#I was going to make it into a full animation but never did
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I beg on my knees, please do a mtf! sevika x ftm! reader, where sevika tries to get her sweet sub hubby pregnant✨✨
♡┊TW: mtf!sevika, ftm!reader, vaginal penetration, au, t-dick, breeding, mommykink, unprotected sex...+
She would be astonished and proud that you lasted so many hours on her cock. It had been a long time since the two of you had fucked like animals in heat. The older woman's cock throbbed with each thrust of her hips meeting yours, every expression of pleasure spilling from your lips as you rode her like your life depended on it. The sensation was intoxicating—like honey, sweeter and more addictive than the purest drug. She knew she would never tire of it.
You were so wet she could feel it dripping down to her balls, the obscene, beautiful sounds of your slick echoing through the room. Your already sore and reddened pussy clung to her, while your t-dick was overstimulated to the point of aching. Yet, she didn't stop. Her fingers continued massaging that sensitive spot, drawing out desperate whimpers of her name from your lips like a mantra. You begged her to cum again, to fill your womb until you couldn’t feel your legs anymore. But she couldn’t stop—she wouldn’t.
Even as your muscles burned and pleaded for rest, your core craved more. Struggling to find your wife’s soft breasts amidst the overwhelming pleasure, you clung to her as she used her hips to hit your sweet spot repeatedly.
The older woman grunted and moaned, her hands gently holding your head in place as she encouraged you to suck on her nipples and the soft flesh of her breasts. She watched you through a haze of pleasure, her cock pulsing deep inside your body.
"Good boy..." she murmured, her voice hoarse and dripping with affection. "Taking everything mommy has to offer, huh? Fuck... I’m going to fill you up so much—I’ll make you such a beautiful father."
Her hands gripped your hips tighter, her thrusts growing sharper as she grabbed your ass cheeks to drive herself deeper, the head of her cock brushing against your womb. She slapped your face gently, forcing you to look into her eyes. The firmness of her grip kept you grounded, though it would have been easier to lose yourself completely in the overwhelming sensation.
Her thumb traced your bottom lip, her gaze softening as she smiled faintly. A warning pulse of her cock made you gasp. "I want you to keep it all inside, okay? I want to make sure my husband takes it all like the strong man he is."
Her words hypnotized you, making you whimper and beg for another hot load. Sevika was all too happy to grant your wish. Her final thrusts were accompanied by the sound of skin slapping and filthy words spilling into the air. When she came again, you felt your walls milk her cock, greedily taking every drop of her cum as it painted your insides. Her thick fingers pressed against your entrance, ensuring not a single drop escaped.
She kissed your forehead, her hand soothingly running along your back as you calmed. "It’s okay, baby boy. You took it all like a good man. I can’t wait to see you looking beautiful and full with our children." she whispered, her voice tender and filled with promise.
And if the next few weeks didn’t bring results, she would make sure you stayed on her cock until they did—even if it meant keeping you there 24/7.
★ ! yanderestarangel©
#yanderestarangel#afab reader#tw smut#sevika headcanon#sevika fic#sevika x reader#sevika x afab reader#sevika x y/n#sevika x male reader#sevika x ftm reader#sevika x you#sevika smut#arcane smut#arcane headcanon#arcane imagine#arcane#sevika fanfic#sevika#ftm t4t#t4t nsft#t4t#t4t smut#trans reader#transmasc reader#mtf dom
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hi, i absolutely love your animal series and can not wait to read all of your diversity december fics but especially the one about an autistic reader! if it's something you'd like to write and/or something that you have the time to fit in would you consider writing a logan x autistic!reader who is having one of those days where their taste buds are all out of whack and he is trying so hard to find something that you can eat because he refuses to let you go to bed without food. maybe a bit of trial and error in their too, like he makes you something but you just can't eat it and expect him to get mad but he's so nice and gentle about it. thanks and don't worry if not 💛
logan howlett x autistic!reader
series masterlist - my masterlist
you may have a meltdown if this day gets any worse. all you want is to go to bed, to shut your eyes to the too-bright lights and fall into a slumber where you don’t have to deal with the buzzing under your skin. tomorrow you’ll wake up feeling marginally better, and you’ll move on as you always do.
but logan’s protective, obsessive about taking care of you, and refuses to let you go to bed without eating. usually it’s nice to have someone like him around, helpful when you’re often forgetting to take care of yourself in such ways, and it’s likely that tomorrow you’ll be grateful to him for feeding you, but right now you’re just tired and overstimulated.
nothing tastes right, your taste buds are all out of whack, and no matter what he makes you, you’re pretty sure it will only make you feel worse. even some of your safe foods aren’t sounding very safe food-y at the moment.
he’s wrapped a weighted blanket around you, turned the lights off in your shared room so that the only illumination comes from the open window, the golden glow of the setting sun. you focus on your breathing, in and out, the texture and weight of the blanket, the rocking motion of your body, back and forth.
there’s a quiet knock on your door, logan letting you know he’s returned, making sure he doesn’t catch you off guard when you’re in this state. he enters with a plate of food, one of your safe foods, and yet when you have the plate in your hands, when you have a forkful of food in your mouth, all you can feel is nausea crawling up your esophagus.
“i can’t,” you choke out, pushing it back into his hands, swallowing against the lump in your throat and pressure in your chest, “just let me sleep. i’ll be better tomorrow.”
he stands by your bedside but doesn’t come any closer, allowing you full control of the situation, letting you decide what kind of proximity you can handle right now. his eyes are so gentle, so understanding, and the kindness he affords you only makes you feel worse.
you wish he would shout at you, call you impossible the way your parents did, throw his hands in the air and tell you to deal with it yourself if you’re going to be difficult. his reactions are an unknown in a world that you thought you finally understood, and it scares you sometimes, how easily he breaks through your walls with his helpful nature and quiet admittances of somewhat understanding the way you’re feeling.
“you can’t go to bed without food,” he says, as if he doesn’t do it all the time. but he wants you to be healthy, never wants you to imitate his bad habits.
tears prick at your eyes, frustration rising in your chest, anger at yourself and at him and at the world and at your brain for being the way it is. he catches your hands before you can bury them into the skin of your arms, nails digging into the flesh, the only way you’re able to let out the volatile energy coursing through you.
“i’ll eat this, you don’t have to,” he continues, his thumb rubbing over your knuckles, “just tell me something you think you can eat. anything. it doesn’t have to be big or a full meal. and i’ll go make it for you.”
he’s too gentle with you, too kind, too understanding. it’s something you never thought you’d find in a relationship, not when you’ve been told your entire life that it’s too difficult to deal with your issues. but if logan’s willing to put in the effort, you tell yourself that you’ll try too, push yourself to be the person he thinks you can be.
so you let your head fall into his chest. he doesn’t touch you, doesn’t push your boundaries any further, just lets you rest there while you think, while you cycle through all your safe foods to find the least offensive of them. and when you whisper it against the soft, worn material of his shirt, he smiles down at you and says, “okay.”
diversity december taglist: @raeinyourdreams @meetmypointlessaddiction @chubbyhedgehog @yxtkiwiyxt @isepod @dis-plus-fanfic-reblog-writes @deaky-with-a-c
autistic!reader: @thegothempress @z0m3r-blud @yourlocalmerchgirl
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett fanfiction#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine fanfiction#logan howlett x gn!reader#logan howlett x gn reader#wolverine x gn!reader#wolverine x gn reader#james logan howlett#logan howlett x autistic!reader#logan howlett x autistic reader#wolverine x autistic!reader#wolverine x autistic reader#logan howlett headcanons#logan howlett drabble#wolverine headcanons#wolverine drabble#logan howlett oneshot#wolverine oneshot#wolverine logan howlett#x men#x men origins wolverine#x men 2000#series: diversity december
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saying "your people hunt us like animals" ekko wouldn't have agreed with what the hellfire squad did in zaun if he'd been down there, that he'd fight vi and caitlyn or attack piltover for gassing zaun up when his next line was literally "silco pays them to do it" is CRAZY WORK considering the hellfire squad, an alternative to a full scale armed invasion, were selectively using the grey and targeting the remaining chem barrons and silco goons - that's all ekko had been doing forever and his original reason to despise jinx so why would he care, he obv doesn't like the enforcers and recognizes piltover's disregard for the undercity but the firelights don't go out of their way to attack them bcuz that's not what they're there for... i didn't know the mischaracterization of caitlyn trickled down to ekko lol
the way i understood it the firelights' main goal isn't and has never been to be antagonistic towards piltover or to free the undercity (unlike silco or sevika and the jinxers, which is why it was hard for sevika to rally them up after silco's death), they're a faction aimed at dismantling shimmer, rehabilitating and housing the people whose lives it's ruined, they work internally to heal and help the average person make it by, not to start grand revolutions and revolts - silco and the chem barrons were an imminent and much closer threat to them
#arcane#arcane season 2#caitlyn kiramman#arcane s2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn arcane#arcane vi#vi arcane#vi#silco#arcane silco#silco arcane#ekko#arcane ekko#ekko arcane#firelights#arcane firelights
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The newspaper was a prop in the show... it's accurate. I don't have time to do a complete timeline right now but from what I recall they crashed. Three days later they found the lake according to Jackie. They jumped in cause they were sweating and gross and dehydrated but they were already complaining about the cold. Jackie walked in and immediately swore "Fuck, it's freezing". If you look at the sky it was cloudy and the lighting was cold and all washed out. Then Blood Hive, Jackie's complaining about the cold again, sees Lottie in the water, asks if she's cold, the sky is cloudy, etc.
They establish that it's late Autumn/early Winter really early on in the season is basically what I'm trying to say. Like, look at this, does this look like Spring/Summer weather?
A day or two after they find the cabin they held the shooting trial. They were out of food and the cabin food wasn't viable so we're left to assume they ran out of the airplane snacks. Then they hunted that deer and there was talk about it lasting them a few weeks. By episode 6 the land stopped producing fruits and nuts and when they did Doomcoming they were resorting to eating maggots they dug up off the ground and had resigned themselves to the fact they were going to starve to death (ergo the doomcoming moniker).
Another indicator was the Deer Lottie saw in episode 6 with the bloody horns. That deer was rutting, which is what they do in the winter months, usually from January on, after rutting season, but due to malnutrition and disease, and other factors may be earlier, like in November or December, which alligns with my theory. The deer they caught was shedding and it was diseased and full of maggots after all, and food was sparse, made even sparser by the yellowjackets and their hunting and foraging in the local area, which may contribute to an earlier shed.
Jackie had been giving up food to Shauna from that episode too. Van cracked a joke about it being beaver season which I know is just a joke but beaver season does actually fall in fall and winter, so it's ironically accurate with my theory. Taissa says in the next episode that the one animal they've seen in weeks is a dead sick deer, so presumably it's been a few weeks since they caught the live one. Misty proposes the animals migrated, which again makes sense in fall/Winter. And Taissa has her "[soon] it's gonna be dying-feels-like-falling-asleep cold" speech. All indicators that it's fall.
