#I started this on june 14th and finally finished it like last night

[snailpilled-and-based]

My attempt at drawing like how I used to back in like 2017 but failing bc I can never draw like that ever again 😭

[bts-hyperfixation]

What do you think the boys would've done on their last nights with their significant others before joining the military?

Some of these are last nights, others are full days. Also only Taes has explicit smut mention, although most mention sex in some fashion

Please send me asks to keep me motivated while I'm off work! Thirsty thoughts, Most likely to, reactions, life updates, and general gibberish welcomed!!

Namjoon: 

I think Namjoon would've wanted a quiet night. He was probably stuck at work trying to finish plans on that Instagram account that's still posting and maybe fiddling with the album we know he started. But he would have tried his hardest to put it down and return home by nine to spend time with his loved one. His partner would be waiting for him with a simple takeaway on the table and maybe a TV show they had been watching together queued up. They'd stay cuddled on the couch for the longest time. They'd maybe fall around but not get anywhere (Something Namjoon regrets by day 3 in the barracks), maybe they intended to have sex one last time before he left but neither wanted to acknowledge it was actually the last time. He would talk about how this was ridiculous, it's not like they'd be 18 months without one another, just a couple of months at a time is all... And then he'd get sad and introspective. They'd fall asleep on the sofa because going to bed would bring their last night to an end and Namjoon doesn't want to willingly relinquish that time. 

Seokjin: 

I think he hired out a restaurant he and his partner like, maybe even their first date restaurant. The partner actually panicked that Jin was going to propose the night before he left and was ready to yell at him if he pulled out a ring. Jin sets up multiple proposal cliches throughout the evening giving his partner a heart attack each time while he acts nonchalant about it, pretending he doesn't know why they are getting worked up. This is stuff like a jewellery box on the table (It's a necklace), A gem in the champagne (It's tiny ice), He kneels by the table (and ties his shoe). They take a long walk by the river after dinner, his partner increasingly exasperated but still very fond. He finally does pull out a ring, but he insists it's only a promise ring and the real ring will be given to them on June 14th 2024 (Doesn't want to share the anniversary). The evening probably ended with some very slow, heavy eye-contact, love-making

Yoongi:

Disclaimer - I'm not 100% sure if Yoongi had to go anywhere for any length of time... but this is written as if he were doing the same as the other boys. 

He cooked dinner, something he is gonna claim is simple, but he took all day to make it. He also lay the table with a white tablecloth, dimmed all the lights and set out candles. Flower petals lead you through different stations of the apartment. First appetizers and cocktails on the sofa so his partner can talk about their day, then to the table for the main course, to the bathroom where bubbly and strawberries await next to a warm bath for two, and finally to bed for dessert. Which actually meant dessert, there's a snack platter of sweets in the centre of the bedspread and a movie queued up on the TV. the movie wasn't really watched... but the thought was there.

Hoseok: 

I feel like Hobi made an entire day out of it, he set aside time to make sure he only had his significant other to focus on and made sure his SO did the same so they were uninterrupted. Then he locked them into their apartment, only opening the door to bring in food deliveries. The day starts with lazy morning sex. Then breakfast. Then lazy shower sex. Then maybe some TV time, where his hands remain firmly on his partner as if they are going to disappear the second he lets them go. The SO convinces him to go for a walk at lunchtime, they hold hands the entire time. Hoseok has them sit in his lap when they return home. Just wants to be permanently close. The third round of sex is definitely more driven, like he has a point to prove and doesn't want his SO to forget what exactly it is they are going to be waiting so patiently for. 

Jimin: 

Jimin took his SO back to his home town a couple of days before. Maybe spent some time with his family in Busan, had a very nostalgic craving for his parents cooking and took his SO along for the ride. They do stuff he liked to do as a kid, visiting places that he wouldn't be easily recognised. He's anxious, and jumpy, and clingy a lot of the time. He keeps asking his partner if they are going to be okay when really it's his own insecurity. Jimin had someone drive them in a nice car back to Seoul in the early afternoon so they had the evening together, they probably fooled around in the car as he tried to keep himself occupied. He let them hold his hand while he had his head shaved, needing the familiar reassurance. He took a break to show Army his hair, but the SO is hiding behind the camera. Then the evening is spent quietly, wrapped together to enforce the fact that they aren't going anywhere.

Taehyung: 

He came up with so many different plans for what he wanted to do that by the time the day came around he hadn't actually implemented any of them. And sure he is Taehyung of BTS, if he had made a couple last minute phonecalls he could have made anything happen but he decides the lack of plans is exactly what was meant to be. He runs on pure unplanned whims and ends up taking his SO to absolutely anywhere that pops into his mind in the most chaotic fashion. They go to the movies (Something everyone's already seen so no one else is there) (they may spend most of it making out in the back). They go to an arcade (An old buddy of Tae's owns it and makes sure they get an hour uninterrupted). They eat lunch at the SO's favourite restaurant. Eventually, they go home and Taehyung spends hours between his lover's thighs, trying to immortalise the taste of them in his brain before he no longer has the access he so desperately craves. They probably also have a lot of sex. He falls asleep insisting on cockwarming, convincing his partner the UTI will be worth it with the Tata mic face. 

Jungkook:

It takes a while for his SO to convince him to do anything at all because "What's wrong with in my arms in my bed forever?" (And he's right, nothing wrong with that and if his SO don't want it I volunteer). He convinced them to snuggle back down with him at least three times until lunch rolled around and they insisted he get up with them to go somewhere. They never end up leaving the house. Every time his SO goes to put on a shirt, Jungkook grabs it and throws it somewhere it can't be easily recovered. There was one in the sink with the dirty dishes, one mixed with the already dirty laundry, and another hanging from a light fixture they would both need a ladder to reach. Eventually, the SO has to relent because they won't have any shirts to say goodbye in the following day. So they succumb to his wishes (Although they make him go out to fetch food first). He holds on to them possessively throughout the day, pulling as much of them against him as is reasonable at any given time. I fully believe Jungkook would crawl into the skin of an SO if he thought it was possible. 

[definedbydaylight]

“It’ll Be The Last Time” - Matty Healy x F!Reader

Part 1:

Masterlist: .°˖✧ Word Count: 1575 Warnings: honestly don't really know what to put? smoking i guess? arguing? idk

Series Summary: “You’ve known Matty since you were 14 and the boy has never failed to get on your last nerve, but over the years you two end up having unexplainable moments where you can’t help but feel you two are connected in a way you’ll never feel with anyone else, until one night he tells you something that may change how you view the boy forever…”

Late Summer 2010:

"I'm in love with you."

You want to scream at him. You want to hit him, you'd use being scared as your excuse for not doing so, but you know that's not true, he'd never do anything to hurt you.

At least not physically.

"Don't." Is the only word that your mouth can make out.

"June Bug please..." It's been months since he'd last called you that, months since he's last called you anything at all.

2003-2005:

You first met Matty at your best friends 14th birthday party, he had tagged along with Ross who the birthday girl had been going out with for the last few months, well if you count awkward glances in school halls and AOL chat messages as going out, but they were only in year 9 cut them some slack.

Kelsey has been your best mate since you were 4, met in daycare and haven't left each others side since, people often joked that you two were joined at the hip. Ross greets her with a hug and not even blackout curtains could hide the bright red blush that took over your friend's whole face, afterwards Matty steps forward and introduces himself to you both, even at 14 he exuded a cocky self-confidence that put you off immediately. To say you and Matty didn't get along would be an understatement, being Kelsey's best friend had gotten you roped into Ross's friend group against your own will. You adored Ross obviously, grateful for the way he treated your friend so well, Adam was always quiet but kind and unbelievably hilarious at times, you'd always fancied George a little bit, thought he was quite fit and was nothing short of amazing with you... Matty on the other hand was a whole 'nother story.

Matty was always getting on your nerves, you served one purpose to him, to be the main target of his relentless teasing and rude comments. From ages 14-16 you were convinced Matty genuinely hated you, and you hated him right back. It wasn't until George asked you to a school dance in year 11 that you started to see a different side to Matty. The whole week leading up to the dance Matty had been unusually reserved with his snide comments, silence filled the gaps after you spoke when you know he'd usually tease you. At first you'd thought George might have finally told him to lay off a little, which seemed like it'd be a nice sentiment, but you found yourself oddly missing the only version of Matty that you'd ever known.

You knew Matty and you had always been eerily similar in certain ways, you both found solace in song writing and had a penchant for smoking.

The day of the dance had come and all of the boys were waiting downstairs in Kelsey's living room whilst she and you finished getting ready in her room, you thought your best friend couldn't look more beautiful. She wore a long red satin dress and had her hair pulled into a perfectly messy side braid, she had opted to go greet the boys whilst you finished up. You checked yourself in the mirror after she left, Kelsey had done your hair in big loose curls and you'd picked out a strapless iridescent green dress, you touched up your lipstick one last time before grabbing your clutch and exiting her room. As you descended down the stairs both George and Matty stopped their conversation and watched you in silence, you reached the ground floor and stopped right before George, looking up at him shyly.

"You look stunning." Your date was the first to speak up, you smile as you feel your cheeks flush.

"You look like a June Bug." Matty scoffs eyeing you up and down, you shoot him a glare and Adam smacks him up the backside of his head.

You all make your way out to Matty's van, George's hand never left your waist and you swear you could physically feel the heat on you skin from Matty's stare. The dance was as good as a school dance could be, you danced with George for the first while before excusing yourself for a moment, you'd never really liked to be in the middle of large crowds and you could feel the need for a smoke growing since you'd entered the hall. You walk out to your usual smoke spot only to find someone else occupying the space, you sigh.

"Fuck me." You say to yourself.

"Don't sound too excited to see me June Bug." Matty quips sarcastically, a fag hanging from his lips.

You lean against the brick wall beside him, pulling out your own smokes from the small clutch you'd brought with you and lighting one up before you spoke again.

"Weirdly nice to see you're back to your usual asshole demeanor." You laugh, taking another drag.

"What you on about?" He asks, turning to look at you.

"Nothing really, you've just been uncomfortably quiet around me this past week." You say not turning to him quite yet as you bring the fag back up to your lips.

"Don't know what you're talking about." He turns away from you and it's now that you look at him.

"Thought George might have told you off about it." You laugh again, a breeze blows past as he looks at you again through the smoke in your eyes.

"And you think George cares enough about you to do that?" It's his turn to laugh. "Thinks he'll get a good shag out of you that's for sure though."

His eyes meet yours and he can practically see the gears turning in your head as you process his comment.

"You don't know shit Matthew." You know how much he hates the use of his full name so you make sure to emphasize it.

"Actually I know everything dear, he's my best mate so if we're having a battle of who knows George's intentions best," He pauses, taking another drag. "I win." He finishes with a smirk.

"Jesus Christ! You've always got to be the biggest wanker don't you?" You roll your eyes at him. "Lord forbid a boy actually like me right?"

"Just telling you the truth love." He leans in close to you as he speaks, a twinkle of something you can't quite place in his eyes, his breath smells like a mixture of smoke and Apple Sourz.

"Fuck you, like genuinely go fuck yourself." You begin to walk away but he grabs your wrist to stop you.

"Hey! I'm not the one you should be saying that to right now, I'm just looking out for you here." Matty tries to defend himself.

"Looking out for me? Shitting on your best mate? You really expect me to believe that bullshit after the way you've treated me these past 2 years?!" You're proper mad now.

"I am always looking out for you!" He yells back.

You laugh in his face. "Name one fucking time you've had my best interest in mind Matthew, please enlighten me!"

His stare is cold and unnerving. "Last year at Josh's Halloween party I found you pasted out in the spare room with Will Evans attempting to undress you." He pauses to take a breath, the air thick with tension after he spoke. "Ripped him off of you and gave him a mean right hook without a second thought. Stayed by your side until I had sobered up enough to drive you and Kels back to her place."

You barely remember anything from that night past doing shots with Ross and waking up in Kelsey's bed with a killer migraine, Matty must have carried you all the way in and up the stairs.

"What?" You manage to choke out the one word.

"God you're so daft, just cause I'm an ass doesn't mean I don't care." You still at his words. "I've always cared about you June Bug." A small smirk crosses his lips.

"Oh god that's going to stick isn't it?" You let out a small laugh, still dwelling on the story he'd just told you.

Your eyes meet his again, both your smokes dropped and forgotten about on the ground.

"I thought you hated me." You confess quietly.

You feel his hand on your cheek before he speaks again. "I could never hate you y/n."

Before you can respond his lips are on yours... you should push him off, you should pull away and head back to George who you'd left waiting for you inside, George who is Matty's best mate. But there's something in the kiss that leaves you unable to think clearly, your hands reach for his neck as he deepens the kiss, his tongue slipping past your lips as you take a quick breath. You can't help but tug on the curls at the base of his neck, the slight moan he lets out in response is what finally snaps you out of your daze and back to reality. You pull away from him, your eyes wide staring at the boy before you, you blink a few times as the shock finally settles in. You pull away fully and begin to quickly walk away from him without another word, back into the dance... back to George.

"Y/N!" You hear him shout behind you, but you just keep walking with one thought raving through your mind.

Matty Healy just kissed you.

Part 2

a/n: well here's the first part of this story, i haven't put out a fully worded fanfic in years, i've def written them just haven't shared them with the public haha! well hope you enjoyed and didn't think this was too shit! loves xx

[charmspoint]

Full Foreword

(Context: I wrote a long foreword for dance with the devil but AO3 nerfed me so I'm posting it here :3)

On 30th of June 2021 I published Rabid Dreams, Neon Lights and Your Teeth on My Tongue. It was supposed to be a one shot for an exchange, one that I at first struggled to write, before suddenly managing to find my stride. And what I wrote ended up capturing my imagination so intensely and viciously that on the night I posted it, I started planning the first prequel.

It’s now 14th of June 2024.

Three years later and we are finally here.

In many ways, this fic is my child. I truly think it’s some of the best writing I’ve ever done and certainly the best, most in depth character study I’ve ever done. This fic technically has two iterations, because when I first started writing it, it was supposed to be a 10k oneshot...then a 20k oneshot...then a 70k oneshot. Faced with such a big number, I couldn’t in my right mind post it all together and expect people to read 70k incessant words of a deep au (without a ship dynamic!) so I set to separating it into chapters. To separate it into chapters each previous section of the oneshot had to be rounded into a story that could stand as a chapter, and then of course there were some things I ended up not liking about certain arcs so I changed them, expanded them, shifted the character roles around, gave certain characters more screen time and more impact and well...you can expect to read about 101k words once this fic is fully finished. Just of this. Just of the prequel from Satoru’s POV. It’s hands down the biggest thing I’ve ever written and the big word count is one of the reasons this took so long. The other reason is that I wanted to have a weekly posting schedule. Currently, all chapters save from last two have been fully written, beta read and edited. I’m confident I can give you a regular posting schedule every Friday around this time.

Now for some dedications.

Firstly, this fic is dedicated to Sesshom0ru, who originated the initial prompt that fired off the oneshot and then this fic right after it. Thank you for patiently waiting for the prequel that was promised to you three years ago lmao!

Secondly, this fic is dedicated to Frappe. I met Frappe when she did art for CotA and we became very good friends, so much so that she was quickly wrapped up into the production of this fic. Frappe was going to draw the cover for this fic as well as spot art for each chapter. We were both very excited about it and talked about it constantly and some of that art, especially the cover which is completely stunning, does exist. But unfortunately, Frappe fell out of contact almost two years ago. I don’t know what happened to her but I hope it’s nothing bad. I hope life was just life and she got carried away with it, I still hope I see her discord avatar pop up in my dms again. Out of respect for Frappe I won’t be posting any of the art she had made for the fic, but this fic is still dedicated to her and I hope that one day she still gets to read it. This is for you Frappe, thank you for loving my boys as much as I did <3.

Thirdly, and most importantly, this fic is dedicated to Ker, my beta reader. If there are readers here who had read multiple of my fics, they are probably familiar with Ker’s name. Ker beta reads most of my big projects and most of the little ones that I think are really good. The reason you might have been seeing less of their name pop up in current projects is because I had them sat and beta reading 18 chapters for this crazy fic. And they did such a wonderful job with it too. I honestly couldn’t ask for a better beta reader if I tried, couldn’t find one if I searched the whole internet for them. Ker brings such incredible love and attention to detail to beta reading and editing my fics. I’ve had a fair number of people edit my fics, but only Ker does it with such care and attentiveness. I often say, me and Ker, we are coparents of this fic. It’s theirs as much as it’s mine. They not only beta read it, but also listened to my endless rants about it, encouraged me when I had doubts and cheered me on when I did something well. They don’t just point out grammar mistakes, they carefully go through the chapter and point out where things don’t flow well, when scenes should be expanded, when things should be better explained. They also react with a lot of baby emojis to Satoru’s antics. I have taken to referring to Satoru as Ker’s son whenever he’s doing something stupid. I cannot overstate how much Ker does and has done for this fic. They truly, honestly make me a better writer, not content with just correcting my grammar and then patting my back, but constantly challenging me to do better, to develop more, to surprise them again. I cannot overstate how important Ker is to my writing process and to me personally. This is why this might sound like someone endlessly gushing about their spouse, lmao. But they do deserve it. They stuck with my crazy, violent little story from beginning to the end and are already at the next starting line, eager for more. Ker is the best beta reader I could ask for, my loudest cheerleader and my most beloved. Thank you darling, for being you, you’re irreplaceable to me <3

It might seem silly to have such a long starting note on a silly little gang au fic of a manga that has almost run its course. But this fic took three years to make. A lot of love was put into it, a lot of energy and effort. I hope you all enjoy it and love it as much I do.

[old-childhood-drama]

Taylor Swift and Joe Jonas Masterpost (Toe/Jaylor)

Before dating (May 2008)

We start with the Taylor lookalike

In May 2008 the Jonas Brothers are filming their music video for Burnin’ Up [x]. Joe’s love interest in it is played by a blonde girl who looks quite a bit (and she’s also styled) like Taylor Swift, for reference, this is the music video that has Selena Gomez as Nick Jonas’ love interest.

As far as we know they hadn’t even met so we don’t know exactly what this was supposed to mean, maybe Joe had a crush on Taylor or maybe it’s a coincidence.

We do know that Nick and Selena were dating when this was filmed and that by the time the MV was released (July 4th, 2008) Joe and Taylor were officially dating.

Toe is alive! (July 2008 – September 2008)

On Tour

Fans claim to have seen Taylor around the tour in early July, which matches with Taylor’s lyrics in "Last Kiss".

Last Kiss. Taylor Swift.

I do recall now the smell of the rain

Fresh on the pavement, I ran off the plane

That July 9th, the beat of your heart

It jumps through your shirt

On July 14th, Taylor and The Jonas Brothers perform “Should’ve Said No”[x] from her debut album, and this performance now forever exists in their 3D movie (a classic), a cute fact is that some fans have said that Taylor tripped when she first came out, so they had to repeat it for the movie.

On July 20th Joe flies to Wyoming to watch Taylor opening up for Rascal Flatts, and they flew back and she was spotted at the Omaha show.

She’s seen in a couple shows more and she joins the stage again for their Madison Square Garden shows in August [x]. They sing “Even now just looking at you feels wrong”.

They’re together but they’re not together.

For more context, we must remember that Taylor was a very new artist from a small label and The Jonas were pretty much at their peak and Disney’s biggest act, and they were managed like crazy and could never even think about being seen with someone in a romantic way. Any rumors were denied so fast, and Disney did the absolute most to keep it secret. So according to everyone they were just good friends, at the time both Taylor and Selena were annoyed by all the secrecy.

Now back to the timeline:

Taylor is backstage of the tour A LOT for the next couple of weeks right next to the other not-girlfriends Selena and Danielle.

She films a cameo for the “Love Is on Its Way” [x] video for the concert in New York. She was said to be only interested in hanging out with Joe and they were seen hugging *gasp* I know it doesn’t seem like much now but back then this was the hottest gossip and again the Jonas were not supposed to breathe near any human of the opposite gender.

Taylor and the Jonas were staying at the same hotel a bunch of rumors ensued, but I will not talk about the whole Olympics and Toe locking themselves in a room at midnight thing. If it’s real, we really needed to touch some grass and stop staying outside of people's rooms all night.

On August 17th Joe goes to Ryan Seacrest's show and denied that Taylor is his girlfriend in the best way a corporation like Disney can train you to deny something that’s true. Saying Taylor is “a great girl and I think anybody would be lucky to date her. I think anybody would love to go on a date with her.”

And Taylor tells People Magazine “He’s an amazing guy and anybody would be lucky to be dating him” Cinematic parallels.

Taylor is spotted in the back (in a mirror) of one of the Jonas youtube videos [x]. Basically, we all knew they were together.

The Central Park date (August 28th)

Now if you were a fan of either the Jonas Brothers, Selena, or Taylor you know this next part and it the iconic triple date of Central Park.

Again, this is kind of famous at this point and Selena has been quoted saying how awful it was because the boys were not allowed to be seen with them so they all went to Central Park (Selena’s first time in Central Park) and Taylor and Selena walked about 20 feet of distance from the guys so nobody would think they were together but we all already knew because it wasn’t like they were that good at hiding it and there are pictures of them together that night (the clownery of it all).

These backstage tour adventures are the reason Taylor and Selena are friends today and in Selena’s own words the best thing to come out of those relationships.

VMAs (September 2008)

With how many pictures of them together that night [x] [x] [x] exist you would think they had gone together as a couple but no just two besties! The 2008 VMAs are so the show where Russell Brand mocks the Jonas Brothers and their purity rings and Taylor publicly defends them.

Toe seems happy for the rest of September but as we know now the end is near.

The Break-Up (October 2008)

Social Media was different back then and Taylor did what every teen girl with a broken heart did in 2008 and she went to myspace with an edited post to make a statement about the Toe current situation.

Post-Breakup

The 27 seconds Joe Jonas will regret for the rest of his life.

Taylor went on Ellen and I don’t even think I need to say much this interview is THAT iconic she sat on that couch and told the world exactly how Joe had broken her heart in the following two quotes:

“There’s one that’s about that guy, but…that guy’s not in my life anymore unfortunately. That guy…that’s an ouch.”

“I’m not even gonna be able to remember the boy who broke up with me over the phone in 25 seconds when I was 18…it was like 27 seconds, that’s got to be a record.” [x]

She also went on Ryan Seacrest’s and when asked about the perfect guy she saw an opportunity and took it, saying “I used to always say sense of humor, but I think that it’s important to have the same kind of sense of humor. I have a really dry, sarcastic sense of humor and if somebody doesn’t think that my sense of humor is funny, then that’s not something that is good. Um, so sometimes you know, that can be a wrong match. If they’re not allowed to go in public with me, that’s sort of an issue too.” [x]

Bonus the amazing youtube video Taylor posted with Joe’s Camp Rock doll and how he comes with his own phone to break up with other dolls [x]. Taylor eventually went full out and cited Camilla Belle (then girlfriend of Joe) as the reason for the breakup. And you know someone at Disney’s PR office wanted to die when this was going down.

So finally, Joe was forced to acknowledge the whole situation with a Myspace post:

"I never cheated on a girlfriend. It might make someone feel better to assume or imply I have been unfaithful, but it is simply not true. Maybe there were reasons for a breakup. Maybe the heart moved on. Perhaps feelings changed. I am truly saddened that anything would potentially cause you to think less of me. For those who have expressed concern over the "27 second” phone call. I called to discuss feelings with the other person. Those feelings were obviously not well received. I did not end the conversation. Someone else did. Phone calls can only last as long as the person on the other end of the line is willing to talk. “

Forever & Always

Now this song is known as THE Toe song and it was born out of the end of the relationship when she felt Joe was getting distant, but she couldn’t do anything to help it, it was made really late into the production of Fearless so she had to rush to finish it in time (so no other breakup songs are about Joe in the original album).

Forever & Always Was I out of line? Did I say something way too honest, made you run and hide Like a scared little boy I looked into your eyes Thought I knew you for a minute, now I’m not so sure

In the 2009 Grammy's Taylor and Miley (insert The Ex-Girlfriends Club Theory here) performed Fifteen (obviously not about Joe) and the Jonas were in the audience. I believe this is probably around the time Taylor writes Mr. Perfectly Fine and You All Over Me, which we know get to have thanks to Fearless (Taylor’s Version) 13 years later.

You All Over Me

The best and worst day of June

Was the one that I met you

With your hands in your pockets

And your 'don't you wish you had me' grin

But I did, so I smiled, and I melted like a child

Now every breath of air I breathe reminds me of then

Mr. Perfectly Fine

'Cause I hear he's got his arm 'round a brand-new girl

I've been pickin' up my heart, he's been pickin' up her

And I never got past what you put me through

But it's wonderful to see that it never phased you

In November of 2009, she also goes to SNL and mocks Joe in her monologue. "You might think I'd bring up Joe That guy who broke up with me on the phone But I'm not gonna mention him *rolls eyes* In my monologue [Spoken:]Hey Joe, I'm doing real well, tonight I'm hosting SNL [Sings:]But I'm not gonna brag about that In my monologue [x]"

To make things even more dramatic and very awkward The Jonas Brothers, Demi Lovato, and Taylor Swift spent NYE together watching the ball drop on TV and this was probably not how they wanted to start their years. [x] [x] [x] and a video [x]

Now let’s discussed some of the songs that came out at the time. The Jonas response to Forever & Always was Much Better. Nick described it as a song that was very personal to Joe and Joe went on to say that it was based on his very interesting year. They also at some point wanted to pretend the song was about their love for their fans but come on. Joe also changed the lyrics from ‘superstar’ to ‘country star’ and later changed it to ‘movie stars’ when he broke up with Camilla who is the ‘Much Better’ girl from the song.

Much Better - Jonas Brothers

I get a rep for breakin’ hearts

Now I’m done with superstars

And all the tears on her guitar

I’m not bitter

But now I see

Everything I’d ever need

Is the girl in front of me

She’s much better

Taylor’s iconic response in Better Than Revenge seems to be more of an attack on Camilla. She’s spoken about her regret for this song since then and hasn’t played it in years and Camilla seems to be ok we never forgiving her for it [x] [x]. Regardless this song remains a staple of the genre ‘Feminism OFF, Bops ON’.

“I was 18 when I wrote [“Better Than Revenge.”] That’s the age you are when you think someone can actually take your boyfriend. Then you grow up and realize no one can take someone from you if they don’t want to leave”. - Taylor 2014.

Better Than Revenge - Taylor Swift

Let's hear the applause (Come on, come on)

Come on, show me how much better you are

(So much better, yeah?)

See you deserve some applause

'Cause you're so much better

She also released "Last Kiss" about the nicer part of their relationship, and some believe other songs such as If This Was a Movie, Haunted (Speak Now) and Jump Then Fall (Fearless) are about Joe. From the Jonas, the other song believed to be about Taylor is Paranoid (Lines, Vines and Trying Times).

Jump Then Fall

Well, I like the way your hair falls in your face

You got the keys to me

I love each freckle on your face, oh

I've never been so wrapped up, honey

Probably a song was written about and in the early days of their romance and the long hair freckles [x] thing definitely fits 2008 Joe.

If This Was a Movie

Baby, what about the ending?

Oh, I thought you'd be here by now

Thought you'd be here by now

According to some this song is a sister song to "Last Kiss" in the same album and that is confirmed to be about Joe.

Haunted

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this

I thought I had you figured out

Something's gone terribly wrong

Won't finish what you started

This song would be a sister to Forever & Always since Taylor described both to be about a relationship that was fading in the end and that she was confused as to how they got there in the first place.

"‘Haunted’ is about the moment that you realize the person you’re in love with is drifting and fading fast. And you don’t know what to do, but in that period of time, in that phase of love, where it’s fading out, time moves so slowly. Everything hinges on what that last text message said, and you’re realizing that he’s kind of falling out of love. That’s a really heartbreaking and tragic thing to go through because the whole time you’re trying to tell yourself it’s not happening. I went through this, and I ended up waking up in the middle of the night writing this song about it.” Taylor

Friendlier days are coming (2010- )

I guess time can heal a lot of wounds and Toe is seen hugging and on friendly terms at the Clive Davis party on January 31st of 2010 [x].

The world was so shocked when we realized that Joe went to see her perform in a couple of her shows in September 2011 [x] [x], and in here Holy Ground is born about her new evaluation of their former relationship rather than the bitterness of the breakup. The lyrics' secret message is “when you came to the show in SD” and the potential parallel to "Last Kiss".

Holy Ground - Taylor Swift

We blocked the noise with the sound of ‘I need you’

And for the first time I had something to lose

And I guess we fell apart in the usual way

And the story’s got dust on every page

But sometimes I wonder how you think about it now

And I see your face in every crowd…

… Tonight, I'm gonna dance

For all that we've been through

But I don't wanna dance

If I'm not dancing with you

Last Kiss - Taylor Swift

I do remember the swing of your step

The life of the party, you’re showing off again

And I roll my eyes and then

You pull me in

I’m not much for dancing

But for you I did

They're seen talking in the MTV's EMA's 2012 [x].

From here they seem to be friendly and in May of 2015 after the Billboards. They even go on a double date later that year with Gigi Hadid, Calvin Harris, and Karlie Kloss (this picture feels so cursed). Nick and Joe get invited to Taylor’s 4th of July party and they seem somewhat distant after his split from Gigi.

Present (2020- )

In 2020, we got the amazing surprise of folklore with the song ‘Invisible String’ that makes a reference to Taylor’s past songs about exes being harsh and how she sent Joe and his wife Sophie Turner a present for their baby girl’s birth. In 2021, she has now released the re-recordings of Fearless and we are all reliving the drama and enjoying the chaos of Taylor’s and Sophie’s friendship not letting Joe know peace for those 27 seconds over a decade ago.

Invisible String

Cold was the steel of my axe to grind

For the boys who broke my heart

Now I send their babies presents

[spine-buster]

The President Wears Prada (William Nylander) | Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks for all the positive feedback on last week’s double update!  I’d love to hear how you’re enjoying it and any canon questions you may have even though it’s very early into the story still!

September 13th, 2019

Aberdeen Bloom was absolutely fucking bricking it.  

These were the things she knew as an absolute certainty: William Nylander – she had learned his full name – was a Toronto Maple Leaf.  She had hooked up with him in June one week after her graduation from university.  He’d gone back to Sweden for the summer to be with his family.  Now he was back in Toronto because he played for the Toronto Maple Leafs.  And now, she worked as the executive assistant to the president of the Toronto Maple Leafs.

She had no clue how she got herself into this situation, no clue what she was going to do in this situation, and no clue how she was going to get out of this situation.

She was going to have to see him practically every fucking day.

Aberdeen knew she couldn’t let this get the best of her, her mind, or her emotions.  She was brought on board to do a job, and she was going to do that job to the best of her abilities.  No bullshit, no problem.  William wasn’t going to stand in her way of doing well and doing her job for Mr. Shanahan.  Regardless of how blue his eyes were.  Regardless of how blonde his hair was.  Regardless of how cute he looked.  Regardless of how hot he looked in a suit.  Regardless of how every time she looked at him, she began to remember how his hands felt on her hips and how his lips felts on her bare skin…

No.  Stop it.

By the end of the week, she’d met the entire team – Mr. Shanahan had ushered her into the locker room to introduce her to everyone and she waved shyly at all of them before they gave her polite nods and waves of their own.  She wondered if any of them recognized her from when she accidentally walked in on all of them topless and in their underwear.  They probably did.  Nobody recovered from something like that.  Throughout the week, many of them saw her in the hallways and came up to introduce themselves personally.  She thought that was nice.  Sometimes, she’d see William hanging out in the background, waiting for his teammate, but staring directly at her.  

Now came her first trip, one that she found out about on Wednesday – she was going to St. John’s, Newfoundland.  She was lucky Kasha was one of her best friends and agreed to watch and feed Minerva because she’d be gone for six days.  Leaving on Friday, coming back late Wednesday night, after the exhibition game in Ottawa.  It would be interesting, that’s for sure.  She’d never been to Newfoundland.

Lou drove her and Mr. Shanahan to Pearson Airport (Kyle Dubas had to stay back to negotiate a contract and sign someone, but he’d be there eventually too), where she was led to a private hangar.  Most of the team was already there, and a bunch of people Aberdeen didn’t recognize.  She noticed William in the crowd already staring at her as she walked in, a beanie lazily placed on top of his head.  He was sitting beside Kasperi, who was trying to show William something on his phone.  She tried to look away, but couldn’t.

“That’s media,” Brendan told her, finally breaking her concentration.  “They travel with us on road trips.”

“But this is only the start of training camp…” Aberdeen said, not quite understanding why they were already here if the season hadn’t even started yet.

Brendan chuckled from beside her.  “You’ve got a lot to learn about the sports media in Toronto…especially for the Leafs,” he commented.  

“Sorry,” she apologized for no good reason.

“That’s okay.  You’ve got a lot of time to learn.”

When everybody began to board, she began to gather all of the things she’d taken out of her bag while they waited.  She almost jumped out of her skin when somebody behind her asked, “Do you need help carrying your bag?”

She spun around and saw William behind her, watching her as she stuffed everything into her bag.  “No,” she said, turning back around because she couldn’t look at him.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

“There’s an entire team of big burley hockey players ready to help.”

“No thank you,” she said again, zipping it up and walking away.  

On the private jet, she learned about the seating hierarchy.  The team got the back of the plane; media and other team personnel at the front.  She learned that the seats were giant, only two to a row, and she got her own row – a window seat right behind Mr. Shanahan.  She learned about the impeccable catering on board and the menu provided for them.  She learned that everybody was more relaxed on the charter flight – even the team, as they let loose and began to play cards, loosening their ties and taking off their suit jackets.  

She learned that every time she stood up or looked behind her, William was almost always already looking at her.  

***

September 14th, 2019

Practices were not usually watched by the general public, but because NHL hockey came to Newfoundland so rarely, tickets were sold to watch the Toronto Maple Leafs practice.  The arena was full, and before the boys stepped out onto the ice, Aberdeen had to coordinate Mr. Shanahan completing some media interviews for local news stations before they were able to retire from that and actually watch the practice.  They sat together, looking out onto the rink as Aberdeen had her iPad in her lap to co-ordinate a few more media interviews after the practice was done.  

“Sir, can I ask you a question?” she asked.  

“Brendan,” her corrected her.  She still felt uncomfortable about calling him that, so she wasn’t going to.  “Shoot.”

“The drill they’re doing right now.  What’s it called?”

Brendan looked at her briefly, smiling slightly.  “It’s to practice backchecking.”

She nodded her head.  “What’s a backcheck?” she asked, feeling stupid.  All of these terms were like a foreign language to her.  She didn’t know how people spoke using these words in coherent sentences.

“Backchecking is when the other team has the puck, and we need to rush back to the defensive zone to stop their attack,” Brendan explained.

“So…it’s trying to stop the other team from scoring.”

Brendan smiled again, wider this time.  “You’re learning.”

“I figured I should learn about the sport I’m going to be surrounded by,” she shrugged her shoulders.  “So that must mean the forecheck is attacking…trying to score.”

“Exactly.”

“Who are our best goal scorers?”

Brendan considered her question.  He knew he could answer it in many different ways.  “Well, if we’re talking about pure numbers, John Tavares – last season he scored forty-seven goals.  Anything above fifty is, like, at the super-elite level.  But then there’s Auston Matthews – he’s probably the most elite pure goal-scorer in the league, save for Connor McDavid.  Thirty-seven goals last season.  Mitchy scored twenty-six.  And then there’s the other guys – Kasperi, Andreas, and Zach all scored twenty last season.  Morgan Rielly, our best defenseman – he even scored twenty last season.  He was a monster.  Didn’t get nominated for the Norris, stupidly, but a monster nonetheless.  And William Nylander – elite goal scorer too.  His numbers last year don’t reflect that because he only played a half a season, but he’s as elite as the rest of them.”

At the mention of William’s name, Aberdeen shifted uncomfortably.  She tried not to pay attention to anything he said about William because it would just lead her to the memories, and then she’d be done for.  “So we’re a good team,” she inferred from what Brendan was telling her.  

Brendan chuckled this time.  “You could say that.”

When the practice was over, she organized for Mr. Shanahan to do more media.  Everybody was eating him up.  He gave great soundbites, talked about the hockey scene in Newfoundland, and about the Leafs practice.  He, of course, picked up on things during practice Aberdeen didn’t even notice.  The reporters ate it up like they couldn’t get enough.  And when Mr. Shanahan was finished, they waited somewhat impatiently for the players.  

Hockey clearly meant a lot to everyone around her.  It was what drove them, what sustained them, and what they were passionate about beyond everything else.  She had to make sure she kept up with their intensity, or else she felt like everything that the success of her in her job depended on may crumble.

***

When the day was done, the team, management, and media retreated back to the hotel.  It was around 6pm, and there were a lot of people in the lobby, figuring out their next steps.  As Aberdeen walked through the doors with Mr. Shanahan, she saw everybody congregating in their groups.  Some of the players had already changed out of their workout gear and into casual clothes, obviously ready to go out for a bite to eat.  She hoped that the hotel had room service, because she knew exactly what she’d be doing for the rest of the night.

“Aberdeen, do you have plans tonight?” Brendan asked suddenly, taking his phone out of his pocket.

“No sir.  Just room service for dinner and—”

“Oh, Aberdeen!” he cut her off, his tone almost scolding.  “You’re twenty-one years old and you’re in St. John’s.  You can’t stay in and order room service.”

Easy for him to say.  “Well—”

“Do you want to come to dinner with me and some of the hockey ops guys?” he asked politely.  She knew he was just doing this to be exactly that – polite.  There was no way he would want to hang out with his executive assistant outside of work hours.  

“I’m fine.  It’s okay—”

“Hey Brendan,” they suddenly heard a voice.  They turned their heads to see Jason Spezza approaching them.  He was dressed much better than most of the other guys, and Aberdeen attributed that to the fact that he was older.  “We were wondering if we could take Aberdeen out to dinner to show her around St. John’s.”

She looked behind Jason to see Kasperi, John, Morgan, and William.  Her eyes bulged out of her head.  “Oh, thank you for the offer, but it’s okay—”

“What a great idea!” Brendan exclaimed at the same time, turning at her and smiling.  “You got out of dinner with us old bozos!”

“No no no—”

“Have fun!” Brendan said as he began walking away, joining another group of men and slapping one of them on the back.

Aberdeen looked up at Jason.  Her cheeks flushed red with anxiety at the prospect of spending hours with them.  “You need to calm down,” Jason told her.  “We’re just guys.”

“You’re the Toronto Maple Leafs,” she stressed, trying not to meet William’s eye.

“So?” he shrugged his shoulders.  “We’re just trying to be nice, Aberdeen.  I don’t want to see you all alone when everyone else on the team is going to be out having fun.”

“Why not?”

Jason shrugged his shoulders.  “Because you’re part of the team now.”

Aberdeen considered the words coming out of Jason’s mouth.  It hadn’t even been a week since her first day, since she walked in on everyone in their underwear, and already she was “part of the team” and invited to go out to dinners with them.  She didn’t understand.  Why were they being so nice?  She was a nobody – to them, to the organization, to the world.  She was only a personal assistant.  “But—”

“Aberdeen, the more the argue this, the more you’re going to have to hear my voice telling you to come,” Jason said.  “Are you really going to make me beg?”

His damn puppy dog eyes were the only, and she means the only reason she gave in.

***

Auston Matthews and Frederik Andersen joined the group before they left to walk along Water Street, eventually choosing a fresh seafood restaurant to have dinner in (because why go to St. John’s and not get fresh caught seafood?).  Aberdeen walked alongside Jason making small talk with him, with Auston, Fred, Morgan, and John ahead of them and William and Kasperi behind them.  Once they were seated at the restaurant, she found herself sandwiched between Jason and Morgan.  William was right across from her.  

“So where are you from, Aberdeen?” John asked as everyone finished giving their order to the waiter.  

“I was born and raised in Toronto.  Etobicoke, actually,” she said.  “Royal York and Bloor.  But south of Bloor – not the Kingsway.  Nobody can afford to live in the Kingsway.  Well – you guys can,” she rambled, finally stopping to take a sip of her water.

“Any siblings?” Morgan asked.

“My older sister Siena is 23.  She’s at the University of Ottawa for law school.  Then there’s the baby Camden.  He just turned eleven this summer.”

“That’s quite the spread,” Kasperi commented.  She could see William side-eye him, not appreciating the comment.  It was a fair comment, but Aberdeen hated when people made it.  Yes, there was a huge gap between them.  So what?  Lots of families had huge gaps between siblings.  Hers was not unique.  

“He was definitely an oops baby, if that’s what you mean,” she deadpanned, looking right at him.

“Oh no no no – I didn’t mean it like that at all—” he tried to cover himself.

“Dude, there’s ten years between Daniella and I,” William quipped.

“Yeah but there’s three other kids in between you guys—”

“Will you two just be quiet?  God you’re like Tweedledee and Tweedledum,” Morgan said.  “Ignore them, Aberdeen.  What do your parents do?”

“My mom is an elementary school teacher and my dad is a mailman with Canada Post.”

“And who’s your favourite Toronto Maple Leaf?” William asked, taking his own sip from his drink.  The way he was looking at her would make any girl’s head spin, and it made Aberdeen’s spin for a split second before she remembered that she was at a table full of men who happened to be his teammates and who would most definitely notice any suspicious behaviour on her part.  

“Not any of you,” she said in a playful tone, causing the whole table to ooh and aww and clutch their hearts.  

“Really?  Even when we’re buying you dinner?” William continued.

“You’re going to need to do more than that,” she smiled.

“You mean buy you a drink?  You like vodka-based stuff?”

Aberdeen’s face dropped.  Vodka was the main alcohol in all the cucumber mules she drank when she met him at King Taps.  Drinking all those cucumber mules was the reason she let all her inhibitions go and brought him back to her place to sleep with him.  Well that, and his personality.  And his eyes.  And his hair.  And his body.  And his – snap out of it!  “I’m more of a gin girl myself,” she said, bringing her class of water to her lips again.

“Could have fooled me,” he quipped.

Morgan brought the conversation back to hockey – why they were all there.  The boys let her in on a few traditions and the etiquette around the arena, especially on game days.  When she asked about all the media on the trip and why they were they everybody let out a collective groan and explained to her how hounding the media was in Toronto.  When the food came the talk died down a bit but John began explaining to her the rivalries, the divisions, the conferences, who the Leafs liked and didn’t like, teams to watch out for as well as teams with friends on them.  Their good friend Tyler Ennis, who just played on the Leafs last year was now in Ottawa, and they’d be seeing him at the season opener.  Aberdeen wished she had a notebook where she could write this all down.  Jason explained how excited he was for the season opener – how he got some tickets for his extended family and friends to see him play.  Auston explained how his parents would be flying in from Arizona.  It was all very nice to hear.

Jason ended up paying for her meal even though she fought him on it.  When they decided to leave, the owner of the restaurant came out to shake hands with all of them and asked for a picture.  They obliged, and the owner was over the moon.  He said he was going to blow up the picture, frame it, and put it right at the entrance.  That’s when Aberdeen understood how hockey crazed some people could be.  

Instead of going directly back to the hotel, Morgan persuaded everyone to take a walk down by the harbour.  He used the map on his phone to guide them, and Aberdeen would unintentionally hold the group up by taking pictures of all the old and colourful buildings.  She couldn’t help it – if traveling was going to be a perk of the job, then she was going to enjoy it as much as possible.  

The harbour was beautiful, even though it was dark, and she made a mental note to come back if she had any free time when it was light out.  She also wanted to climb Signal Hill.  She took out her phone and clutched it in her hands shyly, looking at the guys talking amongst one another.  “Um…can someone take a picture of me?”

Jason, of course, was the only one who heard her.  “Give me your phone,” he extended his hand, and she gave it to him as she went to pose along the guardrail.  He took a few photos, and even turned on the flash.  All the guys watched on, and Aberdeen felt a bit awkward.  Apparently, Jason sensed it.  “Can we make it look like she has friends?” he announced to the guys, causing them all to laugh.  “Jesus fuck, guys.  Go pose with her.”

They all surrounded her, throwing their arms over each other.  Auston draped his arm over her shoulder.  Fred’s extended all the way to her shoulders too, despite being a two people away from her.

William’s was the only arm around her waist.  

***

September 17th, 2019

“You could have said I was your favourite the other night,” a voice Aberdeen could only place as William’s said as she was looking down at her iPad.  Everybody was in Mile One Stadium for the game, and the arena was already full with eager fans.  

She didn’t even know how he found her.  Wasn’t he supposed to be getting ready?  How did he have the time to bother her and be a menace?  “But you’re not my favourite.”

“Ouch, Aberdeen,” he put his hand over his heart like the rest of the guys had done that night at dinner.  

“Well you’re not,” she reiterated.

“Then let me rephrase the question,” he started, “You could have said I was fucking awesome.”

Aberdeen’s face dropped again.  Yet again, those were the words she had used after they’d finished having sex.  She blurted them out, but he agreed.  God, to think that it stroked his ego for months and he still remembered months after the fact.  “What are you trying to do here?” she asked him.

“When we met in June you kept talking and talking and I let you because I love the sound of your voice,” he said.  Her heart stopped beating momentarily.  She was hyperaware of the present tense use of ‘love’ and not ‘loved’ in his sentence.  “I’m just trying to talk to you.”

She shook any thought about that night or about “I love hearing you talk” out of her head as she got up.  This was all a game to William – that much she figured.  Why else would he find her?  Why else would he repeat her words back at her and taunt her with them?  Why else would he offer to buy her a drink in front of six of his teammates?  She didn’t know if he was telling the truth, if he was just taunting her, or…God, what if he wanted to hook up again?  Was he really that kind of guy that he was doing all this again to somehow seduce her?  A fun little romp with the office girl so he could show off to all his buddies?  Regardless of what it was, Aberdeen knew this was dangerous, extremely dangerous.  It was a game she wasn’t willing to play when so much was on the line for her personally and professionally.  

“Well, don’t,” she huffed, staring at him.  “This isn’t a game and I’m not a pawn.  I’m here to work and do a good job.  I’m most definitely not here to keep you entertained,” she said, walking away from him.  

***

September 18th, 2019

The Toronto Maple Leafs lost both exhibition games to Ottawa, but it didn’t really matter because they were just that – exhibition games.  Mr. Shanahan was still peeved that they lost, but he took it in stride.  When their charter plane finally landed in Toronto at around 11:45 at night on Wednesday, Aberdeen was ready for bed.  All she wanted to do was cuddle Minerva and sleep for twelve hours.  She was especially excited to have the day off tomorrow.  She could at least do laundry.  

When they were free to get her luggage, the tag-team of Tyson Barrie and Jason Spezza made sure they got her bag for her.  Mr. Shanahan had already left – he was the first one off the flight – because his son was picking him up, and he didn’t want him waiting and getting a ticket.  

“Aberdeen, do you have a ride?  Is somebody picking you up?” John asked, extending the handle on his luggage.  From behind him, she noticed William lurking and waiting for her answer.

“Nah, I’m good.  I’m just hopping on the UP,” she waved him off.  She would have to ask an airport employee where to get the UP Express.

“What?  No way,” John shook his head.

“No no no,” said William from behind him, shaking his head.

“No no no,” said Travis who was standing by her, shaking his head.

“No no no,” said Tyson who was also standing by her, shaking his head.

“No,” John repeated.  You would think she said she was going to walk the entire way home instead of take public transit.  “You live downtown, right?  That’s what you said at dinner?” he asked, but didn’t even wait for her to respond.  “Who’s going downtown and can drop off Aberdeen?” John asked loudly so everyone could hear.

“It’s fine, it’s really fine—” she tried to intervene.

“Bee’s coming to pick me up – we can drop Aberdeen off no problem,” Morgan offered.  

“I’ve got Saylor picking me up,” Kasperi offered.

“Morgan will do it,” John said quickly.  

Aberdeen looked over at Morgan.  “You really don’t have to—”

“Nonsense,” he extended the handle on his luggage.  “Follow me.”

He led her out of the private hangar towards a black Honda Civic.  Aberdeen watched as a girl got out of the car.  She was unconventionally pretty, with beautiful long hair.  She wore comfy looking oversized cardigan and plain black tights.  She only assumed this was Morgan’s girlfriend.  When they got close, Morgan kissed her.  “I volunteered to drive Aberdeen home,” he said, nodding back towards her.

Bee looked at her.  “Great!  Hop in.  Just put your luggage in the backseat – I don’t mind,” she said, turning and getting into the passenger’s seat.  Morgan opened the trunk to put his bigger suitcase in before returning to the driver’s seat.  Aberdeen had a grip on her luggage.  

“So what position do you have with the Leafs, Aberdeen?” Bee asked from the passenger’s seat, even shifting so she was actually able to look at her.

“I’m Brendan Shanahan’s personal assistant.”

“Oh, that’s so cool!” Bee smiled.  “Brendan’s awesome.  But I’m sure you’re realizing that.  God, I bet a million people would kill for your job.”

Aberdeen shrugged her shoulders.  “I guess.  I didn’t really uh, you know, watch hockey before this.”

“I didn’t either, until I met Morgan,” Bee said.  “Don’t worry.  It has its way of sucking you in.  There’s a certain magic to the game that you can’t get away from.  You just have to make sure you keep your head above water.”

“Right.”

“Where do you live, Aberdeen?” Morgan asked, looking at her through the rear-view mirror.  

“Oh!  I’m on Nelson Street.  It’s near University and Adelaide.”

Bee punched the address Aberdeen gave into her phone.  “You let us know whenever you need a ride back into the city from the airport, okay?  You’re not that far from us.”

“Um, thank you,” she said as she felt Morgan put the car into drive.

“No problem at all, Aberdeen.  Love your name by the way.”

They made small talk throughout the ride, and thankfully, because it was so late, the roads were clear.  In just less than twenty minutes, Aberdeen was home.  She thanked Morgan and Bee profusely before leaving.  Bee watched her go in as Morgan texted on his phone.

“Who are you texting at this hour of the night?” she asked.

“Willy,” he said absent-mindedly.  “Wants to make sure we got home okay.”

Bee furrowed her brows.  “He’s never texted us about that before.”

Morgan shrugged.  “Whatever.”

[rougesrant]

The Rogues Rant #267

Welcome to The Rogues Rant, an occasional look at all things Rugby.

News has just come through that Super Rugby will be heading back to WIN Stadium in May. The 3rd Round match of the Cross Over Super Rugby Tournament featuring the Waratahs and Champion NZ side the Crusaders will be played at 3.00PM on Saturday afternoon the 29th May. The IDRU will be conducting a Special Breakfast Function on the day and all local IDRU Round 9 club matches will be rescheduled to allow time for everyone to attend WIN Stadium.

Just what Super Rugby will look like come 2022 is still up in the air. New Zealand Rugby and Rugby Australia has agreed in principle that Fijian Drua and Moana Pasifika will be become part of the competition going forward. Rugby Australia Chairman Hamish McLenneon and CEO Andy Marinos made a quick trip to New Zealand this week for discussions re how the Comp will look in 2022. Fijian Drua is the Fiji based outfit that previously competed in the National Rugby Championship in Australia while Pasifika will be made up of players who identify with Fiji, Samoa and Tonga and will possibly be based in New Zealand. Just how the competition will be formatted is yet to be agreed. We’ll just have to wait and see what they come up with but the addition of the islanders should bring quite a bit of new interest to the comp.  

Sad to hear the news this week of the passing of well-respected Vikings stalwart Brad Lloyd. Brad a former Vikings player, administrator and a regular supporter on the Vikings hill passed away earlier in the week after a six month battle with Cancer. Rest in Peace Brad Lloyd.

Players beware. The IDRU Judiciary have shown again this week, that they are not mucking around when it comes to foal play. A Vikings second Grade player was handed a 16 week suspension for Head Butting on Wednesday night. This comes on the back of a similar suspension from Round 1 and a life ban after an attack on an official also from Round 1. Players, you’ve been warned.

