#I think I'm gonna take a tumblr break
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♫ Babeyyyyyyyyyyy, I'm your man (don't you know that?) You bet! If you're gonna do it, do it right! Do it with meeeeeeeee ♪ ... pocket-sized Tai and Van so it's easier to keep them safe 😊
#yellowjackets#van palmer#taissa turner#taivan#yellowjackets fanart#harun art#some art during the breaks i take when i'm not working on a commission#there's this edit of van with this song and it's just! it's stuck on my mind#and ppl are right#that song is van's song!!#ugh if i don't find it on tumblr i'll repost it here (crediting the og editor/creator ofc)#i'm gonna do a second set with 1996 tai and van with their outfits right after the crash later#also maybe put these up somewhere as stickers bc i think they'd look cute??
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hello angels/lovelies/sweethearts/babes!!
the middle of april is always Very Difficult for me so I'm probably not gonna be active on here much/definitely will not really be horny posting in the next couple weeks! so I'm kindly asking that y'all don't send me too many horny asks/messages til things are better (tags on reblogs are always welcome but I'm not gonna be very social through asks)
anyway, just wanted to say that I love y'all very much n y'all make my heart happy!! I love my little community that I've found!!
#that's on what? my ever present grief cycle babeeeey#I always get nervous that I'm gonna get deactivated when I'm not on here bc.. it's happened so many times before lol#as always I'll have my queue going & would love if my mutuals sent me any of their posts that i miss#but yeah! taking a mini break i think?? i know I'll still scroll on here bc tumblr is the one app i use lol but I'm just taking a step back#kind messages are always welcome :) I'm just Going Through It and don't want to be performative#does any of this matter?? probably not but im gonna post it anyway#angel rambles
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listening to ASMR again, WHY DO THEY KEEP KILLING OFF MY FAMILY??? WHAT DID THEY DO?? THEY COULD BE ALIVE? THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE PLOT YOU JUST KILLED THEM OFF FOR FUN???
#radioislisteningtoasmragain#also sidenote getting REALLY into hero villain dynamics and I'm literally about to break out my villain oc and put her in a story here#i swear once I get over my weird social anxiety thingy I will BE UNSTOPPABLE#I WANNA BE ONE OF THOSE WRITERS WITH THE COOL OCS THAT PEOPLE LIKE RAAAAA AAA AA A A A A A A A A A A A A A A#SOMEDAY MY TUMBLR WRITING PIPE DREAMS WILL COME TRUE hopefully I gotta get my shit together soon because apparently I'M GOING TO COLLEGE???#the fact that I'm likely going to be a BUSINESS MAJOR SICKENS ME no offense to business majors but I have not heard good things#I'm taking my GED this year and then college next year i think but uh I'm shit at studying#I genuinely think something's wrong with me because WHY CAN'T I STUDY LIKE A FUCKING NORMAL PERSON#and I can't even ask for help because I SHOULD KNOW THIS BUT I DON'T#I'm smart I know I'm smart I just can't BE smart school wise anyways#aAA A A A A A A anyways enough with the tag rambling back to cleaning my room because it's starting to look like an episode of hoarders#and I need to snip that hoarder mindset in the BUD because its not healthy#I'm gonna take a nap after this
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Me, who's an anxious and sensitive auDHD that feels absolutely scared of watching anything Inside Out related that isn't from the only Pixar account I see, scared of having a heart attack:
#not that I don't like fan content or something but I'm just too sensitive about it#I'm just scared of seeing anything of the second movie that isn't from my one trustworthy Pixar account#disinformation and all of that#people talking smack#but maybe I just need to go to sleep#my anxiety's through the roof rn#I think I'm gonna take a little break from my videos to take care of myself#So for now enjoy me posting texts here on Tumblr :D#(Sorry if I'm being completely insane rn like I said my anxiety is going crazy wanting to give me a heart attack)#vent?? i guess
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man.
#💭 — ⌗nervo rambles . ★#gonna say I'm venting a bit (kinda of a lot)#but I may seem selfish from this and let me say now ik everyone was putting themselves first (which is a very good thing)#but having three mutuals deactivate their accounts within I think two months or so??#I rlly don't like to be negative and I might also take a break from Tumblr (as much as I love posting here#so I'm still unsure if I'll even stick to that) bc of how negative I've been lately#I just don't want to keep venting and putting that on everyone so#but yeah I just. It makes me sad to see old/new mutuals go#I never thought I'd have to like#witness it#Idk#I've cried over losing them all and it feels rlly silly but I mean idk#I (try to — my feelings with crying are iffy and I hate admitting I do cry) not cry over everything but I just can't word stuff rn#might be posting less/not posting at all for the next few days or so#I'm gonna be busy in July anyways so it's probably better to just say that now#sorry guys I'm just dealing with some stuff mentally lately (an example being gender dysphoria but I can't even word the stuff going on#not to sound like I'm overexaggerating bc I rlly don't wanna seem like I am. It's nothing too serious so don't#be worried at all pls I'm ok enough I won't just disappear)#I just wish I could have alone time in my room with my cats without my family bugging me for a few days#It's tiring atp#I wanna lock myself up just to recooperate and figure out how to deal with certain things the best I can#anyways yap fest over I'm gonna go play wuwa and build Jinshi more#sorry for venting again 🫡🫡
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note to self: post more alex closet cosplays when i need a pick me up/ego boost.
thank you to everyone for being so nice to me 🥹
#this wasn't even the planned photoshoot for later!#anyway some things i wanted to say#1) i'm not single sorry folks#also fun fact like right when i got back on tumblr after a break for my wedding was when we had the surprise miles 505 in london#2) i cannot take credit for anything about matching al's body language bc i really do just stand like that ksdjflsk#3) for real my posture is Not Good and there are frankly some hilarious candids of me that are just the exact same mannerisms#4) i personally think it helps with the resemblence with that i'm short and have a very uh androgynous body shape? similar proportions#which was not on purpose i assure you#there's a really funny couple pics i sent to blacktrickle the other day just like IS THAT WHAT I LOOK LIKE FROM THE BACK? bc it was Him#5) gonna do like a bunch of eycte outfits in one post one day
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okay I got feelings out of my system. I'm a changed man now.
#lack of sleep and annoying opinions on twitter is an awful terrible mix#nothing annoys me more than peoples insistance on things (right or wrong) and go online publicly to argue about it#i think fandom#i think what im trying to say is fandom in a lot of aspects just annoys me#ppls insistence on what canon is#not letting ppl just have fun and talk about hcs or whatever#not letting ppl breathe#idk like i know i say a lot of stuff on here#but no matter what i say or do i never ask or want to be the end all be all of a character or a property or smth#because yeah i know im wrong sometimes i know ive got hcs that dont match up with the intendes vision or whatver#i just like having fun#and sometimes fandom spaces make me want to blow something up#honestly I'm just gonna take a break from twt#maybe even tumblr until i can play reload#i need to go back to limiting my social media to only tumblr and stuff.#small circle. no tags. just screaming into a void#its perfect#okay rant actually over now#I'm a changed man
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It's amazing how quickly you can make someone turn on your company by making a stupid and insulting move
Force me to go through the front door and scan my card when I have backdoor business that never needed a card before (what? ...I was going to somehow... sneak in and... purchase things with a borrowed card? ...which I totally can't do from the front door after scanning it?)
Or like... twitterify your layout right after your users give you a bunch of money just cause they like you, and then refuse to walk it back
...or all the other things companies do that just kinda piss people off and then they refuse to acknowledge maybe it sucks and is stupid cause "hey, the customers didn't leave"... yeah... yet
#legit; as small as it is it gives me a hint at the direction things will head and that costco will get more and more anti consumer#and I'm in minutes going from an 'I love costco; it's how I afford to eat; go get a cheap pizza'#to 'you know costco is kinda frustrating and annoying and I don't trust their ceo... I'm not sure if it's worth your time and money'#like look back and; tumblr search willing; you'll find posts of me singing costco's praises; literal free advertising#cause while it's not right for everyone; man is it so much cheaper than places like walmart#but... I legit don't know if I can recommend it anymore#for one thing; when I signed up I just spotted the members desk; walked in the backdoor up to the desk; and gave them money#now... what? you gotta ask permission? I feel like there's a chilling effect on wanting to join... at least for my socially anxious ass#and again; I just whiff this as like when games companies add DRM that breaks the game... for people who actually pay for it#they're making me suffer a pain in the ass for no reason cause someone might not be giving them money#and now that person never will give them money... and frankly... if they don't pay the membership but spend $500 how much did you lose?#but like I said; I feel it in the air; that costco will start doing more and more anti consumer stuff#...do I think it's a good idea to join up when they're gonna slowly start turning this corner?#I mentioned that quote by the founder about killing them if they raise the price of the hotdog#but... the fact the founder felt the need to say that to begin with told me something#kinda gotten the impression that the ceo is greedy as hell and wants to drain the consumer (so... a normal ceo)#and this just smacks of netflix/disney#oh... did you hear about disney killing someone with a food allergy despite being told about it multiple times like when the dish arrived?#and now disney is trying to forced arbitrate cause they had a disney+ trial in 2019#you hear about that one? cause that's a real news story; I'll find you an article if you don't believe it#anyway; this smacks of cracking down on password sharing to make up for hypothetical lost revenue#and let me tell you... if I could switch to pirating my groceries I would; I would download eggs#so this doesn't change costco fundamentally; but it does make it feel more hostile and like it doesn't trust me#it makes things feel more adversarial instead of like a partnership where they get me good prices on good things and I give money#and I just wouldn't be surprised if they start doing more things I don't like#things that make things worse... things like raising prices to increase their profit#...makes me want to... work on figuring out how to make everything myself since no company is trustworthy#they'll all turn on you in the end; the moment the wrong person takes charge they'll start to metastasis#towards the cancer of infinite profits#not saying don't go to costco... I'm saying don't get attached if you do; I think they're ready to do what every company does these days
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I don't know what's going on with me and why I haven't interacted much here and why i haven't done things i used to enjoy even if i want to
#🌙 gio talks#actually i think i literally know why#gonna vent a little here#i have so many amazing mutuals and so many mutuals who are also writers and i really wanna read their works because i like them and their-#writing style but after being away from tumblr for like a month or so and seeing that so much happened and that i wasn't here#like i feel bad for not being here even though i know it's not my fault and that i shouldn't push myself like this#and i feel overwhelmed because it feels like I'm trying to juggle too many things at once that i end up doing nothing at all#i should probably take one step at a tie3#time*#but there's always a voice on the back of my mind saying 'you should be doing more'#'why haven't you done anything'#I'm still working on how to break free from this cycle and inertia#this also applies to my life outside tumblr#i guess one thing leads to another#anyway#i am... trying
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hello i think schools giving students more work during the holidays and having assessments due during the holidays should either be illegal or at least regulated in some way. like i don't think that's ok. that is the student's downtime to take a break from working. that is THEIR free time to relax that schools are taking up with more and more work to do after the term is finished and done. students are already overworked and burnt out as is, and their weekends are already taken up by either more work, jobs or extracurricular stuff. school can be incredibly strenuous on the workload they churn out when the students are actually going to school. a stack of homework can take hours per night, and simple assignments can take weeks to finish. people can't just keep doing that all the time, they need a stress-free break with no obligations to rest their minds. that is the reason the holidays are there. they're not an excuse for schools to cram in more and more work because "they'll have more time", students need a break otherwise their brains are literally going to stop working properly. let them take time off ffs.
(the same goes for teachers. teachers shouldn't be made to constantly work during the holidays, they deserve a break too. everyone deserves a break.)
