#I’m lazy so I don’t do that often but every time I do it’s true! every original post it’s literally always white ppl! all their reblogs

[boyfhee]

박성훈 、COUPLE CODE

sunghoon pouts when he's jealous.

featuring ⋆ rich boy! sunghoon x fem reader

contents ⋆ light kissing, jealous sunghoon ( 1061 )

notes ⋆ brought the heat back is making me want to write jealous fics for every single member i can't do this. anyway RICH BOY HOON WLCM BACK!!!!

“you’re pouting,” you say, reaching out to grab his hand but he slides it out of yours ever so swiftly. 

“i’m not pouting,” sunghoon mumbles, not even caring to look at you as he makes long strides to a secluded corner, away from the chatter of the charity event his parents dragged him to along with themselves. 

“you’re not good at lying,” you snort, following him wherever he’s going. he gives you a little run for himself when he’s like this— literally, because you keep increasing your pace, having a hard time keeping up with him. and when you finally do, hands around his wrist to stop him. “c’mon hoon, you don’t have to be jealous,”

“jealous?” he huffs, jerking his hand out of your grip as if you’ve insulted him, the words bruising his ego. “you’re saying i am jealous? what makes you say that?”

“it’s written all over your face,” you reply with a sigh, eyes glazing over his expression and the very obvious pout that he keeps denying is there. you simply stare at him for a few seconds before shaking your head and reaching out to cup his face. “you’re jealous and you’re pouting. it’s the most adorable thing in the world,”

and sunghoon would be lying if he said those words didn’t give him butterflies, especially with the way your hands are on his cheeks, squishing them a little to make his lips jut further in a pout. 

“you don’t know what you’re saying,” he huffs in mock offence, eyes looking away from your face as if he does not like this, albeit having no attempt at pushing you away. 

you know he’s just being dramatic, fists clenched on his sides even though you know his hands are itching to wrap themselves around your waist and pull you closer. it’s cute, even though you don’t particularly enjoy seeing him upset and it’s obvious that he can sense how much fun you’re having, which makes him pout even more.

“is this about jongseong?” 

“jongseong?” his eyes narrow at your face, the said name ringing in his head again and again as he takes your hands and pulls them away from his face, although still holding him ever so gently, contrary to the look in his eyes. “you’re on a first name basis with him?”

“we’re friends,” you giggle at the way his eyes squint further at your words— and he couldn’t be more obvious with that pout on his lips. “i don’t attend these events often so dad wants me to socialise,”

“you’re socialising with the enemy,” sunghoon glares at you, prompting out a chuckle from you at his words. he frowns at your reaction, making you laugh even more.

“you hate him, i don’t,”

“boyfriend’s enemy is your enemy too. that’s the couple code,” he states bitterly, fingers slowly interlacing themselves with yours. his brows are furrowed in irritation, lips still in a never ending pout— you think you love this version of sunghoon more.

sunghoon doesn’t pout.

as he claims, most of the time, even though you know it’s not really true. he pouts when you don’t give him attention, or when he calls you in disappointment to cancel the dates because his dad wants him to assist him with work and election campaigns— you can hear that pout through the phone when he speaks. sometimes, when your phone rings up between your lazy make out sessions, he pouts again, and you have to make sure your eyes are on him as your fingers trace over his lips and cheeks while you’re trying to get over that call as soon as possible. 

even now, when you two are silent and he’s looking down, fiddling with your fingers, you notice how his lips switch between a pout and an irritated scowl, the way he huffs at how absurd it all seems to him. and sunghoon is not a very jealous man— well, not until now. you’re used to him brushing it off when you tell him about some guy trying to get your number. ‘well you turned him down and you’re here in my arms so i don’t care—’ the usual response. 

although, you know about the rivalry between him and jongseong— jay, as sunghoon would like you to address the other guy— nothing could’ve made you assume that your dear boyfriend would be jealous over just a ten minutes conversation with him. you didn’t want to make him jealous, but that doesn’t mean you’re not enjoying this little exchange. 

“no more talking to jay. he’s the worst,” he mumbles, looking up at you with the exhibition of his bruised pride in his eyes. “and no more calling him jongseong too,”

“we’re friends, hoon,”

“he was interested in you,” he insists and words get stuck in your throat. it’s not a secret that jay had tried asking you out several times. there’s no doubt he was— or is still interested in you, if there’s any chance. you wouldn’t want to make sunghoon upset over that either way.

“valid,” you nod, agreeing with him to console his shattered ego, although trying to come to a conclusion in the middle. “okay, no more talking to jay when you’re not around,”

“good,” sunghoon wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer before pressing his lips against your cheeks. “he sucks anyway,”

“true, i don’t like his attitude,” you nod in an attempt to humour him.

and he’s not exactly convinced, since you and jay have been friends ever since you changed majors last year. he doesn’t ponder over that much, pouring all his attention on you and peppering your face with tender pecks. 

“and he’s not cute like me either when he pouts,” he pulls back after capturing your lips in a chaste kiss and puts his forehead against yours. you know you two should be getting back to the event, knowing your absence will not go unnoticed by either of your parents, but sunghoon has been through a lot today— as he will say it later— and so you decide to hold him in your arms a little longer.

“of course not,” you say with a kiss on the top of his head when he nuzzles his face in the crook of your neck. his continues to draw soft circles on your waist through your dress, something that makes you hug him tighter. “you’re the cutest,”

taglist

[sinstear]

ㅤ ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤ ❝ 𝐢𝐟 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧’ 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐞, 𝐨𝐡 𝐧𝐨 ❞

eye contact with abby is something she loves a little too much. at first, she didn’t know what to do when she found you always looking at her when she would talk, or listen to a conversation. if it was her speaking, and you looked so into what she was saying, abby would get caught off guard few a couple seconds as her baby blues found yours already concentrating on her, and only her. you’d be nodding to her words, and your lips would curve up into a smile when she said something that made her laugh, a happy memory that would trigger her to smile and sometimes giggle. you watched it all. never once missing anything to do with her.

you’re the same with abby, but you don’t notice like she does sometimes, if you’re talking about something that happened to you that day, her intense stare catches you off guard. half the time, she isn’t even aware she’s staring at you that much or often until you splutter out a little “you’re just looking at me like that, can’t focus.” and she thinks it’s the cutest thing possible. how you get all shy and stammer on your words. at certain times, and points of any conversation, abby can’t help but smirk more at all of your reactions to her staring. the roles reversing just slightly that now has you the one looking away shyly, trying to regain your composure.

or the nights inside, in the warmth with a warm cup of hot chocolate in your hands, and she’s too focused on the movie you’ve both decided to watch and when she turns her head to ask you if you’re enjoying it, she already catches you looking at her with a soft expression on your face and a smile resting on your lips. abby’s face flushes a crimson red, but you can barely see it under the dark lights, but it’s there and she welcomes it so easily that she just gives you a lazy grin that had you reaching over and tucking a strand of her loose hair behind her ear. “you’re so cute,” you can’t help but mumble and press your lips to her temple. the softness of your words and actions had her melting more into your touch by the second, the movie long abandoned.

“you’re cuter,” abby smiled softly up at you, brushing her knuckles over your cheek slowly. “much much cuter than me.” a giggle fell from between her lips when you leaned down just to kiss her forehead, your lips resting against her skin and had her sighing contently against you. “cutest girl i’ve ever seen” came her truthful whisper.

“i don’t believe you,” you smiled, lightly brushing strands of her hair away from her face. “you are undeniably the most handsome yet beautiful person i’ve ever met. i get lost in your eyes for hours, i love the color and i love how you look at me.”

“like what?”

“like nothing around us matters. not when you look at me like that,” you pointed out, those baby blues peering into yours like you both were truly the only two people in the world. “when you look at me like that, nothing but us matter. if i have you, i don’t need anything else.”

“maybe it’s true,” abby smiles, reaching her hand up to cup your cheek. “maybe it’s true that when i’m with you, nothing else is important” the pad of her thumb brushes against your cheekbone, and her heart melts in her chest when you’re leaning into her touch. “because nothing but you matters. you’re the only person that matters to me.”

leaning more into her hand, you kiss her palm tenderly and smile down at her. her thumb quickly catches the tear that rolls down your cheek without hesitation, and wipes it away softly with another gentle smile. “i didn’t know true love, not until i met you.” you mumbled, more or so speaking into her palm.

“i’ll show you every day how much i love you,” the blonde promised, removing her hand from your face to wrap both her arms around you, tugging you carefully into her chest. your head rests comfortably on her shoulder as her fingers run up and down your back. “i’ve never had a love like yours. didn’t think i deserved it, but it’s different with you. with you, i have a purpose to get out of bed every day, with you i don’t feel scared, with you i feel at home. i love you more than the sky needs stars and i’ll never stop showing you how much i love you.”

[eternalfics]

hi, this is the anon who sent regarding the elysia!reader x saiki ask!!

elysia!reader is an elegant, sweet, calm and cheerful person who is always positive, they're described as someone who "enjoys everything", they often flirt and tease their peers here and there + they're a little egoistic (knows that they're pretty, cute n shit like teruhashi for example)

when they don't like someone she passive aggressively and lightheartedly insult them in a way

so they're basically like teruhashi except that they're a really selfless person + is aggressively kind to everyone!! it's only a summary of elysias character but i hope this cleared it up to you!!

saiki with a sweet! reader

summary: saiki with his annoying true love 😘

a/n: okay, anon. I know I’ve been lazy lately but yk ur girl she just had to snooze for a bit 😴 BUT IM BACK AND READY TO FEED UR SAIKI BRAINROTS 😜 (a bit hyper too)

okay like the angel you are, your very nice to saiki (why wouldn’t you be? 🤨). as saiki’s s/o, it’s your job to- AHEM

compliment him every second of his life

be the extroverted partner in this relationship 😊

be the definition of an angel

bond with his parents 😉 (might aswell leave you if you don’t)

DO NOT TALK TO TORITSUKA

and many more! so let’s make headcanons for those erm- ✨rules✨ that I made perfectly for you.

COMPLIMENTS: who likes compliments? I do! anyway, compliments are a sort of good and bad thing for your relationship. there’s times where saiki feels down and his insecurities take over which is where you come in! instantly hyping him up. (ur amazing) and there is also times where saiki’s in his ✨confident era✨ (that’s what you call it, I think he’s getting tired of it 😭) and maybe he just wants a little bit of getting spoiled (rarely). but!! there’s also times when you are down and kinda upset. he’s used to your cheerful and happy personality! and he’d rather keep it that way too. so sometimes he just does a little bit of ✨speaking into ur mind✨ (ik I added too many sparkles, stop)

Scenario/Blurb

“Did you do something with your hair?” the voice randomly ringed in your head. You jumped, and looked around only to see Saiki putting his elbow on the table while he rested his head on his hand. You instantly move your hand up to wave at him cheerfully. “You noticed! You aren’t looking so bad either,” you thought back at him. You swear you saw the side of his mouth turn up..

