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thatmultifandomhoe · 4 years ago

Text

It’s You

Pairing: Changkyun and Reader

Group: Monsta X

Word Count: 7,433

Genre/Rating: Valentine’s Day AU - Quarantine AU - Friends to Lovers AU - Fluff - Angst - PG-13

Overview: The last thing you planned to do was celebrate Valentine’s Day. Being single on a holiday that glorified love, especially during a pandemic, was the perfect sign to stay at home to guarantee avoiding having a broken heart. Especially when Changkyun, the one who held it, seemed to have plans of his own.

Warning: Mention of past unrequited love and having a broken heart - swearing -

A/N: Happy - early - Valentine’s Day sweet peas! And yes, Changkyun from Monsta X was the winner of the “Who Do You Want to Spend Valentine’s day With,” and I had so much fun working on this piece. I’m personally not a fan of the holiday - for reasons you’ll read below - but I hope that those of y’all who do celebrate have a happy Valentine’s day, and I hope that y’all enjoy this piece and get all the chocolate that you want this year!

Tagging: @srvdyv @skyys-universe @kpophoneybunny @wheein-whanders @ezralia-writes

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The First Installment of the Hoe Catalog.

©thatmultifandomhoe 2021. Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without permission.

“Are you okay?”

Glancing over at the cell phone that was propped up on the dresser, you raised an eyebrow at the black screen. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You do know what day it is, right?”

Fingers pausing, you pressed your lips together, staring down at the button of the black jeans you had been in the middle of putting on. You had known what day it was when you went to turn off the alarm that had set for that morning. It had been painfully obvious, and as the pre-recorded song of birds chirping increased in volume, you had stared at the date for longer than you normally do.

February fourteenth.

Valentine’s Day.

“I’ve only been awake for an hour,” you said, stepping towards the closet for a shirt. It had been a miracle that Changkyun had called instead of his preferred method of randomly video calling. While it was true, you had been up for an hour, you had only started moving about to get on with the day about five minutes ago. And currently you were only wearing pants and a black lacy bra. Although, knowing him, he wouldn’t have complained.

There was rustling on his end and the clinking of a spoon hitting a glass. “I know, but I just wanted to make sure. You seemed pretty upset the other day.”

“It’s not that I’m upset…” You slipped your head through the hole of a black smocked square blouse with red flowers printed on it, adjusting the top so it sat properly. “I just...don’t like the holiday.”

Which was putting it mildly. It was more than a dislike, but as you went to look in the mirror to make sure there weren’t any tags sticking out, you silently thanked him for calling. You never hated Valentine’s Day. At its core, it was rather a sweet concept, one that year after year, a part of you hoped that maybe you’d be able to have someone to enjoy the holiday with. But after years of being single on the most romantic day, and having it ruined by dates turned sour, more often than not a dark cloud hovered overhead while you tried to simply get through the day.

You tried to find some spin on it to turn it around. Starting tomorrow and for the next week, chocolate was going to be anywhere from fifty to seventy-percent off. Sales were always fantastic no matter what the reason was. There were only so many chocolate hearts that you were capable of eating though.

“Why are you calling so early?” You said, turning the conversation back to him. It made sense why you were up – even on a Sunday there was always work to be done – for him to be awake before noon, that caused a bit of worry.

“Ah,” there was a thump that echoed on the call like he had dropped his phone, his voice sounding distant. “I have some things to get done today.”

“Yeah, but it’s nine in the morning. I thought you weren’t even coherent before noon.”

Changkyun forced out a laugh and you lightly smiled, gathering your hair into a bun before carrying him into the kitchen. Even though it was a simple phone call and was a bit distorted, it did nothing to dull the fluttering going on by the butterflies in your stomach. His lazy grin came to mind, and only ten minutes into the hour and you were smiling like a fool while stirring your coffee.

That was another reason why you weren’t entirely fond of the holiday. The entire day was dedicated to love, to telling someone that you love them, and here you were, having fallen for your friend and yet you refused to tell him. It was hard to pinpoint when these feelings began, but it was possible that they had been growing since the day you two met.

There was no doubt that you were a workaholic, always feeling weird if you bummed around for more than a few hours, so it made sense that on the rare day off that you took, something had to crash it. You had been indulging in some binge watching of your precious Inuyasha when your phone lit up with an incoming video call from Messenger. Immediately you had been hesitant. None of your friends ever video messaged you since unlike them, your cell was an android.

You hadn’t planned to answer him. Not only did you not recognize the name, or his picture - despite how attractive he appeared - but you didn’t normally answer requests from strangers. With that in mind and mildly annoyed in having to pause the episode, you were ready to hit decline and be on with the day. Except, you were a dumb ass, and hit accept by accident.

Turns out he had meant to call someone else and had been equally shocked when you answered. In fact, he had been less than classy upon seeing you in instead of his friend, the words, ‘oh, fuck me,’ slipping out before he could stop himself.

In normal circumstances, you might have rolled your eyes, or told him to go fuck himself, but it had been six months into the pandemic and he was the first new person that you had met in a while.

“I don’t usually fuck strangers,” you had said instead, not missing the way his eyebrow rose and how his mouth curled upwards in a smile. “But if you wanna buy me a grinder and have it delivered to my place; I might eventually be persuaded.”

There had been a tense moment, but when he let out a breathless chuckle, somehow you knew that you were in the safe zone. Turns out, the two of you had a friend in common who he had meant to call, but he hadn’t been paying attention to what he was doing and accidentally clicked on your profile. The call only lasted for a few more minutes before Changkyun apologized and with an awkward wave, ended it. You stared at his profile picture and next thing you knew, you were scrolling through his pictures, oohing upon finding an old one of him with silver hair and an eyebrow piercing.

A couple hours later, there was a knock at your door and after slipping on a mask, you were greeted with a delivery man that looked no older than sixteen, announcing that he had a grinder for you. Before you could say that you hadn’t ordered anything, he promised that it had already been paid for, tip included. Not one to turn down free food, you accepted it, and saw the note that was taped to the paper bag.

I’m not a weirdo I promise. Jooheon passed along your address, and I’m not about to let someone go hungry. From, a friendly stranger who hit the wrong button.

There was no second guessing on your part. You pulled his profile back up and hit the video button, only having to wait a few seconds before his face filled the screen, locks of black hair falling across his forehead as he ruffled it up.

“Did you seriously send me a grinder?”

“You sounded hungry.”

There was a brief pause, and suddenly you were giggling, shoulders shaking as you sat down on a chair, his own deep chuckles joining in not long after. It was odd, but after that – and after confirming with Jooheon to make sure he wasn’t a creep, which you were assured he wasn’t – the two of you fell into the habit of video chatting. Some days there was nothing to say. With the pandemic raging on and everything closed, it was nice to have someone simply be there after all this time.

Fast forward five months later, the pandemic had only grown worse, and not only had Changkyun proven to be a good friend, but he managed to worm his way into your heart.

“What about you,” Changkyun suddenly asked. “You’re not actually working today, are you? Forget the holiday, it’s Sunday.”

Rolling your eyes, you went back to the bedroom with the black coffee in one hand, and him in the other. “Not all day. I have a few graphics that I want to finish up or it’ll bug me. Should only take a few hours to do.”

“Only a few hours,” he teased. “I’m willing to bet you’ll still be working tonight.”

“Will not.”

“Will too.”

“Not.”

His end grew silent, and he suddenly cleared his throat. “We’ll see about that.”

There was something about that sentence that stopped you from entering the password to your computer. Glancing away from the screen, you stared at Changkyun’s picture, wondering why his voice had softened when he had said that, as if he knew something that you didn’t.

“What is it that you have to do?” You found yourself asking him again, not looking at the keys as you logged into your laptop, the bleeding hearts screensaver appearing as the icons loaded one by one.

“Just some…stuff. I’ll probably be off my phone most of the day.”

“Oh.”

With the amount of phone calls and video chats the two of you had, it had become normal to hear from him a couple times throughout the day. The text chat was filled with various memes, emojis, and conversations that ranged from how much is too much fabric softener? - all the way to late night conversations involving stories about crazy exes, to insecurities, dreams you’ve always wanted to do, and whether or not the world would ever go back to the normal that you both had known prior to March 2020.

Wetting your lips, you leaned back against the desk chair and cradled the mug in both hands. “Well, have fun with whatever you’re doing,” you said, keeping your voice light so he wouldn’t notice the shift in your mood.

It was suddenly so obvious why he wasn’t saying what he had to do. With the holiday approaching, Changkyun had asked if you had any plans for how to spend the day, and with that came your explanation for why you weren’t overly fond of this particular day. The blind dates that ended terribly and being single had been part of the reason why, but there was one particular instance from the past that was determined to ruin Valentines every year for you.

In all the years, there was one person that you had confessed to on Valentines. Jungkook was someone you considered a friend, but you had only told him the truth to get him to shut up about his girlfriend. Up until that afternoon she had been the ex that, from your understanding, despised being in the same room as him anymore. According to him, she showed up at his place with the usual, ‘I miss you,’ and ‘let’s try again,’ and somehow that all managed to lead to wild and hot passionate sex that was, ‘insanely good.’

If only that had been it.

Whether Jungkook got caught up in reliving the moment and forgot who he was talking to, he gave you a play by play of their reunion. From the way she arrived at his door, to the way she felt around him, he told every detail all while you were on the other end of the phone, fingers twisted and tugging at your hair as you sat on the floor of your childhood bedroom. On all the days, the last thing you wanted to hear was your crush talking about having to move to the living room because his bedroom reeked from all their fucking.

The conversation didn’t last much longer, thank god, but you hadn’t been able to grieve because in the other room mom’s voice could be heard as she talked about her day at work. Instead, you forced back the tears and it took everything to not break down when she smiled and handed you an orange teddy bear holding a red heart that said I love you, along with a bag of Lindt chocolates. She was unaware, and while everyone slept, you buried your face into a couple pillows to muffle the sounds of your crying. You were only eighteen and yet you swore your heart collapsed in on itself before exploding into a million glass shards.

“That fucking dick,” Changkyun had said when you told him.

The screen had been bright as the two of you video chatted, and you rubbed your eyes, tired but not ready to go to sleep. He had been doing the rounds of locking up and shutting off the lights while you spoke, only wearing a thin pair black and blue flannel pants. At least he held the phone pretty leveled so you weren’t forced to stare at his torso, but there had been several times where you found your gaze lingering on his muscular body.

“I mean,” you ran a hand through your hair, shrugging as he looked back at you. “It happens to everyone.”

Changkyun frowned though. “No,” he said, his voice gentle but firm at the same time. “No, it doesn’t. And that shouldn’t have happened to you.”

Blinking, you forced the memory away, shifting in your seat to get comfortable once again. Just because you didn’t enjoy the holiday, or didn’t have anyone to spend it with, didn’t mean that was the case with Changkyun. Why else would he be reluctant to say what his plans were? He was probably just being nice and didn’t want to appear like he was rubbing salt into an old wound that refused to heal.

“Hey,” Changkyun’s voice softened again, and as much as you knew you shouldn’t, you wished that he was here, in the apartment with you for him to hold you. “It’s still early in the morning. For all you know, there’s a Mr. Right, who’s going to stumble into your path today.”

You scoffed, the clicking of your mouse echoing in the bedroom. “I mean, I don’t have plans to go out.”

“Surprises can happen you know.”

“Alright Changkyun,” now that the internet was up, you glanced back at the phone. “I gotta get to work. Stay safe out there.”

“Always am. Talk to you later.”

“Bye.”

There was a pause, and when you looked back over, the call was still going. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for either of you to leave it going while doing work, the silence was never awkward, it was more comforting than anything, but this time there was a sense of something being left un–

“You look pretty today,” Changkyun said suddenly.

Blinking, your fingers tightened around the mouse as your heart raced. “What? You can’t even see me Changkyun.”

“So?”

“I could be wearing my pajamas for all you know,” your voice faltered, and despite the constriction of wearing jeans, you pulled your legs up on to the chair to hug them to your chest.

“I’ve already seen you in your pajamas,” he joked. “You’re still pretty though.”

He was smiling. You knew for certain that he was, and that made your palms turn clammy, forcing you to wipe them against the pant leg.

“Maybe I’m not, wearing clothes?” Internally you slapped yourself, instantly regretting those words, and perhaps your entire existence at this point. It was still early. Instead of work, maybe you could possibly bury yourself under all the blankets and never answer his phone calls again.

Hearing shuffling coming from the phone, you pressed your lips together, not entirely sure if you wanted to hear what he had to say.

“Are you trying to keep me from my plans today?” His voice deepened and if it weren’t for the fact that you were already sitting down, you were certain that you’d be on the floor.

“No, I’m just stupid,” you blurted out, slamming your hand over your mouth.

Changkyun chuckled, and suddenly the phone seemed closer to him because his voice became clearer. “I think you’re trying to seduce me.”

Oh god. No. It was absolutely the other way around. He was the one who had the advantage on his side, between the lip bites and the selfies he sent that captured his jawline that was perfect to cut glass with. Whether it was his godly features, or when the two of you were video chatting and he rolled onto his stomach and face planted himself into the pillow, you fell for him every time.

“Know what?” You rushed to say, ignoring his laughter. “I have work and you have things to do. Stay safe, and I’ll talk to you later. Bye!”

There was no hesitation. This time you slammed your finger on the end call button and for extra measure, tossed it away and on the bed, letting it disappear among the sea of messy blankets.

Shakily sighing, you slid further down in the chair as the edge of the desk pinned your legs to your chest to keep from falling to the ground. He had never said anything like that before. Sure, there were times where he’d see you do something or when you’d ramble on about a show or work, he’d might say cute, but that always felt like an afterthought.

“Damn it Changkyun,” you said, glaring at where you had thrown the phone and hating the fact that his words kept circling around your mind, making you feel incredibly warmer than you had been ten minutes earlier. Hating that while he was probably going to be on a date with some pretty girl who was worth his time, you were at home, working on a Sunday, wishing that the guy you hadn’t even met in person was here and telling you that in-between kisses.

You ran a hand over your face with a groan, fingers of course getting caught in the bun briefly as you sat up. There was work to be done, and with a click of the mouse, the programs you needed quickly opened up. It was fairly easy, and if you focused, would only take an hour, maybe even less to get done. But with Changkyun on the brain, all you wanted to do was curl back up under the messy blankets and daydream about him. About what it would be like to hug him, to hear his voice in person, and perhaps, spend a Valentine’s day with someone who wouldn’t let you down.

That wasn’t going to happen though. It was a daydream and nothing more.

Lacing your fingers together, you quickly turned them inward, groaning in satisfaction at the loud crack that emitted from the joints. Outside the window that the desk was placed in front of, the sun had already begun its descent for the night. The sky was painted in splashes of orange with lazy clouds slipping in, the remaining bits of blue falling steadily behind.

Despite what Changkyun had predicted, he was only partially correct. With him swimming freely in your mind, you had been distracted, lost in a hazy daydream that made it impossible to focus on the graphics that you were trying to finish up. More often than not you stepped away from the desk, feet guiding you to the other room or in small twirls with the faintest lovesick smile. It was impossible to get anything done. So, you said fuck it. It was Sunday after all, and you weren’t expected to have those scheduled to be posted for a few days. Where was the harm in having one day to yourself? One with no work whatsoever to stress you out?

With work out of the way and having no other plans, another cup of coffee had been made and in the spirit of the holiday, your gaze had lingered on the makeup that sat on the dresser. Most of it had gone unused as the weeks melted into months. Tubes of lipstick and eye shadow palettes once loved had been forgotten about, and as you recalled, the brushes that you typically forgot to clean had been washed out of pure boredom. It was with new motivation that you grabbed a majority of the collection and hopped onto the counter in the bathroom, music playing from a playlist filled with songs from your younger years that held nostalgia, and simply played around with the colors.

By the time you were done, an hour had gone by, and you gained two cut creases with glitter, contoured cheeks, painted your lips, and looked like you were ready to go out for a date out in the city to be wined and dined. Instead, you slipped on a pair of fuzzy socks and slid into the kitchen with plans to see what frozen meal the freezer had to offer. If anything, it had the bare bones of a date. The location? Your couch. The hot leading man? Most likely the main character from whatever show you finally decided on after you gave a good scroll through Netflix. All you needed was utter disappointment and it could be considered a success.

You were torn between making the decision for frozen lasagna or chicken Alfredo, but a sudden and loud knock at the door stopped you. Eyebrows pulling in confusion, you carefully set the food on the counter, taking a moment to slip on the mask that you left hanging on the doorknob for situations like this. Not that they occurred often. With the exception of having food delivered, once the world realized that this pandemic wasn’t just a simple flu and doctors encouraged people to stay home, you hadn’t invited anyone over. It was lonely, and you missed your friends and family greatly, but this wasn’t a situation to take lightly.

“I’m sorry,” you said, opening the door once the fabric mask was securely on. “I think you might have the wrong…”

And you stopped. Stopped talking and stared. Stared at the man leaning against your door frame, wearing a black as ink suit jacket, a pristine white button up shirt was tucked into matching black pants, with the top several buttons undone to reveal a tanned and toned chest that you knew he took pride in considering all the gym selfies he sent. The black fabric mask he wore hid most of his face, but the corners of his eyes were crinkled together.

“I think I’m right where I’m supposed to be,” Changkyun said, his deep voice sounding better in real life than you had expected, and dreamed of.

He pushed off of the frame and it was then that you noticed the things in his hands. In the left, was a plastic bag stuffed with packaged containers, and in the right…in his right wrapped in pink tissue paper was a bouquet of red and pink carnations with babies’ breath mixed in. There had to be at least a dozen, perhaps a baker’s dozen, if not a few extra.

There were no words. After all the books you consumed to pass the time, articles you searched for work, and even countless texts sent to friends, everything escaped you at that very moment because he was here. He was actually here and standing in front of you.

“I know you said you haven’t had anyone over since this started. But I got tested a couple days ago, came back negative, and we’ve both been working from home this entire time so if you want…” Changkyun lifted the bag he held into view and this time, you could see that even though it was triple bagged, you were able to make a red dragon printed on the cartons. “I have Chinese food, and I’m willing to bet that Netflix has something for us to watch. If you’re not comfortable though that’s fine. I have plenty of food that we can—”

Except he didn’t get to finish what he was saying before you tugged him into the apartment by his arm. Immediately, your arms wound their way around his waist and you pressed your face into his chest, tightly hugging him.

“It’s you,” you said, feeling his right arm carefully rest on your back to hold you close, all while being mindful of the flowers that he was carrying.

There was a soft chuckle from above as he laid his head on top of yours. “It’s good to finally see you too.”

Smiling, your arms tightened around him once more before you stepped backwards, letting him enter the apartment completely. “You didn’t have to bring flowers you know.”

“And show up empty handed?”

You gestured towards the table for him to set the food down, taking the flowers and going to the sink. “You bought Chinese food. That more than would have made up for no flowers.” But while the vase filled with water and you trimmed the stems, gently adding them in one by one, there was a warmth spreading within your chest that came right from the heart, even more so when he chuckled. The only people to ever buy you flowers on Valentine’s day were your parents.

Like always, the silence that followed felt natural. The only difference was that you were aware that Changkyun was moving around in the kitchen with you, getting plates and silverware out without having to ask where things were because he had seen you do the same thing countless times before while video chatting. You just never thought he was actually paying attention.

When they were all in the vase, you tossed the ends in the trash and turned around, only to see that once again, he was watching you.

“Why are you staring?”

Changkyun shrugged, running a hand through his hair as the black locks fell right back into his eyes. “I was right.”

Tilting your head, you walked over to the table and set the vase in the center. You were already so close to him, but he leaned his head down, the black fabric of his mask brushing against the top of your ear.

“That you look pretty,” he said softly. “And it’s not because of the makeup. I had a feeling you might dress up today; you look beautiful.”

The air that you had been breathing was instantly stolen, and when you made the mistake of looking up at him, you realized just how close the two of you were. If it weren’t for the masks you both wore…

“You don’t look half bad yourself,” you teased, trying to not glance at where his lips would be. “You’re a lot taller than messenger video makes you out to be.”

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. Straightening up, Changkyun slipped his suit jacket off and set it on the back of a chair to undo the buttons on his cuffs, taking the time to roll each sleeve up to his elbows. “You’re meaner in person.”

Good god. You knew that he worked out, but damn. Maybe not for the first couple weeks, eventually Changkyun fell into the habit of sending selfies while he was working out at the gym. It shouldn’t have been a surprise, but seeing his tanned arms and the white sleeve making its way up to his elbow, it sparked the butterflies and gave them a newfound fluttering energy.

“Do you wanna eat or not?” Not thinking of it, you reached up to unhook the elastic from around your ears, removing the mask and setting it back on the counter. With a glance up at him, you saw him raise an eyebrow before he mimicked your movements to take off his own mask, revealing the jaw that tempted your daydreams in more ways than you wished.

He smiled, and you handed him his plate and together, the two of you fixed up heaping plates of Chinese food, using the concept of needing to eat to distract yourself. Everything was still hot and as you settled on the couch, steam curled its way up into the air.

“Were you able to get your secret plans done today?” You asked, glancing over at him while Netflix loaded up on the TV screen.

“Why are you so interested in what I had to do?” He was focused on the dumpling that he held with the chopsticks, not meeting your gaze at all.

