#I will not be doing that to myself again
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Replaying RDR2! It’s Molly time
#I cannot STAND DUTCH oh my goodness#and you’re telling me I have to put up with him for an entire game?? he’s a main character????? certainly not#I greatly disliked him from chapter 2 onwards in my first playthrough but now I have the knowledge#rdr2#I will not be playing past chapter 4 for my own sake#I got so emotional over Molly the first playthrough it was affecting my life#I will not be doing that to myself again#and conveniently she leaves camp after the bank robbery so I don’t have to play that either
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
to moving forward
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itadori yuuji#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#satoru gojo#jjk manga spoilers#hina.comic#before any1 says anything i KNOw his birthday is in december ik ik ik this is just 2 show some post-battle bonding after the trauma#its winter in canon n megumi's birthday has passed and he spent it being piloted like a mech so they need to celebrate Now!!#also this was technically a request lmao anon wanted megumi birthday angst hehehehhe i hope u like it <3 bc it KILLED ME DEAD#im going to collapse remember when i said this wasnt harder than the hydrangeas im having second thoughts#page 8 made me want to bash my head in#could have stuck with one flashback image could have left them monochrome could have done literally anything 2 ease the workload#but noooo the chronic overachiever in me would not allow it#rule of threes i had to include all of them and they Had to be in colour it wouldn't have hit the same if i had kept it monochrome#i needed it to look how childhood memories look i needed it to look oversaturated and hazy and fond but unmistakably Gone#it may have killed me but im so proud of this rn like from an art style perspective these megumis and yuujis r top tier by my standards#personal favourites r the first and last panel of crying megumi like not 2 pat myself on th back but expression?????? hello??????#enjoy your cake megumi you've earned it <333 sorry fr hurting ur feelings it will happen again#oh my god i can sleep tonight bless <333 and i met my 3 day deadline NICE im so good at what i do
13K notes
·
View notes
Text
I need to talk about this because it's making me feel insane.
Last week, my white leftist goyisch friends sat me, a wholeass antizionist Jew, down for a "talk" because they "needed to check in about Palestine" and make sure "our values aligned before we hung out again". They apparently needed to "suss out" where I stood on Palestinian rights, despite having had several conversations about Palestine and them being some of my closest friends. They needed to check, to search for and uncover my true values, because I had said some "disturbing things" that had made them "suspicious".
Disturbing things included:
Supporting IfNotNow which is a "liberal zionist organization" because it normalizes Jewish heritage in the Levant
Not bringing Palestine up enough, despite them also not bringing it up (this was apparently a test)
Mentioning that the Houthi's flag talks about cursing all Jews
Saying Stalin was antisemitic because of the "all the paw-grihms"
...and apparently other things they wouldn't specify, but had been tracking for months.
To clarify, I am an antizionist Jew from three generations of antizionist Jews. I have been vocal in my support of Palestinian liberation and in my condemnation both of Israel's actions and its violent founding as a state, and of zionism in many of its forms. I am a regular donor to Palestinian and Jewish NGOs and advocate for Jewish antizionism in person, at temple, and online. I have been talking about Palestinian liberation before they could point to Gaza on a map. But they needed to make sure, they needed to "suss out", they needed to check. And it's notable that the majority of moments that made them suspicious of me were times where I talked about antisemitism: not about Palestinian liberation, not about Israeli decolonization, not about anything actually relevant to Palestine. It was talking about antisemitism that made them check to see if I was a cryptozionist.
One of the most pervasive and insidious forms of antisemitism is the idea that Jews are inherently untrustworthy and suspicious. You have to constantly be on guard, track what they say and do, "suss out" the real truth. You have to keep them in line and and watch them carefully because they're liars and sneaks, and if you're not looking closely they'll return to their real values (and drag you down with them). This is where the idea of "cryptozionist" comes from and what it's directly building off of: the inherent untrustworthiness of Jews and the need to check. Because no matter how close you become you can't actually trust them, and any upstanding gentile should make sure to avoid associating with Jews before "sussing out" their real allegiances and intentions. You have to make them turn out their pockets, just in case.
