#kim hongjoong x oc
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coupsie-daisies · 2 months ago
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Power Over Me - Part 1 | Jeong Yunho & Kim Hongjoong
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Pairing(s): Werewolf!Jeong Yunho x Witch!OC x Werewolf!Kim Hongjoong, Kim Hongjoong x Park Seonghwa, Jeong Yunho x Song Mingi
Genre: Smut (18+ ONLY), Urban Fantasy, College AU, Enemies to Lovers, Childhood Sweethearts, Hurt/Comfort
Summary: The sheer existence of Yunho's best friend, the person he imprinted on nearly a decade prior, near his pack sets Hongjoong on edge, and things go to absolute shit when everyone finds out why. Yet another thing that Blue has to fix, just like they always do.
Word Count: 25k
Warnings: Cussing, everyone in the pack is poly, unprotected sex, choking (technically nonsexual), excessive talk of scents, mentions of Knotting, mild infidelity, Yunho has a tragic backstory, angst (especially at the end of this chapter), voyeurism, I know I missed something so please let me know!!
Power Over Me Playlist
Power Over Me Pinterest Board
A/N: This is my piece for the Clownracha summer 2024 fic exchange. It's written for my beloved @ferrethyun, I hope you love it babe!
Tags: @dragonofthenorth0726 // @wooyussy // @burningupp-replies // @bunnypig18 // @brownieracha // @decaffedthoughts
Masterlist This fanfiction is property of @/coupsie-daisies, reposting on any platform is prohibited
Magic was, in its best state, a finicky thing. It relies entirely on a competent user to carry out its task, needing to be guided and shaped lest it break free and wreak havoc. Under a skilled, watchful eye, however, magic was a cure for just about anything. Magic is as old as the universe itself, and as time passes, the training of magic users and beings infused with its essence became essential to the growth of the world.
Those with the ability to manipulate magic were abundant in the world. It became common for them to rise to power or notability in many roles. Witches were in high demand as medics, teachers, mentors for those who knew less about the way the world worked. The water spirits and those that lived in the water worlds were vital to the growth of trade and travel. The Fae were consulted for matters beyond what the eye could see, and creatures of the night were revered for their power. As time went on, as the world grew and magic flourished along with it, the two became very intricately intertwined. So, naturally, the University of United Magic grew too.
The University started small, a coven of witches cooped up in a house where their elders taught others the trade, the tricks, and the sacred secrets of the past. Eventually, though, the University matured into a whole sprawling campus akin to any large college. All sorts of magic were taught within the looming buildings, and the lush nature that surrounded everything was healthier than anything touched by man's bare hands before.
Among the growing student body was one of the brightest witches on the continent, the child of two of the oldest, largest bloodlines in the history of magic. Of course, they had no intention of letting that go to their head. The rest of the student body, however, seemed to keep it fresh in their mind. People were never surprised when they came out top of their class yet again, or when they won another certificate or award of excellence. They simply understood magic in a way that other people couldn't begin to comprehend, forming it into something never before seen and harnessing it with the same level of care taken when handling a wild animal. It came more naturally to them than anything else.
Which, perhaps, was why they so rarely left their room beside for their classes, too busy experimenting with their newest brews or enchantment combinations. They were always seeking ways to grow their practice, if for no reason other than fucking around and finding out. Still, to say that they had privacy was a bit of a stretch. Not only were people regularly seeking their assistance with issues that basic magic couldn't begin to touch, but more often than not there was one particular werewolf stretched out on their bed, watching them work with a quiet, satisfied adoration.
"Must you stare at me when I'm working?" Blue deadpanned, looking over their shoulder for a moment before turning back to the swirling, shimmering liquid trapped in the beaker on their desk.
"I'm not staring! I'm just...watching. Like a normal person." Yunho answered casually. He sat up, long legs folding on the bed. He was, in fact, staring. But it was hard to blame him what with the way that he enjoyed magic. As a turned werewolf with no magical heritage, there wasn't much magic that he could practice himself. He had really only applied to the University to learn to brew his own remedies for his condition -- his rut suppressants and potions for the pain and whatnot. Not to mention that a degree in Magical Literature could come in handy in the future. But, most of all, Blue had applied to the University, and if there was one thing that had never changed about Jeong Yunho it was his dedication to following Blue around like a lost puppy. He'd been doing it since they were just little kids.
"Right, definitely normal. Can you pass me that bottle there? The lavender concentrate?" And like the obedient dog that he was, Yunho jumped up to pass the dropper bottle over to them. He stayed there, watching as they carefully dripped three perfect beads of the liquid into the mixture. It hissed, and bubbled, and turned a vicious shade of red before settling. It let off a subtle aroma of wood smoke and something sort of sweet. Blue seemed satisfied with this, wafting the steam towards them before carefully pouring it into a bottle and stoppering it. 
"What's that one for?" Yunho asked, picking up the bottle and turning it back and forth in his hands. Blue grabbed one of the sticker labels that was laying on their desk and scrawled a name onto it.
"It's a fuel substitute for fire demons. For Juyeon from our History of Enchantments class last semester. He's been having trouble with his current fuel, so this should help him until he can get it sorted out." They got up, taking the bottle from Yunho, labeling it, and tucking it into their bag.
They were always doing things like this, working tirelessly to help others in new and creative ways and expecting nothing in return. Yunho admired that. They said it was their duty to the world, to do what they could for those who couldn't. They'd been studying magic since they were little, learning under their grandmother and picking up tricks from covens all over the world. Blue's grandmother was one of the most powerful witches in the entire country, and most importantly, she was a wonderful woman. Yunho remembered that very well from their childhood, from the day he'd met her and Blue so many years prior.
The day Yunho met Blue was a blur in his mind. He'd lost a lot of blood, and the therapists said that trauma could make his memories disjointed on top of it. But he remembered the fresh linens hanging outside, the way that the breeze carried the scent, and how it was so strong in that moment.
He wasn't sure how the old woman had found him, or how she'd been strong enough to get him back to her cottage all by herself. He didn't remember how long the walk had been from the forest to the front door, but surely it had been a lot of work. But he did remember how she'd laid him carefully on a blanket on the workbench, the way that the pain had seared through him, and how he'd cried. It wasn't the violent, heavy sort of crying - he didn't have the energy for that - but it had felt like it to him. Every heaved breath ripped through his body like the claws that had put him in this state in the first place.
Grandmother recognized his condition easily as she worked her magic to heal him, stitching his wounds back together with her gentle chanting. This room, Yunho remembered, looked very much like what he'd imagined a witch's home to look like. There were dried herbs hanging from the ceiling, and sigils painted on the door frame, and the shelves and cupboards that lined the walls were full of jars and bottles of things he didn't know about, all labeled and neatly organized.
And then there was Blue. They were so small and unassuming as they stood against the wall, far enough out of the way that their grandmother could work but not so far that they couldn't examine what was being done to him. Yunho remembered their eyes; wide, and curious, but so very calm in the face of all the blood and pain.
Grandmother hurried around the room, speaking as she gathered her ingredients -- maybe to herself, or maybe to her grandchild who was certainly listening intently. She measured everything carefully into a bowl, beginning to grind everything together and chanting something over it, a language Yunho didn't recognize. He was cold, but it was so late in the summer, and that would have worried him if he wasn't so preoccupied by how sleepy he was getting. His eyes were growing heavier by the second, and every breath was beginning to feel like an uphill battle. Was he shivering? His mom had his jacket in case the night got cold on the way home, he wondered why she didn't put it on him before he left. Or maybe she'd just brought it with her...wherever she was now.
"Stay with us, now. Just a little longer." Grandmother soothed, her voice gentle and worn like the leather bracelets that Yunho admired when he went into town. He liked those, and he liked her voice too. "Bluebell, now."
Bluebell. The word repeated in his mind as he watched the child across the room jump into action. It sounded so pretty the way it rang in his ears.
"Bluebell," He repeated, he wasn't sure why, and it was so quiet that he could barely hear it. Then they looked at him with those eyes again. Maybe that was their name, it would be very well suited to them, he decided, so pretty. They were very pretty too. But not like flowers, he thought, like the rocks along the edge of the stream. Different, not so delicate and fragile as the flowers, special, something that he wanted to hold onto.
They passed something to their grandmother, a small jar of ground ingredients that she sprinkled into the discolored mush in her bowl. Then she mixed some more, asking for more jars and adding them to her odd mixture before moving closer to him.
"This might hurt," Bluebell said quietly. "You can hold my hand if you want to."
They offered their little hand to them, and Yunho took it in his. They must have been near the same age, but he was already big for his age. His parents said he'd be taller than his dad if he kept growing like this. He thought he'd like that a lot, being tall was very important to him at eight years old. He reached for their hand, holding it in his weakly on the table.
Blue watched on, caring eyes scanning his face for discomfort when Grandmother began applying the poultice to his wounds. He was weak, and tired, but even so he hissed at the burn and tried to squirm himself away, but he couldn't make it very far in his condition anyway. Grandmother shushed him, but not in the mean way that most adults shushed him, it sounded more like a comfort.
"Will he be okay?" Blue asked. Yunho's eyes were squeezed shut, and he gripped their hand a little tighter when they tried to pull it away. They didn't try to move again afterwards.
"He'll be alright. I'll wrap his wounds up and we'll let him rest for a while. I imagine he must be very tired now." Grandmother said. Yunho heard her begin to move around, cleaning up the messes she'd made. A hand stroked his hair, now damp with sweat and maybe a little bit of blood. "We'll get him cleaned up and fed when he wakes up. But for now, I think we best leave him alone."
"I don't want to leave him alone. Can I stay until it's time to eat?" Blue asked. It wouldn't really matter anymore, Yunho was already fast asleep on the bench, his hand relaxing in theirs. But their grandmother nodded anyway, a smile on her face. She was sure that Yunho would recover just fine with Bluebell at his side.
"You're, like, a really good person," Yunho said, settling back onto his friend's bed. Blue rolled their eyes. This was something that Yunho felt the need to tell them often. And, sure, it was nice being praised, but Blue didn't do this sort of thing for the praise or the gratitude. If anything, they did it because they felt obligated to. See, very few witches understood the intricacies of magic the way that they could. That meant that it was their responsibility to help how they could, to teach what they discovered, the things that they learned. Which was also part of why they always had tutoring slots open -- not that they really wanted to be teaching people who were most interested in cheating off their work. But Blue did it all, most importantly in their opinion, because they loved magic.
"Can you stop with that?" They said, pulling out a notebook that they'd filled with their goals for the week and scratching off a bullet point. "You praise me too much."
Yunho shrugged.
"I'm serious, though! You know that. I know a lot of people who wouldn't try half as hard as you do even if they were getting something out of it."
Blue was about to argue back when a knock sounded at their door. It was a sound that they sometimes dreaded, but this time they were relieved to have someone intervene and cut Yunho's rants short. They jumped up from their chair, stepping over Yunho's bookbag on the floor and opening the bedroom door.
"Hyung," Yunho said, surprise evident in his voice as he perked up from the other side of the room.
"What brings you here?" Blue asked, stepping aside to let the older man inside. Seonghwa looked breathtaking as he always did, maybe a side effect of being an Incubus, or maybe just sheer luck. He brushed his hand through his dark, wavy hair, looking between Yunho and Blue.
There weren't many things that weren't shared in Yunho's pack, very few secrets existed between the boys, so Blue knew it must be fairly severe for Seonghwa to be hesitating in front of the werewolf.
"Do you need to talk to me in private?" Blue asked. They didn't notice the way that Yunho started to sulk before the other man even got a chance to answer. He wasn't obsessed with Blue. They were, however, attached at the hip and had been for so long that most people found it unnatural being around only one of them or the other outside of classes. Everyone knew they were a package deal. If you wanted Blue, you could count on having to deal with Yunho. So Seonghwa shook his head.
"No, it's fine." He answered, making himself comfortable in the plush armchair pushed into the corner of Blue's dorm. The witch nodded, sitting back down at their desk. "I really hate to do this, I know you're always busy, but I think I might need your help Y/N."
They flipped to a new page in their notebook, already writing Seongwha's name at the top before looking back to him.
"What can I do for you?" They asked. To anyone else, it might have seemed clinical, but the upward tilt at the corner of their lips spoke volumes to their friends.
"I need a...I need something to help me not need to...feed so often." He explained, a pretty flush creeping up his neck as his dark eyes flickered to Yunho. Yunho choked on a flustered cough, dropping his gaze to his hands which were suddenly busying themselves with one of the plushies on Blue's bed. Blue, however, wasn't bothered in the least.
"And has the need been getting stronger lately?" They asked, jotting down a quick note on the page. "Or has this always been a problem for you? Not being able to have enough sex to satiate your hunger?"
It was clear that their lack of discomfort around the topic helped Seonghwa relax, an easy smile starting to creep onto his face.
"It's not been a problem before, not since I was a lot younger. But I'm reaching the peak maturity of a sex demon, it's about time for my hunger to peak, isn't it?" He pointed out. Blue nodded. "It wouldn't be a problem, but I'm too busy to be meeting the need. I just wanted to...improve my quality of life, I guess."
Blue gave another understanding hum, not that they had any experience with an Incubus' need for sex first hand, but they'd read about it plenty. Of course they had. Besides, they'd known Seonghwa since he'd met Yunho back when the two started at the University.
"Have you tried heat suppressants? That's what the nurses recommend, right?" It wasn't exactly the same, but it was supposed to have a similar effect.
"Yeah, I tried, but it didn't help. Just made me feel weird. Hongjoong said they made me smell weird." His nose crinkled at the idea of smelling bad. Blue laughed.
"So Hongjoong doesn't mind you trying to dial your sex drive back? I figured he'd be jumping at the opportunity to sleep with you more." They half scoffed. Hongjoong was a werewolf like Yunho, the leader of the pack. He'd first met Seonghwa during his rut and practically drove the rest of the pack members out of the dorm for a few days.
It made sense, really, for a hungry sex demon to be drawn to someone who couldn't be satiated. A match made in heaven, especially since they bonded not long after. As much as Blue didn't get along with Hongjoong, they made a good couple.
"With his extra class this semester he doesn't have time to keep up with me either." Seonghwa admitted. The two of them had an oddly competitive relationship, Blue chalked that up to Hongjoong being the overly intense, proud bastard that he was.
"Right, so heat suppressants are a no go, have you tried lust potions?" A dumb question considering he wouldn't be here if he hadn't already jumped through all the hoops already, but they had to ask anyway. Seonghwa nodded. "Alright, I'll try to figure something out. Just give me a bit of time. Yunho, library trip?"
The library was a place that both Blue and Yunho frequented, generally together, and generally tucked into the same study room they were in now. It was easier for them to work together behind locked doors where they couldn't be bothered or bother anyone else. There was a precarious stack of books sitting to Blue's left, and a handful more flipped open and spread out on the table. Their notebook was laid in front of them while Yunho slumped back in his chair, spinning his pen around his long fingers.
"So, what's the problem again?" He asked. Blue sighed, rubbing the bridge of their nose before turning back to the books.
"Incubi need sex to live. It feeds them, keeps their souls burning and tied to their bodies. Seonghwa is trying to find a way to obtain the energy he needs without actually having to have sex." They said, drumming their pen against the paper with a dull tap, tap, tap.
"Right. And that's difficult why exactly?"
"Well, if the heat suppressants didn't work, it means that he doesn't need to suppress the need to feed. He needs a supplement. Kinda like....a vitamin." They sat up straighter, pulling one of the books closer to them and flipping through a few pages. "But I'm not sure how to make a supplement for sex. Or if it's even possible."
Yunho took one of the books off the stack, a thick, heavy one on all sorts of advanced potions that he hadn't even begun to study yet. He traced a finger down the index page.
"If anyone can figure it out, it's you. What about a modified aphrodisiac potion?"
"Aphrodisiacs are known to stimulate Incubi hunger. It'll make it worse." They dismissed the idea.
"What if you, like, reversed the effects or something? Like you did for that one project last year."
Blue shook their head again. This did this often, posed a problem to Yunho and let him throw darts. He always missed, never really coming up with a helpful solution, but it did push Blue to think outside of the box, seeking ideas that they couldn't find on their own. And as far as Yunho was concerned, helping them by being incompetent about magic was still helping them and it still did wonders for his ego.
"There's ingredients that wouldn't work properly together. It could cause a lot of problems. I don't think I should be taking that risk unless we really can't figure out something better suited." They picked up a different book, beginning to flip through it.
"I was thinking maybe there's some sort of preexisting magic that we could...I don't know, harness, I guess? Concentrate and manipulate and use as ingredients. It might be difficult, but I don't think that simple ingredients are gonna cut it."
Blue slumped back in their chair, bringing the book closer to their face and scrunching up their nose as they tried to think. It was a habit that they'd had since they were just little, their entire face growing tight when they worked on something hard. It made Yunho want to reach out and smooth away the wrinkles, tell them to relax, remind them that they were downright brilliant and would get there if they just gave themselves time.
"Okay, what kind of magic do you think could help? I don't imagine nature magic could be of much use." He said, doodling on the cover of his own notebook.
"Maybe some sort of love or illusion magic. If I can concentrate that, pour it into a mix sort of like the fuel potion I made, it could act as a substitute for the type of energy they get from sex. Maybe a siren might be able to help? But I don't think there's a way to make that physical." They looked around, scanning the titles of the books they'd been tossing around carelessly. "Have you seen my book on-"
"Sirens and merpeople?" Yunho carefully shifted the books on the table until he could hand them the volume they were looking for. Blue thanked him in a barely there voice, flipping to a chapter about Siren magic. It had always fascinated them, it didn't work the way that most illusion magic did. It was like a spell cast by the Siren's bodies themselves. Nobody had been able to harness it, which led to a whole revolution some hundreds of years ago after a handful of revolts by Sirens in unjust magical study environments, a very nasty thing with lots of losses on both sides, though the Sirens had won their rights and their respect from it. So, all things considered, Blue really didn't expect to be the magical researcher to figure that one out, at least not at such a young age.
"Maybe a Cupid?" Yunho asked. It was an offhanded comment as he picked at a callous on his hand, but the lack of a response caught his attention. He watched with wide eyes as Blue's grin grew.
"Yunho, you might just be a genius." They said. "I'll need to talk to some people, see if they might be willing to transfer a couple samples to me. I haven't worked hands on with Cupid magic before, it's real unpredictable stuff. Hence all the stories and whatnot. They get their names from a truly tragic story, but you know all that already."
"Maybe Mingi can help. He should be back from visiting home soon." Yunho was still beaming from the praise, chest warm.
Yunho's relationship with Mingi was...complicated. They weren't boyfriends, not technically, and it was hard to say if either of them were properly in love with each other, but there was an unrivaled sort of affection there. They were happy when they were together, and they brought out the best in each other. So they were together often, not to mention they shared a room at the pack dorm. Most of the relationships between the pack were like that, hard to define and transcending the typical rules of friendship. They were based on the innate feeling that came from being together. Blue admired that, or maybe they craved that. It was sort of like how they were with Yunho after all the years together.
"Perfect. You'll let me know as soon as he's back, right?" Blue questioned, still flipping through their books. After all, it never hurt to have a backup plan, and a backup backup plan. So on and so forth, they were nothing if not prepared. Yunho just nodded quietly as if it were a dumb question to ask him.
As they continued reading up on all sorts of different magic that may or may not be an effective sex substitute, Blue found their will to stay awake dwindling. Their eyes were heavy, and a glance at the time told them that it was significantly later than they'd realized. It was a few more hours of groggy studying before their head dipped onto their arm, cheek squished against their forearm and eyes shut tight.
Yunho looked up from the essay he was working on about some book published about sixty years before he was born, a fond smile growing on his lips. This was another constant, almost as regular as their library study sessions. Blue was comfortable around Yunho in a way that they weren't with nearly anyone else. They let their guard down enough to find peace with him, to fall into rest even when they weren't trying to. Yunho never said anything about it, lord knows they needed the sleep.
So the two of them stayed put for a while longer, Yunho working on his project and Blue drooling just a little onto their arm. After another hour or so of them not stirring even a little bit, Yunho began to worry about them waking up stiff. So he packed up his things, and cleaned up as many of the books around them as he could without disturbing Blue's nap. Finally, once almost everything was put away, he shook them awake lightly. It took a couple of tries to get them to fully blink their eyes open, squinting up against the fluorescent lights.
"Morning, sleeping beauty." He teased, reaching to brush their hair back into place while they rubbed their eyes. It damn near made his heart ache seeing them like this. It always reminded him of when they were little kids and he'd stop by their house to pick them up on the walk to school. "Do you wanna go back to yours or stay at my place for the night?"
With Mingi gone, there was nobody sharing his room back at the Pack's dorm so, like he generally did, he invited Blue to stay the night. It was closer anyway.
"We can go back to my dorm. Don't wanna bother the pack."
They both knew what that really meant; They didn't want to see Hongjoong in the morning. Despite Blue having a close relationship with everyone in the back, and Hongjoong being in charge, the two of them could never seem to get along. Blue had really tried at first, it was important for Yunho to have a pack and they'd never want to stand in the way of that. Still, no matter how much Yunho played the buffer, the two just couldn't be around each other. So he didn't argue, just stood up and shrugged.
"I'll go put these books on the return cart. Meet you out there, okay?" He easily scooped up the stack of books from the table, piled concerningly high, and managed to nudge the door open.
Blue moved slowly, their body weighed down with grogginess and their brain refusing to focus. Their mind was fogged over with sleep and the fading warmth that hung around with it. But soon enough all of their things were neatly organized in their bag and they found Yunho waiting right where he said he would.
The walk back to Blue's apartment was short, but it was taking longer with them dragging their feet. Yunho silently arranged his backpack to sit against the front of him, crouching down to pick Blue up on his back. Normally they argued, but they never said no to a piggy back ride. This time they didn't even speak as they climbed onto his back and let him take their weight.
Winter was just around the corner, and the late fall air bit at their cheeks and their fingertips. Blue hated the cold, but luckily Yunho played personal space heater, more than happy to hold them close and warm their cold hands in his own.
When they got back, it was late enough into the night that all of Blue's own roommates were asleep besides Yeji, but her nocturnal nature always kept her up more often than she would have liked. But even she was tucked into her room for the night when the door code chimed them in. It was easy for the two to move in unison, taking their shoes off and making for Blue's bedroom. Yunho continued inside, finding clothes in the dresser drawer devoted to him while Blue detoured to the bathroom.
Nights like this were easy, space shared in comfortable silence as they both got ready to sleep. They worked around each other like a well oiled machine, Blue washing their face while Yunho brushed his teeth next to them, taking turns getting changed. Impromptu sleepovers were almost over-practiced. So as Yunho climbed into Blue's bed, taking his side by the wall and waiting for them to finish up, he didn't feel anything less than at home surrounded by the scent of them. Blackberry and vanilla and warm musk cutting the sweetness surrounded him, as it should be in his mind. It was his favorite scent, a vast ocean of Blue that he set himself afloat in, washed away in the calm waves.
When Blue finally came back, they were wrapped in one of Yunho's shirts, face glowy from being freshly washed and eyelids growing heavy with sleep again. They climbed into the bed next to him, and even in his half asleep state, Yunho welcomed them into his arms. He nuzzled his nose against their hair once they'd gotten comfortable. Blue's presence calmed him down from even the worst moods. They smelled like home, and Blue was the closest thing to home that Yunho had anyways.
"Go to sleep," They mumbled, almost as if they could sense the way his mind was sinking dangerously into memories of the past. Thinking about his childhood had a habit of keeping Yunho awake at night more often than he cared to admit, but Blue could read him like a book. They saw through him when he'd act like he got enough sleep, or when he'd wake up beside them and insist it wasn't because of a nightmare.
"I will. You first," He said. And generally they would argue, they always did with their endlessly caring nature, but they couldn't find the energy to argue this time. They closed their eyes, relaxing next to him.
Yunho laid there for a while, idly stroking Blue's arm until he was sure they'd fallen asleep next to him. Then he was alone with his thoughts, a dangerous pastime. When he was alone with his thoughts, the guilt started to set in all over again. There was a familiar feeling of missing what could have been so badly that it ached settling into his bones, and for a moment it was like he couldn't breathe at all with how heavy it sat on his chest.
The first time that Blue slept beside Yunho was nearly a year after they first met. It was late evening, and he'd been laying in his room at their grandmother's house since morning. He'd gotten much more used to the moons, but sometimes it still brought out a side of him that he was afraid of, a side of him that reminded him on the night he'd lost everything. His home, his family, his humanity.
That was the thought that made him curl in on himself, tears running down his face. He was old enough now that it felt embarrassing to cry like this, so desperately. Nevertheless, the sobs shook his body and his tears stained the pillow under his head. His entire body was still aching from the transformation even after he took the tonic he'd been given.
He'd known Blue was there when he came, but he was too ashamed to face them, too exhausted. He felt like a monster all over again, he shouldn't be trusted to be near anyone, let alone someone who wouldn't hurt a fly. He shivered in the bed then, the only light shining in was from the waning moon through the window, casting the room in an eerie, silvery glow that sent a shock of terror through Yunho's body.
He heard the door creak open, and he buried himself even deeper beneath the worn blanket. He could smell them, the familiar scent signaling the identity of his visitor. He wasn't used to that still, how intense all of his senses were now. It had given him migraines for several months until he adjusted to it. Grandmother said that they'd fade with time. He hadn't had anyone else to ask, so he'd just had to grit his teeth and trust her.
"Yun?" Blue whispered, closing the door behind them and tiptoeing closer to his bedside. "I brought your medicine. You should take it if you're awake."
They sat at the end of the bed, tentatively reaching out to touch his leg, checking to see if he was awake. He jumped nearly out of the bed at the touch. His eyes were so big and round and filled with a terror that made Blue pout.
"Did I scare you? I'm sorry." They held out the vial like a peace offering. Yunho took it with shaky hands.
"You should go," He said, fumbling with the cork in the vial. Blue reached out, touching his hand gently to move it aside and opening the vial for him. He drank the liquid, wincing at the bitterness coating his throat. "It's not safe with me."
Blue furrowed their brow, taking the vial from him and setting it on the table by the bed.
"My grandmother wouldn't let you stay here if you were dangerous," They said, voice entirely matter-of-fact. "Besides, you're just a kid. You can't be so dangerous."
"I'm a werewolf," He argued.
"Yeah, but you're a boy too. And your transformation won't happen again for a month. So I don't think you're very dangerous as just a boy." They poked at his arm as if testing to see if he was stronger than they thought. He was, but they didn't mention anything about that. "You should sleep, you know. You need a lot of rest to recover, that's what my grandmother says."
They were so young, not yet ten, but they spoke like they knew so much more about the world than he did. He nodded. And maybe he knew back then that he'd follow them wherever they led him.
"Do you want me to stay until you fall asleep?" They asked. Yunho hesitated. He didn't want to be alone, but more than that, he wasn't sure if he trusted himself. Blue must have seen the dilemma he was having written across his face, because they shooed him over on the bed and laid down beside him. "Close your eyes."
He did as they said, closing his eyes and breathing them in. They reached out, stroking his hair out of his face like his mother used to, like their grandmother did too.
"I'll stay, you don't have to worry. Just sleep now."
It was such a confident statement, and his mind and heart were yearning to believe it. So he closed his eyes, and Blue fell asleep before he did. Even so, he didn't run away. How could he?
Several more days of tireless research and experiment followed their long night at the library, and several more requests from classmates were filled by Blue in between classes, and homework, and little dates with Yunho at their favorite cafes and the arcade that he frequented with the boys. Finally, Mingi came back from his time away, and Blue was kicking their brain back into high gear.
Yunho was still in class when Blue made it to the pack's dorm, and Blue triple checked the schedule in their phone to make sure that Mingi would be home. They knocked on the door and waited for someone to open it. However, several moments passed by with nobody acknowledging their presence. So they knocked again, louder and longer this time. They'd barely managed to pull their hand away from the door when it swung open. On the other side was Hongjoong, quite possibly the only person in the entire world that simply couldn't stand Blue by presence alone.
"Yunho isn't home yet," He said, moving to let the door close in their face, but Blue pressed their palm against the wood.
"I'm not here for Yunho."
A flicker of confusion, and maybe frustration, washed across Hongjoong's pixieish features as he silently questioned what could have brought them there besides Yunho. Hongjoong wasn't a bad person, at least anyone who knew him well believed that to be true, but he was viciously protective. Much to his chagrin, Blue liked to joke that he was an under-trained guard dog, and he supposed it made some kind of sense. He didn't like feeling like his emotions were out of control, which meant he didn't like having new people in his space. Usually the pack kept their friends and flings out of the dorm, not entirely to keep them away from Hongjoong, but they wouldn't say it was entirely unrelated. But Yunho and Blue had been together for so long that separating them was an act of cruelty, even for Hongjoong.
"Why are you here, then?"
"Is Mingi here? I had a few questions about Cupids, and Yunho said he got home last night." Blue took a step closer in hopes that Hongjoong would move enough to let them in. Unfortunately, he was just as stubborn as they were. He didn't budge, leaving them intimidatingly and uncomfortably close to each other. Despite Hongjoong's relatively small stature, the aura about him was enough to send shivers down anyone's spine. Blue crossed their arms over their chest.
"He just got back, he should have time to relax. He hasn't been home in a while. Besides, don't you spend all of your time with your nose in a book? Can't you get your information from that? Since when do you ask for help?" He scoffed, lips turning up into a sinister smirk. The one he always got when he felt challenged. Blue had been dealing with Hongjoong's inexplicable prejudice for long enough to know that he was all bark and no bite.
"What better way to learn than from the source? But I guess you wouldn't know anything about that. I've never even seen you pick up a book." They pressed even closer, and the way their scent wrapped around him and the warmth of their skin radiated against him was enough to knock Hongjoong back a couple of steps, leaving room for Blue to step past him.
Hongjoong made a sound in his throat, one that couldn't quite be considered a growl, though it still made the hairs on Blue's arms raise. They kicked off their shoes and made themselves at home like they always did. Hongjoong tried not to snap. It wasn't even entirely Blue's fault, the moon was coming around, and he always got unreasonable this time of the cycle. Especially when someone he didn't want around was invading his home.
"Whatever. He's in his room, go bother him instead of me." He returned to the sitting area, flopping into the plush armchair with his phone.
"Whatever you say, Alpha," Blue said, not giving him a chance to bite back before heading for Yunho and Mingi's room.
Getting the pack all together in one dorm had been an ordeal that Hongjoong and Seonghwa had fought through tooth and nail during Blue and Yunho's second year at the University. They'd petitioned the board, claiming that having the pack be separated was detrimental to their health and, in turn, their ability to attend their classes and be upstanding students. It wasn't untrue in the least, being apart from the pack was hard on them all, especially those from pack-oriented species, and the school would have been stupid to fight them and risk stepping on a law or two in the process.
So, the boys had been moved into one of the largest dorms on campus, a four bedroom accommodation with two full bathrooms and a decent kitchen. The living room was a little cramped, but none of them ever minded. As such, all the boys were stacked two to a room, but that tended to work in their favor anyway.
Blue knocked on the door, waiting for the deep cadence of Mingi's voice to invite them in before turning the handle. The Cupid was sitting on his bed, wrapped in a cozy looking hoodie with his platinum hair falling unstyled in his face. When he saw Blue, a grin split his face. The two of them were fairly close given the relationships they'd both built with Yunho.
"Hey Mingi," They greeted, sitting down on Yunho's bed opposite him. "I hope I'm not interrupting you. Yunnie said he'd make sure you made time for me, but I don't wanna bug you."
Mingi shook his head, fingers fidgeting with the charm hanging on his phone case, a gift from Blue for his birthday - imbued with an anti-anxiety charm.
"You're not bothering me, don't worry. I'm not sure what you needed me for, though."
"I'm trying to work on something for a friend, but I'm coming up short. I was thinking that maybe if you teach me about Cupid magic I might be able to figure it out." They explained, flashing a sickeningly sweet smile at him, the one that made people melt to their will.
"Me?" Mingi was surprised, but Blue nodded adamantly.
"Yes, you. You're one of the only people I know that's patient enough to stand me. Plus, you're my favorite Cupid. But don't tell Channie, he'd be so sad." They laughed, fishing in their bag for a notebook and a pen. "So, can you tell me how it works?"
The next half an hour was Mingi trying and sort of failing to explain how Cupids harnessed their magic to guide people to each other. It was an essence, he explained, showing them the shimmering magic that he could produce. It played sort of like a pheromone but in spell form, a magical component of attraction that emulated the feeling of falling in love with someone. Even just being in the presence of Mingi as he let the pink haze sparkle between his palms was making Blue's mind feel a little bit strange. 
Blue reached out, feeling the way the air around the magic pulsed and plucked the magic from Mingi's hand, willing it into their own palm. That was another thing that Blue picked up easily, the manipulation of unfamiliar magic. It was, if they were to be completely transparent, the only reason that they excelled so heavily in their classes. Magic seemed to obey them in a way that it didn't for most people. They swirled the mist around their fingers before drawing a bottle from their bag to cast it into. They watched the way it moved, calm and slow like a miniature galaxy wrapped up in glass.
"You're the best, Mingi. I might be back if I need more help figuring it out. Is that okay?" They asked as they stood up. Mingi got up with them, stretching his arms over his head.
"Please, when have I ever said no to you? You can come over whenever." He said, a shy, sincere smile rising on his face. See, Yunho had a soft spot for Blue, and Ming had a soft spot for Yunho, so what the three of them shared was particularly special. Blue was grateful for it, the knowledge that they could trust Mingi the same way that they did Yunho, and that Mingi would always take care of him if Blue wasn't able to. They smiled at him, reaching out to squeeze his hand before heading for the door with the Cupid hot on their heels.
"I should go. Lots of work to do. But I'll let you know how this goes? We can grab coffee or something?" They said, situating their bag back on their shoulder and sliding their shoes on at the door. They spared a smile and a wave over to where Yeosang and wooyoung were cuddled up in their makeshift movie night nest. "And don't forget about game night at my place on Friday. Everyone's invited, Yunho's idea. Let me know who all is coming."
And with that Blue was back on their way, leaving the building with a bounce in their step as they headed home to pour themselves into Seonghwa's supplement.
It was another two days before Yunho saw Blue, far too long as far as he was concerned. Which was why he turned up at their door, being greeted at the door by one of their roommates on the way out. She smiled and let him in before closing the door behind herself. Their other two roommates were playing some video game in the sitting room, bickering aimlessly about something as they tended to be when he came in. They paused long enough to say hi and tell him that Blue was still cooped up in their room. 
"Can you bring them something to eat? I don't think they've been out since last night." One of them added. He was sweet, a guardian angel with visuals more like a pixie, and he had a habit of keeping his watchful eye on his friends.
"Thanks, Woong." Yunho sighed, grateful that he’d already planned ahead. He knew well that Blue had a habit of locking into whatever project they were working on and completely forgetting their own basic needs.
He didn't bother knocking on the door, knowing they wouldn't answer, expecting it to be one of their roommates checking up on them. He let himself in, and even upon realizing that it was Yunho, Blue didn't look up from the elaborate spread of materials set up on the desk.
"Yunnie, sorry I didn't answer your messages. Been busy," They said, finally sparing a glance and a tired smile over their shoulder. They looked downright exhausted, but that spark in their eye was burning brighter than ever.
"You're almost done now?" He asked, recognizing the look. They were pushing through the last leg now, more determined than they were when they started. He held out the container of food he'd packed from home for them, and they took it. Immediately they set it to the side, returning to stirring the miniature cauldron sitting on their desk.
"I think so. Just a few more minutes, then I can add in the final ingredients and then....I think it'll be all done after that." They smiled, that wholeheartedly proud one that made Yunho feel like his chest was being lit on fire. "Do you wanna try it for me? I wanna make sure I didn't add too much of the Cupid magic concentrate."
The average person may have shied away from being used as a glorified magical lab rat, but Blue was nothing if not diligent, and Yunho had tried so many potions and spells for them that he knew he could trust them with his well-being. Barring the time that they accidentally made his skin start turning blue, but that was apparently some sort of magical allergy. So he nodded and moved to sit down out of their way.
"Do you think it'll still work if I'm not a sex demon? Shouldn't you ask Soyeon or someone to help you out?" He asked. They held up a hand for him to pause, sprinkling a dark powder into the mixture and chanting a few words over it. Once they were done, they spun in their chair to face him.
"It should be enough to see if its intended effects are strong enough. And then I can ask Seonghwa to help me tweak it from there. But I just wanna get it to him as soon as I can. He really seems to be struggling with this."
Yunho scrunched up his nose. From the amount of nights he'd had to sleep with headphones on, it didn't sound like Seonghwa was suffering exactly, but he didn't feel the need to divulge that. Blue turned back to the potion, pouring a small bit of it into a tiny cup and offering it to him.
"Drink. It might still be a little warm, and it probably tastes like ass, but that's what this is for." They explained, offering up a piece of candy along with the potion. He hesitated, looking down at the cup full of deep maroon liquid. He swirled it around the cup before caving under his best friend's heavy gaze. He took a breath, then threw the potion back in one swift move, swallowing it as quickly as he could and trying desperately not to gag at the taste that coated the inside of his mouth. The candy followed quickly after, easing the horror he'd experienced.
"And what exactly is this supposed to do?" He asked, even as he felt a creeping warmth running through him.
"Make you feel like you've just had an orgasm, basically. That afterglow, you know? Sexual satisfaction. That's the feeling that Seonghwa feeds off of." They said it so nonchalantly that Yunho nearly choked. He was no virgin, but he wasn't even sure that he could put a finger on that feeling that Blue was describing. "I would try it for myself, but sometimes I sort of...wish my magic into working on myself. But I haven't managed to do that with anyone else. Not yet."
Yunho was trying to listen, but he was too distracted by the heat radiating through him, the relaxation tugging at his muscles. He shivered, humming out a pleased little sigh. His head felt a little heavy, and his body almost ached with the feeling of relief.
"Yeah, I think it's working." He said. Blue looked over, jotting down a quick note about the way that his face had flushed in their notebook, and Yunho couldn't tell the dull shock of vulnerability apart from the faded shivers of pleasure that thrummed through him. There was something about being so openly observed in that state that he couldn't exactly explain, so he was grateful that they didn't ask.
"Good. We can deliver this tomorrow. Don't think I feel up to the Pack right now," They admitted. Yunho had closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall. He definitely understood that. Despite their sometimes excitable roommates, Blue's dorm was much calmer than his own. Maybe that was a small part of why he escaped to their room so often. Second, always, to spending time with Blue.
"Sure, whatever you want babe." He agreed, opening his eyes to look at them. Blue nearly startled at how dark his gaze was, weighing heavy on them. "How long is this thing supposed to last?"
"A few more minutes. Shouldn't be longer than 30?" They didn't sound sure about that, and Yunho shook his head in disbelief.
"Why do I let you do your little experiments on me, again?"
Blue opened the container of food, finally beginning to eat and setting Yunho's mind at ease.
"Because you love me so much that you'd do anything for me. Duh."
Right. Duh.
Days at the Pack House were always full of chaos. Even the most normal days like this one had a lot going on. To be expected when you had a dorm full of young men of supernatural descent. It was almost time for the moon, which meant that Yunho's anxiety was peaked, and that time of the month was when Blue spent the most time at the dorms. Which, coincidentally, was when Hongjoong spent the most time out of the dorm. Surely unrelated, Yunho insisted, but Blue knew better. And, quite frankly, they were silently grateful for his absence. One moody werewolf was more than enough for them.
But Hongjoong being out when he was at his most vulnerable, or at least at his most volatile, usually meant that Seonghwa went with him to keep him out of trouble. So Blue became something of a dorm mother, helping to keep everything tidy and keep everyone fed.
 It was a good thing for them too, they figured, kept them from diving too deep into their work when they should be taking care of themselves. Surrounding themselves with people who took care of them in return instead of other students who just treated them as some sort of magical ATM was - unsurprisingly - good for their mental health. They sighed, stirring the fried rice they were prepping for everyone's lunches.
Meal prepping wasn't on the metaphorical list of responsibilities for them, but it was a comfort that they found. And Seonghwa let them since it meant everyone was being pampered. So they carefully packed the pork they'd cooked earlier into containers while waiting for the rice to finish up. Meanwhile, San had coaxed Wooyoung and Jongho into playing a game with him in the living room, the entire dorm filled with sounds from the screen and the shouting between the three. Yeosang was curled up in his favorite chair, supposedly working for a project coming due in one of his classes, but his eyes hadn't left the other boys in ages. Blue smiled fondly.
Being with the pack felt like coming home. They'd never had much family. Their parents were always busy, away saving lives and solving problems as part of various magic councils, and their grandmother was generally busy with work, though they spent much of their time working together. So, for a long time, it had really just been Blue and Yunho. Having so many other people treat them like they were part of something laid a blanket of belonging around Blue's shoulders, one they wouldn't trade for the world.
As Blue looked around the living room, the only boys unaccounted for were Mingi and Yunho, likely cooped up together in their room like they generally were when Yunho wasn't feeling his best. Blue remembered how jealous they'd been when Mingi first came stumbling into their lives, watching their other half be swooped up in a whirlwind of someone else. But now they were just grateful. Mingi was all too familiar with anxiety, so it was easy for him to help Yunho when Blue was busy.
Yunho was, in fact, curled up against Mingi's frame, their long limbs tangled together. The low, thrumming ache in his bones was really starting to settle in now with less than two days to the full moon, and his moods were becoming unstable which, as always, led to the usually bright natured boy turning into a recluse in fear of hurting one of his pack mates. They never deserved his attitude, and they were always patient with him, but he'd hurt Wooyoung's feelings one too many times to feel comfortable spending time with them in this state.
Mingi ran his fingers through the other boy's hair, picking up easily on the tension that was building in his body.
"Stop thinking so much," Mingi mumbled. Yunho tucked his head under Mingi's chin with a quiet, puppy-like whine, breathing in the familiar strawberries and cream scent that rolled off of him. It was almost sickeningly sweet, all Cupids tended to be, but he didn't mind it in the least. It blended well with the cologne that he wore, turning the sharp edges smooth on Yunho's senses. He toyed with the hem of Mingi's shirt, seeking something to do with his hands.
A knock came at the door, and Mingi granted them entrance with a soft but gruff 'what?'. Yunho buried his face deeper into his chest, pressing himself somehow even closer. But then Blue was there, leaning over the both of them to stroke Yunho's cheek.
"Wanted to check on your guys. I made extra food in case you're hungry." They said, voice soft like silk in the calm air, nearly lulling Yunho into a trance. This was maybe his favorite place to be. "We're gonna watch a movie while everyone eats so maybe Wooyo will settle down. Jongho is antagonizing him again."
Yunho shook his head. The young banshee's shrieks were already too loud in his ears with plenty of space and a closed door between them. He didn't really feel like facing them head on. Neither Blue nor Mingi argued. Blue leaned down, pressing a kiss to the crown of Yunho's head.
"Alright, well, I'll bring some food anyway. Just in case."
They left, and Yunho felt his chest ache as if it were going to cave in at the distance between them. He always got like this, helplessly clingy with Blue - and sort of with Mingi too, but never like he was with Blue. But they'd been there for him since early on, more than anyone else in his life, and it was as if his entire being knew that there was nobody he could trust the way he trusted Blue.
"They worry about you, you know." Mingi said, pulling away enough to look down at Yunho. The werewolf didn't answer, but his brows pulled together as he thought. He didn't like the idea of making them worry, but he knew that much was out of his control. He'd tried his best to act normal, but it was hard when everything was too loud and every touch made his skin crawl, and his bones felt like they were shattering in his body on some nights. But Blue didn't need to worry about him, he told them that time and time again, but they never listened.
"They shouldn't. They know it's going to happen every month," He grumbled, voice still hardly audible in the room.
"But that's never stopped us. I mean, if you're suffering, it makes sense that they want to fix it. Fixing things is what they do. And you're the person that matters the most to them in the world."
The words weighed on his mind. Of course he knew that the two of them were close, and he wouldn't hesitate to say that they were the most important person in the world to him, a part of his own personal pack as far as he was concerned, but it hadn't fully occurred to him that maybe they felt the same way about him.
"What are you thinking about?" Mingi asked. Yunho didn't get a chance to answer because Blue came back then with two plates of food for them, setting them both carefully on Mingi's desk which was pushed up against the wall between their beds.
"Get some rest. I'll check in one more time when I get ready to go home." They reached down, brushing Yunho's hair from his forehead to press another chaste kiss there, and any thought in his mind was immediately silenced. And just like that they were gone, and the sliver of light from the hallway disappeared, and that ache was back again, and every thought in his mind was so loud that it felt like his head would burst.
"I don't know what I'd do without them." He answered after another few moments of quiet. "It hurts so bad when they're not here with me. I don't want to feel that way."
"Then don't be without them."
Mingi leaned down, pressing a short kiss to Yunho's head, right over where Blue had left theirs, before letting him curl up again, holding him close to his chest.
It was several hours later when Seonghwa dragged Hongjoong home for some rest. He was exhausted, and irritable more than anything. His mood swings were worse than Yunho's, and he had a tendency to hyperfocus even more than usual before the full moon, like his mind could only handle one thought at a time. When they got back, he couldn't even bother saying hi to the rest of his pack - and Blue - who were sprawled out around the living room. The scent of a freshly cooked meal still lingered in the dorm, and the noise from the television was enough to give him a headache, so he headed straight for their room with Seonghwa hot on his heels.
