filthy, Rich and Catflap and of the music in The Young Ones are concerned, for which I am very grateful. Despite being the newest staff member at SM, she’s thrown herself fully into it and offered much needed reassurance and submissions whenever necessary. Zoe has been an optimistic voice at the fanzine: always up for new ideas and competitions, always there with schemes to boost engagement. Her DnD stats for the lads in Issue #24 were incredible.

We’ve had many scumbags writing for Vyvyan at SM over the years – more than we’ve had for any other character – and I’m thrilled we got Zoe in for our final run. She even made the cover art for our last issue. Thank you!

@aspinecone -

Aspen is someone I’ve shared online fandom spaces with since 2017. We’re both fans of Red Dwarf, but it was our shared enjoyment of The Young Ones that finally got us talking to one another. Last autumn, we finally met in person when we went to see Ade in A Christmas Carol - a brilliant day with a great friend that I'll always remember.

Aspen has had a presence behind the scenes of SM since the beginning, often submitting fanart and the odd piece of fanfic, until they took on the role of resident Balowski at SM from Issue #16 onwards. Creating content for the character most out of the loop with the others isn’t as easy as you might think, but Aspen has always produced insane, amusing pages for him. Aspen was also the original cover artist pencilled in for Issue #21, but graciously stood aside when they realised offline commitments were going to need more of their time.

During SM’s run, I’ve sometimes had hairbrained schemes such as making the badges several scumbags will be receiving very, very soon. I’m no design whiz – Ed and I always made SM out of Word Documents – and Aspen helpfully volunteered to remove the backgrounds from designs and clean them up. Like I’ve always said, producing SM has been a team effort. I’d like to thank Aspen for always being in my corner.

@cloubdustings -

Ava, the mad meme machine! If I recall correctly, Ava first popped up in scumbag circles in late 2020. She surprised SM with cover art for Issue #10 and kindly took on the role of resident Vyvyan from that same issue until Issue #19. 2021 was not a fun year – in fact, I’d argue it was worse than 2020 in some respects – so having Ava on the SM team to handle all Vyvyan content was a great help.

Ava has a very distinct sense of humour and you can usually tell which British comedian she’s most recently become obsessed with by checking her Instagram. XD Even with changing tastes, she’s still making content about Mr Mayall and her brand of whackiness is most definitely beloved by the fandom. Thank you for sharing it with SM!

@lumivarjo -

Lumi was around at the very beginning of SM and is actually responsible for the piece of grey tape bearing the zine’s name that became our logo. He was our original resident P, producing pages for us during the autumn of 2020. Lumi has always been more behind the scenes than at the forefront of SM, but has nonetheless also always been supportive. Being an artistic sod, Lumi is to thank for many of the key headers SM used, which were all vital pieces of the SM brand… if we want to get really pretentious. Thank you for being there for the zine!

@serenpop -

Pol was also around when Ed was proposing this insane new idea of a fanzine for The Young Ones and was our first resident Neil. Offline commitments saw them have to drop the role, but they reappeared again to help us out when we needed cover art at a pinch for Issue #9. A lot of SM’s Drawing Rooms have featured art from Pol, so I’d like to thank them for brightening up our pages!

Additionally, I'd like to thank the other scumbags who’ve made cover art for us: @frankenbolt (who made three(!) beautifully chaotic covers, including everybody’s favourite Modern AU); @whatacompletebastard (for the fab Breakfast Club parody that’s always been popular with the scumbags); @heinzpilsnerbloody (another talented artist who drew me a whole bunch of cool stuff in an exchange and kindly helped SM out); @colourshot-draws (our first anniversary zine cover artist and a genuinely lovely person); @postpunkpontypandyphantomthief (a massive Rik Mayall fan and integral part of the fandom); thedinodoodles (for being ahead of the curve and bringing us pirates before the Tumblr obsession); @rikhead (for the sheer dedication to detail on her cover and for her legendary skills in Rik Pic Hunting™); and @smashingblouses (for providing us with the brilliant TYO 40th anniversary zine cover art). I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: SM couldn’t have functioned without its cover artists. Thank you all. Big respec.

There are a few final scumbags I wish to mention and thank - SM's cheerleaders, if you will. These people have brightened up my day on various occasions and their enthusiasm helped make the zine what it was: @anglophobias, @my-blood-is-maple-syrup, @friedhofcreative, @shotsofnovacaine, @5gogh2, @mariigoldmayall, and @fourstarsandahamster.

Finally, of course, I’d like to say a quick thank you to the people who inspired this fanzine in the first place. Without the canon, there would be no fanon. They’re never going to read this thank Cliff but without the brilliance of Rik Mayall, Adrian Edmondson, Nigel Planer, Christopher Ryan, Alexei Sayle, Ben Elton, Lise Mayer, and all the recurring comic guest stars of The Young Ones, SM would have quite literally never existed.

We need comedy in hard times – to call out the shits in power, to keep us grounded, to simply make us laugh. I count myself incredibly lucky to have stumbled across fans of this anarchic ‘80s sitcom on Tumblr. Despite the time gone by between 1982 and 2023 and the changes in society and sensibilities, I think it’s an incredibly good thing that this comedy still connects with us. Most of the people I’ve spoken to on here, like me, weren’t alive during TYO’s initial run. It’s often assumed by certain bastards who shall remain nameless that the youth are trying to kill comedy, that we take offence too easily, that comedy classics are a thing of the past. To them I say: UP YOURS, UGLY! As long as there are people, there will be laughter; and among those of us laughing, there will be the young ones.

So thank you, scumbag reader, for downloading our zines and supporting our bastardly endeavours.

Signing off from Scumbag Monthly for the last time,

- R / @neil-neil-orange-peel <3

"This is it! It's really happening! Who needs qualifications? Who cares about Thatcher and unemployment?! We can do just exactly whatever we want to do! And you know why? Because we're Young Ones. Bachelor boys! Crazy, mad, wild-eyed, big-bottomed anarchists!!" - The People's Poet, 1984

[bow-of-aros]

Day Nine: Wake Up!

Summary: Ted is really tired and would honestly love to take a little power nap at his desk.

Apparently Bill wants him to talk about his feelings like an emotionally cognisant human being instead.

-

Hey guys! I might be running out of steam a little, but I'm determined to keep going strong at least for a couple more days. I might take a break over the weekend since it's thanksgiving and also mine and my brother's birthdays, so I'm gonna be a little busy. This fic got super off track from what I had planned but I hope that everyone enjoys this installment <33

-

Another boring fucking day at work.

Ted didn’t even know what he was doing here half the time. Most of the shit he did just felt like endless busy work. It was all organizing files and pinning email and printing documents.

Normally he was able to power through it with a few shitty coffees and a healthy dose of bothering his coworkers. It was a steady paycheck and that was something he definitely needed.

Doubly so now that he had Peter living with him.

Last night had been exhausting.

Look, he hadn’t exactly been thinking about the fact that he had work in the morning when his kid brother showed up on his doorstep, bag slung over his shoulder and tears streaming down his face, saying, “I told them. They uh— They kicked me out. Can I stay here for a bit?”

The next several hours had been spent clearing out the junk room for Peter to put all his stuff in and then sitting there while he explained what happened. Now, Ted isn’t the best when it comes to feelings, but he’s of the opinion that there’s nothing a cup of hot chocolate and a firm Spankoffski hug can’t make at least a little better.

It must have done something because, right before Peter had finally drifted off to sleep, he’d smiled at Ted and called him Teddy, something he hadn’t done since he was a little kid.

At that point it had already been past midnight, but then Ted made the genius decision to stay up a few extra hours googling variations of How to tell my trans brother he can live with me for as long as he needs without being gross or emotional about it.

Oh, and also Is it still illegal to kill your parents if they’re transphobic assholes? Asking for a friend. But he’d used incognito for that one, obviously. He wasn’t fucking stupid.

What all that meant was that now Ted was sitting at his desk, trying to focus on what he was pretty sure was the correct computer screen out of the three he was seeing.

Maybe nobody would notice if he closed his eyes for a little bit. It’s not like they paid any attention to him anyway—

“HEY!”

Ted’s elbows shot down to rub away the electric feeling of someone goosing his sides. That was his way of being affectionate while still being annoying and he did not appreciate it being used against him.

“Rise and shine, Ted!” He looked up behind himself to see Bill’s smiling face, looking much too proud of himself for what was a subpar joke at best.

God, he is not awake enough to deal with this right now. Maybe if he just closes his eyes and ignores his coworker, he’ll leave Ted alone.

