#I started writing this story and initially wanted to post the full work on ao3

[seoheesoo]

What if Sakumo were alive and how much would Kakashi's life be different?

[Part 2]

"Kakashi!" - a loud voice sounded right above the boy’s ear, but he didn’t even flinch. - "Papa said that today you are coming to spend the night with us! Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

Kakashi turned his gaze to the boy. He pouted his lips offendedly and frowned. Kakashi shrugged his shoulders. The boy's bad mood instantly gave way to bright enthusiasm.

"I've already figured out what we're going to do!"

Guy's dark eyes literally sparkled with joyful excitement. Kakashi looked away.

"And what is that?" - Hatake said barely audibly.

"First of all, we will do our homework", - Guy raised his finger up. - "To become excellent shinobi, we must first graduate from the Academy with the best grades."

"I’ll graduate from the Academy with the best grades", - Kakashi shrugged condescendingly.

"I know, you are my Eternal Rival! I wouldn't have chosen you if you weren't like that..!" - Guy exclaimed solemnly.

Kakashi rolled his eyes. They walked towards the Might family's house. The small house was located slightly away from the village, closer to the forest. Not too far away was the residence of the Hatake family. Kakashi wasn't a frequent visitor to Might's house, but he did stay over for dinner a few times.

"Did Sakumo-san go on a mission today?" - asked Guy.

"Yes", - Kakashi answered quietly.

This was father's first mission in weeks. Kakashi knew the reason why his father had been suspended from missions all this time. He couldn't help but know. He was literally followed by the whispers of people as he walked through the village. People hissed behind him, twisted their faces and turned away from him. Kakashi knew that their emotions were not directed at him personally, but at his father. But they were too afraid to say anything to the Hatake family's face. After Jiraiya's visit a few days ago, his father had changed. Kakashi felt it in his gaze, in his gestures and in the tone of his voice. It was as if his father had lifted off a huge, heavy weight that was weighing on his shoulders. Jiraiya appeared so suddenly and left very quickly, but somehow miraculously helped Sakumo. Kakashi promised himself that the next time they met, he would allow his uncle to hug him a few seconds longer.

"And after dinner we’ll play shogi", - Guy’s excited voice reached Kakashi.

"Mm", - he hummed in response, having listened to most of the boy’s story.

They quickly reached the house. Kakashi took off his shoes and put his shoes back in place, and then followed Guy into his room. It was a little strange how familiar he felt being in Might's house. The feeling of safety and comfort that he experienced behind these walls sometimes shocked him. But he tried not to think about it. Sakumo went on a mission and asked Duy to look after his son. Kakashi often had to stay home alone when Sakumo left the village. But after the incident, his father could not leave him alone. Kakashi understood this. Given the current situation, people's aggressiveness towards Sakumo could result in an attempt on Kakashi's life. Kakashi himself didn't mind staying at Might's house for a few days. Deep down, he was even glad. He didn't want to be alone. Even though he was a genius and a talented shinobi, he was still a child who, like other children, was sometimes scared by ordinary things.

"Are you done, Kakashi?"

The boy emerged from his thoughts and nodded affirmatively. It turned out that Guy had finished his homework some time ago and was sitting quietly next to him, trying not to disturb Kakashi. Hatake chortled barely audibly. Guy was not as stupid as everyone around him thought. In fact, he was smarter than most of their classmates. Including Obito, especially Obito.

"Now let's go outside!" - Guy jumped up and ran out of the house.

Kakashi tiredly followed him.

"So what do we do now?" - the excessive boredom in Kakashi’s voice did not shake Guy’s enthusiasm for a second.

"Do you remember today that sensei told us about the Summoning?" - waiting for the boy to nod, Guy continued. - "I thought it would be cool if we could summon someone in the future!"

Guy jumped up and down impatiently. Kakashi sighed heavily.

"In fact, I already signed the contract", - Hatake muttered, looking away.

This happened a few days before Jiraiya's arrival. As soon as his uncle found out that he had already signed the contract, he was noticeably upset. He really wanted Kakashi to undergo training at Mount Myōboku in the future, just like himself. Kakashi expected a strong reaction from Guy. He expected a surge of emotions, particularly envy. That's why he still hasn't told anyone that he signed the contract. He knew that if he confessed today, he wouldn't be able to avoid Obito's irritated looks. However…

"Is it true?" - Guy's small hands tightly squeezed Kakashi's thin shoulders. - "It's so cool! Just what you would expect from my Rival!"

Kakashi blinked in surprise and looked at Guy's face, which was literally glowing with joy.

"What animal can you summon?"

"Dogs", - Kakashi answered, and then for some reason continued. - "Do you want me to summon them right now?"

"Yes! I want!" - Guy shouted loudly.

Kakashi moved his shoulders, dropping the boy’s hands, and then pulled a kunai out of his bag. Slightly pricked his index finger, Kakashi folded the correct seals.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"

A whole pack appeared in a cloud of smoke. The Ninken looked at Kakashi in surprise. This was only the third time he had summon them. And the only time he did it without his father. Pakkun's gaze glanced at him and then at the boy standing next to him. The Ninken had already heard the smell of Guy on Kakashi's clothes, so they understood that he did not pose any threat to him.

"Hey, kid", - Pakkun approached Kakashi. - "Something happened? Why did you summon us?"

"No, nothing happened", - Kakashi sat down on one knee. - "I just wanted to introduce you."

The Ninken simultaneously turned their gaze to Guy. The boy was confused for a second, and then bowed deeply.

"It is a great honor for me to meet the Ninken of my Eternal Rival!" - Guy said loudly and solemnly.

Pakkun gave Kakashi a questioning look. The boy waved his hand. Without thinking twice, the Ninken rushed at Guy and knocked him to the ground. Might laughed heartily. Kakashi sat down on the cool ground and watched with a ghostly smile as Bisuke and Guruko ran after Guy, trying to catch him. Pakkun chuckled.

"Is Sakumo-san on a mission?"

"Yes."

"You didn’t summon us for protection", - there were notes of surprise in Pakkun’s voice. - "You don't need protection here."

Kakashi remained silent. His Ninken could feel that he was completely safe.

"I’m glad", - Pakkun put his paw on Kakashi’s knee.

They continued to watch as the dogs and Guy ran around the edge of the forest. Guy's hair was disheveled, a wide smile never left his lips, and his eyes sparkled with sincere joy, which was transmitted to the Ninken. Kakashi pulled out a small package from his bag and tossed it to Guy. Might poured the treat into his palm and handed it to each Ninken.

"Thank you for allowing me to spend this wonderful evening with you!" - Guy gently stroked Ūhei's soft fur. - "I will be immensely happy if I get to meet all of you again!"

Ninken surrounded Guy, leaving fur and their scent on his green suit. Kakashi rolled his eyes at their overly touching goodbye.

"That’s it, it’s time for you to leave", - he raised his hand and lazily waved at them. - "Bye."

The corners of Guy's lips turned downward after the pack disappeared. Kakashi frowned. He didn't want Might's mood to worsen. However, sadness quickly gave way to enthusiasm.

"Help me sign the contract, Kakashi! I want my own personal summon too!"

"Okay", - Hatake shrugged his shoulders. - "And what animal do you want to summon?"

Part 1 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

[fanovember]

Fanovember 2024 prompt list

(Written list below the line)

We decided to go through literary genres this time, although you can fit the prompt however you please (by using the literal word in your piece, a small reference, or writing in the style of that prompt!)

→We'll be posting some ideas every day to spark creativity if any prompt in particular doesn't work well for you. Although you don't have to complete the challenge 100% (I won't, more on that later)

→There's no limit on extension at all, whatever you need will be fine. (At least 200 words was the initial idea, but I, for instance, sometimes need less)

→You can write in any language you want, we'll repost anyway. It's also valid if you mix languages! (I'll use Spanish since the media I've chosen is originally in that language)

→Arists are welcome too, of course!

→Some people suggested creating an Ao3 Collection for this challenge and we have listened carefully (also had some help from @prettysophist, tysm again!) So here it is! Fanovember 2024 Ao3 Collection is now available for all of you. Remember to tag and categorize your works correctly so people can find what they'r looking for/avoid anything they don't want to read. Be nice!

→Remember to mention this blog @fanovember and use any (or all) of these tags both here and on Ao3:

#fanovember

#fanovember 2024

#fanovember 24

→Needless to say, this event does NOT allow AI generated content of any kind. We want to see the most human of arts and writings

Personally, I don't think I'm completing the full list, as I'm absolutely surpassed by daily responsibilities. But since Softober went well, I'll choose 12 or 13 of the prompts that appeal to me the most and write those throughout the month. You can do whatever works best for you too, we don't want you to feel pressured by any means.

Choose your fandom (or fandoms) and start creating! Let's have some fun!!

Fanovember 2024

01. Romance

02. Short story

03. Terror

04. Adventure

05. Art

06. Retelling

07. Historical

08. Journal

09. Theatre

10. Witchcraft

11. Religion

12. Fantasy

13. Astrology

14. Mithology

15. Poetics

16. Reality show

17. Press

18. Urban fantasy

19. Film/Movie

20. Family

21. Music

22. Epistolary

23. Sci-fi

24. Autobiography

25. Cuisine

26. Dance

27. Board games

28. Classic

29. Triller

30. Flash-fiction

[toointojoelmiller]

Update: I continue to work on all things! Nothing is abandoned! New chapters will come!

