#I’ll probably post like a whole week of fics before I do more polls like this every month

[crystal-overdrive]

Towards Tyranny Post Mortem

I put it to a poll whether folk wanted to read my thoughts on TT now I've finished it and you said yes, so here it is! Under the cut, 1675 words. Perhaps some minor spoilers but I don't outright say what the ending is.

PROCESS

Towards Tyranny was my first piece of fanfiction and my first long-form piece of prose. I worked on Towards Tyranny for ten months, at a rate of a chapter or 2 -4l per week. I was surprised at my ability to continue a project for this long, as by three months I’m normally chomping at the bit when I’m working on other forms of writing. I think releasing serially and getting constant feedback was a huge motivator I wanted to give my audience something every week and I looked forwards to what hey had to say. I’m not sure I could have written the whole thing by myself without showing it to anyone.

Unlike how I normally work, Towards Tyranny was not edited. It would have taken me about double the time if I’d edited, and editing chapter-by-chapter isn’t particularly helpful to me, as I tend to do a structural and character pass before delving into line edits. I think my writing must have improved over the course of this project, as I don’t believe it is too noticeable that the first ten or so chapters have about four rounds of editing, and subsequent chapters have none. So that’s nice!

Plotting and outlining was pretty odd on this project. I am normally very much a planner, but the fic diverged from the original outline very quickly. At points I abandoned the outline and went chapter-by-chapter. I did make (several) more outlines during writing, but the main purpose of these was to prove that the work could actually be finished than a guideline for writing. Having a bit of room for the characters to speak for themselves was a good thing, and I think this has taught me that I can relax a little with my outlining and still complete long projects.

The pace I wrote this at was reasonable, but it was only possible because I didn’t have a full time job. I “stole” time from uni, and during September and October worked on it full time to get finished. One thousand words a day is my full time pace which, while comparable with professionals, seems to pale in comparison to other fic writers. With any luck I’ll have a full time job soon, and I think on top of working, a reasonable pace for outside writing projects is something like 1k a week. That means I probably won’t be writing a longfic like this again. If I do write something of this size it will probably be an original. I’ve proven to myself I can write at length, and I’d like the challenge of original work.

This doesn’t mean I’m done with fandom, it’s just more likley to be the odd one shot when I feel inspired rather than anything big.

PACING AND STRUCTURE

I think it is evident from the text that my outline was changing during writing, as the structure is odd at times. It feels like the front half is all romance, the back half all plot, and then there’s almost a resolution which is undone by my subversive ending. The way Towards Tyranny ends is pretty typical of my work, but I think part of me was channelling the frustration I felt with the project into the characters motivations by the end. Perhaps a more simple romance ending without The Cell or Astarion/Gasper would have made for a stronger ending.

If I was to do a structural edit, I would either remove or make more of the political plotline. The Hand of Baldur goes nowhere, so I’d either add that in or replace it with the Drains and Underways, because they essentially did what Tav suggested the Hand of Baldur would do in that parliament session. I’d also make more of Jannath considering where she ends up. These are fairly minor things to catch in a structural edit, but for a released work they’re not great. This is just a hazard of releasing serially and changing the outline as I went!

Another issue I have with the political plotline is that it often develops between chapters. I thought writing it was boring, and therefore reading it would be. This means we get a lot of telling not showing in regards to Tav’s poltical prowess. If I had leaned in here and done more political chapters though, the work would have been so long, and it would have veered even further from romance as a genre.

One thing I think I do do well with is foreshadowing and setting up characters and mysteries. This was less deliberate planning, and more “I need a character, guess I’ll pull a name I’ve used before”, but it worked. There is also a lot of nice dramatic irony on a second read — I particularity liked Enver telling Tav he “had to have her before she took the Gate from him” in chapter two. Like, you STUPID man, if you’d have left her alone she’d have been no threat! I

Generally, while too much happens off screen and the structure is a little odd, every plot point feel like it is set up and paid off, and we have a cohesive main plot in the Bane storyline. And the Bane storyline is kind of the big gotcha here. Towards Tyranny isn’t really a romance. The real story is about Bane and Tav’s decent into religious fascism, but that wasn’t my original intent, and it wasn’t until about chapter ten that I actually figured that out. If this was an original and I was writing to market, I’d probably be looking at turning it into a political fantasy with a romance B plot rather than the other way around.

In terms of pacing, the political plots are fine, but the romance pace is a bit weird. We got from quite tame flirting to really quite sexual advances in chapter ten which was faster than made sense on a second reading. Again, if I was to edit, I’d add another romantic scene before it that started to cross the line. I would also add another sex or romance scene before the final chapter that demonstrates that while the power dynamics have changed, Enver and Tav do still love one another, because right now I feel like their feelings could be read as ambiguous at the end. Also, I just think it’s funny that they went from flirting to married in basically two weeks. Time was all over the place in the fic, and juggling a lot of plot points made it hard to manage at times.

QUALITY OF PROSE

I don’t consider prose my main form of writing, so I’m largely happy with how the prose turned out. There’s some really lovely metaphors, similes and description near the beginning that grounds the reader in Tav’s head and world. This does fall off as I stop editing and being to write faster, but in my defence, by chapter thirty, we don’t need more description of Wyrm’s Rock! Some of the description in the later chapters feels overly simplistic—more like stage direction than the sort of description and action that also conveys emotion, theme, tone etc.

While I was writing I was concerned about the overuse of things like smiling, learning, smirking, said, because I tended to use these as fillers between dialogue and they are known as somewhat annoying, but when I read back I didn’t notice it at all as a reader, and though action and dialogue flowed quite well. Nearer the end, we start to get heads talking in the void. I had purposefully used less action and dialogue tags because I had noticed that I used them more than I found them in published work. Looking at it now, I think, no, I don’t need to tag every line, but I prefer (in my own writing at least) more tags and action than less.

I am very pleased with my dialogue. I think it is natural and consistently in character. Each character has a distinct register that I am happy with.

FANFIC VS ORIGINAL

If this was an original, it would have to have been far longer. Through I do a lot of worldbuilding as far as Bane is involved, the pre-established worlds and characters do so much. Without contextt of the Gods, the cults, the adventure, it wouldn’t make sense. An original would have needed flashbacks to the adventure, or perhaps this would have to come as a part two.

I really enjoyed getting to take an established world and pick at it and expand it. By mid-way, when the main cast were mostly OCs and the story had become about my take on the cult of Bane, it felt closer to an original, but the process was still very different.

It had different motivations from writing an original piece too. While I love interacting with readers via comments, and at times it did feel like I was writing for comments, I was ultimately writing for myself, and at points as a form of therapy. During writing I went through a religious crisis, dropped out of a PhD, got engaged and dealt with a lot of family drama. Wonder where half of the plot of the fic came from…

On that note, I back and forthed a lot about whether Tav was a self-insert. She was a lot of my character traits, personality quirks, and I sort of wrote from a what-would-I-do perspective for a while. As she turned more and more evil, more of a gap formed between us, and I think that made writing harder. I started to feel uncomfortable that I had identified with a character whose morals were so unlike my own by the end. In the last few chapters I embraced Tav as not-me, just some cool evil woman, and that was better.

Overall, I’m really happy with Towards Tyranny. It’s the longest thing I’ve ever written, I feel so proud of how I committed to getting this done, and I like the end result!

[kuuderekweenfics]

Canción de Cuna

Two in one week? I’m on a roll! (Actually, I was just late to post my last fic, so I thought I’d hit ya with a double whammy.)

Well, if you wanted an emotional roller coaster, you’re in for a real treat.

Because the turmoil is strong in this one. This is a follow up to my previous Dabi fic, although you don’t necessarily have to read that one to enjoy this piece of work. 

Now that I’m three fics in, I want to start opening up the polls to you lovely readers. I don’t necessarily have to stay on the MHA/BNHA train. I’m free to venture into other territories.

I’ve been thinking about maybe a Levi from AoT/SnK fic. But we’ll see. :)

Anywaayyyssssss, back to the point of the matter:

Dabi x Female Reader

Explicit Warning: non-con, and angst sex, as well as psychological abuse and trauma. A lot of adult themes here, people. You’ve been warned. (18+)

Manga Spoilers! Not anything that hasn’t already been put out there, but if you are only watching the show, beware!

El que no sabe de amores, llorona,

no sabe lo que es martirio.

(He who does not know love, weeping woman,

does not know martyrdom.)

Tápame con tu reboso, llorona,

por que me muero de frío.

(Cover me with your shawl, weeping woman,

Because I’ll die of cold.)

He has red hair.

Your child has red hair and you’re not entirely sure you’re seeing this right because, boy, is it red. 

Like brick red. 

Like fire-truck red. 

You blink, rub your eyes, then blink again.

Not a trick of the light. It’s still very red.

Well, at least he’s no longer bald.

You lay him down in his crib, a melodic, yet cracked, lullaby stringing its way from your lips as sleep attempts to overtake you. You run a finger against his puffy cheek, and watch him breath silently. 

Up, down. Up down. 

Sometimes, you stare at his chest for several minutes at a time to make sure he’s still breathing. To make sure he’s still there. He’s a miracle; a glowing ember in the dark void from which he was borne. 

For weeks after your discovered pregnancy, you contemplated aborting. He was a product made not from love but fear. No one would blame you. But the day you heard the whirred sound of a quick and steady heartbeat, your love became boundless. And thus, you gave birth to your baby boy. 

His red hair must come from his paternal genes.

You learned a lot about his father recently. Although, you didn’t have much of a choice in the matter since he hijacked the entire broadcasting network to air out his family’s dirty laundry. If he hadn’t broken you over a year ago, you’d probably feel bad about what he went through. It sure explains a lot of those inner demons he has. 

A small part of you almost wishes that his child inherits some of that apparent intelligence he has before deciding against it altogether. You want him to be nothing like that monster. He will be a good boy. The thought of the great man he will surely become etches a smile on your face. 

You scan any signs of distress before heading back to bed. If you can manage to get in an hour of undisturbed sleep, you think you’ll be able to keep the patisserie running for a whole day tomorrow. While money isn’t necessarily tight, being a single, new mother in a bustling metropolis can be expensive. Not long after your eyes close are you alerted by a high pitched coo. He’s not crying. But he’s awake. And being awake equates to needing attention. 

You don’t register the shadow standing in the corner of his room as you make your way in, your eyes closed and only your deeply ingrained memory of the layout of the nursery to guide you to his crib. It is when your fingers meet an empty bed, growing cold from the lack of a body, do your eyes finally fly open. 

Another coo raises the hair on the back of your neck. This one is deeper, much calmer. You crank your head. Nausea creeps up, pinching every nerve in your stomach with a ferocity that leaves you quaking.

You shouldn’t be surprised to find Dabi there. Part of you had always known that he may come back. Out of sheer curiosity or some bitter resentment, perhaps. But you desperately locked the thought into the depths of your mind, hoping that he might possibly be arrested, or eradicated before then. 

He holds your child, his child, gently, a whisper of a smile almost odd against his otherwise rough demeanor. He is slightly illuminated by the blue hues coming from a small night light. Cerulean eyes flicker at you before settling back down at the small human who sleeps soundly in his arms. 

Your breathing is forced and shallow. Have you blinked? The stinging pulse at the corner of your eyes is a good indicator that maybe you should. But you don’t dare to. Not when he’s around.

“I’m surprised you kept him,” he starts, his low voice rumbling through your core. “It didn’t take long for my hounds to find you. I thought you’d at least put in a bit more effort to hide.”

The silence rings in your ears. You’re not sure if he wants a response or if this is just another villainous monologue to add to his collection. But as the seconds crawl, slow but steady, your confidence grows. You clear your throat. Did your tongue always feel this dry and heavy? You grip the crib with white knuckles. An anchor for the fury you’re about to unleash.

“You changed your hair.” 

It comes out small and tired. Of all the things you could have said, all the icy venom you could have spat at him, you decided to comment on his white hair. His. Hair. You mentally plead for a do-over, as if the earth would spin backward to take the last minute and give you another opportunity to rain hellfire. 

He smirks at you, reading your inner turmoil, but decides to drop the matter. “What have you named the twerp?”

You tell him. He nods a bit, and you wonder if it’s a mark of approval as he walks toward the crib. He leans forward to gingerly place the baby back in and you feel the tension in your body cave, your rigid muscles releasing almost sorely.

Another pregnant silence.

“Sometimes, his eyes scare me,” you admit finally, chipping away at the stifling quiet. “Not because I believe he’s capable of ever doing what you did; what you do...but because they look just like yours. And then I see you.”

He doesn’t turn to you. Doesn’t react. He keeps his attention on his child, and, for a moment, you’re not sure if he’s heard you at all. 

“Do you regret it?”

Do you regret being there that day? Do you regret not calling for backup? Do you regret keeping your child? His question can apply to so many things, but the answer to all of them remains the same. 

You look down at the sleeping boy and finally answer, “Never.”

You hadn’t noticed he closed the distance until his hand was pressed against your lower back and your lips met. 

Oh no. No, no, no. Not again. Your heart thunders in your throat as you push him away. But his other hand wrenches your arm down and he pulls you in, deepening the kiss.

A sob escapes your trembling lips. You use your free hand to grab hold of his jaw, the skin thick and scarred, and shove him from you. You reach for the baby, your alarm blaring for you to get out, to create any distance you can from the danger before you, but his arms wrap around your waist before you can attempt your escape. 

“Don’t do this,” you plead, hoping the fragment of kindness he had shown toward his son would extend to you. 

He rests his forehead in the crook of you neck and holds you tighter. You can feel him shake behind you. Is he crying? Is he remorseful?