MBTI: yay, we’re on personality! fun fact: saiki is an INTP I am too, this is a sign we’re supposed to be together 🤫 . it’s expected to you to be the extrovert of the relationship right? well it’s right! 🤪 but sometimes it’s a struggle-

saiki often panics (mentally) in public if he loses you. you’re like the fan in a hot place, the light in the dark to him, so you can’t just leave him!

sometimes, you encourage him to try something new! e.g: maybe a new outfit when you guys are going out/ going out with friends. he wonders how does he say yes every time 🤔

Note: Ik this isn’t enough soo I’ve decided prob tomorrow or something that I’ll edit my post and you guys get more! Deal? 🤓

Update: so.. it’s been like more than 3 months.. I don’t think I’m ever gonna finish this ❤️❤️🥰

[qnomnstrs]

College Student! Yuji x Older! Female Reader

Yuji is 20 while reader is in 30s. No curse AU

Now that I'm on break I'm hoping to get all my drafts pushed out. Sorry if this feels rushed, im lazy.

Warnings: 18+ Smut, oral M! recieving, oral F! recieving, coercion, friends to lovers, 69 position, angst, minimal plot with porn, mentions of Uncle Sukuna, mentions of parental loss

Yuji talks in Pink

Reader talks in Blue

Word Count 2.8K

You lived close to a university, in a cul-de-sac. You purchased your own home! You lived here for 2 years now and loved it. You had a nice backyard, garage, and a two story home. It was a small two-story house but it was just for you, it worked. All the extra space let you have an office and Studio. You were living the dream. It was easy since you didn’t have any kids. During this self growth era, you have tried dating here and there, but found you work best single. You still have plenty of friends and visit often with your elderly neighbor.

The cul-de-sac was peaceful. You took up morning walks, to take in views and get out of the house. The campus was only a few blocks down, so you would even walk past all the people and scenery. You often stopped at the Café on campus or sat by the water fountain.  

The one thing that wasn’t your favorite: the boarding house across the street from your home. They had parties occasionally. They would toilet paper the cul-de-sac homes, including yours. It was young adults having fun, being independent. It’s not like they had huge parties in the movies. The noise was often controlled. Still, it wasn’t your favorite thing. Next time you bought a house you would be sure to look out for any boarding houses.

Today you found yourself cleaning up said toilet paper off your front lawn. It was officially summer and there was a big party for the graduates. You continued to pick up the toilet paper, searching over your lawn. You sighed thinking your grass was getting long again. It was such a chore to mow every week and weed wack. You looked around for any remaining pieces of toilet paper. There was some behind your shrubbery. You bent over the shrub in an attempt to clean it.

“OH! Um excuse me miss?”

You swiftly turned. A man stood directly behind you. He must have come to ask you something, right as you bent down in front of him. You didn’t even hear him approach. He was younger than you. He wore a tank top and was quite muscular. He had pink hair, which you thought was cute. We love a guy who isn’t afraid to wear pink. He had a school lanyard on his keychain, presenting him as a college student.

“Sorry didn’t see you there! Yes do you need something?”

“I was wondering if you needed any lawn services for the summer. I can mow, trim shrubs and take care of weeds.”

“Hmm well I normally do it myself because I don’t want to pay a lot for lawn care. So how much is it?”

“For your yard… its not quite half and acre, so 20 a week . 30 for shrubs and weeds”

“Wow that’s actually not bad. Are you not going home for the summer?”

“I live in the boarding house right across from you. I stay there year-round. I have lived with my uncle since I was young. He’s great but I’d like to have my own space now. I can’t quite afford an apartment yet. That’s why I’m going around the Cul-de-sac trying to mow lawns for money.”

“Well, if you want money, I suggest raising your prices”

He laughed “well it takes an hour or two per house, so I make 20 an hour on regular houses.”

“that is very true I might have to start my own lawn care business.”

“Hey! This is my block! Don’t you dare try stealing my customers now.”

You both laughed. It was really easy talking to him. The social anxiety seemed to dissipate. He has such a warm bright energy that was just so comforting.

“oh I’m sorry I forgot to ask your name. I’m y/n the owner of this house.”

“Im yuji. You seem a little young to own your own house miss” yuji said so effortlessly flirty. You rolled your eyes at his compliment. You still smiled at his charm .

“Well I definitely own it and I’m definitely like at least 10 years older than you so I’m not that young.”

Yuji scratched the back of his head and chuckled in embarrassment.  “well anyways if be happy to start this week if you’re interested.”

“sure thanks Yuji.” He waved and walked off to the next house.

 It wasn’t long before Yuji came back that week. He would bring his own mower and other supplies. You looked out the window, to confirm that it was Yuji, in your yard. You went to go grab cash and have it ready.

The summer heat kicked on early this year. The sun was beating down hard. Yuji was dripping in sweat. He took off his shirt and wiped his face. His muscular frame now exposed. You lingered at the window a bit longer than intended. He spotted you, smiled and waved. You blushed and waved, quickly moving. You didn’t want to look like you were staring, because you definitely weren’t. You decided to prepare some ice tea for him. That’s why your eyes lingered too long, was because he seemed so hot, you told yourself.

 Yuji came to the door once done. You invited him inside for a drink. He happily accepted. It was a nice break for him. Your house was in his route during the middle of the day. This was a perfect time to relax and get to chat with you. You figured others would offer him a drink as well, especially your elderly neighbor. They absolutely did but Yuji only ever accepted your offer.

A few weeks went by, Yuji came over every week and you invited him inside every week. You enjoyed the company. You’ve gotten to know him a bit better. He was such a gentleman. He was caring and sweet. His personality was so refreshing. You often looked forward to seeing him. This time though, Yuji seemed a little fidgety. He was not acting normal.

“Hey yuji are you okay? I hope the heat didn’t get to you.”

“N-no im fine I just- listen y/n, I’ve been wanting to tell you that I really like you. I enjoy spending time with you and was wondering if I could take you out sometime.” Yuji looked at you right in the eyes when he confessed. He was nervous but he wanted to show his determination. You flinched not expecting that.

“Yuji…. I appreciate the offer, but I think I will decline. You’re very nice and I like our talks but I’m a little old for you. I’ve dated quite a bit and one of my biggest things was I always said yes. Even if I wasn’t attracted to someone I said yes. I figured those feelings developed later. I realized I should be interested before I say yes. I learned to have more expectations and our age gap bothers me, I don’t think I’d feel like I’m in an adult relationship. You’re still in college too. I hope this doesn’t make you to upset. I just don’t want to lead you on. Its better to talk about it up front. You’re a very nice person, you should look for someone closer to your age.”

Yuji sighed and rubbed his face.

“honestly…..I think that made me like you even more. Thank you for being so honest. I just really like getting to know you. I admire you a lot you know? Your very mature and so well put together. That’s the type of person id want to be with. Don’t worry I’ll still clean your yard well.” He tried laughing it off. You smiled and felt a little ache in your heart. Yuji probably wasn’t feeling too well, you basically said you don’t think he is man enough to date you. He left shortly after with a smile still on his face.  

After that Yuji still continued to come every week. You still invited him inside and he still accepted. It was almost as if nothing happened, almost.

It was Saturday, your day off. It was around 10am and you still slept. Yuji wasn’t coming until 1pm. You heard a knock at the door. You went downstairs and answered.

“hey y/n sorry if I woke you up. I just finished your yard. I had a few cancelations today, so I finished a little quicker.”

“OH! no that’s okay- sorry I slept in a bit today. You still can come in, I need to grab my wallet.”

“are y-you sure? I can come back later if you want?”

You walked away to your end table by the couch. The door was still open with yuji in the doorway. You bent over not realizing you were still in your oversized shirt and no pants. Your panties were exposed for Yuji to see. His eyes widened and he stared right at your ass. You wore a plain pink thong. So, your whole ass was showing. He tried to look away, to give you some decency but he couldn’t. His eyes traveled lower to your clothed pussy. He could see the outline of your labia. The thong left little to the imagination. His cock twitched in his pants, slowly coming to life.

“yuji you’re fine come inside. I made some muffins yesterday help yourself.”

With your back still turned, Yuji rushed inside, to the kitchen. He tried getting away from you, as fast as possible. You blinked, confused why he was so rushed. Maybe he really likes muffins? You walked into the kitchen, to see Yuji stuffing his face with muffins.

“wow they must be good huh?” You chuckled and placed the money on the table. Yuji looked up and your nipples were hard. He could see the color of them too, through your sheer white shirt. He tapped his foot restlessly. His cock was now fully erect.

“Um yuji are you-“

“y/n! Please! I’m a man still you know!”

You looked at him puzzled. What did that have to do with anything? You looked down and realized you were in your night outfit. You blushed profusely.

“oh my God! I’m sorry I didn’t-“

You stopped rambling as you saw Yujis erection in his pants. He was huge. Damn thing was resting on his thigh. You gulped. Of course this damn guy had to have a thick cock. He spoke pulling you out of your thoughts. He definitely noticed you staring. He made a desperate plea in the midst of the situation.

y/n please can I-… eat you out?” He once again looked into your eyes with a fierce determination.

“what!?”

Yuji clasped his hands together, “please y/n we don’t have to date or anything just please let me eat your pussy please. God it’s all I want”

You clamped your thighs together and bit your lip. You didn’t mean to tease him like this. You forgot Yuji is still a guy with needs to. It turned you on to be wanted like this. It still felt wrong. You were sure what to do. But then again, what is exactly stopping you? Yuji is a handsome guy, killer personality, and huge cock.

“..o-okay”

“Really!?”

“yes really”

He smiled. You both got comfortable in the living room. Your heart was beating out of your chest. You went to sit on the couch.

“No I want you to sit on my face.”

“what? That wasn’t apart of the deal!”

“Please y/n just-”

“Okay fine”

Yuji laid on the couch, you carefully moved your legs around his head. You haven’t lowered yourself yet. Yuji gulped and grabbed your hips. He gently pulled you lower and slipped your thong to the side. You were now fully exposed and he got to see all of you. He groaned starting to plant kisses to your pussy. You moved your hands into his hair. You squeaked at his eagerness. He flattened his tongue and took a big lick. He lapped at your folds roughly pushing his tongue against you.

He removed his hands from your hips to unzip his pants. You couldn’t see him behind you, pulling out his cock. One of his hands went back to your hips while the other jerked himself. He wasn’t ashamed to loudly rub himself and groan into your pussy.