I'm the first and only Jew they actually were friends with; I know because they've told me (strangely proud of it in the way white Americans are proud of that kind of thing). They've asked me questions about Judaism and fawned over how beautiful and unique it was for me to be connected to my community and culture. Pre-October 7th, one of them had even mentioned being interested in coming to services at my temple. She still has my copy of our siddur. But now she needed to "check" before she could be seen with me in public. Which is what it was: it wasn't a "you're my friend and I need to give you some feedback because you're fucking up" kind of intervention (which is normal and important to have), it was a trial. It was a last chance for me to prove to them that I'm clean-enough that they could afford to risk being seen with me in public, just in case someone noticed them fraternizing with a hypothetical Enemy and their leftism was compromised. It was a test to make sure that I behave properly when required to, that I'd play along and do what I'm told and turn out my pockets if asked (because any refusal would validate the notion of having something to hide). And above all it was an opportunity for them to reaffirm their own cleanliness by putting my imagined immorality in its place.
I did what I needed to do: I smiled. I apologized. I "didn't know that". I "appreciated the feedback". I turned out my pockets because what else could I do? They'd decided who I was and what I believed, regardless of what I said or did, so there was no point in explaining that they were wrong about me. If I had told them they were being antisemitic, it would just have been proof that they were right. Caring about antisemitism is a dogwhistle in the spaces they've chosen: it's not a real form of oppression, it's a tactic for sneaky, lying Jews to weasel out of admitting their true alliances. There was nothing I could say.
Nothing's really changed for me. I'm going to continue my activism for Palestinian liberation rooted in my culture and my faith. Antizionism is still not antisemitism. But I got a reminder that many white goyisch leftists fundamentally just don't trust Jews, and that the activist spaces they're in not only exacerbate their antisemitism in an increasingly insular echo chamber, but also allow them to finally vent their internalized bigotry in a socially-acceptable way. In my former friends' eyes, what they did was activism—disavowing a Jew (and making me feel humiliated, scared, and unclean in the process) as a cathartic stand-in for doing fucking anything for actual Palestinian liberation—but for me it was a grief that I'll be feeling for a long time: not only over losing friends I loved and trusted, but also over my sense of belonging and security in leftist spaces.
#jumblr#I need to talk about this because I feel like I'm losing it a little#its incredibly disconcerting to have this come out of nowhere from people I trusted and it's hard to not blame myself somehow#antizionism#antizionist jew#judaism#jewish#jew#jewblr#leftist#leftism#leftist antisemitism#antisemitism#Palestine#Israel#again to reiterate: I am just as committed to Palestinian liberation as ever and antizionism is still not antisemitism#but fuck do some leftists put in the legwork to making it seem like it is huh#free Palestine
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
11/20
#big day for doomed yaoi enjoyers#(me)#i’m never ever doing this again i was screaming every minute coloring this i literally cannot do hard light#biggest case of “trust the process” i’ve ever experienced in my life#also i was gonna originally do a gun instead of knife to keep it canon but i quickly learned i can’t in fact draw guns#a knife is more symbolic anyway. stabbed in the back. yk#(trying to comfort myself that i can’t draw firearms even after eight years of art)#i remember playing this scene for the first time and actually breaking down at 2am bc that betrayal STUNG#i actually had no remorse for akechi after that 😭😭 i actually felt like a sadist for enjoying beating his ass in shidos palace#akechi as a character was specifically designed to make me go through all five stages of grief within a matter of minutes#absolute rollercoaster of emotions#ANYWAY IM FINALLY FREE TIME TO NOT DO ART FOR THE NEXT FOUR MONTHS 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼#persona 5 royal#persona 5#p5#p5r#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#goro akechi#akechi goro#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
uh-huh
#I NEEEEEED TO GET COMFORTABLE SHARING SILLY DOODLES AGAIN idk why i stopped#my art#firestar#fireheart#sandstorm#waca#wc art#warrior cats#warriors#in my brain im doing a backflip. u guys just have to trust me its really cool#half of this is me poking fun at myself LOL u guys know how it is
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
Alcohol can't kill Logan, but it can affect him. Wade can't kill Logan, but he can—oh.
#I MADE MYSELF SAD AGAIN HELP#there’s SOMETHING about this parallel#ughhhh#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#Deadpool 3#ryan reynolds#hugh jackman#logan howlett#wade wilson#HUGH WHY DO YOU MAKE LOGAN LOOK SO SOFT WHILE LOOKING AT WADE#WILL I EVER BE NORMAL ABOUT THEM??!#they’re in love bye#deadpool wolverine#deadpool x wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool vs wolverine#my gifs#marvel#mcu
7K notes
·
View notes
Text
pressing the envelope.
#sorry for the silence! not been doing good#trying to coax myself into drawing at my usual pace again by overproducing some#changeling au#my art#adrien agreste#felix fathom#marinette dupain cheng#anyway bad luck marinette! i wonder who hates the chime child....
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
he did it! 🐍 and it only took...uhhh...well, there probably could've been less punches, but why hold back!
