#I think it fits Maomao

[spatziline]

Maybe someday Maomao will learn how to love like Jinshi

[frankenjoly]

anyway starcrossed losers + jinmao BUT switching up the he/she's

[mallahanmoxie]

a truly darling dynamic in slice of life mangas to me is the beautiful, popular person (often a boy) who is virtually unreachable and thus isolated/emotionally closed off because of that very same beauty (bonus points of sad backstory is closely related to problems originating from that beauty) x ugly random passerby person (often a girl) who is either keenly aware of their place in the social order bc of their ugliness or is entirely oblivious to it all, and somehow manages to break through pretty person's walls. i just think it's a nice set up to explore how hurtful the concept of beauty can be as wielded in the social microcosmos that is japanese high school

[miserye]

man i usually avoid manga adaptations for manga's i've read like the plague but they did the apothecary diaries so good i'm like actually losing my mind

[crsssie]

a pathological people pleaser

word count: 4.4k

warnings: smut || pt 2 to and i wouldn't marry me either

summary: Jinshi's getting desperate to bed you.

夏

Jinshi contemplates what kind of a ring to get you. He really does. He looks through the designs that had been initially made for your marriage, but he finds inspiration in none of them. You would suit a ring that's crafted with only the finest of materials, not a ring that was just bought from the streets. Though, you had been going out with Maomao more often with some guards to have fun and buy food. At some point, the palace chefs are going to need to learn how to make a roujiamo that tastes like the ones on the street and not the fancy food that you had grown used to having.

He calls Maomao and Gaoshun for help picking a ring, but ultimately neither of them come up with something that would suit you. (He even asks his mother, but she is no help either.)

So, he rots in the confinement of your shared office, head spinning as he sketches more and more ring designs. The one of the current empress is nice, but it is not something of your style. The one that his mother had received was pretty as well, but not something that he desired to put on you. Perhaps a simple jade ring of your size would do better, but it seemed too plain compared to the kind of treatment he was supposed to give you. A simple jade ring would be fitting for him, but not necessarily for you. He would give you gold, but he wasn't quite sure what kind of a ring design would fit you.

He's gonna age from this, he swears.

Yet, he continues sketching at it between his paperwork, frowning at how big of a demand there are for eunuchs. The lower ranking concubines were still desperate, he finds. Perhaps especially with the announcement of his marriage... not announcement. He was married, but with the revealing of his marriage, it seems some concubines are getting desperate for some sexual release. Jinshi... really is no better than they are. He finds that he can't sit still around you these days.

He's... desperate. Yeah. Desperate is the right word.

"Rotting in here again?"

"You know, I'm starting to think you're actually Diu from your actions." Jinshi grumbles from his desk, shoving the paper with the ring designs to the side, catching your eye.

"To be fair, I am him, and he is me." You pick up the paper, tilting your head at the ring designs. "Designing rings for me? How sweet of you. Why not just use one from the treasury?"

"You deserve a new one." He groans. "I wanted to design one for you."

"Why not just gold?" You hum. "And then thread a pearl and jade orb through them."

"A jade ring would be nice." Jinshi hums, staring up at the pin in your hair. "To match your pin."

"Whatever you design." You hum. "I'm sure I will be satisfied."

"It has to be perfect." He mopes. "Or else I will not forgive myself."

"That's rather harsh on yourself." You hum, reaching for his brush as you sketch a design. "I liked the ring presented to the empress."

"The blue gem?"

You tap your chin. "Though, the gold isn't my favorite combination." You finish your sketch, noting down the color scheme, and Jinshi blinks at the choice.

"You just want a plain jade ring?"

"For the wedding ring." You blink. "The westerners are quite intriguing with the tales they tell. The women there boast many rings."

"You went to the west?"

You shrug. "A season is plenty of time to explore."

"She went to a port city." Maomao speaks up from the door. "Gaoshun is asking for the report."

"I sent it to him already?" You raise a brow.

"The one regarding the ceremony in the winter."

"Ah." Jinshi's fingers slide down the stack, pulling out a booklet between all of it. "Here."

Maomao nods, pausing as she catches wind of the ring design. "How about a ring with the royal family's seal?"

"I'm not becoming crown prince." Jinshi grimaces.

"I am sure the emperor would allow it regardless."

"I don't want a ring like that." You pause. "though, it would be quite a statement to wear it on the pinky."

"You want a divorce?!" Jinshi cries, heartbroken as Maomao leaves the room with the report.

"No." You shrug. "I might if you keep putting off the concubines' requests."

Jinshi jumps in his skin as he goes back to the papers, and you glance at the ring you've drawn.

"Carve a jade ring with a phoenix for our wedding ring. I do not desire gold." You hum. "And you are to have a dragon on yours."

Jinshi looks up at you, eyes gentle as he drinks in your figure under the setting sun, summer wind rustling the leaves outside, heat not too much to handle either. There is something delicate and breathless about you to him. You are worth so much, yet he had to spend such little time compared to the age of the universe to prove that you are his only one. Time is suck a fickle thing when it came to the clouds and sky. He supposes that's more a reason to treat you well and make up for time lost.

"Is that all you want?"

"What else would I want?"

"How about a jade pendant?"

"With the royal family's seal carved into it?"

Jinshi laughs. "Why not my last name?"

"Sure, pretty prince."

Jinshi flushes.

秋

You have tea with Ah-Duo a lot during fall. The weather cools bit by bit, and you sit in your yard, peeling the sugarcane as she looks through the files, humming at your writing, each stroke nice and clean. She puts the papers down, a maid rushing over to take them to your study, and she glances at the sickle and cane in your hand. It seems you have found new talents outside of the palace walls. It fills her with a sense of warmth, almost.

"How do you feel about the new eunuchs?" She hums.

"Some of them are rather attractive." You hum, not paying much mind as you cut off a piece for the lady.

"Is that so? Yue would have a heart attack if he heard you say that." She takes the piece, popping it in her mouth as she chews, humming. "It's sweet. I like it."

"That's good." You laugh. "I had the chefs just hand me whichever one." You continue to hack at the crop with the sickle. "Jinshi would be fine."

"I doubt it." She hums, spitting out the dry cane into the bowl prepared beforehand by the maids. "He is rather protective when it comes to things he desires... you included."

"It is only recently that he has become protective over me." You hum, putting a piece into your own mouth as you chew. She was right. It is sweet. "Which is also why he refuses to become the imperial prince."

"You would make a great empress."

"I would." You chuckle. "I have been raise for the role, after all."

"Though, this is better." She smiles. "You are happier like this."

"Oh, well as empress, I suppose I would not do too much. Jinshi, though? That poor man."

"He would have quite the work set out for him." She hums. "Though, you would be there to support him."

"I suppose." You hum. "It would be better had you been ascended to the position of empress."

"What is done is done." She hums. "I find it more amusing that your talk with the emperor of letting me visit worked."

You snort. "I saw the chance and took it. It would be a shame to not host you at least once in a house that is now warm."

"I suppose so." She smiles. "Does it not hurt to cut the sugarcane yourself?"

"It does not." You hum. "My hands are stained with sugar, and I work up a good sweat. I find it fun."

"Fun?"

You snap the plant in half, handing the peeled half to Ah-Duo as you continue with the unpeeled half.

She bites it, humming. "It is good. Is there a reason to cut it? I no longer remember."

"It's so you can get the most of it." You offer her one of the knives on the table. "Be careful not to cut yourself."

"I will." She nods. "Have you learned anything else?"

"A foreigner showed me how to peel a pomegranate." You pause. "Oh, and I have developed a strange talent for peeling oranges. It is incredible how clean it can peel with the right tools."

She nods, popping a piece into her mouth.

"How are the children?" You tilt your head, cutting another piece to put in the central bowl.

"They are faring well." She hums. "They are children, after all."

"I suppose." You mumble. "Jinshi went a little insane on their family."

"Not to mention he had full right, holding the army seal." She chuckles. "I heard from the maids that the imperial court threw a fit upon the realization that you had been holding onto something so precious and had just casually given it to Jinshi in order to save a maid."

"Not just any maid at the time." You snort. "Jinshi's dear maid."

"Of course." She smiles. "Though, he had been in love you. He had simply pushed it down."

"Like father like son, I suppose." You mumble. "Has the emperor visited?"

"Not yet." She pauses. "Is he planning so?"

You turn your head at the sound of footsteps.

"Jinshi." You hum, smiling.

He steps over to press his lips to your forehead, smiling fondly at your juice-stained hands, only freezing when he remembers his mother is with you. "...niang."

Ah-Duo waives her hand. "How cute."

Jinshi flushes, and you chuckle, pinching his cheek.

"You needed something?"

