#I’m making that a tag damnit
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itsajollyjester · 1 month ago
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I just want them to be a happy family 😭😭😭
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Posting it as a wip because I might not finish it by Act 3 🥲
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bugeyedfreaks · 4 months ago
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It’s the PPG witching hours so this is probably why I feel compelled to write this but also because that last ask has inspired me…
…I am always on the lookout for PPG fanfictions that people think I may enjoy, so… just to let everyone know if you did not already… I am always open to recommendations…
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amazingmsme · 10 months ago
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Uh, yeah I’ll give you one better
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Works better than any tag system ever could! 😊
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I had a dream, where there was this movie called something like Hoisho and the Windfolk. (Straight up what it was called btw) Apparently dream me has been searching for this movie forever. Cause apparently no one remembers the ending or the twist at the end. They all remember and have clips of the most fucked it scene which many believe is the actual ending of the movie, as well as other clips from the beginning of the movie.
The only reason I’m putting this under more is because holy shit is it long. My dreams and all the damn lore they come with, like jeez man.
It was a movie about these two factions, the windfolks: people who believe in bringing beauty back to the world via ancient statues, who held on to tradition tightly, and they were considered old style despite abandoning the main reason they are even called windfolks.Then there was the other faction, which did have a name but i don’t remember it, they were a faction of larger beast who were a strange combination of lizard, amphibian, man, and machine. They were the future but they were the result of a scientist who made wanted to create the ultimate defense for human kind, or something, which lead to the downfall of the world and a terrible war that ripped the world in two. After the war, Each faction never crossed into the others borders. Then we meet Hoisho, a young lad and part of the windfolk. All kids have this sense of adventure and are wild, so as per tradition, they go to learn about why it is dangerous to go out adventuring, why trying to befriend an enemy is pointless, and why creating something new is dangerous. The windfolk believe that restoring ancient statues that were destroyed in the war will bring them true peace, especially when these statues are built with a rare metal that only came to be because of the war. It was clumpy and strange but shaping it with your tools was almost impossible with how tough the stuff was. When put into the light it would glitter and shine bright colors, and if the statue was done correctly then the true colors would appear. Aka if the statue was of a blonde woman then when it was remade with this special metal in the correct way, you could actually see the blonde hair when the statue was in the sunlight. Creating something new was prohibited since it was seen as a waste of metal, and it was so rare that most windfolk will never see a new collection of it in their life time. They are taught that the mines are the place they will spend their lives, and that they are only called windfolk in honor of their ancestors who flew in the sky. They were also taught to never explore past the tree line or to open the “rat door.” Each of which was basically a death sentence. Hoisho didn’t believe in this kind of stuff and thought that their people should abandon the destroyed past and live as they were supposed to, flying in the sky! But the elders said that windfolks have never actually flown in the sky, however Hoisho, being the explorer he is, found old paintings and relics depicting their ancestors gliding through the sky. So he thinks it’s all bullshit and wants to prove them wrong without giving up his secret hiding spot where all the evidence is, in fear of them destroying it.
However one day Hoisho, accidentally crossed into the other factions territory. He tried to get their attention thinking they were some tall windfolks, but when he grabbed some of their hands he noticed they were far bigger than any of the windfolk. He tried to run, the fog hiding his cover, but he found himself in a crowd, that only seems to be getting taller. The crowd sees him and thinks him a bug, they find joy in keeping him a pet or simply squishing him into a paste. Hoisho, terrified tries to leave but eventually is found only for them to become enraged, accusing him of trying to steal their tech and start another war. Well they won’t let him start the war cause they’re gonna start it! They tell him to let his little town of weaklings know, a war is coming. He is let go and runs off to his home to tell them what happened. They are pissed and banish Hoisho from their home and tell him that if he comes back they’ll throw him into the “rat door” Either way they must prepare for a war. Hoisho then asks why the rat door is so dangerous, with such a stupid name. They explain, (and in the movie it is shown in a different visual style and considered the most fucked up part of the movie) that a criminal in their society will be walked to the door and shoved in. When the door opens screams of what sounds like a strange combination of human like screams and rat screeches. We get to see a glimpse of what’s inside and its filled with a horrifying image. Of people fused into giant rats with body parts scattered about, their eyes being crazed out from what has happened to them. Like it was fucked up.
Hoisho runs off and tries living on his own when he meets a strange man his size, which he thought only the windfolk were his size but this man is clearly not one of them. From his gray skin and jet black hair, which gave off a feather like look. (Windfolk tended to have actual color in their skin, just think humans tbh) He takes the boy in and tells him that everything he knows is a lie…
THEN MY FUCKING DREAM MOM GOES “This movie is cheesy and dumb, turn it off” and she does that. When I’ve been searching for this damn movie for fucking years because I’ve never seen past the part of where Hoisho meets the stranger! And this bitch just turns it off?!?!? And doesn’t even let me watch the rest of it?!!? I was so pissed that I actually woke up.
Anyway from what I could remember and gather I think I know the twist. In the dream I remember there were many different theories on what happens and other theories about the windfolk. Like why is it called Hoisho, and the windfolks, when he is already one of them? One theory is, That the windfolk we meet at the beginning aren’t the actual windfolk. But then where did they go? Some believe that the rat door holds them and that they’ve all become these horrifying monsters behind the door. Others believe that the mysterious man is actually a descendant of the real windfolks, which may or may not have intermingled with whatever Hoisho and the rest of the fake windfolks are. With this theory it is thought that the fake windfolks are actually “rat folks” and that those who are too wild are sent into the door because they will one day break into the monsters that lie behind the door. But there are so many questions about the rest of the story! What about the giant faction? Why were they so into violence but many of them actually didn’t care for it? It was only the soldiers that were itching for a fight. Why did that special metal appear after the war? Is that metal their deceased corpses? They were know to be cyborgs in a way. Why are they huge? Are the folks humans? Or are humans all gone? Are the different folks tiny people who were a result from the war or were they always around? Why the fuck was it considered a fun kids movie when the whole “Rat door” sequence existed? Is the “rat door” the reason why the movie disappeared? Was it so disturbing that everyone agreed to make the movie disappear? How the fuck did my dream mother find the movie?!?!?
So many questions, no answers…although it sounds like a pretty good Internet mystery Or like an ARG tbh haha!
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pinnedangel · 6 months ago
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so. i’m considering rebranding my blog to be much less tied to my identity because i just got one of my irl friends recommended as “in your orbit.” i can guess as to why, i think it’s showing me people who are following/mutuals with my mutuals, which i can assume the connection there. but if it shows MY blog to people that loosely connected to it? then that means there are frankly far too many people who could very easily stumble upon this blog and trace it back to me. no one in my life needs to know how much freak shit i’m posting about unless i give them this url myself.
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arolesbianism · 2 years ago
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Some Tali scribbles I did trying to refigure out her design since it’s been ages since I’ve last properly drawn her and I need to make her a new ref. I was expecting figuring out her face shape to be harder how was I struggling with this so much before wtf
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rizzanon · 12 days ago
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?
m.list | prev | next
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“I want every perimeter of this warehouse locked down—now. No one gets in or out unless I authorize it. Is that clear?”
“Double the guard on every exit. Sweep the surrounding area. I don’t care if you have to go block by block—make sure none of those bastards slip through.”
“Commissioner! There’s someone here.”
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“Quickly, get some paramedics down here. No one touches Batgirl’s mask—is that understood?”
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“Get the paramedics to stabilize her, but that’s it—nothing more. No one treats her except Dr Leslie Thompkins.”
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“What of the drug dealers?”
“We managed to catch most of them, sir. They were distracted by Batgirl’s appearance—probably trying to figure out what to do with her when she showed up and foiled their dealings tonight. But… a few managed to escape in the chaos.”
“Damnit. Notify the precinct to put out an APB. I want every available unit on this. We’re not letting this operation slip through the cracks.”
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“I don’t care who’s out there or how far they think they’ve gotten. We’re shutting this operation once and for all. If Batgirl risked her life for this, we owe her this much.”
“Sir…”
“What?”
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“I’m sorry, Commissioner…. Batgirl… she’s dead.”
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“What. Happened.”
“Bruce, please calm down—“
“Where is my daughter?”
“Bruce—“
“Leslie. Where. Is. My. Daughter.”
“I—I’m sorry, Bruce. I tried everything—“
“Where is she? I need to see her. Now.”
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Where did it go wrong?
How did it come to this?
Bruce swore—swore—he’d never let what happened to Jason happen again. Not to any of them. He’d built walls, created rules, pushed himself to the breaking point to ensure it. All of it was to stop this—this—from happening.
So why… why was he staring at your lifeless body now? Why was the weight of his failure suffocating him all over again? Why had he failed you, just like he failed Jason?
His fists clenched at his sides as he took a shaky step forward. His breath hitched, and for the first time in a long time, the weight of helplessness settled heavily on his chest.
“God…damnit…” he choked, his voice cracking under the weight of his grief. “Open your eyes. Please.”
The room was too quiet. Too still. The sterile hum of the machines was a cruel mockery of life.
Bruce dropped to his knees beside the bed, his gloved hand trembling as he reached for yours. It felt so small, so cold.
“This wasn’t supposed to happen,” he whispered, his voice trembling, the words breaking apart with every syllable. “I promised—I promised I’d protect you. And I couldn’t even do that.”
He bowed his head, his forehead brushing against your hand as his grip tightened. “I’m sorry. I failed you.”
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so… 🫣
have this while i continue working on chapter 3 and 4 🥰
taglist (open): @tricksters-maze @dusk-muse @quethekillerqueen @silverklaus @isupportorbitalbombardment @nxdxsworld @vanessa-boo @coffeeaddictxd @moonsbluekingdom @yuya-bubbly @percythebitchwitch @anonymousdisco @jason-todd-fangirl-14 @redsakura101 @what-0-life @idkwhattoputhete @secretyouthcomputer @witch-waycult @allycat4458 @dazed-lavender @eclecticfurylady @wizzerreblogs @marsmabe @daddysfangirls-dc @hoeinthehouse @beeweensblog @ilxandra @agent-nobody-knows @thethingwiththefeathers @mochiivqi @pix-stuff @narration-ator @nebulousmoon3990 @delias-stuff @froggy-voidd @jjsmeowthie @kore-of-the-underworld @nen-nyy @juthesillylesbain @vikkus-main @emilylouise123 @blueiones @horror-lover-69 @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wassupbroski55555 @reallyromealone @plsfckmedxddy @sea-glasses @203moonysello @luvly-writer @dovey-quacks2332 @love-theangel @hotdinosankles @vebbiewuzhere @animegirlfromvietnam @estreiiuh @simply-lovely78 @twismare @ssak-i @g4bbi3xx @buddee @alor-thes | ask to be added <3 (idk why i can’t tag some of y’all, must be your settings i think 😓)
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moonriseoverkyoto · 6 months ago
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Wearing your brother’s dog tags brings a lot of questions, which meant problems. Especially from men, especially at a bar where said men try to pick you up. Or strike a conversation about the mysterious dog tags. Lucky for you a certain Scot lovingly doesn’t think to ask too many questions. Not until Johnny “Soap” Mactavish’s tongue is down your throat in the back of his car on holiday do the gears begin to turn. But only, yes only after, a few odd weekends of small dates and letters when he can write, he finally decides to ask who your tags belong to between deep kisses and pants. You frown as you pull away to respond, the mood dampened.
“Oh I really shouldn’t say..” you sigh not wanting to explain the long story typically because it ruins the mood “my brother gave me these so I wouldn’t worry about him when he leaves on missions. His call sign is Ghost and…” Shit. Johnny’s whole body seizes up as his heart makes a pitfall down his body. His hearing stops as his brain repeats your joined last name over and over and over; Riley, Riley Riley Riley. Fuck why didn’t he connect the dots. Ghost always was secretive and protective about his younger sister, everyone knew he always declined to bring you as his plus one or even show photos to the rest of the 141. Damnit he knows somewhere down the line if Gaz or even worse Price hears about this that he’ll never live it down. If Ghost hears about this - shit he’ll never live. He finally zones back in to hear you say
“…but that doesn’t matter because you guys don’t run in the same circles, right?” Soap’s nervous smile gives you all the time for your heart to join his in dropping down below. But as your phone rings both of you are sure your hearts have dropped down to hell as the caller id reads: Simon Riley.
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Drabble Drabble, I’m tired and I wanted to put this on paper before it slipped my mind. I’ll expand upon this later but this is mostly an idea for @glossysoap to enjoy because Glossy loves Soap as much as I do. So I hope you enjoy btw not proofread so toodles xoxo - Moon
©️moonriseoverkyoto 2024. please do not steal, copy, plagiarize, or translate any of my works without my permission. do not steal any elements of my theme without permission.
Reposts are 100000% appreciated. Also my inbox is open for requests!
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holylulusworld · 5 months ago
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If the Impala is rocking…
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Summary: If the Impala is rocking…
Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!Reader
Warnings: hangover, crack, implied smut
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“Fuck!” You exclaim loudly. Sitting up was a bad idea. A very bad idea.
Fuck. Your head feels like it’s going to explode. Your throat is drier than any desert, and we don’t want to talk about the kinks in your back and neck.
“Fuck me, twice,” you groan, and bury your face in your hands. Waking up in the backseat of the Impala, butt-naked and hungover wasn’t on your bingo card for this year. “What the fuck got into me last night?”
“I guess,” Dean slowly rises from the front seat, looking as bad as you. He cups his head with one hand, groaning as he’s experiencing the worst hangover ever, “that was me. I’m not sure, though.”
“You’re not sure?” You’d like to snicker, but your head is killing you. “Did we play hide the salami or not?” You move forward and bend over the passenger seat to get a look at Dean. He rubs his forehead, trying to remember if you had sex or not. “Well, you’re naked too.”
“I can see that, Sherlock,” he grunts, immediately covering his crotch with both hands. Yes, it’s that big. “This doesn’t mean we had sex. Let me try to remember. I need coffee first…”
“Hmm…can you take your hands off your crotch?” You point at this crotch, smirking cockily. “Maybe I remember better if I see him again.” You wiggle your eyebrows and snicker.
Dean gives you a bitchface. “You’re a little too eager, sweetheart,” he half laughs, half grunts because his head is killing him too. “I told you to give me a moment to remember if I ruined you last night.”
You snort. “Maybe I ruined you. If I go for a rodeo, I do it thoroughly.”
This time, Dean snorts. “Let’s look for evidence.” He wiggles in the front seat, looking around the car. “Hmm…nothing is out of order.”
“You are naked, me too. How can you say nothing is out of order?”
“There is no used condom, and my dick doesn’t feel like he got action last night,” Dean says. “Trust me, I’d know if we christened Baby.”
“Your dick doesn’t…what?” You giggle. “Seriously, Dean? I feel like I’ll be sore for a week.” You point at your crotch. Dean cranes his neck. Just now he realises, you’re naked too. His cheeks turn pink, and he drops his eyes to his crotch.
“What do you mean?”
“Dude, if you don’t know why I’m sore, I had fun in the backseat on my own, and or with your brother,” you deadpan before sitting back down in the backseat. “Fuck, I should look for my clothes.”
“You’re sore because I rocked your world,” he says while wiggling in the front seat. He points at something on the backseat, a cocky smirk on his face.
Your eyes drift toward the thing catching his attention. A used condom along with your panties. “I told you I’m sore.”
“Yeah, but you got my dick last night, not Sammy’s!” He points out. “I had you begging for more in no time.”
“You remember now?” you rub your forehead. Your memory of the last night is still foggy. All you remember is that Dean and you took a bottle home and decided to have a little victory celebration in the Impala. You parked the car in the garage of the bunker, and the rest is a blur.
“No, but the condom and your well-fucked pussy tell me so.” You roll your eyes. “What? I’m not lying.” Dean insists.
“Well, how about you remind me and come over here,” you smirk at Dean. “Only if little Dean is ready for a second round.”
“Damnit, sweetheart,” you giggle as Dean gets out of the car only to open the door to the backseat. He pounces on you, making you squeal and giggle. “I’m going to rock your world again.”
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Fifteen minutes later you watch a very disturbed Sam run for the hills.
He made the mistake of opening the door to the backseat only to find you and his brother ruin the backseat.
“Sorry, Sammy!” You call after him.
“I’m not sorry,” Dean grunts. “If the Impala is rocking, don’t enter it! You should know better…”
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Tags in reblog.
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astermath · 9 months ago
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hiya! i’m a really big fan of your stranger things work and I was wondering, if youre comfortable of course, a steve x reader period imagine where reader tried to hide their period from Steve, but he finds out and is super fluffy and sweet about it? thank you!
HAHAH wow i have let this ask stew in my inbox since last year thats CRAZY im so sorry my dear,, i was going through old asks and i rlly like this prompt actually so here u go, i hope u enjoy!!!!
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pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader
tags: established relationship, obv mentions of periods / menstruation, reader is referred to as female, steve being dense at first lol, regular sized font below!
wc: 1.4K
notes: while the reader in this fic is female, i am well aware not everyone who has a period is a girl, and not everyone who's a girl has a period!
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Steve is one attentive boyfriend.
It’s the early stages of your relationship, the golden era, the honeymoon phase. And while you’re a still a bit nervous about it all, you couldn’t be happier, because he does it all right.
He knows your favourite snacks, what music you like, what makes you laugh, what makes you cry. He’s starting to figure out your ins and outs, and it’s almost crazy how quickly he’s catching on. You have no reason to feel judged by him at any point, he truly is comfort poured into the shape of a person.
So then why are you staring at your phone right now, struggling to dial his number and just tell him why you can’t make it to your date?
It’s not usually this bad, at least it hadn’t been for a while, so why now, of all moments, must you be forsaken to be terrorised by your period?
You bite your lip, laying flat onto your bed, hand over your lower stomach. It's right where the pain is just gnawing at you, just like the guilt is. But you know you’d feel even guiltier if you just stood him up, he doesn’t deserve that. You sit up, a tad slowly to save yourself from another cramp, and swallow your nerves for now.
“I’ll just… Tell him I’m sick. Yeah… Yeah I can do that.” You think to yourself.
The combination of his number had started to feel natural to your fingers now, unlike how anxiously you pressed the buttons the first time, triple checking before finally pressing call. You're triple checking again now, more so because you're not sure you can handle hearing the defeat in his voice when you tell him you can't make it.
The phone barely gets a moment to ring before he picks it up, and his all too familiar sweet voice comes through the device.
"Hey babe, everything okay over there?"
You pause a moment before replying. "How did you know it was me calling?"
"Lover's intuition." He chuckles, and it makes your heart flutter. It's not fair how easy it is for him to do that to you, but you enjoy it nonetheless. "So, what's going on?"
"I, uh..." God, getting the words out is like pulling teeth. But you'd rather die than let him think you just got cold feet about your movie date. "I'm really not feeling too well right now, Steve... I'm-- I'm so sorry, I'm gonna have to cancel for tonight." Your eyes are welling up with tears before he even gets a chance to reply, just imagining his pretty face losing its bright expression when hearing your unfortunate news.
"Oh," damnit, he does sound sad, "that's okay, uhm... Is there anything I can do? What kinda sick is it?"
Shit, he's gonna make you say it, isn't he? You know Steve is a mature guy, he knows about periods, knows how they work, but you've been told to suck it up and get on with it before... A part of you is still disappointed that you just can't.
"U-Uhm... It's more like, a stomach thing, I guess?" It's the best way you can put it for now, hoping it'll put his worries to rest.
"Okay, I see..." You can nearly hear him thinking, the subtle noise of bags being moved and a fridge being opened coming through the phone. "Uh, how aboouuut... I come over to yours, and we just watch a movie at home? I still got a couple of tapes we haven't gotten to, and I can bring some light snacks that won't upset your stomach too much."
The thought of Steve caring for you while you're sick sends a warm feeling through your entire body. God, how does he just keep getting better? But you can't lie to him, right? It's not like you're really sick, unless you count the curse of menstruation as a symptom.
Before you get a chance to explain, he's talking again, and by the ruckus in the background you can only guess he's rushing to grab all his stuff. "I'll be heading out in a bit, I'll stop by the corner store too, stay put for me alright? See ya in a bit!"
You're sure he didn't realize he wasn't letting you talk, but frankly, you probably couldn't even come up with a response on time anyways. Right now, you just have to worry about looking somewhat presentable, and maybe figure out a way to tell him you're not actually sick.
By the time you've brushed your hair and brushed some mascara onto your lashes, you're already hearing the doorbell. You just manage to pull a fresh shirt over your head, before stumbling down the stairs and stopping in front of the door. With a deep, loaded, sigh you open it, to reveal your boyfriend.