“What— Oh come on, Ted. It’s a beautiful day! Let’s see that smile.”

Well, that didn’t sound good.

“Bihihihihill! Fuck ohohohoff!”

The attack of pokes to his torso has Ted sliding down in his chair. He’s not awake enough to stifle the giggles that start leaking out of him and, yeah, maybe it does make him feel a little bit lighter.

It doesn’t last too long before Bill lets up and Ted’s able to catch his breath, clawing himself back into his seat just to sag right back down into it.

“Hey man,” Bill leans against the wall of his cubicle, a concerned furrow in his brow, “You doing alright? You’ve been kind of out of it all day.”

Ugh, looks like they’re doing this.

“I’m just tired, okay? My parents kicked out my little brother and he showed up at my place last night. I was up way too late trying to figure out how to make sure he feels like he can stay or whatever.”

Silence rings out after Ted stops speaking, and he glances up to see a sort of awed look on Bill’s face.

“What?” He curls his arms around himself, hunching his shoulders self-consciously, “What did I say?”

“Nothing! I just didn’t know that you had that protective big brother instinct in you. It’s really sweet,” Bill looks contemplative for a moment, “I also didn’t know that you had a little brother. I thought that you had a sister?”

Ted just stares at him, willing Bill to connect the dots on his own.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Ohhhhh.”

“Yeah, dude. I don’t want to fuck this up,” He’s still tired and he drags a hand down his face, trying to wake himself up, “Pete’s just a kid! And I’ve never really had to take care of him before. Or myself, really. I don’t know what I’m doing!”

Bill’s silent for a moment before straightening up and placing a hand on Ted’s shoulder, “Look. I don’t really know what your situation with your brother is. But I know that you’ve been walking around like a zombie all day because you threw yourself into figuring out how to make him feel at home, and I think that that’s a pretty good indicator that you’re heading in the right direction.”

Damn. When did Bill get all wise and shit?

“Yeah. Thanks, man. That uh— That means a lot.”

In response to Ted’s emotionally constipated attempt at expressing gratitude, Bill just offers a lopsided grin before heading back to his cubicle.

“Actually, you know what? There’s only an hour left of the day, Ted, why don’t you head home and see your brother? I’ll cover anything that comes in for you.”

Oh God, what is he feeling? What’s this warm and fuzzy feeling in his chest?

Does he actually like Bill? Like an actual fucking friend?!

“Really?”

“Yeah! I’ll see you tomorrow,” His smile fades into something a little softer, “And get some actual sleep tonight, Ted. You’re not good to anyone with half your already suffering brain function.”

Ted’s basically already halfway out the door, but he pauses for a moment to flip Bill off and toss a muttered Thanks over his shoulder.

He walks to the car, taking in a deep breath before sliding in and turning the ignition, listening to his shitty car rev to life.

Yeah, Ted thinks as he starts the drive back home, Maybe I do got this.

[frannyzooey]

Hey Kelli! I love ITD and TMTC so much, and I had a question about plotting - how do you do it? Do you plan ahead/outline, or write as you go? I'm trying to get into writing longer fics, but I find it really hard to fill in the scenes between Point A and B (if that makes sense).

Hey nonnie! ❤️❤️

Writing series can be really hard — it’s hard to fill those scenes, it’s hard to keep pace, it’s hard to create an overarching plot or theme and stay true to it, and it’s super hard to stay motivated sometimes, so I feel this pain!

I typically start with an idea that I let marinate until I have a vague concept of the ending: ie. with ITD, I knew I wanted her to meet Ezra as her best friends dad and I knew I wanted them to end up not together, but on a hopeful note.

Taking that, I start the first chapter and sort of let the story and my inspiration guide me — my brain is of the sort where if I write down the entire plot in a document or on paper, it “satisfies” that need for me and I don’t feel inspired to write the story anymore.

I’ve learned this about myself, but I also need to keep track of inspiration as it hits, so my method is:

Start first chapter and post, knowing a very vague idea of the general direction I’m going in. Consume media (the source material, novels, music, observe life, etc) and taking inspiration from those things, begin the next chapter.

Chapter outlines always start as a google doc, where I dump inspiration via scrambled sentences or words and/or a specific scene, if I have one in mind for that chapter. I then pick at the doc over a course of a couple weeks, brainstorming how to flesh it out, how to link scenes and then wait until I’m truly motivated to write (for me, it feels like an oven timer going off in my head) and then I sit down to fill everything in.

Then I send to my beta for thoughts, then I edit, then I post and start the process all over again. ❤️

It’s a chaotic way of writing, because as specific scenes come to me, I’ll write them down completely out of order — but I like it, because it gives me a lot of freedom to play with the events and time to think of something better, more inspired, or something that fits the characters better now that I’ve got a firmer grasp on them.

I hope this was helpful in any sort of way — I am cheering you on! Series can be amazing things to write because they can 1) push your skills and 2) make you proud and 3) give you the time to tell a longer story and also 4) the interaction you get from invested readers can be really amazing and special. I know you can do it! ❤️

If you ever wanna chat more about it, just DM me! ❤️

[hopecomesbacktolife]

I probably should’ve done this long ago, but I just finished adding all of my fanfic works (*anakin voice* not just the completed and published fics, but the WIPs, and the next chapter notes) to my google docs in a private folder

previously I’d been using we-have-word-at-home (aka openoffice) which has worked great! but after several stories of losing fics, tech malfunctions, etc., I wanted to be sure I had these saved in a way I can access from any device

and in the process of working through both my laptop’s fic folder documents and my posted works on ao3, I did a lot of skimming to be sure all the content and formatting pasted correctly to the new document type and location

and man I gotta say, speedreading/skimming through your entire library of written fanfics makes me feel so proud & happy that these stories exist ♡

like, on all levels but physical, I am clutching these dear little works to my heart like cherished storybooks. I’m so glad these exist. I really do love them ♡

[teamdilf]

I’m posting from a plane! Just enjoying the novelty of it - I’d never pay for Internet normally but I’d written 3,000 words of Lost Souls Like Us when my Google Docs app crashed. The document wasn’t loading and I was terrified I’d lost hours of writing, so I had to check.

It’s all there and I’ve created a back-up just in case. Worth the $10.50 for peace of mind.

(I’m quite proud of what I’ve written. It’s stuff I’d been putting off and it’s very much in draft form, but I’ve included a bit under the cut. There’s Baldur’s Gate 3 ending spoilers, so beware if you haven’t finished the game.)

“You and Mother are beyond,” she says, staring out at the endless rivers of lava and flames of Avernus. “I could go with you.”

“You could. I don’t think you will. You were never the giving up type and you’ve got something you want to see through.”

She stares at Karlach, who grins at her. “Your ma told me that when you date men you always go for the pretty ones. Got a real pretty one for a roommate.”

“We’re just friends,” she says and Karlach bursts out laughing, slapping her thigh.

“You’re practically hitched. Smooch him already; Gods it’s torture watching the two of you pining.”

“I can’t walk,” she says, gesturing to her useless legs, and Karlach lifts her up, cradling her in her arms. Her body is warm - not burning hot.

“Turns out when you’re dead, the shit that kills you gets shut off,” Karlach explains. “Tell me where to go and we’ll go.”

“Why can’t I walk?”

“Zariel wants your soul badly - you pissed her right the fuck off, so I came to make sure you arrived where you decide to be. Took a bit of screwing around but I got here in the end. You and your body are separated so you gotta track yourself down. Where do I go to find your body?”

She doesn’t know. How could she know? She turns and looks up at Karlach, who grins at her. “Your love burns brightly on the horizon. Point the direction and we’ll walk.”

“I…” If she squints, there’s a glow to Karlach so she points at her chest and her girlfriend scoffs at her.

“Not me, you dope!”

She stares for a long while, seeing nothing but flames and smoke. Nothing that glows, but far in the distance, there’s a hint of blue - almost like ice. Or the absence of heat.

“He’s undead,” she realizes. “He’s not going to glow; he’s going to be cold.” She points at the blue on the horizon and Karlach leaps into the air, soaring a good 20 metres through the air and landing with a sharp thud. Karlach leaps again and again, moving towards the blue without shifting course, save to avoid pools of lava or fire too large for her to leap over.

“What if Astarion isn’t with my body?” she asks, and in response Karlach only laughs.