"The emperor is coming for a visit, niang." He pauses. "To our residence. He will be visiting the tearoom."

You raise a brow at Jinshi.

Jinshi shakes his head at you.

"Very well." You grin, shaking Jinshi off of you as you peel the sugarcane with eerie accuracy, cutting the rest into bits for the late consort to enjoy. "You can take the bowl."

"None for me?" Jinshi pouts.

"The emperor matters more in this case." You shrug. "I shall send some maids to accompany you."

"Alone will be fine." Ah-Duo nods. "Thank you."

You smile as she leaves, and Jinshi takes her spot, pouting at the sugarcane she had left behind.

"I want a bite."

You take the plant from him, cutting pieces off for him, watching as he chews, reaching for his throat as he threatens to swallow. This fucking dumbass.

You pry his jaw open, ignoring the fact that your hands probably taste like some sort of sugar, ordering him to spit it out. He listens, dry cane spat into the bowl you've held before his mouth, and his spit slides down with hit, the poor male panting like some bitch in heat. You let go of his mouth, exhaling as you mumble. "Good boy."

The words ring in Jinshi's head and shoot straight to his dick, and he licks your fingers unconsciously, eyes half-lidded as he tastes the sugar on them. Wait.

fuck.

He was NOT supposed to do that.

You freeze as something brushes your knee, and you stare into Jinshi's eyes as he stares back up at you, blinking rapidly, praying you wouldn't point it out. The two of you meet eyes, and you back up, sitting back down as the two of you wait for the other to speak up. Jinshi refuses to speak up.

You break the silence. "I'll wait."

"Thank you." He mumbles, cheeks red in embarrassment as he rushes off to somewhere private.

This is awful.

冬

some days you wonder how long Jinshi went without sexual release.

It's a strange thought, really. So, when you and Jinshi are wedded and you're waiting for him on the wedding night in your shared bed, you don't know what to think. Alright, wedded is the wrong word. The two of you are rewedded, and you are dressed in the robes the late empress had prepared for the two of you to sleep together in. You think it's too little, but apparently it's supposed to rile Jinshi up. Speaking of Jinshi, you wonder how he's dealt with getting boners. He... can't sleep with someone because he's a eunuch, but he can't just leave himself hard forever.

Jinshi stares at you from the door as you're lost in thought.

Skin. You're showing skin. He feels rabid at the sight— as though he were some carnivore in the wild, grew before his eyes. He feels as though he would go feral if he were to get his hands on you, so he stands there, collecting himself. He can't scare you off. He finally has you in his hands again, this time treating you properly, and he can't just scare you off because he's wanted to touch you for ages but couldn't.

"Jinshi?" You tilt your head at him, and he musters up a smile.

"I don't want to scare you." He pauses. "But I fear the maids did a little too good of a job with you."

He offers you a drink, and the two of you down it before you lick your lips to speak up.

"Why? You want to defile me?" You lean forward, almost as if to emphasize your point, and Jinshi flushes red.

"I really wonder how you learned to flirt like that when you were Diu." Jinshi sits next to you, fingers pushing your hair back as he leans in. "This is fine, right?"

"Would be funnier if I were Diu right n-" You're cut off as Jinshi presses his lips to have you shut up. He loves you, but god, were you infuriating sometimes. It was as though the winter and spring without him had changed you into a different person— not that he minded. You're charming no matter how you act or react. Your hair scrunches between his palm and fingers, and you tilt your head to give him better access, passion and longing staining your face as he presses his lips to yours and his fingers bloody with something he's wanted forever. Some sort of twisted passion beats from his chest to yours, a whimper spilling past his lips as you thread your fingers through his hair.

He only pulls away when you soften against him, chest pressed to his as he feels your muscles tensing from the lack of breath.

"You still with me?" He moves his hand out, your hair slipping between his fingers as you hang your head to breathe.

"I sure wish you weren't good at everything you did," You keep your head hung, unraveling his robes with ease, palming his cock through the fabric wrapped around his waist. Jinshi's hips shift slightly for more friction, and your hand presses down on his hipbone, forcing him to still as you pull on the strand to free him, licking your lips at his length. "I don't think you're going to fit, pretty boy."

"We'll make it fit." He hisses out as you let the spit on your tongue roll onto the tip of his cock, smearing the precum with your saliva, your fingers smooth against his length as you spread it. Jinshi whimpers as you do, the ring around your finger cool against his skin, and you lean in to stare up at him through your lashes, biting your bottom lip as your hand speeds up. Jinshi whimpers, hand flying to wrap around your wrist and hold you still, and you tilt your head, yelping as he takes your lips pushing you back into the mattress. You lean into the kiss as he tugs on the bow, string coming out and top falling off with ease as his fingers brush your tits, thumb pressed to your nipple, humming into your mouth at the feeling of it hard. "Let me take care of you tonight." He huffs, pulling from you as he forces your tits up with his hands, pinching your nipple to catch a wince from you.

"Mean." You pout, no real annoyance on your face, and Jinshi busies himself with your chest, lips pressing a kiss to the meat of your chest, biting down— almost as though to mark you as his territory. It irks him some days that the maids still have lingering crushes on you from when you were Diu. So, his bites trail up from your chest to your neck, canines crazing over your pulse point as he bites down, hands sliding down to hold your waist as you crane your neck and whimper. Jinshi leans to force his chest to yours, and your fingers curl uncomfortably next to you as he sucks on your neck, purple blooming across your skin wherever his lips were.

"You're so pretty." Jinshi mumbles, finally pulling his lips off of you with a pop, staring down at you as you're suddenly aware that you are bare. You try to hide yourself but Jinshi makes work of his hands swiftly, holding your wrists together as he rolls his hips against yours experimentally. "I wonder how much of my reading is going to pay off."

"Studying through indecent literature? How sinful of you." You arch your back as he pulls your undergarments off, spreading your legs slightly as he slides his index finger down your slit, taking note of the slick threatening to spill out.

"I'd say this is worse, though." He slides a finger into you with ease, and you whimper as he curls it, nails slightly grazing your walls, making you gasp. "You sound so sinful like this. I sure hope you didn't let any other man see you like this."

"And if I did?"

"Then I'd suppose I'd just have to ruin their life." Jinshi straightens his middle finger as he curls his index out of you, sliding both into you at once. You shift slightly at the stretch. Jinshi curses under his breath at how tight you are. He doesn't want to break you your first night. So, he spreads his fingers in you slightly, thumb on your clit as he tries to loosen you. Instead, you flutter around him, only a light gasp freeing from your lips as he furrows his brows. He spreads his fingers, trying to make space for a third and get a reaction out of you. Instead, you don't react, simply shifting your hips to accommodate the stretch from his fingers.

"Am I bad?" He pouts, thumb finding your clit.

"No." You breathe, squirming from his touch.

"Am I average?"

"Jinshi, I have no idea. This is as much of my first time as it is yours." Your wrists fight against the grip of his hand, and he lets them go, lowering his face to your pussy instead, hooking your knees over his shoulders as he pulls you up. You back arches dramatically as he wraps his arms around your thighs, and Jinshi presses his tongue flat against your cunt, licking up as you jolt. He watches as your pussy flutters around nothing, and he slides his tongue in, moaning into your against as he tastes you. So this is what you taste like— some mixture of sin and lust, nectar that would put even the sweetest of peaches to shame. It would drive Jinshi to madness, he supposes.

Your fingers grasp at the pillow above your head, whimpering with each flex of Jinshi's tongue, and his fingers dig into your thighs, earning a squeal from your lips as you feel something tighten in your stomach. Your eyes widen as your nails dig into the sheets and your back arches impossibly more, tears in the corner of your eyes as Jinshi sucks at your orgasm, ignoring the mess of slick sliding down his chin and splattering onto the sheets. You turn red in embarrassment at the mess, but Jinshi pays it no mind, continuing to lap at your pussy, eyes digging into yours as he puts on a show for you. You look away from his eyes, opting to make a mess on his tongue instead, eyes rolled to the back of your head as a second orgasm crashes upon you. Jinshi drinks it up just as eagerly as the last, eyes half-lidded as

Your legs shake as Jinshi lets you down, fingers wiping the slick from his face as he pumps himself with it, and then sliding his tip beneath the hood of your clit to further coat his dick in your cum. You shift against his cock, grinding lightly into him as he chuckles. "Patience, beloved."

"I'd say you're worse than me." You heave, walls fluttering around Jinshi's length as he slides in. He notices the way your skin lifts with him inside of you, and he presses down on the bulge, blinking slowly. You gasp, stomach flexing out of instinct, pussy clenching around Jinshi with a hiss. Jinshi stays still, thumb brushing your clit to incite a reaction from you, earning him a lewd whimper. The sound shoots straight to his cock, head spinning as he slides his palm up your abdomen to your chest, pinching your nipple as he swallows.

