#I thought it was really obvious the entire question of his character was 'how much bad is worth it for the greater good?'
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Oh! I think about this a lot, though I'm not really sure why besides that how people make decisions about children is inherently kind of interesting to me.
The Aaravos situation is unusual in that there's a relatively short timeline attached to itâthey aren't putting off having children until some nebulous future time when there might finally not be some kind of crisis somewhere, they're putting it off for seven years, at which point they will be... all of 25 years old, which is generally considered to be a much better time to have a baby than 19 or 20. I've read stuff in other fandoms where the decision of whether to have a child during a time of threatened world crisis becomes about weighing the risks of the child growing up without one or both parents, or growing up in a dangerous and war-torn environment, or not growing up at all against the risk that the world will simply never be sufficiently safe. With a definite finality of "within ten years, either we have stopped Aaravos for good or the world has ended"... they might as well wait, which may or may not be bittersweet depending on how badly they want to get started.
(One thing that's interestingly vague about this setting is what/when is considered to be "adulthood." That's a number that has been pushed later and later in modern times, which is not a bad thing! However, looking at the characters themselvesâRayla is functionally a child soldier at 15, and Soren is already an officer in the Crownguard at 18, meaning he probably joined and was expected to be ready to die for his king at 16 or earlier. Callum being High Mage to Ezran makes sense, but is also literally putting a teenager in a government cabinet position. What makes all of that slightly less weird is that culturally, here in real world USAmerica and/or Canada, we have essentially added an entire new stage of non-adult life after 18, during which you are expected to figure out a career trajectory of some kind. When you remove the expectation of higher education from the question, "I have already launched my lifelong career at 16" works a little better. At that point, "I will start a family at 20-21" also sounds less insane because they've already been operating as an adult for several years.)
Anyway what I think would be really interesting about the whole question is the competing influences on both sidesâJanai and Amaya explicitly get married during Karim's rebellion because she's "done putting off the good things for fear of the bad," and I think Ethari and Runaan would have a thought or two about waiting for the time to be "right" versus valuing yourselves and your family. Bringing a child into the world is obviously a bit different from getting married, but I think the "don't let the evil in the world dictate when you can seize joy" philosophy could still apply.
On the other hand, you have the personal experiences of Callum, Rayla, and Ezran with having absent parents. Callum lost his father as a young child, then his mother not long after, and was raised by his stepfather. Ezran never had a mother in his life, and lost his father, as well. One set of Rayla's parents left to defend the world and never came back. I think they'd all have some Big Feelings about those thingsâmost obviously Rayla's parents, as the obvious closest analogue to their situation, but also like... it's at least kind of implied that Sarai and Damian had a child despite both of them knowing that he would likely not live to see that child grow up. I think it's unlikely that Callum doesn't feel Some Kind Of Way about that. Parental loss/abandonment trauma affects basically every character in this entire story, and while they all deal with it a bit differently... they all gotta deal with it.
(And of course, if you want to get extra angstyâwhat happens if suddenly OOPS ALL PREGNANT? What if it's in year one post-s7 versus year six post-s7? Do they keep the baby? Do they let Aaravos prevent them from keeping a child who is otherwise wanted? I feel like that's a much harder choice than whether to start trying for one.)
Rayllum, 10 babies and Xadian family planning
Iâm trying to post the next chapter of Dark Alternative, but AO3 is very wonky, so youâre going to be subjected to my rambling thoughts on my new WIP for Work in Progress Wednesday.
So, over my vacation, Iâve been plagued by post-season 7 fanfic ideas. Short fics, obviously. No more than three chapters, as usual.
Whatâs got me intrigued right now, is how the continent of Xadia, or at least, a select group of people, will manage with living with the knowledge that Aaravos, in some form, is coming back in seven years. How would that affect politics and society, as well as the individual characters and the choices they make knowing that?
The regular folks would struggle to miss that whole eternal darkness and dead creatures thing that happened, but what do they know about exactly what went down?
And what do they know about whatâs to come?
You know me, Iâm a Rayllum person, so pretty much any fic of mine is a Rayllum fic, and this current idea is focused on how this particular threat affects the next stage of their lives.
Without a doubt, when we last saw Rayllum they were totally committed to each other and are fully ride or die⊠but how would that devotion relate to their future, in particular, the subject of children?
Now, Iâm an angster in my deep dark heart, so while Iâm sure many people could conceive of a fic where Rayllum are secure in their ability to defeat Aaravos come round two, that ainât where my brain was ever going to go.
Rayllum are in love and clearly want a future together. Callum was openly planning a quaint little one in the Silvergrove before they were rudely interrupted by the whole end of the world dealio.
So, where does that leave them now (in my angsty reality anyway)?
In their youth, they both leaned into their more paranoid natures (Rayla leaving without Callum in TTM and Callum getting physical with Soren in season 4), and while theyâve both grown and matured since then, would such a threat as the world ending be enough to bring that paranoia right on back?
Which leaves me with my current fic planning conundrum.
Assuming Rayllum decided to forego the whole having kids thing until Aaravos is imprisoned again, how likely is it that they could plan when to have a family.
Iâve seen people say that the world of The Dragon Prince is in a medieval setting, and so people had children younger then, which, aside from not being the entire story, doesnât feel like it really applies to a world with magic and dragons, a world that lacks the sexism and gender roles that are also associated with medieval times or other more grounded works set then.
Additionally, looking at canon, I think it could be reasonably argued that some form of birth control is readily available in the setting. In fact, I think itâs likely multiple forms of birth control exist in the world of The Dragon Prince.
From humans to elves, we donât see large families normally associated with the inability to plan a family via the use of effective birth control. The âlargestâ family we see are the Sunfire monarchs, with three children. Viren and Lissa had two children only. Sarai may well have had more children had she lived, but Raylaâs parents spent multiple years at the Storm Spire and she remained an only child.
I canât imagine thereâs much in the way of entertainment at the Storm Spire either. Sure, they could abstain or get creative, but oof, hasnât enough been asked of them?
Even looking at prior generations, we do not see large families. Given the closeness in ages of the siblings we know of, it also seems unlikely to me that children were lost in childbirth or to childhood illnesses.
To me, it seems far more likely that family planning is active in Xadia and would be a tool Callum and Rayla could exercise.
Clearly, no birth control is infallible (or I guess it can be, magic and all) and I assume Miyanaâs twins were unplanned.
Personally, I head canon Rayla herself was an oopsie baby in order to further explain the complications of her parents being called away to join the Dragon Guard.
Where am I going with this? I donât even know anymore.
I suppose, to me, itâs not a foregone conclusion that in seven years Rayllum would have a kid (or indeed multiple). The setting of the world doesnât imply that itâs particularly difficult to prevent pregnancy. In fact, the small families imply to me that family planning is a cultural norm among elves and humans.
Faced with the imminent threat of Aaravosâ return, would Rayllum plan to start a family? Certainly, people put off having children for far lesser reasons.
We also donât know how using dark magic, even in that limited capacity, has affected Callum and the potential for him to get possessed again. It was clearly enough to physically mark him, but does that go deeper?
Would imprisoning Aaravos once again result in an inevitable possession?
Not great when Dad gets taken over and abandons the family.
Or worse, Mum has to take him out.
Angsty though!
As usual, Iâll be doing my own thing in my fics, but Iâm interested to see where Arc 3 goes with this (optimistically assuming we get it). There are a lot of factors at play to explain why we might see a lot of the characters in a state of stasis. Seven years isnât that long when youâre facing the world ending, after all. Particularly when youâre likely to play a very active part in trying to stop that returning apocalypse.
So, which way to go? I see the angst potential in both.
On one hand, youâve got the pain and desperation of protecting your kid from a returned Aaravos, or perhaps worse, a possessed Dad.
But on the other, youâve got two people who likely want to take the next steps in their lives, but feel the pressure of a ticking bomb haunting them and potentially preventing them from moving forward.
Either way, bring on the pain.
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
#sote spoilers#seen so much 'it goes against his character' but like. WHAT CHARACTER. WE NEVER MET HIM#everything we heard about miquella was from 1. his religious devotees 2. his loyal guard dog#why would anyone ever take that as unbiased information.#like yeah sure he has good intentions. but that doesn't mean good actions#I thought it was really obvious the entire question of his character was 'how much bad is worth it for the greater good?'#you mean to tell me y'all WEREN'T picking up on that ????#why would you ever trust someone to be a 100% good person in a fromsoft game anyway#that has literally never happened#sanders bullshit#elden ring#saw a post that was like âsick of empathetic characters who turn out to be huge bastardsâ HEâS STILL EMPATHETIC#it's about shades of gray it's about hubris what's not clicking here
129 notes
·
View notes
Text
[ DUSK âTILL DAWN : 008 ]
âwe who bear the burden of the crown do not need to love. you only need to stay here, with me, in power, in greed, in lust â in victory.â
c/w. modern royal au. infidelity. angst. gaslighting. toxic characters. toxic relationships. mentions of neglect and abuse. hurt and comfort. unedited.
notes. thank you to everyone who waited patiently, i hope you guys enjoy this chapter <3 this will be the beginning of kiyoomi arc!
wc. 11k
series masterlist | next
[ EIGHT ] all they keep asking me is if Iâm gonna be your bride â the only kind of girl they see is a one-night or a wife
The Kingdom of Inarizaki was at a loss whether to celebrate the early return of the latest married couple from their honeymoon. The couple seemed to be doing great â according to the tabloids, anyway. When they arrived, the Princes and their wives waved to the people, all eager for a glimpse of the infamous couple who had married for love. For two years, society had their eyes on you â the shy, reserved noblewoman who caught the eye and heart of their one and only Crown Prince Suna Rintaro. And oh, what a wedding it was, broadcasted all over the world and celebrated like a holiday.
What the world didnât know was that it was an entirely different story behind the Palace walls.
You may share a bedroom, but never the bed. Youâd been acquainted with the couch for the next few nights, only seeing your husband once in the mornings before he left to do his duties, and every now and then when the Queen wanted to have dinner. Not that you were complaining â the space was most appreciated. Without Suna lingering, thereâd be less reminders of how much of a fool he took you. A naĂŻve, young woman who really deluded herself into believing a Prince could want her. AlthoughâŠ
Suna didnât not want you, either.
In the few spaces in between, he would look for you. He would make small talk and ask if youâve eaten. If you liked breakfast, which was a silly question, since it was always tea and waffles. If you enjoyed yourself while he was away, this, again, was a silly question. You spent the mindânumbing hours blaming yourself for being in this predicament. That, perhaps, if you had just been brave to walk away that night you found out the truth, then you wouldnât be out here wondering if the maidsâ whispers were true â that Suna spent most of his nights at Belleview Manor, because quote unquote, âhe was unwelcome in his own quarters.â
As if somehow it was your fault he did not feel comfortable to sleep under the same roof with you.
Sighing, you flipped your novel closed. No one had given you official duties yet, other than the blatantly obvious one of giving the Crown Prince an heir. âThey will have such sleepless nights!â, the Queenâs goons crooned. âSo young and virile, they are, weâll have a new Crown Prince in no time!â Oh, if only it were that easy. If there were to be a Prince, Iris would most likely be the mother, considering he saw her more often than you did. And how funny of a thought that was â you wanted distance from him, yet something died inside you little by little the colder your room got.
âSince we have returned, my schedule will be full.â
You glanced up from where you sat. Suna had sauntered back into the room, his tie loosened; hair messed up like he ran his fingers through it several times. Already, a servant stood beside him to comb his hair back neatly. You couldnât help but stare. How long had it been since you combed his hair for him? You knew he hated it when they gelled it back. He preferred it messy and unkempt, saying his bedroom hair felt most natural. The bedroom hair heâs shown only to you in the quiet breaks of the night when he was in your bed.
The bedroom hair Iris had seen, as well.
Just the thought of it forces a smile on your face. Standing up, you brushed off the imaginary dust off your skirt. Less than a week in the Palace, and you were already so miserable. You could at least try to look less bothered by his unrequited affections.
âDo what you must.â
Once his hair had been brushed to perfection, Suna gestured for his servant to step away. The man politely bowed down before exiting the room. âI mean to say,â he continued, stepping closer now that there was no one else around. Your breath hitched the closer he got, but you dared not move, not even when his warm, familiar hand cups the curve of your cheek. âThe meetings I must attend and people to deal with will take up most of my time.â
You knew what he was trying to say â that he wouldnât be around, and you had to entertain yourself in his absence. Gently, you take a step back from his touch, watching as an unreadable expression crosses his face.
âAnd as I have said, do what you must. I have my own duties to fulfill as well.â
âYou do not sound bothered by this.â
âWhy should I be?â you shrugged, âIf I am to be stuck with you for the rest of my life, surely I can enjoy what little time left I have for myself.â
Sunaâs lips thinned. âYou could act a little less eager to get rid of me.â
âOn the contrary, I have no intention of leaving.â
âSo I will see you tonight?â
âIf we run into each other at the palace, yes, yes you will.â
If he seemed discontent with your halfâhearted response, he did not show it. Must be the practiced regality and composure befitting for a Crown Prince like him â all lazy, yet wary, watching eyes. He, too, must know the true meaning behind your words. There was no need to pretend.
You both knew Suna would run into Belleview Manor as soon as the night ends, and his duties for the day had been tended to. Meanwhile, his wife would stay up all night in her couch.
Not quite waiting for him, but not quite imagining if he slept better at her side, either.
It was an unspoken deal between you two already. So he leaves without another word, and you let out a breath you didnât realize youâd been holding when the door finally slams shut.
Tears prick at your eyes for the umpteenth time. You were tired of this. Tired of not knowing where you truly were in his life â were you his wife, his friend? After youâd heard of his passion and dedication to Iris, you werenât so evil to stop him from seeing her. He loved her first. And you of all people should know the pain of not having the one person you wanted most. To him, she was his unattainable treasure. She was already making him smile before you even came to his life. She was already offering companionship and the comfort he desperately needed in this tiresome world of politics and power. She was his solace in all this chaos.
And you⊠you were just his wife. And without a baby in your belly, you might as well be just another useless figure in the Palace.
You refused to be so.
You may be worthless to him as his wife, for you truly couldnât have his heart, but you refused to be a worthless person. Deep down, you knew you werenât. It was just the title of âPrincessâ that made you feel incapable and short. Did that mean you werenât meant to be Princess, then? Should you go back to your manor, learning how to handle the household and managing the family business like your parents taught?
If you were not for Suna, did that mean you were not for the Crown, as well?
You bit your lip in contemplation. There was only one person who could provide you a solution to this.
âIt is not every day I am summoned by a Princess,â a smooth, deep voice filtered through the garden. Smiling, you stood up to greet the Third Prince. A curtsy, a bow, and soon you two were sipping tea â the momentary peace a guise of what was to come. Kita must have sensed it, too, his gaze flitting over your pinched face with understanding and patience. âTo what do I owe this pleasure? Surely we are not here to discuss the pleasantries of your honeymoon.â
You grimaced. âDefinitely not. There were no pleasantries to begin with.â
His face fell.
âIâm sorry to hear that. Are you⊠My apologies. Iâm not sure how to proceed with this.â
Nodding, you set your tea town. You had a feeling he truly meant his apology, which felt good, seeing as most of the Princes had too much pride to know the word âsorry.â But you hd always known that Prince Kita was unlike the other Princes â he had more honor, and a stronger sense of morality compared to his brothers. Maybe it was due to his being raised by his mother, who was a lawyer, and therefore was not so exposed to the greed and competition experienced by the other Princes.
Whatever it was, he was just different. And you could rely on him to be truthful, too.
âHave you always known about them?â you muttered, refusing to look at the Princeâs face in fear of being met with pity. That was the last thing you wanted â to be seen as the poor, unwanted wife. âIris and Rintaro?â
âI have.â
âI see.â
Kita sighed. âPlease donât misunderstand, Princess. I never meant to keep it from you. None of us did â except for those truly involved. It was just⊠I grew up with them, too. Keiji and I were only a year ahead of Rintaro and Iris. When I heard the Crown Prince had become acquainted with a foreign royal scholar, we didnât think too much of it. Her sudden marriage with Kiyoomi surprised us all, and none of us wouldâve thought that her friendship with Rintaro would turn into something more.â
âYou donât need to explain all of this to me, Your Highness.â
âPerhaps, butâŠâ reaching over the table, the Prince squeezed your knuckle. You chuckled, not having realized youâd balled up your hands into a fist. It turned out you couldnât fool anyone, not even yourself, to act like you didnât care how much it all hurt. âI do not want you to think I am not on your side.â
âYou do not need to be on my side. He is your brother.â
âBlood means little to me when my own kind is cruel to others,â he retorted, looking offended you would suggest otherwise. âI have always been against it, Princess. I told him from the beginning that to covet oneâs brotherâs wife is one thing, but to involve someone else, all for his selfish reason of ascending a throne that was always rightfully his just seemed heartless.â
Heartless. Gods. To know that your husband was capable of being cruel was one thing, but to hear it coming from his own brotherâs lips was another.