As for the baby/pregnancy, there's many possible causes for a distended stomach, and many a unicef commercial featuring starving people, even children, with distended stomachs. Her pregnancy is not a good metric for time because we don't really know the date of conception. We know though that Shauna had sex with Jeff more than once, we're just assuming that she only got pregnant the last time she fucked him, and not at any other point.
We know after Jackie died, it took two months for her to be consumed, and we know that Shauna seems to have given birth during the winter. What we don't know is anything about her gestation (like I mentioned earlier, she could have gotten pregnant way earlier) OR the birth. We assume she gave birth to a fully formed fetus, but we never saw it. For all we know she could have miscarried 3-4 months into the pregnancy. We never saw the baby so we really have no way of knowing, and the girls could have easily lost track of time and assumed it was coming soon, or she may have revealed she got pregnant earlier offscreen, or Misty could have deduced she was further along, or that winter could have been particularly long. They lived near mountains after all. It wouldn't be implausible for winter to last a month or two longer.
Either way, the pregnancy doesn't really prove much. It's way too vague a timeframe and we have too little information on it. Like if we knew exactly when Shauna and Jeff started to have sex, then maybe we'd have a timeframe for her potential inception date, but we don't really get that in the show so it's pretty impossible. All we know for sure is that had a miscarriage or stillbirth. We don't know anything about the baby realistically though, aside from the gender, which means it was definitely over something like 9-11 weeks in utero.
I did google it briefly though and it seems Winter in the Canadian Rockies (Where they reportedly crashed) lasts from November to April, but can be covered in Snow up til May, with the coldest month being January, so it's entirely possible for her to carry the baby til January, where it seemed the coldest and they got that snow storm, or even April, having gotten impregnated in November, and for her to deliver in January-April a 3-6 month fetus that was too young to make it.
I don't have time to really delve into this, but it still very much looks like they crashed in November.
five months jackie lived out there. five months she lived and breath. and they said that she died the day the plane crashed. jackie taylor has an empty grave inscribed with the wrong date.
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a mouse crisis christmas
pairing: Logan Howlett/Wolverine x mutant! f!reader (x original female character)
word count: ~1.1k
summary: Before Christmas, you and Logan have an unexpected house guest.
warnings/tags: soooo much fluff, able-bodied reader, no use of y/n, Logan's POV
a/n: a little christmas something from the logan x cat!reader universe! this is first and foremost a present that i wrote for @sizzlingcloudmentality because we came up with 'mouse girlie' together, i love you loads my sweet sweet friend. honestly idk if anyone else but our weird asses will even like this, but we thought kitten needed a friend, so here we are <3
dividers by @saradika-graphics who is a queen <3
notifications blog -> @guiltyasdavenotifs & full masterlist -> here
Something’s wrong when Logan opens the cabin’s front door, slipping off his shoes to not spread any melting snow on the wooden floors. Your own shoes are already placed on a towel, the tips still wet with the powdery coldness from outside. You rarely go outside when you don’t have to these days. Refusing even the smallest risk of getting your feet wet, your nose wrinkling at the mere suggestion.
More alarmingly, there’s a scent in the air that he doesn’t recognize. Mixing with yours, a fragrance that he could pick out anywhere. He hears your voice, warm, quick words interlaced with laughter. The only reason he’s not already by your side, defending you against the intruder.
He finds you in the kitchen, indeed not alone. There’s a woman, sitting on the counter, feet dangling below her. Almost drowning in one of the sweaters that you’ve knitted this winter. A new hobby, you had said.
She’s the source of the scent, there’s no doubt in his mind. Small brownish tufts of hair frame her face, a small pointy nose and dark eyes that flick up at his footsteps. Her whole body appears to be vibrating, nervosity emanating from every pore.
As he pieces her scent and her appearance together, the animal part of his brain provides an answer almost immediately— a mouse.
Not dangerous at all, if he had to guess. But still, an intruder in his home.
You step into his line of vision, and some of the tension eases from his body. It’s an involuntary reaction, one that only you can elicit from him.
He blinks slowly, gaze trailing over your face. Foolishly, he had thought you two were the only ones with such animal-esque mutations.
You’re wearing one of his flannels, and his fuzziest woolen socks. So your feet did get wet.
“I found her in the barn!” you begin to explain, the warm touch of your hands finding his shoulders, soft pressure against his still raised hackles. Keeping yourself between his body and the strange woman’s. His smart girl. “She was all alone and it’s freezing out there.”
“If you wanted a pet, you could have just told me.” An eyebrow’s arched, apprehensiveness coloring his expression.
You scoff, slapping a hand against his chest, but your grin still sparkles on your face, like you’re in on a joke and he’s not. “She’s not a pet!” you complain, indignant. “Don’t be rude, baby.”
The smaller woman is still perched on the wooden counter, wide-eyed, her head twitching back and forth between you both.
You turn around to look at her, your expression so full of fondness that it almost, almost makes him smile. He reaches out instinctively, caresses the soft skin of your cheek, warmth growing in his chest when you lean into the touch.
Taking a step closer, mouth tilting towards your ear, he can’t keep his own grin from forming on his lips. “Thought you’re supposed to eat mice,” he whispers, nipping at your earlobe in that way that never fails to make you shudder.
Your eyes widen almost comically and he chuckles before gently moving past you, towards that creature that apparently, the cat dragged in.
“So you were just scampering around in our barn, huh?”
The woman nods, a quick, jittery movement. She looks even smaller up close. Her eyes dart towards the front door and back to him.
“She didn’t have anywhere else to go! It's so cold outside, Lo,” you chime in from beside his shoulder. “And it’s almost Christmas,” you add with a pout, shiny eyes pleading with him. You know damn well how he can’t deny you anything. Never could. “She can stay for a bit, right?”
“Fine.”
-
Annoying, that’s what she is. Not the word you would use, of course not. You’re absolutely enamoured with her, almost joined to her hip these days.
He can’t help it, it still makes Logan smile to watch you giggle with her, the way your face lights up when you look at her. He had often worried that you might feel lonely out here, that you might wish for friends.
So this is good. Really, it is. But still.
He’s not jealous, of course not. Just… annoyed.
Annoyed with her tapping little steps on the wooden floors, annoyed with her squeaky little voice, annoyed with the fact that she ate all the nuts and olives stored away in the pantry, annoyed with her weird diet in general, loads of cheese, seeds and bread that you sweet talk him into buying, annoyed with her loud chewing and her obnoxiously large front teeth.
“But isn’t she just the cutest?!” you ask, hugging his body and bumping your face against his chest, your thoughts still revolving around the woman currently sleeping in the tiny guest room.
He grunts non committedly, reaching down to gently tickle your neck. You giggle and curl yourself tighter around him, breaking off into a long purr when he hits your favorite spot.
Warmth grows in his chest and he tightens his arm around your shoulder.
-
It’s Christmas Eve. Snow is swirling in the dark night behind the windows, but inside the fire is crackling, engulfing the three of you in warmth where you are huddled together underneath the tree.
It’s a ginormous one, a pain to get through the front door, but it was the one that you and the mouse woman had wanted, so who was Logan to say no.
Now, with a hundred lights glittering from it, starting right at the top where Logan had begrudgingly lifted the woman up on his shoulders so that she could place them under your careful supervision— he has to admit that it was worth it.
You’re leaning against him, the lights reflecting in your eyes and a wide smile on your face. The woman’s head rests on your lap, her body curled up in front of the both of you.
You and him usually forgo presents, content to just spend some uninterrupted time together with both of you certain that there’s nothing more you could wish for.
But when he had spotted a jar labeled as a ‘gourmet selection of nuts and seeds’ at the specialty store, he had grabbed it without even being that bothered by the ridiculously high price.
He was glad that he did when the woman’s face had lit up and in return, she had presented him with a self knitted scarf, a hobby that she had picked up from you.
It’s late in the night, snow still falling silently outside, when Logan is lying in bed, two sets of calm breaths beside him, occasionally interrupted by a small purr or a sleepy squeak.
He shakes his head, still wondering how he ended up in this situation, but he can’t be mad about it any longer.
thank you for reading! comments and reblogs are love <3
and merry christmas!
#janas fics#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#logan howlett fanfiction
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More Than You Could Ever Know - Part 2
Series Masterlist
Author's Note: Big bonus chapter for fans of Ben being obsessed with Her.
Title from All I Want For Christmas is You by Mariah Carey
Word Count: 9.2k
Chapter Summary/Warnings: Ben and Ryan go shopping, and you all try to find a tree. Usual Warnings.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, tooth rotting fluff, established relationship, Christmas Special
Part 1 - Part 3
Read on A03!
Ben wasn’t sure when stores got so fucking big. He’d seen big box stores before—despite what She insisted, he wasn’t a fucking dinosaur—but this was downright insane. It was a goddamn warehouse, and a poorly designed, maze-like one at that. There was no fucking logic to any of this shit, because Ben took a turn from what seemed to be an electronics isle and ended up surrounded by fucking cheese. It didn’t help that it was only him and Ryan, and they both needed Her for this modern navigation shit. But She was off doing her stupid surprise—Ben had tried to call it a secret again and She’d stuck Her tongue out and flipped him off—so they had to figure this shit out alone, together.
It wasn’t going that well.
“What the fuck are these.” Ben grunted, his eyes narrowed on the shelf in-front of them, filled with weird looking, round stuffed animals. And a mango. And one brown thing that seemed to be staring into his goddamn soul.
Ryan—standing at Ben’s elbows and tapping his fingers on the half-full cart—shrugged nervously. “I think they’re called Squishmallows?”
“Stupid fucking name. What’s that,” Ben gestured to the brown one. “Even supposed to be-“
“Pancakes.” Ryan mumbled. “I think?”
“Huh.” Ben glowered at the plushie, and realized Ryan had nailed it. Stuffed pancakes. She’d like stuffed pancakes. “Good work, kid.”
Ben grabbed the pancakes, tossed them into the cart, and tried not to drown in the hot, bright pride bursting in his chest at Ryan’s grin as he started to push the cart once more.
“Wait.” Ben halted Ryan with a hand on his shoulder, and pointed back to the shelf. “You want one?”
Ryan turned a little red, his voice a soft fucking whisper as his heart stumbled in his chest. “Yes, please.”
“Grab it and we’ll get moving.”
Ryan nodded, choosing one of the weird animals—Ben would figure out exactly what the fuck it was later, but his best bet right now was a cat—and they moved on through the store.
“We got your pants.” Ben scanned around the store, half his attention on what they were supposed to be doing and half on making sure no fucking pussies started filming them. “And the shit for dinner.”
“And Butcher’s shirt,” Ryan added, and when Ben glanced down at him, he was frowning at the cart. “Do you think he’ll like it? He has shirts.”
Ben shrugged. “Everyone has fucking shirts, Ryan. Butcher will just be damn grateful you got him something.”
Ryan hummed, sounding slightly unconvinced, his bod still tensed, so Ben kept talking.
“And the asshole is fucking impossible to buy for. Trust me, kid, the shirt was a good idea. Butcher will like it.”
