#I’m aware how sensitive this topic is

[that-one-enby-possum]

Discussions of unwanted weight loss v

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Okay I’m posting this then going to bed but I can’t get google’s help so to tumblr I turn

The problem: I’m losing weight rapidly, burning more cal in a day than I can consume (often under 300-400, sometimes even 200) and I can’t find a good way to fix this. My watch helpfully informs me I’m burning far more than that. Thanks, Fitbit! Really easing my anxiety there, great job.

Whenever I google for help google just tells me ways to lose even more weight, even if I put in ‘how to gain weight’ and ‘foods to promote weight gain.’ I have little to no appetite, which is why I’m unable to eat much, and I’m also nauseous very often.

So my plea is this: What are some healthy and calorie dense food options that won’t take much time to eat? Are there any drinks that could help? Drinking stuff is always easier for me, maybe a juice or smth. It’s why I currently survive of smoothies and protein shakes.

It’s worth mentioning this is not intentional weight loss. It’s (side-effect) medication induced. I’m at a healthy weight now, but it’s still dropping. Since the start I’ve dropped over 70-80 pounds- (thank the gods I was overweight then because I don’t want to think what could have happened to me if I didn’t have fat to spare. I could have died and that’s not off the damn table if I don’t fix this fast.) Please, if you have any ideas, I’m getting a bit desperate and a little afraid. Thanks for reading.

[astroismypassion]

Astrology observations 🖼 🖼 🖼

Credit my Tumblr blog @astroismypassion

🖼 Pisces Sun and Sun in the 12th people often have a partner that works behind the scenes in some manner. For example: a musician who doesn’t perform, but is a song writer, a person who works in the theatre, but doesn’t perform on stage.

🖼 Often times when there is 8th house Synastry, there is a higher chance of same sign Ascendant and Sun. One is Leo Sun, the other Leo Rising. The second one is same degree or house Sun sign. For example: one is Capricorn Sun and the other is Sun in the 10th house. Or both have Sun at a Virgo degree. Usually there is a similarity in personality, that’s why there can be an ego clash or both acting in similar manner. For example: both extremely sensitive, both stubborn, both moody, both leaders. The third one I found was having opposite Moon signs, one Leo Moon, the other Aquarius Moon. Or Sun opposition Moon, such as one is Taurus Sun and the other person is Scorpio Moon.

🖼 On a side note, I found the day/number you’re born on, helps with who you find the most attractive in life or who you navigate towards. Like people born on the 3th looove Gemini Sun people I noticed. A person born on the 2nd likes Taurus Suns.

🖼 This is more an astrology note, but I was not aware all these years that Rihanna and Chris Brown too had 8th house Synastry? He was Pisces over the 8th house and she’s a Pisces Sun. No wonder, she went back to him after assault, only 8th house connection has you doing that. So far I noticed Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Quavo and Saweetie, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez, Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus, Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady, Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield had 8th house Synastry.

🖼 There is often a backlash or criticism about Libra Chiron native on who they are hanging with or in a partnership with. These people often are either single for a very long time due to being picky and having high standards for themselves or they “date below them”. These natives really struggle to date an equal. Often people around Libra Chiron don’t like the person Libra Chiron is dating.

🖼 On the topic of one’s Sun conjunction the other’s Moon being often highly regarded in marriage or partnership, I honestly found you either end up having a family or a child with your Moon sign person or it’s a person you dated when younger, somewhere in the period between teenage years and below your 30s. Literally I see no inbetween in real life. Or you were roommates/lived together at some point with them. I’m talking about if you are Aries Moon, then this could apply for a partnership with Aries Sun person.

🖼 I know 3rd house, 6th house is praised for wellness, but often I noticed Gemini/Virgo Suns, Mercury in the 5th house and Sun in the 3rd/6th house procrastinate on working out or not taking it seriously.

🖼 It’s funny how each person you end up dating has the signs of your Venus sign, house, aspects and degree, because it literally indicates the person you attract in your life. For example: you have Taurus Sun in the 6th house at 22 (Capricorn) degrees, your person could have Sun in the 10th house, Sun conjunction Venus, Sun at a Virgo degree in their chart. And usually it’s different partners you end up dating, but all have similar placement. So it’s like you end up dating different versions of the same person.

🖼 One sign that is even more prone to bloating than an average person (even when eating very little or just drinking water) is Virgo Lilith. These poor natives often struggle with bloating and issues relating to it.

🖼 I noticed Taurus Venus and Libra Venus often have more than enough food for themselves and others. And people just randomly give them food or share it with them often. Like even when this people might not have the money they want, they are overabundant in food. 😄

🖼 If you have Pisces over the 9th house or Neptune in the 9th house you should definitely vacation on an island or travel where there is a forest, a resort, a pool or a sauna.

🖼 One good tip for Virgo Moon or Virgo Venus/Venus in the 6th house when it comes to managing sweet tooth is if you don’t feel on the inside at ease eating it, it’s probably not that great for your overall wellbeing. Because you guys get irritated when you don’t nourish yourselves properly. I noticed this people genuinely glow when they put healthier, more organic versions of snacks in their body. It doesn’t have to being anything extra healthy, just not completely artificial.

🖼 If you have Composite Scorpio Ascendant, you two probably met on a cloudy/cold/rainy/foggy day.

🖼 Pisces IC/Pisces over the 4th house/Neptune in the 4th house people often get blamed for whatever wrong is going on in the family. So they are compensating with their escapist tendencies to not feel guilt or shame about it.

🖼 It’s underrated how Sun square Saturn or any square Saturn transit is challenging and tough. You literally get so challenged on how you live, your beliefs, outlook on life and it’s truly a reality check.

🖼 Solar Return chart is great to look into your life a year ahead. But Lunar Return chart is excellent to see it for roughly a month.

🖼 I would keep a high-quality connection with my sibling, if I were to have Scorpio Mercury. Usually these people enter adulthood, enter post-marriage life and start hating on their sibling, even if close in younger years. What happens to you is often in their hands and they can last minute “save” you. It’s best not to say something too quickly and too brash to your sibling, because they will remember those words. You are likely to have arguments over parent’s inheritance too.

🖼 It might go against the grain, but I noticed people choose their profession mostly based on their Moon sign. That’s why you also see Scorpio Moons often struggling to settle on a career, being pulled in so many directions.

🖼 Mars sign often shows people you lust over. But I noticed it works more if it’s not in a cerebral sign. Like if you have Sagittarius Mars or Mars in the 9th house, you might not necessarily find Sagittarius Sun people that physically attractive.

🖼 Saturn in the 3rd house people usually find a job in a different city than home town.

🖼 When it comes to celebrities, you may relate to people who share the same signs over houses that you have in your own Natal chart.

🖼 Pisces Moon can be too arrogant to learn from their past mistakes.

🖼 Venus square Neptune people often desire to return to a past lover (even if many times) in order to try to get better results or wanting to “make it right at least once”. So they can end up being in a cycle or repeating pattern trying to prove that there was love there after all.

🖼 With Composite Sun in the 10th house or Sun at a Capricorn degree (10, 22) it’s close to impossible to hiding anything in this duo from the public eye, parents.

🖼 Whenever someone’s Sun conjuncts the other’s Vertex the connection doesn’t go how you want it to go. Sun person can also “reject” Vertex person in some way, resulting in a fated event.

Credit my Tumblr blog @astroismypassion

[gb-patch]

GB Patch Games: Sensitivity Reader Update

Okay, well I am able to make another statement before Rose does. I can now explain much more easily why I didn’t fire Rose. There’s been new developments with the leakers. The people behind this have doxed Rose’s discord account (please don’t go looking for it) and also shared a screenshot of an email that was sent to my support address months ago. They believe that incriminates us somehow, but really all it’s done is shown in broad daylight what they were doing and why I was defending Rose so much. If I had brought up that email as a connection to this myself people understandably would’ve thought I was making a conspiracy.

However, it is out now. Here is the story- a few months ago someone who wanted to remain anonymous sent me an email with a screenshot where Rose called me a cracker. And I told them I appreciated the concern but it’s alright, was there evidence of Rose being unkind to players? They had nothing. No response.

As an aside, yes, I have been aware for a long time that Rose uses crude language when talking about me. That doesn’t mean I’ve hidden how evil they were from players. It means I’m allowed to choose what I’m comfortable with. That original “reveal” didn’t shock or upset me in any way. Our Life is a sensitive, wholesome game, but I’m a full-grown adult. I’m not innocent or pure. The game I released before OL is XOXO Blood Droplets. Something I wrote and released to the public is full of crude jokes, curse words, and violence. It’s cartoonish and comical, but edgy. Rose themselves likes to BS with bad words and I’m not accepting abuse because I think getting called a pussy is funny. I know Rose doesn’t hate me or wish me any harm. Rose also isn’t causing “discourse” for me and my games on purpose, they were joking that bringing up serious topics is “discourse” to some people. Ironically, the leakers who did this are trying to make some “discourse” on purpose.

Regardless, I initially thought that email was from someone earnestly worried for me and that they moved on when it was clear I was fine. But that’s not what happened. Them and at least one other person have been waiting for months to bring this up again. They went through almost a year’s worth of Rose’s private posts to collect as many unflattering screenshots as they could, and then they didn’t send them to me. They posted them publicly. I had a suspicion from the get go that it was the same person/people from before who couldn’t prove anything to me in private. And if true, how horrible is it that a bunch of the comments they shared were crude language towards me, something they already knew I’d brush off as nothing. They decided for me that it was wrong and they wanted the rest of the players to do the same. Or even less charitably, those extra posts were simply there to make Rose look as bad and untrustworthy as possible and they didn’t care that I was comfortable with it. I could not explain everything we were thinking/feeling at first, but behind the scenes we were discussing how this was personally motivated and not a knee-jerk act without forethought. And we do know for certain at least the main people involved now, and they do have personal issues with Rose.

Also, if you still believe that they just wanted to help the game at any length because Rose is that huge of a risk, showing that email and framing something innocuous about me (not fainting at the word “cracker” and politely being open to more proof) as serious “evidence of wrongdoing” at GB Patch Games makes me believe they want to smear Rose so bad they’ll try to turn players against me as well. Plus, the post is framed as “this email was anonymously sent to me”, but we know from account details that the people who could’ve gotten those screenshots of the discord and email are the same people who sent that email and started this situation, which is embarrassing. I’ve confirmed the screenshots shared in the email to me and the original public post came from the same private, “venting-safe” discord server. There’s very few people in there. We know it’s still you and not a separate source. I can’t prove they think I’m stupid or in their way, but I can’t see how anything they’re doing is trying to be beneficial to the creation of OL: NF. They told me in the email they’d give me more evidence if I requested it and I was ready to know, but instead they went silent for months and then did this.

I want it to be clear that this doesn’t mean players can’t wonder if Rose has enough experience to be a sensitivity reader right now, or to worry they’re so invested in the game that it’s going to effect how objective they are with their feedback, or to say that Rose is flawless and has never done anything hurtful. However, I hope you can understand why I was on Rose’s side and couldn’t just fire them over this. It felt so incredibly unfair. If another person tries to get their way by doing this in the future, I will not hail them as a hero and immediately fire at the target. And I don't tolerate any racial harassment of any kind to anyone on my team.

If those people want to continue to share Rose’s private posts in retaliation, you can fuck off. If you somehow reveal now that Rose is secretly a murderer, I’m not gonna apologize and say I was so wrong about you. If you had tons of evidence of Rose being horrible to players, you should’ve sent it all to me and with full context to begin with in the email like you offered to do. I just don’t understand.

Any players who like to see someone’s least flattering points portrayed in the worst possible way and continue flocking to the leaks as fandom drama, I don’t want you in this fandom. I don’t want you to enjoy my games.

Anyone who has been truly hurt by this and are left confused and angry, I do completely understand that. I didn’t know how to handle this, and it made a lot of people not know how to keep trusting me. I am still looking into getting a community manager to help me better communicate with players, especially when something serious happens. And I’ll always be around for you to reach out to if you have doubts about anything.

[kazumist]

THROUGH THICK AND THIN .ᐟ

✩ — in which soshiro had forgotten the lengths of your love for him.

✩ — request: hi, can i pls request an argument with hoshina and how u resolve everything 🥹🥹🥹

✩ — includes: hoshina soshiro x gn!reader. hurt/comfort, angst if u squint. cw: arguments, implications of soshiro being injured but thats just it, soshiro is kinda mean Uhm, ooc!hoshina this is another experimental fic help me. wc: 1440. reblogs and feedback are much appreciated !!

if there was one thing sharper than the blades hoshina soshiro wielded, it would be the words that escaped his lips.

hoshina knows how to sugarcoat his words. he considers himself a good talker—negiotiator, if you would. however, when it comes to more sensitive topics, that’s when it all starts to crumble down. 

he never expected for him to catch feelings, especially with the line of work he takes. it’s too risky. dangerous. worrying. but he fell as deep as the ocean could get for you. you accepted it. him and his line of work. him as a whole.

yet soshiro seems to forget that sometimes.

getting out of a mission unscathed was impossible. he would always have at least one injury planted on him. it was a repetitive game of russian roulette where either his injuries would be severe or light. and unfortunately for him, today was sadly the former. 

a knock was heard at the door of the hospital room he’s staying in. a mission had recently just finished—about three days had passed, and soshiro was unconscious for the first two due to how he overexerted himself. “come in,” he says. and to his surprise, he saw you opening the door.

soshiro hasn’t told you about him being hospitalized yet—so how?

“captain ashiro told me.” oh. so that’s how. well, he was aware that you had also built a friendship with his commander. and that was completely fine with him. it was awkward when you walked over to the bed, pulling out the chair for you to sit on. you refused to make eye contact with him while soshiro just stared at you.

neither of you has an idea of what to say.

“i wish you told me as soon as you woke up. i was worried sick when i heard the news about the kaiju attack and all.” you said, keeping your gaze focused on your fingers as they played with each other. he flinches slightly as guilt starts to bubble up inside of him. it was already five in the afternoon and he’s been awake since ten in the morning. he wishes that he told you as soon as he woke up as well.

however, there’s one thing that has started to creep onto soshiro lately—fear. insecurity, perhaps. he gets haunted by the thought that you would definitely be happier in someone else’s arms and that you would be more happy being bathed in someone else’s affection. being with a man like hoshina soshiro was dangerous, as if it were a gamble to play.

because you never know if you’ll still wake up to him being alive the next day. and believe it or not: hoshina was scared—terrified of that possibility. he doesn’t want you to be sad, he crumbles at the thought of you crying in the first place. so he made it a task for him to push you away. to be distant.

to be someone you would hate.

that’s the only way he could keep you safe.

“sorry. i didn’t want to disturb you.” bullshit.

“why…” you trailed off. soshiro noticed that you werent playing with your fingers anymore and that you were now clenching your fists. “why would you think that? soshiro, your health matters to me.” his heart also clenched when he heard the slight crack in your voice. “why would it matter to you? i could die any day.”

“are you being serious right now?” he hates it. he hates the way that the first time he saw your eyes today, they were filled with such negative emotions. anger. hurt. confusion. “do i look like i’m kidding?”

“soshiro, why are you acting like this? did i do something wrong? i know we haven’t seen each other a lot because we’ve been both busy.” no, you didn’t. this is my fault, but this is also for the best. is what he wanted to say—but he just swallows up his words. “it’s nothing.”