The blood drains from you as you hear it: laughing. Softly at first, a quiet, tired chuckle cutting into the dark, turning into loud cackle which startles your son into a tearful wail. 

You reach out in a feeble endeavor to comfort him. Your hand is pushed back down by your captor. 

“He’ll be fine. I think we should focus our efforts on giving the little tyke a playmate, what do you think?” He growls into your ear. “Maybe we can try for a girl this time. She’d be pretty, like her mom.”

You swallow the hot bile back down. It’s so unfair; him speaking to you as if he’s ever the doting father, as if he was around during the most crucial moments of your pregnancy, or in the months thereafter. He threw away his opportunity of being a family man long before he met you. Not that you wanted him there at all. Another child wouldn’t change him, wouldn’t change the fact that you didn’t, had never wanted, a family with him.

You don’t know what made him decide on you. What made him believe you were the perfect candidate to bear his children? You failed at having a useful quirk for power-breeding.  You were a shell among the rest of them. How long had he wandered along the shore, surpassing all others before reaching down into the sand and picking you? 

He breathes you in, the mere scent of you encouraging his cock to harden and rub into your ass. How did you get to this point? What could you have said differently? It goes without saying that you have no means to fight. He trails wet, open-mouthed kisses along your neck and bites down on your shoulder. You hate that he elicits a shiver in response. 

You lean forward on your own, letting him rut against you as you take a pacifier and place it into your son’s mouth. 

You hum a lullaby as your shorts and panties are pulled down and fall in a heap on the floor. 

You stroke his cheek as Dabi stroke his length against you, the precum coating your folds and the tip just barely grazing your clit.

You choke down the sob as he claims you, for the second time, just as the boy slowly submerges into another warm embrace of sleep.

He grips your shoulder and drills into you, and despite not having any form of stimulation, your arousal awakens hot and electric with each pulse. You close your eyes in a vain attempt to shield your son from seeing you this way: broken and needy. 

But he’s fallen back asleep. No, what you’re really shielding yourself from is the shame enveloping you as your legs squeeze together and your back arches. Because you want Dabi to hit that spot; you want him to pound into that button that shoots a wave of pleasure up your spine and into your skull. And as his thick cock finally strikes home one, two, three times, and your pussy becomes a soppy mess, you’ve realized he’s found it. 

You let out a raspy moan. This only invites him to reach over and rub your clit.

How embarrassing. How unbelievably mental you are. You bite down on your bottom lip, hard enough to taste a metallic tanginess. You just hope he decides against his previous notions and pulls out at the last moment. 

But It’s different from before. He holds you close, bending down and grabbing the crib’s railing with one hand and tucking the strands of your hair behind your ear with the other before bringing it back down again to play with your bundle of nerves as he whispers obvious fantasies against your cheek. 

Teaching his son how to control his quirk.

Learning how to braid his daughter’s hair.

The tears fall freely from you now. Because each dream sounds so perfect. So delightful. But that’s all it will ever be. A dream, wrapped nicely with a polka-dot bow. Because Dabi cannot be the man of your dreams. Not when he’s stolen so much from you already. Not when he is devoid of any basic human decency. He licks your tears and fears away and plants a sloppy kiss against your clammy forehead as he pounds almost endearingly into your tight, obedient cunt. 

And maybe that alternate reality is how you let yourself fall deeper into the abyss of want. You mask moans with whimpers to deny the immense pleasure you feel. Each squelch, squelch, penetrating the night’s stillness in sequence with your bodies. Cruelly tethered to one another until death. 

He growls, signaling his close release. His hand latches onto your hip as his thrusts become erratic. His balls, heavy and begging for release, slap up against you. You let out an open-mouthed gasp, closing your eyes as you hone in on that feeling that sends you deep, so very deep, into oblivion. 

Unlike the first time, you both cum together, your groans a harmony in the night.

You don’t remember what came next. Either from lack of sleep, mental exhaustion, or both, you fall into a deep slumber. You could have also fainted. But trying to figure it out now was simply futile.

Only, you’re not sure how you made it into bed, or how you opened the blinds to let the sun shine brightly through the window. And you’re not quite sure how long you’ve slept either. But you snap back to reality and run to the baby’s room, only to see not one, but two sleeping figures swaying back and forth on the rocking chair.

You can almost hear the crack, crack, cracking as you surrender, the fracture in your mind severe and unmendable.

You walk quietly, reaching for Dabi’s shoulder. His eyes flutter open, and immediately close as your lips meet, tender and sweet.

And you allow yourself hope, just for a bit longer, that maybe, just maybe, it may not be so bad after all. 

[some-cookie-crumbz]

Another Set of Updates

Okay, gonna try to keep this as brief as possible!

My poll regarding which Kidge-a-Palooza AU I should turn into a story proper is still available: [here]. I’m gonna leave it up for another week or so, so please give it a vote if you haven’t already!

Chapter 4 of Here (In Your Arms) is up and available: [here].

Chapter 2 of Paint me in Trust is up and available: [here].

Chapter 2(6) of Time, Space and Everything Between is up and available: [here].

Since the update for Time, Space and Everything Between is up, I wanted to clarify a few things about where it’ll be going from hence forth. That information (spoiler free) can be found below for those that are interested.

Okay, so, confession time! This fic wasn’t supposed to become what it is now. Originally, I planned for this fic to be about six/ seven chapters and go in a somewhat different direction than it has. There was going to be an entire chapter dedicated just to the Kogane and Holt families bonding. The rescue of Shiro was going to go almost the same as it did in the series canon, with Keith being kept on Earth with his father using his camouflage device and entering the Garrison in hopes of snuffing out who the Blue Paladin was. The only big changes to it that I intended to make was Keith and Pidge knowing each other prior, Keith actually being a Galra, and when they head back to the shack, they’re greeted by Papa Kogane. From there, I was planning to end the fic with them going through the wormhole and implying events played out mostly the same as canon. But, then I decided I didn’t really like that idea either, so then I thought I’d go the route of letting Keith grow up with the Holt’s. Like, Ethan moving out there and Krolia leaving Keith on Earth to have a tradional human childhood.

As you can see, I didn’t end up doing any of that. And you may be wondering why.

Because the last season of Voltron left me that disappointed but I will admit I had issues with the show even before that Spit-in-the-Face ending but we’ll get there and I was raised by parents who said “If you don’t know how you’d improve something, you shouldn’t be the one to complain about it.”

Well, fine then. I’m gonna do just that.

ALSO I WANT TO CLARIFY that I am NOT saying I could have written the show better than the show runners themselves! I’ve never been in the position(s) they were in. I do, however, have the benefit of hindsight, which allows me to look at where the show succeeded and failed respectively, and take steps that I think would offer a more cohesive, enjoyable story-telling experience as a whole. I am taking the things that I, personally, took issue with, as well as some of the bigger things I’ve seen the fandom at large take issue with. At the end of the day, though, most of these decisions will be made from my own personal desires/ whims (since, you know, ship-feels and all that jazz). I will, however, be open to criticism from any and all who read my fics, so please feel free to tell me what you think does or doesn’t work as we go along.

I’m gonna break this down into four main categories down below; Things I’m Adding, Things I’m Cutting, Things I’m Adjusting, and Cut Fic Content. All but one of these is pretty self-explanatory, I think, but I promise to explain that little oddity when we get there. I’ll also touch on what and why I chose to approach certain things the way that I did.

Things I’m Adding

Melenor and Garett

Queen Melenor is kind of an anomaly in the series, don’t you think? It was kind of implied throughout most of the series proper that she died while Allura was still pretty young, which would have made a lot more sense for both Allura’s relationship with Alfor, as well as why Alfor was so distant from Zarkon when Daibazaal began tattering at the seams. But then Season 8 happened and threw all that out the window! All of a sudden, Melenor’s death suddenly carries this great significance for Allura, to the point she has a hallucination about her. Plus, it also kinda throws a wrench into scenes from the earlier seasons. Allura specifically says “Zarkon killed my Father and my Mother!” but… If Melenor was killed by Zarkon, where was she during the fall of Altea? Why wasn’t she with her daughter and husband in the final moments? And it makes even less sense when you look at that first scene where Allura and Coran were introduced. There were eight pods there. You mean to tell me Alfor didn’t think it might be a good idea to save an extra body or two to help guide Allura as she steps into the role she will have to take once he’s gone? Or even to help with maintaining/ rebuilding the Castle of Lions?

So, I’ve decided to add Melenor as a way to give some more characterization to not only she herself as a character, but also Alfor. Plus, I decided to make use of Garett (whose name I spell differently for reasons), Coran’s son from the original series, too. I think it’d be more fun to have an extra set of hands on board to help maintain the Castle of Lions and teach the Paladins, but maybe closer to their age range. So, we’ll see how things go with adding him to the roster. :3

Backstory for the Blades

This was something that we should have gotten a little bit of exposition on, considering how inflated their importance got. Like, the Blade became instrumental to the functionality of both Voltron and the Rebels due to their intelligence gathering. I think it’d have been kind of cool to see where it all started and what events in specific triggered it into becoming.

More Focus on Team Relationships

I didn’t really feel like the big victory against Zarkon was earned at the end of Season 2. I also didn’t think the team really earned any of their bigger victories, such as against Lotor and Honerva. They never felt like a real team that meshed because they just kinda stuck the same pairs/ clicks together. This was my biggest issue throughout most of the show and I really want to explore the dynamics we never really got to see. There are a few standout relationships that definitely needed some retooling, but I’ll mention those farther down. 

More Alien Worlds

Sci-fi and Fantasy are my big genres because I. Fudgin. Love seeing the designs for different technology, worlds and races. And while we did get some interesting ones with the series proper - which I’ll be mostly still including - I wish we’d gotten to see more. So, because I have no self-control, I’ll be planning to do that here!

Shiro’s Love Life

Shiro deserved better. I feel like that’s kind of something that most of the fandom can agree on. I don’t say this from a place of hate for Curtis, though, because… Well, what is there to hate? He was a literal background character who did nothing, said maybe two lines of dialogue, and that was it. Considering how much they pushed Shiro being the rep for the LGBT+ crowd, they did literally nothing with his love life. Hell, Adam was only revealed as his fiance because Bex fought tooth and nail for them to say it! If they hadn’t pushed the way they did, it would have all been subtext.

So, Shiro is going to have a romantic side plot in this fic, where we’ll focus on him and the character I’ve picked to be his partner.

Minor Side Romances

Some other little side pairings are gonna get a bit of love, here, too, since Voltron really only did the romance side of things well with, like, two couples. All the main couples are also gonna get plenty of spotlight, but I also think it would be fun to do some smaller side ships every now and then, too.

Things I’m Cutting

Villain Roulette

There was way too much jumping back and forth between who our main villain to focus on was. Bam, it’s Zarkon! No, wait, now it’s Lotor! Just kidding, here comes Zarkon again! Except that it was actually Lotor! Or so you thought; it’s actually Honerva haha great prank amiright? It was exhausting and I think it’d be a lot simpler to just… Stick with one villain who controls the smaller monster-of-the-day bad guys for an extended period of time and, once they’re for reals defeated, then move on to the next. I’ll be taking this approach for the sake of not only having a more focused story, but also my own sanity. I’ve never been good at gambling so trying the same thing as the show would probably turn out even worse for me.

Keith’s Excellent Blade Adventure with His Mommy

This is all unnecessary in this story, so we won’t be doing it at all. Keith’s sorry purple tail is staying with Team Voltron; no buts, no fuss, no coconuts.

Shiro’s Illness and Adam’s Death

Adam’s death is something I could go on about for hours specifically because it seemed unfair and kinda petty. Like, I feel they killed him specifically because they couldn’t kill Shiro, and they wanted to amp up the Tragic Backstory for our prior leader. So, instead, that’s getting the boot, as well as Shiro’s illness, since it’s also unneeded for plot convenience. Plus, it could have been nice to have a character that was willing to call Shiro out on the Atlus. Shiro always got treated like some kind of flawless entity, and I think it’d been nice to have someone call that Nice Guy Schtick out.

Allura and the Entity Plotline

This whole thing made no sense, got no proper development because of how late into the game they introduced it, and ended up being nothing more than a tool for them to kill Allura off. So, that can GTFO of my house post haste.

The Ending as a Whole

Some parts of the ending worked, but most of it just sucked. When the ending is so bad that it makes me feel obligated to stan characters I was ambivalent/ outright disliked? Yeah, gonna need to walk that back a bit.

Most of Seasons 3-6

The pacing in these seasons really was terrible. We derailed working on the team dynamic, building up the Coalition and Rebel forces, and developing the Paladins’ characters to instead focus on all that shit with Lotor. That… Was infuriating. Especially considering it was all basically a waste.

Additionally, we had Keith sidelined and his arc - which was clearly going to be center around him learning how to be a leader - completely pushed aside and then treated as if it did happened when he showed up late with Starbucks at the end of Season 6. That felt really unbelievable to me.

Time Skips

There were way too many time skips, for serious. Especially when those time skips didn’t include any kind of change in development/ character for the team. There’ll be smaller time skips, but nothing as egregious as what we got in seasons 6 and 7.

Things I’m Adjusting                                                              

Lion Swap

This’ll still be happening, but the circumstances that trigger it will be different. I may also shift around who gets to take which Lion when we get to that point. I haven’t decided just yet, but I’ll have it figured out before we reach that point. Most of this fic is already planned out and, honestly, the Lion Swap will be finalized once I figure out what I’m doing with a few of the other characters.