"This is fine, right?"

"Insecure?" You roll your hips in affirmation. "I wouldn't have married you or let you catch me if it wasn't."

"Tease." He grumbles, taking your legs and folding them to your shoulders, forcing himself further into you. You moan, clenching around him as he moves, holding you down by the hips as he slams into you with each thrust, gasps slipping past your lips and colors in your vision as he moves. Flowers blossom in your lungs as you try to catch your breath, head spinning deliciously at the taste of Jinshi's lips on yours, a light fragrance from the rice wine he had taken mixing with the one on your lips, and you moan into his mouth, squirming from his touch. Your legs relax over his shoulders as he presses into you, fingers digging into the plush of your thighs, hair sliding off his shoulders to cage you in as you whimper.

The wind rustles the trees outside as you cum around Jinshi the first time, brows knit together and eyes closed as your face twists from the unfamiliar sensation, head thrown back and lips parting once the crash ended, and Jinshi stills, hand reaching to brush your hair to the side, cupping your face with his hand. "You alright?"

"Felt weird." You mumble. "Did you..?"

"No." Jinshi hums. "Would you like me to? Inside?"

"I don't mind." You whisper.

"Alright," He starts moving again, focusing on himself as your legs slide off his shoulders and fall into the mattress, hooking behind his pelvis as he thrusts, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as he pistons into you, your breath caught in your throat as you see white and stars, drool threatening to leak down your chin and choke you with your head thrown back and muscles tense. Jinshi pants into your ear as he feels himself get close, pulsing and ebbing inside of you with each roll of his hips, your name spilling past his lips in some sort of raw desperation and begging, only spilling into you once you call his name back through your cloudy haze, white painting your walls as white fills your vision, the same white visible in the air on the snowy trees.

His breath mixes with yours as he rests his forehead on yours, bare skin pressed to yours, sweat and cum mixing with your own, the two of you merged as one. In the distant past, you loved him until it physically destroyed you, and in the distant future he will love you until he is stuck in the same destruction that had dragged you away from him. Only then would he forgive himself, lips spreading into a gentle smile, eyes staring into yours as yours are closed, catching your breath as your chest rises and falls, vine of hickeys and bruises trailing down from your neck to your waist. Your walls flutter around him as you recover from another orgasm, skin flushed like peonies as Jinshi tilts his head to press a kiss to your shoulder.

"Still with me?" He presses his palm to your cheek, palm brushing your skin.

"Yes." You pant, grimacing at the squelch that sounds when he pulls out of you.

"I wonder if we'll be with child."

"I doubt it's this easy." You mumble, lashes fluttering. "Would you want one?"

"Up to you." He mumbles, reaching to the side to pour himself another glass of wine. "We do not have to worry about succession either."

"Oh, I've never been so thankful to have not ended up where I was supposed to." You sigh in relief.

"You do not want one?"

"Not my priority." You hum. "Unless you wish for one."

"You are my priority." Jinshi hums, offering you a glass. "Another?"

"No." You roll onto your stomach to stretch your back. "We have plenty of time as well."

"I suppose." Jinshi hums, holding his hand out for yours.

You give him your right hand, and he pouts.

"Your left. The ring."

You free your arm and hold it out, and Jinshi kisses your knuckles gently, eyes closed as he hums contently.

"We match." He smiles, lips curled into a gentle smile, eyes full of a warmth you had forgotten he was capable of. You smile, a laugh bubbling out of your chest as he fiddles with your fingers, some sort of domestic ambiance filling the room. And just like that, your anxieties fade away, and a smile makes way on your face.

"I love you." He hums, lips pressed to your forehead as he lays next to you, still holding your hand, his ring brushing against yours.

"I love you too." and you close your eyes, body relaxing into his, heartbeat one below the missing sun.

[myapothecarydiary]

Eunuchs, Value, and Appearance– Brief Thoughts on Beauty and Gender in The Apothecary Diaries Manga Volume 1

This is an offshoot of my thoughts from Ch. 4 of the manga, but it also connects greatly to Ch. 1, so a brief recap of where these thoughts sprung from:

As Maomao and Gaoshun go to investigate the "ghost" dancing on the palace wall, Maomao again reflects that Gaoshun doesn't look like a typical eunuch. Her first instinct upon meeting him was the classify him as a "military man" but because he was in the rear palace, he had to be a eunuch.

Meeting again, she thinks he looks "very masculine" and not "like a typical eunuch at all." In this moment, we get another example of Maomao's understanding of and perspective on eunuchs and gender being challenged. Or do we?

A product of her time and background, Maomao has a very specific and somewhat rigid way of thinking about gender. I think that perspective ebbs and flows, but it is very much informed by the outline provided to her by the society she exists within.

Sometimes, what first appears to challenge the constraints of that outline actually works to reaffirm it.

Gaoshun appearing more masculine and like a military man is not presented in the story to challenge a bias but it is Maomao's first clue that something else is going on with Gaoshun, that there's more to the story. It is not a purposeful reflection on gender by the author but a purposeful piece of a puzzle Maomao is solving within the story.

The same thing happens later when Maomao inspects Jinshi's body and sees it is more muscular than a eunuch's would be. Without further investigation, the presentation of eunuchs that don't fit the stereotype challenges that stereotype, but the truth of the matter actually kind of relies on and reaffirms those stereotypes. Gaoshun isn't just a eunuch and wasn't always a eunuch. Jinshi isn't a eunuch at all. If they didn't seem like regular eunuchs, it's because they are not.

[And if we flash forward to how another character is addressed–Maomao observes that Ah-Duo appears more masculine than feminine, which reminds her of Jinshi. Seems like a great challenge to gender norms, but then Maomao's bias/the binary is reinforced by the fact that Ah-Duo's womb was removed. Jinshi is castrated, thus more feminine and Ah-Duo had her womb removed, thus more masculine. Or so it seems to Maomao...]

And yet, just because these moments weren't included to say something about gender, it doesn't mean that nothing on that topic is being said. And the fact remains that Jinshi isn't actually castrated/a eunuch! So he works to both reinforce Maomao's views on gender and challenge them. Though he isn't actually a eunuch, he still appears very feminine. That is, arguably in part due to the drugs/forms of suppression he uses to assume his eunuch persona and operate in the rear palace, but even without those measures, Jinshi still possesses a great "feminine" beauty. He is sort of a contradictory figure in that sense.

With that, I wanted to circle back to something I noted in chapter 1. I noted that Maomao is "disappointed" when she realizes Jinshi is a man and that his beauty is not possessed by a woman. I thought of this point as contributing to the conversation around gender and around beauty within the story.

I also put a pin in the idea of how Maomao values beauty and recognizes how beauty gives someone value and specifically how Maomao views beauty as it relates to Jinshi–a waste on a man, disastrously powerful on a woman, extra wasteful on a man sans frog (aka castrated).

These fuzzy reflections got some great extra translation-related context from @amiriirish (thank you for that!), specifically regarding the line "A man? That's too bad," Maomao's thought when she realizes Jinshi isn't a woman. A more accurate translation would be "A man? What a waste" or as it is written in the GX version: “'タマナシだけどな…もったいない' which roughly translates to '(He) doesn’t have balls, though. What a waste.'"

I love how @amiriirish describes Maomao's perspective in this moment as one of "a scientist, not wanting to see good genes go to waste" as within the historical context of the setting, a person's purpose is to get married and have kids/keep the family line going/pass on their genes. Jinshi being castrated means he won't be able to produce any beautiful children and so his beauty is going to waste by not being passed down.

I was pretty vague in my initial thoughts, but I meant to sort of hand-wave at these ideas (albeit in a much less articulate way) and though I do think Maomao's sexuality is another interesting conversation (and I personally favor the interpretation of her as on the asexual + bisexual spectrums), I didn't mean to highlight Maomao's attraction to Jinshi during their first meeting but rather her recognizing his general attractiveness and beauty. Love bi Maomao, but I don't actually think she was attracted to Jinshi at that moment. Like with her view of the "wastefulness" of his beauty, she is looking at him like a scientist/as more of an observer than participant.

Maomao's introduction to Jinshi is the beginning of her generalizations about his beauty and how she positions herself as an outsider in those generalizations. Anyone would be attracted to him but that anyone does not refer to her. At least not yet.

Instead, I was thinking of Maomao's disappointment at Jinshi being a man rather than a woman as a reflection of her upbringing in the pleasure district and her familiarity with female beauty specifically.

We don't get a lot from Maomao about beauty or handsomeness in men. Or when we do, she seems even more removed from it. Like it isn't really worth noting. I think this is because she has learned how beauty can function as a sort of currency or tool for women.