 He nibbled at your clit sending a wave of pleasure down your legs. Your thighs twitched as he continued. You were getting distracted by the noises behind you. You could hear the dry rubbing of his hand. He was moving up and down very fast. You started to hear squelched noises from him roughly rubbing the precum on his slit.  You bit your lip, you wanted to see his cock.

“Yuji I want to turn around it feels better that way.” You lied just wanting to watch him pleasure himself. He almost didn’t let you get up. You moved and looked into his wide eyes. You shouldn’t have. He looked so desperate. His lips were shiny coated with your fluids. You switched and planted yourself back on him. Now facing his cock.

He shoved his tongue into your hole moving it in circles. You squirmed and squeezed his head with your thighs. You gasped out and whined at his aggressive movements. Yuji was acting like he was starving.

You watched as he continued the assault on his cock. It was flushed red, especially his tip. The way he was mistreating it, dry rubbing, must have been a little painful. He was practically rubbing his cock raw. It seemed he was getting off at you watching him. He put on a little show, he was desperate for your attention.

You licked your lips. You really shouldn’t be doing this. Your brain is clouded with lust. It felt so good to be ate out. And the thick veiny cock in front of you was calling your name. Without warning you bent down, pushing his hand out the way and deep throated his cock. You groaned at the stretch in the back of your throat. You felt yuji yell into your pussy. His cock was raw and sensitive , being in your mouth was sending him over the edge. He began rapidly kissing your entrance. It was like he was thanking you. He continued sloppily kissing your pussy, fantasizing his cock was entering you pussy. Both of his hands gripped your hips pushing you harder into his face. He started lightly thrusting his cock into your mouth. You began sucking him off like it was the last cock you’d have. You went up and down. As you came up you kissed his tip and licked around the head. Yuji whined.

“Please y/n be gentle my head is really sensitive right now.”

He spoke into your pussy. You didn’t listen, however. You continued to assault his tip loving the taste of his cock. You felt this was payback for this predicament. Yuji became whiny licking your clit.

“Y/n please I can’t last long if you-“

You deepthroated him again sucking hard. As you went back up you sucked his slit. You were giving the tip of his dick a hickey. Yuji tried moving his hips, pushing you off. It was too late he came, hard. He groaned into your pussy a few times. Yuji came in your mouth, and you spit it back out all over his lap.

You were about to speak when yuji buried two fingers in your cunt.

“Wait Yuji!” You moaned, forgetting all about your pleasure for a moment.

“Y/N I wanna show you I can take care of you. I wasn’t supposed to cum first. Let me pleasure you, please”

Yuji’s fingers pumped in roughly rubbing against your walls. He hit all those sensitive spots. His fingers curled and prodded. You whined. He added his tongue back to the mix. He licked around your opening, where his fingers connected to you. He then focused on your clit, with gentle nibbles. Then he shook his hand back and forth. The sensation was something you’ve never experienced. Your pussy fluttered and you came. You squirted on his hand and face. You moaned as he continued the sensations while you rode your high. Your body tensed. No one has ever made you squirt from just fingers before. You got off of his face, catching your breath.

“What the hell was that?”

“You like that trick?” Yuji sheepishly laughed “Sorry it was payback for making me cum quick.

For a moment everyone was silent. Many emotions and thoughts surfaced. Yuji looked at you. He wanted to say something but waited for you to make the move.

“Yuji is that date still on the table?”

[filth-burps-writing]

Rules of being a superslob

This lifestyle isn’t for every lazy guy with stains on their shirt. And I’m not going to tell you too just be lazier. This is a detailed list of rules for those of us who want commit our whole lives to being as digusting and piglike as possible. For those who’ve already given up working and showering. For the piggies who really want to roll around in the muck. I won’t say anything obvious because I know you’ve already done it but somethings I might tighten up what already do.

Food

No vegetables. Ever. Not a single one. Not only do they take up important room in your obese belly but they give you energy and make you healthier and you need to be as tired and sickly as possible.

The slob nutrients are; fat, calories, carbs and sugar. Eat as much of these four things as possible. If you can stomach it eat them in their purest form. If not enjoy a constant barrage of delicious junk food containing plenty of these things.

Eat as much as humanly possible. Try to always be as stuffed as possible. Eat constantly and at high speed. If you don’t feel like you belly is filled with rocks you need to eat more.

Every drink should either have over 600 calories or have bubbles to make you burp. If a drink has neither of these do not drink it.

If you drink alcohol always have some to hand. I’m sure you’re already familiar with its slobby effects.

Behaviour

Make as much noise as possible! Don’t just let fly your supersized farts and belches make your grunts, groans, moans and any other noise be heard! They’re all beautifully digusting.

Be an asshole! A true blue superslob doesn’t give a singular fuck what anyone thinks so let any possible rule go! Be as rude and unpleasant to be around as possible. And don’t forget to be crass! Swear, yell, scream, talk about sex constantly. If you want something get it.

Drool. You’ve probably started noticing some drips around your mouth and on your various chins. This is a good sign! Make sure your slack jawed as often as possible and delight in the sludgy goop that slides out of your mouth.

Be stupid. Remove all clocks and books from your home. Watch porn all the time. Lower your brain capacity as much as possible.

Stay lying down. I know you love sitting but you need to move as little as possible. Set up your bed and stay there. If you need to move do so as little as possible and as slow as possible.

Clothing

Stop wearing bottoms. I’m sorry you have to part with your dearly beloved stained joggers but they’re limiting you. The only thing you should be wearing on your lower half is a stained, tight set of underwear. Keep your old pants close by by piling them up under your pillow so you have lots of stink close to your nose.

Stop buying or washing clothes. You already have plenty and changing clothes at any time is impeding your stink potential. Find your dirtiest, smelliest t-shirt, put in on and never take it off.

Your new uniform is a pair of underwear and the t-shirt from the previous step. Never ever change your clothes. Just watch them get dirtier, sweatier and smaller as you grow.

Pour seed oil on your belly twice a day. It’s fun, it makes you extra greasy and it gives you some nice gross acne to make your belly even more repulsive.

Sleep

Never fall asleep before three am. You should ideally be nocturnal to be as unhealthy as possible.

You can take naps but try to do something like eat a heavy meal after you’ve woken up so you stay lethargic.

Use caffeine wisely.

Sex

Find a partner who supports you to do all the work and to help you with not moving. They’re are plenty of freaks out there who will love your sloppy ways. I’m one of them.

Use sex toys and tools for pleasure!

Try to make your kinks as terrible as possible! Find new and innovative ways to be a pervert!

[mirensiart]

Look, I truly do realize it’s frustrating to be asked the same thing over and over again, but sometimes when looking through a blog to see if something’s been answered, you skip over where it’s been answered, or you don’t quite understand so you ask a similar but different question in hopes of elaboration or for it to make more sense. Yes, sometimes it’s just people not bothering to read the pinned post, but other times it’s an ask for clarification.

Also, when someone asks you what something is, it’s not necessarily them being too lazy to figure it out themselves, it’s often them wanting to initiate a sort of conversation, they want to know what YOU think of something. What is lu? Is it a super cool comic that you like because of the dynamics shown? What is it to YOU? That is what people are asking.

I’m not any of the people to whom you have given the ‘look it up/it’s already been answered’ responses to, but almost every time you say it has more and more felt like a slap in the face and a ‘you’re stupid for asking’.

I want to engage and interact with your content, but the way you respond makes me feel like I have to quadruple check things to make sure it’s not going to get a negative response. Maybe I’m just sensitive, and you’ll just get upset with me (I’m certainly used to it irl), but I feel like it’s important to tell people when they’re coming off as mean and don’t seem to realize it.

I don’t want this to ruin your day or anything, and I truly enjoy your work and think you’re a great artist.

Ok so, I understand where you’re coming from but a couple of things to take into consideration:

1. It’s all about the tone and the way people ask the thing. Some people just come out as entitled and rude, at least to me, which is why it irks me and bothers me. There’s been people who have asked things I’ve answered before, hell the very same question about what linked universe is, I’ve replied to it before with no problems because the person who asked was nice! I do understand not looking at the entire blog for an answer. Another example is the mipha’s grace question, I have gotten it a ton but there are twists to it, some people add interesting details or questions, I don’t mind that at all. It’s when people just come at me with an entitled tone that I don’t like. Maybe I come off as rude myself because tone is so hard to read over text, but I try to be as nice as I can regarding my own circumstances

2. I am doing all of this for free. I have a job and a pretty awful personal life right now lol I create content and I share it with you all and I engage with everyone during my limited free time. I don’t have to reply to everyone, that is true, but I do and I try to as much as I can. I encourage people to send me asks actually since it’s thanks to this that I’ve been able to come out with more ideas for the content I’m making, but sometimes it is too much. I do apologize if I come off rude some days, again I don’t share my personal life online, but I’ve been dealing with the loss of 2 close family members that I lost in a short period of time, so I have bad days. Again it’s not an excuse, and I apologize again for coming off rude, it’s not my intention and sometimes the constant pressure of engaging with people and my own personal problems gets to me. And you guys shouldn’t pay for it.

3. English is not my first language, and i do get meaning and tone mixed up A LOT. I’ve had problems with it before, and I’ve had misunderstandings online cause I took something said to me wrong because of different meanings and ways to say things in Spanish . I’ve come off super rude to people when I’m not trying to cause that phrase or tone is said differently in Spanish and the same has happened vice versa, aka I misunderstand people in English cause some ways to say things come off as super rude here. Again, not an excuse, but it is a problem I’ve been dealing with for a while. I do strive to do better and to learn the language better. So I suppose I can only promise to try harder next time.

All in all, I will be more careful with my tone and my replies from now on, I really don’t want to offend anyone or cause a misunderstanding. I appreciate you telling me though, it helps to remind me that I need to separate my personal life from my online presence, and just not reply to people when I’m not having a good day, since I am more prone to be annoyed that way.

I do hope you have a good day (or night) and I thank you whole heartedly for the honesty. And you’re not sensitive at all anon, I was rude, i appreciate you telling me that. And please don’t feel as if you can’t engage with me, I really want this to be a fun space for everyone, so I’ll try extra hard to make this all a better and safer space for everyone.

[teawithnosugar]

Singer!Ellie headcanons

AN: oh em geee, hi hi hi. I know it’s been like AWHILE and I promised a oneshot (it is still in my drafts and more than halfway done) but I’ve been crocheting for a good 8 hours straight, it’s 4am, and I put my rlly rlly old playlist on shuffle and the songs gave me IDEAS. I did not follow my usual format (???) on this cause likeeee…yk, I’m sleepy and tired and lazy. Also this isn’t like super accurate cause obviously I’m not a singer and idk how they work.

