#I talked to this teacher before summer started and he was on board

[potatocatullus]

istg this teacher...

[sweets3rial]

the tutor in dorm 24B

inspired by this request

meantutor!re2!leon x fem!reader

summary: you have no choice but to go to your math professor for help in the class. unfortunately, he can't help you. but he knows a certain blonde that can, top of his class, perfect scores on everything, just the tutor for you.

tags: college!au, math/stats terminology, ooc leon, leon is an asshole, leon & reader have attitudes, dom!leon, slightly jealous leon, degrading kink, praise kink, leon talks you through it, smut, p in v, unprotected sex (use safety guys!), oral sex, cunnilingus, clit stimulation, teasing, etc.

word count: 9.8k 🧍‍♀️ (this shit long sorry)

math is horrible. you’ve never been bright in math, plus it isn’t fun. it’s only fun when you understand what you’re doing. especially statistics, which is a whole other level for math. there are symbols, very important definitions and strategies, formulas and techniques, very precise calculations and data.

you never understood what the teacher was writing up on the board when you’d step into lecture. he moved fast and spoke even faster, you’re hands would cramp trying to keep up with him and you’re notes were a jumbled mess.

even if you tried so hard, you just couldn’t understand. your mind was constantly running, like a hamster on a wheel though it was nonstop. it was the same schedule pretty much every day. you wake up, rush out of your dorm, race to class, get to class huffing and puffing, and you do this three more times for your other classes.

then after a long day of learning, you’re off to work at the cafe down the street. it’s a very famous cafe, especially with it being so close to campus. convenient for students who needed work and wanted a nice coffee.

after work, you’d go back to your dorm on the brink of passing out, but of course, you had to study.

it was a constant look, a constant cycle that seemingly never broke until summer break. your days were starting to blend together and you were slowly driving yourself insane. at one point, you put stats at the back of your mind since you were so focused on an essay for your english class.

little did you know that you’d pay for that in the future. you missed one class, one lecture - and it seemed like you missed a whole semester.

you went to class the next day, after turning in that very important essay, and you were completely lost. you tried talking to your classmate about what the professor was talking about but she was just as lost as you.

if you thought stats was hard before, it’s even harder now. you looked over your notes from before, trying to correlate those to the ones now. though, nothing made sense.

that led you to where you are now. a week later, still very much lost, and you’re grade dropping with every single assignment.

you toyed with the drawstring of your sweats, blinking your dry eyes and nibbling at the dry skin of your lip. you were trying so hard to stay awake as your professor scrolled through your grades. his eyes were squinted and his knuckles pressed to his lips.

he had a pensive look on his face, looking from your scores and back to you.

you could practically read his mind. it was embarrassing and shameful. he took off his glasses with a sigh and turned his chair to face you.

“you were doing really good in the beginning but after chapter three i mean,” he paused gesturing his head over to the computer where the D’s and F’s lined up like a pattern.

“what happened? chapter three was so long ago why didn’t you reach out?”

you never understood why some professors didn’t take students' lives into consideration. some professors think that students have no life while others are very considerate. this professor wasn’t one of those professors.

he didn’t understand why his students couldn’t understand his material or why people asked stupid questions. even though, at the beginning of the semester he mentioned:

‘even stupid questions are good questions’

then when that stupid question is asked. he sits there with a disappointed look on his face and quite literally embarrasses that student in front of everyone. which is why, you don’t ask questions at all. you don’t want to be embarrassed, especially not in front of 30 other people.

“i’m sorry, my life has just been really hectic lately and-“ you rambled, running your hands over your face with a heavy sigh. until, of course, you were interrupted.

“no worries, i understand but,” he paused again, judging you with his eyes and completely ignoring the fact that you were on the brink of a mental breakdown. “you gotta reach out for help if you need it.”

even if you tried, it probably wouldn’t help. his teaching methods are like tough love. harsh but it’s supposed to teach you a lesson. spoiler alert, it never does.

he reached over for a pen and a sticky note and you watched him scribble down a few numbers and a name.

“i can’t really help you since my life is also hectic,”

alright, asshole. you’re the fucking professor you should be helping me. you said to yourself, never in your life did you want to slap someone so bad,

“but i can refer you to one of my top students.” he pushed the sticky note toward you. you picked it up and read the name at the top, his dorm number, and his phone number.

great, just what you needed a tutor.

you weren’t sure how exactly this ’top student’ was passing this class with flying colors and it was to the point your professor was impressed. which he never is and never was.

either this top student is sucking your professor's dick behind the scenes or is actually insane.

you read the name at the top as your professor began to speak.

“his name is Leon, he’s gotten perfect scores on every quiz and test, very smart and a decent kid,”

yup, Leon is definitely sucking this man's dick.

Leon’s contact info and his dorm room were written underneath his name. it was odd that he didn’t tutor in the library like the rest of the tutors did. though, given the fact he’d rather tutor in his dorm, he probably isn’t a tutor at all.

“i contacted him before our meeting today, he’s expecting you.

“oh, okay.” you nodded slowly, pocketing the small slip of paper. you weren’t so sure if you were comfortable being alone in a random dorm with some guy you’ve never met, but for the sake of your grade you were willing to do so.

you finalized your meeting with your professor and left his office even more unsatisfied than when you came. you were hoping he’d give you a run down on what you missed but instead, he completely dismissed you to his top student.

you left the building phone and slip of paper in hand, you weren’t sure if you should text him or not. ultimately, you decided it could wait. you were exhausted and maybe a small nap would be helpful rather than going to this guy's dorm where you probably wouldn’t learn jack shit.

—

Leon waited for you. he was told to expect you around the afternoon, so he canceled his plans with his friends, he went home to his dorm, tidied up, and put on a more suitable outfit. he never wanted to be a tutor it was tiring trying to teach someone something over and over again.

plus, he had doubt in his skills as well. he would be to blame if someone were to get a bad score or if they failed their exam.

but when his stats professor made a deal with Leon, he decided to take it. if he were to tutor you and possibly future students, he’d put in a good word with any police academy he wanted to join.

Leon wasn’t so sure how his professor would get that to happen but it was better than nothing at all.

so he waited, half an hour went by and then an hour and another. at this point, he was tired both physically and mentally. he sat leaned onto his desk with an elbow, tapping his pen against his notebook. it didn’t take long for him to catch the hint that you weren’t coming.

and just as he was about to strip his clothes to take a nap, there was a knock at his dorm door. his hands dropped at his sides and a sigh left his mouth, though he tried to maintain a calm act even though he was close to bursting into flames.

he was irritated, you were two hours late, he was already drained from a long day of sprinting around campus for his classes and he just got dumped not too long ago. he does not have time to be in a good mood.

albeit, he still opened the door with a smile.

“hi, you must be-“

“yes, i’m so so sorry! i know i was supposed to be here hours ago,”

Leon let out a small laugh, mumbling under his breath, “yeah, you were…”

unfortunately, you heard that part, and your heart dropped. at first glance, this guy looks like a sweetheart. he had a nice face, his cheeks a little round but his jaw very defined and sharp. his eyebrows were relaxed and a thick brown, and his dirty blonde hair was split down the side and a little long — the ends just touching the height of his cheekbones.

his lips were plump and a nice pink, glasses were perched up on his head and you guessed he was probably wearing them earlier.

his chin had a small indent, a little butt chin almost. he had two beauty marks on his throat, right on his adams apple, and a few small ones on his face.

he wore a basic dark blue sweater, even with the baggy fabric you could still tell his shoulders were nice and broad and he paired his sweater with basic grey sweats.

he was very attractive, tall, and muscular but that baby face was throwing you off. it wasn’t a bad thing, rather it was intriguing. how are you supposed to focus when there’s a very attractive man tutoring you? maybe your professor is secretly setting you up.

“oh god, i’m so sorry. i probably should’ve gotten your number from our professor,”

“uh no worries, just come in.” he said in a hurry, opening the door further for you. you nodded to him a thank you and stepped inside.

his dorm smelt of fresh mint and lemon, there was a hint of spice in the air as well. it was pretty warm, which made you guess the heater was on.

he shut the door behind you, walking past you as you stayed in the doorway to slip off your shoes. you took around the room for a second. his bed was up against the left side of the room, away from the sight of the door. dark midnight blue sheet, with a matching duvet and pillowcases.

underneath his bed were a bunch of bins, probably clothes and extra storage. against the back wall was his desk, piles of papers and different books were all stacked neatly at the side. the large window above the desk allowed a natural hue of light to cast down into the room, giving the room a pale yellow glow.

against the other wall was a dresser and closet. his room was very generic, with some posters and photos taped to the walls and a whiteboard with messy scribbles depicting his schedule for the week.

“so uh, how much did the professor tell you?” he asked, sitting at his desk chair and swerving around towards you and he lowered his glasses down to his eyes. you took a few steps further into his dorm, adjusting the tote bag on your shoulder.

“um he just said to meet you here and that you could help,”

“well no shit,” he scoffed, catching you off guard and sending a tense feeling through your muscles. “did he say what you needed help with? which chapter? which concept?” he asked and each time you shook your head like a dumbass.

“i’ve kind of been struggling the whole semester i just-“

“why didn’t you get help earlier?” Leon asked curiously, tilting his head to the side. unlike your professor, who seemed actually concerned this time. but that concern was probably for himself instead of you.

“i was embarrassed, i guess,” you shrugged.

he sighed, dropping his head and nodding his it up an down.

“okay well, uh please sit anywhere really uhh,” he got up from his desk chair and walked over towards the other corner of his dorm. there was another small chair in the corner, albeit a bit old, and he brought it over to his desk.

“sorry, i’m not used to visitors.”

“no worries,”

you sat down on his old chair and placed your tote bag into your lap as he opened up his computer. you watched as he brought his glasses up in front of his eyes and opened up the course page. “so uh, what did you need help with?”

his tone was harsh, almost like your professors. you felt intimidated by him, he was smart and quite rude.

“um well, everything?” your answer sounded more like a question, causing him to raise an eyebrow up at you.

“i’m sorry, i can’t help you with everything,” he spat, turning his shoulders towards you with one elbow on his desk. “give me specifics, like which chapter?”

“every chapter, it just isn’t making sense to me and i-“

a sigh left his lips and his shoulders slumped, you could practically hear the thoughts running through his head. “alright well, i can help you with the first chapter,” he said with a shrug.

you nodded along, reaching into your bag for your notes.

“the first chapter is pretty basic. basic terminology and techniques we use throughout the class, ‘kay?” he began, speaking with his hands as he went. you nodded at him, placing your notebook at the edge of his desk and writing down what he just said.

anything counts, anything you could get would help. you needed to get a good grade in this class, if you had to retake it for the credit it would be a disaster.

“it’s mostly the types of data, the collections of data, the types of sampling — and those are the basics.” his eyes flickered from his computer down towards your hunched figure. you were writing down every single word he spoke. you’d repeat his words to yourself in silent whispers.

then, as you finished writing, you looked up at him and waited for him to continue but he was left speechless. you really were desperate.

“tell me, do you know any of the terminology in chapter 1?” he asked, turning his full figure towards you. doing so, his knees were now touching yours. he didn’t miss the way you scooched back further in your chair to avoid his touch. cute.

“uh,” you hummed to yourself as you flicked through your notes and back to chapter one.

“no, no,” he stopped you, placing his hand over yours and bringing it back down into your lap. “tell me from memory, not from your notes.”

he watched you blink at him as if you were processing his words slowly, “uh yeah, i can do that.” you leaned away from his desk and your notes and faced him, your knees touching his again.

“i know sample versus population,”

“give me an example of both.” he cut you off again, leaning back into his chair and adjusting his hips.

“um, a population will be all the college students of our university but a sample would be just the engineer students,”

“good, at least you know that.”

you gave him a nervous laugh, a little more proud than you should be but his praise made you feel … good.

he continued to make you list what you know, making sure you knew every term by giving him real-life scenarios and every time you got it correct it was like a golden sticker was placed on your forehead. you were beginning to understand and, as ridiculous as it sounds, you were starting to have fun.

relating the different terms to real-life situations made it easy on you, rather than the unrealistic scenarios your professor gave you.

he let out a loud yawn and you caught a whiff of his minty breath, he’d been chewing on mint gum for the past hour now. throwing an old one away and popping in a new stick. you could tell he was getting tired, he was less responsive and blinking slowly.

“i think you should get some rest,” you told him. he looked over at you with a small ‘hm?’ before shaking his head, blonde hair sweeping over the bone of his brow and lips curling down into a frown.

“i’m fine,” he practically shouted out after another yawn, “let’s just finish it, ‘kay?”

“no, Leon, it’s okay we can continue another time.”

he stayed silent, his lips pursed as he looked down at your notes. gradually, his head began to bob up and down into a nod and another yawn left his mouth. this time, he stretched back, letting his sweater glide up slightly to reveal a sharp v-line and brown happy trail.

you quickly looked away and began to pack up your things, shoving your notebook and pencil case into your bag — not even bothering to shut or zip anything up.

“man, look at the time,” he said, lifting up his sleeve to reveal a black watch. “next time be on time, that way we have more time.” he smiled at you as you stood up.

you weren’t sure whether to take that as a friendly reminder or a warning but either way you nodded.

you made your way towards the door, slipping on your shoes and looking back at him to say goodbye. you expected him to still be seated at his desk or even going to lay on his bed. though, to your surprise, he was standing directly behind you.

hands stuffed in the pockets of his sweater.

“jesus!,” you jumped, “sorry, you surprised me.”

“uh, who else do you expect to lock the door behind you?”

you blinked up at him, again caught off guard. he was a little bipolar with his attitude, one minute he’s proud of you for getting something the next he’s making fun of you with his eyes.

“well, goodnight,” you said to him as you stepped out the door, he didn’t say anything else. he kicked the door closed and locked it the moment you stepped out.

you could feel your eye twitch, only if you could march back in there and beat the blue out of his eyes but he was just a tutor. just a few weeks of this and then you’ll never have to speak to him again.

-

“are you serious? we just went over this,”

“i’m sorry i blanked out,”

“no, you didn’t i was watching you giggle on the phone with that little boyfriend of yours,”

“first of all, why are you watching me? and second of all, i wasn’t on the phone with any boyfriend.”

he sighed, leaning back into his chair and crossing his arms over his chest. “i wasn’t stalking you, dumbass. your bright ass screen caught my attention and when i looked over voila it’s you.”

he leaned forward, pointing a finger at your face and squinting his eyes behind his glasses, “and who else would have you giggling like that in the middle of a lesson huh?”

to be honest, he didn’t like that you weren’t paying attention, it was more work on him because you always came crying to him about not understanding a topic. he didn’t necessarily hate tutoring you. sure, you guys had some fun times but it was beginning to become a part of his everyday life.

canceling plans on his friends, not going to the gym, and missing out on his personal time. his goal was to teach you and go over a chapter every week, it was working … slowly but surely.

“i saw a funny video, ‘kay?”

“wow, so you’re just sitting in class watching silly videos. no wonder why your brain is rotten.”

“hey, asshole, the professor wasn’t even talking about anything important. it was more about his dumbass grandkids,” you rebutted, grumbling your words toward the end of your sentence.

“if it wasn’t anything important, how come you don’t know what he just fucking talked about?” he said with a scoff.

you groaned and began to pack your things, you probably should’ve done this a long time ago. sure, Leon helps, but he belittles you in every way and it’s beginning to actually hurt. his rude comments and attitude.

he was like a hawk or a vulture, hovering over you every second of the day and then picking at you when you were alone. slowly tearing at your skin and ripping off flesh until he got to bone. he was always watching you.

you couldn’t go on your phone in class to check a text or even walk out early because he will know and will say something about it later. maybe it was time for another tutor.

“whatever, Leon. you’re not helping anymore.” you scoffed his way as you stuffed your computer into your bag.

“that’s where your wrong, your grades have been getting better, haven’t they?”

“what are you? my dad? you’re checking my grades now?”

only if he wasn’t so stupidly handsome, you would probably smack him across the face or maybe choke him out. there was something about Leon that you liked, unfortunately. he was intriguing, he knew so much about you but you didn’t know anything about him.

he wasn’t in the frat, thank god. he was smart and had a large group of friends. you always caught them hanging out in the private study rooms in the library, the ones they always made sure to book. they all would stay there and hang out like obnoxious fools.

it was rare to see Leon smile and laugh, he looked like a completely different person. his eyes gleamed differently and he had a specific glow around him. maybe the reason you saw him so much in public or outside of his dorm was because you looked for him.

you looked for him and that glow.

“i’m not, the professor told me.” he watched as you continued to pack, were you really leaving? was he too harsh? sometimes he was only ‘mean’ to you to elicit a reaction from you. it was cute to watch your jaw drop and your fingers twitch as if you wanted to hit him.

sometimes, you played along, insulting him back. it was amusing to watch your spark glow into a flame. he hated tutoring but he didn’t hate you.

“of course, you practically suck that man's dick during office hours,” you said to yourself but loud enough to let him hear.

“that’s hilarious,” he said, rubbing at his nose bridge where his glasses sat.

“you didn’t deny it.” you huffed turning to leave until you were, very abruptly, yanked back. his hand had wrapped around your wrist, holding you back from leaving.

you turned back to him, his head was tilted to the side and he silently motioned with his eyes towards your seat.

“sit, we’re not done.”

his tone sent chills up your spine but you still refused, only if he didn’t look so damn good.

“yes, we are.”

you yanked your wrist away from him but much to your prevail, that only prompted him to stand up, grab you by your hips, and push your right back down into your seat.

“no. we are not.”

you sat still, bag in your lap, eyes wide and lips shut. did he just…man handle you back into your seat?

he sat back down in his seat after you, rolling his jaw with a sniff. “where were we?”

you remained silent and still, you knew if you got back up to leave he’d only pull you back down into your seat. though, you would be lying if you said you didn’t like it. the minute his large hands fell onto your hips there was a burn that ran through you, and it wasn’t rage.

“what is variance?” he asked turning towards you.

“standard deviation squared,” you replied, very straight and mellow-toned.

a smile grew onto his lips, the blues of his eyes gleaming and his pearly white teeth slowly revealing from underneath his pink plump lips. “good, you’re getting the hang of it.”

ever since then, Leon was very comfortable with touching you and kind of controlling you. tugging you by your wrists, guiding you with his hand on the small of your back, touching your legs, or shoving you to get your attention.

you were slowly losing it. you couldn’t even think straight, he was such a distraction. his voice, his hands, his scent, everything. the way he dressed was always so casual but he always looked so good, basic sweats with graphic tees or a sweater.

glasses, hair sometimes a little messy. you noticed when he was very focused his tongue would stick out from the corner of his mouth, it was cute, to say the least. he’d scrunch his nose to keep his glasses up on his eyes, he rolled his ankle instead of bouncing his leg, and when he laughed.

it was boisterous and full of light. you never thought that you could make him laugh, even if he wasn’t laughing with you rather he was laughing at you.

-

“are you serious? it’s like you don’t retain anything at all, how did you even get accepted?”

that one kind of hurt but you were too focused on the brightness in his cheeks and his perfectly straight teeth.

“well the acceptance rate is pretty high so…” you shrugged turning back towards your notebook.

you kept on denying the fact that you very much had a crush. is it wrong to find someone attractive? no, not at all. it’s a regular thing to find people attractive, doesn’t mean you have a crush on them. but this … is different.

a month and a half in you were beginning to realize you very much had a crush on Leon. you were beginning to get used to him and he was getting used to you.

you looked forward to tutor sessions now, practically dropping everything to go and see him. you began putting on extra perfume and wearing your hair down rather than keeping it up.

you kept your attire casual, you didn’t want him to think that you were dolling yourself up for him. so pajama pants or sweats were your usual go-to.

little did you know, Leon noticed everything. he was keen to snuff people out. he could smell you from a mile away, that heavy fragrance of yours was slowly seeping into his clothes and his brain. even after months, everything you touched was beginning to smell like you.

he noticed how your makeup slowly became heavier and your hair was all nicely done for him.

to be frank, he was flattered. he hoped you were getting all dolled up for him and not the guy who constantly blew up your phone. who is he? is he a boyfriend? a relative? a crush? a friend? who is he?

Leon wants to know, who do you see throughout the day? who are your friends? what do you like? do you like him? do you hate him? every time he sees your face he just wants to know, who are you?

Leon sat at his desk, waiting for you. his hands were folded up to his mouth and his leg was bouncing anxiously. you’ve never been late, well except for that first day but other than that you were always on time. always.

the pillow you occasionally sat in your lap during these sessions was now in his lap. it smelt just like you. at first, he wanted to snatch it away from you the moment you put the pillow into your lap, hugging it against you and spreading your germs onto it.

but then, it was nice. it was your signature pillow, you looked for it every time you came over and placed it directly in your lap. now, he finds himself carrying it around or having it next to him while he sleeps. is that weird?

well, it was his pillow in the first place. what’s so wrong about having it in his bed? it’s comforting.

his eyes quickly flicked over when his phone screen lit up, he looked over at it quickly reading the notification. you texted him.

was something wrong? are you sick? do you no longer need tutoring?

he quickly unlocked his phone and read the message, the pillow now bunched up underneath his nose as he slowly inhaled and exhaled your heavy scent.

‘hey, might be running a little late today :/. there’s a lot of traffic.’

traffic? where are you coming from?

‘k.’

he kept his reply short and nonchalant even though his curiosity was close to killing him. he knew the semester was close to ending, meaning he wasn’t going to see you afterward. it’s a big campus, so many buildings and so many students. he rarely sees you.

though, he catches a glimpse of you in the library, walking and talking with your friends. in the lunch hall, always getting the same drink from the vending machines and leaving in a hurry as you typed away at your phone.

you told him you had no boyfriend, but maybe you were lying to him. maybe it’s because he wasn’t a close friend of yours. that’s right, he’s just a tutor — not a friend or a love interest in your eyes.

he sat there longer than he anticipated, he didn’t realize how long he had been sitting until there was a knock on the door. he stood up, tossing the pillow in his lap aside onto his bed and rushing to the door. almost tripping over the clothes and mess that sat on his floor.

shit, he forgot to clean. he kicked the mess aside as he made his way to the door. kicking it under his bed mostly. he almost tripped on one of his shoes, letting out a small cuss before stumbling more towards the door.

the chaos behind the door caused you to furrow your brows.

“Leon? you good?”

“yeah! hold on!” he shouted out. you nodded slowly, itching at your ankle with the tip of your shoe.

Leon looked down at his attire, week-old sweats and a white sweatshirt with oil stains on it.

he turned away from the door quickly and silently ran back into his room, he needed clean clothes and he hadn’t done laundry all week. he didn’t have time, all because he was too busy thinking about you.

he quickly threw his sweatshirt off, taking the glasses off his head in the same swift movement. now he was just a mess, feeling around his bed for his glasses like Velma from Scooby Doo. all while his sweats were halfway on his legs.

“shit, shit,” he muttered to himself and he almost sighed with relief as he finally found his glasses and a clean, well decently clean, sweatshirt.

he rushed over to the door, sweat sticking to his hairline and very much out of breath. when he swung it open he was met by you looking down at your phone, texting someone once again. you looked up at him with a smile.

“what were you doing in there, huh? hiding a girl from me?” you taunted with a smile. he took notice of your outfit once you stuffed your phone away, a small wine-red top paired with some baggy jeans. you had a nice pendant necklace on, hanging right between the swell of your breasts, and cute little bracelets all up your wrists.

your makeup was done nicely, same with your hair. you were very very pretty today. you always were. but who did you look pretty for today?

“don’t be an idiot,” he scoffed, stepping sideways and letting you inside. you chuckled to yourself, finishing up your text to your friend before your phone was miraculously snatched from you.

“no phones tonight.” he snapped at you, taking a sneaky peek at your text convo. it wasn't a guy, it was a friend who was a girl. you two were speaking about a house party and tutoring. he lifted an eyebrow and looked down at you, he was completely ignoring your small grumbles of complaints.

“you were at a house party before this?”

“nosy much!” you snapped as he shut your phone off and stuffed it away into his pocket.

“answer the question,” he sighed like a disappointed parent.

“yes, i was and i ditched it to be here. with you.” you finalized.

he wasn’t gonna lie, the last part of your sentence sends electricity through his veins. you ditched fun to be here. not for tutoring. not for your grade. but to be here with him. he had no words, he was just frozen in place not sure of what to say or do.

“um, no phones today no distractions. midterm is coming up and i don’t want you to fail,” he said, clearing his throat. he shut the door softly and locked it. he turned to face you, taking off your shoes with a pout.

“aw, you care about my score?”

he rolled his eyes, shoving past you with another scoff. “yeah because your score reflects my tutoring.”

"and here i thought you hated tutoring,"

"i do, hurry up and get inside."

you smiled up at him, walking further into his room and instantly looking for your pillow. it wasn’t in its usual spot but you found it on top of his bed. his very tall bed. you jumped up, half of your body on the bed and your legs dangling off the floor.

you outstretched your arm for your his pillow. it was just at your fingertips but still out of reach. why did his bed have to be so big?

Leon watched you struggle for a bit, amused at how hard you were working just for a pillow. he also took this chance to admire how good you looked, almost perfect. bent over the edge of his bed, shirt riding up to reveal more of your back.

he couldn’t help but imagine you in this position but in different circumstances. his hands on your waist, bodies sticky and sweaty, hips rocking against one another.

he was quickly shaken out of his trance when you hit him in the face with the pillow.

“let’s get this over with, my friends are expecting me back in two hours.”

he cleared his throat and nodded with a small, “yeah.” his voice cracking in between.

it was hard to focus, he couldn’t stop looking your way. he couldn’t dismiss the burn that flew through him every time your knees touched his. he couldn’t form a sentence when your eyes would lock with his as you patiently waited for him to teach you something else.

almost like a dog waiting for a fucking treat.

the mascara on your lashes made your lashes pop more, shiny gloss on your lips, and the blush on your cheeks was nice and bright — but not too obnoxious. what was obnoxious though was your top, so dangerously low and that pendant hitting the fat of your breasts with every movement.

you were speaking to him but his eyes were focused on your pendant necklace. you took notice of it, stopping midsentence and looking down towards your necklace that he was so focused on.

“who’s the one distracted now?” you chuckled, taking out the pendant from your shirt and showing it to him.

“where’d you get it from? a boyfriend?” he asked out of nowhere. even his own words caught him off guard. he didn’t mean to ask that last part but it has been on his mind forever.

“Leon, how many times do i have to tell you?” you sighed out, leaning back into your chair and crossing your legs. “i don’t have a boyfriend.”

“then who is currently blowing up your phone?” he asked, motioning down to your phone constantly buzzing in his pocket.

“my friends,” you said with a shrug.

“i don’t believe it.”

“well, you should.”

“what could they possibly want to talk about?”

“you,” you said, looking from your phone lighting up in his pocket then back up at him.

you watched his eyebrow raise in confusion and he tilted his head to the side once again in disbelief. but you nodded slowly leaning towards him.

“they think you’re hot,”

“oh really?”

“yes, really.”

he scooted closer to you, both of his meaty thighs now trapping yours. his pupils dilated as he looked into your own. instantly, your palms began to sweat. you crossed your arms over your chest, subconsciously trying to shoo away the goosebumps rising onto your skin.

“what do you think then?” he asked, his voice low and his eyes flickering down to your lips and staring there.

“of?” you answered with another question.

“you think i’m hot?” he was inching closer closer, surely this was another way to tease and taunt you. even so, your heart was beating out of your chest and you were shrinking away from him.

“mmm not really, you’re kinda ugly.” you lied. that was the biggest lie you’ve ever said out loud. you haven’t even admitted your little crush to your friends. you were denying it to your core but right now with him so close like this, his breath fanning against yours and his hands placed on either side of your chair — you were ready to give up.

“liar.”

“not a li-“

before you could say anything else, his lips were on yours. soft plump and warm. wet from the amount of times he’s licked over them with a hint of mint from his gum. you kissed him back, leaning forward to press your lips against his even more.

your entire body lit up, you could feel your knees grow weak and the butterflies in your stomach felt more like a wildfire. with every smack of your lips, there was another spark and more of that fire spread.

his hands found your waist, tugging you up off your chair and towards him. you accepted his instruction quickly and obediently. he pulled you into his lap, hands moving from your waist and towards your hips.

his thumbs rubbed at your skin, calloused fingertips colliding with your soft skin. hot and gentle. you moaned onto his lips, tilting your head to the side and bringing your hands from his shoulders and towards the nape of his neck.

shivers ran through him at your touch, the cold sweat on your fingertips and your manicured nails scratching at his scalp.

he ran his hot tongue along your bottom lip and you welcomed him. tongues finding each other in a heated and passionate battle. you moaned at the minty taste on his tongue practically melting into him.

his hands found the small of your back, pressing you closer to him until you could practically feel his heart beating against yours.

he reached down into his pocket, bothered by your buzzing phone. he threw it to the side and onto his desk, he couldn't care less where it landed, he was more focused on you. your gloss stuck to his lips, it tasted fruity like cherries and he could taste the smallest twinge of rum on your tongue.

he pulled away, one hand grabbing the back of your neck to keep you in your place, “drinking and driving, huh?”

you rolled your eyes, rolling your hips down into his, “it was just one shot.”

you kissed him again, feverishly. you were hungry and desperate, you never wanted someone so bad. even if he made you feel like shit, pretty privilege at its finest. you didn’t care if he tugged and shoved you around like a damn rag doll, it was hot.

you didn’t care if he insulted you, part of you really fucking liked it.

he kept his lips on yours as he let his hand run down underneath the curve of your ass and the other guided your thigh around his waist. he stood up taking you with him, your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms wrapped around his neck.

you held him close, both of you kissing at a slow and deep pace. in all truth, you didn’t think Leon was interested in you in the slightest but judging from the way his hands traveled all over your body you were very very wrong.

his hands reached up beneath your top, feeling for your bra clasp but he was surprised to find none. you smirked against his lips.

“no bra, fuck that’s hot.” he sighed against your lips, copying your smirk.

he threw you down against his bed, watching your hair splay out around your head like a halo. your lip gloss was ruined, smeared all over your mouth and your lips were now plump and glossy with his spit.

you looked up at him, the fire behind your eyes and adrenaline running through every vein in your body. you propped yourself up onto your elbows, slowly scooching away from him as he crawled towards you.

his hands on either side of your frame, icy blue eyes staring right into yours. his lips were now swollen and pink, some of your lipgloss smeared all over his mouth.

“where you going?” he taunted, a certain tone in his voice. his hands reached for the hem of his sweatshirt, quickly pulling it over his head and throwing it to the side along with the rest of his clothes. you scanned your eyes up and down his built figure, who knew he was so muscular.

underneath all those sweatshirts and loose tees was a greek god. chiseled muscle and wide shoulders, his arms were thick and looked as if they could kill. no wonder he could throw you around like you weighed nothing. he was built like a fucking tank.

your eyes trailed down to the happy trail, you witnessed now and then. sharp v-line, light brown hair with a single vein running down.

his hand wrapped around your ankle, tugging you down the bed until his face hovered over yours. “my eyes are here,” he told you before placing his lips on yours. your hands ran up his arms and up to his shoulders, you sunk your nails into his skin creating little pink crescents.

one of his hands kept him up while the other worked with the button of his jeans. the minute he got the metal button off, he was tugging them down your thighs and you helped by lifting your hips for him.

he kissed the corner of your mouth, then your cheek, and then your jaw. his kisses were wet and slow, his fingers playing with the hem of your panties.

“god, you’re beautiful,” he whispered in your ear, kissing your lobe. your body shook with excitement every time he touched you, your body immediately responding to any of his calls. you were under his control and his command.

“i need you,” you whispered to him.

“shh shh, how about this?" he shushed, removing his glasses and then throwing them onto his desk.

he smirked at his own idea, loving the sound of what plan just popped up into his head.

" if you get these answers correct you’ll get what you want, ‘kay?”

you threw your head back against his pillow, whining his name. he swatted your ass as a warning as he traveled down your neck with opened-mouthed kisses, “i’ll stop.”

“no! okay, okay.” you exclaimed. he smiled against your collarbone, sinking his teeth into your skin as his hand traveled up the sheets to play with the hem of your top.

“give me five different ways to collect data,” his hand traveled underneath your shirt, his thumb finding your perky nipple and swiping over the bud slowly. you shivered at his warm touch, your brain melting and your mouth opening into a silent moaning.

“answer me, baby.”

“um surveys, experiments,” you began, trying to focus on his question rather than his touch. he pinched your nipple, rolling it between his fingers as his knee slotted between your legs and pressed against the gusset of your soaked panties.

he applied just the right amount of pressure and friction to your clothed cunt, earning him a small moan.

“an observational study,”

“good good,” he praised, lifting up your top and bunching it above your breasts. he watched them spill out and bounce, “so pretty, baby. give me two more.” he placed a soft kiss over your hard nipple and watched your body squirm for him.

“focus groups and- fuck and sampling,” you whined, arching your back towards him.

he grinned down at you, one hand cupping your left tit while the other stroked your cheek. “good job.”

he placed another hot kiss over your nipple, dragging his teeth ever so slowly over your hot skin.

this was killing him more than it was killing you. but he just loved teasing you, the excitement in your body, the hunger in your eyes, and the desperation in your voice. he loved having control over you.

“what’s the formula for a z-score?”

“Leon!”

he swatted your thigh as a warning, “say it.��

you pursed your lip, watching him place small kisses around your areola, purposefully avoiding your sensitive nipples.

“x minus x bar-“

“do it correctly,”

“sample size minus the mean, divided by the standard deviation!” you whined out.

he rewarded you by taking your nipple into his mouth, harshly sucking and dragging a long whine out of you.

you’ve never been so sensitive before but he was bringing everything out of you. your hips began to grind down against his knee, the smallest amount of pressure against your clit was all you needed. you were aching for him, clenching around absolutely nothing and dripping into the gusset of your panties.

his hand was splayed over your stomach, his thumb playing with the hem of your lace panties. his lips left your nipple with a pop and he looked up at you whilst biting down on his bottom lip.

“if the mean is more than the median,” he began kissing down the valley of your breasts. “how does the graph skew?”

you couldn’t focus, your brain was mush and you were very lightheaded. you couldn’t breathe and you were aching for him worse and worse every coming second. you tried to go over his question but every kiss he placed on your skin was a distraction.

“come on, baby you got it.” he said, now completely in between your legs. his hands were running up and down your thighs, keeping them at either side of his head. he placed a wet kiss on your inner thigh, sucking and then dragging his teeth over the small hickey.

your hips bucked up and your legs began to shake, “Leon, i don’t know.”

“i know you do, baby. come on,” he hummed against the skin of your thigh. the smell of your pussy was making him dizzy, it was right in front of him and god he needed it so bad. he could see how wet you were, just for him.

he wanted to rip these pretty lacy panties right off of you and devour your pussy whole, but he wanted to wait. he wanted to wait until you were at your limit, he wanted to watch your eyes roll back when you finally got what you both wanted.

“um, it skews right!”

he smiled against your inner thigh, placing a kiss on your abdomen and then moving your panties to the side. his cock jumped at the sight of your cunt right in front of his eyes, dripping wet and quivering just for him.

“answer this next question right and i’ll let you cum, ‘kay?” he said placing a kiss over your swollen clit.

“fuck!” you moaned out, hands reaching for his blonde strands.

“what is the empirical rule? and what does every single one of them mean?” he asked, prodding his tongue at your hole. his breath was hot against your clit, your whole body was shaking to the point you couldn’t take it.

“Leon, i-“ you stammered out with a tear running down your temple and into your hair.

“come on, we just went over this yesterday.”

“i can’t,”

he gathered a glob of spit onto his tongue before spatting it against your pussy, watching it drip from the hood of your clit and over your fluttering hole. “yes, you can.” he egged on.

“it’s mmm,” you pursed your lips and squinted your eyes close, you just needed to think and avert your attention away from him. “68% falls um one standard deviation of the mean,” your statement was more like a question.

he confirmed your answer by flattening his tongue over your slit and languidly licking upwards. he moaned at your taste, practically drunk on your pussy already. he shut his lids and let his eyes roll to the back of his head.

“95% is two and 99.7% is three!” your voice raised a few octaves as the languid strokes of his tongue became faster.

he was done testing you, for now. right now, he’s focused on making you cum all over his face. his arms wrapped around each of your thighs, holding you close to his mouth as he got to work. his thumb went to find your clit, rubbing small slow circles around your swollen nub.

“oh god,” you sighed out. his tongue prodded at your dripping cunt, messily lapping up at your juices mixed with his saliva. you arched your back, your fingers digging into his scalp both pushing him away and pulling him closer.

he applied more pressure to your clit, his tongue plunging in and out of your hole shamelessly. wet and sloppy sounds filled the room along with the sound of your messy moans and chants of his name.

“fuck, so good.” he moaned to himself, completely focused on your pleasure even if his hips were grinding into his sheets. he could cum just like this, to the sounds of your moans and the taste of your cunt.

he couldn’t wait to fuck you, to feel the warmth of your walls suck him in, and the sound of your moans directly in his ear. but he needed to be patient, he needed to reward you for doing so good in class.

he picked up his pace, taking turns fucking his tongue into you feverishly and sucking on your clit. your legs shook around him, thighs clamping around him and keeping him locked in place.

“yes, Leon! i’m close,” you moaned out, drool gathering at the corner of your lips and more tears spilling from your eyes. he kept his pace, not moving faster or slower but he just applied the smallest pressure against your clit that sent you over the edge.

you cried out, arching your back and curling his sheets into your fist. with your release, stars danced behind your vision and every muscle in your body contracted and then relaxed. he eased you down from your high, sucking at your clit lightly and drawing circles over the bone of your hip.

he looked up at you, lips swollen and slick with your release. he placed a kiss on your abdomen with a grin plastered across his cheeks.

his blonde hair stuck to his forehead sweaty and hair disheveled all because of you.

“you did so good,”

your whole body was worn out, your eyes shut ready to pass out but he wasn’t done. he tugged your panties down your legs, keeping them scrunched in his fist.

“i’m not done testing you baby,” he said placing a kiss on your cheek.

“Leon, please,”

he ignored your pleading working himself out of his sweats. you caught a peep of a dark grey splotch in his sweats, either from when he had his knee placed against your heat or his dripping tip.

“get this question right and i’ll fuck you, got it?”

you nodded excitedly, biting down on your bottom lip. you watched his cock spring out and god was he pretty. tip swollen and red, veins running up his girth, thick and long. god, of course, he was big.

“words, baby. i need words.”

“yes, yes, okay!” you snapped at him, very obviously sexually frustrated. he didn’t like your tone so he slapped your clit with the tip of his cock, sending a shock wave through you.

“watch your tone, i don’t have to fuck you, i don’t have to give you a second orgasm,” he grabbed your chin harshly and tugged your head up to face him, “understand?”

“yes,” you croaked out.

he placed a kiss on your lips, letting you get a taste of your juices still on his tongue.

he ran the tip of his cock through your folds, his shoulders tensing up and his hand twisting in his own sheets. it was taking everything in him to be patient.

“how do you find the three quartiles?” he asked, pressing his tip against your fluttering cunt. you opened your mouth to answer but nothing came out but a weak moan. he watched you closely, not breaking any eye contact.

his pupils were blown out, only leaving a halo of his blue irises.

“please,” you croaked out.

“come on baby, you got this.”

you gulped down a lump, getting rid of the dryness in your throat. “the first quartile is the 25th percentile,” you answered weakly.

he pressed his tip into your dripping cunt, hissing at how your pussy was practically ready to suck him in. your breath hitched at the stretch and a tear ran down your temple, he kissed it away, leaning his forehead against yours.

“keep going baby, you got this.”

“the second is the- the median. 50th percentile, the third quartile minus the first,” you rambled, looking up into his eyes as he nodded his head.

“good, good,” he moaned out, giving you just a few more inches of his cock.

“the third one is 75th percentile,”

with your final and last answer, he thrust his cock all the way in, until his tip was kissing your cervix. you sucked in a shaky breath, your thighs shaking as you adjusted to his size. he kept his tip pressed against your cervix, stroking your thigh with his large hand.

“s- so big, fuck,” you whined out, walls fluttering around his girth.

“shh shh, take it. take it.” he whispered close to your lips.

“lower fence versus upper fence, quickly.” he was struggling to stay still, he was torturing both you and himself. you choked back a sob. you could feel his cock pulsing inside of you and god you couldn’t even think.

“lo- lower fence is the first quartile, mmm,” you moaned out.

