#I think it’ll help pace it better :3

[desertduality]

Made this for myself so I could make sure things matched up when writing the next chapters but I thought I’d put it here in case anyone was interested :]

[serejae]

IF BY CHANCE ? | BND

-

p2

WHAT ? - BND AS EXES WHO WANT YOU BACK (bnd realizing they messed up after you end things)

WHEN ? - (warning) this is not a REAL display of the members im just doing this for weeping entertainment:) attempt to unconsented kissing in jaehyuns, drinking in sungho’s, mentions of throw up/throwing up in leehans, major angst 😒

WHO ? - (a/n) i love angst but not like death but yearning and groveling, pls tell me yall relate. lowk went hard on jaehyun and leehans from personal experience 🤔🤔

uncapitalization intended and not proofread

theres a theory that you will always meet the same person twice

-

P.SUNGHO ; he was too focused on his career.

! - you knew and understood thst sungho’s job was very important to him but it started to feel like you werent his partner anymore. you started to feel like decoration in your guys apartment that he would just ignore when he got home.

! - to try and help your relationship you made him dinner, cleaned up the place, asked him about his day to which he blew up. his cold demeanor suddenly dropped as he yelled at you about constantly bothering him when he just wanted to sleep. you knew your intentions and knew you didnt want to bother but help sungho. you then realize you werent valued in this relationship and were pulling the whole weight by yourself, so you ended things.

! - it took him about 4 days to realize that he messed up. those 4 days his mind was constantly fogged up about work, after those 4 days he walked into the house and how he realized was when he alerted you (or tried to) that he was home with a “honey im home”, only to be met with silence. a bit confused not realizing his brain hadnt catched up yet, he walked into your twos room, or use to be. only to be met with the mess he left for himself in the morning. there is when he realized you weren’t there anymore. to shake his mind off of it, he decided to eat before doing anything ,he went to the kitchen to heat up some frozen dinner. as the meal heated he realized the house was so empty, cold, and quiet. the only sound was coming from the spinning microwave.

! - it’s safe to say the soulless house took a toll on him. everyday he dreaded going home, which is funny cause he couldve said the same thing before he realized how important you were. his friends who were tired of seeing him so lifeless decided to invite him to go to the bar to hang out…he wasnt much fun there either. that was until he caught a glimpse of you from the reflection of his empty shot glass. his eyes light up and he turns around to make eye contact with you. .

-

L.RIWOO ; trust issues.

! - you understood where riwoo was coming from, you knew that trust issues are normal , but it got to a point where his trust issues started to make you question him.

! - and it didnt help that each time you did try to reassure him that it somehow made it worse. “ri, of course im going to stay late, my boss asked me too. you have my location, i send you photos of me working, what else do you want?” maybe your approach wasnt the best but the way he snapped was when you knew no matter how much you tried to protect both you and his peace, he will try to tear it down again. “oh, so now your getting defensive. i shouldve known, especially from you.” he said it with no remorse or thought behind it. and to him he thought he was winning this argument but in reality he was going to make the biggest loss of his life.

! - it took him 5 hours to realize he messed up. when you left and packed your things he thought you’d run back and it’ll make him feel better about himself. but after 4 hours it was already 3 am and he realized maybe…you wouldnt come back as soon as he thought. but that last hour before he realized he messed up, he had a dream of you and him. you two were living that exact moment, before you left. you standing pacing back and forth as he sat on the couch. except this time, he talks to you about why he thinks the way he thinks and vows to do better. in that dream he sleeps with you in his arms. when he woke up he stared at the ceiling, and it was like it was talking to him. thats when he realized you werent coming back. you wont be in his arms again, you wont tell him about your day, and you wont constantly tired of arguing with him because of his doubts.

! - after trapping himself in his house and thoughts he decided to go on a walk, but to his suprise once he opens the door you stand there staring at him with a box of his things in your hands. his mouth goes dry

-

M. JAEHYUN ; girl bestfriend

! - you were the never the type of partner to care too much about the opposite gender best friends as you were very secure in your relationship, but in this case it wasnt him but rather her. you knew from the moment she laid her eyes on you she was no good. but you decided to give her the benefit of the doubt as this was jaehyuns childhood bestfriend, and if you didnt like her you could at least pretend for your boyfriends sake.

! - you were always calm and reserved around jaehyun and his bestfriend even on those dsys you wanted to push her off him. but today it was like a flip switched. you walked home soaked from the rain after not being to reach your boyfriend to pick you up. you get it he’s busy, but your blood boiled when you saw both of them sitting on the couch peacefully. she looked up at you and grinned as jaehyun ran up to you worried. “jaehyun lets talk in our room please” you simply asked. he followed you to you and his shared room with a towel drying you off as you spoke. “i really hate to do this to you but its either me or her.” he paused his movements of drying your hair “you know i cant do that. ive known her for so long do you not trust me?” he said defensive. “i dont trust her” you said blandly, he stared at you and started lecturing you on how his bestfriend gave you no reason to not trust her. you didnt argue back, you were too tired for it you just said “she likes you jaehyun”. he paused and continued lecturing you about how thats ridiculous. you shake your head and pack your things “clearly i know your answer.” he continues on and on on how youre being ridiculous. once you leave the door he puts his hand in his face.

! - it took him like 5 minutes to realize he messed up (bye.) his friend came into your room and sat down by him as he listened to him rant. “you know…” she said slowly “y/n’s not wrong” his ears perked up at that “ive always liked you jaehyun, your just too silly to realize.” he freezes at her words, feeling his blood run cold he feels her fingers on his chin and her leaning in. he backs up and kicks her out despite her protest. once he locked the door and is left in the empty haunting house alone he scrambles for his phone. after finding it he opens it to all your messages asking if he can pick you up. it made him nauseous at the thought he left you alone and cold for his ‘friend’ that was the cause of your breakup. he calls you to which you dont answer, he starts panicking at this point and paces in the house as he mass text and call you just wanting a answer. he pauses in front of him at the only room he hasnt stepped room in since pacing. your bedroom. he walks in and lays down only to be reminded of your scent when he lifts the blankets over his head. thats when he starts crying and realized you weren’t there to hold him like you normally did

! - he didnt have his safe space anymore.

-

H. TAESAN ; distant

! - you hated to admit it but one of the things that drew you into taesan was the thing that made you end things. his cold demeanor was what made everyone so curious about him, fortunately or unfortunately you were the one he picked to be into his very small circle to which you became his partner. during this you learned he loved his alone time which you were fine with, what threw you off was the way he signaled to you he wanted to be alone. he would ignore you in public and not reply to your messages as if you didnt know each other. you were okay with it at first since you loved your strange boyfriend but after a while you grew tired of it. tired of breaking down his walls and when you finally feel accepted by him only to be shut out again

! - and clearly it was a mistake bringing it up to him because it lead him to being the loudest you ever heard him, arguing back and forth. “i dont get why you just have to pretend you don’t know me. im fine with you needing your alone space but why do you have to act like you hate me?”

“im starting to if thats how your gonna react to me needing my time every so often.”

you couldnt argue anymore, especially when he just admitted he was close to hating you for communicating your feelings. the room went quiet, taesan looks over his shoulder to see you staring at the ground before walking off. after that day you didnt text first or initiate anything to see if he would, unfortunately to you. he didnt.

! - it took him about a month to realize he messed up (sorry taesan lovers:c). but dont get me wrong, its not like he went on with his life like normal. everyday it felt like he was missing something but he could never put his finger on this feeling so he just dismissed it. until one day by instinct he sat at your twos spot alone and your guys song started to play in his headphones. he was never one to communicate his feelings too well but that didnt mean he didnt care for you. he would dedicate songs to you and one just fit perfectly with you two. when the song played he looked around and realized where he was with what song was playing only to see something is missing

you.

and thats when it hit him, he didnt get his usual messages, his hugs, or his sneaky looks from you. he was alone, but wasnt this what he wanted?

he wanted to be alone right?

he loved it.

right?

he then realized

he loves you more then he loved being alone.

was it worth it to lose one thing you love more to prioritize the other?

-

K.LEEHAN ; too friendly

! - from the beginning you knew dating leehan came with a price. everyone wanted him. some more bold than others that would go up to him and ask him out even when he had a partner. his reaction to these admirers was a stranger then how a boyfriend would react to girls hitting on him. he’d entertain the girls in front for you just to see your reaction. you knew he loved seeing you jealous which was cute at first but after a while it got old. it started to make you doubt whether he really loved you or not. if the girls would compliment leehan he’d start asking for details, “oh yeah? how much do you like me?” “my arms are pretty strong arent they?” or he’d start teasing “calm down my partners infront of me, maybe later” to which the girls, including him would laugh as he looked over to see your fuming face.

! - but this one time, you couldnt take it anymore. if this is what dating someone admired upon was like, you wanted no part. it was like normal. girls would swarm around you and leehan and start flirting, but his one comment ticked you off. “yeah of course we can hangout, im sure my partner wont mind” he winked, he looks over at you expecting to see your puffy angry face but is met with you leaving the table. he follows behind you calling for you. when he finally catches up to you thats when you spew everything youve been feeling. “i can understand if your admired i get it your handsome! but your taken and you should know that, no normal boyfriend flirts back with girls who flirt with him. i have to deal with this closing feeling in my throat and chest all because you want a little enjoyment for your day and im done.” he looked at you confused with a hint of being offended. “youre overreacting yn.” he said before being cut off with you walking away.

! - he realized he messed up 6 days later. its not like he didnt care, but he was in his state of mind that youll run back like any of his fangirls would. during those days he continued to flirt back with them now that his flock was much bigger now that he was single. but this time he flirted back much less enthusiastic as he would before, because he had no reason to, no reaction, no partner to coddle after. he now felt sick with the thought of flirting with anyone to start dating if it wasnt you. he got up from the table to which he recieved a bunch of whines and pleads to stay. he just needed fresh air. he continued walking around campus until he heard a familiar laugh. he turned his head over and seen you with another person, laughing and getting all close like you and him use too. now staring from afar he understood what you meant. he felt his chest and throat closing at the thought sight of you reliving what you and him would do with someone that wasnt him. and his words replay in his mind

“you’re overreacting yn”

“your overreacting”

“overreacting”

in fact you were not overreacting but he knew he had no right to be jealous, when his urge for you to be jealous tore you two apart.

he was on the verge of spilling his guts and you looked happy. not angry, and thats what you deserved

-

K. WOONHAK ; always mad at you

! - woonhak has always been very open about his anger issues and you knew that. he was just a teen living his first life and you acknowledged that. on certain days he would hold grudges against you and not tell you why he was angry, leaving you alone to figure out and trace back to see what you had done. and it was always something small like giving him only 2 hugs instead of 3 for morning, afternoon, and night. and forbid you try to get him to communicate why he is mad at you. he’ll turn into a big angry ball yelling at every reason he should be mad

! - this one day you were so tired from school. you just wanted to walk home with your boyfriend and hopefully cuddle at home. but he wasnt waiting for you outside your class, instead you already saw him walking out of the school. catching up to him you say hi and start asking him about his day to which you recieve a mean face ignoring you. deciding to avoid that you talked about your day to which he paid no attention to. thats when you snapped “hey im talking to you!” no reply “why do you always do this, you just get mad at me and expect me to read your mind!” he turned over to you and yelled back “i dont know why you can never just think, is it that hard to realize what you did?” “no i cant read your mind woonhak!”. he just turned away and started to walk “woonhak if you keep walking were over!” he paused, to which you hoped he’d come to his senses but he kept walking

! - he realized he messed up 1 days after. day 1, he completely forgot about the night before as it was so normal for him to go back to not being mad at you when he felt like it. when you didnt walk to school with him he decided that was his reasoning for being mad you today. and when you didnt run up to him or walk up to him after school to walk together he started to be a bit confused. here is when youd start to cave but as he walked home he retraced his memory with each step and remembered what you had said when he was being petty.

‘ “woonhak if you keep walking were over!” ‘

he just kept walking, and now you werent his to walk anymore.

-

“is it so wrong of me to hope she breaks your heart, is it so wrong for me to pray she tears you apart?”

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

End Game 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn’t go exactly as planned.

Characters: Andy Barber

Note: and so it continues.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

When you find Kara, she’s at the front of the line. You wait impatiently on the other side of the rope as she gabs up a storm with the D-lister on the other side of the table. Restless, throat sour with bile, you pace in a small line, flicking your thumb as you resist the urge to tell her to hurry up. 

You need to get out of there. You can barely think. You can’t even stay still as heat scalds and speckles over your scalp and down your body. 

You turn on your heel and your feet tangle as you stop short. Andy stands just on the other side of the line, staring at you. Oh shit. 

You rush over to Kara and snap her tank top strap, “hey, there’s other people waiting.” 

“One second!” She squeals carelessly over her shoulder, quickly returning to fawning over the washed-up sci-fi actor. 

You sigh and cross your arms, rocking back and forth, “Kara, I really don’t feel good.” 

She huffs and chirps crisply, excusing herself from the table. Several others send her a dirty look for spending so much time chattering as they wait eagerly in the wings. She steps around the post to the other side of the rope. 

“Let me guess, too much sugar?” She scoffs. 

“Something like that,” you grumble. “Look, it’s like five. We’ve been here for a couple hours. I’m chill getting out of here.” 

“Already?” She lifts a brow, “we haven’t even got you a plushie.” 

“I should save my money,” you keep your arms folded around you. 

She eyes you up and down, “are you okay?” 

“Y-yeah, it’s like you said, too much sugar. I should’ve eaten breakfast. Or lunch.” 

She gives you a skeptical squint and shrugs, “alright, whatever. We can go hang at mine.” 

“Great, sorry,” you mope, “I just... I’m tired.” 

“It’s fine,” she assures you, “I get it. This place can be a bit much and the BO is starting to get to me.” She struts ahead of you and you catch up to her. She marvels at the signed photo in her hand, “at least I got something cool.” 

“Yeah, that’s awesome. You gonna hang it up?” You ask, trying to distract yourself. 

“Mm, maybe.” 

You glance over your shoulder. Andy’s closer, looming, hands in his pocket, eyes set on you. What is he doing? You grab her arm and hurry her towards the exit. 

“Woah, what’s up?” She trips in her wedged sandals. 

“I just need some fresh air. Like you said, it stinks in here.” 

As you finally get through the front doors, your phone is shaking incessantly. The buzz can be heard through the denim. You ignore it as you cross the lot. 

“Is that him calling?” She asks, “is that what this is about? I mean, I’d be pissed too but he shouldn’t get to ruin your day.” 

“No, it’s not,” you lie, “I just... crowds get to me after a while. It’s been a long day, traveling and all that... I’m tired.” 

“Mm, sure, well, let’s not let that coward shit on it all,” she snips. “It’ll be like high school. Girls’ night! Popcorn and nail painting and your favourite hollywood hunk.” 

“You mean your favourite,” you toss back. 

She giggles, “come on, you know you think he’s cute too.” 

You roll your eyes and stick close to her. You follow her out to the street and quickly turn away. You send one last look over your shoulder. You don’t think he’d follow you this far. You grab onto Kara’s arm and set your sights ahead of you. 

“Sleepover!” You chime, doing your best to hide your anxiety. 

🎮

You’re sad to leave Kara. She made a crummy day brighter with a fun night. Still, you’re relieved to go back home. Where you can be alone, where you can forget. 

You catch an early Greyhound and hug your bag to you as you doze, waking with each lurch of the axle. Back in town, you disembark and sigh. You still have a shift tonight. It’s a good excuse to avoid that little needling at the back of your mind. 

You still can’t believe it. How many years had you been warned against meeting people on the internet? For how much of your life has that faceless avatar online been the boogeyman to fear? And yet, he sent you pictures, you spent hours gaming together, and you trusted him. Yes, you’re that stupid. You really trusted Jacob—Andy. 

You drop your stuff at home and shower as your grandmother grumbles into a cup of tea. As you emerge, her eternal scowl curls her lips. You go to the kitchen to wash her used dishes and come back out, hoping the chore appeases her. She doesn’t say a word as she sorts through her knitting needles. 

Right. As grim as the house can be, you find comfort in that nothing has changed, even if you feel like your world has. You don’t even want to look at your Switch. That one possession you treasured above all. It’s the most expensive thing you own. You saved for months to get one, it connected you to outside, it helped you escape, and now it’s just another reminder. 

You grab your purse and head off for work. You message Kara to check in. Uh oh, she says Calvin is in town. Not this again. 

You go to hit reply on her message and another notification pops up. You tap it before you can stop yourself. It’s him. Andy. He’s been texting but you haven’t answered, you haven’t even looked to block him. You don’t know why you haven’t just hit that magic button but you just avoided everything about him. 

‘Please. I’m sorry. Can we please talk?’ 

It’s no different than the litany of texts before hand; ‘we can mine and talk this out’; ‘I wanted to tell you the truth for so long, I just thought you had the right to hear it face-to-face'; ‘hope you got home safe. Please text when you have a moment’; one after another, changing from one tone to the others; desperate, apologetic, concerned... 

Before you can dismiss the conversation, he messages again. 

‘You’re reading my messages. I see the checkmark. Please, just give me a chance to explain.’ 

You sniff and shake your head. You mute your phone and bury it at the bottom of your purse. You don’t want to talk to him but you just can’t bring yourself to get rid of him entirely. For a year he was your friend. Maybe just a gaming buddy but a constant that you came to count on.  

You would login and just shoot the shit; chat about your day; just let it all out and not think as you dug up diamonds or raced around Moo Moo Meadows. That’s all gone now and it hurts just as much as the rest of his lies. It isn’t just that he isn’t Jacob, it’s that you told him things you didn’t even tell Kara. He had been your safe harbour because he was far away, because anything you said could never come back to you. 

Your eyes sting and your cheeks pinch. Stupid, again. You shouldn’t be this emotional about this. Forget about it. You got work.  

Work? Scooping ice cream? God, how pathetic you must have sounded to him. He’s a lawyer or something? At least that what he claimed when he’d still been Jacob. You knew at first glance the type of man he is; established, professional, and older. So much older. 

Yeah, your problems must have seemed so minuscule and immature. Oh, you flunked a pop quiz? Not like you have to pay a mortgage.  

Urgh. You shake off the nipping embarrassment as you enter the booth and pull on your apron. Maybe you don’t have that much going on, but you’re trying. You’re young. You’re learning. What’s his excuse? 

🎮

You should have done this a lot sooner. You don’t know why you didn’t. Maybe because it didn’t matter before. Before, Jacob was just a boy you played Minecraft with. He was just a voice in a headset. But now, he’s... not. He’s Andy. No. 

He’s dead. 

You stare at the search result and your heart sinks. That, at least, is true. Jacob Barber; death date, last year. The pictures even match. Just a skinny kid, smiling beside his dad and mom. She’s gone too. Lost in the same accident. 