Hair messed up, plastic bag in hand, jacket haphazardly thrown on. He clearly rushed to be here, still panting a little, but in your eyes, he's the image of your guardian angel, your saviour in need.
Before either of you know it, you're crying again, your freshly applied mascara now leaving thin black streaks over your cheeks. Your hands go up to cover your face, embarrassed, not even sure why you're sobbing all of a sudden. The feelings just hit you like a freight train, rocking you before you even have a time to rationalize.
Steve's expression falters, the bag he had in hand dropping to the floor in an instant, stepping in closer so he can carefully wrap his arms around you and pull you to his chest. Not too tight, he doesn't want to startle you. He's a bit distraught; he's really only seen you cry at a sad movie scene before, so he's a bit unsure as to what's caught you to be so upset right now.
"I-I'm sorry..." you manage to mutter through your incoherent sobs and sniffs, effectively ruining the front of his shirt in the process.
"Hey, hey..." His big hands go up to your face, gently cupping your wettened cheeks as he looks into your teary eyes. Hell, the image of you is almost enough to make him break too. "What're you sorry for? You can't help it that you're sick, right?"
The reminder of your lie makes you want to break eye contact in shame, but it's hard to force yourself to lose sight of that soft, caring gaze of his.
"I," sniff, "I lied, I'm so sorry Steve, I-- I'm not sick, I just... I have..."
He watches you expectedly, not upset, just curious. You'd surely have your reasons if whatever caused you to cancel is making you this upset.
"I'm... I'm just on my period and it-- it hurts really bad, it's not even usually this bad, and I felt like I was overreacting and I feel so bad and--" Your ramble gets cut short by his chuckle, the same one that nearly caused you to melt over the phone earlier.
"W-Wha... Why are you laughing?" You're not sure if you should be happy or worried, you're already experiencing so much at once, it's hard to pick one emotion to feel.
"Nothing, it's just, well," he picks up the bag he dropped, opening it slightly to show the bars of chocolate, candy and your favorite chips inside. "I had a feeling."
The sight of it makes you snap out of your state of distress, and you can’t help but crack a smile through your tears. “Seriously? How?”
He shrugs, a sheepish smile adorning his face. “I told you, lover’s intuition.” He pulls you back to him and kisses your head. “There’s another bag in the car with chicken soup in case I was wrong.”
You both laugh, just hugging on your doorstep for a moment. You have to let it sink in, that maybe Steve just is that sweet and considerate of a guy.
“D’you wanna go inside, or does standing outside help with cramps?” He pulls back a little, and you fight the urge to poke him in the ribs for his sarcasm. You love it either way.
“Yeah, let’s go inside. We can watch When Harry Met Sally and I can cry my eyes out again. Sound good?”
“Sounds perfect.”
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the-hilda-librarians-wife · 9 months ago
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Okay yeah I’ll start. Hilda would think that the rule that you can only take a walk in the corridors when accompanied by a nurse is BULLSHIT
Day 6 of being hospitalized. I’ve begun having thoughts like “I wonder what Hilda characters would act like if they had to go through long hospital stays” and “I should write a post on headcanons of Hilda characters as patients”. I am climbing up my walls
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godmadeaterribleerror · 2 months ago
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Chapter 23 - Wherever You're Going
Series Masterlist
Author's Note: We made it, squad. It only took 400k words, but here we are. THE PORN CHAPTER. Also, if you're going to tell me that the gif is technically just Jensen Ackles, consider this. I don't care. It's in the spirits of the chapter (horny as fuck). Chapter Title from Moon River by Frank Sinatra.
Word Count: 22k
Chapter Summary/Warnings: You and Ben have a lot of stuff to do. Smut. All of it. It's here, it's huge, it's horny and emotional. Usual warnings, plus so much fucking smut.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, heavy smut, fluff, love confessions
Read on A03!
Chapter 22 - Chapter 24
You can feel Ben before you’re fully awake. Your face is still pressed to his chest, one hand fisted in his shirt as the other rests near his neck, and his legs are tangled with yours, but you feel him first. Sitting inside your chest, alive and powerful and burning in a steady beat with your heart. Made entirely of love. For you.
Ben loves you.
Everything is warm and safe. When you take a long breath you can smell pine, and when you shift in Ben’s arms—wrapped around your body, holding you carefully like you might vanish—he presses a kiss to the top of your head. He’s here. Ben knows you love him, and you didn’t lose him. He loves you. He loves you and you can feel it everywhere. Even half asleep, you can still feel Ben’s love in your body, focused and devoted and growing brighter when you push your head deeper against his chest.
“I know you’re awake,” Ben’s words are low, deep—rolling from him into your bones and blood—and muttered against your ear. “I can hear your heartbeat.”
“My heart is always beating.” You grumble, words muffled in his shirt. “That’s not proof I’m awake.”
“Maybe,” he shrugs, muscles flexing around you, and you make an undignified, mumbling sound, trying to tug him closer by his shirt. “Got you to fucking talk though. That’s some damn proof you’re awake.”
Your eyes are still closed, but you can see his smug grin as your arms wrap around his neck and your grumble against his skin. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.” Ben hums, something inside him starting to glow. “You fucking love me.”
“I do. I really do.” You sigh. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”
Ben snorts, and when your arms tighten around him, a hand moving up into his hair, his love starts to spread through you. Furious and consuming, waking you up and draining any exhaustion from your body or mind. This is what matters, Ben is what matters, and there’s no need to be tired when he’s here. When he loves you. You blink up at him, and he’s already watching you. He’s so handsome, face cast in the golden light of the sunset, leaking through the windows, and when you smile at him all his love bursts along your ribs.
“Hi.”
A hand drops to your ass, squeezing and pushing you further up his body, and he chuckles when you let out a downright pathetic whine. “Hi, Sunshine.”
It’s not really important who moves first, because you’ll end up right here every time. With Ben’s mouth on yours, his body rolling on top of yours as he kisses you into the mattress, and your hands tugging at his hair when he bites your lip. He tastes like Ben. There’s the coffee and salt, but it’s mostly just him. Strong hands kneading gently at your skin, dropping his tongue and teeth to your neck and leaving sloppy, wet kisses across your collarbone before returning to your face, groaning down your throat when you drop a hand between your bodies and palm his cock, straining through his jeans.
Fucking damnit, Ben’s voice is in your head, rough and low as he lets out another groan. Trying to fucking kill me.
You smile, and squeeze your hand around him. You shouldn’t have worn jeans to bed, Pretty Boy. That’s on you.
Ben freezes, and pushes up on his arms to glare at you. “We’re going to need to figure out how this mind reading shit works. I am not letting you hear every single fucking thought I have.”
Lining all the love and affection in his body is that hot, prickly and sore feeling of embarrassment, and you tilt your head at him. “What are you thinking that I shouldn’t hear, Benjamin?”
“It’s about fucking privacy-“
You wrinkle your nose at him. “No, it’s not. Try again.”
“What makes you so damn sure,“ he grumbles. “It could be.”
“Nope. When you’re dodging a question, you get deeper lines right here.” You reach a hand up to his face, tracing the outer corners of his eyes. “Because you’re trying not to glare more. Tell me what you don’t want me to hear.”
Ben rolls his eyes, catching your hand in his and kissing your knuckles. “It’s not fucking important, we have better things to do-“
“We’re not fucking until you answer my question.”
It’s a lie. Right now, when you can feel his hunger and love all around you—making you more and more alive the longer you’re touching and talking to Ben—it would be very easy for him to ignore your question, shove a hand down your pants, and make you forget completely about this whole conversation. And Ben knows it’s a lie, because he grinds down once, his dick pressing into your thigh and making you swallow a moan, and grins at you.
But he doesn’t keep going. He moves your hand—still tangled in his—to rest beside your head and drops to brush his lips with yours, muttering into your open mouth.
“See, beautiful, half the damn thoughts I have are about you. Touching you and kissing you and fucking you until you make a perfect, pretty mess on my cock. I think about all the ways I want you, about how fucking smart and funny you are, about how I love you so much that it’s made me a fucking pussy. That I don’t care, because I’m going to make you feel so fucking good, and you’re going to forget every word except my name when you cum around me. I think about how it’s a goddamn miracle I get fucking anything done when you’re sitting next to me, smiling all fucking perfect, because all I want to do is bend you over or pin you down and show you how much I love you.” Ben pulls back to watch you with a cocky smirk, squeezing your hand in his and running a thumb over your lower lip. “And one of us has to keep being productive, so if you can always hear how I’m trying not to fuck you during one of Mallory’s stupid meetings, not a goddamn thing will ever get done.”
The fact that he’s just talking to you—looking at you with dark eyes that keep dropping to your lips—and your brain has already gone a little numb doesn’t bode well for him actually, finally, fucking you. All you can do is let out a breathless moan and nod frantically, not really sure what exactly you’re agreeing to, and feel his want and adoration flash through you.
“Words-“
We’ll figure it out. You think as hard as you can, staring at him and hoping he hears. Better things to do.
He pauses, and nods. “You’re okay.”
That brings your words and speech back. Ben needs to understand that you’re okay. You’re warm and happy and safe, and Ben’s everything and yours, so you’ve never been better. “I’m okay. Promise.”
Something in Ben that had been tight around his lungs goes loose, and you know he believes you. “Good.”
“Also,” you frown up at him. “I don’t think it’s mind reading. I think it’s more about my empathy, or something, because it’s not always happening, and I can feel you sort of spike in here,” you poke your free hand at your own chest. “When we’re thinking about each other. So my guess-“ You cut yourself off with a sigh, because he’s not paying attention anymore. Ben’s hunger is roaring around inside him, and his gaze is entirely fixed on where you’d pointed. On your tits. “Benjamin.”
He looks back up at you with a scowl. “What.”
“Stop looking at my boobs, I’m talking to you.”
“I can listen to you talk and look at your boobs, it’s called fucking multitasking-“
“What did I say?”
Ben pauses, and grunts, “mind reading.”
“What about mind reading.”
“Shut up.”
You stick your tongue out at him. “I was saying that it’s not mind reading. It’s probably more about my empathy, and how I love you enough-“
Something flares inside you, inside Ben, and your words die in your throat as Ben drops his mouth back to yours in a brutal, demanding kiss that bruises your lips and makes your hands scrape at his back, makes your every thought turn to Ben. Ben, I love you.
I fucking love you too.
You moan into his mouth, loud and long, and Ben grins, his knee pushes up between your thighs.
“You’re so fucking perfect,” he mutters your name, and you start to grind into him. “You can’t keep goddamn saying you love me, beautiful, you’re going to make me go insane.”
Fuck, Ben, please-
He pulls back, and you let out a high, desperate sound as he watches you. His dick, fully hard, is pressing right against your abdomen, and he’s so hungry, and handsome, and you love him-
“You want me,” he growls, and it’s all you can do not to just burn all your clothes off and beg him to fuck you.
“Ben-“
He lowers back down to your neck, leaves a wet, heavy kiss on that one spot, and wraps his arm around your waist. “Say it.”
“I want you,” your words are breathless, and he grunts against your skin. “Please, Ben, I want you, now-“
“Beg.”
“I did fucking beg, you asshole-“
He’s back on your mouth, sucking on your lips and running his tongue along your teeth, and you can feel him. Pounding against your chest, full of devotion and desire and love, he loves you, and if he doesn’t fuck you now you’re going to kill him-
Ben sits up, fully sits up, and pulls you with him until your head falls on his chest, his arms almost pinning you against him to stop you grinding down onto his legs. 
“We’re getting you some food.” Ben’s words are a low rumble in his chest, and you look up at him with wide-eyes.
“But-“
“You need the energy.” He grunts your name, eyes never leaving yours as his hand traces over the hem of your shorts. “I’m going to fuck you stupid, Sunshine, and you’re going to need to keep up.”
You swallow, trying not to drown in your own drool from how he’s watching you with a heavy lust that you can almost taste. How his hands are tracing light, gentle patterns on your skin, and how you can feel the weight of his love in every touch. He looks like an angel again. Your own love for him must be some sort of brain altering drug, because this same man has been covered in blood and guts and grime and the ashes empires he burned. His hands—holding you against him with such a tender care—have snapped necks and punched people through walls, but, still, in the golden light and shadows of dusk, and haze of how much you love him, he just really looks like an angel. Wholly and entirely the avenging, furious protector you know him to be now, and never again the blindly violent and crude man he’d become as Soldier Boy.
His eyes are so green. You’ve called him vain for how it’s his favorite color, told him what would you have done if your eyes were blue, Pretty Boy? Would green be the pussy color? But you’re no better. You love him, and suddenly the whole world is contained in Ben’s eyes. How they’re dark and pretty and his lashes are so long and you love him. His mouth is moving, but you don’t hear anything except how deep his voice is, because your eyes drop to his lips and now that’s the whole world. You want to kiss him. Kiss Ben’s whole stupid face that makes you wet just from seeing it, and make sure he really understands how much you love him. He really shouldn’t be allowed to be that handsome, it’s making you forget everything that isn’t Ben. Ben, I love you.
A big, warm hand grabs your chin, and when you blink up at Ben—cognitive function slowly returning—he’s smirking. “Who’s not fucking paying attention now?”
You scowl at him. “Cunt.”
“Brat.” Ben kisses the top of your head, moving his hand to cup the back of your head. “Hold on.”
“What-“
“Food, Sunshine.” He grins against your hair. “Then we fuck.”
You scoff, and wrap your arms back around his neck, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “Romantic.”
Ben hauls you up his body, holding you with steady arms, and winks at you. “Only the best for my woman.”
“Shut up,” you mumble, burying your face in his shoulder to hide the flush of your face, and you feel the glow in him become brighter, fueled by amusement and affection and love. Focused, blinding love that makes your heart beat a little faster. It’s everything, Ben is everything, and you need to tell him that. You’ve said that you love him, he knows and he’s here and he loves you, but he might not get it. How infinite and sacred and unstoppable your love from him was. How it exists everywhere in you, everywhere in the world, how it’s as much a part of you as your lungs and heart, how it sits in your head and will remain there forever. How it feels like it’s always been there, like loving Ben was something you were supposed to do.
“You are my woman.” Ben’s words are slow, and you feel a flash of something stuttering in his chest. “I’ll never fucking lock you up, or keep you from doing anything because I love you, and I couldn’t if I damn tried, but you’re my woman.” He pauses, and you feel the bob of his throat against your arm. “If you, uh, if that’s what you fucking want.”
You smile, leaning back to look at him. His eyes are locked ahead, focused on the wall as he carries downstairs. “Ben.”
He grunts, still staring ahead.
“Benjamin.”
This time he glances down at you, stopping at the foot of the stairs, and when he mutters your name your whole body is washed in warmth. It always sounds right when Ben says your name, the way his tone and voice and cadence make you feel important, valuable, loved.
“I’ve been your woman for a while,” you whisper, still smiling softly. “Because I really, really, love you, and I’ve really, really loved you for a while.”
He nods slowly. “Good.”
“Besides,” your smile turns into a grin, broad and teasing. “Your dick is mine, so it’s only fair.”
Ben’s face splits into a grin of his own—full of teeth and joy that you can feel under your skin—and he starts to move to the dining room table. “My dick is yours, beautiful.” His hunger rushes through you, alight with fervor and so hot it makes your toes curl and your heart stumble. “And I’m going to fuck you with it until you scream.”
“You keep saying that,” you grumble as he sets you down at the table. “But I haven’t gotten fucked yet.”
“Someone’s real impatient,” he mutters—sharp affection spreading across your stomach and through your blood—and gives you one, quick kiss on your cheek before drawing back up. “All you have to do is sit there and look pretty while I get you the damn food, and then you’ll get fucked senseless. Deal?” 
You nod, and start to stand. “Deal.” 
Ben scowls, not budging from in front of you as you rise, leaving you stuck between his body and the edge of the table. “Did you not fucking hear the sit there part-“
“I have to pee, Ben.”
He pauses, looking you up and down, and steps to the side with a grunt. “Fine.”
“Why thank you, your majesty, I’m so glad you’ve deemed me worthy of taking piss-“
Ben rolls his eyes as you try to push past him, catching you by the elbow and spinning you back into his arms, kissing you fast and heavy and wet, until your knees are weak and your head is spinning. Going and going and going until you whine and start to try and climb up his body, pulling back with a smug grin and drawl. “Not in a huge damn rush to leave now, are you.”
You glare at him, shoving back on his chest as he laughs. “You’re such a fucking dick, Benjamin-“
He kisses you one last time, gentle and so painfully sweet for how much of an absolute fucking asshole he is, for how much you want him to pick you up, slam you onto the table, and fuck you. But—because he’s an asshole—Ben steps back, leaving you staring at him with an open mouth and an ache between your legs.
“Go take your fucking piss, Sunshine.” He turns, walking into the kitchen, and calls over his shoulder, “but be fucking quick about it.”
You flip off his back, and climb up the stairs in quick steps before half-running down the hallway to the bathroom.
Even with a floor and two separate doors between you and Ben, you can still feel him. Feel Ben’s imprint in your chest, humming and rolling around in content, alight with love. Ben loves you. He’s said it, he keeps saying it, and you keep believing him. All your blood is still in your body, and Ben loves you. It’s making you a little dizzy, and it still doesn’t fully feel real. You keep repeating it to yourself, trying to convince some part of you that’s still vigilant and guarded and afraid, that it’s real. It might be a little too good to be real, a little too perfect to not be a dream, but you can feel Ben and everything in the world is sharp and clear, so this is real. Ben loves you, and it’s real.
When you return to the kitchen, you find him holding a wooden spoon like it’s a weapon, beating ingredients around in a bowl with an almost violent glare.
You stop at his side, looking between Ben’s drawn, concentrated scowl and his egg and flour victim, and grin. “I think you’re winning.”
“Shut the fuck up,” he grumbles, and you giggle, leaning your head against his arm. He slows his movements, and glances at you. “Go sit down.” 
“What are you making?” You ignore his order, frowning at the batter. “Can I guess?”
“No. Go fucking sit-“
“Is it pancakes? Are you making me pancakes?”
Ben drops the spoon, turning to fully face you with a glower. “It was supposed to be a fucking surprise-”
You stand on your toes, grabbing Ben’s face between your hands and kissing his cheek, smiling against his beard as you linger. “Grumpy-“
He turns his head, moving you into a full, long kiss and walking you backwards until you’re bumping against the counter. “Fucking brat,” He mutters, something sparking in his chest as his hands drop to your thighs, a wildfire spreading through your body as he picks you up and sets you down on the counter. He glides his hands up your legs, finding a firm hold on your hips, and pulls back with a half-smirk. “You’re lucky I want to fuck you all goddamn night and need you to eat, or I’d fuck you right here, on the goddamn floor.”
“I don’t think that’s luck,” you mumble, leaning forwards until your brow is against Ben’s chest. “I think it’s mean. Some might call it blackmail.”
“How the hell is it-“
“If I don’t listen to you and eat,” you look up at him with a fake pout. “You won’t fuck me.”
He snorts. “You never fucking listen to me. And,” he squeezes your hips, kissing the space between your eyes and growling onto your skin. “Not a single goddamn thing in the world is going to stop me from fucking you. If Butcher or Mallory walk through the door to try and get us to another stupid dogshit meeting, they can shove it up their asses and wait until morning.”
“Hm.” You wrinkle your nose, even as your hands fist in his shirt. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”
“I’ve fucking told you, we’re getting some food in you first-“ 
“I know,” you lean back, grinning at him. “You’re taking very good care of me, Benjamin. That doesn’t mean I don’t want you to just fuck me.”
Ben rolls his eyes—but you can feel the glow inside of him start to burn—and pushes off the counter before pointing at you with a glare. “Stay.”
You frown. “I am not a dog-“
“You want me to fuck you?” He growls your name, the hunger rioting between your heart and lungs, and you swallow.
“Yes please.”
“Then stay there while I make you fucking pancakes because I love you and I’m a goddamn gentleman, and I’ll fuck you however you want.”
You nod, pressing your thighs together and hoping Ben doesn’t notice the movement. “Okay.”
Ben looks you up and down, gives a sharp nod, and turns back to his bowl. It’s silent for a second as he continues to cook and you try to regain control over your breath.
“Should,” you clear your throat, watching his back carefully. “Should we, uh, talk about it?”
“Talk about what.”
“The whole, um, love thing.”
He pauses, just the smallest stutter in your chest and falter of his movements as he pours the batter into the pan, and grunts, “the hell is there to talk about. I love you, you love me. It’s fucking simple.”
