#I was an edgy teenager and I look back and cringe

[the-thot-clown]

you didn't like Wendell and Wild?? .0.

Artistically it's a beautiful movie, the music is great, I love Raul with all my heart, the nun and the guy in the wheelchair are cool and the leather daddy demon is fine as hell

BUUUUUUT that wasn't enough to make me like that movie, it was all over the place, it feels like they tried to throw everything against the wall to see what sticks but nothing really did. They could go with just one plot and develop it further, maybe explain more all the hell maiden? Like what is it, why certain people can be a hell maiden or what with the bear, what with the octopus, why all the amusement park in the belly, and so on.

Also, and I know some people will twist this Twitter style, I really can't stand Kat... I know it's all about her trauma and she's an edgy teenager and blahblah but I just don't like her idk that's just me, I can't stand edgy teenagers.

[auspicioustidings]

Ae Fond Kiss - Part 1

Winsome Wee Thing

Summary: This is the start of a story from this concept. You fall in love and you learn loss more ways than one. Words: 3.9k TWs: major character death (temporary), miscarriage

Parts: 1 2 3

You and your boyfriend's Lieutenant disliked one another immensely and immediately. 

For you it wasn’t so much that the hulking idiot was in a balaclava, although you found the skull pattern so teenage boy edgy that it caused a cringe deep enough to feel right through your molars, it was the obvious dismissal he had for you. For Simon it wasn’t so much that Johnny’s newest pretty little bit was a smart arse, although he could practically feel the ‘not like other girls’ radiating off of you in waves, it was the obvious disdain you had for him. The first impression set the tone for what became a horrid relationship.

–

“This is my Lieutenant, they call him Ghost but I believe he prefers to be called-”

“That’ll do.”

There was something about the way he cut the puppy dog that was your boyfriend off that riled you a little. 

“Nice to meet you, Ghost. Is that your gamer tag or something?”

“Never been one for games. You a gamer girl?”

“Not enough to have such a cool nickname.”

“Oh I’m sure we could come up with a nickname that would suit you princess.”

Gaz, who you did like, spent the rest of the night meditating while Johnny remained clueless to the simmering hostility between the two of you. Price didn’t really seem to know what to make of it all, but you found you had a natural respect for the Captain and as time went on, he was the one that could always tell you and Ghost to knock it off if he could see a fight brewing.

–

Johnny had been so excited to introduce you to his team and his team to you and the only thing you and bonehead could seem to agree on was that you would pretend to be civil when Johnny was around. So the jokes were underhanded but could be brushed off as humour, the vitriol was kept for when his back was turned, the eventual birthday presents were tactfully meant to appear innocent but actually be biting insults and the all out war that was had around a pool table was played off as healthy competition. 

If it has been anyone but John MacTavish you’d have dumped him purely so you would never have to see Simon Riley again, but fuck you fell hard and fast for Johnny. You didn’t even fully remember your first meeting. It had been a blind date and you thought you had been stood up so got well past merrily drunk at the bar of a nice restaurant. You had not been stood up, your date had broken down in the snow and in the hours you had been drinking the flurries had become a full blizzard. But that wasn’t going to stop Johnny. In the middle of a backroad with a blizzard beating down and no signal to call he had hiked his ass all the way to you, getting there just in time to catch you wobbling out the door. 

He had been a gentleman, hadn’t taken advantage. You woke up the next day with a handsome man bringing you breakfast in bed and apologising profusely for the whole thing. He had slept on your couch and admitted sheepishly that he had walked you home. From what little you did remember, you had made it difficult by starting a snowball fight and wanting to make snow angels every 5 minutes. You remembered the scent of pine and a roaring fire that enveloped you when he had bundled you in his jacket, breathing in and being transported to a log cabin in the Scottish highlands in winter, safe and drinking something warm with a hint of whiskey. 

If you hadn’t already been falling for him after his bashful teasing that morning, you were flung head first into it when you spent the next week looking after him when his gallantry earned him the worst cold known to man. He was a big baby when he was sick and that combined with the terrible sense of humour that he had made you desperate to learn more about him. 

–

“Ye cannae be mean tae me, I’m naw long for this world!”

For such a large man, he really was like a little kid bundled up in blankets and whining.

“Uh huh, that’s very valid and very sad but you still need to take your medicine.”

“I was never any good at swallowing, maybe ye can give it tae me as a suppository.”

Ridiculous man.

“Aww come on, swallow like a good boy and maybe we can talk about that suppository when you’re better.”

“Fuck, where have ye been all my life?”

His loopy grin nearly made you plant a kiss on his lips regardless of how ill he was, but instead you just ruffled his hair when he knocked back the pills and wondered how you were ever going to keep from loving this man.

–

The second date he had left you with a fond kiss at the doorstep after a wild night of earning enough tickets at the arcade to win him a little plush skull toy. He had been obsessed with it when he had first seen it, had told you he needed to win it for his Lieutenant. You thought that was adorable and had put your frankly suspiciously good reflexes to work absolutely rinsing the whack a mole for every ticket you could get from it. Of course had you known then that Simon Riley was the biggest ass on the planet you’d have hoarded your tickets and gotten 300 packets of Haribo instead (or so you’d like to think, but you knew deep down you could never have denied Johnny knowing how bright he smiled when he had traded the tickets for that stupid plush).

By the third date you wanted him so badly that you felt like a bitch in heat. You started to think that maybe you were making a fool of yourself with how calm he seemed whenever you sneaked a touch or whispered a filthy promise. God you liked him so much, it was killing you that maybe he didn’t feel the same. You needn’t have worried as it turned out, date number 3 was when John MacTavish had completely ruined you in a way you had not expected.

–

“This was really nice” you said, a bit embarrassed if you were honest and avoiding his eyes after he walked you to your front door.

You had been a menace the whole evening. You had never been some sex kitten but fuck he just brought it out in you without even trying. He probably thought you were ridiculous now with how you had tried to be all sultry the whole way through dinner. Fuck, your hands had wandered something awful during the movie as well and you felt the humiliation from it burn from your ears to your toes. He didn’t want you the way you wanted him and you had pathetically thrown yourself at him. He probably couldn’t wait to lose your number. 

“Open the door.”

Shit. He sounded almost angry. The first guy you had really liked in a long time, maybe ever, and you had totally blown it by being over eager. You shakily unlocked your door and blew out a breath, prepared to go inside and cry over a glass of wine. Instead you were grabbed by the waist and slammed against the door to close it behind you so fast it made your head spin. 

John MacTavish’s tongue was down your throat and he had your wrists pinned above your head in a bruising vice grip. You had only just found the sense to kiss back when his lips were gone and instead his teeth were sinking into the delicate skin of your throat. The whine you made at that was all animal, as was his answering growl. 

“Next time ye misbehave like that I’m going tae bend ye over the dinner table and fuck ye hard and proper in front of all those nice, fancy people.”

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. You had never gotten so wet so fast in your life. The nice lace panties you had on under this dress were soaked right through. He bit off a curse and your legs nearly gave out when he suddenly let you go and backed right off, dragging a hand roughly through his hair. 

“Fuck, sorry. Dinnae hate me, I wanted tae… our first time I mean, I had it all planned oot. Which makes me sound like a creepy, presumptuous bawbag. And now I’m being a fucking reprobate and pinning you tae the door without even asking first.”

Oh my God. You could not just fall in love with a man after 3 dates. And yet looking at his blown out eyes, how his body thrummed with barely contained lust for you and how he nearly vibrated with the effort of holding himself back because he wanted to treat you right… you had fallen in love with a man after 3 dates. 

“I thought…” you said, your hand coming to rest on your flushed chest as you tried to find the words. “I mean at dinner and then at the movie, I um… well I wanted you to, you know. I thought maybe you didn’t want to? Which is fine obviously. I mean if you didn’t want to.”

The whiplash from going from lust to humiliation to lust and back to embarrassment was not something you were enjoying. You looked at him, he looked at you and after a few long moment the two of you burst into laughter. What a bloody pair you made. He came over and wrapped you in his arms, that wonderful scent that just gave you a feeling of contentment deep in your bones sinking into you.

“I want to. Was hard for the whole film, couldnae move that popcorn bucket or someone was getting an eye oot. Wanted tae spank ye red raw for all that teasing” he confessed into your hair, so sincere and blunt about it that you weren’t sure your pussy was likely to forgive you if you didn’t go out of your way to tease him next time. 

“Wanted?”

He laughed, probably because you sounded somewhat like a petulant child, and leaned back, hands going to gently cup your face. Looking into his eyes felt like a gentle falling. Falling into a warm bed on a cold morning after a hot coffee, falling into the first fresh powdery snow of the year, falling in love with a man you hardly knew but felt so much like coming home. 

“Was planning on asking ye tae come with me up North. Got a nice cabin in the Highlands that I usually rent oot since my Captain is always going on about having a backup plan. Want it tae be perfect.”

“You don’t have to go to all that trouble.”

Nobody ever had before. In your somewhat limited experience men wanted to get to fucking as soon as they could and while a few had made sure you came first, none had ever put much thought into getting you into bed in the first place. It just sort of happened. You would never have said you were insecure, but at that moment you felt the crushing weight of feeling that you didn’t deserve this man making such a grand gesture just to get inside you. You already wanted him. And there was no way he wasn’t experienced, how would you ever be good enough to warrant all the effort he was going to?

“Hey, look at me beautiful” he said quietly, thumbs rubbing soothingly across your cheekbones and coaxing your eyes back to his. “I really like you.”

Those four words ruined you entirely. John MacTavish put his heart out there with such simplicity that it stunned you. He could have thrown you on the bed and fucked you rough and savage and you’d have enjoyed it, but instead here he was butting his forehead lightly on yours in affection despite his evident arousal because he wanted more than that. 

“I really like you too.”

Instead of fucking, he held you while you cried like a baby, overwhelmed by the care he took with you. He only made it worse when he whispered to you how you deserved to be treated with adoration. He called you beautiful, bonnie thing, mo leannan, winsome wee thing (that one made you laugh). He refused gently when you wanted to take care of him that night, instead laying you down softly on the pillows and lapping between your legs to bring you to slow orgasm after slow orgasm until you were boneless and sated, slurring your speech as he bundled you in his arms and you spoke about everything from your childhood pets to your great hopes and dreams until you drifted off into the best sleep of your life.

–

Your first time with him inside you was in that cabin like he had wanted and it had been the most perfect few days of your life. He had made sure you felt safe and comfortable, insisting you gave the location to your friends and going over maps of the area with you, pointing out where you’d need to go to get signal to check in with them. He bought ingredients for all of your favourite meals and stopped for a snack run on the way to boot. He showed you his test results but stressed that he was putting no pressure on you either way and if you did want to have sex he would have condoms if you preferred. And after all that he made it clear that you did not have to have sex with him if you didn’t feel like it. Johnny would be happy to just hold you for a weekend. As soon as you arrived he taught you how to use the sat phone if there was an emergency. The voice on the other end was gruff but soothing somehow, safe sounding (that at least was something that never changed about Simon, despite not liking the man, you always felt safe with him).

You were ready to explode by the time he finally laid you in bed. He stroked deep and slow inside of you, steady and solid and torturous. You understood then the difference between fucking and making love. It was the first time anyone had ever shown you the latter. 

He then proceeded to show you the former in great detail on every surface inside the cabin and on quite a few outside. Your pussy was battered and your clit bruised in the most delicious ways. Your throat was raw from screaming and from being fucked. After a lifetime of swearing up and down it was never something you were interested in, you wound up practically begging for his cock in your ass because there was not one part of you that you did not want dripping with him. And of course he was only too happy to make sure you understood everything he would do to prep you by letting you do it to him first. You couldn’t fucking sit down for a full day after he had indeed spanked you red raw for the teasing you had done on that 3rd date.

A week later you met his family, the week after that his brothers in arms. And then he was gone and you were so worried about him that you constantly felt nauseous. It took years for you to be able to settle when he was deployed, to not spend the whole time imagining him not coming home to you. Because by that time that was what you had built together, a home.