“no, it’s not just ‘nothing.’ tell me what’s wrong, please? so we can fix it. it pains me when we’re like this.” it pains him too—it pains him so fucking bad. but hoshina soshiro is stubborn. so he will find himself accomplishing his task, whether it pains him or not.

because all he wants is the best for you, even if he wouldn’t be able to provide that.

— — — — — — — — 

he doesn’t know how things got so heated between the two of you. and he’s sure that you both might disturb the other patients who are confined in the room next to his.

“why won’t you just tell me what’s wrong? i feel like an idiot, soshiro! what am i?! some fucking mind reader on what goes on inside your head?!”

“like i told you, it’s nothing for you to worry about! what can’t you understand with that?!”

“what can’t you understand with me saying it’s not just nothing?!”

“and what can’t you understand with me implying that you shouldn’t care anymore?! dp i have to spell it out for you?”

you weren’t sitting down anymore, and hoshina doesn’t dare to speak anymore. fighting with you was the worst. and this time, he fucked up real bad. “i… it’s getting late. i should get going.” you say, and soshiro could feel a part of him shattering when he heard you hold back a sob.

the next time soshiro saw you, he was on his day off (a day off he didn’t really want to take but captain ashiro forced him otherwise since the doctors told him he shouldn’t be making his body engage in strenuous activities just yet). and the first thing he did? he visited you. he knew you get off work early on fridays, making you free for the rest of the weekend earlier.

he knocks on your door, although hesitantly. he’s nervous as he waits for you to open the door.

and he’s grateful that you still opened the door for him in spite of your last conversation with each other. you didn’t say anything as you opened the door further, inviting him in. the awkwardness gave hoshina a rush of deja vu about the awkwardness in the hospital room.

“i’m sorry.” although these two words don’t just cut it so easily, he thinks.

“do you really mean it? what you said in the hospital?”

his breath hitched as he found the right words to say. if hoshina was going to be honest, he hasn’t thought much about what to do at this point. surely, he had achieved his goal that night, right? “yeah.”

“liar.”

he turns to you immediately, and you were already looking at him to begin with. “you’re lying, and i could tell that because you’re nibbling on your lip. you always do that when you lie. just tell me the truth, soshiro, please.”

why should he? would you accept his reason? would you accept the insecurities that haunt his every waking thought? would you accept him even though he said such mean things to you the last time you saw each other?

would you still love him despite it all?

you would. you always would. 

and so he explains from the very start—when and where these thoughts started in the first place. and you listen to him intently, absorbing every single detail he says. once he was done, you took a deep breath. 

“god, you’re so stupid. did you know that?” soshiro lets out a weak chuckle at that, avoiding your gaze. you cup his face with your hands, making him face you. “look at me,” he refuses. “soshiro, look at me.” he then complies, slowly trailing his eyes across your features before resting them on your gaze.

“you don’t get to decide what’s best for me when it comes to this type of thing, okay? i love who i want to love. you don’t get to decide that i’d be happier with someone else. because i love you. i love you more than you could ever imagine, more than you could ever feel. remember that. engrave that inside your mind so you can never forget. you are the one i am helplessly in love with, soshiro.”

i love you. i love you. i love you. it repeats inside his mind. you are the one i am helplessly in love with. it echoes. soshiro feels stupid for attempting to become someone you hated in the first place. there was no way he could ever bear the possibility of you actually hating him.

how could he forget? you had already accepted him as a whole. through thick and thin, you will stand by his side.

[sophiebaek]

Portraying Sophie Baek:

A guide to cultural sensitivity and respect

Things to keep in mind

———

Yay! Sophie Baek is finally here and with all of excitement of this casting, I think it’s also important to bring attention to the new intersectionality that comes with the character of Sophie (specifically show Sophie).

Why should you take my words into account? Well, as an Asian woman in society today, I feel that I am qualified to speak on this topic since I’ve experienced all of this.

All of my words come from kind intentions, and I purely just want to communicate to the fandom how to approach Sophie being Asian in a respectful way.

Asia is a gigantic continent filled with various countries that have a multitude of cultures and ethnicities. While on the surface they all seem similar, they each have their own customs and traditions that have meaning within our culture. Do not combine them.

It’s important to remember that not every Asian person is Chinese, Japanese or Korean (East asian).

With Sophie being Korean, please do not generalize when writing about what you think you know about Korean culture.

You like Kpop and Kdrama? Great! BUT that does not define what Korean culture is and you shouldn't use that content as a reference.

When writing, be aware of explicit and unconscious biases you have about Asian people.

Asian stereotypes (Model Minority, Dragon Lady, Lotus blossom, etc) are very harmful and spread false narratives about us. Stereotypes eliminate the dimensions of who we are as Asians (South, South East, East, North, West).

Please, please, please do not fetishize. Especially since Bridgerton is a romance series it's extremely important to be mindful of the scenarios you put in your fics.

This also includes the White Savior Complex we see a lot in media!

If you’re writing about something specific, research it and fully understand the content you are putting into your work. Feel a little iffy about if you should put it in your fic? Probably don’t then. It’s that easy!

It's always great to ask someone who is a part of the community as well to see if what you're writing about is appropriate or potentially offensive in any way.

Describing Sophie is something new as well. Be mindful on how you describe her and other Asian characters.

Let me be clear: descriptions like 'slanted eyes' or 'yellow skin' are harmful

Here are some great resources that go into further detail about specific things! Rather than me paraphrasing their words it's best to link the direct source. Even as a part of this community, these articles were a reminder of how I must keep myself in check as well!

Describing Asian Eyes

Some important tips on making/writing Asian OCs

writing east asian characters

The Depiction of Asian Characters - Book Edition

The Dragon Lady, the Lotus Blossom, and the Robot: Archetypes of Asian Women in Western Media

To wrap this up, I want to be clear that I’m not a professional on this topic, but as someone who has been affected by harmful portrayals in media, I feel compelled to share my perspective. My hope is to spread awareness and encourage others to be mindful of how they approach these subjects, especially if they may not be fully informed. It’s about showing respect, doing the necessary research, and recognizing the impact our words and content can have on real people and cultures. By staying educated and considerate, we can be more aware and thoughtful in our actions.

[tune-on-in-folks]

Day 10! This prompt is CNC/Dub-Con/Non-con, so sensitive topic. Vox doesn't explicitly ask for Reader's permission.

I struggled with this prompt, but hey I did write something!

Tags/Warnings: CNC, dub-con, non-con, top Vox, desk sex, fingering, p in v sex, fem!reader Word Count: 2,060

There was a long list of reasons why Vox could be upset. From Alastor to Valentino, to something not going as planned. You were used to Vox’s volatile moods, watching him swing from one to the next. He could go from berating the incompetence of a lowly worker, threatening them with being Valentino’s target practice, one minute; To charming the public with his suave personality and handsome smile, in the next. It was enough to give you whiplash.

Luckily for you, you had never been on the receiving end of his frustrations. You were careful, almost to an anxious degree. You ensured that everything you presented Vox with was top notch, not a word mistyped, or a single smudge of ink. In turn you never got yelled at or talked down to. Which was nice…You adored your boss, admired him. Wanted to stay on his good side, and the occasional wet dream of him was something you ignored. After all, it was Vox, who hadn’t fantasized about him?

Unfortunately today, you were a mess, distracted and bumbling. Everything seemed to be going wrong, but that was okay, you could handle it with grace. What you couldn't handle was the fact that your incompetence was directly affecting your boss. Enough so, that he personally came to your office to demand an explanation.

The door opened, catching your attention as you tried to get your computer to stop freaking out.

“One moment!” You call, muttering curses under your breath about the incompetence of your VoxTek issued laptop.

You hadn't realized that it was your boss who had entered, or you would have dropped your task immediately. And you certainly would not have been cursing out the computer he had designed.

“Stupid piece of shit!” You curse loudly, slamming the laptop shut.

This brought you face to face with Vox who quirked an unamused eyebrow at your outburst. You felt the blood drain from your face.

“Oh. Um, S-sir! What can I help you with?” You stammer, aware of how unprofessional your display was.

He held up the report you had sent up an hour ago. “What is this crap?” He asks, sounding exasperated.

You blink, your heart dropping at the sight of it. “I..ah, well it's my latest report.”

“Uh-huh.” He prompts, “and it's utter crap. So you should?”

You swallow. “Rewrite it, I know.”

You opened your laptop back up, pressing the power button. Only for it not to power on. You held the button down again, a groan of frustration slipping from you.

“And I would, if my computer didn't just fucking die on me.” You sigh, gently closing it as you meet Vox's gaze again. “I'm sorry, Sir.”

He clicks his tongue, entering into your office further, slamming the report down on your desk. “Unfortunately, sorry isn't going to cut it, Dollface. Your report was lackluster, forcing me to improvise in a very important meeting.”

You swallow nervously, anxiety blooming in your chest. You open your mouth to apologize again, but Vox quickly grabs hold of your chin, closing your mouth.

“You’re going to make this up to me, got it? And if I hear another “I’m sorry” from you, I'll make sure that your mouth is put to better use.”

You swallow hard, blush settling on your face at his words. You could only imagine what he had meant with his threat. 

“I-I'm sorry?” You ask, wanting clarification, not for one second interpreting that the words were also another apology. 

At the quirk of his eyebrow you realize what you'd said, “Shit! I mean- fuck! Clarify?”

He chuckles darkly, standing up to his full towering height. Vox comes around your desk, pulling you up from your chair.

“I mean…that I will fuck that pretty little mouth of yours if you apologize one more time.”

Your face flushed with even more heat, you had thought that was what he meant, but to hear him actually say it? A slight amount of panic ran through you, tinged with a warmth that settled in your core. “I uh…didn't mean to say it again.”

“I'm sure you didn't.” Vox muses, a wicked glint in his eyes. “But you still need to pay for your report… and a new computer.”

“A new computer?” You echo softly, brows furrowed in confusion.

You watch as Vox turns to your desk, sweeping everything off, including your laptop.

“Vox!” You yell in surprise, gasping as he grabs your hand.

He pulls you to him, bending you over your desk and pulling up your skirt. Your eyes widen with panic as you try to sit up, only for him to press you back down. His hand trails up the back of your thigh to your panties, the sensation causing you to shiver.

“Lucky for you, I’ll let that last apology slide.” He says softly, his fingers hooking in the waistband of your panties.

“S-sir?” You ask hesitantly, trepidation in your voice, mixing with arousal. “What are you doing?”

Vox presses his chest against your back, sliding your panties down your legs. “I’m collecting my dues. Now, say my name again, doll. I want to hear you say it.”

You take a deep breath, your voice wavering. “V-Vox.” 

Why were you following his commands? He hadn’t asked your permission one bit, taking advantage of you.

“Atta girl.” He chuckles, his fingers finding your clit.

You gasp at the contact, a moan spilling from your lips as he rubs tight circles into the sensitive nub. You weren't doing anything to stop him, you wondered if you wanted to stop him. You bite your bottom lip, hands coming to grasp the edge of the desk as he slipped two fingers inside your sopping cunt. You cried out at the sensation, your eyes fluttering as he began to finger you. You knew if you wanted to stop him you would have, and you truly didn’t want him to stop. Your body betrayed your arousal, showing Vox just how much you wanted him to keep going.

“So wet for me.” His voice is full of lust and desire. “you know it's taken everything in me to wait to fuck you? Unfortunately, I can't wait anymore, babydoll.”

You whine, rolling your hips back against his fingers “W-what?” You ask, confusion biting through your arousal.

You never thought any of your fantasies about Vox would come to light. Yet here you were, pressed against your own desk, getting fingered by him. You couldn’t find it in yourself to ask him to stop, to point out that he was your boss. That he shouldn’t be doing this.

He speeds up his pace, the wet sounds of your cunt filling the air. “I've seen the way you look at me, doll. And I won't deny that I've thought about it. Thought about you.”

Your walls clench around his fingers, your eyes shutting tight. You hear the clinking of his belt behind him, the unzipping of his pants. You moan softly, trying to keep quiet. He was really going to fuck you, you realize. The thought sends a thrill through you, the idea of him fucking you just made you more aroused.

“Vox.” You moan, breath coming in short gasps.

“That’s right babydoll, say my name. I love when you say my name, it makes me so hard.” He murmurs, his voice right in your ear.

“F-fuck!” You gasp, not having expected those words to turn you on as much as they did.

“Let go for me doll, cum for me.”

You whine at his words, your release sneaking up on you. You moan loudly, cumming around his fingers. When your walls stopped twitching, he pulled his fingers from you. You were left feeling empty, wanting.

“Please.” You whimper, feeling his cock-head pressing against your entrance a moment later.

Vox hums, his hands grasping your hips as he runs his cock through your slick, “Please?” He asks, “Please what?”

“Fuck…” You whine, glancing over your shoulder at him. “Please-”

He thrust forward, his cock sliding half-way inside you, your own moans cutting you off from whatever you were going to say. He watches you as he begins to press the rest of his cock inside you. You whimper, your body trying to pull away from him with how deep he pressed inside you. He felt big, impossibly big.

“Too much.” You gasp, trying and failing to pull away from him. “Vox, you’re too big!”

He chuckles darkly, “Oh darling, I’m perfectly proportioned.”

He thrust forward again, his cock-head pressing against your cervix, causing you to cry out.

“And you will take all of me.” He whispers, pressing further in until you feel like you can’t take anything more.

Vox groans, his face pressing against your shoulder as he bottoms out. He begins to pull from your weeping cunt slowly, until just the head of his cock was inside you. Vox thrust forward, snapping his hips back into you. You gasp, the pain from his thrust blooming into pleasure. He felt too big and not big enough all at once. Everytime he pulled from your cunt you missed the feeling of him being buried inside you. But when he was inside you, it felt like too much. Vox shifted slightly, angling his cock deeper as he began to pick up his pace. Your office was filled with the obscene noises of him fucking you, hard and fast. You were faintly aware that anyone passing by would be able to hear.

“Vox!” You moan, his hips slapping against your bare ass. “Oh, fuck…”

One of his hands moves from your hip, slipping down to rub at your clit. “Fuck you feel sinful, so tight and perfect, like this cunt was made for me.” He mutters. 

Your body shuddered with the pure pleasure you were feeling. Every sharp snap of his hips planted seeds of pain that quickly bloomed into pure pleasure. His finger rubbing small, fast circles around your clit had your walls squeezing his cock in a vice-like grip. You were so close to your release, it was almost painful.

“Fucck!” Vox gasped, his voice glitching as he pressed into you, past your fluttering muscles. “Cum for me, babydoll, let me feel you cum around my cock.”

You moan, a second release crashing over your body for him. It was like your body was his at this point, following his every command without hesitation. Vox’s pace faltered, his breaths coming heavier.

“Fuck, I’m going to cum inside your tight little pussy, fill you up.” He growled, “Make you mine.”

You couldn’t do much else but whimper, your body on fire with how sensitive you were. Vox managed only a few more thrusts before slamming his cock as deep as he could go, his seed filling you. You moaned lowly, the sensation of your boss cumming inside you, sending you tumbling into a final release. Your walls squeezed around his cock, milking him for every drop he had to give you.

“Fuck, babydoll.” Vox gasped, slowly pulling his cock from you.