Shiro and Keith’s Relationship

This, right here? This was one of my biggest issues with Voltron. Keith was completely codependent on Shiro, while Shiro clearly cared about Keith’s well-being but it always felt like he’d have been just fine if something similar to what happened to him happened to Keith. It’s just… Really gross to me. It doesn’t help that I also find the whole “Dying for Your Lover” Trope – which I’ve seen a lot of people praise The Black Paladins for implying - to be incredibly disgusting and unhealthy. Also Keith’s flagrant hypocrisy never getting called out bothers me a lot since I actually like when a character behaves in a hypocritical manner, since it feels organic, but it has to be called out because hypocrisy can lead to double-standards and create harmful environments and I need to stop for now

So, Keith and Shiro are still going to be close, but they aren’t going to be that close.

Keith and Allura’s Relationship

Oh, look! Another potentially interesting aspect of the show that they kinda dropped the ball on! I really hated Allura’s heel-turn on Keith when it’s revealed that he’s Galra in S2 because a) It’s not like Keith himself knew this and was actively hiding it, and b) It felt out of character for the way Allura had been presented thus far. Her lashing out at Zarkon when she was captured made sense since he directly killed her father, her people and her planet. And I could understand being wary of the Blades – to the extent that she was in the first half – but after Keith’s heritage is revealed, she’s completely cold to him and only seems to decide he’s a good guy when he’s willing to take on a potential suicide mission! They either needed to drag the animosity out and show it effecting Allura’s ability to work with the team as a whole and also show the team sticking up for Keith because the fact that Hunk was the only one that said anything is kinda messed up like where tf was Shiro if he and Keith are oh so close? or they needed to tone Allura’s attitude towards him back a bit more, have her approach him in a manner similar to how she addressed the Blade members; acknowledging he is there and contributing, but not praising or thanking him outright.

And since Keith presents and knows he’s part Galra from the start in this fic? Well, we’ll actually get to play around with that dynamic a little more. And while I’m on the subject of our favorite Altean princess…

Allura’s Character Inconsistencies

Allura’s character jumped around a lot in some of the earlier seasons and I’d be willing to wager that this is because the writers never settled on an age for her. And I don’t mean during the big changes like her becoming a Paladin or Lotor’s betrayal, since it’d make sense she be shaken by situations that drastic. One minute, she’s this composed, confident and well-spoken young leader doing the best she can. The next, she’s a more temperamental sort who has low self-esteem/ confidence in her own abilities to even successfully contribute to a team. Now, I think I kniw what they were trying to do; they were trying to show that the more impulsive side of her is more genuine while the composed side is her trying to be the leader she is expected to be. I get it. They fixed this and improved on it later down the line, but they could have done better by maybe addressing it and using it as a chance to develop her relationship with another member or two of Team Voltron.

Season 2’s Ending

The defeat of Zarkon happened way too soon. Especially since then, because they wanted to play around with Lotor’s intentions, they had to bring him back as a cyborg-zombie fueled by quintessence. Zarkon should have only been defeated once and then we should have been allowed to move on to the next main villain. As such, I’m moving Zarkon’s defeat further down the line and will be modifying some of the consequences there in.

P Much Everything About Lotor’s Acr/ Motives

Lotor… Man, Lotor was confusing and a lot of wasted potential. They painted him as if they wanted him to be a morally grey villain, where he does terrible things for what he considers the betterment of others, but then, once it’s revealed that he was keeping secrets, he just… Goes full ham. He becomes Evil McAwful incarnate and it felt unrealistic. There were about 20 different directions they could have taken Lotor – before and after the reveal – and I just didn’t care for the approach they took. So, I’ll be doing things a little different and seeing how that goes.

What I’m Keeping from Seasons 3-6

Very, very little things are going to be kept from each of the aforementioned seasons and implemented in the fic. I’m not planning to keep too many of the big plot moments because they all bled into the issues I had with the story as it stood on its own. I will, however, take some of the small things from those three seasons and include them here. This also applies to certain elements from the other seasons as well, but we’ll get there when we get there.

Adopting Kosmo

Kosmo will be in this fic, come Hell or high water. He is the Best Boi and deserves to be here.

Cut Fic Content

Okay, so here’s the weird one in this line up! As the title implies, there’s some content that I have cut from the fic, even this early on. I actually have some of the Kogane-Holt bonding scenes still drafted up somewhere in my files. I removed them because I was worried that they’d feel too much like filler. There’s also some scenes I started to work out from when I planned to have Keith grow up with Pidge and Matt; specifically including a scene where Krolia and Ethan talk about the idea and decide to commit.

Some of these ideas won’t work in the fic as it stands now, though. I also, however, like the idea of putting it out for everyone to read. So, I’m debating on making a separate one-shot collection of things that could have happened, or just adding them as the occasional buffer between the arcs of the story. I’ll make a poll when I get closer to the point of deciding how to proceed, so keep an eye out for that. :3

That’s all for now! I hope you all enjoy the updates and I’ll hopefully be updating again sooner than this time!

[aparticularbandit]

Current State of Bandit Fic:

This is long, so I apologize to everyone on mobile if that read more does not work and you have to scroll through a really long thing you don’t want to read.  Sorry!

Completed JTV Fics (by which I mean completed drafts not completed and posted):

Carla

The rough draft is completely finished.

There are fifteen chapters total.

Some of these chapters are really rough and need a lot of editing.

Okay maybe not a lot but definitely some editin.

I plan to post a chapter every other week hopefully on Mondays.

But honestly idk if I’ll keep track of which Mondays I’ve posted a chapter and which I haven’t unless I have something to alternate them with.

Luisa and the Fox

The second draft is completely finished.

It’s off with my betas.

I’ve mostly let it lie fallow for the past month-ish (or maybe only a couple of weeks idk how long it’s been friends), which means I should be able to come at it with new eyes, too.

There are five chapters total.

However, I do currently plan to have a second connected fic that’s half a direct follow-up and half I just want Luisa and the Fox fluff.

Stuff that didn’t really fit into the fic proper (like the freckles scene).

I plan to post a chapter every other week on also hopefully on Mondays.

The plan is to alternate these with Carla chapter updates, but right now I’m waiting on input from at least one of my betas before posting another chapter.

This may change in the future because I’ve been getting antsy for...a lot of reasons.

In-Progress Posted JTV Fics (by which I mean I don’t have a completed draft):

If You Lived Here, You’d Be Home Now

Now that Carla’s rough draft is finished, polls have said to focus on this one.

These chapters are harder, so hoping to do one a month.

But this really depends on how well the chapter is going - y’all probably noticed a longer wait between chapters 7 and 8 because group therapy was a barrier.

Unlike Carla and Luisa and the Fox, this fic doesn’t really have a chapter-by-chapter plan (and even Carla didn’t until those last chapters...mostly).

So I kind of know what I want to happen through the course of the fic and the order of things but sometimes more set-up is required than just jumping around (or maybe it’s not but I feel like it is).

I have no idea how many chapters are left.

At least seventeen, if my current projections are correct, and that’s dealing with stuff that I feel like needs to be in separate chapters (although I may change my mind on that later), not even necessarily including stuff that I want to sprinkle in among other things (Rose meeting with her therapist, scattered Susanna stuff, etc.), which means it might be longer, it might not be.

And like - even with those seventeen - I feel like some of them definitely warrant some cool-down time between or something like that, so guesstimates would project more than that.

Jane: The Real Story

This was second on the polls as far as things y’all wanted me to focus on.

I don’t plan to schedule updates on this one.  They may just happen when they happen.

These tend to be less intensive than the IYLHYBHN chapters, and they may fill in the every other week on Mondays slot when Carla is posted, but don’t hold me to that because I would prefer these to be unscheduled.

I also have no idea how many chapters are left.

I do plan on at least getting into s2 and s3 and potentially dealing with some of the stuff happening in s5 - like the Michael has amnesia! bit because that was part of the original post - but this is subject to change.

Mainly I have plans for that Michael bit and then dealing with Susanna and why Luisa and Rose are gone for a while.

And if this turns into Jane quit telling Mateo lies! then we...need an older Mateo.

I don’t know where/when I plan to end this.

This one is super flexible and I intend to leave it being flexible because I like having it that way.

The Adventures of Rose, the Baker’s Daughter

I like writing fairy tales don’t judge me.

This may jump into the every other week on Mondays slot when Luisa and the Fox is posted, but I may just start immediately into the other Luisa and the Fox fic that I mentioned instead.  Not sure on that yet.

I don’t know how many chapters are left.

There are at least seven, but just as with IYLHYBHN, that’s stuff I feel should be segmented into chapters and does not include other stuff that might happen between those chapters (like, for instance, I have a couple of general plot point chapters for later but don’t know all of the interconnected stuff).  In this case, I’d expect more than seven chapters.  If I finish it.  Y’all don’t seem too keen on this one.

There’s a lot of uncertains on this one, too, but I think that’s okay because y’all don’t seem too excited for it.

In-Progress Unposted JTV Fics (by which I mean I don’t have a completed draft):

Everything’s Coming Up Rose’s

90s rom-com au that no one really asked for but I’m over 17k deep into writing so you’ll probably get it anyway.

I mean.  Technically it was fourth on stuff y’all wanted me to focus on, actually ahead of The Adventures of Rose, sooooooooo.  Y’all want it but when it comes down to only getting one option on things, you don’t.

And you certainly don’t want it more than any of the other proposed aus.

Looking at maybe twelve? chapters.

Already wrote the first two and started the third, as well as having a chunk of chapter...7?? written and a bit that maybe shows up in chapter...8?? and another bit that might show up...in one of the earlier chapters maybe but I’m not sure where to put it yet.

The first two chapters are super rough but I like them, and I like this story.  A lot.  Which is why it kind of hangs out and still shows up on polls.

AND LIKE.  I ACTUALLY KNOW THE WHOLE PLOT.  DO YOU KNOW HOW RARE THAT IS.

I don’t know when I’ll start posting this one, and since y’all’ve told me y’all want me to focus on other fics in-progress and other aus, this should be lower on my totem pole but.  I like it.  So it’s not.

Luisa and the Fox: Shenanigans

Continuation of Luisa and the Fox.

No set number of chapters.

This is here for me to have more with these characters because I like them and there was more I wanted to write with them (originally just the freckles scene, but there’s starting to be some other stuff that I kind of have hanging around in my head that I might do) that didn’t really fit into the original story.

Don’t plan on posting these until after Luisa and the Fox is posted for obvious reasons, and this may fall into the every other Mondays slot once Luisa and the Fox is done.  I haven’t decided yet.

Brainstorming JTV Fics (by which I mean they’re primarily in the brainstorming stage but they may have a little bit written for them):

Harry Potter AU

The most requested AU on the poll.

Currently projected to have seven multi-chapter books.

Currently planned to be set concurrent with the original series.

Which means it may be more a crossover than an AU.  Ish.

I’ve been rereading the original series so as to get a better idea of how things fit together (and the anti-Slytherin stuff and commentary is so big and I don’t think it stops because even if you bring up Snape it’s in context of we sorted him too soon and he should’ve been in Gryffindor so like.  THOUGHTS).

This looks like it will be really long if I keep with this idea and write the whole thing.

Please don’t expect this to be finished quickly.

Please expect that I will likely take breaks to write other things.

Focus is on Clara as the viewpoint character.

I’ve made changes to birth years so that Clara and Luisa are born in the same year.

This does put Luisa a year higher in school than Clara, but since they’re in different houses anyway, this doesn’t really present a problem.

I might be overthinking this.

I’ve started outlining the first book.

I paused at chapter twelve because still figuring out the overarching series plot so the first book plot should tie into that.

I do have a general idea of character arcs for Clara/Rose and Luisa over the series and how that plays into what is discovered by the original trio over the series.

I also have a good idea of what happens in the final battle.  It’s the externals that’s causing me more problems than the character-character and internals.

I’ve started the first chapter of the first book, but it’s really rough and probably will have a lot of changes.

Hallmark Holiday Special

The second most requested AU on the poll.

Currently I have a general idea of which version I want to go with.

Those of you who were around in November/December know that there were two variations I was playing with.  A lot of aspects of those got retooled and put into Everything’s Coming Up Rose’s - and I mean a lot of aspects of both because I took the Rose from one and the Luisa from the other and meshed those together.  However, this means I can take the one that plays the Hallmark tropes straight and not worry about the complications I’d originally planned for that because they come up somewhere else, which. lets me play it more straight.

Straight, hah.

Maybe five chapters?

Off the top of my head thinking about where the chapters would break?

Maybe?

Sounds about right?

Because they’re, like, 1.5hr shows with commercial breaks every fifteen minutes, but each commercial break is like five minutes or more, so there’s like.  five segments, right?  Something like that?  My math on this is probably wrong but.  five segments?  Maybe?

I could probably jump back into writing this (I did start this somewhere in November/December) but I think I want to retool the beginning for other stuff that I think might mesh better than what I initially did.  And it needed to be edited and I should rewrite the beginning anyway, so.

This is just backburner as far as writing because do you see all of the other stuff?

Also there’s -- just because I know what needs to happen in each chapter doesn’t mean I actually have concrete plot for each chapter and I kind of want to know the complication before I jump into writing so I can make sure to get that set up properly soooooooooo we’ll see.

The hope is that I have this set and ready to post in July.

Primarily because the idea of Christmas in July makes me happy.

--and you know what.  There are five Mondays in July.  I could just have this be what I update weekly in July if there are actually five chapters.

Tentative schedule maybe????

University AU

Tied for third most requested AU with canon-compliant soulmate AU, which is below.

Since the poll for prof/prof or student/student is deadlocked at a tie, I plan to go with prof/prof.

To counterbalance the HP AU, which is a really long extended student/student AU.  With a whole bunch of other stuff.

I may do a student/student university AU later, but probably not.

My most recent ideas for the student/student university AU combines with the non-canon-compliant soulmate AU and hit some of the same points that IYLHYBHN does but in a different way with different variations.  Ish.  So because I still have general ideas for that, maybe, maybe not.  Unsure.