You and Kyle became friends throughout the years. You really did like him, he was easy going and would laugh and let you bitch about Simon whenever you wanted. Captain Price came to feel like an older brother. He was there whenever you needed him, whether it be a car breakdown or because you were in a panic about a handsy coworker (poor guy had broken both hands in an accident the next weekend). And Simon? Well not too much changed there, you dealt with each other when you had to and were it not for your shared love of Johnny you suspected you’d have killed one another. 

At least until Las Almas.

–

You didn’t know how you were going to tell Johnny. In fact, you probably wouldn’t. What good would it do? It had sorted itself out. That was how you tried to think about it. Food poisoning had made the pill ineffective for a day, you had gotten pregnant unplanned and unwanted and had lost the baby before you’d even started showing. It didn’t matter that while Johnny was somewhere being a hero you had heard a tiny heartbeat at the doctors. You told yourself over and over again that you didn’t want it anyway. You tried to think about how awful everything felt all the time. The morning sickness, the fatigue, the mood swings. 

It was probably just the shock of it, waking up wet from the blood and thinking you were dying. If your first thought had been that you’d rather you die and the baby lived then you tried not to dwell on that. She would have had Johnny’s eyes. He would have wanted a mohawk so he could match his daddy. You forced an image of you telling Johnny and him being upset and not wanting a baby. It was useless. You knew that man. You loved that man. And that man would have gently made sure you wanted to keep it before bursting into happy tears and kissing you senseless.

You couldn’t tell him. You couldn’t break his heart the way the last few months had broken yours. Maybe it was selfish, to want to keep this pain for yourself when you knew beyond a doubt that he’d be desperate to share it, to take as much as he could from you and turn it to gentle comfort the way he always did when you were hurting. But you wanted to be selfish over this.

It was a whole new pain when you answered the door and Ghost was standing there. Your knees went from under you and you collapsed with the weight of why he would be at your door. Why would he be here without your Johnny? It was the first time Simon Riley caught you. 

You never spoke about the way he held you gently and told you that Johnny was ok, he was alive but injured. He made you laugh through your tears and snot by telling you what a bad patient Johnny was being, how he was about ready to beat up every medic on base to get back to you because “I dinnae need fucking morphine I need tae eat my bird’s pussy”. His Scottish accent on that impersonation was truly dreadful. 

Simon never thought he would find himself comforting you. He didn’t like you, he never had. Johnny had never been so serious about anyone and it drove him nuts that you made him so happy. Happiness like that was an easy thing to ruin and you could ruin it if you wanted, that scared the shit out of him. It was even scarier when Johnny had shown him the ring he was planning to offer you. 

He never told Johnny how you had broke in his arms that night. How you had told him about the miscarriage in the dark, bled your pain all over him and let it sink into his skin. He had taken it gladly. In the light of the morning you went back to your dislike of one another, but something had changed in the dark.

–

You never did tell Johnny. You and Simon settled then on some sort of begrudging respect for one another. You still argued and bit at each other, but with the knowledge that now you would be part of one another's lives forever through Johnny given that only a few days after he came home he had slid a ring onto your finger.

Frankly you were fucking terrified when you came off of the pill. The only thing that got you through it was, unbelievably, Simon mumbling to you in the pub over a game of pool that you were going to be good parents. Of course Johnny had told him you were trying, but you found you didn’t really mind as you grumbled back an awkward thank you. 

You could have strangled Johnny for having such strong fucking swimmers. You hadn't expected to get pregnant almost as soon as you were off birth control and it meant your wedding dress had to be altered to account for the small bump there. The bump he could not keep his hands off. Honestly the man was already insatiable, but fuck he loved you pregnant. He was already talking about more kids and you hadn’t even had the first one, he fucked you and groaned about wanting you pregnant all the time. 

Your husband, something you thought you’d never get sick of saying, drove you mad once again in the late stages. You were hornier than ever and he was determined to treat you like you were made of glass all of a sudden. He certainly still gave you as many orgasms as you demanded, but gone was any rough and feral fucking. You loved making love with Johnny, but fuck if you didn’t miss the fucking. 

You’d never tell Simon it had been your suggestion, not under pain of death. Neither of you had been attached to any name in particular, but you knew how much Johnny loved his Lieutenant. He was his best friend and they owed one another their lives several times over. There was a good chance that you owed him your life. Your husband had kissed you with so much love when you had asked if he’d like to call your son Joseph and after talking about it late into the night you had agreed that the little human inside you was your wee Joey. 

A wee fucking bruiser is what he was, coming into the world kicking and screaming. Ten perfect fingers and ten perfect toes. You joked that he must have screamed so loud he had damaged his own ears when he was referred to the audiology clinic after a second newborn hearing test. They stressed that you shouldn’t worry over it, but you hadn’t been anyway. Joseph was the strongest most wonderful thing you had ever seen, whatever came of it he had two parents who were going to make sure it never made his life anything less than a grand happy adventure.

Johnny had hated leaving him. Price had hated to ask it, had sent you enough flowers to start your own florist in apology. You understood though, your husband was off saving the world after all. Your heart was in your throat when he kissed Joey’s head and then kissed you soundly. Something felt off with him. The kiss felt different somehow, mournful. Maybe it was just a trick of your memory, hindsight tainting what you hadn’t known was the last time you would see your husband.

–

Simon Riley caught you a second time. John MacTavish was dead.

[disgustingtwitches]

MDNI

I just want somebody to treat me like somebody

Neighbor!König x reader where you struggle with seasonal depression during the winter, that is only being worsened by moving to a new city without friends or family. Then you meet König, a kind neighbor who offers you support and much needed companionship. König helps you because he's a good man. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

[DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT, self harm, depression]

The winter drew out the worst in you. Seasonal depression. It was always there; just got worse around the holidays. So cliché. Moving to a new city and having zero friends or family certainly didn't help. Isolated and too depressed to go out and meet anyone. You were going crazy. Locked yourself in your bedroom with blackout curtains, crying for hours on end. Never good enough. Pathetic. Useless, useless, useless.

Your chest ached so bad you felt like you were having a heart attack sometimes. Despair swallowed you whole. You did the only thing that made you feel better. Even if you didn't do it for years, today was especially unbearable. Finding a sharpener and taking the razor out, you drag it along your skin. Snot and tears running down your face. Pain helped. You needed more. So you do it more. It was clean lines at first. Horizontal. Up your thighs. On the outside of your forearms. Up the side of your hands. It was a comforting suffering. Then vertical cuts over the horizontal ones. Mortification of the flesh. Cuts on the wrists. Not enough to do any actual damage. You learned from last time. Didn't wanna die, just wanted to not wake up the next day. A just punishment for being so unbearable to everyone, even yourself. You cringe at the way you liked watching yourself bleed, made you feel like some edgy teenager. Something was satisfying in it though.

You barely leave the apartment, only going out to work or get groceries. Always wore long sleeves. Couldn't hide the cuts on your hands though. It made your coworkers uncomfortable. It was tense whenever you came around, but nobody said anything. Why would they care about you? You don't even care about yourself.

You walk home one particularly hard day after a customer yelled at you and someone else pointed out the cuts that peeked out from under your sleeve. It starts pouring as you head home. You run as fast as you can to your apartment complex, getting cold and wet. What a fucking miserable place. Always raining. Walking up the stairs and fumbling with your keys. You drop them. It's too much. Your whole world crumbles. Tears well up in your eyes as you scramble to pick up your keys to open the door, hands trembling.

"Are you okay?"

You snap your head in the direction of the Teutonic voice. Impossibly tall, burly guy. Keys in his hands, ready to open the door to his place. A neighbor. You never saw him no matter how many times you passed each other, you were too miserable to notice honestly. Head always down, people mostly gave you uncomfortable looks anyways if they even noticed you.

He noticed you though. You radiate sadness and despair. He can almost see the perpetual rain cloud that looms over you. Your presence is heavy. Watching you almost break down was finally enough to make him say something.

"I'm fine."

You respond, choking back tears. This close to full-blown sobbing. You were not fine. Something about his words makes you ache. Maybe it reminds you that he's the only person to check in on you since you got here. You wanted pain, enjoyed it even. But it was distressing this time, made you kind of scared of how far it would take you this time. Even if it was three simple words, they comfort you. You need that from somebody. Anybody.

There was an uncomfortable silence as you stood in front of your doors. You look up into his eyes. They looked tired, like he worked long and demanding hours. He can't help but feel empathy for you. It was clear you were suffering. Defeated eyes begged, 'save me, save me, save me'. Can't help himself anymore. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth. At least he was doing something good. He clears his throat.

"Kaffee?"

He offers. You bite your lip, never wanting to be a bother. Not wanting to take up space or feel vulnerable in front of another person. But you need this. More than anything. You've been screaming and screaming for someone to help you. It's enough to drive anyone mad.

"Alright."

You turn to him, as he unlocks his door, and lets you step in first.

"Shoes, bitte."

You comply, looking around. Spotless. Looks like something out of a magazine. Not a single thing looks out of place. Has to have OCD or something. He ushers you to the kitchen and shuffles around, making your drinks.

"How do you take yours?"

He grabs milk from the fridge, bending his imposing frame oddly.

"Sweet and light."

There are no more words said. He sets down the cup in front of you. Leans back in a chair on the other side of the table, sipping coffee. He examines you. You avoid his gaze. Both of you shift in your seats, awkward. Both of you are afraid to say something. It's like this until you finish your drink, setting the cup down.

"Thanks."

You instinctively pull on your sleeves to cover your hands.

"Natrülich. Anytime."

There was more that he wanted to say. Couldn't find the words though. What was he supposed to say to a stranger? It was enough for you though. At least in that moment. Someone noticed you. Made sure you were ok. Kind of. You stand and slip your shoes back on before walking to your apartment. His door was still open. You play with your keys, hoping there is more to be said.

"You can take my number if you'd like."

He pulls out his phone as you turn around, trading contact info before fucking off to your dismal abode. He watches you disappear into your dark apartment. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

You curl up in bed in the dark, the usual. Holding your phone, staring at the screen. König. Never heard that name before. Look it up out of curiosity. The fuck? Did he seriously put his name down as king? You're just kind of confused staring at your phone for a while before crying yourself to sleep like always.

Ever since he made himself known, you'd notice him. Going up the stairs, heavy steps in his steel-toe boots. Sometimes you'd be getting home at the same time. Sometimes getting your mail as he was checking his. Hm.

Always quick 'hi's' and 'bye's'. You've yet to text him. You're sure he just gave you his number because he felt bad. Maybe obligated? Whatever. You were in the middle of a breakdown, cutting up yourself. You get a ding from your phone. An unfamiliar sound. You never get texts. Or calls. You look at the screen. König. Still can't believe he typed that.

Hope you are doing well.

He knows you're not. He can see it in your face whenever you walk by; eyes sunken from the constant tears, fresh and old wounds peeking out from under your sleeves. Looked like you were withering away even more so than before.

Thanks

Intrusive thoughts flood your brain. Never good enough. He just pities you. Maybe can't stand the way you make him uncomfortable whenever you pass by with your insufferable self.

Kaffee?

He doesn't know what else to say. Doesn't want to intrude. Can't help himself. Every time he sees you he aches a little.

Sure

You wash your bleeding arms before slapping some gauze on them and throwing on a hoodie. You're in his place again, this time in the pristine living room. Him on a recliner, you on the couch. He clears his throat.

"So, what do you do?"

His voice trying to be as soft as he can be. He's intimidating standing, but he tries to be more mollified sitting down across from you. You stare at the floor.

"Barista."

You're not one for conversation. Neither is he.

"You?"

Your voice a morose whisper.

"Freelancer."

His answer is purposely ambiguous. You're curious, but don't push. You set your coffee on the accent table next to you. He stands before you even put it down, placing a coaster under your cup. How anal.

"Do you want to..."

He racks his brain. He's not one to host. Doesn't know what to do.

"...watch TV?"