You flush, and your fingers start to tap against your leg. “I mean, I guess. But there’s the whole, um, suppressant thing-“
Ben says your name, turning to glare at you, and you almost bite through the skin of your mouth. “I don’t need you to fucking explain your horrible fuckin choice to me-“
“Hey-“
“Because,” Ben’s eyes narrow on yours, and your protests falter. “I trust you. And I fucking know you,” he grunts your name, and you swallow. “You were probably doing it for some dumb, goddamn sacrificial reason that I’d call stupid-“
“I love you!” You blurt out, and Ben frowns.
“I fucking know that.”
“No,” you shake your head, gaze dropping to where Ben’s grip on his spoon has started to split the wood. “I love you. And I, I didn’t think you loved me, and sometimes when I get, um, excited-“ 
“Excited-“
“Horny,” you mumble. “When I get horny, or emotional, or I think just any emotion that’s really, really overwhelming, the empathy gets away from me.”
“Gets away from you how.” Ben’s words are so calm and steady, even as you can feel him clawing at your chest from across the room. “And the fuck does it have to do with you loving me.” 
“Ben,” you sigh, staring at his hands. “When I get horny, it escapes my body. Just like when I got home, but, um, because of sex or love. I was, I,” you take a long, slow breath, fingers moving faster against your skin. “I was worried I’d make you love me. I didn’t want to make you love me.”
He grunts your name, and you give a small nod. “Look at me.” Ben falls silent until you pull your eyes up to his face, and when you do his jaw is clenched and his eyes on yours are alight. “You trust me.”
“Of course I do-“ 
“Then trust when I say that I fucking love you. I love you now, I loved you when you were gone, and I probably loved you for a long fucking time before that. You are not damn making me love you.” 
“I know,” you whisper. “I love you too. A lot.”
Ben’s love starts to roar in his chest, and he glances back at the pancakes. “Syrup?”
“And strawberries, please.”
He nods, marching over to the fridge, and you follow his every movement. Rough and calculated steps, big, strong hands grabbing out the toppings before glancing at you and holding them up for approval. When you nod he sets them at your side, grabs out a plate, and turns back to the oven, dumping both of the finished pancakes out of the pan and presenting the plate to you with an adorable glare and powerful, resolved care running through his body. 
“Eat.”
You frown at the food. “What about you?”
“What about me.”
“You need to eat as well, Ben.” You cross your arms, refusing to take the plate. “We’re sharing, or you’re making more.”
He scowls, and you know he won’t make more. You can feel Ben’s hunger and desire and need in your body, running up your spine and sitting in your lower stomach. It’s just as strong as your own thirst, just as desperate, and so he won’t take the time to make more. Instead he grabs another plate, moves the larger pancake onto it, and narrows his eyes at you as he holds it out. “Take the fucking plate.”
You smile and let him pass it into your hands. Ben stands between your legs—he’d loaded his up with twice as much strawberries and half the bottle of syrup, but is still somehow managing to match your pace perfectly—and you’re watching each other as you eat. His eyes on yours are intent, stripping you apart and full of reverence, and you pause right before you’re done—mid bite—to frown at him.
Ben swallows so fast it looks painful. “What the fuck is wrong-“
“I love you,” your voice is quiet, tense, but you’re worried he still doesn’t get it. That Ben loves you but still doesn’t quite understand how much you love him. He needs to know how much you love him. “I love you, Ben. So, so much. I love you so much it makes me insane and stupid and reckless, but I don’t care because it makes me feel alive.” You put your plate down, freeing your hands to hold Ben’s face between them, forcing his eyes to stay on yours. “You make me feel alive, Ben. You make me so fucking happy and alive, you make me feel safe and you make me laugh and you’re such a fucking asshole, and I love you. Tell me you understand that I love you, please.”
“I understand,” his voice is low and gruff, and you smile at him. He lets out a slow, long breath, and shakes his head. “Fuck it.”
You hear his plate drop onto the counter, and before you know what’s happening Ben has one hand on your waist and the other tangled in your hair. He pauses, eyes dark and burning into you, and his thumb moves to trace over your lower lip.
“Tell me what you want.” He mutters, and it’s so easy to answer. 
“You-“ 
It’s all he needs. The words barely leave your mouth before Ben crashes forwards, kissing you like it will kill him if he doesn’t. It might. You can feel his hunger, feel how vast and consuming it is, how even as he sucks on your lips and pulls your tongue between his teeth, Ben’s still starved. His hand is dropping lower and lower, across your stomach and trailing onto your thighs, drawing patterns with rough, careful fingers that leave a trail of goosebumps in their wake, and when you legs move up to wrap around his waist—tugging him closer until the only thing between your bodies are the fabric of your clothes—he growls. It rumbles in his chest, pushing out of his throat and vibrating through your bones, and makes your hands curl against his face, trying to bring him further into you. Telling him to take more, take everything.
He groans your name when you drop to his jaw—biting and sucking along its sharp line and his soft beard—and pulls your head back with a gentle yank of your hair. “I’m first,” he mutters, eyes flicking between your dazed expression and swollen lips. “I touch you first.”
“Okay,” you whisper, and Ben falls down to your neck, his hand starting to move far too fucking slowly up your leg. “Ben-“
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he mutters, nipping at the soft skin your throat. “I’ve never seen anyone,” he pauses, chuckling to himself and rubbing small circles on your inner thigh. “Never seen anything, as beautiful as you are. And I’ve seen a lot of fucking shit.”
“You’re,” your words fall into a long, breathless sound of need when Ben’s hand lands right over your center, warm and just resting there as his mouth attacks your collarbone. “You’re so, fuck, Ben, you’re handsome as well, you cunt-“
He grins, rising back up to meet your eyes. “You’re so fucking mean to me, Sunshine. Calling me a cunt when I’m telling you how beautiful you are-“
“You,” a strangled moan escapes your body as Ben’s hand starts to move, rubbing up and down over your shorts. “Ben, please-“
“You should be real fucking thankful I love you,” he drawls, hand tracing up your abdomen, over your stomach and up to your breasts. Squeezing one before pinching at your nipple, smirking as your back arches and you whine. “I love you so much it drives me fucking mad. You’re so beautiful it’s fucking blinding, and the sounds you make,” he leans to mutter in your ear, rolling your nipple between his fingers. “Fucking music. Would fucking live off of them, if I could. I’m going to touch you,” he growls your name, hand falling back to grab at the fabric of your shorts. “And you need to let me fucking hear how good I’m making you feel.”
You nod, hands scraping at his neck, trying not to drown in how much you love him, how much he loves you, how he’s everywhere around you and big and warm and strong and Ben.
“Words-“
“Touch me,” you hiss, and let a little bit of the blood trying to run from your body into his out. Let Ben feel your own unending love and need for him, savoring the way his hand fist in your hair and his cock starts to poke at your thigh. “Fucking touch me, Benjamin, now-”
He rips off your shorts, taking your underwear with then, and runs a finger between the lips of your pussy, holding your gaze as your mouth falls open and your head clears to Ben. Handsome and warm and safe and touching you-
“So fucking wet,” he grins, flicking at your clit and chuckling when you whimper. “Always fucking soaked for me. You love me that much, beautiful? Love me so damn much I can just do this,” he flicks you again, and presses his thumb against you until your hips start to grind into him. “And you’ll be ready for me? Take my cock nice and easy, let me fuck you right here?”
Ben-
“Aloud,” he grunts, starting to rub slow, torturous circles on your clit. “We’ll have all the fucking time in the world to have fun with the fucking mind shit later. Right now I want to hear you.”
“Ben,” you take a ragged breath, and he hums, his middle finger dropping to trace right over your aching pussy, around and over but never in. “Please-“
“Real pretty begging,” Ben’s eyes still haven’t left yours, and his cock twitches against you. “But I think I want to hear you say it again.”
The heat in his eyes is making your body melt into him, and his own love is raw and bloody, pushing up your throat and making you lightheaded. You know what he wants to hear, and it’s so easy to say it.
“I love you,” your voice is firm, louder than you’d thought it would be. But this is the most natural thing to say, and it’s the only thing that every part of your body and mind are telling you. “I love you, Ben. I love you.”
He grins, and one broad finger pushes into you, painfully slow and pausing when you clench around him. “I love you too,” Ben drops his head, eyes locked on yours, breath fanning across your mouth and lips brushing yours when he speaks. “You’re my whole fucking world,” he grunts your name, and draws his finger out before plunging another one back in with it. “And we’re going to go upstairs so I can fuck you on our bed.”
You nod, staring at him in an unfocused daze of Ben, and you’re not sure if you’re agreeing to him loving you or being his whole world or going upstairs, but they all feel equally important. Ben grins, and kisses you again, long and deep with his tongue down your throat, pumping his fingers at a brutal, unrelenting pace that makes you start to squirm, trying to give him a better angle, trying to get him to swallow your every whine and moan, make him stay against that one spot inside of you that he keeps brushing against but never just presses-
He stops. Ben’s fingers pull all the way out and he draws back, looking down to where he’s still rubbing over you, and his jaw clenches when he sees your hips jerk, your pussy squeeze on nothing as you let out a high, pained whine.
“You,” you gasp as he pushes back in once, twisting his fingers before fully removing them once more. “Asshole-“
“Impatient,” Ben smirks at you, raising his hand between your bodies, leaning back down to your ear to hiss, “and so fucking needy, beautiful. I could live off all your pretty sounds, how you beg for me and say my name, or I could just do this.”
He pulls back, using his hand on the back of your head to hold your eyes on his, and licks his fingers clean. His fingers that had been in you, that are covered in you, that made you feel like you were going to burst into flames-
Ben looks like he’s going to say something. When his fingers leave his mouth, he’s probably about to tell you so fucking good or I fucking love you or want you on my face, and if he gets a single word out you’ll cum on the counter. A single low grunt had left his chest when he’d tasted you on his hand and it had made you buck up on his chest, so there’s no way you’ll survive him actually saying something. His mouth opens, his fingers starting to move back down, and you won’t fucking stand for it. You catch his hand, squeeze it once, and use it to tug his mouth back down to yours.
It’s a shockingly gentle kiss, but when you taste yourself—mixed in with strawberry and salt and coffee and Ben—on his tongue, you bite his lip and he groans. It echoes around in your head and runs through your blood, and you fall forwards, breaking your mouths apart as you gain balance on your feet.
“What are you-“ 
You’re pressed between Ben’s body and the counter, and you can feel his dick, rock hard and straining through his pants, so you need a second before you can move. Your hand moves from his neck to cover his mouth, your brow buried in his chest, and you take a careful, long breath before you speak.
“Bed,” you mumble, squeezing his hand again. “Bed, please. Now.”
He grunts, and when you look back up he’s watching you with a set jaw and pure, bright affection in his eyes. An adoration that blooms your gut and spreads through your body, making your knees shake just from the strength of Ben’s care. His love, for you.
He’s definitely going to say something. He’s not allowed to say something right now—not while the sound of his deep voice alone will still make you fall over—so you push on his chest, just enough for him to take a step back, and start to drag him out of the kitchen and up the stairs. You’re barely up two steps when Ben tugs your hand in his, spinning you back around to face him and kissing you breathless. You’re falling over him, grabbing at his shoulders for balance as his arm wraps around you and he starts to walk you backwards, up the stairs. His mouth isn’t ever leaving yours, the kiss growing deeper and your nails digging into his skin for a better grip, and you’re only halfway up when his hand starts to trace up from your knee, to your thigh, to cup right over your pussy.
“You’re fucking dripping on the stairs,” he mutters your name in your mouth, and you whine, trying to grind onto his hand and pull him faster up the steps. “I can fix it, make you cum right here on my hand, but you have to fucking say it.”
“Ben-“ He starts to rub back and forth in rhythm with the roll of your hips, and your arms wrap around his neck in an attempt to keep your footing. “Fuck, Ben-“
“I know,” he’s grinning, the cunt, and one finger starts to tease along your slit. “Say the word and I’ll-“
“Please,” you break the kiss, dropping your head onto his shoulder. “Ben, please, you fucking-“
He moves you another step up, and the finger pushes in, pumping slowly as he rubs circles on your back. “So fucking good, Sunshine, so fucking tight and,” you start to suck and bite at his neck, and he groans. “God, you’re so fucking perfect.“ A second finger pushes in with another step, and you start to straddle the air in a desperate attempt to get him deeper.
“I,” you gasp, shaking your head as you lean further forward. “I, fuck, Ben, I need to-“
Both fingers press against that hidden, aching part of you, and your legs give out. Ben catches you before you even stumble—his smug, lust-driven pride roaring in your chest—and he lowers you gently to rest on the steps, fingers scissoring and twisting inside you, so rough and good and he’s kissing along your jaw, groaning as you whimper in his ear, going deeper-
He pulls back, eyes fixed on where his fingers are pushed inside you—moving in and out, faster and faster until your eyes start to blur—and that focused glint in his eyes makes your hand drop to his jaw to turn him up to you. Make Ben look at you, make all that intensity and unending care run through you as he pulls you apart on his hand.
When your eyes meet—affection rolling around in your body, Ben’s body—he grins. “You want to cum, beautiful?”
“Yes-“ 
His fingers pause, drawing almost all the way out, and your mouth falls open in a silent scream when he adds a third. 
“Ben, I’m-“ 
“Hold it,” he grunts, and his hand reaches up to grab yours on his face, watching you carefully. “Don’t stop looking at me.”
You nod, and Ben starts to move. He’s unforgiving, fingers moving in and out of you so fast you can’t keep up, can’t grind against him or speak or think anywhere outside of Ben. Watching you and moving inside you, and he keeps crooking his fingers for just a second before pulling out and leaving you squeezing around nothing, and you’re so close, you’re fucking drooling and making pathetic, desperate sounds, but fuck this is so good, he’s looking at you like you’re holy and his hands are so big and firm and his muscles keep flexing and you feel so good-
“I’m,” you fall backward when Ben’s hand drops to your abdomen, pressing you further into the floor, stilling the jerks and squirming of your hips. “Ben, I’m close, please-“
He hums, and twists inside you. “Look at me.”
It takes effort. It takes all the will and strength in your body to crane your neck, using your hold on his jaw to anchor yourself and meet his eyes, but fuck it’s worth it. Ben’s eyes become borderline feral, his free hand dropping to press against your clit and rub in furious, large circles, and when he hooks his fingers inside you everything explodes. You can hear the wet sounds of Ben’s movements against you and your own moans, but it’s all distant, barely breaching the haze of your orgasm. You’re bucking into his hand, grabbing at his wrist and closing your legs as your whole body shakes, and he won’t stop looking at you. He’s starving, his face is still wild with desire as he pulls you up and grabs your arms, wrapping them around his neck.
“You have no fucking idea how beautiful you are,” he growls into your ear, and you gasp as he starts to stand, keeping you steady in his arms. “Just fucking watching you cum almost made me lose it. Feeling you squeeze my fucking fingers, seeing how pretty you look when I touch you, fuck, if you look half that good cumming on my cock, it might damn kill me.” You hear the door open, and peak over Ben’s shoulder to see him kick it closed behind you.
He sets you down on the bed, hands moving up to cup your face and hold you upright as he pulls you into a long, sloppy kiss that makes you start to melt into his touch. When Ben stands back up—thumb running over where he’d bitten on your lower lip—his voice is gravely, and you can see the outline of him pushing against his pants.
“Stay here,” he mutters, eyes scanning over your body in the dark. “Need to see you.” 
You want to touch him. You want him to feel that same blissful high he’s made you feel, want to feel the weight of his cock on your tongue and to taste him cum down your throat. You want to ensure he really gets it. Gets that he’s everything, and that you love him, and that fuck you want him. You need him. You might need Ben more than you need oxygen, need to hear him groan when you take him in your mouth, hear him say your name when you suck his dick and feel his hand in your hair, feel all his love and desire for you burn you alive from the inside.
He’s moved away from you—stalked away from the bed to flip on a light—and you can see the ripple of his muscles on his back. You slide off the bed, taking a half-step before falling to your knees and waiting for him. Watching him move in the dark and not bothering to pretend he’s not the most important thing in the world. That—if he’d let you—you’d stay on your knees for Ben for the rest of your fucking life.
The switch flips, illuminating the room in a low, warm light, and Ben turns. His eyes fall right to yours, and you swallow. Hungry is becoming too light a word for how Ben’s watching you, because it’s deeper, bigger, and far more important. He’s looking at you like you’re a star that’s fallen right into his hands, and now he gets to hold you and keep the light in you burning. Like you’ve climbed out the hollows of the earth just to see him, and he’d be a fool to deny you what you’re asking. His imprint in your chest is rioting—bellowing and scraping at your ribs like it’s trying to climb out of you, out of Ben—and he’s looking at you like he loves you.
“Hi,” you whisper, and Ben nostrils flare. 
He grunts your name, and you have to press your thighs together to stop yourself from ruining the carpet. “I fucking told you I was first-“ 
“You did go first,” you start to crawl towards him, eyes still on his, and he lets out a deep, lustful sound that sends a shiver of want down your spine. “This is a two way road, Pretty Boy. I want to suck your cock,” you rise back to your knees, looking up at him with a sweet smile as you trace a hand up his leg. “May I?”
Ben’s throat bobs, one hand steadying him on the wall as the other runs through your hair. “I’m supposed to fuck you-“
“You still can,” you shrug, palming him over his jeans. “But this way you get to cum in me twice.”
“Fuck,” Ben’s hand curls on your head into a fist, pulling your head back a little further as his chest rises in uneven movements. “You’re, fucking Christ, I,” you squeeze him, and he lets out a rough hiss. “You want to suck my fucking cock?”
You nod, hands moving up his belt. “If you want-“ 
Ben rips his jeans off, and you try not to salivate when you see how hard he is. When his hand returns to your hair, angling you further back—so you’re looking up at him through your eyelashes and your mouth is perfectly level with the red, weeping head of him—you smile at him, and he groans.
“You’re so fucking-“
“Ben,” you whisper, savoring the way he shudders when your lips brush over his dick. “I’m doing the work.”
He swallows, eyes flashing. “When I fuck you, I get to cum in you.”
“You were already going to cum in me-“ 
“And,” his eyes narrow. “I get to do all the work.” 
You give him a flat look. “Any other demands for me to suck your cock, Benjamin?” 
He pauses, actually thinking about it, and mutters, “shirt off.” 
“What-“ 
“Take your shirt off. I want to see your pretty fucking tits bounce.” 
“Oh, well,” you drop your hands down to the hem of your shirt, muttering under your breath. “Since you asked so nicely-“ 
“Brat.” 
You stick your tongue out at him, letting it brush on the underside of his cock, and pull your shirt over your head. The flash of want in Ben becomes so powerful you almost give up on your whole bright I do the work idea, but your own need to touch him still triumphs. Ben’s moved his dick to rest against your lips, pressing it down against them in an inpatient, silent request that makes you grind onto the air, and you smile up at him again. His jaw is set, and he’s looking at you like you’re some sort of twisted salvation.
I love you, you feel him twitch against you, and part your lips just enough for Ben to push himself between them. Your hands fly up, one holding his thigh to steady yourself and the other prying his fingers around his cock away, replacing them with your own. I love you, Ben. Now relax and let me suck your dick.
Something fevered and bloody and starved rushes through Ben’s body into yours, and you don’t wait to hear his response—verbal or in your head—before you start moving. You take all of him in one movement, letting him bump the back of your throat, sucking as your teeth scrape lightly and your hand moves to play with his balls, then pull back as slow as you can manage. You do that a few times, feeling his muscles tense and rubbing your thighs together in a poor attempt to relieve yourself even a bit, before Ben growls your name and you have to pull yourself slightly back to blink at him.
“If you don’t stop taking your sweet goddamn time,” his jaw is clenched, his words through teeth as he throbs in your mouth. “I’m going to throw you on the bed and fuck-“ 
You suck as hard as you can, teasing his head with your tongue, and your hand starts to pump over what’s not in your mouth as you grin at him. Better? 
He groans, a vein twitching in his neck as he throws his head back, and you don’t think you’ve ever really lived before this. It’s an odd thought to have right now, when you’ve started to move your head up and down his cock, and you're getting so wet you can feel it running down your leg, but you’ve never felt alive like this, in a way that’s not a task or some sort of trial. But now you’re alive in a way that’s for you. He looks like a fucking god, and tastes like salt and earth and Ben, and the sounds you’re pulling out of his chest are so primal. It’s making you feel powerful, how this immovable man, made of steel and gunpowder and his own pure will, is saying your name like it’s a prayer. You feel alive, and perfect, and beautiful, and whatever other Ben deems you in the vulgar praise falling from his mouth.