PUNCHES FOR EVERYONE
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 9 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 9 spoilers#snakes#ONE MORE DOWN#oh my god happy jamil was SO scary and yet adorable all at once#i want real jamil to see him and just be utterly disgusted#and yet he got nothing on the return of everyone's favorite twst character: WEIRD RHYTHMIC ELEPHANT#oh weird rhythmic elephant what would we do without you#me kicking my stupid little feet as jamil wakes up through sheer force of kalim though#he was SO happy for jamil and SO ready to just go along with everything. my sweet boy.#jamil getting so flustered by him that he's just shocked back into reality#and the SLAPFIGHT#silver being like 'they need this' and doing his one smile animation as kalim and jamil are pulling on each other's hair and going YOU SMEL#mmm yes delicious#also this is probably nothing but#but...they brought up the whole thing with azul having dirt on crowley again#the thing that was briefly alluded to in episode 4 and never mentioned ever again?!#i had JUST finally convinced myself that i was reading too much into it and it was just azul playing along with jamil's plan#but now they've mentioned it again and i'm going to be all BUT WHAT DOES IT MEEEEEAAAAN for another three years about it#is it a meaningless reference to that one scene?! is it absolutely ridiculous foreshadowing?! am i ever going to be validated?!#I HAVE TO KNOW
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
There's doomed yuri... in my FNAF ruin?
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#roxanne wolf#fnaf roxy#glamrock chica#security breach#fnaf ruin#fnaf fanart#yuri#happy pride#SHOUT OUT to the ruined vers of Roxy and Chica 🔥🔥#this is post getting her voice box back btw#this comic is based off that one MHA page#I don’t read mha but I always wanted to redraw those panels myself#I JUST thought it was sweet if Chica still thinks Roxy is pretty#despite not having her face anymore#Roxy seemingly really needs that validation so I think this is cute#I ACTUALLY had a lot of fun drawing them#I wasn’t sure if I could make the ruined designs like work well#but I’m happy how they turned out#I really hope we do see Roxy and Chica again new vers of them or whatever#Doomed yuri in fnaf is so real 🧡🤍🩷
7K notes
·
View notes
Text
wait putting everything on hold for one second.
connor????
#yall havin a good time???????????#literally always something with this guy#add this to the ''how are you not banned yet '' post#connoreatspants#went on twt to see all the old manifolders suddenly becoming active again (i even got vauged for doing that myself lmao)#and connor???#tiggady tags#screw it im maintaggin this just bc its mildly related bc he tweeted this abt an hour after the inciting incident (jack loggin on)#dsmp
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
self care is writing a fic that you’re literally the sole target audience for
#nobody was asking for a spn pmmm crossover fic focusing on claire at 14#who by this point has already been manipulated into agreeing to something without knowing all the terms and conditions first#and it was awful and the worst day of her life#so when kyubey approaches her she doesn't go for it#but the people around her do and so claire gets to watch people she loves die horribly AGAIN#like there is nothing in spn canon that contradicts any of this#but literally nobody is wanting a fic like this to exist#nobody except for me#so i guess i have to do everything myself around here#el talks
41K notes
·
View notes
Text
REPLICA PLAYLIST
MUSIC UNDER CUT
I have been receiving requests for any songs that inspired Replica, so here, have my personal playlist. Sorry it’s not Spotify/Soundcloud but they don’t have some of these songs available so uh… guess you’re stuck with YouTube vids. For fun I'll include my personal titles for them (which might give a few hints of what to expect in the future/end).
Replica Main Theme - “Die for You” by Grabbitz Like Father Like Son Like Brother (Omega and Shelldon) - "As Above So Below" by Alistair Lindsay Mikey's Theme / The 1st Vision - "Suzume no Tojimari" by Nanoka Hara Military (Mad) Dogs / Central Park Colony - "Imperium" by Madeon Shanghai - "Icarus" by Madeon Boom Goes the Donnie-mite (Mikey/Donnie vs the Sweeper) - "The Red Zone" by Mitsuoto Suzuki The Day the Sky Bled Red - "7 Seconds Till the End" by Nobuo Uematsu Going Out Like a Boss (Raph and Leo) - "Agape" by Nicholas Britell Remembering the Right Way (Mikey and Leo) - "The Souls of Many" - by Alistair Lindsay Mystic Hands / The 2nd Vision - "Am I Dreaming" by Metro Boomin x A$AP Book 2 Trailer - "Sea Dragon" by Covet 7 Years Later - "Iron" by Woodkid Leo's Theme / Attack on the Labor Camp - "Ego Death" by Polyphia Omega's Theme - "Touch" by Daft Punk Flat Lines (Omega Alone) - "Die Toteninsel Emptiness" by 1000 Eyes Spear - "Monsters" by Tommee Profitt Final Protocol - "The Kraken" by Katie Dey Rise / Epilogue - "Close in the Distance" by Masayoshi Soken & Tom Mills
I will admit, it's a little embarrassing since you can easily see the patterns of what I've been listening to for the past year or two. I swear I listen to more than just videogame OSTs, these songs just jive well with the story and I often find lyrics distracting when brainstorming scenes. Regardless, the music I listen to is such an important part of my creative process and some of these songs really defined the scenes I now have locked in my head. So I figured it was only fair to give them the credit they're due.
