#I think ultimately they would have to die
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SPOILERS!!!
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Okay, I have a tiiiny question on Eva's execution. Why did Cara's body (or a dummy of it) was used to give her hope that she can escape? Why not... Wolfgang's? It would make more sense, no? First of all, it would be perfect to disturb the class: look, this is your dead classmate! Long time no see, huh? Oh, let's have his killer accidentally rip off his arm while trying to escape!
Secondly, it could mess with Eva. Imagine, you kill some guy, because a) he's an ultimate lawyer and b) he kinda bullies you. You hate him, because he made everyone hate you and put you in the most vulnerable position during the killing game, you hate his silly optimism and belief in people. Then you're about to be executed and you see him leading a hand, giving you a chance to be saved. Wouldn't you be mad a little? This motherfucker is the reason you have problems and now he wants to help? Uh-hum, sure.
But what are you left with? You grab his hand, only to accidentally rip it off and fall straight to the flame. Imagine thinking in your last moment: "This bitch made everything to make me die".
Woah. Cool!
But instead, they use Cara. Why?
I don't think they made it without any purpose (though, there is such possibility). Maybe, Cara and Eva related somehow? Could they knew each other?
It would be interesting to hear your thoughts! :)
#project eden's garden#project: eden's garden#project edens garden#p:eg#p:eg spoilers#p:eg chapter 1#eva tsunaka#cara koskinen
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Good Intentions
See Me Through You Fic
Synopsis: An argument between you and your twin ultimately leads to an argument between you and your fiancé who calls you out about your actions and tells you how being overprotective isn't a good thing
Pairing: Fiancé!Joe Burrow x Fiancée!Reader
Series Masterlist
Requested by: by boo @hoodharlow 💕
Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere
AN: This takes place during Ja'Marr's rookie season. You are still at LSU and taking summer classes
The last thing your twin ever wanted to do was hurt your feelings, but all in all he had had enough and had reached his limit when it came to you being overprotective.
At this point, it was honestly suffocating.
It had been this way since the two of you were born and although Ja'Marr was grateful to be able to get along with his sibling since he knew not everyone did, something had to give. Yes, the two of you would talk to each other multiple times a day, but it seemed as if his phone had been ringing nonstop since he landed in Cincinnati.
As soon as he was going to text you and tell you that he wanted to talk about the situation, his phone was ringing indicating that it was you….
Again.
Taking a deep breath, Ja'Marr answered.
“Yes, Pebbles?”
“Bam Bam! Are you okay? How's everything going? I miss you. Did you eat breakfast already and take your vitamins?”
“I'm fine. I was fine when you called me two hours ago too…. at six in the morning. I miss you too. And yes to both of those questions.”
“It's just so weird not having you here and I hate it. I'm so proud of you, though. I always knew you would make it to the NFL because I saw your potential and how good you were. What do you have planned for today?” You asked as you were currently at the nail salon trying to decide on the color that you wanted.
You would be reunited with both your brother and fiancé in three weeks and you had been counting down until the last minute.
“Same plan that I had two hours ago. Just trying to get settled. Go explore the city a little bit.”
“Okay, well I guess I'll let you do that. I like how you're still getting an early start.” You told him as it was still barely eight in the morning.
“Wait, Pebbles can we talk?”
“We'll talk later when I call you back. I'm at the nail salon. Give me like an hour or two. They're ready for me. Love you!”
“Love you too.” Ja'Marr quietly said before the two of you hung up and he quickly looked up at Joe who was sitting across from him and half asleep himself since you had requested once again for him to head over to Ja'Marr's to check on him.
“You have got to tell her because this is insane. I feel like I've seen you more in the past week than I did my whole two years at LSU.” Joe told him as he shook his head.
“I just… I don't want to make her feel bad because I know she means well.”
“But this cannot keep happening. I'm surprised she hasn't told me to make you move in with me so I can keep an eye on you. That's probably going to happen by the end of the day.”
“I'll talk to her once she calls me back later.” Ja'Marr replied, but if he was being honest he was actually dreading this conversation.
“You mean in five minutes?” Joe asked and Ja'Marr couldn't help but to laugh.
“I should time it and see how long it takes for her to actually do it.”
“Well in the meantime, I'm going back to sleep. But I know I won't be able to sleep for long before she's calling me back too.” Joe said as he got up and grabbed his keys making his way towards the door.
“I just hope she doesn't take it the wrong way.”
“I think everything will die down once she's actually here in person.”
—
When you had finally gotten out of the nail salon after admiring them and taking multiple pictures and had got settled in your car, you called Joe to see what he was up to and to also check on your brother. It was hard not being able to be with your brother as well as your fiancé since you had gotten accustomed to having both of them.
You were taking a few summer classes which delayed you spending time with him in Cincinnati. Luckily, you only had a few weeks left until you would be able to.
“Hi baby! My nails are pink! I took a picture and sent it to you.” You proudly told Joe as he had you on speaker and was looking at the picture as you were telling him.
“I love them. Can't wait to feel them scratching down my back.”
“I… behave yourself!”
“I am behaving! I can't help that I miss my girl.”
“Aww, I miss you too. I just wanted to take this class so it will lessen my load come next semester. Anyway, babe, can you go and check on Ja'Marr?” You sweetly asked and Joe couldn't help but to roll his eyes and was thankful that it wasn't a facetime call. He knew that it was only a matter of time.
“Baby, I was literally just over there three hours ago. I'm not going over there again.” Joe told you as he was trying to make himself a smoothie and started to get ingredients out of the fridge.
“But I have to know if he's okay!”
“Y/N, are you going to let him be an adult or…?”
“He's my baby brother! And you told me that you would look out for him once he got to Cincy. And since when is he an adult?! He is still three in my eyes!”
“Princess, I am looking out for him, but you are being extremely overprotective and Ja'Marr is scared to say anything because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings. How long are you going to try and hold his hand for? And he became an adult the minute that he turned eighteen.”
“If he had a problem with me calling him so much, he would tell me. He tells me everything.” You said and Joe scoffed.
“Uh? What was that sound for? See, you're the youngest so you probably don't understand! I have been looking out for him since forever! I have so many responsibilities on my shoulders being the oldest.”
“Older by three minutes. And you need to calm down and let him be. You are in the wrong here, but won't admit it. Nothing wrong with checking on him, but babe this is borderline obsessive.” Joe explained to you as he was now cutting up the fruit he wanted to put in his smoothie.
“Joey, what the hell!? He's the only sibling I have.”
“I'm your fiancé and I'm always going to be honest with you. I don't care if it's something you don't want to hear or agree with.”
“There is literally nothing wrong with what I'm doing.”
Joe couldn't help but to roll his eyes once more.
“Okay, baby. Since you don't think it's bothering him, hang up and call him. Then call me back and tell me what he says.”
“Fine, you’ll see.” You said as you shrugged even though Joe couldn't see you.
Once you hung up with him, you called your twin and he didn't even give you a proper greeting before he started to go off on you.
“Y/N, what could you possibly ask me about now?”
“Whoa, what's the attitude for? And I thought you wanted to talk to me? You always want to talk to me.” You asked as you were caught off guard.
