#I took off the actual celebratory bits here

[swasdoodles]

I broke 500 uploads over on dA recently so I drew a quick Loreley celebration thing.

[pyramid-of-starrs]

Saturn pt 1

“Life’s better on Saturn, got to break this pattern” -SZA

Pairing: Ex Situationship San x Black reader (reader has locs as well :3)x Maddox

Submission from: @reosbabygurl

Summary: You and San were in a long term situationship that ultimately led nowhere. Time goes by and you're in a new relationship, but how will San take that?

Word Count: 4.2Kish?

Warning: Cheating, toxic behavior, manipulation, gas lighting, rude/mean behavior, clingy, possessive, cursing, arguing, bad relationship, pregnancy mentioned

Smut warning: This chapter  there will be a small smut scene with Maddox, kissing, boob play Eventual - Breeding, kissing, pussy drunk, body worship, needy boy San, Dom San, a bit subby San, dry humping, some anal (Just fingers), phone sex, masturbation,

A/N: I had to tweak it a bit and I don't mention the reader being black with locs until a bit deeper into the story. This story has such a good plot and dialog imo so please give me lots of feedback.

Also, this is not at ALL what I think Maddox acts like T-T, I actually love and adore that man so much but wanted to switch it up with who I added into the story. This is not a representation of how anyone acts, just fun :3

Minors dni

All you ever craved was love, you just wanted to be loved properly, thoroughly, genuinely. Nothing more, nothing less. You spent a good chunk of your 20s in a situationship that ultimately led nowhere. You and San were a perfect example of “right person, wrong time”. You both wanted more from the relationship but in the end you both could never find the right time to commit. It started with you wanting to date him first but he “wanted to get to know each other more” then when he was ready you needed to focus on school. There were times when you both were ready, you both wanted to ask, but the fear of rejection held heavy on both your hearts so ultimately you both decided to fuck your feelings away. Spending endless time with each other, going on dates, kissing, hugging, having sex like any couple would. Just no real title.

But now, you were 24, he was 25 and you wanted more. You wanted to openly and happily be someone’s girlfriend. San had just started his small business, a local toy shop, something you found adorable and admirable. He had finally turned his hobby of collecting plushies and other trinkets into a business, you were proud, but still hurt when he told you he didn’t have time for a relationship at that point. You tried to understand, you wanted to convince yourself that you could wait but realistically, you couldn’t.

His friends threw him a celebratory party, that’s where you met his friend's friend, Maddox. A sweet long haired man, he was 2 years older than San and honestly didn’t even know him. He only came because his friends wanted him out of the house. You spent hours of the party just talking, you could admit, finding a replacement at your situationships probably wasn’t the best idea, but it’s not like you were doing it on purpose. San noticed, how couldn’t he. Even with the many other people begging for his attention, his eyes were fixated on you and the man that got your attention. He had enough of watching and waiting for you to be done and stormed over to you and asked for you to speak to him privately.

You argued. You argued loud enough for the party to start to hear. At that point Wooyoung thought it would be best to end it on Sans behalf. After some hours you broke things off with San, screaming that you never wanted to see him again and that you were done. And you were, you were fed up.

It took time to get over San, it was hard but Maddox really made it better. So now here you are, 2 years later, and you got what you wanted. You got someone who would be serious about you. Maddox was so serious about you that after the first year he proposed. You were not only someone’s girlfriend but now someone’s fiancé.

You stood over the stove in your shared apartment, you were cooking dinner for you and your fiancé. A firm ringed hand snaked its way around your waist.

“Mmm, it smells so good baby.” Maddox said as he planted a kiss on your cheek, his curly bang pieces tickling your face as you giggled.

“You’re actually home, I had to go all out for dinner!” You said with a big smile on your face. Maddox spent a large portion of his time working, he was a producer at an up and coming music company. You loved his passion but hated that that meant less time together, but you stayed understanding.

Maddox nervously released your waist, a weak smile painted on his face. You looked out of the corner of your eye and noticed his strange expression.

“What is it?”

“Well… about that…”

Your expression of comforted happiness immediately changes to disappointment.

“Maddox… you’re kidding right?” You had really hoped he would say he was just messing with you.

“Baby I’m sorry. I swear it’s not on purpose, I promise.”

You fully turned to face him.

“But I was really hoping to spend some time with you, we have so much planning to do, we have so much that needs to be picked out-“

“I know Y/N, I know. I just have to finish this project and I promise my attention will be all yours.” He grabbed you by your shoulders and gave you a reassuring smile. “I promise.”

“I keep hearing promises and not seeing action behind it, Maddox. You promised with your last project that you would help me plan. Our wedding is at the end of the year and it’s already March.”

“Y/N I know when our wedding is.”

“Then act like it.” you shot back.

“If you would just let me focus on getting things done then I could do that, I have to work Y/N, I have things I want to do with my life. You knew what this was when we started dating.” He released you, the tension started to build in the room.

“Whatever, hopefully marrying me is one of the things you want to do in your life eventually.” You turned away from him, returning your attention back to cooking.

“Don’t do that Y/N, don’t act like you’re not my priority. I’m not San-“ Maddox stopped in his tracks. Yes, you told Maddox all about you and San, he wondered why your were at his party that day, so you told him. He knew how much San had hurt you, he knew the situation was hard to move on from, yet every argument San was being mentioned.

“Wait, I’m sorry Y/N.”

“Just go do your project Maddox.”

“Whatever.” He scoffed. Maddox said no more, he left. No fight back, no continued apology. He packed a bag quietly. “I’m going to stay at Eden’s, call me when you’re over it.”

You hated that this wasn’t the first time this had happened. Maddox had a tendency of being hurtful but you were understanding. You knew he was just under a lot of pressure and stress with work. He put up with a lot of your baggage and you wanted to do the same for him, so you did.

The next morning you sent him a text apologizing and asking him to come home, to which you got no reply. You sighed and looked at your laptop to continue your wedding planning. You checked your emails and at least got some good news. You and Maddox had custom ordered small bears with your last name on their bows as wedding favors for your guest and they were done. You were even lucky enough to find a local toy store that sold them. “Mountain of Plush.” They were ready for pick up as soon as 12pm. Since you worked from home that day you figured you mightiest we’ll make the trip. It wasn’t a far drive, only 15 minutes, it would take your mind off things.

You got in your car and headed over, on the way you tried to call Maddox and your call was sent to voicemail on the 3rd ring.

“Give me space Y/N.” Was all Maddox texted you. You sighed. You wanted so badly to be upset but you knew what you signed up for.

You arrived at the store and parked. You walked up to the entrance and looked over the store name again. “Why does this name sound so familiar?” You said to yourself. You ignored it and walked in anyways. You looked around, the store was adorable, various toys and plushies decorated the walls and shelves. There were even some anime and cartoon figures. Just as you were looking around, a voice could be heard.

“Can I help you?” That voice. That voice made your heart stop, it made your palms sweat, it made time move in slow motion. Your eyes followed the voice and there he was.

Choi San.

You both locked into place for a moment, feeling like you saw a ghost. You hadn’t seen San since a month after you broke things off with him. He would invite you over to try to fix things, you would talk, then yell, then have sex, then leave before he woke up. One night when he tried to contact you he found himself blocked on everything.

“I-, Y/N? What- What are you doing here?” He asked.

“Uh. I’m picking up an order I placed. San, is this your shop?”

“Yeah, you don’t remember the name I picked?”

“Well yeah I remember talking about it but I was hoping you would pick something else.”

That’s when the tension was cut with San laughing, you couldn’t help but laugh with him.

“Well everyone loves my name thank you very much.”

“Yeah, sure.” You playfully rolled your eyes. You both smiled at each other, you felt warm. Even with the colder spring air outside, you felt warm at this moment. “So, how have you been San ? I see your business well.”

He returned your smile. “Yeah, I’m really lucky, business is good and this place keeps me kinda happy.”

You wanted to question the kinda part but you felt like it wasn’t your place anymore.

“Here, follow me, I’ll take you to the counter to pick up your order.” You followed him to the front of the store. He got behind the counter and looked through the orders on an iPad. “It’s funny I didn’t even see an order under your last name at all.”

That’s when you remembered why you were there. “Right… it’s actually under Moon.” You said softly.

“Moon?” San chuckled while scrolling through order names. “That’s funny, what is that a fake name you use no-“

Before he could finish that’s when he saw the reason line, he gulped, his breathing picking up.

“It’s… it’s my fiancés name… I’m getting married.” You said, chewing on your lip and keeping your eyes on the ground. Why did you feel so nervous telling him that? Why was this awkward?

“I see…” he licked his lips. “Couldn’t go to any other toy shop huh? Had to rub it in?” He nervously chuckled.

“N-no! I swear I wasn’t trying to be like that! I genuinely forgot-“ you nervously tried to respond.

“Y/n, relax it’s a joke.” He smiled, he found your reaction cute. “Hey they don’t call it “the one that got away” for nothing amiright?”

“San… I… I don’t know what to say.” You felt bad for some reason. Why did this make you feel so terrible? You broke things off with San, why did you feel like you were hurting him? It had been 2 years.

“It’s okay Y/N, I’m happy for you. I swear, I’m glad you finally found the person who could do what I couldn’t.” San was genuinely happy that someone was making you happy. Even after being blocked, being angry, being heartbroken that he lost his chance with you. All he ever wanted was for you to be happy. He was hurt that he couldn’t be the one to do it but was happy it was getting done.

You smiled. “Thank you Sannie.”

“Anyways, this order is heavy, where is the lucky so and so? You’re definitely gonna need help carrying this out.” He said tapping away on the screen then walking to the back room.

“Oh, he’s working right now. I’m sure I can handle it.” You said as he placed 2 large boxes on the counter.

“He’s making you do this by yourself? You always told me if I didn’t help with wedding stuff you would push me into the ocean.” San said with a questioning look.

“Haha, what can I say, things change.” You smiled. You were lying. Of course Maddox should be here but you were currently getting the silent treatment so there wasn’t much you could do. “Like I said I’m sure I’ll manage.”

You attempted to pick the rectangular boxes up and San lightly smacked your hands away.

“No way, here I’ll carry it for you.” San stacked the boxes and picked them up with ease.

“No, I can't ask you to do that!”

“You didn’t ask, I offered. Come on, show me to your car.”

You wanted to stop him but you knew San, he has always been chivalrous and nothing was going to stop him at that moment.

You showed him to your car and popped your trunk, he placed the boxes in.

“Ooh, fancy car. Still doing math professionally?”

You laughed.

“Yes, San, I’m still an accountant.”

“You’re better than me, I could never willingly do math.”

“You run a business San.”

“Yeah but I just assume everything’s okay, I pay rent and all that on time and can afford stock.”

“San! That’s irresponsible!”

“I’m kidding, I have a math guy too. But if you ever want a new customer let me know.” He winked. “I’ll leave him with no remorse.”

Something about that dimpled smile and wink made your heart drop a bit.

“Well, thank you for helping me San.”

He shut your trunk. “The pleasure is all mine Y/N.”

“And thank you for the bears, I saw the progress pictures and they are beautiful. The Moon symbol for free was so sweet.”

“Yeah well you know me, I’m a sweet guy.” He smiled as he shrugged.

“Well sweet guy as a thank you, how about you come to my engagement party Seonghwa is FINALLY throwing for me.”

“Oh god, he’s that mean gay guy that hates me.”

“He only hates you because he knew how much I wanted to be with you and that we never dated.”

“Yeah, guess I really blew that.” There was a brief awkward silence.

“I’m sure you two are fine now though, right? Since he’s dating your friend Hongjoongs friend Christian?”

“Oh… well. I kinda don’t talk to Hongjoong anymore.” He awkwardly scratched his head.

“Woah, what? You and Wooyoung and Hongjoong were inseparable in College. What happened?”

“Well, it’s kinda embarrassing.” He avoided your gaze.

“Try me.”

“I kinda… blamed him for introducing you to Maddox that night…”

Silence. Again.

“Oh…”

“But it’s fine I swear.”

“Well now I feel like shit.”

“Y/n don’t! It’s pretty sure you were bound to dump me anyways.” San tried consoling you.

“Um… well if you want to come I can text you the address.” You quickly changed the subject.

“Yeah, sure.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and as you watched him that’s when you noticed his body. He had on a pair of jeans and a grey fuzzy sweater with a purple apron that had his business name across it. He was much larger now, the sweater looks comically huge and cute on him.

“Actually I have the same number.” He said.

“Oh okay, I’ll text it now then.” You smiled and pulled out your phone. You texted him over the invite. His name read. “Do not text”. “Did you get it?”

“Um… you still have me blocked y/n.” He said awkwardly.

“Oh my god! I’m sorry.” You unblocked him and resent it.

“Got it.”

“Well that’s about enough awkwardness I can handle so I’ll see you there. It’s this Saturday!” You awkwardly smiled then raised your eyebrows.

San chuckled again. “Guess you’re right. I’ll see you Saturday if I’m free.”

You and San waved each other goodbye and you hated the butterflies that filled your stomach. You dropped your head on your steering wheel with your hands gripping.

“Why, why, WHY DOES HE LOOK SO DAMN GOOD?” You shouted to yourself as you lightly banged your head on the wheel. You connected your phone to your car then began to drive. “What the hell happened to karma, why did the break up make him so hot? I jus-“ Just when you were about to continue to curse the world your phone rang. Your face lit up hoping it was Maddox but instead Seonghwa’s name was plastered across your radio screen, you tapped to pick up the call.

“Hey Hwa what’s up?”

“Don’t what’s up me y/n, why did I just get an rsvp by the name “S. Choi”, this better not be who I think it is.”

You made a face, you knew he would kill you but you just wanted to be nice, you didn’t think San would actually come.

“Yeah, so remember the teddy bear thing? Turns out they came from Sans Shop.” You sighed.

“Ian… Ian…CHRISTIAN!” You could hear Seonghwa yelling for Christian to get his attention as if you weren’t on the phone anymore.

“Yes my love?” You could hear Christian reply vaguely.

“Remind me to fucking kill Hongjoong with my bare hands.” Seonghwa said.

“Of course my love.”

“Wait, why are you killing Hongjoong?” You asked, confused about what this meant.

“Hongjoong is the one that told me to tell you about that shop, I’ll never trust that sneaky bastard again.” You could hear the irritation in his voice.

“Oh calm down Hwa, it’s one night with him.”

“And I’m expected to believe he’s going to behave?”

“He’s changed Seonghwa, I talked to him for a while, he’s mature and sweet and… and-“

“And fine as hell and buff.” Seonghwa said, finishing your sentence.

“Th-that’s not what I was going to say!” You started to feel hot.

“Mhm, yeah, well I follow the son of a bitch on Instagram and I’ve seen him. He’s a sculpted, tan beauty.”

“Just gonna say that in front of Ian huh?”

“Oh I agree.” Ian said faintly.

“And Christian knows I would never leave him for that ass. Anyways, I don’t need that Greek god coming around and breaking up the engagement I worked- I mean you and Maddox worked so hard for.” He softened his voice towards the end.

“I’m not going to leave Doxxie for San, Jesus have some faith! San will come, see how happy and in love I am and then admit defeat for himself and go about his day.”

A deep and soulful sigh left Seonghwa. “Listen, if you want to trust that weasel that’s on you and your simple brain.”

“Hey!”

“But stop candy coating the past and trying to always find the good. You and San never technically dated and yet he broke your heart so bad. Not to mention the possessive nature he had. Me and you could barely talk without him wanting you home. The guy isn’t great!”

Right… you tried to ignore those things about San. Like Seonghwa said you two never dated but towards the end of your situationship San could feel you becoming more and more dissatisfied. The resolution to that in his mind? Love bombing. He would buy you random gifts, take you out more, go the whole 9 yards. But over time, it developed into something else. You would tell people you were single, because that was the truth right? But San would hold your hand and kiss you in public or at parties just to… assert dominance? He would get mad at you talking to other men, he would cling to you everywhere you went. It became suffocating after so long.

“I know Seonghwa…” you sounded like a child being scolded.

“…he can come. Just please don’t do anything irrational. I know you’re weak for him.”

When you finally arrived at your apartment, you saw Maddox’s car in its designated space.