You kick yourself for being so careless. If you’d just searched him up a year ago. Even just reverse searched those pictures, you would’ve pieced it together. The only thing you can be thankful for is that it wasn’t worse. That you’re safe and you can just leave it behind. 

Well, that’s what you want to do. 

You scroll through the rest of the results. There's more, before the death. Articles about a murder and suspects. Jacob was one. What? 

It’s all so messy you can hardly make sense of any of it. You stop and sit back. You think of the man who sat across from you, you remember the look in his eyes, the flicker in his voice. He did sound sorry. 

And after everything? A police investigation then to just lose your son like that? Your only child. 

You know you don’t owe him anything. He lied to you. He had every chance to be honest, from the very beginning. Maybe you wouldn’t have wanted to play with a middle-aged man but maybe you could’ve helped him find somebody. You could’ve at least shared gaming tips.  

It isn’t about him. It’s about closure. This is just a blip on the radar. You have bigger things to worry about. Your grandmother, work, school. The summer’s flying by and tuition fees are higher than last year. Your interest payments are going to spike and you foresee a second job on the horizon. 

You look at your phone, entranced by it. You stand and walk in circles. You come back to your small desk and pick up the cell. The little chat bubble at the bottom has that red dot in the corner; unread messages. You tap it and the dot disappears. 

Jacob-- 

Andy’s chat opens and you slowly key in your message, several times over before you get it right. 

‘I’m signing into the server. I’ll be on until nine. No mining, talking.’ 

That’s it. That’s all. You can’t go back to what it was. You want this to be over. You’re closing the book, cutting the strings. He needs to know what he did was wrong and you need to move on. 

You take a breath and try to calm your nerves. Now that you’ve sent the message, you don’t know if you can do it. It’s too late, he saw it. 

You move slowly as you boot up your switch and plug in your headset. Your heart is racing like crazy. You’re going to have a panic attack. You feel the same wave of nausea you felt back at the con. Ugh. 

You load the server and almost as soon as the textures appear, he joins. Your lip trembles. You hear his mic scuff but he says nothing. No, you’re not here to listen to him. He has to hear you and then you’re done. 

“I’m sorry about your son,” you begin. 

“I... thanks.” 

“But it’s not an excuse,” you interrupt him, “what you did was so wrong.” 

“I know.” 

“Please, let me get this out,” you insist, your voice shaking. “I can’t understand what you’ve been through. I looked it all up and I know that it’s a lot. I, obviously, have never dealt with any of that. You know that, because I told you. Because I trusted you,” you frown as you inhale sharply, tears pricking in your eyes, “because I thought you were my age, that you were him, your son. Your dead son.” 

You shudder and shake your head, gulping thickly. 

“Do you not see how fucked up that is?” 

He sighs, “I know. I promise you, I wanted to tell you. That’s why... that’s why I wanted to meet. Because you deserved to know and I had to tell it to your face. You deserved that--” 

“Did I deserve to be lied to? Huh? Why—Why did you need to do all that? Why couldn’t you just tell the truth?” 

He sniffles. You’re silent, choked by the sob trapped in your throat. 

“I... He’s gone. I missed him so bad and I wasn’t thinking straight. It’s not an excuse, you’re right,” his voice is raspy, “I... you reminded me of him. Playing his favourite game helped me get through. It was wrong. All of it. I’m not saying you should forgive me, but I’m trying to explain as best as I can. I still don’t really understand why I did it.” 

You swallow and wipe your wet eyes, “you’re right. I don’t need to forgive you. I don’t. I only came on here to say what I needed to before I delete this world. I might be young and stupid but I think you need help. Real help, not some girl on a headset.” 

“Please--” 

His voice cuts off as you hit quit. You feel a pang of guilt. You do feel bad for him but you hope he heard you. You can’t forgive what he did to you, but you can wish the best for him. You hope what you said can make him get the proper help.

[scoops-aboy86]

Realize You’re Living (Secret Admirer pt 5)

Steddie Week 2024, July 5: Reunion / exes to lovers or getting back together / Wasted Years by Iron Maiden

Sorry. Not for the delay in posting, I just think I'm gonna get yelled at for reasons.

wc: 2815 / rated: T / set between seasons 2 and 3 / also on ao3

There isn’t time to send Steve another letter before Friday. 

There isn’t time, not through the mail, and there’s no way Eddie is risking physically putting something in the Harrington’s mailbox himself. That would mean running the risk of someone finding out, and that still ignites an old fear in the most primal part of his brain that screams at him to run. No matter who it is. 

On the other hand, standing Steve up for their phone date is not an option. The very idea makes his insides freeze over. They’ve both had to reassure each other that they want to continue this epistolary romance, Jesus H. Christ—there’s been too much hot and cold already to pull something like that. 

Eddie rolls over on his bed to lay face down and screams into his pillow. It's like they’re in a relationship, except Steve doesn’t even know who he is. It's absurd. An absolute clown town of his own making.

Okay. Okay, no, he can do this. (Can he?) All he has to do is relax and stay calm until tomorrow night. He’ll call at 10:30 on the dot and play Steve some Iron Maiden or something, maybe a little Dio, a smidge of Black Sabbath, throw in a dash of Judas Priest… Basically play the guy a mix tape, live. 

He whips his head up and all but dives for his side table, looking for the tin where he keeps his weed. It’ll help him chill out enough to come up with a song list. And he needs all the chill he can get. He’s lost his mom to cancer, his dad to addiction and prison, and his childhood home with them—he refuses to lose Steve if he has even half a chance of actually having Steve. Because if this whole secret admirer thing is going where he hardly dares to hope it is, this could be the most important mix tape of his entire goddamn life. 

Steve spends all of Friday so on edge that Robin starts threatening to drop banana peels in the circuit he keeps pacing behind the counter. 

“What is with you today, dingus?”

He stops, tapping his foot restlessly and removing his hat so he can rake a hand through his hair. “Nothing, nothing, I… have an important call tonight, is all. I think.”

She raises an eyebrow at him. “Oooh, is it a pretty girl?” she teases.

“Maybe,” he mutters with a halfhearted shrug. He really still doesn’t know, and it doesn’t seem likely he’ll find out tonight. “I’m not even sure they’ll call. It’s… kind of a blind date sort of thing.”

“A blind phone date?” Robin looks like she doesn’t know what to do with that, which. Fair. “Is that a thing?”

Steve shrugs again. He goes back to pacing. “It might be. I’ll find out tonight I guess.”

She gives him a minute before butting in again, spraying more Windex on the display case to get the lunch rush’s grubby child fingerprints off the cool glass. “...Is this because of the board?”

Again, Steve stops. “What?”

“The You Rule / You Suck board. Have I accidentally degraded your confidence in yourself so much that you’ve turned to blind dates as an alternative to trying to seduce any and every girl who walks in here?” 

Her tone is flippant, but because they’ve been on better terms recently—especially since Steve started offering her rides (and let her take control of the tape deck after that time she threatened to throw all of his Wham! tapes out the window)—he decides to take it as a genuine question. 

“No. Well—No, it’s more the hat than that. It messes up my best feature, you know?” He runs a hand through his hair again, fluffing it up more, then slumps against the back counter next to the milkshake blenders with a sigh. “It’s kind of a pen pal thing. We’ve been talking for a while but we haven’t met, but… I think it might be going somewhere good.”

Robin stops her bored polishing of the display case, only half of the afternoon rush’s smudges and fingerprints wiped away, to laugh with a slight shake of her head. “Oh wow, King Steve is a romantic. Who knew?”

“Not me before junior year, that’s for sure,” he scoffs honestly. 

She studies him thoughtfully for a moment. “Makes sense. Kind of lines up with something I heard the other day, when—”

But then they’re interrupted by a couple strolling in for some ice cream. Robin rushes through cleaning the rest of the glass so as to get out of their way, and Steve scoops and rings them up while she moves on to wiping down tables, conversation forgotten. 

Eddie���s finished his playlist and his plan is to call early. Not too early, just… a minute, five minutes tops. His uncle leaves for work before 10, so he has plenty of time and he’s buzzing with nervous energy. 

Way too much nervous energy to carry into the Big Call tonight. 

By the time Wayne is out the door, Eddie’s already started on rolling a joint and rereading Steve’s letters from start to current. If he’d been smart he would’ve written out copies of his own for a more complete read, that in depth analysis his English teachers never shut up about… but alas. 

Usually his memory is pretty good, especially when it comes to his own work. He also hadn’t expected this to go on as long as it had; not really. But now he can hardly imagine what it would be like to know Steve only from a distance anymore and that… colors things. Fuck only knows what he’s remembering wrong because of a simple difference in perspective. 

Because Steve has let him in, Eddie acknowledges as he lines the weed up on the paper. He’s written things about his home life, about his old friends, and definitely about his injuries over the past couple years (though oddly enough never much about what actually caused them) that Eddie would bet good money that no one else knows, if only because Steve doesn’t seem to have anyone else to tell. Maybe those kids he babysits (begrudgingly but genuinely dotes on, Eddie’s seen it from a distance). But really, how much can you realistically talk to a thirteen year old? Eddie remembers being thirteen; he hadn’t listened to anyone for shit. It was a miracle Wayne hadn’t just released him into the woods like a wild animal. 

And all Eddie’s been doing is pulling Steve close, while steadfastly keeping him out. God. 

He licks the joint to seal it, lights up, and keeps rereading. 

Steve is standing by the phone in his kitchen watching the second hand on the clock. How it sneaks around the clock face, slow but steady, until it laps the 12 line and it’s 10:31. 

He slumps back against the kitchen island with a groan. That had been an absolutely excruciating minute, and he’s staring down the barrel of another fifty-nine more until he can reasonably give up hope. Because anything under an hour is just running late, right? Something could have come up, something unavoidable like… family coming home unexpectedly, making a private conversation impossible. 

… Okay, maybe that was a stress dream he’d had last night about his parents, but something like it could happen to anyone.

10:32. The second hand barely makes it past fifteen this time before the silence is split by the shriek of ringing in the otherwise silent house. Steve multitasks, jumping out of his skin and lunging to answer the phone at the same time.

“HelloHarringtonresidence, thisisStevehowcanIhelpyou?” he rushes out. 

There’s no response except breathing on the other end of the line, which would be creepy if it weren’t exactly what he was hoping for. 

(Eddie is pressing a hand over his mouth, keeping in an equal parts amused and disbelieving laugh at how Steve had answered the phone, all flustered and cute and overly formal in an automatic sort of way that suggests an ingrained habit. From what he knows about Steve’s parents, he’s not terribly surprised, but it’s still such a delightfully dorky greeting.

And it seems like Steve really was waiting by the phone for his call, which makes Eddie want to fucking dance.)

“Is that you?” After a second, a light bulb goes off in Steve’s head and he adds, “Oh. Uh, tap once for yes, twice for no?”

It takes a few seconds, but then he hears a single tap against the plastic of the other receiver. 

(Smart, Eddie would tell him if he could. If he dared. He sucks hard on the last of his joint before letting the smoke billow from his nose like a dragon and putting it out in the ashtray by his bed. Maybe he mashes it in a little harder than necessary, blaming it for being late even though that’s really just another one of his bad habits at this point.)

Relief breaks over Steve like a wave. “Oh my god, it’s you. You’re the, um, my secret admirer?”

Tap. 

(Yeah sweetheart, it’s me.)

Steve does a little bounce on the balls of his feet and pumps his fist, too giddy to feel stupid about it with no one watching. “Holy shit. I mean, t-thanks for calling. Sorry, my parents make me answer the phone like that.” 

Nothing. 

(Eddie is smiling. Beaming, really. I figured, he imagines saying. At first it makes his heart feel full just thinking about it, but then has to stop that line of thought before his anxiety conjures up all the ways Steve Harrington, until recently Hawkins High’s resident ladies man, might react to the surprise of being on a phone date with a guy. Jesus, how is he high and still so nervous?)

“Right, you can’t answer. I mean, you can, if you want, but you don’t have to. This is, this is to see how I like your music.” Steve rubs awkwardly at the back of his neck. “Did you want to play something for me now, or…”

Tap. 

(All the tapes are on standby, spread out in chaotic order around the second-hand player he got last year after Wayne’s old one crapped out on him. Eddie cranks up the volume as high as it’ll go; he’s used to it, the neighbors are resigned to it, and Steve won’t be able to hear it well enough to count through the phone otherwise.)

The first song starts, and Steve twists the phone cord between his fingers as he stands in his kitchen and listens. There’s a heavy beat and a noticeable bass line, even over the phone, nothing like the pop rock he usually listens to. But…

“… I definitely didn’t hate it,” he says once the last notes fade out. 

(Eddie is vibrating as he hits pause and ejects the tape, elated, a few of his worries already soothed. Steve doesn’t hate metal. That doesn’t necessarily mean Steve will like him, but it’s got to make the odds at least a little better, right? He wants to say fuck yeah or I love you or, fucking… shriek wordlessly or something, but presses his hand over his cotton-dry mouth instead, hard enough that his gums ache a little.)

“It kind of reminded me of AC/DC? Like Back in Black, or Hells Bells.”

(They’re not one of Eddie’s favorites, didn’t even make the playlist. But they’re harder rock than he expected Steve to be familiar with, and suddenly he has a wild urge to know what the guy thinks of You Shook Me All Night Long.)

“One time, the radio played Big Balls in the car and my mom literally clutched her pearls and said, ‘I don’t think he’s talking about ballroom dancing, Richard!’” 

(Eddie grins as the funny little falsetto Steve put on for the impression fades into a rich laugh, like he’s so tickled by the memory that he can’t help it. There was probably some appalled, classic white-anglo-saxon-protestant-sucking-on-a-lemon expression on her face that he’s picturing, while Eddie can only imagine. It’s okay, Eddie is too busy wanting to pour Steve’s laugh into a bathtub and soak in it.)

Tap. 

“Yeah, really not,” Steve agrees, his cheeks almost aching from smiling so wide. He feels lighter than air just knowing he’s on the phone with the person who’s been writing to him the past couple months, knowing he’s proving that they’re genuinely at least a little bit compatible. “So, what’s the next song?”

It goes on like that. Steve doesn’t know the artists or albums or track titles, but figures that Secret Admirer will fill him in with the next letter. There are a couple of songs that are more shouting than singing for his taste—“I like songs I can sing along to once I know the words, you know? Really belt out in the car after a long day, or something,” he explains, and gets a yes tap in response. 

(Eddie has to improvise. Instead of another WASP song, he reaches for an Iron Maiden tape he’d put aside as a half-assed backup and scours the track list, trying to decide… Ah, that one. He pops it in and turns the volume down for a second so he can check that he’s fast forwarding to the right spot on the tape.

This one’s for you, sweetheart, he thinks, lighting a second joint—not for nerves this time, but just for fun. He leans back and lets the smoke fill his lungs, fill his mind, send him floating off to whatever time of that big house Steve is curled up in so he can spiritually throw an arm around the other guy’s shoulders.)

Steve likes the instrumentals in the intro of this one. He doesn’t really track the words at first once they start—usually doesn’t, on a first listen-through, with so much new to take in. But he starts catching on to the shape of them by the first of what turns out to be the chorus. 

So understand Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years Face up, make your stand Realize you're living in the golden years

Too much time on my hands, I got you on my mind Can't ease this pain so easily When you can't find the words to say, hard to make it through another day And it makes me wanna cry, throw my hands up to the sky

So understand Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years Face up, make your stand Realize you're living in the golden years, hey!

He listens, slowly untangling himself from the long phone cord and taking a seat on one of the stools at the kitchen island. When the song finally fades out and he hears the far-off click of the tape being stopped and taken out, he asks hopefully, “It’s about seizing the day, right?”

Maybe they’re building up to telling him who they are, or at least giving him a little more. 

(Eddie freezes, not expecting Steve—who had told him he didn’t get things on the first try—to venture any insights. Especially on a song that hadn’t been on his list, a last minute change-up that he’d picked with the transformation from King Steve to just normal guy Steve in mind and how Steve seems so hung up on apologizing for the douchebag he used to be. 

Or at least, used to be on the outside. Every day, Eddie gets a little less sure that persona went much further than skin-deep.

A tiny sound curls out of Eddie’s throat, a barely audible, inquisitive hum. Something that says please, keep going. He knows Steve has heard it because of the quick intake of breath over the line.)

Steve clutches the handset so hard that his knuckles go white. It’s the first sound, the first crumb that Secret Admirer has given him that’s really them, not a tap on plastic or other people’s music. Too quiet to make out any distinguishing features, but it’s something. 

It feels like everything. 

“You could, you know,” Steve says softly. “You could… make a stand? If you told me who you are, or just anything more about you, I… I really like you. I know for sure that I want to know you. Maybe that makes me a romantic sap, but it’s true. What if we find out we could have our golden years right now?”

(Eddie is freaking out. The mellow of his high isn’t helping anymore, all the floaty syrupy hopefulness of it stripped away. Oh fuck oh balls oh shit, shit, shit!

He’s hyperventilating, knows Steve can probably hear it, and he’s nothing but a goddamn coward in the end.

He can't do this.)

There’s a single clunk, and then all Steve hears is dial tone.

Tag list: @hotluncheddie @lawrencebshoggoth @sofadofax @tangerinesteve @steviewashere

@cryingglightningg @theresebelivett @sleepy-steve @rozzieroos @lunaraindrop

@just-my-latest-hyperfixation @wheneverfeasible @swimmingbirdrunningrock @yesdangerpls @matchingbatbites

@ihavekidneys @p0lybl4nkk @grtwdsmwhr @cheesedoctor @whalesharksart

@thetinymm @envyadams-vs-me @practicallybegging @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @dauntlessdiva

@nerdyglassescheeseychick @fuzzyduxk @chaosgremlinmunson @greatwerewolfbeliever @goosesister

@dolphincliffs

[cas-backwards-tie]

Wonderstruck

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Ex!Reader

Summary: Simon Riley finally takes it upon himself to check up on his childhood best friend and ex lover. He's been torturing himself reminiscing on your relationship and what went wrong for years now. Little does he know... you're in the same boat. Having seen someone today you swore was Simon on your way to work, you too, reflect on the past.

Words: 3.2k

Warnings: Cursing, Angst, Stalking(?),

Mentions of: Drinking, Smoking, Motorcycle Riding

A/N: I don't know why but I constantly am getting inspired by certain songs, or am reminded of certain characters, and all the lyrics were just screaming childhood best friends to estranged lovers, right person wrong time Simon Riley. Nevertheless, if you'd love to listen to some versions of the song which inspired me, here we are! Line divider credit: @saradika-graphics and I'd also love to thank @penelopepine for helping me with the ending <3

He knew it was a bad idea as soon as it'd crossed his mind, yet somehow he couldn't rid himself of it time and time again. That's how he found himself here; watching you cross the street, he can't help but notice the vintage band t-shirt you have on, frayed at the edges with the little strings of the hem coming undone that you've refused to cut off. In you hands you clutch a new phone, no doubt an upgrade from the last one he'd seen you with- though it's been a while.