He chuckled at you whining at the loss of him, admiring how his seed leaked from your cunt, the sight made his cock twitch again. You tried to press yourself up onto your arms, but they quickly gave out from beneath you. Vox leaned forward, reaching for your panties that hung loosely around your knees. He pulled them up, patting your cunt through them, making you gasp and moan at the sensation. He pulled your skirt back down, covering your ass, before he helped you up off your desk. He turned you to face him, holding you in his arms, his softening cock pressing against your stomach.

“I’ll ensure you have a new laptop sent to your office tomorrow.” He says softly, making sure you could stand on your own before tucking himself away.

You nod, slightly dazed. “R-Right. I’ll rewrite that report tomorrow then.”

Vox heads to the door, pausing before leaving, “Don’t bother. Just ensure the next is better. Oh and y/n?”

You glance up, surprised he had used your name. “Yes, sir?”

“I’ll see you tonight, I’m not done with you yet. And use my name, you deserve to after taking my cock so well.”

You flush in embarrassment, watching Vox leave your office with a promise that you knew he intended to keep.

[weepingwillowwonder]

#10 Hazbin Hotel "Things I ✨️LOVE✨️ the idea of..." (because I can't share these things with people irl...)

[Minors DNI! 🔞] -> -> ->

Rosie x reader x Alastor

CW: Humiliation, Oral sex, Sex toys, Reader on display?, Teasing, Sub!Reader

Rosie and Alastor have tea time with Rosie's new "assistant"

---

“Oh Alastor, I’m so glad you were able to come by!” Rosie exclaims, putting a friendly hand on his shoulder. “It’s been much too long! Come in, come in!” She brings the guest into the secluded tea room, gesturing to him to take a seat across from her. Alastor nods in agreement with a pondering look on his face, his usual smile seeming genuine to be in the presence of a good friend. “I suppose it has been quite a while...” He trails off as you come into the room with a tray of refreshments. 

While his usual grin reflects no emotions, the slight narrowing of Alastors eyes is the only indication he shows of a reaction of your presence. “Ah, what a wonderful job, dear! Very nice, well done!” Rosie’s hands clasp together in her lap as you arrange the various delicacies and beverages on table for the two overlords. You give her a small smile at her praise and step away to put the remaining tray in the kitchen.

In your brief absence, Alasor wordlessly looks to Rosie with an eyebrow raised questionably. During their past gatherings it was rare to have another person involved, much less someone who didn’t really fit the description of someone who lived in Cannibal town. He had found it strange that he had never seen you before, even more so that Rosie had not mentioned you until now. 

“I know what you’re thinking,” she looks back at him and offers him a sly look. When you come back to the table she introduces you both, “This is my… newest assistant.” She grins as she brings her teacup to her lips, amused by your flustered expression. “You know how being an overlord can be sometimes,” with her free hand she wiggles her fingers playfully. “ It's useful to have someone to help relieve that stress.” 

Alastor easily picks up the innuendo in her tone, although he’s not exactly sure what she means by ‘assistant.’ When your name rolls off his tongue, your breath catches. Of course you’d heard of the radio demon and his history prior to this interaction. Even before Rosie mentioned their close nature, you were well aware of the horror stories that gave him his notable reputation. 

“Pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure!” He offers you his hand, in which you return the gesture, timidly shaking it. Your eyes flicker to Rosie when you let go of his hand, watching as she discreetly pulls a tiny black controller from her pocket. She doesn’t acknowledge that you are watching her, immediately going into conversation to catch up with her friend. 

After waiting for sometime in anticipation, you finally relax. Bringing your glass of water to your lips, you follow along with the lighthearted discussion, occasionally nodding in agreement on a particular topic. A sudden humming between your legs makes you jerk slightly, spilling some of the contents from your cup into your lap. The gasp that escapes you from the stimulation, easily could have been disguised as surprise by the cold liquid seeping through your clothes. 

Rosie feigns her shock by your outburst and reaches over to pat your lap with a napkin. “Darling, you really ought to be more careful!” Her motions disguised as an attempt to clean you up, were teasingly stroking the tops of your thighs, dangerously close to the sensitive area between your legs. You hold your breath, hoping that you were hidden by the tablecloth from Alastor’s unwavering gaze. 

“So messy…” Rosie sighs disappointedly before leaning back in her seat. “You’ll have to excuse this behavior, Alastor.” She turns the vibrations up a notch, forcing you to press your legs together. “We’re working on our…edicate. Aren’t we dear?” Both sets of eyes are on you now and you nod, trying to keep your composure. “Yes ma’am...” you answer breathlessly.

Alastor’s eyes crinkle in amusement as he watches your trembling form. Maybe if you weren’t so obvious he could write off the faint buzzing sound as white noise from some nearby machinery. He rests his elbows on the table, fists tucked under his chin as he takes in your appearance. Your hands wring together, seeking some form of comfort in your embarrassment as you fail not to shift in your chair. Eyes glazed over and unfocused, you keep looking to Rosie for approval, small sounds escaping your lips when you don’t get it. His ears pick up on the quickening of your breath, your scent of arousal filling his nose as well.

So odd that Rosie would have her…acquaintance perform such lewd acts so openly in front of him. Surely she didn’t think he wouldn’t notice, right? For a moment things are quiet as you continue your attempts to gather yourself. The sticky wetness growing between your legs provides more and more of a struggle in your situation. Rosie raises the vibrations again, noting the slightest arch of your back in the chair and how your eyes slip close. When they open, your face falls as she slides the remote on the table in Alastor's direction. 

“What’s this?” He ponders, reaching over to inspect the gadget. He takes note of the current setting, looks to his companion as she answers. “That,” she lazily points to the controller, lifting her cup for a sip of tea. “Is what I use to keep my little assistant in line. Isn’t that right?” It takes you a moment to realize she’s talking to you, lost in the pleasurable feeling of the toy nestled inside you. When she calls your name again expectantly, you answer, “H-huh? Oh! Right, y-yes ma’am..!” 

Alastor takes a look at the controller again, half-listening to Rosie ramble on to another topic as if she didn’t just hand him some form of sex technology. If anything he was curious, not usually one to partake in actions of this nature. When he fiddles with one of the knobs, he’s pleasantly surprised at the needy sound that slips from your lips. He feels a slight stirring in his pants, not from the sexual nature of the situation, but from the control the tiny remote in his hand held over you. Before he realizes it, he finds himself speaking, “If I may ask, what exactly is this remote controlling?” 

The glint in Rosie’s eyes and the sharply growing grin on her face almost has Alastor second guessing his curiosity. She turns to you and motions to you to answer him. When his eyes fall on you, you shakily attempt to get up from your chair, knowing exactly where this conversation is going. “I um forgot, I t-think I need to..." you stutter, trying to make an escape. "Sit." Rosie commands, giving you a sharp glance and pointing back to your chair. The desperate noise that escapes you has the other two chuckling as you obediently plop back down in the chair. 

"Your pet listens well," Alastor comments, eyeing your trembling form. Rosie laughs and reaches over to rub a comforting hand on your knee. "Well it's taken some training that's for sure! Such a sweet little thing. Wouldn't know discipline if it hit 'em in the head…” Her nails slightly dig into the area where her hand is placed. “Now...be a dear and answer our guest, you don’t want to be a bad host do you?” 

You shake your head, keeping your head down as your fingers shakily move to unbutton your pants. They watch expectantly as you slowly undress your bottom half, the clothing piling on the floor in front of you. You lift your legs to rest your heels on the sides of the chair you're sitting on and spread yourself wide for them to see. 

The feeling of the cold air coming in contact with your arousal has you burning up, feeling the most exposed in this moment. You can feel your heartbeat between your legs as the vibrations continue from the toy inside of you. The heated gaze of the two overlords has you feeling well past overstimulated, almost as if they had been actively touching you. When your hand reaches down to skim the base of the toy, you let out a wonton moan as the slight bit of pressure. “It vibrates here..” You murmur. Alastor nods silently, absentmindedly pressing the heel of his hand to his crotch to relieve some of the growing sensation. The quiet sigh that leaves his lips doesn't go unnoticed by you or Rosie.

"Oh would you look at the time! I've got to run. I’ve got appointments starting in thirty…can’t be late on the job of course! Sweetie, why don't you help take care of our guest...." Rosie motions over to Alastor as she rises and starts to pick up the dishes on the table, walking into the next room. Immediately you slip off the chair to fall to your knees in front of him. 

The motion presses the toy further in, rubbing perfectly against that sweet bundle of nerves inside of you. Alastor's legs spread wide as he looks at you you with a knowing expression. You look down and bite your lip, rocking against your heels slightly before trying to pull yourself together enough to follow the instructions you were given. 

Knowing very well of his dislike for being touched, you opt to ask politely for his permission before continuing, “May I..?” He waits for a moment, glancing at the little black remote. “Well how can I say no when you ask so nicely? I mean I definitely could…” He brings a pondering hand to his chin, mockingly lost in thought. You can feel your heart beat loudly thumping in your ears as you pitifully beg him to let you help him. “P-please…”

Alastor’s hand slowly drops to his lap, now eyeing you with a predatory gaze. He silently unbuckles his belt, taking his time as he continues on to unbutton his pants. You watch earnestly as his fingers unzip his pants, then disappear under the waistband of his briefs. When he reveals himself, you can’t help licking your lips in anticipation. He slips his pants lower and motions a hand towards you, offering himself.

Being weary of your hand placement, you lean down quickly to take his hardening cock into your mouth. The sound that comes from Alastor startles you, accidentally forcing more of him down your throat. Choking on his cock briefly has you distracted from the task at hand, your eyes flickering to his heated gaze. The look he gives you has you baring down on the toy inside of you, eyes blinking close as you get lost in the pleasure.

At his deep growl, Rosie comes back into the room first gasping in surprise, then letting out a pleased giggle. "Oh my! That certainly isn't what I meant, but I suppose that works too!" Alastor's hand finds purchase in the back of your head, forcing you to take more of him. Your eyes glaze over as you fight your gag reflex, trying so hard to be good for your guest. 

Alastor's hips roll against your mouth, searching for more of your wet heat as he gets closer to completion. His erratic movements have you reaching up to find purchase in his thighs, only to stop right before contact at the sound of the distorted static in the radio demon's voice.  "Don't." Your hands immediately drop to your lap, fists balled up against your knees as he continues to use your mouth as he pleases. 

He doesn't warn you when he cums, but you see the way his sharp smile seems to slightly falter right before his release hits your tongue. Your eyes fall close as your mouth fills with his essence, throwing you into a rapid release as well. Your hips rock backwards as you struggle to swallow it all down. The weight of him against your tongue has you moaning around him, earning a soft chuckle from above you. When your eyes open, they fall on Alastor's, holding contact as he slides out of your mouth and turns off the contraption inside of you. Your tongue immediately flickers against your lips to chase any remnants of him and he gives you a pleased look. 

When you turn towards the table, you notice it's been completely cleared and Rosie makes her appearance again. "Alright, come along now, pull yourself together." She motions a finger to you to come to her as you struggle to quickly dress yourself, tripping over your feet. "Alastor, as always it's a pleasure to see you. I apologize our chat was cut short this time, do come by again soon so we can catch up!" When you look back at Alastor he's already made himself presentable and has a hand extended towards you. 

"Oh and do make sure to thank Alastor! After all he's been quite patient with you...” Rosie raises an eyebrow at you as you accept his assistance and rise to your feet. "T-thank you, sir." You breathed out, looking down to avoid the eyes watching you in the moment. He raises the back of your hand to his lips, the action surprising you enough to glance back up to him. "Of course, the pleasure is all mine."

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Dirty Talk 1

Warnings: non/dubcon and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: Tony Stark

Summary: Your boss is a funny guy, but there's something else about him that puts you on edge. (maid AU)

Note: he's here.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You set another shining glass on the shelf behind the bar. The work is a bit tedious but you make sure all is perfect. As you turn back to grab another, wiping clean any streaks left by the wash, a shadow wanders in from the tall doorway. 

Mr. Stark rubs his eyes as he walks blindly across the spacious room at the top of Stark Tower. His robe is slack on top, his nudity barely concealed by the lazily tied belt. He groans and yawns as he approaches the bar. He drags his hands back and combs out the silver tufts at his temples. 

“Damn, long night,” he grits out. “Get me a whiskey, honey.” 

You don’t mention the time or his dishevelled state. You just smile and oblige him. That’s the thing about Mr. Stark. He’s a very out there sort of guy. Given all his money, many would say eccentric. As his maid, it isn’t your place to question him either. 

“On it, Mr. Stark,” you beam brightly. He winces. 

“Ugh, jeez, the sunshine’s nice but for the last time, it’s Tony, Mr--” 

“Stark is your father,” you finish for him. “I know.” You put down a fresh glass and uncap his special brand of whiskey. 

He leans on the bar and scoops up the glass before you finish, spilling a drop onto the surface. You quickly sop it up with a cloth. You put away the bottle in the cabinet and he sighs. 

“Last night was...” he stops and snickers. “Long.” 

“Busy, I’m sure,” you agree as you turn back to your work. He is a hero and you imagine he has a lot of late ones. 

“Oh, yeah, you wouldn’t believe it. This woman. Mmm.” 

“Is she okay? Did she get hurt? You saved her right?” You spin to face him. 

He laughs again, “I was off duty.” 

You nod, confused, but don’t ask what he means. He says a lot of things that just kind of go over your head. It’s just who he is. Always joking around. You’re surprised given that he chose to take on such a serious role. An Avenger of all things. 

“How about you pour yourself a glass, honey?” He slurps and slams down his empty glass. 

“Oh, I can’t. I’m working.” 

“Right, but I’m your boss.” 

“Yeah, but... I wouldn’t do a very good job if I was tipsy,” you shrug and set another glass away. 

“Light weight?” He wonders. 

“Sensitive tummy,” you answer with another bright grin. “The cleaner dropped off your suit for tonight.” 

“Great,” he says with less approval than the word would suggest. He watches you and you carry on. “How long have you been here?” 

“Just a bit. I just got started on all this. Didn’t get much further than clearing up the empties,” you explain. 

“Mm, how about you go work on the bedroom. I left a mess in there,” he reaches over the bar and grabs the bottle of whiskey, twisting free the blocky stopper to swig directly from the neck. 

“Sure, uh, I’ll finish this after then,” you step back from the rows of glasses. “Anything else? Maybe some coffee?” 

“Nah, this will wake me up,” he wiggles the bottle and spins away. 

You leave him as he goes to the couch and flops down. The drinking isn’t new. You would be concerned if you had any place to be. Of course, who wouldn’t worry about the world’s best hero being a lush? 

You head off to his bedroom with a bounce in your step. You’re thankful for what you have. It’s nice working in Stark Tower. You try not to mention to the other women at the agency all the perks. Usually a free meal and a few gift cards out of gratitude. Your work isn’t difficult, even if the place is humongous. 

The bedroom door is open as you approach. You sweep inside. The curtains are drawn, the space dim. You go over to the floor length drapes and pull the cord to part them, letting in the morning. You hear a whine and turn to find a pear-shaped bottom, naked and defined, right out in the cold. You nearly let out a squeal yourself. 

“Ugh, my head,” the brunette groans and rolls over, hugging the silky duvet, “close that, Ton.” 

You clear your throat. She doesn’t react. She merely buries her head under arm and grumbles. You look around then swing your arms awkwardly as you move cautiously around the room. You tidy up the little things, trying not to make too much noise. 