[maschinen-mensch]

@jothwitch tagged me, thank you so much! it has been a while since I did one of these and this one has great questions so here we go:

what book are you currently reading? I’m soon finished with Bono memoirs “Surrender” and I’m in the middle of the The Expanse books, currently in “Nemesis Games”.

what’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this year? I’m answering for 2022 and the answer is obviously Top Gun: Maverick 😘

what do you usually wear? black/white converse, black pants, some dark top /band t-shirts/geek t-shirts/turtlenecks

how tall are you? 159cm which is *googles*… 5′2.6″

what’s your Star Sign? do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event? I’m a typical Cancer and I’m checking now and I see that Liv Tyler, Princess Diana, Léa Seydoux share my birthday 💅 

do you go by your name or nickname? just my mum and one friend call me Nuri, which is just a shorter version of my name

did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child? oh no. when I was really young I wanted to become an animal breeder (?!), then zoologist and in my teens I went into the typical STEM direction. Then after one uni semester of Physics I completely changed direction to Cultural Anthropology and now I’m in the online marketing business.

are you in a relationship? if not who is your crush if you have one? nope. (for details about my situationships you can follow my private twitter account) I don’t have a crush irl, but my current celeb crushes are well documented on my Twitter and here on Tumblr.

what’s something you’re good at vs something you’re bad at? good: taking fandom things not too serious, being aware that it’s all just good fun, keeping my distance and being aware of the parasocial dynamics when it comes to my faves bad: taking things from my job too much to the heart and being always on edge about it

dogs or cats? definitely more of a cat person

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this year? (again taking 2022 for this) the fancams I made for Volk and Kosinski 🥺 I’m super slow with making such edits but I’m really proud of them.

what’s something you would like to create content for? the content I really want to make I already do on my own channels for my own group of (online) friends. I guess I would like to do more and do it better.

what’s something you’re currently obsessed with? Kosinski, my boy :’) establishing himself as one of the big guys in the world of Hollywood movie directors while looking handsome as ever

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year? (2022) mhh Ghost in the Shell: SAC_2045, it already started 2020 but it finished in 2022. And it’s just… not good. :( I’m a huge fan of the classic GITS: SAC seasons so this one hurt.

what’s a hidden talent of yours? I don’t really know an answer for this.. maybe dancing without a care in the world when the right music is playing since most times only strangers (I often go to clubs alone) see me doing that?

are you religious? no but I love to use “jesus” “god damn it” as swear words all the time. and in English, not in my actual native tongue. because Swiss German cursing just doesn’t sound right.

whats something you wish to have at this moment? well. a date with someone pointy, lean and tall with the right kind of sharp cheekbones and nice hair would be cool. 👉👈 otherwise, idk, a Starbucks hot chocolate.

tagging: ok let’s see… @gwinny3k @semperrgumby @saikkunen @krennicss, @bluestockingbaby, @thisisnottheblogyourelookingfor @shipmastered @neonwizardheehee (oh neonwizardheehee I think I remember you have tagged me for something similar in the past but I didn’t do it then, I’m so sorry ;_;). Of course there’s no obligation, just wanted to show I’ve thought of you <3

[shintaru]

Started writing: I don’t exactly remember. I do remember writing fan fiction in my sophomore year of high-school and hating it and dropping it to pick it back up during my senior year during covid and I dropped it again.

Started blogging: a couple of days ago. But my account is a few years old I just never was confident enough to post my writing.

Followers: Currently at 45 I think, I think it’s cool that many people like what I post it makes me happy because I enjoy writing

Communication: i don’t really text anyone on here I would like to make some friends with different writers and readers so I can talk to them about different series that we mutually like I think that would be really fun. But I either don’t know what to say at all or I just can’t shut up so idk how to make friends 💀 other than that I do talk to a few mutuals on here through the comments after I post. I really need to start looking at everyone else’s posts too I use to read more than I write and now I write more than I read 😭 I happened to get a lot of requests which it may not actually be a lot it’s just the fact that I got any at all the amount seems crazy to me.

Likes: I like receiving them because it lets me know which types of things I’m writing people like more and if people actually like what I write. I’m an over thinker so I always think the worst at times and can go from liking my work to hating it in a matter of second so when a few people like it I’m like ok this one’s good. Either way I’ll still write what I love writing and what I’m comfortable with writing regardless of how many likes I get in just here to have some fun while trying to get better at writing.

Requests: I love the requests everyone is so creative especially with the prompts. They pick the best prompts that fit so well together and I get excited to see how I can write that.

Writing: I am a fast writer, I’m quick with making ideas. I usually will come up with an idea and I write it all out onto a Google document and then I go back through it adding the details and then the dialogue. What takes me forever is editing it and re reading to make sure it makes sense then formatting it on here and individually adding the tags 🗿 when I write out my ideas I don’t use any punctuation I don’t look for it to make sense I just want the idea to be out. So when I’m finished writing the idea out I have so much to fix as I’m adding the details but I prefer doing this. Anytime I’ve written out any of my ideas and I added the punctuation at the same time I’d forget parts of it for not writing it down quick enough.

Idk if there is anything that I can’t write atm. I just started so I’ll find out. What helps me is knowing the characters. You can write your fics however you want them writing mostly is for an escape and our own enjoyment me we just happen to share it. When it comes to me I like doing research and knowing everything there is that I can know to get something as accurate as I can. Idk how well I am at that though. I usually have a character sheet of each character that I write and I put things like zodiac signs, personality type, personality traits, and etc and as I write I refer to that.

I write best in the best when I should be in bed. Anytime I’m about to fall asleep I grab my phone because I think of something good to write or I’ll think of something to add to what I’ve already written.

Works I’m proud of: I’m proud of my first smut. I wrote it for Chris D’Char it may not be the best and I definitely want to get better at writing smut. I’ve read smut for years though 💀 I was too young to be reading smut and knowing what it was I don’t remember how I even found out about it but ever since from time to time l’ll read it now I’m writing it . Random but my favorite things to read and write would be angst and smut.

I won’t tag anyone on my post because idk who to tag 💀

Behind the scenes of a Tumblr Writer - Tag Game

Hey there, I love behind the scenes and since this is something that's rarely talked about, let me start the chain... if you feel uncomfortable with a question, just skip it. You can add some if you want as well.

Started writing: I wrote my first Harry Potter fanfic at age 10. Started posting around 15,16 years old. I'm now 31, so...

Started blogging: I started on a German fanfiction site around 2010/11 I think. Might have been earlier too, but back then I was mostly reading, no posting. I really started when I got into One Direction (very late, tbh)

Followers: Currently at 961, which is wild to me. I don't even know that many people IRL. I convince myself that half of them are bots tbh, so I don't freak out all the time.

Communication: The people I talk to regularly are: a few writers who answered after I constantly reblogged and commented on their works and a few people who commented and reblogged my work. Writing and blogging on here can be pretty lonely, depending on your personality and the time you're active (I'm from Europe and a lot of my followers seem to be living in Northern America, so there's the Timezone thing) ... And I found that the best way to strike a conversation is to reblog, comment, and to not be shy. I do wish I got more asks, though....

Likes: I actually filter them out. I have 793 original posts up at the moment. It doesn't give me anything to know how many likes a fic has other than to tell me which characters are liked more than others or maybe that one fic does especially well. My activity only shows me comments, asks, reblogs with tags, and answers to my own asks. I live for the tags and the comments.

Requests: I love talking to people about ideas. That's how I started the plotbunny game because I have so many ideas and so little time. And sometimes an idea just doesn't want to be written out fully. Requests are fun because YAY, I get some mail... but then I freak out because I don't really know how to write this NOW and then I freak out because it's been a week already, two weeks, wait, two months? I'd rather have suggestions where people tell me vague things like "I'd love to read something about this side character" or "Have you ever considered this character with a soulmate trope"? because then I don't have the feeling of failing the request when I write it a little bit differently.

Writing: I am a fast writer. I know that's one of my talents. I can churn out a oneshot of 1k words in less than an hour. People read slower than I write. That can suck sometimes because you've just posted this and you want to know what people are thinking but they're not as fast as you are. I do have a lot of ideas. I want to write constantly but my brain doesn't always want to. I am trying to respect that.

There are also certain things that I just feel wrong writing. I cannot write anything suggestive (I also don't like reading it) and everything past that gives me panic attacks. I can hardly write mean characters and jealousy feels so wrong to me that I cannot write it. I've also overdone it with the soulmark trope and now I feel like everything I write about it feels lifeless.

I write best in the mornings before going to work, but I don't have much time there. I don't need special music (but it helps), but I need to have at least some energy left and at best, no distractions. But I have been writing for over 20 years, so I will say experience helps a lot.