As you mindlessly tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, he can't help the way his insides churn. You were always effortlessly beautiful; you never had to try for anything. Even now, the way you can walk across the busy cobblestone side streets of London in high heels without seemingly second-guessing yourself, body language still poised on guard and ready in case anyone tries anything, just like he'd taught you.

It's clear from your outfit and the lipstick you’re donning that you're attempting to sway the officials at work. Maybe trying for that promotion you’d always been talking about, but never had the gumption to make today the day. What’s different about today, he wonders. You'd always been a go-getter, and truthfully, it was something Simon admired about you. Even in the moments where he'd resented it the most, the constant pestering and prodding at him in an attempt to get him to move and drag him out of the holes his dug himself into...

Where would he be now if only he listened?

What if you knew better?

He couldn't deny that the thoughts kept him up at night while he was away. Though, admittedly, more often than not it was the string of random memories that he’d get glimpses of during the day. It’d always be at the worst times, too. Two weeks ago in Berlin he’d been clapping Kyle on the back, hoping he’ll get it together as he stumbled out the pub. While Soap had the camaraderie to slug half his mate’s weight over his broad shoulders, Simon found himself unable to help as his eyes were drawn in by a couple a few paces down the block.

“Bollocks!” He’d shouted out in frustration. Double-checking himself, he didn’t have a spare cap on him, and he knew he sure as hell didn’t bring an umbrella on your little last minute ‘trip’. Not that he’d really call walking down to the local Tesco for snacks late one summer evening a trip. ‘It’ll be an adventure! Just think of it like that.’ You’d persuaded him.

“What? Are you going to melt?” He hears you joke. As his brown eyes land on your face when you turn to meet his gaze, a few steps ahead of him down the road, he can’t help the smile that breaks out across his lips upon your laughter. Sure, you may both be a little drunk after spending the evening in and having a drink or two. But it doesn’t change the way he feels about you, if anything, it makes him even more keenly aware of the way you affect him.

“Maybe. Who knows?” He teases in responses, tugging his jacket up and over his head to shield himself from the cool summer rain. Despite the time, now he’ll most likely need a shower when you get home. As he jogs to catch up and bring you under his little makeshift cocoon, you do the unexpected.

It was you, of course… he should’ve known better, always testing him, pushing him. With a gentle drop of the plastic bag full of snacks upon the side of the road you’d been strolling down, he watches as you run into the empty street. The streetlights illuminate you in a hazy orangey-yellow light as you begin to spin and twirl, dancing in the street.

With a shake of his head, he’s left stunned once again by the vast difference of your personalities. Your jeans and t-shirt are starting to get damp and discolored, and there’s a taunting, displeased remark sitting on his tongue just waiting to be made. It’s the utter joyous smile on your face as you tip your head back and relinquish yourself to your fate that leaves him wonderstruck, he thinks.

“Come on, Simon!” You beckon, finally meeting his gaze once again with that familiar carefree, hopeful look behind your irises. With an outstretched hand, he knows he can’t deny you this… and really, there’s something inside him that tells him he doesn’t want to, either.

“It’s her, innit?” He hears his Captain’s voice call over his shoulder. Pulled from his memories, Simon dismisses Price with a nonchalant grunt. As the old man tries to place a hand on his shoulder he dodges it, realizing he’s been watching the couple for longer than he’d thought. With Soap and Gaz almost to the end of the block, Simon sighs before shrugging his shoulders to right his jacket and head off in their direction for backup.

That was a time when your playfulness been more easily taken and accepted without question. No fighting, no push back, resentments… maybe that was it: he’d stopped going with the flow. He’d stopped accepting the punches and started dodging and weaving your advances at fixing things and picking up where he left you. Because while it’s too late now, he’s finally realized it for what it is: he left you in the dark, he’s the one who pushed you away, closed himself off.

That night he’d curled up in the temporary bed he’d been assigned, more memories continued to consume him. The way you’d effortlessly ease his worries on nights he’d come home stressed, feathers ruffled from whatever petty drama went on during the day. Whether it was something the guys said that stuck with him, or something he couldn’t get out of his mind when he came back from deployment. Your kisses always seemed to be the cure, your love… or maybe it was just… you.

“You know furrowing your brows like that will cause wrinkles,” you inform him, reaching out to run gentle fingers over his bunched skin.

A grunt of acknowledgment leaves his lips. “More for me to worry about, hm?” While it’s all he says, his eyes are searching over your composure.

“No,” it leaves your lips without thought, “just something to think about, be mindful of. If you’re not upset, then why furrow them?” Voice quiet in the moonlit apartment, your fingers smooth out his brows gently as you admire him. “I read something the other day about how it’s possible our body informs our mental state. If you’re tensing all the time, it won’t help your stress, Si.”

He simply hums in response, doing nothing to stop you as you ghost your lips over his for a moment before planting a loving chaste kiss to his. While big and wide warm hands find the exposed bit of skin between the hem of your sleeping pants and the shirt you wear, it’s the unexpected cool sensation that elicits a muffled gasp. Your much smaller hands are sneaking up underneath his sweatshirt to explore his abdomen, caressing him like he were made of soft silk. Your lips meet again for a chaste kiss.

Then it’s turning into something more; you have to take it slow, your lips dancing against one another, his hand rubbing your back to let you know it’s alright. As you begin to run out of breath, it’s only when you pull away, lashes fluttering against his skin that you ask him. “You know I’d love you even with wrinkles, right?”

Taken aback, he can’t help but stare. Unsure how to respond or what to do, his lips part in search of words. “Is that so?” He finally questions, hand giving your side a soft squeeze.

“My favorite boy… I love you to the moon and back… scars and all. I always have, and I always will, Simon,” you whisper, ghosting his lips again before planting one on him, “I just hope you know that.”

And at the time, he swore he did. It’s odd, really, and he wouldn’t lie to himself about it either. Simon tried dating after you, he tried hooking up, he tried it all… but it never felt right. As many times as he replays the memory, he can never get past the feeling of home. With you, it felt like home. You never made him feel expendable, or worry of the abandonment he knew would inevitably come.

For years afterward he blamed you, he saw it as your fault that you left, you abandoned him… when, maybe, really it’s finally time he admits it was him. He made it a self-fulfilling prophecy, and there was nothing you could do.

It's on your way home from work that you see them; while waiting for the bus, there's a playground in the park a few meters away. Really, the idea that human nature is predictable is always laughable at first, but only after watching people and stepping back to become an observer you've noticed from time to time that... it's more than true. Even from a distance, the children in the park look happy... but that's not what catches your eye. There's a blonde boy, and a girl, much like yourself when you were younger, playing what you can only assume is something halfway between hide and seek and tag, considering the playground offers more space and obstacles than hiding spots.

Perhaps it's the joyous looks on their little faces, or the way they unabashedly play, carefree and unaware of the adult worries and burdens the world hangs above their heads, just waiting any day to drop upon their shoulders unexpectedly. However, you can't help but reminisce on the ways you'd spent your childhood playing games much like the one the children are playing in the distance with a boy, very similar to the one before you, loving life, content, happy, simply aspiring to be the best at finding your ultimate hiding spot.

The soft squeak of the wheels coming to a halt before you and the mechanical release of air as the doors open brings your attention back to the present. Before you know it, you're on the bus, unconsciously taking a seat along the windows, hoping, just maybe you'll catch a glimpse of them as the bus drives down the road down its route. Though as you pass, the sun is beginning to set in the distance, the children departing the playground their separate ways as dusk begins to take its toll and curfew sets in place. The whole time you'd been focused on yourself, it's entirely possible that your own boy wound up beating you at your own game, finding the best spot and hiding himself away from the rest of the world.

Maybe it's the fact that you could've sworn you'd seen someone that looked almost identical to Simon on your way to work this morning, but memories continue to plague your mind for the first time in months. All the weekends he'd spent over at your house doing aimlessly silly things to fill your time, from science projects, to playing 'warrior' outside, you never felt more alive than the time you two spent together.

"I'll keep ya safe, yeah? Nothin' to worry about," Simon insists, gently guiding you to the side of the vehicle. Despite going out with your friends to the city for dinner, you both were sober. It should be fine, it would be. You'd been with him a million times... how different could it be? He'd run it by you as many times as you'd asked.

You swear it's not a good idea, but you trust him to the ends of the Earth. With a look over your shoulder, his brown eyes are steady, not uncertain in his unwavering gaze as he nods in assurance. Swinging a leg over the seat, you're in front this time. Helmets in place, hands on the clutch and brakes, you make eye contact with Simon once more before he flicks both your visors down. "Ready?" You ask him.

"More than ready, Love," he quips. With a quick shove to the kickstand, balance (with Simon's help of course), and a rev of the engine, you start the motorcycle off slowly. Gloved hands around your waist, he gives you a gentle squeeze.

He was always pushing you out of your comfort zone, that one. It was the first time you'd driven his motorcycle, and while it'd been scary and daunting for the first fifteen minutes, you eventually got used to it and it blossomed into something freeing. You understood then why he likes it, and you'd never been more grateful for someone pushing you out of your bubble. While flashes of all the kisses, caresses, and intimate moments between the two of you start to effervesce, you force yourself to remember the last time you'd seen him.

With a lingering hug, you're hesitant to let him go. Even if you know it's necessary, it's still hard... it always has been. "You'll let me know when you get in, right?" You ask, searching his eyes. They stand out from the black warpaint, his uniform always made him look handsome, even if you couldn't imagine how intimidating seeing his actual attire would be in his enemies position.

A dismissive and irritated grunt meets your ears as he shrugs your hands off. He'd packed quickly, something he's been doing more recently; taking more and more jobs, you've begun worrying for his health, not that he'd talk about it, of course. "If I 'ave time."

While you weren't able to get all the details on this excursion, you did manage to get that it was essentially a 'clean-up' for him. He had to go in and make sure that the hostages they'd had a lead on were all rescued and no one was left behind, no assailants or informants lingering or hiding. You've known that his job is hard on him. Losing people can't be easy, especially when you feel like you could've done things differently and changed the ending to their stories. Yet, you also know that throwing yourself into work the way he's been doing without talking to anyone, simply managing to pass debrief counseling by whatever meter their measuring is... not working. Not anymore, at least.

"You're running from this! You won't even answ-" you shout, gesticulating as you do everything in your power to keep the anger and worry that's tightly wound wrapped up in your gut under control, not to let anymore of it seep out than already has.

"An' you're one to talk?! You don't get to interrogate me," he argues, rounding the couch to get closer. The dark circles under his eyes scream volumes, even if he's unwilling to acknowledge whatever's going on for him. "I deal with that enough in my line o' work. Don't-"

"Simon," you say, tone holding that familiar warning tone.

You'd gotten home safely and were able to change and make something to eat. The feelings haven't left the cavity of your chest, still lingering there, the way he always does. He may be 'Ghost' on the field, yet he still haunts your memories, always making you question whether or not you did the right thing. What if only you'd done more? What if you hadn't pushed him so much? It wasn't always in a bad way, either, in fact, most of the time you'd find yourself chuckling randomly at some inside joke only the two of you share, or something he'd find funny. The stolen sweaters and hoodies you know for a fact long ago washed away his scent. Even if you swear sometimes that you can smell the faint odor of cigarettes he used to smoke. In the city when you're out with the girls you'd find yourself fondly inhaling the smell whenever a stranger would be smoking one nearby.

You'd cursed him: Simon Riley. Yet, the aching inside you he left often made you feel like he there's some sense of closure he never fully gave you. The SAS would tell you that he'd get your letters, even if you stopped writing years ago a little while after the split. You never got a response, and you never really expected one. Simon never really was one for letter writing. It was the only way you felt like you could get that closure, that part of your life done with. Ultimately, it did help you move on in some way.

A sigh tumbles past your lips as you change the channel on the television, unsure what you really feel like watching. A reality comedy show is on, something of a local prank show. It wasn't the best show, really, but it's one you used to watch a lot as a kid, and thus, another reminder of him. This one makes you smile, nonetheless. It's a good memory; nostalgia envelopes you in the way that makes you crave times that felt easier. Just when you wrap yourself in your fuzzy blanket, there's a soft rapt at the door.

Heart accelerating, eyes widening slightly, you slowly rise from the couch. The television volume isn't on loud, and while there may be light coming from it to inform a stranger you're home, that isn't enough to say that you're alone. With slow and cautious steps, you approach the door, careful to check the window near the door from a vantage point you're unseen. It's a man in a black hoodie. Panic sets in and you turn to skillfully head back toward the couch in search of your phone with quiet and quick steps. That's when it strikes you.

With all pretenses abandoned, you rush to the door and fling it open, lips parted in shock and awe. "Simon?" Searching and attempting to scan the partially shielded face, you're able to see tufts of blonde hair lit from the porch light.

"I know you've no reason to-" he starts, hands removing themselves from his hoodie's pocket, "but please let me come in and explain."

"You came back," you whisper. It's more for yourself than him, and whether it's out of bewilderment, intuitive knowing, or a premonition; you were right.

As he takes a step forward and reaches out for you with shaky hands produced from the familiar black pocket of his hoodie, you don't retract. Slow and tentative movements on both ends, he grabs ahold of one hand, thumb consciously skirting back and forth repeatedly in a form of grounding and seeking comfort. "You were right," his deep voice rasps.

Your hand cautiously seeks his cheek beneath the shield of his hood. Fully expecting to meet the spandex material of his balaclava, you're surprised by the warmth of his skin underneath your gentle touch. Wrist pushing against the cotton hood, it gives way, revealing his face. Searching his deep brown eyes for any sign he's genuine... you're met with truth.