This is currently being brainstormed.

I have a general idea for how to start this off.

So, like, the first two chapters, maybe?  Or, like, a prologue and the first chapter?

I know how I want Rose and Luisa to meet, which would be the second chapter or...not the prologue.

I have a general idea as far as Luisa’s character.

I have less on Rose as far as concrete aspects, but I may get there.

I might jump into this one before the Hallmark Holiday Special just because it’s lingering in that place where you feel like you could be starting off on writing something and it’s there sort of thing?

Idk, it feels like less fluff than the HHS, which still needs some plot straightened out before I feel completely comfortable jumping back into it.

Canon-Compliant Soulmate AU

Tied for third most requested AU with university AU (see above).

I’m not focusing on this right now.

I know people like the one-shot and want a continuation of that, which is why this was on the poll.

I like the one-shot as a one-shot.  I think it is complete as a one-shot.  I don’t think expanding on that one will actually make it any better.

Which is why, if I revisited the soulmate timer idea, I’d planned on doing it differently and ended up combining it with the university student/student AU idea.

I do not plan on continuing the one-shot but instead want to deal with other soulmate AU tropes if I do another soulmate AU.

Given that I’d rather play with other soulmate AU tropes, I want to look through general ideas.  Once one of those stands out to me as something that could mesh better in the long form for something canon-compliant, I can start better brainstorming.

So I guess this is less in the brainstorming stage and more in the idea collecting stage.

I hang out in the RPC, so I should be able to find one of those soulmate tropes posts at some point.  And if not, you have all these other things above to look forward to that are getting more focus than this is.

This, of course, doesn’t include any one-shot ideas or the other aus I listed on that poll (I still really want to do the SG/Tick/JTV crossover because I’ve got ideas for that and how that would work), nor does it include any non-JTV fics I may or may not be writing/editing/etc.

So, basically, lots of content if I can get my butt sat down to write it.  We’ll see how it goes because, honestly, looking at all of this is intimidating, and like, I’m excited for...most of these projects but.  It’s a lot.  It’s a lot.

But I just wanted to update y’all on current projections for these.

[oneofthosecrazycatladies]

So I’ve sorta been away (in a manner of speaking) for a while, so I feel compelled to re-introduce myself.

This blog used to be so awesome and then a while back I realized that I was getting kinda bored with this blog so I deleted all my old memes and I was gonna re-vamp the blog. And then the Facebook page where I got all my memes from shut down and I was like “well shit, what am I gonna do now”. After that I kinda checked out mentally on this blog (and I was also really focused on my confessions blog).

Now that I’ve sorta got myself all sorted out (at least, in regards to my blogging), I want to really focus on re-vamping this blog for real. So I’m gonna start posting original stuff again but in a slightly different way. I’m not really gonna be posting memes anymore, it’s basically just gonna be the theme days (if you’re new to this blog and you don’t know what those are, I’ll explain in a minute).

But first things first:

All you need to know about me in regards to this blog is that I’m a giant nerd and I love fandoms. I created this blog about 4 years ago because I wanted a place where I could just geek out about all this stuff that I loved. And then the blog started to get really popular and I realized that I had an opportunity to turn this blog into a community. That’s why, from now on, I’m gonna focus less on the “meme page” setup and more on the “community” aspect.

If you want to know more about me personally, you can follow my personal blog @oneofthosecrazygirls97 which doesn’t have a theme like this blog, it’s just random bullshit that I like (it’s mostly pictures of cats). You can also ask me any personal questions you want on this blog.

You can also follow my confessions blog @fandomlife-confessions which I started like 2 years ago I think where people can submit any fandom-related confessions they might have (its 100% anonymous). This blog has become much more successful than I ever anticipated and it’s probably the blog I’m most proud of.

I have a fan fiction blog @oneofthosecrazygirls-fics which is connected to my AO3 account of the same name. This is where I post all my own original fan fiction. I haven’t really been writing much lately but I’m trying to get back into it so hopefully I’ll be posting again soon.

I also have a side blog that’s 100% about Anne Boleyn, but I don’t know how many of you would actually be interested in that. So moving on...

And lastly, the blog that I just created a couple days ago @incorrect-arrowverse-quotes I started this blog because I love incorrect quote blogs and I always wanted to start one of my own, but there are like a million for every fandom and I wanted to do one for a fandom that doesn’t really have one (I feel like every fandom should have at least one incorrect quotes blog) and I noticed that there isn’t really one for the Arrowverse (there are some for the individual Arrowverse shows, but not the verse as a whole). Also, side note: if you love the Arrowverse too and you also watch a lot of other TV shows, I’m looking for mods to help me with that blog so private message me if you’re interested.

Okay now that I’m done shamelessly plugging my other blogs, let’s talk about this blog. So I mentioned above that I’m going to be focusing more on the community aspect of this blog which starts with the theme days (and a couple new features I’m really excited about). So, if you’re new (or you just need a refresher) let me explain the theme days.

Spam Sunday - On Sundays I choose one character or ship and I exclusively post about them. Now, in the past, I only did the spam for a few hours, but now that I’m not posting memes anymore, I’ve decided that Spam Sunday is gonna last all day. This day operates entirely on requests so you can send me a request any time for a character or a ship that you’d like to fill your dash for a day. (I always announce the spam before it starts so if it’s a character or ship you don’t like then you can just block the tag or unfollow me for the day until it’s over).

Man Crush Monday - This is also what I call a “request day” meaning I decide who gets featured on this day based on your requests. This day is for ACTORS (not characters). You can request any actor for this day. In the past, I used to just put ten pictures into one post, but once again, now that I’m not really posting memes anymore, I’m gonna spread the pictures out over the course of the whole day. (I should warn you though, since this day depends on me finding pictures of a certain actor, if I don’t really know what that actor looks like, I most likely won’t fill your request). Monday is also the day that I ask for submissions for Would You Rather Tuesday

Which brings us to...

Would You Rather Tuesday - This used to be Would You Rather Wednesday but then I started Woman Crush Wednesday and I couldn’t have two theme days on one day. Anyway, so this is a “submissions only” day. You can send me WYR submissions any day of the week, but I only specifically ask for them on Monday. Would You Rather Tuesday is pretty much exactly what it sounds like: you submit your fandom-related would you rathers and I post them.

Woman Crush Wednesday - This day is just the female equivalent to Man Crush Monday.

Throwback Thursday - Now this day is all me. I won’t really bother explaining it because it’s exactly what you think it is. This is also the day I’ll as for Fan Work Friday submissions.

Fan Work Friday - This day is for all the artists! This is the day you can submit all your fan art, fan fiction, fan videos, fan whatever.

Ship War Saturday - You know how sometimes websites like Buzzfeed will have those polls where you vote for different ships in like a tournament until one wins? That’s what this day is. (I just call it “ship war Saturday” because I like the alliteration). Every Saturday, I’ll choose one fandom and then you’ll vote on the ships you like best in that fandom until one is declared the winner.

I also have a couple new community-oriented features that I’ll be introducing that I’ll talk more about later.

Okay so now that all the housekeeping is out of the way, the only thing left to say is that my inbox is always open so you can start requesting and submitting any time. I’ll be starting the theme days back up on Sunday (because I hate starting things in the middle).

[pinksausageduo]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 1K+

IM SCREAMING WTF YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING genuinely can’t believe i have more than 1000 of you actually liking my blog to the point of following me??!!! I have really bad updates LIKE REALLY BAD like for 2 and half months i’ve been on tumblr i’ve probably only been posting for 1 month and a bit. AND THE FACT YOU STILL ALL LIKE MY WRITINGS AND FOLLOW ME IS CRAZY!! i seriously mean it when i absolutely adore each and everyone of you following my blog like i love you guys so so much. and please don’t be afraid to ever talk to me whether it’s on anon or message whether it’s about how annoying your life is, ranting, my writing, advice, questions, literally anything. i just love you guys sooooo much like wow i never even expected more than 100 followers like i’m mind blown.

so since it is a milestone and usually most blogs do something, i did prepare a present for my followers and another one for my mutuals because i love you all.

FOR MY FOLLOWERS: A NEW SERIES!!!!!

i know i have still my enemies to lovers series that i need to complete and i will do that but there will be a new series and YOU GUYS GET TO CHOOSE which one I write first either;

Heirs 

located in an expensive private school, wanna one is known as the Heirs. they’re all extremely rich, good looking, talented and basically the kings of the school. each guy will have a girl that catches their eye, those girls will be you! from the quick witted and sassy scholarship student to the extremely rich ice princess who no one wants to even approach to the shy sweet nobody, one member will fall for you. choose to find out!

so will you choose the heirs??

Bodyguards

wanna one is a team of bodyguards assigned to people who need protection. over the years each and every one of them finds themselves falling for someone on the job. but falling in love isn’t part of the job or is it? they’ll fall for you! from the president’s daughter to another intelligence agency’s spy to even a princess, one member will fall for you. choose to find out!

so will you choose the bodyguards??

HOW TO CHOOSE

message me by kkt or tumblr

comment below

reblog with which one

choose in poll : https://goo.gl/forms/G4GrlZEfOPL30jnP2

CHOOSING WILL CLOSE IN AROUND 2 WEEKS ON 11/11/17 

please vote!!! i’ll love you all forever if you do!!!! 

FOR MY MUTUALS/PEOPLE I ADMIRE & FOLLOW: FOLLOW FOREVER/RECS/DESCRIPTION

WANT TO GIVE OUT A HUGE SHOUTOUT TO MY MUTUALS AS WELL AND IT’LL BE KINDA A FOLLOW FOREVER/RECS (it’ll be long asf (like REALLY long) so i’ll put it under keep reading) this will be in all three person sorry :( 

EVERYONG: i love y'all sm we all so so crazy and we occasionally talk about writing but eh it’s really just a mess but making our gc was one of the best decisions i made on tumblr AND IM SO SORRY if i don’t have you down below but i’m giving you all my love and appreciation rn here!!! BUT JUST LOVE YOU ALL!!

FIRST OF ALL SHOUTOUT TO DIAMOND @woojiniee FOR ENCOURAGING ME TO START THIS BLOG I WOULDN’T BE HERE WITHOUT YOU. lol it’s weird how my blog started from helping you w your english homework on harry potter lmao. i genuinely love you so so much and i admire you, your works and your blog and just thank you for everything!

ALSO A HUGE SHOUTOUT TO JAS @perkwoojin!!!! MY ABSOLUTE LOVE AND MY BEST FRIEND!! jas you’ve been here for me whether it’s irl problems or tumblr problems and you’ve never judged me for anything i’ve done. you are so so so special to me and i just love you soooo much i genuinely can’t imagine not meeting you on tumblr. we hit it off right from the start and we’ve only gotten closer. while the time difference may be annoying we still talk often and just thank you so much for always being there for me, love you loads!!!

MY SENPAIS (the people who inspired me to write and start this blog, i would literally check your blog for updates everyday before starting this blog) :

@imagineproduce101 genuinely think carina is the queen of writing in the pd101/wanna one fandom, she’s blessed us with so many fics on such a regular basis i’ve never talked to you personally and you probs have no idea who i am but just want to say thank you so much for inspiring me to write, your fics always made me feel so soft and fluffy i wanted to make other people feel that way so thank you!!! 

fic recs: rivals (pleaseee do pt 2), what are you waiting for, let me love you, banana milk love, red bull, new beginnings, all of mafia aus, all of hp aus, all of vampire aus 

@woojiniee i’ve already mentioned diamond^ but gonna mention her again cause she is one of my senpais LITERALLY SOOOO GOOD WRITING LIKE WTH PLEASE LET ME LIVE she’s less busy now so IM WAITING FOR UPDATES GIRLL but seriously check out all of her fics will not be disappointed

fic recs: alpaca boy saves the day, crushing on you, jaehwan soulmate au, dating a park at a park

@wanna-request-one​ such great paragraph writings mine will never live up to theirs writing is so amazing just so great if you want detailed long writing the best blog to go to all of them are AMAZING WRITERS congrats on 1.8K!!

fic recs: seongwoo soulmate, seongwoo brother’s best friend, jaehwan college, I HATE YOU IM YOUNGMIN (literally so in love w this fic)

@wanna-one-scenarios amazing writer!!! so so so niceeee she’s starting college rn so v busy i miss youuu we never get to chat but its okayyy BUT LIKE SHIT WRITING IS SOOOO ON POINT LIKE WTH just go through her whole master list won’t regret it

fic recs: DANIEL PRINCE AU!!! (like if y’all haven’t read this missing out on sm), jongyun father au, sewoon enemies to lovers au

@wannaonestars love reading her writing such great bullet points and really good ideas ALSO SO JEALOUS that like short bullet points BUT CAN MAKE ME FEEL SO FLUFF like that is a skill ppl 

fic recs: all of boyfriend series (like so fluff) ESPECIALLY SEONGWOO’S, jihoon soulmate, minhyun office au

@jsioos (was heochannies) MEIKE IS SO PRETTY AND NICE AND AN AMAZING WRITER LIKE WHAT HOW CAN YOU BE SO BLESSED has such a diverse range of works from scenarios to mtls to reactions so genuinely impressed with her blog like goals

fic recs: all of boyfriend series FOR EVERY SINGLE GROUP like she’s amazing at those, and movie night with seongwoo

@ukulelewrites ALSO LONG ASS FICS AMAZING BLOG seriously such amazing writing love so many fics of hers DESERVES MORE ATTENTION AND FOLLOWERS and super sweet as well 

fic recs: cherry picker’s club, a fanta-sea, homerun and ephiany (it’s nct ten BUT SUCH AN AMAZING FIC NEED TO PUT IT ON HERE)