“Did you,” Ryan looked up at Ben with widened eyes. “Did you buy him something?”
“Have to. Got him for Secret Santa. And, fuck, don’t tell,” Ben muttered Her name. “I told you that shit. Supposed to be a fucking secret.”
“I won’t.” Ryan shrugged. “I mean, you’ll probably tell her, right?”
Ben snorted, because he would tell Her. The first damn thing he’d do when She got home was pull her into a long kiss and grumble against her lips that he’d told Ryan. And She’d hit his chest and give him a flat glare, teasing him about really not understanding the secret part of Secret Santa, and that would be it.
And Ryan fucking knew that. He knew that She and Ben didn’t lie to each other, and that when she hit Ben it was never painful or angry, and when Ben rolled his eyes at Her it was because she was a pretty fucking brat with a smart mouth, and he wouldn’t have her any other damn way. Ryan knew they’d never hurt or be really mad at each other, and he was finally starting to fucking get that they’d never hurt or be mad at him.
It was why, when Ben shook his head and kept walking—never going faster than Ryan could keep up with—the kid’s heart stayed even, and his face remained relaxed. Relaxed for Ryan, so still a little fucking small and nervous, but without panic or fear. And that was as much as Ben could ask for, because he wouldn’t have Ryan any other way either.
“What else do we need.” Ben asked, keeping his vigilant watch on the store around them as Ryan responded.
“Um, I need scrabble for Kimiko?” Ryan mumbled Her name, and Ben’s whole fucking body roared with love from the goddamn sound of it. “Needs something too- as well.” Ryan corrected himself, and Ben chuckled at his puffed-out chest and toothy smile.
“Good work, kid.” He muttered, patting Ryan on the back. “Got ideas?”
“For-“
Ben said Her name, and She glowed a little around his skull. He really fucking missed Her, and if he couldn’t sense that she was a least half-way across the damn city he’d go find Her. Keep his gaze away from Her stupid fucking surprise, but also keep Her by his side. Make Her help him and Ryan with this shit, because She’d know what to do. She always fucking knew what to do.
He’d missed Ryan’s answer. Ben had gotten so lost in the instinct of Her, alight in his body, that he hadn’t heard what the hell Ryan was trying to get her.
“What.”
“Butterfly bush.” Ryan mumbled, staring sheepishly at the cart. “I read about them in my science class? They’re plants that attract butterflies, and you said she likes butterflies? I dunno-“
“Ryan.” Ben snapped, making his voice stern. He didn’t know how to do that soft, sweet shit She did, but Ryan seemed to understand his own, harsher words just as well. Understand that Ben wasn’t fucking mad, just firm in what he said. “That’s a good fucking idea. They sell them here?”
Ryan nodded slowly, his heart slowing to an easy rhythm. “I think so?”
“Well,” Ben shrugged, looking around for some sort of sign that said Perfect fucking gift for amazing wife. “Let go find it.”
It took half a fucking hour, but they found the butterfly bush. Stashed in the back of the goddamn store, real damn pretty and all fucking pink and green. She’d fucking love it. Ben grunted that to Ryan, that this was a damn good gift, and the kid looked like he might explode with joy and pride. Christ, Ben might explode with joy and pride. They’d managed to get everything She’d asked them to—gifts, clothing, food—plus some extra shit like the pancakes, nobody had died, and he and Ryan were doing an amazing fucking job knowing Her. Ben had all his gifts for Her lined up, and they were fucking excellent, but the butterfly bush was a stroke of goddamn genius. Ben wasn’t sure where the hell Ryan got his brains from, because Ben wasn’t an idiot, but he wasn’t that fucking smart, and Homelander had been a goddamn pussy dumbass. Maybe the kid’s mom, Butcher’s dead wife, but a smart lady shouldn’t have married fucking Butcher.
She’d say people might argue that She shouldn’t be married to Ben, but that she also loved him and adored him, and didn’t really fucking care what random fucking pussies thought about them. That maybe Ryan’s mom had seen something better in Butcher, just like She saw something better in Ben.
But that was why Ben was almost certain Ryan had to, somehow, against all fucking odds, be related to Her by blood. The kid was too generous like that, too kind like that, too fucking smart to be anything else. Ben could fucking see Her on Ryan’s face as they wandered through the store for Kimiko’s scrabble. See Her in the wide awe at all the stupid shit on the shelves, in the real, raw fucking happiness when they found what they were looking for.
See Her in the slight, hopeful gape on Ryan’s face as the kid halted in front of a terrarium, tracking the turtle inside with bright eyes.
Fuck, Ben could hear Her in Ryan’s voice. Hear that soft, gentle nervousness She had when she asked Ben for something. The tone Ben could make himself say no to if he tried.
Shit.
“Can we get it?” Ryan whispered, pointing to the turtle, swimming real goddamn slow around its tank. “Please?”
Ben scowled. That thing was real goddamn small—easily crushable if he and Ryan weren’t careful—and alive. It was fucking alive. It would need to be fed and cared for, and fuck Ben if he was going to do that-
“I’ll take care of it.” Ryan added, and Ben realized the kid had turned to look at him. Look at him with fucking puppy eyes. “I promise. It’ll stay in my room, and I’ll feed it and watch it and clean its tank-“
“Ryan.” Ben grunted. “Why the fuck do you want a turtle-“
“I like them.” Ryan glanced back to the tank. “They’re really peaceful. And, um, I just think they’re cool. I’ve always wanted one.”
Ben raised his brows. “Always.”
Ryan nodded. “I, um, I couldn’t get one. Mom said it was because I was too young, but I think it was because of, of the thing-“
“Fine,” Ben grunted, glaring at the turtle. He’d been going to give in anyway, might as well do it before the kid got all fucking sad in the middle of the store. Where random fucking asscucks could film it and put it online. Ryan could cry in the car, or when they were home, or when Ben was allowed to break phones and faces when people tried to exploit his son’s pain. Not when it could be avoided by buying a stupid fucking turtle. “But,” he said Her name, already reaching down the connection. “Has to approve this shit first. Deal?”
Ryan nodded eagerly, and Ben called Her name between their heads.
Benjamin. Is everything-
We’re fine. Ben glowered at the turtle, his voice a little lower than he’d like. Can we get Ryan a turtle.
There was a moment of silence before She responded, long enough for Ben to wonder if she somehow hadn’t heard him. What.
Ryan wants-
I heard you, Ben. But it’s December in Pennsylvania, where the fuck did you find a turtle for Ryan to want it.
Ben smirked into the air. Costco. This place is a fucking marvel, Sunshine, I got burger meat and pants-
I know how Costco works, my love. Why are you looking at turtles.
Ryan wants it.
She sighed in Ben’s head. I got that. He knows turtles can live for, like, twenty years, right?
Ben frowned. “Ryan, how long do turtles live.”
“Some can live for fifty years! And they’re so small, isn’t that cool?!”
Ben grunted, reaching back to Her. He knows. And he promised to take care of it.
Where does he want to keep it-
His room.
There was a beat of silence, and Ben knew She was considering it. He could practically fucking feel Her brain thinking.
I’m worried he’ll crush it, Ben. She mumbled in Ben’s head. He’s so much better at controlling his strength now, but if something happens on accident, he won’t forgive himself.
I know. But I’ll make sure that shit doesn’t happen. Ben watched Ryan carefully as he muttered to Her in the silence. I’ll carry it home, and Ryan and I can do some grip exercises to practice. He really fucking wants it, Sunshine.
She let out a long, slow breath in the sounds of the store around them. Okay. He can have one. But it’s your ass if something happens to it, Benjamin.
Ben grunted an agreement, rolling his eyes at the air, but he knew She could feel his affection, warm and stupidly fucking gooey in his body. Feel the radiance over his ribs when he nodded an affirmation at Ryan, and the kid grinned so widely it made something in Ben’s chest goddamn explode with pride.
“Thank you!” Ryan bounced slightly on his toes, grabbing Ben into a tight hug. “I’ll take good care of it, I promise. Thank you-“
“You’re welcome, kid.” Ben grunted, because She’d punch him if he just dismissed Ryan’s thanks. “Let’s grab it and get home.”
Ryan didn’t stop smiling for the rest of the goddamn week. She didn’t stop smiling for the rest of the week. She got home from Her secret, kissed Ben with a bright, happy hum Ben could feel everywhere around him, and let Ryan drag Her upstairs to look at the turtle.
“Oh, wow.” She titled Her head at it, crouching next to the tank with Ryan watching Her nervously. “That’s adorable, Ry. Have you named it?”
“Um, maybe? I’m not sure it’s a good name-“
“What is it?”
Ben could hear Ryan’s heart stutter nervously. “Bowser?”
She laughed. An amused, perfect, easy laugh with a pretty smile and nod that made Ryan’s heart ease, and Ben’s entire existence so fucking good.
“I like it.” She nudged Ryan’s shoulder with her’s, still watching the turtle. “It looks like a Bowser. And if we get a cat we can name it Koopa.”
Ben glared at Her. “We are not getting a fucking cat, Sunshine.”
“Fine,” She smiled at him, pretty eyes sharp and amused on his, full of love Ben could feel in the whole goddamn world. “A dog.”
He rolled his eyes, Her smile only grew, and Ben couldn’t find it in himself to be really, truly pissed. She was too fucking perfect for that. Everything was too fucking perfect for that lately. Because the next week passed in a blur, and it was almost all perfect, happy shit like this. It was kissing Her and helping Ryan wrap his gifts, eating dinner with his goddamn family every night, talking to them and watching tv with them and laughing with them.
Even work wasn’t entirely fucking dogshit. Kimiko and Frenchie were just a weird as before, but Ben was used it by now, and he’d even started to pick up some of that sign language shit. Enough to understand what gestures were names and when Kimiko was asking him a basic question about Her or Ryan. How they were doing—really fucking good—and if She would be picking Ben up from work. On office days She usually did, and they were always there for an extra damn hour as She and Kimiko got caught in a conversation, Ben and Frenchie standing awkwardly off to the side.
But Ben had adapted to that as well. Learned how to talk to Frenchie more, enough to ask him for a favor. A favor for Her that Frenchie had said yes to without hesitation, and they’d been working on for about two weeks now.
And everything was really damn good.
If every rogue supe in the country didn’t take a fucking break until New Years, Ben was going to start killing people again.
His whole damn day had been spent in the car. Four hours to New York and back, half the time it had taken to do the actual fucking mission. And the only reason they weren’t in and out of that in twenty minutes was because the bitch had decided to run, and she didn’t have a no-murder rule. And Ben was fucking busy. They had to get their tree today, Ryan had to be picked up from school, and Ben had to talk to Her about what the fuck they were going to do about Butcher’s gift.
He wished She was here. She’d have backed the Ice Lady—or Queen or Countess or Duchess, Ben couldn’t be fucked to remember—into a corner in ten damn minutes, and they wouldn’t have had to use Frenchie’s dogshit flamethrower to sedate the bitch and get her into the van. She wouldn’t have sneered and mocked the SFBI agents when they turned the Ice Lady in, or spilled coffee on their evidence for arrest, dragging out the process another forty minutes. She wouldn’t have missed the exit off the goddamn highway.
