#I wish I had posted this together with the last one

[leiascully]

post all things love confession?

Please enjoy way too many words of my 800th fic to be posted to AO3 based on a weird timeline where "all things" is the first and only time they've slept together (okay it's not that weird but it's weird for me since I believe in the Season of Secret Sex).

“I’ve been thinking about what you said,” Scully said abruptly.

Mulder leaned back in his chair. “That could cover a multitude of sins.”

She gave him a brief smile. “I suppose what I mean to say is I’ve been thinking about what I said.”

“I’m all ears.” He laced his hands behind his head. “Talk to me, Scully.”

“The choices we’ve made,” she said, and then fell silent. He waited for a moment, but he’d seen that look before. She was lost in the labyrinth of her thoughts. He understood. It was a strange conversation to have under the fluorescent lights of their basement office. They saved most of their emotional communications for the shadows, as if the words they said at midnight couldn’t survive after the sunshine.

“The ones that brought us here,” he prompted.

She seemed to come back to herself. “Yes. I just wanted you to know that I don’t regret my choices, Mulder.”

He discarded three or four witty remarks. There was something about her face that deterred him, some tension between her eyebrows or at the corner of her mouth. He couldn’t explain how or why he understood her; he knew her by heart.

Now she was the one waiting for his response. “That’s comforting to hear,” he said at last. “We’ve been through the wringer, so to speak.”

“I mean, there are small choices I regret,” she said, a spark of humor in her eye. “Getting tuna salad instead of a French dip yesterday. Not buying stock in IBM. But the big things, the choices that brought me to you, the choices that brought us here… I don’t regret those.”

“I’d choose you every time,” he said carefully.

“I know,” she said. She blew out a breath. “God, it seems so silly.”

“What does?”

She gestured vaguely between them. “I choose you. You choose me. It seems, I don’t know, shallow in some way? To put words to it.”

“I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying.” He shifted in his chair, tipping forward.

She sighed. “Maybe I don’t either.”

He was quiet for a long minute. “It is good to know you don’t regret your choices. I wasn’t sure, the other night. When I, uh, woke up alone.”

“It wasn’t about that, Mulder,” she said, looking away.

“It felt a little regretful,” he pushed.

When she looked back, the blue of her eyes was the ocean and he was drowning. “I wanted so badly to wake up in your arms, Mulder. I was afraid I wanted it more than anything else in my life. It’s all I’ve thought about the last few days. What it was like. What happens next.”

“Oh,” he said. He had the sense that the rest of the world had fallen away. There was only him and Scully, only this room.

“Every time Skinner asks me a question, I’m terrified about what I might say accidentally,” she admitted in a wry voice. “I’m sure he suspects, but I find myself so possessive of our privacy.”

“For all that we’re usually alone, it does seem like we’re lacking in privacy,” he agreed. “Skinner may not be the main offender, but he has been known to hang around the water cooler, if you know what I mean.”

“I’d prefer that Skinner not join us in the bedroom.” She smirked at him a little.

“I wasn’t aware that was an option.” He looked at her, relishing the glint in her eyes. “Scully, I’m glad to hear you don’t wish it hadn’t happened, but I’m not entirely sure what we’re talking about.”

She sighed. “Mulder, I’ve put my life on the line for you and you’ve done the same for me, more times than I can count.”

He nodded slowly. “Our lives. Our jobs. Our reputations. I’d do it again.”

“We’ve been to the ends of the earth together. We’ve seen things that no one else has even dreamed of. We’ve proved our devotion to each other, over and over.”

“I like to think we have.” His body was tingling. Some sort of nervous system overload, she would tell him. Or maybe a heart attack. But there was no interrupting Scully when she got into a groove like this. It took her a while to build up the momentum and he didn’t want to derail her.

“After all that we’ve been through, it feels almost like an afterthought.”

“What does?”

She almost flinched and then seemed to steel herself. “Saying ‘I love you’.”

Everything stopped, including his heart. “Ah,” he said.

She hunched into herself. Scully got small when she was sad. It stung him. “I did expect a slightly different reaction.”

“It’s just that you’re right,” he said, leaning toward her over the desk. “Everything we’ve been through, you’d think it would be deeper than words. But still, hearing ‘I love you’… it shifts things between us.”

“The same thing they put on the chocolate box,” she said softly.

“How about that,” he said in the same quiet voice. They sat gazing at each other. He would have sworn the stale air of the basement smelled like spring, a breath of damp earth and flowers and beginnings. “But you know you didn’t actually say it.”

She ducked her head and grinned. “Of course you’d notice.”

“I’m a GS-12, Scully. They don’t hand that out for nothing.” He waited.

“I think it counts,” she objected.

“If me saying it after the Queen Mary doesn’t count, that doesn’t count,” he said.

“You were concussed!” She frowned at him. “I thought it was the painkillers talking.”

“You knew it wasn’t,” he said indulgently.

“I hoped it wasn’t,” she corrected. “That isn’t the same thing.”

“You make me a whole person,” he said. “My constant. My touchstone.”

“Panic,” she said. “And head trauma again.”

He shook his head. “I meant it.”

“Say it again,” she said.

“I love you,” he said without hesitation. “What did they say in that awful movie? ‘No ifs, ands, or bees’.”

She narrowed her eyes. Her mouth was tight, but it twitched up at the corners. “You didn’t happen to hit your head this morning, did you?”

“Next time stay over and you can monitor my morning routines,” he said. “No, I didn’t. But you’re free to run your hands through my hair to check for goose eggs. Your preferred method of diagnosis, I believe.”

She ducked her head, chuckling a little. “I love you,” she said.

He smiled at her. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“I love you,” she said again, with wonder in her voice. “I love you.” This time, she got choked up at the end, a light in her eyes brighter than he’d ever seen.

“Hey,” he said gently, getting up from the desk and going to her. He knelt by her table and cradled her face in his hands. She cupped her hands over his. “Scully, hey.”

“I love you,” she said, and now there were tears in her eyes.

“It’s all right,” he said. “I love you too.”

She stifled a sob. “I’m sorry,” she said. “It’s a little overwhelming.”

“Me too,” he said, and eased up to kiss her forehead. “No wonder we kept it under wraps for so long.”

She sighed. He thumbed a tear off her cheek. “God, we’re so stupid.”

“We had our reasons.”

“Mulder, we tried to make a baby together,” she said in an almost plaintive voice. “Who did we think we were fooling?”

He shrugged. “I didn’t say our reasons were valid.”

“I thought it wouldn’t matter, to say those three words,” she said. “After everything we’ve been through. I mean, how many hours in the hospital, holding vigil at each other’s bedsides. How many dinners for two in diners and motel rooms. A hundred times that I said it without saying it.”

“A thousand times.”

“That’s why I left,” she said. Her lips trembled. “I wanted to say it so badly.”

“What were you afraid of?”

“I don’t know,��� she said. “That after all this time, it wasn’t good enough, I suppose. Or that the tension between us lately meant it was the wrong choice. Or that it wasn’t what you wanted.”

“Scully, I’ve always wanted you,” he said in a low voice. “I stood on Skyland Mountain and felt my heart rip out of my chest. Nothing that happened between us could ever disappoint me. Especially not what happened the other night.”

She looked into his eyes and nodded. There it was again between them, the understanding that was more than words. He felt the strength of their connection filling him, sustaining him.

“I wouldn’t mind doing it again,” he hazarded. “Maybe even regularly. Indefinitely, if you could fit it into your schedule.”

“I’ll pencil you in,” she said. She tugged at him and he rose, pulling her into his arms as he stood. She fit perfectly against him, the way she always had. He kissed the top of her head.

“Now what?” she said into his chest.

“I don’t know,” he said. “I’m not really sure how this works. Haven’t had great role models. Maybe we make it up as we go along. We’ve made it this far.”

“Indefinitely,” she said, turning her face up to him. “That sounds a little bit like forever.”

“A lot of things sound like forever when you say them,” he told her.

“Don’t start quoting my senior thesis again,” she teased.

“That’s when I knew you had an affinity for extreme possibilities,” he said. “All I had to do was pull back the curtain.”

“That easy, huh?” She smiled at him and he grinned back. “Speaking of easy, can I buy you dinner?”

“Why, Agent Scully, I thought you’d never ask.” He released her and pulled her jacket off the coat rack, holding it while she shrugged into it. “What’s your pleasure?”

She looked up at him with a sly expression. “I thought we could order in. God knows the delivery guy knows the way to my apartment by now.”

“He definitely thinks we’re dating.” Mulder shrugged on his own jacket.

“Well,” Scully said. “He’s right, I suppose.”

He reached for her hand. “Yeah. We’re dating. Indefinitely.”

“Indefinitely,” she agreed, squeezing his hand, and it sounded like forever and ever.

[charles-smith-pillow-princess]

Part 1 of @noshirdalal's answer to the following prompt (requested by me [@rockscanfly] for @kaphzzz's birthday). I’m posting on her behalf because tumblr has had her account wrongfully suspended for about two weeks now.

In response to the question: You’ve mentioned that there are things that Charles left unsaid to Arthur. On behalf of Kaph and in celebration of her birthday, what are some things Charles might have said to Arthur on their last ride together?