It's the only thing he can think of.

"Sure."

Better than being alone, you reckon. He asks what you want to watch. You think for a moment. You haven't had any interest in anything lately, nevermind sitting down and watching something. Suddenly, something springs in your head. It's ridiculous. He wouldn't want to watch that. Fuck it.

"50 First Dates."

It was what you watched when you were younger. Put it on whenever you felt down. 'Gossamer thin,' one critic said 'but lots of fun nevertheless.' His face is neutral.

"Never heard of that movie."

He types it out in the search bar. Of course he hasn't, must've been at least 20 when it came out, definitely too grown and not the type to watch shit like this. You were kind of regretting it now. What a cringey fucking movie. He puts it on. It's kind of embarrassing watching it. There are no words exchanged. Eventually, you stop caring about what he thinks; you just appreciate the movie. There's a familiar emotion as it finishes. Always adored the ending, made you feel good. Or at least better than before.

"Interesting."

He says, impassive. Eyes glued to the screen. You feel the need to defend yourself but don't.

"Well..."

You stand; wanting to crawl under your covers and dissipate from humiliation. He follows suit, walking you out of his apartment.

"Thank you for coming."

He says in a way you're not sure you believe.

"Anytime."

As you close your door, you kick yourself. Dumbass, he's never gonna let your weird ass back in his place ever again. He closes his door. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

~

You go about your monotonous days, mopey as ever. It's like you were stuck in your very own cruel and dreary Groundhog Day. A week goes by. Ding

Hope you are doing well.

Wow, he really must feel bad for you.

Thanks

You could try to be more amiable for someone who gives you the time of day.

Would you like to come over for dinner?

Dinner, how intimate. Your thumbs fidget over the screen, keyboard awaiting your response.

Sure

You don't even attempt to dress nice, just don the same hoodie and baggy pants combo you always do.

It's a quiet dinner. Steak and potatoes. Probably the most complex thing this man can whip up. Still, it's better than the junk you've been shoveling down your gob.

"Thanks."

You say between bites.

"Natrülich."

He responds. As if this was a common occurrence between the both of you.

"Any hobbies?"

He's cutting his steak. It bleeds, practically still mooing. Thankfully, yours is cooked more thoroughly.

"Not really. You?"

You chew your steak. God, you're such a loser.

"Reading. Cycling. Bird watching."

He states, cutting his potatoes in quarters. Quite the character, this one. Whatever, it was nice to not eat alone for once. Better than eating delivered fast food in the dark like some gremlin. Dinner is finished and you didn't even have a full conversation, probably something you both preferred. He waits for you to close your door before he closes his.

Something made you feel better temporarily as you sat in his apartment. Some company was good for you, as much as you despised feeling burdensome.

It became a weekly routine for the two of you; no contact until you get an invite, eat dinner in silence, maybe a nonintrusive question, then you scurry back to your apartment. You looked forward to it, as predictable it was. One day he says something off-script while cutting his roasted potatoes in quarters,

"Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted."

You stop chewing, staring at your plate. You sympathetically force out a chuckle. He knows it's disingenuous. Kind of appreciates you entertaining him, though. You think the same. Leave. He cleans up, thinking about that splotch of blood on the sleeve of your hoodie. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

~

The coldest months of the year touch down, they're harsher then the winters your used to. You're freezing, even when your heat is turned up as high as it can go. One morning you wake up, can see your own breath. Heater fucking shit itself. You call the landlord, says he'll get it fixed asap. You trudge to work, same shit different day. Get home. Still fucking freezing, somehow even colder. Layer every blanket you have on the bed and slip under them with the warmest clothes you own. Try to get warm, doesn't work. Makes you wanna cry; it's the only thing you can think of doing at this point. God must love to see you suffer, it's the only answer to why you have such a shitty life. You just wanna jump off a bridge. Ding

You're in front of his door faster than usual, still wearing layers of clothing. Still numbingly cold. He opens the door, confused look on his face. You can feel the warmth radiating from his place.

"Heaters broken."

Your tone is even more than defeated than usual. You shuffle into his place and strip down to your hoodie and pants. He folds and places each article of clothing on the couch. Kind of feel bad for making him clean up after you. Kind of too downtrodden to care. He serves up something different. Soup?

"Something more hearty for the cold."

He states as he places a bowl infront of you. Red meat with potatoes and some other vegetables. Same thing he usually cooks but in a soup form. You appreciate it, very comforting. Avoiding eye contact as usual, you eat. Only sound is your spoons hitting the ceramic bowls.

"You could sleep here. Until the heating is fixed."

He offers, still looking at his bowl. You look up at him.

"I wouldn't want to be a bother."

You really didn't. Plus, he works so hard to make his place perfect. Wouldn't want to mess that up.

"No bother. Really.'

He keeps eating. He knows you are alone. Knows you have no one to turn to. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

You contemplate. Would you rather freeze to death? Hell no.

"Thank you."

That's as close to a yes you can say. He nods, grabs the plates and cleans his kitchen. You walk back to your place; grabbing a toothbrush and clothes to sleep in, stuffing it all in a tote. It's weird being in his place after dinner; can't describe it really, just feels different. He places some blankets and a pillow on the couch. You change into some plaid sweats and a long sleeve shirt.

"Goodnight, Fräulein."

A hint of awkwardness in his voice.

"Goodnight."

You reply, lying on the couch and trying to make yourself comfortable. Little early to be going to bed but whatever. Guess that's what people his age do? Sleep comes easier than usual.

~

You wake up, stand, and stretch. He's sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee, and reading the news from his Kindle. Watches you reach your arms above your head, the dimples on your back peeking out from under your shirt.

"Morgen, Fräulein."

He greets you. You wonder how long he's been up. Didn't wake you up walking around.

"Good morning."

Your voice raspy, sitting across from him. You're not wearing a bra: never do when you sleep. He can tell, tries not to make it obvious.

"Kaffee?"

He stands, not waiting for an answer.

"Mhm."

You reach your hands out as he places a warm cup in your hand. He always made it just how you liked it. Hm.

You have to get ready for work. He hands you a towel and starts the shower. You lock yourself in the bathroom, the steam warm and inviting. You forgot to bring your own shampoo or body wash, great. Just use whatever he has. It seems expensive, hope he doesn't mind. First time seeing a man use real shampoo and conditioner, not 3-in-1. Scrub down with his body wash. Smells like fucking heaven. Floral with a hint of...saltwater? Look at the bottle, "Un Jardin sur la Lagune," sounds about right. "By Hermès", what the fuck? This shit is practically liquid gold. Guess it's befitting for a guy that calls himself king. Finish getting ready. Before you walk out the door, he calls out from the kitchen.

"Text me when you're headed back, ja?"

You nod and assure him you will. Walking to the coffee shop, you think about him. You don't really know what to make of him. Feeling his presence in the other room made it a little easier to sleep though. And now you smell like him. It's such a subtle, pleasant scent, kind of soothing. The day goes by a little faster, customers are less agitating, aroma of coffee is replaced with his. Hm.

~

The walk back is pleasant, as cold as it is. Being in his place instead of the dark abyss you call home was...you can't put a word to it. All you know is that it felt warm. Enter his place, he left the door unlocked for you. Dinner is already on the table. He'd make such a wonderful housewife, you joke to yourself.

"Abend, Fräulein."

He greets nonchalantly.

"Evening, König."

You cringe at saying his 'name'. Swear you see the corner of his mouth twitch. Dinner is less awkward than usual.

"Anything from the landlord?"

He grabs your bowl once you're done.

"Oh, no. I should check, right?"

It slipped your mind. Maybe he's politely saying, 'get the fuck out'. You call the landlord. It rings for a while.

"Calling my guy tomorrow."

Was his response. Didn't really sound like he cared. Didn't even really sound like he was gonna do that. You sigh.

"You can withhold rent if he keeps this up, report him to the proper authorities."

He says serious, almost frustrated. You take note of that.

"I promise I'll be out of your hair soon enough."

Your tone dismal as always. This situation really made you feel so burdensome. He stopped for a moment, staring at the wall infront of the sink.

"It's no issue, really."

He wanted to say, stay. Stay until you feel less broken. Stay until you feel like you can stand on your own two feet. Stay until your wounds heal over and fade away. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

He looked over to you as you fiddled with the cuff of your hoodie. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

~

You were lounging on the couch, him on the recliner. You were scrolling mindlessly through one of the many social media apps you have. He was lost in some book that looked heavy and boring. This was pleasant. Better than the pit of despair your apartment is. You look over your phone. Never really did get a good look at him. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows from when he was doing the dishes earlier; nails pristine but with hands of a working man, large and definitely strong. Knuckles dark as if he fought a lot in a past life. Veins prominent on the back of his hand, they run up his forearm. You know they climb up his biceps. You picture it. Hm.

~

The next week passes by fast. Stopped cutting for the sole reason of being under someone else's roof. Only cried every other day instead of every other hour. Did it in the shower either before or after work. He noticed, of course, just bit his tongue.

"The landlord hasn't been picking up. Gonna try to reach out to the Tenants' Association."

You spoon hot goulash into your mouth.

"Gut."

He nods, sleeves rolled up again to not get sauce on his cuffs.

Still feeling weird about this whole thing, wondering when he'll get sick of this whole charity case situation. You always walk back to the apartment thinking this will be the time your stuff is outside of his locked door. Not like you'll be homeless or anything. Just sucked back into the ninth circle of hell that is your apartment.

"Would you like to watch a movie, Fräulein?"

He grabs the dishes and washes them.

"Sure."

You wonder if you'll have to pick again. Maybe you'll choose something less juvenile. You settle into your usual spots in the living room.

"I think you will like this one."

He stares at the TV, avoiding eye contact. He types into the search bar. '13 going on 30'. You're kind of embarrassed that he clocked you as the sappy romcom loser you are. You wonder if he watched this before. Definitely not. Did he try to find something you'd like? The thought makes you feel odd. You watch the film in silence, a small smile crosses your face at the end. Hm.

"Did you enjoy yourself?"

He always spoke so proper, guess that's just how Germans talk.

"Very much, thank you."

You try not to sound like your usual sad self. A flicker of some emotion dances across his eyes. He stands and walks to his room.

"Goodnight, Fräulein."

You settle into the couch.

"Good night, König."

~

Today was your day off, you wanted to be productive; wash your clothes, go grocery shopping, maybe help clean the apartment up.

"You are a guest. I'll take care of everything, it's my apartment."

His tone is firm, leaving no room for argument. Let's you put your dirty clothes in the washer, but that's about it. He dusts, sweeps, mops. Cleans every surface possible, down to the last detail. You're just kind of sat there, feeling useless. He waves you over once your clothes are done drying, dumping your clothes on his bed. This is your first time seeing his bedroom. Just as pristine as the rest of his place.

"I made some space for you."

He slides open a drawer. You were about to say something, but he kind of stares at you in a way that silences you. He leaves to the kitchen. You fold your clothes, putting them away as neat as you can. Once your done you turn to leave. You notice that there are no pillows on his bed.

"We can go to the store together, if you'd like."

He offers, sliding into his jacket. You nod, throwing some warmer clothes on. You're out the house, headed to the grocery store. Walking next to him made you realize how huge this man was. You wondered how you looked from his perspective. You follow him around the store like a lost puppy.

"You can grab something if you'd like."

He says as he grabs a bag of potatoes. You walk off, trying to give him some space. It must be annoying to have some sad, strange woman in your house; using your expensive soap, breathing down your neck, eating your food.

You don't know what you want. Whatever he makes is good enough. More than that. You grab some brownie mix. Maybe you'll bake him something. As soon as you know it, you're back at his place.

"Brownies, ja?"

He pointed out as he put away the food.

"Was gonna make some tonight. For you."

You tell him, watching him from the kitchen table. He pauses for a moment.

"Danke schön, Fräulein."

He finishes putting the groceries away, returning his reusable bags back into the pantry. You face each other. Both of you getting a better look at each others faces. Those sleepy eyes of his accentuated by long lashes, subtle and light scars scattered across his face, stubble that looked like it would feel like fine grit sandpaper. Hm.