With a weak nod you turn, leaving the door to shut softly behind the two of you.

~~~~~~~

forever taglist: @ohdamnadam , @safarigirlsp , @jynzandtonic , @moonlightsolo

[icallhimjoey]

Reinvent Love

♥ ♥          Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader 

Summary: You and Joe are treading new waters. You’re no longer flatmates, but still close. More than friends, but nothing defined. Nothing labeled. Determined to not lose what you have, though. But, can you?

CW / disclaimer: rpf, fem!reader, language, adult themes, jealousy, accusations, soft fluff, season 3 of my flatmate!joe

Author’s note: the first cracks; they're here - and, again, you don’t need to have read define close or explain us, but it’ll obviously give you backstory, which might help!

Wordcount: 3.6K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

It was silly. Joe was being silly.

He knew it, and felt so stupid for it. Like, in hindsight, the worrying felt so dumb. The constant milling shit over didn’t change anything, there was no real point to it. Although, maybe you being on his mind in this... new manner was what summoned you last night.

You just showed up, talking about a crazy day, no sad pouts, no needy touches. Just jittery movements and a lot to tell him.

Joe kind of sat back on his sofa, spread out and leaning into his left elbow and watched you pace around his lounge. Something about something a colleague had said that then turned out to be lies and you found out something by overhearing a phone call you weren’t meant to overhear – Joe was barely following along. Didn’t really try his best to, if he was honest.

He was moreso paying attention to what you were actually doing – were you even aware that you had started grabbing random things he had left lying around on his coffee table, on the kitchen island, on the counters, and one by one, put everything away where it was meant to go?  

Joe pursed a smile as he realised you knew exactly where everything went. Why did that make his chest ache in the best of ways?

This new casual form of intimacy seemed so small, but Joe felt how it smothered that little grain of doubt that resided in his chest. That little grain that had convinced him that you were probably going to fall into a new routine with your new flatmate after he moved in and, then you would probably grow close to him and Joe knew how you... no.

No.

He couldn’t think that.

It wasn’t fair on you. He caught himself trying to finish the thought a lot, but he knew it wasn’t fair. Wasn’t true. He didn’t even fully believe it. It was this thing. Still, he also couldn’t help how it simultaneously made him grow a little more possessive and made him want to prepare for the worst.

But, she was here, he had to remind himself.

She’s here.

And she was wandering around his space, letting her train of thought flow freely from her brain into his living room and he used to witness this all the time when you lived together still. Joe realised he’d actually missed it a lot, and wasn’t that the whole point? That he got to miss you now?

God, Joe missed you a lot and you were right there and he could just burst at the seams at how fucking lucky he felt.

He was a just normal guy in a normal flat with a normal relationship– well, normalish relationship, anyway. Not that you had talked about anything yet. Of course you hadn’t. But it was pretty fucking obvious what this was. So he had started shrugging whenever someone would ask if you were actually together, which felt a lot better than the forever, “No, we’re flatmates, what are you talking about?” he used to throw at people, practically gaslighting them out of whatever they thought they’d witnessed between him and the girl that he used to live with.

It was working. The plan he had made, this vague idea of normalcy; it was working out the way he had wanted it to.

And yea, sure, you were getting a new flatmate and Joe had a difficult time not feeling some type of way about that, but, he had made the decision to move out and, look at you now.

“Do you think I can get a raise out of this? Or at least get a weird bonus, mid-term?”

Joe had a hard time not laughing at your question as he saw you had already mentally moved onto something else. You were stood in the middle of the room, both hands on your hips, eyes scanning the room. Everything tidy and organised.

“Joe, when did you last clean?”

Joe followed your gaze up into one of the corners of the ceiling.

“I cleaned today.” Joe said, knowing you’d likely not take it as an honest answer. You had lived together, remember? No fucking way was Joe ever going to feel the urge to maybe sometimes swipe a feather duster across the upper corners of his living room.

You shuddered at the thought of what resided behind his curtains there.

You sighed and tutted and turned back to Joe’s kitchen like you were going to start cleaning his fucking ceilings at half past ten at night.

“Hey, no. No, no. Stop. Will you come sit down a second? My god.” Joe huffed, feigning annoyance. When you turned on your heel and giggled as you scurried over, Joe let a laugh escape his throat just before you let yourself fall into the cushions next to him.

He hooked an arm around your neck to pull you in so he could press his nose into your cheek a second. You gladly let him, and when he held you close like that for longer than you initially thought he would, you suddenly realised you’d just been talking about yourself for twenty minutes straight.

Just barged in with unimportant thoughts on your mind that you just verbally vomited right into Joe’s space. You knew it was mostly nervous energy that was only there because your new flatmate picked up his keys earlier, which now meant there was every opportunity for someone to just... walk into your flat at any given time. That had unexpectedly brought on way more anxiety than you previously thought it would do.

Hence why you decided to just... escape it, and went over to Joe’s to spend the night there.

Joe was pressing his nose into your cheek and held you in place for a bit before he moved his head down, hiding into your neck a second.

“You okay?” you asked softly, head tilting down a bit.

“Mm, yea, fine.” Joe inhaled deeply, before pressing a few small kisses to the crook there and moving back to look at you the in eye. He unhooked his elbow from around your neck and placed two cupped hands on either side of your face, swiping bits of hair back in the process.

Joe was leant all the way back into the sofa, head squished in between two of the back cushions and you took a moment to look at each other. Joe studied your face and rubbed his thumbs across the apples of your cheeks until you grew shy.

“You look tired,” you softly said before Joe sat up a little and leant closer. It had you close your eyes just before scrunching up your nose as he kissed the very tip of it.

“I am tired.” He mused, copying your nose scrunch when you blinked your eyes open again, and Joe looked so soft. Sort of pleased with life, happy to be where he was and like he’d just had a really good productive day. He blinked slowly, eyes only half open, and looked sleepy enough to slip right into dreams the second his head would hit his pillow.

You loved him like this. His hands on you, all soft touches. Comfy and cosy and calm. Just you and him. No one else. No threat of someone randomly walking in.

This was perfect.

“Mmm, me too.” You smiled and let Joe grab one of your elbows to pull an arm across his stomach as he sat back again.

“I’m not surprised. You’ve just done a 5K as you tidied this room, I think.”

You huffed a laugh as you sank into Joe’s side, and then you sat like that in silence for a moment. No TV on. No phones in sight for some easy distraction. Just you and Joe and the view of his living room.

“Are you okay?” Joe suddenly asked, emphasis on the you, and you tried hiding the small, hitched intake of breath by quickly nodding and casually going, “Yea. Fine.”

You could feel how Joe tucked in his chin to look at you.

He waited. Wasn’t going to tell you, “No, be honest...”, but also wasn’t going to accept it and move on. It was still like that. He knew you were lying, and you knew he knew, no words shared at all.

So you sighed and took a second, and then said, “Josh picked up his key today.”

And you didn’t want to explain what that meant.

Didn’t want to tell Joe that, for a while, this existing-in-two-flats thing had just felt like a bit of a joke. Just the two of you playing and being silly about whatever you really were. You still sort of thought of him as a flatmate because he still came over all the time, and you went over to his all the time too. You existed in the same space almost just as much as before, sort of.

But now a new flatmate was actually moving in, and suddenly, it felt like reality had slapped you right across the cheek like it had done that day that Joe moved out.

You’d gotten to hide away for a lot of that.

And there was no real hiding this time around.

You couldn’t go home and pretend Joe was going to move back in eventually, because now Josh’s things were going to be all over the flat. Which was fine. Josh signed a lease. His things were allowed to be all over the place.

It was just... things were getting real now.

Shit was real.

“Which reminds me,” you suddenly piped up, pushing uncomfortable thoughts down, tucking those away for another time and place. “This is going to save you some money!”

You saw how Joe’s mouth slowly stretched into a smile as he watched how his own feet rubbed against yours. Then he caught himself and quickly furrowed his brow, saying, “No, I don’t think it works like that.”

You copied his expression, but were more confused than anything else.

“Of course it does. Josh signed the papers, he’s going to start paying rent now, you–”

“I said that I had taken care of things, didn’t I?” Joe interrupted you, fingers playing with the folds in your sleeve of the arm that rested over his stomach. “Can’t just not keep a promise like that.”

You blinked at him a second, then moved to sit up to stare at him harder. If both Joe and Josh paid rent, that basically meant that you... got to live for free for a while? That math wasn’t mathing. One plus one wasn’t equalling two here. You looked around Joe’s flat and tried to think of his own expenses, and... what the fuck was he doing?!

“Joe,”

“You’re not going to be able to talk me out of this.”

“Joe.”

Joe ignored you and faked a yawn, sped it up along with stretched out arms above his head and quickly said, “So tired. Bed?” before getting up and leaving you on his sofa as he left the room.

“You’re insane if you think I’m just going to accept that!” you called after him and heard him laugh from down the hall.

“Did you not just say you were after a weird mid-term bonus?”

And you hated how that made you smile. Made you punch one of the cushions and sink your teeth into your bottom lip begrudgingly as you forgot to breathe a second.

Joe smiled to himself too as he turned on the lights in his bathroom. It felt like he was winning a contest - there was no contest, no one to fight, not really, but, he was definitely winning.

“You coming?”

Breathe.

Calm down.

You could pretend to fight him on this once more in the morning.

Crawling into bed with Joe had its own little routine which was different from the one at yours. Different order of things, because the lay out of the flat was different.

Bathroom first. You brushed teeth together, always had to stop Joe when he washed his face too aggressively and then used your own moisturiser on him. “Just for your dry patches,” you’d always say, but would end up swiping delicate fingertips all over anyway. There’d be a snarky comment, of you using too much, of him feeling too greasy, of how he was going to stick to his pillow all night now, and then you’d always kiss him to shut him up before moving on to do your own skincare routine.

When you’d get into bed, Joe would already be in there, giving his phone a last once-over before he’d scoot down and get comfortable.

This time, however, when you walked into his bedroom, the lights were already off, and it looked like Joe was already falling asleep.

This soft man.

So sleepy.

He was all messy curls and bare arms, duvet tucked under them, curled up right in the middle of his bed. You slid in and cuddled up right behind him, hips against his bum, chest to his back.

You were right.

Joe was already falling asleep.

You pushed a leg in between his for warmth and snuck an arm around his front.

“You’re crazy,” you whispered into the skin of his shoulder which prompted Joe to grab hold of your hand and pull it into his chest so you were hugging him properly. The big spoon to his small one. Then he just hummed as you pressed a small kiss to his warm skin there.

“So crazy.” you nuzzled into his pillow, your nose rubbing his back as you did, and you felt how he ducked his head down to press a small kiss to your fingers.

You fell asleep warm, comfortable, and smiling.

You woke up in the same way.

Just on your stomach now, and with Joe’s heavy limbs slung over your body. When you turned over, it woke Joe up, and for five blissful early morning minutes, you tried crawling into each other’s skin as best you could. Breathed each other’s breath and tasted each other’s skin. Stroked hands underneath clothes and had fingers crawling into underwear, just to touch and to hold.

When you quietly asked if Joe wanted coffee, he groaned and told you to shut up. He was able to feel you giggle to that, and he could cry with how happy he felt in that moment. Why would you have to go and ruin it by getting up to go and make coffee?

“Five more minutes.”

“Mmm... it’s never just five.”

Joe sighed, “Just five.” speech slurring with early morning drowsiness and then burrowed himself into you even more.

And fine.

Joe could have five more minutes.

But then they easily turned into twenty, because they always did, and you had to eventually bribe Joe with breakfast for him to let you go so you could sit up.

“If you take a slow shower, I’ll have it ready when you finish.” You looked over your shoulder where Joe, still with his eyes closed, smiled widely. His nose was slightly red from pressing it into your skin, and his bedhead made you have to suppress a giggle that you hid by leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead before you got out.

Joe barely even felt that little grain of bad in his chest when he thought of how much he loved you.

Because he did.

Joe fucking loved you.

There was going to be a moment soon where he was just going to have to say it. It was going to spill out of him in some other way if he wouldn’t simply use the words, he just knew it.

Joe loved you as he watched through squinty eyes how you reached for a pair of white socks of his to borrow.

Loved you as he watched you pull one of his old sweaters over your head before you walked out, bare legs still on show.

Loved you when he stepped into his living room after his shower to the smell of burnt toast and scrambled eggs and coffee.

Loved you as he watched you step onto a chair in the corner of his room, wet dishcloth in hand to remove the strings of dust you had scolded him over the night before.

Loved you as he felt what the sight of your stretched body, your bare tighs, and the little peep of your bum did to him inside of his boxers.

Loved you as he groaned and let his head fall onto the counter, having to breathe through it, because you were just cleaning his living room, and not giving him a sensual striptease act or whatever.

Loved you as you looked back over your shoulder, raising your eyebrows in surprised confusion before accusingly asking, “Really, Joe? Cleaning?”

Loved you as he stutteringly defended the blood rush down south by saying, “You have no idea what you look like right now.” into his elbow where he had to hide his face for a second.

Loved you, loved you.

He was hardly able to deny any of it.

And he didn’t feel that he had to, either.

Because, you were there. In his flat. In his clothes. Cleaning his dusty ceiling corners. And wasn’t that just something he wanted to tell the whole fucking world about?

That small little green grain of doubt and worry and negativity dried out and got no sunshine to really grow into anything. Thank fuck.

He got to ignore it for a while.

Forgot about it entirely, and pretended it wasn’t even there for a bit.

It was easy.

Joe loved you.

He knew he did.

Would tell you soon.

Didn’t know how.

Or where.

But he was going to say it.

He was going to use his words because he was just a normal guy who loved a normal girl and you weren’t being weirdly secretive about what you got up to in private. At least, not how you used to be, anyway.

Joe loved you.

You brought Joe flowers and cleaned his ceiling and wore his clothes and cooked his breakfast.

Joe loved you, even though your new flatmate Josh turned out to be impossibly good-looking in addition to being incredibly kind as well, so Joe didn’t even get to have a real reason to dislike him at all, which seemed unfair, but, all right.

Joe loved you, even when suddenly two shiny black acoustic guitars appeared on your living room wall, because Josh worked in music, and wasn’t that just so cool?

Joe loved you, even though his very first thought after that was, well I know how to play guitar too, don’t I?! which you had never even mentioned before.

Joe loved you, even when he walked into your flat one evening and interrupted a dinner you were having with Josh and one of your friends and, look, Josh cooked for us, and for the first time ever, he felt uninvited and intruding.

Joe loved you, even when your friend jokingly said, “You’re over here at lot for someone that moved out.” right to his face, to which you then heartily laughed, because she was only joking, Joe, and then you didn’t say anything about how you were together, but, you were together... weren’t you?

Joe loved you, even when he stuck to the bit and handed you his flat key like he always did, expecting to find it in his coat pocket later, but then ended up finding both his pockets empty when he went home the next morning, which, yea actually, that made sense, because Josh lived there now, and it was a little weird to have a key still, wasn’t it?

Joe loved you, even when you had told him to come over on Friday evening because you’d had a shit day at work, and for the first time ever, he had to ring the doorbell to get inside.

Joe loved you, even when Josh was the one that answered the door, and Josh almost didn’t let him in, telling him, “Oh, she’s fallen asleep on the sofa, mate.” to which Joe just smiled as he stepped around him, because what the fuck did Josh even know about falling asleep on the sofa in this flat?

Joe loved you, even when he found you asleep on the sofa, curled up under a blanket he’d never seen before, with an empty pizza box bar some crusts still on the coffee table, and you never ate a whole pizza yourself, so that was obviously shared with someone else.

Joe loved you.

He knew he did.

But there was a playstation besides the TV now, and a cool record player on the side, pile of vinyl next to it, and, God.

Joe fucking hated this.

Whatever was inside of Joe’s chest, that thing he didn’t even want in there, was growing.

Was getting fed without Joe even fully realising he was feeding it.

He hated those guitars. He hated that he no longer had a key. He hated that stupid blanket. And he hated that empty pizza box.

Still, he sat down beside you and placed your socked feet onto his lap. Watched the last scenes of whatever film you’d put on as he slowly kneaded a foot and let you sleep, and he tried his best to not get bitten. To not let it sink its teeth in. To not let it hurt.

It was silly.

Joe was being silly.

Rational thought saved him.

Rational thought told him he still loved you.

And he hoped rational thought was going to be enough.

---

The Taglisted

@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson,

@choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn,

@dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma-munson, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee,

@figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4,

@hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke,

@lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @munsonluvrr,

@munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories,

@phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn628, @sidthedollface2, @solzi1420,

@songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73,

@werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo

taglist currently full, sorry

[danikamariewrites]

Nexus Being

Cazriel x reader

A/n: Happy poly week day 3! I am so excited to give you this scarlet witch reader fic and hope you like it. @polyacotarweek

Warnings: slight angst and fluff at the end

You pace in front of the hearth in Rhys’s office. Lost in thought, sorting through the pros and cons of what your High Lord, friend, and brother has just asked of you. 

Rhys leaned forward. His elbows on his knees, jaw clenched as he waits for your response. The High Lord didn’t feel good about asking this of you. But Helion couldn’t come up with a solution nor Thesan. Prythian was out of options and you are the last resort. 

You stop, inhaling deeply before closing your eyes. Rubbing at your face you turn to Rhys. That distressed look from when he asked you the unfathomable still pulling at your features. 

“She didn’t leave me the book.”

“I know, but you have to understand-”

“No, Rhys,” you say as calmly as you can, “she didn’t leave me the book.” 

The High Lord nods slowly, taking in the vital information you just dropped on him. “She did leave me other books. Spells that can help but that one is gone. I can come up with something but I need all the time you can give me.” 

“I will do what I can, but delaying Koeschi doesn’t seem likely.” Your eyes wander as you think. 

“I haven’t done this since before she died. Not even Cass and Azriel know.” 

“I can tell them if you want.” He offers gently. “No,” you whisper. “I’ll tell them myself. I just need time.” Rhys nods again. It seems like that’s all he can do right now.

———

The first step was Windhaven. The next, a High Lords meeting. Your stomach was in knots over the thought of telling your mates who you are. What you inherited. 

Your mother, an advisor to Rhys’s father, was the infamous Scarlet Witch. A gift that wasn’t supposed to be passed down. Or so harshly. According to Rhys you rivaled your mother in power. 

Scared of the potential destruction you could cause to the world or reality you buried your powers. Only letting magic out when there was an unbearable tightness under your skin. You passed it off as the magic you inherited from your High Fae father. But that can only explain so much. 

Staring at the suit you made changes to to fit your body and be more in line with your fashion sense. Your eyes quickly glancing over the crown that rests across your forehead has you losing a shuddering breath. An intimidating gift indeed. 

You could hear Cassian and Azriel changing into their leathers in their own closet. Speaking in hushed tones. 

Your mates still don’t know you are going with them to Windhaven. Rhys couldn’t give you the time you needed. Thanks to Koeschi’s new impatience the plan has been moved up by weeks. 

A knock on your closet door had you jumping out of your skin. A ring clad hand resting over your chest to keep your rapidly beating heart inside. It was now or…later you guessed. Better now. 

