#I think about these two 1000% more then I talk about them they are so special and important to me

[atlasblue85]

ok as a raised catholic who is well acquainted with the list of popes wikipedia page i could not stop thinking about this so uh. here we go

some notes first:

-for the first nearly thousand years of the papacy, popes did not choose papal names, they just kept their own. John II was the first to choose a name (because his birth name was Mercurius and he felt it was not appropriate for a pope to have a name associated with a Roman god) but it wasn't until Gregory V in 996 that it became tradition.

-i've only seen the movie (and only once at that) and not read the book, but it seemed implied to me that the recent history of popes deviated from reality, which isn't super relevant but just to note that I'm kind of operating on every pope from like WWII onward not existing in movie canon. at the very least JPII onward.

gonna start with the ones we know

-Cardinal Lawrence - John - of course he would choose John, of COURSE. John has been used as a papal name more than any other name, of course Lawrence would choose that. He does not see himself as special or unique, he's just one more in a long line of servants of god. He would be proud to carry the same name as so many before him. Also, considering what I mentioned above about John II, I think he would definitely have taken that into consideration and would be honored to carry on the tradition of giving up his birth name, especially considering the implications of his name (there has never been a pope Thomas). (Popes John fun fact: the numbering of the popes John is messed up due to a few errors hundreds of years ago, so although there have only been 21 popes John the count is at 23.)

-Cardinal Benitez aka Pope Innocent - I mean. what a name to choose. He's portrayed as fairly apolitical in the movie, but he knows the truth about him will be revealed once he becomes Pope so like, talk about getting ahead of the allegations. It's such a good, smart choice and I love it. There have been 13 prior popes Innocent, the last being in 1724, and all but 2 of them (French) were Italian, which is also so significant considering Benitez's main rival. Just love this choice.

to the rest of them

-Cardinal Bellini - I feel like we know the least about him actually, aside from that he's extremely liberal in Catholic terms, but it's not like the papacy is known for being liberal so there's not a precedent for him to follow name-wise. it's tempting to say that he'd pick Thomas or Lawrence lol, but actually? I don't think he'd pick a name that has never been used, he wouldn't have the conviction for that (which is ultimately why he didn't become pope....). But I could definitely see him choosing Adrian as a way to still give a subtle shout out to his bestie, as Adrian IV (1154-59) has been, to date, the only English pope. It's also a fairly innocuous name which I think would be appealing to him.

-Cardinal Adeyemi - believe it or not there have actually been 3 popes from Africa - Victor I (189-199), Miltiades (311-314), and Gelasius I (492-496). All were from North Africa, much of which was part of the Roman empire for many hundreds of years. Victor was the most significant of these 3 and is also known to be of Berber descent, though he is usually (unsurprisingly) depicted as white. While Adeyemi is Nigerian, where there is not a significant Berber population, I think he would nevertheless want to acknowledge and highlight the actual first African pope, as well as subtly call out the hypocrisy of the church. There were two other popes Victor, both in the 1000s, so he would be Victor IV.

-Cardinal Tremblay - there's a tweet/post saying it's tradition for no one to choose Peter as their papal name out of respect even though there's no law against it but Tremblay would do it and like. yeah he would. or at the very least he would want to, but I don't know that he would actually go through with it because it would be wildly controversial and he wants popularity above all else. So what else might he pick? My first instinct is to say he'd choose a name from a pope that was extremely popular and well liked, so the most obvious choices would be Leo and Sylvester. However, there have been 13 popes Leo (last in 1903) and only 3 popes Sylvester (last in 1045), so that would make me lean toward Sylvester because I think he'd want a less common name. But I also think it would irk him to not come after Sylvester II and could see him going a Pope Francis route and picking a totally new name. Seeing as popularity is important to him, I think it would fit that he'd take the name of one of the twelve Apostles. Other than John and Peter, most of the apostles' names have never been used as papal names, which is appealing to him. So if he's not choosing Peter II and he's choosing one of the apostles' names, the natural choice is, of course, Peter's brother, Andrew. that's my final answer.

-Cardinal Tedesco - no way that man isn't choosing Pius

[nikolas-ghostbusters-fixation]

Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.

I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.

I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??

Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.

[fromtheseventhhell]

"A wolf with a fish in its mouth?" It made her laugh. "That would look silly. Besides, if a girl can't fight, why should she have a coat of arms?" Jon shrugged. "Girls get the arms but not the swords. Bastards get the swords but not the arms. I did not make the rules, little sister." (Arya I, AGOT)

--

The girl smiled in a way that reminded Jon so much of his little sister that it almost broke his heart. "Let him be scared of me." The snowflakes were melting on her cheeks, but her hair was wrapped in a swirl of lace that Satin had found somewhere, and the snow had begun to collect there, giving her a frosty crown. Her cheeks were flushed and red, and her eyes sparkled. "Winter's lady." Jon squeezed her hand. (Jon X, ADWD)

When Arya supports KITN!Jon + passes Robb's crown onto him and Jon supports Arya as the Lady of Winterfell >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[best-enemies]

I've reached season 5 on my CSI rewatch and I'm a few episodes past "Swap Meet", where a woman is murdered after attending a swing party with other couples from the neighbourhood. Near the end of the episode there's a moment that made me jump from my seat:

(Grissom walks up to Sara and takes the seat next to her. He's holding two cups. He hands her a cup of tea.)

[INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - BRASS' OFFICE]

Erin Brady: Everybody fantasizes about other people. (She glances at Grissom.)

Even you, Mr. Grissom. A neighbor, a friend ... girl at the office.

[INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - HALLWAY]

(The door opens. Paul Brady walks out of the hallway. Erin Brady walks out into the hallway. Sara is sitting in the hallway chair watching them. She watches as they meet and kiss.)

(Grissom walks up to Sara and takes the seat next to her. He's holding two culps. He hands her a cup of tea.)

LIKE!!!!!!!

Right after Erin ends her sentence with 'girl at the office', the first time Sara and Grissom meet again, he brings her tea. This might be an innocent interaction but to me it seemed like a nod to this relationship they have where both are into each other, know about the other's feelings, but can't/won't do anything about it (although Sara has kind of given Grissom an ultimatum). I don't know if it was intentional - I'm guessing it is, because I picked it up immediately. I might or might not have squealed in delight.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[bumblingbabooshka]

Ok. Get closer why don’t you.