“Ah! Sorry Hwa I gotta go, love you bye!”

You could hear Seonghwa try to tell to hold on but you hung up. You didn’t bother trying to get the box from the car and immediately rushed into the house. Upon opening the door you saw a large bouquet of flowers on the kitchen island.

“Hello beautiful.” Maddox said as he appeared from the bedroom.

“Oh Doxxie, thank you.” You met him half way and welcomed him into a big hug.

“Anything for you my love." He pecked your lips. "Are you excited for Sunday?"

You raised your eyebrow in confusion. "You mean Saturday?"

"Oh fuck, right Saturday!" He finally released you. "I have a little work to do then I'll head home and meet you there when I'm dressed."

You folded your arms. "Maddox... we were supposed to be riding together..."

"Oh shit, sorry, yeah we'll ride together, sure."

"...are you sure?"

"Yes, Of course baby." He gave you another kiss to get your mind off things, this one lingered. He held your waist as the kiss got deeper.

"Mmm, Doxxie, hah, wait." You said as his kisses traveled down your neck.

"Why? We have to make up, don't we?" He said as he sucked your brown skin on your neck, his hands were already moving your locs to the side so he could have more access.

You giggle and take his hands off your neck to hold one and lead him to the bedroom. "Come on, let's go to our room."

He laid you down softly, the soft blanket against your skin. He crawled on top of you and before chasing you down he looked over you.

"My beautiful girlfriend."

Girlfriend? Your arms reached up to wrap around his neck. "You mean fiancé and soon to be wife."

"Oh I know, just wanted to hear you say it." He smiled before finally kissing your lips again.

Your lips both passionately danced on each other, you could feel Maddox's hand coast the side of your torso until he found the end of your shirt then slid it inside. The feeling of lace met his fingertips as he cupped one of your boobs. He began to massage the pillow like mound of fat while his lips made their way down your neck. In a swift movement he released your chest to remove your shirt and helped take off your bra as well. He gave one of your nipples a few kisses before he latched on to it with his mouth, his other hand gripping the other. Soft moans continued to escape your lips while your hips mindlessly moved, wanting more.

His hand made its way into your leggings to begin to rub your clothed heat, wetness already building up.

"Already ready for me baby?"

"Always."

You two exchange the few words then lock lips again. You both rushed to remove the remainder of your clothes. You laid on your back, bare, in front of a naked Maddox while he lined himself up with your entrance. Just as he was about to begin pushing inside of you his phone began to ring. The loud default ringer going off on the bed while it shook due to the vibrations, his eyes darted to it.

"oh fuck." He whispered to him.

"Doxxie..."

Maddox looked between you and his phone.

"Could you just give me one-"

"Maddox!" You shouted as he winced while grabbing the phone.

"I swear I'll just be a second!"

He saw the look in your eyes, the look of sadness and disappointment, all you wanted was a moment with him. You just wanted to feel prioritized.

He swiped the bar to answer the call while mouthing an apology.

"Hello?" He said while taking his stance, you swiftly grabbed his arm.

"At least stay with me."

"Y/n, let go." He whispered away from the phone.

You deeply sighed and let him walk away, like a kid throwing a temper tantrum you decided to pull the covers over your head and pout.

After about 30 minutes he finally came back looking satisfied.

"Alright sorry about that-"

He found you still balled up under the covers.

"Just go Maddox..." Your voice filled with sadness as you knew what was next.

"I haven't even said anything."

"What are you going to say then?" You continued to keep your head under the cover.

"...I have about 15 minutes, do you maybe wanna-"

"It's fine Doxxie, just go to work." You kept telling yourself that you knew what this was, you knew what Maddox's job was. But how much more could you really take?

"...fine." He began to gather the rest of his clothes, you were going to just let him go but you would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't speak up.

"When are we going to have time for us Maddox?" your voice is weak and unstable.

Silence, he opted to not respond and left.

Part 2 is coming very soon...

[psychoticallykind]

Going Home

"Support" - Jegulus Microfic - @into-the-jeggyverse - 611 words

--------------------------------------------------------------

"I don't want to be here," Regulus mumbled, subtly leaning against his boyfriend.

James wrapped an arm around his waist. "So let's go home."

"We can't," he replied. He took a deep breath. "Barty said that he needs the extra moral support."

"He'll survive, love. I promise." James swayed them a little, and it was almost like they were dancing, though the slow, easy movement didn't match the loud club music even a little bit. "If you want to leave, we can leave. We can blame it on me, yeah?"

Regulus considered it. Then he sighed, giving up on the idea. "No, he'll be upset, and I really don't want to deal with an upset Barty."

"Alright," James rubbed up and down Regulus's arms, adding just the right amount of pressure. "What if he and Evan get together? Then we could leave, right?"

"Yes," Regulus conceded. That was why they were here, after all - Barty was trying to get the courage to tell Evan he liked him. "But it's highly unlikely it'll happen."

"Hmm." James was quiet for a minute, and Regulus knew he was thinking it over.

Then, with the easy confidence that James wore so well, he said, "I can do it."

Regulus tried to weigh James's track record against Barty's stubbornness. "What's your plan?"

"You go and get Evan," James replied. "I'll talk to Barty. Try and make sure he sees you coming."

Regulus nodded, turning in James's hold to press a kiss to his collarbone. "Alright. What will you say?"

"I'll mention how many free drinks Evan has received tonight," James grinned. "And how many of them came from cute guys with more courage than Barty."

That...might work, actually. Barty hated it when other people flirted with Evan, and he never backed down from a challenge.

Combining the two things was, all in all, a decent plan.

"I'll grab Evan." And Regulus was off, making his way through the dense crowd of strangers and quickly locating one of his best friends.

"Reg," Evan greeted him cheerfully, glancing around quickly. "Where's James? I didn't think you'd let him go tonight."

"He's with Barty," Regulus replied. He tipped his head in a 'follow me' gesture. "Which is where we're going."

Evan followed him with a light shrug. "Okay. Any reason?"

"Not that I'm giving you." Because I want to leave, and for that to happen Barty needs to no longer require moral support.

They arrived at the table in time to see Barty glare at James - who was probably smirking specifically to get on his nerves. He spotted them quickly enough, and the glare melted as he met Evan's eyes.

Regulus barely refrained from rolling his.

"Reg!" James held out a hand and tugged Regulus back against him. "Evan, hey. What happened to that guy you were dancing with earlier? He looked interested."

"He was," Evan shrugged again, giving James an easy smile. "But I wasn't." He looked at Barty, glancing over him quickly. "You're quiet."

"Yeah, I -" Barty glances at James, and then back to Evan. "Come outside with me."

Evan's eyebrows rise in surprise, but he just shrugs. "Sure, Bat."

Regulus watches them leave together. "Think it'll be enough?"

"Give it ten minutes," James promised.

Sure enough, Regulus gets a text nine minutes later.

Going home with Ev. Tell James I won.

Regulus laughed, spinning around to pull James into a celebratory kiss. "I love you so much."

"Worked, then?" James's grin was wide. Regulus was pretty sure it matched his own.

"It worked," Regulus replied happily, showing James the screen. "Let's go home?"

James nodded in agreement. "Of course." He kissed Regulus's forehead. "Let's go home."

[ducktoo]

Syncing Dream [Aespa x M!Reader]

7. Company Dinner

Note: final chapter of arc 1! Enjoy!

Masterlist here

The restaurant buzzed with chatter, laughter echoing through the private room where aespa, their dancers, and the staff gathered for a well-deserved company dinner. The mood was celebratory—relief and excitement still hanging in the air after their stunning performance at MAMA the previous night.

Y/n sat at the end of the long table, feeling a pleasant mix of exhaustion and pride. MAMA had been a whirlwind, and he was still trying to process how everything had gone so smoothly—despite the near disasters backstage. He took a sip of his drink, grateful that the year-end madness had subsided, even if just for tonight.

“You seem lost in thought again,” Winter’s voice pulled him out of his reverie. She was seated beside him, her signature smirk teasing at her lips. “Let me guess, you’re already planning how to avoid next year’s MAMA?”

“First off, I’ll be fired if I do that.” Y/n chuckled, shaking his head. “Second, I’m just still processing how none of you broke anything backstage. I was one misplaced costume away from a heart attack.”

Karina, across from him, gave a small, knowing nod. “Considering the disasters you averted, you did well, Y/n. Much better than I thought you would.”

Giselle leaned in, grinning. “Much better than the time you nearly sent our mics to the wrong stage. Or when you tried to call Karina ‘boss’ and nearly had a meltdown.”

Y/n laughed, a light flush creeping into his cheeks. “Yeah, yeah, I’m still learning. But I think we’ve all grown a bit since then.”

“Well, except Ningning,” Winter added, poking her cheek. “She’s still a menace.”

“Hey! You’re in this too, Minjeong-unnie!” Ningning shot back, pretending to be offended before flashing a mischievous smile. “Menace or not, I know how to make a show work.”

The conversation flowed easily, with everyone reflecting on the hectic moments leading up to MAMA. The dancers shared their own anecdotes from rehearsals, and even the staff couldn’t help but throw in a few teasing jabs at Y/n for his rookie manager mistakes. Despite the jokes, there was a shared warmth and camaraderie—proof of how much they’d been through together.

As the dinner progressed, the topic naturally shifted to dancing, with the dancers discussing favorite moments from past performances. And then, as if sensing an opportunity for fun, Giselle leaned in, eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Speaking of dancing…” Giselle began, glancing at Y/n. “Back then, we made Y/n danced to Drama. And honestly, he actually killed it”

Y/n froze, his eyes widening in surprise. “Oh sh- not that one, Aeri!”

Winter immediately jumped in, her face lighting up. “Oh,yeaa that one? We should've recorded it instead. Even though he was a trainee ages ago, his skill is still there”

Y/n’s face flushed as the table erupted in excitement laughter. He tried to backtrack, but the girls weren’t letting him off the hook so easily.

Karina’s smirk grew wider as she chimed in. “One time, I walked in on him practicing the chorus of ‘Next Level’ in the practice room late one night. He looked like he was preparing for his own debut.”

The table howled with laughter, and Y/n buried his face in his hands, groaning. “I wasn’t practicing! I was just… stretching and want to burn the midnight oil.”

Ningning shot him a disbelieving look, barely containing her amusement. “Stretching? While doing the entire routine, perfectly in sync?”

Winter was practically in tears at this point, leaning against Y/n as she caught her breath from laughing. “I knew you had it in you. Trainee instincts never die.”

Y/n sighed, knowing there was no escaping this. “Fine, fine. Maybe I was practicing a little. But you guys are pros—I had to at least keep up when I’m watching rehearsals. Plus, you guys made me pumped up.”

Giselle raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. “Oh? Does that mean you’ve been secretly hoping to dance on stage with us, idiot?”

The teasing was relentless, but before Y/n could protest again, the table erupted in cheers and calls for him to show his moves.

“No way, Minjeong” he said quickly, waving his hands. “Guys, not happening.”

But the girls weren’t backing down. “Come on, Y/n!” Ningning said, practically bouncing in her seat. “You killed it during our first practice we made you do. Don’t pretend you’re rusty.”

Giselle joined in, pointing towards an open space near the table. “Yeah, no more excuses. Let’s see what our secret dancer has got.”

Y/n groaned as all eyes turned to him. “You guys are going to regret this. Play Next Level and let me ruin your song.”

With a deep breath, he stood up, mentally preparing himself for the impending embarrassment. The girls cleared a small space, eager to see what he’d do.

Y/n took a moment to shake off the nerves, trying to ignore the amused glances from everyone around him. Then, with a smirk, he started moving. The familiar beat of “Next Level” played in his mind as he hit the moves he had been secretly practicing, one after the other.

Surprisingly, the rhythm came back to him effortlessly. His body responded on instinct, the fluidity and sharpness in his movements surprising even him. The table erupted in cheers and laughter, and Y/n, finding his confidence again, threw in a few extra moves to finish with flair.

When he finally stopped, out of breath but grinning, the entire room clapped and cheered, with Giselle whistling loudly.

“That was awesome!” Ningning exclaimed, her eyes wide. “I didn’t know you still had it in you!”

Winter patted him on the back, still laughing. “See? We knew you’d been holding out on us.”

Karina, arms crossed but a smile tugging at her lips, nodded approvingly. “Not bad, Y/n. Guess you’ve still got a few tricks up your sleeve.”

Y/n flopped back into his seat, grabbing his drink. “Alright, that’s it. No more dance requests for the rest of the night. And please don't feed their ego, guys.” He jokingly whined to the dancers.

“Deal,” Winter said with a wink. “But only because you’ve earned it, idiot.”

The night continued with more stories and laughter, and eventually, the conversation returned to their performance at MAMA, with the dancers sharing their own highlights and the girls recounting the nerves they’d felt before stepping on stage.

As the evening continued, Winter nudged Y/n again, her expression softening as the teasing atmosphere quieted. “Ya, you really held everything together last night,” she said, her voice sincere. “Thanks for being there for us.”

Y/n smiled, feeling the warmth of her words. “It’s my job. But, honestly, I’m proud of all of you. Especially you, crybaby.”

"Tsk. Said the one who messed up the prop." Winter pouted, which made Y/n laughed.

They had each other’s backs, both on and off the stage.

-

The company dinner had wrapped up later than expected, the restaurant buzzing with the sounds of laughter and celebration long into the night. As the group filed out of the private room, it was clear that not everyone had paced themselves as well as Ningning, who was casually chatting with one of the dancers, completely unfazed by the alcohol. In contrast, Karina, Winter, and Giselle weren’t exactly in top form.

Y/n stood at the exit, eyeing the scene before him with a growing sense of dread. He had never been much of a drinker—actually, he hadn’t touched alcohol at all. As a former trainee, it was always drilled into him to stay focused and avoid distractions, so the idea of drinking had never appealed to him. Meanwhile, these girls were in varying stages of tipsy.

Karina, who had remained composed throughout dinner, was now giggling softly to herself, eyes half-lidded as she leaned against the wall.

Giselle was busy trying to say something, but the words kept coming out in broken fragments as she waved her hands around in animated confusion.

Winter was a different story altogether—normally cool and composed, she was now slumped against a chair, occasionally giggling and mumbling random things about the universe and her unspoken love for bougee ramen.

Ningning, of course, looked fresh as a daisy. She glanced at Y/n, her mischievous eyes gleaming. “Looks like it’s up to us, Y/n-oppa.”

Y/n sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Why do I feel like I should’ve expected this?”

Ningning grinned, clapping him on the back. “Don’t worry, I’ll help. I have superhuman alcohol tolerance.”

To remind everyone, this girl had multiple shots of whiskey and vodka. Plus, she downed a bucket of beer.

“…I want to ask how but I'm glad you do.” Y/n muttered, glancing at Karina, who had started humming a tune while tracing patterns on the wall.

Y/n took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for what was surely going to be a long journey home. He crouched down next to Winter, who was now quietly mumbling something about the stars.

“Jeong-ah,” Y/n called softly, shaking her shoulder gently. “Come on, we need to get you home.”

She blinked up at him, her normally sharp eyes now glassy. “Y/n,” she slurred, her voice slow and thoughtful. “Did you ever wonder... why your ramen is so perfect?”

Y/n bit back a smile. “I’ll tell you all about it on the way home, okay? Let’s get up.”

With some effort, he managed to get Winter onto her feet, draping her arm over his shoulder. Ningning, meanwhile, had corralled Giselle, who was still trying to string coherent sentences together.

“I don’t understand how the world... like, exists, if something like the Shibuya Incident happened” Giselle was saying, her words trailing off as Ningning guided her out of the restaurant. “It’s just... Like legit imagine it.”

Y/n was about to follow when he heard Karina’s voice. “Y/n...”

He turned to see her still standing against the wall, looking at him with an expression that was somewhere between confusion and amusement. “You’re... really nice.”

Y/n blinked, thrown off by the sudden compliment. “Pff. Uh, thanks, Jimin. You too. Now let’s get you home, yeah?”

Karina nodded, though her feet didn’t quite follow her brain’s instructions. She stumbled slightly, and Y/n rushed over, catching her before she could fall. She looked up at him with a slightly dazed smile, and for a moment, the tension that had always existed between them seemed to disappear.