He clears his throat as he walks to the living room, sitting down to read. You don't really know what to do with yourself, scrolling through your phone all the time is a little depressing. Guess you'll just start baking. Might be a little early, but fuck it. Standing in his kitchen you look around, you don't even know where he put the brownie mix. You open cabinets and drawers, shuffling around.

"Fräulein?"

He startles you, standing at the entrance of the kitchen. He can be surprisingly quiet when he wants to be.

"Oh, I just wanted to start baking..."

You weren't sure if he wanted to let you do that. Might make too much of a mess. He shrugs and maneuvers around the kitchen, reaching over you to grab a bowl. You weren't even necessarily small, but you still dwarfed him.

"Here, Fräulein."

He sets everything up on the counter.

"Thank you."

You put everything together, try not to make a mess. Baking tray in the oven. Wait. Back on the couch, scrolling through your phone. He reads his book, peeking up inconspicuously. He sees your arms for the first time. You rolled them up while baking. He tries not to react. It's more than he expected, you're littered with gashes. Catches him off guard. You blink, feeling more exposed than usual. Quickly cover up your arms. He goes back to his book. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

Dinner is quiet, you know he saw your cuts. Made you feel weird. Ashamed. You go to sleep, thinking about how you lay on the only pillow he has in this place. Hm.

~

Lying in his bed, door locked. He stares at the ceiling while he fucks his hand. Always did it when you showed any appreciation; a simple 'thank you' or a fake smile when he tells a shitty joke. Then you made him fucking brownies? Gott im himmel, that made him so hard he got dizzy. Imagines your sweet lips curling up into a smile while looking up at him before you show him how grateful you really are. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

~

You wake up the next morning, same routine as usual. Coffee, shower, work. Tenants' Association gets back to you. It took them long enough. They reached out to your landlord, chewed his ass out. Heat should be back on by tomorrow the latest. Realize what this means. You kind of don't want to go back to your place. Feel like you'll just slide back into your old ways. But you can't stay at his place forever. No matter how much he says it's ok. Walking back home, you decide not to tell him about the fixed heater for another couple of days. While making dinner, König heard the maintenance guys walk into your place. Disappointment washes over him. A few minutes after they leave your place, you walk into his.

"Schnitzel."

He says, waiting for you to take a seat. Something new? Looks delicious, take a bite. It is.

"It's really good."

You devour it, really is comforting. Tastes like home somehow. He watches you tear into the meal as if it would run away from you. He clenches his jaw, swallowing.

"You like it, Fräulein?"

His hands lay on his thighs under the table.

"Love it, thank you."

You quickly look up at him and smile.

"Natrülich, Fräulein."

He digs his fingers into his thighs; wanting to milk this as much for as long as he can while he still has the chance. He's going to miss this. He starts washing the dishes.

"Hear anything from the landlord?"

Wonders when you'll break the news to him.

"Oh...no."

You reply casually while freaking out inside, hoping he doesn't notice you're lying. He avoids looking at you, embarrassingly leaky tip tucked up into his waistband under a conveniently long sweater. He subtly grinds against the counter.

"Would you like to watch a movie?"

He always sounded so polite, so disarming. You nod and change into your pajamas, sitting on the couch. He brings over a hot chocolate. You take it, looking at his long, thick fingers and veiny hands. Fucking delicious. Hm.

"You shouldn't have, really."

You flashed a small smile at him. His eyes were soft, stared right into yours. This was the longest you two ever made eye contact for. Didn't even feel awkward doing it. You sit through another romcom, a warm feeling washes over you.

"I really appreciate everything you do for me, König. I can't thank you enough, really."

You can't imagine why he's been so kind to you, but you're grateful for it. Makes you wanna stay forever.

"You can..."

He starts, shifting in his recliner.

"...you can stay for as long as you like, you know?"

His voice a little shaky. You might actually take him up on his offer. So what if you depended on him? He seems to like it. (He fucking loves it.) He wants to help you. (He wants to fuck your brains out.) He's just a man with a heart of gold. (He's an egotistical freak who gets off on playing hero.)

"I'd like that."

You finally respond, leaning back into the couch and relaxing. A weight lifting off your shoulders. He shows off a soft smile, the corners of his eyes crease. Hm.

~

"Breaking the lease would be cheaper than continuing to pay rent, I'll help you cover that."

He says nonchalantly while handing you your coffee the next morning. You blinked. This is a lot all at once...

"Oh, I couldn't possibly-"

"Let me help you, bitte? It's really no issue at all."

His eyes were so kind, it made you feel so warm and safe. How could you turn down his help now? There was an overwhelming feeling. It's been building up since the first time he talked to you. A tightness in your chest. You felt indebted to him. More than indebted. You owed him so much. In all honesty? You owed him your life.

"I really can't thank you enough...'

His jaw clenched as cleared his throat and leaned back into the chair.

"Letting me help you is all the thanks I need, Fräulein."

Something in his eyes flicker though, it was unsettling. You shrug it off. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

~

By the next week, you sold most of your furniture and moved the rest of your things into his flat. He picked where everything went though, and why not? It was his apartment and he had a place for everything. If he didn't, he'd make space. You brought up the idea of splitting rent or paying utilities. He waved it off,

"Absolutely not, save your money."

Another week of sleeping on the couch has started messing with your back, so naturally he makes you sleep in his bed while he's on the couch. But a man of his stature and age? After the fourth day on the couch, his whole body was shot. Constantly stretching, groaning when bending over, taking paracetamol as often as he can.

"You can sleep in the bed, I'll take the couch."

You offer while he handed you your tea one night.

"Nonsense. That is unthinkable."

He rolls his head side to side, stretching his neck. You bite your lip. He sips his tea.

"We can...we can share the bed."

You look up at him through your lashes, coy. He nearly chokes,

"Out of the question."

His ears burn.

"Fine, let me... Can I give you a massage?"

~

He's face down on the bed while you're on your knees next to him, hands kneading broad toned shoulders. Hm. You tug at his shirt.

"Take this off, can't give you a proper massage like this."

You feel kinda perverted, wanting an excuse to see what's been under those sweaters and button ups. He puts up a half-hearted fight before taking off his sweater and undershirt. Scars litter his body, some silver and flat, others dark and raised.

"Freelancer, huh?"

You run your fingers across the biggest one, it runs diagonally from his right shoulder down to the left side of his waist.

"Jein..."

He replies uncomfortably, voice barely above a whisper.

"Turn off the lights, Fräulein?"

Less of a request than it was him begging. You nod, complying. The moonlight illuminates the room in a blueish hue. You massage him, his skin covered with bumps and divots that feel like braille under your fingers. Hands run from up his back, down his arms, and back up to his neck. He turns over, eyes shining up at you. Soft touches on his chest and face, day old stubble across his jaw. You feel your heart beating out of your chest. Hm.

One soft, hesitant kiss that turns into two, then three. Then, it deepens, getting more desperate. Big, rough hands placed on the back of your neck and waist. Soft breaths and moans fill the room. Sit right on him, hips grinding against his. Your cheap denim rubbing his expensive linen silk. Half lidded stares and panting while you tear your shirt off. That makes him buck his hips up just so he can watch your chest jump. Your bottoms come off first, then his. You take a sharp breath in while you watch his dick spring up, slapping his stomach.

He just smiles down at you, admiring how your body looks. You freeze, not sure how to move forward with...that. He takes charge, sitting up and manhandling you, pinning you down and licking your inner thighs. He wraps his arms around your legs, hands locked in front of your hips. It starts with soft, almost ticklish licks. Then he buries himself into you. It's wet, a little colder than your radiating heat, dizzying, and delicious. Hm.

He pulls away, chest rising and falling fast. Lines himself up with you, looks into your eyes, searching for consent before moving forward. You nod eagerly. The tip alone makes you gasp, he shoots his eyes back up to your face.

"Keep going, I'm fine."

You assured him. He pushes himself in as far as you can take it, eyebrows furrowed. He made a face that you would laugh at if you weren't trying so hard to adjust to him. You gripped the sheets. He started moving slowly, groans escaping him.

"You are wonderful...so tight and soft...all of this, just for me, ja?"

"Uh-huh..."

Your mouth ajar, eyes rolled back. You'd agree to anything this man said right now if he kept fucking you like this. His hips moved faster. And faster. And harder. And harder. Your toes curl and back arches, close to the edge. His eyes are wide.

"Say thank you for every time I make you come, ja?"

It was less a request and more of a demand, the softness in his voice gone. You just agreed breathlessly, you'd say thank you happily and mean it. You haven't came in so long, the feeling of pleasure was almost foreign to you. He dug right up into your sweet spot, long forearms on either side of your head. He fucked that orgasm right out of you.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou-"

"Mhm."

Foolish smile across his face, reveling in the moment. He helped people. That's what he did. Made him feel like God's gift to Earth.

You spasmed around him. He kept going. And going. And going. He makes you thank him until your voice is hoarse, until sweat is dripping off the both of you, until you're sure the both of you are sore. Before you know it he pulls out of you and kneels right next to your head,

"Open, mein Engel."

He pants while pulling your head to his lap. You wrap your pretty mouth just barely around his tip and gag when he pushes down. His hands shake and grip the back of your neck hard while he spills a heavy, hot load down your throat. He moans when you look up at him, pull his dick out your mouth with a satisfying pop, and smile. He admires the way you flop on your back, drool down your chin, hair a mess, legs splayed and shaking. Shame, such a pretty young thing in shambles.

[pbandjz]

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 • 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: pdh!gene x fem!reader

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬: angst/comfort, fluff, romantic/suggestive tension.

𝐜𝐰: slightly suggestive (its GENE.) but majority sfw. 16+ !

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 2nd year at phoenix drop high, youre a sophmore. You run into ivy causing a mess and getting on her SUPER bad side. keeping ivys bullying to yourself from your friends, you get into a situation with the shadow knights.

DISCLAIMER

ive never writen a fanfic before so if this is cringe or too many unnecessary details and horrible spelling mistakes i am so sorry...pls give me a chance..(pls give me feedback on how to improve my writing. pls be nice.)

CHAPTER 2.

As you park in front of the girl's house, you pull out your phone to send her a text.

_______________

Aphmau ^^

(xxx)-xxx-xxxx

You: alright !! :) I'll pick you up in the morning! Goodnight!!1

Aphmau: Okeyyy! :3 Goodnightt!

Read 10:23

-monday-

You: hey i'm hereee

Delivered 7:20

_______________

You stare at your phone as you wait for her to respond. Dead panning at the front entrance after 5 minutes. Looking back at your phone and sighing, you unbuckle yourself and open the door to your car. You walk up to the front door of Aphmau's house and knock on the door. To your surprise you can hear shuffling from the inside and a yell from what sounds like an older woman.

The older woman swings the door open and smiles brightly at you. You’ve met her before but briefly. “Hi mija! Are you here to take my baby to school?” She holds her hand together waiting for your response. “Yes ma’am! I'm here for Aphmau” you finally respond with a nervous smile. She whips around and walks towards the stairs before turning to you for a moment. “Come in mija!” she says while turning back to the stairs and yelling up the stairs. You close the door behind you and wait for the black haired girl at the entrance. You wait about two minutes before watching the short girl wave at you from up the stairs. You smile at her and wave back as she rushes down the stairs. “Sorry for the wait” she exclaims. She runs up to you and throws her bag onto the floor and gets on the floor to shove her feet into her shoes. Picking up her stuff, you look at her holding the door open for them to leave. She yells her goodbyes to her mom and shuts the door and locks it. She turns to you and smiles tiredly. You smile back and head towards your car. You get into the car together and start playing music.

_______

at school

You look down at your phone as you finish climbing the stairs up to the front entrance of the school. You both give each other a side eye remembering that they have the doors locked for the first day. You and Aphmau both agree after staring at the doors that you would find the others before the bell rings. Looking around you make eye contact with kawaii chans sparkling orange eyes. You giggle to yourself about how happy she is to see you and Aphmau. You guys make your way over to Kawaii chan who is standing with Kaitlyn and nicole.