“Fucking, god, fuck you’re perfect,” his hips have started to rut into you, and you adjust to account for them, squeezing his balls to make the movements bigger and swallowing on him when he starts to pull back. “You’re so fucking good and perfect and you look so fucking beautiful, sucking my cock all good and pretty, so warm and fuck.” His hips stutter, and you know he’s close. “You’re a goddamn miracle, Sunshine, it’s, goddamnit, I fucking love you,” his gaze drops back down to yours and you whine around him. “I love you, fuck, you have no fucking idea how much I love you-“
You pull almost all the way off, swirling your tongue over his top, and plunge back down with a moan and hollow of your cheeks. When your nose bumps against his muscled abdomen you suck on him, forgoing pointless things like breathing, and Ben makes a deep, feral noise that’s half your name and half a swear when he cums. You have to close your eyes to focus on not gagging, letting him shoot down your throat and taking as much of it as you can, but there's more than the other times you’ve done this, and you’re a little dizzy from the way his orgasm is crashing over your body and overwhelming force of his love bursting in your chest, so a fair amount gets away from you.
You’ve barely pulled off of his dick when Ben’s hauling you off the ground, kissing you with a passion and fury that sets your blood on fire, and grinning against your mouth.
“You’re too fucking good at that,” he mutters your name, and you start to squirm against him, trying chase release with the sound of Ben’s voice. “I swear to fucking Christ, you’re going to be the death of me.”
“Ben-“ 
He pulls away from you, tossing you onto the bed and letting out a gruff, satisfied sound at your whimper. “I need a minute, beautiful. I got a hell of a lot more stamina than any other fucking pussy you’ve been with, but I still need to be properly goddamn hard to fuck you like you deserve.” 
“Please, fuck, Ben,” you lift your hips off the mattress, trying to show him how you might implode if he doesn’t touch you right fucking now. “Need you, I need you now-“ 
Your words fall into a heavy moan as Ben reaches out, running his middle finger up your core, pressing on your clit for only a second and smirking when you keen against him. “You need me? Need me to take good fucking care of you, beautiful? Need me to fucking ruin you with how good I fuck you, take you so fucking well it wrecks you, make you moan my name every time you just fucking sit down?”
“Yes, I, Ben, please-“ 
“Say it.”
“Ben, I love you, I need you, I want you so fucking much it’s,” his hand pulls away, and you whine. “Benjamin, you fucking asshole-“ 
“I said I need a fucking minute,” he snaps, pulling his shirt off and crawling between your legs. “But I also love you, brat, so I’m going to help you fix your horny, messy fucking problem. Get you good and well damn ready for me.” His arms wrap around your legs, hooking your knee over his shoulders and holding you still as his breath warms your center. He looks between where you’re wiggling under his hold and your wide, pleading eyes on his, and frowns. “Relax,” he mutters your name, and you pull at his hair. “I’ve got you. Always fucking got you.”
You nod, taking a long breath and dropping your head back as Ben squeezes your thighs. 
“Good,” he’s so full of devotion, his voice is so deep and easy, it washes over you and relaxes your body in his hold. “Really fucking good, Sunshine. Hold on.”
It’s all the warning you get before Ben dives between your legs, licking a long, heavy strip up your cunt and sucking on your clit until you’re panting, grinding onto his face. He chuckles at the pathetic, incoherent pleas leaving your mouth as he nips at you and drops back to tongue at your pussy, and you feel high. He’s so good at this, he knows to kiss your clit to make you roll your hips and to bump his nose against you when he plunges his tongue into your body. His beard is tickling and scratching at your inner thighs, and his grip on your body is firm and bruising and it’s so fucking hot, how he squeezes your ass every time he flicks your clit with a too light lick and he pull you further against him when he starts to tonuge-fuck you.
“Ben,” you’re breathless, one hand pulling at his hair while the other tangles in the sheets. “Fuck, slow down, I’m-“
You cut yourself off in a desperate whine, and he even though he doesn’t pause, his voice in your head is gruff. You’re okay?
He’s actually asking. There’s no order in the words, no demand for you to let him keep going. He’s just checking on you, and fuck you love him.
I’m okay. About to cum, though-
Ben yanks you up, pulling your hips off the mattress, and goes faster. He’s savage against you, growling onto your wet heat and eating you alive, making your head spin and heart beat out of your chest, so close, so fucking close to letting go, to the coil in your stomach snapping and launching you into pure fucking bliss-
Ben. Ben, I love you. I love you, please, Ben-
I love you too, beautiful, he bites your clit lightly, flattening his tongue over you before dropping back to where you need him so bad it’s almost painful. Cum for me.
You think you scream. Your whole body contracts as you hit the edge, Ben groans into you, and your orgasm hits you like a train. You’re rolling around in his grip, not sure if you’re trying to get away from how he’s setting your whole body alight or push further into him as he keeps going. Ben’s still going, kissing and licking and sucking at you until you’re clawing at his scalp, your thighs are crushing his head, and you’re so sensitive it’s almost painful.
“Fuck, God, fuck-“ you gasp, and Ben grins against you.
Had enough, Sunshine?
You glare down at him, your elbows wobbling as you try to support yourself. Get up here and fuck me, Benjamin, or you’ll lose the privilege.
He rises up, looking at you with an almost drunken haze in his eyes. “You taste like fucking heaven,” he says your name with a smirk, and one rough, warm hand snakes over your stomach to rub your still fluttering pussy. “You think you’re ready for me? Think you’re going to be able to take all of me?” 
It might kill you. He’s hard again, you can see his cock pressing against the mattress, and it’s really only hitting you now how big he is. Ben’s huge and thick, you might end up split open on him, but there are worse ways to go. For one, dying of how much you love him. How thirsty you are for Ben to just fuck you, to fill you up and make you scream, would be a lot less enjoyable death.
“Words-“
“Fuck me,” you look back up at him, and don’t care if he hears how desperate you are. “Now, Benjamin. Fuck me now.” 
The glow inside his chest erupts, and your body shakes from the sheer force of it, of Ben. 
“Do you know,” he drawls from above you, and he’s going to be a cocky asshole about this. You wouldn’t have him any other way, but if he doesn’t hurry up you might go out of your mind before he’s even inside you. “Exactly how long I’ve wanted to fuck you, Sunshine? Fuck you right? Fuck you senseless until you’re just a wrecked, hot fucking mess, until you cum so hard you see fucking stars?”
“Ben-“
“Months,” he hisses, eyes tracing over every curve of your body like he’s trying to memorize it. “You have no goddamn idea how many times I came in my hand to just the fucking thought of you, of how beautiful you’d look beneath me like this. You fucking haunted me,” he growls your name, pressing you down into the mattress as you squirm against his hand. “There isn’t a single thing I haven’t thought about doing to you, a single way I haven’t pictured fucking you like the perfect brat you always are. But,” his eyes move back to yours and he smirks. “This is beyond fucking anything I managed to dream up. You’re all fucking sweaty and horny, so goddamn wet and desperate for my cock, already got my cum on your perfect fucking tits, already so fucking wet. I’m going to fuck you dumb, Sunshine. I’m going to fucking ruin you.”
“Please,” you gasp when his hand leaves its spot between your thighs, and you can’t look away from him as he spits on his hand. “Just, fuck, Ben, just do it-“
He slaps your pussy, and you fall flat on your back from the sheer force of his love, in your body, numbing your every thought to Ben. Ben, I love you. I love you so fucking much, but if you don’t fuck me right now I’m going to kill you-
Ben laughs—rumbling his chest as he crawls over you and echoing through the room—and it’s the best sound you’ve ever heard. His hands start to trace small patterns on your hips, and when he’s hovering above you his smile is so wide. Cocky and adoring and bright, and your mouth goes slack just from the sight of it. You love him. It’s actually going to kill you how much you love him, how safe and cared for you feel under him, how he’s caging you naked between his broad chest and mattress but you’ve never felt more free.
His hand traces down your body, pinching and rolling your nipple between his fingers before moving lower, and you couldn’t look away from him if you tried. He’s handsome, he’s always handsome, but this is different. In the high of all the pleasure and bliss he’s pulled from your body, he’s melting and molding you against him with just the sight of him. Chiseled features and distinguished jawline, boundless, pretty eyes that are blown out with love and lust but still have a ring of that green that will follow you for the rest of your life. Full lips that you get to bite and kiss, perfect lines that draw and contract in a silent language you’ve memorized and will never forget, and dark hair that’s falling over his brow. He looks like someone designed him. Like a statue of a god whose only job is to worship. Some sort of ironic deity who’s dedicated to caring for whoever loves them, whoever really, truly, purely loves them the way you love Ben.
Your hand rises up, brushing away the hair from his eyes because you can. Because Ben is yours, and you love him, and you feel a little infinite when his muscles flex around you and the love in his body flickers with something soft. Your eyes move slowly back down from his forehead to meet his gaze, and you don’t think anyone’s ever looked at you like that. With such a burning, wrathful, devout and world-ending reverence. Your hand moves to rest against his beard, and you try not to be too smug about how he leans into it.
“Hi, Benjamin.” You whisper, and when he grins at you, you can’t stop your smile from overtaking your face.
“Hi, Sunshine.” His head drops to your neck, and his words are muffled on your skin. “Ready?”
You nod, swallowing when he twitches again your thigh. “I love you.” You mumble, spreading your legs as Ben lines himself up against you and leaves an open-mouthed, adoring kiss on your pulse point. “I really fucking love you, Ben. You have no idea-“
His mouth crashes up into yours, and you moan as he kisses you breathless and dizzy into the mattress. “I have some fucking idea,” he mutters, and his imprint in your chest becomes consuming. Rushing your body with focused, primal, raw and bloody ardor and love. Ben loves you, loves you so much it shakes the earth, and you make a happy, easy sigh when he draws back, brow pressed to yours and his voice is hoarse. “I love you too. A fuck ton.”
You give a small smile, hands playing with his hair between your fingers. “A fuck ton, huh? That’s a whole lot, Pretty Boy, are you sure?” 
He snorts, “brat,” and pushes into you.
There’s no resistance. In the wake of Ben touching and tasting you, of saying every foul and teasing thing under the sun all while mixing it with small reminders that he loves you, you’re so wet you could probably solve a drought in a small country. But he’s still going slow. Ben’s moving into you so slow that you can feel every single inch of him, filling you up and making your legs shake before he’s even halfway to bottoming out.
You squirm slightly, trying to adjust to accommodate him further, and he hisses in your ear. “Stop moving.” 
“Stop going so slow-“ 
He swallows your protests with his mouth over yours, and shoves the remainder of him into you with one movement that makes you gasp, your hands curling in his hair as he hits that one spot, then goes further. Ben’s in you, just resting in you without any relief or movement, his head still resting against yours. It’s the only boundary left between you now, skin and muscle, because Ben’s imprint in your chest has spread to cover every inch of your body and make it impossible to know if all the love when your legs move up to lock around him is his or yours. It’s Ben and you, the same in every way that matters, with your breathing in a matched, ragged rhythm and your whole body aware that this is it. This is everything. Ben’s whole body is pressed to yours, his arms tensed over you, and when you squeeze around him once, just to see what happens, he makes a low groan that sets your blood on fire.
He grunts your name, watching you with that awe in his eyes mixed with starvation, and this time the squeeze is involuntary. “I told you to stop fucking moving.”
“I’m not moving-“
Ben gives you a look that almost melts your body, because it’s so dry and grumpy and adoring and hungry, and fuck you love him. “You are moving.” He thrusts once in the smallest, most painfully good movement you’ve ever felt, and your mouth falls open. “I can fucking feel you moving, Sunshine. I can feel you everywhere,” his words are being muttered against your slack lips, and there’s a light dancing in his eyes on yours that makes you a little dazed. “You’re so fucking tight, taking me so fucking good, so perfect under me, fucking full of me.”
He rolls his hips once, and you moan, trying to grind up into him. “Ben, please-“
“I do the work,” he grunts, voice strained and something molten running around in your gut. Ben’s gut. Fuck, it really doesn’t matter because he’s talking again, and his voice has never been so low and demanding, sending a shiver up your spine. “You lay here and let me fuck you until your smart fucking mouth is screaming my name and your pretty eyes are rolling back in your head.”
Please-
“Words,” he snaps, eyes narrowing. “Need to fucking hear how stupid I fuck you, beautiful. Hear what I do to you.”
You swallow, pulling the words from some far corner of your brain that’s been pushed away by the song of Ben in your body, and almost lose them again when he makes another small, torturous movement inside of you. “Fuck, Ben, please-“
“There it is,” he grins, voice teasing and a hand moving to cup your cheek. “Was that so fucking hard.”
“I’m,” you take a long, strangled breath as he tilts your head back, kissing across your face but never on your mouth. “God, fuck, I’m not the hard one-“
He chuckles, pulling back to watch you with that reverence, and you’re alive and love him and if he doesn’t do something about that soon you’re going to murder him. “Such a fucking brat,” he mutters, pulling himself out in one, smooth motion and watching your eyes widen. “So fucking beautiful, fucking needy, and I haven’t even really fucked you yet-“
“Benjamin-“
“Say it like that,” he grunts through his teeth, only the head of his cock still pressed inside you. “Keep fucking saying it like that.” His hand moves back to tangle in your hair, and you wiggle under him, trying to bring him back into you. “God, you’re so fucking good-“
“You’re such a fucking dick-“
“You love me.” Ben grins, pushing in just enough to make you whine. “And you love my fucking dick.” His eyes scan your face, and his words lose the taunting, playful tone. “I fucking love you, Sunshine. Look at me.” You blink at him, and he kisses you once, moving just a little further back in. “I love you so much it’s going to be the fucking death of me. Makes me lose my goddamn mind, how much I love you.” He rises back up, and everything in him is devotion. You can feel it, somewhere so deep in your chest and wrapped around your body, that Ben’s love for you might be the most powerful force in the universe. That it’s fitting so perfectly with your own love, you can barely tell the difference.
“Ben-” 
“I love you,” he says your name, gaze dropping to watch himself push all the way in, a low groan leaving his body when he pulls out with the most sinfully wet sound you’ve ever heard. “You’re the love of my fucking life, and you were goddamn made for this.”
“Just,” he pushes back in, and your head falls back. “God, just fuck me-“
He pushes your head up, forcing you to meet his eyes. “Don’t stop looking at me.“
“Ben-“
His face cracks into a grin, his hand carefully moving your brow so he can give it a gentle, deceptively sweet kiss, and a low grunt leaving him when you make small, wanting noise. He draws himself back above you, and he’s everything. He’s firm and strong and wrapped around you, twitching inside you and running through your body, and all your words have devolved into desperate, pathetic moans.
His voice is low, eyes never leaving yours as he leans down, lips brushing with yours. “And fucking beg.”
You’re past dignity. Ben’s stretching you open around him, hitting every single spot inside your body that makes your head spin, and the warmth of his body, his touch, the feeling of his love, is making your brain fall into a natural, easy pattern of Ben. “Please,” you whisper, your stomach tensing and heartbeat picking up just from the unyielding attention of Ben’s gaze, peeling you apart for him to know and care for and love. “Please, Ben. I love you, but please fuck me before I lose it.”
You can feel his mouth curl into a smirk, feel him leave your body again, and any protests or pleas or curses die in your throat when he speaks, muttering against your lips and squeezing waist.
“Good girl.”
Something hot and wrathful shoots through your blood, your whole world going blurry with the ache and need for him, and Ben finally starts to move. Slow, with long, deep thrusts that make your mouth slack and a little drool run over your lips, his warm, firm weight over your body pinning you down and stopping any attempts to grind on him and take more.
“Already so fucking wrecked beautiful.” Ben’s lips are still brushing yours, and he grunts when your tongue darts out to try and lick him. “But you need to look at me.” 
Your eyes shoot open, and you swallow when you see how close he is. His nose is bumping yours, breaths trading between lungs, and his jaw is clenched as he starts to angle his hips to hit you deeper, a powerful, craving fervor shooting between your bodies when you clench around him.
“There you are,” he kisses you once, soft and gentle, and you whimper as his pace starts to pick up. Finding a steady beat where he doesn’t pull out quite as far, but still ruts back into you and slams against your cervix. “Christ, you’re tight. Goddamn perfect, fucking squeezing me like that, so fucking good-“
You moan, your hands tugging at his hair and your arms wrapping around his back, the muscles of them flexing with every movement and god he’s so warm, you feel so full-
“Fucking knew how good you’d be, under me all pretty and dumb from my cock. Fucking soaking me, driving me fucking insane with how wet and tight and perfect you are, could spend a fucking lifetime here-“
“Ben, please-“
“You want that, Sunshine? Want to spend forever fucking impaled on my cock?” His tone is taunting again, but you’re too far gone to care. His big, calloused hand is rubbing firm patterns on your waist, and he keeps bumping against a part of you that you hadn’t been aware of before. A soft, spongy and sensitive place in your body that’s making your whole pussy contract around him, driving any sort of coherent thought out of your brain as it all fades to Ben. Deep words that you only half-understand, ripping you open and apart without even trying, ardor and passion and furious love coursing through your every nerve and making your blood electric.
You whimper, scraping at his neck and unable to unlock your gaze from his. Ben.
“Fucking words.” He rolls his hips with this movement, and you moan. “Say my fucking name, beautiful. Tell me how fucking bad you want me.”
“Want you,” you whine, trying to chase his mouth and squirm in his hold. Get just a little more friction. “Fuck, Ben, I want you so bad, I need you-“
He hums, and grins at you. “Say you love me.”
“I love you, Ben, please, more-“
“Tell me how it feels.”
“Good, so fucking good, you’re so big and, fuck, it’s so good, need more-“
He grunts your name, and when you fall back enough to earth to really study his face, it’s serious. “Say that you know I love you.”
“You love me,” you whisper, he starts to move faster. Slamming in and out of you with an abandon, his hand on your waist kneading and pulling at your skin in a perfect fucking pain. “You love me, Ben, I know you love me-“
You’re high. Ben kisses you, devouring every single moan and scream of his name, chewing them with teeth on your lips and running his tongue over the roof of your mouth, and you’ve never felt this good. He won’t stop moving now, the bed is creaking under his brutal and almost feral movements, and he’s everything. You can’t think, can’t speak, can’t do anything but claw at the rippling muscle of his back, grind up into him, and gasp when his hand traces over your abdomen to your clit, giving you feather light, teasing flicks as he rams into your body.
“Please,” you gasp, and the pad of his finger presses against you just as he rips back into you. “Benjamin, please-“
“So good,” he mutters, lips still never fully leaving yours. “You’re so fucking good, Sunshine, fucking Christ you take me perfect. Fuck, I love you, you’re so fucking hot all wrecked on my cock, most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen-“
Every word of his filthy, foul praise is setting you on fire. Ben thinks you’re good, and you’re molded against him perfectly, and fuck, Ben-
It would be overwhelming if it wasn’t the closest thing you’ve felt to heaven. How Ben’s so deep in you—feels so right snapping his hips against you and driving his dick inside you—that you’re not sure how you’ll fare once he pulls out. How this is ruining you, because you feel fucking alive and Ben is worshiping you in way that makes you think he has some sort of guide to your body. How to run a thumb over your nipple when he wants you to spasm under him, how to time it with every ripple of his muscle so that your whole body goes limp in his arms. How to kiss you deeper when he’s pulling out, and suck on your lower lip when you start to whimper for more friction. How all his ministrations and effort and love for you is making your blood start to burst out of your body, how you trust him so much you don’t care to try and hold it back.
Ben’s movement stutters inside you, and he moans. His finger on your clit jerks as his whole body tenses, and kisses become brutal. Sloppy and desperate, the sounds he’s making causing your legs to spread wider, your hands to rake up and down his back like you can make him move faster.
“Close,” you manage to push the words out, and Ben’s movements grow more and more uneven. “Close, Ben, fuck-“
“Think you can cum with me?" He growls, and you nod frantically as his finger on your clit starts to rub fast circles that set your pussy on fire. “Think you can be a good fucking girl for me, Sunshine, and fucking drench my cock? Let me fill you up like you deserve?”
“Yes, Ben-“
“Cum,” he orders, saying your name down your throat, and your whole body lights up. Your release, wet and warm, falls out of you, and you’re too fucked out to even care that you forgot to warn him. It’s all pleasure, racking through your body and the world grows fuzzy everywhere but Ben. Still jerking inside you as his hot cum shoots into you your pussy, spreading a kind of blissful ease and sense of belonging through you, groaning your name between your parted lips, muscled, strong arms wrapping around you and rough, big hands touching your with a soothing reverence as you burn.
You’re burning, and Ben’s right there with you. Inside you. His own orgasm is doubling the force of yours, and he’s everything good in the world around you.