“Thanks, Y/n,” she mumbled, leaning into him.

Y/n’s face heated slightly as he helped her steady herself. He had never seen her this... vulnerable before. Usually, she was all business, cool and composed. It was strange, seeing her like this—but also oddly comforting, in a way. She was human, after all.

“Let’s go,” he said, keeping his voice steady as he led her out of the restaurant.

The drive back to the dorms was slow, but thankfully not too eventful. Y/n and Ningning managed to keep everyone in line, despite the occasional hiccups. At one point, Winter started singing a nonsensical song about ramen, which Giselle tried to harmonise with, but ended up laughing too hard to continue.

Ningning, the ever-efficient helper, stayed by Y/n’s side the whole time, making sure none of the girls wandered off or tripped over their own feet when heading towards the car and eventually the dorm.

“You know,” she said as they neared the dorms, “you’re handling this a lot better than I thought you would.”

Y/n shot her a tired look. “That’s because I have no other choice.”

Ningning laughed. “True. But you’re still doing great, oppa.”

Y/n and Ningning managed to get the girls inside without too much trouble, though Winter did insist on stopping by the vending machine to get some ramen snacks, which Y/n had to gently steer her away from.

Once they were inside, Y/n helped Karina to her room. She had been mostly quiet during the walk, her usual sharpness dulled by the alcohol. When they finally reached her door, she turned to him, her expression soft.

“Thanks,” she murmured, her voice low and sincere. “For everything.”

Y/n paused, surprised by the tone of her voice. “It’s no big deal. Just part of the job.”

She nodded, but there was something more behind her eyes—something he couldn’t quite place. Before he could think too much about it, she smiled again, though this time it was a bit more teasing.

“You should drink with us next time,” she said, her words slightly slurred but playful.

Y/n laughed softly. “I’ll think about it. Now get some rest.”

With that, he gently closed the door behind her, exhaling a long breath. As he turned, he found Winter standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall and looking surprisingly alert for someone who had been so out of it just minutes ago.

“Thanks, Y/n,” she said, her voice soft. “For taking care of us.”

Y/n smiled, feeling a warmth spread through him at her words. “Anytime.”

She gave him a sleepy grin before retreating to her room, leaving Y/n standing in the hallway, alone with his thoughts. He couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of accomplishment—not just for surviving the night, but for how far they had all come together.

Just as he was about to head home, Ningning appeared beside him, looking completely unbothered by the chaos of the night. “Hey, Y/n-oppa,” she said with a mischievous glint in her eye. “Good job tonight. Maybe next time, we’ll let you handle it all on your own.”

Y/n laughed, shaking his head. “Please don’t.”

Ningning winked before heading to her room, leaving Y/n standing in the dimly lit hallway, smiling to himself. Despite the exhaustion, despite the chaos, he couldn’t help but feel grateful for nights like this.

[moonlight-prose]

accidentally staring a bit too long at their lips w/ fritz bestie please i am begging he has kissable lips 😩

EARTH ANGEL

a/n: because manny jacinto is finally showing up my dash constantly, i felt like i had to write something for the one and only fritz. this is courtesy of us just screaming about him. a nonstop convo about how beautiful he is. also cause top gun summer 3.0 is necessary when the weather hits 90 and you want to crawl out of your skin. this is unedited and beta read by you babes.

summary: what does it mean to belong to someone? to be stuck in their gravitational pull, to feel that cosmic connection that makes breathing difficult when they were away.

OR a dance, a song, and the aspect of forever all leads to one conclusion. falling in love with fritz was inevitable.

word count: 3.2k+

pairing: bill ‘fritz’ avalone x f!reader

warnings: so much fluff it’s scary, romance, the hopefulness of two hopeless romantics, fluff, flirty vibes from our man fritz, he's obsessed it's so cute, the good gooey feelings that make people do stupid things for love.

Celebratory cheers bounced off the walls as you did your best not to get knocked on your ass. People crowded the bar, beer in their hands and requests for more flying off their lips. And you did what you could to sink into the corner. Away from those that were already on the road to slurring their words given the demeanor of the setting. People were floating on cloud nine. Over the damn moon as the mission they stressed over suddenly became a success.

The condensation dripped onto your hand, slipping down your wrist when you took a sip. You should have wiped it away on your sundress, but the scene before you distracted every one of your senses. Rooster was three beers in, a shot of something amber beside him, as he sang at the top of his lungs. His fingers danced over the keys.

Surprising given that he was tipping over the piano, his eyes glazed and gleaming. A group of pilots you tried to make sense of practically fell beside him, their voices shouting above the others. The serenity of bliss drawn on their faces. You figured they were the ones who'd accomplished the job.

"Can I buy you a drink honey?" The drunken slur of a pilot tripping his way towards you nearly threw you off, but with a tip of your beer and a lazy smile you watched him accept defeat. His eyes already set to a redhead seated at the bar - her gaze locked on him with a hunger you only felt for one man.

"You shouldn't hide away," Phoenix called, sliding into the corner with you, two beer necks wrapped in each hand. Another round to kill the stress of the day—to remember they weren't just pilots.

You grinned. "Who says I'm hiding?"

A quirk of her eyebrow and a murmured mhm called you out faster than you anticipated. Hiding wasn't the prerogative. If you had another beer in your system, you'd be sitting by Rooster attempting to match his note for one of your own. But celebration wasn't to be had if the one you were waiting for hadn't waltzed through the door yet. His friends trailing behind him, wolf whistles traded for smirks from pretty women at the bar.

"He'll be here soon," she said, nodding towards the door. "Mav kept them longer than usual."

"Who says I'm waiting for someone?"

She laughed, a shrug thrown your way as she meandered through the mess of rowdy pilots. "Who says you're not?"

Any other pilot would have figured you wanted away from the noise, any of them wouldn't have seen how your eyes fell to the door whenever it swung open. But Phoenix...she could see the faint emotion that shone in your eyes. She saw how you laughed a bit harder in his presence, how he actually talked longer, how your hands brushed when you thought no one was looking. You were an open book, and Phoenix was rapidly turning the pages to see how this particular story came to an end.

"Phoenix—"

The call fell on deaf ears as she rejoined her boys. A seat procured for her by the pool table within seconds. They may give her shit left and right, but you caught the way respect bled from their hearts when she entered the scene. A comradery that left even you breathless.

They'd die for each other.

They nearly had.

You nearly wondered what that felt like: being so in tune with someone your whole body lit up when they entered a room. Yet the echo of the door swinging open—a cheer of a voice you recognized - yanked the breath from your lungs. Seconds passed like hours, and the hair on the back of your neck stood to attention, as you turned. Already searching the crowd for that someone—the other half of your cosmic connection.

If you had a favorite color before catching sight of his eyes, you couldn't remember it. The inclination of your favorite song was diminished the second his laughter fell upon your senses. You suddenly couldn't recall a day where you didn't breathe for him, where your life didn't hold meaning unless you shared a smile and said hello. He'd become the sun, and you found you didn't mind being dragged into his gravitational pull. As long as you could orbit around him without end.

"Penny!" Harvard yelled over the noise of Rooster doing encore number three of Great Balls of Fire. "Three beers please and thank you!"

You smiled into your beer, the bitter flavor flooding your taste buds as a third member of the dynamic duo appeared in their midst. His head turning, eyes flicking through the throng of people, as he searched rapidly. He smiled at Yale, nodded his head at a woman who rammed into him, and finally caught your gaze with a deep exhale.

And suddenly...you could breathe properly again.

He mumbled his farewells, snuck the beer off the counter, and slipped quietly towards you.

People believed he remained silent because Harvard and Yale were loud enough for him. You found he had plenty to say. As long as someone was willing to listen. If it were up to you, he'd never stop talking. Simply so you could hear the deep echo of his voice on a constant loop. Your favorite tune, ever since he caught your eye at basic training. The question of an empty chair beside you suddenly turning into so much more.

"You're still in your flight suit," you said, hoping the light airiness of your voice was enough to avoid thinking about how your skin turned hot the second he showed up.

When it came to Fritz...you became aware of yourself in a way that didn't exist. How you moved, how you spoke.

Before him you were in darkness. He simply figured out how to turn on the switch and allow light in.

"Yeah," he let out another breath, sipping at his beer. You tracked the drip of condensation that fell on his neck, your stomach twisting at the sight. "We got the ritual speech of why we didn't go. You know the one."

"Ah. The I'm sorry but you're still a great pilot speech."

He smiled and the ground vanished beneath you. "That exact one actually."

"I'm sure he...added a cherry on top of the bullshit."

Fritz choked, laughter spilling from his lips like a contagion you longed to catch. When he felt joy, you partook. When he laughed, you couldn't help yourself. He was an addiction. The reason why you even came to San Diego in the first place.

Whether he knew that was a different story altogether.

"I'm guessing you made it out early." His eyes fell to your white sundress, red flowers sprinkled along the near sheer fabric. "Nice dress," he mumbled into his drink, eyes a bit darker than before as they trailed upwards, stopping briefly at the way it was pulled into a tie above your breasts.

You'd done it into a mess of a bow, hoping the look didn't resemble too much of a present. His gaze barely came up to your eyes before falling again, transfixed by the sight. And you found you didn't mind if he unwrapped you with the same glee as a kid on his birthday. You wanted him to.

"Thanks," you replied softly, the quick echo of your heart deafening against the noise of the bar.

Rooster's name was being chanted like a prayer, his body shimmying and swaying as he began to start up another round of the same song. People were more than happy to sing along with him. Until the familiar hum of the jukebox prickled in the air, a slow song blaring from the speakers. You leaned up on your toes, eyes catching the sight of Hangman appearing from the back of it with a glare on his face. His middle finger directed towards a half drunk Rooster; who met him with a finger of his own.

"Serves Rooster right," you began, turning back to Fritz with a flutter of your skirt. "That would have been number four."

He snorted. "Only Rooster wouldn't get hit for that."

"Oh I'm pretty sure Hangman was five seconds away from it."

The Penguins crooned softly as people began to calm slightly, dispersing to tables and disappearing out the back towards the firepit. And you stood there silently with Fritz, your beer now tepid and disgusting. If you had the chance, you'd have asked him to head out to the firepit, but he turned back towards the bar. Probably for one more drink.

"Right." You pulled at the skirt of your dress.

You wanted to play it back, say something entirely different. Ask him to join you by the fire pit with another beer in his right hand and your palm in his left. But the words were stuck like molasses in the back of your throat, fighting against release. Phoenix was begrudgingly dancing with Bob, her lips refusing a smile that you knew lingered beneath the surface. And Fanboy sat beside Payback, crooning the lyrics as best they could.

The temptation to join them pulled at your chest, an echo of that yearning for comradery appearing again. Perhaps if you asked Fritz he'd say yes. You could follow their lead, enjoy the night before you went your separate ways once more.

You could pretend to be whole for one night.

And life would feel worth living.

"Hey Avalone—" You were stopped short by the sight of his hand stretched towards yours, his lips in a small smile that screamed hope. That pleaded for an answer to this unspoken question.

Like the rest of them...you replied silently. With the belief that words simply weren't enough in this situation.

Slipping your hand into his, you allowed him to lead you towards the empty spot near Phoenix and Bob. Dazed and slightly worried that the singular beer you drank was affecting you more than it should. Even as the actual reason had your hand clasped tight. You wanted to ask what effect he held over you, what intangible bond he created without your knowledge. It might give you an explanation as to why you felt this way: stuck in a dream filled haze, with only his light to guide you out.

And maybe one day Fritz would tell you he gripped you so tight for fear of him tripping. Maybe he'd finally explain why he told you so much, why his body buzzed the second you walked in a room. Maybe he'd tell you that he suspected he loved you after watching you fly a jet, but knew he loved you when you nearly toppled him over playing volleyball on the beach.

But for now...he expressed what he could without words. Afraid that if he opened his mouth, he'd say the wrong ones.

With a swift turn, he tugged you closer on unsteady feet. A full smile pulling at his lips when you grasped his shoulders for balance.

He wouldn't let you fall. Not here...not in the sky as your wingman, and certainly not out of the love you felt for him. People said this emotion was fleeting. A lost fictitious hope that merely existed with words on a page, but there was no denying how his heart grew warmer when you were near. How he knew he could speak to you for hours at a time, yet never run out of things to say.

You were it.

That indescribable thing no one could give a name to.

"I didn't take you for the dancing type," you joked, swallowing around your nerves that jumped across your skin.

He stepped closer, his arm slipping around your waist. The way your chest hitched didn't go unnoticed by him; although rather than mention it, he put you out of your misery and kept speaking.

"I'm not."

"Let me guess...it's the song?"

He shrugged, swaying you into a gentle step you could follow with ease. "Well...it's not not the song."

A quick glance over told you that the Daggers were eyeing the both of you with great interest. As if you and Fritz were the entertainment they'd been searching for all night. The turning point of a love story they'd been a part of for years. The page sat ready to be turned, the final line of the novel practically burning a hole through the back cover, yet you couldn't read what it said.

"So it's...only the song?"

"No." If it were any other night, you'd be sharing a plate of nachos at a booth somewhere in the back. He'd be three stories deep into a conversation, and you'd be falling a bit harder the longer you listened.

Tonight however, he seemed—nervous.

"No?" You wanted to pry open his thoughts, see what he believed this was—what you were to him.

"If it wasn't the song? If I asked you because of something else, what would you do?" His hand clutched yours a bit tighter, the familiar callous on the base of his wrist helped keep you grounded.

"Depends on what it is." You sucked in a breath. "Will I...I've been thinking—"

"Yes?"

Your eyes met his softened gaze, the echo of an emotion you couldn't place shone in the deep brown. And you wanted to beg him to explain it to you. To tell you everything he'd never said out loud, in the hopes they mimicked what you held near and dear to your heart every day.

"Ever since I've known you...um..." Getting it out felt as if you were attempting to delicately attempt a surgery - prying them free from your chest with a chisel. "Actually since the day we met...fuck...it's not easy to say."

He tugged you a bit closer as he turned. "I know." He smiled, eyes falling to your lips, the curve of their shape, how they formed around his name. "It's not just the song. It's you."

Breathing no longer existed as the beat of your heart went haywire. Could he feel the pulse of it on your wrist? The way it bent and twisted as if leaping from your chest. You wanted to respond, tell him all the things that went unspoken, but once he found his words...they refused to go unheard.

"It's always been you. I should have told you before tonight. Believe me—I wanted to. You have no idea how much I wanted to tell you." He let out a soft breathy laugh and you could practically taste his words on your tongue. "And I think you knew."

"Will..." Your teeth sunk into the flesh of your bottom lip, eyes falling to his as the words you longed to hear finally left them.

"I love you." The sting of tears burned your eyes, your hand clutching his shoulder harder as he kept going. "Since the first day." He laughed nervously and an image of him, you, and a house flashed through your mind. "Well actually. The day you knocked me on my ass playing volleyball is when I knew for sure."

"Yeah?" you murmured, fighting back the stream of tears.

He seemed to catch how the light illuminated them, his hand slipping from yours to cup your cheek. "Yeah. Only my girl could be that competitive."

His girl.

The story was written the day you greeted him with a smile. The ending inscribed into your futures with permanent ink, carved into the rock of your headstones. And you could see it now—the familiar dip in the road that matched his perfectly. Falling in love with Fritz was always in the cards. A play you had no choice but to make.

He was your forever the second you shared the same oxygen.

"Fritz..."

He smiled, thumb running across the apple of your cheek. "Yeah baby?"

Chills ran down your spine as heat spilled into your stomach. The polarity of the two nearly toppled you to the ground, but he held you tight. Unwilling to let you go.

The song was slowly coming to the final chorus—the noise of the bar didn't register to your ears anymore as you hung onto his every word. Desperate for him to say those three words over and over and over. Until he lost all the breath in his lungs.

"I hope you know I love you."

His lips pulled into a smile that held your attention in its grasp. What you wouldn't give to see that every morning and night. To be the sole reason why something so beautiful appeared. He smiled and you felt the gravity beneath your feet give way, your stomach bursting to life with a flurry of butterflies.