You don't seem to notice someone out of the corner of your eye while checking your phone for the time causing you to crash into one another. You fall to your knees in slight pain, looking up covering your sore nose to see Aphmau's terrified face and then slowly looking to see who you had the unfortunate fate of bumping into on the first day. You lay your eyes on an edgy looking teenage boy. His ashy blue eyes slightly covered by messy black hair stare down at you with disdain. You look back at aphmau and she looks down back to you while reaching her hand out for you. Picking yourself up with the help of your friend you look back to where the black haired buy was a moment ago. He’s gone. You look around and see he’s only a few steps away so you watch him walk away into the corner join a few other edgy looking kids. You roll your eyes and look back at aphmau who is nervously smiling at you. “Who was that..?” you finally break the silence. She’s startled by your question. Although, now you were good friends, last year you weren't too close. So you don't have any knowledge of the boy and Aphmau's history. “...is he an ex?” You ask, making aphmau's jaw drop and deadpan to the group of friends that were waiting for you. You turn to look at them and to your surprise they looked shocked. Kaitlyn looks almost pissed and disgusted and Nicole's mouth is slightly open in awe. Kawaii chan on the other hand…you can tell something stirring up in her little meif'wa mind. She has the fattest smile on her face that makes you cringe and hide behind Aphmau as you collectively walked towards the group.

As you near them, passing the fountain, you can feel the stares of other students. They're not necessarily BAD stares but it was awkward. “Are you ok?” Kaitlyn asks, turning her head and staring menacingly at the boy that didn't seem too apologetic for knocking you down. You glance over to the group and the heat rushes to your face when you catch him staring and you. He smirks before looking away and continuing his conversation. “y-yeah..I’m fine,,why?”. You face the 4 friends in confusion. The four of them look at you with concern or nervous smiles. Nicole leans in and cups your ear and whispers, “Well, last year Aphmau had a few problems with that group. They’re called the Shadow Knights. They’re just a group of delinquents. They just skip and tag the place up while no one watches. They haven’t done anything too bad after what happened last year with them getting caught skipping in the back of the school. But they still seem to like picking on some students. It's best not to associate with them in any way for the better of your safety.” she pulls away and smiles. You look to aphmau with a worried face. “So his name is Gene?” You ask. “Yeah. The one you bumped into is gene, the white haired girl is sasha and the brunette is Zenix.” Kaitlyn says with a hint of hate in her voice.

As you turn to speak to Aphmau the bell rings and all the students rush into the building after the doors open. Youre about to walk into the crowd when KC grabs you and pulls you back into the group. “Kawaiichan thinks its best to be the last to get into the building so we dont get lost..” You shrug and nod in agreement. To your suprise, when most of the students made it into the building you see Gene and his friends start to sneak away. Kaitlyn being petty and nosy, calls over Teony. She’s been holding the door the entire time, you couldnt see her behind the swarm of students. Nonetheless she makes her way to you and the other girls before glancing at the group of delinquents trying to make their escape. “Sorry ladies..” she says sweetly before storming towards the students and scolding them and dragging them into the building. You start making your way into the building aswell. Catching another glimpse of an even more angered trio, you cant help but let out a small giggle while passing them, earning a glare from Zenix.

_____

☆

In class

You dont have any classes with any of your friends for your first class so you sit at the seat near the back window looking out into a hall. Your eyes travel across the room before stopping at the now opening classroom door. You watch the black haired boy grumbling to himself as Teony drags him into the class. She waves at you before explaining to the teacher that he had gotten lost. Obviously a lie. Teony was a saint when it came to saving even the bad kids. She leaves after waving you goodbye. TThe teacher looks at the boy with a soft smile. She looks around the room and lay her eyes into you. Smiling, she gestures over to you with her hand. “There. You will sit there for the semester. Maybe sitting next to a top student will help you get your act together." she says gently with a bit of disdain in her voice. He looks into the direction the teacher was pointing with zero emotion on his face. Until he lays eyes on you. He furrows his eyebrows and groans while shuffing his way towards the seat next to you. Placing the bag onto his desk before standing there next to his new seat glaring. You can smell the faint smell of cigarettes poorly covered by cologne, making your nose scrunch in disgust. You give him a weak and fake smile as he sits. Making him smile just as, if not more obviously fake, in response.

_____

☆

After a nerve-wracking class, you stop near the door of the class to look at your schedule. You can smell the cigarettes again. You felt someone shove past you in the alomst empty hall. You look up in confusion and see Gene walking away. You stare at the back of his head. “Asshole.” You mutter under your breath, just loud enough for him to hear over the sound of werewolves playing around in the next hall. He stop in his tracks, turns his head to look back at you with a shit eating grin. You return the smile back as if you said nothing. Walking past him before he can get a word in. You can feel his gaze burn into the back of your skull, making your face flush red in fear of what you just got yourself into.

[fategoflatass]

My Winter 2024 Watchlist & Opinions

The feared time has come. After avoiding this post like the plague, I finally put myself to write my pretty unnecessary thoughts on this season that's departing next week or so.

Admittely, it wasn't that big of a deal, but that might be because the bigger titles will come out the following season? (Should I also make a post about that?)

Anyway, let's get started!

Boku no Kokoro no Yabai Yatsu 2nd Season

Comedy, Romance, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆☆

CW: cringey teenagers

Here, we one again get to follow our favorite middle school duo—the edgy boy and the gluttony in human form—as they grow up and find out just how complicated being a teen can be. Awkwardness, idiots and cutsie romance ensured!

This series is just so damn adorable, man! And awkward, holy fuck it can be awkward. But being a teenager is, in big part, going through the cringiest phases possible to cleanse the karma of a lifetime, so is that a bad quality or an amazing depiction of real life?

Anyway, my guys are back and I can't explain just how happy I am about it! I'm usually not that fond of school romances since, well, they tend to be too immature for what I'm currently looking for. This was made especially obvious since I began watching more and more series centered around adult characters.

But this series is quite different—they're immature, yes, but it's not as annoying as they tend to be. You know why? Because they found out about this thing called communication. Yes, they're not the greatests at it, but at least they're trying!

I've been thinking on checking the manga out, although I haven't decided yet. If anyone here has read it/is up to date, should I get into it or wait until next season comes out?

BUCCHIGIRI?!

Action, Supernatural // ☆☆

CW: big ammounts of cringe

Arajin Tomoshibi's reunion with his old pal Matakara Asamine takes an unexpected turn when they stumble into a brawl with the toughest guys in town. And just when you thought things couldn't get weirder, a colossal genie decides to drop in. Brace yourself for the ultimate showdown. It's the clash of the cool and the magical!

(Yes, I stole the summary from AniList. Couldn't bother to write something down for this one).

This series comes from Utsumi Hiroko—the same woman who worked on Free! and Banana Fish, the mind behind SK8; one of my biggest comfort shows. And honestly, it shows!

Because BUCCHIGIRI?! is an amalgamation of all her previous ones.

You have the childhood friend pair composed of the Gentle Giant™ (who's quite literally Makoto 2.0, personality and appareance wise) and a dude who has only one goal in life—for Haru, it was to swim free style. For Arajin, is to get laid. And no, I'm not kidding.

Then you get the delinquents (I refuse to call them gangs. They remind me too much to the Tokyo Revengers guys, and I despise that show) and their corresponding leaders—the fruity freak (who I love, ngl) with the obssesive, brocon little sister (who I despise, ngl), the big ass bitch whose age's unknown but seems too old to be hanging around teens, and later on we get a guy who reminds me a lot of Jamil from Twisted Wonderland only that he's utterly pathetic, a professional crybaby and, overall, unbearable—entirely different from my totally cool and more than respectable guy.

There's not much to say about the rest of the cast since they're forgettable to a fault, having little to not charisma. Expect for the skirt guy, he's neat.

When it comes to the supernatural side of things, ugh. The dude who follows Arajin around is exasperating and so cringey I tend to skip fowards when I know a joke—the joke, the only thing he knows besides fighting—is coming.

Speaking of which, the fight scenes are cool, MAPPA doing their best as always. I just wish they would beat up Arajin more often (and that he didn't have to scream his primal urges every time he's going for a punch).

And, for fuck's sake, don't get me started on Arajin. He's the worst protagonist this woman has ever come out with—zero charisma, a total asshole, a terrible friend, and a guy who'd make you want to die if he ever got a crush on you.

I'll cut it here since it's getting too long and I don't wanna get into spoiler territory (in case anyone cares about that), but yeah. I don't recommend, at all. Go watch her other shows instead.

Dungeon Meshi

Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy // ☆☆☆¾

CW: blood, death, violence

While exploring a dungeon, the adventurer Laios and his party are confronted by and lose against a red dragon—they're left without money, provisions and Laios' sister. But not everything is lost, since they can still save her while the creature digests its food. The problem is, they can't fight with an empty stomach!

The best show of the season, hands down. Not like it had much competition to begin with, but anyway.

When I first heard about the show's plot, I admit it, it didn't call me at all. But certain someone (*cough* @arataka-reigen *cough*) convinced me to give it a try. And here we are!

Honestly, I haven't had a laugh like this with an anime in so long! Not only because of the jokes, but the characters are perfectly designed for the viewer to laugh with and, most importantly, at them. I actually have the theory that they're the ones responsible for the BUCCHIGIRI?! cast's lack of charisma. I mean, they had to steal it from somewhere—is too much!

From what I know, more characters are yet to appear (I saw a catgirl and, as a cat lover, I just gotta see the catgirl) and the story gets darker with time (in case episode eleven wasn't enough hint for you).

I can't wait to see what this story has to offer next!

Gekai Elise

Comedy, Fantasy, Romance // ☆☆½

CW: tracheotomies without gloves

In seek of redemption, Takamoto Aoi becomes a doctor to help those who she would've either mistreated or ignored in her past life. Sadly, she gets involved in a plane crash and dies—only to wake up as her past self, ten years before her demise! She'll now look to become a surgeon once again, in the hopes of changing her fate.

If I had to describe it with one word, it would be meh.

The characters, the plot, the romance—it's all pretty average. A wet piece of cardboard is way more interesting than the entire cast and the story put together. The love story is whatever, not engaging enough to get me interested on their scenes.

What I would've liked is if they went on and changed the affections names for something more fantasy-ish or that has to do with the world in which they live in—I highly doubt these people knew about the existence of Dr. James Parkinson, so why would they name a disease after him? That sorta thing, you know?

But anyways, basic ass story with basic ass characters, and I'm a fool for having given it a chance.

And if I may ask, where the hell is the lamp?!

HIGH CARD Season 2

Action, Fantasy // ☆☆½

CW: cultural appropiation (?), blood, some violence

The High Card team keeps on fighting to mantain peace in the city, all meanwhile some of its members are still dealing with past consequences. But when new trouble surrounding the cards surges, they have to get to work to save the day once again!

Look, if the summary ain't shit is mainly because this show has me so uninspired. The only reason why I didn't steal it from AniList is because it doesn't have one.

In case anyone wonders why I'm still watching this show, same. I guess season one wasn't that bad for me to go and drop it, so I decided to give it a second chance. Do I regret it? Mmh, kinda.

To be honest, it's not entirely bad. I mean, it's certainly worst than its predecessor, but it had an interesting section that had me paying a little more attention than usual for like, two episodes or so. And then it lost me again.

The section I'm talking about is around episodes five to seven, where—and spoiling as little as I can—things get rather dramatic. It felt like a cry for help disguised as character growth that did nothing, absolutely nothing, to the characters themselves. They could've skipped those episodes and it would've been business as usual.

In the first two episodes we get introduced to his superhero-like guy who loves spitting random words in Spanish and, no, he's not even Hispanic. Then, he proceeded to not appear for the rest of the season. At least for now, we're currently in episode ten. But even if he were to appear once again, I don't think there's enough time to develop him or create a plot surrounding his cringey ass.