Even in the very beginning of chapter 1, Maomao reflects on how a "pretty face" (and a voluptuous body) can lead to a woman rising through the ranks.

@teaflowsthroughthesesims discussed this further in some awesome expanded thoughts:

"In the circles [Maomao] runs in beauty is power, or a means of obtaining it, mostly but not exclusively for women. In her view, it's fitting that the powerful be beautiful, and expected that it be used as a weapon or tactic of controlling others.

Beauty is also tied up in desire towards others. The desire of a customer for a courtesan is due to beauty, the desire of an emperor for a concubine naturally falls on the lovely ones -- and [Maomao's] own undesirability is tied up in her lack of beauty (i.e chicken bones vs. abalone)."

"This is why she immediately sees Jinshi's flirting as a tactic - beauty is a tool to be used. Also, she chooses ways to describe Jinshi's beauty in terms of how it would control other people - 'a nation-toppling beauty' or 'a sex appeal that would drive both men and women mad' (paraphrased)."

"Aside from her upbringing in brothels, this is also probably why it doesn't 'work' on her - she is always expecting beauty to be used as a weapon or tool."

With that being said, I think Maomao views Jinshi's beauty as a waste on a eunuch and on a man both because it means that beauty will not be genetically passed on and because it means that beauty cannot be strategically used as a tool by a woman. But after this moment of meeting, Maomao will soon see how Jinshi, despite being a eunuch and a man, can use his beauty as a tool too. Something she probably knew was a thing already (men using their looks), just something she's not as familiar with.

I think there also remains a curiosity in Maomao regarding the concept of Jinshi as a woman, which we see again later when Maomao can't resist trying out lipstick on him to try and see what he might look like if he were a woman. There's perhaps something self-indulgent in that, as well as something that brings together the world Maomao knew before and the one she is coming to know. Thinking of Maomao as a scientist, it is a little experiment, but though Maomao is practical and her view of beauty is influenced by that, I think she is more than her practicality and pragmatism too.

More thoughts in this vein will surely come once we get to Maomao's reasons for using makeup to add freckles to her face!

[rutilation]

This opening is replete with symbolism. 

Flower language has been a recent fascination of mine.

Do you want to make my new hyperfixation your problem? If so, then let's take a deep dive into the first opening before the new one airs tomorrow.

Before I start, here are a couple of things to keep in mind.

While the use of flower language in this show mostly lines up with Japanese hanakotoba, there are still a number of flowers here that hold particular significance within Chinese culture, and thus have additional meanings that don't line up with those from Japan.  I’ll be mentioning them alongside the Japanese meanings where I deem it relevant.

The following will contain light spoilers of content from the novels/manga which has not been animated at the time of writing. I'll try to be vague and sparing with it, but there are a few flowers I can't discuss without them.

Past the title card, the opening begins with eight blooming flowers dancing through the frame in rapid succession.  These represent the storylines covered by the first cour of the anime in order of appearance, and each can be found in the episode(s) they signify.  From the top:

Rhododendron: This plant is all over the first two episodes, so I'm going to cover its appearances before delving into its meaning. In episode one, there are two shots of the buds of this plant, one as Lihua gives birth, and then again as the doctor examines her baby. They're finally shown in full bloom as one of her ladies disregards the branch Maomao used to warn of the toxic makeup. In the following episode, Gyokuyou has seemingly taken a liking to the flower that saved her daughter's life, and a few clusters can be seen in a vase during several shots before Maomao uses them as an example of a seemingly innocuous plant that could cause accidental poisoning, and indeed, if you look closely at the background during the scene with the soldiers, you can see what appear to be rhododendron shrubs. There are actually quite a few different possible meanings for the many granular varieties of Rhododendrons/azaleas.  Luckily, the characters said the name of the plant out loud for me: shakunage.  So, this is Rhododendron subg. Hymenanthes.  In hanakotoba it means dignity and majesty, but also, on account of its poison, danger and caution. Those last two meanings clearly line up with its ominous usage in these first episodes, growing and maturing as the babies grew sicker. But in addition to their function as a warning of danger, I think there's a case to be made that they also represent Gyokuyou herself. As I stated earlier, she starts keeping them after the first episode, and Hongniang later starts growing the closely-related azaleas in the jade pavilion as well. As for how its meanings apply to her, Gyokuyou is regal, magnanimous, and never loses her composure (unless it's at Jinshi's expense lol,) but she's also described by Gaoshun as shrewd and cautious, being unwilling to hire any lady she doesn't absolutely trust, and constantly gleaning information to send back to her family. These all fit with the dual meanings of rhododendron. In Chinese culture, rhododendrons and azaleas represent womanhood and passion, as well as home and a desire for homecoming.

Cotton rose: A type of hibiscus, this represents Fuyou, decorating both her person and her chambers in episode 3.  It means 'delicate beauty' and 'graceful lover.' I think these are referring to both her skill in dancing, as well as her affectation of frailty and neuroticism. As far as I could dig up, its unique tendency to change color based on the time of day doesn't have particular bearing on its meaning in either Chinese or Japanese culture, but the story itself uses it as a metaphor for Fuyou hiding her passion, will, and cunning behind a wallflower exterior.

Balloon flower:  In hanakotoba, it represents undying love, sincerity, and grace. These grow in the crystal pavilion, adorn the iconography of Lihua's furniture, and likely inform her blue and violet color scheme. Its last two descriptors gesture towards Lihua's style and personality. She's elegant and staid, but she also takes everything quite seriously, and wears her heart on her sleeve. As for the undying love element, I see that as alluding to her love for her son, her agony at his passing, and her hopes of reclaiming that love again through having another child.

Violet: This one actually tripped me up for the longest time.  The flowers in the opening looked like hostas to me, but no matter how closely I looked at the backgrounds in this show, I couldn’t find anything along those lines.  Eventually though, I caught on that these must be the violets from episode five, even if they’re a different color from those shown in the episode.  And also droopier.  Anyway, violets mean humility, sincerity, and ‘a little bit of happiness.’  In the episode proper, they are crushed underfoot as Maomao narrates about the lengths she had to go to keep herself safe while growing up in the red-light district, illustrating how even the modest aspirations of an ordinary peasant are in perpetual danger in such a cutthroat environment.

Chinese aster: Daisies and asters are my least favorite flowers to identify.  They all look the same.  As such, I’m a little less confident about this one, but I think it’s a Chinese aster.  The leaves and buds look similar, and the context in which it appears in episode six suits its meaning.  As Lishu’s ladies disparage her so-called pickiness, a shot of this flower opens the episode.  While the Chinese aster’s meaning changes based on color, white in particular means ‘please believe me.’ I think that speaks for itself

Toad lily:  This appears twice during episode eight, where Maomao gets drawn into the mystery of an attempted murder during her vacation.  Toad lilies symbolize hidden thoughts and intentions, alluding both to the possible conspiracy on the part of the women of the brothel, and to the fact that Maomao will never really know the truth of the incident, having to content herself with speculation.

Sacred bamboo: This one is easy to miss, because while the plant is in full bloom in the opening, it’s laden with berries in the show proper.  This is Nandina, a.k.a. the sacred bamboo, a mainstay of autumn and winter floral arrangements in both China and Japan.  It’s considered auspicious, symbolizing a reversal of ill fortune into prosperity--the precise opposite of how it’s presented in episode nine of the show.  There, Maomao fiddles with the plant as she contemplates all the instances she’s seen of good fortune being struck down by tragedy, and the prospect of that same sword of Damocles falling upon her head as well, a harbinger of eucatasrophe being used to symbolize straight catastrophe.  Also worth noting is the fact that the plant is very poisonous, so much so that it has a reputation for killing any birds which try to eat its berries; I think that bit of trivia might be the inspiration behind the decision to ironically invert its lucky image.  In addition to its central appearance in episode nine, it can also be seen in Lishu’s chambers in episode ten, mixed in among the vases of white camellias.

Japanese azalea: These mean passion and steadfastness, alluding, in my view, to Fengming’s devotion towards Ah-duo.  Fun fact: did you know that honey made from toxic azaleas, termed ‘mad honey,’ is sometimes manufactured on purpose?  It’s not super legal in most of the world, but apparently it can be used as a psychedelic.

After this, we see a panning shot of seven flowers, with the top four representing the high-ranking concubines, and the bottom three representing the high-ranking courtesans. While the first set of flowers grew from buds and flew across the screen, this set consists of still images. If I were to hazard a guess as to why, I'd say that it's because those previous flowers were conveying the movement of emergent stories, while these upcoming flowers portray the relatively static personality traits of individual characters. I'm going to tackle these in reverse order, as the first three flowers to appear are somewhat tricky to talk about.