But you’re not actually on fire. There’s light and smoke all over your body, but the sheets are still soft under your bare skin, and Ben’s hair and skin between your fingers isn’t being scorched and twisted. Ben is still all around you, movements stilled and making deep sounds that roll through your bones as he finishes inside you, but it’s not just that. Your bodies are still both salty with sweat and cum, and the taste of coffee and strawberries should be long gone from Ben’s mouth, but all your senses are invaded with pine. Ben and pine and vanilla and strawberry. When you blink up at him, he’s glowing. It’s a misty haze of Ben, and it’s the whole world. The whole room is cast in a green light, like you’re under the ocean or in depths of the forest, and the whole world is Ben.
As you come down, Ben’s brow falling to yours and your whole body relaxing in his arms, the light fades, and you’re left with every nerve in your body ablaze and your every thought addled with Benjamin. I love you, really love you. Please do that again, I need you to do that to me again, that was good. Really good. You’re really fucking good, Ben, and I love you.
But things like words are still far away from your brain, so when you keen against him all you can do is make a loud and choked sound that you don’t fully understand, but Ben somehow manages to.
“I know, my love, I’ve got you. Always fucking got you.”
That’s new. My love is new, and god it’s going to drive you out of your mind. He loves you. Ben loves you, and you’re his, and he’s got you. It kickstarts your brain, and you smile, fully smile, up at him. Handsome and proud and watching you with a devotion you can feel in your blood. Your blood, all yours and twice as strong with Ben mixing with it.
“I love you.” It’s so natural to say. You’re supposed to say it, and he’s the only one who’s really meant to hear it. There’s so much love for him, tearing through your body and igniting your head, and nobody but Ben would have to resolve and will to take it all and throw it back to you. “Benjamin,” you mumble, your hand gliding up his neck to tangle in his hair. “You’re, I love you.” 
He nods, head dropping lower to press against your neck as he settles above you, just holding you. Tracing gentle patterns on your skin and touching you in that reverent, careful way. “I love you too, Sunshine. You’re the goddamn light of my life, and I love you so goddamn much.”
You hum, and your smile feels right. All of this feels right.
You make real fucking good sounds when you cum on me, as well. Squeeze me like a goddamn vice. A pause, and then, are you a fucking squirter?
You glance down between your bodies, and shrug. Sometimes. That was kind of a small one though. I’ve been known to cause plumbing issues.
His hands still on your body. Are you fucking with me. 
No. I do squirt. Not always, but sometimes. I know it’s messy, I should’ve told you-
You’re going to do that again. I’ll fucking kill someone to get you to do that again.
You giggle, slowly combing fingers through his hair, basking in the weight of Ben above you, the heat of his body relaxing your every muscle. Horny old man.
I just fucked my woman, I’m allowed to be as fucking horny as I want. There’s a pause, and his head moves up, chin resting on your chest as he glares at you. And I’m not old.
I’m your woman, you grin at him, and a sharp flash of something prideful and insatiable runs over your skin. You’re not sure if it’s yours or Ben’s, and you don’t think you care to know anymore. I’m allowed to call you old all I want. Should’ve chosen a nicer girl if you didn’t want to be reminded that you’re a fucking dinosaur.
Don’t want a nicer girl. He wink. I love my bratty, mean fucking pain in the ass.
That shouldn’t make you almost cry, but it does. You blink at him, and even in your head your voice is soft. I love you, Benjamin. You’re a grumpy man-child, and I love you.
He swallows, kisses your cheek, and starts to rise away from you.
You scramble up on your forearms, watching him with wide eyes. “Come back-“ 
“Unless you want to sleep covered in fucking cum,” Ben drawls, glaring down at you in a way that’s not going help any argument to let him leave the bed. “I have to go to the bathroom so we can clean you up.”
“I don’t care.” You reach to his shoulders, trying to pull him back fully over you. “We can shower in the morning-“
Ben’s face splits into a cocky grin. “We?”
“Yes, Ben, we-“
“No tears,” his eyes narrow, scanning over your naked body with a gaze that’s meant to be purely analytical, but still makes you press your slightly sore thighs together. “You’re okay.”
You smile at him when his eyes find yours again, your whole body wrapped in his stone concern. “I’m okay. I just want you here-“
That’s all it takes for Ben to fall back onto you, and your hand moves up to trace the defined muscles of his shoulder, only for him to catch it and kiss your knuckles.
I’m here.
Something in you melts, and you lean up to kiss his cheek. Thank you.
Don’t.
No. Thank you, Benjamin, you cunt.
He grins at you, and squeezes your hand. Brat.
“Can I ask you something,” you say aloud, and Ben gives a small nod for you to continue. “How long have you, um, known? That you love me?”
“Few weeks,” he mutters, watching you carefully. “Loved you longer, though.”
You frown. “What do you mean?”
“Doesn’t fucking matter-“
Benjamin. You give him a flat look, and he sighs, the prickly, sore feeling of embarrassment on his skin returning.
“I’ve never, fuck,” he pushes the words through teeth, hand tight around yours. “I’ve never loved a damn person like I love you. I didn’t get it. I’d do fucking anything for you,” he snaps your name, and you’re almost amused by how annoyed he sounds. “And I know you probably fucking got it right away, but I’ve never been in real love, fucking apparently, so-“
“Ben,” you whisper, words gentle but firm, just enough to make him stop ranting. “I have been in love before, and this does feel different. It took me a while to get as well.”
His jaw is still clenched, but something loosen in his gut. “How long.”
“I don’t actually know,” you shrug. “I realized a few months ago, and it felt like I’d always been in love with you. I, um,” you swallow, squirming a little under the intensity of Ben’s gaze. “I just didn’t really care how long I’d actually loved you. It’s something that felt like a part of me, so I wouldn’t even really know where to start figuring out where it came from. I know that I love you, and that’s it.”
“Why didn’t you tell me,” he mutters, eyes scanning over your face. “If it’s been goddamn months, why didn’t you just fucking say something.”
“I didn’t think you’d love me,” you mumble, staring at Ben’s jaw, unable to fully meet his eyes. “And I don’t, um, I couldn’t risk losing you if you didn’t want me like that.”
“Don’t be fucking insane,” he snaps, and you swallow. “Even if I was so much of an idiot fucking pussy not to love you, I’d never fucking leave you. As long as you want me here, I’m going to be right at your goddamn side. You burn, I burn,” he grunts your name, and you smile. “That’s fucking that.”
“You burn, I burn,” you whisper. “And I do want you here, Ben. You’re my best friend, and I like having you here.”
“Good,” he mutters, dropping his brow back to your body. “I like fucking being here. You should get some sleep.”
“We just spent all day sleeping-“
Wrong. His voice is stern and low in your head, his arms wrapping around your waist. We just spent all night fucking. MM said we’ve got a meeting with the team in the morning, Sunshine. And you still need the rest.
You sigh. But-
I’ll be right fucking here. Sleep.
Overall, you’re going to have to figure out how to combat that particular effect he has on your body. How to use it selectively, like when he’s telling you to cum. But, right now—with Ben sprawled naked and warm above you, his hands kneading and rubbing on your skin—you let the hum of Ben’s love in your chest wash a comfortable, easy sleep over your mind. 
You don’t have nightmares, or dreams. It's a restful, calm sleep that you wake up from in what feels like a blink, that makes your every thought clear and your body feel fresh as you watch the light of dawn break. Ben’s still above you, his snores filling the room, and you smile. This is right where you’re supposed to be. In a bed that smells like pine and belongs to you, with a warm, handsome man you love so much it will kill you, having tangled your legs with his in sleep and holding you so tight you’re trapped beneath him. You could burn him, or poke him, or slap him to wake him up, but you don’t really want to. Ben looks so peaceful, so content and comfortable, and you love him too much to wake him up.
And then he shifts around you, his fully hard cock poking into your upper thigh, and he needs to wake up now. He’ll have a lifetime, several of them, to sleep all lazy and content above you, but right now you’re still sensitive from last night—still aching for him and desperate for him everywhere—and you’re not doing this again. His breath on your neck is starting to pick up, he’s started to rut against you, and when the low, grumbled sounds of hunger start to leave his mouth, that’s it.
“Ben,” you hiss, leaning down to speak in his ear, and his hips jerk, almost drawing a whine from your throat. “Benjamin, wake up.” 
He mutters your name, and you start to push him up, off of you. You can feel your pussy start to contract around nothing—he’s not doing you any favors by pressing his tip of him against you in his sleep—and you at least need him off of you so you can take care of yourself.
“I swear to fucking god, you cunt,” you forgo a soft, quiet tone, and your voice rises to a loud snap. “If you don’t get your huge fucking ass off of me, I’ll-“
Ben’s eyes shoot open, finding yours in a second, and your words turn into a squeal as he sits up, pulling you onto his lap in one, fluid motion.
“Good morning, Sunshine,” he mutters, voice gruff and heavy with sleep, and you can still feel him pressed against your ass. “What’s so fucking important you had to wake me up from my very good dream about you?”
You wrinkle your nose at him. “You were on top of me.”
“I’m always on top of you,” he winks, and your body is very traitorous, letting that movement—combined with how his chest is still bare, and his lips are a little swollen from sleep, and’s the most attractive man alive whom you love very much—send a spark through your body, right into your pussy. “What’s wrong.”
It’s easier to show him, so you grind down on Ben once and his hands tighten on your hips.
“You have a problem, Pretty Boy.” You give him a too sweet smile and heat flashes between your cores. “Couldn’t let you deal with it yourself.”
His nostrils flare, and he bucks up into you once, making you almost collapse of his chest. “Don’t think I’m the only one with the fucking problem, beautiful. Think we can help each other?”
“Maybe,” you lean down to speak against his lips, and Ben slides you further up his lap. “How would you want to help me?”
“Right here,” he grunts, eyes dropping down to your tits—pressed against his chest—and where you’re straddling him. “Fuck up into you. See if you can take me going slow this time. If I can make you so fucking dizzy I need to carry you to the dining hall.”
“Oh, shit,” you mumble, starting to twist in Ben’s lap. “The meeting-“
“We’ve got time,” Ben’s hands hold you firm above him, and when you turn around to frown at him, his eyes are narrowed. “Plenty of fucking time, my love. All the damn time in the world for me to fuck you, take real good care of you, and get you in a hot shower before Mallory starts being a fucking bitch about how we’re late.”
You stay against him because he called you my love again, and it’s doing something to your brain that makes the world bright and happy. You still manage to glare at him, though, and snap, “how long.”
“Two hours.” He grins, pushing slightly up into you. “Two long fucking hours for me to make you moan.”
If you were a stronger woman, if you weren’t so blinded by love and lust and thirst and Ben, you have him and he loves you and you can feel it and fuck anyone who tries to take that away from you, you’d have rolled off of him, given him a sharp glare, and said Benjamin, we have work to do, you can fuck me later.
You are not a stronger woman. But Ben’s cock is pressed right against you, his hips are rocking just enough for him to slide easily between your folds, and he’s watching you with a drunken, high look in his eyes, so you think you’ll be able to find peace with that. All your love is spreading between Ben and your minds and bodies, and it’s making him look a little feral, so you think you’ll survive being susceptible to his low voice and handsome face.
You fall onto him, pressing your lips against his in a heavy, long, deep kiss, and you grin. Prove it.
He’s not bothering to prep you this time, but you’re so wet you can hear it when he shifts you into a better position, so it won’t really matter. Ben runs one finger between your pussy lips, spreading them open as he slowly pumps his cock, and when he guides himself to line up against you, he pauses.
“Gonna go slow, Sunshine,” he grunts, and you nod. “Arms on my neck.”
You listen to him mindlessly, wrapping yourself around his body, and it only takes one, deep thrust for Ben to push himself up into you.
He lets you move on him. His head is falling to your chest, one big, rough hand palming at your tits, and when you roll your body above him he just takes a sharp breath and lets you move. You start to bounce on him, your mouth pressed against his brow and his hold on your waist growing bruising, and when he starts to suck on your throat with a fervor you almost scream. He yanks you down, stilling your motions as he throbs inside you, and he bites at your pulse point with a flick of your nipple.
Slow, his voice rumbles in your head, and your breath hitches. One more chance, beautiful, then I’m taking over.
You nod, and his thumb soothes the hurt on your breast as you start to grind down onto him. You let every whimper and moan and sigh leave your throat, savoring the way it always makes Ben jerk inside you. He’s still touching you—slow and gentle and leaving goosebumps whenever his hands ghost over a new area of skin—but the most he does is a groan against your collarbone that rolls through your body, or a buck of his hips when you clench around him.
“Real fucking good,” he grunts your name, voice muffled on your body. “So good, riding my cock all pretty and sweet. Making all those perfect fucking sounds for me, Christ-“
His hand on your hips has moved up, pulling you so close your heartbeats are in time and your teeth are brushing against his ear when you moan. You make a choked gasp when you roll your hips on a circle, feeling every twitch of him inside you, and every single word Ben says is making a hazed pleasure spread through your body, making you squirm above him.
“Let me fucking hear you,” he rubs your nipple between two careful, broad fingers, and you give him and loud, deseperate, pleading, moan. “Good girl, so fucking good.”
Please, Ben, more- You gasp when he switches his attention to your other breast, and Ben chuckles.
“You like that, Sunshine? Like me inside you, like feeling how perfect you fit over me, how, fuck,” you’ve started to rock back and forth, and his hand drops from your tits to brush over your stomach, down to your clit. “You feel so fucking good, so good and fucking beautiful, I fucking love you, love how good you take me, how you say my fucking name-“
Ben-
“Just like that, fuck, you’re so fucking good, fucking, Christ, you need, fuck-“ 
Suddenly you're still, Ben’s hand moving around to press on your lower back, and realized you’d started to ride him again. Fast and rough, lost in his words and how he was saying your name like a prayer, how Ben is everything, you should give him everything-
“I told you we were going slow,” he mutters in your ear, and you can’t stop your breathless moan when he starts to fuck, up, into you, and his groan sending electricity through your body as you squeeze around him. “You didn’t fucking listen, brat, so now it’s my turn.”
He’d tricked you. The fucking asshole had known what all the praise would do to you—it was like he’d studied just what say to wreck you with only his words—and had baited you into it. Called you good girl and pretty and said it in that way that echoed in your ribs like a drum, that made you crave more, to make you move faster on him. You know Ben, you can feel how smug and prideful he is, how the glow is being hounded by a cocky, massive sense of triumph. He’s grinning against your shoulder, and you’re going to give him hell for it.
Later. You’ll shove his chest and slap his arm later.
Right now you can’t really dwell on how much of a dickhead he is, because he’s holding you tight against his body and splitting you open on his cock. It’s so slow, he’s set and unrelenting pace of torture when he knocks against the deepest part of you, rolls his hips, and pulls almost fully out before driving back up in a lazy, unhurried, and careful thrust.
You’re going to kill him. You make empty threats like this all the time, but this one you mean. He’s such a smug bastard, and this feels so fucking good, and you’re so full, he’s holding your with such care and love and your name is falling from his lips like it’s holy, but you’re going to kill him. He’s dragged you right to the edge, but won’t just push you over it.
“Benjamin,” you hiss, the needy and high tone of your voice not selling how genuine close you are to punching me. “I need you to go faster, I’m so close-“
“I want to fucking feel you,” he grunts your name, and you shake your head and tug at his hair. “You feel so good, you just need to wait. Patience is a virtue, beautiful, you just have to hold on and wait.”
You whine, and his hand moves back to trace around your clit, but never right over it. “Ben, please-“
“Almost,” he mutters, running his thumb over you for a split second, making your whole body shiver. “So good. I fucking love you, Sunshine, want you to cum with me.”
“Please-“
Ben’s last thrust, powerful and rough as he pinches your clit, sends your orgasm crashing through you like a wave. He’d pulled a little further out, sucking on your neck as you shake in his arms, and you can feel his cum dribble out of you, running down your thighs. As your moans and curses fall into slow breaths and whimpers, Ben leaves gentle, reverent kisses up your jaw and across your check. Your head tilts down on instinct to catch his mouth, and he hums as your tongue runs over his lips.
You’re caged against Ben’s body, his arms flexing around you as he holds you, and you’ve never felt safer. This is where you belong. All your blood pouring out your body with love, and Ben’s own love so demandingly devout it makes you rest against him without any fear. Only love.
You love Ben, he loves you, and he’s where you belong.
——————
Ben was pretty sure that, at Vought Tower with Butcher and Maeve and Homelander and Annie, he’d actually just fucking died. Someone had figured out how to kill him, an awful misjudgment or error had been made, and he’d ended up in heaven. Or some sort of fucking purgatory, testing him to see if he’d be worthy. If Ben would stand at Her side, wait for her, do what she told him and only sometimes bitch about it. Love Her like she fucking deserved. Earn paradise, prove that he wasn’t a disgraceful, undeserving piece of shit, prove that—if this was heaven—he’d tend to it and care for it and worship it for the rest of his goddamn life.
Of all the possible options for why She loved him, it was the made the most fucking sense. Everything else, in comparison, seemed pretty fucking stupid. This was heaven. She loved Ben, he’d gotten to hear her say it, gotten to fucking feel her around him, and he hadn’t died at Vought she’d certainly fucking killed him there. Squeezing him, moaning his name and scratching his back and Her heart racing in her chest from what Ben did to her, loving Ben and letting him feel it.
It had hit him again. Buried deep inside Her, that high, infinite feeling had crashed through his body, and he’d almost fucking lost it. It had been Her love, for fucking Ben, everywhere around him and making the whole world better.
He’d almost cum just from that alone. He’d never stop being in awe of Her for a whole lot of goddamn reasons, and being able to just fucking live like that was now one of them.
Ben had, in a truly futile effort, tried to convince Her to just stay in bed for the whole goddamn day. The team could take care of it. This might be their problem, but they deserved at least one fucking break. One day for Ben to see if there were in fact limits to their supe stamina, if She’d look just as perfect as she came when she was riding him. Pressed against the wall. Bent over the couch or sitting in a chair, slammed against the floor or squirming against him in the shower or bent over a table-
It hadn’t worked. He’d been very descriptive of all his ideas, very open to suggestions as well, but after many minutes of Her shooting down all his arguments with good fucking points and smart fucking words, she’d crawled away from him, rolling off the bed, and he’d had to follow her into the bathroom for his promised shower.
He’d moved around Her, turning on the water, and she’d glared up at him.
“We’re already going to be late, Benjamin-“
“And who do you have to blame for that, Sunshine?” He’d grinned at Her, and she’d wrinkled her nose at him.
“You’re the one who hid my phone under the pillow,” She’d snapped, crossing her arms and pushing her pretty tits up to fucking taunt him. “That’s sabotage, you cunt. You’re not allowed in my shower.”
“Our shower-“
“Shut the fuck up, Pretty Boy.” She’d pushed his arm lightly, and Ben hadn’t even swayed. “If I let you in here, you’ll just try to fuck me and we’ll be even more late.”
Ben shrugged. He would do that. He’d been planning to do exactly that, but he’d also be damned if he was ashamed for wanting to show Her how much he loved her at any given opportunity. “I will, but you can just fucking tell me no. I’ll stop, and we can have a boring, sex-free shower.”
She’d flushed. “No. Stay out here.”
He’d grinned. She was almost pouting at him, but had stopped trying to shove him away, and her pretty eyes were blown out. “You want me to fuck you in the shower-“
“Fuck you-“
“I know,” his voice had been gleeful, his smile almost straining his face. “You never have a problem telling me. You don’t fucking want to tell me no.”
“Shut up-“
“Here’s the deal, beautiful.” He’d leaned over Her, watching her swallow and smirking at the slack, thirsty expression on her face. “I won’t try to fuck you. Won’t even damn mention it, because I’m a fucking gentleman and I love you. But I get to shower with you, and I’m putting an offer of fucking you on the table. Say the word and I’ll do whatever the fuck you want. But you have to start it. Clear?”
She’d nodded, and let Ben herd her into the steam.
He’d kept his hands to himself. Ben had only thought about how he wanted to push her into the wall and crack the tiles—in a way that he was pretty sure she couldn’t hear—and even tried to stop his semi-hard dick from brushing against her.
Then he’d—fucking innocently—reached over Her to grab his shampoo, and she’d snatched his hand out of the air and brought it down to her center, grinding back into him and will whining pleas.
He’d have been fucking insane to say no. To not rub and flick and play with her perfect fucking pussy until she came, shaking on his hand with her head thrown back against his chest. Ben would’ve had to have lost his goddamn mind.