Tagging: @revasserium @shoulmate @lemurzsquad @screamin-abt-haikyuu @toomanygoldfish @satorisoup @emmyrosee @reverie-starlight @alienaiver and @writingsofanomnivore and everyone else who wants to join

[paradisetemporarilymisplaced]

So I was being a basic bitch the other day and listening to my true crime podcasts when it occurred to me just how suspicious Nile’s “death” would look to everyone not in the Guard, leading me to a train of thought that, 2200 words later, absolutely got away from me but I can’t let go so I’m inflicting it on all of you!

To set the stage, we know the movie takes place over approximately a week. Here’s what happens to Nile from the military’s point of view:

She dies is very seriously injured

She heals without a scratch

Just before she’s supposed to be shipped out to Germany, she vanishes, leaving two men concussed (and presumably reporting being knocked out by a woman with short hair wearing civilian clothes)

She goes AWOL for several days

They get word from the CIA that she is to be reported killed in action (details unclear)

So, at the beginning of this very weird week, the USMC has to tell Nile’s family of her death critical injury. What her family was told depends on how long she was dead – a Google search tells me that family will be notified in person within 8 hours of a soldier’s death, but we don’t know how long her first death lasted. For an injury, however, they’d get a phone call to notify them and the unit would arrange for them to visit as soon as the soldier is transferred out of a combat zone. Like I remember when I was in high school, a guy from my church who was a Marine was really seriously injured in a helicopter crash in Iraq and from what I could tell, his parents were told immediately and were flown out to Germany to see him, so it stands to reason that Nile’s family would have been informed relatively quickly after her throat was slashed, one way or another.

And then, she goes AWOL. Her family would be notified while the USMC tried to figure out where she went, not least because the military would want to know if she’s contacted them. (And it’s possible that her family may have been on the way to Germany to see her since we know that’s where she was supposed to go!) So for several days:

Nile’s mom and brother have no idea where she is

They know she was seriously injured and most certainly should not have been moving around on her own

They can’t get a hold of her

The military can’t tell them anything

And the next thing they know for sure is that she was “killed in action.” After being injured and vanishing into thin air. And they presumably cannot produce her body or any concrete evidence of her death. In any case, something sketchy is going on, so they’re like. SMELLS LIKE A MILITARY COVERUP.

In a surprise to probably no one, there is a well-documented legacy of mysterious US military deaths, particularly of women of color (TW for sexual assault in these links). The cases of LaVena Johnson and Vanessa Guillenin particular have made national news because of their families’ persistence in seeking justice. Likewise, Nile is a Black woman, and her mom and brother are most certainly hypercognizant of (a) state violence against Black people and (b) these high-profile cases of suspicious military deaths. So her family are seriously side-eyeing the situation, knowing that (a) the military has a serious incentive (and a documented history) of covering up things that make them look bad and (b) nothing about Nile’s disappearance and supposed death are adding up.

And Andy’s right. Nile does come from warriors. And you know who else does? Her brother.

Don’t get me wrong. Nile’s mom would absolutely not back down. She’d know something was up and want to get to the bottom of it. But based on what I know about Gen X parents (mine), they’re not the most technologically savvy. Like they can use the internet, but they didn’t grow up with it the way we young millennials and Gen Z did. So Nile’s brother takes the lead. And what do zillennials do best?

Social media.

Nile’s brother starts going hard on any site he can, trying to get the word out to see if anyone knows what happened to his sister. He starts a Reddit thread. He starts a Facebook group. He reaches out to the media and true crime bloggers and podcasters à la Sarah Turney, getting loud and being a general nuisance in hopes of getting some answers. He gets his friends and Nile’s friends involved. Maybe eventually Dizzy, Jay, and others from Nile’s unit hear about it and reach out, telling him what they saw and how weird it all was. He’s drumming up interest, and soon “Nile Freeman” becomes a household name (at least among the true crime fans).

Copley is, of course, trying his best, but at this point there is just so much that it’s impossible for him to scrub everything. Sure, he can erase new footage of Nile and the Guard, but what can he do about Reddit threads and podcast episodes that are speculating something weird has happened? Maybe he could hack the sites and shut those things down, but honestly, that’s the last thing he’d want to do, because that only adds weight to the theory that Nile’s disappearance is a military coverup. So eventually he has to tell Andy what’s going on.

Andy, obviously, does not take the news well. However, she is also completely computer illiterate, because that’s Booker’s job and he’s the only one who ever bothered to learn what the internet is in any meaningful way. (She probably calls Booker for advice, and for the record, I think Booker would have no qualms about shutting down conspiracy threads, tinhats be damned, but Copley is too concerned about the consequences. He’s ex-CIA for crying out loud, he knows how it’ll look if they scrub every mention of Nile’s name from the internet.) Maybe she confers with Joe and Nicky but, let’s be honest, they’d be equally unhelpful. So at this point, she knows they have to bring in Nile.

But the thing about Nile is that she, too, knows how to use the internet (duh). Aside from her being a young millennial/digital native, we know from the cave scene where she’s giving Booker suggestions on how to track Copley that she clearly is even more computer savvy than the average person. And for that reason she almost definitely took over the day-to-day tech stuff after Booker’s exile. So I think it would be foolish to expect her to be unaware of what’s happening. She’s not contacting her family or posting on the message boards or anything, but she knows what’s up. So Copley and the team probably sit her down to “break the news,” but we know the girl does not have a poker face (see: literally shooting herself in the foot and not being able to play it cool whatsoever) and cracks immediately, telling them she’s seen everything about her case – she’s not interacting with any of it, she certainly didn’t instigate anything, but she knows. (And she is so goddamn proud of her brother.)

At this point, I’d like to pause and consider Nile’s role in the overall narrative of this movie. She’s set up as a foil to Andy, obviously, but she’s also a foil to Booker. Booker, who, like Andy, is a serious pessimist, but who, unlike Andy, still has very fresh memories and trauma associated with being the new kid, which have destroyed him. In his mind (and Andy’s), if Nile communicates with her family, she’ll become just like him in a century or two – bitter, alone, and stuck with her grief and memories of watching her family die and knowing they died resenting her. It’s a small sample size, but this is the only experience they have to go off of.

But it doesn’t have to be like that.

There’s been a lot of discussion of TOG being a fundamentally queer movie – a group of people brought together because of something inherent about themselves that is different, that must be hidden, that causes others to hate, fear, and reject them. Booker’s backstory is the archetypal traumatic “coming out” story – his family learns who he is, hate him for it, and attempt to cast him out of their lives. He’s stuck with his trauma, his pain, his loss, and it consumes him.

But what if Nile’s family would be the opposite? What if her “coming out” to them as immortal is met with acceptance, love, celebration? What if her family is just overjoyed to have her back, and they don’t care what the circumstances are? I'm reminded of this incredible post from @shitty-old-guard-deaths a while back, where Nile’s mother hits Booker with a frying pan because “my baby let me believe she was dead for FIVE YEARS based on your bad advice???” (which may or may not have inspired this whole tangent). Nile takes the advice of someone who did the same thing she wants to do because she doesn’t want to risk her family’s rejection. She wants the good memories with her family and is afraid that showing them her true self will bring her unbearable pain, forever replacing those memories. But, with high risk comes high reward.

Anyway. Nile and the team are trying to come up with a plan for how to handle this whole thing, but she’s not really participating because she’s too afraid to hope. Until finally, quickly, so she doesn’t lose her nerve, she suggests she reach out to them, knowing that, realistically, that’s the only solution before things snowball even further out of control. The team is shocked, but realize that she has a point. They decide that Copley should actually be the first point of contact, posing as a US government official to talk with them and test the waters.

So Copley goes to Nile’s family’s house to talk with her mom and brother. They’re probably distrustful and apprehensive, but nonetheless secretly ecstatic that their work has paid off. They talk and review all of the information that they’ve collected, including testimonials from the people on Nile’s base and recent sightings (along with photos) of Nile (with the same three people) over the last few years that people have sent them but they haven’t posted publicly. At this point, Copley’s like, yeah this is about to blow up, we gotta put our cards on the table. He convinces them to come with him to some safe house/black site/whatever he can get that is technologically impenetrable (I’m picturing them in like, an interrogation room at a police station kind of deal), takes their phones, locks the doors, and brings in Nile.

What follows is the most delightful reunion scene of all time, bringing Joe, Nicky, and even Andy to tears as they watch and listen from outside the room. With Copley’s help, Nile tells her mom and brother about her immortality and what’s been going on since she died (within reason, of course), and they are thrilled. They don’t understand why (because no one does) but they don’t question it and they see it as a gift from God – she’s been resurrected, she will live, and she has a purpose. Her mother and brother are so happy to see her again and are willing to agree with pretty much anything to stay in her life as long as they can.