#this is the reason i am against school#students deserve breaks#holidays are NOT a time to cram in more work. people need breaks.#humans NEED to rest their brains otherwise they're going to short circuit and burn out. they won't have the functioning to do any work if-#-they keep having to constantly do more and more and more all the time. people are not robots.#this is the reason i dropped out#there was so much work being given to everyone during grades 11 and 12 that i was constantly stressed tf out and my brain was-#-literally not working properly from the amount of work they were giving us and the fact that it takes me more effort to do an assignment-#-because of my neurodivergence. doing work in school terms was already putting me at my limit and when i learned they were gonna start-#-giving us work during the holidays my brain broke. so i stopped working and just left.#school already took up enough of my free time doing hours of work every night as is. i was NOT gonna do more during the holidays. fuck that#i actively refuse to do work during my time to relax and take a break. holidays are for relaxing not working. idiot#and like it wasn't just simple homework. they were giving us entire assignments to do during the holidays that we should have been-#-actually doing in class but weren't because of shitty scheduling. it was the school board's own fault we were doing holiday work.#idk man maybe i'm biased because i'm against hustle and crunch culture but i think holidays should be a stress-free time away from doing-#-any work whatsoever. or at least only a tiny bit of work and that's it. i don't think making people be ''productive'' all the time is ok#doing nothing and not being productive after a long string of work is healthy. let us do it. goddamn.#school#student#school issues#school is hell#<- most accurate tag on tumblr#breaks#downtime#hustle culture#overworking#burnout#apologies to those who follow me for jetpack joyride and are getting posts about schools and overworking lmaoo
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Sam Reid saying he likes to turn off his phone and literally go touch some grass. We all should do this
#i think i'm actually gonna do this and stay mostly away from tumblr because for the past few weeks#every time i come here i'm so anxious it's like alarm bells blaring in my head#so i'm trying to take a little break (which for me means probably that for a couple of days i will be here a little less than usual)#.txt
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Just as a head up, I might be closing my askbox for a bit just because my life irl has been pretty hectic and overwhelming lately and sometimes getting asks stress me out even when they aren't negative in any way. I haven't fully decided if I'm gonna close it, but if it randomly closes don't get too alarmed, I just need a little break.
#i'm also thinking about taking a small break from tumblr but again i haven't decided#if i'm gonna do that or not#i just wanna give people a heads up just in case i disappear for a little bit
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i have never been this thoroughly fucked re: writing a paper imma be honest lads
#taking a 10 min tumblr break to throw up scream cry and peruse(sp?) the dash before i go back to it#so many of my friends have had bouts of like Not being able to get a paper done and asking for like week+ extensions#and obviously i have never shamed them bc i Get it but also it had never actually happened to me until Now#my draft was due tuesday at 11am#it is now technically friday at 2:23am and i have a More Proper Draft due#i have not gotten to the actual paper part yet and am still chipping away at annotations#it is a 7-9 page paper#i have to have it turned into the writing center at 9amish#i'm gonna die here i think!#garbage.txt
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no longer taking a break :)
#delete later#i don't wanna go into why i felt like i needed to take a break#but i /think/ that all that was sorted out#plus i missed y'all#so i'm back#im gonna keep tumblr notifs off though so just keep that in mind if you message me or send me an ask
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#i may(?) take a break from reblogging here for a while. or at least not be as consistent here.#whenever i step away from this blog to use another tumblr account of mine#i always send posts to myself from there to here to eventually reblog it#but i always notice it feels forced. like the fun in reblogging for me comes from the authenticity of my response in the tags and all.#and if that response is delayed until i finally DO reblog the post it feels like i'm making it up yknow?#and then it would feel like i'm only reblogging all of these posts out of habit & to maintain some sort of “presence”.#i just feel like being more intentional of how i use social media a little more#for the time being i think i'm gonna at least be using my art account (nanmernoe) more#i love this particular blog (turbo-enid) sm#it's my first tumblr & i've had it for over 10 years!!!#i think i just wanna get out the habit of using it for hours on end.#i'll experiment and see how this goes!#ramblings
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i want to write so bad but i am so eepy
#tumblr is a hobby and i am not obligated to do things. but also like i want to do them SKDJKNSD#i have high muse. no time or i'm too tired when i do take breaks. this is nothing new but it is no less annoying smh#i had enough energy to replenish my queue a little and thats it#which. also i am lowkey running out of saved posts so i think i'm gonna leave that on 1 a day again for now#probably just going to stare at my drafts but uh rattling things anyway#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc
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