CW: none rlly, I mentioned reader wearing dresses once

★ Imagine Ellie writing music not in the Arctic Monkeys or Chase Atlantic way a lot of ppl picture but in the Boygenius (pretty common) and Ed Sheeran way iykwim.

★ She’s rich af but doesn’t spend big amounts of money unless it’s for you. It doesn’t matter if you have your own money or you didn’t ask her to— SHE WILL SPOIL YOU.

★ Picture her in the most “okay” looking clothes that are so low quality that it makes her itchy but she’s buying you Versace dresses and shit.

★ She’s never told anyone except for Jesse (you guys’ bff and her music producer) but whenever she’s planning her next tour or concert with her staff, she tries to suggest dates and times that are convenient for you to watch. She absolutely needs you in the audience for her to perform well but she would never ask you to change your schedule for her.

★ Nah but just imagine her singing smtg like Perfect or True Blue on stage and her eyes are on you legit 99% of the time and people on tiktok post abt it nonstop.

★ If you had a career that made you just as famous as her, you bet she’s saving every single edit of you she sees on tiktok or insta.

★ Obviously she has your initials carved on her guitar and obviously everyone saw.

★ She’s already written many different versions of what her vows would be once you guys got married and every time she had a new draft, she’d turn the old one(s) into songs so they wouldn’t be a waste.

★ She never told you but one of her albums was just all old drafts of her vows to you.

★ You fully trust her 100% but sometimes you need reassurance every once in awhile but you also don’t like bothering her. She tells you all the time that you could never bother but you’re stubborn so whenever she’s staying late at the studio because she’s busy she makes Jesse send pictures of her to you like once every hour or so so you could see that she was truly at work and not doing anything else (like bereal ig).

★ She also made sure to tell Jesse not to say that she told him to do it. He just says shit like “ooh like at how obsessed this bitch is with you, this new song is cheesy af” so it comes off as him teasing you instead of reassuring you.

★ Is super awkward but in a charming way.

★ Your wedding would be super private and as soon as you guys are married, she takes time off work more often to spend more time with you.

★ In conclusion, she’s down BAD

[save-the-villainous-cat]

Requesting experienced villain x virgin hero :)

Make some luuuv

Sssmmsssmut

“You should be more careful,” the hero said as they washed the blood off the villain’s shoulders. The water in the bathtub was still scorchingly hot — just how the villain liked it — but now it had undertaken a muddy colour. Blood and soap mixing together, leaving a disgusting view that captured the least gruesome part of the last hours.

The hero stared at it, mesmerised, until they leaned over the edge of the bathtub, both arms resting on it, and started washing the villain with the washcloth in their hand again. At first, the villain had wanted them to join them in the tub, had offered warmth and lazy kisses. However, the hero had refused, blaming the villain’s wounds. It was…partially true. The hero was concerned about them but they were also incredibly nervous.

Their lover didn’t seem to be in the right state of mind to actually do something like this. And the hero was too inexperienced to do something like this.

“I’m fine,” the villain whispered. They exhaled and a deep-seated sigh escaped them. Something within them started to relax and they closed their eyes, leaning with their head back against the tub. “You always worry so much.”

“Well, you’re a reckless person.” With a simple motion, the hero ran their fingers through the villain’s wet hair, scraping their skull here and there, pressing a kiss to their temple. “I don’t want to have to kill for you again.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that,” the villain said with a hint of exhaustion but there was also some amusement to their tone. As if they’d enjoyed watching the hero murder someone else. It had been a criminal, yes…but that didn’t make the hero feel better.

“Do you ever…feel mad?” the hero asked.

“Sure. I get angry when I’m frustrated.”

“That’s not what I mean,” the hero said. They wrung out the washcloth, swallowing, thinking. It was difficult to talk about certain topics with heroes which was also why the hero felt so drawn to the villain. They didn’t know exactly what this relationship was, if it even was one, if the villain even had those. It was kissing and making out and talking. Making breakfast together. Sleeping on the couch. Nothing more. “Do you ever feel so mad it sickens you? Do you feel like you could destroy the world if someone pushed you a bit too far?

“I like where this is going,” the villain joked. They cracked an eye open and pulled themselves up again, sitting in the water with hunched shoulders. Scars created constellations on their back, spreading over the skin. Sometimes like rivers, sometimes like lightning. It was a whole fucking artwork to the hero and they had traced every single one more than just one time. They were obsessed with the villain, completely enchanted by everything they did.

As so often, they followed a particularly big scar which they knew the villain disliked, and followed it all the way down, disappearing in the warm water.

“It’s a stupid thought,” they muttered, lost in thought.

“Not stupid. Dangerous.” The villain — surprisingly — pulled the plug and let the water disappear in the drain. The hero watched as the water level sank and revealed more of their own arm. “Don’t walk around telling people about this. They’ll weaponise it.”

“I wasn’t planning on doing that,” the hero said.

“And yet, you told me.” The villain smiled at them lazily, showing off their teeth. Their hand reached out, slipped under the hero’s shirt and found a comfortable place right under their neck.

It was strange. Both holding onto each other. The hero’s finger pressing a vulnerable point on their lower back, the villain’s hand nearly grabbed their neck. The hero pulled away but the villain did not.

“Because I trust you,” the hero said. “Idiot.”

That made the villain laugh and lean against the bathtub again. Half of the water was already gone, making it possible to view the villain’s bare chest and the hero couldn’t hold themselves back from gawking for a second.

“You’re cute.” Without a warning, the villain tugged on the hero’s hair gently. It wasn’t even painful, just playful but it still shocked them. Like every little thoughtful touch.

“I’m scared of it,” the hero confessed. “I’m really scared of it. I’m not a monster.”

The villain tilted their head. “No, you’re not.”

For an unpleasant moment, there was nothing but a thick silence and the sound of water leaving the tub. Finally, the villain groaned, let go of the hero and put the plug back in before they filled the tub anew.

“Come here,” they said gently. “Take off your clothes and come here.”

The hero froze and even their breathing stopped. Shirtless was all they’d ever managed. They knew the villain wouldn’t mind if they didn’t want to.

The hero also knew the villain had done approximately every little thing there was to intimacy. Had tried everything. With other people.

It was normal for the villain, the hero supposed, and somehow that triggered that little part they were afraid of.

Nevertheless, they obeyed, letting their clothes fall to the ground and grabbing the bathtub as they let themselves sink into the hot water and onto the villain, each thigh on either side of them. The villain smirked lazily. Constantly. All the time. But right now, it was soft.

“Easy,” the villain warned. The hero tried, really fucking tried to relax but being choice 321 or whichever number of situationship they illustrated for the villain was irritating. They were replaceable.

They were so irritated, in fact, that they hadn’t noticed the hands on their waist, holding them in place. Nor how they were sitting on the thick muscles of the villain’s lower stomach.

“When we kissed for the first time, was that your actual first kiss?” the villain asked quietly. The hero leaned forward, trying to ban the thoughts of jealousy and obsessiveness, thoughts of actual madness. They welcomed the warm water, how it captured them and didn’t let go.

“No,” they said. “I had my first kiss with sixteen.”

“And since then?”

“I kissed a few heroes,” they said, fairly sure the villain could say the same thing about themselves. God, the hero was afraid of what they were getting themselves into. A whole if-I-can’t-have-you-no-one-can-type of thing. They shuddered.

“Nothing more?”

The hero stared at them. Stared at their enemy underneath them, vulnerable, sweating, wet hair. Beautiful.

“You’re asking too many questions,” they decided eventually. And with that, they leaned over and left a trail of wet kisses up the villain throat which earned them a low groan, followed by fingers digging into their flesh.

“Sweetheart—” Despite their whiny voice, the villain seemed eager, pulling the hero closer, trying to catch bare skin with their own lips and leave a few mark. Before the hero even knew it, they were chest to chest, panting as the hero found the villain’s lips and kissed them possessively. It was raw, obsessive on the hero’s part. How they clawed at the villain’s hair, soaking in their heat and rocking their hips on their stomach.

“You spoil me,” the villain wheezed once they pulled away.

“I despise you,” the hero said, pulling at the roots of the villain’s hair to get more access to their neck.

“Liar,” the villain said but it was slurred, drunk on the feeling of ecstatic pleasure.

“Moan my name,” the hero demanded, lips close to the villain’s ear.

But the villain started chuckling, sobering up really quickly, if their reaction had been real in the first place.

“Such a little monster,” they said. “Let me make it good. Let me help you forget your fears.”

With that, the villain’s hand slithered right between the hero’s thighs.

[gurugirl]

can we start over | part 5 sneak peek

As requested!! - Sorry not proofread fully! 1k words

...

Mr. Allen was on the phone again. He’d called you into his office but the moment you stepped in he got a call and told you to sit and wait. That it would only be a minute.

And it was only a minute. But then he got another call and now it was 23 minutes later while he was still yammering about some person who was just the worst.

You were used to it, though. Mr. Allen was retired so nothing was a rush for him anymore. Which also meant he held other people up. But waiting for your boss was the least of your worries.

His wife and her ever-changing personality was your biggest concern. She was, to put it mildly, a monster. And to make matters worse, she ran the whole household so you were often seeking her out for things. Mrs. Allen also handled her husband’s schedule and if he was running behind guess who got the blame. That’s right. You did. Every time.

And it was the same thing over and over again. You started your day trying to keep Mr. Allen up to task, failed, got reprimanded and degraded by a nasty human, held back tears and then took a long drive with loud music to clear your head with a quick stop for dinner, probably at a drive-through.

Needless to say, you were already planning on quitting. You’d gotten really lucky with Alfred. And even working with Harry hadn’t been as bad as it was working for Mrs. Allen and her husband. But you tried not to think about Harry if you could help it.

By the time Mr. Allen got off the phone he was running late for his physical therapy appointment. You got him moving along quickly and sent him on his way but not before Mrs. Allen started poking around and making comments under her breath.

“What was that?” You turned to look behind yourself at the wicked witch as she stood near the edge of the foyer.

“He’s late again.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

“That is correct.”

She rolled her eyes, “What’s the point of having a personal assistant who can’t even keep the boss on schedule?”

You smiled, holding back your true thoughts, “Well, being as my job description doesn’t entail using physical force on the boss, which is what it would take to get Mr. Allen to keep on time for anything, I’m certain you’ll find that once again, this isn’t my responsibility.”

“Lazy,” she spoke under her breath.

You tilted your head and squinted your eyes at her, “That’s the last thing I am. Now, if you don’t mind, my workday is over. Have a good evening.”