So. They set up some complicated agreement (they bring in the other three for support/intimidation as needed) setting the terms of their relationship. They swear Nile’s family to secrecy, maybe bringing up the lab to show how high the stakes are, and they readily agree. They come up with some cover story for Nile’s brother to share on the message boards (maybe that the government has opened an investigation but because it’s an open case he has to shut it all down? Tells people to direct their tips somewhere else? Something to that effect). There’s still speculation, of course, but without Nile’s brother at the helm providing the energy, the hype dies down as news stories are wont to do without any movement. And Nile’s family goes to work for the team. The experience has taught them that Copley can’t possibly do everything himself, especially when it comes to social media, so Nile’s brother takes the lead on the day-to-day tracking/social media while Copley and her mom focus on finding jobs and scrubbing their traces afterward.

So there you have it: Nile gets to integrate her biological family into her found family and spend the rest of their lives with them as it should be, Copley gets some badly needed help managing the reality of social media, the team finally has a positive narrative surrounding outsiders Knowing About Them AND about interacting with people from their previous life, and the audience gets the happy ending to this very lovely and very queer story to counteract the pain associated with Booker’s family.

Plus, you know, I’m a sucker for both a good government conspiracy theory and for Nile getting every good thing she deserves.

[absurdthirst]

The Arrangement {Oberyn Martell x F!Reader}

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Talks of sex, mentions of pregnancy, arranged marriages

Writer Wednesday 8/18/21 @autumnleaves1991-blog​ @clydesducktape​

You bite your lip and look around the very severe and expensive foyer. You had no clue what this is about. All you knew was that two days ago, several serious looking men in dark, expensive suits showed up at your doorstep and informed you that your presence was required in Dorne.

No one had spoken to you, beyond offering you an exquisite five star meal on the private plane and refilling whatever drink you chose. They simply let you stew in your own thoughts after saying ‘everything would be explained’.

You should be nervous, or scared, or hell even plotting to try to get away. Googling Dorne showed you that it was a small country perched in the Mediterranean. They were a kingdom and that raised more questions than it answered as to why you were being summoned.

Before you were shown into the study, a kind older woman came up to you. She was lovely, gorgeous even. Her lovely skin and dark eyes were simply stunning with the luscious dark curls that tumbled down her back. Her smokey voice reassured you once again that you would be explained everything just as soon as the Prince was finished with his earlier appointment.

She took your hand, clasping it as if you had been friends for your entire lives. “You are beautiful and Oberyn will be pleased.” You tilt your head and give her a curious look. “That is the Prince’s name. Oberyn.”

Oberyn Martell. The second son. He had reportedly had affairs all over the world with beautiful men and women, sired several illegitimate daughters that he proudly claimed and flaunted as any proud papa would. Why would he send for you?

“I’m sorry.” You shake your head and give the woman an apologetic smile. “I am so rude. You are?”

“Ellaria, darling.” She smiles at you and your stomach flips. She has something, you can’t quite put your finger on it, but there is something about her that makes her seem like a goddess. “My name is Ellaria.”

“The Prince will see you now.” You jump at the sound of the voice, not even noticing anyone else has come to join you in the atrium. Ellaria had completely captured your attention and everything else had fallen away.

The woman, beautiful and obviously bewitching, leans over and kisses your cheek. Lingering for a second longer than was proper, she gives you a small smirk “Do not keep Oberyn waiting.” She tells you, standing up and letting her hand gently pull out of yours as she walks away.

****

Dark gleaming furniture and velvet upholstery. The study was beautifully appointed, if a bit severe and yet the man sitting behind the desk was not. Glasses were perched at the end of his nose, dark eyes scanning a document in front of him.

He was just as handsome as the pictures you had found. Tanned, smooth skin and dark, slightly curly hair that was starting to be threaded with silver. The thin edge of the chinstrap beard he wears would look ridiculous on most, but it somehow works on him.

Instead of the formality of a suit, he was wearing a bright linen shirt of a buttery yellow, adored with suns with coppery centers, you could see the edges of white trousers and brown leather boots under the beautiful open front desk.

You are alone with him in the room, the man who had guided you in disappearing like a wisp of smoke although you can be certain that he will reappear the moment that he is needed. Biting your lip, you resist the urge to fidget, your fingers curling around the edge of the long, comfortable sweater you had worn on the trip.

“Forgive the solemn atmosphere we find ourselves in, my brother thought it would be quite inappropriate for us to have this conversation at my estate.” He chuckles, still reading the document. “Believed that it would scare you off.” That confuses you and causes you to have so many more questions but you just hum quietly.

It takes him another minute to finish up, his eyes piercing and intense when they find yours. Every bit as hypnotic as Ellaria's, they seem to hold you captive in their grip while a small smirk appears on his handsome face.

That smirk dips down into a frown when he sees your appearance and you feel like a naughty child appearing before the headmaster in muddy clothes. “They did not allow you time to rest and clean up before seeing me?” He asks, taking off what you assume are reading glasses and standing up.

“N-no.” Your voice shakes and you don’t know why you are so nervous. Something about him screams unleashed violence behind a civil facade. It’s like your instinct is to run and yet you feel compelled to stay. “It-it’s o-kay. I’m f-fine.”

His jaw clenches and the rocks in displeasure and you pray it’s not directed towards you. “I apologize on behalf of my staff.” His accent is soothing, and you feel the tenseness of your shoulders relax at his words.

Walking around the desk, Oberyn makes no secret of the fact that he is assessing you. You feel your entire body burning under the weight of his gaze. Dark eyes raking up and down your form and humming slightly to himself while he circles you, as a shark would. A shiver runs up your spine and you lift your chin slightly, gathering your courage as you desperately wonder what this is all about.

Only when he is done does he lean against the front of the desk, crossing one arm over his chest and his other comes up to stroke the thin edge of his facial hair. “You are wondering why you were summoned here.” He tells you, accurately summarizing the thoughts that are bouncing through your mind like a ball.

“Yes.” You don’t stutter this time, but your voice is quiet, making him smirk again.

He turns slightly and reaches for a document, extending it for you to take. “When you were three, your father and my brother arranged a marriage between us.” He announces.

Your gasp echoes around the room and your eyes bulge in your head. Snatching the document out of his hands, you read it. Barely able to make out the legal terms but you see the words marriage and children all included with your name and Oberyn’s.

“I don’t understand.” You shake your head and your brow furrows in confusion. “I- why would my father do such a thing?”

“Your family was a very powerful one in our neighboring country before the fall of their monarchy.” Oberyn tells you.

You remembered vague flashes of upset and unease from when you were younger. Just the general feeling of worry. You had grown up knowing that your family had fled your birth country but you had never known what role your family had there, always assuming they had wanted to leave the war torn country.

“I-”

“I am getting older.” Oberyn announces. “The call for a legitimate heir is getting stronger and my brother claims that I have put off doing my duty to Dorne for long enough.”

“Oh.” You look up at him, the contract for your marriage to the stranger in front of you in your hand. “You want-”

“I am legally your finacé.” He tells you, lifting a brow at your unchanged expression. Most women would be cheering if they found out they were set to wed him. “But- since you were unaware of these things, I would not fault you if you were to break the contract.”

“What would-”

“We would marry.” Oberyn tells you bluntly. “And you would be required to give me heirs. Girl or boy makes no difference. I have eight bastard daughters. But you would be required to be in my bed alone until you have conceived.”

“Alone?” That makes you rear back in surprise.

Oberyn smirks. “I am not one to limit pleasure. I have indulged in all manner of things and would not see it change with a marriage.”

It shocked you to hear a man as powerful as him talk so casually about infidelity and you nearly choke on your own spit.

“Come now dove, this arrangement would be one of our own making.” He gives you a slight shrug.  “Despite the terms set in that document.” He reaches for the paper and pulls it out of your fingers. “We marry, we have children, we get to know one another and indulge in pleasure with each other and others.” He shrugs and gives you another smirk. “My paramour said you are quite beautiful.”

“So we- you want us to marry and for me to have your children and you fuck whoever you want?” You are slightly indignant at that.

“We, dove, we fuck whoever we want.” He tilts his head at you in amusement. “Did you think that I would lock you away while I played?”

You shake your head, unable to believe that such a proposition is being given to you. Oberyn pushes off the desk and comes to stand right in front of you. His hands grasp your shoulders lightly.