So now they were twenty minutes late to the meeting. Ben’s hand was folded in Hers, and she was pulling him down the hallway with long, clipped steps that made him want to pick Her up and fuck her.
I love you-
Shut your fucking mouth, Benjamin. You loving me is what made us late in the first place.
He snorted. My mouth is shut, brat.
Shut it more, cunt.
Right before She could push through the dining hall doors, Ben spun her around into his chest, and cupped her face with a light hand. “Let’s go home.”
“We are home.” She smiled at him, hands curling in his shirt, and Ben wasn’t capable of arguing with that foolproof logical when she was so stupid fucking beautiful. “Can you keep it in your pants for the meeting?”
“No.”
“Benjamin-“
He rolled his eyes, and pressed one gentle, soft kiss onto her lips. “Whatever,” he muttered against her, and she let out a breathless sound that was going to give him a fucking seizure from want. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
It was like a fucking damn had broken inside him. Ben couldn’t fucking stop telling Her that he loved her. Even as he slung an arm over her shoulder and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, he wanted to scream it for the whole fucking building to hear. She needed to know, to never fucking forget, and he needed to keep her right fucking there all the time. At his side, leaning into him, squeezing his hand around Her as they entered the dining hall.
Since Mallory wasn’t in attendance, the most shit they got for the late arrival with a few glares and several sighs. They dropped onto the bench, and Ben heard Her heartbeat pick up as the team gaped at them. They looked fucking normal, as far as Ben knew. They’d washed off all the dried cum, put on clothing that wasn’t torn, their hair wasn’t really that fucking out of place. It couldn’t be how they were sitting, because they always sat like this. With Her pressed into his side, leaning her weight into his body, and his body half over hers.
But everyone’s heart was a little faster than normal. And none of them were just fucking speaking. Ben was about to open his mouth and demand some fucking answer, but Butcher broke the silence before he could.
“How very fuckin nice of you two cunts to finally join us,” he drawled, glaring between Her and Ben. “First skippin dinner, then almost playin hooky on the bloody meetin? You got a more rebellious streak than I thought, Love-“
“We were fucking busy,” She snapped, matching Butcher’s glare with one twice as violent. Christ, She was fucking perfect. “Our whole lives don’t revolve around you, Butcher. We’re allowed to miss dinner.”
“And the meeting?” MM muttered, and Her glare turned to him as he raised his hands up. “It’s not out of character, but the Singer shit was your idea. We weren’t able to start without you motherfuckers here.”
“And you ain’t got lives outside of this,” Butcher added with a scoff. “So unless you’re running a secret fuckin drug ring, in which case I’d like in, you shoulda bloody been here.”
 She sighed. “It’s none of your business, Butcher.“
“What, were you bloody twats fuckin all night-“
“Yes.” Ben grunted, glowering at Butcher. “Like she said, our fucking business.”
The whole room fell into silence, and Her voice rang in Ben’s ears.
What the fuck, Benjamin.
Sorry, his voice sounded insincere in his fucking brain, because he didn’t fucking mean it in the slightest. This shouldn’t be a fucking secret. People should know that Ben was fucking Her, that they fucking loved each other, and that not a single fucking force in the universe would take them away from each other.
She wasn’t that fucking angry, anyway, because all she did was slap his leg under the table, wrinkling her nose in a way that told Ben they both knew he’d probably do that again, and turn to watch the amusingly varied expressions of shock on their teams faces. 
Hughie—with a red fucking face and stuttered words—spoke first. “Um, last night? This last night?” 
“And this morning,” Ben winked at him, and She sighed, half burying her face in his chest. “I got good fucking stamina, Hughie, you need some tips I’d be happy to help-“ 
Her hand shot up to cover his mouth, and when Ben looked down she was giving him a flat look. Do not give Hughie sex tips, please.
You know how fucking good I am, would be damn cruel to deprive the world of what’s yours-
She flushed, but Her glare didn’t waver. Yeah, you’re a real Samaritan, Pretty Boy. And Hughie coughed.
“Um, was this, I guess a new thing? Like the first time-“
Ben scowled. “We haven’t been fucking lying to you pussies about not fucking-“
“It was,” She elbowed Ben in the gut, don’t be mean, and frowned at Hughie. “But I don’t know why that’s important-“
“Sorry, I’m just trying to, uh, put this shit together, I guess.” Hughie swallowed, the rest of the team watching them with a weird fucking intensity. “I, uh, what happened-“
“We fucked, Hughie.” Ben scowled. “It is not my goddamn job to explain fucking to you-“
“No,” Hughie’s heart was going to pound out of his chest like a damn cartoon. “I mean, I know what fucking is. It’s just kind of, uh, sudden? I’m wondering what changed-“ 
“She told me she loves me,” Ben didn’t bother to hide the smug pride in his voice, or the puff of his chest, and She’d seemingly completely given up on intervening in the conversation. Her face was fully squished against him, and Ben rubbed small circles on her shoulder as he smirked at Hughie. “And I said it back. And we fucked.”
“You just, um, went right into fucking, or-“
“I fingered her first,” Ben shrugged, and She sighed into him. “And then she sucked my cock, and-“
“Hughie-“ MM’s words were a low warning. “That’s all you should fucking need, I do not want a play by play of their sex-“
Her head peaked up, leaning around Ben to frown at MM. “What do you mean, what he should need?” Her gaze turned to Hughie, and the kid flinched. “Hughie. Why do you need to know that stuff.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled, giving Her an apologetic grimace before running a hand over his face and looking around the table. “What day is it?” 
“June 9th,” Annie’s answer was quick, and she was watching Hughie carefully. “Little over three months.”
She looked up at Ben with a frown as Hughie started to frown to himself, narrowing his eyes at the air.
What are they talking about?
Fuck if I know, Ben shrugged, looking back at Hughie. I can make him tell us.
I’ll keep that in mind, but for now no torture-
Hughie’s eyes refocused and he sighed. “That’s twenty-five to MM for having three and half months on sex, twenty to Annie for exactly three on feelings, and twenty-five to Kimiko for sex immediately after feelings.”
As everyone groaned and began to pull out wallets, Annie frowned.
“Why do I only get twenty-“
Hughie scratched the back of his neck, giving Annie a sheepish look. “You said he’d confess feelings first, but she did, so you don’t, uh, get the bonus. And we put more on the order and distance-“
At Ben’s side, She was gaping around the table with an indigent glare. “Were you guys betting on us-“ 
“Sorry,” MM said Her name with a shrug. “But we all got tired of your fucking pining shit, needed to do something with it.”
“You did not need to-“
“You forgot to ask about the positions, Petite Hughie,” The French Prick interrupted Her with a frown, and Hughie sighed.
“We vetoed that one, remember? Nobody bet on it-“
“Nah, Lad, I got fifty riding on who was on top.” Butcher wiggled his eyebrows at Her and Ben. “Think you twats can say the right shit and make Frenchie pay me what he fuckin owes?”
“Butcher,” She snapped, squeezing Ben’s leg in a silent order to keep quiet. “I am not telling you who was on top-“
“Was Soldier Boy, wasn’t it?” Her face flushed, and Butcher gave The French Prick triumphant smirk. “Fuckin told you, Frenchie-“
“She did not say it, I will not pay-“
“You bloody owe me, Mate, don’t make me fucking take it-“
“Holy fuck,” she mumbled, giving Ben an eye roll, idiots, and ignoring his snort as she raised Her voice. “Frenchie, pay him.”
“Non, you must say it-“
“He was on top!” She snapped, and Ben didn’t miss the way her thighs squeezed until the table, where only he could see. “Pay Butcher, and if either of you ever bring this up again, I’ll fucking kill you. Now can we please just do our jobs?” 
“Well,” Butcher began, slowly counting the money Frenchie had passed him. “Ain’t that much to update you lot on. Singer’s still got his fuckin head up his ass, blockin us from makin any progress on the V, so we’ve found ourself in a bit of a fuckin stalemate until the president gets off his ass.”
She frowned. “Then why was this so urgent-“
“Because, Love,” Butcher’s sharp gaze rose up, scowling between Her and Ben. “I got some really fuckin interesting news from Mallory yesterday morning, about how Stan Edgar called her sayin Soldier Boy and the Anomaly still ain’t given an answer to his offer. And I’m real fuckin curious what he could be talkin about.”
Ben tensed, pulling Her closer into him, and glared at Butcher as She answered.
“Edgar kind of,” She sighed, fingers tapping on Ben’s knee. “He called us. And, um, asked us to visit him.”
“Why the hell would he want you two to visit him,” MM frowned. “He and Soldier Boy aren’t exactly on good fucking terms, and he’s only met you,” he gave Her a small nod. “Once.”
She glanced up at Ben. Can I tell them? About your IOU?
He didn’t want to tell them—mostly because they’d all fucking yell at him, and he couldn’t kiss them to make them shut up—but after failing think of a single good reason to say no, he shrugged. If you fucking need to, fine.
She nodded, and took a deep breath as she turned back to the team. “I need everyone to promise not to lose their shit, and that they’ll let me finish talking before they jump in.”
“I ain’t makin no fuckin promises-“
“Butcher,” Annie snapped, glaring over Hughie’s still-red face. “Just shut up.”
Butcher scowled, but didn’t say anything more, and Annie gave Her an encouraging nod to continue.
“Okay.” She sighed. “First of all, I’ve already yelled at Ben a lot for this, so you guys don’t have to. It was stupid, and reckless, and lacked any critical thinking skill or obvious foresight-“
You better be fucking going somewhere-
“But,” She kicked Ben’s shin, ignoring his glare. “We were desperate, and I understand why he did it. Even if it was fucking dumb.”
MM frowned. “Are you going to keep vamping for a thousand fucking years, or tell us what this motherfucker did-“
“Ben made a deal with Stan Edgar, and now we,” She gestured between Ben and herself. “Owe him.”
She tensed at Ben’s side as everyone stared at them—mostly Ben, and he probably needed to pretend he actually gave a fuck about the consequence of the IOU, but also She was curled into him and happy and safe so Ben decided he could be fucked—and they waited for the bitching to begin.
“And,” MM ran a hand over his face, shaking his head. “And you didn’t think that would be important fucking information to share with us?”
“No.” She mumbled. “I mean, I know I should’ve, but everyone was still at each other’s throat about Ben and I, and I didn’t want to add fuel to the fire.”
“This ain’t about your bloody relationship drama, Love, this could fuck our asses raw with Soldier Boy’s dumb fuckin-“
“It wasn’t dumb,” She snapped, and Butcher was smart enough to shut up under her glare. It was likely more of a survival instinct, because Ben had been on the receiving end of that specific glare—where She looked like she already had a plan to kill you, there was nothing you could do to prevent it, and your body wouldn’t ever be found—and even he had been a little worried. Less worried than Butcher, because he wasn’t a fucking pussy and that glare was also fucking hot on Her, with curled lips and sharp eyes and Christ she was pretty, but worried all the same. Fuck, even Her voice was hot, firm and venomous. “And I didn’t hide it because of us,” She gestured between herself and Ben, and he needed to get it the fuck together and pay attention to thoughts that weren’t if I fucked Her on the table, how annoying would everyone be about it. “I hid it because I don’t think you can honestly tell me that, if I had told you, you wouldn’t have tried to kill us both.”
“I ain’t able to kill you, I’ve fuckin looked into it-“
“I know that,” She cut off Butcher’s muttering with a scowl. “But my point is that you didn’t trust us. This isn’t something I could share when you didn’t trust us. Got it? Can we talk about the actual issue on the table?”
Butcher rolled his eyes, but nodded.
“Thank you.” She turned back to the rest of the team, frowning into the air as she ran through her thoughts aloud. “Edgar says he has the favor picked out, but wants Ben and I to visit him. We don’t know why I need to be there yet, but we do know that he’ll be ‘in a better mood’ if I do. Whatever that means.”
“And if you do not visit him?” The French Prick watched Her carefully. “Will there be, ah, alternative actions?”
“I don’t know,” She pulled her lips between her teeth, chewing them with such force Ben was worried she’d break skin. “He’s not asking us to bring him anything. Just to keep him company, have lunch with him. He already knows what he wants Ben to do, and he said he’s willing to just cash in the IOU over the phone and that’ll be it. But he still wants us to visit.”
“It might be a, like a trap?” Hughie mumbled, looking around the table with an anxious face. “I mean, Edgar’s never been trustworthy, and he’s kind of the fucking worst-“ 
She shook her head. “I don’t think it’s a trap. Edgar wouldn’t realign himself with Homelander, and he’s too smart to let Sage pull his strings. I,” She took a long breath. “I want to go. Edgar might be cryptic and an annoying fucking dickhead, but he doesn’t play games that are unwinnable. He’s got some sort of endgame, and I think we should see what it is.”
“No.” Ben didn’t wait for the rest of the team to chime in with their stupid fucking opinions. There wasn’t a single fucking chance he was taking Her out of the compound, upstate, in goddamn public—where Homelander could find Her—for a lunch with Stan Edgar. “I’ll deal with this my goddamn self, we’re not entertaining Edgar’s fucking shit.”
“Ben-“
“I’m with Soldier Boy on this.” MM interjected, and Her eyes widened. “Edgar’s a slippery fucking bastard. No telling what the hell he wants from you, and it’s real goddamn suspicious he’s making it an option. It feels like a fucking trap.” 
“It would be a stupid trap,” She crossed her arms, glaring around the table. “It’s way too obvious. And it’s not like we’re helpless if he does try to pull something-“
“But we can’t risk it right now.” Annie sighed, giving Her a close-lipped smile. “I mean, the IOU will be cashed in no matter what, right? Why should we play Edgar’s game when he’s already gotten what he wants?”
Butcher scoffed. “And that, Starlight, is why you never fuckin win on poker nights. Sometimes you gotta take the gamble, bloody live a little and let it pay off. I think the cunts should go, I’m all fuckin in on it.”
“Of course you would be, you asshole-“
“Kimiko and I are also on team go.” The French Prick gave Annie an apologetic look as he cut her off. “Kimiko says that she trusts the judgment of Madame,” the French Prick nodded at Her, and Ben realized he’d fully dropped saying either Anomaly or her name. He could fucking appreciate that, even if Frenchie was making to dogshit fucking choice of siding with Her dumb as fuck plan. “And I trust the judgment of Kimiko.” 
She nodded, and all eyes turned to Hughie.
“I, uh, why is everyone-“
“You’re the last fucking vote, Kid.” MM shrugged. “Yay or nay on Edgar, all on you.”
“Do not let the pressure get to your head, petite Hughie.” Frenchie added, and Hughie swallowed. “I am sure neither will kill you if you do not vote their way.”
She might not. She was kind like that. Ben wasn’t.
Hughie must have known that Ben’s glare wasn’t a fucking empty threat, because he mumbled, “It’s, um, probably not worth it. Nay, I guess.”
Ben gave Her a smug grin, I fucking win, and she completely ignored him.
“Edgar’s literally locked up, he’s not a threat right now-“
MM said Her name flatly. “You know just as well as the rest of us that Edgar’s always a fucking threat. You’re still being hunted by Vought, there’s no way it’s worth taking such a goddamn risk for his,” MM pointed a sharp finger at Ben, and didn’t get it snapped off only because they were on the same side of this shit. “Stupid choices. It’s too far a fucking drive, and we can’t know what the hell Edgar’s got waiting for you. You’re outvoted on this. Back down.”
“Technically I’m not, we’re tied-“ 
“A stalemate is a no.” MM grunted with a shrug. “And we’re not flipping. That’s it.”
She narrowed her eyes, and Ben could hear Her brain moving.
You lost, Sunshine. It happens to all of us, and now you know how I feel all the goddamn time-
I did not lose.
Yes, you did. An don’t say something fucking insane to try and get around it-
Shut the fuck up. “What if Edgar comes to us?” She didn’t even look at Ben’s glower, looking around the table. “Home field advantage, no way for him to set something up.”
“We ain’t lettin that cunt in the house,” Butcher grunted. “I’m still on your side, Love, but we’re on strict fuckin lockdown. Not a chance in bloody hell we’ll convince Mallory to give Edgar a day pass.”
“First of all, this isn’t a house,” She shrugged, finger drumming against Ben’s leg as she frowned. “But we could bring him to a house.”
Hughie blinked. “None of us have a house-“
“But the CIA does,” She grinned. “And it’s fucking impenetrable.”
“Oh, shit.” Hughie’s eyes widened. “The safe house.”
She nodded. “Where Edgar’s family is. He won’t risk Neuman, or Zoe. We can meet him there, no risk, and hear what he wants.”
“That’s,” Annie sighed. “Yeah, okay. I’ll switch my vote.”
She bumped Ben’s shoulder, a smug fucking smirk on her pretty face. Suck on that, Benjamin. Five to three, I win.
He scowled. Brat.
You love it.
He did. And, fuck him, Ben couldn’t figure out a single good argument to flip Annie back. It was a genius fucking idea. It was safe, they’d be giving Edgar extra by letting him see Neuman, and they’d get whatever fucking generosity the pussy had promised them. And when MM and Hughie agreed to Her idea—MM making it clear that it was only on the terms of the safe house he was siding with Her—Ben gave up. She was too fucking smart, and he was too fucking stupidly in love with Her and her happy, pleased smile to keep arguing. Especially not when, as Butcher grunted they’d need four day and everyone started to disperse, Ben had several fucking plans to drag Her home and win his own game. To tease and touch and fuck Her until she was a wet, fucked out mess beneath him, take advantage of how Her heart picked up every time he called her my love, and maybe he’d get Her to squirt again-
“Frenchie?”
Ben blinked at Her nervous voice, and realized it was just them, Frenchie, and Kimiko left in the dining hall. She was leaning over the table, tilting her head at Frenchie as she spoke slow, measured words.
“You, um, you know a little about how my powers work, right? The empathy specifically?”
“I, ah,” Frenchie glanced at Ben with nervous fucking pussy words. “I do, oui. But I am not sure-“
“He knows about the suppressant,” She said with a sigh. “I’m not taking it anymore, by the way, I can give the rest back-“ 
“Non, they are yours. A gift.” Frenchie frowned. “Why do you bring up your empathy if not for the pills?”
“I have,” She swallowed, glancing up at Ben. “We have a few questions about it.” 
Who the fuck is we, Sunshine. 
You and I. She shot him a quick glare. He might know what the whole mind reading shit is, Pretty Boy. Don’t be an ass.
Ben rolled his eyes, but turned his glare to Frenchie’s confused face.
“What questions would you like answered, Madame?”
“You said my empathy is my limbic system going beyond my own self.” She frowned. “Right?”
“Oui,” Frenchie nodded, looking Her up and down. “The V, ah, causes you to connect your brain with others. Ties their emotions in with your own.”
Ben didn’t understand what the fuck Frenchie was talking about, but She seemed satisfied with that weird answer, and continued. “But it’s temporary, not a long term bond.”
Frenchie blinked at Her. “It should be. Your brain is still your own, it would be fucking exhausting for you if it was not. Why do you-”
“I think I did something to Ben.” She mumbled, staring at the table, and he scoffed.
Shut the fuck up, Sunshine, it’s not like this is torture for me. Don’t get all fucking sad about it-
But I- 
“We can read each other’s damn minds,” Ben said aloud, because She wasn’t allowed to blame herself for this, so he wouldn’t entertain any protests about it. “And you’re going to tell us why.” 
“Please.” She added, and Ben rolled his eyes. “And I think it’s something about the empathy because I can feel him. He’s just kind of in me-“ 
“He does not look to be in you right now-“
Kimiko whacked Frenchie’s arm, and sighed something that made him frown and turn back to Her.
“Are you speaking in metaphor?”
“No, but I’m also not talking about his dick, Frenchie.” She sighed. “I can feel him when he’s not touching me. Or anywhere near me, really. It’s kind of like just a thing in my chest that is Ben. It’s hard to explain, but I know it’s him. And it vanished with the suppressant, so I think it’s related to the empathy.”
Later, Ben would have to ask Her what the fuck she meant by it was him. What he felt like, why She was so goddamn certain of it. But Frenchie was nodding slowly, looking between them, so Ben had to pay attention. 
“And you, ah,” Frenchie paused, glancing at Kimiko before turning back to Her. “Can you hear our thoughts?”
“No. And it’s not hearing his thoughts, it’s more selective than that-“
“Selective my balls,” Ben muttered, and She wrinkled her nose at him.
Fuck off, Pretty Boy. We’re still learning how to use it, it’s going to be touch and go. “It is selective, he’s just a dramatic fucking man child.” Ben scowled, but let Her continue. He kind of wanted some damn answers as well. “It’s like we’re talking to each other, but in our heads.” 
Kimiko signed something, and She shook her head. 