[deepfriedpaddymayne]

Hi! I was wondering what you think about Augustin's sexuality esp during the getting pinned down/almost killed by Paddy scene=) I think he seems to enjoy it for a second, then gets annoyed and throws out the wife and kid line. But he also seems SO intrigued by him afterwards. Is he just comfortable in his sexuality?

hello anon first of all I am sorry for taking so long to answer this, it has been sitting in my brain for a long time. second of all mwah smooching you on the forehead for giving me an opportunity to ramble about my special boy

I am gonna preface this with the fact that while we do get a decent enough look at Augustin in the only two episodes we have him in, we do only have him around for two episodes. this means that a lot of my personal way of characterising Augustin is extrapolated from the little information we have, or from what I think makes a nice contrast with Paddy, because obviously those two are meant to be foils/parallels/mirrors/whatever it was that they were gonna do with them before the rewrites. replying to this ask is basically me explaining the process behind some of this extrapolation, because I think about Augustin Jordan a regular amount.

I personally find the way Augustin relates to his sexuality just... fascinating. on my first watch of The Sand Wrestling scene, my first impression was that the guy had to be ridiculously touch starved, because, like. it is undeniable that, even for just a few seconds, he was enjoying himself there. and okay, intricate rituals and homoeroticism and all of those things, but even then, Paddy is literally holding a knife to his throat. that should make you a little tense even if you are into sweaty wrestling with hot poets! and instead, Augustin is relaxing into it. as soon as the immediate fear goes away, he fucking melts under Paddy for a few seconds, and that's when the annoyance kicks in, after which his reactions seem a little more - contained, almost? he generally moves less and starts shushing Paddy, and then when he gets up shortly after he looks SO irritated (which is also so funny imo - my guy was just pinned to the ground with a knife to his throat by a guy who's famously insane and the most negativity he can muster is 'well that was annoying'). but of course, as you point out, after that, he is very obviously intrigued by Paddy - he's SO delighted when he realises that Paddy did just invite him to play russian roulette to prove a point, and in that entire scene he alternates between "my man you are insane what the hell" and "my man you are insane what the hell 👀". and the most obvious explanation for this is, ok, he's just very touch starved. sometimes it's just nice being held, even if that involves being threatened with a knife, you know? BUT WE KNOW HE'S NOT TOUCH STARVED. becuase we see him be physically affectionate with the rest of the French! he's not a loner who hasn't had any human touch in years!

which leads me to go, ok, well, then he's got to be very repressed. because that scene is quite sexual, blah blah blah homoeroticism of violence, while the rest of the affection we see him share with the others reads, at least to me, as very platonic. SO there is definitely some layer of repression going on - but I don't think it's a blanket repression of his sexuality. he's too confident later, when he goes up to Paddy and basically asks him if he's single while smoking his slutty little cigarette, to be someone who altogether panics at the concept of being into men. so WHY does he seem so irritated in the sand wrestling scene, and why does he throw in that line about having a wife and child? and I think the answer is that Augustin is a fairly controlled person. take the very composed confidence with which he shuts down Paddy's quoting TS Eliot at him, take the way he explains very flatly that they are used to following orders, take the fact that what he says to Paddy after the russian roulette is that they are here to defeat fascism, such a weirdly rational, to-the-point reaction to that entire interaction. he's upset in that moment, but he's getting himself together. he is very upset later, in episode 5, when he realises they've been betrayed, and even then, he keeps it together when he realises what Halevy is going to do, enough to encourage him and get himself out of there. Augustin is good at keeping it together, but here is the other thing - I think it's a facade. I think he's actually EXTREMELY intense, and this controlled rationality is not natural, it's learned. I am not sure why he would - though, again, I would guess that being gay in the 30s and 40s does all sorts of things to you - but I think he's taught himself to keep it together. and I think that's WHY he's so fascinated with Paddy, because Paddy is all but controlled. Paddy is a lot less insane than most people frame him as, but he is a wild, unbridled flood of emotion - especially when Augustin meets him, after Eoin, when the lines between feigned and real insanity start to blur. and I think seeing someone that's both so similar and so different from him is both scary and intoxicating for Augustin. imagine you spent your whole life teaching yourself to control your emotions and keep it together and then you meet a guy that's you, but whose heart is on his sleeve and constantly bleeding. terrifying, sure, but MAN, it must be a sight to behold.

and I think if you look at the sand wrestling scene from that angle, it makes it all make sense. he goes from the first moment of panic to elation to annoyance - and I think the annoyance is mostly at himself, because he's caught himself slipping, he's caught himself experiencing that rush of fear and adrenaline and probably attraction with a little too much pleasure. and that's why he says that he has a wife and child - not really because it's the being gay that he's repressing, but because he's kind of panicking at that flood of emotion (I personally believe he's lying in that moment - I know that it's possible that his file saying otherwise was just a mistake, but it's waaaay more interesting to me if he's lying. and, for what it's worth, the guy doesn't wear a wedding ring, on his hand or around his neck or anywhere else the costume department could have put it on him to signal that he's married). but later on, when he goes up to Paddy that evening, he's had enough time to kind of rationalise that emotion and slot it in a "well, yeah, that was kind of hot, but that's normal! regular body reaction to being pinned down by a hot man. nothing to unpack here", which obviously, insane thing to think, but it probably works for him, and I think that's why that relaxed confidence is back (of course, kinda too late by this point - my man is insane and now he's smitten).

so, tl;dr: I think Augustin is comfortable in his sexuality in the sense that I don't personally think he has too much of a problem with being attracted to men, but I do think he has a problem with, sort of, intense emotions and desire that he can't really control, and that's why he gets kind of irritated in that one scene. at the same time, he probably does want to break out of that strict control he's put himself in, which explains why he's immediately so taken with Paddy.

[crabbunch]

anyways i think that danzo and hiruzen are like those two old heckling muppets. i want to dunk them in milk and throw them against the walls. i think that they should work together to commit new war crimes. to me their dynamic is very much NOT "hiruzen indulging an old friend in his evil acts cuz hes sentimental" and very much "hiruzen is in charge of propaganda so hes 'nice' and danzo does the dirty work and sometimes they try to assassinate each other for fun." thats romance babyyy!!!!