Actually, if Ben was being honest about the woman he loved, She probably would have missed the exit. She was amazing at fucking everything, but not driving.
But She was also fucking fast. Ben would’ve been home a damn hour ago if She had gone with them.
He wouldn’t have been ten minutes late to pick up Ryan either.
He hadn’t stop to change when Butcher dropped him back home. He’d grabbed the keys and fucking booked it to the school. Ryan would be okay by himself until Ben got there—and Ben would explain, because the kid wasn’t allowed to think She and Ben would ever fucking forget about him—and She hadn’t reached down the connection to ask why the hell Ben was late, so everything was fucking fine. Butcher and his reminders about getting the Ice Lady paperwork in before Friday could shove it, because anyone could fill out a damn form, and Ben might have been the one who actually caught Ice Lady, but Kimiko had been right goddamn next to him. If it was that fucking critical, she could do it. Ryan was more important.
He didn’t bother to lock the car when he parked it. The time it took to get Ryan wasn’t long enough to hot-wire, and if anyone tried to steal Ben’s property, he’d throw them onto the roof. And Ben’s property was a frost-bitten jacket and gun. Only a dumb fucking pussy would try and jack a car that had a gun.
Picking Ryan up from school was always a fucking trial. It was a nice school—She’d found it, working her perfect fucking ass off to make sure they treated Ryan like any other damn kid—and most of the kids weren’t entirely little shits, but Ben was one more goddamn incident from punching a parent. There were dumb ones, who seemed to think Ryan was some sort of fucking threat to their children, and the fucking pussies who’d been brainwashed by Vought and Homelander, who didn’t like Her. The school had received a petition to ban Her from school events, because She was a murderer and felon—She’d been fucking pardoned, and everyone She’d murdered goddamn deserved it—and She’d spent a handful of days quiet and hollow. Only eating when Ben put food in front of Her and told her to, only moving mechanically—her every gesture and breath over-controlled—and only sleeping when Ben held Her and ran his hands through her hair, muttering soothing words.
“You’re not a murder,” Ben had said Her name, kissing her brow as She clung to his chest and his whole fucking body felt ill. “You’re a good fucking person. Better than any of those pussies-“
“They’ve never,” She’d taken a long, slow breath, and curled her smoking hands in his shirt. “They’ve never killed anyone. Good people aren’t murders-“
“Good is respective.” He’d tugged lightly on Her hair, just enough for Her to look up at him. Pretty, sharp eyes that were glossy and heavy, that made something in Ben’s chest fucking contort and ache. “They’ve never had to kill Homelander, or Sage, or fight their fucking asses off to keep the damn world spinning. You did, and you didn’t ever fucking break.” He’d dropped his brow to Her’s, holding Her soft, tragic gaze. “You’re fucking perfect, and they’re just sad, weak fucking idiots.”
She’d nodded, letting out a strangled, slightly pleading sob, and Ben had understood. He’d just had to stay there, and hold Her until this passed. It always fucking passed, and Ben always stayed by Her side until it did. Until Her body went loose in his arms, and her hands drifted up to hold his face as she offered him a soft—but really fucking real—smile.
“Subjective.” She’d whispered, playing with the hair of his beard. “Good is subjective.” Ben had rolled his eyes, and Her smile had grown. “Smartass.”
She’d hummed, guiding Ben’s lips down to her’s, kissing him until Her heart was at an even pace again, and Ben could breathe again.
I’m your smartass, Pretty Boy.
Damn right you’re mine, he’d pulled Her lower lip between his teeth, smirking at Her breathy moan. I fucking love you, brat.
I love you too. She’d wrapped her arms around his neck, and Ben rolled them over, keeping Her safe and warm and happy under his body.
He’d kissed Her into the mattress until there weren’t any ghosts of horror over her beautiful features, until that presence of Her felt like a halo over his head.
Am I allowed to kill them. He’d said between their heads when they’d separated, his weight dropped carefully over her body as She played with his hair and he rubbed circles on her skin. Just fucking one, Sunshine. Let me kill one.
Maybe one.
Her answer had been quick, and Ben had looked up at Her with a surprised grin. You’ve got a fucking name?
I didn’t say that-
Is it Pigtail’s dad-
No-
Puppy Pack’s mom-
Ben-
Glitter Glasses-
Benjamin. She’d whacked his chest, giving him a stern glare that didn’t even make him flinch, because that was Her glare when she wasn’t really mad at Ben, but was just being a too kind, too perfect miracle of a woman. Learn the children’s names.
He’d given Her a flat look. I’ll learn their dumbfuck names when they stop acting like Ryan’s got the fucking plague. Who is it.
You’re not allowed to say anything. Or kill anyone.
Ben had nodded, watching Her carefully as she took in a long breath, burying Her face as she answered.
You know the girl who always wears the leopard-print boots-
Yeah. Cat Boots.
Georgia, Ben. Her name is Georgia.
I don’t give a fuck what her name is. He’d frowned, scanning over her pretty, nervous pout. It’s her mom. Fake Face.
She’d flushed slightly. Maybe.
In the moment, Ben had just grunted, flipped them over, and fucked up into Her until she unraveled with bright eyes and needy moans above him. He’d praised Her and kissed Her until she was only happy, then made Her dinner and grumbled from across the table that, if She wanted, he would kill Fake Face.
She’d dismissed him, because she was too fucking good and knew that Ben would carve himself open and crush his body under a million scalpels and boxes of gas before he left Her.
Fake Face should count herself lucky that She was so kind and forgiving and perfect, and even more fucking lucky that Ben loved his wife more than goddamn anything. That Ben wasn’t going to kill anyone, because She’d be sad about it.
But Ben still really fucking wanted to kill Fake Face. She was a fucking annoyance, looked at Ben like he was some sort of slab of meant, and looked at Her like she was the scum of the goddamn earth, when this lady couldn’t hold a candle to Her. It was like comparing a burnt-out matchstick to the fucking sun, and Ben didn’t understand how anyone—even a jealous, dick-riding plastic bitch—could look at Her and not feel like they were seeing something holy.
Fake Face had introduced herself to Her and Ben the first time they’d picked up Ryan. There had been quick handshakes, sickly sweet words from Fake Face, and grunts from Ben as he’d pretended to listen, mostly frowning down at Her. She’d been clinging to Ben’s arm as Fake Face asked him if he was really as strong as the stories said, and She’d felt heavy and sick in Ben’s body.
What’s wrong. He’d muttered down the connection, and She’d shaken her head slightly.
She hates me.
Ben had frowned at Fake Face, who was getting dangerously fucking close to touching him. Why the fuck would she hate you.
I don’t know. But touching her, it- She’d swallowed, nails digging into Ben’s arm. It felt someone was pressing a gun right against my brain. And my hands were itchy, and my skin felt wrong, and it was bad, Ben. I didn’t like it.
That had been enough for him. Ben had been happy to hate Fake Face just from how the bitch made his perfect, infinitely amused and kind wife look like She’d been kicked in the stomach. Then there had been more pickups. Pickups where it was just Her, or just Ben, and Fake Face seemed to have two separate personalities. With Her, she was crude and cold, and they’d figured out fast that the lady was, at least, a Vought supporter. Likely a Homelander supporter as well. And Ben had been ready to snap some fucking spines when the flirting had started. Unwelcome praise about how Ben was such a good man, for being there for Ryan—he’d defiantly tried to kill Ryan, only two years ago, but Fake Face seemed to forget about that part—and calling him Soldier Boy before correcting herself to Ben with fake giggle that hurt Ben’s ears, and the questions about how a man like him got mixed up in this whole mess.
It seemed like a pretty fucking simple answer. Ben had fucked up, and he’d repented, and now he was here. Still repenting, still with Ryan, always with Her.
Then Fake Face had called him Benjamin, and—after nearly breaking his jaw and her face—Ben had started being incredibly fucking careful with the timing of how he picked up Ryan, just to avoid this pest of a woman and her skin-crawling advances on him. He knew She did the same thing, and that enough made Ben’s blood feel fucking heated and wired.
He knew his reputation. He knew that he was a sex symbol, that he’d been the fuel of wet dreams for a damn near century. He also knew that, if he could, he’d rip all those fucking fantasies out of people’s minds on principle alone. Ben was fucking Her’s, and you couldn’t pay him with all the gold in the world to look anywhere but Her. It would be pointless anyway, because Ben couldn’t look away from Her if he fucking tried. She was everything beautiful in the universe, and then more. She was a force of goddamn nature, and alive in Ben’s body, and if his eyes were gauged out and his nose was cut off he’d still feel how fucking beautiful she was in a deep, critical part of his body near his heart.
Ben needed to figure out a way to shut Fake Face up for the rest of her fucking life. He wasn’t allowed to kill her, and they were still being careful around the school, so he couldn’t call her a plastic, disrespectful fucking bitch, and those were all his ideas.
He’d ask Her later. She’d have a way that didn’t end in having to explain to Neuman why they’d had to send a cleanup team to a high school.
Right now Ben just needed to stand—rigid and taut—as Fake Face walked up to him with a well-crafted, sickening smile and he waited for Ryan to get the fuck back to the pickup spot.
“Ben!” Fake Face chirped, bouncing to stand right fucking in front of Ben’s path. “I haven’t seen you at pickup all week-“
“My wife,” Ben grunted Her name, because he was going to say it at every damn possible opportunity. “She’s been doing it.”’
“Hm, well, I haven’t seen her-“
Well, She fucking hates you. “She’s fast. Busy.”
Fake Face hummed, tapping a finger to her chin in mock thought. “Ah, I understand. I’m a career woman as well, but my Georgia is always my top priority-“
Ben wasn’t allowed to kill the bitch. His fists were clenched and the glow in his chest would just have to be slightly released to disintegrate Fake Face, but Ben wasn’t allowed to kill her. “Ryan is our top priority.” Ben grunted. “She just doesn’t have time to fucking gossip.”
“I see. Does she have time for you, Ben?”
His vision was red, and he refused to fucking answer. If he answered, he’d spit and roar and draw attention. He didn’t fucking need attention. He needed to take his son home to pick up his wife, then take them both to get a Christmas Tree. A big one, that Ben would put stupid rainbow lights on and She and Ryan would smile at.
Fake Face seemed to realize Ben wasn’t going to respond, and switched the topic with only a slight cough. “Are you getting each other gifts for Christmas? My ex husband and I never did, he said that it was-“
“We are.” Ben snapped. “Her idea.”
It had been Her idea. She’d grabbed his face between her hands and said Benjamin, I love you very much, and if we don’t get each other stupid gifts for Christmas, I’ll kick you in the balls.
“Oh, well, if you need gift ideas-“
Ryan walked out of the school with some of the best timing Ben had ever goddamn seen, and something bright bloomed over Ben’s ribs as Ryan’s face split into a wide smile.