@kanggdaniell STEPH IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND SO NICE AND RLY BUSY AS WELL but amazing writer just love her writing so much she isn’t as active as before but still should definitely check out master list cause so many amazing scenarios

fic recs: TSUNDERE (FUCK FUCK READ IT RN BEST SERIES FOR ME ON TUMBLR WOOJIN STANS COLLECT YOUR BOI), always in my heart, all of breakup scenarios, all of bad boy scenarios

ANOTHER SPECIAL SHOUTOUT TO IRIS AKA @alliwannado-w1 LITERALLY RELATES W ALL MY WRITING PROBLEMS ON A PERSONAL LEVEL IS THE ABSOLUTE SWEETEST CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HER WORKS, BLOG AND FOLLOWERS I LOVE HER WRITING AND ADMIRE HOW DEDICATED SHE IS TO POST SO REGULARLY just i rly should stop writing in caps but like just genuinely she is the princess of writing in the pd101/wanna one fandom and she’s just so so amazing and all her writings are always so much fun to read like i love her so much but like no offence iris but you’re fucking crazy in the best way possible like to have so many wips like GIRL YOU NEED A BREAK 

fic recs: FUCKBOY SERIES (iris got all her fame from here lol jk), daniel werewolf au, jihoon soulmate au, jihoon vampire au, woojin youtuber au, woojin policeman au, jinyoung barista au, sewoon soulmate au, youngmin youtuber au gonna stop there cause i’ll be listing her whole master list soon ;)

AMAZING WRITERS (just to give heads up have liked these recommended fics on another private account so if you like look at the likes and i’m not there that’s the reason):

@daehwifi​​ GENUINELY LOVE THESE TWO SO SO MUCH AND THEY’RE BOTH RIDICULOUSLY TALENTED and hella sweet like cutest married couple ik TIFFY thank youuu for always making me smile and MAE for being the sweetest angel but YOUR WRITING IS ALSO HELLA GOOD like great bullet point fics and regular updates 

fic recs: bandaid guanlin scenario, movies ongniel scenario, skype calls jinyoung scenario 

@deepdickdaniel​​ ARIANE EVERYONG GC MOTHER (aurora’s dad now) and the ultimate HOE for daniel but got guys chasing after her constantly SMH and all our gc is beautiful because of your genes ANYWAYS you’re also a good ass writer and if anyone wants bomb ass daniel fics FOLLOW ARIANES BLOG YALL

fic recs: doormat, all her soulmate aus especially taste, hiking w daniel

@dong-hyucks​ oKAY so jade has only like one fic on wanna one BUT SHE’S SUPER TALENTED AND SHE DOES SO MANY GROUPS like mutlifandom ASF AND I LOVE HER ALOT 

fic recs: daniel soulmate au, na jaemin spy au, i’m with you taeyong

@donghyxns​​​ IF YALL WANT MXM SCENARIOS/CONTENT THIS SHIT IS RIGHT HERE also has a lot of wanna one scenarios but maddie is the biggest donghyun fan ik and super sweet even though we haven’t talked much!

fic recs: royalty au donghyun, actually all the royalty aus,  TIC TOK WOOJIN SOULMATE AU, youngmin as your boyfriend

@ennergetics​​ RAE my favourite drunk aunt ever like super funny and nice and talking about bts is always great with you RAE YOU ALSO LIKE AN AMAZING WRITER and make me feel all sorts of stuff when i read your works

edit: fuck me im so sorry rae lmao idk if it was the fact i wrote this at 3am or I'm terrible speller originally or it was auto correct IDEK BUT ILYSM DONT HATE MEEEEE

fic recs: bad first dates, prince aus, woojin college/barista au

@fromwannaone​​ ANNIE A COMPLETE UTTER SWEETHEART WITH WRITING SKILLS which put me to shame and fic ideas are always sooo good too just fuck meeeee i love youuu and your writing 

fic recs: ALL HER SCHOOL SERIES which is like all members basically sooo, on rainy days, sweet like candy

@hiyawoojin​​ RISSAAAA MY BABY MY PRECIOUSSSS I WANT TO PROTECT YOU AND HUG YOU AND LOVE YOU FOREVER but genuinely rissa is the sweetest person ik on tumblr and her sweetness is as equal to her writing BUT SINCE SHE’S A NEWBIE EVERYONE GIVE HER LOVE

fic recs: ALL OF THEM since there’s about 4 but i like the woojin and the minhyun in particular hehehe

@hwinkinghwi​​ XUAN WE BONDED INSTANTLY YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME SMILE AND LAUGH and we talk about the weirdest things but it’s still heaps of fun and xuan has short sweet bullet point fics which will warm your heart

fic series: both baejin fics: chicken first cuddles later, florist jinyoung, baker woojin, ___ as your boyfriend (all of them)

@jeonjeonggukks​​ I LOVE ALEX SM SERIOUSLY SO SO SO FUNNY LIKE WTH and sooooo easy to slander BUT SHE IS MY MOTHER (well one of them) AND I LOVE HER SO SO MUCH AND SHE’S ALSO AN AMAZING ASS WRITER so y’all should read her writings

fic recs: shipped jonghyun scenario, our necklaces sungwoon soulmate au, why her why him woojin

@jihoonslattee​​ AHHH WE JUST STARTED TALKING CHI BUT I ALREADY LOVE YOU AND JUST WOW YOUR WRITING IS INCREDIBLE WISH I COULD BE YOU AND HAS SOOOO MANY FICS DONE LIKE IM SO IMPRESSED wow i did that in all caps but like JIHOON STANS WHO WANT JIHOON FICS like chi’s blog like 100% recommend also does reactions SO CHECK HER OUT 

fic recs: jihoon prince au (this was sooo good), daniel CEO both parts, seongwoo boyfriend au, jihoon soulmate au

@mongniel​​ AURORA OUR SALTY ASS MOTHER/FATHER who leaves us regularly and is a daniel seongwoo stan (she says so at least) BUT LIKE GOTTA APPRECIATE HER ABILITY TO MAKE ME FEEL SO MUCH SHIT WITH HER ANGST also if y'all love angst daniel fics AURORA’S BLOG IS THE ONE FOR YOU

fic recs: BROKEN RECORD (heart BREAKING), no chance no way, in his dreams, no answer

@peachiejihoonie​​ SAYS IN DESCRIPTION SHE’S BAD AT WRITING BUT THAT’S RIDICULOUS her writing is sooooo good like not too many fics up BUT ALL OF THEM ARE AMAZING like what??

fic recs: demigod series, daniel fuckboy 

@perkwoojin​​ IVE ALREADY MENTIONED JAS CAUSE SHES MY ONE ETERNAL LOVE but genuinely wtf so talented I AM SHOOK she does EVERYTHING like gifs, reactions, scenarios AND SHE HAS TWO OTHER BLOGS for the boyz and stray kids fans CHECK THOSE BLOGS OUT TOO

fic recs: basically everything but in particular wanna one as prom dates, wanna one reacting to you how to solve a rubix cube, and all her series which include: boyfriend, fallen angel, AND check out woojin badboy pt 1 & 2 and now ive literally listed her whole master list whoopss

@playfuldisaster​​ CHRISTINE IS SUCH A SWEETHEART LIKE WOW genuinely like an angel AND I LOVE TALKING TO HER but she also has so many works up! WHICH NEED MORE ATTENTION cause they’re so good

fic recs: and i’m here seongwoo, attention baejin, my boy lollipop baejin, sorry kang daniel

@producedwannaone​​ SO UNDERRATED LIKE WHAT HOW EVERYONE WAKE UP also honey I NEED A MASTERLIST like need to stalk your blog easily yooo but seriously such a great writer and a sweetheart x 

fic recs: wanna one seeing their donsaeng in their t shirt, naps with guanlin

@starrywinters​​ SHEENA YOU HAVE SHARED MY PAIN OF HAVING SEONGWOO AS A BIAS WRECKER but like other than that you mean so so much to me you are positively brilliant in every single way AND DON’T TELL YOURSELF OTHERWISE seriously AND IT INCLUDES YOUR WRITING SKILLS 

fic recs: cute bandaids, minhyun college au, 7 minutes in heaven jihoon, hugs woojin, guanlin soulmate/vampire au

@wannabeone​​ just dammnnnn girl your writing is SO GOOD LIKE WHAT?? always makes me feel all nice inside just love reading your works fic recs: all of best friend lovers (like you will not be disappointed), kissing cuddling hugging wanna one

@wannamoon​​ JUJU IK YOU’RE ON HIATUS AND YOU HAVEN’T REPLIED TO MY MESSAGES CRI but i miss your baejin fangirl squealing and your posts which will be filled with sadness cause it’s you lmao BUT COME BACK SOON I MISS YOU AND I LOVE YOU but juju has such a good mix of fluff and angst fics and super unique and heart warming ideas

fic recs: crumble both parts guanlin, ALL HER LIFE AUS LIKE FUCK SUCH GOOD FLUFF, halcyon seongwoo, jihoon soulmate au

@wannaonescenarios​ SERIOUSLY SUCH GREAT SHORT FLUFF WRITINGS LIKE WHAT HOW I WISH and has a long ass masterlist WHICH IS AMAZING TO GO THROUGH just like go right now to her blog amazing writings IS AVAILABLE

fic recs: SOULMATE AU SERIES, dating series, college series (even tho it’s only youngmin), daniel cat cafe owner 

@wannasoftimagine​​ OMG SUCH AMAZING FICS BUT DOES ANYONE KNOW PHI WENT?? like she hasn’t updated in 2 weeks? or replied to messages? like does anyone know?? but if she’s on an hiatus without mentioning well idrk but phi’s works make me feel so so soft like super duper fluffy and always read them for a cheer up 

fic recs: ALL SOULMATE SERIES, classmate woojin, boyfriend woojin, and all of wanna one _____

@wannasseu​​ CYN CYN OMG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH PEOPLE CYN IS THE QUEEN OF ANGST if anyone says otherwise FITE ME drown in my tears whenever i read one of her angsts WHICH IS LIKE ALL THE TIME ugh cyn what are you doing to me BUT CONTRARY TO THE ANGSTY FICS SHE WRITES cyn is such a FLUFFY person 

fic recs: ALL HER EX BOYFRIEND SERIES especially seongwoo’s (i ranted to cyn for a straight hour about that fic lol), custard kisses, arranged marriage 

@wannatales​​ GREAT SHORT FLUFFS THAT YALL WANNA READ RECOMMENDING FOR STANS OF MAKNAE LINE since writings are only maknae line works always makes me feel all fluffy and gooey insideeee

fic recs: JACKET GUANLIN (fuck such a cute scenarios can’t deal), fool woojin, milk jihoon

@wannawrite​​ SO MANY FICS FOR SO MANY FANDOMS but like the wanna one master list IS HELLA LONG haven’t ever talked to admin N BUT I LOVE YOUUUUU LAETITA DATITA RISEEEE (is that how to spell it i can’t even remember) BUT ANYWAYS soooooo good fics like always love reading them just genuinely great writings 100% of the time

fic recs: FLOWER BOY SERIES LIKE YESSS, vamp series, i latte you very much minhyun, bffs to bf daniel, colourless soulmate au woojin, this isn’t part of the plot guanlin

@wanna-17​​ CATH OMG MY OLDER FUTURE TWIN IDEK i love you so so much and chatting you is always fun BUT you have so many mtls like wow I'm mind blown BUT YOUR FICS ARE ALSO SUPER GOOD 

fic recs: wanna one first meeting series, and any of the mtls you want to know about

@whatabrightplace​​ AHHH TINA PLEASE PLEASE WRITE FOR WANNA ONE YOUR WRITING IS ALREADY AMAZING AND DON’T BE SCARED JUST TAKE A LEAP OF FAITH wow I'm being rly dramatic but idc i want to see you produce wanna one writing content (did you see what i did there ;) ) ANYWAYS i also wanted to tell you i love youuuu

fic recs: HER RECENT DANIEL SCENARIO FUCK stars + you for our precious mother ariane and basically everything on her masterlist even tho it isn’t wanna one or pd101

@101scenes​​ JUST CUTE ASF SCENARIOS (at least the ones i’ve read) got me squealing and SOFT like such great writing 

fic recs: LATTE ART daniel scenario, guanlin soulmate au, ceo jihoon

TEXT BLOGS (not gonna do fic recommendations cause they’re texts and it’s harder to choose specific ones):

@laignlin​​ LILY I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO TALK TO YOU MORE LIKE TIME DIFFERENCE AND SCHOOL SUCKS but our chats are always the best and it’s always hella nice talking to you BUT YOU’RE ALSO A GREAT WRITER AND AMAZING TEXT MAKER so i ended up putting you in text author lol also IM STILL YOUR PROM DATE but everyone just read through all of lily’s texts and scenarios cause they’re all on point asf

@pwjins​ I GENUINELY ADORE ALLISON BUT SHE HATES ME AND WE HAVE THIS BITCH FEUD THING GOING ON BUT WHATEVER I LOVE HER ALOT AND IK YOU GOING THROUGH A TOUGH TIME AND NEED A BREAK BUT LIKE I’M HERE FOR YOU TUMBLR HERE’S FOR YOU but i love allison’s texts they always make me smile and laugh and like my heart literally warms SHE ALSO WRITES occasionally so check those out and i don’t have any in particular but like the gc texts are always good and the CHANGING THE NAME LIKE LMAO that’s also amazing just check it all out BUT I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ALLISON 

@texts101 YOUR TEXTS ARE SOOOO GOOD JUST THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR MAKING THEM like they never disappoint I LOVE the best friend, boyfriend, gc and name switch texts the most BUT LITERALLY ALL OF YOUR TEXTS ARE AMAZING and ik you taking a hiatus now SO PLEASE TAKE A GOOD REST AND FOCUS ON SCHOOL and don’t stress at all cause all your followers will still be here and ready for your return

@w1talks ANGELA IK YOU DO SCENARIOS AND TEXTS but the scenario list was getting WAYYY TOO LONG to put you there anyways I LOVE YOUR TEXTS AND YOUR SCENARIOS your writing is amazing but your texts are also great LIKE MULTI TALENTED MUCH and I ABSOLUTELY ADORED wanna one finding you went on a date with jinyoung BUT I ALSO ABSOLUTELY ADORE YOUUU

INCORRECT QUOTES BLOGS (not gonna do fic recommendations cause they’re quotes and there are hundreds):

@incorrect-produce101-quotes​ SUPER DUPER FUNNY and like totally could imagine your quotes being said by the guys and love how there’s a lot of the pd101 guys as welll 

@incorrect-wanna-one-quotes​ you were one of the first blogs i followed and your quotes NEVER fail to make me at least smile like i have properly cracked up laughing on multiple occasions because of your quotes and i just feel like my day becomes a little brighter when i see you on my dash

TALENTED ASF GIF MAKERS:

@daewi​ just really nice and cute gifs which are soooo aesthetically pleasing together also all your reblogs are just great AND I ADORE YOUR HS YEARBOOK AWARD THEMES 

@defsouldanik​ LITERALLY IM IN SUCH AWE OF YOU LIKE THE GIFS YOU MAKE IS ALWAYS LIKE THE MOMENTS I WANT GIFFED?? and like all your got7 content makes me happy as well and just THE QUALITY IS SOOO GOOD AS WELL

@kimsjaehwan​ ONE OF MY ULT FAV GIF MAKERS always gifs are so nice and the gifs are always hella good quality just always makes me smile when i see them 

@kngniel​ YOU WANT BASICALLY PERFECT GIFS OF DANIEL HERE IS THE BLOG FOR YOU genuinely so many gifs you’ve made of him smiling and just MAKES ME FEEL SOFTTT 

@ongeuigeon​ SUCH AMAZING GIFS WTF like the gifs in a set always match perfectly with each other in every way AND I LOVE IT WHEN YOU ADD YOUR OWN LITTLE COMMENTS IN it always make the gif that much better 

@parkswoojin REALLY NICE GIFS and like you regularly make new ones so thank youuu for that and just really nice quality AND IN GENERAL A GREAT GIF BLOG TO FOLLOW

@park-woojin​ I LOVE YOU JUST FOR EXISTING AND MAKING WOOJIN GIFS LIKE all of your gifs are so nice and clean and great ass quality AND SINCE ITS WOOJIN i always smile my ass off whenever i see any of your gifs 

@rosybaejin AMAZING ASS GIFS LIKE WOWOOWOWOWOW mind fucking blown y'all AND also in general amazing blog to follow great baejin content

@sungwhoon really pretty high quality edits and gifs AND LIKE THE COLOURS ALWAYS LOOK AMAZING just so nice to look at your gifs

@woojinnies WHAT WOULD WE DO WITHOUT YOU IN THIS FANDOM genuinely believe you are a staple piece of creating gifs in this fandom YOUVE MADE SOOOO MANY AND THEY’RE ALL SOOO GOOD like you have A GIFT just thank youuuu for making your gifs 

OTHER GREAT BLOGS:

@boo-jinyoung​​​ summer you’re an amazing ass dancer like woah and totally a baejin stan even tho you deny it CONSTANTLY and you are a  complete sweetheart everyone follow for HELLA GOOD jinyoung and guanlin content 

@crystalkpop​ I LOVE YOUUU THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH FOR BEING ONE OF MY BIGGEST SUPPORTERS AND LIKING/COMMENTING MY WORKS JUST I APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH

@dearlydaehwi AMAZING DAEHWI CONTENT LIKE DAMN like i love seeing the smol soft bean and you DELIVER like all daehwi stand should follow you just daehwi overload in the absolute best way possible

@extraongdinary LITERALLY PROVIDES ALL THE SEONGWOO CONTENT I NEED and reblogs good ass content SO HAPPY ASF leah ily even tho we’ve never talked you just ultra great 

@fywannaone​ JUST THANK THE LORDS FOR YOU best updates such great pictures literally don’t need to follow any other blogs cause like SO FAST just constantly blessing me with wanna one content SO THANK YOU 

@ricepot-jisung​ I KNOW YOURE A WRITER BUT I HAVEN’T HAD TIME TO READ YOUR WORKS which i bet are amazing AND TBH JUST FOLLOWED YOU BECAUSE YOU REPOSTED GOOD ASS CONTENT AND SEEMED SUPER NICE AND PERSONAL POSTS WERE RELATABLE ASF (whoops wrote all that in caps) 

@soft-baejin BRI we’ve barely talked since i’m never on the gc but you’re super duper sweet and nice and also have a really nice blog and you reblog really good jinyoung content and great content in general 

@wooh00jin SUPER SWEET and adores woojin great ships and i bet you have so many flooding in when ships are open cause you put so much detail into them and GREAT WOOJIN CONTENT  

@asongofmagicandtime | @sewnho | @lai-panlin | thank you for always being nice to me on the gc and I'm sad its not as active as before but all three of you are SUCH SWEETHEARTS and have GREAT ASS CONTENT on your blogs

MY FAVOURITE MUTUALS/CLOSE FRIENDS (which have not been mentioned above or i just felt like putting you here lmao):

@danielsoftgf​ DIAN YOU WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME NO MORE SENDING GIFS OF KOOKIE TAE N WOOJIN LIKE YOU RLY WANNA KILL ME but you so so soft for daniel it’s sweet but also so easy to exploit hehehe but i can see seongwoo just around the corner ;) but genuinely love your blog it’s so so so nice and chatting with you is the best I LOVE YOUUUU

@hyuckland​ OKAY IK WE JUST STARTED TALKING TINA AND I HAVEN’T GOT THE CHANCE TO STALK YOUR BLOG YET so i can’t really properly comment on anything BUT ONE THING I CAN is that you’re an absolute sweetheart and you made me feel SO MUCH BETTER with your messages BUT IK WE’RE GONNA BECOME HELLA CLOSE 

@jaehwansspookywife LUCY LUCY LUCY you are the funniest person ever you are so nice and sweet and hilarious and conversations never get boring w you we don’t talk THAT often but when we do i always genuinely enjoy it love youuuuu ALSO OBSESSED W JAEHWAN DON’T LET HER i don’t think he’s cute FOOL YOU

@kpopsincejune07​ JEN I LOVE YOU you were one of my first fans and you’ve been a huge supporter ever since AND WE BECAME CLOSER and talk when our stupid time zones all us lol and please don’t stress about work and take care of yourself also thank you for always reposting great fics BUT IM WAITING ON YOURSSS PLEASE PLEASE POST YOUR FIC i am waiting till this day for it ily

@ongsecngwoo​ GINNY MY LOVEEEEE i always love talking with you our conversations are always good and hella fun even tho we end up replying hours/days after EH ITS TIMEZONES but also i love your blog it’s so pretty AND THE CONTENT YOU REBLOG just yes yes yes also DONT STRESS ABOUT SCHOOL TOO MUCH AND YOU BETTER TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF but also you haven’t replied to my messages in ages so i hope everything’s okay?? i just love you loads :)))

@parkkwoojin ace we don’t talk as much as before but I STILL CARE AND LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH you’re soon easy to slander but since i promised to be sweet i’m being sweet hehehe BUT GENUINELY YOU POST BOMB ASS GIFS AND ALWAYS IMPRESSED BY THEM and your gifs of woojin OOFT MY HEART DIESSSS just thank you for existing

@porkjeojang SUMMER OMG SUMMER YOU ARE SUCH A SOFT SWEETHEART WHICH I LOVE SO MUCH but you can also be one HELL OF A BITCH sometimes ya know?? also she says she’s loyal to jihoon but IVE SEEN HER EYEING DANIEL UP but she super multi talented making pixels, gifs, mood boards and writing scenarios LIKE TEACH ME YOUR SECRETS but i love you so much and without you my dashboard wouldn’t be complete

@spooky-jihoon NAIA IK WE AIN’T THAT CLOSE BUT YOU WERE ONE OF MY FIRST MUTUALS I TALKED TO sooo i put you here hope you don’t mind I MISS YOU A LOT you’re a literal angel AND PROBABLY THE MOST DEVOTED JIHOON FAN I KNOW like jihoon content right here ppl right here and ik you won’t see this after your hiatus BUT I LOVE YOUU 

@wannabl​ okay hana we haven’t talked in fucking ages cause i felt like you just didn’t really want to chat ya know? especially cause you’re so so busy w irl stuff but like i do really really miss you and i’ve actually sent a few anons saying that i do miss you and wanting to see how you’ll react never got a reply :( but genuinely in awe of how easily you make friends and that you have so many different types of works and i’m so glad you have so many people that recognise that like your anons (and i’m sorry if i was too overly jokingly bitchy) and everyone just go through her master list or just check out her blog cause genuinely such a funny person and has amazing content on there

@wanna-one MERVE you’re my sister/protecter from all things bad (like makeout scenes lmao) but even though you “hate” daniel you have your sweet ASF moments about him you basically confess you love everything about him AND SO MUCH DANIEL CONTENT ON YOUR BLUG BUT you’re always tired and stressed and i wish you were decently okay and happy but remember you’re so sweet ridiculously smart AND i still need to see a photo of you anyways i love you sooooo much and so does daniel ;)

@woojinstinygf OMG KITTY YOU ARE SUCH A SWEETHEART AND PROBABLY THE MOST DEVOTED WOOJIN FAN IK (sorry all those woojin stans out there but like kitty takes it to ANOTHER LEVEL) i always love chatting w you and you always make feel so soft and happy ANYONE WANTS WOOJIN CONTENT OR SWEET WORDS OR ANYTHING ABOUT WOOJIN OR STRAY KIDS LMAO FOLLOW N MESSAGE KITTY (not actually her irl name but she tells ppl to call her that soooo ya)

IM SORRY IF I MISSED YOU PLEASE PLEASE MESSAGE ME SO I CAN ADD YOU ONTO THE LIST 

I LOVE YOU ALL BUT AGAIN VOTE!!!! MAGU MAGUUUUUU!!!!

[itsomgitsgreenblogging]

Break My Heart: Chapter 11 (A Solangelo Fanfiction)

It’s here, finally! I hope you are all ready, because I know I am! Just a reminder, this fic is only very slightly canon divergent (Will having visions of the future, and I take a few liberties with some of the time line). Just a head’s up as a reminder for that. 

Read on Tumblr: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10

Read on AO3

Preview:

“Really Nico? You can’t kill Leo!”

“Can I disembowl him?”

“No.”

“Skin him?”

“No.”

“Tear out his still beating heart and sacrifice it on the altar of my father? Use his blood as finger paint?”

“No Nico, though I give you an A for creativity.”

“This is why I hate this place,” Nico snapped. “All of you are so sensitive about perfectly reasonable things like manslaughter.”

The infirmary that day was empty, and the emptiness was eating at Will until it was nearly impossible for him to function. If he had something to do, then the silence would have been bearable. Will often found that keeping one’s hands busy was the secret to keeping the mind off of unpleasantness. But Will, as always, had terrible luck. So therefore, he was bored and dwelling on things that were probably left alone. Will spun in his chair, playing with the beads on his necklace nervously as he turned. Kayla looked at him from the desk, unimpressed with his fidgeting as Austin tapped out the bass line of Feel Good Inc with pens on a nearby chair while he listened to music on his ipod. Finally Will put his feet down, literally, stopping himself mid-swing. Both his brother and sister stared at him as Will placed his hands on his knees and offered up a sigh of defeat.

“Nico’s totally avoiding me isn’t he?”

“Took him long enough to admit it,” Austin noted as he popped a headphone from his ear. Kayla just primly rested her head on her hands and seemingly waited for Will to continue. Will groaned and leaned back.

“I thought I was just imagining things!” Will complained as he squinted up at the ceiling. “I don’t even know what I did. I thought our date went really well, he even agreed to go on another one! Gods, I must have done something. Maybe I was too hasty. What if I just was being an idiot and assuming things? Oh Gods what if he thinks I’m doing some weird peer pressure thing to him—?”

“Alright, slow down,” Kayla said as she held out her hands. “How about we don’t go into Apollo Panic Mode and try to think.”    

“Don’t tell me not to go into Apollo Panic Mode! You were just in Apollo Panic Mode when you thought Holly and Laurel shot better than you at archery!”

“Okay that is neither here nor there, let’s deal with your problems before you drive everyone crazy!”

Will had the urge to whine. To say he didn’t want to, to throw a hissy fit and then bury himself under some covers and avoid the world. Maybe binge on chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with Lou and Cecil, maybe watch some bad TV dramas with Nyssa and Billie, maybe he could cry on Miranda’s shoulder, throw rocks into the lake with Clarisse, rant to Butch or Pollux, hide in Hypnos Cabin and just nap his days away, cry into the phone to his mom or his grandpa. There really were innumerable options in front of him. Honestly, he was a lucky guy. He had family. He had so many wonderful friends at camp. This bud, this fledgling relationship with Nico hadn’t even made it to autumn so it had to be doomed. What would be the point of trying to continue on with it?

               But Will also wanted to kiss Nico. At least once.

               “I don’t really know what happened. Everything seemed fine at the campfire. But after that…I don’t know, he’s just been distant. Like, he used to follow us along to our activities and he’s not doing that anymore. Maybe I just was going too fast for him, maybe I was just too overeager,” Will admitted softly, flicking a paperclip.