“No, not like the,” She sighed. “Heart eyes. That’s just reading expressions, and I can do it with my family as well. This is like some sort of mental bond, but I don’t know why we have it.” 
Frenchie titled his head at Her. “Did it begin after you fucked?” 
“Um,” She flushed, heart fluttering. “No. The Ben Thing in me was kind of in and out for a while, then got cemented at the Believe Expo, when we met in the bathroom.” 
“And you did not fuck in the bathroom?” 
“No-“ 
“I fingered you,” Ben supplied, and gave Her exasperated glare a wink. “And ate you out.” He glanced at Frenchie. “Does that shit count.”
Frenchie sighed. “It does. Can you, Soldier Boy, feel her?”
Ben frowned. “Fucking once and a while, yeah.”
“Really?” She blinked up at him. “When?”
“When you escaped,” he shrugged. “When you got drunk. When I fucked you-“
“And you didn’t tell me-“ 
“I only just fucked you, and how the fuck was I supposed to know it was you-“
“I don’t know, I figured it out myself-“
“After fucking months-“
Frenchie coughed, and they both turned to glare at him.
“I, ah, you may continue, but I have a theory for what has happened.”
“Fucking wait-“
She covered Ben’s mouth, and nodded to Frenchie. “What is it?”
“You,” Frenchie nodded at Her, saying Her name carefully. “Have, hypothetically, planted yourself in Soldier Boy.”
Ben dragged Her hand away from him with a firm, careful grip. “What the fuck are you talking about.”
“As her powers have grown, and you two developed a, ah, connection, it may have led to her brain, the V of it, reaching into your brain and not removing itself, even after contact had ended.”
“But that doesn’t explain the mind reading.“ She frowned, and Ben smirked.
You called it mind reading. 
Fuck you, Benjamin-
“It is just an idea,” Frenchie shrugged. “But if your empathy felt safe within the environment of Soldier Boy’s body, it might have been capable of tying into him. Making you a physical part of him, perhaps deep enough for thoughts to be traded. And the piece of him within you is the piece of your brain within him, sending you signals of his own mind and body.” 
“If it’s my brain putting my empathy in Ben,” She said carefully. “Is it something I have to worry about happening again?” 
Frenchie shook his head. “It is very unlikely. Just once is an astronomical fucking shock, and you would have to recreate the exact events for it to even possibly happen again.” 
Ben scowled. “The fuck you mean a shock-“
“I mean it is batshit that her literal fucking brain could grow within you. It required much physical contact, a, ah, profound emotional connection, and for your own body to not view her as a parasite and terminate her within you.”
She tilted Her head. “Is it because we have the same V? Like a biological thing?”
“It may have helped,” Frenchie sighed. “But I cannot truly tell without tests.”
Do you want to test it? She glanced up at Ben, scanning his face. I mean, I don’t really think it matters-
It fucking doesn’t. And he is not damn poking us with needles just give us the exact same fucking answer. Ben glared at Frenchie. “Her brain is in me? That's it?”
Frenchie swallowed. “Oui, I imagine so.”
Ben nodded. Got all the shit you want?
I guess. Not much else I can ask. She gave Frenchie a smile. “Thank you, that helps.”
“Would you want any of the tests-“
“Fuck no,” Ben snapped, and started to stand, pulling Her with him. “No science shit.”
She glared at him, and turned back to Frenchie. Ben didn’t actually pay attention what She was saying—probably just fucking goodbyes or some sentimental shit—because he was just staring at Her. He kept staring at Her, as they left the dining hall and returned to their apartment.
She was fucking perfect. He loved Her—he’d never stop saying it, nobody could make him stop fucking saying it—and She was his whole life. She loved him, and now Ben got to give Her everything. They’d kill Homelander, and move to Rome, and get married. He’d fuck Her forever, and care for Her the same way she did for him—staying at his side, defending him with words and plans and faith the same way he defended her with his hands and body and sheer fucking will—and that would be it. She’d be it. She was it. She was a fucking part of Ben, and he’d never fucking lose Her. She loved him, and she was never fucking wrong, and Ben would spend the rest of his life ensuring he was worthy of being central in Her orbit, that he was deserving of being part of Her.
He’d always make sure was worthy of keeping that part of Her in him safe. He’d tend to it and care for Her and love Her, he fucking swore on the world she loved so much, and this was it. They, together, were it.
End Note: They really did not last two weeks before they were fucking and shouting about how much they love each other. Two most unserious people.
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jollyhunter · 24 days ago
Text
24 Kinky Days with Dean x reader - Day 1.
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!reader
Warnings: NSFW - MDNI! - includes explicit sexual content and sex toys, soft!dom Dean. It's a kinky writing challenge, so expect anything at this point, (nothing freaky, don't worry) but it's a surprise calendar so I won't spoil it! Also, English is not my native language
Advent calendar includes: headcanons, snippets, one shots, imagines, blurbs etc.
Words: 2,380
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A/N: If you want to be tagged for the next parts, just let me know. And feedback is welcome!! Enjoy! 🦊
⚝‿︵‿୨♡ ⚝ ♡୧‿︵‿⚝
1st Dec. - Sunshine
“Sunshine?” You repeat the unexpected nickname with a little grin while you sit down on the edge of the motels bed. You were used to sweetheart, darling, love or even baby, but sunshine? “That’s a new one…” you remark with a teasing lift of your eyebrow, your eyes darting from his, back down to the gift on your lap.
“I thought it suited you.” He explains with an expression which was almost too innocent for him. Clearly he is trying his best to hide his knowing smile, but his excited voice betrays him. “Now open it, sunshine.”
“Uh-huh”, Your finger tugs at the unconventional gift paper, which consisted of nothing but a roll of toilet paper that hung loosely around the small package. “Interesting wrapping paper you picked there…” You comment with a wry smile. This was so typical Dean.
He chuckles at your remark, “What can I say? I’m a fan of practical gift wrapping,” he says with a cocky smirk, taking a seat next to you, “It’s eco-friendly.” The mattress dipped down from his weight and your shoulders bumped against each other. He makes a great effort to play it cool, but the slight friction was enough for you to notice the excitement and arousal which was radiating off of him. This just made you wonder even more; What the hell is that sly bastard up to this time?
Dean watches as you carefully unwrap the package, clearly intrigued by what he had given you. “But I promise, the content’s worth the toilet paper sacrifice,” he adds with a playful smirk. There it was again, that all too familiar glint in his green eyes. That flash of ‘oh baby if only you knew’.
At last, you rip the box open, your eyes peering down to be met with… Oh dear lord. Your eyes widen and Dean could see a million thoughts flicker across your face at the moment of realization. This is exactly the reaction he had hoped for. He has to bite the inside of his cheeks to keep a straight face – but fails miserably.
“You stick it where the sun don’t shine… sunshi-”
“I know where it goes.” you cut him short in a sputter, your mind still trying to catch up with this... this gift, “I just- I’ve never-…”
“- done it before. I know,” he finishes for you, his voice a mixture of teasing and reassuring, “Remember that talk we had? About tryin’ new things.” He leans over, his shoulders brushing against your chest as he reaches into the box. “You like it?”, he asks, feigning innocence. He takes the toy out of the box to trace a finger lightly over the small, jewel-adorned plug.
“I-...I- uh-,” You start, but your eyes keep drifting down to the toy in his hand, your mind racing – damnit, you were usually confident and experienced when it came down to these things… but, to be honest, kinky stuff really hasn’t made it into your bedroom so far. But trying these things with Dean for the first time? You’d be damned for missing out on that. And hey, don't knock it till you try it, right?
“Yeh, I like it,” you finally say, trying to muster some of your usual confidence, “I mean… I did say I wanna spice it up...”
That answer hit jackpot in Dean’s expression. He bites his bottom lip, trying to contain his eagerness, yet again, failing miserably. “Well, don’t keep me waitin’,” he teases, his voice just a tad bit lower than usual. You glance down at the toy and back up at him, unsure how to approach this exactly.
Noticing your lost expression, Dean gently takes your hand and leads you to stand up in front of him, him still seated on the edge of the bed. “Strip.” His tone has an authoritative edge to it now, though his eyes remain soft, almost tender as he tries to guide you.
You feel a little shiver run down your spine; that damn voice could have made your knees buckle any time. Nodding slightly, you slowly begin to undress, stripping off layer after layer of clothing until you stand completely naked before him. Dean takes a moment to admire your body, his eyes roaming over every part of you. As his gaze lands on your hips, he speaks again, his voice a low growl. “Now turn around, sweetheart.” He places his hands on your hips, his fingers trailing over your skin, sending a row of shivers through your body. Once you face away from him, you involuntarily bite your lower lip in anticipation. With the toy in his grasp, he speaks again, his voice barely above a whisper. “Get on your hands and knees, sunshine.” You swallow thickly. But again, you obey his command without question and you drop down onto your hands and knees on the floor in front of the bed. By now you can feel the excitement and lust raise more with each of your quickened breaths. And Dean can almost smell your arousal as he has to bite back a groan from it, his bulge growing bigger. He pushes off the bed and places a hand between your shoulder blades, pushing you slightly forward, forcing you to arch your back slightly. He runs his fingertips down your spine, eliciting another small shiver from you. Out of your sight, but still not going unnoticed by your ears, you hear him lick the bottom of his lips at the sight while he could feel all of his blood go south. He leans in close to you, his lips just barely brushing against your ear. “You’re so damn beautiful.”
A small whimper leaves your lips at the praise and the feeling of his firm hands on your bare skin are already enough to make you dripping wet. You hear Dean move behind you, reaching for the lube on the bedside table and what you assume, coating the toy with it. He then gently leans against your back, the cold buckle of his belt and the evidence of his arousal pressing against your bare skin. You bite back a groan from it, silently wishing nothing more but for him to unbuckle those damn pants already. But you know, you’d have to be patient for now, so you keep your needy sounds back as well as you can. At least until you gasp loudly when you suddenly feel the cool, metallic surface make contact with the warm skin of your buttocks. “Relax, baby,” he murmurs, his free hand soothingly massaging the small of your back. “I’ll be gentle.” His voice is even deeper now, filled with lust. You feel his hands continue their exploration, running over your curves and every dip, his calloused fingers caressing you like you are a work of art he wants to savour. His hands send sparks up your spine and you find yourself shudder and your breath hitch whenever his fingers brush across your most sensitive spots. “Now, this might feel a lil’ odd at first,” you hear him whisper, his lips hovering over the back of your neck as you feel his warm breath tingle your skin and the fabric of his flannel rest against your back. “Lemme know if it’s too much, ‘kay?”
“Yeah, I will,” you reassure him in a low mumble, not managing to hide the slight trepidation from your voice while your fingers idly searched the rug for something to dig your fingers into.
Dean feels you tense under his touch and he makes sure to keep his hands firm yet tender, his fingers tracing reassuringly over your skin. “Remember, just relax,” he repeats, his lips grazing your ear as he speaks. A shaky breath escapes your lips and you do your best to loosen up your muscles and melt into his strong hands which always give you a feeling of safety, no matter what you two did. And you two had done a lot of adventurous things so far.
“I’ve got you,” you hear him whisper against your ear again. And this time you could swear you even heard some vulnerability in his voice. You trust him, always, no doubt about that. But it’s moments like these, rare little moments of him giving you a glimpse of how damn much he really cares about you feeling safe and protected in his presence, that makes you eager to reassure him. Maybe even please him a little. You hum a soft “Mhm”, silently giving him the final go.
Then, he begins to slowly press the plug forward, his hand still resting on your back, steadying you. You feel the cool and wet tip sliding further inside, spreading you surprisingly well – but then a little sting makes you gasp from the unexpected feeling, which let your muscles tense up momentarily, before you feel his soothing hands again, and you relax under his touch.
“Shhh, ‘tis alright,” he coos softly, the plug inching inside you at the same time, “Good girl. You deserve a big treat.” Your legs tremble from the sensation and a low whimper leaves your lips – it’s not bad, but still very new and you were constantly fighting the urge to clench your buttocks around the unfamiliar object. When Dean finally stilled in his movement and the toy reached its end, you couldn’t hold back the shaky exhale which was close to a soft moan. Now that your body has adjusted to it, it feels… surprisingly exciting and pleasurable. And damnit, you want more now. You need more.
A sudden pleading whine hits Dean’s ears and his smirk widens into a cocky grin at the needy noise coming from your trembling form. “You want more, sunshine?”
“Yes...please,” you whimper instantly, your hands and knees shifting along the rug, in a desperate attempt to get some friction between your thighs. He groans – this time failing to hold it back in. The sight of you, all needy and exposed and you wearing that pretty jewel adorned-plug that’s twinkling in the low light of the motel room and fuck- he just noticed how wet you are. He briefly grazes his bottom lip with his teeth before he clenches his jaw to force down a swallow, his voice a low rumble under his breath, “Goddamn honey…”. Meanwhile his fingers run along the inside of your wet thighs, scooping up some of your juice like he wanted to make sure that none of it went to waste. He brings his fingertips up to his lips where he then licks them off with a deep groan.
And that just does it to make Dean give in.
Without giving you the chance to prepare, he goes back to your pussy and effortlessly pushes two fingers past your slick lips, drawing a deep moan from you as you feel a shudder go through your body. He keeps one hand on the small of your back, while his fingers pump inside you, relentless and eager to give you the release you deserve. “You were such a good girl,” he praises you, his fingers curling inside you to hit that sweet spot which makes you almost buckle. “Oh God-” you moan shakily, the sensation of his thick fingers filling you up on one side while the butt plug is spreading your other side, was almost too much.
“You can take it, come on,” he challenges you with a gravelly voice, his teeth grazing your neck as if to dare you to talk back. “‘M gonna make sure you get what you deserve and then some,” he whispers against your ear, the sound of it a threat as much as a promise. And then he starts scissoring his fingers while holding you in place with his other hand. You groan loudly, your fingers clutching the next thing they can reach - the damn toilet paper wrapping, which rip and crumple from your nails in an instant. Your hip‘s bucking involuntarily at the increased pressure and a row of guttural moans leave your throat. “F-fuck” you whine breathlessly, the feeling of being spread and stretched becoming almost bordering painful and yet oh so pleasurable as you feel the knot inside you tighten up more and more. The working of his fingers and the pressure in your butt get you close to the edge in record time as you just give in and let him do his magic. Your legs start to shake and if it wasn’t for his fingers dug into the flesh at your hip, you’d have keeled over by now for sure. Dean increases the speed, now his thumb flicking over your swollen bundle of nerves every time he pumps his fingers inside of you again.
“F-fuck, Dean, I- I’m- I’m comin’-” your voice breaks off when his fingers hit your g-spot again and you find yourself whimper into the rug, your nails clawing at the floor.
“That’s it-” he praises you again, now slowing down his pace but thrusting them as deep as he can while his arm slams against the plug, pressing it further in - and that‘s the last push it takes to tip you over the edge. You feel your legs give in as the knot finally bursts and the wave of ecstasy hits you, your walls clenching around his fingers and your body tensing up. Dean keeps you from falling forward, his fingers still going and his grip on your hip tightening while he’s murmuring words that go past your clouded mind. He lets you ride out your hight while your juice is soaking his entire arm. You moan out his name with a final shudder before he lets you collapse to the floor.
Dean looks down at your trembling form, all spent and limp. A satisfied grin spreads across his face while his tongue swipes over his glistening arm, savouring your sweetness and cleaning some of the mess. After a moment, he kneels down behind you, his hands caressing your butt where he pulls the plug gently out, putting it aside before his hands go back to soothingly stroke your arms and legs. He places a row of tender kisses on the back of your neck, his voice a low rumble, filled with affection and pride as he whispers against the nape of your neck. “Happy first advent, sunshine.”
EDIT: I revised some of it. My sleep-deprived brain had left out some parts which I just had to add / adjust.
⚝‿︵‿୨♡ ⚝ ♡୧‿︵‿⚝
Masterlist of opened windows:
1st Dec. - Sunshine 2nd Dec. - Spell Book 3rd Dec. - Lights Out 4th Dec. - Tickle 5th Dec. - Dirty UNO 6th Dec. - (TBA) 7th Dec. - Candlelight 8th Dec. - Hex Play 9th Dec. - Whip Stroke
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⚝‿︵‿୨♡ ⚝ ♡୧‿︵‿⚝
Tags: (thank you lovely sweeties, I hope you enjoyed it!)
@deaniemyboo @deansjacket @literallylexa
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dilf-rot · 4 months ago
Text
Nuisance
P2
MDNI 18+
Word Count: 1975
Tags: Wolverine x Reader, Logan Howlett x Reader, Mutant!Reader, Reader hates Logan, Logan doesn’t really care, Reader with a Vulva, GN except for the term “princess”, Hate sex, Agressive sex, dirty talk, P in V, fingering, oral, hickeys / biting, scratching 
AN: Written for an anon request <3
If you enjoy my work consider sending me a tip at https://ko-fi.com/rotwrites (Not required by any means, writing requests are still free!)
—---------------------------------------
After a particularly stressful mission, you and the others decided to throw a party. It was mostly you and Jean who put everything together, deciding how and if you should decorate, when it should be, etc. The two of you got along rather well, except you had a particular disagreement. She would say that Logan was on her list for the most attractive people at the mansion. You, however, could not stand him. 
His cocky attitude. His annoying comments during training. Sometimes even the way he stood bothered you.
Everyone had picked up on it rather quickly, including Logan, who was not exactly sure why you hated him, but didn’t really give a shit. He decided it would make his life easier if he pretended to hate you too.
The party was going rather well, nothing could go wrong by giving a bunch of stressed and lonely mutants unlimited (or mostly so) access to alcohol, party games, and the space to mingle while music blasted from someone’s borrowed speakers. 
“Hey Princess,” that voice you’d recognize anywhere. You turn around to see him, Logan, leaning against the wall, beer in hand. 
“Go fuck yourself,” You rolled your eyes and leant back against the wall. 
“Would if I could,” He flexed his hand, claws springing out from between his knuckles.
“Put those away, we’re in a public space you know.” You scoffed at him, he always seemed to want to show off at the worst of times. 
“Whatever.” He put his claws away, the blood from his knuckles dripping to the floor. Gross.
“What do you even want?”
“Just saying thanks for the party, is that so bad?” He shrugs, taking a sip from his beer.
“Why? It was Jean’s idea.” 
“That’s funny, she said it was yours.” You search the crowd and spot Jean talking to Scott in a corner. She returns your glance with a wave and a thumbs up. You curse under your breath. 
“Could I get you a drink?” He tips his beer towards you.
“Why?” You cross your arms, you already had a few earlier, but the buzz had worn off quickly. 
“Maybe it’ll make you a bit more pleasant,” He gestures towards the kitchen, “Come on, Doll.” 
You’re not sure why, but you follow him. Maybe because you have nothing better to do, or more so you don’t want to end up third-wheeling Jean. Or because everyone else is so preoccupied and you are always ending up on the outskirts. 
There’s way less people in the kitchen, just a handful sitting along the counter or bunched up at the table. Logan slides in front of the fridge, grabbing a beer and tossing it to you. 
“This isn’t gonna make me like you, you know that right?” You pop off the cap on the edge of the counter, the bubbles spilling over onto your hand. 
“That’s ok, you can tell me how much you hate me after we get out of here.”
“And why would I leave with you?” You ask between sips of the beer. It’s rather refreshing, though you’ve had better. 
“What else are you gonna do?” He gives you a smug look before heading out of the kitchen towards the stairs. 
Damnit. You curse yourself, every part of your brain telling you not to follow him, but you just couldn’t help it. And before you know it you're standing right outside his door, as he’s in the doorframe, you come back to yourself.
“I’m not coming into your room, Logan. I don’t know where you think this night is going, but you’re wrong.” He just smiles and walks further into his room, setting his beer down on his nightstand.
“Suit yourself, but you and I both know you were bored as hell down at the party.” He leans back against his head board. You hadn’t even realized he was wearing just a tank top and jeans until right now. 
“Do you know how much I hate those stupid tanks? Can you just cover yourself up for once?” 
“Why? My arms botherin’ you?” He flexes, and you avert your gaze to not get wrapped up in his preening.
“Yes. Your everything bothers me”
“Oh yeah?”
“I hate your attitude. How you think you're so hot, so cool. Always in the fucking way.” You drink from your beer. Leaning against his doorway. “Hate your stupid hair. And your smoking habit. Whole fucking mansion risks when you’re here.” 
He smiles, almost chuckling to himself. 
“I hate when you do that, too.” 
“Tell me more, Doll.”