“Goddamn, what are you doing?” A pillow hits your back and you turn to face the woman as she sits up, her supple chest exposed. “Tony! Ahhhhh!” She shrieks and you cover your ears. “Who the fuck are you?” 

You wince and show your teeth. You press your hands to your cheeks and sink into your shoulder, “I’m the maid.” 

“The maid!? Where--” She looks around, “where is Tony?” 

“He’s having a drink--” 

“So what? He sent you to show me the door? God, I know he’s slimy but fuck’s sakes,” she pushes herself off the bed and scoops up her dress from the floor. 

“Can I steam that for you?” You offer. She is a guest after all. 

“Get the fuck away from me,” she holds her arm out and flicks her fingers in your direction. 

You flinch, “alright, uh, coffee--” 

“Oh, would you go!? I need to get out of here. Urgh!” She throws the wrinkled dress over her head and grabs her heels from the floor. “I can’t believe that bastard. Couldn’t even give me a Berkin.” 

She storms out and you stare after her. You frown. You hope Mr. Stark doesn’t think you said anything wrong. You were perfectly nice. 

You sniff and go to the bed to tidy the sheets. A strip of black lace falls free. You pick up the panties in a pinch and look to the door. You scurry around and into the hall. 

“Miss! You forgot--” 

She’s gone. You stop, still holding up the panties. You shake your head. They are entirely impractical. Your cheeks would be chafing. 

“Oh, those are sexy,” Stark’s voice draws you around and he winks. You blanch at the under wear in your hand and hide them behind your back. “Yours?” 

“Sir, uh... no... your guest, er, left.” 

“Ah, yes, her,” he scoffs. “Forgettable.” 

“Mm, okay, uh, well, I suppose I’ll just toss these.” You say. 

“What a waste. How about you give ‘em a quick wash and try em on,” he snickers. 

“Sir, you’re so silly,” you shake your head. “I gotta finish making the bed.” 

“Go on, get on it. You deserve the break,” he purrs as he follows you, stopping at the doorway as you enter.  

You ignore him and put the panties on the night table. You shake out the duvet and drop the corner, suppressing a gasp at the stains on the sheet. Oh. 

“What’s the matter, honey?” He asks. 

You shake off your revulsion, “just remembered,” you grab the pillows and strip off the covers, “laundry day.” 

“Is it?” He hums. 

“Yes, sir, uh, Tony,” you pull down the corners of the fitted sheet. 

“Too bad,” he tuts. “Was looking forward to a lazy day in bed.” 

“I can get a fresh set,” you offer as you crumple up the bedding near the foot of the frame. 

“Bah, fuck it. No use laying in bed alone,” he mutters. “What was it you said about coffee?” 

[sheepispink]

A LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Masterlist AO3

pairings: Simon Ghost Riley/ Reader (platonic or romantic, up to you)

tags: probably loads of military inaccuracies, anxiety attacks (possibly?), heavy angst, angst and comfort, paranoia, bad mental health, cuddling and literal sleeping together (up to you romantic or platonic)

A/N: I’d appreciate if no one complained abt the accuract/realistic of the story (ofc if its the characterisation of ghost that’s perfectly ok!) i’m open for criticisation for how i write etc etc but this is a sensitive topic and.. based off personal experiences 😅😅 so it’s very realistic to me even if its not to you!

This technically takes place after this fic but it’s not a big deal in which the order you read it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re an introvert, even if you do get excited really quickly, loud around people you’ve known for a while and love meeting new people. Yet still, you call yourself an introvert, even if that technically still makes you an extroverted introvert. You don't like the sound of an extrovert— someone who thrives off of others' attention and loves to be the center of it, who brightens their days with their friends and always wants to make plans with anyone and everyone. You like the attention sometimes; when Price mentions your name in a conversation, praising your skills, your heart thumps a little louder. Being at the limelight of the party isn't always the worst thing either, especially when everyone laughs at your jokes so hard they double over, grinning so wide you can't help it either. You love your friends, your teammates, even the random soldiers you’ve only exchanged small greetings with. The love for others is held tight in your heart’s vessels, bursting each and every time they make you smile or you just see their presence. You feel so warm and alive when you give them a grin in the mornings, even more so when they seek out your presence throughout the day.

Though, that only applies sometimes— never always.

A familiar soldier could ask you out to lunch and yet your chest begins to twist uncomfortably, like someone is wringing your intestines with their hands. Something screams at you when they say those words, like an invisible line had just been crossed that had been clear in everyone's heads. You had only ever spoken to those soldiers in the gym or around base, there was nowhere else even remotely personal you’d think to take them to. One on one conversations were not common either, since it wasnt that often. It’s not that you don't like them, it’s just.. not right. You’d shake your head apologetically as you force an excuse between your teeth. The regret you then express is a lie, along with the love you felt before— only reduced to a being who could never hold any of those things.

The truth is, you have a sick little parasite in you, it claws at that heart muscle, tearing away the flesh and devouring any love you feel for the people you care about and replacing it with an empty feeling which is always followed by an unreasonable hatred. Your mind grows dark, headaches permanent, as you live through the day as a skeleton of yourself— no longer able to hold any love within you as it slips past your bones in seconds. You don't like the boundaries you’ve mentally set for each person to be crossed, even if it’s a perfectly normal task. In fact, some may even say you’re scared of change. You don’t like to put a label on these things, hell you don't even like to think too hard on these things. It begins to make sense when you sit and reflect, piecing all the reasons for your behaviour together until you hit the final point. Soon you’re done, finally aware of the most significant reasoning behind your antics. The only issue is, being self aware doesn't mean you get any better; no matter how many nights you sit and stare at that mirror, nothing changes.

The only thing you gained was the ability to squash down the parasite from prying eyes. Excuses fall from your lips quickly, no matter how bad you feel when they give you that look of disappointment. It’s not your fault— you know you won't be able to handle an outing like that, you’d get too worked up. Why? You don't need to dwell on it, not right now. This continues for multiple people, multiple soldiers for two weeks, until you're ‘normal’ and you hang around others again. People begin to subconsciously catch on and so your little routine continues to carry on moving so well, staying right on track.

“Sarge? You aint comin’ to team night? Why?”

Ghost stands at the door of your quarters, dressed in his typical training attire whilst you’re sitting in something cozy, made for home wear. You have to fight the urge to cover yourself up. “Oh right.. i, uh..yknow, lot of paperwork to do. Thought i’d stay in.”

You say with a small smile, attempting to ease any concerns he had before but little did you know, he was already growing aware of your little issue, or at least the fact there was one within you. “Paperwork? On a Friday? You should be relaxin’.” You grit your teeth a little, the burning urge inside of your chest returning just like the sick pit in your stomach. It felt so awful fearing just a simple team night out, but it was just so late and you were so tired— you didnt have the energy to be rational the whole time, to think of your next move constantly.

“It’s not a big deal. I’ll come to the next one.” You shrug, turning back to your small desk as you pull another small stack of papers in front of you. His boots thump loudly against the floorboards, sounding like the heavy thump of your heart in your ears. It stops, suddenly, behind your back and your body stiffens as he leans down, looking at the paperwork you’re going through. It’s a lie— naturally, you finished it all. He doesn't even have to stare at you first nor visibly raise a brow; you’re already waiting for him to call out your bluff just as quickly.

“You can just say you want some time alone, yknow.” That catches you off guard, half expecting him to just tell you to stop whining and grab some drinks. His words were still difficult though, how could you easily just say that? Of course, the words itself aren't the hard part, nor speaking it—it’s the implications behind said words. An excuse means you have other things to occupy you, so no one dares to disturb you much after that, however explaining you want some alone time gives way to more questions. Specifically the first being: why? Then they begin to wonder if you’ve been doing okay recently or if you’re struggling with something. You dont like the idea of that at all— people thinking about you in that way. It feels weird, almost like it’s wrong. Sometimes you wished people would just not care, and leave you alone to wallow with yourself.

“Sarge?” You snap out of it, sheepishly scratching the back of your head as he still stands behind you and you turn in your chair, putting the best meek face you can on for the night. “What? No, that’s not why I declined. I’m not really feeling any alcohol today and a new episode of a series I previously binged on the weekend just came out. Sorry.. didn't want to make it seem i was ditching anyone for a show.” Perfect, an awkward grin had tied it all off into a well constructed excuse. Even if it was partially true and this really wasn't fake, it sure felt like everything you did was an act. After all, you really didn't want them to think you were ditching anyone, and you didn't feel like having any alcohol tonight. “A new series” He says gruffly, and you nod with a tight smile, teeth gritting so hard you’re sure they’ll break in a few seconds. “I’ll join you then.”

You blink once, twice, three times in pure utter confusion. Ghost—The Ghost, whose name is rumoured across the battlefield and known for never giving into idle small talk—wants to watch the series you lied about, with you.

You’ve never felt more guilty in your entire life, practically fumbling for a solution. You could just tell the truth, say no and admit you needed to be alone. But this is the first time he’s ever expressed wanting to hang around you, actually together and alone— and miss out on a team night?! He may just want an excuse out of it, but still, you can't just say no now. “Well yeah, i just..” You hate how there’s no easy way out of this in the slightest, torn between saving your own mental health or finally getting close to the teammate who you’ve been on eggshells around for nearly a year now. “My room’s not exactly clean--“

He cuts you off with a gruff, shake of his head, a scoff resounding in his next words, promptly embarrassing you too. “There ya go— knew you wanted to be alone.”

You fumble, not understanding how he managed to pry it out of you so fast, just a simple lie blowing your cover. “I said it wasn't like-“

“See you tomorrow.” He’s gone just as fast as he silenced you, heavy footsteps disappearing out of your door and down the corridors. What you couldn't wrap your head around is how fast he had figured it out and made you confess to your lies that fast— it was a real problem, something you couldn't just let slide. If he knew, did others too?

Unfortunately for you, the very much needed alone time didn’t help as well as it usually did considering this new information has threatened everything that made up the core of your very being—specifically everything keeping you glued together. You just couldn't sit there and possibly relax like you usually did when alone (more specifically think over everything you’ve done wrong until you quite literally fell asleep mid thought)— not when Ghost could clearly read everything you had ever thought about in your life.

That being said, you’ve been a nervous wreck all week, concentrating so hard on looking sane that you’ve barely paid a second of attention to things you should’ve listened to. It’s not like you slipped up regularly, but before that day you were already feeling pretty uneasy and now with still no relief and the added stress, you feel like you really might lose it any second now. Every time you see him, every word exchanged with your teammates—with another person—it eats at you, tugging further on the ropes you’re hanging onto. They’re already been pulled thin, especially since you’ve been put in charge of a group of rookies for the past few weeks now. Of course, you had pulled the short straw when assignments went round because not only did your group love to talk back, but they loved to test every limit by asking the most stupid of questions possible. It’s the second time now you’ve had to lecture one of the rookies about why you can’t just ‘throw a grenade at the enemies’. It’s only temporary, just basic training exercises and medical procedures they need to know until the Officer, who usually oversees them, returns from their sick leave.

You let out a long breath as you enter the small break room, also known as taskforce 141’s meeting room but they’ve let you lounge in here too many times to count. It’s quiet in here, Soap and Gaz both on missions and you assume Ghost must be too. It’s the first time you’ve been able to relax all week, knowing damn well Price is down in London with Gaz. Your shoulders sag, the miserable look returning to cover your features now that you don't need to pull that tight smile anymore. Your chest physically aches from how anxious you’ve been all day, the weight of the day’s mistakes and fears of the future swelling deep in your gut. You know it’s a Friday, know you should just take a long sleep but you can’t help but think about all you have to do for the days to follow. You’re busy the whole day tomorrow, a team outing you can’t deny no matter how much you really do not want to go. Just thinking of all the final work you’ll have to cram in on Sunday makes a splitting pain run along the bumps in your brain. Even your breaths begin to feel shorter, an uncomfortable feeling that you just still cant rid of no matter how long you take deep breaths. Your eyes are weighed down with exhaustion and yet your brain refuses to let you sleep yet. No, you cannot. If you sleep the night away then you’ll only have Sunday left for yourself, and that won't work out, will it?

You pick up the mug you had just stirred, hoping the drink would soothe at least something if not your dehydrated body. Taking a small sip, the hot liquid spills down your throat, leaving a warm feeling in your ribs. “Alone by choice or force?” A gruff voice rings out behind you, along with an arm reaching around to supposedly grab a teabag as well, is enough to make you flinch. Stumbling on your own feet, your mug jolts and the steaming water splashes against your shoulder. If you were worried about someone catching you so vulnerable before, you were certainly terrified now, especially since your skin was burning from a small startle.

“Fuck— sorry—“

Ghost’s gloved hand settle on one side of your waist while the other quickly takes the mug from your hands and places it upon the counter. You cant respond, barely processing the situation and everything just feels like too much and your skin feels so hot, you know he’s seeing you fall apart and still there’s nothing you can do—

Your thoughts snap to a blank when he presses the cold rag against your burning skin. Thankfully the layers of the training uniform stops any severe marks from forming. His other hand rubs your cheek, his mask so close it could brush your face, and you can actually see every speck of brown in his irises. You can't look at him for long though, moving your gaze away quickly, not when you know what you’ve done. For the past week or two you’ve hated him, painting the most horrible picture in your mind. It wasnt even on purpose, you’ve just started seeing everything wrong about him. He doesnt give the rookies much mercy, nor does he particularly entertain any of Soap’s antics even when the situation is pretty lax. He’s boring, he seems to care about nothing but himself somedays, he refuses to let you do something stupid and he never takes that damn mask off even when you’re all supposed to trust one another. You’ve lied to him, yes, forgetting about your hatred when he made you laugh with those gruff remarks. But he’s not the only one— no, you’ve began to hate everyone in this task force, picking at them and every little thing. It’s weird, you don't want to victimize yourself, because you know you’ve done just as much wrong too. But still, somedays you really can't look past the list of things you dislike about your own friends.

“Are you alright? I havent seen you all week.”

Of course he hasn't, you’ve been avoiding them all. It’s nearly impossible to think straight these days and you knew you wouldn’t be able to fake it so naturally, you just stayed away. The more you did it, the better it began to feel. Avoiding them was the solution— you were just the thorn in their side with your tricky mood swings and anxiety always painting them to be the villain. You couldnt just allow this to happen, to destroy them with your issues even if they had no idea about it.

But now, face to face with him, all you feel is unexplainable guilt for everything you’ve done to them— how could you even hate them for a second? His hand is still rubbing at your skin, nudging your face gently upwards just so you’d at least look at him for a second. “Really? The silent treatment now?.” He sighs and you hate yourself, how did you let this spiral to this point— to where he’s apologising to you and yet you wish you could just disappear. Isnt this what you wanted? For everyone to be kind to you? So why are you running— why do you refuse care?

Your lips press together as your teeth bite down on the soft flesh, torn from how much you’ve picked at the skin the whole week. It aches with anxiety, and your teeth hurt from how often you’ve clenched them so hard they scraped against eachother. The only thing you can do is stand there as Ghost fusses over you, trying to get you to move a damn muscle instead of falling apart silently like some kind of broken watch, unable to move forward or backwards. Just still.

“Sarge— snap out of it, look, I'm sorry. Okay?”