“Ben!” He shouted, closing the remaining space in only a few steps and pulling Ben into a likely bone-breaking hug. “You’re here!”
“Of course I’m fucking here,” Ben muttered, holding Ryan until the kid decided he’d had enough. “Butcher’s just a slow dumbfuck. Let’s go.”
Ryan nodded, starting past Ben to the parking lot, and Ben had almost entirely forgotten about Fake Face until she was grabbing his bicep, and he had to tense his every muscle to halt his instinct to slam her fucking head to the floor.
“What the fuck are you-“
Fake Face was giving him that cheap, twisted smile and those syrupy fucking words, not at all caring how she’d damn near just been killed. “Jewelry.”
Ben scowled, jerking his arm fully from her touch. “Speak fucking clearly-“
“Ladies love jewelry.” Fake Face said, giving Ben a pout that made her look constipated. “I’m sure your wife would love some.” Ben fucking loathes the way she said wife. Like it was a lie and not the only thing he’d ever been sure of. “And I’d love to help you pick some out for her.”
Ben looked Fake Face dead in the eye, not bothering to contain his disgust for her and that awful proposition, and never bothering to hide the sheer fucking pride and love that existed in his body for Her. He hoped She felt it back home, where Ben could sense her, peaceful and content and likely wearing one of Ben’s shirts. Maybe She’d ask Ben what he was doing, and he’d get to hear Her voice. Tell Her how he was defending her honor.
“She doesn’t wear jewelry.” He snapped, his eyes narrowing. “She’d fucking burn it off when I made her cum. Waste of money.”
Fake Face gaped, and Ben didn’t bother to wait for her to speak before he marched after Ryan, clasping him on the shoulder and steering him fully back to the car. He might have just made shit worse. Ben knew there was a possibly that Fake Face would think he’d been flirting, and would keep trying stupid fucking moves. But Ben was pretty sure he’d also made it real fucking clear that he wasn’t planning on fucking anyone but Her ever again. That was the whole point of marrying Her. Making Her and the rest of the world really fucking get that they belonged to each other, and anyone who tried to take them away from each other should be prepared to face the goddamn consequences. Consequences Fake Face better fucking understand, because Ben was weak compared to Her. Everyone was weak compared to Her. If She wanted to, she could burn out the sky.
If She had been present for that conversation, Fake Face might have ended up a husk of a bitch on the pavement. It was why Ben only told Her about this shit when they were in their room, where all She’d do is scowl and pout and glare at him, then start to climb up Ben’s body as She kissed him like she was trying to leave a mark. She knew there wasn’t a damn thing to worry about—Ben made fucking sure of it—but that didn’t stop Her from grinding in his lap or clawing at his chest when he finger fucked Her.
It was just another fucking perfect thing about Her. How She was a terrifyingly brilliant, sharp woman who adored the whole world, and She went slack and blissful under only Ben’s touch. How She wanted him, wanted Ben so fucking much she’d get all fucking angry at the idea of him being looked at.
“You’re a fucking person,” She’d grumbled once, Her face buried in Ben’s chest. “It’s, it’s rude-“
“I’m well fucking aware that I’m a person,” Ben had drawled Her name, tilting her chin up so she could see his teasing smirk. “I think you’re just possessive.”
She’d flushed. “I’m not possessive-“
“You are.” Ben had muttered, and leaned down to ghost one, soft kiss over her lip. “It’s fucking hot.”
It was. It made Ben’s whole body buzz and hum and fucking glow, that he was wanted enough for Her to be possessive. Not his body or name or image, Ben. Ben was fucking loved enough that She lost her damn mind when people acted like he was just a face. And then She’d turn around a call him Pretty Boy, and beg him to fuck Her, and it was so much goddamn better because She was the one doing it.
And Ben fucking loved Her. His whole fucking life was Her and Ryan. His whole damn purpose wasn’t Fake Face, it was finally getting that fucking tree. It was letting Ryan chose the tree—as long as it was a proper, green, massive fucking pine tree, Ben didn’t fucking care what it looked like—and telling Her about Fake Face as She was tucked into his side. It was making fun of that bitch with Her, and setting up the tree when they got home so Ben could get the lights up. It was seeing how beautiful She’d be into the shifting colors, how She’d probably look like some sort of fucking siren or painting when she was cast in shadows under the glow.
It was about finally having something so fucking good, and caring for it, and never goddamn losing it.
“How was school, kid.” Ben asked, dropping behind the wheel as Ryan pulled his buckle on. “Any shit I should know about-“
“No!” Ryan shook his head, his smile never faltering. “It was a really good day, Ben. We’re learning about Feudal Japan, did you know one of the first ever novels was written by a handmaiden?”
“No, I don’t fucking read. But,” Ben pushed on, before Ryan even had a chance to frown. “I damn near didn’t finish school. You’re a hell of a lot fucking smarter than that. Keep talking.”
Ryan didn’t keep talking, and when Ben glances at him he had a soft, nervous expression.
“What-“
Ryan mumbled Her name. “She said not to let you call yourself stupid.”
Ben snorted. “Fucking sounds like her. I’m fine kid-“
“But you’re not stupid!” Ryan protested. “You taught me how to use my powers! And how to grill! And about chemicals! I passed my science test because of that.” Ben could see Ryan’s chest puff slightly in his periphery. “Mr. Kline said he’d never seen someone eat the samples, not need to go to the nurse, and get a hundred percent.”
It was hard for Ben to fight the small grin on his face, and damn near impossible to stop the flash of pride through his body. “Fine. Tell me about the stupid fucking book.”
Ryan seemed satisfied, launching into a history lesson Ben really fucking tried to listen to, but didn’t understand a damn word of. He was practiced at this, though. Between Her and Ryan, Ben was a fucking master at grunting at all the right moments, nodding and shrugging like he got what they were saying, and letting them tire themselves out. Then he’d ask a few questions because it made their faces light up with joy, stash a few of their answers just to prove that really did fucking try. For them, Ben would always fucking try.
And She must have felt it. How Ben’s entire body was focused on Her, on Ryan, because She became colorful and alive around his head as Her perfect, musical voice hummed in his head.
You’re late, Benjamin.
Blame Butcher and Ice Lady.
Ice Lady?
Ice Lady. Ben repeated, frowning into the air. With the fucking ice-
Powers? Ice Lady with the ice powers? Ben could almost see Her pretty, teasing smile, and he rolled his eyes.
Brat.
Cunt. What did Butcher do?
Asshole was pussying around when we turn Ice Lady over. Made me fucking late to get Ryan.
But you-
I got him. Ben glanced over to Ryan, who had settled into his seat with an easy silence, bobbing his head slightly to the radio. He’s good.
Did you-
No incidents. Said today was good.
And-
He told me about his classes. Going well. Ben smirked at the road. Your faith in me is fucking astounding, Sunshine.
She scoffed between their heads. Fuck you, Ben, I’m just worried about him-
He’s fine. And I’d be happy to fuck you, beautiful, but you’re going to have to keep it together until tonight. Think you’ll survive?
You’re such an asshole.
You love me.
I do, you dummy. She sighed in the hum of the engine. Drive faster. I’m bored.
Ben grunted, and pressed the pedal down. He’d still be safe—Ryan was in the car, and Ben’s own need to see Her didn’t outweigh the kid’s safety—but he wanted to get the fuck home. Back to Her.
She was waiting in the driveway when they pulled in. Ben hadn’t even stopped the car when she moved to stand at the driver’s side, hugging herself as She waited.
She looked so fucking happy. Just as beautiful as She’d always been, just as perfect, but fucking happy. Bouncing slightly on Her toes as Ben grunted that Ryan should go put his shit away before they left, smiling at them through the window in such an easy, natural way it made Ben’s chest feel soft. Made him goddamn glow.
He’d barely stepped out of the car when She was on him. Pulling Ben down by his shirt into a long, deep kiss, sighing into his mouth when he picked Her up off the ground, and wrapping Her arms around his neck when they pulled apart.
“Hi,” She whispered, her smile all joy and adoration that made Ben fucking high. “Ready to get a tree?”
“Fucking born it.” Ben nipped at Her nose, carefully setting Her back down on the pavement. “I’m driving.”
She stuck her tongue out at him. “You can’t stop me-“
Ben gave Her an amused, flat look. “I could very fucking easily stop you, Sunshine.”
Her eyes narrowed as he raised his brows in a silent challenge. Big talk, Pretty Boy-
You know it’s not just talk, beautiful. He winked at Her, holding Her gaze. You’re not fucking driving.
But-
No. Ben kissed Her brow, grinning against her skin. Not a chance in damn hell.
Asshole.
Yep.
She rolled her eyes, leaning into his side and frowning at the front door of their house. Is Ryan okay? I know you said he had a good day-
He’s fine, Ben muttered Her name, shifting her against his chest and wrapping his arms around Her stomach. Fucking bounced out of the school like it was his damn birthday. Saved my ass as well.
Saved your ass? She tilted Her head back, frowning up at him. What-
Fake Face. Ben grunted, and She sighed. I still think you should let me fucking kill the bitch-
No murder, Ben. Not very Christmas spirit of you. She tapped her fingers on his arm, offering him a small smile. And I kind of like that these are our problems now. I can handle someone throwing themselves at you. And I get it.
Ben raised his brows. You get it?
Yeah. She shrugged, dropping Her head back on his shoulder, and Ben could feel all Her love rushing through his body. I mean, you’re very fucking pretty, my love. I’d throw myself at you.
He snorted. No, you fucking wouldn’t.
Yes I would-
Don’t lie, Sunshine. Ben held Her pouting glare with a smirk. You never fucking threw yourself at me, you barely damn liked me.
I liked you, She mumbled between their heads. I love you, Ben-
I love you too, brat, but you were never that pathetically annoying and desperate. You never fucking needed to be, he squeezed his arms around Her, kissing her brow and muttering Her name in the wind. You already have me.
She smiled at him, kissing the underside of his jaw. Very romantic, Benjamin.
He rolled his eyes, dropping his face to Her neck, sucking on that one spot. Shut up.
Even as She molded into him, whimpering slightly as Ben kissed up her neck and behind her ear, Ben knew She was fucking right. It was a damn good thing that the worst shit in their lives right now was Fake Face and Ryan getting changed so damn slowly. Not life or death, no screaming or blood, just Her swaying in Ben’s arms and his whole body feeling fucking alive in her presence. And neither of those worst things would be difficult to deal with. Fake Face was just an annoying bitch, and Ryan was finished in the next five minutes. Ben lived a life where he could kiss his wife until She was slack jawed and glossy eyed, guide her into the passenger’s seat of their care, and get his family out of the driveway before She had a chance to start thinking again. Now the worst problems were that they needed that goddamn tree, and Ben had to ignore Her pretty glare as he drove them to the farm.
You cheated. She grumbled in his head, playing with his hand in Her’s, and Ben smirked.