[streetsandsodiumlights]

(tags from @no-1-rosalind-lang-apologist)

By the way "some aroace people still date and have sex" and "it's weird how internet spaces makes every single aroace character romance and sex favourable" can and should co-exist. Sincerely, an aroace person

[weapproveadamandsteve]

Tag game cause ive seen sooooo many ppl do it and i need motivation

This will probs get very few, but im putting high aims because yes.

10 - i'll try and figure out of any of the people in making Friends with at High school are homophobic how are we already here??

20 - i'll try and go to bed at a more fixed time cause ive been not hearing my alarms the morning and here????

50 - if they arent homophobic, i'll try and come out casually yo some of my new Friends, if they are homophobic im gonna maybe probs stop talking to them its been One night guys, i went to sleep

200 - i'll try and come out yo my mum as not straight, even though i think she already knows

250 - i'll try and come out to my dad

500 - i'll try to talk to my friends about the fact that ive been attempting sh

1000 - i'll talk yo my parents about going yo therapy

I'll add to this if we ever get here ( i doubt It)

Tagging a few ppl to start it

I HAVE FOR NOW DONE NONE OF THESE CAUSE IVE GONE TO SCHOOL ONCE AND TO BED NEVER SINCE THIS GOT ALL THESE TAGS

EDIT:

so as you guys can see, with the help of some crazy ppl ive reached the last point

And its only been two f ing days

So im thinking of starting with coming out to my mum and dad at some point in this weekend or the coming week.

I have not come out to any of my new friends cause im to terrified to ask their thought on LGBT.

I'll keep this updated i guess??

@forestgromlin @noahher @k-is-for-potassium

[lilacgaby]

title: gala gone wrong?

pairing: prohero!bakugo x prohero!reader

katsuki was suddenly forced to confront his feelings for you, when you were put in the date auction for charity.

the heroes gala was something katsuki wouldn't look forward to normally. but this year he had a plan. he was going to ask you to be his date.

...originally. he chickened out last minute and owed kirishima 1000 dollars.

he was surprised to see you come alone though, opting to sit next to him which made him fist pump internally. you were a very successful hero who also doubled as a model. for what reason you ask?

none really, you just did it cause days off of hero work were boring. walking runways, topping charts, and beating villains with style was just another day for you.

you looked especially gorgeous this evening though, working with another up and coming designer to design a dress that perfectly complimented everything from your skin color, to you hair, to even references of your quirk.

katsuki suddenly felt underdressed in his suit, but to be fair every hero who was a man was dressed in a suit. except for monoma.

the auction portion of the gala started before the awards were to be given out.

the awards were pretty pointless in katsuki's mind. the only ones that mattered to him were the final rankings of popularity, efficiency, and the overall category.

"you nervous?" you whispered, talking over the first few lower ranked hero's to be auctioned for a date.

"nah, i know i won at least in popularity." he said, trying to keep eye contact with you without stuttering.

"hmm. what if i won? huh?"

"shut up."

she put a hand over her mouth, when suddenly-

"and the last date to be auctioned, a night with the top ranked woman hero [name]!"

"huh? oh that's me!" you said, collecting your dress as you walked to the stage, leaving katsuki blinking in confusion to himself.

you were in this? i mean it shouldn't have been a surprise, you had a rabidly loyal fan base, even since U-A. but what was he supposed to do? bid?

"the bid starts at.. 15,000 dollars." you rolled your eyes and gestured for people to go higher, and they did.

"17,000!"

"20,000!"

"30,000"

numbers were being shouted from all around the room, with the highest bids barely even being able to be tracked. the bids ranged from new heroes who definetly could not afford you, to old men who you really wish couldn't afford you.

you covered your mouth as you let a laugh escape you, this was hilarious to you, you'd have to do this more often.

after a bunch of back and forth, one booming voice cut all the others off.

"500,000 dollars. cash." to your surprise it wasn't an old creep. grand, also known as shindo yo, had suddenly bid. just as they were about to call off the auction and announce shindo the winner,

katsuki's internal dialogue won and 'forced' him to bid too. "750,000 dollars." he declared.

he doesn't think he'd have done it had it been any other idiot who wanted a chance with you, but that loser had to go.

"sold! to dynamite! we've broken a record here folks, 750,000 for the charity of --"

the words faded into the background as he looked up at you, smiling and walking over to him. he felt is heart speed up, his hands drown in sweat, his hair puff out.

"if you wanted to take me out you could've just asked katsuki." you joked, taking him by the hand as you pulled him back to the table towards the back you two were settled in on.

"whatever, now we have an excuse to."

"don't tell me you like me or something katsuki? how embarrassing."

"i told you shut it."

she laughed and settled down, poking him on the cheek. "its okay if you do, i like you quite a lot dynamite."

he flushed red at that, tiny explosions being let out from his hands inadvertently because of how caught off guard he was.

she held his hand under the table, before looking straight ahead to the ceremonies going on in front of them. he smiled and leaned back.

the awards were pretty boring when compared to the view of you, so until they had gotten to the cool stuff he just eyed you.. daydreaming about the life you'll have together someday.

he focused again when the top three heroes in popularity, efficiency, and overall were to be announced by all might.

at the end of the night, not only did he leave with a number one trophy with 'popular vote!' embedded in its side and an all-might signature at the bottom,

he also left with a lipstick mark from you right on his cheek, some flowers, and a small note that read 'see you tomorrow :)'.

[bunny584]

OBSESSED: YUTA

A/N: Sweet, innocent, puppy-eyed boy who is no better than the frat boys you detest 🤭 (this is for anon who requested a lil crazy special grade sorcerer doing ungodly things!! Shoko feat The Boys ™️ is up next, then I SWEAR I’m done and back to AO3)

C/W: Aged up characters, College AU. Masturbation. Mature, 18+

“YUUTA?! Are you kidding me?”

You stop time.

Heads turn in his direction. But Yuuta doesn’t register any it because of your smile.

The 1000-kilowatt smile that the locker room rumors about. The smile that stops traffic. The one that obliterates his train of thought.

365 days since he’s seen it in person.

And suddently the year in Morocco for his University degree feels frivolous.

Yuuta places two bottles of disgustingly expensive champagne (courtesy of Satoru Gojo) in between the half filled red solo cups.

He’s doing his best to keep his eyes above your delicate, sharp collarbones.

He’s doing his best not to follow the Barbie pink hair string around your neck.

The Barbie pink string connected to the triangular bikini that is defying the laws of gravity, Mother Nature, AND physics to keep your busty, perky chest supported.