“You will be a princess of Dorne. Mother to future generations of princes and princesses. The people will come to love you, as might I.” You gulp at that. “In return, all I am asking is that you not limit pleasure. There is no scandal in allowing whomever you want between your thighs as long as we are both in agreement. My paramour, Ellaria, has shared me for years and yet she comes first before all others. You would be the same.” Oberyn’s eyes are serious and soft as he speaks of his lover and his passions.

You gulp, realizing the beautiful woman that you had been slightly enamoured with was his lover. Of course she was.

“So, dove.” Oberyn reaches up and cups your cheek, his thumb stroking the bone gently. “Do we honor the arrangement, or do you wish to forfeit your betrothal?” He asks, arching an eyebrow at you.

You swallow hard, your throat dry and you open your mouth to speak. “I-”

MasterList

[tenseoyong]

i saw your soon-to-be-father!taeyong reaction, and i was wondering, how do you think johnny, yuta and doyoung would react in the same situation?

johnny is way better at mentally accepting the idea of being a dad. he gets enough practice with mark and the younger boys, he’s already an honorary father so when the ball is finally dropped on him, he’s not scrambling and panicking about how to be a dad. if anything, it just amplifies his personality ten fold: the dad jokes are coming in for the kill. he’s very doting, but tries to hide it to not be so overbearing, snatching up groceries before you even have a chance and uses the excuse, “hey, it’s a free workout, look at these muscles! you think i get these from letting my wife carry the groceries?”

soooooo many pictures. like an outrageous amount of photos are taken during the pregnancy. like i’m talking you have dozens of photo books full of photos before the baby even arrives. he wants to document every step of the way, buying those funny memory books meant for the mom to fill out, but he dedicatedly keeps the book updated with every little development.

johnny’s the epitome of a proud father. as much as you glow through the pregnancy, johnny beams just as much. he’s so happy to announce it to everyone and anyone, even the little old lady at the store while he’s buying dinner, “ah, we need double to food! my wife’s pregnant, see, we’re eating for three now!”

yuta doesn’t take nearly as many photos are johnny does, but he does develop a tendency to catch you off guard with his phone, “you look beautiful, you’re glowing! i wanna capture the moment, stop covering your face!”

he loves talking to the little bean, as he’s dubbed the babe, spending hours at night with his mouth pressed to your growing tummy. getting annoyed when you ‘interrupt’ his private time, “yah, bean doesn’t even have ears yet! it’s cute, but i’m trying to go to sleep!” “shush, we’re having a conversation here!”

im not saying yuta has a pregnancy kink but he gets outrageously clingy throughout your pregnancy, always attached to your side and smothering you in kisses and affections despite you trying to brush him off, the usual pregnancy insecurities growing, but you’ve never been more beautiful in yuta’s eyes than when you’re glowing, heavy with his child.

doyoung is one of the members that gets more nervous during your pregnancy than overly elated—not that he’s not happy but he’s a worry wart. he’s constantly googling and researching what you should be or shouldn’t be eating or doing. he’s almost in a constant state of panic no matter how much the members make fun of him or you try to reassure him, “s-should you be eating that? i think i read pregnant people shouldn’t ea—” “doyoung, it’s peanut butter. where have to see i shouldn’t eat peanut butter?”

a lot of the times, doyoung goes into complete mom-mode. doing everything and anything to help you; making dinner, making sure your lunch is packed, cleaning is entirely on him now despite you trying to argue him down—he wants to help and let you relax during one of the most stressful and difficult things you could go through.

he does go crazy overboard when it comes to the baby’s room—doyoung’s very excited about the nursery, eagerly searching for the best toys and needs to fill the room for his baby to come. dozens of toys from his members and family, his child will be properly spoiled.

[ryuu-to-sobakasu-hime]

Ryuu to Sobakasu no Hime (Belle) Novel | English Translation | Chapter 1

**This is a machine translation. I put it together by extracting text page-by-page from a .pdf version of the Japanese novel, and running it through Google translate. I have only minorly edited some of the more confusing lines to make it more read-able. It is still a very rough translation, but it’s good enough to understand what’s going on. If there is anyone out there who wants to properly translate the novel, I am more than happy to edit it, if you’ll contact me.**

---------------------------------------------

Ryuu to Sobakasu Hime (The Dragon and the Freckled Princess)

In the world of U, Belle met a dragon with a wound on his back.

“Who are you?”

Chapter 1: Invitation

A white line emerges in the darkness.

It slowly approaches. What is this line?

It gradually becomes clear. It's a series of units with intricate details. They are lined up regularly and repeatedly, like cells seen under a microscope.

Cells?

No, it's a "city".

This is a mysterious megacity called "U".

Created by the five wise men, the "Voices" who control the intellect of this world,

U is the ultimate virtual world.

The largest Internet space in history, which has surpassed 5 billion accounts worldwide and continues to expand.

You haven't played "U" yet.

It is displayed opposite to the shaped figure.

"We are investigating various shapes of U particles to embody this ethos, similar to the differences and peculiarities of each person in the world."

“Much like the difference and particularity that makes each individual in the world unique, this explores a variety of different shaped U particles to embody this ethos......"

One of the innumerable U particles is determined.

Authentication is complete.

"Welcome to the world of 'U'.”

U particles pop out from a myriad of smartphone-shaped windows.

Welcome to the world of U.

It's you, authenticated.

The U particle instantly turned into a pretty rabbit-shaped girl.

The announcement echoes.

"'U' uses the latest body-sharing technology so that everyone can relax, gather and enjoy."

Here, the avatar is referred to as "Az" (Az = Autonomous self).

Autonomous self. Az is your alter ego in "U".

The best AI that "U" is proud of is your Az.

Perform automatic generation.

U particles that also logged in are generated one after another in Az and fly from the window.

You can see it popping out.

Your Az - that is, a lovely girl with white, fluffy ears popping out of her sleek hat, descends like skydiving with your first friends.

The sea of ​​clouds, which had filled the field of vision, suddenly opened.

The brilliance of the skyscraper town reflected by the light of the twilight.

You will instinctively yell out in admiration.

The elaborately constructed geometric skyscrapers have no top and bottom, no left and right, and are layered on top of each other, creating an overwhelming evening view that has never been seen before.

A gorgeous shopping mall. Release that left the company while it was still bright in the evening

In the feeling, wander around Fifth Avenue, Champs Elysees, or Ginza.

It's such fun. Az dressed in colorful costumes are like a Venetian costume ball, and it's fun just to look at them. Graphical pieces of florets are spinning and floating like confetti. When you pick up one of them and smell the scent, a refreshing young scent lurks in the gorgeous and sensual. Perfect for the view of this city. You suddenly look up at the heavens while swimming like a bird on the rippling boulevard. Even in places that should be empty, upside-down skyscrapers are so crowded that they look like they are about to fall. There is a huge park that looks like a hollowed-out skyscraper town, and you can look down on the Az who play with it.

Is there a city that makes you feel so free?

You realize without a doubt, this is the center of the world.

The moon can be seen in the gaps between skyscrapers.

The announcement echoes.

<< "U" is another reality >>

《Az is another you》

<< Here is everything >>

The crescent moon that draws an arc below seems to be in the shape of a "U".

<< Reality cannot be redone. But if it's "U", you can start over. >>

<< Now, let's live another you. >>

《Now, let ’s start a new life》

"Now, let's change the world."

Suddenly, the noise of the city was cut off.

It's a song.

Someone is singing.

Where do you hear it? Many Az try to find the voice of the singer.

I'm turning. You, too, listen.

The song is magnificent and delicate. Intimate and powerful.

I'm drawn in unintentionally.

"Over there!"

Someone shouted. The line of sight of many Az gathers at one point.

A whale.

A huge whale dressed up with countless speakers is swimming leisurely between the upside-down buildings. At the tip of his nose, a small figure in a crimson dress can be seen. The song seems to come from there. The whale makes a roaring sound from the countless speakers it wears. She stands on the tip of the whale's nose and sings with an overwhelming voice that is comparable to the sound pressure of the whale’s roaring. What looked like a crimson dress was a flower dress made up of various types of red, such as dahlia, gerbera, and echinacea. She has unrealistically long pink hair. Blue eyes as deep as the sea. A beautiful woman.

And on her cheeks, there are freckles that look like they are engraved.

"Belle!" "Belle!"

The Az looked up at her and called her name from their mouths.

Her name is "Belle."