It wasn’t that you meant to be focused on that. But he had acted so suspicious on the phone earlier, and now he was here, having dinner in your apartment with enough Chinese food to cost a small fortune, along with sixteen carnations – yes, you counted while cutting them – on Valentine’s Day. There had been no warning, and as much as you wanted to believe that he was here for more than a friendly drop in, the idea of him having been on a date earlier in the day and was here to talk about it, about the possible other girl, killed the butterflies. You had already been through this once, you didn’t want to go through it again. Not with him.

Scrolling through the list of suggestions, you didn’t notice Changkyun looking over at you, or the way his face softened. His fingers tightened around the chopsticks and he leaned back against the cushion.

“What’s that one about?” He nodded towards one of the movies that was in the watch again section.

You raised an eyebrow, scrolling over to it. “Please don’t tell me that you’ve never seen Love Actually?”

“If I did, would I have asked what it’s about?”

Unable to stop yourself, an undignified sound escaped you as you wildly gestured with the remote. “How? It’s like the sweetest romance, Christmas movie ever. They play it every year. It even has Liam Neeson, the man promising to find and kill everyone, as a sweet dad who doesn’t kill anyone! That alone is a true Christmas miracle by itself.”

The thought of him being with someone else dissipated at the sound of his laughter. Even caught up in the excitement of this particular movie, you couldn’t stop the smile that grew. No matter what, even in real life or over video, you always found yourself grinning the second he laughed or smiled. He was without a doubt contagious, in the best way possible.

“What are you waiting for?” He said, gesturing towards the screen with the chopsticks, shoulders relaxing at the sight of your smile and apparent joy for the film. One that he had in fact, seen a few times over the years. “Press play.”

There was no hesitation. You were determined to culture him in what you deemed to be a classic in romance films. So, as you comfortably settled in, belly growing full of warm and delicious food, you once again missed Changkyun’s wide smile. It was the kind of grin that no matter what he did, or how serious he tried to be, simply wouldn’t go away.

The empty dinner plates sat long forgotten about on the coffee table as another movie played, this one involving an action pack fight scene with aliens in New York City. Hours had passed since Changkyun arrived at your door, and despite it growing late and Valentine’s Day was nearing its end, his polished shoes were unlaced and tossed on the floor. A wine bottle had been opened up, and you sat much closer to him to share a blanket with him. You were blaming it on the wine for being so bold because when he stretched an arm on the back of the couch, you didn’t think twice about gently leaning your head against it.

You couldn’t even really blame it on the wine. It was the first glass for both of you, and you were a slow drinker, so you were as sober as a newborn lamb at the moment.

It was just like when the two of you would video chat with the same movie on, but so much better. Having him here, you were noticing the smallest things that you’d miss when on the phone. At the base of his neck was a small mole that you never realized he had, or that he was wearing two thin silver chains – a pair that, now that you thought about it, he never went without. Behind you, he’d occasionally rub his fingers together and the metal of his bracelet would lightly clink against itself. With the few glances that you stole, his attention was solely on the movie and his jaw appeared to be pressed together.

Feeling a sudden weight, you turned to see him settling his arm around your shoulders. His wrist was now hanging over your arm, and it took all your willpower to not reach up with a free hand to lace your fingers loosely with his. When you glanced back up at him, he was in mid sip of his wine, throat bobbing with each swallow.

Shit. This was not helping the butterflies that seemed to have multiplied since his arrival.

Changkyun raised an eyebrow when he lowered his glass, softly humming in question, but you only shook your head and focused back on the movie. Except, now you were hyper aware that he was looking at you this time.

“What’s wrong?” He murmured, his thumb and fingers lightly rubbing against your arm.

That was another thing. His voice was deep. In the calls, the phone occasionally cracked and had made it seem lighter, but it appeared to be just the opposite. He was blessed with a voice that was able to drop lower than a bass, sending your insides to mush when he spoke. It was the type of voice that was destined to recite poetry and old sonnets, to hold three in the morning conversations that went wherever and everywhere. When he called your name, it never failed to send tingles running the length of your body. It was his voice, and you knew that you’d never grow tired of hearing him talk.

“Nothing. I was just thinking,” you said, leaning your head back, his arm comfortable and warm as you looked up at the ceiling, trying to avoid his gaze for a few seconds.

His fingers didn’t stop. The gentle caress, a small reassurance that he was in fact here and this wasn’t your imagination, made it harder to stay where you sat instead of curling into his side like you wanted.

“Thinking about what?”

Letting out a breathless scoff, you tilted your head towards him. Changkyun was a sight to see and you knew that if this was the only time you got to spend with him in person, you were never going to forget this moment.

Your smile softened. “That you’re actually here, after all these months of texts and video calls. You actually came here, and you’re real.”

“Did you think I was a robot or something?” Changkyun teased, but his fingers stopped moving, and that lock of hair fell back into his eyes again.

“Well, you did accidentally call me instead of Jooheon and last time I checked, we look nothing alike.” There was no thinking as you reached up and mimicked his movements to push that damn lock back, feeling how soft his hair was. It brought you a little bit closer to him and in that second, the world suddenly felt like it was no longer moving when you glanced down at his lips. Those pink lips that you wondered and dreamt about night after night, too curious for your own good on what it would be like to kiss him. Now was your chance to find out, especially when he didn’t lean back and appeared to be getting closer.

“Cookies?” You suddenly asked, leaning back to see his eyebrows start to pull together in confusion. Heart racing, you set your wine glass on the coffee table and walked around the couch to step into the kitchen. With only your back to him, you quietly let out a shaky breath. “I know I have some for us to munch on…”

Opening up a cabinet, you stretched on to your toes to search for the package of cookies that you knew were in there, mentally slapping yourself at having done that. He hadn’t backed away, hadn’t tried to stop you, in fact, if you allowed yourself to believe it, you would have recalled that he had started to lean in when you randomly brought up cookies. As much as you wanted to, the last thing you wanted was to lose your friendship.

You were pushing aside a box of crackers when his hand captured your wrist, halting your search. It felt like your heart was about to leap out of its cage when his fingers gently wrapped around your hand, and when his palm settled on a hip, it was equally as comforting as it lit a spark inside you. There was nothing you wanted to do more than to melt into his embrace.

“Sweetheart, do you really think I’m here to just hang out?” He asked, his voice low as he spoke into your ear, his body stepping closer to yours.

“You’re…you’re not?” You weakly asked, nervous because you didn’t want this all to be a joke.

The idea of this being a one night only thing thanks to the holiday left an ache in your bones. You wanted more nights like this with him, wanted to hear him call out your name with that gentle smile of his over and over again. Dammit, you wanted to wake up and have the blankets be stifling hot but not care as you crawled over to his side of the bed, searching for morning cuddles because fuck the person who decided that the workday would start at eight in the morning. The only person you wanted to spend this quarantine with, to be able to touch, to be worried and even scared about all this with, was Changkyun.

Changkyun’s breath hit the back of your neck as he softly chuckled, sending a shiver down your spine. “God, I thought I was being obvious. Let me try this differently.”

Still holding on to your wrist, he turned you around and once you were facing him, let go of your hand to step closer until your back was against the counter. With each breath your chest brushed against his, and when he pushed the hair that had fallen in your face behind your ear, fingers brushing against your cheek, you almost forgot to breathe.

“I know you’ve always had a pretty crappy Valentine’s day,” Changkyun softly spoke. His gaze was steady with yours, and even though he was being serious, there was a softness to his features that had the corner of his mouth curling upwards. “And I thought that the best way to keep that from repeating this year, would be if you spent it with someone, who loves you.”

Who loves…oh.

It suddenly all made sense. Why he didn’t want to say what he was doing to celebrate, him calling you pretty, the food and flowers, the coaxing touches, he could have rented a billboard and put up a neon flashing sign and you probably still would have been blind.

“Changkyun,” you whispered, reaching up to cup his cheek.

He softly smiled as he closed the remaining space between you to rest his forehead against yours, his palms sliding along your body until he had you wrapped in a hug. “There you go, now you get it.”

Giggling, you rolled your eyes out of habit. It was like him to be a smart ass during a moment like this. With that being said, the butterflies fluttered their way up to your heart, and all the daydreams that you entertained and thought nothing would come of them, now had the possibility of becoming reality.

“I love you too,” you said, running your thumb along his cheek as you watched his smile widen.

There was no hesitation, or smart ass comments this time. Instead, when his lips met yours in a kiss, your heart stopped racing. The butterflies finally calmed down and the world around you went out of focus as your fingers slid through his hair. His lips were soft, and thanks to the red wine, there was a lingering tangy sweetness that reminded you of raspberries. You found yourself becoming addicted to his taste, the kisses melting together until you lost track of how long the two of you stood there, content with doing nothing but being wrapped up in each other’s embrace.

A clock chimed out in the apartment, breaking the kiss which only served to make you pout at the loss of his lips. The gesture didn’t go unnoticed by Changkyun, who smirked before leaning down to give one more kiss, which quickly turned into two, then three.

“Don’t you have work in the morning?” He murmured, resting his forehead once more against yours.

“You trying to kiss and dash?”

His fingers gently pressed into your sides and you squirmed at his touch, giggling at his antics. However, he leaned his head back and sighed. “Like hell I’d do that. But you usually wake up earlier for work, and trust me, I’ll end up keeping you awake if I stay the night.”

There was no doubt about that, and to be truthful, you’d have no issue if that was the case. He was right, but as ideas turned in your mind, you shrugged. “You can’t go out driving though,” you said softly. “You were drinking.”

Changkyun frowned, head tilting as he removed a hand from your back to run through his hair. “Not even a whole glass.”

You raised an eyebrow. It took him having to say he loved you for you to understand how he felt about you despite his dine and wine attempt, and here he was, completely missing what you were suggesting. Either you were absolutely perfect for each other, or equally dense.

“Well, we also broke quarantine,” you said slowly, slipping a finger through his belt loop at the same time to bring him closer. “Isn’t the recommendation to stay at home for what, at least three days?”

He started to tilt his head, mouth opening to question what you were saying until he saw the smile growing on your face. Closing his eyes, he pressed his lips together before looking back at you.

“That was horrible,” Changkyun said. He slipped his arms back around you, pulling you away from the counter. His grin said otherwise. “At least I tried being romantic.”

“Well, I mean, if you really want to go back to your place by yourself…”

He didn’t let you say another word, his lips reclaiming yours again, because there was absolutely nothing that felt better than kissing you after months of dreaming what it would be like.

“Don’t go,” you softly murmured against his lips. “Not when you just got here.”

Maybe it was selfish. But you didn’t want to be alone again. Not when he had gone through so much trouble to make this night special, not when you finally knew that he felt the same way about you. After almost a year of staying inside the apartment whenever you could, of going without hugs or get togethers, being able to touch and kiss Changkyun felt like you were relearning what those were all over again. All you wanted was a few days with him.

Changkyun hummed, his arms tightening around you. “Sweetheart, I wasn’t planning on going anywhere,” he said, gazing down at you as if he had considered the same thing.

The clock that had rang out to announce the hour of a new day and that Valentine’s day was over, continued to quietly tick in the other room. The Earth continued to spin, and outside, the world was exactly how it had been this morning, full of fear, what ifs, and the unknown of a pandemic that didn’t seem to be going anywhere any time soon.

But inside that small apartment, wrapped in Changkyun’s arms, giggles and laughter filled the walls when he pulled you to the middle of the kitchen and spun you around for a late-night dance. It might not be the thing that changes the world, but for the first time, in a long time, hope began to blossom alongside the butterflies in your stomach. The memories of past Valentine’s days melted away at his kiss, until only the memory of him at your door remained.

Even when it hadn’t felt like it, love and hope had always been there. And now it was here promising lovelier days to come.

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nightshadedawn · 4 years ago

Text

Persona 5 Royal Playthrough pt3

I ended up going through two Palaces before I could update y’all. Oh well.

...Yeah, no, quit calling me Miss Special Snowflake's boyfriend. It's not happening.

Ryuji, Morgana, and Yusuke having a conversation in the laundromat: "It's like he's our mom," says Ryuji... the mom friend.

Every time Morgana is like "I have to turn into a human so no one else can have Lady Ann!" then expects no one else to hear him makes me laugh. Like, bitch, no.

I have the restaurant in my Thieves Den 'cause I like it. Yusuke, Ryuji, and Morgana are there. They're so precious.

I got a three in a row Tycoon on cutthroat!!!

Ryuji and Ann just keep going "Shoulda figured" and other versions of the statement every time I win.

Ann just rejected Morgana's feelings HARD. I am happy.

Ryuji is too good, honestly. Why would anyone not like him? He's... He's always trying to build the team up, make them proud of themselves and what they've done. I will admit that he has his moments of being not a great human, but they're teenagers who were given absurd powers, so honestly, can you blame them?

I didn't know darts was an actual minigame! There's so many minigames. I'm so happy.

I don't like Akechi. I don't know why some people do. Like, his death scene was a bit... too late for a redemption for me, right after he tried to kill Joker, several times. His pain is understandable, but still... I can't.

Their "two sides of the same coin" also doesn't seem particularly fair. It's totally uneven in everything but color schemes.

Guys, GUYS, please, PLEASE decide whether you're going to react to my teasing or not.

"We don't have to deal with them directly," Ryuji says joyfully about the mafia. Oh you sweet, sweet, innocent child, if only you knew what I do.

I literally can't play this game around anyone else because I tend to yell "BABY!" to Ryuji, Ann, and Yusuke and "BITCH" or "FUCKER" to... a rather long list of villains in this game... and Makoto.

I can literally feel Yusuke's anxiety about his painting when you take him to Leblanc to see Sayuri.

How can you say Yusuke isn't gay when he says everything I do is beautiful?

I love Ryuji's 9th social link. It's LITERALLY written like a confession scene. This also means I kinda hate it because... I can't date him.

Also... PRETTY BOY RYUJI PRETTY BOY RYUJI PRETTY BOY RYUJI

I actually kinda thought that the new scene for Ryuji being a crossdresser is kinda funny??? Is this bad??? I wanna see him in a dress, tho. I gotta agree, he'd be a natural. Not the like, painfully obviously not taking it seriously from the dancing game, though.

Though I do think it's valid that he freaks out when two strange adults come up to him and try to take him somewhere, especially in a place known for being shady, and at night.

...When Ryuji complains about it, I do feel bad about ditching him. Then again, I blame the cat.

Ryuji may be my ideal type on paper, but I'm also highly attracted to Yusuke and this is so totally unfair.

*softly chanting* butlers butlers butlers butlers

Don't mind me just... *makes meticulous plot to avoid having Makoto join the team that i may or may not write a fanfic about*

Makoto is one dumbass bitch. Like, honestly, there's nothing she does that's in any way remotely smart.

...I thought I'd just skip Makoto's scenes until she became relevant, but here I am, still skipping her scenes. Does that mean she’s still irreleveant?

"Witch" I suggest, and Makoto complains! "Would you prefer "Bitch"? I can use that too.

I put Yusuke on the team in the middle of the palace through settings, replacing Morgana, who had been standing right behind me. Which made Yusuke stand right behind me. It looked like he was holding onto my waist and standing uncomfortably close. Bro, babe, I love you, but not in front of my boyfriend and girlfriend!

Just accept the compliment, guys, I'm not going to compliment Queen.

...Opening chests with Ann or Ryuji is just so sweet because they're so affectionate and touchy feely. Especially Ryuji.

Math. Fucking. Sucks. I should not have to use math in a game. I hate this. Obviously it's the Palace Makoto comes in that this happened.

Well, I finished the Palace in a day. I love the feeling. But it was getting close there. Joker and Yusuke were down to no spells...

...Yoshizawa hasn't showed up yet. When is she getting shoehorned in?

WHY IS THE VELVET ROOM RED!?

My very first playthrough I didn't execute a single execution except for the first one we have to do. It really screwed me over my second playthrough...

...I broke the electric chair. That's certainly something that happened.

147 games of Tycoon later and I've only been a beggar 31 times in total, versus the pure thirty wins in just Cutthroat.

They're in their summer uniforms and it makes make miss warmer weather already. It's fucking snowing outside. Grrrr.

Beat Kaneshiro! ...Wasn't a fan of his new boss battle. I'm even playing on safe mode! But whatever.

Makoto is a DISASTER at Tycoon. She exclusively got beggar all three times I played with her!

...RYUJI YOU CAN'T SAY SHIT LIKE THAT AND NOT LET ME DATE YOU.

Ann, sweeties, baby, you're doing so well.

She confessed to me, then in the call afterwards it was basically insinuated I proposed... WHICH IS LIKE FUCK YEAH 'CAUSE SHE ACCEPTED IT.

It makes me think of the future conversation where they're talking about marriage.

Anyway, if you haven't noticed, l love Ann.

My next playthrough I'm not gong to date her, though. I'm a completionist and I want ALL of the possible awards. But... I refuse to cheat on Ann. So I'll date everyone else then just hang with Ryuji... despite how cringy some of the date things are.

...If Akechi wasn't, you know EVIL and tried to KILL ME, SEVERAL TIMES, I might, MIGHT, like him. But in truth, I think that's really just the Persona 5: Revival talking. We get... into some stuff during that.

I know that either Atlus or the translators know EXACTLY what goes on in the Persona fandom because otherwise "He's too pretty to be wrong" would not be an option when talking to the newspaper girl about Akechi. I have to agree with her that his looks aren't really, you know, awesome enough for that.

Also, I read it as "He's too petty to be wrong" at first and I think that's an accurate sum of his character.

YO AKECHI-FUCK I HAVE NO NEED TO SEE YOUR ASS LIKE THAT WHEN I HAVE BOTH A BF AND AND GF.

...fucker fucking giving me shit about my fake glasses...

If you COULD date the boy out of mod, Akechi would definitely be the one they were pushing you to date. Like Makoto. Or Yoshizawa.

But hey, at least I get to not be nice to him.

I remember seeing this picture where Ann, Ryuji, and Joker kept going to the movies together and seeing 3D movies, and Joker couldn't wear the 3D glasses properly because of his own. I keep imagining that picture during this event with Caroline and Justine.

You know what? Some people call Joker a loli lover because of them, but nope! He's just adopted two more siblings. That is my stance on it.

FUcking

Fucker

WHAT THE FRRRRRRRR

FUCK YOU ATULS OR TRANSLATORS OR WHATEVER

APHRODITE AND MARS ARE FROM TWO DIFFERENT MYTHOS. Aphrodite is GREEK, Mars is ROMAN. Their reversed are VENUS and ARES. USE ONE OR THE OTHER PEOPLE.

I get very pissed about this, and it's worse with Hades.

7/4 is the day I am screaming at, if you were wondering.

My dad asked me if the other students think Joker's stupid because every time I answer a question right they get all surprised.

I don't really like Makoto, as I'm sure you've noticed, but she was super nice about Ryuji's special move idea. And that put her ahead of Akechi in my book.

TESTS ARE NERVE WRACKING EVEN WHEN THEY'RE FICTIONAL

Yusuke and Ryuji are good boys, the best boys. And they're so awesome about their special move.

AND RYUJI OFFERED MONEY FOR YUSUKE'S FOOD. And implied that he did it before???? Ryuji, you best boy.

This boys' outing DOES make me happy, though. Like, insanely happy. Dunno why.

Maybe because Joker gets to be so flipping cheesy.

...fuck you, Yoshizawa.

HONESTLY WHAT THE EVER LOVING--- Grr. Too many choices while with her. Too many. OOC Joker when with her. 0/10.

I LOVE THE FESTIVAL PHOTO

And you know, it's really hard to choose between Lala-chan and Ann, but... GONNA TAKE ANN ON A DATE

Got her some flowers. Lets see if we can give them to her this time!

"Such a good FRIEND." Babe, we're DATING. For like, TWO WEEKS NOW.

AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO GIVE HER FLOWERS

Ann called Yusuke a pretty boy, but then she's missing out on the REAL pretty boy, Pretty Boy Ryuji.

Ryuji, why're you so worried about other girls when you've got ME?

"I like the shade." "What are you, moss!?" Oh, admit it, Ryuji, I'm growing on you.

Cargona. Snrk. Gods, I love you, Ryuji.

Dome town with Ryuji! "Isn't it all couples?" That's the point!

I COULD GIVE RYUJI THE ROSES!?

Sadly, I bought those for Ann. Ryuji, you get the noodles.

AND HE FUCKING LOVED IT.

"It feels like I really captured Ryuji's heart!" FUCK YEAH I DID

Gonna give Yusuke the bracelet when I get the chance.

Why is everyone color coded in the chat room? Kawakami, Akechi, Mishima, and the reporter are all ORANGE. What's the point? Well, Akechi's more of a golden orange, but close enough.

While Mishima is not my first choice for a date, he's definitely not my last.

...But the boy really needs some fucking sleep. He's not drawn with the bags under his eyes, but I can see them!

It's not fair that they give Akechi a kicked puppy sprite. I'm... goddamnit, they're trying to make me not hate him.

When Makoto doesn't know something, I'm brought great joy.

NO DAD MAKOTO IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND ANN IS AND SHE IS LITERALLY R I G H T T H E R E

First day in Futaba's Palace! I've gotta say, this is my second favorite palace. Kamoshida, Futaba, Madarame, Sae, Okumura, Shido, Kaneshiro, Holy Grail. In that order. I HATE Kaneshiro's place and dealing with the Holy Grail. But whatevs, man. I love this game. (Vanilla, at least, this one is still on the fence)

I found out a cool little thing. On the uphill sand slopes in the town (don't know about anywhere else) if you're running and turn back quickly, Joker will do a little animation to steady himself. It was cool and made it seem, I dunno, more human? Anyway, while I was admiring this, Ryuji and Yusuke just stood at the top of the slope and Ann followed me while I was running. Best girlfriend ever.

Kin-Ki is looking pretty kin-ky if you know what I'm sayin'

Please don't murder me because I do terrible puns.

*we fall through the trap door* *Ryuji starts screaming* Same, baby, same.

...Makoto is seriously annoying. Like, she's got no business acting as familiar with Futaba's situation. The one who WOULD be the most familiar is Yusuke, and I'm glad he recognizes that. It's not the exact same, none of their stories are after all, but I feel like those two get each other better than even Ryuji and Joker understand each other.

Yusuke and Ryuji's special attack is THE BEST

Ryuji and Joker getting up close and personal in the shadows. All those fanfics coming true, man.

I thought Futaba was sloth, not wrath? Why are her Will Seeds called Wrath?

Beat it in one day! It's so satisfying to watch all those achievements when I leave the palace.

You know, I'm thinking of wearing the Christmas outfits for the final battle. Just to be kinda funny.

Spending a relaxing day with Yusuke after going through Futaba's Palace... kinda want to take him to the bathhouse to check out that new scene, but I also REALLY wanna feed the boy... gonna feed the boy.

Apparently I can only make 'decent curry.' Which is fine. Because "I" can't make curry at all. Joker, you've done much better than I.

THE DATE CHANGE SCREEN HAD A RAINBOW AND RYUJI WAS COMING OVER ON THE SAME DAY FUCK YEAH MY BISEXUAL BABY

...Broooooo, the way you talk about your manga is how I talk right before I start shipping.

Took him to the bathhouse, 'cause I don't gotta worry about Mama Sakamoto feeding him.

...Can I take Ann to the bathhouse?

Asked Ryuji to move in. He was all up for the idea until he remembered that I live in an attic.

I'm Charismatic now!

...I was all hoping Ann would stop by but then Akechi asked me out. Laaaaaaaame.

Ryuji's smile is so fucking cute.

...I say we just be honest, and everyone's so fucking stupid about it until Makoto explains it. This pisses me off. They're not that dumb... At least, they weren't until Makoto showed up.

Futaba's hiding in the closet. ...I've spent too many weeks making jokes about closets to not have a joke about it.

Really, Yusuke? You see those books and think she can't understand?

...Wait, that sassy tone of voice... You were TRYING to pull a reaction of her. I knew I shipped those two for a reason. OTP and BroTP. Doesn't matter, they're both awesome.

I love you Ann, but I don't think your situations were the same at all. It's not like both are valid and bad, but... different.

Joker is SO fast compared to the others, especially when he's speeding.

What the...

Holy fuck...

JOKER IS TOO EFFING COOL

THAT MOVE TO GET FROM THE ENTRANCE TO TO TREASURE DOOR? Awesome!

Damn, Joker has my heart too.

I kinda wish we could see Futaba's costumes in her Persona. That would be pretty neat.

The moment right before Wakaba appears is so aesthetically pleasing.

...Futaba being happy is almost enough for me to accept Maruki's offer, and I haven't gotten there yet.

Ryuji and Ann keep smacking each other out of their ailments. Like, you guys just love each other so much! It's awesome.

Joker has lackluster responses to Wakaba... I'm hoping that isn't one of those "Answer these wrong and you break her!" things... Not that I think I was, but still.

I liked Futaba's new animation for when she defied her mother.

I wish the anime looked more the cutscenes. I'm trying to rewatch the anime so I can pinpoint specific moments for future editing purposes, but it's kinda painful.

1- This is the SECOND TIME you've landed on Yusuke while running from trouble.

2- YUSUKE LET GO OF MY GIRL

No Makoto, I don't want to go see Futaba with you! I can go see her myself.

So, I like Takemi's new voice with her lines during this scene.

Sure, she collapses every so often and sleeps for a while. Stays like that for a few days. Sorry that I put her into a coma for a month, Boss...

SHE LOOKS SO CUTE WITHOUT GLASSES

Guys, we have a month. Stop worrying.

THE TWINS ARE SO CUTE WHILE HANGING ONTO THE BENCH PRESS

Damn, Joker's dying to the amusement of two little girls.

I'm kinda disappointed I didn't get results for all that training. But I liked the scene.

Yusuke just casually be lugging bigass paintings around.

Taking the girls to the church may have been one of the funnier moments. These cement them as Joker's little sisters. With Futaba. Damn, Joker, you got no brothers.

Yusuke promises to come by every day and we can tell him to take his clothes off. ATLUS, you have some EXPLAINING to DO.

..And Yusuke took it and ran with it. My sweet summer child, I don't think I could handle you in as little as possible on the day to day.

"The heat induced delirium made me think outside the box." Same.

Guts takes sooooooooooooo long to level up.

"Punish me more" he says, as if Takemi won't do it.

"Good god. Well, none of my medicine can cure THAT." AT LEAST WE'RE ALL ON THE SAME PAGE

BATHHOUSE WITH YUSUKE

Awe, he had fun. :)

#Persona 5 #akira kusuru #shuann #pegoryu #pegoryuann #persona 5 royal #yusuke kitagawa #ann takamaki #Ryuji Sakamoto #Pretty Boy Ryuji

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sword-brainrot · 3 years ago

Note

Oh, um! May I request a matchup? I know these can be draining to do so feel free to skip me if you want!!

So, um hi! Im a 19 yo translation student! Everyone uses she/her when talking to me, but you can use whatever you like, I dont mind pronouns! Im really shy and kinda anxious when talking to people, but I'm completely see-through ;; cant tell a lie to save my life haha Im super curious abt practically anything and I love to learn new things! When I have to get work done, I make sure it looks shiny and perfect! (even tough I procastinate on it until there's almost no time left,,,,) I prefer indoors because loud sounds make me somewhat panicky??;;;; and in my free time I play games, learn useless stuff and sleep... y'know, the usual ^^;

As for what I'd like in a parter.... I want someone who cares about me ;; I know it may be a bit too much but I guess I can dream right? :') As for myself,,,, idk id be a completely mess ;; Im good at listening I think! but when it comes to affection Im at a loss and I just get embarrassed,,,, I blush at everything and when Im put in a spot I try to laugh it off ;;

Um, also... Im sure you already noticed but I have some self issues so you may want to take this into consideration???? maybe???? Im sorry I had to bring this up;;; i tought it could help you get a better picture of myself haha???? uuu;; (um also i apologize for this huge wall of text, i know its all over the place.... dont know how to organize it;;;;)

Oh, and I don't care about sword types nor I have a preference! I love all the slashy boys equally ♡

Thank you for taking the time to read this, I really appreciate it 💖💖

Oh I would never skip your request! If I ever get drained, I would take a small break. I wanna do your requests dear! Feel free to request as much as you want, I have a blast whenever I can write and make someone smile because of it. Don't worry about bothering me or anything, seeing requests always makes me smile and excited to write 💖🌺

I Match You With...

🌸 Ishikirimaru 🌸

♡ Ishikirimaru is a very calm and friendly guy, he would understand very well how scary social interaction can be for some people. He would never push you too far and make sure he knows your limits. He would offer you to have tea with him or help him clean just so you both can bond together and let you know what he does want to be around you. He doesn't mind if you don't talk much because you are shy! Ishikirimaru doesn't talk too much in general but doesn't mind starting the conversation and having a short discussion about things that may interest you or your thoughts on things.

♡ Don't worry about ever making him angry or annoyed, it is very hard to do that. He is very easy going and cares a lot about other people. The only way he would ever get actually angry at you is if you say something insensitive about how people's lives in war don't matter or something along those lines. He was a sword kept in a temple that often got prayed to for healing the warriors who came back from battle with deadly wounds. That is the only thing that would actually get under his skin. He cares a lot about the people around him and even the people he doesn't know, he prays for all of their well beings. Even yours. He cares about you a lot as well and will tell you often that you matter to everyone. He is aware that you would never say something to upset him on purpose. As long as the two of you talk it out and apologize to each other, he will forget it even happened. He wouldn't let one slip of the tongue to ruin the relationship.

♡ He tries hard to make sure he never upsets anyone and thinks over his words carefully, but even he makes mistakes and words don't come out how they planned. He will make the most effort to apologize and make sure his words didn't hurt you badly. If they did, he would spend hours on end talking it out and making sure you know that he would never mean anything that would hurt you. He cares about you a lot and your smile is his favorite.

♡ Ishikirimaru might be a little pushy when you talk badly about yourself. He loves everything about you and it hurts him when you think you are lesser than everyone. He will often try to stop you before you go too far with talking down upon yourself and give you plenty of compliments, even if they embarrass you. He wants you to know that you are deserving of love and that you are much better than you give yourself credit for. You have your own talents and people cherish you for being you. They want you in their life because you are you.

♡ "Aruji, I haven't been human long but I understand that being human is a complicated task. The mind can be a cruel one and the deadliest thing to our souls. My words may not mean much but please trust me when I say that you like you for you. You will see things you do not like about yourself because you are stuck with yourself constantly so you will pick up things that others will not. We are all hard on ourselves. Life is even worse on us. So take a deep breath and let yourself receive a little kindness. You deserve it. You give out so much to everyone so you need to know that it is okay to love things about yourself and be proud of who you are. You will make mistakes and not everyone will be your friend but that is okay, because you are human and you have your own life. Surround yourself with people that will love and appreciate you for who you are now. I love and appreciate you for who you are, aruji. So.. Don't be so hard on yourself, alright? It hurts my fragile heart when I see you beat yourself up for small mistakes. It's okay to stumble at times, just get up again... okay? I'll lend you my hand as well."

♡ As you can tell, Ishikirimaru is a very good listener. His whole life as a sword was to listen to those of the pained and give guidance. Even if he couldn't exactly do that in his sword form, he can do that now! He will listen to everything you have to say. Don't be shy to ramble to him. He will give you a happy smile as he listens. Tell him about the things that make you happy, what make you angry, what makes you laugh, and what makes you sad. Ishikirimaru will be right by your side, offering tea and a shoulder if you need it. You aren't alone and he will make sure you know that you don't have to face these thoughts alone.

♡ Just as how you are see through and can't lie, Ishikirimaru has a similar issue. He has a very hard time ever lying and chooses to never lie. The only time he will lie is if it is to protect others. He will often put himself in the painful position in missions so others don't have to face the hardship. He tries to not do it often because he knows that people care about him and he doesn't have to face things alone, but he would rather not see anyone sad if he can help it!

♡ He finds your embarrassed face the cutest thing in the world. Don't be scared to tell him to stop if the compliments become too much for you to handle! He will laugh it off and apologize for going too far with his comments. As stated above, he doesn't lie. So just know that every compliment he gives you is a very sincere comment that he means with his whole heart. Ishikirimaru doesn't need much affection, as long as you show that you simply care about him, he is happy. He would like to hold your hand from time to time but otherwise, he wouldn't force you to do anything you don't wish to do. Go at your own pace in the relationship, he won't rush you!

♡ Ishikirimaru will tell you anything you wish to learn! He might not have a library of knowledge of the past due to being stuck in a shrine for most of his life but he had also studied and learned about the history he came from. If you take an interest in his prayers and religion, he would gladly tell you all the tales he is aware of and teach you the cleansing sermon he often does to give positive spiritual energy. It is something that brings him peace of mind and makes him happy to talk about, so if you are willing to learn about what makes him who he is today and what makes him happy, he would be overjoyed to share all his knowledge to you.

♡ He understands very well the appeal of getting work done to the best of your ability and making it look the best you can. He wouldn't label himself a perfectionist but he does want to do the best he can. Often with cleaning. You will often see him stuck in a room all day because he wants to make sure it is spotless before he comes out and continues work else where. Though... by the time he is done... It is dinner time. Perhaps the two of you could work together and get work done to the point you are both happy with it.

♡ Ishikirimaru is also someone who happens to stay inside for the most part. The only time he goes outside would be to enjoy tea in the sun or if he has to work the field/horse keeping. Ishikirimaru is a very soft spoken and gentle man so you don't have to worry about him every raising his voice and scaring you. If there is ever a loud noise, whether it is other swords or a storm outside, he will gently hold your hand and try to calm you down. He will assure you that it's okay to not like loud noises but he will make sure that nothing hurts you. He will even try to lead you away to somewhere that may be a little more quiet. Giving you a distraction to get your mind off the noise. He wants nothing more than you to feel comfortable and safe.

♡ Depending on the game, he may want to play with you! He tends to like card games even though he is very easy to read and often loses. He tends to laugh about it after when he realizes that he was accidentally showing his hand every time he set down his cards to get a sip of tea. If it's video games, he would prefer to just watch you play and talk to you while you enjoy the game. He isn't the biggest fan but still enjoys to watch! Ishikirimaru is a pretty good teacher! So if you wish to study with him, he would be flattered that you wished to study with him out of everyone. He is very understanding that some material is hard to memorize out of no where. He would just softly correct you and tell you to work on it a little more. He rewards you with sweets every time you do really well on any test he gives you to test how much you remember.

♡ Ishikirimaru would be the most understanding and gentle partner. He wants nothing more than you being comfortable and happy. He would work hard on you slowly forgiving yourself when you make a mistake and love yourself a little more. He would never give up on you and be there if you ever needed.

#Matchups #Touken Ranbu #Touken Danshi #Tourabu #Touken Ranbu Headcanons #Touken Ranbu Imagines #Touken Ranbu x Reader #TKRB #TKRB Headcanons #TKRB Imagines #TKRB x Reader #Ishikirimaru #Ishikirimaru x Reader

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aspoonofsugar · 4 years ago

Note

Warning? What Winter is an implied threat in fact is the second he receives, do you know that there is a possibility that Ironwood and Watts are alive? as Ironwood has a huge fan base and advocates and most prefer Watts as a villain than Cinder mainly because of his talk of why you suck that he gave to Cinder. Also Watts has the excuse that he never unlocked his appearance and they already played that trick on Jaune.

"Watts's wishes lead to her death and the same could happen to Cinder if she doesn't stop in time." And matters? In your theory of the principles of alchemy you establish your belief that Cinder will die in the end. Not stopping "in time" a minor distinction. Everything for her translates into following an impossible dream but dreaming of her to the bitter end or just redeeming herself to live on borrowed time.

Hello anons,

these two asks can be answered together for two reasons.

1) They both refer to this meta.

2) The answers to these two asks all lie in the idea that you can talk about a story from different perspectives.

In particular, these two asks touch at least 4 different ways to look at a narrative and mix them all together.

So, I’ll answer bit by bit.

Warning? What Winter is an implied threat in fact is the second he receives,

I used the term “warning” to convey the idea that Winter’s lines are used not only in-universe to express Winter’s feelings (she is calling Ironwood out and swearing revenge on Cinder), but to make a specific point.

As I said in the meta Cinder and Ironwood are foils and their foiling is conveyed through their actions, but also through specific lines said in key moments or by key characters, so that the viewers can pick up on their juxtaposition.

Ironwood: I will sacrifice... whatever it takes... to stop her.

Cinder: And take... what is mine.

The one above is another example. Ironwood and Cinder say these lines respectively in Gravity and Ultimatum while they are confronting Watts. The two scenes are clear parallels, but in one scene you have Ironwood say he will sacrifice everything, while in the other Cinder talks about taking what is hers. We are meant to pick up on the juxtaposition.

The same thing can be said about Winter’s lines because Winter is either willingly or unwillingly pointing out the mistakes in Ironwood and Cinder’s logics.

On one hand Ironwood says he’ll sacrifice everything because he feels entitled to do so. The implication is that he sees everything as his, even what is not (others’ lives).

On the other hand Cinder wants everything because she feels she must receive payback from the world. She too feels entitled, but for a different reason than Ironwood.

Winter highlights Ironwood’s selfishness and points out how Cinder will receive a pay-back, not a prize though, but a punishment (in narrative terms).

Of course Winter has no idea she is in a narrative. We know though and we can read her lines in two ways.

The first one is from a character perspective. Why Winter says does things in-universe.

The second one is from an analytical pov. What those lines mean for the themes and for the narrative as a whole.

You are referencing the first, while in the analysis I am using the second.

do you know that there is a possibility that Ironwood and Watts are alive? as Ironwood has a huge fan base and advocates and most prefer Watts as a villain than Cinder mainly because of his talk of why you suck that he gave to Cinder. Also Watts has the excuse that he never unlocked his appearance and they already played that trick on Jaune.

Watts and Ironwood being still alive or not does not change the sense of my meta. They have still been defeated and tricked by Cinder hence their thematic meaning in the volume does not change.

Moreover, once again I am using an analytical perspective there. An analysis is meant to comment on the story itself and to interpret it. Of course this interpretation might change as the story goes on and new information comes in. Still, a volume is meant to be a unit and to have some kind of thematic resolution, even if this resolution can be subverted or made deeper in the following installments.

Anyway, when it comes to Ironwood and Watts surviving I do not think it is the case. You are discussing the story through a fandom perspective. However, so far CRWBY has not been scared about killing off even popular characters.

Moreover, so far the “fake” deaths have always been pretty clear. It was clear that in volume 3 both Ozpin and Penny’s deaths were temporary and that they would have come back.

Similarly, all the characters who fall this past volume are very clearly alive.

Finally, even Cinder falling in volume 5 was clearly not the end of her story. This is because Cinder is a key character and she will be so until the end.

Which leads us to the idea Watts would be a better villain than her, The answer here is very clearly...no. Cinder is waaaaaay deeper as a character than Watts.

Watts is a character clearly linked to Atlas (just like Ironwood) and he has been pivotal in the past volumes because his skills are especially useful in such a setting. Other than this, he is a character clearly there to serve Cinder’s arc and not vice versa.

In general, all the members of team WTCH with the exception of Cinder herself are in the story as foils of our original villain trio:

Cinder, Emerald and Mercury are deeper and more complex characters than Watts, Hazel and Tyrian. This does not mean W, H and T are bad characters. I actually like all of them, but their role in the narrative is meant to be less important than the other three.

It is not by chance that Hazel and Watts both die in situations linked to respectively Emerald and Cinder. I guess Tyrian’s death will have something to do with Mercury’s story. Or maybe their foiling will play out differently. Anyway, they are clearly linked.

This is also why comparing Watts to Jaune does not really work. Jaune is a protagonist, while Watts is a secondary villain. Jaune discovering his semblance is not a trick, but a part of his character arc, while Watts does not even have an arc. He is more similar to Torchwick aka another character who dies without discovering his semblance.

What I wrote in the meta is an analysis, while me thinking Cinder will have a redemptive death is a theory. An analysis for me is about interpreting the past, while a theory is a guess about the future. A person might agree with the analysis, but disagree with the theory or vice versa... hence the two things are not necessarily linked.

If you are asking how I see the two things coming together in my mind, then the answer is that I think Cinder won’t stop herself in time. Or to better say, it is that this volume was her chance not to stop herself, but at least to slow down a little. However, she has not taken it.

I think she will receive pretty harsh consequences for what happened in Atlas. She is given a lot of warnings (Oscar’s warning abt Salem, Salem’s torture compared to the Madam’s, Watts’ speech, Neo’s threath, Emerald and Mercury leaving her). She chooses to ignore all of these and cuts off all the relationships that could have been either positive or at least neutral. We are in a story hence she will probably receive narrative consequences for all of this.

That said, I do not think these consequences will lead to her death. Still, things will probably go worse for her (and for everybody else) and she will need to be saved by the people she hurt. Once this happens, since we are in a story, I guess she will change and will need an action to cement this change. This action will probably be a sacrifice because Cinder is a selfish character, so to show she has become better she will be asked to sacrifice something. Maybe this sacrifice will be something else, but it could also be her life. This would be coherent with the themes and probably with the stakes. At the end of the story stakes are bound to be higher.

Just to be clear... I would actually be happy if Cinder survives and if this happens in a way that is narratively satisfying. I am not against it. I just think there is a possibility the story may go another way with her. We’ll see. In the end, this is just a theory and we still have a long way to go. New info coming next volume or the one after might change my mind.

Thank you for the asks!

#rwby #asksfullofsugar #anonymous

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nekoannie-chan · 4 years ago

Text

Not professional

Pairing: Brock Rumlow X Reader

Word count: 698 words.

Summary: It was your first interview as an Avengers’ member, maybe you said a secret from Brock that he didn't want anyone to know.

Warnings: Mentions of smut, nothing explicit, bad words.

A/N: This is my entry to the @xbuchananbarnes‘s Dani’s Awesome Writing Challenge Mix Vol. 1 with the prompt #3:

“Quit smiling, you idiot. You’re supposed to be a professional”

Also my entry to the @barnesandco‘s Ayesha’s 1k+ Writing Challenge! With the dialogue prompt #19:

“__. I swear to God, if you do that again, I’ll feed you to Tony’s stupid robot”.

In this fic Brock is not HYDRA, he is also part of the Avengers.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

My other media where I publish: Wattpad, Ao3, ffnet.

If you like it please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @saiyanprincessswanie @charmed-asylum

You enjoyed watching Brock train with each other, in the end being part of the Avengers wasn't so bad, not to say that he had been the one who convinced you to join them.

“Y/N!” Brock called you.

"What?"

”This is the fifth time I've called you, okay?”

"Yeah, I was just distracted.”

"I've noticed," Brock replied while he rolled his eyes. “I was asking you if you're not going to train too.”

"I prefer to see you or... another kind of ‘training’," you said approaching him to kiss him.

"Don't forget that this afternoon we have an interview... am I interrupting something? Steve asked, entering the gym.

"No Cap, that's just what I was reminding Brock," you responded by showing a smile.

Brock winced and went to the locker room to change.

"Nervous about your first TV interview?” Steve questioned you.

"A little bit. Do you do this very often? I mean being interviewed.”

"At least about six times a year, Tony says it's for the team to have public relations and promote us.”

"What kind of questions do you ask?”

"Sometimes personal questions, sometimes about what you think of the other members, as it's your first interview they'll ask you too many questions, I'm sure they'll also be interested in your relationship with Brock.”

"I can already imagine the headlines tomorrow: Crossbones has a relationship," Brock said, going back into the gym after changing his clothes.

"I'll be the star of the interview this time and honey, you'll move on to the background.”

"My fans are going to get sad," Brock joked with a smile.

"Well I wouldn't like that, so we broke up," you replied as seriously as you could, you didn't want him to realize you were joking too.

"I was joking, forgive me," he approached you, putting on a scolded puppy face.

"I was joking too, fool.”

You looked yourself at the mirror for the last time, they had just told you that in five minutes the interview would begin, you had never been to a TV studio before, let alone appeared on television.

The questions had been simple and some even funny, it was just like Steve had told you.

"Well Y/N, it's been a very nice night, I'd like to thank you for agreeing to interview you, now the last question, your relationship with our dear Crossbones has been part of the headlines in recent weeks, but we don't know much about it, what's their relationship like?” the television host questioned.

"Well, Brock may look like a tough guy, but he's very sweet, he even has a stuffed German shepherd dog, he says it's the same as he was when he was a kid," you responded nervously.

"Really? That's very sweet.”

“Y/N...”

You could tell how Brock's face had turned completely red and he was making a great effort not to show his anger, but you had to take revenge before you left the Compound you realized that he had eaten the cake you had baked for the next day, especially for Wanda’s birthday.

"Brock," you called him when you came off the set.

He turned and made his way to you.

“Quit smiling, you idiot. You’re supposed to be a professional”

"I was, I could have said something worse, and you weren't supposed to have eaten Wanda's birthday cake," you counterattacked.

The next day the interview appeared on all the newscasts both televised and written, not to say that it had caused a stir on social media, Brock furiously turned off the TV in the room after hearing what his fans were saying about it.

"Come on, Brock, I could be the president of your official fan club, they loved your stuffed animal, they're even posting drawings about it on Instagram," you showed her your cell phone.

“Y/N, I swear to God, if you do that again, I’ll feed you to Tony’s stupid robot”.

"Brock, we know your life would be very boring without me, you can't deny that you love me, don't be angry, today is Wanda's birthday, at night I'll give you anything you want," you replied as you winked at him, he shook his head and laughed.

#danisawesomewcmix #ayesha1kwritingchallenge #brock rumlow x reader

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sadviper · 4 years ago

Text

2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Succumbing to peer pressure, haha, thank you @rain-hat, @smylealong, @ibelongtomousse, @macgyver-sheriff, @avauntus for tagging me~

It seems the common refrain is that this was the year everyone exploded into massive creative productivity after years of nothing, which is the exact same story for myself. I had read all the strategies of course: write 5 min a day, 1 sketch a day, don’t think about quality, do *something* just to keep the spark alive, etc etc, but it just got worse and worse. Honestly, I had been feeling so dire about it that I had made up my mind to stop trying anymore, because it was so depressing to try and fail so many times that it was much better to not hope at all.

Buuuuut.....then quarantine and telework happened, and woooah, guess what, all I needed was LOTS of time and space to myself where I’m not wasting it in an office checking emails and doing random training to fill all the downtime!!!

Much thanks to the serendipity that had me stumbling into @rain-hat , reading her early JY/KSR fics, and her encouraging me to go ahead and write that office yearly budget oneshot for TKEM (who writes BUDGET fics?? Who reads them???? lol). That’s not in my list here because it was very new and awkward, it was definitely the ball that got everything rolling.

Cut for super long-winded rambling:

1) Before There Was Zero (TKEM)

This was my first big fanfic in my life, and my most popular, and it absolutely gushed out of me in this massive torrent of *I MUST WRITE* where I would walk around at lunchtime giggling to myself, and type on my phone as I went, or wake up at 1am to scrawl something in a notebook in the dark because I couldn’t stop the words from coming. (How I miss that feeling now! ;__;) Actually, it also is the 2nd fully complete long-form story I had ever completed as well, so...lots of milestones here.

Looking back, it clearly was the product of my years of bottled up silence, where I stewed and dragged myself to the office every day wondering if I was going to calcify in a bureaucracy for the rest of my life (yes). But even as an office drone, I learned a lot of valuable lessons in how to manage, what leadership actually is at the worker bee level, the types of games white-collar workers play, and how to be a decent co-worker (and by extension, a decent human being--I don’t believe it’s possible to separate work life and private life. All your personas are you). It wasn’t all a waste after all!

Somehow I connected my day-to-day to the faceless, long-suffering Royal guardsmen in TKEM, headed by the utterly gorgeous, devastating, thoroughly underutilized, comedic prop military action star Jo Yeong, and thought--yeah! :D

2) Nil Desperandum (TKEM)

My biggest fic by far, full novel length at this point, massive in scope, I don’t even know how I came up with it based on the 10 collective seconds of screen time that Jeong Tae-ra and tyrant Jin got as a joke, but I was clearly still on that dam-gushing-pent-up-creative-high because this idea was fighting me when I was in the middle of writing “Before There Was Zero”.

I actually figured out the title while watching “Call the Midwives” where one of the peppy, indefatigable British nurses said to never despair, and I thought, yes, that’s it. All the horrible things I put my tyrantverse characters through, it was only so that when I save them at the end, it will be completely worth it. It’s a bit more violent (nothing beyond My Country levels tho) and quite emotionally dark, but I also tried to inject a lot of friendship, humor, and love into it as well, because there must always be hope.

For My Country fandom friends who didn’t realize, the tyrant!Yeong in this fic is essentially modernAU!Seon-ho, and I lifted Sung-rok entirely from My Country to be tyrant!Yeong’s second-in-command and loyal-superstar-extraordinaire. Writing them in this modern AU, and seeing the positive reception to Sung-rok’s grouchy, dogged devotion was the start of my love spiral for Sung-rok. <3 <3

3) The Veritable Records of King Taejo (My Country)

Going to cheat and lump 3 fics (soon to be 4) into one link. I rested a little bit after “Nil Desperandum” because I had completely emptied myself out at that point, just a husk of an author shell. Then I started poking out oneshots! Each one got progressively harder to write, lol, the creative gas tank was running out of juice, so I had to really start figuring out new strategies as a writer to keep going. One magic tool was coercing recruiting @rain-hat to beta for me, and WOW, THE BEST???? Who would’ve thought it’d be FUN to be edited!!! <3 Due to her efforts, I could avoid the “no beta we die like Liaodong” tag, hahaha.

I grew up watching cop shows, lawyer shows, monster-of-the-day shows, endless procedurals-- so I was super miffed that the drama would imply that Seon-ho spent YEARS just single-mindedly chasing private armies??! No! I want more family and friends development for this sad, dramatic whump child! I want him to be smarter than the show, inherently brilliant despite the stupid he descends into, and be recognized as such by the people who do recognize his value! And I want them all to be happy with no pointless death!

Also, the 4th WIP is now a Sung-rok lovefest written as an ode to his awesomeness, has stretched to 47K+ words, and is being an absolute royal pain to finish. ;__; All the ease and creative fervor from earlier? GONE. I’m a lone salmon flopping upstream on a ladder. I might get eaten before I finish laying my eggs. Any one have tips to get over this?

4) First Translation of Woo Do Hwan Japanese Interviews

More firsts! So much thanks to @ibelongtomousse to inspiring and encouraging me to do some real translating after talking to her about her sublime TKEM fics and translations thereof, and @staidwaters from emerging from the Internet depths to boost/correct my neophyte efforts! I’m now chomping at the bit to do more, even though I may ultimately discover that these interviews have absolutely nothing interesting to say, lol. But my first priority is simply to get better at the language, and 2nd priority is to soak in the words (and photos) of Woo Do Hwan, hahahah. Also, as far as I can tell, no one is filling this niche, so I guess I’ll keep going??

5) Fanart!

I started drawing again! As a procrastination tactic from writing oneshots, but it still was really nice to see that I hadn’t lost the touch entirely. I feel like I’ve mentioned this here and there, but writing wasn’t my first interest--drawing was. Animals first, then people once I discovered anime/manga. I went all into drawing comics, only to face the hard reality that I didn’t know how to tell a story end-to-end. Hence how I started trying to write. Along the way, things happened--I got RSI and had to stop drawing/writing for awhile. I discovered that pictures are NOT worth a thousand words, esp when it comes to long-form comics; my preferred tools of trade (dip pens) ended up exacerbating my RSI problems; then once I got a handle on my RSI, I found I could type faster than I can ever draw, and so here I am. I saw what @convenientalias was doing with their My Country werewolf fic though, so I am excited to try that for my Sung-rok WIP? :D

I think I’m the last hold out among artist/writer friends in answering this wrap-up, hope you enjoyed reading!

#meme #fic meta #2020 accomplishments

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crossdressingdeath · 5 years ago

Note

Omg Please talk shit about Jc, please please please?

I am so glad you asked.

(Under a cut because a) long and b) hiding character hate behind a cut is just good manners.)

Let’s start with the easy bit, shall we? So many people insist that JC didn’t really want WWX dead. “He missed him!” they say. “He felt horrible about him dying!” they insist. This is... so easy to call bullshit on that I’m genuinely surprised it’s such a popular position. It only takes one sentence: He tried to kill WWX the second he realized he was back. Or, here’s another one: He spent the time WWX was dead torturing people to death in case they turned out to be WWX. Now, I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t sound like grief to me.

If you want more proof that he actually did want WWX dead, let’s go back a bit. First siege of the Burial Mounds. Which JC led. There is a reason the cultivation world firmly believes that JC was the one who killed WWX in the end. Yeah, a lot of the fanbase seems to forget that the first thing JC did after their sister sacrificed herself to save WWX’s life was lead a massive force to kill him. And arranging a force of all four major sects after the slaughter that was the pledge conference couldn’t be done instantly; it’s not like JC stabbed WWX in a moment of uncontrollable grief and fury at his sister’s death. No, he readied a force large enough to defeat WWX’s undead army, led them up to the Burial Mounds, and slaughtered all the innocent people living there. (For fans of just The Untamed reading this, that’s novel canon. Obviously in The Untamed things play out differently, but I’m talking strictly novel here. Untamed JC has his own problems but at least he didn’t raise an army against the brother their sister just died to protect, and yes, that’s the nicest thing I have to say about him.)

I’ve talked about my thoughts on the big ‘Twin Prides of Yunmeng’ promise, so I won’t rehash that here. But it does bring to mind another major issue I have with JC: he is so insanely self-centred throughout the entire story. He never even for a moment considers that he actually is better off than WWX. He fixates on JFM preferring WWX, and never realizes that JFM’s protection only extends so far; WWX still spends most of his life on the wrong end of Zidian, listening to YZY insult both him and his parents while JFM at most offers a single rebuke. Both YZY and JC blame him for every little thing that goes wrong, from simple childhood mischief to JFM ignoring JC to YZY and JFM’s failing marriage. After WWX’s parents died he spent his life either on the streets or as the Jiang family’s pet scapegoat. And yet JC acts like WWX was doted on by everyone and never suffered a single hardship in his life. Like JC, the sect heir, was the one who really suffered. Please note: JC was also abused, and he has a right to be angry about it. I take no issue with that. What I take issue with is his apparent inability to extend a single shred of compassion to the person he claimed to love like a brother. He really does remind me of XY; insisting that no amount of suffering on WWX’s part is enough to equal his own pain because WWX’s suffering is only his, while JC’s suffering hurt JC, so was infinitely worse than anything WWX could ever go through. Obvious example: He complains about having felt bad to the guy who was dead for over a decade.

And JC did take part in abusing WWX. I don’t know how much he meant it and how much was his mother’s influence and/or the aforementioned inability to show compassion, but he also blames WWX for everything that goes wrong. He sulks and complains when anyone shows WWX favour over him, even if that favour is earned. See: he freaks out when anyone mentions the list of young masters because WWX scored above him. He refuses to acknowledge that it’s his own failures that lead to WWX being favoured more often than not. As an example, WWX has more friends because JC is cruel. He lashes out at everyone who tries to befriend him, and then acts like it’s all their fault when they decide he’s not worth the effort. We only see him having friendly interactions with anyone when WWX is present; when WWX isn’t there to smooth things over and act as JC’s target of choice, his interactions with people tend to be coldly civil at best. It’s one of the reasons I have yet to find a single ship for JC that I actually like; either one or both of the parties involved is always OOC because literally no one outside of WWX and JYL and sometimes JL shows any indication of doing more than tolerating JC. No one likes him! He’s cold to the people he doesn’t actively attack (verbally or physically)! He is by all evidence a truly horrible person to spend any length of time with!

Speaking of evidence of him being horrible: he can’t even do his fucking job properly. His own people would rather suffer than go to him to deal with any supernatural problems! This is canon! They will not go to Lotus Pier to request the aid of the sect in charge of protecting them because JC has been caught torturing people! I am not exaggerating here. That is in the text. Here, I’ll even quote it:

“On top of that, Lotus Pier is truly a scary place. How would anyone dare go there again?”

(...)

“I haven’t been there myself, but I know someone who went because his house was being badly haunted. But it was all bad luck. That Sect Leader Jiang was cracking a glowing whip right on the training field. The victim’s flesh and blood flew as high as his screams! A servant secretly informed him that the sect leader caught the wrong person again, that he hadn’t been in a great mood, and that he definitely shouldn’t be irritated in any way. He was so scared that he dropped off the gifts he brought and fled at once. He never dared visit again.”

- MDZS chapter 92: Longing (Part 3), ExR translation

(A side note: I occasionally see people insisting that JC wasn’t actually torturing demonic cultivators. Here, have proof that those people are wrong. Additional side note: if this is ‘not in a great mood’ I’d hate to see what actual anger looks like.)

And poor JL! Baby boy deserved better than an uncle who verbally lashes out at him at every possible opportunity and refuses to acknowledge that he’s a fucking child. I’ve talked about my thoughts on that before too, and I’ll happily do it again, but... not tonight. It’s late, and I need to wrap this up. Someone remind me later if you want my thoughts on that particular clusterfuck.

So yeah, he’s an asshole who spent 13/16 years torturing people instead of doing his job. We have no evidence that he’s done any good as sect leader without JYL and WWX there to keep him from doing shit like what he’s apparently gotten up to while they’ve been dead. We have no evidence that any living character other than WWX and JL has any positive feelings towards him that aren’t directly tied to WWX (note that NHS, the only character unrelated to him who has any friendly social interactions with him, doesn’t mention him in an informal capacity once in the present day arc). We do have evidence that he ignores everyone else’s suffering in favour of fixating on his own and spent the entire period WWX was dead trying to ensure he remained that way at the expense of his sect. Not exactly the actions of some absolute sweetheart or... whatever the fuck the fanbase seems to always be insisting he is.

I could keep going. I will if I’m asked. But for now it’s a quarter past midnight and I am all ranted out.

#asks #anon #grapehate #yeah it's got a tag now. i complain about him a lot if you haven't noticed

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northwind4 · 5 years ago

Text

Dearest WingDings（22）

*It's a story about HandPlates! Gaster and Wing! Gaster

*I’ll appreciate it very much if you point out the mistakes I made in the translation, all kinds of help are welcomed!

*previous & next

*Handplates by @zarla-s

Wing!Gaster by me

—————————————————

Chapter22

“You have my word.”

395

G: We should develop a touch screen suitable for skeletons

G: It’s really inconvenient to wear finger cots every time when you use your phone

W: So let’s add it to the to-do list

He leaned over Gaster’s shoulder to watch him typing.

W: By the way, it looks good on you.

396

W: You also have a Webiter account

G: The world’s largest social networking site will help collect information

G: ...and the strong demand from Alphys.

G: Besides, for the students in the academy, I have to know what they are thinking in their inexplicable human brains.

G: I still don’t understand why we have to spend half a day on them every week. This kind of thing can obviously be given to Alphys. She thinks that her class time is too short—

Wing hugs him from behind.

W: Really?

W: Look into my eyes and tell me that you hate those young people calling you “Professor”.

W: You can’t_(:з」∠)_

397

G: What...

G: I haven’t posted anything yet, but many people have followed me.

W: Let me see?

W: Hmm...

W: It may because Alphys has introduced you on her page.

398

G: Hmm

G: Alphys must enjoys this life.

G: Robots and artificial intelligence, large ANIME EXPO, cat cafe, global shopping sites, thousands of flavors of instant noodles and soda...everything suits her taste.

W: And so many fans on social networking sites.

399

G: I remember you also have an account

G: What’s your Nickname there...

G: Don’t say anything, let me guess

G: ...

G: Blacky.

W: You know me(/ω＼)

400

W: I remember

W: I think I’ve seen you before...“you” in another world

Gaster didn’t mind spending five minutes listening.

W: Humans and monsters coexist peacefully there, and everything is completely different...

W: Asgore runs a flower shop called “Flower King”, he doesn’t earn much money because he prefers giving than selling

W: Toriel teaches in middle school, which is like nowadays

W: Alphys and Undyne don’t even know each other! But I think they will meet one day

W: Sans opened a grocery store, and Papyrus seems to be much quieter

W: And, uh, “you” in that world...

W: You have nice relationships with all your families, including the brothers

W: On the other hand...you never step into science.

W: You work in a library where aren’t many things every day, but that’s good, because that “you” also like reading...

Wing started to doubt if he should talk about this, compared a scientist who is shining like stars, this Gaster seemed...too ordinary.

He did not become WHO or achieve SOMETHING.

Gaster seemed to be thinking, and Wing was nervous. Facing his love, he was always unable to maintain extreme rationality, which could make some of his behaviors not get strictly analyzed and judged.

G: ...

G: That’s good.

The young scientist smiled lightly.

“He has everything I have lost.”

401

Wing urged himself to think about some words—comfort, encouragement, sorry, love, or just switch to another subject.

Gaster talked before him.

“But I'm the best.” He looked at Wing, with his words full of unique confidence and pride.

Wing felt like being lighted up.

“Of course,”he couldn’t help kissing him,“of course you are the best.”

“The best one in every time and space.”

402

W: Another successful experiment?

G: A major breakthrough! Resource utilization efficiency has reached to a new level!

G: The energy loss in the process of material conversion is getting lower and lower. If combined with magic, there may be no loss...even without magic!

This kind of topic could always lift Dr.Gaster’s mood. Wing couldn’t tell how much he liked him now.

W: Speaking of materials and energy

W: Well, my body can neither be ignited nor frozen, it won’t react with any reagents, if I want, my weight can become 0

W: What am I?

There was a bit of bitterness in his smile.

W: Sometimes I think, my existence may—

Gaster interrupted him.

G: You are WingDingsGaster, a genius scientist, a mystery man, a hobbyist of dancing, a thermos user, a super cook and a father of four young skeletons

G: And my love.

403

G: When did you become so self-doubtful?

G: Leave the philosophy questions to philosophy

G: And in my place

He pressed the other one on the desk.

G: ...sometimes you are a bit too tall, you should know

Wing was stared down by him.

W: ...

W: I remember you are against dating during working hours?

Gaster shut him up with action.

404

*You were invited to a party hosted by the Monster King.

*You saw the king cut a heart-shaped pie for the queen

*You saw a flower talking to someone you couldn’t see

*You saw the Royal Guard leader picked up her Royal Scientist and shared a Pocky with her

*You saw the tall skeleton playing games with his brother

*You saw the famous star robot feeding the grapes to his cousin

*You saw a Royal Scientist sitting with another world’s Royal Scientist toasting marshmallows

*All these filled you with determination .

405

G: (*fell into the bed) Party must be the most tiring activity

W: But it’s also happy

G: Maybe...

*A message

G: An invitation...to the new energy exhibition NEXT MONTH

W: ...

W: Hm...

He moved over and helped Gaster take off the coat.

W: I suddenly remember I have an extra class for my students tomorrow

W: Sorry...but I have to go check my lesson plan now

He left the room a little too quickly.

406

Wing stood on the balcony. Before Gaster spoke to him, he didn’t even notice his approach.

W: Ah...why are you...

W: I, uh, I’m—

Gaster walked over and hugged him with deep breath.

W: What’s up? Is it a nightmare?

W: Sorry, I should wake you up in time, I-

G: Nothing

G: You’re still there, that’s enough.

Wing felt himself being frozen.

407

G: I dreamed of a world without you

G: The barrier had not been broken, we had collected 6 human souls

G: I still treated the children as subjects, a lot of things happened...a lot of bad things

G: When I opened the cracks of the void, it was not you who came out of it, but a dark...gloomy monster

G: ...

G: Finally I fell off the bridge of the core—then I woke up

G: Everything in the dream is too real. When I woke up, I didn’t even know which side was the reality.

G: What if everything really goes that way

G: ...

G: But it’s just a dream. Look, you are standing right here

G:......?

G: Hello?

408

Wing didn’t respond, and Gaster snapped his fingers to make him back from the unknown imagination.

G: Are you okay?

G: Don’t tell me that you are freaked out by this dream

W: ...

W: No...nothing.

W: Maybe it’s because you ate too much whisky chocolate tonight...?

W: Let’s...go back to sleep.

Gaster stopped him.

409

G: Look at me.

Wing turned away subconsciously, so Gaster forced him with the magic hands.

G: I can feel it

G: When did these start? Your...pessimism, your self-doubts, there must be something troubling you, I can feel it.

G: What happened?

G: WingDings “Blacky” Gaster.

He called this funny full name, the other one tried to step backwards, but he couldn’t.

G: You are making me worried.

410

W: ...

W: I...

Gaster waited for him to continue.

W: I...I’m not sure, just...

His voice was shaking, and his expression reminded Gaster of some poor little skeletons.

411

G: ...

G: Something bad happened to the children?

W: Of course not

G: You got terminal illness?

W: No

G: The end of the world?

W: No

G: You fell in love with others?

W: NEVER!

G: (sigh)

G: Is there anything worse?

412

Wing took a deep breath.

W: The break of the barrier had some effect on the space-time

G: Yes, I remember you’ve said it

G: Did you find out what it was?

W: ...yes.

G: That’s not a bad thing.

G: Or...?

He thought of something, but he didn’t want to follow that line.

He didn’t even want to listen to Wing.

W: I found that the effect was not on the machine that can open the crack.

W: But...

W: ...

W: ...me.

413

W: It was like...the world’s self-cleaning system

W: And I don’t belong here, you know

W: I’m, I-I don’t know when it will-I can feel-

W: I’m......disappearing.

These words almost exhausted all his strength.

414

W: ...

It took him a long time to speak again.

W: I’m sorry.

The other one stopped him from apologizing. Besides the sound of breath, the only thing could be heard was the wind.

After a long silence, Gaster looked up into Wing's eyes.

415

“You owe me a dance.”

#wingdingses #wing!gaster #handplates #gaster #dearest wingdings

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thinking-ji · 5 years ago

Text

A Detailed Linguistic Analysis of ‘Singularity’

Over the past week, I’ve listened to this song an unhealthy amount. While the melody itself is haunting, looking up the lyrics made me realise that the words that accompany the music are even more poetic. The lyrical metaphors always send shivers down my spine, so here I am trying to find out why.

I found two different versions of translated lyrics - one from the official video released on ibighit (which I assume is the official translation), and another from pop!gasa, a source trusted by both fans and the artists whose lyrics they translate. Unfortunately, since I’m not fluent in Korean, I can’t analyse the original lyrics; the best I can do is analyse the English translations and compare the nuances I find in both.

I’ll look at the official translation first; if I feel like it in the future, I’ll continue with an analysis of the pop!gasa translation and then compare both to stitch together a coherent English translation that captures the nuance of this song.

1 A sound of something breaking / I awake from sleep 2 A sound full of unfamiliarity / Try to cover my ears but can’t go to sleep 3 The pain in my throat gets worse / Try to cover it 4 I don’t have a voice 5 Today I hear that sound again 6 It’s ringing again, that sound 7 A crack again on this frozen lake 8 I dumped myself into the lake 9 I buried my voice for you 10 Over the winter lake I was thrown [into] / A thick ice has formed 11 In the dream I shortly went into / My agonising phantom pain is still the same 12 Have I lost myself? / Or have I gained you? 13 I suddenly run to the lake / There’s my face in it 14 Please don’t say anything / Reach my hand out to cover the mouth 15 But in the end, spring will come someday / The ice will melt and flow away 16 Tell me if my voice isn’t real / If I shouldn’t have thrown myself away 17 Tell me if even this pain isn’t real / What I was supposed to do back then

Right off the bat, there are multiple instances of repetition and parallelism on the word and sentence levels. The latter doesn’t particularly surprise me, since music relies on structure and repetition to create a sense of wholeness. Notably, there doesn’t seem to be much lexical variation in this text. This highlights its three key semantic fields. First, the semantic field of sound includes nouns like ‘sound’ and instances of onomatopoeia such as ‘ringing’ and ‘crack’. (Note: It can be argued that ‘crack’ in line 7 refers to one that can be seen, rather than the sound of a crack.) Second, the semantic field of physiology includes nouns that describe human anatomy (‘ear’, ‘throat’, ‘face’, ‘hand’, ‘mouth’), words that describe human physiological processes (‘awake’, ‘sleep’) and words that describe human sensations (‘dream’, ‘pain’, and the phrase ‘phantom pain’. Last and most distinct is the semantic field of nature, which includes nouns like ‘lake’, ‘winter’, ‘ice’ and ‘spring’ that lend the text its more obvious metaphors. Overall, the repetition of key content words like ‘sound’, ‘lake’ and ‘pain’ highlight the relatively dispassionate production of this text and imply that this text was a product of deep reflection.

This text also contains significant parallelism on the clausal level. Lines 1 to 11 include declarative clauses that emphasise the free-flowing, uninhibited nature of the text producer’s narration. These declarative clauses that emphasise the truth of the text producer’s observations seem to increase the impersonality of this text; the elision of personal pronouns that would typically be present also contributes to this impersonality. For example, the first person personal pronoun ‘I’ is omitted from the sentence “[I] try to cover my ears, but [I] can’t go to sleep” to give the second clause of line 2. Similarly, ‘I’ is omitted from the clause “I try to cover it”, to give the second clause of line 3. While these instances of elision could be due to constraints in the song’s syllabic structure, they are significant should they be a deliberate lyrical choice.

The declaratives in lines 1 to 11 are sharply contrasted with the interrogatives in line 12. This invokes an image of the text producer lazily musing about his pain, then suddenly asking the listener the questions in line 12, perhaps wondering if the listener had been attentive to the text producer’s thoughts and emotions. The interrogative clausal mood of line 12 is again contrasted with the declarative clauses in line 13, adding to the feeling of urgency that the text producer emphasises with the adverb ‘suddenly’. It is possible that the text producer came to a realisation after asking the questions in line 12, perhaps as to where his ‘face’ (a metaphor for his sense of self) had gone. Alternatively, this sudden change in clausal mood could be representative of the text producer’s unstable state of mind.

(Before I continue, I’ll point out the obvious, but not especially important, presence of both first and second person personal pronouns in this text. I’m not sure if the instances of the 2ppp ‘you’ are cases of synthetic personalisation. I’d say that the text producer is confiding in/speaking directly to someone — hence, making these ‘you’s instances of direct address — but my evidence is more literary than linguistic, so I won’t include my reasons for believing that here! Either way, I firmly believe that at least two characters are involved in the story that ‘Singularity’ tells.)

While declarative clauses also appear in lines 14 and 15, the imperatives in lines 14, 16 and 17 are much more noteworthy. In line 14, the text producer implores, “Please don’t say anything.” The inclusion of the politeness marker ‘please’ seems to highlight the desperation felt by the text producer in this situation. This desperation is echoed by the parallel structure of the sentences in lines 16 and 17, particularly with the repetition of the following structure: “…if (conjunction) my voice (subject) is not (verb+adverb) real (complement)”; “if (conjunction) I (subject) shouldn’t have thrown (verb+adverb) myself (object) away (adverb)”. This repetition gives the clauses a sense of rhythm and urgency; they seem to follow one another in quick succession. In addition, the incongruent mood of these clauses very effectively emphasise the desperation felt by the text producer. Instead of simply asking if “[his] voice isn’t real”, the text producer passionately implores the listener to “tell [him]” the answers to his questions, specifying the action the listener must take to adequately participate in this otherwise one-sided interaction.

Again, the contrast between the moods of both clauses in line 17 is jarring and further highlights the desperation and dejection felt by the text producer. The text ends with an interrogative clause in line 17 that conjures up a visual of the text producer finally resigning to his emotions, straying from the impersonality of the rest of this text, and pitifully asking his final, most burning question — to which he receives no reply.

One thing I initially found peculiar in this text was the syntax of its penultimate clause. The position of the adverb ‘even’ was strange to me, and I’d read line 17 as “Tell me, if this pain isn’t even real, what was I supposed to do back then?” However, it soon became clear to me that the first three clauses of lines 16 to 17 form one coherent sentence (“Tell me if my voice isn’t real, if I shouldn’t have thrown myself away, [and] if even this pain isn’t real.”). The position of the adverb ‘even’ is as such due to the elision of a pronoun — in this case, the most suitable one would be ’everything’ — from the penultimate clause. The sentence would typically read, “Tell me if everything, even this pain, isn’t real.” It seems that this elision of ‘everything’ could have arisen from the text producer’s denial of the severity of his situation. Either way, the inclusion of the adverb ‘even’ before the noun ‘pain’ suggests that the text producer finds his pain to be the worst part of his regrettable situation.

(What follows strays into the realm of literary, rather than linguistic, analysis, so… tread with caution?)

Another pattern I find interesting is the presence of what seems to be two distinct parts to this song. One part (lines 1-6, 9, 11ˆ-12, 14, 16-17) tells of reality through metaphor; the other part (lines 7-8, 10, 13, 15) compares this metaphorical reality to nature. ˆI will be discussing my conflicting thoughts on line 11 later in this post.

In the former part, the text producer repeatedly draws contrasts between sound and silence. The text also suggests two parallel dichotomies. The first is between the text producer’s own voice and silence. Apart from the clear mentions of his own ‘voice’ in lines 4, 9 and 16, he also sings of the ‘pain in [his] throat’ getting worse and that he “[tries] to cover it”, suggesting that he has little choice but to remain silent. This suggests that the text producer’s own silence is discomforting.

The second dichotomy is between the foreign sound that the text producer repeatedly hears, and silence. This foreign sound is referred to as “a sound of something breaking” (line 1), “a sound full of unfamiliarity” (line 2) and “that sound” (lines 5-6). The text producer also characterises the foreign sound as a “ringing” (line 6), though this could be due to the sound getting progressively louder and more persistent. The text producer’s contrasting preference for silence in this case is expressed through the clauses “try to cover my ears” and “reach my hand out to cover the mouth”. This suggests the eerie presence of a character who seems to be repeatedly preaching a gospel that the text producer finds discomforting.

In the latter part, the text producer uses a metaphor to describe his situation. In short, the text producer threw himself (or rather, his sense of self) into a lake, over which a thick layer of ice has formed. However, there is a crack in this lake. The text producer then muses about how spring will come and the ice will melt away again, but doesn’t seem to entertain the idea of widening the already-present crack. After a sudden realisation (line 12), the text producer runs to the lake and sees his face (another comparison to his sense of self) inside. This reference to Narcissus adds a layer of meaning to this metaphor; in all variants in the Myth of Narcissus, he dies as he fails to acquire the object of his desires. This is similar to what the text producer is experiencing. In line 12, he wonders if he has lost himself after he “dumped [himself] into the lake”, or if he gained someone new (who he refers to using the 2ppp ‘you’) — a manifestation of the free man he once was.

ˆI am still conflicted as to the meaning of line 11. On one hand, I’m inclined to believe it somehow links both the lake metaphor and the sound-silence dichotomies. The first clause suggests that the lake constitutes part of the text producer’s ‘dream’; the mention of ‘phantom pain’ in the second clause is reminiscent of the other instances where the text producer speaks of the pain he feels in his throat (and perhaps also his ears, since pain is commonly associated with tinnitus). On the other hand, line 11 could be the link between the two sound-silence dichotomies I discussed earlier. In this case, the ‘dream’ could refer to the the foreign sound that prevents him from sleeping — perhaps he feels so involved in this nightmarish dream that he feels like he is awake. This ‘dream’ could also be an extended metaphor: the foreign sound could be something that distracts the text producer while he is awake. The ‘phantom pain’ in the second clause would then refer to the pain he feels all the time, when he hears the foreign sound, and when he doesn’t.

(Back to your scheduled linguistics-related programming!)

The final thing I want to discuss is the consistent theme of hiding, or covering up, or elusiveness. Fundamentally, we are not made aware of what is making the sound that the text producer finds so discomforting, or whose mouth he is covering in line 14, or even what is ‘breaking’ in line 1. In the first place, we’re not even sure about who threw the text producer into the lake — do we trust his words in line 8 or 10? The text producer also repeatedly uses the verb ‘cover’ (lines 2, 3, 14). He ‘buried’ (line 9) his own voice and “reach[ed] out to cover the mouth’ (line 15). He seems to have lost his sense of self and is struggling with his identity (as is clear in lines 12-13 and 16-17). All these instances of imagery highlight this theme of hiding that is clearly expressed throughout the text.

‘Singularity’ has a few senses — it could refer to the state of multiple things being one singular whole, or it could refer to a peculiarity. A more poetic take on the title of this song comes from its physical manifestation as a black hole, where matter is infinitely dense and appears to be, well, one singular whole. The text producer’s struggle with his identity and questioning his separateness from his elusive listener is representative of the former sense of ‘singularity’. Conversely, ‘singularity’ could refer to the uniqueness of his struggle, or his quest to find what truly defines him.

I could go on and on about the imagery in this song (as if I haven’t!), but I think I’m going to end this here. I’ve been typing this up for almost 4 hours now. There’s truly so much to unpack here, and I haven’t even linked this analysis to what RM and V have said about this song. (By the way, props to them for this clearly deeply-considered work of art.) As I said at the beginning of this post, I’ll look into pop!gasa’s translation of this song if I’m up for it later on. If you’ve made it this far, thank you! And do make sure to share what you think about this song and what it could mean.

#bts #bangtan #singularity #v #taehyung #namjoon #rm #wings #ji looks at lyrics #ji freaking OVERANALYSES THE LYRICS #linguistics

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poisonappletales · 6 years ago

Note

Hi! I've been a huge fan of your visual novels for a long time, and when I found out you were posting updates on tumblr, I just had to make one myself to follow you! I absolutely adore everything you do. I want to be an author in the future, and your work is truly inspiring to me. So, I have a question that may sound a little confusing, since I don't know how to phrase it correctly. How did you begin to write these stories and characters? I'm quite curious as to how you started.

Hello, cursedauthor! Aww, that makes me so happy to hear. It’s such an honor that you would make a tumblr account to do that. The dream of being an author is a beautiful one, isn’t it? I wish you luck in achieving it! With hard work, effort and love, I believe you can do it.

How did I begin to write my stories and characters? Let’s see…I would say that it started way back around high school. I actually first thought of the story that would essentially come “after” Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces). When I was in class, sitting in the car or simply finding myself with nothing to do, I would think about that fantasy world. I would think about the characters I wanted in them, how they would interact, and the society around them.

Eventually, I had to put my fingers to a keyboard because writing was and still is my number one passion.

I think it was maybe…5-7 years ago? That I realized I wanted to flesh out a certain character’s background even more. After all, didn’t it make more sense to start with the prelude, to say the least? Voila! Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces) was born.

I finished writing that novel in roughly 2 years. It actually had a different title then, but anyway, a little after that, one of my friends was telling me they thought books were something of a fading trend. Some of the bookstores where I live were closing down, so there might be some validity in that, even though I don’t think it’s about to become extinct or anything. (We’re simply moving to the technological era where we read books through glowing screens instead of pages.)

They also shared another concern with me. See, here’s the thing. My friends usually prefer easy reading, like young adult fiction. Some prefer just comic books and/or manga. I like all of those things as well, in addition to classics and a ton of other literature. (I love reading, and fantasy is one of my favorite genres!) Now, influenced by all that, they usually tell me that my writing is complex or “very smart” - not as a criticism or a backhanded compliment. They’re just not necessarily the target audience because it’s not what they’re used to reading.

In light of that, I wanted to come up with a way to expand my audience. Stories are meant to be read, and I wanted to reach as many people as possible - to share what made me happy with others. To touch another person’s world, you might say.

I ultimately decided to go the visual novel route. If I added visuals to the story, you can “see” what I am trying to convey, even without words one may or may find too complex or unsuited for easy reading.

Truth be told, when I first released a test game (Death Room) with a friend, I was a little reserved with my writing style. For that one and my other fun error-and-trial games (Ready, Set, Parody!, War: Valentine Edition, and Don’t Take This Risk), I was actually holding back. I was watering down my usual style with elements from young adult fiction and other easy reading. (Ironically, that takes more effort for me than you might think, as I’m more accustomed to writing the other way!)

I did release War: 13th Day with a little more of my style. For better or worse, that has a very divided reception. Although Wildfire’s part of the narration is more or less simple, the game as a whole is more writing-heavy and slanted towards the psychological genre (in this case, engineered to bewilder!). Typically, players either love it or hate it. (Then again, perhaps I need to update the art style there. It’s just that it fits the dreamy sort of ambiance and perception theme I’m going for so well. I hesitate to think of changing it because the rough-cut edges fit a certain rough-cut persona…)

But with Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces), the visual novel version of which I have been working on since before the Death Room…I wanted to put more of me in it. I remember that in the first version of the demo, I did it again - holding back some of my words. The result was that I think some people came up with certain impressions to fill in the gaps, which wasn’t what I wanted.

For the second version of the demo, I wrote more and you know what? I liked the turnout there. People started to understand my world, and according to the survey results, things like the Translation button were helpful. Success! (Now, there were some people utterly confounded by its existence, but I have to tell you, there are readers who appreciate it! So, don’t be shy about using it. If you rather not tell anyone, it’ll be our little secret. I won’t judge.)

Sometimes, one of my teammates (who’s also a friend) reads what I write in the visual novel script and still encourages me to make it “easier” to understand. I’m trying to find a middle ground there (like with the Translation button) because this is my baby. While I want to make others smile when they see it, I also want to give it all my love. If I hold back what I love too often, it’ll become something stale. It wouldn’t have life and be me.

If you saw me face-to-face, I doubt you would know it at first glance, but I’ve always been something of an old-fashioned person. (Yep, as a matter of fact, nobody has ever come up to me and said, “You know what? I bet you’re a real old-fashioned kind of person.” To be honest, I tend to give off “professional” vibes, the whole clean-cut sort of look, and people tend to think I’ll be a mean person when that isn’t true! I’m happy to be your friend. Just don’t judge me for being old-fashioned, all right? Have an open heart.)

One of my friends teases that I’m like Rip Van Wrinkle, the modern world passing me by. While I do keep up with current media, I’m not always into what’s modern and hot (even though I usually will check it out, and if it’s a book, I’m more likely to read it), so my writing’s not going to fit into a specific mold. My experiences and my own preferences will shape it into its own style.

Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces) will be a step in confidence for me. Altogether, there will be people who enjoy it, people who don’t like it, and people who will go “Why in the world did you make this thing?!” (On that note, please pay close attention to the rating! If you feel there’s anything you can’t handle, then you don’t have to play it. However, I will give you a button to “skip over”/“censor” certain scenes that may be too hard for you. Use it at will!)

However, once it’s finished, I want to step back, look at it and be satisfied with what I’ve made. With the visuals and options like the Translation button, I will hopefully have done all I can to invite you into my heart. Then, it’ll be up to you to decide whether you wish to come in and explore it. Regardless of whether it leaves a pleasant or unpleasant taste in your mouth, I hope you will see the love painted throughout this canvas.

I still think there��s going to be at least one player who will go, “Why in the world did you make this?!” But that’s all right. You do you, and I’ll do me.

One day, when the visual novel’s complete, I might want to release two versions of the original novel. The Young Adult version and the Original. I can’t imagine how many would want to read both, but as I said, stories are meant to be read. This allows easy access, and you have a choice of enjoying either or both. Bon appétit.

Wow, this went on longer than intended! Hope you don’t mind. I believe I ended up wanting to explain how I started developing visual novels as well! Anyway, long story short, I began writing these stories and characters from the sheer power of daydreams. Usually in class. And at home. And in the car. Basically, by being a walking daydreamer in your midst and nobody being the wiser (except my family because they know I like writing). Now, the next time you pass by someone, you’re going to wonder what sort of dreams they’re cooking up in their head, huh? I joke, but you never know what minds are passing you by…

Now, if you’re wondering how I came up with these daydreams…it’s hard to say. In some ways, one could ask: Can you control your dreams? In that case, could you not say writing is like lucid dreaming? And when you’re sitting in class or walking down a hallway, who’s to say where your muse is born? It could be from a wish, a hope, or something more palpable like the sound of music or a drifting butterfly.

There is beauty and inspiration all around you. Just take it all in and let your heart do the work. (I don’t know if that is at all reminiscent of Unknown’s ‘follow-your-heart’ sort of principle, but I personally do think having heart is important. We need more love in the world, you know?)

Anyway, I don’t think I was confused by your question, but if I wasn’t clear about anything or I didn’t answer it right, feel free to ask another. Have a great weekend, cursedauthor, and keep following your dreams! Ambrosia and I believe in you! ♥

#ask

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christinaengela · 6 years ago

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Hello friends and fans!

Welcome to my 19th newsletter: July 2018! Coming up in this edition of Another Round @ The Crow Bar:

Regular updates, new releases, and a monthly spotlight on one of my books, this time, the new release of “Demonspawn“.

Hello!

It’s hard to believe how quickly this year has been passing – here we are in July already, and I still have so much to do! June was a pretty hectic month for me, filled with activities not necessarily related to my writing. MoboReader, a Chinese company that deals with ebook distribution, approached me with a request to list my e-titles towards the end of June. I agreed, and signed a contract with them. This should expand my reach somewhat, and I’m curious to see what effect this will have on my sales.

In the meantime, since publishing the new, revamped version of “Dead Beckoning“, I’ve been working on the long-awaited fourth title in the Galaxii Series, “Lange’s Legacy“. This book is already complete and ready for publishing – complete with brand new illustrations, and I’m also busy with a book trailer video for that book at the moment. This book should be released soon, but not in time for this newsletter unfortunately – so stay tuned for updates on that front.

This time, under new releases, I’ll be telling you about “Dead Beckoning“, “The Galaxii Omnibus 1 – Into The Abyss“.

On with the show!

New Releases

Dead Beckoning

Released on June 12, book 3 in the Galaxii Series, having just undergone the same treatment as the previous two titles, “Dead Beckoning” is now over 50,000 words long, containing a mass of extra more in-depth material, and illustrations!

Order: Paperback (Lulu) / eBook (Lulu) / eBook (Smashwords)

Details:

Published: Second Edition, June 12, 2018

Pages: 158

Words: 51,980 (Flowing Text eBook)

Binding: Perfect-bound Paperback

Dimensions (inches): 6×9″ tall (US Trade)

Enjoy the brand new book trailer video below:

Galaxii – Into The Abyss

Blachart, Demonspawn and Dead Beckoning – the first three stories in the Galaxii Series in one big volume! Released originally in 2017, this omnibus contained the previous versions of these three stories. The re-release contains the new updated versions completed with illustrations and extra material.

The new version is also re-titled and re-covered to match the cover you see to the left!

Order: Paperback (Lulu) / eBook (Lulu)

Details:

Published: Fifth Edition, June 13, 2018

Pages: 568

Words: 188,061 (Flowing Text eBook)

Binding: Perfect-bound Paperback

Dimensions (inches): 6×9″ tall (US Trade)

Currently Available Titles:

The Galaxii Series

Blachart

Demonspawn

Dead Beckoning

Galaxii – Into The Abyss (a special omnibus of the first three titles in the Galaxii Series)

The Quantum Series

Black Sunrise

The Time Saving Agency

Innocent Minds

Dead Man’s Hammer

Loderunner

Prodigal Sun

High Steaks

Underground Movement

Moon Jockeys

Fortitude

The Last Hurrah

The Quantum Series – Keep Off The Crabbygrass (an omnibus of The Quantum Series titles 1, 2, 3 and 4.)

About The Quantum Series will give you more background about the series, its settings and characters. To get a better idea of what the latest two titles are about, read What Readers Can Expect In “Prodigal Sun”, “High Steaks”, “Fortitude” & “The Last Hurrah”.

Work on the next four titles in this series, (“Underground Movement“, “Moon Jockeys“, “Fortitude” and “The Last Hurrah“) is still pending at this time.

Panic! Horror In Space

Panic! Horror In Space #1

Panic! Horror In Space #2

Panic! Horror In Space #3

Panic! is a sci-fi/horror series, which will have some decidedly sci-fi characters encountering some decidedly horror entities – ghosts, haunted objects, zombies, etc. along with my usual twisted brand of humor! The first three titles are available in paperback and ebook versions on various distribution platforms including Amazon and Lulu.

For Children

Other Kids Are Kids Almost Just Like You

Ramalama-Side Up! (coloring book)

Non-Fiction

Bugspray

The Pink Community – The Facts

The Peed-Off Peasant’s Collection Of Awesome Parking Memes

Don’t Get Left In The Dark

Edited By Christina Engela

African Assignment by Theo Engela

A Way Of Life by Theo Engela

Shakandazu Valley by Theo Engela

Op Vreemde Weë by Yvonne Lorraine Engela

When Day Is Done by Yvonne Lorraine Engela

Afrikaans Titles

Some of my titles have been translated into Afrikaans – but as you could imagine, it’s a full-time job – and when you use translation software “sickbay” comes out as “Telaxian stoofpot” instead of “siekeboeg” – so you could imagine!

On A Personal Note

Fan Mail & Honorable Mentions

Noticed in the past month by my shiny new wife and PA, Wendy K. Engela, ( 😉 ) were the following honorable mentions:

Reader and fan, Anya Louw sent me a lovely note about “Dead Beckoning” on the 19th of June:

On June 13, MoboReader asked to feature my books on their platform, and I agreed! The books are already available from there!

I display my Fan Mail & Compliments with pride, gratitude and humility. You are always welcome to have a look.

Hate Mail & Horrible Mentions

The past month was (another) rather quiet on the hate mail front. (What am I doing wrong?) I’m sad to say I have nothing new to show you this time! (I may have something to show you next time though!)

(I’m rather proud of my hate mail, and you can review it here – but be forewarned, don’t do it while eating or drinking or you might choke while laughing at it!)

Interviews

If you would like to do an interview with me about my works, please do get in touch!

New Videos

Have a look at my videos on my Video Channel. The newly updated and totally revamped book trailers for Blachart and Demonspawn are there too!

New Listings

As you can see below, my books now seem to be listed just about everywhere!

CHRISTINA WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! A few nice words go a long way! Please leave your REVIEWS on Academia.edu, Amazon, Anobii, Apple iTunes, Barnes & Noble, Bol, Book Depository, Dilmot eBookMall, FictionDB, Fnac, Foyles, Goodreads, !Indigo, Kobo , Lulu, Lybrary, MoboReader, Nook, Smashwords, Takealot, 24 Symbols – or wherever you see Christina’s books – or just send her an email via the Contact form!

Support The Author

Although most titles listed are available in paperback and/or ebook formats through most online retailers internationally, Christina prefers readers make their purchases via Lulu. This is because while all retailers charge the same price to YOU the reader, Lulu gives the author the largest portion of the proceeds from your purchase.

Monthly Book Spotlight [Spoiler Alert]: “Demonspawn“

“The I.S.S. Mordrake is in serious trouble – after a skirmish with a Corsair marauder, she is stranded in deep space far from regular shipping routes – and death appears certain.

…but in space, not all things are certain, not even death.

At first the discovery of the derelict alien ship is an interesting diversion from the reality of their predicament. After all, it’s far better to explore the wreck in search of some kind of replacement part that could be adapted to repair the engines of the ship, than the alternative – which is to sit and wait for death by hypoxia from creeping cold as the emergency batteries are slowly drained… or, by something else…

Now the crew of the starship Mordrake has to face the terror and solve the ancient riddle of the Akx. Or suffer the same fate as its long dead crew.

“Quite simply, Christina Engela is one of the best voices in sci-fi right now and to not read her work would be to miss a treat!” – Mark Woods, author of Time of Tides and Fear of the Dark.“

CHRISTINA WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! A few nice words go a long way! Please leave your REVIEWS on Amazon, Anobii, Apple iTunes, Barnes & Noble, Bol, Book Depository, eBookMall, FictionDB, Fnac, Foyles, Goodreads, !Indigo, Kobo , Lulu, Lybrary, Nook, Smashwords, Takealot, 24 Symbols – or wherever you see Christina’s books – or just send her an email via the Contact form!

Synopsis:

[Spoiler Alert]

The second title in the Galaxii Series, “Demonspawn” centers on a star ship crew in a seemingly hopeless situation. In book 2, a starship crew faces imminent death due to a poor decision to battle a ready foe.

Adrift and stranded in deep space with no hope of rescue, the I.S.S. Mordrake has six month’s worth of food on board, but less than two weeks of air, and things look pretty grim. Morale, although low before the incident that resulted in their present predicament, is at an all-time low. The ship is not the only thing breaking down however, and pretty soon Commander Joe Lofflin – who has perpetually faced a degree of scorn from his crew because of his sexual orientation and faces a daily struggle to control his romantic attraction to a junior crewman almost half his age – takes on the roll of acting-Captain after the untimely death of Captain Blaine, and must deal with solving a murder on top of everything else!

As if there is not enough on his plate already, just as things are looking hopeless beyond the pale, something dark and mysterious drifts into their path! An ancient derelict ship of alien origins presents an all-too convenient and timely solution to their problem, offering the desperate castaways the spare parts they need to repair their ship. Just when they think they’ve found salvation in the form of a salvage ship they hope to strip for parts – things go from bad to worse.

In the midst of conducting an investigation into the murder of Captain Blaine, in an atmosphere where nobody is above suspicion and each senior officer has reason to suspect every other senior officer, the survivors of the Mordrake actually do find usable parts on board the derelict. In a difficult to reach part of the long dead alien ship – with the only way in or out littered with the dry and dusty remains of the long-dead alien crew – lies the answer to their problem. And much more than they expected. Just when things start to look hopeful again, one by one, the salvage team members begin to experience mysterious accidents… Gradually, it becomes apparent that ‘accident’ is not even remotely accurate.

In order for them all to survive, the crew of the Mordrake must work together – even though any one of them could be the cold-blooded killer who murdered the Mordrake’s Captain. The parts required to repair their own vessel must be retrieved by any means necessary – no matter what it was on board the derelict ship that seemed to want to keep them there!

This is a story of survival and the fight to survive. It’s also a tale that encourages people to look at life in perspective. The challenge of coming out or admitting to a love-interest that there is an attraction is compared to the challenge of surviving combat and facing the unknown, alone in the dark.

Replete with dark, deserted and spooky corridors, a few ghosts, aliens and robotics, a horror stalking its victims in the dark, lasers, explosions, dead bodies and a murder mystery thrown in, this story pretty much has it all!

About The Galaxii Series

Characters & Plot Devices

The Terran Space Fleet & Academy

From The Imperial Terran Archives

The History of “Demonspawn”

Although the first two stories in The Galaxii Series run in sequence (“Blachart” is book 1 and “Demonspawn” is book 2 in the series) both stories occur more or less simultaneously.

Both tell the stories of imperial starships on the hunt for Corsair ships, with “Blachart” focusing on the crew of the ISS Antares tracking down the Corsair base – which would result in the first mass military action by Terran forces since the end of the Gimp War – while “Demonspawn” tells the tale of another starship (ISS Mordrake) which is severely damaged in a skirmish with a Corsair ship and becomes stranded in deep space with little hope of rescue.

Following the discovery and infiltration of Meradinis by the crew of the imperial star ship Antares, the assembled might of the Terran Space Fleet descends upon the Corsair planet. The Battle of Turtle Island rages in orbit over Meradinis, resulting in the absolute destruction of the Corsair fleet – ending the Corsair menace for all time. It takes imperial forces eight months to bring Meradinis completely under Terran control, with the intention of rehabilitating Meradinis and its population and eventually re-integrating them into Terran society. This of course, leads us up to “Dead Beckoning“, the third book in the Galaxii Series, in which the crews of both ships feature strongly.

Demonspawn is currently on its fifth edition, newly extended and full of extra material. The ebook editions have color illustrations and photos in them.

I started working on the foundations of what would become this story when I started high school in 1986. Back then, it was called “The Red Star”, and it featured the some of the same characters, and the story plot was unrecognizable. By 1988, the basic plot had evolved into the story of a starship that encountered an alien derelict ship lost in space, but there was still a long way to go. By 2005 though, the first edition of Demonspawn made its debut on Lulu.com. In 2007, I redesigned the cover.

In September 2014 I finally got a contract with what I thought was a “traditional publisher“, which although it was not one of those printing companies that expect you to pay ridiculous sums to just to have them print your books, more money to design covers, edit the content, and leave you to market the things for yourself – or charge you even more money to do that… left me disappointed and frustrated. They insisted that they wanted the entire Galaxii Series, which then included seven novels and one collection of short stories, and so I took these all down from my website – but the company only ever re-published two of those – Blachart and Demonspawn.

When I was picked up by a so-called ‘traditional publisher’ in 2014, Demonspawn was the second book they re-released with a new cover created by one of their staff. By the time it was released in 2015, Blachart was around 38,600 words long! Apparently that’s not very long by today’s standards, but to put it into perspective, most novels by the great Terry Pratchett are only around 50,000 words long – and I always felt that if it was good enough for him, it was good enough for me! That aside, if a story can be told well in whatever space of words, then that should be good enough too.

But as I do so often, I digress; By 2016 though, things had changed. The publisher abandoned all its ‘non-purist’ horror writers and cut us all loose, so I went back to indie-publishing again. By July 2016, I republished the Fourth Edition of Demonspawn on Lulu.com.

Since 2016, when I went indie again, I’d been working on later books and new projects. Since finishing editing and publishing of most of my parent’s works in early 2018, I took a look at the channels through which my books have been distributed – and decided that I should also place my titles at Smashwords to gain access to their distribution network also.

Smashwords have different publishing formatting requirements to Lulu, and and so, while I was busy releasing “Blachart” via Smashwords, I discovered that I had to reformat the entire manuscript to meet their technical specifications! It looked daunting at first, but I’m a quick study and in the end it wasn’t as hard as I initially thought.

While I was at it (the most dangerous words known to humanity) I spotted a couple of editing errors left over from my “traditional” publishing days, and set off to check the whole manuscript for more. This sparked off another edit, and then I added a little bit here, and a little bit there… and before I realized it, a drastic complete rewrite was underway!

I evaluated each sentence. I added a stack of more material… back-stories and extras that would enrich and enhance the overall experience of what I had envisioned as the Galaxii Series! Two weeks later, the Smashwords Edition of Blachart was finished! Then I designed a fantastic new cover which would also form the basis of a template for the entire Galaxii Series. I also decided to include some illustrations in the book (ebook form) to make it more attractive. I’m pretty sure I succeeded!

I then went ahead doing the same thing to “Demonspawn”.

Reviews:

Something’s waiting in the dark…

“Engela proves she is the newest, best voice in sci-fi with this second volume in her Galaxii series set in the furthest reaches of deep space.

On an Imperial ship, damaged in a battle with corsairs and now floating adrift, tensions begin to rise as the crew slowly begin to realise that they are all about to die. The captain, unable to accept that the current situation they find themselves in is all his fault, sits in his cabin getting drunk when he is confronted by a killer.

And it is in this moment that a small sliver of hope appears.

An alien ship, abandoned in an asteroid field, provides their only hope of salvation but going aboard, the crew soon discover there is a reason why the ship is empty.

Everyone onboard has been slaughtered.

With no other choice, the crew begin the slow process of cannibalising the alien ship for parts, all the time only too aware that there is not just a killer in their midst but also on this abandoned alien ship as well.

As more and more people begin to die, it becomes a race against time – can the crew get the parts they need and get out of there before it is too late? And even if they do, will they still be safe even then?

This book is an awesome read and one that comes across as a mash-up of such films as Alien, Hardware, and Event Horizon.

If this makes the book sound like it is derivative, fear not!

Christina Engela has a unique and brilliant voice that helps make this story her own as she slowly builds the tension to a shocking and tense climax.

Quite simply, Christina Engela is one of the best voices in sci-fi right now and to not read her work would be to miss a treat!

If you like classic space opera with an ultra-modern twist, you should check her out. Having read previews of her forthcoming work, I can guarantee you the best is yet to come…” – Mark Woods, author of ‘Time of Tides’ and ‘Fear of the Dark’.

A real page turner…

“Joe Lofflin, second in command of the Terran deep space cruiser ISS Moredrake, has to inform his crew of 226 survivors of the devastating news that they now only have a few days left to live – no thanks to the actions of their Captain, Philip Wainright Blaine.

The Mordrake was on a mission to locate the home world of their arch enemy – the Corsairs, and after suffering catastrophic damage in a battle, was now left adrift in space – helpless and marooned.

Joe also comes face to face with his own desires as he falls for one of his junior crew members – Dellon Bennett, a handsome 24 year old man in the prime of his life.

The murder of Captain Blaine sees Loffin taking charge of the ship and leading the survivors into an uncertain future. Facing not only death itself, with limited oxygen, they also have to deal with finding the murderer. But that’s not all – this human enemy is not the only adversary they will have to face. A derelict alien ship crossing their path adrift for over 6000 years offers them a tantalizing chance at life, but at greater risk.

Will the murder of Captain Blaine be solved? Will Joe Loffin’s interest in Dellon grow into something more? And will the Moredrake and its crew survive the ultimate enemy?

This Sci-fi thriller brings everything to the table, murder, suspence, action, love.

A real page turner by Christina Engela.” – Zenja Collins, Zen Entertainment

Reader’s Comments:

A knack for writing villains

“The Space Fleet ship I.S.S. Mordrake has been damaged in a confrontation with the Corsairs. The main transmuter coil has burned out and there is no replacement. They are on life support which is running on the emergency batteries and will last only a few more days. Captain Philip Blaine has been murdered and Commander Lofflin has to take over. There is no hope until they spot a derelict ship in space that could have spare parts to salvage but an ancient terror, the Akx awaits them on the ship.

Christina’s writing is lucid and while reading I found myself shifting into ‘3rd gear’, able to immerse myself, immediately grabbed by the story. I liked the way the characters were developed. The strong leadership skills of Commander Lofflin are contrasted with the complete lack of leadership in Captain Blaine. There is moreover a strong theme of ‘confronting your fears’ in this story. Commander Lofflin has to confront his fears continuously. From addressing the crew about the impeding doom, the damaged ship and failing life support systems, right up to asking a young man out for a date. On almost every page this theme is brought in and I found it tremendously interesting.

Christina seems to have a knack for writing villains. With the Akx she really raised the bar. I felt suspense filling my whole body while reading. It kept me reading up till late to find out what happens.

A clearly written sci-fi novella with an interesting theme on confronting fear. The characters are well done and a villain that will raise suspense. Rating: 4 stars out of 5.” – Mr. Green.

Sci-fi fans will love this book

“They say in space no one can hear you scream. In Demonspawn: Galaxii Series Book 2, there are plenty of screams as a creature rips its way through the inhabitants of a spaceship. A crew member, Kaine, tries to take the creature down in one last desperate move.

Reminiscent of Alien, where a helpless crew faces an alien terror, the story drew me in and I could feel that same claustrophobic feel I got when watching the movie. I felt the characters were well developed and the story moved along at a good pace. Sci-fi fans will love this book. It is available to buy now on Amazon. Rated it 5 of 5 stars” – S.K. Gregory.

Engrossing space story

“Engrossing space story.

A crew faces imminent death due to a poor decision to battle a ready foe. Just when they think they’ve found salvation in the form of a salvage ship they hope to use for parts – things go from bad to worse. The best part about the story was the quality writing. Excellent description. Good pacing. Recommend.” – J. Hunter.

Awesome book!!!

“Really enjoyed reading this one. I had a hard time putting it down. Every page leaves you with a burning desire to find out what happens next. The way she writes this book makes it so easy to picture the entire story in your head. Its more like watching a movie than reading a book!!” – Stephanie Bothma

A riveting blend

“A riveting blend of horror and science fiction laced generously with Ms. Engela’s trademark quirky humor.” – Alex S. Johnson

Awesome And Incredible Reads

“Both books [‘Blachart‘ and ‘Demonspawn‘ ] were awesome and incredible reads. I couldn’t put them down. They were fantastic and I was able to get vivid mental images of the scenes as I was reading them. That’s the sign of a great author. Congratulations Christina. Your writing truly ROCKS!” – Scott M. Darrah, reader, April 10, 2016.

Author Questions:

1) The novel is built around a Gay Character – Joe Lofflin. What was your inspiration behind the character itself?

I’d previously written a gay character in my first book – which was Blachart the Corsair. That was a much more complex character, darker and fiercer than Lofflin. Blachart was also a stereotypical ‘bad guy’ who had had a very hard life and lots of negative experiences, who gradually is revealed to be not so bad, and then ultimately, just another one of the ‘good guys’. He wasn’t the main character of that story. In this story I wanted to try a completely different angle with a gay character and make him the focus of the tale.

Commander Joe Lofflin is an experienced officer in the Imperial Space Fleet, he’s popular with most of the crew, he’s got friends among the other senior officers on the ship – and as the second in command on the ship, he’s in his element. Several things happen in Demonspawn to catapult Lofflin to the center of attention – namely the untimely death of Captain Blaine, and their ship being stranded in deep space, purportedly without a hope of rescue.

I dislike it when I see LGBT people being stereotyped – or gay men being objectified and misrepresented as being ‘weak’ or ‘feminine’ just because they’re gay. Yes, there are lots of different ‘stations’ on the sexuality and gender spectrum – and I have created a lot of other characters along the LGBT spectrum in my stories – but in this particular case I wanted Lofflin to portray a masculine male whose sexuality happened to be just another facet to his character. Lofflin is just another guy doing the same kind of job done by plenty of other guys. In short, I wanted Lofflin to be a heroic gay action man, because there are so few such examples in modern media, literature and fiction!

My goal was to portray a character that most masculine people could identify with easily, while providing insight on what such a character would feel, think or do in certain circumstances. As a story teller, I wanted to add more emotional depth to the character – because nobody, not even an ‘action hero’, is as two-dimensional as all that.

Lofflin isn’t a kid. He’s an older man with experience in life as well as having been a soldier. He’s used to giving orders and running the ship and acting as a liaison between the crew and their captain. He’s also single and lonely, and very much aware that in a military environment it’s not so easy to form romantic bonds with others in the same crew, least of all openly.’

2) This being a Sci-Fi thriller you are very specific when it comes to the ships instruments and weaponry. Have you done a lot of research involving this?

‘When I was at high school an English teacher once said something very similar about my writing – she said that I used terminology and descriptive terms with flair and apparent ease! I guess I could say I’ve always enjoyed reading and watching sci-fi and I’ve always had my own ideas on how things should be done. I have a background in computing, I served in the military, and I love history and research, so yes – I’ve also researched a lot about tech stuff and have a broad sense of how some things might work in a future setting.

I think the key with sci-fi stories is to not give too much tech information to the reader. You have to make this stuff believable without getting wrapped up in explaining for three pages how a reflex furnace or transmatter platform works – the typical reader would get bored and lose interest in the story. The story needs to flow, so as a writer I ‘cut the cackle’ and work around lengthy explanations and treat the tech as someone might write about a character using a cell phone today. Not quite that simple, but somewhere between the two extremes, and that seems to work.’

3) Who is Dellon Bennett?

‘Bennet is a young crew member, much lower in rank in relation to Lofflin, and he’s also relatively inexperienced. He has formed a close circle of friends on the ship who share various similar interests, and who very likely are aware of his sexuality.

Dellon is not the ‘action man’ type as it were. Lofflin finds him very attractive, both physically as well as in terms of his personality and character. Dellon is shy and reserved. Physically he might be considered of average build, but there is a refinement in terms of certain physical features Lofflin is drawn to. His eyes, his face naturally – but also his long thin fingers and hands.

The last thing I wanted to do was to reinforce the notion straight people have of ‘who’s the boy and who’s the girl’ by making Dellon appear more feminine, but at the same time I am also aware that a lot of fem gay guys get a raw deal from the community. I wanted in this case to show that there are a lot of fem gay guys out there, and that there is nothing wrong with being fem. People should be happy with how they are or want to be. Two people should be allowed to be attracted to each other for who they are, fall in love, and be happy. So Dellon Bennet, while not exactly a ‘fem’, and not an ‘action hero’ – is a bit of a deviation from several stereotypes as well.’

4) Without giving too much away, what was your inspiration for the Akx?

‘The Akx is a pretty bad-ass plot device, if I say so myself! 🙂

It’s over 6000 years old and it’s pretty much invincible because it knows what your fears are and uses them to beat you before you can make a move against it! Then, while you’re lying slumped in a heap of fear, it strikes! As if that isn’t bad enough, it seems to draw some kind of satisfaction or enjoyment from the fear it creates, and the kill itself!

I’d say that in many ways this could be understood to mean that our own fears are what hold us back as people. Often it’s not what really happens that beats us, it’s what we fear might happen. The Akx is a euphemism for that weakness in all of us.

We can only make progress in life if we rise to meet these challenges and face our fears, look into the eyes of the abyss, and even though we are afraid, do the best we can.’

About The Galaxii Series

Characters & Plot Devices

The Terran Space Fleet & Academy

From The Imperial Terran Archives

Order: Paperback (Lulu) / eBook (Lulu) / eBook (Smashwords)

Details:

Published: Fifth Edition, May 27, 2018

Pages: 168

Words: 51,983 (Flowing Text eBook)

Binding: Perfect-bound Paperback

Dimensions (inches): 6×9″ tall (US Trade)

‘Like’ Demonspawn by Christina Engela on Facebook

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In Closing

Well, that’s all, folks! 🙂

Thanks again for all your support, friendship and interaction! Until next time, keep reading!

Cheers! 🙂

If you would like to know more about Christina Engela and her writing, please feel free to browse her website. If you want to know what Christina Engela’s focus group or target market is, please read here. If you would like to read more about Christina’s life and experiences, please go to her Biography and the article “Timeline of Milestones, Awards & Achievements“. To leave her a message, please use the Contact form. Visit her Shop. ‘Add’ Christina Engela on Facebook (Profile). ‘Like’ Christina Engela on Facebook (Page). All material copyright © Christina Engela, 2018.

Another Round @ The Crow Bar #19 – July 2018 Hello friends and fans! Welcome to my 19th newsletter: July 2018! Coming up in this edition of Another Round @ The Crow Bar:

#art #author #christina engela #drawings #fantasy #female #Galaxii Series #horror #Illustrations #Images #LGBT #newsletter #Panic - Horror In Space #quantum series #sci-fi #science fiction #sketches #South African #transgender

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rose-of-pollux · 7 years ago

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The Thought that Counts (MFU oneshot)

Title: The Thought That Counts Rating: G Summary: It’s 1961 and Napoleon, the youngest CEA in U.N.C.L.E. history, is turning 29. Knowing that Napoleon will be swamped with expensive gifts from those seeking to win his favor, Illya struggles to find a meaningful present for his partner. Dedicated to Robert Vaughn. Notes: This is a ficlit I wrote on the occasion of Robert’s birthday today. Thanks to @ksturf for plot help!

It is also available on both FFN and AO3, if you should prefer reading there.

Illya had been wondering for weeks about what to get Napoleon for his birthday. It was only the second year of their partnership as agents, but a lot had happened in those two years; in the first year, they had, on top of saving each other’s lives, had taken down the Baron of THRUSH. This had resulted in them both receiving promotions to the top two positions at Section II.

They had spent the first year getting to know each other and getting close, and the second year was also spent getting even closer. They were very happy together, and as CEA and second in command, had accomplished a lot that second year.

With the second year already setting as they progressed into November, it was getting to be the that puzzling time of year. He had seen last year how popular Napoleon was in the agency, and how colleagues from all over the different sections had gotten him expensive and impressive gifts. Illya, not used to the culture of such extravagant spending, had been caught off-guard and had felt inadequate with only a sentimental piece of paper as his present that year—his request for a permanent transfer to New York—and had gotten the idea at the last moment, upon seeing all of Napoleon’s presents stacked up on his desk, to treat Napoleon to dinner.

Things were different this year. Not only were the two of them closer, Napoleon, as CEA, would be receiving even more lavish gifts from his admirers, no doubt trying to get into his good books. Mills, from Section VIII, had been trying to give Napoleon gifts all year for various occasions—sometimes no occasions at all; Napoleon had commented and shown these gifts to Illya as he received him, commenting on how he couldn’t help but think that Mills was bucking for something.

For all his high-class living and style, Napoleon could read people well, knowing whether or not gift-givers were sincere. And that was what Illya was puzzling over; he could easily go out and buy something expensive and impressive… But then, how would he be different than the rest of them?

No, it wouldn’t do—it just wouldn’t do! Napoleon was someone who meant a lot to him; someone he cared about very deeply. Whatever he was going to give, it had to be something meaningful, not flashy and showy.

As the big day loomed only 24 hours away, Illya hovered around department stores, in spite of how he normally frowned upon their materialistic mantras. Already, they were pushing Christmas sales; it was absolutely eye-rolling. Illya wasn’t a religious man, but even he felt that whatever Christmas was supposed to be, it certainly wasn’t this.

And yet, Illya felt himself being pulled closer and closer into the trap; the temptation buy something shiny, new, and expensive for Napoleon was increasing by the moment—a gold-plated watch, silver pens, jewel-studded cufflinks and pins…

Illya shook his head, driving the thoughts back.

Nyet, he chided himself. They are merely trinkets that will be rarely used, only seen on odd occasions. Napoleon means more to me than to just give him something that can only be used a couple times a year and will otherwise sit around gathering dust!

Shaking his head again, he left the department store empty-handed, still wondering what to get for him.

He thought of Napoleon’s taste for fine food and wines. Taking him out again to dinner was always an option, but Illya wanted it to be part of his gift—yes, food was practical, even if it was high-end food, but it was a meal, and, subsequently, something that was only lasting for a short while.

Last year, I gave him my transfer and wish to stay here, and he said it was the best present he had ever received. In spite of however flashy he makes himself out to be, he is very down-to-Earth, and he knows about what is important. I am sure I will find something… I just need the proper inspiration…

He was still thinking about it as he headed to work and arrived to the office he shared with Napoleon.

“Enjoy your walk?” Napoleon asked. Illya had given him that cover story to use so that he could window shop for a potential present.

“It was an interesting walk,” Illya said. “How goes the report for the mission we had at St. Petersburg?”

Napoleon let out an “eh” as he paged through a Russian-English dictionary. “Frankly, I’m glad you’re here; can you and your bilingual talents help with some of these translations? My Russian has gotten a bit rusty.”

Illya smiled and sat down in the chair beside him.

“Of course I can help,” he said. “What exactly seems to be the problem? A particular word or phrase?”

“Nothing really in particular; I’m just out of practice,” Napoleon realized. “I knew Russian pretty well when I finished taking it in Survival School. And then I used a little bit when I was in my probationary status, following Mark around. And I still used it fairly well on my own. Even in the last couple of years, I was pretty good with it; I don’t know why I fell out of practice…”

Illya paused, thinking about it for a moment.

“I think it’s because of me,” he said, quietly.

Napoleon blinked in surprise and looked to Illya.

“What are you talking about? You are Russian; if anything, that should have spurred me to practice more…”

“Not really; with the both of us around, I would have, naturally, done all of the necessary talking in Russian. That would mean that you wouldn’t have as much of a chance to do so, and that is why you have fallen out of practice with the language—at the very least, it is partly the reason.”

Napoleon pondered over this.

“Huh…” he said. “Well, I guess it is easier to let an expert handle something when you know they’ll be better at it…”

“But then you just get worse because of it,” Illya sighed. “I truly am sorry for this, Napoleon.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Tovarisch; you certainly didn’t intend to sabotage my language skills,” Napoleon grinned. “Nah, it just means I need to resist the temptation to let you handle all the Russian when we work. …In fact, it’ll probably be a good idea if we decided on a certain part of the day where you only talk to me in Russian—not English. That should help get the wheels turning up here again.”

Illya managed a wan smile.

“Of course,” he said. “If I can help you get your skill in the language back, then I’ll do whatever is in my power to make it happen.”

“Great; so I’m thinking dinner time—lazy evenings when we start talking about all sorts of things,” Napoleon said. “All those conversations will be good in remembering if they’re in Russian.”

Illya nodded.

“Of course,” he said. “Dinners, then. But, in the meantime, what do you want to do about these reports?”

Napoleon looked at the paperwork in his hands and on his desk and scowled, clearly fighting a private war—on the one hand, he found paperwork to be a drag in English; paperwork in Russian was even more tedious, and Illya could help him get through it in a fraction of the time.

On the other hand, if he had Illya do most of the work for him, well… That meant he was shirking practice in the language yet again.

Illya watched Napoleon as he sat there with his brow furrowed, and a genuine smile managed to cross his face.

“How about I take half of that paperwork?” he offered, kindly.

Napoleon looked over to him and grinned again.

“Sounds great to me,” he said, fervently. “Oh, and I’ve been meaning to ask you something…”

“About what?” Illya asked.

“Well, I just found out that there’s going to be a free production of Much Ado About Nothing this weekend—it’s that Shakespeare in the Park thing—it’s started getting pretty popular.”

“Ahh,” Illya said, smiling. “Of course; I should have known that a fan of the Bard such as yourself would want to see it.”

“You bet,” Napoleon grinned. “Of course, you know I’d prefer Hamlet most of all, but Much Ado is a good play, too. And since it’s the weekend after my birthday, I was thinking we could have a picnic dinner and then enjoy the play and call it an evening—if you’d be open to the idea, of course.”

Illya had to marvel at him for a moment; for all of Napoleon’s insistence that he loved the good life, he really did have such simple pleasures. It certainly made Illya relieved that he hadn’t fallen into any of the department store traps earlier that morning; he had made the right decision there.

He suddenly had a flash of inspiration, realizing that he did have access to the perfect gift after all.

“Da, Napoleon,” he said. “We can go see the play together this weekend—but I wish to take you to dinner for your birthday tomorrow.”

“Well, how can I say no to that?” Napoleon said, grandly.

Illya smiled back at him, pleased to see him so excited. He could only hope that the gift he had decided on would give him the same joy.

*********************************

Even though Illya had made peace with his choice of gift, he still, nevertheless, felt that same self-consciousness from last year return as he placed his small gift with the other flashy, wrapped boxes on Napoleon’s desk.

Once again, he was beginning to doubt that he had made the right choice after all. What had the others gotten him? Even if he knew that Napoleon was smart enough not to be bought off with lavish gifts, the doubts remained.

Napoleon hadn’t arrived yet; he was coming in a bit later that morning after working on those mission reports. Mills from Section VIII kept popping in all morning, looking disappointed to see that Napoleon wasn’t there, and—it almost seemed--also looking disappointed to see Illya there at all. Illya just ignored him; he had other things on his mind, after all.

Napoleon strolled in later, whistling “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning” and paused to greet Illya.

“Happy Birthday, Napoleon,” Illya said, smiling to see how happy he was. “I am glad you were able to put those reports behind you.”

“Me, too—and I couldn’t have done it without your help, so thanks,” Napoleon said. “Also, I think our Russian-only hour last evening really was beneficial to me, so thanks for that, too.”

“Do you still wish to have Russian Hour tonight, as well, or shall we forego it, since it is your birthday?” Illya asked.

“Hey, it’s my birthday no matter what language I speak; I say we keep at it,” he said, looking at himself in a mirror. “Hmm, 29 isn’t looking bad at all!”

“Let me put your vanity at ease and assure you that you will still be looking your best even at 79,” Illya said.

“Oh, since when did you become clairvoyant?”

“Since I realized that it’ll get you away from that mirror,” Illya teased.

Napoleon chuckled in spite of himself, and then turned his attention to the pile of presents on his desk.

“Well, better start getting at this so that I can fill out those thank-you cards,” he said, cheerfully.

And Illya sat back and watched as he opened one gift after another—gourmet chocolates, crackers and caviar, fine cheeses, a couple bottles of vintage wine, cufflinks and tie pins, and—Mills’s gift—a sterling silver platter.

With some amount of satisfaction, Illya watched as Napoleon scratched his head at the gift.

“Well, it’s nice,” he admitted. “…I guess I’ll find some use for it.”

He shrugged and put the expensive gifts aside, and then picked up Illya’s. Illya held his breath as Napoleon opened an old, bound book with Russian writing stamped on the cover in gold leaf. He tilted his head in curiosity, and, suddenly, the light bulb went off as he realized what it was.

“Illya, is this… Hamlet?”

“In Russian,” Illya said, with a nod. He gave Napoleon a sheepish smile. “I got the idea after you said that you wanted to get back the skill you had in the Russian language, and then I was reminded yesterday of your love of the Bard’s work. I apologize for its condition, but it has been through a lot…” He sighed. “It used to belong to my father; it was part of his library. After the war ended, I went back to the house to see if there was anything left of it that I could take… This was one of the few things that I was able to salvage. But aside from a little wear and tear, it’s readable.” He smiled. “I think you can appreciate it more than I can—and since you practically have the play memorized in English, reading it in Russian will help you with the context. And even after your flair for the language returns, you can still enjoy reading it, as well.”

To his surprise, Napoleon was looking as though he was trying to swallow a lump in his throat.

“You’re darn right I will,” he said at last, and he drew Illya into a tight hug. The book was one of the few things that Illya had of his parents, and yet he had willingly given it to him as a thoughtful gift, one that he could enjoy and would use. That meant more to him than any of the priciest gifts in the Diamond District.

And Illya hugged him back, relieved and happy that he had gotten Napoleon exactly what he had needed.

And after an enjoyable day and an enjoyable dinner, they spent a lovely evening together on Napoleon’s sofa, reading from the play and reciting the soliloquies together in Russian—among them, the “To Be or Not to Be” speech, the Fifth Soliloquy, and, together, they did the final exchange between Hamlet and Horatio.

And as Illya recited the scenes with him, he took joy in seeing the unbridled happiness in Napoleon’s eyes, his heart warm to know that he had, once again, found the perfect gift for his partner.

#Napoleon Solo #Illya Kuryakin #the man from uncle #mfu fic #Happy Birthday Robert!

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bearholdingashark · 5 years ago

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Worldbuilding Exchange Creator Letter

Thank you for accepting my request. :)

I’ve never done this exchange before, but I’m really excited for it.

Some general things: I’m pretty ship focused, although I’m good with gen fic too, just know that ships are totally okay. :) I’ll put the main ships I like in the prompts so you know, but don’t at all feel like you have to go that route. I also love outsider POV.

Same goes for the prompts, of course. If anything helps with what you’re creating, great! But feel free to go your own route too. :)

As far as worldbuilding goes, I really like backstory, costume details and how they inform the worldbuilding, impact of certain decisions, news articles, historical documents, and just general exploring of the world. If you enjoy writing it, I’m sure I’ll love reading it. :)

My DNWs include main character death, gore or NSFW. I’m okay with some violence as long as it’s not super graphic, and romance/kissing is fine, just nothing beyond that.

And now onto the specific:

Request 1

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug

Characters: Any/None, Marinette Dupain-Cheng|Ladybug, Adrien Agreste|Chat Noir

(Ships: Any side of the love square although post reveal power couple is my jam, DJWifi)

Worldbuilding:

The wider world’s take on the crisis in Paris

We don’t get to see this, I would love articles/newscasts/internet posts, etc from outside of France about how they view what’s going on in Paris

Are there other superheroes in the world? Are miraculous users only in Paris? And if Paris has the only superpowered beings, how does the world react to that? Admiration? Jealousy? Fear? Are there any major responses to Ladybug and Chat Noir’s existence?

Superhero fan culture

Somewhat related to the above prompt, does the fan culture stay mostly in Paris/France or is it more widespread? What kind of fan works and/or merchandise has popped up? How does the Ladyblog interact with fandom?

Mental health effects on people of Paris

How does having to constantly watch your negative emotions effect everyone? Are the therapists/counselors of Paris completely swamped? Do people resort to other ways to cope? Are support groups of akumatized victims a thing?

Legal implications of akumatization

Ladybug’s miraculous cure takes care of the property damage, but what about other effects? Do people take legal action for the emotional damage of being akumatized? How is that addressed when the perpetrator is still at large? What do police reports look like around akumatizations?

Magicaron|Magicamembert Power-up Potions

What are the other power ups for? We’ve seen a few, but there were so many in the box, any exploration of how those work would be great. How did these power ups come to be?

Historical Miraculous Wielders

We’ve seen some historical wielders, but it would be great to see original miraculous users too. Especially if it’s not just the Ladybug and Cat miraculous being used.

Request 2

Fandom: Princess Tutu

Characters: Any/None, Fakir, Ahiru

(Ships: Fakiru, Rue/Mytho)

Worldbuilding:

Raven and Prince conflict

How did that conflict begin? What were the major opinions in the land surrouding about this conflict? How was the Prince advised prior to entering the conflict?

Previous stories of Drosselmeyer’s

What else has Drosselmeyer written? Have any of his other stories come to life? Has he always had that power, like Fakir? Did he try to fight it in the beginning too? Maybe something bad happened to him initially, but he got past that as he gained more power?

Drosselmeyer’s power

We know some about Drosselmeyer’s power, and about Fakir’s power, which comes from Drosselmeyer, but where did it come from? Was he the only one who had this power or were there more? Did he inherit his power?

Request 3

Fandom: The Scarlet Pimpernel

Characters: Any/None, Percy Blakeney, Marguerite Blakeney

(Ships: Percy/Marguerite)

Worldbuilding:

Knowledge in England of the Pimpernel’s identity

Who else knows who the Pimpernel is? Or thinks they know? Who are some of the guesses people have about who he is? I know this request is for the book fandom, but something along the lines of the Scarlet Pimpernel song from the musical would be great too.

English people learning to pass as French

I would love to see something comedice about Percy (or Marguerite if it’s set post book) teaching English members of the league to pass as French. But something more serious too would be good. Maybe someone’s not picking it up as quickly, and they end up having to try and pass in Paris when the plan falls apart. What happens then?

Arranging routes out of Paris/through France

Percy is such a logistics/planning master, but who else helps him with this? (Does Marguerite ever?) It would be great to see something about how the routes/plans get set up and how they actually end up, as sometimes the plans fall apart.

In-universe RPF fanfiction and fandom

Somewhat connected to my prompts for the first worldbuilding aspect, but who do people think the Pimpernel is? Are there any fics going around about Percy? What does the fandom look like? The Pimpernel is such a popular and mysterious figure that everyone is interested, but what does the deeper fandom look like? (casual fans vs fandom)

Request 4

Fandom: Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Characters: Any/None, Belle, Adam

(Ships: Belle/Adam)

Worldbuilding:

The Enchantress’s powers

We know she’s got shapeshifting/illusion and curses down, but what else can she do? Tangentially, has she done this in the past, or was the Prince special?