“Don't you have class, or practice, or SOMETHING that you can occupy your time with instead of calling me every five minutes?”
“I… Ja'Marr I just want to make sure you’re okay. You're my baby brother and my twin. Only one I have.”
“Yes, I know and you will NOT let me fucking breathe. Like got damn. I've only been here a damn week and all of my calls are basically from you every two minutes. Yes, Joe is checking on me and making sure I'm good. But I don't need a babysitter. He's also getting annoyed because you tell him to come and check on me ten times a day!” Ja'Marr told you unable to hold back any longer.
“But… you turned your location off. I need to know where you are. You never turn it off. What's up with that?”
“NO YOU DON'T. I'm good, that's all you need to know. All you have been doing ever since I got drafted was be extremely overprotective! Mom and dad aren't even this bad.” He told you as he was being completely honest.
It was quiet for a few seconds before you decided to say anything, obviously hurt by his reaction.
“If I'm bothering you, I'll stop. I just miss you is all. But I can see that I'm causing more harm than good. So I'll hang up now.” You said with tears threatening to fall from your eyes.
“Wait, Pebbles, I just…” Now Ja'Marr was regretting his approach because he now knew for a fact that he had hurt your feelings which he was trying to avoid doing.
“Bye, have a good rest of your day.”
You didn't give him a chance to finish as you quickly hung up and wiped away the tears that did end up falling. Figuring that you were also probably bothering your fiancé just as Ja'Marr mentioned, you decided to send him a text instead of calling him again.
You- I'll stop asking for you to check on him
Joey- Baby, I don't mind checking on him. Just tone it down a little bit. I promise you that he's okay. If he wasn’t, you would be the first person I told.
You- No, I'm not asking anymore at all. If he wants to talk to me, he will and I'll leave it at that. I guess I'm bothering you too so I'll let you be. Talk to you whenever.
Joey- Princess, stop being ridiculous. You aren't bothering me.
You- Ja'Marr said otherwise so goodnight
“Shit.” Joe muttered underneath his breath before typing a response back to you.
Joey- It is literally 11 in the morning and you're being petty
You- I can tell time, goodnight like I said
For the rest of the day, your phone had been blown up by Joe but you weren't budging. Ja’Marr had been eerily quiet, but you definitely weren't about to say anything to him.
He wanted space so that was what he was going to get.
If he felt like you were being extremely overprotective and also bothering Joe with your antics, you were simply going to keep your distance.
About a week had passed and Ja'Marr honestly felt weird.
He hadn't talked to his big sister and since it was out of the ordinary, when certain things happened he didn't have anyone he would immediately run and tell about it.
That person had been you.
He had been leaving you messages here and there with no response from you.
Joe wasn't any better and you would be sending him one word answers to his text messages while declining his facetime calls despite him wanting to call a truce.
He came to the conclusion that you were obviously still hurt by the argument that had taken place, but he needed to fix this before you came to see him in two weeks.
Well, if you still wanted to see him, that is.
Because as of right now he wasn't so sure.
It was now around six in the evening when you and Erin had just gotten back from going shopping and you had begun to put away your clothes in your closet when you heard Erin's phone ring as she was sitting on your bed.
“Oh no.” She breathed out and you looked at her in confusion.
“What?”
“Your baby daddy is calling me.” She told you and you quickly rolled your eyes.
One thing about Joe is if he knew you were mad at him, nine times out of ten he's calling Erin to check on you because he knows that you'll keep ignoring him.
“I'm not talking to him right now.”
“Wait, didn’t you tell him goodnight at 11 in the morning the other day?” She asked while laughing.
“Yes, and I meant it.”
“Let’s see what he wants.” Erin replied as you quickly shook your head no before exclaiming it.
“NO!”
“Too late. Hi Joey!” Erin said as she waved at him with you quickly rolling your eyes.
Great, it was a facetime call too.
“Hey Erin, where's Y/N?”
“In front of me and I told her to call you so that the two of you could make up but she's being stubborn.” She told him and you promptly rolled your eyes.
“Can you pass her the phone?” He politely asked and she quickly nodded.
“Sure.”
It took a minute for you to take the phone from her, but once you did, you didn't greet your fiancé but simply stared at him.
“Baby….”
“What? What do you want?”
“Lose the attitude. And I’m just checking on you, have you talked to your twin at all?”
“Nope, and I don't plan on it. He asked me if I had something to occupy my time with instead of bothering him and here we are. And I thought I told you goodnight already?”
“Princess, he wants to talk to you and apologize but you wouldn't know that since apparently you've been ignoring him. And you told me that damn near a week ago. We communicate with each other in this relationship and this needs to end tonight.”
“Okay, can I get back to watching my shows now?” You asked as you had now moved from your room to the living room and turned on Netflix with Erin behind you.
“No, talk to him first and then we need to talk.”
“Well I don't know how that's going to happen because I'm not calling him.”
“There's no need to, he's right here.” Joe told you and quickly passed the phone to Ja'Marr.
“Wait, what?”
“Pebbles….”
“Wow, the minute I say I'm going to stop calling you, look who decides to come crawling back?” You told him and Ja'Marr quickly rolled his eyes.
“You need to shut your petty ass up so I can apologize.”
“I will jump through this phone and tackle you. Fuck a D-line.” You shot back and he let out a deep sigh.
“Like I was saying because I am ignoring that last statement. I never meant to hurt your feelings and it did come out kind of harsh.”
“Kind of? That's putting it lightly.” You muttered as you were deciding which show you wanted to catch up on.
“Y/N!”
“I'm just telling it like it is.”
“Anyway, I'm sorry but we have got to come to a compromise because we can't keep doing this.”
You sighed before answering him, but quickly nodded in agreement.
“I'm sorry too, but the only way I'm forgiving you is if you door dash me some food.”
“Already done. Honey old bay wings, all flats. Should be there in the next ten minutes.”
“Oh, you are definitely trying to get back on my good side. But on a serious note, I promise to give you more space and I never want you to feel like I'm suffocating you. I just… it's kinda lonely here now. I do have Erin and Alisha but…. I have literally never been away from you.” You confessed as Ja'Marr nodded.
“I know and it's going to take some time for us to adjust. But we'll get there. We good now?”
“Yes, we're good.”
“Now stop being a petty ass fiancée to my best friend.” Ja'Marr said as he eyed you and handed Joe back the phone.
“Babe?”
“Yes, princess?”
“I'm sorry and you know I love you. And yes I need to work on my communication when it comes to you and stop shutting you out.” You told him while you got up off the couch to grab a drink from the fridge.
“I don't know how many times that I have to remind you that I'm not him. I care about how you feel and am always willing to meet you halfway. I asked you to marry me for a reason. I love you too.”
“Sometimes I swear I don't deserve you.” You whispered and Joe simply shook his head.
“We deserve each other and we're going to continue to make our relationship stronger because once I slip that ring on your finger next summer, that's it. You're mine forever and whatever problems may arise, we simply have to figure it out together. We're a team, okay?”
“Okay.” You quietly said as you smiled at him.