The actual, fun and exciting update: I'm going to start recommending a few AMAZING TLOU fics that you might have missed on my blog every Saturday for the next while.

I hope you find some new great reads to keep you going while we wait for season 2 - our fandom is seriously so freaking talented, and there are SO many incredibly written fics out there that I want to yell about a bunch of them! Please reblog!

These fics will vary re: how closely they stick to canon and what themes they explore, but you can expect them all to be wonderfully written and, obviously, heavily feature Joel Miller.

Some of these, including this weeks, may include mature content - make sure to read and heed the trigger warnings listed on ao3!

I have never really been interested in fan fiction with OCs, so I missed out on this week's recommendation for a long time and I bet a lot of you did too. It's both a wonderfully told Joel love story and a fic that, in my opinion, really honours the world and characters of TLOU.

Go Your Own Way by @chronicallyonlinewriter 232,575 words || 31 chapters rating: mature [see ao3 tags for full content warnings] featuring: post season/game 1 life in Jackson, angst, fluff, action, romance, smut, plenty of protective Joel and parent Joel

You can check out a review from @march-flowerr below, describing some of what makes this story so special: (vague general spoilers re: themes and mature content)

“Go Your Own Way stands, in my mind, as one of the most well written piece of fiction on Archive of Our Own. Nandorluna has such an intimate and authentic take on the existing characters that we know and love (on Joel and Ellie and all the Jackson gang) but it’s her ability to create stunning, well fleshed out original characters that drew me to her story initially. Her main character, Benny, moves across the story in such a visceral and realistic way; her arc spans not just the present canon timeline, but transports us through an entire lifetime: from childhood to outbreak, to first love, to first loss, to heartbreak and grief and then finally, to her heart’s final resting place: Joel Miller.

Zee manages to write about and embrace such difficult topics as assault, pregnancy loss, and grief without ever once making a show of it. She handles each moment with quiet dignity and intense self reflection; she draws beauty from the hollow depth of heart ache and despair without ever once losing the thread of hope that The Last of Us is known for.

At the heart of Go Your Own Way is the love story of Joel and Benny. Zee manages to create a compelling story about brokenness and connection and the raw, rare glory that is finding someone with whom you can begin to fit yourself together with again. It’s a story of family - of people who when left to wander, find their hearts drawn to each other. It’s a story about love - each relationship, from Benny and Alexei’s long friendship, to Ellie and Joel’s turbulent first years, to Benny and Joel’s steadfast devotion for each other, caters to the soul. It’s a story that I’ve found myself returning to, again and again, in all moods and places in life. If I could change anything about it, it would only be that it did have to end after all."

If you read and love this, please please show the author some love and leave a kudos and comment!! Happy fandoming y'all.

[stashandtell]

Newest Fic: Ranking the Weasleys

Hermione was drunk. It was all Ginny’s fault.

“RANK MY BROTHERS, Hermione! The people deserve to know!”

“OKAY! Okay. FINE. I give in! I’ll rank all your brothers, based on their looks AND PERSONALITIES. You have such a morbid fascination with how shaggable I find your brothers!”

“You’re STALLING!”

Hermione huffed as she tucked into a ball and then shoved Ginny in the butt with her lint-covered sock. This was a normal girls’ night for them. Lots of wine, shouting, and playful-but-catty roughhousing.

Read Ranking the Weasleys on AO3

- - - -

I'm so happy to be sharing this on the deadline I set for myself, which is today, Hermione's birthday, 9/19/24. As a very new fanfiction writer, who is committed to enjoying this hobby as long as the muse is with me on it, I had marked a handful of bdays of some of my favorite characters as occasions to post fics this year. It's been a nice way to stick with projects and put some artificial pressure on myself. Originally I was working to release a piece based around Hermione getting a belated Moon Party thrown for her by the Gryff girls. Moon parties are typically thrown for young people when they start menstruation if their friends and/or families are into that sort of thing. I'm still working on that fic but I did quickly push pause on it last weekend when, at 2 AM, after letting myself indulge in almost a full day of writing a different fic, I had the seed of the idea for Ranking the Weasleys and cranked out a very formidable first draft in 2 hours. (Yes, this means I went to sleep juuuuust before the sun was preparing to rise. Worth it.) When the words flow, you go with it. It also happens that I'm participating in The Weasley Clock Discord's Bingo Collection (Event? Fest? Bingo-Thing?) and this covers my square for "Ginny Weasley" quite nicely!

- - - - About Fred, George, Bill, and Fetishizing War Wounds These are some initial thoughts I had on the subject and is in no way a comprehensive analysis of the topic.

I wasn't expecting to discover that Fred's battle injury and recovery included him using a wheelchair for the rest of his life in this story but it came out in the writing process. I thought deeply about how, in many Harry Potter fanfics, we see examples of fetishizing elements of people's injuries or hardships (I say this in a non-judgemental way. I truly was pondering it.) If you read Dramione, think about how Draco's Sectumsempra scars are sometimes described. "Scars are sexy" is often a thing in our fandom (and in real life for some!) and it paints a complex picture of attraction, reverence, and attractiveness in a shorthand, accessible way to many readers, from writers. Especially when writers are writing from inside the private minds of characters, the characters are allowed to have thoughts that may not be appropriate or sensitive to others' identities, sense of self, language preferences, etc. It's why many of us love reading fiction; we get an intimate look into the messy, imperfect, and sometimes illicit thought processes of characters. It can be enthralling. But, for this particular, shorter one-shot, I wanted to try to be consistent about how I approached how Hermione was objectifying and trash-talking the characters for many things they either had control over or were core parts of their developed personalities. But what about George's gold ear? I thought about this too. Yes, Hermione thinks the ear is "very fun and cheeky," but she's not into how he's missing an ear or saying that she is attracted the prosthetic because it's a prosthetic or symbolizes a trauma he went through-- my intention was for her to make a comment on the choice of it being solid gold. The opulence of the ear prosthetic was a "fun and cheeky" choice of George's. I hope that came across. I deleted a whole section about how Hermione found Bill to be sexier after his attack from Greyback, not because of the injury but because it changed his mindset about how he wants to protect others.

"...even after he was attacked, he grew even more assured in himself which just made him hotter. And it wasn’t the mild-lycanthropy that made him more confident..."

I couldn't make it work without it being clunky and preachy, so I cut it. I wanted to make sure Bill's scars and the effects of a werewolf affliction weren't portrayed as a turn-on in the very same piece where I was trying to navigate a sensitivity and neutrality to Fred's use of a chair. Sometimes it IS best to "murder your darlings," amiright? I'll admit, I fell in love with Fred in this fic and how he's hot and cold with Hermione, even though he's pretty successful in the dating field with other wixen. Maybe this fic will inspire something longer [shrugs]. I grew fond of some of the implied backstories that grew out of this absolute brain-barf I was seemingly compelled to type out through tired, tired eyes. - - - -

A while ago, I drafted a post ranking all my favorite Hermione/Weasley sibling ships, and it was nice to have such a hefty post pre-written that fit in with all this. It was likely the base of the fic I would write-- cooking along on the back burner of my brain until it was ready to served out. I appreciate that my inner-monologue-made-outer-tumblr-posts may be another way of puzzling out plots I may eventually create! Check It Out:

Nobody Asked For This: My Rankings of the Hermione x Weasley Ships with REASONS (tumblr post)

Some Recommendations for Fics That Influenced My Weasley-Ship Rankings (tumblr post)

Ranking the Weasleys, a Harry Potter fanfic by stashandtell on AO3

[tamamatango]

My Project Revealed: The Fabled Fanfiction Come to Fruition

Crossing an item off the bucket list before the dopamine gods give out on me. (Yes that’s the story link in case you want to just go there and skip the whole me not shutting up part)

Back in my most active period in the Keroro fandom, I tried and failed multiple times to write a fanfic; might’ve even talked about it here at some point. But for one reason or another, it just never panned out, and I ultimately fell out of it for a few years before I managed to publish anything. However, I got back into the practice with my next hyperfixation, so now that I’ve returned to frog hell again, I knew I had to do what teenage me could not.

I can’t say this is “the fanfic I always wanted to write,” because I ended up scrapping whatever I had started all those years ago. When this started to come together in my head, it initially seemed way too ambitious given the limited time I have and where my strengths and weaknesses lie as a writer…but I got possessed by the artsy demon or something and started to write it anyway. Whoops.

To Chase a Butterfly asks one simple question: What if Kururu actually failed to save Saburo at the end of episode 229? Okay that’s not really a simple question, considering it leads to a whole emotional and physical journey about grief and companionship and space-timey shenanigans. But basically, Kururu goes “bet” and attempts to bring him back to life. Naturally, the deuteragonist of such a story is…Dororo? Yes, at the central conflict of the story is Kururu’s friendship with Saburo, but it’s Dororo who serves as his confidant/partner in crime over the course of the story, and so I consider this to double as a KuruDoro fic as well—though I will make it clear now that it’s not conclusively romantic, so you can decide if that’s the direction they go in or if it stays platonic, and it works either way.

As of the latest update from. Uh. 15 minutes ago at the time of writing, the fic currently sits at about 60-65% completion and is divided into two parts. Part 1 (chapters 1–6) is the angst/drama-heavy half, which I uploaded in full as a batch drop. Part 2 (7+) is more action/adventure, sort of in the vein of what you’d expect from one of the Keroro movies, and I am updating it chapter-by-chapter, since it was getting too unsustainable to try to dump it all at once. AO3 has the most robust features, so that’s where it’s hosted for now, but I know people have very understandable problems with that site, so I’ll consider porting it elsewhere if that’s something anyone is interested in.

Well, that’s enough yammering from me. If you like the idea, please do check it out. Things are starting to heat up as the climax approaches, especially with the introduction of a surprise third major character who very longtime Kirb fans miiiight faintly recall. And if you’re already following it—it’s been up for a while now, just waited to discuss it here to temporarily save myself from potential embarrassment—thanks for your support, and I hope you look forward to the rest! Part 2 is very research/planning heavy and has been pretty challenging to write so far, but I intend to see this all the way through damn it. And yeah, this is what’s been pulling my focus away from the blog, but there will still be posts here whenever I feel like putting energy into an essay and/or next real info drop about the new anime (BNP gimme something soon please I’m parched).

[charredashes]

Writing Commission Info Post

Commissions are: OPEN

Need a writer for a project? Want an indulgent fic of your favorite crackship? Or maybe you're an artist looking for a short story about your OCs? Hit me up! Full details, rules, and prices below!

I might be the right writer for you if ...

You want a writer who'll work with you every step of the way to make sure the work exceeds your expectations. I pride myself on professionalism from planning to delivery!

You want a writer who'll put the work in on research. Whether you want me to write for a fandom I'm unfamiliar with or want period-accurate details for your 1750s royalty AU, I'm your guy!

You want a writer who'll let you be as hands-on or hands-off as you like. Want to give me a single sentence idea and leave it to me to work it into a 7k fic? Want to deliver me a scene by scene outline, a list of your headcanons, and a dozen meta character study posts to work off of? I'm happy to accommodate any level of involvement you'd like to have, and I'm experienced working with clients at both ends of the spectrum.

What do I write?

Anything and everything! I will work in any fandom, any ship - as long as they fall within the rules I'll list below.

But what am I best at? Dialogue, character interactions, intimacy and emotions. Am I the right person to talk to if you want an action thriller? Probably not, but talk to me anyway! If I don't think I can do your idea justice, I will always be upfront with you about that rather than deliver a subpar finished product.

I do write NSFW! As I write romance and erotica professionally, this is actually the area I have the most experience with. I am specifically experienced in writing erotica featuring kink, LGBT+ characters, and monstery or otherwise non-human characters like vampires and werewolves. Am I the right person to talk to if you want a spicy romance between two gay draculas? Absolutely I am.

Rules & Limits

I will not create work featuring non-consensual sex, romantic or sexual relationships between an adult and a minor (or any other work featuring minors in sexual situations), bestiality, scat, emetophilia, or sexualized bigotry.

I will not write RPF or Harry Potter.

I reserve the right to turn down work for any reason, be it listed above or otherwise, or for no reason at all.

Unsure if I'm the right person for your commission? Contact me! I will always be honest and professional. If your commission falls outside my boundaries or my abilities, I will tell you as much, no worries!

Prices & Discounts

Stories start at 0.03/word. This breaks down to $30 per thousand words, and my commissions have a $10 minimum. You may also be eligible for the following discounts:

10% off if the commission is for a work that I'm already intimately familiar with. This is essentially a discount for my not needing to do heavy research and may not apply if the specifics of your commission call for extensive research in their own right, such as existing within an AU that differs substantially from canon. I will let you know if what you're interested in qualifies for this discount during our initial discussion.

5% off for works over 5k words

These don't stack, but you'll always get the higher discount if you're eligible for it.

Have a budget? Let's talk, I'll do my best to make it work.

Half the price is expected before I start working, while the other half is expected after I've finished the initial draft. Time to completion can vary based on length and complexity, as well as if there's a queue. I will always keep you informed of where your work stands and when you can expect it to be finished.

Want to see an example of my work? My older stuff is available on AO3 but I will admit to it being a few years out of date. Most of my more recent work has been for long-form personal projects and private clients, so not stuff I'd post publicly. If you'd like to see more recent writing, I'll gladly send you something relevant for whatever kind of work you're looking to have done.

You can see my Linktree for links to my AO3 accounts, among other useful things!

Thanks so much for reading! Reblogs are appreciated! You can DM me here with any questions or contact me via Twitter or email, both listed in my Linktree!

[quaranmine]

Next steps for the AU:

-I have a couple of analysis-type posts to make. I love talking about this fic lol so I have a lot to say still. Included in this will be a review of art symbolism, setting as a character, and some selected real-life cases and research I ran across. I may also talk a little about fire symbolism as well as my fun fire-related words I purposefully scattered around (if you noticed me describe feelings as a spark a lot, it was on purpose lol.) I also may talk about a couple things that didn't end up happening, or did happen but almost didn't.

-This weekend I am going to revisit the fic chapters 8-12 to see if I can add more art to them. I had initially wanted more art pieces throughout the fic but the art would sometimes delay finished chapters for weeks (i have to both draw and color it traditionally, photograph it in good light, and then digitally edit it) so I started worrying less about it. If I do I will post those pieces and retroactively add them in the chapter.

-Speaking of retroactive edits, some earlier chapters of the story on AO3 have some issues with em dashes appearing smaller than they should be. This is corrected in my original document but I never got around to correcting the published chapters (i am always mildly worried the formatting will break lol.) When I do this I will also add cocoabats' cover into the first chapter. I also plan to retroactively edit some of my Fire Finder Math in chapter 3 because I think I made Grian's tower taller than it needs to be/at the wrong elevation. This won't affect the chapter outcome at all I just Need that to be accurate for myself

-I have a great many web weaving materials that I have slowly collected over the months that I would like to mess with again. I have been saving them in a #f tag on my main blog, but I didn't make any except for one because I wanted the full context of the story to be published.

-Going to upload the Letters from the Lookout drabbles into the AO3 series. Hopefully in the future I may add more. Or, I may not. We'll see. I also have a Scar-centric story called "Alpenglow" in my outline. based on its structure it may have multiple chapters, but it will not have any sort of through-line plot. It's selected scenes from his 8 years career as a lookout. I want to write this, but I don't know if it will be or not. With the main fic done I will be releasing my brain to work on other projects/ideas that I didn't want to get distracted by earlier. That doesn't mean it won't happen, it just means that it may not happen on a fast timeline.

[snugglesquiggle]

i feel a lil bad asking this right when a lot of people are excited for hostile takeover, but for financial reasons, i might need to start putting some of my energy into more serious original projects again.

i'm not pausing HT — i don't think i could stop thinking about those lezbots if i tried — but being able to take breaks to work on other things tends to be good for my energy levels in general.

and honestly, when i first started, i thought HT itself was just going to be a quick break from those projects, and now i'm four months in and my plans keep growing >.>

anyway, the purpose of this post is that i wanted to gauge interest. i know most people follow me for murder drones stuff, but do any of the original stories i'm considering interest you?

more detailed pitches for each of these can be found under the cut. honesty is appreciated.

a note before i pitch them — when i write original fiction, i post it to my site and a site for original fiction called royalroad. i'll probably reserve my ao3 account for, yknow, fanfiction.

the plan is that while the stories will eventually be available publically, supporters to my patreon will get to read several chapters ahead of everyone else.

Aurora Moonrise

It is the nature of comets to dazzle and destroy. These eldritch spirits from beyond the stars grind kingdoms to dust with joyful ease. Only the power of a daughter of the moon can repel them. There are none left. Aurora knows she is different. Her father is a plain man, and her mother is a mystery. Her prismatic hair, her divergent mind, her inability to weave common enchantments — it must come from her mother's side. But her mother is gone and no one will say why or where or anything. It's enough to make her want to fight someone. And Aurora fights — people, animals, spirits, it doesn't matter. She doesn't want to hurt them, but it's thrilling. She'll just have to become a knight — knights get to fight things, right? And knights get answers to who their parents were. When a cursed storm leaves Aurora glowing in the light of the full moon, she awakens new powers she can't control. Powers unheard of, except in those old stories. But the word on the lips of churchmen is witchcraft — communion with unnatural spirits that spells doom. Will she defend humanity? Or is she a threat to it?

pitching this one is hard, because the most interesting thing about is a twist reveal at the end of the first arc. at first, you can see it's framed to suggest — and Aurora initially believes — her mother is a "daughter of the moon", but of course, she's actually a comet.

as the poll option suggests, her inhuman heritage makes urges her to fight and hinders her ability to understand the basics of human social interaction.

this would be a long story, lighter in tone than the others, and structured like a fantasy trilogy, about Aurora journeying across the land doing what she thinks heroes do. along the way, she picks up several party members with their own weird baggage. all of them girls, of course, and it gets very gay by the end — but it's slow going because, yknow, aurora doesn't understand romance, either.

i'm very excited about this project — just thinking about it is enough to get me bouncing. you can actually read a four chapter teaser right now, and i have over 70k words of notes past that, with the whole thing outlined start to finish.