Side effects of being cursed

How does living as an animate object/animal for a decade do to a person? How does the staff and Adam cope with being human again? Are there traits/abilities they maintain from their time under the curse? Could be humorous or serious. (Or both.:D)

Political and social climate of kingdom before curse

How were the Prince and his parents thought of before the curse? The Prince is a dick to the Enchantress, but going off the movie math, he was 11. Were his parents worse or was he just a dick? (Or is there context we’re missing? Why was the Prince answering the door himself? Stranger danger?) How powerful was the kingdom before the curse?

Other Enchantresses/Magic users

If the Enchantress isn’t the only magic user, what are the others like? Are there others with similar powers/power levels? Is there a higher magic user/group that they answer to? If so, what was their reaction to the curse? Or was she there on orders?

Request 5

Fandom: Descendants

Characters: Any/None, Ben, Mal

(Ships: Ben/Mal)

Worldbuilding:

United States of Auradon creation

Beast (although I’m happy with Adam if that’s what you prefer to use) “united all the kingdoms got himself elected King of the United States of Auradon”. What did that look like? Why was it an election to start with that then became a monarchy? What were the other ideas for how the country should be run? Who might have been running against Beast if it was an actual election? How was the story of the creation told around Auradon and the Isle vs how it actually happened?

Modern technology in conjunction with magic

Auradon has mostly given up magic, and the Isle doesn’t have magic. How does magic work with the modern technology? Are there any generational differences around the use of magic vs technology?

Giving up of magic in Auradon

Going along with the above prompts, was magic mostly given up because of technology? Was it seen as superior? Or was it seen as too much of a temptation to use it for evil? How was that decision come to? How did the general populace react to that decision?

Economics on the Isle

The Isle is clearly poorer than Auradon, but how does their economic system work? Do they use the same currency as Auradon, or is it more bartering or some sort of combination or a totally different system? How does this translate for the VKs when they come to Auradon? (Not saying have Ben take them to a grocery store, but I certainly wouldn’t mind something like that.)

Creation of the Isle

Mal’s narration has the Isle as mostly Beast’s decision, but who else was involved? Was Belle really in favor of it, or did she come to agree with it later? I get a prison, but this involved families and put the bigger villains in with the smaller time criminals. Who was in favor and who was against? What were the other ideas for what to do with the villains?

#Worldbuilding exchange #creator letter #I'm new to this one #but I'm excited

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todaydreambelieversfic · 7 years ago

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Author Spotlight: KlaineShip2 day 1

And now for someone a little different... Klaineship2 is a fic translator who translates her favourite fic into German.

DAY 1: Meet the author

First of all I want to thank @damnpene and @spaceorphan18 for finding me worthy to stand in the Author's Spotlight. I feel humbled to be included in the circle of fandom authors, though I don't write original fic myself but I translate them into German.

1. Why Klaine?

In Germany Glee season 1-4 aired from Jan 2011 through Nov 2013. I loved the music. It reminded me of the tv-series 'Fame – Der Weg zum Ruhm' that I had once loved watching (it was about a New York Performing Arts-HighSchool – who remembers kindhearted keyboarder Bruno Martelli or rebellious Leroy Johnson?) and I tried not to miss an episode. Of course it was the German Dub version and while Kurt's German voice is very similar to Chris's, the German speaker overdid it a bit with Kurt's uppity attitude and it took me some time to warm up to him. But when the bullying got worse I connected to him because I'd also experienced bullying during my school days. When Blaine Anderson entered the scene I fell under the spell of the love those stupid boys shared for one another (like you all did, too).

In 2014 Germany stopped airing for whatever reason and I had to wait for the UK-DVD release of Season 5 in October to continue watching (Don't tell me about internet possibilities to watch series from other countries – I am a computer dummy and never knew how to do that) In the meantime I had purchased the Season 1-4 DVDs as well and watched it over and over again in English which made so much more sense to me. During that long break I started to search the internet and found the glee.wiki pages. During a discussion there someone mentioned fanfiction and listed his favourite 5 AUs, including @flamingmuse 's 'Near Misses', which led me to her livejournal, where I fell in love with her fics, which led me to AO3 and that was when I fell into the rabbit hole that is fanfiction, and I didn't find a way back since. When I read a particular entrancing line I sometimes wanted to know what it would sound like in German and tried to translate it. In January 2016 I finally started with a short 600 word story just to see if I could do it, because I am not a professionell interpreter and, well, I kind of liked it and continued translating my favourite stories.

2. What draws you to the kinds of stories you translate?

At first I only read canon compliant stories to fill in all the logical gaps and give me a bit of understanding what went on in those boys heads but then I found some very inspiring AUs as well and I indulged myself in sweet and angsty stories.

So the most important to me are the missing scenes and I started to post translations of my favorite ones for each season. Season 1-3 are completed, and I'm going to start on Season 4 in a couple of days. I am very particular about them being really canon compliant. There are several authors who I adore for these wonderful pieces. These fics don't always have to reveal any specific insights, I love fluffy domestic Klaine just as much and of course some sexy Klaine once in a while.

In AUs I love it when they have really realistic story lines and are not just that overly lovey-dovey stuff. A good AU for me is not just Kurt and Blaine and Love/Sex but real life background. My favourite AUs tell stories about Kurt and Blaine going through very angsty and dark times (like misunderstanding, injury, depression, crime aftermath or immigrant politics) struggling and hurting a lot but coming out of it as stronger and better people. There is also Firefighter!Blaine or Deaf!Blaine but always with a lot of background and context. This background and context is also very interesting to me for a better understanding of US culture (e.g. college / Broadway / Immigrant situation) or to compare it to Germany (e.g. health system / fire department / Deaf Culture)

What kind of stories do you most enjoy? Do you translate fluff? Angst? Sex? Have you ever translated anything way outside your usual wheelhouse? Do you prefer to translate AUs or fic that’s consistent with canon?

Starting with the last question: as I said in the previous answer. I enjoy both: canon compliant stories and AU's with complex storylines and a lot of realistic background, but also domestic every day life with a bit of sex to spice it up once in a while.

Something way out of my comfort zone would be Dom/Sub or hard sex kinks and I never translated that.

But I do translate fluff, angst and sex of course, though I was quite nervous when I posted my first sex scene. It's not always easy to find the proper words to transport the vibe of the situation into another language and I never wanted it to just be vulgar. Since May 2017 I have the wonderful @klaine-rants as a beta and it makes things much much easier when you have someone to discuss it with.

Is there anything you avoid that's particularly hard?

It's particularly hard to translate wordplays or puns though up to date I always managed to find a German equivalent (*knock on wood*). What I completely avoid are topics that include a lot of technical terms or specialized phrases from businesses or branches I know nothing about. Like I really enjoyed 'The Sweet DREAMers' Verse' by @perryavenue about undocumented immigrants but I don't think I could properly translate all those specific terms concerning the administration laws, regulations or institutions. I had a very interesting conversation with her concerning US immigrants politics vs European/German including WW II but still I'd never dare to translate it. Same goes for @adiwriting‘s 'A Minute From The Deep End' which deals with judicial proceedings and court trial.

What do you feel like you bring to the story?

Glee and especially Klaine have many German fans, but not everybody can read the fanfiction in English. By translating it I can share my favourite stories with many German fans who wouldn't have the opportunity to read these stories in their original language. Of course these readers aren't usually on AO3 (understandably, my stories there have not many hits) , which is why I post the translations on www.fanfiktion.de , too. It is the German equivalent of AO3 and my name there is Klaineship https://www.fanfiktion.de/u/Klaineship as well. My translations (which are always linked to the original, as I'd like to point out) have many many hits there and lots of comments and discussion.

Sometimes there is an educational aspect as well. Particularly with my first big multi-chapter-translation of the 'Hearing Verse' by @adiwriting I had to do a lot of research concerning Deaf Culture, Sign Language, educational issues and so on and I provided my readers with a lot of information about similarities and differences between our countries concerning Deaf Culture and Deaf Communities in footnotes after each chapter. If I hadn't translated that story I would never have learned so much about this topic (including a bit of American and German Sign Language). So I think by translating I spread a lot of information to many readers who had never been in touch with Deaf Community before (just like me).

Do you communicate with the author as you go?

Of course! If I like a story I leave kudos and if I love it I leave a comment as well and normally this is my best chance to ask for permission for translation. Only in one case have I gotten a no for an answer, usually the author is thrilled to have their story translated.

Unfortunately some authors don't answer comments in general or my request in particular, and I'll never know, if they just didn't get my request or if they really don't want the translation. So please, if you don't want it, just say so, but don't leave me with 'what if'.

When I started the big multi chapter Hearing Verse almost a year ago, I had a lot of questions concerning Deaf Communities and education of Deaf children and I communicated a lot with @adiwriting who finally even gave me access to all her spreadsheets and timelines concerning that universe.

The only reason I got a Tumblr account about a year ago was to have a better possibility to get in touch with 'my' authors. And there are some authors who even comment on my translations and leave kudos there wich is the greatest praise I could ask for. Thanks to all of you. You are the best!

But unfortunately there are also some authors who not even link their work back to my translation although they get a notification from AO3 as soon as I post. Of course I know that they are not obligated to do so, but they ask me to link my work and I always do and I would truely appreciate if they linked it back as well, so that potential readers see that there is a German version available.

#author spotlight #translator

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undeadimpulsereviews · 7 years ago

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Onechanbara Z2 Chaos

What kind of gamer are you? Are you the type who will play whatever you please, do you not care for genres or place of origin? Maybe your a little more of a casual player. Do you only play a few genres of games? Well regardless of how you play I have one question for you. Do you know what Onechanbara is? Chances are, regardless of your gaming history, you’ve seen or heard of this series. Take me for example; before I reviewed games my preferences were vastly different. Yet I would occasionally go to my local game store, and this game always caught my eye; not because it looks interesting, but for pretty different reasons. Let me explain

Onechanbara is a long running series in of hack and slash style games. It’s a game from development studio Tamsoft; it’s a budget title that has some sort of fan-base to it. I can’t speak for Japan; it’s clear they probably like the game giving it’s long history, but yet from my experience it’s been something I can only describe as outlandish. The first ever game in the series that I saw was for the Xbox 360; I was probably getting near the end of high school around this time. Just wander into my local game store to see what games were available to me, and what do I see sitting on the shelf in front of me? Why Onechanbara of course; though it wasn’t the name that caught my eye, or any previous knowledge on the series. At this point I knew nothing about the game, or what it was about. All I had to go on was the box art in front of me, and man was it something “special”. The name of the game was Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some weird 360 games out there; however, you can’t tell me that if you saw this in the store you wouldn’t do a double take. This game was the first game we in the states had the privilege to obtain. All the other games in the series were either Japanese exclusives, or also released in Europe. So English translations did still exist; that being said the series dates back to 2004, so the time line is vast and confusing for someone like me who’s only played the latest game in the series. When I started this blog, I juggled with the idea of finally playing this game; I knew going in that this game was “interesting”. I’ve seen gameplay from a previous installment and man, was it something else. This was one of my ultimate goals; if I was going to play both the good and the bad, then this needed to be played. Now I went into this game with the same expectations as Bound by Flame; by that I mean I had no expectations. Yet bear with me when I say this, but I think that this game is better than Bound by Flame. In fact, I’d go as far to say that it’s the best thing I’ve had to review all month. Now there may be some out there baffled; “Luke how is this budget and broken title better than the last three monstrosities? Well I’ll explain, but before I get to deep into things, keep this in mind. How seriously should we view this game? Onechanbara Z2 Chaos, is a mediocre title with some pretty bad parts to it. The story is confusing and boring; this is partially due to my lack of knowledge of the series, but at the same time there are problems with it’s telling. The characters are bland and overdone caricatures of other characters from other game series. The visuals and music is odd to say the least; I think I got the best quality when it comes to this, but this takes the term budget to new lengths. Lastly the gameplay is clunky and feels weak in many areas. Even for a budget title this is really bad,but enough of all that; let’s dive into the story and see if we can get a little understanding for whatever this game is.

Onechanbara follows the story two feuding families; these families are known as the Baneful, and the Vampiric. Both families are a group of ancient demonic beings; the Baneful are those of cursed blood. They attract or react to tainted blood, for example from the undead. Two of our main characters Aya and Saki are Baneful, and they work as zombie hunters. The Vampiric are just as they sound, while not sharing all the rules of the traditional vampires they feed off blood and thrive from it like vampires would. These two families have been at each others throats for some time now and as we come to present day, both families have almost been completely wide out. The game takes place directly after the last game; Kagura and Saaya, the two Vampiric sisters, have just killed their adoptive mother with the help of the other two. Though after all was said and done, the truce between families could not stay firm; the sisters fought each other, each with the intent to kill. Yet another evil lurked in the room; a mysterious green haired women has made her appearance, and once again the girls must put their differences aside to stop this greater evil. Will the families be united under these unlikely heroes, or will this mysterious third party get her way? Only time will tell.

This synopsis only covers the starting ground work for Z2 Chaos, and the outcome of the previous title; though there are clear moments in the game where other information from other games would be necessary. For example, later in the game you meet a character named Misha; I don’t know anything about this girl, and the game doesn’t do a good job of explaining her character because it expects you to know. I know this is the latest game in the series, but the two other games in the US are the 360 game I mentioned before, and a Wii game that is a direct sequel to the 360 game. Between the Wii game and Z2 Chaos, there are three Japanese exclusive titles; sure the demographic for this game might be low here in the states due to it’s style, but if you’re going to introduce more of this series outside of Japan then you need to have some easy way for those people to get the material from previous games. Due to this, for those who might be interested in the game, the story gets really confusing. Though the biggest problem with the story is that it just feels so bland; I don’t care at all what happens to the world or it’s characters. The two families and their on going feud holds no gravity for me; I know nothing about them or why they fight. The story doesn’t develop well over time, and it feels really rush; plus the way the story is told is really odd. You get these random unannounced sequences that try to go for a sort of comic book layout. For me these moments took away from the story; I wasn’t focused on the story that was unfolding, or the plot that was trying to be explained. Instead I was distracted by everything filling the screen.

The one above isn’t as drastic, but these do get worse the more people are present. That and these happen rather sporadically, you’ll either get normal cutscenes, or these framed moments. It dawned on me what exactly Onechanbara was trying for, or at least this is the impression I got. This series is trying to do what Devil May Cry did years ago. They wanted to make a cocky cast of characters; a cast that feels slightly out of place in the world they’re placed in. There are a lot of similarities between the two games; A demonic main character (half demon in Dante’s case) taking on demonic entities that are planning to destroy the world around them. This main character is often sarcastic, and also well versed with certain weaponry. Not to mention they’re the same style of game. The only problems with Onechanbara is that the story doesn’t really reach the same gravity that Devil May Cry could reach, the characters are still vastly inferior to Dante and his crew, and the gameplay isn’t up to par. Though this is where my reasoning for my view on the game is. Just like Devil, you should never take Onechanbara seriously; I mean you’re fighting the undead as two half naked women, and their sisters. If you’re going into this expecting the next big thing then you’re in for a rude awakening. I knew this going in, so I came out with a slightly average outlook. Though everything I’ve reviewed this month up to this point have all tried to be serious in their own right. However, that seriousness is lost on me with how terrible it’s approached. Bound by Flame was attempting to be the next Dragon Age, but instead of being a serious fantasy story it comes off as just another terrible excuse for a game. While Onechanbara is trying to be something it isn’t; it still captures that random outlandish nature in it’s own way. Is the story good, or interesting no, but if there is one good thing I can say about this game, it at least knows what it’s trying to be. Does that excuse the game? Not by a long shot, and the blame doesn’t solely rest on the story. Every part of this game has something to answer for, from the story right down to the characters present.

Onechanbara’s main problems come from the fact that it doesn’t ease newcomers into it’s story. Due to this the characters are already far in their story lines so development is almost completely missing in this latest installment. The only piece of development we really get is in terms of the feud between the two families; though that’s more a story development than a character one. Both groups of sisters hardly change throughout this story, and while a tiny bit of blame falls on me for not playing all the titles available to me, most of this is due to the fact that a lot of the series in not something we can get our hands on. Though I don’t know how much the development of these characters can help them. The current personalities of these characters are really boring; instead of coming off as comical overly sarcastic characters, I leave with little to no impression of the four girls. I don’t care about what events unfold in their path, or how they overcome it. I feel no connection to these people at all, and to me they hold no weight in the overall story. I also have no idea what the motivations are for anyone in the cast; I understand that the families want to rid the world of the other, but for what reason? Also why is the green haired woman doing what she’s doing? Why do our main characters want to save a world that already seems lost? The characters raise so many question and none get answers; it’s a little aggravating, but at the same time I wasn’t expecting much. Could I have come to like these characters if I had the opportunity to play more of the series? Anything is possible, but I think my opinion would probably stay the same. This is main due to the attitude and personality, but a little of the blame can also go towards the use of visuals in this game. I told myself that this shouldn’t be taken seriously, but some wouldn’t seriousness wouldn’t hurt.

Now usually when it comes to the Onechanbara series, you’ll probably one of many that knows it for it’s odd use of visuals. The series spars no expense to push the unusual factor. Even the CD itself has it’s fair share of racy visuals.

What words can be said about this game? From the main characters, to the villains you face; the visuals are something all right. What that something is I’m a little unsure, but something. Now as I was playing the game I thought to myself; why does Onechanbara need to look like this? Why do the characters need to wear skimpy clothes as they hunt the undead. I know this is Japan we’re talking about, and sexual content is something vastly different from her in the USA, or elsewhere. Yet at no point is this ever called to attention. In all the other games I’ve played, with some degree of sexual content, all the random moments were called to attention in someway. In Onechanbara there is no reason for these people to where clothes like this. It’s not for sex appeal, and it doesn’t feel like fan service. For a game that advertises girls in bikini’s, the outfits given to the girls just feel really out of place to me. Though that aside, the visuals get weirder still. The most tame of the visuals are the scenery; each stage is a rather small area to roam around and fight in. All of them are just bland arena’s with little to nothing to them. All the random stuff comes from the character and enemy design. If you thought you’d only fight your average zombie, you’re in for quite the ride.

If you told me I’d be fighting disembodied legs on the top of a cruiser; I don’t think I’d instantly doubt you, but at the same time I don’t think I’d accept this at face value. Why stop there though, how about werewolves or dragons? Maybe some scorpion centaur thing? Just to be clear this all takes place on earth; you venture across the globe for different mission. I know demons exist, but they feel a lot more out of place here than they should be. I know this isn’t a triple A title, but when you see your character in action, or move in the slightest everything looks a blurry and it feels like frames might be running slower than intended at times. It’s not great and a lot of the game looks gross. Then there’s the music; Onechanbara has this very awkward soundtrack. I don’t know the direction Tamsoft was aiming for when making the music for this game. A lot of the tracks were these weird electronic-rock songs with a some what aggressive female vocalist accompanying it. None of the music really fits with the game play and while I remember some of the tracks, it’s not for the right reasons. Here a little taste of what the OST has.

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It’s not all that great of an OST; the vocal sound really poorly recorded and the instruments don’t always go together. The one thing I can actually say about this is that I surprisingly didn’t get any sort of audio or visuals bugs throughout the game. While the gameplay wasn’t all that good, I had a rather smooth time through considering glitches and the like. They are certainly there; for me the biggest problem was the gameplay. No matter how serious the characters or story might be, the gameplay wasn’t fleshed out as well as it should have been.

When I was going into Onechanbara, I was entering into a game I thought was broken. From what experience I had with the game, from the videos I’ve seen, it had it’s fair share of problems. Terrible AI, bugs and glitches, you name it; though I didn’t really have much in the bug side of things, controlling allies and fighting enemies is where my troubles were present. A hack and slash should feel smooth to operate; they should be relatively fast when necessary, and simple to control. Onechanbara is not this; the game felt really heavy and clunky. My hits never felt like they did much, and how you do specific actions isn’t made all that clear. The AI is another problem in the game; most of the enemies will move to surround you, which is fine, however every enemy acts as if they have some sort of immunity to you. There’s no stagger to both your characters or the enemies, or at least stagger feels a little to inconsistent at times. So you don’t know if you’re doing damage, or taking it as well. Those no clear indication you’re dying until you’re basically dead either so that makes things a lot worse.

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Here’s a video if watching if you’d rather see for yourself. Onechanbara has a lot of systems to it that are not all that easy to remember. Cleaning your weapon, sub weapons, tag fighting, etc. I went most of the game never cleaning my weapon because it’s so slow to do and I hardly noticed the meter. When it comes down to it, the game just feels terrible as a whole; is it playable? Sure, a lot easier and manageable than Bound by Flame, but nothing to write home about.

Overall I’d give Onechanbara Z2 Chaos a 3 out of 10, it’s not good; however, for me it felt less aggravating to play than other games I’ve played. It didn’t really leave me with any sort of negative or positive impression of it. I felt more like I was doing homework than playing a game. It wasn’t something I particularly found enjoyable, but at the same time I wasn’t begging it to end either. It’s not good, not average, it’s definitely a bad game. Though in the end it’s all about the perception leading into it that changed my outlook on the game as a whole. The story, characters, gameplay, all of it is terrible. I don’t recommend this game to anyone, and never plan to play another in the series. I’ve had my fill.

That will do it for the reviews this month; thanks for sticking with me to the end. I’ll be posting soon what’s to come next month, but until then, go do something fun for crying out loud. We’ve had enough crap, right?

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