Also, and this might be petty as hell: they never explain why the cards look like the poker ones? I mean, they shared the lore behind them, yet that didn't explain this? How did they come out with the cards' and combination's names if they're supposed to not be poker related?

Hime-sama, "Goumon" no Jikan desu

Comedy, Fantasy // ☆☆¼

CW: none

Amidst the war between their kingdoms, the Princess is captured and imprisoned by the demons alongside her mythical sword and companion, Excalibur. It all seems grim for these two but, when the time comes around, the demons' torture methods seem a bit... gourmet?

I came into this show solely because of the trailer. What can I say? It looked nice. And to be honest, the entires series does.

These type of shows don't tend to be my cup of tea, but I thought it could turn out to be something similar to Maou-jou de Oyasumi—something that doesn't catch me at first, yet its second half leaves me wanting some more of those charismatic characters (Twilight my beloved).

The problem here is that God, it's repetitive. This series has one sole formula and will repeat it till the end of times, with barely some exceptions.

As LunarEquinox would put it, "it not her being tortured, it's you being tortured by repitition".

Kyuujitsu no Warumono-san

Comedy, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆½

CW: none

Planet Earth and its habitants are in danger; they've become the main target of an evil intergalactic organization who seeks to rule the world! The Rangers do everything in their power to defend the citizens from the General—but today's his day off.

Another fluffly, non plot-centric series. But this one I'm quite fond of.

I guess it's because I really like the «gap moe» concept? The difference between the protagonist's intimidating and powerful look at work and his casual, awkward and panda-obsessed self once he's home it's pretty adorable. It's like he goes from being a lion to one of those long ass domestic cats who'd let you hold him if close enough—only that I think he's supposed to be a lizard(?) of some sorts.

But it's not only him; you also get to see his coworkers with are all very formidable, and even the Rangers themselves. Red having no sense of orientation whatsoever is too relatable, I hate it here.

Not much to say, really. It's just a show about a long ass dude on a trenchcoat whose (most probably, undiagnosed) autism gets him to buy anything panda-related. If he were to become the ruler of the new world, I wouldn't oppose to it.

Loop 7-kaime no Akuyaku Reijou wa, Moto Tekikoku de Jiyuu Kimamana Hanayome Seikatsu wo Mankitsu Suru

Fantasy, Romance // ☆☆☆¾

CW: violence, mentions of war

Rishe Irmgard Weitzner, a duke's daughter, has lived many lives—and it's not a saying. For the past few decades, she's been trapped in a timeloop where her engagement gets called off at age fifteen and, from then fowards, she's decided to go down different paths. A merchant, a doctor, a maid—whatever called her attention. Is in her seventh time she become subject of the affections of infamous crown prince, Arnold Hein—the very same man who'd killed her in one of her past lives as a knight. When he asks Rishe to become his wife, she decides to utilize her every skill to avoid the upcoming war.

This one's different from the others, in the sense that I wasn't there when the first episode premiered. I guess it hadn't caught my attention (and the way they colored the hairs looked so bad to me at times, and still does). But again, certain someone began posting about it and I couldn't help myself.

I found this series to be a tad more interesting than the average female public-centric fantasy series. They actually cared to build an appealing plot with its politics and all, while also giving us an attractive main couple whose chemistry is quite nice. I like it when the characters banter, they go back and forth a little bit, but still show feelings for each other—is entertaining, isn't it?

While it's not my favorite series from this season, I do find it highly recommendable—independently of whether you're already into this type of shows or you'd like to give them a try.

Majo to Yajuu

Action, Adventure, Drama, Fantasy // ☆☆

CW: violence, blood

A guy carrying a coffin alongside his companion appear in a town, searching for the witch who cursed her and fighting some others in the meantime.

I love dark fantasy stories, so when I stumbled upon this show it grabbed my attention almost immediately. The whole concept of wiches, curses and different types of magic has always been a concept I quite enjoy. When it's well done, that is.

What Majo to Yajuu brings to the table is an uninspired series that unapologetically grabs concepts from other stories similar in concept, and doesn't even try to do anything new with them. The magic system is has is so average and uninteresting, and the same happens with the different conflicts that surround the main plot.

And even when it is supposed to have a more mature tone, there are times where they spoon feed you basic information as if you were too stupid to comprehend the intricacies of something you've seen multiple times—not even in other places, but in the same show, even the same episode.

The characters are heavily boring, the main duo being the most salvable of all. They do have some chemistry, but it's just not enough.

Anyways, just another letdown.

Metallic Rouge

Action, Mystery, Sci-Fi // ☆½

CW: violence

In a future where humankind coexists with androids called Neans, a group of them known as the Immortal Nine rises to cause havoc in society. Rouge, a Nean, alongside investigator Naomi are tasked with going all the way to Mars to stop them.

Also known as Bones' 25th Anniversary project, Metallic Rouge arrived to put many interesting question on the table—question that have been talked about multiple times in movies and series revolving androids and robots, yet is always cool to see what different authors have to say about the matter.

Sadly, the way they decide to manage the story is quite futile when it comes to enjoyment. That is, they decided to take the "show, don't tell" narrative route—something we've seen in series like Tengoku Daimakyou, and damn if it worked there. The thing is that this narration style is rather complicated, and can't be saved if done wrong.

Well, guess what happened?

Whether it's the scripwriters' fault or not, I've no idea. The only thing I know for sure is that they fucked up. The give you little to no information, which doesn't help the viewer to try solving the mystery by themselves nor succeeds at keeping them engaged. The only thing attractive enough are the fight scenes, but they become more are more scarse as the episodes go on. Is then when the staff realizes they messed things up, and as a result you get episode nine—a huge ass info dump, with twists that no one would've been able to guess since they hadn't given us enough hints to even get a hunch of what could be going on.

An absolute mess and a masterful class on how not to do things.

Ninja Kamui

Action, Adventure, Drama, Sci-Fi // ☆☆☆¾

CW: death, fire, blood, violence

Higan is a retired ninja who lives in hiding with his family in rural America. One night, assassins from his former organization end up slaughtering both his wife and son due to him breaking their ancient code. Now seeking for revenge, Higan goes back to his old ways in the means to make them pay.

This one is such a wild ride! From the same director who worked on Jujutsu Kaisen's first season, we get an action-packed revenge series.

Yes, it might not be the most original or complex plot of all times, yet that's not its main focus. What it is its main focus are the fight scenes which are absolutely amazing, so fluid and entertaining. You won't be able to take your eyes from the screen!

Even then, the characters are compelling enough for you to either root for them or hope for the hero to end their lives once and for all.

This series is an absolute banger and no one should sleep on it!

Ore dake Level Up na Ken

Action, Adventure, Fantasy // ☆☆½

CW: death, violence, blood, edgelords

After being slaughtered by monsters in a dungeon that was far from matching his rank, Jinwoo, or "the weakest Hunter of all" as called by many others, wakes up only to find out he now that the "System" by his side. This program that only he can see will help him do the impossible—level up.

So here we are, huh.

The biggest anime this season, and it's a fucking power fantasy with extra steps. I swear to God...

Jinwoo is a boring ass piece of wet cardboard, which is meant for the viewer to find it easier to self-insert as him. Those around him are either beings with no personality at all, default mean guys, or the love interest that just has to be there to tell us just how cool and attractive the protagonist has become—not like we needed her for that, since everyone is a simp for that guy for some hell of a reason—and to be saved because she'd be dead without him.

The only thing worth your time would be the action scenes, but since they depend so much on the viewer's hype, and that mainly comes from those who root for the protagonist, it just doesn't work on me.

This shit's boring, man.

Yubisaki to Renren

Romance, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆½

CW: ableism

Yuki is just your average college student who struggles with classes as one does. One day, she gets helped in the train by an upperclassman named Itsuomi. That's when he finds out that she's actually deaf.

One of the most hyped up series from this season, and for good reasons. Not only is a shoujo—sadly, this series don't tend to get anime adaptations as often as their counterparts—, but is a rather well known one.

To the surprise of no one, this is one fluffy series! The characters are all charismatic and sweet, some more than others, and their personalities and struggles feel very human.

The romance is adorable, although I have it hard to not see Itsuomi as someone who's trying to complete a dating speedrun—might be my demi ass, but they've known each other for like, what, two to three months? And they're already dating?

Yuki's deafness is touched upon with such respect, except for when Oushi opens his fucking mouth. I don't know if it's him or the author themself who sugarcoats his ableism as if it came from sheer worry for her future, but saying deaf people should stay at home is in no way a cool thing to say or think. I doubt he'll stay like this forever, but warning you just in case it results uncomfortable for someone.

To end on a more positive note, I love the fact that they center so much around the character's lip movements! It just feels right for the themes that the series touches upon.

Yuuki Bakuhatsu Bang Bravern

Action, Comedy, Mecha // ☆☆☆½

CW: violence, war, torture (it's just one scene)

In a world where the military utilizes mechas as weapons, Oahu island, where both the Japanese and American troops are located at the moment, gets attacked by an unknown, intergalatic enemy. They'll now have to join forces to defend the planet.

I think it was Mother's Basement's video that convinced me to give this show a chance and, honestly? I don't quite regret it. After all, I like parodies and mechas, so why not combine both?

Given, I haven't watched every mecha anime there is out there—and with that, I mean that I've yet to watch Gundam which I think was a major inspiration for this one series. But even if you haven't watched it either, that doesn't mean you won't get to enjoy it.

It does make references to the genre's different tropes, yeah, but it serves as a standalone. The comedy works even if it's your first mecha series since some scenes are just so absurd.

The characters are cool, each and every one of them having enough charisma for you to be able to remember them through the entire season. They all have enough chemistry with each other to make their bonds belieable.

With time, the series starts leaving the comedy aspect aside and gets more centered around its actual plot—although the laughs never truly leave. And it actually works, which I admit surprised me a bit.

A series curious enough I think you should give it a chance.

[yellow-computer-mouse]

i see sooo many qibli and winter interactions, and i love them, but... what about turtle?

he's friends with them, too. for humor, he can be the voice of reason. he's also just. a silly lil guy. a goofy fella.

like they should go out and do some dumb shit like parkour (with no knowledge of how, parkour is cool as fuck) and get themselves hurt bc they're stupid teenagers with copious amounts of daddy issues

THIS WAS A TRAP I HAVE LED YOU INTO MY LAIR MWAHAHAA

honestly tho i think we need to see the jade winglet (aside from peril and umber bc they're much older than the others, and even then...) acting their age more

they're like. 14. 14 years olds do some dumb shit man (speaking from experience). let them be kids!!!!! esp winter

everyone treats winter (and the others but i'm using him as an example) like he's a full-grown adult. pardon me that boy is 14 years old. he should be making edgy ocs not doing taxes. he should be meeting up with his friends at a park and then shoving each other into a pond or smthn!!!

my god these are children. they're kids.

AND BRINGING UMBER BACK INTO THIS!!!! mudwings have such a close family structure!!! tell me he wouldn't give them the childhood they need. LOOK. give him fun older cousin privledges. he swears up and down he'll teach them a lesson when he catches them lighting shit on fire bc it looks cool and then he's like "ok so there's this big empty spot with nobody around ever-"

idk i love them with all my heart and soul and goddamnit i think they should make a cringe youtube channel and some shitty vlogs and convince themselves they're famous (they are not and they'll abandon the channel in a year but it will be the most fun ever)

[starlitangels]

Hey, Star! I had a random thought today.

I feel that at least one of the wolf bois had an emo phase in middle school XD It was living rent-free in my brain, and I wanted to hear your thoughts on it!

-Your Friendly Neighborhood Anon Superfan

Why stop at middle school? Definitely high school too

Did you mean: Asher

Milo takes offense to the idea of him having an Emo phase as a teenager. “Emo” implies being dressed down (oversized black hoodies, casual black shoes like Vans, T-shirts). Milo clearly had a goth phase thank you very much (dressed waaay up—knee high platform boots, jewelry, definitely wore a black ascot to a school dance, was seen wearing a gentleman’s corset in class more than once). Y’all seen men’s corsets? Like the suit vest lookin’ ones? They’re hot. The man doesn’t tolerate fashion slackin’ and didn’t as a teenager either. Milo pierced his ears during his goth phase but took them out for security jobs when he got older and got too lazy to put most of them back in and they healed over

Asher clearly had an Emo phase and looks back at it with the biggest cringe just because he thought he was probably trying too hard. Baaabe laughs because he tried so hard to be edgy but he was still the Energizer Bunny in personality “Ash the point of being Emo is you’re not supposed to smile in all the family pictures right?”

He was also really bad at the eyeliner back then but still wears some occasionally and is much better at it now

Darlin’s still in an Emo phase

David never had an Emo phase because he just wears mostly black all the time but never looked Emo because his style (normal jeans that just happened to be black, leather jacket, combat boots, Henley shirt, etc) doesn’t fit any of the aesthetics. Instead he was the big, tall, scowling senior that none of the freshman would dare even look near because he was so intimidating

[brandtner]

I'm kinda curious,do you have any headcanons about kosovo's personality? ( and any headcanons about his relations with other balkan countries?)

KOSOVO:

2008 he moves out of the house shared with his brother in Belgrade, sacrifices comfort and prestige for own respect and independence: lives in a 10m² interesting flat in Pristina with high-end communist interior.

The type of guy who chronically doesn't care for anything, we have a word for it in russian - "похуист".

He seems twisted, evil, but once you get to know him you realise he is simply a loser idiot.

Ironically very co-dependent, cannot function on his own. (I take this from the fact that USA rules over him, it is basically a colony, Kosovo will never be fully independent as in: free from any foreign influences)

Since the flat is... peculiar, he spends most of his time at Bondsteel, but travels to other places more lately, because his big brother tends to call there too often. He can't run away from him, though. Ever. (everyone has that one aunt/uncle...)

About the edginess of Kosovo that is generally agreed on: I think it is not based on anything. The "albanian organ dealer" trope is a bit old and used up, in my opinion. Basing an entire character on just that is lame. Kosovars are not albanian mafia which makes up a really important part in Germany, Italy etc. I sincerely doubt Kosovo could run anything on his own, and crime is a very hard business. He is very disorganised, hence he doesn't have organised crime. Only mess-crime.

"Edgy - something or someone trying too hard to be cool, almost to a point where it's cringe worthy.". Yeah now that I read the definition I agree, that sentence sums up Kosovo's history perfectly.

Pushes the family away, but a simple "no" to his big brother never works. His nerves can't take it anymore.

Fights back to his brothers "nazi" and pathological love in a teenager way: window breaking, graffiti, car trashing, pranks, writing angry songs, cyber bullying, smoking cigarettes, drinking. Arson.

Never spends more than 48 hours in jail. His big brother always gets him out of there and he never thanks him.

The attention he gets from both his superiors (NATO and Serbia) actually compliments him and he feels special.

Since he is 18, he tried to get a drivers license but never passed the practical exam. He's driven a car since he was 9 years old, he could pass it easily, but he always comes to the exam intoxicated (Ozzy Osbourne syndrome). Gave up after the 5th time and now drives his lawnmover to the parties.

The parties he visits look like this: four cars in a parking lot, people sitting in the trunks, drinking cheapest beer/anything containing % and it's always only guys. Someone blasts chalga from the car speakers. He has gotten 29 tickets for public drinking, and Vuk pays for every single one of them.

Cuts goat throats with Enis, then films the blood flowing from the neck slowly. (it's a muslim thing) Shares the videos to his american friends and they hate it.

Vuk insisted for him to attend a prestigious officer high school. Needless to say he traumatised the entire school, failed every grade, inflicted damage to property and to people and only graduated because his brother is a powerful man. 4 of his teachers quit teaching. He attended with Ilija in the same school. Ilija still attends it since he is 2 years younger. Everyone hates both of them.

Got his hot-headedness after Vuk. He is antisocial and paranoid after Albania. Also isolated a bit for that reason, but not as much as Albania itself. His resentment and how he exhibits it is a product of both of these nations.

KOSOVO RELATIONS:

Serbia - die USA - God bless (even though he is fully used by them no better than Serbia, just a marionette. He couldn't even keep his original flag) Albania - God bless Bosnia - Does not give a fuck about Croatia - Does not give a fuck about. NATO collegues Etc He is a loner with issues. Just like Albania. Albania doesn't even like having him around because of his many, many problems. Hence he doesn't have many relations. Blindly submits to anyone in NATO.

[scribbleshrimp]

hey i just wanted to thank you for escam. i know youre like done with uploading it but you were one of the only things keeping me on there for a while. which i guess im also thanking you for stopping

Glad you liked it! It makes me really really happy that it had a positive impact on a few people. I kinda cringe looking back at it, it was full of spelling mistakes and inconsistencies and really odd narrative choices (holyyy shit the fig tree motif that was supposed to be a core thing was poorly brought up and feels so out of place reading back) but it was my first attempt of actually writing character dialogue and an overarching story. TikTok is EVILL I can’t believe how shitty I felt about myself due to a few comments saying it was mediocre like yeah duh it was my first attempt writing something that wasn’t an essay for school! Of course it wasn’t perfect!!! Why is it a crime to not have professional level work for a hobby. That app is super cruel to beginners, the “art lore” stuff there that’s just bullying kids for being bad at anatomy is super malicious. But despite that scrambling to post videos during lunch in the middle of a noisy cafeteria while also prepping for a math test is memories I cherish lol. It’s kind of annoying that I think the thing I’ll be most remembered for are my characters that I developed as an edgy teenager since I’m not really planning on sharing more of my stories publicly but it makes me super thrilled that people found value in it. Okay okay sorry I’m rambling I just get excited when people willingly read my work. It makes me feel like a 5th grader discussing my warrior cat ocs during recess again. I’m glad you deleted TikTok that place rots the mind and soul.

[darkandstormydolls]

okay so today I am compiling a list that I have had in the back of my mind for a while and want to get written down: books with well-written goth characters

I am putting it on the internet in the hopes that there are some other people who have spent a while being frustrated with stereotypical rebellious and depressed teenagers in books who will enjoy some decent goth characters

This list is inspired by the fact that I was looking for more books with goth characters and I kept getting recommended by the internet to “The Adventures of Fanboy and Goth Girl”. And I read about half of “Goth Girl Rising” (the sequel. I did not realize it was the sequel until I was pretty far into it) before I had to put it down because I was so frustrated with it. The main character is every negative stereotype played up to an absurd degree, to the point that it’s painful to read, and the same thing goes for all the other goth characters. So, here’s a list of actually good goth characters!

Side note: I know there are lots and lots of books that fit into the gothic genre or are considered “goth” books. And those are good, and I enjoy them. However, this list is reserved for books set in the modern day that have characters who explicitly call themselves “goth” and fit the definition of the subculture.

Without further ado:

1. Goth Girl, Queen of the Universe by Lindsey S. Zrull

I will shout the praises of this book from the rooftops as long as I live. It’s absolutely wonderful, and and admittedly I am a bit biased because I have a lot in common with the main character, but it really is a good book. One of the themes in it is basically “embrace the cringe if it’s something that makes you happy”, which I love, and it also handles mental illness really really well in my opinion. The main character says at one point that she first got into goth through the works of Edgar Allen Poe, and all in all it seems like the author really has a good grasp of the subculture

2. The Last Dragon Chronicles by Chris d’Lacey

Okay, so a confession: it has been years since I read this series. To the point that I had to look up the title because I only remember a vague impression of the books. And I don’t think I ever finished it. But I feel they deserve a place on this list. The goth character here, Zanna, the main character’s girlfriend, and it’s not really a big deal in the books, but she’s mentioned as being a goth early on and is described in black skirts and heavy makeup and things throughout the books. I may have to go back and reread these books because I think I may have been a little young to fully get them when I first read them back in elementary school. Anyways, it’s not a big part of the books, but this isn’t a list of books about goths, it’s a list of books with them, so here it is

3. Vampire Kisses by Ellen Schrieber

Admittedly, this series is not the most highbrow of literature. It is pure teenage vampire fluff. But it is also utterly delightful, as many fluff books are.

Now, I will say: yes, these books are full of troupes and stereotypes. But they’re the kind that the subculture makes fun of itself for affectionately. The main character is obsessed with vampires, and the vampires are perhaps tied with the movie Hotel Transylvania for stereotypical appearance, but they’re great fun to read, and they portray a wide variety of goth characters representing all facets of goth, from the main character of rather mallgoth Raven, to the gentle, romantic Alexander, edgy and rebellious Jagger, femme-fatale-pastel-goth-out-for-revenge Luna, perky Scarlett, and a whole range of others. I’ve only read the fist seven books (my library doesn’t have book eight and I didn’t want to read nine before it), but they’re wonderfully fun, easy reads. There’s also a couple of manga books if that’s your thing.

4. Mall Goth by Kate Leth

Now, graphic novels are not usually my cup of tea. But the draw of good goth characters was enough for me to pick up and idly read about half of it at the library. I don’t have a super firm grasp on the plot of this book, since I was mostly skimming it, but it seems like a pretty typical teen drama book. I have no objections to the way that the alternative characters are depicted, and there are a couple of them, including the main character

Honorable mention to: My Summer as a Goth

This one is a movie, not a book, but it still deserves an honorable mention because it shows teenaged goths really well. It’s a pretty typical teen drama, and there are a few contrived coincidences and minor plot holes, but it’s overall a delightful movie with a very nice plot and lots of fun characters. One of my friends and I have taken to watching this movie repeatedly and have a wonderful time every time

If anyone has any books to add to this list, please tell me! I am always looking for more books with goth characters

[ben-the-hyena]

A good headcanon/theory @papabirdurskeks has come up with

For anyone else who doesn't ship Henchdevil but we can't deny they cherish each other

I had come up some days ago with the fact he's essentially his friend/nanny/confident/service demon. We don't know his age nor other demons', but we can suppose he was either a fallen angel too, or was born a demon. Or created a demon, and thus created by the Devil himself, which could be what Deekideke could have implied back in Summer when they said he was super caring to Devil because it was his purpose when created (and his purpose to adore him too which is a reason why I can't ship it)

Well she came up with an interesting point, which could also fit with the lore implications the Devil actually isn't so evil deeeeeeeeeep down : what if Henchman was part of his former self he materialized ? He looks nothing like other demons, is pinkish purple which seems to be a palette the Devil loves and puts everywhere, he's actually colorful even Stickler 's green is dull but Henchman is the one colorful imp, and he is the only nice demon who despite that the Devil never kills no matter how easily he kills other imps. As I had said in the previous post about their relationship it must be because he got attached to that servant he created to serve him (and is of course a di a tsundere about it) like an edgy teenager who's all "FUCK OFF MOM" but would kill for said mom. But it could also be, like Mat said, because he represents simpler, happy times. Plus, who can take better care of you than your own altered self given a consciousness ?

He obviously has issues and wants to be adored which he hides under an "I loved to be feared and hated" behavior which is probably a form of denial he adopted ever since he ceased to be an angel and accept his new life, but looking at Henchman, the last vessel of his past, naive, caring and colorful angelic self both annoys and makes him cringe for how "naive and stupid" he was and owns him bops on the head and shoving, but he also gives him fond memories just from looking at him. Henchman grew to be his own different person, with different opinions and thoughts, and the Devil knows that, yet ironically it allowed him to genuinely appreciate him more. And in a twisted way appreciate himself too

[lllecheesiestboiii]

Lore drop since the last time I spoke about these guys was back when I still used Amino 💀

The running joke with Arvo is that he’s never evolved out of his cringe phase, the evil ancient scroll (his old ref sheet) was gospel when I was reintroducing him into the Cheeseverse fr. This being said, yes. His story’s cringe has remained intact- preservation is important!

