#I will say that when it comes to Eddie and chirs

[makorragal-312]

Personally, I don't think Chris is gonna come back home in 8x03. But, I DO think that it's gonna be the episode where he finally reaches out to Eddie. Or at the very least starts answering his phone calls or messages.

[buddieandbrettsey188-61]

Why Buddie

Ok, so this is what I think, and you all have the right to get mad and hate me if you want, but this is what I think when it comes to Buddie.

Buddie will happen. There is no way around it this time. Don't get me wrong, when I saw Ana, I thought she was amazing, and I think she still is but is she the one for Eddie? No, I don't think so; there nothing there. I mean, besides the fact that they both know Chris and want the best for him, there is not much else there for these two. Secondly, we have Taylor in the beginning. I hated her just like most of us did, but that does not mean people don't change, and that is what has happened here. She has changed, and I would have to say for the better. First, we have her yelling at Buck, which was not fun, but then I thought about it. It hit me that he needed that just a little, you know, we all need that one person to tell us we have actually lost our shit, but that is fine, moving on so that we get the whole Chris thing. Still, I will get to that later (this might get long) ok, so close to the end of the episode, we get the "miracle," and then we get more Taylor and the sweet kiss, but I just realized that I jumped something so we will be going back in time to the roof thing. Ok, so we are at the roof, and we have that whole Buck and Taylor talking for hours thing, which I thought was cute, but I would like to begin your attention to a few things here (I don't remember word for word, but I will try my best) she says a few things that stuck with me that make her, even more, better then I thought. So she says something about waiting for things to happen, not to force it, right?

So this is what I thought about, and I think you guys might have thought it too; Eddie forced himself to go on that date with Ana. We all know it, and if you did not know it, then you felt something was not right, and that is number one, number two is the weird kissing flirting thing, which I don't know if there is a word for that but whatever, moving one we had that which again is forced an also by Eddie, I know he is trying. I give him credit for that; I really do. So now where are we? Oh yes, we are at Chris. He goes to Buck's house, and we all caught that pretty quick when we saw what shirt he was wearing and all but that mean something, but people have already talked about that, so I will not get into it. But what I will say is that even Chris sees it and understands what is happening and will do what it takes to make things work out for his dad and Buck.

Now is where the real shit goes down for me, and if you know me, you know I have talked about this a few times, but I don't mind saying it again, so here we go. Buck is the type of person who would die for the people around him. YES, he would. That is what I think Taylor was trying to say during the roof thing but let me continue. She said just to retaliate that "don't force it let it come to you." and all that mean stuff about not being a good friend was hard to hear. Still, I think he had, too. That is what I am saying. Yet, here we go; Buck NEEDS to step back not for Eddie and Chirs, not for them but himself. He would DIE for any one of those people and would not think twice about it, which is NOT healthy for him. He has a life. He might not see that at times, but he can not die or keep putting his leg out in the middle of the road for people to take hold of and do what they want with it ( that sounds wrong, but whatever you know what I mean) and to be totally honest with you that is what is happening people are taking advantage of him and guess what? Do you know who is doing most of it? I will give you a second to think about it... good, you are right, EDDIE. He knows that Buck would do anything for him. And that is good to have in a friendship but not at this level. Eddie leaves Chis in Buck's hands to go for a date that he knows is not what he want but has to do because he is "straght,"  but I think he is Bi or even Gay, but that is for a different time going back to the task at hand, I believe if we want Buddie to work we need pain and I don't mean physical pain. Still, at this point, it might be since they are so close, but I think Buck needs to step back and, like Taylor said, let the world come to him, which means that Eddie is really his universe/ world, then he will come to Buck, but Buck can't be the one running after him I mean he is not, but he is which mean Buck needs to change himself.  I know it is hard, but it is the truth Eddie is too reliant on Buck now and does not give him the recognition he deserves for literally being Chris's second fucking father. Also, I think Buck should considering hanging out with Taylor more like friends because he needs someone on his side to help him when he tries to help the Diaz boys because he will try, I know he will, and if Eddie thinks that Ana is the right fit for him then he should tell her to look after Chris and do all the things the Buck did/ does for them every day to see just how much Buck really means to them because I know for a fact that even Ana will be like "Buck does all this for you, and this is so tiring", and after a long day of Ana being Buck she is going to ask Eddie for a "thank you" or something, and it is going to hit Eddie that he never actually said "thank you" as many times as he should have for all the things Buck did for them, and if Ana has any good in her which I think she does she will be the one to tell Eddie "that this is enough you used to make Buck do all of this for your family and you would never give him any recognition for for, yeah this is not going to work for me and I don't think it worked for Buck but he was too kind to tell you that so he kept his mouth shut and waited for you to say a thank you or something but you  never did but he kept helping you because he cares about you Chris more then anything in the whole damn world." And that is when Eddie will get it through his head just how bad he fucked this all up, and it will hit him just why Buck has slipped out of their lives like that because someone must have mentioned it to him and him most have thought about it and realized that they were right and left the Diez's.    