I don’t have a damn clue what you’re talking about, Sunshine. I’d never fucking cheat, I’m a goddamn gentleman-
Fuck you-
Not with Ryan in the car, darling. Ben’s grin became toothy and wide as She stuck her tongue out at him, his attention turning to Ryan’s pale face in the rearview mirror. “You good back there, kid?”
“Yeah, I’m just, um-“ Ryan swallowed, his heart a little uneven. “I’ve never gotten a Christmas tree before? Do we have to do anything?”
She twisted in Her seat, giving Ryan a sweet smile and soft words. “You don’t have to do anything. If you see one you like, tell us, and we’ll take care of the rest of it.”
Ben squeezed Her thigh as he glanced back at Ryan. “It’s real damn easy, kid. You’ll be fine.”
“What if I, what if I pick the wrong one-“
“It’s a fucking tree.” Ben gave Ryan a firm look through the mirror. “Long as it fits in the house and has branches, it can’t be wrong.”
Ryan nodded slowly. “Mom always got lights for our tree-“
“We got lights, Ryan.”
She blinked at Ben. “We do? When did we-“
“Last week.” He grunted. “When you were off doing your mystery shit.” Which you still haven’t fucking told me about-
And I won’t until it’s relevant, Pretty Boy. “Ryan,” She frowned into the air, tapping Her finger’s over Ben’s hand. “Was that enough for shopping? Because I need to go back to Best Buy for Secret Santa-“
Ben shot Her a look, his brows drawn together. “I thought you finished that shit.”
“No, I got your gift,” She gave him a sweet smile. “This is for-“ She cut herself off, and Ben rolled his eyes. She wasn’t fucking fooling him, she’d been nowhere close to slipping up. “I can’t tell you-“
“Shut the fuck up, Sunshine.” He raised Her hand to her mouth, pressing a kiss to Her knuckles. “Ryan, tell her about that book shit.”
Ryan’s face lit up, and Ben only got a light whack on his knee as she twisted to listen to Ryan’s repeated lecture about the Japanese lady and her book. She’d, apparently, already fucking known about the book, because of fucking course She did. The rest of the car ride was a conversation Ben tried—and fucking failed—to keep up with, and when they parked the sun had already dropped out of the sky, leaving them some of the last fuckers wandering the farm.
It was better like that. Ryan could wander—Ben keeping a careful ear on his heartbeat—Ben could keep Her tucked safely under his arm as She lit a careful fire in her palm, and none of them had to worry about invasive fucking pussies trying to talk to them. Ryan and Ben could even throw snow at each other without worrying about accidentally murdering someone.
“If I get hit,” She mumbled, her head leaning on Ben’s chest. “I’ll kick your ass, Pretty Boy.”
Ben snorted, another ball of snow already in his fist as he scanned over the tree line, waiting for Ryan’s next strike. “What if fucking Ryan hits you, you’re not going to kick his ass-“
“Is it Ryan’s job to protect me?”
Ben gave Her an amused grin as she blinked at him with fake fucking innocence. “You’ve got a smart fucking mouth, brat-“
She shrugged. “You love it- Ben!”
He’d hauled Her up his chest, swallowing her squeak of surprise with a deep, sloppy kiss and turning his body to take the bullet of Ryan’s snowball.
“Fuck, Ben, I’m sorry-“
She and Ben both pulled back from each other with wide eyes, and Ben grunted as She half-climbed up his body to stare at Ryan.
“Did you just say fuck?”
“Um,” Ryan’s voice was far too damn nervous, his heart rapid, and when Ben adjusted his body to see the kid, he was flushed and gaping. “I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry-“
“I’m not mad, Ry,” She pushed out of Ben’s hold, offering Ryan a reassuming smile. “I just didn’t expect it.”
“Am I,” Ryan looked between Her and Ben with wide eyes. “Am I allowed to swear-“
“Of course you’re fucking allowed to swear,” Ben grunted, pulling Her back under his arm. “Do we look like goddamn hypocrite pussies to you, kid?”
“No?”
“Then swear as much as you fucking want. But,” Ben raised a finger, narrowing his eyes at Ryan. “You have to go find that tree.”
Ryan nodded, and his heart sounding a little more steady, and bounced back into the trees.
When Ben looked back to Her, she was smiling at him. A real, loving, soft smile that made Ben’s whole body pound and riot with Her. Just fucking Her.
What-
You’re a good dad, Ben. Her smile widened, so fucking adoring it might kill him.
It’s not that big a damn deal-
No. She held Ben’s hand over her shoulders, letting him guide them after Ryan. It is. You’re an amazing, handsome, grumpy old dad. Ryan and I are very lucky to have you.
Ben only grunted, because he was fucking lucky to have them. For them to forgive him enough to let him stay, to offer him their trust and love when they were the only two, truly fucking good people in the world. Whatever.
She glared at him, but let it go, and they walked in silence for another few minutes—Ben’s whole existence only Her and Ryan’s heartbeats, just as fucking calm as they should always be—until she tugged on his arm.
I got an early gift for you, by the way.
What-
Butcher. I figured out what you can get him. I’ll show you when we get home.
Ben frowned into the dark. You’re getting his, and mine, and your secret fucker, and shit for Ryan.
Yeah. She shrugged. But those last three were really easy.
He raised his brows. Your secret shit was easy.
She hummed. Yep. My person’s really predictable, and loud about what they like. You just have to be around them for five minutes and you’d have figured it out as well.
It’s MM.
I’m not going to tell-
Annie.
Ben-
Hughie.
She sighed. Ben, I’m not telling you.
Ben narrowed his eyes at Her. It’s fucking Hughie.
I said I’m not telling you, cunt. She whacked his chest lightly. So shut the fuck up and drop it.
It was defiantly fucking Hughie. And Ben would’ve gotten Her to admit it—with enough teasing words, grumbled praise, and long kisses Ben could get Her to tell him fucking anything—but Ryan reappeared with a wide, bright expression.
“I found it!” He bounced on his toes, grinning between Her and Ben. “It’s that way, and it’s really big and spiky.”
She nodded, tilting Her head at the direction Ryan had pointed to. “Ben, if you go with Ryan, I can go find the tree-cutter people-“
Ben scoffed, keeping Her pressed against his side. “Don’t be fucking insane, Sunshine. Let’s go, kid.”
Ryan glanced at Her—Her attention focused on Ben with a heat he could feel over his ribs—but started walking, Ben pulling Her after him.
Ben-
I can get the tree, he muttered Her name, glancing down as he squeezed his hold on Her. We don’t need some pussy with a fucking saw.
Are you-
I’m fucking positive. He kissed the top of her head. Trust me.
She sighed, but nodded, and grew loose and easy in Ben’s body.
And he was right. Ryan presented the tree to them—he’d done a damn good job, and when Ben told him so the kid lit up like the fucking sun—and Ben barely grunted as he ripped it out of the ground.
He started moving without a damn word, supporting it on one shoulder, and smirked at Her open, pretty fucking gape as he twined his free hand into Her’s. Her heart was fluttering in Her chest, her beautiful face slack with need, and Ben felt something in his chest try to pound out of him, into Her.
Don’t fucking drool, Sunshine. He winked at Her, waiting for Ryan to be in his view before he started the walk back, and She just swallowed, Her voice breathless between their heads.
Fuck you-
I will, darling. When we get home I’ll throw you around as much as you fucking want. He shifted his grip on the tree, and felt his dick twitch as She half slumped into his body, her gaze pure fucking love and want. Swear it.
Ben never got to throw Her around. She’d nodded, tugging Ben to walk a little faster, and paid for the tree with fingers tapping on the counter, but they’d barely made it halfway back to the house before She was asleep in the car. It wasn’t even that fucking late, but Ben saw Her body slump in the passenger’s seat—Her presence in his head turning into a natural, eternal and peaceful glow of beauty—and heard Her heartbeat slow a moment later. When he glanced in the rearview mirror, Ryan was knocked the fuck out as well, and he smiled.
He left the tree on the roof when they got home, and got them both to bed. He unbuckled Ryan first—She’d kill Ben if he left Ryan in the cold car alone—and carried him up to his room with careful steps.
“Ryan,” he muttered, setting the kid carefully on the bed. “Ryan, wake the fuck up.”
Ryan’s eyes blinked open, still clouded with sleep. “Ben, wha…” He trailed off with a yawn, and Ben sighed.
“Need to get changed, kid. And brush your teeth.”
“What’s goin’ on-“
“You’re going to bed.” Ben grunted. “But you’re not doing it in fucking ice-covered clothing. Change.”
Ryan nodded slowly, starting to shuffle around the room, and Ben returned to the car.
She was so fucking beautiful. There were glittering drops of melted snow on Her eyelashes, and her mouth was parted as a small amount of drool fell from Her perfect lips. He swiped his thumb over it, She barely stirred, and Ben realized she was knocked the fuck out. And he wouldn’t be waking Her up for the fucking world.
Ben carried Her upstairs—just as he’d done with Ryan—but when he reached their room he set Her down carefully, and stripped her himself. Careful slow movements that didn’t disturb her, changing Her into his shirt—not bothering with underwear—and tucking Her under their covers before going to check on Ryan.
The kid had passed out without turning his lights off or getting under the covers. Ben fixed both of those things, brushed some hair from Ryan’s forehead, and checked on that stupid fucking turtle so Ryan wouldn’t wake up to it dead. It was sleeping under a sun lamp with a damn worry in the world, and had more than enough food to last into the next three damn years. Ryan had been keeping his word, and the thing was growing like a fucking monster. And the kid seemed to damn love it, so Ben gave it a little fucking extra food as a silent, stupid thanks for doing whatever the hell it was doing to make Ryan smile.
She was still asleep when Ben returned. Curled into his side of the bed, Her face pressed into his pillow, and soft, incoherent mumbles falling out of Her mouth until Ben joined Her. She let out a blissful sigh as he pulled Her into his arms and tangled his legs with Hers, her pretty face buried in his chest and that flower shampoo she used like a goddamn drug. Making his body relax, because it was right where it should be, and his brain lull into an easy sleep.
Easy fucking sleep he’d get to wake up from in the morning without screams or tears, with his perfect wife still clinging to his body and all Her love alive inside of him. She’d get that promised fucking when She woke up as well, and he’d make everyone pancakes for breakfast, then drive Ryan to school. He’d grab the tree when he got back, wait for Ryan to get home before he put up the lights, and She’d watch them both with a smile before telling Ben what he should get Butcher.
Then it would be Christmas, and he’d get to give Her his goddamn amazing gift, and She’d kiss him, and everything would be so fucking good.
Ben’s life was really fucking good.
End Note: I don’t care if they don’t sell turtles at Costco in my universe they do.
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@manicjk @lordofthunderthr @artemys-ackles @brtodd @ej13928
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#godmadeaterribleerror#canon divergence#tooth-rotting fluff#pre-established relationship#soldier boy x reader#the boys#soldier boy#Enemies to Friends to Lovers#slow burn#angst#x reader#reader insert#romance#canon typical violence#canon divergent au#the boys amazon#fluff#soldier boy x you#soldier boy fanfiction#the boys fanfic#soldier boy smut#soldier boy x female reader#jensen ackles#jensen ackles characters#idiots in love#No Love Lost (the Boys)#tooth rotting fluff#a very special episode#christmas special
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Full thoughts on season 7! (Or at least, as many as I can remember, sleep-deprived and emotional as I am)
Starting off positive: things I liked!