Lalalai Lalalai Running through a nameless time Unbeknown to anybody To reach that crescent moon Lalalai Lalalai Want to get to know you No matter how many times I awake Feeling like I can't even make a sound

"Belle!" "Belle!" "Belle!"

You are among the wide variety of Az who call her name. I knew it. Unknowingly singing Belle's song. She turns her face and smiles in response to the cheers. For a moment you feel like her eyes meet you and your chest squeezes. Once you see her, you'll be attracted to her and you can't take your eyes off her anymore. You're already captivated by her, even though you've just met her.

"Belle!" "Belle!" "Belle!" "Belle!"

Belle crossed her hand in front of her chest and spread it all at once.

At the same time, graphical flowers were emitted all at once from her body.

The flowers spread all over the city from the top of the whale that swims leisurely. Belle sings loudly, as if to bless every person, every event, every life. Who the hell is Belle?

-------------------

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Dcx2NedPVBEdbfQaU-WC0pJMRmn20ASn7HSC0KY9R7E/edit?usp=sharing ~ Google Doc of the English-translated novel.

ryuutosobakasuhime.wordpress.com ~ English fan-site for Ryuu to Sobakasu no Hime where translations, scans, and other content is posted.

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Mr. Sandman (Ms Venable x reader)

i guess its kinda bad and i actually wanted to delete it, but here we are haha...

this fanfic is inspired by “Mr Sandman” (syml)..

google translate mwuah

summary: i dont want to spoil.. uhm.. Y/N thinks, her life with Mina is perfect and then a letter changes everything? something like that–

pt. 2: https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/643509412185751552/mr-sandman-pt-2-miss-venable-x-reader

Whoohoo 

"I never felt love .." Ms. Mead said.

"Neither have I ..", Ms. Venable answered.

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream

Make her the cutest that I've ever seen

Give her two lips like roses and clover

And tell her that her lonely nights are over

Mina loved you more than anything else in this world. You were her good girl, her princess and you would do anything to make her happy. You looked after the house, you cleaned, you went to the supermarket. You would always ask how she is doing and put her needs above your own.

And at night you lay close to her, your head rested on her chest and she whisperes sweet things in your ear, every evening until you would fall asleep.

And you were so in love with your Ms. Venable. She was so damn smart and proud and her scoliosis had never been a problem for you. You helped her where you could and you loved to see her happy. You were a very emotional person, but Mina was always there to hold you tight.

And while you were taking care of the house, she was the one managing your finances. You found the strict, powerful Ms. Venable, who she was at work, incredibly attractive, but the Mina, who she was at home, was your heaven on earth.

Even though it was almost 4 years ago, you still remembered like it was yesterday when she came into the bookstore, you worked at, to ask for a book. She looked so beautiful when she leaned against the cashier's counter to discuss about Stephen Hawking with you. Many people would describe her as cold-blooded, but you loved her rational way of dealing with things.

Your life seemed perfect and then a little letter should change everything.

----

"I forgot to tell you, that you got a letter  .." you said and leaned in the doorway to watch your girlfriend,who was at her desk working on a document.

"Give it to me .." she muttered absently, still staring at the paper. She held out her hand in your direction and you jumped into the room to put the letter in her hand.

"I've already opened it .." you said nervously.

She raised her eyes in your direction and raised an eyebrow.

"Since when are you reading my letters, Y / N?"

"I'm sorry..I thought it looked kind of important..you know, he's from your college .."

Her gaze froze at your words and you became even more nervous.

"The graduates from your year will meet next saturday and you have also been invited .." you continued slowly.

"I was wondering if we might- .."

"No." she said firmly, still staring at you.

"But Mina .." you moaned.

"I know you hate people, but I think you'd have fun .. something like that is cool .."

"I said no, Y / N ..." she repeated, with a hint of anger in her voice, before taking the letter and tearing it up.

"You are stupid ..".

You stomped out of her study angrily.

---------------------

"You know, my college days weren't that great either .." you said, poking around at your food.

"But I would still go to this meeting .."

Mina sighed.

"You have no idea .. my college days were like hell to me ..".

Her mind wandered back in time to the lost girl she was in college. Everything was actually perfect, Mina was smart and loved to challenge her professors. But then she fell in love with the Meangirl and everything was upside down. She had never been in love and this girl was just as gay as her homophobic mother. And she was the darling of all professors and students. Mina had never even been in her field of vision, no matter how loud she shouted. And, of course, the Meangirl was dating Jonathan Cray, the blond handsome guy everyone adored. But as beautiful as he was, Mina had always seen how he had broken her heart. And every time she had wanted to kill him. She would have looked after her so well, not treated her the way he did.

"You don't have to tell me about it, if you don't want to .." you said when you realized how thoughtful she was and put a hand on hers.

"Thank you, princess .." she said softly and smiled sadly at you.

When you lay in bed in the evening, your head was on her chest, as always, while you read from the book what you just had in common. One of your favorite habits in your relationship.

Unfortunately, Mina couldn't concentrate on that.

The floral scent of your hair made her think of her again.

You smelled like her.

Absent-mindedly, she ran her hand over your bare back.

Your skin was as soft as hers.

"Mina?" You asked, lifting your eyes to look at her when you noticed that she wasn't focused.

Your eyes had the same shine as hers, Mina realized as she stared into your eyes.

"I love you so much, princess .." she muttered, pressing her lips against yours.

And you tasted like her too, at least as Mina had imagined.

You were perfect

Sandman, I'm so alone

Don't have nobody to call my own

Please turn on your magic beam

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream

-------------------------

Mina herself had made sure that you didn't have to work next Saturday, she didn't want you to leave the house that day.

You'd been confused, but her explanation was too sweet and you took the day off.

"You know, I have the feeling we haven't had much time for each other in the last few weeks and I would love to spend Saturday with you, princess ..", she said and you were happy.

Now she was only working for a few hours this morning and then you'd have her back.

You got up from the bed and opened the door to Mina's closet, which was separate from yours.

A few years ago Mina had already given you a hoodie of her own and as cute as it was, you unfortunately had to discover that time had borrowed it quite a bit and the purple was almost washed out. You reached out your hand to her turtleneck and pulled it over your head. Minas lavender perfume got into your nose and gave you a feeling of security

Just as you were about to close the closet, you noticed a box, that was on the floor of the closet, labeled with your name. You knew you shouldn't be getting hold of her things, but your name was on it, so it was your business somewhere.

You bent down to pick up the box, a shoebox. Before you opened it, you sat down on the bed edge. You carefully removed the lid and stared into the box, confused.

There were drawings in it.

Very direct drawings,..drawings of you.

You took the leaves, which had become wavy over time, and looked at them. Mina had drawn that, you were sure of that. Nobody would pay more attention to the details than Mina. These drawings were good, you couldn't imagine why Mina should hide them in her closet. Which is why you decided to hang them up. You jumped happily into her workspace and your good mood fell when you looked at Mina's desk. She had forgotten her bag. She never actually forgot anything. Confused, you grabbed the bag, determined to bring it to your girlfriend.

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream

Make her the cutest that I've ever seen

Give her the word that I'm not a rover

And tell her that her lonely nights are over

-----------------

As you walked through the large building of kineros robotics, you couldn't help but wonder again about this strange work.

You walked past Jeff and Mutt's office and watched in disgust as the two of them were taking drugs as usual.

"Look! The prodigal son has found home .." Mutt exclaimed when he saw you and grinned.

The prodigal son?

Slowly you stepped into these idiots' office.

"Did Venny send you to update your system?" Laughed Jeff.

Just as you were about to open your mouth to answer, someone interrupted you.

"What are you doing here Y / N ?!", Minas voice barked behind you and made you flinch.

You turned around and stared into her wrinkled face.

"You forgot your bag .." you said quietly and held up her bag.

She inhaled sharply.

"Give it to me and go home, you shouldn't be here ..".

Without a word, you handed her the bag before you ran past her outside.

That was embarrassing and you couldn't explain why Mina was so angry. You just wanted to help her.

Annoyed, you got into your car and were about to start when something caught your eye. A young couple crossing the parking lot. He was holding a child, but your attention was on her.

Maybe you got crazy, but this woman looked like you.

Or did you look like that woman?

You could only stare and watch the couple go into the building. When the two of them disappeared behind the door, you blinked in confusion. That couldn't be possible.

Probably she just looked like you and besides, she was about 30 meters away from you.

You shook your head at yourself before you started the car to drive home.

-------------

Mina sat in her office and thought hard, should she be alarmed about what Jeff and Mutt had said to you?