               “Well, maybe the best thing is to give Nico space,” Kayla offered sympathetically. “I mean, it’s not like he’s out to the whole camp. Maybe he’s just processing.”

               “Yeah,” Will said, attempting to brush aside the disappointment. He supposed that rushing forward foolheartedly probably wasn’t the best idea sometimes.

               “Doesn’t your counselor meeting start in a little bit?” Austin asked him, and Will mustered up his best smile.

               “Yeah, I should head over. Hold down the fort for me alright?” Will asked his siblings who both nodded. Will tried to ignore their all-too-understanding looks as he left.

               Ever since the influx of cabins and campers that had occurred post-Titan War, they had moved head counselor meetings from the Big House to the Pavilion. Will was sure when most of the campers left camp the next week and fall really descended on Long Island, they would move back. But for now, the audience of counselors ranged from longtime campers such as himself, Jake Mason, and Pollux, to newcomers like the Victor siblings, recently claimed Paolo, and newly elected Butch and Piper. It certainly made for an interesting hodge-podge. Noticeably Nico was absent. Percy and Jason, who both occupied cabins of only themselves sat together playing paper football while Piper observed and added commentary to the ongoing battle.

               “Where’s Nico at?” Katie asked in their direction as Clarisse unslung Clovis from her shoulder and placed him on the table where he snoozed contentedly in his sleeping bag.  

               “He got a Iris message from Camp Jupiter. Something about the assembly I think Hazel wanted his opinion on,” Percy said with a shrug before seeing Annabeth approach with her arms full of blueprints he got up to help her. Though Annabeth made a show of looking irritated, she allowed Percy to hold some of her things. Will tried to ignore the mix of relief and disappointment he felt.

               The rest of the counselor meeting, as usual devolved rather quickly. Annabeth was presenting to the counselors the different plans she had worked up in order to provide new cabins for the newly claimed campers. Hermes Cabin on the whole was fully throwing their support behind any measure that would get kids out of their already overcrowded cabin as fast as possible. While cabins like Demeter cabin (who were also speaking for the dryads) were against clearing any more forest than necessary, and Hephaestus argued about the onus of construction work that would be placed on them. The different types of arraignments were also a point of contention. Hypnos Cabin, a new cabin that was boasting already three campers with more likely to come from other countries argued the necessity of space (with a rather impassioned Clovis who only fell asleep once), while Paolo, Chiara, and Damien who were all by themselves seemed to be fine with the tree houses or tiny houses plan.

               By the end of the meeting, no compromise had been met. But at least the plans were out. Each Cabin was ordered to take a poll of their occupants and choose the plan that they all liked the most before they would reconvene. After the meeting, Will stayed with Annabeth to help her clean up while the others all went to make sure their younger siblings hadn’t caused any damage.      

                “Will, I don’t understand how you expect the additions to make sense if we allot more space then this,” Annabeth said as she pointed out to the plans for the tiny cabins. 

“And I’m just saying, we don’t know how many children these minor gods have. I feel that it would be premature to commit to a tiny house design without considering that,” Will told Annabeth with a sigh. “Everyone deserves a little space for themselves. I mean, we barely go a week without the Victor sisters almost setting their cabin on fire as it is.” 

Annabeth looked at Will, grey eyes glinting. Her gaze was serious, as always, and Will met it. He liked Annabeth a lot, but sometimes found her to be a little on the intense side. A little too all or nothing. But her penchant for ass-kicking was something that Will admired, even if it was his butt she wanted to kick. She sighed, seemingly content for the moment and leaned back. She massaged her temples and Will found himself moving close and offering his hands. Annabeth gave him a weak, grateful smile before sliding a chair close to him. 

Just pressing his fingers against Annabeth’s temples gave Will the sensation of a tightening cord ready to snap. The start of a tension headache. Will pulled off her hair tie which was doing her head no favors and placing it on his wrist before slowly focusing on pressing the pads of his fingers against the back of her neck and pulling up to her head. He spent time to gently add pressure and release, and become acquainted with Annabeth’s muscle movements. Then, once that was all established, he began rubbing little circles from the base of her skull to her ear, applying pressure on the scalp, and massaging temples and forehead, his power welling up and soothing. 

“You have the most convenient power,” Annabeth muttered as her head fell foreword to allow Will to rub her neck and massage the back of her head.

“As convenient as a certain wisecracking aqua boy we know?” Will asked amused as he worked out a specific knot. Annabeth, like most children of Athena, kept all their stress in the head and neck. Considering their mother’s history with headaches, it wasn’t all too surprising. “I think not.” 

“I don’t think you have much interest in the ocean, how useful would you find Percy’s powers?” Annabeth asked with a raised brow.

“True, true. But does the interest occur as a correlation or causation when the power is present?” Will offered. Annabeth was seemingly struck by this line of thought, tapping her foot as her eyes glinted. 

“It’s never occurred to me,” Annabeth muttered under her breath. “It’s fascinating to think about, really. The implications I mean.”

“I’m not sure the others would think of a lack of free will in the same regards,” Will chuckled. 

“I’ll have to run this by Malcolm. He’s always thrilled to have a sound board on philosophy. I don’t tend to have much of a sustained interest in the subject,” Annabeth said as she stretched, and Will handed back her hair tie.  

“Well, I try not to think about things like that too much,” Will admitted as Annabeth stood up and cracked her neck. “In our lives, big questions don’t often beget rewards.”

“Isn’t that the truth?” Annabeth said as she looked out towards the camp finishing tying up her hair. Will watched as her curls bounced, rather cutely Will had to admit. “I sometimes wonder how much our parents have to do with our natures.”

Will didn’t have much to say about that. Will had never even met Apollo before, only seen him flash by in his chariot during the Battle of Manhattan. He had received a letter from him once, a few birthday cards, had gotten claimed by him. All of these were more than some demigods ever received, but he still had no real clue of what his father was like. He had heard the stories from Percy and Thalia about his father’s bombastic and dramatic nature. Had spoken to Rachel briefly about her relationship with Apollo as the god of prophecy, though since the last war Apollo had gone silent. A punishment by Zeus still probably in the works. At times Will wondered if he should be worried for Apollo. Well, certainly he was worried since Apollo was the sun god and the world couldn’t survive without the sun. But Will found he really couldn’t worry about Apollo as his actual father, because Apollo wasn’t in his life. He was just a flash across the distant sky.

Will wondered how much of him was like Apollo. Will knew he shared a smile with all of his siblings, habits, tastes. Will really doubted Apollo ever concerned himself with Will Solace and his siblings, but he had never been able to say that to any of them. After all, when Lee and Michael had died, not once did Apollo make himself known. Did Will have that ugly selfish side of him somewhere deep down? Will hoped not. He really did.

“I hope they don’t have much,” Will finally concluded, seemingly surprising Annabeth in his answer. “I don’t think I could bear it.”

“I know what you mean,” Annabeth admitted before finishing placing her blueprints in her box. “Tell me something, what’s going on between you and Nico.”

“Uh, what do you mean?” Will asked, taken aback by the sudden shift in conversation to another topic that Will didn’t really want to think about at that moment.

“Listen, me and Nico have had our own issues, but we’re good now. He’s been doing really well since he began tagging along with you and your cabin. But Percy mentioned to me that Nico’s been kinda down lately…and that has to be more so than usual mind you if even Percy’s picked up on it. So I was just wondering if you and Nico had gotten into a fight.”

“We didn’t get into a fight,” Will said as he nudged a leaf with his sandal before sighing. “I asked him out on a date.”

“Oh. Oh,” Annabeth said, obviously taken aback. “You asked Nico on a date? I mean—you know—”

“Yeah. I uh…I like Nico. A lot,” Will told her as he watched the leaf be dragged across the dirt by a breeze. “We went on one date, and I asked him on another. He’s been acting weird since then.”

“Okay, this…this all makes sense to me,” Annabeth told him as she shifted her weight between her feet obviously deep in thought. Will swore he could see the gears clicking and moving in her head, as she catalogued everything she knew into different places. “I do have to say, I didn’t think that after Percy he would go with a guy like you. Even though he swore up and down that Percy wasn’t his type, I kind of expected him to go with a guy more like Percy. Maybe a Hermes Cabin kid or an Ares Cabin kid.”

“I know,” Will said with a chuckle as he picked up Annabeth’s box. “I told him something similar.”

“If it means anything to you, I think you are good for Nico,” Annabeth said as gave him a look and Will handed her box to her. “I think you and Nico are pretty similar in some ways. It makes sense that you guys would get along.”

“You think so?” Will asked Annabeth curiously, and she just shrugged.

“I don’t really buy the whole opposites attract thing. People are always saying that about me and Percy, but me and Percy are a lot alike. Like, I don’t think I could date a guy who is okay just sitting around doing nothing. Percy may put up the front, but he’s always ready to go all in with me no matter what. And I’m always willing to do the same for him. I think that’s important, and that’s just one example. You and Nico are both serious when it comes to your responsibilities. And if anyone has seen either of you interacting with your siblings, you would know you guys were on the same wavelength,” Annabeth explained. “But of course, Nico’s a different person than you so you would need to take that into consideration.”

“What do you mean?”

“Have you told Nico that you like him?”

Will stopped midstep.

“Told…Nico?” Will repeated, dumbfounded.

“Nico’s dense, Will. But more than that, he psyches himself out constantly. Nico’s probably thinking all sorts of worst case scenario stuff right now. You need to set the record straight, tell him that you like him.”

“Oh my gods you are so right. I haven’t been following my own advice,” Will said in shock before tossing Annabeth a smile. “Though there is nothing straight about this situation.”

“Holy Hera, really Will? Really?” Annabeth asked with her patent Chase glare.

“You really can’t blame me, you totally walked yourself into that one,” Will said with a wink.

“Stop flirting with me and go talk to Nico. You have to.”

               “I do. I have to go tell him,” Will realized, his heart racing so fast in his chest that he could hear it in his ears. “I have to tell Nico that I like him.”

               “I agree—”

               It was at that moment that an ear-piercing scream came from the center of the camp. Annabeth dropped the box, and Will and her raced to the center of camp. Nyssa was comforting a nearly hysterical Harley on the ground as Nico held up a scroll that had seemingly floated in on the breeze. A holographic Leo Valdez, riding on Festus’ back with a brunette beauty by his side like the cover of a terrible romance novel for moms had appeared at the center of campus. The image spluttered and faded with static but by the time Will and Annabeth were within hearing distance Will caught,

               “Love ya guys! Adios amigos, oh! And get ready for a taco party when I return!”

               And with that the imagine cut out, leaving a stunned silence in its wake. Nico pulled his hand down which had been shaking and nearly crushing the parchment in his hand but Will clearly saw that Nico was shaking—no, seething, no erupting with rage. His usually colorless eyes were terrifying black pits, his teeth were gritted, and he was steaming up the late summer air with puffs of cold.

               “I am going to murder Leo Valdez,” Nico announced his murderous intent before the various witnesses. Some of them nodded obviously very understanding of the sentiment, others like Percy and Jason face-palmed as the chaos continued to erupt.

               “Uh…maybe I’ll tell him later. When he’s feeling less…homicidal,” Will told Annabeth as he swallowed.

               “Probably a good idea,” Annabeth noted before jogging off to inform her cabin of what had just gone down.

“Why is he so angry?” asked Sherman and when he received the weird looks he shrugged. “Just because I’m a child of Ares it doesn’t mean I’m always angry without a reason. For example I’m always mad at Ellis because he’s a dumbass all the time.” 

“Shut the fuck up,” Ellis grumbled, casting Cecil a look as Cecil cackled under his breath. Lou Ellen jabbed him in the ribs 

“I think that’s why,” Lou Ellen pointed out. 

Harley was still crying against Nyssa’s shoulder softly. Nyssa and Jake Mason sat red eyed and shocked. Nico was pacing beyond as Percy attempted to reason with him quietly. It all felt rather like some kind of late season twist like you would find in a show DeGrassi or Glee or any other trashy high school drama. But Will had to hand it to Leo, he definitely knew how to announce his comeback.  

“Nico, I know you would probably feel much better if you went all stabby mcStabberson on Leo with your scary stabby sword, but has it occurred to you that it would just kill Leo again?” Percy asked him, half-understanding, half on the verge of nervous laughter. 

“Oh but I do. I do want to kill Leo and make sure he stays dead this time,” Nico said with glee before bearing his teeth. “He. Made. My. Sister. Cry. I can’t let him keep breathing. I have my honor to uphold, so I need to utterly destroy him.” 

“Really Nico? You can’t kill Leo!” 

“Can I disembowl him?” 

“No.”

“Skin him?”

“No.” 

“Tear out his still beating heart and sacrifice it on the altar of my father? Use his blood as finger paint?”

“No Nico, though I give you an A for creativity.” 

“This is why I hate this place,” Nico snapped. “All of you are so sensitive about perfectly reasonable things like manslaughter.”

“Stop being a murderous whiny baby!” Percy told him. 

“Why don’t you make me you—“

The Grecian swear Nico used was so foul that Nyssa yelped and clapped her hands over Harley’s ears. Will lunged forward and grabbed Nico’s shoulder and physically got between both Percy and Nico before they could do something stupid like bring the whole camp down around their ears with their collective power. Sherman and Ellis looked rather disappointed, but Lou Ellen and Cecil held them back from joining the fray.

“Okay that’s enough!” Will demanded. “Nico you come with me. Right now—don’t even think about arguing with me so don’t open your mouth a single centimeter. If you do I swear you’ll be speaking in limericks for the next month Apollo protect me! Percy, go cool down in the lake!” 