Slightly opening the double doors so your mates could only see you, you stare up at them. They tried their best not to look so tense but failed miserably. “Hey y/n/n, we just wanted to say bye. It’ll be a few days but we’ll be home before you know it.” Cassian said softly, cupping your face in his large hands. Azriel’s shadows began to stir curiously. His eyes narrowed as two floated up to his ears. You swallowed nervously which Cassian mistook as longing for your mates. 

But Azriel knew. Knew you were holding back. Opening the doors wider you look down at the duffle bag you packed hours ago when Rhys told you to. The males looked down then back to you confused. “Why are you…” Azriel trails off. One of his shadows quickly darts into the closet to investigate your secret. When it hits the shield you put up a red ripple, like a rock hitting a pond's smooth surface, disturbs the darkness of your closet. Opening the doors all the way you turn your back on your mates. Not wanting to see their reactions. 

“I have something to tell you.” Your shoulders tense as you feel their apprehensive gazes on you. Raising your hand a pinkish-red light surrounds your fingers. Waiting to do your bidding, to be shaped in your image. With a slight swish of your fingers the shield dropped, revealing your black and scarlet ensemble with the crown to match. 

Turning back to face them you had silent tears running down your cheeks. Their mouths opened as shock took over. They knew that crown. What power you possess. Before the males could ask questions you went on.

”My mother was the Scarlet Witch. As you know she was part of Rhys’s fathers council. I was never supposed to inherit her power, but the universe has other plans. I know she is supposed to be a horror story. But my mother was the kindest woman I knew. She taught me everything to know about wielding this…unusual power. 

“I don’t know everything though. When she died her book went with her. I’m not sure if it just turned to dust or if the gods placed it elsewhere. Truthfully, I’m glad it’s gone. The thing turned sane people mad and I had no interest in ever opening it. My first lesson was that all magic comes with a price and there is a lot I’m not willing to pay for.” 

You turn to face them, standing taller than before, tears now dried. “I’m coming with you. Rhys asked. And before you say anything, know he gave me a choice. I am doing this to save us.” Your voice broke on the last word. Tears threaten to spill again at their silence.  

There was a quiet rage swimming in Azriel’s eyes as he held his tongue, not daring to speak in case he said something he regrets. His eyes glued to your suit. Cassian was in awe of you. Of the power you hold. The bond humming as the full power between the three of you is revealed. 

All Cassian did was hold out his hand to you. Showing he did not fear you. Waving your hands over your torso that scarlet light runs down your body, dressing you in your suit and crown. 

When your mother wore it you thought it was the most beautiful piece of clothing. Now that you wear it you don’t know what to think.

It is your now though. The cloak clasped around your shoulders is your mother’s broach of the three faced goddess. You kept the scarlet corset, adding a black body suit under it. The elbow length gloves stayed the same except for the fingers. You changed them to a black fabric to mimic your mothers hands after using that damn spell book so much. The boots were new too. A matching scarlet leather with black ruins painted on them for protection. 

Taking Cassian’s outstretched hand you grapes your bag in the other. He gave you a small smile. Azriel couldn’t even look at you. Wouldn’t. 

As shadows wrapped around the three of you, you reached out to Azriel only to hit a dark wall guarding his heart. 

———

The trip to Windhaven went exactly as Rhys had planned. Devlon was terrified to see the Scarlet Witch once more. The soldiers fell into line out of fear, ready to listen to Rhys and Cassian’s every command. 

You had trailed them through the camp. Head held high as you kept power eminanting from your hands. You felt uneasy about the whole thing. Like you were lying.  

As soon as you got back to Rhys’s mothers house you made a beeline for the bathroom. Gripping the the sink, closing your eyes, you take a deep breath. A soft knock on the door has your head shooting up. Looking at your reflection your eyes glued to the crown perfectly balanced on your forehead. It had never felt so heavy before.

Another knock, a little louder this time, forces you to open the door. Your met with Cassian’s soft face as he looks down at you. “Hey sweet pea, want to talk?” You nod. He steps aside, following you to the empty bedroom. You noticed your and Cassian’s bags were unpack while Azriel’s still sat at the end of the bed untouched. 

You nervously pulled at the fingers of your gloves, pacing next to the bed. Cassian gently perched himself on the edge of the bed, waving you over to stand between his massive thighs. Cass dramatically swishes your cloak out and places his hands on your hips. 

“I’m very proud of you, sweet pea. Today was tough but you got through it. It is no easy feat to face Devlon and our armies like that.” Cassian pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. Rubbing a hand up and down your spine. 

“Thank you, love.” You softly kiss his forehead, holding his jaw. It’s hard to fully accept that your mates are proud when one of them isn’t here. Azriel hasn’t spoken to you all day. Just to Rhys and Feyre when needed. Other than that he has been doing only the Mother knows what. 

Cass sends love and adoration down the bond noticing the shift in your mood. “Give him time. We’ve all had secrets, he’s just processing.” You nod, running your fingers through his hair. “Can we go to bed, it’s late?” “Of course, sweet pea.” 

Sleep evaded you that night. Trapped in Cassian’s arms you waited for Az to come to bed. Tears pricked your eyes when the sun started to come up, yet there was no sign of your mate. 

—-——

The High Lords meeting had you even more anxious than the camps. Rhys made sure you stayed hidden. 

Before heading into the meeting your High Lord asked you to wait until you were called upon. Your mates didn’t like that. They fought with their brother, accusing him of treating you like a party trick when you were so much more. “Whatever it takes to convince them.” You had bravely told the males you love. It made their bickering cease but you could still feel their unease.

As they left Azriel’s gaze lingered on you. Giving him a small wave, sending a pulse of love down the bond.  

Pacing in front of the doors to the meeting room you toy with the gold rings decorating your gloved fingers. The Day Court sentries guarding the room were tense. You could smell the fear on them as they looked everywhere but at you. 

Rhys tapped on your mental shields. The signal for you to finally present yourself. With a wave of your hand the gold and mahogany double doors open. All eyes were on you except your court. You knew they were sat with smug, nonchalant looks on their faces. “May I present, the Scarlet Witch. Born again and even more powerful than her predecessor.”   

There was an sharp intake of breath that echoes around the room. Helion and Kallias and Viviane looked surprised but bowed their heads at you. Tarquin was just exasperated. Sick of the tricks the Night Court has up their sleeves no doubt. 

Tamlin and Thesan looked shocked. Like they were ready to attack in case you breathed wrong. You stood by Rhysand, looking like the perfect picture of boredom as you stared down your nose at the Lords. 

Beron stood, surprisingly in front of his wife and children. Flames dancing wildly at his finger tips. Pointing at you Beron began his tirade. “We knew how her mother was! How dare you keep this from us Rhysand! The witch must-” Shadows swarmed the Autumn High Lord, binding him to his seat and keeping his mouth shut. 

“Must what Beron?” Azriel asked, tone cold as death. Anger danced in his eyes as he moved to the edge of his seat. Poised to attack no matter the outcome. Before the situation could escalate you hold up a hand wreathed in that scarlet light. “Thank you love, but you can let him go.”    

“If you want to have a chance against Koeschi I am your best bet.” You say staring down the High Lords. “Now,” waving your hands sending scarlet power out candles appear in a circle on the floor and floating around the room. A stack of spell books in the center of the rune on the floor, “I have casting to do and it would be best to leave me be.” 

As they head out Azriel and Cassian linger in the doorway for a few moments. You don’t look back, knowing they’d distract you. Sitting criss cross on the floor you spread the books out with a wave of your hands. Turning your hands palms up the books float up as you do keeping your legs crossed. Closing your eyes you focus on Kosechi, the spell to keep him bound to the lake, and how to rival his power.   

Hours later you're finally back in the room you're sharing with your mates. Leaning against the door you rub at your temples. Mother, you forgot how much of a headache spellcasting gave you.

Your mates stood from their chairs in the small sitting area. Looking at you like you were a power bomb ready to explode at any moment. Breezing past them you stop at the vanity, beggining to take off your rings and other accessories. The crown coming off last.

Behind you, Cassian and Azriel are having a silent conversation. Cass urging Az with his eyes to say something. Azriel clears his throat, "Y/n, can we talk?" Letting out a sigh you turn and lean against the vanity, crossing your arms. You raise a brow at him to go on.

"I want to apologize for my silence towards you, my love. Processing your powers has been a lot for me." You couldn't believe your ears. This was a lot for him? "It's been hard for you? Imagine what it's like for me! I never wanted to inherit this or control it. I live in fear of what I could potentially do to the world. I thought you, my mate, of all people would understand, especially with your shadows."

Cassian looked terrified. He just wanted peace between the three of you restored. The stare down going on between the two of you was nothing like he had ever seen before. Two different sets of dark power ready to be let loose.

Azriel broke first. His shoulders slump with silver lining those bright hazel eyes, now dim from shame. "It made me doubt the bond." You and Cassian were caught off guard by his vulnerability. "What," you whisper. Cass stepped up to hold his shoulders, leaving a small kiss on temple. "C'mon Az, tell us what's wrong."

Guiding him over to the couch, Cassian sits next to Azriel as you kneel in front of him, holding his scared hands. "When you revealed you were the Scarlet Witch all I could think of was the reality bending aspect of your powers. I immediately started having thoughts about the bond between the three of us not being real. That the Cauldron didn't gift me this love. That you created it and my world was going to come tumbling down. I know you would never do that after seeing you in the camps and at the meeting today. Hell, I knew you would never do that period.

"I'm sorry I thought so low of you. I just-I got so scared that you kept this from us, y/n. Please forgive me." He give you a pleading look as tears fall down his cheeks.

You can't deny the pain in your heart at Azriel's confession. You could never in a million years even fathom manipulating a person into a mating bond. Closing your eyes your own tears fall silently down your cheeks.

"Azriel, I would never ever do that. To either of you." Your voice wavers from the lump forming in your throat. "I can't say I'm not hurt but I do understand where you are coming from." Standing, you place yourself on Azriel's lap never breaking eye contact. He wraps his arms around your waist to keep you close. Cassian watched you both with hopeful eyes.

Placing a hand on Azriel's chest you send love down the bond. "Do you feel that?" "Yes."

"Does it feel real?" "Yes." You give him a small smile. "Then it's real Az. No spells, no witch craft. That golden thread between us is as real as the Cauldron." Azriel pulls you into a crushing hug against his chest. "I love you," he whispers into your hair. "I love you more."

"I love you most," Cassian chimes in, gathering the both of you in his strong arms. "Lets make a promise that from now on there are no more secrets between us, yeah?" You both stare up at him, nodding your heads. "Promise," you say in unison.

[riboism]

ungodly hour

pairing: j.yh x (f) reader content: pool sex, established relationship, valentine’s day, public sex, manhandling, dirty talk wc: 900

a/n: I think about that yunho dubai poolside pic maybe 2-3 times a day

“Yunho.”

He only hummed into your lips, having no intention of breaking away from the kiss just yet, no matter how much you whined. It was Valentine’s Day weekend, and Yunho surprised you with a trip to a couple’s retreat in the city. The hotel you were staying at has a pool, and your boyfriend begged you at the odd hour of midnight to come down and join him for a swim.

It was innocent at first, until a game of tag led you to be pushed up against the edge of the pool while Yunho locked his lips with you from above and teased you with his bulge below the water. He had been rubbing fronts with you for a while now, and you could feel him growing as he did. You finally managed to break away from the kiss, gasping for air as you tried to warn your very excited boyfriend.

“Someone can walk in and see us!”

He clicked his tongue and pulled you closer to him by your waist. “Trust me, no one’s going to come in this late. Come on, it’ll be fun. Didn’t you say you wanted to spice things up a bit?” He winked.

Being busy and working adults, sex with Yunho had become pretty mundane and predictable, even with all the manhandling. You suggested spicing things up and trying new things this weekend, but public sex wasn’t necessarily on your list. “I don’t know…”

Yunho’s lips trailed down to your chin before he made it to the sweet spot between your neck and shoulder. His fingers toyed with your swim top’s strap, slowly pulling it down from your shoulder. “Please baby. Need you right now.” He mumbled into your skin. He was rock hard now, mindlessly rutting his thick bulge over your clothed clit. He was so far gone that it would require a lot of work to get him off you, but if you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t want to stop just yet. Feeling his cock tease you like this only made you want him more, and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to wait until you made it back to your rooms to continue.

Reaching down into the water, you undid the knot on his swimming trunks while Yunho looked down at you with a boyish grin. He loved the pained look on your face and was completely smitten over the fact that you wanted him as badly as he wanted you right now. Trying to pull his trunks down was more difficult under water, and you looked at him with desperate and pleading eyes when he didn’t bother helping you out. “Yunho,” you cried in frustration “hurry.”

With haste, Yunho pulled his trunks down just enough to release himself. He lifted you up from the back of your thighs and you immediately locked your legs around his waist. He pulled your panties to the side and began lining his leaky tip up with your entrance, forcing a small gasp out of your lips when you felt him rubbing against your achy core. “Fuck, gonna take me right here right now, baby?” He teased.

The stretch is usually a little painful because of Yunho’s size, but the pool water helped ease you onto him better. It was too slippery for you to move, so you wrapped your arms over his neck and held on the best you could while he grabbed onto your waist and moved you up and down his length to his own pace. Sometimes, you let him choose the pace, allowing him to use your body at his will. Afterwards, he’d kiss the bruises he left from his tight grasp on your waist.

It was hard to keep quiet with the way Yunho dragged you over his cock, his hard tip reaching so deep inside you. If anyone was around, they’d definitely know what you two were up to. Yunho adored how vocal you can get, but he also didn’t want to get kicked out of the hotel in the middle of the night.

“Gotta do something about those pretty little moans baby.” He said, before dismantling you from him. His hands took authority over you, guiding you to turn around so you were sandwiched between him and the edge of the pool, your back pressed against his chest. You knew what he wanted to do next, but you let him pull your hips closer to him before he rammed into you from behind. Yunho caught your moans with his palm, his long fingers squeezing your cheeks as he did so. “Have to stay quiet, baby. Fuck, you feel so good.” He whispered into your ear. “Tiny little pussy taking my cock like this…gonna take all my cum too?”

You let out a muffled yes into his hand, earning you a chuckle from Yunho. “That’s my girl.”

The sound of your skin slapping together got more and more delayed, a sign that he was close. You dipped your hand under the water to work your way up to your own high, but Yunho already beat you to it. His fingers glided over your clit perfectly, giving you the perfect amount of pressure before you two finally reached your peaks.

Your walls clenched around him, squeezing out every last drop of his essence. His head fell into the crook of your neck, and you kissed his head softly as he calmed down.

“We have to do this again.” He panted.

You giggled at his enthusiasm. “Absolutely not.”

🎧 ungodly hour- chloë x halle

[southangel]

hi! romantic stan and kenny (separate) x reader whos afraid of the dark? like they could be hanging out and then the power cuts off? thanks ! <3

Stan and Kenny with scared of the dark Reader

Warnings: none

Notes: Gender-Neutral, also assuming they’re already dating reader. Sorry for it being a little short!

Stan Marsh

The way I see this happening would be during the very first time Stan invited you over to his house.

After weeks of dating, Stan finally felt ready to actually have you over at his house for the first time, without getting nauseous.

He told you that he wanted you to be over at 6:30 to watch a movie together, the whole time he was mentally panicking and pacing around his room on what to do.

What genres do you like? What if you don’t even like movies, maybe a show?

After you eventually came over and was sitting on the same couch as him, big achievement, light rain started pouring.

None of you minded it, well, not until there was thunder.

Stan could tell you seemed uneasy, so he held your hand, not knowing that it was because of the sky getting increasingly darker over time.

The last thing Stan expected was to hear a quick but loud scream from you as the TV shut off in-front of your eyes.

You unexpectedly grabbed onto his arm, not really meaning to like that. Nonetheless, Stan knew he shouldn’t be so happy at your action considering how terrified you seemed.

A phone flashlight was the best he could do for now, trying to comfort you the best he could even though he really isn’t that type of guy.

The best way that Stan can comfort you is through physical contact and affection, but he doesn’t know it you would be uncomfortable with that or not.

He really does care about you, he just needs to learn how to express it better.

Whenever you both have sleepovers together, Stan always remember to turn on a nightlight or keep a small light on for you just in case.

It would make him upset to know that you’re uncomfortable or scared, so he tries his best to cater towards your fear.

Since then, Stan has tried his best to help you improve and lose your fear of the dark, not caring how long it’ll take.

Stan has also gained a habit of buying you packs of glow sticks, the ones from any dollar store that you snap to light.

He wants you to always have light, in a way where you can remember him without being scared at the same time.

“I want you to think of me when you light these, okay?”

Kenny Mccormick

I feel that Kenny would be more experienced with fears like this.

Kenny has Karen to take care of, so she most likely has a fear of the dark or something similar.

Even though he doesn’t live in the best area or environment, he wants to hangout with you, which is why he invites you over.

Kenny knows that you would never judge him for his lifestyle or being poor, which is why he trusts and loves you so much.

His options were limited, but he didn’t really want to spend another day at Stark’s pond, talking about things you would both forget about the next day.

Once you came over to his house later on in the day, he took you straight to his room without even engaging with anything going on in the living room.

Kenny pulled out a box from inside his closet, revealing a board game for you both to play.

Throughout the game, there were multiple light flickers and such. You thought it was normal, normal until all the lights in his house cut out.

You didn’t know if it was the weather, problem with the electricity, or even the bills not being paid, but the cause didn’t matter as you immediately reacted.

Kenny saw how your reaction shifted playing parts on the board, shaking and speaking in an unsteady tone.

He moved over and took you into his arms, trying his best to comfort you as much as he could.

Even though Kenny was still hooded and you couldn’t really understand what he was saying, it made you feel more comforted for some reason.

Kenny would be the best at comforting you with his words and actions, even though he’s more of a physical affection guy.

He cares about you a lot, a lot to where he saved all of his money to buy you a small but portable flashlight.

Since then, you and Kenny’s relationship has grown closer, and you love how he’s considerate enough to do these things for you.

Don’t worry, you paid him back for the flashlight.

“I know it’s not much, but I want to help you as much as I can.”

[hyunsvngs]

I just read the fem skz slumber party fic! It was so so good!! Thank you for recommending it!!

Oh oh what about helping the boys through their ruts/ heats for the first time?? Who do you think would go absolutely feral and who would still be gentle...also the breeding!?....I need to chill

-🦇

AWWW NO ITS ONE OF MY FAVES IM GLAD U LOVED IT!! ANYWAY HERE ISSSS… helping the boys through their ruts/heats! i obviously didnt do the betas (changbin, seungmin, hyunjin) so these r just our alphas & omegas <3 also!! CW for pegging&rimming in jisung & felix’s if youre not into that<3

chan: alpha

your nose twitched when you inhaled at the front door. the smell of the beach, ocean breeze, warm and comforting filled your senses - it was so strong. changbin confirmed your suspicions when he opened the door. “it’s bad.”

“okay,” you nodded, making your way into the house. it was clean. weirdly clean, you thought. “who cleaned?”

“jisung. nerves, i don’t know. probably an omega thing.” you blinked, nodding, before you started to walk over to chan’s room. what you were met with was not an unpleasant sight.

chan, fully naked. his body was covered with a sheen of sweat, glistening off of his abdominal muscles and his pecs. you wanted to lick it up. his hand was pumping steadily at his cock, a pool of cum already on his tummy - but he wasn’t stopping. you could see his knot, engorged and wanting to pop. it obviously had nothing to pop in yet, but you were there now, his loyal omega girlfriend.

his head snapped to the door when you entered, even though you’d tried to open and shut the door quietly. he looked about two seconds away from growling, but instead, he just clenched the base of his cock sharply.