âBut Rintaro is Rintaro. Of course he is stubborn.â
âIndeed, he is,â Prince Kita sighed in defeat, leaning back against his seat as he stroked his chin in thought. âPrincess, while I cannot guarantee I can take all of your woes away, I want you to know you can trust me. If there is anything you need, let me know and I will do it for you. Itâs the least I can do to make your stay here in the Palace tolerable.â
âDo you mean that?â
âI do, and I am a man of my word.â
âThen I suppose thereâs no point beating around the bush,â you gritted your teeth, forcing the words to come out.
It had always been a lingering thought at the back of your mind â to leave Rintaro â but there was this prideful, equally stubborn voice at the back of your head telling you it was too early to give up. That you needed to fight. But what was there to fight for? It wasnât like Rintaro would learn to love you. And neither do you plan on wooing him. So, instead, you swallowed up your pride and called for Kita, knowing he would never judge you for the choices you were about to make.
âI actually called for you today because I wish to discuss royal marital laws, possibly with your mother. She would know about it best.â
âYou need legal counsel,â he caught on, and you nod, âI can arrange that. I assume you want it discreetly, too. That is no problem at all. But if I may be bold, I wish to ask something from you in return.â
âName your price.â
âIt is about this maid that I am fond of. Airi,â her name came out breathily from his mouth, almost like a whisper. You noticed the Prince glancing around the empty garden almost warily, though you already took measures to ensure no one would be around to witness this conversation. Reassured, Kita sat up straighter and looked you in the eye, nothing but sincerity and determination in his expression. âI will do anything you ask of me, as long as it is within legal reasons, if you take her in as your personal maid.â
âIâve heard rumors about you having affections for a maid in your quarters,â you mumbled, feeling almost sorry for the kindâhearted Prince. It seemed he, too, did not escape the heartbreaking torment for falling for a person you could never have. âSo it is true, after all.â
âIt is. You seem surprised about it. Is it so shocking to learn of a Prince having genuine feelings for another?â
You shook your head. âNot at all. I think I should know best that passion is something you brothers certainly have,â you snort, and Kita fights back a grin. âVery well, then. I will take care of your lovely maid, although I do wish to know â why are you assigning her to me? Have you⊠done anything to stain her honor?â
The color seeped out of the Princeâs face.
âI would never do such a thing.â
âI figured you wouldnât.â
Kitaâs shoulders squared before he exhaled. âAiri is⊠Ever since I set my sights on her, she has been in danger. People have been very unkind towards her, especially with the staff in my quarters. And as much as I would love having her by my side in my every waking hour, it would break my heart to know that she is being looked down upon simply because I admire her. But I figure with her at your side, with a new assignment, she will have some peace.â
Your heart ached for him. You could tell this was not an easy decision to make, but a necessary one if he wanted to ensure his loverâs well-being.
âYou can still see her, Your Highness. Itâs not like I will take her away from you.â
âI wouldnât let you, either, but these are very difficult times for everyone in the Palace. The security of the throne weakens every day. The Parliament is restless, and there is only so little I can do with all these failed unions,â he rattled on, eyes widening when he realized it too late. Bowing his head, the Princeâs brows furrowed. âMy apologies. I didnât mean toââ
âOur marriage is not a failed union. Not yet. I will make certain it will not be a failure.â
It couldnât be a failure. There was only one way out of this dreadful marriage, and as much as you hated it, that exit only existed in a path where you had no choice but to let him be a great King. This is why you need Kitaâs motherâs counsel. Surely there could be a loophole in the clause that would invalidate the marriage. But until that opportunity presents itself, you were stuck here in this Castle, surrounded by everyone but your husband.
You had to make it work.
âWith all due respect, Princess,â sighs the Prince, looking more remorseful than irritated. âWhy is it that you try so hard? You do not need to stay with him, you know. It may be against the law for royal marriages to be annulled, but surely we can find a way. You do not need to torture yourself by spending one more day with your husband.â
âI know that.â
âThen why do you stay?â
âBecause,â you croaked out, feeling a lump grow in your throat. âBecause loving him is all I had known, and perhaps it is time I learn to despise him, as well.â
Silence stretches. The prince sat there, unmoving, as your words hang in the thick air between you two. You knew he would understand; he wouldnât judge. But there is still concern in his handsome features that made you realize how pitiful you really are. And maybe there was no one else to blame but yourself, because you were foolish, and in love. But you were trying â by the Gods, you really were doing your best â to just be in love and not have to be foolish anymore.
Kita could see this as well. Your strength, your grit. He could see everything from where he sat, and that was why he simply nodded. âAre you getting there yet?â
âI will get there someday.â
Before the Prince could say anything else, a servant appeared from the bushes. He looked sheepish upon the intrusion, an apologetic smile on his face directed to the Prince. âYour Highness. It is time for your lessons.â
The Prince sent you a knowing look. This was not to be the last time you see each other, and you smiled up at him, grateful. It felt good to have at least one person you could lean on in the Palace. You stood up, too, shaking his hand just as his servant excused himself. If your memory did not fail you, the Third Prince studied law outside of the Palace and had to attend university, unlike his brothers who had chosen to indulge in their promised wealth after graduating high school.
âExcuse me, Your Highness. I have matters to attend to, but my words still ring true â I am only a call away should you need me.â
âThank you so much for your time, my Prince.â
âIt was my pleasure. I will inform you right away of my motherâs availability.â
âOh, and Princess,â piped up the servant from somewhere around the bushes, âPrincess Maiko is looking for you. She is waiting for you in her drawing room.â
You shouldâve expected that Princess Maiko would come looking for you. The whole ordeal she witnessed back at your rest house must have come as a shock for her. Sure, her marriage didnât go so well, either, but at least Tooru hadnât gone around sleeping with someone else. For a man who didnât want to get married, he kept to his vow of loyalty to his wife. Still, you didnât want this to be a competition on who had it worse â Maiko was simply worried, and you had to explain yourself for your untoward behavior on everyoneâs getaway.
âPrincess! Oh my gosh â how are you?! I was worried sick!â
âPrincess,â you return her hug, smiling despite the fact the smaller Princess had a boneâcrushing grip. âThank you for your concern, but I assure you, I am well.â
âOh, Princess, you couldnât be,â she pulled back with tears in her eyes. You almost apologized on the spot now that you remembered demanding to return to the City without informing the others why. Especially not Maiko, who seemed to be clueless. âI⊠I heard from Tooru about everything. The entire situation with Iris and the Crown Prince â truly, I did not know a single thing. If I had, I would have told you right away.â
âI know, and Iâm thankful for your support.â
You squeeze her hand in reassurance, and the Princess leads you to sit on the couch. She slumps on it rather ungracefully, her innocent, wide eyes moist as she shakes her head.
âI had no idea Iris could do that. I just⊠the moment she arrived in the palace, she was so lovely, you know? She was always a little reserved, and liked to keep to herself, but I never wouldâve guessed. I truly thought she was a good friend of mine, and now I have no idea who she really is.â
âNeither did I.â
âHow are you, though? And please, tell me the truth. You do not need to pretend all is well.â
You shrug half-heartedly. âI am the Crown Princeâs wife. I must learn to be strong.â
âYou mustnât torture yourself any longer,â she licks her lips, chuckling without a trace of humor in it. âAlthough I do not blame you for staying in a marriage without love,â she smiled sadly, holding your hand firmer where it sat on her lap. âWhat do you plan to do?â
âI will divorce him,â you announced, and finally saying it loud felt different than just having the thought float in your head. It now felt like a reality. A choice you had to be firm in making. Licking your lips, you couldnât help but glance at the beautiful wedding ring sitting on your finger â how just like your marriage, it is sparkling yet meaningless.
Leaving him would be the right choice. It would not mean you were weak.
âOnce I meet with Kitaâs mother and work our way around the law⊠Iâm going to leave him. If it is a proper marriage he wants, then it is the one thing he will not get,â braving to look her in the eyes, you force a determined smile. âI believe it is the right thing to do, Your Highness. I must pick my battles wisely.â
âI understand, and I support you if this is what you want to do.â
âThank you, Princess.â
âAlthoughâŠâ
âAlthough?â
âI still find it hard to believe,â she quipped, momentarily letting go of your hand as she stood up, pacing around the room. Her dark hair, neatly braided and adorned with headpieces, slowly started falling into curled pieces around her delicate face with how fast sheâd been pacing. Almost as if her feet couldnât quite keep up with her thoughts. âIris and Kiyoomi had been married for five years, and Tooru told me theyâd loved each other long before then. I am aware I am not the best at reading the room, but surely I am not so foolish to miss the love in their eyes. I would have known, Your Highness, I swear.â
You smile, confused. âI⊠am not sure I understand what you mean.â
âI mean Iris never looked in love,â she reiterated. âGranted, she was never affectionate with Kiyoomi, so that much is clear, but with the Crown Prince? They barely even speak to each other.â
âYou couldnât have known if they did spend time together,â you told her as softly as you could, âI heard they often hid in Belleview Manor, away from the eyes of the public.â
âBut I live here,â she argued, and you stopped trying to butt in. For such a small thing, you had already learned once Maiko had her head set on something, almost nothing could stop her. âI live in Honor Hall, just five minutes away from them! I could have heard something. And on the few times I do see them together, Iris had always seemed⊠walled off. If Rintaro was able to display his affections openly, Iris was not the same. That night you werenât at the house, they did not seem like a happy couple to me.â
âWhat are you talking about?â
Maiko shook her head again, causing more curls to loosen. âThey seemed familiar with each other, but not intimate. It was almost as if they were lovers purely in the bedroom, but they couldnât have known each otherâs heart,â her eyes lit up, before it dimmed again when she took in your somber expression. âI do not mean to give you false hope, Princess, but believe me. I know a man in love when I see one, and it is not the Crown Prince with Iris. But⊠but when you were not married yet, everyone could tell the Crown Prince smiled more. He laughed often, too, and he even spent more time with his brothers.â
âWell, that is only natural. He has a lot of siblings. Of course he would enjoy their company.â
âNo, no, you do not understand, Princess. The Crown Prince⊠didnât grow up that way,â she bit her lip, and then scooted next to you. âAs the only son of the King and Queen, he was already more important than the rest. Because of that, he was raised differently â away and isolated from his brothers. He was always tutored alone, and never played with the other Princes. He spent his childhood locked up in his study, but then the Queen allowed him to attend regular school, and when he graduated⊠he met you. And I swear, he was different then.â
âBecause he already met her,â you remarked, hoping she would stop already. Rintaro does not love you. âHeâd become happier because Iris was already in his life.â
âI went to the same school with them; grew up with them. I had crushed on Prince Tooru for so long that I followed wherever he went, and where Tooru was, the Crown Prince would follow. They were born just months apart. And Iris never made the Crown Prince look⊠lookâŠâ
âLook what?â
âLook content,â she finally supplied. âBut when the Crown Prince introduced you to us, he had this look on his face. When you spoke to others, he would always be looking at you, listening to your every word. Even when you were not in the same room, he would speak fondly of you. And he even once told me he still could not believe someone as precious as you had been attending the same lousy balls heâd been enduring all his life. He said that if he had met you earlier, he might have never skipped out attending the dances.â
âI donât know,â your lips trembled, âI do not know what to do, Princess. Hearing of this does not make it any better.â
âI know, and Iâm sorry, but you must understand,â she squeezed your hand, desperation evident in her tone. âYour husband looks at you the way I wished mine would at me. He may say otherwise, but his eyes cannot lie. He softens when you are around, Princess. That night you did not return home at Greenville, the Crown Prince could not sleep at all. And these past few daysâŠâ
âI believe that is enough. I do not wish to hear how he spent his nights at Belleview.â
âHe didnât, Your Highness. The Crown Prince has never even spoken to Iris ever since we returned from your honeymoon.â
Rintaro could count the number of things pissing him off with one hand.
One: You had barely acknowledged his existence the past few days.
Two: Iris wouldnât stop pulling him into dark, secluded corners in the Castle each time she chanced upon him. Two-point-five: She couldnât understand he was not in the mood for another one of their trysts.
Three: Kiyoomi skipped another meeting concerning Itachiyama again.
Seriously, Rintaro understood being a Prince was tiresome work. It was not as grandiose as the tabloids made it out to be. Even in his sleep, he sometimes dreamt of paperwork, or he would wake up in the middle of the night with his hands signing off imaginary papers. The pressure was tougher on Kiyoomi, too, because he was expected to be ready to take after Wakatoshi at any time he even faltered â note: the First Prince never did â and to also act as representative for the other territory thanks to his birthright. But his brother was an hermit, and seemed to fear the sunlight, considering he never left his quarters. Or on the rare occasions he did, he would be hiding away in other countries doing who knows what.
He had just finished a meeting with some of the territory leaders regarding a public complaint that the price of goods had gone up, and some daily necessities were now ridiculously overpriced. One of the main suppliers of good livestock and coconuts, Itachiyama, made it even more expensive â not for any good reason, just that their leader loved to remind Inarizaki constantly that they needed him more than he needed the monarchy.
His goading affected his people, and Rintaro has had enough. Kiyoomi could at least try to pretend to be interested in the meetings. Out of all the nine princes, Kiyoomi was the most influential for being a half-blood. The Itachiyama president adored him. He wouldnât have had to struggle negotiating for prices had he been doing his work. He was the damned mediator between the two countries, for goodnessâ sake!
And to make it all worse, his life did not get any better outside the meeting rooms.
No, because his wife was intent on acting like he did not exist. And on the few times he did manage to be in the same space as you without you running off, you always looked through him. Like he wasnât even a real person. As if he was just an apparition, a ghost in your mind that you could overlook if you tried hard enough.
He already knew you wouldnât be in your quarters once he returned, but Rintaro still couldnât help the pang of disappointment washing over him. He chose you to be his future Queen for many reasons, one of them being your wisdom in these kinds of things. You just needed a little encouragement to speak up, but Rintaro was confident you would make a great leader. You had genuine care for your people. You would have been able to help him make the best decisions for everybody â if you would just listen to him. Wasnât that how marriages work? To share the burden of the Crown together? The Crown was too heavy for one person alone, which is why Kings cannot be crowned without their Queens.
Rintaro couldnât do it alone. Each day was becoming more challenging for him, and he so desperately wished he could discuss the countryâs future with you. He would feel more confident in his choices. He would be more reassured that he was doing the right thing, but it seemed that all he knew how to do lately was fuck everything up.
On his way back, Rintaro stopped trying to look regal. He let his shoulders slump and ran his fingers through his hair again. The gel be damned. Loosening his tie, he rolled his shoulders back and winced at how stiff his back was. Sitting on his ass all day long, having to listen to old men argue back and forth over money, and simultaneously having to deal with a marriage heâd already screwed over â Rintaro just wanted to disappear.
He wanted to return to Greenville.
It was peaceful there. People minded their own business, everyone had their own purpose and reason for waking up each day and there, he could just be himself. Not the Crown Prince, not a young man who had to hurt you for the sake of the throne. He could just⊠be free.
âYour Highness,â a servant bowed in front of him, keeping a respectful distance but enough to let him know he needed his attention.
âGood evening,â he greeted back, âHave you seen my wife?â
âHer Highness was with Princess Maiko this morning. Last I heard, she has not left the Palace, at all.â
âI see,â Rintaro was already moving towards Honor Hall before his feet could register it. It was a good twenty minute walk, and the chances of running into Iris werenât miniscule, but it would be worth it. He could use some fresh air, anyway. And he figured with Maiko around, you would be less opposed to spending the evening with him â until he realized Maiko must have known everything, too. How he manipulated you, and left you in the middle of nowhere.
On second thought, having two Princesses who clearly did not welcome him would not make for a great night.
âMy Prince!â
Rintaro stopped on his tracks. He had a split second to school his expression to surprise â the good kind â when he came face to face with the last woman he wanted to see.