Peony: This flower represents Gyokuyou, and in addition to appearing in her non-diegetic floral backgrounds, it also decorates the tapestries of the jade pavilion. In Chinese culture, peonies are one of, if not the most, important flowers. They represent feminine beauty, pride, honor, renown, wealth, prosperity, high-status, opulence, and a nobility of spirit. They are considered to be the king of flowers, and were historically only permitted to be grown by nobility. All of these superlatives are likely alluding towards Gyokuyou's status as the emperor's favorite consort, with the best shot at becoming empress.

Balloon flower: See above.

Lily-of-the-valley: This means purity, chastity, humility, and 'happiness will come again.' While the first three all seem to fit Lishu on their face, I find myself curious about the fourth meaning. I'm only partway through the third novel, but if this indicates that, at some point in the future, Lishu finally catches a break, then I'll certainly be happy to see it.

Dendrobium: In China, orchids in general are associated with elegance, refinement, and good taste, which fits with Maomao's description of the garnet pavilion as being beautiful in a minimalist sort of way. They also represent the virtues of an ideal gentleman-scholar: integrity, humility, temperance, and nobility. Furthermore, they are considered emblematic of spring; it, along with bamboo, chrysanthemum, and plum blossom, represent the four seasons. Returning to Japanese symbolism, the flower associated with Ah-duo seems to specifically be Dendrobium nobile. Nobile in particular means 'honest and to-the-point' in hanakotoba, likely alluding to Ah-duo's candid personality, and the fact that she is on casual terms with the emperor.

Regarding the final three flowers, the show itself doesn't explicitly tie any one of them to a particular courtesan--their flowers only appear as a group in episode twelve. But, by contemplating their meanings, and with some help from the characters' wiki pages, we can make some educated guesses.

Yulan Magnolia: This one, I'm guessing, represents Joka. On one hand, I'm kind of dumping her with this because the other two flowers just seem to fit the other two courtesans better, but its attributes nonetheless seem to accord what we know of her character--which admittedly isn't very much. In hanakotoba the yulan magnolia means nobility, sublimity and a love of nature. In China, its pretty similar: purity, nobility, dignity. It's also worth noting that they're commonly planted around Buddhist temples in China, and have been for many centuries, granting them an air of spiritual profundity. Joka is said to be aloof and cold, which is part of her appeal as a courtesan. While chrysanthemums and plum blossoms have a warmer aspect to their meanings, the loftiness of magnolia hews more closely to her characterization. Then there's the matter of her name, which is apparently a stage name. It translates to 'Lady Ka' (or 'Hua,' if you want to go with the Mandarin pronunciation.) Now, the 'ka' in her name is written as 華, and in the story, that character is only permitted to be used by the emperor and his family. So, for her to use it, even as a stage name, is a pretty bold pretense to nobility.

Chrysanthemum: In Japan, chrysanthemums are associated with nobility and the imperial family. In China, they are associated with longevity, endurance, and vitality, on account of their long-lasting blooms that persist late into autumn. I think this is most likely to be Pairin's flower. She's one of the few courtesans who's in her line of work because she wants to be, and is flourishing in an environment where others are desperate and debt-ridden. That covers 'vitality,' and Lihaku can attest to her endurance, if you know what I mean... Moving on, its mentioned in the novels that she's actually in her thirties, but still looks quite young, again harkening to the chrysanthemum's persistence.

As far as symbolism is concerned, chrysanthemums do seem to fit her character better than magnolias. But, something that gives me pause is her name, which means 'white bell,' on account of yulan magnolias being white and having a bell-like shape. I still think it's most likely that the chrysanthemum, and not the magnolia, belongs to her, but it was too notable a coincidence to not at least mention.

Plum Blossom: We can safely assume this one refers to Meimei, as her name is written with the character for plum. As plum trees are among the earliest to bloom each year, and will even bloom while snow still covers their branches, both China and Japan associate them with resilience, hope, inner-strength, and renewal. We don't know much about Meimei either, but my impression of her is that she seems to be the nicest and most even-keeled of Maomao's sisters.

Following this parade of showy flowers, we finally glimpse the emblem of our protagonist, Oxalis corniculata, the creeping wood sorrel, downcast and huddled amidst the underbrush of a forest. Whereas the other flowers we've seen thus far are primarily ornamental (even if some are also edible/medicinal,) wood sorrel is herbaceous and weedy, and is unlikely to grace any vases, wreaths, or arrangements. If it were spotted in a noble's garden, it would likely be uprooted, but to the peasant who finds it growing in a ditch, it's a tasty snack.

In hanakotoba, wood sorrel means joy, 'shining heart,' and 'a mother's love.' All three descriptors, I believe, are relevant to Maomao's character. Despite her flat affect, Maomao has a strong passion and sense of joie de vivre driving her through life. Those further along in either the novels or the manga will recognize 'a mother's love' as (somewhat ironically) gesturing towards her complicated relationship with her mother. As for 'shining heart,' I think that will become apparent as we go further through the opening.

But, before we do that, I'd like to take a moment to examine the moments when wood sorrel appears in the show itself. Thus far, by my recollection, it has appeared in episodes one, three, and twelve. The opening shot of the first episode is of a wood sorrel, informing the viewer in no uncertain terms that this is Maomao's flower, (in case the opening was too subtle.) In the third episode, several wood sorrels dot the field where Fuyou sits with her lover, symbolizing how Maomao has aided and protected them. In episode twelve, a single wood sorrel is tucked inside a lavish bouquet of her sister's flowers, a visual gag paralleling them fussing and fawning over her.

Returning to the opening, Maomao is shown contemplating a subtle glow in her closed hands while a reflected, sunlit version of herself glances back at her. Then, as all the previous flowers fall away, as Maomao casts the light up into the air, its glow illuminating her face, the wood sorrel finally stands upright, and blooms in full.

Now is a good time to mention a relevant characteristic of creeping wood sorrel: it only blooms in direct sunlight. When crowded by other plants, it curls in on itself, closing both its flower and leaves. This serves as a clear metaphor for Maomao's personality; under most circumstances, she seeks to be invisible and unobtrusive, but when she's in her element, she commands attention and respect.

Following this, we have her magical girl-esque transformation sequence, with her outstretched hands forming the shape of a blooming flower as she dances through a whirl of yellow wood sorrel petals. She then bows down in imitation of the flower, taking the light back into her chest (there's that shining heart I mentioned earlier,) as she dissolves into the stoic, unassuming version of herself once more, closing out the opening. (Jinshi who?)

I'd like to end this analysis with an observation. While the real wood sorrel exists at the perpetual mercy of outside forces, Maomao is not merely reacting to a light source that exists beyond her control. The light exists within her, and she chooses when it will shine down for all to see, and when she will hide it away in the depths of her heart. To those who've gotten this far, thank you so much for reading.

[nijigasakilove]

The fact we got this and Frieren airing at the same time for 6 months.. I really don’t think people appreciated how generational that run is. What a time to be alive. Sad to see this end, but there’s the LN and S2 coming! GTA 6 and this in the same year will be wild lol.

Lakan plotting revenge on buddy for putting his hand on Maomao shoulder got me dying. How the author took him from being this seemingly horrible conniving person to a doting overprotective father gotta be studied. A masterclass in gradual character reveal.

S/O to Meimei for being the real fucking MVP of this series omg. The look of shock Lakan had on his face when she opened the door to be able to go see Fengxian was great. I thought my screen had frozen because bro was shook. He probably hasn’t ran that fast in decades lol, but such a beautiful scene with him seeing her again after all these years and even with the health condition she’s just as beautiful as he remembered both inside and out. After all the BS they been thru they deserved this. They were always happiest when they played Go so fitting that’s how their reunion goes.

Maomao’s outfit from the 2nd OP is finally here! That dance scene MOVED me. Beautifully choreographed and animated. Maomao is so gorgeous, man. No wonder Jinshi gets weak in the knees when he sees her get dolled up lol. Speaking of Jinshi, the fancams and AMVs are going to eat the scenes up that we got today. Him almost knocking her off the bridge, then carrying Maomao back home, so cute!

He really thought Maomao was going to confess to him there, whole time she just wants that Ox Bezoar for her experiments lmaooo. 😂 she definitely knows how to get what she wants out of him now.

Great finale, happy end for everyone. But the mysteries of the rear palace are far from solved. Still a lot of things left to be answered and I can’t wait for s2. They can take all the time they need cooking up. We can read in the meantime. I’m going to miss Maomao Saturdays so much.

Review: https://myanimelist.net/reviews.php?id=519355

[maomaop]

Finished KnH vol10 !

This was definitely one of my favs?? It felt so long and complete, I loved the pacing and how it was structured.