“come on,”

“first quartile minus one point five times the IQR,”

he sighed out against his lips, grinding his hips into yours earning him a whiny moan from your quivering lips. “one more baby,”

“upper fence is, shit, it’s the third quartile plus one point five times the IQR.”

he was done.

he pulled out and then thrusted straight back in, your whole body convulsed. every tense muscle in your body relaxing the moment he thrusted his cock back into you. he cupped your cheek, bringing your lips to his. he kissed you hungrily, invading your mouth with his tongue, moaning at the taste of you.

his hips continued to snap into yours, bullying his cock into you with no remorse. each thrust of his cock stroked at your g-spot and your body would jolt from the force.

“been waiting to do this forever,” he spoke into your mouth. “fuck, you’re so beautiful,”

you moaned out his name, wrapping your arms around his neck and bringing him closer to you. his hands reached back towards your top, tugging it over his head and throwing it off the side.

he was quick to cup your breast, slotting your nipple between your two fingers and then slamming his lips against yours. you scratched down his back helplessly, the fresh polish on your nails chipping and blood seeping through the cuts you were giving him.

you couldn’t focus on anything else but him, not only did you really like him but he was also fucking you so good. his pace was perfect, his touch was intoxicating and his lips were hot.

there was a ring of white forming around the base of his cock, lewd noises spilled from both of your lips as you both found yourselves inching closer and closer to your highs.

your kiss grew sloppy and his pace quickened, “this pussy ’s so good, fuck,” he groaned out, moving the hand from your breast towards your clit.

your whole body shook once his two fingers began to draw figure eights around your clit. the slow pace of his fingers contrasting with the fast pace of his thrusts.

“god, look at you,” he breathed out, “all fucked out on your tutor's cock, huh?”

you couldn’t reply, only croaking out a moan of his name.

“fucking whore, came here for math help now look at you,”

his words only added to the tension in your abdomen, the burn in your stomach getting hotter and hotter.

“i’m gonna cum,”

“go ‘head baby, cum all over my cock,” he said, placing a kiss on the corner of your lips.

you whined out, chasing his lips for another kiss but he denied you with a shake of his head.

“i wanna hear you,”

you looked into his eyes, seeing a reflection of yourself in his glossy eyes. mascara smudges, lipgloss gone, hair a mess. all because of him.

“fuck!” you moaned out, wrapping your legs around his waist and throwing your head back. he was quick to guide your head to face him, he kept his eyes locked on yours watching your pupils dilate as you came undone.

your walls fluttered around his cock, clenching down as your orgasm hit you like a heavy wave. he pulled out quickly, finishing himself off with heavy and breathy moans.

you watched as he came. thick, white ropes of cum decorating your stomach and abdomen. his abs tensed up with each spurt of cum and his hips still bucked up.

he let out a final breath into the crook of your neck. both of your bodies shook against each other, hot, sticky with sweat and cum.

he leaned up out of the crook of your neck looking into your eyes and you watched as they gleamed, such a rare light in his eyes but you were glad you were able to see it.

he pressed his lips to yours, this time it was slow and deep. there wasn’t any hunger or lust, just pure passion.

“i’m sure you won’t fail that test,”

(divider creds to @saradika ,, photos off of pinterest & photo of leon from @/laughingwallaby on twitter)

notes: if you wanna be on my tag list pls message me hehe! or fill out the form below (just to make it easier on me :D)

taglist

[xxkissesforchanniexx]

Oh, How I Hate Him

Pairing: bad boy!Minho x student council prez!fem!reader (college au) Genre: angst, fluff Word count: 8k >.> Warnings: college idiots, mention of drinking, drugs, smoking O_O DONT DO ANY OF THAT, cringe romance, enemies to lovers, dick exboyfriend. protective Minho >.> <.< thats it i think????

a/n: did I intend for this to be smut? Yes. is it? no. do i mind tho? absolutely not someone help me come up with a better title...

You inhaled deeply and smiled contentedly as you entered the student council office.

"Good morning Ms. President." Your friend and vice president, Jia, said.

You gave her a side eye. "I said don't call me that."

"I'm sorry." She giggled, "Yuna, schedule today?"

"We have to collect signatures for lowering student parking costs and start the campaign for the cafeteria to be expanded and renovated this summer, you also have to meet with the principal to discuss how the high schoolers are going to tour the campus, " Yuna, the student council secretary and planner named off things from the list.

You nodded, "Not too much." You checked your watch, "I have a class at 8:30 and I haven't gotten my coffee yet, any of you want to come with me?"

Jia and Yuna looked at you, with are you for real right now man? faces before getting up and grabbing their bags to go with you.

You went to the cafeteria and as you were getting your iced americano, a student came up to you.

"Y/n, can you sign here to help keep our debate program alive? The district is trying to cut off our funding to have our formal debate team dissolved." The boy handed you a clip board and a pen.

You signed your name before picking up your coffee, "I'm running a little late, Yuna, can you take the papers on my desk to the principal's office?"

"Sure." Yuna picked up her own coffee and ran off.

You briskly made your way across campus and checked your watch, 8:25 AM, right on time. You entered the history classroom and smiled, "Good morning." You greeted your professor before going to sit, not too close to the front, not too far back, and not perfectly situated in the middle.

As the classroom filled, your friend, Seungmin, leader of the science olympiad team sat beside you.

"You're a bit late don't you think?" You teased, taking out your notes.

"Not everyone i always going to be as punctual as you, Madam President."

You rolled your eyes.

The chatter in the classroom died as the teacher stepped to the front of the class, "Good morning class, as you know this is the only history class you have to take to meet the graduation requirements. So, if you intend to slack in my class just know your future depends on your performance in this cl-" She was cut off.

The door opened and you looked away from the teacher seeing a man with redish brown hair and a leather jacket at the door, he had pretty eyes and small but plump lips. His eyes raked over the class for a moment before he looked at the teacher, "Sorry, I'm late."

"You are?" She raised a brow.

"Minho. Lee Minho." He said, walking into the class and going up the steps to the back of the classroom, he passed you and your eyes met. He smirked slightly and you made a face, not bothering to watch where he sat.

"I hope you won't be late again, Mr. Lee." The teacher said.

"No promises." He said.

She pursed her lips before continuing her speech about the importance of the class, where to find the resources, the books you'd need, the minimum grade you'd need to pass the final and so on. A snicker made Seungmin look over his shoulder.

Minho was sitting beside a guy with chubby cheeks and big eyes. Han Jisung, who, raised a brow at you and Seungmin as if to ask what.

The teacher kept talking and Minho and Jisung's distractions persisted before finally the teacher, who you now knew as Mrs. Jung snapped. "Gentlemen, is there something that's important enough to interrupt my lesson?"

Minho looked a bit surprised and Jisung blinked a few times.

"No.. ma'am." Minho said tentatively.

"Mr. KIm," Mrs Jung said.

Seungmin looked up a bit confused. "Ma'am?"

"Swap seats with Mr. Lee."

Your mouth fell open, SAY SOMETHING! SAY NO! ASK HER POLITELY TO RETHINK HER DECISION. "Ma'am I really think-" You started.

"As the student body president and one of the three candidates for valedictorian of your graduating class, Y/n, I think you'd be a good influence on Mr. Lee." She reasoned.

Seungmin put his notes in his bag and sighed deeply. "It's fine Y/n, we'll talk later anyway." He went up the steps and waited on Minho to collect his things before sitting next to Jisung.

You looked at Minho as he sat beside you. This was going to be a rough semester.

You went to the student council office after class to handle what Yuna had told you about in the morning and as you set your bag down you bristled, staring at the stack of papers on your desk. The same stack of papers you told Yuna to take to the principal that morning. You sighed and grabbed the papers and left the office, walking briskly down the hall and to the administration office, greeting the schools secretary before setting down the papers in the principal's office.

You went to return to the student council office, pulling out your phone to check over things when you passed the entrance to the arts department. You froze as you saw something in the corner of your eye, looking up to see Hyunjin and a guy in a hoodie.

You raised your hand and opened your mouth to wave but stopped yourself. Who was that guy anyway... You shrugged and went back to the office to handle your things.

You started counting the signatures the other members of the council left on the table, you let out a soft sigh of frustration, for people who complained about it being too much to park on campus, they really, REALLY, did not seem to mind that much.

You went back to your apartment and greeted your roommate, Doyeon, who, was sitting on the couch eating your snacks.

"HEY! Those are mine!" You huffed.

"Are they??!" She looked genuinely shocked.

You rolled your eyes and went to go change before sitting beside her and munching on the snack too.

"Oh, Yeongs-" she started.

"Save it." You said, looking at your phone.

"But he-"

"DODO!" You looked at her. "No. You told me not to be persuaded by him, you shouldn't be either."

"But he seemed genuinely sorry." She muttered.

"He always seems someway." You rolled your eyes and looked back at your phone. You got a notification from instagram suddenly.

You looked at Doyeon. "Does EVERYONE on campus have my instagram?"

She looked away from the TV, "Why are you asking so suddenly?"

"No reason." You muttered, looking back at your phone before following Minho back. He and his stupid self.

The following day Minho was late, much to your delight, you took notes and listened to the teacher for about the Egyptians and the Romans. Twenty minutes late, Minho strolled into class and sat beside you, not bothering to take out his books or anything.

"Good morning Madam President." He whispered.

"You could at least try to get here on time." You said, quickly scrawling down something Mrs. Jung had said.

"You could at least try to relax sometimes." He shot back rolling his eyes.

"If you're going to be late," You slid the first part of the notes to his side of the desk, "Play catch up."

Minho pursed his lips before sighing and taking the notes, he wrote them down faster than you expected, sliding them back to you after about five minutes and peeking at the sheet you were working on. You didn't say anything until as you were writing, he kicked you under the desk. You looked at him.

He was following along with the teacher as if he hadn't done anything. You rolled your eyes and went back to working. Minho's antics persisted until the and of class and as you were packing up your stuff you turned in a bit of frustration back to your desk to see more papers.

Minho was talking to the girl across the isle, she giggled at something he said and you grabbed the papers and pulled out a folder, arranged it neatly then put it carefully into your bag.

You were about to go when you realized your water bottle wasn't in your bag. You looked around your area for a moment before you clenched your fists at the sight of your bottle in MInho's lap.

You grabbed it and were about to leave when he held up your phone.

"LEE MINHO!" You fumed, grabbing your phone and storming out.

"You seem mad-" Jia said, steering clear of your volcanic rage as you threw your things onto the table.

Some of the members of the council squeaked and took off running.

"I hate Lee Minho." You practically growled as you sat in your chair.

A few days later you had worn a pair of heels for a meeting and they had been hurting your feet. You grimaced slightly while getting your coffee and Hyunjin sighed.

"You don't have to wear those shoes y'know." He sighed.

"I have to build habit." You huffed.

Yet when you got to class you really wished you didn't have to "build habit". But you wouldn't admit Hyunjin was right either. So you suffered through the entirety of class and somehow made it to the student council office. The moment you sat down and sulked over your feet you got a text.

You looked at your phone and rolled your eyes at the sight of Minho's contact. You ignored the "You look like you stepped on a lego" text and tried to turn to your work when another text came to your phone.

"Don't ignore my texts." followed by a "Call down your guard dog."

You stared in confusion for a moment before opening your phone and responding finally.

You opened the door to see Seungmin glaring at Minho.

"Y/n tell this hooliga-" He started.

"What do you wa-" You interrupted Seungmin only to be cut off by a pair of slippers being thrusted into your face.

"Wear comfier shoes. You look like you've been in pain all day. Idiot." Minho turned on his heel and walked away.

You blinked in shock for a moment. "Did he just.."

"You give her the slippers?" Hyunjin asked as Minho blitzed into the dance studio.

"Yeah..." He relaxed as he realized he was safe. He must've looked like an idiot. But when you were leaving the campus that evening Minho saw you and Seungmin walking to thee latter's car. A small smile came to his face as he saw you were wearing the slippers.

The next few months were packed for you, your teachers piled work on you like there was no tomorrow, and you wrote essay after essay. Business with the student council wasn't much better as Jia got sick with something and the campus tour date was coming closer and closer.

And Minho? Oh how you hated him. You hated the way he walked and talked and how he seemed to understand things without reading too much. You hated how he smirked at you in the hall way and how he got under your skin.

"I'm going to assign you your first project of the semester," Mrs Jung said from the front of the class.

You sucked in a breath and looked at your already stuffed bag, full of books and papers for your other classes.

"You will work in pairs." She said, "The rubric and criteria needed are online, if you have any issues feel free to ask me. I will assign partners now."

You exhaled shakily, Please don't be Minho. Please don't be Minho Please don't be Minho-

"Kim Seungmin and Baek Soojin," She said, "Han Jisung and Park Junho,"

Please don't be Minho!

"Soo Dokyung and Jin Sungwoon."

GOD IM BEGGING PL-

"L/n Y/n and Lee Minho."

You wanted to die on the spot.

"Woulda look at that prez, we're a team." Minho whispered, smirking at you.

You bit your lip. This wasn't so bad, he seemed pretty good at turning in his stuff on time and was mostly accurate. You had everything under control. You took a deep breath and looked at him. "If this is going to work we need to distribute the work fairly. So, I'll research the fall of the roman empire and you research the rise, we'll have a document to collect references and-" You head throbbed for a moment and you grabbed your forehead.

"Are you okay?" Minho tilted his head, brows furrowing.

You nodded, "I'm fine."

Only you weren't because after class you went to the student council office and sat at your desk.

"Y/N are you okay?" Yuna asked as you held your head, sucking a deep breath before continuing with your work.

"Yeah I'm good." You said taking out your computer and getting ready to work.

"You look a little pale.." She muttered.

You still got to work on your research though, Yuna left after a while, telling you to take care of yourself and relax. Earlier than usual you finally decided to head out, calling a cab and-

"What's the president doing here so late?"

You looked at Minho, who was carrying a duffel bag and his keys. "Work," You said, looking at the road waiting for your cab.

He stared at you for a moment. "Are you okay?"

You turned to him, "Why are you so concerned if I'm alright today? I'm fine, thanks." You said a bit harshly.

He made a face, "You just look really burnt out. It's late, let me give you a ride."

"I already have a ride on the way, Minho," You shut him down fast and he pursed his lips.

"Whatever you say, Madam President." He walked away to the parking lot and you couldn't help but feel a pang in your chest, like you'd gone too far.

Your cab came and you made it back to your apartment, Doyeon was the third person to point out your sickly appearance but the only one who actually made it to feeling your head and gasping at how hot you were.

"What the hell Y/N?! Are you trying to kill yourself?!! Come on!" She dragged you to your bed and made you put your stuff down and change before getting you into bed. "You aren't going anywhere ma'am." She said, "You sit here and get better, Nurse Doyeon will take care of you."

"I'd rather die." You teased.

She pouted, "Meanie."

You rolled your eyes and smiled at your friend, "Thank you Dodo."

"Of course y/nnie."

If you felt like shit at school, that was only the beginning, you whined in pain at your sore throat and Doyeon had to convince you to eat even though it hurt to swallow. After you finally finished the noodles and all the soup Doyeon made you, she made you take medicine for your throat and to reduce your fever before letting you sleep finally.

Only as you were drifting of you thought about history and mentally berated yourself for not studying ahead for the lessons. You were about to grab your laptop when your phone buzzed. A message from Minho.

Minho stared at his phone for a moment, he thought about how you seemed a but more irritable and pale and how your usual upright, perfect posture was slackened. So he did do his research that night, and looked at his cat Dori, "She's so uptight. It's not fair.."

The cat mewed softly.

"You're right, I'll give her something tomorrow." Minho muttered, "Maybe she's overworking herself. You think she likes pasta? Or maybe I should make her strawberry cake..."

In the morning, Minho was getting ready for class when his phone rang, he pulled his shirt over his head and grabbed it, answering the call.

"Hyunjin?" He said, putting the phone on speaker.

"You coming today? Changbin might come too." Hyunjin said on the other end.

"Y'know I have a project to work on." Minho said fixing his hair in the mirror.

"Man, just a few hours."

"Yeah, nah." Minho said.

"Alright, your loss." He went quiet for a moment, "Did you see Y/n yesterday?"

Minho thought about how you looked so tired the day before. "Yeah."

"I'm a little worried y'know." Hyunjin sighed. "She never says anything when she doesn't feel well. But oh well, we'll see later."

Minho thought about what Hyunjin had said the entire way to class and for once, he was on time, sitting in his seat waiting for you. The classroom filled, the teacher entered, and you... never came.

He fidgeted slightly. Where were you? For the first time since he walked into that history class—much to Mrs. Jung and Seungmin's shock—Minho took notes. He jotted down things that were important and little details on the side, he underlined and highlighted did his best to seperate definitions and dates from key material as he'd seen you do.

After class he went to the student council office. This was abnormal. Where were you? You would never miss class even if you didnt have a ride and had to walk the entire way... in flip flops (as if you ever would) YOU WOULD BE AT SCHO-

"If you're looking for the president she's not here today." The secretary said.

"Why? Is she ok-" Minho started only to stop himself, "No problem."

He went to the arts department to see Hyunjin.

"Thought you weren't coming today?" The long haired man said, taking a hair band between his teeth so he could gather his hair.

"Came to say hi, I've got work to do." Minho shrugged.

"OH, 'cause Y/n isn't here?" Hyunjin giggled as he tied his hair.

Minho made a face. "Really wanna go that way?"

"No sir.." Hyunjin laughed nervously as Jisung and Changbin walked in.

"Minho! You came! Man we c-" Jisung said only to be cut off by Minho patting his head and moving him, hands at his waist.

"I came to say hi," Minho smiled, "I'm going now, I have work to do."

Jisung pouted. "It's cus Y/n is sick isn't it?"

Minho took a deep breath. "I'll see you guys tomorrow?"

When he left he made another copy of his notes in color, hole punched them, and put them in a nice folder before he went to his apartment. He stared at his phone.

"You should text her." Chan said over his shoulder.

"Why would I?" Minho looked at his friend. "Nah." He tossed his phone onto the couch and went to the kitchen and got to work making soup.

Jeongin appeared at his side. "Whatcha making?"

"It's not for you guys." Minho said, rolling his eyes.

"Then who is it for?" Chan said, looking over his shoulder.

"Yeah." Jeongin huffed.

Minho's mouth opened and he closed it again, deciding it was better to not say anything. Somehow he managed to get the food out of the apartment without either man getting it. He drove to your apartment and went up to your floor before raising his hand to knock on the door, he stopped himself.

Stop being an idiot... he thought before knocking on the door and waiting for a moment.

A girl with long hair and big eyes stared at him for a moment. "You are?" She said, leaning against the door frame.

Minho looked at her, "Lee Minho, Y/n's friend."

"Oh?" the woman got in his face. "What exactly makes you think you're Y/n's friend?"

"I- Well-" Minho stuttered.

"Doyeon."

Minho looked past the woman at you and sucked in a breath, you stood there wearing a pair of pajama pants and a baggy shirt.

"You know this guy?" the woman, Doyeon, questioned, pointing at Minho.

"He's the guy I'm doing the project with." You said, before clearing your throat and coughing in your elbow.

"Eesh, back to bed." Your roommate started ushering you back to your room and motioning for Minho to enter.

He closed the door behind him and put the food down in your kitchen but you pulled away from Doyeon and sat on the couch, arms out towards the man.

Doyeon looked between you for a moment. "I'll uh- Leave y'all to it-"

"Minho give me the damn food." Your eyes narrowed.

He smiled slightly and looked around your kitchen before finding a bowl and spoon with Doyeon's help. He got you some soup and carefully brought it to you.

You took it from him and took a cautious sip, eyes lighting up at the taste of it. "AH! Minho! You saved me! Doyeon's food was going to kill me!"

"HEY!" Your roommate huffed.

Minho laughed. "I'm glad you like it. You could've told me you were sick. We're par- friends no?"

You looked at him for a moment. "Yeah. My fault.."

He shook his head and handed you the folder. "Catch up Madam President."

You looked at the folder for a moment before looking at him, "I- thank you."

Minho somehow managed to suppress the smile that wanted to come to his face. "Yeah, whatever, just make sure you get better, taking notes is hard." He muttered.

You rolled your eyes.

After Doyeon went to bed, Minho persuaded you to also go to sleep, he made you take more medicine for your cough.

"You'll be back tomorrow or the day after?" he asked.

"The day after probably, in case I'm still contagious." You said softly.

He hummed. "I'll take good notes then."

You laughed lightly. "Thank you really.."

"The president can't fall behind because of an illness."

You smiled. "Idiot.."

He smiled gently. "Go to sleep, I'm going to leave before your friend jumps to conclusions."

You huffed a laugh. "Okay."

"Alright... Sleep well Y/nnie." He said as he left your room.

"Good night Min..."

Minho closed your bedroom door and made his way out of your apartment, making sure to lock the door before leaving. He leaned against your door as he closed it. "Dummy..." He muttered. "Relax it's good for you.." He said softly before walking down the hall to the elevator.

You did manage to come in to class the day after and you were immediately greeted by the student council in a bit of disarray because of the upcoming campus tour.

"Excuse me!" You clapped your hands to get the people's attention.

They all looked at you before Yuna jumped on you.

"OH Y/N I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK!" She squealed.

"Schedule." You smiled at her.

"Yes ma'am!" She jumped into her her chair and spun for a moment before slamming her hands on her desk. "The high schoolers will be touring our campus the day after tomorrow, on Monday you have your speech in front of the administration and you have a scheduled meeting with a student later.

You nodded.

The people in the room stared at you for a brief moment.

"WELL?!" Jia shouted all of a sudden. "GET TO WORK WE CAN'T HAVE CHAOS WITH HIGH SCHOOLERS ON CAMPUS!"

The students started scrambling to get things done and you stood and went to history, greeting your teacher and apologizing for your absence before going to sit beside Minho.

"You're late." He smirked.

You checked your watch, you were three minutes later than usual. "You're suspiciously early."

"It's becoming a habit. You're rubbing off on me." He shuddered slightly.

You pushed him gently and he turned to look at you, as if asking you seriously just shoved him like that.

"I hope you don't rub off on me." You smiled.

Minho rolled his eyes.

Mrs. Jung started class and you kicked off quickly, you had to admit, Minho was a decent note taker.

After class you went to your office and fixed yourself a bit, waiting for the student who wanted to meet you. You opened your lip gloss and were in the middle of applying it to your lips when you heard a voice you dreaded to hear..

"Dolling up for me?"

You froze, looking at your mirror.

"Y/n?" Yeongsu said in a sing-song voice, you felt icky with how he drew your name out slowly, taunting you... "You haven't answered my calls, thought I'd pay you a visit." he grabbed the tiny cat figure you had on your desk.

You closed the mirror and looked at him. "Why are you here?"

"I got worried when I heard you were sick." He sighed, walking around your desk and kneeling, he tried to take your hand in his, "After all, you're my girl.."

You pulled your hand back roughly and glared down at him. "I am not yours. If you have nothing to talk about please leave."

Yeongsu cocked a brow. "I'm not one of your little student council members you can order around, Y/n." He stood.

"Leave." You said more firmly.

He reached his hand out to caress your cheek and you grabbed his wrist.

"Don't touch me," You said through grit teeth, "Leave now."

He stared at you for a long moment and you held your breath. Yeongsu pulled away and rolled his eyes, "You're still so uptight." he muttered, reaching into his pocket and taking out a cigarette. "That's fine," He looked at you. "I like it when you fight back."

You bristled.

He lit the cigarette and took a long drag, exhaling slowly. "If only they knew their perfect president ended up in my be-"

"Get out!" You shouted, springing from your seat so fast it hit the wall with a loud bang.

Jia opened the door to the office at that sound and stared in shock at Yeongsu.

He smirked taking another drag in the silence, exhaling and then whispering, "You're not all that amazing, Madam President."

You stared at your desk, trembling with rage as he walked out of the room.

"Y/n.." Seungmin ran in and stared at Yeongsu as he left before running to you. "Y/n-"

"Open the windows.." You muttered, the smoke choking you, no, the thought of that bastard choking you.

"Wh-" Jia started.

"Open a damn window!" You shouted before falling into your seat, burying you face in your hands. "Please..."

Seungmin ran to the side of the room and began opening the windows.

You took a few deep breaths, "Let's get ready for the tour..."

While finalizing the plans for the tour, Jia and Yuna left before you as most of the council did, you sent emails to the schools that would be coming and arranged for food for the students. You were so engrossed in your work you didn't notice the sky darkening and were only pulled out of your grind by the rumble of thunder.

You looked out the window as rain droplets started pelting against the window. "Crap." You looked around your desk for an umbrella and cursed as you found nothing in its usual spot.

You grabbed your stuff and shoved it into your bag before heading to the front of the school, you opened your phone about to call a cab.

"Y/nnie never has a ride does she?"

You turned and stared at Minho.

He smiled, holding up his keys.

In the car the only sounds there were was the sound of the window wipers and the quiet music on the radio.

"Let's go to my place, it's closer." He reasoned.

You looked at him. "Yeah, okay."

When you got to Minho's apartment he got out with the umbrella before going to your side and shielding you from the rain as you walked in. The elevator ride was quiet. Too quiet so you said, "We're going to keep researching."

"Yeah." He said, "Uh- My friends hang around here often. Don't mind them too much, they're a little um.. rowdy."

You nodded, "I don't mind."

Only when you got to the apartment you were surprised to see not one or two friends but three men and three cats.

One of the men looked up from something he was eating, "Minho, who's the girl?"

"Minho brought a girl home!?" A man with very chubby cheeks who you recognized immediately as Jisung poked his head out of a room, he froze when he saw you before laughing lightly and going back into the room.

"He did?!" A familiar voice said in shock.

You looked at Chan one of the fraternity presidents.

He looked at you, then Minho and back at you, "How did this happen?"

"RIGHT!?" Jisung called.

"We're here to work on a project!" Minho huffed, "Please.

"OHH!" The muscular man at the table looked a bit shocked for a moment. "We'll leave then, yea?"

"Yeah.." Minho rolled his eyes as Jisung and Chan came out of wherever they were and gathered their stuff.

As they were leaving the muscular man shouted, "USE PROTECTION!"

Your face got hot and you turned to the door.

"CHANGBIN!" Minho shouted.

"SORRY! Leaving now!" He called back before he finally left.

You looked at him. "Let's get to work shall we?"

He laughed slightly and motioned to the sitting area.

"Your cats are cute." You said as a dark colored striped cat came up to you.

"That's Dori." he said as you pet the cat. "Soonie." He motioned to a white and orange cat laying on the floor, "Doongie." He pointed at the last cat which was walking over to Minho.

"The names are cute." You hum as you let Dori run off.

"Someone called them old fashioned..." Minho rolled his eyes.

"Who?"

"No one important. Let's get to work."

For the most part you and Minho worked very diligently and then your phone buzzed, you gave it a glance before it buzzed again and you frowned turning it on its face to ignore it. It buzzed again and you huffed, grabbing the device.

You saw the instagram messages and rolled your eyes.

You hum and put your phone down.

"What?" Minho asks.

"Nothing." You shrug.

Parties with Hae-joo were... a lot... especially since Hae-joo was such good friends with Yeongsu.. 'For old times sake' worried you. Did Yeongsu put her up to it?

You jumped as Minho flicked your cheek. "HEY!"

"Pay attention." He rolled his eyes.

You hummed and looked back at your work.

"Is there any particular place you like?" Minho looked up from his computer.

"Not really no." You shrugged. "Maybe my bed."

He rolled his eyes. "The beach?"

"Never been." You said looking at your computer.

"HUH!?" he blinked in shock. "It's like an hour away!"

"I never have time I'm always working or sleeping. or both." You laughed lightly. "I didn't live too close to a beach when I was a kid either."

"I'll take you one day."

You stopped typing. "You serious? I don't need to go-"

"Its really pretty there. At the beach I mean.. especially at night."

You noticed the way he smiled slightly.

"Friend of mine took me and" He sat up and started typing. "It's just really nice."

"I'll consider visiting." You laughed.

That night Minho was scrolling on instagram when he got a message from Jisung.

The first thing Minho thought about was how the heck YOU of all people would actually go to a party like that.

The tour began early, the moment the high schoolers arrived you made sure everyone was on their best behavior. As you showed the students around the classrooms and lecture hall, you noticed him watching you from his seat in his accounting class.

Yeongsu was watching you as you told the high schoolers about the class before motioning for them to follow you out. You came to your history class and greeted Mrs. Jung, explaining the touring high schoolers and then you explained the class and it content and why it was a mandatory class.

"We'll continue now," You said about to leave, as you ushered the students out, Minho came down from his seat and grabbed your arm gently.

"Are you coming over later?" He asked.

You blinked a bit stunned, "No, I have to get ready for my meeti-"

He made a face, "We need to finish the project,"

"We have a few more days. It's fine." You smiled and pulled away.

"Is he your boyfriend?" One of the high schoolers asked.

Your mouth fell open, "I-"

Minho looked at you and smirked, "She's a very close friend, we're not dating."

"Oh," the student said.

You cringed as one of the girls gave Minho her number on a slip of paper. "Let's continue."

Minho looked at you and laughed lightly.

After classes you were in the student council office and you decided to visit Hyunjin in the dance studio. You opened the door and blinked a few times in confusion at someone fixing Hyunjin's stance.

"It's ugly." The person said. That voice was familiar...

"AGH! HOW!" Hyunjin fumed.

"Stand like this!" The person stood the supposed proper way.

"THATS HOW I W-" Hyunjin's mouth froze as he saw you.

"What?" Minho stared at you in shock for a moment.

"You like dancing?" You smiled slightly.

Hyunjin grinned devilishly behind Minho and tried to run away but the older man grabbed him and dragged him back.

"Yeah." He cleared his throat. "Is that a problem prez?"

You made a face. "No. Not at all. You should teach me sometime." You walked around a bit. "I just came to say hi... I'll go. Leave you guys to fix that."

Hyunjin tried to pull away from Minho who held him tightly by the forearm. "SAVE ME!" He mouthed.

You rolled your eyes and left.

At the party, it wasn't surprising that majority of the students were acting like it was a club, you squeezed through the crowd and looked around a bit.

"Ain't no way the president herself came to a party like this."

You turned and rolled your eyes at your friend Hongjoong, "Long time no see."

"How could you ever see any of us if you're always cooped up in that student council office?" A tall dark-haired man threw an arm around Hongjoong.

"You act like I'm there 24/7 Hwa." You laughed.

"We never see you anymore." He shrugged, "You don't want to associate with the riffraff of your past huh?"

"You aren't riffraff," You sighed, grabbing a soda from a table as you continued walking, "I just decided to grow up a bit."

The loud music shook the whole house and you felt it vibrating through you as you walked. You opened the soda can and took a quick sip.

"Y/N!"

You turned to the voice and smiled at Hae-joo, "Hey."

She hugged you, "Didn't think you'd actually come..."

"I didn't either, looking for a fr-" You stopped half way through your sentence and stared at Yeongsu, who was smoking in the corner with his guys, staring at you.

Hae-Joo's eyes followed yours. "He won't bother you, I made him promi-"

"Since when has he kept a promise." You took another sip of your soda.

"Come on, everyone's waiting for you." Hae-joo dragged you to the kitchen, all your old friends were there, laughing and smiing and drinking.

San was the first to notice you. "Y/N" He put down his drink and hugged you tightly.

"Hey! Hey-" You squeaked as everyone else piled on you.

"Give the girl a break. You'll crush her." Yunho rolled his eyes and smiled, "Good to see you."

You and your friends caught up when you noticed him as he walked in with Jisung and Chan. You left your friends for a moment and started walking over to him. His dark eyes met yours through the crowd and your heart skipped a beat.

He walked over to you and laughed slightly as he looked you over, "First time I've seen you dressed in something other than business casual or pajamas."

You made a face, "I'm not always dressed business casual."

"You always look uptight." He motioned to the crop top. "It's a good look on you."

Your face got hot and he looked at someone talking to him for a moment. You left Minho there and went back to your friends, you huffed as you noticed they were no longer in the kitchen.

You picked up your soda and took a sip after you finished the can you noticed that your head felt a little foggy like you were drunk. You stumbled slightly, it was a fucking soda. Unless.. you cursed under your breath, why had you left it unattended.

You stumbled and almost fell over, someone caught you and you were about to apologize when you saw the tattoo on his wrist and pulled away.

"Y/n, are you alright?" Yeongsu reached for you and you shook your head. You needed to leave, you needed to find Minho.

You pushed past the sweaty, dancing bodies and found tipsy Hyunjin and Chan.

"Y/n?" Chan stood, completely alert suddenly, "You drank?"

You shook your head, "Where's Minho?"

"I haven't seen him, do you need to lea-"

You pulled away and ran looking around you went up the steps and looked around at the drunk students, then as you entered a room you saw them. Minho, Jisung, and several other people you didn't recognize, you're heart stopped as you took in the position Minho was in.

A girl sat on his lap, taking turns with him at a cigarette. You watched as the smoke clouded up as Minho exhaled. The girl giggled and was practically rubbing herself all over him. Your breath picked up and you felt tears clouding your vision.

Minho looked at the door and his eyes widened slightly at the sight of you. Your eyes met and you shook your head before you took off running.

Minho came out of the room looking around the party. Where had you run off to.. You weren't the type to drink. At least he didn't think you were. You looked scared.

"Y/N!" He pushed past some people in the party then he heard someone.

"Y/N JUST RAN OFF!" a guy groaned.

Minho turned slowly.

"YEONGSU!" Hyunjin...?

Minho stared at his friend who had another guy by the collar.

"What did you do?" Hyunjin said lowly.

"My friend put something in her drink nothing bad-"

Minho saw red. "WHAT!?"

Hyunjin released Yeongsu and backed up as Minho stalked towards them.

Yeongsu stared at Minho, "What? You want to fight me? I didn't think she'd run out like th-"

Minho punched him hard.

You lay in bed staring at your ceiling as your phone rang for what felt like the hundredth time, maybe it was, you weren't counting.

"Girl.." Doyeon whispered as she walked into your room with (fav flavor) ice cream. "What happened?"

"Maybe I'm stupid, Doyeon..." You muttered.

Doyeon looked at your phone as it rang again, Minho's contact flashing across the screen. "Did he-"

"Him and Yeongsu aren't that different." You rolled away from her.

"Y/n.." Doyeon hugged you, "You don't need a guy, you've got me and Jia and Yuna... Hell even your guy friends."

You stared blankly at the wall.

"Y'know what, we're going to cheer you up, right now." She dragged you into a sitting position and opened the tub of ice cream, "The student council president is the strongest most independent woman I know, and she is the last person to beat herself up over a boy."

You stared at your friend. "Y-Yeah."

"Come on." She held up two spoons, "We can watch that show you wanted to try."

You walked into the student council office the following Monday and sat in your chair. "Yuna, schedule."

"We have a general meeting today and that's it." She said.

"Uh huh."

Jia's computer dinged. "You have a student meeting today."

"Schedule it for after lunch." You said, you walked into history class and turned in your paper on the Roman empire, you felt a twist in your gut, Minho wrote this with you.

You went to your seat and pulled out your computer, as class began you took notice of how Minho wasn't late... he never came.

You pushed down the worry in your gut and dragged yourself to lunch then the student council office. On your way you saw Jisung in the hall, he looked at you for a moment before turning back to the person he spoke to. You got into your office and stared at your phone, the notifications from Minho had piled up,you scrolled through the message notifications of "I'm sorry", "Answer", and "We need to talk".

You put your phone down as the door opened and you stared at Yeongsu. He smirked as he closed the door, "Heard your little boyfriend had a bit of trouble." You noticed the black eye he had.

Trouble... what trouble could Minho be in? "He's not my boyfriend," You said. "What can I do for you, Yeongsu?"

"Come on Y/n. Let's think logically here, you like when I do that." He walked around the desk and behind your chair. "Minho is in the same boat I am, maybe he's got a little heart. Maybe he's tryna crawl out of the pit we're in. But the same way you went to that party after you said you were done with us, he's fucking around with other girls because it's in his mind. You can take the person away from their habit. But you can't take the habit away from a person, Y/n..."

You stared at your desk. "What do you know..." You muttered as you looked at your phone on the desk. A notification from Jisung came on the screen.

"Huh?" he turned your chair to face him. "Think about it Y/n, you came back, you haven't changed deep down and neither has he."

"What do you know?" You looked up at him speaking a bit louder.

"Y/n."

"I'm asking 'What do you know?' what do you know about change that I don't? For you to educate me?" You stood and glared at him. "I'm different, I'm uptight, I'm reserved, I don't trust anyone! But I trust him. I've seen him change, I know he's not perfect, he's tempted all the time, he makes mistakes! He's human. He's more human than you will ever be." You pointed a finger in Yeongsu's face and said lowly. "So don't tell me he'll never be better. Leave." You pointed to the door.

Yeongsu stared down at you. "You think he's that good for you huh.."

Your eyes narrowed.

He didn't say anything more and left the room. You stood there and shakily exhaled before grabbing your phone and looking at the messages from Jisung.

You ran as fast as you could to the front of the school and called a cab, when it arrived the guy looked at you in the rearview mirror. "Where to?"

"Beach please.." You said frantically.

"Lady the beach is like an hour from here-"

You threw a wad of twenties to the front of the car. "Is that enough?"

The guy opened his mouth then closed it before turning on the engine again and looking at you, "Buckle up."

You gave him another twenty, "Make it fast."

When you got to the parking you waved the driver off and looked around, you ran to the sand and searched. You ran a bit and stumbled looking around you moved to get your phone and called Minho. It went straight to voicemail and you screamed running further into the beach looking for him, anything, his car, his jacket, anything..

You fell and gasped as you noticed that your heels were digging into the back of your ankle. You sat down and stared at your phone, the last message from Minho was from the morning. You took off your shoes and winced. Remembering how Minho had given you those slippers and told you to wear more comfortable shoes.

Your eyes filled with tears as you called him again, it went straight to voicemail. You were about to throw your phone into the sand when you heard the soft sound of sound shifting beneath someone's feet.

"Didn't I tell you to wear comfier shoes.." Minho said softly, he kneeled in front of you, taking your feet gently in his hands.

You stared at him, tears starting to fall from you eyes, "I was rushing.."

He looked up at your face and smiled softly. "You crying prez?"

You wiped your face and punched him. "I WAS WORRIED!"

"I thought you didn't want to see me anymore, I messed up, you wer-"

You kissed him hard.

He blinked in shock for a moment as you pulled away.

"Don't scare me like that!" You punched his chest again.

"I'm sorry.." He whispered. "For everything."

You stared at him for a moment before hugging him tightly. "I hate you."

He smiled and hugged you back. "I love you, too.."

Minho picked you up on his back and carried you back to where he parked his car. He got you in and drove to a small convenience store, buying you bandages for your feet and some slippers. He sat you on a bench outside and carefully put the bandages on the blisters on your feet.

You watched him for a while. "Who was that girl..."

"Which girl?" He looked up for a moment.

"The one who was on your lap." You muttered.

He looked up at you. "Y/n," he looked apologetic. "I don't even know her..."

You smiled slightly, "So she isn't important?"

He smiled. "Were you jealous?"

"NO!" You looked away, cheeks burning.

"I like someone a lot more than a random hoe.." He put the slippers on your feet.

You spun to look at him. "Who?"

He rolled his eyes and stood, bending to be eye level with you. "You, Madam President." He kissed your forehead gently.

You stared at him.

"It's late, let's go back, hm?" he helped you to your feet and led you back to the car.

You finally checked your phone after it buzzed for what felt like the millionth time.

"Do you want to go back?" Minho looked at you, before looking back at the road, "We have class tomorrow."

"I already turned in the paper." You said, putting your phone down. "We can go back tomorrow.."

Minho looked at your hands on the console, "Yeah..." He reached over and took your hand in his, giving it a soft squeeze.

You walked into the student council office to see Jia and Yuna talking to Yeongsu.

He noticed your presence first and quickly got up. "Y/N!" He walked over to you, reaching for you.

You took a step back. "Explain." You looked at the girls.

"We thought he'd know where you were." Jia said.

"Where were y-" Yuna started.

"With me." Minho walked in and smiled at Yeongsu.

Yuna and Jia stared at you.

Yeongsu opened his mouth to say something but stopped as Minho put an arm around you.

"You are?" He stared at Yeongsu.

Yeongsu closed his mouth and walked out.

Seungmin looked at Yeongsu walking out as he walked in, took in the sight in front of him and rounded on his heel. "Good luck with that."