âMother,â he greeted, taking her gloved hand and pressing a kiss to her knuckles whilst she fanned herself. âI wasnât informed you would be visiting.â
She waved her fan around. âOh, I had to nearly knock down the guards when they wouldnât let me in, but I had to see my daughter. I heard from the news that you came home too early. Well, what is wrong? Is she sick? Does she not like the countryside? Or perhaps there was an emergency you had to attend to?â fanning herself harder, Rintaroâs hand wound at the small of her back to guide the older woman into a nearby seat. âShe hasnât answered any of my calls, and I am worried, my son.â
âYour concern for her will put her at ease, Iâm certain,â he reassured, swallowing the uncomfortable lump growing in his throat. âThis is just⊠a difficult time for us, Mother. I fear Her Highness is having doubts about our marriage once she saw how overwhelming the Crown could be. She simply wished to return home because she felt there were things to be done here.â
Your mother sighed and shook her head. âMy poor daughter. She always felt the need to prove her worth by working herself to death,â spinning to face him, she pointed her fan in his direction â which would be considered a threat to the Crown Prince, but she was his motherâinâlaw. Her presence itself was a threat to his life. âPromise me you wonât let her exhaust herself, son. Promise me youâll take care of her.â
âShe is in good hands, Mother, I promise you this.â
Pleased with him, your mother beamed. âI was also⊠Well, I may be crossing the line, but now that you tell me my poor daughter is anxious about her royal duties, I was planning to hold a ball in her honor. A welcoming ball for the new Princess, of sorts. It should help her integrate into your world better, but still with the comfort of our support.â
âA ball sounds lovely. We can hold it anytime as we are still in our honeymoon period and she will be free for quite some time.â
âThat is perfect! I will make the arrangements, then.â
Wearing his best Prince Charming smile, even if he was anything but, Rintaro found himself mindlessly agreeing to everything your mother wanted. He would have to squeeze all these events in his already hectic schedule, but he was not complaining. She was right. You deserved to relax and enjoy yourself. He should know best that having royal titles did not promise a life of gallivanting and endless tea parties. Once your mother had exhausted herself from all the planning, Rintaro escorted her out to the palace entrance, stopping only when your figure appeared from the corner.
Finally, you were looking at him.
But with a glare.
Well, he supposed beggars couldnât be choosers.
âYou are a far better actor than I give you credit for â lying to my mother like that.â
âI did not mean to.â
You rolled your eyes, and Rintaro bit his lip. Cute, he thought, but he would never say it out loud. He would simply enjoy the fact you did not push him away, or walk away as if you were scalded when he started walking next to you. For a moment, everything almost seemed normal. Minus the extreme glaring, of course.
âSurely. Itâs not like telling her you manipulated me for the past two years was on your to-do list.â
âDo not use that tone on me.â
âI will speak with you however I wish. You do not get to tell me what to do.â
âYou are right; I cannot tell you what to do, so do as you please, then,â he surrendered, and you must be surprised by how he easily gave in from the way you froze. Glaring harder, Rintaro bit his cheek, tilting his head to the side as he gazed upon your pretty face. And oh, how badly he wanted to smooth that frown youâre wearing. âI missed you. I have not seen you all day long.â
âMust have been a lovely day for you, then.â
It was hell, actually, was what he wanted to say, but even that did not seem enough to articulate what he truly felt. I missed you, and Iâm sorry I hurt you. Please sleep on the same bed with me again. I want to hold you all night long, and your scent calms me. But instead, all that comes out of his mouth was, âIt was not lovely at all.â
âHmm. Iâm not Iris.â
âNo, you arenât.â
He agreed wholeheartedly â you were not his lover. Iris would not argue with him like this; in fact, they never argued at all. Whenever they had misunderstandings, they resolved it by taking out their frustrations on the bedroom, and the next day, all would be forgiven and forgotten. It was easier with Iris, in some ways, because with you he actually had to use his words, and he had to say the right ones. Both of which he wasnât good at, but would try his very best anyway.
âI heard you spent the day with Maiko. How was it? Did you two have fun?â
âAs fun as two women suffering at the hands of men who despise them could have.â
Rintaro took a larger step to stand in front of you, his eyes narrowed into slits. âI do not despise you.â
âReally? You made me feel otherwise.â
Sighing, he ran his hands through his hair again, feeling much more exhausted than he did after the meetings ended. âYou do not have to make this so difficult, you know. I am trying to fix this.â
The laugh you let out is sardonic, teetering on the edges of borderline angry. But he would take it â because arguments with you were better than having you ignore him, and he would take a thousand more arguments if it meant you talked. He would consume your wrath over your coldness every other day. Even when you cross your arms and look at him like he was the most vile creature to ever walk the Earth â because your eyes are on him, and in that moment, in the middle of another of a hundred hallways in his Palace, there was no one else but you and him. A husband and his wife. A Prince and his Princess.
âOh, are you now? Because last time I checked, you were still in love with someone else, and Iâm still nothing but a pawn in your silly game.â
âI may be in love with someone else, but it was you who I couldnât get off my mind.â
âIs that supposed to make my heart flutter?â
You reel back as if burnt, and Rintarou couldnât fathom why your expression hurt him so much. As if his declaration, his vulnerability, of being putty in your hands repulsed you instead of excited you. However, he refused to show he hung desperately to your every word, refused to admit that you held all the power in your hands, not him. So, he plays it off, and flirtingly lifts a brow just to get you even more riled up.
âI was hoping it would.â
âWhatever it is youâre planning, Rintaro, you wonât win.â
His eyes darkened. Suddenly, all self-restraint he previously had had been thrown out the window. The urge to press his lips to you â yes, those same lips scowling at him â becomes all too consuming. He fools himself into taking the heat in your eyes as desire instead of anger. And he takes one step forward, two, then three, until your back hits the wall and his large frame prevents you from escaping. He liked you best here, he realized, under his mercy and staring up at him with your soft lips, pliant and open to release a gasp when he leans in. Closer, closer, only for his lips to meet the skin of your cheek.
Rintaro stifled a disappointed groan.
Masking it with a chuckle, he trailed his lips down your cheek and to your jawline, all the way until heâs inhaling your intoxicating scent â he wants your damned perfume to stick to his skin for days to come so everyone in the Palace knows he is yours. And like a flower, you bloom only to him. Craning your neck and pushing your chest upwards to his despite your resistance, breathing hard and heavy to let him know he wasnât the only one affected by this.
And by the Gods, he wanted nothing more than to take you in this wall right here and then.
Brushing his lips just above your pulse point, Rintaro smiled. Your heart was beating a mile a minute, and he was certain his was, too, when you began to crumple his shirt in your hands. âI never knew my name could sound so important without the titles attached to it.â
âWhâwhat?â your query came out breathily. Not that he could blame you, for his words have also begun to sound more like a whisper.
âRintaro,â he echoed, nosing your neck to greedily take in more of your scent. If not on his skin, then he will settle for the evidence of you all over his clothes â and damned the servants who dared wash his dress shirt. âNot Prince, not Your Highness. Just Rintaro. It makes me feel like⊠it is just you and I, husband and wife, as simple as that,â you draw in another gasp just as his fingers start ghosting over your waist, fighting the urge to pin you in place, or to just hold you delicately because he knew heâd broken you enough. Rintaro felt weak, his head dropping in the column of your shoulder. âI truly did miss you. And I do not like how I spent many nights, in our bed, alone.â
âYou do not deserve to share a bed with me.â
âI know,â he lamented, and that firm resolve of keeping him at a distance was enough to wake him up. Pushing himself off of you, Rintaro took a solid minute to admire you like this â lips parted, expectant for a kiss, and skin flushed with a thin layer of sweat, with eyes so bewildered he could see himself clearly in the reflection â that he was just a man now, and not really the husband you wanted him to be. Once he had his fill, Rintaro smoothed down the wrinkles you fisted in his shirt and took a step back. âBut you do not deserve to sleep in just a couch. Take the bed tonight. I will sleep outside.â
âBut thatâsââ
âIâm the one who fucked up,â he smirked, sarcasm dripping from his face, âSo I should be the one sleeping uncomfortably. I know I cannot tell you what to do, and neither do I plan on ordering you around, but this is the one thing you cannot argue with me on. You will take the bed. Understand?â
âYes.â
âYes, what?â
âYes, Your Highness.â
Back to titles. Back to formality. Back to reality.
âGood girl,â he murmured absentmindedly, nodding in the direction of your bedroom. âLet us head back to our quarters. Iâm buying you a new dress for the ball first thing in the morning.â
To say Rintaro had changed would be an understatement.
He was a completely different person than your husband in the honeymoon. It was as if⊠last nightâs intimate encounter had brought him back to the Rintaro you fell in love with, but this time it felt different. He felt more intense. Maybe it was the fact that his secrets were now laid out in the open, which could mean his attentive actions toward you no longer held the purpose of winning you over. Maybe now he truly just wanted to spend time with you because he could.
Cancelling his plans for the day, heâd told the servants you were going out shopping, and oh, what a cunning, devilish Prince he is. He knew you wouldnât be able to keep your hands off of him out in public. With so many eyes watching, you spent nearly every second of the day with your arms looped around his, laughing and smiling at every word he said, and not daring to keep your eyes off him lest someone took a photographed and headlined it âNewly Married Royal Couple Having Their First Loversâ Spat In Public.â No. No, that would be catastrophic. The Queen would be furious.
Here, in public, you were forced to act sweet and touchy with him, to which the stupid Crown Prince basked in as he led you from boutique to boutique. He complimented you on everything, even when you wore a hideous bright orange gown that made even the designer flinch. But in Rintaroâs eyes, you were simply mesmerizing. He even got a suit that matched all of your dresses, claiming that everyone should know he was married to you. Everyone already knew that â the whole world knew â but you didnât want to burst his bubble.
Aside from having a day off, your husband genuinely did seem to be doing things other than paperwork.
You stopped being kind once you entered the car, however, when the windows had rolled up and you had both stopped waving to the people. Here, it was just the driver and the both of you, and the driver knew better than to comment on whatever happened, anyway. Sighing, you scooted to the other end of the seat, prying yourself off of Rintaroâs tight grip around your waist.
âDrop the act.â
âWhat act?â
âOh, please,â you scoffed, taking off your gloves and folding them neatly in your lap. âWe are in the privacy of our car. You neednât pretend any longer.â
âWho said I was pretending?â
You looked at him dead in the eye. âYou are not fooling anyone. This was all a PR act â you did not actually mean whatever it is you said to me out there, but worry not. Iâll get out of your hair and divorce you â surely that will make everything easier.â
The way Rintaroâs eyes nearly popped out of his head would be comical if he didnât look so scared. In a flash, your husband crossed the distance and sat next to you, his hurried movements causing his bangs to fall into his eyes. His large hands began to engulf yours, and you suck in a breath â without the gloves, it felt more intimate. âWhat divorce?â he chuckled nervously, brushing his lips over your bare knuckles. It was the faintest of touches, only done to appease you, but it still didnât stop the bolt of heat coursing through your thighs. Gods, it was just so hard trying to stay mad at him.
âYou know thatâs impossible. Royal marriages are forever. Look, if you truly wish to divorce me, fine. But you know you will have to help me become King first. Once I am crowned, I can write a new law that says royal couples can be separated.â
âYou are despicable.â
âI am,â he whined. Whined! Seriously, who was this man? âBut I promise you, if you help me, I will let you go. Look, Iâll even find a highâranking nobleman for you. The best of the best. You wouldnât have to be lonely anymore. Just⊠donât ever mention divorce to me right now. I wonât let you.â
Scoffing, you pull your hands back from his heavenly lips. âYou seriously think after everything, loneliness is somehow my biggest issue?â Rintaro opened his mouth to retort, but you shook your head, making yourself small between him and the window seat. You hated it, how helpless you felt, from wanting his touch to being burnt by it. You hated it even more how you couldnât look him in the eye as you mumbled, âHave you ever thought that maybe I just want to forget you?â
âI do not want you to,â he breathed out, and your eyes snapped shut when you felt his fingers brush over your cheeks. âBut I am not so selfish to deprive you of a good thing. You will find someone who can love you better than I could.â
Your heart fell.
âWell, that would be easy. You never loved me to begin with.â
The Crown Prince never spoke again. You both mulled over your silences as you arrived back at the Palace, heading into the bathroom to do your nightly routines. Rintaro was to your left, taking out his razor blade and shaving foam while you stood to his right, lathering on your cleanser and toner. Thankfully, the silence did not feel as heavy as it did on the ride back home, but it was still far from being comfortable. It was only after youâd moisturized and turned to leave the room that Rintaro caught your wrist, glancing down at you with a pleading expression.
âPlease. Can we stop fighting? I thought today was fun. Let us not end it hating each other.â
âIâm sorry, Your Highness, if I ruined your precious day,â you snapped, leaning back to examine how he missed a spot below his jaw. A slight stubble was visible, but you had to stop your hand from reaching out to him. You sighed. âAll this space in the Palace and they couldnât give us separate bathrooms?â
âTraditionally, royal married couples slept in separate rooms. Everything was separate, too, including bathrooms,â he gestured around you, âPerhaps you wouldâve liked the old ways.â
Screw it. The small talk is the most awkward thing you have ever experienced.
ââŠYou missed a spot,â you finally mumbled, taking his razor from him and gesturing for him to crouch down so you can reach. âDo you want me to finish it?â
Rintaro, despite his surprise, nodded and obeyed. It must have been uncomfortable for him to slouch, but he did so without complaints. He let you shave him as you saw fit, turning his head side to side, lathering on more foam, and you watched as his shoulders visibly deflated. Eyes fluttering close, Rintaro sighed, the tips of his fingers gingerly tracing circles as they laid beside your hips.
âYou will take the bed as discussed,â he reminded, âYou will not argue with me on this.â
âOkay,â you answered, because you, too, had no energy for more arguments. Once you were done with him, you wiped off the rest of the foam with a warm, wet towel. You both left the bathroom and went your separate ways â you to your kingâsized bed, and him just outside the bedroom and into the lounge room, where you spent the past few nights sleeping. You realized he must not be sleeping well from it because of his large frame, yet Rintaro did not seem to mind.
Just as he was about to close the door, he lingered for a few beats.
âThank you for going along the happily married couple act today,â he said, lifting his gaze from the carpeted floors to gaze into your eyes. âAnd for the record, I meant it when I said you looked beautiful.â
Then he turned, and swiftly closed the door, leaving you to be with your thoughts â all filled of him.
It didnât help that the sheets and pillows still lingered with his scent.
You had your upcoming ball to thank for distracting you from your confusing feelings for your husband. That in itself was such a ridiculous statement, but one that ringed true. After Rintaroâs surprising gentleness, and the revelation from Maiko that he hadnât spoken at all with Iris, you were now in a dangerous zone called Getting Your Hopes Up. Truly, you should know better. You had known Rintaro for years to know he could be effortlessly charming. He could have you wrapped tight around his finger, smiling like a lovesick fool, only for him to break your heart once more.
If not for that cold, hard truth, you would have invited him to bed with you that night. It seemed too tempting. It felt like the right thing to do. But you didnât, and you were glad you held back on your desire, because you werenât sure you could handle another heartbreak.
Especially because these past few days made you realize one thing â that you were still in love with him. The next morning, you found yourself wishing you had woken up next to him, and that was enough to make you avoid your husband all over again. And much to your disappointment, Rintaro stopped trying to chase after you, too, after countless rejections on your part. He had kept his distance, and only spoke with you momentarily when you arrived at your motherâs ball and had to exchange niceties with everyone.
After that, your husband excused himself and spoke with his brothers, but not after your parents couldnât stop cooing at how adorable you and the Crown Prince were. He handled it with grace; kissing your cheek and thanking them for raising such a wonderful daughter. But the moment your parents became occupied with welcoming other guests, you were now left to entertain the other women in the ball.
Until the music began playing.
Until your song reverberated all across the room.
âThis is the song you and the Crown Prince danced to the night you met,â your mother whispered beside you, giggling in your ear. âI requested it specifically for this night. Enjoy the dance with your husband. Heâs already waiting.â
True to her word, you could feel Rintaroâs heated gaze on you from across the room. Heâd stopped speaking with his brothers â the twins smirking beside him, Akaashi smiling at you softly, Tobio waving enthusiastically while nursing a glass of wine, and Kita firmly hovering from the walls with a concerned frown. Not that you paid attention to them. Your gaze was held by your husband and him only, bewitched as he started walking forward. The crowed parted for him like a true Prince until nothing stood in his way. Everyone smiled, giggling behind their gloves at the apparent âromance in the air.â Beside you, your mother pushed you encouragingly, and you could feel everyoneâs eyes on you, waiting to see if you would take the Crown Princeâs outstretched hands.
âMy love,â he whispered above your gloved hands, and your heart skipped a beat. He didnât call you Princess, or Your Highness. You knew it was for the sake of keeping appearances, but by the Gods, you loved him. You were so hopelessly in love with your husband that you placed your heart in his hands once more, silently pleading with him not to break it as he led you in the middle of the dance floor. âMay I have this dance?â
âYes,â you breathed out, your hand resting on his shoulder as naturally as his arms came to your waist. The exact same movements from the night you first met, with the same song, but with your love for him stronger tonight than it did when you first laid your eyes on him.
This time, you danced as man and wife, and you recalled his words from the other day.
How there were moments it seemed so simple â where there were no titles, just you and him, having this dance like it was the most natural, inexplicable thing in this world.
The chord struck. The crowd parted. He took the first step in the dance, and you took a step back. Not once did you tear your gaze away from him, happily drowning in the depths of his hazel eyes you could look at forever. And isnât that what youâd always wanted? To spend a lifetime with him, to grow old together. It would have been so easy if it werenât for â
âDonât think about anything else,â your husband shook his head lightly, âJust enjoy this moment. Tonight, there is only you and I.â
âOkay,â you found yourself nodding, and his grip on your waist tightened for a second. âJust you and I.â
Rintaroâs lips curled into the faintest of smiles. âJust you and I.â
You and him in those moments â you felt immortal. Like nothing could stand in your way. Or perhaps you could die tonight, and you would die happy. Because you were in your husbandâs arms, and he was looking at you and only you, murmuring how you were becoming more and more beautiful with each passing day. You were melting in his arms, like goo. Like pudding. And he was strong enough to catch you, to brush his nose against yours at each dip, or letting his lips linger on your forehead each time you came back to him with each spin.
But happy moments never lasted long enough, and soon the rotations were beginning. More couples have joined the dance floor. Through one spin, you caught sight of Tooru and Maiko. Neither of them looked happy, but Tooru visibly brightened when he caught your eye, and shamelessly winked. On the other side of the room danced Iris and Kiyoomi, with the latter looking so nauseous you worried dinner would be spilled on your motherâs floor. And then too soon, Rintaroâs hands were leaving yours as he moved to the nearest dance partner, and you were caught by a pair of strong, muscled arms.
âMy turn,â Tooru teased, a grin now on his handsome face as he nudged his head in Rintaroâs direction. He was now dancing with your mother, and you could tell, even from this distance, the smile he wore was genuine. âShould I beat him up?â
You chuckled, throwing your head back. Despite his jokes and jabs, Prince Tooru was a surprisingly great dancer â less stiff than Rintaro, and more confident in his receiving when you spun and dipped. But dancing with him did not feel the same. There was no passion, no yearning, no longing â just the lighthearted air of good humor and his calming nature.
âI donât think beating the Crown Prince up would be a very wise decision.â
âIndeed, but I was never the Prince known for making wise decisions. That would be more Shinsukeâs forte,â he snorted, and the song reached a part for another rotation. However, Tooru refused to let you go and intentionally spun you away from what was supposed to be your next dance partner. Out of shock, you slapped his chest, and his broad chest rumbled with laughter.
âYour Highness! That was unbelievably rude!â
âAs I have said,â you both laughed when he spun you again, âI am not the Prince known to be socially adept.â
You bent over in giggles, your head resting on his chest as you danced more throughout the night. Your feet were getting tired, but your mother was right â this was a night to enjoy. You danced to your heartâs content, exchanging jokes with the handsome Fifth Prince until you craned your neck to the side, only to be stopped by Prince Tooruâs large hand. This time, he no longer smiled as he gazed upon the dancing partners behind you, and your skin turned cold.
You had a feeling you knew exactly why.
âDonât look. You wonât like what youâll see.â
Nodding, you pursed your lips and forced a smile at him. âItâs okay, Princess,â he comforted, âJust look at me. You need not concern yourself with others.â
So you danced, and danced, until you could hear your father pleading with the Fifth Prince to give his daughter back because he didnât get a chance to have a dance with you yet. Reluctantly, Tooru handed you over to your father, but not without a faux frown.
âThat was a lovely dance, Your Highness. I wish we couldâve danced more.â
âI think we danced enough.â
Tooruâs smile was guarded; secretive. âIâm afraid it was not enough.â
You danced with your father next. And it was lovely, seeing him up close with all his smile lines and wrinkles. You missed him so, dearly, and he felt the same way. It hurt having to lie to him when he asked how you were settling in the Palace, but you didnât want to concern him with your personal matters, and for some reason, it didnât sit well with you if your father disliked Rintaro. So you swallowed your discomfort down and told him everything was great â silently wishing he wouldnât pry further. He didnât. And when the song slowed, your father kissed you on the cheek before letting you meet with your next dancing partner.
Stood in front of you was a great wall of what could only be described as majestic. Dressed in white with gold ornaments, Prince Kiyoomiâs curls framed his handsome face beautifully. You had been so accustomed seeing him in more comfortable clothing, and in the privacy of his own home, that seeing him out here in society, it reminded you that he, too, was a Prince.
The Second Prince â the would have been next King should Ushijima and Rintaro falter.
âMy Prince.â
âPrincess,â he bowed, taking your hand in his as you made your way back to the dance floor. The music played again, this time louder, and the Prince leaned down until his lips were brushing against the shell of your ear. You repressed a gasp, unable to help yourself from digging your nails into his palm when you were greeted by how good he smelled â like mint, new leather, and pine. It also dawned on you how tall and firm the Prince was â perhaps taller and more muscular than Rintaro.
âYâYes, Your Highness?â
âRemind me to thank your mother for extending her invites to the forgotten Prince. Imagine my shock when I saw her invitation letter this morning.â
You chuckled nervously, thankful that he had now slightly tilted his head back. âI hardly doubt you are a forgotten prince.â
He snorted, effortlessly spinning you with one hand. âItâs not like I do my duties to begin with. I wouldnât be surprised if I truly was forgotten,â distracted by his scent, you unknowingly stepped on the hem of your dress and slipped backwards. A scream nearly tore out your throat when the Princeâs large hands cupped the small of your back, your chest pressed to his and his curls brushing against your cheeks as he held you close. âCareful.â
âThâthank you.â
You were a mess after that. You were never the best dancer, but something about being in the older Princeâs presence made you extra nervous. If he noticed, he didnât comment on it. He simply danced with grace, and hid his grimace well each time you stepped on his toes. He had also convinced you to stop apologizing every time you did, and by the time the dance was over, you were more than ready to disappear.
âThank you for the dance, my Prince,â you bowed, words hurried, âI shall see youââ
âKiyoomi!â a woman appeared out of nowhere, her thick, dark curls pinned up beautifully with some loose strands swaying in time with her hips. She had the same moles as Kiyoomi, and you watched, entranced, as the older woman wrapped her arm casually around the prince. The two shared a silent conversation with their eyes before Kiyoomi glanced at you, and the woman followed his line of sight. âOh! Your Highness. Greetings. I donât believe I have introduced myself before â Iâm Kanami; Kiyoomiâs mother.â
You smiled at her, politely taking her hand as she extracted herself from her sonâs arms and taken to draping herself all over you. Discomfort must be written all over your face, because the Second Prince sent an apologetic smile your way.
âIt is an honor to meet you, Miss Kanami. Are you enjoying the night so far? The travel all the way from Itachiyama must have been exhausting.â
âOh, it was, but itâs all worth it now that weâve met again!â she squealed, and you paled.
âWe have met before?â
Just as she nodded and went about to retelling this soâcalled meeting, Iris popped up behind Kiyoomi, her smile stiff as she regarded Kanami. Instantly, your mood soured. She hadnât spoken to you at all tonight, which you were thankful, but something about the thought of her dancing with your husband, and probably being suggestive while at it had your blood boiling.
âMother! Such a shock seeing you here. I wasnât aware you were invited.â
Kanami barely glanced her way, her dark, curious eyes still on your face.
âHello, Iris, and itâs Miss Sakusa, dear,â she corrected, her enthusiastic smile momentarily fading into a scowl before it returned. âSay, Your Highness, since youâre still on your honeymoon period â and Iâve heard your dear husband is too busy these days â would you want to come visit Itachiyama with me? I would be honored to be your host. It will also be a great opportunity to learn more about your Princess duties and politics!â leaning closer, she whispered behind her gloves, although her words were loud enough to be heard by Prince Tooru and Iris. âAlthough if I will be honest, politics does not interest me in the least bit.â
Your mouth fell open and closed, unsure of what to say, until you settled on chuckling and patting her hand wrapped around your arm. âI⊠Thank you for invitation, Kanami. I am most tempted to see your beautiful country, but Princess Iris should be the one visiting her territory, should she not?â
Kanami scrunched her nose.âThe Princess never grew up in Itachiyama. She would be just as clueless as you. Besides, I have always wanted to invite you over ever since you had Kiyoomi as your last dance on your eighteenth birthday!â
âHe⊠was?â
âHe was! Donât you remember, dear?â she turned to Kiyoomi, who looked like he wanted the floor to open up and swallow him already. But judging by his reaction, it seemed true â Kiyoomi was your last dance on your debut ball. âWell, in that case, I was always fond of you. I may be crossing the line here, but it was always a famous royal saying that whoever was your last dance on your debutante ball was your destined lover.â
#suna rintaro x reader#suna x reader#suna rintarou angst#suna x yn#haikyuu x reader#suna rintarou x reader#rintaro suna x reader#kiyoomi x reader#sakusa x reader#sakusa kiyoomi x reader#sakusa x reader fluff#kiyoomi sakusa x you#suna x you#tooru oikawa x reader#oikawa tooru x reader#suna rintarĆ x reader#suna rintarĆ x you#series: dusk till dawn
449 notes
·
View notes
Text
Did Laios have a plan
... when he made his deal with the Lion? How much of it was intentional and how much of it was out of his control?
Well. If I'm being honest I don't really want to try and provide a definitive answer to that question, because I think the ambiguity is, itself, part of the story. I've gone back and forth a few times myself, and I don't think either category - "fully intentional" or "fully coincidence" - is entirely true.
That being said, I would like to point out a few things that I've seen taken for granted as true. Things that, imo, are much more about the character's perspective, or about what the character WANTS people to think (well, that's really just the Winged Lion).
Consider this not exactly an argument for "Laios masterminded everything from the start and saved the world with his cunning," but more... "Laios considered what he was doing more than people give him credit for." Make sense?
Alright then, let's go:
So to start with, I want to show every time (that I could find, at least) that the question of 'does Laios have a plan' gets brought up. This is specifically after his Ultimate Monster Form is revealed, to be clear - the question isn't about if he has a plan in general, it is if he has/had a plan when he made this specific deal with the Lion.
Here they are:
-
-
You'll notice, in all of these instances, there never really is an answer given to the question. Either because there is no way to get one, or, with Kabru at the end there, because he explicitly doesn't let Laios answer. There's even a bit of an arc here: we start with a sort of desperate 'I've mostly given up but maybe this isn't as bad as it looks,' then get a more optimistic 'maybe we really are saved,' and finally end on 'it all worked out in the end, so we maybe don't need to know.'
But, as much as there is some genuine growth in Kabru's 'accept the outcome, rather than dissecting the truth,' I also think it says a lot more about him than about Laios. Kabru is the one trying to handle his questions and his uncertainty - as he said, he wants to confirm his judgement of character. He wants to feel like he had control over things.
And he lets that go! But he also doesn't actually get the truth, either, and his implied assumption here (that Laios, the wide-eyed monster-lover, probably just followed his desires), still relies on his judgements and assumptions about Laios.
But okay, these bits are all focused on the characters theorizing about Laios. How about we look at the character who actually tells us the facts ("facts"): the Winged Lion.
The Winged Lion has quite a bit to say about Laios and his monster form.
He says that Laios hates humanity, and would rather be a monster
I've talked about this a bit already, but the Lion makes a lot of claims and assumptions about Laios that aren't necessarily true.
First of all, let's just make sure we clearly establish that the Lion is being manipulative here. That may seem obvious, but it's important to understand that there is a difference between 'the truth' and 'a version of the truth specifically framed to prey upon your deepest shame and insecurities about what you really want.'
To point out a few quick-and-dirty contradictions here:
If Laios really hated all other humans, then the Lion wouldn't hinge so many of his other arguments on Laios' love for Falin and his friends.
the Lion claims that Laios "[doesn't] even care enough about the future of [the] world to express an opinion about it," even though Laios has literally expressed opinions on what he wants for the world, to the Lion's face.
In general, the Lion does not make a distinction between urges and choices (see, for instance: him using Marcille's subconscious fear of the canaries as a way to keep her from stopping the monsters from attacking in chapter 86).
I'm not saying there is not a piece of truth here, but also... we are not our darkest thoughts, and we especially are not those thoughts as defined by someone who wants to hurt and control us.
But letâs move on to the stuff the Lion claims about Laios once he has been turned into his monster form.
2. He says that (or rather, acts like) Laios is under his control
The Lion really enjoys grandstanding about how Monster Laios is an ultimate tool he has control over. He gloats about making Laios fight the others, and has him smash through the magical barrier.
But smashing the barrier is kinda the only thing that Monster Laios actually does for the Lion. He doesn't attack anyone. He doesn't hurt his friends, despite Chilchuck thinking that Laios has "turned completely into a monster." And he certainly doesn't simply let the Lion go through with his plan to eat everyone.
This barrier smashing is actually an interesting and odd thing for Laios to have done specifically, so remember that one. I'll come back to it later.
But, yeah, to the original point... despite the Lion's dramatics, all that Monster Laios does is pose, smash up a magic barrier, and then eat him. Not exactly under his control.
AND SPEAKING OF EATING THE DEMON...
3. He frames Laios attacking and eating him as thoughtlessly violent
This one is pretty funny to me, and the Lion keeps it up for the whole scene. I'm not sure how much of this is his genuine understanding of the situation, and how much is him intentionally framing things in the most insulting manner, but like... truly. The ego involved in this. To see someone who has, multiple times, tried to stand against you - someone who has literally wished for your non-existence, to your face - to see this person attack you, specifically, and have your first reaction be 'huh, I guess he's a reckless weirdo to the core???'
Incredible stuff.
And this part, too:
He claims that Laios can't recognize anyone, that he's out of control. And yet, the Lion is the only person that gets eaten here. He is Laios' singular target.
Hell, Laios even specifically attacks one of the bodies that is actively hurting Chilchuck. I don't know if that was entirely intentional on Laios' part, but I do think it's notable.
The Lion torments Laios' friend, and when Laios does something that interrupts that action, the Lion reframes it as unhinged violence. I don't know, there's something here about the way that cruel people only talk about the things people do to resist them as violent, and ignore the violence that causes such resistance in the first place.
In any case, the main point is that the Lion insists on treating Laios like an unthinking animal during this fight, despite the fact that Laios is clearly trying to accomplish something here.
And what exactly is Laios trying to accomplish? Well, the Lion isn't entirely wrong. Laios is trying to eat something. He tells us as much.
And truly, everything Laios does as a monster points to this. He had a goal. And he accomplished it.
Let me back up a moment. I need to explain smashing the barrier.
So, Laios first starts considering how to kill the Lion when he is confronted with the fact that his only other choice would be to kill Marcille. Immediately and entirely discarding that solution, because of course he does, he tries to wrap his head around what defeating the Lion would even look like.
He clearly continues thinking about this, as a nearly identical conversation happens a few chapters later, when Laios is once again told that killing Marcille is the only way forward.
Only, this time, he's started to come up with an idea for how to do this impossible thing.
Harkening all the way back to the Living Armor chapter, Laios draws on the same lesson - if the Lion has made itself part of the world, if it has made itself into something alive, that means he can kill it. And eat it.
But there's an important extra detail to this. If he's going to try and kill (and eat) the Lion, he needs to strike when itâs vulnerable. He needs to strike when it's eating.
This is why he smashes through the barrier. Again, nothing else he does as a monster really benefits the Lion. He doesn't attack anyone else. The only command he obeys is to smash the barrier. Because the Lion has to think he has won for Laios to be able to eat him.
Beat him. For Laios to be able to beat him.
The question of why Monster Laios wanted to eat the Lion is, I think, the most ambiguous part. Was he curious? Hungry? Did he fight for his own life, for his friends, or for all of humanity? Did he know how to win because he had planned everything from the start, or because he was driven by an unquenchable instinct to do whatever it took to survive?
I don't know that it is possible to say for sure. But I do know that the Lion underestimates Laios, through it all. He underestimates Laios as a human, and he underestimates Laios as a monster.
And in the end, after he is bested, even then I don't think the Lion ever gets Laios. I don't think he understands how much Laios means his words about the Lion being burdened by hunger...
or what Laios cares about most...
or what meaning there is in life, for him.
So I don't buy what the Lion is selling about Laios, generally speaking. I don't buy that Laios didn't ever know what he was doing, and I don't buy that he was nothing more than a hungry beast.
Well. I mean. He was a hungry beast. But he was a more than that too. He was the Devourer of All Things Horrible. And he didn't just happen into that title by chance.
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#laios touden#winged lion#dissecting how the Lion's negging works is a great exercise in understanding manipulation honestly#dungeon meshi spoilers#dunmeshi analysis
1K notes
·
View notes
Note
Could i ask for a Law x FemReader with the âaccidental kissâ prompt?, and if possible, could law have a crush on the reader if you decide to do this ask?
(Love your fics)
-anon
DESCRIPTION: Prompt: Accidental Kiss
WARNINGS:Â Fluff
CHARACTERS: Law
WORDS: 1,270
A/N:Â Hi there, thank you for this prompt based request. I hope you like what I came up with for this one.
*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*
MASTERLIST | PROMPT LIST
âââââââ
The chatter among the crew at the breakfast table was as lively as ever. The meals on the Polar Tang were always savoured for everyone to connect and enjoy the time together before everyone resigned themselves away to take on their tasks for the day. Youâd finished your meal but remained sitting, holding your mug of coffee close as you let the heat radiate into your hands, the thought of drinking it gone from your mind as you only focussed on your Captain. Your eyes remained on his and you smiled softly as you listened with keen interest before giving your input to the conversation with Law.Â
While other chatter sounded around you, the pair of you were unaware of the looks you were receiving. Penguin and Shachi were trying to hold back their smirks, Bepo and Ikkaku stared with dreamy expressions while the others looked at the scene before them completely baffled. All of them saw how obvious it was you and the Captain shared a deep connection and held even deeper feelings for each other. Why hadnât either of you noticed or tried to act on those feelings before? In the crewâs eyes the two of you were already a couple in all but name and acknowledgement from you and Law.Â
When you finally brought your lips to you mug your gaze broke reluctantly from Lawâs face and you caught sight of the time. As much as you could have easily spent the entire day talking to Law about anything and everything you knew your chores wouldnât do themselves. With a sigh you finished your drink and began to rise, gathering the cleared plates and bowls close to you to take them to the sink. As you leant forward to reach for something just out of your grasp, Jean Bart spoke up to ask Law a question, causing him to turn his head. Then the chatter stopped instantly and the dining hall froze in its entirety, everyone taking in the sight of Lawâs lips against yours.Â
You didnât even know how it happened, your mind couldnât register the odds of this kind of thing happening. One second you were reaching for a bowl, the next your Captainâs lips were against yours and you were unable to move and the look in Lawâs eyes told you everything; it was an accident and he seemed just as bewildered by the situation as you were. You couldnât hold back the heat bursting against your skin or silence the heavy hammering of your heart in your chest.Â
It felt like time had stopped when really the whole thing lasted a few seconds. You didnât even know how either of you managed to find the strength to disengage but you did it. While Law quickly made his way to the safety of his study, away from the prying eyes and excited whispers. You however werenât so privileged. You spent as long as possible standing at the sink, scrubbing the dishes for as long as you could, keeping your gaze on the water and not on the others of the crew you could feel were lingering in the room. When there was nothing else for you to clean you had no choice but to finally go to your assigned task for the day. Thankfully it was just you and Bepo doing the monthly stock check of the medical supplies which took most of the day and it was thankfully filled with silence due to complete concentration needing to be had.Â
However you knew Bepoâs lack of comment on the morningâs incident was too good to be true because when it came to delivering the updated stock numbers to Law, the damned bear was suddenly overcome with one of his stomachaches and needed to lie down immediately. You muttered curses over and over as you made your way to Lawâs office. Briskly you knocked on his door and entered when he called for you to enter. At first you thought you could pretend that what had happened never happened but when you walked in and met his gaze you faltered. You couldnât help but glance at his lips while tightly pressing your own into a tight line. Quickly you inwardly berated yourself for your juvenile reaction. With a sharp clearing of your throat you continued into his office. All you needed to do was give him the papers and leave, it was easy, youâd done it hundreds of times before.Â
âNo Bepo?â Law asked, trying to find something, anything to speak about to delay talking about the kiss.Â
âStomachache.â You explained, slipping the papers into his hand and then you paused. Normally you would stay and chat but if you did this time would he be thinking you were staying for something else? But if you left immediately then that would be out of character and would make him think something was wrong, that you didnât want to be around him anymore which couldnât be further from the truth. What if he wanted you to leave because of what happened? Your mind was spinning and you couldnât see an answer anywhere. Finally through your thoughts Lawâs voice saying your name made you focus. âYes?â You answered immediately.
âWas he okay?â Law asked, never forgetting his role as a Doctor even though he knew the bear would be more than okay. He highly suspected this was an instance that the navigator was lying, still he had to check.Â
âYou could offer to kiss him better.â Your joke came before your brain could stop you and you regretted it instantly, hands flying over your mouth as though you could force the words back. You always made jokes like this but given what had happened between you both this morning it just brought the memory and the feeling of his lips on yours flooding back. âSorry, Iâm sorry!â You rambled behind your hands.Â
You and Law stared at each other and finally he broke the silence and the tension by laughing, all but relieved that you were just as much as a mess as he was about it all. Seeing him laugh let you join in and it felt as though the weight on your shoulders and anxiety of that accidental kiss possibly ruining everything between you disappeared. It felt like how it normally did and you could breathe easier now. As the laughter eased away you caught your Captain staring at your lips just as you had his when you entered his office. âPermission to say as unexpected as it was, it was a nice kiss, Captain?â
âPermission granted.â Law smirked at you. âThough you must be easily pleased if that impressed you.â
âWow youâre so arrogant.â You rolled your eyes playfully. âI said it was nice, not that it blew my mind forever. I was just being kind.â
âNot arrogance if itâs fact.â Law replied smoothly as he rose from his seat to stand in front of you, his lips as close as possible without touching. âI can give you a real kiss now and âblow your mind foreverâ as you phrased it?â
âYouâre welcome to try, Captain.â You murmured, leaning your head back just a fraction and grinning in satisfaction to see him respond by leaning in again to maintain the infuriatingly close distance between you. There was a brief beat between you both before the space was closed and your lips met. You all but melted into Lawâs touch and he was right. Compared to this kiss right now, what youâd shared in the dining room that morning was nothing but a happy accident.
------------------------------------------------
TAG LIST (If I've missed anyone or if you want to be added just let me know) @3v37773, @tsaaps , @i-am-all-love-puns-and-lazy , @sanemisnonexistenteyebrow , @fiery-captain-spider-santa
#one piece#one piece imagines#one piece fic#one piece x you#one piece x reader#trafalgar law x reader#trafalgar law x you#one piece scenario#one piece fanfiction#trafalgar law#law x reader#law x you#law one piece#one piece law#trafalgar d water law#trafalgar one piece#trafalgar op
599 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi !! I love your writing! I think you've nailed the twst characters personalities really nicely <33
So if possible, I'd like to have some hcs Sebek, Ruggie, Jack, Jamil and Deuce would realize that they have a crush on the reader (in which the reader is basically their closest friend atp) and how'd they'd react to it. Would they be the type to shove it back down or get it over with? Something else entirely, maybe??
Hope this isn't too much. Thank you in advance! Take all the time you need!
hii first off thank you so much!! <3 and ofc ofc I LOVE pining (and friends to lovers?!)
pomefiore part
summary: how they would have a crush on you type of post: headcanons characters: deuce, jack, ruggie, jamil, sebek additional info: romantic, reader isn't specified to be yuu except in sebek's part because I found it funny, reader is gender neutral, deuce is a cutie patootie
đđđźđđ đđ©đđđ
oh, he is in utter turmoil about this
on one hand: he really, really likes you
you're such a wonderful person
the kind of partner he'd be proud to introduce to his mom
on the other hand...
he really, really doesn't want to mess this up
you already have such a great thing going on as friends!
if he ruined that, he would literally never forgive himself
and Ace would make fun of him for it until the very end of time itself
so, of course he just sits on these feelings. maybe if he focuses on something else, they'll go away?
spoiler alert: they do not
they definitely do not
if anything, trying to ignore them just makes it worse for him; suddenly he's becoming an entirely different person around you
it's like a switch is flipped the second you're in the room
he becomes clumsy, easily flustered, can barely string a sentence together
Ace gives him hell about it, of course
and when there's no hope of hiding it any longer, he just confesses
(not that it wasn't obvious already... but for his sake, you'll have to pretend like it's shocking news)
đđđđ€ đđšđ°đ„
he's actually... pretty upfront about it?
once he's got his feelings on the matter sorted, anyway
...which takes him a few weeks
when he first recognizes his crush on you, he pours himself into his training
not as a distraction, really; he just finds it easier to think when he's working out
he really does want to think this one through
much like Deuce, Jack understands that he'd put the friendship at risk if he were to confess
unlike Deuce, however, he's somewhat aware that ignoring and hiding is a coward's way out, and will only push you away
so, once he's very sure about his feelings, he confesses
it's not exactly like a confession, though
more of a... lecture?
just informs you that he's developed feelings, doesn't want them to affect the friendship, and leaves the decision up to you
won't freak if you don't reciprocate, but... he might be a little bummed out
okay... more than a little
đđźđ đ đąđ đđźđđđĄđą
first thought: he doesn't have time for this
Ruggie has a job, school, and a whole neighborhood to feed back home
now a partner? no, that's completely out of the question
besides, it's not like you'd ever reciprocate. who'd wanna spend every date eating dandelion salad?
no one, that's who
of course he doesn't bother asking, but he assumes that goes without saying
but he's busy enough to put those feelings on the back burner and deal with them some other day
...if only he wasn't so distracted by thoughts of you, that plan might have worked!
by his third slip-up, Leona's had enough and demands he's gotta sort out whatever's bothering him if he ever wants to show his face there again
(he might've been in a bad mood)
but, unfortunately, Ruggie knows he's right
it's better to be rejected now than to spend the rest of his school days mulling over it
so, he just spills the beans, as plain and simple as possible
tries to walk away as soon as he's done so he doesn't have to see the look on your face
you can imagine his surprise when you pull him back
đđđŠđąđ„ đđąđ©đđ«
actually has a pretty similar reaction to Ruggie
Jamil can't possibly fathom having a partner in a world where he doesn't even have his own freedom
in a sense, he just doesn't want to drag you into his life
in another, more important sense, he would be devastated if you rejected him
so he just... ignores it
of course, Jamil knows that pretending the feelings aren't there won't do much, but he doesn't really have a lot of options
he's not one to talk through his feelings, after all
not that anyone asks...
and his ability to interact with you as if nothing is different is astonishing
even if it feels like he's melting inside
though, you may catch him smiling more at you these days
he just can't help himself
when he's got his other stuff sorted, you'll be next on the agenda
đđđđđ€ đđąđ đŻđšđ„đ
you claim to have no magic, and yet you bewitch him into caring about you just as much as his liege?!
well... maybe not as much...
but close! very close!
even admitting that to himself feels like high treason
nonetheless, you have to be something very special to distract him from what he calls his "true purpose in life"
he sees you and feels... ill?
he's light-headed, he's dizzy, his stomach feels funny...
and he's been thinking about you more so than usual
yes, you're friends... he'll even admit he's grown quite fond of you in comparison to the other people you call "friends"
but this is... unusual
surely, you've placed some kind of curse on him!
Silver is the first to hear about it
poor boy is too tired to deal, and so he passes on the problem to Lilia
who just chuckles and makes a lot of odd references and metaphors that no one of this century would understand
no, Sebek has to come to the conclusion that he likes you all on his own
(like-likes you)
and after some pestering from Lilia, he admits that perhaps you and he could protect Malleus... together!
(he's going to have to work on the wording of that confession)
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#deuce spade x reader#jack howl x reader#ruggie bucchi x reader#jamil viper x reader#sebek zigvolt x reader#queued
734 notes
·
View notes
Text
there was a lot of mistakes made in the live action but the worst one without reservation was that the creators did not understand patriarchy and they did not understand women's liberation outside of an american context ( or any context if we're being honest )
it's easy to see on a surface level how that fucked up katara's whole character how she wasn't allowed to have her character defining moments how she wasn't allowed to be angry or even excited or impulsive but i think it doesn't really become clear how deeply wrong the show's conception of gender & patriarchy is (and the implications for the political landscape of the show) until you get into how they destroyed sokka's character too
sokka's whole Complex is born of patriarchy. i'm not trying to do men's rights advocacy here but in my experience when a people is under constant threat, constant assault, constant violence (much of which is gendered) and the traditional "protectors" or "providers" of that people are men, the masculine role becomes protecting women and children. i am not saying this is a good thing or a bad thing but it is true the narrative of violent resistance is overwhelmingly about men. to be a man in a time & place like this means fighting to protect your women, & to die for them is honorable. that is where sokka gets this idea that he has to be a warrior & he has to fight & if necessary die for katara & the rest of the tribe. it's about duty. everyone has a part to play, a role to fill
everyone including women! which is the other half of this. the duty of women is to keep up the home, to maintain a country worth fighting & dying for, to raise children so that the community can have a future. it becomes especially obvious in the context of the show when you see how the nwt lives & in specific how yue lives and dies.
many women participate in patriarchy. many colonized women participate in patriarchy. most of my family comes from or still lives in a country completely devastated by colonialism & its aftereffects & many women in my family believe wholeheartedly in the idea that everyone in the house has a role to play. it's not because these women are stupid or they hate themselves. but when you grow up believing that men & women are fundamentally different, and seeing that women are in specific danger because of their gender, it actually makes a lot of sense to expect the men in your family to protect you, and to raise your sons that way.
in practice that means that men aren't really expected to do anything around the house, especially when there's no actual danger. my aunt literally 2 days ago told me this lol like she doesn't make her sons do anything bc she wants to let their lives be easy before they have to go out into the world & take care of their wives & children.
what does women's liberation look like when an entire community is under threat? colonized women have been dealing with this question as long as colonialism has existed. the writers of this show don't even pretend to understand the question, much less to formulate a thoughtful response to it. they just say oh, well, katara, yue, & suki are all the exact same type of liberated girlboss for whom patriarchy is no significant obstacle.
which brings us back to sokka lol. sokka, at the beginning of the show, has completely subscribed to patriarchy, has integrated it into his sense of self. he has a lot of flaws, but he also has a lot of really good traits. his bravery, sense of honor, loyalty, work ethic, selflessness, all of this came from him striving to be a good man. he would die to protect katara, because she's his sister. he also has her wash his socks & mend his clothes, because she's his sister. even after he meets suki, humbles himself, & expands his view of the role a woman can play, he doesn't completely disengage from patriarchy. at the end of the day he believes in his soul that a good man's duty is to fight & if necessary die for his people, & that's exactly his plan. this is a very real psychic burden. pre-aang, it's also largely fictional & completely ridiculous. we're SUPPOSED to think it's ridiculous. he's spending his time training babies & working on his little watchtower. the swt hasn't been attacked since their mother was killed because it has been completely stripped of all value or danger it once held for the fire nation, & everybody knows this. there is very little "men's work" left, aside from hunting & fishing, which is so damaging to sokka's self image he resorts to toddler bootcamp to feel useful. the contradiction here is comical. it's also completely devastating. that's supposed to be the fucking POINTTTT like colonialism & patriarchy convinces this young boy he needs to be a soldier & die for his family. & you know what he does? He acts like a young boy about it. they didn't just leave this unexplored in the remake they completely changed the circumstances to 1. make sokka incompetent for some reason 2. make his "preparations" seem less ridiculous. Which ruins the whole character. Possibly the whole show.
all this makes the writing of katara & the other women infinitely more offensive to me. katara is a good character because she believes in revolution. she wants to liberate her people from imperialism, & she wants to liberate women from colonial gendered violence, traditional patriarchy in her own culture, & the complicated ways those things interact. it is LITERALLY the first thing you're supposed to learn about her. she's the PERFECT vehicle to address the question of women's liberation under colonialism. one of the things i was most looking forward to seeing in this show was how labor is distributed in a place where almost everything that needs to get done is "women's work" & how it affects katara & sokka's day to day relationship when their lives weren't at risk constantly. what actually are her responsibilities every day, & how do they compare to sokka's? how does her grandmother enforce these traditions with katara & sokka, & how is that informed by her own experiences in the nwt? what does patriarchy look like in a tribe made up of mostly women & children? it's so important to who katara is & what she believes! but why bother exploring any of that when u could instead make her a shein model who has nothing in common with the source material except her hairstyle lol.
yue is actually even worse to me bc yue is supposed to be sokka's counterpart. she's supposed to show you how destructive it is for women specifically to internalize this gendered duty so completely. it sucks for sokka, but he is a man & thus his prescribed role gives him some agency. yue's role affords her no agency whatsoever, & this is the POINT. to make her someone who's allowed to break things off with her fiance if she likes, who sneaks off to do what she wants when she's feeling stressed, whose will is respected as a monarch, like what is even the point of yue anymore? in the original the whole reason she was even allowed to spend time with sokka was because her father knew she was with a trustworthy boy. her story completely loses all significance when the dimension of patriarchy is removed from it. the crux of her whole story is that she is not just a princess but the literal & spiritual representation of the motherland. that's what women are supposed to represent during wartime, at the cost of their own sense of self. in order to fulfill her duty to her people she gives her life to them in every single way that matters.
it's just so unbelievably frustrating (and WRONG) that the only types of characters for these writers are "soulless misogynistic fuck" and "liberated american-style feminist." there's no nuance at all! they don't bother exploring how real love manifests in patriarchal communities, & how patriarchy defines the limits of that love. or how for so many of these people their idea of goodness, morality, & honor is gendered. or how imperialism affects not just individuals but entire cultures & their conceptions of gender. but why do any actual work when you could completely change sokka & katara's general demeanors, their entire personalities, & their roles in the tribe so you can dodge any & all nuance
Anyways. in conclusion. it was bad
561 notes
·
View notes
Text
One thing I wish I'd see more of among Ratio fans is some thought about how he views himself as a teacher.
Like yes, of course he refuses to compromise on the quality and rigor of the education he imparts, and he would find it unforgivably unethical to lower his standards in order to pass more students who had not genuinely learned the material. This is core to his character.
However, as someone who is a teacher IRL, I know the absolutely miserable feeling setting that kind of standard can cause. There's the obvious disheartening sense of disappointment ("Are students these days really not capable of doing the work correctly? Is our future in danger, if this is the highest level of understanding our current generation of students can achieve?"), but even worse than that is the self-doubt.
"Is this somehow my fault? Am I not teaching this material in the right ways for the students to learn? Is there something I could have done differently to get through to these students? Would a better teacher have a higher passing rate?"
We know that Ratio does (or at least did) struggle with feeling inferior to the Genius Society, so I think it is also likely, as much as he absolutely will not budge on his academic standards, that he has doubts about his teaching ability as well.
This is the man who wants to educate the entire world to cure the disease of ignorance, and yet only 3% of his actual students are able to get there. How can someone who gets so few of his direct students to a state of enlightenment hope to enlighten the whole universe? If so few students are successfully learning the material of a given class, doesn't that mean the teacher is doing something wrong?Would a better teacher--would a genius, maybe--not be able to impart their knowledge more efficiently and educate even the most challenging of students?
As someone constantly struggling with that balance between keeping academic standards high while also meeting the needs of today's students, I think the passing rates of his courses must affect Dr. Ratio much more deeply than I've seen fans discuss. I think he would question himself harshly over his class success rates, and I think he must be constantly trying to push himself to become the best teacher he possibly can be.
tl;dr: I hope one day the HSR fandom will stop sleeping on the fact that Ratio is an actual practicing professor who probably has astronomical levels of teacher angst. đ
#honkai star rail#dr. ratio#not to be#ratiorine#in everything I post but#secretly this is just an excuse to imagine Aventurine throwing Ratio a sympathy party#a âLet's eat our feelings" party because the doctor just got his course evals back#and there are some insults on there that would make his ancestors cry#I can just imagine Aventurine reading out the really obnoxious Rate My Professor reviews#in whiny entitled voices#just to squeak a smile out of a gloomy Ratio#but I also really like the idea of Aventurine helping Ratio become a better teacher!!#because he's sharp and a fast learner#but he doesn't have a background in formal/public education#he's not set in the system's ways#he could suggest some really out-of-the-box ideas to help Ratio get through to more students#and be a great sounding board for Ratio's lesson material#brutally honest feedback lol#âRatio I am in love with you but I still can't listen to you talk about gravitational time dilation for one minute moreâ#âYou're going to HAVE to make this lecture less dry than my martini.â#look let me just enjoy this teacher fantasy for a sec#lol
401 notes
·
View notes
Text
Matching - Portgas D. Ace
Find more of my work here: Tumblr MasterList
This is a little idea I had for a larger Ace fanfic I'm working on. I might revise this! Please let me know if he's in character or not...I'm starting to have my doubts.
It had been the better part of a week. No, maybe a whole week at this point. While before youâd spend most of your free time around him, now you were constantly âbusy.â Heck sometimes he even finds it difficult to find you on the Moby Dick! Was this the end of the honeymoon phase everyone warned him about?
Were you starting to get tired of him?
You kept sneaking around...without him! Before you used to sneak around together! Worse still isâŠevery time he pops up to see you, you always seem like you're hiding something. It's like quickly stashed papers, and tightly clenched fists. Itâs the way you spin on your heel, and tense up, when you used to not do that at all.
What was maddening was how when the evenings would hit, or even at random parts of the day, youâd run and crash into him with a huge hug. Youâd beam at him bright and genuine just upon seeing him, heck youâd be practically vibrating with joy as youâd squeeze the life out of him. Heâd almost turned to fire once.
Maybe you werenât tired of him?
When you did cuddle with him, your eyes seemed to linger on the tattoo on his arm. Heâd even woken up to you tracing it with your finger once before. Youâd looked sheepish that heâd caught you admiring itâŠactually you looked a littleâŠpanicked tooâŠ
Youâd squirmed in his grasp when he asked you about it. Saying things like how itâs pretty, and how itâs a tattoo unique to him, so you were admiring it. You're pretty good at dodging his line of questioning whenever he voices his suspicions about your behavior. You were also incredibly sneaky about distracting him with your affections, and by the time heâs regained his original line of thought, youâd already be gone.Â
There's something fishy in the air and it's not the sea king he caught the other day.
He only finds out what it is you'd been scheming behind his back when he gets back from a mission. He was so distracted for most of it. He couldnât figure out why you were so clearly avoiding him sometimesâŠwere you having second thoughts? What was going on? Was this an elaborate prank?
He was still in a daze as he made his way back to the Moby Dick. You used to bring peace, yet right now youâd thrown him into turmoil. He hated the way he was doubting you. He hated not knowing what was wrong.
âHey look Aceâs back!â
âHowâd it go champ?â
âAaaaaaacee!â It was your voice that pulled him back completely.
Heâd barely had a moment to look up than youâd thrown yourself on him with a hug. The force of it all almost send him toppling backwards. His hat had been knocked off his head, and he could feel the press of its medallion on his throat. He's relieved at how genuinely happy you are to see him, yet still an unease twists up his stomach in knots.
You pull away much too quickly, pulling his arms and rotating them, checking for any damage. The way you're checking up on him to make sure he's not hurt and that he's okay floods his entire system with warmth. Yet he can't help the constriction in his chest and the nagging as to what it was that had you sneaking around before he left if you missed him this badly?
He can hear the crew laughing at the obvious display of affection.
âBeing bold there little missy,â they taunt you.
You shrink in on yourself a bit, embarrassment catching up to you. However when you take his hand in yours, and whistles and cheers break out, âI was doing it for Ace,â the timidity in the lines of your shoulders and face brings the heat to his own face, âI thought he might like it.â
He squeezes your hand in his. Yet his brain screams at him, then what was all that sneaking around about?
Unsure how to deal with things, he just studies you closely as you ask him about how things went and how the mission was. You're not up to anything really, or at least it doesn't seem like it. You're as attentive and engaged as ever, things are just as they used to be before.
You drag him to the kitchen, knowing he must be hungry as he usually is after a mission. You even sit with him in your little corner of the mess hall while he eats, something you hadnât done much prior to his departure. He's talking to you about the guy with the interesting abilities that he'd fought with his mouth full, and you're indulging him.
Yet even as he tries to fall into your old pattern, the confusion only festers further. What had been going on with you?
He feels absolutely awful, doubting you with the way youâre listening to him like he's the most interesting guy in the world. To be fair, to you, he really is. He keeps talking and chewing and answering your questions, yet the thing he really wants to talk about is bubbling just below the surface. Somehow all the tension and excitement peaks and he goes head first into his plate of food.
When he finally comes back to, thereâs no food on his face, and heâs resting on his arms on the dinner table, his plate off to his side. Youâre still next to him, gently brushing your fingers through his hair, patiently de-tangling any clumps you come across. He groans while sitting up and blinking the sleep away.
âYouâre up,â you observe aloud, âhere let me clear these out of the way for you.â
You get up from beside him, unthinkingly pulling your sleeves up your forearms, and reach for the plates around him. He notices something odd about one of your hands as you walk away with the stack of plates in your hands, but before he can say much you're already on your way to the kitchen counter. He watches you, lethargically shoving food in his mouth as you hand the dishes over to Thatch, who looks at your hands, then looks his way for a moment with an amused grin.
He could actually hear the next thing as the cook raised his voice, ânah leave those dishes to me, go hang out with your loverboy.â
Had the pirate not shoved you away with a plate of food in hand, Ace got the feeling you would have pointedly ignored Thatchâs teasing to do the dishes. You walked back, your brow and lips pursed in a kind of indignation. He couldnât help the little huff of amusement. Youâd gotten much better at handling their teasing over time, but he wouldnât deny it was cute how it would get to you sometimes.
You took a seat beside him again, sliding the plate the cook had given you towards him. YourâŠwell he could only hope he was still really your beloved, just stared at you in silence as he chewed. For some reason it made you squirm.
Thatâs it. Heâd had enough. He has to figure this out. Youâd said it yourself, itâs really important to communicate things! Thatâs how relationships last!
âYouâve been real weird lately,â was what came out as he grabbed the new plate of food, âyou been avoiding me?â
His brow furrowed at the way your gaze immediately fell, taking your expression with it, and how you began to fidget with your fingers - a nervous - wait. Aceâs hand extended to grab your left one, bringing it up to his face.
There on your left wrist, right where your pulse sat, in black ink sat the letters ASCE, arranged horizontally and smaller, but a perfect replica of his own otherwise. Instinctively he rubbed his thumb across it, almost as though he was checking to make sure this wasnât an illusion and that wasnât just normal ink from a pen.
You were looking back at him, he could see it in the way your shoulders bunched near your ears, and the wobble of your lips, and how you couldnât keep eye contact for too long, but kept glancing back at himâŠyou were nervous. He absentmindedly began drawing circles on your wrist, just staring at you.
âI was avoiding you, I guess,â you admitted, âI was hoping to surprise you with that,â your free hand moved to play with the hem of your shirt, as you shrunk even more, âwas it presumptuous of me? Should I have asked first?â
âFor a second I thought Iâd managed to chase you away,â he admitted quietly, looking back down at the mark of permanence youâd etched into your skin, âthat youâd gotten sick of me.â
You snatched your hand away before he could think, moving in to embrace him, âget sick, of you? Then Iâd be a tasteless heathen orâŠwhatever, unworthy of you- totally - completely - absolutely unworthy of you!â
Your arms tighten around him, âIâm so sorry I put you through that love.â
âAll that sneaking around was for this tattoo?â He couldnât help the involuntary little crack in his voice. âYou really did surprise me darlinâ.â
He pulls away from you first and his hands find your wrists, and his eyes again fall onto the symbol, the symbol of him, lovingly tattooed into your skin. A mark to let people know just who put the ring on your finger.Â
He didnât look up from it, even when you spoke up again, âAce,â he just traced circles over the mark that sat proudly in bold black letters, âIâm really sorry that I made you feel that way - wait does that sound? Itâs not-no wait. Itâs my fault!â He glanced up at you for a moment as you struggled to put what you wanted to say into words, working strenuously to apologize sincerely.
His lips wobbled upwards.
He couldnât help it.
Youâd gone out of your way, to tattoo his mark onto your body. He couldnât help but stare at it as he continued to rub circles with his thumb. Not only that, you were straining yourself so much all because he voiced that damned insecurity of his.
âI didnât mean to put you through that?â You tried again. âI wanted it to be a surprise, but I didnât want to hurt you.â You paused, and he felt you move closer. âIâm sorry if what I did hurt you-no-Iâm sorry that I did hurt you.â
There was a pricking at the corners of eyes, as he finally took his eyes off your little gift to him to look at you. There was a kind of relief, or maybe it was appreciation? Maybe even a tinge of surprise? He was touched, that was one thing he knew for sure-if the fire that burned in his chest was any indication. He was a sick bastard for appreciating this, wasnât he? Seeing you so genuinely apologetic - it was alarming really, did he really deserve this apology when he was doubting you? How could he ever hope to compete with this?
âYouâve got nothing to apologize for, doll,â his voice was uncharacteristically quiet as he continued to rub circles into your wrists.
âNo I do,â you insisted, âAce, Iâm happy youâre communicating how you felt to me,â you responded quietly, but firmly, âso donât downplay how it felt when I was the one being sneaky.â
âYou didnât mean any harm though,â his lips pull into a gentle smile as he slowly brings your tattooed pulse up to brush his lips against it before flicking his gaze to meet yours, âyou were here prepping this lovely gift for me and I was only thinking of myself.â
A smirk tugs at his lips at the way you have to shake yourself out of whatever spell heâd placed you under, âjust because I didnât mean any harm, doesnât mean I didnât do any harm,â you press on, shuddering a bit when he brushes another kiss to your pulse, âif you did the same, Iâd probably have felt the same way too, you have nothing to feel bad about.â
âForgive me for doubting you, cariña?â
He almost laughs at the affronted look you give him, firing back a, âforgive me for hurting you, love?â
âNothing to forgive,â heâs smiling more now, âIâm glad you were being so sneaky, made this surprise all the better.â
âDonât downplay your feelings Portgas D. Ace,â he could hear your frown, âyour feelings are important to me, youâre important to me.â
âMy full name cariña?â He couldnât help but tease.
âYes,â you answered immediately and he looked up to see how upset you looked - it was almost annoying - heâd rather not dwell, âI want you to get just how upset you were off your chest.â
That got a chuckle out of him, despite the irritation that was rising.
âI donât want to think about it too much,â his smile fell for a moment, âI donât want to ruin this happy moment with stupid emotions in the past.â
âBut I donât want them to fester-âÂ
âMi amor,â he looked at you, almost pleading, âitâs true I felt like you were ignoring me, but seeing your little surprise makes me the happiest man on the five seas.â
Seems that was enough to quiet you. Though⊠âsix, if you include the All Blue.â
When you chuckled at him, he felt his smile returning. He honestly couldnât care less about the past. Heâd said his piece, youâd talked it out, he didnât care anymore.
âSo, you know I love you right?â The timid way in which you asked was enough to knock the wind out of him.
Yet, he grinned, and brought your marked pulse up to lips again, âI love you too.â
âOi get a room!â The two of you startled at the sudden shout coming from the other end of the mess hall. âSure we can barely see you in your little corner, but the lovey-dovey energy in here is off the charts!â Â
âShut up Thatch!â Ace fired back. âYouâre just mad you canât gossip to Marco about it!â
âYouâre the one blocking the show!â
âGood!â
âItâs real funny though,â there was a pause, âwhoâd have thought the wild Fire Fist was actually a huge pile of mush!â
With the newfound yelling, people started to file into the mess hall. Which was when he noticed it was mostly empty prior to that. Of course among the people who filed in was the aforementioned first division commander.
âYou like your little surprise Ace?â He asked the younger man.
âWait you knew?â
âWho else would she ask yoi?â The medic gave him a lazy grin before turning to you. âSo, did you get to say what you wanted to say yoi?â
Ace studied you as you shook your head looking both disappointed and sheepish.
âWhat did you want to say?â He couldnât help but ask.
You huffed, a sheepish smile wobbling your lips, as you moved to his left side, your right hand pushing his upper arm to show more of his tattoo.
"See,â you held up your own tattooed wrist next to his arm, ânow we match."
Extra:
Ace later: âIâm gonna marry her.â
Marco (who is next to him): âarenât you already married?â
#portgas d ace x reader#portgas ace x reader#portgas ace x you#one piece x reader#one piece x you#portgas d ace x you#portgas d ace fluff#portgas d ace#portgas d ace fanfic#one piece fanfiction#one piece#ace one piece
561 notes
·
View notes
Text
Iâve watched the entire series again today in a hungover state and I CANâT DEAL with all the parallels.
I mean, when Lucy finds out about her Dadâs true actions and origins - her whole world falls apart. She saw the vaults as safety - she looked up to her Dad more than anyone else in the world. She learns that heâs lied about who he is as a man and as her father, but also she must realise that the vaultâs are hiding their own dirty secrets (especially after her experience at vault 4) and that her Dad is a part of that too. She even says to Max, after leaving vault 4, that if she destroyed a whole community to save him, he would be heartbroken: when thatâs exactly what he did on an even grander and more terrible scale. Lucyâs life wasnât even in direct danger to warrant that reaction - heâs just an insecure selfish arsehole.
At the very same time we see the flashback scene of Coop hearing Barb suggest that they drop the bombs on America. This woman that he loves and trusts and has made a family with - who he said he fell in love with because she always tries to do the right thing. Their reactions at the point of realisation - shock, inability to speak, almost dissociation - are both extremely similar. Him having gone through that betrayal before (and likely plenty of times since) is EXACTLY why he talks to Lucy how he does. Heâs preparing her for the eventual heartbreak - because he has experience which states that nothing could ever be as perfect as she claims her life is. When heâs making ass jerky from Roger, he even tells her: thereâs what people say they do and then thereâs what they really do.
When you look at all of that, really, in the scheme of things, Coop - the man that sheâs seen as this inhuman, cruel, murderous monster - heâs the good guy. He too thought his wifeâs business with vault tec was abhorrent. Yes, heâs been warped and twisted by the wasteland and by his own trauma - but he does see this brightness in Lucy. He thought she was just naive and full of bullshit (especially being a vault dweller. Something which Iâm sure triggered him considering his past with vault tec and the links to his wife) but when she proved herself by giving him the vials instead of letting him die, heâs probably amazed that thereâs someone left in the world who isnât just a liar and a terrible person. Heâs so used to betrayal and violence by this point. Sheâs a good person - a trait that he literally said he was in love with his wife because of. She softens him.
But she also proves herself in another way - by shooting her feralled mother - showing that sheâs also grown and learnt that not everything is black and white. Itâs not just âgood and badâ in this world. And although Coop has questionable morals, heâs honest, like her. He tells it how it is. Plus, after her Dadâs huge life changing betrayal and her time in the wasteland, she understands a little more why Coop has done all the things that sheâs seen him do - I mean he did meet her pretty much day one out of the vault initially - hence why she goes with him. He has hardened her up to protect her in the wasteland.
Wilzig even says âwill you still want the same things when youâre a different animal altogether.â
My god. Itâs just genius. Absolutely genius.
âYou cominâ?â
Edit: Can we also talk about how Coop is basically the inspiration for the vault boy - who Lucy basically looks to (physically a few times throughout the series) for inspiration to do the right thing. AND the fact that her Dad was obviously a bit obsessed with Coop and probably still was when Lucy was born, seeing as heâd been in a pod and had only just woken up, retaining recent memories. So Lucy likely watched all of his films and her Dad maybe even saw him as a bit of a role model (or at least his in-film characters). AND the obvious exchange of index fingers. Yup. Honestly if this relationship doesnât become cannon, I will start dropping bombs too.
ANOTHER EDIT: Sorry one last thing but, I just want to add: nothing that post-war Coop does is personal. Itâs either: to get a job done, survival, because heâs been triggered by something (understandable after whatâs he been through) or, in Lucyâs case, to teach a (admittedly often harsh) lesson. He doesnât just mindlessly kill - or particularly enjoy killing - he just has no issue with it, itâs all just means to an end. He even still remembers to pay for his tomatoes in Filly ffs haha⊠I imagine heâs extremely numb and devoid of all feeling - except for when it comes to his wife and little girl. Thatâs the only time we see more visceral reactions in either actions or dialogue from him. Heâs such an intricate character and Walton did an amazing job of portraying him.
#fallout#post apocalyptic#cooper howard#ghoul#bethesda#ghoul fucker#ghouls#Lucy Maclean#Hank Maclean#subtext#series#writing#ghoulcy#the ghoul#walton goggins#ella purnell#jonathan nolan#fallout amazon#tv adaptation#vaultghoul#spoilers#parallels
230 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm having a lot of thoughts and feelings about Lucanis's quest line. This all started when I was talking myself through what I consider critiques of the game - things I didn't like (which is a whole other post tbd). And I sort of stumbled into how I felt in the initial moment when I realized Illario really had betrayed Lucanis.
My immediate reaction was... Disappointment. And I thought I was disappointed because it felt too easy and out of character, but as I talked myself through it (verbal processing ftw) I think I stumbled onto the truth of the matter. Or at least, it feels true to me.
I read The Wigmaker Job and The Wake multiple times before VG released. Lucanis was my #1 hope for a companion before they were announced. I know and love these idiot Dellamortes.
So when the game took every opportunity to tell me Illario betrayed Lucanis, I didn't believe it. It was TOO obvious, too heavy-handed. And Illario loves his cousin, so surely there must be a twist.
I kept waiting, kept denying, until Bloodbath when it became pretty fucking clear that Illario was, if not directly responsible, definitely involved in Lucanis's imprisonment in the Ossuary. The betrayal was real. And I screamed at my TV and threw a pillow and had to take a break.
Now, here's why I think this is actually an example of brilliant writing:
The game told me over and over and over again that Illario betrayed Lucanis. And, because I did my homework and read the tie-in media, I liked Illario too much to believe it was him. Because I am trained by a lifetime of consuming narratives to believe that the obvious culprit is NEVER the actual culprit, I denied the reality the game kept presenting.
I said, "nope. No way. Not Illario."
Just.
Like.
Lucanis.
The game manipulated me into a similar (if not identical) viewpoint as Lucanis, until we were both forced to accept and face the truth. The terrible thing is not only possible, it's true. It happened. And no amount of lying to yourself will change that.
Which is also the entire theme about Spite. About acknowledging the trauma you've experienced and then finding a way to live with and through it. You can't keep hiding from it. It won't go away.
Lucanis's whole story is: the terrible thing happened. You can't undo it, can't unsee it. If you do nothing, then you will never be free of it. So, what do you do now?
And that's what Illario's betrayal is - an external version of the inner struggle Lucanis is battling.
Basically, once I realized how beautifully the writing maneuvered me through this narrative, I stopped thinking about any potential "bad" writing. This game is brilliant and I will not be taking questions at this time.
#datv spoilers#dav spoilers#da4 spoilers#dragon age spoilers#veilguard spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#illario dellamorte#himluv rambles about pixels again
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay. While we're talking about EarthSpark S1 problems that have been made worse by S2. Why is Megatron special?
One of the weakest parts of EarthSpark for me has always been the fact that Megatron is the only Decepticon known to have defected. Later on, Cons like Breakdown, Tarantulas, and even Starscream added some nuance by showing them willing to risk themselves for non-Decepticons, though understandably, none of them were willing to defect at that point. But even though such Cons clearly existed, none of them defected along with Megatron, or at any other point during the war.
And Megatron's own defection was just... It's painfully obvious that he was developed to be a Good Guy and didn't have a lot of thought put into what he was like as a Decepticon. By his own admission and Starscream's assessment, he was a violent leader who ruled with fear, but all it took to make him change sides was... Seeing a human care more about his side than he did? That's it? And if that is why he changed sides, he clearly took the wrong lesson away from that, because he still doesn't care about what used to be his side. Instead of trying to do better by them, he abandons them. And then all he has to do to make Optimus trust him is... Scan an Earth altmode. Really.
It all feels very weak to me, and doesn't adequately explain anything. Did Megatron make any attempt to be a kinder leader, or did he just defect immediately after seeing the Error Of His Ways? How did we get from "damn, I don't care about my guys enough" to "my whole cause is corrupt, I'mma go now"? Did he ever try to use his position as leader of the freaking Decepticons to end the war peacefully or steer them onto a better path, or did he just wash his hands of them the moment he considered himself morally superior to them? If he did try to use his influence before bailing, how did he change so much so fast that none of his officers wanted to follow him anymore? Why did he give up on his entire faction and not bring any of the more open-minded Decepticons with him?
There are so many questions that either aren't answered or only get vague suggestions of what might have happened, and the answers we do get aren't enough for me to buy Megatron's redemption. It all feels too fast and too easy, and I do not understand why he could defect from the faction he led but less committed Decepticons just didn't.
And now all of these issues are worse than ever, because all the nuance the other Decepticons had is gone. Now it's just "Y'know, Decepticons. They're evil." Apparently not all of them, because Megatron is still hanging out with the Autobots, Con insignia and all! I ask again, why is Megatron special? Why does he get to change but all the others have to be flat and evil?
The real-world answer, of course, is that he never changed. He was conceived as a good person and ally to the Autobots, and that's how he's going to stay. But you cannot have a "Cons are just evil" story while the ex-leader of the Cons is walking freely in the Autobot base. Megatron's entire character is only possible with the assumption that Decepticons are capable of changing, and trying to revert to Cons Evil makes his redemption weaker than ever. Because it's so painfully obvious that he was written to be a good person and his dark history doesn't actually matter.
#transformers#Transformers EarthSpark#EarthSpark spoilers#Barely spoilers since this is mostly about S1 but eh#Unpopular Opinions#Megatron#I haven't seen anyone talking about how S2 reflects on Megatron#Outside of commenting on the fact that Starscream is once again made worse than his abuser#And to be fair I'm probably one of the only people who has a problem with Megatron's redemption in the first place#But it was always a weak spot in the show and has gotten weaker
182 notes
·
View notes
Note
iâm curious, how would PTM be if you had chosen to write it as Floyd/Reader instead of Jade/Reader?
i know the basic premise would have stayed the same. the backbone of telepathy drives the plot. however, the allure of the early chapters is that jade acts so differently from how he thinks (and thatâs very endearing and humorous).
if you had chosen floyd, would you have done his thoughts much more sweeter than raunchy? or would it had been kept the same formula of lovey-dovey thoughts versus friendly actions?
xoxo mochi
xoxo re-l! it's nice to see you in my inbox! ^^ I like getting questions like these on my fics too I'm such a yapper when I have the time tehehe
So when choosing who to make the love interest for PTM, I was basing it a bit off of the characters from Mousou Telepathy since that was the inspiration. I didn't want it to be an exact retelling with new characters, which is why you can see the beginning is borrowing a lot from the manga while the rest starts taking it's own form. But to make it easier on myself in the beginning, I wanted to pick a character that would be shocking to hear raunchy thoughts from or at the very least funny.
My original list for the "shocking" characters were: Silver, Trey, Azul, Jamil, Vil and Sebek; this was narrowed down to Silver and Azul eventually. The original list for "funny" characters for PTM were: Jade, Floyd, Ace, Rook, and Leona. That got narrowed down to Jade and Leona, actually. Eventually I was stuck between Jade and Silver and I decided to go with Jade because I like my silly eel boy~
I think this worked out for the best, Jade I find is easy to write most of the time and he's a very fun character overall! He's not necessarily super cool or nonchalant like the love interest from the original manga, but he fits the premise beautifully in his own Jade way!
One of the reasons I didn't go with Floyd for PTM was because of the raunchy thoughts. I wanted whoever I set as love interest to be a bit shocking when it came to the dirty thoughts, and I feel that the fandom expects Floyd to be a bit raunchy and blunt. Pair that with the fact that Floyd doesn't really hide his thoughts from others (more so that I think they get misinterpreted at times), I didn't think the story would be as enjoyable with the same premise, and the shockingly erotic thoughts are part of what makes the story so funny!
If I had decided to do Floyd, I would have definitely made his thoughts much softer, more domestic. But from my understanding of Floyd as a character, I think he probably either would've confessed right away (so it would've been more of a oneshot) or the entire story would've been in Floyd's POV wondering why his mate that he totally made obvious that he's in love with and courting (which he hasn't) is being so weird around him and blushing all the time.
I'm quite happy with Jade being the love interest for PTM, it's turned out pretty good and a lot of people really seem to like it! The next chapter probably won't come out for a while since I'm busy with school and smaller stories are a lot easier to finish quick, but I'll try my best!
#mochi asks#rel124c41#ptm#twisted wonderland#twst#people pls ask more questions about ptm and stuff like this all around i lvoe yapping#which reminds me i have other asks i need to go yap about now expect a few more posts from me hehe#also imagine silver in ptm instead :O the silliness that could occur...
88 notes
·
View notes
Text
How Corrupt Is Hero Society?. Part 2
Nomu and Endeavor, a cause for concern
To add to the today's chatter about Endeavor and his excessive force and how that applies to the rest of MHA's "heroics". I'd like to point something out
It has always been this way
Excessive violence against Nomu isn't anything new, ever since Hori downgraded them into punching bags so the audience wouldnt question the morality of it all.
It does, however bring into light just how desensitized Hero Society is, how they view villains and may display some quirk-ism. Allow me to elaborate.
To the publics knowledge this is a PERSON.
The general public, hell most heroes. Had no fucking clue what a Nomu was. To their knowledge this was just someone with a heavy mutation quirk.
And they just, carry on.
Endeavor's gut instinct here was to burn his head off to stop him from regenerating and no one bats an eye.
But don't worry it gets worse.
Gran Torino is someone the community has dug into countless times for his attitudes towards Shigaraki and belief that "killing is another way to save"
So when Torino does this:
it doesn't really help his case, especially when Endeavor tried to kill that Nomu prior to this by incinerating him alive (almost killing 2 civilians. But I'll get to that)
Such a move would at the very least, sever someone's spine rendering them paralyzed for life. While I can see what Torino was trying to do, the ends do not justify the means here.
I'm not saying the Nomu are innocent, but it's blatantly obvious that they should be aiming to detain them rather than resorting to lethal force right away.
The worst part is the public has no reaction to this. No one asks anything and the authorities sure as hell aren't telling them squat.
We see it again during the Hood Fight and what's worse is that Hood can talk, bringing into question of how sapient is Hood.
Again Endeavor incinerates the Villain and no questions are asked.
Alright remember what I said about the two civilians?. well it gets worse, Firstly, they didn't even know if they were alright until near the end of the Hosu Incident, just letting them run off.
After Endeavor recklessly unleashes a wall of flame, the Nomu absorbs it and processed to reflect the same attack.
(on a second note: Torino and Enji even refer to the Nomu as if they were fighting a Human!?)
What does this mean?. Well that Enji ran into that fight without thinking!.
He didn't even so much as think up a strategy (just like a certain blonde we all know and despise) for what would happen if the opponent just, didn't die.
In Vigilantes he opts to bathe an entire city block in fire because he can't find the Villain (6)
He creates a fucking fire tornado with no thought for collateral damage
(The reactions of his sidekicks concern me, though knowing how Burnin' reacted to Dabi's exposé I'm not suprised.)
Given that he's this destructive and openly antagonistic in public, I don't even want to imagine the state Rei was in after every "training session" spent protecting Shoto.
This is why looking back, I can't say I'm suprised how some of the civilians dove back into worshipping heroes, even after Hawks killed a man and Heroes left them to fend for themselves.
Because as the saying goes
A bird stuck in a cage believes flying to be an illness
_______________________________________
Additional Info:
As pointed out by @gecmi09 (thank you for bringing that up), Endeavor did indeed refer to Crawler and Popstep as villains, as seen here:
I'd like to draw attention to the fact that he is drawn in a similar manner to Number Six, who is also often drawn in a silhouetted fashion, especially when his true colors are exposed.
The two characters are ironically very similar. Both are willing to resort to destructive means if it means achieving their goals.
Both willingly hurt those around/close them and use flawed logic in an attempt to justify their actions.
Both pretend to be something/someone they're not
Both of them brought about their own demise through one of their victims (Dabi and Knuckleduster [who took in Koichi] respectively. Though Six's was more indirect.)
Even though Vigilantes is loosely attached to MHA, I find it interesting that these two characters are so similar. Really makes you think.
#mha critical#anti endeavor#anti enji todoroki#anti gran torino#the nomu deserved better#at least potential wise#to throw it out there#justice for rei himura#bnha critical#anti bakugo katsuki#if you squint
105 notes
·
View notes
Note
I donât know if you already wrote about this so forgive me if this is a repeat question but, what do you think about Leonaâs depression? I feel itâs pretty obvious in game and yet itâs always glossed over as him being âlazyâ idk but I donât find many talking about his really shitty mental health with any seriousness.
Surprisingly I haven't addressed this (at least not in detail)! So thank you for bringing this to my attention; I definitely feel like I've heard people (especially Leona fans) discuss this quite frequently. If you look in the right places, youâre sure to find insightful commentary on the subject! I know I certainly have, but I've yet to say my own piece on it yet.
Now, before I actually get to actually rambling, I want to preface this post with a few points so we can walk in knowing the perspective I'm coming from. Analysis isn't a "one size fits all"! My experiences and background will color the lenses through which I view Leonaâs mental health.
First and foremost, I usually don't go out of my way to claim, "this character has X condition" beyond what is outright stated or implied in canon. That does NOT mean that I disapprove of fans who may have their headcanons that say otherwise or project onto or relate to characters' mental health. You can consume the media you like however you want! I am just saying that I don't have this preference so I feel somewhat uncomfortable speaking on this matter.
Secondly, I am trying to approach this situation from a very clinical viewpoint (as I do have knowledge in this area). This means that when I look for âimplicationsâ or read between the lines, I am doing so as objectively as I can. Itâs how I choose to process and understand characters from a health angle. This does not mean that my opinion is certain; you could very well find someone else in this area that gives you the opposite opinion. As always, I warn you that my response is for fun, it is NOT meant to be taken as medical advice.
Lastly, PLEASE READ THE ENTIRE POST before you comment or share your own thoughts. I'm up for having a discussion, but I ask that you not do so without getting the full context of my thoughts. Itâs a lot of information, and I did my best to break it down in a way that (I hope!!) is easy to understand.
CONTENT WARNING: due to the nature of the question at hand, I will be discussing or mentioning potentially triggering topics such as ***depression, suicidal ideation, dieting, homophobia, and substance abuse.*** Please look away if you are not in the right headspace to read about such topics.
Okay, let's rip the band-aid off now: I don't think Leona is clinically depressed.
Pause. Rewind. Take note of my careful wording there: clinically depressed. I don't think Leona is clinically depressed. What does that mean, and how does that relate to "being depressed"?
I think when people describe Leona as "depressed", they commonly mean that he "has depression", not that he is just feeling sad or has low self-esteem. By "having depression", I'm going to assume they are referring to "major depressive disorder", which is the technical term for the condition.
"It's just an abbreviation of the longer term. What's the issue with using 'depression'?â you're probably wondering. âYou understand that we mean major depressive disorder.â Well, equating the two does NOT a diagnosis make.
Mental conditions such as major depressive disorder are documented in a handbook known as the DSM (or the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). The latest version, the DSM-5-TR (5th edition with text revisions), was published in 2022. The DSM is a manual that sets forth criteria for each diagnosis in its pages. Of course, this includes major depressive disorderâand it may surprise you to learn that Leona does not meet its diagnostic criteria.
A diagnosis of "depression" (the term I will henceforth be using as shorthand for the disorder) is much more than having persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness, being unmotivated/lazy, and wanting to sleep often. (I bring up these three things specifically because they are the ones I see being pointed at most frequently to âproveâ the diagnosis.)
In order to be formally diagnosed, an individual must be experiencing at least 5 or more of the following symptoms during the same 2-week period:
Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day.
Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day.
Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day.
A slowing down of thought and a reduction of physical movement (observable by others, not merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down).
Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.
Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt nearly every day.
Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day.
Recurrent thoughts of death, recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide.
At least one of the symptoms should be either 1) depressed mood or 2) loss of interest or pleasure in activities they previously found enjoyable. Furthermore, the symptoms must cause what is known as "clinically significant distress", which is defined by impairment in important areas of functioning. This includes, but is not limited to, socialization, occupation, and/or education. The symptoms must also not be the result of substance abuse or another medical condition, and the individual must ever have experienced mania or hypomania.
Letâs briefly go through each criterion + additional documents and see what evidence there is or isnât to support it:
We do not have his medical records to cross reference, so for the sake of convenience letâs assume no underlying or additional medical conditions.
We must consider additional context about family, lifestyle, etc. which can confound his symptoms. For example, as a prince, Leona has grown up having most things done for him by servants. This is what he is used to. So when we observe Leona not doing basic things for himself (getting food, doing laundry, making his bed), how much of this can we truly attribute to an underlying condition and how much of this can we attribute to Leona being accustomed to a certain kind of lifestyle?
Leona (at least from what we know of) does not experience mania, nor is he depicted as taking mind or behavior altering substances.
Of the first two criteria, Leona must fit into one: either 1) depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, or 2) markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day. These depend on how you interpret his actions and behaviors. Personally, I donât think Leona strongly fits into 2 because he still has an interest in his hobbies like Magift/Spelldrive and playing chess (though his involvement in it varies depending on the context). I will concede that there is stronger evidence for 1 over 2, as Leona has definitely expressed sadness and despair regarding himself and his future prospects. It is these thoughts that drive him away from home and keep contact with his family at a minimum. It is these thoughts that prevent him from seeing himself as worthy or even capable of changeâa sentiment he shares in book 6, when he encourages Jamil but does not grant himself the same kindness or optimism. For this reason, we will go with the first criterion.
He has not experienced notable weight loss nor gain, nor a notable increase or decrease in appetite. Regarding his general diet, Leona has expressed a preference for meat and rejects vegetables. This by itself does not really provide any useful information in of itself; many people have this preference.
Leona does not experience a slowing down of thought. He is still very sharp and quick-witted in responding to his surroundings, especially in potentially dangerous ones, and coming up with an appropriate plan to counter. It can be argued that Leona has had a reduction in physical movement, as many characters often make remarks about how they perceive him as lazy or not doing much. However, this criterion actually refers to the speed at which one completes an activity and as far as I know, Leona is not said to be moving sluggishly, he only conducts himself in a manner that can be described as "lazily elegant". Even if we stretched the definition to encompass long-term goals he is putting off (like graduation), this criteria is still not counted for Leona since the wording used in the DSM-5-TR states âslowing down of thought AND reduction in physical movementâ must be present. In other words, both must be true, not just one of them.
Leona does seem to experience some level of fatigue or loss of energy. This could be one way of interpreting his desire to sleep excessively instead of tending to more meaningful matters (like class). Fatigue, in this case, can also refer to emotional or mental fatigue. The sleep, then, can serve as a means of escape from reality for Leona, but it does not indicate actual physical tiredness. Rather, the tiredness can be intangible. This is also a potential explanation for his lack of motivation when it comes to some activities, especially those that demand him to take charge.
Leona does appear to experience feelings of worthlessness, though perhaps not excessive or inappropriate guilt. In fact, I would wager Leona does not demonstrate the latter, although this could be attributed to the fact that we are not in his head and he does not open up to others about his feelings. For example, we still don't know what his feelings are on almost killing Ruggie in a fit of rage. This does not discredit this criterion though, as the wording in the DSM is âfeelings of worthlessness OR [âŠ] guiltâ meaning one or the other suffices. It is no secret that Leona seeks recognition for his skillsâsomething he was denied as a child and even put down for. While he is aware of his strengths, he has moments when he doubts himself (stating that he canât change, or giving up when he realizes his plans wonât work so whatâs the point in trying?), the contributions he can make (even when his older brother reassures him he can help their country), and encouragement from others (Jack telling him his play inspired him).
As I've said before, Leona does not have a diminished ability to think or concentrate. It has been shown to us time and time again that he doesn't do schoolwork not for lack of trying or lack of understanding, but because he thinks of himself as above it. Leona has already been tutored by the finest teachers royal money can buy, so he believes there is not much else for him to learn. He is also not shown to be indecisive--he can make decisions very quickly and can guide others or at least convince them to go along with him.
Leona does not have suicidal ideation or have recurring thoughts of committing suicide/death. While it's true that this is a game rated for ages 4+ (and therefore has restrictions on what content is and is not allowed in it), TWST has demonstrated to us that there are ways to imply suicidal ideation and other dark themes without explicitly saying it. (One notable example is Idia in late book 6, where he drops lines like "I'll go with you" and expresses dissatisfaction with "this world" to Ortho, who is known to be dead. To this, Ortho reassures him and encourages him to keep living. In fact, I could go on a whole tangent about how Idia better fits the criteria for major depressive disorder, but we're not going to get into that here.) The fact that TWST does not really imply this about Leona makes me think this is not true of him.
It can be said that the symptoms Leona does have are clinically significant, as his behavior is shown to have significant impact on his studies to the point where he was held back a grade. This was not because he did not know the material, but because he failed to find the motivation to attend class and to do his assignments. It also appears that Leona didn't really make an effort to work toward his future until book 7, when he actually talks his internship plans and about wanting to graduate.
We may guess that the symptoms persisted for two weeks or more (given Leonaâs history and involvement in the main story), but the frequency of the symptoms is unclear since the game controls what we see of Leona and what we donât.
Taking all of that into consideration, Leona does in fact exhibit depressive symptoms, but only 3 at most (I say âat mostâ because we have no idea about the true frequency at which some behaviors occur; we arenât with Leona 24/7, nor has he reported it to us) out of the 8 total criteria. Thatâs 2 short of a diagnosis.
âBut wait, thereâs a lot of information missing here! We donât have medical records, his weight and appetite changes, etc.â Thatâs trueâbut see, the main issue I take with diagnosing fictional characters in the first place is that we oftentimes do not know a character in detail enough to understand the full scope of their lives and symptoms. Noticing a few details is one thing and valid to an extent, but to evaluate an individual is not purely observational. This is particularly true for TWST characters, as even though there is plenty of content to refer back to for behavior, there is still a lack of really going into daily activities or deep feelings (beyond the one post-OB flashback for the OB boys). We cannot observe their behavior extensively. Because of this, tons of key criteria may not be visible to us from the audienceâs perspective, let alone a medical history or other data to consider for assessment. We will almost always have an incomplete profile of a fictional character. Health is holistic and not entirely based on what we as individuals see or on all anecdotal evidence.
Just as health considers all parts of the individual, we, too, must consider individual cases of depression. It is possible for depression to exist without a diagnosisâmany people (especially older adults), unfortunately, go undiagnosed for their condition. At the same time, it is possible for Leona to have depression which manifests in an atypical way. Each person with depression presents differently than the last, so I so not intend to make any blanket statements about the general population with this condition. The only statement I am making here is that based on my own interpretation of the current lore TWST has granted is, Leona Kingscholar does not satisfy the criteria for a formal clinical diagnosis, at least not for major depressive disorder as is defined by the DSM-5-TR.
Interestingly, Leona does fit the diagnostic criteria for a subclinical form of depression in a 1994 version of the DSM (IV). Minor depression or minor depressive disorder, colloquially known as âeveryday depressionâ, is defined as having 2â4 depressive symptoms persisting for more than 2 weeks. One of these symptoms must be either depressed mood or loss of interest. It should be noted that this terminology is no longer recognized, as new information is added and dropped from the manual all the time. The information is flexible based on the consensus of a panel of hundreds of experts. Older versions of the DSM can be horribly outdated and it is not advised to reference them over newer ones. (As an example, "homosexuality" was legitimately listed as a mental illness in the very first version of the DSM. Yikes. Thankfully, this was dropped from the DSM-II. Other conditions like "multiple personality disorder" are granted new names like "dissociative identity disorder" or reworked altogether as our studies and understanding of mental health and science improve. It is important to keep up with the research coming out and update our approaches accordingly.)
We do not currently have a label for Leonaâs situation aside from perhaps experiencing depressive episodes (periods of notable sadness lasting under 2 weeks) and exhibiting some depressive symptoms. I must stress that just because we lack a full-blown diagnosis, it doesnât mean that it doesnât impact his life. Leona is shown to very clearly be struggling with his mental health. He spends a lot of time in bed, typically cannot be motivated to attend class or do complete assignments, and has moments where he thinks very lowly of himself in spite of the confidence he exudes to others. What's more is that because Leona does not speak to others about what he's going through, it comes off as laziness or arrogance to his peers. Think of it this way: if you have a bad day and snap at a stranger or an acquaintance, the stranger/acquaintance is far less likely to grant you grace or forgiveness for your behavior compared to, say, a friend. They are not as familiar with you, so they will have less patience and are less likely to consider what you may be going through on a personal level. This also applies on a fandom level; if a fan is not actively reading between the lines, they, like Leona's peers, may miss the depressive symptoms he is displaying because they aren't looking for it. How many people can we say are close friends with Leona for him to open up to them about his circumstances? I would say Leona barely even lets his own dorm members be intimate enough with him to let them know about this part of himself. He has Savanaclaw backing him, but he probably does not talk to the mobs extensively. Ruggie is his errand boy, but I doubt Leona pours his heart out to him. And Jack is the newbie who did technically betray their dorm, so Leona might not trust him. Forget about people beyond his dorm. Even his family is not much better off; we've seen that Leona tends to brush off his brother's friendliness and attempts to make amends. There is no strong support system in place for him, which is tricky because Leona perpetuates it by keeping others at bay. In the light novel adaptation of book 2, Leona has an inner monologue about how he is afraid of letting others give him hope because it will encourage him to try again, only to fail another time. I imagine similar logic applies here; he is afraid of showing his vulnerable side because it might give him hope for change when he as late as book 6 expresses that he has given up on himself. I think that this is the detail about Leona most look to when they consider his mental health. The hallmark of depression is, after all, the feeling of perpetual sadness and despair itself. Most do not realize that other factors are considered.
From a clinical lens, it is not âobvious" that Leona is depressed. However, I understand why the prevailing sentiment tends to skew in the opposite direction. For the layman, it may be difficult to distinguish what is and is not clinically significant enough to warrant an actual diagnosis. Again, most will cite the same three pieces of information to support the depression reading: Leona's irritability, his unwillingness to participate, and the rejection he experienced as a child (which has now manifested as self-doubt and low self-esteem). Characters are often judged based on fans' own experiences, and this naturally comes with biases and subjectivity. Thus, some fans may project their own understanding or preconceived notions of what the "typical" depressed person acts like in their head onto Leona. This is normal human empathy at play. I believe that other fans see depression in Leona either because they experience it themselves or are familiar with someone in the same shoes. It can be difficult, and at times we can find solace and solidarity in fiction, especially if we find a character that âspeaks to usâ and seems relatable. That character may be Leona for some people. If you see do see him in this light or relate to his situation, Iâm not invalidating your feelings. On the contrary, I'm happy that you were able to find comfort in him and that a piece of media you love can serve as a coping mechanism. You keep on doing you!
It is at this point that I will reiterate what I said at the start with a little extra nuance: I do not think Leona clinically depressed BUT I do believe he has depressive symptoms and poor mental health as the result of his cumulative circumstances. It is possible for him to have major depressive disorder, but we cannot determine this for certain with the information available to us right now. We are still missing several key components that would typically be considered in the evaluation process.
I think it's important to step back from focusing on labels and instead focus on the individual experience, and how you can still grow as a person and not let a perceived label define you. Leona is definitely working on himself! Changing, particularly changing a deeply ingrained mindset, takes much time and effort. We may not see the progress since Leona tends to hide it and/or we have limited intractions with him. We may not always see giant strides because the process is difficult. Even so, Leona is trying to jump over those mental and emotional hurdles. He's putting his all back into Magift/Spelldrive training. He's attending classes and doing the assignments. He's going home for the holidays. He has an internship planned. He wants to graduate. I've enjoyed following Leona's journey of growth and self-development and seeing all the intense discussion surrounding that. It all comes from a place of love and wanting to support the characters we care about, no matter how we may individually view him.
#twst#twisted wonderland#Leona Kingscholar#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#twst character analysis#twisted wonderland character analysis#notes from the writing raven#question#tw//depression#tw//suicidal ideation#tw//suicide#twst analysis#twisted wonderland analysis#Cheka Kingscholar#Falena Kingscholar#Farena Kingscholar#tw//substance abuse#tw//dieting#Jamil Viper#Idia Shroud#Ruggie Bucchi#Jack Howl#Savanaclaw#tw//homophobia
290 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello there! I've been a fan of your work for a while now and let me just say, your original works and characters have me absolutely captivated! (Your yandere outlaw is one of my top favorite fictional characters! And your yandere cult leader is rapidly rising in the ranks đ) You put so much detail into all your writing and you really delve deep into the psychology and personality of every one of them so beautifully, not to mention how diverse they all are from one another. Each and every one has such dimension and they're so believable in their actions and reactions! (And can I just say I think it's very clever that your yandere!Milf/Dilf's names start with the acronym's initial)
And your MCs are also quite vibrant and while they remain easily relatable they still have distinct traits that the characters get attached to. Thank you for making and sharing these amazing stories and characters with us, it really makes my day whenever I see you've posted something new.
Now, I know this ask is getting pretty lengthy (sorry about that ^^" I tend to ramble) but I was going through your Yan!Dilf works again and I wanted to ask, how would Dominic react if his darling was someone who's maybe dealt with manipulative people in the past or is highly emotionally intelligent and observant who could tell he wasn't being entirely genuine? But instead of pulling away from him they try to understand what he wants from them and was open about it? Would he ever even become obsessed with someone like that or allow that kind of situation to happen or is he too cautious for it to be possible?
I know you've had a lot of asks so please don't feel obligated to answer this! But in any case thank you again for sharing your works and I hope you have a wonderful wonderful day! đđ«
My Lovely, you have positively touched my soul with your endearing sentiments ! Truly, you have made my day and I cannot thank you enough for being such a loyal enthusiast of my work, your time is valued more than I can ever hope to express <3.
Your question is an incredibly fascinating one, my Dear; thank you for sharing it with us ! I wish you the happiest and most prosperous of days, Sweetie ^^
TW: Manipulation, Dominic Being Dominic, Vulnerability, No Pronouns Used For Reader Except 'You'.
⥠Dominic is, as you suggested, initially extremely cautious around you. However, he knows he can't just drop you like a sack of potatoes; it would be far too obvious to the people around him, which would surely cause others to find him out as the serpent he is if they ever went digging around his character.
⥠But, when you show him, gradually, like a keeper feeding a feral animal, that your endeavour is not to oust him as an un-human but rather to understand what made him like this in the first place (and all the lace and frills that come with such a monumental task), he regards you...differently than he did before.
⥠Sure, he thought you were very attractive and that you could offer him something other than the resplendence his life is steeped in, but now...
⥠He feels exposed. Seen. Vulnerable.
⥠All things he tries to push back against. Things he tries to bury beneath a grandiose tale of a childhood spent in the most accommodating of educational establishments, lavish mansions and the lap of luxury.
⥠He tries to lead you a merry dance down a version of his life that he wants you to see, rebuttaling your attempts at making him crack.
⥠You tell him you can see past that. He, feeling his eye twitch, believes you.
⥠It will take a long, long time to get Dominic even close to admitting a scintilla of how his psyche works. Or, rather, doesn't work.
⥠And it's only if you manage to grind away at his need to hide his most precious secret - the parasite that wears his skin and controls his mind - that he'll open up.
⥠Fractionally. Piecemeal. But he opens up, nonetheless.
⥠He'll grow to love you in ways unfathomable even to him.
⥠If you thought he was bad without having a background in combatting the manipulation of others, he is insidious now.
⥠You become to him what he could never be for himself; a safe haven. The only person from which he does not hide.
⥠Sure, he keeps the more...dangerous aspects of his personality hidden for a lot longer than others, but you can topple these columns, can shake Dominic from his perch forged from the ivory of a devil's horns.
⥠You can tame him in ways unimaginable. You have only to see him for who - what - he truly is.
Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)
Masterlist Yandere AI Masterlist Masterpost
AO3 Wattpad Tumblr Backup Account
#sweet as an angel#yandere#male yandere#yandere male#original yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#yandere x darling#yandere oc#yandere oc x reader#yandere dilf#yandere dilf x reader#yandere writing#yandere blog#tw yandere#original writing#writers on tumblr
178 notes
·
View notes