Characters like Rikuson, Basen, Lihaku, Chue, Tianyu and Lahan’s brother (god knows if we will ever discover his name.. what a shame!) getting more spotlight was really amazing I really enjoyed seeing their dynamic together, I hope we will get even more of it in the future!!

Basen

Basen getting his character development arc thanks to ducks was unexpected but definitely NEEDED! His bond with ducks and mostly Jofu was hilarious and really unserious but it fits him so much😭

The little meetings between Lishu and Basen were adorable, I love the route the author is taking for their relationship. They desperately want to be around eachother it really couldn’t be more obvious!! Thats how soulmates are, however they both decided to continue going their separate ways for now in order to become the better version of themselves. They need to grow up, mature, and gain experience and work on themselves for their distinctive reasons. Hopefully by then Lishu will be over the age of 18 and things will work out between them.

I still have to talk about our stubborn man Basen, I appreciated reading the insights of his mind, getting to know more about how he sees some things from his perspective along with his takes on them. He thinks he has nothing really valuable about him outside of his brute strength but he’s much more than just a strong soldier to me. Regardless of his stubbornness he’s a very loyal and determined man, he stays true to himself while still getting the job done neatly and proudly because he has full trust in his superior.

Moving on to MISS CHUE!

I had to make this extravagant for her

Where do I start..? She’s SO likeable, there’s so much things to love about her

As Maomao said she’s VERY characterful, and I must say its true that she doesn’t look like a married woman with child in the slightest!! She’s very unique and silly, her presence during this volume made things so much more enjoyable to me. She stands on business while keeping her silly side (except when her mother in law glare at her…) She’s smart, quick witted and have a wonderful personality? ALL IN ONE nobody does it like her

She’s just in her own world, and I absolutely LOVED how she handled things with Maomao from the beginning to the end. Their dynamic was to die for, I remember Maomao being weirded out by her in vol9 but I knew she’d get along just very well with her she just needed to give it some time, I CALLED IT!

Chue being married to Baryou is absolutely insane to me, I mean just finding out Baryou was a married man was shocking but imagine my reaction when I found out Chue of all people was his wife? They are polar opposites and this is why Im in desperate need to know more about their relationship… Chue keep talking about hanky panky with him and I just can’t picture that at all..? Maybe Baryou do have that dawg in him after all regardless of his social anxiety heh

In conclusion Chue is hilarious and easily one of my fav characters of this volume, thank you miss chue for making this volume an unforgettable and unique reading experience for me!

Now its PLOT TIME

This volume was really an exceptional one, its just the beginning of the western capital saga but the result of the set up that has been happening for the last two volumes is perfect.

I’m a sucker for the lore of the windreaders and the whole thing revolving around politics: The empress regnant, the Yi clan and their connection to the windreaders along with them committing subterfuge with Shaoh. The ritual to prevent plagues involves domesticated birds, Shaoh being involved in this whole thing just couldn’t prevent me from linking it to the white lady. I talked about it here in details, this is all very suspicious but EXCITING!!! Gyoku-ou is clearly the one pulling the strings behind this chaos and scheming things in the absence of his father. I talked about it already here while reading the volume and the latest chapters just justified my doubts.

Chapter 8 was one of my favorites, Nianzhen’s story was very dark and sad, it lead us into thinking him and his tribe annihilated the whole windreaders tribe but it turned out to not be true after the CRAZY informations they gathered thanks to Kulumu in chapter 13 (which btw was also one of my fav chapters), everything and everyone seem to be somehow connected.

Jinshi being used by the shameless Gyoku-ou, and Gyokuyou being toyed with… I’ll start reading part1 of vol11 but like Gyokuyou said in the epilogue her fight is just getting started so we’re in for s long ride !

[apothecaryscript]

Maomao no Hitorigoto Episode 3 : Cotton Rose / 猫猫のひとりごと　第3話　『芙蓉(Fuyo)』

Please note that the English lines are just my translations.

猫猫「芙蓉妃…美しかったな…。調合できない薬もあるということか…」

Maomao “Fuyo-hi… Utsukushi-kattana… Chogo dekinai kusurimo aruto iu-kotoka…”

Maomao “Concubine Fuyou was beautiful. I guess there are some medicines that can’t be compounded.”

猫猫「ここで、猫猫の豆知識。芙蓉の花言葉は『繊細な美・しとやかな恋人』。いかにもふさわしい言葉だな」

Maomao “Kokode, Maomaono mame-chishiki. Fuyono hana-kotobawa ‘sensaina bi, shitoyakana koibito.’ Ikanimo fusawashii kotoba dana.”

Maomao “Here’s Maomao’s bits of knowledge. The flower language of the cotton rose is ‘delicate beauty, graceful lover.’ Such fitting words for her.”

壬氏「どうした？そんな顔をして」

Jinshi “Doshita? Sonna kao’o shite.”

Jinshi “What’s wrong, making that face?”

猫猫「もとからこんな顔です」

Maomao “Moto-kara konna kao desu.”

Maomao “My face has always been like this.”

壬氏「わかった。またものすごく失礼なことを考えていたのだろう」

Jinshi “Wakatta. Mata mono-sugoku shitsureina koto’o kangaete-itano-daro.”

Jinshi “I get it. I guess you were thinking of something extremely inappropreate again.”

猫猫「とんでもございません」

Maomao “Tondemo gozai-masen.”

Maomao “Not at all.”

壬氏「本当か？」

Jinshi “Hontoka?”

Jinshi “Really?”

猫猫（うぅ、うざっ！疑り深く、粘着質で…！あっ、まただ。高順様が言っていた、毛虫でも見るような目をしてしまったぁ…）

Maomao (Uu, uza! Utaguri-bukaku, nenchaku-shitsude…! A, matada. Gaoshun-samaga itte-ita, kemushi-demo miru-yona me’o shite shimattaa…)

Maomao (Ugh, so annoying! So suspicious and persistent…! Oh, again, I’ve stared at him like he was a venomous caterpillar, just like Master Gaoshun said.)

壬氏「またそんな顔をして」

Jinshi “Mata sonna kao’o shite.”

Jinshi “You’re making that face again.”

猫猫「うぅ、毛虫にも失礼な気がしてきた。はぁ。」

Maomao “Uu, kemushi-nimo shitsureina kiga shite-kita. Haa.”

Maomao “Ugh, I’m starting to feel like I'm being rude to caterpillars.” (a sigh)

壬氏「ん。後宮管理者の目を見て話さぬとは、無礼だぞ」

Jinshi “N. Kokyu-kanrishano me’o mite hanasanu-towa, burei dazo.”

Jinshi “It’s rude not to look the manager of the rear palace in the eye when you speak.”

猫猫「次回、『恫喝』。何だかまた厄介なことに巻き込まれそうな雰囲気だな…」

Maomao “Jikai, ‘Dokatsu.’ Nandaka mata yakkaina kotoni maki-komare-sona fun’iki dana…”

Maimao “Next episode, ‘The Threat.’ It feels like I’m going to get into some trouble again…”

[coldinternetllama]

My take on the epilogue of LN 5

Spoilers until the prologue of LN 6!

So I have been thinking about the choking scene at the end of volume 5 of TAD, as it has been bothering me a lot, since it seemed too OOC for Jinshi, at least in my opinion. I mean, sure, he does have some borderline toxic tendencies, but that was a bit too much, even for him. I have tried to think of an explanation that would fit him, but all of my theories didn't quite fit in with the story and the characters. That is, until another user pointed out how frustrating it is that Maomao sees herself as completely expendable and is even convinced that Jinshi would kill her, if he saw fit. We (and Jinshi) are aware of that ever since the time she requested to be killed with poison. Generally, this is part of her apathy towards her own life, as she always goes with the flow and tries not to stand out too much. A core part of her character, and yet one that frustrates Jinshi more than anything.

To explain what I mean, it has always appeared to me that Jinshi wants Maomao to make her own choices and, basically, take charge of her life. For example, after the incident with Fengming, he let Maomao go, because he thought that was what she wanted, and he wanted to respect her wish. The same goes for the time he refused to let Lakan visit her, as his name made her visibly upset. Jinshi does obviously care for what she wants.

On the other hand, her passiveness upsets him. The fact that she sees so little value in her life and assumes he does as well angered him a lot during her request to be executed with poison. Her lack of any (!) reaction to his advances later in the novels also upsets him in the same way. So I have been thinking, what if the choking was him trying to see how much he has to push her for her to retaliate, to try and fight for her own life, which she sees as so expendable. A reminder, but Jinshi also said he didn't want her to poison herself for her experiments. Maybe he was hoping that she would push him away and finally understand that she indeed has a choice regarding how her life and her relationship with him goes. Of course, Maomao being Maomao interprets this as some sort of punishment. And maybe she is right, we never get to see much about Jinshi's thought process during this particular scene. Obviously, it was wrong, and I am not excusing him, however he himself obviously does not know how to express himself or his emotions correctly, and thus his actions gain a possessive, even scary twist. And this is also how I would classify the choking: a twisted attempt to push her to actively participate in their relationship. To me, it definitely sounds more likely than a petty "punishment" out of jealousy. At least that is what makes sense to me and what I want to believe for the sake of him being one of my favourite characters (yeah, I might be biased).

To reiterate, he was probably trying to show her what could happen if she continued letting people decide for her. If we think about it, even her dance with Rikuson was not something she actively wanted to participate in. Maomao's passive behaviour might be alright for a commoner servant (and she loves to see herself as just that), however at this point of the story she is seen by everyone else as part of noble society and feigning ignorance the way she does it is extremely dangerous for a noble. Granted, Jinshi should have tried telling her with words and not violence, but she is also notorious for not listening to people, especially when she doesn't like the topic, so I can see why he might have thought this was the only way.

Anyways, thanks for reading, if you made it that far, and do let me know if all that makes sense to you.

[tobysetagawa]

[ROUGH] I don’t share unpolished work all that often on here but I wanted to share Tuesdays new reference as well as some of the things I’ve changed about her!

I was feeling kind of iffy about her for a while now so I decided to redesign her look a bit but mainly her personality!

I’ll leave her characterhub profile here, until her doc is ready!

One of my favorite changes about her is her new morbid curiosity? The only time she “smiles” is when something gory or gruesome is talked about, though it’s more of a manic laugh to herself. She rarely smiles, and laughs genuinely,,

(Kind of like Sucy with mushrooms and MaoMao with poisons?)

I think Tuesday would be seen as sarcastic, independent, quiet, mostly indifferent about most things. She shows every little interest to the things going on around her and sticks to herself.

others find her frightening due to her eccentric and weird interests.

her relationship with luffy is a little different and she doesn’t just follow along with whatever he wants anymore, she’s more likely to ignore him or fuss about it. Tuesday is more on the quiet side but has quite the temper, Luffy pulls her pigtails a lot

,, the whole fear of oceans I thought would be funny bc she’s a pirate but also fits her bc I think she is sheltered and never once had left her island.

[thedevilundercover]

An au with the batfam in The Apothecary Diaries.

Tim gives off such Maomao vibes. He would definitely be obsessed with poisons, the little freak /aff

Ig you could go with Dick as Jinshi (I don’t ship them so I would make them platonic)

I would put Dick as Jinshi because there could be a cool subplot about Dick realising that Tim really doesn’t give a single shit about how good he looks. It could be a like heart touching hurt comfort moment bc Dick finds a person who he likes who doesn’t sexualise him and he is around Tim without the detachment that his true status gives him.

The emperor is, ofc, Bruce. I really think he would be a better brother figure to Dick than a father tbh. He also would have a ton of concubines and consorts to make people underestimate him for just another free spirited rich guy who’s braincells were all killed by ethanol.

Selina is Gyokuyou bc why not

I don’t really care for Talia but ig she could be Ah-Duo

Jason as Lishu ok ok ok listen to me, yeah that’s fucked up that Lishu was married and a fucking mother in law at nine but that’s the point it’s fucked up and you’re supposed to go oh shit, wow that’s messed up.

what’s more he just kind of fits into her character. An emperor probably can’t just adopt a random guy, but he probably went oh damn that sucks for him.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

ARI MY UTMOST BELOVED I NEED YOU TO KNOW THAT EVERY SINGLE FIC ON THAT WIP LIST MADE ME GENUINELY GO INSANE BUT I’LL REFRAIN FROM ASKING ABOUT ALL OF THEM (but know that if i could . I WOULD) BUT . let me ask abt a few of them if you don’t mind hehehehe 🙂‍↕️🤭 OKAY SO.

be still my foolish heart (don't ruin this on me)

- so you decided to give childhood friends to lovers uni au w a pining/jealousy trope (one of my all time favs btw) A HOZIER LYRIC AS THE TITLE??? ALMOST )SWEET MUSIC) WAHHHHHHH

consider the hairpin turn

- i like to think of myself as the biggest proponent and number one supporter of BFB!kenny……… like so much so that i literally think of it weekly…….. AND W THE SIKEN QUOTE TOO I’M GOING FERALLLLLLLLL

i slithered here from eden just to sit outside your door

- another hozier lyric (FROM EDEN YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS) and the fact that its TACTICIAN!KENJAKU??? YOUR BRAIN IS SO BIG AND SEXY ARI…… him as a tactician is PERFECT i feel like he’s so maomao’s dad coded already (i love tacticians :3)

((also please know i’m also looking VERY lovingly at merguru, wolf!geto red riding hood au, and the naoya x reader fic… i love that siken quote so fucking much <3 ok ari i love you and your brain you’re consistently the most genius person on this site and i’m so sorry this got so long feel free to only answer what you want out of it hehe :3 I LOVE YOU I’M SENDING YOU LOTS OF LOVE 🙂‍↕️🩷)

- @gothsuguru <333 MWAH! tell the mice i said hello :3

KAIROOOOO MY ANGEL MY BABY!!!!! never ever apologize, i knewwww you were gonna ask about these and i’m SO excited to ramble :33c

THE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS SEQUEL IS ENTIRELY FOR ARIKAIRO NATION BTWWWWW those two are our beloveds …… BUT YES THE HOZIER LYRICS. not that i’ve heard thaaat many hozier songs but :’3 that one is my favorite!!!!! and i thought those lyrics fit childhood friend!sugu so well …. because in this fic it’s his turn to be a little unsure and scared >:3 lots of jealousy and pining and being afraid that you’ll start dating some uni guy and forget all about him….. scared of ruining your friendship by confessing…….. but his heart won’t stop beating when you’re around and he doesn’t know how to control it :< hehehe….. they’re both so smitten and devoted, i can’t wait for you to read this one 🥹🥹 here’s a sneak peek for my baby of all time !!!!!!!

AND THEN THE BFB!KENNY FIC . another arikairo special ….. hehe i am SO excited for this one truly!!!!! i’m super super nervous too because it’s probably the fic i care most about 🥹 so i want it to be the best….. but the outline is hard…….. and i’m scared….. BUT I REALLY AM SO EXCITED bfb!kenny is our boyfriend always and forever . teasing little shit. AND OFCCC THE SIKEN QUOTE ‼️‼️ the whole fic (and especially the brothers’ dynamic) is super inspired by you are jeff :33 one of them wants to take you apart, the other wants to stitch you back together… hehe…

but yes … !!! this fic is . soooo dense when it comes to lore and dynamics and backstory and narrative .. 😭 it’s worse than merguru and that one is already kicking my ass so . yeah . it’ll take a while for me to finish but knowing you’ll be there to read it makes everything feel more worth it 🫂 I LOVE YOUUU!!!!

ANDDDD THEN FINALLY :3c tactician!kenny….. kit is actually the person who came up with this concept so it’s her brain you should be praising, this is genuinely …. theeee most genius concept ever and it has me in a chokehold :’))) IT’S SO TASTY . he is theee slimiest most manipulative tactician Of All Time and i adore him for it …………. this fic fits into one of my fav dynamics ever, which is just. kind, benevolent ruler and their slimy right hand man 💀 bonus points if they are wholly devoted to each other which is basically the case here …. kenjaku might be detached and might be using reader but they’re also ferociously territorial over them . kit mentioned how kenjaku would behead people for calling his king weak and that’s just SO ?????? TASTY??????? in AWE of her brain always and forever .

ahh and the hozier lyrics !!!!!! i wasn’t actually sure what to title this fic so i was looking through lyrics of songs i enjoy ….. and the ones from from eden are all very monarch!reader/tactician!kenny coded :3c but i like the one with the slithering the most because kenny is truly soooo snake coded in this .

BUT YES !!!!! wahhhh i ended up rambling a lot but i hope this was coherent, thank you for asking about them my angel 🥺 you’re always so sweet and enthusiastic and ily . SOOOOO excited to dig my teeth into all your wips too :3333 mwah !!!!!

ask me about my wips !! <33

[dude1818]

Anime Year in Review 2024

2022 2023

Watched a lot more anime this year than last year, both seasonals and catching up on older stuff, so I'll try to keep these brief. Also created a MAL account this year, so I'll include my ratings from that for comparison, although it'll also be subject to recency bias since I backfilled it pretty late in the year

The Apothecary Diaries [9] - Fantastic. I loved Maomao and her obsession with poison. The mysteries were intriguing, although the thread tying them all together was a bit contrived

Suzume* [10] - A little unfair to compare movies to shows. This was incredible. I loved the characters and the story and the art. I only wish Shinkai had gotten to make it yuri like he wanted

Vampire in the Garden* [10] - Such a good tragedy. I loved how it showed both sides of the war were really destroying themselves, and then the two mains looking for a way out, but it's not that easy. Beautiful show

Cyberpunk: Edgerunners* [8] - I knew it was good, but I got way more invested than I expected. It threaded a pretty tight needle for a perfect ending [pretty similar to Vampire, actually]. And absolutely gorgeous animation

Arcane [season 2: N/A] - As beautiful as the first season. Loved getting a more in-depth look at what Powder/Jinx was going through and her relationship with Vi. Suffered from trying to also fit in the Mel/Black Rose/Ambessa plot

Dungeon Meshi [8] - I fully expect the second season to top my list, but the story starts pretty slow. No Falingon or Izustumi until the second cour, for example, and we still haven't met WL!