Blue didn't give it a second thought until the end of the movie. It was getting late enough that they should leave soon, or crash on the couch which was always an open invitation in the dorm. But, before that, they headed for Seonghwa's room. They knocked on the door lightly, trying not to bother Hongjoong too much while he rested. When the door opened, it seemed they hadn't succeeded, because Hongjoong stood on the other side, his hair tousled as if he'd been asleep, but his eyes were heavy enough that Blue knew he wasn't getting any rest. If he had just a little more patience for them, they'd have been happy to help him remedy that. There were about a million concoctions to help him sleep.
"Really?" He snapped, a growl rumbling in his chest.
"Calm down, Alpha, I'm just here to give this to Seonghwa. I'll be out of your hair in no time." They said, Despite their teasing words, they were gentle with their tone, much like they were trying to soothe a feral puppy.
"I asked them to come, you can let them in." Seonghwa said. Hongjoong's dark gaze stayed on Blue before he was sulking back off to his desk, the several tabs open on his laptop stealing his attention again. Blue closed the door behind them, letting the darkness engulf the room again, aside from the color shifting LED lights casting slow, colorful stretches of light around the room.
"Here," Blue handed him the bottle. "Drink about a shot once a day and we'll see how it works for you. Just text me about any side effects or anything unusual. Or if it doesn't help anything at all. Then we can work on it a little more until it's just right."
Seonghwa smiled, setting the jar of liquid down.
"You're an absolute lifesaver, you know that? There's nobody like you." He told them. Blue laughed, shrugging off the compliment.
"I just do what I can do. But I have class in the morning, and I think your little wolf might be getting sick of me. I'll see you later, yeah?"
Without another word, Blue saw themselves out of the boys' room, closing the door behind them and stopping by to say goodbye to Yunho and Mingi one more time. They were relieved to see the dishes wiped clean of food. They kissed Yunho's cheek, then Mingi's, and said goodnight.
The next day was going on like any other, about a billion notes spread in front of them on their desk as the professor droned on about the magical compounds that formed celestial magic, and the complex history of divination amongst the human world using them. It would have been fascinating if Professor Lim wasn't such a jumbled teacher. But Blue took notes anyway, copying down everything they wrote onto a separate copy for Yunho who was missing class for the next couple of days until he was feeling well again. The full moon was only one sleep away, and the University was always more than accommodating for those with disabilities, magical or otherwise.
It was in the middle of the last class of the day, a more laid back one thankfully, that Blue's phone started buzzing on their desk. They picked it up quickly, silencing the call. Nobody paid it any mind, but being the definition of a picture perfect student that they were, Blue was mortified. They declined the call from Wooyoung, sending a text that they were in class and would call back later. They were granted another couple of minutes of peace before their phone began to buzz again. They huffed, putting down their pen and declining another call from Wooyoung. The third time, they had half a mind to block him, but a glance at their phone stopped them in their tracks.
It was Hongjoong's number this time, their screen lit up with 'whiny wolf' written across it. They froze, mind coming up with about a hundred terrible options for what could be happening. Hongjoong didn't just call to chit-chat with people, least of all with them. Maybe to ask about some stubborn bit of magic he was dealing with, but he was much too proud to ask them for help with that. It had to be Yunho, he had a habit of getting terribly sick before his transformations, too overwhelmed with his pain and anxiety until he'd worked his body up into a tizzy.
They shoved their phone in their pocket, messily gathering their notes and slipping them into their bag. They stood up, chair scraping against the floor, but they didn't care about that as they took the lecture hall steps as fast as they could. Everyone was working on their respective assignments, so it wasn't too much of an interruption as they explained that there was a family emergency to their professor and booked it into the hall.
They pulled their phone out, the device frantically vibrating in their palm all over again. They swiped to accept the call, pressing it to their ear as they walked fast enough that they were almost running.
"Hongjoong, what the hell is going on? I was in class, what happened?" They hissed, though it was hardly angry. Their mind was too full of worst case scenarios to make room for the usual reactions that they saved for him.
"Get over here now. I don't know what you did, but you're dead, do you hear me?" He growled. Blue was somehow left with more questions than answers as the line went dead. But even so, they knew how protective he was over his pack, they remembered the way he'd ripped into one of the older students for trying to take advantage of Yeosang's sweet disposition to use his magic.
So they picked up their pace, running across campus to the pack dorm, then taking the stairs in hopes that it would counter the elevator wait time. By the time they made it to the door they were breathless, chest aching as their heart pounded against the ribcage. They banged on the door, and a moment later Jongho opened it for them.
"Seonghwa-hyung. He's not doing great. Hongjoong-hyung has been flying off the handle all day," He said, closing the door behind them while they kicked their shoes off and immediately started down the hall. Of all the outcomes they'd imagined, they'd never even begun to consider something being wrong with Seonghwa. Maybe they should have grabbed their medical kit on the way, they thought, but they'd been far too frantic to think ahead.
They knocked on the door, barely finishing before it was tanked open. Hongjoong grabbed their wrist, dragging them inside and slamming the door shut behind them.
"What the fuck did you do him?" He asked, backing Blue into the door. They clenched their fists. They knew that fighting him wasn't the answer when he was like this, especially with his transformation coming. He wouldn't hesitate to hurt them. They nudged past him as gently as they could, walking over to the bed where Seonghwa was laying down, skin shining with a light sheen of sweat. They reached out, brushing his dark hair back to lay a hand to his forehead.
"What's wrong with him? He has a fever, what else?" They asked, pulling out their notebook to jot down his condition. "When did all of this start?"
"He hasn't been able to eat, he could barely stand up. He's...he's weak and exhausted." Hongjoong was pacing now as Blue held their hands above the Incubus' head, muttering a soothing spell under their breath and letting the magic seep into him. "It was after he took that fucking potion or whatever it is that you brought. The suppressant or whatever the hell."
"The supplement? Do you know how much he took?" They stood up, brushing their hands off on their thighs and turning to where the jar was sitting on the bedside. It looked like he'd taken what they'd instructed, a problem with the magic then.
"What you told him to. You're gonna fucking kill him." Hongjoong snapped, baring his teeth while his eyes flickered dangerously. "I told him not to trust your shady magic, but he swore up and down that everyone trusted you, that Yunho tried all your shit and he came out fine."
He scoffed, and Blue crossed their arms.
"I know that you're worried about him, but I need you to work with me here. If you want him to get better any time soon, then you need to calm down. Breathe." Their voice was calm, imbued with a light magical air to try and bring him down. They had enough experience with trying to talk down a wild animal.
"Don't tell me to calm down until your mate is dying and you can't do anything about it. You don't get to do that." He said, voice strained and eyes wild when he looked at them. Nevertheless, he took a deep breath, his fists unclenching at his sides and his frantic pacing coming to a halt.
"Has he had anything to drink?" Hongjoong nodded. "And he's not eaten anything, right? When's the last time the two of you had sex?"
Hongjoong growled then, a real one. He took a few menacing steps towards Blue, but they still didn't back down, tilting their chin up.
"I wouldn't ask for my own fun. I need to know. How long's it been?"
"A couple of days."
"He needs to feed. As soon as possible. Has he been responsive today?" They asked, turning back to Seonghwa. His face was scrunched up like he was in pain, quiet sounds of discomfort coming from his lips, albeit weak and barely there. If it weren't for that, they might not even know that he was conscious at all. "Hwa, baby, can you open your eyes for me?"
He blinked a few times, eyes burning red like they did when his Incubus spirit was taking over. Blue stroked his cheek, tilting his head to get a peek at his teeth where his fangs were beginning to form. Another sign that he was slipping into demon form involuntarily, losing his grip on his own being.
"I know this is awful, but just stay with us for a bit, okay? Gonna make you feel better, I promise. Hongjoongie is here too, he's not gonna let anything happen to you." They cooed sweetly, still emitting that barely noticeable soothing spell.
"I don't know what will happen if he doesn't feed," Blue said, looking over their shoulder at Hongjoong. "I haven't treated an Incubus this far gone before."
Before they could process what was happening, Hongjoong had pinned them to the wall, one hand pressed to their throat and the other arm laid against their shoulders. His gaze was burning through them, something barely contained flickering behind his irises, and Blue immediately felt their stomach drop.
"If he dies, you die next. I don't give a single shit what Yunho has to say about it. You won't step foot near my pack ever again." He growled. "I knew I shouldn't have trusted you from the moment I met you."
Blue refused to flinch away, refused to close their eyes, refused to let the odd mixture of emotions burning inside of them set them ablaze. So they stared him down, slowly inhaling through their nose and ignoring the way that Hongjoong's grip around their throat was beginning to make them feel lightheaded.
"If he dies, it's going to be because you're too pissed to help him." They said, trying to sound calm even when their voice came out tight. "You're fighting the wrong battle right now, Hongjoong. Focus."
There was a beat, then another, and Blue swore that their vision was beginning to tunnel before Hongjoong let go. Then his entire body weight pulled away from them, and they collapsed to the floor. The room was spinning as sucked in a deep, ragged breath and immediately lost it again as they coughed. Their fingers curled against the carpet, trying to regain the sense of confidence that they'd had before this.
It was true, if Seonghwa died, it was all their fault. Hell, if Seonghwa died they could have their magic stripped away all together. If Seonghwa died, their entire life was over. The Pack would never forgive them, not even Yunho, and Blue wouldn't forgive themselves either. They needed to stop panicking, they needed to think. Surely Seonghwa feeding would help, but if it didn't help enough, then what the hell came next? Could a professional fix whatever it was that they'd broken? Should they try to call someone for help?
While Blue curled into themselves on the floor, Hongjoong moved to Seonghwa's side, every ounce of aggressive body language melting into something delicate and careful. He leaned down, pressing a slow kiss to Seonghwa's lips before pushing his hands up under Seonghwa's shirt, dragging it up his torso and then guiding him up enough to take it off.
"Joong," Seonghwa whined, and Hongjoong shushed him with another kiss, his tongue dipping into his lover's mouth and tracing against the sharp points of his fangs.
"It's okay, I'm here. We're gonna fix it." Hongjoong promised, moving down to make quick work of Seonghwa's sweatpants, tugging them down and leaving him in his boxers. His hand ghosted up, tracing over the outline of Seonghwa's cock. "See? Gonna take care of you."
Hongjoong sat back, stripping his upper half and silently cursing the fact that he was still turned on in a situation like that when every part of his being should be taken over by worry. But then Seonghwa was reaching out, grabbing for him weakly, his long fingers curling around Hongjoong's wrist and pulling his hand to run down Seonghwa's toned stomach. Hongjoong huffed out a noise, palming his mate's desperate cock over the absolutely useless cotton of his underwear.
"Gotta let me get my pants off, pet. Just hang on, not gonna leave." Hongjoong promised. He shuffled around, pushing the bottom half of his clothes off in a series of swift movements and kicking them aside.
It was the sound of his jeans thudding to the ground that pulled Blue out of the panic in their mind. With wide, shaken eyes they looked up to see the expanse of Hongjoong's bare back, the dip of his waist down to the curve of his completely naked ass, all on display in front of them. They scrambled back, bracing themselves against the wall and dragging themselves up to their feet. The scene in front of them had them breathless all over again, and a terrible blend of disgust and anxiety and searing arousal began pulsing through them.
Hongjoong maneuvered Seonghwa's legs around his waist once the two of them were fully naked, spitting lewdly into his palm and stroking Seonghwa's length. He was already leaking onto his stomach, arching against the bed and whimpering at the slightest touch. Just from jacking him off, Hongjoong was feeling like he'd combust. The heat in the room had to be rising a good few degrees between them.
"Please," Seonghwa keened, the loudest sound he'd managed to make in hours. "Need you to fuck me, need you inside."
"I know pet, it's okay. I will, I promise." Hongjoong swore, leaning down to kiss Seonghwa slowly one more time before sitting back on his heels. He looked over his shoulder to where Blue was pressed so tightly to the wall that they may as well have been trying to fuse with the paint. Hongjoong, however, looked entirely relaxed, not at all bothered by the show he was putting on. "Either make yourself useful for once in your life or get the fuck out. You don't deserve to watch."
Hongjoong's words sank into Blue's mind, blowing the fog and the panicked thoughts out of the way, and they scrambled for the door. They shut it behind them, the sound resonating through the dorm as they pressed their back to it. They closed their eyes, chest heaving as they chased their breath. They hadn't just seen Hongjoong about to fuck Seonghwa, they hadn't gotten horny over it, and they certainly hadn't almost killed Seonghwa with some rogue magic. None of this was real. They'd go home, they'd go back to bed, and when they woke up, this would all have been some freaky nightmare.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" Yunho asked, the door to his room open just enough to reveal him standing there in just his favorite sweatpants, the material slung low on his hips. Not an unusual sight, but hardly one that Blue could handle seeing right then and there. They stared at him, eyes wide and mouth opening and closing as they searched for some sort of excuse for their presence.
"I was...I was just leaving. I should go," They said, heading for the door without another word. They were shoving their feet back into their shoes when Yunho caught up, large hand circling their wrist.
"Hey, are you okay? You look about one wrong move away from a panic attack." He observed. And damn him for being so sweet, and for having those perfect big brown eyes that made them melt. They bit back the fear, and the upset, and the confusion, and plastered a smile on their face.
"No, I'm fine, I'm good. I was just checking on Seonghwa. He didn't feel well. But he's...fine." They managed, albeit unconvincingly. They pulled their hand free. "I'm sorry, Yunnie, but I do gotta go. Sorry, I'll talk to you later? After the moon?"
They didn't give him a chance to answer, letting themselves out and practically leaping down the stairs. The burn of cool fresh air in their lungs couldn't come quickly enough, the sensation sending a chill down their spine and shocking the rest of their reactions out of them. They were still trying to process what had happened inside. Their hands were shaking; Adrenaline, they decided. Their head was hurting too. But one thing was clear to them, they still had to come up with a backup plan in case whatever the fuck they'd just witnessed the beginning of wasn't enough.
Once they were settled back in their dorm, locked behind closed doors and wrapped in their most comforting hoodie, they dropped a text in the dorm group chat to announce that they were working on an important project and couldn't be disturbed for the foreseeable future. If their friends had any questions or concerns, they didn't say anything. But no matter how long they sat there, or how long they stared at their blank sheet of paper, no real solution came into their mind. The tapping of their pen on the desk was steadily driving them crazy, but it was all they could manage to do. The sound rang through their head, echoing over the image of Hongjoong's naked form burned in their mind, and the way he sounded when he talked to Seonghwa. The memory of it was burning hotter than whatever hell they were going to for witnessing it.
They stood up, giving the room a couple of paces back and forth before collapsing onto their bed, palms pressed to their eyes as if it would erase the memory of this entire shitty day.
"Get your shit together," They nearly shouted at themselves, taking a long, deep breath and huffing it back out. They were in for a very long, very difficult night.
Nobody saw Blue for several more days. They were living off the stash of snacks under their bed and the bottled waters that they'd shoved to the back of their closet for events like this. Well, not exactly like this. Most of the time they wouldn't be so worried about the entire world crashing down around them. They'd denied every offer Yunho had made of bringing them takeout, or any requests by their roommates to go out to grab late night snacks with them. They were hardly even sleeping now, too focused on trying to dig their way out of this hole.
Seonghwa had texted, apologizing for the concern as if it was somehow his fault and not theirs. He assured them that other than a heightened hunger, they were doing fine, no signs of starvation or long term effects from the magic. Blue didn't call that fine, especially when he'd sought them out to do just the opposite. They'd been studying until the words blurred together, seeking some sort of reason that this had happened.
It was late into the night, nearly a full week after the incident, and Blue was half asleep, slumped over their notes and ideas, eyes falling shut when their bedroom door opened. They gasped, scrambling to stand up on sleepy legs. But it was just Yunho, the worry on his face bringing a new wave of guilt and exhaustion. They'd not avoided him for this long since they were young, they never went more than a day or two without talking.
"What are you doing here? It's late." They sighed, body nearly giving out as they collapsed back into their desk chair.
"You're avoiding me." Yunho walked closer, pressing a hand to their cheek to check that they weren't feverish. "You look like shit, when's the last time you slept?"
He moved around their room, clearing out some of the snack wrappers and the pile of empty water bottles - or at least trying to limit the mess to one little corner until he had time to properly clean up.
"I don't know. What time is it now?" They asked. Yunho didn't answer that, he knew they didn't really want to know in the first place.
"You need to rest. We can talk about this in the morning. But it's never good news when you coop yourself up in here for this long." He tried not to let out a sigh. At least they'd been eating, that was one less thing for him to fuss over.
"You're not my dad, Yun. I'm fine." They said, but despite their protests they were already standing up, eyelids heavy as they stretched their arms above their head and twisted their back. A series of semi-concerning popping noises followed each move, and Yunho side eyed them. "I'm barely even tired. And I'm sure you came here for something better than telling me to go to bed."
"That's exactly what I came here for. Not the first time." Yunho pulled the blankets on their bed back, nodding for them to get comfortable. They meant it when they said they were barely tired, at least they really thought so. But their spot looked so appealing in the moment, and their entire body was begging to betray them. "Sleep, Bluebell. I mean it."
Blue knew he was serious, he always was when he called them that. No room for teasing or whining.
"Whatever you say," They grumbled, not quite managing to throw in the sarcastic tone they intended. They wiggled their whole body under the blankets, not even managing to stay awake long enough to feel Yunho tuck them in and kiss their cheek.
The second time that Yunho caught Blue's eye, they were outside, a small basket sitting at their side as they picked flowers from the edge of the woods. He peeked his head out of the door to the cabin. He'd been cooped up in his room for ages - which was really just a week or so, but when you're eight or nine that's an eternity - and he'd been itching to catch a glimpse of the other little kid running around.
"Hey," He called. Blue jumped, looking back at him with wide eyes. They gave him a tight lipped smile before turning back to their basket. Yunho didn't like that response very much, so he made his way across the lawn to where they were knelt in the grass. "Your name is Bluebell, right?"
The question made Blue laugh, a pretty giggle rang out like birdsong to match the pretty smile that took up their face. They shook their head.
"No, that's not my name." They said, "Bluebell is a flower."
"But lots of people are named after flowers," Yunho pointed out, his lips downturned into a confused little pout. Blue tipped their head, their little eyebrows furrowed and lips pressed tight. Then they nodded.
"I guess you could name someone Bluebell. What's your name?"
"My name is Yunho."
Their friendship blossomed easily after that, but no matter how many times Blue argued about the name, it stuck around. To Yunho, calling them something unique was his way of showing them that they were special, a little inside joke to remind both of them that even if a nickname was something anyone could use, nobody would have the bond that they did. It stayed that way forever, them being his Blue, and even when it caught on with other people, the nickname reminded them of that little boy that they spent all their time protecting. The one who grew up all alone with the wood nymphs and the moon, the one who would walk them to and from school day after day every year. The boy that stayed by their side even when he was sick of them wanting to study magic instead of playing games with him. Blue knew all the way back then that they had no intention of living without him.
Yunho barely slept that night, he was too worried about making sure that they were okay. Blue always took care of him, and he figured he had to repay them for that every now and then. He took time to tidy up their room, or sometimes wash a load or two of their laundry. The sun was already peeking over the horizon when he crawled into bed with them, pulling them tight to his side and falling asleep to the sound of their gentle snoring.
It was afternoon when Blue woke up to Yunho stretching beside them. They groaned, rubbing at their eyes and curling deeper into the blankets. They were still so tired, but their stomach was starting to ache with hunger, and they probably needed to use the restroom, but both of those things meant getting out from the warm embrace of their bed. Yunho reached down, stroking their cheek gently, and they blinked up at him.
When he looked at them like that, it felt like the entire world stopped spinning, leaving them a little off-kilter. It was the softest gaze, the one that he always saved just for them. He smiled, pinching their cheek before moving his hand entirely.
"Good morning, sleepyhead. How do you feel?" He asked. They didn't answer, just curling closer to him so they could rest their head on his chest. He didn't push it, sliding an arm around them and letting them soak up his body heat.
"I'm sorry you had to take care of me," They said after a while. He shook his head.
"You don't ever have to apologize for that. I'm always gonna take care of you. I promise you that."
They looked up, their faces a little too close, and their hearts both beating in time, just a little too fast now. Blue nipped at their bottom lip, fingers twisting and tugging at the fabric of his shirt. The moment was stretching out, becoming a little too intimate. They pulled themselves away.
"But you have enough on your plate. You shouldn't have to worry about me too."
"I'm going to worry about you. Stop thinking about it." He said, hand coming back to stroke their face again. Blue frowned. "You're my number one priority, so stop trying to argue with me. If you're gonna be reckless, someone has to take care of you, and it's gonna be me. No fighting me about it, yeah? You'll just make it more difficult."
The words carried a sense of finality about them, and even though they wanted to argue, part of Blue was aching to be taken care of just like this. So they nodded, and laid their head back down. It was quiet for a long time, several minutes dragging out until it felt like a century of peace passed between the two of them. And finally, after a long while, Yunho spoke up.
"What had you working so hard that you wouldn't answer my calls?"
Blue didn't answer right away, thinking back to the fight with Hongjoong, to the sight of Seonghwa laying there, pale and weak. To the sight of the two of them naked, the way that Hongjoong spoke and moved with such gentle certainty, the way it had awoken something downright forbidden in them.
"Seonghwa was sick. My supplement didn't work, it made things harder. I'm trying to fix it." They answered quietly. Yunho sighed. He could hear the guilt in their words, the way they put all of the blame on their shoulders.
"It's not your fault. You wouldn't have given it to him if you thought you'd hurt him." He reminded them, nudging Blue so that he could sit up and face them. They pushed themselves to sit up, but they didn't look back.
"I know. But it hurt him anyway, and it didn't even solve his problem in the first place. He came here for a solution, and he came here because he trusted me. I don't even know if he'd accept my help again. Or if he should. But I feel like I have to try, I have to do something. It was...awful. I've never had anything backfire like that before, this is supposed to be easy for me. I could have killed him, Yunho."
"Blue,"
"And I know that I'm probably being reckless. I mean, I never actually thought that much about it before. I didn't think my magic would ever hurt someone. I didn't even know that I was capable of that, and I can barely even stomach doing magic anymore. It feels awful."
"Blue."
"Like, I always try so hard to make sure that everything I'm doing is safe and ethical, and I do all of this research, but I'd never even considered that by doing unregulated research and testing, by allowing innocent people to use my magic, that I could be killing people. I mean, I haven't. But I could"
"Bluebell. Look at me." Yunho snapped. Blue looked up, eyes brimming with tears. Yunho made a soft, wounded sound. He shook his head, dragging them into a hug and rocking them both back and forth. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's okay, I promise. He's okay, and so are you. Just breathe. You're not gonna figure anything out when you're panicking like this. Relax."
Blue closed their eyes, pushing down the wave of tears that were trying to fall, inhaling Yunho's scent, that faint, woody smell of mint, and pine, and fresh morning air. They were so tired, tired of being angry with themselves, and tired of pushing their limits, of trying to meet everyone's expectations. 
"Yunho, I'm so tired," They said, and their voice gave away exactly what they meant. He held them tighter as if hugging them could squeeze all of the negative feelings wrapped up in them back out.
"I'm here. You can rest with me, I've got you now." He promised them. He stroked their hair, tracing their cheek. His touch was gentle, always so careful like they'd shatter into a million pieces if he wasn't. And, for once, Blue really felt like they just might. They leaned into his palm, soaking up his warmth and the calloused touch of his skin.
"What would I do without you?"
"We don't have to worry about that," Yunho laughed. "I'm not going anywhere. You've helped me through my hard times, so it's my turn, right?"
"Can we go to the Noodle Shop?" Blue asked after another long bout of silence. Yunho nodded, mostly just delighted that they'd suggested eating without his prompting. "Let me clean up a little."
Blue stood up, stretching the tension out of their shoulders and heading for the bathroom. They stared in the mirror there, examining their reflection. It was hard to see the differences from how they usually looked, the bags under their eyes and the crease between their brows that hadn't left for a day or more. But they knew regardless that this wasn't how they wanted people to see them. Sure, they'd allowed themselves a moment of relaxation, but that didn't mean they were going to let everyone see behind the curtain.
A quick shower later, they were digging through their closet, pulling on their favorite pair of jeans and one of Yunho's old hoodies. The whole time, he was waiting patiently, the picture of reliability, and for a moment Blue wondered who they had pleased in a past life to deserve someone like him.
Yunho had been a werewolf for years now. They were both grown into teenagers, and somehow the feeling of self loathing that came with every transition never faded away. It had been two days since his last transformation, and he should have gone back to Blue's house by now. He should have checked in, he knew that they'd come looking for him otherwise, but he couldn't find it in him to leave his den.
Waking up after the moon left him with an ache in his bones and a heavy feeling of confusion that he couldn't manage to shake off. What was worse was the blood staining his hands this time around. It wasn't his, he'd checked everywhere. It was staining his clothes too, and he'd scrubbed himself as clean as he could before changing into a clean set. He'd never had this problem before, half the time he wasn't even sure that he left the den. But now he'd hurt something, maybe someone, and the idea of facing anyone after that, after knowing that he wasn't fully in control, that he'd always be a threat, he couldn't stomach that.
It was evening when Blue came out to find him. It was dangerous for them to be that deep in the woods alone, especially so late, but that didn't stop them from seeking Yunho out.
"Yunho," They called from outside, not willing to encroach on his space. He flinched at the sound of their voice, and even though everything in him wanted to hide away more, to dig himself in deeper and not look them in the eye, he couldn't leave them out there all by themselves as the sun went down.
"You shouldn't be out here," He said, running a hand through his hair. His skin felt different now, like it was stained so deep that scrubbing off the evidence wasn't enough, but maybe that was in his head. Blue took his words as an invitation to duck into the small opening of his home. It was clear to them immediately even in the dim lighting of his lanterns, that he hadn't slept well the past two nights.
"You shouldn't either. You didn't come home, I thought something happened to you." They reached out, grabbing his wrist and tugging him this way and that, diligently checking to make sure that he wasn't injured anywhere.
"I'm fine. You should go back." He said, pulling his arm back and shrinking into himself. Blue narrowed their eyes at him.
"Not without you. What's going on with you?" They asked him, their voice harsh and making it unbearably clear that they were hurt. The way they looked at him, however, betrayed the undercurrent of concern that ran through them.
"Nothing."
"Don't you lie to me, Jeong Yunho. I know you better than you know yourself." They snapped, and Yunho looked at them with big brown eyes that were all too quick to fill with tears. Immediately the harshness that Blue had shown was gone as they rushed closer, reaching up with gentle hands to cradle his face. "Hey, hey, you're okay. What's the matter? Don't cry."
"I'm a monster. You aren't safe with me, nobody is. I'm dangerous." He sobbed, tears streaming in torrents down his face. Blue had no idea what to do, they'd never seen Yunho break down like this. Not the day he came home to them, or when he'd confirmed that his parents were gone, or even after his first full transformation. For as long as they could remember, he'd been their rock, their ray of sunshine. He was supposed to be all bright smiles and contagious laughter. It was devastating to see him fall apart in their hands.
"Don't say that. You're no monster." They said, using the sleeve of their hoodie to gently dab away his tears. "Look at me. You're perfect. You'd never hurt a fly, let alone a person. You're a good person."
"There was blood. I did something, and I don't even know what it was. I couldn't have stopped it." His entire body was shaking with his sobs now, his hands clutching desperately at the hem of Blue's hoodie like he was scared that his confession would drive them away from him.
"You don't know what happened, Yunho, that wasn't you. Maybe you were defending yourself. You wouldn't do anything like that if you were in control. That doesn't make you a monster." They promised, pulling him in until his frame melted against theirs, face tucked into the crook of their neck.
Yunho had never felt like this before, so vulnerable and broken yet so wholeheartedly safe. It was like having Blue with him was enough to dull the pain, the insecurity. They would do anything to keep him from believing the worst about himself.
"I'm scared," He whispered. They shushed him gently, stroking their fingers through his hair and trying to avoid the knots from his lack of a shower since the moon.
"I know. But you're not alone. I promise."
The living room of the Pack dorm was always crowded on study night with Blue. It was one of the only ways that they could get some of the members to actually sit down and face doing their work instead of complaining about not understanding. It wasn't that they didn't get it, but Blue found that they had a tendency to psych themselves out. Thankfully, the pack had discovered that they had a way with poking and prodding at the boys until they were right where they should be, until everything made sense. And, best of all, they managed to make sure everyone came out of things feeling confident.
This one was a special study session, partially because midterm exams were coming up, and Seonghwa had managed to coax Hongjoong out of his room, though he wasn't exactly a part of anything. He had his headphones clamped firmly over his ears and his laptop propped on the arm of the chair he was in, working on some music project from the looks of it, but he wasn't hesitating to send burning glares towards Blue every now and then.
Blue was sitting on the floor in front of the couch where Yunho and Jongho were working on a project together, something about the history of demonic bonds and trades with the human race, Blue wasn't entirely sure. Across the coffee table from them, Yeosang was typing away at his computer, and Seonghwa was sitting behind him, taking notes from his Fae Literature textbook. He was doing significantly better than the last time that they'd been over, and he didn't seem upset about the issue with their work in the least. That alone helped to ease their worries.
"Blue," Wooyoung whined, head dropping on Blue's shoulder. They reached up and tousled his dark waves. He was sitting on their right, San on their left. Only Mingi was missing since he was off working on a group project.
"Yes, Wooyoungie?" They asked, leaning over to look at the sheet of problems he was working through. They gently pushed his head back towards his work. "Finish two more before you take a break. I know you can do these two."
They doodled a little star by each of the problems they pointed out before giving Wooyoung a little kiss on the cheek. Yunho smiled, watching for a moment before turning his attention back to Jongho. It was comforting how easily the two parts of his family fit together.
It was then that Hongjoong took his headphones off and got up to grab a snack from the kitchen cupboard. He would have much rather stayed cooped up in his room until Blue left or fell asleep. But he guessed this past few weeks had been getting to him, and trying to leave Seonghwa unattended in their presence was too much to ask of himself.
There was a sort of reliance that his pack had on him. It was his job to lead them, to sort out their issues and make them feel safe and at home. He'd been the one to bring them all together. Yunho had been his first pack member, and Hongjoong had never felt quite as comfortable as he had once he'd found him. Unlike Yunho, Hongjoong had been born to a wolf pack. He knew what it felt like to belong, but once he was old enough to go on his own, he'd lost that bond. Yunho helped him bring it back.
He hadn't expected to pick up the others, the non-wolves, but he knew what that bond was supposed to feel like and he'd be damned if anyone took them from him. It was his nature that drew him to his pack, they all fit together like pieces of a puzzle, creating something so natural that it almost felt like magic. They belonged together. So he couldn't entirely understand the connection that all of them had with Blue. And sure, he guessed that it made sense to an extent, the relationship that Yunho had with them went far beyond friendship, even if the younger wolf wasn't fully aware of that, and maybe it could be natural for Yunho's packmates to feel some type of bond with his chosen one too, but for Hongjoong it just felt wrong; The feeling he got around Blue was too hot, too sharp, too all-consuming, and he couldn't decipher it. It felt like the world was punishing him for something that he couldn't begin to figure out.
He watched the way that San asked Blue about his homework, and the way that they diligently explained the concepts to him and emphasized them with a reassuring pat on his shoulder. They were so patient, even with Wooyoung clinging to their side, pouting and whining about how he'd never be able to understand Applied Magic in Mathematics (which Hongjoong couldn't really fault him for, that shit made no sense. How could there be an entire course on the rules of exceptions?) Every time that Blue was in his dorm, surrounded by his pack, it was like they belonged there, and no part of him was willing to accept that.
"Joong," Seonghwa called, and Hongjoong looked up from the bag of chips he was opening. "What have you been working on?"
See, the thing about Seonghwa was that Hongjoong could hardly ever say no to him. He insisted it was something to do with the demon's magic. Seonghwa, however, insisted that his magic didn't work that way and Hongjoong was just down horrendously bad. The pack tended to agree. He tensed for a moment now that everyone was turning their attention to him. He tried to calm down, to let the familiarity of his home and his pack distract him from all the frustration he was harboring.
He walked back over and slotted himself in between Seonghwa and Yeosang, offering to share his snack. Blue flashed him a look, eyes wide. They hadn't seen each other since the incident, and when Hongjoong met their eye, there was something unfamiliar in them, something that put Blue on edge. They shifted in their seat, looking between him and Hwa. Hongjoong didn't relish in their discomfort, but he wouldn't say that he wasn't at least a little pleased to see that he still held some power. Was it so wrong to want an intruder in his home to feel threatened?
"Have you been working on your songs all day, hyung?" Wooyoung asked, putting down his pencil and disregarding the work he'd been doing. Hongjoong nodded, and Seonghwa half sighed, reaching a hand up to rub the back of Hongjoong's neck. He wasn't usually a fan of affection like this in front of others, but with how tight his shoulders were getting, he let himself melt into it a little more than usual.
"You shouldn't work so hard." Seonghwa scolded him, but Hongjoong only grumbled in response and rolled his eyes. He'd sat through this lecture enough times.
Hongjoong had come to the University to study multicultural music and magic tech, so he often spent his time writing and producing music for use in various areas of magic. Honestly, Blue found it sort of inspiring. 
"Can we hear it?" Yunho asked. Everyone knew that Hongjoong was protective over his magic, working on it tirelessly and insisting that nothing was ever good enough. Though his grades in all of his classes implied otherwise.
"It's not done yet," He answered, reaching for a few chips. "Maybe once it's finished."
"You never think your songs are finished," Jongho pointed out, looking up from his laptop. Hongjoong glared at the Hellhound, but he just laughed and went back to his work.
"Can we at least hear a demo?" Yunho asked. For a moment Hongjoong regretted even letting them know he was working on something at all. They always got like this, so nosy and supportive that it was mildly suffocating. But he couldn't really be mad that people cared about him, that was more than a lot of people in the world. He was lucky to have them, he knew that. He stretched to grab his laptop, opening up a file with his demos in it and started one up.
It was good, everyone knew it would be. They were honored to be one of the only people outside of the pack to get to hear Hongjoong's songs like this, and hear how they grew from beginning to end. They could feel the magic weaved into each track, the careful use of incantations in the lyrics and the power each instrument held in the overarching sound. It amazed them, and they had yet to dislike a single track.
"It's really good. Is that the one you're still working on?" Wooyoung asked, a grin lighting up his face. Hongjoong nodded, closing his laptop and setting it aside.
"I really like it. It sounds a lot like your older stuff, I think. Better than the last one." San added.
A couple of the boys laughed, and Blue nearly snorted. Everyone had listened to San complain for ages about having to hear Hongjoong's last track a hundred and one times. His own fault for asking to help with it. Now even hearing the title of the song made him throw a hissy fit.
"The last one was good!" Hongjoong argued, a growl reverberating in his chest.
"I loved the last one." Blue shrugged. Hongjoong's eyes were on them as they continued. "I will forever and always be a Desire supremacist. I'm San's worst nightmare."
San immediately started whining, but Hongjoong just stood up. He was honestly a little shaken at being addressed so casually, so gently by Blue. He didn't really think of them as friends, but they were still so kind to him and, in truth, it sort of pissed him off.
"I'm going to work in my room." He said, gathering his things to leave. His chest was aching with how hard his heart was pounding in his chest. With the door closed behind him, firmly separating him and the rest of the world, he pressed his palm over his chest.
He knew that he was the asshole in this situation, and part of him really did want to feel bad because, somehow, the worst part of everything was that there was nothing wrong with Blue. They were a good person, maybe too good, and they took amazing care of Yunho, of his entire pack, and he hated that. They'd never been mean to him, at least no more than he deserved, but being around them aggravated him in ways that he couldn't begin to explain.
He thought back to the day he'd been taking care of Seonghwa, the way that his mate had been fading so fast he couldn't even think properly. He didn't know that Wooyoung had called Blue before he did, but he remembered the way that his hands shook when he finally called them, the way his wolf was screaming to take over. He hadn't felt that out of control in a long time, just so goddamn helpless. He needed to protect Seonghwa, his pack was one of the only things that had ever really mattered to him, and his pride had been ripped to shreds when the only thing that he could think to do was call someone else. To call Blue of all fucking people. But they'd come, of course they had. They'd come running the second he called because that's what they did. In some fucked up way, Hongjoong was very much aware that he and Blue weren't so different after all.
"You're being an idiot." Hongjoong snapped, whirling around to look at Seonghwa. Honestly, he knew this conversation was coming and that only made him more sick of it. It was later the same day when Seonghwa mentioned wanting to work with Blue on his supplement again. He wasn't generally one to turn on Seonghwa, but there was one thing that he couldn't tolerate and it was watching his mate put his safety on the line.
Seonghwa didn't even flinch at his outburst. Honestly, he'd seen it coming. He knew Hongjoong, knew his body language. The Incubus frowned, crossing his arms across his chest. He straightened up in his spot, sitting at the edge of their shared bed.
"I appreciate your input, but it isn't up for debate." He responded. Hongjoong growled, beginning to pace the room again. Seonghwa hated seeing him stressed out like this.
"You could have died. You said yourself that you'd never been that close to losing yourself before." Hongjoong said. His voice was sharp around the edges as he thought back to that day again. Honestly, he hadn't stopped thinking about it. It haunted him, watching Seonghwa barely able to speak. If he'd waited just a little longer to call for help, he might have lost him altogether, lost an entire piece of his soul. Fuck, he'd had to call for help in the first place and that was all Blue's fault. His job was to take care of Seonghwa, of all of them, and he had never had a problem doing so before then, so clearly the issue wasn't him. It couldn't be.
"But I didn't. You can't blame them because I had an adverse reaction to some magic. It's like an allergy, how could they have known?" Seonghwa tried to reason. "I want to solve this problem, and nobody has been able to help me. If they might be able to, then I want them to try."
"Why them? You could ask anyone."
"Because I trust them."
"I don't."
"But Yunho does. Everyone else does."
"Then maybe they're all idiots, too. Maybe you're all being stupid." Hongjoong was losing this fight, he knew that. He generally lost fights with Seonghwa. Unlike the demon, he was quick to anger and slow to cool down. Seonghwa didn't answer that, he didn't need to. Hongjoong took a moment to breathe. "I don't understand what you all love about them so much. I don't get it. The entire pack is obsessed with them, and Yunho trusts them with his life. More than he trusts anyone, even Mingi."
"They've been there for him longer than you have. You have to accept that we'll never really know what the two of them have been through. And you have to accept that he's imprinted on them, you can't change that. We should just be grateful that they take such good care of him."
Seonghwa stood up, tentatively stepping towards his mate as if he were a cornered animal. Hongjoong was quiet, defeated. He let Seonghwa take his hand, the warmth reminding him of who he was talking to. He closed his eyes and let out a long sigh.
"I am grateful. That's not it."
"Then what is it? They're good for everyone. That's all you've ever cared about with other people. Everyone gets along with them, and they're always willing to help."
Hongjoong wished beyond all wishing that any of these things made it easier for him. Not all wishes come true, though, and he was being made very aware of that.
"I don't know. Can we just forget it? If anything happens to you again, though, you're not doing this anymore. I'm not going to let them experiment with some bullshit magic until they do something that they can't fix."
Seonghwa nodded, less of an agreement and more of a show of surrender for the time being. The conversation was less than productive now, so surely it could wait for a better time. He knew well that there was no use in talking to Hongjoong when he was feeling threatened.
The fight was inevitable, and it had tensions high in the dorm even if nobody else knew what was happening. Yunho had taken to spending even more of his time outside of classes at Blue's place, and Wooyoung was spending more time with his other friends than usual. The only member particularly willing to withstand Hongjoong's terrible attitude was Jongho, but the Hellhound was built to withstand much worse than a moody werewolf.
However, after a few days of bickering and brooding, Hongjoong decided that the best way to handle things was confronting his problem head on. He knocked on Blue's front door, waiting impatiently for them to answer. When they didn't show their face quickly enough, he banged on it louder. When they did whip the door open, they looked exhausted, and Hongjoong had to will himself not to ask them if they were okay. He clenched his jaw, and Blue rolled their eyes.
"What is it now? I'm busy." But they were nicer than Hongjoong in the long run, everyone knew that. As they retreated back into their dorm, they left the door open for him to follow if he so desired. He didn't exactly, desire that is, but he followed them anyway. He closed the door behind him, growing somehow more frustrated that they were hardly paying attention to him at all.
"I came to talk to you about your little project with Seonghwa." He said.
They stopped, turning back to look at him. They looked significantly more worried now, which eased his mind more than he wanted it to. At least they cared enough to worry about him, that reassured him, but not enough to lay down his arms.
"Is he doing okay?"
"I want you to stay away from him. From all of my pack." Hongjoong said, crossing his arms over his chest. The wait that his body sank into such a confident gait pissed Blue off, maybe even more than his words themselves.
"And who exactly do you think you are to tell me who I can and cannot spend my time with?" They asked, eyes narrowing in his direction.
"I'm the head of their pack." He answered as if it were obvious. Blue stepped towards them in two long strides.
"And as the leader of their pack, it's your job to take care of them. Not control them."
"I am taking care of them."
"Really? Because to me it looks like you're taking care of your own fragile ego. You're afraid that if anyone else is nice to them they'll realize how shitty you've been. And you just couldn't live with yourself then. I don't know how they put up with this bullshit. Go tell them to stay away from me, but I don't have to listen to a damn word you say." Blue snapped, their rage and frustration radiating off of them, a stifling wave of heat.
"You watch your fucking mouth." Hongjoong growled. Before he even finished speaking, he had Blue against the wall again, just like they'd been before. His face was dangerously close now, teeth bared and fangs sharpening before Blue's eyes. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. They're my pack, that has nothing to do with you."
"You're just mad because I had him first." Blue said, voice shockingly smooth despite the wincing pain in their back from the collision with the wall. Hongjoong faltered, his snarl dropped for a second to give way to complete shock at their statement, then his eyes were blazing even hotter with unspoken emotion, things he'd never even considered before this.
"Shut your mouth before I shut it for you," He warned. He pressed closer, too close. He could feel Blue's body heat radiating off of them, making the tiny bit of space between them feel like it was scorching. He didn't flinch, neither did they.
"If you think your empty threats and your stupid attitude scare me, you'd better think again. I stopped being afraid of you a long time ago, Kim Hongjoong."
If it weren't for the slightly soured notes of their scent, and the way that Hongjoong could feel their pulse under his touch, he probably would have believed them. They were good at this, the acting bit, the pretending that they weren't being consumed by this the way that he was. Hongjoong didn't like that. He wanted to hear what they really thought, wanted them to give in, to cave under the pressure.
"Get off of me."
"Stay away from my pack."
"What are you gonna do if I don't? Kill me? Lock them in a fucking cage? Or just come here to push me around and threaten me some more?" They spat back. Hongjoong flinched, his weight slowly easing off of them. But they didn't move, and the tiny bit of space between them didn't grow any wider. They just looked at each other, angry and burning and so alive.
Neither of them knew exactly who kissed the other first, but Hongjoong wouldn't be surprised if it was him. But it didn't matter with the way that Blue's hands were in his hair, pulling him closer, opening their mouth to let him in as he crowded them against the wall. The hands that had been pinning them in place slid down to their waist, dragging them into him until their fronts were pushed flush against each other.
He pulled away only when his lungs began to burn, firmly tipping their chin up to nose along their neck. He dragged his fangs over the soft, clear skin there, down to the crook of their neck. He breathed them in. Blackberry, vanilla, sweet honeyed musk. Familiar and infuriating and fucking intoxicating. He growled. His hands slid under their shirt, forcing it out of his way to feel along the expanse of warm skin under his palms.
"Hongjoong," They breathed out, the sound clipped off by a throaty moan when he bit harshly against their shoulder, just the tiniest pinpricks through their skin. His tongue dragged over the spot, soothing it. That would certainly leave a mark. Hearing his name like that, a prayer on his lips, it was a drug he needed more of.
"Bedroom." He pulled them away from the wall and spun them towards the bedrooms. They led the way, opening their bedroom door and pushing him inside. They were kissing again before the door was fully closed, only ever pulling apart enough to tug their clothes off, discarding their shirts one and then the other until they could explore the fully bared territory of each others upper bodies.
Hongjoong pushed them onto the bed, maybe harder than necessary, but they didn't complain even with their gasp and stunted cry of surprise when their back bounced against the mattress. He lingered over them, tugging their pants off with a couple of harsh pulls, leaving them so close to naked beneath him.
There was a sick sense of pride that felt like ice spreading in his chest - foreign, and sharp, and almost unwelcome - as he looked down at them. He got them like this first. He was in control. Not Blue, not Yunho, or Seonghwa, or anyone else in his fucking life. Just him. He was coming out on top. He had conquered.
He slotted himself between their thighs, kissing them again. Each kiss was hungrier than the last, not as calculated as he would have been under different circumstances. Their teeth clashed, and they nipped at the skin of each other's lips, the mix of tongue, and spit, and huffed out whines should have been borderline disgusting, but neither of them could get enough of it. Hongjoong sat back, and Blue propped themselves on an elbow to chase him until he was out of reach.
His hands slid up their front, finding their nipples and circling his thumbs around them. He started slow before he progressed to toying with them harshly with both hands, tugging and twisting hard enough the Blue's hand flew to one of his wrists. He knocked their hand away, leaning down to soothe the sting with his tongue. He suckled one nipple, then the other, teasing his fangs against it and reveling in the way they whined for him.
"Hongjoong, please." They gasped, nails digging into the flesh of his forearms, leaving pretty little crescent moons against his skin.
"Please, what?" He asked, lips quirking into a smirk that sent another wave of arousal through Blue's body. They huffed, and Hongjoong sat up, shifting so his hips were pressed flush against theirs. He was hard, painfully so, and the friction between the two of them was more of a tease than it was any sort of relief.
"Fuck me," Blue said, but they weren't begging, not really demanding either. Still, Hongjoong was too worked up to argue. The anger was bleeding into arousal and leaving his mind foggy and locked in on nothing but feeling Blue wrapped around him, on watching them fall apart just for him.
Blue reached into the drawer beside them, pulling out a bottle of lube and tossing it to them with a challenging glint in their eye. Hongjoong stared back, not wanting to give in to anything they offered him, but that urge was hardly enough to stop him.
So he shucked off his bottom layers, leaving him completely naked and all too comfortable with being exposed in front of Blue. They weren't complaining, their eyes following the planes of his toned stomach, the muscle of his thighs, all leading them to the pretty cock sitting between his legs.
While Hongjoong popped the cap of the lube and coated his length with it, Blue wiggled out of their underwear so the two of them were back on even ground. Hongjoong settled on the bed on his knees, tugging at Blue's hip hard enough to half force them to flip onto their front. He slapped their ass, the sound resonating in the room.
"Ass up," He ordered. They listened without hesitation, lifting themselves up onto their knees to present themselves for him, back arched so prettily beneath him. He smoothed one of his hands along their back, the other spreading them open to watch the way their hole clenched around nothing at the lightest touch. He spanked them again, and again, and a few more times after that until they were practically panting into their pillows, leaking arousal like a bitch in heat.
He didn't give them any proper warning, just the feeling of his cock lining up with their hole before he started to bully his way inside of them. He wasn't terribly big, but he was usually a kind lover anyway. If it hadn't been Blue, he would have stretched them open, maybe gone down on them for a while if he was feeling patient, but he was burning much too hot with need to care about that. He needed this, needed to fuck them into the mattress until they couldn't walk, or talk, or think about anything or anyone but him. Him and his dick splitting them open.
Underneath the heavy roll of his hips, Blue whined, feeling him fill them up inch by inch. The stretch ached a little, stinging as he finally laid his hips flush with their ass. Their fingers dug into the comforter on their bed, trying to ground themselves as he immediately pulled back, not giving them a chance to adjust to the feeling.
"Fucking look at you, sucking me in so good," He hissed, hands kneading their ass, spreading them open to watch the way they swallowed his dick, how they opened up just for him. The thought had him going absolutely insane. All he could think about was how warm they felt around him, how he could smell them so much stronger like this. "So tight, s'like you're choking my dick."
His words were strained as he fought to keep up the brutal pace he'd started. Blue buried their face in the bed, muffling the moans and cries that he was dragging out of them with every drag of his dick against their sweet spot. Hongjoong, however, was having none of that. He curled his fingers into their hair, tugging at it hard enough to have them pushing themselves up on their hands, back arching harder and neck curving back. Without something to stop it, the incoherent string of curses and moans filled the air of their room, and Hongjoong soaked it all up.
His hand slid out of their hair, around to wrap around their throat. He wasn't choking them, just reminding them that he could, holding them and pulling them closer to him until their fingertips were barely brushing the bed. He leaned down, his chest pressing into their back and his nose brushing against their jaw. He inhaled, their scents mixing in the room and being weighed down by the musk of sex. He was scenting them, letting himself sink into their skin, claiming them even just for a while. He growled, nipping at the skin of the neck and earning another sharp yelp.
"Needed me so bad, didn't you? Wanted me to fill you up so bad that you just couldn't act right." He hissed, letting their body collapse against the bed again. "That's okay, I can fuck the attitude out of you."
They pressed back into each thrust, fucking themselves onto him even with their thighs starting to shake from the exertion.
"So deep, Joong, please." They buried their face against their arms, too lost in the feeling of their building orgasm to feel any sort of way about what either one of them were saying.
"I know, gonna fuck you so good. Make you all mine. You're just gonna come crawling back for more, aren't you? Gonna beg me to fuck you dumb again." Hongjoong could feel his own control slipping, his grasp on whatever sanity he'd come into this with was gone. He couldn't think, could only listen to the way they chanted his name and the way it sent shockwaves through him.
"Gonna cum," They warned him, but he could already tell with the way they were squeezing him. He gripped their hips tighter, squeezing until his fingerprints were bruised into their soft skin, fucking them until they were nearly crying. He poured his entire soul into fucking them so good that maybe he wouldn't be able to stay angry with them, so hard that maybe they'd realize that this wasn't a fucking game. His knot was swelling, and he probably should have thought about that first as he willed himself to hang in a little longer even when he was so goddamn close.
Blue's high shook their body, making their knees go weak under them as they clung to their pillow like a lifeline. One of their hands flew back to find Hongjoong's over their hip, fingers bumping and linking together as they used him to ground them through it. Every thrust pulled and stretched them in a way that made their vision blur.
Then Hongjoong was pulling out, stroking himself to completion and shooting against their thighs. His orgasm seemed to last forever, so intense and yet not enough. The urge to have them stuck on his cock was strong enough to feel like the earth was tilting on its axis. He swallowed it down, looking at Blue as they relaxed against their bed.
Hongjoong stood up, trying to figure out what sort of fucked up blend of pity and pride was spinning through him. Blue looked tired, or maybe just disinterested in the situation, but that idea made his chest hurt, so he avoided it. He didn't want to think about them at all, or the fact that he'd just had sex with them when that was the last thing he had planned on doing, the last thing he should have done. Especially when he'd just said he never wanted to see them again.
"You can leave now." Blue said, finally pushing themselves to stand up. His cum was still dripping down their legs, and he was trying so hard to stay sane with that visual right in front of him. But they were acting like it was nothing, like they weren't still naked, and marked up, and covered in him. As if their legs weren't visibly shaking under their body weight when Hongjoong could see every sign of what had happened between them. "And you can take your demands with you. If I help Seonghwa is up to him, you can take that up with him at home. As for the rest of them, they have a right to choose who they want to spend their time with. I won't take that away from them, you shouldn't either."
They grabbed something from the laundry, wiping themselves clean before tossing it back. Hongjoong followed their lead, pulling his clothes back on in a hurry. By the time he was slipping into his jeans, they were fully clothed and heading for the bathroom.
"Oh, and Hongjoong?" He looked up at them, noting the cold look in their eye. "Don't come back. You have no business with me."
They closed the door, leaving Hongjoong in their room, the air heavy with the two of them, and his heart sinking so low into his stomach that he felt like he was gonna throw up. What the hell had he just done?
Once Blue cleaned themselves up and made sure that any traces of Hongjoong's presence were gone, they weren't actually sure what to do with themselves. They had never really considered doing something like that with Hongjoong, maybe because he hated their guts. But it was good, they'd be lying if they said they wouldn't be thinking about it in their own time. But now they weren't sure they could show their face at the pack dorm again, or anywhere that Hongjoong might be, actually. Maybe he'd gotten his way and they'd never see any of his pack ever again, because maybe it would be better if they just didn't leave their room. Ever. For any reason.
They didn't realize how long they'd spent pondering their impulsive decisions until Yunho was knocking on their bedroom door. they'd forgotten they'd promised him a movie night to celebrate the end of exams. They froze for a moment until he knocked again.
They stood up, smoothing their hair once more and trying to calm themselves down. Yunho was good at noticing when something was going on in their head, and they really weren't sure how talking to him about this situation would go. Not until they determined what the hell it meant and if it was going to happen again, if it changed anything whatsoever about their confusing ass feelings that they were trying to choke down. They huffed out a broken laugh.
"Blue, lemme in! I can hear you, you know." Yunho whined from outside the door. They finally twisted open the door handle, letting him and the takeout he'd brought into the room. But YUnho didn't move, just looked at them for a concerningly long moment with a slowly growing look of confusion. Blue wondered for a second if maybe he'd developed some sort of mind reading ability because he was certainly searching their eyes for something. Finally he stepped into their room, setting the bag of food on their desk and looking around with narrowed eyes.
"What is going on with you?" Blue asked, trying not to act suspicious. They started opening the bag of food to unpack everything.
Yunho could tell something was off, Blue could see it in the tension in his shoulders, and the way he didn't immediately throw himself onto their bed, in the way that he seemed to be avoiding looking at them now when he'd been practically burning holes into them a moment prior.
"Where is he?" Yunho asked. And when he looked at Blue, it was with an expression they hadn't ever seen on him before. His eyes were dark and weighed heavily as he moved closer. They took a step back for every move forward he made, trying to maintain the distance between them, but his legs were longer, and he was clearly not looking to let them escape. "Did he leave? Did he fucking touch you?"
"Yun, what...what are you on about?" They asked, but it was clear enough when Yunho grabbed at their shoulders, holding them still so he could examine them. One of his hands came up to tilt their head up and to the side, revealing a previously overlooked mark left by none other than his own pack leader. Yunho's breath caught in his throat, and he let out a growl that made Blue shiver.
He tugged at the neckline of their shirt, pulling it out of way to show off a few other love bites on their skin, down to the tiny puncture marks Hongjoong had left behind.
"That bastard," Yunho spat out, letting go of Blue and heading back for the door. They watched him with wide eyes as he put his shoes on, and they rushed to do the same before Yunho's quick stride could take him out of reach, their meal left abandoned on the desk and the door to Blue's dorm slamming shut behind them.
"Hey, what the hell is going on with you?" They asked, grabbing at Yunho's hand just before he reached the stairs. Their touch stopped him in his tracks, and when he looked at them he softened just a little, letting them catch a glimpse of their beloved Yunho before he was hidden behind the walls again. For a moment, their best friend felt so terribly out of reach, even with their fingers intertwined, with the warmth of him seeping into their skin.
"He touched you. He fucked you, didn't he?" Yunho asked. "I'll kill him."
They weren't used to seeing him like this. Yunho was slow to anger, and even when he was upset, it was never like this.
"I can smell him all over you, all over your fucking room. He's dead."
When Yunho pulled his hand away, it was still so gentle as if he were afraid of hurting them. He took off back towards his pack's dorm and, half terrified of what would happen if they didn't, Blue followed behind him.
Back at the dorm, things were quiet for once. The boys were minding their own business, San and Wooyoung curled up on the couch with Yeosang playing a game quietly in front of them. Mingi was tucked away in his room, Jongho too, and Seonghwa was tidying the kitchen after the dinner they'd all had. Hongjoong, however, hadn't left his room since he got home and scrubbed himself clean in the shower, trying to wash the feeling, and the scent, and the guilt of everything he'd done from his skin.
The calm was shattered by the door slamming open, probably hard enough to dent the wall, and certainly loud enough to alert the entire floor of Yunho's anger.
"Hongjoong," He screamed.
The name hung heavy in the air. It wasn't common for Yunho to call his hyungs by name, and never so loud, and deep, and weighted.
Seonghwa was the first person to respond, rounding into the living room. He checked on the others first, a side glance to make sure the three boys weren't overly startled. All of them were just looking on with wide eyes and tensed muscles in case they needed to leap into action.
"What's going on?" Seonghwa asked delicately, looking between Yunho and Blue, who had only just managed to catch up and was breathless and clearly distressed.
"Where is he? Hongjoong, get out here!" Yunho shouted again, taking a step to pass Seonghwa, who reached out to grab his arm. "I know what you did, you bastard. Come on,"
Mingi came out first, looking visibly shaken. If anyone knew Yunho anywhere near as well as Blue did, it was Mingi, and he was certainly not familiar with this side of the wolf either. Jongho's door opened a second later, and he looked more bothered by the noise than anything else.
"Hey, what's up?" Mingi asked, taking a couple cautious steps towards the trio with Jongho following behind.
"I need to talk to Hongjoong. Now." It was the first proper answer that Yunho had given since they got there, and Seonghwa finally stepped away to grab his mate.
"Okay, he'll be out in a second. Just take a breath, okay?" Mingi reached out to massage Yunho's shoulder. Having Mingi at his side calmed him down a little bit, much to Blue's relief, but it was clear that he wasn't over his emotions just yet. "Can you tell us what this is about?"
"Don't worry about it." Yunho said, eyes still trained on the hallway and frame practically blocking Blue from the room. Mingi stepped past him to get to the witch instead.
"What's gotten into him? I've never seen him like this before."
Blue picked at the old, frayed hoodie that they were wearing, one of Yunho's, and maybe Mingi's before that, but it had been in their closet so long they couldn't remember. They wished desperately that it was doing more to make them feel safe at that moment. They shook their head.
"I did something stupid. Really really stupid, and Yunho is pissed. I don't know....I don't..." They sniffled, fighting back tears.
Mingi's expression shifted into one of understanding as Hongjoong finally stepped into the hallway with Seonghwa behind him. As soon as Hongjoong joined the room, any calm that had washed over Yunho was gone again.
"You," He jabbed a finger in the air towards the leader, taking a few steps towards him only for Hongjoong to stand his ground, chin tipped up defiantly. "What the fuck is your problem?"
"Calm down." Hongjoong answered. He looked past Yunho's looming form to where Blue was still standing with Mingi, the Cupid's arm around their shoulder as if to steady them from the shock of what was happening in front of them.
"Don't tell me what to do, you have no right to do that. And don't even think about looking at them, I think you've seen more than enough." He growled, baring his teeth. His fangs were on full display, and his eyes were flickering amber when Hongjoong looked back at him.
"I think we can have this conversation in private."
"Why? Because you don't want everyone to know that you took them from me? Because you know that you're a fucking dick for touching them? You don't have a right to act like I'm the one in the wrong here."
A wave of understanding washed over the room, and everyone looked over at Blue. They shrunk closer to Mingi's side, and he shook his head at his pack mates.
"Nobody said you're in the wrong, now let's take a deep breath and we can talk about this." Hongjoong said. Blue hadn't seen him like this either, his entire being radiating pure dominance, and they could see the other members shrinking away from him. But not Yunho, he puffed his chest out, baring his wolf proudly and without hesitation. Pack leader or not, no level of respect of rank difference could have stopped him from pursuing this battle. The only other member of the pack who moved was Jongho, the de facto protector with his eyes red and his energy darkening enough to dim the lights in the room.
Blue was shaking, and they wanted to run away from the situation entirely, but instead they were rooted in place so firmly that they weren't sure they'd be able to leave even if things turned bloody.
"You knew all along, I know you did, but you couldn't keep your hands to yourself," Yunho growled, poking a finger into the center of Hongjoong's chest. The smaller man huffed out at the feeling, taking a step back from the sheer pressure, but refusing to cave in. "My mate? What, you just had to assert your dominance? Put me in my place? What the hell did I ever do to you?"
"It's not like that," Hongjoong shook his head, and when he looked over at Blue, he looked genuinely remorseful. Blue looked at their feet, the gears turning in their head. Mate. Of course they knew what it meant, but hadn't occurred to them that Yunho may have cross-species imprinted, that he'd imprinted at all.
Their whole lives it had been just the two of them, and then Mingi, then the others. If anything, they'd assumed he'd imprinted on Mingi and they'd all live happily ever after, but now...now every memory of their lives looked a little different in their memory. Their stomach twisted in knots, wave after wave of nausea hitting them.
"Oh, of course it's not." Yunho snapped. His arm wound back to land a punch, but before he could swing, a firm hand gripped his elbow with inhuman strength that had the wolf groaning in pain.
"Don't." Jongho warned, steady and calm amongst everything going on. His aura of darkness had turned a smokey grey, materializing into shadow around him. Yunho's eyes softened when he noticed how hard the Hellhound was fighting, the internal battle of which side to take in his own pack. Then he looked at the others, his entire pack putting distance between themselves and the two wolves clashing in the middle of the dorm, between themselves and him. Wooyoung looked startled, and San looked so wounded that Yunho worried he might have actually hurt him.
And Blue, his beautiful Blue, so close to tears and huddled up in Mingi's arms. His heart shattered, his mind spinning. He didn't know if he was angry, or scared, or just blinded by jealousy, but whatever it was that he was dealing with had him feeling weighed down and wholly out of place.
"You can be mad at me if you want to, but that won't change anything. Did you even talk to them before dragging them here? Do they know what's happening?" Hongjoong asked, trying not to let his emotions come through in his voice, but his own anger and bitterness were evident.
Of course he knew that was the problem, he was the villain in the story, but he wasn't ready to back down and admit that. Losing to Yunho was one thing, but it was another entirely to lose to him in front of their entire pack. He wasn't going down without a fight, and he wasn't ready to acknowledge that all of the hurt and anger and frustration were desperately outweighed by guilt and concern. He'd really never meant to hurt Blue, or Yunho, or anyone.
"Did you bond with them? Did you tell anyone? Or did you think that wanting them was enough to make them yours? Because God knows they'll give you whatever the fuck you want. Do you really think I'm scummy enough to do anything they didn't want me to?" Hongjoong pushed on, stalking closer to Yunho, who finally took a step back.
His words hung heavy, and he could feel everyone's eyes on him, the disapproval. He regretted it the second that he said it, but it was too late for him to take them back now.
"Hongjoong," A voice said, soft but firm enough to cut the tension. "Don't say things you'll regret. I think you both need some time to cool down, we can handle this later."
Seonghwa stepped forward, placing himself between the two of them. The room was burning hot, and everyone looked about one second away from snapping or bursting into tears.
"They're my mate. You know how sacred that is. I never would have done this to you," Yunho said after a moment, taking another few slow steps back from the wolf in front of him. "Stay away from us, or you'll regret it. I thought I meant something to you, but clearly you've only ever cared about yourself and your stupid ego."
Those were the last words Yunho ever intended to say to Hongjoong. He turned, taking Blue's hand gently, trying not to scare them more than he already had. As he pulled them out of the dorm, Blue looked back, eyes glossy with tears and dark with desperation as they silently begged Hongjoong to look at them. They were wading through the shame too, through the pain of watching the pack separating because of them. He didn't look up, not a single glance, just watched the floor as the door shut.
The quiet in the room was deafening with Yunho gone. Hongjoong could feel tears pricking his eyes, could feel the building desperation to break down, the weight of it trying to drag him to the ground. He had done a lot of terrible things in his life, he knew damn well that his hands weren't clean, but he'd never imagined that he would carry the weight of destroying his own pack. He had never been so impulsive, and reckless, and cruel, and selfish. And now it was time for him to face the consequences of his actions.
"Hyung," It was Mingi who finally spoke. And Hongjoong prayed that his usual kind, patient words would follow. "Blue? What were you thinking?"
Hongjoong felt the words run right through him. He couldn't breathe, lips parting in a silent gasp as he tried to steady himself. It was true, though, everyone knew from the moment they met him that Yunho had imprinted on Blue, that he just needed the time to realize it, and Hongjoong had taken that from him. Why? Because he was bitter? Because he was self-destructing? Surely he could have destroyed himself in a quicker, less devastating way than this.
"I don't know," He answered.
"You shouldn't have fought with him. You know how he feels about them, and he hadn't even figured it out yet." San said. His voice was gentler, but his words were still a slap in the face.
Nobody else had anything to say as they left, and maybe the silence hurt more. Then it was just him and Seonghwa, and Hongjoong couldn't keep his composure anymore. He sank to the ground at his lover's feet, head in his hands and sobs quaking his body. Seonghwa stepped closer, and laid a hesitant hand to the crown of his head.
"What have I done?" Hongjoong asked, looking up at his lover. Seonghwa just shook his head, lips pursed into a line and silent disappointment painted on his face. Seonghwa gave his head one last stroke before leaving him alone.
The dorm had never felt this quiet or cold to Hongjoong before, he'd never felt so uncomfortable in the home he'd made. He closed his eyes, tipping his face to the sky and sending out a prayer to whatever or whomever it was that was waiting for him at the end of this cruel life. Please, he begged, please let this be over, let him fix this, and - at the end of the line - let him suffer for what he'd done. He deserved that much.
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thatblvckboyy · 4 months ago
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Hong joong x male listener smut audio
Hong-joong just love how tight and warm you are the perfect stress reliever for him when he got home from work all stressed out
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atzaurora · 4 months ago
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╰┈➤ ɪɴᴛᴏxɪᴄᴀᴛɪɴɢ
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[˗ˏˋ ´ˎ˗] mіძᥒіgһ𝗍 mᥱᥣ᥆ძіᥱs
❥ 𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓: Hongjoong
➤ 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: fem!idol!songwriter!reader x idol!songwriter!hongjoong
➤ 𝒕𝒚𝒑𝒆𝒔: imagine (smut)
➤ 𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑: group members, good friends
.ᐟ.ᐟ𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔.ᐟ.ᐟ: 18+/smut/suggestive content, MDNI!!!, unprotected sex
➤ 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚: Stuck in the studio late at night with Hongjoong and who knew, what you were writing in the song would turn into reality...
➤ 𝒘/𝒄: > not counted <
➤ 𝒂/𝒏: as you can see I changed my theme for my blog >.< I hope y'all like it! anyways enjoy this fanfic with Hongjoong
if you have any ideas or wishes let me know, requests are open
here's my [𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕]!
[𝒓𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕]here!
about me, my writings, request rules [𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆]
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It was late at night, too late to form a straight thought around all of the work in front of you.
Being in the songwriting position alongside Hongjoong could be a blessing and a curse at the same time. You loved writing songs, putting your all into the lyrics but you hated how long you and him had to stay up sometimes just to find the right words.
Eventually the words came to your minds as you sat there scribbling it down onto a piece of paper and testing out some beats that could fit the vibe of the song. Hongjoong groaned, leaning back into his chair, his hands covering his eyes in exhaustion.
"Shit, it's so late already," he glanced at you, lowering the hands from his face. "Do you want to go to sleep? You must be tired already?"
You smiled at how he looked out for you but shook your head. "No, it's alright. Plus, we both should write the song. I don't want to leave you to it all alone."
He nods approvingly. "Yeah, you're right. But before you collapse please tell me, we can always continue tomorrow, okay?"
"Yes, I know, but I'm fine, I'm not that tired." It was sort of a lie to be honest because in fact you were tired already. You turned back to face the paper.
Hongjoong’s eyes lingered on you for a moment longer, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips before he turned back to his notebook. The two of you worked in silence, the only sounds being the scratching of pens on paper and the occasional sigh of frustration. The lyrics were shaping up nicely, weaving a tale of forbidden desire and hidden passion.
As the night wore on, the words on the page grew increasingly sensual. The group had agreed earlier on doing a song a little more explicit than usual just to test it out.
Hongjoong’s voice softened as he read aloud a particularly provocative line. “Your touch ignites a fire, burning with forbidden desire…” He trailed off, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. There was something different in his gaze, something darker and more intense.
You felt a shiver run down your spine, the atmosphere in the room shifting palpably. “That’s... perfect,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
Hongjoong’s eyes stayed locked on yours, a small smirk forming on his lips. “Yeah? You think so?” He leaned closer, his hand brushing against yours as he reached for a pencil. The contact was brief, but it sent a jolt of electricity through you.
“Definitely,” you managed to say, your voice trembling slightly. You tried to focus on the paper in front of you, but the proximity of Hongjoong was making it difficult to concentrate. His cologne, a mix of cedarwood and vanilla, was intoxicating.
As the song continued to take shape, the lyrics grew bolder, more explicit. You could feel the tension building between you, an unspoken understanding passing between the two of you. Hongjoong’s touches became more frequent, more deliberate. His fingers would linger on yours a moment too long, his knee would brush against yours under the table.
It was becoming harder to ignore the growing heat between you. Finally, Hongjoong put his pen down, leaning back in his chair with a satisfied sigh. “I think we’ve got something really special here,” he said, his voice low and husky. “Don’t you think?”
You nodded, your heart pounding in your chest. “Yeah, we do.”
Hongjoong’s gaze was intense, his eyes dark with an emotion you couldn’t quite place. He reached out, his fingers gently tilting your chin up to meet his gaze. “You know,” he murmured, his thumb brushing over your lower lip, “some of these lyrics... they make me think of you.”
Your breath hitched, the air between you charged with electricity. “Hongjoong...” you whispered, your voice trailing off as he leaned closer
“Tell me if I’m out of line,” he said softly, his lips just inches from yours. “But I can’t stop thinking about you. About us.”
Before you could respond, his lips were on yours, soft and insistent. You melted into the kiss, your hands tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer. The notebook and pens scattered to the floor as Hongjoong lifted you onto his lap, your legs straddling his waist.
The kiss deepened, becoming more urgent. His hands roamed over your body, exploring and caressing. You could feel the hard evidence of his arousal pressing against you, sending a thrill of excitement through your body.
Hongjoong’s lips trailed down your neck, sucking and nibbling, leaving a trail of hickeys in his wake. You moaned softly, your hips grinding against him as you sought more friction. His hands slipped under your shirt, his touch sending shivers down your spine.
“God, Y/N,” he groaned, his lips returning to yours in a heated kiss. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
You rocked your hips against him, feeling the heat between you growing. “Show me,” you whispered, your voice breathless.
Hongjoong didn’t need any more encouragement. He lifted you effortlessly, carrying you over to the couch in the corner of the studio. He laid you down gently, his body covering yours as he kissed you deeply.
Your hands fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, desperate to feel his skin against yours. He helped you, shrugging off his shirt and tossing it aside before returning his attention to you. His hands slid under your shirt, pushing it up and over your head.
His lips found your breasts, sucking and licking, drawing soft moans from your lips. Your fingers dug into his shoulders, your body arching towards him as he continued his ministrations.
“Hongjoong, please,” you gasped, your need for him growing unbearable.
He smiled against your skin, his hands moving to unbutton your jeans. “I’ve got you, baby,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with promise.
As he removed the last of your clothing, you could feel the cool air of the studio against your heated skin. Hongjoong’s eyes roamed over your body, his expression one of pure desire. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, his lips capturing yours once more.
His hands and lips explored every inch of you, leaving you breathless and wanting. When he finally positioned himself between your legs, you could hardly stand the anticipation.
You felt his body heat radiating against your own skin, making you feel hot despite the fresh breeze from the air conditioner.
He took his dick into one of his hand, the other one holding your waist down, in a firm grip. His tip grazed your hole, drawing circles around it.
“Are you sure?” he asked softly, his eyes searching yours for any hesitation.
“Yes,” you whispered, your voice filled with need. “Please, Hongjoong.”
He entered you slowly, the sensation overwhelming. You gasped, your nails digging into his back as he began to move. The rhythm he set was slow and deliberate, each thrust sending waves of pleasure through your body.
“Y/N,” he groaned, his lips finding yours in a searing kiss. “You feel so good.”
You could only moan in response, your body arching towards his as the pleasure built. His hands gripped your hips, guiding you to meet his thrusts.
Your hips lifted away from the soft fabric, which each thrust, only for him to take your sides and press them down. "Come one, doll, stay put."
The sound of your combined moans and the slap of skin filled the room, the intensity of your connection leaving you breathless.
His cock slammed harder into you, burying himself deeper and hitting your gummy spot. "R-right there," you whimpered, grabbing onto his wrists.
As you reached your peak, Hongjoong’s name fell from your lips in a breathless cry. He followed soon after, his body tensing as he found his release.
Your liquids mixed inside you, finding their way around his length and leaking out once he pulled out of you.
The two of you lay there for a moment, catching your breath. Hongjoong’s hand brushed a strand of hair from your face, his eyes filled with tenderness. “Are you okay?” he asked softly, his thumb caressing your cheek.
You nodded, a smile spreading across your lips. “Yeah, I’m more than okay.”
He chuckled softly, pulling you into his arms. “Good. Because I don’t think I can ever get enough of you.”
You snuggled into his embrace, feeling content and happy. As you lay there in the afterglow, you couldn’t help but think that this night had changed everything.
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crimsonbubble · 3 months ago
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IM BOUTA TWEAK IN THIS BITCH BRUH
the slow smirk omG HES GETTING HEAD
I need him in a way that concerns humanity
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sunmoonjune · 10 months ago
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spring tides [like the moon universe]
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pairing: poly!ot8 ateez x fem!oc!reader
warnings: vague mentions of eating disorder, death and torture, scars, ptsd, very fluffy! a lot of comfort! not so dark this time xD I did not proofread this :D
word count: 14.1k
a/n: hello y'all :D I have returned with some LTM for you <;3 This is a oneshot for my like the moon universe! You don't necessarily need to read the series to understand this fic but it definitely helps the immersion and understanding some of the plot points! you can find all chapters of ltm on my masterlist <3
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Seonghwa remembers something in the spring of your third year with Ateez. As he watches you at Jongho’s side, silently offering the guard slices of fruit as he cleans his claymore, Seonghwa recalls that he doesn’t know when your birthday is. 
Jongho is murmuring something about the design of his blade and the engraving along the handle when Seonghwa stands abruptly. The eldest shifts on his feet, brows furrowed and teeth worrying his bottom lip. His lips purse when Jongho questions him. 
“Hwa?” 
The red-haired guard looks up at his partner with a lilt of concern in his voice, hands halting their motion on his blade. Jongho’s dark eyes glint as the fading sun catches the hickory color of his irises. 
“Is there something wrong?” Jongho continues, already shifting to stand to his feet. “Are you alright?”
You rock on your feet, legs stretching as you prepare to stand with Jongho. Your eyes flicker across camp, scanning for whatever has caught Seonghwa’s attention. There’s two swords still strapped to your back and you can nearly feel the cool metal pressing into your skin – a haunting reminder of the terrible things you’ve done with them. The buzz beneath your skin itches with the beginnings of adrenaline, already prepared to stand and defend the two Ateez members at your sides.
Seonghwa lifts his hands and shakes his head to soothe you and Jongho before you can stand. He softly waves his hands to encourage you to sit back onto the carved log beneath you, a wary smile on his lips. 
“No, it’s nothing,” he murmurs, still gnawing at his lip as he finishes. He offers a barely concealed sigh and shakes his head again. “‘M alright, just remembered something.” 
Jongho doesn’t seem satisfied with the answer, but he settles back onto the floor regardless. His hands return to wiping down his claymore but he doesn’t look away from his partner. 
You share the sentiment, continuing to watch Seonghwa and making note of each creak and scratch that echoes through the camp. You don’t know what startled him, but you’ll be prepared for the next time. The fruit in your hands has made your fingers sticky in the brief moments you spent looking up at Seonghwa rather than cutting the supple treat. 
You don’t mind though. You like slicing fruit for Jongho.  He doesn’t eat enough, you’ve noticed. You’re not quite sure why, but you suppose you don’t quite know how to ask. No matter the reason, it brings you comfort when he continues to take slices of succulent fruit from you as he cleans. He doesn’t look up, simply trusting you to place the pieces into his hands so he can eat without trouble. When you sat beside him that morning with the fruit in your hands, Jongho raised an eyebrow but didn’t mention it. You ate the first few slices before offering them to the wine-haired guard, who accepted them with a small smile. Every so often, he turns slightly, ensuring that you’re continuing to eat as much as he does. 
At one point he tilts his head back, looking up at you with those pretty, boba pearl eyes and opens his mouth slightly. Both his hands are occupied, busy with the intricate care his blade necessitates. With your heart thumping quickly in your chest, you place a slice of fruit on Jongho’s waiting lips and try desperately not to linger on the thought of how full and supple they are. 
“Thanks, love,” he murmurs without looking at you, the words sweet and saccharine in the low timber of his voice. 
Seonghwa laughed when Jongho’s cheeks pinkened after that, but you weren’t really sure why. 
Turning his attention to you, Seonghwa looks down at your figure. Sitting with a slight slump in your shoulders, the spymaster smiles faintly. Slouched posture is a good sign, he muses. You’re comfortable. 
When you tilt your head to the side, silently questioning Seonghwa’s thoughts, you reach up to gingerly grasp his fingers. There’s no hesitation. There hasn’t been in a long while. Seonghwa extends his hand in offering when he notices your appendages twitch. His warmth sinks into your palm and you nearly hum at the soothing feeling. 
You squeeze his hand twice before lingering for a longer third.
‘Are you okay?’ you silently question.
Seonghwa’s lips quirk into another gentle smile, but his eyes are distant. It makes your heart tug painfully. The hickory of his near-black irises is muted. You miss the glimmer of those sweet, dark eyes that show when he smiles. 
“Yeah, m’alright, lovebug.” 
Your heart slams into your ribs – a delighted feeling. Lovebug. You like that. 
Seonghwa leans closer to repeat the gesture, squeezing twice and then lingering for an ‘okay.’ His other hand lifts to run over the back of your head with a delicate movement. Fingers carefully scratch against your scalp and you resist the temptation to lean into his hands and exhale softly. 
“I have to go see Joong and Yunho, though. I really did just remember something I wanted to speak to ‘em about,” he whispers. Dragging his nails gently over the nape of your neck once more, Seonghwa smiles when you finally lean into his touch with a quiet rumble. He thinks you look positively cat-like. When one set of lashes flutters against your cheek in a tired, pleased expression, Seonghwa could coo at the endearing look. He withholds only to save you the embarrassment of his mother-hen tendencies. 
Your one eye flickers over his expression once more before you relent and nod your head just once. Seonghwa’s hand begins to pull away from your head, and this time you do make a tiny sound of sadness. The eldest feels his heart squeeze at your reluctance to be parted from him, leaning close to drag his thumb over the stiff material of your mask with a sweet touch before he stands upright once more. 
“I’ll be back in a minute, okay? You and Jongho finish up and join us for dinner soon.” 
You let out a short exhale through your nose, a sound they’ve taken to signify your agreement. Jongho’s lips twitch at the noise, trying to hold back the laugh he wants to let out. 
“Okay,” you whisper softly beneath your breath as you lean back against the back of the log. Seonghwa smiles and finally shifts his stance to leave, only pressing a gentle kiss to Jongho’s brow before walking off. Your head tilts one last time as Seonghwa leaves, wondering if perhaps one day he’ll kiss your head too when he takes his leave. 
The archer finds Yunho before Hongjoong. The tallest of Ateez is easy to collect when Seonghwa gives him a meaningful look. The tension in the eldest’s brow must convince Yunho that there is something important he is needed for because he immediately follows after Seonghwa. The two find themselves in the Captain’s cavern, his and Seonghwa’s really, standing before the long-haired leader with a small frown on the archer’s lips. 
Hongjoong mimics the frown, coming to a stand behind the desk currently holding a plethora of worn maps. 
“What’s wrong?” 
Seonghwa sighs, squeezing his fists together before he turns to face Yunho with a solemn expression. 
“When’s her birthday?” 
Yunho’s brow quirks at the same time the tension in his shoulders finally loosens a notch. Sighing softly, he licks his lips and answers.
“Tiny’s?” 
Seonghwa nods, the expression on his face unchanging: serious and solemn, as if the situation was as grave as a wake. Hongjoong glances between the two men, his brow now lifted in surprise, but he says nothing. 
“It’s been three years since she’s been with us,” Seonghwa murmurs tersely. “But we haven’t celebrated her birthday. The first year I could understand missing it – I mean, she was still adjusting to Ateez, and even after that she’s still a little apprehensive. Not that I blame her, of course – I just… It’s been three full years and I can’t believe we’ve missed her birthday at least three times.” 
Yunho’s bottom teeth sink into his lip and his eyes suddenly dart towards the floor. He swallows once, shifting on his feet and sighs as he ponders how to answer Seonghwa’s question. The eldest watches his partner with that same, tense look and his eyes glisten with something sad – something understanding, as if he knows Yunho’s answer before he speaks it aloud. 
“I don’t know,” Yunho finally answers quietly. He looks down at his feet, unable to meet his elder’s eyes. His eyes squeeze shut with another sigh that shakes through his shoulders. He repeats himself louder, still just barely above a whisper. “I don’t know.” 
Hongjoong steps forward from behind his desk. “What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?” 
“I mean I don’t know,” Yunho whispers sadly. “And she doesn’t either.” 
Seonghwa licks his lips, grasping at strings as he scrambles to find the right words to say. 
“I don’t understand. How can she not know her own birthday?” 
Yunho won’t look up from his feet. His fingers curl into fists and the tips of his nails dig into his palms from the tightness of his grip. He can’t bring himself to loosen his hold. 
“Tiny, uh… After everything that happened with her – with that village, they don’t particularly regard her… fondly, you know?” 
Yunho speaks slowly and methodically, as if trying carefully to pick the right words to say. His tone is terse and cold, the disdain for the village of his past more than evident in his voice. Hongjoong looks up at his partner with a frown still on his lips, his heart pulsing sadly in his chest. 
“But she doesn’t know her own birthday? No one in her village told either of you?”
Yunho sighs again, finally looking up at his Captain with grief plastered across his features in an expression neither man can ignore. Seonghwa is already stepping forward, settling an arm over Yunho’s shoulders and rubbing his thumb across the taller man’s jaw. 
Yunho leans closer to Seonghwa and continues, voice deep and throaty with the weight of his words. “We celebrated it once. Back when we were young – back when… Daia was still around.” 
Hongjoong looks away. 
“But even then,” Yunho continues softly, trying not to think of the bony cage casting shadows of your quivering form. You were so young. Little fingers grasped the cold bars that separated him from you, desperately whispering a plea for him to leave. He should have known your father wouldn’t let you celebrate your birthday like he and the other children did. But the smile on your face was so pure, so genuinely happy that he could never utter the words that may wipe it away. 
 “We didn’t know the exact date – just that she was born in the spring. Her father… well he killed the attendants that assisted her mother through labor. Not that we could prove it, of course. Anyone around for Bug’s birth… isn’t around anymore. And Bug was raised kind of secluded the first few years of her life. No one knows exactly when she was born and her father certainly wouldn’t say.” 
Seonghwa’s eyes continue to glisten with that broken look, and he licks his drying lips before he speaks. His heart throbs painfully, echoing the sadness in his face.. “And… after Daia wasn’t around anymore?” 
Seonghwa hates that he asks. 
Yunho shifts on his feet and looks away again. 
“I, uh… I don’t know much of what happened after Daia…” he trails off for a long moment. “By that time, the village and her father turned their backs on Bug, and I… I was exiled a few years later.” 
Seonghwa thumbs over Yunho’s jaw again, trying to soothe his lover’s agony. Hongjoong steps closer and lays his hand across Seonghwa’s back, their combined sadness near tangible in the cavern hall. 
“Bug’s birthday…” Yunho finally continues. “She’s never seen it as a good thing, you know? Her father and the village certainly didn’t see it that way.” 
Seonghwa’s eyes sadden, the shine of his irises dulling at Yunho’s confession. He turns over his shoulder to look at Hongjoong and presses his lips together, as if regretting bringing up the topic altogether. 
“A good thing?” Hongjoong whispers. 
Yunho shakes his head, his frown dragging down his lips as he breathes softly. “Not something worth celebrating. The day she was born was… the start of everything bad, I guess.” 
Seonghwa’s eyes squeeze shut, the burn of tears forcing pressure to build in the corners. 
“Sometimes I think,” Yunho whispers tiredly, his eyes cloudy and unfocused as he stares into the distance. “I think she might hate it; that she might despise the day of her birth because of all the pain that came after.”
Hongjoong takes a deep breath in through his nose, trying to soothe the anguish that swells inside his ribs. There’s grief there, rage too, settling in the pit of his stomach and pushing upwards into his chest and throat. It’s not directed at you – it could never be. It’s towards your father, towards your village, towards anyone that has looked at you with disdain and uttered that foul moniker he knows makes you flinch. 
“I’m sorry, Yun.” 
Yunho shakes his head, leaning into Seonghwa’s hand and looking down at Hongjoong with his eyes glistening with welling tears. He swallows, clearly resisting the urge to cry, and kisses Seonghwa’s thumb when it brushes his mouth. “‘S okay, Seonghwa. I know your intentions were honorable.” 
Seonghwa nods, finally leaning forward until his head rests against Yunho’s collarbone. An arm wraps around the eldest’s shoulders and Hongjoong presses himself against Seonghwa’s back, encasing both him and Yunho. 
“So don’t bring up her birthday, then?” Hongjoong whispers, frown still drawing his lips downward. He speaks the question into Seonghwa’s shoulder blade, his lips grazing the tunic covering his skin. 
Yunho is silent for a long moment. No one speaks and the sounds of their hushed breaths are all that echo through the hollowed cavern. Yunho ponders his Captain’s question in the silence and thinks of your growth in the years you’ve spent in their camp. Would you rather they never mention your birthday again? Or would you appreciate a different kind of memory to replace the shaded pains of the ones long past?
Soon after, Yunho leans forward to bury his face into Seonghwa’s hair before he breathes deeply and pulls back, a small quirk lifting the corner of his lips. He thinks of you and that youthful grin that used to grace your lips more often as a child. Yunho recalls the mischief in your smile and the wonder that would flash across your eyes, and he begins to twist an idea around his thoughts. It’s that look he wants to see again. He always wants to see it; the mischief, the awe, the teasing grin you used to throw over your shoulder to get him to chase you through the training grounds. He wants that so badly. 
“Actually, Captain…” 
Hongjoong peels his head away from Seonghwa’s shoulder, looking up to meet Yunho’s eyes with a raised brow and a question in his eyes. “Hmm?”
Yunho finally manages a fraction of a smile, stroking his hand over Seonghwa’s shoulders as he speaks. 
“I think there might be a way we can show her that her birth is something worth celebrating. I’ll need your help though.” 
“Anything.” 
“Anything for her,” Seonghwa finishes at the same time Hongjoong speaks. 
Yunho’s heart swells. The soft grin on his features begins to stretch, mirrored by his two elders. Pride begins to surge beneath his skin and it makes him feel fuzzy. 
“What do you need?” Hongjoong whispers into the fraction of space separating their lips. Yunho huffs a smile, leaning closer until his mouth brushes against his leader’s. 
“How do you feel about a little trip, Captain?” 
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Time passes easily. About a week goes by after the conversation between you, Jongho and Seonghwa before Hongjoong announces that Ateez will be spending a few nights traveling away from camp. He won’t say where they’re traveling to nor why they’re going, but there’s a mischievous grin on his lips when you tilt your head in suspicion. No one will tell you anything about the adventure other than handing you a cloth pack to gather some things for the trip. 
Mingi helps you clean your blades and slides them into the scabbards on your back for you. Seonghwa packs food away carefully and slides extra servings of dried and cured meats into your pack followed by the fruit he knows you and Jongho love. San and Yeosang sit by your side as you help sort the first aid supplies the camp may need. The inky vines wrapping around Yeosang’s forearms flashes from beneath his sleeves, and you find yourself following the sight of the tattoo each time you peek a glimpse of golden skin covered in leafy shapes. 
San laughs and raises an eyebrow at his lover when he flicks his shirt above his waistband playfully, showcasing the span of scales descending over his hip and up his waist. He giggles when you reach forward to pull his shirt higher over his side, eager to follow the lines of ink up his torso. San pushes your hands away and promises to show you one day. Wooyoung enters the cavern a moment later and exchanges a knowing look with San, as if the same pattern of obsidian scales crawls up the opposite side of his own torso. 
On the morning Hongjoong announced their leave, you pack the last of your things diligently in the cloth pack given to you. There’s something fond rippling through your chest as you slide a hand over the large tunic laid across your bed. 
The sensation seeps all the way down to your toes, a bittersweet happiness that arose from the realization that you’ve never… owned things before. 
In that village, nothing was ever yours. It was always stolen or taken, never owned. 
But now… 
Now there’s all kinds of things in your corner of the medical cavern. There’s the little rope of twine with eight little beads Yeosang gave you to fiddle with so you wouldn’t pick and pull at your nails. There’s the bear-hide blanket Jongho handmade when you started to grow cold in the winter nights. A pile of spare clothes tailored to fit your size sits beneath your bed. A hollowed shell of smooth, rich cream sits beside you, specially made for you by Wooyoung and San when they noticed your scars were particularly aching in the cold weather. There’s a whetstone and cleaning tools beside your swords, left there by Mingi when he noticed your blades were dulling. Seonghwa always leaves a myriad of flowers beside your bed each week, and the dried stems of all his past bouquets hang above your on a piece of twine Joong brought you. There’s armor and chainmail beneath your bed, presented by Hongjoong with a shy smile. He cleans them for you when he thinks you’re not looking, ensuring the armor stays in good shape and protects you well. One of Yunho’s thicker tunics lies at the foot of your bed, a staple of your growing closet of clothes. He knows you like having his scent nearby. There’s books too, ones from the medical cavern and ones from Wooyoung, who you’ve discovered is quite the avid reader. 
There’s just… all sorts of things. 
And you’ve never really owned things before. It’s strange. And quite enjoyable, you decide.
You like owning things. You like being part of Ateez – being part of a family. 
With your lips twitching upwards into a fond smile, you stand with the last of your belongings and slide the straps of your cloth pack over your shoulders. It sits a little strangely on your back but you huff and step out of the cavern anyway. 
The rest of Ateez is already outside, shuffling the last of their belongings into storage and closing up the cave system behind you. A wooden sort of door slides shut behind you and the viny, earthen cover falls over it. It’s perfectly concealed from the wild, appearing just like any other cropping of rocks and stone. You marvel at their ingenuity and turn to find Wooyoung approaching you with a smile on his lips. 
“Good morning, Bug. Are you ready?” 
Your head tilts with a question as Wooyoung’s hands shift upwards to the straps of your pack. He raises a brow once, always asking for permission before he touches, and you shift closer and slide your hands onto his hips with a nod of your head. Wooyoung’s smile seems to widen, if at all possible, and he carefully begins to adjust the straps of your pack so it sits better across your back. Your gaze follows his hands, tracing over the fading scar on his one wrist – the space where a rusty shackle used to sit. Your lips quirk happily at the sight of the missing metal cuff, now long buried in the earth. He hums happily at the feeling of your hands on his waist, and chuckles beneath his breath when he feels your hands attempting to weasel under his shirt – likely another attempt to get a look at the tattoo you know sits there. 
Wooyoung huffs a breath as you skate a gentle hand over his bare hip, focusing on the wavy shape of an oscillating line your draw over his skin. He translates the word as ‘what’ and understands your inquisition to mean ‘Ready for what?’ 
“Can’t tell you,” he laughs, his chest shaking with the motion as you squeeze his hip in retaliation. “Sorry, baby. Captain’s orders; take it up with Hongjoong if you want to know so badly.” 
Your one eye rolls and Wooyoung laughs again, that bright, cackling sound echoing through the trees in a burst of noise that makes your heart flutter. You like Wooyoung’s laugh. 
“C’mon you two!” Hongjoong calls from a distance, already beginning to pace towards the southwest. “We’re burning daylight. Let’s get moving.” 
You respond with a choked hum despite knowing your Captain can’t hear it. Wooyoung grins, finally satisfied with the adjustments he’s made on your pack, and turns over his shoulder to call back, “We’re coming, Captain. Relax a little. It’s barely dawn, we’re on schedule.” 
You don’t need to see Hongjoong to know what expression the Captain has on his face. A tiny smile appears on your lips and when Wooyoung turns back to face you with a hand held out in offering, his grin beams once more. 
“C’mon, baby. You wanna walk with me and Sannie today?” 
Your answering nod is a little too eager, but Wooyoung doesn’t mention it. 
To you, anyway. The smug grin he shoots over his shoulder at Mingi and Yunho is met with a sigh and an eye roll. The vulgar gesture Mingi throws back goes unseen by you too. 
Seonghwa sees it though, and the sound of Mingi’s squawk when he’s slapped across the shoulder by the archer makes Wooyoung laugh again. 
It’s springtime. The forest is filled with bright shades of emerald green and flowers have begun to sprout along patches of sunlight. Lupin tickle at your ankles when you pass and you watch their lilac and lavender petals sway in the wind with a fond expression. Your last bouquet from Seonghwa was fresh Lupin flowers, a growing favorite of yours he has noticed. 
Wooyoung holds your hand as you walk, sometimes shifting to allow San to take his place. They talk happily as you stride through the forest, following Yeosang and Jongho as they lead your band of warriors through the trees. You still don’t know where you’re going nor why you’re going there, but you trust your Captain and you trust your family. 
Eventually, you unlink your hands from San to step ahead and walk besides Mingi and Yunho. San’s resounding pout and soft sigh are lost on you, but Wooyoung slides his hand into his partner’s empty fingers with a grin and a teasing poke to San’s side. Mingi intertwines his fingers with yours with a beaming grin and a happy chuckle, swinging your hands between you as you walk. He points out the flora and fauna he recognizes along the hike, explaining their uses as he recalls Yeosang’s teachings. He mentions the honey-haired healer’s tattoo sleeve of medicinal herbs and shows you some of the plants he recognizes to be inked into Yeosang’s skin. You eagerly categorize the leaves and petals of each plant, hoping that you’ll one day be able to find each one decorating Yeosang’s skin. 
The first night away from camp is spent sleeping beneath the stars. 
Your group of nine lays huddled together in a clearing in the pines, with a small fire burning quietly in the center for warmth. Shifts for watch are assigned and you find yourself curling between Yunho and San that night with a promise to take the final watch with Seonghwa. With cicadas clicking in the distance and a cool breeze rustling the branches above you, you find sleep easy that night. Strangely enough, despite resting out in the open with no cover around, you find you can sleep calmly. Nestled between your Yunho and your San, their body heat keeping you warm even underneath the fur blankets swaddled around you, you feel safe enough to sink into a well-earned sleep. You know the others will wake you if there’s trouble lurking about. They would never let anything happen to their family. 
The next day is spent between Hongjoong and Seonghwa, happily listening to their stories and eagerly nudging the both of them to show you some of the ink decorating their skin. Once you found out about Yeosang’s tattoos, there was nothing holding you back from asking the others about their own. Seonghwa relents with a teasing grin towards Hongjoong, showing you the pattern of large scales that crawl up his forearms. You trace the delicate scales with a happy sound, not noticing the shiver that crawls down Seonghwa’s spine. Hongjoong rolls his eyes at his partner, but he almost wishes to show you the ink decorating his back and spine too. He only waves you away with a laugh when you turn to him with a tilt of your head and a happy question on your lips. 
That night you sleep between Yeosang and Jongho, one of your legs wedged between the youngest’s and your hand clumsily intertwined between the healer’s fingers. This time, the nine of you settle in a cliff alcove, sheltered from the fog and the light drizzle of rain that spatters through the forest around midnight. 
There’s no telling how far you’ve traveled from Ateez’s hollow. It’s been two days of mostly hiking and stopping for breaks and meals, but you’ve long grown used to strenuous labor so the walk is not nearly as difficult as you once thought it to be. You still have little to no knowledge on your destination as your Captain is tight-lipped about the matter. He only gives you soft smiles and quiet laughter when you nag him about where or why you’ve left camp. 
On the third and last day of your long journey, you walk between Yeosang and Jongho at the front of your pack. The two have been leading you for three days, seeming to know the way without needing a map or compass. Every once and a while, Yeosang looks up at the night sky and lifts a hand to palm at the stars. You understand he must be checking your position, ensuring that they’re still on the right path, but you don’t ask. You find Polaris winking down at you each night with a fondness in your chest, and you give her a gentle, barely-there smile each time you see her. 
The healer and his partner pace through the trees with newfound urgency that morning. The two members eagerly shuffle through the trees with beaming grins and an energy that you cannot help but mimic. They’re excited about something – unfathomably so. 
“We’re almost there, honey,” Yeosang encourages you, holding out a hand to help you scale the final boulder before you begin your descent back down the mountainside. “Just another mile or so, I promise.”
You trust him. 
The others have begun to feed on the buzzing atmosphere building in the group. There’s tension simmering, but a good kind, as if there’s something awaiting your family at your destination. You don’t know what it is, but it must be something good if they’re eagerly beginning to quicken the pace. 
Soon after you begin your descent down the small mountain, the dense foliage of pine trees and packed soil gives way to something softer – something you’ve never quite seen or felt before. It’s pliable and squishy beneath your feet, allowing your weight to sink into the material with each step. It leaves footprints in your wake, the ground shifting and moving beneath your feet. 
Sand. 
It’s sand. 
You know it’s sand because Yeosang has some collected in a small jar in the medical cavern. You’ve never seen it before: sand or the sea. You found the tiny bottle of eroded stone once and carefully examined it with a puzzled expression until Yeosang found you. The miniscule grains of rock and shell shifted in the bottle as Yeosang explained where it was from. 
You listened to him for hours that day. 
He talked about the sea and his life as a captain of his own ship from the hour of the sun’s peak until it descended beneath the horizon. You were fascinated. Eagerly hanging onto every single one of his words, you listened to Yeosang with a rapture you couldn’t describe. He spoke of the ocean and the smell of salt in the fresh air, mentioning that there was a particular hint of something so ocean-like in the scent that he couldn't begin to describe. Yeosang described the sand and the shore, detailing how the plush sand like the stuff in his bottle gave way to harder packed ground the closer you grew to the sea. He talked of how it felt to play in the waves and to feel the cool touch of the ocean on his skin. 
You marveled at him for hours, longing desperately to one day know the smell he spoke of, to feel the ocean breeze tickle your skin and to feel its waves brush against your feet. 
It sounded wonderful. 
So when the sand beneath your feet begins to thicken, giving way to clumsier footsteps and the sound of something roaring in the distance, you perk upwards. 
Your entire body slams to a halt, startling San who walks behind you. Jerking upwards, your one eye darts over to Yeosang, who stands with Jongho at his side, already looking at you. There’s this look in their eyes; something fond and gentle – an expression you’ve begun to recognize. They watch you as you begin to piece together the information you’ve gathered of this little trip, smiles on their faces as you realize where they’ve taken you. 
At your side, San begins to bend forward, his hands reaching out to pull at the laces of your boots and chuckling beneath his breath. You reach out to stabilize yourself on his shoulder as you make a sound of confusion. 
‘What’s going on?’ you try to question without speaking.
At your back, Yunho runs a hand down your spine and soothes the tension in your shoulders. You reach back, grasping his hand with a strength that surprises you and draw that oscillating squiggle across the back of his hand with a bewildered expression. 
‘What’s happening?’ 
There’s another word you want to say. One you don’t have a translation for. A word you’ve never spoken or seen. 
Ocean. The sea. 
You don’t have a word for it. 
But you can smell it now. That salty, fresh sort of scent with a hint of something you cannot place. Just like Yeosang described. 
The sea. 
San taps your leg, garnering your attention and helping you lift your foot so you can place it on his knee. He’s kneeling at your feet, one leg propped up to lift your foot and the other in the sand beneath him. The healer pulls at your laces, beginning to untie your shoes and pull them from your feet with a grin. 
“C’mon, sweetheart,” he murmurs with that low timber that makes you shiver. “Let’s get these off.”
Your held tilts in confusion. Seonghwa chuckles behind you, leaning into Mingi’s side and shooting a look over at Wooyoung. “Gotta take your shoes off unless you want sand in the soles, Bug. It’ll be a pain to walk back with all that in ‘em. I promise you’ll never be able to get it all out.” 
Hongjoong laughs from beside Jongho, the Captain throwing his head back with a knowing grin. “Speaking from experience, huh, darling?” 
Seonghwa rolls his eyes and ignores his lover, dropping a hand to intertwine with Wooyoung’s. The younger eagerly locks their fingers together, smiling happily and leaning his head onto Seonghwa’s shoulder as you process everything. 
The others begin to pull off their own shoes, tying them to their packs or holding the laces in their fingers. Mingi laughs and pushes Wooyoung when he bends over to undo his laces, and when Wooyoung stumbles, he shouts indignantly and lurches upwards for revenge. Seonghwa laughs and tries to settle them, only to end up yanked out of the way by a grinning Yeosang. Wooyoung and Mingi screech at each other, beginning to race down the sand towards the roaring sound that continues to swell in the distance. 
You worriedly look down at San, his dark irises already looking up at you with adoration swirling behind them. The healer pulls off your sock and carefully sets your foot back onto the sand, watching as you marvel at the plush, cool material beneath the soles of your feet. 
“C’mon, tiny,” Yunho laughs behind you, chest rumbling as he speaks. The vibration echoes through your back from how close the warrior is pressed against you. He grins when you shiver pleasantly. “We’ve gotta catch up.” 
San lifts your other foot delicately and places it on his waiting knee, repeating the process of taking off your shoe and sock before he ties the laces together and stores them away in his pack. Before he sets your foot back onto the sand, San’s eyes twinkle with something mischievous.
He leans forward and drags his fingers across the skin of your calf, eyes crinkling as he smiles. You look back down at him with your stomach fluttering pleasantly, watching as San leans forward and presses his lips to the side of your calf. 
Oh. 
His lips skate over the muscle and his hand rests where your thigh connects with the knee. You feel your breathing still. Air catches in your lungs, and some burst of emotion lurches into your throat as you stop and stare down at the healer with one widened eye. You can feel the smile on San’s soft lips as he drags his mouth from your calf to your knee, kissing your skin sweetly as he goes. He drifts over scars both fresh and faded, but does not stop moving as he ascends up your calf. San leaves a trail of goosebumps in his wake, your skin practically shivering under his touch and lighting ablaze when he pulls away.
Oh. 
You stare open-mouthed at the healer when San finally slides a hand down your leg and deposits it onto the sand. You lick your lips once, trying desperately to come up with words to say, but there’s nothing. Just the trail of blazing heat San left behind and a roaring fire beginning to spread inside your chest. You can practically feel the heat in your face, and you lift a hand to palm at your cheek as San watches with a teasing grin. Your figure practically vibrates as you shiver through the emotion bursting through you. 
“San…” 
Said healer mimics your shiver as you whisper his name, fingers dancing along your calf before he stops. He presses one final kiss to your knee, at the crease of the joint, and this time your eye slides shut with a shiver. The plush feeling of his lips against your skin is ambrosia for your soul and the barest touch of moisture is left behind when he finally pulls away. 
He looks up at you with honey in his irises, hand skating down your calf once more and smiles. 
“C’mon, Bug. We’ve got places to be,” he teases, saccharine timber never failing to make you melt. 
As if he wasn’t the one distracting you. 
Finally, you’re able to squeeze his shoulder thankfully and San beams up at you in the way that makes those sweet little dimples poke out of his cheeks. You nearly lean forward to caress a finger of the indents that make your heart mushy, but still as the cool sand sinks between your toes. 
It’s… soft. 
The sand melts beneath your soles like butter, cradling your heels and caressing your skin like silk. You wiggle your toes and awe at the feeling, watching the sand shift and move with your lips just barely parted in wonder. San watches from your feet, his gentle eyes roaming over your partly-concealed face and grinning at the expression plastered across your features. Your lips are parted, but just barely, taking deep breaths to inhale the fresh air of the sea breeze and one eye dilated with awe. San's heart thumps vibrantly beneath his ribs, a song of your name. It calls out to you sweetly, and San swears that when he runs his hand across the bare skin of your leg, brushing over scars and broken skin, he can hear your heart call his name in return. 
Your one eye darts upwards to meet your Captain’s gaze. 
Hongjoong stares at you with some ineffable softness in his expression. He reaches a hand out to grasp your fingers, helping you step forward away from San. The healer stands from his kneeling position, his own footwear now missing, and joins you at your side. 
“You like it?” Hongjoong whispers as you near. 
The vigorous nod of your head is almost comical, and Hongjoong chuckles beneath his breath. Yes. Yes you like it. 
San beams at your side, unable to stop the mirthful sound of his laughter. It erupts from his chest in that giggling way that you adore. You tilt your head to look at him, your chest swelling and heart thumping with the tumultuous feelings surging within you. San reaches out to run a hand down your arm and you lean close offering a single line of ‘thanks’ across his palm. 
Yunho leans forward and pecks a kiss across your forehead, directly over the mask concealing the right half of your face and then turns to walk after Wooyoung and Mingi, San at his heels. He doesn’t acknowledge the kiss, but your heart jumps into your throat regardless. Your fingers itch to follow him, twitching in an attempt to reach for him, but you turn back to your Captain instead. 
Hongjoong is still looking at you, that ineffable softness still radiating from him. “C’mon, angel. Let’s go see the ocean.” 
You’ve never been more excited. 
Hongjoong begins pulling you in the direction the others have disappeared in, following them over the dunes of sand. At first, he pulls your awestruck figure behind him as you make your way through the deeping sand, turning back to watch you marvel at the grains of white and cream colored grains. Your feet drag, slowing the two of you down as you continue to look down at the sand beneath you. At one point, you can’t resist the temptation and you stop, carefully pulling your hand from Hongjoong’s to bend at the knees and drop into the sand. 
“Woah, angel!” Hongjoong gasps as you let go of his hand and urgently drop into the earth below. “Careful!” 
Dragging your fingers through the silky material, you watch the tiny pieces of sediment cascade back into the hills beneath you as they trail between your fingers. The sand is cool to the touch and gentle as it scratches against your skin. You thought it would be rough, but it’s not. Not this sand anyway. 
Seonghwa chuckles behind you, stopping to drop his hands beneath your shoulders and gently lift you back up to your feet. The others are little specks in the distance, just a few hundred yards away. The eldest carefully sets you on your feet and slides a hand down to intertwine with your own. 
“C'mon, lovebug. We haven’t even reached the good part yet.” 
The good part? You wonder. How could it possibly get any better than this? 
But as the crashing sound gets louder with each step you take and the smell of salt continues to grow stronger, you begin to realize what the good part is. 
Soon after, it becomes you dragging Hongjoong and Seonghwa through the sand dunes. Eagerly tugging them behind you as you race towards the others, you sink into the sand and stumble a few times, only catching yourself when either member scrambles to grab your waist. You push quicker through the deepening sand each time you right yourself, racing through the dunes until you finally see it. 
The sea. 
And you stop moving. 
Hongjoong and Seonghwa nearly crash into your back as you freeze, body halting at the top of the sand dune. Your one eye is transfixed on the view before you, mouth parted and body slack with awe. 
Waves are crashing along the shore, breaking into foamy surf as they collide with the cream-colored sand. There are little birds with thin, long legs dancing in the shoreline, pecking at things in the packed sand. You watch with fascination as they rush away in a flock from an oncoming wave. When the foam finally settles, they return to their feeding grounds, continuing to peck away at something beneath the darker sand. The smell of salt fills your senses and there’s a brush of water against your skin as a breeze carries a mist of salt onto the shoreline. 
You’ve never seen so much… color before. 
The ocean is blue. Green too, and teal and dark and bright, and every color in the range you can possibly think of. It’s aquamarine in the peaks of crashing waves and a darker cyan in the deepness of the salty water. There’s pale blue, creamy skies and even paler cream-colored clouds. You nearly wish you could reach out and touch one. 
It’s wonderful. And it’s so much more than you think you deserve. 
With awe on your features and mouth slightly parted, you stare mystified at the sea before you. Hongjoong steps up beside you, the others starting to circle back to stand nearby. They just stand there… watching you for a minute. 
They watch your one pupil dilate and your expression softens into wonderous glee. Their hands intertwine with each other, fingers squeezing one another and hearts thumping happily in their chests. There’s pride there, and affection too, roaring madly beneath their skin and calling out to the sea with a throaty, triumphant call. 
You like it. You like the sea. 
And they like you. 
Hongjoong slides a hand down your arm until he can gently link your scarred fingers with his own. Your attention briefly shifts away from the sea to look over at your captain. 
His soft brown hair rustles as the sea breeze flutters through the strands, and Hongjoong smiles. Eyes scrunching into a beaming grin, the one that you like so much, he offers a squeeze of your palm. The scar crossing his one eye moves with his expression and you adore the way it looks when he smiles. Chocolate brown irises flicker in the brightness of the sunlight and for a moment, you think you much prefer the color of his eyes than the enchanting blue-green of the sea. 
But it’s tough competition, of course. 
Hongjoong squeezes your hand once more, fully drawing your attention back to him, and he leans close to carefully grasp the side of your face. His palm gently cups your mask, stroking his thumb over the tough material with a delicateness you cannot fathom deserving. But he touches you regardless, even if it's the mask instead of your skin. Hongjoong doesn’t care that you continue to wear it. None of them do. It’s a part of you, and they’ll continue to care for you all the same. 
“Are you happy?” The Captain inquires, licking his lips as he watches you. 
The vigor in your nod nearly makes him laugh. His beaming grin only seems to widen and you find yourself stunned at how beautiful he looks happy. 
“Yeah? That’s good. I’m glad you’re happy, angel.” 
You want to ask something else. Something about why your little clan has ventured this far or perhaps something else, but you can’t begin to find the words for it. 
You don’t need to though. 
Hongjoong leans closer, his warm, umber eyes scanning your features as he whispers something only for you to hear. 
“Happy birthday, Bug.” 
You barely register the sentiment before your captain leans forward and gently presses his lips to the crown of your head. 
You don’t breathe. Too frightened that any movement will force him to pull away, you stay remarkably still and stare numbly into Hongjoong’s chest. 
His lips linger for a long moment against your hairline, and you feel the warmth of his exhale against your scalp. The feeling makes your stomach flutter pleasantly and suddenly your body feels like you’re going to vibrate out of sheer enjoyment. Another shiver tickles its way up your spine and you finally exhale shakily. Reaching a hand upwards, you clutch onto the hand Hongjoong has still cupping your cheek. 
Her heart finally throbs with a dull ache. 
Your birthday? 
You didn’t even think… 
Hongjoong exhales softly and bends to drop a second kiss onto your mask, just above where your right eye would be. It throbs suddenly, but not so painfully this time. 
Your birthday. 
They came all this way for you? 
All of this… leaving the camp, walking all this way, spending nights on the road, showing you the sea for the first time… they did this to celebrate your birthday? 
Your heart hurts. 
No one has ever done that for you before. 
You suppose Yunho and Daia tried once… but that didn’t end so well. Salt wells behind your one eye and your lip twitches just once, but it's enough for Hongjoong to catch. Your chest aches with the memory of your mother. It’s a hurt you could never quite soothe. 
The Captain’s smile is still bright when he pulls away but there’s a sadness beneath the joy. No, not sadness, you suppose. Something empathetic – something… bittersweet. 
Hongjoong knows. They all do. 
“My birthday?” Your mouth parts to let out the croaked sound. Your voice has gotten better. The deeper, rough tone of your voice has begun to fade after finally learning to use it again. It’s beginning to return to what it used to be – slow and steadily. 
From behind you, Yeosang hums deeply. You recognize the sound without turning to look at him. His voice always carries that undertone of sweet and smooth honey, and you can’t find any other way to describe it. 
“Yeah, honey. You told me you’ve never seen the sea, right? We thought it would make a good birthday present.” 
The healer is standing behind Hongjoong, San and Wooyoung at his sides and the rest of Ateez just beyond. They’re all here. For you. 
You shift on your feet, barely able to restrain the wetness of your one eye as you attempt to face them. Your heart still throbs, but it’s more of a pleasant ache – a good one. A sea breeze rustles your hair. Three silver rings click against your mask; a comforting sound that reminds you of home – of Yunho. The scent of salt in the air fills you with warmth and the silky sand beneath your feet cradles you in the earth’s gentle hands. The world itself seems to wrap around you in its kindness, delicately embracing you as if asking for forgiveness. 
It feels like your mother – like the hugs you can barely remember. 
The burn of tears returns tenfold. 
You’ve never celebrated your birthday before. It was never a day others regarded with joy, so you supposed it was only fair to see it the same way. You don’t even really know what day you were born. Father never told you – he never told anyone. 
But… perhaps this day – the day Ateez has chosen for you – can be your birthday. Maybe this time it doesn’t have to be a bad thing anymore. 
“We wanted to show you something new. Something good. Do you like it?” Wooyoung whispers as you process your feelings. His voice is apprehensive, as if he isn’t quite sure how you’ll respond to celebrating your birthday. You can barely hear him over the roaring sound of waves colliding with the shoreline and birds peeping in the surf. 
You’re already throwing yourself into Wooyoung’s arms before a moment of silence can pass. You crash into his chest with a crooned sound, a desperate cry of joy. 
“Yes!” You finally croak, the word sounding more like a sob than an agreement. “Yes, I like it!”
Wooyoung laughs happily as he wraps his arms around your waist, burying his face into the crook of your neck with a joyful sound. His chest vibrates with his laughter and you love the way it feels against your body. One of your hands slides out from between you and you urgently grasp ahold of Yeosang’s shirt and tug him into your pile with a quick movement. San follows soon after, lured in by Wooyoung’s touch and suddenly you’re buried beneath a mountain of Ateez’s warmth. 
Another wet sob leaves your lips, but it’s much closer to a laugh this time. 
“I love it…” 
And we love you. 
He doesn’t say it aloud, but Wooyoung hopes you hear it anyway. 
Seonghwa lets out a hearty laugh despite it sounding wet with his own tears, and he wraps an arm around Hongjoong’s shoulders as he tugs his captain close. The leader’s eyes are watery as he and the archer pile into your embrace. Mingi and Yunho follow quickly after, with the tallest of the two reaching out to snag Jongho’s tunic. The youngest is already moving, sliding beneath Yeosang’s arm to nuzzle into the healer’s side. One of his hands nestles between his lover’s ribs, resting atop your bicep. You push closer into their hands, warm and happy and still softly crying. 
You love it. 
It cannot possibly get any better than this. Not even the comforting breeze of the ocean air brushing over your skin nor the warmth of any roaring campfire could rival this feeling. There’s no warmth in the world that can surmount the heat of Ateez embracing you. Their hands carefully sweeping over skin leaves trails of pleasant heat in their wake, and the throb of your aching heart is only soothed by a soft coo leaving San’s lips. Wooyoung slides a hand over your head, pulling you closer into his neck, and you feel a bigger hand – Yunho’s, you know – scratch gently over your scalp. Another settles onto your hip, rubbing gentle circles into the bone. They’re Seonghwa’s, you recognize the calluses on his two fingers when they brush over the skin of your bare hip. Mingi’s hand settles across your back, resting between your shoulder blades. His firm touch and big hands are easy to decipher. Jongho’s wrap around your arm, strong and steadfast, just like you know him to be. Your captain’s smaller hand finds your fingers, sliding between them as you grip onto San with a fierce grip. 
Hongjoong’s hands tremble when he twists his grip to drag a line down your left ring finger. His gaze finds yours, a watery smile on his lips when your mouth parts in shock and your one eye dilated beyond comprehension. The Captain finishes drawing the line at the tip of your nail, where each of his fingers meets the end of each of yours. Then Hongjoong slides his hand into yours and squeezes three times. 
Yunho must have taught him that one. 
Because no one else has ever uttered those words to you – least of all meant them. 
Your grip tightens fervently, pulling until you can press Hongjoong’s hand into your chest and let him feel the racing pulse of your heart. It slams into your ribs with a thunderous pace, beating in a pattern you hope he can discern. You pull your head from Wooyoung’s neck just slightly. Just enough to lean down and press your lips to Hongjoong’s fingers. 
You hope he knows what it means. 
He does. 
“Happy birthday, tiny,” Yunho murmurs into the shared space between the nine of you. “We’re so happy you’re here.” 
You weep. 
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Ateez spends three nights and four days at the beach. 
On the first, you don’t have the courage to venture too far into the shore. The roaring of waves crashing onto the sand is intimidating when you don’t know how to swim. You settle for watching the others splash and wrestle in the shallow sea. Their shouts of glee are enough joy to warm your heart. 
You watch Mingi grapple with Hongjoong on the shoreline, huffing softly with a grin when Mingi inevitably gets the upper hand. The guard lifts Hongjoong over his shoulder and laughs deeply as he storms his way towards the sea. 
“Put me down!” Hongjoong roars, smacking his hand against Mingi’s back. “Mingi!” 
The guard only laughs and spins the two of them in the shallows as he wades deeper into the waves. 
“Don’t you dare!” 
You watch as Mingi laughs brightly once more, calling out a “too late!” as he unceremoniously dumps his captain into the sea.  
Hongjoong dunks beneath the water with a roar, and for a moment you worry he won’t emerge again. He does, however, and lurches from the waves with an undignified shout and lunges towards Mingi as he laughs. 
“Get back here!” 
You grin and watch the two continue to wrestle in the waves. 
Jongho takes you onto the nearby rocks and shows you the wonders of tide pools. He and Yeosang spent years living by the sea, and he murmurs hundreds of little facts about each of the animals he can find. Crouching down by a shallow pool, Jongho reaches into the cool water and ever so carefully lifts a sea star from the water. He cradles it delicately, leaving it half submerged as he pulls you closer with his other hand. 
“This is a sea star,” he whispers, looking up at you and gesturing for you to crouch beside him. “You want to feel? You won’t hurt it.” 
 When you crouch at his side, Jongho pulls your hand towards him with a smile. Bent at the knees, you lean into his side and watch with a bated breath and marvel at the texture of the sea star still carefully held in Jongho’s hands. It’s soft and squishy beneath your delicate touch and you huff a smile as you watch with a mystified expression. 
You watch some of the tiny feet of the sea star wiggle in Jongho’s hand and whip your head over to face him with a question on your lips. 
Jongho is already looking at you, watching you instead of the sea star in his hands. He’s smiling, softly and sweetly, his eyes fixed on your one eye. They drift from your left one to where your right would be if not hidden behind the mask, then he drops them to your lips. Your breath stutters and you swallow shyly before Jongho lifts his eyes back to your own. 
He smiles, as if nothing happened and continues, “See the poky creatures down here? The ones that look like they have needles? Those are urchins. The sea stars will eat those.” 
It takes more effort than you’d like to admit to pull your gaze away from Jongho’s face. 
At another tidal pool, Jongho points out a creature he calls an anemone. The vibrant teal and green color of its shape mystifies you and you lean closer to investigate it. Listening carefully to Jongho’s explanation of the anemone, you look back up at him with a question in your eyes. 
“Yeah, you can touch that one too. Be careful though.” 
You don’t understand his warning but carefully drop your hand into the pool to delicately caress the anemone anyway. The chill waters surround your skin and you lean closer to touch the creature, you let out a startled squeal when its sticky tentacles wrap themselves around your finger. Surprised, you lurch away from the pool, confusion in your face and hands braced on the rock beside you. 
Jongho laughs so hard you think he might choke. 
You turn to look at him with furrowed brows and an upset pout on your lips, a little disgruntled Jongho didn’t tell you that would happen. 
The youngest continues to laugh at the utter confusion in your expression, finally bracing himself against you and apologizing. 
“Sorry, I’m sorry, Bug. I couldn’t help myself!” 
You frown and push gently at his chest, posing a little miffed at Jongho’s teasing. The youngest snorts and pulls you closer to his chest, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. 
“I won’t do it again, I promise,” he laughs. “We should wash your hands though, the stingers on those anemones can leave toxins on your skin. I don’t want you to touch your face without cleaning your hands first.”
You huff and nod, letting him lead you away from the rocks and towards the others. When you find San, you race away from Jongho and bury yourself into his chest with a pretend pout. The healer wraps you up in his embrace without question, turning to look at Jongho with a raised brow. Jongho rolls his eyes and laughs. 
Seonghwa and Wooyoung take you to collect shells in the afternoon. 
Your footprints linger in the sand behind you as you hold the archer’s hand and walk along the shoreline. The sand is packed beneath your feet closer to the shore and you find that there are all sorts of different shells just above the water line. 
You recognize some of the larger, smoother shells Yeosang and San use to store medicine sometimes. They’re scallop-shaped and hollow in the middle, and the healers like to use them for creams or other ointments. Seonghwa helps you carry some back to the healers who gratefully pile your collection into one of their packs. They can always use more shells in the medical cavern. 
Further down the beach, you find a plethora of smaller shells and drop down into the sand to rummage through them. There’s hundreds of them, some twisting into points and others round at the edges. Some are still split into pieces and others are still whole. Some are closed like a locket. Seonghwa tells you to leave those ones alone – there’s still creatures living in those ones. You gasp and carefully set the shell back down into the sand ever so delicately. The archer smiles fondly at your care for the earth and her creatures. 
One of the bigger shells that washes up on the shore catches your attention, and you rush over to the pristine, cream colored object. Yeosang called these conches. When you excitedly turn over the shell, you’re startled to find a spiny looking creature inside. A large claw grazes your hand and your heart lurches. 
You shout in surprise, jerking away from the shell with a gasp. 
“Bug?!” 
Seonghwa is at your side in an instant, hands on your back and pulling you away from the shell. “What happened?” 
 He doesn’t know why you shouted at first, too worried something has hurt you. His hands slide across your shoulders, turning you to face him and urgently scanning you for injuries. But when he looks down at the crab claw emerging from the shell, Seonghwa feels his chest shake with quiet laughter. Your head jerks back to look at the archer.
“It’s alright, darling. You just startled the crab living inside this one. He won’t hurt you, honey.”
Each shell you turn over for the rest of the day is done carefully and gently, and Seonghea feels his heart tug affectionately at how cute you look doing so. You nudge one with a stick to see if any claws come out and Seonghwa has to bury his smile in Wooyoung’s shoulder. 
“She’s so precious,” the warrior murmurs under his breath. 
Seonghwa hums in agreement, his head lifting from his partner’s shoulder to find you waving them over excitedly. 
“We’re coming, sweetheart!” 
Wooyoung settles at your side with a grin and looks down at the smooth stones in your hands. There’s a few rocks mixed in with the more ornate looking shells you’ve gathered, and Wooyoung tilts his head in an attempt to decipher why you’ve called them over. 
“What’s goin’ on?” 
Seonghwa’s heart stutters at the beaming smile on your lips. You smile more and this is not the first he’s ever seen, but each time you look up at him with that grin on your face, Seonghwa feels his stomach flutter and pride swell from his gut. He almost bites down on his bottom lip to resist sending you back a grin of his own, but Seonghwa doesn’t. And he’s grateful he does, because the way your one eye crinkles with joy when he smiles down at you makes his cheeks burn and his skin tingle. 
“Look!” You urgently whisper, swallowing around the word to repress how sore your throat is. 
Directing his attention to the dark stones in your hands, Seonghwa’s brows furrow in confusion. 
“I don’t understand.” 
You lift the stone beside his face, pulling Wooyoung into your side as you do. The two of you face Seonghwa as the archer grows more confused. The dark brown, near ebony-colored stone is lifted just beside his temple and you watch with a marveled expression as you shift your gaze from the rock to his eyes. 
“What is it?” Seonghwa urges. 
Wooyoung grins, his teeth flashing as he laughs sweetly. His two-toned hair ruffles in the breeze and Wooyoung turns to face you, squeezing your hip as he slides an arm around you. 
“That’s a good find, Bug,” he murmurs, looking back up at Seonghwa with honey in his gaze. “The same shade as his eyes. It matches him perfectly.” 
You nearly vibrate with happiness, wiggling a little in Wooyoung’s arms as Seonghwa’s eyes crinkle. “Really?” 
You nod fervently, reaching for his hand and dropping the smooth stone into his hand and curling his fingers around it. Seonghwa holds the rock carefully, not looking away from your one eye as he lifts it to press into his heart. 
“Thank you, darling.” 
You smile again, just a little twitch of your lips and nod. Then you turn to Wooyoung and weasel your way out of his grip to hold another up for him. This stone is a similar shade as Seonghwa’s, but just different enough that Seonghwa can see where you’ve matched this one to the exact hue of Wooyoung’s umber irises. 
You hold it out to Wooyoung with a tilt of your head and Wooyoung has to resist the urge to lean forward and squish your cheeks. He’s rarely seen you so excited – so… at ease. It makes every muscle in his body eager with the urge to hold you close and squeeze you tight. 
“For me?”
You nod excitedly and Wooyoung accepts the stone with a skip of his pulse. “Thank you, baby.” 
He and Seonghwa exchange looks and Wooyoung slips the stone into his pocket, where he knows he’ll keep it safe. 
“Help me?” You whisper softly, gesturing to the plethora of stones and shells beneath you. “For the others.” 
“Of course.” 
The two help you find six more stones, one of each of the other members of Ateez. Each one is the exact shade of their eyes – colors you know by heart. 
Wooyoung cannot tell you that after the trip, the rest of the boys gather to look at the stones and shells you collected for them. He doesn’t tell you that Mingi finds some twine and they braid bands for each other, carefully depositing their gifts onto string and binding them to each other’s wrists. 
On the first night, the nine of you sleep around a bonfire. 
The crackling flames keep you warm from the evening’s cool breeze, but you don’t think you sleep at all. The excitement and pure glee from the day keeps you awake. Adrenaline still roars through your veins and you settle for watching the stars for a moment longer. You find the twinkling shape of Polaris easily, and whisper your thanks up at her, just like you do every night since Jongho pointed her out. 
She winks back. 
The fire continues to crackle and the smell of wood burning soothes your nerves. Eventually, you pull yourself from your bed roll, carefully maneuvering away from Yunho’s warm chest and wrap your blanket around your shoulders. Quietly, you make your way over to the massive piece of driftwood facing the shore. 
Then, you drop silently beside Mingi, who sits and watches the sea. It’s technically his watch, but the guard faces the ocean as if he cannot bring himself to look away. 
Mingi does not startle when you find your place at his side, only shifting slightly to allow you to get comfortable. As you settle, you scooch as close as you can towards Mingi’s broad chest. Your side presses into his as you rest your weight against him and Mingi smiles, still looking at the sea. He easily accommodates your weight and wraps an arm around your shoulder, covering both your forms with his blanket. You snuggle close, burying your face into his neck and continue to watch the waves crash against the shore as the moon illuminates their peaks. 
You sit there for hours. Though you cannot sleep, excitement still pumping through your body, you find staying awake with Mingi is just as nice. Far more comforting, you’d even say. Mingi’s body heat keeps you pleasantly warm and his big arm stays wrapped around your waist. Soon after you settle, the guard drops his cheek onto your head and he breathes slow and deep. 
Even when Yeosang relieves him of his shift, taking over his place for watch, Mingi remains still. The two of you stay there until neither of you can keep your slowly fluttering lids open any longer. 
Yunho finds the two of you in the morning, and he kisses Mingi awake with a sweet grin and soft eyes. He brushes a hand through your hair and drops a kiss onto your head, eventually dropping onto your other side where he wraps an arm around both you and Mingi as the three of you watch the sunrise. 
The second day, you finally find the courage to venture into the waves with San and Yunho at your sides. Yeosang stands in the waves, waiting for you. 
San leads the way, walking backwards into the surf and holding both your hands. Yunho stands beside you, one of his arms reaching out to steady you and reassure you that he’s still there. You make eye contact with Yeosang and he winks at you. The honey-haired healer grew up in the sea. You know that if anything goes wrong, Yeosang will know what to do. 
“Let’s go, tiny. You’ve got this,” Yunho encourages, softly nudging you forward as you apprehensively toe the water line. 
You can’t swim. And you’ve never ventured into the sea before. 
It’s a little daunting, but the dimples on San’s cheeks and the smile on his lips encourages you to keep walking. You clutch his hands with a vice grip and gasp as the cold, salty waves cascade over your toes. 
“Sorry, lovebug. It’s a little cold.”
San laughs as you throw him a withering look. That information would have been helpful before you stepped into the sea. Yeosang laughs at your side, rubbing a hand along your waist and watching you shiver at the warmth of his touch. 
No matter how many times they touch you, you cannot help the way it makes you feel. 
“A little further and we can stop,” San murmurs, squeezing your hand when you stumble in the sand and pulling you closer. “C’mon, baby.” 
A few steps further and you stand at Yeosang’s side, digging your toes into the plush sand beneath your feet and marveling at how the waves lap at your knees. It’s cold, but you don’t mind since it’s a reprieve from the midday sun. When you turn your back to the sea, a strong wave pushes you closer to San and he laughs when you stumble into his chest. Water splashes upwards, and you get your first taste of seawater. 
“Woah!” San laughs, steadying you by the waist and watching as you stick your tongue out with an indignant sound. He can’t help the way laughter bubbles from his chest. You look positively betrayed by the ocean, as if the taste of salt on your tongue personally offends you. 
Yunho and Yeosang dissolve into giggles behind San, leaning onto each other to support themselves. Your one eye narrows and you shoot them an angry look, but San thinks you look more like an angry, wet cat than anything scary. Of course, he would never tell you that.
“I’m sorry, Bug!” Yunho laughs. “You just look so funny!” 
San listens to you grumble something under your breath, something that sounds like ‘showing him something funny,’ and then you bend at the waist and splash a mountain of water in his direction. 
Yunho guffaws at the betrayal and San dissolves into his own laughter, bending at the waist and bracing a hand on his chest as he cackles. Your grin is positively menacing, Yeosang decides. He wonders if you’ll become as much of a brat as Wooyoung if this continues. 
Yunho, now drenched in salt water and wet hair dripping into his eyes, enacts revenge and lunges towards you. San, ever the sweetheart, throws himself in between you and Yunho and the two sink into the waves with smiles. 
Eventually, when your skin begins to wrinkle from the time you spend in the waves and the sun begins to set, Yeosang and you step away from the shore to settle against the same piece of driftwood that marks your temporary camp. Yeosang sits atop the log and you lay just below him on the sand. You lean against his leg, just watching the rest of the boys continue to dance and swim in the surf. The sound of their laughter makes your heart happy and their gleaming smiles leave a grin of your own on your lips. 
It’s nice – smiling again, you mean. It’s a gift from Ateez they have not realized they’ve given, but you take care to treasure it regardless. 
You wrap an arm around Yeosang’s tattooed calf, your fingers occasionally dragging along the pattern of thorns that descend from his thigh. They wind around his leg, ending at the bone of his ankle and you’ve seldom been able to keep your hands away from the obsidian ink since he showed you. This, of course, is much to Yeosang’s delight, and the honey-haired healer can barely resist the way he beams so brightly when your delicate hands skim across his tattoos again. He loves it when you touch him. 
Mingi and Seonghwa leave the shoreline after a few minutes. They step away from the water to stoke the bonfire at the center of your makeshift camp. The flickering amber hues dance along burning bark and release a pleasant aroma onto the beach. You inhale deeply and lean further into Yeosang, humming happily when one of his hands reaches out to scratch along your scalp. 
Head scratches have become one of your weaknesses, you suppose. All it takes is for one of them to run their nails along your head and you’ll sink into their embrace with a happy sigh and mushy bones. 
When Mingi is satisfied with the roar of the campfire, he and Seonghwa press kisses to Yeosang’s hair and brush fingers over your hairline as they pace back towards the shore. 
A harmonious shout of glee leaves San’s lips as Jongho tackles him into the shallow surf, and there’s an uproar of laughter from amongst the boys. San shouts something along the lines of being cold and twists in the waves in an attempt to pin Jongho beneath him. Jongho, easily the strongest of the nine of you, maintains his place above San but spits salt water out of his mouth in surprise when his partner douses him with a splash. In revenge, Jongho prepares to dunk San’s head beneath the water, only to be tackled into the sea by Yunho. The youngest lets out a squawk of surprise as he sinks into the water and the laughter begins again. 
You turn your head towards Yeosang, resting your cheek against his knee and looking up at him with your one eye. You nudge him gently with your knuckles, drawing his attention to you. 
“Are you going to join them?” 
The honey-haired healer barely catches your question over the cacophony in the surf, but he smiles at the sound of your voice. He slides a hand deeper into your hair and scratches against the nape of your neck, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth when your eye flutters shut briefly. 
His eyes, chocolate brown and gleaming with the flicker of flames before you, are warm and strong. They look down at you like you’re the only thing he sees – the only thing he wants to see. 
It’s familiar. This moment is too. 
Shivering gently from the weight of his gaze and bones feeling mushy and warm, you look up at Yeosang and wait patiently for his answer. 
“No, not yet,” he whispers in return, expression soft and eyes tender. “I’m very happy where I am right now.” 
You inhale deeply through your nose, recalling when he spoke the same words so long ago. The exhale that shudders through your lungs is accompanied by the sound of Yeosang’s deep, honey-sweet voice. 
“I‘m happy here with you.” 
He finally has the courage to say it. 
You look away from Yeosang so he doesn’t see the water welling in your lone eye. The stroke of thanks you brush across his skin is enough to let him know what you mean. The swell of electricity zinging beneath your skin leaves you breathless and you lean into Yeosang’s legs to combat the shift in emotion. 
The healer hums sweetly in response, unable to look away from you. He examines you as you watch his partners, lifting his head when another uproar of laughter erupts when Hongjoong overpowers Wooyoung in whatever game they’re playing in the waves. 
But when you glance back at Yeosang shyly, you see it. 
You see the way he looks at you now. 
With stars in his gaze and affection glimmering in the shine of his irises, you see the way Yeosang’s features melt so sweetly as he watches you. He looks at you the way he looks at them; like he’s staring at his very heart and soul – like there’s nothing else in the world he’d rather gaze upon than your face warmed by the flicker of roaring flames and your one eye finally staring back into his. No apprehension, this time. No fear or confusion or worry or an amalgamation of all of them together. You just… look back at him. 
Just like how he looks at you. 
When Seonghwa and Mingi rejoin the parade, kicking up salt water and spinning through the shallows, the boys cheer gleefully and begin to dance. It’s chaotic and a mess of stumbling and laughter, but it’s dancing nonetheless. The sound of their joy is infectious and spreads along the beach until it reaches you and Yeosang.
But he’s not listening to them. He’s listening to you. His ears are trained on the sound that erupts from his feet, bubbling from your lips in a noise he’s been praying to hear. 
Laughter. 
You’re laughing. 
There’s this bright, heart-stopping smile spread across your lips as you look up at Yeosang and listen to your family dance on the beach. Your shoulders shake softly with the movement of your laughter, and Yeosang can feel the vibrations of your chest pressed against his leg. It starts as a muffled giggle, barely concealed by your smile, but it deepens into a hearty laugh from deep in your belly. 
He cannot tear his eyes from you. 
You laugh. 
You laugh and you look up at him with stars in your eyes and his heart in your hands, and it takes every fiber of his strength not to lean forward and drown himself in the taste of your lips. It’s all he wants – all he needs, he swears it. One taste of your lips would sate him for life, even though he knows he’d never be able to tear himself away again. 
When you lean upwards, grabbing ahold of his fingers and pulling them towards you, Yeosang’s mouth parts to suck in a breath. 
You kiss his fingers. 
By the Gods, maybe that was a lie. One kiss would never be enough to sate him – there would never be enough of your touch or your kisses that could ever appease his soul. Even if he were immortal and your paths intertwined until the last of the stars burned from the sky, not even then would he have enough of you. 
You laugh again, grinning up at Yeosang with a toothy smile and the corner of your mouth digging into your mask. If he wasn’t already sitting, he swears he would drop to his knees at your side. 
He loves it – the sounds of your laughter. No matter how raw or croaked the sound is, he adores it. The sound of your voice once made his heart race with glee, but this… This is different. 
It’s so much more. 