You walked past her to go into your room to pack up your laptop and leave. You’d stay at your own place that night. You hated staying at the Allen’s house. Not only was the room they’d given you a tiny spec of a thing with no windows, no closet, and not even a single rug to cover the cold tile floors but being anywhere near Mrs. Allen made your skin crawl.

“I don’t know why we bother with the room for you,” she was standing in the doorway when you turned around.

“You really didn’t bother much with the room in the first place. That’s why I don’t stay here. My house has a better bed with a big window looking into my backyard. I just feel better in my own bed at night.”

You walked past her and held your breath so as not to inhale her disgusting, pungent perfume. You used to like the scent she wore. But now you loathed it. Whenever you smelled it, even on another woman, it made you queasy. You very much did not like Mrs. Allen.

You turned up the volume on your car radio the moment your front tires hit the road. You always looked forward to going home after work. This day wasn’t as bad as you’d had before and tomorrow you’d do it all over again.

And instead of stopping at a drive-through for fast food, you decided you’d stop at the grocery store and pick up ingredients to actually make something fresh.

Typically you didn’t cook. You didn’t have time for it. Picking up groceries would put you home at almost 8 pm. And then you still needed to cook so you wouldn’t be eating until close to 9 and then you could finally relax with a glass of wine and a good book or something trashy on television. Which was why drive-throughs were your go-to dinner plans. It meant you were home by 7:30 and dinner was already cooked. Not the best use of money and certainly not the healthiest way to live but you wouldn’t be doing it much longer.

You had a meeting to attend with Mr. and Mrs. Allen the following week that piqued your interest. It was for a piece of art that they’d been looking for. And someone found it for them. From an art dealer who was not too far away. You didn’t know for sure but you had a feeling. And you wanted to find out if that feeling was right.

Maybe you were a masochist and just wanted to pour salt onto the wound of your split open heart one more time. Or maybe you did have some hope that it was Harry and that maybe you could try and receive his feelings for you once and for all.

But it’d been just over 9 months since you’d seen him and you were sure he’d moved on by now. There would be no reason for him to still be pining over you the way you were over him. And what were the chances that it was him in the first place? You didn’t know but you needed to find out.

Yeah. You regretted what you’d done. Pushing him away like that. But once you’d done it, it felt like it was too late to go back. Maybe it was your pride. Or that little voice in the back of your head that told you men always leave and they always lie. That anyone that might love you would probably just disappoint you in the end.

tags: @theastrologie @sassamanda77 @princessaxoxo @eiffelmezarry @justfattiethings @michellekstyles @yousunshineyoutempter @tenaciousperfectionunknown @golden-hoax @swiftmendeshoran @luvonstyles @tiaamberxx @lukesaprince @closureesny @justlemmeadoreyou @itsgigikay @angelbabyyy99 @lanadelharry @novasblogofstuff @gills-lounge @damnasstyles @malwtilda @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @0oolookitsme @babybunharry @anothermannharry @love-letters-to-uranus @itjustkindahappenedreally @kelly-fushiguro345 @ssaama @onlyangellucifer @harryistheonlyoneforme @butdaddyilovehim-hs @reveriehs @lc-fics @mema10 @carmenxharry @hannahdressedasabanana @babegoalsreads @icumforbaldrry @harrrrystylesslut @straightontilmornin @elidoho @bananabk9756

[lovecarisi]

Mistakes We Knew We Were Making

Chapter 4: The Earthquake

Weeks and weeks and weeks of Dominick and you. The door slams shut and your body is shoved against the wall in your hallway, or bent over your kitchen island while he pulls off your underwear, hands hungrily finding you wet and ready for him, every time. There is an insatiable desire between hot kisses and you barely manage to pull down his jeans enough to get him out, hard as a rock, dying to bury himself inside of you. Your trembling bodies become one and you moan each other’s names in the dark. It doesn’t last long, but it’s always what both of you want and need. 

Sometimes you make it to the bedroom and then it’s slow and lazy but never any less desperate and intense. Every now and then he kisses you goodbye after and you watch him leave with regret, you can tell he feels it too but quite often he asks to stay and you let him. And when that happens, you regret it just as much. It’s the way you feel his chest rise and fall as he holds you against him, his breath tickling your neck. When all the heat of passion, want, and sex has escaped your body and the night is supposed to be just peaceful and still. How can he just sleep like that while you’re left alone with your thoughts? While your mind is racing, overthinking? Eventually you do fall asleep and most mornings Dominick is gone, only a cup of coffee remaining for you on the nightstand.

You still have the occasional breakfast together and it’s nice, but he has accepted the fact that it might be something he wants, but you feel awkward about. Truth is, you’re not sure how you feel about it. It was sweet when he did it the first time, you think back fondly; you two sitting there eating and laughing. But you’re worried how it would become too homely with him and then it would get too comfortable and well, there’s the rules. The goddamn rules. It’s sort of fucked up that they exist in a vacuum since most of the time when you’re naked together and Dominick’s body feels so good and you whisper those sweet nothings to each other it seems there are no rules. What a hypocrite you are; you demand this closeness, this intimacy, to own him in such a way. Just for this moment, and then it’s over and you send him on his merry way and although you crave him again immediately, you don’t allow yourself to have him permanently. And why? You can’t answer it. All you know is that it wouldn’t work.

________________

‘God, I’m starving.’ you cry as thunder rumbles in the distance and the first light raindrops begin to fall. Finally. It’s been humid all day, the pressure and heat trapped between the buildings of the city.

‘Let’s go out for dinner then.’ Dominick suggests. The two of you on his bed, on your stomachs, chins resting on your forearms, staring out the window. You’re grateful for the cool breeze that comes flooding into his bedroom. 

‘No. I said no dates.’

‘Oh, come on. Don’t be like that. It doesn’t have to be a date. You’re hungry, I’m hungry, let’s just go eat.’

It’s true, he keeps asking. And you keep saying no. Hanging out is cool, going out for dinner together with your friends is cool but you draw the line at him taking you out for dinner. Maybe it’s silly but sitting in a restaurant together is what couples do. Plus, knowing him he would choose a place with a special ambience, not just a diner around the corner. 

‘I’m gonna order us a pizza because that’s what normal people do. In case you haven’t noticed, there’s a thunderstorm coming.’ You wrap the bedsheet around yourself and get up, wandering into the kitchen to grab one of the menus from his fridge as well as your phone but he follows you and takes them from you.

‘I can make us something. How about…bruschetta. You’re gonna love it. I promise.’ You know this is his version of a date but you have to give it to him. And you do love bruschetta. And you always love watching him prepare food with these beautiful hands of his. 

‘Okay…’ you give in and pick up your dress from the floor, pulling it over your head and chuckle as he runs back into the bedroom enthusiastically to put on some clothes as well before returning to the kitchen where you have made yourself comfortable on the counter. ‘Show me what you got, chef.’

‘Well calm down, it’s just bruschetta.’ Dominick laughs while getting his cutting board and knife out, then heading over to the fridge to take out the ingredients. 

‘People have been known to fuck up bruschetta. Hell, I once ate this soggy piece of whatever it was in fucking Florence, of all places.’

‘Not on my watch.’ he says with a serious look on his face as he picks the basil leaves and smells them before stacking and gently rolling them. 

‘So, you never told me who taught you how to cook, your mom?’ you ask curiously and he frowns for a second before continuing, cutting the basil carefully. 

‘Umm…no..umm… My grandma actually.’ he pauses and turns his back to you, washing the roma tomatoes in the sink and you get the weird feeling you might have said something wrong because the process seems to be taking way too long. When he finally returns to the cutting board his expression is unreadable. ‘I never really knew my parents.’ 

‘Oh.’ Is all you manage, and you wish you hadn’t asked, a feeling of instant regret in your stomach. 

‘Yeah, umm. They died when I was little, car accident. Drunk driver hit them. So my maternal grandparents raised me.’ He grabs a tomato but leaves it lying there on the board, just staring down at it as momentum makes it roll back and forth.

There’s a lump in your throat as you swallow hard and you join him in staring at the tomato, not quite sure what to say, or even what to do. Fuck. Even though you two had shared a few personal conversations, the topic of your families had never come up before. There had been comments about each other’s childhoods said in passing, yes, but nothing specific, you had never gone into detail. In all honesty, not much talking was involved when you two spent time together unless you were with friends. This is an entirely new situation. You reach out to softly touch his hand and thankfully, he lets you. 

‘Dominick, I’m so sorry. I…I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s okay, you couldn’t have known. Really. It’s okay. I’m okay. It’s been a long time.’ He looks at you, his thumb caressing your hand.

‘Still….I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say.’

‘It’s okay.“ He says again. ‘Like I said, I was really young. But yeah, guess now you know what made me want to become a lawyer.’

‘He got acquitted?’

‘Spoiled kid from a rich family. They just made it go away. Had friends in higher places my grandparents couldn’t match since they couldn’t afford a good lawyer. He basically just told them to take the money and the deal. They didn’t have a choice. They had to think about the future. I can’t blame them. And believe me, I don’t think people should be punished for every mistake they make. But I think there should be accountability. And buying your way out of shit that you created yourself, it shouldn’t be an option. Rich folks should have to face the same consequences everyone else has to face. That’s where the system’s corrupt. It makes me sick. Even then I knew it was wrong.’ he says and you nod in agreement.

‘How old were you?’

‘Three. I’m lucky that the few memories I have of them are happy ones.’

‘They would be so proud of you. And you will be an exceptional lawyer, I have no doubt about that.’ You slip off the counter and hug him; a fierce, heartfelt hug that you keep intensifying by hugging him closer again and again. Dominick sighs, resting his cheek on top of your head, his arms wrapped around you tightly. 

You don’t know how long you two stand like this. It’s only your stomach growling loudly that breaks it up. He laughs and you apologize, your cheeks bright red with embarrassment. 

‘No need. All I want to do right now is make that fucking bruschetta for you.’ He kisses your hair. ‘Thank you.’

And he looks at you adoringly, like no man ever has.

__________________

‘Can I stay with you tonight?’ you ask, after licking your fingers clean. That bruschetta really hit the spot, delicious. 

You sit by the open window, watching the rain fall, the latest crashing thunder has just subsided. It’s really pouring down now. 

‘Well, I wouldn’t send you out in this weather.’ Dominick replies with a smirk, grabbing your plate and walking over to the kitchen to place it in the sink along with his own.

‘Me asking to stay has nothing to do with the weather and everything to do with the fact that I would like to stay with you tonight.’

If Dominick wants you to admit it then fine, you’re going to admit it. You really want to stay with him. It has nothing to do with not wanting to dread the conditions outside, being too lazy to get on the train, sex, or anything else. You just want to be with him. Perhaps it’s the way he opened up to you about his parents, the way he was so vulnerable for the first time. Of course it was a coincidence that the conversation went in this direction, but he didn’t have to take it that far. However, for some reason he did, for some reason he trusted you, and all screwing each other and being silly together aside, you feel just as close to him in a different way for the first time. And it surprisingly doesn’t scare you. You thought it would. Quite the opposite is the case actually; you want to protect it. Wrap it up in silk so it wouldn’t scratch, put a ribbon around it, then hide it deep within you for safekeeping. Like a sacred token. Even if you’re not sure what to do with it yet. You feel honored to have it, proud. And you are convinced he is aware and there’s a secret understanding between you two now. About this slight shift that has occurred, like tectonic plates after an earthquake, and where you settle isn’t quite clear but that’s okay. As long as you continue to tread carefully.

The smile he displays is nothing short of victorious. ‘If that’s the case…’

And you find yourselves on the couch watching Blade Runner. It’s not romantic because that’s not what you want, but it’s cozy and comfortable. Dominick has his arm around you and you’re leaning against him and for a moment you think, this is what couples do but right now you don’t think twice about it. 

When the movie ends he pulls you up from the couch and you go and brush your teeth together in his bathroom. Dominick gives you one of his shirts to sleep in and smiles when he sees you in it. It’s the strangest feeling when you get into bed together and it’s not with the usual feverish urgency. The one you had already satisfied multiple times earlier anyway when you returned from meeting up with your friends for a drink after work. Still, you had never gotten into bed with him unless you were, well, fucking. So now you’re under the covers with him, face to face and you feel oddly confused, not knowing what to do or say. This is a new version of you two. Here to stay, you’re not sure. All you know is that you love the way you feel wearing his clothes, the way they smell, the soft fabric on your skin, the thrill he obviously gets from sharing them with you. 

Dominick moves closer to you, your legs entangle under the sheets. 

‘What I would give to know what you’re thinking right now.’ he says, his hands resting under his cheek.

‘I don’t even know what I’m thinking right now.’ Now you’re the one moving closer, until your noses touch.

You feel like a walking contradiction with him constantly. Things you never thought you’d do, you’ve done with him. From the start he has managed to elicit from you thoughts and actions you were never capable of before. And he didn’t even have to try. It was just the fact that he existed. Any other guy would have taken advantage, would have used that power maliciously for sure. Not Dominick though. He gave you back that power. It was that fact that made it so good. Nothing made sense with him but everything made sense with him.

______________

You wake up to a rainy Saturday morning, and a new thunderstorm has crept its way in. The clock reads 07:04 and Dominick is still fast asleep, arms wrapped around you protectively while your head is resting on his chest. His heartbeat is steady, his breathing in a deep state of relaxation that could lull you back to sleep but you don’t want to let it. Your hand reaches out to tenderly touch his chest, fingers playing with the soft hairs there and he stirs but doesn’t wake so you continue, drawing small circles on his skin. Next, your lips join. Pressing little kisses where your hands have been and he sighs in his sleep, arms tightening around you while under the sheets you can feel him grow hard. This is what you wanted, and you can’t help but smile. Still, you wonder how long you can manage until he fully wakes. You resume with your kisses on his warm skin; gently, slowly, while breathing in his scent. Pulling down the sheet a little, you move down to his stomach, following that trail of hair downwards with your mouth, tongue sneaking out and it’s then you suddenly hear him sleepily sigh your name. Biting your lip, you look up at him but his eyes are still closed.

‘And what do you think you’re doing, hmm?’ he asks, voice husky.

‘I think you know what I’m doing, and I think you’d like me to continue.’ 

You kiss your way back up to his mouth and your lips meet his for a hungry kiss you withdraw from again immediately, his eyes flutter open, searching yours.

Without giving him time to think or say anything, you kiss him again before letting your mouth wander down his chin and up his jaw. He grabs you, hands already restlessly roaming over your body. Down his neck you go, softly nibbling, and you aim to pay him back for the hickey of that first week, knowing fairly well he doesn‘t mind, that in fact, it turns him on the way it had turned you on. So you sink your teeth into his delicate skin and a low moan escapes his mouth, god, you are so aroused by the sounds he makes, knowing how good you are making him feel. And you move back down to his chest but the truth is you want to get to where he had stopped you a few minutes ago when he had woken up. Down, down you go, over his stomach, and you can feel him tensing up as you get to the waistband of his boxer briefs but you don’t hesitate, you know exactly what you want. 

‘W-wait!’ he tries to stop you but you shush him and pull down his underwear and quickly take his already hard cock into your mouth.

And he tastes wonderful. And for once in your life you actually relish the feeling of doing this for a man. Because he didn’t ask for it. Because he didn’t expect you to do it. Because he didn’t pressure you into doing it in any kind of way. Because you wanted to do it. Because truthfully, the first time you saw Dominick, all you could think about was sucking him off, and you would have, hadn’t he turned the tables on you first. So now you're doing it. Holy shit you are doing it.

He is drawing in a sharp breath, your name escaping his lips almost in a protest but you know he’s just overwhelmed by the sensation of your mouth on him. Dominick looks down at you as your hands wrap around his shaft and your lips close over his tip, trying to get a feel for him. 

‘Oh God.’ Dominick moans, and you can’t help but smile. Having that kind of control over him makes you so wet, not to mention that beautiful cock of his in your face like that. You can’t wait to reduce him to an ecstatic, writhing mess. Oh the power you hold right now makes you feel all sorts of ways. And you’re ready to do everything for him since he deserves it, always looking after you first. Always fucking you to your climax before he cums, and often times, it’s not just once. 

‘I’m gonna be a good girl for you, are you gonna be a good boy for me, baby?’ you ask, flicking your tongue against him and he nods, eyes pressing shut, hands clenching the sheets, oh fuck he’s so hot.   

You trace the thick veins on his dick down to his balls, cupping them with one hand and squeezing softly, making him jerk. You spit on him, spreading your saliva and his pre-cum all over him, beginning to pump him slowly. He looks down at you again as you lick him up and down, your tongue gliding over his skin in slow-motion. Top to bottom you let your mouth glide over his dick, swirling over his sensitive head, your lips curl around him as your eyes meet, and you can tell the sight of you with his dick in your mouth is turning his brain to absolute mush. 

‘Am I doing it right for you baby? Does it feel good?’ You ask and he whines as though you have completely broken him, the tension in his thighs already increasing.

‘You…y-you…have no idea. Holy shit, babe…it feels….fuck!’ He groans, reaching out to run a hand through your hair as you pump him a little faster.

‘You’re so delicious, mmhhmmm.’ You mumble and take him deep into your mouth, as deep as you can and his eyes roll back, he pulls on your hair lightly. It’s the biggest turn-on. 

Slowly and steadily you begin to fuck him with your mouth, every now and then taking him deeper before pulling back to get some air. You tease his delicate tip with your tongue, dipping it into his slit, drawing more pre-cum from him, salty and sweet at the same time and you lap it up thirstily. Again and again you suck him in, letting him hit the back of your throat over and over, hollowing out your cheeks as you look for his reaction in order to find the right amount of suction combined with pressure on his base. He’s so hard, throbbing inside your mouth, as you move your mouth up and down on him faster. The look of pure lust on his face, the noises he is making are telling you you’re doing perfectly, and it’s not long before he is panting your name repeatedly in utter desperation, and you know he’s close already. You love the mess you have turned him into but it’s not like this is leaving you unfazed. You are wild for this man. 

‘Y-you gotta stop.’ he begs breathlessly but you laugh.

‘And why would I do that?’ your mouth wanders down to his balls, sucking there delicately, your thumb keeping pressure on the base of his pulsing cock. You know he‘s ready to explode.

‘B….Because I…I’m gonna c…um.’ his voice is shaking and he tries to wriggle away from you. 

‘I want you to. Please. I want you to cum in my mouth. I want to taste you.’ and you wrap your lips around him again.

At that last sentence a loud moan escapes him and you can’t even believe it yourself, that you said it and had meant it so sincerely. In the past you would have thought of it as dirty. You would have been ashamed. Not now though, not with him. 

Again you take him deep, stroking him a little faster, dying to make him shoot his load into you, dying to taste him. His hand reaches for your free one, your fingers entwining and he squeezes, his muscles tensing as your tongue flicks over his raw tip, swirling one last time, and he finally orgasms, his hot seed filling your mouth while his dick twitches in your mouth and he moans your name. The most beautiful sound. You continue to lick him clean, swallowing every last drop he’s giving you, the salty juice running down your throat. He’s shaking, out of breath, and you giggle, very pleased with yourself. 

‘Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.’ His eyes flutter open and you wipe your mouth, blushing a little and he looks at you, shaking his head. ‘What did you just do? What did you just do? You almost made me pass out.’

‘Well you didn’t. Which means I gotta try harder next time.’ You laugh and he grabs you, pulling you down next to him, kissing you hard. You love that he seems to completely ignore the fact that your mouth was full of his cum only seconds ago. 

‘Please don’t. I might have a heart attack and die.’

‘No, I wouldn’t want that to happen.’ You snuggle up to him, feeling really damn pleased with yourself.

However, it’s hard to ignore the way your panties are absolutely soaked, the way you are trembling with lust for him from sucking him off like that. You try to pull yourself together, burying your face in his shoulder while he is still catching his breath. But he notices. Of course he notices. 

‘Oh you.’ He turns to face you and you continue to try to hide from him, it’s too much, it’s all too much. ‘Let me.’

And his hand slips down between your legs, inside your panties, and he smiles as he feels your wetness, and the contact has you moaning into the pillow.

‘You liked it that much, huh? How sweet. You dirty, dirty girl.’ he whispers, kissing your cheek.

‘I loved it. I loved it, fuck Dominick…’ you confess, falling apart under his touch. 

He begins rubbing your clit tenderly, his fingers dragging between your folds, lingering at your entrance before moving back to your bud, circling there. It drives you insane how he won’t accept you giving him pleasure without him returning it, how he can’t just lay there in his post-orgasmic bliss but instead has to make sure he gets you off too. Oh how comical that he isn’t even your boyfriend because this guy is husband material and you know it. 

It doesn’t take long and he’s hard again, and slips between your legs, spreading you open, sinking inside of you. You need him urgently but he fucks you into the mattress at a painfully slow pace that has you whimpering his name. His lips are at your neck, you hold on to him desperately. Looking back that’s probably the moment when you first acknowledge the battle is lost although it was much sooner. What do you know though? There’s no point in putting down markers. The earth will shake again and again. The aftershocks will rattle you. You will both pick up the pieces, note the numbers on the Richter scale, maybe take some precautions, or not, for the next time. But all in all you will continue like this, staying in your rubble.

And afterwards you sigh and ask ‘Why do we keep doing this?’

Dominick looks at you puzzled. ‘What do you mean?’

‘I’m just scared.’ you confess.

‘Scared of what?’ He moves closer, gently moves a strand of your hair behind your ear.

‘Of the day we stop.’

He remains silent for a while before he answers.

‘Then I guess we can never stop.’

But you know that’s not true. You know you will stop. You know eventually it will end. You know he knows it will end. And that the earth will break open and swallow you both.

thank you @starch1ldz for beta-reading this chapter for me :)

[cool-and-caustic]

That’s actually so embarrassing when I see poc online who mostly interact with white ppl because..... What’s your excuse??? How does that even happen?? I get you can’t help where you live but we are online why is the ratio 1 poc for every 99 white ppl what’s going on???

Sometimes I see a contextless post someone saying “how do you know I only interact with white ppl?” And I get nosey so I go thru their blog and fr it’s just white ppl like they all have their race in their bio or a selfie or you could search their blog and they mention they’re white like that’s so embarrassing if you didn’t notice that I’m praying for you guys that’s not right I wish you healing I wish you the ethnic variation of a United States community college homepage photo

It’s always funny seeing ppl assume a user is white and then they pull out the “Hah! I’m not white!” bc like... that’s so embarrassing for you?

Especially when they mostly interact with white ppl (who have their race in their bio/post selfie’s/made it clear they are white). And it’s after they say some racist shit. Like.... come on you don’t have your race in your bio but have all fifty mental illnesses and your deepest darkest secrets and your preferred name and pronouns and you mostly interact with white ppl of course everyone thought you were white

[ghostfest]

People, please don’t be like me. Don’t put your life on hold cause of the void state. I’m absolutely embarrassed to say this but I am now in my 20s. I wasted few years on the void state.

The void state is not everything. I still have not got in yet. But out of false hope, I attempted the void state every single night. I once never got in or close to it.

I went into debt cause I hoped that I would get in and have all the money I want.

I stopped college and lied to my family that I was still attending college cause I hoped that I would change all my past grades and graduate.

I’m still stuck on an ex boyfriend cause I hoped I could go into the void and change things with him and I.

I became lazy as fuck cause I hoped I could get into the void and manifest new skills.

I put so much on hold. I’m now 24. I messed up a lot of things in my life just cause I put the void state on a pedestal. You guys are so so young! You can still attempt the void state but do not put your health and life on hold for anything. Please don’t beat yourself up if you don’t enter the void state. Please.

My current life is a mess right now.

I only say this because so many of you are so young. Please live your life too and don’t stress yourself out like I’ve done. I still live under constant stress and anxiety for the void but I’ve realized it’s not healthy to put it on a pedestal. :( 💕

The void state is our most natural state. We all can reach it. But do not let your mental health get this bad like mine is. You have to always come first.

True. People need to be more nicer to themselves if they don't enter the first time. Beating yourself up from every attempt is an endless cycle. It's possible to change your entire life without the void, which I think people forget often.

[writingdumpster]

stories of us

pairing: Jonah Heidelbaum x Hunter!reader

warnings: spoilers, canon level violence, guilt, reader has killed Nazis

summary: Jonah tells the reader he wants to have a family but she doesn't think she's worthy of motherhood after all she's done.

word count: 1k

When you joined The Hunt at 18 years old you knew you were sacrificing a lot of life’s simplest pleasures. You were giving up a home and friends. You didn’t expect to ever find love. Meeting Jonah was the best thing that had ever happened to you. You were both constantly moving, never settling in the same place for longer than a few months but you had each other. You returned to Brooklyn every now and then, but mostly you traveled. You hunted. 

Jonah and you found solace in each other despite the violence in your lives. There was so much blood and pain in your lives that the love and joy you gave to each other was the most treasured part of either of your lives. You talked about what you would do when you were done hunting as if it would ever happen–as if either of you would ever be able to give up The Hunt. 

A part of you wanted to give up The Hunt every time you looked into Jonah’s eyes. You saw home in Jonah’s eyes. You saw warmth despite their cool color. You saw love and protection and happiness. When Jonah looked in your eyes he saw relief. He saw forgiveness. He saw someone who didn’t see him the way he saw himself. 

“When we’re done I’m gonna buy you a house with a porch,” Jonah said. His arm was wrapped around you as you laid your head against his bare chest. You were lying in bed on a lazy Saturday morning. You didn’t have anything to do until the evening. 

“We’re going to move somewhere where the air is clear and I’ll eat breakfast with you on our porch every morning,” Jonah mused. He combed your hair through his fingers, his cheek pressed to your forehead as he spoke. One of your fingers was drawing aimless shapes on his chest. The words were sweet. Jonah’s imagined future would’ve been a dream come true for you. But that’s just what it was: a dream. There was no real truth to the words. You would never be done. There would always be more Nazis to find. 

“Hmm,” you hummed up, dismissing the thought. 

“What’s that mean?” Jonah asked, as he leaned away to meet your eye. 

“What’s ‘what’ mean?” You asked. 

“‘Hmm,’” he mimicked you. “You don’t want a home with me anymore?” He asked.

“Of course I want a home with you,” you assured him. 

“Then why the hum?” Jonah asked. You sighed. 

“We’re never going to be done hunting, Jonah,” you said. 

“Do you really think that?” He asked as he sat up.  

“Do you really think there will ever stop being Nazis to hunt?” You asked. “Think about Travis. He was our age. It’s just going to keep happening,” you said. Jonah pursed his lips as he looked down at you. . 

“But I want a family with you,” he confessed quietly. You fell silent. That was never something you discussed. You talked about a future together; about growing old; about sharing a home; but you had never said anything about kids. 

“You do?” You asked, genuinely surprised. 

“Of course, I do,” Jonah said. “You don’t?” He asked, his voice had lost its softness.

“I never really let myself think about it,” you lied. You thought about it often. You thought about how Jonah could tell your daughter the stories his Safta told him before bed. You thought of how nice it would be if you had a son that looked like his father. But you didn’t deserve that. You had killed too many times to be a mother–taken too many lives to be good enough to raise a new one. 

“Why not?” He asked. 

“We’re Hunters, Jonah,” you said simply, avoiding the answer. 

“You don’t ever want to stop hunting?” Jonah asked. 

“Do you?” You deflected. 

“Yeah,” he said. “I want to stop hunting one day and I want to marry you in the temple my Safta made me go to every week growing up,” Jonah told you. “I want to buy a house with a porch in a good school district and have two kids, one boy and one girl. And then I want to watch our kids grow up and get old and crazy in our house together.”

His story sounded beautiful. It sounded like such a happy and perfect life. But that didn’t change that you didn’t deserve it. It didn’t change the things you had done and the person you saw yourself as. It didn’t change that despite the violence you’d seen and danger you’d been in, the thing you feared the most was yourself. A tear slipped from your eye. Jonah noticed and furrowed his eyebrows. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked immediately. “What’s this about?” More tears began falling and you sniffled. 

“Jonah, I’ve killed so many people,” you said. Jonah’s expression fell soft. 

“Baby, no. You’ve killed Nazis. They’re not people, they’re Nazis,” he said. 

“But I’ve just…I’ve done so much hurting,” you said. “What if I don’t know how to do any helping?” You asked through tears. Jonah pulled you up and into his arms. You cried softly into the crook of his neck as he rubbed your back and stroked your hair softly to soothe you. 

“Everyone you have ever killed has killed more people than you ever could. They tortured my grandfather. Even after the war they killed Murray, and Georges, and my Safta. All you’ve ever done is help,” Jonah assured you. You nodded silently against Jonah’s shoulder. 

“You’re right,” you said softly. “You’re right,” you repeated, making yourself believe it was true. Jonah kissed your forehead. When your sniffles had subsided he spoke again. 

“I was serious, y’know?” He told you. “I want a family with you,” you said. “And I want to stop someday.” 

“I love all the stories you tell me about us,” you said. Jonah smiled warmly at you. 

“They don’t have to be stories,” he said. 

“They’ll still be stories,” you said as you leaned forward you kissed Jonah tenderly. You pulled away, keeping your noses pressed together. “They’ll just be true stories.”

[borom1r]

(In the ask box because tumblr on phone dislikes me and will not show the lil note thing to reply on actual posts for Some Reason) I fuckin loved the Gondor/Rohan cultural influence thoughts if you do dish up more of the Thoughts I am so here for it

WOOFWOOFWOOF you’re enabling me. you’re enabling me!!!!! anyways screenshots from our DC dms bc I’m a lazy gremlin who cannot be bothered to re-type:

So this is like. this gets into a lot of half-formed thoughts abt other aspects of potential Rohirric culture and the overlap with iron-age Norse culture there which ties into the Gondorian overlap with fucking. Christians. WHICH IS ITS OWN CAN OF WORMS. but jts a can of worms were about to open

sorry if this is poorly formatted and rambly I’m sick and I don’t have the time off from work so there’s THAT and this feeds directly into my autistic special interests AND I’m a heathen so it also ties into my own religion :3

but when I was adding to the costuming document I made an offhand note about the fact Éowyn’s fashion most likely aligns more with Gondorian noble fashion than actual Rohirric fashion — bc the signifiers of nobility in iron-age Norse fashion came less from the type of garment but from the layers, dyes, and accessories. Éowyn, however, is dressed in a way which explicitly stands apart from the few common Rohirric women we see. so like.

Gondor as a homogenizing force.

I’m not going to use “colonizing” because Gondor never explicitly COLONIZED Rohan, but it very much has always positioned itself as Rohan’s better, and this holds true to Aragorn’s fucking coronation.

extrapolating from Norse culture, it seems Rohan was sort of the platonic ideal of the Germanic/Anglo-Saxon/Norse “viking.” Very Wagner’s Ring Cycle type of depiction, which gets into this weird romanticization while also depicting the gods especially as petty and self-centered, and denigrating the women. Turning from that, this fictionalized “ideal,” to what we know of the actual culture at that time— we get into a lot of grey areas. Was Rohan a raiding culture? quite possibly, at their start; I think it’s a fair assumption to make, that Rohan had a history of raiding. Which seems to have stopped once they settled in the land gifted to them by Gondor.

now, is raiding… good? oh gods no. absolutely not. but while there was a lot of violence typical of raids, not every expedition ended in raids— or was spent *only* on raiding. Vikings would stop and make camps, would trade, even settle in areas long enough that we have archaeological evidence of Danish jewelry made out of Frankish materials. Much of “viking” culture is built off borrowing; we have mjolnir pendants as modern heathens because these people saw Christian crosses, went “oh, that’s cool, we should have something to signify our faith!” and started forging mjolnirs. They were often produced by the same smiths! Sold in the same areas!