Your Name* [9] - Starts out silly but nice, but that twist was killer. I think the shift in focus worked really well and really made the story sing

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End [cour 2; all season: 9] - I adored the new characters this cour, but having a tournament arc was disappointing. It didn't have the emotional heart of the first cour. That said, the final battle was awesome

Mayonaka Punch [9] - Hidden gem of the season. Very funny show, but it's treatment of what it's like to be a content creator felt on par with Oshi no Ko. I really liked how it established Masaki as a fun character but a shitty person, but still not deserving of all that

Shadows House* [season 1: 7; season 2: 8]- Very cool concept. I loved the character dynamics in the first season, and the reveals during the second season brought a level of sympathy to antagonists from the first that I wasn't expecting. I'd love to learn more about this world, although what I know of the manga is disheartening

Makeine: Too Many Losing Heroines! [8] - I don't like romcoms, but I did like this deconstruction of them. It kept the humor, but also got to have the characters actually act like people, which you don't normally get

Weathering With You* [7] - It was pretty similar to Your Name, quite frankly. I think I liked the characters a bit in this one. Not the ending I expected, but definitely the one it deserved

Deca-dence* [8] - Ambitious twist. I don't think I would've watched something just about the cyborgs, but the Tanker parts more than carried the rest. I really liked Natsume and Kabu's relationship, and the way it handled Natsume's trauma and hang-ups was really nice

Undead Girl Murder Farce* [7] - Distills the essence of a good Sherlock Holmes story by making the detective a disembodied head. The main trio is incredibly funny, and no one else appreciates that, which makes it even funnier

Dandadan [7] - Torn on this one. Lot of really good aspects [the main characters and their dynamics, the monsters, the fights] and a lot that I do not like [the basic premise and genre]

Train to the End of the World [9] - Wacky and fun. The episodic nature of visiting the different realities established at each train stop really nailed what made Infinity Train so fun

Shy* [season 1: 8; season 2: 7]- I hadn't realized the second season had started airing when I started watching the first season. I like how it's ostensibly a superhero show, with the MC the only one trying to be in a magical girl show instead. The subvillains are all great

K-on!* [season 1: 7; season 2: 8; movie: 7] - Very cute and chill. I liked how the girls all played off each other in different ways

Mysterious Disappearances* [8] - I loved the twists involved in modernizing yokai and applying globalization to them. Kind of like Dandadan in that way. The mysteries were mostly pretty good. I know the show's ending is different than the manga, but I appreciate having a proper ending

Metallic Rouge [7] - I'm probably giving this extra points for the story it was trying to be, rather than what it actually was. Trying to tell a story about oppression where there is an in-universe reason for it is risky at this point in time, but I appreciate that they tried taking a third way out, that stuff like the X-Men never does

Magical Destroyers* [8] - Very fun having an adult version of a magical girl show, but oof that ending. I get it thematically, but it was rough

My Wife Has No Emotions [6] - Not normally a fan of plain romance stories, but I watched it for the robot, and was pleasantly surprised. It kept going back to basic slice-of-life, but there were so many tantalizing hints of worldbuilding to keep me hooked

Midnight Occult Civil Servants* [7] - Urban fantasy is cool. I like mixing government bureaucracy with yokai and mythological creatures. I wish the MC wasn't such a Chosen One though; that's boring

Mononoke the Movie: Phantom in the Rain [8] - The mystery and intrigue was very interesting. The art style was neat, although I found it hard to watch for that long at once. I feel like the Medicine Seller himself was kind of extraneous here, though

Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid* [season 1: 8; season 2: 7]- I did not have high hopes for this one, but it was a surprisingly endearing relationship story. Some of the more egregious character designs were just too awful, though [Lucoa, Ilulu]

Spy x Family Code: White [7] - Cute. I thought it did a great job of balancing the spy, assassin, and school parts of the story, which the anime doesn't tend to have time to do. The poop sequence was way too long

Arknights: Perish in Frost* [7] - FrostNova and the Yetis were great. The sudden push to humanize the other Reunion members felt incoherent

Orb: On the Movements of the Earth [cour 1; ongoing]- It's certainly interesting, if not necessarily enjoyable. The fake-out main character was a bold choice, but I think it paid off. Definitely interested to see where it goes in the second cour

Magilumiere Co. Ltd. [6] - The concept was interesting, although I think the execution was a little boring. The characters were fun, but the pacing felt all over the place, and the actual Kaii fights were kind of wanky

Alien 9* [8] - Intriguing premise and fun wet kitten of a protagonist, but it was very disappointing that less than half of the first arc was adapted. Could've been a cool show

Shoshimin: How to Become Ordinary [6] - Not my normal kind of thing. The deuteragonist girl was fun and kept me watching

Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha* [season 1: 5] - I was expecting an actual sci-fi magical girl show, and that wasn't delivered until pretty late in the season. I do think later seasons may be more interesting to me. Fate was cool

* indicates the show aired prior to 2024

I also rewatched Bocchi the Rock! and Revue Starlight this year. I'm still picking up new things about RevStar; what a fantastic show. I also tried Good Bye, Dragon Life; Pseudo Harem; and My Deer Friend Nokotan and bailed pretty quickly. The first two are not genres I enjoy, and the latter was way too high-energy and juvenile

As for next year, I made a separate post with my thoughts. Looks like a really promising year though!

[ecargmura]

The Apothecary Diaries Episode 10 Review - Conspiracy Tastes Like Honey

Remember how I guessed about Jinshi being the Emperor’s brother but looked rather identical to Ah Duo and guessed that he’s actually the current Emperor’s son but has to pose as his younger brother back in my Episode 6 review? I actually got that right. Though, I did feel like it was obvious with the way Ah Duo is like an older female Jinshi. What shocked me more than getting the connections right is the fact that Jinshi is 17 years old. What? 

It seems that the baby exchange is a hidden political conspiracy that only a few know about. So, where does Fengming fit into all of this? Was she there to witness Jinshi’s birth and how he had to be taken from his mother to become the Emperor’s younger brother in order to maintain the bloodline? Is that why she’s trying to kill Lishu? If Maomao’s dad Luomen got punished and had to get a kneecap removed as punishment, what did Fengming lose? Or is she plotting Lishu’s death so that she wouldn’t get punished?

Luomen being the palace doctor 17 years ago during Jinshi’s birth and being involved in this conspiracy surprised me. I did have a feeling he had worked in the palace when he made note of it in Episode 7, but for him to lose a knee in the process must have been terrifying. After watching this episode, I think it’s a bit obvious that Maomao and Luomen are not biologically related. If he’s a eunuch and Maomao is 17 years old, then that means he’s not her biological father. That doesn’t add up. Though, I guess it could if Maomao was born earlier than Jinshi. Heck, we don’t even know any of these characters’ birthdays, so I’m going with the notion that they’re not related by blood as it’s kind of obvious with the way it was hinted at in Episode 8 where she was visiting a bed-ridden person, hinting to be her mother yet doesn’t talk to her “dad” about it.

I really feel bad for Lishu. It sucks being the throwaway concubine of the disgusting previous Emperor and now being the youngest concubine of his son, the current Emperor. She’s not respected by anyone around her, other than her taster maid who seems to have gotten closer to Lishu as she’s no longer bullying her. Her other ladies-in-waiting are two-faced sneaks, however. They talk bad about her behind her back but when Maomao interrogate her, they become her allies. It reminds me of high school drama in a way…

My only dislike for this episode is that honey scene with Jinshi. Ooh boy, that was way too creepy. If you like this girl, why do you keep harassing her like this? This is why Maomao doesn’t like you! This is also why I don’t ship you two together because Maomao can do a lot better than this guy. I don’t care if he’s technically the second most powerful person in the palace. Men who can’t take a hint are the worst (to me).

Anyways, I do wonder much this conspiracy will spiral. Will Fengming be caught? How will they do it? I honestly can’t wait for the next episode.