A knock on her door made her jump and she let out a little scream as she saw who it was.

There she was, the love of her life, her hand still tied to Jonathan Crays. She balanced a toddler on her arm.

"Y / N ..", Mina uttered surprised when Y / N and Jonathan entered the room.

"Didn't you expect us?", asked Y / N and grinned.

God that smile.

"Not really .." Mina muttered as she turned red.

"We saw that you didn't register for tonight and now we've come to pick you up.."

Mina stared at couple. Jonathan looked totally bored and didn't look at all like he was enjoying being here.

"Come on .." Y / N pleaded.

"This is going to be fun ... do it for me .."

Do it for me.

These words ached in Mina's heart. She would have done so much for Y / N.

"I can't .." she began.

"I promised my girlfriend to spend the night with her .."

"Your girlfriend?" Y / N repeated with big eyes.

"Of course she can come along if she wants .."

"I really can't Y / N .."

Mina averted her gaze from the woman in front of her, who was now staring at her in disappointment

"We should go now ..", Jonathan suddenly muttered to Y / N.

"It was nice to see you, Mina .." she said quietly.

Mina

Only Y / N was allowed to call her that.

Mina smiled in pain.

"Have fun tonight .."

Jonathan nodded briefly and pulled Y / N out of the room.

---------------

Mina couldn't stop tears from running down her face as she drove home. This meeting today had shown her, what reality actually looked like.

She hated Jonathan so much, when he put his arm around Y / N when they left the building, it hurt so much to see and now she needed you. You were like her drug, she was addicted to the feeling of holding you in her arms.

"Y / N ??" she called for you when she got home.

"I'm in the living room ..", came your voice and Mina was glad that you no longer sounded angry. She took off her jacket and came walking into the living room, always leaning on her cane, of course.

She smiled gently at you when she saw you, but her smile fell as soon as she saw what you were doing.

"Where did you get this from?" She asked sharply, staring at the drawings.

"They were in your closet and I thought they were beautiful, so I thought I would hang them .." you replied, still seeming to be convinced that it was a good idea.

"I think they look so ... aggressive."

"Aggressive ..", Mina repeated slowly, still staring at you angrily.

She remembered the night she had made these sketches. Aggressive was a good word to describe how she felt back then. She had sat at the desk in the candlelight at night. She couldn't take it any longer. Y / N in Jonathan's arms..

With gritted teeth she had scratched the paper with a pencil. Tears dripped from her eyes onto the drawing in front of her, making the pencil blur. No matter how much it would cost, she was determined to take these sketches to her office the next morning to hand over to these two idiots Jeff & Mutt. You should be perfect.

Oh, Sandman, I'm so alone

Don't have nobody to call my own

So please turn on your magic beam

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream

"Hang it up .." Mina hissed at you.

"But Mina-".

"You gotta fucking hang it up .."

You rolled your eyes

"Hang it up yourself if it bothers you .. I try to do everything right the whole day and you're just mad at me .." you said and ran out of the room.

She looked after you and then began to unhook the drawings and toss them into the burning fireplace at the end. She hadn't imagined Saturday like that.

She ran through your house looking for you and finally found you lying on the bed in the bedroom.

"Princess?" She whispered softly as she entered the room and sat on the edge of the bed. Your back was turned to her

and you didn't move an inch

"Please talk to me .." she continued and reached out her hand to run through your hair.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" You let out.

"You've been totally weird since this letter arrived here ..."

You frowned at her.

Mina swallowed.

"I'm really sorry that I was so unfair .. I've only think back to my college days so often over the past few days .."

She looked at you sadly.

"Then talk to me .." you answered and sat up.

"I don't want to talk about it .." she said, grabbing your hands.

"The only thing that matters, is that you know I love you .."

You nodded slowly and were about to say something when she grabbed your face and angrily pressed her lips against yours.

"Mina what-"

"You are mine .." she growled against your mouth and pulled you into her lap.

"Do you understand me? You belong to me .."

--------------------------

The rest of the weekend was perfect, you gave her everything she needed. Mina had always been a bit possessive and you liked that, but the last two days had been different, she was scared. While she held you in her arms, all she could see was Jonathan putting his arm around Y / N, he didn't deserve her.

Monday morning everything seemed to be back to normal, you went to work just like her and in the evening she drove home and was looking forward to finally seeing you.

But as soon as she unlocked the door, she noticed that something was wrong. Normally you would greet her with a beam of joy, but you didn't.

When she called your name several times and you didn't answer, she panicked to search your house. Finally she heard sobs coming from the bathroom. She ran there immediately, if her stick allowed it.

"What's going on, princess?" She asked worried when she saw you standing by the sink.

"Something is wrong with me .." you whimpered and turned to her.

"What are you talking about?", She frowned and got scared when she saw that your right hand was wrapped in a bandage.

"Please don't be angry .." you began, trembling.

"I wanted to cook and cut myself .."

Mina's eyes widened.

Damn.

She grabbed your hand and unwrapped the bandage.

"I don't know what that is .." you said and more tears ran down your face as Mina looked at the cut on your palm. Instead of blood, cables came out of the interface.

She wrapped the bandage around your hand again.

"Jeff and Mutt will be able to fix this .." she muttered.

"To fix ??" you stared at her in fear.

"We have to go to the hospital, there are fucking cables in my hand .. I need help .."

"You are perfect ..", she growled and pulled you into your living room by your healthy hand.

"What the hell is going on here Mina ??" you asked and yanked yourself out of her grasp.

She slipped past you and sat on the armchair by the window.

"Have you never wondered why you are always healthy? Or why you have no friends or we never visit your family?" She asked challengingly.

You paused.

"What are you talking about? I hate my parents, they kicked me out when I came out to them, but you know that .. And don't say I have no friends .. I don't want friends, that's it. The only person I need is you .. "

She let out an amused snort and rubbed her temples.

"Because I programmed you that way .." she said finally.

"Programmed .." you repeated and you felt sick as you slowly realized what she was getting at.

"Y / N you are my creation .. look at yourself, you are flawless .. I have invested so much time in making yourself as perfect as you are now .."

You stared at her. Is that supposed to be a joke?

"I'm one of your robots?" You asked quietly and stumbled backwards.

That's what Mutt meant by "the prodigal son". But that made no sense, your memories, your family ... They all seemed so real ?!

You let yourself fall into the chair behind you.

"You are not just any robot .. you are my robot .." Mina said and came over to you to kneel in front of you.

Those were the strangest words she'd ever said to you.

You felt like you were about to throw up.

"You're perfect, you look like her ...", Mina said and reached out her hand to smooth your cheek with her thumb.

"Like her?" You gasp. Tears welled up in your eyes. Immediately you thought back to yesterday's woman ... So you weren't unique. A cheap copy from a stranger.

"Look at me and tell me that you are not happy with me ..", Mina looked at you sadly.

All you could do was stare at her. You had been together for 4 years and she had lied all the time. Who knows, maybe it wasn't even 4 years and just a few months.

"I didn't tell you, because I love you.", Mina said, as if she could read your mind.

"Because you love me? I thought honesty was the most important thing in a relationship .." you took her hand from your cheek and stood up.b

"Y / N, I created you .. Without me you wouldn't even exist ..", Mina said and leaned on her stick to get up as well.

"You're crazy .." you muttered and ran into the hallway. Mina hobbled after you.

"What is that supposed to be, Y / N?" She asked when she saw you put your jacket on.

"I'm leaving .. you scare me ..".

You grabbed your car key before heading to the door. Your hand wrapped around the cold doorknob, but something prevented you from opening.

You just couldn't. She had given you everything you ever wanted and even though you just found out that most of it was a lie, you just couldn't leave. Where should you go?Your whole life revolved around this woman and you loved it, she made you feel special.

Tears dripped quitetly on your hand, which was still tightly gripping the iron doorknob.

"You can't .." you heard Mina say softly behind you.

"You can't leave me because I programmed you that way .."

Programmed ..

You let out a sob at her words.

You slowly turned to her, she was standing a meter away from you and smiled sadly at you.

"Come here, princess .." she said and opened her arms.

You didn't hesitate for a moment and jumped into her arms to hold on to her while you cried.

"Shh everything will be fine .." she whispered in your ear.

"You are mine and that's the only thing that matters .."

Oh, Sandman bring us a dream

Make her the cutest that I've ever seen

Give her two lips like roses and clover

And tell her that her lonely nights are over

Oh, Sandman, I'm so alone

Don't have nobody to call my own

So please turn on your magic beam

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream