#I think a big part was just never going on tiktok?
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does anyone know whats going on in the TOH fandom over on tiktok. im looking at my shipping data again and I fear I will need to go over there and investigate myself
#ive never made a tiktok i really dont want to tiktok is like. i hate it#BUT. but but but. i think a lot of infighting and drama happens on tiktok because tiktok makes people lose braincells and pick stupid fight#and like. thats a pretty integral part of my research#tumblr is chill but i think its a completely diffferent section of fandom then tiktok#not that stupid fights dont happen on tumblr. they absolutely do but#i just wanna know like. whats it like over there... who's the big toh creators... whats all the big drama....#tiktok scary i dont wanna go myself :(#would be nice to get my survey over there. id like to revamp it first but#theres a section i DESPERATELY wanna change to Not Suck. because its shit#its gonna fuck up my dtaat if i change it but OUGHHHHH#i also wanna add a question like “how did you find this survey” bc then like. difference in response between tumblr/reddit/etc#i also need to investigate twitter but thats even more inhospitable so like. eh. i know bluesky is a thing but like. who knows#im just tryig to figrue out my thoughts#i have 68 responses rn they have been useful. but thr survey Sucks and could be designed way better#oh well#lilac post#toh#the owl house
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Continuation.
Bakugo Katsuki swore that he would die before he let you have Izuku's number.
And yet, somehow, the three of you have ended up together for drinks.
He thinks it's a fair compromise; Izuku can ask his million questions, Bakugo can kill the rumors that the two of you are together, you can-
He's not sure what your goal is, but he can see it shining in your eyes.
Izuku is still in his teaching clothes, a pristine button up rolled up to the elbows and a pressed pair of pants. There's an extra shine and coil to his curly hair, and it smells like sandalwood; he put effort into his appearance and Bakugo knows it isn't for him.
Your words echo in the back of his mind: people always want what they can't have.
"You worked for the commission? As a hero?" Izuku asks you.
You never give direct answers- just these convenient truths delivered with a pretty smile.
"I'm retired."
Lipstick clings to the rim of your drink. It makes your lips looks soft and round, even when you run your tongue across your teeth.
"Retired?" Izuku asks. "Wow, I'm kind of jealous."
"She's my social media manager." Bakugo cuts in. "And a tiktok person."
Not his girlfriend, he wants to add, but he refrains.
"Kacchan says you have a cool quirk." Izuku talks without pause, rambling mostly to himself in that way Katsuku has taught himself to find endearing. His attention never wanes away from you, but you don't blush or squirm. You sit and endure with that damn smile on your face. "What is it called? How does it work? I tried to Google it, but nothing comes up. You are so young to be retired, I just-"
You lean forward and place a hand on Izuku's upper thigh, cutting him off midsentence.
"You have very beautiful eyes," you say, slow, stepping gently over every word. "Wide, wet: like a rabbit's."
Izuku snaps silent. Each one of your nails taps against his thigh, one by one. Bakugo watches how your thumb swipes side to side, how your lips part with your exhale, how your smile creeps up all on its own as you lean even closer-
"You twitch like one too."
"Oh, wow, uh-" Izuku stutters, his whole face flushing a dark pink, so strong it eats his freckles. Finally, someone else understands your goddammit issues. Bakugo swallows down the strange feeling in his chest with the last dregs of his beer.
"I'm going to get a drink, I think." Izuku stands, pulling away from your touch.
"Grab me a beer?" Katsuki shakes his empty can. Izuku nods, then looks at you.
"Soda water with lime."
"No alcohol?"
"I like to keep my wits about me."
The man nods, then practically scurries off to the bar. You huff, content, like a dog that's bought it's master their hunt.
"You scared the fuck outta him."
"He liked it." You pick a piece of lint off of your skirt. "They always do. Watch: he'll come back and sit even closer to me."
Bakugo throws himself back into his seat, arms crossed. "You're so damn cocky."
"Look who's talking, Kacchan." You tilt your head, pouting your lips with fake sincerity. "I can call you that, right? As your girlfriend?"
He sinks even lower in his chair. "You aren't my girlfriend."
"I could be." You mimic him. You lean back and let your knees spread just a bit, just enough that he could see what under if he tried- "The sex would be phenomenal."
That hits him like a shot. It's not that he wants to have sex with you, but he can't deny that the thought crosses his mind every now and again. He thinks about it when he's alone, when the bed feels too big, when he's-
"You don't fucking know that!" He's too angry already, especially compared to your nonplussed response.
"I do.'
"You don't even fucking know me." He points a finger back at you. "And I don't know anything about you."
"It's better if you don't know."
Bakugo sneers. Another nonanswer. He looks back towards Izuku, who's locked in conversation with the bartender. Why would you even bother with him? Someone like you would rip through him like tissue paper. You're right- he is a rabbit, and you're a dog, waiting with your sharp teeth to-
A hand cups his ear. Bakugo watches as you lean in over the table, bringing your lips to his ear.
"I grew up in the commission. One of their little project kids," you whisper. Sometimes, your lips make contact with cartilage and his skin sparks with heat. "I did things for them. Bad things. Illegal things."
"You kill people?" he whispers back.
"You know the answer to that." With every word, you creep closer, until your hands are on his thighs now. "They forced me to retire when Hawks took over. No more need for girls with bloody hands."
It's the truth. Your voice is painfully sincere for once, a strange change from your usual composed self. You're just giving him what he wants, but it's working. It's working. He almost puts his hand around your waist.
If Izuku is a rabbit, he's a fox, and you've lured him out of his fucking burrow. At this point, he'd welcome your teeth in his neck.
"What else should I tell you? My favorite color's red, I love the beach. You're not allowed to pull my hair, I never sleep over after sex," you continue. "I have a scar on my chest. So, you're not surprised when you see it later."
"Stop assuming that I'm going to fuck you."
"Oh, you're going to." You slink back over to your seat. Hands folded over your lap- a snake ready to strike. "I'm going to flirt with Izuku until you break-"
You turn your attention away from him, waving towards the approaching Izuku. "And then you're gonna fuck my brains out, Kacchan."
There's no time to respond before Izuku teeters back, blaming three drinks with a little difficulty. He hands then out, then sits back down-
So close to you that his thigh brushes yours.
"Thank you, little rabbit," you tease, eyes flicking back to Bakugo with a knowing, smug smile.
Fuck, Bakugo thinks. Fuck.
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It really is that damn phone (a rant)
(written nov 18th, 2024)
I was in my bed-rotting, depressed, don’t know what to do with my life nor do I care era up until this morning. And I’m starting to think it’s the people around me bc as soon as I’m not at work, I’m suddenly the most productive person ever.
I’ve been on a mission to become that dream version of myself (which for me requires some physical effort on my part) and shifting and I realized- wait the diff between the dream ver of myself and my dr self only have like slight physical differences. But overall, same mindset, same boundaries, standards & morals. Same person on the inside.
So I thought why make a big deal out of this stuff? Why make a big deal out of being in your dr physically. Stay with me now. Like I try to think of things to do and how to behave and react to stay aligned with my desired self which.. I think I try too hard and it ultimately burns me out. So then I have no discipline to continue- just little sparks of motivation every once in a while.
I’ve realized I feel most at peace when I let things flow without trying too hard. Like when I journal or have inner monologues, sometimes I think—why not shift my awareness to my DR? And suddenly, it feels so natural. Lately, I’ve been focusing on just moving my awareness there instead of worrying about proof or the physical. It’s really just about letting myself tune in, no overthinking needed. Of course, this can still be tricky sometimes (I get sidetracked a lot), but that’s exactly why I started this blog—to explore and share the process as I go.
Anyways, back to the title. It’s that damn phone. THIS IS WHY I SAY GET HOBBIES. I came off Tumblr—I’m not on it as much as I used to be. I queue up my posts when I find something I want to share, then I just focus on me. That’s why I love meditation. Because meditation can be anything. What I just said about inner monologues? You don’t even have to call that meditation—I don’t, most of the time. It’s just about shifting your awareness, and that can happen in a moment. No need for a long process. Just a shift in focus, and suddenly, you’re right where you want to be. I only recently started to grasp that actually.
My last shifting attempt. I’m gonna put the video for what I did and I felt soo close to my dr (the one I had back then) and like it just in reach of my fingertips until it wasn’t. I panicked I freaked out, I lost all hope and inspiration and I had no discipline because I thought “oh shit what do I gotta do now? Do I have to do something now? How do I do this more? How do I get this feeling more? Like what.. what to do… um shit..” and I never got close to that dr ever again. And I hate methods so.. imagine how shocked I felt.
Shaysplanett on TikTok (@shaysplanet)
And then I never tried again, yk why? We get comfortable, we get distracted by the 3D and suddenly we’re forgetting we have desires and we wanna shift to different places
I used to hate reblogging a lot of LOA posts at a time because this community is just things we already know repeated over and over and over again. I also thought to myself.. hm.. what could I post (loa-related) on this blog? And I couldn’t come up with shit. Because it’s nothing new. Law of assumption is nothing new. It’s just recycled shit over and over put in different, pretty words so more people would understand it properly but I think we understand and we’re just not applying. But yet here I am making this post: saying what we know already (and I probably will keep doing that bc it’s how I remind myself)
yeah.
All of this to say what we’ve all heard a million times before: you don’t wanna be thinking too hard about your desire and then end up being consumed by negative thoughts of not having your desire. The more time you spend scrolling and reading about loa and shifting, the most pressure you put on yourself and you miss the one thing you have to do: change your assumption/move your awareness. If you come to the point that you’re spiraling, STOP. Take a breath. Remind yourself that everything is going to be great. Do something else.
(posting this bc i plan to actually take a break from tumblr and finally listen to myself. if you see posts, its bc they're queued. hopefully i actually take the break this time. ps i think im starting to move away from looking at shifting solely from a loa standpoint)
#cherubofthenight#divine feminine energy#loassumption#loa#law of assumption#affirmations#loa rant#shifting#shifting blog#reality shifting#shifting community#shifting motivation#shiftblr#loablr#divider by fairytopea
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Wax
Summary: You tell your boyfriend you got waxed by a man…
Eren x Black Fem Reader SMUT
"Eren!" you called out as you entered his room. he looked up at you with his low red eyes making your heart skip a beat. you were already regretting your decision but you were going to power through. you gave him a little twirl, "notice anything different?"
you saw a trend on TikTok where girls would tell their boyfriends they got a wax done and you wanted to try it. you hesitated knowing Eren he could flip but your friends convinced you to do it.
Eren's eyes trailed over your body stopping at your ass that hung out of your miniskirt. "that ass getting fatter ma? shittt i've been feeding you good." he said as he licked his lips before making eye contact.
you turned around to look at it in the mirror. "i've been hitting the gym with Mikasa and Annie. i ain't even noticed the gains."
"cmere lemme touch it." Eren took a hit off his blunt motioning for you to come sit on his lap. if you didn't actually get a wax today you would've sat on something else. but it was now or never.
you walked over to Eren not missing the way his eyes watched as you purposely swayed your hips. "no, I got waxed." you said placing your foot on his lap.
"you’re so smooth." Eren started rubbing all up on your leg. "everywhere?" he asked as he trailed his hand up higher looking you in the eye.
"baby oil and cocoa butter, love." you said before giving him a nod. a smile graced Eren's lips as he pulled you down so you were straddling him.
"we can't do anything for at least 24 hrs…" you whined out onto his shoulder. "but that's not the point." you said as you shot up. you moved to the bed to create some space between you two, Eren rolled his eyes.
he picked up his phone but signaled to you that he was still listening.
"so I went to get a brazilian today and my regular lady wasn't there so they gave me someone else and honestly, i like them a bit more. they were getting all in there, like really in there and it didn't hurt as much. plus the guy was so ni-" Eren's head shot up.
"hold on ma, did you just say a 'guy?'" he put down his phone and looked into your wide eyes with his red ones.
"y-yea he did a great job…" the wall behind Eren suddenly became very interesting to look at.
"nah, i don't think i'm hearing you right." Eren sat up in his chair with his jaw clenched. "a man waxed you?”
"yes."
"you let a man touch you down there? see you naked."
"it's his job Eren."
"nah you pissing me off right now ma. you let another man touch your pussy and you telling me you're fine with it?" eren moved so he could look deep into your eyes causing you to flinch. you could see his anger building up and it frightened you.
he was always so quick to anger, especially around Jean, you can't say how many times they got physical. but he's never yelled at you much less put his hands on you but you didn't know what he would do now. he was unsettlingly quiet. you only nodded afraid you would get on your knees and beg him for forgiveness but a small part of you wanted to push him even further.
Eren surprised you as he started laughing, he rubbed his tattooed hand all over his face looking at you through his fingers. "you expect me to believe you let a man wax when you still get so shy when I say 'pussy'."
you looked away from him, if your skin was any lighter he would've been able to see you blush. "well he said I had the prettiest 'pussy' he ever saw. gave me his number to hit him up if my boyfriend didn't satisfy me enough." you were shy but you weren’t a pushover.
Eren took a big hit off his blunt before blowing the smoke in your face."ass up, face down ma." you quickly regretted your words.
"Eren wait-"
“ass up. face down. now!" Eren's never talked to you like that, he was always so sweet and nice to you. but right now he was so demanding, it was kinda hot.
you quickly moved to position, making sure your back had a nice arch in it before looking back at Eren with a pout. "Eren we can't…"
"mmhm." he mumbled ignoring your eyes. he pushed up your skirt and delivered a slap to your clothed heat.
"Eren!" you cried out in shock, you shoved your face into the sheets in embarrassment. you've never done this before. you and Eren were vanilla so far because you were a virgin up till a few weeks ago. this was something new and you kinda liked it.
"head up ma, you had a lot to say right? said you'd fuck your waxer cause i wasn't good enough?" he said grabbing your butterfly locs. they were about a week old so they weren't as tight but his grip still hurt. but you were coming to understand that you liked a little bit of pain. "lemme hear it."
eren planted a firm slap against your ass. "ah! It hurts!” Eren gave you another hard slap causing you to jerk forward. you heard him kiss his teeth before you were pulled down to the end of the bed.
“this not gon work.” he said as he maneuvered you so you were bent over his lap. “you keep lying to me, ‘s like you trying to get me mad on purpose ma. you like it when I’m angry?” Eren asked as he delivered another slap to your bare ass. your dark skin was starting to bruise.
how’d he know? you weren’t that bad of a liar. “i was the one who set up and paid for your appointments ma, they would’ve told me if there was a change.” oh, right. you brought your hands to cover your face in embarrassment.
“m sorry” you whispered.
“if you really got waxed by a man, i can’t tell you what would’ve happened.” Eren let out a bitter laugh looking at his dresser. it brought your attention to the gun Eren kept tucked in his pants when he went out. he always placed it in his top draw when he came home not wanting you to see it but you knew about it. it made you shiver thinking about him using it on someone. “but don’t worry you’ll be sorry. count to 10.”
“10 wha- ow!” Eren raised his hand high and brought it down on your ass making you jump. you reached back to grab his hand but he just slapped it away
“you run, lose count or complain and you start over from one.” he spanked you again watching as your ass rippled. you let out whine, you weren’t used to Eren being so mean to you but you were soaked. each slap sent a new wave of tingles to your core.
“how many are we at now baby?” Eren asked in that sweet voice he always spoke to you in.
“9.” you sobbed out. you don’t even know when you started crying and whether it was from the pain or the neglect of your core.
“think you can take one more?” despite being so mad at you it made your heart swell at how nice he was still being. he messaged your ass while waiting for the answer.
“yea…” he delivered one more slap but he directed it toward your clothed heat, fingers coming in contact with your clit, “ohhh fuckkk!” your body started to convulse as you felt pure bliss.
“fuck ma… did you just come from me spanking you?” Eren breathlessly asked as he placed you beside him, you winced at the contact. you nodded as you hid your face in his shoulder. “that’s my good girl.”
#aot x black reader#x black reader#anime smut#aot smut#aot x reader#aot#eren yeager#eren x reader#eren aot#eren smut#eren x black reader#eren x black y/n#black y/n#black reader smut
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fatherhood looks good on you | george russell social media au
pairing: george russell x fem albon reader
there comes a point in the relationship where you take it to the next level
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
- part of the brother's best friend series -
yourusername
liked by alexalbon, landonorris and 783,409 others
tagged: georgerussell63
yourusername: looking so good i want to give you a baby
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user1: WHAT
user2: we really be saying anything on the internet these days
alexalbon: SHUT THE FUCK UP THE LITERAL ONLY RULE OF THIS RELATIONSHIP WAS THAT YOU KEEP THIS SHIT TO YOURSELVES
yourusername: gosh a girl can't have baby fever in peace these days
alexalbon: unless that baby is coming by stork you can put that talk on hold real fast
yourusername: just because lily is busy does not mean you have to take it out on me and george
georgerussell63: alex is it illegal for a man to be handsome?
alexalbon: if it's illegal to be handsome, you'd have the cleanest record known to man
yourusername: STOP RIGHT THERE DIDN'T YOU KNOW THAT LYING IS A SIN
alexalbon: i'm not going to say YOUR boyfriend is hot, no.
yourusername: just because i got in there first 🙄
user3: i don't think she's serious but also george with a baby is just too cute not to happen
user4: george is the perf instagram boyf like he's so ready to pose
landonorris: well that definitely is something we all want to know
yourusername: i know you would LOVE to know ALL the details norris
georgerussell63: she's never going to let your crush go lando, you gotta just hold it
landonorris: i was THIRTEEN
yourusername: you don't love me anymore? 😕
landonorris: i don't know why i always get in these arguments with you
user5: i love how george just instigates things for y/n lmao
user6: your boyfriend should always support your mess
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georgerussell63
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georgerussell63: fatherhood is a different beast
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user8: alright i am so confused
user9: there's no way y/n can actually be pregnant i saw her down at least three pornstar martinis in hospitality this weekend
alexalbon: this better be a joke or i'm gonna kick you so hard you get a free non-reversible vasectomy
yourusername: stop the violence!
alexalbon: THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR GLEE REFERENCES
yourusername: someone is channelling some serious sue vibes right now
georgerussell63: let it be known i like my reproductive systems the way they are
alexalbon: that's kind of the point of a threat, you aren't supposed to want it
yourusername: he likes threats if they come from the right person
alexalbon: i am about one more comment away from knocking down your hotel room door and throwing george from the balcony
yourusername: and deprive our child from a father... alex i expected better from you
alexalbon: that's it i'm on my way
georgerussell63: @mercedesamgf1 PLEASE PROTECT ME I AM PRECIOUS CARGO
user10: these bitches got me actually combing through tiktoks and hospitality menus to see if y/n was actually drinking
user11: i'm gonna be real angry if this is all a big joke
user12: i know kimi antonelli is young but this is NAWT the way to announce him for 2025
charles_leclerc: guys i need you to spell everything out i am confused
georgerussell63: no can do charles you gotta follow the breadcrumbs just like everyone else
yourusername: it's right there sharl
charles_leclerc: actually alex, wait, i'm coming with you these hoes are annoying me
landonorris: don't forget me
yourusername
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tagged: georgerussell63
yourusername: our baby is here!
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user15: A CAT?
user16: i just knew george russell would be a ragdoll girl
georgerussell63: they were right i AM a girl dad
yourusername: finally dilf status
georgerussell63: a title i do not take lightly
yourusername: i can confirm libido has gone UP since becoming parents!
landonorris: shut THE FUCK UP
yourusername: you'll understand in time lando
georgerussell63: you just found yourself at the bottom of the babysitting list
landonorris: i don't want to look after it
yourusername: IT? IT? HOW DARE YOU?
georgerussell63: she can hear you lando that's so disrespectful :(
landonorris: ??? i'm not saying sorry to a cat over instagram comment
georgerussell63: expect the same courtesy when i take you out first corner next weekend
user17: i fear that was not a threat but a promise from george
user18: it's kinda hot
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alexalbon: NEW ALBON PETS LORE AND NONE OF YOU TOLD ME
yourusername: ella can't wait to meet the gang
alexalbon: no offence but ella is kinda a shit name
yourusername: short for mozzarella
alexalbon: i take it back
georgerussell63: cause she's the lil pearl of our life
alexalbon: i love her already
user19: so we went through all this tomfoolery for a cat? a cat called mozzarella?
user20: you have to agree it's iconic
alexalbon
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alexalbon: i knew @albon_pets would get george at some point
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user22: i love how alex became the chill guy again after it was revealed he was not yet an uncle
georgerussell63: hard on the yet
alexalbon: too soon george
user23: the albon pets signature of approval is a bigger sign that george is in the gamily than if he actually proposed to y/n
user24: they've got a baby now he's an albon
yourusername: horsey is going to kick off over having to share george with me and mozzie
albon_pets: bring it on - horsey
yourusername: alex i'm not arguing with you pretending to be horsey, this ain't roscoe and lewis
lewishamilton: rude
roscoelovescoco: meanie
yourusername: did you just call me mean as your dog?
lewishamilton: you were extra mean
yourusername: fine lets let mozzie and roscoe scrap it out at silverstone - she's got the sass of both me and george btw x
lewishamilton: stay AWAY FROM MY DOG
user25: the merc garage gonna be a whole petting zoo at silverstone i can't
user26: you wanna catch up with red bull? sell meet and greet tickets to the petting zoo
maxverstappen1: this is my official invitation to a play date with jimmy and sassy
yourusername: WE'LL BE THERE
maxverstappen1: is mozzarella civilised?
georgerussell63: of course my child has manners?
maxverstappen1: you crash into people all the time, i had to check
georgerussell63
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georgerussell63: all of the family here for the home race
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user27: y/n wearing mozzarella in a baby harness i need to be put down
user28: that really is their child oh my
yourusername: make our baby proud georgie
georgerussell63: anything for you two xx
alexalbon: why do i never get these nice comments
yourusername: they're transmitted through our genes x
yourusername: also george more important 👍🏻
alexalbon: i'm literally your brother? your flesh and blood?
yourusername: george cuter
georgerussell63: can't argue with that
alexalbon: well of course he is this ain't alabama. (sorry logan)
logansargent: i'm from florida?
yourusername: even worse, my condolences
georgerussell63: can we get back to talking about how dashing i am?
yourusername: yes!
alexalbon: NO. SAY GOOD LUCK Y/N
yourusername: good luck y/n
alexalbon: what if i crash and you never said good luck, think about it y/n
yourusername: good luck alex (you're an asshole for weaponising the sport (and you being shit at it))
user29: i think i had about three strokes trying to follow this argument
user30: poor logan is just a victim of the albons at this point
landonorris: have a baby and forget about the rest of us, i see how it is
yourusername: you will never measure up to mozzie lando i hope you know that
georgerussell63: what y/n means is that i love my friends, but a child is a gift from god
landonorris: it's a cat. she can't even talk
yourusername: and yet she makes better points than you, makes you think
yourusername
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yourusername: fatherhood looks good on you
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user31: mozzarella is so big already 🥹
user32: maybe i'm worse than them cause i'm attached to mozzie as well
georgerussell63: no one else i'd rather be cat parents to
yourusername: you're such a romantic
georgerussll63: such a pleasure to take this next step with the love of my life
yourusername: i love you more
georgerussell63: not possible
alexalbon: you being gross about mozzie was better than what ever the fuck this is
yourusername: @lilymunhe does he not treat you right?
lilymunhe: he's a romantic really, he's just exhausting the protective big brother act until george finally proposes
alexalbon: sue me
maxverstappen1: still waiting on the play date ...
yourusername: monaco?
maxverstappen1: done
yourusername: jimmy, sassy and ella will be like the charlie's angles reincarnated
georgerussell63: can't wait for you to see her IMPECCABLE manners
maxverstappen1: okay princess george
yourusername: hey only i can call george princess
maxverstappen1: you keep that to yourself
user33: disappointed that with all the tomfoolery around mozzie that there was no maternity photoshoots
yourusername: oh do not give me a challenge...
fin.
note: NEW SERIES ALERT? i'll create a masterlist after i post this. i hope you enjoyed, this one is more of a tame brother's best friend take but dw they can get more beefy and more sassy - send me any pairings you might like to see! thanks for reading x
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1 social media au#f1#george russell instagram au#george russel imagine#george russel x reader#george russell#george russell imagine#george russell x reader#george russell fluff
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Tom meeting reader at an event and he’s just flirting the whole night and ends up getting her number
i watched the golden globes and got inspired to write this! i hope you like it <3
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
If there was an award for "most nervous person in attendance" at the Golden Globes, you'd have won it by now.
Award shows never failed to make your stomach feel in knots the entire time, specially when you were nominated, like tonight.
The Great had been a huge breakout role, a period drama that had captivated audiences and critics. Now, you stood among the nominees for Female Actor in a Television Series – Musical or Comedy at the Golden Globes, and you could feel your heart pounding as the moment of your category being announced approached.
"Love, are you okay?" you heard a voice calling for you, turning your head you realized that it was Dua (yes, the Dua Lipa) who was sitting next to you.
"Just a bit nervous," you told her with a small smile, "I think I'll head backstage for a minute, I need a breather."
She assured you with another smile and you made your way backstage, a commercial break started just on cue.
You had rehearsed your acceptance speech a dozen times in case you won, and also had a pep talk ready in case you didn't, yet the nerves persisted. You knew you were competing against some big names, and whatever the result people online would have something to say.
Your train of thought was interrupted by your body colliding with someone, almost dropping your clutch in the process.
"Whoa there, careful," a voice chuckled, catching your arm.
"Sorry, I didn't see where I was going," you said, your cheeks flushing from embarrassment, of course you'd run into someone in classic romcom cliche style.
"No harm done. You alright?" he grinned and you recognized him, it was the man who had been flooding your Tiktok for you page for the past month, Tom Blyth, "I'm Tom, by the way."
"Nice to meet you, I'm YN," you smiled back, "And yeah, I'm okay. Just a bit nervous about my category. Oh you're presenting it, aren't you?"
"I'll have the privilege, yes," his charm effortlessly showed, "And just so you know, I'm rooting for you. You were phenomenal in The Great, one of my favorite shows I watched last year."
Your nerves seemed to ease a bit, his presence and charm making you relax. There was something about him that felt comforting, even though it was your first time meeting him.
"Thank you, that's really nice," you smiled at him, "But I don't want to get too confident, the other nominees are just as great."
"Honestly, I'd bet my hat you're taking that Golden Globe home tonight."
Tom squeezed your arm gently and you smiled again, and before another word could be exchanged, a crew member's voice echoed through the backstage area announcing that the show was back from commercial break in 30 seconds.
"Well, looks like it's showtime" Tom glanced towards the exit, then back at you. "Knock 'em dead out there, YN. You got this."
"We'll see."
With a final wink sent your way, you parted ways. You returned to your seat and tried to enjoy the ceremony as much as you could, your nerves still in the back of your head but your interaction with Tom making you feel more at ease now.
"And now, presenting the award for Female Actor in a Television Series – Musical or Comedy, please welcome The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes star, Tom Blyth!"
You heard the host say and you knew t was time, and once again a wave of nerves and uncertainty filled your body.
The crowd erupted in applause as Tom stepped onto the stage, his confidence and charm shinning through.
"Good evening, everyone. It's an honor to be here tonight among such incredible talents," Tom smiled, "Here are the nominees for Female Actor in a Television Series, Musical or Comedy."
A video played showing all the nominees but you felt like your mind was numb, you didn't even realize it had ended until Tom's voice was heard again.
"And the Golden Globe goes to," he paused for suspense, and you could see a small smirk making its way to his face as he read the name, "YN!"
Time seemed to freeze, you tried to process everything as you heard the applause from the crowd and those around you congratulating you and before you knew it, you were on stage taking the award from Tom's hands and giving him a quick hug.
"I told you." He quietly whispered in your ear and gave you a wink, a moment that the cameras had caught.
You gave your speech, thanking your cast mates, directors, family, friends and the rest of the nominees. Once you were done you headed backstage with a proud smile and your newest award in hand.
The night went on and you definitely enjoyed every minute of it, mingling with other actors and thanking everyone who approached to congratulate you.
Once the ceremony wrapped up, you headed to the after party, you were sipping on a fruity drink by the bar when you felt a presence behind you.
"Hey, can I steal a moment with the newest Golden Globe winner?"
You turned around noticing it was Tom, he had changed to a different suit and you couldn't help but think that he looked really handsome.
"Sure, what do you need, president Snow?" you laughed, feeling a newfound confidence around him.
"How about your number? I'd hate to lose touch with Hollywood's latest sensation." Tom flashed his charming smile again, taking you by surprise and making your entire body feel giddy.
"Smooth, Blyth. Very smooth." Blushing furiously, you playfully rolled your eyes.
"Well, when you really really want something, smooth comes naturally."
And just like that, after winning a major award for your career and feeling on top of the world, you found herself exchanging numbers with Tom Blyth, excited to see where that would take you.
#tom blyth x reader#tom blyth fanfiction#tom blyth imagine#tom blyth blurb#tom blyth x you#tom blyth fake instagram#tom blyth social media au#coriolanus snow#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus snow fanfiction#tom blyth fic#harrysfolklore#tom blyth fluff#tom blyth smut#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#coriolanus snow smut#social media au#tom blyth au#1k#2k
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idk if you accept requests but i badly want to read the blue lock boys with the orange peel theory going around on tiktok 🥹
notes: anon, i was in a slump and then you come with this, please know i cant get it out of my mine for 2 whole nights. so, please have this, i hope u will enjoy it & your fave is there. also shoutout to @doobea for helping me with rin & barou esp <3 aso for standing my yappings. warning: none, post canon au in mind, reader's gender unspecified.
character: isagi, kaiser, bachira, chigiri, nagi, reo, rin, sae, barou + bonus
isagi
sweet boy will do it with a smile. is not the tidiest but you can now eat your orange while sharing with him. has a vibe that he is sort of used to doing this somehow. a total win still. if you do the same for him he will get flustered. also asking this is one of the quickest ways to get mr. egoist switches to mr. sweetheart boyfriend.
“Eh, why are peeling one too? I already… for me…?…I, uh—I see. Thanks… I—I am… give me a second.”
kaiser
you are the one who will peel for him—unless you throw a fuss and give him a silent treatment because this guy's pride is no joke. he can, he just doesn't want to. but to appease you and gain back his rightful spoiling, he will. afterward, at least, he learns his lesson and when you are about to peel one yourself, will take it and peel it beautifully for you like a second nature.
“…the fuck are you staring at? Just take it. You are about to eat it anyway, right? Then what's the big deal?”
bachira
yes, he will no question asked but is it worth it. probably will make a mess out of his energy. you will be laughing along with him somehow though so it is worth it. having the sunshine doing anything in front of you is a guaranteed smile-inducing routine. as for the orange, please do switch to other alternatives, for example: kisses, as suggested by him.
“Isn't this better than orange? Huum, huum! More healthy, sweeter too, right? Another one?”
chigiri
depending on his mood, you will either get a very cute orange peel or a half-peeled orange (at best) you have to finish peeling yourself. on the former, you get a smug bf who will feed you like it's a pocky stick. on the latter, you better be the one feeding him while hugging and cuddling him. multitask somehow. also, give him kisses because he is called a ‘princess’ for a reason.
“Ah, being in your arms being fed like this… yeah, yeah. I know don't worry. I will repay the favor.”
nagi
realistically, you will be the one peeling it for him and forcing him to eat one. because why would he even touch one? he is too lazy for that, nothing personal. but, let's say he really, really loves you: he still won't, he will just give you orange-flavored jelly in replacement. it does come from a place of love though, he genuinely thinks it's less troublesome to eat and, hence: better.
“Eating that is troublesome. It taste the same too. We can also do it while kissing. Mouth to mouth. Better right?”
reo
normally, will get a servant to peel it for you and him. though: can he do it? will he do it if it must be him? no question asked, absolutely will, all while chatting and staring at you with so much love. totally mr. k-drama male lead. you and your premium orange are in good hands.
“Oh, man, you are sometimes really …huh? Nah, I mean, I like doing this. It's just now I feel like I have to do this every time, so… yeah.”
rin
the first time, he will click his tongue and mess up. he will crush the orange. better never speak of it again, just know he loves you wholly despite everything. then a week passes and suddenly you will get a professional competitive orange peeler part-timer. without asking. just eat your orange. unless you are sick of it or it makes you actually sick.
“Did the orange taste good? … good. Nothing. You just look… nevermind. Do you want another one?”
sae
will he or will you. realistically, no? there are two possible reasons: 1) he can't. his whole stat is in soccer. 2) “you can't?” aka is it worth it getting judged by him. in case #2 though, just act cute and aim for his soft spot for you, he will fold and peel it with you pressed to his arm. he will grumble or glare but that's just itoshi-esque tsundere.
“You can't do something like this yourself? This will be the only time I’m doing this… Also who told you to move away?”
barou
our king. will peel the skin and the white fiber for you. tidy peels and if you know your way around his heart—you do just smile or blink and he is gone—he will also feed you. 10/10 execution no notes. probably will do this in kotatsu, dinner tables, and other domestic settings that are not bed while being a tsundere.
“I’m doing this just so you don't make a mess, got it? Also, scoot closer, your leg is kicking me—what do you mean I’m lying?!”
bonus
kunigami will, both before and after wc because you are his world. the difference would be in his expression only and there is that because his love for you would never change. shidou will but genuinely, please just peel it yourself. aiku will, not without teasing you though. gagamaru will either will or teach you how to eat the skin too. zantetsu wants to do it, but it will be really messy so please just don't. hiori will do it like a sweet boy, but if he is in his sadistic mood he will tease you for a bit before finally feeding you.
#bllk imagines#bllk x reader#bllk#blue lock#blue lock fluff#blue lock x reader#blue lock scenarios#bllk fluff#blue lock imagines#bllk scenarios#bllk headcanons#blue lock headcanons#isagi x reader#kaiser x reader#sae x reader#chigiri x reader#rin x reader#bachira x reader#barou x reader#nagi x reader#reo x reader#did i nearly lost the prompt? yes. but i did have fun. if anon also have fun it will be enough for me#i wrote this one in bed like a madman. after cooling down i can only think how it was fun. i hope i did it right#anon this is scheduled. if this makes you happy press isagi pic to gimme spirit. however all in all i hope u r happy
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🌜I know you better than anyone🌛
pairing: five hargreeves x female reader
summary: it’s been a long time since you last saw Five. due to your nieces’s birthday party, you’re forced to face him again. you can’t help but be surprised when instead of being met with hate, you realize the only thing he wants to do is help you.
genre: angst with a happy ending!
warnings: manipulation? cursing perhaps. nothing major
word count: 4k
notes: this is a little bit based on the gilmore girls scene in which jess confronts rory for dropping out of yale. i saw someone use that audio for a tiktok pov and wrote this. here’s the link to that.
It had been twenty minutes already. Two cars had tried to take your spot during that time and you’d had to awkwardly let them know that you were not leaving. You tried to do a couple of breathing exercises you vaguely remembered Klaus teaching you at some point, but this was something that could not be solved by just taking a few deep breaths in and out. After a couple more minutes had gone by, you decided it was time to put on your big girl pants and get the evening over with.
You got out of your car and opened up the trunk to pull out the gift. Needing both hands to carry it, you struggled a little bit to get it inside. The sound of screaming children filled up your ears, and you could not think of a worse place to be at right now. You spotted a few familiar faces and decided to make your way over there. After having taken a few steps, you tripped over a plastic ball from the ball pit you’d failed to notice and began stumbling as you tried to regain your balance. Mentally having prepared for the fall, you were surprised when it never came. Instead, a firm pair of hands managed to catch you, one of them holding you by the back of your head and the other pressing against the lower part of your back.
“You okay there?” He asked.
You’d known he would be here, but you certainly did not expect him to be the first person you encountered at your niece’s birthday party.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.” The uncomfortable silence was soon to settle in, and you had to fight back the urge to run back to your car.
Luckily, your attention was caught by the birthday girl herself sprinting towards you after noticing you had arrived.
“Auntie!” Grace yelled, her arms open waiting for you to hug her. You got down on your knees after setting the gift next to a nearby table and embraced the little girl tightly.
“Happy Birthday, Gracie,” you spoke next to the girl’s ear, kissing the top of her head before standing back up to retrieve the big box.
“Is that for me?” she inquired excitedly as her eyes rested upon the gift.
“Of course it’s for you! I think you’re gonna like it a lot.” You winked at her.
“Do you want some help taking it over to the gifts table?” The man who’d saved you from falling asked.
Before you had the chance to answer, Grace seemed to realize something and interrupted you.
“Look Uncle Five, she’s here!” You were a little confused by the statement, given that Five had been standing there the whole time, so it was obvious he knew you were there. However, you figured your niece was just excited about your presence and wanted everybody to know about it.
“Yes Grace, I see her.” Five replied. Based on his tone and demeanor you would’ve guessed he was embarrassed by the situation. But that didn’t make any sense to you.
The little girl turned to you and signaled for you to get on your knees again. Following suit, she cupped her hands and held them to her mouth before getting closer to your ear.
“Uncle Five was asking about you a lot before you got here,” she whispered. Your eyes instantly went to meet Five’s, and by the look on his face you could tell he had some idea of what Grace was telling you.
“I uhm, I’m gonna go get a soda,” he said before walking away. You felt utterly confused by his attitude, not understanding why he was acting the way he was. Why had he been asking about you? Based on the last time you two saw each other, his current actions were nonsensical.
Puzzled but not really being able to do much about the situation, you hugged the little girl once more and went over to the gifts table to leave the heavy box you had been carrying. From behind you, you recognized the voice of the reason why you were even here in the first place.
“That better not be another one of those loud ass toys that lights up and blasts up annoying music.”
You turned around and smiled at the man before you.
“No, this one just barks and shits.”
You enjoyed watching as the color got drained from his face by your response.
“You didn’t,” he said, more of a threat than anything else. You laughed, giving yourself away.
“No, I didn’t. Lila said no dogs. She doesn’t wanna be juggling three kids and a puppy.”
Diego let out a sigh of relief, “Good, I did not want to have that fight today.” He gave you a smile and a quick hug to welcome you.
“It’s been a while,” he said.
“It hasn’t been that long, we saw each other for the twins' recital.” You knew he didn’t mean it as a personal attack, but you couldn’t help but feel bad by what he’d said. You tried to be there as much as possible for your family, but things were different now.
“Yeah, that was two months ago!” He laughed, but you knew he didn’t find the situation funny, he was just trying not to come off too harshly.
“I’m sorry.” You shrugged.
He noticed the hint of sadness in your eyes and his own expression softened.
“It’s fine, I wish we saw each other more often but we all understand.” You chuckled a little at his lie. Certainly they didn’t all understand.
“You have no idea how much I wish that were true.” You were both quiet for a minute, mutual understanding flowing between the two.
“His hair’s gotten longer,” you spoke, breaking the silence.
“Yeah, he’s become more of an asshole also.” You both laughed. Diego moved closer to you and gave you a half hug.
“It’s going to be fine. Give it time and you’ll see.” You closed your eyes and let yourself give into his embrace. You doubted time would be able to solve anything, but it didn’t hurt to hope.
…
You didn’t speak to Five again for the rest of the evening. You’d caught him looking at you from a distance a couple of times, but you hadn’t been able to look at him back. After cake, you made the round of goodbyes and left the building before he got the idea of speaking to you. Back in the safety of your car, the tears came rolling down your face before you could do anything to stop them. The memories of your last encounter with Five came flooding back, and all of those times you had repressed them only worked to make them stronger now.
You had just gotten out of the shower, which you had cut short after the hot water had run out. You got dressed quickly and cursed at yourself for choosing such a cheap place to stay at. It would not surprise you to find all kinds of stains if you were to use a UV light in this room. Repulsed by the thought, you grabbed your toothbrush with the intention of cleaning your teeth when you heard a loud persistent knock on the door. You were reluctant to open up at first, but when the knocking didn’t stop, you figured it was the only way to get them to stop knocking.
Grabbing one of your knives, you made your way to the door and through the peephole noticed who the person on the other end was. You unlocked the entrance and allowed him to come inside.
He looked agitated, his brows furrowed in a prominent frown. His hair was all over the place, drastically different to how it usually looked.
“So, you weren’t going to tell me that you were leaving?” Of course you hadn’t told him, you knew this was exactly what he would’ve done if you’d told him.
“I knew you would try to stop me,” you spoke softly, not wanting him to get any more agitated than he already was.
“What kind of idiotic response is that? Of course I would’ve tried to stop you.” His words stung.
“I can’t do this right now, Five. I’ve already made up my mind and I’m at peace with my choice.” You tried to sound as convincing as possible.
“It’s a stupid decision you’re making and I’m not gonna stand here and let you make it.”
“It’s already done, there’s nothing I can do about it,” you felt your voice getting weaker, but you didn’t want to break in front of him.
“Of course there is, I’ll help you get out of it. I’ve done it before.” He didn’t understand any of it, and he could certainly not fix it either.
“Five…” you began.
“Look, I know you, I know you better than anyone. This isn’t you.” Of course he was right, but you couldn’t admit that to him. Instead, you chose to remain quiet.
“What are you doing? Living at this cheap motel, working for The Commission, leaving us behind- why did you leave me behind?” He looked away, not being able to hold your gaze at the moment. You knew that what had hurt him the most is that you hadn’t told him you were leaving. You hadn’t come to him to let him know you were going back to the place you both had tried so hard to escape from in the first place.
“It’s.. complicated,” you said.
“It’s not! It’s not complicated,” he yelled.
“You don’t know!” You wished you could explain it all to him, but he couldn’t know the truth.
“This isn’t you! This- you going back to working for The Handler. We did the impossible to get away from her.”
“She’s not the same woman she once was…” You tried to defend her, not even believing it yourself.
He ran his hand through his hair with anger, frustrated by your answers.
“This isn’t about her, screw her! What’s going on with you? This isn’t you, you know it isn’t. What’s going on?” He walked closer to you, watching you intensely.
“I don’t know,” you admitted.
“Come home. To hell with all of this! Just- just come home.” He took your hands in his, silently pleading with you.
Knowing there was only one way out of this, you decided you had to do this in order to keep him and the rest safe.
“Home? What exactly is home? This is your family you keep talking about, not mine. The Handler is the one who took me in and gave me a place to live when no one else would. Grow up Five! You think this is how I wanna spend the rest of my days? In this fucked up timeline where we don’t even have our powers? No way I’m staying here, so I would appreciate it if you stopped claiming to know better than me and left me alone for once.” You broke your hands free from his hold and walked to the entrance to hold the door open for him. He hesitated for a few moments before following you to the door.
“So what? You and I- none of it matters anymore? You’re just choosing to throw it all away?”
“This has nothing to do with us, nothing to do with you. I can’t always put you above everything else.” Knowing that was exactly what you were doing was the worst part of this.
“I always have,” he said, sounding defeated.
“Well I guess that’s the difference between you and I.” You put the last nail on the coffin.
With that, Five left the room and stood in the hall.
“When you regret this, and you will regret this, don’t come crawling back to me or my family,” he said before walking away. Based on his words, you knew you’d managed to hurt him a great deal. He was not going to come back now, which both relieved you and made you want to crawl into your bed and cry for hours on end.
That was the last time you had seen Five before today.
A couple of years after The Handler had taken Lila in, she found you under similar circumstances and chose to raise you as well. The two of you grew up as sisters, carrying out all sorts of missions for the woman you learnt to call mother. Soon, your power began showing and you realized you had been blessed with time control, which came in handy as it meant you didn’t need to use a briefcase for your line of work. One day, you’d chosen to visit the world post-apocalypse, something you knew your mother would never approve of. As you walked through the ruins of what used to be planet Earth, you noticed there was someone else here with you. At first, you thought it must be someone from The Commission, as any other answer was simply not possible. However, upon closer inspection, you realized he wasn’t someone who you’d seen before. That was the first time you’d met Five, and after almost being shot by him, you managed to strike a conversation with him. Soon, you two became close, and after a couple of times of visiting him, you decided to bring him back to the headquarters, risking your mother’s rage.
She wasn’t thrilled about it at first, and threatened you in multiple ways after finding out what you had done. But after watching Five successfully accomplish his first mission, she allowed him to stay. When you’d met him, he’d confessed to having spent six years already surviving on his own, and you could only imagine how much longer he would’ve spent there if you hadn’t found him.
He also told you about his family and how he wished he could get back to them, which is how he slowly began convincing you to help him out. It wasn’t easy, as you hadn’t been on board with the idea in the beginning, but after working together and earning each other’s trust, you had agreed to help him.
You sneaked out one day and left alongside Five to get him back to his family. That was the first time they failed to stop the apocalypse. The second time, Lila was involved, and after getting over her initial anger at you for leaving her behind, she joined you and the others.
You thought you had managed to leave the life you had once led behind. That you were safe now with Five and your newly found family. However, you were proven wrong when one day, The Handler appeared inside your own home, sitting on your couch.
“Long time no see.” Her voice made your blood go ice cold.
“What are you doing here?” You asked.
“Is that the proper way to greet your mother?”
“What do you want?” You insisted.
“You didn’t think I would seriously allow you to walk out with two of my best agents, now did you? I would’ve thought I raised you to be smarter than that.” You knew at that moment that whatever this was, it wasn’t going to end well for you.
“I didn’t take anyone with me, they chose to leave on their own.” You clenched your fists, ready for whatever was about to go down.
“Well, in that case then I think I’ll just go then. Thanks for clearing that up.” She stood up and prepared to leave, but you knew it was not going to be this easy. Right on cue, she turned towards you and spoke again.
“Before I leave though, I thought you should know I have agents right now placed all over to take shots at that precious little family of yours.” Your jaw clenched.
“I don’t believe you.”
She smiled at you, “That is up to you, sweetheart, but do you really want to risk baby Grace taking a shot to the head because her aunt didn’t do anything to protect her?” You wanted to strangle her, but you knew that wasn’t going to fix anything.
“What do you want?” You asked for a second time.
She faked thinking about it for a second, as if she didn’t already know exactly what she wanted from you.
“I want you to come back to work for me. I want you to do it today without telling anyone, especially that little special friend of yours.”
“Who? Five?” You didn’t like that she was paying special attention to him during this conversation.
“Bingo! You speak a word of this to him and he gets a bullet in the brain. And now that he doesn’t seem to have his powers anymore, don’t think he’s gonna be able to get out of this unharmed.” You felt shivers run down your whole body at the thought.
“What do you even gain from this? I can’t even travel through time anymore, I’m useless to you without my powers.” You didn’t understand why she’d want you back specifically. Both Lila and Five were far more skilled than you.
“You need to learn there are consequences to your own actions. This is your consequence.” You could hear the satisfaction in her voice.
“There’s a briefcase waiting for you at this address. Don’t be late, your first assignment is tomorrow morning.” She handed you a piece of paper you shoved into your pocket, knowing there was no way out of this. Maybe, if you all had your powers, you could figure out a solution, but in the state you were all in, the only way to keep everybody safe was to do what The Handler wanted you to do. You could already feel your heart breaking, hating her even more for doing this to you.
…
You jumped when you heard a knock on the window of your car, being too lost in thought to notice someone had been approaching you. You quickly wiped your tears with the back of your hand and tried to look presentable before rolling down the window.
“You left without having any cake.” Five was standing outside your car, two paper plates with servings of chocolate cake on them.
“I needed to get back to work,” you lied, hoping he would leave you alone.
“Well, I’ve been watching you sit in your car ever since you left so I’m not buying that.” Of course he’d been watching you cry pathetically all this time.
“Open up?” he requested. Knowing that he wasn’t going to leave until he got what he wanted, you unlocked the doors and allowed him to get into the passenger seat. He handed you one of the plates and you rested it on your lap, knowing you weren’t going to be able to eat it without making yourself sick given the situation you were in.
“You’ve been avoiding me,” he blurted out. You opened up your mouth to deny it but he beat you to it.
“Don’t try to deny it. For the past year everytime you find out I’m gonna be somewhere you suddenly have to cancel. Happened with Claire’s science fair, happened with Luther’s barbeque and it happened with Grace’s play,” he listed. Of course he was right, but you weren’t going to admit that to him.
“I’ve just been very busy,” you said.
“Why didn’t you want to see me?” His question took you by surprise. You thought that after your last conversation he was the one that wouldn't want to see you again.
“I think it’s best if we keep our distance from one another.”
He looked taken aback, hurt, even. Great, you were causing even more damage now.
“Best? Best for who? You or me?”
“You said not to come back looking for you.” You didn’t want to throw in his face the words he’d spoken in a moment of anger, but you needed an excuse to get out of this.
“You and I both know I didn’t mean any of that. I was angry that you were choosing to leave, but I didn’t want things to end up like this. I’m sorry.” He stared at his plate, toying with the fork. You could only imagine he couldn’t stomach taking a bite as well.
“Things are complicated, Five. This is how they need to be.”
“Then explain them to me. I’m not an idiot, I know you’re doing this under some sort of manipulation from The Handler, I just can’t figure out what she has on you that made you go back.” He stopped staring at his cake to shift his gaze towards your face. He looked broken, almost as broken as you.
“I can’t- I can’t tell you anything.” You knew that by saying that you were admitting to not doing things freely, but you hoped it would be enough to get him to understand your motives.
“Whatever it is, I can help. You need to trust me.”
“How will you help me? What would you do if she sent people here to kill you? How are you going to defend yourself?” You were growing more agitated.
“Is that what this is about? She’s threatened to hurt me?” You stayed quiet, giving him the confirmation that he needed.
“I can take care of myself, or are you forgetting that I managed to survive years on my own in a post-apocalyptic world? None of that had anything to do with my powers. I understand that you’re scared, but that’s what we’re here for.”
He always oversimplified things. Made it seem as if you were the one exaggerating, as if he could just make everything better.
“Maybe you can take care of yourself, but what about the kids? What about Klaus? Have you seen him lately?”
He chuckled at your words, lightening up the mood.
“Okay, maybe you’re right, but you should’ve come to me first with all of this. I’ve been taking care of my family for years, and will continue to do so considering how stupid they constantly prove to be.”
It was your turn to chuckle now.
“I promise you we’ll figure something out together. Key word being together.” He took one of your hands in his.
“I’m not gonna let you continue to deal with this on your own.” He looked determined to keep his promise, which is why you allowed yourself to feel a glimmer of hope.
“If something were to happen to any of them, then it would be on me,” you said, staring at your lap in shame.
He used his free hand to cup your cheek and force you to look at him.
“Nothing’s going to happen. We’ve survived worse. And if something were to happen, it wouldn’t be your fault. None of this is your fault,” he reassured you.
“Please trust me, love,” he said, the nickname slipping out, taking you back to better times, easier times.
“I really want to,” you admitted, tears welling up in your eyes.
“Then do.” He moved closer to you, letting go of your hand to grab your face with both of his hands. He put his forehead to yours and allowed you to stay like that for a second.
“I don’t think I can tolerate losing you a second time,” he whispered against your lips.
“You won’t,” you whispered back.
Soon, his lips were against yours, falling back into routine as if nothing had happened between you two. One of his hands moved to your waist, tightening his grip on you. The kiss turned more intense as he began moving with more force, showing you how much he’d missed you. Your hand got lost in his hair, enjoying the new length. He pulled away and smiled against your lips.
“I missed you so much,” he said. You shared the feeling, regretting how you’d chosen to handle things. There was a lot at stake, a lot you needed to figure out, but what mattered is that you would do that together. No matter what happened from now on, you had each other to fall back onto.
#five hargreaves x reader#tua five#five x reader#five fanfic#five hargreeves#five hargreeves x you#five hargreeves angst#five hargreeves fanfiction#the umbrella academy 4#the umbrella academy
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Never Have I Ever | Jake Sim
౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪"you sure you a virgin, baby?"
synopsis: You play a game called 'Never Have I Ever' a popular TV show with a cute boy named Jake in hopes of finding your true love. During the game, he figures out some cute things about you.
Your a... virgin?
warnings: protected sex,(FINALLY, I MADE IT HAPPEN), kissing, biting, make-outs, jake and y/n are famous but not k-pop way (like tiktokers or smth), you really trust each other, pet names ?, little degrading, and size kink scattered everywhere if u squint <3, mature topic and jokes, y/n is a virgin but she like INexperienced, you get me?
{☆} I don't like this so i might delete it if you guys don't like it.🤷🏽♀️
As you impatiently settled into your seat, the camera set pulled a thumbs-up. Your heart was racing with anticipation, and you couldn't wait for the show to begin. You felt the cameras flash and suddenly, your attention was diverted as a tall, handsome boy entered the room. His smile was infectious, and you feel drawn to him. As he walked over to his seat, you found yourself stealing glances in his direction.
"Hey, I'm Jake", he says and sticks out his veiny hands for a handshake. You smile and extend your hand, introducing yourself as "y/n". His hands are big and pretty compared to yours, which are small and neatly painted. His hands feel warm and soft as you shake them.
You were each given cards with questions to ask each other. If a question was too personal, the person would take a shot of a strong drink instead. The hope was that these shots would lead to revealing secrets unintentionally.
Which wasn't needed for you two.
#take 1
It has been about 20 minutes into the game, and you and Jake are really getting along[!]
It seems like you two connected straight away and wouldn't stop trying to make the other one blush. You even managed to sneak a hand under his thigh and caught him looking a bit too long, down your chest.
#take 2
"Never have I ever had a wet dream about someone I liked" he puts his hand on his chin, pretending to think. He writes on his board 'Not yet' and you question him.
"I'm probably going to have some about you tonight", he bites his lip, surprising you with his words. You cover your face, which is turning bright red, with your hands. Now it's his turn to laugh at you.
'ok last question !'
You squeal silently in your seat, kicking your feet as you start speaking again. "Never have I ever had proper sex" you laugh as if you don't know the answer.
"Well, I have" he sits up from his seat, cocking a brow as if he was asking you something "have you?".
Your face slightly burns up as you look down "No.."
Oh, he found you so cute, almost popped a boner. You were just so perfect, short, tiny, pretty, adorable, and most importantly, a virgin.
His teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he watched you have a moment of shock.
The room lit up with bright lights as 'victory' music played. You guys had won the game, and you were awarded the title of the cutest couple on the show.
You were both stood up, and you looked at him as he intertwined ur fingers slowly walking off the set.
౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪
Oh, flip. You are having your first date with Jake, and you're trembling, not confident like you always are. You have gotten your nails done with French tips, and it's making it worse, as you can't get a stand of hair pulled back.
You curse to yourself, about to throw a tantrum while rushing to find a hairbrush, but it's okay; y/n always wins in the end.
You let out a loud huff as you looked at yourself again, practising different smiles for when you see him. Finally, you leave your house, enter your Uber, and reach the café in under 10 minutes.
I couldn't finish it right now, but obviously..
part 2?
(ill tag you if you reblog and comment!)
#enha x reader#enhypen#enhyphen hard thoughts#enhyphen x reader#enhypen smut#enhypen heeseung#jake smut#jake x reader#enhyphen jake#jake sim smut#enhypen jake#jake fluff#sim jaeyun#enhyphen
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I know Halloweens over, but Im still getting the horror nights videos on my tiktok and now Im imaging a haunter house AU where Ghost pins reader as part of the haunted house and she just blushes the brightest eyes, her eyes dilating and filling with lust as she lets out an almost pornographic moan. Its enough to throw Ghost and the rest of the guys of their game because theyve never had that response before, that reader is able to slip away and disppear from their room. But now they're all dead set on finding her again after the haunt, swapping out with other actors and going to find her so they can have some fun
All i can think about is reader not even knowing they even have that kink in the first place 😭 imagine you go to a haunted house for the fun, or maybe your friends said it’ll be fun and it’s your first time- and only realize how much you like the thrill of being hunted down while being chased.
And then also realize that you like being pinned, too. The monster- a big, big man with a ghost mask and a fake knife had been the one chasing you and you knew he was going slower on you but your clumsiness had reared its end and now you-
His hand wraps around your neck; not really touching your skin, but simply keeping you in place while he looms over you.
The moan you let out surprises both of you. You freeze. He freezes, but in all honesty? You don’t regret it. You don’t think you’ve ever been more turned on in your life than right now, pinned like this after being chased.
Still, it’s embarrassing. You will never live this down, but he’s distracted enough so you take this chance to run away, face warm and panties sopping anyways.
And Simon? Already on his way to track you down and tell the others about you. No way he’s about to let you slip away after this lovely revelation.
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dating jason grace would include
• the chivalry radiating off this man is CRAZYY.
• he’s constantly opening doors for you and giving you his hoodie without hesitation.
• after you guys start dating, you’ve never touched a single door handle (that includes car door handles).
• like this man will literally push you back into the car if you try to get out.
• the way he covers the corner of a table with his hand when you bend down!!! (i need me a man like jason fr).
• also, FORGET about getting your own gas too. jason has it covered.
• if you’ve read it in a romance novel, jason has thought of it.
• you know that one tiktok trend where one person tries to switch foods/drinks with their partner? yeah if you ask him he will not hesitate to switch with you. he also shares his food with you with no complaints.
• but he also knows you well enough to get you something to eat even if you say you don't want anything or that say that you're not hungry.
• jason LOVES resting his forehead against yours. it brings so much comfort when when you touch your heads together and close your eyes, being so aware of each other.
• i feel like he radiates a mixture of golden retriever boyfriend and doberman boyfriend.
• he’s VERY protective of you. on and off the battlefield. catching you in his arms when you trip on something or using his body as a human shield to shield you from anything that could harm you.
• he knows you can take care of yourself but he still likes to look out for you. he’s a chronic worrier.
• he is pretty romantic and enjoys meticulously planning dates for you both, such as movie dates, picnics, hiking, and more.
• however, most of your time together is spent working together and training.
• one of his love languages is acts of service. whether it's helping you with chores, surprising you with breakfast in bed, or offering a shoulder to lean on when you're having a bad day, he's always there to support them in any way he can.
• HIM LETTING YOU WEAR HIS GLASSES>>>
• he thinks it’s adorable when you wear them (it also kind of turns him on).
• he's 100% a morning person (due to his militaristic upbringing at camp jupiter). if you're also a morning person, the two of you enjoy going on morning jogs together.
• if you're not a morning person, he'll spend hours admiring you when you're sleeping (not in a creepy or weird way lmao).
• he LOVES coming home to you after a long day to simply melt in your arms. there’s just something so soothing about cuddling with you after a busy day.
• the way you softly run your fingers through his hair as you ask him about his day (it has him giggling and kicking his feet fr).
• tell me why he already has a ring picked out for you? like he definitely didn’t buy it after your first date.
• he's a big reader but sticks with audiobooks (due to his dyslexia) and will read every single book that you read so that he can talk with you about them.
• TRACING HIS LIP SCAR WHEN YOU’RE BORED>>>
• you’re constantly teasing him and making fun of him for it. like who would try to eat a stapler?
• your feet rarely ever touch the ground when you’re with him. this man is always carrying you bridal style and flying you everywhere.
• jason is very patient, he will wait, fight and do whatever is needed for the relationship. even if it means sacrificing his own feelings for yours, he would do it.
• he trusts you to take care of yourself, but he will make sure that he does his part in taking care of you too. <33
#percy jackson and the olympians#heroes of olympus#pjo#hoo#pjo hoo toa#pjo fandom#hoo fandom#pjo series#hoo series#pjo x reader#pjo tv show#pjo disney+#jason grace#jason grace fanfiction#jason grace x reader#jason grace x you#jason grace imagine#jason grace smut
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START AN ARGUMENT || alessia russo
this is my first time writing in a really long time so if there are any mistakes i apologise! but if you have any questions or requests please send them!
navigation
"lessi c'mere now, please!" you say as she walks into the kitchen, clad in a long oversized white t-shirt and shorts her hair still wet signalling that she had just gotten out of the shower.
a look of suspicion on her face at you stood in front of your phone. "what are you up to?" she giggled coming near to your phone which was propped up against your heart shaped mug which you had made at a pottery date with the blonde a few months ago. the blonde stopping at the corner of the kitchen counter, eyes narrowed as the mischievous look on your face.
"no c’mere" you repeat pulling her arm into the frame of the camera. "i want to start an argument." you say, letting go of the blondes arm and folding your arms to cover your check as your voice was laced with seriousness.
"why?" the blonde asks her eyes narrowing, not being able to tell if you were being serious or if this was part of the reason why you were recording. "is this another one of your silly tiktok things?" she asked but you pretended you hadn't heard her ask the question.
you cleared you voice, picking up the piece of paper which you had written your questions down on. "alessia russo, if i, your girlfriend - ran away would you get with someone else?" you ask, an element of shock appearing on alessia's face. she wasn't sure what you were going to ask but that definitely wasn't on her list of things.
"no never, i love you" she says with a smile thinking she's got the answer right. "what would you do?" you ask, still with a straight face.
"i would be single and lonely and become a mum to your many jelly cats" alessia says again with a slight smile, looking at the camera which is recording the whole moment.
"incorrect." you say bluntly.
"what, so i would be with someone else?"
"no. if i ran away you would come and find me and you would not stop until you had found me, got it?" you say as if that was the most obvious answer she could have said.
"oh, loud and clear!" the blonde says breaking into another fit of laughter not being able to take this whole serious persona you had adopted the past few minutes.
"if you were blindfolded, and had to kiss 50 women including me. would you guess it was me and if so, how?" you say reading of the peice of paper before giving your girlfriend a deep stare.
"of course i would be able to tell which is you, cause you always poke your tongue-" alessia began but didn't have a chance to finish as you cut her off.
"incorrect!"
"why!"
"you shouldn't want to kiss fifty other women to guess which one is me!" you say, shaking your head in false disapproval. "why would you want to kiss 49 other women?"
"i wouldn't!" alessia says in a pleading tone, as she drags her hands down her face in frustration.
"good, now next one, who is always right in this relationship?" you say knowing exactly what she's going to say which is the furthest from the truth.
"right, okay let's be fair-" alessia begins as you side eye her your eyebrows raising a little, "who is always right in this relationship" you repeat the question emphasis on the word right.
"me"
"incorrect!"
alessia begins to laugh as she knows that's wasn't the correct answer, "that's so incorrect." you say still in your total seriousness persona. "i know, but i never get to be right" the blonde adds with a pout.
"again, incorrect!"
"ok, do you prefer my hair natural or with blonde highlights?" you say looking at alessia who's looking at your hair which at the moment is your full natural colour.
"with blonde" alessia says knowing how much you do love it when it comes to getting your hair done.
"incorrect!"
"nah, now your just lying to wind me up!“
"no, you should prefer me no matter what" you say as she lets out a loud groan, "i don't like when your being all serious, can my big softie come back?"
"i can't cope with these questions"
"i can't believe your getting these so wrong!"
"i can't win.”
"would you kiss someone for £10 million, that wasn't me?" you say looking alessia in the eye as she does back to you. "no!" there being a slight pause after she said her answer, the blonde being done with your game you were playing wanting it to be over now cause it was beginning to mess with her head.
"incorrect!"
"what so i would!" she says confused as to why you've said it was incorrect, "yeah!" you said as if it was again the most obvious answer she could have said.
"you just told me i can't kiss 49 other women!" she argued back as you were now beginning to try not to break your straight face.
"i never said you had to kiss them on the lips, could of kissed them on the finger!" you protested as she shook her head mumbling how she doesn't like this silly game you've come up with.
"you've just lost us ten million! you know how many jelly cats i could of had with that." you frown.
"terribly sorry, i'll buy you the jelly cat instead"
"last one, this is the make or break one, if you went to the shop and i said i didn't want anything would you still bring me something back?" you said placing the sheet of paper on the kitchen counter next to your phone which as still recording the whole moment.
"no, cause you just eat what's mine anyway and then not eat what i brought you back, so it wouldn't matter"
"incorrect"
"you should always bring me something back even if i say i don't want anything!" you say a smile beginning to crack on your face.
"got it! note to self always bring you food" alessia says tapping her head as if that was going to help her remember that specific piece of information.
"yes!"
"or drinks"
"yes or flowers!"
"got it!" alessia says bringing you into a bear hug and attacking you with sloppy kisses. "lessi get off me!" you giggle as she carry's on holding onto you as your stood with your back to the counter as she holds you against it, you leaning forward to kiss her cheek.
"incorrect baby, try again!” alessia says a smirk rising on her face. you shake your head at copying your act you had just been doing and lean up to kiss her on the lips as she sighs and smiles into it.
liked by leahwilliamson and 601,925 others
yourusername just been told i have too many jelly cats.. honestly have never heard something so ridiculous in my life!
comments -
alessia baby it’s getting to the point where i can’t get in bed at night because of them all😐
1h 210 likes reply
-> yourusername well i cant sleep with one and not the others. they have feelings too you know!
kyracooneyx omg have you seen the new ones that have just released!
1h 196 likes reply
-> alessia please don’t encourage her you pest!
-> yourusername i know! there being delivered next week!
#alessia russo x reader#leah williamson x reader#woso x reader#lucy bronze x reader#lucy bronze#alessia russo#alessia russo x y/n#football#woso community#woso#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso blurbs#first post#arsenal women#arsenal wfc#awfc x reader#awfc imagine#awfc#enwoso
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🫧𓇼*ੈTIME AFTER TIME✩‧₊˚🎐
𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ “If your lost, you can look, and you will find me..time after time. If you fall I will catch you, I’ll be waiting…time after time” -Cyndi Lauper 𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋
Summary: after a one night stand with Joost you both can’t seem to get each other out of y’all’s heads. You were always on his mind since then and you couldn’t stop thinking about the blond boy with the cute accent… until your paths cross once more. This time Joost won’t walk away
Note: (all credit for the edit above goes to MCRBATS on TikTok!!) this is a part two for “only stay with you one more night” ITS FINALLY OUT GUYSSS!! I beg for more requests because yall give me the most scrumptious ideas for fics ever!! Also, this is kinda bad so please don’t jump me!!!
Warnings: SUGGESTIVE, Talk of past sexual relations, mostly fluff!
˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚
It had been months, you hadn’t seen Joost since that night that left you both achey in a good and bad way. You’d pondered on your thoughts and feelings towards the blondie and you mentally scolded yourself for thinking he’d come back for you. It obviously meant nothing to him, he probably sleeps with people left and right. You were no different to all the others in his mind.
But you were. Joost couldn’t get your name out his mind. Couldn’t get your pretty face and voice out of his mind. He kept thinking about the way you said moaned his name and how soft your hands were against his rough ones. He wanted to go back in time and make himself bite the curb for leaving your apartment that early morning.
You were so so so much different. Sure, this one night stand wasn’t his first rodeo but the way he looked at you was. The way he felt towards you was, he didn’t know why. He really didn’t. He’d only fully been around you for around 5 hours but those moments gave him a feeling he’d never felt before. He felt so much love, care, and warmth towards your personal being and just wanted to protect you from everything.
He’d ruined it though, we walked through and out your front door that morning. He felt cold as soon as he did but there was no going back now. He had in his signature white earbuds in while he looked out the window of the Uber that was taking him home, his mind still on you. And just like that, that was the last time he’d seen your beautiful face and your addicting scent.
The sound of his friend, apson calling his name pulled him out of his trance. He was setting up for his concert in a few hours, when he was preforming it was the only time he could get you off his mind…well somewhat at least. He went over and helped out apson and the rest of his crew and friends. Helping them set everything up and getting everything done for tonight.
You on the other hand were at your friend, Alexis’s house just hanging out when she interrupted you while you were talking. Her eyes were wide like she’d just remembered something and her movements were one of excitement, taking you aback. “Oh my god!! Sorry to interrupt you but I totally forgot about something, so Mia, Rayo, and Lacey are coming over later and we’re all going to a musicians concert Mia likes!!”
You stare at her with a smile and sarcasm laced in your voice, “now why the hell would you wanna interrupt my story to tell me about that?” You say with a chuckle, “beaacauseee…I want you to come with! It’ll be fun and I know the others would love to have you there too!” You furrow your eyebrows, this reminded you of that night where they all begged you to come out to that club with them where you met that boy you haven’t been able to get your mind off of.
You take a deep sigh, “Lex you know how I feel about things like that.” You reply but Alexis isn’t ready to back down just yet, “no I know but this concert will be different, it’s not as big as mainstream concerts and Mia said it’ll be fun!!” Alexis says looking at you with those puppy eyes and pouting in a sarcastic way.
You groan and just like you did that night months ago you agree. Around an hour later the rest of your friends show up a to get ready. You hang with Rayo fixing your makeup before looking over to him, “who are we even seeing anyways?” You ask him curiously, “man I don’t remember, I just remember Mia putting on his music and showing me a picture of him. Good looking guy and his music isn’t bad whatsoever…soo” Rayo replies with a smile
‘Whatever..’ you think, ‘at least this will be something to get me out the house and doing something.’ You sigh as your friends squeal and run to the car, excited to go. You laugh at their childishness and run after them. It takes around 20 minutes to arrive and the whole time your driving you feel this sensation in your chest, you can’t stop thinking about Joost…he was always on your mind don’t get me wrong but something about this was just different.
Joost was backstage, talking with his friends and trying to calm his excitement for the concert. But something about this felt oddly familiar, he’d never felt this before any concert. His mind now fully immersed and focused on you, he shakes his head as apson calls him over. Trying to shake the thought of you out his mind, as he gets up from where he was sat to walk to apson.
“Het concert begint zo, zijn jullie er klaar voor?” (The concerts gonna start soon, are you ready?) Apson says to Joost, clapping his hand on his shoulder with a smile. Joost takes a breath and smiles at apson, “Ja, ben je er klaar voor? Heb je nog ergens hulp bij nodig?” (Yeah, are you ready? Do you need help with anything else?) Joost replies, nudging apson with his shoulder, this makes apson clasp his hands together. “Ah, Ja, dat ben ik helemaal vergeten. Kom met me mee” (ah, yes, I completely forgot. Come with me..) apson says as the two men walk to set one last thing up.
You and your friends finally arrived to the concert. You all scooted to the front, people being nice enough to let y’all shuffle through. You and your friends talked before music played out making everyone around you, plus your friends scream with excitement. A guy runs out on stage, dressed in a while collared shirt with a black tie and black pants.
He has…short, messy, blond hair.. the same hair Joost had. No way, that wouldn’t be him- that was what you thought before he turned to face the crowd. Those features. Holy shit. It was him. He spoke into the microphone and you immediately knew from the sound of that pretty accent. It was Joost, the boy you couldn’t get out of your head.
Your mind races and you can’t decide if you should be excited or mortified that he’s standing right in front of you. On one hand, this is the boy you’ve wanted to be reunited with for months. On the other hand, it’s embarrassing to face him now. You secretly hope he’ll see you and you’re also hoping he won’t.
He sings his song, “offline” as he looks at the crowd before he sees it. He thinks he’s imagining things, you’ve been a constant in his head for months but there’s no way you’re here right now. No way you’re looking up at him with the same shocked expression that his face definitely has. His voice slightly shakes but he keeps on singing. He’s imagining shit, god he needs to get it together
But it wasn’t his imagination. You were there, for the rest of the concert you and Joost made continuous eye contact. And after the concert was done and Joost was backstage he was his wracking his brain for any way he could catch you. He couldn’t let you leave again, he just got given a second chance and he wasn’t about to give it up.
You were thinking the same things, you were alone in your mind the whole concert. You were thinking and planing about what to do after this, once the concert was done and everyone was leaving. You panicked, “u-um you guys can leave without me, I can get an Uber back home! I need to do something..! I’ll text you when I get home safe!” You say
You knew they wouldn’t let you so you run away before they can protest against your words. You look around, after your far enough away. You second guess yourself once your by yourself. Your heart is racing but your thoughts won. What if he didn’t wanna see you? What is he forgot about you and everything about that night.? You shake your head and realize what you’re doing, your friends probably haven’t gotten far.
Before you can run back to your friends you hear heavy footsteps, you turn around frantically. And you finally see Joost turning the corner to the hallway to where you were. He turns his head when you both lock eyes, both of you freezing. You stared at each other, breathing heavily and hearts racing.
“J-Joost..?” You stutter out, your voice weak and body stiff. He immediately breaks out of his trace at the sound of that voice that he’d missed so much. He runs towards you and embraces you, it was strange…it really was. This amount of affection for someone you hadn’t seen a few months and only spend one night together.
But it felt like you both were intertwined, sewn together in some way (Adrianne Lenker mentioned?!) He smiles, picking you up and spinning you around. “Holy shit it’s really you, fuck I’m so sorry. I regretted leaving as soon as I closed your door. I’m sorry if I made you feel used or unimportant, your not and i-“ he’s put off my a soft kiss being pressed to his lips
You grab his face as his hands pull your waist to be flush against his hips. Both of you are out of breath, pressing messy and rough kisses to each others lips. You moan softly on his lips and joost took his opportunity to slip his tounge into your mouth. Nothing but love shown in the kisses as he presses you up against the wall behind you, towering over you as you finally pull away.
“I’m not letting you go again, I hope you’re aware of that..” he says with his signature smile and you giggle before responding, “I wouldn’t have it any other way..” you say before he lowers his head, catching your lips in his once more
𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ “ Wanna listen to the sound of you blinking, wanna listen to your hands soothe. Listen to your heart beating, listen to the way you move” - Adrianne lenker 𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋
˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚ ˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。˚
TAGLIST: @timewillpasssoon @poppymelonz @pickle-juice-and-vodka @imsiriuslyreal
#joost x fem reader#joost x male reader#joost klein x you#joost klein x reader#joost x reader#joost klein#justice for joost
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there's a lot of valid takes on why Gen Z is becoming radicalised at the rate they are - all that misinformation, tiktok, red pill, the pandemic - all have good points. But I think another factor is that even politically, their sense of normalcy is entirely different to the one of prior generations. The spiral of the last 15 years, the way the Overton window has moved, the change of style and tone in political discourse, the normalisation of anti-democratic ideas, the obsession with people's private lives, the topics that are front and centre during elections these days, the changing concept of the respect and dignity expected in a public office (god I sound like a boomer) - all of that was shocking to us.
the three generations of my family, all born and raised in VERY different time periods from one another, we've all just been equally shocked and horrified again and again these last 15 years - not just by what is happening but how it is happening and by what is possible and how easy it is to make a total mockery of the democracy and the rule of law. For all of us, that was a feeling of realising that something we implicitly trusted in to the point that it didn't need talking about ... just falling away. Or proving to always have been an illusion to begin with. To someone who grows up right now, this safety and security has NEVER existed.
But for these kids - the window of their life where they start becoming politically and culturally aware basically coincides with this downward spiral and I think that makes many of them blind or numb to it. I think for many of them, that's just their understanding of how things naturally progress and politics works. That the way previous generations evaluate the current situation - this framework of intentional manipulation and misinformation and radicalisation - is just fair and acceptable behaviour and that of course politicians manipulate the discourse to get what they want and of course it is normal to tell brazen lies and spread panic if that gets you what you want and if you're loyal to the party, you parrot those lines whether you really believe in them or not. (And let's be honest with ourselves - the seed to that has always been there)
And others, who I imagine intellectually know that things are going downhill, are really stuck in this extremely mind-numbing fatalist mindset (climate change is gonna kill us all anyway, haha) which makes you hopeless and desperate. And being hopeless and desperate also makes you vulnerable to all kinds of manipulation and radicalisation - because the offer you a perspective. Or meaning.
If you think about the trad-wife and redpill stuff or generally christian nationalism but also any movement that instrumentalises history with ideological narratives, you notice that their narratives place periods of stability way back in time in periods that match aspects of their idelogy e.g. their fetishisation of the 1950s. Then they come up with some horrible bad evil enemy that destroyed that paradise and created the 'degenerate' misery we live in now. Authoritarians and ideologues and cults have always done this. It's part of constructing the mutual enemy.
Beause this way, they can create their illusion of this kind of mythical, unreachable utopia (the past) that fascists love and attach all kinds of conditions to reaching that - with no pressure for them to ever actually deliver: women staying at home, racial segregation, christian hegemony, eugenics, absolute exclusion of gay and trans identities etc. This doesn't just have the benefit of pushing their politics on a confused youth (though that's a big benefit) - it also helps them hide from young people that these last 15 years, they literally created the chaos that these kids are living in. They sowed this situation and right now, with the radicalisation of the youth, they are reaping the rewards.
And the thing is, we can blame the Tiktok or whatever but I also think it is important that we let younger people know and feel that what's happening right now - is just not normal and not sustainable.
And yes, we need to let go of the naive illusion that "the kid are going to save the world". We should never have had that. But I also don't think a radical heel-turn vilifying all of Gen Z is going to help anyone or do justice to the situation.
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Light my Love
~Light My Love by Greta Van Fleet~
Author's Note: requested! plus size reader :)) Summary: Quinn comforts Y/N after her Instagram comments start to get to her Warnings: negative language towards plus size, swearing Word Count: 2,172 Quinn Hughes x plus size fm!reader
Quinn and Y/N have been together since his sophomore year at UMich. They met at one of the football games where he has always said it was love at first sight. Well, at least on his part. She stood in front of him in the student section, and she turned around for only a moment and their eyes connected. It was safe to say, Quinn fell hard.
A smile instantly came onto his lips once he met her gaze, she shyly turned around as she’s never had someone look at her like that. With so much admiration from the moment they met each other’s gaze.
Quinn didn’t hide his attraction to her, he kept tapping her shoulder to talk to her. Needing to know more about the mystery girl in front of him. His friends were shocked to say the least, he was never someone who went out of his way to talk to a girl. He was always paranoid that photos would be taken and he would seem like a flirt or a creep.
But this girl was different, her smile was genuine, her eyes were bright and squinted so slightly every time he said something dumb. She was funny and competitive and so supportive of him and his dreams. Even though she was a die hard football fan, she was willing to learn hockey to support him. Long distance was almost impossible, if she didn’t fly to Vancouver nearly every weekend to spend time with him.
It was safe to say that he was madly in love with her.
It took a long time for Y/N to realize that he was in love. She was bigger, always has been. It was rare for a guy to even give her a second look, let alone pursue her the way Quinn did. Quinn didn’t notice the way his friends were looking at him that day. They were almost disgusted by the way she looked. Because why would Quinn Hughes go after a fat girl. She knew that’s what they were thinking.
But after they started dating, the boys didn’t say or act like it mattered. She was just Quinn’s girlfriend and she was content with that.
Quinn never shied away from his love towards her. He was never big on PDA, but he was never afraid to touch her or hold her in public. But behind closed doors, he was a romantic and he always has to be laying with her or cuddling with her.
Tonight was no different. Quinn had his head on her chest as he was half-asleep watching his brothers’ game. She was busy, scrolling through her Instagram comments. For the first time in their relationship, she unprivated her account. Which quickly led to a flood of comments about her appearance and how she wasn’t close to being good enough for Quinn.
The comments progressively got worse as the days gone on. She started deleting old photos, any photos that seemed to get in an influx of horrible comments. She knew that she wasn’t good enough for him. It was obvious but she never made her insecurities his problem.
There was never a moment she didn’t feel loved by him but she always felt that she never deserved it.
“Baby,” he mumbled as he ran his hands up and down her sides as he slowly opened his eyes. “What’s the score?” he muttered. She giggled softly.
“Still 0-0,” she muttered as she ran her fingers through his hair. He hummed as he slowly began to drift back into sleep, “Let’s just go to bed,” she said as she slowly ran her fingers through his hair once more.
“N-no, I’m watching this, I swear,” he said lifting his head slightly as he switched his gaze towards the TV.
“You sure?” she teased.
He hummed as he forced his gaze open, “What are you watching?” he asked, nudging the phone that was rested on his back. She quickly shut the phone off and placed it on top of the couch.
“Just some TikTok videos,” she lied as she shifted her gaze towards the TV screen, watching the Devils powerplay get to work. He hummed as he lifted his head, looking down towards her. For a while she wouldn’t look at him, he frowned as he took a hold of her chin, forcing her gaze towards him.
“You alright?” he asked quietly as he scanned her features. She nodded her head and he continued to scan her face. “Okay,” he let out softly before he leaned towards her and delicately kissed her for a few seconds before he rested his head onto her chest again. His eyes widened as he watched Luke wrist a shot towards the net.
“Baby, I think I’m gonna head to bed,” she mumbled as she ran her hand up and down his back. He lifted his head up again, staring down towards her.
“O-okay,” he mutter, grunting as he slowly climbed off of her, standing above her. Quinn held out his hand, waiting for her to take it. She gladly accepted it as she slowly got up from the couch. “Come on, love,” he said as he leaned down and took a hold of the TV remote and turned off the game.
~~~
For the past few days the comments have gotten worse and harder to ignore. Every comment was about her appearance, all of it was about how Quinn was too good for her. She was pulling away from Quinn, which was easy because he was on a roadie. She kept avoiding his calls, for different reasons.
It wasn’t completely unusual for them to have a lack of communication with him being gone. But it was usually Quinn unable to call her back. She would always text him the automated, can’t talk right now.
For the fourth time today, Quinn held his phone against his ear hearing the phone ring and ring. He clenched his jaw as he tilted his head back. Tonight was their last game for the roadtrip so he’ll be coming back home to see her.
“Shit,” he pulled the phone away from his ear as he stared towards their messages to see another can’t talk right now.
“She still dodging your calls?” Brock asked as he glanced towards the camera several feet ahead of him. Quinn took in a sharp breath as he hummed, “What did you do?” Brock asked, smirking slightly. Quinn shook his head, while tilting his head back.
“I’m trying to think of something I did but I literally cannot think of anything,” he countered while shaking his head.
“You think she did something? Maybe she just doesn’t want to talk to you,” Brock offered as he glanced towards the camera. Quinn kept his head low as he kept his eyes on his shoes. He clenched his jaw as he took in a sharp breath.
“You think she cheated on me?” he asked quietly, his heart began pounding hard against his chest. His breathing began to quicken. “She wouldn’t do that, would she? I mean she wouldn’t move to Vancouver with me if she was just gonna ch-”
“Okay, okay I don’t think she would cheat on you, that’s not what I was implying. Let’s not implode?” Brock offered, smacking his hand against his shoulder.
“Right, right, okay, I’m gonna call her again,” he mumbled as he walked ahead of Brock, to get a moment of privacy. “C’mon baby,” he said as it continued to ring and ring. It took several seconds before she answered, she didn’t talk at first. “Y/N, baby?” he let out as he glanced towards another camera, this time it was the camera for the broadcast.
“I’m sorry, I’ve been super all over the place. I love you, have a great game and I’ll be watching as always,” she explained, her voice was hoarse.
“It’s okay, I didn’t realize you had so many plans? I just missed hearing your voice,” he mumbled glancing towards the other players that were heading towards the locker room. He chuckled dryly as she took a sudden breath on her end of the phone.
“I-I miss your voice too,” she muttered sadly. Quinn could tell by the way she was talking that something was bothering her. “You’ll do great tonight, I love you so much,” she mumbled.
He smiled softly, shutting his eyes slightly, “I love you too, I’ll be home soon. You’ll be watching though right?” he asked shyly. He’s convinced that he does bad anytime she’s not watching him play.
“I’ll be watching,” she reassured, an evident smile on her lips from the tone in her voice. He chuckled softly.
“Okay, I-uh-I gotta go,” he muttered waiting to hear a reply but nothing. She ended the call without saying anything. He pulled the phone away from his ear, he stared towards the contact photo. It was a picture of them, only a few weeks back. She was smiling so big as he was kissing her cheek. He’s missed that smile.
“Is she alright?” Brock asked as he walked slowly towards Quinn.
“No,” he muttered as he walked passed him towards the locker room, hoping time would move by faster. He needed to get home for her.
Brock pressed his lips together nodding slightly before he followed after Quinn.
~~~
They won the game, 6-2, and Quinn finally returned home. He stepped into the apartment, turning the corner to see Y/N sitting on the couch. She pulled her gaze from her phone suddenly. Quinn met her gaze, he smiled widely. Usually, she would return the smile but nothing was there.
“How was the flight?” she asked, her voice was scratchy as she dropped her gaze to her lap. He furrowed his eyebrows, leaving his suitcase near the front door as he walked towards her.
He stood behind the couch, leaning towards her. His lips were near her ear, “What’s wrong?” he asked softly before he pressed his lips to her cheek.
She didn’t respond, she kept her gaze on her phone screen. Quinn shifted his gaze down towards her phone, noticing Instagram comments were on her screen. He read the first one, that mentioned his name and his chest began to feel heavy.
“What the hell,” he muttered reaching for her phone.
“Quinn-don’t,” she mumbled as she turned her phone screen off. He shook his head as he stepped back a few steps, pulling out his own phone, “Quinn, I said don’t,” she mumbled as she stood up from the couch.
“How long have these been on your posts?” he asked as he began scrolling through the awful messages.
“It doesn’t matter,” she muttered crossing her arms over her chest.
“It matters! You know what they’re saying isn’t true right?” he let out shoving his phone into his pocket. She clenched her jaw as she lowered her gaze to the floor. “Baby,” he mumbled as he stepped towards her, he rested his hands onto her cheeks. Looking deeply into her eyes.
She pulled away from him. “You know every person that sees us together has those thoughts going through their minds,” she let out, a sob leaving her throat.
“What thoughts?” Quinn argued back.
“That you deserve someone else! Not a girl who’s twice your size or a girl who can’t wear your jersey or-”
“You know I don’t care about that stuff! I love every inch of you,” he expressed as he stepped towards her. She shook her head as she stepped back.
“I mean seriously, Quinn, you don’t look at the girls throwing themselves at you on the glass and think how easy it would be for you two to be together? You won’t get embarrassed for being with the fat girl!”
“I am in love with you! I look at you and see the most beautiful girl in the world, why do you care what these jealous girls think?” he questioned reaching towards her again, he rested his hands on her waist, pulling her towards him.
“I’ve always cared what they think!”
“You should only care about what I think!” he expressed, he raised his hands up and took a hold of her cheeks. He stared into her eyes, “Because I think you’re absolutely stunning, the most perfect girl in the world. You make me happy, you make me feel loved. I don’t ever want you to feel anything less than beautiful and perfect, okay?”
“It’s hard when the entire hockey world hates me,” she mumbled as she looked into his eyes deeply. He pulled her towards him, kissing her deeply.
“They don’t hate you, they’re jealous that we are so happy,” he mumbled against her lips.
“Quinn,” she mumbled.
“Come on, let me show you how much I love you,” he said before he pressed his lips against hers for a few seconds. “And we’re turning your comments off, you’re not allowed to read those awful lies, okay?” he said as he scanned her face. She nodded slightly.
“Okay,” she let out softly.
#quinn hughes x y/n#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes imagines#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes#nhl imagines#nhl#nhl x reader#luke hughes#nhl fic#hockey#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes fanfic#luke hughes imagines#jack hughes x y/n#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes imagines#vancouver canucks fic#vancouver canucks imagine#vancouver canucks
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moth to a flame pt.1 - csb (m)
pairing: soobin x fem!reader word count: 17.5k genre: friends with benefits-ish (he helps her with dating tips and stuff), angst if u squint really hard, smut, fluffy, inspired a bit by moth to a flame - the weeknd warnings: 3rd person pov (as always), mentions of reader in love with another guy (haechan <3), slight fwb dynamic, mature content (fingering, blowjob, deep throat, a tiny suggestion of masturbation, unsurprisingly a mention of big dick!soobin) tagging: @once27, @pageriviera, @gyuzlover, @kookley77-blog, @sendhelpiloveyeonjun
[a/n]: part two here.
Y/N knew from the beginning that being shy would ruin her life. In her defence, she wasn’t a shy kid… Not at all – she had thousands of friends and was ever so bold, leading her close group if they needed that extrovert-hand. Her first teen years still thrived in her social butterfly skills. However, something changed mid to late teens, and she hid inside her shell to never see the light again…
Well, until she met Soobin during college.
They had similar personalities, all drawn to quietness, refined tastes and interests. Y/N still remembered the shock on her face when Soobin said he wasn’t joining their friends at the end-of-the-semester party, simply because he wasn’t in the mood.
Which guy in his early 20s would skip a party and be honest about the reason behind it?!
She decided, then, that he was probably worth of getting over her shyness and befriending.
And now, four years later, they were still going.
Which brought her to the current situation: Lee Donghyuck.
Handsome, extrovert and Soobin’s gamer friend.
They met at a PC Bang, and somehow, clicked. Soobin wasn’t exactly antisocial, but he was shy, reserved and more on the quiet side, so getting close to a loud guy like Donghyuck in such setting was a welcomed surprise. Y/N looked at it as a sign to get out of her shell again, too.
But wanting to do it and doing it were two different things.
[19:06] y/n: where tf r u at
[19:06] binbin🐰: well some of us have stuff to do
jk i just got in
gonna shower and meet u in 15
She couldn’t help but grin, waiting.
The door lock rang with the noise of a password being typed. Seconds later, she heard his shoes being thrown inside the shoe-rack. Then, in a heartbeat, she was met with Soobin’s tall frame. When he saw her, his face broke in a pleased smile, while he rolled his eyes in faux annoyance.
“Now, what the fuck are you doing here?” Soobin took off his jacket, dimples still in full display despite his slightly harsh tone. “Are you that impatient?”
“Beomgyu and Mimi were doing a horror movie session, so we’ll have to do ours here.” She mused uninterested, laying back on the sofa again. “When I got home, they were already there, so…”
“Alright.” He sighed, opening a bit of his button-up. “I’ll wash up and see you in a minute.”
Her attention travelled from his face to his hands, wondering why men normally looked so good undressing themselves. “I’ll be waiting.”
Because, honestly, what else she could do?
Unblocking her phone, she scrolled through TikTok for a while, trying to distract herself. Her girl friends had warned her not to do what she was about to, suggesting she downloaded Tinder and got things over with, but Y/N just preferred to die than to use dating apps… Especially when she had means to try to catch Donghyuck by natural ways.
As soon as Soobin took his seat next to her, hair still damp from the shower and smelling his usual scent of vanilla and warm hugs – if that shit ever made sense –, Y/N felt her heart racing with expectation. It was such a risqué move, but she was desperate.
Somehow, all those years without male attention (in a romantic way) and her unbearable shyness started piling out, and it just got too much.
“Fried chicken and beer.” He mused. “You think of everything, thanks.”
“It’s not me, we’ve decided it yesterday.” She shrugged. “Which one are we watching tonight? We have three options: Kimi no Na wa, good ol’ Inuyasha, and finish that borderline pornographic and weird Kakeguri. Or, and hear me out, or you could finally listen to me once and give Ao Haru Ride a chance.” Y/N tucked her hands in a praying sign.
“I listened to you with Tokyo Ghoul, but only season one was good.”
“It’s because you’re tasteless! And you didn’t even try the manga!”
“You complained about the end in both.” He chuckled.
“B-but it’s because I was there for the gore and Ayato! But Ishida-sensei turned him into a softie…”
“This coming from the girl that only watches shoujo or josei.”
“Well, it’s your loss. Yeonjunnie and I just finished season three of Shingeki no Kyojin, and he’ll assure you I my recommendations are top tier.” She crossed her arms.
“I’ll watch it if you watch Jujutsu with me.”
“Fuck off.” Y/N groaned.
Another chuckle, and his dimples made an appearance. “What’s ‘Kimi no Na wa’ about?”
“Beomgyu said it’s a movie, and it was mind-blowing. Since we have similar tastes, I put it on our list.” She handed him her phone. “But if you’re in the mood, we can always watch Shin-chan.”
Quickly reading the synopses, he shook his head. “I’ll trust you and Beomy again.”
Her smile was enough to make him not care if their choice was good or not.
Y/N had planned to introduce her problem during their anime-party, but as expected, she was so invested in the movie that it escaped her completely. By the end of the animation, she was nestled on her side of the sofa, holding back a sob, teary eyes burning with the need to weep. As the credits appeared on the screen, she looked at her best friend, and her lips quivered.
“Oh God, you too?” Her voice sounded choked.
He had a tear or two rolling down his face, eyes red and glinting. “This was…”
“So beautiful! So tragically beautiful!” She stroked his damp cheek, collecting a teardrop. “Can’t believe you really cried… Beomgyu will holler when he hears about this.”
“So don’t tell him!” He pouted. “Why are you holding back? Your eyes are teary, too.”
“You know I hate crying. However, it’s been a while since I felt so touched by a movie that I almost gave in.” She giggled shakily. “Well, that was amazing.”
“Want something sweet for comfort? I baked Nutella bread.”
“Were you planning on telling me this at some point or…?”
Grinning, Soobin got up and went to the kitchen. “Honestly, I was trying to keep it low, because I don’t want Beomgyu eating them all.” His voice was muffled by the distance. “However, I can make an exception for you.” Since Y/N disliked skinship or anything that made her look weak next to any living thing, throughout years of friendship, Soobin noticed she often used food as comfort.
“When did you bake them?”
“Yesterday.”
“Makes sense.” She chuckled, remembering Beomgyu slept at her apartment, which was on the floor above. “Did his stomping annoy you? He did it on purpose.”
“I barely noticed, I was gaming with the boys.”
Oh.
Her heart skipped a beat, tongue tingling with the unspoken question.
“What did you play? Did you win?”
“Overwatch, and yes, I did. I mean, we did.”
“Who did you play with?” She really hoped her voice was tinged with normal curiosity.
“That you’ve met? Yeonjun and Donghyuck… Beomy was out, as you know.”
“Hmm… Of course, you guys would win, my Yeonjunnie never loses!”
“He almost fucked things up, though.” Coming back with a huge plate, Soobin took his place next to her once again. “Luckily, I had his back. Here, take a bite.” He held the bread in front of her.
Steading his wrist, Y/N did as instructed, biting into the soft dough and being quickly hit by a Nutella explosion. She half-groaned, half-chuckled as the filling stained her chin. Wiping it out with her finger, she sucked the spread and moaned in delight.
“Fuck, Soobin, you get better every time!”
His adorable dimples were on display, and his eyes twinkled with satisfaction. “Right?”
There was a comfortable silence, each eating bread while the credits finished rolling.
Maybe that was the right time to ask him for the favour. Despite her best friends reasoning her not to mix business with pleasure, she just couldn’t think of anyone else to turn to. Also, if he rejected her, then she’d find something else, for sure. But, as for now, this was the best idea she came up with, and if one looked at it seriously, they’d understand it made perfect sense.
“So… I was thinking…” She started, licking her fingers clean.
“Please, don’t. It’s never good when you do!”
“Maybe when Beomgyu and I do it together, I admit, but when I do it alone…”
“And was this alone?” He cut her off, sceptical.
“Why, of course!” Y/N slapped his thigh. “Now, listen, I was thinking… About this guy… I have a crush on him, you know? And it’s been a while since it happened.”
“And?”
“And you’re friends with him... So, maybe if you could help me in this, I’ll be your slave for a week or something?! And by helping, I mean, act like a wingman and also teach me the things he likes, how to flirt with him, what to do when we finally get together, like… Intimate time and… It’d be like, for practice purpose, just so I build up enough confidence to grab his attention and ask him out.” Normally, when she was nervous, she’d start babbling nonsense. But that? That was a whole new level of nonsense. “No hard feelings if you don’t want to or anything. However, I’d really, really appreciate your guidance, because…”
“Stop! Stop!” His big hands waved next to his face, silencing her. “What the fuck are you on?!”
“I beg your pardon?” She frowned.
“Have you any idea of what came out of your mouth just now? Are you completely insane?” His eyes were wide, disbelief dripping in every word. “Y/N, I can’t j-just teach you stuff! This is something you don’t…” He paused, uncomfortable with the mere thought.
“What? If not you, then who? I don’t have a love life, Bin. I haven’t kissed a man in years!”
“I don’t know! Maybe Yeonjun? He’s sure more experienced and... H-he’s your darling dearest!”
“Are you insane?” It was her turn to ogle him as if he was an alien.
“Excuse me?”
“How can you even suggest that?!”
“Suggest what? Yeonjun?” Soobin rose to his full height, restless. “I don’t even know why we’re still on this topic; anyway, yes, he’s your favourite man on Earth, so just…”
“Precisely why he’s not even an option!” She cut him off. “How can you even suggest…!” She was baffled. “Oh my God, that’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard!”
“I don’t know if I should feel offended or relieved by your proposition, then.”
“No, no, no. You’re going about this in the wrong way!” Y/N groaned. “Yeonjun and I are like siblings, kindred spirits. The mere idea of being something other than it makes me feel weird.”
“But the idea of being intimate with me doesn’t? I’m not a kindred spirit to you too?!”
“It’s different.” She huffed, hesitating.
“Different how?”
“W-well, different! Different in a way you’re not a brother to me, but a best friend.” Y/N cringed at the words as they came out, knowing they didn’t sound like a compliment… But they were!
“God, you want me to help you with some guy, but somehow, I’m not even worth kindred spirit category?! You do have a way of making people feel special, Y/N.”
“Ugh, you’re making it sound like it’s a bad thing!”
“It is a bad thing, you lunatic woman!” Soobin shook his head, exasperated. “We’ll be risking our friendship, for fuck sakes! A boy and a girl can’t exactly remain friends after stuff like that.”
“Well, Yeonjunnie and I…”
“You didn’t ask Yeonjun this!”
“Well, if you don’t want to, you can just say it!”
“I just did!” He groaned, ruffling his hair again.
“Ok!” Y/N crossed her arms, pouting.
“Ok!” He mimicked her.
The silence, once comfortable, wasn’t like that anymore. She knew it could come to that result, but she really thought Soobin would say yes. Side-eyeing him, her heart clenched. They used to argue, for she was weirdly similar to Beomgyu in some ways (and he got in Soobin’s nerves often), but Y/N could never stay mad at him for too long.
“I was… It was… It was just an idea.” She relaxed her posture, offering the white flag first. “I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable… I was just desperate for a direction.”
Resting his head on the upholstered headboard, Soobin sighed, forcing his body to relax too. “I’m sorry I lost my temper.” He said. “Who is him, by the way?”
“D-Donghyuck.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“Well, that’s huge.” And he understood her crazy mind a bit more. “I can tell you what he likes, though.” He still stood firm against getting involved with her, but that much he could help.
“Can you?”
“I can’t promise it will work, but…” He shrugged.
“It doesn’t matter, I’d love to hear it!” She reached for him, tugging at his hand with a hopeful smile. “Any little thing you remember, I want to know them all.” Her thumb stroked his skin.
Upon feeling such unusual caress, Soobin looked from their joined hands to her face, lighted-up with a spark of adoration. How did it pass him that his best friend had a crush?! How could he be blind to such changes? Was he really so nonchalant towards others?
“How long has it been?”
“Pardon?”
“Your crush, how long has it been?”
“Almost two months.” It was the first time she blushed because of a real life guy in front of him, and Soobin found it unexpectedly fascinating. “Why?”
“I was wondering why I didn’t notice it before.”
“Well, I don’t exactly go around telling people about it, nor I’ve met Donghyuck enough times for you to pick up the way I become a mess near him.”
He grinned, finding that absurd. Y/N never became a mess near anyone; in fact, she rarely gave people more than three seconds of honest attention.
“You’re not gonna like this, but his favourite food at the moment is jangeo-gui.” His smile grew at her disgusted face. “Better start appreciating eels if you wanna make him happy.”
She rolled her eyes at his teasing, but urged him to keep going.
A week later
In that boring Thursday night, Beomgyu arrived with yet another huge bowl of sweets – this time, matcha and white chocolate cookies.
“It’s out of hand! Someone has to intervene!” He whined, giving it to Y/N. “It’s your favourite.”
“I’m not really into cookies, though.”
“But you love matcha and white chocolate, so wipe this out of Earth, please. I can’t stand looking at desserts anymore!” He pouted. “Soobin is so annoying! Why is he doing this to me?”
“Pretty sure you’re not his target in anything, Beomy, but go off I guess.” Mimi chuckled.
“Then why is he baking sweets non-stop?! He knows how much I like eating them.”
“Maybe he has a lot on his mind, you know he does that when he’s thinking.” His girlfriend shrugged, eyeing Y/N. “Do you have anything to do with this or is it just a coincidence?”
“Me?” Y/N widened her eyes, faux surprise laced in her tone. “Why would I?!”
“I wonder.” Mimi quipped.
“Beomgyu!” Y/N turned to her friend.
“I can’t help, sorry.” He raised his hands in surrender.
“Yeonjunnie would!”
“Of course, he’s your darling dearest! I don’t even come in second, Soobin is there.”
“That’s not true!” She pouted. “You’re Mimi’s boyfriend, I couldn’t possibly put you in first! Besides, despite obvious reasons, you’re my favourite girl friend.”
“I hate her.” Beomgyu looked at Mimi. “I truly do.”
“How can you say that when we’re literally the same person?!” Y/N’s pout grew bigger. “Well, since I’m not cared for here, I’ll go to someone who-”
“Soobin’s not home. He went out with Yeonjun.” Beomgyu cut her off.
“Where to?”
Mimi raised an eyebrow at Y/N. The fact that she didn’t know Soobin’s schedule was enough for her to suppose the eldest one did ignore everyone’s warnings and went on with her crazy plan. And by Y/N’s intentional gaze on Beomgyu (avoiding hers), Mimi didn’t even need confirmation.
“A PC Bang. Actually, I’m quite late myself.”
“Are you going there too?”
“Nah, I’m staying home.” He stood up. “Got your things, babe?”
“Yeah, let’s go.”
“Wait, you’re leaving too?”
“Yeah, I’ll sleep there.” Mimi agreed. “Enjoy your batch of cookies and stop messing with Soobin’s head. Haera said she’ll drop by to install our cabinet, so pay attention to the doorbell.”
“Ok.” Sighing, Y/N took a cookie. “I’ll be all alone and miserable because my friends either hate me or are too busy to hang out with me.”
Beomgyu’s giggle infuriated her, and she cursed Haena and Felicia for not living in the same building. At least, if Hae really showed up, she’d have company for dinner.
It was past eleven when Y/N’s front door opened. She was tucked on the sofa, the plate with 5 matcha cookies already empty, jokingly wallowing in pity for being left out, throat tight and eyes burning with the need to cry – not for the light-hearted drama she made, but for the anime movie she watched. If she wasn’t so intended in pretending to be mad at Beomgyu, she’d text him and recommend ‘5 Centimetres per Second’. It was always gut-wrenching to deal with open endings, and by reviews, this one wouldn’t be as optimistic as Kimi no Na wa’s. At this point, one would wonder: why did she keep watching sad movies if she didn’t want to cry or feel sad?
Obviously, she wanted to challenge herself and see until when she could take it.
Before the first teardrop could break through her resolve, the electronic door-lock rang, and she sat down, surprised. Pausing the movie, Y/N searched for her phone… Haena hadn’t called, but the seven missed calls from ‘Darling dearest’ and three from ‘Binbin’ warned her beforehand.
“Yeonjunnie?!” Whoever looked at her wide grin now could never guess she was about to cry milliseconds ago. Rushing towards the man, she hugged him tightly.
“Hi, darling.” Yeonjun kissed her head. “Watcha doing? Why didn’t you pick up?”
“I was watching a movie.” Y/N gestured to the living room. “Wanna come in?”
“We’re already in, but I just dropped by to see you for a bit. I’m heading home.”
“I’ll crash here, though.” Soobin stated. “Beomgyu’s sulky because we lost and he’s blaming me… I don’t want to deal with his complaints, so I’ll spend the night. Is it ok?”
“Of course.” She agreed. “Don’t you want to stay too?” Her fingers pinched Yeonjun’s arm slightly, and Soobin wondered why she was always so quick and sure in wrapping herself around their friend, but when it came to him or anyone else, Y/N was distant.
“Nah, then we won’t get an hour of sleep.” He chuckled. “You’ll talk my ears off, and Beomgyu already did it… In screaming fashion.”
She grinned. “Looks like he wanted to piss everyone off today. I’m mad at him too.”
“That’s new. What happened?”
“He said he’s not my first option, so he didn’t defend me when I needed him to.” She shrugged, scrunching her nose a bit. “You would jump down anyone’s throat for me, wouldn’t you?”
“Without hesitating.” Yeonjun agreed. “We both would, actually. And that’s why we’re better than Beomgyu, so don’t sweat it. I’m leaving.” With another kiss on her head, he pinched her cheek and moved to the door, eyeing Soobin with a raised eyebrow. “Bye, bro.”
Soobin waved, sighing. “See ya.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay? I’d love to have a sleepover with my darling dearest and my Binbin.” She tried one last time.
“Not tonight, darling. I really need some rest.” Yeonjun lied, going out.
Truth be told, Y/N didn’t mind it that much. Her real problem was the white elephant that still lingered in the room when she was alone with Soobin.
He ignored her for the whole week, and she didn’t blame him. Y/N ignored him too. They played safe while he listed what Donghyuck liked or not, but after the topic died, she was annoyingly embarrassed, and soon excused herself home. It was their last conversation up until now. She kept herself busy during the whole weekend, then, thanks to her job, she didn’t have much time to spare until tonight. When Beomgyu told her Soobin was out with Yeonjun, her stomach did flip in relief, for she wouldn’t have to show up in his house out of nowhere, just so their friends wouldn’t notice something definitely wasn’t right with them.
She was never shy near Soobin, and he most definitely wouldn’t pretend she didn’t exist.
But he baked non-stop, leaving her a bit guilty. In a moment of repentance, she opened Instagram and followed Hyuck. Maybe she didn’t need to bring Soobin into her messy though eventless love life. Maybe she could woo Donghyuck without his (or anyone’s) help.
Facing the floor, she took a deep breath and tried to put on her best expression.
“So… Are you hungry?”
“I had dinner at the PC Bang.” He took off his shoes, taking his pair of slippers that were there.
“Oh, I see. Then, what do you wanna do now?”
“Freshen up and skincare, maybe?” Soobin suggested.
“You already know the way.” She gestured towards the rooms. “I’ll clean this up and meet you in a second.” Taking the plate, she wondered if she should tell him about the sweets. However, Soobin was already moving, and silence kept her company.
Turning off the TV, Y/N rushed to the kitchen.
There was an unsettling feeling in her stomach. He couldn’t possibly be there just because his roommate and best friend was annoying – if so, he would’ve slept in her house almost every day. And he wouldn’t most likely show up unannounced, not after what happened to them a week ago.
Which drew her to the only conclusion left: he wanted to talk to her about that.
All the baking, the ghosting, the uneasiness… Soobin had been thinking.
The bathroom had the door opened, and Y/N caught a glimpse of him in his grey sweatpants and white shirt, already changed for bed. She rested against the doorframe, unsure of the silence, but not wanting to push any buttons before reading his mood.
“Are you not joining me?” He asked, bringing her out of her trance.
“Oh, I… Of course.” Stepping in, she took his side, watching themselves in the mirror. Soobin was tall and lean, his black hair was tossed to the back thanks to her hairband. He looked tired, which only added to her guilt. “Did you and Yeonjunnie have fun tonight?”
“Yeah, it was nice.”
“I’m glad.”
He didn’t say anything else, and Y/N felt discouraged. After brushing her teeth, she started her routine and he left, saying he’d wait her in the bedroom.
To say she took her time was an understatement. She was afraid of being alone with him and that awful atmosphere around them.
However, she couldn’t spend the night in the bathroom.
Soobin wasn’t lying on the floor like he used to. He was sitting on her desk, doing something on his phone, but as soon as she showed up, he put it down.
“You couldn’t find the mattress?” She wondered.
“I was hoping we would sleep together.”
Y/N froze.
What the actual fuck?!
“I beg your pardon?”
“I meditated about your request… About Hyuck and all,” He looked at her. “and I accept it.”
If there was one thing Choi Soobin never failed to amaze her, was in his straightforwardness. He had a really non-conflict, introspective and introverted personality… But, boy, when he decided to speak his mind… He didn’t play around. When he reached his resolve, that was it.
“O-oh.” She was flabbergasted.
“So, how is this going to work? We’ll schedule classes?! Go with a more ‘unserious’ approach?”
God, he was…
Overwhelming, sometimes.
“I-I didn’t think much past the need to be helped.” Y/N confessed, feeling her mouth dry. “And you had declined before, so I just… Kind of ignored everything.”
The unsettledness in her stomach was annoying and embarrassing. She knew better than asking him if he was sure – he would never go back to this topic and change his mind if he wasn’t.
“Well, we need a plan, don’t we?”
“Yeah, sure.” Agreeing, her face coloured. “But I’m sorry, Bin, I know I requested it… But I’m not exactly in the mood to… You know… Get intimate tonight.”
“What?” He frowned.
“Don’t get me wrong, you’re handsome and all, b-but… I think I need a bit more time to…”
His chuckle announced his dimples. “Wait, did you think I was asking to have sex with you?!”
“Y-you said ‘I was hoping we would sleep together’!” She retorted, defensive. “We never slept in the same bed, so I... Y-you just had agreed with it and I…”
“I wouldn’t be so tactless, Y/N.” He cut her off, that easy smile still on his lips. “Even if it’s not our main purpose here to woo each other, I’d be more romantic about it.”
Y/N gulped, wondering why the perspective now made her feel… Bothered.
“Ok, let’s end this conversation here. I’m turning off the lights.” She reached for the light-switch. “So fucking awkward, oh my God! What did I have in mind?” Her whisper still could be heard.
“You want to back off? I can just play cupid.” He offered.
But there was no use him playing wingman if she would still feel insecure.
“No.”
“Then lay down and try to relax. Donghyuck is pretty touchy, so you have to get used to someone invading your personal space.” Soobin took his side of the bed, staring at the ceiling. “How is that you can’t leave Yeonjun alone, but when it comes to anyone else, you look uncomfortable?”
“I honestly don’t know. As far as I’m concerned, it’s always been like that.” She shrugged. “I also like it when you hug me and stuff, though you don’t do it often.” Y/N was thankful for the dark, ‘cause this way he wouldn’t catch her blushing (again).
“I thought you didn’t like it, so I held back.”
“Well, I do.” Y/N felt his body warm next to her, pulling the covers over them.
Soobin turned around, facing her profile. His hand found her arm, tracing her skin while going up and down. There was something heavily intimate about the way her breath caught, and he felt his chest tighten at the quiet sound. “Is this alright?”
“Yes.”
“Tell me about the movie.” He asked, knowing some distraction would help ease her out.
“It’s an open ending like ‘Kimi no Na wa’, but from what I understood from the reviews, it doesn’t hint at happiness.” She turned to him, too, and his hand slid to her waist. “B-Bin?”
“But what is the plot? Why did you decide to watch it?” His fingers explored from her waist to her back, urging her closer. “C’mere, I wanna hug you.”
Hugging Choi Soobin was one of a mortal’s most preferred activities, she was sure. On the rare occasions they hugged, Y/N almost melted against him. He had the perfect amount of comfort, warmth and strength… And, again, he smelled so good she wanted to truly dissolve into him.
“It’s divided in three parts.” She moved, being caged by his arms. “W-what should I do now?”
“Hug me back, silly.” He chuckled, and her face was pressed against his chest, letting her feel the vibration of that cute sound. “Keep going, don’t get distracted by this.”
“Easy to say, since you like skinship!” Y/N groaned.
“You’re reading too much into it, it’s just a hug. Relax.” His big hands kept moving on her back, scratching it slightly, like her mom used to do when she was younger and had trouble sleeping.
“Fuck, I must look so pathetic right now.” She looked up, meeting his eyes.
It was dark, the city lights doing a poor job of brightening the room a bit, but Y/N could still see the gleam in those soft boba eyes of his. The blush on her face deepened, heart skipping a bit. Could it be that because it had been so long since she was in a man’s arms (that wasn’t Yeonjun), any minor interaction would have her mind running wild?! Because she felt so confused in how to behave there – should she mimic the caress? Should she rest her face next to his neck, or keep it where it was? Should she turn around and be the small spoon?
“No, you don’t.” His voice was slightly hoarse. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long, but I didn’t know how you’d react. It was really hard to spend anime nights feet apart.”
The confession took her by surprise. “Why is that people care so much about skinship?”
“I’m not sure, but to me, there’s some kind of next-level comfort in it.”
“You’re just touch starved.” She rolled her eyes, noticing his smile widening. Such a pity the dark shadowed his dimples! “However, I’ll admit it’s quite nice.”
“Better than Yeonjun’s?”
“Oh, know your limits.”
Now he laughed, and his body shook a little, grip tightening in reflex. Y/N swallowed the truth: hugging him had absolutely nothing to do with hugging her darling dearest… And it was scaring.
Three days later
Donghyuck offered her a beer and winked. She felt her heart clenching, forcing a smile back.
It was the fourth time she met Hyuck out of a PC Bang. Sometimes she’d join Soobin there, not to play any games he liked, but just to be out of the house a bit. Tonight, she wasn’t feeling like staying home, but didn’t want the noisy mess of the PC Bang… So, her amazing friend suggested they met for chimek after he finished his hours there.
Therefore, here she was, sat between his tall body and Yeonjun’s comforting presence, staring at the guy in front of her with heart-eyes and rosy cheeks… Thankfully, she could blame the alcohol.
“Oh, thank you.” She hoped her voice was steady.
“I saw your Stories yesterday about the Flying Yoga class.” Hyuck grinned. “Soobin aced it.”
“He did, didn’t he?!” Her face relaxed into a more natural smile.
“I still feel my crotch burning and my leg circulation being cut out.” Yeonjun laughed.
“If I was there, I’d be like Beomgyu and scream the whole time.” Donghyuck commented. “I still can’t believe he agreed to it.” The grin on his heart-shaped mouth was enough to make her gulp.
God, she wanted to kiss that man so fucking bad it was embarrassing.
“The instructor didn’t appreciate it, but it made the pain bearable because I got distracted laughing at him.” Y/N replied, not wanting to waist a second without engaging with him.
“I might’ve been the MVP, but Y/N has the best flexibility.” Soobin said, letting his hand rest on her thigh and giving her knee a pinch. “She does Pilates, you know?”
Donghyuck looked at her, interested. “Oh.”
“Do you play any sports, Hyuck?”
“A bit of football, badminton… But nothing too extreme.” He shrugged. “I invited Soobin once to join my football team, but he said he preferred not moving an inch from his bed.”
“He’s a homebody, unfortunately. I had to almost cry in order to drag him to the class.” She chuckled. “I bring him to the gym two to three times a week, but he whines all the time.”
“I might try Pilates with you if you want, sounds quieter and easier.” Soobin offered.
“Tsk, he got so cocky after the Flying Yoga episode.” She playfully rolled her eyes.
Before they could comment on anything else, the waiter brough their fried chicken. As always, a variety of flavours were ordered, so they could indulge without restriction.
Something shifted between them.
Soobin noticed it during dinner – not when Y/N begged him to ‘teach her’ to flirt and all that. His lingering touches might’ve just cracked open something inside her, or a switch had been flipped and she was now a different person… Not that he was gonna complain. He absolutely melted when he took his hand off her thigh, and not a second later, she reached out for him again, linking their arms. And throughout the rest of the night, she just wouldn’t leave him alone.
Walking back home, she remained glued to him.
“Maybe we could’ve g0ne to the club with them…”
“You want to? I can take you there.” Soobin typed his password.
“Do you?”
“Nah.”
“Then I don’t, either.”
He chuckled, letting her inside first. “You’re funny.”
“If you think about it, it’s better this way. I wouldn’t know what to do if Donghyuck flirted with someone, and I’m not exactly ready to be on his radar yet.” She took off her shoes, sighing.
“What is it that you’re so afraid off?”
“I don’t know… It’s been so long and I feel like an insecure teenage girl.”
He hummed. “Well, lucky for you I exist.”
“I swear people assume you’re shy and introverted, but are not aware of your conceited ass.”
“The fact that I prefer being left alone doesn’t mean I’m ugly.” He shrugged, smirking. “You know, these dimples made a bunch of girls cry in high school and college.”
“So I’ve been told.” Y/N pretended to be unphased. “Are you gonna game now?”
“Nope. I think we should finally decide on our plan, no?” Soobin had to hold back another chuckle, for he found it funny that she was avoiding this talk when she was the one to request his help.
“Right now?”
“I don’t see a better time. C’mon Y/N, do you want Donghyuck or not?!”
“I do, but it’s embarrassing to be this inexperienced at my age and let people know about it!”
“Don’t think like that, there’s not a right time for this… People experience love when they have to.”
Her smile was shy, but she felt so glad Soobin was in her life. Not even once he made fun of her insecurities, he was respecting her boundaries and trying to get her off her shell slowly, so she wouldn’t be overwhelmed. Yeah, he did call her a lunatic before, but she could understand where he came from – if he was the one asking such favour, she’d react the same.
That’s why he was so right for the role.
“Thank you.”
His dimples broke in for the nth time, but it was different. This time, she felt the impulse.
“What?” Soobin frowned slightly, noticing her weird expression.
“N-nothing.” Y/N cleared her throat. “Just trying to remember if I brought back my clean pyjamas from home… Or else I’ll have to go upstairs to fetch one.”
“You did, I put it in my stuff. Let’s go, then.”
She gathered her thoughts, trying to reason with them. It made sense, albeit embarrassing. She spent the evening with Hyuck, and Soobin being the chosen one for helping her, it was only natural she’d feel some kind of magnetic force pulling her to him… They were about to discuss strategies that’d take her to Donghyuck. It was obvious she’d fantasise about kissing Soobin.
Because they would kiss each other… At some point.
Ever the gentleman, Soobin let Y/N use the bathroom first. She changed clothes, flossed, brushed her teeth and did her skincare. After that, she laid on his bed while he finished his night routine.
All the time, her mind spiralled between Hyuck’s playful smirk and a way to get it directed at her. He was such a funny guy, his aura pretty welcoming, and if Y/N didn’t spend the whole evening drooling over him, she’d notice how easy it would be to become friends with him – and then, she’d could try being something more. However, she’d just have to get rid of her shyness first. Nothing would work if she kept in her shell, insecure and afraid of letting her true self come out again.
“A penny for your thoughts.” Soobin wondered, slipping in the bed too.
Y/N shuffled to the wall, giving him some room. “How do I stop being shy?”
“Uh… If I knew, I probably wouldn’t be shy myself.” He grinned at her bored face. “But I think you either are born like that, or you get there through trauma.”
“I was born like that… But something happened and I withdraw completely… I can’t remember what, though.” She sighed. “Do you think Hyuck would mind if I’m quieter in the beginning?”
“I think he’d like someone calmer than him, yeah.” Soobin mused. “So, our plan…?”
She groaned, turning to face him. “What do guys like? How does one tickle their interest?”
“Hmm… It’s different for each guy, but normally having a pretty face and a pretty body do the trick.” He couldn’t help but chuckle, knowing she was getting annoyed. “But I know you already know this… So, we can try to find out if he thinks you’re pretty.”
“How?”
“Do you guys follow each other on Instagram?”
“Yeah, I followed him first.”
“It doesn’t matter. Did he like a picture or something?”
“The last posted.”
“Nice.” Then he frowned. “Fuck, Y/N, your last picture posted is from two years ago!”
“Well, yeah, but…” She pouted. “You know I’m not into Instagram!”
“You’re going to have to be more active, though. At least in the start, just so you keep fresh on his mind. Like, every time he opens the app, there you are.” Soobin smiled. “Do you have Tinder?”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Well, maybe if you matched on Tinder, you could crack a joke or something… It can be a good topic. He might like a girl that jokes around like he does.”
She sighed, seeing his point. “But what if he isn’t there? What if–”
“He is there.” Soobin stated. “Now, we just need to know if you’d match. Where’s your phone? Let’s set your profile up right away.”
“You’re enjoying this now, aren’t you?” Y/N gave up resisting, touching the mattress, searching for the device. He giggled cutely when her fingers pinched his waist, and she couldn’t help but smile at him too. “Here, you were laying on it.”
She let him do everything, snuggling closer and breathing his sweet cologne, answering his questions whenever needed. Being this close to him was a whole new state of cosiness, and she was actually living for it. Yes, he was bony and thinner than she actually enjoyed, but Soobin was warm and soothing in a way that didn’t match his body.
He even decided on her profile picture, mumbling quietly that she looked pretty.
“Tomorrow we’ll continue this, ok?” Blocking her phone, he put it on the bedside table. “So, apart from Tinder and Instagram, what else?”
“Shouldn’t you be the one guiding?”
“Not like that, silly. I mean, what else are you insecure about? What do you think you’ll need me?”
“You already told me some of his preferences, so I feel confident enough to start a conversation… Well, if I stop drooling over him whenever he’s near.” She chuckled. “But… Bin, what do people do in a date? I’ve never been to one, you know.”
“Never?”
“Never.”
“Never ever?”
“Are you deaf?”
“Sorry, I’m just surprised. Why not?! Not even when you were in high school?”
“Well, I didn’t exactly give boys many signs I wanted to be asked in one.” She shrugged.
“Wow… I feel… Weird about this information?” He frowned. “So maybe we should focus on that, no? Like… How about we go on a fake date? I’ll try to find out what type of date Donghyuck usually goes and we mimic them, so it’ll be easier for you.”
“You’re the best, Bin.” Y/N pinched his arm, appreciating the effort.
“I know.”
A week later
A fucking amusement park.
Yeah, she probably should’ve seen it coming.
Not that she was upset by Donghyuck’s/Soobin’s choice… Maybe a first date wasn’t exactly supposed to be romantic at all, for people didn’t know if they’d click or not.
Everland was a good place, there were nice rides, sightseeing in a cute zoo and great food. Keeping it a secret from their friends, so they could come alone, both left home early – also planning to avoid the huge crowd for as long as possible, and to enjoy the day to the fullest.
As soon as they entered, Soobin suggested they bought a souvenir, so they could get into their couple persona. He chose a red panda hat, and she ended up with a normal panda one.
“What do you want to do first? See the animals, go for the rides or eat something?”
“We ate not an hour ago, Bin. Let’s see the animals, then we go for the best part.” She grinned. “I want to ride the Seater Human Sky for Zootopia. Can we?”
“Of course.” He searched for her hand, intertwining their fingers. “I’m sure Hyuck will touch you without hesitating, so I’m trying to behave like he probably will.” Not that he needed to explain himself, but he did anyway. “Let me buy these, and then we’re good to go.”
“Oh, alright.” Y/N gave him her hat. If he wanted to pay, she wouldn’t dodge out of politeness. This was a fake date, ok, but she should act like she would in a real one.
They visited all animals, spending almost the whole morning on it. Lots of pictures were taken, and although Y/N was used to talk a lot, she kept relatively quiet. Sometimes, they would look at each other and laugh, because it was funny to keep asking those first-base questions while already knowing the answers… And every time his dimples showed up or his huge hand touched her, she was reminded that it was her best friend there, not Donghyuck.
And, at some point, she messed up.
Maybe after they finished their tour in American Adventure and went for lunch… Or during the T-Express ride, for rollercoasters always lifted their spirits (and they were still high from the Rolling X-Train experience)… The way he was beaming with satisfaction made her stomach churn.
With the sunset colouring the skies, they left the park with an unsettling feeling.
The trip home was silent, with Soobin falling asleep as soon as the bus took off, and Y/N listening to her playlist, looking at the photos they took throughout the day and erasing those that were blurred or snapped by mistake. She sent one of Fu Bao to Yeonjun, knowing how much he loved the panda. Then, amidst cute animals, she found a video of Soobin’s side profile. He had his dimples on full display, and his… Cocky smile too?
Y/N could hear herself talking behind the camera, but she couldn’t make up the words, too startled by the realisation that he was really handsome. Closing the gallery app, she sighed and tried to get some rest too. There was no point in entertaining such thoughts.
Less than an hour later, they were walking back to their building. Soobin said he’d drop her off, like a gentleman would obviously do, and kept his hand on hers the whole two-blocks distance.
“Will you go up too?” She wondered.
“It’ll be too forward for a first date, won’t it?”
“Well, I don’t know? You do live here, after all.”
“But Donghyuck doesn’t.”
Donghyuck… Yeah, of course.
“Right.” She cleared her throat. “Then, goodbye. I had a lovely and funny time today.”
“I’m glad.” He smiled softly. “We should do it again.”
“I’d love that.” Y/N got on the tip of her feet. “Goodnight, Bin. I m-mean, Hyuck.” She kissed his cheek (more like his jawline) and almost ran towards the building entrance.
Pressing her floor number while trying to conceal her exaggerated and annoying heartbeat, any idea of peace vanished as Soobin’s tall frame occupied the other side of the elevator.
“I do live here, after all.” His voice was light, tinted with mirth.
There it was again, the slightly cocky, patronising smirk.
She looked at the ground, confused by her own reaction. They kept silent except for the usual ‘Goodbye’ when he arrived at his floor first.
Typing her password, Y/N entered her house feeling dizzy.
Something was wrong. Something was really wrong and she only had her celibacy to blame! Taking off her shoes, she sat down on the hall, ruffling her hair and groaning in exasperation. However, before she could give in to a tantrum, the doorbell rang. Confused, she opened it without checking. Her closest friends knew the password, but maybe…
Barely registering the black hair and known warmth, Y/N was pressed against the wall, Soobin towering over her, bringing her jaw up and smashing his mouth against hers.
Her body froze, mind going blank at the unexpected touch.
She remained unresponsive for a second or two, trying to overcome the initial shock. It was enough for him to back off, misunderstanding her lack of reaction. He was still a breath away, though, his nose bumping into hers as he looked her in the eyes.
“I’m sorry, I don-”
She cut the distance, kissing him again. Really doing it now.
Her arms circled around his neck, pulling him closer, moaning at the way his fingers tugged on her hair, tilting her face up. His tongue took advantage of her open mouth, slipping inside and starting its conquest. Y/N felt putty in his embrace, puzzled and consumed by the caress. She thought that those years of being romance-deprived would have turned her into an inexperienced girl once again, but it didn’t look like that.
She knew what to do, and her body seemed to understand it as well.
And even if she didn’t, it was clear Soobin did.
Shivering at the reminding of her kissing her best friend, something burned inside her. She felt bolder, nails scratching his nape and mingling with the soft strands of his hair. He groaned like a defeated warrior, pressing her harder between the wall and his body.
The whole fire made a known path, and Y/N snapped back into reality.
“Bin-?!” She pushed him away, gasping for air at the same time.
He looked at her through heavy lids, the light in the hall being enough to let her see his dark eyes gleaming with a mixture of emotions she also felt. Nevertheless, all that seemed to be swept aside when he blinked, a controlled and neutral expression taking over.
“Donghyuck would kiss you after the first date. I’m sure he would.”
And just like that, Soobin killed the spark.
The first contact after the events of the other night was awkward.
Upon feeling his hands on her, for their usual hug as a greeting, her voice cracked and her heart raced, the heat of embarrassment creeping up her spine. When their eyes met, her breath caught, remembering the way he looked at her seconds before shoving her right back in reality.
‘Donghyuck would kiss you after the first date. I’m sure he would.’
She was mad at herself for being mad at Soobin for saying that. Wasn’t finally being with Hyuck the sole purpose of all that?! Why was she a bit depressed he kissed her with that in mind?!
Was she so affection starved that she would start fantasising about Soobin now?
Pathetic.
“‘Seeing Fu Bao without my darling dearest to assert dominance.’” Yeonjun scoffed, showing her his phone – opened on her IG Story.
“She’s my rival, I had to.” Y/N shrugged. She had just posted one of Fu Bao’s videos from the date, because Soobin requested her to be more active on her social media. She’d added Hyuck on her Close Friends, hoping it would be a good hint of her true intentions.
“Your rival?” Yeonjun frowned.
“You love her a lot… It bothers me.”
“You love Soobin a lot and I don’t consider him my rival.”
“It’s different!”
“Why?”
“I don’t love him like I love you.” Y/N pouted.
“She’s so open about her favouritism.” Haena chuckled. “Sorry, Soobs.”
“I’ve been warned about this before, so I’m kinda numb to the pain.” Soobin jested. “It’s not nice losing to him, but I can manage being second.” He eyed Beomgyu. “At least I’m not third.”
“Well, I have a girlfriend and Y/N respects the fact my girlfriend is my favourite always!” Gyu retorted, a hand on his heart as if he felt offended. “And she can’t make me her favourite, either.”
“But you’re not the second, Bin!” Y/N pleaded, feeling her stomach sink a bit. “You’re…”
“Your best friend, Yeonjun’s your brother. Yeah, I know.” He commented, pouring himself some beer. “You told me that already.” On the day she asked him for that absurd favour… He was glad she seemed a bit ashamed of being biased, at least.
Y/N gulped, going quiet too soon. Normally, she’d argue, trying to make her point. Right now, though, she didn’t have the energy nor the facts to fight him.
Because things have changed.
More than ever, she was so painfully aware that what she felt for Yeonjun had nothing to do with what she felt for Soobin. She couldn’t even fathom doing more than some specific skinship with Yeonjun without feeling like committing incest… Whereas with Soobin, her mind entertained some different thoughts altogether – as outrageous as they should be.
It only took one kiss, and all the platonic, ‘academic research’ notion she had of Soobin crumbled.
She really believed she’d be immune to whatever happened between them, because Donghyuck was exactly what she wanted… However, she didn’t consider the impact of her celibacy. Y/N was painfully starved for attention and intimacy, and Soobin made her aware of that.
The sooner she got a grip of herself, the better.
That’s why she was there, pretending nothing had happened.
The second contact after the events of the other night was slightly better.
Soobin texted her saying he’d game with the boys, and asked if she wanted to join. Twenty minutes later, Y/N was lying on his bed, reading, while he played.
“What are we having for dinner?”
He looked over his shoulder. “I’ve no idea. What do you suggest?” He frowned. “No, not you. I’m talking to Y/N.” Soobin murmured to his headset. “Yeah, she’s here.”
Sitting on his bed, she stared at his computer screen as if he was on a videocall. “Who is it?”
“Hyuck says hi, Yeonjun is apologising for ignoring you on your chat.”
“I see.” She smiled. “Tell him I’m never talking to him again, and tell Hyuck I said hi back.”
“She’s not talking to you ever again, dude. And she said hi, Donghyuck.”
“Anyway, I’m thinking hot pot thoughts… Or sweet and sour pork.” Y/N suggested.
“Why not both?” He chuckled, listening to his friends on the call. “Yeonjun said you can’t spend more than thirty minutes ignoring him, so he’s not feeling exactly threatened.”
She sucked a breath, pretending to be offended. Crawling to the end of the bed, behind his chair, she turned him around and tugged at the headset, bringing the microphone closer to her mouth. “Is this a challenge, Yeonjun? Because I’d love to prove you wrong!”
“Wow, she said ‘Yeonjun’!” Beomgyu hollered, and she could hear his voice from his room.
“I’d feel pretty much threatened right now, bro.” Soobin stared at her, taking in the small distance between them. Their noses were centimetres away, breaths fanning over each other. His eyelids dropped as he tilted his head just a bit, unconsciously giving into her magnetic field.
As if electrified, Y/N stepped back. “B-both, then.” She cleared her throat. “Gonna order it.”
The third time, she met him at the entrance hall, after coming back from the gym. He was getting out of the lift and she was entering it – they collided, her sweaty head bumping into his chest.
“Fuck, sorry.” Y/N petted the moist spot, as if it’d disappear.
“Morning.” He smiled. “It’s ok, it’ll dry in no time.”
“Are you going to work?”
“Nah, going to grab something for breakfast… Wanna join me?”
Y/N wanted to melt on the floor, glad for the atmosphere between them not being awkward anymore. “Of course, if you don’t mind the stink.”
“I don’t.” He took her hand. “Morning.”
It was her time to grin, intertwining their fingers. “Morning, Binbin.”
The first tray of brownies was just out of the oven when Beomgyu walked into the kitchen.
“Am I going to have to eat all of it?” He pointed at the hot tray.
“Uh… No?”
“Why are you freaking out?”
“I’m not freaking out.”
“Dude, it’s been a week since you went back on your cooking therapy.”
Yeah, and it’d been a little over a week since he kissed Y/N.
It’d been over a week since they seemed to go back and forth on walking in eggshells. And he knew she was having some kind of mental breakdown due to that, ‘cause was he too.
Not that kissing her wasn’t riveting. It had been a while since he kissed a girl, and his body just reacted to that. He was intrigued by his own response. However, he was already regretting giving in to her schemes… Because he could foresee the imminent rupture in their friendship, could taste the awkwardness that was settling between them.
And yeah, maybe Beomgyu was right – he was freaking out.
He was panicking at the mere thought of losing his best friend.
“I just enjoy cooking, what is wrong with that?” Soobin knew he sounded defensive, but he wasn’t able to come up with a better rebut.
“Ok, keep telling yourself that.” Beomgyu rolled his eyes. “Is Y/N coming down? ‘Cause I’m coming up, Mimi and I will go to the arcade tonight.”
“Why would she come down?”
“Well, aren’t you guys working on getting her into Hyuck’s pants?”
Soobin froze. “What the f…”
“You really thought you two could keep this a secret from everyone?”
“N-no, but… You could use nicer words.”
Beomgyu tilted his head, pouting. “Aren’t you guys trying to turn her into a Sex Goddess?”
“Oh God, why do I even bother?!” Soobin shook his head, glaring at the ceiling for a brief second.
“I don’t know, either.” He chuckled. “Is she coming or not?”
“No.”
“Give her a piece, at least. I’m gonna get fat at this rate!” Turning around, he waved. “See ya. I’ll probably sleep upstairs, so don’t wait for me.”
Sighing, Soobin waved back. “Alright; have fun. Bye!”
He stared at the oven for a solid minute, contemplating what to do.
Whenever he had an opportunity, he’d mention Y/N to Hyuck. Things like how funny and pretty she was, something cute she did, a tender memory he had of her… And all those times, Hyuck listened with regard. But what use would that be if she still felt insecure?! That’s why he got a grip of himself and opened their chat – they should have another lesson.
[18:43] soobin: r u busy?
Almost a minute later, she replied.
[18:44] y/n: no… why?
[18:44] soobin: i baked two trays of brownie 🥺
[18:44] y/n: choi soobin
u r literally the best thing that has ever happened to me!!!!!
see u in a second
[18:45] soobin: 😋
It was pathetic that she took some time to get ready. Normally, Y/N wouldn’t even bother changing her clothes… However, she decided to drop her old and comfy nightgown for her brand-new pyjama set, an emerald-green satin shorts and button-down shirt. It was one of her favourite colours and Soobin used to say it looked really good on her.
Cringing at the perspective of fishing for compliments, Y/N pinched her cheeks and cleared her throat, walking out of the elevator as if each step didn’t make her confused mind a bigger chaos. Typing the password, she was greeted by the delicious smell of brownies. Heading to the kitchen, she took a second to prepare herself to face him again.
“Binbin?”
He turned around from the sink, opening one of his marvellous smiles. “Hi there.”
“So… Am I getting a whole tray for myself, or will I have to share with Beomgyu?”
“A whole tray for yourself… If you help me out here.” Soobin chuckled.
“Maybe sharing isn’t that bad?” She jested. “It keeps me humble.”
“Humbleness doesn’t suit you, Y/N. You’re made to look down on us, mere mortals.”
“That’s so sweet of you.” She pretended to dry her eyes, grabbing the kitchen towel.
“The only person you think is actually above yourself is Yeonjun, and don’t even try to tell me I’m wrong.” He nudged her with his elbow. “I know you better than I know myself.”
Y/N felt her stomach dropping.
Did he?
Was it possible he knew that whenever those dimples came out, she felt… The impulse again?
And because she was so confused with her own reactions, she decided to bring up the safer topic.
“Donghyuck asked me about the leather workshop class we took, he said he liked your wallet and you told him we went there and did it together.”
“I’m trying to bring you up in any opportunity I get.” Soobin agreed. “And what else happened?”
“Nothing much, we chatted a bit about it and then he said he’d try to book a class.” She sighed. “He didn’t ask for my number, Bin. It was the perfect excuse for it! Or he could’ve just said ‘Do you want to join me on it, again?’” She pouted. “I couldn’t find him on Tinder either!”
“I know it’s frustrating, but… Maybe we’re approaching this the wrong way?!” Finishing washing the last dirty dish, Soobin looked at her. “We need a party.” He declared. “Hyuck likes them, and if he sees you in a different light, with a different mood altogether, I’m sure he’ll get hooked.” By the way she hesitated, he knew exactly what was going on. “You’re insecure about it, aren’t you?”
“What if I mess it up?”
“That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”
Y/N stared at him, conflicted between playing it cool or being honest. They were best friends, for fuck sakes! She trusted him and he trusted her back – and getting him to help her was their main purpose, as he had pointed out.
“What do you have in mind, then?” She sounded so vulnerable Soobin’s heart melted.
But before he could say anything else, he needed to get some things straight. He wouldn’t survive going another week with that weird and distant vibe between them. This next lesson would be different from any other, and he needed to know she was ready to go through it.
That their friendship was ready to take the blow and don’t die from it.
“What did you feel when I kissed you?”
She froze. “I beg your pardon?”
“That day when we went on a date… When I kissed you like Donghyuck would, what did you feel after?” His eyes searched for hers, but she shied away, staring at the towel on her hand.
“I… Well… I noticed that I’m really desperate.” Y/N cleared her throat, hating the way she felt so small and embarrassed at her own neediness.
“Desperate for what?”
“Intimacy. Anything a man can give me.” The words came out rushed. “And it’s so annoying.”
He frowned at her confession. He expected her to say something along the lines like ‘desperate for Donghyuck’, but she didn’t. “Why is it annoying, though? It’s normal to want to be wanted.”
“Yes, I know, but… I feel like I missed my timing. It’s weird to never have dated at my age; and what if Donghyuck thinks there’s something wrong with me?!”
“Only stupid men think stuff like these, Y/N. Normal and nice boys know everyone has their own time to blossom and don’t rush nor judge others.”
She looked up, finding him already staring at her. His soft boba eyes shone with tenderness and resolve, as if what he said was the absolutely truth.
“You’re really a different brand of man, Choi Soobin.” She gave him a small smile. “And really one of the best things that has ever happened to me.”
“You flatter me.” He chuckled. “But I asked that because I think the best way for you to feel more confident is knowing that you can entice even when being ‘inexperienced’. ‘Cause, honestly, I didn’t even remember you hadn’t kissed a man in ages when we were kissing.” He confessed. “It just downed me later on, because things were awkward between us, and I got pissed off that we let it come to that and you didn’t tell me how you felt. I don’t like us distant.”
“Me neither.” She sighed.
“So let’s promise we won’t be like that again, or else I can’t help you.”
Y/N bit her lip, hesitating again. “But what if I can’t…”
“Then we’ll end everything.” He cut her off. “I don’t read minds, Y/N. If you don’t tell me what’s bothering you, how can I be of help?!”
“Alright. I’ll try.”
“No, darling, you’ll do it.” He shook his head. “I’m not letting our friendship on thin ice anymore.”
“Oh, ok, Bin! I’ll do it.” Rolling her eyes, she stuck her pinkie up.
“Good girl.” Their fingers touched. “So no more awkwardness no matter what we do.”
“And if one feels uneasy, we got to be vocal about it.”
His eyes darkened slightly, wondering (without his own permission) about what else Y/N would be vocal about. Clearing his throat, he pointed to the brownies. “Fancy some before we move on?”
“Yeah, it’ll be good to ease me up.”
“I wanted to put caramel in, but you complained about eating too much candy recently and I know how you love caramel, so I decided to make it plain, so you won’t feel sad if you don’t eat much.”
She smiled, touched by the gesture. “Thanks.”
“Here, take a bite.” He offered a piece.
It wasn’t something unusual, they normally did this… However, this time her eyes spent a little longer analysing his hand – the pretty and veiny forearm, how the brownie looked so small compared to his palm, how close his fingertips were from her mouth… And suddenly, she could see herself in one of those luxury porn movies, where any minor action was made to entice – so, instead of taking a bite, she’d lick on his digits, sucking them as if…
Y/N almost stuffed the whole piece in her mouth, hoping its taste would erase such confusing and horrible thoughts. God, what she needed was professional help!
Soobin had a fond smile, always glad that she liked his food. “Easy there, love. You’ll get a whole batch for yourself.” Some crumbles stuck to her face, gathering on her lower lip and at the side of her mouth while she chewed. “Do you like it that much?! You got dirt all over.”
Y/N remained quiet while he dusted the crumbles off. She felt like melting under his touch and gaze, goosebumps blooming from her spine to her head. The brownie tasted good, obviously, but the sensations didn’t come from its flavour or perfectly gooey texture… Out of habit, he licked the tip of his fingers clean, and that’s when she noticed she’d been too silent.
“Sorry, you know I like sweets.”
“It’s ok. Having you acting like this strokes my ego.” The dimples showed up again as he grinned.
Her heart thumped heavily against her chest, and whatever sane thoughts she had, slipped off her mind when she got on her tiptoes and ended the distance between them.
She kissed him.
She was still kissing him.
And when his arm circled her waist, pulling her up against the kitchen counter, she wished she’d never stop kissing him at all. The hand on her face slid to her nape, fingers threading in her hair and tugging it slightly, pushing her chin up so they could change the angle. As they got closer, his hips came in between her legs, the arm around her waist slipped a bit under her pyjama shirt, and the feeling of his skin against hers was overwhelming.
It was also embarrassing, honestly.
They were still dressed, but she felt so warm, so desperate for more contact, more action…
Then, as if reading her mind, Soobin bit her lower lip while pressing his crotch against hers. That earned him a bittersweet response: she froze, hands gripping his shoulders and eyes widening.
“What happened?” He asked, mouth still on her.
“I-If we keep… We shouldn’t be doing this.”
“But isn’t stuff like this the reason you need my help?”
He was right, of course.
“I’m not sure how to… What should I…?”
“Maybe you could circle me with your legs?” He suggested. “If I was Donghyuck, what would do?”
She gulped, musing. “I’d probably jump his bones.”
“Then jump mine.” He stated. “Pretend I’m him.”
Her eyes clouded, conflicted between obeying or trying to resist. “Here? At the kitchen?”
“We’re alone, relax.” At her intake of breath, he chuckled. “Try to, at least.”
“But won’t it be too uncomfortable?”
His grin grew bigger. “Y/N, you think too much.” He pecked her lips. “Stop thinking, just… Just feel.” His mouth touched her jawline, and she immediately closed her eyes. Soobin nibbled on her skin, leaving love bites on the column of her neck. It was impulsive, not really him wanting to mark his territory, but just… Him reacting to the moment. He quietly undid some buttons of her shirt, but before pushing it off, he needed to know if it was still ok. “Are you ok?”
Y/N was half in heaven, half in hell. “Yes… It’s so warm in here, isn’t it?”
“So can I take this off?” He touched the last button.
“Yes.” Their eyes met, and she hoped he could see the trust in hers.
Tossing the satin on the floor, Soobin’s attention flew to her chest. She was wearing one of her cotton bras, black and plain, but somehow… “You look so pretty in green, but now I realise you look better in black.” He murmured, kissing her cleavage. Her head fell back, a sharp breath that sounded more like a strangled moan coming out of her mouth. Her legs tightened around his body, silently telling him he was doing it right. “Shall I take this off too?” He traced the straps.
“Please.”
It’s been ages since a man had seen her naked, but somehow, the fact that it was Soobin put her at ease. Yes, she might’ve been feeling insecure, however, as they kissed, her neediness surpassed every other emotion… And it was Soobin, for fuck sakes! He was her best friend!
He unfastened her bra and let it loose. Discarding it too, he noticed his mouth watered a bit at the sight of her perk nipples – it was only natural that his big hands groped her boobs, slender and skilled fingers pinching the skin before he dipped his head down, taking one in his mouth.
The moan came out loud and clear, Y/N’s body jolting forward at the sensation. She felt his wet tongue around the beak, licking and sucking on it, his warm touch engulfing her from her waist to her ribs, then to her shoulders, fingertips burning figures everywhere they reached. And it was too much. Pulling at his hair, she brought their lips together once again, needing him, desperate for him. Her hips pressed strongly against his, humping him.
“Bin,” The nickname rolled out with ease, despite the fact she was supposed to imagine Donghyuck there. “Bin, I need more.” Her voice was muffled by open-mouthed kisses. “Please. More.”
And because he was such a gentleman, he couldn’t say no.
He actually didn’t want to.
“More of what? You gotta use your words, love. I want to help you, but I don’t know how.” He lied, touching her boobs again, loving how they felt under his palms.
“Fuck.” She kissed his jawline, legs so tight around his hips that he couldn’t escape her grip. “If we keep doing this, I’ll probably cum.” She tried to reason.
“Do you want to?”
“Desperately.”
His smirk was out of this world. He had that easy, roguish kind of smile, and Y/N felt her insides twirling at the sight. “How?” Although he was supposed to guide her in this, he wanted so bad to hear her desires. Soobin was sure he’d do anything she wanted as long as she kept that flushed expression and cute moans coming out. “Tell me how.” It was almost a plea.
“I-I’m not…” Well, he really was there to help her, so she shouldn’t be ashamed of asking for what she wanted. “I need your fingers.”
His breath hitched slightly, ears buzzing with every word echoing in his mind.
“My fingers? Where, love?” He knew he wasn’t pushing her too far. If she only could step outside her comfort zone a centimetre more…
And when she reached for him, taking one of his hands and sliding it down her belly towards her pussy, Soobin hoped he wouldn’t forget a second of that dizzy, surprising night.
“Here.” Her voice was breathy, laced with wanton and shyness. “Inside me.”
Oh, fuck.
Kissing her again, he rubbed her thighs, prying them open and unlocking them off his waist. He kept his touch pretty close to her crotch, but never coming too close to where she wanted.
“I’ll take off your shorts now, ok?”
She shivered slightly while he rolled the green satin off her hips. When the fabric was discarded, he analysed her, taking in every inch of exposed skin, and Soobin licked his lips, anticipating.
“No panties?”
“I only use them with pyjamas when I’m on my period.” She confessed.
His eyes widened, realisation kicking in. “So whenever we slept together, you were…”
“Pantie-less.” She agreed, blush intensifying.
“Fuck, Y/N.” He groaned, dick twitching at the thought. “So cheeky.”
“It’s healthy to let it breath!” She pouted, defensive.
“I’m not judging, though.” Soobin stole a peck. “I’m just surprised because I didn’t know.”
“Well, now you do.”
“Now I do, yeah.”
Their eyes met, and he couldn’t describe what he saw in hers. However, it was enough to make him react hungrily, latching his mouth on hers once more, a hand slipping between their bodies, resting right on her pretty cunt. She moaned into the kiss as soon as his fingers caressed her, pads gathering some slick before finding purchase on her clit.
It was rather embarrassing, but just the feeling of him there was enough to make her cum.
She felt so overwhelmed and horny she was sure if she stood up, a puddle would be where she sat, but the way Soobin worked her up was so good, she couldn’t help herself. And it’d been so long…
It was impossible to keep her focus, the pleasure so foreign and delicious – thus, she just rested her forehead against his, locking their eyes and basking in those amazing sensations. His hand drove slightly down again, coating in her wetness before plugging a finger inside her without warning. Her breath hitched, lips parting for a whiny moan to escape. His brown orbs, once gentle and patient, now ogled her with hunger and desire. He moved, testing the speed until he got a loud sob from her, hips bucking slightly as he drove in and off.
“Fuck.” She whispered when he quickly pushed a second digit inside her.
“Tell me how you like it,” Soobin ordered. “how to make you cum.”
“Anything,” Y/N closed her eyes, wondering if it would be ultimate humiliation if she drooled any time soon. “anything you do, I’m sure I’ll like it.”
“You’ve got no idea of what I…” He stopped, deciding she wasn’t ready for those words yet.
She gulped as he picked his pace. “Fuck, this feels so good!”
“Look at me.” His dominating aura was new to her.
She stared at those chestnut pools, darkened with a pinch of wildness, curiosity and lust. She’d never seen him like that, demanding, serious but at ease with himself, full of confidence and… So fucking hot. There was also the situation they were in, the unexpectedness of enjoying his touch, the thrill of doing something they probably shouldn’t be doing, the happiness of finally having a man’s attention for her own – she couldn’t control herself, clenching around his fingers.
“Shit,” Y/N threw her head backwards, back arching. “I’m gonna cum?”
“Is this a question?” He chuckled, amused.
“I’m not sure?” Her brows furrowed. “I’m almost…” He inserted a third digit. “There.”
“Already?” His dimples accompanied his smirk, and her heart beat faster. “So desperate, Y/N. You look gorgeous like this.” He cooed. “Keep looking at me and cum, then.”
Obeying was easy. Y/N was so out of herself with wanton it didn’t take more than a minute for her to explode around his fingers, moaning quietly and leaving small scratches on his nape and shoulders. Soobin peppered her neck with love bites while she rode her high, relishing the way she shook on his arms and snugged him close.
She tugged at his hair after calming down, pushing his chin up and getting nose to nose. It could be the post-orgasm haze, but she had the urge to say some crazy and cheesy things. Instead, she bit her lips, wondering what she should do next.
“Do I… S-should… Can I… Can I suck you off?”
And because she sounded vulnerable, he pushed past his own needs and tried to make her feel safe again. “I don’t know. Can you?” His eyes shone with mirth, the joke outdated and a bit annoying.
Her mouth tugged in a small smile. “May I?”
He wanted nothing more, but it seemed too much for her in one day, so he shook his head. “No, love. I think it’s best we go slow.”
“W-wait, why?!” She looked disappointed. “Don’t you… Want me to?”
“I do, love, I really do. But this is not about me.” He sighed. “This is about showing you that you can seduce any guy you want, doesn’t matter if you think yourself unexperienced or not… And judging by my pants now, I’m sure we can say you passed the lesson.”
Mentioning his pants wasn’t his best idea, because her eyes fell to his sweatpants and lingered there, glossy, hungry. He felt something clench around him and realised his fingers were still inside her. Blushing a bit, Soobin took them off, musing if it would be too extreme to lick them. However, he was trying to avoid getting hornier, so maybe…
Before he could react, the oven beeped, warning them that the last tray of brownies was done.
If one year early someone told her she’d dream about her best friend’s dick, Y/N would die of laughter. Now, sweaty and frustrated, she woke up for the second time in two days ten minutes before her alarm set off… Thanks to a wet dream.
With Choi Soobin.
It was upsetting, really. She couldn’t stop thinking about it – couldn’t stop wishing he had let her help him too. Because his kisses and his fingers had made her feel so good, so it was only natural to want to return the kindness… Although, a tiny bit of her was thankful he set boundaries, for she wasn’t sure she could handle what would’ve happened. The way he said she left him with a hard on was enough to make her mouth dry, heart skipping a beat in some sort of… Elation. She felt proud, desired… Feminine. And it had been ages since she last felt such emotions.
It was dangerous.
Choi Soobin was dangerous, and she should thread him carefully.
She went to the gym, wasting her energy on the weights and cardio. Maybe if she got too tired, her body would finally let go of that ridiculous desperation towards her best friend. The mere thought of having his hands on her again, of having her hands on him too… She almost tripped on her feet while leaving the gym. Chuckling at her own embarrassment, she started walking back home.
Then, her phone chimed with a notification.
Breathing slowly, Y/N unblocked it.
[08:12] 🖤 💓 darling dearest 💓 🖤: good morning, darling
wanna grab breakfast?
im near ur house
[o8:12] y/n: good morning, my better half
i literally just left the gym dskflfksdkljsd
and im FAMISHED
as always, u read my mind
[08:12] 🖤 💓 darling dearest 💓 🖤: meet u at that bakery around the corner?
[o8:12] y/n: sureeee
With a satisfied smile, she was glad for finally spending quality time with Yeonjun. Since the whole ‘Trying to date Donghyuck’ thing, Y/N kind of prioritised Soobin’s company…
Now, she had a chance to be herself again.
The bakery they usually went when Yeonjun was with her was quite empty when she arrived. Getting a table near the big windows, she discarded her jacked and sat down, relaxing. Checking her e-mails, she quickly answered two urgent ones – which meant she could come to work a bit late, ‘cause her online meeting at 10am was cancelled.
Soon, arms circled her neck and she heard the smack on the top of her head.
“Hello, darling.”
“Hello, dearest.” Y/N grinned. “Don’t kiss me when I’m sweaty, it’s gross!”
“I don’t mind it.” He chuckled, sitting in front of her. “Did you order something already?”
“Nah, I was waiting for you. What do you want?”
“Hmm… Coffee and something sweet. You?”
“Tea and something sweet.” She winked. “I’ll need scrambled eggs, though.”
“Milk tea?”
“You know me too well.”
However, instead of smiling back at her, Yeonjun frowned. “What’s this?” He pointed to the side of her neck, then down her collarbones that showed up a bit on her gym clothes.
“What?” Y/N tried to see what grabbed his attention.
“Is… It’s a fucking hickey?!” His mouth opened in pure shock, then stretched in a wide smirk. “Well, darling, you’re keeping secrets now?”
“N-no! It’s not like that!” She shushed him, flushing. “This is nothing.”
“Oh, really? Because all these years we’ve known each other, it’s the first time I’ve seen you with a hickey, so pardon me for not eating up your bullshit.” He rolled his eyes. “Soobin told me already.”
“Of course he did.” Y/N gritted her teeth.
“I mean, everyone kinda know there’s something going on. You guys aren’t exactly subtle.” Yeonjun chuckled, moving over the table to pinch her cheek. “Cuties.”
“There’s nothing going on! He’s just helping me out with…” Under his soft gaze, she hesitated.
“Is it still that excuse?”
God, she loved Yeonjun with all her heart, but sometimes… Sometimes he just really pissed her off. It was a rare occurrence, but when it happened, Y/N wanted to punch him right in the face.
“What excuse? He’s really helping me with Donghyuck.”
“I see.”
“You don’t believe me.” She pouted.
“I literally said ‘I see’!”
“You used your condescending tone.”
“It’s just because I don’t understand how him giving you hickies is gonna help with Hyuck, but don’t mind me.” He raised his hands in surrender. “So, how’s the conquest going?”
“Uh… Good. I mean, kinda good. We’re gonna try a new approach in a different ambient.” She sighed, not sure if she could voice out what happened two nights ago. “In a party, to be precise.”
“Oh, and why’s that? No, wait, let me order our food and you tell me everything.”
She smiled tenderly at him, the annoyance vanishing quickly. “I love you, you know that, right?”
“I do.” He chuckled, standing up. “As you should.”
“Prick.”
“I love you too, my favourite drama queen.”
“Milk tea and the fudgiest chocolate muffin, please. Don’t forget the scrambled eggs!”
“Noted. I’ll be back in a second.”
Y/N stared at the street, trying not to let Yeonjun’s words worsen her confusion.
Working as a translator gave Y/N the advantage of flexible hours and working from home. What once felt like a benefit, now didn’t. She went about half a chapter before giving up. There was no use, her head just wouldn’t focus enough.
Opening the group chat with only her girl friends, she invited everyone for dinner. She needed some time away from Soobin, and needed some purely feminine company.
It was past eight when Felicia arrived. She was the last one, so they could finally declare that the night officially started – good wine, a huge charcuterie board, cheese and chocolate fondue… And…
Well, Soobin’s brownies.
Y/N made sure not to linger on that thought, not to let the memory of how she got them cloud her senses (again), because it went against the mood she had planned for the night.
And it would’ve worked if said boy could read her mind. Unfortunately, he couldn’t – for her phone vibrated and indicated a text message from him.
[21:12] binbin🐰: so u had breakfast with yeonjun…….
AND invited the girls over WITHOUT us
(gyu and i)
[21:12] y/n: yeah, i did. why?
[21:12] binbin🐰: why do u hate me? 🥺
(us*, gyu is also pouty)
[21:12] y/n: where does this come from????
r u unwell?????
[21:12] binbin🐰: u havent talked to me the whole day
cant i miss my best friend?
[21:12] y/n: ofc u can
but u r never clingy
so i got concerned
[21:12] binbin🐰: well, im clingy now
[21:13] y/n: oh
[21:13] binbin🐰: yeah
[21:13] y/n: id invite u but tonight’s strictly girls night
[21:13] binbin🐰: come over later
[21:13] y/n: cant
[21:13] binbin🐰: 😨
why??????
[21:13] y/n: idk when they’ll leave
[21:13] binbin🐰: idc
come anyway
She blocked her phone, feeling her stomach tightening.
“Well, that’s… Sweet, I guess?” Mimi murmured, staring at her.
“Were you reading everything?!”
“I couldn’t help but read.”
Y/N opened her mouth, torn between being offended or asking Mimi what ‘sweet’ actually meant. Obviously, seeing Soobin that night wasn’t a smart move.
“So, how’s the ‘Donghyuck’s Annihilation’ going?” Felicia questioned, bringing her back to reality.
“What kind of title is this?” She giggled.
“It’s more dramatic, which suits you.” Fel shrugged. “So…?”
“How’s ‘Soobin’s classes’ going, you mean.” Haena quipped.
“I’ll let you know Donghyuck and I sometimes talk to each other through DM’s, and I’ve been more comfortable around him, so it’s going pretty well.” Y/N cleared her throat, feigning indifference.
“Oh, that’s nice.” Felicia smiled. “Feeling comfortable around him is important.”
“Soobin thinks we should meet at a party, ‘cause the change of atmosphere might be good and might make Hyuck look at me differently.”
“Hmm… Makes sense.” Haena agreed. “But what about your shyness? Would you be ok with kissing him and even sleeping together?”
A quick flashback of what happened at Soobin’s kitchen made Y/N blush, but she played it cool. “Yeah, I think I’d be fine. Maybe I’d pass out from nervousness, but I wouldn’t hesitate.”
Haena stared at her for a second or two, sipping her wine. “Then I’m glad you decided not to listen to us and pursue your crazy plan with Soobin’s help.”
“Can we stop talking about this? Yeonjun also interrogated me today and I really wanted to have a night-off.” Y/N pouted. “Why don’t you girls talk about your love lives, for a change?”
“The biggest change here is you getting out of your shell, but ok.” Felicia pointed out, grinning.
“Ya’ll not ready for my girlfriend era.” She chuckled.
Matter of fact, Y/N wasn’t exactly ready for that herself.
Around midnight, she finally laid down, skincare routine done and warm bedsheets. Plugging her phone on the charger, she sighed and opened her chats. It was a new day, so she didn’t need to pretend not to think about Soobin and Donghyuck again.
[00:09] y/n: asleep?
It took her some minutes to get a reply.
[00:12] binbin🐰: im not talking to u
[00:12] y/n: why’s that?
[00:12] binbin🐰: u didnt come
[00:12] y/n: the girls left and i had to clean up the mess
[00:12] binbin🐰: u can come now then 😤
She pondered for a second, but the alcohol made her reckless – or she wanted to believe so.
[00:12] y/n: can i, sir?
how?
Soobin typed and erased a few times before replying.
[00:14] binbin🐰: ???
what the fuck do u mean
r we talking abt the same thing???
[00:14] y/n: probably not
[00:14] binbin🐰: im talking abt u coming downstairs
[00:14] y/n: im talking abt what happened the other night
Another pause.
[00:16] binbin🐰: y/n
[00:16] y/n: soobin
[00:16] binbin🐰: lets keep this convo PG
[00:16] y/n: i dont want to
[00:16] binbin🐰: why not?
[00:16] y/n: ‘cause im slightly tipsy and super frustrated and angry
u didnt let me suck u off and now im one step behind
what if hyuck wants me to suck him off?????
[00:16] binbin🐰: then u suck him off
[00:16] y/n: what if im not good at it?
[00:16] binbin🐰: bullshit
[00:16] y/n: how do u know
[00:17] binbin🐰: i just do
[00:17] y/n: how
[00:17] binbin🐰: u gonna have to trust me in this
[00:17] y/n: nope 😌
[00:17] binbin🐰: would i ever lie to u? no
so stop worrying and go to sleep
[00:17] y/n: im not worrying
im frustrated and angry
ill spend the whole night watching blowjob videos and taking tips
bc u didnt help me like u promised!!!!!
She was sure she crossed a line that wasn’t supposed to be crossed, but it was too late.
[00:18] binbin🐰: stop being a brat for once in ur life
i mean it
[00:18] y/n: 😌 nope 😌
The vibration caught her by surprise. ‘Binbin’ lighted up her screen like some kind of hypnosis.
“Don’t.” His voice cut the silence.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t watch porn, it’s not helpful at all.”
“It might be more helpful than you at the moment.”
He sucked in a breath the same way he did whenever Beomgyu got on his nerves. “How much did you drink? You’re not easily intoxicated, so stop with the attitude.”
“I drank enough to be bold and ask for it… Again.”
There was a tiny silence, then a sigh. “Tomorrow. When you’re fully sober.”
Tomorrow, it was.
When Y/N entered Soobin’s apartment the next night, she brought hot chocolate for them. An apology gift, if she was being honest, for bothering him with her needy rampage. Not that the ashamed feeling was enough to keep her dirty mind at bay.
Nonetheless, it was easier to pretend she was there to learn how to play Overwatch than to learn how to suck dick. Donghyuck wasn’t a League of Legends guy like Soobin, however, Y/N had no interest neither in one game nor the other – she only needed to know the basics so she could try to strike conversation and maybe actually join them in one of their gaming meetings.
Sitting at the chair beside his one, she listened to him explain about the history and purpose of the game. It was always endearing to witness how talkative he became whenever he talked about the things he liked, and so she couldn’t help but fondly let him go on with the monologue.
Some time later, they started playing, but Soobin was too close, his long fingers typing the controls with ease while his attention was glued to the screen. Y/N told herself she was only looking at his hand because it was necessary. She didn’t have any other thoughts on her mind but learning the commands. She didn’t care how good those slender fingers felt inside her.
She couldn’t possibly care less that they curled just right and reached her spot with as much ease as they typed the keyboard. She obviously didn’t mind the fact they weren’t inside her right now.
“Stop! You’re trying to distract me!” Y/N groaned.
“I’m literally playing for you.” He quipped. “How is this…”
“You keep moving in a quick pace, knowing I get distracted easily. I can’t focus!”
Soobin frowned, trying to understand her mood swing. “It’s not my fault we have to be fast!”
“Still.” She pouted, chin up.
In those days following their new agreement, Soobin learnt something about Y/n: she had quite a temper when horny – as if it offended her that she felt any type of emotion, something similar to the way she behaved whenever she was fighting back tears.
And her flushed cheeks could also mean anger, of course. It would make sense. However, her glossy eyes and dry mouth had nothing to do with anger.
How could he be so sure?
Because he felt as restless as her. The moment she showed up in a black satin pyjama set, he realised his mistake. Now he knew that she was pantie-less, and now he also knew what she looked like without any piece of clothing on.
And now he wanted to see her again.
“Why are you so antsy?”
“I’m not!” Her pout grew bigger and he couldn’t help but grin. “Why are you smiling?”
“You’re cute.” He chuckled. “Come, try it instead.” Putting his hands over hers, he guided the mouse through her. “Press this for shooting.” He indicated once again, moving his finger over hers. “Like this. Good.” His voice dropped an octave. “Focus, love.”
He felt the shivers on her skin, and desire shot through him too.
“H-How do I enter there?” Y/N gulped as he pushed some hair off her shoulder.
“Use the mouse.” But instead of moving with her, he let go, lightly tracing her arm from the wrist to her elbow. “Atta girl.”
Fuck.
Any resolve of focusing vanished after those two words. Y/N felt her stomach tightening, heart picking up a beat. “What now?”
The proximity was tempting, and Soobin found himself giving in.
“While gaming… Things can get freaky.” His voice was low and raspy, enticing. “And people can get creative, you know? Maybe cockwarming, just to spice things up. Or a blowjob…”
Was it supposed to make her mouth water like that?
“Would you ask me to?”
Soobin held the impulse of correcting her, of reminding her this wasn’t about him, but Donghyuck. However, since he was the teacher, he told himself it made sense. “Do you want me to?”
Her chest rose with a deep intake of breath, as she tried to find her own voice. “Yes.” His lips found the column of her neck, leaving love bites all over. Y/N moaned, tightening her hold on the mouse. “Bin, I can’t concentrate.”
“Shall we move it to the bed?”
She didn’t need to be told twice. Leaping from her chair, she found some comfort in the mattress. Soobin chuckled, closing the game and following her. Matching her eagerness, he kissed her in an urgent pace, trying to placate whatever hunger grew within him recently – whenever he had his hands on Y/N, to be more precise.
It didn’t take much for their bodies to intertwine. Hips against hips, they moved in synch, chasing some kind of relief. Touching her under the pyjama shirt, he scratched from her lower back to her waist, then rested on her boobs, cupping them.
His touches and the friction made her belly tug, her panting growing more erratic by each second. “Bin, Bin, wait. Wait.” She tried to stop, but her body had a life of its own. “I shouldn’t…”
“What?” Pinching a nipple, he relished on her breathy moan.
“Oh, please, don’t.” Her hands came to his shoulders, ready to push him off, but instead they just clawed against his t-shirt. “I’m supposed to be giving you a blowjob, not humping you like a needy teenage girl.” But it was so good. So, so good. “I can’t come now.”
“What if I want you to?”
Yes. “No, please.” Y/N groaned, the words escaping without control. “If I don’t have your dick in my mouth any time soon, I might honestly go berserk.”
“That bad?” He couldn’t help but chuckle, a small smirk gracing his face.
“That bad.” She agreed. “You don’t understand, I thought about it since…” Well, fuck, she was already in too deep, so she better make the best of it. “Ever since the kitchen episode.”
God, she made it hard for him to resist. “Really?”
“I even had wet dreams about it.” Y/N stole a peck. “Twice.” Another one. “So, you see, this is quite serious. I’ve been frustrated and horny… And now I’m so wet and bothered I might cry if I don’t get to suck you in less than two minutes!” She wasn’t lying, for her eyes turned glossy.
Donghyuck was going to be a fucking lucky bastard.
“Hey, no.” He held her cheek tenderly, pecking her lips too. “No need to cry, I’ll give it to you.”
“Now?”
“Now.” Soobin stole one last kiss. “On your knees for me, love.”
Y/N admitted she never loved such words as much as she did then.
Getting between his legs, she pushed his t-shirt up until his belly button. The outline of his underwear showed, and her mouth watered. Leaning down, she peppered feather kisses on the skin above it, feeling his abs hardening. It made a rush of power and satisfaction wash through her, elated for getting him that way. Tugging at the hem of his trousers, she pushed them down, bringing the underwear too – and she gulped at the sight.
Well…
Oh.
Well, God help her, for that man was handsome in every angle.
His dick sprung free, big, rosy, hard and veiny. And she didn’t waste any more time, welcoming him inside with a smooth, swift move.
Full on her mouth, heavy on her tongue, salty on her taste buds, Choi Soobin was perfect. Y/N wasn’t sure what made her wetter: finally sucking him off, or the way his head was bent backwards, throat exposed as his Adam’s apple bobbed with the moan he let out.
“Fuck, love, it’s so warm.” He rasped. “I’ll tug at your hair now, ok? So I can set a pace. Or do you want to do this alone?” He looked down and she shrugged, quite unsure of what to choose. “Let’s do it together, then. I want you to feel comfortable too.” Threading his fingers on her hair, Soobin pushed her head down a bit. “Open up a bit more, love, let me go deeper.” She obeyed. “Like that, yeah.” He closed his eyes for a second, relishing on the feeling. “Are you alright?” Y/N tried to answer, a muffled ‘mhm’ coming out instead of a ‘yes’. “Good. Do you think you can handle a bit of gagging? If I thrust and it hits your throat, will it be ok?”
He was so gentle with her, it was really sweet… But Y/N didn’t mind roughness. Replacing her lips with her hands, she swallowed a bit of drool. “We can try.”
“Tap my thighs if you feel any discomfort.”
“Don’t mind me, just let me make you cum.”
She lazily sucked his tip, jerking him off as she pondered the best way to take all of him. Relaxing her jaw, she let go with a ‘pop’ and took a deep breath before fully sucking him again. The grip on her hair tightened, forcing her head down with more strength than before. His dick slid easily, as if her mouth was made for him, welcoming his length.
“Fuck, love.” He groaned, borderline insane. “Fuck. Keep going.” Each time she bobbed up and down, she took a bit more of him until the gag came. Tears burned her orbs and her throat closed, making her cough loudly. “You good?”
“Good.” Y/N agreed. “Let me try again.”
“Are you sure?”
“Guide me.”
He moved forward, crowding over her and holding her jaw. “Breathe through your nose and hold it each time you sink. It helps.” He caressed her lower lip. “Here, try with my fingers.” She opened, feeling his thumb first, sucking on it slightly. Then, he took it off and gave her his index, so he could go further. His digit was slender, bony, but she felt the gag anyway. “Don’t breathe as you go down, love. Right, take it easy.” Y/N obeyed, holding her breath. “Like this, yes, perfect.” She reached for his dick again, mimicking what she was doing on his finger. “Fuck.” He let out an amused laugh, raspy and short. “Can I add one more?”
She shook her head, welcoming another one. It was honestly easier that way, but at each stroke of her wrist, she grew restless – she wanted to taste him again, wanted to hear his grunts, and see the way he looked like when he came. So, instead of waiting for him to tell her what to do next, Y/N pushed his hand away and focused on his cock. Soobin remained quiet, letting her do whatever she wanted. She gathered some saliva, spitting on his tip and smudging it with her thumb. He held back a groan, fluttering at the feeling of her caress.
“I wanna do it now.”
“Go on, then.” He barely finished speaking when she started sucking him again. Keeping in mind how and when to breathe, she was able to take him easier than before. Soobin’s eyes darkened, enamoured by the sight. “Like this, go slow. No need to rush.” She looked at him through her lashes, encouraged by his words. Drool pooled on her mouth, making her gag just a tiny bit when she got past half of his shaft. “You’re doing so good.” He praised. “So good for me, love.” It was enough to keep her going, a little more confident than before. He finally hit her throat and she gagged, but instead of stopping, Y/N bobbed her head up and down once again, trying the pace and the whole move. “Fuck, I might need you to suck me off every day now.” He chuckled, reaching for her hair again, not forcing her face, but keeping some kind of pressure there.
Y/N really did her best. Every time he hit her throat, she ignored the discomfort and the tears, because the pretty, quiet moans he let out were too divine for her to care about anything else. However, as his hips started moving on their own, the quicker they got, the harder it was to conceal her breathing… So, she had to stop. She decided to focus on the tip, sucking and licking at it, while her hand pumped his shaft up and down.
“Where?” His voice came out strained. “Where should I come, love?”
She frowned, pondering. Unbuttoning her shirt would take ages, so the most logical place was… her mouth. Well, she couldn’t deep throat yet, but she obviously could swallow. Besides, she knew boys liked stuff like that. Not bothering to answer, Y/N sucked him with renewed disposition.
It was the way she refused to step back, warm palm against his skin, delicious and wet lips on his tip… Soobin had been waiting for that since the kitchen episode. So, when his orgasm washed over him, he wasn’t sure what felt better: the sheer pleasure of finally cumming, or the whole experience. At the moment, it wasn’t his best friend between his legs ‘trying’ a blowjob so she could do it on her future boyfriend. Y/N was a pretty girl with a perfect mouth and an eagerness to please that would make any boy weak on the knees.
And when their eyes met, the lustful haze not as thick as before, Soobin couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so satisfied with just a blowjob.
“Sorry I couldn’t take it all.” She broke the silence, disappointed. “I wish I…”
“Don’t worry.” He cut her off, ready to say ‘We can try again next time’, but the words died before reaching his tongue. There wouldn’t be a next time. She was supposed to do it with Donghyuck, not him. However, it wouldn’t be the same. Donghyuck probably didn’t have a big dick like he did. It was such a petty thought, but it was better than acknowledging the pang of jealousy Soobin felt at the perspective of Y/N deep throating his friend. “You were perfect.”
The small smile that graced her lips made his heart clench. “Oh, you don’t have to…”
“Trust me. You never got a blowjob, so trust me.”
She chuckled. “Alright.”
And because he was still in a haze thanks to the pleasure, Soobin pulled her up by the hand. “C’mere, let me take care of you now.”
Y/N went to him like a moth to a flame, without resisting. Their mouths collided as she sat on his lap, melting on the kiss, burning with it. Before he could lay her down and finally get those pyjama’s pants off, someone knocked on the door.
“Yo, bro, what are you doing?” It was Beomgyu’s voice. “You’re marked as ‘away’ on the group chat, but… Oh. Ohhh.” He giggled. “Is Y/N in there?”
Y/N shook her head in fear, signalling a ‘No’. Beomgyu wouldn’t let her live if he knew he interrupted them… And she wasn’t in a good mental state to take the blow.
“No. I was just watching anime.” Soobin thanked God his voice sounded normal.
“Ah, alright. How about LoL?”
“Coming right in.”
“Ok!” They heard his steps vanishing towards his own room, and sighed.
“I better go, then.” Y/N tried to stand up.
“Wait, no. Why?”
“I don’t want to see Beomgyu now, and you gotta focus on your game.” She cleared her throat, forcing a smile. “C’mon, don’t be difficult.”
“Alright.” He sighed again. “Alright.”
Trying to avoid any embarrassment, she reached for the door, pondering what to say.
“Thank you, though. It was… Really nice.” Oh, how cringe!
“The pleasure was mine. Literally.” His eyes got smaller as he grinned.
“I’m glad.” She glanced at him one last time. “Night, Bin.”
“Night, love.”
Y/N’s breath caught, the nickname ringing in a different tune now. Almost bolting out of the room, she took the stairs instead of the lift, desperate to be alone.
She needed to get Soobin out of her system, and the slick mess on her pyjama’s pants had to be addressed by thoughts of tanned skin, adorable moles and a heart-shaped mouth… Although her mind kept recalling a roguish smile and dimples – which was annoying, since they belonged to…
Felicia and Y/N had left the Pilates’ class ready for their Friday brunch. She liked spending time with her friends, she recharged in their presence; however, this time she just wanted to be quiet. She had no idea of what to do with her thoughts, the flashes of last night occupying much of her head and making it so hard to focus on anything else.
“You’re not even listening.” Fel sighed.
“Of course I am!” Y/N retorted.
“So what was I saying?”
She gulped. “You were…” Luckily, her phone vibrated with a new message. Shaky hands, she ignored the tighten on her heart at the name on the screen.
[11:28] binbin🐰: party tomorrow
time to try our new strategy
Tomorrow.
Oh.
“What is it? You look… I don’t know, stunned?!” Felicia frowned.
“Soobin texted. A-apparently I’ll try to seduce Hyuck tomorrow.” She looked at her friend. “I might… I might kiss Donghyuck tomorrow, Fel.”
“And this is good, right?”
“Of course!” She smiled.
It was. Despite de unsettling feeling on her stomach.
Working went as smoothly as she could make it, now with two growing worries haunting her. Mimi noticed she was acting weird and called for help, which came by the form of take-out and Choi Yeonjun. There was nothing her darling dearest couldn’t mend, heal or sort out.
They were in the middle of an ‘Attack on Titans’ episode when she broke the news.
“I’ll try my next step with Hyuck tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Yeonjun turned to her, interested.
“Yeah.”
Something in her expression made his heart clench. “You nervous, darling?” He asked softly.
Eren’s screams while fighting against titans were a great demonstration of how Y/N felt the whole day. She was confused, frustrated and anxious.
“Nervous, yeah.”
“Why?”
“Got a lot on my mind.” Y/N took a deep sigh, cheeks flushing. “With Soobin things are easy. I don’t feel anxious, nor insecure. On the contrary! I feel… Seen. Cared for. Special. It makes sense, right? He’s my best friend.” She shook her head, as if trying to sort her thoughts. “I-I know what you’re thinking: friends don’t… Friends don’t do what we do. But he is just helping me, because I am desperate. I still like Donghyuck. I really do.”
“I know, darling, you don’t have to explain anything.” Yeonjun took her hand, giving it a tender squeeze. “I believe you, and I’m always on your side.”
The thing was… She was starting to doubt herself.
part two out now!
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