It’s the last round before the play offs in Australian Super Rugby this week. The Brumbies who have the Bye will not earn any Points and will finish second no matter what happens in the two matches to be played. If things go true to form then the Rebels should finish third but if the Force can get the points against the Reds and the Waratahs can get up against the Rebels then the Force will finish third and play the Brumbies in the Qualifying Final next week. I don’t think that will happen. My tips for this week: The Reds, Rebels, Chiefs and Crusaders.

None of the various IDRU Challenge Shields will be up for grabs this week. Avondale successfully defended the Peter Woods Shield with their win at Kiama last week, while Camden claimed the Talk2MeBro Shield with their win over Vikings in 2nd Grade last Saturday. All three Shields will be up for grabs in Round 6 on the 1st May. This week Camden are at home to Bowral and can expect plenty of opposition from the Blacks who are coming off a loss last week. Bowral should still get the points here. Bowral to Win. Campbelltown clash with University at Campbelltown Showground. With the students struggling after three straight losses, and the Quinnies sitting unbeaten after three wins Campbelltown will win here. Campbelltown to Win. Avondale will have a challenge from an improving Tech Waratahs side at Gerry Cappetta Oval. Avondale have three wins behind them while Tech have three losses so far but the Wombats can expect a physical contest from this Tech Waratahs side. Avondale should get the points. Avondale to Win. Vikings and Kiama meet at Vikings Oval with both sides on the improve. Vikings registered their first win last week against Camden while Kiama have two losses in a disjointed start to the year. It’s always a good match between these two arch rivals no matter how they stand on the table and this week will be no different but I think the Blueys can win. Vikings to Win. The Match of the Round is at Shoalhaven Rugby Park with the Shoalies hosting Shamrocks. The Rocks sit on top of the table while the Shoalies are currently fourth but just one point behind after both sides have three from three so far. The Brumbies have the bye this week so Shoalies could have Will Miller available and be at full strength. Will Miller or not I think Shoalhaven can bring the Rocks winning run to an end. Shoalhaven to Win.

RUGBY DIARY

24th April           IDRU Round 5

                          Camden V Bowral at Camden Rugby Park. 3.15

                         Campbelltown V University at Campbelltown Showground. 3.15PM

                         Avondale V Tech Waratahs at Gerry Cappetta Oval. 3.15PM

                         Vikings V Kiama at Vikings Oval. 3.15PM

                         Shoalhaven V Shamrocks Shoalhaven Rugby Park. 3.15 PM

 29th May            NSW Waratahs V The Crusaders at WIN Stadium. 3.00PM

 12th-14th June     NSW Country Week, Tamworth.

                          NSW Junior State Championships. Various Venues

 3rd-4th July       U10/U11 NSW Junior State Championships. Tuggerah Sports Complex.

 4th September    IDRU Grand Final.      

All opinions offered in this column are the opinion of the author. They should not be considered to represent the views of the IDRU.

[spookyspemilyreid]

Happy Anniversary “Meteora”! (March 25, 2003)❤️

Meteora is the second studio album by American rock band Linkin Park. It was released on March 25, 2003 through Warner Bros. Records, following Reanimation, a collaboration album which featured remixes of songs included on their 2000 debut studio album Hybrid Theory. The album was produced by the band alongside Don Gilmore. The title Meteora is taken from the Greek Orthodox monasteries sharing the same name. Meteora has a similar sound to Hybrid Theory, as described by critics, and the album took almost a year to be recorded. It is the first Linkin Park studio album to feature Dave Farrell after he rejoined the band in 2000.

Meteora debuted at number one on the Billboard 200, selling over 810,000 copies in its first week. Linkin Park released singles from Meteora for over a year, including "Somewhere I Belong", "Faint", "Numb", "From the Inside", and "Breaking the Habit". The song "Lying from You" was released as a promotional single. Meteora received generally positive reviews, although critics noted that the album's musical style was similar to its predecessor Hybrid Theory .

Meteora has sold over 27 million copies worldwide, making it one of the best-selling albums of all time. It is certified 7x Platinum by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA). It was ranked number 36 on the Billboard Top 200 Albums of the 2000s. Some songs from the album were remixed with some of Jay-Z's songs for the EP Collision Course (2004). "Session" was nominated for Best Rock Instrumental Performance at the 46th Grammy Awards.

Initial writing for a second album dated back to early 2001, while still touring in support of Hybrid Theory. The band had written around eighty different demos during their Hybrid Theory World Tour and LP Underground Tour, within the span of just eight months. Rough song ideas written then would find its way to the final album; notably the intro for "Somewhere I Belong". Bennington recorded guitar notes for it, but found it too folk rock sounding. However, Shinoda and Joe Hahn reworked it, adding effects to it, and then played it backwards, molding it into something the band was happy with. As explained by Shinoda: "Since I reversed it, it was playing 4-3-2-1. The chord progression was reversed. Then I cut it into four pieces, and I played it 1-2-3-4. And that's why it has that sweeping sound.

In early 2002, after the touring, the writing continued in Mike's home studio, pre-production of the album began there. The band worked in pairs during the writing process, whereas Shinoda was always involved in all the songs. The recording of the songs mainly used Pro Tools, whereas the band used the traditional method of writing, in main studio. In June, pre-production terminated and the band headed for main production. The band finalized Don Gilmore as their producer. When Reanimation was released, the band had started to write the main content. Rob Bourdon spent eight hours a day in the studio for the recording of the album. By August, the band entered NRG Studios as Bennington also began writing songs with the band.

Linkin Park had finished versions of many songs before the actual recording process had begun, but they majorly wrote the finalized songs included in the track list in the studio. By October the drums were finalized and guitar parts were introduced by Brad in the control room of the studio. By the end of October, the bass parts were introduced. Don Gilmore himself being a bass player helped Farrell in his recording. The sampling part by Hahn was introduced just a month before the deadline, thereby Mike finished the recording of "Breaking the Habit" with strings arrangement by David Campbell; the song had been worked on by Shinoda for five or six years. The vocal production started in November. The mixing process as well as the album itself was finished in New York City.

Lyrically the album contains elements including depressing emotions, anger, and recovery. Explaining to MTV, Bennington said: "We don't talk about situations, we talk about the emotions behind the situations. Mike and I are two different people, so we can't sing about the same things, but we both know about frustration and anger and loneliness and love and happiness, and we can relate on that level." In the same interview, Shinoda explained it as: "What we really wanted to do was just push ourselves and push each other to really find new ways to be creative." He continued: "We wanted each sample that was in each song to be something that might perk your ear – something that you might not have ever heard before." In a promotional interview, Rob Bourdon stated: "We wanted a group of songs that would sit well together because we wanted to make a record that you could pop into your CD player and, from beginning to end, there would never be a spot where you start daydreaming." In titling the album, Mike said that "Meteora was a word that caught my attention because it sounded huge." Dave, Joe, and Chester elaborated that just like how Meteora, the rock formations in Greece, is very epic, dramatic, and has great energy, the band wanted the album to have that same feeling.

Genre-wise, the album is categorized as nu metal, rap metal, rap rock, and alternative rock.

The promotion for the album began well ahead before its release, as pictures of the band recording were distributed to the media. To support the album, there were many photo shoots of the band on October 29 at the Ambassador Hotel, where the band took a break from recording the album for two days, for designing the cover art of the album. "The Flem" and "Delta" helped the band for the art works, for the album as well as for the singles spawned by it. A TV commercial for the album was premiered on January 1, 2003. "Somewhere I Belong" was released as the first single, premiering on US radio on March 18, 2003. Being released only nine days before the album release, it influenced the album sales performance worldwide. The second single off the album was "Faint", released before the band started its world tour. The third single "Numb" was released when Linkin Park performed it live in Madrid. "From the Inside" was released as the fourth single off the album before the North American leg of the world tour. "Breaking the Habit" was released while the band was in Indonesia. The album was released with various limited edition content for promotional purposes.

There is a special edition of Meteora, which includes the "Making of Meteora" DVD documentary. The special-edition package was packaged in a blue tinted case with the blue Meteora cover that can be found in some parts of Asia, United States, and more commonly in India. An alternate Indian version contains an alternate DVD and alternative cover that is packaged in a slimline case with the disc in original packaging. The "Tour Edition" of Meteora is packaged in a two disc set. The second disc, which is a Video CD, has the music videos for "Somewhere I Belong", "Faint", "Numb", and "Breaking the Habit". The tour edition is packaged in a standard Compact Disc case, rather than their trademark digipak case. The album was also released on a very limited quantity of vinyl records (spread across two LPs) under Warner Brothers. These are coveted by collectors and fetch high prices at auction. In 2014, Linkin Park released a demo version of Shinoda singing the song, on their 14th annual fan club CD, LPU XIV. 

The band promoted the album with their Meteora World Tour and various other supporting tours. The world tour was supported by Hoobastank, P.O.D. and Story of the Year. The band played shows at Pellissier Building and Wiltern Theatre on the day before the album release and on the release date. The shows were called "'Meteora' Release Show". The European leg was cancelled because Chester was having severe back and abdominal pains. As a result, half of the music video of "Numb" was shot in Los Angeles and the Czech Republic. The album was also promoted by the Projekt Revolution festival. A live album was released in support of the album titled Live in Texas. Linkin Park played various special shows worldwide, including "Reading Ireland", as well as performing during the Kerrang! Awards, "Livid", "X-103's Not So Silent Night", "The End's Deck The Hall Ball" and "KROQ Almost Acoustic X-Mas", in promotion of the album.

Meteora received generally positive reviews, although critics noted that the album's musical style was similar to its predecessor, Hybrid Theory (2000). The overall Metacritic score is 62. E! Online rated it A, and expected it to "shoot straight for the stars". Entertainment Weekly described it as "radio-friendly perfection". Dot Music described it as a "guaranteed source of ubiquitous radio hits". Rolling Stone said the band "squeezed the last remaining life out of this nearly extinct formula". Billboard Magazine described Meteora as "a ready-made crowdpleaser". The New Musical Express said it had "massive commercial appeal" but left the reviewer "underwhelmed". 

AllMusic described the album as "nothing more and nothing less than a Hybrid Theory part 2.", but added that the band "has discipline and editing skills, keeping this record at a tight 36 minutes and 41 seconds, a move that makes it considerably more listenable than its peers... since they know where to focus their energy, something that many nu-metal bands simply do not." Sputnikmusic writer Damrod criticized the album as being too similar to Hybrid Theory, but praised the album's production quality and catchiness, stating "the songs just invade your brain".  

Blender described it as "harder, denser, uglier", while Q described it as "less an artistic endeavor than an exercise in target marketing." Entertainment Weekly gave the album a B+, calling it a "thunderously hooky album that seamlessly blends the group's disparate sonic elements into radio-friendly perfection".  

The song "Session" was nominated for a Grammy Award for Best Rock Instrumental Performance in 2004.

In its first week, Meteora debuted at number one on the Billboard 200. The album sold at least 810,000 copies its first week of release. As of June 2014, the album has sold 6.2 million copies in the US, and over 27 million copies worldwide. The album was ranked number 36 on Billboard's Hot 200 Albums of the Decade.

[justinsdaysinthedark]

Post #12 - 317 Days

209 days since my last blog post, hey? Time flies when you fit two rounds of Chemo, a birthday, Christmas, New Years, a cricket season, Australia Day, Valentines Day and to top things off, a worldwide pandemic in there.

First and foremost, let me clear the air. Why haven’t I posted a blog since September 18, 2019?

I’ve been telling people it’s because I’ve been lazy - which look - let’s be honest, that’s partially true. I think my blog early days let me emotionally explore my deep feelings, understand what was going on and share to you all what I was going through. It was used to express my feelings and thoughts when I felt I had to and I was okay with that.

Since September until the end of my chemo though, I very much shut myself off to the world and spent the time focused on me and getting better. Post chemo was about getting better, back into life and into a normal routine that I was comfortable with. Whilst I admit I was being lazy, a large part of me wasn’t ready to talk about what I’d been through or was about to go through. I wanted to spend the back quarter of 2019 focusing on me with my loved ones around me because that’s what felt most important at the time.

Round 3 of Chemo was exactly like the first round. Just as rough on my body however I felt prepared this time. A little drug called Methotrexate (the word still haunts me!) got to me again and basically shut my body down for a fortnight or so. My mouth produced mucus instead of saliva and I had ulcers right through my body - from mouth to gut. It wasn’t a pleasant experience and I hope nobody I know ever has to go through that again.

Round 3 chemo began on Wednesday September 18th, 2019 and I eventually got out of hospital on October 20th - a month and two days later. It would’ve been sooner however that final week I ended up contracting what they call parainfluenza type 3, which wasn’t as bad as the flu but worse than a cold. The constant temperatures every night were a pain when all I wanted to be was at home. I eventually was sent home once everything settled and the next 10 nights at home were bliss - it was the longest time I’d been at home since June!

Round 4 and what turned out to be my final round of chemo began on October 30th, 2019. Much like round 2, it was a breeze. I felt absolutely fine all throughout, despite the fact I was neutropenic for a number of days. Eventually once my white blood cell count had risen enough, I was sent home on November 15th - just a brisk 18-day stay this time! My goal at the start of this journey was to smash out my chemo by Christmas time. Not only had I smashed it out by Christmas, I was done by my birthday (21st November)!

Following my final round of chemotherapy, I was required to head back to Monash Clayton every Wednesday for the next few weeks for blood tests and so that the nurses could clean my PICC line which was still in at this stage. A few weeks went by and my bloods were showing signs of improvement, which gave me an incredible amount of confidence in my body moving forward.

My PICC was finally removed on December 12th at Monash Clayton and this was to be, in retrospect my final trip to ward 44.

Friday December 13th saw my first outpatient appointment with the haematology doctors at Casey. As I expected, they were extremely happy with the progress and scheduled appointments once a month for the next little bit.

In my fifth blog, I wrote that I’d bookmark three dates throughout this journey. They are as follows:

* Finding out I had cancer (Thursday July 25th)

* Beginning Chemo (Wednesday July 30th)

* Finding out I’m in remission (???)

I’m pleased to let you all know that on my outpatient appointment on Friday, February 21st 2020, my haematology doctor Michael advised me I am officially in remission. It was fitting seeing it was Michael that initially told me 7 months earlier that I had lymphoma. I won’t lie, this was an incredibly happy moment after everything I’d been through since it all began in June. I was hesitant to use the word ‘remission’ since I’d left hospital in December but now that one of my doctors had officially confirmed it, I could settle it in my mind as well.

From here, my check up appointments got moved to every three months instead of every month.

As it stands this afternoon April 14th, 2020 I am kicking goals. I am as far as I am aware cancer free, my eye is basically back to normal. I finished the cricket season playing the final two games (which were huge for me!) and am now back at work 32hrs a week - and will be back full time (40hrs) over the coming weeks. I’m back to what I feel to be a ‘normal life’ and honestly couldn’t be happier. The trivial things in life don’t matter to me anymore and I fell like I am able to look at the bigger picture in things.

Whilst this post hasn’t been great - much like my life since June 2019 - I feel like I’ve ticked off something that’s been sitting with me for a few months now. A final blog post ✅

I’d like to end this by thanking each and every single one of you who supported me over the past 10 months. From my girlfriend Courtney, my parents, extended family and friends. My cricket club and football clubs as well as work colleagues. You‘ve all been incredibly instrumental in my life over the past 10 months and for that, I thank you.

I leave you with a variety of photos since I finished my final chemo treatment in better. I’m out the other side and unless something pops up in the future, it’s adios from me! xx

December 2019 with my Nephew, Jaxon. 

Christmas Day, 2019 with my cousin, Ella.

Bairnsdale inbetween Christmas and New Year, 2019. 

January 2020 with Courtney

Tasmania, January 2020

Ross Noble, February 2020

End of Cricket Season drinks, March 2020. 

[reidandweep]

Happy Anniversary

Colin Ritman x Reader (female)

A/N- Here is my first Colin Ritman imagine. I have steered away slightly from the original story, but not too much. Hope you enjoy it.

Word Count-1902 words.

Warning- Fluff and swear words. Making out.

Today was a very special day in Tuckersoft history, as it marked Colin’s third year at the company, and also your first. In the year that you had been a part of Tuckersoft, your skills in game production and marketing had extensively grown. But your relationship with Colin Ritman had grown even more. Starting from mere strangers on your first day, it would now come to a surprise to anyone in the company if they saw the one without the other. 

You were inseparable. So inseparable that Mr. Thakur moved your desk to Colin’s office after noticing you would always be doing your work there. You shared an office, you had lunch together, you sat by each other’s side in every meeting, and even waited for the other to finish work before heading back to one of your home’s for movie night. Because of this, people mistaken you two for being a couple. You weren’t. You may have harboured a large crush on the man. But that didn’t mean he held those same feelings for you. Colin was outgoing and spoke his mind all the time. So, if he did like you in that way, wouldn’t he have told you?

As it was the anniversary for both your and Colin’s employment at the firm, Mr Thakur had come up with the brilliant idea of throwing a party at the office. To celebrate the growing success Tuckersoft has held since Colin began creating his best-selling games, and since you improved those sales to an unbelievable percentage with your advertisement and marketing schemes. 

‘Sweet Dreams’ by the Eurythmics played through the speakers in the main office that had been decorated for the party. Colin sat on the sofa, a half-lit cigarette in one hand, and a glass of water in the other. People kept telling him to let loose, drink a little, but he hadn’t drunk since meeting Y/N. He didn’t feel the urge to drink when he was with her. He also hadn’t taken drugs, not after she had confided in him about the people she lost to such narcotics. Colin was enjoying his night watching the girl he adored dancing around their office, like she was in London’s most popular club, and without a care in the world.

Having been dancing non-stop for around 20 minutes, Y/N’s vision zoned in on Colin, forcing her tired legs to move in his direction. Slumping into the spot next to him, she lifted her legs, draping them across Colin’s lap. Without missing a beat, Colin passed the glass of water to Y/N’s hands, placing his now empty hand on her legs; stroking them ever so lightly without noticing.

“Congratulations Mr.Ritman. Three years is a huge accomplishment.”

Colin leant his head on the back of the sofa, continuing to stroke her leg, facing his best friend. A soft smile covered his features.

“Says you, Miss. (Y/N). You’ve been here one year and have turned this company into a booming business. I wouldn’t even still have this job without you.”

She laughed, knowing full well it was a lie. The only reason her job was so easy was because of the amazing games Colin produced. 

“That is a lie and you know it. My marketing campaigns are good because I am marketing amazing games Colin. Games made by you.”

She grabbed his hand that had been stroking her calf, his cigarette long burnt out and laying in the ashtray on the table. 

She was so lucky to have met him. And he was even more to have met her. 

Squeezing her hand, Colin stood, pulling Y/N up with him. Grabbing his jacket, he placed it over the girl’s shoulders.

“Why don’t we leave this shit party early, go back to mine, watch Jaws, and have a quiet night in?”

A fake gasp escaped her mouth.

“The Colin Ritman is ditching a party in his honour, to watch Jaws with little old me?”

He rolled his eyes. Grabbing her hand, Colin pulled Y/N out the office nodding to those who said their goodbyes.

Y/N giggled, wrapping her empty hand around Colin’s bicep, following his steps towards his flat.

The walk was fairly short, with both Y/N and Colin walking in mostly silence. They were exhausted. Having been at work since 7am, staying at their party until 11pm. They could not wait to go to bed. Especially because Thakur had given them the following day off. 

Arriving to Colin’s flat, Y/N grabbed the keys from his hand and unlocked the door. They both fell into a routine any couple would be jealous of. As Y/N hung up Colin’s jacket and moved to his room to change into some of his comfy clothes, Colin set up the movie in the VCR, turning on the kettle to make Y/N her favourite warm drink, and himself a coffee. Getting comfortable on the sofa, he took off his trousers, and slipped into the t-shirt he had left on the arm chair that morning. It was his home, and Y/N did not mind him being in his under wear.

Emerging from Colin’s bedroom just as the film began to start, Y/N dragged Colin’s large blanket onto the sofa. She had stolen his Alien t-shirt, and a pair of shorts she had left here on her last sleepover. Colin’s heart never failed to skip a beat when he saw her wearing his clothes. It never failed to skip a beat whenever he saw her in general. 

She quickly moved to cuddle into his side, draping the blanket over both herself and Colin. She became immersed in the film, even though her and Colin had seen it plenty times before. So much that this was their third tape as the other two had worn from how much it had been played.

Colin’s hand found themselves stroking Y/N’s back, whilst the other occasionally picked up his coffee to drink and push his glasses further up his nose. Y/N’s hands laid on Colin’s stomach drawing idle patterns as Jaws devoured the beach goers on the screen. 

In the midst of the calm and quiet, Y/N spoke up.

“Thank you, Colin.”

Confusion enveloped Colin’s features.

“Why are you thanking me? I haven’t done anything.” He replied.

She chuckled. He was so oblivious to how much he had changed her life.

Y/N sat up, pushing herself closer to Colin. He placed his arm around her waist, bringing her closer than anyone could be. 

She laid her hand on his chest, once again drawing random shapes to keep her focus on anything but his face. 

“You’ve changed my life. I came to Tuckersoft expecting to be fired in a week or hate my job. I had heard about the demands the company had and the reputation of how amazing their products were. I was shitting myself. Then on that day, one year ago, you walked up to me, offered me a cup of hot chocolate all because I looked like a chocolate kind of person. You looked so intimidating but the first interaction we had showed how kind you were.”

Colin smiled at the memory. He had never approached new staff, he waited till they introduced themselves to him. But when his eyes landed on her, and he saw how nervous he was, he couldn’t help but say the first thing he thought to calm her down.

“I was right though. You are a chocolate person.”

She laughed in reply.

“Anyway, let me continue, dickhead.”

She lifted her eyes to his face. Staring over his bleached hair, something he had asked her to do in the middle of the night after too many nights without sleep. Her gaze travelled over his features. Over his large-framed glasses, to the freckles scattered across his nose. 

“You’ve made my life so much better in a single year. And I can’t thank you enough for it.”

Looking back into her eyes, Colin knew. He had known for a while. He loved her. But now he knew that she loved him too.

Placing his cup down, he cupped her face. Stroking her cheek with his thumb, the ring she had brought him for his birthday felt cool against her burning, red cheek.

“I love you.”

Y/N breath caught in her throat. She was not expecting that as a reply. 

“Colin I-“

“I know I am not a sappy twat but let me say this. I love that you work so hard, and still take time to thank everyone for their contribution, even though it was all your hard work. I love how comfortable you are in my home and how you make it feel more like home when you’re here. I love that you always pack an extra packet of ready salted crisps because you know I’ll pick at yours throughout the day. I love so much about you. But I love you the most out of it all”

As Colin spoke, tears rolled down Y/N’s cheeks whilst her smile beamed the brightest they had both ever seen. 

Lifting a leg over Colin, Y/N situated herself on his lap. Moving his hands to her waist as hers travelled to his neck, she inched her face closer to his. 

“I love you too,” 

Colin’s smile mimicked Y/N’s as their faces drew closer and closer until their lips finally met. A year of smiles, a year of touches, a year of looks, moments, and feeling came down to today. 

Colin’s hands squeezed Y/N’s waist as hers travelled to his hair. Their lips locked and their lungs constricted as more air left by the second. Once she began to feel light headed, Y/N removed her lips from Colin’s, leaning her forehead against his.

Opening his eyes, his gaze travelled towards the clock on the wall.

11:57pm.

“You know, It’s still the 14th?”

She looked into his eyes, her hand playing with the hair at the nape of his neck as she whispered “so?” in reply.

“So, should we make this day three anniversaries?”

Lifting her head from Colin’s she sat up.

“What are you saying Mr Ritman?”

He chuckled, running his thumbs across the markings on her hips. 

“What I am saying, well more asking, is will you be my girlfriend?”

Throwing her head back with laughter, the sound reverberated through Colin’s body. Making himself let out a large laugh.

“Yes, you dickhead. I will be your girlfriend. Now come here and give me a kiss.”

Colin didn’t need to be told twice. 

14th June 1984. Colin’s three-year anniversary at Tuckersoft, Y/N’s one-year anniversary at the company, and the day they became official. 

The feeling of change was upon them. Change in their relationship and change for the company.

Lifting herself off Colin, she turned the T.V off. 

“Come on, let’s go to bed. We have tomorrow off to do whatever we want, and then were meeting that new kid on Monday to check out his idea, remember. What was his name again?”

Grabbing the blanket from the sofa, Colin placed his hand in Y/N’s dragging her towards his room. 

“His names Stefan. Want’s to show us his new game. It’s called Bandersnatch.”

Crawling into bed behind her, Colin opened his arms as she laid her head on his chest, wrapping his arms around her. 

“How do you think it will go?”

Looking down at the woman he loves, he smiles.

“I think it will go well. I made the right choices… this time.”

[comicteaparty]

June 8th-June 14th, 2020 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 8th, 2020 to June 14th, 2020.  The chat focused on Devil Tongue by Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Devil Tongue by Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto~! (https://deviltonguecomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace until June 14th, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Discussions are freeform, but we do offer discussion prompts in the pins for those who’d like to have them. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic! Whether you finish the comic or can only read a few pages, everyone is welcome to join and chat with us!

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 1

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic?

2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)?

3. Who is your favorite character?

4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?

5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores?

7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content?

8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

mariah (rainy day dreams)

1. I really appreciated how this comic felt really authentically shonen manga right off the bat without feeling tropey or overwrought. 2. I liked when the protagonists confront the ghost in the theater. I just really enjoyed the ghosts dialogue and dramatic jestures. 3. Moira is my fav so far. She's got a sword and seems capable, though is also still an apprentice so I'm looking forward to seeing how she grows.

boogeymadam

1, ALL THE CATS!! :D but more seriously, the way the characters are introduced through their job, and yet their personalities still shine through~ 2, i liked the scene when they're leaving the Lemaire house and walking on a dark misty neighborhood street at night. It's so atmospheric and perfect for their discussion on what kind of ghost their target might be, as well as what kinda threats it may pose :0 3, I can't decide, they're all interesting. Leera was introduced last but I like her enthusiasm! 2, Moira and Leera during the scene where Moira is explaining tinctures to Leera. Moira's so goal oriented and focused while messing with some apprently-very-dangerous stuff and Leera's just trying to avoid boredom. Moira seemed patient of Leera (for the most part) and willing to explain stuff, which was cool. It made me smile. 5, Oh Man, a lot!! The lines are so very clean and precise, every characters' silhouttes is distinct. It's hard to pick which page is my favorite, but I'd have to say https://deviltonguecomic.com/comic/chapter-01-page-32/ because of all the dynamic angles and expressions on the characters. 6, Pupils taking over from the mentor. I like how Emery is allowing his pupil, Moira, to prove herself, and she seems extremely eager to do so and also: good at it! I can only imagine what Emery is like at this job :0 8, A fun and classic premise of paranormal investigators, of a sort, but with magic of their own, making it even more interesting. It's easy to root for the protagonists and feel curious about what got them into this business, or what they were like before they reached this level of fame and skill. And also, there are talking cats!! Huge draw!

mariah (rainy day dreams)

I agree with your #6 Boogey. I do really like how Emery is like "I'm just here to mentor, this is Moira's job." I like seeing the apprentice really get to take point on the mission. I did see though on the cast page that Emery's magic type is just "?????" which definitely makes me what to see him throw down some magic now XD very curious what it is

boogeymadam

OHHH i hadn't spotted that! a secret, how exciting :0c

copperine (Lady Changeling)

I'm not familiar with this one, but I'm intrigued now (and should stop reading this channel till I've read the comic...)

I'll read in the morning and try to give some thoughts

RebelVampire

What I like about the beginning is the character development. Cause we get a lot of it and find out things like Emery being an ex-magician, his relationship with Moira, etc. Yet, at the same time, the plot is not sacrificed and the story is still moved along smoothly, which is a great balancing act. My favorite moment in the comic so far is actually all the times Emery feigns that he doesn't care but then we get those shots of him peeking and spying. I find those adorable but just also really nice character moments. My favorite character at the moment is Emery. I like aloof characters and he fits that bill. I also like his general cynicism about life. Emery is the sort of character who I'd have as a friend in real life. XD As for characters interacting the most, probably Leera and a combo of Emery and Moira. Leera has pretty different motivations for being there, is somewhat opposite in personality from the main pair, and just all around adds an interesting dynamic too the group that kind of makes certain elements of the story seem more grounded. I really just in general love the comic's linework. Not only is everything super clean (making the action easy to follow), but it really knows how to bulk up the shadows to create specific atmospheres that really work for each panel and add so much to each scene.

In terms of themes, I like that the comic somewhat explores with Emery the concept of what to do with your life after your previous life fails. I think we all kind of like to believe we'll do X forever and X comes to define us in a lot of ways. But then suddenly X might not be there and it's like, what is life now? How do I deal with life? And with Emery, I do think we get to kind of experience one path that kind of takes. What I like about the comic's overall content is the...strange mix of fantasy and realism. I can't really put it into words. Like this is definitely a fantasy story, yet there's elements of realism thrown in I wouldn't expect. Like things are almost scarily normal in some respects like the houses or journalism, etc. So everything about the world really intrigues me since it feels super unique in tone. Finally, for strengths, I'm referring back to the art here. I think the atmosphere the art adds to each scene really helps give the comic that extra oomph.

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

Everyone's covered all the stuff I like about the characters, so let me just throw in some extra praise for the backgrounds. Those elaborate buildings! That towering opera-house interior! That one sequence with light streaming through elegantly-patterned windows!

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 2

9. What do you think Emery did that caused him to be exiled by the Magician Order? How does this factor into his general cynicism and bitterness? Also, do you think Emery will ever be a magician again?

10. How do you think Moira became Emery’s apprentice despite Emery being an ex-magician? Similarly, why do you think Moira hasn’t joined up with the Magician Order? As the story develops, how do you think Moira will grow and change as a magician?

11. Besides following Emery and Moira around, what role do you think Leera will have in the story? How might Leera’s presence hurt or help the duo on each case? Also, how will Leera change as she experiences things firsthand?

12. How do you think Moira and Emery will resolve the haunted opera house situation? Can the kidnapped girl be saved, or is she truly gone forever? Additionally, what other sorts of cases do you expect to see after this one?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

RebelVampire

Honestly, I get the impression that Emery was good but also just a rebellious rule breaker type. So he probably got exiled for just not fitting in with the club regardless of anything else he might have done. Which to me would explain the cynicism cause it would show him how much of life is just a popularity contest. As for being a magician again, maybe, but the bigger question is would he want to? My current theory for Moira was that she's just ill-suited to the order. I'm sure she's heard awful things about it from Emery, so why join team lame when you can join Emery and be on team winner. As for how Moira will grow, I think she'll just learn to take things a bit more seriously and mature (though probably still pretty happy and excited). I've talked about Leera a bit already, but I think her major role in the story is the grounding element and reader's eyes. Cause someone needs to ask questions for the readers, and I think that will be Leera. But in terms of plot, I also think Leera will just help them get more work by spreading their name to lands far and wide. I think in terms of how Leera will change, I think mostly she'll maybe find better things to publish about and the power she wields with words. I think the kidnapped girl can be saved, but that it needs to be done quickly. As for how this will ultimately resolve, I assume epic battle followed by emotional ghost revelations. As for other sorts of cases, I actually am expecting lots of drama ones with heavy emotional reveals from side characters. I could be wrong, but that feels like the route the comic is going. O_O

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 3

13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic?

14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Ryccomics

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic? Very good dynamic introduction between Moira and Emery. Very quickly and effectively I understood Emery is an older cynic, and Moira is the energetic and out to prove herself. 2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)? The magic reveal of what the potions/chemicals do is fun. I do not really understand how they work at this time, and I don’t really need to. 3. Who is your favorite character? Mauretta, she’s a lot of fun in design, and she gets to talk more than usual character type. I’m not sure what this character type would be called, but I’m going with person who starts the Scooby Doo mystery. 4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most? Moira and Emery have good chemistry. Having the young rookie be more powerful than the experienced partners adds to the dynamic. 5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

So much going on in this panel. All 5 characters are doing something. 6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores? I don’t have an answer yet, because how this encounter goes will shape the narrative, everyone could die. It could be resolved peacefully, it could wrap like a monster of the week story, or lead to bigger things. 7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content? I like the map in FAQ area of site is cool. Gives information for those who want it, but can be safely ignored by those that don’t. 8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are? I like your line art, a lot. The silhouettes read really well. And when working in black and white having distinct shapes is so important, you’ve color code your characters. 9. What do you think Emery did that caused him to be exiled by the Magician Order? How does this factor into his general cynicism and bitterness? Also, do you think Emery will ever be a magician again? I know from the Cast FAQ, he broke their laws, in what contest will tell a lot about Emery and the Order. I am a little unclear what the Magicians are at this points, how powerful they are in this society. Are the Magicians outside of the Magician’s order?

10. How do you think Moira became Emery’s apprentice despite Emery being an ex-magician? Similarly, why do you think Moira hasn’t joined up with the Magician Order? As the story develops, how do you think Moira will grow and change as a magician? I think Moira will have to confront what caused Emery’s cynicism. I expect she will get more powerful as the story begins. 11. Besides following Emery and Moira around, what role do you think Leera will have in the story? How might Leera’s presence hurt or help the duo on each case? Also, how will Leera change as she experiences things firsthand? I Leera’s role will be mainly to ensure the characters get back onto the plot. Most stories have some form of this function, whether it is the Greek gods, a ticking clock to motivate the characters to act right now Given she works for a newspaper, she can prod the characters to do news worthy things. 12. How do you think Moira and Emery will resolve the haunted opera house situation? Can the kidnapped girl be saved, or is she truly gone forever? Additionally, what other sorts of cases do you expect to see after this one? I feel it will have a happy ending, monster defeated girl saved. This is because the character dynamics would change really drastically if Moira had to confront extreme darkness so early, she would get cynical. 13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic? Will be interesting to see how the combat functions with regard to group dynamics, are the other characters going to plan a part in the combat, or are they on the sidelines. 14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic? I was sad when it ended.

RebelVampire

I am looking forward to finding out more about Emery and what Emery is capable of despite the circumstances. As for final words, this is just a lovely comic with tons of unique aspects about it that I really like.

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Devil Tongue this week! Please also give a special thank you to Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Devil Tongue, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://deviltonguecomic.com/

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Samuel’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/sainezart

Lucas��� Twitter: https://twitter.com/lucaswordcraft

[maakenzee]

PLEASE PLEASE FRIENDS, SHARE THIS. (Click the link to view all the photos and please share all over!!)