“God fuck you. Do you even know any of our names or do you just make shit up so you don’t have to think too hard?” That one makes him actually laugh. The sound of it making your blood run hot. You could punch him right now and feel no remorse. In fact you just might. You slam the door behind you, stalking up to the side of the bed, putting your beer next to his and standing right in front of him. You reel back, “I hate your stupid laugh.” 
As you follow through with your swing he catches your hand, and you struggle against his grasp. “You know, starting to sound like you think about me a lot.” He smiles, dropping your hand. 
“Don't flatter yourself,”
“Don’t need to. You’ve been doing it for me.” He runs his hand up your arm, pulling you closer. Your balance falters and you fall on top of him. 
“Could you not?”
“Then stop me,” He’s right you could stop him, you should. But his warmth feels nice against you, and you haven’t had anything close to this in forever. He puts his hands on your thighs, you somehow ended up straddling him, hovering above him. Your faces are so close to one another. He leans up, his hips knocking against yours, he pulls your face down to his and kisses you. It’s fierce and sloppy and tastes like beer and smoke. In a blur he’s flipped you over, and tugged your pants off of you, holding himself up between your thighs. 
“Why don’t you put your mouth to good use for once,”
“Oh yeah, where would you like it, Doll?” You push him down, pressing his face against your cunt. You can feel him smiling against you, your fingers lacing in his hair to hold him still. Grinding yourself shamelessly against his mouth. His tongue hot and sweet, the feeling so much better than your hands ever could be.
He licks slow stripes up and down your folds, swirling his tongue around your clit, bringing it back down to poke at your entrance. Sucking your clit into his mouth and rolling his tongue around it. You bite down on your hand to stop yourself from moaning, your other hand wrapped in his hair pressing him against you. You’re practically humping his face as he eats you out, he hums against you, groaning as you tug on his hair. 
He brings his hand to trace up your thigh and pulls his face away to nip and suck at the sensitive skin of your inner thighs. Two of his fingers pushing their way inside of you and curling to press that sweet spot inside. He brings his tongue back to lap at your clit as he works his fingers in and out, drawing you closer and closer. It’s almost embarrassing how quickly he makes you cum. Clenching down around his fingers, pressing your hips up against him, his tongue making lazy circles on your clit as you shudder and spasm. He pulls away and you see that stupid smug look on his face.
“For someone who hates me, you sure did cum a lot on my tongue.”
“Shut up,” you hide your face with your hands, but he pulls them back down.
“Nah,” He throws his shirt to the side, and slips out of his jeans. You don’t dare to look at him, naked, knowing he’s probably even more frustratingly hot without the clothes. “You still gonna hate me after having this cock?”
“Yes.” You close your eyes as you feel him lining himself up, he slaps the head of his cock against your already sensitive clit. The wet smack sound it makes is filthy.
“We’ll see, Doll.” He pushes in, fast and without much warning. He’s bigger than you thought, and the way he stretches you out makes you bite back a whimper. He trails small bites up and down your neck and shoulders, you shudder beneath him.
Why did he have to feel so good? You couldn’t stop yourself now, even if you wanted to. As he thrusts in and out of you, hard and ruthless, you can’t hold back your moans any longer. The way his cock drags along your walls, hitting sensitive spots, forming you to his shape.
“Fuck,” you whine and you feel him smirk against your skin.
“That’s it, let me hear you.” He whispers in your ear before returning to bite down hard on your neck.
“Ah, Fuck… that hurts…” But he ignores your protest, you imagine he could draw blood if he wanted but he doesn’t. He pulls away to lick at the teeth marks.
“Oh sorry princess… that one might bruise.” 
“Fuck you,” You drag your nails down his back and he groans. He brings a hand up to your chest, unsheathing his claws to tear apart the fabric of your shirt and bra. It practically dissolves into shreds in one quick move. Before you can say anything he chimes in.
“You can borrow one of mine.” 
He watches your tits bounce as he fucks into you, his eyes dark and hazy. He fondles them in his hands, squeezing them firmly. His thrusts never letting up. You can feel yourself getting close again and he knows it too. The way your hatred falters and you aren’t restricting your moans anymore, the way you're clamping down on his cock, your walls fluttering around him.
He brings his hand to his mouth, spitting on it, and then dragging down between you to messily rub at your clit. Your eyes roll back and you groan, it's almost nearing overstimulation. It makes your eyes water. You don’t even hear his claws come out before you feel a slight sting along your collarbone, it is barely enough pressure to draw blood, just enough to leave scratch marks in their wake.
You can’t even think enough to berate him for it. Your mind goes blank as you cum around him. “That’s it, cum on this cock. Let me feel you.” 
You feel him begin to falter as he pumps into you a few more times before pulling out and shooting sticky pools of cum onto your stomach. He grabs a towel from the floor and wipes it off of you before laying down next to you. Pulling you close to him as your sudden exhaustion sets in and you close your eyes
……………………
 The sun trickles in from the window, and you realize very quickly you are not in your own room. You slip out from the heavy arm around your waist, and make your way to the kitchen. Praying it was too early for anyone to be awake. You didn’t run into anyone in the hall, but as soon as you step in the kitchen, there’s Jean.Sitting by the counter, two coffee mugs in front of her.
 Jean looks you over, her eyes stopping at the very obvious claw marks and bites along your shoulders. Logan’s t-shirt. You were so screwed.
“Long night?” She says as she pushes a cup of coffee towards you.
“Shut up.” You take the coffee back to your room. Hoping that you had something to cover up all these goddamn marks, having found yet another reason to hate him for.
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snailpebbles · 3 months ago
Text
First View - LN4
Pairing: Lando Norris x streamer! reader
Summary: Lando stumbles into your stream as your only viewer and decides he'll stay for a bit. Or forever. *This will be a series! hopefully!*
wc: 1.4k
tags: straight fluff, love at first sight IM SORRY, Lando is horrendously down bad, reader is just vibing
⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊🍊˚ 🧡୨♡୧ ⋅🔸˚₊‧꒰ა🟠໒꒱ 🍊‧₊˚
Lando was bored. He’d just flown back to Monaco after the Belgian Grand Prix, electing to wipe the entire thing from his mind like usual. Max was busy, instagram is dry, and tiktok has long since lost its luster. After doom scrolling for a prolonged amount of time he decides to go to hell with it and open Twitch. He hadn’t opened the app in months; not since his last stream. He should probably get back to that..nah. 
Once opened he’s met with the usual flurry of same old same old, and the bored begins to creep up on him once more. Until he stumbles upon a streamer with zero viewers and potentially one of the most gorgeous faces he’s ever seen. As he clicks on the window and your face is brought to fill a decent size of his screen, Lando realizes he is now truly in the presence of what must be an angel. Sure your camera is absolute shite and you’re doing nothing; staring at your phone as your game sharing screen is black, but he knows he’d be content watching for hours.
You stay silent for a little longer until you glance up, making Landos rapid heart come to a full stop as you meet his eyes unintentionally. You’re absolutely captivating he realizes, even more so when you freeze and awkwardly laugh upon noticing your lone viewer. As you shyly wave and fix the seemingly handmade blue beanie on your head Lando makes a quickfire decision that he’ll just stay here. Forever. With you. 
“Uhm..hello?” You start awkwardly, clearing your throat as you turn your phone off. Internally he curses himself for not switching to a different account, now he can’t type without giving away his identity. Damnit. “Sorry, I’ll actually start playing something now!” The laugh that bubbles from you fills his heart and rings in his mind akin to wedding bells. Wow, he’s down bad. 
He watches curiously as you disregard the games on your desktop and open a new tab, typing in…CoolMathGames? Huh? 
“This is some hardcore gaming if you ask me.” You mumble, shitty laptop microphone making your voice all crackly. He doesn’t care, you sound angelic to him. You load up Papa’s Cupcakeria to reveal a level thirteen save. A smile spreads across his lips at how insanely adorable he finds this to be. 
Once you begin playing Lando takes the chance to analyze a new side of you. As you play you squint, so maybe you need glasses or that singular light isn’t enough for you? Your lips purse when you concentrate and he’s overwhelmed with the need to kiss their chapped state. While you wait for the orders to come through you chew on your bottom lip, digging into the soft flesh there unknowingly. Lando notices, of course he does, and now the little imperfections he can barely make out make a little more sense. How often do you do this and would you let him kiss it better? 
Jesus Lando get a grip.
He stays on your stream for awhile, chin resting in hand as he listens to the silly games music and your quiet comments and cheers of success whenever you get a ‘perfect’ on icing. Never once has he felt so..comfortable. It’s like you’re a salve for all the stress he’s felt over the past season, disentangling his nerves with every lopsided grin and huff of a laugh. It’s obvious to him that you’re hyper aware of his presence, ironic considering his own peaceful state. 
After going up three more levels and a whole lot of not so silent cursing at customers with annoyingly long orders, you hesitantly speak to him.
“Uhm, I’m gonna be heading off now..? Thank you for sticking around for so long though!” He feels butterflies erupt in his stomach as you speak directly to him, your one man audience that’s embarrassingly enamored by your soft-spoken words and pixelated face cam feed. That feeling is quickly replaced by an overwhelming dread once he remembers he hasn’t said anything! At all!
How does he be suave? Cool? What is the one chat he could send that’ll make you visibly swoon and instantly feel how he does?
Hey! Super cool stream, would love to see some more haha! 
Oh my God what was that!? 
“Thank you..that’s really sweet.” You smile at him and he feels like the Sun has just finally shined down on him, blessing him with warmth. “I’ll make sure I stream tomorrow, just for you.” You promise, winking smoothly at the camera. Sure it lags and your voice comes through choppily, but Christ he’s never felt so giddy. Not since Miami at least. 
The stream cuts off and unfortunately for him, doesn’t save. Now he feels cursed, staring at the empty screen like you’ll magically stream once more and provide that safe haven again. He reluctantly closes his laptop after following you and turning on notifications, no longer caring about the repercussions for doing so on his public persona account. 
⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊🍊˚ 🧡୨♡୧ ⋅🔸˚₊‧꒰ა🟠໒꒱ 🍊‧₊˚
The next day comes and every notification has Lando on edge. On multiple occasions he’s tripped over himself trying to reach his phone only to see some pity attempt from the F1 admin needing content. 
He leaves them on read like almost every other driver.
Towards the end of the night, it finally happens. With an excited grin he clicks on the notification, heartbeat speeding up as your face appears in the bottom of the laptop screen. You laugh as you seen your viewer count instantly tick to ‘1’ and wave. 
“Well hi..I’m assuming this is the same dude from last time?” A smile spreads across your face and you glow, fixing that same stupid beanie on your head even though it’s definitely too big for you. 
Yep, just me. Promise i’m not a creep!
Was that stupid? Creepy? Lando manages to fully panic in the two seconds of lag time it takes for your answer to come through.
“Alright..Lando? I’m going off your user here.” As you speak you load up the same game as last time, starting a new day. “Any particular reason you’re watching me, a rando, stream a game on a kids learning site?” 
It’s too dumb to say that you’re comfortable like a hug, or make him feel all gooey and warm inside with a simple flash of that pretty smile. It’s too forward to type how he thinks you’re the most beautiful existence yet, or that he couldn’t go on living without basking in your presence for at least a little. 
you’re a good streamer, very nice
Nice? That’s the best he could do? Christ this is horrible, you’re going to frown and he'll crumble to the floor never to be seen again-
“That’s really good to hear, hopefully you’ll keep feeling comfy.” You chuckle, taking his words to heart as a simple compliment instead of what they are: a bumbling love confession. “I’ll just be doing the same thing, but I can talk if you’d like..? Sorry, very new to this.”
do what you want, comfort streamer
Well that was cheesy and embarrassing, what if he weirds you out? You seem happy though, smiling brighter and even through the pixels he can see your subtle fidgeting. Maybe this won’t be too bad, as long as he chills the fuck out.
You continue playing, this time talking with him about everything and nothing. College, your classes, that one asshole in third, how disgusting fish is (this made him fall hard), and the intricacies of dating. Lando believes he was a tad obvious on that one, but after confirming that he’s the same age as you and not some creepy old dude or whatever, you seem to be reciprocating just a little. Or maybe he’s delusional.
Max would say the second one, even after everything. 
Eventually you do have to go, but promise to stream again soon and tell him all the gossip that's sure to happen after your sister's wedding. The screen goes black once more, you having gained five levels in the time you two had spent talking the others ear off. He sits back in his chair with a goofy grin, feeling like he’s well and truly relaxed. You’d gotten all shy when he’d mentioned how comfortable you’d felt to him. Like a soft pillow were his exact words, ones he agonized over for ten minutes afterwards in strict embarrassment even as you giggled. 
He’d wait as long as you like, internally promising himself to never miss a stream and keep you as his newest haven. Him as your biggest supporter and you as a warm beacon of calm. 
⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊🍊˚ 🧡୨♡୧ ⋅🔸˚₊‧꒰ა🟠໒꒱ 🍊‧₊˚
a/n: okay so this will be multiple parts, pinkie promise! I love them a lot even though I didn't get to show much of them much this chapter smh.
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biibini · 2 months ago
Note
Heyy!! I really love your modern!mizu work sm 😭😭🫶 I was wondering if you could please write how modern Mizu would act when her and reader have an argument? Tysm if u do!!
modern!mizu in arguments
tags: modern!mizu is rlly sweet but ngl u spooked her a sec , tw: midterms , college au , reader is lowk mean & crazy from all the stress , resolved in the end ♥︎
a/n: just bc i want to be levi’s wife doesnt mean i’m leaving mizu just yet <3 my past few quarters have been beating my ass (im finally surviving)
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modern!mizu would be the type of person to get anxious if something goes wrong at the beginning of ur relationship
and let her fight or flight kick in
bc she let her guard down the first time around (thanks m*k*o)
tbh i wouldnt rlly imagine yall getting into a fight
but i feel if a fight did happen, it would most likely stem from misunderstanding and misinterpretations of what u guys say
for example, a small argument at the beginning spooked her due to her previous relationship having little to no communication
before the first argument, u had just gotten home from a long school day filled with lectures, annoying group mates, and a senseless amount of studying
midterm season was approaching
things were a lil tense
u had hoped to destress and maybe cuddle with ur gf instead of being crammed into a dorm with two other girls with their crazy studying schedules
only to find her busy with her work
“I’m home!”, you yell into the hallway. The rain had just started pouring and you were sopping wet. Thank goodness your laptop was safe, but the rest of your clothes weren’t.
“Anyone home? Hello?”
Frustratedly, you jangle the keys out of the door. They sure wanted to be stubborn with you today after ALL the things you witnessed today.
An early lecture class that you were half awake at. A failed attempt at working with your group mates for your communications class, with Akemi being the only person that actually showed up. Your teacher becoming the strictest they’ve ever been. It wasn’t your fault that he’s going a divorce, but it sure feels like it.
And after all that came your awaited time to study. Only to find your favorite places filled to the brim with students who giggled and gossiped in their corners, making the noises grow larger and larger. God, freshman are the worst.
You were on the verge of insanity.
The sudden change in weather nearly pushed you to your edge.
Arriving at the apartment sopping wet, you were relieved to finally take off your wet shoes by the door, hoping to finally unwind and let go of the annoyance of the day.
With no answer to your call, you assumed it was an empty apartment and huffed, attempting to let go of all the stresses from the day. You hung your bag, letting it dry from the pouring rain. Little did you know how fucked you would be when you opened the bag to find your lecture notes, damp from the rain.
Sent over the edge, you throw your notebook onto the kitchen counter in an attempt to dry the papers. You were so screwed if they weren’t dry by the midterm this week.
You cursed as you dig up the rest of the contents in your bag, only to find them damp and wet from the rain. The only thing that truly stayed dry was your laptop due to its case.
“God, fucking damnit.”, you swore to yourself, continuing to lay out all the contents.
First, your things needed to dry NOW. Without those notes, you would be going into that midterm blind.
Now, it was you next.
You stormed into Mizu’s bedroom, fueled with rage and annoyance from everything today. It all felt like it was crashing down with every step you took. The tiredness, the annoyance, the wetness, the heavy weight of your drenched clothes. You couldn’t wait to take off everything and be dry & clean.
The door swings open right in front of you, hitting you face first. You step back to find Mizu with headphones on, wide-eyed, realizing what she just did. In the brief silence, you could hear the faint noise of the drums and bass being blasted into her headphones.
That was your final straw.
“Oh shit, sorry Y/N, I didn’t know you were home-”
“You couldn’t hear me lose my shit just now?”, you snapped. “Really now?”
“Y/N? What’s going on?”
At this point, you were too tired to care.
“What’s going on is that I’m wet, I’m fucked for my midterm tomorrow, and I just- I just need to go take this shit off.”, you huff, pushing past Mizu.
Before you can even move past her, Mizu grabs your forearm, pulling you back from your momentum.
"Hey.", Mizu said in a sincere tone while squeezing your arm, hoping to meet your gaze.
"What.", you snapped at her.
"I'm not the only person who's busy here.", she retorted.
You looked back to spot her eyes, dead and exhausted, forming dark spots under her eyes. You could tell how worn out she was, staring at formulas and mismanaged group projects all day. Her dull hair was in a disheveled bun, barely hanging onto the butterfly clip you had bought her a few weeks ago.
"Look, I've been working on these midterm projects all day too. My project group mates barely did their shit and our capstone check-in is coming in so soon… I need to catch up now and—“
“Could you at least be aware of your surroundings when you do work on your projects?”, you scoff as you past her and grab a towel and a hair dryer.
You walk back to your damp belongings, hoping you make it in time to minimize the damage. What you didn’t expect was your girlfriend also following your footsteps.
“Y/N, please…”
You wipe your chargers and pencil cases dry. You’re glad they’re safe and secure. As for your notes, you fear that’s a different story.
“Honey…”
You heard her but to be frank, your priorities was your drenched notebook, currently sopping up all the rainwater. You plug in the hairdryer and immediately get to work, hoping it’ll be enough to save you for the midterm coming next week. Some of the ink starts to bleed. You can only hope for readability as the pages on the notebook start to lighten.
“Y/N.”, she calls out.
You turn up the heat settings of the hairdryer as you continue to point the air on the important notes. It becomes more readable.
“Y/N!”
“WHAT.”, you snap back.
You look back in annoyance and see Mizu behind you with a house fan in her hands, eyes widen. You fear your response was a little too loud as you spot the power cord tremble in her hands.
Oh Mizu…
“Um, I’ll just put the fan here.“, Mizu states, whipping around in hopes of plugging in the fan quickly.
“Mizu, wait, I didn’t mean to—“
“No, it’s okay.”, she cuts you off. “I’ll just… um… I’ll just—”
You can hear the stammer in her voice. You reach for her arm before she can hide away. It’s cool to the touch, almost cold.
“Mizu, I—”
She turns around to look at you. Her eyes used to look tired but now they’re so shaken. God, you forgot how much words hurt.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at your earlier and now. I was so absorbed and stressed with midterms and the rain and everything about today. I’m so sorry, I should not have exploded like that in front of your face, especially since you have midterms as well. Mizu, I’m just so—”
“Overwhelmed?”
You sigh, “Very.”
A small smile grows on Mizu’s face. You let go of her forearm and smile back.
“Me too honey. Me too.”, she sighs in relief. “C’mere.”
Her left arm wraps around your waist, pulling you to her side. Were you a little damp? Yeah. Did she care at this moment? Not a chance.
“After we get these notes all nice and dry, do you want to take a nice, warm bath and you’ll talk about your day and I’ll talk about mine…”
Your face warms up as her hand starts to slowly feel up and down your side. Her touch felt so warm and welcoming.
“Mmhm”, you hum in agreement.
Her mouth slowly inched towards your ear, her breath dancing over your lobes.
“and maybe, afterwards, some de-stressing?”, she hints, breathily. You don’t need to look at her to know she’s smirking.
“I wouldn’t be opposed.”, you tease.
Besides, Ringo wouldn’t be back until next week.
Mizu places a kiss on your cheek. She plugs the fan, double checking to make sure it is aiming at your notebook, as well as your bag.
“Thank you for your helping, Mizu.”, you say as you kiss her on the cheek.
“No worries.”, Mizu says as she grins, pulling you to her again to steal another kiss. “We’re both stressed, we need breaks every once in a while.”
“Hmm, I wouldn’t count that last part as a break—”, you jokingly question.
“It’s a maybe… just putting the thought out there.”, Mizu defends, putting her hands up.
After your notebooks are dry, you notice that most of your notes are fine. Thankfully, you remembered Akemi was in the class and were able to get her digital notes from her iPad.
As shitty as your day first started, it couldn’t come close to the end of your day. You got your hot bath and rant, as promised. And maybe that last step too.
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