Thy Wretched Mask

Everyone wants to peel off their skin and scream into the night. You're just supposed to keep a handle on that. Beca's trying. Now on the run, she'll just have to get it right in a new town. She's got nothing to her name save a pet raven, but a little pickpocketing will change that. Maybe a burglary or two. As long as she doesn't tear someone's flesh apart in broad daylight, she could keep things controlled. It's a lonely life, but friendship is only temptation. She should just keep to herself. So why does she listen when the woman from the shadows talks? They're making an offer that could lift her off the streets for good. The catch? She has to kill someone. Again. That's definitely too much temptation.

once again, the most interesting parts of this are a surprise. Beca isn't human; she's saddled predatory instincts she doesn't understand. the "fungal possession" comes into play several chapters in. it gets intense enough that i believe it's one of the few times i've teared up while writing something, and it's so far the first and only time i've written something that explores topics of plurality, which is pretty personal to us

i say HT is the first time i've written romance (and it is), but TWM came close, and would have gotten even closer if i continued it.

i've already written over 20k words of this (unpublished), but due to the writing exercise it began as, it requires substantial rewrites; i cringe when i try to reread it, and it honestly makes the prospect of returning a bit unexciting.

this would probably only about the length of a novel. (original projection was novella length, but i think i want to flesh it out more.)

of all of my potential projects, i think this one is probably the biggest thematic overlap with Hostile Takeover. but uh, it's dark enough to make that look like a sappy romance >.<

Running Out of Skin & Time

Tomorrow, a lord will be flayed alive. Once his flesh, freely given, is woven into a vast frame, enchanted scars will turn him into a living portal, a gift that could turn a blightstricken town into a bustling trade nexus. Apnoe has woken up beside the same dead girl three nights in a row. The lord's flaying is tomorrow — same as it was for the last three nights. She's the only one who's noticed. Assassins lurk in the flaying festival's crowds, and when they strike the lord dead, the whole town watches their dreams crumble, and then Apnoe wakes again as if from a dream. She knew this quite well; on the first night, she had killed him. Scarred flesh grants magic. How deep a wound did it take to make every living soul in the city relive the same day? It wasn't Apnoe's, and she doesn't know why only she remembers, but then again, most scar magic treats her differently. After all, she's dead half the time. Apnoe would kill to end this nightmare — but it seems the only way out is saving a man who'll die tomorrow anyway.

of all the options, this story is the least well flesh out (no pun intended), but it has a lot of potential. a "time loop" where a character relives the same day over and over is something not enough stories explore well

(if it means anything to you, the inspiration for this fic was literally just thinking "what if the Shibuya Incident was a time loop?")

i call this "superhero fantasy" because, while i havent figured out the tech level (it's industrial, but how modern?), the magic system gives everyone unique and specific abilities that are easiest to imagine as superpowers.

the time loop effect itself is the rube goldberg interaction of half a dozen powers, and part of the fic is puzzling out just how it works, as well as puzzling out how to overcome the various powers arrayed against the lord.

it would be a very complex, cerebral fic, all about power progression and fight scenes, but at its heart, i want it to be the story of two dead girls who love each other enough to unravel fate itself

A Chimerical Hope

Duskroot is destroyed. A minor stronghold, its enemies were cunning and coordinated and its allies didn't lift a hand. As vultures at a corpse, mercenaries hunt for survivors. Awelah escaped Duskroot. She lost everything. Vengeance drives her, but can she kill a angel beyond death? Ooliri's mission is to aid the refugees. He has to prove he belongs in a family of medical geniuses. But healing isn't enough — can he bring the dead back to life? Makuja seeks safety among the refugees. Death and servitude leaves her gaze empty. It's easy to be a follower, but is there a purpose worth living for? First, the three need answers. A grand scheme is unfolding, and Duskroot was only the first step.

unlike all of the others, this isn't an idea for a story, or a plan for a story, it is a story, one i've written 100k words for. you can read it here

it's set in an expansive setting i've spent literal years thinking about with giant insects empowered by virulent mutant bat blood and cold black corruption pouring out from a hole in the sky.

it's also, shamelessly, only avoids being called naruto fanfiction by dint of sheer weirdness

Aurora Moonrise may be the story i'm most excited about, but ACH is the one with the most ambition and purpose behind it. if i could only ever tell one story in my life, it'd probably make it ACH. it might be over a million words if i ever finish it

but i also think it's probably too weird to get very popular.

And so on

if you can't tell already, i have a LOT of story ideas. before i ever watched murder drones, would you believe i was literally already working on a story about killer lesbian robots on a inhospitable frozen planet haunted by a creeping cosmic horror?

and i'm kind of tempted to work on a story about modular mushroom creatures that live underground. or a fricken pokemon mystery dungeon self-insert i've already finished one chapter of.

and of course, i have several other stories i could continue working on.

but like, the stories i've listed are the ones i can honestly say i might work on right now. and, practically speaking, the stories that might genuinely takeoff, if i dare hope.

[inexplicablymine]

IM ATTACKING YOU RIGHT BACK 🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️ how did you get into fandom/writing fic and how do you come up with inspiration for fic ideas? is there a specific place or time of day that strikes you?

Ahem… BUCKLE IN FOLKS this is a long af answer but I have the time. So sit down with your popcorn. Lola this all your fault 🥰

How did you get into fandom: I have (brace yourselves) read in fandom for over 15 years before participating in any way shape or form outside of just enjoying it from the comfort of my screen. I read or watched something many moons ago and said I want more and tada I was initiated. But I stuck around for so long because of the sheer creativity, and talent, and ingenuity of people globally to come together and say “we want more and if you won’t give us more we will do it ourselves.”

I was that reader that lurked with guest kudos and left random inane comments from accounts you could never trace back to one place. When I mean read I mean… if I did have an AO3 account or an ffnet account during that period of time, the sheer number of works in the history would be of concern to everyone.

How did you get into writing fic: As for writing in general, I have a stack of journals I’ve kept since middle school, and an itch in my fingers that feels like I am broken if I am not writing. From the minute I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up “author” was the answer and it’s always sat at the back of my subconscious like one of those rocks in the bottom of your shoe. There are too many stories rattling around in my head that want to get out, but I took a break for 8 years of writing anything except my journal entries because the world can be a cruel place.

I started writing again just this year in June, and it was really a case of “write the things you want to see in the world,” + it’s time to get back on the horse + the thirst to participate more than just sit on the outside peering in at the inside jokes of chapter end notes and tumblr links I never clicked on. I joined a single discord, had a breakdown, and bon appetite here we are 3 months later with an actual AO3 account, a Tumblr, and a WIP list that is at least 15 works long 4 of which are 25+ chapter outlines.

(This truly was fueled by an idea I had this March for a RWRB full length mystery novel law-case thriller that I could NOT get out of my head, it now has 37 chapters outlined and is getting written this fall/winter to be posted next year)

Where does your inspiration come from: My inspiration comes from everything everywhere all at once. (Not meant to be a reference but it was too good not to use). A not so succinct list of places I’ve found inspiration:

the truth is stranger than fiction: my first day post for FirstPrince week is a “there was only one tent” situation that actually happened on a camping trip this summer. I screamed internally the entire time it was going down.

Songs: I could never write while listening to music except I absolutely will imagine storylines from it. The song Delilah by Mikolas Josef and Mark Neve is going to produce a smutty RWRB one shot of a ski weekend hookup

Co-Authoring: I am currently working on two different co-authored fics. One with @celaestis1 that was just us lovingly yelling at eachother in the DM’s until an outline was made and now every chapter we write makes me more and more giddy. The other is a RWRB x PJO au with @read-and-write- and @userd0esn0texist that is genuinely the most ridiculous fun I have ever had plotting. There is a full blown super six prophecy y’all are not ready.

Prompts: my first two works ever (ever!) were based off of the same prompt for a gift fic exchange. “Don’t look at me I thought we were getting ice cream” (you can read the results of that prompt here or here) I’m participating in @thebrownstone FirstPrince Week which has 7 prompts and @halloweenhuh with two different prompts as well. Sometimes it’s the best way to get the juices flowing.

Asking for it: if someone asks “hey is there a fic that does this” and I haven’t found it, it is really easy to think “hmmm but maybe I could write it” and then the dominos fall and I’m stuck with a problem of my own creation

Fulfilling a need or gap in the fandom: honestly, my current WIP I’m posting is an Ace!Alex fic because well… we need more ace fic in general, but also more ace fic that is happy, and positive, and loving. I love a good whump fic as much as the next person, but sometimes you just need some serious fluff. (Also my first two fics are Demi!Alex so maybe I have just stumbled into this on accident though many of my upcoming fics differ from this pattern)

I want it I got it: truly most of my WIP’s started from a “wouldn’t it be funny” idea that then morphed very quickly into an out of control spiral in my notes app.

Betas: the backbone of fandom and honestly the people who help me take incoherent ramblings and make them something readable. So many amazing ideas come from betas leaving comments in my gdocs and for that I am forever thankful

Is there a specific place or time of day that strikes you?: HA I uhhhhhh will wake up in a cold sweat at 4:37 in the morning with a fic idea, I’ll come up with one walking to work, I’ll get an idea standing in like for groceries. Genuinely my notes app is always open. All of the random ideas I get from a line, to a more fleshed out plot idea go into a note or the matching doc called “table scraps” and then if they evolve from there they get their own note or document for them.

First 🧚🧚 Nice Ask Day 🧚🧚 answer and I can’t wait to ask/answer more

[nekoannie-chan]

Secrets Chapter 20: Visiting old friends part I

Pairing: Steve Rogers X OFC, Brock Rumlow X OFC.

Word count: 1870 words.

Summary: Sometimes keeping secrets can be dangerous or a heavy burden, which is what Kathleen has been doing for years. She will also be in charge of guiding Steve Rogers into this century; meanwhile, S.H.I.E.L.D. will be looking for a way to kick-start the Avengers Initiative by integrating her as one of the superheroes, but that won't be the only danger they face.

Warnings: None.

A/N: After long time working on this longfic, I finally post it. If you wanna be added to the taglist, let me know.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

You can read it on Wattpad and Ao3 too.

Secrets masterlist.

Previous chapter.

Next chapter.

Steve came out a little upset after the meeting with Fury, he didn't want to go back to being that guy who was only used to making more money, making propaganda and continuing with the war.

“Steve," Kathleen called him, but he ignored her, surely she would say something to convince him, "Steven Grant Rogers! “she said loudly when she saw that he wouldn't stop.

Steve tensed and stopped, she had never called him by his full name, he felt like when his mother scolded him, he turned to find himself in front of her, and he let himself be guided to her office.

“They are not going to use you as they did in the army at the beginning," Kath began to speak, Steve sighed, she had read his mind, "I assure you that the world loves you, they have already seen you in action, you will not be alone, now it is normal that they do interviews to famous or important people, they will do the same to Stark, besides you will not dedicate yourself exclusively to that, you will continue going to missions," she explained to him.

“But they didn't include you, and you also did a great job, and yet they are not recognizing it like the others," the Captain replied

“The world still doesn't like mutants, Stevie, if they promote with me, it will be a negative campaign and we will go back to what happened more than fifteen years ago, it's for safety, you weren't there, but we mutants had to run away to survive," Kath gave a sad smile.

After that talk, Steve went out, Kath remembered that in two days she had to go with Doctor Pym, she went running to Brock's office, but she didn't find him, she was just about to leave when he appeared behind her since he had just returned to his office.

“Kitty, is something wrong? “he questioned since she never went to look for him in his office, it was the other way around or if she needed something she would text him.

“Brockie, hey, listen, I wanted to ask you a favor," he answered in a honeyed voice, making the other raise his eyebrow.

“If it's about the propaganda that Fury and Pierce want to do, I can't do anything about it, you know it's for your safety," he said as he crossed his arms.

“It's not about that, how lazy to be involved in any kind of propaganda, the real situation is... I haven't been shopping for a long time and I would like to skip Thursday's training, please," asked her with a childish tone while she looked at him.

“Kathy, you can't leave me alone with him," complained the Commander, referring to the Captain.

“I haven't said anything to Fury about your fights, but if they go on like this I don't think I'll have a choice," she threatened him while she tangled a lock of his hair on her finger.

“You know you are capricious and manipulative, you know how to convince me, okay, go shopping, but this time it's going to cost you," he replied amused, he couldn't deny her anything when she did those things, she looked so cute, not to mention his feelings for her.

“ What? “she asked cocking her head to one side, she was afraid he was going to tell her that he was going to accompany her.

“An outing together, I'll let you choose the place," he looked at her expectantly.

“Mmm okay, but you have to cover for me so no one finds out I'm running away from obligations “Kath smiled and kissed him on the cheek as a thank you, Brock was about to move so that the kiss would go somewhere else.

“ Rumlow! “A male voice called out to him, making the other two jump.

“Grant, what the hell are you doing here? “Brock asked when he saw who it was.

“I work here too," Grant answered as if it were the most obvious thing to do. Agent Anzai," he greeted her.

“Agent Ward, Rollins," he greeted the two men, "I have things to do, I'll leave so you can talk at ease," she ran away.

“That girl is going to be your undoing," Rollins mumbled.

“Didn't you learn anything at the Academy? If Pierce finds out, you know what will happen to him," Ward pointed out and Brock watched them angrily.

Kathleen entered the dining room of her house, she stood silently watching Steve, he had his eyes fixed on Peggy's file, she felt a pang of pain inside her, although she didn't understand the reasons, however, she remembered that in less than a week he was going to move to his new apartment, she approached him with the phone in her hand.

“Do you want to talk to him? “We can go see her if that's what you want," she took him by the arm to try to lift him, although it was obvious that she wouldn't succeed. Steve, sooner or later she's going to find out, it's better that she sees and hears it in person and not on TV or in some magazine or newspaper “he didn't know why he was telling her that, inside him, the pain was growing. Not to mention that for as long as he could remember he had always tried to keep that woman out of his life, there was something that disturbed him.

Steve knew that Kath was right, although Fury had not yet announced his "return to life" in an official way it was more than evident that explanations had to be given for what happened in the New York attack, however, he was afraid because he knew that Peggy had continued with her life while he was still stuck and he was completely sure that she hated him after everything that had happened. He had little choice but to agree to the mutant's proposal.

Kath opened a portal to get there faster, they were outside the house, and it seemed as if she was practically dragging him away as if he was a small child, she rang the doorbell and a middle-aged lady opened the door, judging by the uniform she was wearing.

“Mmm... Good afternoon, could you tell Mrs Carter that an old friend of hers would like to see her, please? “she asked with a big innocent smile and a sweet tone, she never failed when she used that tone of voice and made that face.

“No, Mrs Carter doesn't receive visitors," the nurse answered rudely while she crossed her arms.

Panic started to invade Steve and he tugged a little on her arm to make them leave, she ignored him and narrowed her eyes as she stared at the nurse, she used her mind control, it was not something she liked to do, but sometimes it was necessary especially when she was denied things.

��Come in, please, in a moment you will be able to see her," he said suddenly, letting them pass.

“What are you doing? “Steve reprimanded her in a low voice while he squeezed her arm.

“I know perfectly well that you want to see her and nothing is going to stop it, I only made things easier and stop squeezing my arm or you will break it, I am more fragile than you," she answered as she broke free from his grip.

A few minutes later the nurse returned to show them the way, they entered the room where Peggy was, and the old woman stared at them in shock, maybe she was dreaming.

“S-Steve, is that you? “she asked confused, Kath nudged Steve to come closer.

“Yes, Peggy, it's me," Steve reached over and took her hand, his face showing a lot of emotion.

“ Katherine? “Peggy asked as she turned to look at her.

“Mmm... no, Katherine was my great-grandmother “she answered, something in her head was starting to bother her, she was hearing incoherent thoughts in the old woman's mind, plus a few memories from her childhood were coming back to her head.

“But you look just like her, come here, I want to get a good look at you," she motioned with her other hand for her to come closer.

Kath approached and Peggy let go of Steve's hand to hug her, that made Kath uncomfortable because at that moment she saw in her mind a memory of Peggy.

“And I'm going to make sure you won't say anything about it, “the woman said while shooting someone.

The sound of the gun echoed in Kath's head; she felt a shiver run down her spine.

“ Kathleen? “Steve called out to her as he grabbed her shoulders.

“ Huh? “ was the only thing that came out of her mouth, that memory left her very confused.

“Peggy asked you a question," Steve scolded her.

“Excuse me, Mrs Carter, I got distracted, please repeat the question," apologized she as she blinked in confusion, even though she didn't know why she had called Carter by his first name, Steve looked at her strangely while Peggy tensed a little, but immediately regained her self-control.

“You sound just like Katherine, dear," Peggy said in a soft voice, and Steve nodded, "I asked you if you had any powers," he took her by the hand.

“Ah yes, sometimes it is useful, sometimes not, I can open portals to go places “ Kath answered quickly, her intuition told her that she should not give much information and less trust, however, she knew that this woman had access to the information in her Organization file; Steve frowned at the answer, he did not understand why she did not tell everything.

Then he listened to the conversation between Steve and Peggy about how they had found him and everything that had happened up to that moment.

When they returned to her house, she didn't feel like talking to anyone, she simply wanted to go to her bedroom and lie down on the bed, it hurt her what had happened, even though she knew it made Steve happy, she hadn't told him what had happened years before. He stopped her before she went in.

“ What was that? “he questioned her with a serious tone.

“ What are you talking about? “His mind was elsewhere.

“ Why didn't you tell Peggy the whole truth? “With one hand he lifted her face to look her straight in the eye.

“I never tell everything about myself to people I've just met as a personal rule, besides it's nothing of mine, if I took you it's because I wanted to see you happy, not to be interrogated," he answered her coldly.

“Peggy is incapable of hurting anyone," Steve said, he could notice a defiant look he had never seen in her before.

“People change over time and we all have a dark side, Steven, and you don't have the slightest idea of what has happened in people's lives over the last seventy years," she replied in a tremulous voice, breaking free from his grip and walked into her room, slamming the door and leaving Steve outside.

Ꭲꭺꮐꮮꮖꮪꭲ:

@saiyanprincessswanie  @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad

@navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940  @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme  @bluemusickid @leyannrae  @harrysthiccthighss @marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1  @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @mylifeispainandiloveit @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch  @sweater-daddiesdumbdork  @jtargaryen18 @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted​  @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer  @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @here4thefanfics​ @theestorm​ @patzammit​

[whotfelsewantedtobelynnyx]

Where I’ve been, and my plans moving forward.

Hey Tumblr (and hopefully my AO3 readers)…it’s been a minute. And I’m sorry for that, I really am. I wanted to pop on here and give y’all an explanation as to what’s been going on with me and where I’ve been…but for a writer, I’m surprisingly short on stuff to say. So I’m just going to start.