Rabbit - Arvo, Goose - Viktor, Cat - Kat (incredibly fitting, I know)

Context- There’s this weird ass demon mafia thing and the members wear animal masks (because an edgy 12 year old made this). Membership is incredibly limited and regular ass humans are only able to join through contracts- that often involve bartering with souls (cause demons). Full-fledged human members can basically earn ‘real big boy demon mafia’ status by shedding ownership o’ that lil soul and gaining immortality, as well as powers (intended to increase their ‘work’ performance (They can be enslaved/banished or killed, but it’s very difficult to do this). Enter Arvo- one of these guys. Arvo ranks very high in the system’s hierarchy and has been there for a long ass time- this also serves as his foil. Being such a long standing member, his initiation took place during an incredibly awkward transitional period where the system began to become more modernised (switching from like. Medieval looking demons to demons in suits n crap who look like they’d be named ‘Bob from accounting’). Certain rules hadn’t been established during this time- one rule standing out in particular. The human age requirement for full initiation- causing Arvo to be fourteen for the rest of eternity (poor thang). In the early years, Arvo was like any other new recruit- eager af to do spooky demon mafia shiz but, understandably, he’s become. Somewhat. Jaded over the years. Bro might LOOK like an edgy little teenager, but in reality all he wants to do is retire and spend the rest of his days smoking cigs and watching Seinfeld vacantly in a comfy ass armchair- this can’t happen, however. Bro is immortal AND tied into a contract- which also happens to be immortal. He treats his job (with, btw is killin people n other edgy demon shiz) like a dead end office job that he can't stand (which, for him, is kind of what it is 💀) Arvo is basically a miserable, pissed off manager and everyone is lowkey scared of him cause he’s high ranking, senior staff.

Other two guys. 1. Viktor. Bro is the one exception to the ‘everyone is scared of Arvo’ rule. Being fairly new, he’s been assigned to Arvo to be trained/monitored, and he’s always trying to fuck around and joke (which is a big ol’ no no in Arvo’s book). Viktor is basically a sleazy ass rat-bastard from the 1950’s and Arvo DESPISES him. Man’s also got a huge ass ego and, even though by industry standards, he’s a tiny little baby, bro thinks he's the shiz fr. Arvo, despite being immortal, feels like he has aged. Many years. Since he met Viktor.

2. Kat. Kat is fucking insane. Don't know what else to say. She’s at that point where she doesn’t hate existence yet, and is just living the dream fr. Arvo hates her too. But that’s kind of a running theme with him. Who doesn’t he hate at this point?

Also. this story is designed to be imagined in a workplace comedy/mockumentary style- think shows like The Office/The Thick of It

Cursed og murder gang gang lore

[justmybookthots]

City of Bones

Yo, I first read this book way back in secondary school. I must have been thirteen or fourteen at the time? So it's been… not gonna reveal my age, but it's been well past a decade.

I never really loved it that much as a teen—I mean, I liked it, but I wasn't crazy over it, or anything. I was more into the Virals series as a teen. Or Skulduggery Pleasant.  Or Maximum Ride but we don't talk about that.

My impression of it has kind of soured over the years because of the cheap/budget-looking ass TV series that came out. Anyways, I'd washed my hands of it until I saw that Cassandra Clare WAS STILL writing this series and milking the heck out of it. And yet SOMEHOW, it's still trending? Chain of Thorns was all over BookTok for a while, and admittedly, I was impressed by the longevity of her series. By Jove I thought everyone should be over it at this point.

Point is, I can't read Chain of Thorns and figure out why the heck it's so popular because I couldn't (and can't) for the life of me remember anything about the worldbuilding of this story. It's been over a decade. T_T

So I thought to myself: well, I might as well reread the first book. I braced myself for a world of cringe and…

It wasn't that bad?

Like, if you asked me to choose between this or Fourth Wing, it'd be this. I don't consider this a bad book, to be honest? Neither was it great, or anything, but all in all, I had a good time reading it even though YOU NEED TO KNOW HOW WARY I WAS GOING IN. I do have one thought at present: while the vocabulary in this book is pretty standard to me now, there was no way teenage / 13-year-old me had any idea what half the words here meant, lol. 

Things I didn't love:

Simon. He felt very extra and out of place the whole book. The only worthwhile contribution he made was shooting the skylight. Prior to that, he spent his time following Clary because he, uh, cared about her or something, then immediately switched his focus to Isabelle and mooned over her for half the book. Then later it turned out he was just making Clary jealous but I was like, boy. Get a life. I can't believe Jace and Clary risked their necks to save Simon the Rat (this is not me being mean. He literally turned into a rat). I'd have just left him with the vampires if I'm being honest. And Simon turning into a heck of an ingrate because he found her kissing Jace was so friggin' weird—somehow it's okay for him to flirt with girls to make her jelly, but her kissing Jace? Yeah, she's a bitch, even though she AND JACE risked their lives to save his rat ass.

The tone of the story was weird. So weird. Like it switches from dead serious to the Shadowhunters being like: "Yay! We're gonna find the Cup. This is going to be so fun!" and Jace / Isabelle just letting Simon hang around them because why not? It feels like teenagers going on an edgy adventure which kind of reduced the stakes for me. Thankfully, the tone switched to a more serious one later on.

The denouement was a little rushed regarding Alec and Isabelle, especially the former. I still don't get why Alec suddenly decided to accept Clary when he hated her guts before. It's not like Clary did anything impactful that was directly related to him. 

Did not like the "other girls" hatred Clary felt towards Isabelle, who didn't really do anything except look hot? What's wrong with looking hot? But the good thing is that so far, Clary only thought those thoughts and didn't act on her dislike towards Isabelle. On the surface, she was mostly pretty civil.

The angst Jace felt when he saw Simon in Clary's room was, um. I mean he was pretty quick to jump to conclusions and go the whole dramatic teenage route of "My life is ending because she had another guy in her bed all along". I couldn't really take his angst seriously.

A little random but: You're telling me a bunch of Shadowhunters didn't have driving licences/a car and needed Simon to drive them to Clary's house to get the Cup. I can't.

A friend pointed out that this story had some Harry Potter influence (Cassandra Clare had apparently written HP fanfic that inspired this?) and I can't unsee certain things. Jace is very much a Draco. Simon is really a mix of Ron and Harry (looks like Harry, personality more like a Ron. No wonder I can't stand him, lol. Spoiler: I hate Ron's guts). And Valentine and his Circle ARE SO Voldermort and his Death Eaters. Still, it's fine. I'm not super nettled by it. The concept of originality has always been a fine line anyway, and it's more about execution to me.

Sometimes Jace's banter was a little too much. And most of the time, Simon's banter was just annoying. I'm just a Simon-hater, can you tell?

Things I DID like:

The twist with Hodge. Didn't see that coming.

I did like the prose. It's very pretty.

Clary doesn't magically become a powerhouse combat badass, which… realistic. I like that.

The twist about Jace and his father. One thing I truly forgot after I read it years ago (or maybe I never really knew?) was that Valentine WAS the man that had raised Jace as a child. They were the same person. Valentine just assumed Michael's name. That said, I do know Jace is a Herondale, and some guy called Sebastian is Clary's real brother, so I want to know the real truth because I can't recall anything else. That will only be revealed in future books, not this one, so I'll see if I get in the mood to continue. 

MAGNUS. HE WAS MY FAVOURITE AS A TEEN AND HE IS STILL A SCENE-STEALER IN THIS BOOK. I may just read the sequel mainly because I want to see him and Alec. 🙂

My brain is kind of puttering. In any case, I can't be bothered to flesh out my review further for a book I'm reading as my literary form of 'trash reality TV' of the day. The book was fine, better than I expected, and I'll still be keeping the four stars I rated this book years ago. That's remarkable in its own way, really. (Edit: I went to check. I'd rated it three stars. Well, I'll keep that, too. Lmao.)

- 8 Nov 2023

[heyharoldsboo]

I went to an art school for high school. Everyone was smoking, drinking, doing drugs, having parties, and liking and sharing the weirdest and most alternative stuff we could find. None of that is out of the norm. Also, I'm educated now but when I when I look back at how I was as a teenager I was ABSOLUTELY stupid as hell. Like, I did shit that would make me HARD cringe today. My opinions, my stupid little dramas, shit that happened with my friends, mistakes I made, the stuff i was into - plus I definitely thought I was so edgy and unique like so many teens do. 😂 But we all grow and change and mature! I'm not crucifying someone for being a regular teenager. If people went into YOUR instagram likes, 100% they'd find something to complain about that you think is not problematic at all. If people went back through all YOUR DM's from years ago I bet they'd find shit that you wished you hadn't typed. That's life. But it's not a fucking crime. We've gone from "HE'S A RAPIST HE HAS MULTIPLE VICTIMS" to "OKAY WELL MAYBE HE DIDN'T RAPE OR SA ANYONE BUT HE'S STILL NOT THE MOST PERFECT PERSON TO EVER EXIST SO FUCK THIS GUY HE SHOULD BE ARRESTED" like do people hear themselves??? Y'all living in glass houses!!

I majored in Sociology in uni with a minor in cultural anthropology. I could tell stories that would have me linched here. I have said many times: if people went through my stuff the way they're going through Percy's? They'd find so so much shit I'm not proud of. I've been given the chance to make mistakes, and to grow. I'm more educated now than I have ever been in my life. Every single one of us is more educated now than they were 2 or 3 years ago, because we grow and change as people.

If people want to think he is a bad person and you don't want him as a role model for yourself or your kids or the next generation or I don't know, I really don't care, it's their prerrogative. But I won't stand for people trying to put being a shitty teen on the same level as being a SA or a r*pist.

Thank you anon. For opening up about your experience and for not letting people equal being a shitty teen to being a criminal.

[bumblingbabooshka]

hi hi! i just wanted to pop in and say that while i dont use this app very much, your art has been a constant inspiration for me for years and i pretty much only log on to check in lol!! i've been a fan since your oc-posting days and am just in love with the style and atmosphere of your art - i hope you have a wonderful day and i hope you never stop creating :) <3

This was such a wonderful, kind comment that I had to keep it in my inbox for a few days (ormoooore) also I had to draw something for you! Going back through my old oc art was PAINFUL, I can't believe anyone saw value in it but you know what? It was earnest, I'll give myself that. Painfully earnest but, there you go. I was an angsty teenager when I posted most of my art in love with dArKnEsS and mIsErY <- in the blandest senses of those concepts but now I'm an adult who's in love with healing and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that I couldn't as a teen. It felt inauthentic for things to be happy back then but now? Man...happiness kinda rules. So I wanted to draw some of my old old ocs where I am now, looking for that happiness and trying to take some steps forward to grasp it!

Thank you so much again for this beautiful message - it made my day every day I read it! I also hope I never stop creating, it makes me very happy to do so! Even my silly old "WoWsO eDGY!" art made me happy to draw. So I can't hate it, even if it's cringe <3

[abysskeeper]

Lemme say I relate on the Teen Edgy character backstories stuff double.

Oh, do share stories if you're so inclined ^^.

But honestly, yeah. I think anyone who indulges this hobby long enough can look back and go, "yeah...not one of my finer moments."

Trick, Chris, and Hayden are all equally survivors of that in a sea of failures, and I think that's a combination of the fact that they all work really, really well together on a thematic level...and because they were created right when I was on that cusp of teenage edge and moving into wanting to read and write stories that were desperately, spitefully hopeful regardless of the world they resided in. And the trio transitioned really, really well into that genre too.

The only other character I think I have like that was my sci-fi/zombie apocalypse character Gabi, who actually kinda sparked that whole change in me involving a short story, a creative writing class, and a round table discussion. I only got to take two creative writing courses in college, but boy were they both so worth it.

And you know what? In the end, I was a kid and I was having fun! And I learned a lot about what I did and didn't like to write and what I was good at and what needed adjustments. And a lot of my ideas stuck around! Just now I have a steadier hand and more experience to execute them as I want. So yeah, I may look back and cringe, but it was a worthwhile experience I wouldn't change anyways.