So, so much of this culture was decentralized. There was no set religious doctrine, histories and myths were told orally— hence why Skalds were so important (and likely why Théoden was so willing to take Gríma back despite. Everything). My hearth cult is different from your hearth cult is different from the hearth cults the next village over. Stories change with the times, names are lost and added, our culture shifts with the land and her people. The iron-age Norse peoples had very positive relations with Arab traders, to the point that we have an extremely detailed description of the funeral of (what was very likely) a nobleman documented by Ibn Fadlan; they had silks and glassware because of these trade relationships.

so you’ve got a culture built on adapting and borrowing, on *growing,* which has now 1) settled in one area and does not seem to send forces beyond their borders anymore, despite having a specialized category of “riders” not unlike the specialized category of “vikings” and 2) has a positive but distant relationship with its more powerful and decidedly centralized neighbor (not unlike norsemen with the English/French). aaaaaaaaand then there’s Thengel.

now like I said in DMs the blame very much does NOT rest on Thengel. like yea he kickstarted the process but I think this was very much inevitable. Gondor has written histories, better resources, like not even getting into the blood bullshit they just have a much more stable culture. Even if Christianity hadn’t done. what Christianity does. 😑 Norse peoples were worshipping Jesus alongside Þórr. it was simply a matter of time.

and like I stated above, the idea of Rohirrim as lesser and inherently violent is so pervasive even Faramir who is held up as the paragon of grace and nobility in the books does not BEGIN to question it. you don’t leave an environment where everyone thinks you’re lesser than them BY NATURE thinking “wow that was great, nothing about that needed to change!!” — I don’t blame Thengel in the slightest for going “yeah okay nobody in my line is EVER going to look stupid in front of another Gondorian.”

but at the same time as Westron and Sindarin are brought into the noble households, there doesn’t seem to be any similar push to preserve Rohirric oral traditions. Hell, considering the state of things by the war of the ring and the need for Riders, there’s a non-zero chance Gríma may have been the last “Skald” in Meduseld— which quite honestly explains even Éomer’s hesitance to explicitly harm him.

not to mention ultimately royal culture will bleed out into common culture— and eventually royal/noble culture will be all that survives. we have more place names for Þórr and Týr because they were worshipped more widely by the common folk, but more surviving NARRATIVES of Óðinn because he was worshipped by nobility and their closest warriors. If the noble culture of Rohan has shifted to more closely imitate Gondor, then it’s only a matter of time before all that’s left of actual Rohirric culture is place names and folk beliefs

like, I’m saying this as a heathen who’s doing his best to reconstruct a faith based off of archaeological evidence of my ancestors and one (1) surviving text that could be considered religious. EVERYTHING ELSE that is widely available is CHRISTIAN RETELLINGS. whose accuracy is EXTREMELY DEBATABLE. I don’t even necessarily prescribe to what many people consider one of the KEY myths!!!! and while there was a lot of violence involved in the spread of Christianity, quite clearly it does not need to start or end that way. specifically while the Norse peoples, it started very benignly as an interest in the symbols and holy figures— and turned into “all heathens are stupid dirty bloodthirsty monsters, their faith is cruel and backwards and only we Christians have any moral standing”

(Gondorians becoming more and more like those violent middlemen………)

it’s this very pervasive perspective that even when not backed with outright violence on Gondor’s point, clearly leads to the idea that to receive any sort of respect as Men, the Rohirrim must divest of anything that denotes they ARE Rohirric and live instead by Gondor’s standards— the only way to receive salvation is to follow Christ, et cetera et cetera et cetera. I got proselytized to with a bunch of friends in a fucking Mexican restaurant this shit still happens. she compared Christ to gravity and my faith as ridiculous and idiotic (as idiotic as denying that gravity exists).

and that’s part of why I like. don’t find the Gondorian perspective very compelling? like Boromir specifically is interesting because he explicitly defends Rohan and seems to carry a lot of like. both this openness to other cultures for the most part and this sort of trauma around a very similar pressure to Be A Proper Gondorian Heir, depending on how you want to read him— like this intense need to prove himself and his people as worthy to Aragorn, particularly in the films, is veeeeeeeerryyyyyy interesting to consider. meanwhile Denethor is Denethor and book!Faramir has his whole “taming” thing which I cannot even remotely stand. film!Faramir was thankfully spared the weird bullshit prejudices

it does also kind of inherently get into the question of how much of that attitude is specific to Minas Tirith; Gondor’s fucking massive, what pockets of cultures are surviving in coastal towns and out in the more distant regions? because there will always be bleeding, like I said, but this sort of Christian-adjacent attitude that is absolutely held by Gondorian nobility could very well be just that… a NOBLE attitude. the folk of western Anórien probably had WAY more in common with the neighboring Rohirrim on the Eastfold than ANYONE in Minas Tirith.

anyways, was this coherent? barely. do I care? no. I have a head cold. sources? a lot of the same creators as I cited for that gender in Rohan post that I’ll track down and link if the gods decide to bless me with a functional search bar on this site for ONCE, and Children of Ash and Elm. I also mentioned Wagner. I can’t in good faith recommend reading Wagner.

noble Gondorians sit down and shut up about Rohan challenge

(Gríma ramblings under the cut)

[magicalyaku]

Thanks for joining me on this ride through 2022! When I started my reading spree in autumn 2021 I did not expect to find so much joy (and sometimes frustation) to motivate me to write hundreds of words about books every month. I read and write what I want and because I want to, but it's nice to know that sometimes there’s actually someone interested in what I have to say. So thank you for even the small interactions. :)

I had to edit this overview like five times because whenever I thought I was done I found another book I missed. So if I counted correctly I have read a total of 93 books (written and audio, not including manga, comics and non-fiction). That is ... a damn lot! Like 6 years combined compared to before. I also reread two of those books and while editing my novel I read it two whole times. That counts, right? (That’s why there’s 94 covers up there. Because i snuck it inbetween. Because I can. uAu) Only 14 of all these books I would categorise as non-queer. Funnily enough, 6 of those I didn’t like very much. Of the remaining 75 queer books I only found 1 book really bad and I’m picky about 2 more. Huh.

On to the award ceremony! (But don’t expect laudations. I wouldn’t shut up.)

Least favourite phrase:

... it smelled like boy.

(from: The Song that moves the Sun, Darius the Great (probably the 2nd) and the third time I already blocked from my mind (Here the Whole Time???)) That sentence came up fucking three times! Seriously. WHY?! I hate it. 8D

Favourite phrase:

But we have more important things to do than hook up.

(from: The Darkness Outside Us) I laughed so hard at this sentence. Finally someone who gets it! All stupid YA heroines should listen to this.

Favourite protagonists:

Jack Shannon (Aces Wild) and Neil Josten (All for the Game)!

Favourite covers:

Least favourite books:

A Far Wilder Magic (Allison Saft) and If You Change Your Mind (Robbie Weber)

Favourite books (no order):

The Darkness Outside Us (Eliot Schrefer)

Aces Wild: A Heist (Amanda DeWitt)

The City Beautiful (Aden Polydoros)

Every Bird a Prince (Jenn Reese)

All for the Game series: (Nora Sacavic)

I Wish You All the Best (Mason Deaver)

I Hope You Get this Message (Farah Naz Rishi)

More books I greatly enjoyed:

Both can be true (Jules Machias)

A Taste of Gold and Iron (Alexandra Rowland)

The Language of Seabirds (Will Taylor)

A Complicated Love Story Set in Space (Shaun David Hutchinson)

At the Edge of the Universe (Shaun David Hutchinson)

Milo and Marcos at the End of the World (Kevin Christopher Snipes)

Little Black Bird (Anna Kirchner)

The Girl Who Fell Beneath the Sea (Axie Oh)

In Deeper Waters (F.T. Lukens)

So this is Ever After (F.T. Lukens)

All that’s Left in the World (Erik J. Brown)

.... aaaand many many more! uAu

Bonus!

At the half year point I actually counted how often the protagonists names were being used throughout those different books. I felt to lazy do to it in detail for the second half, but I can still present you my preliminery count of most used names for the protagonist, love interest and possibly best friend. These came up at least 3 times!

Will/William

Matt

Nate/Nathan

Andrew/Drew

Daniel

Lame, right? 8D My favourite name choice award goes to Rosemary and Rowan from Mirrored in Evergreen by B. Pigeon!

That’s it! Phew! Thanks the universe for books! :D

[fireandiceland]

you mentioned in the tags that you like austrias portrayal, any particular reason why? i ask with best intentions possible since i always look forward to his canon appearances and i’m really curious how an austrian feels about him. that’s if you’re up for it though lol.

Hey, it’s completely fine to ask this. I think I’ve gotten asks about how I feel about him as a character before lol

First of all I think aph Austria aka Roderich really captures that mentality of always complaining before thinking further. I don’t know why but we don’t just accept something, there needs to be complaining first and then there’s a high chance it will be accepted without any or only minor changes. But agreeing to something without calling it unnecessary and or giving in without questioning the purpose behind it all (even if there’s no actual explanation desired) is something I can easily identify with as an Austrian. 😅

It’s canon that Roderich’s state of health is party dependent on how Germany (I think mostly his economy) is doing. I’m not sure I’m how far that transfers to real life, I guess as an EU member we’re kinda dependent on the strength of every other member, but what is true is that Austria often seems to see what Germany is doing before doing it ourselves. Like the Pfandsystem for plastic bottles and cans. This is also the reason why we’re still waiting what our government is going to do when Germany legalises marijuana cause now they say no we won’t do that but we know how it was with other things lol 👀

Back to the topic: cake! Austria is seen enjoying cake quite a few times in the manga and in the anime too! My family often has cake in the afternoon when guests are over or sometimes even for breakfast on weekends when there’s some leftovers from a party or whatever. Having a piece of afternoon cake with a cup of coffee or tea is something very casual to me, like we do it so often it’s not for special occasions. It can be a random Tuesday and my grandma has a Sachertorte at the ready 😇

Also that thing about walking slowly 😩 as someone who has inhabited the Gay Walk (ya know that thing where people in the lgbt+ community are said to walk fast for some reason) I am suffering in big crowds cause people are so fucking slow. But adding onto this I think especially in the mountains people have a high endurance, going hiking or just walking longer distances so we might be a nation of slow walkers but we don’t get tired that easily (at least that’s not something I’ve observed in my circle. My friends and I are just lazy and we can admit that.)

I just churned this out in one go right after waking up cause I felt like it so I might add more later if I can think of sth but thank you for the ask and I hope this gives a brief view of why I personally feel like he’s a good representation of the Austrian mentality (or at least the stereotypical one lol) 😉