“fuck, baby. get over here. i’m gonna cum and i need to pop my knot inside that pussy,” he grumbled, a low gravelly tone. the sweat had mussed his hair so it was curly, dark against his forehead. you nodded, shocked, before quickly shucking off your clothes and getting onto the bed. always considerate, he flipped you over, wrapping your legs around his waist so it wasn’t uncomfortable when you were locked together. without a second passing, he pushed inside of you.

“oh, channie, that’s big,” you crooned, head falling back against the pillows. chan was quick to start fucking into you, a feverish pace that set your senses on fire. omega slick was a blessing at that point - honestly, you’d been slicking up since you smelled him by the door. he needed help more than you did though. “alpha! oh, god, daddy, are you gonna fuck a pup into me?”

chan groaned, his sweaty forehead resting against yours. his eyes were clenched shut but he managed to nod, breaths fanning over your mouth. “yeah, omega. ‘m gonna- f- fuck, i’m gonna cum, gonna fill you up, fuck. you gotta cum too, you gotta-“

“baby, focus on you for now, okay?” chan looked hesitant but nodded anyway, his pace becoming stuttered as he got closer to the edge.

“o-okay, but then i gotta eat you out when my knot breaks.”

“deal.”

minho: alpha

you squeaked when you opened your front door. your boyfriend was standing there, hair messy and chest heaving from his panting. the smell of chocolate was so, so thick, almost sickly, and he was staring at you with dark eyes.

oh. he’s in rut.

“oh. oh, baby, did you run here?” you asked, eyes soft as you rake over his body. not only were you concerned that he ran all the way to your house, you were also concerned that he ran all the way to your house with a massive bulge in his trousers from his erection.

“i… i need you,” he admitted, eyes falling to the floor. “i’m sorry. me coming here must have surprised you, but i’m in rut. and i know we said we should do it separately, just for a while, but i-“

“get in, dumbass,” you quipped, yanking him in by his wrist. he’s in shorts and a t-shirt, which should’ve been the first clue. it was autumn, and he was running very hot by the feeling of his bare skin in your hand. “fuck me. it’ll make you feel better, and i’m your girlfriend, min. it’s really okay.”

“but i might-“

“ssh,” you kissed his lips, and he sighed. “i don’t care if you get a little crazy. bite me, claim me. i’m in this for the long run.”

that’s how you ended up on all fours on the floor of your living room, only a pillow underneath your knees for comfort. minho was pounding into you, having already knotted you once he clearly needed more. you pushed your ass onto him, bouncing against his cock.

“that’s it, little omega,” he groans, both hands slapping your asscheeks. “fuck back on my cock like that. gonna knot you again, fill you up, make you a mommy.”

“oh, yes,” you whined, head falling to the floor. “make me a mommy, min, breed me, fuck-“

“i’m gonna make you a fucking mommy, filthy girl. gonna give you pups, yeah?”

jisung: omega

“i wan’ the big one,” jisung whined, making grabby hands at you. you were picking which knotting dildo to strap to yourself and fuck him with, and of course, your cute little in-heat boyfriend wanted the huge one. you couldn’t even take this one on a good day, but jisung had been fingered open by both himself and you and so you shrugged, strapping it onto your harness. when you got back on the bed, he’d contortioned himself onto his back with his legs held up by his hands. he looked at you with teary eyes, yet still a big, stupid grin on his face. “mm, yeah, mommy. gimme your big cock.”

“slut,” you mused, affectionately dragging your hand up his thigh. you used his own slick to glide up the strapon, before you were pressing it into his hole. his jaw dropped immediately, letting you stretch him nice and wide. his eyes were now fond, affectionate as he let you pick your own pace. you, of course, chose slow and deep. “look at your hole, taking all of this. ‘s so cute, hannie.”

“big, big, oh- oh, mommy, breed me,” he blurted, head falling back against the pillows. his cock was leaky, dripping out onto his stomach from beneath his foreskin and his balls looking tight and full. you squeezed one in your hand experimentally, and his back arched, a choked moan falling out from his lips. “mommy!”

“you want mommy to breed you, baby?” you hummed, kissing his pouty lips. he moaned into the kiss, nodding eagerly and making the kiss way more sloppy than intended. “should mommy go faster? gotta make her omega cum before i fill him up, right?”

“oh! oh, yes, mommy! please, faster, faster-“

“alright, slut. i got you,” you giggled, before you started to pick up the pace. his eyes rolled back into his head feeling you drill into his prostate, and he let out a loud moan that reverberated off the walls. everything in the room smelled of citrus.

“love you, mommy,” he mumbled, lost in ecstasy. you smiled, pecking his nose. “always helpin’ me with my heat.”

“love you too, baby.”

felix: omega

“ah, shit! that’s it,” felix whined, his head lolling over the end of the sofa. your tongue swept up the slick on his asshole, just delving in slightly before sloppily kissing down to his balls. felix groaned a deep noise when you licked over his balls, his thighs clenching. honestly, omega slick didn’t do much for you since you were an omega too, but you could still taste felix’s signature cinnamon sent in it.

you licked your lips when you pulled away, rubbing a thumb over his tight hole. “you want more, lixie?”

“yes! yes, fingers, and then- i want the toy after, please, please,” he was babbling, hips grinding down into the leather of the sofa. you giggled, before you slid two fingers into him at once, curling against his prostate. he jolted, a sharp inhale of breath being heard around the room. “mm, mm, c’mere, got an idea.”

you shifted over to let him pull you underneath him, your fingers still deep in his ass. with a quick move he was sliding your underwear down and positioning his cock at your entrance.

“lixie…?”

“‘s- i gotta. i can fucking smell you, and i have to. keep fingering me, precious,” he breached your hole in one go. you were honestly almost as wet as him just from getting your tongue and fingers on him, and the stretch was a welcome one. “ah- ah, yeah, shit. n-needed that.”

when he started to move his hips, he quickly noticed that he was riding your fingers as well as fucking into you. your whines joined the room along with his deep groans. he was feeling just so good, so full, so content.

jeongin: alpha

jeongin had only had a few ruts alone before you, and there he was - fucking into you without abandon while seungmin was literally in the next room. he didn’t even seem to care.

“‘s- oh, gotta- just a bit deeper, i gotta get it deeper so it takes, y’know?” jeongin was whiny and talkative during a rut, you noticed. you obeyed his wishes anyway, pulling your legs up to your chest and letting him fuck into you deeper this time. the sensation had your eyes rolling back into your head, but you still had enough wits about you to tease him.

“for what to take, alpha?” you croon. jeongin groans, his hand splayed next to your head. the bed itself was rocking, headboard crashing against the wall with a loud noise every single thrust. it had you whining even louder, just the thought of being caught. you knew jeongin got off on it too.

“for- for my pups to take, baby, shit- ‘m gonna knot you again,” jeongin admitted, and then he was laughing in disbelief. you giggled too, shaking your head fondly and brushing the hair back from his eyes. you didn’t miss him leaning his head into your touch.

“c’mon then, innie. breed your omega. i’ve been good, haven’t i?”

[rose-reveries]

⚠️BEWARE THE EPISODE 4 PJO SPOILERS⚠️

Episode 4: The things I like, the things I don’t, the things I miss but I’m okay with them not being there

The things I liked about the new episode:

I liked the conversation at the beginning in the train. Very reminiscent of the book where we get to learn a little bit more about Annabeth and how she arrived at camp. I found it interesting how here we changed it from Annabeth’s father always resenting her birth to Annabeth’s father considering her “a gift” until her step-mother came along. I don’t mind this change at all and all in all still makes sense as to why Annabeth ran away when she was 7.

“But at least with gods you know the rules” okay Miss Chase your autism is showing (/j)

The flow from seeing the centaurs (which is something I believe only Percy saw in the books) to letting this be how Grover opens up about Pan and why he wants to be a searcher was a nice little combination of scenes to save time. We still understand how Grover feels about humans and their mistreatment of nature but it’s just in a slightly different way than the books and I’m okay with that change.

The BANTER between the trio was SO good this episode. You can really feel the bonds between these characters (especially Percy and Annabeth) forming this episode.

The pacing in this episode finally started to feel a little bit better than the first 3 episodes. I actually do think the change in how they meet Echidna helps with this because it prolongs the hunt whereas in the book the Echidna and Chimera scene IS quite short and fast. Meeting Echidna on the train, having them run and try to heal Percy, Percy gets worse, Percy sacrifices himself to let the other two get away, fight scene, he falls into the river, etc. Just way better pacing than like, for example, episode one where Alecto literally just flies at him and without moving he stabs her and she dies 💀

Okay, my FAVORITE new thing about the episode does have to be making the Arch a temple to Athena. If the gods still rule but have adapted to the west it makes total sense that they still have temples but they’re just modern American landmarks. Super cool and I loved this change.

Also, rather than Annabeth and Grover just heading down in the elevator before learning there’s a monster, I do like Percy stepping in and sacrificing himself to let them get away. It shows his loyalty to his friends, and how he would rather fight a monster than let them die without reason.

Since the Arch is a temple and Athena had to give Echidna permission to enter, and she did so due to Annabeth’s impertinence, this REALLY helps with the shows current message of heroes and monsters and what those terms mean, but also just how the gods are like BAD. I think it’ll help make Luke’s reasoning for turning on the gods make SO much sense for new audience members.

Percy and Annabeth banter?? ADORABLE

TOTALLY CALLED THE WATER REACHING OUT TO REACH PERCY LMAO. I know RR said he had Percy jump into the river because he didn’t realize how far it was from the arch so this is like sort of a retcon but yea, it works. Percy can manipulate water we learned this with how he pushed Nancy into the fountain.

Things I didn’t:

I think Echidna breaking into the train ✨magically✨ was eh. She could have simply just been on the train like how in the book she was just simply in the elevator.

Speaking of Echidna, it would’ve been so cool to see a snake lady :’). They did it with Medusa and Alecto but I guess they spent their whole budget on that because no snake lady to be seen.

I know the Mist would be hiding it from mortals… but even in the book Grover is like wearing pants and a hat. If they spent less cgi on Grover they could’ve animated some other stuff I’m sure.

The choice to keep depicting Kronos as this wraith instead of a voice from a pit is interesting?? We are already not setting up for Kronos reveal (like there was no Kronos exposition in the museum in episode one which I though was weird). Also I’d say that they’re doing this because they want new audience members to believe Hades is the BBG or something, but if they wanted us to think that why not mention the Helm of Darkness? The Helm would definitely help allude to this wraith figure we see I think. Or show us the hellhound. I don’t know. Weird. I think there is a lot of missing information that is IMPORTANT to the story that shouldn’t have been left out.

Things I miss but it’s fine they’re not there

The trio just never lost their stuff, huh? Like…the bus didn’t explode. They didn’t have to return a poodle for money to a train to Denver. I understand this was all probably cut for time and money sake.

Wish we took the time in the arch for Annabeth to talk about wanting to be an architect.

In conclusion, I liked this episode and I am enjoying the series. But this means that the Lightning Thief Musical is still the most book accurate adaptation of Percy Jackson and that makes me lol

[maybeitsalivescribbles]

I wondered what would happen if heroes were stuck in a town without villains, and this is the result:

The Fakers

At the Hero Agency, the open space was silent. The clock alone was ticking the seconds away, although they seemed more like minutes for the three heroes inside. Only their suits added a touch of color in the gray room. It was a sunny day, but their expressions were as stern as their office. Settled behind their laptops, they frowned, scrolling furiously and refreshing the live news stream. Sometimes, they asked each other:

“Do you have something? Anything?”

Since they all checked the same sites, the answer was always negative. They couldn’t help, though. They kept asking. Suddenly, Hero 1 yelled:

“Hey, come and see this!”

The others jumped out of their seats, rushing to them:

“Something new?”

“A robbery?”

“A kidnapping?”

“A storm coming?”

“No! A cat video!”

Well, it was better than nothing. Everyone pressed around the screen to see the kittens. One minute and a half of glorious amazement later, they all turned back to their places, sharing embarrassed smiles.

During the next hour, a phone rang in Hero 2's pocket. They weren’t allowed to answer them in the office, but it was a long time that didn’t matter anymore. Without showing it, the others listened rapturously to every laconic answer Hero 2 made. After she hanged up, another asked innocuously:

“Everything’s all right?”

She raised her head as if it weighted too much for her neck:

“Hmm? Yes, yes. That was my sister Superhero, from the capital. She just fought Villain in hand-to-hand combat. She’s fine.”

“Oh. That’s good, then.”

“Sure.”

There was a tense silence. Everyone went back to their computers, and jumped when she hit the table with her fist:

“Damn it, why am I stuck in this office? I’m a goddamn loser!”

The other heroes glanced at each other nervously and didn’t answer, but she wasn’t finished:

“I can fight Villains just as well as her! I went to the same academy! I trained just as hard!”

Hero 3 tried to defuse the situation:

“We know, Hero 2. You fought so well during Supervillain’s attack-”

“That was two years ago!”

“Because...err..because we made such a good job Villains are scared to come here now?”

“No, damn it! It’s because that city is so bloody little no one is interested in taking it over! No building to explode, no rich people to kidnap, and I bet the bank only has pocket change! Nobody cares about us!”

No one replied. She was right and they all knew it.

“That’s not that bad,” tried to plead Hero 1. “I mean, if we were in the capital, we would see catastrophes and dead people every day. Isn’t this a reasonable price for peace? I-”

Hero 2 turned to face them, roaring:

“What about the money, Hero 1? What about the fucking money? We don’t find a villain to fight, the agency will cut our salary completely, and the health insurance. Do you have another safe job in mind, in this economy? I think not!”

Hero 1's gaze snapped to the floor.

“She’s right,” said Hero 3 in his soft, low, sad voice. “My daughter will get to college next year. I don’t know how to tell her that I might not have the money.”

“We’re screwed, aren’t we?” asked Hero 1 mournfully.

“If we keep wallowing, yes,” riposted Hero 2, knotting her fingers together. “But the academy has taught us not to give into despair. There must be something we can do.”

“No, not we, that’s the problem,” interjected Hero 3. “We just – we need a villain.”

“You have a list, Hero 1, don’t you?”

“Yes. I know who are the closest to us, and what crimes they have done. But you don’t suggest-”

Hero 2 stood up and paced the room, stopping just to look at them:

“I’m just saying! We’re out of options. Not all Villains do a lot of damage. If we set a trap for one to come here, it’ll be a good action, right? We’d be stopping them. That’s our job. We catch one, we make them promise to stay in town and not to hurt citizens, we let them go, rinse and repeat.”

The two others exchanged a glance. Hero 1 bit their lip, but as they were about to talk, Hero 3 shook his head:

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. We don’t know the harm we can bring into the city.”

“Think about your daughter!”

“Lots of people here have a daughter. I couldn’t sleep at night if I hurt one of them. I’ve not become a hero to do this.”

He crossed his arms, on the defensive. Hero 2 stepped towards him, with a pleading smile:

“At least let’s take a look at them. Just a little peek at the list. We have to inform ourselves anyway.”

Hero 3 grimaced, but he went along when the two others came to see the list on Hero 1's computer.

“Oh, look at this gal! Only specialized in robberies, lives only 50 km from here.”

“Nah, read ahead,” protested Hero 3. She killed one hostage once.”

“Okay, fine,” sighed Hero 2. “What about this guy? He didn’t do much. Just kidnapped the mayor of his town once. I mean, who can blame him ? The man is nasty.”

“Yeah, but after that he kidnapped his eight-year-old boy to make a point. Pass.”

“If you nitpick like that, we’ll never find anyone!”

“You call this nitpicking? Anyway, what would you do to make them come here? Write a letter? “Dear Villain, come to wreck shit in our town so we can be paid, please don’t denounce us, signed Very amoral heroes?” That doesn’t make sense!”

“Do you have a better idea?”

Hero 3 hesitated.

“Maybe we should write a letter to the agency,” he proposed. If our job is done, maybe they’ll relocate us to a bigger town.”

“Do you know the rent there?”

“Maybe we can replace heroes who were wounded or something to begin with.”

Hero 1, who played with their pen during their conversation, suddenly threw it in the air with an exclamation of triumph. The pen hit Hero’s 2 shoulder, who yelped indignantly and encased it in ice with a snap of her fingers.

“I’ve got it!” yelled Hero 1, turning towards their colleagues with a huge grin. “Replace, that’s it!”

Opening a file which contained their schedules, they pointed at the others, adding:

“Heroes, meet our villains!”

Hero 2 and 3 looked at their finger designating them and exchanged a glance.

“You mean... we turn evil?”

“Listen to me. We can’t trust Villains to do the right evil thing. But we do, right? We know this town. We never patrol at the same time. While one of us do the heroing, another pretends to be a new villain in town. We train between each other, so we’ll have no problem fighting for show.”

The room fell into a brief, stunned silence.

“Can we do it?” wondered Hero 2, griping her elbows. “I mean, we’re heroes. Do we have what it takes?”

“I’m sure we can be whatever we want to be, replied Hero 1 reassuringly. Look at your willingness to throw away citizens' safety for yourself! That was very evil.”

Hero 2 blushed:

“Aw, you only say that.”

“I mean it! You’d be perfectly vicious!”

“My, that- that means a lot. You too, you’d be a really good evil mastermind.”

“Aw, thanks. And Hero 3 here was ready to destroy our plans at every turn! Just like a villain. Plus, at the last break, he ate the next doughnut.”

“I didn’t mean it!” he gasped, turning red.

They all looked expectantly at him.

“Nobody is coming to rescue us,” slowly said Hero 2, smirking. “Sometimes you have to be your own Villain.”

Hero 3 sighed and crossed his arms:

“I can sew,” he mumbled. “I’ll make us new costumes.”

*

Back to the Hero x Villain Masterlist.

[donnabenevientosimpingzone]

Hey! Now that you’re back I wanted to ask about Resident Lover? I remember you were on the team- but then the game came out and your name wasn’t on the dev list... what happened?

I can’t escape this question can I- and for those of you who messaged me, I did delete them in hopes of avoiding this- but I don’t want rumours to spread so lemme be transparent.

Also pls read this for how I’m handling coming back to this blog: https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/741337986608873472/complex-feelings-and-absolute-pandemonium-about-my

No, I wasn’t kicked off the team, nor was I invited back when I left- and they made the right choice doing that. I was not mentally stable. I didn’t take the project seriously, I had jealousy issues, and didn’t take criticism well- I self destructed badly- blew up and burned that bridge to ashes, not to mention what sorta hurt I caused the team.

It did hurt a lot when I saw the game release. I was so upset, and spent so many weeks thinking about “what if I didn’t fuck up”. But there are no “what ifs” in history, we are meant to go through what we do in order to become the best versions of ourselves. The whole ordeal was part of the last push I needed to finally seek professional help. And the fact it still hurts whenever I see it around means I still care and carry guilt about everything that happened.

I’m practicing exposure therapy to try and heal that gaping wound. RE8 has turned my life completely on its head and I don’t want to abandon it- the best outcome will be the day I can download and play the game and find it within myself to genuinely love it with no more wounds to lick- but for now I’m content with seeing it float around every once in a while on my dash.

Out of respect- I hope none of you will pester the devs about this either. They did something amazing, and I’m so proud of what they’ve accomplished. Out of all of them I really miss MJ. They were the best, most hilarious friend- I always thought they were super attractive- and the whole reason the game was possible. Show them some love- idk message them “you’re cool!” for me or something. Anon ask if you have to. Don’t tell them I’m the one who sent you- I think it’ll be funny to just have a whole buncha people messaging them outta nowhere bahaha

And with that I hope this clears it up and stops people from messaging anymore about it. It’s still a sensitive wound I’m working to heal and I’d like to do it at my own pace<3 I don’t regret the experience, I’m in such a better place now because of it. I would love to make peace with my past self and accept the pain as a part of growing.

Until then enjoy me going back to my usual shenanigans before all the shit hit the fan. I’m very excited to draw more Spider Donna and Beneviento Sisters, I hope y’all enjoy it too<3

Update edit: https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/737803172475781120/stupid-lil-update-i-wanna-do-as-per-my-pinned

Update! https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/737980137572892672/people-who-knowknew-me-personally-probably-arent

Update that shows old sprite: https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/738487941680316416/want-me-as-a-professor-okay-damn-ignore-the

Update where I rant about Angie and Daniela with a cat: https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/740499151828156416/can-we-see-the-png-of-the-angie-sprite-holding-a