This is joy. Unbridled and unashamed and so clearly you. It’s your laughter, your glee, your happiness that sinks beneath his sin and lights his nerves on fire. It’s your smile and your giggles that make his heart swell. Yeosang adores it. He adores you. 
He cannot help the way he slides off the driftwood log and into the sand at your side. Yeosang is pulling you into his chest before you can question his actions. He wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls your head into his neck, pressing you as tight to his chest as he possibly can. 
“You’re laughing…” he whispers as he huffs in disbelief. “Bug! You’re laughing!” 
The second time Yeosang utters the phrase, it’s shouted cheerfully as he squeezes you tight into his chest. His heart thumps brazenly beneath his ribs, and he can feel the pulse of yours against his own. You giggle again, wiggling to readjust yourself as you sink into the honey of his embrace. Yeosang’s heart trills excitedly again. 
Yunho’s head darts upwards from the beach, startled by Yeosang’s call. 
“What?” 
San hears Yunho’s whispered disbelief and stands from the surf, attention drawn over towards you and Yeosang. “What did he just say?” 
“It’s Bug,” Hongjoong answers, standing behind Yunho with his eyes blown wide. His heart stutters once in his chest as he takes in the sight of your shoulders shaking gently with your giggles. He can’t hear the sound of them, but Gods does he wish he could. “Bug’s laughing.” 
“Holy shit…” 
Yunho takes off from the beach without another word. He doesn’t even hear who curses.
Sand kicks up from his feet as he sprints towards you and Yeosang with his heart in his throat and a watery grin on his lips. He doesn’t even need to turn around to know that San is the one on his heels. Yunho knows the sound of San’s muffled sobs just as well as he knows the beat of his heart. Wooyoung is not far behind, a bubble of laughter leaving his lips and a chain missing from his wrist. Nothing binds him to that place anymore. You set him free. 
Hongjoong and Mingi chase after the others, and the Captain manages to get some revenge for the day before as he shoves his guard into the surf on the way. Hongjoong’s mirthful chuckles as Mingi shouts are heard when Jongho pulls Seonghwa behind him, urging the archer to move faster. 
“Bug!” 
Your head pulls from Yeosang’s neck, that toothy grin still on your face just as Yunho collides with you and the honey-haired healer. The two of you sway as Yunho’s weight sinks into your figures, but Yeosang sets an arm down into the sand to support you. The black and white strands of San and Wooyoung’s hair drip with salt water as they throw themselves onto Yunho’s lap with a shout. Mingi follows just after, likely having passed Hongjoong on the beach with the length of his strides. He shakes his wet hair as he clings onto Yunho’s back and Wooyoung complains despite the fact that he’s already soaking wet. The giggly sound of Mingi’s laughter makes you chuckle again.
You laugh, as if it’s as easy as breathing. 
Yeosang watches, his eyes welling with happy tears as he continues to cling onto you with one hand. He watches you giggle and the others pile into your space and listens to his new favorite sound. 
Gods, he adores you. He adores them – this family. 
Yunho is crying, his lip wobbling as he buries his head into your hair. He’s at your back, chest shaking with the sound of his watery sobs. 
“Tiny…” he cries, but it’s a happy weep. You reach around to cling onto one of his hands. Yunho squeezes you tight, stealing the air right from your lungs, but you don’t need it. You would happily breathe in the pure euphoria of this moment instead. “Tiny, you’re laughing.” 
San buries his wet hair into your lap with a joyful sound and the giggles commence again. The healer’s heart throbs so strongly but so pleasantly he thinks it will burst. You have a laugh that makes others laugh with you. Just like Wooyoung, he realizes. 
Your other hand drops from Yeosang’s back to brush through San’s hair once and the healer looks up at you with glimmering half-moon eyes and a dimple poking out of his cheek. You allow your finger to poke the sweet little spot this time. His cheek muscles ache from how big his smile is. San nuzzles closer to your stomach and you let yourself shiver pleasantly, far too happy to deny yourself the joy of this moment. 
You’re pretty, San thinks to himself. So pretty. Especially when you laugh. 
Wooyoung melts into Hongjoong’s side and the Captain wraps an arm around his shoulder. They stand just behind Yunho, burying their happy tears into each other as Seonghwa pulls them close. Mingi and Jongho sink into the sand behind Yunho and pull each other tight. The taller guard squeezes his eyes shut and presses his lips into Jongho’s forehead, desperately hoping all his adoration is conveyed through the kiss. Jongho reaches out to squeeze Yunho’s shoulder and rests his weight against his elder’s back. 
“I know,” you finally whisper into the space that separates you and Yunho. “I’m happy.” 
One hand lifts to pull the mask away from your face. Without a moment’s hesitation, your nimble fingers detangle the knot from behind you, and you drop the obsidian mask into the sand. A hand wraps around your fingers when you finally let it go. Someone draws a line along the length of your left ring finger and twines their fingers with your own. They squeeze three times. 
You repeat the gesture, tracing a finger down the fourth finger on their left hand, right over the thin, dark band you know is tattooed there. You squeeze their hand three times. This sign needs no translation. 
You open both eyes. 
“I’m so happy.” 
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bonus:
stranger: so who would you choose; ateez or–
reader: ateez.
stranger: you didn't even let me finish, ateez or–
reader, not missing a beat: ateez. I choose ateez.
a/n: This currently takes place sometime after the main storyline (probably xD) so it accounts for the boys knowing parts of Bug’s past (not revealed but it’s mentioned they know). For now, I won't consider these oneshots canon simply because I won’t know where it fits in the timeline HAHA xD this is essentially just a little bit of fluffy comfort for those who have been missing Bug and the boys! I’m catching up on their story but I hope you enjoy this filler for now <33 ALSO disclaimer, don’t pick stuff out of tide pools! my marine biologist family is screaming at me for including that xD just leave the creatures alone in their habitats!
sorry if bug seems a little ooc here! Loren and I have decided that bug goes from black cat energy to golden retriever after enough time with atz :’))) This is supposed to take place sometime in the future where she’s healed a little more and is a little more curious and open. There are a lot of references to things that have yet to happen in ltm so this is kind of a teaser for those xD 
also shoutout to the loml @eightmakesonebraincell for the majority of the ideas in this :D she's a real one xD
taglist: *If you don't see your name on this taglist, you may have been removed if your tag doesn't work :( let me know if you don't see your name and I'll try to see what we can do to fix it :D
@verseoks @smallfrye @istgcyj @rensunjun @flowrsforfun @justchaoticwhispers @gayliljoong @http-lovelyknow @kpopnightingale @rielleluvs @queentiti72 @paralumanniluna @chittaphonstar @dear-dreamie @bangtanxberm @havetaeminforbreakfast @knucklesdeepmingi @pingyu-in-wonderland @5sos-wdw @atzcoke @ddeonghwva @sophxom @khjcoo @sunukissed @becauseiloveyunho @atinymonbebestay @goldenstarmermaid @simplyaghostsworld @multifandomizer @yeosangs-left-ass-cheek @revehosh @mysticfire0435 @side-angel @taestrwbrry @billboard-singer @jenseok17 @parkthothwa8 @jcngh0-hq @dream-in-progress @dees-writing-corner @frankenstein852 @darkdayelixer @ateezkeepmysoul @maruskz @ahhhhhhhhhghh @honeyhotteoks @simeonswhore @jxxngieteez
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sweetiesicheng · 3 months ago
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ateez - home
seonghwa x reader; the rest of the guys are close to y/n too
word count : 6,745
this is the most i’ve written for one writing, and i hope everyone likes it ~
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the first phone call doesn't go through. the second call doesn't go through. you try a different phone number, but it doesn't work. you try another one and hope once again.
this call finally goes through. "hello?"
you cough, "san. i need help," you manage to speak. "please. just please help me," you cry.
"y/n, i...i can't help you," san says to you. both of you know you're not supposed to be in contact.
you're sitting on the ground in an alley. a light flickers off and on. the smell of alcohol and trash is pungent.
"i can't call an ambulance. you know that," you say to him. "i'm screwed, san. you know i wouldn't call if i wasn't desperate," you add.
"you went off on your own again?" san asks. you hum to answer. "y/n, you're not with anyone anymore. why would you go fight people when no one can protect you?"
"i need money. i can't work a normal job. i can't live a normal life," you say to him, "i can't live like this anymore. i don't know what to do." san doesn't reply, making you check the phone to see if it died or ran out of minutes. you still have a lot of time and enough battery left. "san?"
"i'm sorry, y/n. you can't come back."
the call ends without any proper salutation, leaving you feeling hopeless.
it takes awhile for you to push yourself up from the ground and leave the alley. it's became apparent to you that you should at least find shelter.
the area of the city you're in is controlled by a rival mafia. the nearest territory that you can go to belongs to ateez, a group you used to be apart of. however, you were disowned after a stupid incident.
you're deep into the enemy territory. at least an hour and a half away by foot until you could get out of the side of town you're in. unfortunately, members of the rival mafia are still looking for you. you're praying to whoever that you stay alive just long enough to get out of the territory.
after awhile, you lost track of time, but you end up in a church, laying on a bench. you only wanted to rest a bit since you needed to try to get out of the territory as fast as you could, but almost everything in your body is in pain.
as you lay there, you hear a door open and freeze. you have your jacket covering most of your head to block the few lights that are on and hope that it's just someone who runs the church passing through. if it isn't someone who works in the church, then you hope whoever it is will think that you're homeless.
the person's steps are clear and crisp. it doesn't take long for you to realize that the person is walking closer and closer to where you are. you continue to stay still and hope that they will just walk away.
unfortunately, the person stops near you. you can hear them sit down on the bench since it squeaks.
"let's go, y/n," san speaks.
"why did you come?" you manage to ask after waiting for a few moments.
all of a sudden, your jacket is taken off of you. you shiver since it's cold and notice san right next to you.
"i'm not heartless," san answers. "you know all of us care about you, but we both know that you're supposed to never be seen with any of us ever again."
you stay silent for a few seconds before speaking, "i'm sorry..." you mutter.
san looks at your almost curled up form, noticing the cuts and bruises on your arms. he's afraid to check for any other injuries despite wanting to make sure you're okay. he takes your jacket off of his lap and halfheartedly tosses it on you, landing on your torso.
"let's go," he repeats and stands up. he starts walking away from you.
you put your jacket on and throw the hood on. you hope he didn't see the cut on your cheek, caused by a higher ranked enemy days ago. it'd only make him worry more. you stand up from the bench and follow san out of the church.
you expect to see san's car right outside, but you see yunho's car instead. yunho leans against his car, and you accidentally lock eyes with him. you quickly look away but see unfamiliar cars down the road.
yunho opens the back passenger door while san gets in the front passenger seat.
"ignore them," san instructs you before closing the door. you do so and get in the car. yunho walks around to get in the driver's seat and immediately drives off when his car starts up.
"they're following us," yunho mentions. you look through the rear view mirror and see the two cars.
"they'll probably stop once we leave," san says to him.
you look out of the window until yunho drives out of their territory. the other cars stop following you after some time. he passes through a shopping district as well as financial district before making it to ateez's territory.
"where have you been staying?" yunho asks you.
"a hostel," you answer. "it's near the train station."
"we'll bring you there, okay?" he says to you. you don't respond, but yunho starts driving in the direction of the hostel.
when you reach the hostel, the car stops right in front of the building. you open the door and get out, not even bothering to say anything to san or yunho. you close the door and start walking toward the hostel, digging into your pockets to find the money you had stolen earlier.
"give me a minute," yunho says to san as they watch you approach the building.
"yea," san replies.
yunho gets out of the car and hurries over to you. "y/n," he calls out and you turn to look at him. "do you need more money?" he asks.
"i have enough," you answer.
yunho looks at your form, finally noticing some bruises on your neck and a cut on your face.
"take this," he says, reaching into his pocket to take his wallet out. he pulls some cash out. "buy some bandages and ointments, okay?" he says.
you realize that he's noticed your injuries and look down at the ground. "don't. i'll be fine," you say and turn around. "i'm sorry," you apologize before walking into the hostel.
yunho just watches you, making sure he can't see you anymore before returning to the car. san had been watching both of you from inside the car, knowing that this probably wouldn't be the last time they would see you.
"she got into another fight," yunho says to san, even though he knows san had talked to her earlier. "there's a cut on her face. she wouldn't even let me give her money for bandages."
"drive, yunho," san instructs. yunho sighs before driving away from the hostel. "why would she call us again? if boss finds her, she'll be dead."
"maybe we should leave—"
"you know it's not that easy. most of us owe our lives to him. both of us do," san interrupts with a reminder.
"where were you?" wooyoung asks when san enters the room.
"out," san simply answers and heads to a liquor cabinet in the room. "anything happen while i was gone?" he asks.
"no orders, but me and mingi might go mess around with whoever we can find downtown," wooyoung replies. "wanna come with?" he offers.
san pours a bit of bourbon into a glass. he shakes his head, "not tonight. you guys be careful out there. borders are being watched," he says.
"thanks for the heads up," wooyoung replies and stands up from his seat on a couch. "see ya."
"see ya."
san sits down on an armchair with the glass of bourbon still in his hand. he takes a few sips at a time before taking one last gulp and puts the now empty glass on a side table.
i'm sorry.
yunho stands outside on a balcony, feeling guilty. he hopes that you'll be okay and hopes that his boss, your former boss, won't find out about tonight's interaction.
he takes out a prepaid phone from his pocket and calls the phone number for the prepaid cell that you have. he knows it by heart, just like all the other phone numbers you used to have. after all, he's the one that had paid for the prepaid phones in the past.
"hello?" a guy speaks.
"who is this?" yunho immediately asks, confused as to why he hears a man's voice instead of yours.
"sorry, but your friend sold this to me," the guy says. "needed the money."
"you know y/n? is she there?" yunho asks.
"don't know her name. is she the one with the scar on her face?" the guy asks.
"is she there?" yunho asks again.
"nope. took off after giving her jacket to another kid here and paying off her stay. listen, i'd help but i wanted to call my kids before the minutes run out," the guy says.
"thanks for the help," yunho says before hanging up. "fuck," he curses out loud before texting hongjoong, saying that he needed to go out again.
once he gets the okay from hongjoong, he leaves the mansion and drives back to the hostel. it's really late into the night, so he hopes he can find you quickly. when yunho makes it to the hostel, he starts walking around the streets looking for you.
eventually, he finds himself at a pier, seeing boats lined up and lamps illuminating the boardwalk. he starts walking along the boardwalk but stops when he sees people lined up to get onto a boat. he looks and realizes that you're one of the people trying to get onto the boat.
"y/n!" you jump when you hear you name called and whip your head to see yunho running towards you. "what are you doing here? why aren't you at the hostel?" he questions.
"i...i can't stay there anymore. i owed them money, i didn't have enough to stay another night," you answer before looking at the person who runs the boat, hoping they'd wait for you.
"what are you doing here at the pier?" yunho asks.
"to work somewhere..." you answer.
yunho looks at the people on the boat and starts dragging you away.
"yunho, stop!" you yell at him as he pulls you with him. "stop it!"
when you make it back to the street, yunho grabs your shoulders. "i'm not letting you get onto that. who knows what you would have to do! i can give you money. why didn't you let me give you any?" he questions you.
"what am i supposed to do, yunho? i can't keep asking you for anything. i was just going to work on cargo ship," you say to him. you're panicking, trying to figure out what went wrong. did the guy call yunho's number? did yunho call the prepaid phone number?
"you're going to be stuck in the middle of the ocean for god knows how long. i'm not letting you do that," he says. "you're coming with me. i'll make sure boss doesn't find out."
you start to freak out even more, "what? yunho, stop. what if he's there? i can't go to the mansion with you."
"look at you! you need medical attention!" he yells at you. "boss isn't even in the city right now. it'll be fine for a few days. i promise," he says in attempt to persuade you.
you think to yourself for a second before speaking again. "are you sure?" you ask, finally giving in.
yunho hugs you tightly, "yea. i'm sure."
"it's been awhile," yeosang says to you while he treat your wounds. you look at the ground, too afraid to look up at him or the solider in the room. "leave the room," he instructs the solider.
he had sensed your hesitation the instant yumho had brought you into the room. you tend to show fear in your face when you're scared. all of the guys know that.
the guard leaves but the hesitation still doesn't leave you.
"y/n, it's me. you don't have to tense up around me," yeosang says to you. you continue to stare at the ground, leaving yeosang to sigh. yeosang cleans up your wounds and wraps them as necessary.
the room is silent. yeosang focuses on making sure your wounds are taken care of. it pains his heart to see anyone he cares for look like this.
"seonghwa knows you're here," yeosang mentions. you tense up and yeosang notices. "calm down. you can stay here for now. i want to make sure you don't get an infection from any of the cuts. don't worry about anything else."
"thanks," you finally speak up.
yeosang looks at you and gives you a small smile, "anytime."
"i've never seen her look so small before," wooyoung comments as he and jongho stand by the bed. wooyoung places a bowl of food covered with foil onto the nightstand.
the two had gone to the room you're staying in to check up on you and to bring you a meal. however, you were asleep when they had walked in even though it was already morning.
"yunho said she was at a hostel but left because she didn't have any money left," jongho mentions.
"she doesn't work?" wooyoung questions.
"she's probably too scared to work. i would if i was her. if someone recognizes her, she'll get attacked," jongho says to him before reaching over to move the blanket so its covering some of you. not too much because he knows you get hot quickly. "think seonghwa knows she's here?" he asks wooyoung.
"he knows. he keeps tabs on her," wooyoung replies. "let's go eat. i'll cook more food."
the two leave the room, but once the door closes, you open your eyes. it was impossible to sleep, not because of wooyoung and jongho, but because of the situation you're in.
you move around a bit before sitting up. you turn but immediately jump when you see hongjoong leaning against a wall in the room.
"how long have you been in here?" you question him.
"i came in right after wooyoung and jongho left," he answers. "sorry."
you shake your head, "it's okay." you carefully take the bowl off of the nightstand and take the foil off to see the meal wooyoung had made. it's been a long time since you had a meal cooked by him. "i'm sorry for coming back," you apologize.
"yunho and san filled me in," hongjoong mentions. "i'm fine with it, but boss won't be happy if he finds out. you can't stay here forever."
"i know," you reply. "i'll leave as soon as i can."
"just focus on getting better while you're here, and don't pick a fight with anyone. i'll make sure the soldiers follow orders," hongjoong says before leaving the room to let you eat in peace.
hongjoong walks out of the hallway and heads downstairs. walking down another hallway, he goes into a room and finds seonghwa and mingi in the room. mingi looks at a map while seonghwa goes through some files.
"already planning on taking out people?" he asks seonghwa.
"huh? we are?" mingi asks, turning around to face away from the map. he holds a marker in one hand and a piece of paper with information on the other.
seonghwa takes a sip of his iced tea before placing the glass back onto the table. "just the ones that hurt her," he replies to hongjoong, referring to you.
"you should go see her, hyung," mingi says to him.
"not until this is done," seonghwa immediately replies.
hongjoong sighs and walks over to sit next to his friend. "where should we start?" he asks.
it's been a few days since you came back to the mansion. you've tried to stay clear of any of the guys, but you ended up talking to most of them. they've received a few orders to handle from the boss, so sometimes you've been left alone in the mansion. the few soldiers that you don't recognize had kept their mouths shut of your arrival. after all, gaining loyalty is better than death for the lower-ranked soldiers.
most days, you spend your time in the room. you've gone back and forth to the infirmary and the kitchen just for checkups and meals, but you have been feeling a lot better. bruises have changed colors, indicating healing. some of the cuts have completely scabbed over. your body doesn't feel so sluggish either.
after another day, you lay on the couch in the room.
i should leave soon. boss will find out eventually.
as you think about where to go after you leave the mansion, you hear the door open. you close your eyes and stay still, not wanting to talk to whoever it is.
"hi," he greets.
you open your eyes, knowing that you couldn't avoid this. "what do you want, seonghwa?" you ask.
"am i not allowed to see my girlfriend?" he replies to you.
"ex-girlfriend," you clarify.
"it wasn't by choice. we never officially broke up if you think about it," seonghwa says to you.
"don't remind me," you say and turn away from him. "don't remind me of what a screwup i am." you sound defeated and it makes your ego and heart sting.
"you're not a screwup, y/n. that night just didn't go as planned. boss made everything worst than it should have been," seonghwa says to you.
you turn over and sit up to face seonghwa. "everything was pinned onto me, seonghwa! everything!" you yell at him. tears start falling down from your face, "i have the police against me. i have my family against me. i have an entire city against me. i'm glad you're okay, alright? but you don't know what it's like to be right now. to have your whole life flipped in a split second."
seonghwa sits down on the floor in front of you as he listens to you.
"i have no where to go and no one to rely on. every night, i have to hope that i won't be hurt or killed. you know how many times i've seen some of our soldiers? do you know how many times i've had to run away from them?" you say before swallowing hard. "i was going to leave months ago," you mention, "but part of couldn't leave. and i think it's...because of you." you look straight at seonghwa.
"me?" seonghwa speaks.
"i just wanna be home again," you say to him as more tears fall down, "with you, with the guys."
seonghwa pulls you down from the couch and into his arms. you cry even more in his arms while he holds you tight.
he starts to cry just from hearing you cry. all he wants now is to have you back, but a clear passage is nonexistent.
"i'm sorry, y/n. i should've done something to help you," he apologizes to you. "i'm sorry, baby. i'm sorry i couldn't protect you."
the night lingers on as you and seonghwa hold each other. both of you don't want to let go since it's been a very long time since you held each other. it's as if both of you are afraid this won't happen ever again.
you don't know what will happen to both of you. only the future will tell.
"what the fuck do you mean they're gone?" wooyoung asks yunho.
"i checked y/n's room, and the room was empty. hongjoong said seonghwa wasn't in his and no one has seen him since dinner. but his car is still here," yunho answers as yeosang runs into the room. "hey."
"hey," yeosang huffs out. "i checked some of the stashes, we have some stuff missing but it's disposables. nothing that we care too much about."
"what about the stuff in seonghwa's room?" wooyoung asks.
"hongjoong said some clothes were missing, but he couldn't check everything yet," yunho answers.
"did something happen to them?" yeosang asks, "what if something bad happened?"
"guys," the others turn to look at jongho, who stands on the other side of the room. he looks at the text on his phone screen, "boss is here."
the announcement makes them scared. if a nail was dropped, then you would be able to hear it hit the floor.
yunho takes a deep breath in and out to help calm himself. "hongjoong will handle it. you guys keep looking for them," he says to them. the four of them start to leave the room together before yunho's phone rings. he answers the call, "what?"
"meeting. now," mingi states.
"now?" yunho questions, causing the other three guys to stop and look at him. "i'll be there," he says and hangs up. "you guys go," he says to the three.
yeosang nods, "yea."
yunho starts walking down the hall and reaches the meeting room. he knocks on the door before allowing himself inside, where he finds many capos, but more importantly...boss.
"have you found him?" boss asks.
"no, we haven't," yunho answers. "we don't know where seonghwa went." yunho steps forward to stand next to mingi. next to him is hongjoong and san is on the other end.
the boss sits at the table with his feet on the table. he puts his hands together and eyes all of them. "hongjoong, are you hiding information from me?" he asks. of course he's not buying the fact that one of his best men just disappeared.
"no, i would never," hongjoong answers. "if seonghwa left, then he's gone. he's the best of the best."
boss picks up a small stack of the papers from the table and looks over them. "you boys have been doing good work. keep it up. we'll be expanding our territory soon," he says and stands up. boss walks around the table and starts heading out. someone opens the door for him, but boss waits a second. "find him," he instructs before leaving with most of the members.
once the door is closed, san lets out a deep sigh.
hongjoong walks to the table and turns around to lean against it. "anyone have any leads?" he asks.
"i'll send groups out," mingi says.
"i'll go to the borders. see if i can fish any information out of people," san says.
"good. go," hongjoong says to them. san, mingi, and the rest of their soldiers leave the room with mingi already giving instructions out. "you got anything?" hongjoong asks yunho.
"the others are checking on stuff," he mentions before approaching his friend. "they'll tell us as soon as possible."
"yea, i know," hongjoong replies.
days turn into months, and almost an entire year has passed, yet the guys hadn't received a single word from seonghwa. it's clear that he disappeared with y/n. all of them know that, but they have been worried since boss paid multiple visits to them. although, not even the boss's closest capos could find seonghwa.
life remained normal for the guys. they had to keep your presence unknown or else. seonghwa was mentioned a few times, but soon became an afterthought for the boss. however, seonghwa and y/n were never an afterthought to the guys.
after some time, the guys leave town to take some time for themselves. there are plenty of people to watch their territory, so a week or two wouldn't hurt so much.
"ooh, she's hot," mingi says as he holds his sunglasses up. he looks at a girl who is with two other girls, walking down a street.
"we just got here, and you're looking for a girl already?" jongho questions as he pops a button on his shirt open.
mingi sets his sunglasses on top of his head, "can't blame me for it. she is hot."
"is the beach house nearby?" yeosang asks as they stand on a street. the town is lively but safe enough for them to walk in the streets. there aren't too many cars around either.
"yea, we can walk there," hongjoong answers yeosang.
"you know, if you had let us bring electronics, then you could just use the gps like a normal person," wooyoung says to their leader.
"since when were you normal?" san says, taking a jab at wooyoung. wooyoung almost slaps san but decides against it while san laughs, earning a fist bump from yunho.
"it'll be nice taking a break from the world," yeosang says, throwing his arm over wooyoung's shoulders. "no one calling, no orders."
"hey, hyung. the beach house is yours, right?" jongho asks.
"huh? yea, bought it once we started making money," hongjoong answers. "this is where i'm retiring when we finally get out of everything."
"sounds like a dream," yunho replies. "need a roommate when we're older?" he asks.
"why would i want to live with you?" hongjoong replies as he starts walking, gesturing for the others to follow him.
all of them bicker as usual but reach the beach house within a few minutes.
"this place is nice!" mingi comments as he heads straight for the front door. "you've been hiding out on us, hongjoong."
"it's not hiding when you never asked," hongjoong replies and tosses the house keys to yunho, who catches them with ease. "once we unpack, let's check the town out. i haven't been here in awhile, so stuff is probably different."
"okay!"
"cool."
"this is a nice area," jongho comments while looking around the street. it's mostly beach houses lined up with plenty of space around them. a few people walk along the sidewalks, either heading to the beach or back into town.
"jongho, come on! we gotta check out the beach!" wooyoung yells at the youngest from the front door.
"we're gonna be here for like two weeks. we have plenty of time to go to the beach," jongho replies and starts walking towards the front door with his duffel bag in hand.
a light breeze goes through the sun room as you wake up from your nap. you open your eyes and look at the beach in the backyard. waves crashing against the shoreline. the sandcastle you had built yesterday no longer exists, but you aren't surprised.
you get up from the couch you had been napping on and go to one of the windows. you slide the window open and take a deep breath in and out, basking in the warmth.
"baby?"
you turn your head to see seonghwa walking in. he runs his hands through his hair to make it more presentable.
"let's go out. we need to check up on the store anyways," seonghwa says to you.
"sure," you reply with a smile, earning one back from him.
you close the window and grab your sunglasses off of a side table. you and seonghwa leave the house together and start walking into town.
"we should get some ice cream later," you suggest. seonghwa holds your hand as you two walk.
"that sounds good to me," he replies.
you two walk into town and greet people that you know. who would've know that you would've gotten better at talking to people after living on the island for this long.
"y/n, seonghwa, come by some time, alright?" an owner of a small restaurant says as you pass by their store.
"later this week. we promise," you reply. "tell your wife we said hello!"
"i will. take it easy now," they say before talking to some people coming into their restaurant.
seonghwa chuckles, "so i guess i know where date night is for this week, huh?" he says to you.
"it's been awhile since we've been there," you say to him and you turn into another street. "we should visit them more."
"we need to visit everyone more," he replies.
you walk a bit more and make it to the small beachside restaurant both of you own together. seonghwa walks in first with you following behind him. both of you say your greetings to the regulars and your workers as you pass them.
"i'll make us something to drink," you say to seonghwa and wash your hands at one of the sinks behind the bar.
"put extra ice," seonghwa says to you. you nod your head and start making drinks for you and him, talking with customers and your workers. seonghwa walks over to a table and sits down with some guys that frequent your store. "hey guys."
"man, it's been a second," one of them greets.
"did you guys just get back from another fishing trip?" seonghwa asks.
"yea, got a great looking tuna while we were out there. i'll bring some over to you," another guy says.
"thanks, man. that's nice of you," seonghwa says.
suddenly, you appear at the table and hand seonghwa a glass of iced tea.
"thanks, baby," he says to you. you reply with a hum and smile before returning to the bar top.
"you guys have adjusted real well, and this place is doing good too," one of the guys says. "you guys really deserve the best."
seonghwa smiles, "everyone on the island has been nothing but nice. it's because of you guys and everyone else that we have been doing well," he says to him. "cheers," he adds with a smile and clinks glasses with the fishermen.
"i already want to move here," yeosang says as all of them walk down a street together. because the time they arrived, it’s already getting close to night time, but the sun still hasn’t set yet. "i think i will move here."
"i'm glad i'm great at finding islands," hongjoong says while looking around. "one of you guys pick somewhere to go eat at, or we could pick up groceries and one of you cook at the house."
"this is our vacation. i'm not cooking," wooyoung replies.
"hey, how around over there?" yunho points to a restaurant. it's clear that there are plenty of customers inside, but it looks like a cozy place to eat at.
"if they have room for all of us," mingi speaks as they approach the store.
all of them walk into the restaurant, looking around for a table since it seems that they didn't need to wait for a server. they find a giant round booth to sit at and easily fit in.
there are already menus on the table. some of the guys grab menus while others look off of someone since there aren't enough. they start discussing what to order since everything seems appetizing.
after a few minutes, server walks to the table. "can i get you fellas started with something?" he asks them. "we got some great drinks, both alcoholic and nonalcoholic, and some new specials," he adds and grabs a smaller menu from another table with the specials.
san picks up the smaller menu, passing it to jongho after a second.
"got any recommendations?" yunho asks him.
"oh for sure. the "getaway" and "paradise island" are my favorite drinks. i like them without alcohol, but i can't tolerate anything higher than a hard seltzer," the server says before laughing.
"oh, this looks good," jongho comments.
the guys make their drink and food orders, and the server leaves to put the orders in.
"this is nice," san says while looking around the restaurant. the restaurant is full of regulars with a few tables of tourists if he were to guess. "kind of feels like the bar we like."
"the beach makes it better," wooyoung says while looking outside.
"hey, someone grab more glasses. we're running out," you announce while making a drink for a customer.
"already? i just grabbed more!" one of your workers says while carrying an empty ice bin.
"well i need more, so get a move on already," you say to him. both of you smile at each other as he goes into the kitchen to grab more drink glasses for the bar.
"need help with orders?" seonghwa asks, leaning against the end of the bar where workers can walk in and out.
"yea, sure," you reply and pour a drink into a martini glass. "here you go," you say to the customer as you push the drink towards her.
you rinse out some of the shaker cups and other tools while seonghwa gets started making drinks for some of the tables. you look over his shoulder and see the table he is working on.
"do these," seonghwa says, pointing at the written ticket.
you nod, "okay."
both of you finish making the drinks and put them on a tray for one of the servers to take to the table.
"should we head out soon?" you ask seonghwa while cleaning up behind the bar. "they'll be fine without us. if anything, we're probably in the way."
"it's because you are," one of your bartenders says to you. you bump your hip next to hers while she just laughs in response.
"we need to figure out dinner," seonghwa says. "want to just eat here tonight?" he suggests.
"yea, that's fine," you say to him. "let me finish cleaning."
"just go already," the bartender says to you. "i got it, y/n. you pay me to do this," she reminds you.
"it’s fine! it’s not a lot," you reply with a laugh.
"i'm going to go around the tables," seonghwa says to both of you.
"you're taking your workers's jobs again," your bartender says as she grabs a bottle of liquor.
seonghwa laughs as he goes around the tables. a few hours have passed since you two came to the store. both of you didn't mean to stay this long, but both of you are happy to be at the restaurant.
"nice to see you," seonghwa says as he passes by a table of locals. "i'm going to come by tomorrow to buy flowers for y/n. get some prepared for me."
"you got it," the florist replies before returning their attention to their friends.
seonghwa talks to more locals, getting stopped one after another.
the atmosphere is so lively, so precious, so different from what life used to be like for you and seonghwa. it's a life where you're both truly happy.
"today was a good day, don't you think?" you ask seonghwa.
he nods as he finishes off his fries from the burger he just ate. "yea, today was good." he takes the empty plates and reaches over to throw them into a dishwashing bin that is near the table.
you look around the restaurant, waving at the few locals that get your attention. being here makes you happy. the restaurant has shown how life is precious, and you're grateful to be where you are now.
whenever you're at the restaurant, you tend to give free drinks out, but only to the people who seem like tourists. its not often that people visit the island, but you hope the simple gesture makes their visit to the island even more special.
as you scan through the patrons, your eyes stop on one of the booths. you almost start tearing up but smile at the sight.
"baby, what is it?" seonghwa asks you.
you gesture for him to look, "look for yourself."
seonghwa looks over and ends up on the same booth that you're looking at. you watch his expression change a few times before ending on a soft smile.
then, he looks at you, "freebies?"
you laugh, "you read my mind."
"we're getting more food?" hongjoong questions.
"i'll split the bill. i'm still hungry," san says while looking at a menu.
"i want another drink," mingi says. "was yours good?" he asks yunho.
"yea. it was really good," yunho replies.
"excuse me," a server comes up to the table with drinks on a tray. "these drinks are on the house. no alcohol in them, but they're pretty darn good," she says and places the drinks on the table.
"for us?" jongho asks in question.
"oh perfect timing," mingi cheers in excitement and grabs a glass.
"from our owners. we appreciate you guys coming in today," she says before walking away with the tray against her torso so it isn't in the way of others.
"this is so nice of them," jongho says and passes a glass to san.
"it really is," hongjoong says and takes a sip of the drink. "oh wow," he comments.
"okay, i seriously am moving here. i don't care anymore," yeosang says and puts his drink glass on the table.
hongjoong looks around the restaurant. there's a bunch of people still. all of the patrons enjoying their conversations and meals. he takes another sip of this drink, finding the taste similar to something he's had in the past. he continues to look around the restaurant but stops after a second.
"i should've fucking known."
he gets out of the booth with stares from the rest of the guys. hongjoong approaches a table where two familiar faces sit at.
"i fucking knew it," hongjoong says to the two. "an iced peach tea with strawberry syrup and blueberries."
"it's been awhile," you say to him, taking a sip of the same drink that was just mentioned.
seonghwa stands up, holding his hand out to hongjoong. hongjoong doesn't take it but instead hugs him, and seonghwa hugs him back.
"welcome home," seonghwa says to him.
moments later, an onslaught appears and both you and seonghwa are engulfed in hugs. "hyung! y/n!" you can't hide the smile on your face as you hug your family for the first time in a long time. it's like everything is back to normal.
"welcome home," you say to each of them after every hug.
"where did you guys go afterwards?" yeosang asks. all of you sit at the booth together.
"i got a car from those kids hanging out in the construction lot. we drove for hours out of town," seonghwa starts, "we didn't know where to go, but i remembered about this place," he says, indicating the island. "hongjoong wouldn't stop talking about it after all," he adds, earning a chuckle from the leader.
seonghwa has his arm wrapped around you while you lean against him. "we were pretty lost when we came here though," you say to them. "took a second, but we found a new life. it's kind of old fashioned, but honestly, it's great."
"boss was serious about looking for you, but he stopped asking about you," yunho says to seonghwa. "we kept everything under wraps, but he stopped caring. the territory expanded a lot since you guys left."
seonghwa nods, "well, boss has his ways," he says. "i had to leave. we had to leave," he emphasizes.
"we get it," mingi says to him.
"yea, we'd do the same," wooyoung speaks up. "we're just glad to see you guys again."
"seonghwa said that there would be a chance we would see you guys again. we just didn't know it'd be sooner than later," you say to them. "we're really happy here. we have nothing to worry about anymore."
"how'd you get off the grid?" jongho asks, knowing he had tracked everything he could months before.
"i had cash saved up. dumped everything in my name and bought new ones. you know how it goes," seonghwa answers.
"last i heard, one of you got rid of all my stuff when i was kicked out," you say to them.
"...sorry."
you chuckle at san's response, "it's okay. i have what i need now." you look up at seonghwa and he looks at you with a smile.
"come on, let's get out of here. fun hasn't even started yet," seonghwa announces and gets out of the booth.
"it's late," hongjoong says to him.
"don't act like an old man now," seonghwa replies with a grin.
"let's go!" yunho cheers.
all of you leave the restaurant and go into town to show the guys around. there are plenty of places still open and plenty of people having fun still.
you and seonghwa walk hand in hand.
"love you," you say to him.
"love you, baby."
129 notes · View notes
silver-hwaberry · 3 months ago
Text
TWENTY-ONE: shooting stars
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Warnings: anxiety, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, safe word set but not used, spanking, swearing
Word count: 11.3K
Summary: KCON day has arrived and Luna is there for a member who is struggling. While another member has planned a night for just the two of them under the stars in LA.
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From the moment Jongho woke up in his hotel room in LA, he felt off. Something wasn’t right and he couldn’t figure out what. He presumed at first it was maybe the long flight the day before with a full day at kcon ahead of them. So he did his usual routine for when they were away for work of getting up early and going down to the gym. To his surprise, Luna and Yeosang were in there. Luna was running on the treadmill while Yeosang was doing weight lifting.
"Hey Jongho!" Luna greets with a smile, increasing her pace on the treadmill.
Jongho returns the smile, feeling a bit more awake now that he has seen her. "Morning, Luna." he replies, making his way over to the weights area where Yeosang was focused on his reps.
As Jongho began his workout, he found himself stealing glances at Luna's intense treadmill session. The rhythmic thumping of her strides against the machine echoed in the gym, providing a steady beat to their morning routine. After a while, Luna slows down, her breaths becoming more laboured.
"Oh my god, I am so done now!" she exclaimed, stopping the treadmill and wiping sweat from her face.
“You did well.” Yeosang replies placing the weights down
“That is a lie, but I’ll take the compliment anyway.” she laughs walking over to him
Jongho watches as she wipes some sweat from Yeosangs forehead with her towel before pulling him in for a kiss. As Yeosang wraps his arms around her waist and kisses her back Jongho quickly averts his gaze, feeling like he is intruding on a private moment between them. When they break apart Yeosang goes over to the water machine to refill his water bottle. Luna notices Jonghos quiet demeanor.
"Hey, Jongho, you're awfully quiet over there. Everything okay?" Luna asks softly
Jongho forces a smile. "Yeah, I'm good." he replies nonchalantly, not wanting to burden her with his concerns as he puts the weight he was lifting onto the floor and stretches his arms
"Jjong, you know you can talk to me, right? I’m here for you, if you need anything." she reassures him, her voice soft and comforting.
Feeling her genuine care and support for him, he considers telling her but he couldn’t pinpoint himself exactly why he was feeling this way. “Honestly, I’m just tired. From the flight yesterday and having a full day ahead of us at kcon.” he says, “I’ll be fine once I’ve had my workout and breakfast.” he adds
Luna looks at him, not quite believing him but not wanting to push him either. She reaches over and holds onto one of his hands. “Okay.” she nods, “Remember that I am always here though.”
Feeling the warmth of her hand in his, Jongho laces their fingers and gives her a small smile. “I know, thank you sweetheart.”
Yeosang comes back over to them, gulping down the cool water. He notices their entwined hands and smiles to himself at seeing Jongho allowing himself to be open with someone.
“Anyway, I better go get my stinky ass in the shower. I’ll see you guys later on when we get picked up.” she says giving Jonghos hand a tiny squeeze before kissing Yeosangs cheek and leaving
Jongho and Yeosang continued their workout in a comfortable silence, each lost in their own thoughts. The gym gradually filled up as the morning wore on, the quiet atmosphere replaced by the hum of activity. As they finished their workout, Jongho felt his energy levels have increased but the unease was still there.
“I wasn’t expecting to see you two so early.” Jongho says, “Thought I’d have the gym to myself at such an early hour.”
“Wasn’t planning to come down this early to be honest but I couldn’t really sleep so got up and I found Luna waiting for the elevator.” Yeosang replies, “Wasn’t expecting to see her either.”
“How was she this morning?” Jongho asks
As they all gathered in Hongjoong's room for dinner the night before, not a single one of them spoke of the panic attack that had occurred on the plane. It was an agreement the 8 of them made before Yunho arrived with her, that they would only speak about it if she brought it up first. While mostly everyone was asleep on the plane Luna had spoken to Seonghwa privately, telling him how embarrassed she was by what happened and although he had reassured her she had nothing to be embarrassed about, she said she still felt self-conscious about it. So not wanting to make her uncomfortable, they made the decision not to talk about it.
“Her usual happy and bright self. I think she got a good nights sleep.” Yeosang answers as Jongho nods. Little did they know she didn’t get as much sleep as the others did and neither did Yunho who’s room she’d spent the night in after the dinner.
After Jongho and Yeosang cleaned up they went back to their rooms but the feeling inside of Jongho was still there. He had hoped the workout would have settled it so he continued with his morning routine of having a shower and ordering breakfast to his room before going to the conference room that had been set up for hair and make up.
“Where is Luna?” San asks, scanning the room as he enters
“She’ll be coming down soon.” Hongjoong answers as Chaeyoung runs a brush through his hair
“I don’t get why Luna is always around!” Chaeyoung blurts out.
“Luna is our translator.” Hongjoong answers in a monotone voice, “She’ll always be with us, that’s her job.”
He had picked up on the looks Chaeyoung would give Luna when she was around and how Luna kept her distance from her. It didn’t surprise him though as most of the staff did the exact same because of Chaeyoungs attitude and her little mean girl gang. Hongjoong knew how outspoken Luna was too and had assumed she was keeping herself away so as not to say anything. Either way Hongjoong didn’t like Chaeyoung but he tolerated her because she excelled at her job and in order to keep her away from the other guys after the incident with Yunho, he volunteered himself.
“I get that, Joongie,” she sighs. “But does she really need to be in hair and makeup? Or hanging around when she isn’t needed?”
“Yes, because we’re about to attend a predominantly English-speaking event in 30 minutes. We need to be prepared,” he replies curtly. “And it’s Hongjoong to you,” he adds, feeling a hot sensation of irritation at hearing her use the nickname that made his heart flutter and a reason to smile when Luna said it. From Chaeyoung’s mouth, it made his stomach turn. He felt it to be incredibly unprofessional as well when they were coworkers only, they had no form of friendship outside of her styling his hair.
“I..I’m sorry…I’m..” she stammers, her eyes wide as she looks at him through the mirror
“Lets just focus on work.” he interrupts
She nods and continues styling his hair. At that moment, Luna enters the room and the others greet her politely. Hongjoong notices the eye roll from Chaeyoung through the mirror in front of him.
As Luna takes her seat in the corner of the room, Wooyoung glances over at her and asks, "How are you feeling today, Luna? Did you sleep well?"
Luna smiles warmly and replies, "I'm feeling great, thank you. I slept…. good.” she glances over at Yunho briefly who gives her a discreet smile in return,
“That’s good!” Wooyoung smiles, “Ready for a busy day ahead?”
“I am excited for the event and fully ready to help out however I can."
Hongjoong nods in approval before turning his attention back to Chaeyoung. Sensing a tense atmosphere with Chaeyoung staring at Luna through the mirror, he decides to break the silence by saying, "Let's make sure everything is perfect today. We need to show our best selves at this event."
Chaeyoung, still feeling uneasy after her slip-up earlier, chimes in nervously, "Yeah, of course. I'll make sure everything is ready for you guys. Sorry again for earlier."
“Lets just focus on our individual jobs and not what other people are doing.” he states firmly as she can only nod in response.
Nearly everyone is ready to leave now. The stylists with the outfits had already gone ahead to set up the changing room at the venue. Most of the hair and makeup was done, and cars were arranged for transport. Luna looks around the room, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves bubble inside her. This was her first English-speaking event with the team—a chance to prove herself to both the company and the guys as the right choice for the job.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
So far the day has gone well, they have done a couple of interviews and handled the English perfectly. Luna hadn’t needed to help translate anything but was there to support them if they needed, and her constant presence nearby them bolstered their confidence.
As the concert's start near, Ateez prepare to open the show. Everyone is gathered in their designated changing area, stylists putting finishing touches to outfits, ensuring micpacks are secure and hidden, etc. Jongho sits in a corner, hands trembling as he mentally rehearses the choreography for the kcon signature song. Luna notices his tense demeanour and shaking hands. She has never seen him this nervous before and felt a pang of worry. Approaching him, she glances at the staff finalising outfits and hair for the others, making sure no one was watching her. "Hey, it's going to be okay," she says soothingly.
Jongho looks up at her with wide eyes, his bottom lip trembling. "But what if I mess up? What if I let everyone down?" he whispers, his voice cracking.
Luna takes another look around, she knows they aren’t due on stage for another 20 minutes. “Come with me.” she says
Jongho rises from his seat, following her into a cramped room attached to their preparation area. The space is cluttered with racks of outfits and boxes piled high, but they are alone. She closes the door behind them, shutting out the chatter and bustle of the main room. Turning to face him, she sees his clammy cheeks and her heart clenches. Stepping closer, she takes his hands in hers, offering a gesture of comfort in front of him.
“Talk to me.” she urges softly. Jongho remains silent, his gaze fixed on the ground, “It is just us two here. You can tell me anything you want to and I promise, it won’t leave this room.”
Jongho's eyes flicker nervously as they meet hers. Even though she stands a couple of feet away, he can feel the warmth radiating from her and it instantly calms his racing heart. He hates being vulnerable in front of others, always afraid of judgement or rejection. Throughout his life, he has never known how to respond when people tried to help him, often pushing them away instead.
But standing here with Luna, her small soft hands in his, he feels something shift inside him. As he looks down at her, her full attention solely on him, he feels his walls begin to crumble. It scares him and enthrals him all at once. He takes a deep breath, his bottom lip trembling as he finally voices his fears. "But what if I mess up? What if I let everyone down?" he whispers.
Luna smiles softly, one of her hands leaves his and touches his face, her fingers gently touch his cheek. "You won't mess up, and you will never let anyone down."
Jongho's chest rises and falls in rapid breaths as he struggles to control his emotions. Luna knows that words alone wouldn't be enough to ease his anxiety, so without hesitation, she did what she always does when someone she cares about needs comfort – enveloping him in a warm embrace.
She understands the risk of crossing this physical boundary with him, but she can’t see him this way and not try to provide him with a bit of solace. Her arms wrap around his sturdy frame, pulling him close to her, careful not to disturb his hair or make up. She could feel his tense muscles slowly relaxing against her, his head finding a comfortable spot on her shoulder. They stay like this for a few moments, breathing in sync. Jongho's self-doubt and nerves fade away as he holds onto her tightly.
"Thank you," Jongho mumbles into her shoulder, his voice muffled.
Luna pulls away slightly but still keeping him in her arms, looking at him with a soft smile. "Anytime, Jongho."
"I woke up this morning feeling off, and it only got worse as the day went on," he explains.
"I know that feeling," she responds, gazing into his eyes.
"Learning the choreography for the kcon song in just 6 hours and then rehearsing for the tour on top of that...it's all blending together," he continues. "I'm struggling with the new dances for the tour. Yunho is working hard to teach us, Mingi and Wooyoung has been helping him. I've been watching BBT's videos over and over again in my room at night." He sighs. "Normally, I don't have trouble with choreo but this time it's really getting to me and I don't understand why."
Luna nods and lets him express his emotions, hoping it will ease his stress. She understands the power of verbalising worries.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t be unloading to you like this.” he says looking away
"It's perfectly fine and you definitely should be," she replies, gently turning his gaze back to her with her hand on his cheek. "If talking helps you, always come to me. I'm a good listener." Her hand moves to his shoulder as she looks into his eyes. "Jjong, you are amazing. You have more talent in your pinkie finger than most of us have in our entire bodies. I know you'll get on that stage and blow everyone away, like you always do!"
Jongho looks down at her as their surroundings fade away, leaving just the two of them in the world. He smiles, enfolding her in another embrace, relief washing over him at her uplifting words of encouragement and support, and also that he has conquered the barrier of hugging Luna. Though she initiated it, and he's thankful she did.
As they gaze into each other's eyes, the world falls silent and time seems to stop. Jongho leans in, gently brushing his lips against Luna's cheek. When she responds favourably, nestling closer to his touch, he continues trailing soft kisses along her face until he reaches her lips. Looking into her eyes once more, he nods almost subtly as if seeking permission to finally do what they've both been longing for. She smiles her consent. Just as they are about to share their first kiss, the sound of the door opening shatters the moment.
“Oh, I’m sorry!” Sans voice says causing Jongho to pull his head back but he keeps a hold of her in his arms, “I didn’t mean to.. interrupt you both.”
“It is fine.” Jongho says looking over at him, Luna feels his hand subtly rub her back and it feels nice, “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, um...” Sans stumbles over his words, clearly flustered by catching them in a private moment. “Hongjoong was looking for you. We need to head to the stage area now.” He nervously scratches the back of his neck. “Sorry again!” With that, he closes the door and leaves them alone once more.
Jongho's gaze stays on the door through which San has just left, a hint of frustration crossing his features. "We never seem to get a moment alone," he murmurs, more to himself than to Luna.
Luna tightens her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. "We both know that always going to be hectic and chaotic, there will always be someone floating nearby but we'll find our moments together, where it is just us two." she reassures him.
Jongho turns to Luna, placing his forehead against hers. "I'm holding onto that hope," he whispers, his gaze softening as he takes comfort in her presence. “I really want to kiss you... but not like this. Not in a hurry and not when I have to leave for the stage without being able to see you again until much later tonight because we'll both be busy working all day. I'm not foolish enough to expect the perfect first kiss, but I also don't want it to be rushed."
"Jongho," Luna whispers, "our cafe date is just a couple of days away. I can't wait to have you all to myself, to share our first kiss and whenever that may be, it will be perfect because it will be ours." She smiles at him tenderly, her eyes conveying all the affection she feels for him. “Now lets get back before I get into trouble from Hongjoong for stealing you away!”
As Jongho wraps his arms around her waist, he feels a surge of happiness wash over him. “Our first kiss will be magical and perfect, just like you.” He whispers, pressing a tender kiss against her forehead. A rosy blush spreads across Luna's cheeks at Jongho's gesture, a wave of warmth coursing through her body. “And I’ll handle Hongjoong, I won’t let him scold my little sweetheart!” he adds
She gazes up at him with a sheepish smile, completely caught up in the moment and loving every second of it, she returns the gesture by kissing the back of his hand so as not to ruin his make up. As they lock eyes, their faces flush with an innocent charm reminiscent of besotted teenagers. Jongho smiles widely at her, his signature gummy smile on show and crescent moon eyes.
“Lets go.” she says finally pulling apart from him
She follows him over to the door, seeing that Jongho is carrying himself more confidently and he has gone from being closed off to open and she finds herself smiling as they walk back into the changing area.
“Luna, there you are!” Wooyoung calls out to her in English, walking towards her as Jongho heads over to a stylist to put on his jacket.
Luna is surprised by Wooyoung's sudden use of English, but also feels proud of him. “Hey, what's going on?” she responds in English.
“We want you to watch us from the side of the stage instead of staying back here.” he says quietly, switching back to Korean
“Are you sure? I don’t want to get in the way or distract anyone.” she asks
“Of course we’re sure. We love having you there when we perform and this is a special show for us. We’re opening the show, performing the signature song and it is also your home country.” he replies, “Plus, you know we always want you by our sides.”
Luna feels her heart swell with emotion as she looks at Wooyoung and the rest of the group making their final preparations.
“So will you come?” Wooyoung asks, his voice soft
"Do you even have to ask? I'll always be there for you guys," Luna responds with a light laugh. "I wouldn't miss it for anything."
“Let’s go!” Myeonjin shouts over the noise, signalling that it’s time to head out.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Their performance was an energetic and seamless display of talent and passion. The audience, already brimming with anticipation, were immediately swept up in the music as soon as the group stepped onto the stage. This only fuelled the band members to give their all, pouring their hearts into each note and dance move. Luna watched from the sidelines, her eyes sparkling with joy as her boyfriends performed. Unable to contain her excitement, she danced and sang along with the music, joined by Hyunshik. The two of them danced freely at the edge of the stage, not caring who could see them as they enjoyed each other's company.
During "Hala Hala," Hongjoong spotted them, his heart swelling at Luna's carefree happiness with her friend. Between songs, Luna watched intently, pride surging as they flawlessly delivered their rehearsed English speeches amidst their hectic schedules. As the music resumed, she and Hyunshik resumed their playful dancing.
After the final note faded, they hurried back to the waiting area to prepare for the meet-and-greet session and other events. Luna stood ready to assist with translations. Though their stage time was over until the grand finale, their day was far from done. The air buzzed with anticipation for what lay ahead.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
After the show concluded, everyone retreated to the hotel. The guys had already arranged to do a live on YouTube while they ate dinner so Luna went back to her room where she immediately got changed into a pair of black sweatpants, a loose fitting cropped t-shirt and an oversized knitted cardigan, ordered her own dinner while she watched the live. Knowing most of the group would either go out to enjoy their rare free time in LA or head straight to bed, she prepared for a quiet night alone.
Once the live session ended and her food trays were placed outside her door, Luna settled on top of her bed with a book she had planned to read on the plane but hadn’t touched. She had spent that flight sleeping and watching a movie with Yeosang, their hands secretly intertwined under blankets.
Ten minutes later, her phone buzzed, pulling her from the pages. Seeing Hongjoong’s name on the screen made her heart flutter.
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Luna feels a little bubble of excitement in her tummy as she puts her phone on the bed and jumps off it, quickly makes her way over to the bathroom to freshen up for him. Apart from their lunch in his studio a few weeks ago this was the first time he’s asked to do something with her that wasn’t at the company building. With the long hours Hongjoong works in his studio, they rarely see one another in the apartment either so opportunities to be alone have been slim to zero.
As she brushes her hair she hears a small knock at her hotel room door, she places the brush back on the dressing table and opens the door to see Hongjoong smiling at her. His heart flutters as he sees her; despite being together all day at work, he yearned for time alone with her in private. Away from work.
“Hey Joongie!” she smiles happily
“Are you ready?” he asks
“I just need to grab my phone and put my sneakers on.” she says, “Come in.”
He follows her inside, taking in her surroundings. Her suitcase lays open in a corner, clothes jumbled inside—clearly not planning to unpack. Her work laptop sat on the desk, screen dark. Her usual Kuromi comfort blanket draped over the bed caught his eye, along with an open book beside it.
"Nice book," he remarks, picking it up gently without losing her place. "Have you had much chance to read it?" He glanced at the cover: The Letters of Vincent Van Gogh.
Luna chuckles, finishing tying her shoelaces. "Only just started it. I got it for the plane ride but ended up sleeping most of it. Maybe I'll get to it on the flight home."
“Do you like to read?” he asks
“Oh yeah! My mom is an English teacher, so I grew up with books. If I wasn’t studying languages, I had my nose stuck in a book.” she answers
“And Van Gogh I see, you like reading art books?” he asks carefully putting it back in the exact position he found it
“I love all books! From trashy romance novels to art history.” she laughs standing up from the seat in the corner and fixing the waistband of her sweats. “In my old job at the hotel I didn’t have any time for reading but now I do, which I absolutely love!” she picks up her phone and slides it into her pocket "Shall we go?" she asks, flashing a bright smile.
"Of course," he says returning her smile, holding the door open for her. They leave the room together and instead of heading to the elevator lobby on their floor Hongjoong walks in the opposite direction with Luna following rather clueless.
"So, where are we headed?" Luna asks curiously as they arrive at the end of the corridor at a smaller looking elevator door.
He looks down at her with a playful glint in his eyes. "It's a surprise," he teases as he presses the button.
Entering the elevator Hongjoong presses the button for the top floor before putting a 4 digit code into the keypad. Luna looks at him with a look of intrigue in her eyes. “Well now I am even more curious!” she giggles
With a charming smile, Hongjoong puts an arm around her shoulders and pulls her towards him. Luna smiles as she cuddles into the side of his body, her head resting on his shoulder. As the lift carries them upwards to their destination, he holds her close, savouring the feeling of her warmth against the side of his body.
The doors open to reveal a breathtaking sight. As they step out onto the rooftop garden, Luna's breath catches in her throat. The sky is dark, but the stars were shining brightly, twinkling like diamonds in the sky. Her eyes widen, taking in the breathtaking sight before her. There are sun loungers dotted around the space. In the corner of the rooftop stands a cute gazebo adorned with beautiful flowers and delicate fairy lights spiralled around the flowers and pillars. There is also strings of lights hanging around the rooftop too and it makes her heart swell at how romantic it all feels. She wasn’t expecting this from him at all.
Hongjoong keeps his eyes fixed on her, a smile creeping onto his face as he looks at her looking around in complete awe. Her big brown eyes sparking under the fairy lights surrounding them.
“Joongie…” she gasps, “This is so beautiful.”
"I thought you might like it," Hongjoong says, smiling at her.
Luna turns to him, a questioning look in her eyes. "But why did you bring me up here?"
Gently taking her hand, Hongjoong pulls her close and wraps his arms around her waist as she snakes hers around his shoulders. "I wanted time alone, just us, away from work and the company. The hotel room didn't seem special enough and I didn’t want to take you out anywhere with other people around. But I remembered how incredible the rooftop was on our last trip here, with complete privacy and I knew it was perfect for us." He presses his lips to hers in a tender kiss. Luna's heart flutters at his gesture, and she couldn't help but feel a warmth in her chest.
As they sit on one of the double sun loungers, Hongjoong pulls a small bag that was hidden underneath it. He opens it to reveal some snacks and drinks. “Strawberries!” she giggles as she hands the container to her
“Not just strawberries.” he grins putting his hand back into the bag.
Luna's eyes widen in surprise as Hongjoong shows her the tub of cream. "Oh, you really went all out, didn't you?" she chuckles, playfully nudging him as he pulls out more snacks and drinks for them both.
"I wanted to make sure we have all the essentials for a perfect evening under the stars," he replies smoothly, scooping out a dollop of cream onto a strawberry and offering it to Luna.
She accepts the strawberry, her lips curling into a smile as she takes a bite. "Mmm, delicious," she remarks, enjoying the sweet combination of fruit and cream.
Beneath the glittering night sky, they share an impromptu picnic on the rooftop. All stress and responsibilities fade away as they sink into complete relaxation, alone together. Conversation flows effortlessly, touching on anything and everything, relishing this rare opportunity to connect without distractions.
"This is amazing, Joongie," she murmurs, looking at him with gratitude and affection in her eyes. "Thank you for this special evening."
Hongjoong's expression softens as he meets her gaze. "I'm just happy to see you smile," he says sincerely, reaching over to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “Come here.”
He gathers their empty food containers and drink bottles, placing them back into the bag before pulling her to sit between his legs, her back against his chest. As she settles happily into his embrace, he pulls out a blanket, covering them both.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been around much for you.” he whispers in her ear
“You don’t need to apologise.” she replies, “I know you are busy with work.”
“But still, I should be making more time for you.” he adds
“Do I wish you were home more often? Of course I do. Do I hate when you sleep at the studio instead of in your own bed? You bet I do! But it’s because I want to see you taking an actual break and resting. Of course, I want to see you too, but I'm more concerned about your health and well-being.” Luna says
Hongjoong swallows hard, her concern piercing through his defenses. He reflects on the countless hours spent in the studio, unaware of how much she worried for him while he was locked away.
Tightening his hold around her, he presses a kiss to the top of her head. "I promise to make more time for us, to create moments like this—just you and me, no distractions or worries. And I promise to come home more too."
Luna turns her head to look up at Hongjoong. "I appreciate your promise, Joongie," she says softly, her voice filled with warmth. "But, I also understand your passion for music and how hard you work for it. I just want us all to find that balance where we can support each other fully."
Feeling the sincerity in her words, Hongjoong tightens his arms around her, a soft chuckle escaping him. "I'm grateful to have you by my side, Luna. Your understanding and support means everything to me, to all of us."
As they lay there under the vast expanse of stars, Luna felt blessed. She had found acceptance in the most unexpected place. These 8 men opening her eyes to a new world where intimacy wasn't confined to one person but could take many forms and still be beautiful.
Hongjoong looks down at her, his arms around her waist pulling her closer to him. Luna turns her head slightly and looks back at him. “Are you okay, my love?” he asks softly
Luna's eyes shimmer with emotion as she meets Hongjoong's gaze, feeling a rush of warmth at his term of endearment. "I'm more than okay, Joongie," she nods, reaching her hand back to touch his cheek, "I'm happy... truly happy." she adds leaning her head back against his chest.
“I’m glad.” he replies softly. He tenderly presses his lips against her hand, savouring the intimate moment they are experiencing. It's a rare luxury for them, with their busy schedules and the pressure to maintain a professional demeanour in public. Their physical displays of affection have been limited to quick stolen kisses and brief hugs. But now, he caresses her stomach with gentle strokes while she traces her fingers along his jawline, both basking in the warmth and comfort of one another. Luna leans back into him with a soft happy sigh.
Suddenly, a shooting star streaks across the night sky, drawing gasps from both Luna and Hongjoong. “oh my god, did you just see that?!” Luna asks excitedly looking back at him with big sparkling eyes
“I did!” Hongjoong grins, kissing her cheek before putting his lips to her ear whispering, “Make a wish, my love.”
A smile crosses her face as she closes her eyes tight and make a silent wish deep in her heart. When she opens them again she sees him looking at her with a look of adoration in his face.
“What did you wish for?” he asks softly
“I can’t tell you that,” she replies turning her head to kiss him, “It won’t come true if I do.”
Hongjoong chuckles softly, pulling her closer and placing a kiss on the side of her head. “That’s true.” he says resting his head against hers as they look back up the star strewn across night sky. Hongjoong knew he’d picked the right night to do this with Luna. The sky was clear, the air wasn’t too cold, it was a tranquil night for just the two of them after a hectic couple of weeks for them both.
“Joongie?” Luna’s voice is barely a whisper.
“Yes, my love?” he responds, his tone tender.
Luna’s stomach churns with nerves as she finally voices her fear. “Why... why do you guys want me? You’re idols; you could have anyone. Why me? I’m just... nobody.” Her voice tightens, revealing her anxiety.
Hongjoong can see the insecurity in her eyes and he moves to turn her around, sitting her on his lap so they are facing each other. He cups her cheek gently with his hand causing her to look into his eyes. "Luna," he begins, "you’re far from 'nobody' to us. From the moment we met you, we all felt a strong connection to you. There was something about you that we couldn't quite put into words, or even figure out fully what was drawing us all to you. As we got to know you, it became clear to all of us why." He leans in closer, his warm breath brushing against her skin as he continues, "You bring a light into our lives that we didn't even know was missing. Your kindness, strength, uniqueness - your entire being captivates us in ways we never thought possible. We don't want just anyone, Luna. We want you." His words hang in the air between them, heavy with sincerity and a depth of emotion that leaves Luna speechless.
Luna's big, doe-like brown eyes widen in surprise and a flurry of emotions. She searches his deep, warm gaze for any hint of deceit or insincerity, but all she finds is honesty and adoration reflecting back at her. The way his gaze holds hers makes her heart skip a beat, like they are the only two people in the world at that moment. A soft smile tugs at the corners of her mouth as she leans in placing a soft kiss on his lips.
“How are you doing with our situation?” he asks, looking into her eyes seriously
“It’s... good,” she smiles, her hands sliding up his arms to circle his shoulders. “It was strange at first. I second-guessed everything—what I said, did, even wore—wondering what you all thought about me being in a relationship with eight men.” She pauses, recalling moments of doubt and uncertainty.
Hongjoong reads the conflict on her face and gently squeezes her hips reassuringly.
“But then,” she continues “I realised that you guys were just as nervous and unsure about things as I was and it made me relax.” she smiles softly at him, her fingers play with the ends of his fluffy hair
“We definitely were!” he chuckles, his hands holding onto her hips, “A poly relationship is hard to navigate and I understand that it is harder for you than for us. 8 of us and 1 of you, many of us vying for your attention and wanting to spend time with you plus you need your alone time too.”
Luna nods in understanding, feeling gratitude wash over her. She leans closer, resting her head against his chest and taking a deep breath that brings calm.
“You’ve all been so patient with me,” she whispers softly, her voice muffled against his shirt. “And you look after me as well. More than you should have to with your own busy lives.”
Hongjoong wraps his arms around her tightly. “Of course, Luna. We care deeply about your comfort and happiness.”
She looks up at him, her eyes glistening with emotion. “I never imagined I could feel this way about multiple people at once.”
Hongjoong smiles tenderly, brushing a stray strand of hair away from her face. “We’re all learning and growing together, Luna. Your presence in our lives has brought us closer and made us stronger as a unit too.” He leans forward and kisses her.
Luna gasps as Hongjoong’s lips meet hers in a passionate kiss, his hands gripping her hips firmly. Their bodies press together; she feels his arousal growing between them. Her breath hitches as she moans into the kiss, tasting the lingering sweetness of earlier snacks on his lips. His fingers trace slow circles on the bare skin of her lower back beneath her loose cardigan, igniting a fire within them both that has nothing to do with the balmy weather outside—a spark of heat that sends shivers up her spine.
She responds to his gentle ministrations by delicately tracing the contours of his face with her fingertips, each stroke igniting their shared skin with an intense need. Her fingers dance lightly over the faint hint of stubble on his chin, drawing a deep, rumbling groan from some hidden part of him that vibrates pleasantly against her own heated flesh.
Luna’s breath hitches as Hongjoong trails kisses down her neck, following the curve with a slow, languid pace. "Joongie," she moans lightly, dropping her head back as he pulls her hips over his, a spark of pleasure hitting her core as it rubs against his hard on. She clings onto him tighter, her nails digging into his back through the fabric of his shirt.
"God, Luna," he breaths against the hollow of her throat, "you're so fucking sexy on top of me like this." Suddenly he grabs her hips and rolls them over so she is lying on the sun-lounger and positions himself above her. His eyes darken with desire as he looks at her sprawled beneath him. He groans, taking her lips in a passionate and deep kiss, tongues dancing as their bodies move against each other. His hands roam her body, feeling every curve and soft places, before running down to cup her ass, pulling her closer to his hardening cock. She moans into the kiss, feeling the heat between them growing stronger as her fingers tug at his hair. Hongjoong can feel himself getting lost in the moment, his hand inching closer and closer to sliding into her sweatpants.
"Fuck, Luna..." he rasps against her mouth, "We...we should stop."
Luna quickly untangles her legs from around his waist and tries to move away. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to…”
"No, no," he pants, dragging her back against him, "I only meant we should retreat somewhere more private if we want to continue this." His hand glides down her taut stomach, toying with the waistband of her sweats. "It's a bit...exposed out here, even if we're alone." He bites his lower lip, voice husky with want.
“Oh shit!” she covers her mouth giggling, “I wasn’t even thinking straight.” Her eyes lock with his again. “So… your room or mine?”
“Mine is closer.” he replies briskly
“Someones a bit impatient.” she teases with a smirk
"Can you blame me?" With a smooth motion, he pushes himself off of her and helps her to stand. Without hesitation, he pulls her towards the elevator door and they move quickly, almost running. Time seems to slow down as they wait for the doors to open, every second feeling like an eternity. But once inside, Hongjoong becomes bold, pressing her firmly against the wall as his hands eagerly explore her body. They are caught up in a frenzy of desire, their lips crashing together in a hungry kiss as the doors close behind them, sealing them in their own private world. Lost in throes of desire, their bodies melt together, hands grasping and caressing.
"Joongie..." Luna mutters, placing her hands on his chest. He stills immediately.
"Am I moving too fast?" he asks, searching her eyes for any signs of hesitation.
"Oh no, not at all!" she giggles. "Just, the cameras..." She nods towards the device in the corner.
"Don't worry, this is a private elevator and our security controls the cameras here tonight, in here and on our floor." he assures her. "No one will ever see the footage. We have complete privacy."
"You really have thought of everything," she marvels.
"I wanted us to be able to be carefree tonight, like a regular couple" he says with a smile. “And no, I didn’t plan for this to be on the cards tonight before you say.” he adds kissing her softly
“I wasn’t going to.” she chuckles kissing him back, “But it is pretty damn perfect.” she adds with a playful grin causing him to blush lightly
The elevator doors glide open with a soft hiss, revealing their floor. Hongjoong reaches for Luna's hand, lacing their fingers as he quickly leads her down the plush carpeted hallway to his room. Giggling, she hurries to match his eager pace until they reach the door. Fingers fumbling in haste, he inserts the keycard and they tumble inside in a fit of playful laughter.
With a soft click, the door swings shut behind them, shutting out the world and leaving Luna and Hongjoong alone in the room. Luna wastes no time, quickly kicking off her sneakers as he does the same, desire in her eyes as she looks at him. His pulse races as she nimbly removes her cardigan, letting it slide down her arms and drop to the floor. Her cropped tee follows suit along with her sweatpants, the clothes falling away to reveal her smooth skin and delicate curves that steal his breath.
"Are you completely certain about this?" he asks softly.
Luna nods emphatically, moving closer until her body is a hairsbreadth from his. Her hands encircle his neck, pulling him into a passionate, spine-tingling kiss as their bodies melt together. A low groan rumbles in his chest and she pushes him against the wall, grinding her hips against his stiff arousal. Lunas hands move down to pull at his sweatpants as he kicks them off. His hands caress her silky skin, tracing her curvy waist before grasping her hips. She tastes of sweet strawberries, inflaming his passion. Scooping her into his arms, he carries her to the expansive bed, their lips still joined in fiery bliss.
Luna gasps as Hongjoong climbs on top of the bed and drops her onto the middle of it, his body hovering over hers. She gazes up at him, her large doe-like eyes full of longing and desire, her lower lip lightly biting into as she tries to contain her emotions. Hands moving to his t-shirt she pulls it over his head revealing his toned chest and abs. Her fingers delicately run over his chest, each touch leaving a lingering trail of fire that spreads throughout his body. Luna wraps her arms around his shoulder, pulling him closer as their lips meet in another passionate kiss.
Hongjoong can't get enough of her, his hands exploring her skin, feeling the softness beneath his touch. He can't get enough of her, can't get close enough. He needs to feel every inch of her, to make her his own for tonight. "You drive me fucking insane!" he moans, his breath hot against her neck. She gasps as he nips at her collarbone, his teeth grazing her sensitive flesh.
Hongjoong's lips continue a trail of fiery kisses down Luna's body, starting from her neck and making their way down to her stomach. With practised ease, he unclasps her bra and tosses it onto the floor. His feast upon the sight of her bare breasts, rising and falling with each ragged breath she takes. The intensity of his gaze and the way his eyes darken further, Luna suddenly feels shy. On instinct her hands cover herself causing Hongjoongs features to instantly soften and look at her. He sees the shyness in her face, her eyebrows lowered, the blush on her cheeks forming as she avoids his gaze.
With a gentle touch, Hongjoong caresses Luna's cheek. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, my love," he says softly, his other hand holding her waist gently. "I want to make you feel good," he continues, "but your comfort is more important to me. If anything feels wrong or you want me to slow down, say 'yellow' and I will stop immediately."
Hongjoong's words instantly soothes Luna's nerves as she slowly lowers her hands, allowing him to gaze upon her fully but his eyes stay fixed on hers.
“I just got shy for a second, but I am fine now.” she smiles threading her fingers in his hair
“Still… remember the word and say it if you need to.” he says, Luna nods in response, “Promise me!” he urges gently, wanting to hear her say the words
“I trust you and I promise,” she says pulling his head down to kiss him. Hongjoongs stomach flips at hearing her say she trusts him causing him to smile into the kiss. “Now, can you please continue what you were doing?” she adds with a mischievous grin on her face
As Hongjoong's lips meet her neck once more, Luna gasps, her body arching into his, the sensation of his kiss setting off a shiver down her spine. With a soft moan, Hongjoong takes one pert nipple into his mouth, delicately sucking on it before tracing his tongue in slow circles around it. Luna moans and arches her back, electricity coursing through her at the sensation. His other hand stroking along her side and hip until it reaches the elastic waistband of her underwear. With agonising slowness, he slides them down over her hips and thighs, revealing the delicate skin beneath.
Hongjoong watches, his breath hitching as he sees Luna spread her legs wide, revealing her pink, swollen folds. Groaning at how wet she is for him already, his cock twitches in anticipation, desperate to be inside her. He reaches up and trails kisses down her stomach, exploring the soft skin of her tummy before moving lower to tease her mound.
Without warning, his tongue plunges into her slick folds – eliciting a shocked gasp from Luna as a surge of pleasure courses through her body. Long, slow licks soon follow before Hongjoong's skilled tongue dances over her swollen clit – teasing and tormenting the sensitive bud until soft moans escape her lips. His strong hands clasp onto her hips and guide them downwards, greedily devouring her.
As he continues to lavish attention on Luna's quivering core, Hongjoong feels his own need grow more insistent with each feverish lick and nibble. Her intoxicating taste and aroma fill his senses, driving him to the brink of madness as he sinks deeper into her. Luna's fingers weave through his hair, tugging gently at the strands as his voracious tongue explores her depths – their connection only growing more powerful with each passing moment.
Eager to bring her to the edge of pleasure, Hongjoong delicately pushes 2 fingers into her entrance - curling them upwards in search of that elusive sweet spot. Luna lets out a loud groan, her legs almost clamping shut around his head as Hongjoong feels a soft spongy area inside of her and he knows instantly he’s found it. He pumps his fingers in and out of her, the wet squelching noises only adding to the eroticism of the moment.
"Joongie," she gasps, her fingers tightening in his hair. "Please."
"Please what?" he asks, his voice low and seductive. He knows exactly what she wants, but he wants to hear her say it.
“Please make me come,” Luna whines, her cheeks flushed with desire
Hongjoong smiles against her skin, relishing the feeling of her body responding to his touch. "Beg for it," he murmurs, his breath hot against her sensitive flesh.
Luna's eyes flutter open, and she looks at him with a mixture of desire and frustration. "Please, Hongjoong," she pleads. "I need to come. I need you."
Hongjoong groans at her words, his control slipping. He pumps his fingers into her harder and faster, his tongue continuing to dance over her clit.
"Yes, yes, yes!" Luna cries out, her body shaking as she reaches her peak. Hongjoong feels her muscles clenching around his fingers, and he knows he's brought her to the brink of pleasure. He continues to lavish attention on her quivering core, drawing out her orgasm until she’s limp and satisfied.
As the waves of pleasure subside, Luna opens her eyes to find Hongjoong watching her with an intense gaze. He slowly removes his fingers, sucking them clean before leaning down to capture her lips in a soft and loving kiss. A soft moan escapes Luna as she tastes herself on his lips.
After a moment of basking in the afterglow, Hongjoong pulls back and gently disentangles Luna's fingers that are still gripping onto his hair. He can tell she is still in a haze from her high so shifts his position, moving to lie next to her on the bed. Their bodies are still close, their bare skin touching in a comforting manner. His eyes never leave her face as he watches her slowly return from the euphoric state he had brought her to.
“Are you okay?” he asks softly as she turns her head to look at him
"Joongie," she whispers, letting out a breathy laugh. "That was amazing. You’re really, really good at that!”
Hongjoong smiles shyly at her reaction. "I loved hearing you moan my name like that," he admits, his voice low and filled with desire.
Luna's eyes soften as she gazes at him. "I want you," she whispers, her fingers trailing lightly over his chest. "I can't get enough of you."
A low, guttural sound escapes him as he leans in closer, brushing his lips against hers in a tender yet urgent kiss. "You have me, my love," he murmurs between kisses. "I've wanted you for so long."
Her hands roam over his chest, feeling the heat of his skin under her palms. "Show me, Joongie," she breathes out, barely audible. "Show me how much you want me."
“I will.” Hongjoong smirks against her lips
His heart races at knowing she wants him just as much as he wants her in this moment. Feeling her fingernails lightly dragging along his back, he pauses for a moment, breaking their kiss. He looks into her eyes, seeing the desire mirrored in his own. But before they go any further, there's something important he needs to address.
Remembering that she sat down with everyone a few nights ago to tell them that she’d had a sexual health check done, her tests had all came back clean. Mentioning to being on birth control as well and giving consent for them to take things further without condoms if they so desired. He couldn't help but admire her openness and trust in their relationship to do this. However he needed to hear her say the words before they go any further.
“Are you 100% sure you are fine without a condom?” he asks, his face going serious, “I have the latex free ones in my bag if you want to use them.”
“You sure you didn’t plan tonight to go this way?” she chuckles lightly, her hands running up his arms
“I swear I didn’t! I’ve just been very prepared,” he laughs back shyly. “For quite a while actually.”
“Well I do like a man who is prepared for any and all situations.” she replies pulling his head down to kiss him, “However, like I said the other day to all of you, I am on birth control. I have been since before I even met you guys to help with my periods and my tests are clean, so whatever you guys want to do is fine with me.”
“I just want to make sure you are definitely okay with it.” he replies
“I am…” she smiles back at him, “Now please Joongie, can you just have sex with me before I combust!”
He chuckles lowly against her skin, a rumble that sends a shiver down her spine before he pulls down the fabric of his black boxer shorts, freeing his painfully erect cock. Luna watches intently as it springs free, biting her lower lip feeling herself grow wetter with anticipation. Hongjoong grins at her reaction and positions himself between her legs. Her eyes move to his face as he licks his lips, a slow smirk spreading across his face. The same one he gets on stage when performing, the one that causes her to get weak in the knees and it hits harder now he is situated between her legs naked, the tip of his cock nudging against her core. "Are you ready for me, Luna?" His husky voice sends a jolt of desire straight through her
She nods eagerly, opening her legs wider for him as he leans down to place a soft kiss on her forehead.
"You are so beautiful, my love." he whispers as he slides into her in one smooth motion, groaning as how tight she feels around him. Luna's breath hitches as she feels him fill her up, her body stretching to accommodate him. She wraps her legs around his waist, pulling him closer as he begins to move inside of her.
“F-feels so good.” Luna whines, her walls tight around him
"You are so tight," he groans. Her hands run over his back and grip tightly onto him as he thrusts into her deeply causing her toes to curl and more loud moans spilling from her mouth. Feeling her body respond to his, Hongjoong quickens his pace, each thrust more powerful than the last.
"Joongie…" she shudders as his teeth gently nip at her skin.
“Yes, my love?” he murmurs
"Turn me over...please!" Luna begs with desperation in her eyes.
Hongjoong captures her lips in a long, deep kiss before nibbling playfully on her earlobe. "As you wish," he whispers against her ear.
In one fluid motion, Hongjoong withdraws and flips Luna onto her stomach, eliciting a sharp gasp. He props a pillow under her hips and positions himself between her legs, his eyes drinking in the sight before him. His hands glide over her backside before entering her again, a tentative slap landing on her ass.
"Oh god," Luna moans loudly as he begins a steady rhythm
“Do you like that?” he smirks, “Does my pretty baby like being spanked?”
Luna gasps, arching her back and burying her face into the bed sheets as he pounds into her from behind. His thrusts are deep and hard, each one sending waves of pleasure through her body. “Y-yes!” Her fingers claw at the sheets, her hips bucking up to meet his forceful strokes with matching urgency. The tight clench of her walls around him draws a growling groan from his throat. His hand collides with her ass again, harder this time, prompting another clench around him.
Hongjoong leans forward, kissing up her back until his lips reach her neck. "You feel so good, Luna," he pants into her ear. "I could stay inside you forever."
"Don't stop, please don't stop," she begs.
Hongjoong chuckles darkly. "Oh trust me, I won't stop until you're completely satisfied, my love."
“Oh fuck! Joongie!” Luna's cry echo around the room as she clutches onto the sheets tighter. "S-sorry, I can’t… hold on."
“Don’t hold back.” he grunts, nibbling at her earlobe while grinding his hips against hers. He feels her body tease with impending pleasure. “Let go, my love,” he whispers, his free hand reaching around to delicately hold her neck.
Luna’s back arches as she surrenders to the overwhelming sensations coursing through her body. She cries out his name as the orgasm washes over her, her inner walls clenching around his length in waves of pleasure.
Hongjoong groans in response, slowing his movements to prevent himself from coming. His hand around her neck squeezing gently while his other arm wraps around her waist, holding her close to him as she trembles uncontrollably, little whimpers coming out her mouth.
“It’s okay, my love.” he whispers softly into her ear, stopping his hips completely “I’ve got you.”
As her tremors subside, Hongjoong gently releases his hold on her neck, his hand now tracing soothing circles on her damp skin. He pulls his upper body back, allowing Luna the space to breathe, his own breaths coming out in ragged pants as he tries hard not to thrust back into her.
“Joongie…” she mumbles as she relaxes, “You didn’t come.” She glances back at him.
He leans down and places a soft kiss on her lips as he pulls out of her.
“Because I wanted to make you come first and then make you come again on my cock.” he smirks adjusting their position
“You better!” she grins back allowing him to pull her body up onto her knees, her back flush with his chest as he lines himself back up with her entrance again
“Is this okay?” he asks, his voice has switched to soft and caring as he rubs her hips, “This isn’t sore on your knees, is it?”
“It’s fine, Joongie,” she smiles, reaching back to hold his head before capturing his lips and playfully biting his lower lip. “Please, fuck me again!”
"Whatever my baby want, my baby gets," he whispers, pulling her closer against him and positioning her so they are both sitting up on their knees, her back flush with his chest
Hongjoong's lips tease the side of her neck with tiny kisses and gentle bites as he slowly thrusts into her rhythmically eliciting small moans from Lunas mouth. Luna's body quivers with each thrust that sends new ripples of pleasure through her. His strokes become erratic in response to her rapidly increasing moans; the force behind each thrust rattles the bed frame beneath them. A powerful wave builds within Luna again with each solid pound into her.
Hongjoong's hand slides from her hip to between her legs, fingers finding and circling her sensitive clit in rhythm with his thrusts. The combination sends Luna spiralling toward her third orgasm of the night. His deep voice rumbles in pleasure-laden tones next to her ear. "You like that, don't you, baby?" he moans.
"Yes, Joongie, yes," her voice is higher pitched than usual, “Please, don’t stop!”
Hongjoong's pace quickens, his movements becoming more intense and primal as he edges closer to release. The tension between them builds, and Luna trembles in his firm hold. Her knees and thighs ache, her balance swaying as she clings to his arms for support. Sensing her struggle, he places both arms around her waist, slows his movements and delicately leans forward with her so is lying on her stomach once more.
“Do you want to lie down properly on your back?” Hongjoong asks gently, kissing her cheek
"Yes, please," Luna replies breathlessly, grateful for his care. He pulls out and helps her turn over, positioning her legs on his shoulders. His eyes meet her flushed face as he leans down, kissing her deeply as he pushes back inside.
“Is this more comfortable for you?” he whispers against her lips
"Mhm," she moans, already lost in pleasure. Her fingers run through his sweat soaked hair. "You feel incredible, Joongie," she says, eyes fluttering shut.
Hongjoong responds by increasing his pace, his hips slapping against Luna’s thighs as he drives deeper inside her. “You’re so tight and warm,” he groans.
Luna gasps, eyes as he hits a particularly sensitive spot, her fingers tightening on his arms. "Oh God, Joongie, right there," she pleads.
"Like this?" He adjusts his angle, hitting it again and again.
"Yes, yes, just like that," Luna moans, nails digging into his arms
Hongjoong continues to thrust into her, their bodies moving together in a smooth rhythm. "Luna, I'm getting close," he warns, his voice strained.
"Me too," she whines
"God, you feel incredible," Hongjoong praises as he feels Luna tighten around him. “Can I come inside you?”
Luna's eyes widen at his request, a mix of surprise and desire swirling in them. She nods eagerly, her voice barely a whisper. "Yes, Joongie!"
Hongjoong's pulse races at her words and the way she is now looking at him. The intensity of their connection grows as he picks up the pace, each thrust bringing them closer to the edge. "Hold onto me," he commands softly, moving her legs from his shoulders to his waist.
Luna complies, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulling him closer to her. “Kiss me, please.”
Hongjoong smiles sweetly before leaning down to capture her lips in a passionate kiss, their tongues dancing together as they move in perfect rhythm. "You drive me crazy, Luna," he mumbles against her lips.
Luna gasps, her nails digging into Hongjoong's back. "Don't stop, Joongie. I'm almost there."
Hongjoong's moans grow deeper as he nears release. He thrusts harder and faster as control slips away. Luna's walls clench around him, urging him on. With a final, desperate groan, he releases inside of her. His cock throbs and pulses, filling her with his hot release. Her walls contract around him, her own climax crashing over her in waves. He relentlessly pounds into her, prolonging their ecstasy, until finally collapsing onto her in a satisfied haze.
Hongjoong feels Lunas heart racing against his chest, her breath hot and heavy against his neck. He delicately holds her head, keeping her close, as they both come down from the high, placing soft kisses on her shoulder. The room is filled with the sounds of their heavy breathing and the sweet scent of sweat and sex. Hongjoong's cock twitches inside of her, still hard and throbbing.
Despite being exhausted and sensitive he can’t help but subtly move his hips. Luna lets out a small moan, moving her legs around his waist again, pulling them higher, urging him to continue.
“Again?” he whispers, looking at her through hooded lids
“Please.” she replies softly
He slowly moves his hips, thrusting into her gently as their lips connect. The instant pleasure of the gentle movements contrasts sharply with their previous rough activity but feels more intimate. Luna moans softly against his lips as he intertwines their fingers, continuing with slow yet precise movements.
Their bodies move in a harmonious rhythm, each thrust more languid than the last but still providing an intense pleasure to them both. The room, once filled with their passionate cries and noisy groans, now echoes with soft whispers and quiet moans. Their connection deepens, transcending into an emotional bond that neither of them had anticipated. Hongjoong can already feel himself on the edge but is holding back with all his might. Too embarrassed to admit he is ready to come from this slow encounter.
“Joongie…” she lightly whines, her small fingers grip tightly onto his hand, their intertwined fingers forming a bond that signifies their unity in this moment. “I-i’m close.”
“I’m close too, my love,” he smiles, relieved she is on the edge as well.
Luna arches her back in ecstasy, surrendering herself completely to the pleasure he is giving, her 4th and final orgasm of the night washing over her. “oh god, oh god, oh god.” Her quiet moans become soft cries of pleasure, echoing throughout the room as their passion reaches its climax. Hongjoong empties himself into her again. Once more relishing the sensation and intimacy of having no barrier between them.
In that final moment of utter bliss, they hold onto each other tightly, as if afraid to let go of this intoxicating connection. Their heavy breathing slowly subsides as they come down from the euphoric highs they've reached together.
Hongjoong can feel Luna's body relaxing beneath him, her grip on his body finally loosening. He finally pulls out slowly, wincing at the sensitivity of it all. His eyes catch sight of his cum leaking out of her.
“Shit,” he mumbles, grabbing his discarded boxers from the floor to gently clean the fluid from her.
After cleaning her up he throws his boxers aside and lies back down next to Luna. She instantly curls her body into his as he puts an arm around her. The silence in the room is comfortable, their bodies intertwined. Hongjoong's fingers trace lazy circles on Luna's skin, his touch gentle and soothing. His eyes watch her as she takes a deep breath, starting to come around. Her fingers begin to move gently against his bare chest.
"Wow," Luna finally says, her voice filled with wonder and satisfaction. "That was fucking incredible." a breathy laugh escapes her mouth
Hongjoong smiles down at her. "You're incredible," he corrects her, brushing a sweat soaked lock of hair from her forehead placing an affectionate kiss on her lips, “Was.. it okay for me to come inside you like I did?” he asks nervously
Luna giggles softly, trailing her fingers gently down Hongjoong's damp chest. "It felt amazing, Joongie," she reassures him with twinkling eyes. “Both times!”
“I should have asked beforehand, not in the moment like that.” he says
“If I didn’t want you to I would have said. In the heat of the moment or not, I still know what I want and what I don’t.” she smiles at him “And I knew the second you asked that I wanted you to. I trust you completely Hongjoong.”
Hongjoong exhales a relieved sigh, his concern fading as he gazes into Luna's eyes. "I treasure your trust, Luna. I just want to make sure you're comfortable and happy."
Leaning closer, Luna brushes her lips against his cheek, leaving a trail of feather-light kisses. "I am so happy with you," she whispers sincerely. “And with the others too.”
“I am glad.” he replies kissing her forehead and feeling a joy in his chest he hadn’t felt for a long time.
After a few more moments of comfortable silence, Hongjoong breaks the quietude with a soft question. "Do you want me to order us some food from room service?"
“I’m not hungry, I ate way too much for dinner plus the snacks on the rooftop.” she answers, “But if you are, go ahead and order something!” she adds
"I'm not hungry either, just thought you might be." He pauses, then adds, "We'll cuddle for a bit longer, but then you're drinking some water. You need to hydrate after all that!"
“You take such good care of me!” Luna smiles nuzzling her head further into his chest.
"Then it's a shower before coming back to bed. We have another full day tomorrow with the fansign and other schedules, so we need a proper sleep together." he says
"You want me to stay the night?" she asks, slightly surprised.
“Of course I do!” Hongjoong says looking down at her, “Why wouldn’t I?”
“I don’t know. I guess I took you for a wanting to sleep alone kinda person.” she admits, feelings her cheeks warm
“You are always welcome in my bed anytime you want.” he smiles kissing her forehead
“For cuddling and sleeping… or other stuff?” she grins playfully
“For whatever you want, my love but if you want ‘other stuff’ then I’ll be kicking Seonghwa out!” he laughs “He can bunk with San!”
Luna laughs softly as she cuddles into him again, her heart overflowing with feelings for him, for all of them. She smiles at all the memories she is making and the cherished memories yet to come. But she knows the night she has just spent with Hongjoong, and how insanely intimate it became at the end and the newly formed bond they’ve created will forever be etched into her soul.
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Taglist: @kiwibaekie @fudgeflyssworld @kodzukein @khjcoo @pepperony-7 @ateez-babygirl @starillusion13 @truthbehindthereflection @livingdeadlisa @stayteezdreams @atinyapple1117
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kairoot · 11 months ago
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𝐀𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐫𝐚’𝐬 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐱. | 𝐊𝐇𝐉. (TEMPORARY HIATUS.)
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PAIRING ▸ prince!hongjoong x princess!female!oc
GENRE ▸ royal au, arranged marriage, strangers to lovers, fluff, angst, suggestive
WARNINGS ▸ mentions of death, blood, arrows, etc. (Loria’s ethnicity is not mentioned in this story but words like ‘brown, golden, etc.’ will be used to describe her skin indicating that she is a POC.)
SYNOPSIS ▸ Loria B. Valenti III, the crown princess of Aibira harbors a deep passion for archery along with a strong disinterest of marriage. Loria faces the pressure of needing to find a beneficial royal suitor by the wishes of her family, in hopes of bringing the Kingdom of Aibira an increase in alliance and power. The princess meets 2 potential suitors, but only one of them seems to get her attention. Hongjoong Kim, crown prince of Aurora succeeding in his goal of courting her highness by his reciprocated passion for the arrow between his fingers. Much to his dismay the other suitor, Evrin Remington crown prince and king to be of Kairos is adorned with wealth, knowledge, power, and his heir to the throne appeals to the royals of Aibira. His and Loria’s marriage would bring many benefits to her and his country. Despite the circumstances Evrin has yet to give up on Loria, his greed and desire for the princess drives him to form an alliance with those closest to her, the goal being to remove Hongjoong and make room for himself. Will they succeed?
MILAN’S NOTE ▸ this series was made in collaboration with @telail !! and the cover art designed by her as well. thank you so much for helping me come up with this series, i honestly couldn’t have done it without you and your amazing brain <3
CHAPTERS ➴
𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈 | — Suitors’ Rounds
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𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @telail @thefantasycorner @skzline — message or comment to be added.
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lunardragon00 · 10 months ago
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The Heir (Choi San x OC)
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Masterlist:
Characters Th Great Houses Introduction
ACT ONE:
Chapter 1: The Realms Delight Chapter 2: The Confrontation Chapter 3: Prayer to the Gods Chapter 4: Reunions Chapter 5: A Cause for Celebration Chapter 6: From this day, until the end of my days
ACT TWO:
Character Update Chapter 7: Homecoming Chapter 8: Embers of Ambition Chapter 9: Bonds of Dragons Chapter 10: Strained Alliances Chapter 11: Echoes of Flight and Fury Chapter 12: The Hunt (04/05) Chapter 13: Betrayal and Bloodshed (04/06)
ACT THREE:
coming soon....
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appynonna · 3 months ago
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Our Universe
Chapter 11: Angel Baby Pairing: Poly!OT8xoriginal chararters Rating: 18+ Word Count: 2,387 Words
Trigger Warning: pet names.
This is a work of fiction. By no means is it meant to be taken seriously and does not reflect on the people used within the story.
Previous Chapter -> Here
Master list -> Here
Arthur notes: Hello, Deary I am sorry for the long wait. It has been a lot between school, work, Life, Friends, and Doctor appointments. I have been officially diagnosed with PTSD, no surprise to anyone. I have the next chapter started and it will hopefully be out by the
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Everything was fuzzy, and my head was pounding. I could still feel my momma pulling my hair and dragging me across the floor, I could hear her screaming at me as she cut my light brown curls out.
Her words cut deeper than the shears ever could, Making my heart bleed. If this is what my mom thought it had to be true. Maybe I was what she was saying.
"Angle?" It wasn't her voice this time, It was soft but deeper. I looked around trying to find it but everything was still so fuzzy. "Angel baby" It called out again. "Can you hear me" It continued "I'm right here, We haven't left you" It kept calling out.
-3rd Person POV-
Yeosang patted Seonghwa on the shoulder standing up "I'll be just inside if you need me" Then, I walked inside to a Concerned Mingi looking at him. Wooyoung was distracted by the TV and Jongho looked when Mingi started to speak, Yeosang cut him off " Don't ask" He said sitting back down and Pulling out his phone.
"You still talking to that girl?" Mingi asked him as he was still playing with Woo in Mariocart. "What?" Jongho asked, "What girl?" He asked Mingi looking up from his book.
"Oh our little Yeosang knows" Mingi smirked "Yes, We are still talking. End of story" Yeosang Replied knowing that if he didn't give them something they would keep asking, Jongho Nodded " I can respect that" Jongho looked back down at his book as Mingi Nodded too, "well I can't" Woo whined " Your cheating on us" Wooyoung gasped loudly, " You have betrayed us!" He fakes cries onto Mingi's arm.
"Get the hell off of me" Mingi pushed Wooyoung off him " Leave Yeosang alone," A voice said from behind the sofa, Turning to find Hongjoong looking around the room "Where is Hwa?" He asked looking at Yeosang "Currently outside on the terrace talking to Yechan"
Hongjoong nodded before walking around to the side of the sofa where Wooyoung from Hongjoong. When he got over to him, Hongjoong grabbed Wooyoung by the back of the back of the neck dragging him back down the hallway.
Wooyoung could be heard shouting as they went, "No, I'm sorry. I don't want to go to the bedrooms" Mingi laughed "Better him than me" He said laughing and turned from the TV to look at Yeosang. "Are you happy?" Mingi asked the older male, Yeosang smiled at him " I am" He told Mingi.
Mingi reached out to pat Yeosang's leg.
"That's all that matters," Mingi said and then held the controller to Yeosang "Want to go?" Yeosang nodded, taking the controller.
-Villa -
Yechan stayed in the closet on the off chance that she would be needed.
"Angel?" Seonghwa called out and Ari shook her head "No, you left me" She kept mumbling. "Angel baby" He called out again "Can you hear me?" Hwa asked the crying girl "I'm right here, Angel. We haven't left you" He kept going "You are safe Angel." Ari just shook her head
"Yechan are you still there" Seonghwa called out as Ari Started to Hyperventilate again.
"I'm here" Yechan called out. "Go get something that smells like me," He asked her. Standing up Yechan walked to the bathroom to look in the dirt hamper, but it was empty.
"Of course it's empty" SHe mumbled walking back to the bedroom, Matz was lying on the bed. The cat stared at her like he had been caught doing something bad "That will work" Yechan walked over to the bed getting Seonghwa's pillow. The cat lay down in the warm spot the pillow previously sat on.
Walking back over to the closet she could hear Ari's breathing "Ari. In through your nose, and out through your mouth" Seonghwa was trying to help the girl breathe the best he could from the other side of the phone.
Walking up to the girl with the pillow in hand, Ari was trying to get away as Yechan got closer. "I'm sorry Ari," She said shoving the pillow onto the girl's face. Boxing her in between the pillow and the wall.
"Yechan, what is going on" Hwa asked trying his hardest to see out with the phone pointing up. He was only able to see the underside of Yechan's breast with her kneeling over the phone.
"I'm smothering her obviously," She said in a smart-ass tone. Ari fought for a good few minutes and even managed to draw blood from Yechan's arm when she grabbed her with her nails.
Yechan was watching Ari closely. She finally stopped fighting and took a deep breath Wrapping her arms around the pillow and holding it tightly to her as she cried.
"Ari?" Yechan asked lightly, pulling the top of the pillow down, Ari hiccuped and looked at Yechan. "Channie?" Ari asked confused. Yechan couldn't stop her face from scrunching up to the horrible nickname, As she watched the younger girl more closely. Ari's eyes were rapidly unfocused then refocused "Yechan," she said again looking around the small room.
Seonghwa's clothes hung on the right side and Hongjoong's were on the left.
It was simple to tell what belonged to who. Seonghwa's clothes always had a more feminine touch as hongjoong stuff was mostly pieces he made himself.
"Why are we in the closet? Ari was still very much confused by the look on her face.
-Ari's Pov-
The feeling of something push up to my face. No matter how hard I was fighting, it wouldn't move away.
I fought against it not wanting to end here, I needed to get back to Hongjoong and the other. I could leave like this, Having them think I left without a goodbye.
They would never forgive me.
I faintly could smell the black coffee with a hint of vanilla that reminded me of Seonghwa. I could feel the energy leaven me as I fought less. The bittersweet coffee left me with a warm feeling inside my chest.
I could feel myself starting to cry as the fight left my body. I'm sorry Seonghwa.
"Ari?" A voice above me said as the coffee and vanilla smell left. Channie, It was Yechan.
As the light came into focus, I could feel the headache rapidly approaching. Looking around I found that Yechan was Kneeling above me.
I looked around confused, seeing that we were at. Sitting in the closet of my lovers, I looked back at Yechan. "Why are we in the closet?"
Yechan laughed sitting back down and then picking up the phone that was lying in front of me on the floor. "She's back now," She said then looked at me "Good morning Bunny," Yechan said then turned her phone to me.
Seonghwa looked through the phone at me smiling, His brilliant white teeth shining in the low light. I slowly reached taking the phone from Yechan, "What happened?" I looked back up at Yechan. She emailed and pushed a piece of hair behind my ear.
"Let's go downstairs and talk," She said standing up and offering her hand. I let her help me up. Wrapping myself in Hwa's fur coat, Yechan helped me down the stairs slowly. My legs shook the whole short walk.
Between Yechan, Seonghwa, and Yeosang they were able to explain what happened. What was missed in the last 12 hours.
They told me what was found in my blood, Yechan filled them in with what all happened after they left and I told them the last thing I could remember—walking into the changing room at the new dress shop.
"There is where Yunho found you right?" Yeosang asked, I turned and looked at Yechan "Ya, it was." She was looking everywhere but the phone propped up in front of us as I sipped on water.
"What did you do" I turned to Yechan. She smirked and ran her tongue across her overly pointed canines. "No one to hurt, so don't worry about it" Yechan gave me a sweet smile.
"Oh," Yechan said after a second "You need to call Rhea" She then passed me my phone. The device had too many missed calls and texts to count.
"I told her you would call when you woke up," She said pushing me up "Beside your dogs need to pee" She smiled pointing a thumb toward three sleeping dogs. Not the first of them paying any attention to me.
I shook my head And gave a short whistle. Rocky started asleep but Django and Siren got up and hurried to my side.
Walking outside I sat down in the hammock next to the inground pool, Siren jumped up into the swing with me laying his white head on my chest. He looked up at me with his big blue eyes.
"I'm ok boy" I stretched the space between his ears.
Unlocking the phone I Open the messages. There were mostly messages from Rhea and Kai. A few from just random people I would talk to now and then.
I laughed when I opened Kai's messages. They started normal then turned into chaos very fast after about 20 minutes.
"hey hey hey hey hey, Are you dead? I bet you're ignoring me! Hey heye hey heye heye heye heye. Ari Ari Ari Ari Ari AAAAAARRRRRRIIII" And the messages kept going like for a while, By the time I got to the bottom my side was hurting from laughing. I messaged him back "Chill out my dude" A few moments later a message came back "Fine, I'll call off the search party," Kai replied
I didn't bother looking at Rhea's messages, I just went straight to calling her. Pulling up the phone's app it shows me all the most recent calls. It almost looked to be from Rhea, But one stood out the most.
Namjoon
That was weird I thought, I'll call him back in the morning. I called Rhea, She answered before the first was done.
"I'm awake" She shouted, I couldn't help but laugh at my friend "I awake" She stated again "Who is this?" Rhea asked then there was a rustling sound. Most likely Rhea checked her phone.
"Ahh," She suddenly screamed "Your alive" She was being dramatic at this point "Where have you been?" She asked, Her voice still full of the sluggishness from just waking up as she was becoming more aware.
I told her it was a long story to try not to make her panic. "It's only 3 am, I got time," She said then made a sound "Get your fat furry ass off me," Rhea said suddenly "ok, I'm back. Now explain"
By the tone of her voice, I knew this was about to be bad. "Rhea, I don't know if you want to know. It's not too serious. I was only drugged, That's it" I said trying to Deescalate the issue, Hoping that she would drop it "You what?" She screamed at me, I could hear the cats in the background running.
Pulling the phone away from my ear, I was still able to hear her but not make out what she was saying "Are you done yet?" I asked. She screamed "no" at me and then kept yelling. I was unable to understand her fully as she rapidly kept switching back and forth between what sounded like a mix of Korean and Spanish.
Starting the sentence in one language and ending in a different one.
The phone then disconnected. I looked at my phone and then back to Siren. "I think I made her mad," I told the pearl-colored dog.
Walking back inside Yechan was still on the phone with what looked to be Seonghwa, He was leaning back laughing on the other side of the phone as she said something to him that I didn't quite get.
Walking over I sat next to Yechan whose arm was thrown over the back of the sofa, Pulling the coat over my legs.
"I'm guessing that San changed my clothes?" I asked no one in particular, as I was wearing the set that San had the matching set to. "He did" Hwa answered, then looked up. "Did you eat breakfast?" He asked, Knowing my old eating habits. I shook my head "No, but I ate some pizza around lunch at Rhea's salon" I told him hoping he would drop it.
The unspoken rule was as long as you were honest no one could get mad, Sometimes it doesn't always work but we try.
"You need to get something for dinner, Ari." He chuckled a little "Or an early breakfast at this point" Seonghwa added, Yechan got up "I'll make her something" She said heading to the kitchen, I turned getting on my knees as she walked into the kitchen. "I'm not hungry" I yell "Too bad. You're going to eat." Yechan yelled back as the pantry door opened.
"Ari, as much as I like this view of your ass," Seonghwa said behind me. I turned back to him. Picking up the phone I looked at the screen and laid on the sofa using the blanket draped over the back as a pillow.
I could smell Mingi's expensive colognes on it. It was a strange combination, but it fit him perfectly. A mixture of Mandarin, Cedar, Sage, and Seasalt.
"What is it, Angel?" Seonghwa asked as I snuggled into the blanket and fur coat, surrounded by the smell of my family. "Nothing, Just missing you," I told him.
Seonghwa smiled at me "I miss you too, Angel" His eyes were happy little crescents in the pale light. "Look at this" he turned the switch around showing me what he had been playing. His eyes poked out from behind it, and a gust of wind swept his hair to the side. "Your hair is getting long," I told him, His eyes narrowed with a smile. " I know," he said then pointed to the screen.
"This one is me" He pointed to the little human person, then to what looked like a hamster "This is Flurry, She is friends with Judy" he pointed to the pink and blue bear "And this one back here is Bill" I laughed at him as he kept rambling on about his animal crossing village.
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raylawrites · 2 months ago
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𝓘𝓷𝓿𝓲𝓭𝓲𝓪 ~ New Chapter ~ Gunshot
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A long awaited new chapter! Things get intense in this installment, so make sure to give it a read when you can!
Preview:
The Harbinger abruptly stands up, shoving the knife back into his belt, and spans the length of the room in seconds, grabbing my collar and walking me backwards until my back hits the wall to the right of the door.
“Why should I believe a single word that leaves your filthy mouth, huh?” He hisses, lips pulled back into a grimace. I feel the familiar fiery burn of hatred bubbling up inside me as the man stares me down, willing me for an answer. “Not only that, but you dare to just step in here unannounced? Unaccompanied? You’re a bloody damn fool if you thought I would just listen to you-“
His grip on my shirt slackens slightly, allowing me to roughly shove him off, keeping his stare all the while. “First of all, fuck you.” I start. ‘Second, that ship you’re moving to attack, your highness, is a stolen warship IIX run by a bunch of marauders, ask Wooyoung if you don’t believe me.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Read on Wattpad here
Read on Ao3 here
Word count: 4.1k
Content warnings: swearing, graphic depictions of violence.
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hwalyn · 1 year ago
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ateez social media au !
summary ! katie was always the top of her class, her projects and assignments were the ones teachers used as examples in class, and she never, ever got a failing grade. so why is her professor now telling her that a soundtrack is going to make or break her grade? and why does the person helping her have to be one of the members of the group she’s listed as her personal enemies? can this final be turned in safely?
pairing ! student!hongjoong x fem!oc
genre ! non idol au, university au, angst, fluff, the actual enemies to lovers
warnings ! cursing, some kys jokes, hongjoong is kind of an ass, teacup drama . . . tba
START ! . . . 09/26/24
END ! . . .
join the taglist here taglist will be closed at 50 !
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00 updated profiles
01 my career is basically over !
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atzaurora · 1 month ago
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[˗ˏˋ ´ˎ˗] ℱ𝒐𝒓𝒃𝒊𝒅𝒅𝒆𝒏 ℒ𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒔.﹙김홍중﹚(1.1k)
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𖥔 student!gn!reader x teacher!hongjoong ; teacher x student, secret/forbidden lovers ⸼જ You and your teacher, Mr. Kim, are having some 'fun' in between lessons... ➤ imagine (smut) .ᐟ.ᐟ 18+/smut content, MDNI!!! teacher/student relationship, age gap (10 years, 18 & 28), unprotected sex (oral), m receiving oral sex, power imbalance, public setting (in school), dubious consent/morality .ᐟ.ᐟ
꒰🖇꒱ I've been so inactive y'all, I'm sorry :'( I'm trying post more again! hope you like this fic tho enjoyyy
if you have any ideas or wishes let me know, requests are open
here's my [𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕]! ; [𝒓𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕] here! ; [about me] ; [guidelines]! my tiktok
reblogs appreciated
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It was wrong. So, so wrong. Not only was he ten years older than you, he was also your teacher. But the forbidden nature of it only added to the intoxicating allure. How could you resist when Mr. Kim had been so quick to respond to the way you flirted with your gaze, his dark eyes locking onto yours in class, silently acknowledging the unspoken tension between you?
And now here you were, kneeling beneath his desk, giving him the best head of his life, your lips wrapped tightly around his throbbing erection as his breath hitched with every flick of your tongue. ── ࣪˖ MORE BELOW
"Fuck, just like that, sweetheart," Mr. Kim groaned lowly, his voice dripping with lust as he tangled his fingers into your hair, tightening his grip. He guided you, pushing your head down further, forcing more of his thick length into your mouth.
You squeezed your eyes shut, focusing on taking as much of him as you could. His tip nudged the back of your throat, and to your surprise and satisfaction, you managed to suppress your gag reflex, allowing him to slide in even deeper. Your hands gripped his thighs tightly for support, steadying yourself as you bobbed your head up and down, creating a rhythm that had him moaning in approval.
His head tipped back slightly, his lips parting as he lost himself in the feeling of your warm, wet mouth wrapped around him. "You're doing so well, Y/N," he praised, his voice thick with pleasure, the hint of desperation barely concealed as his hips bucked upward slightly, urging you to take more.
You opened your eyes again, peeking up at him, your gaze wide and innocent despite the sinful act you were performing. The sight of your pretty eyes staring up at him while you sucked him off made him smirk, a dark, twisted smile that only fueled the heat growing between your legs. "So, so pretty," he muttered, his hand shifting from your hair to cup your cheek, his thumb gently brushing over your flushed skin.
There was something about the way he looked at you through his glasses—those deep brown eyes gleaming with lust behind the thin frames—that was absolutely mesmerizing. It was fucked up in the most exhilarating way. You could never get enough of those eyes, the way they burned into you during class when he couldn’t touch you, couldn’t act on the desires that simmered beneath the surface. He knew it, too. He knew exactly what effect his gaze had on you, and it only made his control over you more delicious.
"Come on, baby," he growled softly, his voice rough and strained as he neared his climax. "Just a little more... I'm almost there." The tremor in his voice sent a thrill down your spine, knowing how close he was, how much power you held in that moment.
You rolled your eyes back, hollowing your cheeks as you increased your pace, the wet sounds of your mouth working his cock filling the small, private space under his desk. His hips bucked again, more forceful this time, and his cock hit the back of your throat, making you gag slightly. He groaned at the sensation, his grip on your head tightening.
Moments later, you felt him twitch in your mouth, and with a loud moan, he released thick ropes of cum, spilling into your throat. You swallowed it down without hesitation, his salty essence coating your tongue as you continued to milk him, making sure to take every last drop. Only when he was completely spent did he pull out, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to catch his breath.
He cupped your chin, lifting your face to meet his gaze as he inspected you with a smirk. "Let me see, angel." His thumb tugged your lower lip down, and you obediently opened your mouth, showing him that you had swallowed like the good girl you were.
"Good job," he murmured approvingly, his voice soft but commanding. His words of praise always had a way of making your knees weak, and he knew exactly how much you craved his approval. "You deserve to be rewarded, don’t you?"
Mr. Kim leaned back in his chair, still catching his breath, and casually reached for the grade sheet on his desk. With the same pen he used for marking assignments, he jotted down a perfect A beside your name, the sound of the ink scratching against paper filling the otherwise quiet room.
You chuckled, the sound light and teasing as you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand and began fixing your hair. "Thank you, sir," you whispered sweetly, your tone laced with playful innocence as you climbed out from beneath the desk.
He raised an eyebrow, his lips quirking into a half-smile as he turned to look at you. "We’ve talked about this, darling. Call me by my name when we’re alone." His voice was gentle but firm, the authority in his tone unmistakable.
You leaned down, brushing your lips softly against his cheek from behind, your breath warm against his skin. "We’re still in school," you teased, your voice low. "I have to stay professional, don’t I?" The irony of your words was not lost on either of you, and you both chuckled at the absurdity of it all. Nothing about this situation was professional in the slightest.
He shook his head, his laughter soft and warm as he gestured toward the door. "You’d better get going, sweetheart. You don’t want to be late for your next class." His tone had shifted slightly, taking on a more serious edge now that the moment was coming to an end. The bell would ring soon, signaling the end of the break, and you needed to be gone before anyone noticed anything suspicious.
You nodded, gathering your things as you prepared to leave, but not before sending him one last mischievous smile. "See you tomorrow, Mr. Kim. Oh, and you might want to fix your pants before the students start coming in," you added cheekily, nodding toward the evidence of your earlier activities.
He glanced down, a faint flush creeping up his neck as he quickly adjusted himself, his eyes narrowing playfully at your teasing. "Go on, get out of here," he muttered, though there was no real bite in his words. He loved how you always managed to leave him wanting more, even after you’d just given him everything.
With a wink, you slipped out the door, the thrill of what had just transpired still buzzing in your veins.
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dysfunctional-bun-bun · 4 months ago
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Hello everyone, I know I haven't posted in a while. Long and short of it is I'm getting kicked out. I was working on a peice for @cynicalrosebud and others but life got in the way. I am currently fighting to get on disability, and honestly, I am so tired. I can't work because I can and will be discriminated against for my disorders. And the truth of it is…I NEED to open emergency Commissions rn.
So here is my plea. If you are able to donate or want to commission me. Please feel free to dm me.
Rules.
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT BE CREEPY.
Nothing illegal.
If you com me you must pay half upfront.
If YOU decide to back out after the sketch is done and the coloring has started, then there are only half refunds!
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sweetiesicheng · 3 months ago
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hongjoong - practice
word count : 719
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"come on, make it smooth. you look like a brick," one of the instructors scolds as all of them watch each of you dance for your evaluations.
the music in the room stops playing once the last trainee finishes their evaluations. all of you listen to the instructors, taking in their comments.
afterwards, the instructors leave and some of the trainees leave to go to other lessons. you stay in the practice room and notice one of your friends still in the room too.
"you did good today," you praise your friend.
hongjoong sits on the floor with his back against a wall. he shrugs, dismissing your comment. "i guess," he says to you.
"well, you got yelled at the least," you say and grab your water bottle. you drink some water before going to the sound system and playing one of the songs you had been learning.
you go into the center of the room and start practicing the choreography to the song, trying to make it look like the original artist's style. as you practice, hongjoong gets up and joins you. it's a pretty difficult song, but he makes it look easy.
once the song is over, another song plays and you continue dancing while hongjoong stops. he doesn't know the choreography to this song.
"when did you learn this?" he asks, clearly confused since you and him are usually in the same dance sessions.
"oh, i learned it by myself one night. i couldn't sleep so i just kept dancing," you mention. "it's not that hard though," you add.
"you look cool dancing to this," hongjoong compliments you.
you smile, "thanks," you reply but mess up the next steps. "you jinxed me!"
"hey, you're the one talking while dancing," hongjoong replies with a laugh. you start laughing while trying to catch up with the music.
when the song ends, you go over to the sound system and look at the songs that are queued up.
"hey hongjoong?" you call the other trainee. "teach me something," you request.
"teach you something? like what?" he asks.
you shrug, "you've been here longer than me. shouldn't you know more stuff?" you ask him.
"i don't know everything. i've been learning how to produce music lately," he mentions. "that's why i'm usually not in here," he adds.
"producing? do you want to go into that?" you ask, turning the sound system completing off.
hongjoong nods, "yea. when we debut, i want to create all of our group's music," he says. "do you want to go to the studio? i can show you one of my favorites," he offers.
"really?" you ask.
he nods with a smile, "yea. let's go."
both of you leave the practice room and head to one of the studios that hongjoong frequently uses. when you go inside, you notice a bunch of stuff littered around.
"ignore the mess," he says to you. "happens when i'm working." hongjoong goes to the computer and sits down on the chair. he starts going through files while you stand next to the chair. "oh, this one is my favorite," he says and starts playing on the songs.
music blares from the speakers, but hongjoong turns it down a bit. you listen to the song where a few people sing and rap. you recognize the voices as other trainees as well as hongjoong.
"this is really good, hongjoong," you praise him when the song ends. "you're gonna go big."
he chuckles, "wouldn't that be nice?" he says and starts pulling up the programs that he uses.
"i'm serious, hongjoong. you are," you say to him.
"we're both gonna make it, y/n. we can be each other's number one fans," he says to you. "wanna learn something? you can make your debut song too."
"oh hell yea," you reply and move stuff on a chair so you can pull it up and sit down. "where do we start?"
hongjoong laughs, "got a long way to go. go over here," he says and starts showing you the different functions of the music program.
luckily, you two don't have any other lessons, or else you'd probably get in major trouble. as the day lingers into night, hongjoong teaches you how to make a beat and different ways to play around with the music.
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silver-hwaberry · 5 months ago
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TWENTY: time to fly
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Warnings: brief mentions of scars, anxiety including medication, swearing
Word count: 13.5K
Summary: The group prepares for their first work trip and flight with Luna but she is finding things hard. The others are there to support her through it. Meanwhile new feelings are revealed by more than one person.
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Luna looks around her room, sighing in frustration at the mess laying before her eyes. She was sitting on the floor of her bedroom, in the middle of a jumble of clothes, no organisation at all. She sighs once more and throws herself backwards. She had always hated packing, even as a child constantly uprooting to new towns. But this trip was different. It was not a vacation; it was a work obligation necessitating more than fun clothes and toiletries. She lets out another annoyed grumble.
“What is all this growling I keep hearing from in here?” Seonghwas calm voice comes from the doorway
A wide grin spreads across his face as he gazes down at her, lying on the floor in her comfortable pyjama shorts and a cropped t-shirt. He couldn't help but notice that she had been wearing more t-shirts lately around the safety of the apartment instead of her usual long sleeved tops. Still wearing bracelets but not as many as before too. It seemed to Seonghwa that she was feeling more comfortable at home.
"I hate this!" she grumbles, flinging her arms up dramatically before slapping them back down over her eyes.
“You look like you’re floating in a sea of clothes!” he laughs
“I hate packing.” she says, Seonghwa laying down beside her too
“I don’t want to pressure you but I can see lots of things everywhere, only 3 pairs of socks in your very large suitcase and we leave in 4 hours.” he says softly, rolling onto his side and placing a hand on her exposed stomach
Luna emits another elongated groan. "I hate it!"
He laughs again. "Okay darling, let me help you pack then!"
Seonghwa moves her arms off her face, his smile widening at her pouty expression. Unable to resist, he leans down pressing his lips to hers. Luna smiles against his kiss, comforted by his patience and willingness to help despite her surliness.
In the days since the others returned home, a hectic schedule prevented Luna from sitting down with Seonghwa and Yunho. But an easy happiness had settled over the apartment. The guys relentlessly rehearsed for their upcoming tour and performance at KCON LA, their impending destination.
While the others had packed expertly, Luna struggled to prepare for her first work trip with the band. She had no idea what to bring.
"Thanks, Hwa," she mumbles after they part, feeling some of the tension lift off her shoulders.
He chuckles softly. "We’re a team, right?"
She nods, feeling a warmth spread through her as he gently starts organising the clothes around them. "I just wish I was better at this stuff. I’ve always hated packing." she picks up a pair of jeans and begins to fold them. “Probably because we moved so much as a kid. And on short notice too.”
Luna haphazardly folds clothes into her open suitcase. Beside her, Seonghwa meticulously folds her clothes, his movements fluid and precise even as he steals glances at her.
“Excited about heading back to the States?” Seonghwa inquires, his tone thoughtful.
“I can't wait! It's been too long since my last visit,” Luna replies with a smile
“When was the last time you were there?” he asks
“3 years ago for my Grandma Parks funeral.” she replies
Seonghwa pauses folding the sweatshirt in his hands and gazes at Luna.
Though she hides it well, he can see the glint of sadness in her eyes behind her glasses.
"I'm sorry," he says sympathetically. "I didn't know. I wouldn't have asked if I did."
"It's okay," Luna reassures him, meeting his gaze.
"Come here," he beckons, opening his arms for her to come sit on his lap. She obliges, wrapping her legs around his waist as he embraces her.
She melts against him, comforted by the steady thrum of his heartbeat. His fingers trace slow circles on her back as she breathes deeply, composing herself.
“I miss her, but she was an incredible woman.” Luna's voice is wistful as she reminisces. “She used to call me her 'little bunny' because I was so short as a kid, and when I was happy, I couldn't stop hopping around.”
“You still do that sometimes!” Seonghwa chuckles.
“I know!” she laughs along with him as she pulls back to look at him, “I got the little bunny tattoo on my ankle for her. She laughed so much when I showed her it. I thought she was going to be mad at getting a tattoo but she loved it. She always encouraged me to be creative and express my true self.”
"I did wonder about that cute bunny one," Seonghwa grins. "All your tattoos are so unique and interesting. Each one seems to have a little story attached to it. Would you get more?”
“Oh 100%!” she nods, “I am going to get something to cover up my scars soon. I need to wait a little longer before I can get it done. Most days I am fine with them, like they are just a part of me but some days it hurts seeing them and a reminder of a dark period that I want to move on from.”
Seonghwa nods thoughtfully, his fingers gently tracing over her scars. She had been allowing him to touch them briefly and place kisses on them but he could sense her unease if he looked at them for too long. "I’ve heard covering up scars with tattoos can be empowering. It's like turning something painful into something beautiful."
Luna smiles appreciatively at his understanding of her feelings. “That is exactly what I want to do. My therapist says it can be a mentally healing process too. I thought she was going to tell me that covering them would be like an avoidance thing but she was all for it when I told her my plans a couple of months ago.”
“I am glad you have such a good therapist. Someone who understands you and your needs.” he says kissing her
Luna feels a warm rush inside her as he kisses her, his lips soft against hers. The scent of Luna's floral perfume lingers in Seonghwa's senses as he gently breaks the kiss. He smiles at her, his eyes soft and understanding.
“We should get back to packing.” she says sliding off his lap, sitting beside him so she can still be close
“Where is your favourite place in America?” he asks as they return to packing the case
Luna pauses, reminiscing. “Hmm, Chicago, for sure. My dad's parents were based there, and my Grandma Lee still lives there. I’m hoping to see her when we're on tour.” A wistful smile graces her lips.
"That's great, Luna. We'll ensure you get lots of time with her," Seonghwa promises. "Any other family there?"
"Not really." She shakes her head. "Dad has a sister, but they don't speak. I only met her once, at Grandpa Lee's funeral. She ignored us completely. As for my mom, her only sibling is Uncle Jihoon and he moved here at the same age I did."
Seonghwa considers probing deeper into her estranged aunt but hesitates, not wanting to reopen old wounds. "How was life in New York?" he asks instead, steering the conversation to safer waters.
"I wouldn't know! I only lived there for 3 days!" Luna replies before laughing heartily at seeing his puzzled expression, "I was born two weeks early while my parents were preparing to move to Nashville. But three days before our move, I decided to jazz things up a bit!"
She goes on to recount her dramatic entrance into the world, born into her father's arm in the back of his pickup truck at the side of the road just days before their move to Nashville. Seonghwa listened with rapt attention, laughing as she described her mother managing a cross-country move and newborn simultaneously.
“I’m amazed at how Mom managed – relocating with a newborn while recuperating,” Luna comments. “Wish she'd passed down her packing skills!” she remarks as she fits the last clothing piece into her suitcase. “Thank you for helping me with this Seonghwa. I got myself into a mess and couldn’t claw myself out of it.”
“No problem, darling. We're always here to help. We've become experts at packing due to our constant travels, so you can always rely on one of us to help you with it." he assures her, “Are you all packed now?”
“Just need to finish my carry-on,” she replies, closing her suitcase.
"I didn't come across any swimsuit or bikini," he says, eyes dancing playfully.
Luna scoffs, smacking his arm lightly. "As if I'll have time for that!"
Seonghwa tugs her onto his lap, his breath warm against her neck. "You will. We always visit the hotel pool at the end of the day. The company gets it closed off, complete privacy."
Luna shakes her head, "I can't swim anyway, so no point." a shy smile forms on her face, feeling a bit embarrassed about her lack of swimming skills.
"Then you'll just have to hold on tightly to one of us," Seonghwa murmurs, trailing kisses along her jawline.
As Seonghwa's playful suggestion lingers in the air, Luna blushes lightly at the thought of holding onto him in the pool. She liked the idea of them all having fun together, being able to play around and relax even if she just watched on from the poolside.
"What if I drag you down with me?" she asks softly, fingers playing with his hair.
Seonghwa chuckles softly, his gaze warm and reassuring. “Don't worry, Luna. I'll keep us afloat. Besides, we can teach you some basic swimming techniques. It'll be fun.”
Luna's smile widens at the idea of learning to swim with Seonghwa by her side. “Okay, that sounds like a plan. I trust you all to keep me safe in the water.” she kisses him softly, “I better get myself dressed for the airport, put a bit of make up on so I look less scary!” she adds looking at the clock on her desk
“You look beautiful as you are!” Seonghwa smiles holding her hips as she stands up “I will take your case out then so it is ready to be collected.”
“Oh , could you look out my epi-pens from the kitchen?” she asks, “I’ll need to put them in my carry on bag.”
“Of course I can darling. Need anything else?” he asks
She shakes her head, “I’ll be out in about 10 minutes or so.”
Seonghwa nods and leaves her bedroom pulling her suitcase beside him. In the lounge, he adds it to the others piled behind the sofa. Jongho and San are seated at the kitchen island when Seonghwa enters.
"Luna all packed up?" San asks.
“Yeah, she's sorted,” Seonghwa replies, relief seeping into his voice. “Thanks for tipping me off about her needing help.”
San had picked up on the growls and grumbles coming from her bedroom door earlier. Knowing Seonghwa was the most adept packer among them, he'd made the call to enlist his help. Seonghwa moves towards the coffee and tea containers, his hand reaching out to pick up the two epi-pens that have been sitting untouched since Luna moved in.
Jongho's brows furrow with concern. "Why are you taking those? Is she okay?"
"She's fine. Just needs them in her carry-on," Seonghwa reassures.
San shudders. "Those things freak me out. The thought of ever needing to use them on her... I don’t like it!"
Seonghwa nods grimly. "Let's hope not. But if so, she taught us how to use them so we know what to do."
The conversation falls silent as each of them contemplates this reality. The tension in the room is palpable but necessary - a reminder of their shared responsibility towards Luna and their unwavering commitment to her safety.
Just then, Luna breezes into the kitchen, bright-eyed and smiling. She has put some basic make up on, wearing light blue baggy ripped jeans, a white cropped t-shirt with a white hoodie loosely open on top. Her hair is loose around her face with her glasses on. “Hey guys, what are you all talking about?”
“We were just discussing how well-prepared you are for the trip,” Seonghwa says warmly.
“Now I know that is a lie!” she laughs as San pulls her into his body for a hug, “I am the least prepared person to ever walk this earth! If it wasn’t for Seonghwa then I would still be floating in the sea of jumbled clothes on my bedroom floor, telling you all to go on without me!”
San's eyes crinkles with amusement, his pearly white teeth flashing in a grin. "We'd never leave you behind!" he assures her, punctuating his words with a tender kiss.
“And don't worry about a thing,” Jongho adds. “We'll make sure you have everything you need on this trip.”
“Well we haven’t even left the apartment yet and I am already a damsel in distress as I cannot find my mac book charger!” she says, her face blushing slightly as she pulls away from San to sit beside Jongho at the kitchen island
“Ah that we can help with! We have a supply of spare chargers because our dear captain has a habit of losing his so we bought extras!” Seonghwa replies handing Luna the epi-pens. “I will go get you one.” he adds placing a kiss on her lips
“Thank you.” she whispers to him
As Seonghwa leaves to get her a spare charger, Luna gives the epi-pens checks to make sure they are in working order as Jongho and San eye her closely. Satisfied the devices are in good working condition, she puts them into her black backpack, unaware of the anxious eyes of the 2 men on either side of her.
“How was your dinner with your family last night?” San asks as she looks back at them with a smile
“Dad and Uncle Jihoon were manning the grills and trying to outdo one another with their cooking skills.” she laughs, “My cousins Seojun and Dongjae were just eating everything! It was nice chilling out with them all before this trip. When we come back my parents and the twins will be in Jeju then they go to Kyoto so I won’t see them again for another 2 weeks. You should've heard Hyejin trying to persuade me to smuggle her in my suitcase so she can tag along to LA.”
“That’s cute!” Jongho smiles
“She is excited to meet you all when they get back, they both are.” Luna replies
Since the guys found out that the twins were Atiny and had saw them in Wembley Arena earlier that year they were excited to meet the two little fans. They had given Luna their blessing to disclose who she works with to them as well and the second the girls found out they were asking to visit Luna at work.
"Who are their biases?" San asks, unable to contain his curiosity.
Jongho laughs and shakes his head. “You cannot just ask that!”
Just then, Seonghwa walks back into the kitchen, charger in hand. He plants a tender kiss on Luna's forehead before passing her the cord. "Can't ask what?"
“Who Lunas little sisters biases are!” Jongho answers
Luna's eyes glimmers with amusement. "If I tell you, do you promise not to get jealous?"
“We promise!” San exclaims, his face lit up with joy.
“Hyejin's bias is Wooyoung and her bias wrecker is Jongho.” Luna reveals as San pouts slightly, earning an evil chuckle from Jongho.
Luna turns to Jongho, surprise flashing across her face at the unexpected sound. Unable to resist, she joins in his laughter, her giggles spilling freely into the air. Without thinking, she lean against him, her head resting on his shoulder as her hand touches his bicep. Jongho's heart skips a beat at her touch.
“Soojin has 2 bias wreckers - Mingi and Hongjoong. She likes rappers.” Luna states
“And her main bias?” San asks eagerly, his expression hopeful as Luna sits up straight again
Luna allows the anticipation to build up as all three men wait in bated breath before announcing, “You, San!” The kitchen erupts into chaos as a jubilant San bounces around the kitchen island while the others burst into laughter.
“Now you just have to figure out which twin is Soojin when you meet them!” Jongho jokes
San's eyes widen. "I never thought of that! Maybe I'll just call out her name and she’ll come over."
“Oh my god, San! They aren't dogs!” Seonghwa scolds gently.
“No, that actually is how most people tell them apart! Just say their name and whoever answers it is 9 times out of 10 the right one.” Luna says
“And the other 1 time?” San asks
“They're probably pretending to be each other to confuse people who don’t know them well enough!” Luna laughs. “They love tricks like that.”
“Sounds like fun!” Seonghwa chuckles warmly.
“If they try it when you meet them, I'll give you a heads up,” Luna promises.
“Unless they play with Wooyoung! That would be fun to watch.” Jongho grins
“Oh you are evil….” Luna says turning to face him, “I like it!” she adds with an evil grin of her own
"Well, I should double check I have everything before we get picked up," San announces, leaning over to plant an affectionate kiss on Luna’s lips, his hand cupping her cheek softly
“I should probably do the same.” Seonghwa pitches in.
“Thanks again for your help.” she says to him
“It was my pleasure,” he smiles, giving her a peck on the cheek before leaving the kitchen.
A quietness falls in the kitchen as Jongho and Luna are left alone. A stark contrast to the laughter that rang out of it minutes before. As Luna rifles through her backpack, Jongho wracks his brain, trying to find something to talk to her about.
Luna's voice cuts through the stillness, making Jongho jump in surprise. “Jongho,” she says, her eyes locking onto his. “Bear witness as I place my passport…” She dramatically reveals the navy-covered document, “…into my bag's inner pocket.”
Jongho laughs lightly at her actions and nods. “I am your witness!” He observes as she carefully stows away her passport before sealing the main compartment of her bag. He notices the ‘United States of America’ emblazoned on the front cover, reminding him that despite being Korean, she is classed as an American citizen.
“I always need a witness that sees me put my passport in my bag! After the Japan incident I require it!” she giggles
“The Japan incident?” he asked curiously
Luna explains how she had left her passport in her dorm room before a trip to Japan with friends, only realising it at the check in desk. While they went on without her, she caught a flight the next day. "It's become an inside joke that my friends confirm I've packed my passport and cheer when I take it out at check-in. So I always get a witness now, more for my own peace of mind."
“I can be your passport witness from now on,” Jongho offers with a warm smile.
“You are now my official passport supervisor!” Luna giggles in response, playfully nudging him with her shoulder. “I hope you take this responsibility serious!”
"I swear to fulfil my duties as Official Passport Supervisor with utmost diligence!" Jongho proclaims, saluting jokingly.
“You are so silly!” she says, her nose scrunching cutely as she smiles at him, her hand cupping his cheek briefly
Their laughter fades into a comfortable silence. Jongho wants to spend more time with her one on one, to share more laughs like that and hear more of her stories. Gathering his courage, he clears his throat, drawing her attention back to him.
"Hey, uh, Luna?" he starts, rubbing the back of his neck. "Would you maybe want to get coffee or something when we're in LA?"
Luna's eyes widen slightly in surprise, but a soft smile forms on her lips. “Of course, I'd love that, Jongho!”
Jongho feels a rush of relief as Luna's response registers in his mind. He clears his throat once again, trying to sound casual. “C-cool, I know this fantastic little cafe not too far from where we'll be staying. We’ve been there a few times and it has really nice food.”
"Perfect," she says, excitement lacing her voice. "I was hoping we could spend more time together, just us." She adds softly.
Jongho blinks in surprise at her confession. “Really?”
“Absolutely,” Luna confirms with a light giggle. "I wanted to give you space, but honestly? I worried you thought I didn't care and I was scared that I'd chosen the wrong approach."
“I had no idea,” Jongho murmurs as he feels a slight flutter in his stomach at her words.
“I know being affectionate isn’t your thing and that is okay. We go at your pace. But…” Luna locks eyes with him as one of her hands reaches over to hold his. “…I do want you to know that I like you a lot and I care about you a great deal.”
Luna's words hang in the air, a sweet confession that leaves Jongho feeling lighter than he has in a while. His past experiences with women were fleeting and unfulfilling, as most of them only wanted to be with an idol for a night or two before moving on, leaving him feeling like he wasn’t good enough for anyone. With Luna he wants to openly express his feelings for her, maybe not as boldly as Wooyoung does, but without holding back from affectionate gestures like hugs, holding hands and kisses in private.
“I care about you too.” he confesses squeezing her hand.
As their eyes meet, Jongho feels a surge of confidence coursing through him. He leans forward, the warmth of her body drawing him in, and he can almost taste the sweetness of her lips. But a sudden sound of footsteps echoing down the hallway causes him to pull back, his heart sinking with disappointment. This is the second time he has mustered up the courage to kiss her in the kitchen, only to have it interrupted by someone else's presence. Jongho can’t help but feel disappointed and a little embarrassed too but Luna gives his hand a squeeze and whispers, “It is okay.” but leaning back in her seat.
“Hongjoong says Myeonjin and Ilsung are picking us up in 30 minutes but he wants to talk to all of us in the lounge before we leave for the company.” Yunho says walking into the kitchen
“Is something wrong?” Jongho asks
“No, he just wants to go through the airport process for Luna so everything goes smoothly.” he answers as Jongho stands up from his seat.
A flurry of butterflies erupt in her stomach as he places his hand onto the small of her back, guiding her up from her seat pulling the chair back as she stands up too and tucks it neatly under the table with precision.
“Thank you.” she smiles at him, he gives her a shy smile in return and a small nod before following Yunho into the lounge.
In the lounge, Yunho sits beside Luna, enveloping her in his arms. He kisses her tenderly, the back of his fingers grazing her cheek then nuzzles into her neck. Jongho watches, waiting for the usual pang of jealousy to hit him. But it doesn’t come, all he feels is a calm acceptance, knowing Luna shares the same feelings as him now and that whenever they get to have their first kiss, he knows it will be perfect.
Slowly the others start coming into the lounge and sit down on the sofa with Hongjoong being the last one to come in.
“Thanks for coming down before we left, I wanted to go over the airport procedure so Luna knows what will happen.” his voice in captain mode
Wooyoung nods in agreement. “That is actually a good idea.”
Hongjoong explains that they will be going to the company first so the stylists can get them ready for the airport walk. 2 of the other managers Sunghoon and Hajoon will be picking up all their suitcases from the apartment too. When it is time to leave for the airport Luna will be travelling in a separate car with Ilsung.
“You’ll be checking in ahead of us with Ilsung, he already has your flight paperwork so all you’ll need is your passport and bag.” he says
“I’ve already got it in my bag and Jongho saw me put it in!” she says as Jongho nods with a small laugh as he remembers the official passport supervisor conversation. “Also you should know, it sometimes takes me longer at check-in and security when we land. My passport causes issues when I travel. But I don't want to delay you guys or Ilsung, so maybe I am best checking in after you.”
“Absolutely not.” Hongjoong shakes his head firmly, “We won’t go in until we know you’re through safely.”
"Why does your passport cause problems?" Mingi's eyebrows draw together in confusion.
“It is a US passport.” she answers
“Ooh, right.” Mingi says, “Sorry, I keep forgetting you are an American citizen.” he adds rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, which makes Jongho feel better at forgetting too. From the looks on all their faces at this moment Luna guessed they all did.
"Don’t you qualify for a dual citizenship though?" San asks. "Since your parents are Korean?"
Luna shakes her head. "No. The only way I could get it is if my dad was a Korean citizen when I was born. Both my parents were born in America, so not even they can get it." She shrugs, nonchalance masking her frustration. "I've never been denied travel but they do inspect my documents more, like they're forged."
“Ilsung will stay with you the whole time.” Yunho reassures her, “We are arriving early so there is plenty of time if you get held up.”
“And we will be together again in the private lounge.” Yeosang smiles at her
“The lounge we go to is just for idols. Total privacy until boarding.” Wooyoung adds
"People follow us to the plane though. Filming and trying to get close." Jongho says. "Some are even on our flight."
"So you'll board ahead of us, to avoid the chaos." Hongjoong gives her a meaningful look.
“In business class, we won't have complete privacy with the managers present. However, they usually fall asleep within an hour of the flight so we can relax a bit while they rest.” Wooyoung explains
As far as Luna was aware only Myeonjin knew of their relationship. She had a feeling Ilsung was starting to figure it out, or at the very least thinks her and Wooyoung are involved as he had walked in on them play fighting in the practice room the other day. Wooyoung had Luna pinned to the sofa, playfully biting her cheeks as she laughed and tried to break free. They quickly separated when Ilsung walked in but everyone knew he had seen them.
“We don’t need to worry about anyone else in that section, it will be just us and the managers,” Mingi adds.
Luna nods, “Got it, no PDA on the flight!”
Yunho loops an arm around her waist. "Disembarking is coach first, then us. But you can stay with us through customs to the VIP area. Once you are cleared, Ilsung will take you to the cars ahead of us."
Luna focuses intently, absorbing every detail to avoid causing them any worry about her.
“What about the hotel situation?” she asks nervously, her teeth gently bites her lower lip.
“How do you mean?” Yeosang tilts his head
“Will I be separated from you all?” There is a soft uncertainty in her voice that Yunho notices immediately.
“Never,” he reassures her, kissing the side of her head. “Our rooms are always close, as will yours. You won’t be separated from us at all.”
"I don't like being alone anymore..." She says quietly, but they hear the slight quiver in her voice.
“You won’t have to, sunshine,” San promises from beside her, holding her hand. “You can stay with any of us, or we'll come to you. Whatever you want.”
Jongho briefly looks down, wondering if she'd want to come to him in LA. Admittedly he liked the thought of it, having her to himself for a few hours.
“It will be so strange being away from the safety and privacy of the apartment." she says looking around at them all, “I know we are all going to be so busy while in LA but I’ll miss our morning and evening routines.”
Mingi nods in agreement. “We will make sure that our precious time together isn’t lost.”
“I don’t want to disrupt your routines,” she protests gently.
Wooyoung quirks a smile at her. “You really think we won’t want to see you every morning or evening? We want you a part of everything.”
“We will make new routines for when we are away for work.” Seonghwa says
“Any other questions Luna?” Hongjoong asks
“No, you’ve covered everything I was wanting to know.” she replies
“Are you okay with the plans?” Yunho asks, his arm around her waist holding her a little closer to his side for reassurance. He can feel there is something she is holding back, the little telltale sign he has learned is her fingers twitch.
“Of course, I'm just worried of how to act around the managers. I don’t want to look overly familiar or unprofessional,” she says as she places her arms around Yunhos shoulders.
“They know we’re all friends now. Just be yourself.” San answers
“Just treat it like a long day at the company building.” Yeosang suggests, “Just be how you normally are with us at work, don’t try to overthink or worry about it.”
“And once we get to the hotel in LA, we can drop all pretences and be ourselves again – just like home,” Yunho adds, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek.
Luna smiles at them all, “Okay, I feel better now.”
"Good." Hongjoong checks his phone. "Cars will be here any minute. Final checks, everyone."
Within fifteen minutes, the group are en route to the company building, navigating the city's vibrant streets. The chaos that greets them upon arrival was characteristic of their industry—stylists and hairdressers darting everywhere with focused expressions. In the midst of this chaos, Luna keeps herself out the way by sitting on the sofa in the corner of the room, engrossed in texting her mom.
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The sound of Chaeyoung's annoying laugh cuts through the air, drawing Luna's attention away from the screen. With an annoying grin, Chaeyoung playfully styles Hongjoongs hair, her touch lingering on his shoulder as they share a laugh together. Luna feels a surge of jealousy and frustration, the burning sensation intensifying as she bites her tongue to hold back her emotions.
"Chaeyoung is unbearable," Hyunsik mutters, dropping onto the sofa beside Luna. His blunt statement echoes her unspoken thoughts. "That inane cackling actually gives me a headache."
Luna simply hums, eyes narrowing on Chaeyoung. Her hands continue toying with Hongjoongs newly dyed brown hair, now drifting down to graze his nape then rest on his shoulders again.
"She thinks he's actually interested in her too," Hyunsik scoffs with an eye roll.
“She does?” Lunas head snaps towards him
"Yeah, no chance though. Hongjoong's just being nice." Hyunsik leans in, lowering his voice. "I heard Chaeyoung tried seducing Yunho once."
The news sparks fresh envy within Luna. Possessiveness over boyfriends was unfamiliar territory. "Is that true?" She asks, trying to keep her voice steady and unbothered
Hyunsik nods knowingly. “Yeah, Chaeyoung used to be his main hairstylist until Jiyeon took over. Rumour has it that she tried to kiss him, and he requested Jiyeon afterwards. Hajoon told me and he has been with the guys the second longest after Myeonjin so I trust his word on this.”
Resentment simmers as Luna pictures Chaeyoung's lips on Yunho’s. She glances his way, watching Jiyeon style his hair professionally. A stark contrast to Chaeyoungs giggling and touching.
Hyunsik's phone buzzes, jolting Luna from her thoughts. "Gotta go check on the cars," he says, rising from the sofa. "See you when we get to LA!"
As Hyunsik leaves, Myeonjin approaches her. “Hongjoong briefed you on the airport procedure, right?” Luna nods, “Any questions?”
Luna shakes her head. "I just want the guys to get through smoothly too."
He smiles reassuringly. “They will. We'll look after them.” Glancing around the room, he adds, “I better finalise passports and departure details.”
Luna smiles as he walks away. At least it wasn’t just her who had passports on the brain. Anxiety hits, prompting her to double-check for her own. She relaxes once more when she sees it still inside the inner pocket of her backpack. Glancing back up she catches Mingis gaze from across the room. He gives her a playful wink, the tip of his tongue sticking out the corner his smirk—the same look he had given her the night before in his room on his desk chair. One hand on her hips guiding her movements on top of him, the other wrapped around her hair. Heat rushes to her cheeks at the memory and she quickly looks away from him.
Myeonjin announces that the cars are ready and it was a 10 minute warning. The room erupts into a flurry of further activity than before as they prepared to leave. Luna feels her heart beat a little faster as she stands up and grabs her backpack. The stylists swarm around the guys, putting the finishing touches on their outfits and coiffures. Hongjoongs eyes are fixated on her as she looks around the room.
“Ready?" Ilsung appears at her side.
She nods, throat tight.
“We’re leaving first, so let’s head to the garage now.” He glanced around. “Best to avoid the stylists—they take their work seriously! I’ve had one too many elbows to the ribs.” His humour elicits a timid laugh from her
Luna puts her backpack over her shoulders, she gives the guys a final look as people surround them, each of them too busy with what is going around them to see her. She wishes she could speak to one of them or get a reassuring hug but there is too many people around and a moment alone is impossible right now.
Reluctantly she leaves the room but Hongjoongs eyes are still fixed on her. Noticing the worry etched on her face and the nervous rubbing of her arm through her hoodie sleeve, a heaviness settles in his chest.
"One minute," he tells the stylist fixing his shirt, ignoring her exasperated sigh as he hastily exits.
At the end of the hall, he spots Luna and Ilsung about to disappear through a door.
“Luna, hold on!” he calls out, jogging down the hallway.
“Everything okay?” Ilsung asks
“Yes, just need to have a quick chat with Luna,” Hongjoong replies, stopping in front of her. “It will only be a few moments, I promise!” he looks at Ilsung
“I’ll meet you downstairs, Luna” Ilsung says before walking away
Hongjoong quickly scans both ends of the hallway before wrapping his fingers around Luna's hand. He guides her into an empty vocal practice room, the door clicking shut behind them.
“Joongie…” Luna begins, but her words are silenced with a deep kiss. After the initial shock wanes, she melts into him, her arms finding their way around his shoulders. They lean into each other, cherishing this rare moment of intimacy and escape from the chaos happening in the other room.
"What was that for?" Luna asks, slightly breathless when they finally part.
“I needed to steal a moment with you before you left,” he admits with a gentle smile, hands on either side of her neck, his thumbs brush against her flushed cheeks. “How are you doing?” his voice is soft
"Nervous about the airport," she admits, eyes downcast.
“It’ll just be for a short while then we will all be together again.” he replies
“I just want you guys to get through it safely,” she murmurs. Her fingers fiddle with the front of his denim shirt, smoothing the material down in an attempt to distract herself too. Hongjoong can see the nerves in her face causing him to lean down and kiss her softly.
“We've done this countless times. We know the drill and how chaotic it can get. So don’t worry about us, just focus on yourself until we regroup in the lounge area.” he says, “Did you pack your bipolar medication for the flight?” he adds
“I did and I have my legal paperwork for it all too.” she confirms with a nod
“Good. I have set a reminder on my phone for your dosage during the flight.” He watches her closely, gauging her reaction. “I hope that's not overstepping.”
“Oh Joongie..” she breaks into a smile. She leans in close to him, planting a tender kiss on his lips before pulling away with a content sigh. "You are so incredibly thoughtful," she murmurs, her eyes shining with affection,
“I wasn’t sure if you need to take it at the same time every day so I wanted to be safe.” he says
“I can adjust the times I take them but it is really thoughtful of you to think of that. If I am asleep just wake me up and when we get to LA I’ll adjust the timing for the next dose.” she smiles up at him “We should go now – Ilsung's waiting for me and your stylist is probably seething.”
“Honestly? I couldn't care less if they're angry,” he grins at her. “A stolen kiss with you is always worth it.”
“Not if I mess up your make up for the airport photos!” she replies raising an eyebrow
“I am wearing a face mask anyway so who cares!” he replies making her laugh “I’ll see you at the lounge.” he adds running his fingers through her long black hair
Luna nods and lets go of him. She quickly removes traces of her tinted lip balm from his lips as he grins down at her. He opens the door and checks the hallway before opening it further to let her out.
"See you soon," she whispers. He squeezes her hand, brushing his lips against her cheek while the hallway was still empty
“You will.” he smiles at her before watching as she disappears from view. He takes a deep breath before walking back to the room to see everyone was ready. The stylist quickly pulls him to the side and goes to readjust his shirt.
“It is fine.” he says not wanting her to move it from how Luna fixed it
“Right, time to go now!” Myeonjin shouts over the noise.
��Was Luna okay?” Yunho asks Hongjoong quietly
“I think so, bit of anxiety but I think if we keep an eye on her she’ll be okay.” he replies as they make their way downstairs to the cars
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Luna's pulse quickens as the car nears the airport. As it slows to a stop she sees the swarm of cameras and fans gathered at the entrance, their sheer number knotting her stomach with anxiety. Glancing back, she spots the other cars trailing behind. How she wishes to be with them now, their presence is always like a soothing balm for her nerves.
"Ready?" Ilsung's calm voice draws her attention back.
She meets his steady gaze and nods, swallowing her nerves.
"It's intimidating, I know," he acknowledges, eyeing the crowd. "But they won’t bother us. Look, other people are walking right by."
Indeed, travellers stride past the spectacle unaffected, sparing barely a glance.
"I'll stay with you. Once we're checked in, it's security, then the lounge. The guys will join after." His gentle tone puts her at ease. "Don't worry." A smile creases his eyes.
The warmth of his words begins to loosen the nervous knot in her chest. "Let's go."
Ilsung opens the door and quickly runs around to open Lunas but she is already out of the car by the time he makes it. He closes the door for her and they make their way towards the crosswalk. As they stop for a bus passing Luna glances over at the 2 cars parked at the side of the road, hoping that they are okay but also that they aren’t worrying about her. She wants them to focus on their own safety through the crowds waiting for them.
Hongjoong watches Luna exit the car, tracking her every movement. His pulse jumps when she glances back. Though her expressions are obscured behind glasses and a face mask, tension radiates from her taut frame and wide eyes.
"She looks anxious," Seonghwa observes quietly.
"I know," Yunho agrees, his gaze also locked on Luna.
"We'll be with her soon enough," San says lightly, oblivious to their heightened concern.
“Shit.” Hongjoong grits his teeth as Luna rubs at her arm. It was taking everything inside of him to stay inside the car, and not jump out and go to her.
The bus rumbles past and they cross to the terminal. Weaving through the crowd with ease, they reach the check-in desk unnoticed. After handing over documents and receiving boarding passes, pleasantries are exchanged and they head onward.
"Next stop, security," Ilsung says, guiding Luna toward the queues. "You'll like the food in the lounge. I swear they have the biggest, tastiest burgers."
His casual banter lifts her mood and also the prospect of a hearty meal after only consuming some strawberries, a banana and a protein shake this morning. "I could definitely go for a massive burger right now!" she replies, tension melting away
Once they have both gone through the gate into the security area Luna hears screams in the distance and she knows that the guys are coming.
“This way.” Ilsung guides her through a separate business class security queue.
It only takes 5 minutes for them to go through and have their carry on bags checked. Luna keeps looking behind her waiting to see the guys but all she can hear is people shouting their names in the distance. Ilsung takes her to the private lounge. It is a medium sized room filled with plush sofas and armchairs, a large TV hanging on the wall that was playing some kdrama Luna didn’t recognise. There was a large window that faced onto the runway and she could see a plane thundering down it before launching into the air. There was a table against a wall that was filled with drinks and snacks.
"Make yourself comfortable. I'll grab the burgers," Ilsung says before slipping out.
Alone, Luna's excitement wars with anxiety. A lifelong nervous flyer and worry for the guys lingers too. She hopes they pass through security safely.
Ilsung returns with two towering burgers. At Luna's wide-eyed reaction, he chuckles.
“Wow!” Luna laughs as she sees them, “You really weren’t exaggerating about the size of them!”
“I know!” he replies chuckling and hands one plate to Luna, “The food lounge is next door so help yourself. The guys will be here really soon.”
“You aren’t staying in here?” she asks looking at him
“The managers and I like to give the guys complete privacy here, it is one of the rare places they can get it. If you need anything then we are just next door though but just relax and enjoy your food.” he smiles at her before leaving the room
Luna takes a bite of the burger and lets out a satisfying hum at how good it tastes. Another thing Ilsung did not exaggerate was how tasty it was. She savours each bite as she watches the planes outside take off and land while also looking over at the entrance to the lounge for the guys to arrive.
The lounge door finally swings open and a cacophony of familiar voices flood the room. Luna's heart leaps as she abandons her half-eaten burger on the coffee table and springs to her feet.
"There she is!" San's cheerful voice rings out above the chatter.
“Already eating food, that is what I like to see!” Yunho grins as Luna's mouth curves into a smile around the remnants of her latest bite. She chews hastily as she covers her mouth and swallows.
She doesn’t know who to go to first as she has the overwhelming urge to hug each of them but Hongjoong is the first one in front of her. Cradling her face, he searches her eyes. "Are you okay?"
Luna nods, holding his unsettled gaze. "I am."
“Are you sure?” he asks, his eyes filled with concern
"Joongie, I am fine!" she assures him, offering a small smile.
“Thank god.” he breathes, pulling her close.
His lips find hers in a kiss both tender and urgent, conveying all the things he cannot put into words. The others look on, surprised by this rare display of vulnerability from their composed leader. Apart from the hug Seonghwa witnessed the other night, none of them have seen him show any physical affection to Luna, or to any woman in the entire time they’ve known him.
In this unguarded moment, his usual stoic demeanour melts away, revealing a glimpse of the vulnerable person beneath. The guys exchange glances, unsure of how to react to this unexpected show of emotion from their typically reserved friend. But in that moment, they see him as he truly is – someone who cares deeply and fiercely but keeps it hidden behind a facade of strength and composure. As he pulls away from the kiss, he buries his head into her neck, his arms wrapping tightly around her body as she reciprocates.
“I’ll come get you guys when it is time to board.” Myeonjins voice quietly says from behind them
“Thanks.” Yeosang says before Myeonjin leaves.
Hongjoong holds Luna for a few more moments before releasing her, allowing the others to greet her as well. Their eagerness to reunite with Luna is palpable.
As Luna makes her way towards the group, each member takes turns embracing her in warm, heartfelt hugs. San engulfs her in a bear hug, his laughter resonating through the air. Wooyoung spins her around playfully, a mischievous grin on his face as she lets out the now signature laughing scream she does when he hugs her like this which is multiple times a day! Mingi ruffles her hair affectionately before kissing her forehead, his tall frame towering over her.
Seonghwa cradles her face in both hands, his thumbs tracing her cheeks. "I'm happy we're all back together," he murmurs, before claiming her lips in a lingering kiss.
“So am I.” she replies before Yunho steps forward and finally Yeosang. After she’s hugged them all, she shares a silent exchange at Jongho. Happy to see him as well but holding back from hugging him. Despite their little confessions and the near kiss in the kitchen earlier, she still wanted to make sure things were on his terms. His own arms were itching to hug her too and if they were alone he absolutely would be doing exactly that.
“Since we have a couple of hours before our flight, lets grab some food and relax.” Yunho suggests
San leans closer to Luna, sporting a kind smile. "Do you want another one?" He gestures towards her nearly finished burger, seeking her approval before getting more food.
Luna chuckles softly at San's offer and nods appreciatively. "I could definitely go for one more," she replies.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
After they have all ate, they look at their seat numbers on their assigned boarding passes, Luna has a window seat with Yeosang sitting beside her. Hongjoong, Mingi and Wooyoung in the middle seats with San and Yunho on the other side of row. Seonghwa and Jongho were in the seats directly behind Luna and Yeosang.
“I can’t wait to sit beside you on the plane. Have some time with just you.” Yeosang smiles at her as they cuddle on one of the sofas, lost in a little bubble. The tip of his nose touching hers, as he gazes into her eyes affectionately. “I feel like I haven’t see you in so long.”
“Are you prepared for putting up with me for 11 hours though?” she giggles back, her fingers playing with the ends of his hair
“You say that like its a hardship.” he replies
“Wait until my snoring starts!” she grins back at him
“Hey, I’ve shared a room with the sleep talker since we were 17! Your snoring doesn’t bother me one bit!” he says, his lips brushing against hers, teasing her
Luna leans in to plant a firm kiss on his lips causing him to laugh and kiss her back. Yeosang brushes a strand of hair behind her ear, his fingers tracing her jawline before resting gently on her cheek as he continues to kiss her softly.
At that moment Myeonjin comes in to say they will be boarding in a few minutes. They all get their things together and Luna leaves the private lounge first with Ilsung. Like they said, there were people waiting around the lounge areas, phones at the ready waiting for the guys to leave.
"If only they'd give them space," Luna grumbles, frowning at the spectacle.
"Unfortunately it's part of being an idol. We protect them as much as we can, but in public places like this, we can't control where people go," Ilsung explains as they reach the gate.
He hands over their boarding passes and passports. The attendant scrutinises Luna's documents, holding up her passport to compare the photo to her face. Eventually she passes them back over and lets them board.
As they walk onto the plane and into the business class lounge Luna cannot help but look around it with her mouth open. She had only ever travelled in economy and had been looking forward to this when they told her she was travelling with them. The space was more expansive than expected, with two rows of enormous, plush seats. It felt remarkably private.
She takes her seat and looking around it, pressing the multiple buttons as she waits for the others. They soon arrive, get settled down and it isn’t long before the plane door clunks heavily as it seals shut.
Luna's chest suddenly tightens, her breath coming in gasps as regret floods through her for not taking her anxiety meds earlier. Fumbling in her backpack, she searches frantically, pulse racing.
"You okay?" Yeosang's deep voice cuts through the noise.
Meeting his steady gaze, her heart racing and a cold sweat forming on her forehead. Luna shakes her head, words failing her.
Yeosang's eyes widen. "Wait, are you having a reaction?"
"What?" Hongjoong's concerned voice drifts over from the aisle seat across from Yeosang.
“Shit, we need her pen thing!” Wooyoung says sitting forward in his seat
"No… reaction...just anxiety!" Luna manages between shuddering breaths pulling out the medication bottle from her bag. “J-just.. need my… pills.”
“Oh thank god!” Hongjoong sighs in relief as Yeosangs body relaxes too
"Is it flying?" Yeosang asks gently.
Luna's trembling hands close around the pill bottle. "The actual flying is fine." She gulps. "Not… too good at the takeoff and landing part." She struggles to open the childproof cap, hating how weak she feels. “Fuck!” she mutters in English
"Let me." Yeosang takes the bottle from Luna's shaking hands and opens it effortlessly. "How many do you need?"
“T-two pills.” she says to him
In the row behind them, Seonghwa leans forward, alerted by the tremor in Luna's voice. Wordlessly, he passes a bottle of water to Yeosang over the seat. Luna gulps the pills down, the cool water soothing her parched throat. Closing her eyes, she leans back, trying to slow her frenzied thoughts as her feet taps rapidly on the floor.
Grasping her hand, Yeosang asks, "What can we do?"
Luna shakes her head helplessly, reaching for the amethyst crystal in her jean pocket, grasping it painfully in her palm.
“It is okay,” Hongjoong says trying to ease her distress.
Around them, the others are noticing something is wrong. From beside Seonghwa, Jongho's brows knit together in concern. "Luna, what do you need?"
“Yu-yun-ho,” Luna chokes, tears beginning to well up behind her eyes.
“Yunho, Luna needs….” Before Hongjoong can finish, Yunho has already unbuckled his seat belt and is clambering over the middle seats to get to her side.
“I’m here, little one.” Yunho says softly, crouching down in front of her seat and resting his hands on her knees. “What can I do?”
Luna shakes her head helplessly. She doesn’t even know what can help her. All she knows is she needs him.
“It's okay. You’re safe.” Yunho soothes, his voice low and reassuring.
Hongjoong speaks up from his seat nearby as he notices the flight attendants preparing for the safety briefing, “Yeosang, you take Yunho's seat and let him sit beside Luna during takeoff. We can rearrange seats once we're in the air.”
Yeosang reluctantly nods, casting a final worried glance at Luna before moving to take Yunho's seat.
“What’s going on? Is Luna okay?” San asks, concern etched on his face as Yeosang settles into his newly assigned seat.
“Panic attack, I think. She said she gets anxious during takeoff and landing,” Yeosang answers softly, his gaze flickering back to Luna with worry.
Amidst the chaos in Luna's mind, Yunho's soothing voice cuts through like a ray of light. "You're safe," Her watery eyes slowly open to meet his reassuring gaze. "You're not alone in this. We're all here for you."
Tears spill down Luna's cheeks, her emotions overwhelming her fragile body. "I know," she whispers, bowing her head to hide her tears from the others as they all exchange worried looks, feeling powerless to help her in her distress.
Gently, Yunho brushes away her tears. "Breathe with me, okay? In and out, slowly," he coaches.
As Luna's breathing begins to steady out, her death grip on the amethyst crystal loosens slightly. "Thank you," she whispers.
Yunho just smiles. "No thanks needed, little one."
A low rumble fills the cabin as the plane begins slowly backing up. Luna's head jerks up, eyes wide with renewed panic. Yunho squeezes her hand reassuringly. "Just the plane backing out."
“Sorry!” Luna sniffles, embarrassed by her sudden display of fear. "I'll be fine once we're in the air."
“You do not need to apologise for anything. I still get anxious sometimes too.” he smiles at her
The rumbling grows louder as the plane taxis into position. Luna grips Yunho’s hand tightly, the amethyst crystal cutting into her palm once again. She closes her eyes, focusing on his steady presence.
"In and out," Yunho reminds her softly. "You're doing great."
Luna nods as she follows Yunho's lead, copying his breathing. As the plane begins to accelerate down the runway the roar of the engines fills the cabin, making her tense up even more. She feels Yunhos hand tighten around hers, grounding her. She turns to face him. “You are doing so well.”
Luna nods, her fingers interlocking tightly with Yunho's. She repeats his earlier words in her mind, focusing on each syllable as the wheels leave the runway.
In and out. In and out.
The rush of adrenaline fills her veins as the plane ascends into the air. But Yunho's warm hand on hers steadies her nerves. She takes a deep breath, trying to relax into her seat.
Yunho leans closer to Luna, his voice barely above a whisper. "Look out the window, little one." he urges gently.
"Outside?" she questions, her gaze shifting to him. Her eyes wide.
He smiles reassuringly. "Trust me."
Luna follows his gaze and gasps at the breathtaking sight before her eyes. The sun is descending on the horizon, its departure marking the canvas of the sky with shades of orange and pink.
"Wow," Luna gasps, awestruck. “It’s beautiful!”
"So are you, Luna," Yunho responds.
Luna blushes at Yunho's compliment, feeling her cheeks warm. She turns her attention back to the sunset, captivated by its beauty. The colours blend across the sky, casting a warm glow over everything below creating a sense of calm within her. Yunho watches Luna with a tender smile, his eyes reflecting the awe mirrored in hers.
As the plane smoothly ascends to cruising height, Luna feels the heavy weight on her chest lift. The seatbelt sign turns off, and she takes a deep breath, finally feeling some relief.
"Feeling better?" Yunho inquires gently.
Luna nods, turning to look at him. She notices Hongjoong, Mingi, Wooyoung, San, and Yeosang all trying to appear busy, but she can tell they had been watching her closely during the flight. A wave of guilt washes over her for causing them worry. Yunho senses this and gives her hand a comforting squeeze but Luna withdraws abruptly, suddenly realising she had been clutching his hand the entire time.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to…" she stammers.
Yunho smiles, cutting her off. "It's fine." He tucks a stray strand of Luna's hair behind her ear before cupping her cheek.
"Yunho," she whispers, casting a wary glance towards their senior managers, Myeonjin, Ilsung, Hajoon and Sunghoon seated at the other side of the plane.
"Do you think they're my concern now?" His tone is resolute. "You are my priority."
“I just don’t want to get you into trouble.” she says quietly
“You won’t.” he replies gently
Luna sighs, knowing there is no point in trying to argue with him. “Thank you.” She reaches back into her pocket and pulls out the amethyst crystal. “You helped in more ways than one!”
Yunho chuckles lightly at the sight of the crystal. "So that's why you had your hand in your pocket."
“I don’t go anywhere without this in my pocket now.” she replies looking at it fondly
"I'm glad it helps." Yunho says quietly. He leans in closer and whispers, "If I could kiss you right now, I would."
"Yun!" She giggles and playfully shoves his shoulder as he settles back into his seat.
"There's the laugh I love!" Mingi chimes from his seat, causing them both to turn around. "Feeling better?"
"Yes, and I apologise for causing such a commotion," Luna replies looking behind her, ensuring Seonghwa and Jongho are included in the conversation.
"No need to apologise," Wooyoung interjects.
“How are you feeling now?” Hongjoong asks
“I am okay now. I have a bit of anxiety during take off and landing. I usually take some medication to help settle my nerves but I thought I would be okay this time so I didn’t take it.” she says, “And before anyone says it, I know that was stupid!”
“Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself, sunsh… Luna!” San catches himself before using her nickname. “Anxiety like that is pretty common but we will always be there to help you through it.”
"I'll take my medication before we land so this doesn't happen again, I promise." Luna assures them with a small smile forming on her pale face. "I'm sorry though."
Seonghwa standing up from his seat, offering a comforting smile. "Don't worry about it, Luna. We're just glad you're feeling better now."
Jongho's voice is gentle as he suggests, "They'll be serving dinner soon. You should eat and get some rest."
Luna nods, exhausted from the emotional outburst she just had. "That sounds like a good idea," she agrees, mustering a faint smile. “I am just going to head to the bathroom to sort my face!” she adds knowing that she must look awful right now
Yunho stands up to let Luna out of their row and watches her make her way to the bathroom. As she disappears from view, he sinks back into his seat with a heavy sigh.
"That was rough," Wooyoung comments, concern etched in his features.
Hongjoong reaches over the aisle and places a comforting hand on Yunho's shoulder. "You did a great job keeping her calm."
Yunho runs a hand through his hair, feeling drained. "I hope so."
San can't help but feel guilty. "I didn't even think to ask her how she was with flying."
“To be honest, I just assumed because of all the travelling she did as a child she was an expert at flying.” Mingi speaks up, sounding remorseful
"Well, we know now and we can support her better in the future," Hongjoong states with a heavy sigh.
“Lets not make a big deal of it when she comes back though.” Seonghwa says as they all nod in agreement
Meanwhile, in the bathroom, Luna splashes cool water on her puffy face and takes deep breaths. The panic has passed, but exhaustion weighs heavily on her shoulders now. She looks at her reflection in the mirror and whispers to herself, "You fucking idiot, Luna."
When she returns to her seat, she finds Yeosang is back beside her once more, with Yunho in his original seat at the other side of the row.
"We can switch if you'd prefer Yunho," Yeosang offers.
“Absolutely not!” she smiles as she sits back at her seat beside the window, “This is your assigned seat and remember what you said in the lounge, you have a whole flight of my snoring to look forward to.”
“I will let Yunho sit here for landing.” he replies
Luna shakes her head, "You don't have to do that. I only asked for Yunho's help because he knows about my anxiety and has helped me in the past. I didn't want it to turn into a full-blown panic attack in front of everyone." she explains, “However, you all saw it anyway. My therapist prescribed me anxiety medication for when things get too much.”
“I didn’t know you saw a therapist.” he says softly
“I get stressed a bit easily and have anxiety about things.” she replies, deciding to let him know about the basics for now.
He nods, his eyes filled with understanding. Luna notices how his gaze lingers on her for a moment longer, as if he wants to say something more but hesitates.
"I'm glad you're taking steps to take care of yourself," he finally says, his voice soft and sincere. "Anxiety can be tough to deal with, but it's great that you have support."
As the flight attendants begin serving dinner, Luna feels the full extent of her panic attack wash over her and the exhaustion hits her hard. She picks at her food, her appetite gone.
"You need to eat, angel." Yeosang says from beside her.
"I know. I'm just not hungry though." She pushes her tray away. "Eating two burgers plus a hot dog and ice cream at the airport wasn't wise." she adds poking her stomach
“How about I tell you a bad joke and if you laugh then you need to eat a couple of bites?” Yeosang says
Luna looks up at him and can't help but smile through her exhaustion. "Deal. Hit me with that bad joke."
Grinning mischievously, Yeosang asks, "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
“Oh my god!” Luna winces, “That is something my dad would say! However…. I will give you that one though!” she adds smiling widely. She picks up her chop sticks and eats a few bites of her grilled beef tenderloin.
"I've got plenty more if you need incentive," Yeosang replies with a wink.
"I'm sure you do. And I'm sure they'll work." She takes another bite. “I am a sucker for a bad joke!”
She eats a bit more of her food before admitting she really cannot fit anymore into her stomach. Yeosang takes her plates and neatly stacks them with his own as the flight attendants collect them. Luna lets out a long yawn and stretches her arms above her head.
“Your seat can flatten down a bit so its more like a bed.” he says, “If you want to go wash up and brush your teeth, I will set it up for you.”
“Thank you Sang-ie.” she smiles standing up, longing to give him a hug but keeps her hands to herself as she passes him by
As Luna heads towards the bathroom to freshen up, Yeosang gets to work on adjusting her seat into a more comfortable position.
“Did Luna eat enough?” Mingi asks him
As Yeosang finishes adjusting Luna's seat, he looks up and nods at Mingi's question. "She ate a decent amount, not as much as I’d have liked her to but I think she is tired and needs to sleep.”
“Anxiety is exhausting.” Mingi quietly nods, knowing himself how it can feel
“It's been a rough day for her," he replies softly placing the pillows and cover onto her seat
Just then, Luna returns from the bathroom looking refreshed. "Thank you so much, Yeosang. You didn't have to go through all this trouble for me," she says sincerely.
Yeosang shrugs off her thanks with a warm smile. "It's no trouble at all. I just want to make sure you're comfortable."
She settles down as Yeosang fixes his own seat, telling her if he is asleep and she needs to get past him, just wake him up or climb over him, which makes her laugh. Everyone around them has settled into their own makeshift beds, some watching movies through headphone, or reading books, or already asleep!
As the hum of the planes engines lulls them into a comfortable silence, Luna finds herself drifting off to sleep. Yeosang quietly covers her with another blanket and whispers, "Rest well, Luna. We're here if you need anything." In the dimly-lit cabin and with most people busy or sleeping, Yeosang take the opportunity to lean down and kiss her pouty lips.
The sudden touch of his lips on hers makes Luna's eyes flutter open slightly, surprised by the unexpected gesture. She gazes at Yeosang with a mix of confusion and affection.
Yeosang chuckles softly, "Sorry, couldn't resist. You just looked so peaceful and cute."
Blushing slightly, Luna smiles sleepily, reaching out to touch his face. "It's okay."
Yeosang leans back into his own seat as she closes her eyes again but he can’t take his eyes off her. Just as she starts to drift off again, Mingi's voice cuts through the quiet cabin, "Luna, if you need anything during the flight, don't hesitate to wake us up."
“I will.” she mumbles drowsily, as she succumbs to the sleep.
Yeosang continues to look at her, feeling a surge of protectiveness for her.
“You should sleep too Yeosang.” Hongjoong says quietly
“Do you think she’ll really be okay when its time to land?” he ask, turning to look at his leader
“I hope so.” he replies, “If she isn’t we will be there to support her though. It is all we can do.”
Just then, Luna stirs in her sleep, mumbling something unintelligible. Yeosang reaches out to adjust her blanket, tucking it more securely around her shoulders. Luna lets out a small whine, her brow furrowing as if troubled by a bad dream.
As the cabin lights dim further, Luna's troubled expressions fades away as she slips into a deep sleep, her breathing evens out replaced by her soft snores. Yeosang, reassured by her peaceful state, finally allows himself to close his eyes and rest.
The remainder of the flight went by without any issues. After everyone slept for a few hours, they had breakfast, Luna got a bit of work done on her laptop and then watched a movie with Yeosang. An hour before landing she took her medication and the process was easier than taking off. She closed her eyes and held onto the pillow from her seat.
Just as they said to her back in Korea there were some fans who were waiting for them at the leaving gate. Luna kept herself behind Yunho with Ilsung and one of the bodyguards on either side of her.
Like security at Incheon Airport, they got through customs very quickly and Luna was the first to leave. Ilsung escorted her to one of the cars waiting outside the airport. She didn’t know who would be getting inside it with her as it was dependant on who came out first and which car the managers sorted them in to.
10 minutes later she sees them coming. The car door opens with Hongjoong, Seonghwa, Mingi and Yeosang getting in and Yunho, San, Wooyoung and Jongho entering the car behind them.
“Everything go okay?” Seonghwa asks her
“Yeah, straight through with no issues.” she replies as the car begins to move
“Are you going for a nap when you get to your hotel room?” Yeosang asks
“No, I need to do some work.” she answers
Hongjoong frowns, worry creasing his forehead. "Seriously? You plan on diving into work right away?"
"I've got a conference meeting in like 2 hours," Luna says, pulling her phone from her pocket. "I got some work done on the flight but I need to finish it before the meeting."
"A meeting so soon after the flight?" Hongjoong's expression turns grave, his voice tinged with concern. "Who is it with?"
"Eden," Luna answers distractedly, focused on replying to a work email she had just received
Hongjoong's eyes widen in alarm. "No way, you're not working. Rest should be your priority after such a long flight!" He places a gentle but firm hand on her phone screen, lowering it from her face.
Luna's brows draw together in frustration and she pulls the phone back up. "But the album discussion for Japan can't be postponed!"
“No, I will call him.” Hongjoong fixes her with a serious look, “I'll make sure Eden understands that today is off-limits for work.” His voice leaves no room for argument.
“It is essential that it happens today.” Luna's determination remains unscathed. Her sharp tone echoes in the enclosed space.
A silence falls in the car as Hongjoong and Luna look at one another, neither one of them showing any signs of backing down. Mingi, Yeosang and Seonghwa look between themselves.
“Hongjoong has a point.” Seonghwa speaks softly, “You have just got off a very long flight. You need time to rest and adjust to the timezone.”
“I appreciate your concern, but this meeting can't be postponed,” Luna holds her ground.
Mingi chimes in softly, empathy dripping from his words, "We understand your dedication and work ethic, but princess, your health comes first. Let Hongjoong handle this."
Feeling the weight of their worries bearing down on her, Luna takes a deep breath before assertively saying, "I understand your concerns, but this meeting with Eden cannot wait any longer."
Hongjoong's frustration bubbles over at Luna's insistence on working despite everyone's advice, his voice rises slightly. "Luna, please listen to us. We only want what's best for you. Trust me to take care of this today. Your well-being surpasses any work obligation."
As Luna gazes at each of them, she senses their genuine care reflected in their expressions. Despite knowing the importance of the meeting, she was already feeling the fatigue from the past 18 hours catching up to her. "Fine, go ahead and reschedule it," she concedes, turning her head away from them to look out of the car window.
"Luna, I apologise if I seem forceful; my intention was only your well-being," Hongjoong says, feeling a little guilty at going into leader mode with Luna, something he never wanted to do with her.
"I know," Luna replies, meeting his apologetic gaze. "It's just, when it comes to work I take it very seriously."
"We know you work hard, sometimes too hard," Yeosang says.
“I don’t want to be a slacker or let anyone down.” Luna's words reflect her dedication and concern, “And I don’t want to piss off Eden either when I’ve been given such an important job.”
"No one could ever accuse you of being a slacker," Hongjoong reassures. "As for Eden, leave him to me. This was my decision, not yours. So if he wants to be angry at anyone, he can be angry at me."
Luna rubs her temples, feeling a headache begin. "I don't want him angry at anyone."
The car slows down and comes to a stop outside their hotel. The guys had told Luna earlier that another manager always goes ahead and checks in everyone so their room key cards were ready for them. No delays or waiting around, just straight to their rooms. It sounded like heaven to her, not having to deal with it all herself.
Exiting the car, Luna takes a deep breath, trying to shake off her exhaustion. She follows the guys into the hotel, her mind still on the postponed meeting. As they step into the brightly lit lobby, she sees the others are already here.
“How was the drive?” Wooyoung asks as she joins them
Luna sighs a little, “It was alright.”
“What’s wrong?” Yunho asks her
“We just had a little difference of opinion.” she says, running a hand through her hair. “I am sure it will be fine though.”
San furrows his brows, concern etching his face. “What happened?”
“I was supposed to be having a meeting with Eden in a couple of hours,” she replies, glancing over at Hongjoong who is talking on his phone, “Hongjoong made the decision that I wasn’t to do it so I could rest and I am worried Eden is going to be pissed off.”
Sans expression softens as he looks between Luna and Hongjoong. “You know how Eden gets about work but he’ll understand you’ve just had a 12 hour flight and need to adjust to the time zone. Hongjoong will handle it so don’t worry.”
As Hajoon distributes their keycards, relief washes over Luna. At least she didn't have to handle check-in after the long journey. The group shuffles toward the elevators, Luna trailing behind, muscles beginning to ache.
"We should all meet up for dinner later in my room," Hongjoong suggests as the doors slide shut. "It'll be more private."
“That sounds like a good idea.” San agrees
“What do you think Luna?” Mingi asks her
“Only if you guys don’t have any other plans.” she replies
"You are our plans," Wooyoung smiles, eliciting one from her too.
“What is your room number?” Yeosang asks her
"638," she answers, checking her card.
“Ooh, I am 636. Maybe you and I will have the adjoining door!” Mingi grins
“Unless I do, I am 640!” Yunho says
“That is not fair!” Wooyoung pouts. “I am 682!!”
Everyone begins to laugh as the lift doors slide open and they walk out.
“Luggage should be here in 2/3 hours.” Seonghwa says to Luna as they all walk down the corridor towards their assigned rooms, “If we are sleeping when they arrive the managers just put them in our rooms but we asked them not to do that for you, instead they will put it in one of our rooms for you. So you don’t need to worry about someone coming into your room.”
“Thanks, that sounds good. I’d probably freak out if that happened.” Luna laughs, “Here is my room!”
“Aww I am on the far away side.” Mingi says as he stands in front of his door
“At least you are nearby!” Wooyoung mumbles passing him, “I shall see you all from the other side!”
“My room in 4 hours!” Hongjoong says, “Everyone get a proper rest too!” he adds, more towards Luna than anyone else
After bidding everyone goodbye, Luna enters her room and collapses onto the plush, white bedspread. The room is quiet, a stark contrast to the jovial banter from moments ago. She closes her eyes, relishing in the silence and feeling the weariness settle into her bones. Suddenly, she hears a soft knock coming from the adjoining door, breaking the silence.
“Hey neighbour!” Yunho grins as Luna opens the door between their hotel rooms.
“Yun!” Luna giggles at his antics as he moves aside to let her into his room
“Is your room okay?” he inquires, closing the door behind her.
“Yeah, it's great!” she replies with a faint smile.
“Are you okay?” Yunho's concern is evident in his voice. His arms automatically envelop her into a hug
Luna sinks into his embrace with a sigh, her body melting against his. "Just a bit tired. I wish I had my suitcase so I could change into something comfy." Her words are muffled against his chest.
“I can give you something to change into until our luggage arrives.” Yunho's hand strokes her hair soothingly.
“What about you?” she asks
“I’ll be okay.” he replies kissing the top of her head, "We could take a nap together if you want."
Luna peers up at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Just trying to get me in your bed, huh Mr. Jeong?"
Yunho's laugh rumbles through his chest. "You know I'd have you in my bed 24/7 if I could." He runs his hands down her back. "But we both need sleep, and it'll be a couple hours before our bags arrive." he adds placing a soft kiss to her forehead
As Luna leans back into Yunho, her body feels heavy and sleep calls to her. Jet lag seeps into her bones, urging her to rest as she nuzzles into the soft cotton of Yunho's sweatshirt, inhaling his scent. "Mm a nap does sound good right now," she murmurs through a yawn.
“Let me grab you something to change into.” he says gently, releasing her from his hold. “Next time, pack a spare set of clothes in your carry-on. It’s always handy after long flights, especially when we're stuck waiting for our bags.”
“I'll remember that for next time,” Luna promises as Yunho hands her an oversized t-shirt.
“I would offer you some sweats, but they’d swallow you whole,” Yunho chuckles.
“This is perfect, thanks,” Luna reassures him.
She lays the t-shirt on the bed and begins to slip off her hoodie and t-shirt. Noticing Yunho turning away, Luna questions, “Why are you looking away?” She unbuttons her jeans and pulls them off before putting Yunhos t-shirt over her head. The long length of it resembles a dress on her short frame compared to him.
"To give you privacy," he replies, the edges of his ears blushing into a shade of red.
“Yunho…” she says wrapping her arms around him from behind, “You’ve seen me naked and even pulled my underwear off with your teeth… do you think I care about you seeing me in my underwear right now?”
“It’s just… I want to respect you and your boundaries.” he says
Luna moves her arms to his waist and turns him around to face her. “With you I don’t have any.” she goes on her tiptoes to kiss his lips. “I am yours.” she whispers
Yunho nods, a small smile playing on his lips as he takes in her words. “I’m yours too.”
Luna, hearing a sudden vibration from her phone, lifts it from the desk she placed it on and winces at the battery notification.
“Shit! Can I charge up my phone in here?” Luna's voice is urgent, filled with a hint of panic. "I am on like 10%!"
“Of course. You can use my charger.” he replies pulling it out his bag and handing it to her.
As Luna plugs her phone in Yunho gets changed into a pair of sweats and takes his sweatshirt off, revealing a black tank top underneath.
Luna quickly texts her mom to let her know she’s arrived in LA and sees a new message from Hongjoong, apologising for going into leader mode over the Eden situation. She quickly replies, it is okay and thanking him for looking after her. As she sits on the edge of the bed and places the phone on the bedside table, Yunho pulls her towards him, causing her to giggle and fall onto the plush mattress with a soft thud. Her laughter echoes through the room, filling it with joy and warmth.
"Fuck, I love that laugh," Yunho grins, hovering over her as she lays back against the soft bedding. His hands move to her arms, pinning them down to the mattress and kisses her deeply. His fingers trace the scars on her wrists that he had only recently noticed. Intertwining their fingers, he feels her moan softly against his lips.
“Time to sleep, little one.” Yunho smiles as their lips part. “When you wake, our luggage will be here. We can shower, get changed and meet the others for dinner in Hongjoong’s room.”
“Can we shower together?” Luna asks sleepily, stifling a yawn.
“Whatever you want.” he whispers, tucking some of her hair behind her ear as he lays down beside her.
Yunho feels a flutter inside him as she cuddles into him and closes her eyes. He knew in this moment that his feelings towards her had shifted, he was beginning to fall for her and that it could complicate everything if he allows himself to fall completely.
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