Not to mention the sheer netted tissue thin excuse for a cover up. Draped around the curve of your hips. It warms him hotter than the Moroccan sun.

You wire yourself through the crowded sorority house kitchen. And Yuuta gnaws on his inner cheeks. The predatory stares from from the frat drones scattered about ignites a guttural flame.

But he’ll deal with that later.

Because Aphrodite is barreling toward him and he is not worthy.

“I can’t believe you made it!” You launch yourself into him.

“I wouldn’t miss it. Happy 21st birthday, gorgeous.”

One of his arms is more than sufficient enough to wrap around your baby doll frame. Other hand in his pocket, while he easily lifts and spins you around twice.

Airy giggles spill from your lips. So clearly surprised by how strong he has grown. He’s bulkier. More toned. Hell of a lot more confident too.

Is he showing of a little? Of course he is.

“You’re here. You’re really here.” You stare up at him with stars in your eyes. Still in utter disbelief.

Your tiny, warm hands cup his face. Yuuta subconsciously melts into them. You always did strum his body like a harp.

“Yuuta, you must be so tired. Your bedroom eyes are even more…bedroom-y.” You tease.

Yuuta laughs to choke down a groan. He doesn’t need a mirror to know he’s stained mulberry right now.

Because why would you mention a bedroom while you are wearing a bikini he could snap with his eyes?

“Hey, be nice! You know there’s no amount of caffeine that can fix the bags.” Good, fucking save.

He swallows thickly and averts his gaze. If he keeps looking at you, he’d drown. Like how he drowned freshman, sophomore and junior year.

A continent, couple oceans and a sea away from you couldn’t keep him afloat.

A palpable silence drapes over the two of you. There’s so much he wants to say.

“Who’s is the hot guy birthday girl is talking to?”

“Okkotsu, I think.”

“No WAY. If she doesn’t fuck him i—“

“OKAY!!!” You exclaim loudly, prompting giggles from your sorority sisters behind you.

Your cheeks are now matching his. You both burst into incredulous laughter, letting some of the pressure out of the proverbial valve.

“Give me a tour, birthday girl.” Yuuta grazes his fingers over your bare shoulders because he can’t not touch you.

Your hand magnets to his wrist and you both beeline up the stairs. He knows, you know, -you both know- you are heading straight to your bedroom.

Yuuta’s heart is throbbing so hard his whole rib cage is vibrating. Cotton lines every corner of his mouth and he’s suddenly forgotten how to swallow.

Forgotten how to breathe apparently too, because he chokes on air when you pull him to the front of your room door.

“You’re wearing too many clothes,” you muse playfully.

And now his cock is at full staff. The measly silver zipper is definitely not strong enough for this.

“I-Im sorry?” Yuuta gurgles through the saliva pooled in his mouth like a hungry puppy.

“It’s a pool party, silly. C’mon, you can use my bathroom to change.”

Yuuta makes the mistake of letting his eyes drop down the dip of your pretty spine. Tracing all the way down to your matching bikini bottom. That’s a thong. Lining between your perfect, plump ass.

God.

No.

Stop. Stop. Stop.

He follows behind you, nails digging into his dark jeans.

“Bathroom’s through the closet, be quick.” You flash him another pristine grin and…and..

..what is his name again…?

Yuuta returns your smile with a lopsided one of his own. The walk to the bathroom is 13 miles long. There’s no way. No way he’s going to be able to hide his unreasonable, rock hard length through his weightless swim trunks.

He halts. Suddenly enchanted by your hanging clothes. Like a Venus fly trap. You’re everywhere.

Your clothes. Your delicious scent. Your jewelry. Your shoes.

Yuuta is in the eye of your vortex.

A long, silky sleeve tickles his cheek. So soft. Electric currents surge through every engorged vessel in his cock. He takes in a long drag of the faint cherry vanilla notes etched into your clothes.

An addict. A hopeless, pathetic addict in a field of his vices.

His fingers earthquake against his buckle. Clumsily stepping out of his jeans.

Just a quick touch. It’ll help him relax. Just really fast, you won’t know.

Yuuta whips around to bury himself in your silk shirt. Heart thundering in his ears. Fingers tickling the hem of his trunks. Shaft fully tented from nothing.

“Yuuta? Did you get lost in there?” Your dulcet voice knock Yuuta’s lust-drunk thoughts loose.

“Ha-N-no! I’m c-coming!”

Yuuta shakily unbuttons his white linen shirt, exposing his lean but chisled core. His cock is diamond hard. Any slight movement and his blunt, leaky tip will peek over the hem.

He strategically folds his pants over the indecent bulge. He just has to count backwards from 500 then he’ll soften and leave the jeans behind.

“Come out!! I won’t bite!” You coax again.

The second Yuuta re-emerges from your closet, he digs the heel of his palm into his crotch. Trying to will his erection down by sheer force because counting just won’t do.

You’re sitting on the edge of your bed, leaning against your palms flat on the duvet.

Your bikini has grown smaller.

It has to have.

Because the way your supple tits spill around the cruel joke that is that top fucks his brain to mush.

Soft curvy lines of your breasts. Feminine pretty lines of your tummy. The swell of your thighs just begging for Yuuta’s lips, his hands…his dick. He could drop to his knees and worship at your alter this second.

“Oh my god!” You giggle again, waving him over to the bed.

“You’re so, big, now.” Your hand lingers on his tensed bicep, currently losing the war against his cock angrily thrashing around in his pants.

“Am I?” Yuuta asks stupidly. Long sentences are off the table.

“Mmhm,” he watches your eyes lazily drink in his face. He must be an embarrassing shade of violet at this point.

Your hand makes its way into his hair and Yuuta just couldn’t choke down the “ohh,” that bubbles out of him.

“God, I’ve missed you, Yuuta.” Your face is so soft. So earnest.

And Yuuta is there with you, he swears he is. It’s just, you’re speaking directly to his cock right now and all the blood has drained from his head to his head.

“I mi-missed you. More.” He manages to grunt out, precum pooling on his thigh.

Hold it together. Fucking hold it together.

You turn your body and scoot closer to him. The peaks and valley of your cleavage, tantalizing him into a mindless fool who can only think about fucking his fist.

“Guys here suck. But not you. You’ve always been amazing,” you murmur, circling feather light shapes against Yuuta’s scalp.

He shudders under your touch. Biting his cheeks so his jaw doesn’t hang open. Drool already threatening to leak from his lips.

“So kind and sweet.” Your eyes drop to his lips at the same that your hand falls to his tensed abs.

And Yuuta is caught in your quick sand. His limbs loosen. Hand on his crotch melts away. Allowing his member to spring upward with all the blood he has in his body. The sudden movement causes his jeans to slide to the floor.

His ears and cheeks burn at his indecency. But he can’t move. He is at your complete mercy. His cock rhythmically pumping out his precum now.

“I..” Yuuta croaks, but in one dizzying motion you dive your lips onto his.

He snaps.

Yuuta’s left hand flies to his neglected, weapy shaft. The friction through his thin trunks evoke a deep moan into your mouth. His other hand grips the back of your head, pressing you forward onto his tongue. He didn’t ask for entry into your lips like he normally would. It’s too dire. He’s too needy.

His hand pumps his length while his tongue maps every corner of your warm mouth. You let out soft, high pitched sighs. Which nearly bring him to finish instantly.

“Oh, Yuuta.” You moan his name. And Yuuta’s hips rut harder into his hands.

He’s hoping, praying you’re too distracted by the bruising kiss to notice the pitiful way he’s bucking his hips. Humping his hand. He’s no better than the guys you were talking about. No better.

“OH BIRTHDAY GIRL!!!!!!” Shrill voices from just outside your door rip you two a mile apart.

Yuuta scrambles to his feet, his arm unsuccessfully covering his crotch. You are panting, thumb stroking your bottom lip. Both of you still brimming with your electric chemistry.

“Enough birthday sex!!! Time for TEQUILA!” Your sorority sisters babble and laugh, about 2 seconds away from opening the door.

You grip the handle. Face and body flushed warm rose.

“I-I-uh I have to-“

“Ye—yeah of course, I’ll meet you, down. I’ll meet you down there.”

Both of your voices nervously collide. Looking everywhere but each other’s eyes. You flutter out in haste. Leaving Yuuta in the middle of your room rock hard and a pre cum covered mess.

Like leaving a fiend with an array of illicit substances.

Yuuta turns on his heel and disappears into your closet. He’s not thinking. Logical thought has long ceased to exist. All he can think about is how much his balls ache for you. How drunk he is off your touch. Your taste. Your smell.

His eyes laser down to a crumpled pair of lace panties just a few paces away from your hamper.

Yuuta’s gaze could burn it through the floor.

Stop, Yuuta. Don’t you dare.

He scolds himself. Even though his hands do the opposite. He drops to his knees and pulls his heavy cock free from its barrier. The other hand toying with your worn panties.

He’s filthy. A dirty, nasty scumbag.

Yuuta tugs his cock, aggressively. Jaw hanging open. Short desperate huffs of air escaping his lips.

No, don’t. Stop. “Nnhhgh s-top…fuck..n-no.” His jagged thoughts and jagged words intertwine. Squelching noises from his arousal pierce through his groans.

Yuuta brings your panties to his nose, and nearly blacks out. Your scent. So fucking delicious. So perfect.

He needs to taste.

His groans become garbled when he stuffs your panties into his mouth. Every single nerve ending in his body ruptures.

Yuuta pumps his cock with both hands. Feverish. Sloppy thrusts of his hips colliding with his white knuckled fists. The world around him dampens. Blurs.

“Nnnghh..uhhgh..f-FUCK,”

Your spit-drenched underwear rolls out of his mouth onto his sensitive tip. Ropes, and ropes and ropes of his cum fill your soft négligée.

Yuuta hangs his head back, leaning against his calves. His dick still twitching through his nirvana.

After a few moments, the fog slowly lifts from his mind. His vision returns. Yuuta wipes the remnants of his arousal off his cock with your panties. Before tucking them into his pocket.

Unable to look himself in the eye, he quickly rinses his hands, intending to rejoin your party at once.

But, when his hand connects with the cold knob, a voice in the back of his mind pipes up.

Take another one.

And in a trance-like state, Yuuta rushes back to your closet hamper to find another pair of your panties.

A pretty, delicate red number catches his eyes and he stuffs it into a free pocket before scurrying out of your room.

He’s no better than them.

He’s worse.

PART II

[unclewaynemunson]

If there is one thing Eddie Munson is good at, it's hyperfixating. He can spend hours upon hours wholly entranced by whatever it is that has his attention, whether it's a newly discovered band or a book series he's reading or some random new interest he likes to immerse himself in. It's something Steve, who himself has the attention span of a goldfish, will never really understand, but that's okay: even without understanding it, it's one of the things he loves about Eddie.

Some of Eddie's obsessions fade just as quickly as they appear, but others stay with him for years. So when he reaches a 1000-day streak on Duolingo learning Elvish, Steve has a surprise for him: two tickets for a Lord of the Rings convention in Chicago. The second ticket is not for Steve – they enjoy their own separate interests just fine without the other's involvement – but for Dustin, and the two of them wave goodbye to Steve with a suitcase filled with nerdy costumes and matching excited sparks in their eyes.

Eddie returns a few days later filled with stories about all that he and Dustin got up to.

'Guess who we met at the convention,' is one of the first things he tells Steve. He's bouncing around with excitement, too impatient to even wait for Steve's first guess. 'The guy who created the Elvish Duolingo course! And guess what? He lives in Indianapolis! I'm having lunch with him next week!'

And it's cool, Steve is happy that Eddie met his hero and made a new nerd friend out of him, he truly is – until Eddie shows him the picture that Dustin took of the two of them.

Here's the thing: Steve is not a jealous person. Not at all. He knows that jealousy is a gross thing to feel and he can't even imagine not trusting Eddie. But... he had not expected Eddie's lame nerd idol to have amazing hair, a lip piercing, and muscles in all the right places. The guy looks like a freaking model. And usually, that wouldn't bother Steve – he knows he's not exactly ugly himself – but usually he doesn't have to compete with guys who speak Elvish fluently.

'You should come with me, we can all hang out together,' Eddie suggests. 'I'm sure you'll love him.'

Steve is hesitant about it, but Eddie refuses to take no for an answer, and that's how Steve ends up at Vikram's house for lunch two weeks later.