Update about the dangie ask on the RL blog: https://www.tumblr.com/donnabenevientosimpingzone/742312364040454144/hey-just-a-heads-up-that-the-rl-team-recently

[urfavstargirl1]

the darkest night - part 3 of 3

part 1 - part 2

summary: best friends-to-lovers!Y/N waits by his side for Post-Vecna Eddie to wake up from a coma. After months, her beloved metal head is back to earth with a serious proposition for the girl he loves most

cw: st4 post-Vecna but Eddie lives, hospitals, Eddie is in a coma, best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, angst, kissing, trauma, cursing, etc.,

word count: 5k

April 7th, 1986

“Where is he,” you mutter under your breath, pacing rapidly beneath the fluorescent lights of the hospital hallway.

You read out the hospital room numbers as you pass them.

303, 305, 307, 309.

As you approach room 315, you see a group of people waiting outside. There’s a guy around your age you don’t recognize with two boys that you do recognize as some of the freshman Eddie took under his wing this year. 

“Dustin,” You croak. The boy Eddie talked about the most.

As soon as he sees you, he comes rushing toward you. You engulf him in a hug and he squeezes you tightly.

You silently hold each other like that for a while before you pull away and forcibly smile at him.

“I came as soon as I could,” you said. 

Dustin nodded.

“All flights to Hawkins have been canceled. It cost an arm and a leg to travel back here, but as soon as I heard the news, I…”

“I know,” Dustin said as he put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed. 

“How’s he holding up? How’re you all holding up,” you ask as you look between the boys.

Dustin took in a deep breath, “He’s not doing too well. We’re - not that much better.”

You nod and bring Dustin in for another hug, “I’m so sorry.”

Dustin hugs you back and you stroke the curls on his head. 

When you pull away, Dustin gives you a look. “You should see him.”

You look at him warily. Of course you want to see your best friend after an interdimensional monster attack, but at this moment, you realize that you might not be ready to see the horrors that have truly happened.

“I think if he heard your voice, he might finally wake up.”

You press your lips together. You have to be strong. If not for you then for Eddie and his friends. You nod and let Dustin guide you into the room.

You see Wayne sitting in a chair next to the hospital bed with his head hanging down. When he hears your footsteps he looks up at you and a tired smile forms on his features.

“Y/N,” he says with a slight cough. He rises from his chair. “Long time no see darlin’.”

You wave him off as you walk towards him, “Oh, it’s just me, no need to get up.”

“It’ll help to stretch the legs,” he smiles.

As you approach him, he opens his arms and you greet him with a hug. He holds onto you more tightly than you expected and you know it must be bad.

When he pulls away, you smile weakly. “How’s he doing?”

Wayne sighs and runs a hand over his head, “Oh well, you know the boy, never not doing anything that won’t give me a heart attack.”

You manage to let out a laugh, “Yeah, that’s Eddie for you.”

“He missed you something fierce. Was counting down the days till you’d come back from your spring break trip.”

Your lip quivers and you press them together to keep from shaking even more. “I never should have left.”

“No, don’t say that darlin’. You couldn’t have known what would happen.”

And how could you? How could you have known that an innocent trip to visit a high school friend in Boston planned months in advance would happen at the same time that your best friend would become wanted for a crime he didn’t commit and get sent into a coma from some weird monster bats in an alternate dimension that apparently exists right underneath your hometown of Hawkins, IN?

You take a moment to catch up with Wayne before he excuses himself to go take a walk and give you some space to be with Eddie.

When he leaves, you sit in the chair next to the bed and look at the boy lying before you.

He’s unrecognizable. 

He lies there, skin a ghost white. His curly brown hair is the only things standing out from the drab white walls and white hospital bed linens. 

His eyes are closed and there’s an oxygen tube draped across the middle of his face. An IV is inserted in the veins of his wrist. A heart monitor beeps incessantly from the other side of the bed.

You sniffle and lean forward to grab his hand. You look at his face now covered in red splotches you can only identify as what are probably bat bites.

“Hey Eddie,” you whisper, smiling despite his condition. You can’t help smiling whenever you’re around Eddie. Even if he’s not conscious.

You bring a hand forward and push the bangs hanging over his forehead back. You caress the skin and let your fingers trail to the side of his face. 

“I leave you for one week and look at all the trouble you got into,” you scold him. “I don’t think I can ever leave Hawkins in good conscience after this. There goes the trip to Europe I’ve always dreamed of.”

Eddie’s body lies still and his eyes remain shut. The only sign of life is the heart monitor still beeping.

You run your fingers along his arm and it isn’t cold, just still. You lean forward and place a soft kiss to his skin.

“I miss you Eds,” you whisper. “Please wake up soon.”

You almost want to say something else, anything else, but you can’t. You can’t say anything without wanting to cry. 

Eddie would hate to see you like this. He wouldn’t ever want you to shed a tear, least of all not like that. 

The thought alone makes you miss him even more. You’re never leaving his side again. 

You sit with Eddie like that for a while. If there’s ever anything that comes to mind that you want to say, you tell him. You hold his hand and talk to him as if he’s awake to hear it, hoping the sound of your voice really could wake him up.

After some time has passed, Wayne comes back to the room. You thank him for letting you see Eddie and promise to be back the next day. 

Before you leave, you see Dustin and the other boys are still there. And it looks like they went and got some food. Dustin hands you two bags, asking if you could give one to Wayne. 

“Why don’t you go and give it to him,” you say with the affection of a big sister.

Dustin shakes his head, “I don’t think I can.”

You jerk your head back slightly, “Oh, why not?”

“I don’t think I’m ready - to see him.”

“You mean you haven’t seen Eddie?”

Dustin meekly shakes his head. 

You look at him, wanting to know why, but can tell he probably won’t be up for explaining why. 

The look on your face must convey your thoughts because Dustin looks at you and whispers, “I was there when it happened. I saw him. I saw it all. To this day, I still see it. I can’t stop seeing it.”

You look at Dustin and frown feeling an ache deep inside your chest. You engulf him in what has to be the fifth hug since you got here. But what else can you do? 

There’s nothing you can say that will make the situation better. It’s bad enough you were gone when it all went down. You hope as much conveys in the warm embrace as you gently stroke the curls atop his head.

“I’m sorry Dustin,” you say as you pull apart. You cup his cheek and add, “For what it’s worth, I think Eddie would like to hear your voice too, whenever you’re ready.”

Dustin meekly smiles and nods. A moment of comfortable silence passes between you and the rest of the boys. When it passes, Dustin reintroduces you to Mike and introduces you to Steve.

You recognize him from school. Even though he was in the grade below you, you vaguely remember seeing him and his infamous head of hair roaming the halls.

You converse with the boys and soon, the events of the evening turn into a daily ritual.

Every day for almost a month, you come to the hospital to visit Eddie and spend time with his friends and Uncle Wayne. Some days it’s your turn to bring food or card games for the group. Other days it’s someone else's turn. 

You’ve also fallen into the habit of bringing Eddie things. One day, you brought the cassette to Judas Priest's new album Turbo. You knew it came out just before you had left but you didn’t know if Eddie had gotten to listen to it, so you bought the tape and your portable radio and listened to it for the first time with him.

For a moment, you could swear you saw a twitch in his lip, but just as soon as it happened, it went away and nothing like that happened again, but it felt promising enough.

You told Dustin about it and felt triumphant when you saw his eyes light up about it. For a moment, he thought he wanted to, and you encouraged him to, but as soon as he put his hand on the doorknob and looked through the little window on the door and saw the lower half of Eddie’s still body covered in a thin white blanket he froze.

“I-I can’t,” he muttered.

You placed a hand on his shoulder, “It’s okay. Don’t force yourself. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. Eddie would understand.”

As each day passed on, you thought it would be harder to see Eddie like this, but it wasn’t. After a while, you almost got sort of used to it. The hardest part about it all was seeing the toll it was taking on his loved ones. 

You tell Uncle Wayne was trying to keep a brave face, but you noticed the look on his face whenever the nurses spoke in hushed whispers about the wanted boy. 

And you definitely noticed the weariness and fatigue take over the faces of his friends who came by to see him every day.

You wanted to be strong for them all. For him. But deep down, you were scared. You feared he might never wake up. 

Your fear ran so deep, it even had you turning to church, a place you hadn’t been in years, but by god you needed a miracle. Eddie deserved a miracle. 

Every day as you trekked to the hospital, you would stop by the hospital chapel and pray for Eddie’s recovery before making it up to his room. 

The days all seemed to blend into one another and before you knew it, it had been two months since the tragic accident.

Deep down, you were growing frustrated and helpless.

“Goddamnit Eddie if you don’t wake up soon, I’m gonna kick your ass,” you had muttered next to his bed one night when no one was around. You could almost hear his laugh and that’s when you knew this whole thing had been going on so long your mind was beginning to play tricks on you, but what else could you do? 

This is just how things between you and Eddie are. You’d stick by his side every day for a hundred years.

By the time June rolled around, the hospital became a sweet relief from the sweltering heat outside.

Midnight snacks with the gang turned to ice cream runs and milkshake pickups. And now that most tv shows have ended their seasons and the tv program was taking a break for the summer, you were running out of things to update Eddie on.

To fill the silence, you decided to read him the Lord of the Rings books he loved so much. Despite being his best friend, you’d never really taken a liking to them and didn’t get around to reading them, but you supposed now was as good a time as any.

And pretty soon, you had someone to help you.

“Hey Eddie, guess who’s here,” you said cheerfully as you walked Dustin into the room cautiously, making sure to keep your arm comfortingly wrapped around the young boy.

“It’s your favorite little prodigy, Dustin,” you cooed as you smiled at Dustin. Dustin looked blankly at Eddie’s body lying on the hospital bed.

“Hey,” Mike whined. Steve nudged him and shook his head. The boys followed you and Dustin as you neared Eddie’s bed.

“H-Hey man, it’s me. Your little shrimp? Henderson?” Dustin weakly said.

You gently squeeze his arm, encouraging him a bit.

“You’re doing great,” Steve said as he clapped a hand to Dustin’s back. Dustin nodded and sat down in the chair next to Eddie.

He stared at him for a moment. Much of the scar tissue in his skin had healed compared to the state you found him in months ago. But the evidence remained. Eddie was hurt bad.

“We can’t wait till the next campaign,” Dustin said in a much more normal tone than you had expected.

Dustin looked over to you, Mike, and Steve who all gave him a reassuring look or thumbs up.

Dustin began to read. At first, his voice would shake and a few tears had even slipped out, but the more he read, the more confident and comfortable he became. 

And for the rest of the week, it became second nature for Dustin to join you in spending time with Eddie.

Back in May, the doctors said his vitals looked good and that it was just a matter of time before he would wake up. But the Fourth of July was in two weeks and your birthday the week after that.

If somehow Eddie could wake up on your birthday, you would never ask for another birthday present ever again.

But when your birthday passed and Eddie still hadn’t woken up, you’d started losing hope again. 

It was almost August and time for the kids to go back to school but they weren’t ready. They weren’t ready to say goodbye. 

Even though they would still visit Eddie, it would be harder to go every single day with homework and sports.

Hellfire club wouldn’t be the same. But it had to go on. Someone had to carry out Eddie’s legacy.

By the time September rolled around, the temperatures started getting lower and the leaves on the trees were starting to change colors. 

Part of you didn’t know how much longer you could take, but a bigger part of you knew you had to be there for Eddie. You loved him too much not to.

When Iron Maiden and Megadeth’s new albums came out, you bought the tapes and listened to it with Eddie along with a few other mixtapes you had made. 

You could have sworn you’d seen his finger ever so slightly tap, but you knew it was probably just all in your head. 

You didn’t understand, but you knew something had to be going on for Eddie to keep kicking as long as he has and that started to recover any hope you had lost.

You kept praying and visiting Eddie and doing it all over the next day.

By now, all the nurses knew you as the very sweet and dedicated girlfriend to the boy in the coma. It wasn’t your favorite label for Eddie but better than freak or any other crude thing some of the people in this town would call him.

It somehow always sort of broke your heart to hear them call you his girlfriend. You barely had the chance to be before this all happened. What you wouldn’t give to be his proper girlfriend when he does wake up.

On a cold and rainy October day, after begging the hospital staff to put a TV in his room and them finally granting your request, you brought a few VHS tapes of his favorite horror movies. Halloween, Eddie’s favorite holiday, was only two weeks away and he deserved to celebrate. 

It was your day off from work, and there was no better way to spend it than with a movie marathon with your favorite boy. 

It was a Thursday night and you had just finished Nightmare on Elm Street 2. The rain relentlessly pelted against the hospital room windows. You walked over to close the blinds when a clap of thunder and flash of lightning bright enough to light the room through the window struck. The unexpected sight and sound made you jump, letting out a small shriek. 

You clutched the fabric of your shirt over your chest and let out a shaky breath. You were glad no one else was in the room or else you probably would have startled them. 

You close the blinds shut and turn around to take your seat when you see Eddie’s eyelids flutter before slowly opening.

You were frozen in place, not sure if your eyes were deceiving you. 

“Eddie,” you called out in a voice barely above a whisper. 

Eddie’s eyes were now fully opened as he stared at the television in front of him.

“Eddie,” you called out a bit louder this time as you took a cautious step forward. 

The rest of Eddie’s body remained still, but his head slowly turned to your direction. He slowly looked up at you and a weak smile formed across his lips.

“Hey,” he croaked.

“Eddie,” you exclaimed as you rushed by his side.

You gazed into his eyes lovingly. His beautiful big brown eyes. Ones you feared you would never get to look into again. 

You could just kiss him and hug him and tell him everything, but all you can do is grab his face in your hands and inspect his wide open eyes, tired but full of life.

“Nurse,” you cry out. When no one arrives, you run to the hall and find Eddie’s nurse on her way over.

A few of the other nurses come in and start attending to Eddie. They swarm around him like diligent worker bees. 

One of them asks you to wait in the hall while they take his vitals and perform a few other tasks to assess his health, so you take the opportunity to call everyone and tell them that after months of waiting in agony, Eddie has finally woken up.

You don’t expect many people to show up, given that it’s past midnight on a weekday, but sure enough, Wayne, Dustin, Steve, Mike, and a few of Eddie’s other friends all show up.

The nurses instruct them all to enter two at a time or else all the excitement will tire Eddie out. 

Wayne was the first to show up. He got off his shift as soon as he could. But as the other kids arrived, he let them have their time.

He spent the rest of the evening with you in the hall crying tears of joy and rejoicing at the fact that Eddie was alive and awake again.

After all these months, your prayer has finally been answered. 

After the chaos of the night unfolded, Steve took the kids home so they could get ready for school in the morning leaving you and Wayne in Eddie’s hospital room.

Once the boys had left, it seems the excitement did tire Eddie out as he was on the verge of sleep.

“Why don’t you go on home and get some shut eye,” Wayne offered. 

As much as you wanted to stay with Eddie, you had to admit, you were exhausted, and you knew it’d be best to let Wayne have some time alone with his nephew.

So you went home and slept for hours. You didn’t even know what day or time it was when you woke up, but all you knew was that you had to see Eddie.

For the next couple of days, you continued your daily hospital visit routine. Despite finally having reached the point of consciousness, Eddie’s recovery continued to prove rather slow. He was still very weak and often barely able to speak at all. But you could tell he was listening. The ghost of a smile on his lips or gentle tap of a finger on your hand let you know he was almost there. 

Each day had its own little victory. And over the course of a few weeks, Eddie had started improving significantly. He could eat solid food, reach out for his own cup of water, hold up his worn copy of Lord of the Rings, and even carry a conversation.

You knew he was recovering well when he finally had the energy to pester Dustin and his other friends whenever they came around. Laughing so hard it hurt him.

“You okay,” Dustin asked.

“Yeah man, just hurts so good,” he’d joked.

The boy stuck around for a bit longer before Eddie sent them off on a journey to McDonald’s. You all had started getting hungry, but Eddie insisted they sneak him some fries because if the demo-bats didn’t kill him then the terrible hospital food probably would.

When you two were finally alone, you snuck a quick kiss to his cheek. If laughter was enough to have him aching, you were sure anything more than a chaste kiss would be lethal. And yet, you couldn’t help yourself.

“I think you missed a spot,” Eddie said, pointing to his lips.

“Did I now?” You teased as you held his hand.

“Yup, doctor's orders. I need 10 cc’s of kisses from you right this very second,” Eddie said as he moved over to the side closest to you and leaned forward with pouty lips and puppy dog eyes.

“Is that so? I don’t think that’s the right  prescription,” you teased as you leaned ever so slightly closer, challenging his pleading look.

“Leave that to the professionals, sweetheart. Don’t you want me to get better?” Eddie dramatically pleaded.

You leaned forward and quickly kissed his lips. You pulled away and rolled your eyes, “There, that better?”

“Nuh uh,” Eddie whined. In a husky seductive voice, he added, “Don’t you know baby? You’re my cure.”

“Oh god,” you cringed and laughed, “Okay, James Dean, does that line work on all the girls?”

“You tell me,” he challenged as he leaned forward, practically off the edge of his bed.

You rose from your seat and grinned at him. You pushed him back on his bed and said, “Alright Cassanova, don’t hurt yourself.”

Eddie made an incoherent noise that could only be described as a whine followed by a pout on his lips.

You leaned down, close enough to his face and locked eyes with him. They asked a question and you answered by leaning down and pressing your lips to his. 

He reached his arm up to cup your cheek and hold you by the back of your head as he deepened the kiss. You allowed him to take what he needed, knowing he deserved it after all the trouble he’d been through. And selfishly, you wanted him to.

But when you heard the heart rate monitor beeping increasing in volume and speed you pulled away and laughed, gently patting him on the left side of his chest.

“Okay, that’s enough for now. Don’t think the 10 cc’s will account for your heart exploding as a side effect,” you smiled.

Eddie laughed and put his hand over yours as you sat back down in your chair.

You smiled at him and could only thank god or the universe or whatever higher power brought the love of your life back to this earth to be with you.

“What are you thinking about,” Eddie asked.

“Nothing,” you shrugged despite feeling a warmth in your chest at the sight of the light in his eyes. “It’s good to see you like this.”

He grabbed your hand in his and squeezed tightly. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” you said as you brought your intertwined fingers and kissed the knuckles of his hand. 

“Wayne tells me you came here every day.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled, “We were both here. Usually he came during the day while I was at work and then I would come at night while he was at work so there was at least someone here with you.”

“I can’t believe you did that,” Eddie replied as he rubbed circles into the skin of your hand.

“What are you talking about?”

“I was out for months, baby. And you still came. I don’t know who else would do that.”

“Someone with no life,” you joked and Eddie rolled his eyes.

You sighed, “Some days were harder than others, but… but you can’t get rid of me that fast!”

Eddie chuckles and it felt good to hear him like that. You could spend the rest of your life trying to make that boy smile.

“Remember what I told you that night, back at the trailer?” Eddie asked after a moment of comfortable silence.

“Oh gee, yeah, that night. Out of the hundreds of nights we’ve spent together, yeah I remember that one,” you sarcastically respond, poking fun at his vague words.

“Shut up,” Eddie smirked and shook his head. “I’m talking about that night after Gareth’s party. With the truth or dare and you blowing chunks and–”

“Okay, okay, yes I remember now,” you squeezed Eddie’s hand bone crushingly tight.

Eddie laughs, “Do you remember what I said?”

“Kind of, that night was a bit of a blur.”

“Oh, my little lightweight,” Eddie coos as he rubs circles into your skin.

He breathes in and exhales. 

“You’re my northern star, you know that?” Eddie said offhandedly as he gazed down at your joined hands.

“What?” You ask in confusion.

“There’s been a lot of darkness in my life. Never seems to stop following me. But as long as you’re by my side, I can see the light. I can find my way back home.”

You looked at Eddie and squeezed his hand reassuringly. You looked at him, and saw a boy, who was much weaker and broken down than the boy you knew before this all happened. But compared to that dreaded April day, there was a light in his eyes and color in his skin and softness to his features. 