If you never share any of my posts again I don’t care as long as you share this. I am providing all my screenshots. Every single one. The only screenshots I don’t have are of when I had to leave comments to get a response. I also don’t have screenshots of others reviews but I wish I did as many had the same experience as myself. And her responses were incredibly rude.

DO NOT ORDER FROM ”Kat's CT Handmade” on Facebook.

This shitshow (for lack of a better word) started on December 8th 2018. I saw a Facebook ad from a lady in the States making custom minky Harry Potter blankets.

I saw a pattern I fell in love with and despite being a student and not working much I decided to place an order. It was $65 USD which was about $85 Canadian. (I incorrectly say it’s $97 later in our conversation).

I was unaware that it was a 3 month (12 week) processing time when I ordered as it wasn’t stated in the ads or on her website. I had seen comments on her posts after others had ordered and that’s how I found out about the wait time. When March came I messaged her on the third (as it had almost been 3 months since I ordered) to confirm my blanket would ship soon. She claimed she had been sick twice and fell behind on orders and it would ship mid month. No biggie right? Wrong. So, so wrong I was.

March 29th 2019- My blanket should have been finished on March 8th and shipped mid month. After receiving no information regarding it I message Kat and was told her system was down and she couldn’t get anything done.

I sympathized as, being someone who works with technology, I understood things go wrong. But I was hopeful as I was told my blanket was on that weeks agenda!

April 6th 2019- I message Kat to confirm my blanket will be shipped that weekend and she responded it would be sent out the next night.

April 11th 2019- I message saying my blanket should have been shipped April 7th but I wasn’t given a tracking number so I wanted to confirm the shipment. It was then that I was told it went out last night on the 10th of April and not April 7th as I had been told and that it wouldn’t receive a tracking number until after midnight but she would send it via FB messenger.

April 16th- I haven’t received a tracking number so I reach out and don’t receive a response. I leave a comment on a Facebook post in order to get her attention.

April 19th- I finally get a tracking number and since at this point I’m annoyed with this process I’m happy to finally almost get my blanket and be done with this

April 30th- package says it’s delivered but I never received anything. I message Kat who says it can say that but still be delivered up to a week later so I wait it out.

May 4th- I decide to see if the USPS tracking number will transfer over to Canada post. It works! And I find out my blanket has been delivered!!....to a house in Saskatchewan. A whole province away from me. So I reach out.

May 5th- I receive a response and Kat says she’ll follow up regarding what happened. But will reship if necessary.

I ask if this means another 12 weeks of waiting and she assures me that no, she makes 3-7 blankets a day and I’d be at the top of her list.

She tells me to check in the next day regarding a plan (notice how she doesn’t offer to message me first? Notice how I always have to get in touch first for anything even when I’m told I’ll receive a tracking number the next day?)

May 6th- I follow up asking for a plan. She says she has the fabric coming in that weekend and will ship it out Monday.

May 14th- I ask for a tracking number because of course I haven’t received one. And guess what? I’m told it will be going out tonight.

Yup. Not May 13th as I was told before.

May 18th- I message AGAIN asking for a tracking number.

May 19th- I am sent a long message about her husband being in the ICU and that I was on the top of the list for getting postage assigned so it can be on it way.

Wait. Excuse me? It’s still not on its way?? So first it was May 13th, then it was supposed to go out May 14th and now May 19th I’m told it still hasn’t been shipped and due to the circumstances it won’t be shipped for another 4-5 days.

Unbelievable. I don’t argue it, there’s no point. You may think I’m a bad person for being angry when someone’s husband is in the hospital, but at this point it’s been 5 months since I ordered and I’d been given the run around too many times.

May 23rd- I ask for an update. No response.

May 26th- “hello?” I get a response saying I’ll have a tracking number tomorrow.

May 27th- no tracking number given

May 28th- I message asking for one. I finally get one!

June 6th- my shipment has been sitting in pre-shipment since May 28th stating “shipping label created, USPS awaiting item” 🤔

Kat says that’s not good and she will look into it and follow up that night

June 10th- I haven’t heard anything, I ask for an update.

June 12th- never got a response on June 10th so I try again. I am told she is in the middle of a miscarriage and will follow up with me the next night.

I do not need to know such personal information. And now I am in an uncomfortable situation. I am angry but don’t feel right lashing out at someone if they are indeed going through something like that. So I send as nice of a message as I can explaining my frustrations regarding the whole situation. That I understand her rough time but it has been 6 months since I ordered, that I splurged as being a student and not working much $85 CAD was a lot for me. That I don’t understand it being shipped to the wrong province. I even state I don’t want to come across as rude. I am trying my best to be polite.

She responds thanking me for my patience and being kind.

June 22nd- I ask for an update. No response

June 26th- she responds after I leave a Facebook comment on a post of hers and claims it’s a postage issue and as per usual she’ll “follow up tonight” 🙄

July 2nd- I ask for an update because god forbid she reaches out to me!!

July 6th- still no response and I message her asking her to please respond. I’m told a new shipping label was assigned and it will be on its way and she would send the notification as soon as she got it (nope!! Didn’t happen!!)

July 12th- I ask for a tracking number.

July 13th- “hello?”. Finally gives me a tracking number.

July 19th- my package has been stuck in pre shipment again for a week so I reach out. No response

July 20th- I ask for a response. But finally I’ve had enough. I send a screenshot of my original order and ask for a refund via PayPal and ask her to understand my reasoning as it’s been 7 months since I ordered. She tells me she doesn’t have PayPal but will put in a request for a refund. It should take 5-10 business days.

August 2- 10 business days later and nothing. Now I am pissed. I am done. I have been nice.

I have been so nice to this lady who had lied to me, ignored me and taken my money without any product exchange. I message.

No response.

I leave a comment.

It gets deleted.

Now I’m absolutely livid.

I message again saying it’s unacceptable to delete my comments and ignore me.

She responds it wasn’t deleted and was auto hid. I’m assuming she has set it up to auto hide any comments that are negative.

She tells me to send a refund request via PayPal. This is confusing since 10 days ago when I asked for a refund via PayPal she claimed she didn’t have it. Funny how that works, hey?

She also says “I’m done with this” as though all of this is MY fault and I am inconveniencing her.

Now I’m realllllllly mad.

I send her a message (please see photos below) and tell her how I feel. (Yes I say the wrong dollar amount)

She gives me bullshit excuses for why her reviews are turned off. And I regret not taking screenshots but let me tell you there were SO MANY bad reviews. All from people complaining they hadn’t received their blankets after MONTHS of waiting.

People saying she blocked them on messenger and they couldn’t get a refund...smh.

Kat threatened to take them to court. And what leg would you stand on, Kat? How can you say to a judge “these people are upset that I didn’t provide them with a product they paid me for so now they’re leaving me bad reviews”?? That makes no sense. They aren’t slandering your business, they’re telling the truth about what happened. Just as I am now.

I told her I sent my request and hours later I still have no refund, even though I stated I wanted it before the weekend. After all, IT’S MY MONEY. My hard earned cash. Not hers.

I have sent one last message and I don’t expect to receive my refund. So I guess I’ll be disputing it with my credit card company.

SO PLEASE do NOT order from this lady. She will take your money and provide nothing in return. She is a scammer and doesn’t deserve your business.

PLEASE SHARE so your friends and family know. And maybe, JUST MAYBE, her business will be shut down and no one else will lose their money.

8 months and I have no product and am out $85. Really freaking sucks.

(Also I apologize if I got any dates wrong, but you can see them all in the messages)

[staytheb]

Like Oh 2.0 - Summer Plans

Previous Chapter: Study Group Word Count: 3,459 Summary: School’s over and so the group hang out to discuss their summer plans with one another before they can’t hang out anymore.

Like Oh 2.0 masterlist

14th chapter and it’s getting halfway soon!! lol this one again looking up information as accurate as possible and setting up for GOT7′s actual schedule at the time, but a bit tweaks. so yeah, happy reading and kthxbai, Admin Lia~

On the first Tuesday of June Serena and a few other students were still taking their final exam for Beginner's Mandarin Chinese I. Mark had finished within forty minutes of the two hour exam and had left the classroom. Serena envied him, but she couldn't really be mad since he was more fluent than her. Anyways, Serena was almost done, but she wanted to double check her answers. She still felt unsure for most of them. Once she was done she turned in her papers with a happy smile while thanking Teacher Cuī for teaching her. "Cuī lǎo shī, xiè xie nǐ jiāo wó xué Hànyǔ." Serena politely bowed as the teacher bowed back in the same manner with a genuine smile. "Bú yòng kè qi. Wǒ hěn lèyi!"

"Zài jiàn, Cuī lǎo shī." Serena bid farewell as the teacher did the same. "Zài jiàn,  Pǔ Zhōng Lǐ." Serena walked out of the classroom and was greeted by the bright sun. "Ah, it's over." She expressed in English with content. "Now all that's left is nothing, but summer vacation!" She laughed quietly to herself and had walked a few paces when she stumbled back as something from behind her prevented her from moving forward. Serena looked behind her to see what it was and saw that it was Mark while shooting him a confused look and speaking in English. "I thought you left already?" "I did." He beamed at her while letting go of her backpack.

She re-adjusted her backpack. "Why are you still here?" "Waiting for you." The idol grinned as she grew shy upon his words. "I see." She switched over to Chinese for the fun of it and to distract herself from what he had said. "Wèi shén me?" She asked him 'why' and he just reply with just 'because'. "Yīn wèi." Mark shrugged with a teasing smile as Serena gave him a look and remembered something and switched back to English. "This kinda reminds me of our first day, but I left first and you came after me." Mark laughed. "It does, doesn't it? It's because you didn't say goodbye." Serena nodded and began to walk with Mark matching her strides. "I was trying to escape from your fans, but you just had to stop me that time."

"What?!" Mark shot her a surprised look. "I thought you were trying to be nice and respectful." "Wǒ shuō huǎng." Serena playfully stuck out her tongue while telling him she lied as he shook his head with a chuckle. "You're a jerk." Serena playfully gasped upon hearing the word, but cast him a grin before facing ahead again. "Of course." She looked behind her to see if anyone else had left the classroom, but no one came out and she cast the idol beside her another look before looking forward again. "You may want to hurry, Mark. Duàn one and Wáng one are still in there." Serena informed him jokingly. Ever since the first day of class Serena had referred all the Duàns and Wángs by numbers as an inside joke with Mark.

"They'll be in there for a little while longer." Mark chuckled as Serena nodded and Mark continued. "I already told Manager Seunghoon not to pick me up." She gave him a weird look as he smiled innocently at her. "What do you mean by that?" "I was gonna accompany you to your English course." Serena chuckled feeling sorry for the guy. "Too bad for you, I don't have to go." "Wait, what? Why?" Mark stopped walking and grabbed Serena by her backpack again out of habit. Serena jerked backward and gave him a look, but answered him anyways. "Because my friend gave the test earlier last Tuesday instead of this Tuesday. Didn't the boys tell you?" "No." "I thought they would since they did an amazing job and passed with flying colors. Of course the accent is still there, but other than that, they did great."

"No wonder they were relaxing around the dorm instead of panicking this morning." Mark muttered as the two started walking again. "Jinyoung's grammar and comprehension is the best. He'll be able to hold a conversation on his own with ease. Youngjae catches on very quickly when conversing, but pronunciation is a bit tricky. Yugyeom tends to forget a few words and the other meaning of a word or phrase, but he engages in the language quite well." Serena smiled proudly like a mother. "I was happy to see them all interact with one another and just get so excited speaking in English." "I'm glad you and your friend taught them well. You're both great teachers." Mark complimented with a genuine look. "Thanks, man." Serena smiled at him.

They ended up at the parking lot where Mark casually walked with Serena assuming he was automatically invited along. "Well, I'm done with school. What are you gona do?" She asked the idol as she reached her car. "Go with you." Mark cheekily replied. "Um..." She gave him a suspicious look. "I'm gonna meet with the other three." "Oh? You're going out for your 'young adult fun' tonight." Mark air quoted as he said it with a knowing smile. "Yeah. How you know?" "Because that 'young adult fun' plan," He air quoted once more with a secretive smile, "Has been changed." "Huh?" "I can see why Melanie gets annoyed with you easily." Serena narrowed her eyes at him as she unlocked only the driver's side door and got in without responding back. She tossed her bag onto the backseat of her car and closed the door.

Mark was about to follow, but the passenger's side door was still locked. Serena laughed. "Ahh, gotta love child proof locks." Mark knocked on her window and looked through the glass. "Let me in." The older woman heard him while she shook her head playfully as she started her car. "Aww, c'mon, Serena." Mark pouted and Serena made a face as she rolled her passenger's window slightly down. "Just call your manager, Mark." "Don't want to." "Don't be such a brat, Mark." "Just let me in, Zhōng Lǐ tóng xué." He said her name in Chinese. "Bù xiǎng, Yí Ēn tóng xué." Serena answered back in Chinese that she didn't want to with a laugh. Mark pouted. "I thought we were homies." "I don't have any homies. Stop pouting. It's ugly." "Don't lie, Serena. I know you like my pout and that I'm you best home boy."

"Yeah, if I was my sister." Serena grumbled to herself, but her mind told her otherwise as she put on her seat-belt before facing Mark again and rolling down the passenger's window a bit more. "How about you go bother my sister instead? We're totally alike." Mark scrunched up his face while shaking his head. "We're not that close unlike you and I." Serena turned away and muttered to herself. "Damn, that's true. Why did I have to take the Chinese class this semester?" She faced him again. "Why do you want to come with me so badly?" Serena asked as she leaned closer to the passenger side and rolled her window down a little more to see his face clearly. "Don't you have other things to do?"

"As of right now, nope." He smiled while he reached an arm through her window to find the button to unlock the door. "Now you're tryna break into my car?" Serena asked amused. "Nah. I'm tryna unlock the door so that I can enter my home girl's car while the said home girl is being a total jerk about it." Mark was unsuccessful in finding the switch. "Where is it?" Serena laughed as she re-positioned herself and unlock the door for him to enter. "Hurry up, home boy." "Yes!" Mark let out happily as he removed his arm from the window, opened the door, and got in while tossing his own bag into the back. "You're the real jerk." "Wǒ zhī dào." Serena pulled out her phone and messaged the girls. "What plans have changed?" She looked over at Mark once she was done sending the texts and he had settled himself in her passenger's seat.

"I don't know." Mark shrugged as he mess with Serena's radio. "Who told you?" "JB told me." "My sister told JB?" "Yeah. "No Seouldae?" "Nope. Go home." Serena narrowed her eyes at him. "That's why you're riding with me instead of calling your manager, huh?" "Yup." "You're such a butt-head." "A cute butt-head." "Yeah, I'll make sure to let the tunas know." "I still can't get over the 'tuna' thing. They already think I'm a fcukboy, so there's no difference." He shot her a cheeky look after finding a music station he liked. "They also think you're gay, have a soft spot for Jinyoung, and wonder so much about Jessica Koh." Serena muttered to herself as she reversed her car out of its parking space. "Say something?" Mark asked and Serena shook her head. "Nothing." 

~~~~~~~

Serena finished her shower, got dressed, exited the bathroom, and heard more than one voice out in the living room. Instead of making her way to her bedroom she went to the living room where it was supposed to be Mark playing the Need For Speed: Underground 2 after the two had gotten back a while ago. Serena noticed three blurry figures as one of them was yelling in Korean to which she recognized as Jackson's voice. "No! Turn! Turn! Turn! No!" He was yelling as the other two had the controllers in their hands which they ended up crashing against something. "I told you guys to turn!" Jackson let out frustrated even though he was just watching acting like a backseat driver. "You guys don't ever listen to me."

Serena rolled her eyes, left the trio, did whatever she needed to do and returned to the living room with glasses on. She noticed they were playing Mortal Kombat: Deception now. They were also eating the leftover pizzas and hamburgers from the other night and drinking the variety drinks she had just bought yesterday. "Don't y'all have better things to do than play video games and eat here?" Serena asked them which caused the trio to slightly jumped upon hearing her voice and turning around to face her with innocents smiles. "Weren't you showering?" Mark asked as Serena nodded. "I did. I finished a few minutes ago." "Don't girls usually take an hour or something?" Jackson asked confused as Serena shook her head. "I'm not like most girls. I take ten to fifteen minutes."

She looked from one face to the other. "Don't you have to prepare for July?" "Today's our free day before the real schedule begins tomorrow." Jaebeom answered as Serena nodded. "I see." Her eyes scanned the rest of the area. "Where are the others?" "Doing something." The trio replied at the same time which caused Serena to raise an eyebrow. "Mmhmm." She dismissed the topic altogether with a wave of her hand as she turned her back to them while walking away. "Whatever. You know the drill. I'll be in my room." Before Serena could walked any further she heard the front door open and saw the twins and her sister entering with a lot of bags in their grasps and gave them a curious look. "So what are we doing now?"

"You'll see." Melanie replied with a mischievous smirk that Serena had a feeling she wasn't going to enjoy. She slowly backed away towards her room. "You know what? I don't think I wanna do anything now." She smiled at them while still moving backwards. "You guys do what you wanna do." She pointed behind her. "I'ma be in my room and please don't disturb me." Serena quickly turned around and hurried to her room with a soft slam. "She's a trip, I swear." Jasmine commented with a laugh. "How long do you think she'll stay in her room for?" "Not that long." Jeannie answered with a knowing smile. "That girl needs to eat." "True." Melanie agreed with a nod of her head and looked at the idols. "Anyways, let's get started."

~~~~~~~

Serena exited her room about two hours later due to the fact that she was hungry and she needed to use the restroom. When she emerged into the living room after using the toilet it was filled with two big coolers that had a variety of drinks along with her coffee table filled with lots of food buffet style. Everyone was happily eating, chatting, and watching one of the recent Korean dramas to which Serena believed was Cheese In the Trap. She wasn't quite sure, but that's what the girls have been talking about recently. With a sly smile and cat-like tip-toeing Serena quietly, but swiftly tried to gathered a plate of food and what not so she could return to her room to finished the current MONSTA X fanfic she was reading. She wasn't noticed by the group of ten.

When she finished stacking her plate with food Serena quietly made her way back to her room, but didn't noticed the stealthy male figure doing the same thing when he happened to catch her sneak away. Serena had turned to close her door when she spotted Mark and she silently freaked out by tossing her plate at him. The contents hit the idol in the face and because he was also startled by Serena's sudden reaction Mark tumbled backwards spilling his own plate of food all over him in the process. Serena's eyes went wide in shock as she quickly exited her room to head to the bathroom where it had the first aid kit and brought it back with her along with a roll of toilet paper to check on the idol to see how he was doing.

"I am so sorry, Mark." Serena apologized as she bunched up some toilet paper to wipe the mess she had created. "It's okay. It was my fault that I spook you." He smiled at her reassuringly while gathering the spilled food onto the two plastic plates and using the toilet paper to wipe at the mess on the tile floor. "I just didn't think it would have resulted in this big of a mess." "Yeah, but that's such a waste of food." "Sorry." "Yeah, we both are." Serena chuckled as she handed him the last of the rolled paper while opening the first aid kit. "Are you hurt anywhere?" "I don't think so." Mark answered as she looked about himself and unconsciously touched his face to make sure he wasn't injured or anything of the sort.

"I think I'm okay." Mark confirmed slowly aware of how close Serena was. "Let me see." Serena commanded as she leaned to inspect the idol's face while Mark obeyed and moved his face when Serena directed him to. "Okay, all looks good." "You assaulted a K-Pop star?" Melanie asked her sister as she came to check on what the commotion was about and assumed it was Serena leaving her room for food. "I don't really know. Can't say for sure." Serena answered as she was unsure if it was counted as an assault or not. "Why does Mark have mash potatoes in his hair?" Serena eyes glanced to the idol's hair, saw the leftover bit, and used the toilet paper to wie it off. "Now he doesn't. See." "Mmhmm. Whatever, but why?"

Mark laughed embarrassingly. "I was curious why Jyongri noona didn't say anything to us. I followed and she didn't noticed me." "Because I'm/she's anti-social." The sisters answered in unison causing the two to just smirk with Serena explaining further. "Yeah. I didn't want to interrupt and wanted to go back to doing what I was doing before coming." "Loner." Melanie muttered with a playful tone as Serena rolled her eyes at the comment. "Whatever." She looked at Mark as the both of them were standing now. "I have some spare clothes that'll fit you if you want to change out of the ones you're wearing." Mark regarded her a bit warily. "Female clothes?" Serena shook her head as Melanie laugh. "No, they're male clothes."

Now Mark's eyebrow raised in amusement, but there was another emotion that Serena couldn't dicipher. Serena quickly explained herself. "I like their designs. Don't judge me." "I wasn't." "Sure, you weren't." Serena scoffed as Melanie laughed. "When you're both done the others wanted to do karaoke after." "Why?" Serena asked as Melanie grinned cheekily. "I told them about the new system upgrade." "You would." "What's the new upgrade?" Mark asked curiously. "It's more interactive this time around." Serena explained as simply as possible. "I actually have to show you guys while explaining it as it makes sense that way." "Okay, do it then. I'm down as I'm curious about your skills." He grinned at her as Serena groaned. "Ugh, fuck my life."