"See you in two weeks, princess?” Joe asked with excitement dripping from his voice.
“Two weeks and not a day more.”
#joe burrow#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow x black reader#joe burrow angst#joe burrow imagine#joe burrow fanfic#joe burrow fanfiction#joe burrow x you#joe shiesty#joey burrow#nfl imagine
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everyone's joking about a lesbian love triangle being the focus of rhaenyra/alicent/mysaria's stories in hotd s3 but that will literally be what happens when mysaria acts to uphold and support the image of rhaenyra as queen (or rhaenyra's duty) and alicent is kept prisoner (or a hidden but unavoidable reminder of rhaenyra's love). and so the love triangle will serve to represent rhaenyra's internal conflict between love and duty
#and if you are me and subscribe to the theory that alicent will escape to dragonstone with rhaenyra after the riots in KL#then rhaenyra chooses alicent/love#i think the book page foreshadows this attempt at escape#“traveling across the narrow to flee a war of dragons”#alicent going to dragonstone with rhaenyra would also totally recontextualize rhaenyra selling her crown to pay for passage#rhaenyra abandons this ultimate symbol of her duty for a final chance at happiness with alicent#and then there's the horrible irony of the audience already knowing that aegon ii has taken dragonstone as they sail toward the island#knowing that rhaenyra and alicent could never actually be physically liberated from the system of patriarchal violence they exist in#but by that point they have both mentally liberated themselves from it#rhaenyra selling her crown and alicent finally accepting rhaenyra's offer to run away and totally abandoning duty#and so the love was important and valuable in the sense that they both die understanding that they couldn't change the part they played#but they know now that they had this love that sustained them despite the plotting and scheming and violence#and the love will be forgotten by history but not by them and in that their love will finally be free#crazy actually that they decided to do this shit with a game of thrones prequel#hotd#alicent hightower#hotd spoilers#rhaenicent#rhaenyra targaryen#house of the dragon#also they are having gay sex on the boat to dragonstone i saw it in a vision
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I know we’ve been begging for a Murph DM season for years now and I would still kill to see it but idk man I think we’ve been dropping the ball. Something about Zac Oyama behind that screen looked right
#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy spoilers#zac oyama#brian murphy#brennan lee mulligan#intrepid heroes#honestly I would die to see any of the intrepid heroes dm on d20 and get to use that production budget#but Zac actually sorta led Beardsley to a rational enough place in truly the wildest moment I’ve ever seen#and even though he was clearly still doing a bit it really made me curious what a campaign in d20’s style from him would look like#it feels like the ultimate love letter to have one of them dm for brennan’s world at the series he built#it made Brennan so emotional to see Matt play in his world I can only imagine how proud he’d feel to see one of the intrepid heroes do it#(also yes I do think each and every one of them would look hot running shit and ruining brennan’s life)#anyway! I love when new people come to play or take on new roles! more please!
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@doctorbluesmanreturns so true, so true!
The Big Bad Wolf and his commitment to self-improvement!
book titles all courtesy of @meso-mijali who is funnier than me:
Mirror Mirror: 10 Steps to the Fairest You 7 Dwarves' 7 Steps to Romance, by Doc Red Riding Hood and You: Finding Your Inner Child and Learning to Trust Again Into the Woods: CPTSD and the Self Gnolls, Trolls & Wolves: It's what's inside that matters
(+ "Meyers Briggs: we aren't astrology for STEM, honest!" which didn't quite make it in, but assume it's one of the untitled books u.u)
#10th kingdom#tenth kingdom#the 10th kingdom#wolf#prince wendell#god i love this series#i'm stressed enough that i really should start either a rewatch or a reread of it... i think it's exactly what i need#i - much like wolf - would die for virginia lewis#however my brain has been mush lately and all i have the brain power for is mindlessly binging whose line is it anyway while i draw ;;;#if you've never watched the 10th kingdom consider this my enthusiastic endorsement it's one of my ultimate comfort media - book or show#adorable silly campy twisted fairytales
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what's so interesting is that agatha and nicky clearly had their cons well-oiled, and at the end it seems they even started turning their song into a part of it as well, like i don't think that was the first time nicky sang that song for an audience and they used it to lure witches (i do think it's the first time that it /technically/ didn't work), and how after nicky died it continued to gain popularity and be so well-known it became a legend, and along with that agatha being known as the only survivor of the road and people (like billy) seeking her out to walk it or just for knowledge of it. and i think that had been the idea when they first started using it as a con. making it so they no longer had to travel and scavenge, using it as a lure to bring the witches to them in order to keep nicky alive, but only one small misstep and rio got him anyway
and then thinking about how lorna, who had a generational curse placed upon her family that is going to kill both her and her daughter and who desperately wants to see her daughter survive, heard this song and created her own version to use as a protection spell for her daughter and, like agatha did before her, she made her version so well-known and so popular that years and years after death it's still protecting her daughter, until ultimately her daughter was finally able to use it to break the curse and save herself
idk just.. they're like two sides of the same coin, or distorted mirrors of each other
agathas love was so powerful and so strong that death gave nicky time
lornas love was so powerful and so strong that the ballad gave alice time and even freed her
if nicky hadnt been taken that night, could it have eventually freed him as well? rio said agatha used the dark magic of the darkhold to hide herself from rio, so was that the end goal? they'd continue to lure witches to both keep nicky alive and to have agatha become powerful enough to forever keep them hidden?
#agatha all along#aaa spoilers#agatha harkness#nicholas scratch#alice wu gulliver#lorna wu#txt#me before the finale: and i'll save this song to use the lyrics to make gifsets of agatha x rio since i'll finally have more scenes to use#me after the finale: lorna/alice and agatha/nicholas parallels let's goooo#and there's something so poetic about how alice died too#like the song worked for her in ways it could never have worked for nicky#the song saved her like it never could nicky and like it was supposed to for nicky#and ultimately she dies the same as all the witches who had been drained to keep nicky living#do you think instead of just a loss of control agathas grief and bitterness chose to take from alice#because why should what was meant to save nicky save her instead?#i wonder if that moment when she watches it fizzle does she think of lorna?#does hearing nicky's voice allow her to see the similarities from a different perspective instead of through her grief#through her love of her son and connect it to lorna's love of her daughter? their struggle was the same for as much as it was different#idk it's just... agatha was planning to drain them from the start#why was /this/ one different. why did she have that look on her face after#especially after being confronted with her own mother who would have seen her die
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"I'm gonna kick your ass on N64 version of Rainbow road. We are gonna playing on 150cc so even those who haven't played can have a chance. So we shall see who truly has more skills Gabe." Skyfire stated.
"I do also have Castle Crashers-A personal favorite of mine-, Smash Ultimate, Kirby Star Allies, Kirby's Return to Dreamland Delux and Minecraft. That's just my multiplayer games. Cause I don't think y'all want to see me kill one really hard boss a bunch of times." They added "Or die to grey prince zote as I try and beat pantheon three but we don't talk about that."
"So that is why these 'dreepy' like me throwing them. So I have doomed myself to their constant attention." Gloom realized, but she didn't seem any upset about it as her words would convey. Her words would be more undermined as the zorua demanded pats which she gave and even picked one up begrudgingly.
"That explanation does not explain the larger one's fondness towards me. For I don't think I have done something worthy of earning its respect." Gloom shared, as the dragapult nuzzled Gloom's neck.
//The dragapult just sees Gloom already taking care of Firework, helping out the zoroarks witht he zorua and taking care of the dreepy and was like 'wow that's an odd looking drakloak'. Doesn't help that Gloom has had zorua on her head and the dreepy tend to rest there.//
//So yeah if Gloom were a pokemon she'd be a dragapult or drakloak//
//@time-travel-trio
.mm..I heard yellin'...
-R@ym0nd
Skyfire was the first to make their way inside the station in time to hear Raymond.
"There was an issue, it's been dealt with though. I'll explain more to you later. But for now we're having guests over for the night for a sleepover. Well after I patch up myself and Meta here." Skyfire explained, motioning to the rather unhappy orb in their arms.
Arceus trotted up to Skyfire, the bandaged wound on their stomach was seemingly healing well from how more energetic Arceus seemed. The small equine creature bumped its head on Skyfire's side since its height could barely reach Skyfire's chest.
//@time-travel-trio
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writing post veilguard solas as theeeeee clingiest most reassurance-starved man in the world who literally needs to hold lavellans hand every second of the day for the next 6 years or he WILL fall untethered in the literal abyss of despair he willingly walked into in the end.
#datv#datv spoilers#not in a cute hurt/comfort way btw like in an unpleasant distressing s******* way <3#i do think the solavellan ending is a happy one ultimately but it is a happiness that will have to (and will ! one day) be EARNED#with a lot of pain. and honesty. and terrible conversations.#they didnt walk off into the sunset they literally went to SILENT HILL. LOL. WHO ELSE IS DOING IT LIKE THEMMMMMMM THEY MAKE ME SO CRAZYYYYY#god. anyway. genuinely will die for my beliefs on this one#him never initiating intimacy in dai but always reacting soooo severely to it just screams touch starved right off the jump#he holds himself back bc if he lets himself he wouldnt stop. as we have very much seen with the mythal nightmare divorce arc in datv#but literally what possible reason would there be to hold back after datv. nothing. lavellan is the only thing he CAN hold on to#that isnt the face to face reality of all his innumerable sins and regrets lol#man. writing solavellan fanfic in 2024 we are so fucking back babes.
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Are there any other wizarding families that are underexplored in canon and pique your interest in a similar way to the Blacks?
This is a unique function of what food my brain worms like to eat, but no one's doing it like the Blacks. The drama? The intrigue? The Gothic horror? The prodigal sons and lost daughters and killers and sinners and martyrs and saints? The wizard Catholicism of it all? The story of the House of Black is the best book never written.
#i do think the potters could benefit from fleshing out#like harry's got no cousins or grandparents on his dad's side and that's weird to me#because his parents were... 22? so... how early did james's parents die? and how? because they're not old enough for natural causes#though to be honest. if i could add one backstory to canon it wouldn't be the potters OR the blacks#it would be peter pettigrew and the story of his betrayal#most important decision in the whole fucking series. lynchpin of the novels' decade-spanning plot#and it's like. whoops. motivation machine broke!#WHY did he do it? we have no mcfucking clue#the potters and blacks are cool to think about but ultimately just extra dressing for the plot#understanding peter pettigrew is crucial to understanding why the novels happen and we simply don't!#EDIT: just remembered the pottermore canon that the Potters have james when they're much older and that's why they're not around#that's not satisfying to me for 2 reasons 1: wizards canonically have longer-than-normal lifespans#and 2: doesn't explain how/why the Evanses disappear after Lily's death#like I'm not saying they COULDN'T die — obviously could! my grandparents were all dead before my 20s#but that was like. cancer. and in one case aggressively accelerated liver failure#just like a throwaway line or something to clear it up would've been cool#since it's not so much a plot hole as a plot pothole#we can get over it but shit's smoother without
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it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao
#i mean it’s hardly surprising given what we now know#she did all that awful shit and wasn’t even charmed#like i see people talk about how stupid miquella is because of this plan to essentially trap radahn#but that also makes malenia look stupid af too#‘go to caelid and kill radahn so i can marry him’ ans she was like sure#miquella wanted the one guy in the lands between who loves war and fighting to be his consort for his age of peace and compassion…#what a genius he is.#makes me wonder why he even needs some heavy weight to keep order for him when he can just charm people into submission#was radahn just there as a ceremonial position?#oh wait i forgot miquella thinks he’s super kind so that’s why he wants him#miq learnt about the gravity magic horse thing and swooned#honestly still can’t get over how incredibly stupid the twins look after the dlc#i think people like to imagine malenia was charmed just because it makes it all look slightly better on her part#like they are just making excuses for her#but holy shit the fact she was all but willing to fucking die so miquella could bag radahn..#what a thing to die for lmao#and he was apparently present after the battle? but didn’t do anything to help either radahn nor malenia?#instead he was helping a random redmane?#he obviously knew malenia had bloomed but ultimately didn’t care i guess#kind of like ‘oh well if she’s still alive when I get back i’ll deal with it then’#honestly wish miquella had just died in that cocoon at this point#tbh he doesn’t really do much in the dlc anyway they could have made it more about messmer and marika#hell bring melina into it please that would have been more interesting at this point#we didn’t need the dubcon incest plot micheal you could have left that one in the drafts#i gotta get this out of my head it’s driving me nuts#seriously need to move on from this game for my own sanity
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My personal feeling is that orignally Quirk counseling wasn't meant to be a big deal.
The chapters in which it comes up are: Chap 22 (a random line), chap 165 (not directly mentioned as they merely talk of counseling not of Quirk counseling), chap 226 (2 lines which are cut in the anime), chap 370 (a mention), chap 392 (it's not directly mentioned, we can only speculate the woman is there to give it), chap 430 (where all of sudden it seems the solution to all the problems) and chap 431 (where we're vaguely explained how the program works).
All this to say... Quirk counseling in the story wasn't a big deal until they decided it was the solution to all the problems, and during the Remedial Course Arc it wasn't even directly mentioned.
I think the remedial course arc was set up to help Shouto to deal with his own Villain.
Midoriya and Uraraka took part to the Shie Hassaikai arc. In it Midoriya deals with Eri (who's a child who can't control her powers and is exploited by an adult) and this could have helped him to deal with Tomura, while Uraraka deals with Nighteye's death and this helps her to move from the mindsetting "I want to be a Hero to help my parents" to the "I want to be a Hero to save people as I don't want to see anyone die" which might have helped her to deal with Himiko (who, after Jin's death, will be afraid Heroes are out to kill her).
Shouto wasn't in this arc so he couldn't learn anything to help him to deal with his Villain, so the Remedial Course arc, who comes immediately after the Shie Hassaikai arc seems there exactly for this reason.
I loved this speech from Gang Orca.
It remarks on the importance of creating a connection and it would have been important if Touya and Shouto could connect.
In the past Shouto already had a similiar discussion with Midoriya (in the arc that will see him meeting with Touya for the first time).
Kouta, who hates Hero society, can be viewed as a stand in for Tomura but also for Touya. In this exchange Shouto in the end told Midoriya he shouldn't butt in, as the situation is delicate.
One might see the Remedial course arc as an evolution of all this, the kids in it too have problems with society but Shouto this time is told he has to engage, that he can't just say, it's a delicate topic, I won't butt in because he has to 'save' those kids.
It would stand in parallel with how Shouto understood that Rei snapped and attacked him because she was driven to a corner and ultimately decided to engage with her.
The story seems to want to build up an arc for Shouto in which he'll understand if his brother turned into aVillain was because he snapped because he couldn't take it anymore, and that if he wants to stop him he has to engage and connect his heart with him, not bare his fangs at him and fight him like any other Hero would have done.
And then instead what we have when Shouto faces Touya?
A fight, Shouto being miserable but not connecting with Touya at all...
And why is that? Because the story needed so (I've discussed about it more in details here).
However, since Horikoshi decides Tomura, Touya and Himiko can't be saved, in order for the story to have a positive ending he needed to prove the FUTURE Tomura, Touya and Himiko would be now saved so enter Quirk counseling again, who only needed to be polished a bit by Uraraka and be joined by well meaning people without the slightest preparation to deal with kids with problems to work like a charm and stop what? half of the kids with Quirk problems to turn into Villains? The way they present it as the most essential initiative seems to imply they could be even more than a half.
Awesome how Uraraka could turn a flawed program into a perfect one and save the day. Too bad they hadn't thought at it sooner, isn't it?
Overall, I do get Horikoshi's idea but I this it's a bad one.
If Quirk counseling had to be the secret weapon to save the world... well, it needed to be a more integrant part in the story and a part of Uraraka's story.
So I don't think it's so much that Shouto was cut from it due to Horikoshi needing something for Uraraka to do... but that Shouto ended up cut from it when Horikoshi decided that no, Shouto wouldn't manage to connect his heart with his brother during the battle and Uraraka wouldn't manage to avoid having another person dying in front of her while she's helpless (actually let's give her a bigger trauma and make Himiko die to save her).
But with the Villains dying Horikoshi needed someone to save so what about saving the new generation of future Villains none of his readers cared about because they didn't exist yet?
But Shouto couldn't be involved because he now have enough to deal with due to the fallout of his family drama and Midoriya also has enough to deal with due to losing OFA so let's toss the burden on Uraraka who only lost Himiko.
Really, to me it feels more like Horikoshi went by exclusion than by logic.
Of course it's also possible I'm just being bitter. I don't like the idea to murder the Villains and I don't like the idea to entrust with a pollyannaish optimism the Quirk counseling to people who are well meaning but not trained at all into spotting and helping kids with problems.
People's opinion might differ from mine and love it but well, we can't all feel the same.
‘Remedial course’ arc Vs Uraraka's quirk counseling program in chap 431
So, in my Quirk counseling post I’ve already mentioned how Uraraka's quirk counseling program seemed to recycle the idea of the ‘Remedial course’ arc… which is not so great because the whole thing didn’t mention as involved in the program the people who had been involved in the ‘Remedial course’ arc, especially Shouto who was directly touched by Quirk problems in the family and troublesome Quirk related family situations (so he should/could also be invested in helping kids who have such problems) and the story didn’t even create a scene in which information about what happened in the ‘Remedial course’ arc could be passed to Uraraka as we never see Bakugou and Shouto talk about their lessons. The result is it either happened offscreen (possible but bad because it doesn’t acknowledge their contribute) or Uraraka somehow had the same idea that the guys in the ‘Remedial course’ arc had (possible but not great because it feels unoriginal).
But, okay, let’s put this aside for now.
What I really wanted to do now was a more in deep comparison between the two so let’s start with sum up some things about them, starting with…
THE STORY
‘Remedial course’ arc (RAC for short)
In order to get their Hero license a group of teenagers (Bakugou, Shouto, Inasa and Utsushimi) is taking part to a remedial course. During one of the lessons they’re asked out of the blue to take care of a class of kids from the Masegaki elementary school. The class is apparently composed SOLELY of troublesome kids which their teacher doesn’t know how to handle. The teenagers are expected to ‘transform the class’ by the end of the day, working together to win the class over. After various failed attempts they manage to use their Quirks and the kids Quirks to create a wonderful slide and have all the kids play with it. This impresses and tames the kids who become absolutely obedient and feel understood by them.
Uraraka's quirk counseling program in chap 431 (UQC for short)
A group of Heroes (Togata, Amajiki and Hadō) has volunteered to take part to Uraraka’s Quirk counseling program and, after reading the documents about the kids, they’re about to join them with Uraraka. Uraraka explains them that the most important thing is communication, that kids might seem to be fine but actually have troubles often related to their home environment and are wary of opening up but as they’ll have a time or longer to work with them, they’ll surely notice signs and that they just have to focus on making friends. The result is one of them (Togata) decides to challenge the kids to a game in which they should use their Quirk to hit his ‘peaches’. Uraraka helps with her Quirk a shy kid to do so. All the kids are impressed by his feat and things seem to go on smoothly.
Now that we’ve refreshed everyone’s mind let’s start comparing…
THE STRUCTURE OF THE TWO PROJECTS MORE IN DEEP
Who is aimed at: a class who apparently has only troublesome kids all of whom in need to be helped (RAC), a class of kids which might or might not have kids with Quirk related problems (UQC)
Who is supposed to help: 4 teenagers who’re studying to become Heroes (RAC), 3 adults who are Heroes [actually 5 adults if we count Uraraka and Asui but it’s unclear if they’ll stay to work with the other 3 or are just accompanying them and then will move to another school] (UQC)
How much preparation they have: none (RAC), they were given to read some documents about the kids and, as they walk there, they’re also given an EXTREMELY quick and vague explanation about how the program works [Uraraka and Asui might have more preparation but we don’t really know if they’ll stay] (UQC)
How much practical experience they have: none (RAC), none [again, Uraraka and Asui have experience but we don’t know if they’ll remain to help or move to another school] (UQC)
How much willing they were to help the kids: they had no idea they would have to help the kids and were given it as an assignment to get their Hero license (the fact in this particular case the teenagers involved also decided they wanted to help the kids for the sake of the kids wasn’t factored when their involvement was decided) (RAC), they volunteered (UQC)
How much time they have: a school day (RAC), a month which can be extended if there’s need for it (UQC)
Now… from this quick overview it’s clear while the UQC’s structure isn’t great… well, the structure of the RAC is a mess. Teenagers, in order to get their Hero license, are forced to deal with a class FULL of kid a professional teacher doesn’t know how to handle and are expected to solve their problems IN A DAY without having THE SLIGHTEST PREPARATION to do so. Having willing adults with a minimal preparation deal for a month with a class in which some kids might have problems is definitely a much better plan… at least on papers.
Well… technically even the story wants to claim the UQC is better, as the RAC shows the teenagers making various attempts (and failing more than once) before managing to connect with the kids, while the UQC shows Togata making a single attempt that works like a charm right from the start.
The problem is… Togata’s attempt is quite bad and shouldn’t have worked while the teenagers’ final attempt was good and could have worked, not to magically fix all the kids’ problems but to create a connection and help them.
Now, I’ll give the UQC a pass in the sense I won’t blame it specifically for how Togata’s attempt at making friends is, it’s clear that what Togata does suits his own personal brand of humor and idea on how to make friends (remember when he creeped Midoriya out by showing only his face all of sudden? And how he used the peach joke against Tomura?) and he wasn’t instructed by Uraraka or the Quirk counseling rules to do what he did.
At the same time, this is the UQC MAIN problem, it doesn’t instruct the people involved in how to approach with the kids, same as the RAC, but the RAC is a surprise test that’s more focused on seeing if the teenagers can do it than on helping the kids (I mean, the teenagers could fail, there was no guaranty they would succeed) while the UQC is focused on HELPING THE KIDS. The adults shouldn’t fail, they should be given all the means to succeed, they shouldn’t improvise, they should go there with a plan that should have chances to be effective.
Now… why Togata’s attempt shouldn’t have worked? (or, at least, he had serious chances to fail?)
Number 1 reason:
Togata challenges the kids and even mocks their failed attempts adopting a Villain persona. To him it’s a joke. Practically he would have increased the kids’ frustration or scared them or make them more aggressive or disappointed them because the Number 1 Hero is being so mean. He’s not yet friends with the kids so they wouldn’t know his way to act and how he’s only playing around and they’re young. They aren’t meant to be able to decode his behavior and figure out it’s a joke.
By the way we see Bakugou challenging the kids in the RAC and, guess what, it doesn’t work! Bakugou acting all aggressive doesn’t get him close to the kids, it increases the distance between them! In the end Bakugou will get close by acting mature and giving honest counsel from his own experience, not by acting like a scary and overly competitive guy, so who saw the RAC appreciates even less Togata’s act.
Number 2 reason:
The game Togata proposes is a competitive one, one means to have winners and losers. In short it’ll split the kids in two groups, where the winner group will likely be smaller than the loser group. His game doesn’t promote cooperation or equality. Think if among the kids there had been little Midoriya and little Bakugou. Midoriya would be out of the game where Bakugou would have more likely won. This would have boosted further Bakugou’s ego and made Midoriya feel even less… but no, Uraraka would step in and help Midoriya to win… which would have caused Bakugou to react angrily to the frustration or losing and complain that Midoriya won only because he was helped out… and likely the other kids would feel the same. Now you might argue this would help Togata to see the kids with problems but… this would also give the kids with problems ADDITIONAL problems. And what if no one had won and all the kids were to feel frustrated because they couldn’t win? Or what if that frustration had pushed them to go overboard with the use of their Quirk? Yes, there are Pro Heroes there so if something wrong happens they could theoretically handle it, but it’s only theoretically. A distraction can cause them to act too late. Now, okay, I can give Togata a pass on how his game apparently ignores how some kids could not have a Quirk that’s suitable for this (or be Quirkless), because he had read documents about the kids so he might know all the kids have Quirks that can help them. I can’t give him a pass for how he overlooked the fact that a competition can still make matters worse and doesn’t necessarily promotes troubled kids to open up or make friends with Togata exactly because it can make matters worse.
Compare with the RAC. The teenagers in the end realized they shouldn’t compete with the kids because this makes matter worse, as they aren’t other teenagers who can get friends by competing with them, they’re kids. So they set up a game in which each kid can take part as equal and have fun, a game with no winners and losers, a game that put value in the kids’ Quirks without putting a rank to the kids or their Quirks. All the kids get to have fun and all the kids get to be helped by the teenagers to have fun, all the kids are praised and feel appreciated and understood. This creates a good atmosphere between the kids and the teens. Realistically no, it wouldn’t magically solve the kids’ problems but it could help them to open up, to trust the teens.
Number 3 reason:
Togata’s game doesn’t really encourages Quirk positivity. Yes, the kids are allowed to use their Quirks but none of their Quirk would have allowed them to win (Ooshima did win only because he was helped by Uraraka) so all their kids would have turned out to be useless and not being praised. While yes, the goal here is clearly just to make friends, since this little segment was meant to show us how UQC works, it could have also shows us a game which implemented Quirk positivity but that’s not the case, where the RAC did show Quirk positivity (the material produced by the kids is praised and used to create the slides and Quirks which didn’t produce anything are praised for how helpful they could be in cleaning operations).
Number 4 reason:
After we’ve one winner, Ooshima, the timid, shy kid, is suddenly tossed in the spotlight and involved in Togata’s style of humor. For start this cements the idea we’ve one single winner and the rest are losers, instead than giving to the other kids the chance to win as well and became ‘all equal’ to him… but, what’s more, this is a risky move to use in real life if you don’t know well the kids as the other kids might react badly and, if something were to go wrong, this can also cause harm to Ooshima’s self esteem.
There’s no such risk in the RAC where as there are no winners and losers all the kids are equal and none of them is put under the spotlight.
Conclusion:
All of the above prove no one told Togata which are the best tactics to use to interact with those kids and make friends without risking to make things worse.
Being well meaning isn’t enough.
This should be a program that aims at helping kids so it should prepare people to do so, not just tell them ‘with time you’ll surely notice signs of problems so don’t focus on the papers but on making friends’. Signs of problems can escape PROFESSIONALS. Mistakes can be done by PROFESSIONALS. Yet here we’re expecting well meaning amateurs to fix things just by having them trying their best… when ‘trying their best’ wasn’t enough to save Tomura, Touya or Himiko.
Credits when it’s due, in Japan there’s the belief that with just effort you can surpass people with innate talent, that if you fail is because you hadn’t tried hard enough and that if you try hard you should succeed and there’s also a strong stigma against psychological help… so this should have influenced Horikoshi in creating the UQC, denying people preparation because a psychological approach is ‘bad’ and focusing on effort because it’s the key to do everything.
Plus, although this bit is meant to explain Quirk counseling, it seems Horikoshi planned it merely as a short moment more aimed at lightening the mood of the story than at really showing a good way to help the kids. Things go way too easy at the first try, with no one showing big signs of needing help. Ooshima might as well be just shy and this might not be due to Quirk related problems. Or he has problems but it’s hard to tell in such a short scene because there’s no real focus on the kids and their problems and how hard it could be to help them because the author here wants positivity and smiles and pass the belief that of course the children will be helped and everything will be all right.
In the end this bit is just an infodump, with light moments and focus on how Uraraka is doing such an important job that’s so time consuming but she claims it’s all ‘me time’ because she likes it.
So yeah, what we see is definitely inferior to the RAC which showed a concrete way in which teens and kids could connect and be of some help to kids.
I’ll conclude with something I’ve already said but that I still find worth repeating: it’s annoying the teens involved in the RAC were never said to have inspired or have been involved in the UQC. The teens’ experiences in the RAC ultimately weren’t used at all, when HERE they could have been put to good use. At the same time while it’s possible Uraraka figured the old Quirk counseling program harmed Himiko instead than helping her, Horikoshi gave the whole thing a too weak connection. I mean, the first time it was mentioned Midnight thought Tomura was like that because he didn’t receive Quirk counseling (meaning among Heroes there’s the belief Quirk counseling is good) and now Uraraka thinks Himiko is like that because the Quirk counseling she received wasn’t good enough and needed to be improved? Without Himiko ever mentioning it? It feels random, as if Horikoshi changed his plans all of sudden.
But okay, I guess with this I’ve finished talking about the topic.
All in all it’s a pity things went like that but this is what we have. Thank you for reading so far and sorry if it felt boring to you.
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This will probably never happen but I think it would be nice to see Guts and Casca's story culminating in them becoming the king and queen of Midland. Mainly because I think Guts' arc has always been about finding purpose and community in the world around him. And to see him prove himself worthy of an entire kingdom's trust and to find purpose in protecting these people in turn feels like the perfect end to his arc.
For Casca, becoming queen alongside Guts would not only be a nice new beginning for their relationship, it would be a great payoff for her character as well. Her arc has always been about her relationship with womanhood and how that effects her ability to gain agency for herself in a hostile world, her ability to protect herself and her relationship with power. If Casca became the Queen of Midland alongside Guts it would not only give her the permanent leadership position she deserves, it would also show that Guts and their people love and trust her enough to reign them all in when needed.
As for the Moonlight Boy, I like to believe that he would be saved from Griffith's grasp by his parents. And only then would he be able to gain the throne Griffith destroyed his family's lives for. Even if it there is a risk that the Moonlight Boy's relationship with the throne would be tinged with the trauma of being a mostly powerless vessel of Griffith, I think there's hope that he could find purpose as the next king.
It would also be a thematically fitting case of irony that Guts, Casca and the Moonlight Boy, three of Griffith's biggest living victims, would be the ones to reclaim their agency and their senses of purpose by stealing everything Griffith dreamed for. And with how Guts has come to learn the importance of community, how companionship and love tether him to his humanity, he would be a better king than Griffith could ever be.
#Guts#Casca#The Moonlight Boy#Griffith#Berserk#I know this ending wouldn't solve Guts or Casca's problems with the brand of sacrifice but it's not supposed to#those two will always be strugglers#and even if Guts and Casca are ultimately condemned to hell because of the brand they would have solace knowing that they lived life well#if they don't die then it just means that Guts and Casca would truly be following in Skull Knight and Danann's footsteps#just think of who Skull Knight used to be#plus Guts and Casca swooping in to steal Griffith's dream and find fulfillment in it when he didn't would be funny as fuck#I don't know what would happen to Charlotte in this ending but I like to think she just abdicated and ran off into the countryside#let her live her cottage core dreams#ash speaks
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In Thick as Thieves, Costis draws a parallel between Kamet + himself and Immakuk + Ennikar, but I’ve always wondered how Kamet would have related to the poems when he was young and had dreams of running the Mede empire from behind the scenes.
Kamet's scholarly description of the Immukuk and Ennikar tablets invites an obvious comparison to the real-world epic of Gilgamesh:
“You said you were reciting from the first tablet,” said the Attolian. “There are more than a hundred in the temple of Anet alone,” I said. “No one knows how many there are altogether. Scholars argue about it. Some of the tablets are retellings of other tablets, only differing in style. Sometimes parts of the story change.”
Thick as Thieves, Chapter 2
This could easily be a description of our reception of the Gilgamesh story, too, with significant differences between various ancient traditions, and the role of Enkidu (loosely, a model for Ennikar in QT) changing drastically between the Sumerian vs. Akkadian versions of the myth:
In the Sumerian tales … Enkidu is Gilgamesh’s servant, not his friend. […] Indeed, it seems that converting Enkidu into Gilgamesh’s friend was the seminal change by which the Akkadian author lent unity to the materials which he used in the epic. […] To enable Enkidu’s death to turn Gilgamesh from the pursuit of lasting fame to a literal quest for immortality, the Akkadian author seized upon the sporadic hints of friendship in the Sumerian tales and applied them across the board, consistently terming Enkidu Gilgamesh’s friend, brother, and equal, whom he loves and is to caress.
Jeffrey H. Tigay, The Evolution of the Gilgamesh Epic
In QT, following MWT's tendency to make her myths a little more hopeful and YA-friendly, Immakuk and Ennikar escape the land of the dead, although we don't know how because that part of the tablet is broken. (Another neat callout to the Gilgamesh epic, which survives mostly intact but with significant portions missing!) But in the real version, Gilgamesh's love for Enkidu becomes a springboard for the poem to explore the inevitability of death: in fact, depending on what you understand the 12th tablet to be doing, Gilgamesh loses Enkidu not once but twice.
The parallel/earlier tradition of Enkidu as Gilgamesh's servant begs the question whether there are similar traditions about Ennikar in any of those alternate tablets Kamet mentions. If there are, it would point to another obvious parallel that a younger Kamet might have made—between Ennikar and himself as Nahuseresh's (or Naheelid's) right hand man, guarding him faithfully between adventures and somewhat subject to his dangerous whims. Compare these two passages:
Gilgamesh went up to the top of the mountain, and offered sacred flour to its peak: “Bring me a dream, mountain! Show me a good omen.” Enkidu built him a house for the Dream God, with a windbreak against the storm. He had Gilgamesh lie in a circle of sacred flour, while Enkidu slept like a snare in the doorway.
Gilgamesh, trans. Sophus Helle
Nahuseresh was a light sleeper, a matter of necessity for him, and when he’d opened his eyes in the darkness of his room and seen a moving flicker of white, he had been instantly alert, slipping his hand under his pillow for the long knife he kept there before he’d rolled quickly to one side. He’d found a woman standing calmly by his bed looking down at him. […] He had wanted to ask where she’d come from and what had become of Kamet, who should have been sleeping in the anteroom….
Queen of Attolia, Chapter 17
And of course the comparison to the original myth (all about death!) wouldn't be complete without Gen's apology:
"I'm sorry," said the king. "I know you wanted your chance at the emperor's side, even if it meant your death would come with his." "We all die," I snapped.
Thick as Thieves, Chapter 13
None of this is to negate the primary (and frequent) parallels between Kamet and Costis's journey/friendship and Immakuk and Ennikar's adventures in the QT poems! I just think the secondary, potentially darker parallels are interesting too.
#queen's thief#tqt#thick as thieves#kamet#this analysis is somewhat vibes-based of course#but so are qt myth adaptations as a whole so i'm letting myself have this :)#also now that i've typed all this out i actually think it's fascinating - and a very successful change#that mwt turns the gilgamesh immortality quest on its head#like not only does immakuk save ennikar but they ultimately never die at all?? meanwhile the gilgamesh epic is like 'these guys are SO dead#'so dead in fact that if 11 tablets weren't enough here's a 12th bonus ghost story about the exact same topic: more death. we all die'#unrelatedly i wonder if sin-leqi-unninni exists at all in the QT universe. i think kamet would think he was neat
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i am so easily flustered by stories about exhibitionism (。ノω\。) i haven't read too many yet but my favorite one so far was Skinny Dip by @/funkybunnsfw. it so so sweet, so fun, so exciting =ω=
#i too would like to turn my friends on so much by watching me touch another friend that they start having sex with each other about it#it is my fantasy as one of the ultimate bonding experiences. the earnestness‚ the vulnerability‚ how wonderful ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ#and to do it at night in a secluded area where no one Should see you..? unless? 😳🙈#god#i just want an audience... i want my friends to be part of it 🥰 they should join us actually 💕#a bolder kind of exhibitionism sounds so fun. it makes my heart race to see and think about (。ノω\。)#how embarrassing. I'm not brave enough‚ but what if someone made me lean into my embarrassment anyways#i would die#i love being embarrassed ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ i want to be embarrassed so bad#my number one that would absolutely kill me would be someone walking me through one of my audios and playing it out loud for me#say sweet things about me while I'm being reduced to a puddle. i don't even listen to them i just press send and wait for my review lmao 😭#i need to find someone who loves watching me squirm physically and mentally. i want to be overwhelmed#🌝 sometimes with embarrassment
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Gimme a new Hellsing anime that combines the og anime and the ova/manga, and the animation is done by the ones who've done the Castlevania series. The scene of Seras going blood crazy for the first time? Alucard vs Anderson or Incognito? Seras vs The Captain? The attack on Hellsing manor and Seras becoming a true vampire? The attack on London? Everything? Please. Please, I need to see this happen.
#hellsing#hellsing ultimate#hellsing anime#It deserves to be remade/have a remake#combined the best of both series together#The Incognito arc happening first#and then the Millennium arc#wait no better - Millennium arc first then incognito#also I think all us sertegra shippers would very much like to see a certain finger scene happen 👀#Have the nazi's attack London first but Anderson doesn't die nor does Walter betray Hellsing#Alucard still disappears for thirty years#and doesn't come back until well into the Incognito Arc but we occasionally get scenes on him before#he's weaker because all his souls are gone but he's getting better stronger and returns to strength near the end#look I've had Thoughts about this and imagining it in the castlevania animation has been living in my head rent free
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Something else that makes me sympathetic to Pharma's situation is like. Idk if there's an actual term for this or if someone smarter and more academic wrote it about some real life context that actually matters.
But, so we've already established among Pharma stans that the circumstances at Delphi were blackmail/torture with no real way out that wouldn't involve Pharma being responsible for people getting killed (either killing patients for the deal or having everyone die bc he failed his end of the deal).
And I feel like while "he's still in the wrong because he killed people" is part of it, another sort of implicit part is the idea that Pharma should've been willing to take more personal risk, maybe even risk dying? I mean, Ratchet does ask "why didn't you just detonate it near the DJD" (to which Pharma responds that he did try to get Sonic and Boom to do it, but they refused) so like
Idk I feel like we do have this social notion of martyrs as a very romantic ideal, people you can praise for being so brave and strong and righteous that they ended their own lives for their cause, while you can also coo about how sad and tragic it is that dying is what it took for them to do the right thing. But at the same time I feel like in reality, having an expectation that people become martyrs is kind of a toxic social norm bc like. It's very easy to demand that others sacrifice their lives for some Ultimate Moral Good when you yourself aren't experiencing the same hardships as they are. And ultimately it is kind of fucked up to tell someone "the moral thing you should've done was risk your life/kill yourself" because asking someone to pay their life to do the right thing is no small request. And sure, the typical response would be to call them a "coward" for caring more about saving their own skin instead of doing the right thing... but again, death is a really scary thing and self-preservation is a really strong instinct, so it kind of feels like having this binary view of "you're either a Brave Hero who sacrifices your life for everyone else or a Dirty Coward who's too scared of dying to do what's right" is kind of fucked up?
I guess the best way to describe it is that if someone willingly gives up their life as a sacrifice to others, it can be a noble thing because it's a choice they made willingly, but if it becomes a Moral Standard that in order to be a Good Person you have to be unafraid of throwing your life away and if you aren't willing to die you're a Cowardly Bad Person, that's when it becomes toxic.
Idk, I guess how this ties back to Pharma is that he was never in a position where he expected to make these kinds of moral decisions/ultimatums. He's a doctor who doesn't even get into combat, his job is to heal and not to kill, he's behind the front lines in a hospital that's supposed to be a safe, neutral place for him to heal people. So in the face of suddenly having a "murder people on behalf of me, or I murder everyone you swore to protect" ultimatum thrust upon him, I understand why Pharma wasn't """"""""""brave enough"""""""""" to "do the right thing" (whatever that would've been in the case of Delphi). You could argue that maybe a frontliner soldier accepted the burden of possibly dying for their cause and they've become used to it as someone who lives that reality every single day, but I feel like for Pharma, who's a doctor and a protected non-combatant (from what we can tell), that sort of risking of his life/living with the fact his life could be snuffed out any day isn't something he would've been prepared for at all.
And for me personally, from an outsider's perspective, it strikes me as kind of unethical to go "oh well he should've just detonated the bomb himself even if it killed him" bc again, there's a difference between witnessing a moral conundrum as a bystander versus being the person living with it and being under time pressure where it's do-or-die. Just as part of my personal standards, I feel like death is such a huge consequence/burden of someone's actions (literally you are no longer alive, any potential you had left is cut short, you cease to exist on this plane) that it feels rather callous to go "Well you should've just been willing to die for your beliefs if you really cared that much!!!"
#squiggposting#pharma apologism#this is only like tangentially related to pharma honestly#not to compare blorbos to real life but like. it reminds me of this phenomenon where privileged ppl in privileged countries#will tell ppl living in zones of war and strife 'oh well if you don't like your gov so bad just revolt against them'#like oh yes tell me how easy it is to stand up against the threats of torture and death#surely the only reason people would want to avoid that is bc they're cowards or don't want to stand up for their beliefs#contrary to what nationalism would have ppl believe. 'wanting to not die' isn't a moral position#everyone wants to live. no one wants to die. it doesnt make you a bad person to be scared of dying#esp (going back to blorbo's) in a situation like pharma's where every option he had ended in death#the death of his patients or the death of everyone at delphi or his death personally#on top of the fact he's a noncombatant who hasn't been desensitized to violence/risking his own life#and is dealing with a trained group of killers that he can't possibly match on physical terms#so yeah actually i don't blame pharma for what he did#he made shitty decisions in a shitty situation but was ultimately a victim#also if you want to view the blackmail deal from a framework of abuse#it is also fucked up to basically tell someone they werent brave enough to just kill their accuser or ask for help#isnt the entire point of such situations that the victim is both powerless to stop the abuse#and too afraid of asking for help/thinks they cant ask for help. and thats why they dont just get out#idk sometimes the best moral judgement is to forgive someone or view it as 'complicated'#sometimes regardless of the good or evilness of their actions the best choice is to not make a judgement#or to err in favor of a forgiving/'i cant speak for your experience' judgement#anyways the fact is that the rosy fantasy of being a brave noble soldier who sacrifices for the cause#rarely stands up to reality where youre just terrified and powerless and dont know what to do#and suddenly the rosy glow of The Noble Cause isnt comforting in the prospect of horrible torturous death
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