Eddie gasps loudly when Vikram leads them into his living room, clutching a dramatic hand to his chest in true Eddie fashion. Steve knows it's not all theatrics, though: there's no way a room like this wouldn't genuinely impress Eddie. It's dark and filled with big leather furniture. Framed posters for various metal bands and horror movies hang on the walls. There are shelves filled with big fantasy books, and every corner of the room has a display cabinet filled with what seem to be collectors' items for various series.

If Steve had been hoping for Vikram to look more like a stereotypical nerd in real life, he would be severely disappointed: the guy looks amazing in a leather jacket that would fit perfectly in Eddie's own collection and black skinny jeans that show off a truly amazing pair of legs, making Steve feel oddly self-conscious about the couple of pounds he gained since he left his high school sports days behind him.

While they're having lunch – Vikram bakes his own bread and it's so good that Steve doesn't think he can ever stop eating – Eddie and Vikram enthusiastically talk each other's heads off about all things Tolkien. Steve, on the other hand, grows more quiet as time passes, not really following along and sure as hell not able to give any contributions to the topic at hand.

'Did you ever try to learn some Sindarin as well, Steve? Or are you more of a Quenya guy?' Vikram asks him in what is no doubt a well-meant attempt to include Steve in the conversation.

Steve hastily swallows a big mouthful of bread and feels his cheeks heat up.

'I never read those books,' he sheepishly confesses.

'Oh!' Vikram's eyes widen and Steve can practically see him think: You never bothered to show any interest in one of your boyfriend's favorite things?

'Well, I mean, I tried,' Steve rushes to explain himself. 'But I um, I couldn't really keep my attention to it. They're a bit difficult to read. For me.' Somehow, explaining it only makes him feel worse about it.

'Oh, yeah, I get it, man. Those books aren't for everyone.'

There is no meanness or hidden insult behind his words. But Steve only feels more like an outsider while Eddie asks Vikram some incomprehensible question that has Vikram giving an in-depth explanation about the difference between two words that literally sound the same to Steve's ears. And when Eddie laughs about a joke that goes way over Steve's head, then says something in that stupidly beautiful nerd language which prompts a laugh from Vikram in return, Steve is reminded in full force how ugly of an emotion jealousy is.

They say goodbye – Eddie says something in Elvish again and Steve has to watch Vikram laugh a joyous laugh about it again – and Steve is quiet during the drive back home.

'Is something wrong?' Eddie asks when they're home, perceptive as always.

'No,' Steve lies.

'Stevie, c'mon.' Eddie studies Steve's face intently, a frown between his eyebrows just barely hidden by his bangs. 'What's going on?' Something in his expression shifts. 'Wait. You didn't like Vikram, did you? Did you hate him?'

'No, I didn't hate him!' Steve is quick to say. 'He's awesome, Eddie, he's perfect and smart and funny and perfect.'

Eddie narrows his eyes like Steve said something weird.

'Why did you say he's perfect twice?'

Steve huffs and runs a hand through his hair in a nervous gesture. 'Just drop it, Eddie.'

'No, I'm not dropping it.' Eddie crosses his arms. 'What are you not telling me?'

Steve sighs. 'Okay, I didn't want to bother you with this, because it's my problem and not yours, and jealousy is an ugly emotion, but–'

'You're jealous of Vikram?'

'I mean, he's like, super hot, and he has this cool house, and he loves the same things as you, and you can speak your cool nerd language with him, while I'm too dumb to even read your cool nerd books and–'

'Steve,' Eddie interrupts him. 'You have no reason to be jealous.'

'I just...' Steve pauses, pinches the bridge of his nose. He finally manages to voice the thought that has been eating at him ever since he met Vikram. 'I don't want you to wake up someday and wish that you were with someone as smart as you are.'

The way Eddie's breath catches is barely noticeable. Then, he reaches out and gently places his hands on Steve's shoulders.

'I am with someone as smart as I am,' he says softly.

Steve scoffs.

'No, it's true,' Eddie presses on. 'Okay, so you don't enjoy reading Tolkien, and you don't speak Elvish. I don't care about that, man. I love the way you think. I love your inexhaustible knowledge of weird sports facts. I love how precise you are about weighing ingredients when you're baking something. I love your through-the-roof emotional and social intelligence.' He lifts one hand off of Steve's shoulder to pet his head, almost as if he's some kind of animal. 'You got a pretty big brain in there, no matter what you tell yourself, Stevie. And that's why I love you, more than anyone who speaks Elvish fluently.'

Steve tugs Eddie closer until their bodies are pressed against each other, his arms around Eddie's waist and his head resting on Eddie's shoulder.

'I don't think anyone has ever called me smart before,' he quietly admits.

'Well, I'll do it more often, then,' Eddie replies. 'Cause you are.'

(I wrote this because @undreaming-rambles has reached the unbelievable milestone of a 1000-day duolingo strike today. obviously that called for a silly fanfic celebration moment, congrats on your incredible perseverance aneta 💖 and credit where credit is due: this one was inspired by an episode of my beloved comfort show brooklyn 99)

[grimrester]

i am really so sorry to continue harping on about the watcher entertainment streaming service. but this kind of stuff (internet content as a business & marketing it as such) is truly my obsession, and i think i will implode if i don't talk about some of the takes i'm seeing.

i'd like to emphasize again i don't have strong feelings about watcher either way. i like ghost files, i watch mystery files sometimes, i watched worth it back in the buzzfeed days. i don't watch any of their shows religiously.

anyway, here's the main things i keep seeing crop up and my thoughts on each:

"watcher has 25 employees they have to pay, and employing people in this economy is good, so we should be banding together to pay them."

employing people is good if you currently have the capacity to pay them. i checked watcher's linkedin page, and many of their employees were hired within the last year or two. if they hired people they cannot pay with the business model they had before, something is seriously wrong with their internal bookkeeping/decision making. it means they either didn't know they couldn't pay these people long term, or they did know and were content with risking newly hired employees' livelihoods on a huge content pivot in the next year.

of note is that none of their employees' titles have anything to do with managing the finances of the company. they are the size of a small business but have no one aside from the figureheads of the company in charge of their finances.

this is the kind of company decision making that leads to downsizing and layoffs, which can be devastating. but you know what's worse than laying off a portion of your staff? laying off everyone because your business is going under.