"I should have said it before this mission. Or even a year ago. But I was scared you didn't feel the same wa—"

With a soft chuckle, he dipped down slightly, catching your lips with his softly. And every thought, every explanation you could give him, died on your tongue. He was gentle with you, as if this was a new version of the dance you'd shared throughout the years. The steps, familiar yet foreign enough to trip you up. It wasn't until you sucked in a sharp breath through your nose, your hand finding its way to the hair on the base of his neck, did the hesitation fall away.

He itched to haul you to his chest and properly kiss you. But the burn of eyes prickled along his back. There was an audience, witnesses to the first step into your future, and Fritz felt himself tense slightly. If he had a choice, he'd show you how long he wanted this. How he ached for this.

He'd make up for lost time.

The song filtered to an end, a new one he couldn't place starting up. He refused to pull away.

With a sigh, you melted into his hold, a noise echoing in the back of your throat as his tongue slid along yours. The tang of his beer mixing with yours. He kissed you with the promise of more, the knowledge that tonight you'd take his hand and follow him home. You felt his hand bunch the skirt at your back, fingers digging into your waist, and you moaned softly—desperate for his skin to sear yours.

"Get a room, lovebirds!" Hangman shouted, leaning against the jukebox beer in hand. Yet he let the quarter in his hand slide through the slot, another love song clicking to life as he complained with a smile.

Fritz jolted back, his lips swollen and vibrating. He could still taste you on his tongue, still hear the echo of your moan in his head. You looked dazed, almost lovestruck. And suddenly he understood what it really meant to be hungry.

"Remind me to thank Hangman later," he mumbled against your lips, addicted to the way they curved beneath his.

"He'll take credit for this."

He shrugged. "I'm okay with that."

You locked your other arm around his neck, nose brushing his as you eyed his lips. The red stain on his cheeks had your heart skipping as many beats as it could. What you wouldn't give to have a picture of him like this. Stuck in a haze of love that you put him in.

With a stupefied grin, you felt him start to lead you through the next dance. The steps perfectly in tune with his—as it was always meant to be. "So am I."

[altsvu]

Hey lovely, me again! The smut promts with Nick Amaro,

32. Are you jealous & 41 call me that again

Please 🥰

wanted him back

pairing: nick amaro x fem!reader

wc: 898

summary: after stepping away from a sexual relationship with nick, you quickly realize that there were feelings attached from both ends. nick, being the jealous and overprotective type, wants more than what the two of you had.

cw: pining (?), smut (ish), jealousy

a/n: i hope you enjoy as much as i enjoyed writing this!! i kinda think i’m obsessed with a jealous nick amaro, he gives off an assertive personality!!! i also feel like it’s not really smutty as i wanted it to be but the prompts fit well!!i’m sincerely sorry about how long i took to do this 😔

law and order svu masterlist! ✯ taglist!

✯✯✯✯

All this time that you’ve worked with Nick, you never thought you’d end up hooking up with him, being in a sexual relationship with him, catching feelings for him, and ending things with him all while working together.

Crazy right?

The kicker of it all? You still had some lingering feelings for him. You couldn’t help it. He made you feel good the first time you hooked up with him, as well as the other times after that. And the relationship was actually going places beyond a sexual aspect but you don’t really know what happened. Maybe it was the stress of work, or maybe it was the stress of outside factors, but the two of you kind of fell off because of it.

Every time the SVU won a case, a celebratory drink at a bar was called for. However, you would always get a bit bold whenever you had some liquor in you. Nothing crazy, just chatting with guys that would be there when the night winded down. And you were a catch! You took care of yourself and were always put together and that made you beautiful, not only to you but to everyone else. But Nick seemed a bit jealous of that, as he tried to stop you every single time. Before the both of you hooked up, you just figured he was doing it for your protection, but after the fact, you realized it was because he wanted you all to himself.

Now, during this phase the two of you are in now, it had caught your attention that Nick is still being his overprotective self, if not worse.

A detective from Bronx SVU had stopped by the precinct to help with the case the squad was working on and he had stopped at your desk to chat. He was obviously into you but you didn’t entertain it, you just acted as you normally would when talking to guys. He stayed for a bit longer than expected and he even asked to walk him out.

When you walked back to your desk, you felt Nick’s eyes follow. He didn’t say anything when you initially sat down, so you continued doing your work and ignored him. You thought that maybe he didn’t have the energy to fix his mouth to say something about you and the detective but you were wrong.

“He was here for an awfully long time.”

“Nick, are you serious? I genuinely thought you would have kept quiet this one time.”

“It’s a genuine thought.”

“Right, to you.”

“You’ve talked to a lot of guys after we stopped, you know.”

“Are you jealous?”

“Oh wow, of course you’d ask me that.”

“I’m gonna take that as a yes.”

Nick was about to retort something when Liv made her presence known in the bullpen.

“You two having issues?”

“No.” the two of you said collectively.

“Good. I don’t want to hear any more bickering, we have a rapist to catch.”

You smirked at Nick and continued your previous work. He was clearly in his feelings about not getting the last word.

✯✯✯✯

It was much later into the day and you were the only one left. You were actually at your locker getting ready to leave for the night when you heard someone.

“Y/N?”

You turned around to see Nick behind you.

“Nick, what are you doing here? Why did you come back?”

“I left something in my locker.”

Silence filled the locker room.

“I am jealous.”

“What?”

Nick came closer to you. “I’m answering your question. I am jealous. I can’t bear to see you talk to these other guys knowing how I still feel about you after all this time.”

You knew he was jealous but you never thought that there was still lingering feelings. A part of you wanted him back, but you just weren’t sure.

“Nick…”

He stepped even closer to you. “I didn’t want to end things. I still have a lot of feelings for you and I may not have portrayed that in the best way when we ended things.”

The last thing he said was “I’m sorry, Y/N.” There was a bit of comfortable silence after forgiving him. It took you a while to do so though, as you felt like this could have been avoided. Nick’s hands creeped to your waist, pulling you even closer. He kissed you and you kissed him back, and it felt like the best feeling ever. He ended up gripping your ass, something you never expected from him. At least not in the precinct.

The one kiss turned into a full blown makeout session, with hands going to intimate places and soft moans filling the locker room.

“Mi reina sexy.” Nick moaned into your neck. The biggest smile crept up on your face as you loved when Nick gave you nicknames, especially in Spanish. You made him stop in his tracks to look passionately into your eyes.

“Call me that again.” You whispered.

Nick picked you up off the floor, causing you to squeal a little. “Mi reina sexy. That’s exactly what you are to me.”

“Good. I wouldn’t want it to be any other way.”

And with that, another makeout session was initiated, and the two of you spent the rest of the night together, rekindling a love that just so happened to never be lost.

✯✯✯✯

taglist: @storiesofsvu @averyhotchner @ssaic-jareau @lapaquerette

[cloudcountry]

Uh baking an Apple pie with issac? Or issac with a s/o who's a fanfic writer! either one is fine! c:

SUMMARY: Isaac's been working hard lately, so you take Arthur's advice and make him a tasty treat!!

WARNINGS: None!! :D

COMMENTS: i'm trying to get back in the writing groove,,, i havent done it in so long it feels so unfamiliar ^^; thank you for requesting my apple tater!! he's the perfect start :D

this takes place before isaac and mc really know each other??? I TOOK YOUR REQUEST IN A VERY DIFFERENT DIRECTION OOPS. its just artie being a wingman LMAO

Skimming the shelves, you mumble titles to yourself as you search for the cookbook Sebastian recommended to you. You’d offhandedly mentioned making a pie for a certain someone, and the butler was quick to catch onto what you were actually trying to do. After all, said certain someone had been working hard enough to lose valuable sleep, and you weren’t the only one becoming concerned.

Snatching the book off the shelves as soon as you find it, you begin flipping through the pages. You’re so absorbed in the recipes and detailed descriptions of sweet treats that you don’t notice the other presence creeping up behind you.

“Well, I’ll be! Newt is quite a lucky guy!” Arthur hums thoughtfully, nearly scaring you out of your skin.

“Hey! What are you doing here?” you yelp.

Arthur laughs heartily as you fumble with the book, snapping it shut. Your gaze is scornful as you whip around to face him, lips twisted into a pout.

“Aw, I’m sorry love. I didn’t mean to scare you.” he slides up to you, leaning in to get a closer look at the book, “If you want to make something for him, I’d recommend something with apples. Our old Newt loves them dearly!”

Apples? You furrow your brow, running through the list of apple desserts you know. And how did he know it was for Isaac?!

“Oh, and love? Why not make the dessert with him? It’ll drag him away from his work.” Arthur winks, and just like that, he slips out of the kitchen.

That’s how you ended up here, with Isaac at your side. It’d taken quite a bit of convincing to get him out of his room and even more convincing to have him agree to bake an apple pie with you, but somehow you succeeded. You doubt anyone else would have gotten the same result.

Isaac’s soft voice is quite loud in the silence of the kitchen as he reads out ingredients, murmuring under his breath about how he would measure them and doing calculations to make sure the dessert was perfect—

“Woah, hold on Isaac!” you place a hand on the recipe book, pulling it away from his face.

He immediately stops at the sudden contact, pretty eyes blown wide at the sight of you so close to his face.

“This isn’t supposed to be a science experiment! We just need to have fun, okay?” you try your best to smile in a way that will calm him down and help him understand.

Isaac simply looks away and grasps at his hair, twirling the loose strands around his index finger.

“Okay.” he murmurs, and you do a mental celebratory dance.

Operation befriend Isaac is underway!

[buckevantommy]

continuation of this

They're all so caught up in their own heads, a new kind of joy emanating from each of them that they don't seem notice how odd it is. A good thing, yes. But Hen can tell it's not a universal joy; there's three distinct stories here.

Chim clocks her questioning face first but his smile doesn't diminish. He does realise the other two people in the locker room are sporting similar smiles and cocks his head.

Eddie notices Chim's grin next, and they both ask at the same time: "What are you so happy about?"

Buck turns around from his locker, wide grin on his face. "Tommy told me he loves me."

All three heads snap to Buck.

"I did tell him first-- but I wasn't expecting him to say it back. I mean, I was hoping, y'know? And then.."

Buck trails off, face going a little dopey as he gets lost in some recent sweet memory.

Eddie claps a hand on his shoulder and pulls him into a half hug. "That's great, Buck!"

Chim claps him on the shoulder. "Congrats, Buckaroo. I already knew, of course, but I'm glad you guys finally took that step."

Buck's face scrunches in confusion. "Wait, what?"

Eddie nods as he shoves his duffel into his locker. "Yeah, well it's obvious. If we'd taken bets we all would've lost because we thought you guys woulda said it before now."

"That's right," adds Chim, nodding.

Hen rolls her eyes at their antics and pushes her way through to pull Buck into a proper hug. "I'm proud of you."

Buck muffles a shy thanks into her collar.

"And I'm happy for you."

"And for us," Chim butts in. "Tommy's the first partner of yours we all actually like."

Eddie hums an mmhm in agreement, and Hen swats lightly at both of them. "Okay, your turn boys: why the wide smiles?"

Chim and Eddie look to her, then at each other. Chim cocks his head at Eddie again, then brushes a finger under his nose. "You shaved the broom off!"

That's when the rest of them notice the absence of the stache. Relief washes over Hen, because that thing was an eyesore.

"Yes, I did," he lightly shoves at Chim as he tries to get a finger under Eddie's nose. "I, uh. I was done with it, y'know?"

Hen does not know, but good for him.

"Change is good," says Chim, and they all look to him expectantly. He blinks at them. "What?"

"Your turn, doofus," Eddie says.

Chim tries to will away his smile, and Hen knows that look: "You have a secret!"

Buck and Eddie's eyes blow wide.

"Yes, I do, and I will tell you, just-- hey, Cap!" Chim calls as Bobby passes through the bay. Once he joins them at the doorway, Chim continues. "So, as you all may know, our time with Mara expanded our family for a bit, and well. Maddie and I have decided to have a other kid."

The room erupts in surprised cheers and celebratory smiles and hugs. They're halfway through asking questions when he tells them she's already pregnant - and Hen wants to swat him again for burying that lead, but instead she pulls everyone in for a big group hug.

They've all had a rough run recently. It's nice to finally get some good news all around.

[defodisturbed]

Born to Die - Jake Sully x Fem!Na'vi!reader NSFW

(A/N: hey yall I've decided to write for Jake Sully now teehee :33 I inspired this fic from one of my character ai chats with him. hope y'all enjoy!)

Y/N was a mysterious girl. Rarely seen, hardly ever heard. But when she was in her element, she was like no other.

It was a celebratory bonfire, and all of the clan members were dancing and singing. But all that Jake was focusing on was Y/N. He had noticed her a few days ago, but only now had the courage to say anything.

Y/N was dancing so gracefully, eyes closed and feeling herself. She felt a tap on her shoulder, and opened her eyes to see Jake Sully. Toruk Makto. The hero of the Omatikaya clan, and many others.

"Hey, how are you? Feeling good tonight?" Y/N asked, trying to keep her cool. Jake chuckled and replied as he took a drink from his cup. "Yeah, I'm feeling amazing. You?"

"I'm feeling awesome!" Y/N laughed, truly enjoying herself for once. Jake put his hands on her waist and trailed them down to her ass, softly groping her.

"You wanna come back to my place? Have some fun, hm?" Jake offered as he danced to the music with her. Y/N smiled and nodded. "I'd love to."

Jake took her hand and led her off from the bonfire to his hut.

When they got there, Y/N admired all of the beautiful decorations and items he owned. She couldn't believe how people could live like this. She had been homeless for years, since her family passed in a tragic turn of events.

"What, have you never seen interior decorating?" Jake chuckled. Truly, she didn't. Sure, she had a real home for some time. But even then, things were tough. Nothing was ever handed to her on a silver platter. Nothing was ever handed to her, period.

"So, why did you bring me here?" Y/N turned to Jake, putting her hand on his chest. Jake gave a low, deep, almost seductive chuckle as he gave his answer.

"I was thinking we could... have some fun. Mess around a bit, how does that sound?" He said, groping her body. Y/N giggled as she nuzzled into his neck. She wanted to be intimate with someone she actually liked. Someone she actually wanted to be intimate with.

"I would like that very much... but why me, of all people? You could have any woman or man on Pandora but you chose me?" Y/N asked, not understanding his motives. Sure, he might have been feeling a little bit frisky that night, but he could've picked anyone at the bonfire to take back to his place. He hadn't even noticed her until a few days before. The glimmer in her eyes, though. It had caught him by surprise the first time it blinded him. It reminded him of the lens flares he saw in films, especially the action and adventure ones.

"I don't want anyone but you. I've had my eye on you for a while, now. Now, let's get it done, shall we?" Jake rumbled in a sexy, captivating voice. Y/N felt enamored by him, wanting so desperately to be with him. Not just for sex, but for love. For passion and appreciation for one another.

Jake grasped her beaded top, and asked, "Can I take this off?"

Y/N was stunned. Had he just... asked?

"Y-yes.. yes, please." she replied, voice wavering with such adoration. Jake gently took her top off, setting it on the table beside them. He moved down toward her waist, again taking her clothes in his hands and asking for permission to undress her. A simple 'yes' and he got to work. Though he wasn't like the others. He took great care in preserving the clothing of his partners, especially since Y/N's was so delicate and tediously crafted.

Y/N felt exposed, especially since Jake still had his loincloth on. She tried to cover herself, but Jake whispered in a comforting voice, "You don't have to hide yourself from me, my love."

Jake undressed himself, exposing himself so as to help Y/N feel more comfortable. Y/N slowly took her hands from her body, trying to overcome her fears.

"It's okay, you don't have to be scared." Jake encouraged, hoping to comfort her and help her to feel more secure and safe with him. "I'm just nervous.."

"It's okay to be nervous. I'll guide you." Jake answered. He laid her down on the bed and kissed her deeply. He started to ease his cock out of its sheath, causing Y/N's eyes to grow wider and wider with each inch. After it was all out, she asked, "Is that.. all.. going to go inside of me?"

"As much as you want it to. Or, if you're feeling brave, as much as you can fit." Jake responded, very much in the mood.

"I want it all. I want all of it, Jake. Give it to me." Y/N pleaded, kissing him on the cheek. Jake took his cock in his hand and gathered some of the slick pooling in her hot core.

He then started to slide into her entrance, groaning with every new inch taken. Soon enough, he bottomed out. "How do you feel?" he asked. Y/N paused, thinking. "I feel... good. I feel really, really good. Fuck me, Jake. Fuck me like it's the last time you ever will."

"Really? I didn't take you for a girl who likes it rough. But I'll still give you want you want. Prepare yourself for the night of your life."

Jake then started with a fast but soft pace, and it eventually became fast and hard.

Y/N was very vocal, screaming and moaning with every breath she got. She screamed his name, relishing in the feeling. The bed creaked with every movement.

"Fuck.. fuck, you feel so good.. so tight and warm, fuck! I'm gonna cum.. oh, god, I'm gonna cum!" Jake exclaimed, getting sloppier with his thrusts. Not staying in one rhythm. Always changing how hard he went. He knew it was embarrassing to finish so quickly, but she had such a feeling that was like no other. She could milk him dry and he would still want more.

"Cum in me, Jake! Please, I want it so bad! Give it to me, Jake!" Y/N screamed, eventually coming to her peak. She squirted all over his cock, painting him with her pleasure. Jake then followed with his own orgasm, coating her insides with white.

They paused, taking a moment to breathe and come down from their highs. After a few seconds, Jake laid himself down beside Y/N.

"Did you enjoy it?" he asked. Y/N looked at him, still breathing heavily. "I... I loved it. I really loved it." she answered, chuckling a little bit in disbelief. She had never felt anything like this before, and never thought she could.

"Really? I'll take that as a compliment then." Jake laughed. There was a short pause, until Y/N asked a question. A simple one, really, but it took him by surprise.

"Do you have your eye on anybody? Like, a potential mate?"

There was a pause.

"I do, actually."

Y/N's face visibly dropped. "Who?"

Jake smiled and caressed her cheek. "You."

"M-me? But why? You, such an attractive man, could have anybody in the world! It'd be stupid to choose someone as myself. I am of no use to you. I have no status in the clan other than the weird girl."

Jake snickered. "I don't want anybody but you. Nobody else has caught my eye in years. You... you're special. I love you."

Once again, there was a pause. But this time, there was tension. Only a twinge, but it was still there.

"You... love me?" Y/N confirmed, not wanting to believe she had someone who genuinely loved her. In all of her years of living, she was spared no unnecessary glimpses. People avoided her at all costs, not wanting to be seen in a 100 foot radius of her.

"I do. I truly, truly do. I've loved you for a while, now. I want to be mated for life. Have kids, grow old together. I want to be with you for the rest of my life." Jake replied, not telling a crumb of a lie. Y/N stared at him in wonder, amazed at how truthful his words were. His body language told her he was telling the truth. The complete, utter, raw truth.

"I would love to spend the rest of my life with you, too. I must tell you, I've been watching you for a while. Like... in the trees. Some people would say it's called stalking, but I think it's just distanced fascination. I've seen you doing and feeling all sorts of things. Eating, drinking, hunting, sleeping. Anything you could think of. I've even seen you masturbate a couple of times.."

Jake's cheeks turned purple with blush, thinking of all of the things he did or said while in such a state of arousal. Had he been watched the entire time?

"You are very attractive when you touch yourself. You say things, sometimes. You fantasize about me. When you cum, you think of me. You think of the way I'd touch you. The way I'd make you feel."

The blush was growing more intense as he recalled everything he had said and everything he had acted on.

"I'd love to help you live out some of your fantasies, you know. I have quite an open mind." Y/N lightly chuckled. Jake was surprised. "Well, I think we can save all of those for another time. I'd like to just... talk. Where did you learn to dance like that?"

Y/N laughed, as she thought of how much she danced when no one was watching. "I love to dance. It's my favorite thing to do. I also love music. A human friend of mine has given me a lot of music over the years. I dance to it every day, and I guess I've just picked some stuff up and taught myself. Sometimes I just dance with the wind. Whatever my body wants to do, how it wants to express itself."

Jake listened to her words with such great care. Analyzing every syllable. Every image that sprouted in his head with what she described, it was all so beautiful. He imagined an angel elegantly dancing, the glow of the sunset shining behind her.

"You taught yourself? That's incredible." He replied, eyes glimmering with interest and wonder.

They continued talking until they both fell asleep, and they slept like babies.

[Time skip 5 weeks]

Y/N and Jake had been dating for several weeks, and Jake had fallen in absolute love. He decided it was time. They were in the hut, as Y/N made new art for the door. She wanted to make a piece that made people feel 'invited' and 'welcomed.'

"Y/N, I want to ask you something." Jake said, walking into the hut and sitting next to her. "Ah, welcome home, Jake. I have missed you. What is it you would like to ask?"

"I want to ask if... you want to be mated for life. I would like to marry you. I want you to be mine forever."

Y/N stopped. She slowly turned to him, eyes widened. "You... want to be mated for life? Oh, Jake. I have been waiting for you to ask me that for a very long time. I would love to be your mate. I would love to have kids, grow old together, and be together in every new life." Y/N squealed, hugging him tightly.

Jake had finally found his home.

MWAH hope y'all enjoyed this one!! first time writing an actual fic for Jake. lmk if I should do more, and definitely lmk what i can do to improve my smut-writing skills.

@dyingofcookies

[lamnwar]

Hii! I really love your stories and writing style and since i saw your requests are open, I'd love to request a NSFW with Akashi where it's both, his and reader's first time, with lots of fluff if possible and if you want!!

If you decide to write it, thank you in advance! <3

Omgggg can't believe it took me 6 months to complete this request I swear I momentarily forgot how to write smut 😭😭 hope you still enjoy this though, I felt bad so this one is extra long (4.7k) <33

You're My First // Akashi Seijurō x Fem! Reader

MDNI 18+

Context: Might have taken you and your boyfriend Seijurō way too long to finally have sex, whoops! All characters are aged-up (18+) for plot purposes.

Warnings: mainly fluff till the last quarter, mention of reader (and Akashi a bit) being sexually frustrated, mention of masturbation (both Akashi and reader do it), kissing obvs, handjob, fingering, protected sex (because Akashi is a gentleman 🥰)

The wooden tile strategically placed on the board, Seijurō's game partner sighs. It's a force of habit: can you ever win against a guy like him? You chuckle, arms wrapping around your boyfriend's shoulders as you kiss his cheek.

“What is it that you say? Your victory is absolute?” you whisper loud enough for Shintarō to hear you.

“Please, no need to add more to my defeat” the green haired man readjusts his glasses, seemingly unbothered by his loss but you aren't dupe.

A smile on your lips, you let your fingers run through Seijurō's red hair. His shogi playmate looks away, like all the times you show some sort of affection to your boyfriend. Throwing his jacket over his broad shoulders, Midorima excuses himself by saying that he's got practice. It figures, you think, Seijurō's friends are players like no other. You wave him goodbye as he walks out, and once his tall figure is out of sight, you let out a soft sigh.

“Sei?”

He looks up from the board with a softness in his gaze, putting the tiles back in their designated bag. Akashi Seijurō conceits his emotions quite well, that's a well-known fact. But the minute he fell in love with you, he's learned to open up. From talking about his mother to how basketball saved him from his darkest times, the Seijurō you know is exclusive – no one, not even Midorima that he's fond of, has any knowledge of the depth of his person. But you don't bother: he's your one and only, isn't he?

“Coming to my place tonight?” He asks.

You breathe in, like every time he asks. Most of the time, there is no meaning to these words. Nights of shy touches, nights of "sorry love, I can't". You ponder if you should refuse. You have needs, don't you? Of course you do. More than touch-starved, you crave love to a level that you feel Seijurō is not ready for.

“Sure thing” you utter, incapable of turning him down.

A light brings his eyes to life, and you feel your heart melt.

Isn't he sweet, your Sei-chan?

A thought you never believed you’d ever had, on the day you met him; an afternoon in May, both of you finding yourself in the same isle of the library, looking for the same book.

“It's in my recommended reading list” you said, not willing to back down.

“Funny, my professor wrote this one.”

His arrogance turned you off, but then, he organized a special lecture for your class with the author of said book, leaving your own lecturer in awe and you wondering why he did such thing for someone who meant nothing. Took you long enough to realize that you actually meant something to him. He asked you out right after that lecture and now here you are.

“Sei, let me treat you. We’re having celebratory diner for your victory in shogi” You stretch out of your spot, hands swaying to your hips as you smile to your boyfriend.

“My love, if we have a celebratory diner every time I win, you’ll end up broke.”

You scoff, nudging him in the arm. His arrogance ever so often pops out, but in a rather endearing way. In the right settings, you find yourself thinking, it might even be attractive – but you guard yourself from admitting so.

“We’re eating to my place instead” he says as his arm finds your shoulders, wrapping around it with the grace that could only be associated to him.

You raise an eyebrow but doesn’t refuse the invitation. The last rays of sun cast on your faces as you both walk in the late summer evening, between the distant laughter of children and the sounds of birds going home. And amidst all of what soothes your soul, nothing compares to the way you feel at this exact moment, walking so close to the one you love. It’s a subtle feeling, one that you don’t bother to describe, that makes things so easy when he’s around. And you just need to glance for a second in his direction, to see it. The way he makes you feel, written all over your face.

Seijurō is silent, yet, from the dancing flame in his eyes, you can guess that something is brewing in his head. You smile, a soft chuckle coming out of your lips. You know he hates it, when you’re able to read him so easily; he told you once, “I’ve always thought of myself as hard to decipher”. Not so much though, or at least, not to you.

“Sei, you seem nervous despite having an awfully good day.”

Your remark gets him to straighten up as he walks, a quick raise of his eyebrows indicating that you took him by surprise.

“Can’t a guy be nervous around his girlfriend?”

“My…” you chuckle, “don’t put it on me now. What’s up? It’s not the first time I’m coming over, although I’d argue it’s not a common occurrence.”

“Well, you know – “

“You might do things you'll regret if I come by too often, I know” you cut him off.

You both stay silent for a minute; your words having brought up the memories of countless of discussions around this topic. Seijurō has never outrightly told you why he barely has you over, why he cuts your dates short when things start to escalate, why every time you take the level of intimacy up a notch, he is the first one to grow distance between you. It’s always some vague excuse that you don’t really understand, but you try your best not to judge. Intimacy, after all, is not a given to everybody.

“But you know, I don’t think I’ll regret anything I do with you.” You say, cutting short to the long silence. “I mean, as long as it’s you and that… you know. I just wanna say, I trust you with these things. I wouldn’t be with you overwise.”

You quickly glance in his direction, in search of a reaction from your boyfriend. You don’t know if your words are clear enough to him – not that it’s been your kind (or his kind) to be straightforward. Yet, you still manage to get yourself to be understood, despite never saying things outright. So you just hope that he’s got the message clear; and he does, you figure, by the small nod he gives as you approach his place.

“I’ll treat you to a lovely diner tonight, then. And if you don’t mind, you can spend the night.”

You stare at him, incredulous. Have you heard that last part right? Seijurō always speaks with assurance, but these aren’t words he’s used to speak.

“Oh, y-yeah…” you clean your throat, hand clumsily trying to hide your blush.

This is a turn of situations you haven’t expected whatsoever, but as you walk into the familiar lobby of Seijurō’s place, you realize soon enough that this is real. Unusual, but real.

And then it hits you.

The reason he seems nervous, the reason he’s invited you over in the first place, and why he’s asked you to stay over from the start. It comes clear, especially knowing him. The young man has always been one to plan things out, especially important things. And if you read the situation correctly, tonight is not born out of nothing.

Maybe he’s finally taken notice of the small clues you’ve left, traces of your desire for more. The way your hands linger longer on his body when you touch him, the sweet perfume you wear on your neck in hope whiffs draw him in, the elongated looks you’ve sent him for weeks now. Sweet, innocent eyes, yet eyes ready for more, if he’s only willing to give you an opportunity.

And willing, to your surprise, he is. Something feels different when you walk the threshold of his place; it’s not the soft smell of lavender you’ve grown familiar with, it’s not the warm shade of the light, it’s not the way he hangs his jacket on the hanger at the door. So, what is it?

“Love, are you coming?” His voice brings you out of your thoughts.

You breathe out a short “yes”, joining him in the kitchen. Your gaze fall upon the rolled-up sleeves of his shirt, as he rinses vegetables for diner. The way he moves with grace and confidence while you’re still trying to process what this whole night means stuns you, and you sit, in contemplation of whether you should address the subject.

How are you supposed to ask your boyfriend if you’re having sex for the first time tonight, anyways?

You contemplate, ultimately concluding that being direct is the best way to go about it. Well, that is, if you even know how to be direct in the way you address the subject. So you stand, looming over his shoulders as he stirs some onion and garlic in the pan, shy hands locking behind your back. He hums, an assured smile creeping on his lips as he feels your presence in his back. He’s seemingly way more relaxed about this night than you are – but then again, Seijurō is the last person on Earth to show any sign of nervousness. His hand reaches back to you, gently dragging your face closer to land a kiss on your forehead.

“What’s that, love? Are you the nervous one, now?”

He chuckles as you stare at him, baffled. Are you doing such a terrible job at hiding it?

“Can’t tell me you’re all chill about tonight either” you retaliate.

“Oh, but I am.”

“When did you decide to make tonight the night, anyway?”

He turns off the stove, flipping the veggies one last time.

“I had that idea in mind for a while, but I wanted to make sure that you wanted it as well” he replies honestly, “so when you said that you trusted me earlier, I had all the confirmation that I needed.”

You nod, sitting on the counter.

“And you’re really gonna make me think you’re not nervous at all about it?” you cock an eyebrow.

His silence leaves you uncertain – something that annoys you ever so often. Your ability to read him better than anyone else has always been your pride, so these moments where he strips you from your special ability to comprehend him always annoys you.

“Seijurō.”

He looks up in your direction, his eyes open slightly as he hears your tone. It’s not cold, or mean, or stern. But it’s serious, well serious beyond what he’s used to hear from you. He sighs, joining you as his pinkie finger gently grazes your hand.

“If you don’t want to, we don’t have to do it.” He sighs. “Maybe we should have talked about it before…”

“It’s fine. If we did, it would have ruined the mood.”

“Because there’s a mood to ruin to begin with?”

You chuckle, finger interlocking with his.

“Oh, I’m crazy nervous, but it doesn't make me any less… eager than I’ve always been.”

He raises an eyebrow, slight amusement on his face. You can’t help but chuckle a bit at his expression. Suddenly, seeing him smile so wholeheartedly makes (most) of your nerves go away. Maybe that’s what he does to you, and maybe that’s why you stick around. You let out a soft giggle, before looking at him.

“Anyways. Do you have any idea how the night where you lose your virginity typically goes?”

“I was relying on you to have an answer on that.”

You scoff, a heartfelt laugh coming out of your throat. The sight of you like that makes the blood pump to his face; a light pink blush painting his cheek as he laughs too. He doesn’t even know what gets you to laugh like that – head thrown back as the little crinkles by your eyes that he loves so much appears, but it warms his heart like nothing else can.

“Damn, we’re two big virgins, aren’t we?” you say as you sigh dramatically.

“For some reason, I imagined that you would have been more knowledgeable than me on that topic.”

“Seijurō, who do you think I am?!”

He chuckles; a slightly high-pitched sound that rarely comes out of him unless he’s with you. Because this is what you do to him, letting his true nature shine through from time to time – whether it be his radiant smile, the pink on his cheeks every time he’s near you, or the kindness of his amber eyes.

“Well… you know I’m not one to half-ass anything, but it’s not the easiest thing to do some studying on.”

“I see.” You nod, fingers interlocking with his. “But we trust each other, don’t we?”

He hums, looking at you. And that’s when you see it in his eyes, that glimmer that tells you without stuttering that he is absolutely sure about this, you and him, but mostly you.

“Can’t go wrong if it’s us, yeah?”

His words travel in your mind as he slowly leans towards you. His thumb caresses the soft skin of your bottom lip, before he leaves a sweet and soft kiss on it. It feels almost nostalgic, a kiss similar to the one you first exchanged when you just started dating. The warmth in your heart and the gentleness of his fingers on your skin, all reminiscent of the kisses you experienced when you were falling for him. And now that you have fell, the idea of feeling these kisses all over again makes your heart beat frenetically. You kiss him once again, your hand resting on the soft skin of his cheeks as you pour your love in that single kiss. He pulls away, hot breath falling on your lips as his eyes capture you, forbidding you to look anywhere else.

“Is it crazy if I tell you I am absolutely sure about this, in this very instant?” he mutters against your lips.

You hum, shaking your head. It’s not crazy, the thought has crossed your mind, too. And maybe that’s a sign; for the little that you know on the topic, overthinking things usually isn’t the way to go. It’s more one of these “if you know, you know” moments.

And right now, this is it.

Just one look, and he grabs your hand, taking you both to the bedroom – not before covering up the sautéed veggies he’s cooked earlier, of course (Seijurō, even in desperate need for you, wouldn’t leave freshly made food uncovered). You giggle, body lying on the soft mattress of his bed; bed that you’ve shared multiple times without ever crossing the line.  And here you are, fingers tangling in his soft, red locks, too lost in a haze of desire to think of the hardship it has been all along to not act on your needs for him, for his touch.

“Sei, I want you, you know that?”

“You made it quite clear, yeah” he blushes softly as a sweet laugh comes out of his lips. “And I know it’s not very gentleman-like of me to say it, but baby, if I could, I would strip you naked right away.”

“Do it then, who’s stopping you?”

He raises an eyebrow, pink painting his cheek as he sees the daring look in your eyes.

“My... I’m no savage, I had to make sure you wanted me to.”

You laugh, leaving a sweet kiss on his jaw.

“Baby, I’ve got years of pent-up sexual frustration about to get unleashed. Please, do not be a gentleman with me tonight.”

He looks at you curiously, not expecting his sweet girlfriend to utter such words. Yet he feels his cock twitch in the confine of his pants when he hears you speak like that. Something about your tone – so clear and confident, with a hint of need, makes the blood rush down to his aching member. The one he used to stroke once you were gone from his place, mad at himself that he didn’t gather the strength to touch you despite knowing that it was what you both wanted; and he found himself angry at himself and in desperate need for you, stroking his dick shamefully as he thought of you.

But here you are, under his body, your tongue leaving the sweet taste of you in his mouth as you push him as close to you as possible.

He pulls away, heavy breath fanning on your hot skin. It’s almost by instinct that he lets his hand trail down to the hem of your shirt, tugging on it as if to ask if he can remove it from you. And he does when you give him a nod, loving eyes examining all parcels of skin that gets unveiled before him. He’s delicate and meticulous, removing piece by piece with so much regard for the fabric that you’re almost tempted to tell him to just rip it off. He has always had that theory about you – one that he finally gets to confirm.

You are, indeed, a piece of art.

The beauty of your skin, the marks, moles and scars, the curves and angles. All so perfectly mixed like you were created by an artist and no less. He stops for a minute, wondering: does he have any right to touch something so immaculate?

But you’re quick to give him an answer, when your hands remove his shirt, letting you get a sight at his body. Seijurō is surprising. His build is slender, delicate; but when your fingers trace the outline of his muscles, it becomes clear that he is more than he appears to be. Not that you’ve ever been curious about his body either. One thing that you’ve always liked about your boyfriend, is his face. His features are soaked in grace, always having the look of a prince in all situations – even in the morning when he’s just wakened up, or after practice when he’s sweaty. He’s got that same look, over and over, that makes you believe you must have done something great in your past life to find yourself someone like him in this one.

“Sei, I wanna touch you, can I?”

He smiles softly. Your request is sweet, almost innocent. He can’t say no, he doesn’t want to.

“Be nice, yeah?” He leaves a peck on your cheek.

You giggle – who would have guessed that he’d make you feel like a silly teenage girl in love right now? Your hand trails down his body, meticulously exposing his skin. It’s soft and warm, and now you understand why his hugs always feel so good. Your movements slow down when you reach his belt, eyes widening slightly at the sigh of the bulge in his pants. It’s not the first time that you see it – you’ve noticed it in the previous nights you had a sleepover – but this time, you ought to do something about it.

“Ah – oh my…” his breath hitches in his throat as your fingers reach inside his pants, pulling the fabric down to unleash his cock.

It’s a bold move on your part, one that gets you to blush furiously once you see his erected member before your eyes. It’s pretty, you think, much more than you expected it to be. A delicate curve that leads to a blush pink tip – sensitive, you notice as your finger curiously brushes over it. You explore, hand wrapping around his length as you give him gentle caresses.

“Is that good, Sei?”

“Amazing, love… please don’t stop.”

You hum, letting your fingers translate your curiosity by the way they explore every inch of skin you find, watching him shiver when you touch some places, sigh when you touch others. So… this is it, you think, a man’s pleasure. You continue, watching him twitch in your hold. You look up at him, sparkles in your eyes.

“Sei, do you love my touch?”

His fingers run through your locks, a soft smile on his face.

“I have to, it comes from you.”

Pulling you up to pepper your face in kisses, you can almost cry. It's never hit you before, how much your boyfriend actually loves you. But you can’t deny that look in his eyes – love and lust painting his irises like night lights.

Beautiful, like him.

Enchanting, like him.

Loving, like him.

“Sweetheart” his voice falls in your ear in a soft murmur, “I’ll need you to stop fiddling with my cock with those soft fingers of yours or I won’t be able to contain myself anymore.”

“Oh… Oh!” you blush, pulling your hands away. “Got carried away. A man’s anatomy is a curious thing” you remark.

He raises an eyebrow, laying you down on the mattress.

“I could say the same thing about a woman’s body, particularly yours…” he taunts, thumb tracing down your throat to your perky nipple.

You hiss, surprised look at the way he touches you like a scientist making a new discovery. His touch is exploring. He rolls the sensitive bud between his fingers, observing the way your body folds in response.

“Sei! Ah… sensitive!”

“I know.”

You ogle at him, only getting him to laugh with a bit of mischief in his voice. And you get reminded at this moment that this is who he is. Seijurō is a learner, getting his kick in mastering new skills. And for a man that has never done it before, he is surprisingly skilled in touching your body. As his lips trail down your abdomen to your navel, you hold your breath. On the moment, countless thoughts cross your mind. Did you shave this morning? What if he finds out about this one mole on your pubis and freaks out? Doesn’t it look a bit weird down there?

“Good lord…”

Fuck.

You panic even more upon hearing his exclamation; what does it mean?!

“My love, are all vulvas like yours? Because it looks so pretty…”

“Huh?”

You’re stunned, speechless. It isn’t quite the compliment you could ever wish for. To be honest, you’ve been too scared to take a proper look at your own cunt before, so all the sense you have of it comes from what you’ve gathered from your touch. You’re familiar with the ridges, soft bulging parts and folds, but what has always been mere anatomy to you, seems to be art in Seijurō’s eyes. His curious finger runs through your slit, separating the lips as you blush furiously. His movements are teasing – you wonder if he’s doing it purposely or is it just a mishap of his exploring. Either way, you bite back your whimpers, watching him brush against your clitoris softly, while you squirm.

“Sei that’s uh…”

“Here? You want my touch here, love?”

You nod eagerly, observing the way he looks at you from between your legs, finger gently circling around your clit. Your hips buck forward, setting a rhythm to which he adapts his moves.

“You’re getting wet… do you mind if I put a finger in?”

“Please!”

You quickly cover your mouth, surprised by how needy you sounded just now. Such tone has never gotten out of you; except late at night, in the solitude of your room when you’d think of him, frustrated fingers toying with your clit as you would almost cry thinking about how much you craved Seijurō’s touch. But now that you have it, it’s a different thing. It’s much more intense, like your skin is a fragile flame, and his touch is fuel. He pours, your flame grows, and grows, and grows.

“Fuck… I…” You pant, far from expecting his fingers to know your cunt so well – isn’t that supposed to be his first time, too?!

“Everything’s alright?” he asks between two kisses on your inner thighs.

Your lips tremble, one arm pressed against your forehead while your other hand holds the bed sheets like your life depends on it.

“I think I’m close” you finally manage to say.

“Want me to stop?”

“…” you think for a moment, too overwhelmed to have an idea of what you truly want – but you do give reason to your body, eventually, “Don’t stop.”

He leaves a sweet peck on the skin of your thigh, working his fingers till you squirm, your warm walls pushing him out as you reach your orgasm – first one that he’s brought you to. He props his body up to kiss you with all the love he has for you, and you pull him close, goosebumps covering your skin when you feel his naked body against yours. He’s so soft, so loving, it can almost make you cry.

He’s just… love. That’s what he is, the embodiment of love.

“Baby, should we go all the way?”

You nod, kissing him again, and again, drunk on him.

“Please say it with your sweet voice” he murmurs against your lips.

“Seijurō, please make love to me.”

He nods, the tenderness in his eyes giving you the kind of warmth you’ve always craved. It stays, even when he gets up to get a condom, and even when he stands before you, hard-on in his palm as he rolls the rubber on it. You look with stars in your eyes when he hovers above you, leaving a peck on your forehead.

“I’m going in, alright?”

“Yeah” you breathe out.

Your nervous, trying to distract yourself of the stinging feeling when his head pushes in, so you look at his face. His half-lidded eyes, his parted lips as his hot breath fans on your face, and the contraction of his shoulders as his hold himself above you.

“Are you good, sweetheart?”

You shake your head, feeling tears coming up. You can’t tell if you’re just overwhelmed or if it’s that novel pain you feel in that part of your body. Seijurō’s furrow his eyebrows in concern, stilling as he looks at you.

“Shall I stop?”

“Let’s… don’t move. I wanna get used to it.”

“Sure?”

You nod, take big breaths to calm yourself down. Leaving kisses after kisses on your forehead, you feel yourself relax a bit, eventually giving him the thumbs-up to push deeper. And he does, slowly, carefully, like your pussy is the most precious place in the world and that he, a mere mortal, should only thread carefully around it.

“Here you go” he coos “taking me so well…”

You mewl, hands wrapped around his neck, as he starts his slow thrusts. You wonder for a minute if he’s pacing himself as to be careful, or because he’s afraid of not being able to hold himself back overwise. Either way, you slowly find pleasure in the feeling of his cock roaming inside your walls – in and out, deep and slow. Seijurō’s soft grunts falls in your ear, making you shiver.

“You feel… ah… so good, love” his voice is slightly more high-pitched, hints of desperation tinting his timbre.

“Please, faster…”

“Is that what you want, hm?”

“Yeah” you moan out as your hips buck to meet the movements of his.

He pants, the look in his eyes being something you’ve never seen before. It’s not something you can comprehend, but seeing that light danse in his amber irises, combined with his slender finger toying with your clit, you feel your high build up. And explosion of sensations, taking your entire soul to another dimension as you squeal his name, holding on to him like he’s your saviour.

“Fuck, I…”

You giggle in surprise, not ever recalling hearing him swear before. But can he be blamed, when the tight hold your pussy has on him is just so heavenly?

“I’m… love, I’m cumming!”

Those words alone send you into a frenzy, the song of both your moans filling up the room, the same way his hot seed fills up the condom, seconds before he gives out, head falling on your chest.

“I love you” you whisper, just a bit louder than the erratic beat of your hearts.

He looks up at you, incapable of voicing an answer, but you’ve known Seijurō’s face well enough to read his thoughts.

You’re his biggest victory, he believes, being here in this bed, closer to you than he’s ever been before.

[irradiatedsnakes]

btw in the tmagp launch celebratory stream alice's voice actor said her favorite scene that'd been recorded by that point was "alice and sam go to a place". so i suppose we'll be getting that next week :]

other notes. this statement (hey! actually a statement this time! what the fuck) was SOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

the cursed dice angle is so good, the way the statement giver took on that role (roll), played the part, UGH it's so fun. the theme of choice that was brought up is also so good- just. ONE more roll for old time's sake :) especially given that this is a TMI statement and how HUGE IMPORTANT of a theme choice and free will were in tma, felt very fitting. fantastic, loved that.

continuing on my stuff about the entities in tmagp- once again some things here feel very on the nose, particularly the statement giver literally calling himself a mysterious stranger. this feels like a fun little red herring to me, for people a bit hung up on the entities stuff. that's how i interpreted it, anyways. i wanna know more about this world so fucking bad, dude.

also, the institute's in manchester in tmagp, not chelsea/london. which means no milbank prison, no panopticon. interesting. (though soemthing that was known from the arg already- i really need to deep dive on that. tomorrow, maybe.) statement taking and artifact storage are still a thing, evidently, but noting that there's no mention of an archivist or anything like that. and the subject/agent/catalyst stuff, that's Very interesting.

once again, chester bringing up a magnus-related statement, here in obvious reply to what sam was talking about- just when he was considering to celia about dropping his investigations- clearly (imo) to goad him into not leaving it behind. excellent. and fun given the first TMI-related incident with redcanary had the obvious conclusion of THE MAGNUS INSTITUTE IS WEIRD AND DANGEROUS while also having enough mystery to draw sam in further. sam's seen the canary die in the coalmine and has made the decision to keep digging and that's fantastic.

now! characters! sam's paperwork :) VERY intriguing that he's getting all this stuff and celia's got none of it- he said it was due to that box about the response department, but i've got my doubts about that being the reason he's being saddled with all this weird stuff. also the questions on the thing made me laugh, very good. sam and celia have such good interactions, i love how they bounce off each other. also, with regards to the paperwork- i think there's a connection to be made about the statement giver's continued rolling of the dice (it always felt like my choice.) and sam filling out all this creepy, utterly pointless paperwork to "refuse to give it the satisfaction of giving up".

GWEN AND LENA. nigel dickerson, you know, from tv? possibly. i don't watch television. i do hope we'll be seeing exactly what gwen is being told to do next episode.. delivering something, keeping calm, recording the detailed reactions to what's being delivered. maybe we'll get a bit more of a clue as to what the oair is actually for. i do like that gwen's not become one bit less indignant, skeptical, and disrespectful towards lena now that she's got this job. i'm very excited to see her on her fist job she's gonna suck at it i think

i'll admit i was a little surprised to see teddy again. i was worried for a sec he might be going in the direction of getting dragged back to the oair, but nah. not yet, at least :) and ALICE. ALIIIIICE auaaaaagh!!! i don't know if i have much to say baout this part that isn't just (shaking a plushie in my mouth like a dog). very neat that she has agreed to help sam investigate this and actually go to the institute when she's been so staunchly don't get caught up in the creepy stuff! leave the magnus institute stuff ALONE you don't want to get into this spooky shit! like.. she does not want to get involved with spooky shit and she doesn't want sam to get involved with spooky shit but she cares about him and their friendship a lot and this is obviously important to him. so. (plus, the thing about alice's brother having been at the institute alongside sam and gerry..) i like them both so much. i am so excited for next weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek

[theinternetisaweboflies]

Jägermeister

Chapter One: Celebration

“Your leg is killing us,” grumbled Newt. 

“Well, pardon me for attempting to make haste.” Hermann rolled his eyes, which was particularly effective with the subconjunctival hemorrhaging. “It was merely the fate of the world at stake.”

Newt was pretty sure Hermann hadn’t been this sarcastic before the drift.

They were still in LOCCENT, because moving sounded like a lot of work, and they were officially off the clock.

The clock had stopped.

Newt knew one of them didn’t quite believe it yet, but he couldn’t tell if it was him or Hermann. 

Hermann had collapsed in a nearby office chair after its owner vacated it in favor of joining the celebration that was spreading through the Shatterdome like a particularly noisy strain of flu. 

Newt had been saving two bottles of alcohol for the end of the end of the world. They’d been stashed in the lab for five years, ever since he first got to Hong Kong and could take advantage of its open port. One was a bottle of blue Curaçao. The other was Jägermeister.

Newt had always wondered what public affairs person decided Jaeger would be the perfect name for their military-grade Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, when it was already sort of taken by a fairly infamous brand of German liquor, but it was kind of like when Coronavirus hit and nobody stopped drinking Corona. There were much bigger things to worry about. 

Jägermeister was German for 'Master Hunter,' a title originally reserved for officials in positions related to game keeping and hunting. Newt seemed to have a stronger grasp on German history than he had before the drift, so he now knew that Hermann Göring had been a Reichsjägermeister, which was just patently fucking unfair. 

If any Hermann ever deserved the title ‘Jaeger Master of the Realm', it was Hermann Gottleib. 

Now they wouldn’t even get to drink their celebratory toast. Even Newt knew better than to mix alcohol with neural overload.

Some rockstar he turned out to be. Here he was, at the biggest party the human race would probably ever throw, and he was going to bed both early and sober. 

At least, Newt hoped he was going to bed early. Even his hair hurt. Though not as much as Hermann’s leg. 

“I still can't believe it’s the year 2025 and we had to deliver that message in person,” he said. “I mean, how could you have forgotten your phone?”

Hermann huffed and puffed for a moment before saying, “You didn’t have your phone either!”

“As usual, Hermann, you are wrong. I did have my phone. It was just in several pieces. Why? Did you try calling me or something?" Before Hermann could respond, Newt added, “How weird was it that the chopper’s radio didn’t work either? I mean, it was fine when you flew out to the bone slums, right?”

Hermann gave a tired hum of affirmation. “Murphy's Law?”

Maybe Leatherback had a baby too. Maybe it let off a tiny localized blast of organic EMP that took out the radio in a single PPDC helicopter. 

Maybe Newt needed to go to bed.

“I thought you said Murphy’s Law was unscientific compared to… What was it called? The English Flatulence Formula?”

Hermann bristled. “You know perfectly well it is called the British Gas Formula, because the work was commissioned by British-”

Newt interrupted Hermann before he could blow a blood vessel in his other eye. “Yeah, yeah, but you've got to admit it was kind of cool getting to storm into LOCCENT and save the day.”

Hermann smiled suddenly. It was a little bit blinding, even through a cracked lens. “Did you actually call Hercules Hansen a fascist, or was I hallucinating?”

“Oh, shit,” Newt groaned. “I should probably apologize for that. I was sort of worked up, and he looks a lot like your dad did back in the 90s when he thought he could pull off a beard.”

Hermann's smile grew, impossibly, wider. “You were calling my father a fascist?”

“Look, the drift was a lot, alright? I mean, the first one was too, but in a completely different way. I- You know their minds don't work like ours. It did nothing to prepare me for a drift with another human being. Your mind-”

Newt cut himself off. He wasn't breathing but he was babbling, which should have been biologically impossible. 

He sat down on the floor, leaning against the console where Hermann was seated. Someone rushing past them with a bottle of actual champagne accidentally stepped on his leg a little bit, but Newt was too tired to mind much. It wasn’t even the first time he had been stepped on that day. 

The console was cold and hard, so Newt rested his head on Hermann’s knee instead. He didn’t realize this was an abnormal thing for him to do until it was too late. By then, Hermann was patting the top of Newt’s head, like he was a Japanese schoolgirl or a golden retriever. 

If anyone in LOCCENT found this weird, they elected to ignore it in favor of whatever weird shit they were getting up to. Except for Tendo, who kept giving them double thumbs up. He also seemed to be collecting money from a lot of people. Newt and Hermann elected to ignore it. 

“When did you get stepped on?” asked Hermann, who was now probing gently at Newt’s hairline like he was expecting to find a footprint. “Was that at the Anti-Kaiju Shelter?” 

Newt's hair stood upright when Hermann's hand left it, even though the only product that could still be in it was kaiju placenta. 

“On the way there,” said Newt. “Right before I hit the car.” 

“You were hit by a car?” asked Hermann, frowning like he already knew that wasn't quite right. 

“No, I hit a car,” said Newt. “It was parked.”

Hermann sighed. “You should really get checked out by Medical.”

“Hermann,” Newt absolutely did not whine. “This is the first party I’ve been to in years that I’m pretty sure I’m actually invited to. Can’t we stay for a little while?” 

“If you can feel my leg, then you must know I can feel your ribs,” said Hermann. “Not to mention all the debilitating neurological damage.”

“Nah, man, that’s how my brain always looks.”

“Newton, you drifted with two kaijus.”

“The plural is still kaiju,” he said. “You know that drives me crazy.”

“Newton.”

“Fine!” Newt leaned into Hermann just enough to push his desk chair a few centimeters. “Only if you let me wheel you there.” 

Hermann crossed his arms. “Absolutely not.”

“Why not? I know your hand is starting to spasm from white-knuckling that cane for the last hour or two.”

“Try day or two,” Hermann muttered. 

“Come on, man,” Newt might have whined this time. “Our leg is killing us.”

“You sound like the Queen of England,” snapped Hermann, and then he giggled. It was a short, hiccupy thing, but it was an honest to Godzilla giggle. Newt had never gotten one of those out of him before, not even with the joke why you can’t hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom.

“You sound like the Queen of England.” Newt leaned into him again, but this time Hermann planted his feet on the floor so the chair wouldn’t move. 

“Well, we are not amused,” said Hermann. 

“Fine,” said Newt. 

He had a theory that the Queen of England had died a couple of years ago and the one they put on TV just last month for Christmas was actually a deepfake. Whenever he brought it up, Hermann got all offended on behalf of queen and country, and his stupid posh accent got even worse for the rest of the day. So of course Newt brought it up constantly.

Newt stood up with little to no cursing and helped Hermann to his feet. Then he sidled up alongside him, much like Hermann had done to him moments ago when the clock stopped. 

The clock had stopped.

This time, Newt slotted himself under Hermann’s armpit, and wrapped one arm around his waist. 

“Alright, Your Majesty. Let’s go put on our gowns.”

...

@lastdaysofwar

[flamie-42]

Soukoku’s New Year

A little present from me since I havent updated my fics in a little bit, sorry :(

It’s New Year’s Eve, Chuuya gets a mysterious text from his old partner.

Mackerel: come to our place at the port

It’s late and Chuuya is already 2 glasses deep into his celebratory end of year wine he had been saving.

But it’s Dazai and so he begrudgingly puts on his jacket and a scarf. The sound of his motorcycle carries him down the streets until he reaches a warehouse at the end of the docs.

He climbes onto the roof and there he finds his (ex) partner sitting at the peak of the roof. Without saying a word he sits down next to the taller man.

You actually came

He has a tired smile on his face as he looks off into the black abyss of the ocean.

Of course I did

It was the same response he always gave when he got texts like this one.

Why did you text

His tone was standoffish as usual but he proceeded to flop down beside Dazai on the metal roof.

I wanted to see my Chibi! It’s been a while

He was cheerful but Chuuya could see the sadness in his eyes as he spouted his usual nonsense

Yeah I’m sure, what’s the real reason

He had placed his hand on Dazai’s to force the man to look at him instead of avoiding his line of sight. Dazai’s well manicured facade fell as he did so and a more melancholy look appeared on his features

The rest of the agency is throwing a party but….

It seemed as though that thought would go farther but instead he changed his tune and switched topics

Remember our first New Years? I dragged you down here to watch the fireworks and you wouldn’t shut up about how much you hated me?

Chuuya laughed to himself, It had been a long seven years since that date and so much had changed. As he though about all of the previous years a warm body slumped against his shoulder and he could feel Dazai's hair against his neck.

Yeah you made me stay until the fireworks went off and then tried to convince me to kiss you for "good luck in the new year"

He felt a warm laugh from the man lounging on his shoulder at that comment. He pulled a cigarette out of his pocket and searched for a lighter he knew was stored in his jacket. Not finding it he huffed and motioned to Dazai. Seconds later a small flame bloomed between their huddled form and Chuuya used it to ignite the stick set between his fingers.

What if that's what I'm trying to do this year?

Dazai's muffled voice filtered up to him as he blew a puff of smoke into the darkness. Chuuya looked down to try and see if the bastard was joking or not only to be met with his unruly mop of hair blocking his face as he leaned on Chuuya's shoulder. Without seeing his old partner's face he was unable to know the real intention so he merely scoffed and took another drag of the cigarette in his hand.

mhm sure Dazai

It was the only practical response to make and it seemed to satiate Dazai as Chuuya's attention was drawn away to the sparks of color that began to paint the night sky. A loud boom echoed through the quiet port and Chuuya remembered why they always used to watch the fireworks from this spot. It almost felt as though you were right in front of the bursts as they erupted over the quiet port. He hardly noticed the absence of the weight that had just previously been attached to his shoulder until he felt a hand turn his face to the side.

Dazai was now staring right into his eyes and if Chuuya didn't know better he would have thought there was a slight blush across his cheeks. He leaned in closer until their lips fell together in a much too short kiss. As Dazai pulled back Chuuya was sure that there was a blush adorning his cheeks. As quickly as it had happened Dazai had turned away to look out at the fireworks again.

Chuuya shook his head and decided to ignore what he was sure was a goofy grin on his face. He flicked the stub of the cigarette away and pulled Dazai's face back towards him.

Come back here, Mackerel. I need some more luck

[sasuhinasno1fan]

The Queen and the Knight

So this is a gift for someone on the SasuHina Month discord and it's a continutation of this fic I did for SasuHina Month like 3 years ago. It's medival inspired and the only story out of 3 attemtps to work, as my Anne with an E/Anne of Green Gables one came to a screetching halt and my Regency with a sprinkle of Ghost Whisper suddenly became something I didn't like, so I hope they like this. It has Merlin elements with mentions of druids but they don't really appear until closer to the end of the story and they don't do very much. In terms of it being a connected fic, the only important things to note is Hinata had been exiled to rule the kingdom she's in now and she helped turn it around, becoming a loved queen. Sasuke was hired by Neji to look after her and they grew closer, him even bringing flowers for her to grow, as gardening is a big thing, the kingdom called Garden of Hope. This is set after Sasuke returns.

“I think you need to taste this for me.” 

Sasuke blinked at the custard, decorated with jam and a candy orange before looking back at the royal in front of him.

Queen Hinata Hyuuga, of the Garden of Hope, had been his charge since the moment he arrived. The kingdom had been near death before the former princess was sent in exile. She brought life back to the kingdom, mainly through growing flowers and medicinal herbs, hence the name. He wasn’t stupid, he knew with how close he’d gotten with her, that feelings had developed. He didn’t want to assume she felt the same, even though the flowers he’d brought her were scattered all across the castle’s main garden. The maids had even, on her orders, collected some to have in her room. He only knew that part as he had to collect her from there every morning from her personal maidservant.

“Um,” he said, a bit flustered. He didn’t like sweets normally, but he had a hard time saying no to her.

“What? You’d rather your queen be poisoned? This jam was a gift from the Kingdom of Sound, before we discovered they were looking for an easy way into my father’s kingdom.”

Of course he didn’t want that, but he also knew the kingdom wouldn’t risk poisoning jam. It would be too easy to figure out once a jar of preserved food was opened. Regardless, he let the queen feed him a spoonful and actually closed his eyes in satisfaction. He wasn’t lying, he hated sweets, but this was tart, but not overly so. There was, was that cinnamon? He didn’t even know they’d received that. It didn’t matter, it helped give it a taste that dulled any overpowering sweetness. “It’s, it’s fine, your majesty.”

“Oh.” She said, looking like she’d already known that. “Then perhaps the wine. Come, sit and try it for me.”

The wine that Naruto had sent over as a late celebratory gift for Hinata’s coronation? It had been aging since she didn’t drink much, but here he was, being handed a goblet and staring at the queen until he took a sip and watched her smile. He’d do anything to gain that smile, so of course it took him a while to realise, accepting the milder sweets from the queen’s fingers to realise, was she…courting him?

He dropped her off in the council room, warning the guards what would happen if anything happened to her as usual and left to start training the knights. As normal, he was stern and fierce, battling against the other knights and reminding them why a rouge knight was in charge of their queen’s safety, but his mind was a mess. What was that? Why was she doing that? When he’d returned with the flowers, she’d kissed him on the cheek but nothing happened. he knew how he felt, but her safety was more important.

_______________

“A tourney?”

Being inside the queen’s room was probably the worst thing he should be doing while she was bathing, but her personal maidservant was helping her and it was hard to converse through a wooden door. He was facing it as his queen updated him on the events of the council meeting. They were still building relations with other kingdoms, which he assumed most of the meeting had been about. Other than the Kingdom of Sound, no other kingdom had attempted to attack them. Her former kingdom hadn’t made any attempts at building bonds, but she didn’t seem bothered.

“What exactly would this be for? To celebrate the bonds we’ve created with kingdoms?”

“No,” Hinata sounded hesitant and he had to stop himself from turning to look at the screen blocking her. “They think it would be a good idea for me to use it as a way to choose a husband.”

“What?” he did turn, staring at the dark wood screen, lavender stalks etched into the frame; another gift from a member of the village. “They want you to what?”

“I told them I didn’t agree with the idea. I helped the Garden rise up by myself, with the only help given from the Yamanaka royal family of the Kingdom of Stars. I didn’t need a man then and I don’t want the kingdom thinking I need one now. They said they understood that and only wanted me to have support, but I have the kingdom for that. And you.”

Sasuke turned to the door again. “What else did they say?”

“They at least think I should have one to celebrate my arrival to the kingdom.”

“Not your coronation?”

Water seemed to hit the floor at that moment. Movement from behind the screen sounded like she’d gotten out of the bath. He tried not to focus on that. “According to the council, my arrival should have been celebrated and my willingness to help the kingdom even when I didn’t feel welcome, was proof of how much of a blessing I am. Though, those were their words.”

Not ones she’d believe. He didn’t know how she easily had the love of her whole kingdom and still couldn’t believe how much they saw her as a goddess.

A knock on the door had him calling for who it was, before telling the maid to enter. Expertly, she entered with…two plates?

“Why is there a second plate?” he asked.

“That is yours.” The queen answered, wrapped in a warm robe given to her from the Inu Kingdom and their obnoxious prince Kiba. The pale colour of her sleeping gown poked out as she walked to the head of her table. She looked at him, telling him silently to sit.

“Your majesty.” He tried saying.

“Sit.” She ordered.

He looked at the maid and maidservant, who only gave him looks and smiles like they knew what his answer would be. They did know. They knew he never said no to her unless necessary. He pulled his sword off his belt, leaving it leaning against the table within reach and watched his queen kindly thank the maid for the food and told both her and the maidservant to be back within an hour. He stared at her as she started her dinner and she didn’t look the slightest bit bothered he hadn’t started. Before he could ask what she was up to, she interrupted him.

“Are you going to compete?”

“Huh?”

“In the tourney?”

He raised a brow. “You’re agreeing to it? Even if the council wants you to pick a husband from the competitors?”

“I can’t have the people of the village take part. Even if I narrowed down the events, most are too deadly to risk doing. I might just convince them to focus on bouts, only until a person is knocked down for at least 10 seconds. Any bloodshed that risks a life is immediate disqualification and jailing, at least for a trail. I won’t let my kingdom be a place that expects deaths as entertainment.”

He could agree with that. He picked up his cutlery and started eating. The silence wasn’t stifling, it was similar to the silences they’d have where she was destressing in her garden and he’d follow her. It stayed for the rest of dinner and Hinata gave him her gentle smile as he was dismissed. He was still no closer to finding out what she was up to, but it was fine. for now.

__________

“Have you had any experience with druids?” she suddenly asked, sounding curious.

He chewed slowly as he thought. Somehow, he was being fed food again, this time as they walked through the village market. Queen Hinata was handed samples from food stalls and she’d feed him a piece of everything. Swallowing, he answered, “of sorts. Prince Naruto, the prince I know, his mother’s family is closely connected. I never got a straight answer of if that meant she is one but Naruto is either magic or incredibly lucky. I still think he’s an idiot but since he’s saved my life more than enough times, I supposed I can’t be too demanding of answers. Why?”

“There’s a druid clan near the kingdom and some of the villagers know of them. They used to go to them when illnesses were bad. Apparently, they think the clan wants to meet me. Do you think I should be worried?”

“Naruto swears unless you harm them, the clans avoid conflict. Magic needs a balance, to attack without reason would go against their beliefs. They probably want to know the person who’s been caring for the villagers. If you invite them to join in selling wares at the market, they might be willing to start integrating into the village. They’d still keep their home away from here, closer to the magic of the area.”

“Perhaps. Would I be wrong to ask them to come to the tourney? It seems like such a good place for everyone to interact.”

“They might even be willing to help the healers. You can’t go running in yourself.” He reminded.

“Your majesty!” a voice called. It was the baker’s wife. Their daughter had been one of Hinata’s first patients and as she recovered, the queen was gifted bread whenever she came into the village. She held something in a cloth. “Your majesty, my husband just finished a new dessert with the cinnamon we were given by the castle. It’s like a roll but rolled to hold the flavours of cinnamon and sugar. Please.”

Sasuke took it from the woman as he normally would with items given to the queen and opened the cloth to show the twisted roll. It even had a layer of icing. It was messy, leaving white and brown spots on the cloth, so he kept holding it and let the queen take a bite. Much like the dessert she fed him before, she moaned, loudly, much to the villagers delight and laughter.

“What does your husband call it?”

“Our daughter simply called it a 'cinnamon roll'.”

“Could your husband teach the castle cooks to make it? They’re making food for the welcoming banquet for the tourney and this would be the best dessert. It could even be served as breakfast when we send the leftovers down to the village. I will of course pay your family.”

“Might as well, we all know our queen will devour the rolls.” A merchant joked, laughing as Hinata went red.

“I will not!”

“Yes you will.” Sasuke decided to tease.

“Don’t encourage them!”

“But how can they know you love them?”

She pouted and snatched the roll away. “I’ll have the head cook come to the bakery.” She said, shooting a mild glare at Sasuke. “I’ll be heading back to the castle; I have studying to do and I think the knights need training.”

He knew a dismissal when he heard one. Guess he’d gone too far.

___________________

“The Garden of Hope. This kingdom bloomed back to life thanks to their queen, Queen Hinata and today is the anniversary of when she arrived in this kingdom. You hadn’t crowned her yet, but she was your queen and she has been the person who will lay down her life for you. We also know she will do the same for us, druids she only heard of and only met a day ago, just because we’d be in trouble. We will do the same for her. We hear, that on your coronation, your crown had been made of flowers, made by loving hands, like your crown today.” The druid leader said, his long white hair and severe beard and moustache making him look unapproachable, though his calm deep voice kept the whole kingdom calm.

As Hinata had come to be seated in the box, she’d been stopped by a crowd of the village children. The village seamstress' son had yelled at them for a moment when she started to kneel to be at their level, not wanting the pale purple and white to be dirtied, including the sleeve cap that trailed as long as her dress. They ignored him as they handed her the flower crown, made by all the children of the village with their own favourite flowers. It was messy and only the help from the older kids kept it from being lopsided but the queen’s smile and delight had been the biggest they’d seen.

“Our original plan had been to create you a crown with protective crystals, but from speaking with you last night at the feast, you would only worry over your subjects than yourself. You have your knight to look after your safety to keep you focused on your people and we can’t think of a more deserving crown than the one made with their loving hands.”

Sasuke, standing with the rest of the contestants for the tourney, still did his duty and went over to the box to take the crown Hinata handed down to him and brought it to the druid leader.

“I’d worry if you destroy it. it’ll either be the queen of the children. Honestly, the children are much scarier.”

The leader didn’t know if to believe him but he still handled the crown carefully. A crystal in hand, they all watched magic become visible as the flowers go from live items to become like crystal lined in gold.

“May the living embodiment of your people’s love be a reminder of who you protect.”

The cheers from the crowds grew in volume as Sasuke passed the crown back to Hinata’s maidservant, who carefully recrowned the Queen of the Garden of Hope.

As the fights had started, Sasuke stayed inside his tent, more focused with arming himself in his armour, as his squire Boruto – Naruto’s younger cousin who he sent to Sasuke when the young one wouldn’t stop begging him – watched the matches to observe and update him on the winners.

He hadn’t planed on participating, expecting to be in his normal place of at his queen’s side. The same day he’d teased her in front of the village members, she’d still been pouting about it and he asked what he could do to cheer her up. She got this look in her eyes and turned to him, telling him to participate and win if he wanted her forgiveness. And since he was incapable of saying no to her, here he was, buckling the vambrace on.

“Let me help.” He looked up to see the queen entering, her maidservant following. 

“What are you doing here? The matches are still happening aren’t they?”

“Master Sasuke!” Boruto yelled, skidding to a stop when he realised he was about to crash into the queen. “Um…”

“Finish your sentence.” He ordered the boy. It was clear to see the relation between him and Naruto sometimes.

“The last fight ended because one of the opponents was headbutted. Her majesty disqualified the one who did it and is waiting until hearing the injured opponent will be alright before continuing the matches. So, you’re match got pushed up.”

“Thank you Boruto. Perhaps you can also have a break? The druids have brought fruits from their orchards for the village to taste. Hotaru can take you.” Hinata said, nodding to her maidservant.

Any other woman he’d be worried about, but everyone knew there were multiple times the two were alone together and no one would dare accuse her of anything happening, not when his sword was close at hand. Besides, even with him with her majesty, he had no doubt the knights who were actually on duty were nearby.

“Can I?” she asked, lifting her hands, hovering over his arm.

He held it out, watching her easily buckle the vambrace into place and even passing her the other when she gestured to it.

“Can I ask why you wanted me to participate? Any of the knights easily could have done this. My main duty is to you.”

“I know.” he stared waiting for her to speak again, but she stayed silent.

“The past few weeks, you’ve…been doing things.”

“Have I?” she asked, clearly faking her questioning tone.

“Feeding me food, our outings feel different. When I came back from the Kingdom of Stars, you…things changed.”

“Are you upset with the changes?”

“No.” he answered. “I just…am a little lost on what they mean.”

She looked up at him, sliding her hand down until it slipped into his. “Is it difficult to understand?”

He was being an idiot, wasn’t he?

What she was saying had to be obvious, he just didn’t think it was possible or proper. When had she ever done anything proper as a royal? She interacted with her kingdom constantly, healed them and accepted their gifts. She earned their gifts and love to the point that they wanted to celebrate her arrival, even when they hadn’t appreciated her when she arrived. She got dirty in her garden, would chase the village children in their games and could run circles around the council before they realised she knew exactly what she was doing. He was hired by her cousin but he stayed for her. The flowers he brought back were always present in her room.

Gods, he was an idiot wasn’t he?

“Master Sasuke, look! It’s called a peach!” Boruto yelled, running into the tent again, barely skidding to a stop to not crash into the queen.

“Hotaru, the item?” the queen asked. She was handed something that made Boruto’s eyes widen. She turned back to him and placed a handkerchief in his hand.

If hadn’t realised before, he did now. It was the same purple she favoured in her gowns and had a ring of flowers sewn on one corner.

“I will keep this safe, your majesty. The prize tonight is to sit at your side for the feast; I hope to be the one.” he said, bowing his head.

“Always. Come Hotaru, we should see if the knight is alright and continue the tourney. Sir Sasuke has to win.” She said, with a smile over her shoulder. 

He stared as the door to the tent flopped shut, unable to help the smile growing on his face as he looked at the handkerchief.

“The queen…” Boruto struggled to come up with a sentence.

“Yes, the queen.” Sasuke said, pressing a kiss onto the token. “Eat that quickly, I’m going to wait by the arena.”

Visiting knights had been upset that the queen’s own personal guard earned the right to eat by her side, but every member of the Garden of Hope told them the same thing: The Queen and her knight would never stray far from each other. The Queen would always choose her knight and she’d continue to do so when he became King Consort, just like he would always protect her, whether sworn by duty or by marriage vows.

[tetsunabouquet]

Literally my first time making a request, but I adore your writing so I had to 🥹

I would absolutely love some kinktober headcanons of some vampire knight characters <3 Especially about Zero and Ichiru, because we love hot twins in here 🍵

I reread the ones from last year every damn time 😭

A/N: Oh my god, I am the first? That's an honor, thank you so much and it also warms my heart to hear you adored my headcanons. I do always decide a bit of a theme and considering I already wrote general headcanons about the twins and the bodyguard AU ones, I picked another AU theme for this one! I hope you like an arranged marriage theme~

Also, I wanted to post this yesterday as I was nearly done but then my chronic illness flared up and I had to rest T-T

(18+)

Zero General Background -As the eldest son of a outstanding vampire hunting lineage, it was a tragedy when he became a vampire. His parents had already arranged a fianceé for him from another hunter lineage, but surprisingly, you didn't wanted the contract to be annulled upon him turning into a vampire. You had met him a few times before and liked him well enough. You were too scared to be matched up to someone else, someone with a worse character. -Zero often considers himself lucky for his parents having matched him with a girl as wonderful as you. It didn't take long before your distant friendship morphed into love as you kept by his side and supported him throughout the process of turning into a vampire.

Smut -You attended Cross Academy with him, and because you were his fianceé, nobody questioned you going into each other's dorm rooms, even if they heard moans coming from the room. -Which is how every girl in the Sun Dorms ended up hearing you losing your virginity there. -Instead of Yuki, he also always goes to drink from you and you decided to allow him to drink from you in more hidden places like your upper thigh. -When Zero decided to get himself an apartment, he asked if you wanted to officially move in with him and get used to living with him before you got married. Which is how his habit of fucking you every time he came back from a particularly rough hunting mission started. -After marriage, Zero took a month off for the honeymoon and he definitely impregnated you after the first few celebratory days filled with fucking. -You couldn't help but joke afte the two of you got back and you had to tell everyone you were pregnant, that it was 'all the coconut milk you've received,' to your friends. -After you got home, Zero was like, "What was that about coconut milk? I've got some more if you're thirsty." (he's preparing for the dad jokes already)

Ichiru

General Background -Considering he bailed out with Shizuka only to meet you again at Cross Academy, your relationship began very dramatically. Ichiru was shocked that you had remained loyal and hoping for his return because you actually knew he was still alive. -He quit his revenge plans because he realized you still wanted to marry him and how hurt you were over him 'leaving you for Shizuka' as you put it. If he died, then he'd only make your pain worse and you had done nothing to deserve it.

Smut -Like above ^, no one questioned you or Ichiru going to each others rooms knowing you were engaged, and trust me when I say this boy did a lot of making up to you. An example of this was Ichiru's routine of eating you out every time you all had a test. -He took your viginity upon your graduation, feeling like he had to up his usual 'reward' and at this point his dick was practically howling to be inside you after all those naughty sessions. -Ichiru had to redo the year because of how little he studies and how much of school he's missed and you would typically send him sleazy photos of yourself after his homework sessions to reward him. -Phone sex was a regular event during the evenings when he was still attending Cross Academy. He would jerk himself off in his bed at the Sun Dorm as you teased him through the connection at the other end. -As a graduation reward, you let him suck on your tits for as long as he wanted. You definitely couldn't help but think he would drink your milk once you'd get pregnant. -Fucked you pregnant as soon as he moved in with you because he was too pent up having to deal with just jerk off sessions in his final year. -Once you started producing milk, your prediction came true and Ichiru would just suckle peacefully on your breasts.

[worstjourney]

End-of-2023 Update

I forgot to crosspost my November update from Patreon (in my defence, I was in Norway and then ill) so here is a mashup of November and December, wrapping up 2023 in one convenient post.

Book Stuff

I have finished an outline for the three remaining books of the series. This pass is just making very basic decisions about what gets included and what doesn’t, and roughly shaping the narrative so that I have a basic road map in place before getting creative. Cherry’s 600-page brick is actually quite lean when approached with this lens; I’m trying to let him make a lot of these decisions for me, but sometimes our priorities don’t really align and I’ve had to bring in other sources. Once this bullet-point list is done, then I go back over each section with my storytelling brain turned on, and go into greater narrative detail, so that when I write a script I only have to think about making a good script, and not structural matters. It’s a slow process, but it’s rewarding to feel that, after many months of chasing the whirlwind, I’m finally making forward progress on bringing books into the world.

Events

At the end of November, I made my first-ever trip to Oslo to speak at the 11th annual Roald Amundsen Memorial Lectures, a weekend of intense polar nerdery at the Fram Museum. Other speakers included scientists, explorers, filmmakers and musicians, all unified by a love of polar history, as well as a recreation of the celebratory dinner given for Amundsen on his successful return from the South Pole in 1912. It was a spectacularly good time, and highly recommended to anyone who might be inclined to go to that sort of thing in future. I will have to go back sometime to give the Fram Museum more dedicated attention, as the talks took up most of my time there and I hardly got to explore.

In December, I was supposed to have been a historical guest on a Zoom panel discussing Ralph Vaughan Williams’ Sinfonia Antarctica, which started life as the score to the 1948 film Scott of the Antarctic.  However, too many of us were ill on the scheduled date, so it was deferred to January 15th. I will share the link, when it becomes available, over on Patreon; should a publicly-accessible recording be produced, I will share that here. The panel also includes Polar historiographer Anne Strathie, who will be bringing her expertise on Herbert Ponting and his photographs in particular, and two experts from the States, who will be approaching the material from a biographical and musical perspective, respectively.

An online event which did come off was being one half of the second keynote of Terror Camp, an online gathering that mashes up a fan convention and academic conference. The esteemed nonfiction-writer-turned-novelist Francis Spufford and I talked about writing Polar history, from two very different perspectives. It was excellent fun and seemed to have been received well; I don’t know if the recording is available to those who weren’t registered in advance for the event, but if you’re desperate to see it, it may be worth asking.

Media

I came back from Norway with a stack of books and one DVD. Being ill through the greater part of December gave me a chance to start tackling them, and I’ve written a bit about some of them on December’s Patreon Update, because there wasn’t much else to write. Feel free to nip over there if you’re curious; the post is, like all Updates, open to the public.

If you’d like to hear the guys you mostly only see in photos, you may appreciate this fine programme from the vaults of Radio New Zealand: https://www.ngataonga.org.nz/search-use-collection/search/28712/ It’s RNZ’s take on the 50th anniversary of the Expedition, including many clips from the parallel BBC programme for which my beloved tapes of Sir Charles Wright were recorded. This show also contains a good deal from Tom Clissold, who was living in New Zealand by then, and T. Griffith Taylor.  Many thanks to the intrepid Allegra Rosenberg for finding this and bringing it to my attention.

Also hot off Allegra’s desk is the followup to Antarctic Lovebirds, looking at further communications between Atkinson and Pennell, and their lives post-Expedition.  I challenge anyone not to be a little bit in love with these guys.

On Patreon

I’ve started doing themed months on Patreon. November’s theme was Scott’s Ponies, and saw the following posts (currently available to Patrons only):

Equine Studies

The Backstory of Scott’s Ponies

A Guide to Scott’s Ponies

The theme for December’s posts was Writing, which included:

The Art of Adaptation

The Master Timeline, Again

Understanding the Characters

The Shape Of The Rest Of The Series

There was also a secret post for the Paper Money tier, who get bonus behind-the-scenes features. The Writing theme will probably spill over into January a bit, but with one or two more visually-oriented posts if I can manage it.

If you want to see what Patreon is like without committing to anything, you can sign up for a week’s free trial at almost any tier, and read as much as you can cram in your eyeballs in that time. You can also subscribe directly to the Free tier and you will get Updates like this, as well as any posts that get made public. Of course, if you feel moved to toss a little cash into the potato pot to support the creation of these graphic novels, that is greatly appreciated, and you get weekly posts in return.

–––––––––

2023 is a mixed year to look back on.  On one hand, I did a lot of things; on the other, I made vastly less progress than expected.  I think, primarily, I underestimated how much time and energy the publicity rounds would demand; I thought I could juggle that stuff with getting the research in order, and it turns out, I really could not.  I think I know better now what sort of events are worth it and which aren’t, but whether I’ll be allowed to act on that knowledge in future, I don’t know.  Even excluding the bookselling business, it felt like every time I had a span of work time, something would come up that would keep me from working – December’s illnesses being the latest example, but in a long string of unforeseen somethings that had to be accommodated.  I don’t remember this happening when I had a “real” job, and I’m not sure why.  2024 isn’t looking much better in this regard: I already know that January, February, probably May-ish, and possibly September are compromised.  I need to figure out how to use these as bookends to keep me focused between times, rather than letting them be derailing distractions.  (Any advice here is gratefully accepted.) But I have at least got the ball rolling on writing, so as long as I keep chipping away on that, I ought to inch forward … and once the writing is done, the drawing, which is the fun part!