The boy you always loved and was always full of life never went away.

You leaned forward and gave Eddie a kiss. A dramatic, take your breath away kind of kiss to show him just how much you loved him and how much he meant to you.

When you pulled away, Eddie’s eyes had become glossy. 

“You know, for a long time, I think I just tried to run away from it all, but I always ended up running back to you and I don’t know if I ever want to stop.”

A soft tear rolled down his cheek and you kissed it away. “Shh, Eddie, it’s okay,” you softly said. 

You cupped his cheek as more tears began to fall. “I love you and believe me, and I never want you to stop either.”

And without fail, tears started falling down your own cheeks. 

You were grateful it was just you and Eddie in the room. You two could finally let go of all the stress and anxiety that had been building up over the past several months.

“Don’t you ever leave me like that again Munson,” you tried to joke as yours and Eddie’s faces were growing splotchy.

Eddie weakly laughed and leaned forward to give you a kiss.

“You know, I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, and it doesn’t have to happen now, or anytime soon really, but I think I’d like to have you by my side like this for a long time,” Eddie said as he pressed a kiss to your knuckles.

“How long are we talking about Munson?”

“Long enough to not be the only Munson between us two,” he said quietly before peering up into your eyes.

Your eyes widened at the implication of his words. “You mean that?”

Eddie nodded and smiled giddily. “Figured after everything you’ve done for me, the least I could do is give you a ring and my last name, maybe a little Munson or two to run around our future place with.”

You returned his smile and leaned forward to kiss him again, warmly and passionately. Eddie deepened the kiss and it took everything in you not to jump on the hospital bed with him and get a jump start on that plan.

“Oh Eddie, you don’t know the things I have planned for you when you get out of this hospital,” you sighed as you pulled away from him.

Before Eddie could reply, the boys returned from their McDonald’s adventure and Eddie practically jumped out of his hospital bed at the sight of his beloved french fries.

You two spent the rest of the night like that till the boys left to go home. The night nurse came in one last time to check on Eddie before going on her break. And once she left it was just you and Eddie alone again.

You smiled at him and let out a yawn.

“You tired, baby?”

“Little bit,” you nodded sleepily.

Eddie began scooting to the side of his hospital bed, “C’mere.”

You looked at him skeptically, unsure you would fit, but realized you didn’t even care. You wanted to be pressed to Eddie as closely as possible anyway.

You shuffled next to him and climbed under the blanket.

Eddie wrapped his arm around you and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Get some sleep, sweetheart.”

You sighed as you pressed your head to his chest and draped an arm over his stomach, “Goodnight Eddie.”

“G’night baby,” Eddie whispered as he caressed your hair and wrapped his other arm around you.

In the morning, Wayne walked into the room to find you and Eddie sound asleep, lying peacefully in each other's arms. 

You and Eddie, against the world.

[do-it-jakey-baby]

An Unlikely Encounter

Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Warnings: language, physical violence, mentions of agoraphobia (I think that’s it, sorry if there’s more!)

18+, MINORS DNI

TAGLIST: @torniturntomyarrow

Sorry, no smut in this one! But I promise there’s more juicy content around the corner. 😉

Chapter 3

3.6k word count

You froze solid as her words sunk in.

You’re trending.

Everyone thinks you’re Jake Kiszka’s new girlfriend.

Your world seemed to spin at a nauseating pace. You could hear your best friend still speaking to you on the other end of the phone but her words fizzled into the abyss. Your fingers frantically darted across the screen of your phone as you searched across social media, finding your face plastered across every site, every Greta Van Fleet hashtag. You were there in every nook, cranny and corner of the fandom. People were asking the same questions. Who is she? Does anyone know her? Where did she come from? Is she British? Is she Jake Kiszka’s girlfriend? Is she nice?

“Y/N!! Hello?!” You hear blaring from your outstretched palm.

“Katrina, what the fuck is happening?!” You babbled, barely fighting back the sob that was threatening to bubble up from your chest. All of the commotion had Jake running back into the room, his eyes wide and hands flailing.

“Y/N, what is it? Are you ok?”

You put your phone on speaker. “Kat, please, you tell him. I can’t think straight right now.”

“Uhh… ok, I’m guessing that’s Jake with you? Hi, Jake. I’m Katrina, Y/N’s best friend.”

“Hi, Katrina. Yeah, it’s Jake. What the fuck is going on?”

“You might want to see for yourself, my guess is if you check any of your social media accounts it’ll be there ready and waiting.”

Jake scoured the floor to find his jeans and retrieved his phone from the pocket. Unlocking the screen, he clicked into an app and sighed. He knew this all too well, anyone who got even remotely close to one of the band members was dissected by their fanbase almost instantaneously.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry, I should have known better before asking you to get in the picture with us earlier.”

You were still in a state of shock, going from a nobody to a somebody within the space of 24 hours was eating away at you. You’d never experienced anything like this before, you always faded into the crowd. You rarely received attention and you kinda liked it that way.

“What happens now?” You speak up, your voice meek and raspy.

“I’ll call the guys, but it’s not a big deal. Shit like this blows over, it’s not a controversy. Danny has a lot of female friends, he’s well versed in this.”

“Ok, in your world it might not be a big deal, but it is in mine. I am a nobody from a small town in South England, Jake. Now my face is all over the internet!” You throw yourself down onto the bed in frustration, hiding your face in the peaks of the duvet.

“If it helps, babe, most people are just commenting on how pretty you are.” Kat chimes in. You’d almost forgot she was still on the phone.

“I’ll leave you to it, but I want you to call me ASAP and fill me in. I want to know how the hell you managed to meet our favourite band. Sorry, Jake, but a girl needs the deets.”

“I understand. Well, hey, I’m sure we could arrange something so that you get to meet your favourite band too.” Jake chuckled.

“I’ll take that as payment for holding my best friend captive for the last 24 hours, Kiszka. Y/N, I’ll call tomorrow. Love you, bye.”

Jake sat beside you and placed a gentle hand on your back. You let out an exaggerated groan and lifted your face up to look at him.

“Make all of your accounts private, if they aren’t already. It’ll blow over, angel.”

He placed a soft kiss to your forehead and handed you the damp washcloth.

“Thank you, but I actually just think I’ll jump in the shower, if that’s ok?”

“Of course, angel. I’ll go warm it up for you.” He squeezed your thigh and moved to the bathroom. You heard him flip the water on, the sound of it splashing down onto the shower tray instantly soothing you. It was just what you needed, you longed to feel the steam on your face and wash away the stress you’d ensued over the complete bomb your best friend had dropped onto your life. Yeah, maybe you were overreacting, but the thought of your face being burnt into every fan’s memory was filling you with dread. You began to sweat again, pulling yourself back into a panic, but just as you started slipping Jake was there again. The comfort of his presence lulled you back into a feeling of security. He grounded you, and that was a difficult thing for anyone to do, let alone a man you’d known for a mere 48 hours. He took your hand and guided you off the bed, pressing it against the small of your back and drawing you in. His other hand manoeuvred to cup your jaw and he captured you in a kiss that was sweeter than honey. You were falling under his spell so quickly, you hadn’t even realised the extent yet.

“Mind if I join you?”

“I was hoping you’d ask.” You breathed, grasping at his hair as you pulled him back in for another kiss.

~

You and Jake spent the entire week together. You’d made passing comments about how you were intruding on his time with his band and should probably get going, but he was having none of it and always insisted you stayed. You couldn’t help the incessant intrusive thoughts from bouncing off every corner of your brain.

Why would he want to spend time with me?

Surely I’m just something to pass the time?

He’s going to get bored of me soon and move onto the next girl…

But each time, he silently proved you wrong. You’d never experienced intimacy like this. He was so attentive to your every need, always making sure you were comfortable, thinking about even the smallest of details. He had learnt so much about you and continuously surprised you with how much he absorbed. He knew your favourite bubble tea place that was tucked away secretly behind the bustling streets, and that your go-to was the honeydew melon milk tea (soy milk, you were lactose intolerant), light ice, semi-sweetness, with lychee popping bubbles. He knew you struggled in public and had previously battled with agoraphobia. He knew all the right places to touch you and could turn you into a whining, shaking mess at the snap of his fingers. He was unlike any other man you’d met before and any other man you’d ever meet again. The feelings that you felt after your week together were terrifying, because you knew he could disappear at the drop of a hat and all of the walls you’d meticulously built up over time would come crashing down around you, crushing you under the rubble and burying you alive. The unknown left you feeling nauseous with crippling anxiety. You liked control, craved it. If you were in control, the only person who could hurt you, was you. But here you were, your fragile heart entirely in the hands of another being.

On his last evening in London before they left for Dublin, Kat invited them over to her flat for dinner. You had joined her early to help her prep, your hands shaking as you chopped the tomatoes.

“Y/N, dude. Will you chill, please? I don’t fancy a trip to A&E tonight because you’ve severed your finger.” She rolls her eyes and places her hand on top of yours, signalling for you to put the knife down.

“But I want to help! You can’t do everything Katrina, even if you’d prefer that I wasn’t in your way.” You giggle at her, picking the tea towel up off the side to wipe your hands.

“Yeah you’re right, get the fuck out of my kitchen before you burn the place down.” She winks. You ball the tea towel up in your hands and throw it at her, it landing on her head, draping over her face.

“You have 3 seconds to get out of my sight before I kick your ass.”

“Ok, ok. I’ll go and get ready. Call me if you need me.”

“I won’t!”

You walk away, chuckling to yourself. You loved your friendship with Kat. She was more like your sister than your best friend, the only person who was a constant in your life, and she held a special place in your heart. There wasn’t much room in there for anyone else, you’d closed yourself off from the world long ago. Too many disappointments, people came and went and you weren’t interested in temporary. You sat down at your vanity and stared at the reflection in the mirror. Did tonight have to come around so soon?

You’d just finished off your hair when you heard the doorbell chime. Standing up, you smoothed the front of your satin skirt and took a deep breath. As you opened the door you were greeted by 4 beaming faces.

“Y/N, you look positively radiant, my dear!” Josh’s voice rang out as he pushed to the front and wrapped his arms around you.

“Hi Josh.” You smiled into his curls.

One by one the boys greeted you with friendly embraces and entered the flat, until it was just you and Jake stood there.

“Hi, Angel.” He grinned, bending to press a kiss to your cheek. You turned your face and your hand found your way up into his hair as your lips crashed against his. Jake, seemingly taken aback by your forwardness, relaxed and melted into your kiss. His hands snaked around your waist and he pulled you closer into him.

“Miss me?” He teased, lips still pressed against yours. You pulled back, raising an eyebrow, before turning to make your way in. You hear him chuckle to himself softly.

“Thank you all so much for coming.” You address the room.

“It is our pleasure, thank you lovely ladies for hosting.” Sam replies. He’s over by the oven next to Kat, watching her intently as she stirs the sauce on the hob. Kat is probably one of the most beautiful women you’ve ever seen, her features are sharp and pixie-like, with big green eyes like pools of molten emerald. Her long, auburn hair is naturally curly and is styled in a half up-do. It’s not hard to see why Sam is hovering.

“So, Kat, how long have you been a fan?” Sam questions, leaning on the counter next to her.

“Who says I’m a fan?” She responds with a wink.

“I did!” Jake yells from the sofa.

“I never said who I was a fan of.” You think you can just about see Sam’s heart pounding in his chest, like something out of the Looney Tunes. The thought makes you snort on your drink, but you quickly re-direct the attention away.

“Who’s hungry? Kat’s made her family’s famous spaghetti.”

“And no, you may not have the recipe.” Kat smirks.

Everyone tucks in and you hear a symphony of slurps and mmms.

“Kat, where did you learn to cook like this? It’s amazing!” Danny asks.

“My Nonna is Italian, so she’s very strict about how my family cook. This recipe has been passed down through generations.”

“Jake is somewhat of a chef himself.” Josh offers, receiving a swift elbow to the ribs by Jake.

“I’m not that good!”

When everyone has finished eating and complimenting Kat on her culinary skills, Sam jumps up from the table to retrieve the dirty plates and carries them to the sink.

“Oh yeah, who are you trying to impress, Sam?” You probe.

His head snaps to look at you and his cheeks flush. “Uhh no, no one. Just being a helpful guest.” He grins sheepishly. Kat walks over to him, placing a hand on his arm. “It’s appreciated Samuel, thank you.” She places a quick kiss to his cheek and opens the dishwasher for him.

“Oooo Sam’s got a girlfriend!”You tease.

The evening seems to pass in a flash, everyone seeming to love Kat just as much as they love you. As they prepare to leave, Jake stands and clears his throat. You look at him in anticipation.

“So, as you know we’re continuing our tour in Dublin tomorrow, then we have another two UK venues before we head further South.” He pauses, glancing at the boys. “We’ve all been talking, and if you want to we’d love you to come to our last stop in Europe.” You stand, wide-eyed, wondering if you’ve heard him correctly.

“Your last show is in Portugal.”

“Yeah, don’t worry, everything would be taken care of. Your flights, hotel, tickets and VIP passes.”

“Jake, that’s too much.”

“Y/N, we’ve made two fantastic friends this week. We want you to be there.” Josh smiles, placing his hand over yours that you didn’t event realise was nervously clawing into your knee. Kat looks over at you and nods. She runs her own business so is free to to clear her schedule, and you’re currently in between jobs and in the meantime have been helping her out with admin and other ‘tedious shit’ she has no care for.

“Ok.” You breathe. The lads whoop and cheer around you, pulling you both into a group hug. Danny pulls out his phone and gathers you round, flipping his camera to the front and yelling “Say cheese!”. Jake loops his arms around your waist as you all huddle together to get into the frame. Just as Danny presses the button to take the photo, Sam plants a kiss onto Kat’s cheek.

“Mind if I post this to my story?” Danny asks.

“Yeah, fuck it. My face is everywhere now anyway.” You laugh. Kat nods her approval and the photo is uploaded. You all say your goodbyes and Jake lingers by the door, his face sombre.

“Hey, you’ll see me in two weeks.” You place a hand on his cheek.

“Two weeks too long.” He huffs, lacing his fingers between yours. You stand there for a few moments, soaking up the last moments with him for a while. He caresses your cheek and captures you in a tender kiss. The world seems to slow to a stop and it’s just you and Jake in that moment, nothing else matters but him. Jake Jake Jake.

He pulls away, eyes filled with sorrow. “Goodbye, angel. Take care of yourself. I’ll message you every day.”

“Bye, Jake.” The door shuts and then he’s gone. You sink down to the floor, warm tears rolling down your cheeks and onto your hands.

Why are you crying? Sort yourself out, woman!

Kat’s footsteps echo down the hall and she finds a space on the floor next to you, wrapping her arms around you.

“Hey, you just think about us tearing it up in Portugal. None of that, please.” She gestures to your tear streaked face and hands. “I’m going to the shop to pick up some tequila, god knows you need it tonight. We’ll stick on a shitty movie and talk about all the carnage we’ll create, they’ll never invite us anywhere again after this.” She laughs and you join in, always finding her playfulness infectious.

“I’ll be back before you can say ‘I miss my rockstar boyfriend’”.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” You smack her arm, then allow her to pull you off the floor. You plod into the bathroom and remove your makeup, then slip into some cosy pyjamas and settle down onto the sofa. A few moments pass and you hear a knock at the door. Chuckling to yourself, you assume Kat has forgotten her keys for the millionth time, so begin making your way to the front door.

“When will you learn to-”

Your blood runs cold at the sight before you.

“Connor, what the fuck are you doing here?” Your ex-boyfriend stands there, disheveled and reeking of cheap vodka and cigarettes.

“What the fuck are you doing? Not just giving it out to any randomer like the filthy slut you are. You’re fucking Jake Kiszka?!”

“It’s none of your fucking business who I’m fucking!”You huff.

The fury bubbling from within him is evident, he’s shaking in blind rage with his fists balled at his sides, knuckles white.

“How long have you been fucking him? You’ve always oozed groupie mentality, you disgusting whore. I’m sure he’s just using you for an easy lay.” He spits.

“Get the fuck out of here you freak! What you’re stalking me now?! You don’t own me, Connor!”

He charges into the door, knocking you down in the process. As he lunges forwards, two men walking past spot the commotion and run to pull him off you. They throw him onto the pavement outside and he shuffles to his feet before fleeing the scene.

“Are you ok, love?”

You can’t even respond, your whole body wracking with sobs as they roll from deep within your chest.

“Y/N, what the fuck?! What’s happened?!” Kat screeches from across the road, her arms littered with shopping bags.

You zone out as the two men explain what they witnessed. How had your evening taken this much of a turn? In your trance you’re being lifted and placed into your bed. Kat thanks the men and sees them out, then crawls into bed behind you and holds you, stroking your hair gently until you cry yourself to sleep.

[lavender-teardroplettes]

You should do Miguel and Si hcs (Weathering Feelings VN)

Since idk how many people have played it I’ll suggest doing so before reading this post since it’ll contain spoilers!

Hcs under the cut!:

This one’s a little more interesting than most to me due to the nature of the game and Miguel looking at the PLAYER and less so the stand-in he has for you in game, gets a little meta in the best ways in my opinion. UwU

Si would find the general idea for the game really cute assuming the download page is a little different from the irl itch page and doesn't include any spoilers. It would be neat if the moment he downloads it the page is gone since it's meant for him and no one else. (though this is an open mc headcanon even if it wasn't Si, I just think it's a neat idea). While he knows games aren't the same as getting real therapy, sometimes it's nice to harmlessly vent to a game just to get it out.

I think he'd play a "normal" route where he wouldn't notice anything off about the game just yet, not hitting the right flags right away and putting the game down for a day or two before booting it up again to try and get a new route with one of the other Doctors before going back to try and do a better route with Dr. Nubloso....only to get him again even after picking different answers. Weird...but he thinks "maybe I have to hit a flag first and clear his route first." He does better the second time around, but now things are getting...weird, and he notices that the game sprite seems to be looking directly at him.

Once he gets to the part where things get really weird and Dr. Nubloso starts talking about going into the game files before the route ends, Si gets really spooked and closes the game again. He's surprised and a little shocked at the change of pace in the story, but he also can't help but be a little curious about what would happen if he did delete the file. It's also around 2-3 am at that point of time, so he also thinks that maybe he fell asleep or misread something in his sleepy state. He sleeps on it, opens the game again, and plays through one more time to make sure, once again giving different answers, and once more getting the Cloudy Day therapist.

Once he confirms the weird ending and the request of deleting the file, Si looks around in the game files before finding it. His curiosity gets the better of him after a little debate with himself, and he does. Now....When he boots up the game again he is NOT expecting to see Miguel at all, and he certainly wasn't expecting to be talked to directly. He almost yelps and turns off the game again, but something pulls his attention to the new development and tells him to stop and hear him out. Maybe he's overacting and this is just really good...specific writing? So he plays on, almost exhausting each available line of dialogue Miguel has for him, even replaying them a few times before Miguel acknowledges what he's doing and gives him the whole 'oh, you're testing me and my loyalty' speech. And...he has to admit, he does feel a little bad for the character by that time....that is until he hits the nsfw route and gets WAY MORE flustered than he should've been. And yes....he played both routes. ovo

By the end of it, he gets the ending where Miguel resolves to break out of the game for him, and he's left confused when all that loads after is a glitched screen. He does some more digging in the files and finds some "easter eggs" from Miguel, getting flustered at two of the special pictures hidden in the files. Curiouser, Si- seemingly out of a whim- decided to read the game's script...and his stomach drops when he notices little notes hidden in the game's files from Miguel- even down to the nsfw scenes. Before he can really react or fully process that this could be real, there's a knocking at his door..... Miguel came to find him just like he said he would. :)

That's all I really have for now since it's been a hot minute since I thought about how this would work given what we have with the current demo, but as you can see it's a really fun premise to play with!