"not everyone can afford the subscription, but those who can should pay it to support the watcher team."

no. $6/month for a couple hours of content (depending on what shows you actively watch and the natural fluctuation of their release schedule) is a fundamentally bad value. i can pay that much for a few movies on amazon. i can pay that much for dropout, if i want to support a smaller business instead.

and to be totally frank, even if people do sign up, i don't think they'd get enough to compete with the amount they get through patreon/sponsorships. and the fact that they didn't know how many of their subscribers would realistically sign up is a bad sign.

a pretty good conversion rate of free to paid subscribers of a service or content is 3% (usually accomplished through a free trial). given the very poor reception of the announcement, let's say about 1% of their 3 mil youtube subs pay for their service. that's 30k people paying for their new platform. that's $180k a month in their pocket.

(they currently only have 12k subs on patreon so we are being generous here.)

a sponsorship deal (based on my googling, i have less direct experience with this) is anywhere from $10-50 per 1000 views. they've gotten about 1 mil views on their last few videos. 3 mil subs is nothing to shake a stick at, but let's say they're on the lower end of the payscale at $25 per 1000 views. that's $25k a video, $100k a month if they release 1 video a week. their lowest patreon tier is 5 bucks, so even if all their subs are at that tier, that's another $60k, so $160k total. it's entirely likely they're bringing in much more than that when you factor in merch, adsence, etc.

did anyone on their team crunch numbers on how many people would need to sub to make the switch worth it? did anyone do market research on how many people they could convert to paid users? because if not, if they really didn't have a game plan for this, the subscription service was always doomed to fail.

"this was their only option to continue making the content they want to make, with the production value they want."

i watched their announcement video. a key point in that video is that they have done sponsored videos and that's what used to pay for their content, but they did not like the amount of creative control the sponsor had over the content.

look, i get that's no fun. we'd all love creatives to be able to make whatever they want. but when you are a small business with a team of employees relying on you, you have to think about making money, sometimes at the cost of creative liberties.

and they had so many other options to make money for the projects they want to make without jumping to a subscription platform.

they could have started actually promoting their patreon, and maybe done some restructuring of the tiers. why not a highly produced, special series just for patreon members? or a special high-budget episode of each series, while the main series is lower budget?

bite the bullet and continue taking sponsorship deals on some less-produced shows, while axing sponsorships from the ones the crew feels more passionate about.

schedule larger, blowout-production shows only when they can be afforded. this is what Notorious Amongus Guy streamer jerma does. he saves up for big productions like his baseball or dollhouse streams, so he can really get creative with them.

they had other options and they've tried very little, especially when you compare them to other content house business at similar scales. try guys and good mythical morning both put out significant content with significant staff, and have had to diversify their income streams with auxiliary products, shows with widely varied levels of production, etc. but it seems to be working for them. watcher has merch and that's about it, and seems to only want to increase the production quality of ALL their shows.

really, all this just boils down to a terrible business decision. it's hard to say if the watcher team is working with a consultant or anyone outside of their team, but they certainly don't have anyone internally who is experienced with running a business like this. to me, it seems very much like they got in a room together and did some extremely optimistic income ballparking with no research behind it.

and that might have been fine for three dudes running a channel alone, but if they're a business, they have to start making decisions like one.

[leovenuslatina]

𝓓𝓞 𝓜𝓔 ୧ ‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡ PT.2

⊹

!!! this reading is 18+ ONLY !!! ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

part 2 in the “do me” series yay !! this reading is about: Your FS favorite thing about having sex with you 💗 ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈•

thank you for having so much patience 2/3 this series is almost done !!

ᰔ

₊˚⊹ ᰔ౨ৎ₊this is just a reminder that tarot isn’t permanent or set in stone YOU decide how your life goes no one or nothing else now take a deep breath and choose the pile that calls to you ₊˚⊹ ᰔ౨ৎ₊˚⊹

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pile one - ace of wands , ten of cups

🧿

pile one ur FS is such a perv when it come to you lmao !! their favorite thing about having sex with you is literally you ! the way you look and smell and your body is like a work of art to them you’re literally so so hot to them. during sex you’ll just catch them staring deep in into your eyes and he’s just lost in the mf sauce so deep in love and literally shocked that a hottie like you loves having sex with them. i’m getting that even though the two of you have been married or been together for a long time he’ll still feel like he scored BIG TIME. like he’s in high school and he’s like a nerd loser or something and you’re the hot popular girl and he literally can’t believe you’re interested in him. even when you’re not having sex they constantly he’s always look at you for validation that he��s making you feel good and not uncomfortable but also because you’re just sooo pretty he loves watching you. your FS LOVES watching you get dressed and he hates when you kick him out so you can change because like i said he views you as art would you keep people from seeing the mona lisa? so why keep him from the masterpiece that is you? Your FS loves having sex with you because you’re the most passionate lover he’s ever had i think it’s because your connection w your FS IS SOOO STRONG that it makes everything you two do in the bedroom 1000 times better.

⊹

extra messages- pregnancy, excitement, faster speed, high energy, spontaneous, fairytales coming true

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pile two - four of wands, ace of swords

☁️

Pile 2 your FS gives me subby vibes. they love to care for you that’s their favorite thing about having sex with you is taking care of your needs he likes knowing you depend on him to feel good. during your sex they love when you tell them what to do to you. Your FS is like a puppy just waiting for your next instructions on how to best make you happy. your FS favorite thing about doing you is how much stronger it makes your connection of course it makes you two closer but something spiritual happens to them when you’re in bed together it’s like you’re his own personal slice of heaven. idk why i’m getting he proposed during sex like he just blurted it out he was mid stroke in you and was like “please marry me” or he just decided he wanted to marry you while having sex with you he realized you’re just too much of a catch and the two of you are just too sexually compatible to not make you his forever!!! when your FS is having sex with you he feels it calms him that’s why i think this pile is my soulmate twin flame pile because i just keep getting a strong spiritual healing sense. another thing your FS LOVESSSSSSSS your dirty talk either one or both of you love to talk dirty but i think you more than them like it and they are in love with hoe filthy you whisper in their ear it makes them almost cum on their pants you know exactly what to saw to make them feel something.