Ok, so at this point, my hands feel like they might come off, but if you all want a second part of this, I am happy to do it. Thank you for listing to what I have to say. It means a lot.    

[cinematicnomad]

tagged by @tylerhunklin​ to answer these buddie questions 🥰

001. what was your first ever buddie post? my first buddie post was reblogging this gifset of buck crying out for chris during the tsunami eps and eddie during eddie begins! looks like i reblogged it on june 9th around 1AM and it was my second ever 911 post on my blog 

002. who was the first buddie blog you followed 😬😬 oh i don’t know?? it looks like a lot of my early reblogs were from @daily911 and @spenserclay so probably one of those two! also technically i found out about the show and ship from @tattooedsiren who has been a mutual of mine for almost a decade now 

003. who is your favourite buddie blog? how can i pick?? 

004. what was the first fic you bookmarked? i don’t bookmark fics, sorry! i remember when i first started reading fics i went searching for tsunami fics specifically 

005. what is your favourite oneshot? i’m not sure if this counts bc it’s part of the evolution of buddie series, but @marvelingjules‘ fic bittersweet triumph is one of my top tier faves!! it’s the entry where eddie’s parents come to town and they assume buck and eddie are dating and take issue with it and things come to blow

006. what is your favourite multi-chapter fic? @bibuddie‘s fic series the things we lost in the fire!! 200k+ spread across 2 fics and over 30 chapters dealing with buck’s childhood trauma, his relationship with his parents, and his growing feelings for eddie. it is So Good and i am working myself up to a re-read sometime soon. 

007. what is your favourite ‘established’ fic? honestly, i don’t read a lot of established fics (mainly bc my favorite part in fanfic is reading about a couple Getting Together) but i absolutely love @woodchoc-magnum‘s fic series you can tell everybody this is your song!! TECHNICALLY it’s not fully established bc the first fic does cover them getting together but like ... it’s a 330k+ series and part 1 is only 18k so i am saying it counts and that is my final answer. 

008. what is your favourite ‘getting together’ fic? i absolutely adore @sevensoulmates‘ fic don’t take my sunshine away—does that count as a getting together fic? i mean they Get Together but there are definitely other things happening in the fic. whatever, that’s the answer i’m going with!! 

009. if buddie went canon, how do you think it would happen? i meeeeeean i try not to get my hopes up too much so i don’t tend to think about how it would work out in canon, but i figure if it DID one of them would start dating a girl and the other would get jealous bc suddenly the other is busy all the time and preoccupied with someone else and not understand where all that jealousy is coming from until they have their big Epiphany Moment. and then eventually they’d have a great dramatic confession and a kiss and it would be peak content but AGAIN i’ll take what i can get tbh

010. what are your top 4 headcanons for buddie? a.) buck fell in love with eddie in 3.03 when he said there was no one else he trusted with chirs more b.) eddie doesn’t have any sexual/romantic experience with guys (buck def does) but he is aware of his attraction to men. he’s just never acted on it  c.) eddie has definitely given a copy of his house key to buck d.) buck is on the list of approved guardians/adults to contact/people allowed to pick him up for chris at his school 

i’ll tag @crazyassmurdererwall, @woodchoc-magnum, @bibuddie, and anyone else who wants to do this

[teekily]

To be honest I feel like christopher going to summer camp for two weeks and him leaving eddie a card that says eddie is going to have a greart time somehow means when s4 comes they're gonna tell the audiences Eddie has been in a relationship with Ana they see each other again while Chirs is away

And I also know all this came from just my pure bitterness because the truth is cis het couples in media can do JUST THAT while I had to stop myself from yelling at this studio owner I went to for proposing my project of sci-fi fantasy tv show with four lgbt characters as leadinh characters because the first thing he said to me was 'we already have too many shows with gay characters it's redundant' like bitch i bet you never rejected a project because there so many shows with cis het characters already.

[play-these-heavens-one-more-time]

I started listening to what has been known as “the Seattle scene/sound” nearly 13 years ago, when I was 14. I was an unpopular, unhappy, lonely little person with more doubts about life than anything else. A couple of months later that year, I was forced to jump on the ordinary timeline of life and I became an “adult” version of myself when I was still essentially just a kid. All of this happening at the same time that all the adults in my life started to behave more like spoiled little children than I’ve ever seen them. Were they always like this and I was just beginning to see it? Or did something happen that turned everyone into such a crappy version of themselves?

The thing is that I found myself in this very complex position, in this weird awful environment where everyone hated each other, where everyone thought they were right… where everyone thought they could do whatever the fuck they wanted without thinking of the consequences behind…. Consequences that most of the time had to do with like… their daughter, for example.

I felt guilty for everything that was going on… not because I was actually guilty, but apparently that’s how kids who have been through a traumatic situation end up feeling. I felt so bad that I made a deal with myself that I was never gonna be a problem to anyone “anymore”… and to do that I had only two choices…. I could disappear in front of everyone’s eyes by making myself smaller, quieter, to the point where I would stop talking and eating. Locking myself in my room but still doing everything that I had to do so nobody would notice that I wasn’t there…. I thought that if I didn’t do one of my tasks at home or that if I failed a class or if I brought any problem home, people would actually pay attention to me which would ruin my plan of disappearing…. I had to keep all things as normal as possible so that they wouldn’t miss me or see me. In my mind, this was a perfect plan… because the other option was to kill myself. Which I actually considered several times but I never got the nerve to do it… I’m too scared of physical pain.

So, I decided to go on with plan A, which turned out to be actually easy? which at the same time made me realize how forgettable I was, how replaceable that I could actually dissapear and no one missed me, so easy to take for granted, so easy to be left out of the picture, so easy to be left alone, so easy to just… forget that I was there, feeling, living…. Growing up.

It was also during this time of confusion that I made another pact with myself: I would NEVER become someone remotely similar to any member of my family. I wished nothing more than being the complete opposite to whatever the hell they were (and still are). But then I realized that I had no one to look up to, no adults I could possibly admire, no one I could trust, nobody was honest enough to win my loyalty, everyone seemed so fake, always trying to look like they were something more than the pile of shit they actually were, everyone pretending to have it together, but actually being just another crazy motherfucker doing nothing to be better...  That was the time when I found this group of artists… who, after a long time of me feeling completely lost, gave me some kind of direction… they basically showed me that art was the answer. That I could find truth in music and books. That I didn’t need people in “real life” when I could immerse myself in “their” world, which by the way, seemed so achievable for me. It was like I didn’t even have to try… it was like finding home, my real home. I didn’t need to buy new clothes to follow a trend, I didn’t have to “look” differently from what I did because they were dressed just like me.

Remember what Eddie said when he met Neil Young? Like he finally had an adult in his life to live by example, someone he could actually look up to, after some crazy adults in his life he finally had someone who inspired him. Well, for me, that was “them”.

And the music…  oh my god, the music… it was so pure, so raw, so honest… a word that for a long time seemed like a utopia, I found truth in their sound. I didn’t fully understand their language (I didn’t know much English then) but I knew that they were singing about something familiar, I could feel it, in their voices, in their guitars, in that sound… it felt like the kind of sound I would make if I only knew how.