His hands are still on you, and you’ve begged for a day where someone would care this much about you and still, you step back, almost afraid. “I’m sorry, Ghost.” You croak out, your hands reaching up to your eyes as you wipe at your skin obsessively, trying to hide and stop anything from leaking. “Why’re you apologising?” He says gruffly, confused by all of this, this sudden onslaught of emotion.

He’s not stupid, he had a feeling you weren't quite yourself this week. Stupidly, he figured you’d just deal with it on your own. That's what everyone did, right? He knows he just takes a breather when he feels a little rough— even Price had his own battles. Comfort isn't a strong point for Ghost, not even when he was Simon Riley, never has and he never thinks it will be. He’s born and bred on violence and the coldness that comes after it, the lack of warmth even as hot blood trickles and emptiness consumes the space where his fellow soldiers should be. So watching you crumble right before him, apologising profusely while your body wracks with shaken breaths, makes something stop in him too. He doesn't know how he’ll do it, but he knows damn well no one fights alone anymore.

“Look at me.”

He says firmly, both his hands landing firmly on your shoulders, one hand even tempted to just force your chin up but you shake your head profusely. “Why not?” He stays patient for you, even if he knows he may have to force you soon— its the least he can do for you. “I cant look at you. Not after everything i did.” He pauses, hands now settling on your jaw in confusion, he knows this is moving towards an interrogation but he has to know. “What are you talking about?! What did you do?”

“I hated all of you! I avoided you all and destroyed our relationship, i fucked it all up.”

With that he cant stand to see this continue, a gloved hand firmly planted over your mouth as the other wraps around your back. He leads you to the couch even as you squirm, not caring in the slightest. He knows he has strength and not comfort, so he’ll use it to shut you up whilst the truth comforts you instead.

“Look at me.” He says sternly and you do, eyes snapping up with wide fear as you look at him. “That’s not true— okay? None of us consider our relationship with you ruined, not one of us has even mentioned you in a bad light at all.” He makes sure your whole body is pressed against the back of the couch, considering that you didnt particularly look as if you could hold yourself up right now.

“Soap has only talked to me about you once recently— he told me you helped him organize the training schedules for the rookies. Told me to thank you for it because he felt he did not express his gratitude enough. Do you understand now? No one’s mad at you– not one of us have even considered anything to have gone wrong.”

His hand grabs your own, settling it on the center of his chest so you can feel the pattern of his breathing, silently praying you’d try and match it. You can only blink at him though, slowly processing his words with each passing second until his hand leaves your mouth and your lips part, breath hitched before you swallow a sharp breath. “I’ve avoided all of you– i’ve been hating all of you.” You choke out, chest clenching with regret and the weight of unreasonable guilt and his other hand moves to hold your face again, his brown eyes piercing into yours with his silence.

“What is like to hate someone?”

“What?”?

“What is it like to hate someone?” He repeats, his thumb pressing gently into the curve of your cheek.

“I-...” You falter, thinking for a moment before your lips part again. “I dont like things that they do— the way they act and everything about them.”

“You’d avoid them too, right? Like that general you hated. Remember when he touched you and you pushed his hand away?

You nod along in agreement, breathing a bit slower to hopefully ease the pressure on your chest at the moment.

“Y-yeah.. i’d express my dislike clearly..”

“So why did you never push me away the past few weeks? You said you avoided us, but you would always speak to us if we needed to. You still helped Soap too.”

You pause, blinking at him in confusion now, you had convinced yourself that you hated them so why did you never.. actually express it?

“You’re also letting me touch you now and last week you didn't want to hang out with us, but you didnt want to hurt our feelings by saying that.”

You’re left silent, baffled and confused because in your head, you were being horrible to them, hating their guts like it was nothing.

“I think… whatever is going on in that head of yours.” He says slowly, tapping at your forehead gently as you look up at him with widened eyes. “You’ve held it in for too long. You’ve dwelled on those thoughts, so self aware of your own anxieties that you’ve distorted reality. You think you’ve done something bad, because you can't understand why you always feel so bad.” His voice is softer than usual, even if his words are still gruff and holds his thick Manchester accent.

Somehow that alone reminds you that Simon has never lied, not even once, to you. That stern voice of his is straightforward, doesnt mess around and forces his way through any problem. Just like he had just pushed himself to the root of your mind and destroyed your seeds of doubt.

“You’re allowed to talk to us you know. I have a funny feeling you’re scared o’ somethin’. Not sure what just yet.”

He doesnt force you to respond, just speaking his thoughts even if that’s what you usually do when you’re together. The couch creaks as he stand up, pulling you to get up aswell beside him. He places a hand on the crook of your back, gently encouraging you to begin walking towards the door. “Cmon, back to my room. Lets get you cleaned up properly.”

Before you know it, you’re sitting against the headboard of his bed, something you had only felt months ago when you first came here, scared and confused over a stupid hornet. You trusted him to help you then, but you dont understand why you suddenly felt that fear again. Meanwhile, your shirt is half off, Ghost sat on the bed beside you as he inspects the burns on your chest from the tea. It’s harsh, the skin reddened but not enough to be something serious thankfully. He presses a cool towel against it, soothing the stinging skin but he knows it’ll fade out soon enough. You’re wearing his old shirt, and he gave you some comfortable sweatpants too for good measure. You just watch all his moves so quietly, feeling like a ghost yourself in this moment from how detached you are. It’s weird, feeling so much yet nothing at the same time.

“Nothing too bad, should be alright by the morning.” He hums, lifting the fresh mug of tea he brewed for you and brings it to your lips for you to sip before he steals some for himself. “Is your chest still tight?” You blink, not expecting him to ask that of all things because you hadnt exactly mentioned that part and yes, it was. “How did you know..?” Your hand reaches out, silently asking for more of the tea he graciously lets you sip, unable to fathom how he brews it so perfectly each time. “You were clutching at your chest before and your breaths are a little shorter than they should be.” He’s seen straight through you again so you slump your shoulders and just nod quietly. “Yeah, it’s really tight. It’s always like this and i dont know how to make it stop.”

His gloved hand reaches out, gently rubbing at your chest thus making you sink a little back into the pillows. Before he can respond, you speak up with a quiet confession. “That day, when you came ‘round, I was upset. You said you wanted to watch the series with me and I felt so bad. I didn't want to give up my only chance of spending time with you, but I knew my head couldn't take it.”

He nods along quietly, letting you reveal it all to him. “T-then you figured me all out and i got scared— i didnt want someone to know everything about me because i didnt want to be a problem. I want someone to listen but i dont want to be seen as something different. I just.. i dont know how to handle all of this. I dont feel like the person i am when i look in the mirror.”

The strangest thing of all is that it didnt actually take you long to figure it out. You knew all along, of course, but when you’re fighting against yourself, you’re supporting both sides and so a part of you decided not to dwell on a certain bit of information too much. The reason for that to be pushed aside is no part of you wanted to face it.

Your heart always secretly wished someone would find out— that someone would push past the walls you’ve banged so hard against even if they were crafted by the webs of your brain. You prayed and prayed that they’d read through it all, express their concern and one day, one day you’d be saved from this hellish feeling. It was a common daydream for you and yet you were terrified of it. If someone knew, there was no guarantee they’d follow the fantasy. They could ridicule you, or they couldnt be able to comfort you at all, maybe they’d try and it wouldnt even do anything or maybe, just maybe— they wouldnt give a damn about it. What happened then? If that daydream was real, and that was the final outcome, there was no turning back in time. It seemed like only one person would ever figure you out, after all, no one had up until this point.

But then Simon became aware, and you got terrified. You hid away because you were too scared to know his reaction to your problems, even more so his reaction to you. You wanted someone to help, you really did, and yet your brain feared to know the uncertain future of it.

His ungloved hands card through your hair, the callouses gentle against your scalp as he slowly scratches at it. “You need to speak with us, and the others. Your feelings are real— hell, we all have our doubts. I used to feel it before every mission. Soap began to tell me his, then Gaz joined too. Price always looks for a way to solve it, and i give my two pence when i feel i want to. Just cause you feel different, doesnt mean you are. Plenty o’ people felt the same way you did before.”

“Really..? I’m not like.. crazy?”

“No, never. Even if you do some stupid shit sometimes.”

That makes you finally crack a real smile, even if its small and you’re unable to stifle the small chuckle that bubbles in your throat and although he’s the epitome of stoicism, he smiles beneath the mask. “Everyone’s out on a mission, ya can't leave me alone tonight. C’mere.”

You settle yourself in the crook of arm as he lays back against the bed with you, propping up his laptop on his lap as he searches for a good movie.

“You better report back to me everyday this week, alright? I want you here at nine pm sharp, dressed in your pajamas. That’s an order.”

Thinking over all your previous daydreams of how this would eventually go, this was far from how you expected it to be. Firstly, you never expected Ghost, nor it to happen in the military at all. Perhaps you thought maybe later in life it’d occur or maybe Soap or Price would figure it out. Either way, you arent actually upset over it. No one would be your fairy tale saviour in life, coming forward to fight the demons that plagued your head all the time. Even so, the way Ghost had shut you up and calmed you down makes you think he’s pretty damn close to being one, even if knights usually dont scoff at their princess.

He doesnt even look like he’d be willing to give a little kid a hug, but still, you couldnt be happier with how this turned out in the end. Compared to fairytale princes and men in the movies, you knew Ghost and you knew he was serious— so if he wanted to help you, he would. And no, he wouldnt ridicule you throughout the process, nor ever feel like you’ve been misheard. You know that if you spoke to Ghost, he’d listen earnesty and never forget, carrying that around with him even if those anxieties eventually died out.

You knew he’d always linger around, never forgetting you or leaving you behind. Just like a Ghost.

“Okay, i promise i will.”

You say softly, pressing your cheek against the curve of his chest, the faint thump of his heartbeat drowning out any lost thoughts. He was your support, and no matter how bad it got for you, no matter how many times you get overwhelmed and lash out, not even when you avoid everyone— he’d never break away. No, he would always be beside you.

[meanbossart]

Hey! I was thinking of trying to write something for you about DU Drow but after a trying to gather stuff about him via your page I’m struggling to get something substantial for his personality- like I get it mostly (I think?) but it’s hard to put into words (which makes it easier for me) so if it’s not too much to ask; how would you explain DU Drows personality and maybe some of his values? - if you don’t mind! I love your art BTW!

Man, this is a tough ask and I MADE the guy. The fic is definitely the best place to see his personality in action, but it is also 20 chapters long so far - and I'm a fairly reasonable man.

Before I get to any descriptions, there's two important things to note: A) Overwhelmingly, his looks do not match his demeanor. and B) DU drow is extremely hedonistic in practice. He might claim to have certain beliefs or standards but hardly ever practices them.

Anyways, I present to you: The guy, more-or-less summarized to the best of my abilities.

BEHAVIOR: Purposefully standoffish. He wants to be noticed, but he does not want to be bothered. He's a little bit stiff with his body language and mostly makes use of head/neck gestures to assert his sentences and signal his level of interest. On that note, me makes it extremely obvious for the socially-versed individual to tell what he thinks of them - he hardly ever tries to hide if he's disinterested, annoyed, or having a laugh at your expense. He expresses emotion through his face a normal amount, but his default look is eerily bland, and subtle emotions might go unnoticed because of his eye-color and thin brows.

As it is with most people, the more uncomfortable he is with a situation the more stiff and inexpressive he becomes, and vice versa.

SPEECH: DU drow is very much well spoken, and simultaneously very blunt. He abides by most conversational formalities (definitely more formal than you would assume him to be) and basic etiquette. He will greet you and he will say please and thank you even if clearly not meaning it or feeling like you're unworthy of the gesture. Sometimes, he does it just to be patronizing.

With all of that in mind, he has a tendency to use violent turns of phrase and analogies to express himself, this applies to both negative and positive feelings. That being said he's aware of social norma and knows full well when things are or aren't appropriate, even if sometimes he chooses to ignore that and be weird anyway - usually with the purpose of intimidation.

He is the most earnest and sincere with very close friends (quite literally only Astarion and Shadowheart) and rather curt with everyone else unless you catch him in a particularly good mood. He's a little chummier with dwarves and duergar (he finds them amusing and fun to hang out with) and reserves a slight bit more tenderness and kindness for children and mothers, especially if they're elves. He's also fond of animals. He is dismissive of gnomes, goblins, bugbears, half/full orcs and hobgoblins. He despises githyanki and drow. He treats humans fairly respectfully but thinks they are a far lesser race than pretty much all others.

He has a very dark/offensive sense of humor and a tendency to make well crafted, but cruel jokes or quips about sensitive topics. This goes for everybody, including people he's on good terms with.

VALUES: Here's where things get tricky. DU drow is both a hypocrite and a unreliable narrator of his own story, not to mention deeply unfamiliar with his own inner-workings and feelings. Politically, he would be the guy who doesn't vote, doesn't want to pay taxes and dreams of living off the grid, who thinks everybody should pull themselves up by the bootstraps and that it's a dog-eats-dog world. He hates systems of government, authority figures, hierarchical structures and archaic customs. He believes it would a chaotic but functional world if people governed themselves.

In practice, he doesn't stand for anything and gladly overlooks injustices and things that don't align with his supposed values as long as they favor him, or just don't get in his way, and easily makes exceptions for things on a whim. He's indifferent to slavery; unless it's Astarion's. - He thinks humans are a worthless pet-race, except for his dearest and nearest friend, the half-elf Shadowheart. He thinks Half-orcs are intellectually inferior, but he will gladly be chummy with them if they amuse him and make for good-company during a night-out.

INNER WORLD AND INTIMACY: DU drow is extremely unfamiliar with his own emotions and very often comes up empty when he has to justify or explain anything that is based on feeling, while simultaneously operating on impulse and instinct for the vast majority of the time. He is subject to fear, resentment, and insecurity as much as anyone else, but carries a deep shame in acknowledging his own vulnerability at all. He is very intense when it comes to love, however, and shows no reluctance in expressing it through his words and actions towards the people he cares about. He does care for the levels of comfort of those dearest to him though, and doesn't bombard them with it unless the moment is right, or if overwhelmed into doing so. The same applies to physical affection - he's extremely comfortable with it, but cares deeply for respecting the boundaries of his loved ones. When it comes to strangers, he only touches them outside of combat if there is some kind of power-game at play.

A couple of other things that might be of note:

-He likes creature comforts, but is also fine with going without them and won't ever complain about having to live, sleep, or survive in less-than-ideal circumstances as long as he feels in control of the situation. -He can be enticed by valuables and gold because they make the immediate future easier, but he doesn't seek a life of vast riches. -He is not an alcoholic but probably has a binge-drinking problem. -While he is fond and respectful of animals, he has no issues killing them if the situation calls for it. -He pretty much always believes himself to be the most impressive person in the room. -He is not a vain man, but very much likes the way that he looks and to have it be acknowledged by his partner. -He believes faith, religion, and gods to be a waste of time.

[damiansgoodgirll]

hi❤️ive been following you since you were writing about jude bellingham lol 😂 i wanted to ask you if you could make a damian priest x reader story where reader is plus sized and she’s struggling with losing weight and she wants to be perfect for damian because she sees the type of women he’s surrounded by but reader hurts herself like she faints or something happens and damian (rhea too if you want include her) get worried for her, please make it angsty i love your angst stories 😭❤️ thank you for this ❤️❤️

thanks for your request! i’ve been struggling with ED my whole life so this piece is kind of a piece of me. if you ever need someone to talk to i’m here ❤️ just to remind you that you are beautiful the way you are, you deserve all the love and happiness in the world ❤️

damian priest x curvy - plus sized - chubby reader

likes comments and reblogs are always appreciated!!

‼️ANGST, heavy angst, ED (eating disorders), reader starving herself, fainting, self conscious reader, hurt/comfort, DON’T READ THIS IF IT’S A SENSITIVE TOPIC FOR YOU ‼️

be skinny

be skinny - your mind told you.

don’t eat this, you’re gonna gain weight - it kept whispering.

you couldn’t recall when all of this started. sure, you’ve always had a love and hate relationship with your body, with your appearance but it never got to the point where you constantly checked yourself in every mirror you could find. it never got to the point where you would weight yourself every morning to see if you magically lost weight over night.

damian made all of those feelings go away. at the beginning of your relationship you told him how uncomfortable you were being naked in front of him, fearing that he might have judged you for how you looked but he never failed to make you feel comfortable and loved. you remember the days he spent just worshipping your body, saying how perfect you were to him and how much he loved you.

all those fears disappeared with damian so when did it really begin?

probably when he started appearing in his perfect colleagues tiktoks. how easy he was for them to lift them up, throw them around in the ring. they looked nothing like you. they were skinny and yet had muscles. their bodies were heaven’s made.

and then you saw how people - women - drooled under damian’s instagram posts. and you knew that one day he would leave you for one of them. they were pretty, models, something you weren’t.

damian had no idea your mind was playing tricks like that. if he knew, he wouldn’t let you go into this alone, he would be there with you, taking your pain away and fighting your demons, fighting for you.

you knew that and the idea of disappoint him made you even sicker.

the days he was away from work were the perfect days you had to work out, limit yourself with food and trying not to starve yourself. you started by following some easy work out on youtube, cutting out all carbs, drinking more water. things that seemed healthy to you.

but you weren’t getting the results you wanted so you pushed yourself even further. from skipping breakfast and dinner, from working out with damian’s tools - and hurting yourself multiple times because you had no idea how to use them - from drinking water over prioritising food.

you were slowly killing yourself and you didn’t even notice it.

but damian did. he saw the shift in your mood. how you went from being the normal you to being the always tired and hungry you. he noticed that someone used his gym to work out and he knew it was you but he also was aware of the situation you were in. he feared that if he spoke about it you would get mad or that he would trigger something in you, so he stayed quiet.

probably his worst mistake.

as time went by you saw small changes in your appearance. you lost weight, your face looked slimmer and your waist looked smaller but you were starving yourself to the point you would fall asleep everywhere because of the lack of energy you had.

one day as you were hanging out with rhea you were struggling to stay awake and remain focused on what she was saying. you skipped lunch, only eating an apple and drinking plenty of water. you workout for almost two hours before rhea got to your home.

and as she was talking you were trying stay awake but you couldn’t.

“…you okay?” rhea asked when she saw you dozing off.

“uh? yeah sorry i just need a little bit of water, keep talking” you laughed pretending everything is normal. but the moment you stood up from your couch, your legs began shaking a little and rhea was immediately standing next to you

“are you sure you’re okay?” she asked, her hand quickly checking your temperature.

“yeah no worries, i just need a little bit of water…” but two more steps and you fainted on the floor. rhea being able to catch you and trying to wake you up but you were laying there unconscious.

she quickly called 911, scared that you were sick or worse. she stayed with you during the whole ride to the hospital and while you were being checked out, she called damian, informing him that you were currently at the hospital.

damian was at the local gym with his brother when he got the call. panicking, it took him less than twenty minutes to ride to the emergency room. seeing rhea as she was waiting for some news, he ran towards her.

“what happened?” he was clearly panicking. not saying hello or how are you. he couldn’t care less at the moment, you were his priority.

“i don’t know…she fainted, she looked, i don’t know, tired? dehydrated? i don’t know how to describe it but she wasn’t the normal y/n i know…” rhea softly spoke to him but he immediately knew what was the problem. he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath otherwise he was going to explode.

he knew. he knew for all of this time and he didn’t say anything. fearing you would get mad or worse, but what was worse than having you in an hospital bed?

he cursed under his breath, trying to calm himself.

he was blaming himself. he knew it was his fault. if he said something. if he talked with you about it, you probably wouldn’t be laying down there.

but his mind stopped thinking the moment the doctor told him what he didn’t want to hear - you were definitely dehydrated, you haven’t eaten a proper mean in days, you’ve been overworking yourself and your body was sore from the too many hours you spent training.

“can i see her?” damian asked and immediately went to your room once the doctor told him that you were awake.

the moment damian saw your eyes, he couldn’t hold the few tears falling down his eyes.

he saw how you avoided his look and he was suffering for you.

slowly he sat on the bed next to you.

“baby…mi amor” he called you, looking at your face.

turning your head to him, you saw his teary eyes and you couldn’t control your own tears any longer.

“mi amor, why?” that’s all he wanted to know.

“i wanna be skinny” your broken voice whispered “i wanna be skinny so bad damian, you don’t understand how it feels…” but he did. he understood perfectly how you were feeling because he’s been there, in your position. he lost a lot of weight, he was a new person now and he knew the feeling of not being good enough for you or other people. he knew it was deeper for you, and if he could he would take all of your pain away but he knew he couldn’t.

his hand gently stoked your cheek, his thumb drying your tears away “baby, why? you’re so perfect the way you are…i love you so fucking much, why hurting yourself?” his tone was soft and sweet.

“but i don’t damian! i don’t love the way i am, the way i look, the way i make you look when we are out together…i’m not perfect and i wanted to be perfect, for you, for me…” your tears falling down your cheeks.

damian’s heart broke when you said those words. you were more than enough for him. but he knew that it was you who needed to see that, not him.

“starving yourself won’t make you perfect baby…te amo, te amo tanto and i wanna be here for you, i wanna help you mi vida” his lips gently touched your head “i wanna help you feel better, i wish i could take your own pain away…i wanna be the one fighting your battles, i wanna be here for you…”

his words cut deeper than a knife.

he loved you too much to see you suffering like that.

“i just wanna love myself…and it’s tiring, it’s tiring not being able to accept who you are. i wanna love me, i wanna look at myself in the mirror and say how pretty i am, i wanna fucking love myself but i can’t…” your truth coming out.

“it will take time baby, it will take time but you are not alone in this…i wanna help you, i wanna show you how beautiful you are, how deserving you are…you’re everything i want, everything i need and i can help you. you wanna lose weight? okay, but we’re gonna do it healthily, together. you wanna work out? i can show you…please don’t hurt yourself again like this. i hate seeing you suffering and hurting” he tried to smile with you but he couldn’t help the tears flowing down his face.

you were at loss of words “okay…okay, together” you whispered, trying not to choke on your own sobs.

“together baby…” he whispered kissing your head, making you smile against his skin “te amo mi vida, te amo” he smiled, leaving more kisses down your face, making you chuckle.

and damian kept his promise. no matter how busy he was with work, how tired he was after a long work out. he was there step by step with you. he worked out with you. he cooked dinner with you. he helped you relax and he helped you listen to your body. he broke the scale you had in your bathroom, saying how you didn’t need one because changes weren’t a number.

you didn’t need a number to tell you what you wanted to hear, you needed to hear it from inside - the growth, the healthy progress you made. all thanks to damian, the man you loved the most.

[perryrata]

hello, i have a question for you: on your youtube it says that "I am not your friend nor will I ever be your friend: you DONT know me and I DONT know you."

so can we still talk to you ?because i've always been told that you make friends with people by talking to them but if you cannot be anyone's friends then we cannot talk to you??? but then you have asks open so is it fine for me to ask this to begin with? what are the rules of talking to you, because some other people also sent asks, so the asks can only be about life series and hermitcraft?

sorry if the queries are annoying i need hard clarification for everything (i'm also neurodivergent)

Sensitive topic below, mentions of grooming.

Phew.. alrighty.. buckle in! (Remember, I am a minor) Yes, you may speak to me, just not about personal things. Some examples from the past: people asking in comments on how my day went; what grade I got on a quiz, and venting to me on streams. It’s there to discourage these extremely uncomfortable parasocial relationships.

From a viewers perspective, I shouldn’t be anything more than an artist that loves pistachio ice cream. I shouldn’t be viewed as a friend. You truly don’t know who I am, what I’ve done or been through; and the same for vice versa.

It’s also for safety; if someone is impersonating me and messaging viewers: it’s not me(unless of course you are also an artist and we’re doing a collab). I’ve just been very aware of the threat of grooming. Although I’ve been silent about it, I have been groomed.

It’s why I made my PerryRata account. To disassociate myself from the people who knew my other accounts. Legally, we are trying to get the monster behind bars, but because the police want an easy case: they really haven’t done shit.

So, the closer I get to random people on the internet: the more worried I get about the threat. From both sides: people impersonating me and grooming impressionable folk; and people getting close to me and then taking advantage of me.

I’d just rather have it be about my art, others art, Life Series, and Hermitcraft.

All of this is meant in an informative way, I don’t blame you for asking! ❤️

I’m still going to play games with chat, interact with peeps etc.. just remember, just because you’ve played Roblox with me, doesn’t mean you know me.

[vergilscatgirl]

── .✦ Crystal Clear Tears ☆

𖥻 Pairings ; V/GN Reader, Vergil/GN Reader.

𖥻 Content Warnings ; Heavy, heavy angst, very much Hurt/Comfort, with a side of a dreadful but hopeful ending. As a fair warning, I did tear up and nearly out-right bawled writing this. Proceed carefully if you’re sensitive to heavier topics.

𖥻 A/N ; I’ve been sick, and I also have been struggling a lot recently with writer’s block and creative burnout. I wrote something to get my emotions out, and this is what I threw together. I’m aware it’s not of my usual quality and it’s also really emotional and angsty, and I apologize.

V was Vergil, and Vergil was V. The blend between the two was mere coincidence, for they were nowhere near similar in your eyes.

For the two to co-exist would be utter foolishness, as V was a fragment, a fragment of him—a fragment of his humanity, his ever-seeking soul in chase of a concept he would never grasp. To be human was to be of emotion, of human blood, of beauty and grace that he never sought for. The blood within Vergil’s veins was not of mankind, but of a sacred creation—and to seek out his divine power was his very reason to live, to breathe, to exist. V mattered not within his plans, so why must you have grown so infatuated with him. Why did your eyes seek out his? Why did your hands reach out to his, grasping and pulling the remains of his humanity from within? Why did he find himself wishing for your love, your happiness? And what could he do to rid himself of such unnecessary suffering that was humanity and its love for others?

Glossy eyes meet a pale, viridescent gaze. It was though time reached a stand-still. Crystal clear tears blend within the rain, the clouds melting away at the sight of sunlight, your shoes scratching against drenched concrete when you broke out into a run, arms encircling you so sweetly. The tears come, and they don’t stop as you unwind within his embrace. V was Vergil, and Vergil was V—and yet the two could co-exist. The mending of aged wounds, the loss and destruction faded away into the past. Vergil was human, for the blood in his veins were of sacred creation—of humanity, of grace, and of life. Vergil was a demon, for the blood in his veins were of dim creation—of destruction, of loss, and of death.

Crystal clear rain blends within the tears.

“Oh my sweet Sparrow, how I have missed you.” The voice is as smooth as silk. “To think I’d never see you again, it ruined me—but to have you in my embrace once more is a blessing from the heavens.” It mattered not to him the water that soaked his ebony coat, his arms remained locked around you in a tight grip, as if he never wanted to release his hold on you.

His words were true, and his actions spoke more. The rain poured, lightning painting the open skies with a brilliant array of purple and blue, and yet his grasp still remained. He held onto you until he could not no more—and it was until the clouds had cleared, the rain had stopped, and the wind had chilled—his grip on you lightened, until it was gone. You sit there, grieving, eyes met drying concrete. You sniffle, you cry, you sob, you pant, you shake.

“It’s going to rain again,” the icy voice speaks from above. You know it’s time to go. “I’m aware you miss him, but we must leave, and it’s best to not return.” You reached up, hand encasing his own. Vergil stared, gaze softened for a moment.

He is V, and V is him. He is human, and humanity is him—for he found the beauty and grace within the world he once denied. For he found his grace with you, his meaning, his purpose.

You were his humanity, and he was yours.

[cal-flakes]

╰┈➤ getting caught with rafe

warnings: smut, a lot of swearing.

summary: y/n maybank gets caught with rafe cameron, by her brother.

“nobody’s home rafe, it’ll be fun!” y/n gleamed, dragging her reluctant boyfriend by the arm. branches and leaves crunched underneath their feet as the trampled through the cut. rafe cameron did not want to be walking through this side of the island, but after a minor spat about rafe having never been to his girlfriends house, he agreed.

“im not sure if you’re forgetting princess, but there’s a reason we’ve never gone to your house” rafe whispered, earning a cheeky smile from her. “shh, he’s not home, he’s out with pope..” y/n uttered, praying her boyfriend won’t bolt.

it wasn’t that rafe was scared, absolutely not. rafe cameron would never run from a pogue like jj maybank. he was nervous about y/n getting in trouble. y/n and rafe had been sneaking around with eachother for a little while, having shared a blunt at a party once, leading to a very long conversation about outer space.

still being dragged along, rafe observed the girl in front of him carefully, seeing how her hand fit just right in his, watching the skip in her step as she pulled him with her.

he was in awe, he adored her to no end, to the point it unnerved him. rafe cameron couldn’t have seen this coming from a mile away, the thought of falling so hard for someone scared him to death, nevermind falling for a pogue.

over the last few weeks they had a routine going, y/n would sneak out when she knew jj was asleep and walk fifteen minutes up the road where rafe’s car would wait for her. from there they’d drive back to his place, or when they were feeling it, drive to the beach and sit there all night.

because of her, rafe’s downright hatred for pogues had softened quite a bit. taking the time to understand why she lives the way she does, why she has to work two jobs, sometimes three just to make enough money for her and jj. y/n maybank had really opened his eyes, and he secretly loved it. he was amazed by her.

“see? nobody’s home” she stated, subconsciously taking the win as she peered through the open porch. no lights, no cars. she knew jj was somewhere with pope, and would most likely crash at john b’s place. “what about your dad?” rafe asked carefully, aware of the sensitive topic. shrugging, “he’s been gone for a while, don’t know where, doubt he’ll be back anytime soon” y/n sighed, her heart hurting slightly at the thought of luke abandoning her, thought she would never admit that.

pushing the door open, she ushered rafe through and turned the hallway light on. looking around, he took notice of the various holes along the walls, a few broken pictures lay on the ground underneath them. a strange pain in his chest caught him off guard, he couldn’t explain the feeling, but he knew why.

rafe picked up the pace and hastily followed after her before she could notice he was looking. “you hungry? we probably don’t have much but i’m sure i could make you a sandwich or something, if jj hasn’t eaten everything…” y/n fidgeted with her bracelets as she rambled anxiously, now regretting her decision to bring him here. the differences between their houses was ongoing and y/n was overly aware of it in the moment.

taking hold of her cheek, rafe shushed her with a soft kiss. “i’m not hungry angel, it’s okay” he muttered, stroking her head with his fingers. nodding, she grabbed his hand again, leading him through to her room.

heading through, rafe chuckled as y/n jumped onto her bed the moment they set foot in her room. y/n’s room wasn’t big, big enough for a double bed and some bookshelves. the walls were littered with framed pictures. rafe’s lips curled slightly, threatening a small smile as he looked over the baby picture of her and her brother, pictures of her and the pogues.

wracking his brain, rafe couldn’t think of anything that would make him change his mind about her brother and his friends, but her large smiles in the photographs were enough to make him see that they were a big part of her life.

creeping behind him, y/n wrapped her arms around his torso, leaning her head on his shoulder blade as he continued looking at the contents of her room. coming round to look with him, she pointed a finger at one of the photos. “this was in the marsh i think, we were fishing through the summer and jj pushed me off the boat, a scary moment for sure because god knows what’s down there, but it was fun” she spoke quietly, a toothy smile appearing.

rafe’s eyes trailed from the photograph back to her, sucking in a breath as he stared. “you are so fucking beautiful angel..” he muttered, almost breathless.

y/n turned to face him, beaming as he looked down at her. suddenly, she latched onto him, causing them to topple and land on the bed.

giggling, she leaned down as she straddles him, planting kisses all over his chiselled face. his ring clad fingers reached up to hold her cheeks, pulling her in for a deep kiss. not breaking the kiss, his hands wandering as ground her hips onto him.

y/n moaned into rafe’s mouth, feeling his cock harden beneath her. pulling away slowly, rafe flipped them both, pinning y/n down. a torrent of whimpers left her mouth as he trailed kisses down her neck, undoing her shorts as he did.

she gripped the sheets, lifting slightly for rafe to pull down the denim bottoms. pleasurable thoughts invaded her mind, wanting nothing more than release. looking up at her, he pressed light kisses to her inner thighs, the hot air from his breath making her jolt.

the cool metal rings on his fingers added nothing but pleasure as his thumb circles her clit at a painfully slow pace. “f-fuck, rafe..please” y/n whined, intertwining her fingers with his hair, pulling slightly.

groaning as she tugged, he pushed his fingers through her folds, earning yet another breathy moan. his pace quickened as his tongue took over from his thumb, sucking softly on her clit.

the burning coil in her stomach twisted tighter and she clenched around his fingers, an early sign that she was close.

“you gonna cum for me angel? can you do that for me?” he whispered, the vibrations from his mouth sent shockwaves through her. nodding, she threw her head back, not able to suppress the noises bubbling in her throat.

a loud gasp erupted from her lips as she heard a bang outside, pushing rafe’s head away. “oh my god” she muttered in fear. rafe’s head perked up, unsure of what was going on.

“quick, get under the blanket, jj’s back” she whispered, hearing her brothers taunting footsteps in the hallway. y/n covered rafe with the sheet the best she could, lying back, nervously thinking of a plan.

“yo y/n! you in?” jj called from outside her door. “fuck” she mumbled, “y-yeah, in my room!” she answered, half praying he’d take it and leave it. before god could consider granting her wish, her bedroom door swung open, jj’s boots clunking on the floor as he stepped inside.

his eyes narrowed at the sight before him, y/n laying in bed, the blanket bundled up around her lower half. “you okay? you sick?” her brother questioned, suspicion laced in his tone. “uh, y-yeah, yeah i’m not feeling great”

“okay, you cold or something? that’s a lot of blankets y/n” jj joked, taking a step forward to prod the sheets. “no don’t touch them! i finally got comfy!” she screamed, her heart beating almost out of her chest.

“hey man, im just making sure you got enough” his brows furrowed, making the final step towards the bed, laying a hand on the mound of blankets. for a second, time seemed to slow. her eyes widened as her brothers did. he knew, and she knew that he knew.

jumping backwards with such force, knocking the photograph of her in the marsh onto the floor. “that’s a fucking person y/n, that’s not a fucking sheet!” he shouted, not knowing what to think. before she could get a word in, jj had started on a verbal rampage.

“who the fuck is under there y/n? i swear to god i’ll blow his fucking brains out!” his arms flapped around as he spoke, his anger showing through his movements.

“for fucks sake jj! get out!” she screamed at him, gesturing violently for him to leave. shaking his head, he tapped the wall beside him as if to ground himself.

“no! get out of the bed y/n! get up!” an argument ensued as rafe stayed as still as possible. he’d have jumped up by now to argue with her brother also, but he didn’t want to make things worse for her.

after a bit of back and forth, jj, fed up, went to rip the sheets away from his sister. “no! jj don’t! i’m naked!” she shrieked, pausing all movement from her brother.

the look in his eyes scared her, he looked crazy, possibly even murderous if she really squinted. “i’m not leaving this house until i find out who’s in your fucking room y/n!” jj bellowed, slamming the door behind him. “you’ll have to come out at some point! might as well get it over with!”

chest heaving, she pulled the blanket off rafe, who just smirked up at her. “i told you this was a bad idea angel” he laughed quietly, enjoying the feeling of being right, once again. “it’s not funny rafe! he’s going to kill me!” she cried, worried about her brothers reaction when his eyes meet rafe’s. shaking his head, he pecked her thigh once more. “not as long as i’m here”

after helping her get dressed, rafe pressed a kiss to her forehead as she moved slowly to the door. the door vibrated as jj knocked on it. “i’m waiting y/n”

this was it. this was the moment her brother would finally snap.

opening the door slowly, y/n couldn’t meet her brothers gaze as his eyes travelled from his sister to the man in her room. for a moment he said nothing, almost hyperventilating as his blood boiled.

“rafe? you’re sleeping with rafe cameron?!” he shouted, causing his sister to jump at the sudden noise.

as if to anger him further, rafe stood tall behind y/n, hands on her waist as he stared her brother down, egging him on to make a move.

the bad blood between the two was incomprehensible, unfixable, unchanging. she could think of so many words to describe the mutual hatred between them.

jj shook in his place, seething. if his sister wasn’t standing right in front of him, he would’ve went for rafe by now.

“jj! stop! he’s not what you think!” y/n pleaded, desperate for him to understand. the taken aback look on his face said it all. “not what i think? not what i fucking think?! he’s dangerous y/n! you need to stay away from him!”

rafe stayed quiet, knowing how upset she would be if he made any advances. his fingers dig into her side as he listened to the insults spewing from her brothers mouth, struggling to keep his cool.

“no he’s not jj! he’s so sweet and kind to me! you wouldn’t get it!” she retorted, growing tired of brothers anger.

worried about what he might do, given the chance, jj stopped shouting. “you know what, I can’t even fucking look at you right now y/n”

before she could plead with him, he’d stormed out of the house, taking his forever packed bag with him, a sign he wasn’t returning that night.

“shh baby, i’ve got you, it’s okay” rafe cooed, pulling her into him, her tears staining his top.

part two <3

[whereireid]

* ੈ✩‧₊˚ — 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐁𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐒, 𝐁𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐒 - 𝐀𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐣𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲

— warnings: nsfw content ! threesome, established relationship [quaritch's human mate] fingering, oral sex [m recieving], p in v, creampie. PSA: YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN MEDIA CONSUMPTION. THIS CONTENT IS CONSIDERED MATURE. 18+ ! If any of these topics trigger you, please do not indulge in this content! please dni - this content is 18+ and is under my #WOMNSFW tag.

-

Warmth licks at your skin like an open flame. Hands that are not yours touch your body, brush over your curves like they’ve known you forever. It’s been a while since you’ve felt like this - so utterly exposed, so violated, and yet so attended to. The mellow breeze from your compromised position on the seashore brushes coldly against your breasts, and you groan as a finger glides over your already hard nipple, pinching at the sensitive bud softly.

“You been thinkin’ bout me, sweet girl?” Jake asks from above you, and you assume that it’s his fingers which are softly trailing over your breasts, rolling your nipple between his thumb and index finger skillfully. 

You’re warm. So warm. Cozy and comfortable, having been softly placed into the sand on your hand and knees. Exposed. Ready. Wanting. Positioned between two avatars, whose bodies are so disproportionately large compared to yours. Goosebumps lick at every inch of your skin as your mate, who sits behind you - legs on either side of yours - gently slides a finger through your slits, grinning to himself as your body jolts at the unexpected touch.

“Oh, she most certainly has been thinkin' bout you,” Quaritch drawls, speaking for you as he parts your slits softly, blowing cool air against your cunt. It sends a shock throughout your system, similar to that if you were just thrown into freezing water. “This little bunny’s been so busy, ruttin’ against me like the horny little thing she is, all whilst thinkin’ of you.”

For once, Quaritch is not manhandling you. Rather, he's being gentle, watching carefully as you’re being played with by someone you originally thought to be his rival. Jake is so soft with you - so delicate, as though you could break if handled too harsh. As though you are fine china, porcelain; a flower that has begun to wilt. He is all too aware of your small, human frame, and how easily you could break if pushed too hard. Jake presses a soft kiss to your head, his hands cupping your breasts carefully, letting out a soft hum of approval as your face flushes with warmth.

“You’re a lucky man,” Jake breathes, and Quartich simply shrugs from behind you, his finger gliding up your slick, before toying with the hole of your cunt. You mewl pathetically - buck your hips against him, but he simply moves his fingers away. God damnit. “The perfect little mate. I bet she dotes on your every need.”

Jake’s eyes are so dilated that you can only just see the sunset yellow of his eyes. His pupils are so blown, so focused on you as his hands trail up from your chest to your lips, his thumb softly entering your mouth, darting the digit across your teeth. They're so dull compared to his, not sharp at all, not dangerous. And whilst he doing this - toying with your mouth, making sure you suck on his thumb pathetically - Quaritch is sliding two fingers inside of your cunt, ears twitching eagerly as you moan heartily at his intrusion.

Quaritch nudges your legs slightly farther apart, whistling in approval as he stares down at your glistening cunt. “You’re right. She’s just the most perfect little mate. Gives me everything I ask for. Ain’t that right, pretty girl?” He calls from behind you, satisfied as you nod your head eagerly. Quaritch’s fingers curl inside of you, the blue skin of his fingers glistening with your slick. “So, I thought it was only fair to give her what she wants. I’m good like that, huh, bunny?”

You hum in response because you can’t actually speak. Physically, you're unable to string together a coherent sentence, rather opting to suck on Jake’s digits needily, watching as his eyelids flutter shut lustfully as he slowly glides his fingers in and out of your mouth. “How good is she at sucking cock, Quaritch?” Jake asks, flattening his fingers on your tongue and forcing them further down your mouth, humming as your throat constricts around him.

“Oh, I’d say pretty damn good,” your mate says, smiling as you buck against him needily. Quaritch’s fingers feel so good as they curl inside of you, brushing deliciously against the sensitive spot inside of your cunt. “But she ain’t really one for suckin’ on her own accord. She likes it when you use her like a little whore, fuck her throat like she ain't good for nothin' else. Don’t you, darlin’?”

And as if to agree with him, you wiggle your ass eagerly, pathetically, and Quaritch coos in response. His fingers work inside of you effortlessly, yet so wonderfully - nudging against the sensitive spot in your cunt with every curl of his fingers, and you can’t help but clench down around him. It feels perfect - feels so good to be used like this.

Your stomach flutters slightly as Quaritch curls his fingers against you again, fucking your cunt with his digits eagerly, and he chuckles, mockingly. “She’s gonna cum all over my fingers. Take a good look at her when she does,” he says, ears pinning backwards as you clench down around him again. So tight that it’s hard to keep rolling his fingers back and forth, but it’s somehow still manageable, and your belly floods with warmth, your legs beginning to tremble.

It would be so hard to keep yourself upright if you didn’t have Jake and Quaritch either side of you - they support you as your body begins to grow weightless and you cry out, your cum painting Quaritch’s fingers, a ring of white arousal forming around of his knuckles.

He doesn’t have to fuck you through it. He doesn’t even try. You bounce on his fingers, roll your hips against them, all whilst greedily sucking Jake’s digits, your eyelashes batting up at him, your eyes wide and starry.

“She ready yet?” Jake asks, not really concerned about whether or not you are ready anymore, because he is so hard that he actually hurts. And Quaritch watches on - amused, as you bounce on his fingers like the desperate bunny you are, unaware that Jake’s loincloth is now abandoned to the floor, his cock now pressed against the side of your face.

“She was ready weeks ago.”

The affirmation is enough for Jake. He draws his fingers out from your mouth, and you gaze at him hazily, pouting, your eyes still starred over and dazed from where Quaritch had forced an orgasm out of you. And Jake’s eyes trail over towards the other man - who's watching him lazily, his fingers still set in the same position, your hips grinding so your cunt can glide up and down his digits.

Your tongue comes out to slide against the tip of Jake’s cock when he slaps it against your face. It’s different to Quaritch’s - slightly smaller, but slightly girthier, and it appears to be more ribbed. But the color is the exact same - the tip is purple, faint dribbles of pre-cum leaking from it, before the skin begins to transcend into a blue, which is just a slightly lower hue than the rest of Jake's skin.

“Quaritch,” you murmur, your stomach growing fuzzy as you still your hips, your lips peppering soft kisses against Jake’s length in between your speech. “Want you inside of me.”

“I’m inside of you, bunny.”

His fingers curl inside of you in a deliberate, sleazy motion, and your body jolts slightly in response, and your nose nuzzles against Jake’s cock. “No. Want your cock.”

“Yeah, bunny? Want my cock fucking your cunt whilst Jake’s cock fucks your face?”

“Yes please, sir.”

“Well, shit,” Quartitch drawls, a chuckle rumbling in his chest as he complies, pulling his fingers out of your cunt with a satisfying squelch, “how am I supposed to say no when you ask me so nicely, bunny?”

It happens all at once. Like they’re planning it - and maybe they are, but maybe they’re not, and to be honest you don’t really care. Quaritch glides into you easily, and your cunt flutters against him - clenching down on him so tightly that his balls actually twitch, ready to spill his cum already. He hasn’t fucked you in days, wanting you to be prepared and ready for today. Jake stares down at you, his eyes softening slightly as he fucks into your throat - no longer caring about whether or not it feels good for you.

Because Jake has been doting and caring, and soft. He’s loosened up your throat, got your mouth nice and wet for him, and now it’s time for him to treat you like how you want him to treat you.

Like a hole.

“So tight, bunny. This pretty little pussy of yours is milkin’ me dry already and I ain’t been inside of you that long,” Quaritch laughs, his cock rutting into you at a steady, smooth pace, ears twitching as he listens to the sound of your squelching cunt echo around the seashore, muffled slightly by the waves. “You're such a dirty little bunny, gaggin’ all up on that cock whilst you're squelchin' all round mine."

Holy shit, your throat hurts. Jake’s balls slap wetly against your chin, and it feels so degrading. Your spit is painting the skin of his cock a hue lighter, and you begin to grow dizzy as he uses you, unable to breathe. Your throat constricts around him, and Jake groans, his eyes blown and dark, your fingers splayed on his thighs in an attempt to push him away. Their pace is the same - the motion and speed of their hips is the exact fucking same. With each thrust of Quartich’s hips, you’re pushed closer toward Jake's, and you choke around him, your throat practically swallowing him, mouth stretched as you struggle to take his girth.

“You're such a sweet girl, letting me use your mouth like this,” Jake grunts, strings of incoherent curses spilling past his lips as he takes you, his tail thrashing softly behind him. “Takin’ me so good.”

You are taking him so well. You're taking both of them so well, and you're not used to being taken like this. Your stomach flutters with warmth as Quaritch rolls his hips, his cock fucking into your sensitive cunt, uncaring as you clench around him. He simply observes, watching as Jake intrusively fucks your mouth, watching as you drown in his cock and your own spit. You take Jake all in and you look a mess - a crying, shaking mess, and you buck your hips in an attempt to get away from your mate’s rutting hips. 

But Quaritch’s grip on you is so tight, so possessive, that you don’t stand a chance of getting away. Oh, no, no, no - you wanted this. You were the one biting your lip and fiddling with your hair as you were telling Quaritch all about how you kept dreaming about Jake Sully fucking you just like Quaritch does.

So, you’re going to take it. You’re a fluttery mess, floating on cloud nine, gagging and choking and whining. Quartich fucks you hard, his eyes fluttering shut as he listens to your squelching cunt and the moans which slip past your lips.

You feel stuffed. Quartich degradingly spits on your cunt, his fingers rolling against your clit, pinching the sensitive nub softly. And your hips shudder, which only makes your cunt tighten against him more. You’re so tight against him, and his rolling hips feel so good and perfect that your belly begins to drown with warmth. You are drowning in the heat from both of their bodies, and your eyes prickle with tears as the slap noises from Jake's balls hitting your soppy chin echo around the seashore.

"You’re takin’ me so good, sweet girl," Jake reiterates, watching silent tears fall from your eyes. They’re enjoying this as much as you are - Quaritch, who is usually so possessive that he’d kill a man for even looking at you, is watching eagerly as your throat is fucked ruthlessly by Jake fucking Sully. 

Your mate groans, his eyes flickering down to watch your ring of arousal stain his blue cock white. You’re so perfect, taking him so well. He glides a hand under your stomach, hissing as he feels his cock intrusively press against your navel slightly because he’s just that big, and he presses sloppy, deliberate kisses against your back. "Bunny, baby, look at me, not at him," he grunts, groaning as you gaze at him with teary, cock-drunk eyes, your thighs shaking slightly as he rolls his hips against you. "That's it - oh that's my good little bunny. You like gagging on Jake's cock, baby?"

"Uh-huh," you murmur, and it's the only thing you can manage to squeeze out that isn't a moan or a squeak. Your throat feels so sore, so used, and yet you want more - you want Jake to cum and paint your tongue white with his thick, ropey seed.

You want it so badly. Quaritch coos as your thighs begin to shake against him. It's too much - it's all too much, and your lower belly floods with warmth as they take you, as they chase their own pleasure rather than focusing on yours - and you feel it coming. The coil pulls so tight that it snaps, and you cry out, your throat feeling abused as Jake speeds up. Your core floods with warmth, your clit throbbing and twitching as Quaritch rolls the sensitive bud through his fingers skillfully, your cunt clenching as you cum against Quaritch, hard, crying out in bliss.

“Good girl, yeah, cum all over me, bunny." Quaritch says, grinding his teeth together as he fucks your cunt more selfishly, groaning as your body falls limp and you struggle to hold yourself up as a result of your orgasm. "You gonna let your daddy cum in you? Gonna let him full you up same time Jake does?”

You hum, and it sends a vibration shooting across Jake’s cross. He groans, his hands slipping in your hair slightly. “Can I cum in your mouth, sweet girl?” Jake asks, ever-so-nicely, his eyes starry and wide, and how on Earth can you say no when he looks as pretty as he does? You flicker your tongue against his long, veiny shaft eagerly, and Jake groans, gliding in and out of your mouth quickly, his cock twitching until he’s pumping his thick, hot cum down your throat.

Quaritch watches. His hips roll into yours eagerly, his eyes not straying to watch your puffy pussy leak, but rather, he watches as you choke around Jake’s cock, the Na’vi wiping any excess from your lips and forcing it into your mouth. He’s so close - brushing against the sensitive spot inside of you constantly, having him clench down on you, and Quaritch's eyelids flicker shut because holy shit, you’re really deadset on milking him dry.

You cry out as Quaritch's hips roll into you once more before he stills, his body crushing yours. Legs weak, you shudder, with now only Jake keeping you up from completely melting into the ground. You feel your mate's cock twitch inside of you - feel him paint your walls with his thick, ropey seed, and a broken mewl slips past your lips as you pathetically pull Jake's cock out of your mouth.

"Oh sweet girl, you did so good," Jake coos from above you, wiping your teary eyes and spit-stained face. His cock is still hard, pressed against your cheek, but genuine concern warps his features, and his touch is soft, gentle, and borderline doting. "You took me so well."

"She liked takin' it, didn't you, bunny?" Quaritch asks, his hand palming your hand roughly, gliding out of your cunt, and watching as his cum seeps out of your hole and drips onto the sandy beach.

"I loved it, sir," you murmur, your voice hoarse and broken, and you nuzzle your head closer to Jake's thighs, breathing in his hearty scent. "Every minute."

"Yeah?" Quaritch raises a brow, parting your slits with his fingers so he can get a proper view of your pussy pumped full of his seed. "Well then, Jake, we might have to do this more often. What bunny wants, bunny gets."

[justabigassnerd]

Protective Friend

Pairing - Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell x daughter!reader

Word count - 2,182

Warnings - physical violence, mentions of cheating, blood, angst, mentions of Goose, fluff

Summary - after someone picks on Bradley one too many times, you handle the situation and secretly impress your father

A/N - it's been a minute huh, y'all? I think I'm doing a bit better (no promises), so maybe I'll be uploading more fics. anyway I won't bore y'all with a long A/N so as per y'all, please send in requests, feedback, and enjoy

Growing up alongside the Bradshaw family, it was basically inevitable that you would become best friends with Bradley Bradshaw. After all, you’d practically known the family since birth with your dad working alongside your Uncle Goose and it had devastated you when Goose died, understanding the finality of it all even at a young age. After Goose passed you made even more of an effort to be a good friend to Bradley, doing your best to keep a smile on his face.

However, the kids at your school were not nearly as kind. They had found out that Goose had died one day during an activity in the build-up to the summer holidays where your teacher gave you the freedom to make Father’s Day cards to store somewhere safe until the day came and Bradley had innocently asked your teacher what he was supposed to do. When the teacher had crossed the room to crouch down alongside him to ask why he couldn’t write a card for his dad, some kids had overheard him saying that his dad was dead and apparently thought it was the funniest thing to them. The teasing started off light before it got worse, but you could tell it bothered Bradley all the same, especially given the sensitivity of the topic. You ended up telling your dad about the teasing and bullying and without hesitation, Maverick had gone straight to Carole to make sure she was aware as well. Carole, of course, wasted no time going to the principal and telling him about how he needs to be doing better in making sure the bullies get punished.

When the principal did nothing about it, nonchalantly saying he couldn’t control kids’ actions, Carole went and tracked down the parents of the kids who were picking on Bradley after you gave them their names. Once again, Carole reached a brick wall as when she spoke to the various parents of the kids, they just shrugged her off and said that both Bradley and Carole needed to stop being so sensitive over something that happened years ago and that a bit of friendly teasing wasn’t hurting anyone so according to them, Bradley simply had to man up and learn how to take a joke. It took everything within Carole not to slap anyone when she heard the same answer multiple times. Her son was being bullied and no one was doing anything about it when this was the time to step up and do something. She didn’t care if had been ten minutes or ten years since Goose’s passing, he was still Bradley’s father, and her son was allowed to mourn the loss he suffered.

When Carole next met up with Maverick and filled him in on what had happened, Maverick immediately offered to give it a try himself, more than willing to be assertive and to even drag Iceman into it if needed. Carole told Maverick not to worry about it, and that he probably wouldn’t get much further than she did, even with Iceman.

“Do you want me to sleep with their wives?” Maverick had jokingly suggested which resulted in Carole hiding her giggle as she lightly slapped Maverick on the shoulder.

“You wouldn’t dare.” She replied, continuing to laugh as Maverick shrugged jokingly.

“All I’m saying is I could give them the best night of their lives, end it then and there and then ruin their marriage. That’ll teach them for picking on Bradley.” Maverick says nonchalantly, leaning back against the sofa with a grin.

“Mav, I love you, but no you can’t ruin people’s marriages over this.” Carole says as Maverick holds his hands up in mock surrender, both of them chuckling lightly.

“It was a good idea though.”

A couple of days later, one Saturday morning, you managed to coerce Maverick into taking you to the local playground and when you asked if Bradley could come with you and so he walked you over to the house just down the road and asked Carole if Bradley wanted to come to the park with the two of you. Carole was of course extended an invitation to join you all, but she politely declined, saying she had housework she needed to do. Now with Bradley in tow, the three of you make your way to the park, entering the gated park and both of you immediately head over to the swings while Maverick sits himself on a bench just outside of the park, watching you play with a soft smile.

However, at the most crucial moment, Maverick found himself distracted by a pair of attractive women who smiled flirtatiously at him as they passed, deciding that since both you and Bradley were happily playing in the park, he had the perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation with them.

In the park, a boy that was in your grade named Johnny decided he wanted to pick on Bradley, calling over to him and once again picking on him for the fact his dad was dead the moment, he realised you had crossed the park to talk to another one of your friends.

“Stop it.” Bradley said firmly, standing from the swing and attempting to stand up for himself against the bullies.

“What are you going to do? Tell your dad?” Johnny said before eyeing the way Bradley’s hand clenched around something hanging on his chest.

“What’s that?” He then asked teasingly, eyes glinting with glee as Bradley took a step back, fist tightening around the dog tags that once belonged to his dad. With nothing more than a look exchanged between them, Johnny’s two friends put a hand on Bradley’s shoulders and forced him to the floor, while Johnny pried Bradley’s hand open and removed the precious dog tags from around his neck, inspecting them and chuckling to himself.

“Goose? What kind of stupid name is that?” Johnny says, reading the callsign displayed on the tags.

“Give them back!” Bradley cries out, attempting to get up and grab his dog tags but Johnny’s friends were quicker, forcing down on his shoulders harder to prevent him from moving.

Across the park, you had heard Bradley’s demand and so glanced over and immediately removed yourself from your conversation and immediately rushed over to Bradley’s defence, taking less than a second to realise what it was Johnny had stolen.

“Give it back, Johnny!” You say firmly, holding your hand out expectantly and gritting your teeth when Johnny just laughs in your face.

“And why would I do that?” He taunts, sniggering as he glances over at his friends who laugh too.

“Because you’re not going to like what I’m going to do next.”

Just as Maverick was bidding goodbye to the two women, making sure to give each of them a cheeky wink as they went, he turned to look back at the park and instead came face to face with a rageful-looking mother who had a boy alongside her who was holding a tissue up to his bleeding nose.

“What do you have to say for yourself?” The woman all but yells in Maverick’s face, barely giving him space to breathe, let alone process what she is saying.

“I’m sorry, what?” Maverick says, trying his best to calm the tension. He had recognised the kid instantly; you had pointed him out to your dad one afternoon when you had first told him about the bullying.

“Your brat of a daughter punched my sweet Johnny for no reason! I can’t believe you’d raise a child to think that’s okay.” The mother says, glaring at Maverick who takes a moment to glance over at you where you were crouching down alongside Bradley, clearly talking to him before taking a moment to look over at your dad with a worried expression.

“y/n wouldn’t hit someone.” Maverick says, getting up from the bench to be more level with the woman.

“She punched him!” She repeats, even louder and begins to get looks from people surrounding them.

“Okay, okay, cool your jets. I’ll speak to her.” Maverick says, waving his hand dismissively before crossing to the park gate, opening it and catching your eye before gesturing you over and waiting patiently for you to approach.

“Hi, dad.” You mumble, glancing down at your shoes to avoid looking Maverick in the eye.

“Hey squirt. So, I heard you punched that Johnny kid. Want to tell me what happened?” Maverick says, crouching down to be at your level and gently encouraging you to look at him. You mumbled something in response but none of it was audible to him.

“You gotta speak up kiddo.” Maverick encourages gently, reaching out and resting a hand on your shoulder and squeezing lightly, silently promising you he wouldn’t get upset.

“He took Uncle Goose’s dog tags from Bradley.” You say, a little louder so that Maverick can hear you. Upon hearing the reason you had lashed out; Maverick knew he couldn’t be mad at you at all, but he also knew he had to try and dissuade you from using violence in the future.

“Okay, sweetheart, you can’t punch people. I understand why you did it but if you’re ever in a situation like this, you come and get me, Carole, Ice, whoever. We’ll sort it out. I’m sure you did try but make sure you use your words. Punching people isn’t okay, no matter what it is they do.” Maverick says softly, watching as you carefully take in his words, nodding softly.

“Yes, daddy.” You say before Maverick gently pulls you into a hug.

“Go and grab Bradley and get ready to head back home. I’ll speak to Johnny’s mother.” Maverick says quietly before releasing you from the hug, letting you go over to Bradley then standing up and heading back over to Johnny and his mother.

“I didn’t see you disciplining your daughter. How do you know she won’t do it again?” Johnny’s mother says firmly, gripping her son’s shoulder and pulling him closer to emphasise the injury.

“I spoke to her, and she knows it’s wrong. But she did tell me that your son took something that was special to not only Bradley, but his family and my family too. And when your son clearly refused to give it back, she did what she thought she had to do. She won’t do it again, but I won’t say she wasn’t justified.” Maverick explains, folding his arms across his chest and raising an eyebrow as he anticipates her freakout.

“She hurt my son and you’re saying it’s justified?” The shock and horror was painted all over her face as she yelled at Maverick.

“I’m not going to lie to you and say she wasn’t justified in what she did. Your kid stole something special from Bradley and has been bullying him for a while. You have refused to teach your kid better so no I will not punish her for standing up for her friend.” Maverick says firmly, deciding then and there that the conversation is over and turning to find you and Bradley.

“Come on you two, we’re heading home!” Maverick calls over to you and Bradley and when you and Bradley rush over to him, he wraps an arm around each of your shoulders and ushers you away from the woman and her son and begins the walk home. First, you drop Bradley off at his house, both of you greeting Carole as she opens the door. Just before Bradley heads inside, and while Maverick is explaining what happened earlier to Carole, Bradley turns to face you with a small smile.

“Thank you for getting my dog tags back.” Bradley says softly, making you smile before hugging Bradley.

“You don’t need to thank me.” You insist gently, squeezing Bradley softly before releasing him from the hug and letting him head inside with Carole while Maverick wraps an arm around your shoulders and encourages you to head home with him.

When you make it home, Maverick guides you into the living room and asks you to stay put while he grabs you an icepack. He soon returns with an icepack in hand, sitting down alongside you and taking the hand you had punched Johnny with and placing the icepack on the knuckles, biting back a frown when you wince slightly.

“This should help with any swelling.” Maverick says tenderly, his voice quiet as he lets you hold the icepack in place.

“Are you mad at me?” You question quietly, eyes fixed on the icepack to avoid looking at your dad.

“No sweetheart, I’m not mad. I do wish you had handled it a little differently, but I can’t be mad at you for standing up for Bradley.” Maverick admits, watching as you finally get the courage to look up at him.

“I wish I didn’t punch him. But it was satisfying.” You say quietly, a shy smile covering your face as Maverick lets out a soft chuckle before carefully pulling you into a hug.

“Well between me and you. I think he had it coming.”