I will continue to add to this playlist, and will note in comic updates when one of these songs is applicable!
#lofi Donnie anyone?#also sort of celebration for 19k followers wow#should I do something else for it?#I particularly like Leo's theme being titled Ego Death#very fitting#Also the final song makes me cry because the lyrics are just too dang perfect#I'd like to do an animatic with the song when this story is all done#check out the lyrics if you get the chance#in fact I'd like to do an animatic trailer for the Book 2 Teaser#we'll see though#i can't allow myself to get too distracted from the comic itself haha#replica#rottmnt replica#kathaynesart#playlist#music#spoilers? but like... you know how it ends in the movie so not really?#kind of?#did you see the rise movie?#then you’ve been spoiled sorry#posting again at an ungodly hour#I am tired#save rottmnt#rottmnt#TMNT#Donatello#casey jones
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
“A man like me will do amazing things to be seen”
HELLLLOOOOOO THE TERROR FANDOM!!
I hereby formerly apply to become the 4th member of this esteemed small society (jokes aside why is no one into this show it’s been consuming my life for a week)
#no idea what happened with the background#not at all what I planned but I’m not mad#I haven’t used procreate in over a year so for a first try again it kinda eats if I do say so myself#the terror#the terror amc#james fitzjames#froggerart
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
mourning black and the death of ideals
#i haven't moved on from this yet. btw. i'm still here#finally decided to draw the thought i've been ruminating over for days on end bc it's like a parasite eating away my brain#stated this on the initial post i made days ago but there's just smt so gut wrenching and sickening#about how dazai will have worn black exactly twice in his life: once as a member of the mafia and now at kunikida's funeral#a color that initially signified devotion to the mafia and his demon prodigy alias now signifies his grief#him having to wear black again at the funeral of another doomed fatalist who chose his heart over his survival. his own partner.#kunikida's death being so reminiscent of the tragedy that initially caused him to defect and flee#and everything tying together full circle and effectively breaking him#asagiri rly said fuck knkdz it's doppover we lost gang 😭😭😭#why did bro leave that fucking notebook behind#fool. do you know that angst potential you have left me to work with?#love never won in bsd. it lay dead and festering#i don't know how much longer i can keep saying i miss them. i'm going to kill myself if he doesn't come back#i've never wanted something to be death bait so desperately#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#(??? technically. its implied anyway)#lotus draws
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
Sweet Dreams
#rats smp#ratssmp#treebark#ratsshipping#<- just in case#aka captains favorite pt 2#Im so. far in the trenches.man.#the absolute brainrot. im experienicng. unparalelled#im gonna go. ban myself from drawing rats again for alittle bit. so I can actually Do Other Things#but ahhh ahhhh the rats!! the rats man!! theyre eepy!! theyre so small and eepy!!
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
wanted to practice some more intense angry expressions and what better excuse to further my agenda of giving megumi the emotional catharsis he deserves
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#yall know tht one juuzou panel gjkgdghjkdfhgjkgd#guess what was my ref fr bottom right#i think megumi deserves to scream real guttural at least once#i think it would be good for him and i certainly would not complain to see it#i love stoic emotionally constipated characters dont get me wrong but also like. come on. points at the 'whatever!' scene#he's so GOOD when he gets to be expressive like PLEASE#anyway i once again have to do everything myself in this house when it comes to this kid#so i am treating myself to 4 flavours of angry megu#here we've got a fine selection of enraged ; holding himself back from clocking a mf by a thread ; seething ; and tortured :D#the classic capricorn emotions#real talk tho anger is Hard to draw#also bad fr the state of my skin probably with the way i was subconsciously Making these expressions as i drew#gna give myself wrinkles at 24 i had my brow furrowed so deeply
2K notes
·
View notes