“Where are we even going?!” Nico demanded as Will grabbed his arm and trudged with him through camp. Will didn’t dare look back, or else he would definitely lose his nerve. No matter how brave he wanted to feel, the cold emanating from Nico like an air-conditioner on full blast was very intimidating. Finally they got to the nearly deserted training grounds. Will pushed Nico in front of a training dummy and handed him a sword from the rack.

“There. You want to stab, stab the dummy. Get out your anger,” Will ordered as he pointed to the dummy, hoping Nico wouldn’t decide that he was a better dummy to stab. Nico stared at Will incredulously before turning to the training dummy. The first few thwacks were half-hearted, but Nico’s hits soon took on a savage angry edge. Every hit Will could imagine bone breaking or puncturing muscle or tearing of skin. Eventually Nico had to slow down, breathing heavily and still glaring forward while not giving Will any sign of his weakness as he went through positions seamlessly, but he was no longer 10 below.

“This is stupid,” Nico spat towards the very beaten practice dummy.  

“I don’t understand why you are so angry, but you are and here we are,” Will said as he sat on a log.

“You don’t understand,” Nico growled, whirling on Will. “Leo is out there trapezing around and you don’t understand?”

“He’s alive! You should be happy. You even said that he would be coming back,” Will said as he threw his hands in the air. “Honestly, Nico. What is going on with you?”

“Happy? Happy that…that idiot died, leaving only pain for those who loved him and thought he was dead, only to send some sort of half-baked message like that?” Nico demanded of Will. “What about my sister—my sister who agonized over Leo? Why didn’t he rush back for her? Or his siblings? Or anyone else?”

“He obviously went back for that girl.”

“Ha. He went back for Calypso. How fitting. The two of them ducking their fates and riding off into the sunset,” Nico said as he stabbed at the ground angrily as if imagining their faces there.

“So that’s it? You’re mad because of that? You aren’t mad because he hurt your feelings?” Will asked him calmly, brushing aside the fact that Nico was saying that somehow Leo had gotten Calypso, the famed nymph, to fall in love with him. Now that was a story Will wanted to hear at some point, if Nico didn’t kill him first.

“I don’t have any feelings,” Nico snarked as he threw the sword he was holding back in the pile.

“Nico—”

“Gods, why can’t anyone just stay. For the sake of the gods, why does everyone just have to go and—“ Nico muttered under his breath before grinding his teeth. “But obviously I’m just crazy, right? Everyone just loves me. No one was ever uncomfortable with me and wanted me to leave, right? Everything is just peachy keen. It’s just all in Nico di Angelo’s head, he’s just some wacky child of Hades, he’s just crazy. He’s not allowed to be hurt, or angry, or anything because he’ll just blow everything for everyone with his uncontrollable powers.”

“Nico, is this about the battle? What I said to you?” Will asked, totally floored at the sudden change. There was a growing pit in his stomach, as flashes of childbirth, Half-Blood Hill torn by the battle, and a pale and ghostly Nico di Angelo came back to him. “When I was telling you to stay?”

“Just forget it—”

“No, I won’t,” Will said firmly. He swallowed, trying to work past the suddenly lump in his throat. Will was ashamed and he could barely breathe. “I…I’ve never meant to tell you that how you felt wasn’t valid. How you feel is important to me. Really, it is. I’m…I’m so sorry that the way I said things made you feel otherwise. Oh Gods, I’m a total asshole. You must think I’m an absolute asshole.”

“Wait, what’s happening—are you crying?” Nico demanded, sounding horrified.

“No,” Will lied, equally embarrassed as he rubbed his face. Will was just as horrified at his sudden show of emotion as Nico was, his face was hot and his tears were warm and he wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there forever. “Yes.”

“Oooh my gods, di immortales, please, please stop crying,” Nico begged Will. “Oh gods I hate it when you cry. Please stop crying. This is my fault, it has to be my fault.”

“No, it’s my fault! It’s all my fault because I’m an idiot,” Will said impassioned at his utter stupidity. Suddenly everything was so clear to him. Nico wouldn’t break up with him because of anything that Nico found wrong with Will. It would be because Will was too caught up in himself and what he was feeling to be good for him. “I haven’t considered your feelings, not really, this whole time and I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

“I…I forgive you,” Nico said slowly, but with feeling. “I do.”

“Is this why you’ve been avoiding me?” Will asked him softly.

“I…no…kind of…it’s complicated,” Nico said as his hands hung by his sides limply. “I just…I had a lot of fun on our date, Will. But I…there’s probably other people that you would rather go on dates with and…you are so nice to me. I just don’t want to feel like I’m being a burden on you.”

“Nico?”

“Yeah?”

“You aren’t a burden on me. I didn’t go on that date with you because I’m nice. I went on that date with you and I want to keep going on dates with you because I like you.”

Will woke up feeling chilled, sighing heavily. He didn’t want to get up yet, as his blankets and quilts were so utterly and deliciously warm, but finally Will forced himself out from the bed. The air was chilled, and Will enjoyed the scent of autumn was on the wind as he walked to the infirmary. It wasn’t like there was anyone in the infirmary, but there was a Keurig, and with a Keurig there was coffee.

He sat at the stoop of the Big House, sipping his coffee and watching the sky turn pearly, the edges just beginning the lighten in dawn. The sun was calling to him, and he waited patiently for it to rise as his coffee wafted and steamed in the air.

“Good morning Will,” Chiron said, hooves clopping as he stood beside him.

“Good morning,” Will greeted the teacher. “It’s a beautiful sunrise isn’t it?”

“That it is,” Chiron hummed, taking a sip of his own coffee as he rubbed his beard thoughtfully. “It has been a long time since I’ve enjoyed a sunrise, but I find no better company than the one I share with right now for it.”

“Now you’re just buttering me up for something,” Will said with an attempt at teasing, but his heart wasn’t really in it. He let his smile fall from his face, and continued to gaze ahead thoughtfully as the sky began to turn orange, brushstrokes of red deepening against the darkness and brightening with a shock of color. From there one could see the horizon stark against the sea, opening up the world to a bright new day. Will was so absorbed in his thoughts that he barely caught what Chiron was saying to him.

“Will, I believe I heard something about you and Nico,” Chiron said, and Will frowned as he wished he hadn’t heard Chiron at all.

“Oh,” Will said slowly, resisting his urge to blow bubbles in his coffee, however Will couldn’t bring himself to be rude to Chiron or duck the question. Chiron, who had let Will stay, who had taught Will how to suture a wound and perform an appendectomy and who seemingly knew Will better than he knew himself was someone he couldn’t lie to that easily. “Uh…yeah, that’s not happening. I kind of messed everything up, as usual.”

“As usual? I was under the impression that you only truly attempted to romance one girl previous,” Chiron said with an arched brow.

“Uh…Chiron, please, if we could avoid any blows to my ego I would be real grateful,” Will drawled slowly.  

“I didn’t mean to—” Chiron cut himself off and seemingly reformulated whatever he wanted to say, his hind quarters shifted and plodded nervously on the ground. “I do not have extensive experience with romantic issues. Granted, the only romance that I’ve been involved with is the romance of other demigods with each other, and even then I preferred to stay out of it. Forgive me for my lack of tact.”

“You are forgiven,” Will promised Chiron immediately, not having it in his heart to hold that against Chiron. “I guess I just don’t really know what to do. I made my feelings as clear as possible, but Nico just kind of…well, he freaked out and ran off. Maybe I was just too forward, but what else could I have done? I wanted him to know how I feel, but I’m sorry if I sprung it on him. Though, I don’t think he’ll appreciate my apology after my sudden declaration of love.”

“Love? I see, love.”

“Yeah.”  

“I have to admit,” Chiron said as he obviously hid a smile, “that part of you is from your father. No one has more of a penchant for sudden declarations of love than he does.”

“Oh, great, and those seem to always go so well for him,” Will grumbled under his breath. “Well, thankfully my track record isn’t that bad. No one’s turned into a plant yet.”

“Well, this is also true,” Chiron chuckled before placing a hand on Will’s shoulder. “But as I was saying before, if I may give you some advice Will? In manners of the heart, it is valid to plunge forward recklessly. Some people can’t do that, and must take a moment to stop and think. Give Nico time to think.”

“You think he might come around? Or at least forgive me?” Will asked, recalling Nico retreating back to his cabin after his declaration without a single word, just a pale white ghost. As far as Will knew, he hadn’t once emerged from the cabin the whole rest of the day or night, and as far as anyone could tell he may or may not have even been at Camp Half-Blood anymore.

“I can’t say. But I’ll have you know, I’ve given this advice to your brothers before.”

“Great, which ones?” Will asked as he watched the waves crash against the shore from the distance, the waves of long grass being tussled gently.

“Michael and Lee, at different times of course,” Chiron said, the look on his face fond and gentle. Will had meant his comment as a joke, but suddenly he felt that lump return to his throat. Michael and Lee were hardly ever talked about by anyone, except to talk about how they died. Will had almost forgotten that they had lived outside the sacred place in his heart he had built for them. “Wait for Nico’s response patiently, Will. Wait for him, and listen to him well when the time comes. And when it does, you will choose how it plays out for you. But know that I am rooting for you, Will Solace.”

Will smiled the best he could before he finished sipping his coffee and promised that he would talk to Chiron later. He returned the mug to the proper sink before deciding that the best thing he could do would be to head back to his cabin. He could wake up his siblings, get going on the day—

“Will.”

Will yelped, tripped on a tree root and promptly wiped out. He groaned as he managed to pull himself up, before looking back to see Nico staring at him half-emerged from the shadows. He was pale except for the shadows that ridged around his eyes, he looked generally grungy like he had been for a long and sweaty hike in the woods, his clothing was disheveled and slightly torn.

“Oh my gods, you look terrible,” Will blurted out.

“Oh, wow, thanks,” Nico said with a grimace that pulled hard as his lips.

“What happened?” Will said, seeing blood dripping down his arm.

“I…uh…went for a run.”

“A run?” Will asked with a raised eyebrow. “And you got this beat up during a run?”

“I also might have run into a flock of Stymphalian birds on this run,” Nico explained. Will just sighed, put his head in his hands for a moment as he attempted to collect himself before pulling up to his feet.

“Well, come on then. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Nico was quiet as he let Will lead them back to the infirmary. Nico took a shower in the bathroom while Will collected the supplies he would need for the first aid. None of Nico’s various scrapes, bruises, or cuts would need healing magic, but they did need disinfectant and gauze. Will worked robotically as he tended to Nico’s wounds. When he offered the unicorn draught, Nico didn’t complain, but when Will began lining up other products and ordered Nico to wash his face Nico was hesitant.

               “Stop grumbling and rinse,” Will ordered, and Nico splashed his face free of the suds.

“I don’t understand why we’re doing this,” Nico grumbled as Will pulled back the headband to keep his hair from getting any wetter before drying his skin and then patting on the toner.

“Because a good skin care routine is important and will keep you from looking like death warmed over,” Will told Nico a matter-of factly as he grabbed the eye cream. “Close your eyes.”

“It’s cold,” Nico commented suspiciously, though he allowed Will to continue without biting his fingers off. “What does this have to do with healing?”

“In the humble words of a wise person, treat yo’self.”

“But isn’t ten steps excessive?”

“Okay, unless one is a certain gorgeous child of Aphrodite, bless her heart, one does not have perfect skin. We work for perfect skin. It’s a necessity.”

“You are just a vain child of Apollo. Normal people do not care about their skin this much.”

“Ha, please. Don’t make me laugh,” Will commented as he finished putting on the moisturizer. “There, you look like a human again.”

“I’m not a human though, neither are you,” Nico commented wryly as he pulled on his shirt.

“Then we are just both vaguely human shaped and we have a charade to uphold,” Will told him as he put away his things into their various shelves.

“You know, I didn’t really know what to expect when you told me to come here,” Nico said as he swung his legs, not unlike a child would. “I didn’t really know what to think about you either. You weren’t scared of me, you were easy to talk to. You were funny, but you took what I had to say seriously. When I found out I might have a chance, you know, when you were joking with Antonio that one time, and when I saw Nyssa and Billie together, I freaked because I was so surprised and happy. It’s stupid, but most of the people I like end up hating me so I tried to convince myself that it wasn’t worth it giving it a shot. Percy told me that sometimes you just got to dive in, but I can’t really do that. Whenever I do that someone always gets hurt. Eventually…I don’t know how or when, I’ll hurt you. I’ll be selfish and I’ll hurt you. But…but for some reason I felt like you might be able to handle it but then I suddenly got so terrified that I…so I…godsdamnit I’m not making any sense am I?”

Nico was glaring at the floor ferociously, as if the floor had just insult him, his father, his sister, and his dog. Will sat next to him on the bed, at the creak of the springs Nico looked up.

“I like you, Nico,” Will said, because that was all he could say. He looked towards Nico, hoping that a fraction of what he was feeling was being conveyed to him somehow. His words weren’t enough, but maybe the rest of it could be.

“You said that before,” Nico said with a glare and narrowed eyes.

“But I do,” Will argued. “I really, really like you.”

“Did you not hear anything I just said,” Nico demanded with a huff.

“I did. And I know, Nico. I already know that you’ll probably hurt me and I might hurt you, but I still like you,” Will promised Nico firmly. “Trust me, I know it better than anyone. I’ve been agonizing over that for a while now, but I’m ready for whatever happens, because I like you. Do you like me?”

“I…I do,” Nico answered.

“Then do you want to go out with me?” Will asked him curiously.  

“If you go out with me, I’m going to need a little bit of time…before we tell everyone. Just so I can get used to it,” Nico warned him.

“I can wait,” Will promised, grasping Nico’s hand. Nico squeezed his hand in return.