"I KNEW IT!" Yuna pointed at you two.

You rolled your eyes.

"Coffee?" Minho whispered in your ear, "You don't want to be late."

"Why so uptight?" You raised a brow at him.

He rolled his eyes and smiled as he dragged you out.

© 2024 xxkissesforchanniexx. DO NOT COPY OR TRANSLATE MY WORK

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 if your name is in blue i can't tag you very sorry

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[cherryrikis]

사랑으로 (with love,)

PAIRING swim instructors riki x fem reader

WARNINGS mild profanity

GENRE enemies to ??, fluff, angst if you squint

SYNOPSIS you hated riki because when it came to teaching your classes, he always one upped you. but riki doesn’t hate you. so when you both are punished for breaking equipment, he uses every opportunity to try and talk to you.

a/n loosely based of personal experience cz im a lifeguard🛟 also not proofread

it was meant to be a part time summer job. you just wanted something to do with all your free time, now that school was out.

but, the kids grew to love you, and you grew to love what you do.

so, you began to work full time at the local community pool.

instead of 2 classes a day, you’d teach 4 classes a day. it wasn’t too bad, each class only being 30 minutes.

you were so glad to help out, often even training the new interns.

until one. nishimura riki.

he was barely an intern for a week before becoming a full time employee. at first, you paid him no mind. he was a good teacher. very professional and good with the kids, often demonstrating the skills they needed to know to pass his class.

but eventually, he became better. he grew to become an even better teacher than you. the kids who loved you since the beginning started requesting to be put in riki’s class.

you watched him from across the pool, playfully splashing his students (who really, used to be your students), as they squealed about how the water was too cold.

but he always noticed your gaze. he turned around, smiling at you softly.

and you hated it, you felt nothing but hatred for him to the core of your heart. most of the staff noticed it, and it made it a bit awkward to work with either of you.

it was around 8:00 when your last class had ended. all your co-workers were putting the lane lines back in, preparing the pool for the swim team’s practice the following day.

“y/n? can you collect all the kick boards and put them away?” the manager, anton, asked you. “riki, go help y/n with all the other equipment.”

“what?” your mouth fell open, “anton, i can do it myself,”

“y/n.” anton cut you off. “don’t fight it. just let him help you.” he sighed before walking back into his office to pack up for the night.

you stood still in the middle of the walkway, ignoring how your coworkers moved past you to go wash up in the showers.

finally moving out the way to collect the boards, you huffed as you saw riki follow you into the storage room.

it was eerie. the lightbulb constantly went out, so the staff just figured to keep a candle and a lighter on the shelf above the bins.

riki lit the flame before going to help you clean up.

as you finished stacking the equipment, you went to walk out of the room, but riki grabbed your hand, pulling you back in.

“why do you hate me?”

“i don’t hate you.” you mumbled, before attempting to leave once more, only to be brought back to him.

he raised an eyebrow, looking you up and down.

“fine, i just don’t like you.” you scoffed. “you constantly one up me, taking my position, and even luring my students over to your class. nowadays, i don’t even get paid as much as you do anymore!”

“it’s not my fault! you act like my sole purpose was to come here and take your place.” riki grimaced at you. “maybe i am just the better instructor between us. it’s not my fault you can’t accept that.”

one might say it was out of jealous rage, or just an intolerance of immaturity. but something inside you snapped.

you shoved riki’s shoulder, causing him to fall against the wall and hit the shelf which held the candle.

from that point on, everything was in slow motion. the sound of glass breaking was loud and very audible.

the hot wax spilled across the plastic bin, melting the lid and spilling all over the foam boards which sat inside.

“what the fuck y/n?” riki yelled out.

immediately, anton came rushing in. he looked inside the bin, noticing how there was now a huge hole burnt through the container and all the boards inside. the equipment was no longer usable.

“are you serious? who’s fault was it? who did it?” he asked sturnly.

“it was y/n.” “riki did it.”

“are you kidding?!” you both exclaimed in unison.

“you knocked over the candle.” “you pushed me!” riki scoffed in disbelief. “it was foam! how do you manage to damage foam of all things?”

“enough!” anton intervened. he looked between you and riki, before moving his gaze to your red swim shirts. lifeguard, it read.

“your shirts are a symbol of your dedication and responsibility as a lifeguard and swim instructor. you may be good in the water, but you are both unbelievable outside it. if you keep this up, you could get those shirts revoked.”

“anton.. i’m so sorry.” you apologized, realizing what you done and that it technically was your fault.

“as much as i appreciate your apology, an apology won’t fix this mess. you two are on cleaning duty. i’ll call the janitor to tell him he doesn’t need to come tonight. the keys are on my desk, lock up before you leave.”

you nod in response, but riki still had something to say. “what? this is completely unfair! if anything, she should do it herself!”

but by then, anton had already left. “asshole.” he muttered. “this is all your fault y/n! by this rate we won’t finish for another hour or two.”

“by this rate, we won’t finish at all if you keep standing there and doing nothing. go grab that trash bag and mop.” you sighed.

riki was hesitant to help, but did so anyway, knowing it wasn’t up to him.

after power washing the concrete floors, scrubbing the bathrooms, and replacing all the damaged equipment, all the work was done by 10:05pm.

“good job, i guess. just wait for me then we can go.” you muttered as you finished wiping down the mirror of the employee’s bathroom.

“why would i wait for you?” he scoffed.

“you’re the one who got us in this mess.”

“i- whatever. just, let me help you.” riki licked his dry lips, taking the sponge from you.

the pool doors and the office were all locked up. you both were ready to leave before he paused right in front of the entrance.

“you wanna get something to eat? i’ll drive you home after. you shouldn’t walk by yourself and especially not on an empty stomach.”

“yeah. that’d be nice.” you replied, smiling genuinely at him for the first time.

with the both of you freshly showered yet so tired, riki drove to the nearest mcdonalds, ordering for the two of you.

after the food was picked up at the window, he pulled up at empty parking lot, turning off the engine so you could eat together.

“why are you still so nice to me after i was so rude to you?” you asked with a quiet voice, suddenly feeling bad as you reflected on your past interactions

“you know, it was never on purpose..” he whispered.

“what?” you asked, confused. his answer seemed slightly unrelated to your question.

“earlier, when we were still at the rec center. i asked why you hated me, and you said i basically replaced you.” riki reminded. “it wasn’t on purpose. i just really liked you back when you were only training me. and i thought, i don’t know.. maybe you thought it’d be attractive if you saw i was good with kids or something. but i never meant to make you feel that way.”

“oh riki..” you pouted, putting your box of chicken nuggets down. “i’m so sorry. i had no idea. i mean, if it makes you feel any better, i thought you were pretty cute when i was training you.”

“yeah, i guess that actually does help.” he smiled.

“can i..” you mumbled, leaning forward towards riki as he remained still in the drivers seat.

slowly, he moved closer to you, before eventually connecting your lips in a gentle kiss.

you moved your mouth against his, softly deepening the kiss.

riki smiled against you, and it was very noticeable. you found it cute how his face ran hot when you finally pulled away to repeatedly peck his cheek.

he brought a hand up to your face, holding you delicately. you leaned into his touch, before grimacing as you felt a slimy substance touch you.

“ew, riki!” you exclaimed, realizing his thumb had just accidentally wiped mustard under your eye.

he laughed, the sound like music to your ears, before he helped you wipe it off.

“i’m looking forward to working with you now that we don’t hate each other. maybe whenever we make eye contact mid class, you’ll stop looking at me weirdly.” you joked.

“oh come on, you know i only ever looked at you with love”. riki pursed his lips into a smirk, before bringing your lips back against his.

[spatialwave]

I can’t stop thinking about Angus with a childhood best friend!reader. (I imagine she would go to a different private school so they could only see each other over the summer and talk through letters and calls)

oh my god this is soooo good! you, my dear anon, have a beautiful mind. 🤍

𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐧𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝, 𝐧𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐰.

notes: angus tully x fem!reader || 3.1k words || dividers by @cafekitsune

you and angus had been best friends since kindergarten, inseparable through hundreds of playdates from the ages of five to fifteen. you two were attached to the hip and anyone could see the bond that blossomed between the two of you. he was everything to you and you were everything to him.

you remember the first day you met, early november and a chilly day on the playground. you were bundled up with a big coat and mittens while poking and prodding at some flowers that were slowly dying—signalling the freezing weather that would arrive at any moment.

"my mom told me those kinds of flowers are weeds." a voice spoke from beside you, a boy your age with wildly, curly hair and big brown eyes. he wasn't looking at you, but at the wilting flower.

"pretty weeds," you murmured as your gaze turned back to the same flower.

"yup," he replied, the two of you kneeling there in silence as the school bell rang. neither of you moved until one of the teachers found you both and ushered you inside—you sat next to each other for the rest of the year; the history of your friendship.

angus was there when you were twelve years old and experienced your first adolescent heartbreak. a boy one year older who had kissed you and told you he loved you; then kissed one of your other so-called friends the same day with the same words. back then it shattered your entire being and angus was there to help you pick up the pieces and put your poor little heart back together until it was beating again.

and whenever he was feeling sad, which happened a lot after his dad was put in a sanitarium, you were there at his house with some popcorn and ready to watch whatever movie would air that evening. sometimes you two would listen to a record and simply exist together—being near each other made him feel better.

hell, he was even there when you got your first period when you were visiting his family. you remember how both of you started screaming when you told him you were bleeding, crying as you convinced yourself you were dying until his mom came to the rescue. she had to explain biology more thoroughly than your health teacher did, which only embarrassed you and made angus start asking a flurry of questions about it. from then on, once a month, he'd be there with whatever you needed; junk food, chocolate, and a hot water bottle.

your lives were so intertwined that you knew every little detail about each other. well, mostly. there was one moment that you kept from him in the vastness of your relationship, how his first kiss made you boil with jealousy.

you pushed that feeling far away and focused on the positives of your friendship as years passed and life slowly felt more and more complicated.

it was in your freshman year of high school when he first started acting out, even when you offered all the support you could muster up. he was kicked out of your school at fifteen, then another in the same year. the following year he almost made it the entire schooling term before he was finally sent off to a private boarding school—completely uprooted from the friendship you two had together.

that was your first real heartbreak.

his too.

angus beat himself up about it during the sleepless nights at barton, devastated that he couldn't even see you on weekends like he used to. knowing that you were in your senior year and he was lagging behind as a junior because of his expulsions. there was a drift happening in your friendship and it was because of him. all because he couldn't keep his emotions in check.

you couldn't blame him and you wouldn't, you made that apparent with the letters you sent him. making sure he never once felt alone in his struggles.

"𝙷𝚒 𝙰𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜,

𝙸 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕. 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚂𝚌𝚘𝚝𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚊𝚜 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚍𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚞𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚕 𝚖𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢. 𝙳𝚒𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙿𝚎𝚕𝚘𝚙𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚊𝚗 𝚠𝚊𝚛 𝚢𝚎𝚝? 𝙸𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚒𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚊 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚠𝚘𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚗, 𝚒𝚝 𝚖𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙 𝚖𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚊 𝙲+. 𝙸 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚝, 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚂𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚝 𝙺𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚜 𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝙲𝚑𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚜 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚔, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚘𝚔𝚊𝚢?

𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝚈/𝙽."

it was these letters that kept him afloat during those days in the week that made him want to give up and run away, or worse, get expelled and sent to fork union. he kept every single letter from you and hid them underneath his mattress. if kountze were to see them that would be the end of it, so he made sure to read them only when everyone was asleep—he always had the best dreams after.

"𝙷𝚒, 𝚈/𝙽,

𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚎𝚝, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚍𝚒𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚜 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚂𝚌𝚘𝚝𝚝, 𝚜𝚘 𝙸 𝚊𝚖 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚏 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙. 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝙾𝙺, 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚜𝚎, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗. 𝙸 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚎𝚝 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚂𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚝 𝙺𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚜. 𝙼𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚖 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚕𝚎𝚢 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚠𝚎'𝚕𝚕 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚊 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚘 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗, 𝙸'𝚖 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜. 𝙸 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚘.

𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝙰𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜."

hearing from him always made your stomach flutter and left your heart aching deeply for him. it was melancholic, wishing more than he could be back by your side while trying to be content with a letter from your love... your love?

those feelings had been building up inside you for months—years.

it left you awake at night, wondering if angus felt the same or if you would remain nothing more than friends for the rest of your life. you couldn't be upset with the latter, angus was your best friend and you would never let yourself lose that.

yet, you yearned for him. for the possibility of something more. you dreamt of what it would be like to kiss him, but those thoughts diminished quickly because you felt guilty. you shouldn't have those feelings for a boy who's only your best friend.

a few weeks had passed and you hadn't written a letter back because school was hectic and the gloominess of winter had left you with little energy. you and angus could sometimes go weeks without hearing from each other, but it was never intentional. it wasn't until your first night home during the christmas holidays that you realized you'd never written him back. you had only started scribbling a letter when the phone rang.

"it's angus!" your mother called from the kitchen on the first floor. that's when you remembered the promise he made in your letters. he'd be visiting soon!

"coming!" you called back as you rushed down the stairs so fast your mother had chastised you for nearly running your little brother over. you pressed the phone against your ear, lips curved into a big smile as you caught your breath, "angus, when are yo—"

"i won't be visiting," his voice said quietly, a bit crackly through the phone and deeper than you remembered it being when you last spoke. your brows furrowed together at his words and you were filled with nothing short of confusion and disappointment, hand clutching tight the phone in your hand as your other absently fidgeted with the cord.

"what do you mean? you promised me you would, angus." you said to him, your voice sharper than you meant for it to sound, "is saint kitts really that much more important?"

silence.

"my mom and stanley are going without me," he replied and it was then you could hear in his voice that he was fighting back tears. his heart was broken and you weren't there to pick up the pieces. you filled with dread and guilt for your snappy words, feeling the aching of his heart in your own.

"what?" you questioned, leaning back against the wall and tilting your head up, eyes fixating on the ceiling where you could see a water spot forming from the old piping in your home.

"yeah, they decided now was the fucking time to take their honeymoon. can you believe that? they ditched me and went to saint kitts without me and left me at barton," he said, his voice growing angrier with each passing second, "the worst part is that i didn't care about saint kitts, i just needed to see you," his voice cracked again.

tears pricked at your eyes and your mom, who had been eavesdropping, had decided to let you have privacy in the kitchen as she escorted your brother to the playroom. you sniffled and wiped away the tears with the sleeve of your sweater, shaking your head in disbelief.

"i miss you so much, angus, it physically hurts," you whimpered into the phone and it was then you couldn't help but start crying. the sounds made his heart ache.

"i know, i'm so sorry."

the two of you were only on the phone for a few more minutes because angus had heard one of the other holdovers coming down the hall. you didn't question it, a school full of boys meant that crying around others was asking for a death wish.

when all you could was hear the dial tone, a quiet 'i love you' escaped your lips.

pathetic.

four days passed and tomorrow was christmas eve; you'd never felt so empty in your entire life. you hadn't heard from angus since your last phone call and it was like all joy and happiness had been sucked out of your soul. your mother, who often liked to call you dramatic, didn't dare say a peep.

you had been laying in bed all morning, doing nothing except falling back asleep or staring out your bedroom window and watching a soft flurry of snow falling. you promised yourself to write angus a letter today, but you weren't entirely sure that you would be able to without breaking down and sobbing. your eyes were already puffy from crying yourself to sleep, you couldn't risk them hurting anymore.

"sweetie?" the voice came with a knock on your door. your mother, her voice as sweet as cinnamon. you didn't answer as the door creaked open.

"i'd like for you to come for a drive with me, if that's alright."

"no."

"i'm not leaving until you come with me."

"fine."

you were bundled up in a big coat as you sat in the passenger seat of your mother's station wagon, your forehead pressed against the window as you watched the snowfall. you hadn't really been paying much attention to where you two were going or how long you'd been driving, figuring that sooner or later your mother would pipe up and ask about you. this was always her way of understanding your emotions, it always worked. you always managed to spill your guts to her while in the passenger seat.

"do you love him?" she asked quietly, her eyes flickering toward you.

"what?" you became defensive, sitting upright and glaring daggers at her, "no. i mean yeah. of course i love him he's my best friend. just... nothing more. nothing like that!"

"so you do." she smiled, admiring you as she focused her attention back ahead, fingers gently tapping against the steering wheel as she hummed softly, "i'm taking you to barton."

"what?!" you screeched, your heart pounding hard in your chest, "you're telling me that now? you should've let me get ready! god, he's going to think i'm a mess!" you grumbled as you pulled down the visor and looked into the mirror, trying desperately to make your hair behave and wipe away the tiredness from your eyes.

"he's not going to care what you look like, darling." your mother said with a sigh.

"okay, well i care what i look like!"

"stop being so dramatic."

—

on the way to barton, your mother told you what she had planned behind your back, she called the school and managed to speak with a lady named miss lamb and explained the situation. according to your mother she sounded very excited that you would be visiting angus—it was likely that he was being just as pouty and sad as you were, if not more.

it made you wonder how lonely he'd been. should you have called more?

your hands were shaking as you pulled up to the school, your entire body nearly vibrating as you stepped out of the car and did one more fix on your hair. you were excited to see him, but why were you nervous? you had never been nervous about seeing him, why was this different?

an older woman who you could only presume was miss lamb greeted you at the main entrance, ushering you in quickly. you sighed softly when the cold air was no longer nipping at your skin, but instead, you were filled with that familiar feeling of nervousness once again.

"i think angus is up in one of the classrooms right now. he's been hiding himself away since he's been here with just me and mr. hunham. the poor boy got left behind here while the other boys were able to go spend the holidays at a ski hill," she said, glancing at you a few times as you followed her, fidgeting with your hands nervously. you hadn't realized until now that your mother had stayed in the foyer. miss lamb spoke up again, disturbing your thoughts, "he mentioned you the other day at dinner. was complaining to us about his situation and how he was supposed to visit his best friend... you know, i expected you to be a boy."

"yeah," you murmur as you ascend a staircase, "people always say that. a girl and a boy could never be just friends."

"mhm, it's hard for people to think that when they know what young love looks like," she hummed, avoiding your piercing gaze as she led you through the halls, "angus!" she called out as you two reached a hallway on the second floor, "where are you?"

"what do you need, mary?" his voice echoed from the last classroom on the right, his voice whiny and pouty.

you hadn’t moved so fast in your life. your legs picked up speed and mary turned the other way, satisfied with what she'd seen so far. she wasn't going to impose on a special moment. this was the happiest she'd felt in a long time, too.

"angus!" you called out as you sprinted ahead, nearly missing the door as you made a full stop under the door frame. you watched him as he turned his gaze, eyes moving from the window he'd been peering out of and over at you. you were blessed with the sight of seeing his big brown eyes soften and how a weight eased on his shoulders. he was gorgeous, the most beautiful man in the world and you weren’t going to leave barton until he knew that.

"what the hell are you doing here?" he asked, blinking a few times, as though he was hallucinating and afraid you weren't real, "christ–get over here."

he met you halfway as you bolted toward him, arms outstretched and wrapping around his waist as you buried your face into his chest. “i missed you so fucking much,” you whimpered, fingers tightening into fists as they gripped the back of his jacket. he smelled nice, like the cheap cologne you bought him last christmas; musk, cedar & notes of vanilla.

his own arms were around your shoulders, his face nuzzling against the top of your head as you two relished in each other’s presence.

it had been months. months that felt like a millennium.

“i missed you too,” he whispered against your hair, arms tightening around you briefly before easing up, “you look so pretty.”

you tilted your head back to look at him, your eyes glossy from the tears that spilled down your cheeks. you had parted your lips to say something back as your cheeks reddened from his compliment, but he didn’t give you the chance—rightly shutting you up with his lips.

it was then you fully understood how much you loved angus tully, less as a friend and more as a partner. a soulmate.

your lips moved together in desperation and need, kissing each other like you were lovers that had been separated for years. one of his hands had moved up to the back of your hair, fingers tangling, while the other gripped at your hip. both of your arms snaked around he neck, pulling him down so you didn’t have to stand on the tips of your toes to meet his lips.

this lasted for awhile, stopping only when you two had ran out of breath and were panting together.

“i love you,” you said first, your forehead pressing against angus’ as you looked deep into his brown eyes, “i’ve loved you for a very long time... too long.”

“me too,” he murmured in returned, the hand that was on your hip now caressing your cheek, his thumb gently grazing over your soft skin, “you’re the only reason it’s lonely here. seriously, i think i’m going mad without you,” he laughed breathily, bumping his nose playfully against yours.

“then i’ll make sure you don’t have to go without me too long,” your voice was soft as you spoke, unable to rid yourself of the big smile that plastered your lips, “maybe we can convince your teacher to let me stay for a night… or maybe you can spend christmas with us.”

“i want to go to boston with you,” he said quick, like he’d been waiting to say it.

you knew exactly what he meant. you knew everything about boston—you knew who was waiting in boston.

“okay,” you murmured, “let’s go to boston.”

you couldn’t promise that it would actually happen, how on earth would a chaperone let their student travel miles away to a city without them? you didn’t care about that right now. all you cared about was making sure that angus knew he had your support. that’s how being best friends worked.

you were there for each other. you were always going to help pick up each other’s pieces.

“kiss me again, angus.”

[oggirlboss]

༺ ♰ ༻ sicko fantasies ༺ ♰ ༻

pairing[s]: yandere!janitor!levi ackerman x afab!student!reader

warning[s]: flirtatious behavior, power imbalance, m!masturbation, voyeurism, age gap, and hella weird so read at your own risk.

summary: levi ackerman has to supervise a certain brat in detention. needy little virgin hours ensue before school is in session.

note[s]: no beta, we die like carla.

word count: 3k

art belongs to columbo on twitter (i still refuse to call it x)

levi ackerman is a sick, twisted, little fuck of a man. the exact kind of gross dude that forced schoolgirls to have a dress code. he couldn't stop himself from looking up girls skirts when he knelt down to pick up their trash, or avoid looking down girls shirts when they leaned over to wash their hands in the sink. he didn't even regard his perversion as an awful thing. after all, there are other guys out there who let their obsessions go to the absolute extreme, their crimes delving into horrendous depths like rape and murder. levi could never imagine such things happening, the thought made him sick to his stomach. he wasn't that bad... was he?

 principle erwin certainly didn't think so. he's known about levi's little habit since grade school, but that didn't stop him from writing levi a letter of recommendation and convincing the board of regents to hire him as the primary janitor at shiganshina high school. surely if erwin thought he was so bad he would have tried to protect the girls of the school from him, right?

¿ʇɥɓıɹ

it wasn't like all of his attention was centered on one individual, levi knew that type of behavior was out of the question. he was just liked looking that was all, he didn't have the skills to actually approach one of these girls. despite these perversions, he was disgusted by men that touched girls. the ones who prey on the vulnerable, whose sickly minds allow them to prey on girls and use their positions of power and authority to manipulate these girls into doing whatever they want. to use them however they want. levi didn't think he was like that at all.

but he did take a great interest in you during your sophomore year. you probably got put into detention for a stupid reason, and he couldn't help but sympathize with you. he figured that you got caught doing something mildly dangerous by an administrator and shoved into detention with the rest of the rejects. except since it was nearing the end of the year, all the other teachers didn't even bother to put their students in detention. they dished out more tame punishments to their students and basically took it easy for the last stretch of work until summer break. the teachers were just as fed up with their jobs as the students were with their mundane classes. you, unfortunately, were the unwritten exception to this unspoken rule, and as a result you were the only one sitting in a desolate cafeteria.

that was the first time levi truly paid attention to you. you were a shy kid, you mostly kept your head down and didn't talk much. he had seen you around before and he figured that it'd be creepy if he struck up a conversation before going off to clean the bathrooms in the teacher's lounge. as soon as he saw your silk-smooth skin peeking out of your too short shorts, he knew he'd need to find an excuse to spend more time with you.

"oi! brat." he spoke calmly, feigning disinterest when his heart was beating out of his chest. "i'm your assigned supervisor for detention. you can start by picking up a rag and some disinfectant to wipe down all the tables and chairs." his stomach lurched at the lie, this was exhilarating. he watched you hurry to do as he commanded, feeling pride swell in his chest. you believed him. he was a trusted adult, and his authority in the matter didn't need any questioning.

"i was told professor miche would be in charge of detention today." levi pondered on a good response, but he couldn't stop mulling over the fact that bastard had snatched you up first. miche would have had you all to himself if levi hadn't spoken up just now

"miche couldn't make it on time, so i'm here to cover for him." levi had a teasing tone in his voice, a smile ghosting his fine features for less than a second. "now are you going to stand around looking pretty, or are you going to get to work?" his taunt didn't have much of an effect on you as you marched up to his supply cart and snatched up a rag and some random chemical mix. "no no no. that won't do." levi sauntered towards you, snapping the rim of his plastic gloves as he did so. "you can't use furniture polish for cleaning surfaces. while the lemony scent does have it's perks, a bleach based product would help you much more." your eyebrows furrowed as you nodded. maybe you could learn something from his guidance, after all, he was a professional.

"alright. will clorox work?" you picked up the product by its handle and squeaked as you gripped the hilt, causing a foamy string of liquid to burst from its container.

"hey, hey, no funny business." levi smirked at your playful tenacity. you were so much more fun than he'd thought you would be. "who even taught you how to clean?" he scoffed in a light-hearted manner.

"i guess i'm self taught, but i always get the job done good enough." you smiled at him as you sprayed the different tables and wiped them down with an old blue rag.

"well maybe your good enough isn't good enough for me and my standards." levi hovered over your shoulder, carefully observing your movements. he wrapped himself around you, pressing his chest against your back and helping you grasp your hand around the rag. "move your arm in a circular motion, but don't press too hard into the wood, you'll tire yourself out too quickly that way." you carefully listened to every word he said, this is a learning experience, isn't it? this knowledge came straight from the mouth of a professional, you'd be absolutely daft to not pay attention to him. but it didn't help that he was easy on the eyes or that you could feel his muscles flex through your clothing. he was undeniably attractive and it was hard for you not to entertain the notion. his sharp breath ghosted the skin behind your ear.

"what sort of cleaning products do you use at home?" his question and his proximity startled you.

"um, i use the mr. clean stuff. my mom thought that their super bowl commercial from a few years ago was the epitome of comedy ."

"tch." you could feel his grip tighten on your hand as he shook his head. you frowned at his reaction.

"well what's that supposed to mean?" he sighed before spiraling into a lecture.

"mr. clean, although sexy in his own right, is much too expensive. especially those magic erasers of his. they are outrageously overpriced, and they're not even real magic." your nose crinkled as you snickered at his joke, and his face lit up in a blush. "they're uh, they're made of uh sodium bisulfite copolymer, and it's ridiculously cheap. for half the price, you can buy ten times the amount that damned company scams you with."

"i suppose that's one of the many miracles of capitalism." levi's deep chuckle vibrated through your back. his presence was comforting, and it was beyond a relief to have such a friendly person around, even if it will only last the span of detention.

"you're funny." he leaned into the crook of your neck and lightly sniffed the perfume you'd applied earlier that morning. it's probably for that bastard, miche. levi did his best to shake that thought out of his head, and hurriedly stepped away from you.

"is everything alright, sir?" you threw your rag down, abandoning your place at the table and rushed to his side. your hand rested on the bare skin of his arm, and your eyes widened seeing levi acting so odd. he was perfectly fine seconds ago, it was hard to understand how this change could have taken place so quickly. "you look very pale." before he could blink the backs of your fingers were pressed against his clammy forehead and he was in heaven. he basked in the attention you were giving him, and in this shaken state narrowly avoided lathering you with the same touching care.

"yes, yes." levi cradled his head in his hand, and stared up at you with his hair falling into his eyes. "it's just a little headache, it's no problem." he frequently struggled with migraines, but those were nothing compared to whatever was coming over him now.

"well, i have some extra tylenol in my purse, i can go back to my locker and get some." you couldn't register the speed with which he reached out and held your wrist in an iron grip.

"no." his voice was gravelly, like a frog was caught in his throat. "don't leave. it's really nothing." he smiled to comfort you but it only did the opposite. there was a glint in his eyes that made you want to run away and never come back. you reluctantly agreed to stay with him, and worked through the rest of your detention in relative silence.

the following morning you were called into professor miche's office over the intercom. there were oohs and aahs from your classmates and a resounding thunder of commentary.

"i don't think y/n has ever gotten in trouble before." armin spoke to himself.

"she isn't going to be able to worm her way out of his one." snickered to her friends.

"how much you wanna bet she's screwing him to get a better grade?" reiner joked as berholdt berated him for making assumptions. wrong. wrong. wrong.

ɬɧɛყ'۷ɛ ɠơɬ ıɬ ąƖƖ ῳཞơŋɠ, ʝųʂɬ Ɩıƙɛ ɬɧɛყ ąƖῳąყʂ ɖơ.

you slammed your fists on the table, effectively silencing the chatter. you didn't bother to push your chair back in as you raced down the hallway to pound on miche's office door. you heard a sigh from inside as he beckoned you inside. his menacing figure towered over you

"it's not polite for you to skip out on detention, l/n. where were you for our session?"

"well, you would know if you weren't tardy for detention, sir." you smiled in an effort to brush off the discomforting feeling his stare brought you. miche leaned down to your level and violently sniffed the air around you. "i was with the janitor, you told him to fill in for you. does that ring a bell?" you could care less if you were sounding rude, but his questioning was getting tedious.

professor miche sneered down at you, mulling over the consequences that would be brought down upon you if he discovered this was a lie. "is this true, levi?" your eyes widened as turned around to see levi leaning on the handle of his cart. the hallway was utterly devoid of people, and you didn't understand how you didn't hear his footsteps or the squeak of the wheels on his cart. it's like he was invisible the entire time, appearing silently like a ghost. levi cleared his throat as he stared back at miche.

"quite so, yes. she worked very well under my guidance." he let his gaze drop to the ground as he licked his lips. "it makes me wish that miss l/n could get detention more often so i could have some help keeping this place tidy." he absentmindedly swiped two fingers over miche's name card that hung on his office door. "she worked well, and i'm sure she'll learn from the experience." miche scowled at levi, something was off about him. while the two of them weren't particularly close, he could certainly tell if something was wrong. he'll have to report this to principle erwin, if only to ease his conscience. "well, if that's everything, i suppose i'll be on my way." you gave levi a little smile and mouthed a quick thank you before he set off down the hallway with his cart.

the rumbling of the wheels echoed through the empty hallway as he moved closer and closer to the bathrooms he'd set out to clean. his cart was placed to the right of the entrance to the boy's bathroom and upon entering he was greeted with the welcoming scent of orange spice. levi took great care to make sure he was alone in that bathroom before he retreated into the furthest stall. he undid the buttons of his pants and slid them down his milky thighs until they rested around his ankles. he ran a swift hand through his silky black hair as he gripped the base of his cock tightly, gently smoothing over the thick skin and working to calm his unsteady breathing. he's never been this wound up during his work hours, but he had a feeling that this was soon going to be a normal occurrence. his brain began to wander away from the bathroom stall as he thought back to the porn he'd watched in his car before he came into work. he imagined the movements of the female model's body beneath the man, and how her body shook with every impact of their hips. his manhood twitched in excitement as he thought of her y/h/c hair that laid spread across her red pillows, but that was too perfect. it wasn't dirty enough for him. he needed the real deal, but nobody wanted to touch an old man, and they certainly didn't want to touch someone as creepy as levi ackerman. so he had to resort to doing it himself.

his hand stilled, cock sitting at attention against his pale stomach. he ran a finger over the mushroom-like head and began to roughly fist his cock like a madman. his eyes clenched shut as he tried to think of something that would get him off. the first thought that came to his mind wasn't even erotic, but it gave him a renewed vigor and sent a primal ache coursing through his aching cock. he wondered how you would look sleeping. you have to be the most heavenly creation in existence, vulnerable and at peace while you dream. it would only be too easy to get into the file cabinets that contain thee student records and discover your place of residence, and finally be blessed by the sight of you snuggled into your bed with your stuffed animals cradled to your chest. he could shimmy your cute pajama shorts off your body and press his hot tongue against your cunt. it'd be slimy and wet and lewd and absolutely gross. and he'd love every goddamn minute of it. your face would be flushed red and sweat would bead your forehead as you unconsciously rut against his mouth. he wants your juices to lather his lips and hold your breasts in a death grip as he makes you squirt onto his waiting tongue. he wants to be 𝖘𝖔 𝖌𝖔𝖔𝖉 to you, and spoil you in every way imaginable. he wants to spear you on his cock and bury his head in your breasts, smothering himself and coating the valley between the two mounds on your chest with a mixture of his heavy drool and your wet release. he'll pump you full of his cum until you're absolutely bursting and pull up your panties to hide his mess. he'll sneak out your window and drive home while you lay in warm in your bed with your face shoved into your pillow.

he lets out a heavy groan as he brings his hand to his mouth to bite on his knuckles to stop any sound from escaping his treacherous mouth. he began to imagine what you would look like if you gave him a handjob. would you be slow and tentative? or would you opt to beat his manhood dry? no doubt your delicate fingertips would feel like heaven on earth, and your soft breath would hit his cheek as you focused on bringing him immense pleasure. he heard the door to the bathroom open, but he couldn't break free from his lusty haze. his mind was too focused on the constant phap phap phap of his hand beating against his manhood to register the footsteps that slowly neared the stall he occupied. a hand pressed against the unlocked door to fully expose levi's perversions to the open air. he looks up to see erwin staring down at him, a disappointed look coating the principle's face. no words were spoken as levi continued his assault on his cock. a broken cry left his lips as he threw his head back, eyes clamped shut as he felt his creamy cum shoot out onto his shirt and hand.

"really, levi?" his eyebrows furrowed as levi looked him dead in the eye. "the boy's bathroom?" levi groaned at his question, not bothering to answer before bending over and pulling up his pants. levi had no shame, and certainly not in front of erwin.

levi laughed as he wiped the cum off his hand with toilet paper. "would you prefer i did it in the girl's?" his bland retort left a dumbfounded erwin unable to move from where he stood. levi used that moment of shock to escape from the stall and out into the hallway. he was going to enjoy this newfound sense of freedom.

[leeofthevoid]

Cold-Blooded Beings- Part 1

Farleigh Start x Reader

a/n: Hey guys this is a multi-chapter thing, a little series I suppose and I'm excited to map it out. Hello! Had a few comments that wanted it changed to Y/N and I got you! Please let me know if I missed a few but I tend to not use the assigned name I did before. Just tell me if you guys also want some name specific Fic for you so I can make one shots! Big thanks to the people who pointed good stuff out!

Warnings: Mentions of Alcohol, Strong language

Word Count: 1777

|| Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five

Money Makes The World Go Wild

Oxford was a dream come true. It was so difficult to actually get into the school without the help of your family’s wealth and earn your place, it was rewarding to finally get into it. 

It wasn’t until dinner time when you felt big arms wrap itself around your shoulders while you ate. “Look who we have here. N/N L/N.” What the hell? This voice was unrecognizable. What does this guy want with you? “I’m sorry um…Did I do something wrong?” The man looked confused and chuckled. “Y/N , it’s me Felix? Felix Catton? Cry Baby Fee?” 

You jolted back in surprise and your face turned from a slight scowl to surprise. You didn’t hesitate to jump and wrap your arms around him. “Fee! Holy shit you’re so big now! I barely recognized you!” You both laugh heartily as you pour out your happiness in the embrace. “How I miss you, I miss you so.” You pulled back to pepper his face with kisses and finally sat back down on your seat, huge smiles still plastered on your faces. “You’re so big now Fee! I can’t believe you’re the same little boy I had to carry when you scraped your knees.” Felix cringed slightly at the story but still smiled his heart out. “Well yeah, I’m not the little boy Catton you used to know. It’s so nice to see you N/N. Venetia would be so happy know you go here.” You pause and look around the dining hall looking around for the other Catton sibling. “Speaking of, where is she?” Felix leaned on the table and sighed, “Went to Cambridge in fear that I would ‘ruin’ her university experience.” It was so like Venetia to say that and you admired how they seemed to barely change. 

You ended up talking through dinner time about how you got into Oxford the way your family always went in. Felix teasing you about your strict family. How you both grew through the years and realized how you missed each other’s presence ever since your father threw you to Switzerland to attend boarding school after your last summer in Saltburn. You both exchanged numbers and a promise to Felix that you will for sure hangout with him and his friends. With a goodbye embrace that was too long for other people, you parted ways. 

It was hard being a Teacher’s assistant. When you settled after a few months into your summer term, your professor offered for you to help him tutor his students which you gladly agreed to for extra credit. You were now stuck in the room with Mr. Ware, this shy scholar kid named Oliver Quick, and another empty seat that the other student seemed to miss every session. It’s their fifth absence now. Oliver was in the middle of reading his essay out loud when you decided to take a quick bathroom break, waking up your professor in the process to at least pay attention to the poor guy. After a few minutes out, you’re met with a new person chatting with the tutor and Oliver sits back quietly. You got a better view of the new presence and saw a nice head of curly hair, fashionable clothes, and…No way. “Farleigh?” 

Oliver and Farleigh look up at you from the door and his eyes widen. “ Oh my god N/N!” He stood up and scooped you in a tight hug. Man, these Cattons sure love their hugs. “I thought Felix was fooling us when he mentioned a special childhood friend in Oxford.” He gently puts you down and backs away to sit next to Oliver again. 

“My, my. A L/N and a Catton? Oliver, you have quite the company.” Your Professor stated. You saw Oliver slowly back up in his chair more, feeling a tinge of pity for the guy. “Let’s start over, Sir. I believe we all have limited time.” You chime in. You all sat down and proceeded to listen to the essays Oliver was abruptly cut off. His work was too robotic and a little…Boring? You can’t help but try to wake the other two people up from time to time to at least alleviate the embarrassment Oliver had. When Oliver finally finished, you cleared your throat, signaling for Farleigh and Mr. Ware to at least look alive. Mr. Ware shared his thoughts and you did too, “I believe there was a lack of something in it, Oliver. I’m sure you’ll be able to revise it better so don’t worry too much.” Farleigh snorted at your kindness and blatantly told him the truth. It was a tensioned back and forth that you’d much rather not be apart of but what can you do? Farleigh was right but so was Oliver, you looked at Mr. Ware and he simply shook his head. “So! We had quite the session today, lads. Oliver, please take note of the changes Ms. L/N will send you, and Farleigh please write your essay too. Um…Send anonymous regards to your mum too please?” Farleigh winks at him and gives you a kiss on the cheek before he leaves the room. Oliver soon made a beeline out of the room and you followed after getting a few tasks from Mr. Ware.

After a few days, you came across Oliver walking alone through the courtyard. “Hey, Oliver!” He quickly looked around for the source and saw you waving at him. “Oliver! Fancy meeting you around and not in the office.” You smiled at him as you put out your hands out to shake. He took it and gave you a shy smile, “Ollie is alright. Y/N right?” You nodded. “So sorry about Farleigh, he always had a sharp tongue ever since we were kids, can I buy you a few drinks to apologize?” 

“No, no, c’mon now Y/N it’s not your fault. Why are you doing this?”

“Because I want to. I don’t need a reason to treat a friend out?” You smiled at him as he fiddled with his jacket deep in thought. “I suppose you it wouldn’t be bad…” You smiled again “See you later at the pub then. You know where right? Bring your friends Ollie!” Oliver hurriedly walked away with a small bounce of excitement as you slowly backed away bumping into something…Or someone. “Running a charity case, love?” Farleigh chuckled. You look up at him and roll your eyes with a slight smile. “Don’t be mean Far, I just thought he was a decent person to befriend.” 

“And where is Farleigh’s invite then?” He wrapped his arm around your shoulder as you both walked. “Since when did you grow so mean? I remember you jumping up and down whenever I complimented you more than Felix.” Farleigh groaned at the memory as you laughed. “You know, being the oldest out of all of us had its perks, such as carrying both you and Fee when you were both so tiny! I felt so big next to you! Now look at you towering over me.”

“N/N, you sound like an old lady reminiscing about her children’s lives, I don’t miss that at all. If you’re coming to the pub with that bore of a person, come by at our table yeah? I’d hate for you to be lonely.” You chuckled as he kissed your cheek to walk off into who knows what. 

The pub had a really good atmosphere for a place swarmed with people in their early twenties dying to have some semblance of relief from school. You would even argue that The King of Arms was a decent place to have a date, even dressed nicely to appease the people you’ll hangout with. One problem is that you never anticipated the fact that Oliver could probably have no friends. Well, he had one, Michael, but the thing about Michael is he seemed to be so absorbed in his genius that he never did care to let you or Oliver talk. As much as you appreciate the boys not ogling at you with the usual stares you get from wearing provocative clothing, it was kind of pathetic that they didn’t at least compliment you perhaps? 

You excused yourself to get another round of drinks, on you of course. It kind of put you in a bit of a damper mood when Michael didn’t even acknowledge it, at least Oliver did but it still sucked. You approached the Barkeeper to bring you three pints of Pale Ale which he kindly nodded to. “What’s a pretty lady like you doing with losers like them?” You chuckled and looked up at the figure slowly sliding their hand on your waist. “Farleigh.” You lightly warned with a smile, “Cut them some slack. It’s probably their first time going out with people. I was like that when I started my summer term.” Farleigh simply rolled his eyes at your kindness thinking it was stupid. You notice how he seemed to still tower over you and that was something since you weren’t exactly short, five foot ten to be exact. You even had heels on for goodness sake! When did this small tiny boy grow so tall? 

You snap out of your trance when the door dings. You turned and saw Michael’s retreating figure, turned and checked the table you were occupying and found no signs of Oliver. Great, you just got ditched. “So…About my offer?” Farleigh’s tone was teasing and you can’t help but give in. With a sigh and a defeated huff you give in. “Fine Far, you win. What about the stuff I ordered?” 

He scoffs, “Thank you for buying me some, you’re a doll.” Farleigh says in a sarcastic manner, picks up the tray and brings it to the table while dragging you with him. You notice Oliver’s shy figure sitting beside Felix as Farleigh pulls a chair out for you. Paying no mind to the boy who just walked out of your table, you greeted everyone with a cheery expression even earning some wolf whistles from the guys sitting with you. “Y/N will apparently buy two rounds of drinks for us.” Farleigh teases. Everyone cheered making you roll your eyes at him. At least you get to use that allowance your dad finally said you earned.

After some time on the table, it still pissed you off that Oliver ditched you, he even avoided eye contact with you while talking to Felix. It’s alright, everything will be okay and you should just let this instance slide, you say to yourself. It was just an apology drink from Farleigh’s mean outburst and the subject of the event was right next to you making out with a girl on his other side. Don’t you just love university?

Next

[coupsie-daisies]

Power Over Me - Part 1 | Jeong Yunho & Kim Hongjoong

Pairing(s): Werewolf!Jeong Yunho x Witch!OC x Werewolf!Kim Hongjoong, Kim Hongjoong x Park Seonghwa, Jeong Yunho x Song Mingi

Genre: Smut (18+ ONLY), Urban Fantasy, College AU, Enemies to Lovers, Childhood Sweethearts, Hurt/Comfort

Summary: The sheer existence of Yunho's best friend, the person he imprinted on nearly a decade prior, near his pack sets Hongjoong on edge, and things go to absolute shit when everyone finds out why. Yet another thing that Blue has to fix, just like they always do.

Word Count: 25k

Warnings: Cussing, everyone in the pack is poly, unprotected sex, choking (technically nonsexual), excessive talk of scents, mentions of Knotting, mild infidelity, Yunho has a tragic backstory, angst (especially at the end of this chapter), voyeurism, I know I missed something so please let me know!!

Power Over Me Playlist

Power Over Me Pinterest Board

A/N: This is my piece for the Clownracha summer 2024 fic exchange. It's written for my beloved @ferrethyun, I hope you love it babe!

Tags: @dragonofthenorth0726 // @wooyussy // @burningupp-replies // @bunnypig18 // @brownieracha // @decaffedthoughts

Masterlist This fanfiction is property of @/coupsie-daisies, reposting on any platform is prohibited

Magic was, in its best state, a finicky thing. It relies entirely on a competent user to carry out its task, needing to be guided and shaped lest it break free and wreak havoc. Under a skilled, watchful eye, however, magic was a cure for just about anything. Magic is as old as the universe itself, and as time passes, the training of magic users and beings infused with its essence became essential to the growth of the world.

Those with the ability to manipulate magic were abundant in the world. It became common for them to rise to power or notability in many roles. Witches were in high demand as medics, teachers, mentors for those who knew less about the way the world worked. The water spirits and those that lived in the water worlds were vital to the growth of trade and travel. The Fae were consulted for matters beyond what the eye could see, and creatures of the night were revered for their power. As time went on, as the world grew and magic flourished along with it, the two became very intricately intertwined. So, naturally, the University of United Magic grew too.

The University started small, a coven of witches cooped up in a house where their elders taught others the trade, the tricks, and the sacred secrets of the past. Eventually, though, the University matured into a whole sprawling campus akin to any large college. All sorts of magic were taught within the looming buildings, and the lush nature that surrounded everything was healthier than anything touched by man's bare hands before.

Among the growing student body was one of the brightest witches on the continent, the child of two of the oldest, largest bloodlines in the history of magic. Of course, they had no intention of letting that go to their head. The rest of the student body, however, seemed to keep it fresh in their mind. People were never surprised when they came out top of their class yet again, or when they won another certificate or award of excellence. They simply understood magic in a way that other people couldn't begin to comprehend, forming it into something never before seen and harnessing it with the same level of care taken when handling a wild animal. It came more naturally to them than anything else.

Which, perhaps, was why they so rarely left their room beside for their classes, too busy experimenting with their newest brews or enchantment combinations. They were always seeking ways to grow their practice, if for no reason other than fucking around and finding out. Still, to say that they had privacy was a bit of a stretch. Not only were people regularly seeking their assistance with issues that basic magic couldn't begin to touch, but more often than not there was one particular werewolf stretched out on their bed, watching them work with a quiet, satisfied adoration.

"Must you stare at me when I'm working?" Blue deadpanned, looking over their shoulder for a moment before turning back to the swirling, shimmering liquid trapped in the beaker on their desk.

"I'm not staring! I'm just...watching. Like a normal person." Yunho answered casually. He sat up, long legs folding on the bed. He was, in fact, staring. But it was hard to blame him what with the way that he enjoyed magic. As a turned werewolf with no magical heritage, there wasn't much magic that he could practice himself. He had really only applied to the University to learn to brew his own remedies for his condition -- his rut suppressants and potions for the pain and whatnot. Not to mention that a degree in Magical Literature could come in handy in the future. But, most of all, Blue had applied to the University, and if there was one thing that had never changed about Jeong Yunho it was his dedication to following Blue around like a lost puppy. He'd been doing it since they were just little kids.

"Right, definitely normal. Can you pass me that bottle there? The lavender concentrate?" And like the obedient dog that he was, Yunho jumped up to pass the dropper bottle over to them. He stayed there, watching as they carefully dripped three perfect beads of the liquid into the mixture. It hissed, and bubbled, and turned a vicious shade of red before settling. It let off a subtle aroma of wood smoke and something sort of sweet. Blue seemed satisfied with this, wafting the steam towards them before carefully pouring it into a bottle and stoppering it. 

"What's that one for?" Yunho asked, picking up the bottle and turning it back and forth in his hands. Blue grabbed one of the sticker labels that was laying on their desk and scrawled a name onto it.

"It's a fuel substitute for fire demons. For Juyeon from our History of Enchantments class last semester. He's been having trouble with his current fuel, so this should help him until he can get it sorted out." They got up, taking the bottle from Yunho, labeling it, and tucking it into their bag.

They were always doing things like this, working tirelessly to help others in new and creative ways and expecting nothing in return. Yunho admired that. They said it was their duty to the world, to do what they could for those who couldn't. They'd been studying magic since they were little, learning under their grandmother and picking up tricks from covens all over the world. Blue's grandmother was one of the most powerful witches in the entire country, and most importantly, she was a wonderful woman. Yunho remembered that very well from their childhood, from the day he'd met her and Blue so many years prior.

The day Yunho met Blue was a blur in his mind. He'd lost a lot of blood, and the therapists said that trauma could make his memories disjointed on top of it. But he remembered the fresh linens hanging outside, the way that the breeze carried the scent, and how it was so strong in that moment.

He wasn't sure how the old woman had found him, or how she'd been strong enough to get him back to her cottage all by herself. He didn't remember how long the walk had been from the forest to the front door, but surely it had been a lot of work. But he did remember how she'd laid him carefully on a blanket on the workbench, the way that the pain had seared through him, and how he'd cried. It wasn't the violent, heavy sort of crying - he didn't have the energy for that - but it had felt like it to him. Every heaved breath ripped through his body like the claws that had put him in this state in the first place.

Grandmother recognized his condition easily as she worked her magic to heal him, stitching his wounds back together with her gentle chanting. This room, Yunho remembered, looked very much like what he'd imagined a witch's home to look like. There were dried herbs hanging from the ceiling, and sigils painted on the door frame, and the shelves and cupboards that lined the walls were full of jars and bottles of things he didn't know about, all labeled and neatly organized.

And then there was Blue. They were so small and unassuming as they stood against the wall, far enough out of the way that their grandmother could work but not so far that they couldn't examine what was being done to him. Yunho remembered their eyes; wide, and curious, but so very calm in the face of all the blood and pain.

Grandmother hurried around the room, speaking as she gathered her ingredients -- maybe to herself, or maybe to her grandchild who was certainly listening intently. She measured everything carefully into a bowl, beginning to grind everything together and chanting something over it, a language Yunho didn't recognize. He was cold, but it was so late in the summer, and that would have worried him if he wasn't so preoccupied by how sleepy he was getting. His eyes were growing heavier by the second, and every breath was beginning to feel like an uphill battle. Was he shivering? His mom had his jacket in case the night got cold on the way home, he wondered why she didn't put it on him before he left. Or maybe she'd just brought it with her...wherever she was now.

"Stay with us, now. Just a little longer." Grandmother soothed, her voice gentle and worn like the leather bracelets that Yunho admired when he went into town. He liked those, and he liked her voice too. "Bluebell, now."

Bluebell. The word repeated in his mind as he watched the child across the room jump into action. It sounded so pretty the way it rang in his ears.

"Bluebell," He repeated, he wasn't sure why, and it was so quiet that he could barely hear it. Then they looked at him with those eyes again. Maybe that was their name, it would be very well suited to them, he decided, so pretty. They were very pretty too. But not like flowers, he thought, like the rocks along the edge of the stream. Different, not so delicate and fragile as the flowers, special, something that he wanted to hold onto.

They passed something to their grandmother, a small jar of ground ingredients that she sprinkled into the discolored mush in her bowl. Then she mixed some more, asking for more jars and adding them to her odd mixture before moving closer to him.

"This might hurt," Bluebell said quietly. "You can hold my hand if you want to."

They offered their little hand to them, and Yunho took it in his. They must have been near the same age, but he was already big for his age. His parents said he'd be taller than his dad if he kept growing like this. He thought he'd like that a lot, being tall was very important to him at eight years old. He reached for their hand, holding it in his weakly on the table.

Blue watched on, caring eyes scanning his face for discomfort when Grandmother began applying the poultice to his wounds. He was weak, and tired, but even so he hissed at the burn and tried to squirm himself away, but he couldn't make it very far in his condition anyway. Grandmother shushed him, but not in the mean way that most adults shushed him, it sounded more like a comfort.

"Will he be okay?" Blue asked. Yunho's eyes were squeezed shut, and he gripped their hand a little tighter when they tried to pull it away. They didn't try to move again afterwards.

"He'll be alright. I'll wrap his wounds up and we'll let him rest for a while. I imagine he must be very tired now." Grandmother said. Yunho heard her begin to move around, cleaning up the messes she'd made. A hand stroked his hair, now damp with sweat and maybe a little bit of blood. "We'll get him cleaned up and fed when he wakes up. But for now, I think we best leave him alone."

"I don't want to leave him alone. Can I stay until it's time to eat?" Blue asked. It wouldn't really matter anymore, Yunho was already fast asleep on the bench, his hand relaxing in theirs. But their grandmother nodded anyway, a smile on her face. She was sure that Yunho would recover just fine with Bluebell at his side.

"You're, like, a really good person," Yunho said, settling back onto his friend's bed. Blue rolled their eyes. This was something that Yunho felt the need to tell them often. And, sure, it was nice being praised, but Blue didn't do this sort of thing for the praise or the gratitude. If anything, they did it because they felt obligated to. See, very few witches understood the intricacies of magic the way that they could. That meant that it was their responsibility to help how they could, to teach what they discovered, the things that they learned. Which was also part of why they always had tutoring slots open -- not that they really wanted to be teaching people who were most interested in cheating off their work. But Blue did it all, most importantly in their opinion, because they loved magic.

"Can you stop with that?" They said, pulling out a notebook that they'd filled with their goals for the week and scratching off a bullet point. "You praise me too much."

Yunho shrugged.

"I'm serious, though! You know that. I know a lot of people who wouldn't try half as hard as you do even if they were getting something out of it."

Blue was about to argue back when a knock sounded at their door. It was a sound that they sometimes dreaded, but this time they were relieved to have someone intervene and cut Yunho's rants short. They jumped up from their chair, stepping over Yunho's bookbag on the floor and opening the bedroom door.

"Hyung," Yunho said, surprise evident in his voice as he perked up from the other side of the room.

"What brings you here?" Blue asked, stepping aside to let the older man inside. Seonghwa looked breathtaking as he always did, maybe a side effect of being an Incubus, or maybe just sheer luck. He brushed his hand through his dark, wavy hair, looking between Yunho and Blue.

There weren't many things that weren't shared in Yunho's pack, very few secrets existed between the boys, so Blue knew it must be fairly severe for Seonghwa to be hesitating in front of the werewolf.

"Do you need to talk to me in private?" Blue asked. They didn't notice the way that Yunho started to sulk before the other man even got a chance to answer. He wasn't obsessed with Blue. They were, however, attached at the hip and had been for so long that most people found it unnatural being around only one of them or the other outside of classes. Everyone knew they were a package deal. If you wanted Blue, you could count on having to deal with Yunho. So Seonghwa shook his head.

"No, it's fine." He answered, making himself comfortable in the plush armchair pushed into the corner of Blue's dorm. The witch nodded, sitting back down at their desk. "I really hate to do this, I know you're always busy, but I think I might need your help Y/N."

They flipped to a new page in their notebook, already writing Seongwha's name at the top before looking back to him.

"What can I do for you?" They asked. To anyone else, it might have seemed clinical, but the upward tilt at the corner of their lips spoke volumes to their friends.

"I need a...I need something to help me not need to...feed so often." He explained, a pretty flush creeping up his neck as his dark eyes flickered to Yunho. Yunho choked on a flustered cough, dropping his gaze to his hands which were suddenly busying themselves with one of the plushies on Blue's bed. Blue, however, wasn't bothered in the least.

"And has the need been getting stronger lately?" They asked, jotting down a quick note on the page. "Or has this always been a problem for you? Not being able to have enough sex to satiate your hunger?"

It was clear that their lack of discomfort around the topic helped Seonghwa relax, an easy smile starting to creep onto his face.

"It's not been a problem before, not since I was a lot younger. But I'm reaching the peak maturity of a sex demon, it's about time for my hunger to peak, isn't it?" He pointed out. Blue nodded. "It wouldn't be a problem, but I'm too busy to be meeting the need. I just wanted to...improve my quality of life, I guess."

Blue gave another understanding hum, not that they had any experience with an Incubus' need for sex first hand, but they'd read about it plenty. Of course they had. Besides, they'd known Seonghwa since he'd met Yunho back when the two started at the University.

"Have you tried heat suppressants? That's what the nurses recommend, right?" It wasn't exactly the same, but it was supposed to have a similar effect.

"Yeah, I tried, but it didn't help. Just made me feel weird. Hongjoong said they made me smell weird." His nose crinkled at the idea of smelling bad. Blue laughed.

"So Hongjoong doesn't mind you trying to dial your sex drive back? I figured he'd be jumping at the opportunity to sleep with you more." They half scoffed. Hongjoong was a werewolf like Yunho, the leader of the pack. He'd first met Seonghwa during his rut and practically drove the rest of the pack members out of the dorm for a few days.

It made sense, really, for a hungry sex demon to be drawn to someone who couldn't be satiated. A match made in heaven, especially since they bonded not long after. As much as Blue didn't get along with Hongjoong, they made a good couple.

"With his extra class this semester he doesn't have time to keep up with me either." Seonghwa admitted. The two of them had an oddly competitive relationship, Blue chalked that up to Hongjoong being the overly intense, proud bastard that he was.

"Right, so heat suppressants are a no go, have you tried lust potions?" A dumb question considering he wouldn't be here if he hadn't already jumped through all the hoops already, but they had to ask anyway. Seonghwa nodded. "Alright, I'll try to figure something out. Just give me a bit of time. Yunho, library trip?"

The library was a place that both Blue and Yunho frequented, generally together, and generally tucked into the same study room they were in now. It was easier for them to work together behind locked doors where they couldn't be bothered or bother anyone else. There was a precarious stack of books sitting to Blue's left, and a handful more flipped open and spread out on the table. Their notebook was laid in front of them while Yunho slumped back in his chair, spinning his pen around his long fingers.

"So, what's the problem again?" He asked. Blue sighed, rubbing the bridge of their nose before turning back to the books.

"Incubi need sex to live. It feeds them, keeps their souls burning and tied to their bodies. Seonghwa is trying to find a way to obtain the energy he needs without actually having to have sex." They said, drumming their pen against the paper with a dull tap, tap, tap.

"Right. And that's difficult why exactly?"

"Well, if the heat suppressants didn't work, it means that he doesn't need to suppress the need to feed. He needs a supplement. Kinda like....a vitamin." They sat up straighter, pulling one of the books closer to them and flipping through a few pages. "But I'm not sure how to make a supplement for sex. Or if it's even possible."

Yunho took one of the books off the stack, a thick, heavy one on all sorts of advanced potions that he hadn't even begun to study yet. He traced a finger down the index page.

"If anyone can figure it out, it's you. What about a modified aphrodisiac potion?"

"Aphrodisiacs are known to stimulate Incubi hunger. It'll make it worse." They dismissed the idea.

"What if you, like, reversed the effects or something? Like you did for that one project last year."

Blue shook their head again. This did this often, posed a problem to Yunho and let him throw darts. He always missed, never really coming up with a helpful solution, but it did push Blue to think outside of the box, seeking ideas that they couldn't find on their own. And as far as Yunho was concerned, helping them by being incompetent about magic was still helping them and it still did wonders for his ego.

"There's ingredients that wouldn't work properly together. It could cause a lot of problems. I don't think I should be taking that risk unless we really can't figure out something better suited." They picked up a different book, beginning to flip through it.

"I was thinking maybe there's some sort of preexisting magic that we could...I don't know, harness, I guess? Concentrate and manipulate and use as ingredients. It might be difficult, but I don't think that simple ingredients are gonna cut it."

Blue slumped back in their chair, bringing the book closer to their face and scrunching up their nose as they tried to think. It was a habit that they'd had since they were just little, their entire face growing tight when they worked on something hard. It made Yunho want to reach out and smooth away the wrinkles, tell them to relax, remind them that they were downright brilliant and would get there if they just gave themselves time.

"Okay, what kind of magic do you think could help? I don't imagine nature magic could be of much use." He said, doodling on the cover of his own notebook.

"Maybe some sort of love or illusion magic. If I can concentrate that, pour it into a mix sort of like the fuel potion I made, it could act as a substitute for the type of energy they get from sex. Maybe a siren might be able to help? But I don't think there's a way to make that physical." They looked around, scanning the titles of the books they'd been tossing around carelessly. "Have you seen my book on-"

"Sirens and merpeople?" Yunho carefully shifted the books on the table until he could hand them the volume they were looking for. Blue thanked him in a barely there voice, flipping to a chapter about Siren magic. It had always fascinated them, it didn't work the way that most illusion magic did. It was like a spell cast by the Siren's bodies themselves. Nobody had been able to harness it, which led to a whole revolution some hundreds of years ago after a handful of revolts by Sirens in unjust magical study environments, a very nasty thing with lots of losses on both sides, though the Sirens had won their rights and their respect from it. So, all things considered, Blue really didn't expect to be the magical researcher to figure that one out, at least not at such a young age.

"Maybe a Cupid?" Yunho asked. It was an offhanded comment as he picked at a callous on his hand, but the lack of a response caught his attention. He watched with wide eyes as Blue's grin grew.

"Yunho, you might just be a genius." They said. "I'll need to talk to some people, see if they might be willing to transfer a couple samples to me. I haven't worked hands on with Cupid magic before, it's real unpredictable stuff. Hence all the stories and whatnot. They get their names from a truly tragic story, but you know all that already."

"Maybe Mingi can help. He should be back from visiting home soon." Yunho was still beaming from the praise, chest warm.

Yunho's relationship with Mingi was...complicated. They weren't boyfriends, not technically, and it was hard to say if either of them were properly in love with each other, but there was an unrivaled sort of affection there. They were happy when they were together, and they brought out the best in each other. So they were together often, not to mention they shared a room at the pack dorm. Most of the relationships between the pack were like that, hard to define and transcending the typical rules of friendship. They were based on the innate feeling that came from being together. Blue admired that, or maybe they craved that. It was sort of like how they were with Yunho after all the years together.

"Perfect. You'll let me know as soon as he's back, right?" Blue questioned, still flipping through their books. After all, it never hurt to have a backup plan, and a backup backup plan. So on and so forth, they were nothing if not prepared. Yunho just nodded quietly as if it were a dumb question to ask him.

As they continued reading up on all sorts of different magic that may or may not be an effective sex substitute, Blue found their will to stay awake dwindling. Their eyes were heavy, and a glance at the time told them that it was significantly later than they'd realized. It was a few more hours of groggy studying before their head dipped onto their arm, cheek squished against their forearm and eyes shut tight.

Yunho looked up from the essay he was working on about some book published about sixty years before he was born, a fond smile growing on his lips. This was another constant, almost as regular as their library study sessions. Blue was comfortable around Yunho in a way that they weren't with nearly anyone else. They let their guard down enough to find peace with him, to fall into rest even when they weren't trying to. Yunho never said anything about it, lord knows they needed the sleep.

So the two of them stayed put for a while longer, Yunho working on his project and Blue drooling just a little onto their arm. After another hour or so of them not stirring even a little bit, Yunho began to worry about them waking up stiff. So he packed up his things, and cleaned up as many of the books around them as he could without disturbing Blue's nap. Finally, once almost everything was put away, he shook them awake lightly. It took a couple of tries to get them to fully blink their eyes open, squinting up against the fluorescent lights.

"Morning, sleeping beauty." He teased, reaching to brush their hair back into place while they rubbed their eyes. It damn near made his heart ache seeing them like this. It always reminded him of when they were little kids and he'd stop by their house to pick them up on the walk to school. "Do you wanna go back to yours or stay at my place for the night?"

With Mingi gone, there was nobody sharing his room back at the Pack's dorm so, like he generally did, he invited Blue to stay the night. It was closer anyway.

"We can go back to my dorm. Don't wanna bother the pack."

They both knew what that really meant; They didn't want to see Hongjoong in the morning. Despite Blue having a close relationship with everyone in the back, and Hongjoong being in charge, the two of them could never seem to get along. Blue had really tried at first, it was important for Yunho to have a pack and they'd never want to stand in the way of that. Still, no matter how much Yunho played the buffer, the two just couldn't be around each other. So he didn't argue, just stood up and shrugged.

"I'll go put these books on the return cart. Meet you out there, okay?" He easily scooped up the stack of books from the table, piled concerningly high, and managed to nudge the door open.

Blue moved slowly, their body weighed down with grogginess and their brain refusing to focus. Their mind was fogged over with sleep and the fading warmth that hung around with it. But soon enough all of their things were neatly organized in their bag and they found Yunho waiting right where he said he would.

The walk back to Blue's apartment was short, but it was taking longer with them dragging their feet. Yunho silently arranged his backpack to sit against the front of him, crouching down to pick Blue up on his back. Normally they argued, but they never said no to a piggy back ride. This time they didn't even speak as they climbed onto his back and let him take their weight.

Winter was just around the corner, and the late fall air bit at their cheeks and their fingertips. Blue hated the cold, but luckily Yunho played personal space heater, more than happy to hold them close and warm their cold hands in his own.

When they got back, it was late enough into the night that all of Blue's own roommates were asleep besides Yeji, but her nocturnal nature always kept her up more often than she would have liked. But even she was tucked into her room for the night when the door code chimed them in. It was easy for the two to move in unison, taking their shoes off and making for Blue's bedroom. Yunho continued inside, finding clothes in the dresser drawer devoted to him while Blue detoured to the bathroom.

Nights like this were easy, space shared in comfortable silence as they both got ready to sleep. They worked around each other like a well oiled machine, Blue washing their face while Yunho brushed his teeth next to them, taking turns getting changed. Impromptu sleepovers were almost over-practiced. So as Yunho climbed into Blue's bed, taking his side by the wall and waiting for them to finish up, he didn't feel anything less than at home surrounded by the scent of them. Blackberry and vanilla and warm musk cutting the sweetness surrounded him, as it should be in his mind. It was his favorite scent, a vast ocean of Blue that he set himself afloat in, washed away in the calm waves.

When Blue finally came back, they were wrapped in one of Yunho's shirts, face glowy from being freshly washed and eyelids growing heavy with sleep again. They climbed into the bed next to him, and even in his half asleep state, Yunho welcomed them into his arms. He nuzzled his nose against their hair once they'd gotten comfortable. Blue's presence calmed him down from even the worst moods. They smelled like home, and Blue was the closest thing to home that Yunho had anyways.

"Go to sleep," They mumbled, almost as if they could sense the way his mind was sinking dangerously into memories of the past. Thinking about his childhood had a habit of keeping Yunho awake at night more often than he cared to admit, but Blue could read him like a book. They saw through him when he'd act like he got enough sleep, or when he'd wake up beside them and insist it wasn't because of a nightmare.

"I will. You first," He said. And generally they would argue, they always did with their endlessly caring nature, but they couldn't find the energy to argue this time. They closed their eyes, relaxing next to him.

Yunho laid there for a while, idly stroking Blue's arm until he was sure they'd fallen asleep next to him. Then he was alone with his thoughts, a dangerous pastime. When he was alone with his thoughts, the guilt started to set in all over again. There was a familiar feeling of missing what could have been so badly that it ached settling into his bones, and for a moment it was like he couldn't breathe at all with how heavy it sat on his chest.

The first time that Blue slept beside Yunho was nearly a year after they first met. It was late evening, and he'd been laying in his room at their grandmother's house since morning. He'd gotten much more used to the moons, but sometimes it still brought out a side of him that he was afraid of, a side of him that reminded him on the night he'd lost everything. His home, his family, his humanity.

That was the thought that made him curl in on himself, tears running down his face. He was old enough now that it felt embarrassing to cry like this, so desperately. Nevertheless, the sobs shook his body and his tears stained the pillow under his head. His entire body was still aching from the transformation even after he took the tonic he'd been given.

He'd known Blue was there when he came, but he was too ashamed to face them, too exhausted. He felt like a monster all over again, he shouldn't be trusted to be near anyone, let alone someone who wouldn't hurt a fly. He shivered in the bed then, the only light shining in was from the waning moon through the window, casting the room in an eerie, silvery glow that sent a shock of terror through Yunho's body.

He heard the door creak open, and he buried himself even deeper beneath the worn blanket. He could smell them, the familiar scent signaling the identity of his visitor. He wasn't used to that still, how intense all of his senses were now. It had given him migraines for several months until he adjusted to it. Grandmother said that they'd fade with time. He hadn't had anyone else to ask, so he'd just had to grit his teeth and trust her.

"Yun?" Blue whispered, closing the door behind them and tiptoeing closer to his bedside. "I brought your medicine. You should take it if you're awake."

They sat at the end of the bed, tentatively reaching out to touch his leg, checking to see if he was awake. He jumped nearly out of the bed at the touch. His eyes were so big and round and filled with a terror that made Blue pout.

"Did I scare you? I'm sorry." They held out the vial like a peace offering. Yunho took it with shaky hands.

"You should go," He said, fumbling with the cork in the vial. Blue reached out, touching his hand gently to move it aside and opening the vial for him. He drank the liquid, wincing at the bitterness coating his throat. "It's not safe with me."

Blue furrowed their brow, taking the vial from him and setting it on the table by the bed.

"My grandmother wouldn't let you stay here if you were dangerous," They said, voice entirely matter-of-fact. "Besides, you're just a kid. You can't be so dangerous."

"I'm a werewolf," He argued.

"Yeah, but you're a boy too. And your transformation won't happen again for a month. So I don't think you're very dangerous as just a boy." They poked at his arm as if testing to see if he was stronger than they thought. He was, but they didn't mention anything about that. "You should sleep, you know. You need a lot of rest to recover, that's what my grandmother says."

They were so young, not yet ten, but they spoke like they knew so much more about the world than he did. He nodded. And maybe he knew back then that he'd follow them wherever they led him.

"Do you want me to stay until you fall asleep?" They asked. Yunho hesitated. He didn't want to be alone, but more than that, he wasn't sure if he trusted himself. Blue must have seen the dilemma he was having written across his face, because they shooed him over on the bed and laid down beside him. "Close your eyes."

He did as they said, closing his eyes and breathing them in. They reached out, stroking his hair out of his face like his mother used to, like their grandmother did too.

"I'll stay, you don't have to worry. Just sleep now."

It was such a confident statement, and his mind and heart were yearning to believe it. So he closed his eyes, and Blue fell asleep before he did. Even so, he didn't run away. How could he?

Several more days of tireless research and experiment followed their long night at the library, and several more requests from classmates were filled by Blue in between classes, and homework, and little dates with Yunho at their favorite cafes and the arcade that he frequented with the boys. Finally, Mingi came back from his time away, and Blue was kicking their brain back into high gear.

Yunho was still in class when Blue made it to the pack's dorm, and Blue triple checked the schedule in their phone to make sure that Mingi would be home. They knocked on the door and waited for someone to open it. However, several moments passed by with nobody acknowledging their presence. So they knocked again, louder and longer this time. They'd barely managed to pull their hand away from the door when it swung open. On the other side was Hongjoong, quite possibly the only person in the entire world that simply couldn't stand Blue by presence alone.

"Yunho isn't home yet," He said, moving to let the door close in their face, but Blue pressed their palm against the wood.

"I'm not here for Yunho."

A flicker of confusion, and maybe frustration, washed across Hongjoong's pixieish features as he silently questioned what could have brought them there besides Yunho. Hongjoong wasn't a bad person, at least anyone who knew him well believed that to be true, but he was viciously protective. Much to his chagrin, Blue liked to joke that he was an under-trained guard dog, and he supposed it made some kind of sense. He didn't like feeling like his emotions were out of control, which meant he didn't like having new people in his space. Usually the pack kept their friends and flings out of the dorm, not entirely to keep them away from Hongjoong, but they wouldn't say it was entirely unrelated. But Yunho and Blue had been together for so long that separating them was an act of cruelty, even for Hongjoong.

"Why are you here, then?"

"Is Mingi here? I had a few questions about Cupids, and Yunho said he got home last night." Blue took a step closer in hopes that Hongjoong would move enough to let them in. Unfortunately, he was just as stubborn as they were. He didn't budge, leaving them intimidatingly and uncomfortably close to each other. Despite Hongjoong's relatively small stature, the aura about him was enough to send shivers down anyone's spine. Blue crossed their arms over their chest.

"He just got back, he should have time to relax. He hasn't been home in a while. Besides, don't you spend all of your time with your nose in a book? Can't you get your information from that? Since when do you ask for help?" He scoffed, lips turning up into a sinister smirk. The one he always got when he felt challenged. Blue had been dealing with Hongjoong's inexplicable prejudice for long enough to know that he was all bark and no bite.

"What better way to learn than from the source? But I guess you wouldn't know anything about that. I've never even seen you pick up a book." They pressed even closer, and the way their scent wrapped around him and the warmth of their skin radiated against him was enough to knock Hongjoong back a couple of steps, leaving room for Blue to step past him.

Hongjoong made a sound in his throat, one that couldn't quite be considered a growl, though it still made the hairs on Blue's arms raise. They kicked off their shoes and made themselves at home like they always did. Hongjoong tried not to snap. It wasn't even entirely Blue's fault, the moon was coming around, and he always got unreasonable this time of the cycle. Especially when someone he didn't want around was invading his home.

"Whatever. He's in his room, go bother him instead of me." He returned to the sitting area, flopping into the plush armchair with his phone.

"Whatever you say, Alpha," Blue said, not giving him a chance to bite back before heading for Yunho and Mingi's room.

Getting the pack all together in one dorm had been an ordeal that Hongjoong and Seonghwa had fought through tooth and nail during Blue and Yunho's second year at the University. They'd petitioned the board, claiming that having the pack be separated was detrimental to their health and, in turn, their ability to attend their classes and be upstanding students. It wasn't untrue in the least, being apart from the pack was hard on them all, especially those from pack-oriented species, and the school would have been stupid to fight them and risk stepping on a law or two in the process.

So, the boys had been moved into one of the largest dorms on campus, a four bedroom accommodation with two full bathrooms and a decent kitchen. The living room was a little cramped, but none of them ever minded. As such, all the boys were stacked two to a room, but that tended to work in their favor anyway.

Blue knocked on the door, waiting for the deep cadence of Mingi's voice to invite them in before turning the handle. The Cupid was sitting on his bed, wrapped in a cozy looking hoodie with his platinum hair falling unstyled in his face. When he saw Blue, a grin split his face. The two of them were fairly close given the relationships they'd both built with Yunho.

"Hey Mingi," They greeted, sitting down on Yunho's bed opposite him. "I hope I'm not interrupting you. Yunnie said he'd make sure you made time for me, but I don't wanna bug you."

Mingi shook his head, fingers fidgeting with the charm hanging on his phone case, a gift from Blue for his birthday - imbued with an anti-anxiety charm.

"You're not bothering me, don't worry. I'm not sure what you needed me for, though."

"I'm trying to work on something for a friend, but I'm coming up short. I was thinking that maybe if you teach me about Cupid magic I might be able to figure it out." They explained, flashing a sickeningly sweet smile at him, the one that made people melt to their will.

"Me?" Mingi was surprised, but Blue nodded adamantly.

"Yes, you. You're one of the only people I know that's patient enough to stand me. Plus, you're my favorite Cupid. But don't tell Channie, he'd be so sad." They laughed, fishing in their bag for a notebook and a pen. "So, can you tell me how it works?"

The next half an hour was Mingi trying and sort of failing to explain how Cupids harnessed their magic to guide people to each other. It was an essence, he explained, showing them the shimmering magic that he could produce. It played sort of like a pheromone but in spell form, a magical component of attraction that emulated the feeling of falling in love with someone. Even just being in the presence of Mingi as he let the pink haze sparkle between his palms was making Blue's mind feel a little bit strange. 

Blue reached out, feeling the way the air around the magic pulsed and plucked the magic from Mingi's hand, willing it into their own palm. That was another thing that Blue picked up easily, the manipulation of unfamiliar magic. It was, if they were to be completely transparent, the only reason that they excelled so heavily in their classes. Magic seemed to obey them in a way that it didn't for most people. They swirled the mist around their fingers before drawing a bottle from their bag to cast it into. They watched the way it moved, calm and slow like a miniature galaxy wrapped up in glass.

"You're the best, Mingi. I might be back if I need more help figuring it out. Is that okay?" They asked as they stood up. Mingi got up with them, stretching his arms over his head.

"Please, when have I ever said no to you? You can come over whenever." He said, a shy, sincere smile rising on his face. See, Yunho had a soft spot for Blue, and Ming had a soft spot for Yunho, so what the three of them shared was particularly special. Blue was grateful for it, the knowledge that they could trust Mingi the same way that they did Yunho, and that Mingi would always take care of him if Blue wasn't able to. They smiled at him, reaching out to squeeze his hand before heading for the door with the Cupid hot on their heels.

"I should go. Lots of work to do. But I'll let you know how this goes? We can grab coffee or something?" They said, situating their bag back on their shoulder and sliding their shoes on at the door. They spared a smile and a wave over to where Yeosang and wooyoung were cuddled up in their makeshift movie night nest. "And don't forget about game night at my place on Friday. Everyone's invited, Yunho's idea. Let me know who all is coming."

And with that Blue was back on their way, leaving the building with a bounce in their step as they headed home to pour themselves into Seonghwa's supplement.

It was another two days before Yunho saw Blue, far too long as far as he was concerned. Which was why he turned up at their door, being greeted at the door by one of their roommates on the way out. She smiled and let him in before closing the door behind herself. Their other two roommates were playing some video game in the sitting room, bickering aimlessly about something as they tended to be when he came in. They paused long enough to say hi and tell him that Blue was still cooped up in their room. 

"Can you bring them something to eat? I don't think they've been out since last night." One of them added. He was sweet, a guardian angel with visuals more like a pixie, and he had a habit of keeping his watchful eye on his friends.

"Thanks, Woong." Yunho sighed, grateful that he’d already planned ahead. He knew well that Blue had a habit of locking into whatever project they were working on and completely forgetting their own basic needs.

He didn't bother knocking on the door, knowing they wouldn't answer, expecting it to be one of their roommates checking up on them. He let himself in, and even upon realizing that it was Yunho, Blue didn't look up from the elaborate spread of materials set up on the desk.

"Yunnie, sorry I didn't answer your messages. Been busy," They said, finally sparing a glance and a tired smile over their shoulder. They looked downright exhausted, but that spark in their eye was burning brighter than ever.

"You're almost done now?" He asked, recognizing the look. They were pushing through the last leg now, more determined than they were when they started. He held out the container of food he'd packed from home for them, and they took it. Immediately they set it to the side, returning to stirring the miniature cauldron sitting on their desk.

"I think so. Just a few more minutes, then I can add in the final ingredients and then....I think it'll be all done after that." They smiled, that wholeheartedly proud one that made Yunho feel like his chest was being lit on fire. "Do you wanna try it for me? I wanna make sure I didn't add too much of the Cupid magic concentrate."

The average person may have shied away from being used as a glorified magical lab rat, but Blue was nothing if not diligent, and Yunho had tried so many potions and spells for them that he knew he could trust them with his well-being. Barring the time that they accidentally made his skin start turning blue, but that was apparently some sort of magical allergy. So he nodded and moved to sit down out of their way.

"Do you think it'll still work if I'm not a sex demon? Shouldn't you ask Soyeon or someone to help you out?" He asked. They held up a hand for him to pause, sprinkling a dark powder into the mixture and chanting a few words over it. Once they were done, they spun in their chair to face him.

"It should be enough to see if its intended effects are strong enough. And then I can ask Seonghwa to help me tweak it from there. But I just wanna get it to him as soon as I can. He really seems to be struggling with this."

Yunho scrunched up his nose. From the amount of nights he'd had to sleep with headphones on, it didn't sound like Seonghwa was suffering exactly, but he didn't feel the need to divulge that. Blue turned back to the potion, pouring a small bit of it into a tiny cup and offering it to him.

"Drink. It might still be a little warm, and it probably tastes like ass, but that's what this is for." They explained, offering up a piece of candy along with the potion. He hesitated, looking down at the cup full of deep maroon liquid. He swirled it around the cup before caving under his best friend's heavy gaze. He took a breath, then threw the potion back in one swift move, swallowing it as quickly as he could and trying desperately not to gag at the taste that coated the inside of his mouth. The candy followed quickly after, easing the horror he'd experienced.

"And what exactly is this supposed to do?" He asked, even as he felt a creeping warmth running through him.

"Make you feel like you've just had an orgasm, basically. That afterglow, you know? Sexual satisfaction. That's the feeling that Seonghwa feeds off of." They said it so nonchalantly that Yunho nearly choked. He was no virgin, but he wasn't even sure that he could put a finger on that feeling that Blue was describing. "I would try it for myself, but sometimes I sort of...wish my magic into working on myself. But I haven't managed to do that with anyone else. Not yet."

Yunho was trying to listen, but he was too distracted by the heat radiating through him, the relaxation tugging at his muscles. He shivered, humming out a pleased little sigh. His head felt a little heavy, and his body almost ached with the feeling of relief.

"Yeah, I think it's working." He said. Blue looked over, jotting down a quick note about the way that his face had flushed in their notebook, and Yunho couldn't tell the dull shock of vulnerability apart from the faded shivers of pleasure that thrummed through him. There was something about being so openly observed in that state that he couldn't exactly explain, so he was grateful that they didn't ask.

"Good. We can deliver this tomorrow. Don't think I feel up to the Pack right now," They admitted. Yunho had closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall. He definitely understood that. Despite their sometimes excitable roommates, Blue's dorm was much calmer than his own. Maybe that was a small part of why he escaped to their room so often. Second, always, to spending time with Blue.

"Sure, whatever you want babe." He agreed, opening his eyes to look at them. Blue nearly startled at how dark his gaze was, weighing heavy on them. "How long is this thing supposed to last?"

"A few more minutes. Shouldn't be longer than 30?" They didn't sound sure about that, and Yunho shook his head in disbelief.

"Why do I let you do your little experiments on me, again?"

Blue opened the container of food, finally beginning to eat and setting Yunho's mind at ease.

"Because you love me so much that you'd do anything for me. Duh."

Right. Duh.

Days at the Pack House were always full of chaos. Even the most normal days like this one had a lot going on. To be expected when you had a dorm full of young men of supernatural descent. It was almost time for the moon, which meant that Yunho's anxiety was peaked, and that time of the month was when Blue spent the most time at the dorms. Which, coincidentally, was when Hongjoong spent the most time out of the dorm. Surely unrelated, Yunho insisted, but Blue knew better. And, quite frankly, they were silently grateful for his absence. One moody werewolf was more than enough for them.

But Hongjoong being out when he was at his most vulnerable, or at least at his most volatile, usually meant that Seonghwa went with him to keep him out of trouble. So Blue became something of a dorm mother, helping to keep everything tidy and keep everyone fed.

 It was a good thing for them too, they figured, kept them from diving too deep into their work when they should be taking care of themselves. Surrounding themselves with people who took care of them in return instead of other students who just treated them as some sort of magical ATM was - unsurprisingly - good for their mental health. They sighed, stirring the fried rice they were prepping for everyone's lunches.

Meal prepping wasn't on the metaphorical list of responsibilities for them, but it was a comfort that they found. And Seonghwa let them since it meant everyone was being pampered. So they carefully packed the pork they'd cooked earlier into containers while waiting for the rice to finish up. Meanwhile, San had coaxed Wooyoung and Jongho into playing a game with him in the living room, the entire dorm filled with sounds from the screen and the shouting between the three. Yeosang was curled up in his favorite chair, supposedly working for a project coming due in one of his classes, but his eyes hadn't left the other boys in ages. Blue smiled fondly.

Being with the pack felt like coming home. They'd never had much family. Their parents were always busy, away saving lives and solving problems as part of various magic councils, and their grandmother was generally busy with work, though they spent much of their time working together. So, for a long time, it had really just been Blue and Yunho. Having so many other people treat them like they were part of something laid a blanket of belonging around Blue's shoulders, one they wouldn't trade for the world.

As Blue looked around the living room, the only boys unaccounted for were Mingi and Yunho, likely cooped up together in their room like they generally were when Yunho wasn't feeling his best. Blue remembered how jealous they'd been when Mingi first came stumbling into their lives, watching their other half be swooped up in a whirlwind of someone else. But now they were just grateful. Mingi was all too familiar with anxiety, so it was easy for him to help Yunho when Blue was busy.

Yunho was, in fact, curled up against Mingi's frame, their long limbs tangled together. The low, thrumming ache in his bones was really starting to settle in now with less than two days to the full moon, and his moods were becoming unstable which, as always, led to the usually bright natured boy turning into a recluse in fear of hurting one of his pack mates. They never deserved his attitude, and they were always patient with him, but he'd hurt Wooyoung's feelings one too many times to feel comfortable spending time with them in this state.

Mingi ran his fingers through the other boy's hair, picking up easily on the tension that was building in his body.

"Stop thinking so much," Mingi mumbled. Yunho tucked his head under Mingi's chin with a quiet, puppy-like whine, breathing in the familiar strawberries and cream scent that rolled off of him. It was almost sickeningly sweet, all Cupids tended to be, but he didn't mind it in the least. It blended well with the cologne that he wore, turning the sharp edges smooth on Yunho's senses. He toyed with the hem of Mingi's shirt, seeking something to do with his hands.

A knock came at the door, and Mingi granted them entrance with a soft but gruff 'what?'. Yunho buried his face deeper into his chest, pressing himself somehow even closer. But then Blue was there, leaning over the both of them to stroke Yunho's cheek.

"Wanted to check on your guys. I made extra food in case you're hungry." They said, voice soft like silk in the calm air, nearly lulling Yunho into a trance. This was maybe his favorite place to be. "We're gonna watch a movie while everyone eats so maybe Wooyo will settle down. Jongho is antagonizing him again."

Yunho shook his head. The young banshee's shrieks were already too loud in his ears with plenty of space and a closed door between them. He didn't really feel like facing them head on. Neither Blue nor Mingi argued. Blue leaned down, pressing a kiss to the crown of Yunho's head.

"Alright, well, I'll bring some food anyway. Just in case."

They left, and Yunho felt his chest ache as if it were going to cave in at the distance between them. He always got like this, helplessly clingy with Blue - and sort of with Mingi too, but never like he was with Blue. But they'd been there for him since early on, more than anyone else in his life, and it was as if his entire being knew that there was nobody he could trust the way he trusted Blue.

"They worry about you, you know." Mingi said, pulling away enough to look down at Yunho. The werewolf didn't answer, but his brows pulled together as he thought. He didn't like the idea of making them worry, but he knew that much was out of his control. He'd tried his best to act normal, but it was hard when everything was too loud and every touch made his skin crawl, and his bones felt like they were shattering in his body on some nights. But Blue didn't need to worry about him, he told them that time and time again, but they never listened.

"They shouldn't. They know it's going to happen every month," He grumbled, voice still hardly audible in the room.

"But that's never stopped us. I mean, if you're suffering, it makes sense that they want to fix it. Fixing things is what they do. And you're the person that matters the most to them in the world."

The words weighed on his mind. Of course he knew that the two of them were close, and he wouldn't hesitate to say that they were the most important person in the world to him, a part of his own personal pack as far as he was concerned, but it hadn't fully occurred to him that maybe they felt the same way about him.

"What are you thinking about?" Mingi asked. Yunho didn't get a chance to answer because Blue came back then with two plates of food for them, setting them both carefully on Mingi's desk which was pushed up against the wall between their beds.

"Get some rest. I'll check in one more time when I get ready to go home." They reached down, brushing Yunho's hair from his forehead to press another chaste kiss there, and any thought in his mind was immediately silenced. And just like that they were gone, and the sliver of light from the hallway disappeared, and that ache was back again, and every thought in his mind was so loud that it felt like his head would burst.

"I don't know what I'd do without them." He answered after another few moments of quiet. "It hurts so bad when they're not here with me. I don't want to feel that way."

"Then don't be without them."

Mingi leaned down, pressing a short kiss to Yunho's head, right over where Blue had left theirs, before letting him curl up again, holding him close to his chest.

It was several hours later when Seonghwa dragged Hongjoong home for some rest. He was exhausted, and irritable more than anything. His mood swings were worse than Yunho's, and he had a tendency to hyperfocus even more than usual before the full moon, like his mind could only handle one thought at a time. When they got back, he couldn't even bother saying hi to the rest of his pack - and Blue - who were sprawled out around the living room. The scent of a freshly cooked meal still lingered in the dorm, and the noise from the television was enough to give him a headache, so he headed straight for their room with Seonghwa hot on his heels.

Blue didn't give it a second thought until the end of the movie. It was getting late enough that they should leave soon, or crash on the couch which was always an open invitation in the dorm. But, before that, they headed for Seonghwa's room. They knocked on the door lightly, trying not to bother Hongjoong too much while he rested. When the door opened, it seemed they hadn't succeeded, because Hongjoong stood on the other side, his hair tousled as if he'd been asleep, but his eyes were heavy enough that Blue knew he wasn't getting any rest. If he had just a little more patience for them, they'd have been happy to help him remedy that. There were about a million concoctions to help him sleep.

"Really?" He snapped, a growl rumbling in his chest.

"Calm down, Alpha, I'm just here to give this to Seonghwa. I'll be out of your hair in no time." They said, Despite their teasing words, they were gentle with their tone, much like they were trying to soothe a feral puppy.

"I asked them to come, you can let them in." Seonghwa said. Hongjoong's dark gaze stayed on Blue before he was sulking back off to his desk, the several tabs open on his laptop stealing his attention again. Blue closed the door behind them, letting the darkness engulf the room again, aside from the color shifting LED lights casting slow, colorful stretches of light around the room.

"Here," Blue handed him the bottle. "Drink about a shot once a day and we'll see how it works for you. Just text me about any side effects or anything unusual. Or if it doesn't help anything at all. Then we can work on it a little more until it's just right."

Seonghwa smiled, setting the jar of liquid down.

"You're an absolute lifesaver, you know that? There's nobody like you." He told them. Blue laughed, shrugging off the compliment.

"I just do what I can do. But I have class in the morning, and I think your little wolf might be getting sick of me. I'll see you later, yeah?"

Without another word, Blue saw themselves out of the boys' room, closing the door behind them and stopping by to say goodbye to Yunho and Mingi one more time. They were relieved to see the dishes wiped clean of food. They kissed Yunho's cheek, then Mingi's, and said goodnight.

The next day was going on like any other, about a billion notes spread in front of them on their desk as the professor droned on about the magical compounds that formed celestial magic, and the complex history of divination amongst the human world using them. It would have been fascinating if Professor Lim wasn't such a jumbled teacher. But Blue took notes anyway, copying down everything they wrote onto a separate copy for Yunho who was missing class for the next couple of days until he was feeling well again. The full moon was only one sleep away, and the University was always more than accommodating for those with disabilities, magical or otherwise.

It was in the middle of the last class of the day, a more laid back one thankfully, that Blue's phone started buzzing on their desk. They picked it up quickly, silencing the call. Nobody paid it any mind, but being the definition of a picture perfect student that they were, Blue was mortified. They declined the call from Wooyoung, sending a text that they were in class and would call back later. They were granted another couple of minutes of peace before their phone began to buzz again. They huffed, putting down their pen and declining another call from Wooyoung. The third time, they had half a mind to block him, but a glance at their phone stopped them in their tracks.

It was Hongjoong's number this time, their screen lit up with 'whiny wolf' written across it. They froze, mind coming up with about a hundred terrible options for what could be happening. Hongjoong didn't just call to chit-chat with people, least of all with them. Maybe to ask about some stubborn bit of magic he was dealing with, but he was much too proud to ask them for help with that. It had to be Yunho, he had a habit of getting terribly sick before his transformations, too overwhelmed with his pain and anxiety until he'd worked his body up into a tizzy.

They shoved their phone in their pocket, messily gathering their notes and slipping them into their bag. They stood up, chair scraping against the floor, but they didn't care about that as they took the lecture hall steps as fast as they could. Everyone was working on their respective assignments, so it wasn't too much of an interruption as they explained that there was a family emergency to their professor and booked it into the hall.

They pulled their phone out, the device frantically vibrating in their palm all over again. They swiped to accept the call, pressing it to their ear as they walked fast enough that they were almost running.

"Hongjoong, what the hell is going on? I was in class, what happened?" They hissed, though it was hardly angry. Their mind was too full of worst case scenarios to make room for the usual reactions that they saved for him.

"Get over here now. I don't know what you did, but you're dead, do you hear me?" He growled. Blue was somehow left with more questions than answers as the line went dead. But even so, they knew how protective he was over his pack, they remembered the way he'd ripped into one of the older students for trying to take advantage of Yeosang's sweet disposition to use his magic.

So they picked up their pace, running across campus to the pack dorm, then taking the stairs in hopes that it would counter the elevator wait time. By the time they made it to the door they were breathless, chest aching as their heart pounded against the ribcage. They banged on the door, and a moment later Jongho opened it for them.

"Seonghwa-hyung. He's not doing great. Hongjoong-hyung has been flying off the handle all day," He said, closing the door behind them while they kicked their shoes off and immediately started down the hall. Of all the outcomes they'd imagined, they'd never even begun to consider something being wrong with Seonghwa. Maybe they should have grabbed their medical kit on the way, they thought, but they'd been far too frantic to think ahead.

They knocked on the door, barely finishing before it was tanked open. Hongjoong grabbed their wrist, dragging them inside and slamming the door shut behind them.

"What the fuck did you do him?" He asked, backing Blue into the door. They clenched their fists. They knew that fighting him wasn't the answer when he was like this, especially with his transformation coming. He wouldn't hesitate to hurt them. They nudged past him as gently as they could, walking over to the bed where Seonghwa was laying down, skin shining with a light sheen of sweat. They reached out, brushing his dark hair back to lay a hand to his forehead.

"What's wrong with him? He has a fever, what else?" They asked, pulling out their notebook to jot down his condition. "When did all of this start?"

"He hasn't been able to eat, he could barely stand up. He's...he's weak and exhausted." Hongjoong was pacing now as Blue held their hands above the Incubus' head, muttering a soothing spell under their breath and letting the magic seep into him. "It was after he took that fucking potion or whatever it is that you brought. The suppressant or whatever the hell."

"The supplement? Do you know how much he took?" They stood up, brushing their hands off on their thighs and turning to where the jar was sitting on the bedside. It looked like he'd taken what they'd instructed, a problem with the magic then.

"What you told him to. You're gonna fucking kill him." Hongjoong snapped, baring his teeth while his eyes flickered dangerously. "I told him not to trust your shady magic, but he swore up and down that everyone trusted you, that Yunho tried all your shit and he came out fine."

He scoffed, and Blue crossed their arms.

"I know that you're worried about him, but I need you to work with me here. If you want him to get better any time soon, then you need to calm down. Breathe." Their voice was calm, imbued with a light magical air to try and bring him down. They had enough experience with trying to talk down a wild animal.

"Don't tell me to calm down until your mate is dying and you can't do anything about it. You don't get to do that." He said, voice strained and eyes wild when he looked at them. Nevertheless, he took a deep breath, his fists unclenching at his sides and his frantic pacing coming to a halt.

"Has he had anything to drink?" Hongjoong nodded. "And he's not eaten anything, right? When's the last time the two of you had sex?"

Hongjoong growled then, a real one. He took a few menacing steps towards Blue, but they still didn't back down, tilting their chin up.

"I wouldn't ask for my own fun. I need to know. How long's it been?"

"A couple of days."

"He needs to feed. As soon as possible. Has he been responsive today?" They asked, turning back to Seonghwa. His face was scrunched up like he was in pain, quiet sounds of discomfort coming from his lips, albeit weak and barely there. If it weren't for that, they might not even know that he was conscious at all. "Hwa, baby, can you open your eyes for me?"

He blinked a few times, eyes burning red like they did when his Incubus spirit was taking over. Blue stroked his cheek, tilting his head to get a peek at his teeth where his fangs were beginning to form. Another sign that he was slipping into demon form involuntarily, losing his grip on his own being.

"I know this is awful, but just stay with us for a bit, okay? Gonna make you feel better, I promise. Hongjoongie is here too, he's not gonna let anything happen to you." They cooed sweetly, still emitting that barely noticeable soothing spell.

"I don't know what will happen if he doesn't feed," Blue said, looking over their shoulder at Hongjoong. "I haven't treated an Incubus this far gone before."

Before they could process what was happening, Hongjoong had pinned them to the wall, one hand pressed to their throat and the other arm laid against their shoulders. His gaze was burning through them, something barely contained flickering behind his irises, and Blue immediately felt their stomach drop.

"If he dies, you die next. I don't give a single shit what Yunho has to say about it. You won't step foot near my pack ever again." He growled. "I knew I shouldn't have trusted you from the moment I met you."

Blue refused to flinch away, refused to close their eyes, refused to let the odd mixture of emotions burning inside of them set them ablaze. So they stared him down, slowly inhaling through their nose and ignoring the way that Hongjoong's grip around their throat was beginning to make them feel lightheaded.

"If he dies, it's going to be because you're too pissed to help him." They said, trying to sound calm even when their voice came out tight. "You're fighting the wrong battle right now, Hongjoong. Focus."

There was a beat, then another, and Blue swore that their vision was beginning to tunnel before Hongjoong let go. Then his entire body weight pulled away from them, and they collapsed to the floor. The room was spinning as sucked in a deep, ragged breath and immediately lost it again as they coughed. Their fingers curled against the carpet, trying to regain the sense of confidence that they'd had before this.

It was true, if Seonghwa died, it was all their fault. Hell, if Seonghwa died they could have their magic stripped away all together. If Seonghwa died, their entire life was over. The Pack would never forgive them, not even Yunho, and Blue wouldn't forgive themselves either. They needed to stop panicking, they needed to think. Surely Seonghwa feeding would help, but if it didn't help enough, then what the hell came next? Could a professional fix whatever it was that they'd broken? Should they try to call someone for help?

While Blue curled into themselves on the floor, Hongjoong moved to Seonghwa's side, every ounce of aggressive body language melting into something delicate and careful. He leaned down, pressing a slow kiss to Seonghwa's lips before pushing his hands up under Seonghwa's shirt, dragging it up his torso and then guiding him up enough to take it off.

"Joong," Seonghwa whined, and Hongjoong shushed him with another kiss, his tongue dipping into his lover's mouth and tracing against the sharp points of his fangs.

"It's okay, I'm here. We're gonna fix it." Hongjoong promised, moving down to make quick work of Seonghwa's sweatpants, tugging them down and leaving him in his boxers. His hand ghosted up, tracing over the outline of Seonghwa's cock. "See? Gonna take care of you."

Hongjoong sat back, stripping his upper half and silently cursing the fact that he was still turned on in a situation like that when every part of his being should be taken over by worry. But then Seonghwa was reaching out, grabbing for him weakly, his long fingers curling around Hongjoong's wrist and pulling his hand to run down Seonghwa's toned stomach. Hongjoong huffed out a noise, palming his mate's desperate cock over the absolutely useless cotton of his underwear.

"Gotta let me get my pants off, pet. Just hang on, not gonna leave." Hongjoong promised. He shuffled around, pushing the bottom half of his clothes off in a series of swift movements and kicking them aside.

It was the sound of his jeans thudding to the ground that pulled Blue out of the panic in their mind. With wide, shaken eyes they looked up to see the expanse of Hongjoong's bare back, the dip of his waist down to the curve of his completely naked ass, all on display in front of them. They scrambled back, bracing themselves against the wall and dragging themselves up to their feet. The scene in front of them had them breathless all over again, and a terrible blend of disgust and anxiety and searing arousal began pulsing through them.

Hongjoong maneuvered Seonghwa's legs around his waist once the two of them were fully naked, spitting lewdly into his palm and stroking Seonghwa's length. He was already leaking onto his stomach, arching against the bed and whimpering at the slightest touch. Just from jacking him off, Hongjoong was feeling like he'd combust. The heat in the room had to be rising a good few degrees between them.

"Please," Seonghwa keened, the loudest sound he'd managed to make in hours. "Need you to fuck me, need you inside."

"I know pet, it's okay. I will, I promise." Hongjoong swore, leaning down to kiss Seonghwa slowly one more time before sitting back on his heels. He looked over his shoulder to where Blue was pressed so tightly to the wall that they may as well have been trying to fuse with the paint. Hongjoong, however, looked entirely relaxed, not at all bothered by the show he was putting on. "Either make yourself useful for once in your life or get the fuck out. You don't deserve to watch."

Hongjoong's words sank into Blue's mind, blowing the fog and the panicked thoughts out of the way, and they scrambled for the door. They shut it behind them, the sound resonating through the dorm as they pressed their back to it. They closed their eyes, chest heaving as they chased their breath. They hadn't just seen Hongjoong about to fuck Seonghwa, they hadn't gotten horny over it, and they certainly hadn't almost killed Seonghwa with some rogue magic. None of this was real. They'd go home, they'd go back to bed, and when they woke up, this would all have been some freaky nightmare.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Yunho asked, the door to his room open just enough to reveal him standing there in just his favorite sweatpants, the material slung low on his hips. Not an unusual sight, but hardly one that Blue could handle seeing right then and there. They stared at him, eyes wide and mouth opening and closing as they searched for some sort of excuse for their presence.

"I was...I was just leaving. I should go," They said, heading for the door without another word. They were shoving their feet back into their shoes when Yunho caught up, large hand circling their wrist.

"Hey, are you okay? You look about one wrong move away from a panic attack." He observed. And damn him for being so sweet, and for having those perfect big brown eyes that made them melt. They bit back the fear, and the upset, and the confusion, and plastered a smile on their face.

"No, I'm fine, I'm good. I was just checking on Seonghwa. He didn't feel well. But he's...fine." They managed, albeit unconvincingly. They pulled their hand free. "I'm sorry, Yunnie, but I do gotta go. Sorry, I'll talk to you later? After the moon?"

They didn't give him a chance to answer, letting themselves out and practically leaping down the stairs. The burn of cool fresh air in their lungs couldn't come quickly enough, the sensation sending a chill down their spine and shocking the rest of their reactions out of them. They were still trying to process what had happened inside. Their hands were shaking; Adrenaline, they decided. Their head was hurting too. But one thing was clear to them, they still had to come up with a backup plan in case whatever the fuck they'd just witnessed the beginning of wasn't enough.

Once they were settled back in their dorm, locked behind closed doors and wrapped in their most comforting hoodie, they dropped a text in the dorm group chat to announce that they were working on an important project and couldn't be disturbed for the foreseeable future. If their friends had any questions or concerns, they didn't say anything. But no matter how long they sat there, or how long they stared at their blank sheet of paper, no real solution came into their mind. The tapping of their pen on the desk was steadily driving them crazy, but it was all they could manage to do. The sound rang through their head, echoing over the image of Hongjoong's naked form burned in their mind, and the way he sounded when he talked to Seonghwa. The memory of it was burning hotter than whatever hell they were going to for witnessing it.

They stood up, giving the room a couple of paces back and forth before collapsing onto their bed, palms pressed to their eyes as if it would erase the memory of this entire shitty day.

"Get your shit together," They nearly shouted at themselves, taking a long, deep breath and huffing it back out. They were in for a very long, very difficult night.

Nobody saw Blue for several more days. They were living off the stash of snacks under their bed and the bottled waters that they'd shoved to the back of their closet for events like this. Well, not exactly like this. Most of the time they wouldn't be so worried about the entire world crashing down around them. They'd denied every offer Yunho had made of bringing them takeout, or any requests by their roommates to go out to grab late night snacks with them. They were hardly even sleeping now, too focused on trying to dig their way out of this hole.

Seonghwa had texted, apologizing for the concern as if it was somehow his fault and not theirs. He assured them that other than a heightened hunger, they were doing fine, no signs of starvation or long term effects from the magic. Blue didn't call that fine, especially when he'd sought them out to do just the opposite. They'd been studying until the words blurred together, seeking some sort of reason that this had happened.

It was late into the night, nearly a full week after the incident, and Blue was half asleep, slumped over their notes and ideas, eyes falling shut when their bedroom door opened. They gasped, scrambling to stand up on sleepy legs. But it was just Yunho, the worry on his face bringing a new wave of guilt and exhaustion. They'd not avoided him for this long since they were young, they never went more than a day or two without talking.

"What are you doing here? It's late." They sighed, body nearly giving out as they collapsed back into their desk chair.

"You're avoiding me." Yunho walked closer, pressing a hand to their cheek to check that they weren't feverish. "You look like shit, when's the last time you slept?"

He moved around their room, clearing out some of the snack wrappers and the pile of empty water bottles - or at least trying to limit the mess to one little corner until he had time to properly clean up.

"I don't know. What time is it now?" They asked. Yunho didn't answer that, he knew they didn't really want to know in the first place.

"You need to rest. We can talk about this in the morning. But it's never good news when you coop yourself up in here for this long." He tried not to let out a sigh. At least they'd been eating, that was one less thing for him to fuss over.

"You're not my dad, Yun. I'm fine." They said, but despite their protests they were already standing up, eyelids heavy as they stretched their arms above their head and twisted their back. A series of semi-concerning popping noises followed each move, and Yunho side eyed them. "I'm barely even tired. And I'm sure you came here for something better than telling me to go to bed."

"That's exactly what I came here for. Not the first time." Yunho pulled the blankets on their bed back, nodding for them to get comfortable. They meant it when they said they were barely tired, at least they really thought so. But their spot looked so appealing in the moment, and their entire body was begging to betray them. "Sleep, Bluebell. I mean it."

Blue knew he was serious, he always was when he called them that. No room for teasing or whining.

"Whatever you say," They grumbled, not quite managing to throw in the sarcastic tone they intended. They wiggled their whole body under the blankets, not even managing to stay awake long enough to feel Yunho tuck them in and kiss their cheek.

The second time that Yunho caught Blue's eye, they were outside, a small basket sitting at their side as they picked flowers from the edge of the woods. He peeked his head out of the door to the cabin. He'd been cooped up in his room for ages - which was really just a week or so, but when you're eight or nine that's an eternity - and he'd been itching to catch a glimpse of the other little kid running around.

"Hey," He called. Blue jumped, looking back at him with wide eyes. They gave him a tight lipped smile before turning back to their basket. Yunho didn't like that response very much, so he made his way across the lawn to where they were knelt in the grass. "Your name is Bluebell, right?"

The question made Blue laugh, a pretty giggle rang out like birdsong to match the pretty smile that took up their face. They shook their head.

"No, that's not my name." They said, "Bluebell is a flower."

"But lots of people are named after flowers," Yunho pointed out, his lips downturned into a confused little pout. Blue tipped their head, their little eyebrows furrowed and lips pressed tight. Then they nodded.

"I guess you could name someone Bluebell. What's your name?"

"My name is Yunho."

Their friendship blossomed easily after that, but no matter how many times Blue argued about the name, it stuck around. To Yunho, calling them something unique was his way of showing them that they were special, a little inside joke to remind both of them that even if a nickname was something anyone could use, nobody would have the bond that they did. It stayed that way forever, them being his Blue, and even when it caught on with other people, the nickname reminded them of that little boy that they spent all their time protecting. The one who grew up all alone with the wood nymphs and the moon, the one who would walk them to and from school day after day every year. The boy that stayed by their side even when he was sick of them wanting to study magic instead of playing games with him. Blue knew all the way back then that they had no intention of living without him.

Yunho barely slept that night, he was too worried about making sure that they were okay. Blue always took care of him, and he figured he had to repay them for that every now and then. He took time to tidy up their room, or sometimes wash a load or two of their laundry. The sun was already peeking over the horizon when he crawled into bed with them, pulling them tight to his side and falling asleep to the sound of their gentle snoring.

It was afternoon when Blue woke up to Yunho stretching beside them. They groaned, rubbing at their eyes and curling deeper into the blankets. They were still so tired, but their stomach was starting to ache with hunger, and they probably needed to use the restroom, but both of those things meant getting out from the warm embrace of their bed. Yunho reached down, stroking their cheek gently, and they blinked up at him.

When he looked at them like that, it felt like the entire world stopped spinning, leaving them a little off-kilter. It was the softest gaze, the one that he always saved just for them. He smiled, pinching their cheek before moving his hand entirely.

"Good morning, sleepyhead. How do you feel?" He asked. They didn't answer, just curling closer to him so they could rest their head on his chest. He didn't push it, sliding an arm around them and letting them soak up his body heat.

"I'm sorry you had to take care of me," They said after a while. He shook his head.

"You don't ever have to apologize for that. I'm always gonna take care of you. I promise you that."

They looked up, their faces a little too close, and their hearts both beating in time, just a little too fast now. Blue nipped at their bottom lip, fingers twisting and tugging at the fabric of his shirt. The moment was stretching out, becoming a little too intimate. They pulled themselves away.

"But you have enough on your plate. You shouldn't have to worry about me too."

"I'm going to worry about you. Stop thinking about it." He said, hand coming back to stroke their face again. Blue frowned. "You're my number one priority, so stop trying to argue with me. If you're gonna be reckless, someone has to take care of you, and it's gonna be me. No fighting me about it, yeah? You'll just make it more difficult."

The words carried a sense of finality about them, and even though they wanted to argue, part of Blue was aching to be taken care of just like this. So they nodded, and laid their head back down. It was quiet for a long time, several minutes dragging out until it felt like a century of peace passed between the two of them. And finally, after a long while, Yunho spoke up.

"What had you working so hard that you wouldn't answer my calls?"

Blue didn't answer right away, thinking back to the fight with Hongjoong, to the sight of Seonghwa laying there, pale and weak. To the sight of the two of them naked, the way that Hongjoong spoke and moved with such gentle certainty, the way it had awoken something downright forbidden in them.

"Seonghwa was sick. My supplement didn't work, it made things harder. I'm trying to fix it." They answered quietly. Yunho sighed. He could hear the guilt in their words, the way they put all of the blame on their shoulders.

"It's not your fault. You wouldn't have given it to him if you thought you'd hurt him." He reminded them, nudging Blue so that he could sit up and face them. They pushed themselves to sit up, but they didn't look back.

"I know. But it hurt him anyway, and it didn't even solve his problem in the first place. He came here for a solution, and he came here because he trusted me. I don't even know if he'd accept my help again. Or if he should. But I feel like I have to try, I have to do something. It was...awful. I've never had anything backfire like that before, this is supposed to be easy for me. I could have killed him, Yunho."

"Blue,"

"And I know that I'm probably being reckless. I mean, I never actually thought that much about it before. I didn't think my magic would ever hurt someone. I didn't even know that I was capable of that, and I can barely even stomach doing magic anymore. It feels awful."

"Blue."

"Like, I always try so hard to make sure that everything I'm doing is safe and ethical, and I do all of this research, but I'd never even considered that by doing unregulated research and testing, by allowing innocent people to use my magic, that I could be killing people. I mean, I haven't. But I could"

"Bluebell. Look at me." Yunho snapped. Blue looked up, eyes brimming with tears. Yunho made a soft, wounded sound. He shook his head, dragging them into a hug and rocking them both back and forth. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's okay, I promise. He's okay, and so are you. Just breathe. You're not gonna figure anything out when you're panicking like this. Relax."

Blue closed their eyes, pushing down the wave of tears that were trying to fall, inhaling Yunho's scent, that faint, woody smell of mint, and pine, and fresh morning air. They were so tired, tired of being angry with themselves, and tired of pushing their limits, of trying to meet everyone's expectations. 

"Yunho, I'm so tired," They said, and their voice gave away exactly what they meant. He held them tighter as if hugging them could squeeze all of the negative feelings wrapped up in them back out.

"I'm here. You can rest with me, I've got you now." He promised them. He stroked their hair, tracing their cheek. His touch was gentle, always so careful like they'd shatter into a million pieces if he wasn't. And, for once, Blue really felt like they just might. They leaned into his palm, soaking up his warmth and the calloused touch of his skin.

"What would I do without you?"

"We don't have to worry about that," Yunho laughed. "I'm not going anywhere. You've helped me through my hard times, so it's my turn, right?"

"Can we go to the Noodle Shop?" Blue asked after another long bout of silence. Yunho nodded, mostly just delighted that they'd suggested eating without his prompting. "Let me clean up a little."

Blue stood up, stretching the tension out of their shoulders and heading for the bathroom. They stared in the mirror there, examining their reflection. It was hard to see the differences from how they usually looked, the bags under their eyes and the crease between their brows that hadn't left for a day or more. But they knew regardless that this wasn't how they wanted people to see them. Sure, they'd allowed themselves a moment of relaxation, but that didn't mean they were going to let everyone see behind the curtain.

A quick shower later, they were digging through their closet, pulling on their favorite pair of jeans and one of Yunho's old hoodies. The whole time, he was waiting patiently, the picture of reliability, and for a moment Blue wondered who they had pleased in a past life to deserve someone like him.

Yunho had been a werewolf for years now. They were both grown into teenagers, and somehow the feeling of self loathing that came with every transition never faded away. It had been two days since his last transformation, and he should have gone back to Blue's house by now. He should have checked in, he knew that they'd come looking for him otherwise, but he couldn't find it in him to leave his den.

Waking up after the moon left him with an ache in his bones and a heavy feeling of confusion that he couldn't manage to shake off. What was worse was the blood staining his hands this time around. It wasn't his, he'd checked everywhere. It was staining his clothes too, and he'd scrubbed himself as clean as he could before changing into a clean set. He'd never had this problem before, half the time he wasn't even sure that he left the den. But now he'd hurt something, maybe someone, and the idea of facing anyone after that, after knowing that he wasn't fully in control, that he'd always be a threat, he couldn't stomach that.

It was evening when Blue came out to find him. It was dangerous for them to be that deep in the woods alone, especially so late, but that didn't stop them from seeking Yunho out.

"Yunho," They called from outside, not willing to encroach on his space. He flinched at the sound of their voice, and even though everything in him wanted to hide away more, to dig himself in deeper and not look them in the eye, he couldn't leave them out there all by themselves as the sun went down.

"You shouldn't be out here," He said, running a hand through his hair. His skin felt different now, like it was stained so deep that scrubbing off the evidence wasn't enough, but maybe that was in his head. Blue took his words as an invitation to duck into the small opening of his home. It was clear to them immediately even in the dim lighting of his lanterns, that he hadn't slept well the past two nights.

"You shouldn't either. You didn't come home, I thought something happened to you." They reached out, grabbing his wrist and tugging him this way and that, diligently checking to make sure that he wasn't injured anywhere.

"I'm fine. You should go back." He said, pulling his arm back and shrinking into himself. Blue narrowed their eyes at him.

"Not without you. What's going on with you?" They asked him, their voice harsh and making it unbearably clear that they were hurt. The way they looked at him, however, betrayed the undercurrent of concern that ran through them.

"Nothing."

"Don't you lie to me, Jeong Yunho. I know you better than you know yourself." They snapped, and Yunho looked at them with big brown eyes that were all too quick to fill with tears. Immediately the harshness that Blue had shown was gone as they rushed closer, reaching up with gentle hands to cradle his face. "Hey, hey, you're okay. What's the matter? Don't cry."

"I'm a monster. You aren't safe with me, nobody is. I'm dangerous." He sobbed, tears streaming in torrents down his face. Blue had no idea what to do, they'd never seen Yunho break down like this. Not the day he came home to them, or when he'd confirmed that his parents were gone, or even after his first full transformation. For as long as they could remember, he'd been their rock, their ray of sunshine. He was supposed to be all bright smiles and contagious laughter. It was devastating to see him fall apart in their hands.

"Don't say that. You're no monster." They said, using the sleeve of their hoodie to gently dab away his tears. "Look at me. You're perfect. You'd never hurt a fly, let alone a person. You're a good person."

"There was blood. I did something, and I don't even know what it was. I couldn't have stopped it." His entire body was shaking with his sobs now, his hands clutching desperately at the hem of Blue's hoodie like he was scared that his confession would drive them away from him.

"You don't know what happened, Yunho, that wasn't you. Maybe you were defending yourself. You wouldn't do anything like that if you were in control. That doesn't make you a monster." They promised, pulling him in until his frame melted against theirs, face tucked into the crook of their neck.

Yunho had never felt like this before, so vulnerable and broken yet so wholeheartedly safe. It was like having Blue with him was enough to dull the pain, the insecurity. They would do anything to keep him from believing the worst about himself.

"I'm scared," He whispered. They shushed him gently, stroking their fingers through his hair and trying to avoid the knots from his lack of a shower since the moon.

"I know. But you're not alone. I promise."

The living room of the Pack dorm was always crowded on study night with Blue. It was one of the only ways that they could get some of the members to actually sit down and face doing their work instead of complaining about not understanding. It wasn't that they didn't get it, but Blue found that they had a tendency to psych themselves out. Thankfully, the pack had discovered that they had a way with poking and prodding at the boys until they were right where they should be, until everything made sense. And, best of all, they managed to make sure everyone came out of things feeling confident.

This one was a special study session, partially because midterm exams were coming up, and Seonghwa had managed to coax Hongjoong out of his room, though he wasn't exactly a part of anything. He had his headphones clamped firmly over his ears and his laptop propped on the arm of the chair he was in, working on some music project from the looks of it, but he wasn't hesitating to send burning glares towards Blue every now and then.

Blue was sitting on the floor in front of the couch where Yunho and Jongho were working on a project together, something about the history of demonic bonds and trades with the human race, Blue wasn't entirely sure. Across the coffee table from them, Yeosang was typing away at his computer, and Seonghwa was sitting behind him, taking notes from his Fae Literature textbook. He was doing significantly better than the last time that they'd been over, and he didn't seem upset about the issue with their work in the least. That alone helped to ease their worries.

"Blue," Wooyoung whined, head dropping on Blue's shoulder. They reached up and tousled his dark waves. He was sitting on their right, San on their left. Only Mingi was missing since he was off working on a group project.

"Yes, Wooyoungie?" They asked, leaning over to look at the sheet of problems he was working through. They gently pushed his head back towards his work. "Finish two more before you take a break. I know you can do these two."

They doodled a little star by each of the problems they pointed out before giving Wooyoung a little kiss on the cheek. Yunho smiled, watching for a moment before turning his attention back to Jongho. It was comforting how easily the two parts of his family fit together.

It was then that Hongjoong took his headphones off and got up to grab a snack from the kitchen cupboard. He would have much rather stayed cooped up in his room until Blue left or fell asleep. But he guessed this past few weeks had been getting to him, and trying to leave Seonghwa unattended in their presence was too much to ask of himself.

There was a sort of reliance that his pack had on him. It was his job to lead them, to sort out their issues and make them feel safe and at home. He'd been the one to bring them all together. Yunho had been his first pack member, and Hongjoong had never felt quite as comfortable as he had once he'd found him. Unlike Yunho, Hongjoong had been born to a wolf pack. He knew what it felt like to belong, but once he was old enough to go on his own, he'd lost that bond. Yunho helped him bring it back.

He hadn't expected to pick up the others, the non-wolves, but he knew what that bond was supposed to feel like and he'd be damned if anyone took them from him. It was his nature that drew him to his pack, they all fit together like pieces of a puzzle, creating something so natural that it almost felt like magic. They belonged together. So he couldn't entirely understand the connection that all of them had with Blue. And sure, he guessed that it made sense to an extent, the relationship that Yunho had with them went far beyond friendship, even if the younger wolf wasn't fully aware of that, and maybe it could be natural for Yunho's packmates to feel some type of bond with his chosen one too, but for Hongjoong it just felt wrong; The feeling he got around Blue was too hot, too sharp, too all-consuming, and he couldn't decipher it. It felt like the world was punishing him for something that he couldn't begin to figure out.

He watched the way that San asked Blue about his homework, and the way that they diligently explained the concepts to him and emphasized them with a reassuring pat on his shoulder. They were so patient, even with Wooyoung clinging to their side, pouting and whining about how he'd never be able to understand Applied Magic in Mathematics (which Hongjoong couldn't really fault him for, that shit made no sense. How could there be an entire course on the rules of exceptions?) Every time that Blue was in his dorm, surrounded by his pack, it was like they belonged there, and no part of him was willing to accept that.

"Joong," Seonghwa called, and Hongjoong looked up from the bag of chips he was opening. "What have you been working on?"

See, the thing about Seonghwa was that Hongjoong could hardly ever say no to him. He insisted it was something to do with the demon's magic. Seonghwa, however, insisted that his magic didn't work that way and Hongjoong was just down horrendously bad. The pack tended to agree. He tensed for a moment now that everyone was turning their attention to him. He tried to calm down, to let the familiarity of his home and his pack distract him from all the frustration he was harboring.

He walked back over and slotted himself in between Seonghwa and Yeosang, offering to share his snack. Blue flashed him a look, eyes wide. They hadn't seen each other since the incident, and when Hongjoong met their eye, there was something unfamiliar in them, something that put Blue on edge. They shifted in their seat, looking between him and Hwa. Hongjoong didn't relish in their discomfort, but he wouldn't say that he wasn't at least a little pleased to see that he still held some power. Was it so wrong to want an intruder in his home to feel threatened?

"Have you been working on your songs all day, hyung?" Wooyoung asked, putting down his pencil and disregarding the work he'd been doing. Hongjoong nodded, and Seonghwa half sighed, reaching a hand up to rub the back of Hongjoong's neck. He wasn't usually a fan of affection like this in front of others, but with how tight his shoulders were getting, he let himself melt into it a little more than usual.

"You shouldn't work so hard." Seonghwa scolded him, but Hongjoong only grumbled in response and rolled his eyes. He'd sat through this lecture enough times.

Hongjoong had come to the University to study multicultural music and magic tech, so he often spent his time writing and producing music for use in various areas of magic. Honestly, Blue found it sort of inspiring. 

"Can we hear it?" Yunho asked. Everyone knew that Hongjoong was protective over his magic, working on it tirelessly and insisting that nothing was ever good enough. Though his grades in all of his classes implied otherwise.

"It's not done yet," He answered, reaching for a few chips. "Maybe once it's finished."

"You never think your songs are finished," Jongho pointed out, looking up from his laptop. Hongjoong glared at the Hellhound, but he just laughed and went back to his work.

"Can we at least hear a demo?" Yunho asked. For a moment Hongjoong regretted even letting them know he was working on something at all. They always got like this, so nosy and supportive that it was mildly suffocating. But he couldn't really be mad that people cared about him, that was more than a lot of people in the world. He was lucky to have them, he knew that. He stretched to grab his laptop, opening up a file with his demos in it and started one up.

It was good, everyone knew it would be. They were honored to be one of the only people outside of the pack to get to hear Hongjoong's songs like this, and hear how they grew from beginning to end. They could feel the magic weaved into each track, the careful use of incantations in the lyrics and the power each instrument held in the overarching sound. It amazed them, and they had yet to dislike a single track.

"It's really good. Is that the one you're still working on?" Wooyoung asked, a grin lighting up his face. Hongjoong nodded, closing his laptop and setting it aside.

"I really like it. It sounds a lot like your older stuff, I think. Better than the last one." San added.

A couple of the boys laughed, and Blue nearly snorted. Everyone had listened to San complain for ages about having to hear Hongjoong's last track a hundred and one times. His own fault for asking to help with it. Now even hearing the title of the song made him throw a hissy fit.

"The last one was good!" Hongjoong argued, a growl reverberating in his chest.

"I loved the last one." Blue shrugged. Hongjoong's eyes were on them as they continued. "I will forever and always be a Desire supremacist. I'm San's worst nightmare."

San immediately started whining, but Hongjoong just stood up. He was honestly a little shaken at being addressed so casually, so gently by Blue. He didn't really think of them as friends, but they were still so kind to him and, in truth, it sort of pissed him off.

"I'm going to work in my room." He said, gathering his things to leave. His chest was aching with how hard his heart was pounding in his chest. With the door closed behind him, firmly separating him and the rest of the world, he pressed his palm over his chest.

He knew that he was the asshole in this situation, and part of him really did want to feel bad because, somehow, the worst part of everything was that there was nothing wrong with Blue. They were a good person, maybe too good, and they took amazing care of Yunho, of his entire pack, and he hated that. They'd never been mean to him, at least no more than he deserved, but being around them aggravated him in ways that he couldn't begin to explain.

He thought back to the day he'd been taking care of Seonghwa, the way that his mate had been fading so fast he couldn't even think properly. He didn't know that Wooyoung had called Blue before he did, but he remembered the way that his hands shook when he finally called them, the way his wolf was screaming to take over. He hadn't felt that out of control in a long time, just so goddamn helpless. He needed to protect Seonghwa, his pack was one of the only things that had ever really mattered to him, and his pride had been ripped to shreds when the only thing that he could think to do was call someone else. To call Blue of all fucking people. But they'd come, of course they had. They'd come running the second he called because that's what they did. In some fucked up way, Hongjoong was very much aware that he and Blue weren't so different after all.

"You're being an idiot." Hongjoong snapped, whirling around to look at Seonghwa. Honestly, he knew this conversation was coming and that only made him more sick of it. It was later the same day when Seonghwa mentioned wanting to work with Blue on his supplement again. He wasn't generally one to turn on Seonghwa, but there was one thing that he couldn't tolerate and it was watching his mate put his safety on the line.

Seonghwa didn't even flinch at his outburst. Honestly, he'd seen it coming. He knew Hongjoong, knew his body language. The Incubus frowned, crossing his arms across his chest. He straightened up in his spot, sitting at the edge of their shared bed.

"I appreciate your input, but it isn't up for debate." He responded. Hongjoong growled, beginning to pace the room again. Seonghwa hated seeing him stressed out like this.

"You could have died. You said yourself that you'd never been that close to losing yourself before." Hongjoong said. His voice was sharp around the edges as he thought back to that day again. Honestly, he hadn't stopped thinking about it. It haunted him, watching Seonghwa barely able to speak. If he'd waited just a little longer to call for help, he might have lost him altogether, lost an entire piece of his soul. Fuck, he'd had to call for help in the first place and that was all Blue's fault. His job was to take care of Seonghwa, of all of them, and he had never had a problem doing so before then, so clearly the issue wasn't him. It couldn't be.

"But I didn't. You can't blame them because I had an adverse reaction to some magic. It's like an allergy, how could they have known?" Seonghwa tried to reason. "I want to solve this problem, and nobody has been able to help me. If they might be able to, then I want them to try."

"Why them? You could ask anyone."

"Because I trust them."

"I don't."

"But Yunho does. Everyone else does."

"Then maybe they're all idiots, too. Maybe you're all being stupid." Hongjoong was losing this fight, he knew that. He generally lost fights with Seonghwa. Unlike the demon, he was quick to anger and slow to cool down. Seonghwa didn't answer that, he didn't need to. Hongjoong took a moment to breathe. "I don't understand what you all love about them so much. I don't get it. The entire pack is obsessed with them, and Yunho trusts them with his life. More than he trusts anyone, even Mingi."

"They've been there for him longer than you have. You have to accept that we'll never really know what the two of them have been through. And you have to accept that he's imprinted on them, you can't change that. We should just be grateful that they take such good care of him."

Seonghwa stood up, tentatively stepping towards his mate as if he were a cornered animal. Hongjoong was quiet, defeated. He let Seonghwa take his hand, the warmth reminding him of who he was talking to. He closed his eyes and let out a long sigh.

"I am grateful. That's not it."

"Then what is it? They're good for everyone. That's all you've ever cared about with other people. Everyone gets along with them, and they're always willing to help."

Hongjoong wished beyond all wishing that any of these things made it easier for him. Not all wishes come true, though, and he was being made very aware of that.

"I don't know. Can we just forget it? If anything happens to you again, though, you're not doing this anymore. I'm not going to let them experiment with some bullshit magic until they do something that they can't fix."

Seonghwa nodded, less of an agreement and more of a show of surrender for the time being. The conversation was less than productive now, so surely it could wait for a better time. He knew well that there was no use in talking to Hongjoong when he was feeling threatened.

The fight was inevitable, and it had tensions high in the dorm even if nobody else knew what was happening. Yunho had taken to spending even more of his time outside of classes at Blue's place, and Wooyoung was spending more time with his other friends than usual. The only member particularly willing to withstand Hongjoong's terrible attitude was Jongho, but the Hellhound was built to withstand much worse than a moody werewolf.

However, after a few days of bickering and brooding, Hongjoong decided that the best way to handle things was confronting his problem head on. He knocked on Blue's front door, waiting impatiently for them to answer. When they didn't show their face quickly enough, he banged on it louder. When they did whip the door open, they looked exhausted, and Hongjoong had to will himself not to ask them if they were okay. He clenched his jaw, and Blue rolled their eyes.

"What is it now? I'm busy." But they were nicer than Hongjoong in the long run, everyone knew that. As they retreated back into their dorm, they left the door open for him to follow if he so desired. He didn't exactly, desire that is, but he followed them anyway. He closed the door behind him, growing somehow more frustrated that they were hardly paying attention to him at all.

"I came to talk to you about your little project with Seonghwa." He said.

They stopped, turning back to look at him. They looked significantly more worried now, which eased his mind more than he wanted it to. At least they cared enough to worry about him, that reassured him, but not enough to lay down his arms.

"Is he doing okay?"

"I want you to stay away from him. From all of my pack." Hongjoong said, crossing his arms over his chest. The wait that his body sank into such a confident gait pissed Blue off, maybe even more than his words themselves.

"And who exactly do you think you are to tell me who I can and cannot spend my time with?" They asked, eyes narrowing in his direction.

"I'm the head of their pack." He answered as if it were obvious. Blue stepped towards them in two long strides.

"And as the leader of their pack, it's your job to take care of them. Not control them."

"I am taking care of them."

"Really? Because to me it looks like you're taking care of your own fragile ego. You're afraid that if anyone else is nice to them they'll realize how shitty you've been. And you just couldn't live with yourself then. I don't know how they put up with this bullshit. Go tell them to stay away from me, but I don't have to listen to a damn word you say." Blue snapped, their rage and frustration radiating off of them, a stifling wave of heat.

"You watch your fucking mouth." Hongjoong growled. Before he even finished speaking, he had Blue against the wall again, just like they'd been before. His face was dangerously close now, teeth bared and fangs sharpening before Blue's eyes. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. They're my pack, that has nothing to do with you."

"You're just mad because I had him first." Blue said, voice shockingly smooth despite the wincing pain in their back from the collision with the wall. Hongjoong faltered, his snarl dropped for a second to give way to complete shock at their statement, then his eyes were blazing even hotter with unspoken emotion, things he'd never even considered before this.

"Shut your mouth before I shut it for you," He warned. He pressed closer, too close. He could feel Blue's body heat radiating off of them, making the tiny bit of space between them feel like it was scorching. He didn't flinch, neither did they.

"If you think your empty threats and your stupid attitude scare me, you'd better think again. I stopped being afraid of you a long time ago, Kim Hongjoong."

If it weren't for the slightly soured notes of their scent, and the way that Hongjoong could feel their pulse under his touch, he probably would have believed them. They were good at this, the acting bit, the pretending that they weren't being consumed by this the way that he was. Hongjoong didn't like that. He wanted to hear what they really thought, wanted them to give in, to cave under the pressure.

"Get off of me."

"Stay away from my pack."

"What are you gonna do if I don't? Kill me? Lock them in a fucking cage? Or just come here to push me around and threaten me some more?" They spat back. Hongjoong flinched, his weight slowly easing off of them. But they didn't move, and the tiny bit of space between them didn't grow any wider. They just looked at each other, angry and burning and so alive.

Neither of them knew exactly who kissed the other first, but Hongjoong wouldn't be surprised if it was him. But it didn't matter with the way that Blue's hands were in his hair, pulling him closer, opening their mouth to let him in as he crowded them against the wall. The hands that had been pinning them in place slid down to their waist, dragging them into him until their fronts were pushed flush against each other.

He pulled away only when his lungs began to burn, firmly tipping their chin up to nose along their neck. He dragged his fangs over the soft, clear skin there, down to the crook of their neck. He breathed them in. Blackberry, vanilla, sweet honeyed musk. Familiar and infuriating and fucking intoxicating. He growled. His hands slid under their shirt, forcing it out of his way to feel along the expanse of warm skin under his palms.

"Hongjoong," They breathed out, the sound clipped off by a throaty moan when he bit harshly against their shoulder, just the tiniest pinpricks through their skin. His tongue dragged over the spot, soothing it. That would certainly leave a mark. Hearing his name like that, a prayer on his lips, it was a drug he needed more of.

"Bedroom." He pulled them away from the wall and spun them towards the bedrooms. They led the way, opening their bedroom door and pushing him inside. They were kissing again before the door was fully closed, only ever pulling apart enough to tug their clothes off, discarding their shirts one and then the other until they could explore the fully bared territory of each others upper bodies.

Hongjoong pushed them onto the bed, maybe harder than necessary, but they didn't complain even with their gasp and stunted cry of surprise when their back bounced against the mattress. He lingered over them, tugging their pants off with a couple of harsh pulls, leaving them so close to naked beneath him.

There was a sick sense of pride that felt like ice spreading in his chest - foreign, and sharp, and almost unwelcome - as he looked down at them. He got them like this first. He was in control. Not Blue, not Yunho, or Seonghwa, or anyone else in his fucking life. Just him. He was coming out on top. He had conquered.

He slotted himself between their thighs, kissing them again. Each kiss was hungrier than the last, not as calculated as he would have been under different circumstances. Their teeth clashed, and they nipped at the skin of each other's lips, the mix of tongue, and spit, and huffed out whines should have been borderline disgusting, but neither of them could get enough of it. Hongjoong sat back, and Blue propped themselves on an elbow to chase him until he was out of reach.

His hands slid up their front, finding their nipples and circling his thumbs around them. He started slow before he progressed to toying with them harshly with both hands, tugging and twisting hard enough the Blue's hand flew to one of his wrists. He knocked their hand away, leaning down to soothe the sting with his tongue. He suckled one nipple, then the other, teasing his fangs against it and reveling in the way they whined for him.

"Hongjoong, please." They gasped, nails digging into the flesh of his forearms, leaving pretty little crescent moons against his skin.

"Please, what?" He asked, lips quirking into a smirk that sent another wave of arousal through Blue's body. They huffed, and Hongjoong sat up, shifting so his hips were pressed flush against theirs. He was hard, painfully so, and the friction between the two of them was more of a tease than it was any sort of relief.

"Fuck me," Blue said, but they weren't begging, not really demanding either. Still, Hongjoong was too worked up to argue. The anger was bleeding into arousal and leaving his mind foggy and locked in on nothing but feeling Blue wrapped around him, on watching them fall apart just for him.

Blue reached into the drawer beside them, pulling out a bottle of lube and tossing it to them with a challenging glint in their eye. Hongjoong stared back, not wanting to give in to anything they offered him, but that urge was hardly enough to stop him.

So he shucked off his bottom layers, leaving him completely naked and all too comfortable with being exposed in front of Blue. They weren't complaining, their eyes following the planes of his toned stomach, the muscle of his thighs, all leading them to the pretty cock sitting between his legs.

While Hongjoong popped the cap of the lube and coated his length with it, Blue wiggled out of their underwear so the two of them were back on even ground. Hongjoong settled on the bed on his knees, tugging at Blue's hip hard enough to half force them to flip onto their front. He slapped their ass, the sound resonating in the room.

"Ass up," He ordered. They listened without hesitation, lifting themselves up onto their knees to present themselves for him, back arched so prettily beneath him. He smoothed one of his hands along their back, the other spreading them open to watch the way their hole clenched around nothing at the lightest touch. He spanked them again, and again, and a few more times after that until they were practically panting into their pillows, leaking arousal like a bitch in heat.

He didn't give them any proper warning, just the feeling of his cock lining up with their hole before he started to bully his way inside of them. He wasn't terribly big, but he was usually a kind lover anyway. If it hadn't been Blue, he would have stretched them open, maybe gone down on them for a while if he was feeling patient, but he was burning much too hot with need to care about that. He needed this, needed to fuck them into the mattress until they couldn't walk, or talk, or think about anything or anyone but him. Him and his dick splitting them open.

Underneath the heavy roll of his hips, Blue whined, feeling him fill them up inch by inch. The stretch ached a little, stinging as he finally laid his hips flush with their ass. Their fingers dug into the comforter on their bed, trying to ground themselves as he immediately pulled back, not giving them a chance to adjust to the feeling.

"Fucking look at you, sucking me in so good," He hissed, hands kneading their ass, spreading them open to watch the way they swallowed his dick, how they opened up just for him. The thought had him going absolutely insane. All he could think about was how warm they felt around him, how he could smell them so much stronger like this. "So tight, s'like you're choking my dick."

His words were strained as he fought to keep up the brutal pace he'd started. Blue buried their face in the bed, muffling the moans and cries that he was dragging out of them with every drag of his dick against their sweet spot. Hongjoong, however, was having none of that. He curled his fingers into their hair, tugging at it hard enough to have them pushing themselves up on their hands, back arching harder and neck curving back. Without something to stop it, the incoherent string of curses and moans filled the air of their room, and Hongjoong soaked it all up.

His hand slid out of their hair, around to wrap around their throat. He wasn't choking them, just reminding them that he could, holding them and pulling them closer to him until their fingertips were barely brushing the bed. He leaned down, his chest pressing into their back and his nose brushing against their jaw. He inhaled, their scents mixing in the room and being weighed down by the musk of sex. He was scenting them, letting himself sink into their skin, claiming them even just for a while. He growled, nipping at the skin of the neck and earning another sharp yelp.

"Needed me so bad, didn't you? Wanted me to fill you up so bad that you just couldn't act right." He hissed, letting their body collapse against the bed again. "That's okay, I can fuck the attitude out of you."

They pressed back into each thrust, fucking themselves onto him even with their thighs starting to shake from the exertion.

"So deep, Joong, please." They buried their face against their arms, too lost in the feeling of their building orgasm to feel any sort of way about what either one of them were saying.

"I know, gonna fuck you so good. Make you all mine. You're just gonna come crawling back for more, aren't you? Gonna beg me to fuck you dumb again." Hongjoong could feel his own control slipping, his grasp on whatever sanity he'd come into this with was gone. He couldn't think, could only listen to the way they chanted his name and the way it sent shockwaves through him.

"Gonna cum," They warned him, but he could already tell with the way they were squeezing him. He gripped their hips tighter, squeezing until his fingerprints were bruised into their soft skin, fucking them until they were nearly crying. He poured his entire soul into fucking them so good that maybe he wouldn't be able to stay angry with them, so hard that maybe they'd realize that this wasn't a fucking game. His knot was swelling, and he probably should have thought about that first as he willed himself to hang in a little longer even when he was so goddamn close.

Blue's high shook their body, making their knees go weak under them as they clung to their pillow like a lifeline. One of their hands flew back to find Hongjoong's over their hip, fingers bumping and linking together as they used him to ground them through it. Every thrust pulled and stretched them in a way that made their vision blur.

Then Hongjoong was pulling out, stroking himself to completion and shooting against their thighs. His orgasm seemed to last forever, so intense and yet not enough. The urge to have them stuck on his cock was strong enough to feel like the earth was tilting on its axis. He swallowed it down, looking at Blue as they relaxed against their bed.

Hongjoong stood up, trying to figure out what sort of fucked up blend of pity and pride was spinning through him. Blue looked tired, or maybe just disinterested in the situation, but that idea made his chest hurt, so he avoided it. He didn't want to think about them at all, or the fact that he'd just had sex with them when that was the last thing he had planned on doing, the last thing he should have done. Especially when he'd just said he never wanted to see them again.

"You can leave now." Blue said, finally pushing themselves to stand up. His cum was still dripping down their legs, and he was trying so hard to stay sane with that visual right in front of him. But they were acting like it was nothing, like they weren't still naked, and marked up, and covered in him. As if their legs weren't visibly shaking under their body weight when Hongjoong could see every sign of what had happened between them. "And you can take your demands with you. If I help Seonghwa is up to him, you can take that up with him at home. As for the rest of them, they have a right to choose who they want to spend their time with. I won't take that away from them, you shouldn't either."

They grabbed something from the laundry, wiping themselves clean before tossing it back. Hongjoong followed their lead, pulling his clothes back on in a hurry. By the time he was slipping into his jeans, they were fully clothed and heading for the bathroom.

"Oh, and Hongjoong?" He looked up at them, noting the cold look in their eye. "Don't come back. You have no business with me."

They closed the door, leaving Hongjoong in their room, the air heavy with the two of them, and his heart sinking so low into his stomach that he felt like he was gonna throw up. What the hell had he just done?

Once Blue cleaned themselves up and made sure that any traces of Hongjoong's presence were gone, they weren't actually sure what to do with themselves. They had never really considered doing something like that with Hongjoong, maybe because he hated their guts. But it was good, they'd be lying if they said they wouldn't be thinking about it in their own time. But now they weren't sure they could show their face at the pack dorm again, or anywhere that Hongjoong might be, actually. Maybe he'd gotten his way and they'd never see any of his pack ever again, because maybe it would be better if they just didn't leave their room. Ever. For any reason.

They didn't realize how long they'd spent pondering their impulsive decisions until Yunho was knocking on their bedroom door. they'd forgotten they'd promised him a movie night to celebrate the end of exams. They froze for a moment until he knocked again.

They stood up, smoothing their hair once more and trying to calm themselves down. Yunho was good at noticing when something was going on in their head, and they really weren't sure how talking to him about this situation would go. Not until they determined what the hell it meant and if it was going to happen again, if it changed anything whatsoever about their confusing ass feelings that they were trying to choke down. They huffed out a broken laugh.

"Blue, lemme in! I can hear you, you know." Yunho whined from outside the door. They finally twisted open the door handle, letting him and the takeout he'd brought into the room. But YUnho didn't move, just looked at them for a concerningly long moment with a slowly growing look of confusion. Blue wondered for a second if maybe he'd developed some sort of mind reading ability because he was certainly searching their eyes for something. Finally he stepped into their room, setting the bag of food on their desk and looking around with narrowed eyes.

"What is going on with you?" Blue asked, trying not to act suspicious. They started opening the bag of food to unpack everything.

Yunho could tell something was off, Blue could see it in the tension in his shoulders, and the way he didn't immediately throw himself onto their bed, in the way that he seemed to be avoiding looking at them now when he'd been practically burning holes into them a moment prior.

"Where is he?" Yunho asked. And when he looked at Blue, it was with an expression they hadn't ever seen on him before. His eyes were dark and weighed heavily as he moved closer. They took a step back for every move forward he made, trying to maintain the distance between them, but his legs were longer, and he was clearly not looking to let them escape. "Did he leave? Did he fucking touch you?"

"Yun, what...what are you on about?" They asked, but it was clear enough when Yunho grabbed at their shoulders, holding them still so he could examine them. One of his hands came up to tilt their head up and to the side, revealing a previously overlooked mark left by none other than his own pack leader. Yunho's breath caught in his throat, and he let out a growl that made Blue shiver.

He tugged at the neckline of their shirt, pulling it out of way to show off a few other love bites on their skin, down to the tiny puncture marks Hongjoong had left behind.

"That bastard," Yunho spat out, letting go of Blue and heading back for the door. They watched him with wide eyes as he put his shoes on, and they rushed to do the same before Yunho's quick stride could take him out of reach, their meal left abandoned on the desk and the door to Blue's dorm slamming shut behind them.

"Hey, what the hell is going on with you?" They asked, grabbing at Yunho's hand just before he reached the stairs. Their touch stopped him in his tracks, and when he looked at them he softened just a little, letting them catch a glimpse of their beloved Yunho before he was hidden behind the walls again. For a moment, their best friend felt so terribly out of reach, even with their fingers intertwined, with the warmth of him seeping into their skin.

"He touched you. He fucked you, didn't he?" Yunho asked. "I'll kill him."

They weren't used to seeing him like this. Yunho was slow to anger, and even when he was upset, it was never like this.

"I can smell him all over you, all over your fucking room. He's dead."

When Yunho pulled his hand away, it was still so gentle as if he were afraid of hurting them. He took off back towards his pack's dorm and, half terrified of what would happen if they didn't, Blue followed behind him.

Back at the dorm, things were quiet for once. The boys were minding their own business, San and Wooyoung curled up on the couch with Yeosang playing a game quietly in front of them. Mingi was tucked away in his room, Jongho too, and Seonghwa was tidying the kitchen after the dinner they'd all had. Hongjoong, however, hadn't left his room since he got home and scrubbed himself clean in the shower, trying to wash the feeling, and the scent, and the guilt of everything he'd done from his skin.

The calm was shattered by the door slamming open, probably hard enough to dent the wall, and certainly loud enough to alert the entire floor of Yunho's anger.

"Hongjoong," He screamed.

The name hung heavy in the air. It wasn't common for Yunho to call his hyungs by name, and never so loud, and deep, and weighted.

Seonghwa was the first person to respond, rounding into the living room. He checked on the others first, a side glance to make sure the three boys weren't overly startled. All of them were just looking on with wide eyes and tensed muscles in case they needed to leap into action.

"What's going on?" Seonghwa asked delicately, looking between Yunho and Blue, who had only just managed to catch up and was breathless and clearly distressed.

"Where is he? Hongjoong, get out here!" Yunho shouted again, taking a step to pass Seonghwa, who reached out to grab his arm. "I know what you did, you bastard. Come on,"

Mingi came out first, looking visibly shaken. If anyone knew Yunho anywhere near as well as Blue did, it was Mingi, and he was certainly not familiar with this side of the wolf either. Jongho's door opened a second later, and he looked more bothered by the noise than anything else.

"Hey, what's up?" Mingi asked, taking a couple cautious steps towards the trio with Jongho following behind.

"I need to talk to Hongjoong. Now." It was the first proper answer that Yunho had given since they got there, and Seonghwa finally stepped away to grab his mate.

"Okay, he'll be out in a second. Just take a breath, okay?" Mingi reached out to massage Yunho's shoulder. Having Mingi at his side calmed him down a little bit, much to Blue's relief, but it was clear that he wasn't over his emotions just yet. "Can you tell us what this is about?"

"Don't worry about it." Yunho said, eyes still trained on the hallway and frame practically blocking Blue from the room. Mingi stepped past him to get to the witch instead.

"What's gotten into him? I've never seen him like this before."

Blue picked at the old, frayed hoodie that they were wearing, one of Yunho's, and maybe Mingi's before that, but it had been in their closet so long they couldn't remember. They wished desperately that it was doing more to make them feel safe at that moment. They shook their head.

"I did something stupid. Really really stupid, and Yunho is pissed. I don't know....I don't..." They sniffled, fighting back tears.

Mingi's expression shifted into one of understanding as Hongjoong finally stepped into the hallway with Seonghwa behind him. As soon as Hongjoong joined the room, any calm that had washed over Yunho was gone again.

"You," He jabbed a finger in the air towards the leader, taking a few steps towards him only for Hongjoong to stand his ground, chin tipped up defiantly. "What the fuck is your problem?"

"Calm down." Hongjoong answered. He looked past Yunho's looming form to where Blue was still standing with Mingi, the Cupid's arm around their shoulder as if to steady them from the shock of what was happening in front of them.

"Don't tell me what to do, you have no right to do that. And don't even think about looking at them, I think you've seen more than enough." He growled, baring his teeth. His fangs were on full display, and his eyes were flickering amber when Hongjoong looked back at him.

"I think we can have this conversation in private."

"Why? Because you don't want everyone to know that you took them from me? Because you know that you're a fucking dick for touching them? You don't have a right to act like I'm the one in the wrong here."

A wave of understanding washed over the room, and everyone looked over at Blue. They shrunk closer to Mingi's side, and he shook his head at his pack mates.

"Nobody said you're in the wrong, now let's take a deep breath and we can talk about this." Hongjoong said. Blue hadn't seen him like this either, his entire being radiating pure dominance, and they could see the other members shrinking away from him. But not Yunho, he puffed his chest out, baring his wolf proudly and without hesitation. Pack leader or not, no level of respect of rank difference could have stopped him from pursuing this battle. The only other member of the pack who moved was Jongho, the de facto protector with his eyes red and his energy darkening enough to dim the lights in the room.

Blue was shaking, and they wanted to run away from the situation entirely, but instead they were rooted in place so firmly that they weren't sure they'd be able to leave even if things turned bloody.

"You knew all along, I know you did, but you couldn't keep your hands to yourself," Yunho growled, poking a finger into the center of Hongjoong's chest. The smaller man huffed out at the feeling, taking a step back from the sheer pressure, but refusing to cave in. "My mate? What, you just had to assert your dominance? Put me in my place? What the hell did I ever do to you?"

"It's not like that," Hongjoong shook his head, and when he looked over at Blue, he looked genuinely remorseful. Blue looked at their feet, the gears turning in their head. Mate. Of course they knew what it meant, but hadn't occurred to them that Yunho may have cross-species imprinted, that he'd imprinted at all.

Their whole lives it had been just the two of them, and then Mingi, then the others. If anything, they'd assumed he'd imprinted on Mingi and they'd all live happily ever after, but now...now every memory of their lives looked a little different in their memory. Their stomach twisted in knots, wave after wave of nausea hitting them.

"Oh, of course it's not." Yunho snapped. His arm wound back to land a punch, but before he could swing, a firm hand gripped his elbow with inhuman strength that had the wolf groaning in pain.

"Don't." Jongho warned, steady and calm amongst everything going on. His aura of darkness had turned a smokey grey, materializing into shadow around him. Yunho's eyes softened when he noticed how hard the Hellhound was fighting, the internal battle of which side to take in his own pack. Then he looked at the others, his entire pack putting distance between themselves and the two wolves clashing in the middle of the dorm, between themselves and him. Wooyoung looked startled, and San looked so wounded that Yunho worried he might have actually hurt him.

And Blue, his beautiful Blue, so close to tears and huddled up in Mingi's arms. His heart shattered, his mind spinning. He didn't know if he was angry, or scared, or just blinded by jealousy, but whatever it was that he was dealing with had him feeling weighed down and wholly out of place.

"You can be mad at me if you want to, but that won't change anything. Did you even talk to them before dragging them here? Do they know what's happening?" Hongjoong asked, trying not to let his emotions come through in his voice, but his own anger and bitterness were evident.

Of course he knew that was the problem, he was the villain in the story, but he wasn't ready to back down and admit that. Losing to Yunho was one thing, but it was another entirely to lose to him in front of their entire pack. He wasn't going down without a fight, and he wasn't ready to acknowledge that all of the hurt and anger and frustration were desperately outweighed by guilt and concern. He'd really never meant to hurt Blue, or Yunho, or anyone.

"Did you bond with them? Did you tell anyone? Or did you think that wanting them was enough to make them yours? Because God knows they'll give you whatever the fuck you want. Do you really think I'm scummy enough to do anything they didn't want me to?" Hongjoong pushed on, stalking closer to Yunho, who finally took a step back.

His words hung heavy, and he could feel everyone's eyes on him, the disapproval. He regretted it the second that he said it, but it was too late for him to take them back now.

"Hongjoong," A voice said, soft but firm enough to cut the tension. "Don't say things you'll regret. I think you both need some time to cool down, we can handle this later."

Seonghwa stepped forward, placing himself between the two of them. The room was burning hot, and everyone looked about one second away from snapping or bursting into tears.

"They're my mate. You know how sacred that is. I never would have done this to you," Yunho said after a moment, taking another few slow steps back from the wolf in front of him. "Stay away from us, or you'll regret it. I thought I meant something to you, but clearly you've only ever cared about yourself and your stupid ego."

Those were the last words Yunho ever intended to say to Hongjoong. He turned, taking Blue's hand gently, trying not to scare them more than he already had. As he pulled them out of the dorm, Blue looked back, eyes glossy with tears and dark with desperation as they silently begged Hongjoong to look at them. They were wading through the shame too, through the pain of watching the pack separating because of them. He didn't look up, not a single glance, just watched the floor as the door shut.

The quiet in the room was deafening with Yunho gone. Hongjoong could feel tears pricking his eyes, could feel the building desperation to break down, the weight of it trying to drag him to the ground. He had done a lot of terrible things in his life, he knew damn well that his hands weren't clean, but he'd never imagined that he would carry the weight of destroying his own pack. He had never been so impulsive, and reckless, and cruel, and selfish. And now it was time for him to face the consequences of his actions.

"Hyung," It was Mingi who finally spoke. And Hongjoong prayed that his usual kind, patient words would follow. "Blue? What were you thinking?"

Hongjoong felt the words run right through him. He couldn't breathe, lips parting in a silent gasp as he tried to steady himself. It was true, though, everyone knew from the moment they met him that Yunho had imprinted on Blue, that he just needed the time to realize it, and Hongjoong had taken that from him. Why? Because he was bitter? Because he was self-destructing? Surely he could have destroyed himself in a quicker, less devastating way than this.

"I don't know," He answered.

"You shouldn't have fought with him. You know how he feels about them, and he hadn't even figured it out yet." San said. His voice was gentler, but his words were still a slap in the face.

Nobody else had anything to say as they left, and maybe the silence hurt more. Then it was just him and Seonghwa, and Hongjoong couldn't keep his composure anymore. He sank to the ground at his lover's feet, head in his hands and sobs quaking his body. Seonghwa stepped closer, and laid a hesitant hand to the crown of his head.

"What have I done?" Hongjoong asked, looking up at his lover. Seonghwa just shook his head, lips pursed into a line and silent disappointment painted on his face. Seonghwa gave his head one last stroke before leaving him alone.

The dorm had never felt this quiet or cold to Hongjoong before, he'd never felt so uncomfortable in the home he'd made. He closed his eyes, tipping his face to the sky and sending out a prayer to whatever or whomever it was that was waiting for him at the end of this cruel life. Please, he begged, please let this be over, let him fix this, and - at the end of the line - let him suffer for what he'd done. He deserved that much.

[godisshook]

A Ride to Remember

I had known Liam since high school, he was one of the smartest in our grade, but he barely talked to anyone. I considered him a friend, and would work with him whenever I could. Knowing this I should probably introduce myself, my name is Adama Traore, son of two loving immigrant parents, and luckily, very gay. Later during freshman year, I got a boyfriend, I still remember him fondly as my first kiss, and my first heartbreak. When we broke up junior year, I went into a complete spiral, going to gay bars and hooking up with any guy I could find, neglecting my whole life because of a breakup. I barely spoke to Liam that year, I had heard he got a girlfriend in sophomore year, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. When college applications came around I applied to everywhere I could, just to see who would let me in. I knew that Liam was dead-set on going to Pell College, one of the most selective schools in the country. I applied to Pell too, and when decisions came out, I checked it last. It felt like slow motion when I saw in big letters:

ADAMA TRAORE,

WELCOME TO PELL NATION

I was officially a Dire Wolf (the Pell mascot, it’s lame, I know). I saw on the big board in the front office all the other major acceptances. Liam had a couple, but one stood out, a big wolf paw with his name in it, he got in too. I wasn’t shocked, but this most certainly meant we were going to the same college. While this would be the start to a great conversation, it simply never happened, we had just grown too distant.

Senior year came and went with me seeing little of Liam, and now it was summer break. I was college prepping and my mom was sobbing as she took me shopping for essentials each and every day. One day, I went onto our schools acceptance page on Instagram, and the latest post had a familiar person, at least, a familiar name.

@lgporter876 Hey guys, my name is Liam Porter and I am going to be a freshman at Pell in 2023, i wanna get to know ppl so leave ur snaps in the comments.

He was completely different. The shy sweet guy that I knew from high school had changed entirely. I didnt care though, he was doing his own thing and I was doing mine. I posted a few days after him, and I become flooded with dm’s of sorority girls asking me to be their gay best friend, truly something out of a nightmare if you ask me.

The day before classes, all of my things were moved into my dorm and I met my roommates. Kyle was your average nerd, he had brown curly hair and freckles, and wore glasses with wide rims. Next was Jamie, he was quiet, but stood at 6’2 and was here on a basketball scholarship. I immediately started chatting him up, and tried to see if he could be a potential fling. Finally was Eric. Eric was lanky but wasn’t entirely introverted like Kyle, hanging out with people and even becoming a good friend of mine on campus.

One of the buses drop off a load of students to the dorms, and a familiar face comes out of it with bags in hand:

My mom had barely seen Liam since freshman year, and never caught on that it was him, but I most definitely did. He walks to one of the dorms further down from mine, “There goes my chance to chat with him in the hallways.” I think to myself. I was a Literature major, and from what I knew Liam wanted to study Mechanical Engineering, so there was little chance we would ever see each other in the same class.

I go to my first class of the day: “History of Pre-Columbian Writing and Forms” taught by a frazzled professor who looks no younger than 76 named Dr. Fredericks. He was an awesome teacher, and I actually paid attention in class. Afterward I head to my Civics and Common Law class, it was rather empty, except for Liam. He was sitting in the 5th row, and as I open the door he glances back and meets my eye. I sit in the 7th row, open my computer, and start snooping. Lo and behold, this very class was an optional GenEd for Mechanical Engineering, and Liam chose it. I quickly leave class, and rush to my dorm.

A few weeks pass and my minifridge is empty. After eating the dining hall food for practically a month straight I was tired, so I drove to the gas station near our school to get some snacks and microwave meals. In the far back of the gas station I spot a group of frat bros, from the letters I could make out they were in Delta Zeta Kappa, known as one of the most toxic on campus. Laughing right with them is no other than Liam himself.

“You should’ve fucked her!” one of the bros near him says before patting Liam’s back. I try to quickly pick my stuff up and leave, but one of the other brothers whistles at me. It was Tyler Felton, a guy who I drunkenly hooked up with at one of his frat’s parties. Tyler calls me over and introduces me to each of the other brothers, and they start chuckling and jabbing Tyler in the arm, clearly he’s already talked about me to them. When I shake hands with Liam, it’s bare sly even a touch before he already has his hands pulled away.

Leaving the gas station was rather embarrassing, simply because I could imagine what they would talk about once I left. But Liam, he confused me. I didn’t think we were on bad terms, but by that handshake it seems we were.

I go back to my room and go straight to his instagram to figure out what’s going on. He still follows me, and it’s clear he unfollowed people from high school, so if he hated me why in the world did he still follow me?

I look at his recent posts and my eye catches to one of them:

He had clearly been going to the gym, and even though he might be a jerk now, he’s fucking HOT. I pull down my pants and start masturbating, thinking about feeling those muscles of his and fantasizing about how big his cock must be. I close my eyes and start imagining it, and the thought of it makes me end up getting cum all over my phone, and I immediately start wiping it away with tissues, feeling ashamed that I just came to a picture of a guy who is most definitely straight. After my little session on his insta, I study for my pre-calculus exam, and slowly drift to sleep over my notes. My alarm jolts me awake, as drool is all over my notes from my sudden study sesh coma. I rustle them together into my backpack and head to class for the day. Liam is there (as always) and we don’t speak at all during or after class (as always). As we’re packing up Dr. Stevens, the professor for the Civics course, announces we have a group project, but he’s already picked the partners.

As he rattles off last name pairings, I have yet to hear mine or Liam’s, until-“Mr. Traore, Mr. Porter, you two will be paired for this assignment.” My heart sinks to the very bottom of my chest. The guy who I now have nothing in common with, paired up for a 3-week assignment, nothing could be worse. “I can just handle it and you can get credit.” Liam says as he passes by me to leave class. Before he could fully pass, I grab his arm. He jerks back and stares at me. I glare back, “I will do my part too, I don’t know about you, but I care about this work.” Liam keeps my gaze and smirks. He easily releases his arm from my grasp, and walks away.

I don’t hear from him for a while, but he gets to work on our shared document, as do I. I suddenly get a DM on insta, while I expected it to be Liam, it was Tyler, sending me a flyer to his frat’s Halloween party. While Liam was most definitely going to be there, I just wanted a chance to dress all skimpy, so I accepted the invite.

After getting my sluttiest Daphne costume, i head down with Tyler, who decided to pick me up, and match with me as Fred (against my will mind you). My car had broken down, and I was simply far too broke to get it fixed now. We get to the party and it’s already insane, people are outside, beer pong tables set up everywhere, and girls grinding on all the brothers on the dance floor. I see nothing of Liam, but decide that’s a good thing.

The party goes much as I would have expected, with Tyler finding every way to stay near me, and me trying my very best to escape him when I can. I catch a glance of Liam while I walk for my 9th bathroom break to get away from Tyler. As I walk out, he’s near the door, and pushes me back in. “I want us to talk again.” he says, and before I can even get a word out, he leaves, never to be seen again.

Two days later I get a snap notification from none other than the man himself:

Using a shirtless gym selfie to get back into my good graces is a bold choice, considering i’m “talking to” one of his frat brothers, but I assume it’s all platonic, and send a photo of me studying for my literature exam in my bed back. After snapping back and forth for a few days I assume that will be all there is, and accepted that at least he was talking to me about our project. After checking the project the day before it’s due I see an announcement.

YOU ARE TO USE POSTER BOARD TO PRESENT KEY POINTS, POWERPOINT AND OTHER DIGITAL PROGRAMS WILL NOT BE USEABLE AS THE PROJECTOR IS DEAD.

Dr. Stevens was giving us an extension to find the stuff we needed, and I quickly text Liam to go pick up some poster board as my car is still very much broken. He chats back “come with me.” Confusion swept my face as getting poster board definitely wasn’t a two person job, but he quickly chatted again, “we can work on it together at my place.” Seeing this as a chance to actually reconnect, I say yes, and he comes to pick me up.

I start taking hits of my dab pen in the car, knowing that high me would actually be able to get some work done. As we pull into a residential area, he stops and pulls to the sidewalk. I ask him, “Why in god’s name did you stop here??? The store isn’t for a few more miles.” “I have been waiting for this my whole life.” he replies. Thinking i’m about to get axe murdered by my old friend I try to get out, but the doors are locked. He then says, “I never knew how I felt about you until I saw you with that fucker Tyler, the dude doesn’t deserve a pet rock, much less you.” The sudden romantic shift of his words gives me whiplash, but at least he’s not trying to kill me? As he says this, he puts a hand on my thigh. Even though I had ended my villain era, a little hookup between old friends was just what the doctor ordered.

I get in the base of the seat under him and pull his pants down very slowly. His hard dick pops up out of his underwear, and he glances down at me as I start to suck. He groans loudly and grabs the handle at the top, looking at me straight in the eyes the whole time.

As I continue doing down on him, he says, “I knew this would be the best.” If the rumors were true, he had fucked nearly half the freshman girls, and somehow i’m the best? I smile and keep going until he stops me. With his massive arms he pulls my head up and says, “It’s not over yet.” He pulls his shirt over his head, revealing that hard body and, as he starts the car he says, “Keep sucking.”

On the road in the rain, I keep looking up at this old friend of mine, wondering if i had missed a signal, and as I keep going, he starts to push my head down on his massive cock, and then let’s put a loan moan, as he cums all in my mouth. I swallow it down and look up at him, still listening to his music and focusing on the road.

While still below him, we come to a stop. He unbuckles and gets out, only in his boxers. I shimmy up and stumble out, clearly not at a Walmart or any place we could get poster for that matter. “It’s my cousins place, he’s not home so he lets me stay.” Liam says as if reading my mind. It’s clear what he wants, and I get ready for it.

After getting in he immediately starts kissing me, Unbuttoning my shirt, and pulling down my pants until i’m much like him, only far less muscly and way shorter. He pins me against the wall and starts kissing my nipples, saying, “Do you like that?” as he goes on and on. Eventually he takes me upstairs, and as I do I see him pull his boxers down. He tells me, “Get on the bed.” and I comply.

As i’m under him on the bed, he starts shoving his dick in my ass, pounding and pounding my tight ass and grunting all while doing it. He flexes his muscles in a mirror right next to the bed, which is the only way i can even notice what he’s doing as he’s giving me the best backshots of my life. He tells me to get up and wrap my legs around his, with his cock still in me i maneuver around and do it, and he asks, “Is that better?” After nodding he says, “Good boy.” and I look down, completely falling for him. As he pounds me again, I feel up and down his hard body, and he keeps fucking me ruthlessly.

After pounding my ass until it goes from a dark brown to a purplish tinge, Liam says, “I’ve had a crush on you since forever, but I never knew what to say, and by the time I could you had a boyfriend. I was always looking for a chance but I thought it would never happen, so I worked to be the guy you would want, and I just hope I fucking am.” How had I been so naïve??? He wanted to be with me since freshman year and I was the one to friendzone him. Letting this words sit with me for a while I caress his face and say, “You have always been the guy I wanted, I was just too blind to see.”

He smirks and starts fucking like never before, he takes my hips and moves it towards and away from his cock, grunting each time his cock goes all the way in me. In this moment I don’t see anything else but him, and as he cums in me I pull his body towards me, pulling him into me, and embracing him as our warm sweaty bodies touch. After that we end up continuing for five more rounds, each getting more and more passionate. After that whenever we would see each other after class,we would go into the supply closet and fuck again. I felt like a ball of hormones but it felt good with him.

Finally at present day, with us having been dating for three years, it seems like all of this could’ve been missed if anything had gone wrong. Every moment with him is truly memorable, and even though I never would’ve saw myself with the quiet nerd turned frat guy, I guess that’s what happened. I thank the universe each and every day for that fateful car ride, and as i get ready to graduate, I start thinking that Porter sounds like a perfect last name for me.

[indigostreak-inthesky]

Dripping Honey

Pairings: Danny x reader

Warnings: smut, oral (f receiving) use of hands, like one line about masturbation, 18+ only minors dni!!! , talk of stress/ anxiety

Author’s Note: hello! I have never ever posted or even written anything of this caliber before, but Jooty Nation saw it first & encouraged me to post! Please enjoy :)

(Also yes I did add a Taylor Swift reference in here iykyk)

There are several things you love about being a teacher. Really, there are- you get to be the only smiling face some of your students see all day; you get to share in their excitement when they finally master the concept of long division; you get invited to dance recitals, baseball games, cheer competitions, and theater performances; and above all, you get to build a little family every school year with the children who walk through your door. Because of these things, most of the time, you absolutely love your job. There are just some things that occasionally make it hard to remember why you’re there.

For example, today. It’s the first day back for teachers before students enter the building next week to start a brand new school year, and you walked into your classroom expecting to see your furniture piled neatly where it had been left in May, meticulously labeled with your name and room number. Instead, you walked into a relative shit show- your furniture is spread around the room; desks don’t match; you’re missing a lamp, a bookshelf, and a stepstool; and all of your bulletin boards have been sprayed with wax from the floors sometime during the summer months, meaning you were going to have to take all four of them down and start from scratch. And to top it all off, a dead rat had been waxed to your floor.

With a sigh, you had set your things down and gone to the faculty meeting, spending the better part of the morning in your school’s cafeteria listening to your admin go over staffing and schedule changes, making a list of all the things you needed to do before you left for the day and made it back home, wishing your boyfriend would be there but knowing he was out of town. When you finally made it back to your room, it had taken the rest of your contracted time to hunt down the missing items from your room and return the things that didn’t belong to you to their rightful owners; you weren’t sure what the floor crews had been thinking when they put things away after waxing the floors, but it definitely wasn’t about putting things back where they actually belonged.

Which is why, when you walked through your door after a long first day back, you dropped your gym shoes by the door and immediately face planted into your couch, groaning your frustrations into a pillow and fighting the tears welling up in your eyes. You didn’t notice the bag sitting by your kitchen island, or the pair of lowtop Nike Blazers sitting next to your Birkenstocks by the door. You only realized something was off when you heard the soft sound of footsteps coming from your bedroom, and peeked up to catch a glance of your favorite set of curls before scrambling up off the couch and launching yourself at your boyfriend.

Danny laughed, your favorite sound in the world, and picked you up by the backs of your thighs as you wrapped your legs around his waist. He spun you around gently in a circle before setting you back safely on the ground, leaning down to hold your face between his palms and giving you a soft kiss before you bury your head in his chest once again. “Hi, honey,” came his muffled voice from where he had his head atop yours, placing a kiss on the crown of your head. “Is it safe to say you’re surprised?”

“Daniel Wagner, you weren’t supposed to be home for another week!” you say, looking up into his pretty hazel eyes. “What are you doing here?”

Danny guides you to sit down on the couch, propping his feet up on the coffee table and moving your legs to where they’re laid over his lap, his arm around your shoulders and left hand playing with the cartilage piercings on your left ear; an endearing habit you’ve come to learn he doesn’t realize he’s doing most of the time.

Though your drummer has his own ears pierced, he’s been taken with your piercings since you met in Nashville a year ago. It shocked Danny that an elementary school teacher could have 12 visible piercings in your ears and nose, and now he enjoys helping you pick out new jewelry for your constellation piercings and will pick up fun earrings for your first holes while he’s out on tour, sending pictures of planet earrings that “will be so perfect for your space unit,” or mushroom earrings “because your students need to see what a fungi you are. Get it?” (You got it, you just didn’t want to encourage his terrible joke. You did love the earrings, though.)

Danny gently runs his hand up and down your shin, rousing you from your thoughts and bringing your attention back to the question at hand- what was he doing here?

“We have a couple days off between shows, and I know I said I was going to just hang out with the guys instead of flying back here, but I know how stressful this week is for you every year, plus they all wanted to spend a few days in their own beds, too. We caught an early flight this morning and packed weekender bags, so I’m all yours for the next 3 days, honey!” His small smile broke into a full grin, and Danny spread his arms wide, taking a sarcastic little half bow while sitting next to you.

You feel your eyes well up with tears anew, taken aback by your boyfriend’s selflessness and the magnitude of your love for him. He frowns slightly, pulling you in to nuzzle into his side and rubbing your arms up and down comfortingly. “What’s wrong, honey? Don’t cry, what’s going on?”

“I’m sorry,” you sniffle, “I’m just really thankful for you and I love you a lot. You have no idea how stressed I was today, and I don’t know how I’m going to get my classroom ready in time for Back to School Night on Wednesday, and I missed you so much, and I had to spend all day in meetings and moving furniture by myself and I’m only 5’5” and-” you hiccupped, feeling yourself getting stressed once again as Danny wiped the tears from your cheeks with the pads of his thumbs and pulled you into his chest.

“Don’t be sorry, honey,” he said softly, rocking you both back and forth as you had moved to sit on his lap, legs crossed behind his waist and head on his shoulder. He traced soft circles into your back before pushing you away slightly to brush the hair out of your face and look you in the eyes. “Tomorrow, after your meetings, I’ll come to school and help you move and set up whatever you need to set up. We’ll work until midnight, if we have to, and I’ll order pizza and we can put Star Wars or true crime or the Great British Baking Show onto your SmartBoard, and we’ll get everything done before Wednesday, I promise. But tonight, let’s take a bath, and eat the pasta I made for dinner, and lay down so you can relax before you go back tomorrow, okay? How does that sound?”

You nod your head, leaning in to kiss him softly on the lips and running your hand over the back of his curls. When you part, you rest your forehead against his, placing a peck on his beautiful nose and closing your eyes to just breathe him in, this closeness that you’ve been missing since the start of the tour and unexpectedly get to bask in. “Thank you,” you whisper into the space between your mouths, each breath mingling together. “I love you.”

Danny places another kiss to your lips, lifting you off his lap and leading you to the kitchen by your hand. “I love you, more,” he says.

As you finish dinner and put the dishes into the dishwasher, you hear the faucet turn on from the direction Danny had wandered off in. You place the last dish into the rack and start the wash cycle, padding into the bathroom to find your boyfriend on his knees, testing the temperature of the water with his hand and pouring your favorite lavender epsom salt beneath the surface of the running water. Leaning against the counter behind him, you take the opportunity to study his bare frame; his hair is unruly and has been tucked into a bun on the top of his head, curls springing out from the bottom due to his recent hair cut. His shoulders are broad, muscles rippling with every movement and his arms are bigger than they were when you first met. You feel yourself grow damp just admiring his profile, love and lust swirling in your chest and tummy and creating an almost delirious yearning within you.

Danny turns, a lopsided smile on that mouth that you love so much, and shuts the water off before moving to stand in front of you. “I’m glad you’re enjoying the view, honey, but I think you’re going to enjoy this bath much more.”

You roll your eyes, skimming your hands along his sides and feeling him shiver slightly beneath the scratch of your nails. “I don’t know,” you purr, looking up at him through your lashes. “There isn’t a whole lot I enjoy more than getting to see you naked.”

Danny flicks your nose gently, pulling at the hem of your top to remove it before moving onto your jeans, pulling them off one leg at a time. You don’t miss the way his eyes flare as he struggles a bit to get them past your ass. You place your hands on his shoulders as you step out of your pants, underwear gone with them, and he tosses the jeans to the laundry basket in the corner before softly pushing you to step into the tub. Closing your eyes, you sink beneath the surface of the water, and let out a deep breath you were unaware you had been holding. The temperature was perfect; “boiling alive degrees,” as Danny liked to say, but nevertheless you feel him sink into the tub behind you, hissing a bit as the water hits his skin and pulling you into him so that your back is flush with his chest.

You sit that way for a bit, Danny humming softly and speaking about everything and nothing. It had been almost three weeks since you had seen each other, and your drummer had endless tales from the road of the Kiszka brothers’ shenanigans and fan encounters. He washed your hair for you as you told him about your half of the time apart, how you had gone to see your family a few states away and finished two more books towards your reading goal for the year.

“And then, before one show, they brought a bunch of puppies for us to play with! Did you see that video? They were so cute, even though Jake acted like he had never pet a dog before in his life.” Danny laughed.

You giggled along with him, settling back into his chest once again and sighing. Your need for him had not been satiated, and now, after hearing his voice and his laugh, you felt like you would crawl out of your skin if you couldn’t touch him in some way. Thankfully, Danny’s thoughts seemed to align with your own, and within seconds you felt his hand inch down from your hair to your neck, moving the soaked strands away so that he could place an open-mouthed kiss to the skin between your neck and shoulder blade. Your eyes flutter shut and you let out a small whimper, going to trail your hand up his thigh when his own halts you. Frowning, you turn your head towards him with a question in your eyes.

“Let me take care of you tonight, honey,” Danny says, trailing his hands lower to cup your breasts in his palms. “You worked so hard today, and I know you’re stressed. My sweet, hardworking girl, my good girl; you gonna let me make you feel good?”

“Yes, Danny, please,” you whimper, arching your back so that your chest meets his hands. His fingers, rough from years of gripping his drumsticks and beating on his drums like his life depended on it, find the bars of your nipple piercings and tug. You bite your lip, writhing beneath his touch as he leans down to whisper in your ear.

“I am still in awe of these,” he says in a voice an octave lower than normal, his own arousal evident in the timbre of his words and the hardness you feel against your back. “Can’t believe such a sweet girl has such a dirty, sexy little secret she hides from the world.” He gives another flick to the little sword shaped bars through your nipples, pausing his words to run his nose along the column of your neck and tug the lobe of your ear between his teeth. “You’re only a dirty girl for me, though, right honey?”

You nod feverishly, earning yourself a pinch to the inside of your thigh.

“Words, honey, you know that by now. Who are you a filthy girl for, hm? Who’s the only one that gets to see these little secrets-” he pulls gently again at your pierced tits for emphasis- “and all your soft, pink places?”

You aren’t sure if you’re shivering from the rapidly cooling water temperature or the feelings Danny is evoking in you, but you answer anyways, teeth chattering, “You, Danny, baby, only you.”

Abruptly Danny stands behind you, tugging your body up with his and pulling the plug so that the water drains from the tub. He grabs a towel from the hook on the wall, first drying off your body and then his own. He wastes no time in picking you up by the waist and setting you on the bathroom counter, standing between your legs and stealing your breath away with a kiss.

“What do you want, honey?” he asks in between kisses. “My hands, my mouth, my cock?”

He’s teasing and you both know it, know that he’s stolen your voice with the way his mouth is sucking bruises onto the tops of your breasts and his fingers drumming a beat against the inside of your thigh. If you didn’t know your boyfriend, you might say the tapping of his fingers so close to where you needed him most was absentminded; and if your boyfriend didn’t know you, he might think you were squirming because of the deep purple mark being left right above one of your nipples. You both knew the other like the backs of your hands, though, which means he knew he was working you up with the way both his mouth and hands moved in tandem, and you knew he was drumming into you with purpose.

A whine escapes your throat, every one of your senses flooded with Danny, Danny, Danny. His name was the only thought in your head, just the way he liked it. “Sweet girl, are you already thoughtless?” he teased. “Just give me one word, honey, and it’s yours. Tell me what you want, and I’ll hang the fuckin’ moon for you if that’s what leaves those perfect lips of yours.”

“Y-your mouth, baby,” you almost cry. “I want your mouth.”

Danny’s eyes grow impossibly dark, and his hands grip bruisingly hard onto your hips, scooting you so that half your ass is hanging off the bathroom counter. One massive hand creeps up to circle your throat, tilting your chin up with his thumb and applying just enough pressure to have you open your eyes, unaware that they had even closed in the first place.

“I told you I’d hang the fuckin’ moon for you, and I will, honey; but only if you ask the right way. Be my sweet honey girl and beg for it.”

You knew what he wanted; you’re a few months older than your drummer, enough to have put a year between you in school (which you learned shortly after meeting him) and you have both a Bachelor’s degree and a Master’s degree in Educational fields. Danny graduated high school and immediately dedicated his time to the band, practicing, performing, traveling, and living that dream. He loves the fact that, despite you being older (even if it’s by less than 10 months) and ‘more educated’, you follow his directions when it comes to intimacy. He wants to be in control and guide you, make you beg and grovel for the feeling that only he can give you; and beg you will for even just a taste of the drug that is Daniel Wagner.

“Please, sir. Put your mouth on me, fuck me with your tongue, make my pussy cry from the feeling. Please, only you can make me feel so fucking good I forget my own name, Daddy.” To add to the effect, you bat your eyelashes sweetly and reach out to skim your thumbnail over his nipple. You needn’t have bothered; Danny’s eyes flashed and he crushed your mouth to his in an instant, immediately dominating the kiss by forcing his tongue into your mouth and twisting his fingers into your wet hair. He gave your strands a tug, exposing the bare skin of your jugular to his little fangs and scraping his teeth over the vein before biting down gently.

“My honey girl wants my mouth? She wants me to make that sweet little cunt cry? Oh baby, don’t you worry; I’ll eat you so good. My favorite fuckin’ dessert.”

No sooner had the filthy words left his mouth than did he sink to his knees, spreading your legs even wider and throwing your calves over his shoulders. He pressed the tip of his nose into your center, inhaling deeply as your hands come to rest atop his head and take a light hold into his curls. Danny looks up at you, grinning like a devil from between your legs and sending you a wink before diving in.

Your head hits the mirror when he licks a long strip straight up the center of your pussy, gathering every drop of arousal that had gathered between your legs. “God damn, honey, all this for me?” he asks, nudging your clit with the tip of his nose. God, that nose. You could write an epic poem about that nose and the things it does between your thighs.

You feel a sharp sting on the inside of your left thigh and yelp, glancing down to see Daniel licking over the skin to soothe his bite. “I asked you a question, y/n. Is. This. For. Me?”

“Yes! Yes, Daddy, it’s all for you, only for you. Nobody else, God, please just touch me!” You whine, chest heaving with the intensity of your need for him. Danny takes pity on you, shushing your cries with a kiss and making you jump when you feel the pad of his thumb circling your puffy clit once, twice, three times. You keen, moaning into his mouth and grasping onto his shoulders as you grind yourself onto his hand. Every time Danny touches you is like a fever; you feel fire spreading through your body and reach a peak wherever his touch meets your skin. Even if you knew it meant being burned alive, you wanted to bask in that fire, that heat, for the rest of your life.

“Okay, honey girl, okay,” Danny shushes, once again trailing his lips down your neck, your sternum, your belly, and settling onto his knees in front of you. “You’ve been so good, baby. So good. Daddy’s gonna give his honey girl what she deserves.”

You could cry with relief when you feel the tip of his tongue meet your swollen clit, burying your hands into his hair not so gently this time and grinding yourself onto his face. He gives you the softest kitten licks before traveling down to push his tongue towards your entrance, effectively fucking you with the heavenly muscle before travelling back up to your clit. Danny resurfaces only to talk to you in the way that he knows you adore, the way that only he can, pushing one thick finger into you as he does. “That’s it, y/n, use my mouth. Daddy told you he would give you what you want, but my dirty girl is so determined to take it herself. Jesus, fuck, honey, you’re so fuckin’ tight. You ready for another?”

You nod your head rapidly, still bucking your hips to ride his hand. “Shit, Danny, baby, I’m so close, can I come? Please, daddy, I’ve been your good girl, please make me come-” you cut yourself off as you feel a tear slip down your cheek. Your body feels like it’s on fire and that knot inside your belly is dangerously close to snapping. You do your best to hold yourself together, especially as Danny slips another finger into you and curls them just right to hit that spot within your body that nobody, no previous partners nor even yourself, could seem to find. Danny found it within minutes of your first time together, and has never failed to make you see stars by hitting it each time since.

“Give it to me, honey girl,” your drummer says, adding that sinful tongue of his to the wildfire that is between your thighs. “Come on my tongue.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. With a strangled cry of “oh, fuuuuck, Daniel.” your high came crashing over you in a tidal wave, the current of it pulling you under again and again as Danny licked you through it.

When you finally pulled yourself out of your orgasmic haze, Danny was stroking his own cock furiously. You had no energy to protest and watched, chest heaving, as he came by his own hand, his head thrown back and a soft “fuck,” leaving his lips.

Standing, your drummer cleans first himself off with the used towel, then walks to the linen closet and picks out a clean washcloth, running it under warm water and cleaning between your legs as well. You stick your bottom lip out when he pecks you on the nose, pouting.

“What’s wrong, honey girl?” Danny asks with his eyebrows furrowed.

You kiss the palm of his hand as it cups your cheek. “Why didn’t you let me help you come, too? I wanted to make you feel good, baby.” You chew on the inside of your cheek, the guilt at being so wrapped up in your own pleasure you failed to make your sweet boyfriend feel the same way eating at you.

Danny placed a soft kiss on your forehead, scooping you into his arms and carrying you into your shared bedroom. He placed you on your feet, making sure your legs were steady, before padding to the dresser to get pajamas out for the both of you. “Tonight was supposed to be about you, y/n,” he assures you, slipping his Church of Rock and Roll t-shirt over your head and navigating your arms through the sleeves. “You always work so hard during the first week to make sure your classroom is perfect for your students, and I wanted to take care of you tonight. You deserve to see stars after all you do.”

He moves to put on his own pjs after aiding you into stepping into your underwear and sleep shorts, sliding on a pair of threadbare plaid pants and his well-loved Howling Wolf cutoff shirt. Snuggling yourselves into bed, you lay your head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat for several minutes, matching your breaths to his own.

“Thank you, honey boy,” you whisper into the dark. “I love you.”

“I love you too, honey girl,” comes his reply. “You’re worth hanging the fuckin’ moon for.”

Giggling, you almost drift off into slumber when you hear Danny’s voice once again. “By the way, I convinced the guys to help with your room tomorrow. I’m not sure whether to say you’re welcome or I’m sorry yet.”

Suddenly, you can’t wait for tomorrow.

[julia-lestrade]

60s!Paul McCartney x reader

Tunes and Timeless Moments

Authors note : this is a SMUT FREE 60s high school au where the band will exist but it plays before " The Beatles " fanfic

Slow burn and fluff

Warnings : tooth rotting fluff , romance , teen romance , and some use of Y/N

——————————————————————

It was a nice summer day in Liverpool and your class and other people from your grade were getting settled in a school bus as you were about to go on a 4 week field trip , because of a shortage of teachers , so your school has to make time to find new ones . And even though it was a bit full when you and your friends were boarding the coach you still found three free rows and you got one to yourself right next to a window without any things to block it . Now you were chatting with your friend a row ahead when a boy from your class slid into the last empty seat next to you. He flashed a casual grin and said, “Seems like I’ve nabbed the final seat. Hope you don’t mind the company—uhm what is your name again ? “ you look at the boy a bit weirded out , because who Tf speaks to someone they don’t really know , right ? But to be polite you have him a light smile and stretched out your hand to and introduced yourself to him . " y/n – l/n y/n pleasure to meet you ! " the boy just smiles at you and shakes your hand and after a while you start to pull away and ask him for his name wich he finally shares with you … he was called Paul McCartney and then it clicked , he was the music obsessed boy you sat behind of in math class .

(Ugh you know what imma switch to first person perspective)

We both had made small talk from time to time in between school hours or had greeted each other in the school hallway but there was nothing more of any interaction than those . So as one figured after a bit of small talk, the conversation naturally fizzled out. You exchanged names and brief introductions, but now there was an awkward silence. You glanced out the window, watching the few teachers coming with you loading the bus with the bus driver , while he fiddled with his bags straps .

After some time the silence became insufferable and you had to start talking again .

“So, are you excited about the trip ? “ Paul looks up at you and replies with a relieved sigh

“Yeah, sounds interesting enough. I’m just hoping it’s not another one of those places where you’re not allowed to do anything but for things that have educational purposes .”

With slight intrigues I reply to him “Oh, I know what you mean. I find it super annoying . What’s the most trouble you’ve ever gotten into on a trip?”

Paul thinks for a Minute and then replies a few seconds later with a smile playing on his lips “Well, there was that time I tried to ‘borrow’ a statue’s hat at the last museum visit. Turns out, it wasn’t a prop. How about you?”

“I once got stuck in a gift shop because I was trying to sneak a peek at the secret stockroom. Got caught by the shopkeeper. Classic.”

“Sounds like we’re both experts in getting into mischief. Maybe we should stick together today. We could be a team of troublemakers.”

“Deal. Just promise you won’t get us thrown out.”

“No promises. But I’ll try my best. So, what’s your favorite part of these trips?”

“Probably the bus rides. It’s the only time we get to just talk and hang out without worrying about homework.”

“I’m with you there. The bus ride’s the best part. And who knows, maybe we’ll come up with a new adventure story by the end of the day.”

I nodded, trying to ignore the butterflies that were suddenly making themselves at home in my stomach. There was something about the way Paul spoke, so effortlessly casual yet with a glint of mischief behind every word. I hadn’t thought much about him before, but sitting next to him now, I couldn’t help but be intrigued.

“So, do you play any instruments?” I asked, half expecting a standard reply. It was a question that usually led to a predictable conversation, which, given the awkwardness earlier, felt like a safe bet.

He raised an eyebrow, a small smirk playing on his lips. “Funny you ask. I’ve been known to mess around with a bass now and then. You?”

“Mess around?” I echoed, laughing lightly. “That’s not very convincing. And no, I’m more of a listener, to be honest. Though I do own a dusty piano .”

“Ah, a listener. Even better. Musicians need an audience, after all,” he teased, tapping his fingers on the armrest as if playing an invisible rhythm.

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Are you trying to recruit me as your personal fan?”

“Well, it wouldn’t hurt to have someone in the crowd rooting for me,” he joked, but there was a flicker of something sincere in his eyes.

“Are you any good?” I asked, feeling the conversation loosening up as we both settled into the bus seats. The awkwardness from before had faded, replaced by a lightness that I hadn’t expected.

Paul shrugged modestly. “I suppose you’ll have to find out one day, won’t you?”

“Maybe I will,” I replied, half-smiling. There was a pause as I glanced out the window again. The teachers had finished loading the bags, and the bus was finally starting to pull away from the school. The familiar streets of Liverpool blurred past, but I could already feel the sense of freedom that came with leaving it all behind for a while.

Paul leaned back in his seat, stretching his legs out in front of him as much as the cramped bus would allow. “Four weeks, huh? Hard to believe we’re getting out of school for that long.”

“Yeah,” I agreed. “It’s weird, but kind of exciting. No classes, no homework... just us and a bunch of museums and... whatever else they’ve got planned.”

“Sounds like trouble waiting to happen,” he mused with a grin, then turned to me with a curious look. “So, what do you reckon we’ll do with all that free time?”

I shrugged, thinking it over. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to see where the trip takes us. Maybe we’ll be well-behaved and stick to the itinerary, or maybe we’ll end up sneaking off and finding our own adventures.”

“Now you’re talking,” he said, his grin widening. “I like the sound of that. Let’s make a pact, yeah? No matter what, we find a way to have some fun on this trip. Deal?”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Deal.”

We shook on it, and for the first time since he sat down next to me, the silence that followed felt comfortable. The kind of silence that didn’t need to be filled with words. I leaned back in my seat, feeling a little more at ease, and glanced over at him. He was staring out the window now, lost in thought, his fingers

The hours passed as the bus hummed along the winding roads out of Liverpool, and the initial excitement of the trip settled into a comfortable lull. Most of our classmates were either dozing off, flipping through magazines, or talking quietly among themselves. Paul had gone quiet beside me, staring out the window again with that distant look on his face. I wondered if he was thinking about his band or maybe even some new lyrics.

Eventually, he broke the silence. “You ever been away from home this long?”

I shook my head. “Not really. I mean, I’ve gone on a few trips with my family, but never for four weeks. Feels a bit strange, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he agreed, stretching his legs out as far as they could go in the cramped space. “Not that I’m complaining, though. Gets me out of school for a bit. Gives me time to work on some songs without all the usual distractions.”

I turned toward him, curious. “What kind of songs are you working on?”

He smiled, but there was something almost shy about it this time. “Just, you know, stuff about life, love, that sort of thing. Trying to find a sound that feels right.”

“Sounds deep,” I teased lightly, though I was genuinely interested. “Think you’ll play any of them on this trip?”

Paul chuckled. “Not sure how well that’d go over with the teachers. But maybe if I can sneak my guitar along, we’ll see.”

“Hey, you’ve got four weeks to work your magic. You could start a bus sing-along or something,” I joked, imagining how chaotic that would get.

“Now that would be a sight,” he laughed. “Though I’m not sure everyone here’s ready for that. You might be the only one who appreciates my questionable taste in music.”

I smirked. “Questionable, huh? Now I’m curious what kind of tunes you’re into.”

He thought for a moment, tapping his fingers on the seat again, before grinning. “Tell you what, I’ll give you a taste later. But you’ve got to promise to be brutally honest—none of that polite nodding if you think it’s rubbish.”

“Deal,” I said, feeling a bit of excitement bubbling up. It wasn’t every day you got the chance to hear original music from a classmate who just might be the next big thing.

The bus hit another bump, jolting us both slightly, and Paul shifted in his seat, his expression turning a bit more mischievous . “You know, this trip could be a real chance to get away from all that usual school stuff—figure out what we’re actually good at, you know?”

I nodded, understanding what he meant. “Yeah, it’s nice to get a break from the usual routine. It feels like everything’s always about exams and homework, and you never really get time to think about what you actually want to do.”

He looked at me, his gaze steady. “Exactly. Feels like we’re just going through the motions most of the time. Maybe this trip’s the chance to shake things up a bit.”

We shared a moment of quiet understanding. It was strange to think that this boy I’d barely talked to before today was someone who seemed to get it—the feeling of wanting more than just the typical school routine, of wanting to do something that mattered.

After a moment, Paul’s easy grin returned, and he tilted his head toward the front of the bus. “Think we’ll make it through this trip without any major disasters?”

I laughed. “Not a chance. But hey, at least we’ll have some good stories to tell when we get back.”

He chuckled, leaning back in his seat again. “That’s the spirit. Let’s make sure they’re worth telling.”

With that, the conversation fell into a more comfortable silence. The miles stretched out ahead of us, and I found myself looking forward to whatever came next. Maybe this trip would be more than just a break from school. Maybe it would be the start of something… interesting.

As I glanced over at Paul, who was now lost in his thoughts again, I couldn’t help but feel that this was just the beginning of whatever adventure we were about to stumble into.

The bus continued to hum along the road, and after what felt like an eternity of winding through the countryside, I noticed Paul had gone quiet again. He was still beside me, lost in thought, staring out the window at the rolling hills. The earlier ease between us had settled into something quieter, something a little more comfortable but still new.

I shifted in my seat, feeling the stiffness in my legs from sitting for so long. Paul must have noticed because he turned to me with a small smile. “Long ride, huh?”

“Yeah,” I agreed. “My legs are starting to feel like they’re turning into jelly.”

He chuckled softly. “Maybe we should’ve brought a guitar or something. Could’ve passed the time with a sing-along.”

I smiled at that. “And what would you have played? Something we all know, or one of your originals?”

Paul shrugged, that same casual smirk playing on his lips. “Depends. I might’ve tested out a new tune if I felt like the crowd was up for it.”

I raised an eyebrow. “New tune? So, you’ve got some secret songs you’re hiding from us?”

“Not exactly,” he said, leaning back in his seat. “Just a few ideas, you know? Scribbles in a notebook, half-finished lyrics… nothing special.”

I laughed softly. “I doubt that. You seem like the kind of person who’s always working on something creative.”

Paul looked at me, a little surprised by the compliment. “Maybe. It’s just… you never know when something’s going to stick. Sometimes, you’re just playing around, and then all of a sudden, it turns into something real.”

I nodded, feeling a bit of admiration for him that I hadn’t expected. “I guess that’s the exciting part, right? Not knowing what’s going to come out of it?”

“Exactly,” he said, his eyes lighting up a bit. “That’s what keeps it interesting.”

We fell into another comfortable silence, and this time it didn’t feel awkward at all. Instead, it felt like we were both content to let the conversation come and go as it pleased. Maybe this trip wouldn’t be so bad after all.

I glanced over at Paul, feeling the conversation drifting into silence again, and decided to ask something that had been on my mind. “So… do you play in a band or anything? You mentioned the bass earlier.”

He looked a little surprised at the question, then smiled, a hint of something more serious in his expression. “Yeah, actually. A few of us have been messing around with the idea. It’s nothing big yet, just playing a few tunes in garages or wherever we can.”

I tilted my head, intrigued. “That sounds pretty cool. How’d you get into it?”

Paul shrugged, a bit more relaxed now. “I’ve always loved music, ever since I was a kid. My dad plays piano, and I just sort of… picked things up. Then, once I got my hands on a guitar, there was no going back.”

“That’s impressive,” I said, genuinely meaning it. “I always thought about learning an instrument, but I never really got past a few half-hearted piano lessons.”

He chuckled. “Piano’s not a bad place to start. But you know, it’s never too late to try something new. Could always join us for a jam session.”

“Me?” I laughed, shaking my head. “I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“Hey, everyone’s got to start somewhere,” Paul said with a grin. “Besides, it’s more about having fun than being perfect.”

I smiled at that, appreciating his easygoing attitude. “I’ll keep that in mind. Maybe I’ll surprise you one day and show up with a tambourine or something.”

He laughed, the sound light and easy. “Now that would be something. We could always use more percussion.”

Paul’s laughter lingered for a moment, and I couldn’t help but smile, feeling a bit more comfortable now. The awkwardness had melted away, replaced by a casual warmth between us.

“So,” I said, glancing out the window at the countryside rolling by, “what kind of music do you guys play? Is it, like, rock and roll?”

He nodded, his eyes lighting up with excitement. “Yeah, that’s the idea. Rock and roll, a bit of skiffle—stuff that makes you want to move, you know? We’re still figuring it out, but we’ve been covering a lot of Chuck Berry, Little Richard… those kinds of tunes.”

“Chuck Berry, huh?” I raised an eyebrow. “That’s some serious stuff. You must be pretty good.”

Paul shrugged modestly, though there was a hint of pride in his voice. “We’re getting there. It’s all about practice. But it’s not just about being good—it’s about having fun with it, and seeing where it takes us.”

I nodded, impressed. “That sounds amazing. I don’t know many people who actually follow through on something like that.”

“Well,” he said with a grin, “we’ll see if we can make something of it. For now, it’s just nice to have an excuse to hang out with the lads and make some noise.”

“Do you have a name for the band yet?” I asked, leaning into the conversation now, genuinely curious.

Paul laughed, shaking his head. “Not yet. We’ve been throwing around ideas, but nothing’s stuck so far. Naming a band’s harder than you’d think. It’s got to feel right, you know?”

I smiled at that. “Yeah, I can imagine. It’s like naming a baby or something—it’s got to fit.”

“Exactly!” He pointed at me, nodding. “We don’t want to pick something we’ll regret later on.”

“Well, if you need any suggestions, I’m here to help,” I said playfully.

Paul chuckled. “I might just take you up on that.”

We fell into a more comfortable silence after that, but this time it didn’t feel awkward. Instead, it felt like the start of something new, like this conversation was the first step toward an unexpected friendship. The bus continued to rumble along the road, and I leaned back in my seat, feeling lighter than I had at the beginning of the trip.

As the scenery blurred by outside, Paul tapped his fingers on his knee, lost in thought. “You know,” he said after a moment, “I think this trip could be a good time to work on some new songs. Get some fresh ideas.”

“Yeah?” I asked, intrigued. “What inspires you when you write?”

He tilted his head, considering. “Anything, really. A bit of life, love, people I meet… sometimes it’s just a feeling that comes out of nowhere. You never know when inspiration will hit, so you’ve got to be ready.”

“That’s pretty deep,” I said, half-teasing but also impressed. “I guess I never really thought about songwriting like that.”

Paul smiled at me, his eyes softening. “It’s not as complicated as it sounds. You just… write what you feel, you know? Maybe one day you’ll give it a try.”

“Maybe,” I said, though I wasn’t sure if I had that kind of talent. Still, the idea of trying something new, of exploring creativity, sounded appealing.

The bus hit a small bump, jostling us both in our seats, and we shared a brief laugh at the unexpected jolt. The conversation started to drift again, but this time, it felt natural. We didn’t need to fill the silence with forced words. The bus continued on, carrying us toward whatever adventures lay ahead.

I couldn’t help but wonder what the next few weeks would bring, and whether this unexpected connection with Paul would turn into something more than just a fleeting conversation on a school bus.

After we all gathered our bags, the teachers started dividing us into our assigned rooms. The sun was nearly set by now, casting a soft orange glow through the windows of the old estate. The long day of travel had caught up with everyone, and the buzz of excitement had faded into tired chatter.

"Y/N, Room 12," one of the teachers called, ticking off names on a clipboard. I nodded, tightening my grip on my bag and heading inside the building. Paul was still beside me, waiting to hear his own room assignment.

"McCartney, Room 9," another teacher announced, and Paul raised his hand with a small grin.

“Looks like we’re not too far from each other,” he said, adjusting his bag over his shoulder. “Not bad.”

I smiled back. “Yeah, close enough to find each other if we need to plot any late-night escapes.”

Paul laughed lightly. “You never know. But for tonight, I think I’m just going to crash. Too knackered for any adventures.”

"Same here," I agreed, stifling a yawn. The thought of a bed sounded incredibly appealing after a long day cooped up on the bus.

We both followed the hallway until it split off into different sections. My room was down one corridor, and his was down another. Paul turned to face me as we reached the split, flashing a tired but sincere smile.

“Well, goodnight then,” he said softly. “See you tomorrow?”

“Definitely,” I replied. “Goodnight, Paul. Sleep well.”

“You too,” he said with a small wave before turning and walking off toward his room.

I headed to my own room, pushing open the door to find it was already half-occupied by another girl from my grade. She looked just as exhausted as I felt, already halfway through unpacking her things onto her bed. We exchanged tired smiles and quick introductions before both agreeing to call it a night and save any further conversation for tomorrow.

After a quick change into my pajamas, I climbed into bed, the weight of the day finally settling over me. I could hear faint murmurs of conversation through the thin walls, including what might have been Paul's voice from down the hall. But soon, even that faded as the building grew quiet, and sleep started to pull me under. The last thought I had before drifting off was that this trip was just beginning, and I had a feeling there was much more to come—especially when it came to Paul.

-Paul’s POV -

Paul flopped onto his bed with a contented sigh, letting his tired limbs sink into the surprisingly soft mattress. The room was modest but comfortable, with a pair of neatly made beds, a small dresser, and a window that let in a sliver of the moonlight.

George, who was sprawled on his own bed across the room, looked up from fiddling with his guitar case. “So, how’s your day been, mate?” he asked, his voice carrying a mix of curiosity and exhaustion.

Paul grinned, propping himself up on one elbow. “Not too bad. Got to know someone from our class a bit better. You know, Y/N? They ended up sitting next to me on the bus.”

George raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued. “Oh, really? And how’d that go?”

“Pretty well, actually,” Paul said, shrugging. “We talked about the trip, a bit about music. Seems like a decent sort. We’re both in for some fun, I reckon.”

George smirked. “And here I thought you’d be too busy plotting your next great escape to talk to anyone.”

Paul chuckled. “Hey, a little adventure is always better with company, right? Besides, I didn’t exactly get any time to plot today. The bus ride was more about trying not to fall asleep and making sure I didn’t annoy everyone around me.”

George laughed, the sound echoing slightly in the small room. “Fair enough. And what did you think of the place so far? Not too shabby, huh?”

“Yeah, it’s got its charm,” Paul said, glancing around the room. “Bit different from the usual. Feels like we’re really on a proper adventure now. I mean, four weeks in this old place? It’s bound to be interesting.”

George nodded, strumming a few chords on his guitar absentmindedly. “Sounds like it’ll be a good time. And you know what they say—new experiences are always worth a shot.”

“Exactly,” Paul agreed, sitting up and stretching. “It’ll be nice to get away from the usual grind. Plus, we’ll have plenty of time to mess about, come up with new tunes, and maybe even make some new friends.”

George glanced over, his expression thoughtful. “You’ve got that right. And with this lot, who knows what kind of trouble we’ll get up to.”

Paul grinned, feeling a surge of excitement. “Trouble, new friends, and maybe even some inspiration for new songs. Sounds like a good plan to me.”

As the conversation continued, the two friends talked about their plans for the upcoming weeks, sharing their hopes and expectations. The room was filled with a relaxed, easy camaraderie that only grew stronger with the passing minutes. It was a quiet, comfortable end to a long day, and as Paul finally settled into his bed, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this trip might just be the beginning of something extraordinary.

“Well, time for some shut-eye,” Paul said, stifling a yawn. “Big day ahead tomorrow.”

George nodded in agreement, his guitar case now closed and resting by his bed. “Goodnight, Paul. See you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, George,” Paul replied, turning off the bedside lamp and letting the darkness envelop the room. As he drifted off to sleep, his thoughts wandered back to Y/N and the promise of the adventures that lay ahead.

As George’s breathing settled into a rhythmic, steady pattern, Paul lay awake in the darkness, staring up at the ceiling. His mind was a whirl of thoughts and images from the day.

He couldn’t help but replay the moments he’d shared with Y/N. Her easy smile and quick wit had made a strong impression on him. He found himself wondering what it would be like to spend more time with her, to see where their conversations could lead. There was something undeniably engaging about her—a spark of curiosity and a willingness to engage in lighthearted banter that had struck a chord with him.

Paul thought about the little details of their interaction: how she had seemed genuinely interested when he mentioned his band and how she had laughed at his jokes. The thought of her intrigued him more than he expected. He recalled the way she looked when she mentioned her dusty piano, her eyes lighting up just a bit. He wondered if she might be someone who could appreciate the kind of music he was passionate about, someone who might even share some of his own interests.

He shifted slightly in his bed, trying to get comfortable as he continued to muse over the potential for new friendships and adventures. The trip was supposed to be a break from the usual grind, but Paul was beginning to see it as a chance to explore not just new places, but new relationships and possibilities.

As the minutes ticked by, Paul’s thoughts wandered to what the next few weeks might hold. Would he and Y/N find themselves paired up for group activities, or would they stumble upon shared interests that brought them closer? He imagined showing her his guitar, maybe even playing a few of his songs, and wondered if she would be interested in hearing them.

There was a small thrill in the uncertainty of it all—the sense of adventure that came with not knowing exactly what was around the corner. Paul felt a mix of excitement and nervous anticipation. The future was full of potential, and he was eager to see where it would lead.

-Time skip to the next morning -

(Still Paul’s pov)

Eventually, the gentle hum of the night and the comfortable rhythm of his own thoughts began to lull him into sleep. Paul’s mind settled on the possibilities that lay ahead, the idea of new friendships, and the hope that this trip would bring some unexpected but welcome surprises.

Paul settled at the breakfast table with his friends and bandmates, John, George, and Ringo. The morning sun filtered through the dining room windows, casting a warm glow on the old wooden tables. The room buzzed with the chatter of students excitedly discussing the day’s activities. Paul, however, found himself somewhat distracted.

As his friends debated over the itinerary for the day, Paul’s gaze kept drifting toward Y/N’s table. She was laughing at something her friends had said, her laughter a pleasant melody that seemed to stand out against the background noise. Paul tried to focus on the conversation at his table, but he couldn’t help but glance over every so often.

John, ever perceptive, noticed Paul’s wandering attention. With a smirk playing on his lips, he leaned closer to Paul and nudged him with an elbow. “Oi, Paul, what’s caught your eye?”

Paul snapped out of his daydream, his face warming as he realized he had been caught. He looked at John with a sheepish grin. “Oh, nothing much. Just... taking in the morning.”

John raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “Right. It seems like you’ve got a special interest in Y/N this morning. Didn’t know you were so keen on the company.”

Paul tried to brush it off, though he could feel himself blushing. “I was just thinking about how the trip might turn out. It’s nice to have some company, that’s all.”

John’s grin widened, clearly enjoying the teasing. “Well, if you’re thinking of making a move, you might want to be subtle about it. Can’t have you making a fool of yourself right out of the gate.”

Ringo, who had been listening with amusement, chimed in. “Looks like Paul’s got himself a bit of a crush. We’ll have to keep an eye on him.”

Paul chuckled nervously, trying to regain his composure. “It’s not like that. Just trying to figure out how we might end up interacting more. Could be interesting, you know?”

George, sensing Paul’s discomfort, gave him a supportive nudge. “Don’t worry about it too much. We’re all here to have a good time. If you end up talking to Y/N more, that’s just part of the adventure.”

As breakfast wound down, the group’s attention shifted to the plans for the day. Paul couldn’t shake the feeling of excitement mingled with nerves. He stole one last glance at Y/N, who was now chatting animatedly with her friends. Despite the teasing from his bandmates, Paul felt a genuine eagerness to get to know her better.

The transition from breakfast to the first activity of the day was quick. The group gathered their things and made their way to the bus, ready for the day’s adventures. Paul joined his friends, the teasing continuing in good spirits, but his mind kept drifting back to the promise of new experiences and the possibility of spending more time with Y/N.

As the bus pulled away from the accommodation, the landscape of the small town began to unfold before them. The anticipation of the day ahead mingled with Paul’s curiosity about Y/N, making the journey feel both exciting and full of potential.

The bus pulled up to the Natural History Museum, and the students began to disembark with excited chatter. The grand facade of the museum loomed ahead, its imposing columns and intricate stonework hinting at the treasures inside. As the group gathered in front of the entrance, the teachers began organizing everyone into pairs for the day’s exploration.

Paul and Y/N had been mingling with their friends, chatting about the exhibits they hoped to see, when one of the teachers called out. “Alright, everyone, we’re going to pair up for the museum tour. Make sure you’re with someone you can work well with!”

Paul glanced over at Y/N, who was also scanning the crowd, likely looking for a familiar face. Just as he was about to suggest they stick together, the teacher’s voice rang out again. “Paul McCartney and Y/N L/N, you’re a pair for the day. Find a partner and get started on the tour!”

Paul’s heart skipped a beat as he turned to Y/N, who looked pleasantly surprised. “Looks like we’re teamed up,” he said with a grin.

Y/N returned the smile. “Guess we’re spending the day together. Ready for some museum exploration?”

Paul nodded enthusiastically. “Definitely. Let’s make the most of it.”

As they entered the museum, the grandeur of the exhibits immediately captured their attention. Fossils, minerals, and ancient artifacts filled the expansive halls, each display more intriguing than the last. The museum guide provided a brief overview of the day’s activities and handed out maps, urging everyone to start exploring.

Paul and Y/N made their way through the exhibits, their conversation flowing easily as they navigated the museum’s vast interior. The initial awkwardness from the bus seemed to have dissipated, replaced by a shared curiosity and enthusiasm for the exhibits. They wandered through the dinosaur gallery, marveled at the minerals on display, and even took turns trying to identify the various fossils.

At one point, they found themselves in front of a particularly impressive diorama featuring prehistoric mammals. Paul leaned closer, examining the display. “These creatures are incredible. Imagine what it must have been like when they roamed the Earth.”

Y/N nodded, her eyes wide with fascination. “It’s amazing to think about how different the world was back then. I’ve always found stuff like this so fascinating.”

Paul glanced at her, noting the genuine excitement in her expression. “You know, I’ve got a bit of a fascination with history myself. Not just the music stuff. There’s something about learning how the world used to be that’s really intriguing.”

Y/N smiled, clearly enjoying the conversation. “I can relate. It’s like stepping back in time and seeing things from a different perspective. Makes you appreciate how much things have changed.”

As they continued their tour, Paul found himself more and more comfortable around Y/N. Their conversation flowed effortlessly, punctuated by shared discoveries and laughter. It was clear that their time together was turning into something enjoyable and meaningful.

With each exhibit they explored, the day seemed to get better. The initial excitement of the field trip had settled into a genuine connection between the two of them. By the time they took a break in the museum’s café, Paul and Y/N were laughing and chatting like old friends.

“So,” Paul said, taking a sip of his drink, “how are you finding the museum so far?”

“It’s been fantastic,” Y/N replied, her eyes sparkling. “I didn’t expect to enjoy it this much, but having a good tour guide and a great partner definitely makes a difference.”

Paul grinned. “I’d say we make a pretty good team. Here’s to more adventures.”

Y/N raised her cup in a mock toast. “Cheers to that.”

As they finished their break and headed back to explore the remaining exhibits, Paul couldn’t help but feel that the day was turning out better than he’d imagined. Spending time with Y/N had been unexpectedly enjoyable, and he was looking forward to what the rest of the field trip would bring.

-Y/Ns POV -

As Paul and I finished our break in the café, we headed toward the museum’s next big attraction: the Butterfly House. The sun streamed through the glass ceiling, creating a warm, almost magical atmosphere. The Butterfly House was a lush, green paradise filled with colorful flowers and fluttering butterflies of every shade imaginable.

“Wow, this place is incredible,” I said, looking around at the vibrant display of nature.

Paul grinned, clearly just as taken with the exhibit. “It’s like stepping into a different world, isn’t it? All these butterflies—such a riot of colors.”

We walked along the winding path through the Butterfly House, surrounded by the gentle hum of butterflies flitting about. The air was filled with the sweet scent of blooming flowers, and the soft rustle of the leaves added to the serene ambiance.

I watched as a particularly large butterfly landed on a nearby flower. “Look at that one—it’s huge! I’ve never seen one like it before.”

Paul leaned closer, squinting at the butterfly. “That’s a Swallowtail, I think. They’re pretty common, but they’re always impressive to see up close.”

We continued down the path, pausing occasionally to admire the butterflies landing on the flowers and even a few that landed on our shoulders or arms. It felt like a gentle, almost playful interaction with nature.

“So,” Paul said, breaking the pleasant silence, “what do you think of all this? It’s pretty amazing, right?”

“I love it,” I replied, smiling at the sight of a butterfly landing gently on my hand. “It’s so peaceful and beautiful. I never expected to enjoy it this much.”

Paul chuckled, clearly enjoying the moment. “I’m glad we’re having a good time. It’s nice to just take a break from the usual routine and soak in something like this.”

We continued walking, enjoying the beauty around us. Paul’s easy demeanor and the relaxed environment made for a perfect combination, and I found myself feeling more at ease with each passing moment.

After spending some time in the Butterfly House, we decided to explore the museum’s main exhibition hall. The hall was grand and filled with a diverse range of exhibits, from ancient artifacts to natural history displays.

As we moved through the various exhibits, Paul pointed out interesting facts and shared his own observations, making the experience more engaging. We found ourselves getting lost in conversations about everything from historical events to the mysteries of the natural world.

“This place is a treasure trove of information,” I said, looking around at the impressive displays. “There’s so much to take in.”

Paul nodded, his enthusiasm evident. “It really is. I could spend all day here just exploring and learning new things.”

We spent hours wandering through the exhibits, and as the day went on, I felt a growing sense of camaraderie with Paul. Our shared curiosity and enthusiasm made for great company, and I was genuinely enjoying our time together.

As we made our way back to the entrance, Paul looked over at me with a smile. “So, how do you feel about the day so far?”

“It’s been fantastic,” I said, returning his smile. “I didn’t expect to have such a great time. Thanks for making it so enjoyable.”

Paul’s eyes sparkled with a mix of gratitude and amusement. “Glad to hear that. It’s been a pleasure exploring with you.”

We walked out of the museum together, the sun beginning to set and casting a warm glow over the city. The day had been filled with discovery and laughter, and I found myself looking forward to more moments like this as the field trip continued.

As Paul and I made our way back to the bus after a full day at the museum, we decided to take one last stroll around the museum grounds. We came across a small garden area that had been carefully maintained and was home to a variety of plants and, of course, more butterflies.

I stopped to admire a particularly vibrant flower bed, and Paul followed my gaze. “Look at that—more butterflies. They really seem to love this place.”

I chuckled and pointed to a patch of bugs crawling on the leaves. “You know, seeing all these bugs makes me think of something ridiculous.”

Paul raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “Oh? What’s that?”

“Well,” I began with a grin, “I couldn’t help but notice that some of these little guys look like they’re having a bit of a band meeting. If I had to name a band after these bugs, I’d call them ‘The Beetles.’”

Paul blinked, then burst into laughter. “The Beetles? That’s brilliant! They’d definitely have a unique sound—imagine their hit single, ‘I Want to Hold Your Beetle.’”

I laughed along with him, enjoying the playful banter. “Exactly! And their debut album could be ‘With a Little Help from My Bugs.’”

Paul wiped a tear from his eye, still chuckling. “You’ve got a real knack for coming up with names. I’m impressed.”

“Well,” I said, “if you ever need a band name or a joke for your future concerts, you know where to find me.”

We continued our walk, still laughing about the joke. The sun was setting, casting a warm golden hue over the museum grounds. As we approached the bus, Paul looked at me with a thoughtful expression.

“You know,” he said, “that’s actually not a bad idea. I think ‘The Beetles’ could work—if only there were enough bugs to fill out the band.”

“Hey, you never know,” I said with a wink. “Maybe we’ll discover a whole new world of insect rock stars.”

We boarded the bus, the laughter from our earlier joke still lingering in the air. As we found our seats, Paul and I exchanged smiles, feeling a new level of camaraderie. It had been a day full of discoveries and laughter, and I couldn’t wait to see what other adventures awaited us on this field trip.

As we settled back into our seats on the bus, the remnants of our laughter still lingering, I couldn’t help but continue with the playful theme. “You know,” I said with a mischievous grin, “if you’re serious about naming a band after these bugs, maybe you should tweak the name a bit.”

Paul raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. “Oh? What do you have in mind?”

“Well,” I began, “instead of ‘The Beetles,’ why not change it to ‘The Beatles’? It sounds a bit more... musical, don’t you think?”

Paul’s eyes widened in surprise as he processed the suggestion. “The Beatles? That’s actually quite clever. It’s got a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

“Exactly,” I said, pleased with his reaction. “And it’s got that whole play on words thing going on—‘beat’ as in rhythm and ‘beatle’ as in the bug. It’s perfect for a band.”

Paul chuckled, shaking his head in amazement. “You know, you might be onto something there. If I ever start a band, I might just have to use that name.”

I laughed. “Well, if that ever happens, I expect a backstage pass.”

Paul grinned. “Deal. And I’ll make sure to credit you for the name idea.”

As the bus began to pull away, taking us to our accommodations for the night, Paul and I continued chatting about music and our favorite bands. The playful banter had turned into a more engaging conversation, and I was enjoying every moment of it.

The name ‘The Beatles’ had become an inside joke between us, a reminder of a day filled with unexpected fun and connection. As we arrived at our lodgings and prepared for the evening, I couldn’t help but feel that this field trip was turning out to be far more interesting than I’d originally anticipated.

As the days rolled by on our field trip, what started as a casual acquaintance had evolved into something much more meaningful. By the time the final week arrived, Paul and I had settled into a comfortable rhythm, our conversations flowing effortlessly and our shared laughter becoming a staple of our daily interactions.

Our time exploring museums, historical sites, and even the occasional impromptu adventure had drawn us closer. We had spent countless hours together, whether it was discussing our favorite bands, trying to solve random trivia questions, or simply enjoying the quiet moments on the bus rides between destinations.

The final week of the trip arrived with a sense of bittersweet anticipation. On one hand, we were looking forward to returning home and sharing our experiences with friends and family. On the other, it was hard to imagine not seeing Paul every day, not sharing those spontaneous jokes or planning our next playful escapade.

One evening, as we sat on a bench overlooking a scenic park near our lodgings, I turned to Paul, who was idly strumming on his guitar. The soft strains of his music blended with the tranquil surroundings, creating a serene atmosphere that seemed to echo the sentiment of our time together.

“Can you believe it’s almost over?” I asked, watching as the last rays of sunlight painted the sky in hues of orange and pink.

Paul glanced up, his expression thoughtful. “It’s gone by so quickly. Feels like just yesterday we were trying to come up with band names for a bunch of bugs.”

I laughed softly, the memory bringing a warm feeling. “Yeah, and who would have thought that joke would turn into one of our favorite inside jokes?”

Paul smiled, setting his guitar aside and turning to face me. “It’s been an amazing trip. I didn’t expect to make such a good friend, let alone someone I’d look forward to seeing every day.”

I met his gaze, feeling a flutter of emotion. “I know what you mean. This trip has been a lot more memorable because of you.”

We shared a comfortable silence, the evening air cool against our skin. The park was quiet except for the distant sounds of other tourists and the occasional rustle of leaves. It was a peaceful moment, one that seemed to encapsulate everything we had experienced together over the past few weeks.

As the sun set and the stars began to twinkle in the sky, I felt a sense of gratitude for the connection we had built. The upcoming departure felt like a poignant end to a chapter that had brought unexpected joy and companionship.

Paul’s voice broke the silence gently. “You know, even when this trip ends, I hope we stay in touch. It’s been really great getting to know you.”

I nodded, smiling warmly. “I’d like that too. It’s been an incredible journey, and I’m glad we’ve shared it.”

As we sat there, watching the stars emerge and the city lights begin to twinkle in the distance, I couldn’t help but feel that this final week had been the culmination of something truly special. It was the end of an adventure, but also the beginning of a new connection that I hoped would last long after the field trip was over.

The final days of our field trip flew by in a whirlwind of excitement and nostalgia. Before we knew it, the bus was pulling back into our school parking lot, and the familiar sights of our hometown began to come into view. As we disembarked and said our goodbyes to the teachers and other students, there was a palpable sense of both relief and sadness.

Paul and I lingered near the bus, our luggage in hand, as the excitement of returning home mingled with the wistfulness of leaving behind the memorable experiences we had shared. We chatted about our favorite moments and laughed over inside jokes from the trip, trying to hold onto the easy camaraderie we had built.

As the crowd began to thin and students reunited with their families, Paul glanced at me with a thoughtful expression. “Hey,” he began, scratching the back of his neck nervously, “there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

I looked at him, curiosity piqued. “Yeah? What’s up?”

Paul hesitated for a moment before taking a deep breath. “Well, we’ve spent a lot of time together over the past few weeks, and I’ve really enjoyed it. I was wondering if you’d like to go out with me sometime. Maybe catch a movie or just hang out, you know?”

I felt a surge of warmth at his words, a mixture of surprise and happiness. “Are you asking me out on a date?” I asked, trying to keep my tone light but unable to hide the excitement in my voice.

Paul’s cheeks flushed slightly, and he nodded, a hopeful smile on his lips. “Yeah, I guess I am. I’d really like to get to know you even better.”

I smiled back, feeling a flutter of excitement. “I’d like that too. It sounds like a lot of fun.”

Paul’s grin widened, and he let out a relieved laugh. “Great! I’ll figure out a time and place, and we can make plans. I promise not to drag you into any more bug-related band name discussions.”

I laughed, shaking my head. “I’ll hold you to that. But seriously, I’m looking forward to it.”

As we gathered our belongings and headed toward the school entrance, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of anticipation for what was to come. The field trip had been an unforgettable experience, and now, with this new chapter beginning, I was eager to see where it would lead. The prospect of spending more time with Paul, exploring our growing connection, and creating new memories made the end of the trip feel like a new beginning.

Authors note: I initially intended on making this a series but I wasn’t sure if anybody would read it so please tell me if you are interested!!!

[iamsonny-j]

This was originally going to be in reply to @glowinggreeneyes-e post about the Captain's education and career path...but then I got carried away because I'm so normal about this stuff so it's now its own post...with added angst because I have no control over any of this, my brain just goes.

So for a start the Captain would have gone to a public boarding school. I think it's worth pointing out that public schools and universities operated scholarships for students from less wealthy backgrounds. We're still talking middle class and upper middle, but not always full on wealthy and privileged in the way of someone like Julian. Cap strikes me as having the background of a family well enough off but he probably always had to work hard to prove himself for his place, maybe not so much for public school but definitely for university.

Whatever school he attended would have had an Officer Training Corps junior division. Basically cadets. This would lead to the possibility to do an exam (written and practical) to get what was called certificate A to show he had participated in the OTC.

From the Button House Archives it says Cap got to the front in WW1 at armistice and so never saw action. So I imagine he finished his studies at school in the summer, enlisted and completed basic training, and then was out to Europe just in time for things to end. Because he got his certificate A at school he had the option at university to join the OTC university division. This was a route to becoming a commissioned officer. You either needed certificate A or experience in the ranks to join. For the sake of argument, serving in the army for a couple of months wouldn't count as experience so he must have had the certificate A...

University options at that time were limited to Oxbridge, Durham or London. All of those had OTC. I think London can be ruled out...only because it was busy, loud and ugly, even then (sorry London friends!) and the Captain likes wildlife and the countryside and nature walks...I can't see him thriving in London.

Training with the OTC at university involved physical training, military strategy, history and law etc. The Captain would have had to complete 2 years training before he could have done exams for his Certificate B - practical and written. Passing the exams would have entitled him to a commission on graduation. Getting Certificate B wasn't common because of the amount of work involved and dedication required to be successful. It was hard!

Like I want to point out that to get that far would have required so much effort and dedication right from being a child. And this is where I will get sad and headcanon-y for a bit (let me have this one thing out of all this research!)

Bullying and abusive rituals were a big part of public school life at this time and any boy seen as even slightly different would have been targeted for sure, even by some of the teachers. So although Cap comes across as clever and capable at what he knows I think school would have been socially really freaking hard. For a child in that situation I could see the OTC being a respite and something the Captain would have found very comforting with the set rules, order and expectations and from there you can understand why career army would have been appealing...

And I think that's when things get a bit complicated. The army was his life but in a different way to officers who wanted to be on the front line, like Havers. Obviously Cap worked extremely hard for his commission - and he was obviously very well qualified and knowledgable in his areas of interest, but he was always ever going to be best at HQ tasks like intelligence or engineering or whatever his particular career skills were - loving the army in theory, but some of it would have always been out of his reach. And I think being in a public school during WW1 and hearing of so many former pupils (some he would have known personally as seniors, prefects or head of houses) losing their lives on a daily basis during WW1 would have had a huge effect on him and probably influenced some of the guilt about not having the opportunity to fight himself, but ultimately I think he probably knew that wasn't his part to play even with WW2.

And I think all that that shows in his interactions we see in his past as CO - he was obviously doing a good job at whatever secret little operations he had but he really didn't have the skills/personality needed to be a CO. Having someone like Havers as a second hid that (and that's also seen in Havers getting 2 promotions in 4 years...he was much more of a natural CO) and I wonder if a lot of affection that Cap had for Havers originally came from the fact that Havers not only respected him as CO but he was also just kind to him and saw a person worthy of affection - rather than the CO that everyone tolerated but secretly disrespected and laughed at (just look at how all the other officers couldn't wait to come down on him in 5.05)

And then he lost Havers. But still had to command up to 150 men and operations at Button House for the next 4 years. And it's obvious from the letters and information in the Button House Archives that he really REALLY did try and I think with considering everything it's no wonder he overcompensates a lot and that's where he's at in the first couple of seasons of Ghosts; fighting for authority and trying to do his best.

Last sad point because it does relate: When he died Havers gave Cap the swagger stick to hold - Havers still called him 'Sir' even though he outranked him at that point. I don't know if I can begin to unpick all of that, but there's definitely something in there about respect, belief and the burden of responsibility that he clearly took seriously into his afterlife not wanting to let Havers down both personally and professionally.

If you read all of this I love you and respect you and appreciate you for appreciating my level of not normal xD

[suzuran777]

Review: Haiiro no Arcadia (Peaky)

It has been a while since I’ve played a new BLVN! And that’s mostly because we usually only get a few of them each year, so I’m happy that we’re getting multiple releases this year. Haiiro no Arcadia is a BLVN made by Peaky, a new visual novel company. When I first saw advertisements for this game I immediately got interested because I really love Mashima Shima’s art. The review will be spoiler free, so if you want to read a little bit about the game before playing it, go ahead!

The story is about protagonist Tamaki, who’s transferred to an all-boys boarding school. This school isn’t just any school and most of the students are children of elites, such as business leaders and managers of big companies. Located on top of a mountain surrounded by nature, it was built with the idea of creating an “ideal” studying environment for the students. Or so they say... After being there for a while, Tamaki notices there’s something strange about the school.

The school doesn’t allow students to have a cellphone or any form of entertainment, and going home, even during summer vacation, is prohibited. This means that the students have to stay there until they graduate (...or until they get kicked out). Tamaki was recommended to go to this school by his uncle, Sekai, who works at the school as a physician. Trusting his advice, Tamaki is excited to start his new life there.

This game has 3 main routes and one secret route I won’t say too much about, each character has a good and a bad end. As usual you can also get a bad end in the common route when you hang out with too many different characters. I’m not sure if there’s a guide yet but it was not super difficult to figure out how to get each ending. The recommended route order is Rio > Seri > Kouichi according to the official account, and I agree that it’s probably the best order to play in.

The first character our protagonist meets is Rio, who’s a second-year student and also in the same class as him. He’s also the student council president. After giving him a short tour of the dorm, they meet again at school the next day. This is where the game introduces the second love interest, a boy with a beautiful face called Seri. Tamaki thinks he’s a bit strange, but because they both like basketball, they get along. One day later while trying to find a classroom to hand in his homework, Tamaki stumbles upon a fight in the school’s garden and attempts to stop them. This is where he meets the third character who has his own route, Kouichi. He’s a third-year student with quite a bad reputation, as it seems like he’s often involved in fights. Other people warn Tamaki to not get too close to him, but Tamaki thinks Kouichi isn’t a bad person and wants to learn more about him.

Seri and Rio don’t really like each other because they have such different personalities, but still... hang out with each other for some reason lol? Even when Tamaki isn't there. Rio’s pretty serious and wants everyone to take their studies seriously, while Seri is carefree and sometimes doesn’t prioritize studying. Luckily for him though, Seri’s pretty smart so even with that attitude he seems to be doing fine. Both of them don't really interact with Kouichi because they're in a different class and don't really have a reason for talking to him, so they're surprised that Tamaki does talk to him.

Like mentioned in the short introduction, after a while Tamaki starts noticing some things about the school that seem weird and unnatural to him. One of the main themes that frequently returns in the story is that students suddenly become violent. According to the teachers, this is because of "stress" and the lack of distraction within the school, but even so, Tamaki wonders why such a thing is so normalized. He tries talking to Sekai about maybe improving the club activities and class schedules, but he isn't sure if he's taken seriously. It seems like nobody else is really concerned about these issues. At first Tamaki tries to ignore it and assumes the teachers are doing their bests, but later he realizes that something is seriously wrong with the school.

But I had a lot of fun playing this game! There wasn't a love interest I disliked. I must say that all of their personalities were... the complete opposite of what I expected, and I can't really mention details without spoiling lol, but it was interesting. It's always fun to play VNs in which you slowly unravel all kinds of secrets. I just wish there was more...!! Maybe they could continue it with a fandisc or drama CDs or something because I think there's definitely potential. Tamaki is such a cute protagonist I love him.

Impressions

Before the game's release, I was curious what kind of genre this game was. Of course it's a school setting game, but after watching the opening it looks like there's some darker themes as well. Without spoiling... I can definitely confirm that's true, though I wouldn't call it a horror game or anything! The bad endings do get really dark, especially Seri's ending kind of shocked me (in a good way because I like bad endings), so I definitely recommend that if you're looking for dark content! Some of the story in the main game gets quite dark as well (noncon scenes, some of the backstories etc.) so if you're sensitive to that, play with caution.

And by the way, according to Peaky's staff during one of the pre-release livestreams, they are currently working on a trial version, so if you're unsure if you want to buy the game or not, I recommend waiting a little bit longer until that's available! Picture below is from Mashima Shima's Twitter account, there's a lot of nice extra art there, so definitely check it out!

Hamashima Shima's account: X

Peaky Official Account: X

[whywoulditho]

the zionist lie: "muslims hate jews"

let's talk about it.

it's always baffling to talk to zionists because they are so confident when they tell you that muslims hate jews, that they've always hated jews, they teach their kids the same kind of hate they have and they want all the jews in the world dead. and when i, a muslim who was also born in a conservative muslim household and have gone to religious schools all throughout my teenage years, tell them that that's not true, they look at me like i'm insane.

the first time i heard about israel was in third grade, we were doing presentations on various world news and when i asked my mom about what the news about gaza were all about she explained to me that the israeli government was bombing them. i remember being so surprised because i had thought that bombs and wars were something of the past, that it was history. i felt sick, i was probably too young to learn about it. but i remember distinctly that the narrative was "israel is bombing palestine", not "jews are bombing muslims" i didn't even know that israelis were mostly jews and palestinians were mostly muslims. because either the news nor my mom painted "jews" as the villain. it was israel, a country, a state.

fast forward to middle school, sixth grade, last week of school before summer break. the teachers mostly leave us be because there's not much to learn anymore especially since our exams are already over. we asked this one math teacher to let us watch a movie and he said he had one in his usb driver, he put it on the board and we watched the boy with the striped pyjamas. that was the first time i ever learned about the holocaust, (for a little context, in turkey we learn WWI in much more detail than WWII since we only fought in the first one. especially in middle school level history, we don't get into the second one yet. that's why i hadn't heard of it before) and me and my friends bawled our eyes out to that movie. it was heartbreaking. we didn't understand how anyone could do such a thing.

i went back home and told my mom all about the movie and asked if she knew that jews had gone through such a thing. she explained the nazis and their concentration camps to me. i was shocked, i asked her how could that have ever happened. she pressed her lips together and told me it wasn't the only time it happened, and there are similar things happening in the world even today. we talked about africa, and the uyghurs and finally, palestine. i've never felt more speechless than at that moment when she told me the same people that went through the holocaust were responsible for the mass murder of palestinians. she quickly explained to me that not all jews are israelis, and certainly not all of them are zionists. that zionism is an ideology that makes people believe they have the right to kill others if it means they get the land they want.

we only ever talked about this genocide in context of the nature of human, greed, colonialism. it was never about religion. it was never "jews are the worst", it was never "jews are killers". it was always about a colonialist state, a colonialist system, the west supporting israel for their own gain from war and chaos. once again, no one painted "jews" as the bad guys.

as i said, i went to religious state schools, but the point of the school course we were taking wasn't to make everyone muslim, rather it was to teach us what Islam was. we all knew that we were free to choose whether to believe it or not after we learned it. i know some of my formerly muslim friends left Islam after high school. but while we were in school, we did all these extracurriculars where we researched about world issues and started campaigns to help those in need. some of you may not know this but the BDS movement existed back then as well, so senior students in my school would print lists of brands to boycott and hang them on the bulletin boards. the title would say "israeli products", not "jewish products". we understood that a whole market could not logically belong to the believers of a religion, it belonged to a certain state and we didn't want to endorse it because we knew it was killing innocent people. i started boycotting in seventh grade.

in high school, i had a world's religions and history class. we had to learn the basics of every common religion in the world. their beliefs system, their rules, their culture. it was all done from an objective point of view too. it wasn't like "these are the beliefs of the kafeer who will go to hell!!". our teachers would tell us if we want to be educated muslims we had to learn the basics of other religions so that we could compare and contrast, and be able to connect and debate with the believers of other religions. we had to learn so many things about judaism i don't even remember some of it. our finals test was on christianity, judaism and hinduism. they literally wouldn't let us graduate until we learned the basics of those religions.

i've seen my mom reading books like anne frank's diary, my dad would talk about his visits to churches and synagogues, he would encourage me to go visit different religions' worship places too. he would say it's important to understand them. to not be alienated from their world views just because we're muslims. growing up we always had holy scriptures of them at home too. a couple of different variations of the bible and torah. both in original script and translations. we had so many books about different religions, and my parents always encouraged me to read them. i haven't always been a muslim, there was a time when i had a lot of questions and skepticism about Islam as well. even then my parents would research with me, we would compare the holy books of different religions and see what they said about the same topics. in the end i decided to be a muslim, but not because i was conditioned, oppressed or forced into it. i was always taught to be respectful to other religions, and those who didn't believe in anything at all. i don't remember anyone telling me all jews needed to die or that they were all going to hell.

i explained all of this because i want any zionists who might be reading this to ask themselves, how many muslims have they known? have they ever read the Qur'an? have they ever studied Islam? have they ever been to a mosque? had their parents have books about Islam in their house? or our holy book? have they ever watched movies about us? have they ever learned out culture?

i want them to ask these to themselves not because i think they are obligated to do any of these, but because i need them to understand they don't know anything about the people they think hate them. they're so confident in their ignorance, they hear all these rumors about how intolerant and hateful muslims are but they never ask a real muslim, "hey, do you hate us? do you hate us because we're jewish?"

because as a muslim, i can answer from the bottom of my heart i don't hate jewish people. my stance against the state of israel does not equal hate for jews. i wish i could make you see this. because i do believe that there are some zionists who completely fall victim to this propaganda. so i hope someday you can see that the world doesn't hate you for your religion, or where you come from. they hate you for killing innocent people. it's really as simple as that.

[betterbooktitles]

Because I was taller than everyone else on my fifth-grade baseball team, my strike zone was slightly larger than most. That fact alone must have led to a few more pitches going unanswered when I was at bat. It also didn’t help that I was deathly afraid of the ball.

My dad, not the biggest sports enthusiast, took the time in the evenings after work both during and after baseball season to toss small plastic whiffle balls (about a 6th of the size of a regular baseball) at me that I would then swat a sad few feet from where we stood in the front yard. He was always in his dress clothes, and as the sun set behind him, it felt like everyone in our neighborhood was hiding inside during our 10-minute drill.

“Keep your eye on the ball.” he’d say before underhand tossing the practice pitch, having no idea the reason I had watched the last 9 strikes in one game pass the plate in front of me wasn’t an inability to see the ball coming, but the exact opposite: I saw it flying right at me and was frozen by fear.

Recently, I found the baseball cards they’d made for our rec teams. There I am smiling, bat in hand, not an inkling of fear on my face since I was staring down a camera and not a pitcher. The back of the cards featured my weight, height, and various stats, including 0 RBIs. The more impressive numbers reported: I had jumped from 5’1” to 5’11” over three summers.

Being tall at 12, and remaining relatively tall until most kids caught up with me in high school, had its advantages. I played center in basketball and rarely had to jump for a rebound, I was a decent first baseman because I wasn’t afraid of a ball when I had a mitt to catch it in, and adults, simply by virtue of my being the same size as them, mistakenly talked to me as if I were a peer. 

“The problem with this fucking place…” the new head of my community theater confided in me as I sat in the box office and handed a parent her change, “is there are too many chefs!” My new boss kept her flat black hair short and wore fat earrings. She was in her mid-50s and had been given the job after the board fired her friend and colleague of 15 years from the same position. Our new leader had spent much of her career teaching children how to sing in harmony, not fundraising and attending advertising meetings, and she was adjusting. I was 11 or 12, hearing an adult woman vent for the first time about what I had assumed was a nice promotion.

“It’s like that pasta fundraiser we did,” she continued, “Everyone brought in a sauce from home, but imagine if we had mixed them all together? You bring your grandma’s famous recipe in and dump it in with a bunch of Ragu, what does it taste like? It all tastes like Ragu, you know?”

I nodded as if I knew. “I get you.” I said, speaking slowly so my voice didn’t crack. I had recently visited New Orleans and had tried to yell something funny at my family while crossing the street, and out came a high-pitched whistle instead. A man in a suit walking past us mirthfully smiled to himself, knowing exactly what had happened. Since then, I remained cognizant of how deep I needed to keep my voice to not slip. Plus I wanted this woman to keep speaking to me like a coworker. “You don’t want to be watered down.”

“Yes. It’s like that. Imagine that for every person who brought in Ragu, someone else brought in a bottle of piss to mix in. That’s what the board meetings are like. Their ideas are like piss mixed into a pasta sauce.”

I giggled and quickly cleared my throat before saying in a deep voice: “Tell me about it.”

The disadvantage of tallness was that from 3rd to 6th grade, it was assumed that I could do everything myself. They started asking for tall guy favors. Tiny teachers asked me to retrieve supplies from high shelves and old ladies I didn’t know stopped me on the street and asked me to help carry their groceries from their cars. No one was worried about a boy who looked 18 at age 11, but that also meant I had to desperately seek out the right friends if I wanted to talk about Pokémon and anime instead of someone asking if I could buy them porn or cigarettes or firecrackers. Still, like many kids, I wanted to be older than I was and I relished my tall kid privilege. I walked to the mall alone, I walked into R-rated movies without anyone on staff stopping me, and I stood outside the back entrance of my community theater where the director and crew members smoked cigarettes and talked to them about their love lives. Never in my life did older people cover their mouths after they swore or steer conversations away from sex at the sight of me. 

This early independence may have been what my parents wanted.

“We treated you like little adults even though we knew we weren’t supposed to.” My mom revealed to me on a recent trip to see my family in North Carolina. In the open-concept house down the street from where my brother settled after college, we reminisced about Cleveland from afar, my brother chiming in periodically to say how our old neighborhood had changed for the better, what buildings had been demolished and rebuilt because they were a lost cause. Schools had been turned into suburban developments, dilapidated gyms became giant complexes for rec soccer leagues, and a bunch of fuck-up alcoholics we’d known in school had become successful lawyers (who still drank too much).

“We let you decide where we ate and what sports you played,” my Mom continued, “you weren’t supposed to let kids decide all that, even in the 90s.” 

My dad, half-awake in a recliner, said that when he told a friend how he used to leave his 11-year-old alone to make sure his 8-year-old son got the school bus on time every morning, and the friend said that practice was tantamount to child abuse. Whatever trauma I experienced from having time alone with my brother (?) fails to compare to how I feel about adults who spoke to me from age 10-15. 

By the time I was a teenager, I’d fully accepted my early adulthood. When I wasn’t playing a sport or acting in a play, my number one hobby was taking a John Updike book (sorry) to a coffee shop. I frequented a place within walking distance of my house in Cleveland called Talkies. I sat at the front bar with my book and ate a second lunch at 3 PM. I talked to random people sipping coffee and smoking cigarettes inside. One was a researcher at Case Western who studied molecular biology. He seemed to know no one in Cleveland except me and the baristas. Another guy was a white dude with dreadlocks, a gifted actor who bussed tables at the fancy restaurant next door. Every barista was a 20-something woman who told me about their various trysts in graphic detail. Multiple times the men offered me cigarettes or to split a joint outside. No wonder it took me years to finish one of the Rabbit novels. I was soaking up more than enough adult content in my real life than any book could offer.

The oddest encounter occurred at a hotel in Annapolis, Maryland when I was 15...

Read the rest here.

[nikisfwn]

"Idiots In Love" Alex Turner X Reader

Summary: You and Alex are in your final year of high school, exams are finally over so you're both stress free, or as the guys call you; idiots in love.

Warnings: swearing (as per usual)

Oh also, Isolation is where you would go in my school if you were being a dickhead in lessons. You got a warning if you didn't "fix your behaviour" you got sent to isolation or iso as everyone called it.

A/N: I seem to have an inability to write actual decently long fanfics. Which I am very disappointed in myself for because I love this one. Either way I hope you like it because I still love it but yeah, enjoy x

"Excuse me Miss Y/n, are you paying attention?" Your maths teacher, Mr Roberts broke you from your trance. "What-? Oh yeah, sorry sir." He sighed at you, "Y/n your name is already on the board for not paying attention, you have to go to isolation now." "Oh come on sir! Why?!" "There is nothing written in your book y/n." You took a quick glance down at the squared page with no writing on it in front of you. "Go on." Your teacher was looking at you as well as half the class. You scoffed, "Ugh, fine." You slammed the book shut, grabbed your pencil case and bag before walking out of the classroom.

You walked swiftly out of the main building and towards the small music block, it was funny how in such a short amount of time you learn where someone spends all of their free time. You quietly opened the door hearing the music coming from inside the building and walked in. Matt was the first to spot you, "Oi loverboy! Yer girlfriend's 'ere." Alex's head quickly shot up looking straight at the doorway for you, he stood up putting his guitar in its stand before walking across the room to you and hugging you tightly. "I didn't know you had a free period baby." He gave you a quick peck on the lips, "I don't, got sent to iso in maths." They all laughed at you, you joined in too as you sat down on a stool next to Alex.

"Okay, lets go to lunch then idiots." Matt said after they had all been practising for about an hour. "Sure, let's go." Alex stood up and offered you his hand, which you took and stood up too. You all grabbed your bags and walked out to the field. It was two weeks before the summer holidays and a massive 26 degrees so little to no one was sat inside or wearing their uniform properly. "Let's sit down by that tree." Jamie said pointing towards a free patch of shade by an old tree. And so you did, all walking over and sitting down on the dry crunching grass. Alex patted the spot of grass between his legs for you to sit. You sat down and leaned back into him while he leaned back onto the tree kissing the top of your head.

"I love you." You softly whispered to him while the other guys were talking. "I love you too baby." He smiled widely at you leaning down to kiss you on the lips. Andy scoffed from beside you. "Oh fuck off Andrew!" Alex kicked him and hugged you tightly. "You two are such idiots." Matt started laughing slightly. "No Matt! They're idiots in love!" Jamie corrected him laughing even more. "At least I have a fucking girlfriend cookie." You joined in laughing as all of them teased each other.

"Y/n is way out of your fucking league anyway mate." Matt commented. "No I'm not Helders!" You jokingly threw your jacket at him. "Totally are. You're way too pretty to be hanging out with us losers." "He makes a point, love. You're fuckin' stunnin'."

You laughed covering your face in embarrassment. "Shut up you dickeads."

"Never woman." They all laughed in unison because they managed to say it at the same time. "You're stuck with us all now darlin'." Alex said into your ear. "I wouldn't have it any other way my love."