⊹

extra messages: acts of service, mind reading, stability, celebrations, commitment, protection, dominant/domination, work, frustrations

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pile three - wheel of fortune, nine of cups

🌸

your FS loves that you’re innocent but in the private of your own bedroom you’re a freaky ass. it’s very unexpected for him but he loves that the more he gets to know you the more you surprise him and that just makes you that much more attractive to him. i think like pile two your FS feels a very deep connection to you like he manifested himself to be with you 🥹 that’s so sweet. Your FS LOVES how risky your sex seems ??? i’m getting one or both of you have like super dark kinks and your FS loves that they never know what to expect from you it turns them on so so much they have never been with someone as adventurous as you it makes them feel like they’re on top of the world. even if you don’t see yourself as kinky now Pile 3 im seeing by the time you and your FS start having sex you will be confident enough to explore all facets of your sexuality your FS may even have a lot to do with how confident you feel in indulging yourself in kinky ways 😉.

⊹

extra messages- cycles, the universe has a plan, lucky, things going well, value yourself, emotional fulfillment, pride

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[mattyriddlesbitch]

Headcanons of the boys while you're pregnant bc my hormones are crazy and want me to get pregnant again so I'm doing this instead.

My period hit an hour after writing this so that explains it.

Draco Malfoy

Stressed omg. Like he wants everything to be perfect

Will hire help when he's away at work just so you don't have to do anything. Cleaning? Maid. Cooking? Personal chef. Even a chauffeur

I, for some reason, feel like he'd handle your mood swings the best. Always so calm, no matter if you're crying, yelling, or stressed.

1000% helping with the nesting period. You're ready to set up the nursery, he's with you, picking out things and setting it up. Will also hire someone to do a cute mural on one wall.

Lowkey will cry by himself when you're sleeping about how happy he is that he's having a baby with you. Like will sneak off to the nursery, sit in the rocking/gliding chair with the ultrasound and smile as tears fall.

Will buy all the types of ultrasounds at one of those places that does it. Normal, 3d, video, getting a recording of the heartbeat(even putting it in a bear). Anything and everything.

Tom Riddle

I'm gonna be honest, I don't think he'd be the best. Like at least not emotionally.

I do feel like he'd get 10x more protective though.

Won't let you leave the house without him. What if something happened to you?

Will help you with everything physically. Like will help with building things for the nursery and doing anything tedious so you don't strain yourself.

Will make sure you don't eat any junk food. Always on top of your prenatals. Making sure you're eating 3 square meals a day and will make sure none of it is food you will puke, making sure if you do puke from the food, you never eat it again.

But when it comes to your mood swings, I don't see him being any more gentle with you than normal. Will probably just remind you it's pregnancy hormones and that everything's okay, but that's about it.

Mattheo Riddle

Doesn't know what to do. Panicked at every new thing happening to you.

Will go to every appointment and ask a million questions every time to the doctor.

Does find your pregnancy cravings amusing and will try them with you, even the gross combos. Will also try to get them for you, no matter the time of day.

Almost like Tom in the protective part, like not letting you leave without him or someone else.

Tries so hard with your mood swings. He doesn't understand how to calm you down. He understands it's pregnancy hormones, but doesn't understand how you're crying over a dog video and doesn't know how to calm you down.

Will not let you do anything for the nursery other than pick out items. Will bring a comfy chair in the room or set up the rocking/gliding chair first so you can sit in it and tell him how you want everything, where you want everything placed, all that.

Blaise Zabini

The best. Omg. He's already so sweet, and this will just turn him into the sweetest boy ever.

Already buying matching outfits for all of you the day you tell him you're pregnant. Also buys you the cutest maternity clothes, you're almost disappointed when they don't fit anymore after the baby.

Loves indulging in your cravings. Even if it means getting up at 2am to go get ice cream because you want this specific ice cream, not what we have in the freezer.

Will talk to the bump at night so baby will recognize his voice. Also loves feeling the kicks. Also buying a doppler so you two can hear the heartbeat whenever you'd like.

Didn't understand the nesting period at first, like why are you cleaning and stressed about getting everything ready? We still have two months. Once he learns, he is off his ass and helping with everything.

Also like Tom with the meals and prenatals, but doesn't mind junk food. Just tries to get you to eat healthier food first, but baby's in charge here, he knows if baby doesn't want it, you're not eating it and would rather have you eat cheetos and candy than nothing.

Lorenzo Berkshire

Cries when you tell him you're pregnant, partly from happiness, partly from 'holy shit we're gonna be parents'. Cries when he sees the ultrasound too.

So doting. Asking every 5 minutes if you need anything, water, a snack, a massage, cuddles?

Handles your mood swings pretty well. He just wants to find out what the problem is. How can he fix it? Hugs? Cuddles? Kisses? You wanna go get some treats or snacks or food?

Obsessed with your bump. Paying for the top top top maternity photographer so he has high quality pics forever. Buying cute maternity clothes that show off your bump.

Will let you help with small things for the nursery, like putting up decorations on the shelves and wall and rug just so you can feel like you helped without doing anything too tedious.

Will get you a pregnancy pillow but gets so jealous of it when he realizes it's pretty much impossible to cuddle you with it. 'Am I not comfortable enough?' Glares at the pillow when you're not looking like it's a real person.

Theodore Nott

Smiling like an idiot when you tell him. Hugging you so tight, he's nearly crushing you.

Already like your personal chef, but he's researching the best meals for pregnant women and making them for you. Lowkey almost feels insulted if you throw any of them up but has to remind himself it's not you or him, but the baby. Will whisper to your bump when your sleeping too about 'how dare they? that was excellent food?'

Speaking of, is big on talking to the baby, like he'll come home and lay or sit down with you and talk to the baby about his day. Not even directed at you and if you make a comment, he'll jokingly say smth like 'hey, I'm talking to the baby, not you.'

As soon as you get the furniture for the nursery, he's setting it up. You don't even have to ask and it's most likely done without you knowing. Like you'll walk into the nursery and all the furniture is ready to go, you just need to decorate and rearrange.

Will have a shelf dedicated to yours and his old baby stuff too, just so there's a little part of you two with the baby always.

Finds your mood swings funny and tries not to smile, but you can tell and it makes it worse. 'cara mia, why are you crying? it's just a commercial.' He'll say, but wrap his arms around you anyways to comfort you.

Taglist:

@jeannie-beannie @yourenogoodforme @mixvchelle @helendeath @evaslytherpuff

@soaked4abby @hpnsfwaddict @mayamonroem @motherfing-stargirl @brittney-121

@dracoslovergirl @littlemadamred @mattheoriddlesbitch @acornacreacure @opheliamalfoy236

@demieyesore

Let me know if you wanna be added!