That was when I “met” Kurdt, Krist, Dave, Eddie, Stone, Jeff, Mike,Andy, Chris, Matt, Jerry, Layne, Kim, Jennifer, Donita, Kathleen, and all these bands, from green river, to bikini kill, and l7 and 7 year bitch and nirvana and pearl jam, and soundgarden and mlb, and alice in chains and stp and every single one of them… I knew all of them. With time I started listening to more and more bands and my music taste began to expand and I’m really grateful for that. It was all because of them. They were the ones who started all for me. Every single band that I listen to right now, in some way I can connect it to one in this group of musicians. It wasn’t long until they became my friends. My only friends. I was so lost into their music and the music they brought to my ears that I didn’t have any interest in meeting new people. And nobody wanted to be my friend either… nobody listened to this music like I did, nobody cared about music like I did. No one. Then I got into college and even though I met people who are huge music fans, they didn’t listen to these bands either. Which only made me reinforce my position. I was there to represent them.

I’ve thought about giving up several times since that first ultimatum… I’ve wanted to choose plan b and actually disappear from this earth and a couple of times I’ve been really close. But I’ve always found comfort and company in their music. I always knew I could count on them. ALWAYS. They were always there to make me laugh and to hold me whenever I’ve fallen down. They’ve always been there to help me put myself back together every time my life has broken into little pieces. And that’s why it hurts so bad right now. That’s why it doesn’t make any sense to me that they’re dying. It broke my heart when Scott died, and now… I just have no words to express how much this affects me. Chris for fuck’s sake. It’s just too fucking close to my heart. It’s fucking family to me.

I know that most people here recognize me as a red hot chili peppers / john frusciante fan, which I am. But before them… there were these guys. It if wasn’t for this group of people, maybe I would’ve never had the chance to hear the chili peppers in the first place.

My history with them comes way before I even knew how the internet works. I would walk for hours and wait for hours just to make a copy of someone else’s cd because I didn’t have any money to buy an original one.

I would talk to people just so they would let me see their albums and their old magazines… it was the only way I could learn something about them. I would ask that classmate of mine, who I barely talked to if she could ask his brother to ask his friend for that nirvana dvd she said she had seen once… that if she could ask him to make a copy for me…

I stole posters of nirvana from other people’s garbage bins.

I have pearl jam’s t shirts that are older than you that I bought in the flea market 10 years ago and that were already ripped.

I have tapes from radio shows that are 12 years old, with interviews of chirs and layne and kurtd. Sometimes they would play some bits of documentaries and I was there, next to my crappy cassette player ready to record everything and then learn their answers by heart, taking notes of every artist or band they would mention.

That’s the real me.

That’s the person I’ve been for most part of my life.

And that is why every time I feel lost I go back to listen to them because that’s where I find myself. I find that real me.

I’ll turned 27 in a couple months and I’m still that person. I still see them as my family and friends. Mainly because I still haven’t been able to make “real” friends. And because I still hate the way the members of my family are. I still disagree with their opinions and I still don’t want to relate to what they think or what they are.

There was a time in my life where my boss couldn’t remember my actual name so she started calling me “Nirvana” because according to her “I see you and I think about nirvana, that’s you as a person”. She did that for as long as I worked there which was about a year (then she killed herself… by hanging).

I started writing this because I feel like I need to start putting the pieces back together… my life was brutally shaken that night when the news about Chris came out. I feel like they took a piece of my life without permission and I want it back because I’m scared I can’t live without it… that part that has been with me for so long… that was a milestone in the formation of this adult version of myself that I had to create 13 years ago… He was there… and I don’t know how to let him go…

I stopped talking to people for the last couple of days because I needed to think about this… My mind has been busy trying to put the puzzle back together, trying to make sense out of it and no one here would be able to understand any of this. First of all because they don’t know what is like to be this emotionally attached to an artist or band and second because they don’t care. They don’t think it’s that important. And I don’t have the time or energy to make them understand, to explain something that you just have to experience. There’s no other way. I can’t tell them to imagine their lives without friends or parents and then find a group of people who 30 years ago made this music that became your lifestyle, your home.

I don’t really care if nobody reads this, I just needed to write it down so I could understand it myself.