THE RUTHARI REUNION WAS EVERYTHING
Runaan's gentle kiss to Ethari's hand? The way the camera rotated around them for their kiss?? Their hug afterwards??? Ethari's little "my heart"???? This was worth the six-year wait
The moonfam in general was one of my favorite things about this season. Runaan calling Rayla his daughter again, his and Ethari's unconditional support of her, the way they interacted with Callum... it was exactly what I dreamed of
And speaking of Runaan: his speech to Ezran in 7x09 will be living in my head forever. The way his tears weren't pretty, they were real. The was he said "I'm alive". It was such a stunning conclusion to his arc
On that note: the voice acting? Spectacular. Callum and Soren had me in floods of tears when they met in the ruins of Katolis. And don't even get me started on Zubeia during her fight with Avizandum
The lighting and music were also so on-point
TERRY'S REDEMPTION ARC LET'S GO
His speech to Claudia was stunning
Also, his "hello, Zuko here" moment made me cackle
I love that he and Soren are on their way to friendship, I always thought they'd get along
I also really liked that Aanya was present throughout the season! Every time she was in an action scene I was screaming
I thought the plotline with Miyana being pregnant was really interesting, because it presents a moral dilemma that isn't explored a lot. Plus, the way Karim reacted, calling the baby his heir and never his child, was very telling of his mindset and priorities
This is going to sound really weird, but I loved the moment of Rayla taking up Runaan's bow to fulfill his promise. Like, obviously it's tragic and I was in tears, but also, it really shows her respecting Callum's agency? She was able to respect his choice and put his wishes above her own needs, and it was cool to see
I'm so glad they addressed the bird theory. There was way too much of a focus on Pip for it not to go somewhere
Things I disliked:
There were times when the animation really threw me off. Like, after Callum froze all the guards in 7x02 and they were trying to break free, they were just... tapping the ice with their weapons. Really slowly. It kind of axed any urgency. And during Ezran's speech at the end, some of the characters in the background were just... done in a completely different style? I'm sure it was a reference to something, but as someone who doesn't know what that was, it really took me out of what was supposed to be an important scene
There was a lot of explaining things over and over. Yes, we know Aaravos never lies, you don't have to keep telling us. Yes, we know the Orphan Queen wielded the nova blade, you don't have to keep telling us. Yes, we know people are not all good or all evil. You used to be really good at showing that instead of making speeches about it once an episode
Also just a lot of monologuing? Like, why did Callum have to explain in detail to Aaravos his plan to trap him before he did it? I know we the audience needed to know but from a strategic point of view, it was... not the smartest he's ever been. It would have made more sense if he was trying to explain it to Rayla, I think
It didn't really... feel like a finale. They left a lot of loose ends open, and beyond that, it felt like there was very little payoff for things that had been set up throughout the arc. Why did we spend two seasons looking for the nova blade if we were never going to use it? Why did we spend all arc foreshadowing Callum's corruption if it was never going to happen? I get that they left it for arc 3, but even so, the resolution of an arc should still feel like a resolution, much like arc 1 did
(Also, are we ever going to come back to that hallucination Callum had? Like, is he not at all concerned by the fact that he had a conversation with himself with seemingly no magical involvement?)
I wish we had gotten to see Anya act like a person. It was great to have her around, but it felt like she was in queen mode the entire time, and I'm really curious about who she is beyond the crown
Finally- the thing that I disliked the most was the way things with Callum, Ezran, Rayla, and Runaan were handled in 7x02, because it made it very hard for me to root for Callum and Rayla afterwards. I totally understand that Rayla has an attachment to Runaan and Callum has an attachment to Rayla, but neither of them seemed to actually consider Ezran at all. Like, here is this twelve-year-old boy, who just lost the home he lived in his entire life. Who lost his father at a very young age and, as a direct result, was forced into a responsibility that he absolutely should not have had to carry. I feel like at the very least the people who are supposed to love him the most could say, "hey, I understand that you're angry" instead of treating him like he's totally unreasonable. And then! They just leave him! A twelve-year-old who just lost his entire home! Who has literally no other family! And whenever they talk about mending things, it's never, "oh, I'm sorry I left, I'm sorry I never took time to validate how you were feeling", it was just "we're family, we'll find our way back to each other eventually". That's not how it works. When there's a hurt like that, you don't just stop being angry without coming to an understanding. I love Runaan, and I wanted him to be free and happy, but I also think that he did in fact commit a murder (yes, technically just of a bird, but he didn't know that) and it's reasonable to expect him to face some consequences. Even if it's just, like, community service. You can be merciful without condoning
But just to be clear: I have absolutely no ill will for anyone with different views on this plot point. My frustration with it is more from a personal perspective than a writing one- my dad was killed a few years ago, so I'm siding with Ezran from an emotional standpoint. But I thought the plot was worth mentioning, since it really affected how I viewed the rest of the season
Overall, as a season, book 7 had a lot of moments that I really loved and will be rewatching very often. But as a potential sendoff, it didn't really leave me with much of a sense of closure. Fingers crossed for arc 3, I suppose!
#the dragon prince#the dragon prince spoilers#tdp spoilers#tdp#tdp callum#tdp rayla#tdp ezran#tdp runaan#tdp soren#tdp terry#tdp ethari#tdp zubeia#tdp claudia#ruthari#rayllum#ray rambles
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With the FTIYS results going to be the big blast at the end of the year, thought I'd post my Art Year in Review today!
Imma be honest, I am so suprised how much I drew this year. With me starting my first full time job plus celebrating and therefore working for my music group's anniversary, I thought I'd neither have the time, energy nor motivation to draw a bunch. Glad to see I proved myself wrong lmao.
Gotta hand it to Haikaveh for having a chokehold on me for HALF A YEAR. That is so long for me. But come June it seems my brain couldnt properly latch onto anything. Well, MH Wilds is coming in February, soooo, I have a feeling next year is gonna have a MH phase XD
Also a big suprise is the many animations/vids I did this year. Last year was pretty comic heavy, which was the case this year too, even if most never got posted, but to think I would make a, for my standards, proper 2:30 minutes long video, never would have guessed. I also probably made my best animatic yet. While the Harpy Hare animatic is my pride and joy of this year, I gotta hand it to the UT video for getting the best comments Ive ever gotten. To this day, I still get so many "How dare you?!" and "Ouch, didnt need you to break my heart." Not to mention how often Ive been uninvited from UT themed birthday parties.
All in all, I did not really make many improvements, but I think i took it a bit easier this year and through that found some new techniques and brush settings that make work a lot easier now.
Aaaanyways, lets see what 2025 is gonna bring!
#art year in review 2024#2024 art summary#grimmy's art year in review#fanart#oc#comic#video#genshin impact#haikaveh#neuvifuri#monster hunter rise#pokemon#little nightmares#harpy hare#undertale#horizon zero dawn#trigun#south park
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Every once in a while I will look through my animations folder and remember the basically finished ONE animatic I made that I now feel it is far too late to post ♥
#I was going to make it into a full animation but never did#and then it was like a year later and I was like SHIT missed the mark#THEN investigations came out and I was like baller I should finish it now and post it#and then didnt ♥#watching II fan content on youtube put ONE stuff back in my feed and now Im going insane over that again#ONE WAS SO GOOD#if any of you saw my II fanart and it made you curious about object shows PLEASE PLEASEEEE watch ONE by CheesyHFJ instead
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YALL I HAD A THOUGHT
This is open for literally anyone to PLEASEEEE do i dont care how it is so long as you share it with me:
I NEED A NEVER STOP BLOWING UP ANIMATIC TO THE SONG "THE VILLAIN I APPEAR TO BE"
#and listen i know. As much as id love to make it myself I have neither the ability nor the resources nor the time#If yall need ideas for what to do for each part of the song hmu i have a full storyboard in my head#Or dont ask me and make it ur own vision#But holy fuck i can literally see it in my head#Its so perfect#nsbu#d20#dimension 20#animation idea#never stop blowing up#going insane with the tags cuz i need some talented ass person to find this and make it their baby#dropout.tv#brennan lee mulligan#Spotify#Why the fuck did spotify tag itself
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when the slowburn makes the ship extra cute~~~
#kimikawaii this week for sure!!!!!! (has been saying that since july)#ik the nghy payoff will be ✨sweet✨ but it’s kinda funny how hw are slowburning nagisa’s role in the series as a whole#mans has a grand total of 3 songs to date and only 1 has a cv ver#place your bets what do you think will come first? nghy duet or ariken duet#t h o u g h. ariken is also kind of a slowburn but we all knew they’d get together since ijiwaru release (shoutout to the og miku ver)#some say that ariken is still not canon in the novels to this very day#can’t believe we got arisa’s future career aspirations reveal before ariken canon in the novels smh#but i digress!!!!!!!!!!!! nagisa needs more action and attention!!!!!!#he did have kind of a ‘the bus came back’ moment with the izumo collab but we never saw his face again after that#(full cast merch doesnt count bc p. much everyone’s included in them except for the school nurse and kako)#so. all im saying is: slowburn nghy by all means. just dont slowburn nagisa’s character arc aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#now that mona mania has cooled off (to a degree) and chizusweep has mellowed out (somewhat) it’s shiranami’s time to shine!!!!!!!!#y. yeah. ik it’s harder to market him bc he’s a literal average (albeit handsome) joe but that’s part of his charm!!!!!#i mean!!!!! he can cook!!!!! he stans ft4!!!!! he’s devoted to the girl he loves!!!!!! he’s a dreamboat!!!! what more could you ask for?#but. i do have to say that nghy developments have been kinda awkwardly handled as a whole… esp with heroine ikusei#i think nagisa should’ve been introduced in heroiku or something… since he was planned from the start of hiyori’s development…#maybe they were trying to pull a ‘2nd love wins’ kinda parallel with kthn? but the ascana retcon made everything awkward huh…#i think it could’ve worked out in the mv-verse. like if they’d placed heroika+sukiuso after the fight+make up in herotaru#so the timeline would go smoothly from heroiku -> herotaru -> heroika#with hiyo realising that she’d be better off focusing on work and track after the asuka debacle + chizu fight#like a ‘forget romance!!! i gotta work hard and run hard!!! omg wait nagisa wdym you love me???’ kinda thing#but the [redacted] anime p much cut + pasted the asuka arc with the nagisa visit and. hm.#is this just an excuse to blame the clumsy handling of the nghy arc on the [redacted] anime? m… maybe…?#but it all still could’ve kinda worked out if they’d shifted the timelines around a little. y’know. since sukiuso mv has nagisa visit in oct#idk i think having hiyo learn how to doll herself up from lxl for her first crush (asuka)#and then using what she learned to yassify herself to meet up with nagisa would’ve been neater?#like a ‘hey look nagisa :) i applied what i learned from my pals :)’ kinda thing#or maybe chizu and juri could’ve helped her with the nagisa dressup scene post-herotaru fight… but i digress!!!!!!#hmmmmmmmmmm… well. this has gone way off topic… anyways nghy canon and cute that’s all byeeee#the dude from gamushara
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who up getting autistic over a podcast theyve never seen
more under cut idk if theyll format or not... beware
some of these i just did some of these are old