Transcript Below:

I missed your birthday? Aw man! Happy belated Birthday, Kaph, and I’m so grateful to Rocks for letting me know! January 25th (editor’s note: not actually Kaph’s birthday. I was very dehydrated/tired from 10 days working outside in the desert and got the date wrong. Whoops! Sorry Kaph!)? Clearly an auspicious day [laughter]. If you had been in camp, you would have woken up and there would have been a blueberry scone and hot coffee waiting for you outside your tent. Charles would not have let you know it was him or left a note or anything he just would have set it outside for you to find. Charles also wishes you a very happy belated birthday. 

[Nala, Noshir’s dog, is huffing at the camera, asking for her papa’s attention] God dang, literally as soon as I start talking! 

So, for your birthday Rocks made a request [laughs]. In a previous post I talked about Charles probably having misgivings about things he didn’t say when he had the chance while he was on that ride with Arthur. And so Rocks asked, ‘well what would he have said?’. Oh, man [laughs]. Rocks you’re always asking me the cool but involved questions. 

So, here’s the deal Kaph [sighs]. I know that you’re a big fan of Charthur. And I think that any romance option is completely, completely wonderful and I support them all. So I’m gonna do this from a Charthur perspective. I know someone out there is gonna take this and run with it as like, you know, ‘Noshir says, you know, that Charles and Arthur are gay!’. And if they are? Great! And if they’re not? Great! But for you I will try to tell this [as] if Charles does have feelings for Arthur. 

I think Charles would probably take some time—depends on how long this horse ride is [giggles]—to share some of the regrets he’s had along the way. Moments when he could have come to some sort of resolution or sort of peace and didn’t know that he had limited time. I think there would have been plenty of those moments in his life. I think if Charles found the courage and in some way past relationships came up—Charles would probably share that he’d been in love when he was young. 

And, you know, like, was all in. A ‘fool for love’. And that when the chips were down and he desperately needed the person that he loved to be there, that he bailed. Be it out of fear or what, self interest, but I think that was really crushing for him. I don’t think that Charles talks about it a lot [Noshir pauses to toss a ball for Nala]. I don’t think Charles talks about it a lot but I think thats one of the reasons that he keeps so many people at arm’s length. 

I think Charles feels things very deeply and loves very hard and for that reasons tries not to put himself into situations where that could become a risk. I think that a lot of times people that he cares about he actually makes more distance than with people that he doesn’t. And I think he might confess that to Arthur.

‘Cause I think if there’s anyone in this world that he’d want to make sure didn’t misunderstand him, it’d be Arthur. And I think oftentimes with people that you’re close with, they know. But knowing how little time Arthur may have left there are some things that Charles would not leave to chance. 

And I don’t think Charles, even in this moment, could bring himself to come out and say, you know, ‘Arthur I love you.’ It's just not, not in his way. But he might in a very kind of—[talking to Nala] nope, out! Good girl—but I think he might in a very kind of awkward way…maybe tentative is a better way to put it. You know, just let Arthur know, like, ‘You know, you never have to ask if I’ll ride with you. Just tell me where we’re goin’’. 

I think that may be as close to a confession of love that Charles would ever make. 

[hex800020]

Fic Rec (GEN):

Most of these are Jason or Tim-centric (bc I play favorites), and almost all (if not all) are tagged angst/comf and happy end.

The ones with a 🩷 are my faves.

Series:

Displacement — GEN • Ongoing series (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Highly recommend reading this in order.”

How Jason makes his way back to the family and, later on, how Damian joins.

Shutterbug — GEN • Series (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim makes a living “selling” intel and crucial clues to Batman—until one day, he gets caught in the middle when his parents’ criminal activities come to light.

Jason & Dick:

how lonely to be something that nothing wants to kill — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Jason passively tried to off himself, but Dick got there in time.

🩷The guilt never left, you know — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

While patrolling Crime Alley, Nightwing finds Red Hood being tortured. He saves him and takes him to one of his safe houses, but the newspapers pinned to the walls stir up some old wounds.

Sickening Succession — GEN • 2 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “If they just said what they were thinking, 80% of their problems would disappear.”

Two scenes:

• Dick is down bad, and Jason!Robin helps him

• RH!Jason is down bad, and Dick helps him (fever, hallucinations, the works)

Reciprocation — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick calls Jason because he got food poisoning and needs help. (From the Displacement series.)

citrusy sweetness — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick peels oranges for Jason because Jason sucks at it.

Under The Shadows — GEN • 8 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Loved the drama and the resolution, but some parts were kinda meh.”

Jason is going feral through Gotham looking for revenge, but he doesn’t want to hurt Tim. Fear toxin gets involved. Dick attempts a self-killing

Two Years Dead — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Grave Pretender but from Dick’s POV.

Two Robins in the Hand — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick and Jason turn back into their younger Robin selves.

I’d give you my lungs (so you could breathe) — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “God, I just want world peace and for everyone to be happy.”

Dick randomly shows up at Jason’s place one day, and Jason realizes there’s a lot of stuff he doesn’t remember from his past—like how they once went skiing together.

Glue the wound, my suture’s split — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick finds out Red Hood is Jason.

Jason & Tim:

🩷 Red Hood’s Guide to Adoption — GEN • 46 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I’m gonna vomit hearts.”

Red Hood tries to kill Tim for being “corrupt” (Tim is a fresh “orphan teenage CEO”) but ends up getting attached and starts looking after him like a little brother. (Later, he makes up with Dick and B)

And I Will Be Your Safety — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Who hasn’t kidnapped their sibling at least once?”

Tim is overworking himself (CEO life) and straight-up asks Jason to kidnap him.

🩷 Robin is Magic — GEN • 3 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I cried like 100 times.”

RH meets civilian Tim (photographer mode), then later attacks the Tower and realizes that Tim (the photographer) is actually Robin/Timothy Drake.

The Moment After — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s the ending.”

Part 2 of Robin is Magic

A Meditation on Railroads — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s good, has some slow parts, but the last two chapters are gold.”

Tim’s dad leaves him in Atlanta, 800 miles away from Gotham, so he just starts walking because he thinks no one wants him… Jason finds out and tags along.

Middle Children Must Unionize — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I wish it had another chapter.”

Jason realizes no one gives a damn about Tim, so he fixes the problem himself.

Do Not, Under Any Circumstances, Wake Him Up — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Robin!Tim falls asleep, and RH won’t let anyone wake him up (they’re in a warehouse where RH is planning some raids).

Finding the Line — GEN • 36 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Some plot moments are amazing, but it gets kinda heavy at times.”

Jason (learning to control the Pit) notices Tim has bruises (post-Tower, post-recently deciding not to kill).

Tbh, there are like four different arcs—at one point, Tim has selective mutism.

Green-Eyed Monster — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)“It’s good, but we go from pure hatred to eternal love in like five seconds.”

RH finds his replacement (Robin!Tim) in Crime Alley after he got hit with Scarecrow’s fear gas… friend or foe? (Part 2 of An Excuse.)

Displacement — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim almost kills a man, but Jason makes sure he is the one to do it so Tim doesn’t have to carry the guilt. (From the Displacement series.)

Aftershock — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I love how Tim is even more messed up than me.”

Tim is deep in PTSD mode after shooting someone and ruining the “no killing” truce between Jason and Bruce. (From the Displacement series.)

Tourniquet — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I love how Tim is even more messed up than me x2.”

Tim realizes Jason, Dick, and Bruce are getting along well enough that he isn’t really needed anymore. (From the Displacement series.)

🩷 Combustion — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)“10000/10, I’d read this forever.”

Jason gets hit with fear toxin and ends up trapped underground in a vault with Tim… no signal, no one knows where they are. (From the Displacement series.)

Battered But Loved — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim tells Jason he’s happy he’s alive—because literally no one else has said it since he came back.

Buttercup — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim gets buried alive, and only Jason hears his calls for help.

Bruce Trying to Be a Good Dad:

Don’t Look Back, Them Days Are Gone — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Jason returns to the manor with Damian, and Talia tries to kill him for kidnapping her baby bird.

A Grave Filled With Books — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Oh, I’m gonna cry.”

Batman is late to patrol with Red Hood because Bruce was at a parent-teacher meeting… Jason realizes Bruce has changed.

Collar Bones Begin to Crack — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Batman and Robin!Damian return to the Cave just as Jason is working on a case… brings back some memories.

🩷 Fallback — GEN • 4 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Dick yelling at a sick, childish Jason is peak comedy and comfort.”

Jason has an absolute nightmare of a night—on the verge of hypothermia, multiple injuries… and Batman finds him. (From the Displacement series.)

An Excuse — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s so cute.”

Tim gets hit with fear gas and takes the chance to ask for affection without seeming weird or childish.

Aces High and Cigarettes — GEN • 2 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s so sweet… and concerning.”

Jason hires people to kidnap and bury him alive… sort of a shock therapy thing.

Bury Me Face Down — GEN • 7 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Every time Jason dies, he wakes up in his grave (as his 15-year-old self) and tries to do things differently.

🩷 Five Stages of Immeasurable Anguish — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I have to recommend this, it’s a gem.”

Jason wakes up buried alive (again), but this time he has comms with the Batfam. Who’s panicking more? (The one-shot.)

Grave Pretender — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “LMAO, this is amazing, they’re all dramatic as hell.” “It’s Under the shadows , but a comedy.”

Jason, full theater kid mode, pretends to be his just-crawled-out-of-the-grave self to haunt his family

Other Recs:

A Bespoke Tuxedo His Only Armor — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s angsty but cute.”

Tim gets shot by Damian while they’re both in civilian mode and is lowkey on his last breath.

Tim Drake Spoiled Brat. (I’m sorry dad) — GEN • 16/? (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Bro, is therapy illegal in Gotham??”

Tim dies at 17 and reincarnates into his younger self. This time, he tries to save the Bats from most of their trauma so they can actually be a family… but he is screwed because he thinks everything is his fault or some shit

🩷 Burning Ashes - The Rise of a Phoenix – GEN • 10/20 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Only downside? It’s not finished.”

Jason reincarnates (as what seems to be Dick’s bastard kid with some random lady), and at five years old, he kills the Joker. Batman catches him and takes him in… but Jason remembers everything, is pissed about it, and also super traumatized (bc, y’know, he has the psyche of a five-year-old)

Cards on the table – GEN • 30 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “This is hilarious.”

Tim’s parents faked their deaths and just ditched him, so, in his totally mature 16-year-old wisdom, he starts scamming Gotham’s elite by pretending to be a “psychic” (he just stalks people and makes probability guesses based on the profiles he built on them).

The Waynes hire him, and dude just keeps digging himself deeper (he knows their identities)

“When Tim went out to do what he liked to call research, but what was probably legally classified as stalking, he had to be careful” (Ch. 4)

[oceansoul001]

Couple of random thoughts regarding KCD2 last conversation with Hans.

[Spoilers!!!]

1. You can have this conversation either still in Suchdol (after talking to Sir Hanush) or in the Devil's Den post credits. They don't differ beside last topic ("What are your plans now?") that is removed if you choose the latter.

2. Generally there is not much of a difference between romance and non-romance paths. Romanced Hans tells you everything that the non-romanced does, just adds a few unique sentences. You can probably notice switch of tone in "What are we going to do about the wedding" topic, for the romanced lines: "I'm not sure what to do... after what happened, you know...? I mean... me and you... I suppose we'll just have to wait and see how things turn out..." I find this reaction very believable given the situation, I recon they both need some time to sort things in their heads, as the ongoing siege/bringing reinforcements didn't leave them much time and space for reflection. So I am very okay with them not discussing the topic further at this point. And, I know this might sound strange, but I also really like that there are no love confessions at this point, I greatly dislike it when games throw them at me after literally one night spent together with someone.

BUT. Directly after this part comes the non-romance part where Hans worries about his bride being ugly and then proceeds to talk about naming his son after Henry, and I don't know... I mean, yeah, we all are aware of the fact that Hans most probably still has to get married, and have an heir, and it does not matter at all whether something happened between him & Henry, or not, but is this really the thing he would casually say at this moment...? Okay, maybe he would, it's Hans. But what is even more bizarre to me is my Henry, who is happily babbling as if nothing has changed at all, even though like a minute ago he was this awkward mess thanking Hans for "the encouragement". So what I'm trying to say is, I would prefer at least for Henry to act/respond differently in the romanced version and remain more awkward throughout this convo. But maybe I'm overthinking this! 😅

3. Another difference in the romance path occurs when discussing Hans' injury, as only in this version Henry asks if he can take a look at the wound later, and I think it is so sweet. Very minor detail, but I love it. ❤️

4. The thing that I definitely don't like is asking Hans about his talk with Hanush, and Hans responding with "You don't need to know everything", like??? My guy. Please. You've just shared with me probably the most intimate and secretive moment OF YOUR LIFE, and now you don't want to tell me some shit about Hanush, even though it is not even a secret and like everyone in Rattay already knows (your own words!). I don't get it at all, why in the romance path this still requires a speech check and why is Hans so weird about not telling me "everything", even though mere hours ago he was ready to die from grief if I don't come back 😭

5. Speaking of dying, romanced Hans can say the following at the beginning of your conversation: "I'm glad nothing happened to you. That would have killed me", but it only happens if Sam does not survive. So not in my game, as I would never leave my brother behind. Hans can also admit that he was jealous of Sam, which for me was very clear during the game, but also under the condition that Sam does not survive.

6. Last, but not least - I wish we could have another conversation with romanced Hans after couple in-game days pass, after we both have had a chance to collect our thoughts. Nothing groundbreaking, just something short and sweet, and you know, maybe get the possibility to share a kiss in our room at the Devil's Den when we want... I know it might sound greedy, or silly, after all we've just got this perfect, almost unreal relationship at all, but nothing can stop me from dreaming. 🥹

Happy to hear your thoughts on the subject! ❤️

[anneapocalypse]

Been thinking lately about aromantic Minfilia.

She is, as many of you know, one of my favorite FFXIV characters, I have many feelings about her, I now have not one but two Warriors of Light who fall in love with her very quickly. Ariane never confesses her feelings because she's a coward (affectionate and derogatory), while Merlwaen goes for it and they have a romance, while it lasts... but I can't see it not ending the same way. There's no world where Minfilia hears Hydaelyn's call and says No; there's no world where Merlwaen's love overrides that, no matter how real that love is. Even if Merl were to pick her up and physically carry her out of the Sil'dihn watercourse I think that would somehow still be the end and a part of Minfilia would not forgive her for that overriding of her agency even if she never knew why it was so world-rending. And even when I try to imagine an AU where Minfilia returns to mortal life post-Shadowbringers and becomes the third corner of a triad with Ariane and Urianger, both of whom love her dearly and would probably welcome that, there is something a little sideways about it, something that doesn't quite fit.

Minfilia chooses Hydaelyn and will always choose Hydaelyn and for me, that's a core part of her character I can't undo without fundamentally changing her character, whatever my issues with how it's written.

And now I'm starting to think, hey, what if it's not just that Minfilia's devotion to Hydaelyn overrides everything else? I've increasingly felt that I like it better if Ariane's feelings actually were unrequited. (She'll never know that for certain, but I can.) And what if Minfilia actually just... doesn't feel the same way Merlwaen feels? Maybe she thinks she does, initially. Merlwaen is kind and loving and a protector and of course there's a bit of hero worship going on there as well. It feels good to be loved by her, and Minfilia's spent so many years focused on her Echo support group and the salvation of Eorzea and has little experience with romantic relationships (also they've never been a priority for her) and the novelty of this is as exciting as anything else. And Minfilia's so full of love--love for the world, love for Hydaelyn, love for her friends. It's easy to say she loves Merlwaen and mean it.

Just... maybe it's not that kind of love.

And I like what this adds to what's inevitably going to happen after the banquet, because it's not just Merlwaen learning the first of several brutal lessons about how she can't save everyone. It's not just "my gf dumped me for God, harsh but fair." It's that Merlwaen and Minfilia's ideas of what they are to one another, and what they are together, are fundamentally mismatched, and that mismatch would have eventually shown itself even if the banquet had never happened.

Minfilia does what she does out of love, fundamentally. It's simply a love that's incompatible with what Merlwaen wants, and in a broader sense it's incompatible with a love that places one person above all else, romantic or otherwise--something that's hard for Thancred to understand too, I think, despite the love between them being familial and not romantic. And I don't see the same kind of anguish in Minfilia making these choices that I see in, say, Urianger making his own difficult decisions. In the end, when pressed, she can say firmly and with confidence, You can wish my love was of a different kind, but that is not for you to decide.

[pie-bean]

please rank all the peppy bunnies, i’m curious - quenepa

Oh man, a lot of people have probably seen that I like a lot peppy bunnies so this is going to be really hard because I like them all.

Starting from least favorite:

Dotty is very cute and I like her black and white design with the teal ear details. My latest interaction with her was the last time I played the original game not too long ago and she was quite mean to me. >:(

Bunnie has a very warm and nice color palette that makes me think of apples. I know a lot of people find her eyes a bit unsettling but I don't mind them (they also kinda look like apple pits when you think about it, maybe that explains my impression of her). I've never had her on any of my islands or towns.

Chrissy is iconic but it's hard for me to invite her because I also need to have her live with her sister around. I wish you could get them both at once! On her own she's great but I've never had her and I have stronger feelings about the other bunnies.

Carmen was one of my main villagers back in the day when I played Pocket Camp a ton (2019?). I love her colors a lot, she reminds me of mint chocolate and she's quite stylish in general (giving her mint colored glasses looks really good!). She looks like she could be a very fashionable coworker in an office (oh and she definitely has gossip about everyone, look at that smug look of hers)

Gabi is one of my dreamies right now! I haven't had her on any of my islands or towns but she's adorable and feels like she would work great with some of the rural areas I'm working on. She's a bit obscure on social media compared to a lot of villagers but I know I will love having her on my island. If I find her during a villager hunt I'm getting her!

Bonbon is really cute and her cool brown and pink colors look so good. I like bangs on villagers too (controversial maybe?) so I like her hairstyle too. I like that she has a bit of sisterly villager vibes too – she has attitude! The sandals are neat too, very summery. I loved having her on my island.

Pippy is so cute and she looks like she could be a character in a vintage picture book. She has such good colors. The freckles are so adorable too (you might spot a trend here lol). I had her on Toe Bean 2021 and she kept hanging out with my favorite cat villager Tabby. They were so cute walking around and doing activities together. 🥺

Ruby is my favorite villager alongside Molly. I've made like a million posts with her and her space theme is perfect. I also love her expressions including her standard blank neutral stare (she's just like me). I know her stare and red eyes look scary to some people but I like that she's a bit weird, kinda alien looking. One design detail I found super cute is that she has sliightly pink ears and feet that with New Horizons' fur textures makes her look like she's made out of cotton candy. Anyway, it's hard to describe in words but she makes me happy! I want to invite her soon – Toe Bean isn't the same without her.

[continent-of-wild-endeavor]

It's been a couple of weeks, but I haven't posted here: We finally had to let our old man Hemmie go. He was a Good Boy through it all, and almost made it to 16. It was time - he'd been declining slowly for a long time, and needed a lot of help, and then his various problems came together in a way that it wasn't fair to try to fix - but still it's been very sad to lose him.

He had a vet appointment that day anyway, so he got to go out easy, with all the good drugs and on one of his favorite beds I brought from home. I just wish he'd felt well enough for me to spoil him with hamburgers one last time, or that I'd let him sniff in the parking lot longer before we went in - or, mostly, that J had been in town and got to say goodbye. Hemmie was his dog, from before we even met.

Enjoy these pictures of a dog living a good, long life. He liked comfy beds, basking in the sun, group adventures, everything edible, and for all of us to be together. Once, when J & I were first dating, Hemmie tried to jump out a car window as J dropped me off at my apartment, and I realized Hemmie thought I was part of the family and shouldn't be separated. See my blog header for what him & Freya had better be up to, running free in whatever doggy afterlife may be. Neither of them could run like that in their last days & months, but that pic is up there for a reason; a very good memory.

Look at him fly 🖤

[siriusxmunofficial]

I wrote this a while ago but I don't think I'm good at writing so I haven't posted it yet

“it is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply.” Regulus said as one of his final words to james before he left for the cave "Why's that moonlight?" Is all James asked, trying to understand his lover "It's a blessing so I can understand the world around me but it's a curse because no one understands me like I understand them" "Then teach me" "What?" Regulus asks, confused "Teach me to understand"

“I can try” “i want to be great or nothing” Regulus said two hours later when he was trying to sleep “why’s that?” “I want to go out with a bang” and right before bed “i feel as if im made to understand but not to be understood’ James said one late night with regulus, little do they know it’s their last night together “i was made to be understood but not to understand” regulus said before kissing him softly “we can learn how to be understood and understand together” (cut three weeks later) James is sobbing on the floor wishing Regulus could hold him, but that’s an impossible wish, as Regulus had indeed gone out with a bang, James never got to understand his lover, his moonlight, his life. His last conversation with him was meaningful but he felt sad, he never got to fully understand.

SO SORRY IF THIS ISN'T GOOD 💗

[specialagentartemis]

In my own Tanker hc I have never actually written, Snake gives Otacon the option to back out. Snake is hurt and feels betrayed (he has a history of his CO on the other side of the radio sending him into dangerous situations and lying through their teeth about what he’ll find there. That wasn’t supposed to be Otacon, too. He was supposed to be separate from all that, they were supposed to be partners and peers who chose this jointly.) On top of being hypothermic and half-drowned. But he’s also empathetic, and deeply responsible, and Otacon is clearly freaking out, and Snake offers him an out. Snake offers him the option to walk away. Snake says, if you take point on PR damage control, if you tell them I cracked, that I went rogue, that I did this on my own and you were asleep in your own apartment this whole time and had no idea, you can get away from this. You can get a regular software job, have a normal life.

But it would mean no more activism, no more Philanthropy. And no more Snake. Snake has to disappear, and Otacon has to face the press and disavow him. Snake’s life is pretty ruined, but Otacon’s doesn’t have to be.

And Otacon certainly has a complex about drowning and responsibility. And last time this happened, he walked away from the whole mess, and has blamed himself ever since. (Yes, the PW timeline indicates he was 16 or 17 at the time; he was in no way actually responsible for Julie Danzinger’s abuse or Huey’s murder-suicide by pool, but all retcons aside, MGS2 makes it clear he holds himself to blame for it all.)

But Otacon is facing a repeat of the worst moment of his life: he has—for real, this time—just had a significant hand in permanently ruining Snake’s life, and Snake is still giving him the option to walk away. Build a normal life without all this Metal Gear stuff. And partially it is the fact that we’ve seen, time and time again, that Snake is honestly incredibly sympathetic and forgiving of people who have hurt him (maybe because he sees himself as having hurt too many people to have any right to hold grudges; he clearly still hurts over Gray Fox). And partially… maybe this event has taught him, again, that he can’t ever expect anyone else to have his back. He can’t ever really trust that the people he cares most about won’t betray him. Big Boss did, Gray Fox did, Master Miller did, Roy Campbell did, and now Otacon did and maybe it’s easier to go back to being alone in Alaska with his dogs.

So post-Tanker has to be a real choice, and a hard one. Otacon is scared, and it is so tempting to make this Not His Problem Anymore and try to forget. He won’t forget about it, of course—he still hasn’t forgotten about, or stopped blaming himself for, or stopped wishing for resolution and absolution for, something that happened when he was in high school and was not his fault—but he can be safe. He can be normal.

And he has to make the choice to say, no. We’re in this together. I’m committed to the work we do to stop the proliferation of nuclear weapons across the world. I’m committed to stopping Ocelot and whatever he’s up to. I’m committed to you, and to us, and I won’t let you take the fall alone.

And this is very scary because it means accepting becoming an internationally wanted terrorist, he will never be safe again, but this is already gonna be Snake’s future and if they jump wholly into this together they can keep each other safe and keep doing what they set out to do. And they can do it together. I don’t want it to be a natural outcome of what happened, I want it to be a conscious choice Otacon makes to take responsibility and step up and be brave. Terrified. Able to back out. And choosing not to. This is a choice he can’t take back either, but it’s one that will work to rectify his last one.

(I don’t think Snake and Otacon are In Love as yet. The affection is there, though, the closeness between them is growing, they’re both sorta starting to think “maybe…?” and that’s one of the reasons this hurts so much. And when Otacon commits to following Snake down despite being fully aware of the clear and intense danger of the choice he is making, is when it really changes between them, I think.)

I do love Tanker Incident stuff, it’s a crystallization of so many Great Otasune Feelings… but it’s really under-acknowledged that it was, in a large part, Otacon’s fault.

He lied to Snake about his source for the Tanker tip. He broke his own rules about vetting tip sources and knew he was doing so because he lied to Snake about it until Snake was already on that tanker and it was too late. If Otacon had told Snake the truth about where he got this info about the tanker, Snake would probably have called it suspicious and not have gone. And Otacon knew that.

And their doubts were right because it was a trap, and Snake nearly died, and both of their reputations were tanked with that tanker.

Otacon wanted so badly to believe that his sister had forgiven him and wanted to contact him again that he overlooked the red flags, lied to Snake about it, and it blew up in their faces—and Snake took the brunt of the fallout.

And I want more post-Tanker Incident stuff to dig into that! The broken trust! Snake’s hurt and Otacon’s horror and shame! The fact that one bad decision is now something life-changing he can’t take back! The fact that Otacon is kinda deep down a selfish coward and he struggles against that and makes conscious choices against that every day of his life and that’s what makes him brave and heroic! And the Tanker Incident is a turning point, his biggest mistake and afterward his biggest commitment to the Cause now that Philanthropy is significantly more dangerous to be part of, and he commits anyway.

[bits-and-beasts]

some general thoughts for perfect illusion,

essentially, starscream's cover gets blown after a VERY long time, (thanks to soundwave) and he winds up having to go back to the autobots, there's a great deal of distrust, and most people -(besides ratchet and Optimus, who where both in on the situation in case of emergencies) -think its just another one of scream's tricks,

not to mention the entirety of the deception army wants him EVEN MORE dead than they already did when they just hated him for being a nuisance,

fun times all around

[crowfanity]

Just realized I never posted my Defiant Dragons/Ace Attorney pride phone case

[xxplastic-cubexx]

this cliff took more lives than i could on my own im losing it

[4x01]

landscape paintings by lynette lombard

(1954-2023)

[marshmallowgoop]

Belated 2024 parts collection!

These are a few video parts I did for a collab and a couple MEPs (Multi-Editor Projects) last year. While I would have liked to participate in more, I'm glad I managed three. It was fun to try editing with other sources than just Detective Conan—and to focus on a different aspect of DetCo than I usually do with Sonoko and Makoto in the one Conan part!

The first part (using the anime film Belle and the Wicked song "What Is This Feeling?") is one of five that I edited for the DynamIC Duos collab event at BentoVid. Participants were secretly paired up to make an AMV to the theme "Opposites," and there was a bit of a game of guessing the pairs... but I was pretty obvious because of my subtitles! Still, it was great working on this video with my collab partner Kia, and you can check out all 10 parts here!

The second part uses Cascada's "Ready for Love" and the second season of Birdy the Mighty: Decode (and all episodes save 5 and 11), with the full video here!

The third part uses The Ready Set's "Love Like Woe" and Episodes 173, 268, and 993 of Detective Conan, as well as both volumes of the Movie 23 manga and TV Special 6 (Episode One: The Great Detective Turned Small), with the full video here!

(And because English-language access to Detective Conan is limited, and I like to plug what's available when I can: there is an official English translation of the Movie 23 manga! While it's only available in Southeast Asia, MPHOnline does ship internationally, and they have a few other English-language manga titles (like Zero's Tea Time) that aren't available from Viz (and without the FUNimation dub name changes).)

[waspgrave]

i barely did any journaling last year and i'm trying to do it again and my god, this thing must think i'm so cringe. i swear i'm cool, journal, and please don't judge my handwriting either

[twopoppies]

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