And I wanted to say THANK YOU, to Chris, to Soundgarden, to Temple of the Dog, for helping me so many times. For being with me through all these years. For giving me hope. For making me feel like I belonged somewhere. For making me feel like you were a friend. I love you Chris. I really hope you find peace. And that your soul is resting in a nice place… I will never forget you and what you did for me. And every time I think of you I see you smiling at me and that gives me a little peace in these times of trouble…

All of this happening at a very low point in my life… maybe it was a coincidence, maybe it wasn’t… I’m feeling lost and vulnerable again. And it’s scary because the last time I felt like this I almost didn’t make it… and it took a lot of time and work to put myself back together… just to stand up and walk out of my room… I’m not really sure how I got here or how I’m supposed to get out again, but I know I’ll be listening to you, to all these bands just like I always do.

thanks for everything that you did for me in this life, i will miss you every day.

[buddieandbrettsey188-61]

Vent part 2

This might be me, and that is fine, to be honest, but I really want Lena to come back just till this whole Ana thing is over. I just think that she is the type of person who can really help Buck get his life on track with the help of Taylor. Of course, this can be wired for Buck in the start since he was not close to her when she was working at 118 but times have changed and that is why I kind of want her back, let me explain I think I have done this once for Lena but I will do it again, the more I see Buck the worse I feel for him since he is a lot like me in the sense that I would do anything and I mean anything to make others happy so when I see Buck do things like that I can not help but think" don't do it you're just hurting yourself" but he never listens so here I am, first and foremost let me make this clear Buck needs more friends and I know I have said this before but it is true he needs people who don't know him the way the 118 does he needs to branch out, now I get it Lena does know Buck she does but not as well, yes well enough that she can tell that he is in Love with Eddie but that is the point she is just going to help along with Taylor (side not I am loving this new Taylor) okay now that we have Taylor on Buck's team we need Lena because she takes shit from no one and I love that I like seeing her be the person she wants to be and not the person she has too which is nice since that is what Buck is like too going back to the fact the Buck needs more friends he does and that is that also let us take about the loft okay so he is lonely I am going to say it and I will get heat on that but it is fact we have all seen his house it is empty there is not much happening in that loft now is a little diffrent but still. Okay, now I go off, so if you love Eddie, you can leave, but if you are like me and just want him to see what he has in front of his face, this is for you. Eddie needs a slap, and I mean a big one like that one where he gets dizzy because I have no idea what he is doing. He can really get under my skin. Sometimes he is fine, and I love him but is he that dumb that he does not see what he is doing? He is killing what he has with Buck, and I am not talking about Friday nights with Chris; I am talking about what he has JUST with Buck that friendship is going up in flames and he does not see it I read fanfic, and obviously, I can not remember what it is called. Still, it is one where Buck has a breakdown and ends up at Hen's house at like 2 in the morning, and Hen is like, this is it you are done to more Eddie. You have to distance yourself and just keep it professional with him because this is killing you. That is what happened to Hen with Chimney's help, and I think Cap just stayed away from Eddie so that he could fix himself.

Look, I have nothing agents Eddie dating. I think it is good after everything he had been through, but this is just too much he is acting he is love with someone who would have to be blinded and deaf not to see and hear Chirs and Eddie talk about Buck like he is the best thing that the plant has done. Likewise, I don't hate Ana. She is great; to be honest, she is just not what Eddie needs. We all know how the two boys talk to each other it is like they have known each other their whole lives with Ana. It is not like that, and it never will be. Now we are back to Buck, so Buck has forgotten how to breathe since the presents left, and Eddie play this game with him is not helping. So separate the two of them, Eddie is not helping, and if there is a chance that we can get BUCK back, they do that, which I guess means let him go, let him be free the poor man had not really lived. The man is happy but is he really? Because in my book he is not, he is honestly tired, specifically tired of being used and hurt by people who are meant to be there for him, so he should go on a Buck only trip somewhere and chill, turn his phone off and go to the beach and look hot af just for himself. And back at home, Eddie is losing his shit because he does not know how to parent without Buck, so he ends it with Ana and needs to get some help.

That is it for this one it is not the best, but it is something, for now, the more we watch, the more I will be able to talk about it, again if there is anything that I missed or that you would like me to talk about let me know in the comments and I will try to hit them next time. Thank you