"Y'know, just stay in those clothes." Serena stated as Mark chuckled. "Nah, don't be like that." "Don't be mean, Rere." Melanie reasoned as Serena sighed and handed her sister part of the trash. "I don't want that." Melanie eyed the mess, but took it anyways. "Thanks." "Yeah, yeah." Serena closed the first aid kit to returned it to the bathroom while Melanie and Mark returned to the living room to throw away the trash. "What happened?" Jeannie asked upon seeing the two first causing Jasmine to looked over at the duo as well. "Mark, you have something on your ear." She pointed at her right ear as he wiped the food off. "Just a mishap. Thanks." Mark explained. "No problem." "Serena's down for karaoke." Melanie told them as the twins smiled. "Okay, cool."

~~~~~~~

Some time after ten the group of eleven finished their karaoke night. They spent the next hour cleaning up the mess and putting everything back where they belong. Serena even returned Mark his clothes that was already washed and dried during the time they were singing. After cleaning the living room, putting away or more like packing the leftover food into containers for the males, washing the dishes, and doing other miscellaneous thing before they ended up talking for another hour about random things. It then somehow led them to the topic about summer vacation and what they were all going to do now that school was done until Autumn semester.

GOT7 didn't go into any specific details about their upcoming schedules for June or July except that it was something exciting to look forward to for the later half of the year. The twins talked about flying out to Vietnam next week to hangout with family for a few weeks. Then to Europe for a week or so for a siblings' trip as their older sister planned some sort of European tour for them to do. After that it was off to Japan to stay with a childhood friend of theirs for the remainder of summer. Once that was done they were gonna go back to the states as they wouldn't be returning back to Seoul which caused the males to be sad upon the news.

The other pair talked about leaving next week as well back to the United States to hang out with their family back in Arizona before meeting up with the brothers in California some time in July. Melanie also mentioned that she would be visting China and Taiwan with a few of her old classmates from grade school in late July before going to Australia to meet her sister again and their aunt Julisa before returning to Seoul some time in August. Serena didn't want to say anything, but went through with it as everyone else had talked about their summer plans. She told them that she was going to visit Singapore and Malaysia to meet her online friends for the last week of July and the same with their aunt Julisa before returning to Seoul.

Soon enough it was past midnight when Jaebeom realized how late it was and told his members it was time to leave. The younger ones whined to stay a bit longer, but eventually relented when the females told them to listen to their leader. They needed their rest before they got all busy and won't have time to actually get in a good night's rest until schedules were over. Jaebeom thanked the quartet gratefully as he ushered his members out of Serena's apartment with the idols bidding the ladies a good night and telling them to stay up to date with their soon-to-be summer activities. The women nodded their heads and said they would before retiring for the night as they had some packing to do before leaving South Korea.

[moviepitpodcast-blog]

My Most Anticipated Movies of 2019

2019 is here! So you know what that means – NEW MOVIES!

Of course, there are a lot of movies coming out this year, and while I’m looking forward to many of them, there are some that stand out among the rest. So here I am, give you my most anticipated movies of the year. It should be noted that of course things could change. For example, movies get shifted around, pulled off the schedule or new movies are put on the schedule that I end up really looking forward to.

So with that said, this list is based off the current schedule that’s out, and they’ll also be done by release date, because it’s just easier that way. Let’s get to it!

 Captain Marvel – March 8th

Yes, this list will include Marvel’s big three movies coming out – deal with it! Okay, now that that’s out of the way, Captain Marvel is something I’ve been looking forward to since it was announced. Not only is the movie Marvel’s first female-led superhero movie, it has a pretty damn great cast. Brie Larson plays the titular hero, aka Carol Danvers, an army pilot who gets caught in the middle of an intergalactic war between two alien races – the Kree and the Skrulls. The movie will also be a good introduction to the character to a lot of people who don’t know anything about the character, and that said, Captain Marvel has some good stories to tell. Captain Marvel co-stars Samuel L. Jackson, Jude Law, Ben Mendelsohn, Clark Gregg, Gemma Chan, Lee Pace and Annette Bening.

 Us – March 15th

Jordan Peele is back behind the camera with another terrifying story, and this time he’s not hiding the creep factor like he did in the trailer for Get Out. Us follows a family (Winston Duke, Lupita Nyong’o, Shahadi Wright Joseph and Evan Alex), who while on a family vacation with friends run into some unexpected visitors. Everyone was talking about the trailer when it dropped on Christmas Day, and it was well worth it, because the trailer starts off innocent and slowly gets weird and creepy until it goes full-on “what the hell is going on?” and just like that, Us, has gone on a lot of people’s Must-Watch List. Us co-stars Elisabeth Moss, Tim Heidecker, Anna Diop and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II.

 Hellboy – April 12th

As hard as it might be for some – including myself – let’s move pass the notion that we will no longer get a third Hellboy movie directed by Guillermo del Toro. That said, the first trailer for the new Hellboy movie actually had me pretty excited. Directed by Neil Marshall (Dog Soldiers, The Descent), the new movie has Hellboy (David Harbour) facing off against an ancient sorceress (Milla Jovovich) named Nimue the Blood Queen bent on revenge. It looks like a Hellboy movie, and seeing Harbour get a lead role in a big movie like this is great. I was a fan of his before Stranger Things and seeing him finally get the recognition he deserves should be awesome to watch. Hellboy co-stars Sasha Lane, Penelope Mitchell, Daniel Dae Kim and Ian McShane.

 Avengers: Endgame – April 26th

Arguably, the biggest Marvel film to date, Avengers: Endgame (yes, it’s called Endgame, you figured it out, good for you) finishes the story they started in Avengers: Infinity War. Honestly, I don’t know what to expect from this, and I like it. The story could pretty much go anywhere, and even though we’ve seen set photos, without that context, we’re just talking in the abyss. I always keep my expectations, hype or what-have-you at the door when watching big movies like this, but I don’t think I’ll be able to contain myself watching this in a theater with all the other fans around.

 Detective Pikachu – May 10th

Loosely based – maybe – off the game of the same name, Tim (Justice Smith) meets an intelligent talking Pikachu (voiced and also apparently motion-captured by Ryan Reynolds) who help each other as they look into the mysterious disappearance of Tim’s father. I, like many probably reading this, grew up with Pokemon and have a special place in my heart for the property. However, I had my doubts about the movie, mainly because it was going to be a CGI-Live Action hybrid, and those tend to not be that great. But DAMN did the trailer change my mind. The world looks great, the designs of the Pokemon look great too, and might be unexpected; because I know I didn’t envision Pikachu with fur. Detective Pikachu co-stars Kathryn Newton, Karan Soni, Rita Ora, Suki Waterhouse, Bill Nighy and Ken Watanabe.

 John Wick: Chapter 3 – May 17th

John Wick (Keanu Reeves) is back again, and this time he’s being hunted down by everyone. At least that’s the impression we got after the ending of John Wick: Chapter 2. The first movie came out of nowhere, and now John Wick is one of the best action series out there. Are they simple (plot-wise)? Sure, but damn there are a lot of fun. John Wick: Chapter 3 co-stars Ian McShane, Halle Berry, Laurence Fishburne, Lance Reddick, Jason Mantzoukas, Robin Lord Taylor, Mark Dacascos and Anjelica Huston.

 Godzilla: King of the Monsters – May 31st

The gigantic sequel follows the agency Monarch trying to control the chaos that is to come when Godzilla battles three new monsters that have been awaken in Mothra, Rodan and the three-headed King Ghidorah. I know the first new Godzilla didn’t get a lot of love, but I personally enjoyed it. Now, not only do we get a sequel, but one that has all of the well-known other monsters we’ve come to know and love/hate. It also helps that the trailers are also great, and it looks epic! Godzilla: King of the Monsters stars Millie Bobby Brown, Kyle Chandler, Vera Farmiga, Ken Watanabe, Sally Hawkins, Ziyi Zhang, O’Shea Jackson Jr., Thomas Middleditch, Bradley Whitford and Charles Dance

 Spider-Man: Far From Home – July 5th

The last Marvel movie of the year, Spider-Man: Far From Home follows Peter (Tom Holland) and his friends on a summer vacation to Europe, where Peter is recruited by Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) to stop a powerful threat. Of course, there have been a lot of set photos to come out, and it’s also been revealed that Jake Gyllenhaal’s Quentin Beck aka Mysterio isn’t a villain and will be working with Spider-Man. Other than that, we don’t know much, but given that Homecoming was a great new addition, Far From Home should be good too, right? Spider-Man: Far From Home co-stars Zendaya, Cobie Smulders, Jacob Batalon and Marisa Tomei.

 Fast & Furious presents: Hobbs & Shaw – August 2nd

A spinoff of the Fast & Furious franchise, Hobbs & Shaw follows Agent Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) teaming up with once again with Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham). Despite how you feel about the Fast & Furious franchise – I personally think they are the ultimate turn-off-your-brain/have fun with it movies – the addition of Johnson’s Hobbs and Statham’s Shaw added a much needed boost to the franchise. Plus, the chemistry between Johnson and Statham was one of the best things about The Fate of the Furious, so a spinoff announcement had me onboard. Add on the fact that the movie will be directed by David Leitch (John Wick, Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2) and have Idris Elba as the villain. Come on, I’m getting in line opening night. Hobbs & Shaw co-stars Vanessa Kirby, Eddie Marsan and Eiza Gonzalez.

 Honorable Mentions

Glass – January 18th

The Prodigy – February 8th

The Curse of La Llorona – April 19th

Brightburn – May 24th

Men in Black International – June 14th

Toy Story 4 – June 21st

The Lion King – July 19th

It: Chapter 2 – September 6th

Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark – August 9th

Zombieland 2 – October 11th

Are You Afraid of the Dark? – October 11th

Star Wars: Episode IX – December 20th

 So, what movies are you looking forward to this year?

[michaelkayauthor-blog]

Esparanza - A Horror Short

There are all kinds of secrets in this world. I’ve always said it and the things I’ve been through prove it true. Esperanza, Texas is one of them. I’m not supposed to talk about Esperanza, I’ve been promised very bad things will happen if I do, but I’ve never cared much for threats. See, I’m sitting here on a quiet beach in Mexico sipping a margarita with enough Pesos to keep me in cheap tequila for the rest of my natural-born life, but I still owe a certain oil company a big fuck you. What better way than spilling the dirty secrets they paid a lot of money to hide?

I used to work a rig out in Middle of Fucking Nowhere Texas. Fifty miles from the border and three hundred from anything resembling a decent meal. Me and eighty-five other roughnecks spent 9 months out of the year holed up in a shit hole company town named by the foreman in a moment of sarcasm. Esperanza, a town that you won’t find on any maps. Not really a town at all. It was just a bunch of disposable barracks thrown up around a company-owned general store and a ramshackle bar with one dirt road running down the middle.

For three years I lived there, and I was an old-timer by Esperanza’s standards. Not a lot of men came back after Christmas, and each year the company would offer big bonuses to pull in the next crop of fools looking to stash enough away for that little house with the white picket fence by pulling black gold out of a wasteland. Every freshie had his story, the reason he’d signed on to the gig. A woman he wanted to impress, a ranch in Montana he had his eye on, or a kid to put through college. No one came to Esperanza without a reason. No fewer than a dozen men died in the three years before everything went to shit, and I always figured their kids would rather have a father than a death benefit.

Of course, the fact men die for oil isn’t a secret to anybody, so let’s jump straight to the meat of this little tale. June 14th, 2011.

Rumors had been going for months that the company had found something big. Court battles, a challenge by the local native tribe, and a slew of inspections had finally ended in an official announcement. We were about to tap the biggest oil reserve discovered in Texas since the booms of old, and they wanted it done fast. Old wells were capped and half the men reassigned to digging wells and setting up new pumpjacks just forty miles outside town.

I was sitting in Mary’s, the only bar servicing the needs of Esperanza’s lonely drunks when the well collapsed. The whole building shook with the force of it and through the dirty tavern window, I could see a cloud of dust rising up from the direction of the new wells. We were all trained in handling disasters, forced to take a refresher class every six months as part of a compromise with OSHA, and the town set into motion in an instant. I was half-drunk, but I made my way to the company office and pull on an old gas mask that smelled of dust and mold. By the time I got to the waiting truck filled with off-duty oil men, it was already half full.

Most the men were unprepared. They were half asleep and half-dressed, only a handful wearing the masks they needed to make their way through the cloud of dust and debris that filled the air as we raced toward the collapse. Can’t say I was surprised by that, all the training in the world won’t prepare a man to act in a real emergency. Half the kids I rode out with were straight out of school, vocational or otherwise, and the other half were drunk old men hoping this’d be their last year digging holes and putting life and limb on the line so some foreign investors could buy another private jet. I was in the latter group myself, but I hadn’t had time to get a good drunk going. Pretty sure that accidental sobriety saved my life, without it I doubt I would have remembered to grab my own mask.

The truck pulled to a sudden stop as we hit the dust cloud billowing out from the collapse site. Most the boys started hacking up a lung, those of us with masks just sat there looking dumbfounded. It maybe wasn’t the brightest idea to drive right into the middle of a giant cloud of Texas desert sand like we could rush in and save the day. We didn’t make it a foot further, and I dropped to my knees in the bed of the old work truck when the driver high-tailed it out of there, going in reverse halfway back to town. No way I'll ever forget what he said when we got back.

“There’s things out there,” He told me when I ran up to him demanding to know why we stopped, “Things out in the dust.”

I was about to shove his ass back in the seat of that truck. I’m no hero, but I had friends in that collapse, and I wasn’t about to leave them out there if I could help it, and my first thought was that the driver had seen men out there covered in dirt and blood and panicked.

Then, one of the boys at the back of the truck collapsed, blood pouring out of his nose. Two more followed him to the ground. Everyone was in a panic then. I rushed over to the first kid who collapsed, his nose was bleeding and his eyes rolled back in his head so far all I could see was white. I’ll never forget the sight of that twenty-two-year-old boy convulsing in the dirt, his hands clawing uselessly at the ground. I had him by the shoulders trying to hold him still when he bit his own tongue off and sprayed blood all over the lollygaggers standing around in a stupor and across the face of the gas mask I hadn’t took off yet.

No point in sugar-coating it now; that was too much for me. Next thing I remember I was behind one of the barracks puking my guts out. I must’ve run off in a panic myself, though I don’t remember it. After I was done losing my head and my lunch, I made my way back toward the parked truck. The men who’d collapsed had already been carted off to the clinic where a nurse - the only medical expert in hundreds of miles - could have a look at them. A little later the foreman came on over the loudspeakers and told everyone we were officially closed for business until further notice. The foreman mentioned at the end that rescue workers were called in to deal with the collapse. I barely registered it, I was already in bed trying to sleep off the vision of that young man’s tongue flopping around on the ground.

Screaming woke me up from my nightmares that night. It was a woman’s scream, and that narrowed it down pretty fast. I jumped out of bed and ran out into the dark in my boxers and a wife-beater heading toward the clinic. Stepping through the door I saw the blood, it was sprayed across the walls and dripping from a single lamp sitting in the corner, casting the room in a reddish glow. That was the first time I saw one of them.

He was an older man, pretty sure his name was Jack or John or maybe James. Something with a J. He was thin and wiry, a tough old man who had spent his life in one kind of field or another. We’d shared drinks a couple of times, but never talked beyond that. I remembered his eyes, though, bright and clear and sharp. He had been one of the men who collapsed right after we got off the truck. Only it wasn’t really him, I’m certain of that. The thing that was crouched in the middle of the room had grayish skin, even in the dim light, and it stopped gnawing on some soft, dark piece of the nurse’s guts long enough to stare at me. Blood caked his lips, and black pieces of flesh were caught between his crooked teeth.

I backed out of the open door behind me, and he watched me as I went. I could hear men heading toward me. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I slammed the front door to the clinic behind me and leaned against it. The buildings were meant to be temporary, and the clinic was basically a small trailer with some pills and a bed in it. As long as I held that door closed I knew he couldn’t get out.

“What the hell’s going on?” the foreman, Doug Crawford, asked as he got there. Doug’s eyes were wide and deep bags were already settling in. It was just past two in the morning the day after the collapse, June 15th.

Eleven men had shown up with Doug, coming to the source of that first scream. As I sat there on the small steps leading up to the front door of a room where a nurse was being eaten, I tried to come up with the words. I didn’t have to; I was saved that effort by screams that erupted from the other end of town.

I don’t know all the details from there; I know screams rose and were cut short. Doug and I looked at each other for a long time. Finally, he turned away and headed straight for his office.

“You,” I told a kid standing with his mouth open, “You make sure this door stays shut. Nothing comes out.”

He stood there looking at me like I was stupid. I didn’t have time to explain everything to him, and I still wasn’t sure how to start. Instead, I just grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him toward the door. “Hold that shut, that’s an order.” The kid nodded; not that he understood what was going on, but I think he was happy somebody was telling him what he should do.

By the time I caught up to Doug he was already unlocking the gun case in the foreman’s trailer. Officially the guns were there in case we ran into any animals, but rumor around town was that it was just in case any cartel boys decided we were easy pickings this close to the border. Either way, I was glad to see them. Doug fumbled with one of the half dozen rifles as he handed it to me.

I liked Doug, he’d been foreman since the town opened and he was always fair. All that aside he was a Massachusetts boy who had fallen into the job when his business went tits-up. He didn’t really know the desert, and sure as shit didn’t know how to handle a gun. Me, I was born and raised in Texas. Learned how to handle a gun years before I learned to handle a woman. If you ask my ex-wife, I learned to handle guns a damn sight better. I was loaded and ready to head out before Doug finished collecting the rest of the guns. Outside we armed as many men as we could with what we had and told them to sit tight.

“We’re gonna check things out and come back. Try not to accidentally shoot your balls off while we’re gone,” Doug told the men gathered around the trailer.

We made our way across town. No need to go into the gory details though; and there were plenty. Most of the men who went out with us to try and rescue those workers had gone crazy in the night. I saw a twenty-three-year-old kid named Russell chewing on the arm of a sixty-year-old man like he was gnawing on the best ribs he’d ever had. That was the first one I put a bullet in, a single .223 soft point square in the forehead. Doug threw up on his shoes when Russell went down, and if I had anything left in my stomach I might have joined him.

Every man we found alive we sent back to the trailer. All told six men joined the ten we’d left there. The boy I’d left at the clinic was gone when we got back there, and I never saw him again. The trailer was empty, the nurse’s body wasn’t there either.

Mary’s was dark when Doug and I made our way through the half-open door. Mary’s was a converted aircraft hangar with a long bar across one wall and a kitchen in the very back. The lights were dim, and smoke poured out of the swinging door that led to the kitchen. I went to check on the cook and Doug watched the door. The smoke was pouring out of the deep fryer, but the kitchen was empty. I pulled the basket full of charred nuggets that might have been tater tots in another life and turned around to head out.

By the time I heard Doug scream, it was already too late. Mary must’ve been behind the bar, hiding, waiting. Or maybe it takes time, and she just hadn’t woken up yet. You’d have to ask someone else to explain that, Christ knows I wasn’t trying to study the damn things. Either way, I stepped through the swinging door and she was there latched on to Doug’s thigh. Her teeth went right through the denim like it was paper and blood was already pooling on the floor. He lowered his gun and blew her brains out, took her head clean off at that range.

Like I said, I liked Doug. I’m not proud of what came next, but Mary hadn’t been part of the crew that went out to save those men. I could see where Mary had been bitten clean to the bone on her upper arm, though. Maybe she’d bled out, and hadn’t turned until after she was dead. That thought keeps me up at night now, wondering if I had a choice, but it didn’t even occur to me then. Probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway. Doug was down, leaning against the bar with his gun across his legs with blood pouring out.

“Don’t,” Doug was pleading under his breath. He realized before I did what came next.

“If I don’t, you turn into one of those things. You don’t wanna go like that.”

“I don’t want to go at all,” he wheezed.

I don’t remember pulling the trigger, but I must’ve done. I remember Doug’s body, though, leaned up against the bar with his brains decorating the wood paneling behind him.

I stayed in Mary’s that night, and in the morning men in moon suits and guns came in and dragged me away. I was isolated, quarantined, poked, and prodded. I was released August 18th and paid a hefty sum if I agreed to disappear permanently. I might have argued, but some very stern men in very expensive looking suits made it clear that if I tried to go public they’d see to it I ended up a permanent resident at one of Dallas’ fine mental health facilities. Probably wouldn’t be hard to do to a man screaming about a zombie cover up even if these particular suits didn’t seem more like government spooks than oil money men. I did the smart thing and took the cash.

Officially a mine collapsed and released a toxic cloud of methane gas. No one who knows the real story is talking. I’ve tried to get in touch with other survivors, and with Doug’s family. No one is talking, no one will even listen. They’ve either been paid off or intimidated into keeping their mouths shut.

They sold the land to the government as part of a new military testing ground. No satellite images, no planes overhead. Nice and neat.

Or it would be, if not for the rumors you hear from coyotes, men paid to smuggle people into the states, over the past few years. I’ve kept tabs, paid the right people and asked the right questions since I made my way south of the border. Rumor has it that across the border in the land of the free the desert has gotten a lot more dangerous than it used to be. It’s not militias with guns or border patrol agents that has them scared.

It’s Los Muertos. The Dead.

[illusoryteam]

Her Name is “K”

Writer: okbdsm Source: Private entry from personal Website Date: May 14, 2018 at 10:34 P.M. CDT Note: This post is edited to remove identifying location information and information that may lead to the identity of the person I am posting about.

This is going to be an incredibly long journal entry, and since the person I am talking about is a friend of mine that I’ve known since elementary school and she is still on my Facebook friends list, I don’t plan on talking about her on a public platform. However, that’s the beauty regarding having a Website in which I can make certain things able to be viewed to the public or have it only able to be viewed to myself and certain people.

“K” is a lady that I met in 1988 when I attended in kindergarten A.M. class at my old public school. After kindergarten, we would end up having the same 1st grade teacher before we went our separate ways. Granted, while we were friends, we were not particularly close (largely due to the fact that I mostly hung out with my guy friends at the time). The two of us would not be in any of the same classes again until middle school.

“K” and I would end up being in the 8th grade middle school band, and while the two of us were still friends, the two of us were still not overly close, at first. However, the two of us ended up getting a little bit closer due to our few interactions we had in band. One of the things that I admired about her was with how sweet and caring she was. Additionally, since I was an occasional target for being picked on by people at school, she also helped to encourage me to stand up for myself a bit more than I did. Thinking about it now, this was likely me being a stupid 14 year old teenage boy at the time, but I found myself getting a crush on her when she invited me over to her house to celebrate her 14th birthday. Unfortunately, I was not able to attend her 14th birthday party since I was away that weekend with an activity with my Boy Scouts of America Troop. Despite that, that small act that she performed would have me enamored with her, and throughout the summer of 1997, I ended up obtaining a crush on her.

As a broke 14 year old teenage boy, I wanted to do some things to impress her and show her that I cared about her. I don’t remember everything that I got her during the summer of 1997, but I remember leaving her small homemade items in her mailbox from time to time. One of the things that I remember leaving her in her mailbox was some free tickets to a baseball game. I would end up going to that same baseball game, and to my surprise, I also saw “K” and one of her friends there. Being a stupid 14 year old teenage boy at the time, I would do things like skip around when I saw her and act really silly as I skipped/ran away.

Anyway, before the start of our 9th grade school year, I would end up writing a note and leaving it in her mailbox letting her know that I had a crush on her. I did not really expect her to acknowledge my feelings for her, but during our 9th grade freshman year of high school, “K” and I would talk a bit more and got a bit closer. Although she dated someone else for the first quarter to half of the school year, I still maintained my feelings for her. At this time, I tried to make it not very obvious that I had feelings for her, but she and a few of her friends knew about it. I would also tell a few of my friends about it, but I pretty much swore my friends to secrecy since I did not want to make things awkward between “K” and I. I will say that during one of the classes she and I shared together, she gave me a note thanking me for the things I got her during the summer of 1997.

The major turning point with “K” was when I and a few others were invited over for Christmas Eve 1997. While I don’t remember what I gave her for Christmas that year (very likely, I either purchased or drew a Christmas card), she would end up drawing me a small Christmas card and gave me a bar of Hershey’s Cookies ‘n’ Creme Candy Bar. Before heading home that night, “K” ended up giving me a hug that lasted for several moments. With that hug, I experienced such a warmth flow through me that I knew that I did not just have a crush on her.

I was in love with “K.”

While she was absolutely beautiful, her personality was what I fell in love with.

“K” would even be the first lady that I would dance with, and this needs a little bit of backstory.

During 7th grade, 8th grade, and 9th grade, while I would go to school dances and have been asked I wanted to dance by one, I was too nervous to dance with any girls. In theory, I knew where to put my hands, but in actuality, I was too nervous to do it because I did not want to put my hands on the wrong area by mistake. That would all change with a band trip to San Antonio, Texas.

In April 1998, our high school would travel to San Antonio to participate in a concert band contest. For recreation, we would end up going to the Alamo, Sea World, Six Flags Fiesta Texas, and a few other places. After going to Sea World and finishing dinner one night, some of us had the option where we could go to some place to play some arcade games and others were also able to go to a dance. Since I brought my Sega Genesis with me for the trip, I opted to go to the dance instead. However, for us to remain at the dance, we could not be wall flowers. While we were not required to dance, we could not just stand in the corner. Somehow, I managed to avoid being a wall flower, and at some point, we ended up forming a circle where people were dancing in it. It was the last song of the night, and “K” was in the circle. Of course, I was content with just watching her dance, but something unexpected happened.

“K” pulled me inside the circle, and I started slow dancing with her.

Naturally, I was nervous beyond belief.

This was “K!”

I loved “K!”

“K” knew I liked her!

Some people at the dance knew that I liked “K!”

However, as time went on, I felt my worries just melt away and enjoyed the moment that “K” and I had together. To this day, I would like to think that “K” knew that I was nervous as well, and she helped me out more than she could ever imagine. After the dance ended, I would end up thanking her for the dance, and I would say that my dance with her was the absolute highlight of the trip.

While I was hoping to spend the 1998 – 1999 school year trying to get closer to “K” (while hoping that the two of us would end up dating), that plan came to an end on June 24, 1998 when I heard that “K” and her family were moving to another state. Her dad worked for Delta Airlines in a major metropolitan area, and he would commute from home to the major metropolitan area for work. Ultimately, it was decided that her family would move to join her dad in the major metropolitan area , and so, on August 4, 1998, “K” and her family would end up moving from her home town. The thing that I have regretted the most was never telling her in person how much I cared about her.

Despite her moving to the major metropolitan area , the two of us would remain in touch throughout high school via phone calls and me sending her letters, birthday cards, and Christmas cards, and she would occasionally visit her home town to visit other friends as well. It was at this point that I would start ending my letters that I mailed to her with “Love” due to the fact that I wanted to let her know how much I loved and cared about her. I vastly regretted never being able to tell her how much I loved and cared about her when she lived in her home town, so I told myself that I would not make that same mistake again after she moved.

After high school ended, I would continue to send “K” birthday and Christmas cards over the years (there were very rare occasions in which I did not send her one), and even to this day, I recently mailed her a birthday card to celebrate her 35th birthday. However, while I still love and care about “K,” as the years went by, I have started to develop a few criticisms as well. This is something that I will spend some time talking about, and it is one of the primary reasons why I created this private post to finally get my frustrations out.

I do not know how many letters I have written “K” over the years, and I certainly do not remember how many birthday and Christmas cards I have mailed her. At the very most, I have mailed her around 20 birthday cards (minus any years that I might have missed) and around 19 Christmas cards (minus any that I might have missed). Sometimes, she will acknowledge via text message thanking me for remembering her birthday or sending her a Christmas card, but most of the time, I do not receive any thanks at all. Furthermore, I only have one address to mail things to her, and it’s her dad’s address. For a little while, I did have an address for her dad and an address for her mom when she was living with her mom for a while, but after her mom moved from the major metropolitan area, I had to use my fallback of sending things to her dad’s place. Fortunately, her dad has lived in the same house for nearly 20 years, but she lives between 30 to 40 minutes away from her dad, and should her dad ever move from where he lives, I would no longer have any way of sending “K” letters, Christmas cards, etc. unless she shares her current address with me.

Considering that I have mailed her many letters, birthday cards, and Christmas cards, you would think that she would occasionally mail me a letter or something. To date, since she moved to Texas, I have not received a single letter, birthday card, or Christmas card from her. During a trip to Oklahoma in either 1998 or 1999, she did hand me a letter that she was going to mail me, but beyond that, I have not received anything. When I actually write letters to “K,” I put a lot of thought and effort into writing them, and these letters can easily span two or more pages if I wrote front and back, and for me to not have received anything from her after the extraordinary effort I put into them, it can be very disheartening at times.

Now, I am not stupid to think that she does not date people because I know she dates people, and I am not into trying to convince her to date me when she’s already dating someone else. Heck, since she has moved from her home town, I have dated three ladies (one relationship being on and off due to distance, but it lasted from September 1999 to April 2000 with a very long break in between, one relationship lasting from November 2003 to April 2004, and one relationship lasting from October 11, 2008 to November 30, 2010). However, I do try to call her and/or send her a text message (at least) once a month so I can see how she is doing. Lately though, I have not had a lot of success in trying to reach her via text messaging. At the end of 2016, I sent her 66 SMS/MMS messages and received 20 SMS/MMS messages from her, and at the end of 2017, I sent her 115 SMS/MMS messages, and I received 23 SMS/MMS from her. I do not remember how many times I have called her in 2017, but the vast majority of the time, I would end up getting her voice mail.

This is very disheartening to me because I have tried my best to keep in touch with her since she moved to the major metropolitan area because I want to still remain a part of her life. However, I think that part of the reason why I am having so much trouble trying to reach her these days is due to the aspects of adulthood and the fact that I told her my feelings for her. I do not regret my feelings for “K,” and I will always continue to love her. However, these days, when I think about her, part of me gets upset because of the amount of effort I have made over the years to try to remain in touch with her seems to be in vain. Additionally, another part of me feels sad because of the fact that I am not as close to her as I would like to be. I remember many points of the past 20 years where I would think about “K” on a near daily basis, and these days, I will think about her from time to time each month but either become upset or saddened for the reasons above.

Perhaps, this is a sign that I am starting to realize that I value my friendship and love of her more than she does with me, or perhaps, this is a sign that I am starting to let go and slowly starting to move on from her (particularly since I have been largely focusing on the same lady for twenty years). While I do not see myself removing her from my friends list on Facebook anytime soon (I am sure someone will suggest that I do that, but I do not remove people from my friends list on Facebook unless they are bots or spam accounts), I do not see myself making an extraordinary effort anymore to try to keep in touch with her. As always, my overall policy is that when I am friends with someone, unless they outright state that they do not want to be friends with me anymore, they are stuck with me for life, and I will try to do what I can to be there for them.

Regardless, although we are drifting apart, I do love “K” very deeply.