some of these are the drawing style thing i did sooo.... in order... : FIRST THROUGH FOURTH IMAGE peter drew those :-) FIFTH rumi drew that one :-) SIXTH exandroth drew those :-) SEVENTH peter drew that one :-) self portait EIGHTH rumi [bad at art edition] both NINE and TEN i dont remember if they were ment to be peter or just me goofin... so picjk ur poison LOL ELEVEN thats peter LAST THREEEE meeeeee :3 9-10 and 12-14 are the older ones everything else i did last night / this mornin'
#jrwi#jrwi apotheosis#angelstone#sqlumi#................i prefer sqlumi.... why did name it angel stone thats like exandroth + peter not rumi + peter its confusing to me#im sorry i watched the angelstone cut like half a year ago#IM SOOO AUTISTIC ABOUT THEM YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA MAN YOU HAVE NO CLUE SOSHAKSHLSXHLDHDJDJKRKFKF#i cant contain it anymorw im going to post my cringe#quite a few of these ones are from my little handwriting drawing things where i make up their handwriting and art style tee hee#i think rumi either SUCKS ASS at drawing or can decently draw in an anime esque style#i imagine peter has a lil bit of artistic abilities... he did paint a ton of mug paintings if i remember right????#he aint the best but he can do it#thanatos has 0 skill because he has never drawn anything ever until this hypothetical situation where theyre drawing and writing this all#exandroth adapts peters skill to an extent#peter tries to follow the rules taught to him about writing as a child to a T soooo he has generally neat handwriting if hes thinking abt i#but if hes tired or just out of it idk#you cant get one word man that shit is just complete chicken scratch even he cant figure it out sometimes LOOLLLL#rumi also has very neat handwriting HOWEVER i love the idea that she hams it up to be really swirly like that one girl in elementary#thanatos is very stiff and neat might as well just be font...#exandroth is either writing in full caps or alternating between whatever ver of a letter he wants to write at any time#VERY heavy handed and goes over every line like 3 times#when writing his name EVERYTIME he writes exandroth archangel of retribution everytime#if you guys wanna see what i have so far.... you can ask.... hehe#theyre my ocs at this point man i havent seen the damn campaign#i would just make them my ocs but my brain immediately loses interest whenever i do that uuuuggghhhhg#i mean i have a beast moomin furry thing peter and an object oc peter bur#*but like idk#btw i have like waaayyy more to say but i reached tag limit <////333 tumblr hates autistic people real#ill just retype it all in the next post ^.^*#archive
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i think its really fitting that the "this shit........ is so ass :'') " anime girl reaction image is from oshi no ko because that is also what my expression was like the whole time while reading the entire last third of the story
#theres like what. one or two chapters left? we are almost free. we are almost free#i hope they make the adaptations better. its such a weird ass manga#like it started solid albeit full of hashtag anime weirdness so a bit of a hard sell#and then like for a while there it was just like a genuinely good showbiz drama. the best arc was the stageplay arc we know this#although one thing about it that ive always noticed. for a manga with a premise about like. isekai idol revenge thriller. its like#so uninterested in idols? like while the showbiz entertainment industry drama was pretty great at times it like. ignored the idol side#like it did a tiny bit of stuff here and there but by the second half it had completely forgotten about it LOL#im curious if the anime and live drama will expand that more. the anime has lots of like tie in idol songs ive noticed#MY THOUGHTS on how the finale's been going: the character motivations are genuinely incomprehensible to me now like#the antagonists motivations and character and everything got so deflated i couldnt track it anymore#BUT i do think its bold to kill off ur protag like that. was it done well? not really no LOL#BUT it was bold. i think my eyes were so glazed over around then that such a last minute turn like that... it kinda ruled <3#i think theres been leaks about the last chapter or two? which i havent seen yet. but yeah rn thats where my opinion is#still love the music from the anime tho even tho i never watched it. also again even though the character motivations got like#so muddled and deflated by the end that i dont even know what the eye star symbolism is going for anymore -#I STILL think those eye stars rule thats a really great 00s shoujo manga esque character design choice#edit: TURNS OUT THE LAST CHAPTER WAS OUT i read it.... :') this shit. truly was ass
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god, grief hits you at the weirdest fucking times
#was brushing my teeth and started crying thinking about my aunt#sometimes i forget she’s gone because it just seems too wrong#she was young she was healthy (before the cancer) she was more full of life and energy and compassion than almost anybody i know#and it just feels impossible that a presence like that can just. disappear.#they say one of the first things to go is their voice#as you start losing memories of them#but i don’t think i can ever forget hers#i hear her in the way my mom speaks sometimes too#and the way i talk to dogs sometimes#my mom says she sees her in my hands#she had such a big heart and yet she did work that could so easily break someone#but she stayed kind#she fought for the kids she helped#she fought so fucking hard and she cared so much and she never stopped caring no matter how much it hurt#and she loved and stayed joyful despite seeing some of the worst sides of humanity#sometimes i just need to talk about her#because i know she’ll be remembered by everyone who knew her#she’s not the kind of person you forget#but it still feels like that isn’t enough#like she should have had so much more time to bless so many more lives#my mom started a community fund on the island in her name#she hasn’t decided fully yet where the money will go#Tan cared about so many things but especially the foster kids the queer youth and all animals#especially wolves and horses which sounds cliche but it made so much sense for her#one of the things she was fighting for most in her last few years was making sure indigenous kids in the foster system#had ways to connect with their cultures#either by making sure they stayed with family who could take them in and making sure the family had the supports they needed#or connecting them with community programs run by indigenous leaders for indigenous youth#i’m a lot calmer now after all that typing#personal
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hello fellow girls still playing animal crossing: new leaf
#honestly it's the best ac game#i really didnt think we'd get another bc this was just Tops#controversial but i really dont like acnh that much.. i like it bc it's ac but it's missing so much life#except in the sound design wowee!! i hate the soundtrack with a fiery passion but those footsteps and wind go HARD#i also think crafting and things breaking etc.. save it for minecraft.#ANYWAY#i started a new nl save and im so full of joy and wonder#i forgot how good this game is but my hands never forgot how to play 🥹🥹#final ac thought as excited as i was that ac got popular bc i spent my childhood w no friends to play online w the amt of people i see#misunderstand game mechanics and not even look to Ye Olde Forums to figure them out makes me wanna gatekeep SO BAD#“i rebuilt every villager's house in my own to calculate their hha score” did you know you can actually calculate it yourself and that#people on forums have already calculated the feng shui point plus the individual point values of each item already#please.. please .#animal crossing#acnl#lessons of the hand and the mouth#WAIT ONE MORE THING. acnh has incredible lightning. ok thank you
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OC Time! :3c
What is the relationship between two characters like and who's someone that comes and shakes that up?
OR! Alternatively (since I just had one I cant talk about yet) what's a big character or story breakthrough you've had recently? :0
Okay, since I'm working on revisions of my book EOTA today, I've got that story on the brain and I'm absolutely gonna talk about Kirsen!!! Specifically the relationship between Kirsen and Imogen, which gets touched on over a couple different chapters, but ultimately just can't be explored in-depth during the book itself. Also......this is gonna get long, fair warning AKDHDKFJDK
So, to start it all off: At the start of EOTA, it's only been a handful of months since Kirsen and Imogen ended their 1-2yr relationship. I think in the original draft I put a hard number on it, something like 6 months since they broke up? But I think it'll read better if I leave the period more up to interruptation. Anyways, the point is that Kirsen is someone who grows very, very attached to people and things are left unresolved.
Because it says from the get-go, from the very moment their past relationship is mentioned, that Kirsen and Imogen didn't break up because they stopped loving one another. In fact, they still have very strong feelings for one another. It's just that they recognized that they simply couldn't provide what the other needed and deserved in a relationship.
Imogen's aging mother is essentially the person in charge of their town, Pointes. She runs everything and keeps the town safe and functional. While she could have chosen anyone to take her place, she raised Imogen with the idea that she was going to inherit the position. This is the culmination of her entire life so far and really, Imogen does very much want the position.
Kirsen is someone who...well, there's several parts of her personality that come together in an unfortunate way. She was raised with a hunter's disposition; she needs to be out, she needs to be moving, she needs a job, she needs a prey. And unfortunately, Kirsen has a lot of trauma that she has been desperately trying to avoid acknowledging her entire life. If she stays in one place too long, she can't have a constant distraction, she can't hide her bad days from the people there, and she risks people trying to force her to acknowledge it.
Imogen needs a partner who will be there by her side, who will be the support she needs while she takes on a very taxing, pivotal role. Kirsen needs a partner who will be willing to travel with her, who will recognize her need to run and be there to pick up the pieces when everything does catch up to them. And no matter how hard they try, they are both intimately aware that they cannot provide those things for one another.
Ultimately, I think they both recognize this and yet cling to the hope that something in their lives will change and, magically, all of their differences will disappear and they will be able to live together happily.
[Enter Lucida] :)
Kirsen is now having to work with Lucida to save the world. It provides a great distraction from her struggles with Imogen- except that Kirsen thinks Lucida is attractive and falling for the person you're going on a perilous quest with is not exactly the brightest move. So now she's juggling feelings for two different people and knowing fully well that neither situation is ideal for her currently.
And there are specific scenes where Kirsen is clearly leaning into her attraction to Lucida so she can forget about Imogen, only to then have specific scenes where she (for instance) makes out with Imogen bc "surely this will absolutely help me not fall for Lucida and have no emotional repercussions at all".
Its- at the end of the day I think the three of them have such interesting dynamics with one another (and that's not even touching on Imogen/Lucida being weirdly passive aggressive and jealous of one another bc they both ALSO like Kirsen)and I can only scratch the surface of it in the book itself, bc technically the romance plays second fiddle to the Saving The World Shit ya know? I could write essays on these three idiots, I love them
#tysm for the ask friend!!!!!#and for giving me the opportunity to talk about a ramble that i have rolled around in my head for ages now#and did not have much outlet for#os: entrails of the animals#oc: kirsen pinewynn#oc: lucida cyprius#oh shit wait imogen doesnt have a tag bc i never gave her a last name...fuck...lets go with#oc: imogen#for now and i'll add a new tag if/when she gets a full name#if i wasnt a coward i'd make lucida/kirsen/imogen canon#but ive got a lot of internalized shit wrt my being polyam that i gotta work thru#and also i cant fit it into book one#technically there arent really spots in the rest of the trilogy either but.........#i really am lowkey trying to figure out if i could make lucida/kirsen/imogen work feasibly w the story im trying to tell#long post
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