Where I’ve been

It’s been at least a month since I’ve posted (and over a year since I’ve updated my most popular series, The Raven House). And…yeah, I feel bad about that. The short version is, I completely changed my lifestyle. The long version is that I finished my semester of school at the end of May last year and just…didn’t go back. Initially, I decided to work full time for awhile to give myself some time to recover after a bad mental break. But I realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want it to be temporary. I have severe ADHD and anxiety, as well as some health issues that just overall made school miserable for me. At least right now, I’m much more fulfilled and happy with my work. I’m lucky enough to have gotten a good job (really good for someone my age) in an AMAZING work environment and I’m just much happier there.

So what does this have to do with my fics and my blog?

Well, two things. One- I have less time overall. To be honest, a LOT of my works were written while I was spacing out in class. With my job, I don’t have the time or really any reason to space out at my desk- and that really is a good thing! Because secondly, writing was as much a coping mechanism as it was a hobby. When I was posting and writing regularly, a lot of it was pure avoidance. I could stave off my stress by pretending I was being productive when I wrote a new chapter, and I could avoid paying attention to class by researching for my character’s outfits, you know? It made it easier. It was also (depressingly) one of the few places where I could get real positive feedback and praise, which I DESPERATELY needed, but never got (as I was admittedly a terrible student). So I did as much as possible in order to garner pretty much any positive attention. And I am grateful that in those times, I had writing to cope- but I’m also glad that I don’t have to rely on it as much anymore, because it ultimately wasn’t healthy.

Where does this leave me?

I don’t write all this to announce the closing of my account. I promise, this is not me saying goodbye. However, I’m going to be learning how to truly embrace writing as a hobby and how to fit it into my new lifestyle. With that, I’ll be trying to work on more of my original content, which I post separately. I'll also be adjusting my plans for some of my fics. Here’s the list of what I’m planning on going forward.

The Raven House

The Raven House is my most popular work and absolutely one of my favorites. It also takes AGES to write, especially with me having shifted hyper fixations. I won't be pausing or stopping work on it all, but it will continue to take ages. TL;DR: It's not going away, but it'll continue to take a long time and have a very uneven upload schedule. I hope y'all will understand and keep going.

Multimedia

This piece will be discontinued. Honestly, I just have no idea where to go with it and there's not much point in me keeping it going. I think it's a fun concept, but I don't really want to continue it at this time.

Insomnia

Similar to Multimedia, it's a fun concept, but I don't have any ideas or motivation to push forward with it.

Blank Space

This will stay as a one-shot for now. I originally wrote this with plans to have it as a three chapter story, but I'd rather focus my motivation on The Raven House.

Shades Of Lavender

For lack of a better word, I'm considering this piece to be on hiatus. I don't want to say goodbye to this piece or these characters by any means- however it's another that will continue to take AGES. I'll work on it on the side, but I won't be posting it for the foreseeable future.

Purgatory

I'm wrapping up the last pages of this fic! However I'm still deciding if I can really wrap this up with one more chapter.

That's...pretty much all I had to say. I feel like I'm forgetting something. I'll remember later.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to my readers who see this. I understand if you left, but I'm doubly grateful for the ones who stuck around <3

[wolfstarmie]

Character Thoughts

Since my fic is a year old, I figured it'd be fun to just ramble about my silly fish, their origins in the story and how they have changed from initial ideas.

Stroganoff

When I first thought about this fic, I knew I wanted to make the main character/salmonid parent be a Big Shot. Big Shots are just my favourite salmonid boss (they’re hug shaped!) so I figured it’d be fun to write from that perspective.

Originally he wasn’t related to Sprout, but with time it was something that just made sense, as with the rest of the backstory that got out of control real fast.

When it comes to his design, parts of his unique charm are purely because I designed him before I fully understood how salmonid anatomy worked. Hence his adorable OwO face. Then there’s his red hair. This is because I suffer from having amazing taste in men, and most (if not all) my fanfics feature ginger men in some form or another, and so… well I gotta carry tradition >:U

Cookie

Poor Cookie. When I first posted the fic to AO3, folks were already alarmed at the major character death tag. I’m not sure how early her death was planned, but I believe it was about as soon as the concept of the fic itself. The official lore that salmonids don't fear death is super fascinating to me, and it felt natural to explore it by contrasting two extremes: A lack of care about death itself, and the grief one feels for a parent.

As for Cookie herself, she was always a motherly figure, though I can’t recall when I made her a goldie. Though out of all the salmonids, the special boss that hoards a billion eggs would make the most sense as a mother figure. 

Another point of contrast Cookie brought with her was her justified hatred of inklings. In many ways, she's the very opposite of Sprout: They both share aggressive views on inklings, but where Sprout embodies the negatives of those views, Cookie learned to overcome her own pain at what inklings did to her, and love Ravioli for just being herself.

While Cookie and Horn were destined to never meet, I did have thoughts of how Horn would learn of the previous owner of her home. One idea was that of Cookie’s ghost protecting the young woman during spawning, though that never came to be.

Speaking of Cookie in spirit, one little fun thing that I think is worth sharing is Cookie’s full title. The Great Kind Mother, Cookie Of a Thousand Winds. I personally hate the wind, but it sure does come up a bit during the fic…

Vanilla

Vanilla was not always planned on being an important character! In fact, while he was the first choice in the fic for where Stroganoff got ink; in the first draft, Stroganoff fought an inkling for ink before realising it wasn’t good enough for his new baby. 

A cut joke from that forbidden draft had Stroganoff eating some ink (for the greater good), and Vanilla having some great advice: “Why is your mouth blue?”

“I ate some ink. Will you help me?” “Have you tried not eating ink?”

In earlier plans, he was just a one sided villain, who potentially helped Sprout and maybe grew a conscience afterwards. I can tell you the exact chapter where this all changed, however: Chapter 12. In the original draft, he was downright mean to Cookie. In an attempt to tone it down and still have him be a bastard, I gave Cookie a way to fight back: being his mom. And then everything went pear shaped after that. I got attached to him, and he started turning out WAY different than originally planned.

(Still a lovable bastard though)

He’s also a manlet. I forget when this was decided, but he’s in the ballpark between 4 foot and 5 foot. One day Ravioli will be taller than him, and it will not be a good day for him.

Horn

Ah, Horn. She was always destined to be a punching bag for Ravioli after Cookie’s passing, but was wildly different for a while. The original plan had Horn be a male scrapper, bond with Stroganoff over machinery, and build a scrapper car with him.

There’s a very deep and meaningful reason for why I chose a scrapper and not any other boss: Whenever I’m playing salmon run and going over to the big shot cannon, there's always a scrapper there. Always. I can’t murder giant fish in peace without nearly being the victim of vehicular manslaughter.

Horn’s original name was Oepsie (a very sweet skewer made with bacon, and yes it does just mean ‘Oops’), and Ravioli would have been more than happy to call this poor salmon a mistake for living in Cookie’s house.

Continuing on the theme of names, another name Horn had for a while before I settled on ‘Caramel Horn’ was Cherry! I forget why the name (probably another terrible joke), but I eventually decided I didn’t like Cherry, and instead went with Horn (which IS another terrible joke).

She didn’t have a damaged tail originally, though there was a point in which she did have both the prosthetic and a desire to make her own scrapper car. At some point I just didn’t like the idea and scrapped (heh) it.

Unlike a few other characters, the first bit of designs for Horn were done digitally, so I can actually share 'em

Sprout

He’s always been a bastard. Much like milk, he got worse the more I thought about him. If there was ever a person to say “the world would be a better place without you,” it’d be Sprout. 

I cannot recall when I made Sprout and Stroganoff brothers, as it was not the original plan, but it's one of those things where the more you figure out characters, the more things slide into place.

Sadly all the information that would be worth sharing is better revealed in the fic, but please know Sprout is the type of person who’d have an overly dramatic villain song in a musical, and takes childish insults way too seriously.

The first drawing I did of this bastard was of him wielding a zweihander. Whether or not he should have a zweihander is up for debate.

Potato

He’s trying his best. While a very minor character, he’s definitely the kind of person Ravioli needs in her life: A friend. Maybe not the highest quality friend, his own ideas clashing with Ravioli’s sheltered upbringing, but at least it's someone Ravioli’s age.

His heart’s in the right place, but he’s a very unlucky kid when it comes to showing Ravioli cool stuff.

Fun fact! I named my palafin in pokemon violet after him, and he was my lead for most of the game. Maybe not the most thrilling fact, but I figured it was worth sharing how, in another life, Potato got to be a dolphin.

Ravioli

Ravioli… poor girl. There’s so much to say and at the same time, there isn’t much to say at all. There’s no secret about her on the cutting room floor, no devious plans that had to go to the wayside. She’s just a young girl (perhaps not the naturally brightest) trying to figure things out in a chaotic world trying so hard not to put her on a dinner plate.

All I can really share is that there have been many thoughts on how Ravioli would one day come into contact with other inklings, or at the very least octolings, and none of them have worked out in a way that makes sense for the story.

She yearns to learn about her own kind, but is destined to be alone. 

Also anytime I reread my own writing and get reminded of this child's... suboptimal choices, I just sigh.

[lord-jen-grey]

Thanks for the question @dianaforever .

The answer is Yes! It’s on the more rare side, but it does happen. Off the top of my head, I’ve had major plot shifts while writing on about 6 occasions (out of 28 Outlander works on AO3). I’ll detail them below if you’re interested.

Most of my plots are so intricate, I can’t mess with them after I started posting because it would ruin the groundwork already laid down. But sometimes it’s inevitable.

I think you’ll see a pattern that most of these changes are character driven. I have a framework of who my faves are at their essence, and if my plans don’t fit that as well as I hoped, I end up having to change the story to what Jamie & Claire (and John) demand it to be.

It’s notable for me that I have plot, relationship, and character development outlined, but I do leave myself creative flexibility with how that plays out. Dialogue is usually pretty organic and not planned ahead.

Here are some examples of major changes to stories:

Journey of a Thousand Kisses - this story was meant to be fluffy sex when I first started writing it. I didn’t want much plot! But in writing ch 1, I had to explain Jamie’s scars, and I didn’t want to just repeat canon. So I had to ask myself, “What could I do to make it different?” At the same time, I was thinking about Pixar and Fleabag’s storytelling strategies, and decided on telling a story where it seemed like one thing 90% of the story, then BAM, here is an emotional punch that was set up from the beginning. So, I went back to the drawing board and outlined the plot as it sits today (all this was before posting the first chapter).

The Silver of Moonlight - The point of this story was that Claire was meant to be a source of love, support, and encouragement so that Jamie could finally accept his feelings for John, all the while recognizing her own love for John in the process. I had planned on Jamie being a bit more reluctant and for him to struggle even more with his internalized homophobia. When it got to the intimacy, it just felt right for Jamie be more decisive about the shift and not drag out his reluctance.

Fire Closest Kept - I wrote half this story before going back and making a massive change (thank God it wasn’t posted yet). The parts from Brianna’s POV were originally Willie’s parts! But I felt like Jamie needed to earn a Willie’s trust, and keeping him in the dark about their plans was contrary to that, so I changed a big chunk of the plot to make it Brianna.

On Our Lips, Begin & Tell - This was originally meant to be enemies to lovers, but the moment these two met, that was ruined 😂. Journey babes are madly in love immediately, no matter what iteration.

Lost in the Wind - There were 2 changes here. Bennet was supposed to show up a few chapters in, but I changed it to chapter 1 more impulsively. He was just too important to the plot to not be there from the beginning. The second is that Claire was supposed to be meaner to Jamie in the initial outline, but she wouldn’t let me write her that way. She was too insightful in seeing the contradictions of his behavior.

Like Petals Falling - This story had the more changes than anything I’ve ever written!! It was initially meant to be (idk) 15 chapters of a secret admirer fic, ending with a flash forward of them getting married 😂. It quickly turned into something more. The issue with this story was that the poetry elicited so much of my personal existential philosophy on life and pulled in many of my day to day experiences, so small moments became entire chapters full of significance (like the Mother’s Day chapter was written from my own emotional challenges in that day). Then when my grandmother was ill and dying, I began reading poetry about loss and life, setting Jamie down a path of grief with Brian. The story went from 15 chapters to 30 very quickly. Then 30 went to about 75 when I decided to expand the existential themes of the story to tell a lifelong journey of love between two people and their family and the Legacy they’ll leave behind. These were a few notes I jotted down shortly after losing my Nan 💙

[fateheartblog]

Welcome to Fateheart: The Extended Canon

I have now written enough Starless Sea mini-fics (all set in or around the same timeline as Fateheart: A Starless Seaquel) that they warrant having their own collected series - so here is the link to that.

None of these have substantially character-altering plot, but some of them are fun, some of them are lovely, and some of them might even venture into the territory of being well-written! (Looking at you, Asset of Loneliness, decidedly not looking at you, Hockey Kids)

I initially was just going to post extra bits of writing as headcanons on this blog, but then the headcanons I was jotting down in my notes app became full scenes, too big to just dump on tumblr, and then those scenes started to draw themselves together into stories. So now they're up on Ao3.

I am also working on two much longer stories - both Starless Sea fanfictions, both continuations of the Fateheart timeline - though neither will come close to Fateheart itself - in significance, quality, or length. But in the meantime I will post links to any Zachary/Dorian and Kat content on this blog, and they will appear on my Ao3 account in this collection.

If you're a fan of Erin Morgenstern's The Starless Sea and you're encountering this post, this blog, or these fanfics cold, then may I first point you towards the main fic itself:

Fateheart: A Starless Seaquel

(having said that none of the future stories will hold a candle to Fateheart, watch out for The Lotus Flowers. If I can get the damn thing where I want it, it will blow Fateheart out of the water. possibly.)

And if I never post anything again, just know it is because I have been forcibly subsumed into an amorphous, sentient dust-cloud in the Middle East, and not because I have decided to stop writing The Starless Sea fanfiction. Because that's not going to happen. Apparently ever.

To seeking x

-- Boogleboot

[asachuu]

Alright, BSD/AO3-related “confession” time, although this shouldn’t have really become a confession.

While my works over on AO3 are occasionally quite dark, the full extent of which is entirely subjective, yet still one I could describe as such objectively, I do sometimes try to water a lot of it down out of fear I’m starting to sound “edgy for the sake of it”, as nonsensical as I personally find that description. Though I’m aware the thought process goes against what I personally believe on these matters, I still don’t want anyone to look at anything I write and assume it’s nothing but a mindless pile of brutality treated without proper seriousness and/or something to exaggerate for “no real reason”, and I often find myself worrying whether or not it’ll come off as such, even though I understand each author has their own visions and motives, me included, and not everyone will assume those correctly, nor will people ever universally agree on them, enjoy the content or even have the willingness to accept the mere existence of art that isn’t pure or sanitized, therefore one shouldn’t feel anxious over this when nobody owes any sort of explanation or justification for their creations to strangers anyway, but…let’s just say I’m still trying to get past that. Unfortunately, I suppose spending too much time around audiences who consider going into any type of ever-so-slightly darker territory in one’s works as an act only terrible, cruel individuals would do may have had its long-lasting effects…but I digress.

There was one work which was initially meant to be entirely unfiltered, “uncensored”, if I should say so, and that work was meant to be what would eventually become both A Second Chance and No Retakes, given the two are merely two varying iterations of an alternate universe I wanted to create for the ship I’m writing about. I suppose it’s the third, never spoken about version of it, and although there are four to five total versions as of today, this one in particular had almost made it through, had I not completely washed everything I were to include away just a few days before I got to writing my “first” fic. In fact, it was precisely the fully clean version which became A Second Chance; the series is essentially only different in its beginning, past and subsequently the way said past would affect what was happening, yet the more general events stayed intact, unlike No Retakes which is still not being too truthful to its original introductory disclaimer as of the last update.

Now, I felt like I had to tidy this one up, and if I am to be honest, it was mainly thanks to my only “enthusiastic” audience at the time always focusing on any sadder element of my writing and pinpointing how much it ruined the whole work, which was…a rather demotivating experience, aside from all else I could say about it. Considering this was a work I would be posting publicly with the intention of actually having others see it and associate it with this chain of accounts instead of someone’s random throwaway I could just ditch at any time, and not only that, this would also be something of great personal importance to me, I didn’t want to discard what I assumed to be my only chance at making something I could look back and be satisfied with. There is certainly far more to this story, but all that is to say, I didn’t want— and frankly couldn’t even afford— this to be dismissed as someone’s “horrible” work with such “unnecessary cruelty” in it, or however else it would have been described.

Even after a long time, after I had started publishing far more “risky” things, such as my whole Rimlaine-related series, and detached myself as much as possible from an audience which would ultimately never find any enjoyment in what I actually wished to be creating and would only serve to bring me down or make me dislike my own content, there was one thing I didn’t change my mind on, and that was feeling as though I still wouldn’t have been able to write the original concept of the ChuuArt series/fic/etc. I had in mind, even after everything I had written by that point and even after many chapters of No Retakes. In fact, I changed my mind a mere four weeks ago, which is the only reason I’m writing this.

If you’ve never heard me describe what the original consisted of, I’ll have to slightly disappoint you this time as I definitely don’t have enough confidence to actually state what it could have been, but as is probably very obvious, it wasn’t for the faint-hearted. I feel as though it’s no exaggeration if I say it was far more dark than every single Rimlaine fic I have ever written combined. I don’t believe I ever considered it “unreasonable” or any other such descriptor, not even when I was too afraid to write it, though— in truth, I sincerely believe both A Second Chance and No Retakes are extremely unrealistic and don’t represent practically anything I had been envisioning. Right now, I’ve decided to see if it’s possible for me to rework the outlines for the latter as it’s obviously very far from done and nobody apart from me would know what the original was meant to be, steering it a little bit closer to its long-lost predecessors, but even if I do manage to pull this off, the concept has been lost from the very beginning, and nothing can replicate it unless I somehow wholeheartedly try to overwrite people’s memories.

Of course, not stating it directly doesn’t mean I can’t imply it, and I will have to, just for the sake of what I’m trying to get at. The initial premise was always having Arthur survive the events of Fifteen, that much is obvious, and while there is one other version of the AU in which he survives on his own accord without any interference from the Port Mafia, the rest of them did require him to fall into the organization’s hands. Now, here is where I feel like ASC/NR completely fail at being anyhow logical, and this has hit me more than ever recently, though I’ll explain why afterwards, despite being somewhat confident that you could figure it out even without my input from here.

Naturally, there is absolutely no reason for Arthur to have been entirely safe and intact until meeting Chuuya in any iteration (…maybe aside from that one exception, but I think you’ll get what I mean more specifically), and no horrible living conditions I place him in are even remotely comparable to what I believe an organization such as the Port Mafia would do to a traitor if he were to be kept alive for any reason instead of immediately assassinated, as implied in Fifteen. I will give off somewhat plot-important spoilers here for No Retakes, so please beware, but NR tries to give some flimsy reasoning for this as I seemed to have become more and more self-aware of it while writing the initial outlines— I thought that perhaps, if Arthur regained his memories and could have potentially held some valuable information about other organizations, it would have made sense to try and keep him alive and well, and while it would have definitely been more straightforward for any PM member to just…let’s say…“standard-mafia-procedure” the information out of him, nobody would have had any reason to do that if he’d either been completely unconscious or he forgot everything again, right…? And one more “spoiler”, although it’s been slightly hinted at in the fic itself already and I heavily regret giving it such little relevance— even that much didn’t sit right with me, so he doesn’t escape entirely unscathed, but nonetheless, all of it is extremely tame, in my opinion. (Spoilers end) It feels more like a last resort to attain more realism points which simply aren’t really there, or so I believe.

The original, however, went all-out with this “realism” I so speak of, and I’ll just say that every variation of this AU has a five year gap between Fifteen and its present at the very least, but in both I’ve written about so far, Arthur isn’t particularly conscious for any of those five or more years. In that version, for one reason or another that hasn’t been properly worked on before being discarded and turned into one of the newer ideas, he’d been reluctantly kept alive, but not a soul would have given him the luxury of just leaving him be for ages until he would have most likely rotted away like in ASC, or until he’d woken up again like in NR. I believe everyone can have their own interpretation of my words here as I don’t even know how I would type this out in the first place, but essentially, at that point, Chuuya wouldn’t have simply carried him away for the sake of it or been tasked to watch over him, it’d be more of him just outright saving whatever was left of his life. I’m sure that anything one could imagine here would also lead to an obvious difference between how this AU’s Arthur would act, as opposed to both AU versions of him currently existing, yet to write all that simply felt…wrong. Not wrong because it didn’t make sense and felt like a pointless gore fest— the complete opposite, actually, but wrong as in, according to my mind and my mind only, something “too dark for AO3” or the BSD fandom as a whole. I probably would have had the tendency to overdescribe it as well instead of letting the reader make up their own mind, which would have added onto that factor, and I was too worried to even dare venturing there. Some of it certainly also had to do with fearing I wouldn’t be able to pull it off as a more amateurish writer, but it wasn’t the main driving force.

Now, anyone could sit here and tell me that my reason was complete bullshit, and I can’t believe I’ve only arrived to this conclusion myself so late. What led me to it, you may ask? Simple— Bungou Stray Dogs itself.

I’ve drafted this very post those four weeks ago when I changed my thoughts on these matters and just edited it to make it fit recent events, but at the time of writing this initially, I was only on chapter 40 of re-reading the manga, and that has been enough to convince me none of my fics, not even the original AU I had in mind, are “too edgy” for anything to do with BSD (and AO3, of course, I think that site has seen it all). Though I firmly believe no such thing even needs some kind of “justification” to be written in the first place, as for my observation, all of my harsher ideas would still be reduced to mere dust if compared to that or the light novels. There is not a single thing I could have ever written that would have gone “too far” by my own anxiety-driven standards, and even if I genuinely took that entire concept and wrote it to the full extent I’ve had in my mind, it would only be dreaming of being on par with something like Atsushi’s backstory or Q’s treatment, both of which are basically at the mere start of the manga. If not that, it would absolutely pale in comparison to the entirety of Stormbringer, for example, and if one was to put it simply, the amount of missing limbs, dead bodies, torture, on-screen and described gore in this series would make my own concepts…I want to say laughable, but it’d actually make them just a tiny bit more BSD-worthy.

Nothing I’m writing feels like BSD itself from this perspective, and I understand that I’m writing fanfiction— I’m in a space where people don’t always want to match the mood and tone of the media they’re making their own spin on, and there is not a single thing out of place if I make any of my works more toned down, peaceful and whatnot, but at the same time, there will also be nothing out of place if I don’t. Honestly, this may be somewhat clear already, but I don’t want to write works which are fully sanitized, clean and light-hearted only, and while yes, I believe a couple of those exist on my page, those aren’t meant to be the majority as that was never my goal to begin with. I didn’t even have one at first, but when I both actually tried to think of one somewhere along the way and reflected on all my old drafts and notes, the answer I got was to make the opposite of what I look for while browsing AO3 myself, ironically— as I don’t usually spend my time reading much, not even on there, I only ever read short fics that I can go through in one sitting which don’t leave me thinking about anything surrounding them and I feel as though I’ve read them from their true beginning to their true end, with the plot being only what was in the 4000 or so words I skimmed through rather than something much different, something I’ve only looked through a window into, and, simply put for what I think is my case, something far more pretentious than that, of course. Hopefully, there is no need for me to clarify I clearly do enjoy the shorter, less complex fics and am in no way trying to devalue them, they’re just not what I personally would like to write myself— I would be delighted if someday, I could feel as though I have created something which has a full, proper story in itself, and additionally, seeing as it’s BSD fanfiction, absolutely not have this story be one in which you could almost believe all the characters are regular office workers with rather mild problems in their lives. The only thing which is closest to this, yet which still fails to meet the former criteria, is probably all to do with Rimlaine that I’ve written, but that was not the initial plan, and now I’m seeing that it didn’t really have to be this way.

Not that I regret it too much, seeing as I could fix this if I truly wanted to— No Retakes was mostly born out of late regrets after I’ve fallen in love with that version of the AU and spent months wishing I had worked on it from the very beginning instead of having a thousand separate worries about it, all before I realized there were more people encouraging me to write it than people who would have insinuated I’d already written a ChuuArt AU and another “similar” one wasn’t necessary anymore. I could undoubtedly go back and show everyone one more of the originals, the one which would have rivaled every single work of mine in terms of just how dark it would have been, but I’m not sure whether it’s my ongoing WIP or general exhaustion stopping me more here, aside from the fact that I simply don’t have that much of a desire to do it when I could still try and pray to salvage said WIP a little bit and find a middle ground that doesn’t require me to start another project I will inevitably have no time to work on without getting too worn down.

Anyhow, I suppose I’ll get to looking through the outlines again, perhaps cut out some chapters on the way if I can and hope not to add more by accident. For better or for worse, while the reason should have probably been a bit different, I’m glad to be a bit less willing to censor half my works now that I’ve at least realized what media I’ve actually been using this whole time, and I’m hoping it will have some impact going forward as I really want to write what I alone want to write, not what people who don’t even care about my works want to see me create.

[sinigangsta-ao3]

Thursday Thoughts: A contemplative moment...

In typical Nina fashion, posted a day late on a Friday lol...

I'm still struggling to wrap my head around the fact that it's already December... and, with the onset of this month, the fact that I'm quickly approaching eight months of writing and posting fanfic on AO3.

It has been quite a journey, admittedly, as I embarked on fic writing at this stage in my life. A lot of ups and downs. My first intentional foray into dealing with strange online personalities. Making and losing friends. But, most importantly, re-establishing a creative practice and rediscovering the joy of doing something purely selfish, for no other reason than to rejuvenate my soul.

I've shared before that this is something that I never thought I'd get back to doing. It is so interesting how, as I'm moving through my 30s and as I've grappled with a lot of societal pressures of being a mother, a wife, a working professional, a millennial, etc., I have just given fewer and fewer fucks about being cripplingly selfless. And how I am unabashedly and unapologetically deciding to take up more space, to protect more of what makes me happy and more energized.

That last part, especially, is so hard for me to embrace. There has been a slew of traumatic experiences I've had in my youth and young adulthood that have made it physically painful for me to do things simply because I want to do them.

But, God, after the initial pain and discomfort of taking those first steps of being selfish, it is also so energizing and freeing to make and do something for me. Full stop.

So, as I am wont to do at this time of the year, I'm feeling very introspective about my journey so far. I have a lot of gratitude for what I've produced and shared (Nearly 120k words! 12 works!). I have a lot of grief toward the pain that I've felt when I've had some unsavory interactions, the crippling insecurity when I felt like I wasn't doing enough. And I also have a lot of excitement about how I can continue to grow — as a writer, as a person — as I move into 2023 and continue writing and creating and telling stories.

There are some ideas that I'm excited to tackle when the new year starts. But, before we get to that stage, there are a few commitments that I'm making to myself. I think it's important for me to get these things done first so that I can continue writing with renewed vigor in the new year.

Commitment No. 1: By the end of the year, I will complete the following in-progress fics:

"house of the rising sun"

"straight/edge"

Commitment No. 2: By the end of the year, I will post the following new stories to my AO3:

"purgatorio"

"Gaudete"

Commitment No. 3: I will take a little hiatus in January.

I still plan to work on all my stories throughout the month — I particularly want to get back to working on "sins of our fathers." But I just want to relieve myself of the pressure of putting something out there for others.

Plus, January is my birthday month. I want to treat myself to a little creative retreat of sorts — returning to the little bubble of writing for myself, full stop.

I also just want to write a little note of thanks to everyone who has come along this journey with me so far. Even those with whom I no longer engage regularly. And especially those who still read what I write, who comment and leave me kudos, who send me anonymous asks, who keep me going when this feels a little solitary.

You all have been such special parts of this stage in my life. And I just have so much gratitude and love and appreciation for how you all have formed this experience.

Much love, now and always, Nina 💕